#i hope this and my previous posts settle where i stand on this matter

[shiny-jr]

damnation (peek I?)

Warning: Yes, this is a yandere thing. Gender-neutral reader.

Characters: Ace Trappola, Trey Clover, Cater Diamond, Riddle Rosehearts.

Summary: When you commit a crime, you receive a punishment. This is especially true in your society. No matter the crime, your punishment is the same: banishment. But to where you will be sent in exile and how miserable will it be? No one knows, because no one has ever returned.

Note: So, as mentioned in previous posts, this is only a snippet of what is to come in a project I’m working on. I just wanted to do something for my followers since we have surpassed the milestone that is 4,000 hearts, which is huge. So thank you! Unfortunately, I don’t really have time for a special like I’ve done before where I accept requests since I’ve been so busy with irl stuff and the current twst quiz project. So here’s a small bit of what you can hopefully expect. Remember, I may or may not change things, so what you see now may not be the same later in the final result. That being said, I’m sorry I couldn’t provide much else besides peeks at three of the seven results. I still have a LOT more to write. Like, a ton. But I hope you all look forward of what is to come. Added: Deleted the Scarabia and Pomefiore part to create their own sneak-peeks later.

I . . . II . . . III . . . IV . . . V . . . VI . . . VII

First there will be questions you must answer. Questions that I will not reveal in this sneak-peek, but based on the answers you give to those questions, you will receive a result with a story. This post is a peek at some of those stories/results. Important things to keep in mind that you learn from the questions: 

The mc is deemed a criminal in their society.

All criminals in this society are banished, no matter how insignificant or significant the crime may be. 

This particular society makes a show of banishment, to make others fear this fate. Which mc recalls seeing trials on tv about past criminals. 

All criminals are never seen or heard from again. No one knows for certain what happens to them, but most assume death. 

Although the most popular fantastical theory is that criminals become henchmen for infamous evil-doers, and receive punishment there that may range from anywhere like a violent painful death to spending eternity in some tiny horrid prison. 

THE RED QUEEN

Robes. You were wearing robes of the finest quality that weighed heavily on your shoulders. This surface you laid on felt... nice. Soft, nothing like the hard bench of the prison cell. As you sat up and recalled your current dire situation, you felt a sense of dread loom overhead like a thick blanket of gray clouds. Immediately, fearfully, you scanned your surroundings. Everything was painted red, there was so much red velvet. The floors were polished checkered black and white and the furniture, if not completely red, was crafted of finely carved wood. It was fancy here. Safe, for now. Wherever this place was.

There was something hefty on your head, only noticing its weight settling on your skull as you moved to stand up from the crimson red sheets on the king-sized mattress. As you removed the item from your head, you were perplexed to see a small golden crown and a heart-shaped staff beside the spot you had laid on. Wait just a moment... red everywhere? A fancy setting? A crown and a heart-shaped staff? Rapidly you dashed over to the mirror just beside the bed, gasping at your appearance.

You were dressed just like royalty. And not just any royalty, like a king. A king of red with a heart-shaped staff... Just like the meek king that was married to the ruthless Queen of Hearts from the fairytales. So it was true, criminals were often sent to dangerous tales where they would perish. And you... you were a criminal and you were here, but... you were the king. How did the story go again?

The Red Queen, or Queen of Hearts, ruled over Wonderland with an iron fist. She would behead anyone who got in her way, and her reign terrorized the residents of the realm. That is, until Alice fell down a hole and arrived in Wonderland. She would eventually free this land from the oppressive rein of the queen. As for the king... what happened to him again? He didn't really appear in the story. You wracked your memory for an answer, when the horrid realization came to you. The Red Queen had been so terribly jealous and suspected that her husband was cheating, that she had him beaded! His head left to rot as it floated in a river of blood, surrounded by the heads of other victims, and the king's lifeless skull still with the crown. He had died before Alice even arrived in Wonderland!

You clutched your neck, grimacing at the thought of your own detached head, crown still attached, doomed to sail in a moat of blood. It made you sick to your stomach just thinking about it. There had to be a way to prevent your death, or at least stall for time, but how? The king couldn't just up and run away! People would take notice immediately, someone would inform the queen, and you'd be a goner for sure! But then what? You couldn't kill her either, could you...? It certainly was an idea. You would be doing a favor for the rest of Wonderland too...

THUMP!

Abruptly the doors flew open, nearly causing you to shriek. But you managed to hold your tongue as you quickly placed your crown back on and clutched your staff. When your eyes focused on the door, you were surprised and almost relieved to see the figure of a short young man that had slammed the doors open. He was... rather adorable, actually. It caused you to tilt your head, endeared by his appearance.

The young man had hair that shamed the red roses, and wide gray eyes. As soon as his eyes landed on you, however, his face grew flush and his expression twisted into one of rage. Immediately he slammed the doors shut behind him, stomping up to you, his heels violently clicking against the tiled floors. When the short young man was in your face, another horrible realization dawned on you. With that crown on his head and his wondrous red garbs, this could only be the queen. Or at least, someone meant to be the red queen.

“You knave! Where have you been lurking?!”

“I…” You were at a loss for words. What were you supposed to say? What was the king even doing before you got here? Most importantly, how would you avoid the queen’s wrath?

At your lack of a response, he only seemed to grow more frustrated as he threw wild accusations, “You–– You’ve been sneaking about, seducing the men of my court, haven’t you?! I shall have your head––!”

“Wha–– N-No, I haven’t!” You blurted out. The king was originally beheaded because the queen was jealous and thought she would lose him to others. So if you could assure him that your heart belonged to him, well… survival just might be possible. Although acting wasn’t necessarily your strong point, you could only try for the sake of living another day. Nervously you smiled, throwing aside your staff as you lifted your hands to gently hold his fist he had been angrily waving near your face. Thank god he didn’t have a knife or anything of the sort, or you feared he may have tried to stab you out of raging envy. “How could I ever dare to throw my loyalty to you away…? You are amazing…! I apologize sincerely if I haven’t been able to express my love for you properly. S-Sometimes it feels like you’re really too much for my heart to handle, you in all your… glory…!” Oh god, this was going terribly. All you could do to give the messy act a bow to top it off, was lean your head down and hesitantly kiss the back of his hand.

Miraculously, that seemed to work. Almost. The queen’s face was no longer as flushed, but he gazed down at you as you lingered at his hand. Suspicion was still evident in his eyes. “How do I know?”

“H-Huh…?”

“How do I know you aren’t lying? How do I know you won’t leave me as well? How do I know that you still love me? Prove it to me.” Those gray eyes of his watched you carefully, seemingly unhappy with your lack of a response. After about five seconds of no answer, his face scrunched up and he bellowed, “Guards!! Gua–– mmph!”

Not knowing what else to do, you kissed him. He wanted a sign of devotion, right? Oh god, this was it. Your death was here and now. You had no other way to shut him up. If you covered his mouth with your hands, you were a goner. If you attacked him, you were a goner. If you tried to continue reasoning, you were still a goner! You can’t believe that this was how you died, having to kiss a stranger as your last desperate attempt to live. Well, he wanted a sign. You were ready for him to push you off and armored guards come running in to drag you to the guillotine, when the most unexpected thing happened. He froze, he didn’t fight back or scream bloody murder.

When you slowly pulled away, you were stunned. His face was flush again, but for an entirely different reason other than anger. There was a dazed look on his face, and it almost looked as if he wanted to do it again judging by how he gazed longingly at your lips. It was then you understood that your reckless decision making might’ve just saved your neck.

The red ruler frowned, but you were unsure if it was because he was unsatisfied with something or if it were for another reason entirely. This time, when he opened his mouth, he spoke softly, as if still dazed. “You scoundrel… How dare you play with my heart like this? I should still take your head for that.” You gulped, but he continued. “But… I truly didn’t want to get rid of you. So I’m glad we can avoid that now. I expect to see you well away from the noblemen.”

“Y-Yes… Your Majesty.”

At your obedient response, he smiled and patted your head. “Good.” Taking one step closer, he leaned forward and pressed a kiss against your cheek. He lingered there for a few moments, before taking one step back.

The action left you flustered, embarrassed, because not only had you kissed a stranger but they had kissed you in return. And not only that, this crimson ruler believed you were his partner, the king! Under normal circumstances, you would’ve considered yourself lucky to land in such a position since the king has so much power and wealth. But in this type of situation, you can only shudder to think of what may come next and what would’ve become of you. Because these were no ordinary circumstances, and this was no normal kind ruler.

“Come along now. I don’t want you alone, do you understand?”

“Yes… Your Majesty.”

He beckoned you towards the very doors he entered from, and when he opened them, you were met with another character. It was a tall man with glasses and short messy dark green hair. Immediately he bowed to the queen, but when his eyes landed on you, he looked as if he saw a ghost.

“Change of plans, Trey. We will not be beheading my dear today. Nor tomorrow, I think. They’ve become quite affectionate, so my doubts have been dismissed.”

“O-Of course, Your Majesty…” The glass-wearing man, Trey, glanced over at you with disbelief, but he looked a bit relieved, it’s as if he wanted to say something. But he opted to hold his tongue and instead shifted his gaze forward as he walked beside the red-haired royal. “There is still that soldier imprisoned that displeased you.”

“Ah yes, the one that claimed to see those messy blonde locks but failed to capture our lost wanderer. Bring him to me in the throne room.” Just then he glanced at you as you walked a bit behind him, “My dear, you must be there with me. This should be quite the spectacle. I will see you in a moment.”

“A-As you say, Your Majesty…” You replied stiffly.

He frowned and stopped in his tracks before grabbing your collar and bringing your face closer to his. What you half expected was a sharp knife against your throat, something that would kill you, but there was no such thing. There was only his sharp gaze and disappointed tone. “You’re supposed to respond with: my dear. Not Your Majesty, not Rosehearts, but perhaps I’ll allow Riddle for now. Do you understand, dearest?”

So his name was Riddle. Judging by Riddle’s tone, he wasn’t angry, but rather irked that all the sweetness from earlier was now gone. Proceeding, you chose your words carefully as you attempted to smile as convincingly as possible, “Y-Yes, of course, anything you say, Riddle, my darling.”

At your words his cheeks became a pink hue before he let go of you and cleared his throat, quickly turning away and proceeding forward towards the end of the hall where he had whatever duties to fulfill. So you were left with Trey, his subordinate. The calm tall man’s shoulders sagged once the royal left, all the tension seemingly evaporating from his body. When he gave you a somewhat soft smile, your worries ceased for the moment as well. “I’m glad you’re still intact. I was certain you were a goner.” He was… nice? “You need to be more careful. I don’t know what you did to change Riddle’s mind, but he was ready to behead you himself. You know how he keeps that huge battle ax under his bed. He mentioned something about using that, and I thought he was going to use it to chop your head clean off.”

Oh god. That little guy was going to do that? That stupid kiss really did save your skin. “Heh, I’m still a little shaken…” Wait, you were supposed to be acting like the king! What did the king even act like? How were you supposed to know? He never even lived long enough to make it into the story! “I, um, am very appreciative towards your concern… Trey.”  

Trey appeared a bit surprised but he then smiled once more at you. “We’ll talk more later. Right now, we have a situation on our hands.”

What kind of situation? You didn’t even have time to ask when Trey led you down the checkered hall to an opening behind velvet red curtains which were the entrance directly to the large elegant throne room. There, you saw another stranger talking animatedly to the less-than-pleased-looking Rosehearts. This stranger had orange hair that brushed against his lower neck, and he had much more enthusiasm than those you had encountered thus far.

“Dear, there you are.” Instantly Riddle visibly brightened up as he gestured to the soft smaller heart-shaped throne beside his much larger grand seat. “Come, sit, we’re currently discussing the important matters at hand. Such as the dilemma with our prisoner. Cater, continue.”

When this Cater, fellow’s, green eyes trailed over to you, they became filled with surprise as he fumbled over his words, “Huh–– O-Oh! Right!” Forcing his gaze back on the red-haired royal, he began explaining, “There’s nothing really new to talk about, Your Majesty! I mean, seriously, this rookie was just the unlucky one that happened to see that blondie Ellis. According to him when I went to question him, he just said that he saw the guy in blue and when he went to confront him, Ellis escaped with some purple beastman!”

“Purple beastman…?” For a mere moment he appeared perplexed, when quickly the dots began to connect in his mind as he gasped, “Chen’ya! Why, the nerve of that––!”

When you saw his face begin to heat up again and a look of anger crossed his face, you slowly placed your hand over his arm that rested on the armrest of the throne. Then, he froze, everyone else, Trey, Cater, the few servants, the many armored guards in the room, they all were wide-eyed at what you had done. You had touched the queen when they were about to enter a fit of rage! You messed up–– Shit––

Riddle released a slow breath before placing his other hand atop your own. You felt such a massive flood of relief knowing you made the right move when he appeared much calmer as he nodded his head toward you, “Thank you, my dear. We shall discuss a proper punishment for that wretched feline later. For now…” Instantly his voice did a one-eighty as he turned his head toward the two imposing doors and shouted, “Bring him!!”

Nervously you looked over at Trey who stood tall and upright by Riddle’s side, and he remained oddly focused on the door. And that orange-haired guy, Cater, where did he go…?

“Hey…!”

Your eyes flittered over to you right where Cater was bent over a bit to whisper in your ear, while everyone else was distracted by the prisoner being escorted inside.

“I’m so happy that you’ve alive…! Don’t go dying on me so quickly, ‘kay? You wouldn’t leave me all alone here, would you?”

“Uh… no, of course not.” Huh. This Cater guy seemed pretty close to the king, or now you actually.

When you averted your eyes to the front, you listened to the clacking of armor as you watched more soldiers bring forward one of their own. Yet unlike all the others masked by metal, this soldier in shackles didn’t have a helmet. His messy red hair stuck out every which way, which made you wonder how on earth he even managed to fit that mess of hair under a helmet at all. His eyes were glued to the floor, and he wore a stiff frown as his shackles rattled with every step he took until he was right before the steps leading up to the red royal. When he refused to kneel, he was pushed down to his knees as Riddle eyed him with disdain.

Riddle wasted no time, because as soon as this prisoner was on his knees, he began his tirade of questions. “Ace Trappola, was it? We know you saw Ellis. Do you know where he is?”

The soldier’s head lolled forward a bit, his warm-colored eyes stopping on you for a moment as you gazed back at him. In a way, this Ace reminded you of… well, you. In shackles, forced to kneel, in front of a higher authority that was obviously not particularly fond of you, and likely with a sentence that could only mean your doom ahead of you. In a way, you did feel for him after hearing the basis of why he was arrested.

All was silent, only his shackles could be heard again as he slowly shrugged and snapped back, “I’d like to know that too! I mean, I’m sure wherever he is, he’s free as a bird. Meanwhile, me? Locked up for trying to do my job––!”

“Failing to do your only job.” Riddle corrected with a scoff. “I will ask you one more time. Where. Is. Ellis?”

Ace, still annoyed, continued. He must’ve been either stupid or brave for continuing. Although it might’ve been both as he mocked him. “Didn’t you hear me the first time? I. Don’t. Know.”

Under your hand you felt Riddle’s fingers dig into the armrest, his knuckles growing white as he raised his voice an octave, “What if I take off your head? Will you know then?”

“If you took my head, you wouldn’t get any answers after that.” He retorted with a slight eye roll.

Underneath your hand you could feel Roseheart’s anger growing the tighter he dug his nails into the chair. When you saw his face, you and everyone else could tell that he was fit to burst, no doubt ready to seal this soldier’s doom. Instantly you shot up from your throne, wanting to help save this prisoner. However, you very quickly began to regret it when all eyes darted over to your form, and you now became the center of attention. You couldn’t just sit back down, so with no other choice, you awkwardly cleared your throat and proceeded nervously, “My dearest, earlier when in our chambers I had an… um… epiphany! A vision! Y-Yes, I had a vision…! Ellis will slay your–– our, pet dragon jabberwocky.”

Instantly Riddle’s eyes widened. “He killed our jabberwocky?!”

“No…! No, at least not yet!”

Technically you weren’t lying. The story goes that the Red Queen had a powerful dragon, the jabberwocky, which was the main reason why she could keep such a grip on the kingdom with no rebellion ever coming close to dethroning her. At least, that is until Alice comes along and slays the jabberwocky. If you could somehow get rid of Alice, or Ellis in this case, and stay in Riddle Roseheart’s good graces, you would have it made! It was practically certain that the court back home thought you would’ve been beheaded already and your head would float in that river of blood for eternity. Yet here you were, alive, and if things went smoothly, you could live out your life in splendor here. Yes, you’d have to deal with the red royal, but if you could just stay in his good graces at all times, you would have a wonderfully lavish life! At this point you were just speeding things up, Ellis’ intentions of slaying the jabberwocky probably weren’t supposed to be revealed until much later. But, it would make a perfect excuse now.

As all eyes remained on you, you recounted your fake tale, “It all makes sense now…! In… In my vision I saw… A red-haired knight, um, clashing swords with a blonde man in blue and white!” Well, that part was a lie. There never was a red-haired knight in the stories. But this was an opportunity to potentially save Ace as well, and give him a chance to redeem himself in Riddle’s eyes. When you turned to face Ace, he was gazing at you with furrowed eyebrows, but you proceeded anyway as you gave your attention to Riddle now. “Riddle, I think–– I mean, I b-believe that knight is this one here in front of us.”

“Him?” The royal exclaimed in disbelief, looking at the soldier with something akin to disgust. To which the said soldier stuck out his tongue before a stern glare from Trey and Cater made Ace close his mouth. Riddle blinked, quiet for a moment before gazing up at you, his expression softening as he flipped over his hand so it held yours. “Is that what you were doing in our chambers alone? You were studying texts and had a vision, to save me?”

“Y…Yes…?”

His big gray eyes became fixated on you, as his voice became soft when he replied, “I’ve misjudged you, my dear… I believed you were being unfaithful, but you were working hard for me. How wrong I was.” The way he looked at you could only be described as adoringly.

It made you nervous, but you could only awkwardly smile in return. In order to ensure your own life of comfort here, you had to be sure to ruin the plot of the story. This meant that Ellis, the protagonist, could not win no matter what. Although it pained you to do such a thing, knowing that the outcome would most likely mean death by beheading him and his allies, you were more afraid of death than you were of the hero. For this, you would have to make sure the antagonist, Riddle Rosehearts in the role of the Red Queen, obtained a happy ending instead of a bad ending where he himself would be banished after being defeated by Ellis.

Clearing your throat, you hesitantly listed off the sequence of events in the way you recalled them playing out, “In my vision I saw… a blonde boy in blue, a purple feline beastmen, and a hatter, among other allies. Ellis will… will attempt to infiltrate the palace, and gain your favor under a disguise, and steal the ancient sword that can slay our Jabberwocky.” As all eyes and ears remained on you, you hesitated once again, mentally apologizing for what you were about to do. Maybe in the end, you might be able to plead with your supposed spouse to spare them. But deep down, you knew it was unlikely for the ruthless tyrant to even consider the idea. “Your Majesty, my darling, i-if I may make a suggestion…?”

Riddle nodded as he listened attentively, “Go on.”

Thankfully you had moved your hands away from his, and had them folded in your lap so he couldn’t feel the way your fingers trembled with anxiety. “I would like to suggest we allow this knight before us to carry the sword, sheathed and hidden at all times. Let this be his redemption–– um, please, if you allow it, your Majesty.” Said knight gazed up in surprise. “It would be best to keep sir Ace in our sights. So might I ask that he and another capable knight become my guards?” Guards. Smart move, especially if things get hairy later. “I-I’d also like to suggest an increase in your personal escorts too… my dear. So… so you’ll be safe. And, no one else besides those in this room, will know of what we spoke of today––”

“That way, Ellis will come here all on his own, and if he searches for the sword it will not be there.” Riddle finished, to which you nodded. He caught on quickly. “That’s brilliant!” You nearly breathed a sigh of relief as the red royal turned to glance at his two subordinates, Trey and Cater, only to gesture to the former prisoner and demand of them, “Unbind him, Trey. How can he wield a sword if his hands are bound?”

Trey slowly stepped forward as Ace was allowed to stand, and he unlocked the shackles around the knight. Ace continued to peer up at you, suddenly flashing a grateful smile. To which you only caught a glimpse of before being distracted by the redhead on the throne.

“Cater!” Cater stood upright immediately and awaited orders from the royal. “Find a suitable knight to escort my partner! I expect only the strongest and most obedient of knights! Am I understood?”

“You got it, Your Majesty! I already have a few in mind.”

“Wonderful. I will be interviewing them myself, as well as hand-picking my own escorts.” Riddle stood from his throne, tossing out more commands and orders to be followed by his remaining subordinate and the guards that had escorted the former prisoner. “You lot, I want an increase on the perimeter and another search crew to hunt down that wretched boy Ellis! Trey, go and fetch the sword. As for you, Ace Trappola,” Turning to face the knight, he warned, “You have one more chance. Should you fail a second time, there will be no do-overs. Your head will roll and your family shall pay the price for your mistakes.”

For a mere moment, disbelief and anger flashed on Ace’s face. Just as he opened his mouth, you spoke up, “T-Thank you, Your Majesty…! You really are so… merciful.” Better to be a pawn in this game than to be dead.

Riddle turned his attention to you before smiling, such a true and proud smile as he declared, “I have you to thank for this, for saving my kingdom and protecting me. Once we have Ellis and his companions captured, we will have a morning execution for him, with front row seats to the show." As his eyes drifted back to the onlookers, he commanded, "All of you shall speak nothing of what transpired in this room.”

A chorus of Yes, Your Majesty echoed in the chamber. The royal nodded, content for now, sending you one last smile before turning on his heels and walking off to elsewhere with Cater in tow. Leaving you alone with Trey and Ace as all other attendants and soldiers exited the throne room to go fulfill their duties.

Just for a moment, you wanted to talk to Ace alone. There was something about Trey, something about the way he watched you so calmly but there was something in those yellow eyes behind those glasses. Something that made it seem like he knew your secret, like he knew you were not really the king. You weren’t sure if it was your paranoia getting to you and your mind was just playing tricks on you, but you wanted to distance yourself as far away from him as possible. As the former prisoner made his way towards you, you cleared your throat and spoke quietly, but loud enough for Trey to hear. “Can–– M-May I have a word with you, sir Ace…? In private.”

“Sure, I’m free now.” He half joked, giving a bit of a grin which didn’t do much to ease your worries.

Trey stood beside the empty throne, watching as you glanced over at him and made a gesture for him to carry on with the assigned duty of retrieving the legendary sword, as dictated by His Majesty. To which he did, after he carefully observed the way you scurried behind velvet curtains with the knight not too far behind.

When you were finally out of sight with Ace, you noticed his raised eyebrow. Noticing this and the way he tapped his foot, you hesitated, unsure where you were even going with this or what you should do now. “You… You look like you have something to say.”

“Why’d you save me?” He demanded, all that cheerfulness from before gone now as things took a serious turn. Looking you up and down, he crossed his arms and continued, “You could’ve had your cute little hubby chop off my head like all the others before me. So, say it. That’s the reason you wanted to talk alone, isn’t it?”

He got you. Were you that obvious? You’d definitely have to work on being more discreet… Looking around twice to make sure no one was listening in, you huddled with him in a corner by the stained glass windows as you whispered hurriedly, in a panic, “O-Okay, whew, you’re gonna think I’m crazy, but… I’m not really the king, or queen, or whatever role I’m supposed to play here! Well, I guess I am now? Uhhh… h-here! It’s like this: I was put on trial in my homeworld, and as punishment I was banished. When I woke up, I was in Roseheart’s bed and he started talking to me like I was an unfaithful partner! I didn’t understand it, until I realized that it was all exactly like a story I read as a child. My punishment was to become the king that dies by being beheaded by his own wife! I… I got out of that somehow, and now, well…”

Ace was looking at you as if you were crazy, as if you had grown an extra head or something. His arms were crossed and he continued to stare at you. Should you have done that? Could you trust him? Well, he did owe you his life. If things really came down to it, you could have him arrested again and beheaded. Play the victim, call guards, and make up some lie that he attacked you, but you really really didn’t want it to go like that… Finally, after a few seconds, he shook his head and gave a weak chuckle, as if he couldn’t even believe it. “Hold on, let me get this straight: You’re not royalty, but you’re a criminal from another world? Did you hit your head or something?”

You knew it. He wouldn’t believe you after all.

“I mean, they keep saying this Ellis loser came from another world too… So… Maybe your story doesn’t sound too crazy after all.” His scarlet eyes focused on the floor, as if considering something. “You really weren’t lying about knowing the future. And I thought you had gone mad or something! So I’m a hero in the story?”

You could only scratch your arm nervously, a bit regretful for having to crush his sudden burst of excitement. “Ahaha… not exactly? I made that part up…”

Disappointed at the revelation that he wasn’t some badass hero wielding a legendary sword, he scoffed, “Seriously? So why save me then?”

“Look…” You took a deep breath, hiding your fidgeting fingers in your palm as best as you could. “We were both supposed to die. At least my character was mentioned in the story, but you? Y-You weren’t even mentioned at all…! You were just a nameless faceless soldier, someone not even worth mentioning––”

Offended, he snapped back, “Faceless? Rude much!”

You quickly shushed him, internally freaking out at the prospect that you may have been overheard. But when nothing else and no one else stirred, you frowned and muttered, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that, I’m just really nervous… I guess what I’m trying to get at here is… why don’t we both help each other survive?”

“What?” Shaking his head in disbelief. First this person called him someone not even worth mentioning then they ask for his help? Seriously, what was with them?

“T-Think about it…! I’m the second most powerful person in the entire kingdom…! I know what will happen! Kinda…”

“Well, I do want to live just as badly as you do…” It appeared he was still on the fence. Leaning his weight against the wall, he demanded, “But what do you mean you kinda know what will happen? I thought you, for sure, know.”

“Um…” Twiddling your fingers, you hesitantly explained the dilemma, “I did mention we were both supposed to die… And while that part isn’t a lie and the whole you being the destined one to stop Ellis was a lie, the other thing I didn’t lie about was Ellis gathering with his allies to infiltrate the palace and acquire the sword to kill the Jabberwocky. That will actually happen. S-So, since I told everyone that––”

“Let me guess, you told it early?”

Freezing, you gazed up at him and murmured, “H-How did you…?”

He shrugged, “I would’ve done the same thing if I were in your position. That means a higher chance of survival, right? Assuming that the blonde is the good guy and our king Rosehearts is the bad guy of the story. And considering all that, now you have no idea how the story will be affected, right?”

“R-Right…” Wait, now it just looked like you were useless! Immediately interjecting, you added, “But I can still make predictions based on what I know, like how things were originally supposed to play out…!”

“And you are still technically a royal…” Ace placed a finger to his chin, probably thinking about possible outcomes, upsides, and downsides if he agreed to work together. Finally, when his gaze flittered back to you and you stood upright, he questioned, “What if things don’t go how we–– you plan?”

You actually considered this briefly. If everything came crumbling down and all plans failed, there was but one last option to avoid any punishment. “Find Ellis and the White Queen… or is it the White King? I-It doesn’t matter…! The point is, the White Royal is very kind and merciful. If I go to them and explain that I am not really the Red King’s consort, then they’ll spare me…! If you come too and bring the sword to slay the Jabberwocky, that will assure them of our good intentions!”

“Isn’t that just running away? I don’t want to do that. And come on, the Whites? Are you for real? I thought us Reds were bad, but those pristine prissy little killjoys are no fun.”

For a second you wanted to strangle him. What kind of idiot would risk certain death by staying here if everything goes south, instead of fleeing to a good place that would grant you sanctuary? “It’s exactly running away, that’s the point…! The point is to stay alive!”

The redhead tilted his head to the side, his disappointed and serious behavior disappearing as he grinned. “What if I became king?”

Now it was your turn to look at him as if he were the insane one. Was this knight actually the mad hatter that had been driven insane by mercury poisoning?

“I do owe you one for saving my neck back there. And I won’t lie, I’ve dreamed about being king one day. And you, you’re actually way more ruthless than you seem at first. I thought you were a scared little wimp that always cowers behind their little hubby husband.” He mocked. Ouch. He thought you were a wimp…? “But turns out, I was so wrong about you. Sounds like you’re willing to do whatever it takes to live another day. Even turn on your own husband!”

He was whisper yelling, and it was starting to make you anxious that someone would overhear. So you whisper yelled back at a lower volume, “S-Stop that…! You know the truth, he’s not really my husband…”

That smirk made you think that he was going to respond in a louder voice, but thankfully he wasn’t that stupid. Just stupid enough to plan to overthrow the bloody Red King and talk about it in his own palace. But maybe you were stupid too, for talking about such delicate matters in the palace halls. Ace took your hands and performed a mock bow. “No running away, you got it? I’ll take that tiny red punk’s crown and become king, then I’ll keep you as a royal beside me, it’s the least I can do after what you did. We’ll both not only survive, but thrive. What do you say, Your Majesty~?”

#yandere #ace trappola #trey clover #cater diamond #riddle rosehearts #twisted wonderland #yandere twst #twst #yandere twisted wonderland #yandere twisted wonderland x reader #twst writing #work in progress #damnation twst au

[bellofthemeadow]

Dawn Ends the Night - Chapter 3

Aemond Targaryen x FemReader (Dayne)

Previous Chapter | Masterlist | Series Masterlist

Rating: M for Mature (18 + no minors allowed)

Word Count: 4.7K

Warning: All warnings on the Series Masterlist, will update if necessary (Re-iterating, no minors allowed! Thank you)

Chapter Summary: The aftermath of the attack sees Prince Aemond wrestle with new feelings.

Notes: Hello everyone, I hope you are all enjoying this chaotic posting schedule just as much as I am!!! I am back with a new chapter, a little window into Aemond's very messy mind. That man is a softboy at heart, he just needs like 20 years of therapy. RN its the beginning of a slight "obsession" as our boy for the first is feeling... something that is not murder, or hatred, or the need to burn everything with Vhagar. So yeah.

Like always thank you to everyone who reblogged and commented I love interacting with y'all and I really hope that you enjoy this chapter 💜💜💜

Taglist: @duds31 , @snh96, @lol-im-done, @heavenly1927, @whimsywilde , @queen-123s-posts

Through your Eyes

In the silence of his bedchamber, Aemond's pulse raced like the chained dragons lagering in the dragon pit, its beat echoing from the cavern of his chest to the very tips of his fingers, awakening the primal blood-rage that slept within his Targaryen blood. The air around him trembled with his ragged breaths, each one a stormy gust tearing through the otherwise stillness of the room. Alone, he wrestled with his armor, the leather stained with the day's deadly encounter. He would need to get the leather treated so the blood wouldn’t leave its reddish mark, Aemond thought with annoyance.  His hands, though shaking with a fury he struggled to contain, methodically peeled away each layer, dismissing the need for a manservant's aid. This was his ritual of solitude, after a lost fight in the yard with Ser Criston, or an annoying dinner with Aegon, Aemond needed to take a moment to confront the tempest within, a moment to try and tame the dragon. 

“My thanks for saving us” your sweet words echoed in Aemond’s brain like the hymns his mother had once insisted he memorize, trapped in his mind – relentless in their grab for his undivided attention. Although he had just met you earlier (had it only been 3 hours?) each detail was etched into his memory with unnerving clarity —the putrid stench of Flea Bottom that now seemed to permeate his very being and clung all the way to his smallclothes, the satisfying melody of the guard's screams echoes loud as he replays  the moment he severed the man's hand from his foul body; an act of true dragon-justice.  

 Your eyes. 

Those eyes, captivating and raw, rimmed with red, their watery sheen reflecting a tumult of fury and fear. It was a look Aemond rarely witnessed in others, but they were a mirror to the emotions he often grappled with in his daily solitude. Staring into his own reflection, he was accustomed to seeing the same intensity in his sole eye, the other a remnant of his past, a void where fear once dwelled. Now, that fear was often overshadowed by a simmering fury, a relentless fire that had become his constant companion. Yet, in your gaze, he saw the fear and anger, a young bird still scared of an unknown, cruel world – but oh so angry and unwilling to get yourself drag down by its cruelty.  

Since coming back to the keep after he had settled the matter at the market, Aemond’s mind was inexorably drawn back to the market, to the moment he first laid eyes on you. He had not needed anyone to point you out; he knew who you were from the second he saw you, holding that little boy who was clinging onto you like the barnacles that littered the rocks in blackwater bay.  

Seeing you so small yet standing so tall in the shadow of the guard’s golden cloak, he had only seen the resolve and desire to protect; for Aemond, it was like a visceral pull that transcended mere sight that had drawn him to you, like he was being pulled with a thight string attached to his heart.And in the dirt of Flea Bottom, you had stood cloaked in a gown of gauzy lilac in a style of dress he had never seen at court. The sheerness of the sleeves and the plunge of the loose bodice defied the strict, colorless conventions of the court and in a way that would surely raise his mother's brow in disapproval. But Aemond did not care for what was proper, as when he freed the man’s body from its hand, he only longed to take you in his arms, to press the silky fabric of your gown, under which he knew luscious curves hid, between his fingertips.  

Aemond closed his eyes trying to imagine what you would feel like in his arms, he could almost feel it if he concentrated enough - were he a bold man, Aemond would have tugged on the fabric of your dress to bring you closer to him, to hold you tight. Not for unseemly reasons as you were still his betrothed, a lady of noble birth at that, and he was no Aegon. It was hard to admit it to himself, but all he wanted was to inhale the sweet citrusy scent he had caught when you had tied the purple scrap of silk to his bicep.  

Aemond unwound the fabric from his arm with a tenderness that echoed the way his mother handled her most precious emerald necklace, an heirloom passed down from his grandmother. She cherished it so deeply that she allowed only herself to touch or clean it, guarding it like a dragon hoarding its treasure. But to Aemond, this simple piece of purple cloth was infinitely more valuable than any gems or riches that lay in the royal vault; it was the only tangible thread linking him to you. Through this favor, you were his and he was yours, bonded through blood and silk. He hoped one day he could shower you in trinkets; ruby-red necklaces, perhaps paired with a green samite gown, or freshwater pearls jewelery ; he had heard that Riverrun made amazing hairnet with them  –Aemond could not help but smile at the thought of you outfitted with tokens from him, all would know that you belonged to him.  

Aemond let the fabric dance lightly between his fingertips and bringing the scarf closer, he tentatively pressed it against his nose, inhaling deeply. The fragrance was faint, a hint of your presence as if you had only briefly held the fabric in your grasp. Frustration flickered within him as he sought more of your scent, breathing in with an intensity born of deep longing and desire. Aemond was no stranger to yearning; his life was a testament to insatiable hunger - for recognition, for greatness, for respect, and for the Iron Throne. His brother, with his lecherous appetite and penchant for debauchery, and his older sister who is always entangled in a web of deceit with her brood of Strong bastards, were both underserving of what should have been rightfully Aemond.  

Yet, as he held the fabric close to his face, Aemond felt his greed transform from ugly and covetous to an all-encompassing desire to protect and care. He yearned not for accolades or crowns, but for the intimacy of your existence in his arms. Indeed, Aemond was a greedy man, and at that moment, he longed to truly have you, to have your scent permeate his skin. The mere thought of burying his face in your hair, drawing in the essence of your being, became a need that tugged at his very core. He almost scoffed at his thoughts, to think that the dragonrider of Vhagar would be reduced to a puddle of quivering emotions! If, when his mother first informed him of his betrothal, Aegon had told him that in barely a moon's turn he would desire nothing more than the simple pleasure of his betrothed's closeness, to breathe in the sweet aroma, he would have throttled his idiot brother. But you had ensnared him – a simple instant in your presence, a look from your beautiful eyes and he was yours. What a mess he was.  

Closing his eyes, Aemond did his best to recall the delicate touch of your hands as they had wrapped the fabric around his arm. The feeling of your delicate fingers resonated deep within him, intimate and gentle, unlike any he had ever experienced. The soft pressure of your fingers against his skin, the careful way you secured the scarf, it all felt like a silent promise, I shall care for you, my lord husbands. Words Aemond yearned to hear falling from your plush lips.  

Under the tender scrutiny of your eyes, Aemond felt a man transformed; Gone was the bitter sting of being known as 'Aemond the Dragonless' or 'Aemond-who-sends-the-maids-crying.' Instead, he felt seen as who he should have been, had fate not cruelly snatched away his eye – a true dragon prince, deserving of admiration and respect. Deserving of a crown, even if his weak father refused to admit it.  

"Prince Aemond!" The call from Ser Criston echoed forcefully through the door, breaking the stillness of the chamber and brought Aemond from his musings. Huffing, Aemond groaned in displeasure, he could understand now why Aegon stopped his sword training - Ser Criston did have the worst of timing. Maybe if he held his breath, Ser Criston would go away. He waited a minute, but the pounding restarted; Of course, he would not go away, the knight was relentless.  

"Just a moment," Aemond replied tersely.  

"The Queen requests your presence immediately, my prince. The matter is urgent, so please make haste my prince" came Ser Criston's insistent voice from the other side. 

Aemond groaned before swiftly splashing cool water across his face, feeling it's refreshing touch against his skin and hastily pulling a tunic over his head, covering his bare chest. There would be time for a proper bath later in the evening, before dinner and the official presentation of his betrothed to court, he reasoned. 

His fingers then reached for the purple silk and carefully he tied it around his wrist, positioning it high enough to remain concealed beneath the folds of his jerkin. Though hidden from view, its presence was a secret comfort, a reminder that he did not dream you – that you existed, in flesh and blood.  

Aemond flung the door open, his movements brusque, revealing the stern figure of Ser Criston Cole. The knight looked annoyed; his lips downturned in displeasure. Without exchanging words, Aemond began striding towards his mother’s solar, the path so familiar that he required no guidance, least of all from his mother’s shadow. 

"The Queen is quite agitated, my prince," Ser Criston broke the silence, his voice echoing down the dimly lit corridor. "She has been informed of the incident at the market and is... less than pleased." 

Aemond's steps faltered, his fists clenching at his sides, he knew it was coming, he just had not imagined it would happen so soon, although it made sense as Alicent had many eyes and ears all over the city. Aemond looked at Ser Criston before rolling his eye, the knight had no doubt babbled the second he had reached his mother's vicinity. The thought of disappointing his mother tightly squeezed at his heart, with gritted teeth, Aemond let out a noncommittal grunt in a thinly veiled effort to maintain composure. Ser Criston, however, persisted. "In light of the current tensions at court, such a public display of violence was... ill-advised, to say the least. For a prince of the realm to act so rashly..." 

Stopping abruptly, the torchlight casting long shadows that danced on the walls, Aemond turned sharply, his eyes a stormy sea of frustration and barely contained rage. "And what would you have had me do, Ser Criston? Stand by while that animal threatened my betrothed with cold steel? Be grateful I let him leave with his life." 

Ser Criston's demeanor remained stoic, attempting to soothe the prince's anger. "These are indeed trying times, my prince. But your betrothed should not have found herself in such a predicament. A lady of her station venturing away from her escort raises questions about her discretion. Such behavior could bring unforeseen troubles to our doorstep..." 

Aemond's voice cut through the air, sharp as Valyrian steel. "I severed the hand that dared harm her. What do you think I would do to the tongues of those who dare tarnish her name?" 

Ser Criston's expression flickered, a brief moment of uncertainty crossing his face. "My prince, I did not mean to imply—" 

"I know exactly what you implied," Aemond interjected, his voice laced with a cold venom. He unconsciously reached to his right arm where he knew your favor was hidden, touching it to bring your bravery to his words. "Remember your place, Ser Criston. As much as you are a valued member of this household and as much as I have always considered you to be a great mentor, I will not tolerate any slight against my betrothed. Is that clear?" 

"Yes, my prince," Ser Criston conceded, the strain in his voice evident. "I shall be more mindful." 

With a curt nod, Aemond turned away and, as he moved through the corridors, passing servants and knights alike, he noticed their efforts to avoid meeting his gaze. It was a dance he had grown accustomed to, yet today, it felt more pronounced as it made the hole beneath the eye-patch throbbed. Trying to keep the pain at bay, he imagined you at his side holding his hand and giving a sweet reassuring smile. It seemed to help somewhat as the pain started subsiding, leaving in its wake only the feeling of emptiness. It would do for now.  

 Reaching the door to the Queen's solar, Aemond paused, collecting his thoughts. He had hoped that by now, his usual icy composure would have resettled over him like a familiar cloak, that the fiery dragon within would have been tamed and subdued. Yet, beneath his skin, a prickling heat lingered, a reminder of the inferno that had coursed through his veins earlier. Taking a deep breath, he steeled himself for the encounter ahead. The comforting memory of your grateful eyes had to be set aside, replaced with the bracing reality of his mother's scrutiny. 

Aemond gently rapped on the door and after a brief pause, one of his mother's handmaidens opened the door, allowing him and Ser Criston to enter the room. Inside, Queen Alicent, adorned in a dress of her usual striking green, paced before a large window. Her anxiety was palpable, evidenced by the way she gnawed at her cuticles, some of which were surrounded by tiny specks of blood where she had bitten too deeply.  

Aemond felt a pang of shame tighten in his gut. He was rather unaccustomed to being the source of his mother's disappointment. Throughout his life, she had always shown him a particular kind of attention, especially during his more vulnerable, bullied childhood years when he did not have a dragon to stop people (Aegon) from mocking him. Displeasing Queen Alicent was not something he took lightly. His gaze swept across the room, and Aemond noticed the unusual absence of Otto Hightower, which was odd as the man always had a way to immerse himself in every family discussion. 

Aemond's thoughts were shattered by the sharp rebuke of his mother. "Aemond, for the love of the Seven, what possessed you?" Queen Alicent's voice might have sounded stern and strict to the uneased ear, but Aemond could hear a pinch of desperation. "To attack and dismember a gold cloak in full view of the public. Do you realize the talk this will incite!?" Her eyes, usually so full of maternal warmth reserved for him, now bore into him with a sternness that made him inwardly flinch. 

The smoldering embers of Aemond's anger flared up once more, and he met his mother's gaze with his own steely look – the one that made grown man shudder. "Mother, that man was a disgrace to his cloak. He was assaulting the woman who is to be my wife, threatening her life. He was a beast, unworthy of his position and of the gold on his back. By intervening, I not only did what was necessary to protect my intended, but I restored the name of the King in the eyes of the people of King’s Landing. I will not apologize for my actions as I was under the impression that Lady Dayne, being betrothed to a prince, would be under the protection of our house. It seems I was mistaken. Perhaps I should have allowed her to be stripped naked and beaten for all of Flea bottom to see, would this have been more appropriate?!" 

Queen Alicent, her fingers once again finding their way to her mouth, bit her nails nervously. With a weary sigh, she approached Aemond, her hands reaching out to gently grasp his arms. "Aemond, you misunderstand my concern," she began, her voice tinged with fatigue. "Your actions in defending your betrothed were commendable, but the manner in which you executed them... it is the brutality of it that troubles me. Such a display of violence and cruelty, it's not befitting a prince of your stature." 

Aemond's response came with a touch of bitterness, "Mother, the people of King’s Landing have always viewed me as a monster. What I did today is likely mild in comparison to what they all believe me capable of. And frankly, the man got off lightly. Had it been solely up to me, I would have fed him to Vhagar without a second thought." 

Queen Alicent's sigh was heavy. "Aemond, please," she implored. "I understand your urge to protect your future wife, but you have not even properly met her, your reaction was..." 

"You understand nothing," Aemond interjected sharply, his voice rising with indignation. "My name is Aemond Targaryen! NOT Aemond Hightower and I will uphold the words of my house, 'Fire and Blood,' in dealing with any who threaten us. And that includes Lady Dayne, from the moment Ggrandfather arranged for our betrothal. " 

Alicent's expression turned grave, her gaze unyielding "Is that truly your desire, Aemond? To be remembered as another Maegor the Cruel? To walk the same dark path as your uncle, the rogue that all the nobility of the realm scorns? What legacy do you wish to leave – Aemond the Monstrous? Aemond the Brutal?" 

Aemond winced upon his mother's words – Aemond the monstruous? A bitter retort escaped his lips, "Perhaps I do want that. Perhaps if they called me 'Aemond the Cruel' openly as they all think it, my dear older sister would reconsider herself, parading her bastards as if they were legitimate heirs, worthy of the throne." 

Queen Alicent took a deep, steadying breath, her eyes closing momentarily in a silent plea for patience. She released Aemond's arms, turning away from him, her posture one of weary resignation. "I only wish that you would remember the lessons of mercy taught by the Mother," she said softly. "I understand your anger, Aemond, but you must see that there are alternatives to your actions. Violence, war, death – these are not the sole answers to all our difficulties." 

Aemond felt sour upon his mother’s words, had she always been so blind? "And what would be the 'appropriate' answer, mother, when Rhaenyra learns of your plans with Grandfather? When she discovers your intention to crown Aegon over her?" 

"Aemond, please," Alicent implored, but he pressed on relentlessly. 

"Do you truly believe she will simply just accept it? Do you not see that war and violence are already at our doorstep? Is this not why you arranged my marriage to Lady Dayne – to secure Dorne's support when conflict inevitably breaks out? Consider how our position would weaken if I had allowed the first Dornish lady on our soil since the conquest to be abused on the streets of King's Landing. Prince Quoren might have renounced our alliance entirely. And then what, Mother? Whom would you have me marry? A distant Beesbury cousin? Perhaps some lesser Velaryon to challenge Lord Corlys? What would your grand strategy be, mother?" 

Alicent remained silent, her figure still and composed, even as the tension in the room thickened. Aemond felt like a snarling dragon, spewing fire at the calm and poised figure of his mother – but a dragon could burn down a tower if needed. From his vantage point in the corner, Ser Criston, who had been observing the exchange in silence, finally spoke up, his voice stern. "Prince or not, you will show the proper respect when addressing the Queen." 

Alicent's voice was calm, final. "It is alright, Ser Criston. My son is evidently still distressed from today's events. You may leave us, Aemond." She did not turn back to look at Aemond, her gaze fixed somewhere distant. 

"Mother," Aemond uttered, the anger was still there, but a deep feeling of regret was starting to tightnened in his troath – he had never spoken to his mother this. Had always revered her as the woman who had always loved him, would always love and cherish him, eyes or no eyes. The woman who had taken his side on Driftmark, who had been willing to draw blood for him. So why was he so angry? Because you know of another woman who would have taken your side on Driftmark now, a smooth voice whispered in his mind. He could imagine Lady Dayne, except instead of the little street urchin clinging to you, it was him – holding you as you were soothing him and urling insults to the Strong. Nevertheless, although Aemond knew he had won the argument, the victory was hollow and left a bitter taste in his mouth.  

As Aemond stormed out of his mother's solar, the door slammed shut with a force that was quite petulant and wholly unbefitting of his princely demeanor. The urge to visit Vhagar tugged at him; her presence, the soothing texture of her scales, and the smoldering depths of her yellow eyes often brought him solace in tumultuous times. Soaring through the skies on her back, he found unparalleled freedom, a sense of true self that grounded him amidst the chaos of court life. But today, his steps wavered, his usual path to where Vhagar rested, momentarily forgotten. 

A different impulse guided him instead, steering his course through the corridors of the castle. He caught sight of a maid, her steps quick and purposeful towards the kitchens. In a swift motion, Aemond reached out, his hand gently but firmly grasping her arm. His voice, though laced with the lingering storm of his recent encounter, carried a softer edge. "Tell me, where in the castle is the Dayne retinue lodging?" 

The maid, attempting to maintain her composure, did everything to avoid the intense gaze of his solitary eye, stuttered her reply. "In... the west wing, my prince," she managed, her voice barely above a whisper. With a nod of acknowledgement, Aemond released her, his mind now set on a new destination. 

Navigating the labyrinth of corridors towards the West wing, Prince Aemond was in a whirlwind as each step he took was shadowed by uncertainty - would you be there in your quarters? And if so, would you welcome his presence? He wondered if the radiant spark that had lit your eyes earlier, the one that had captivated him so completely, would still shine when faced with him alone. Doubt nagged at him, whispering questions of whether you might prefer solitude over his company. He shook his head, none of it mattered; the second-guessing, the fear. He needed to see you, to lay eyes on you and ensure your well-being. These thoughts propelled him towards your quarters, and he felt more like a dragon than ever before, like a great beast tracking its prey before feasting – unrelenting, with a singular purpose. You.  

As Prince Aemond neared the West wing, he was met with a contingent of guards adorned with the Dayne sigil – a white fallen star against a field of lilac. A frown marred his features. Where had these men been when you needed them most? "I wish to see my betrothed." Aemond’s tone left no place for arguments. 

However, one of the guards, an older man with a graying beard and sharp brown eyes, appeared unmoved by Aemond's royal status and instead eyed the prince distrustfully. "The lady is currently resting after a taxing day... My prince" The last part was definitely added as an afterthought. 

Bastard, Aemond thought angrily, did he not know he was speaking to a prince? How dare this commoner (who had let harm come to you) come between him and his need to see you! Aemond's sneer was barely concealed. "I'm well aware of her trying day, as I was present," he retorted, trying to quell the anger that pulsed in his veins. "Is it a Dornish custom then, that betrothed couples cannot converse? Especially after one of the party saved the other. Quite a peculiar custom if you ask me." 

Another younger guard grumbled “Not as much as fucking your siblings...” If Aemond was not so consumed with thoughts of you, he would have had whipped this guard for the insolence.  

The older guard's expression soured further, his eyes narrowing. "Given today’s events, where one of your men assaulted our lady, you'll understand my prince,” definitely a sneer” “Our caution.”  

"And the man responsible has been dealt with," Aemond countered firmly, his gaze unwavering. 

The standoff continued for a tense moment before the older guard relented under Aemond's intense gaze. For once, Aemond was quite satisfied that his one eye could make even the fiercest of men grow uncomfortable, it helped to get his bidding done. The guard led the prince to a corner door and knocked briskly. "My lady, Prince Aemond is here to see you," he announced. 

The response came in the form of your familiar, melodious voice, which had haunted Aemond's thoughts throughout the day. "Come in!" you called out, and Aemond felt a mixture of relief and apprehension as he prepared to enter. 

Upon opening the room, Aemond was met with a scene quite unexpected. There you were, center stage in the spacious chamber, having exchanged your earlier attire for a strikingly different ensemble. You were adorned in a long, elegant purple tunic with short sleeves that left your arms gracefully exposed. Underneath, a pair of voluminous white breeches reached down to your calves, leaving the lower parts of your legs exposed. Aemond gulped loudly at the sight of you, he had never seen a young lady dressed in such a manner. Were all Dornish ladies such beautiful women, who scorned proper attire? Were all Dornish ladies so... enticing? No, Aemond thought decidedly, you must be one of a kind, a lone bright star in the otherwise dark skies of his life.  

Yet, it was the action before him that truly caught him off guard. You were in the midst of a tussle with the same young boy from earlier - Daven, was it? You were attempting to apply soap to his hair, a task he seemed to be resisting with all the vigor a 5-year-old boy could muster. On the large bed nearby, another boy of a similar age sat, munching on a bright red apple, his eyes wide with fascination as he observed the struggle. 

“My Lady... Am I... Bothering you? Aemond muttered, at a lost feeling like he might be intruding on such a strange, yet merry moment.”  

Your smile bloomed like a desert rose at dawn, eyes sparkling with the kind of joy that one might associate with discovering a long-lost treasure, or seeing a long-lost friend... Or lover. Gently, you shifted the still-pouting boy in your arms to face Aemond, calling to him with a warmth that melted the icy barriers around the prince's heart. "Look, Davos! Our brave prince who saved us earlier has come to see us!" The boy, Davos, offered a shy smile and a timid wave, his earlier resistance forgotten in the presence of his hero. 

Aemond felt an unfamiliar flush of warmth spread across his cheeks under your gaze, filled with gratitude and something deeper, something that seemed to stir the very core of his being. The usual fire that raged within him, driving his every ambition and desire, seemed to simmer down into a comforting warmth, a feeling he couldn't quite place but didn't wish to escape. 

His heart pounding a rapid rhythm, Aemond offered a slight bow. "Might I be of assistance, my Lady?" 

Your response came with an infectious beam. "Another pair of hands would be most welcome." 

Positioning himself to be of help, Aemond muttered, "Guide me to where I can be most useful, my Lady." 

With a soft and tender smile, you replied, "I believe, my prince, that you are perfect just where you are." 

Perfect right where he is?  

Aemond would never leave your side, nothing would ever tear from you and you from him. The Gods had always scorned him since his childhood, this was payment. His due. You were his and he was yours from this day until the end of his days.  

Next chapter

#aemond targaryen x reader #aemond targaryen x you #aemond targaryen #prince aemond #aemond one eye #aemond targaryen x ofc #aemond targaryen x oc #aemond x fem!reader #aemond x you #aemond x reader #aemond x oc #aemond targaryen x fem!oc #fanfic #fanfiction #hotd fanfic #hotd #hotd aemond #aemond fanfiction #aemond fic #ewan nation #ewan mitchell #ewanverse #alicent hightower #criston cole #aemond targaryen x female reader #aemond angst

[wannawritefast]

Poise

A/N: Here she is. Seriously Aro is wicked fun to write and as I told Vas (@vasiktomis) reader/MC kinda ripped the reins from my hands. Is she (as in reader/MC) a lil coo coo bananas? Yes. Did she stretch my abilities as a writer? Yes. Were there times that I agonized over a singular word choice for an embarrassing amount of time? Oh yes. A lot of firsts in this fic for me as a writer. Very proud of myself. Thanks for reading. Also I'm so unserious about Aro. No funky aesthetic gif for this one. He's simply too silly. I also post all my stuff on both Tumblr and AO3. Same handle!

Pairing: Aro Volturi x F!Reader

Words: 6.6k

Warnings: gore (consider yourself warned), implied intimate partner abuse in flashbacks, death (no major characters), arachnophobia, reader has powers having to do with nightmares and is crazy, so is Aro, it’s the Volturi you kinda know what you’re getting into

Summary: After taking matters into your own hands, you swear never to be weak a day in the rest of your eternity. The Volturi can help with that.

“What I am left wondering is why you have suddenly found yourself in want of membership to the Volturi. You denied us quite emphatically those many years ago.”

“I was under a year into my immortality, Caius. You must forgive the blunders of my youth.”

Indeed, that many years ago you had declined their invitation. But that was when you still had your youthful fire about you. In so many years you had traded it in for temperance.

Still Caius narrowed his eyes from the platform. Only two of those splendiferous thrones were occupied at the moment -- a naked helm. Heidi had assured you that Aro was well on his way. That had been 3 minutes ago when Caius had decided to put you on trial for no other reason than him not being present.

Marcus watched on with those ancient eyes. They must have always looked old, you thought to yourself. You couldn’t imagine Marcus’ eyes looking any younger than time itself. And Caius’ eyes -- well… Very well. You’d let him enjoy this silly little power trip. There was something of a cruel smile lifting the edge of his lip.

“I have the time to hold a grudge.”

“Have you nothing better to do with eternity than harbor petty anger? My, my, you truly do not play well with others.” Your eyes drifted to Marcus. “Have you nothing to say, old friend?”

“We are hardly old friends.”

You rolled your eyes, settling your attention back to Caius. “If you’ll excuse me, I shall speak no more until Aro arrives.”

“Why? Are you frightened?” He taunted. Bait, that’s all it was…

“Are you?”

The doors behind you swung open heavily, like a final breath. Four sets of heeled shoes struck the marble. You did not turn even as Jane and Alec walked close on either side of you, like eels as they glided up the platform standing in the background.

Heidi didn’t even so much as brush past you to go out a side door. It was an unusual occurrence to demand entrance into the Volturi especially when a previous invitation had been so rudely turned down. You were certain a number of the vampires along the walls with you were there simply to see what demise would befall you for such insolence.

The fourth set of boots slowly walked up to the direct back of you. There was no body heat to speak for Aro but you knew it was him. The eyes of all the people in the room suddenly on you could not mean anything else. 

“Did you receive a warm welcome?” His voice hit the back of your head and it was no louder than a lover whispering their intentions.

You straightened, your eyes piercing Caius where he stood. “Something like that.”

Aro finished the pace around you. “You are very brave to have come here.” His eyes scanned the walls. He was looking to see if it was true that you had come alone.

“I was hoping it might be rewarded.”

“Hope…” He tasted the word. “Now that’s a word I have not heard in a good while.”

Half of a smile spread across your face. “You’re welcome.”

“Hm.” Aro looked you up and down, amused, before continuing his path to his throne. The three men on the platform finally sat. “And I… well, perhaps I should not assume a thing. Why don’t you tell me why you are here?”

The blonde vampire stole the silence from you. You couldn’t help but think that the angelic color was wasted on him. He would be blonde. “Foolish girl, she’s changed her mind!”

“Caius, I did ask her to tell, did I not?” Aro only dignified the man with a slight turn of his head. He set his jaw and sunk back into his throne a little. Aro’s hand gestured for you to continue.

“It is true,” you responded. As much as it pained you to soothe Caius’ temper via agreeability you were not above it especially now. “I would like to petition for entry to the Volturi.”

The laugh of all the vampires in the room made it all the more funny, you supposed. Even Marcus’ perpetually morose eyes tilted up as he chuckled.

Aro only smiled. “Now my dear…”

“I am aware of my past petulence-”

“Ooh, that was not petulence,” he corrected you, leaning forward. “Petulence is far too generous. You were rude.”

You gulped. It was true. You had been rude those 200 years ago. Very rude. 

Aro continued. “I believe you said… what were the words you used…?”

Marcus cleared his throat. “Allow me. ‘The Volturi are a semblance of order. Their actions are a colossal mimicry of law and the leaders are just as big of fools for as long as they stand if they believe that their offers of entry are anything more than an identification of spinelessness in the subject if they accept such a thing.’” Curse him for his memory. “Something like that.”

His really good memory.

The helmsman of the Volturi raised his brows at that. “Your recollection is pristine, Marcus. My goodness, such scathing words… I had forgotten.”

“‘Go to hell, you greedy fucks’ too,” Caius added, that hint of a cruel smile earlier was now a complete grin. “Can’t forget that either.”

“That last one was not me actually.” A glower from the blonde vampire. “My sire, rest his soul-” I hope he is eternally suffering, “-should be properly credited for that.”

There was a chuckle from all three on the platform, even Jane smiled a little. Although it was better than how you had begun it still was not a good sign.

“Yes, rest his soul.” Aro tilted his chin up. “Whatever did happen to him?”

A test. Aro knew what had happened. Everyone in the room knew what had happened. Or they knew a version. “My coven at the time… handled him and went our separate ways.”

It was not a lie. 

“Yes, I suppose you did handle it.” Aro remarked. “It was startling to hear about, just like that, ripped limb from limb by your coven.” He didn’t trust you. Why would he?

You swept up the steps before him and wordlessly knelt, reaching a hand up. A young woman reaching her hand up to a young man, both centuries old. Jane and Alec stepped forward in warning, flanking Aro’s throne. Your eyes flitted between them. An impasse. Still you kept your hand outstretched to Aro who had taken a small step forward in your approach. Your eyes landed back on him. Please.

Aro regarded you coolly; it was colored by something else though. Intrigue. Curiosity. Hunger. The last time Aro had read you had been 200 years ago; you had so much less control then. You remembered him snatching his hands away from yours as your nightmares, or rather his, had sloppily tumbled toward him while he flitted through your memory. Two horrible truths slamming into one another -- a mutual bruise, the two of you. Your talents were similar, all thing considered.

“You can look,” you whispered up at him. “I am better at this now.”

Something of a warm smile dawned on him, if indeed Aro could ever be described as warm, as he crouched down. His red, milky eyes bore into yours and then, gently, one of his hands tucked under your palm and the other covered your knuckles. You bridled the lightning fast nightmares as the man pushed forward.

Just like the first time it had happened, it felt like nothing more than the pad of a thumb releasing held pages as they rushed for the cover of a book. Aro flicked through two centuries of life in ten seconds, his eyes darting between yours as he passively consumed.

The story had to begin with the truth that covens did not turn on each other. In technicality it was not that it had turned on itself -- just all against the self-declared leader who held all of you in a vice-like grip. You refused to even give him his name in your memory, yet another way to kill him back in a way that truly mattered. 

His inclinations of you showing abilities upon your turning were unfortunately well-guessed. You cursed your sire for the rest of your days for his early but ultimately rare stroke of clairvoyance. With time you would learn that he was no stranger to fear as a weapon either. 

Aro pushed forward, unreadably neutral. The memory of the first time you ever used your abilities somersaulted through your consciousness. You had gone well beyond the bounds of the perimeter that had been set for you by your captor. It was direct disobedience to your sire’s orders and the vampire passing through never saw it coming. The spooking they had done you was a complete accident. Their intentions to take the human body you were feeding on, however, were undeniably loaded with malice.

You had only intended to shoot them a glare but something about the tense moment, about them approaching you with a hand reaching out to what was in yours… that’s what started it. You heard it first, an impossibly low thunder like something far beneath the earth pushing its way up; they heard it too. Your crouch was something feral when you did it and the nightmares that crashed into that poor vampire tumbled into your mind too. To that though you were a spectator, privy to the innermost workings of what horrified that particular individual.

Tense shoulders, a talon-like grip taking control of your hands, a furrowed brow. Your eyes snapped shut; while the nightmares were never your personal bane they hardly offered any comfort. You saw it all. It would be the first of many in the coming eternity. 

Their shrinking hands slashing and clawing through phantom blood, unable to cup it, unable to consume any of it in a vicious bout of craving. Frantically pressing themselves into the ground as the endless blood on the ground began draining into the soil. They were withering by the second. It didn’t matter to the vampire that it was utterly ridiculous.

The vampire before you, the real version, collapsed to the ground; you heard it, like a snare cutting through reverberating bass. You didn’t open your eyes until their breath came out in pants, as if they were suffocating on too much air. And it stopped. Just like that. An end to the focus ending their nightmare. 

Aro cocked his head, continuing to read you. In hindsight, you wished you had cut and run right then. You would have had a head start. Your sire wouldn’t have caught you in the few moments he had made the mistake of leaving you alone. From that moment on, he forced you to be at his side. You remembered the berating you had gotten for your disobedience that followed after his wide-eyed realization that you could do what you had done to the weeping vampire.

With that, you became the prize of the coven; it was your abilities that afforded your sire his longevity. He made you play with his food sometimes; asking what you saw as you screwed your eyes shut. You told yourself it was from the effort. In truth it was not any harder than flicking down a wooden block had been in your mortal youth. 

No, you strained with the wretched knowledge that the only thing you really had a knack for was holding out a mirror. The beastly things you saw -- what frightened the most deplorable of individuals. It was sick; in every horrid vision you churned out, you saw the inner workings of the mind, of the filthy things that these monsters had done in their conscious lives. The worst thing about your abilities was that the most frequent nightmare you bore witness to was them getting what they had deserved. Revenge. Balance. Order. Justice.

It was true. Yours and Aro’s gifts weren’t really that different. You saw a lot, possibly too much of whoever had the poor luck of encountering your proficiencies.

And, oh, how your sire had loved your gift. It was precious, he said. You recalled a time he had even called it artistry. It was after you used it, after you saw the depravity of human and vampire kind that he cradled your head between his heavy hands. You learned to savor the moments where he wasn’t throwing them around. And during those times when you deeply pleased him by what you were able to do, you saw him bloat with the intoxication of power. It would be many years until you really used your gift but it took little guesswork to know then what he feared: the loss of control -- the loss of you. Motivated by pride he kept turning others, stopping at the fifth of your covenmates when he realized that he had really only lucked out on his first try -- also, you.

That was when you had been initially approached. Your sire had never once received so much as a greeting from the Volturi; he never let you forget how bitter it made him. Unfortunately, his hold on you also included passing down his opinion. By the time the Volturi got to you, you had been spoiled against them. Only time would truly tell whether you would be forgiven for it.

At this moment, though his red eyes were set on you, Aro wasn’t really looking though -- not the present-you anyways. It was subtle, the way his brows and lips fluttered up and down as if fighting his own desire to respond. His expression sobered briefly.

You had spent centuries with the man, your sire… he was brutal. Even you were not immune to his rage. Each of your covenmates were strong in their own rights but none of you were singularly stronger than him. The Volturi’s arrival and immediate departure was one of the worst days of your life. You remembered holding one of your sisters, the sixth, the youngest, after it all. She begged you to stay and endure with her. And for two hundred years the two of you, all of you kept that promise to each other.

It had been one too many cruel moments when the dam broke. It was the moment that all of you realized that while you were too individually weak, he couldn’t handle all of you. You did the honors of the inaugural blow -- undoing him with nightmares of his own demise as it came to fruition. It was the only time in all of your years of using your abilities that you hadn’t clenched your eyes shut and shrunk away. No, that time… that time you had leaned forward, eyes unblinking as you watched him writhe in fear before what was left of him was instead writhing in pain. It was easy, like dropping a heavy bucket with little care of what happened to its contents. 

As Aro dug, it was only then that you realized you smiled when you’d done it. It was funny, you supposed, that your sire’s worst fear had come to pass right as it transpired just moments before in his mind. The six of you, your five covenmates and yourself, tore him to shreds. No blood that you had tasted or would ever taste compared to the delicious freedom of his eternal rest. He died, truly died, afraid. He deserved worse.

It was short-lived though. After centuries of subjugation, the sudden freedom was a blessing and a curse and not a single one of you could really agree on what to do except to leave. It was devastating in the same way you would see the final struggle of a living thing fighting off its final moments before succumbing; they were certainly in a better place. Two of them went on their own. The other three traveled together elsewhere. At the end of it you found yourself alone and not wanting to be weak again a day in your life.

While the rebellion had been justified, it was an overthrow of power, something especially dangerous in the halls of Volterra and you had been the ring leader. After all, you were the only one in the group with a talent.

Aro rose to his feet, gently tugging you up with him. “Now that does complicate the narrative, doesn’t it…”

Your eyes flickered to Caius who was in turn staring him down. “Oh, come off it, Aro. You are not honestly considering letting her in.” He stalked up to where the two of you were standing. You looked up at both of the men, still a step below. “The Volturi do not give second chances!”

“If I may, I am not asking for a second chance.” Bold… This was bold of you… “I am petitioning for membership on the grounds that it was offered once before. Your opinions of me have not changed since the initial offer.”

“Yes, they have.” Caius spat.

“Mine haven’t,” Aro confirmed. “Although I wouldn’t be so sure that is a good thing.”

Bright red eyes bore down as you finally pulled your hand from his grasp. His fingertips brushed along your knuckles before his hands lowered in kind. Him looking through your mind just moments prior felt less invasive. You directed your attention instead to the less intense of the two.

“We should have killed you the second you walked in here.”

Very well. “If it is an apology you want I will give it.” Your eyes were locked on Caius, pure impudence meeting unbridled sadism. You knew it drove him crazy.

“Foolish girl-!”

“I am sorry!” You snapped at him. The words came out more like ‘shut up.’ They were just as effective though. Caius stood silent although the sneer was still on his face. Of course that would do it for him. You knew it. It was disgusting. Oh, how he loved seeing people grovel. The hate in that man’s heart…

You suddenly remembered yourself. Aro had seen that -- your distaste for Caius, your willingness to do anything to be a member of the Volturi, your deep regret that your sire had influenced you to be so brash. That was one of the worst things your sire ever did: convincing you that his opinions were yours.

“I will repeat to you what I said to you earlier. Forgive me for the insolence of my early days. It was unwise of me to have behaved in such a way… and-” You were practically choking on your apology, uselessly panting with the effort. Admittance that you were wrong had a bad mouthfeel, especially after decades being forced to do it. “-and I was wrong about all of it. Consider me corrected.”

If Caius had been biting back any of his cruel amusement before, he certainly wasn’t hiding it now. Marcus was now standing closer having meandered nearer during the course of the apology. And Aro… Aro had the most curious of soft smiles on his face. 

You were beginning to think you had made some kind of mistake coming here. You had laid almost all your cards bare. You had shown them you were desperate which was far worse than just being desperate. This was something you were going to have to amend for a good while if they accepted you. That you begged to be let in.

“I am satisfied,” Caius remarked, eyes settling on Aro. They were standing over you, all three of them. 

Some days ago you had come across a rat moments before it was devoured by three street dogs in an alleyway on your journey to Volterra. It must have looked like something like this to that rather unfortunate vermin, you thought to yourself.

Your head dropped in complete and utter humility, eyes only on the marble underfoot. Even the pristine stone was too good for you… You had been at the mercy of the three men before you since you set foot in this dreadful place. It was only at that premature moment you still had an ounce of pride in your body. It was far gone now.

“Marcus?”

“I am satisfied.”

“As am I.” Cold smooth fingers tucked under your chin. Aro’s. You must have looked something pitiful. “And this-” Aro tutted at you, lifting your face up. “-we will work on this.”

The gesture might have been kind, intimate even, if it was anyone but Aro. You didn’t really trust him as far as you could throw him but you knew enough in having seen his nightmares many years ago that he would not tolerate an ounce of self-deprecation in a vampire beyond paying their due respects to the Volturi, to him. He had seen quite enough from you. That much was true.

“Yes… sir?” You tested the title. You weren’t quite sure what to refer to him as.

Aro’s face took on something of a delighted expression. “Look at you using your manners. See, Caius; she learns.” The blonde vampire rolled his eyes. “I do appreciate it but ‘Aro’ will do just fine.”

Ah. Well, that was embarrassing. You nodded affirmatively. Marcus’ eyes flicked from Aro to you and back before he returned to his seat. Out of the corner of your eye you saw Jane smile something wicked.

“We shall get you new attire, especially now that you will be joining the guard after some fine-tuning, but there’s no sense in putting you in anything of the sort since we’re coming up on-” The side doors swung open and Heidi led in a group of tourists who were guffawing at the ceiling. Aro’s hands flew up like a child prince being brought an expensive present. In a sense, it was -- “-dinnertime!”

Oh, so this was how they fed. Aro steered you to the side and behind him with a hand clamped around your upper arm. Heidi sidled up to you.

“Welcome to the Volturi.”

“How did you know?”

“You are still in one piece.” Fair. 

Aro leaned over to you. “Now, next time you will join your compatriots along the wall but tonight we will make an exception -- something of a welcome gift…” He extended his arm to the group of mortals before you who were clicking pictures of the room. Like fish in a bucket… or however the expression went.

You raised a brow at him. 

“You first, my dear.”

A vampire along the wall by the name of Felix bobbed on his feet, antsy. You smiled and launched off the platform for the human before you. The both of you rolled together as you slammed him into the ground. Only his limbs flailed clumsily. Yours had been a vision of centuries of practice. A trained killer.

You bared your teeth. He screamed. Humans… 

Wandering aimlessly about the grounds, such expansive ones at that and with such independence, was novel to you. You weren’t entirely sure what to do with yourself; it was beautiful. Just months ago you had been sequestered to your corner of the world, never to go beyond a painfully small perimeter. And now here you were… surrounded by the most powerful of your kind. Nearly unrestricted access to the grounds. New clothes. Fresh blood, not whatever your sire didn’t finish. Eyes never black with hunger. The respect you got as a tentative member of the Volturi guard. It was new.

And the Italian air. Sure, you didn’t really need to breathe at all. There wasn’t a function to smelling it. But the air… The breeze in Volterra was something fresh, warm, earthy, sweet, like blood. It was even more perfumy at night.

Something about the years of being on edge, even as an immortal, still ran through your veins, through the very way you functioned. Even in your most relaxed moments, you could recognize when you were being followed. And someone was following you.

You stopped in your tracks, only peering over your shoulder.

A fraction of you thought to yourself -- how odd… Aro should’ve been better at this. Then you realized two things. The first was that if Aro was truly aiming for discretion in whatever he was about to do, there was no reason for it to be him here and now. The second was that it was also entirely possible that Aro simply didn’t care that you knew he was there… or, in fact, did want you to know. Your curiosity was a helpless one; you must’ve looked like a cat.

“I was wondering when you were going to catch on.”

Only the trees in the garden obscured him from you, not the darkness. “How did I do?”

Silence as he rounded the corner. Black suit. Red eyes. Dark hair slicked back. You let him approach until he was a pace away, slowly continuing. “Ten seconds before you caught me… there are a good many vampires who would have gone much longer if noticing me at all.”

“Will you subtract a moment or two since I contemplated not acknowledging you?”

“Hearsay.”

“Only if you have the ability to corroborate and don’t.” You held your hand out to the side toward him, stopping in your tracks. 

Aro only looked at it from the side of his eye, not even stopping. He did grace you with a smile though. “I should like to keep my victory unnegotiated.”

Ah, yes… the cat walking next to whatever you could call it that killed it. You closed the distance with a few long strides, now playing catch up with him. “You were loud.”

“I was not aiming for stealth.” If Aro was trying to humble you, it was working.

“And what was your target then?”

Silence again. It was comfortable. In time you came upon your favorite spot in the gardens — the point at which you could overlook the better portion of the town. It was beautiful -- quiet and empty for the most part at this time of night but the evidence of mortality there, living and dying… well, you still found it charming. 

“Would now be the appropriate time to thank you?”

“For heaven's what?”

“For…” You finally looked at him beside you. He wasn’t looking at you; perhaps he was gazing beyond this little enclave in Tuscany. “For your hospitality.”

“Hospitality is for guests.”

“I was a guest for a small while.”

“You were more of a defendant.”

“Well, then, I thank you for your arbitration.”

“My ‘arbitration’?”

“Yes.”

Aro exhaled for the show of it. “Do stop your simpering and get on with what you mean.” 

You were speechless.

“I didn’t say ‘shut up,’ did I?”

You blinked at him. “I suppose… I am grateful to be somewhere nicer.”

“I can hardly be thanked for your decision to come here.” He still refused to regard you. You imagined it was a rare thing for Aro to resist such expressions of the kind. He was a proud man after all. You looked back out at Volterra.

Aro finally turned his eyes to you. It was a withering look. Now that you obliged. “I saw quite a bit in that mind of yours. It is such a shame that you were thoroughly convinced of such horrible things.”

You were confused. “The only thing that I was convinced of was inferiority.”

“Like I said,” he snipped. “Horrible things.”

“Now how is that horrible,” you inquired. Surely this did not bother him personally. Aro did not strike you as the type. “I do you no injury in my lack of pride.”

“And you think it is good for the Volturi’s reputation, for the guard’s reputation to have but one who thinks themselves lesser than even humans?” Aro seemed to shudder at the ‘h word.’

Oh. There it was. He was right. Your head lowered.

He tilted your chin up for the second time. It wasn’t as gentle. This time it was a scolding. Aro was not pleased. He released it looking back onto the town. “And you must stop that. It’s unbecoming.”

It was lost on you how to respond. “Sorry.”

“Already forgiven, my dear.”

“I guess… I just want to thank you for taking a chance.”

Aro scoffed and looked at you fully. He wasn’t a tall man; his height was hardly what made him intimidating. What made him intimidating was the stature with which he carried himself, the raw power, the hunger, the intelligence. A man like him hadn’t gotten to where he was without some impressive cunning. 

“I might find low esteem from my subordinates satisfactory on the usual occasion. I will not mince my words -- on you it is a most distasteful thing. I will forgive its ugliness for its reaffirmation but only for a time.”

If there was any functional air in your lungs, it would’ve been snatched from you. His words were not harshly spoken nor were they loudly boomed at you. Instead they broke skin like something sharp to vulnerable flesh. Aro took an imposing step forward. You took one back but it wasn’t enough. Your neck was craned up at him despite every inner instinct to shrink away; you wouldn’t dare disobey him again. You weren’t sure he would be as kind.

“There is nothing so abhorrent as one of our kind — our superior, beautiful kind — acting in the embarrassing way you continue to. If I was capable of emptying my stomach at the thought, I would.” Aro plucked something minute off your shoulder before rolling it between his long fingers and discarding it to the wind. “And as far as taking a chance is concerned, I- The Volturi- do not ‘take chances.’ Make no mistake, there is no calculated risk with you being here.”

“I-”

“If that is an apology or another meaningless expression of gratitude poised on your tongue, I would advise that you hold it there.”

You could only gape up at him. He was leaning over you still, very close.

“You will show the full extent of your gifts tomorrow. I want you officially in the guard as soon as possible.” And with that, Aro was gone, stalking away into the gardens.

With about 12 hours to ruminate on Aro’s words to you, you had decided that he had a flair for melodrama. You also decided definitively that you would never let him know such a thing unless he pried the information from you, which he was indeed capable of. This… what you were being made to do before the Volturi… You would not define it with such levity. When Aro had said that you were to display the full extent of your gifts, he had meant it. 

It wasn’t certain whether it was you or the man writhing on the ground that was the subject of the gripping fear that your nightmares brought, what with your upper body being curled in on itself the way it was. Your fingers were curled at the ends of your locked arms with effort. The unfortunate human’s whimpers rattled along the domed ceiling, merely an accessory to the deep hum in your ears. 

There was an exaggerated yawn from behind you — showy for a vampire — Jane’s. And a voice cut through the whole of it, halting your powers immediately. “No, no. That won’t do at all.”

Because you had already been shrinking away at the time of the interruption you needed only to open your eyes. The body thudded to the floor. Relief. It wouldn’t last. Aro was shaking his head as he leaned against his throne.

“You, my dear-” he pushed off his spot and stopped just behind you “-are holding back.”

The man, as far as you could tell, was only deeply phobic of spiders. It was how you had done it the dozens of times you’d done it before. Except for…

Out of the corner of your eye, Caius held a finger to his temple, rolling his eyes. Asshole… Aro’s voice pulled you back. “Try again.”

You clenched your eyes shut, your chest coiling up in kind. The man began wheezing almost instantaneously, the only sound in the room.

“No.” Aro cut in once again and you dropped focus. You turned to face him, your muscles loosening in the way that only annoyance could make them. His red eyes glimmered back at you. “That is not what I meant. Again.”

You huffed. You’ve done it once before, his face seemed to say. Who were you kidding… that was exactly what his sharp features said. When you had channeled that much power, you had been in an entirely different state of mind. That had been the raw rage you had buckled behind survival. All you had done was suddenly unleash it. You weren’t certain that you still had it in you. “Aro. I can’t-”

“Ah, ah, ah.” Nonsense. His hand straightened to a point — the human, once more. 

You faced more of your body, still tense, eyes clamping shut. Your arms locked to your sides and you willed the fear forward before you tensed — thunder in your ears. Your muscles reacted in pure instinct, the man weeping in perfect time. Despite the overwhelming physical sensation of pushing the abstract forward, you could feel Aro behind you. It was stronger this time.

Oh, the man wasn’t just afraid of spiders.

Between the spiders, flickering amidst the impossible number of angular legs and blinking sets of eyes, the insects that dribbled into every corner of his vision, there was something else. A girl with one dark eye and a knife. She was young.

You jolted backward, knocking briefly against Aro. If he minded he didn’t indicate any such sentiment. Your lip curled into a sneer. The human… he was pleading with a higher power that was certainly not listening if it was there at all. Pathetic.

When your eyelids closed this time they didn’t tighten. It was a flutter. And this time when your muscles tensed, you trembled. Where there was air between the clawed fingers at your side, you imagined the man’s fleshy neck. This… this was righteous. The girl began closing in, spiders skittering out of her path.

Aro’s voice brushed your ear. “May I?” You nodded your head, although you weren’t certain as to what exactly you were agreeing to. Aro would not harm you; you were sure of it.

It felt like a baptism. In a way it was. Feather light, Aro’s fingers ghosted first at the base of your neck, gently pulling the muscles out to your shoulders. In the touch you were acutely aware that it wasn’t intimacy that Aro was after; he was honing you. Your nightmares were only encouraged.

Aro’s hands smoothed over your shoulders with a quiet mastery -- tender in the way a sculptor guided pliable clay between their fingers as it spun at their behest. The harshness was gone with but a swipe. 

The man bellowed. He sounded now more of a screeching animal than man. The girl picked up her pace, almost a jog. The knife winked at him.

It turned into a full grasp as Aro traveled down your biceps, tugging the astriction out. He chased the natural form of the muscle down your elbows into the joint of your wrist. The rigidity in your fingers released at the pressure he placed there -- conjoined in poise.

You pushed a stronger assault of terror forward to meet the man. Long gone were the spiders. There was a small part of you that recognized that he wished for the insects instead of the young girl with a bruise ready to bury the knife in his chest, his stomach, anywhere the business end would find purchase. She was standing over him.

He screamed. Yes, ‘scream’ was the right word for it…

You spectated his nightmare; the girl with the dark eye had already started plunging her blade into him. Again. Again. Again. Again.

Aro’s hands shed themselves from your arms but only for a moment. Your chin bloomed with the familiar feeling of his fingers, turning it and angling it upright. Proud as it was meant to be.

He whispered again. “Look.” It was a gruesome sight. 

The possibility that the man had begun gouging out his own eyes the moment Aro had begun amending your posture was a good one. If that was the case he had indeed made decent progress. The man was on his knees and his left eye hung from its socket like a generous helping of hot cheese, swinging. You almost wanted to applaud the man’s zeal. Only a desperate rodent would have done what he had. His grubby fingers pushed into his own skull again, getting around the other eye, bemoaning his self-inflicted plight. He seemed to be chewing the air. There was viscera on the marble -- not the first time it had been so defiled and it certainly wouldn’t be the last.

Still, you didn’t relent; you had never extended your power this far. God, why hadn’t you done it before… Sure, you- no, he had taken his eyes but somehow it wasn’t enough. The young girl brandishing the blood-soaked knife was still angry. This was justice. And he hadn’t yet paid in full.

He howled, writhing.

Marcus approached at the very edge of your vision. “Aro… is this-?” 

He was halted by an upheld hand, the other slowly falling from your chin. Aro watched you as you watched the man, watched his nightmares.

“We needn’t toy any longer.”

The thunder in your ears rumbled to silence. “This is toying? If you saw what I saw, you’d know…”

Marcus seemed taken aback. You weren’t sure if it was because of how true your words were or how right they sounded coming from your mouth.

You drifted back to the man. “He deserves it.” Your voice came out no louder than a whisper.

“It’s alright, Marcus. We asked for an assessment-” The ensuing squelch and sudden cry indicated the man had found success on his second endeavor. “-and we have indeed received one.”

You found Aro’s eyes with yours.

There was something of an assuaged smile -- his bright teeth wolfish. The feeling of your cheeks pulled up was the only sign to yourself that you had been smiling. You took the moment to look about the room. Caius was staring at the man on the floor, mouth slightly ajar.

“Well?”

He turned his head first then his eyes. A grin.

You beheld the grotesque body with a sneer. He hadn’t even had the decency to look artful as he went -- his body held upright by the leverage of his spine against his heels. Pathetic. The way he dug at his own face like that… like you were some tumor, something he could just rip out of himself if he tried hard enough and be done with. He died as stupid as he looked. Your chest flared at the offense.

Aro was still standing near you. “Par excellence.”

You digested his words. You understood now. This was what he had known you were capable of. In just moments, Aro had cured you of your affliction, the debilitation of timidity. You matched his smile.

“Would now be the appropriate time to thank you?”

It was met with a giddy laugh. Aro clapped his hands together, utterly delighted at your words, your smile. He gulped it down and stepped backward offering you an expressive bow complete with arms outstretched. “No ‘thanks’ necessary. You… you are a credit to our kind.”

You bobbed your head in courteous reply to his own bow, unable to hide your giggle.

“You were never anything but.”

#yeah uh this one's intense #i apologize in advance #twilight #twilight fanfic #the volturi #aro volturi #aro volturi fanfic #aro volturi fanfiction #gore #fem reader #aro volturi x fem!reader #aro volturi x f!reader #twilight fanfiction #unreliable narrator #aro volturi x you #aro x you #aro x vampire!reader #aro volturi x vampire!reader #aro x f!reader #volturi kings #volturi fanfiction #volturi fanfic #aro volturi x reader #aro x reader

[xerith-42]

That AU where Aphmau blows up (PT2)

Me with my rewrite: I want all of these characters to talk about the things they feel and be allowed to feel happy for once!! They've earned it!!

[immediately turns around and writes even more heart wrenching angst]

Fair warning, this post is loooooong and kinda jumps between scenes. I had. A bit more to say.

Content Warning for suicide mention

Unlike everyone else, Aaron had actually slept through the night on the island. Aph had made him promise to get some extra sleep when she saw how tired he had become recently, usually due to overworking himself to keep the island alive and growing. He wasn't posted on any kind of watch shift, he didn't feel anything suddenly when she died, but there was a feeling when he woke up.

A sort of familiar dread. The feeling of birds taking off before a disaster, but he didn't know what disaster they could be flying from. Or if he should follow their lead. Just that when he finally stood up, he just had this feeling. He couldn't place why. At least not at first.

It was when he stepped into Aph's house that he could tell something was… wrong. Both Aph and Lilith were missing. Panic started to fill him instantly, and Aaron desperately fought off memories of his previous family as he raced through the alliance island. He hoped that he was just over reacting, that Aph had taken Lilith to Phoenix Drop or at least somewhere that people knew where they were. He was probably just being paranoid.

Doubt was almost instantly replaced with dread. When Aaron got to Phoenix Drop proper he knew that he was right. He wasn't just being paranoid. He could see Zoey walking towards the tree house with Lilith swaddled in her arms. Aaron could only feel a tinge of relief that she was at least okay. He could tell just from the look in Dante's eyes that Aph was dead. That kind of mourning was far too familiar.

"What happened?" He asked carefully, his body tensing to try and fight the oncoming wave of emotions.

"There was an explosion in the forest, shortly before sunrise," Dante began, taking a deep breath to keep his voice even. He had already done enough crying when he got home, he had to keep himself together in front of others. "Garroth was there, but Zane and Aph… weren't."

"D-Did she leave anything behind?"

"Her diary, which Garroth has. And--" Dante reached into his armor and handed Aaron a folded page. He unfurled it and could once again feel his heart sink as he read over her words. She knew. And he should have known she would do it. It's in a lords nature to sacrifice themselves no matter how foolish it is to do so. "I'm sorry--"

"Don't." Aaron took a steady breath, read the letter over again, and then handed it back to Dante. "I'll go make sure I can move in with Lilith and look after her."

"Right. Let me know if you need any help with that." Aaron just nodded, moving past Dante and pulling the bandana out of the pocket of his cloak. He wasn't sure how much longer he'd be able to hide. Given the pitying look Dante gave him, he wasn't doing a very good job in the first place.

Though Dante's concern was nothing compared to the look of complete despair in Zoey's eyes. They were blood shot, and she had clearly been crying, but even when she wasn't she looked completely miserable. A weary smile spread across her face, but it was quickly replaced with the morose look she wore before.

"I-I'm sorry for taking Lilith without saying anything," She began with a teary voice. "It was just the first thing I thought of when I heard the--"

"It's okay," Aaron answered simply. "Thank you for looking after her." He grabbed a guitar from the weapon stand. Most weapon stands had them now, and it was a top priority to have musical instruments at the ready. Aaron was one of the people who pushed it most. "The little one will be cared for."

Lilith let out a small giggle, reaching for the end of Aaron's bandana as he leaned over her and pressed a kiss to her forehead. He settled back, sitting next to Zoey as he tuned the well loved instrument. [Insert Flowers on the Battlefield here]

The moment Zoey heard the familiar notes she couldn't stop her tears. She tried in vain to wipe them, to hide them from Lilith, but there wasn't much she could do. Aaron himself was only able to hide behind his bandana, but it didn't do a lot. The melody just reminded them of good times, and the crushing defeat of those times being taken away so suddenly.

Nobody knew where Garroth was at first. Travis assumed he'd be at Aph's house, but the place was hauntingly empty. It was from the top of the hill that he could not only hear Aaron's guitar, but he could see Garroth down at the docks, trying in vain to tear out old planks of wood. It was the first time Travis had really gotten a look at Garroth, especially without the armor. He looked… So sad.

He at least wanted Lilith to hear the song one more time. To remember the sound that could so perfectly encapsulate her mother and her impact on those around her. Even if she would never get to properly meet her.

Garroth's head jerked the minute Travis was close enough to notice. Travis nervously held his hands up as a sign of peace, which Garroth just turned away from.

"Hey," Travis said awkwardly. "I'm Travis."

"I guess you already know my name," Garroth replied, refusing to look at him.

"Look I--" Travis held back the urge to put a hand on Garroth's shoulder. "I'm not great at emotional stuff. And I know we really don't know each other, but I-I knew Aph, and I knew Laurance, and they both told me a lot about you. I thought I'd… I don't know." Travis took a shaky breath. "Sorry…"

"Aph was always better at the emotional talks, wasn't she?"

"I wanted to see if I could do anything for you." Travis stepped so he was standing next to the man. "Could at least get that splinter out."

"Yeah." Garroth let out a sigh, tearing another board out and groaning as a splinter slipped into his finger.

"Is there something you wanted?"

"It's not worth worrying about." Travis let out a small sound, almost a laugh, which made Garroth finally look up to meet him eye to eye. Some part of his heart ached at the sight of Travis' bright green eyes. They were almost the same color as Laurance's when Garroth met him. "What's so funny?"

"Aph once said that was one of the phrases she hated the most. That she was tired of her friends and guards saying that to her, because she wanted nothing more than to look after everyone, ensure we were all doing okay at the very least." Travis took a deep breath, hoping that this would be the right move. "She said it was one of the last things you had said to her before running away."

"I was a fool to let Zane get the better of me."

"From what I heard, sounds like you didn't have a choice." Garroth raised his eyebrow. "That companion of his, with the mask? She knew mind control, you really didn't have full control over yourself once she got into your head."

"H-How do you know?"

"I knew the minute Aph described the mask to me. It's something my mother warned me about." Garroth let out a small chuckle, followed by nearly full blown laughter as a tear forced its way down his face. "D-Did I--"

"No, you didn't do anything wrong." Garroth let another tear slip out. "I just, I never knew for sure. I couldn't quite tell what my own thoughts were and what she or Zane wanted me to think. I was worried it was my own foolishness entirely that doomed my friends."

"Well, that's a bit dramatic." Garroth laughed again, almost incredulously.

"I beg your pardon?"

"Sure, you messed up pretty badly, but it wasn't entirely your fault. And even if it was, it hasn't all been bad." Travis gestured to the Phoenix Settlement. "That village is making a real comeback, and it's only getting better every day. And if it weren't for those 15 years, I might not have met everyone." Garroth glanced over at the elder tree that stretched out across the skyline. His arms ached at the memory of her weight in them. He wanted nothing more than to hold her close again.

"B-But she…" Travis awkwardly held a hand out to Garroth, who just stared at it. Travis simply placed his hand in Garroth's and took a deep breath.

"Look, I didn't know Aph half as well as you did, but I do know that she wouldn't want you to blame yourself for this." Garroth turned away, swallowing down further tears. Travis squeezed his hand, before pulling away. "I'll give you some time to yourself. Let me know if you ever need anything." Travis turned, and it was only when he was a few steps away that Garroth finally spoke.

"Thank you," He whispered. Garroth knew he was alone after that, letting him take a step back, and then sit on the part of the docks that wasn't falling apart. His eyes drifted to the diary tucked into his bag. Was there… A page looked out of place. Garroth reached forward and pulled on it, pulling out a fairly worn piece of paper, one that he could tell just from a glance was stained with tears.

Garroth and Laurance,

Oh no.

I know what I'm doing is especially unfair to you two. We all fell in love together, and I wish we could grow old together. There's a chance we still could. But there won't be a chance if Garroth can't be there with us. So I have to bring him back.

Laurance, I can't even imagine how you'll feel. I really wish there was another way, but I can't have anyone else, especially you, sacrificing themselves for something I want. If I could make you do one thing, I'd make you promise not to run away. Please, don't leave him. Please.

Garroth, I'm so sorry. I truly wish there was more I could say to express how much I currently miss you, and how much I'm going to. But you deserve to have a life, to see the way the world has changed because of your bravery, and you deserve to have your chance at a redemption I don't think you need.

I love you both.

"What is wrong with you?!" Vylad roared as he grabbed Laurance and nearly threw him to the ground.

This one wasn't signed. It didn't have to be. It was stained with tears that belonged to more than its writer.

"Ow! The fuck-- Vylad?!" Laurance groaned as he threw off Vylad's grip. The two were just at the edge of the cursed forest, not too far from the borders of Meteli. "What are you doing here?"

"Telling you to go back to Phoenix Drop!"

"I-I can't! Vylad, if I go back there I don't know if I'll be able to control myself."

"You learned to control yourself around her, you can do the same for him."

"I don't know if I can! I couldn't live with myself if I killed him!"

"If you don't go back there he might kill himself!!" Laurence froze. His breathing started to pick up.

"Wh… N-No, Garroth wouldn't. He's stronger than that--"

"He's always been at his strongest with the people he loves at his side. One of them is dead and he thinks it's his fault, and the other ran away from him before he could properly grieve. I doubt many could survive."

"Then why are you here?! He's your brother!"

"Because I don't know my brother. It's been almost 20 years since the last time I saw him face to face, I-I don't know nearly as much about him as you do."

"And what if I lose control? His blood would be on your hands."

"If I don't get you back to him now then it definitely will be." Laurance backed away, his head starting to ache as voices clashed within. The calling was jumping at the idea of going back to him, and Laurance hated that he was going to agree to it. But he had to. If Garroth died without him, because he left… He couldn't even entertain the thought.

"How are you holding up?" Katelyn glanced up at Lucinda, who had just placed a cup of tea on her bedside table.

Laurance took off, shortly followed by Vylad.

"How do you think?" Katelyn bit back. She instantly regretted it when she saw the hurt look in Lucinda's bloodshot eyes. "S-Sorry. That came out… Harsher than I intended."

"It's alright. I'm unfortunately familiar with some of the feelings around this."

"So am I." Lucinda sighed, leaning back and taking a sip of her own tea. "Is that how you're handling it so well?"

"Handling it well? Katelyn, if I didn't have a silencing glyph on my room you would have heard every miserable tear I shed last night." Katelyn frowned at the almost calm look on Lucinda's face.

"Why are you trying to hide it then?"

"Everyone's grieving right now. No need to saddle anyone else with my baggage."

"Like I said, I've got some myself. Why not let me lighten the load?"

"Are you sure?" Katelyn sat up a little more, leaning against the headboard of Lucinda's guest bed.

"I may not know you that well yet, but I know you cared about Aph. I think we all have that in common. Might as well care about her and mourn her together, right? It's what she would've wanted."

"She did always like bringing unlikely people together." Lucinda let out a sad sigh, setting her teacup aside. "During those fifteen years you were all gone, I lost my dad. I-I wasn't sure if everyone was dead or not when you all disappeared, but I saw my dad in his final moments. I held his hand as he passed… I suppose I'm not even sure Aph is dead until I see it."

"You still think she's alive?"

"There's a nonzero chance. Though it could just be a desperate ploy to deny the truth."

"That's what it sounds like to me, sorry."

"No need to apologize. You're probably right. Suppose her dying without assurance has made me think she could do it again."

"She always did have a new trick up her sleeve. I wouldn't put it past her." Katelyn let out a shaky sigh. "Just wish she hadn't done this in the first place."

"You and me both."

"I used to feel the same way about Jeffory."

"Jeffory?"

"An old friend of mine. He and I were in the Jury of Nine together, and he was the only person I could trust for a long time. But then he risked his own life to save Aph, and when he died, I had to know why. I had to understand why he decided this woman was worth risking everything we had built for." Katelyn's hands clenched into fists as she fought tears. "I understand why he did what he did now more than ever."

"Levin!" Malachi called out as he entered their home. "Where are you?" His response was a sniffle from upstairs. Malachi groaned. In spite of his body being younger, he still felt 900 years old, and sometimes just climbing the stairs was exhausting. He found his brother curled up in the window of his room, his music box coming to it's end as Malachi across from him in the windowsill.

Lucinda felt the words she wanted to say getting caught in her throat. She understood exactly what Katelyn was saying, but she had no idea how to respond to it. So she thought about what Aph would do. She reached her hand out to Katelyn, and interlocked their fingers. Katelyn glanced down at their hands, back at Lucinda, and then she smiled. Both of them were clearly on the verge of tears, a hair trigger away from another grief induced meltdown, but for that moment they smiled.

"How are you so okay with this?" Levin asked, his voice laced with an unusual amount of bitterness.

"What in the name of Irene makes you think I'm okay with this?" Malachi replied with an almost too soft tone.

"I-I've barely seen you cry. When Dante told us, all you thought about was making sure everyone was okay, making sure we could repair the damages. Don't you care about her?"

"Of course I do. I know you were young, but I saw mom when she was a lord. She always acted in the interest of everyone else, ensuring everyone's safety before her own. I knew that's what she would have wanted. I thought you would understand that better than anyone."

"It's what we lords do..." Levin sniffled again, a tear pushing down his face again. "Why didn't she say anything to us?"

"What?"

"She left a note with final wishes for everyone, but she didn't even mention us. L-Like she wasn't even thinking about how we'd feel about our own mother throwing her life away!"

"She probably thought we'd be able to handle it. After all, we thought she was dead for all those years before--"

"But this isn't the same! We know she's dead!"

"We don't know for sure--"

"I'm not going to live in denial again!" Tears continued to stream down Levin's face as he looked out over his village. His home. Malachi put a gentle hand on his shoulder.

"Look at all you were able to do without her. She knew we'd be fine without her." Levin sobbed, burying his head into his brother's shoulder as Malachi held him close. "I-I'm going to miss her, but we know how to do this, don't we?"

"I-I don't want to."

"I know. So let's grieve now. We might not get the chance to later with the lives we lead." Levin nodded in acknowledgement, though Malachi could feel his shoulder starting to become wet from his brothers tears.

"Where is he?!" Laurance was almost in a blind panic, his heart racing and his breathing unsteady as he stumbled into the Phoenix Settlement. He felt almost alive. "Where's Garroth?!"

"Thank you." That's all it took for Malachi to join him.

"He was at the docks last time I saw him," Travis answered. "Where have--" Laurance was already gone. He wasn't thinking straight, only worrying about one thing. Just as Laurance reached the top of the hill and saw Garroth standing there, his left leg went limp. Laurance wasn't able to catch it happening before he took a step forward, resulting in him taking a very noisy and not exactly pleasant tumble down the path to the docks.

"Laurance?" Garroth questioned as he stood up and ran over to his lover. Laurance managed to push himself up from the ground and get a good look at Garroth's face. Tear stained. He was alive. He was breathing.

"Thank Irene you're alive," Laurance muttered.

"What?"

"N-Nothing." Laurance managed to get himself to sitting, but there was no hope for his leg coming back anytime soon. Garroth simply sat in front of him, Aph's note still in his hand. "Look, Garroth, I can't even begin to voice my regret. I-I shouldn't have run away from you. It was wrong of me to leave you alone, even if I thought I was protecting you. You're the last person in this forsaken world I would lay down my life for, and I was a fool to think I was doing any good by running away from that." Garroth smiled, and then took Laurance's hand and pressed a kiss to it.

"I'm glad you've come to this conclusion on your own." Garroth turned his hand over and placed her note in it. "I knew you would eventually, considering she already did, but I was worried it would take longer." Laurance's hands trembled as he read over the words, and by the time he was done, Garroth was sitting next to him and wrapping an arm around him, ready for the oncoming wave of emotions that was eventually going to hit Laurance.

He folded the paper, handed it back to Garroth, and then used his still working leg to bring himself around Garroth and wrap him in a proper hug. Garroth instantly wrapped his other arm around Laurance and just breathed. He just felt Laurance's weight, felt his breathing, felt his presence. He was back. In spite of his words Garroth had worried Laurance had truly abandoned him. It was more than he could ask for to have him here like this again.

And even when Laurance began to cry into his arms, Garroth was still eternally grateful.

"I'm sorry--"

"Laurance, it's okay," Garroth assured him. "I understand why you ran."

"I-I just didn't want to hurt you."

"I understand."

"But I love you. I love you so much and I never want to spend a second away from you."

"I love you too." Garroth took a deep breath, before he broke their embrace simply so he could hold Laurance's head in his hands and stare into those beautiful blue eyes. "We're going to get through this, tgoether."

"Irene?"

"Right, together." Laurance leaned forward and placed a kiss against Garroth's lips. It was easily the most alive he had felt since he had undergone his transformation. Even if he was still in an unimaginable amount of pain, even if he might tear his own life apart, even if everything could somehow get worse tomorrow, he was alive enough to kiss the man he loved. That's all he could ask for.

┈┈┈┈┈❀┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈❀┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈❀┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈❀┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈❀┈┈┈┈┈

What...?

"Wake up, Irene. It's not your time to die just yet."

#btw aph did leave a note to her kids #sort of #teehee #n e ways #minecraft diaries #aphverse #aphblr #laurance zvahl #aphmau minecraft diaries #aphmau mcd #mcd #mcd laurance #mcd travis #mcd dante #travis valkrum #katelyn the firefist #mcd katelyn #mcd lucinda #mcd levin #mcd zoey #mcd aaron #aaron lycan #mcd garroth #garroth ro'meave #vylad ro'meave #mcd vylad #angst with comfort #alternate universe #garrancemau #gay block men

[wildissylupus]

hi idk how much you analyze on hanzo but something thats been on my mind is the progression of his character through non-canonical events/interactions. I am aware there isn’t a lot of canon Hanzo content so take this thought with a grain of salt.

In Overwatch 1 hanzo’s personality was more stand-offish and maybe even rude. Now in Overwatch 2 he’s more approachable in a weird way? He’s still the same brooding guy but it’s almost like we see this “healed” version of his in overwatch 2. Not just from interactions but also from his character design aka the underbags being less prominent, him looking physically more healthy, the lack of bottle that has his sake (ofc this could just be them upgrading his look in the game).

While this is amazing and something I have always hoped to see from hanzo, part of me hopes that the developers/writers still remember hanzo from Overwatch 1. There hasn’t been a lot happening canonically with hanzo since the confrontation with Genji and if they were to skip from the last we saw of hanzo to the hanzo in overwatch 2 it feels like a lack of potential and even story telling?

Don’t get me wrong I love that hanzo is being given more personality and depth. It’s so refreshing that he gets to be something other than the ex-yakuza that murdered his brother lmao.

I guess I’m afraid that his development will feel rushed or like there’s gaps in it. I want to be able to see the rugged, tired bitter hanzo turn into the hanzo that literally contemplates the idea of settling down and adopting a dog, you know what I mean? I don’t just want it to be a thing that is skimmed over. I hope Overwatch touches on the more difficult situations in regards to mental health. And this isn’t just for hanzo, it’s for the whole roster.

I hope that each characters gets to grow and learn even if it’s unpleasant and “ugly” and that we actually get to SEE it in progression. Not just time skips and flashbacks or whatever.

Maybe it’s too early in canon mission events content to judge but it is something that has been in the back of my mind. I may be proven wrong later or be completely off but thoughts???

I do agree with this, though I don't think he should still be standoffish when he joins Overwatch, I do want there to be this awkward period where everyone adjusts to having him around. I also think that the reason for his character progression is going to be explored in his short story with Kiriko. It seems from the description that he's going to be getting some closure with his father, which would explain his change from OW1 to OW2.

However I think there is a different thing that could explain his change. Kiriko. I've explained this in passing but I think that both Genji and Hanzo are going to be given a second chance to be siblings, not to each other, but the people they have found on their own respective journeys.

Genji has stated that he sees Cassidy as a brother, which is interesting considering so far, other then Angela, since even OW1, he's shown the most concern about Cassidy's well being. Specifically his mental state. Unlike with Hanzo where is has been shown that Genji wasn't really knowledgeable of what Hanzo was going through with being the eldest son. Genji shows a lot more observation with Cassidy.

(Honestly I could write a whole essay about those two and how Genji is given a second chance to be there for who he views as an older brother BUT THIS POST AIN'T ABOUT HIM!)

I believe this is going to be the same with Kiriko and Hanzo but in reverse, while Genji gets the opportunity to look out for his older sibling, Hanzo actually gets to be an older sibling. He finally gets to relax and joke around, contemplate something other than Genji's death and how he can atone for that.

It would also be a nice parallel to Genji with instead of staying hang up on a previous relationship, he ends up creating a new one that is overall better for him.

It's also the matter of Kiriko and Hanzo's relationship is a lot more salvageable then Hanzo and Genji's. Listen, as much as I love those two, there is no way in hell they're going to get the normal sibling bond the fandom likes to give them. Even if that is the end goal for the writers, they would need to write a whole other novel for that kind of relationship between the two to not feel rushed.

Now I do want to point something out about his OW2 redesign because there's more then just the lack of Sake. It that fact that he's now covering his chest. This might not seem like a lot but in his first design he isn't protecting any part or any organ that is slightly to the right, in the middle, or the the left of his chest, meaning his left lung is exposed, his heart is exposed, his spine is exposed, basically a lot of stuff you would want shot at is exposed.

Combing this with and interaction with Genji from OW1, that is alluding to the fact that Hanzo "finds living challenging", then Hanzo covering his chest is a big step.

Anyway the fact that Hanzo is now on his way to being added to the list of characters who are practicing selfcare is so funny, cause out of all the characters to end up on that very short list at the beginning of Story Mode, I did not expect it to be Hanzo.

#overwatch #overwatch 2 #overwatch lore #overwatch headcanons #analysis #ow hanzo #hanzo #hanzo shimada

[middleearthpixie]

Brilliant Disguise ~ Chapter Two

Summary: Speech therapist Josephine Asharm has been brought into Erebor to work with Bifur, but trying to find her place among people who eye her suspiciously would be difficult enough under normal circumstances, but when Sophie finds herself caught between the king, his most trusted lieutenant, and the dwarf she’s there to help? She’s certain no good can come of it. Being of Man, not only does she stand out in the dwarf kingdom, she’s not entirely certain she’s actually welcome there at all. 

Thorin only agreed to allow Sophie to live amongst them out of a sense of duty to Bifur, who is recovering from an odd head injury (is there any other way to describe having an axe blade lodged in one’s head, only to have it later dislodged during the Battle of the Five Armies?) Before the battle, he spoke only khuzdul. But since it? He’s regained the ability to speak Westron—if only he could but remember any of it. As for Thorin? He’s trying his damndest to ignore the speech therapist, not to mention his own growing feelings for her, even as he is also recovering from his near fatal wounding in the same battle. 

Both Sophie and Thorin are haunted by their pasts and are uncertain of their futures, but sometimes, chances must be taken…  

A/N: This is loosely tied into my Christmas fic, Yule. Post-BOTFA Where Everybody Lives

Summary: Sophie has her first session with Bifur, Heather settles in, determined to win that slice of cake…

Pairings: Thorin Oakenshield x OFC Josephine (Sophie) Asharm 

Characters:Thorin Oakenshield, Sophie, Balin, Dwalin, Narnerra, Heather, Gimli, Bifur

Warnings: None

Rating: T

Word Count: 3,732

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Previous chapters can be found here.

“So, I understand you made a new friend yesterday?”

Thorin grinned at his sister as Dís sank into a chair alongside him. “Ah, you mean Miss Heather?”

“I do. The ladies who saw you with her are still buzzing about how adorable you are holding a child. And I’m fairly certain maternal urges have been ignited.”

He fought the urge to roll his eyes. “They may buzz as much as they wish, I have no desire to hold one of my own just yet.”

Dís sighed softly, shaking her head. “You have to settle down sooner rather than later, you know.”

“And I also need no nagging from my baby sister on the matter.” He glanced down at the bread still on his plate. “I’m not going to finish this, would you like it?”

“Your leftovers? Thank you, but no, and don’t try to change the subject.”

“I’m not. But at the same time, you are Fíli and Kíli’s mother, not mine.” He wiped his mouth with his linen napkin and folded it to set across his plate. “I need no nagging, nor do I need prompting or reminding. I have my heir, thanks to the magic of elves and Narnerra’s gifts, and there will be no queen of Erebor any time soon. As for the hopefuls, they are wasting their time. I have far too much to do now before I will even consider marrying.”

“Thorin,” Dís began softly, “may I be honest with you?”

“As opposed to lying to me?” 

“Thorin?”

He sighed, bracing himself for what he was sure would be a laundry list of reasons as to why he should just suck it up and choose his bride and get on siring an heir who wasn’t one of her sons. It was one of her favorite topics since Narnerra deemed him well enough to leave her infirmary, and one he’d long since grown tired of. 

Still, he knew she wouldn’t be dissuaded and so nodded, “Go on.”

“I rather thought that what happened,” a shadow fell over her Durin blue eyes, “that what you’d gone through, would have made you more open to the notion of taking a wife and starting a family of your own. And I don’t mean to nag you, as you so succinctly phrase it, but I hate the thought of you being alone. You’ve been alone since Smaug—”

“I know how long it’s been,” he told her, rising from his chair and gathered up his dishes, “and to be honest with you, Dís, it really is none of your concern. Now, if you will excuse me, I have to go find Balin, as we have an appointment with Bard in Dale and I just wish to get it over with and come back.”

“Thorin—”

“Enough.” He couldn’t keep the irritation from his voice as he shook his head. “My love life, or lack thereof, is none of your concern and I’ll kindly ask you to mind your own matters and leave me to mine.”

He didn't wait for her response, nor did he feel the least bit guilty about the look of hurt that crept across her face. She meant well, but she overstepped on a regular basis and while most times he didn't mind, this was one subject he most definitely minded discussing. 

Yes, he knew many of the dwarrowdams of Erebor harbored hopes of becoming queen, but he had no desire to make those hopes come to fruition. Not now, anyway. Erebor had come a long way since he’d first set foot in it not quite a year earlier, but there was still a long way to go and a lot of work that needed to be done. 

He found Balin down in the gems room, where he was weighing out a pile of sparkling clear blue stones. “Are you just about ready to go?”

“A good morning to you as well, Thorin,” Balin replied without looking up. “What happened, that you are in such a hurry to head out to Dale?”

“I need to put distance between myself and marriage-minded hopefuls.”

Balin chuckled. “They all know about you and Miss Asharm. And now visions of weddings and babies are filling heads throughout Erebor. Many of them would give their eyeteeth to give you bairns. But, that isn’t exactly a terrible thing now, is it?”

“Oh, not you, too.” Thorin sighed softly as he leaned against a wooden worktable along the wall. “Dís thinks I should simply choose one and get started on those babies.”

Balin looked up and whisked his jeweler’s loupe from his head. “And you don’t want this?”

“I’ve yet to meet one I wish to take as mine.”

“You seemed quite taken with Mrs. Asharm.”

Thorin smiled. “Ah, but she is married and even if she wasn’t, I was not taken with her. She’s…  interesting, is all.”

“You spoke with her for about five minutes, Thorin,” Balin replied slowly, setting the loupe on the table alongside his scale. “And you know only that she has a daughter and she will hopefully be able to restore Bifur’s fluency in Westron. The smattering of it he has now is only enough to frustrate anyone who doesn’t speak khuzdul.”

“Perhaps we should all go back to speaking only that.”

“Ah, but then how do we trade with Man, and with the Elves? Man only knows Westron and the Elves speak Sindarin and Westron.”

“So, we keep him from interacting with anyone else.”

“Thorin.”

He sighed and nodded toward the scale. “What are you doing?”

“This?” Balin dumped the small stones into an equally small, black bag. “They are to be made into a necklace. For Vandimora. Our anniversary is coming up fast.”

Thorin smiled. “You should have mentioned this last eve. I’d have asked one of the others to accompany me.”

“Ah, but they do not know or understand contract law.” Balin tucked the little pouch inside his tunic and eased down from his stool. He only came up to Thorin’s shoulder, even when his puffy white hair was at its fullest. He was also one of Thorin’s most trusted lieutenants, along with Balin’s brother, Dwalin. “So, Vandi’s necklace will wait a bit longer. I have time, just not much.”

“Well, I appreciate it just the same. Hopefully this will not take all day, and it will still be light by the time we return.”

The infirmary was one floor above the Sophie’s apartments, just beyond the Great Hall and it’s proximity to the surface, instead of being buried deep within the mountain, offered up a warmth that was a welcome respite from the dank chill Sophie still hadn’t acclimated herself to just yet. 

She pushed open the door to find Narnerra’s son, Gimli, sitting in one of the chairs normally reserved for those waiting to be seen. His feet dangled a good foot from the floor, and he swung them as if without a care in the world.

“Good morning, Mrs. Asharm,” he said, running a hand over the beginnings of what would one day be a rust-colored beard that matched the rust-colored braids that fell just below his shoulders. He was one of, if not the youngest dwarves in Erebor and as his mother explained to Sophie, he often spent his time alone, which was was a shame because he was a sweet boy. At the moment, his blue eyes danced with hope. “Is Heather with you?”

“No, I’m sorry, love, but she is with Miss Oakmane, which, I have to admit, I thought is where you would be, too.”

He nodded. “I will be in a minute. I’m waiting for Mama to kiss me goodbye.”

With that, Narnerra came out of one of the back rooms. “I am so sorry, mesmel,” she told him, bending over to press a kiss into the top of his head. “Mr. Bifur was a bit agitated this morning. I think he’s nervous about working with you, Mrs. Asharm.”

“Please,” Sophie replied with a smile, “Sophie is fine and he’s not the only one who’s nervous, I’m afraid.”

“You’ll be fine,” Gimli piped in as he hopped down from his chair. “Mama, I’m going to find Heather. Can she sit with us at supper tonight?”

“That would be up to her mother, Gimli,” Narnerra reminded him softly. “So, perhaps you should ask Mrs. Asharm.”

Sophie turned to her smile to Gimli as he said, “Can—er—may she come and sit with us at supper tonight?”

“I don’t see why not, Master Gimli. Perhaps you might get her to eat something healthy because I certainly haven’t had much luck with it.”

“I can try.” He hurried to the door as fast as his short legs would carry him. “I’ll see you at luncheon, Mama!”

“Behave!”

“I will!”

The door closed behind him and Sophie turned to Narnerra. “He is such a sweet little boy.”

“He’s far younger than most of the other children here and they tend to push him aside. But he absolutely adores your daughter. He’s very protective of her.”

“I can see that.” Sophie nodded, then gestured to the door from which Narnerra had come. “Is Mr. Bifur in there?”

“He is.” Narnerra pressed a heavy folder into her hand. Bifur’s file, no doubt. “But, I’ll warn you, on days like today, he tends to feign not being able to speak Westron at all. Don’t let him fool you. He has a ways to go, but he understands more than he lets on.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” Sophie told her. “If you’ll excuse me then.”

“Of course.”

They parted then and Sophie took a deep breath and tugged open the door. She stepped into the small room whose window overlooked an equally small, tree-ringed courtyard. “Mr. Bifur?”

The man at the window was short and broad, with a heavy fall of thick, silver-streaked black hair, and an equally heavy beard that was more silver than black, while his mustache remained black as night. A large, jagged red scar marred the upper left portion of his forehead and she looked down at the parchment in the folder to see why. He’d apparently had an axe blade embedded in his skull until the Battle of the Five Armies, where it had finally been dislodged. 

He stared at her, his dark eyes cold and distant. She smiled and held out a hand. “I’m Sophie and I’ve been looking forward to meeting you.”

He didn't blink as he muttered something in khuzdul and turned back to the window. 

“What have you heard about me?” she asked, setting the file on the small table before moving to join him at the window. The sun splashed courtyard looked very inviting on this chilled autumn afternoon, as the infirmary was far too warm for her liking. 

He shrugged, then replied in khuzdul again. 

“Well, I’m not nearly that much of a taskmaster. There is no point. It’s not up to me to do the work, as I speak both your language and mine fluently. You, however, have to relearn Westron and I know it won’t be easy. But, I’m patient and I know you’ll get it.”

“And if I do not?”

She smiled. “You will. Would you like to go outside and have our session out there?”

“Yes.”

“Then we can do that. Come along. I find a more informal setting tends to make things easier, so if you like, we can work outside as long as the weather permits. And on days when it doesn’t, we’ll find somewhere else to work. How does that sound?”

He looked over at her, his eyes still distant, but he nodded and slowly managed to say, “I would like that.”

“So would I.”

So, she led him out into the cool breeze, which riffled through his heavy beard and sent his hair fluttering up about his head. It was a beautiful day, the breeze cool and crisp as it rustled through the trees, and they made themselves comfortable at a table in the far corner, near the low stone wall that ringed it. 

“Tell me, when did your accident happen?”

Bifur’s dark eyes met hers and clouded slightly. He opened his mouth, but then closed it just as quickly and frustration made him grimace. “Might I tell you in my language?” he asked in khuzdul.

“I’d rather you try in Westron. And it doesn’t matter if it takes you a while. Try it, and if it really is too difficult, you can revert. But, I’d like you to use Common Speech as often as you can. The more you do, the faster it will all come back to you.”

He scowled. “I think it will never come back.”

“Bifur.”

His scowl deepened. “What if… it doesn’t?”

“We will worry about that when and if it happens. But,” she smiled at him, reaching over to cover his hand with hers, “I think it will. It usually does.”

He glanced down at her hand, then back up at her. “It happened… almost six ye-years ago. A bat—battle with orcs.”

“Orcs. They are the root of all evil,” she said softly. “Did one hit you?”

He shook his head. “No. It… it was one… of the… dwarves … I—I—Iron Hill.”

“One of Dáin Ironfoot’s men?”

He nodded. “Accident. Swung at an—an orc. Missed. Got—got me instead.”

“You’re lucky he didn't kill you.”

“Not nearly… as…fie—fie—fie—” He let out a heavy sigh, pounding a fist on the table as he tried again. “As fie—fie—fierce as us.”

Her fingers tightened about his hand. “Easy, Bifur… I don’t want to see you get yourself worked into a fury. That makes both our jobs that much harder.”

He sighed softly, his shoulders slumping. “Im—impossible.”

“No. It’s not. If it was, I wouldn’t be here. But, it’s not going to be easy, either. However, I think if we work together maybe four days a week to start, you’re going to pick it all up very fast.”

That seemed to mollify him for a while and the rest of their session went fairly smoothly. When they finished, he smiled and in khuzdul said, “I appreciate what you’re doing here. I hope it isn’t much trouble.”

She shook her head. “It’s no trouble at all, really. But, it’s really up to you. If you find it’s overwhelming, we can cut back. Or we can add more if need be.”

“Mama!”

Sophie turned as Heather shot across the courtyard and flung herself at Sophie, who caught her with a slight, “Ooof!”

Bifur chuckled and waved at Heather. “Good afternoon,” he said in slow, but nearly perfect Westron.

Heather offered up a shy smile as she snuggled up against Sophie. “Good afternoon.” She pointed to her forehead. “What happened to you?”

A hint of color came to his cheeks and he leaned forward to shake his head and have his thick dark hair fall over the healing scar. “I wish not to speak of it,” he said in khuzdul.

Heather turned to her. “What did he say, Mama?”

“He has no wish to talk about it, which is fine.” She gave Heather a squeeze, adding, “And it’s none of your concern, either, love.”

Heather’s eyes were troubled. “I didn't mean to make him mad, Mama.”

Bifur shook his head and in Westron, replied, “Not mad. Tired.”

“Oh. You should take a nap. That’s what Mama makes me do when I’m tired during the day.”

Bifur offered up a smile and nodded. “Perhaps.”

As he stood and then made his way back toward the fortress, Sophie held Heather away. “Where is Gimli?”

“He had to go. Miss Narnerra was looking for him.” Heather turned to watch Bifur disappear back inside. “Was he hurt in the war, Mama?”

“No. Actually the war helped him. But again, it isn’t any of your concern. Are you hungry?”

Heather nodded. “I am, and after supper, can I go exploring with Gimli? I have to win that piece of cake from Mister Thorin.”

Sophie hesitated. Erebor was a vast underground city, and not only was it so easy to lose one’s way, the level where the forges were was so very dangerous, she didn't want Heather anywhere near there. 

Still, she didn't want to disappoint her daughter about the cake, either. “Oh, I don’t know, love. It’s so dangerous.”

“We won’t go near the forges. I promise. Please?”

“For a little while only.”

Heather brightened. “Thank you, Mama!”

Sophie sighed as she carried Heather into the Great Hall. Don’t let me regret this.

“Ah… nice to see you again, Mrs. Asharm.”

She looked up at Dwalin’s greeting and smiled. He made her a little nervous, though she tried to keep it to herself. And it wasn’t fair to judge him on his appearance, but he just looked so… fierce… and so ready for a fight that it kept her on her guard.

Heather, however, had no such reservations as she held out her arms to him. “Can I fly again?”

“Heather!”

But Dwalin chuckled and reached for her. “Of course, but only fer a moment or two. I dinna want ye getting sick.”

With that, he lifted her over his head and swooped her about the room, which caused everyone else there to stop what they were doing and watch. Judging by the looks of surprise, she had the feeling many were not used to seeing this side of the Royal Guard’s captain. 

Heather loved every moment of it, shrieking with laughter as she soared above everyone. Dwalin stood at least a head taller than everyone else in the room, so Heather must have really felt as if she flew. 

But then he brought her back, setting her on her feet at Sophie’s side. “Back safe and sound.”

“Thank you, Mister Dwalin,” Heather said, then climbed up onto the closest bench.

Sophie smiled at him. “You don’t have to do that every time she asks, you know.”

He shrugged. “I don’t mind it. I have no children of my own, and with the exception of Gimli, there are no other wee ones. If I can make her laugh for a few minutes, I don’t mind doing so.”

“Even so, don’t ever feel you cannot say no to her. In fact, you should every now and again.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.” His blue eyes softened. “Would you and the wee one like to sit with us?”

As he spoke, he gestured to a table at the back of the hall, where Lady Dís and her two sons already sat. One was blond, one was dark, and she knew their names were Fíli and Kíli, but she didn't know which son was which. A chair to Lady Dís’ left was empty, and she wondered if that was were the king would sit when he arrived.

“Thank you, but—”

“Ah, there you are.” Thorin stepped up to them. “Dwalin, if you have a minute? I need to speak with you.”

“Of course. I was just asking Mrs. Asharm if she and her daughter would like to join us, and I may be wrong, but I think she was about ta say no.”

Thorin turned to her. “If you were, I hope you’ll reconsider. I’m curious to hear how your first session with Bifur went. And,” he smiled over at Heather, “how your exploring is going?”

Heather smiled, her eyes sparkling as she said, “I will know all the places by Friday, Mister Thorin. I promise.”

“I’m sure you will.”

Sophie sighed as Heather turned to her. “Can we sit with Mister Thorin, Mama? Please?”

“I suppose it would be all right,” she said, looking back to Thorin to find him still gazing at her. He truly did have beautiful eyes—pale blue, with enviably thick black lashes around them. It was easy to see why so many of Erebor’s women giggled and gossiped over him. She’d heard three or four different woman doing so during different times of the day and all eventually turned to the same subject:

“I hear he is looking to marry soon. Now, of course, he’d never so much as look at me, but I wonder…”

It was amusing, really, to hear such blatant attempts at fishing for compliments, as the speaker was inevitable reassured that of course Thorin would look at them for they were stunning, or striking, or gorgeous or whatever adjective would make the speaker smile and play coy. And then the giggling and plotting would start up, some scenarios so outlandish, she rolled her eyes with enough force to worry they might become stuck that way.

But, truth be told, he was very handsome, with long, black, silver-streaked wavy hair and those striking blue eyes. Like almost every other dwarf, he also bore a full beard, although his was not nearly as long as any of the others. Unlike them, there were no beads or runes in his beard, it simply wasn’t long enough. But, his hair was another matter. Two narrow braids, one at each temple, hung before his ears, each had a small silver rune woven into them and a little further back, a larger silver ornament could be seen through the shifting strands. He was broad shouldered and almost as tall as his lieutenant. She also noticed the thin scar that sliced diagonally from above his right temple into where his right eyebrow began, but it hardly detracted from his brooding good looks. In fact, she’d suggest it actually added to them.

And when he smiled! Oh, she’d heard the phrase having one’s breath stolen from their lungs, but she’d never experienced it for herself until the previous night, when he’d caught Heather. Those brooding good looks became downright, dangerously handsome. 

However, he was also a king. A dwarf king. She was neither royalty of any sort, nobility of any sort, nor was she a dwarf. So, it mattered not how handsome he was or anything since she was an employee of Erebor. He would always be out of reach for her, even if she was looking.

Which she most definitely was not.

He smiled then and held out a hand to Heather, who cheerfully caught it. “If you will come with me, then. I’ll introduce you to the others.”

#The Hobbit #Thorin Oakenshield #Hobbit Fic #Hobbit Fanfic #Fan fiction #The Hobbit fan fiction #Thorin x OC #AU #Thorin Fic #Is it hot in here? #Romance #Richard Armitage

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Beautiful Anomaly (Part 4): Morpheus x FReader

(Gif by missvifdor from this post: Hi ! I am a french — Me: Morpheus I don't see why you are arguing with... (tumblr.com))

Morpheus x FemReader (present day, its a little hard to explain)

A couple of disclaimers:

1.) This is all based on the Netflix show and I have 0 background on the graphic novel it is based on (so don't expect it to be faithful);

2.) This is a fan work, the only benefit I derive from this is sharing it with the community.

And here is Part 4. Thank you to everyone who has been following this story and who has been commenting on all my posts and who has been messaging me (They really make my day). Brief announcement - Part 5 will be posted on the last week of September because a.) my midterms are going to be here soon so I need to focus on that first; and b.) My birthday is on September 30 (So I know people will definitely be awake). Again feel free to comment down below (Why do I sound like a youtuber?)

For those of you who are new. I highly recommend reading the previous parts first because I don't know if you will understand everything without first reading those.

Part 1:

Part 2:

Part 3:

I made it big so you have no choice but to notice it and I cannot be held liable for you not being warned to read those parts first.

Taglist (if you want to be a part of the taglist just comment requesting so) : @winxschester @true-queen-of-mischief @laydreams @memento-mora @daydreamin1220 @kuchokitty @fate-huntress @igotanidea @mikariell95

"How was your sleep?" You hear Morpheus ask as you take a quick glance at the time showing that it's 4:25 PM and your eyes slowly adjust to the dimly lighted room. Your vision slowly shows Morpheus standing near the doorframe of your small dorm sized bedroom.

"It was energizing. Thank you, Morpheus for that." He gives you a relaxed nod as you stretch out from your bed. You have a hunch that while you were asleep he has briefly returned to the Dreaming to perhaps settle a few things related to his duties and returned to your side the moment he sensed you were about to awaken.

"How was the Dreaming?" His brow twitching up indicated his mild surprise.

"How did you know I returned there?"

"Just a guess, I wasn't entirely sure either. Besides what matters is that you're here again."

"Well I have learned first hand what are the consequences of not listening to you. And it's a mistake that I am actively trying not to repeat." You're glad that you were washing your face right now to freshen up and that Morpheus couldn't see you blush right now. Yet you can't heart can't help but leap at the thought of maybe some hope is not unfounded.

But that was still a mere fantasy, and no matter where this leads you find yourself breathing easier that you and Morpheus were at least talking again.

"And now you will begin learning to actually live. At least in the ordinary human context." You place a thin layer of Maybelline face powder in the shade Nude to counteract the oiliness of your skin. If you weren't feeling lazy you would maybe apply some light eyeshadow to make sure none of the excess oil pouring from your forehead would bother your eyes. But you weren't feeling like it and you were bringing the powder along with the blue oil control film. Besides you weren't dressing up for anything fancy, just formally introducing your daughter to Dream of the Endless. She's already met Death enough times socially in this lifetime to start informally calling her "Aunty".

With one last tug you unbraid your black hair and let it flow out and softly comb only the areas near your scalp and leaving the newly formed curls untouched. Arranging them in a way that was reminiscent of what Yennefer of Vengerberg's hairstyle was. Since this was a casual dinner meet up, you decide to only have just a little bit of dressiness that elevated the casual attire. You come out of your bedroom dressed in dark high waisted denim jeans with a white blouse with floral embroidery.

"Ready to go?" Morpheus has an unreadable expression on his face. From what you can tell, his eyes widening a little bit must have been his surprise from you disturbing him from his own thoughts. Maybe almost like a medical defibrilator.

Just as he was about to stand, a raven arrives at the living room window sill.

That must be his new raven.

You're not sure who or what started the tradition that the Sandman always needs a raven but it seems he is keeping up with tradition.

"Your new worldly assistant?"

"Yes, allow me to introduce you."

"Oh geez boss, are you sure that's a good idea? I mean normally you want me to keep a low profile among humans." Oh so he doesn't know about you yet.

"She's no ordinary human, Matthew. She is Life personified, she lives among mortals in a cycle of life, death and rebirth."

"At least until the last human, if there is any other life that still remains then I'll be reborn as whatever organism that is until no life can exist in the world anymore." Matthew turns to face you. You didn't need to read deeply to know that he was still astonished by what he is currently learning.

"Well then, it's an honor to finally meet you madam." He was definitely very different from Jessamy from the short time you have observed him. He would rather err on the side of caution even if it was scary. But this was paired up with a stubbornness to help Morpheus.

Considering how Morpheus is probably one of the last beings to ask for help if he really didn't need it, this is refreshing. Having someone who forces him to ask for help of any kind.

"Thank you, Matthew was it?"

"Yeah"

"Is this your first time in the waking world?"

"In this part of the waking world, yes. But don't worry I'm very - and I mean very - familiar with the waking world. I used to be human, and I died in my sleep and I still don't know what Lucienne did but somehow when I woke up I'm now a raven." Oh! Well that explains his more cautious nature and a mix between fear and respect in his eyes for you.

"Hmm I see. Has Morpheus taught you how to detect my energy yet?"

"I'm still teaching him how to detect and differentiate energies." Morpheus clarified as you notice that he was standing near you.

"Look I know I'm not as good as little miss perfect Jessamy, but it's a whole new weird sensation for me." Inferiority complex. Probably because he has heard stories of Jessamy.

"Well, Matthew there's a few things that you'll need to know before we go out. The spirits and supernatural beings of this country are known to be a bit territorial when it comes to their homes here."

"And what are their homes?"

"Usually ant mounds, trees, bamboo trees, almost anything from nature. But some have adapted to man made structures."

"Oh great."

"My point is that before landing on an area, say 'Excuse me' then a short introduction to yourself and that you mean no harm. It's a bit easier to distinguish them when you can detect their energies."

"Wait, if they're territorial what do humans do?"

"The humans who can detect them would either respect their wishes or disregard them. They are aware that just like me, most humans can't really detect them and so they also tend to leave them alone for the most part. In your case however you are now in the service of one of the Endless and are considered a supernatural being so they'll be expecting you to show them courtesy."

"You can't detect them?" Morpheus asks as he allows Matthew to go on his shoulder.

"My third eye is closed in this lifetime, it's my mother and one of my best friends who has theirs open. At most I can only hear some voices of the ghosts who still dwell in certain places, but that's about it."

"And what about-"

"They have developed the ability to shapeshift into human forms and have seamlessly integrated into human society. Technically one of them already is human just given supernatural powers that seem to be nightmare fuel by just the concept alone. It would be detrimental to them if they can't be detected by humans in their human forms. The main difference with them is that I don't need to exert any third eye related senses just to talk with them."

You take a glance at your phone and see that Emira has just texted that she is on her way.

"Essentially Matthew just say 'Excuse me, I'm Matthew, the raven of Dream of the Endless, and I'm here in your territory but I mean no harm.' or something along those lines. Now let's go, my daughter is on her way." You turn to get your handbag and after making sure you had everything you need you and Morpheus with Matthew still on his shoulder left your apartment.

"Her daughter?"

"She shares a bond with all of her children. And some of those children have been reincarnated in this time." He continues explaining to Matthew how it all works, with you correcting or adding in some information as you make your way to the cafe called Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf that wasn't too far from where you've lived and just required the willingness to take a walk.

By the time you've reached the cafe doors, Matthew has flown off and it was just you and Morpheus.

For about 5 seconds.

"MOM!" You were almost tackled to the ground but you can't help but laugh as you hug her.

"Hello Emira."

"Oh mom, you have no idea what I've been through -" she begins rapidly chatting with you as you gently guide her inside the cafe with Morpheus following behind. Her concerns were mainly from someone who was new and who hasn't gotten into the course of law school life yet.

"Okay before you continue, let me quickly formally introduce someone to you. Emira, this is Morpheus, Dream of the Endless." It was only then that she took notice of his figure as he steps towards her.

"Oh you're aunty Death's younger brother." He raises an eyebrow.

"She visits you?"

"Technically she visits mom but sometimes I go to mom's apartment when I want to talk about weird life things that I could only tell her - sometimes I feel better actually talking it out loud on front of mom than just through the bond. She's one of the few people who doesn't mind me thinking the way I do - aside from mom that is." After briefly making sure to get Emira's order - Morpheus refuses to take anything and was starting to be more interested in his conversation with Emira than with any actual food or drink- you decide to leave them alone as you make your way lining up behind a few people to make your order.

So far everything was going to plan. Among all your reincarnated children, Melike, or Emira as she is called in this lifetime was not just talkative but was also engaging. Even if Morpheus decided not to talk much, she would still be able to find a way to grab his attention. He couldn't simply rely on living through interactions with you alone. You were only one perspective among many.

And he needs to learn to listen to more than just yours. You weren't always right, you had your flaws, your hypocricies that you don't want to admit to anyone else. Even if you were only a few miliseconds older than Death, you knew you were far from perfect and that there were just too many variables from just the human race alone that you cannot hope to represent them all in yourself.

And Emira is a good starting point. You may not be able to see them physically, but with what Emira is showing you through your bond, based on the non-verbal expressions on his face, Morpheus was at the very least actively listening to her.

After paying for your orders and was given a beeping token that would light up and vibrate when your order was ready, you return to them just in time to hear Morpheus reply to Emira.

"Don't be too hard on yourself, I'm sure even your mother would agree that you are still adjusting to change. You are incredibly capable."

"If it was my first lifetime maybe. But now all I feel is being capable of the artsy side of things while wanting to also go into diplomatic and foreign affairs."

"Just like your mother." His tone held a hidden tenderness that you're not sure if Emira could pick up right away since this is her first time actually talking to him.

"Yes, just like mom. In both in this lifetime and when she was my father's favorite consort. She's given me her diaries that she had kept that I may learn from her even when she had died giving birth to me. And I could still see her pursuit in that and I want to join her in the field of International Relations."

"Speaking of your mother." She turns to look at you as you take your seat in between them.

"If it makes you feel any better my experience was worse."

"How can it be worse than mine?"

"For one, I was the beadle for both my block and in all of our subjects. So imagine playing manager to all subjects while adjusting to being a law student AND learning how to balance both the needs of the professor and the wants of your classmates." Her mouth opens and let out a gasp.

"Oh and I forgot to mention - I did this in both the first and the second semester."

"WHAT?" You nod with a sympathetic smile.

"So yeah, compared to me you have it way easier."

"What she's not telling you is that she also passed all of her subjects."

"WHAT?" You give a pointed look at Morpheus who doesn't bother hiding a smirk as his eyes meet yours.

"Ignore that for now, Em, the point is that you should take your time and just keep studying and do your best. If you need a place to study you can always come to my place."

"But also remember that what seems impossible can be done with hardwork and focus."

"But how do you remember provisions? Memorization isn't my strong suit."

"Sometimes I make up little stories that makes them memorable - but that's just how my brain works okay, some people may find repetition to be more effective."

"Stories? Like cases?"

"Not always - alot of times it would come in the form of bad jokes."

"They're not that bad."

"I thought you were going to say that they weren't jokes."

"Ooh tell me one."

"Once you hear it you'll agree that it's a bad joke. Okay this one is related to Obligations and contracts - What is the legal definition of a crush?"

"What?"

"When you have a right to the fruits but not to the thing when the time of delivery arises." Emira tried holding back her laugh.

"Omg - right to the fruits but not to the thing."

"That's essentially what a crush is. You meet or see a person that you like - that's when delivery arises. But do you automatically have a right over that thing?"

"No."

"Exactly, but can you still admire that person and titilate over that person to your friends and confidants?"

"Yes."

"And that's why my daughter, its only right over the fruits."

"But mom what if it becomes a partner and not a crush anymore?"

"Then delivery has been made. The pre-existing obligation is extinguished as a new one arises."

The plan went surprisingly well. Much to your delight Morpheus wasn't completely silent and even chimed in every now and again. Even during the times he was silent he was actively listening as you and Emira would do most of the talking - perhaps a little too loudly for everyone else. It was only when Emira's biological mother in this time called that you all realized how late it was and how she needed to get home.

Looking back maybe that was when it all started. Hindsight may be 20-20 but it still didn't tell you when things began. Or maybe like many things it was a gradual progression made up of many small choices leading up to a noticeable change.

Since it wasn't always convenient for him to remain in the waking world he would sometimes meet you in your dreams when you permit him so. You'll know when he wants to talk because no matter what dream you were having you would somehow find a letter or a messenger waiting for your response. You were thankful for this since there are days when you just want to indulge in having a sweet dream and not discuss anything related to the waking world. And yet it also allowed you to know that he really was making an effort to understand the nuances and complexities of life beyond what stories could provide.

You recall bringing this up with him during one of his visits in your dreams. Only in your dreams would there exist a library that allowed you to eat and drink inside it and also have a marvelous view of a meadow and the forest that surrounds it. You were dressed in loungewear currently barefoot as you sit cross-legged on a couch that doubled as a bed by the window. Hair unfurled in curls that only came after you untangled your black hair from your fishtail braid. A round table with an ornate design was in the empty space that covered the couch's semi-circle entrance with the area closest to the window in a conventional rectangle shape so that when you don't feel like sitting, you could always lie down by the window with the round table acting as an impromptu nightstand.

Across from you on the otherside of the round table sat Morpheus with a chair pulled from one of the unused desks.

"Sometimes I feel like humans in particular are a little too addicted to stories sometimes."

"And why do you say that?"

"Morpheus, don't tell me you don't know the concept of gossip. Stories provide both pleasure and pain and is one of the ultimate ways to help a person grow or to break them down depending on what story you tell and how you tell it. It in my opinion is the thing that differentiates humans from all other species, the need and desire to know a story. Or to make one when there is no story that is satisfying enough for the individual."

"And yet you are one such individual."

"Much like many people, I can't help it. And yet you can't deny that there are things outside of a story that frequently gets over looked by those addicted to stories."

"Such as?"

"Beings simply beings. It would be more entertaining for anyone if there was a story of either great victory, great defeat, or simply a crazy unusual event rather than a mundane moment like two friends sharing a good meal or a person doing Duolingo to learn high valyrian. Sometimes they may afford a thought to the end result but not to the everyday grind and details."

"In this instance I will have to disagree with you." He becomes more relaxed in his position as you turn to look at him.

"True, there are things that an individual may simply take for a fact. But they may also be little stories themselves or may serve as part of a bigger story in their minds."

"That only proves my point of humans craving stories. Maybe it's because humans in particular have a brain that wants to see a pattern even when the facts are just mere coincidences rather than a conspiracy made by the universe."

"But don't you see that even your argument is a story in itself. You say that humans in particular neglect to see beyond the stories they tell themselves and yet the examples you've cited are all instances where small stories could be made or interpreted."

"Stories requires conflict Morpheus, and not all moments in life need to have conflict."

"True, but you also enjoy Saint oniisan a japanese movie made up of slice of life moments. And in many of those the fictionalized versions of Buddha and Jesus enjoy meals, trips, and shopping together. Like your example those are also moments from daily life. But even you cannot deny that it is a story nevertheless." Damn he got you there.

"Okay and what about my example of the daily grind of learning High Valyrian from Duolingo?"

"The story could be one of persistence and accomplishment. Appreciation for the journey as show of growth or defeat depending on the choices made." You sigh as he was able to poke holes into your arguments. He has a point but -

"Still - moments and things outside of stories still need to be appreciated more. Sometimes the stories told about ourselves or the things that we don't know are exagerrated versions of things that are nowhere near the truth. It's almost as if many individuals cannot accept that sometimes things simply are."

"I will admit you have a point. But if that were always the case then there would be no fuel for humans to take action and change the things that don't serve them."

"A neutral trait, like many things when used to the extreme it could lead to disaster." You see his expression briefly recall the time when he was captured and imprisoned by Roderick Burgess. A man who was aiming to capture Death to bring back his preferred son.

A man who cannot accept that things have changed and it showed in his response.

Maybe that was also true for Morpheus before his recent experiences according to many others who were either his creations or Calliope his former wife who was also imprisoned.

He looks into your eyes. His expression changing into something that you are not able to read, but you can feel a softness to it.

"And yet it was you taking action that things changed." He could tell you were also thinking of that time in your most recent past life.

"I've told you before that I couldn't simply leave you there."

"And yet you had the choice to do so. And out of all the beings that wouldn't have come to my aid, you were the one I couldn't entirely blame for not helping."

"Bold choice of words. I thought the first one would be either Desire or Destiny."

"Desire despises me which I blame on their ego and Destiny could have at least sent me a warning."

"You know how my sort of parent works. Destiny will probably just reason that if you were foretold then it wouldn't happen and that it needed to happen." You see some sort of a smile appear on his lips as you see him contemplate on his experiences since then.

"Perhaps. You've always told me before that the only thing constant is change."

"When you experience life and stories the way I do, it's hard to ignore change."

"Do you think I've changed since then?" You close your eyes to contemplate briefly.

"You have, even though a lot of you still remains unchanged."

"Is that so?"

"Just to be clear, sometimes things being unchanged is also good. It's not always diametrically opposed to the things that have changed. Like when the Try guys were trying on Keith's wardrobe which now have plenty of bright patterns, it turns out they miss him wearing his signature blue squares. 'The more things change the more some things remain the same' is what they said. Or something along those lines."

"And what would you say has changed and remain unchanged in me?"

"Oh we are going to be here for awhile." You change your position to straighten your back and move closer to the rounded edge of the couch to let your legs dangle over the edge.

"For the things that have remained unchanged, you still prefer brooding over your emotions - sometimes to the point where Death and I have to intervene to prevent further self-pity - you prefer to observe and watch. You are still stubborn about certain things, some of which I agree, disagree, or a mixture of the two."

"Such as now?"

"Yes. And you still have some problems simply communicating - but that is slowly changing since you are more open now than you were before and sometimes it takes time to really appreciate any improvements made."

"I'm glad to see you've noticed." You aren't sure if the tone he was using was a teasing one or if it was just simply lighter.

"But there are some things I am happy remained unchanged. You are still a wonderful creator and storyteller, which as the personification of dreams I am unsurprised by. You still do your best to do what is right and uphold your responsibilities - even though sometimes the way you go on about it may be questionable without first doing some prior research to be absolutely sure. And you still provide hope for everyone who seeks it in their dreams. As for what has changed -"

You pause as Morpheus shares the expression you have.

You were starting to wakeup.

"I guess what I'll have to say will have to wait for the next time we are both free. But I think you have some awareness of what has changed in you. What I have to say may just be redundant."

"On the contrary I enjoy hearing your perspective."

And that was the end of that conversation as you woke up and went about your day. Even then you didn't know what to make of the expressions on his face that was softer towards you or how sometimes his tone would be noticeably lighter when responding to comments.

"I wouldn't mind him as a step father." Your mind was immediately brought back to the present as you and Emira were eating a platter of fresh salmon sashimi that you ordered the night before in preparation for her visit. It was lunchtime and you two were seated across each other with your study materials pushed to one side of the large rectangular table while the side that you two occupied. She was using a fork because she's still working on mastering how to use chopsticks. On the platter you placed serving chopsticks and provided by the vendor and a serving fork on Emira's side while you ate the salmon sashimi slices with your own pair of chopsticks.

"Huh? What brought this on?"

"The way he looks at you; the way he teases and flirts with you; the way he responds to you."

"Are you sure you aren't thinking about somebody else? This doesn't sound like the Dream of the Endless that I know of."

"That's the point, maybe this is a new side that he's showing you - or showing me to maybe try and convince you." You swallow a salmon sashimi before sighing.

"It's not impossible since he's had lovers before - but I highly doubt that he's interested in me that way."

"Oh come on mom, because of you his own recent creations are better than before."

"That's because of the assignment I gave him about visiting the Waking world more frequently and to really be in the moment. But that's all based on his experience. I just gave him the prompt to do so."

"Well okay then why does he go to you specifically to talk about life?"

"I am Life. But I don't think this is an indication that he's romantically interested in me. The next best being he could consult with is either Death or Hobs."

"Okay I'll give you that, he still visits them. But has he seen Hobs fangirl over the release of SB19's new song?" You couldn't help but laugh at that. Soon after his first meeting with Emira, he has somehow made time to visit you and Emira the Friday of that week. Both you and Emira had your classes cancelled because of a thunderstorm. Emira managed to convince her parents to let her stay with you for the weekend since despite the thunderstorm you had better internet connection and your apartment was within walking distance to the law school and was more accessible. It also helped that security was tight and Emira had to register with the reception area and also had to indicate approximately how long she was going to stay. She brought everything needed to study and to prepare for class proper.

On her first day of stay as she arrived during lunch time and threw her things in the bed of one of your two guestrooms. Morpheus had materialized inside and had just finished his greetings to you when Emira rushed in holding her smartphone.

"MOM SB19 JUST PREMIERED THEIR NEW SONG WHERE YOU AT."

"WHAT?! I'm sorry Morpheus but this takes priority - Let me turn on my desktop so we have a bigger screen." You didn't wait for Morpheus to reply as you immediately rushed to what would normally be your work area, but for now it has also become your source of entertainment.

"What's SB19?" At this Emira looked at him in shock. You on the other hand, not so much.

"You're the king of dreams and YOU DON'T KNOW WHO SB19 IS?!"

"I think we should wait for a few minutes after the premiere. Just to make sure everything is in working order. Okay Morpheus, try to keep up because Em and I are very excited but I'll try to briefly explain WHO is SB19." You're still not completely sure if Morpheus was able to actually comprehend what you and Emira explained but he at least remained silent for the two of you to quickly explain that SB19 were essentially the kings of PPOP or Filipino Pop and this latest single is in celebration of their first world tour. The moment you hear the desktop spring to life you quickly go on youtube and to SB19's channel.

Looking back you're not completely sure what was going on in his head since admittedly your attention was occupied fangirling over the latest song "Where you at". It also didn't help that your bias, Ken - whose legal name is Felip Jhon Suson since he uses "Felip" for his solo songs - essentially started the song and ever since you saw him driving a car in a 50s inspired look, you basically didn't care that Morpheus was essentially seeing you as a rabid fan girl. It also didn't help that your biaswrecker Stell had very sexy dance moves while singing the first pre-chorus while acting a lot like Danny from Grease with some Elvis moves.

After essentially shrieking and screaming like the couple of fangirls the two of you are. The replay of the song was essentially you and Emira dancing along to it while Morpheus just laid back with an amused look on his face.

🎶"Let's not waste our time And try to reconnect the lines, oh yeah I miss getting electrified When I look in your eyes, oh baby!"🎶

🎶"Where you at? There's no groove within this music No sign of your heartbeat in it, I'm alone, yeah So sad, will I ever get connected? 'Cause you're already embedded In my heart and soul, yeah"🎶

"I LOVE YOU PABLO!" You hear Emira scream the next time the leader and writer of the song, Pablo - legal name: John Paulo Nase and who initially debuted as Sejun before changing it to Pablo during the Pagsibol era of SB19 and before the release of their song "What?" - appeared on screen. This time it was black and white as he was singing the second pre-chorus.

🎶"Let's not waste our time And try to reconnect the lines, oh yeah I miss getting electrified When I see all your smiles, oh baby!"🎶

🎶"Where you at? There's no groove within this music No sign of your heartbeat in it, I'm alone, yeah So sad, will I ever get connected? 'Cause you're already embedded In my heart and soul, yeah"🎶

"Oh your bias wrecker is up next Em."

"I don't know the rap yet so I'm just going to dance." While you let her dance on front of the screen you take a quick break from your mini SB19 dance party to sip some water and to check in on Morpheus.

"I'm sorry Morpheus for interrupting our conversation. I promise we'll continue after this."

"No need to worry. I'm quite entertained as to how the two of you are enjoying yourselves."

"Are you sure you don't mind?" He gives you an amused grin.

"I'm sure - and you better hurry back. The last chorus is about to begin." And before you know it, Emira was dragging you back on front of the screen for the final part of the song.

🎶"Where you at? Let's go groove into this music Oh, I can feel all your heartbeats' in the zone, yeah Go mad, now that we got reconnected We'll forever be embedded In our hearts and souls, yeah"🎶

🎶"Where you at? Let's go groove into this music Oh, I can feel all your heartbeats' in the zone, yeah Go mad, now that we got reconnected We'll forever be embedded In our hearts and souls, yeah"🎶

After two more rounds of dancing, and finally you and Emira were exhausted enough to settle down and discuss some parts of the song with Morpheus. Salient points being that Pablo wrote the song while missing his co-members because they were all forced apart to quarantine for a deadly disease. The song was produced by Pablo and his brother Joshua, choreographed by Stell, and the creative director for the music video is Justin, the youngest member of the group.

"I didn't catch this the first time but I just realized that after the bridge the lyrics in the chorus changed."

"You mean 'Oh, I can feel all your heartbeats' in the zone, yeah Go mad, now that we got reconnected' that part?"

"Oh yes! Because they're together again and they'll be going on tour and meet the A'tin again - A'tin is the official fandom name of SB19 Lord Morpheus. And don't judge me, I know mom picked up the meaning in the lyrics before I did."

"I wasn't saying anything."

"Your smirk is."

"I'm just amused. This is my first time watching anything like this up close."

"In the Waking world at least. And you must be more than familiar with similar behavior in people's dreams."

"True, but thanks to the two of you I'm actually enlightened as to why."

"Oh?" You say in a lighthearted tone. "And what insight have Emira and I provided you?"

"Celebration, appreciation, energizing movement, and heartfelt joy. I may be a stranger to your source of joy, but I still find myself thoroughly enjoying the way you two are touched by their music and the way you celebrate and appreciate them. And because of that you are energized by the song they have given you and it almost compels you to move. Towards what and how is up to you." You find yourself smiling and titilated by this. More than you would like to admit. A part of you says that you can still blame it on the high you got from singing and dancing hard to the latest song that quickly became one of your favorites when you just need to feel good. It didn't help that you know Morpheus was being genuine and it was confirmed by the non-verbal expressions on his face as his lips give a smile instead of a smirk.

Shortly after that, Emira goes off to her room to study for her subjects while you and Morpheus stayed to talk about his most recent experience in the waking world.

"I'm not sure if you've noticed mom, but he was definitely looking at you in an affectionate way. I can tell I've had boyfriends in this lifetime."

"He was just sharing his observations in the Waking world. It's basically just a student reporting to his teacher."

"Mom, little by little he was moving towards you as you got more engaged by his story about an old man who refuses to completely retire and who in his spare time still likes to drive around in a Cadillac car. The only reason he didn't hold your hand was because he respected your boundaries and because neither of you has made a move yet. But trust me, he's interested and I'm simply just telling you that I wouldn't mind it if he became my step-father that's all."

"Emira he's a good storyteller when he chooses to be. Of course I'm going to be engaged when he's actually entertaining me. Also you forget that despite his appearance he isn't human. He has no idea what personal space is or how by going into someone's personal space it may imply something more. Let's not jump into conclusions for now okay?"

"...Fine" She pouts as she picks up a salmon sashimi with her fork.

"Besides I'm not the only human he has been visiting."

"But does he appear beside Hobs when it's time to sleep and through his voice lulls him to sleep?"

"Not that I know of."

"Exactly, there's no evidence for it. And until there is, it should at most be treated as a theory."

"Look, I appreciate that I have your blessing if in case...it goes there. But right now it's premature and might simply be moot and academic. As long as there is no cause of action then there is nothing to act upon or respond to."

Emira wanted to argue back but she also couldn't deny that you had a point. Morpheus was and Endless and he didn't always understand humanity. There would be a cognitive dissonance between him, an Endless and the standards that humans are judged by. By what you can recall of his romantic history, if he wanted to pursuit someone he would make it very clear without any room for ambiguity.

He hasn't done that for you so therefore you have no reason to think any affection he has shown was anything but friendly. He also showed affection in varying levels to Jessamy, Lucienne, and everyone else he was on good terms with. You were not part of the exception but rather the general rule.

Speaking of affection.

"Okay I'm sick of not being able to call you anything. Parent is too impersonal and you know why I don't want to call you father." Jared says as he calls you through the messenger app. It was lunchtime in your location and to keep up with the healthy diet, you and Emira decided to have sushi rolls this time. You both need all the omega 3 fish oil for your brain to function.

"Hey bro, how about Zaza? I found it among the gender neutral terms for parents." Emira responds as you go to the door to pick up the food delivery.

"Hmm that could work. But why Zaza? I can't tell my parents that a woman one year younger than me is technically my father."

"Don't be ridiculous, how about a nickname for a tiktok dance?"

"Neither she nor I have tiktok."

"An ancient goddess?"

"Okay but why? They might think I'm trying to flirt with her which is something I don't want to happen at all."

"A Dungeons and Dragons thing? How come I'm the only one trying to come up with ideas. This is your problem."

"You're more creative than me, sister. Of course you would be able to think of a solution."

"This is supposed to be a team effort."

"Children you're over thinking this." You say towards your phone as you set up and arrange the sushi orders. The california maki for Emira, the Ebi tempura maki for you, and in between the two of you was a large platter of salmon and tuna sashimi with a serving fork for her and serving chopsticks for you.

"Sometimes the most believable stories are the most mundane ones. Jared since our cover story is that we met online through tumblr because of our mutual interest on environmental issues we'll say that one day I was telling you about the fast fashion industry and its effects on the environment."

"...okay but how does that relate to me calling you zaza?"

"Simple, I made a typo that said zaza. You got confused because you've never heard of a brand named zaza and then I realized my mistake, and told you that I meant Zara."

"Oh and you couldn't help but call her zaza ever since then."

"That...actually could work and is very in character of you."

"Also since zaza is still obscure, your biological parents in this time won't know that its your way of showing filial affection towards me."

In your periphery you see Morpheus materialize as he joins you and Emira in the dining table.

"This is going to be embarassing but I need to sleep now and I could use your help in actually going to sleep."

"Didn't I send you the recording?"

"That's the regular version with the English lyrics. I'm trying to relearn some Hebrew."

"The Hebrew version is going to be nothing like the Hebrew we spoke in back in the day."

"It's okay I just want some form of familiarity even though it wouldn't actually be the same thing. And it also helps that in this time you can actually sing."

"Are you saying I couldn't back when I was your father?"

"To be honest I didn't really like it. Or maybe it's because I'm biased towards female singing voices."

"You're biased."

"Oh as if you aren't also biased for instrumentalists."

"Children."

"Sorry mom." "Sorry."

"Jared just give me ... 30 minutes, I can't let this sushi go to waste."

"Of course, there are still some things I need to do before going to bed."

"Okay just keep the call going but we'll just mute ourselves alright."

You turn towards Morpheus who was simply listening on your conversation with your children.

"Morpheus can you please check if Jared has entered the dreaming? I'm going to be singing a relatively short song and sometimes it can take multiple rounds before he actually falls asleep."

"How shall I let you know?"

"Maybe wave or a stop sign with your hand so that I may know when to stop."

"Or perhaps I can come to your side once I sense him in my domain."

"That may startle me. And I would rather not make any sudden shriek after singing the song multiple times." His expression becomes assuring.

"I won't startle you, but I will give you a sign of when you can stop."

"Thank you. Emira I'll go to my bedroom first to sing your brother to sleep. It has better acoustics."

"Okay mom, I'll leave some salmon for you. Can I have the rest of the tuna?"

"Knock yourself out."

You and Morpheus make your way to your bedroom bringing your phone with you and getting into a comfortable position for singing.

"Are you ready?" He nods.

"Jared are you there?"

"Yes -" He yawns before telling you that he was ready to listen.

Making yourself comfortable, you insert your earphones in the jack and point the mic to your mouth as you begin to sing.

"ילדי הטוב והרך [Yeldi hatov ve'harach]

אל תירא ואל תפחד. [Al tira ve'al tifchad]

ילדי, זאת ממני תקבל [Yaldi, zot mimeni tekabel]

רק סיכוי להנצל [rak sikui lehinatsel]

לאל שוב אתפלל [lael shuv etpalel]

הו, אלי! [Ho eli hoshiana]"

Instead of dead silence, you immediately begin a vocalization of the lullaby's melody, transitioning into the actual lullaby part of the song.

"אל נא תבכה, הרדם במנוחה [Al na tivke, heradem bimnucha]

הקשב לאוושת הגלים [Hakshev Leivshat hagalim]

אותך מרדימה בשיר ערש אמך [Otcha mardima beshir eres imcha]

איתך אהיה לעולמים [Itcha ehiyeh le’olamim]

מי הנהר שבנחת קולחים [Mey hanahar shebenachat kolchim]

שמרו על אוצר כה מושלם [Shimru al otsar ko mushlam]

אם תמצאו איזה חוף מבטחים [Im timtseu eize chof niftachim]

אותו נא הביאו לשם. [Oto na haviu lesham]"

As you do a softer version of the vocalization that comes after the lullaby, you take a glance at Morpheus hoping the question in your face is enough for him to read. Thankfully he picks it up quickly.

He mouths to you "Not yet" in a whisper.

You take a breath before starting another round of Yocheved's part in Deliver us. Once again only doing it in Hebrew, as per Jared's request.

After the third round you see Morpheus raise his hand in a stop signal. Jared has entered the dreaming, your job is done.

"Do you still remember speaking Hebrew?"

"Not really. If I peak into my memories I could still understand myself and everything spoken and written in Hebrew but like many skills if it isn't practiced then it isn't retained. I only know the meaning of the song because growing up I first learned it in English. However whenever I do hear Hebrew or any of the past languages that I was fluent in, there is still a sense of nostalgia for me, even if I don't speak or understand them anymore."

"Interesting."

"Is that what it's like for you?"

"No, my ability to understand almost doesn't require language and in a way my abilities as an Endless allow me to converse with anyone no matter what language they speak. But I never had to exert effort to actively learn it."

"I see, and yet another proof that I am not a part of the Endless family."

"You're right, you're much more than that." You were about to ask what he meant when you suddenly feel a headache.

No.

It wasn't a headache.

It's from one of your reincarnated children.

The last one who exists in this period.

"Are you okay?" You can hear the concern in his voice as he helps you lie down.

"Wait - I need to find my child to sense what's going on. Normally a bond wouldn't give me this much pain unless one of them dies or something unusual has happened." You take a deep breath and go into your mental space that held the bonds of your reincarnated children. Among the grey colored bonds only three had a colored glow outlining them. Jared's glow was in between yellow and orange and Emira's glow was in between red and violet.

And this little one's glow was in between coral and pink.

This is the one that was crying out in pain.

You reach out and enter the bond. You aren't sure what your child's name in this lifetime is. But you remember that back in the time of the Assyrian empire your child was a son named Pithyou who worked as a scribe in the empire's beaurocracy. Secretly, he felt out of place in his body and would probably be considered as a transwoman in your current times.

From what you can tell from the bond Pithyou got his wish and was now born into a biosex female. Whatever her name is, she's still a child and hasn't even began puberty yet.

The last accessible memory before the traumatic pain had blocked you off from the most recent memory is your child being hypnotized by a man who appears to be a magic user.

"My parents are going to rescue me and hurt you!"

"I'm counting on that you little brat. Not your parents in this life but your mother."

Oh no.

He knows about you.

"But for the meantime while she's not yet here."

"OUCH! NO! AGH!" The pain that caused your headache has appeared. But more than just pain you feel something happening. Your organs are rearranging and it's as if you are melting.

No.

It wasn't you who was feeling that.

It's your child, your poor child who was being used against you simply because of the bond you shared. A bond that she might not even be aware of yet.

You bring yourself back to your senses, this time both Morpheus and Emira was at your side both sharing a look of concern.

"Mom what happened? Is someone attacking you?"

"No - its even worse. A man is hurting your sister, the last child of mine who is currently reincarnated. He's hurting her knowing I would feel it. He's using her to make me go to him. I don't know what he's doing to her but it's so painful."

"Describe the pain, maybe that will help." Morpheus says in his serious but gentle tone.

"It's as if my - or rather her - organs were being re-arranged and her limbs were melting into her body. I believe that's what's causing her pain."

"Send me the man's face through your conscious thoughts." You did and once his eyes open, all you can see is his determination.

"I will find him and help your daughter."

"No, Morpheus you don't have to do that."

"You're right I don't." He makes his way closer to you.

"But I want to. Let me handle this."

"Mom I think we should follow Lord Morpheus on this one. You said it yourself, whomever this man is he's counting on you to rescue my sibling."

"But I can't let you possibly be in danger again. Not after a century in the Burgess manor."

"I promise I'll be careful. I'll make sure to prepare thoroughly before I do anything. You have a life to live as if you are mortal. Whatever this man wants from you is now the concern of the Endless." You sigh at his stubbornness.

"You're not taking no for an answer are you?"

"Not in this case."

"Agh fine, but you will report to me what is going on. If only to ease my concerns."

"Of course."

And with that he leaves.

"See he cares for you."

"He also cared for Calliope when she was in trouble."

"Hmm interesting how you say he only sees you as a friend and yet he didn't hesitate to help."

"Friends do that Emira." You say with a tone that ends the discussion. All you can do now is hope and pray that he remains safe and that your child is not harmed any further.

Author's notes: And now we enter the final arc before Morpheus and Life officially become a couple. Again some things I want to mention:

1.) Loungewear that I was envisioning;

2.) If you're wondering what the song that Emira and Life were dancing to it's this one: WYAT (Where you at) by SB19. Fun fact that nobody asked for: In this case Life and I are reversed. My bias is Stell and my biaswrecker is Ken aka Felip Jhon Suson. I don't know why but when I was writing that part Life was telling me to write Ken as her bias and Stell as the biaswrecker. And yes there is significance to the song since it's all about reconnections;

3.) Source for the Hebrew lyrics of "Deliver us" and the video reference used. If you want to hear me sing the vocal transitions (disclaimer I am not Jewish nor do I speak Hebrew so there is inevitably going to be mispronunciations on my end).

Copyright people don't come after me this is just for fun - my voice is probably too hoarse for it to even be discernable. I am not making any profit, just wanted to share it.

#Beautiful Anomaly #dream of the endless #morpheus #the sandman netflix #Morpheus x you #Morpheus x reader #morpheus x fem!reader #morpheus x y/n #Dream x you #Dream x y/n

[melanielocke]

The Stars Collide - Chapter 2

  I'm far enough ahead writing (currently working on chapter eight) that I figured I might as well post the next chapter. I hope you enjoy it! After this, I expect updates to be weekly for at least during my pediatrics internships.

Chapterlist

Previous Chapter

Next Chapter (to be posted)

The Fair palace was surrounded by ocean at all sides, connected to different islands only through bridges. Most of the planet was that way, small islands in endless freshwater ocean. Thomas himself had spent much of his childhood in Lightwood, the largest island on the planet, but all nobles had a residence at the palace as well. He would be staying here for now, to settle in with life being married and being an official diplomat. His quarters were likely small compared to the Crown Prince’s, but he hoped Alastair would like it there. If not, he had more space at Lightwood at least. They would have to sell this marriage though, people had to believe it. Thomas didn’t really understand why, everyone knew it was an arranged marriage, but Charlotte had insisted it was important.

Thomas was sitting at the beach. He would be getting married later today. Tonight, Alastair would be moving into his quarters. Quarters that were designed for one person to live in, with only one bedroom, where they’d have to live until Thomas could take him to Lightwood. Until people believed in their marriage.

How had that worked with Charles? Thomas had seen them together at events occasionally, and as far as he could tell they had been on the same page, at least in public. He’d always gotten the sense Alastair had loved Charles from the way he’d looked at his partner. Thomas wasn’t as sure about Charles’ affection, he’d always been guarded with his emotions. A public display of affection was something Charles would consider a weakness.

‘I admit, I’m impressed,’ Lucie said, joining him in the water.

Thomas had always felt it rather relaxing to stand at the side of the ocean, feet into the water. He loved the feeling of the waves as they crashed against his lower legs.

‘That I saved Matthew from a disaster marriage?’

‘Matthew, the treaty,’ Lucie said. ‘Aunt Charlotte was stressed out since she never believed she could convince Matthew, yet didn’t know who else she could ask to marry Alastair. But will you be alright, Tom?’

‘I’m sure we can figure it out,’ Thomas said. ‘As you said, the treaty is what matters. No matter what else happens, Alastair will get that. The trick to this thing is good, open communication.’

Lucie snorted. ‘Well, then you’re screwed.’

‘Excuse me?’

‘You waited until you were twenty two to tell your mother you don’t like being babied during your fever episodes,’ Lucie said. ‘Because you were scared you’d hurt her feelings. Marriage is going to be a disaster if you approach it the same way.’

‘But I did tell her in the end,’ Thomas said, kicking some water up at Lucie.

Lucie kicked some water back at him. ‘My point is, you’ve gotten too used to being the convenient, nice friend who is always there for others and has no needs or wants of his own.’

Thomas sighed. ‘Since when are you a trained psychologist?’

Lucie shrugged. ‘I’m a writer and I have a book coming out next month. Understanding people is like half my job. And I’ve known you all your life, Thomas. You’re my best friend. And as your friend, I am offering you free couple’s counselling, which I am totally qualified for since the main character in my book also enters a disaster relationship that works out at the end.’

‘Thanks.’

‘I think my next book will feature an arranged marriage. It’s just such a good trope, you know? Working out your feelings and such while being stuck together, not to mention people trying to kill you.’

‘I should hope no one tries to kill me.’

‘You never know,’ Lucie said. ‘But if so, you can use one of my charms.’

Lucie was a witch, trained by her mother to create charms and potions to help the people of Fair. While people born without a talent for magic could become witches, it often took a very long time and Lucie was one of the few people born with the skills. It was difficult for her sometimes, pressured to use her talents while her dream was to be a writer, but Lucie had found a way to combine the two.

The main difference between science and magic was that magic wasn’t fully understood yet. Scientists were working at that though, and Christopher often worked with Lucie to help improve her charms and potions using his knowledge of science. Thomas found it all too complicated to follow. He was a linguist, not a chemist.

‘Thank you,’ Thomas said. ‘But no one is trying to kill me. I think that might be an interesting plot point in your book, but in reality nothing like that will happen.’

‘Sure,’ Lucie said. ‘Still though, you don’t think Charles’ death is strange?’

‘He died of a stroke,’ Thomas said. ‘That seems like a pretty clear cause of death.’

‘Yet not common among people his age according to Eugenia.’

Eugenia was Thomas’ older sister, who had just finished med school. She had started working in surgery. Thomas didn’t think she worked with stroke patients. Lucie usually asked her for advice whenever she needed something medical in her books. Fortunately for Lucie, injuries and broken bones were among Eugenia’s expertise.

‘How would you give someone a stroke on purpose?’

‘I’m a witch, remember?’ Lucie said. ‘There are all sort of abilities and technology out there that could do something like this. With Christopher’s help, all sorts of weird things become possible.’   

‘Compared to a thirty year old man having a stroke, Charles being killed with magic seems unlikely,’ Thomas countered. ‘Pretty sure Charles smoked like a chimney anyway.’

‘Perhaps,’ Lucie said. ‘I don’t know, I guess I’m just trying to make sense of it. Even if none of us actually liked Charles, I would never have wished for him to die so young.’

Thomas nodded. ‘I guess that’s true.’ He looked down at his phone to check the time and his eyes went wide. ‘I need to get going, I still have to get dressed.’

The wedding planning had been rushed through the past few days. Thomas had been somewhat involved, but he hadn’t seen Alastair anywhere near. Frankly, considering the situation he really didn’t care about the flavor of cake or the seating arrangement, but Thomas guessed he likely wouldn’t get married again, so he had tried his best to put effort into it. For their marriage to be recognized politically, they would need at least one witness from Turan. It was a three day journey so Thomas had hurried and sent an invitation to Alastair’s sister Cordelia.

‘Good plan,’ Lucie said. ‘I’ll help you. Who is going to walk with you? Your mother or your father? I imagine Alastair doesn’t have anyone to walk with him. Oh no, that sounds so sad.’

***

Thomas wasn’t at his quarters when Alastair stopped by to drop off his belongings. He’d hoped to make his acquaintance before the wedding tonight, but it seemed Thomas was someplace else. Eager to escape him, Alastair guessed. Who would want to be chained to him after all?

He spent his time getting ready, hoping perhaps Thomas would still be there before the wedding, but in the end he figured he might as well get going. He didn’t want to be late to his own wedding, no point in waiting here for Thomas. Alastair could ask him about his expectations later. Or perhaps that was a stupid idea, after his marriage to Charles he did have some ideas of what his future husband would be expecting of him.

‘Alastair!’

Alastair recognized that voice anymore. What had happened, why was she here? He hadn’t seen her in years. He wanted nothing more than to be close to her again, but after not speaking for six years he didn’t think that was possible anymore. What was he supposed to say to her?

‘Cordelia,’ he said slowly.

‘Where have you been?’ she yelled. ‘I’ve tried calling you so many times. I’ve called everyone at the Fair Palace and no one could tell me where to reach you and the last time I got the opportunity to come here you and Charles were away for the whole week.’

‘I’ve been busy,’ Alastair said stiffly. ‘Maintaining diplomatic relations. Charles’ advisors thought it might put us at risk if we kept in touch.’

‘Who cares what Charles’ advisors think? I’m your sister, they don’t get to shut me out of your life just because you’re in an important position.’

‘It’s not so simple, Cordelia,’ Alastair said. ‘Relations between Turan and the Fair Planet aren’t always easy and they were worried I might spill state secrets.’

It wasn’t a sufficient explanation, Alastair knew that. He couldn’t say he perfectly understood it himself, but Charles had been insistent that Alastair didn’t contact his family, that it would be bad for their position, the treaty, everything. Charles had known what he was doing. Charles wouldn’t have wanted Alastair to leak his secrets to the people of Turan. And sure, Alastair was careful, he would never leak anything on purpose, but accidents happened and how was he to know what needed to be kept secret? Charles had known what was best.

‘How would not speaking to people from Turan make it any better?’ Cordelia demanded. ‘If anything, it makes you seem disconnected from your people, from your home. Aren’t you supposed to represent Turan here? And I missed you, Alastair. Maman missed you. You weren’t there for Father’s funeral. Rostam never even met you.’

Alastair took a step back. ‘Who is Rostam?’

He’d known about his father’s death, had read about it in the papers. Military accident, although Alastair suspected Father might have caused it himself by drinking on duty. Charles had told him not to go, and Alastair was grateful for it. After everything he’d been through due to his father, he did not think he could have stomached it. But who was Rostam?

‘Your little brother,’ Cordelia said, tears in her eyes. ‘You didn’t even know? Maman found out she was pregnant not long after you got married. We’ve tried to contact you, but there was no getting through to you and Rostam isn’t old enough to fly.’

It was considered unsafe for children under twelve to fly in outer space. It was done occasionally, but most people preferred to avoid it and his mother would never have taken her child on a flight, nor would she have left him at home to come search from him. And Alastair had never known the child existed at all. Had Charles known, had he kept this from him? Charles had handled all communication with Alastair’s family, until they’d stopped contacting them altogether. He must have left it out to keep them safe, Alastair told himself. Charles never did anything without a reason.

‘I’m sorry,’ Alastair said softly. ‘I’ll see if I can schedule a visit to Turan sometime. But you have to understand my duty is here.’

‘You could make a videocall at least,’ Cordelia said. ‘It’s just your family, no one could blame you for wanting to speak to them. And Charles isn’t around anymore to tell you what to do. Seriously, what kind of husband would forbid you from speaking to your family?’

‘You don’t understand,’ Alastair bit out. ‘Charles only wanted what was best for us. I’m sorry I didn’t call you, but it wasn’t his fault.’

‘Good. Are you okay, Alastair? I know it can’t have been easy to lose your partner. Do you know Thomas Lightwood? Perhaps he’ll be better for you.’

‘I’ll ask him if I can call Maman,’ Alastair said. ‘But I’m fine, you don’t have to worry about me.’  

Taglist: @alastaircarstairsdefenselawyer @thefoxandthefound @life-through-the-eyes-of @styxdrawings @justanormaldemon @ipromiseiwillwrite @a-dream-dirty-and-bruised @amchara @all-for-the-fanfiction@imsoftforthomastair @ddepressedbookworm @queenlilith43 @wagner-fell @cant-think-of-anything @laylax13s @tessherongraystairs

#Alastair Carstairs #Thomas Lightwood #Lucie Herondale #Cordelia Carstairs #the last hours #tlh #fanfiction #the stars collide

[kitterary]

Book Review: You Shouldn’t Have Come Here by Jeneva Rose

Full transparency: I listened to the audiobook version of this book while driving home from a fun Halloween weekend after seeing one of my favorite bands live two nights in a row, and suffering from post-concert blues.   I opened the Libby app (support your local library!) hoping for something spooky to listen to and settled on this as it was the first thriller available.  The book did a great job of keeping me fully entertained for the entire 7 ½ hour drive home… because it was like watching a car wreck you couldn’t look away from.  This being said, I don’t have a physical copy to reference back to in case I make a mistake on something that happens in the book.

The book follows Grace Evans, just your typical bookworm loner gal who selects her solo vacations by throwing a dart at a dartboard and going wherever the dart lands (except all this is a lie, but we’ll get to that) and Calvin Wells, sad tragic backstory country boy running an Airbnb out of his ranch to ease his loneliness (also a lie) and their budding romance while the entire town feels like it’s falling apart around them. The book goes back and forth between these two character viewpoints.

Grace gets to her vacation home and *to no one’s surprise* she has no cell phone signal and no wi-fi access. (Why does she not question how Calvin is running an Airbnb without wi-fi?)  There IS a working landline phone, which Grace never uses until towards the end of the book despite saying that she needed to text her friend to let them know she made it safely.  Grace DOES, however, have enough signal to stream Spotify while taking a run up and down the driveway, which is the point where I realized this was not going to be a good book.

I have so many random complaints about the writing of this book. Grace’s identity is that she loves books, so much so that she just *had* to describe exactly why she chose the books that she wants to read and why she’s reading them in the order she’s reading them, and yet she sat and read her book once for maybe 20 minutes.  But a huge “clue” for Calvin being a liar was that he also apparently liked to read but she never saw him read, as if the man didn’t literally run a farm on his own and spend all of his alone time trying to woo Grace.

This book has too many characters and WAY too much going on for its own good.  There’s jealous childhood friend who can’t get over the one night stand she has with Calvin who straight up tells Grace she hopes she dies, Calvin’s estranged brother who may or may not have purposefully killed Calvin’s ex-girlfriend a year before, an older lady who runs the local clothing shop who acts as Calvin’s mother but also is off her medication, which apparently means she is not to be trusted?  Then there are Calvin’s dead parents who went from just dying in a fire to the mother murdering the father and then setting the house on fire while she was still inside, which was meant to act as a shock to the reader but it had literally nothing to do with what was actually happening in the book. Many of the characters also make passive comments about the house potentially being haunted so you sit and wonder if that’s true (unfortunately not). Random mountain lion attack? Yep. Falling into a pit of animal corpses that also, just like 90% of the events of this book, has no relevance to the plot? Check.  The only side plot that matters in any way was the missing girl who was supposed to be a previous Airbnb guest of Calvin’s.  This alone would have been a plenty interesting plot without everything else but I truly feel like the author didn’t know what direction they wanted to go in, so they included everything.

Then the ending happens.  Turns out, Grace isn’t Grace but is actually using an alias because she’s a serial killer and goes to Airbnb’s to murder their hosts and it just turns out that Calvin also happened to be a serial killer.  I don’t HATE the ending but it felt almost out of nowhere.  Other than one offhand moment Calvin makes about Grace acting like a different person while they were all drinking at a bar, there was no build up to this happening at all, and it just felt like the author couldn’t figure out how to end the book in a way where Not Grace and the missing girl that was being held captive live at the end. I don’t read thrillers, but according to other reviews I’ve read this is apparently a cop-out kind of ending.  I could definitely see that being true.

Final review: I shouldn’t have read this book. 2/5 for simply being so absurd it made a 7 ½ hour drive less boring.

#book review #you shouldn't have come here #bookish

[holdshiguresohmaaccountable]

people who are valid:

-people who like shigure

-people who dislike shigure

people who are not valid:

-shigure

#fruits basket #shigure sohma #i hope this and my previous posts settle where i stand on this matter #i really dont want to have to make a post that actually states this is a joke blog hes a 2d anime man how problematic can he get

[kaidenya]

Getting Caught ✧ MHA

Description: Headcanons for getting caught in a intimate moment with Hitoshi Shinso, Tenya Iida, Mirio Togata, & Tomura Shigaraki

WARNING: NSFW, suggestive content NOTE: This is a repost of an old SHITPOST headcanon I had on my previous account so if this looks familiar I hope you enjoy it the second time around!

“Nobody will know...”

Shinso

Shinso would go to his grave claiming that you were to blame for this situation

But in all honesty, he had been allowing things to build for far too long

You two weren’t necessarily a secret, but most people just assumed you were bEsT fRiEnDs 🥴

It was an honest misunderstanding

You had decided to keep physical contact to a minimum after an unfortunate attempt at holding his hand left you believing he didn’t enjoy any forms of PDA.

Shinso had just assumed the same about you.

However, as the two of you grew more serious, you found it more difficult to keep your hands to yourself

It just so happened your boyfriend had been working extremely hard in the hero course and it s h o w e d

You had found yourself admiring his changing physique and in turn, found you weren’t the only one admiring your boyfriend.

You weren’t necessarily jealous— you trusted him more than anything, but he tended to be socially constipated

And nobody seemed to know about you. Thus giving the other interested parties an unintentional greenlight to flirt with him. And there was one girl that had stood out among the sea of suitors.

Each time you saw the second-year girl perch next to Shinso it made your skin crawl, but no lines had been crossed.

Until they were.

Your knuckles were gripping the strap of your bag so tightly it ached when you made your way to where your boyfriend was perched outside

The second-year didn’t even acknowledge you as she continued her flirtatious ways and you don’t resist the urge to roll your eyes as you settle into the place next to him.

He had flashes you a lazy smile before focusing back on his phone screen.

Then her hand landed on his upper thigh

Let me tell you: sleepy boy was shocked when she touched him, but he was EVEN MORE SHOCKED when you took her by the wrist and tossed her hand to the side

You waste no time threading your fingers with his, rising to your feet and all but hauling him from his seat

His amusement only grew as he realized just how jealous you had gotten, a smirk forming over his lips as he set to teasing you

‘What’s the matter, kitty? You don’t like anyone touching daddy?’

NO, YOU DO NOT

You have no idea how you ended up on your knees in a supply closet??

Shinso is feeling very sure of himself above you, using the hand that was gripping the back of your neck as leverage to hold you down on his length

k i n g of dirty talk 🤭

Absolutely cannot help himself when it comes to telling you how pretty you look choking on his cock

Honestly doesn’t last long, but what do you expect? Seeing your jealous and possessive response to the girl he had given little to no acknowledgment had lit a fire in his chest

He was desperate to get his hands on you, to remind you that he was just as much yours as you were his.

And when he does— oh MAN he makes you forget all about the second-year girl

He has one of your legs draped over his shoulder as he goes down on you, licking and sucking at you in a way that had you trembling

You accidentally knock over a pile of brooms and mops, neither of you paying them any mind as your head lulled in bliss

If only you had remembered to flick the lock on the door…

Kirishima really thought someone was banging on the door for help. It wouldn’t have been manly— or heroic not to make sure someone wasn’t in trouble

Besides, why else would someone be making so much noise in a supply closet if they weren’t stuck??

So when the door swung open and he locked eyes with you, still panting and moaning as an all too familiar head of purple hair buried further into your heat—

He let out the loudest shout he could muster. Apologies poured from his mouth as he fumbled to shut the door

However, your boyfriend made no move to let you go. Instead, he hummed against your skin, only leaning back to nip at your inner thigh before speaking in a heavy voice

‘Better make this fast, kitty.’

Iida

So you’ve tried to keep your relationship on the down-low bc Iida doesn’t want anyone to think he’s distracted

We all know he just doesn’t wanna be called out for his obvious favoritism

Before you got together you were constantly pushing him, breaking minuscule rules in favor of gaining his attention. Nothing too immoral, but enough to get under his skin.

Like slipping into class just seconds after the bell had rung, nearly avoiding Aizawa’s attention, but never making it past Iida.

Or when a class had gotten a bit too stressful, the room filling with hot air as tensions rose and you had to pop open a few buttons of your uniform top

Then there was your favorite offense; desk sitting. If there was one sure way to get a reaction from your stickler of a boyfriend it was to place yourself on top of a desk.

Which is what you found yourself doing at the end of an unfavorable week. The two of you hadn’t gotten a moment together outside of your studies and you were growing needy.

So with a few moments of free time before class began, you decided to chat with Tsu and Uraraka, settling atop the desk between them when you had grown tired of standing

The desk belonging to none other than Tenya

Your ankles were crossed as you leaned forward to speak with Tsuyu and he was beyond s h o o k

Immediate hand chopping.

He’s towering over you, ranting about how your behavior was improper while keeping his hands clenched in an attempt to keep from running his fingertips along your thighs.

When was the last time you were this close to him? It had to have been longer than he realized for him to have such a strong reaction— are you biting your lip??

Any response between you died off as Aizawa addressed the class and you were sent back to your seat, leaving Iida far more frazzled than you realized

The moment class ends he has you tucked under an empty stairwell to continue his lecture

Only he doesn’t get very far

Tenya Iida has an authority kink. I take no criticism.

When you look up at him from under your lashes, muttering the words ‘yes sir’ as he chastised you, his resolve was shattered

Has you pressed against the wall immediately, fisting your blazer as he dips to press his forehead to yours

‘Why must you push me?’

Doesn’t even let you answer before his mouth is covering yours, hips arching to grind his obvious arousal against you

Knowing he had been just as affected by your as you had him was enough to spur a moan past your lips and he takes the chance to slide his tongue into your mouth

Although he was MORTIFIED at the impropriety of it all, he couldn’t resist the sweet noises you made as he expertly worked against you

His hand eventually slides between you, pushing past the waistband of your bottoms and grinding his palm against you teasingly

‘Now, who do you belong to, darling?’

You you youyouyou—

Your hand was rubbing along Iida’s hard cock, his length straining against his pants to the point you’re almost worried they’ll rip

Somehow the two of you had been so lost in one another that you hadn’t heard the door open at the top of the stairwell

Denki and Mineta honestly weren’t creeping this time— they just wanted a snack from the vending machine adjacent to you!

Got a whole ass meal instead 👁👄👁

A moan tore from your throat, quickly being smothered by Tenya’s parted lips as you came on his fingers

You had barely made out the echoing sound of objects clattering to the ground through the ringing in your ears

But your boyfriend had heard

His lips separated from you in an instant, shocked gaze shifting into something closer to anger as he recognized your classmates

Denki began stammering out an apology, looking close to short-circuiting as his attention flickered between you

Mineta had let his gaze linger on you for too long. His eyes taking in the way your exposed chest— Tenya must have pulled the buttons loose

You cringe away from his gaze, post-orgasm haze™ spurring you to tuck yourself closer to Tenya to avoid their stares rather than snap at them

It was your obvious discomfort that had kicked Iida into gear, twisting to thread your button your blouse together before rounding on the others

If embarrassment wasn’t enough, the thought of them having seen you in such a vulnerable position had him seething as he began his lecture

Attempts hand chopping them into submission, but they kept disregarding his words in favor of catching another glimpse of you in a fucked out state

All fondness for his classmates had vanished as he stepped into their line of sight, shielding you from their gazes. His eyes almost daring them to continue

Whatever words lingering on their tongues died off, heads bowing in shame as they agreed to keep the entire situation to themselves

After all, the potential wrath of Tenya Iida was not something to be taken lightly.

Mirio

Mirio’s love language is touch, without a doubt, so it’s honestly surprising when he’s NOT trying to get handsy with you

He’s always defended his obvious displays of affection by claiming he had so little free time— he’d be a fool to waste the opportunity to touch you!

Mirio jumped at the opportunity to feel you against him. Whether it was a heavy kiss to your lips after walking you to class, a hand slipping under your shirt to caress your back, or his fingers trailing teasingly along your thigh.

However, as much as he was attentive, he was also forgetful.

It was because of that forgetfulness that you found yourself alone in your dorm. Countless boxes of takeout were lined up on your desk and a pre-planned movie was ready to play on your small tv.

After a few hours and countless delivered messages, you succumbed to disappointment.

The following day Mirio can’t seem to figure out why you’re avoiding him, but he refuses to give up without a fight.

Definitely thinks it’s a game of some sort and takes it upon himself to break your silent streak

It wasn’t easy being upset with Mirio. He had an uncanny ability to brighten any room he stepped into and being irrevocably in love with him only strengthened his effect

He’s always hard for you and loves letting you know just how you affect him— so why not place a hand on your hand, pressing firmly against your back when he slips past?

You always look so stunning— why not feed you compliments at every given moment?

How could he not look at you with the most iNTENSE GAZE undressing you with his eyes in front of everyone?

It’s when he realizes that you aren’t reacting to his teasing and flirtatious behaviorist that he caves.

He finds you between classes, stirring you away from the crowd, despite your wordless protests. It isn’t until you’re tucked away in an abandoned hall that he finally asks what was wrong

You had fully intended on dragging it out, allowing anger to push you on. But he spoke to you in the softest voice, looked at you with eyes filled with so much devotion that it was nearly overwhelming

He is shocked when you shove him away— were you tearing up??

Actually gets super defensive because he doesn’t realize HES the one that made you upset

Once you finally cave and remind him about the date he had missed it hits him like a freight train.

The two of you so rarely got time together and he had stood you up.

‘I’m so sorry, baby. I’ve been so busy lately— I didn’t realize I was neglecting you.’

Does not waste time making it up to you. He cups your face in his hands as he starts placing soft kisses on your face, cooing softly as tears roll down your cheeks

Did somebody say praise kink?

How can you stay mad at him when he’s telling you how sorry he is and that he loves you and you’re the only one his dick will get hard for??

It isn’t long before he’s pinned you between him and the wall, hitching your legs around his waist while coaxing you into a heavy kiss

His hips flex to grind against you, his hot length slotting between your thighs as he digs his fingertips into the curve of your ass

Mirio does not care that somebody could see— his quirk leaves him naked all the time and he’s shameless 🥵

But again he’s so forgetful—

And he was meant to go straight to class 1A to talk with them alongside the other members of The Big Three

So when he didn’t show up Aizawa had sent Tamaki and Midoriya in search of their future number one hero

How were you supposed to know they would turn the corner just as you arched from the wall?

Mirio had no idea anyone was there as he used the hand that was wrapped around your throat as leverage to grind you over the edge—

bOY were you embarrassed when you heard the two boys audibly g a s p

Midoriya’s embarrassment nearly gave Tamaki a run for his money. You were quick to turn away, immediately hiding your face in his chest as he greeted the duo in an overly cheerful voice

Absolutely teases the three of you over the incident FOREVER!!

Shigaraki

Shigaraki was obsessed with you.

There was no way around how infatuated he had become and it only seemed to grow alongside your relationship

He was touch starved. The moment you began giving him physical affection and attention it was game over

He had no shame, especially when it came to his desire for you, which is how you often found yourself perched on his lap no matter the company.

That being said, the leader of the League of Villains became intolerable when the two of you were separated for long.

And a recent spiral of events has prevented you from returning to the hideout, thus leaving the others to deal with him

You weren’t expected to return until the following week. Aside from texting Shigaraki endlessly (didn’t he have anything better to do?) and assuring Twice and Toga that you’d be returning as soon as possible, you hadn’t had much contact with the League

Shigaraki was wound up tight, lashing out at the others far more than usual. That was how he ended up sitting at the bar, Father concealing his annoyance as Kurogiri took over the meeting.

And suddenly you were walking in, muttering a quick apology before taking the only available seat beside Toga

Shigaraki could not keep his eyes off of you, something that doesn’t go unnoticed by the others. It was the most present he had been since you left.

Of course, that meant Dabi has also noticed and never missing an opportunity to mess with their ruthless leader he shifted closer from his place behind you, muttering small talk into your ear

There is no doubt in my mind that Shigaraki was staring at you both like 😠 behind Father

Luckily the meeting had been wrapping up upon your arrival and the group was dismissed, many leaving to handle their own business.

However, the moment you had leaped to your feet Tomura had vanished from the room

With a sigh you moved over to the bar, sliding into the seat that had once been occupied by your man and Kurogiri placed a drink before you

By the time you had downed the last bit the bar had gotten eerily quiet, though when you shifted to speak to the Misty Man he was already looking over your shoulder. With a single nod, he had left the room.

The moment he was gone leather artist gloves shoved under your top, your heart racing at the all too familiar feeling as a palm settled between your shoulders

‘I’ve missed you, pet.’

There was a harsh tone to his voice, but it was contradicted by the trail of open-mouthed kisses he pressed along your neck and shoulder

Your entire body arched against him, head craning back to catch a glimpse of him, smiling widely as you met his gaze and returned the sentiment

A scoff slid past his lips, though you could see the amusement dancing in his gaze as his hand reached around to wrap around your throat

Despite the gloves, he kept a pinky in the air

His mouth covers yours in a sloppy kiss as his hips jolt sharply against you, knocking you against the countertop

Absolutely cannot control himself as he ruts against you, wasting little to no time in pushing your bottoms down past your thighs

Heat pooled in your stomach as his free hand reached between you to pull himself from his jeans

His dick slid between your thighs, a throaty whine sliding past your lips and despite the slick from your arousal the thick head stretched you perfectly

You had been completely lost in him, moaning and whining freely as he continued to rut against you.

There was a click throughout the room, similar to the door handle being twisted and your attention was adverted to the source

However, Shigaraki was faster.

He grabbed the back of your head and using his hold as leverage to press your face flat against the bar-top while his other hand worked against your sensitive center. A loud moan that was undoubtedly his name tumbled past your lips

‘There’s my little slut— louder, make sure they know who makes you feel this good.’

Unbeknownst to you, the person he wanted to be sure knew you were his had entered the room, Tomura meeting his gaze with a smirk as you began chanting his name like a prayer

A harsh thrust of his hips sent you over the edge as you came on his cock, filthy praises slipping past his lips as his hot release rolled down your thighs

He placed another sloppy kiss on the back of your neck before parting from you.

The moment you lift your head and begin adjusting yourself you lock eyes with Dabi

Embarrassed didn’t even begin to explain how you felt as Tomura let out a loud laugh, reaching down to pull your bottoms up after he had tucked himself away

‘Go wait on my bed while I speak with Dabi and I may let you come on my tongue.’

You wasted no time hurrying away from the two, heart pounding from both excitement and humiliation as you rushed to do as you were told

#iida x reader #mirio x reader #shigaraki x reader #shinso x reader #tenya x reader #mirio headcanons #iida headcanons #shinso headcanons #shigaraki headcanons #my hero academia #my heado academia headcanons

[taestefully-in-luv]

Always You | JJK (Two)

Summary: you and Jungkook have been best friends since freshmen year of college, there’s a lot of unsaid feelings and tension but neither make a move. what happens when his friend Taehyung (also your crush) needs a fake girlfriend?

Pairing: Jungkook x Female reader, slight Taehyung x Reader

Genre: friends to lovers, idiots to lovers, roommate au, college au, SMUT (starting ch2), fluff, angst (in later chapters) slight crack, lots of drama

Word Count: 9.3k

Warnings: Swearing, alcohol consumption, oc is a bad friend:(, sexual tension (?), body image issues, oc is feeling a lil insecure, mentions of sex, sounds of sex, crying, male masturbation, fantasy includes: spanking and vaginal intercourse.

Notes: thanks for the love for the first part…heres part 2! I hope everyone enjoys:) get ready for drama to come hahaha. If you wanted to be added to the taglist just send me an ask or whatevs, and feel free to send one if you want to discuss the story!

Taglist: @monvieesdaebak @mooniyooni @thisartemisnevermisses @giadalin @kookiebunny097 @cosmosjk @moonchild1 @just-jeon @anpanman-sonyeondan @starlight-night0 @yessii-i

© taestefully-in-luv

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Gentleman: “A civilized, educated, sensitive, or well-mannered man.” Is how the dictionary defines the word but if you were to look up the term in your own dictionary it would just be a picture of Taehyung’s handsome as hell face.

Opening the car door, pulling your chair out, holding your hand, softly gripping your waist, making you feel like the only one in the room—Taehyung is doing everything right. Your mind should be overwhelmed with the thought of Taehyung. He should be filling your every sense, he should be the only thing you can understand. He should be. But every time his perfect lips land on the skin of your cheek, your mind somehow finds Jungkook. That son of a bitch.

There’s a string of warm lights dangling on the restaurants brick walls, and it’s almost picture perfect but one of the bulbs is out and it’s making the scene less ideal. Your eyes keep going back to the one bulb that refuses to shine. You just want everything to be perfect.

“I know I already told you…” Taehyung is sitting across from you, his gentle smile making your heart flutter, “But you look so pretty tonight.”

You know you should be gazing into his chocolate eyes but you can’t keep your eyes from shifting towards that stupid ass bulb. All the other bulbs are lit up just fucking fine but this bulb wants to be difficult. It just hasto go against everyone else. Your eyes narrow at the string of lights and you scoff. This stupid bulb reminds you of someone.

Taehyung brought you to a decently fancy restaurant, the food is alright but he says the main attraction is the monster baked cookie with ice cream melting over the top. He is excited like a child at the mention of his favorite dessert, you can’t help but smile fondly towards him.

“So…” Taehyung slides the dessert closer to you, “I never asked but how did Jungkook take the whole not really talking in public thing?”

Your eyes shoot up to the stupid bulb and you blink at it a few times. “I…” Your gaze drifts back to him. “I didn’t tell him.”

Taehyung drops his napkin at the news, his eyes slightly widening as he processes your words.

“We just aren’t talking right now.”

You wince as the words leave your mouth, but it’s true. You are a coward who is just ignoring her best friend because you don’t have the balls to face him. You don’t have the balls to forgive him and you definitely don’t have the balls to inform him that he’s out of the picture for a month. Because you don’t have the balls to admit to yourself you chose a boy over your friend. Basically you’re just a bitch with no balls!

“Yeah, he isn’t really talking to me either.” Taehyung chuckles bitterly, “He’s really against this…I mean, I knew he was protective over you but—”

“Protective my ass.” You lean back in your chair, “He’s just being stupid.”

Taehyung looks at you and frowns. It makes you want to kiss his pouting lips.

“But thank you.”

Taehyung’s quizzical expression makes you snort,

“For the compliment. Thank you. You look really handsome as well.” You smile, your hand sliding across the table to hold his. You gently squeeze and pull back, letting go. Taehyung smiles at you but something strange settles in his eyes. He’s struck with an awkward expression as he forces another smile, his lips pulled together tightly.

“Thanks y/n” He opens his mouth then closes then opens, “For doing this. Seriously, thank you.”

“Well, you’re kind of supplying me with free coffee.” You laugh into your hand.

“Regardless,” Taehyung leans back in his chair, “You’re a good friend.”

Right. Friend... But you feel optimistic you will flee this place! The god forsaken friend zone! You smile at Taehyung, grabbing your fork and cutting into the cookie with it. You stare into Taehyung’s dark eyes as you bring the fork to your lips—okay yes, you are most definitely trying to make this sexy—you open your mouth wide and wrap you lips around the piece of cookie, you never break contact with Taehyung. You chew slowly and roll your eyes to the back of your head, like the dramatic ass bitch you are. You open an eye to see his reaction, you see him gulp and a small smile begins forming on his lips.

“mmm” you moan again.

“RIGHT?!”

~~~

“We got some pretty insta worthy photos!” Taehyung chuckles into your hair as he pulls back from the hug. “I would say tonight was a success!”

Right. A success. Because this is all for show. To get this Anna girl off his back. Not because he likes you or anything. You can’t help but feel disappointed in his words.

“That’s good Tae.” Your hands linger on his back, not wanting to let go completely. “I’ll see you tomorrow right?”

“And the next day and the next day,” he teases, “And don’t forget this weekend is the pool party at my friend Jin’s house.” Then Taehyung nibbles on his lips, “Jungkook is going…so you should probably talk to him.”

You probably should of figured Jungkook is going to go…but that doesn’t stop you from feeling shocked. You should tell him he needs to lay low in public for a month but you guys aren’t talking already so do you really have to have that discussion with him?

“We’ll see.”

Taehyung steps forward and grabs your hand, “y/n…I know I said no Jungkook but I really just meant that you two aren’t all over each other in public…you don’t have to ignore him at home too…I’m sure he isn’t feeling great about it. And honestly, it makes me feel guilty too.” He admits softly, his hand feels sweaty in yours.

“He’s an asshole.” You let go of his hand, you feel your chest tighten and you hate yourself.

“Why?”

“It doesn’t matter. I should get inside now.”

“Okay…” Taehyung leans in for another quick hug and places a kiss on your forehead. You wish you could enjoy it but on the other side of this forehead are thoughts of Jungkook. Once again, that son of a bitch.

~~~

The next few days pass quickly, you and Taehyung have gone on two more dates.

The second date felt like a movie—it was classic and dreamy. Taehyung picked you up and drove you over to the next town that was having a carnival. You walked around holding hands, eating cotton candy and laughing at his jokes. The night ended with the ferris wheel, where you two got some insta worthy pictures—one shot including his lips on yours.

It felt so surreal. He posted it on Instagram that night with the caption ‘Her’ with purple hearts and within a couple hours there were at least 50 comments congratulating the two of you.

Third date you two went to a drive in theater. You fed each other popcorn, talked over the radio’s audio and took snaps to prove your date to the world.

This week has been nothing short of amazing. Taehyung is absolutely perfect. You feel like the only girl in the world with him. Like you don’t have to compete with anyone. Unfortunately, the week may have felt amazing on the outside, on the inside it’s been…weird.

The weird part of this week is the lack of Jungkook. Your usual cereal at noon on Tuesdays didn’t happen, your usual weekly episode of My Hero didn’t happen, your usual chit chat and banter didn’t occur. Just silence and awkward passes.

It’s all your doing though…Jungkook has tried. He still sat at the breakfast table munching on Apple Jacks while you passed him by, walking out your front door to meet Taehyung. He saved this week’s episode to your list so you could watch it. He has sent you multiple texts saying he’s sorry and he misses you but you ignored them. You have purposely started putting a distance between the two of you and it makes you uncomfortable.

You remind yourself that, besides doing this because Taehyung requested it, it is also for the best.

~~~

You sit at the edge of your bed staring at the bouquet of flowers Taehyung had sent you this morning. You eye the flowers, taking in their gorgeous appearance. They’re open and full and colorful. But why do you look at them and feel disappointed?

They seem to be begging for water, so you stand to your feet and grab the bouquet. You head for the kitchen to find your mothers crystal vase so you can place the beautiful flowers in it.

Jungkook is sitting at the breakfast table, slurping on some noodles and playing on his phone. You completely ignore him as you walk into the kitchen.

You stand on your tip toes to try to reach the vase in the cupboard but it’s too high for you. God damn it, you think. There’s no way in hell you’re asking Jungkook for help, no way in hell!

*about 10 pathetic seconds later*

“Jungkook, will you help me?”

You don’t even turn around to face him, you just raise your voice so hears you. Yeah, you’re a coward. You hear the screech of the chair against the tiled floor and you shiver. Jungkook doesn’t say anything as he walks up behind you, his chest coming flush against your back and you swear if he tried to pay attention he could probably feel your heartbeat through the contact. You stay frozen as he reaches his arms above you and grabs the vase. He must of just done laundry because his detergent fills your nostrils, its clean and refreshing. He sets the vase down on the counter and he continues to stand closely behind you, his scent now overwhelming your senses.

“These flowers are pretty.” He leans down to say in your ear. His hand coming down to hold on to your waist. “But you only like tulips.”

You can’t help but roll your eyes, “These are fine too.”

“Yeah, they are.” He admits. “But they’re not what you want.” He squeezes your waist, then he’s backing away from your body and a chill is left behind as he gets further away. It’s like the further he walks away from you the colder you become. As if Jungkook is the source of your warmth.

~~~

It’s Saturday afternoon and you are finally done getting ready. Taehyung is taking you out to a pool party today, hosted by one of his close friends—Jim? No, Jin. You know you’ve heard Jungkook talk about him before but haven’t gotten the chance to meet him since he’s a bit older and already graduated.

You look in the mirror as you tug your oversized shirt over your shorts. Underneath is a plain black bikini but unfortunately today is not a good day—you’re bloated as hell and it shows. At least you think it does. You continue to rate yourself in the mirror when Jungkook walks past your room.

“Didn’t know you were so self obsessed.” He pops in to say.

You turn to face him and as soon as he sees your frustrated expression he knows you’re on the verge of waterworks.

“Woah woah, whats wrong?” Jungkook is quick to rush to your side. You’ve been ignoring him for a week yet he still rushes to you when you need him. You’re a god damn bitch.

“I feel fat but I have a pool party to attend to and—”

“You’re going to that too…?” Jungkook eyes the ground under his feet. He sounds disappointed.

You try to steady your breathing but you feel a breakdown coming and Jungkook can sense it too.

“You’re not fat.” He states plainly.

“You wouldn’t know with these clothes I’m wearing.” You try to reason.

“Then take them off and show me.” He’s obviously aware of the bathing suit underneath but still, his words do something strange to you.

“No, I’m ugly.” Is all you respond with.

“y/n I don’t have time for this, either show me or like, don’t go.”

“Fine!”

You begin unbuttoning your shorts, painfully slow. He watches as you fumble with the zipper as you slide it down. You drag the shorts down your legs one by one and then you reach for the hem of your shirt pulling it over your head. This leaves you half naked and feeling incredibly vulnerable.

Jungkook eyes you up and down quite shamelessly. His tongue darts out to lick his lip and he muffles a groan,

“You look fine.” He says so nonchalantly it makes you want to pull his hair out.

“Just fine?”

“You look good y/n” he says, his eyes sliding to the left. You don’t feel quite satisfied with his answer so you step towards him, getting so close he is forced to step back until his back is against the wall.

“How good?” you say, your voice dipping lower than usual, “So good you would—"

Bbbrrrr bbbrrrr bbrrrrr bbrrrr

Your phone.

“Hello? ….Hey Tae. No need, I’ll just meet you at your car. Okay, bye.” You click the phone off and throw it on your bed. You gather your clothes and put them back on as Jungkook stands there awkwardly. Once you have your things you turn to face Jungkook.

“Well Tae is here…” you motion towards the door. “Look, if you’re going to be at the party can you try to…respect my fake relationship? We wanna make it as real as poss—”

“I get it.” Jungkook snaps before walking out your bedroom. Fantastic.

~~~

“And this is y/n.” Taehyung pushes you forward by the shoulders as you stumble in front of all these new faces.

“Hi everyone.” You squeak out.

Everyone gives you a warm welcome, many handshakes and hugs later you feel well acquainted. You notice a familiar face. He’s laughing with Jin over some beers and you smile in their direction. Namjoon, a friend you met freshmen year. He notices you look in his direction and he waves you over. So you walk towards him and Jin, Namjoon handing you a drink as you get closer.

“Long time no see y/n!” his dimples light up the entire backyard. He glances between you and Taehyung, who is chatting with some others.

“You and our Taehyungie, huh?” He grins at you, “honestly, I thought you would end up with Jungkook.” You can’t help but blush at that. A real deep blush. Namjoon chuckles but his eyes hold pity.

“no no not Jungkook.” You laugh awkwardly.

“Well, Jungkook has always spoken really highly of you so I am sure Taehyung is a lucky guy.” Jin chimes in.

For some reason you feel sick at that. Jungkook speaks highly of you? Yet here you are ignoring him for another guy. You are avoiding your own best friend because of a boy. Fuck, you are the worst.

“thanks guys…well, I’m gonna go see Tae.”

You walk over to Taehyung, and when he spots you he absolutely lights up. His boxy grin taking over his entire face.

“There’s my girl,” he pulls you in for a hug and places a kiss to your head. You want to melt, you want to feel the lava of love drown you but instead you feel anxious as you notice Jungkook from across the yard. He’s got a beer to his lips and his eyes on you.

“Thanks for doing this y/n.” Taehyung also catches the pair of eyes watching the two of you. He meets Jungkook’s hard gaze and automatically Taehyung is filled with anxiety as well. Jungkook just shakes his head towards his friend and takes a generous sip of his drink.

“Everything okay?” you ask, squeezing his hand in yours.

“Everything is fine.” He says with a tight lip smile. “Just glad you’re here.” He says honestly.

A few hours pass, and the whole gang is crowded in the pool. Mostly everyone is drunk, but you are pretty sober. Not wanting a repeat of last weekend. Yikes, amirite ladies? Taehyung has his hands all over you, which you don’t really mind. The thought of him touching you was once something that might make you faint but you’ve grown comfortable. Your eyes scan the pool when you notice Jungkook is nowhere to be found. Did he go home already? Maybe he was feeling so down because you’ve been ignoring him…god, you hate yourself. You just need to talk to him. You’re a shitty friend, for sure.

“I’m gonna be right back,” you whisper to Taehyung. He only nods his head and continues chatting with his friends.

Jin’s house is beyond nice, and also huge. You are trying to find the bathroom but feel like you are opening every door but the one you’re looking for. There’s only one door left at the end of the main hall and you bet your entire ass it’s the bathroom. You reach for the door knob when you hear something muffled on the other side. Oh, it’s taken.

“Thanks for this.” It’s a woman’s voice.

“No problem.” Its Jungkook. You feel your stomach drop. What makes you feel worse is how detached Jungkook sounds. He sounds far away and broken. The doorknob begins to rattle and you try to make a run for it in time but are too late. The door is swinging open and one of Jin’s friends is walking out and in the background you see Jungkook zipping up his pants. His eyes meet yours and you want to run the fuck away.

“y/n?” Jungkook’s eyes expand twice their size as he spots you.

“I was…I was just looking for the bathroom.”

Jungkook’s face hardens, “Well, you found it.” He makes his way to pass you but you grab on to his arm to stop him.

“Wait,” you breathe in and out, trying to give yourself time to think of what you want to say.

“What is it?” his voice is somehow softer than he probably intended.

“I want to talk to you…explain to you why I’ve been ignoring you.”

“Yeah, you’re still pissed at me, I fucking get it.” He spits out bitterly.

“It’s…it’s more than that.”

“More than that? Did I do something more? What did I do? y/n just tell me…” He rocks back and forth on his heels, his eyes glued to the ground.

“You’re going to be so mad at me, maybe even hate me—”

“You know I could never hate you.” He whispers, sounding so sincere it crushes you.

You glance around your surroundings, making sure no one is around and drag him back into the bathroom for some privacy. You shut the door behind you, trying so hard to ignore the smell of sex.

“Tae thought—” you begin but Jungkook is already rolling his eyes to the back of his head.

“Of course Tae thought.” His tone almost scares you. “Let me guess? Taehyung doesn’t want me around while you guys are fake dating. That’s not fucking weird to you?” He grits between his teeth. He balls up his fists at his side, you see his knuckles turn white and it makes you feel uneasy.

“He made some good points…”

“Oh really?” Jungkook laughs bitterly, “Like what?”

You looked into Jungkook’s doe eyes and feel a sense of guilt, like you somehow made the wrong choice.

“He thinks we’re too close. And he’s right. It would be weird if I’m super closer to another guy while dating him.” you reason, but your face falls when you see Jungkook’s scrunched up expression.

“You think we’re too close?” he whispers.

Well, yes. But also, no. Of course not, but also yes. How do you tell Jungkook all of that?

“People always think we’re dating or fucking or—”

“Oh? And all the sudden we care what people think?” his voice wavers from the rollercoaster of emotions he is feeling.

“Jungkook wait, I’m wording this all wrong. It’s just for a month okay?”

“You wanna date him that badly? That you would throw me away?” he grits out.

“Hey! That’s not fucking fair.”

“So what? Say your little fantasy comes true and he decides he wants to date you for real? Am I still out of the picture?”

“No no, of course not…” you shake your head and reach for his hands but he pulls away.

“So then what’s the difference now?”

Jungkook has a good point but you’re at a loss for words. Too choked up to speak.

“And you know what y/n? Fuck you for choosing him over me in the first place.” And with that Jungkook breezes past you, swings open the bathroom door and is out of your view.

Jungkook has never spoken to you like that before, you stand there with your mouth hung open and tears forming in your eyes.

He’s right. You fucked up. You did a fucked up thing. You chose a boy who may not even actually like you over the one guy who has always had your back.

“y/n?” you snap your head in the direction of the door to see Taehyung standing there. A look of disappointment decorating his face.

“I was told you and Jungkook were in the bathroom…” he spits out.

“I had to talk to him, that’s all.”

“Yeah, but how does this look for me?” Taehyung speaks sternly. You did NOT need this right now.

“Tae—”

“You couldn’t even last more than a week y/n.” he scoffs.

“Listen could we just talk about this later?” you ask with pleading eyes.

“I’ll call an uber.” He motions towards the hallway, “we can talk tomorrow.”

You slump your shoulders and nod your head, tomorrow sounds like it’s for the best.

3 days have passed and neither Jungkook nor Taehyung have talked to you.

You hear Jungkook come in and out of the apartment but you’re too shy to make a move outside of your bedroom. He’s either coming from classes, the gym, Jimins, or some girls house and you’re dying to know which.

You have been hibernating in your room, taking comfort in your bed when you get a notification from Instagram.

@V tagged you in a post.

You scramble to unlock your phone so you can view the post. Once you are on the app you click on you notifs and click on the post.

It’s a picture of you eating cotton candy from when he took you to the fair on your date. With the caption:

“Missing my girl tonight”

And a bunch of heart emojis. Your own heart sinks. He misses you? You close the app and instead open your messages.

y/n 9:08pm

You miss me for the show or is there some truth behind that?

Taehyung 9:20pm

Maybe it’s both?

Taehyung 9:22pm

I am sorry for how I left things…I was just kinda embarrassed that my supposed girl was with another guy,,,in a bathroom.

y/n 9:24pm

trust me I know how it looks and im sorry…

y/n 9:26pm

If it makes you feel any better Jungkook isn’t talking to me either.

Taehyung 9:26pm

Of course that doesn’t make me feel better, he is your best friend…

y/n 9:28pm

tae, I hope we can continue this…I still want to help you…

Taehyung 9:34pm

Ill pick you up at 6 for a date tmrw: )

y/n 9:34pm

I cant wait: ) : )

You click your phone off and toss it on the other side of the bed, you squeal in excitement as the realization hits that Taehyung still wants to do this with you.

You hear Jungkook on the other side of the wall, yelling into what you assume is his headset. He’s gaming. You miss him so god damn much. He has no idea what his silence is doing to you. You try to focus your attention on tomorrows date with Taehyung but you can’t help the feeling in the pit of your stomach. Guilt. You were an awful friend and now thinking about it you are continuing to be an awful friend. If he even counts you as friends anymore.

“fuck you”

Those words ring loud and clear in your ears. You didn’t even know Jungkook was capable of speaking to you like that. It fucking hurts.

Jungkook is in his room pacing back and forth. He saw it. The insta post. And he feels like he’s losing you. Neither of you have made a move to speak to the other. He’s just too hurt and you continue to see Taehyung? You obviously don’t feel too bad about the whole ordeal. And 3 days is just too long. A week was too long, but somehow these 3 days are worse.

Jungkook grabs his phone and opens up tinder. He messages one of the girls that’s been teasing him lately. He figures now is the time to make more of a move.

Jungkook 10:00pm

Hey ;) what are you doing tonight?

Leslie 10:10pm

Gonna be thinking about you probably;)

Jungkook 10:12pm

Instead of thinking about me, come see me.

And that was it, that’s all it took. She was quick to agree and he is already sending her the address.

It’s after 11pm when you hear the front door open, you quietly get out of bed, curiosity getting the best of you. Was Jungkook leaving? But then you hear a girls voice and you immediately frown. Oh. She sounds pretty. Is that even a thing? Well, she does. And it has you feeling weird. You thought you were over this.

You hear the patter of their footsteps walking towards Jungkook’s room, the sound of his door opening and closing just like that.

You walk back to your bed feeling ashamed for spying, but now you know you won’t be getting any sleep tonight. Fanfuckingtastic.

“aaahhh…” the random girl whines out causing you to shift uncomfortably in your bed.

“More?” you can hear Jungkook’s muffled voice, he sounds strained. Probably because he’s fucking some girl a few feet away from you.

You reach over to your nightstand for your headphones when you hear Jungkook grunting as the beds headboard bangs against your wall, he groans and moans and you feel yourself getting hotter.

You try not to imagine Jungkook in these scenarios but he sounds…no, you won’t have those thoughts…you don’t want to remember. Your hand is still midair when you retreat it back to your bed.

“Fuck yeah baby.” You hear him gripe. And you squeeze your thighs together. No, this cannot be happening.

“Jungkook! Jungkook!” Fuck, she sounds so fucked out.

“Feels so good, feels so good” he pants over and over and you feel the back of your eyes burn.

“gonna come” he groans out and your chest is heaving now, your breathing becoming a chore. You can’t cry, not over this. He hates you and he’s buried in some other girl. And you want to fucking crying about it. You hear him moaning on the other side of the wall and then—

“Fuuuuuuccckk” his orgasm is fucking apparent. He’s obviously coming and you’re lying in your bed all fucking pathetic with tears staining your cheeks.

Jungkook lays in bed totally fucked out of his mind. This girl is sleeping next to him, trying to her best to cuddle but he resists. He wishes he had time to himself to think properly. He just fucked another girl and thought of you the entire time. He is 100% fucked up. Wait, wait. He needs to explain himself…it’s not like he thought of you like, sexually. It’s just you’re all that’s on his mind. Even during fucking sex. And he hates himself for it.

He decides to sneak out of bed to have a shower. He creaks open his door for any sign of life and when there is none he tip toes to the bathroom. Jungkook stands in the shower letting the warm water cascade over his skin, he just stands there lifeless.

Images of you cross his mind and he sinks to his knees, pulling them into his chest and he quietly curses under his breath. He misses you so much and things have gotten so messed up he just doesn’t even know how to fix it.

He scrubs himself clean, ridding the scent of the random girl he brought over. He sniffles under the raining water hating himself.

Jungkook dries himself off with your towel, and puts on his shorts. His chest left bare.

He exits the bathroom when he notices a light coming from the kitchen and sees you sitting at the table with a glass of water.

“oh.” Jungkook slips up.

“oh?” you wonder.

“I thought you were fast asleep.” He says, rubbing the back of his neck with a sheepish grin.

“Just woke up.” You lie through your teeth with a strained smile. “Couldn’t sleep…”

“I know the feeling…” he admits, walking closer to you.

Jungkook makes his way to the table before pulling out a chair and sitting down next to you.

“Listen—”

“Jungkook—”

You both begin talking at the same time. Jungkook ushers you to go first.

“I…I’m still fake dating Tae.”

“I know.”

“But…” your eyes gloss over, getting choked up trying to continue. “But I am so sorry.” A few tears spill from your eyes.

“I know y/n.” he reaches his hand to squeeze your knee. You feel so much better with him touching you. “I’m sorry too…I was really harsh. And it pains me every day that I haven’t talked to you.”

“Trust me, I get it. I wanted to like, kill myself not talking to you.” Your eyes slam shut as more tears threaten to fall.

Jungkook’s face morphs into a deep frown, “You know I don’t like when you say that…”

“Right…sorry.”

“Honestly y/n…I don’t know when I will be okay with this, but I’ll respect your wishes for the month.”

“Jungkook…” Your hand flies down to his and you squeeze it but he’s quick to let it go.

“I’m mad at you right now.” He admits softly, his breathing is slow and steady. “So just give me some space.”

~~~

Like magical clockwork you hear light knocking on your front door. You scramble to find your phone and your purse to make it to the door in good time but you hear it being creaked open and the voices of two men. Shit, Jungkook got to the door first.

Ever since you started fake dating Taehyung it seems Jungkook has been keeping a distance from him. You aren’t sure why but they’ve been weird. So you want to avoid as much awkwardness as possible. You grab all your belongings and rush to the living room and find the two men sitting on the sofa quietly chatting.

“Can you keep your voice down dude?” Taehyung peers over his shoulder, looking in the direction of your room. “Would if she hears?”

“I wish she would fucking hear,” Jungkook grits through his teeth, his eyes rolling to the back of his head, “Why don’t you just tell her?” he leans back on the back of the sofa, “She might be understanding, hm? Do it before it’s too late or I swear to god Taehyung I will tell her myself.”

“You swore you wouldn’t say shit. Just like how I swore not to say any—”

“Okay.”

“I’ll tell her dude. Just give me some time to—"

Jungkook’s eyes shoot up when he hears the light creak of your bedroom door open, he waits expectantly for you to walk through.

“Hey guys,” you announce your presence and both boys look up at you and smile. Taehyung with his boxy grin and Jungkook with a tightlipped smile.

“Hey y/n, you look nice,” Taehyung stands to his feet and walks towards you, “I mean, you always do.” He stops just in front of you and hands you a bag.

“What’s this?” you take the bag and jingle it around a bit.

“just something for our date.” He grins. “You can open it later.” Taehyung glances over at Jungkook, “Anyway, let’s get going. See you later man.” He nods toward the boy and faces you again. “shall we?”

You smile up at Taehyung and take his hand in your yours and lead him towards the front door but before you leave you and Jungkook make eye contact and he frowns.

Taehyung being the gentlemen he is runs to the car before you and opens your car door.

“Feet inside?” he asks and you’re nodding yes when he shuts the door for you. He runs around the other side and enters the car himself. Taehyung settles on an old 50’s station with the volume just right. He’s humming along with a dopey grin on his face, feeling satisfied with his choice.

“Where are we going?” you ask.

“Let’s get some dinner first then we can do our date activity I have planned” he chuckles to himself, tapping his fingers on the steering wheel.

You drive around in comfortable silence when you decide to take your phone out and shoot Jungkook a text.

y/n 6:14pm

You okay?

Jungkook 6:16pm

Don’t worry about me while you’re out with another guy

“Everything okay?” Taehyung asks, pulling you out of your thoughts.

“hm? Oh, yeah. Just thinking.” You reply quite honestly.

“About Jungkook?”

“What?? Why would you assume that?” your voice rises in panic.

“Well, we were all just together and I know you and him are fighting…I thought it was a safe assumption.” He laughs awkwardly.

“Oh…right. Actually, me and Jungkook sorted things out kind of but we’re still barely talking.”

“oh? Really?” Taehyungs grip on the steering wheel tightens.

“He said he will steer clear for the month, ya know, in public.”

“He—he agreed?” Taehyung coughs a few times, his head pushed back in disbelief.

“Something like that.” You don’t really know what to say, this is an awkward thing to be talking about and you wish the subject would change.

“Anyway,” you begin, “How did things with Anna escalate?”

Taehyung freezes. The color draining from his face as his knuckles turn white from gripping the steering wheel so hard.

“Um.” Taehyung feels sweat beading on his forehead as he tries to come up with an answer.

“You know how it is,” his mouth feels dry as he tries to speak, “She just won’t leave me alone and I want to show her that I am taken so she will get the hint.” Then a sly smile spreads across his face “and I think it’s working.”

“You think so?” you raise a brow in question.

“Well, you are such a convincing girlfriend after all.” His right arm extends towards your knee and he squeezes it. “Thanks again y/n…” he almost sounds…guilty. But you push that thought away and smile at him. Your sweet smile making him feel even guiltier.

~~~

“Dinner was sooo good.” You raise your arms above your head, stretching your body, a satisfied moan leaving you as you lower your arms again.

“I knew you’d like it! Best pizza in town!” Taehyung sets his credit card in the bill holder on the table. “Ready for what I have planned next?”

“hmmm, yes.”

The two of you wait for the server to return so you can finish paying so you can leave. Once all finished up at the restaurant the two of you head back to the parking lot and get inside his car to go to your next destination.

“Your apartment?” you ask as you notice his building coming into view.

“Yes. But you’ll see.” He turns his head quickly to flash you his pearly whites.

The two of you walk to his front door as he unlocks the door. Taehyung has a two bedroom apartment but lives alone. You’ve only ever seen his kitchen and living room and you’re wondering if you’re lucky enough you’ll see his bedroom. Hehe but that’s wishful thinking.

“You have that bag?” Taehyung asks,

“yup,” you say lifting it up and showing him the precious goods.

“Great go put it on!”

You tilt your head in confusion but you see how excited he is so you walk to his bathroom and shut the door behind you. Would if it was lingerie? You giggle to yourself at the ridiculous idea.

You open the bag to find some type of clothing. First, you pull out a large white t shirt and next was an…apron? The apron was a light pink color with a pocket in the front with your initials embroidered on it. You gasp once you realize it, your heart beating out of your chest as you melt into a puddle on the floor. He got your initials on an apron? You hurry to change into the white t shirt and put the apron on.

“Cute.” You murmur to yourself in the mirror before you’re out the door and back into the living room.

“How do you like it?” Taehyung asks from behind you, surprising you with a glass of water. You take the water gratefully and gulp down a few sips before answering.

“love it, but what’s it for?”

Taehyung beams, grabbing your arm and leading you into one of the bedrooms. He stands in front of the door and bounces on his heels.

“Ready?”

“Yes?”

“Never showed anyone this room but I feel like you’re special” Taehyung giggles, “Plus I thought it was a cute date idea.”

“hmm, okay. I’m ready.” You are such a fool for this boy, his cuteness doing a million things to you.

Taehyung begins to slowly open the door revealing a room with tarp covering the ground and easels taking up space. There are buckets of paint, a variety of colors spread all across. And many, many art pieces.

“You…” you begin to say in awe, “You’re an artist, Tae?”

“Aspiring.” He chuckles a bit bitterly. “How would you like to paint together?”

“You feel comfortable enough with me?” you ask, surprised.

“Something about you….” He starts but leaves it hanging. “Let’s paint!”

You dip your paint brush in purple paint and stroke it across the canvas, the color joining a mess of other colors. That’s art, right? Fuck, you are not good at this. You sneak a glance over at Taehyung to see him painting a scenic art piece. There’s mountains and flowers but somehow in an abstract kind of way, you tilt your head to the side trying to eye it more carefully.

“Hey, no peeking!” his bottom lip jutting out in the cutest way. You just want to kiss it.

You stand from your stool and walk over to his, your eyes never leaving his art work.

“I’m trying to figure out what I am looking at. Don’t get me wrong, its super cool. But like there’s this beautiful tree with flowers but also shapes??”

“Its abstract, y/n.” his tone is light and makes you flutter. “I like it this way.” He says softly.

“me too.” You look at him, his eyes meeting yours. His gaze shifts to your lips.

“heh really?” Taehyung’s cheeks turn a wonderful shade of pink, like the flowers on his canvas.

“You really are amazing, aren’t you?”

“Me? Let’s see what you got!” He stands from his stool and begins walking over to your art work.

“No!” you stand in his way, your arms flailing above your head. “It’s not good!” You laugh and push his chest back with your hands, Taehyung wobbles in place as he laughs at your dramatics.

“It can’t be that bad.”

You finally let him walk past you, he stands in front of your canvas with his finger on his chin,

“Okay, it can be that bad.”

Taehyung bubbles with laughter and you hit his shoulder but end up laughing with him.

“I told you.” You pout. Taehyung stares at you, his eyes once again shifting towards your lips and you aren’t going to play dumb, of course you’ve noticed.

“What?” you jut your lip out even more, walking just a bit closer to him.

“Nothing, you’re just cute.” Taehyung admits. His long fingers brush against your cheek as he pushes a piece of hair behind your ear.

“Like, really cute.”

Well, holy shit. Your heart and also your vagina cannot take this.

“How cute?” you breathe out.

“So cute I could kiss you.” Taehyung walks closer, his foot bumping into yours. “But…” He looks down at the ground, guilt beginning to surface, “y/n I have to tell—”

You tilt your head up and meet his lips for a peck on the lips taking him by surprise. Taehyung knits his brows together and is about to say something when he sighs out instead. One of his hands travel to cup the back of your head to bring you closer to him and he kisses you again. He deepens the kiss. Its slow and there’s no tongue, just lips moving tenderly against one another. You feel so light and airy like you could just float away until he abruptly pulls back.

“What’s wrong?” you panic, worry filling your eyes.

“We—we shouldn’t do that.” He finally says after a moment. Why? It was just some kissing between two people who possibly like each other? It’s not like you were delusional right? It’s not like you were making this up in your head. The flowers, the apron, the dinners, the car door, the ‘missing my girl’, the way he treats you can’t just be because of some fake dating bullshit. You know he is known for his kindness but to this extent?

“Why?” you finally say.

“Because,” Taehyung drags a hand across his face, “No one’s around. Let’s just take our pictures—”

BBrrrrrr bbbrrrr brrrrrr bbbrrrr

Taehyung’s phone is sitting on the table next to where the two of you are, it’s going off and you naturally glance over.

Incoming call: Anna

Taehyung races to turn it off, his face flushing and his hands have become sweaty.

“She…she just doesn’t give up.” He chuckles awkwardly, his phone in his grasp as you hear the buzzing of incoming messages.

“Is that her too?” you ask, feeling sorry for him.

“Uh, yeah…probably.” He says, his eyes looking all over the room but never on you.

“Well, let’s see what she’s saying.” You say nonchalantly, reaching for his phone but he yanks his hand back and barks a loud ‘No’. Startled, you step away from him.

“Sorry, I just…” he rubs his neck.

“No no, it’s okay, I shouldn’t have reached for your phone like that…” Something is off, You can feel it. But you want to push that feeling away.

“Let’s just take the pictures, I need to get home soon.”

“Yeah, okay.” Taehyung forces a smile.

~~~

Something is off with Taehyung. The way he wanted to kiss you but then pulled back. The way he got super weird after Anna called. Has she traumatized him that much? Is she like a real, legit stalker who is totally and completely obsessed with him? You feel bad for the guy, he seems like he probably has trust issues or something. Maybe he thinks you might turn out to be like her and he’s scared of that so that’s why he is pushing you away.

That’s gotta be it. You roll around in your bed about to finally get some sleep when you hear music blaring through the wall. Jungkook. You roll your eyes at his choice of timing. The clock reads after midnight, why the hell is he blasting music at this time?

You rise from your bed and storm into his room. Jungkook looks surprised to see you as he is in the middle of doing pushups—shirtless.

His muscles ripple with every movement and it has you practically drooling.

“Uh, can I help you?” Jungkook doesn’t look very annoyed, mostly amused.

“It’s late, Jungkook. Can you turn this shit down?”

“Can’t. Didn’t get a work out in today…so here I am.” He rises to his feet, shrugging.

The music is some horrible rock back that you can’t stand and Jungkook knows this. He fucking knows this. Wow, he really is mad at you still.

“Listen dude,” you put your hands on your hips, “I’ve had a weird day and I just want to relax.”

“Oh baby, I can think of a way for you to relax.” He winks. You want to puke, why is Jungkook so gross.

“Ew.”

“So…how was it?” Jungkook’s eyes fall to the ground.

“What?”

“How—how was your date with Taehyung?” he doesn’t raise his eyes, they stay glued to the floor.

“It was…” you get flashbacks to the awkward date, “fine.” You finish, not wanting to give Jungkook any more reason to dislike you and Taehyung together. “Yeah, it was fine” you force a smile.

“You know I know better than anyone when you’re lying.” He says, finally looking at you again.

Fuck. He’s right, if anyone knows you and your lying habits its Jungkook. He can read you like his favorite book. And it’s like, a picture book. Super fucking easy.

“It was fine Jungkook.” You lie again.

“What happened?” his tone eases into something softer, something more comforting and it almost makes you break and tell him the truth. Almost. But not quite.

“Nothing happened. Keep the music down, I’m going to bed.”

Jungkook watches as you spin on your heels to exit his bedroom, his eyes caving and watching your ass the entire time. He has a love-hate relationship with your house shorts, they’re sexy as hell and that’s the problem.

Jungkook turns the volume down on his speakers and sits on the edge of his bed. His head falls into his hands as he thinks about your date with Taehyung. Something must have happened. He knows it. He feels it. But he can’t force you to tell him.

He lays back on his bed and his face hardens as he thinks more about your fake relationship. He wants to beat Taehyungs ass. He wish he could tell you but it’s not his place and he just wishes Taehyung will do the right thing.

While staying loyal to Taehyung is he betraying you?

~~~~

Best friend: “A person you value over other friends in your life, someone you have fun with, someone you trust and someone in whom you confide.” That’s how the dictionary would describe the word but in Jungkook’s dictionary it would just be your cute face. Everything about you is cute to him, the way you walk, talk, dress, sneeze, just everything.

Even when you look gross as hell in the mornings dealing with a nasty hangover he still viewed you as…cute.

When Jungkook first noticed you was in his Literature class that took place on Tuesdays and Thursdays. He knew you always sat in the back and took your notes without really paying him any attention. And not to sound like a cocky bastard but…why not? He obviously thought you were pretty and there was something about you…

The second time he noticed you was at some frat party where he caught you staring at him and he thought he finally might have a chance at talking to you. Or get in your pants at least. He could one and done this situation and move on with his life but much to his surprise you weren’t interested in getting dicked down by him. No, you were interested in just…hanging out. Which he wasn’t use to. Most girls just wanted to say the got with the Jeon Jungkook and don’t pay him any mind for something serious. Because apparently he isn’t the type of guy you could be “serious” with. It’s not like he doesn’t hear the rumors. He hated this honestly…but he guesses it’s his own fault.

He even playfully offered to take you upstairs that night but you refused him. Much too shy. So he got a better idea: the 24 hour diner down the road.

You ended up talking until 9 am the next morning, laughing and snorting, telling tons of stories that cracked the two of you up. He even shared deeply personal information with you that shocked the both of you. But it just felt right—talking to you. He felt like he could open his heart to you, like he was making a real friend.

Jungkook doesn’t have much of a dating history…he mostly just sleeps around and is okay with that—because he has to be. Like what was said earlier, Jungkook isn’t a guy you get “serious” with and all the girls knew that. It just started with one girl spreading the fact he isn’t the type to ‘do’ relationships. He thought this would cause girls to try harder and try to change him or whatever. But none cared enough. He guesses…he just isn’t worth it. Does Jungkook yearn for something more? You wouldn’t know because he has never voiced it. Even though he isn’t lucky in love, he did get super lucky in a friend. That’s you. He cherishes your friendship more than anything in the world and wouldn’t do anything to risk ruining it.

3 years ago

“What about you?” you smile at him with all your teeth, “What are your parents like?”

You didn’t know at the time but this question made Jungkook feel the very dread he avoids feeling.

He looked into your wide eyes and couldn’t help the sigh that escapes his lips.

“Dad cheated the whole time and moms not around anymore.” Jungkook picks at his cuticles.

You felt a pang of guilt for bringing it up…but you were too curious to stop.

“Where did she go?” you can’t seem to stop yourself from asking.

Jungkook pauses his bad habit, his fingers coming to a halt.

“Can we change the subject?” he finally says, a small smile spreading across his lips, “It’s like, uh…a touchy subject. Ya know?” he almost looks as if he feels bad that he can’t confide in you.

“I promise I will tell you about it someday.” He swears with his pinky joining your pinky. You felt content with his answer but somehow you knew he probably never would.

Jungkook lays in his bed with his head dangling off the edge. Its 10 at night and you’re still not back. You had another date with Taehyung today—he knows because he follows the both of you on Instagram and you posted a photo of Taehyung in front of a mural that’s located just downtown. He grabs his phone to check your location and unfortunately you are still in the same spot—Taehyungs apartment. He hates this. Why does he hate this? Because Taehyung doesn’t deserve you and what he’s doing is not right. But he can’t tell you that because none of this is his business. Instead all he does is piss you off and he hates himself for it.

He truly thinks the world of you, he truly wants nothing but the best for you and he truly loves you. You’re his best friend.

Jungkook starts to doze off when he hears the front door being unlocked. It’s you.

Quickly, Jungkook jumps to his feet and scurries to his bedroom door and places his ear over the wood. He hears you talking…then another voice. You’re not alone. Its muffled but he makes out what you’re saying.

“It was amazing T,” oh, you’re with Trina. “He got me flowers, took pictures of me and got all my best angles.” He hears you giggling then another voice joins you in your laughter.

“I told you! This was a great idea!” Trina says, Jungkook rolls his eyes.

“He was such a gentlemen the whole time and it…I know it’s not real but I don’t know man…it feels real sometimes.”

“Girl, he would be stupid not to have a thing for you.” For once, Trina and Jungkook agree on something.

“I would actually kill myself if he did!” you giggle.

Jungkook goes rigid at your words, his jaw clenching so hard it ticks. He hates when you say shit like that, it creates a suffocating bubble around him that’s too hard to pop.

.

Jungkook decides he’s eavesdropped enough and settles back on his bed. He lays back, his arms folded behind him. He feels beyond frustrated and doesn’t know what could cure this. Well, maybe sex? Maybe he should call up some girl…maybe that could make him feel better. But somehow that didn’t appeal to him so much in this moment when his brain is occupied of you. So he settles for himself. It’s been a while since Jungkook gave himself a handy but he’s not opposed of going for it.

The lights are off and Jungkook is deciding if he wants to watch porn or settle for his imagination. A girl he use to hook up with enters his mind and he decides to roll with it, he dips his hands underneath his boxers to feel up his hardening length. He reaches for his nightstand to squirt some lube in his hand, his cock is only half hard by the time he’s gently stroking himself. The skin on his cock is smooth with few veins decorating the length, he’s already leaking precum while his imagination starts up.

He thinks of this girl and her lips, how she looks with them wrapped around his greedy cock and he becomes even harder. Fuck, he can’t remember her name—a piece of shit move but he doesn’t care at this point. He’s stroking himself faster, gathering the precum at his tip and smearing it around. A light moan escapes his lips as he tugs on the head of his cock harder. His other hand drags his boxers down his legs as his continues to stroke himself and then reaches to fondle his balls. He groans at the sensation.

He then thinks of the girls ass in the air, her wiggling it around and begging him to fuck her. Her ass is round and plump, it jiggles slightly as she squirms below him. His hand moves quickly as his thoughts get dirtier. He doesn’t see her face just her ass and her voice sounds a lot like…yours. Fuck, he can’t be thinking of you right now. He’s pissed at you, his thoughts growing angry yet somehow his hand doesn’t stop. He’s so close it fucking hurts.

“Fuck…y/n..” he whimpers into his shoulder. He now sees your face, underneath him, your hair all splayed out. Your lips are swollen and you whine for him, begging for him to fuck into you faster. Jungkook squeezes his eyes shut at that image, his hand stroking him impossibly fast as he is beginning to lose all composure. He shouldn’t be thinking of you right now, or ever—not like this. But he hears you beg for him, he imagines flipping you over, demanding you to raise your ass in the air. You beg to be punished, you beg for him to spank you, and he does. He pulls his hand back and slaps your needy ass and you whimper. He does it again and again.

He sees himself insert his cock into your pussy and he’s thrusting in and out like his life depends on it. Jungkook’s hand squeezes desperately around his throbbing member, he cries out quietly as he fucks you in his mind.

He imagines you reaching your own high, your moans and screams ringing in his ears and that’s what sets him over the edge. His cum spurts out of his swollen cock, spraying all over his hand as he begins to come to a stop on himself.

“fuck fuck fuck fuck” Jungkook is out of breath, his fantasy too much for him to handle. “What the fuck did I just….”

He sits in complete silence as his breathing comes down. Did he just? He is not supposed to do that.

#bts #bts smut #bts fluff #bts angst #jeon Jungkook #Jungkook x reader #jungkook smut #jungkook angst #jungkook fluff #kim taehyung #taehyung smut #taehyung fluff #taehyung angst

[latteloves]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love 💖

was tagged by the lovely @lissiamoonstone! thank you!!

here is my list:

1. the one with the arranged marriage

Harry Potter has little to no hope of ending Lord Voldemort. And according to the prophecy, she's the only one who can. When an opportunity arises in which she can settle the matter that doesn't involve killing him or being killed—Harry seizes it. A marriage bond is the only loophole they can think of that could get both of them out of the prophecy. It's binding magic is ancient and powerful. Powerful enough to override that little line that said 'either must die at the hand of the other'. Now, neither can harm the other. Besides, it's not like she imagined there would ever be a happily ever after for her where she marries someone she loves and has a family. The costs of this war are too great and her guilty conscience won't let her sit around any longer.

This fic basically wrote itself entirely, it one of the easiest for me to get out. It was also written at a time when I was super stressed out from long days of school and projects. I would write it when I should have been doing other things (the best part of fanfiction) and it was all worth it to hear people tell me they enjoyed my fic.

2. are there still beautiful things?

After three days of not getting any word out of Harry about what she was up to, Umbridge had her crony toss her into a high-security cell in Azkaban. “Some time with the Dementors ought to loosen her tongue,” she said to the Snatcher who was with her. Some time. Some time turned into years. — “I’ve been searching for you everyday for three years,” Voldemort said, his nose flaring. “And this whole time you were here. In Azkaban. Tell me who brought you here so I can skin them alive.”

I started this fic one night at 5am when I couldn't sleep and I posted the first chapter after a quick edit/skim and then went to sleep again. The reaction I got from just the first chapter blew my mind and I am forever grateful for everyone who encouraged me to keep it up, because it may not be the best work out there, but it was what gave me the confidence and drive to keep posting any all random ideas I get sdfjdslkf

3. my tears ricochet

Rose’s dying face flashed in his mind, but he pushed her to the side. She had not cursed him. She only meant to scare him. He laughed. He didn’t scare easily at twenty-seven, he scared even less now. All his enemies were dropping like flies or worse. Where are you? You said you would be there at every turn of event, watching me, cursing me. And then a prophecy was made. Thirteen years after he returned to England, after he made himself invincible, Harriet Potter was born. Harriet Rose Potter. Voldemort stopped laughing. Or, the one where Tom Riddle repents for his sins.

Not a lot of people were so into this idea and the previous fic to this sequel, but it remains of my favourite things that I've written because it involves reincarnation and secret relationships and I was really happy with the central plot. It's also a more realistic take on Tom's character, like he is such an asshole, and I loved everyone moment of it.

4. behind every great man

They waited with bated breath for what would happen next. The Dark Lord stood and walked down the steps of the platform, standing next to Bellatrix as he glared at her. Then his gaze flicked to all the others, who immediately looked down. “Someone very important is arriving on Friday,” he answered. “Someone I wouldn’t want to… disappoint.” Eyes widened in fear. It was one thing to deal with the Dark Lord. But dealing with someone even the Dark Lord wouldn’t dream of disappointing… someone who required something from them that nearly got Dolohov exsanguinated? Merlin help them all.

This idea of fearful and ruthless Voldemort having someone who's opinion and approval he cared about is too good not to write (seriously ppl, please write more of this, i will eat it all up). Voldemort simps for Harry just a bit more than Harry does for Voldemort so we all know who's the real boss even though he won't admit it haha

5. the one where she is head over heels for him

Hermione snorted. “She was busy daydreaming about Riddle again. He looked at her for like two seconds.” “No,” Harry said quickly. “He also rolled his eyes at me!” “You're the only person who takes that as a good thing,” Ron said. “It’s not a good thing that he’s rolling his eyes at you, stop seeing it that way!” “It is coming from him,” Harry insisted confidently. “I know it. It’s his love language.” Harry Potter was head over heels in love with Tom Riddle. This was as obvious to everyone as the sky being blue. Getting in detention, luring him into conversations, and unintentionally getting paired with him for projects are the only ways she knows how to get his attention. If only he watched her during Quidditch matches, maybe she'd have a better chance, but he didn't care for Quidditch. How was she supposed to make him realize they're meant to be together?

I wrote this at the same time I was writing a lot of angst and I thought me (and my readers) needed a dose of happiness and fluff so I wrote this. It was really fun and I loved this slightly oblivious, happy-go-lucky and annoyingly stubborn Harry!

I know a lot of people have been tagged already, so sorry if I re-tagged you: @duplicitywrites @limonium-anemos @dividawrites @itsevanffs @luxvespertine

#harry potter #voldemort #my fics #fic recs #tomarry #harrymort

[willwriteforhugs]

you saved me- park seonghwa

seonghwa x reader - one shot !

word count: 2k

genre: fluff, meet-cute

synopsis: a busy and cold winter day leads you to a (very close) brush with death. but a stranger seems to be in just the right place at just the right time...

warnings: mentions of loneliness, near car accident (nothing too serious)

a/n: 

me as i open tumblr with the intent of actually posting for once: god i need to go post something so i feel less bad about being alive

so, anyways. first seonghwa fic- which is really just a long drabble. i always knew i wanted a seonghwa meet-cute, and this idea just seemed to suit him... please remember that this is for entertainment purposes only, though, so be respectful! (also, ^^^THIS genre of seonghwa pic, with the grainy filter and the tan...bruh...)

 anyways, i hope you enjoy, and as always- thank you for reading :)

- - -

your breath comes out in short, angry puffs, which you can see reflected in the cold afternoon air. the temperature in seoul is absolutely freezing, and you are not dressed for it. when you had left for work this morning, (in your standard sweater + jeans combo) you clearly were not anticipating that the sky would dump snow all day long. you long desperately for your warm winter coat.

so now, here you are: jogging, but only as quickly as you feel is safe in this weather. your condo is only a few blocks down- hence why you had walked in the first place, and why you hadn’t brought cash to pay for a bus. but god, the cold is just piercing.

the streets are practically empty, because of the terrible weather. so, at the very least, you are spared the embarrassment of having to waddle awkwardly on the ice in front of others.

but, to add to the stress- your day had seriously not gone as planned.

 when you first took it, you thought that the simple receptionist job would be easy- and doubly so with the convenient location. but these past few weeks were proving you wrong, today especially. while being distracted by coworkers, you accidentally put an important client on a somewhat permanent hold, and ruined a potential sale. as if that wasn’t enough, the next call you routed to a completely different office by mistake, earning you a strict talking to by the supervisor. 

so, to put it plainly: you were tired, annoyed, and cold. so. freaking. cold.

heaving a sigh, you continue your jog/waddle towards your street corner, which is two intersections away. faintly, you can hear a city bus approaching, the one that always stops near your work building. from where you are standing, the bus will be driving perpendicular to you, and you cock your head in thought. you don’t need the shuttle itself, since you live so close, but you wonder how close the bus is now...

feeling a sudden burst of energy, you speed up a bit, challenging yourself to beat the bus to the empty corner, even though you know it won’t stop there. this is something you do often- set up little games for yourself. it’s mostly an attempt to stay busy, but- though you’d never admit it, it helps with the loneliness too. when you race against the clock (say, to make a speedrun to the copy room at work) it almost feels like you are competing against an old friend.

you obviously know that you can’t beat the bus, but the thought itself is entertaining, so you throw caution to the wind. your feet slap the pavement as you run, and you hear yourself laugh a little. the cold air rushing by your cheeks helps distract you from your own thoughts.

you sprint through an empty intersection, and as you approach the final corner- having obviously lost the race to the bus- you begin to slow down a bit. but as you near the end of the sidewalk, (which is parallel to the moving bus, whose hulking body is getting ready to pass you) you feel your previous momentum get the better of you. 

you stumble off of the curb- and right into a vicious patch of ice on the waiting asphalt. 

it happens in slow motion: your feet slide harshly backwards, and you scramble for any traction- but to no avail. you hear yourself cry out as you fall forward, right into the path of the oncoming shuttle.

you slam your eyes shut.

but instead of hitting the ground, or the bus, a sudden weight catches you around your middle and lurches backwards. you scream again, certain you’ve already died.

you hear the sound of the bus honking as it speeds by- the only thing traveling faster than it is your frantic pulse.

you hit the ground hard, with all of your weight on your left shoulder and hip. even so, you start with the relief of knowing the bus didn’t even graze you. 

only after a moment do you realize why it hadn’t.

someone had caught you.

grabbed you from behind, and used their whole body weight to get the two of you to safety. 

you lurch forward, startled. as you turn around, you see him lying on the ground, in the same position you were in just seconds before- and you meet the eyes of the person who’d just saved you. 

it’s a man- a young one. and good god, he’s beautiful, too. the boy on the ground before you is seriously the epitome of korean beauty- large, dark eyes, an open face, and full lips. as soon as he opens his mouth, you wonder at how his teeth could possibly be so perfect.

it takes you a moment of staring before you realize he’s speaking to you. 

“um.” your voice breaks. “what?”

the boy scrambles onto his knees, shuffling towards you. “i asked if you’re alright- are you hurt?” his voice is concerned, and his hands flutter about your face- too wary to touch you, but clearly wanting to.

his eyes are more genuine than you can even take in, and you hesitate at the whole scene- what the hell is happening? did you hit your head?

you stutter, trying to make sense of the situation. the boy leans back on his heels as you finally catch your breath. 

your words are breathy, but deliberate. “you- you saved me.”

the boy tilts his head slightly, the corner of his mouth tugging upwards. “yes, i suppose i did.” a beat passes before he continues. his eyes, though now bordering on playful, still look worried. “you probably shouldn’t be running in this sort of weather.”

you heave a sigh that comes out in a laugh. “yeah, i realize that now.”

your counterpart picks himself up off the ground, brushing off his front. he then extends a hand towards you. you stare at it for a moment, confused. for a moment, he looks down at you intently, waiting. your puzzlement passes, and you blush as you cautiously place your palm in his, allowing him to help you up. 

“i’m seonghwa, by the way. park seonghwa.” the man- no, seonghwa looks down at you, letting his sentence hang.

you clear your throat, feeling a harsh wave of embarrassment at the situation. “um- i’m y/n.”

seonghwa nods at you, taking a step back. his brow is furrowed. “well, y/n-ssi- you didn’t actually tell me if you were hurt or not. do you feel dizzy? nauseous?”

you throw your hands up in protest, not wanting to cause any more distress than you already had. “no, uh- i’m fine, really. maybe a little bruised, but i’m okay. i think it would be a bigger problem if you were hurt...”

you are not exaggerating- you can only imagine the guilt you would feel if he’d been injured. 

seonghwa represses a smile. “i’m alright too. you did startle me, though. thought i was about to witness something pretty terrible...”

at this, you give a surprised chuckle. “yeah, i’m so sorry...you really came out of nowhere, huh? i seriously didn’t even know you were there until i was on the ground!”

this time, it’s his turn to laugh. “yeah, those bus stops provide great cover.”

the two of you settle into a stiff silence, and you can practically hear your heart pounding- both with leftover adrenaline, as well as the sudden nerves that seonghwa was giving you.

“here,” he says, breaking the quiet. “take this.” he shrugs off his long winter coat, and before you can argue, he’s reached over and settled it on your shoulders. the relief is near instantaneous, but you find yourself a bit too tongue-tied to thank him.

you sigh again, determined to get the words out. “oh, god, i really am so sorry about that, um-” you stutter. “i really should thank you, for the coat. but also-” you take a deep breath. “thank you, park seonghwa, for saving my life.”

at this, the man actually blushes. he reaches a hand to rub the back of his neck. “no, really, it was just a gut reaction...”

you shake your head, insistent. “it doesn’t matter. i could have died, but you prevented that. now-” you can feel yourself gaining confidence. “what can i do to repay you?”

seonghwa’s face, which had previously harbored a look of child-like innocence, suddenly turns mischievous. 

you tilt your head, indicating an answer.

his smug smile is full now, chin tilted upwards. “i actually do have a request.”

“okay, shoot.”

“you’ll do anything i ask?”

you frown, narrowing your eyes in an almost flirtatious way. “i suppose i have a few limits...”

to your surprise, seonghwa interrupts you, eyes twinkling. “you’ll repay me- by allowing me to take you out on a date, y/n.”

your mind goes fully blank for a moment. 

...huh?

you blink in shock, not being able to suppress your initial reaction. “wait, come again?”

“will you go on a date with me?”

you stare at him- this terrifyingly beautiful man was asking you on a date? after you’d fully humiliated yourself in front of him? what on earth?

suddenly, before you can even finish the thought, you find yourself nodding. “i suppose i can arrange that.”

seonghwa’s smile is completely smug at this point. “does tonight work?”

you bite your lip, heart pounding despite the chilly weather. your voice comes out in a whisper: “yes, i suppose tonight works.”

seonghwa tries to bury his smile and looks at the ground. “that’s great.” he pauses, allowing his gaze to flit back to you. “do you- i hope this doesn’t sound weird, but do you want me to walk you home?”

you smile, but shake your head. “it’s alright, i live close. here- i’ll give you my number, though.”

you dig through your work satchel for a piece of paper and scribble your phone number on it. when you extend it, he accepts the slip, still trying to suppress his grin.

a beat passes, and the two of you look at each other intently.

and with that, seonghwa reaches down and gently takes your hand, glancing at your face to make sure the action is alright with you. when you don’t pull away, he lifts it up and presses a soft kiss to the top of your hand, holding your gaze the entire time. his lips are cold, an unlikely and romantic nod to the temperature.

you feel your neck and cheeks go red, but you smile in an attempt to seem casual. “thanks again, seonghwa. for helping me.”

“of course.” the man’s eyes are twinkling again. “as grim as it sounds, i’m sort of glad it happened. if it hadn’t, i probably wouldn’t be talking with you right now.”

you smirk in what you hope is a flirtatious manner. 

“well,” he continues. “don’t let me keep you. after all, you’ve got a date to get ready for.”

seonghwa begins to walk away, then turns back. “although,” he calls over his shoulder. “i’m pretty sure the guy you’re meeting with won’t care what you’re wearing. you could probably show up in your pajamas and he’d still think you were gorgeous. just for the record.”

before you could manage an answer, he turns on his heel and strides away- but even from here, you can tell he still has a goofy grin plastered on his face.

heart pounding, you turn and make your way towards your apartment building. 

despite yourself, you also can’t seem to keep the grin off of your face.

#ateez #ateez fluff #ateez scenarios #ateez x reader #ateez imagines #park seonghwa #seonghwa #seonghwa x reader #seonghwa imagines #kpop #kpop fics #kpop writing #kpop scenarios #stray kids #stray kids imagines #ateez fics #kim hongjoong #jeong yunho #kang yeosang #choi san #song mingi #jung wooyoung #choi jongho #ateez smut

[simpsiren]

the uptight softie;

lee jeno x reader

Jeno Lee, president of the student council here in college. He’s everything you’d expect a president to be. Uptight, firm, yet still kind and sweet with his gentle side that you wouldn’t expect to stand out till you actually bother to talk to him. Though he unwillingly got voted, he still has a reputation to keep up, therefore the reason for his stern nature, not wanting to slip at any point of his college life to keep his position and do anything that’ll benefit him in University.

genre. angst, fluff, strangers to friends to lovers

word count. 19.2k~ (someone stop me omg sshsjsj)

description. Money. It has always been tempting isn’t it? It’s what makes the world go round. In this life where circumstances could easily be tipped in favour of the rich and powerful, it’s no surprise when one day Jeno is met with a woman that struck up a deal for him to tame her daughter to earn money in return. He thought it was a simple job, till he came face to face with the girl he had to keep under control.

!as they should masterlist!

It all started on a Tuesday. First week of the new school year. Jeno, being appointed as the new president of the student council, his first job was to plan a welcoming party for the new students fresh out of high school coming into their college.

“Can we please have alcohol?” Everyone’s heads turned to Ten in unison as his suggestion rang through the ears of the council members. With a sigh, Jeno leaned forward and covered his eyes with his hand for a moment before removing it and replying a, “Do you want me to be stripped of my position?” He questioned, not expecting a reply in return as he darted his eyes down on Ten.

“We can simply sneak it in though.” Jeno gaped his mouth open, lightly scoffing in disbelief as he heard his vice president even considering it as well. “You can’t be serious, Haechan.” Jeno leaned back into his chair, arms folded as the room fell silent. Everyone watched quietly while Jeno was deep in thought. He suddenly sprung back, sitting upright and placing his arms on the table, fingers clasped together in the most formal way possible.

“Only for the seniors.” Jeno scanned his eyes across the room, reading everyone’s expression that he couldn’t quite make out. Ten lets out a groan, slamming both hands palm down on the table. “Um hello? This party is for the freshmen for God’s sake. Why even allow alcohol when you’re only giving it to the seniors? No seniors will be there but us.” Ten rolled his eyes and huffed in exasperation. “We can get drunk anytime.”

Jeno turned his head to his next targets, aka the rest of the council. “What’s your say on this matter?” The four members, Mark, Winwin, Sungchan and Yangyang exchanged looks with each other. Jeno squinted his eyes while watching them send telepathic messages among them. None chose to reply Jeno. And so Mark was the only one to speak for the rest, saying, “I don’t think it’s a good idea.”

Ten stood up, pushing his chair so far back that it made contact with the wall, hands on his hips as he tried to supress his anger, Haechan doing the same while sitting down and dropping his head on the table. Jeno confidently rose from his chair, the loud sound of him closing shut the clipboard he had for the meeting. “That’s settles it. Meeting’s over.” Jeno announced with a very small, almost invisible smirk.

Ten and Haechan groaned and sulked in disappointment together while the rest began to pack up. Jeno made his way to the door with a cunning smile on his face. Just as he was about to grab the door handle, the door was already flung open for him. “Maybe I speak to Mr. Lee?” Jeno looked at the person standing in front of him. It was a woman. A young and healthy woman in her forties. It seemed like she had everything designer. Clothes, handbag, accessories.

“Which one are you referring to?” Haechan shouted from the back, making Jeno glance over his shoulder and wanting to roll his eyes but refrained himself from doing so in front of the woman. “Mr. Lee Jeno, of course.” Haechan lets out a loud and shameless ‘tsk’. Jeno cleared his throat, moving his body aside to give way for the woman. “Come in. Guys please exit quickly, thank you.” The woman walked in and took a seat. Jeno waited for the rest to float out of the meeting room and sat back down in his original spot.

“So who are you and why have you come to visit me?” Jeno asked politely, placing his clipboard back on the table and looking at the woman who sat two seats away from him. “I have an urgent matter to discuss.” She began, and Jeno was all ears. “I assume you’re aware that there’s going to be a new transferee.” Jeno glanced sideways and nodded, remembering that he’s been informed on the matter before the start of the school year.

“And what about it?” The woman sighed, leaning in as she stared at Jeno. Not knowing how to react, he simply stared back. “The one that’s transferring is my daughter. And I’ll be straight up with you. She’s not the best student to have around.” Jeno arched his brow in a questioning manner upon hearing the description from the apparent mother of the transferee. “She’s hard to handle. A delinquent, in other terms.”

Jeno didn’t know what to reply. He’d be asking, “So what’s this got to do with me?” But the woman already answered that mental question of his, saying, “As president I think you’re the most suitable person to take care of her.” Jeno blinked his eyes rapidly. Heaving a silent sigh, he licked his lower lip and looked to the table for a moment. “You want me to keep an eye on her?” Jeno asked, inferring from her previous comment.

The woman sucked in her lips and nodded firmly. “She’s been moving from college to college and she never seems to stay for longer than a semester. I’m hoping to stop this by having her be tamed.” Jeno placed his hands firmly on his thighs, leaning in as the side of his lips crept up into a small smirk. “What do I get out of this?” Ah, of course. The golden question. What could Jeno do? He was genuinely curious. And he was never one to do something if it didn’t benefit him in some way.

“I’ll pay you for it.” Jeno couldn’t even bat an eye as her words went in his ears and settled in his mind. He couldn’t help but gap his mouth open ever so slightly. He knew the woman was rich. He began to think about just how much is she willing to pay for such a job. “She’s rich so I could negotiate with her.” Jeno thought to himself, clearly already intrigued.

“How much?” The woman raised both her eyebrows, as if surprised that she’s been asked that question. “Two thousand every month. I’m willing to pay more if you do a good job and she doesn’t get into trouble for the first half of the semester.” Jeno chuckled for a second, nodding his head as he began to felt happy. Looks like he didn’t need to negotiate after all. But he also wondered if she’s paying him this much due to how hard the job could be. Either way, blinded by money, Jeno placed his palm firmly on the table and whispered, “Deal.” with much determination.

I was out at a restaurant. And though I knew I had fo attend college soon, I didn’t give two shits. I simply ordered a ribeye steak for dinner and enjoyed the luxuries of spending the money in my credit card away into thin air.

I was just finishing my last bite when my phone dinged. Curious, I flipped my phone screen side up since I haven’t looked at it the moment I stepped into the restaurant. The sight of the notification had my eyes rolling even before I opened it. “College of NCT?” I questioned, reading over the words sent from my mother. So that’s the new college I’m attending. I didn’t even have time to mentally prepare. “Thanks for telling me so late.” I muttered, turning off my phone and shoving it in my pocket and left the restaurant after making my payment.

No one was at home, as per usual. My parents usually working late every single day. It feels as if they’re never home. I got ready for bed, getting comfortable and letting my body sink into the silk sheets and fluffy blanket. I spent the night scrolling through Instagram stories. Just then, I pressed my thumb down on the screen, making it stop on one specific story that a follower of mine posted.

“Isn’t that the college I’m suppose to go to?” I asked myself, squinting my eyes to get a clear view of the picture. It was a group of girls, and behind them was the college crest. I smacked my lips, nodding in affirmation after I confirmed it. I got curious, spending more time to observe her next few stories. I tilted my head in awe, watching as she took a video of herself preparing some party somewhere on campus.

I texted a reply to her story asking, “What are you guys preparing for?” I rolled over so that I was laying on my stomach, shoulders to my ears as I waited for her reply. A reply popped up, making me instantly click on it. I gaped my mouth open, a mischievous chuckle escaping. “A party for the freshmen? Well I’m not a freshman but it’s still a party.” With a shrug I laid back down, turning off my phone as taking a mental note of when the party was so that I could have my fun.

I knew very well I had classes to get to before the party but I simply chose to skip. It’s only the start of the year anyways so I assumed that there wasn’t anything important for me to know, except for the party of course. It’s held on a Friday night, like all parties do. I decided to wear something casual, a sweater and wide legged jeans, something that doesn’t scream, “This girl is from a rich family.” I had to blend in, right?

While taking my necessities on the kitchen counter, my eyes slowly went to the cabinet where my parents stored their alcohol. I looked left and right, as if I was being watched, thinking if I should grab a bottle. But, with a happy giggle, I skipped on over and slide open the glass door, eyes glazing over the many bottles of different alcohols. Without giving it much thought, I grabbed the bottle that seemed to have the largest cotent and shoved it into my bag and went off.

I had to the take the train here, of course, again keeping up with my theme of not looking rich. The number of eyes I’d be receiving if I were to roll into their parking lot with my white lamborghini would have been countless. I took slow steps to the gate, eyes looking over the whole campus to get a glimpse of it. With a sigh, I said, perhaps too loudly, “It looks exactly the same as every college!” I glanced over my shoulder, a few eyes on me as they walked past but I shrugged and continued walking.

Entering the school, it was pretty easy having to know where the party was. I just had to follow the large crowd of youngsters. Loud chatters could be heard all around me. The more steps I took to the venue, the more I began to think about what was I even doing here. It’s a party, yes. But what was I doing here with freshmen? I shook my head as if clearing slate, wanting to take this outing as, “I should get a feel for the college anyways.”

I stepped in. It was an outdoor party, fairy lights dangling from tree to tree, making the area illuminated with an orange hue. There were circular white tables all over and equally spaced apart. I flashed an unimpressed expression, eyes drooping and body slightly slouched as I gaped my mouth open. “The fuck kind of party is this?” I questioned with a shake of my head, pinching my temples as I hear the most boring party music that being played through the speakers.

I made my way over to the pantry first thing, grabbing a plate and shoving whatever food I could till it was full. I grabbed an empty cup from the side and started to walk around for a place to sit. As I looked around, disappointed started to wash over me. The party felt too formal, but it also wasn’t since there were people jumping and dancing to whatever gross music the DJ chose to play.

I took out the bottle of alcohol, realising I had pulled out vodka. Either way, with a shrug of my shoulders, I opened the bottle and poured at least half into the red cup, sliding the bottle back in my bag discreetly. I leaned forward, elbows on the table letting it support my upper body as I took slow bites of whatever food I had on my plate. I bobbed my head slowly, trying to get a liking for the music being played but I groaned in despair. “Who even is the DJ. Whatever they’re playing sucks.” I turned my head to where the DJ was, he was banging his head so furiously and partying as if it’s the best song he’s ever played.

“Must be Lucas then.” I flinched and jumped around at the voice behind my back. It was a guy. I observed him up and down, he looked like any regular student, except for the fact that he’s way above average in the attractiveness scale. “And who might you be?” I questioned with a smile, unconsciously lifting up my cup and taking a sip.

He shoved his hands into his pockets, weight being placed on one leg as he leaned back slightly. “Lee Donghyuck. But I should be the one asking you that, right? You don’t look like a student here.” Donghyuck tilted his head to the side, a smile cracking on his lips. I huffed, placing the cup down roughly on the table. “Well, I’m about to be.” He squinted his eyes at me as if he knew something but tried to keep a neutral face.

“Can you tell this Lucas guy to play something better? This does not feel like a party at all.” Donghyuck scoffed at my comment, nodding his head with much agreement. “Right?! There isn’t even any alcohol.” He whined, shaking his shoulders from left to right and scrunching his face up like an unhappy baby. “Want some?” I asked, jerking my head down to the cup. He blinked his eyes rapidly, peeking into the drink. “You bought vodka? How’d you even know there wasn’t going to be drinks here?”

I chuckled in response, eyes staring at the drink for a moment before going back to meeting his gaze. “Could say I have my ways. But with the knowledge that it’s a freshmen party, it’s pretty clear that there won’t be any alcohol.” I wanted to gag at the way I spoke that. I was sounding too formal explaining something so simple. “Whoever planned this party can suck on toes.”

Donghyuck laughed out loud, leaning back and holding his stomach. “Oh God finally someone said it! Lee Jeno is in fact the most boring president there is!” He continuously banged his fists on the table, bursting with glee as he made fun of whoever Lee Jeno was. Donghyuck grabbed my cup and finished the entirety of the vodka, hissing as he swallowed. “Well I don’t know who you are but have fun. Don’t worry I’ll try to change the DJ.” With a flirtatious wink, he sauntered off, disappearing into the crowd in a matter of seconds.

I poured myself another half cup, downing it sip by sip and pouring again. The cycle went on and I already feel it kicking in, head beginning to spin ever so slightly as I even struggled to stand up. “Fuck.” I whispered, thinking about how drunk I already was as I lost track of how much I’ve downed in the past hour. I looked around, my vision blurred with little to no focus. Suddenly, the song changed, a huge drop was about to hit. I bobbed my head with a giggle, the music finally being something I could actually jam to.

I glanced down at my phone when the crowd settled down. Squinting my eyes, I realise that it was getting close to twelve in the morning. I shoved my phone in my bag and took wary steps, unstable each time I walked past a person and having to touch their shoulder for support. I stopped by a tree, panting as if I’ve run two kilometres to get here. I wasn’t feeling good at all. The world that was spinning in my head suddenly shuts down as my ears blocked out every noise in my surroundings, my vision getting worse and worse. Maybe I shouldn’t have bought the vodka.

I suddenly began coughing, my stomach starting to churn as I gagged, feeling as if I’m about to vomit any minute. I released my grip off the tree trunk, placing both hands in my knees as I hunched over, continuously coughing. I was about to collapse when I was suddenly being held up by my waist. “Woah you good there?” I didn’t know who it was, nor did I care. I let my body go weak, legs unable to support me no longer. “Hey what do you think of birds that get shot-” And just like that, it came out. The vomit, I mean. All the food I’ve eaten, the vodka. I realised I vomited on this person’s shirt, making him let go of me and taking steps back in shock. And before I could even hear them say anything, I passed out unconscious.

I winced in pain the moment I gained my consciousness. My body couldn’t move an inch and my head was banging, only making me place a hand on my head with little to no hope that that’ll help with the dizziness even the slightest bit. I slowly fluttered my eyes open, closing them back instantly as I was being blinded the lights of wherever I was at.

I opened back my eyes slightly, seeing a few figures standing around and looking down on me. I swallowed, trying to sit up straight but instantly failing, dropping my head back on the couch. The door was suddenly slammed opened, making me flinch at the sudden shock that flowed throughout my body.

“What’s such a big matter than I had to be called here?” A guy with a low voice half-shouted. He sounded extremely furious. Another guy came bursting in, going past the angry one and standing right in front of me. I narrowed my eyes, focusing on one random spot to get my vision to focus. And once I did, I was met with the sight of a bunch of men. All of them being ridiculously attractive.

“The fuck am I dreaming? Suddenly I’m dreaming.” I said with a giggle, putting my hands up in front of me and opening them up as if showing a rainbow. All of them kept silent till the angry one heaved an annoyed sigh. “Who even is she?” He asked. The one beside him groaned, placing a palm on his forehead. “Didn’t you read my text?! She literally vomited on my shirt!”

“And if you aren’t aware, she’s not even from our school!” I furrowed my eyebrows, his shouting making my head hurt even worse. “Bitch shut up you’re too loud.” I mumbled, rolling my eyes and waving a lazy hand to no specific person. He scoffed and leaned forward as if wanting to throw a punch but was quickly held back.

I made eye contact with every one of them. They were looking right back, simply staring as if they don’t know what to do. “So you’re saying she crashed here, Ten?” Another person questioned. “Well she was drunk.” He replied, folding his arms and huffing. I noticed how the angry one kept looking at me. He had his eyes squinted and staring meticulously.

Jeno couldn’t help but try and put the pieces together. Someone that wasn’t from his school apparently crashed their freshmen party and she said she’s about to be part of the school. It became obvious to Jeno that she could be the woman’s daughter. He wasn’t told when she would start attending since he had forgotten to ask about that crucial information, but it seemed like he didn’t have to. However, being way too tired to handle such a problem...

“Why did you even bring her here? Send her out. If the higher ups find out, I’m dead, not you idiots. This is why I didn’t want to allow alcohol in the first place.” He growled, voice getting lower than before and sending a shiver down my spine. And he left the room as quickly as he got in. Everyone let out sighs of relief the moment he did, as if his presence were choking them to death. “What did he even mean by that? It’s not like she knew about the no alcohol rule.” One grumbled. “Because she’s not suppose to be here in the first place!”

“Can you stand?” One of them held their hand out. I grabbed it as they helped to pull me up, my back instantly slouching with bended knees to get my balance. “S-Should one of us send you home or?” He looked to the others, silently asking for either their help or their opinion. One of them shrugged and folded his arms. “Wait!” The guy I vomited on shouted.

“Did you say you aren’t from here but will he attending soon?” He leaned close to my face, to which I responded with a lean back. I blinked my eyes rapidly and nodded my head slowly, not sure of where he’s getting at. He immediately snapped his fingers as his mouth gaped open, so as his eyes as if a lightbulb appeared and glowed over his head. “You’re the transferee, aren’t you?!”

“What are you talking about, Ten?”

“Haechan I thought you knew about this? About the new student that’s transferring.” The person, now I remembered to be the Donghyuck I had a small conversation earlier, widened his eyes, flickering them from me to Ten. “Jeno didn’t tell me anything.” Ten groaned and shook his head. “Some vice president you are.” “Maybe Jeno doesn’t even know.”

“Winwin’s right. You can’t trust Ten. Who knows where he got this information.” “Twitter obviously.”“I’ll literally throw you off a building, Sungchan.”

Though I was still feeling a little sick in the stomach and head, it didn’t take me long to figure out what they’re talking about. Apparently Haechan is the vice president while I assumed this Jeno guy to be the president, with information from my previous chat Donghyuck, which now I knew to be Haechan. “Can I just sleep somewhere?” I croaked out, smacking my dried lips and running a hand through my hair. “I’ll do it.” The one that held my arm said, lifting his free hand up lazily. “Let’s go.”

I was taken to another room, which seemed to be a dorm. His room didn’t seem to look like a huge mess, but it wasn’t the cleanest either. He guided me through the door and settled me down on his bed. He went back to close the door and sat down on the floor, motioning his hand to the bed and saying, “You can sleep on my bed.” to which I responded with immediately plopping my body down and closing my eyes.

I was about to drift off to sleep when he suddenly cleared his throat, as if wanting to get my attention. I opened my eyes, seeing him sitting in front of me with his legs crossed and knees pulled to his chest. “Is it true that you’re the transferee Ten was talking about?” With a sigh, I nodded my head. “Why didn’t you come for your classes this week then?” Mark asked. “I’m lazy?” I replied with a light chuckle. “Honestly I don’t care. I just go when I feel like it.” I added on, shrugging. He pursed his lips into a thin line. “What course you taking?” “Biomedical science.”

“I’m Mark, by the way.” He introduced himself suddenly with a soft smile. I reciprocated it. “_____.” He looked around his room, seeming to be in thought. “Don’t worry about whatever just happened. We can settle it tomorrow.” He turned around, reaching his hand out to pull on a string that turned off the lamp light that was on when we stepped in. With that, I closed my eyes, instantly falling asleep the moment I did.

The next day, I was woken by the sunlight hitting my face, the windows and curtains that were closed last night now fully opened and lighting up the room. I took in my surroundings, spotting Mark sleeping on the floor, curled up with no pillows to hug or support his head. I sat up, rubbing my eyes and bending doen to tap Mark on the shoulder. “Good morning...?” I whispered.

I mentally chuckled to myself, thinking how I even ended up in such a situation. I came to a freshmen party, got drunk, got myself into trouble with a group of men I don’t even know. And now I was waking up in a dorm of a guy. He has still yet to wake up, so I shook his shoulder again, a little rougher this time. “Wake up.” I said, raising my voice slightly. I turned to my phone which was peeking from underneath the pillow to check the time. 10:05AM.

“Hey.” I shot my head back to Mark, who slowly got up with a grunt. He slouched his body forward and ruffled his messy hair vigorously. “Wait what time is it?” Mark asked, looking around frantically and patting his sweatpants for what I assumed to be his phone. “Chill it’s 10:05. I mean, unless you have morning classes.”

Mark placed a hand on his chest, exhaling slowly in relief. “No I don’t. Mine starts at one.” I clicked my tongue and nodded my head, taking in the irrelevant information. My phone dinged again, and it was from my mother. “Great. My mom found out about last night. How did she even know? I blocked her from my socials. And since when did she even care about what I do?” I thought to myself out loud, making Mark look at me and listening. “Sounds like you don’t have a good mother.” He commented. I scoffed at his words. “Well whatever you’re thinking just times that by a hundred.” Mark chuckled, standing up on his feet. 

Mark looked down on his phone, his eyes scanning down the screen quickly before he lifted his eyes up to me. “Get ready by twelve. I just got told to send you to Jeno.” He shoved his phone into his sweatpants, wanting to walk away but he stopped when I shouted out his name, turning around sharply and humming in question. 

“Is Jeno someone important...?” I asked, sounding somewhat scared. Mark chuckled lowly, scaring me even more like whatever words that were about to come out of his mouth would send me away from this school. “He’s... You could say an intimidating president of the student council. Like those bosses that tops everyone.” Mark described him carefully, the tone of admiration shining through slightly and thinking deep to find what other things about Jeno he could say. 

“But he’s fine when you actually know him. He just puts on his tense nature during meetings, which scares most of our council members only during those meetings. For your information, he was the one that came in the room we were at yesterday looking pissed and angry.”

I looked up, trying to recall last night’s disaster. I did refer to him as “angry guy” in my mind, but I never bothered to take a close look at him and remember how he looked. “Should I be worried? “Depends on how you act when you’re talking to him.” Mark replied quickly and turned around to walk away into the bathroom. 

I laid back on my bed, looking through my socials while waiting for him to finish showering. He came out after about ten minutes, now wearing jeans and a white shirt. Mark jerked his head to the bathroom, holding up the small towel he came out with and using it to dry his hair. I raised both my eyebrows and sat up, walking into the bathroom.

While showering I kept thinking about Jeno. I kept telling myself that I didn’t need to be scared, he didn’t sound scary at all. From the way Mark described him, I assumed he was like those “Hard Outer but Soft Inner” type of guy, which trust me I have met plenty of times. How could Jeno be any different? I had to wear the same clothes, which I found to be slightly uncomfortable but I just had to live with it till I move into the dorms. 

I followed behind Mark as he took me to where Jeno wanted to meet me. Mark gave a pat on the shoulder, leaning in and whispering a “Goodluck.” when we ended up in front of the door. As I heard Mark’s footsteps walking away and eventually disappearing, I looked up at the sign on the door. “Student council.” I clicked my tongue, shrugging and going in without giving much thought. 

The moment I stepped foot into the room, I felt it. I felt what Mark meant by his aura scaring the council members. The room was overpowered by the energy Jeno was radiating. I stared at him, not moving an inch. He didn’t move as well, simply sitting casually as his eyes met mine. It sent chills down my spine, just his stare alone. It felt as if I was being stripped with him scrutinizing my every physical detail. “Hey.” Jeno greeted. Surprisingly, it sounded light and normal. But who knows? It could just be for this one greeting. 

I idled my way to the chairs, looking around I recognised this room. It was the one I woke up in last night when I was being surrounded by a whole gang. I slowly pulled out the chair and took the seat right next to him. I didn’t know I could be this intimidated. No words were yet to be said, and with each second that passed by, I wished that I could just melt and disappear from this place. 

“I didn’t call you here to interrogate you about what happened last night. Though I found it odd how you came waltzing into the freshmen party that you weren’t invited to and caused yourself trouble.” Jeno leaned forward against the table, forearms up with his fingers interlocked and parallel to the table. I furrowed my eyebrows, forehead creased. I gulped, allowing myself some leeway from my tensed up posture to slouch my body into the seat. “Uh so do you need me to explain or-”

“No. I just need you to move into the dorm at building A, level five, dorm number fifty six tomorrow and start coming for class. From what I know, you skipped every single one this week. I don’t think that a good way to start the year, don’t you agree?” I didn’t quite know what to pick up from the way he was talking. It sounded professional, yet sending me a mental message that said, “I didn’t want to be here but oh look.” He could even sound like the leader of a wolf pack, if wolves could ever talk.

I stared into his dark, soulless eyes. I could see the annoyance in there like it’s lodged in his pupils. But he tried to keep it hidden with neutral expression. “I might not do the latter.” I said with a bob of my shoulders, as if I did not give a single care for the world, which to some extend, was true. “In fact I could pack my shit up and fly to London tonight.” 

“Too bad. I don’t think that’ll be happening. Doing background research, I got to know that we’re taking the same course. And if I don’t see you in class next Monday, I can easily call backup and drag you into class.” Jeno placed a finger upright on the table, leaning in as his eyes widened and narrowed down on me, making him the only thing in my focus and preventing me from breaking our gaze. 

The more I stared at him, the more my eyes trailed to not just his eyes that looked like a puppy’s, but his other features, from his hair to his nose and to his lips, which were all in perfect proportion within a beautifully sculptured face structure. I had to admit, he was attractive, more attractive than other guys I’ve been in contact with, he was however more to the cuter side. I wondered how I even passed such a face last night. But his face did not match his attitude at all. He had the look of someone bubbly and just simply adorable, not whatever he’s been radiating.

“Fuck what are you? My bodyguard or something? I do what I want.” I said, pushing the thought of his attractiveness out of my mind. The corner of his lips lifted up slightly. “Not while you’re here.” I leaned back, copying his expression as I scoffed in amusement. “Yeah sure.” I waved my hands in the air as if wanting to spread my sarcasm throughout the room. “If there isn’t anything else to discuss...” I trailed off, pushing my chair back freely and standing up, taking slow and relaxed strides to the door. I opened it and went out, just when the door was about to close behind me, Jeno shouted, “Monday, ten am!” the door slamming shut after. 

I let out a ‘tsk’ and rolled my eyes, something I wasn’t able to do moments ago. “Drag me there, Mr. Lee Jeno.” I grumbled under my breath, folding my arms and making my way off campus, taking out my phone as I called my helper to get all my stuff moved to my designated dorm while I thought about what to eat for lunch. 

I spent the weekend locked up in the dorm, to which I realised was much smaller than my room back home. But what did I expect anyways? I had to limit the things I had to bring here by at least a quarter, which led me to having a headache since I had to prioritize what I needed. I was simply online shopping, mostly for clothes and books. I already had my dorm tidied up too. I was just about to hit the confirm order button when it suddenly didn’t work. I keyed in my credit card information again, the same bolded in red error sign popping up on my computer. I huffed loudly, knowing exactly why this happened. 

“Why did you deactivate my credit card?” I asked angrily the moment my mother picked up the phone. She gave me a long pause, to which fueled my anger more the longer she kept silent. “You’ve been spending too much money when you’re suppose to be concentrating in school.” I squinted my eyes which are still on the computer. I swung my chair around and away from the computer, crossing my legs as I let my free hand dangle off the arm rest. “What does money have to do with me concentrating in school?”

“I’m saying it’s a distraction and I’m not having you do anything that’ll keep you distracted from your studies.” And just like that, she hung up. I brought my phone back down from my ear, letting it drop on my lap as I leaned my head back, letting out an exaggerated groan. “How am I suppose to buy lunch without my card?” I suddenly asked myself, remembering the fact that I went cashless instantly when I got my card. I turned my chair back to my study table and reached my hand out for my wallet. I opened it quickly, placing my hand above my head at the sight. “Barely five dollars? Shit...” 

I smacked my lips, looking around the room as I thought about what to do to solve this matter. Did my mom not take into consideration that I could be starving to death? I might as well do so and die of starvation. “What the hell are my options?” I questioned myself out loud. I was suddenly in a trance, my mind making calculations all over as I tried to lay out all the possible things I could do. Yes, I was this serious since I was that desperate for food right at that moment. I cursed, jumping off my chair and sliding my phone into the pocket of my hoodie and storming out of the door.

I paused in front of the door, the same sign on it sending my migraines if I were to look at it for any longer. I shook my head and burst the door open. To my surprise and luck, Jeno was sitting at the table, head tilted down and not giving a single reaction to my entrance. Silence filled the room for a moment till he spoke out, “Who are you to think you can come walking in here without knocking?” As if the world was put on slow motion, Jeno lifted his eyes off the table and to me, his head not moving at all as he pierced his gaze into mine like a sharp blade. 

“Got a little situation for you.” I placed emphasis on the word ‘little’ to lighten the mood but I gave myself a mental slap afterwards, thinking that I gave off an impression to make it seem like it was a bigger problem than I intended it to be. But to be fair, it was a big problem. It was a food problem for God’s sake.

Jeno didn’t give me a reply, still staring at me, stern and fixated on me like he’d turn me to stone. “Apparently my mom deactivated my credit card and now I have zero money on me and I’m hungry.” Jeno raised an eyebrow at the matter, giving off the “So what?” kind of vibes which is absolutely not welcoming at all. 

“And?” Jeno let out, his eyes now back on the table as he began to write something down. I sighed, glancing sideways as I thought about how much I was hating this. The atmosphere, the air that circulated the room could suffocate me till I stopped breathing, it was way too tense for my liking. “Yeah well uh you’re the only person I know so yes I’m asking you for money. I want my lunch.” I blurted out quickly, wanting to get it out there in his face. Jeno released his grip on his pen midair, letting it fall to the table. He shot is eyes up to be like rubber bands, a scrutinized expression painted on his face. “Seriously? That’s what you came here for? You could have asked anyone.”

Jeno regretted letting that out. He remembered that his job was to take care of this girl, as much as he was annoyed at the fact that he was burdened with such a matter, he had his mind set on the money, letting that being the reason for him to put up with this and not burst his head off from the annoyance he keeps getting whenever she showed up. 

“Fine. But get your mother to settle this soon. And you’re paying me back after.” Jeno reached for his phone out of his back pocket, and while he scrolled his thumb down the screen, his eyes went back to me, making me tense my body up again. “Sit down?” Jeno questioned, but it was more of a demand. I quickly cleared my throat, glancing sideways before speeding up to take a seat at the exact some spot as yesterday. 

We ordered take out and when it arrived, we were eating in pure silence, only the sounds of us munching and chewing to be heard. I watched as Jeno did his work while he ate, pen in one hand, hamburger on the other. The hamburger was close to his mouth as he kept taking a bite even though he has yet to swallow whatever’s left, resulting in his cheeks puffing up and chewing with his mouth full. 

“What work you doing?” I asked out of curiosity, leaning in and peeking at the papers. It didn’t take me long to notice that it was related to the course I’m taking. Jen sighed, only speaking once he was done with his bite. “Assignments. You wouldn’t know since you have yet to attend class.” He mentioned it again, his words that were repeated sounding more harsh than it did before like he’s drilling it in my brain and wanting to pressure me. 

“Jeez...” I mumbled, purposely making it loud for him to hear as I watch him roll his eyes in annoyance, which made him look cute if we’re being honest. “Then why do it in the student council room when you can just do it at your dorm?” I asked another question, sounding like those annoying children that just keeps throwing questions at you. And if you were short tempered, you’d explode trying to talk to them. “Because I have president duties to take care of as well.” Jeno replied in the most monotone voice ever. “Will you actually drag me to class if I chose not to go?”

“I don’t care if you have the will to go or not. I’ll drag your brain and body to the lecture hall if I needed to.” Jeno was quick to reply, I could tell he was already ticked off by me. I finished my drink, the sound that came from sucking air through the straw of an empty cup now filling the room. “If you don’t know, you have quite the reputation, especially on Twitter. If you don’t want to blow up with an image of me forcing you into class, I suggest you go willingly.” Jeno added on, clicking his pen and placing it down on the table as he leaned into his chair, a satisfied look in his eyes as he stared at his work. 

“Fine. I’ll go. If you feed me lunch every day we have class.” Jeno scoffed at my comment, his tongue glazing over his upper teeth as he eyed me up and down. “You are aware that you are paying back for the food I buy just so you’ll attend class, right?” I puckered my lips, thinking it over. “Then my decision to go is still on hold.” I flashed a cheeky eye smile at him, giggling softly as I played around with the empty cup in my hand. Jeno squinted his eyes on me, shaking his head afterwards. “You can go once you’re finished. And take the trash out when you do.” Jeno jerked his chin up to the door. He was well aware that I was done with my food, I guess he wanted me out as quickly as possible, that I could infer. 

I rose up from my seat and grabbed the plastic bags, exiting the room and closing the door behind me. While I went to the trashcan, I thought about how I was actually considering to go to class, thinking about how I could see this emotionless guy with pent up anger burst into flames if I tried to annoy him more. But in the end, it all came down to whether I would have enough energy to leave my bed in the morning.

I ended up sleeping very late that day, close to four in the morning actually. Spending those hours with reading and also falling down the rabbit hole of Youtube’s late night algorithm because once you start, it’ll never end. Despite the late hour that I fell asleep, I was still able to wake up before ten. I realised it was eight, making me roll in my bed and groaning in despair. I kept thinking to myself how did I even wake up this early and why? For one, I wished that I overslept so I wouldn’t have to attend class. But then I remembered the huge problem I had to deal with if I chose to do so.

After scrolling through my socials for a bit, I rolled out of bed, practically falling to the floor right affer since I have yet to gather any energy for my tired body and dragged my feet unwillingly to the bathroom to get ready. I didn’t know what to bring for class. I stared at the stack of books on my study table while I had my bag wide open after I shoved my other necessities in. I scratched my head. “Why do I do this?” I muttered to myself and simply grabbed the book at the top of the stack and went out.

Knowing which lecture hall to get to thanks to my mother informing me way before I even step foot into college, it was easy for me to find it and head in. There weren’t many people, I’d assume about ten scattered throughout the seats. I shrugged and planned to seat somewhere close to the back, however I ended up sitting at the second last row. I noticed how I had plenty of time before class but not enough for me to do anything outside. Not knowing what to do, I shoved in my earpiece into my ears and listened to music, opening the first page of the textbook I bought and making small doodles on the cover page.

As if on cue, the moment I looked up from the textbook, my hand still on it with my pencil just hovering, Jeno walked in. And it’s as if the whole hall turned into a runway. All the lights in the room were switched off, with one light to shine on him and only him. The light above hovered over him as he went up the flight of stairs.

To my surprise, he was wearing a green tropical button up, tucked into his black jeans along with black sneakers. All of it made his seemingly perfect body proportion prominent. His black hair that seemed to capture all the light was expertly slicked back with just a few strands falling down his forehead. Just as he walked past my row of seats, his eyes glanced to mine, and for a moment time stopped, he was frozen mid-walk as we made eye contact. I hate to admit it but, he did look effortlessly stunning.

I blinked my eyes rapidly, shaking my head to take myself back to reality. I turned my head to the back, Jeno was already sitting right behind me. He exhaled sharply while removing his bag off his shoulder. He mouthed something that I couldn’t make out since my music was overpowering every sound in the world. I widened my eyes and took one side off, asking, “What did you say?”

“Congratulations on coming.” Jeno said in the most non-celebratory tone ever. I slide my back down the seat, legs extending as I resumed my doodle of an eye. I could hear Jeno shuffling in his seat as he tried to take out whatever he needed for class. “We aren’t using that textbook, by the way.” I snapped my head back to face him. “Seriously?” Jeno scoffed and folded his arms, shoulders relaxed as he leaned back. “That textbook contains chapters five to ten. We’re only at chapter one, which is in the book before.” Jeno tilted his head to one side, a cunning and smile of mischief forming on his face. “Do you not bother knowing beforehand what the hell you’re learning this semester?”

I shook my head confidently at his question that I assumed wasn’t supposed to have a reply. “Never bothered.” I simply said. The lecturer walked in and class started. For the whole two hours, I was on my phone, reading, drawing, whatever the professor has said went in one ear and out the other. But I did try to take in some information, though I knew nothing about what’s been going on.

After class, I waited for everyone to leave, not wanting to handle the fact that I need to squeeze my way through everyone to get out the door. I was about to stand up when a hand was placed firmly on my table, which made me stop in my actions to look up, seeing it was Jeno. “What the hell-”

“Did you understand anything that he went through?” Jeno jerked his head to be back where the professor was still there packing his stuff. I sat back down, hand lifted up to swirl it around carefree. “Eh here and there. Some things I knew from last year.” I said with a shrug. Jeno nodded his head with sucked lips. “I’m surprised you even bothered listening. All I saw you do was using your phone and drawing.” I chuckled. “I chose to do Biomedical for a reason.”

“Anyways, you need to catch up on whatever you missed since we have a mini quiz that’s coming soon and I’m well aware that you only know five percent of whatever’s going to be tested.” I gaped my mouth open in pure shock with protuberant eyes. “Mini quiz?! It’s only January!” I raised my voice slightly, being wary as I waited for the professor to walk out.

“We have a quiz at the end of every month.” My mouth was hung open as this point, jaw to the floor as I blinked my eyes rapidly after. “None of the colleges I’ve been to even do that!” I was now able to shout, echos being followed up with it as it spreads throughout the hall. “Well now you know.” Jeno retorted back with a halfhearted smile.

“So what do I go to the council room or something?” I questioned with raised brows. Jeno suddenly slammed a sticky note on my table, I glanced down at it before looking back at him. “Come to this address at six. I’ll teach you from there. And bring the right textbook.” Just like that, he turned around sharply and walked out of the hall, though it didn’t look like a dramatic exit, to me it was.

I peeled the sticky note off my table, inspecting it closely as I read the address that Jeno wrote in such a neat handwriting, but it made sense for him to write like that. I could tell from his character. Curious, I decided to search it up while I made my way back to the dorm. Sliding the sticky note into my pocket, I read whatever was on the screen the moment Google finished loading.

“Wait it’s a tutoring centre?” I tilted my head a few degress as the name of the address I keyed in was shown on screen. I began to wonder why he wanted to teach me at a tuition centre when I could simply go to his dorm, or the council room. Though I was thinking long and hard about it, the moment I entered my dorm, it completely went out my mind and plopped myself onto my bed, getting comfortable as I fell asleep instantly when I closed my eyes.

It has always been a routine of mine to take an afternoon nap. I did wake up at three but went back to sleep since I felt that it was too early for me to get up. I knew that the tutoring centre was within walking distance so I didn’t have to rush either. I woke up for the second time, seeing that it was five fifteen. Though I knew I had time, I decided to head out and make a trip to Starbucks before I went there.

I got my drink and I was able to arrive at the centre right on time. When I entered, I was completely clueless, I didn’t know where Jeno was and all I could see were rooms after rooms. I went up to the font desk where there was a woman sitting down. “Um hi can I know where Lee Jeno is?” She flashed a warm smile and motioned her hand toward the hallway. “Right down there. Just find room twenty four.” I downshifted my head as a way to say thank you and followed the direction of her hand.

I looked left and right, trying to find the room number. I finally spotted it, walking up and peeking my head at the window on the door that gave me view on the inside. What I saw shocked me. The room was filled with kids, sitting down and concentrating on their own work while Jeno was at the front of the room, with a boy next to him.

I knocked on the door and walked in, never really thought about waiting for him to say, “Come in.” The kids has their heads turned to me for only a moment before going back to their work, not giving me my entrance much thought. “You guys can pack up and leave now! Don’t study too hard and make sure you rest, okay?”

“Yes, Jeno!” With that, the room got noisy with the kids talking to each other while they packed their bags. I went deeper into the room the give them space to leave. It was now only Jeno the kid next to Jeno that has yet to leave. I couldn’t help but get close to them to see what they were doing.

I gaped my mouth in awe, realising that Jeno was teaching the young boy. Jeno had his arm around the boy’s shoulder, having to be on his knees to meet the height of the boy while he bent his back forward to put his face next to his. The boy was extremely attentive while Jeno gave out clear explanations. I noticed a few things about Jeno while I was watching this. One, he’s nothing like how he is in college. He seemed bright and nice, gentle with the kids. Two, he’s extremely smart. Of course he would be. He’s working at a tutoring centre teaching kids. Three, I saw him smile for the first time.

Jeno helped the boy pack his bag and when he was about to leave, he turned around, waving his hand happily to Jeno. Jeno did the same, and when I turned my head from the boy to him, he had such a big smile, a smile to wide that his eyes formed a thin line. His smiling face resembled so much of a puppy’s. It shocked me to see this side of him, a completely new one that seemed to only be reserved within these walls. “Bye bye!” The boy squealed, closing the door behind him.

Jeno walked back to the front seat, taking out the textbook as well as his stationery. He looked up to me. “Aren’t you going to sit down?” And Jeno was back to being his usual self, turning to stone real quick as if none of his cheerfulness happened moments ago with the kids. I placed my coffee on the table and sat next to him. “You’re working here?” I asked very slowly, almost in a “I refuse to believe this is true” tone.

He nodded his head in response. “Part time. They let me use the room after my shift so I usually study here.” Jeno, despite being tall and having his knees to his chest while sitting on the kid sized chair, seemed comfortable and he pulled it in to get closer to the table. Jeno began teaching me and as expected, he thought me well, better than the professor actually. He sounded quite lively, again being different from his regular stoned nature as he had an aura that every kid would love their teachers to have. “So do you get it now?”

“No.” “Are you fucking serious?” “Yes.”

Jeno was instantly frustrated. He suddenly took his bag from the side, taking out packets of what seemed to be gummy bears and other types of jellies and throwing his bag back down. He opened a packet furiously and began eating at such a fast rate. “What are you doing?” I asked, eyes widening as I watch him plop one gummy bear into his mouth at a time. “Stress eating, what do you think?” Jeno growled with a roll of his eyes. I brought my head forward, mouth closed and not knowing what to say.

Worried, I quickly let out a, “Oh my God stop I was joking. I heard everything you say! Stop the...” I said while swirling my hand in front of him. “Stress eating.” I finished my sentence. Jeno took in a deep breath and slammed the already finished packet on the table. His eyes trailed from the packet and to me very slowly. “I would’ve killed you if you actually wasted two hours of my time.” Jeno said lowly, his voice never failed to make me shiver as if it sent ice cold water down my body.

“Can I have one...” I asked, not being considerate about the fact that I sent Jeno on a stress eating spree seconds ago. “No.” He quickly replied, and I couldn’t help but frown, looking down on the table. He suddenly slid a packet in front of me, making me mutter, “Thanks.” while the two of us ate in silence after.

We lost track of time, and though the air that circulated us was silent most of the time, we did have chats here and there in attemps to fill in the awkward gaps. I suddenly remembered something, making me let out an “Ah” to which Jeno responded with a hum in question. I took out my wallet and slid out the cash that I took out before coming here. “For yesterday’s lunch.” I muttered. Jeno took the money without saying a word, putting it in his wallet and placing it on the table next to him. “When’s our next class?”

Jeno looked up thoughtfully before answering. “Thursday.” He replied. “Do you have anything to do before then?” Jeno clicked his tongue, nodding. “Of course I do. I need to take care of admin matters, and work.” Jeno talked as if he had a lot on his plate, to which I can clearly see. If he wasn’t studying, he’d be teaching. If he’s not doing either, he still had duties to fulfill as the president.

“Can I follow you around then?” Jeno gave me an unimpressed look. “You could be studying.” I groaned, letting my head fall to the table with my arms below for support. “Can I call you if I don’t know anything?” I questioned, shooting my head up to look at him, who had been staring at me since long ago.

“Why would you need to when I already laid it all out for you just now? Unless you weren’t listening.” Jeno slowly opened another packet of gummies. He was probably on his fifth one at this point. “I still need your number? You’re the only person I know in our course.” I said with a frown, which unconsciously turned into a pout. Jeno arched a brow at me. “I know your number. I’ll just text you later.” I hummed in response, nodding and placing my chin on the palm of my hand as I shoved gummy after gummy into my mouth.

The first quiz of the year was coming in two days. And if we’re being honest, I didn’t do any studying for it at all. The last time I concentrated on something was the time Jeno thought me for those two hours. I got home that night and looked through the notes I’ve taken down but that was the last time I saw it. I’m assuming it’s somewhere in my bag, but I was too lazy to search for it.

I laid down on my bed, boredom being the only thing I’ve been feeling these days as for one, my mother’s keeping track of my spendings which means that I can’t simply go out and do whatever I want, though I did went to an ice cream shop that sold an overly priced ice cream that I wanted to try out. I was disappointed that it didn’t live up to the hype I saw on Instagram. And for two, I had nothing to do. Sure, I had the money. But nowhere to go.

I scrolled through my contacts, which weren’t many to begin with since I wasn’t able to make friends from the constant transfers of schools. I then stopped on Jeno’s. I went over to Whatsapp where he sent a “Hey.” The night after the tutoring session. I replied back but he left me on read never bothered replying still, to which I muttered, “Rude.” as I looked at the two blue ticks beside my last text.

I decided to text him, asking “You free?” I checked his last seen. He was online two minutes ago. Surely, he’d get my notification. Luckily he did, he went online and blue ticked my text. As I watch the words “Typing...” just below his name, my heart starting beating faster ever so slightly for some reason. Why was I even getting nervous?

“Yeah. Why?” I could already hear his monotone voice that read those two words for me in my head. I was quick to reply with a, “Help me study for the quiz on Thursday.” He took about ten minutes to reply. “No. I taught you everything already.” I scrunched up my face at his reaction. What answer was I even thinking? I rolled my eyes in annoyance.

I never met Jeno after that one day. He came in and out of classes as if I was invisible, simply carrying on with whatever he’s been doing before I came here. Though I felt quite lonely, how could I blame him? I’d be too annoying for him to even tolerate.

“Please!” I texted, purposely sounding desperate. “Or else I’m skipping and I don’t have to take the test.” I giggled like a child that stole candy from her friend, wanting to see if I made an impression on him through text. Jeno replied so fast, making me laugh out loud. “Do you not care about your grades? It’s the first quiz and you’re already skipping. Do you want my hardwork of teaching you go to waste?” He sounded mad as I read that, oh he was definitely mad.

I quickly texted a reply. “Then teach me.” I sent a wink emoji after. Seconds later, he said, “Library, twelve am. Gtg, got a meeting.” I laughed to myself, nodding my head while I placed my phone screen down beside my pillow while I reach for my book from the study table to resume my day reading like how I’ve wasted the rest of my days.

It was late into the night. And at this time of the day, I wouldn’t actually have the brain power to even study. But I guess that Jeno was way too busy that he was only free. I was beginning to feel bad for calling him over to the library this late. Some students were still studying though. The library was dark with only the light at their table switched on, making the whole place just barely lit. I sat down at a random spot. I didn’t bother to bring my textbook since I had everything I needed to know in my notebook.

I heard the door open, and came walking in was Jeno. His outfit instantly caught my eye. This late into the night and he was wearing a loose baby pink suit, baggy blazer and dress pants. His hair that I assumed to be slicked back now all messy and in disarray. He scanned his eyes over the library and instantly spotted me, our eyes locking the whole way as he came to sit down.

“Thank for inviting me this late.” Jeno whispered, though his sarcasm was screaming loudly through his words. I took a moment to simply look at him. He looked tired, worn out. He ruffled his hair, nothing to give it support no longer as he tried to tame the messiness even the slightest bit. He ran a hand down his face as he exhaled. “So.” Jeno started, wasting no time.

Two of us sighed in unison, leaning back into our seats while I picked my phone up from the side to check the time. “One thirty. That’s not too bad.” I said with a shrug. Jeno was scratching the crown of his head, closing his eyes. I couldn’t help but had my eyes superglued to him this whole time. Something about “tired Jeno” just hit different.

“Did you do this on purpose?” Jeno suddenly asked, eyes flying open and darting it down to me. I leaned back, hands in the air swiftly in defence. “Maybe. But! I genuinely needed help in concentrating.” I raised both brows, my lips forming an upside down smile. “So what you can only concentrate when you’re with me?” Jeno questioned again, his voice making it seem like he was putting me on interrogation.

I bobbed my shoulders. “Perhaps so.” “Quick of you to assume that when it’s only been one month.” Jeno said with a smile that didn’t seem like a happy one but rather mischievous and cold. “What have you been doing the whole day wearing... that.” I asked, pointing to the suit he’s still wearing. It was only now that I noticed how he had the first three buttons of his white botton up opened, exposing his skin with his collarbone peeking out ever so slightly. I guess it had been covered by the blazer this whole time.

“Meetings. Haechan wanted us to start dressing formally for who knows what reason. Trying to act like we’re office workers or some shit when he can’t even handle being a vice.” Jeno complained, pressing the side of his hand to his eyebrows to shield his eyes and sighing. “You look fashionable so I guess it’s not all that bad.” I encourage with a nervous chuckle.

“At least we got through whatever we need to know today. We can spend the rest of the day doing nothing.” I blinked my widened eyes rapidly at him. “You’re free tomorrow?” Jeno nodded after pursing his lips into a thin line. “That’s rare.” I said, as if I knew him more than a month.

I went into the hall feeling confident about taking the quiz. To be honest, the topic wasn’t that hard. I am in fact smart, it’s just that I never bothered about my grades and reputation so I laid it off most of the time, like those students who study the day before the exam yet still achieve the highest of marks.

I was waiting for the professor to come in when Jeno came strolling in, the door flung open and I couldn’t believe what’s in my vision. Jeno dyed his hair, and not just any colour, he dyed it a bright baby blue. He stood out so much he was sticking out like a sore thumb. To add on, he wore a blue blazer with jeans to match his hair. He doesn’t even look like he’s taking a quiz today.

Just like everyone else in the hall, I had my eyes on him while he made his way to take his usual seat right behind me. And when he plopped down on his seat, I gaped my mouth extra wide in front of him and scoffed, my eyes trailing up to his hair. “I can’t believe this. You dyed your such in such a colour!” I shouted, maybe too loudly.

Jeno tilted his head downwards and constantly ran his hands through his hair, ruffling it and combing it, going back and forth with the two motions. “Why did you even-” “Tell you later. He’s here.” Jeno jerked his chin to the bottom of the hall when the professor came in. We did the quiz and resumed with the lecture. Luckily for me, I bought the right textbook this time as was able to follow up with the professor. We ended class as I instantly turned around to look at Jeno, still shocked at his drastic change in hair colour, but also impressed by how good it looked on him.

I noticed how most of the girls kept turning their heads to Jeno while they make their way out of the hall, constant whispers and mutters filled the room till everyone got out. “Mm you seem to be popular.” I said, placing my stationary into my bag. Jeno was packing up as well, standing up with a sigh that lasted three days.

“So why did you decide to suddenly dye your hair?” I asked as I closely followed next to Jeno while we went down the flight of stairs. “Are you like those girls on TikTok who dye their hair when they’re stressed out?” I added on, laughing softly after as I shifted all my hair to fall on my right shoulder.

“What? No. I had a party with the council last night. I was dared to dye my hair. They picked the colour.” Jeno said out. “Congratulations, by the way.” I tilted my head up to him, an eyebrow raised. “Why?”

“Because you didn’t do anything to get in trouble this month, excluding the freshmen party incident, as well as annoying me practically every time we meet.” I laughed, nudging him on the shoulder to make him look at me since he’s had his face looking forward the whole time on our way back to the dorms.

“At least I annoy you in a good way.” I said after Jeno looked down and locked eyes with me for a brief moment. I couldn’t help but notice how he smiled ever so softly before he broke away our gaze, a smile so small ot was almost invisible but I still saw it either way.

Jeno and I had this system of having me coming over to the tutoring centre for us to simply go over whatever we were taught that week. Surprisingly, but also not so, I did well on the quiz. Jeno and I continued to have these meetups. And though I thought it was only for studying purposes, I realised how I was focused, not because I had to study, but the fact that Jeno looked breathtaking almost everyday.

Generally, I’d be skipping and dodging every attempt from my mother forcing me to focus on schoolwork. Tutors, actual professors coming over to our home to teach when I’d be running off somewhere not wanting to deal with it. I didn’t feel that with Jeno. “Looks like you know everything.” I realised Jeno was talking and I came zinging back to attention. I nodded my head with a chuckle. “This is an easy chapter to be fair.” I bragged, twirling my pen between finger to finger. We packed our stuff and left the centre, going our separate ways after bidding each other goodnight.

Jeno watched her walk further and further into the distance till her figure grew smaller and finally disappeared when she turned the corner. Jeno looked down his phone, the message from her mother that was sent two hours ago still have yet to be opened. He unlocked his phone, texting a “Got it.” Before making his way over to the address that she sent.

It was a secluded café, hidden in the deeper parts of the neighbourhood where not many would pass by and visit. Jeno saw her sitting by the window, casually sipping on her drink. Jeno took in a deep breath before entering. He quickly made his way over to her, taking the seat opposite. “So.” Jeno exhaled sharply. “The money?” The woman nodded her head and cleared her throat. “I’ll have it wired to you after we’re done here.”

“Then why did you want to meet me?” Jeno tilted his head, eyebrows furrowed as he squinted his eyes. He watched the woman as she sat up straight and placed her hands on her knees. “I just wanted to ask how she’s been doing.” The woman said. Jeno clicked his tongue, nodding his head and glancing sideways before answering, “It wasn’t easy, but worth the money I’m about to get.”

Jeno thought about just how fast time flew by, especially when he was with her. They didn’t even hang out much, just pure study sessions at his part time work place. They never once hung out with a purpose outside of studying, though they’ve been doing it for months. Just like that, the first semester had already ended. At that moment Jeno recalled all the times he’s spent with her like a movie tape that flashed before his eyes. Their every memory vividly etched into his mind, a sudden one suddenly occuring to him the moment he mentioned it.

It was Febuary 14th, Valantines Day. And instantly, I grew scared as to what I had to face this day. It happened every year, at every college I had been. And I just so happen to have class today. I paced back and forth in my small dorm, peeling the dried skin off my lips with my teeth while I fiddled with the hang nails of my thumbs, contemplation of going to class being on my mind for far too long.

Not being able to handle the stress I’ve put on myself, I opened my closer, quickly thumbing through it and taking out a black jacket, along with black sunglasses. If I had to go this far just to attend class, I’d better be receiving some sort of reward from Jeno.

I could remember what happened last year so clearly. The moment I stepped out of the building, lots, and I mean lots of guys were waiting just for me, gifts and presents for them to confess their love which I clearly accepted none. I never wanted their gifts, it wasn’t of value at all, that I could tell with just a glimpse of it. It was annoying. I knew I was popular on my socials but I didn’t know it would have escalated to such extends.

I slowly turned the knob of my door, pushing it open and peeking just my head out, carefully looking both directions before pulling my entire body out into the open hallway. I placed my hood on, pulling it so far as to cover at least half of my face as I adjusted my sunglasses and began walking. If I had bothered, I would have gone through the back exit of this building. How unlucky was I to not do it, forcing myself through main exit of the building.

I gulped anxiously, shoving my hands into the pockets of my jacket as I kept my head tilted down the whole way. I had to take a few steps down a pathway, and just when I wanted to turn a corner, time froze for the shortest of second, a large group of guys, some I’ve seen on campus at some point during my time here, others being complete strangers. They were sitting down on the floor and leaning against the walls as if they’ve been awaiting for my arrival for hours.

I couldn’t even bat an eyelash before they began coming at me. And just like that, I had to sprint like I was being chased by zombies in an apocalypse. I ran for my life, and to who knows where, I was most probably running in circles while trying to find the Science department, but was too occupied by the terror I was faced with to even think straight.

“Fucking hell.” I muttered, already out of breath as I lost track of where I was heading and how long I’ve been running. I looked down at my phone, and out of pure desperation, I unlocked it with shaky fingers, wanting to call the first person that came to mind.

“Jeno!” I screamed a cry for help when I heard his unflattering, “What?” when he picked up. “Save me! I’m bring chased! Jeno!” I was practically wailing with exclamation marks at this point. His breathing disappeared instantly after that. I realised that he hung up, only making my eyes protuberant as ever as my mouth gaped open so wide at the audacity of Jeno.

I turned my head back, the screaming of the guys never stopping this entire time. “How’s their stamina so good?!” I thought to myself, not wanting to look back again and continue running ahead at full speed. After who knows how long, I finally saw the Science department coming into my view. I flashed the widest smile on my face as I made a run for it.

I was a few metres away when I was suddenly being pulled by an unknown force, pushing me against the wall while the shrieks of the guys got muffled and disappeared as they continued running in the same direction. I was panting heavily, desperately gasping for air as if all the air around me had been sucked away for my lungs to grasp. I took me awhile to get my mind in the current situation since I was overly tired from the ruckus I had just gone through.

I swallowed once I got my breathing to the regular. Looking over my shoulders, someone was holding them, firmly yet lightly as well. It felt protective yet gentle when made contact with my skin. My eyes ever so slowly trailed from the hand that gripped my shoulders, to their arm that I realised was extremely veiny and buffed, to their broad shoulders which length was much longer than mine, making it feel as if I was being trapped with their body loomed over me.

I tilted my head up, Jeno’s face and body inches away from mine. Our eyes met, and it locked, firm and secured. Like a struck of lightning, his touch had sent an electric shock throughout my whole body, specifically at our point of contact till it stung and burn, but in a good way. Jeno’s breathing brushed across the skin on my face which only made me stand there in his grip, frozen as ice with my chest clenching tighter and tighter due to the sudden wave of emotions I was feeling.

“They’re gone.” Jeno whispered, his eyes peered to the side, checking if the coast was clear yet he never seemed to remove his grip off me, let alone doing anything about the close proximity between us. Silence circled in the air for a brief moment till Jeno pushed himself away from me lightly. “Heard from the members that they suddenly saw you running around like some mad woman. Apparently you called and I had to run all over the place to catch you at the right time.”

I eyed Jeno head to toe. He looked flawless. He seemed to have dressed up fancier today. A pink blazer that went perfectly well with his blue hair, white dress pants, and black shoes, and even a black beret to tie the look. I noticed how he had his botton up opened three bottons down again, it seemed to be a style of his, which intentional or not, drew me in real quick.

“I was running around so that I’d waste time and not have to attend class.” I said with such pride, wanting to toy around with Jeno for the fun for it. Jeno blinked his eyes twice, corner of his lip lifting up. It wasn’t a smirk, but a look of much disbelief and amused in one. Jeno took a step back, effortlessly running a hand through his fluffy hair.

“I wasted thirty minutes of my time chasing you around to save your ass and you’re telling me it’s for fun and games?” He narrowed his eyes down on me, fear washed over me like a huge wave as his stare from before was now filled with much anger and annoyance. In a split second, he had his grip on my wrist, suddenly dragging me into the Science department and to our lecture hall.

Jeno burst the door wide open, everyone’s heads turning to the door instantly as the sound of the slamming echoed across the silent hall. “It’s rare to see you late Jeno. It’s your first time actually.” Jeno still had his hand around my wrist, releasing his tight grip ever so slightly to let my blood run though again. He glanced down to his shirt, adjusting it with his free hand while for a split second he looked at our hands, but was quick to regain himself.

“We had a little trouble.” Jeno downshifted his head in greeting and took us up to the back of the hall, eyes glued to us as I felt it behind my back, suppressing the urge to turn around and go, “Stop being weirded out for God’s sake!” Jeno gripped my wrist tighter, as if he felt my irritation through his touch. We sat down next to each other, the professor continuing after far too long of a silence.

“You’re getting me gummy bears for what you did today.” Jeno whispered in a coarse tone, his throat sounding dry. I giggled and nodded my head, taking out my materials while he did the same. “Cute.” Jeno stopped his actions, turning his head slowly while I continued. “Why?”

“Just...” I wandered, thinking about how to come up with an excuse to something I accidentally let out. But who am I kidding? I’m not one to hide my feelings anyway. “I just think it’s cute that you have a huge love for gummies and jellies. Like a kid.” I shrugged and leaned back in my seat, wanting to focus on my professor but couldn’t shake the fact of how I could clearly see Jeno holding his stare on me in my peripheral decision for a long minute before adverting his eyes down the hall.

Jeno looked down at his phone, the confirmation of the transfer being made. It was a huge sum of money that could last him ages. To be honest, he felt that it wasn’t hard taking care of her at all. Her mother made it sound a hundred times worst. But she seemed fine and genuinely normal around Jeno, just the fact that she liked to joke around and slack. With Jeno’s light push, she could immediately spring back into action.

However, he couldn’t help but think that what he’s doing was wrong. Jeno was forming a relationship with her for the sole purpose of getting money. Worst part, she didn’t even knew about the deal he had with her mother. It was to be kept a secret. And Jeno didn’t like it, he felt the guilt building up inside him each time they met up, having to gather up courage to face her. To top it all off, the guilt only grew larger till it became a huge monster the moment he realised that he was falling for her.

For the end of our semester, we had to do a project. And unfortunately for me, or maybe not, it was a group project. After class ended, I was about to sprint up to Jeno, who was sitting at the very front today to be more attentive about the briefing for the project, every single girl in the hall went up and surrounded him as if they were swallowing him whole.

“Let me be your partner, Jeno!” “I’ll do the project well with you!” “I’m your best bet to scoring!”

I almost had a migraine constantly hearing their shrieks and screaming of the girls trying to get Jeno’s attention. Meanwhile, he forced a smile on his face, it was obvious that he was being suffocated and was desperate to teleport himself out of the hall. I couldn’t help but let out a subtle giggle, watching him suffer as I felt the energy of his blood boiling like hot air could burst from his ear any moment, but he was able to keep a neutral face the whole time. He knew how to manage his anger.

I watched the chaos, sighing to myself in a somewhat satisfactory manner. Jeno pushed through the crowd, trying his hardest to squeeze his way through. He turned around and lifted both his hands up in the air like he was being arrested. All the girls grew silent instantly at his action. “Sorry but I’m doing this myself.” Jeno declared out loud. He made eye contact with me, causing me to lean back and pointing a finger to myself to check if he was actually motioning at me. He jerked his head to the door, signaling me to exit.

Jeno walked out and the silence among the group of girls suddenly became inaudible murmurs and whispering their heads off. I clicked my tongue, floating like a balloon out of the lecture hall after.

“Everyone’s so desperate for you.” I said when I caught up to Jeno who was taking slow steps. “Ut was fun watching you suffer there. I could tell you were about to burst at any second.” I laughed out loud, putting my humour right up Jeno’s face. “Are you working with anyone for the project?” Jeno questioned me.

I kept a straight and boring expression. “Don’t feel like working with anyone.” I gaped my mouth open, a sudden idea popping up as my face slowly turned to a mischievous expression with the smile of the cheshire cat. “Do you perhaps want to-” 

“I’m not working with you because I know you well enough to know that you’ll make me do majority of the work. Even if I did work with you, you know me well enough to know that I’ll force you to do your work. Actually that applies to both you wanting and not wanting to work with me-”

“You didn’t even let me finish my sentence!” I growled with exasperation. Jeno’s face softened and turned kind, a look I rarely see on him. “Oh then what is it?” I kept silent for a moment. “want to work with me for the project...?” I uttered, it was barely audible. Jeno breathed out a chuckle. “Nice try. I’ll be supervising to make sure you’re on task anyways. It’s a shame I have to deal with your ass almost everyday.” I puckered my lips in question, eyebrows furrowed till it knitted together. “Why do you have to take care of me? Like why was I any of your business in the first place?”

Jeno kept a straight face, sudden anxiousness triggered in him as she asked the question. He wished he could tell her everything, but he knew far too well the consequences if it, and jeopardizing whatever relationship they had would never be an option. “Because I’m the president? I have to take care of new students, you know.” I questioning face grew back to my bored one, puffing my cheeks and blowing the air out, flippantly.  “Whatever.” I replied quickly as we went our separate ways after making a decision to meet someday at the student council’s office to start on our project.

Weeks past, and though I dreaded doing the project in the first place, I was shocked at how much I completed. However, with Jeno being extremely particular about my work so that I’d do well, I had to write up a proposal on my overall project for him. On a Saturday night. I didn’t know what came over me, but I had the feeling of wanting to get drunk. The work I did for the past weeks had led to me having constant mental breakdown, whining to myself just when could I get my break. And again, with Jeno having an invisible knife to my throat to make sure I did my work, break time seemed to never be in my to-do list.

I took a trip back home to steal a bottle of wine. Back at the dorm, I looked at the time. It was too early to get drunk, but I barely cared about that at all, opening the wine bottle and pouring it into the one wine glass I had. I didn’t use it to drink wine, but rather other sweet drinks and water for the sole purpose of wanting to feel fancy and have the timiest bit of class in this rundown dorm. I sat at my laptop, the white blank space staring at me while I stared back, slowly bringing the glass up to my lips to take a sip. I gulped it down, sighing in satisfaction. I began to write my proposal, thinking I’d be able to finish and send it to Jeno before I got drunk off the wine. How dumb was I to think my body could even do that?

It was late at night. Jeno in his dorm while trying to fix up and improve bits and pieces of his presentation for thr project. He had completed it long ago to be honest, he just needed to add a few things to turn it up a notch in terms of quality. Suddenly, on the bottom right corner of his screen popped up an email notification from her, the title being “A very well planned out proposal.” Jeno laughed for a moment, finger to his lip with his eyebrows raised. He felt the sarcasm through the words.

Grabbing a hold of his mouse, he brought the cursor over to the notification to open it, which led him to Google Docs where she typed out the proposal. Jeno sat up straight as a way to wake his mind up from the tired night he’s had up till now and began reading. He scanned his eyes over the paragraphs and taking barely seconds to expertly analyse them. It had been good so far, till it got to the last few paragraphs. Jeno noticed how some words had gone distorted, it seemed like she was typing gibberish, typing in a lazy and careless manner. Jeno could make out a few words, but the rest was far from recognisable. Then came the last paragraph, which shocked him the most.

HEsyu njEmo! i fELt dlike assduddely sddayubg thajis bjjfut weoek youyre veiry hot!! losike smkoingf baiiyy i likele yuori a hmklott!!! buit i knbow youre onkly beving kind to nr cauyse touyre onldjyy doiubg yourh jobbv as jhe phresibdrnt :$(((

Jeno squinted his eyes while looking at it. It can’t be what he thought it could be, right? Was he being delusional? Was he making up the meaning of the words to what he hoped to be? Jeno noticed his heart suddenly racing at a rapid pace, eyes reading it over and over again to come up with any other possible meaning behind it to deny his conclusion.

Though, after long thought, Jeno unconsciously had a smile on his face, his head tilting down to the table for a moment before looking up at the screen, his smile pursing his lips together tightly while shaking his head. “Cute.” Jeno whispered, letting out a long sigh before going back to the top of the proposal to add in his comments.

I went to our usual meetup spot. Luckily it was hours into the day, and I had time to recover from my hangover. I shocked myself this morning as I saw the bottle of wine fully empty, down to the last drop. How was I even capable of that? Whatever it was, I didn’t remember a single thing that happened last night. I assured myself that I didn’t do anything stupid since I woke up in bed, as per usual, just with a terrible headache with the room being the same as when I stepped in.

I swung open the door, lazily sliding my bag off my shoulder and to the table, pushing it aside while Jeno had his eyes on his laptop. “How’s my proposal?” Jeno shot his eyes up. “Did you not bother reading over once you were done?” Jeno questioned in a low, intimidating voice as if he could pounce on you at any second.

I sucked in my lips, a sound coming out when I placed my lips back to its normal position as I shook my head slowly with inability to show even the slightest confidence. I couldn’t be arrogant anymore around Jeno. He had a power over me that I never knew anyone could have. “Uh no?” Jeno hummed casually, leaning back into his seat nonchalantly, something about his light attitude making me scared as I began to think over what I had done wrong with my proposal.

“So you didn’t know what you did to it?” Jeno asked again, the interrogation feeling nestled in me as unknown fear piled up in me. I raised my shoulders questionably. “What’s wrong with it?!” I groaned out, tired of having him question me while I worried my ass off. “I added comments to it. Some things I added can help your presentation next week so make sure to go over it.” Jeno rose form his seat, gathering uo everything on the table and placing it in his bag. He casually slug it over one shoulder, walking away. Before he left however, he turned around and said, “Your last paragraph was cute by the way.”

Upon the door being closed, I instantly took out my laptop from my bag frantically, opening up the proposal that had Jeno’s notes on it. I scrolled all the way down till the last paragraph, wanting to faint as the sight of the red words below it and whatever nonsense I had typed out while I was drunk. “Please submit a more professional write up next time. Don’t be stupid to drink while you’re doing work.” I read over his words. I shrieked, the kind that was inaudible as I scrunched my hair up while balling fists into my hair. I shook my body around, embarrassment being the only feeling in my mind at that moment, as well as the rest of the night ahead.

It finally came to presentation day. And as expected, Jeno was chosen to come up first. He set up his slides, turning his head to it to make sure it was being shown clearly before looking back to his audience. His posture was upright and firm, confidence being dominated in him as he began presenting. Sure, I was listening to what he’s been talking about, but I was more so focused on Jeno himself. The way he expertly articulated his movements and words imbued with much passion. It’s as if he’s done it for years, like a high knowledged ornator. There was of course his beauty to admire in the midst of it all as well.

“_____. Why don’t you go?” The professor turned his upper body to me, the students still clapping loudly, and screams mostly coming from the girls while Jeno took his seat. I stood up, making my way down. The hall suddenly got pin drop silent. The whole time I presented, my eyes felt the urge to always glance to Jeno. Though I thought he’d have a serious look on his face, it was more of a soft and gentle one, a look that gave me reassure to push on. It warmed my heart and gave me a confidence boost almost instantly each time I looked to him.

“You did good.” Jeno admitted, a wide smile forming on his lips. I smiled back. “You did way better. I loved yours a lot.” I complimented, I was almost skipping due to how pumped up I felt after class. “Mm do you mean my presentation or me?” Jeno looked down on me and I looked back, eyes widened at his sudden comment. Jeno laughed it off, waving a lazy hand in my face. “Forget I said anything.”

Surprisingly, Jeno agreed to head out to a candy shop to congratulate ourselves for the hardwork we’ve done. And must I say, Jeno completely lit up. He was bright, bubbly, his subtle humor making me like him more and more. I couldn’t shake the face that we were hanging out like this, like we weren’t stuck in a box where Jeno was all stone and harsh on me. He radiated an energy that no one would have thoughg even existed. Turns out I just had to talk to him for it to show. And gummy bears.

Jeno and I were walkign down the same path on our way back. However, Jeno informed me that he had somewhere to be. I didn’t bother asking where, simply letting out a, “Wherever you’re going, don’t be out for too long!” Jeno flashed an eye smile and waved with an adorably low laugh, nodding his head. I walked away, but I noticed how Jeno was simply standing there, as if waiting for someone. He said he needed to go somewhere. Was he taking a cab or something?

I didn’t know why but curious came flooding my mind. I didn’t know how I suddenly got this intrigued by what he does off campus and whatever he’s doing outside of our friendship. As a person who liked him, it wasn’t wrong to be curious, right? Luckily, I wasn’t far off when I walked away so I turned a corner to hid myself there. Jeno waited there for at least fifteen minutes, my legs growing numb from having myself glued to the wall. Just when I wanted to walk away, a person came walking up to him, which he responded with a raise of his hand in greeting. Specifically it was a woman. My eyes almost fell out of their sockets the moment I realised who it was. What was my mother doing with Jeno?

I leaned in, my ear hoping to pick up every single word and my eyes looking at their every action. “A bonus. You’ve been doing well. You’re exceptional indeed.” My mother held out a large bag that looked extremely heavy. Jeno had one hand in his pocket, using his free hand to take it. He tilted his head down. “What’s with the physical cash? You always did online transfers.” Cash? Online transfers? What were they doing? Billions of questions flashed in my mind, I couldn’t be hearing this correctly. Were they dealing on something? Underground business I know nothing about?

“I’m suprised you’re able to hold her down for a time longer than I have seen her stay in one school. Whatever did you do to have her tamed?” Jeno chuckled, glancing down to the feet before meeting my mother’s eyes again. “Asserted dominance. Simple. Though I’ve always been like that, just needed to step up a little and showed her who’s boss.” Jeno folded his arm, shoulders relaxed and talking far too casually.

I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. Who else could they be talking about but me? Was Jeno being paid to be with me? Is that why he’s been giving me so much attention, so much care all this time. It was all for money... He did it for the money. “Also, I’ve confirmed a spot for you in the University. Just like you wanted.” My mother said. I saw how Jeno flashed a smile. My anger was boiling my blood to the highest of temperatures to even analyse and dig deeper into his actions. All I cared about was the fact that everything was a lie. From the moment I met him. It was all a show.

We were at the park, cold wind brushing against our exposed skin as the night gets itself comfortable, the stars beginning to shine and twinkle over the black canvas of the sky. I looked down from it, looking to Jeno who had his head cozily on my lap. I brushed my fingers through his hair gently, an action I’ve been doing for hours now.

Our relationship didn’t have a definite label on it. We didn’t know who we were. We let the waters flow, taking us to whichever direction it wanted. It just so happened that our feelings for each other sprouted naturally to the point where we didn’t have to say it out loud. Gradual actions of affection began and we simply liked that what we had was unsaid. It was easy, no trouble, no harm whatsoever.

“Jeno.” I whispered. Jeno fluttered his eyes open. He told me how he couldn’t help but fall asleep at my touch. “What would you do if I disappeared the next day?” I questioned, trying my hardest to make it less vague then it already was, though it failed, Jeno giving a look quizzically. “I’d be too sad to even function.” Jeno replied after a long pause of silence. And at the back of my mind, I couldn’t help but think Is what you’re saying even true? I kept questioning myself about his every action, every sign of love and care he showed. What happened that day months ago was still as clear as day in my memory, which only made me doubt Jeno’s feelings for me everyday.

“Would you really?” I asked again, this time looking at him right in his eyes, prying myself into his heart and soul through them to find that slither of truth glistening under. Jeno pouted, blinking his eyes like a lost puppy. “Of course. Why would you even ask that in the first place?” I mentally replied though I gave him silence as a response, “Because I’ll be leaving your fake ass soon.”

I rummaged through the cards in my parent’s room, finding desperately for a credit card I could use. After retrieving one, I went to my room, taking out a suitcase from under my bed and immediately started packing. I shoved everything I could think of bringing off the top of my head. If I didn’t have something, I could simply buy it at London. All I wanted was to get out of this country. Out of this life, out of Jeno’s life. I couldn’t stand bring treated like some object in a deal of responsibility.

I made my way to the airport in a cab. While I was on the road, I called the only person I knew who lived in London. “Taeyong, I’m moving to London. Free up your apartment because I’ll staying with you.” “Wait what? Hey-” I ended the call before he could even finish. I looked out the window. No regrets, no guilt was holding down my heart. It felt weird at first. But now I knew that the reason why I felt this way was because of the fact I had given Jeno all my love. Whether his was fake or not, I’ve given my whole share of the relationship.

Jeno was laying on his bed when the woman’s number suddenly popped up on his phone screen. Curious at the sudden call, he instantly picked it up. “What?” He asked in an unintentionally rude manner. “_____. She’s going to the airport. Our maid just informed us. I don’t know where she’s going, but please stop her.” She sounded frantic, anxious. Jeno instantly sprung up from his bed and rushed out his dorm, planning to steal Ten’s motorbike to rush his way to the airport.

Jeno got off the motorbike after speeding through so many cars and having the constant urge to go over the speed limit just so he could reach there faster. He didn’t knew where she was, but he was determined to find her. And most of all, hoped that she has yet to fly.

Jeno kept his eyes wide open, scanning through the large area constantly as he tried to find where she was. He ran a hand through his hair in frustration. It was all to sudden. Why did she decide to go abroad without letting him know? Of all people but him? He understood if she didn’t inform her parents, but Jeno was the only person she said she trusted the most. She couldn’t be leaving out of nowhere. It took him seconds to spot her in the busy area. He ran up to her, seeing how she had a large luggage on her side while she leaned against it casually and having her passport in her hand. “_____! Where are you going?!” Jeno shouted, gripping her wrist and turning her around.

I flinched at the sudden contact, hearing Jeno’s voice right behind me and he spun me around to face him. How did he even know I was here? Ah of course, my mother somehow knew though I wanted to make my leave as discreet as possible. I removed myself out of Jeno’s grasp, wincing at how tight he was holding my wrist. “You don’t need to know where.” I simply answered, but he shook his head furiously. “Tell me why!” Jeno pleaded. I saw the look in his eyes, the look of fear and pain while he got a hold of my wrist again. I let go. “Is my mother going to pay you more if you stopped me from leaving?”

I walked past him, seeing the time to board my flight blinking and signaling the people to get moving. I turned around after walking a far distance, flicking up my passport and tilting my head. I noticed how Jeno wanted to move, take a step towards me but had something in him that held him back, like he was unwillingly rooted to the ground. From a far distance I could tell Jeno’s pupils dilated at the sight of me taking steps back and growing smaller out of his view.

“Ciao.” I mouthed before turning away relentlessly There’s no turning back, was all i thought. With the money I had, I could go anywhere in the world as I pleased, anywhere that would get me away from this place and the person who broke my heart. I did say I didn’t feel anything, but as I went to board the plane, not bothering to turn back and take one last look at Jeno, the tears came out without a second thought. I tried my hardest to keep myself together. But right when we took flight, it came to my senses of what I was doing.

It took awhile to realise that she was gone, with Jeno being in a trance while she left. She was out of his sight, and he’ll never know for how long. After the day she went, Jeno was broken. So broken, that he couldn’t do anything. He holed himself in his room for days on end, not having a single energy to lift himself out of bed. He knew it from the start, this situation being inevitable. He didn’t think that she would mean this much to him the moment he accepted the deal. He kept telling himself that it wasn’t his fault, that he didn’t expect their relationship to grow and mean so much. But he couldn’t believe himself, denying it everytime he thought about it.

“For how long are you going to keep talking to me about this?”

Taeyong ran a frustrated hand through his hair, my eyes boring at him as he paced back and forth in front of me in the living room. I couldn’t help but wonder just how long he wanted to keep this up.

“Two years. Two damn years you’ve been staying here in London.” He turned a sharp ninty degrees to face me, his body leaning forward slightly. “Don’t get me wrong I like that you’re here but you have a whole life that you left behind. On an impromptu decision might I add.” I stared at him blankly, showing my careless attitude by sinking into the couch and folding my arms with placing one leg over the other. “I don’t care. I’m living well here so I don’t see why I have to go back.”

“You told me about Jeno. Do you not miss him at all?” That question got me to look down as it sunk into my mind, thoughts about it began to surface. Taeyong probably noticed the thoughtful look on my face, adding on with, “Think about it. He made that simple deal at first without knowing his relationship with you would expand so much more from when it first started. Did you not bother to think about what went through his mind when you left so unexpectedly? From what you told me, he certainly loves you. Not sure if he still does though, being real here.” Taeyong shrugged flippantly, not giving a care to shoot his words right at my heart and being real with me.

“But he didn’t stop the deal even when he developed feelings for me. What does that show?” Though I retorted back, I felt it. Taeyong’s words that I mulled over firing at me, even with the bulletproof vest that I had on for the two years, the bullets went right through them, shooting me dead as I bleed and thought about all the memories I had with Jeno. It only now occured to me that I truly did miss him, I was simply pretending I didn’t and tried living my best life here in London, wanting to push away the fact that I’ve never had a better life than back there with Jeno. “You have to go back someday, _____.” Taeyong sat down next to me, placing a firm hand on my shoulder. “And talk to Jeno.”

I couldn’t believe that I was back here. It felt weird, somewhat out of place. But I also belonged here. Everything washed over me and crashed like a huge wave. I had always wished that I didn’t need to come back, but my heart was slowly growing its need for it, its need for Jeno, though I had been strong for the first few months away.

I gulped my nervousness down my throat, standing in front of what I assumed to be Jeno’s apartment since my mother was so kind to inform me where he lived after giving me an earful of leaving for two years and never informing me where. Weird how they never forced me back. I knew they were capable of it with their connections here in London. I guess they never bothered to reach out and find me.

I rang the doorbell, my heart slowly increasing its pace as it thumbed against my ribcage, begging to burst out. I took in deep breaths, waiting patiently while I hoped for Jeno to be at the other side. After about close to a minute, the door creaked open, Jeno was standing in front of me. I forced myself to look him in the eyes as I inspected him. He didn’t change at all. Surprisingly, the hair colour was kept the same. The light blue that made me remember the first time he walked into class with it, capturing all the light and attention of the hall. He still had that figure of someone who worked out often, a nice physique. I didn’t take me long to notice that physically, nothing has changed.

“Um, I know this is unexpected. I’m sorry for leaving unexpectedly. I’m sorry for leaving without giving you any explanation whatsoever. I’m sorry-” I wanted to continue, wanting to let it all out right then and there till Jeno pulled me into a hug by the waist, bringing both hands up to wrap them tightly around my shoulder, his head digging into the crook of my neck as I felt him inhale against my skin, his breath brushing over it after. It took me awhile to process, gradually bringing my arms up to hug his torso, pulling ourselved closer and letting ourselves fall into each other’s embrace.

“Please, let me talk.” Jeno whispered to me. He kept a long silence after, allowing us to admire this moment. Perhaps he couldn’t believe that I was here, the fact that I left and came up unexpectedly, out of the blue. I felt the mixed emotions in his words. “I’m sorry for making that deal with your mother. I thought it was something I’d do for the sake of the money. I know you felt hurt at the fact that I did it behind your back. But I did it for you. I took care of you for your own good. I kept receiving the money, but it slowly grew meaningless when I began to like you.” Jeno rubbed his nose against my neck, though it felt ticklish, I kept my calm, wanting to focus on his words.

I pulled away, my hands still around his torso but allowing a gap between our bodies. I looked up to him, a frown forming on my face. The tears became to well up upon the sudden emotional roller coaster ride. My eyes trailed from his eyes, and gradually down to his lips after looking at every inch of his face, admiring them greatly as I began to remember why I fell for him in the first place. With or without the money, my feelings for him had never changed, no matter how buried deep into my heart they were.

“I never said this before... And I’m sorry for telling you now...” I reached up to meet his face, having to tiptoe my way up. Jeno giggled softly at my action, dipping his head down to save me from his struggle. I pouted, flicking my eyes from his one eye to the other. I then moved to his lips, smooth and glossy. It was obvious he wore chapstick.

“But I love you, Lee Jeno. I didn’t feel the need to say it back then, we were simply showing it with our affections. But I really do love you. It’s a bit too late to say it so I’m sorry. If you’ve ever lost feeling for me even the slightest bit. But I promise my love is still true and pure, no matter what you did.” I quietly whisper, my face so close to him that my lips were hovering over his, just barely touching and urging our lips to connect.

Just like that, our lips touched, a kiss was made. His lips fit perfectly to mine, like the world made it that way. Suddenly, everything came into focus. The invisible stars aligned. Everything felt so right, so perfect, with him holding me close. Jeno began to kiss me, as slow as ever and with much care and love. We closed our eyes, as if never wanting to leave this. I didn’t know how long we were standing there, lips never wanting to part. But sooner or later we did, me having to pull away first.

“My love for you never changed either. I waited, and I missed you too much to forget what we had.” Jeno breathed out, his chest going up and down against mine as he breathed heavily. I giggled, looking down in embarrassment as my cheeks to began to blush an obvious pink. “That was our first kiss.”

Jeno arched a brow quizzically. “Was it? It felt like we’ve been doing it forever.”

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[emmyhem]

good stupid (l.r.h)

a/n: hi again! this is a short and sweet luke x student fem!reader imagine, and my first time posting smut,, i’m planning on posting some angsty stuff pretty soon sooo i wanted to have something pretty fluffy up but as i wrote it became clear to me that smut would fit well. so with all that being said, i hope you enjoy - emmy <33 (p.s, requests are still open but i am working on quite a few already and they take me slightly longer to write than my own pieces because i want to be sure i’m doing them justice. but all requests are extremely appreciated as well as any feedback on my writing. and i’m always up to chat, if you ever have something on your mind, no matter how random :)) 

pairing: luke hemmings x student fem!reader 

summary: an innocent but important secret sparks a competitiveness between you and your boyfriend, but it may end in both of your favor. 

warnings: smut, oral sex (female receiving), cursing, but mainly just fluffy romantic sex 

word count: 2.2k

Luke’s head was in your lap as you read from your textbook intently. Your eyebrows were tugged together and your lips pouted in concentration. 

“You’re pretty.” he hummed, a sweet grin on his face. 

You glanced down, scrunching your nose in fondness. 

“You too.” you responded, poking his cheek.

“Stop, I’m blushing.” he joked, hiding his face behind his hands.

You laughed before turning your attention back to your studies, but Luke’s eyes remained glued to you only breaking contact occasionally to blink. You could feel his eyes on you, making it extremely hard to focus.

“Luke.” you scolded. 

“What?” he whined. 

“You gotta stop staring. I'm trying to study bub.”

“No can do, lovie. M’studying too.” he protested. 

“And what are you studying?” you questioned. 

“You.” he said matter of factly. “Happens to be my favorite subject.” 

You pressed your lips together tightly to avoid smiling like an idiot. The two months you’d spent with Luke had been the best of your life, for the first time you felt like things were just right. It was as if you had been made for him and you kept finding yourself having to actively avoid blurting out the big L word. It was like it was always at the tip of your tongue threatening release, any time he would compliment you, or hug you tighter than normal, and it was especially hard when he kept looking at you like you hung the stars in the sky. 

So caught up in your lovestruck haze, you hadn’t noticed that you had sat your book down next to you on the couch and were staring off into space.

Luke sat up and pulled you to his chest.

“What’s going on in that pretty little head of yours?” he poked, pressing a swift kiss to the top of your hairline. 

“Just thinking.” you mumbled into his shoulder. 

“Bout what? You gotta tell me I’m trying for an A in y/n studies.” 

You laughed while shaking your head. 

“I’m thinking about saying something stupid.” you said timidly, pulling out of Luke’s embrace to look him in the eyes. 

“Good stupid or bad stupid?” 

“M’not quite sure.” you answered, moving back into Luke’s arms. 

His eyes flashed with mischief as he leaned away from you.

“I’ll give you a kiss if ya tell me.” 

“I can get one of those whenever I want.” you replied, chasing his lips with your own. 

“Nah, I think I’ll hold out for a while, can’t have you keeping secrets.” 

You laughed, knowing how needy your boyfriend could get, “We’ll see how long that lasts.” 

“Heyyy,” he drawled out. “No laughing, baby I’m serious. You won’t be getting any action till you spill.” 

You just pretended to zip your lips shut and throw away the key in response before continuing your work.  He would give in within the hour, you were sure of it. 

This has been the longest 3 days of your life. You had no idea when kissing Luke had become such a big part of your everyday routine but it was becoming abundantly clear to you that it was. 

Like this morning, when your alarm woke you up for class and you rolled over to kiss him without even thinking about it. You were centimeters away from making contact before a smile broke on Luke’s face and he rolled over to mumble, 

“No kisses for you.” before closing his eyes once again. 

Or when you dropped off lunch for the guys at the studio, you had been expecting at least a peck to express his gratitude for your favor, but all you got was a quick kiss on the back of your hand and a sly, 

“Thank you, baby.” 

Tonight you were determined, and  there was no way in hell you would be the one to give in. You were cooking when he got home, freshly showered and wearing only one of  his favorite shirts. Luke heard you before he saw you, humming to ABBA from the kitchen, he chuckled to himself  before turning the corner. 

“Hi baby.” you greeted, spinning on your heel while you sucked a bit of pasta sauce off your finger. 

Luke groaned at the sight of you before sauntering over and wrapping his arms around your waist as you stirred your cooking pasta. 

“You are making this extremely hard for me.” he hissed in your ear. Emphasis on the hard as he pressed himself against your back. 

You squeezed your thighs together at the feeling but held your composure as you spun to face him. 

“I dunno what you're talking about, Lu.” 

“Tell me your secret and we can go upstairs.” he whined, tugging you away from the stove.

“And let my dinner get cold?” you teased, waving a disapproving  finger. 

As you finished cooking Luke sat at the table, his eyes following your every move. 

“Food’s ready.” you announced as you pulled two plates from the cabinet. 

When no response came you looked in his direction. He nodded and beckoned you forward with the curl of two fingers. You took a seat on his lap and wrapped your arms around his neck.

“What’s a matter, baby? Aren’t you hungry?” you cooed in his ear. 

Luke clenched his jaw and ran a finger along your thigh, “I’m begging you to fess up. You’re looking way too pretty not to kiss and I don’t like to give in.” 

“Me neither” you countered, your forehead pressed against his. 

“Baby,” he whined. 

“You really wanna know?” you said, your feet carrying you back to the counter as you got an unexpected surge of confidence. 

“You have no idea.” he sighed from behind you. “Please put us both out of our misery, hm?” 

“I love you.” you admitted, holding your breath as you stared at the marble countertop in front of you. 

You could hear Luke stand up and felt his breath on the back of your neck within a second. 

“That’s my secret.” you continued.

His hands ran down your sides before settling firmly on your hips, which he used as leverage to spin you in his direction. You kept your eyes to the floor once facing him but he was quick to change that, using his thumb and pointer to tilt your chin up. You looked up through your lashes to meet his eyes. 

“And I love you more.” he returned. And there he went again with that look, as if you were his favorite thing in the entire universe. 

You let out a sigh of relief, one that was cut short by Luke’s lips moving urgently against your own. You both seemed to melt into each other as his tongue worked its way into your mouth. He was quick to pick you up and set you on the counter, this way he wouldn’t strain his neck to kiss you. The kiss was breathy, needy, and exactly what your body had been craving for the past three torturous days. 

“We are never ever doing that again.” he spoke into your mouth between kisses. 

“Mhm.” you agreed as his hands groped at your thighs, pushing his shirt that you had on up in the process. 

“Wrap your legs around me.” he instructed as you pulled away to breath. 

“Lu, dinner.” you protested. 

“I know, lovie. Later, I promise but right now m’hungry for something else and I can’t wait any longer.” 

“Okay,” you agreed breathlessly, wrapping your legs around him tightly as he carried you into the bedroom. 

Once in the bedroom he laid you out on the bed muttering out broken praises as he kissed down your neck. 

“Hardest three days of my life.” he admitted as his hands slid under your shirt. 

His palms were warm and rough on your skin and the only response you could muster was a soft whimper.  

Once he found his way to your nipples you were a moaning mess beneath him. 

“Off” you sighed, sitting up a bit so he could remove the shirt, leaving you completely bare. 

He ran a finger down your stomach as he spoke, “So pretty for me, angel.” 

You shuddered at his words feeling more needy by the second. 

“Lu, please.” 

“Feeling eager, baby? Me too. But I just wanna enjoy the girl I love for a bit.” he continued, as he settled between your legs. 

Your heart skipped a beat at the word love, and you couldn’t help the dopey smile that appeared on your face. 

He began peppering light kisses on your thighs each one slightly closer to where you needed him most. You started to squirm impatiently causing him to pull away and hover over your face, 

“I love you.” he declared. 

“I love you too.” you affirmed, straining your neck leaning to kiss him. Once you pulled away he grinned before returning to his previous position. 

He wasted no more time before attaching his lips to your clit, working it furiously under his tongue. 

Your head immediately threw back in pleasure, and if it weren’t for Luke’s hands holding you down you were sure your hips would’ve bucked up. 

You were whimpering relentlessly as he hummed in content against you. 

“Taste’s so good, baby. Missed this so much.” 

You only mewled in response, feeling your first orgasm begin to creep up on you already. 

“Lu,” you moaned, your hands finding his hair and tugging lightly causing him to grunt. “M’close.” 

“Yea? Doing so good, wanna come for me, love?” he questioned, adding a finger as he continued the assault on your clit. 

“Y-yes” you stuttered out, your breath catching in your throat as you reached your climax. You shook under Luke’s hold as he worked you through your orgasm. 

As you recovered he nipped at your neck and left a trail of kisses up your jaw before finally reaching your lips. You kissed him sloppily still feeling hazy from the pleasure. 

“Gonna let me take you?” he cooed, continuing to pepper kisses all over your face. 

“Please.” you nodded. 

“Okay, baby. Lemme grab something.” he said before carrying himself over to his nightstand to retrieve a condom. 

Once he rolled the condom on and made his way back to you he rubbed his thumb on your hip as he lined himself up with your entrance. 

“Ready?” 

“Yea, Lu. Need you” you mewled. 

He began to press into you slowly, letting your body adjust to the stretch as he inched in. Once he was completely in, you clenched in pleasure at the sensation of being so completely full. This caused Luke to grunt loudly, 

“Fuck, so good for me, angel” he praised. “Lemme know when I can move. Okay, baby?”

You nodded quickly as you took your bottom lip in between your teeth. 

“Move, please.” you begged, desperate for friction. 

He started with slow thrusts, they were passionate and so filling you felt like you might actually burst. His thumb found your clit and began rubbing slow circles as he continued. 

“F-faster,” you stumbled over your words, the pleasure overwhelming you. “I need faster.” 

Luke was happy to comply, picking up the pace with each thrust. As he pounded into you harder he pressed further, his head nudging at your g-spot causing you to squeal, your fingers gripping at the sheets. 

“Is that the spot?” he questioned hitting it repeatedly, causing your brain to essentially go numb. The only active thought being, Luke. 

You physically couldn’t gather the strength or power to speak so instead you just nodded, your entire body falling slack as your second orgasm approached. 

“Gonna come for me again, baby? Show me how good I’m making you feel?” 

As if you weren’t already feeling enough, Luke chose this moment to attach his lips to your neck again sucking harshly at the spot he knew made you weak. 

“Fuck, baby.” he groaned, breaking away. “Can feel you clenching around me. Cum for me y/n, I know you can do it. C’mon gimme one more, wanna come with you.” 

You came undone around him as he hit your most sensitive spot over and over again. He followed immediately after, your name falling from his lips repeatedly during his release. 

So completely fucked out, you didn’t even notice when he pulled out, and tied off the condom before throwing it away and flopping down next to you on the bed. 

“How are you doing, my love.” he asked sweetly while pulling you to his chest.

You nodded into him and mumbled, “m’good, really good.” 

“I love you so much.” he spoke into your forehead before pressing a wet kiss on it. “How ‘bout I get ya all cleaned up and then warm us up some dinner to eat in bed?” he questioned, eyes studying your face. 

“Will you shower with me?” you asked timidly. 

“Well, I wasn’t planning on doing it alone.” he teased, lifting you up. 

As he sat on the edge of the tub, you on his lap, letting the shower run over his hand to ensure the water temperature was just right for you, you buried your face into his neck. 

“M’so glad I told you my secret.” 

“Me too.” he laughed. “Though, that whole no kissing thing was stupid.” 

“Good stupid.” you countered.

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