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#i really dont want to have to make a post that actually states this is a joke blog hes a 2d anime man how problematic can he get
girlhorse · 3 months
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been seeing. a lot of posts lately that r more than toeing the line between being anti-Israel gov & downright antisemitic 😷 but not sure what to do. like almost every one of these posts ive seen straight up has comments of support from very unsavory and disgusting white supremacists. like the amount of antisemitic memes ive seen shared on these posts and very alarming comments is making me feel a bit ill lol
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FOR LIKE. CONTEXT. idiot's guide is broken up into two arcs, arc 1 is... almost done i think. hopefully. there's still kind of a ways to go for arc 2
so essentially i'm thinking about, once i do finish writing and editing arc 1, starting to post those chapters on a once a week schedule. then if i haven't finished arc 2 by the time i run out, i'd take a break from posting until it does get finished. if it is finished by then i'll just continue posting lmaofjdsklfjd
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sundial-bee-scribbles · 9 months
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redraw of this thing
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camping-with-monsters · 7 months
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I MAKE VERY SILLY GOOFY ANIMATICS SOMETIMES.
Several months ago I created a nightcore version of “Nightmares Never End” and I haven’t been able to listen to the normal song since because I love the nightcore version so much oh my god
Anyways :)) The OCs in the first half are my own from my original story “Duck Duck Goose”, and the OCs in the second half belong to @pazam from her original story “My Little Angel” :) This might be a more oddly specific animatic but the imagery wouldn’t leave my head until I created it :))
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toastsnaffler · 7 months
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tried going to bed early bc ive just been sitting staring at the wall or my phone all afternoon but it's been 3 hours now and I can't stop crying. :(
#I dont even know why im so fucking sad. this last week has felt like getting hit by a train repeatedly for no reason whatsoever#and it fucking hurts so bad and i cant fix it because i dont know whats wrong!!!!!!#i think thsts why its been so hard sleeping lately like my brain is problem solving but theres nothing there to be solved#and i dont even have anyone to talk to about it and even if i did i wouldnt have anything to say bc i dont know im just fucking. sad#like yeah ive gotten upset abt other things but thats me projecting my mental state onto everything. theres no original cause#unless it really is just pms and some hormonal shit which is likely but kinda insane to think abt. like yeah my body has decided#to flood the entire fucking system with Kill That Egg™ for a straight week except its too effective and makes me want to kill myself also#but apparently not fucking effective enough to start my actual fucking period. yippee#i want a thousand year long hug and to cry rly snottily into someones shirt and then to fall asleep and wake up feeling rested#man. nothing makes me feel any different. exercising and sleeping and socialising and eating and showering and reading#and i can feel my interest in things trickling away like i havent been able to do a lot of shit i rly want to bc of this barrier#and ive been trying to make myself do some things regardless bc inactivity will just make it worse. but nothing works!!!!!!!#i dont even know anymore man. i do everything right and im still as depressed as i was like 8 years ago#and i know thats just the depressed brain talking like i know i dont constantly feel like this but its hard to see outside of it man#u spend ur whole life drowning but its ok bc sometimes u get ur head above the surface long enough to take a breath or whatever#insert overused mentally ill metaphor here etcetcetc#ok i think ive run out of things to say im gonna try sleep again. day 1 billion of making longass vent posts sorry everyone#gn#.vent
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toytulini · 11 months
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feels very strange to get podcast ads about how pride friendly orlando is rn what with the current political conditions of florida for very large swathes of the queer community
i mean i dont have any suggestions for like idk the marketing team of the orlando tourism board to do any better like i certainly wouldnt know how to advertise rn, thats a rough hand youre stuck with and i hope your shit ass transphobe fascist politicians drop dead.
just. wild to hear rn
#toy txt post#and like maybe it is a pride friendly area within florida but like the fact that im getting advertised it from a very different state#its just Feels Very Weird. its like the same energy as when companies started having normal ads again about having like#holiday gatherings and football parties in like 2021/2022? like no actually the unprecedented times are still upon us. your pandemic ads#were insufferable for sure like they felt very weird and stupid and patornizing and but you have somehow managed to Make It Worse#thats kinda how it feels like the same vibe. it was one thing before it was pride month and it was just like casually trying to convince me#to come to universal and disney but now its june so theyre talking about their Gay Days#and like it would almost certainly be very weird and uncomfortable if it was like listen we acknowledge the current guy we have#is going like full blown fascist with an intent on genociding queer and particularly trans ppl but like listen we installed this new ride#and we'd really like for it to pay for itself with ticket sales or whatever. idk just feels weird. i dont know if i have a suggestion for#the advertising board of tourism in orlando to do differently like i dont have a suggestion for them except to maybe get that fucker out of#office. and it probably feels less weird if ur like In The State or in another state with similar horrifying shit#its probably like well whatever and thats fair. i mean its not fair i hope all your transphobic fascist ass politicians drop dead and that#yall will be safe#anyway. just. very weird. anyway idk. @mouse if you kill desantis with no mercy just fucking destroy his ass#ill forgive u a little bit and consider hitting up your extremely expensive theme park if i have the funds. universal if u pitch in on#destorying that bastard ill consider visiting you again too. again if i have the funds. i wont go to the terf wizard section but i do want#to see the new hulk track 🥺#ppl of florida especially marginalized ppl of florida. you deserve so much fucking better than you got im so sorry#floridian govt makes me so mad for like the regular human reasons of. they suck for a lot of fucking people and also the very important and#unique ecosystems yall have down there but also for the personal selfish reasons of. florida seems like Really Cool if it didnt have#like#the fascists. and gun culture. id love the climate. well. on the Atlantic side. gulf too warm for me personally. so many creatures down#there. cool places and you got those Very themey theme parks and listen i would like disney to have less power (#(AFTER THEY DISEMBOWEL DESANTIS. I WANT THEM TO DESTROY HIM AND HIS CRONIES FIRST. PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF ANYTHING)#but like they did kinda go off with the Theming. i do love that. universal too BUT. not to derail this post into roller coasters but also#sorry that is a thing im incapablw of being normal about sorry UH universal also went tf off with the themeing and i Love it HOWEVER#i do with the coasters were more. visible. i cant speak for disney i only went once as a very small tiny child and i remember nothing#but i went to universal in high school like Right before they completely retracked hulk and the theming was incredible i was obsessed.#but there was no way to see most of the coasters without actually riding them which i did find very disappointing.
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bowtiestash · 1 year
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i’m going to try to be more active on tumblr because of the way twitter’s going, just a heads up
#im not sure if i will actually 'be more active' but ive been stayin off of twitter bc like#seein a lot of transphobic shit trend and also just .. the general Bad Direction twitter has been going thru#makes me just not want to use it as much#ive been off it for a bit and honestly i think its been workin somewhat well??#tumblr feels a lot more comfy tbh#it feels weird to just make random text posts now#also uh. extra random heads up but im gonna be postin fanart for random ass things#i feel like theyre random bc i havent really expressed interest on here but i did mention some of it on twitter#for example i have a hades fanart im working on#i also have some hermitcraft doodles which. might come out of left field but yeah#honestly i got slightly into traffic life series because of the fanart and a bit of hermitcraft because of the fanart#i feel like its kinda really out of left field for me but i did make mcyt art before#oh yeah since im rambling i just wanna mention. hermitcraft/life series fanart SLAP so hard. who gave the fanartists the right#thats why i got into it in the first place. i love browsing the fanart of them bc theyre so good#i feel like im more of a fan of the fanart more than the actual thing#i just feel like. my interests are so fuckin random. and they dont go together at all#we got... hades game (kinda) mp100 and then hermitcraft/life series like WHAT#i think the one thing they have in common is that theyve offered some great distraction for my shit brain when ive been going Through It#still coping a bit with my mental state and how things got there but im. gettin better i think#seriously its been a while since the bad stuff happened and yet im still. dealing with it. it SUCKS#i wanna make a new text tag but idk what it should be#ill figure it out later. i think
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snekdood · 1 year
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Ppl gotta understand that just bc you do x thing because you're mentally ill, doesnt mean your actions dont have the same effect if you weren't. Like if you've been manipulative to your friends, you cant get mad at them for not sympathizing entirely with you when you go on about how they dont accept you for your mentally ilness. Regardless of your reason, you were still manipualtive, you fucked with peoples trust. Theyre still gonna have trust issues about you even if its bc of whatever mental illness you have.
#im not saying its cool for them to abandon you but cmon. you have to consider sometimes other people and what they can handle#bc if you keep manipulating your friends or whatever theyre gonna get used to being manipulated and expect it from other people#whatever the case. people have limits. your friends have limits. im not saying theyre always justified. im not saying your friends are#never abliest. but they do have limits. and if you're yelling at them all the time about being perfect or whatever you cant exactly#be surprised when they dip out.#like for example. im a p aggressive and angry guy. clearly. if youve seen any of my posts.#ive always got something to rant about. and while im not quite as much like this irl its still a thing about me. im very very vocal about#whatever injustice i percieve happening to me or others lol. but i can understand why me being intense and angry and ready to throw hands#at the drop of a hat would make some people want to avoid me. i understand it makes some ppl feel scared and unsafe.#its not something i try to do. i dont try to make ppl i like feel unsafe. i try not to be that way around ppl w those kinds of issues#but im not gonna throw a fit and be like 'you guys are okay with bpd until i get really really angry and call you a cunt'#like... uh... yeah. i dont blame ppl like that for dropping me entirely if im getting angry all the time around them and it triggers them#and i dont seem to stop or be able to stop.#sure its not great. sure i dont want to be as aggressive and angry around anyone let alone ppl afraid of that sorta thing. but this is#the current state of my being. its something im working on. and i can understand why some ppl cant handle me right now as i am.#idk. just. shit like that man#another example. im hella hella HELLA bad at communicating via technology. unless you're in front of my face my mind just forgets we were#even talking sometimes. this naturally will cause issues. how am i gonna get upset at someone for being mad i stoped responding#in the middle of a conversation? sure i didnt mean it. this is purely unintentional. however that doesnt change the fact of my actions.#it doesnt change the fact that that person might feel unwanted. i can apologize day and night but until i actually try to be more attentive#of my phone this is just gonna keep happening yknow. how is it fair to get mad at other ppl for getting mad at you over that?
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munamania · 2 years
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it’s just i spend so much time sharing little things about myself in the hopes that it sparks a connection with people and also i guess that maybe sometimes people will think of me yk. to feel like i exist outside of my own head. i dont think this is a bad thing it’s just where im at it’s a natural want for connection and it like. works for me. and i also dont think it’s bad to have the friends i do that are like ‘surface level’ yk. i still appreciate them and love them. it’s just, this is where im at, desperately clawing in different spaces in my life to be known even tho it’s embarrassing lol. and it just sucks that i never had to try to with her. not only did we have this extremely insane chemistry right off the bat, she’s someone that in like every way has made it seem like she actively wants to know me. beyond just the polite and whatever kind of level. and it’s like, of course that feels absolutely amazing given ive been pining since day 1 but also i just like her a lot as a person. you know. and it all sucks and makes me wanna combust sometimes that things aren’t the way i’d like them to be between us of course lmfao but i also think she’s an incredible person and she’s managed to make me feel so safe and calm and simultaneously obviously fucking crazy and energized and whatever. u know. whatever my point is here im gonna be done now <3
#jk! it's like. she remembers shit abt me. not only these things that im basically handing to the world around me like hi hey please#think of me. she notices the stuff i dont make a point to point out. stuff that i say really offhandedly or to myself#she remembered what cup i was going to use our first time hanging out she remembered my posters even tho i only showed her my room for like#a second. shes looked up movies i mentioned she. in her also very drunken state. paid attention to the exact cup i was carrying around#that was actually just sweet and smart of her. when we left she was like Um hey. that's not the one u had lol#sometimes she references things i've said and i have to stop myself from going Oh ;-; on the spot#and early on we'd tease each other even though we. didnt really know each other. so it was over the most basic shit and that was#its own thing that felt all <33333 yk. stupid silly goofy#so now. shes not talking to me for whatever reason and i think lied abt why she didnt answer last weekend and it's weird#and it's like. yeah it sucks knowing they're still evidently goin strong. but also im like damn this person that i was prepared to#call a friend and really like. care about at this point. is acting like we're at square 1#and we're not close enough for me to Fully be like Yo dude wtf. but we're definitely beyond the point where it's like#oh this is someone i just hung out with once and we didnt rlly click so im just going to be polite but not engage#if that makes sense. yk.#so monday im gonna try to get some clarity on the whole thing but ig here's me lamenting rn#haha u thought u were getting just a regular non film girl vent post. sike#im not like breaking down over this i promise im just reflecting. and didnt want to get up for my journal. so here's this#film girl saga#long post
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fortunately-bi · 2 days
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...... If I went on a hiatus for who knows how long again would y'all hate me....... 👉👈
#i just spent like an hour writing and rewriting a post trying to explain myself amd its just so hard to put into words#im bored here but not in a ew not enough content for the dopamine hit shit#in like a every time i scroll through I dont smile I dont see anything that makes me happy at all i dont get a laugh or anything#its just mindless brain rotting scrolling nothing wasting my time hoping maybe ill see a new artist to follow or something#and every time its nothing#so much nothing taking up so much of my time and space in my life and i already dont have a lot of time to begin with#ive made some awesome friends here ive had lovers from here ive had people who are no longer on this earth from here who ill never forget#i dont think ive really enjoyed anything on here in 7 years#ive left before for a really long time i think like a year or more or something#and i wont be totally unreachable of people message me ill respond but im so sick of this stupid app taking up my life#and all i ever get out of it is getting mad or getting depressed over shit that really is t worth my mental state over#all i ever feel on here is that the world fuckin sucks and theres not even anything here to make hanging around worth it#im not new to this site making me suicidal for an abundance of reasons and im luckily in a spot where i wont actually hurt myself#its just ideation and intrusive thoughts but its a pattern i cant keep ignoring#also im old tumblr im old tumblr and i think i will always be old tumblr im just not catching on to new shit anymore#the fact im even saying anything about a hiatus should show how pld tumblr i am no one does this anymore lol#i just don't want to be here anymore i dont really want to be anywhere online anymore tbh#its always something and i cant mentally keep up with it anymore i have too much going on in my life#my wife is having cancer removed on Tuesday im a lead teacher who has to take care of i think 8 babies now#i have problems i have actual problems that need me and need me to be as there as i can be#i cant be spiraling over stuff online on top of real world problems im in no position to do anything about on top of personal life problems#that are drastically affecting my life at home and hurting my family and loved ones#i have a mass in my thyroid which is so big i choke to the point i stop breathing if I dont have my meds i throw up all day#i have to see a neurologist because at best i have a pinched nerve at worst im having seizures and i might have to move states again#i dont have it in me to come on here and see stuff that makes me upset for the chance i might see something i like#and i can unfollow people and whatever but I dont have the energy or time to sift through people i follow on here#if you want to talk in dms or asks or you want to send me posts pls by all means continue to do so thats fine#but i think i need to take the app out of my line of sight again for a bit and just be in the moment again same with twitter#anyways i love yall i promise i am safe and not in harms way im just stressed af and i have got to start cutting things out that#arent doing anything other then making me miserable
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drchucktingle · 4 months
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my masks
hey there buckaroos. due to all of the attention the TEXAS LIBRARY ASSOCIATION situation has gotten i am going to take a minute to talk about my personal way as an autistic buckaroo. im going to tell you about my masks.
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im doing this for a few reasons, some are good FUN reasons full of love and some are not so great. 
lets start with the GOOD STUFF. first of all, i am talking about this because speaking on my way can help other buckaroo feel more comfortable speaking on there own way, ESPECIALLY if they are good at ‘passing’ for neurotypical like chuck is. 
unfortunately the NOT SO GREAT reasons im talking about all this dang stuff are two fold. reason one: i have been put into a position of having to explain and justify my needs and boundaries by the TXLA. this is not something that i WANT to be taking up all of my time, but when large organizations do not make space for those who they have pledged to support, it puts us smaller buckaroos into position where were have to defend our existence. it is not plesent but it is necessary.
the second NOT SO GREAT reason is that ‘passing’ bisexual and autistic people like myself are ALWAYS just seconds from being gatekept from folks both outside and inside these communities. there will probably be a day on chucks deathbed where i take off my mask and say hello to this timeline (mostly so you can all see how handsome i am under here but I DIGRESS). i KNOW with absolute certainty (the same way other bi and autistic buckaroos are probably nodding along right now) that when that day comes i will STILL be accused of ‘not being real’ and ‘faking’ because i ‘dont look autistic’ and i have a beautiful ladybuck partner in sweet barbara.
ALL THAT IS TO SAY, i am taking a moment today to talk FOR THE RECORD about my neurodigence and my particular needs. hopefully i will not have to keep diving this deep every time an organization takes a discrimantory action against me, but i will also say this: at least it is a good fight on an important battlefield
anyway buds, here is the story of my way on the spectrum
when i was a young buckaroo i knew that my thought process was different. i could socialize easily, which is unique in contrast to many autistic buds (it is a spectrum after all), but my social ease was for an interesting reason. I ALWAYS KNEW WHAT OTHERS WERE ABOUT TO SAY. it was like a strange ‘human game’ where someone would say one thing and i would think ‘well you actually mean something else’ in a sort of logical way (this is why i later related to DATA from star trek so dang much). at first i remember thinking ‘well i am just NOT going to play along with this human game’. i quickly learned neurotypical buckaroos do not like this, that there is a BOB AND WEAVE to social interactions that must be learned. 
later i realized ‘actually if i WANT to make friends and prove love is real then i can do this like an expert because i can SEE the game where most cant’. this got chuck many buds and took me on many adventures. please understand, i am not saying these connections are not important to me, they are just different. they are full of love, but i express this in my own unique way.
HOWEVER, while growing up i felt disconnected from this timeline in other ways, like an alien or a reverse twin trotting along in a world that is not quite my own. i did not feel emotions the same way my buds did. they would get upset over the ‘human game’ interactions and i would not be moved at all, HOWEVER i could see the way sunlight hit a window and start crying my dang eyes out over the beauty. so my emotion was still there and VERY STRONG, i just felt it in more existential ways (like hearing the call of the lonesome train). these days that feeling has progressed to where i am pretty much in a constant blissed out state of cosmic emotional connection (make of that last sentence what you will, but it is the truth). when i make existential posts online i am not just FIRING OFF SOME CONTENT, i really mean every word. this is really my trot.
anyway as a young buckaroo these feelings made me worry sometimes. i thought about various mental health dianosises and marked the parts and pieces that matched with myself. am i this? am i that? sometimes, instead of just being’ different’ i worried i might actually be ‘wrong’. 
when i saw david byrne on letterman in my younger days i immediately recognized something connected to myself. i thought ‘wow this is the mystery being solved before my very eyes.’ i could hear it in the music of talking heads too. i started doing research and realized that i might be on autism spectrum, something that was later confirmed by a therapist (back then the diagnosis was called asperger's). it was a glorious and fulfilling moment. i was SO EXCITED TO BE AUTISTIC LIKE MY HERO. i felt very cool because of it, and i still feel very cool because of it.
one of the big reasons i talk so much about being autistic these days is because i want to make sure OTHER buckaroos can have that same moment that i did. they can see chuck and think ‘wow i really like this autistic artist, maybe being autistic is cool’
so what does an average day WITHOUT wearing the pink bag look like for me?
my thought process is exactly like ROSE from CAMP DAMASCUS, which is part of why i wrote the book. we have the same stim (complex order of finger taps), we prepare for social interactions the same way, we analyze things in the same logical trot that neurotypical people might think feels ‘detached’ but for me feels natural (certain reviews of camp damascus are very funny to me in this way. you can tell when a reader is just very confused by existing in an autistic brain for 250 pages.)
from the outside you would not be able to tell that i am on the spectrum. in fact you would probably find me very socially adept. 
the problem is, all of that masking can take its toll. i spent years trotting in and out the emergency room, talking to confused doctors who could not figure out the chronic phantom tension and pain that radiated through my body. i eventually accepted the fact that i would either live a life constantly on heavy painkillers or just stop living altogether.
eventually, however, i started noticing a correlation between the way that i felt, and the space that i allowed for chuck and the pink mask. i was exercising that tension, allowing my mental mask of neurotypical existence to take a rest. i started practicing physical therapy and this time THE RESULTS STUCK because i was approaching from two sides, MIND AND BODY. after a while, i got my pain down to about 5 percent of what it once was. i still have flare ups in times of stress, but the healing has been very real and life changing.
lets get VERY specific now. if i attended the TXLA confrence without a mask and gave my talk i can tell you this: i would do a dang good job. i can work the heck out of a crowd and (not to reveal too much about my secret way) I HAVE BEEN KNOWN TO DO THIS ON OCCASION VERY WELL. however, going home from this event i would very likely be in pain. i would likely need to do physical therapy. i would likely need to stim for a while. i would NOT be emotionally fullfilled in the same way. in other words, without my pink mask i can charm the heck out of buckaroos, but THE SPACE OF CHUCK TINGLE IS NOT THE SPACE FOR THAT. the pink bag is a place for me to not have to put up with that tension. it is a place for me to unmask mentally by masking physically.
this pink bag space SAVED MY LIFE and i am not going to risk blurring these lines. if and when that ever happens it will be MY decision, not someone elses. that is my boundary. the part of me that neurotypically masks could handle a library conference in a purely technical sense, but the part of me that chuck represents absolutely cannot and should not be asked to do that without the pink bag. unfortunately, the complexity of this point makes it even MORE difficult for me to think about and takes up even more of my time, because it forces me to START QUESTIONING MYSELF and my own needs. to be honest, that is the most insidious part of other people questioning your identify and refusing to accept your accommodation needs without ‘proof’.
the thing is, while all of this discussion of disability and accessibility is important, i have a much larger point to make by writing these words.
a conference should not uninvite someone with an unusual physical presentation or a strange way of speaking REGARDLESS of it being classified as a disability. it does not matter WHY i look the way that i look and wear what i wear. i should not have to spend all day writing this post instead of writing my next book, just because my sensibilities are unique and my presentation is unusual. 
fortunately the solution is very simple: let other people be themselves. its not hurting you to simply accept and nod at the buckaroos you think look strange. let us exist
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bazelgeuce · 1 year
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Jeez opportunities really do just happen to people huh
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tinylittlebab · 1 year
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my dash is so dead its so sad >_<
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mobbu-min · 5 months
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☆ erm, let's not do that ☆
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requested by anon! Hi there! So i would like to request The overblot gang with a S/O who likes to pick on their fingers whenever they are stressed and considering what Yuu have to go through, they would have a bloody hand if it werent for the fact they use gloves when they are really stressed out. (They dont wear gloves often because it will look weird when it doesnt fit the outfit but will wear it if necessary). So what are the overblot gang (seperate) reactions when he learns why his S/O pick on their fingers and wear gloves? P.s. you are an amazing writer and i love your work, keep up the good work! Hope you have a lovely day/night!
a/n so it's been awhile... how have you guys been? i've been okay, been dealing with post graduation fatigue and depression. been wondering what the hell am i doing with my world and wondering if things are really worth it. i miss bts, i miss jin and hobi and most of all yoongi. i miss the person i used to be. i miss the person that was my rock for a good few years. i wish this whole life thing wasn;t so hard, but! twst makes my brain go brrrr, so that's good i guess lolol. i'm working on stuff dw! and i'll try to post more, so thank you all so much to those who have been waiting! i love you all!!! <333
characters mentioned: overblot boys!
!tw! blood, would this be considered self harm? (an actual question btw)
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Riddle Rosehearts <3
⋆ He’s so concerned. Honestly, when he saw the state of your hands, he gasped like some Victorian man seeing an ankle for the first time.
⋆ He’s not the type to beat around the bush, but he’s gentle about it. He’s quick to voice his concern for your health and if there’s any way for him to help you. 
⋆ Knowing that he is part of the cause of your pain, sorta sends him spiraling somewhat. It really makes Riddle want to become a better person after seeing the after effects of his tyranny.
⋆ Whenever Riddle sees you picking at your hands, he kinda swats at your hands like an angry cat. A disappointed pout on his soft features. He really tries okay. 
⋆ Riddle will patch your hand up. He’s so gentle about it too. Holding your hands as if they were blessed by the Queen of Hearts (honestly there’s probably a rule about it)
⋆ He’s taken to holding your hand when you're together. He stutters out a quick ‘I-it’s to help you!’ before dragging you away to study. When you're alone, Riddle has the habit of kissing your hands, mumbling sweet words. 
⋆ Overall, Riddle is concerned but willing to do anything to help you.
“If you ever find the urge to harm yourself, no matter how small, I ask you to seek me out. I will always spare you a moment. Afterall, I care about you, please don’t forget that.”
Leona Kingscholar <3
⋆ He noticed the state of your hands the moment he met you, but didn’t mention it until you grew closer. Like Riddle, he doesn’t beat around the bush. But unlike Riddle, Leona is so incredibly blunt.
⋆ After you tell him it’s a habit you’ve picked up after certain events, Leona drops the subject. The both of you are too awkward to keep it going. Afterall, you both knew what events could have led you here. Guilt was quick to snag Leona’s heart.
⋆ He’s not upfront about his emotions. Leona’s quite bad with vocalizing his worries, but he’s always been a firm believer in actions over words anyways.
⋆ Expensive gloves, creams and ointments from his land, heck even fidget toys he’s seen Cheka play with, shows up at your door. Anything he believes that could help you, he’s getting.
⋆ If you’re together and your hands get particularly bad, he’s dragging you to the infirmary to patch you up (he ends up snagging/buying bandages to keep on him just in case after) He doesn’t really talk much, but the sentiment is there.
⋆ Like Riddle, Leona will hold your hands to stop you from picking at your skin. His grip is tight, but not in a way that seems like he’s scolding you or mad, but tight in a way that's comforting. As if saying ‘I’m here.’
‘Oi, stop that… Yeah, I’m aware, but I’m here now. Let’s find other ways to deal with your stress, yeah? (whispering) I think I’ve got a few ideas, if you’re up to it, herbivore~’
Azul Ashengrotto <3
⋆ He beats around the bush. Azul is weirddddd about it.
⋆ On one hand, he’s worried about you. On the other hand, his capitalist side wants to find some way to profit off it. Somehow he manages to quell both sides. (he ends up making hand cream/ointment using like floyd’s mucus thing, rip floyd)
⋆ Azul, despite his incessant need to bottle up his emotions for others, finds it hard to ignore the state of your hands, and likewise state of your health, any longer. He doesn’t know how to approach the topic. Does he ask right away? Should he ease you into it? He, for the first time since his overblot, is lost for words.
⋆ He does eventually get the guts to ask and oh boy, he never knew guilt felt this bad.
⋆ Azul kinda sucks at helping you, he won’t hold your hand (only in private) and he’s kinda frivolous with money (so no expensive gifts) but he’s good with his words. And when he sees you starting to pick at your hands, he immediately starts running his mouth. And he can talk for hours. And he’s entertaining too. Leaving you so enraptured by his words that you forget about the need to pick at your skin.
⋆ He’s always good at always keeping you busy. And no this isn’t some way to get free labor out of you. Typically you help him with paper work, just you and him in his little office.
⋆ Azul may always be boasting about how kind he is outloud, but you both know his true kindness is always quiet.
‘Ah, that’s enough paperwork for today. How about we go to the lounge for a few drinks? There’s plenty more I wish to share with you about the stock market.’
Jamil Viper <3
⋆ He doesn’t notice until you’re hissing in pain from something spicy touching your tender skin (listen i know this does make sense, but trust me, it hurts) He’s confused and worried at first and confused and worried after.
⋆ Jamil scolds you for working without some sort of protection while he tenderly washes your hands.
⋆ I feel like Jamil also has some bad coping habits, so he’s quick to put two and two together. He doesn’t ask, but there is a noticeable shift in his behavior. Jamil is a lot more gentle, not in a demeaning way, but in an awkward ‘I want to help you, but idk how, just please appreciate my efforts’ sorta way.
⋆ Since he still has his duties as Vice Housewarden and Kalim’s aid, he’s pretty tight on time, but he tries his best to spare you a few minutes. And if he can’t, you’ll always find a lunch box sitting on your desk.
⋆ Jamil is always willing to bandage your hands if they get particularly bad. He’ll use healing ointment that smells like home and is as gentle as his voice.
⋆ And while he can’t give you extraordinary gifts or talk for hours on end, Jamil is always ready to lend you a hand to heal your own destruction like how you healed him.
‘Stop squirming so much, I’ll mess up your banadages. -sigh- You really have to start wearing some sort of gloves… Mh? What was that?… You like it when I bandage your hand? E-eh- ahem, well if you like it so much, I might as well start charging you. …Ahaha, I never said thuarmarks, did I?”
Vil Schoenheit <3
⋆ He takes one look at your hand and instantly brings out a 12 step hand routine.
⋆ Listen, he doesn't care if you do it out of stress, he’s going to fix your hands while helping you find better ways to handle it.
⋆ He rubs like this gel liquid thing that tastes bad to prevent you from biting away the skin near your nail (it’s an actual thing don’t worry) He’s pulling all the stops to prevent you from injuring your hands even more than they already are.
⋆ Vil often walks the fine line of being really gentle or really strict about it. And it doesn’t stem from his perfection issues, he is just kinda bad at expressing his emotions in a way that is both productive and compassionate. He does care, you’ll just have to look for hidden meanings in his long lectures.
⋆ No doubt, Vil is getting both of you matching gloves with your signature colors as accents.
⋆ The whole 12 step hand routine actually does become routine for the both of you. Typically taking place at Pomefiore, you’ll both talk about your day. Vil sees this as a way to check off all three boxes.
⋆ He gets to do his nightly hand routine.
⋆ You're improving day by day from talking about your emotions with him.
⋆ And he gets to spend one on one time with you!
⋆ It's a win-win situation! And your hands have never been softer!
‘And Epel just had to prove his point, which ended up with him casting a Zip Tight Spell on him. Despite not even being able to move his mouth, I could tell there was so much anger running though his little body. Goodness, how ridicu-hm? Did my little spudling fall asleep? How rude~ -sigh- Sweet dreams, darling~’
Idia Shroud <3
⋆ It’s Ortho that brings up your problem. Worry evident in his voice as he showed pictures of your hands to his big brother.
⋆ Despite being gaming buddies, Idia really never paid attention to your outer appearance. Too preoccupied in his desire to beat you at every game you both play.
⋆ And poor Idia, guilt grabs him by his long ass hair and flings his lanky body across the room multiple times (not really, but in Idia’s head that what's happening)
⋆ Unlike all of the others mentioned, Idia’s way of help is rather unconventional. He’s not good at talking nor is he good at physical touch, but you know what he is good at? Yeah, making things.
⋆ After a long night, Idia shows up at Ramshackle holding a small box. What is in the box? Well your own personal health robocat! This cat is kinda like Ortho just to a lesser degree (think of the robocat seven made mc!)
⋆ Listen, he knows he’s severely lacking in multiple departments of this whole dating, heck even friend, thing, but he is trying! And RoboCat is the ultimate form of his love! It’s quite romantic really.
⋆ Is Grim happy about the new intruder? No! But your health is more important than his feelings!
⋆ Idia swears he died of pure happiness at your expression. His two favorite things together!? Eek! It’s too much!
‘A-and next time you find yourself in trouble, just c-call for Robocat and she’ll come flying!… A laser beam like Ortho? Good idea! I’ll make sure to add it in her name update!’
Malleus Draconia <3
⋆ His heart aches to see the pain you put yourself through. If it was up to him, he’d simply whisk you away to a place where no stress could muddle your beautiful mind. If he could, he would kill stress itself.
⋆ But alas, he can’t kill something that doesn’t have a physical form, how sad~ (lilia had to convince him not to go after Crowley)
⋆ Malleus is doing everything he can to help you. Just name it and he’s doing it.
⋆ Multiple gloves made of the finest materials? Got it!
⋆ Healing ointment from the farthest land made from an extinct organism? Done!
⋆ The heads of your enemies? Why didn’t you say so sooner!
⋆ He’s so silly ahahaha.
⋆ But seriously, Malleus sorta never feels stressed (he does, just thinks stress is a human emotion that only humans can feel) but he’s always willing to listen to you. Afterall, you’re always willing to lend your ears to him, it’s the bare minimum.
⋆ Advice? It’s so-so, sometimes he comes off vague but that really just because of his faeness. But he tries and is actively trying to be better, trying to be more intune with your emotions and his. (lilia has been great help, and surprisingly enough, watching silver and sebek on a more friendly level has also helped him be more in tune with emotions)
⋆ You shouldn't have to suffer in silence and he’ll make sure you never will for as long as the universe will let him.
‘You’ve been such a good companion, my dearest child of man, so please let me return the favor. Allow me to see the deepest parts of your soul, of your mind and heart. If you fear that I will cast judgment, do not. I could never judge the soul that has welcomed me with an open heart.’
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halfway-house-in-hell · 2 months
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angel dust redesign🕷️
(click for better quality)
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and since theyre the first sinner ive posted, they get a human design!
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rambling under the cut
(if my handwriting in the second image is unreadable you can check the id)
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-angel dust was a sinner that died in 1948. they were a member of a large mafia family and led a secret life as a drag queen
-they were born into the family, and were unable to leave bc. you know. life of crime
-much of their family looked down on them and mocked them bc of their feminine mannerisms
-they had a particularly bad relationship with their father, who saw them as a failure of a son
-so they turned to drag and underground queer clubs instead (angel dust was their drag name that they adopted full time after dying, anthony was their "real" name)
-they also turned to cocaine, often stealing from their family's stash
-their death happened because they were lousy hiding the tracks of their theft- the family got a tip off that angel had been stealing and that they were currently in an aforementioned queer club
-mafia family storms the queer club, angel comes out off their head on cocaine, their father finds then and shoots them in the chest before slamming their head against the wall repeatedly, killing them
-their and all of their family's (except their sister) demon forms are spiders, symbolising the web of lies they spun😎 because angel died in drag they also have a much more feminine demon form
-they enjoyed life in hell for a while, but soon enough other members of their family started dying and began looking for them. this caused them to flee to the nearest hiding space they had, a place called Valentino's that promised a safe haven against any threats
-as we know this promise is absolute bullshit
-angel signed the contract that allowed them entry to valentino's. they were panicked and signed it hastily, not looking at the fine print.
-they become trapped at valentino's, forced to be a prostitute
-until valentino himself visits and likes the look of angel, deciding that he wants angel for himself
-he takes on angel as a prostitute/porn star/stripper/whatever valentino wants them to be today, with valentino abusing them behind the scenes
-valentino lovebombs them often, buying them expensive gifts they are required to wear and feeding their drug habit
-despite being famous, most of the money angel makes goes straight into valentinos pocket. this is what leads them to finding charlie's hotel, as they do not have enough money to pay rent and the happy hotel offers free accommodation.
-angel's best friend is cherry bomb, an anarchist who wants nothing more than to free them- but she has no money, no connections and is banned from most places on sight due to her habit of blowing stuff up. when angel dust gets sad and mopey, she gets angry for them
-angel uses they/them, but hell isnt the most progressive place, so few demons use it for them. they dont really care though, they have bigger things to worry about
-they actually physically cannot harm valentino, as part of their contract states that any harm valentino goes through also happens to them
-they like to keep up with the latest trends, and have a decent sinstagram following
-they are hypersexual due to trauma
-i think thats it. if i forgot smth im gonna be so mad
oki thanks for reading :33
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cranberryjuice-posts · 2 months
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hiii want to say that i just met your blog and i obsessed with it!! i really love your writing. anddd i want to make a abby request, abby and reader are in college and abby is like super popular and when they start to date reader is called “abbys girl” all the time and get super flustered? i dont know if i express myself good, english is not my first language, sorry! hope u have a amazing day, xoxo <3
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- Abby’s girl -
Pairings - modern au! Abby Anderson x Fem! Reader
An - this is kinda bad I’m sorry 😭😭 I wasn’t really sure what plot to write but I still appreciate the request.
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Everybody was cheering. With only a minute left on the clock the Seattle wolves vrs the Jackson mustangs— one of the oldest lasting rivals on and off the court, were pushing one another around trying to keep Abby from making her shot.
The blonde dodged around trying to avoid the other team. Making it to the 3 point line she threw the ball. Going through the hoop the clock blared at the same time, the referees announced the wolves win making the home side scream with excitement.
Abby shouted happily, making eye contact with you she grinned. Making your way out of the stands was easier said then done.
Eventually getting to the locker room you walked towards Abby’s spot. One of her teammates walked past you taking a moment to say hi. “Shit It’s Abby’s girl, hey she’s just over there the girls are cheering for her”
You felt your face turn red, “oh thanks” with a smile you watched as she walked away before going towards the shouting. Being the girlfriend of the basketball team captain tended to help boost your own reputation. Most of them didn’t know your name only addressing you as ‘Abby’s girl’.
Was it your preferred way of being addressed… well no. But it wasn’t the end of the world, all it did really was embarrass you.
Setting your purse down by Abby’s duffel bag on the bench you watched as the girls other girls crowded around her, chanting Abby’s name while they all celebrated their big win which would now take them to state. You were and always will be Abby’s biggest supporter, no matter what you would never miss any of her games.
She instantly noticed your presence, breaking free abby quickly made her way to you. Grabbing you by the waist she pulled you into a messy kiss. It was full of adrenaline and not coordinated. Pulling back Abby kept her face close to yours. A few of the other girls on the team chuckled at the display making you blush. “Hey” abby flirted against your lips.
“Hi” You giggled “You did amazing out there.. I mean really I genuinely believe Your Gonna win this thing”
“And im Gonna do even better tonight” she continued her cocky streak, pressing your hips against hers.
You rolled your eyes finding her attempts at seduction funny. “Uh huh, I’m gonna wait for you outside ok” kissing her one more time you gasped as she grabbed your ass. You rolled your eyes as you pulled back, giving her a warning look as Abby remained on her high.
You sat down on a bench near by the exit. Pulling out your phone you started to scroll on Instagram, trying to decided what to make a post about. That and finding a new restaurant near by to take Abby to, just to celebrate her big win before she actually tried to get you pregnant.
“So your Abby’s girl huh?” A woman spoke. Looking up you were taken back by seeing Ellie Williams the Jackson mustangs team captain.
Confused you nodded “uh yeah..”
She just scoffed. “How the hell did she manage to pull you” standing up you grabbed your purse, Ellie knew you had been offended by what she said.
“First of all she didn’t pull anyone, how we got into a relationship was because she’s a good person and secondly” you looked her up and down “why are you even over here, your bus is on the other side of campus”
“Damn, I was just asking” she laughed crossing her arms “but seriously though Abby? Her being a good person, that’s total bullshit she’s anything but good, besides I can do anything she does”
“Except win a Game”
You could tell Ellie was starting to loose her patience. Why was she over by you, to hell if you knew. There was a tense silence between you both, before she could speak the back door opened.
Abby stood tall and strong as always only her former grin was replaced with a look of disgust. Getting up you walked over to her, kissing her cheek. “Williams”
“Anderson”
Both girls staring at each-other with a Look of hate, You had heard Time and time again the rivalry between the two schools and between their families. “Why are You over here, and better question why are you talking to my girl”
“Fuck dude nobody’s trying to fight Dina just forgot her bag inside I offered to come get it.” Ellie looked at one once again before gesturing her head to Abby. “Your Girl seems like a real catch, guess you got lucky”
“Guess i did” her response was harsh. At this point you were fed up with the conversation and dealing with Ellie. Grabbing Abby’s hand you pulled her away.
——
Sitting on Abby’s bed you laughed softly at watching her go on a rant. “And don’t get me started on Joel the sheer fucking audacity of that man! He punched my dad because he couldn’t help Ellie. I repeat he punched MY DAD— why are you laughing”
“Nothing Nothing its Just.. your really cute when you get mad” Abby flipped you off making you laugh once again. After a moment she sat down on the bed beside you, taking a calming breath she leaned over kissing you softly, slowly, sensually.. pulling back she gently squeezed your hand.
“What did I do to deserve you” she muttered.
“Not much but working out and getting buff and being blonde helped, you know the important shit” you gave her a charismatic smile
“Your not Funny”
“I’m hilarious”
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