#i dont usually make them bc i rarely have the spoons | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

culminada · 2 months

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If I don't have the spoons to do something, I don't do it.

Or, if it's not worth spending the spoons, I don't spend them. I COULD exert myself and spend extra spoons on a given thing; the question is, is it worth that many spoons?

And a lot of the time it's not. For neurotypicals, brushing your teeth or taking a shower everyday is the most sensible use of time and energy for how much benefit it brings. For me, it's not, because it takes that many more spoons.

The trick is in manipulating how I FEEL about my decision after I've made it. On the one hand, I have to trust myself and my assessment. I gotta be okay chillaxing, marking it up as a loss, and moving on. I'm very good at this. I also have fewer pressures from a neurotypical society because I have a good relationship with my parents and was homeschooled; I haven't learned to feel bad about not matching some ideal. (My mom also is at least ADHD if not also autistic, and for much of my childhood didn't have the spoons to make me brush my teeth every night.)

At base, though, it's simply knowing yourself, being able to trust yourself, and having good enough boundaries to not care what people who don't matter might think of you. If you don't have the spoons to go to that event, don't go. Sure, it's not fun to have to miss an event you were excited for, but if you don't have the spoons then you don't have the spoons; or if it takes more spoons than you were expecting, or you're lower on spoons today than you were expecting, you have to make that call.

You're the only one who can. Everything in life, really, comes down to the question: is it worth it? Is it worth it to care, to act, to express? If not, then don't - and don't sweat it.

I see a lot of neurodivergent memes along the lines of, "worrying bc I'm not being productive -> worry keeps me from being productive-> worry bc I'm not being productive -> repeat cycle," and I don't relate to this because I don't worry abt not being productive.

If I do worry? Then I think what I can do to fix it and ask if that's worth it. If not, I say, too bad so sad, no need to be upset. I made this decision and it's the only sensible decision, now I'll enjoy what I can. The rest for example. Or my special interest. Or sleep.

If I CANT do the thing - e.g., trapped in executive dysfunction - then if I've genuinely tried, and spent as many spoons as I'm willing to on trying, then I can safely give up. I did my best, and so what if I got nothing done? Don't be so hard on myself. I did my best.

If I 1) have made a decision (e.g. I'm not going to the event) and feel bad enough about not going (bc I really did want to go), then I may re-evaluate. Since I've realized I want to go to this thing more than I thought I wanted it, does that mean it's worth spending more spoons? How many more? Is it enough to actually go? Do I want to go bad enough to spend all the spoons I need to?

If so, I go! Yay! I usually enjoy myself. Sometimes there's consequences (e.g. no spoons for something else). I try to consider those when making my decision though. If I decide its not worth the spoons, I don't go. I chillax. I don't sweat it.

Sweating it takes spoons, don't you know. I've got those in short supply. I gotta save them for important things that I DO care enough to spend spoons on.

Sometimes, a given thing takes spoons to let go of. Change is hard for the autistic brain. Sometimes it deals -10hp to spoon storage and that can't be helped. Sometimes, it can be helped with logic and autonomy. I get to make the final decision if I do the thing or not. That's autonomy.

I'll say this: I rarely face a situation where I dont HAVE spoons at all in the first place. Couldn't do it even if I was willing to spend 100 spoons because I don't have them. Maybe this is because I'm good at managing my spoons, have an understanding family, environment, and my culture doesn't expect outrageous things of me (*cough cough* graduation *cough cough* college *cough cough* a job), or maybe I just have the autism 'milder.'

Regardless, for neurodivergents and neurotypicals alike, knowing how to manage your anxiety, spoons, and autonomy is important.

The few times I've simply not had the spoons, it's been awful. Autonomy is one of the big huge things that helps me manage my life and feel okay about myself. One morning a few weeks ago I couldn't work (executive dysfunction because I wasn't dressed in the right clothes) and I couldn't get dressed (too many spoons, also would take way too long). And I sat and cried because I'd been trying all week to get to work. (I work for my father btw.) I'd been tweaking my sleep schedule, trying to get off Tumblr the Executive Function Destroyer, etc. For a week and I finally was at a place where I was 1) awake, 2) not getting bogged down with things all morning, 3) capable of working, and... I wasn't actually capable of working. For something wholly outside my control.

I WANT to work. I enjoy my work. I enjoy the people I'm with. I want to impress the people I'm with. I DON'T want to disappoint them. We have a vision and I'm enthusiastic about it. Our project is amazing and I want to help. AND I COULDN'T.

Thats awful. I don't know how people deal with it regularly.

Having to stress about things, I think, takes a huge toll on spoons. If you can't do a thing, then don't, and don't sweat it. Maybe it helps to have a higher power to trust in, because I know it does for me - but please. Don't stress it. You're only hurting yourself. Make the decision once, maybe twice, and let it rest.

#actually autistic #autistic adult #autism

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kaitosimp · 3 years

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As a filthy, filthy multi shipper I’d like to know both headcannons you have for all his pairings and why you like them so much, if you want to of course!

As soon as I read this, my mind started ranting so hard 😂 I will happily answer! And tysm for asking bc if being able to talk about kaito is rare, imagine how much ive talked about the ships i have with him, so im very happy rn!! 🥰 WARNING: dis gonna be long as hell 👁👄👁

OKAY SO the two main ships I have for Kaito are Oumota and Saimota, Saimota is my fave ship and Oumota is my fave comfort ship! The other ships I rlly like with him are Akamota, Amamota, and Momoharu, i pretty much read any fic that has him paired with someone but these are the ones i search for on my own whereas the others its a "i'll read 'em if i come across em" type of deal! So lets dive in 👁👄👁 (i have endless hc's for my ships so i'll only give a few or else this'll never end)

🌌🎭 Oumota 🎭🌌

Reasons: I am a goddamn sucker for thematic parallels, enemies to friends to lovers, and the rivals tropes 🌚 I dont even know how i fell into the oumota hole, cause i didnt consider it much in game, but after reading a few fics it just made me so happy! I love their banter and clashing personalities and stubborness lol, and goddamn, the post game/hangar fics for them are *chef's kiss*

Hc's:

-The way Kokichi tried to get Kaito to see he had feelings for him was by bothering/pranking the absolute shit out of him, but Kaito's dense to these things so he didnt even realize Kokichi stopped bothering other ppl to target him specifically

-When Kaito realized he had feelings for Kokichi, his initial reaction was "oh fuck oh no why him pls no-"

-Eventually Kokichi had to directly tell him to his face he liked Kaito cause Kaito wasn't getting the message at all

-Kokichi loves stealing Kaito's clothes, esp his jacket

-They argue a lot but its over the absolute dumbest shit like before they got together, its usually nothing serious

-Kokichi secretly loves listening to Kaito talk about space, though he teases Kaito about it

-Kaito's fave thing is to cuddle/spoon Kokichi, cause he's the perf size to snuggle with

🌌🔍 Saimota 🔍🌌

Reasons: CAUSE YES!!! From the beggining of Shuichi being the main, Kaito is there for him and supports him so much and makes sure Shuichi is okay, he's just so supportive and loving and helpful and motivational and he's something Shuichi def needed to move forward in the killing game! I just fucking love their dynamic and how they help each other and how they balance each other out as well, plus the whole hero and sidekick thing is adorable! AND OFC THE FAMOUS "i shouldnt be talking about another boy like that" LINE ASDFGHJKL ITS CANON OKAY

Hc's:

-Shuichi confessed first, it took a few times for him to get his feelings across properly bc each time he said something like "i like you" or whatev kaito was like "aw bro i like you too!"

-Kaito tried to get over his crush on Shuichi bc he thought Shuichi wouldn't go for someone like him (i hc him being kinda insecure and covering it up with that confident persona of his)

-Shuichi isn't big on physical contact, but he makes the exception for Kaito bc he's always so warm and gives the best hugs

-Shuichi is the only person who Kaito lets see him vulnerable, it took a lot of time but he eventually learned to stop bottling everything with Shuichi

-Kaito constantly takes Shuichi stargazing, its his fave thing to do and Shuichi is ever so happy to accompany Kaito and listen to space rambles

-Their first kiss was beyond awkward and Shuichi nearly fainted but they got the hang of it eventually

🌌🥑 Amamota 🥑🌌

Reasons: I literally saw an amamota fic on ao3 and it won me over oops- to me it just makes sense! They're both adventurers in a way and i love their personalities together, Kaito's boisterous nature would be a nice change of pace for the ever calm Rantaro and Rantaro's mellow nature would be something refreshing for Kaito y'know?

Hc's:

-Kaito always tried helping Rantaro catch up in classes bc he always misses 'em to travel and he was always the first one to welcome him back

-Rantaro got attached to Kaito and didnt even realize it until he came back one day and kaito wasnt there to greet him (cue disappointed rantaro and bAM thats when he realized)

-Kaito loves hearing about Rantaro's travels, he's always asking for pics and details

-Kaito confessed first, he literally couldn't take it anymore and just threw it out there while Rantaro was mid greeting

-Rantaro didn't tell Kaito about his sisters until about a year into their relationship bc he was scared Kaito would disappear too

-Rantaro literally re-visited a bunch of islands and countries in the artic circle just to take pics/vids of the aurora borealis for Kaito

🌌🎹 Akamota 🎹🌌

Reason: I just think they'd be sooo cute together 🥺 Kaito and Kaede are both positive people who try to help others and their personalities fit so well together! Idk man it just makes sense to me

Hc's:

-Kaito absolutely loves hearing Kaede play the piano, sometimes he'll sneak record her so he can listen to it whenever he's feeling down

-Kaede tries teaching him how to play the piano, instruments aren't his thing but he tries his best in the lessons cause it makes her happy

-Kaito's confession was accidental, he was just listening to her play when he blurted out how pretty she was, which led to an awkward confession talk with lots of blushing

-Kaede has tried to compose a piano piece that embodies Kaito's personality but she fails everytime, cause his larger than life personality is hard to capture perfectly

-They're both big on affection, so they're constantly holding hands and hugging

AND FINALLY, 🌌🔪 Momoharu 🔪🌌

Reason: THEY'RE GREAT TOGETHER OKAY 🥺 I just love how Kaito got Maki to come out of her shell and how he trusted her/accepted her!! He gave her the cutest nickname and befriended her and literally gave his life up to protect her, aND MAKI'S CONFESSION ABOUT FALLING FOR KAITO STILL MAKES ME CRY

Hc's:

-Maki confessed it ever so casually while mid training, which literally made Kaito fall over in shock

-Kaito loves Maki's hair, he could spend hours playing with it and he always helps her brush it

-Maki hates her scars, but Kaito's always there to kiss em and remind her how beautiful she is, he always traces constellations on 'em when they cuddle

-Maki's constantly scared she'll accidentally hurt Kaito, or that he'll get hurt bc of her past

-Kaito's very protective of her, just like Maki is of him

-Maki loves the sound of Kaito's voice, her favorite thing is to listen to him talk about space

W O W i am so sorry for this massive post 💀 I seriously tried limiting myself asdfghjkl oops

#kaito momota #shuichi saihara #kokichi ouma #kaede akamatsu #rantaro amami #maki harukawa #saimota #oumota #amamota #akamota #momoharu #danganronpa v3 #someone help why is this so damn long

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light-of-valentia · 5 years

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Boys’ Snuggling Headcanons

ok so for whatever reasons my writing is blowing up now, so i’m gonna take advantage of that and write some probably shitty headcanons right now n post em!!! i’m gonna write these for ALL the student boys too, not just golden deer! i got admin lil right next to me so we talkin these over and writin em together- admin belle

adding this cut bc this is gonna be REALLY long and i dont wanna eat up yall’s dashes kdfhgjdfghlkh, no nsfw content or spoilers though

Black Eagles

Hubert von Vestra

Not super big on cuddling most of the time, as physical affection isn’t his best love language

He has really clammy hands and while he isn’t self-conscious per se, he knows he wouldn’t want to be subjected to such clamminess himself

Likes to slip an arm around his your waist

Doesn’t like to face his partner while cuddling

Holds himself close to his partner’s body while they fall asleep

He will absolutely play with your hair once you are asleep though

Ferdinand von Aegir

Affectionate both in public and private, but more so in private

“A true noble would always shower his dearest in affection”

If you’re ok with it, he would love subtle cuddles in public, like slipping his arm around you if you’re near him or “stretching” to sling his arm over your shoulders to pull you closer

Prefers to be a big spoon, but if you really wanted to be the big spoon, he would 100% let you

He is touch-starved please snuggle him

Likes to run his fingers through your hair and ramble about how amazing you are, how he loves you, etc.

Caspar von Bergliez

He HAS to be the big spoon

Even if you’re much taller or larger than him, he thrives off of feeling like he is protecting you

He loves it when s/o lays their head on his chest

Thrives off of nuzzling his face into the crook of his partner’s neck

Loves to hug his partner tight and close to him, like he’s never gonna let go

If you or he had a bad day, expect cuddles the minute you two get a chance

Cuddles happen on his bed because then when his you is gone, it still smells like you

Linhardt von Hevring

Sleepy boy loves snuggling, but you’ll never hear him say it

Reason?? He’s never awake long enough to realize

If you two are on a couch or bed and he’s drowsy, he’ll just use you as a pillow

He’s like a koala he’ll just latch on

Loves being the little spoon but, again, won’t admit it

Likes to face you and run his fingers through your hair

The pillow he lost on campus was because of him using “I lost my pillow” as an excuse to use you for one

Blue Lions

Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd

He is so cuddly oh my god

Physical contact from you is just so healing to him he is so touch starved PLEASE cuddle him

He will totally walk around with you in his coat like a bat with his wings folded around you, hugging you to his torso

He is super shy, but also very clingy, so this is how he gets his necessary dose of you during the day when you aren’t alone

If he had a rough day or he is being bothered by memories from his past, he will come into your room crying and that’s how you know it’s snuggle time

Absolutely loves being the little spoon but he will never admit this to you

Depending on his mood, sometimes he just likes to curl up around you and hold you tight, and other times he just likes to bury his face in your chest as refuge from the world

Also reeeally loves to face you when cuddling

He really likes to lay on your chest and feel your heartbeat

This boy just loves to snuggle so much, the physical contact and closeness just puts him at ease

If you let him, he will cling to you like a stuffed animal while you both fall asleep

Sorry his are so much longer than the other ones- baby boy has been through a lot and he really needs his snuggles

Dedue Molinaro

Not super cuddly by nature, but if you’re into it, he’ll absolutely do it with you

He is like a human furnace, so cuddles with him can be with or without blankets

Faerghus winters too cold for comfort? Call in Dedue and you two will warm up with couch snuggles, hot tea, and books

He always smells like nice spices from whatever he last cooked

It’s usually you who initiates cuddle sessions, though he sometimes will when he is particularly exhausted

He doesn’t get too reachy and ansty with snuggling- he likes to use it to calm down both physically and mentally

Likes to fall asleep with a hand or finger over yours

Ashe Ubert

Lowkey extremely cuddly, but not as dramatic about it as Dimitri

He loves to be the big spoon; he has always been fiercely protective of the ones he loves, having had to provide for his siblings from a very young age, and this definitely shows in his desire to protect you

However, if you want to be the big spoon, he usually won’t object. He tries to be manly and dominant, but sometimes, he can’t help but find himself as putty in your hands

He l o v e s to snuggle you up from behind and nuzzle his face into your hair- the smell of it is heavenly to him

He doesn’t really care if you’re dirty or freshly-bathed, the smell of you and especially your hair is so comforting to him

Loves to hold you tight and run his fingers through your hair or massage your body

After a long day, Ashe likes to lay down with you, your legs and bodies all tangled up together, and just gaze into your eyes

The look he always gives you when you’re snuggling is absolutely radiating with love

Having you asleep in his arms is like the goddesses’ gift to him, and he just likes to pet your hair and comb it, give you little butterfly kisses wherever he can, and administer all sorts of innocent little gifts of affection

Sylvain Jose Gautier

Snuggles with him tend to be either very playful or emotional depending on how he feels

Some days, he just likes to cling to you and massage wherever his hands wind up and gush to you about how lucky he is to have someone who loves him for himself and not his title or crest

Likes to tickle you sometimes, and use your giggling moments of vulnerability to get himself closer to you

If you have longer hair, snuggling Sylvain means he’s gonna end up playing with it

You will have conversations while snuggling and Sylvain will just be twirling little strands of your hair and sometimes even braiding it

Loves falling asleep on your chest, feeling your heartbeat and knowing that you’re real and you really do love him

Felix Hugo Fraldarius

He really likes to feel warm, and he gets his warms from snuggling you

This never happens in public though, always behind closed doors

The first few times you snuggle, he refuses to face you because his face in full blush and he can’t let you see it oh no

Lowkey loves the smell of your hair and how soft your skin is

Likes to ghost his fingers through your hair and nuzzle into your neck

On the rarer occasion, he will be whispering sweet nothings and just snuggling you and clinging to you and humming

He tries to make himself the big spoon, but if you play your cards right, he is putty in your hands

Golden Deer

Claude von Riegan

Likes to start off snuggle sessions with some teasing, but if they don’t escalate into makeout sessions, he likes to enjoy a relatively peaceful silence with you

He likes to do little things in private to get your attention for some snuggles, like pinch your side or tug your wrist lightly

He doesn’t mind maintaining physical closeness with you in public either, though

He absolutely will pull you towards him by the waist, give you a kiss, and snuggle up to you for a hot minute in public, and he really does not care who is watching unless you do

He loves facing you and peppering your face, neck, and collarbone with soft little kisses

Big spoon. Rarely lets you be the big spoon, and when he does, he is such a tease about it

He likes to rub little circles into your lower back and waist

Loves holding you up close to him, chests flushed together, his head resting on top of yours

He really likes it when you tousle his curls and brush through them with your fingers

If you have a developed chest, he has no shame in using your breasts as pillows

Likes it when you fall asleep on top of him

He isn’t clingy per se, but he is like a magnet to you and he enjoys having a physical closeness to you

Lorenz Hellman Gloucester

He tries to upkeep his chivalrous noble attitude while snuggling, but after a little while, he drops the act and just tries to enjoy the moment

Loves to converse with you while your bodies are tangled together

When he’s stressed, he loves it when you give him little back massages

If you’ve recently bathed, he lo o o ves the smell of you all fresh and clean while you snuggle

Sometimes, he fills idle air with praise of you, but other times, he just likes to savor silence

Snuggling with him usually only happens in private, since he gets very flustered with PDA that is not initiated by him

Raphael Kirsten

Big boy like to hug

He is generally super warm, but his hands and feet can be cold

His hair is v e r y soft and he likes when you ruffle through it

He likes to lay down with you and hug you to his chest

Alternatively, he doesn’t mind a bit when you just sprawl over him and use his muscular torso as a pillow

He likes the thought of long snuggle sessions with you, but he tends to fall asleep early on

Ignatz Victor

He likes to be very gentle whilst cuddling you

Prefers to face you so that he can take in and admire how amazing your features are, you’re like a muse to him

Massages? Massages.

Likes to spritz whatever couch or bed you’re using with rose or lavender oil for a nice added aesthetic to relax in

Snuggling is very sensually relaxing to him, and he loves to brush through your hair, take in your scent, and soak up everything you have to offer

Likes to be the big spoon, since it gives him an opportunity to show how much he appreciates you, but doesn’t object to being the little spoon

Glasses usually come off whilst snuggling so he doesn’t break them, but if you are both being still, he will put them back on so that he can appreciate how beautiful/handsome you are

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elliethesuperfruitlover · 3 years

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yes i did this during my lunch break (and in english)

General:

How long will they last? - Mm, if not lifelong than like a good amount of years. They occasionally also see other people though (poly coded)

How quickly did/will they fall in love? - T had to think about actually dating Klaus before getting into it. She looked into his past, everything. She didn’t want to be hurt. Klaus, however was like “mm, personality, shes pretty, smart, im in.”

How was their first kiss? - It was pleasant, it was random, after T met Klaus’ siblings. It wasn’t out of nowhere, but she was like :Thank you for introducing me to your broken family. *smooch*”Casual, but not casual.

Wedding:

Who proposed? - Klaus did. It wasn’t big either, he was just like “do weddings appeal to you?” and she’s always been on the fence about getting married, but she figured to might as well do it.

Who is the best man/men? - Klaus had Diego as his best man actually.

Who is the braid’s maid(s)? - T had her mom as her maid of honor.

Who did the most planning? - They both did equal planning. They’d talk it over and everything, but T likes to have everything exact, so she looked over everything, over and over until she found it fine enough.

Who stressed the most? - Klaus, actually. T enjoys putting things in order, and planning, but Klaus was worried about how everything would go. He wanted to make sure everything went right, and that most of all, T was happy.

How fancy was the ceremony? - Back of a pickup truck | 2 | 3 | 4 | Normal Church Wedding | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Kate and William wish they were this big. It was a forest wedding, so kinda big, but small enough as to where it felt special.

Who was specifically not invited to the wedding?- Anyone that even remotely made T feel uncomfortable. If they were gonna cause issues, they can do it elsewhere. The trees didn’t want to hear arguing. (her one aunt who didn’t want her marrying a white man)

Sex:

Who is on top? - Topazi Um, they’re both switches, but it honestly depends on the mood. If one of them had a rough day, then the other would be the top.

Who is the one to instigate things? - Either of them, it depends.

How healthy is their sex life? - Barely touch themselves let alone each other | 2 | 3 | 4 | Once a couple weeks, nothing overboard | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They are humping each other on the couch right now. One look and the clothes are off (or on they’re kinky fucks)

How kinky are they? - Straight missionary with the lights off | 2 | 3 | 4 | Might try some butt stuff and toys | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Don’t go into the sex dungeon without a horse’s head. T’s fairly kinky, and so is Klaus, so they combine it to create just *sighs*. Their closets have a specific section for sex toys, spicy clothes.

How long do they normally last? - It depends. If they start when they’re high energy, it’ll be for longer, but if it’s later in the day, or after work, it’s for less time. an hour or so.

Do they make sure each person gets an equal amount of orgasms? - Mm, sometimes. If T gets frustrated with herself, and she might be in a bit of a tizzy, Klaus’ll step in and she’ll focus on his pleasure instead of her own. But T usually has more than Klaus, usually 2 more.

How rough are they in bed? - Softer than a butterfly on the back of a bunny | 2 | 3 | 4 | The bed’s shaking and squeaking every time | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Their dirty talk is so vulgar it’d make Dwayne Johnson blush. Also, the wall’s so weak it could collapse the next time they do it. If the mood calls for it, Topazi won’t hesitate to absolutely ruin Klaus. She really likes it rough, and so does Klaus, but they like being gentle every now and then.

How much cuddling/snuggling do they do? - No touching after sex | 2 | 3 | 4 | A little spooning at night, or on the couch, but not in public | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They snuggle and kiss more often than a teen couple on their fifth date to a pillow factory. T is touch oriented, and rarely ever doesn’t want to be touched in some way. She wants all of the hugs during aftercare, and Klaus is very happy to give it to her.

Children:

How many children will they have naturally? - None. T thought about having kids, but she doesn’t trust her body, or herself, so she just doesn’t do it.

How many children will they adopt? - They have pets. (a snake and two kitties)

Who is the stricter parent? - T. She’ll be like “Miko, I told you not to jump off the counter.” but Klaus is like “let him be, he’s just a little shaken up.” but no like water bottles, just a mild scolding.

Cooking:

Who does the most cooking? - T used to do a lot of cooking, but Klaus also tag teams her. Especially if it’s a huge meal.

Who is the most picky in their food choice? - Klaus won’t do oatmeal, or anything mushy. But T is like “if this even looks wrong, I’m not eating it.” It doesn’t matter who cooks it though, she’ll eat from anyone, but if something looks or tastes different than how she’s used to eating it, she’ll eat some out of respect, but in the end may just get more safe things like water, fruit etc.

Who does the grocery shopping? - Both of them. T writes the list (bc she’s very detailed), and they both get half of the list and tag-team. But T has told Klaus what’s safe, what’s not, all that.

How often do they bake desserts? - Almost every weekend. They’re both a bit impulsive, Klaus more than T, so they have an entire fridge dedicated to baking items.

Are they more of a meat lover or a salad eater? - T rarely ever eats red meat, and Klaus’ll eat anything, so it’s a big mix between the two of them. She tries to get everything balanced, then she gets cravings and everything is thrown out of the window.

Who is more likely to surprise the other(s) with an anniversary dinner? - Klaus. He likes repaying T, and whenever T tries to do something nice, something pops up and she can’t. It’s also best for him to do tiny things, not big things, so she doesn’t feel like it’s a competition between the two of them.

Who is more likely to suggest going out? - Klaus. Topazi wants to go out and everything, and she’s impulsive, but never really does anything about it.

Who is more likely to burn the house down accidently while cooking? - Klaus because he almost fucked the kitchen up when he was high and forgot to put his blunt out (the paper towels caught fire, yada yada)

Chores:

Who cleans the room? - T does a lot of cleaning. Not that she feels like she has to, she just enjoys it, plus it gives her a sense of completion.

Who is really against chores? - Klaus sometimes. It’s not that he doesn’t want to, they usually just creep up on him when he really doesn’t want to do them.

Who cleans up after the pets? - Both of them do it equally. Klaus moreso than T though, because one wrong inhale and she’s ill.

Who is more likely to sweep everything under the rug? - Klaus. He can forget about something and it’s just gone. His object permanence is shitty.

Who stresses the most when guests are coming over? - Neither of them. T likes company, and people over, but she does try to make sure no naughty things are left out for people to see.

Who found a dollar between the couch cushions while cleaning? - T almost threw it away, (it was balled up), but she was like “hmm my brain is trying to tell me something” so she was like “oh hells yeah money”

Misc:

Who takes the longer showers/baths? - Depends, but mostly Klaus, because he does his thinking in the shower (like his dad). T, however, knows she’s gonna look like a fucking cherry when she gets out, and she needs to keep her skin not flaky.

Who takes the dog out for a walk? - Um-. If they had a dog, it would be either one of them, but Klaus more often than T, because when she’s painting or gardening, she can’t be bothered to focus on anything other than what she’s doing at that moment.

How often do they decorate the room/house for the holidays? - Very lack-luster. For xmas, they have a tree, but T puts stupid shit around the house. For Easter, she painted an egg pink and labeled it as “the easter bunny’s left testicle” and for Halloween, they have a spooky corner. She can’t do pranks though, she understands them, but she’ll scream then immediately kick to defend herself.

What are their goals for the relationship? - T wants to enjoy what life she has with Klaus. She just wants someone to love her and keep her company.

Who is most likely to sleep till noon? - Both of them. Topazi likes cuddles, and sometimes the sleep is so good you have to just stay down. Plus, she’s her own boss, and their animals are smarter than they initially thought, but if she hears the fucking snake tank open, her eyes are wide fucking open.

Who plays the most pranks? - Even though she gets a bit frustrated from them, T likes to do cute pranks. You know those toys that you throw and they stick to something, she’ll do those. And Klaus throws like sticky tack at the wall. Those she can handle. But she doesn’t understand the purpose of someone fake sneezing on her. (like me, please dont do that shit, i dont like it)

#topazi marshall

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maknaesdancersrappers · 4 years

Text

july 21

hello. july 21 is a special day for me and you dont have to read this because its just me venting out my thoughts and emotions as long as i can without word/character limits on any platform.

july 21 is my maternal grandmother’s birthday. when i was born, my mom went abroad often and my dad had the regular 9 to 5 job plus extra hours for commute. so growing up with my sisters who are 5 and 7 years older, our grandparents and aunts took care of us.

im also more fond of my maternal grandmother since my paternal grandmother lived far away and we rarely ever get to see her (usually only during summers and once she stayed with us for awhile) until she passed away from Alzheimer's.

during the long hiatus i took early this year (late december to mid-march?), a lot has happened in my life. my health was put at risk because of the ash fall brought by the volcano eruption (january 12); i had allergies for weeks - i couldnt breathe properly, let alone sleep because of it. it was about to be the second year after graduating college and i have yet to get a job; the pressure from my family - and myself - was so unbearable that i caught myself slipping back to my very, very, very dark thoughts. and the worst thing that happened in those three months: my grandmother passed away. in filipino, grandmother is lola (loh-lah) and i’d like to use that for the rest of this post.

if you ask anyone in their neighborhood, any of our family friends, and relatives, everyone will tell you that her death was sudden. because everyone knows her as the sometimes-funny-sometimes-cranky old lady that owns the convenience store at the corner of the street. she was 96. she was 96 but she refused to get a wheelchair or use a walking stick even though her knees started to hurt after a few steps. she was 96 but didn’t need glasses to read most of the time. she was 96 but didn’t have any maintenance medication. ever since she reached her 90′s, she had gone to the town clinic at least twice because she fell over (from loss of balance) and busted her head. yet she would walk the next day like she doesnt have stitches on her scalp. she hated going to the doctor, she’d always claim that nothing hurts and the only thing she wanted the doctor to fix was her hearing (its as weak as how her eyesight is clear)

i wasnt the only one in the family that got severely affected by the ash fall. my lola also had trouble breathing because of it. she also went to the doctor for it and they only prescribed her antibiotics. please remember this info. this should be around early february

she got a little better but her voice was very hoarse from the phlegm. even before this, lola had little to no appetite and would only eat when someone else is eating (usually if it’s us, her granddaughters). and by little to no appetite, i mean her whole meal would be three spoonfuls of rice and one piece/chunk of whatever the main dish/ulam is. whenever we ask if she had eaten (even though we know she hadnt) she’d always claim that she already has (this eventually became a little joke in our family.) we took this sign as her dementia getting worse (although she was never really diagnosed with it, we had naturally assumed it because she would always repeatedly tell us stories that she insists happened even though some have been debunked and there were times she forgets our names if we havent visited in a while.)

after she gets better from the cough (idk the real diagnosis of it), her legs started to swell and because her routine had been reduced to being bedridden for most of the day, my aunts thought it was just poor circulation. it took two weeks before they brought her back to the town clinic and again, they just prescribed her with some medicine. everything after this is blurry to me until feb 21

my mom, being the eldest, made the decision to bring lola to the hospital. she’s, rightfully, unsatisfied with the town doctor’s diagnosis and prescriptions because lola is in so much pain and her legs were still swollen and its been weeks. i was with her in the emergency room while my mom and aunt did the paper work and the staff ran tests on lola. i’m contacting my sister who was in singapore and we’d video call to entertain lola since she was very adamant - and vocal - that she did not want to be admitted to the hospital bc she was “fine.” goSh she made so many hospital staff laugh because she would always announce whenever she had to fart. after like 2 hours, we move her into a ward and my mom tells me that i’ll have to stay overnight to watch over her. i was very apprehensive of this idea. i honestly did not want to. seeing her in pain was bad enough, but the fact we were in a room with other people and she was crying out loud made me really anxious but it was final. my mom, aunt, and uncle all went back home just to have dinner and they’ll come back since lola’s doctor would be coming by to give the results and for that hour they were gone? i lost it.

lola started talking/praying out loud, asking god why she was in so much pain, asking what she had done to deserve this; and i didn’t know what to do but hold her hand and kiss her head. i couldn’t even show her i was crying. when my mom got back, i told her i cant do it and she eventually convinced my other sister to join me, who cancelled her plans for the next day. that night, i did not and could not fall asleep. after a few hours, her doctor finally came by and dropped a bomb on us. he was kind enough to talk to my mom and aunt behind the curtains in the softest voice ever while i helped the nurse with lola, but i could hear him crystal clear.

cancer of the liver.

they even momentarily walked back to lola to touch her stomach and stepped back out. i almost thought i misheard, but my mom and aunt’s expressions were too grim that it basically confirmed it. later on, my mom finally told me and explained that the antibiotics she had been taking weeks ago were too strong for her because of her lifestyle and diet. there were tumors in her liver and surgery wouldn’t do anything. i dont remember what i did aside from sketching on the journal i brought, but until i got home at 10am the next day, i did not sleep a wink.

feb 22. when i woke up at 2PM, i was told that they had lola discharged from the hospital. there was nothing we could do but try to ease the pain to the best of our abilities and wait. starting that day, i went over to lola’s house to help out with feeding her, giving her medicine, and just trying to keep her happy by randomly smiling at her when i see her looking around or dancing to no music.

feb 24. these were the early weeks of covid - ph hadn’t had a case yet, i believe, but travel restrictions were being implemented. my sister in singapore was doing everything to make sure she could come home because we don’t know when, but we know lola was leaving soon. of all the things our mom told her not to do, she cried at the entrance of the embassy and by the grace of god, someone took pity and listened to her (bc she was denied entry since she had a small cough) and she was able book a flight at midnight and be home in 4 hours. that afternoon, when i arrived at lola’s house, that was the very first time i stood at the doorway to greet her like i usually did and she didn’t smile. not even the corners of her lips moved. she was in that much pain that she couldn’t even greet me back like she always did, which was to smile and nod her head. that night, we all decided to sleepover there (with the exception of my dad since he had to feed our dogs at home). i take my usual seat in the living room and i notice a white dress that i remember (from photos) being lola’s 50th anniversary wedding gown and without being told, i know it was what she was going to wear for the very last time.

feb 25. being notoriously a late sleeper, i was about to go to sleep at 2AM when i hear lola groaning and whining out loud. when i checked her, her stubborn lil ass was trying to get out of bed alone!!! so i obviously panic and try to wake up anyone by exclaiming that lola had to go to the bathroom - she’s been wearing adult diapers for weeks now but refuses to go in them and is adamant about bringing her to the bathroom so she could relieve herself - so me, and the same aunt and uncle from the hospital, assisted her into this modified chair so she could pee and the only thing i could do was hold her hand, like always. after that, my uncle said he’d watch over her and lie down beside her on the bed so in case she needs to go again, he can take care of it himself. after falling asleep, i heard a few hours later that my sister from SG arrived. when i woke up later on, my sisters and i presented ourselves to lola bc its been so long since she last saw us complete, and this time she was able to give us a small nod of acknowledgement. i realized that none of my uncles and aunts went to work that day, thinking it was just so we could be complete since my sister was home. but then i overhear them making plans to have a priest come over for the sacrament of anointing of the sick - which based on my last and only experience (my grandfather/lolo), this must be the day. during the session, a few of my aunts and an uncle cried. my sisters cried, too, but i forced myself not to. when the priest left, i don’t know how long, but suddenly, she was gone. i didn’t know how to react. this was the second time i’ve seen someone pass away before my very eyes. everyone was crying out for forgiveness, kissing lola’s head, but i couldn’t move one bit. i was finally crying, but i couldn’t move at all.

3 days. from learning about the real problem with lola, it only took 3 days for it to take her away from us. not even a week, or a month. the only bright side to this was that she’s finally relieved of all the pain that’s been causing her suffering. 3 days of knowing her time was very, very short, but it was still a shock when she finally left.

for the longest time, lola’s goal was to reach the age of 100 because apparently our government will reward her with 100,000 pesos (like 2k usd) for doing so. she wanted to reach 100 because she wanted to leave us with some inheritance haha. and everyone believed she could do it. no one doubted her. until this happened. maybe its just me, but i feel foolish... completely stupid and ignorant for knowing deep down in my heart that she would reach 100 that losing her 3 years prior her goal hurt me more than ever.

it’s been 5 months but remembering her death still makes me cry. i have dreams (and you all know im a lucid dreamer) where she’s still alive and we’re talking about how she beat cancer at 96 in just a few months, but then i’ll remember that she didn’t and the dream in front of me just shatters and i’ll wake up empty and crying. i have never felt so much regret after she passed bc all she wanted was to see me graduate and it was up to me to show her that i got my first job and give her a portion of my first salary, but i couldn’t even do that. i waited too long and now its too late. her ideal type for me was a rich atenean boy who could drive 😂 and i still couldn’t give her that bc im so anti-men. there was a time i was so scared to go back to lola’s house bc she called me out during dinner - “baket ka malungkot/why are you sad?” - when all i was doing was browsing through my phone, scarily enough going through another “episode”, and the last person i’d ever want to know about my possible depression was her. of all my suicidal episodes, i’ve always resolved them by thinking of her - that i will continue living because i wanted to see her smile. because i wanted to see her happy.

i miss her so much. i wish i had been a better granddaughter to her. the small things i’ve done for her were never enough. in the past 5 months, i’ve only dreamt about her twice (actually being with her) and both times made the day so hard to function. i havent moved on and i dont know if im the only one. i dont know if i’ll ever move on. she would have been 97 today. whenever she forgets my name, i’ll tell her i have the same birthday as her and she’ll remember me. she’ll say “ahhh rosean! july 10!”

if someone read through this, im sorry you had to go through that mess. but thank you for hearing me out. no, i’ll thank you the way my lola would thank people, verbatim:

thank you very much from the bottom of my heart.

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ryncorrect · 4 years

Text

university!au: day6 sungjin

i’ve abandoned this au for so long istg my life is a mess yall please forgive but anyway im back with my bullshit and ready to spread my cringe-worthy stuff to the world again

name: park sungjin

major: practical music and arts

other activities: leader, guitarist, and vocalist of university band, president of music club, member of cooking club

park sungjin is the embodiment of leadership

i mean he’s the band leader, the club president, also the president of his class since year one, like he’s so trustworthy and responsible, literally nothing can go wrong under his sight

and even when things do go wrong (life is a bitch) he’ll still make sure everyone is fine and having the time of their lives pun intended

anyone who meets sungjin for the first time will probs say he has this tough man aura, cold,,, tsundere-ish idk

but as someone who have known each other for so long, you never understand when anyone says sungjin looks cold

you know damn well the moment sungjin opens his mouth he gonna throw dad jokes with his satoori dialect

dad jokes are fucking funny fight me

you once said sungjin should start his own comedy club

......he’s currently considering it

oh right he also talks about food all. the. time.

he joined cooking club for a reason okay

no, he can’t and doesn’t really cook he’s only there to taste food and people let him there because he’s nice and he knows how to appreciate the cooks

uh we love a man with manners

so, who is sungjin for you exactly?

he lives next door, one year older than you, was a leader even when you were little ayeee childhood friend cliche

can you imagine little sungjin leading his friends in game its so pure brb crying

you told him everything you couldn’t tell ur parents because they were busy, you asked for his advises, he made sure you were safe and happy

you still depend on him even after you two have grown up

you enrolled to the same university, took the same major with him, and even joined the clubs he’s a member of

this isn’t because you’re indecisive, it’s just that you spent so much of your childhood with sungjin that you two became similar to each other, up to your hobbies and interests and even palate lmao

that’s why he loves to eat with you because you two never argue about the menu

the only club you can’t join is the band, and that’s because jae rejected your application

reason: extremely close personal relationship with sungjin, therefore sungjin will take your side if we ever had an argument

you denied that; no, sungjin wont take anyone’s side based on feelings bc he’s a logical person and he always listens carefully to every side of the parties before he makes a decision..... but jae wont listen

brat

"you only rejected me because im a better guitarist”

“lalalalala cant hear you over my authority as the important band member”

“fuck you”

“i don’t accept offers”

anywayssss you did fail to join the band, but you’re friends with them, theyre literally so used to your company that sometimes they forgot youre not actually in the band

you and the guys teamed up for sungjin’s surprise birthday party

the surprise failed because dowoon accidentally added sungjin to the group chat

sungjin being nice and playing along anyway because he didnt want to disappoint you

and then its sungjin’s turn to ask the guys for help for your birthday party

failed again because dowoon AGAIN accidentally invited you, in person, to your own birthday party

dowoon what the heck?????

yeah its all cute and sweet but thats all of your relationship with sungjin, you treat him like a dependable brother and he treats you like his own little sister

thats what you tell to your friends too when they ask if you two are dating

they’re glad thats the case

because they have a crush on sungjin LMAOOOOO PLOT TWIST

they’re hoping they can get to sungjin through you yanno like asking you to send him snacks and letters or to tell him they say hi

you dont mind i mean you know sungjin is one admirable person ofc everyone likes him

sungjin never rejects nor accepts it hes just like “yay snacks!”

“god damn it sungjin just date any of them im tired of being a matchmaker”

“then dont?? literally no one asked you to”

little did you know that sungjin had the same problem

some of his classmates are interested in you but whenever they come to him he just says, “dont ask me i dont know anything and if i do i wont tell you”

this one sandeul guy has started asking you out and stuff

“ehhh youre so nice i’ll think about it!!”

you, immediately texting sungjin: ur friend sandeul ask me out what should i do

sungjin: do you like him tho

you: not really idk him yet

sungjin: just tell him your mom said no

you: damn nice

but this guy is so persistent and you gotta admit hes kinda cute and after a few tries you finally said yes to him

so you two went together and it was pretty fun

sungjin isnt too happy when he hears about it from sandeul

he asked you, “why didnt you tell me first?”

“well i dont think its a big deal. it was just a date anyway”

but you always told him everything

sungjin never speaks about it again

you go on another date with sandeul the week after

you tell sungjin later and he doesnt ask how it went

hes just “oh”

idk he’s kinda distant now, he rarely talks nor replies to your texts

he doesn't visit music club nor cooking club either so you don't see him often

have i told you im uncreative and all my aus are lame???

you think its probably because hes focusing for the finals, but even after it’s over sungjin doesnt really hang out with you or the band anymore like he only comes for practices and leaves right after

weirdly no one says anything about sungjin’s absence

but you cant stay quiet any longer and decide to ask dowoon whats wrong with sungjin

you shouldve known dowoon cant help much

“honestly i dont know either, maybe you should ask wonpil he’s sungjin’s roommate”

“but what if wonpil told sungjin”

“told sungjin what?”

“that i asked about him”

“asked him what?”

“...nevermind”

you asked younghyun

younghyun doesnt help either

“i dont know, just ask him yourself. i thought you were the closest to him??” why you so salty man

okay fine lets ask jae

“i’ll tell you for fifty bucks”

“dude im broke”

“then deal with it yourself”

you had no choice but to ask wonpil

“he’s just tired”

you know wonpil lied but this little shit refuses to tell anything

“please dont force me to answer i will cry really loudly and it’ll be embarrassing for the both of us”

why do you befriend them in the first place smh

oh youre right about wonpil telling sungjin that youre worried, and he does tell him to talk to you if he got something in mind

sungjins hesitant but in the end he only says, “no... its just that i didnt realize until recently that my little sister has grown up a lot”

“dear god wtf you sound like her grandma”

skip the boring part so uh a few more days passed awkwardly between you two and after your failed attempt at asking around you decide to confront sungjin in person

youre in the band practice room, the others are present, sungjin’s about to leave early as usual, and you find yourself jumping up your seat, “whats your problem with me?”

you know sungjin hates confrontation but you cant stand it anymore. you tried giving him time but if theres anything you seem to be more of a stranger to him

“i dont know what i did wrong and i wont know if you dont tell me, so let me know. i’ll listen and i’ll apologize if its my fault, but dont give me silent treatment like this. its so unlikely of you"

you can see sungjin clences his jaw as he replies calmly, "people change"

"you don't change, youre being childish. if you're mad you should talk about it. if you don't want me here you should tell me to go. if you don't like ME dating your friend you should tell me not to!!!"

drama much ryn

"youre your own person and you make your own choice, its your life and i cant keep telling you what to do or what not," and the end part kinda slips, "i don't hate you dating my friend or anyone, okay? im just not used yet to be a second person for you and im afraid youll get hurt"

"youre never?? a second person sungjin where does this idea even come from youre the only one for me i dont want anyone else???"

and suddenly there's a train of awkward coughs and you come back to your senses and you realize you're being watched

jae pretends to make a phone call, "mom pick me up im scared"

lame jae lame

dowoon mumbles, "can we,,, make an exit first before you two declare your undying love bc its privacy yanno"

you feel the heat spreading across your face as you open your mouth the same time as sungjin, both want to deny dowoon, but younghyun beats yall to it, "yeah you two are in love with each other we been know"

you and sungjin stares at each other, confused, "we don't???"

"oh honey,,, my dear,,, ive read enough sappy shit in writing club to see where this is going"

the conversation was cut there and neither of you bring it up again,

because the idea of you loving sungjin or sungjin loving you is so weird that you refuse to think about it, and so is for sungjin

but ever since that, sungjin has drastically come back to normal its almost hilarious, he spends a lot of time hanging out in the music club, practicing with the band, visiting the cooking club, making a joke here and there

sungjin is himself again with you, a caring dependable brother whom you come to whenever you need to talk or just hang out with and he always makes sure he has time for you

sap

you know hes always been like that but why does it feel different now??? the way he smiles or pulls your hand so youre walking on the inner side of the road,,, how he neatly places your spoon and chopsticks on a napkin when you two go out to eat together,,,, why

tender love baby chICKEN TENDER

mydayexol follow me

andddd so one day, someone asked you out. again.

wow ur so popular i cant Relate

you, texting sungjin: sandeuls friend jinyoung something invited me to a party next saturday should i come

sungjin, replying to you: hmm

you: ???

sungjin: i think its up to you

for some reason youre disappointed by his reply,,, but he’s right tho its your call if you wanna go then you go its not about what sungjin says

right?

right???

but suddenly you got another text: but if you ask for my opinion i would say don't go

you: actually i dont want to either lol so what should i say

sungjin: tell him you already have a date

you: nice

sungjin: with me

you: ayyeee

you: wait what

sungjin: i mean its just a suggestion

sungjin: which you can accept

sungin: or reject

for some reason you can imagine sungjin’s cheeky smile through his texts and it makes your inside tingles and you wanna giggle

so yea you thought it was a joke but he actually did take you out for a movie and dinner

it was really nice

so yanno the weird thing is that neither of you ask the other to be “official” but you just. are dating.

ur friends are mad like “bUT YOU SAID YOU TWO WERENT A THING”

“lol sry i changed my mind”

“fuck you”

“no thanks sungjin can do that... bUT DONT TELL SUNGJIN I SAID THAT hes gonna kill me”

“is he ur mom”

“basically yeah”

this sucks real bad but who cares

not me obviously

ill be back soon (or not) with dowoon’s one lets hope i can do better than this dnsjfsndfj lnjajnfdjs lmAO I LOVE YALL AND HAPPY NEW YEAR IN ADVANCE

#day6 #sungjin #park sungjin #day6 imagines #day6 scenarios #day6 fanfic #day6 reactions #kpop imagines #kpop scenarios #kpop reactions #im sorry sungjin #ive put this on hold for too long i already forgot what i wanted to write in the first place #bye

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autisticstarseed · 4 years

Text

👐 Hand washing guide when you have sensory issues 👐

tbh. we shouldve been talking abt this a long time ago for many disabled ppls sake but ive put this post off for like a million years out of pure solidified fear of ableist harassment/kneejerk ignorance and also generalized cringe idiots but now that we got so much covid-19 fear and autistic ppl actually tend to have weaker immune systems than most people lets jump the shark;;;

i have autism and i physically struggle with washing my hands as often as i want to, having wet hands, drying them, the temperature difference, bad soap smells/textures, etc. are all genuinely painful. the good news is that ive dealt with water aversion shit since birth (its a common sensory issue), so ive had time to figure out alternatives and coping skills that still help reduce risk of disease and spreading it in ways that i can personally manage. (ie. not lazy or selfish or gross. genuinely putting more effort into this every day task than most other people would even think about. just disability lads) so heres the guide i have to offer if you’re in a similar boat, with some keypoints about hand hygiene and tips addressing the most common sensory struggles ive noticed with it;;;

1. hand sanitizer

i love hand sanitizer, i can get it in almost any scent i want and it dries down very very fast. the problem is; hand washing and hand sanitizer do different things. it only kills certain types of germs. which is all fine and dandy, but because of this, using only hand sanitizer wont actually keep you from catching or spreading many illnesses. so what its good for is times you cant wash your hands (out in public, sensory overload, no spoons, etc), thats fine, but it should not replace all hand washing if at all possible. it is supposedly effective to covid-19, but so little is currently known that it should not be considered your go to for this, and the only unanimous statement straight from the CDC is that hand washing works best at preventing its spread.

temperature - if you have trouble with it being too cold, conveniently keeping it in your pocket or closely against your body in some way warms it up and makes it much more comfortable.

scent - they come in almost any scent you can imagine, but if you have trouble with strong scents, there are ‘scentless hand sanitizers’. they usually have a faint chemical smell, so if there are any testers available, you should check to make sure it can work for you before you buy it.

texture - if gel doesnt cut it, they also make foamy hand sanitizers and liquid sprays, but theyre harder to find and might be a little more pricey.

and remember; always buy hand sanitizer that says it contains AT LEAST 60% alcohol, the higher alcohol content the better, but try to keep track of how high it is and how much you apply it so you dont dry your skin out. and right now price gouging is pretty bad, so dont be surprised if you cant find any for a while, and dont buy any small bottle that costs over a couple dollars, its a rip off.

2. hand washing

so what does hand washing do thats better than sanitizer??? soap and water lift up the dirt and oils that are carrying the germs and actually wash them off, and not only that, it also gets rid of all the things sanitizer cant, such as dust/dirt, spores, chemicals, and the previously mentioned viruses that are harder to kill. ik to an outside perspective it might not seem that hard, but obviously when you have autism and these tasks are split down into bigger ordeals and sensory nightmares, it can feel impossible.

soap - there are so many different kinds of soap! scentless soaps exist, and they very rarely have any lingering chemical smell! theres also soap for sensitive skin, and baby soap also works well for that issue. bar soaps can come in all different shapes and sizes, with many different ingredients and additives to choose from (independent soap makers are an amazing source for customized soap btw), and liquid soaps can be pure gel, frothy, mousse-y or even have tiny exfoliating or moisturizing beads in them if thats a sensory experience you enjoy. this is my number one rec for people struggling with hand washing bc of sensory issues;;; mix up the soap. finding one that gives you an okay or even a GOOD sensory experience can completely turn around an otherwise meltdown inducing task

temperature - this is the one thats always been hardest for me. cold water straight up hurts me, and our plumbing is Terrible, so the trick i have for slow pipes is to run the hot water on high as Soon as i get into the bathroom. leave it going and by the time you’re done there should be at least lukewarm water. if this still takes too long for you, try out the various sinks in your house, usually one is able to get hot water faster than the rest (for me its the kitchen sink) and that can become a designated station for you if need be.

texture - some ppl just hate water. if thats the case, it rly doesnt change much abt the process if you use less water, ie work the soap into a lather, and then only use as much as you need to rinse it off. you dont have to keep your hands under the whole time, the soap clings to the dirt, the water takes it off all together, as long as you scrub well and rinse till you see no suds, you’re good

If it really comes down to it, a washcloth with water+soap, a disinfecting wipe, or even literally just a rinse with plain ol water is better than nothing, but the stream of water and act of rubbing the soap in is the most effective combo against disease. soap/disinfectant wipes and hand sanitizers are your second best option. if theres a time in your life where an issue is so disabling for you that you truly cant keep any of this up, rly the most important thing is to limit your direct physical contact with your face and commonly used objects as MUCH as possible until you can figure smth out. (you kno those old ladies that grab a wipe and open the doorknob with it between their hand and the knob? become that old lady) and if push comes to shove, if a safe and accepting therapy setting is something accessible to you, hygiene struggles are actually something many mental health professionals understand Very well and can help you cope with personally and directly, without shame.

3. hand drying

this is also. my personal hell. and what most people say is the hardest part of the sensory experience. but ya cant just walk around with wet hands right

towels - the obvious choice for most, but to me they actually dont dry enough. i always end up damp and with lint stuck to me. this kills the man. but hand towels do have some variety to them, you can find em with really long fibers or really short/flat, really fuzzy or really stiff, etc. sounds silly but its smth a lot of ppl dont think about that can change a lot. you can also try super absorbent towels (yes like a shamwow), and again baby bath towels are also an option if you want something gentle.

paper towels - yeah a little more wasteful and expensive, but imo much more absorbent. theyre also pretty thin so you can get between your fingers (MY BANE), and under your nails if you use a corner. 10/10

blow drying - ik this is the kind of shit you only see in like movie theaters and malls and they are definitely LOUD AS SHIT, but if you happen to have the money, and struggle more with Textures than Noise, ie a stream of warm air seems worth the sound, you Can actually find a small basic one of these items for your own home.

4. public restrooms

everybody hates em!!! but you can make em more tolerable;;;

soap - bring your own! little travel soaps you can keep in your bag are a godsend for ppl with sensory issues, sensitive skin/allergies, and if you just prefer not sharing soap.

temperature - most public places i notice actually do get hot water pretty fast (like,,, too fast,,, like,,, it bur ns me) so if there are no faucets and its too hot or too cold, once again you can try different sinks and one might be more comfortable. if there are faucets i recommend grabbing a paper towel to turn it off, so you dont have to touch it again with your clean hands.

sound - WHY R AUTOMTIC FLUSH TOILETS SO FUCKEN LOUDD..... honestly if you have noise cancelling earmuffs or earplugs or w/e pop em in. if you dont have any of that i just literally plug my ears with my fingers when i stand up. if you struggle with the sound of the blow dryers, they almost always have paper towels as well, but its a great idea to carry something like that around in your bag with you just in case. if its really packed and people chattering is getting to you, sometimes the ‘family’ bathrooms are actually smaller and less full. if its bad enough and you feel comfortable asking, an employee might be able to direct you to a single stall bathroom or at least a different one than that.

and though its convenient, try not to use your sleeve to touch things like doorknobs, toilet handles, etc. instead use something disposable like a paper towel or wipe, bc the germs will simply transfer to your sleeve and still risk infecting you.

5. schedule

the number one suggestion is to wash your hands literally as often as possible during a time like this but like. even for allistic/nt/abled/ ppl thats just not always an attainable schedule so the Best times to wash your hands are;;;

after using the bathroom - the most important time and generally the easiest to get used to. its smth you have to do multiple times a day that already has a schedule, and if you were to forget or go into sensory overload its usually immediately accessible as soon as you can. as i mentioned earlier, if you need help remembering, you can turn the water on when you first get in and leave it going.

the doctors - ANY KIND of health facility should be avoided right now unless really necessary, places where sick people would frequent is the quickest way to get sick but like. ya rly cant help it sometimes right. you cant stop dealing with your own illnesses just bc theres another one floating around. so, this is time to go apeshit on the handwashing. if your health issue involves coughing and sneezing, ask for a face mask. bring a scarf in case they dont have any, its not as great but better than nothing. otherwise, you honestly dont need it, face masks are more for these people bc they keep germs in better than out. whether you’re worried abt getting sick or infecting others, this is a time to use hand sanitizer, avoid physical contact like shaking hands [autistic cheering], and when you first arrive and right before you go to leave are the most important times to remember to wash your hands.

preparing food - not as commonly spoken about, but also easy to work into a schedule. i personally dont care unless its food for somebody else or if im going to be putting my hands on it a lot, but if thats the case, a lot of the time thats produce you already want to wash in the sink, so you can kill two birds with one stone there. dont just get the germs off your own hands, get em off the fruits and veggies before you eat em. carpool

after grocery shopping - not very common. most ppl just slap some sanitizer/a wipe on there or dont think abt it at all, but if you just got home from walmart thats a great time to wash. you just touched a bunch of items other people touched, including the cart, money/credit cards, and all the products people will pick up and put back, so its prime germ time babey. But again, sanitizer or a wipe will help if its all you can manage after a trip out like that.

before self care - also uncommon. ppl always say ‘dont touch your face’ and ‘apply this product with clean hands’, and what they mean is that one of the fastest ways germs get into your system is through your mouth, nose, eyes and ears. if you’re simply washing your face theres not as much concern, but applying a mask, moisturizer, makeup, etc. should all be done after a gentle rinse of your hands (and face). very hard to get into the schedule of, but if you consider it a Part of your ‘self care’ or use a special fun cleanser, it can stick a little easier.

6. stim items

STIM ITEMS!! if you have stim items, its a good idea to clean them regularly, but even moreso during an outbreak like this.

rubber/plastic - if it goes in your mouth, hot water (not hot enough to melt!) and dish soap, if it doesnt, look up how to safely make a diluted bleach solution.

silicone - silicone is usually dish washer safe.

fabric - if its light, add bleach to the washing machine, if its colored, you can use white vinegar or hydrogen peroxide which are less likely to discolor any dyes. lysol detergent is also super great. small items you’re worried about losing, or items with details/loose parts, you can usually wash inside of a sealed pillow case.

‘squishies’ - for ‘mochi’ squishies aka the rubbery ones, soap and water + some dusted baby powder or corn starch (optional) to keep it from grabbing lint for a while. for foam squishies, they can rarely be deep cleaned without the risk of growing mold or taking paint off, but a disinfecting wipe every now and then should keep it clean for a while.

slime - cant be disinfected, sorry. also a breeding ground for mold if you arent careful, so its always best to cycle through these quickly.

technology - cant really be completely sterilized, but there are many places to get sprays and cleaning wipes for the devices you use that can at least keep the areas your hands frequently touch a little cleaner.

BUT of course if your item comes with instructions on how to wash it, always follow that instead. this is just a general idea.

and as a final note;;; disabled ppl should not feel guilty or dirty for struggling with this. like. man idc abt ur cringe feels or your ignorant blame or your lack of understanding/sympathy for what goes into these tasks for us. if u dont wanna get our struggles and sensitivities when we’re working twice as hard on functioning tasks which personal ease you take for granted, thats on you. @ disabled people if you struggle with maintaining the same standard of hygiene as nts you arent gross or bad fucking person, you’re disabled and by definition that means your level of functioning will be different, and you deserve sympathy. its just that germs dont discriminate, they wanna cause problems for everybody involved (especially you!!!), so Anything you can manage is Great and if anything from this post can help make it a little easier for people in any way, i feel its absolutely necessary to talk about with respect and dignity. people with autism/adhd/sensory processing disorder/similar neurodivergencies/literally anybody else this could benefit, pls feel free to add on any tips you might have or send me questions. let disabled ppl help disabled ppl do our personal bests

#nt/allistic ppl can totally reblog btw!! just dont clown like thats literally all i ask man cuz tbh #im trying to help ppl form a hygiene habit while my nd struggle was ignored and worsened by ppl being shitty to me so to be blunt ig #im helping people by giving alternatives and coping skills and all ur doing is being ableist and expecting ppl to 100% conform so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯#whos really the ...~~~~~ pro recovery~~~~ one. here #hint its me sit down rude ass #long post #im scared to put in nd tags but sjgsjddsj we're JUMPIGN THE SHARK #sensory processing disorder #spd #autism #actuallyautistic #asd #adhd #sensory overload #original

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hcneysoaked · 3 years

Note

💘 with bev so we can pretend everything is fine <3

send me 💘 + A SHIP and i’ll tell you—

where they first met and how aha mental breakdowns outside of bev’s job </3 definitely called for some immediate bonding, definitely influences the sort of dynamic they end up having throughout too

how long their ‘flirting’ phase was before feelings got involved no flirting just terrible pining <3 well like some flirting maybe on eli’s part, but he definitely cuts back after the Initial Fuck Up ™ and it’s all replaced anyway with good old quiet pining

who fell for who first ( if applicable ) based on how things have been going definitely bev :((( it takes eli a while i think to figure out how he feels but he’ll get the re

where their first date was and what it was like ooo okay eli would definitely want to make it all up to bev and maybe actually have something planned out for once, but it’d be something lowkey…. dinner + something else that i cant come up with rn bgfkj but it’d go over better than either of them would expect i think, a good start

who asks who out and how ( with a sign? spelled out on a cake? just a simple ‘will you go out with me’? ) after it all starts to get worked out… things would likely still be a little tentative for a while, but with less tension… i think it might come as a little suggestion from eli that maybe they could try and give it another shot but not without a lot of reassurnace that’s he’s not just fucking around again

who proposes first wil d i’m not sure gbdfjkg i dont know if they would?? unless he sees its something bev seems to want, then i don’t think eli would totally considering making that move, but if she does then he’d absolutely make the effort and he wouldn’t say no to her either gbfjkdf

if they keep / kept their relationship secret or let everyone know right away mmm no one to really keep it a secret from i think?? well eli likes to keep things lowkey at first from like friends/family mostly bc he has a terrible relationship track record and doesn't want them getting on his case BUT…. it wouldn’t be bc of bev or anything

where the proposal happens and how ( kiss cam at a baseball game? on a hillside surrounded by ducks? at a disney park? ) not to talk abt stargazing again but…… can u Picture it

if they adopt any pets together unless he is physically restrained then every universe has eli bringing a cat home at Some Point

who’s more dominant I feel like its safe to say eli gfdkfg though he’s not normally, he’s just stubborn and pushy

where their first kiss was and what it was like :((( probably during the first date? but like not til the very end and they’re like parting ways, and it’s really tentative and careful and maybe they kinda just go for it bc they wanna make sure they at least do this in case it doesn’t end up working out again

if they have any matching couples stuff ( mugs? sweaters? pillowcases? ) omg wa it the little star necklace :(( maybe not that exactly, but like something small like that, or like a little ring or something :(

how into pda they are eli is very much into pda, he’s a clingy baby, but I can see him toning it down a bit, especially towards the beginning again. they’re hand hold-y for sure, like smaller scale pda

who holds the umbrella when it rains eli bc Height but also bc he’s stubborn and likes doing little stuff like that for them

where their usual ‘date spot’ is ( if applicable ) stargazing spot!!!! it's always the lil late night picnic

who’s more protective eli is definitely crazy protective of bev, very quick to defend and quicker to try and fight anything that upsets them

how long it is before they sleep together ( can be as in ‘had sex’ or as in ‘shared a bed’ ) eli has no qualms over sharing his bed with friends so that could've happened already, but he’d be even clingier after they start dating. anything more might take a little bit to happen, but mostly bc i imagine they’d kinda try to take things slow

if they argue about anything neither of them are too keen on addressing conflict i think which probably isnt great in the long run gbdkfgdg but i dont think they’d linger too much on small things so any arguments are rare

who leaves more marks ( lipstick, hickeys, scratchmarks etc. ) probably eli jgnfdngd Possesive

who steals whose clothes and how often mmm i can see them both doing it, eli has no issues helping himself to bev’s closet unless they say something against it and i can see bev probably wearing little things around eli’s place

how they cuddle ( spooning? facing each other? ) I think eli likes to hold on to bev, doesn’t matter how they’re positioned bgjdg

what their favourite nonsexual activity is I will Refrain from repeating the same thing yet again bu t i feel like they might be the type to go around for little late night drives you know? like going nowhere in particular, just talking and listening

how long they stay mad at each other mmm i dont think they’d stay mad for very long, especially given that i don’t think’d butt heads too much to begin with?

what their usual coffee / tea orders are mmm maybe sweeter leaning drinks, go for those holidays ones bgkdf

if they ever have any children together maybe….. maybe not…. but their kids would have a nice balance with both of them bgdfkj

if they have any special pet names for each other eli would absolutely shower bev in little pet names and terms of endearment he loves that kind of shit and would absolutely die if they use any of them in return

if they ever split up and / or get back together they had that sort of together point at the beginning and then that break after before they Actually date but on from that, I don’t think they’d be on/off again just bc that bit cause enough angst as it was for them

what their shared living space is like ( messy? clean? what kind of decor? ) like a lived in kinda messy, vaguely organized and not too much of a disaster with little knick knacks they get together to decorate

what their first christmas / hanukkah / etc as a couple was like mmm i dont think eli would wanna leave bev on their own so he would at least offer to bring them to his family’s bc they’d throw a fit if he tried to skip gbfdkg and hopefully that goes over better than he’d expect

what their names are in each other’s phones a rotation of lil pet names probably followed by a string of little emojis

if they have any ‘couple traditions’ ( buying a new mug for their collection every year? baking every friday evening? ) the stargazing!!! always!!! at least every other week, good clearing your mind activity!!

who falls asleep first and who wakes up first I wanna say bev falls asleep first just bc eli tends to stay up really late and they might wake up first too, but probably depends on what theyre doing??

who’s the big spoon / little spoon eli might default to big spoon bc Big and again he just likes clinging to bev <33

who hogs the bathroom mm depends, but eli can spend forever in there making sure he at least Looks put together gfkd

who kills the spiders / takes them outside they both seem like the take spider outside kinda person kgdjf

#answered.#i um love them and i want everything to work out for them so ba d #&& beverly.#tiltedsun

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molusca · 4 years

Text

50 Questions You’ve Never Been Asked

tagged by @yuiaka ty!! <3

1. What is the color of your hairbrush?: black and red

2. Name a food you never eat?: onions. i fucking hate onions, dont put onions in my mouth unless u want me to throw up

3. Are you typically too warm or too cold?: too warm i guess

4. What were you doing 45 minutes ago?: finishing my coffee and getting ready to clean the cup the demons broke in my room in the middle of the night

5. What is your favorite candy bar?: shot (that one with peanuts or something)

6. Have you ever been to a professional sports event?: nope

7. What is the last thing you said out loud?: "after i finish the milk i will put the broken glass in the box, dont worry im not stupid” to my mom bc she though i was putting glass in the normal trash

8. What is your favorite ice cream?: that blue one that honestly idk what the fuck is that flavor but im a kingdom hearts fangirl sooo. blue icecream

9. What was the last thing you had to drink?: coffee with a bit of milk bc im a baby and cant drink pure coffee

10. Do you like your wallet?: yeah, its pink and hello kitty. cute

11. What was the last thing you ate?: french fries last night

12. Did you buy any new clothes last weekend?: nah

13. The last sporting event you watched?: does haikyuu count?

14. What is your favorite flavor of popcorn?: dont like popcorn

15. Who is the last person you sent a text message to?: my bf

16. Ever go camping?: nope

17. Do you take vitamins?: ive been taking vitamin d for a while

18. Do you go to church every Sunday?: i stopped going to church years ago

19. Do you have a tan?: when we arent in quarentine i usually have a bit of tan in my arms

20. Do you prefer Chinese food or pizza?: pizza!!!!!!

21. Do you drink your soda with a straw?: nope

22. What color socks do you usually wear?: i never use the same socks since the day in my last year of high school where i couldnt find the pair, so i went with a different sock in each foot and some friends noticed so i decided Well That’s My Thing Now. so when i wear socks (only when i have to get out of the house bc i hate using shoes), i wear a different one in each foot. i have some plain white ones (very very dirty) and a bunch of colored ones, so its always a mix of everything. i have some very fluffy and cute ones for winter, but winter lasts like a month here so i dont use it much lol

23. Do you ever drive above the speed limit?: i cant drive im bi

24. What terrifies you?: spiders, the things i hear in the middle of the night, someone breaking in the house (im very paranoid of this idk why)

25. Look to your left, what do you see?: my bed (a fucking mess), my calendar in the wall thats still on march, plastic weapons i like to play with, my small aquarium at the side of my bed

26. What chore do you hate?: all of them

27. What do you think of when you hear an Australian accent?: i dont think ive ever heard it? idk much about accents

28. What’s your favorite soda?: fanta orange

29. Do you go in a fast food place or just hit the drive-thrus?: go in the fast food, i dont have a car for drive thrus

30. Who’s the last person you talked to?: mom

31. Favorite cut of beef?: idk i just like beef

32. Last song you listened to?: love me or leave me - little mix

33. Last book you read?: i finished noite na taverna (no im not looking for the english title even if theres one) and now im reading one of conan doyle sherlock holmes stuff (too lazy to search the title too, in portuguese its vale do terror). if fanfic counts im reading tons of valdangelo lately

34. Favorite day of the week?: uhh saturday i guess

35. Can you say the alphabet backwards?: i cant even say it in normal order. no joke

36. How do you like your coffee?: with a bit of milk (something like 1/4 of milk i guess?) and three spoons of suger

37. Favorite pair of shoes?: none. i hate shoes

38. The time you normally go to sleep?: i get in bed at 9pm, when i sleep totally depends of the mood

39. The time you normally get up?: normally its 6am, but now that im not having classes i just woke up and turn off the alarm and get up when my parents leave the house to work (around 6:45am)

40. What do you prefer, sunrise or sunsets?: sunsets

41. How many blankets on your bed?: three but im only using two

42. Describe your kitchen plates: its brown

43. Do you have a favorite alcoholic beverage?: nope i hate alcohol

44. Do you play cards?: its very very rare and i dont remember the rules for anything

45. What color is your car?: i dont have a car

46. Can you change a tire?: is there a youtube tutorial for it? lol maybe if i tried

47. Your favorite province?: the fuck is a province

48. Favorite job you’ve ever had?: the only “job” i had is working in the fish lab i work and its nice and fun

49. How did you get your biggest scar?: self harm during the entire high school im not gonna elaborate on that

50. What did you do today that made someone else happy?: i woke up like an hour ago so nothing lol. usually nothing i do make other people happy anyway

im too lazy to tag but @ anyone who sees this, do it its fun

#tagged #ty <3

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allmymuseinspo · 4 years

Note

rl 💘 + A SHIP

where they first met and how

They met when they were tiny lil babies. I feel like they probably met each other pretty young but they weren’t betrothed until they were about eight. I don’t even know how they met – probably some sort of function or something

how long their ‘flirting’ phase was before feelings got involved

They were best friends for years and years before either of them realized they had feelings for each other. They were fifteen when they realized? So I want to say they probably started becoming like unintentionally flirty for a year or so before? They were always super super touchy and stuff, and I think they both had crushes on each other that came and passed until they actually started having feelings

who fell for who first ( if applicable )

I think it probably happened at similar times, but maybe first for Reg? He was definitely the one who accepted it first lool

where their first date was and what it was like

LMAO ummm do they go on dates? I don’t feel like they’ve ever gone out on a proper date date it’s always just like them hanging out like they’ve always done?

who asks who out and how ( with a sign? spelled out on a cake? just a simple ‘will you go out with me’? )

Can you imagine if one of them did that? No, they kissed that first time, then didn’t talk for months and she tried to do everything she could to prove that she didn’t care about him, and then… yeah. I think they made up and just started making out

who proposes first

Neither! They’ve been betrothed since they were children so sadly there was never like a proposal proposal. But Reg is the one to suggest they like move forward with the wedding

if they keep / kept their relationship secret or let everyone know right away

They stupidly kept it a secret for five minutes because pressureeeee but like lmao everyone knew

where the proposal happens and how ( kiss cam at a baseball game? on a hillside surrounded by ducks? at a disney park? )

Again, not applicable for them sadly

if they adopt any pets together

If they ever do it’s because the kids realllllyyyyy want one, I’m not sure if that’d ever happen tho. Maybe

who’s more dominant

Ummm I think it’s pretty even? Maybe Reg?

where their first kiss was and what it was like

It was in the quidditch locker room and Reg had just given her this new broom and she kissed him. It was cute but very awkward

if they have any matching couples stuff ( mugs? sweaters? pillowcases? )

Lmao def not

how into pda they are

Not very – maybe only super rarely and that’s mostly because of Reg. I don’t think she’d really mind

who holds the umbrella when it rains

Reg. He’s too tall

where their usual ‘date spot’ is ( if applicable )

Damn, idk. Lowkey I want to say their flat in Italy LMAO not a date spot

who’s more protective

I think they’re both pretty equal as they’ve both done stupidly protective things.

how long it is before they sleep together ( can be as in ‘had sex’ or as in ‘shared a bed’ )

I think it was about a year that they were together before they slept together? Or near that

if they argue about anything

Lmfao they argue quite a bit but it’s usually just bickering things. They have their big fights and they’re just very bad at stopping before things get to a point where it’s going to take a while to fix things. They’re both just very hot tempered and they’re shit at dealing with conflict

who leaves more marks ( lipstick, hickeys, scratchmarks etc. )

Oh, Lucinda. 100%

who steals whose clothes and how often

She totally steals his clothes all the time

how they cuddle ( spooning? facing each other? )

They’re big spooners. She’s usually little spoon but sometimes they switch – rarely but sometimes

what their favourite nonsexual activity is

Lmfao quidditch

how long they stay mad at each other

Sigh it really depends. It can be a few minutes or it can literally be like months. They really need to work on that shit

what their usual coffee / tea orders are

Straight up do not know regs coffee order. Luce is like a latte kinda girl

if they ever have any children together

So many fucking children. She’s pregnant with their twins now; Ophelia and Aramas (although she does not know they’re twins), then they have Celeste and Cassiopeia just a few months apart, and then literally like fifteen years later decide they want some more kids and actively try to get pregnant again and surprise!! More twins. This time boys. They dont have names bc we’re v bad at boy names

if they have any special pet names for each other

Ehhhh, not really. He calls her love sometimes but rarely

if they ever split up and / or get back together

Dont even talk to me about this. Yes. a few times. I hate them.

what their shared living space is like ( messy? clean? what kind of decor? )

I feel like it’s v clean and neat and organized. Probs v chic because they both prefer a modern vibe (which i dont get but you do you, guys)

what their first christmas / hanukkah / etc as a couple was like

Ahhhh a terrible one. Her dad died like two weeks before christmas good times good times

what their names are in each other’s phones

Just Luce and Reg. she has a heart but that’s about it

if they have any ‘couple traditions’ ( buying a new mug for their collection every year? baking every friday evening? )

They’re v supportive of each other so like reg will always come to her matches and cheer for her, they eventually really make quidditch their thing and like buy a fucking team. They travel together a lot, and rarely spend much time in a singular home as they’re always switching things up.

who falls asleep first and who wakes up first

I think she falls asleep first but he also probs wakes up first

who’s the big spoon / little spoon

Reg is big spoon and luce is little spoon (usually)

who hogs the bathroom

Lmfao lowkey reg

who kills the spiders / takes them outside

He’s gotta do it im sorry she wont

@musingsbyannabelle

#a #musingsbyannabelle #gold leaf across your lips ︱Regulus & Lucinda #i crave the balm of beautiful & soft things ︱Lucinda Talkalot #julia writes on occasion

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cuilective · 4 years

Text

RULES: REPOST, DON’T REBLOG. JUST PICK A MUSE OF YOURS AND FILL IT OUT.

—

MUSE: Lester Merriton

BASICS

▸ IS YOUR MUSE TALL/SHORT/AVERAGE?

Tall, definitely. Used to be even an inch or so taller before the explosion.

▸ ARE THEY OKAY WITH THEIR HEIGHT?

For the most part. He can reach things others can’t, but he’s doomed to be the big spoon forever unless he finds someone who’ll settle for backpacking. Could be worse.

▸ WHAT’S THEIR HAIR LIKE?

When he’s staying on top of self care, I’d say it’s... pretty average? nothing super soft but at least it’s clean. probably smells like some generic Manly Scented Shampoo For Men like woodsmoke or gym shower jungle juice or whatever the heck it is guys have to wear instead of fruity floral goodness. or just the OG old spice, that seems pretty lester to me.

▸ DO THEY SPEND A LOT OF TIME ON THEIR HAIR/WITH THEIR GROOMING?

The least amount of time possible while still getting everything done. He’d rather be doing just about anything else than like... brushing his hair. soaking in the tub. hell even a nap would be more entertaining.

▸ DOES YOUR MUSE CARE ABOUT THEIR APPEARANCE?

He does, which is probably one of the only things to really motivate him to take care of himself.

▸ DOES YOUR MUSE CARE ABOUT WHAT OTHERS THINK ABOUT THEM?

More than he lets on, definitely more than he’ll ever admit. He bottles it up pretty well but if he feels like he made a bad impression on someone it might bother him for a while.

PREFERENCES

▸ INDOORS OR OUTDOORS?

Indoooors

▸ RAIN OR SUNSHINE?

Rain. Nothing better than working by a window listening to the rain pitter patter against the glass. It’s the best white noise to fill the silence so he can focus on something other than his grumpy brain noises.

▸ FOREST OR BEACH?

Neither, but if he had to choose it’d be forest. You know how hard it is to get sand out of all the nooks n crannies of prosthetics? Ain’t nobody got time for that.

▸ PRECIOUS METALS OR GEMS?

Metals for sure, precious or not. Way more practical uses and still looks good.

▸ FLOWERS OR PERFUMES?

Ehhhhh, maybe flowers? At least it’d be less overwhelming than straight up perfume.

▸ PERSONALITY OR APPEARANCE?

He’d say both, but honestly??? Appearance.

▸ BEING ALONE OR BEING IN A CROWD?

Alone, definitely. Or at least being alone with someone else or a very small group of friends, even if they’re just sitting around in the same room but not actually interacting.

▸ ORDER OR ANARCHY?

Ornarchy. Anorder. Uh. Uhhhhh. Order?

▸ PAINFUL TRUTHS OR WHITE LIES?

Well he dishes out both fairly often. It’s hard to tell when he’s being brutally honest because he genuinely cares or just feels like being a jerk.

▸ SCIENCE OR MAGIC?

Science all the way every day

▸ PEACE OR CONFLICT?

He’d say he prefers peace but ultimately conflict is what he’s most familiar with. It’s practically his comfort zone.

▸ NIGHT OR DAY?

Night, for sure.

▸ DUSK OR DAWN?

Dawn, sort of. Nothing like staying up so late you can watch the sunrise... and then go right to sleep.

▸ WARMTH OR COLD?

Warmth. Warm drinks, warm clothes, warm touches. Even just all the computers buzzing away in his lab working like little space heaters to toast up the whole room a few degrees.

▸ MANY ACQUAINTANCES OR A FEW CLOSE FRIENDS?

He’d sure like to have a few close friends but they keep like, exploding or falling into other dimensions and he just cant take that kind of abandonment anymore.

▸ READING OR PLAYING A GAME?

Playing a game. He reads enough for work, it’s nice to do something less mentally taxing. Fun colors and shapes, puzzles, whatever. Really likes word cross apps on his phone.

QUESTIONNAIRE

▸ WHAT ARE SOME OF YOUR MUSE’S BAD HABITS?

Entirely too sarcastic at all times, even with people he doesn’t actively dislike. It’s a roast or be roasted world out there.

▸ HAS YOUR MUSE LOST ANYONE CLOSE TO THEM? HOW HAS IT AFFECTED THEM?

Bit complicated. He wasn’t close to his parents. He became more distant from his younger brother for some time before the explosion that killed him. His relationship with Freddy was always rather complicated, but when he and his wife and daughter vanished it affected Lester more than he realized. He began to more actively isolate himself, more sarcastic, and in general puts no effort into friendships because he feels it’ll just be a wasted investment anyway. The hardest thing for him though was after he recovered from the explosion and could live on his own again and finding out Frederick Senior McJerklord essentially abandoned Lester’s nephew in the middle of who-knows-where with a grumpy giraffe because he didn’t want to raise a Merriton since they’re all competition anyway.

▸ WHAT ARE SOME FOND MEMORIES YOUR MUSE HAS?

He’s not much of a hugger himself but he can probably remember when and where he ever experienced each hug he’s ever had and treasures each one. Bruh just wants 2 be held, man.

▸ IS IT EASY FOR YOUR MUSE TO KILL?

Kill the mood? Sure. Kill a living being? It’d be pretty tough. There is one instance he might be able to kill and get through it without having a mental and moral breakdown, but he tries not to think about it too much or he might start making plans.

▸ WHAT’S IT LIKE WHEN YOUR MUSE BREAKS DOWN?

It’s eerily quiet. Like you know how snow absorbs all the sound in the universe??? It’s kind of like that except the silence isn’t peaceful at all it’s just like sheer unease. Like the silence of a morgue. He avoids eye contact bc honestly if people can see his eyes at times like that they’d start asking concerned questions that he just can’t answer without risking falling apart. he’s a silent, angry crier the rare occasions he does cry. could be quietly going about his business and keeps accidentally breaking things bc he is just full of smadness.

▸ IS YOUR MUSE CAPABLE OF TRUSTING SOMEONE WITH THEIR LIFE?

he can’t even trust himself with his life, let alone someone else.

▸ WHAT’S YOUR MUSE LIKE WHEN THEY’RE IN LOVE?

Still sarcastic, but in a much sappier way. If anything the roasting will just get worse, but in return you get glimpses of those itty bitty smiles and airy chuckles. He gets marginally more touchy-feely; a hand on the shoulder, sitting a smidge closer than usual, just wanting to be closer in general. may or may not bluntly admit to wanting more spicy contact when least expected. like ur just tryna go grocery shopping and yall be lookin at the tomatoes n he just stares at a tomato in his hand w a straight face like ‘once we’re back home we should smash’ all nonchalantly except not in those words exactly because i dont want to get any more gross bots following me

—

tagged by: @streetsteel

tagging: hmmmmmmm.... whoever wants to and hasnt yet?? idk man go bonkers

#Lester || HC #Dash Meme

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notwxrriors · 5 years

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Im so sorry if this is too much but Jawff is so underappreciated and I thought youd have fun with these: 1, 6, 7, 8, 18, 27, 28, 29, 36, 37, 40, 41, 45

ur SO RIGHT on both things,,,,jawff is god tier and i ADORE THEM and i love doing these

1. How do they fall asleep? Wake up? Any daily rituals?

jawn likes being the big spoon, wrapping his arms around geoff and holding him as close as he can, leg over geoff’s hip. by morning they’re always in some tangle of limbs, and whoever wakes first kisses the other one awake and it’s VERY SWEET

6. Any tasks that are always left to one person?

of course, any and all photography things go straight to jawn, even silly things like taking photos of the sunset geoff wants to remember, or flowers they see on their walk that geoff finds particularly pretty. he always gives jawn his phone and asks if jawn will take photos of them, and jawn thinks it’s a little funny but he always does

7. What annoys them the most about their partner? Would they change it if they could?

for geoff, it’s jawn always staining the whole bathroom red every time he redyes his hair, even when he’s trying super hard to not. for jawn, geoff’s pretty frequently late to things (and makes jawn late, in turn), and it drives jawn fckn crazy

8.What do the like best about their partner?

geoff loves jawn’s hair (despite the mess he makes) and jawn’s voice. he could listen to jawn talk all day long and never get tired of it. he also admires jawn’s talent, is constantly in awe of jawn’s videos and photos. jawn loves geoff’s hands and his eyes - he can never seem to capture how blue they are, just how beautiful. also, he loves watch geoff on stage, how free he is up there

18. What are their dates like? How long do/did they date? Do they ever feel the need to take a break from each other?

they take a lot of walks together, hand in hand, things that give them time to talk idly and enjoy each others company. stargazing is another favorite one, driving far away from the lights of houston and laying a blanket out in some field, laying together under the stars. they date a looong time before they get married, 5+ yrs. i’m sure they go through rough patches, times when things are hard, and maybe take a break but it only lasts like a week bc theyre whipped for one another

27. Do they have kids? Grow old together? Split up?

they have at least a kid, if not a few !!! geoff’s always wanted to be a dad and it’s an idea jawn shares after a few yrs of marriage. and u knOW they grow old together and have grandchildren and 😭😭😭

28.What are their vacations like?

aWW really sweet, they don’t tend to go far, usually just roadtrips to a few states over to get to a decent beach. it’s nice, to spend time together away from houston, and roadtrips together are always so fun, they always choose it over flying

29. How do the handle disasters or emergencies? Minor injuries? Sickness?

neither handle disasters/emergencies very well, both are prone to being very panicky but they try to keep the other calm the best they can. jawn rarely gets injured, but when geoff broke his wrist, jawn was SO concerned for him and tried to held any way he could. it’s a very caring relationship in general which is only reinforced when one of them is sick, the other taking care of them the best they can

36. What’s their greatest strength as a couple? Their weakness?

they’re just !! very good, very and supportive and loving. they bring each other so much joy and it’s easy to see. weakness is probably avoidant of conflict, neither of them like to bring up issues but ultimately end up having to

37.How much would they be willing to sacrifice for the other? Any lines they refuse to cross?

ah this is Such a Question,,, i dont want to cop-out on it but i genuinely think they’re both so deeply connected with one another that sacrifices would be doable, like if they were seperated due to work for a long time or smthn one of them would easily choose to quit if the other wasnt like “DONT DO THAT PLEASE”

40.Any special memories? Do they have a special place they like to go to?

so much of their relationship is closely documented bc of jawn, so a lot of memories are tangible things. the first show jawn photographed for them, their first date/kiss/time; sillier moments like slow dancing in the kitchen together or playing in the snow, stuff like that are all things they both value a lot. and big stuff, like playing warped and mainstage at festivals and releasing albums, or when he and jawn get a house together.

41. Are they party-goers? What are they like when they’re drunk? Does it happen often?

neither of them are very big on parties or drinking, but it happens infrequently. jawn’s very handsy when he’s drunk, touching geoff anywhere he can manage, kissing geoff and whispering absolutely obscene things to him. geoff’s a giggly drunk, so of course this makes him blush deep pink and laugh loud

45. Any special dreams or goals they have as a couple? Any heartbreaks? Regrets?

simple american-dream’y type things, like moving in together and getting married and having kids have always been dreams for the two of them. neither of them think they would’ve done anything different if given the chance, but they’re both often nostalgic about things that have happened

#ask #jawff #sorry this took so long i was GOIN THRU IT

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fpsantangelo · 6 years

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madbum and buster 😩😍🤠👬👅💦🤧💞🤤

ALRIGHT this is gonna be a nightmare bc 1. i dont follow the giants like,, at all, like i dont think ive ever even seen bum pitch dfkjsfkjls and 2. this ship makes me SAD bc ive only read one fic for them and it literally threw me into a depressive episode bc i didnt know it was gonna end like that so uhhh. lets see how this goes! woo!

ALSO - those emojis gave me a fucking stroke

okie dokie time to figure out this dynamic on the fly. giants fans, forgive me if i butcher this entirely.

so i googled it, and madbum is a big fucken boy holy christ, so i’m making an executive decision & saying he’s 100% a little spoon. the bigger the boy, the more they want to be cuddled, that’s just a scientific fact.

however, he’s also like,, really bad at asking for what he wants, so he’ll just keep scooting closer to buster & pushing up against him & being generally annoying until buster finally goes “what the fuck are you doing?” but then he’ll see that look in his eyes & he realizes what he wants & just hauls bum’s big ass up against him like it’s nothing

since i’m talking abt cuddling, they’re both incredibly snuggly sleepers, they’re always all up in each other’s space. bum wraps himself around buster’s middle & gets his legs all tangled up with his & nuzzles up into buster’s neck/shoulders. & buster tries to pretend like this annoys him, bitch that it’s too hot to be doing all this & try half-heartedly to push bum off, but really he loves it, & he’ll fall asleep with his face pressed into bum’s hair & with an arm around him tight, holding onto him & rubbing at his bicep

bum wakes up first 99% of the time, but he almost always just stays in bed & keeps holding on to buster, even after all these years.

tbh they vibe like a married couple that’s been together for years to me, just bc they’ve known each other for so long?? so i’ve got a lot of domestic thoughts running through my mind?? such as…

neither of them can cook. like seriously they’re both bad and this isn’t one of those things where ~they’re cute & learn how to do it together!!~ no, like straight up buster about burnt the house down in a lasagna attempt & bum is incapable of simple shit like grilled cheese. they can’t microwave popcorn. it’s a miracle they dont starve in the offseason.

by some act of god, bum can do breakfast though. it is their only combined culinary skill. they do pancakes & eggs for dinner a lot, which works out great for bum, bc it keeps buster a lil soft around the middle like he likes :-)

they’re both like,, appallingly bad at talking abt their feelings. like, even when they both knew they liked each other, it took them forever to finally get together bc neither one of them had the balls to make the first move

bum was the one who finally did it btw. he just sort of blurted out that he was in love w/ buster one night when he was over. in response, buster kissed him, called him a dumbass & then, after a few minutes of them sitting in stunned silence, told bum that he loved him too.

but yeah back to my original point, it’s rare that they get all soft & sappy with each other, especially buster. every now and then, when they’re all wrapped up in each other in the middle of the night, bum will go off on a little tangent abt how buster’s the perfect boyfriend & how he’d do anything for him, and buster usually shrugs him off tells him to shut up & go to sleep, even though he’s blushing & smiling. but it’s literally only like 2 or 3 times a year when buster gets all soft & quiet & tells bum how much he loves him & how lucky he got & he’s the best thing that ever happened to him & all that good shit

The first time buster did this, madison actually cried. he’s a little more used to it now

buster cuts bum’s hair. this is my whole ass favorite trope okay let me have this, it’s just so fucking soft, bum leaning back into buster’s hands & letting him move his head around real gentle & looking up at him & locking eyes every now & then & they just kind of smile at each other bc there’s no real good reason for them to be doing this anymore, they’ve got enough money to pay for a fucking haircut, but they’ve been doing this for as long as they’ve known each other & neither one of them wants to stop now, not when it reminds them of being stupid ass kids together who didn’t have any money & were too scared to make a move on each other & FUCK im weak for this trope yall.

aaaand i dont really know enough about either of them to confidently do much nsfw stuff, but i can say for a fact that everything about madbum absolutely screams service top to me, and yall cannot convince me otherwise. that big goofy lookin sweetie just wants to make buster feel good, god dammit.

#send me a ship & i'll give u headcanons!#charley answers asks #writing mine #fic #rpf #i feel like i did a decent amount for this all things considered #also uhh i cannot rec that fic ENOUGH even tho it made me wanna die its.. the best written thing ive ever read #did i do these two right??? pls i need to know lmao i pulled so much of this out of my ass #when in doubt just make it Soft AF i guess djfkff #country boooy i love u #managed to do this whole thing w/out nutting over their voices r yall proud?

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dystovian · 7 years

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Since youre in an angsty mood could I request a scenario w/ Lance's s/o (u could make it gender neutral if you want) is lashing out and distancing themselves bc they dont feel adequate and their depression (that they havent told him about) is acting up again? I understand that if this subject makes you feel uncomfortable you dont have to do it.

I’m surprised with myself tbh?? like, I think this is the most I’ve written yet not at the same time? as in the most realistically I’ve written imo. But enjoy ! also, if any of you are ever feeling this way, or any other way, message me anytime and I’ll answer as quickly as I can!——DISCLAIMER: this contains talks of depression and feeling as though they don’t matter.

“Hellooo, Y/n.” Lance slid onto the seat beside you at the table with a bowl of space goo and a spoon. The spoon annoyingly tapped the side of it, sending pulses through your brain as you tried your best to hide a wince.

“What do you want.” How blunt you were, shocked him. You were rarely like this. Though lately, you’ve distanced yourself, didn’t leave your room until the afternoon and only came out for an hour or three.

“I- I’m uhm. Y/n? Is everything alright?” He turned in his chair until his knees touched the side of your leg. He was obviously worried for you, usually you’d turn toward him and kiss his cheek during breakfast. But you wouldn’t even cast a glance at him.

“Mmm.” Tiredly, exhaustedly. You stood, taking your still full bowl into the kitchen. Hunk took it from you to clean it. You left Lance behind at the table absolutely shocked. Eyes wide as he finished his bowl of goo as quickly as possible. He went to the kitchen and asked Hunk what direction you went it.

“Y/n? It’s Lance. Can I come in?” Lance had jogged to your room after Hunk told him that you left.

“Sure. Why the hell not.” Your monotone and tired voice fit greatly with your emotionless face as you stared at the ceiling above you. Lance walked in, looking at you as you lay flat on your back on the floor.

“What’s wrong? You know for a fact you can talk to me, Y/n, right?” He crossed his feet and lowered himself beside you, legs crossed and arms holding his upper body up. You turned your head toward him, and stared. You were thinking obviously, and Lance was prepared for you to spew out your feelings. Sadly, that is not how it always was.

“What’s it to you? It’s not like I matter or anything. I’m just a person. I mean nothing, to anybody.” Your eyes went back to the ceiling, imagining random things like….like home. Lance turned, anger and frustration and sadness bubbling and murmuring inside of him, all at once. You were wrong, how could you think such menacing and blood curdling thoughts? How? Your thoughts pierced his heart. Cruelty.

“That is not true, Y/n. And you know that deep—deep—down. Tell me what’s wrong! I can help you if you just tell me what’s wrong!” He shouted, not that he noticed anyway. He sat up and was now on his knees beside you, arms and hands frantically moving along with his words and frustrations.

“You know what? Fine! I’ll tell you! I’m telling you, that I am nothing! I’m nothing but a weak human being who can’t do anything but sit in this stupid castle and— and eat stupid space goo! I’m nothing but a person who can’t maintain or start a relationship with anybody, because I’m sick and tired of committing to things just to be let down because I’m ugly and useless! I’m tired, Lance! I’ve never been so tired and I’m sick!” You were yelling now, standing to your feet. Not a single tear escaped from you. Which broke his heart. This meant you were used to these words. Used to them becoming planted to the sides of your brain and skull, to the point it’s normal. You were useless but your thoughts were not, they were there to corrupt you.

“Every night I wake up because my chest hurts so bad! Every single night! It’s hurts so much and I would’ve never told anyone—you!— if you had just left me alone for once! Why are you even with me?! All I do is nag and nag and complain! Why? I don’t understand! I can’t even take care of myself anymore! My medication is gone, Lance, GONE! It’s stuck back on Earth with the people I loved so much and they probably don’t even care. They, they’ve left.” Your voice quieted, a rainbow after a long sea of storms. Tears finally escaped your eyes, falling and landing on your shirt. Why? Why did it have to be you? Why was it you, that felt stuck on the roofs edge of a burning building? No where else to go. Why was it you, that was ripped from the almost loving atmosphere of Earth, to be thrown into a war?

“Y/n…” He was heartbroken, he had been here for you since 6th grade. Before that too, yes, but he was there for the new you, the depression struck you. He watched you slip through the sands of time many, many, times. And now he’s seeing it happen again. He grabbed for your sleeve desperately and yanked you toward him, it was rough, angry and desperate to feel you against him as you practically collapsed to the ground along with him. Why did it have to be you? He wants you to feel happy and loved.

“I’m sorry…” you whimper against him as his tears landed into your hair, it hurt the both of you so bad. The way you forced out your own whimpers and sobs was painful to the both of you. Your childhood was gone, all because of a wrong turn in your brains course that sent you spiraling into a deep, and dark black hole. You felt like you were drowning, suffocating and begging for help in this life you were living, against your very own will. You wished to do things, but you couldn’t, it felt like an elephant would sit on your chest, enabling you from doing simple tasks; such as taking care of yourself, or actually providing comfort and safety to those around you. Something you so greatly wanted to do.

“It’s gonna be okay. I promise you. Please just remember that, you’ll get better. I-I can have Hunk or-or Keith go find some sort of medication for you! Just, just please promise me you’ll try.” The desperation in his pleading cracked through your ear drums. Maybe, you could try.

Maybe. Just maybe. You could try.

“I love you.”

Who said it?

#lance #lance mcclain #lance x reader #lance mcclain x reader #langst #voltron #voltron x reader #voltron angst #voltron legendary defender #shito fics

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