#he's trying to dance around what she wants him to say without outright saying it | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

jeannineee · 9 months

Text

Closure (Ⅱ)

Azriel x Reader

a/n: part two is here :) comment if you want to be added to the taglist in part 3. Quickly edited!!

PART ONE

PART THREE

warnings: angst, slight hints at depression, smut (18+ please)

“If you’re not going to eat your bacon…” Cassian trailed off, eyeing your half-eaten breakfast.

You slid your plate across the table. “Have at it.”

Mor swatted the back of Cassian’s head as he devoured the food you gave him, a scowl on her face. “She needs to eat, dumbass.”

Cassian spoke with his mouth full, “She was finished!”

“I was finished, Mor,” you interjected, rising from the table. “I’ll be in my study.”

“You’ve been in there a lot, lately,” Cassian said, with Mor shooting him a condescending glare in response.

“I’ve been busy,” you lied smoothly. “I’ve a lot to prepare, especially with the visit to the Hewn City happening tomorrow.”

Something like concern shone in the pair’s eyes, but they both knew better than to speak of it. Cassian refocused his attention to the plate before him as Mor nodded. “Let me know if you need anything.”

You didn’t so much as glance over you shoulder as you made your way to your study. You shut the wooden door after entering, refusing to look in the mirror to your right. You were almost certain of what your reflection would look like, anyway.

Azriel hadn’t spoken to you in almost two weeks. Not a single word, after the night you told him about wanting to end your…whatever situation you had going on with him.

Mother above, you missed him. It wasn’t the sex that you missed, as good as it was. You missed him. You missed his presence, his conversation.

Azriel wasn’t quite ignoring you, but he wasn’t going out of his way to speak to you, either. When it came to Elain, however, he was more than happy to drop everything for her.

You knew you shouldn’t be jealous. Azriel wasn’t yours, nor were you his. But each time he approached Elain, rage boiled through you, so unrelenting you often had to walk away for fear of what you’d do to her.

You could thank the mating bond for that.

Based on his behavior, you were almost certain that Azriel hadn’t felt the bond yet. Or perhaps he had, and chose to ignore it.

Or maybe he didn’t want to be your mate?

Or perhaps he’d never feel the bond, and you’d never know the answer to that question.

~~~~~~~~~~

The Hewn City hadn’t changed from your last visit.

Rhys and Feyre stood perched on the throne, overlooking the crowd. Some danced, some conversed, while others outright stared at the High Lord and Lady, and their Inner Circle—likely in fear.

As they should.

You’d joined Rhysand’s inner circle almost three hundred years ago. You were no stranger to the doings of the Court of Nightmares. Still, every visit had you itching to return home to Velaris.

You leaned against one of the columns towards the back of the throne room, unable to hide your lack of interest. Mor and Cassian were lost to the crowd, and Azriel was…you didn’t know where he was.

Sighing in boredom, you picked at the fabric of your dress—which, in truth, left little to the imagination. Such was normal in the Court of Nightmares.

As if in response to your previous thoughts, the bond in your chest roared to life as the spymaster approached you, his blue siphons gleaming, wings tucked in tightly.

“You look like you’re having fun,” Azriel said, voice dripping with sarcasm as his shadows swirled around the two of you.

You scoffed. “That’s all you have to say to me? Two weeks without so much as a ‘hello,’ and that’s the first thing you say?”

Azriel’s jaw clenched, and you bit the inside of your cheek as his annoyance flooded through the bond.

“I’ve been busy.”

“With Elain,” you snapped, too angry to rein in your jealousy. “How’s her garden coming along?”

“Why do you care about Elain?”

“Because she’s taking all of your time.”

“You aren’t entitled to any of my time,” Azriel spat, more pissed off than you’d ever seen him.

The words stung, but they were true. You took a step back, trying to ignore the tears stinging your eyes. Azriel took notice, his expression immediately softening.

“I didn’t mean that, y/n.”

You ignored him, instead leaving the throne room, heading out into the empty hall. Azriel was quick to follow, grabbing your arm, and whirling you around to face him as he said, “I’m sorry.”

“You have nothing to be sorry for,” you replied, pulling away from his grasp, and continuing down the hall. “Your…relationship with Elain is none of my business. I shouldn’t have said anything.”

“Don’t do that,” Azriel said, closely following behind.

“Do what?” You kept your gaze trained ahead as you stalked down the hall, eyes burning.

“Don’t act like it doesn’t affect you.”

“It doesn’t affect me.”

Azriel grabbed you again, pulling you from the hall, into an empty study. “I see how you look at Elain.”

Your breath stopped short in your lungs. Your surprised eddied into hurt. “Don’t be mean, Azriel.” The words sounded childish; weak as they left you. “Don’t be mean.”

“I’m not trying to be mean—“

“Then stop mentioning Elain. I know how you feel about her, and you obviously know how I feel about her. I don’t need you to rub salt in the wound.”

Azriel sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “You said there’d be no strings attached.”

“You created that rule.”

“And you agreed.”

“What do you want, Azriel?” You were frustrated. Hurt. But most of all, you were tired.

Azriel blinked—the most surprise he’d ever show. “I want to know what you have against Elain. Why do you dislike her so much?”

“I don’t dislike her.”

“You’re lying.”

“Why does it matter?”

“Because you’re my friend,” Azriel answered, taking a step toward you.

There was that word again. That word that carved your heart out each time he said it.

Friend.

“Why do you dislike her?” Azriel pressed again, close enough now that you had to tilt your head back to meet his eyes.

“Because you’re in love with her!”

Azriel froze.

Your shoulders dropped, the tears you’d so desperately tried to stave away now streaming down your face. “Y-You’re in love with her. And I can’t—I can’t stand it.”

Azriel only stared. And stared. You’d never seen the Shadowsinger in such a state—in shock.

“Say something,” you breathed, wiping at the tears on your cheeks. “Please.”

Please. Such a pitiful word. Weak. Childish.

Azriel opened his mouth, as if to respond. Instead, he rushed forward, pressing his lips to yours. He brought one hand to the nape of your neck, the other to the small of your back, deepening the kiss.

You melted into his touch on instinct, cursing yourself for the small whimpers that escaped you as his tongue explored your mouth.

Azriel backed you into the wall, attaching his lips to your jaw, your neck. Your hands trailed down his chest, his stomach, before stopping at the waist of his leathers, working to undo the buckles.

It took little time for you to free his length from the confines of his leathers. He groaned into your mouth as you stroked him, the sound heightening your arousal.

Azriel lifted you against the wall, and you wrapped your legs around him. His eyes met yours, and as he slid into you, you decided you could die like this. You could learn to accept having some of him. Something was better than nothing.

You needed him. Needed him like air, or water.

Perhaps you should feel shame, or regret, for being so content with having only pieces of him, while Elain gets everything he has to offer.

But each thrust of his hips silenced any protest that might have come to the surface. Each murmured praise, each caress of his lips on your skin felt like a prayer that only he could answer.

And as he brought you over the edge, his name was the only word you could manage. His touch was the only thing you cared about—anchoring you to the world; a lifeline.

Your name sounded sweet as honey on his lips as Azriel found release within you. He remained connected to you as the two of you regulated your breathing, his lips still sloppily, tiredly claiming your own.

Azriel slowly eased out of you, helping you to your feet. He reverently fixed your dress, your hair, his face so soft, touch so gentle you almost wanted to cry.

Some small, insecure part of you couldn’t help but wonder if he treated Elain like this. Had he taken her to bed yet? Would he?

The thought of Elain and Azriel touching one another…your stomach churned.

“Are you alright?” Azriel asked.

“Yes.”

A pretty lie. You shouldn’t have done this.

“Are you sure?”

“I’m sure.”

Azriel studied you a moment longer, before relenting. “We should probably go back separately…”

As if you weren’t already seen leaving together.

You swallowed the lump in your throat. “Sure. Go ahead. I’ll be a few minutes.”

Azriel gave you a final once-over. He looked inclined to speak, but decided against it as he left you alone.

The bond writhed within you. It called to Azriel, urging you to go to him, to say anything, do anything.

But you stood, frozen. Unmoving.

~~~~~~~~~

You were unsure of how much time had passed before you finally made your way back to the throne room. You tried your best to shove away your encounter with Azriel—to pretend it didn’t happen.

It was near impossible, with his hazel eyes being glued to you all night. Even more so, as he glared at any male who dared to walk your way.

You told him you wanted to end things, to stop the casual sex. Yet here you were, only weeks later, spreading your legs for him again.

What the hell were you getting yourself into?

~~~~~~~~~~

taglist: @brekkershadowsinger @1nksta1neddesk @naturakaashi @officialleehi @sirenpearldust @j-pendragonx @positivewitch @llovelydove @aria-chikage @kemillyfreitas @librafairy @bbycowboi @theotheory @cat-or-kitten @azriels-shadowsinger @anyzandy @orangecomfortfoods @stargirl1714 @bubybubsters @morrie-rose @rubygirly @woodland-mist @previousloversandmuses @valeridarkness @thelov3lybookworm @going-through-shit @fussel9913 @starlight-hope @venuseuripedis @tothestarsandwhateverend @illyrian-dreamer

#acotar #a court of thorns and roses #acotar headcanon #acotar fanfiction #acomaf #acotar smut #smut #female reader #azriel x reader #azriel acotar #Azriel angst #Azriel #angst #acotar angst

900 notes · View notes

ineffable-endearments · 5 months

Text

I was rethinking the bookshop meta I wrote a while ago and realized I was not thinking big enough.

The bookshop has always been Aziraphale's version of Crowley's plants (his trauma reenactment), but also, absolutely everything Aziraphale does in Season 2 is a re-creation of Heaven's role. Crowley's behavior also encompasses everything, not just his plants.

I've seen it suggested that centering Aziraphale and Crowley's trauma histories is reducing their characters to behaving like just reactive victims instead of survivors with agency. Or worse, it's "excusing bad behavior." I don't agree with either of these, because I feel that part of Good Omens is about how large, powerful systems affect individuals, and so the context of every character's decisions matters a lot to the overall themes of the story. Everyone starts out working within a system they believe to reflect reality and then has to learn how to break free of it. You cannot really illustrate that without having the characters start out being genuinely trapped with different ways of coping with their reality.

This is an attempt at a pretty big-picture meta. Although it isn't a plot prediction, it's how I think some of the series' themes are going to progress. It starts out perhaps a little grim, but in the long run, it's how Aziraphale's character growth and relationship with Crowley can simultaneously be massive for them as individuals, a crucial part of the overarching narrative message of the series, and symbolic of a change in all of Heaven and Hell, all while allowing the themes to continue to prioritize human free will.

In short, it's about Aziraphale's problems, but it's also meant to be an Aziraphale love post.

All of the below exists in tandem with Good Omens as a comedy of errors. Just because there are heavy ideas does not mean they will not also be funny. Look back on how much of Season 2 seemed silly until we started to pick it apart! One of the amazing things about Good Omens is how it manages to do both silly and serious at once! (I feel like that's maybe a little Terry Pratchett DNA showing through. "Laughter can get through the keyhole while seriousness is still hammering on the door," as Terry himself said.)

Aziraphale has really embraced his connection to Crowley in Season 2, and he has also become considerably more assertive toward Heaven and Hell. These are both major growth points compared to the beginning of Season 1.

However, again, we have the concept of growing pains...Aziraphale is starting to re-create Heaven's role in his relationship with Crowley and humanity. It's really obvious with the Gabriel argument and the I Was Wrong Dance, but I think we see it all over the place: he seems to feel any serious dissent is a betrayal. He also seems to assume there's a dominance hierarchy and he, of course, is on top. Now that he's decided to take control of his own future, then surely that does mean he's the one in control, right?

With all that said, he still seems to have trouble being direct about the feelings that make him most vulnerable. He manipulates people and engineers situations in which he can try to get his emotional needs met rather than saying things outright (case in point: the Ball).

Like I pointed out in the bookshop meta: subconsciously, he's playing the role of God, modified with what God would be if She were everything he wants Her to be. He's generous, almost infinitely sweet, always does what's best for people...or, at least, what he believes is best for people. During the Ball, Aziraphale influences the people around him to be comfortable and happy even when they're not supposed to be, and he limits their ability to talk about things he thinks are too rude or improper for happy, formal occasions.

Doesn't this pattern sort of make sense for an angel who's just discovering free will? Like, at the end of Season 1, he made an enormous choice to stand against Heaven and realized he could survive it. Now he's gone a bit overboard with exerting his own will. Unfortunately, while he's learned to question upper management, he's still operating on a fundamental framework of the universe where there have to be two sides and there has to be a hierarchy. Also, since Aziraphale is on the Good side, he of course has to gear his desires into what's Good rather than just what he wants, so he sometimes thinks he's doing things for others when really he's doing things for himself. (For example, matchmaking Maggie and Nina started out as something he wanted to use to lie to Heaven, but by the time he was commenting "Maggie and Nina are counting on me," he seemed sincere, like he had genuinely convinced himself this was for them and not for himself.)

Aziraphale knows Heaven interferes in human affairs, ostensibly on God's behalf. He thinks She should be intervening in ways that are beneficial. What I believe the narrative wants him to learn is that God and Heaven shouldn't be manipulating people at all, not even for Good, and in fact there is no real meaningful hierarchy.

Anyway, a top-down, totally unquestioned hierarchy is the primary social relationship Aziraphale has known, and it's certainly been the dominant one for most of his existence: you're either the boss or the underling, and if someone seriously questions you, they don't have faith in you - they don't respect you.

No, his relationship with Crowley has not always been like that, but they've been creating their relationship from whole cloth, so how would he know it shouldn't become that way, now that it's "real" and out in the open?

No, human relationships aren't like that, but Aziraphale clearly does not see himself or Crowley as human. As the relationship approached something that seemed like it must be "legitimate," Aziraphale would naturally look for a framework to fit it to. And again, the only one he has is the shape of "intimacy," or what passes for it, in Heaven. What has "trust" always meant in all his "legitimate" relationships? It has always meant unquestioning obedience, of course. What have the warm fuzzies felt like in Heaven? Well, praise from the angels above him is nice, so that must be it, right?

Aziraphale even describes being in love as "what humans do," separating out that relationship style. Someday, I think he'll realize he favors the shape of love on Earth, something that's more inherently equal, more give-and-take. Look at how he idealizes it from afar at the Ball. But I think that, like Crowley before Nina pointed it out, Aziraphale maybe hasn't 100% grokked that it can and in fact should work that way for him and Crowley, too. Just like people can desperately want to dance without knowing how to dance, or can desperately want to speak a language without knowing the language, Aziraphale does not instinctively know how to have the kind of relationship where he can be truly vulnerable and handle Crowley's vulnerability as well.

Aziraphale is downright obsessed with French, known as the "language of love." He's trying to learn it the Earthly way. He's not very good at it, but he wants to be.

This pattern is still present during the Final Fifteen even if we assume Aziraphale is asking Crowley to become an angel again out of fear (and I find it very hard to believe that fear doesn't factor in at all). He's still building his interactions off of that Heaven-like framework: he asks Crowley to trust him blindly, he tries to assume a leadership role with a plan Crowley never agreed to and couldn't follow anyway, and he tries very hard not to leave room for an ounce of doubt. He also suggests making Crowley his second-in-command and obviously does not register that this could possibly be offensive. Again, I think this is because for Aziraphale, there has always been a hierarchy in Heaven, it's started to transfer to his relationship with Crowley, and breaking out of that assumption about relationships is going to take more processing than a single argument can do.

As I mentioned in another post, I don't believe Aziraphale had a real choice about whether he accepted the Supreme Archangel position. I think he could sense that he was not getting out of it and chose to look on the bright side, to see it as an opportunity. And instead of looking realistically at how that would feel to Crowley, he tried to sweep Crowley up to Heaven with him using toxic positivity, appeals to morality, and appeals to their relationship itself. Again, mimicking what Heaven has done to him.

To me, "they're not talking" is a big clue that Aziraphale's approach with Crowley is going to be the mistake the narrative really wants him to face. "Not talking" has, thus far, been presented as the central conflict of Season 3! After losing the structure and feedback Heaven gave him, Aziraphale started creating Heaven-like patterns in his relationship with Crowley, and breaking out of those patterns is what he needs to do. Discovering first-hand that Heaven's entire modus operandi is bad no matter who's in charge is how he can do it.

Look, either you're sympathetic to Aziraphale's control issues or you're not. Personally, I am. He's trying so, so hard to be good. I think trying to figure yourself out (which Aziraphale is clearly doing) is hard enough, and when you start balancing what you want for yourself, what you think are your responsibilities, and what other people are actively asking of you, you're bound to fall into the patterns that have been enforced for your whole life or for millions of years, whichever came first.

It is very easy to assume that people should Just Be Better, but it's not actually that simple to be a thinking, feeling person. My anxiety tends to move in a very inward direction and Aziraphale's moves outward. But I'd imagine the desperation and exhaustion are the same.

Unlike Nina, Aziraphale became a rebound mess. I don't think it occurred to either him or to Crowley that there could be any soul-searching, anything but carrying on with the new normal after their stalemate with Heaven and Hell.

Now, instead of getting rejected by Heaven and surviving it, Aziraphale needs to be the one to reject Heaven. It needs to be a choice. And that choice is going to come from realizing that Heaven isn't just poorly managed but also represents a bad framework for all relationships.

How could this happen? Good question. We're obviously not supposed to know yet, although I think picking at existing themes within the narrative could possibly give us hints.

It's possible Aziraphale's character development trajectory will be akin to Adam Young's in Season 1. Please see this stellar post by eidetictelekinetic for more thoughts about it, but basically, in Season 1, Adam saw that the world was not what he wanted it to be and decided his vision was better; as he ascended to power, he took complete control over all his friends and then soon realized that's not what he wants because there's no point in trying to have relationships with people who can't choose you. It's that realization that leads Adam to conclude he doesn't want to take over the world and to reject the role he's expected to play as the Antichrist. Maybe Aziraphale's trip to Heaven is an attempt at a control move during which he'll realize he's defeating his own point.

Aziraphale clearly wants to be chosen. From the very beginning, he's wanted to be special and cared for - just like Crowley has.

Incidentally, I think Aziraphale and Crowley are going to represent pieces of the bigger picture here, and this - first imitating and then rejecting Heaven's relationship style - can both symbolize Heaven's transformation and directly start it (probably in an amusing, somewhat indirect way, like when he handed off the flaming sword to Adam).

If I'm right - which I may very well not be - I think this would all be so, SO cool. Like, "An angel who is subconsciously trying to be a better God" is a concept with so much potential for both tender kindness and incredible darkness. Add to that the comedy-of-errors aspect of "...but even deeper down, he'd much rather just be super gay on Earth" and you have, in my opinion, a perfect character.

I think this could work for Crowley as well. It's obvious that in the Good Omens universe, at least so far, Hell is all about detesting humans and punishing them; Satan seems to genuinely hate humans (unlike in some of NG's other works). Our perspective on this could change, but it potentially puts Crowley in a complementary position to Aziraphale, as a demon who is trying to be "better" than Satan. But this isn't about being "morally better." It's about things having a point. Crowley's exploits usually have a point: they test people. And you can pass his tests! He sincerely likes making trouble, but Crowley doesn't live to punish.

But, once again, the above paragraph would describe a transient phase for this infinitely charming character. Because, again, I think the point will be that in the end, Crowley's deeper-down desire, moreso than testing Creation, is watching it grow with a glass of wine in hand.

#go3 speculation

172 notes · View notes

litnerdwrites · 1 month

Text

About the dancing chapter...

I agree 100% with this comment by the amazing @deathbealady (no seriously, I didn't even realise how similar this situation was to Mor's) and I wanted to use it as a jumping off point to talk about Eris Vansera. To be clear though, I like fanon Eris and am currently undecided about canon Eris, for reasons I'll explain later.

For now, we can start with the IC asking Nesta to try and seduce Eris. I refuse to believe they weren't given this idea by Elain, either because she volunteered Nesta outright, or because she put the idea of using Nesta's artistic passions that, at this point, they know were effectively weaponised by her mother, to seduce an older male with the idea of marriage.

Either way, the fact that the IC knew what Nesta's mother had done, and decided to take advantage of it without ever asking what she thought of it, or what she might like, despite it being the same thing done to Mor when she was Nesta's age, if not younger. It's made especially worse given that Nesta likely feels unable say 'no' to the IC, because if she does, she'd likely be threatened with Elain being made to do it.

If that isn't bad enough, and I wouldn't be sure if it could get worse if I wasn't about to tell you why, then we can take a look at the age gap between Eris and Nesta. I've heard people argue that it's fine, since they're both consenting adults, but I think that the term 'adults' needs to be redefined. Humans are considered adults at the age of 18 or so, but only have a fully developed frontal love at 25. Meanwhile, fae are considered adults by the age of about 50 to 80 (with the latter being the age that a High Lord can be named such, but some people say it's 50). This has some pretty serious implications.

Starting with the fact that if females in Illyria and the CON are married off/wings clipped when they have their first period, which seems to be from around the same time human women have theirs, to 18 if they try to prevent it through medication, then they aren't adults themselves. They aren't even half way there in the (I don't want to say mild, best case, better or anything like that case because it's all messed up) cases where the woman is 18 or so. It also implies that a fae female's frontal lobe isn't developed until she's over fifty, since we don't have evidence to suggest the contrary.

Just because Nesta was almost 25 when she became fae doesn't make it alright either. Given that her aging must have slowed astronomically when she was turned, it's fair to assume it would have a huge impact on maturity and brain development. Which means the Archeron sister's in general might have serious gaps in the way their brains develop, especially Feyre, since she was resurrected and her body changed. It might even be slightly different for Nesta and Elain since they were killed, pulled apart and put back together in the cauldron.

Since it was the cauldron, there's a chance that their brains were also changed to be like fae, but either way, both possibilities and scenarios come back to the same answer: The Archeron Sisters are still mentally children, and will likely remain so for several decades longer, perhaps even longer than regular fae due to the unprecedented and irregular nature of their existence.

This brings me back to the subject of Nesta and Eris. He is a grown adult many centuries older than Nesta, with frontal lobe development and centuries of experience. Nesta is barely even half way to being an adult, while he is over 500. Moreover, the IC believe that Eris is a monster.

Now, I'm well aware that there's likely more to the issues between Eris and Mor than what we've seen. Between Eris's own words regarding 'circumstances' that he wouldn't explain, to the narrative going out of his way to show us good parts of him. Such as the way he moved to protect his mother at the HL meeting, and how he let his own father torture him but still protected the IC's secrets and took the unnecessary verbal abuse from Cassian. There's even the fact that Eris simply lets others believe him to be the villain, and let's Mor control the narrative for her own comfort, as opposed to spilling whatever happened, even if it would, somehow, absolve him.

Now, to be perfectly clear, there is little Eris could say that would absolve him, truly, of what happened. I acknowledge that he's a victim of his father, however that doesn't mean he can't also be Morrigan's abuser. And yes, even if he didn't touch her, neglect is abuse. Leaving her there for dead, regardless of the reasons, is a messed up thing to do. The categories of victim and abuser are not mutually exclusive.

The narrative wants us, as readers, to question Eri's actions and begin to wonder what happened between him and Lucien and Mor. It wants us to open up to the idea that Eris may not be as bad as he's made out to be, and that there's something more sinister happening, since it puts some level of suspicion on Lucien, Mor and Beron. However, just because that's the story we're being fed as readers, doesn't mean that the characters have the same perspective, or are living the same story, necessarily.

If you think about it, they have no reason to believe that Eris isn't a psycho who abuses woman and would slaughter his brothers to get to the crown. His comment about circumstances does read like an abuser trying to justify his actions with little effort, while giving no real reason, not that one would make up for what the IC believes he did. It's not a good enough reason to absolve him or make him seem like a good person.

He still hunted Feyre down, even though he had no reason to once she and Lucien made it to the Winter Court, and it, logically, would've caused more trouble for Beron if they were caught. Especially since a whole fire fight took place, and it would be easy for Kallias to connect that with autumn citizens, since he didn't know about Feyre's magic. If anything, hunting them at that point would've caused more problems and they'd be better off just telling Beron that Feyre and Lucien were there. A high lady, if Beron acknowledges the title or not, trespassing in foreign lands with a banished son would be enough to raise a fuss about.

He, also, has people who've known him for centuries, from Mor to Lucien (though the latter probably has more accurate info given his connections in various courts, and the fact it's unlikely Mor shared many words with him over 5 centuries) and the fact he's essentially blackmailing the Nc. This is more so an issue of his having certain pieces of information being a cause for the IC to fear what he may do with it, or what might be found out by their enemies if they use torture or a daemati.

I'm not saying, by any means, that I hate him. I think he's actually written better than Rhysand at this point, since unlike Rhysie playing hero, Eris knows he's a terrible person and low key owns it. Whether or not that's subject to change is dependant of SJM's writing in the future. There's a chance she may actually turn him into Rhys 2.0 by pretended he was a good guy all along.

However, regardless of his reasons, he has done so many atrocious things that the IC have no reason to think he's a descent person. Mor clearly hasn't said anything about what happened and, as much as I don't like her, she has no on page motive to antagonise Eris otherwise. That might change later, especially if she's the traitor, but as of now, her behaviour seems understandable, somewhat, based on the version of events that she gives.

Yet, despite all of this, the IC still think that essentially whoring Nesta out to Eris because it suits their goals. Regardless of the risks to Nesta's safety, regardless of how Nesta feels about the matter and and simply going off of Feyre's guesses about how Nesta feels without ever feeling the need to confirm if any of them are accurate to Nesta.

Let me summarise: Rhysand and Feyre, Nesta's own sister, thought it was a good idea to use Nesta's artistic passions to seduce a man that is literally 20 times Nesta's age, letting said man ask for Nesta's hand, and letting Nesta consider accepting despite the IC believing he is a woman torturing psycho that would throw her to the wolves at the first chance if it helped him in the end.

Let's not forget that while Eris may be bit of a grey area for us at the moment, the IC knows that Eris also lives with abusers, like Beron, who'd have no issue using physical violence against Nesta. So even if they thought Eris wasn't a monster for some reason, they'd still be putting Nesta in danger. Especially if Beron is working with the Death God, who wants the trove and is using Bryallin to find it.

Oh, and this was all after Cassian came to the conclusion that Nesta was suicidal, and was sexually assaulted in a vision, if I remember right, while on a life threatening mission in a place the rest of the IC, even Amren, is scared of.

Regardless of what Rhysand says, he allows abusers near enough to his family, or the ones he doesn't care as much about, I suppose, and is seemingly willing to let them marry said abusers if it gets him his goal. Rhysand who was abused. Rhysand who's mother was forced into child marriage.

Rhysand who seems to ignore the fact that the Archeron sisters are children. Children can't consent, if it wasn't clear enough to him already. Also, consent must be informed, and last I checked, Nesta wasn't informed about Eris beyond him being a snake. She isn't given a heads up about how abusive he's believed to be, how he may have to kill/watch you die if his dad decides so, or how he's likely to leave you bleeding out in the woods if you're injured. This is literally what the IC believe he is like and they didn't tell her.

Consent needs to be voluntary. I think it's been well established that Nesta likely doesn't feel like she can make real decisions because of consequences she may face.

He's also completely willing to send a suicidal (you can't argue that he doesn't know since Cassian reports everything to Rhysand, and kind of Feyre, apparently, from her Valkyries to her progress in 'healing'/being brainwashed so there's no reason he wouldn't report that too) into life threatening situations, put them in a place where they could jump to their deaths at any moment, with magic that could provide literally anything but alcohol, and filled with weapons.

To conclude, Eris is a grey area in ACOTAR that, at this point, reads as what Rhysand kind of should've been if SJM didn't make him a good guy for no reason. Meanwhile, this 'good guy' is endangering his sister in law through abuse, emotional blackmail and brainwashing, while putting her in proximity with a known abuser. Might I remind you that she's a minor? With possible developmental gaps. And he's doing it all because her being in danger makes his life easier, and the cousin that the dude abused is going along with this without any issue.

79 notes · View notes

moonah-rose · 4 months

Text

Always get a bit frustrated whenever I see a comment on a kitty-edit that's like "Oh Kitty had such a sad childhood, but at least she has the Captain now."

Don't get me wrong, I love their relationship, it's adorable, he is definitely her dad as evident by how she views him as such in flashbacks the same way Alison is her sister.

But I feel like people forget that their relationship is actually fairly new? She outright says in the first series that she does not like him and that he's only got worse since Alison arrived. It's not until S3 they start to warm to each other and what makes it work so beautifully is how it coincides with Cap becoming more true to his (fabulous) self, rather than trying to be the bossy soldier. Basically he fits the mould of her real father, both good and bad, but the more he subconsciously reminds her of how cold and strict her father could be, rather than his sweeter moments, the less she wants to be around him. When he starts to let his real self show and become more the man she wishes her dad had been is when that bond starts to form. That's what I find interesting about them.

However the suggestion that Cap is the only one to care for her or even the one who cares the most I feel does a real disservice to the other ghosts. They all absolutely adore her in their own way.

Her friendship with Mary was adorable and I love how protective Mary was of her even before Kitty died, insulting her father for ruining her fun, then standing up for her when she stood up for Cap, them gushing over things together like the rice krispies and the snow globe, making up their inventory song, Mary comforting Kitty at the party and putting her to bed. How heartbroken Kitty was at losing her and desperate to believe she would come back.

Every scene she and Pat have together, him being her dance partner but also him being the one to take on trying to explain death to her and doing as a parent would, how he probably did the first time Daley had to deal with death, it's just so relatable how he didn't want to be harsh but needing to be honest.

Julian calling her a "dear, sweet thing", him being the only one to attempt to explain to her how baby's are made (graphic and disturbing as it was), how he's ready to tell her the truth about Santa but as soon as he's sees the look on her face it's enough to melt his Tory heart is the peak Christmassy scene of that episode for me.

Thomas hugging her at the panto (one of only two hugs we get in this show!) and being so grateful for having her as his manager, how gentle he is when he asks to inspect her hands for the spider bite.

Robin knowing her pregnancy shtick is nonsense but going along with it like a brother being roped into his kid sister's make believe, rubbing her feet for her and sitting with her most of the day, him leaving a party that he loves to take moment to encourage her to cry her feelings out and then helping Mary put her to bed, how she only has to call his name and he's jumping in to scare off the plaguers.

Everything with her and Humphey! How she's the one who is the most concerned about where he is and making sure he's in one piece so he's not left behind, these two have the most adorable Uncle and Niece vibes.

Fanny is the only one I feel the show let slide on having her bond with, I think the most progression they have is Fanny praising Kitty's speaking in S4. Kinda miffed about this one because without Mary and with Alison gone, they're the only girls left and it would have been nice if they'd developed a mother-daughter bond.

Last but not least her and Alison! Their relationship is so important to S3 and how it contrasts to Alison's storyline with Lucy. Even though Lucy turns out to be a fake, it's still a good show of the importance of found family as much as blood family, how Kitty is jealous at first but then becomes the catalyst for figuring out who Lucy really is and protecting Alison from being scammed. It's such an important arc for her character that gets sadly forgotten, how she's not smug with joy that Lucy is gone at the end but just expresses sympathy for Alison losing the sister she never had. "You're the sister I never had" was the line that I first choked up at in this show. Also props to Kitty for literally annoying someone into being a true. best friend, she gives the rest of us losers hope!

Overall just how lucky Kitty is at the end of the day, that yes she had this privileged but ultimately toxic upbringing and died very young - but now she's surrounded by these people who absolutely adore her and might not always cope with it the right way but they just want to protect her because she is so sweet and endearing. If I could add any scene to the finale I feel like Alison should have got to have one talk with Kitty where she assures her that yeah they'll be apart but she's always at the end of the phone and will visit often, but also assuring her that she still has SEVEN people who love her to bits which is more than a lot of us get.

#bbc ghosts #ghosts meta #kitty higham #found family

26 notes · View notes

legolasghosty · 10 months

Text

I blame @latinposeidon for this. This post he made inspired it. I failed in the 'Don't write a ficlet' department. Enjoy!

Hmmmm, which color, Willie wondered, his fingers dancing over the sea of black lids in Julie's drawer. Okay, this probably wasn't what she'd meant when she said he could borrow some of her stuff for the band's gig tonight, but well, Willie had been eyeballing her nail polish collection for like a month now.

What, it was pretty. The little flashes of color always caught their eye in the best way when other people wore it. And without Caleb around to police their wardrobe choices, he could finally give it a try.

Though maybe there was a reason Willie hadn't just asked Julie outright if he could borrow hers. Maybe he was a bit nervous about how it would look. Maybe they couldn't quite shake Caleb's disapproving glares, couldn't always ignore the nightmares of that same expression coming from the faces of Julie or Luke or Reggie...

Willie tried not to think about the dreams where Alex gave him that look.

But those were just dreams and this was real. Willie wanted to do this and they were going to. He just had to pick a color already.

"Everybody decent in-" Julie started, entering the room and cutting herself off at the sight of Willie hunched over her desk. "What's going on in here?" she asked slowly.

Oh geez, this wasn't good. She was going to get mad. Boys weren't supposed to wear nail polish. And they definitely weren't supposed to just take stuff without asking. There went Willie's friendship with the one lifer who could see him-

"Ooo, are we doing nails?" Julie questioned, peering over their shoulder into the drawer. "Perfect, I needed to do something with mine anyways."

Willie just stared at her for a long moment. What? She wasn't upset? Why wasn't she upset? Was she pretending? Why would she-

"Willie, you're spiraling," Julie said softly, touching his arm. "You're doing that same glazed-over thing Reggie does. What's going on?"

Willie shook his head. Right. This was Julie, not Caleb. She'd already let them borrow and tie up her hoodies and oversized band shirts more than once. She hadn't batted an eye when he walked in on Alex braiding their hair. It was fine.

"I just haven't painted my nails before," Willie confessed, voice much softer than he'd intended. "Caleb didn't let us."

Julie bit her lower lip and nodded. Willie didn't talk about Caleb much, so he wasn't surprised that she didn't really know what to do with this information.

"It's fine," he added. "Just got in my head for a second." More than a second, but who was counting? "Well there's no Caleb here now," Julie said after another silent moment. She reached for the drawer, fingers wrapping around one of the bottles. "What color do you want?" Willie was a little startled by their own laughter. "Well that's what I was trying to figure out," they explained, twisting the black ring around their middle finger.

Julie gave him a long, appraising look. "How do you feel about pink?" she asked, after taking in his black shorts and purple and white crop top.

"Isn't pink more Alex's color?" Willie asked slowly. He couldn't stop himself from checking out the options though. That one was almost the same color Alex's cheeks got when Willie kissed them.

"Well yeah, so it'll make him lose his mind," Julie retorted. "Pick a color."

Willie grinned and grabbed a cotton candy bottle of polish.

"Perfect," Julie agreed, choosing a dark purple color of her own. "I'll do you, you do me."

Willie nodded, grinning. They perched on her desk, letting her take the chair. Julie laid out some paper towels in case of any drips and they got to work.

And Alex did lose his mind a bit over the pink on Willie's fingertips. Though he confessed later, when it was just the two of them curled up in the loft of the garage, that it was Willie's grin that got him first. And really, what was Willie supposed to say to that? Alex was just being too cute. All Willie could really do was kiss him at that point, his pink nails tangled in the pink string of Alex's hoodie.

#legolas tag #julie and the phantoms #jatp fanfic #willex #jatp #alex mercer #willie jatp #they're cute your honor #Willie deserves a hug and some nail polish

59 notes · View notes

the5n00k · 1 year

Text

Scratch in Scratch the Surface vs I Wanna Dance With Some-Ollie

[[[spoilers for season 2]]]

Long post sorry

I've been comparing these two episodes a lot, especially after the song Ghosts Aren't the Enemy from Book Marks the Sprite reminding me SO much of Lose-Lose from season 1. The conflicts are pretty similar, Molly has to keep someone from finding out about Scratch because of real and disastrous consequences, although instead of the flow of failed phantoms, this season it's the ghost chaser Chens. They aren't directly comparable since the contexts are different (Libby is a close friend and Ollie is a romantic interest) ((I'M SPEAKING CANONICALLY DON'T KILL ME SHIPPERS)) and the plot of Some-Ollie isn't really "hide Scratch" it's more focused on Molly and Ollie's relationship and how Scratch is reacting to it. Speaking of which:

Scratch's reaction to Molly's concerns about Libby is very dismissive. He doesn't really care about her and he's not super invested in Molly's personal problems either. The only times he's helped her out (at this point in the series) is when it personally affects him or he feels familiar pity for her. (First Day Frights and The Best Concert Ever are good examples of this) He's not completely won over by her antics yet. And while he is concerned for her wellbeing at this point, it's more like the sort of concern and worry you feel when you see somebody who's clearly not gonna be able to make the entire 5k run. Like you're worried but it's better if you just don't get involved. Baseline empathy, really

He does start cracking when Molly asks if she can tell Libby because she's misinterpreting the situation. Even during this, Molly doesn't break Scratch's trust and doesn't outright tell her without asking first. Knowing what we know about Scratch now, I think he's always had a soft spot for friendships and hates seeing them end, even subconsciously. He smiles as Molly runs away to catch up with Libby but he's still not happy about it. Yeah he warms up to Libby but telling anyone about him is a potential danger, especially if they feel the need to tell anyone else.

And in Friend-Off, he didn't really have a justifiable reason to be a jerk to Libby other than Molly's scavenger hunt they were both forced to do. Everything he said (both of them said really) was out of a place of pure jealousy. He even admits that at the end of the episode.

What's important to point out is this entire episode he's only thinking about himself (not an uncommon trend for this character) and is only willing to sacrifice when pushed to do so. Not saying he's necessarily written badly in this episode, far from it, but it is quite a contrast between that and his actions in the season 2 episode 5a segment I Wanna Dance With Some-Ollie.

I'd like to preface this with one of the scrapped titles for this ep was "Molly's Choice" and I think that will haunt me till I die that's such an evil title

I Wanna Dance With Some-Ollie is a VERY compelling episode. While the set up for it and Scratch the Surface is similar, this one feels like it has more stakes involved. Molly has a crush on Oliver Chen, a ghost hunter, and you can see how that could immediately cause issues. Scratch is even more dismissive towards Molly at points because of this, even colder and snappier than some of season 1a in my opinion. (For good reason obviously) and while Scratch's concerns here are mostly fear for his own safety, it's also jealousy. If he was so worried about Ollie catching him, he wouldn't be around him at all, let alone trying to sabotage the dance.

Molly doesn't take the threat the Chens pose very seriously and dismisses most of Scratch's concerns. (Not that she's a bad friend for this, she just thinks they're silly YouTubers and wants to enjoy a middle school dance) Scratch eventually blows up on her and they get into a rather brutal argument for an episode 5 of a DTVA show. It's presented in the usual silly way but they both say some rather insensitive things to each other in the heat of the moment.

We've NEVER seen them disagree this hard on anything. They've had differing opinions before but neither of them is budging on this one. They split off and you can see what Molly said to him hurt. She seemingly chose what was more important to her. He seemed to look back as if he was debating on going back in to apologize to her for what he said and did too because she just wants to have a good time and he was trying to ruin that. But he decides he's the last thing she needs right now and starts to go home, only to get caught in a spectral snare.

Here's the REALLY important part I need y'all to listen closely:

He had every right to an "I told you so". He had every right to tell her never to see Ollie again and to even consider moving just to save his metaphorical skin. But he doesn't. She apologizes first and he interjects with his own apology for trying to ruin her night. Her happiness is what's most important to him now. That priority shift happened since Out of House and Home, maybe arguably even sooner. He doesn't tell her never to see him again, in fact he IMPLIES that she should be able to do what she wants and he wouldn't interfere anymore. It was Molly's choice to cut it off with Ollie after seeing Scratch in that much danger.

He's still a self centered jerk with possessive tendencies and separation anxiety but it's important to point out that he recognizes Molly as her own person and he shouldn't interfere with her happiness. I think season 1a Scratch wouldn't have even LET her go to the dance with a ghost hunter as her co-chair to begin with. I know I don't need to defend Scratch's actions since most people are on his side in this episode (a weird change of pace) but I needed to get my thoughts out about him and his development so far. My boy has come so far, they feel like good, real friends. Also I'm just gonna reiterate Molly wasn't completely at fault here because she just wanted to enjoy the dance and both her and Scratch had equal fault in this scenario, that's called ✨good writing✨, you don't have to pick a side. THE WORLD ISN'T BLACK AND WHITE, OLLIE

I hope they address Scratch's jealous nature in a future episode, especially since they're hinting towards an Ollie redemption. After the ghost hunting fear is gone, that jealousy is gonna still be there, I'm kind of hoping after that talk outside of the school where Scratch resigned himself to whatever Molly wanted to do, he wouldn't be too jealous of him and we won't have a Friend-Off 2 or something. (Although if he decides to be a little petty and messes with Ollie a little, I welcome that. That sounds really funny honestly)

I feel like halfway through this I just started rambling, I hope my point made it across clearly LOL tldr; scratch is a well written character and he means so much to me and if I see any Molly/Ollie/Mollie slander on my account I will be throwing hands <3

#the ghost and molly mcgee #tgamm #tgamm spoilers #tgamm season 2 #long reads #character analysis #scratch mcgee #and i care them so much #the besties ever #im so excited for this season #i think about 5a a lot if you cant tell #i have many thoughts and hate seeing this ep misrepresented #which i see often #thank you for reading

57 notes · View notes

illfoandillfie · 2 years

Text

Kinktober Day 1: Just Married

Kinktober Masterlist | Regular Masterlist

Pairing: Ben Hardy x Reader

Words: 1517

Warnings: semi public sex, thats about it tbh lmao

A/N: It’s that time of the year again folks! I’m very excited about what I’ll be posting over the next month but we’re kicking off with something a little on the romantic side. It’s a bit cute I think. But ofc I had to pick Ben for this one since he’s the only man I would ever consider marrying.

It was a good thing that everyone expected you and Ben to be totally wrapped up in each other. Ben’s horny looks were easily mistaken for love struck glances at his new wife. He’d had his hand on your thigh pretty much all through the dinner and speeches, only pulling it away when it was time to cut the cake. You’d gently stroked the back of his hand to let him know he could keep it in place, although whenever it rose a little too high you had to stop him. But you couldn’t blame him for trying. You were just as horny as he was. Hard not to be after two weeks of celibacy.

Originally, you’d planned to abstain from sex for a month leading up to the wedding. Surprisingly, it had been Ben’s idea. A friend of his had gone on about how the first-time-as-a-married-couple sex was so much more incredible when you’d not had sex around the time of the wedding and Ben had been taken with it. So you’d planned a whole month of not sleeping together. Except then there’d been a party and you’d both drunk a little and ended up having a tipsy fuck the moment you got home. So you’d decided two weeks of celibacy would be enough. And you’d been right. Two weeks was plenty of time to have both of you so worked up you were fighting the urge to give each other handjobs under the table while your maid of honour and best man made toasts.

There were bound to be photos of you and Ben leaning in to whisper to each other, looking sickeningly smitten and smiling uncontrollably. Only you and he knew that more than half of the whispers were innuendo or outright admittance of wanting certain body parts. And then, when just saying how desperately you wanted each other wasn’t enough, planning for how to find some time alone. It was rapidly becoming clear that waiting until you were on your honeymoon was not going to work. You’d combust long before then. You needed something sooner than that, just a quickie to get you through.

It was even worse when you stood up and started moving around. You could feel how wet you were just from his fingers brushing over your thigh. Ben kept his arm wrapped around your waist like you were his anchor, keeping him from drifting too far into fantasy. Or perhaps he already had a semi and was using you as a shield, it was hard to tell through your dress. You did an admirable job of pretending you weren’t constantly thinking about Ben’s cock, but his breathy laugh against your ear as you talked to loved ones, and the warmth of his hands as he pulled you in close to dance made you shiver with how badly you wanted him alone.

It was while you were moving away from the dancefloor that Ben leaned in close, his voice only just loud enough for you to hear over the noise of the hall, “Men’s room?” You blinked and twisted your neck to try to see him better, not sure you’d heard him correctly. He subtly tilted his head in the direction of the bathrooms, his hand slipping low on your back, just shy of an inappropriate touch. “Ohhhhh,” you said in dawning realisation, “Yes, definitely.” He chuckled at how emphatic you were and then took your hand in his, leading you towards the edge of the room. He looked around a little as you tried to navigate the room without being seen, “Shit. Incoming.” Before you could ask what he meant you heard your names from someone standing to your left. “Ben, Y/N,” the woman said, beaming as she reached to grab one of each of your hands, “What a beautiful ceremony. Congratulations.” “Aw, thanks Aunt Polly,” Ben said, “glad you could make it.” “Oh I wouldn’t have missed it. Been saying for years you two should get a move on and tie the knot.” Ben laughed sheepishly but before he could respond further she was continuing. “Been saying you’ll make such adorable babies – when you’re ready to have them of course. Not that you can always plan for them. My Helen was a honeymoon baby and we definitely didn’t expect her. Thought we’d have a few years before a baby came along. But c'est la vie. Now where was it you two were going for your honeymoon? Your mother was telling me the other day. Paris was it? Or was that my friend Brenda’s son?” “Sorry, Aunt Pol,” Ben said, quickly cutting across before her monologue could go any further, “There’s a bit of an issue we’ve got to deal with. Nothing big,” he assured at her sudden worried expression, “just the caterers are getting the tea and coffee and cake set up soon and needed to check something with us.” “Oh of course dear, go,” Polly made a shooing motion with her hands, “organising nights like this take a lot of work and coordination, I understand.” “Thanks,” you managed to get out before Ben was whisking you off, muttering under his breath about how his balls were turning blue.

Thankfully you made it to the bathroom without another interruption. Ben peeked inside to check the coast was clear before hurrying you through the door and then into a stall. “Cosy,” you quipped as he locked the door and turned to face you. “Funny, he managed to get out just before his lips crashed into yours, his hands already busy trying to ruck up the layers of your white dress. You giggled against his lips and began fumbling for his belt. It was cramped within the stall and your dress was more in the way than you’d have liked but there was no time or space to undress. You ended up bracing your hands on the cistern while Ben slid into you from behind, both of you taking a moment to sigh with how good it felt. But you were very aware that someone could want to legitimately use the bathroom any moment so Ben quickly got to work, pulling out carefully and then thrusting forward quickly, finding a rhythm and worked for both of you. You let out a small moan, pressing the back of your hand to your lips the moment it slipped out. “Careful wife,” Ben said softly, leaning forward, “don’t wanna get busted.” “Sorry husband,” you half whispered, half laughed, “you just fill me so well.” Ben groaned at your words, burying his face into your neck to muffle himself. You’d have returned his reprimand, reminded him he could be loud on the honeymoon, but he took that moment to wrap his arm tighter around your waist, pulling you backwards onto his cock. All you could do was whimper, readjusting your hands on the cistern to keep yourself steady. Which was made all the harder when Ben grabbed one of your wrists and moved your hand towards your cunt. “Rub your clit, honey, want to feel you cum on my cock.” It took a moment to get your fingers under your skirts but when you did you stroked your fingers along your slit until they brushed over the last inch or so of Ben’s cock as he pulled out a little so he could sink back in. You could feel the curly hair around his base and your own slick on his length before it disappeared into your warm heat once more. “Call me your wife again,” you murmured, finally dragging your fingers up to your clit. “Come for me, wife,” he almost growled, “show me how much your love your husbands cock.” That made you whine, though your fingers rubbing over your clit contributed too, as well as how Ben felt moving inside you. It lasted a little longer, Ben urging you on as he tried to hold off his own impending orgasm. Finally you were there, whimpering into his palm as he covered your mouth in case a noise slipped out. Moments later he groaned into your shoulder as he came himself, holding you tight as aftershocks shot through you with each slight shift of his hips.

"Worth waiting for,” Ben said softly, pressing a kiss to your shoulder, “new wife.” You clenched in response, surprised by how the words excited you. “And very good to know I’ve got a new phrase to make you wet,” Ben laughed, carefully pulling out. “Don’t abuse your power,” you laughed, playfully reaching behind your to slap his side. Ben rearranged your underwear and then let your skirts drop, smoothing his hands over your hips as he turned you around to kiss you sweetly. “Nice try, husband,” you said, exaggerating the last word, “but I’m not spending the rest of my reception worrying about cum soaking through my underwear.” you reached for some toilet paper, “hold my skirts up please.” “Allow me,” Ben laughed, dutifully taking the toilet paper from your hand and squatting down to help clean up his mess as you rucked up your skirts again.

#My writing #my fics #ben hardy x reader #ben hardy smut #ben hardy imagine #kinktober 2022

122 notes · View notes

solargeist · 2 years

Note

is there any context I can give for this? no, it just showed up in my head so I decided to bring it here. I am still rotating these two around in my mind at top speeds.

so uh. in simple terms, things are, for the most part, a little better between them now. there's still a lingering kind of tension going on between them, but it's different (more of the "how deep do your feelings go? am I reading too deep into things or is there a chance these feelings are shared?" kind). it's the kind of tension that needs something big to really break it down.

and. well. one could say that big thing happens when the power cuts out one night.

it's too quiet, it's hard for either one of them to really focus on anything besides their own thoughts, and that's just a bit too much. Manuel's staring at his work like he'll actually be able to do it in the dark, like he'd actually be able to focus on it. Piper sneaks in because her room's too quiet and usually he's doing something idly as he works (pen taps, foot taps, hums--he makes some kind of noise when he's lost in focus).

that's what she tells herself, anyway; that she's coming to see him because the noise will distract her, even when there isn't any noise coming from him because he isn't working. it's not because--oh who is she kidding, she wants to try and say something to him, but it's so quiet she can barely find the right words--

he seems to have the same kind of tension running through him, because he abruptly asks if she can dance with him. even though there's no music playing because his radio won't play without power. this fact is immediately acknowledged, but neither exactly refuses the offer.

and the thing is, it should be awkward, it should be unbearable to be left with nothing but their silence...but somehow it slips into a different kind of comfort. the rain has fallen to a light drizzle outside, gently pattering against the window as Piper's head rests against Manuel's chest in the gentle sway (his heartbeat is almost lulling, but the last thing she wants to do is mess up her pace because of the calm it provides). she's humming something--she doesn't know what, but he is humming with her--and only stops when she feels him shift to look at her.

he is still holding her close to him, but something about the way his hand cradles her face makes her feel truly held...it's something she finds hard to pin, but she barely has the chance to question what the feeling is before she feels his lips press against hers.

she freezes. so lost in the shock of it, she barely has a chance to react before he pulls back, a look of fear in his eyes as he wonders if he just undid everything they had managed to fix.

"I--I didn't even ask, I just assumed you--I'm--"

"Do that again."

it's hard to tell who's more shocked by Piper's words that follow Manuel's shortened apology, but she refuses to back down now.

"Can you do that again?" a pause. "Please?"

he catches the nervousness in her tone despite the humor in her eyes, and something about it is enough to spark the surge of bravery to give the comfort he'd yearned to give.

he does not need to be asked twice.

both hands cradle her face as he brings her back to him, her hands grasping at his shirt. his kiss is careful but lingering, and it's only when she pulls him closer to her that the kiss allows itself to become something more tender.

the room is just barely illuminated by the moonlight, but what it provides when they pull apart just enough to look at each other is something outright beautiful as the pair can't help but beam. her arms are quick to wrap around him fully as one of his hands carefully rests against her back, pulling her closer to him...

the power comes back on.

the bright lights and abrupt arrival of song startle the pair out of the second kiss, but they can't help but laugh in each other's arms.

when characters ask their love interest to kiss them and say "please" ,,, i lose my mind, kicking my legs and giggling

#ask #bloglore

41 notes · View notes

euphoricfilter · 1 year

Note

Omg yes to the recent asks and replies for Yoongi’s drabble! I love them. I really love the idea of him doing things like washing her hair and petting her when he’s not busy with idol work. Him casually saying he’s her pet in public yes. The getting into a relationship without confessing trope lol. Would either ever properly confess to each other? Would they say I love you to each other? Maybe while they’re having sex mc would say it hm. And leashes omg. I love it. I like the idea of mc walking like a dog esp outside with the leash but hm outside isn’t really realistic. Maybe more of an extension of the collar for pulling at some point. Maybe he uses it to pull for mc to craw to him. (Not too much right?) Just her being at his feet as much as possible omg yes. Him feeding her at his feet when they’re alone. Would he ever stop working as an idol to stay with her? I think he wouldn’t really like to dance but he loves music. so he could become a producer or solo artist? (Ot7 tho :/) Or does he just take her with him when they go on trips? He’s so hot and cool (and sweaty sometimes yes lol) when he performs but what about his needy puppy :/ bet mc loves seeing him perform and gets so needy esp when it’s more of a cool, sweaty type of performance. Would she have to hold back bc of the other people? Would he be able to tell and how would he react? Or would she try to tease him to do a quickie in a private place? How would he react to seeing mc get jealous and maybe her saying she’s jealous to him? Or vice versa?

-🖤

idk if either of them would confess, i think there would just be mutual understanding that yeah this is what we have even if neither of us have explicitly said anything

oooh i think yoongi would be the first one to say i love you, definitely letting it slip by accident but i doubt the m/c would notice, and just say it back, to yoongi’s surprise. i think she’d say it most though, especially when yoongi fucks her just right

i think if yoongi wasn’t so jealous he would make her walk around on a leash but it’s like his little guilty pleasure and would absolutely hate if anyone else were to ever see the m/c like that

ooo i feel like he wouldn’t even need an extension of the collar, mf would say crawl and that’s all it’ll take for her to be on her hands and knees 😭 RAH HIM FEEDING HER THATS YUMMY

uhh i doubt he’d quit it as an idol, especially because he’s still very group oriented and unless the ready of the guys wanted to split up then i doubt he’d just decide to stop being an idol, i think maybe it would be like now— where they’ve all slowed down a little, not necessarily conforming to the idol industry’s standards of having 2-3 comebacks a year where you’re constantly in practice and promotions

if she were still to be his manager then she would go with him anyways, but say she quits the job and yoongi provides for both of them, the company probably wouldn’t like the fact an ex-employee is trailing after yoongi like a lost dog but i think he’d take her with him anyways especially if it were abroad

no because you know the m/c is rutting against her hand when yoongi is performing, i imagine her to be so horny, like all the time that she just can’t help herself, maybe he like on the edge corners of the chair, literally anything to feel some sort of release as she watches yoongi perform

i think maybe he’d catch her rocking against her hands during rehearsals or something and then make it point to make it a show just to rile her up even more

she wouldn’t even need to tease him 😭 he’s always ready for his cock in her mouth. all she ever has to do is look up at him through her lashes and he’s a goner.

yoongi would fuck her so hard when he catches her being jealous, probably a lot of teasing but he’d make sure she only remembered his name as he thrusts into her because how could his puppy be so stupid and think he had eyes for another person :( i don’t think she’d ever outright admit she’s jealous but like all her over habits yoongi would catch onto how she is when she’s feeling a little jealous and then make sure to soothe her with a few kisses before he shoves his cock down her throat for good measure

the m/c would probably get super giggly if she ever saw yoongi jealous, sloppy kisses to his neck, and maybe she gets a little carried away and ends up leaving a hickey or three on his neck and then she’d be all riled up again and maybe if yoongi’s feeling a little mean he’ll watch her get herself off on his thigh

#ask #🖤 anon #pretty puppy

4 notes · View notes

kob131 · 2 years

Note

Follow up: if you don't like Claude NOW you really won't like him in Three Hopes. Like legit, for a good couple of moments he singlehandedly ceased the Edelgard vs Dimitri discourse and united both sides against him. Funnily apropos in my opinion. If I could describe him, he's not necessarily AS ruthless as Edelgard but he's definitely just as dirty at least from a political angle.

I can 100% see that.

You know what, I'm gonna gather all my thoughts on Claude here and now so people can understand.

Originally I didn't mind Claude much in the Crimson Flower route. He and Dimitri, like Edelgard in Verdant Wind, were basically non-entities so I had no reason to dislike him. In the war period, he had far less time dedicated to him than Dimitri, who didn't have much in the first place. By the end, I thought he was an alright guy and given that I looked him up beforehand, I believed that the Verdant Wind route could make a good case for him.

I am currently at Chapter 14 and I highly doubt it. Claude is a deeply annoying and frustrating character. The guy early on has a few moments were he acts like he's going to do some shady and dishonorable shit but he never does. I'm guessing this is supposed to make him out to be the 'dashing rogue' type that he's designed as. But what it actually does is make Claude a dumbass because he knows people are biased against Almyrans and he wants to change that but these acts just give the people around him every reason to be biased against him even WITHOUT knowing his heritage. Just as well, I don't think Claude actually reveals his heritage to anyone in game outside of Byleth (though to be fair, he seems to imply it post-game for Hilda and Leonie at least). If he does in the main game I'll say otherwise but given his Byleth support- I doubt it.

And even if I were to ignore how Claude's general attitude shoots his own ideals in the foot, his goal is basically impossible. He wants to unite Foldan as well as the world to get rid of prejudice. Problem is- One would think that looking at the divided Foldan would hammer into his head: 'Hey...things aren't that simple, are they?' That maybe Claude would instead try to just start making the slow process of opening up the world so things can get better over time right? ... Nah, such complicated things are for lesser beings. Claude is Claude so even despite the fact that he's shooting himself in the foot all the time, he seems to come out on top no matter what!

And I do mean, no matter what. Because in any route besides hers, Edelgard will die. In any route not his, Dimitri will die. In most routes, Rhea can die without a high enough support. In all routes, Claude lives. No really, it's canon that Claude lives in all routes. A trait completely unique to him as a Lord. Going even further, Claude is by far treated with the softest touch by the narrative. In all routes, he's depicted, at worst, as just a good guy trying his best. In all routes, he's the one dragging you onto the dance floor as clearly the fun loving guy. In all routes, his foes don't like fighting him even though other people would make more sense (like Edelgard and Dimitri). This is the key difference between him and Edelgard. Unlike her, where she does show some kind of weakness or vulnerability on her route and outright negative traits on the others- Claude lacks that.

I'll be blunt- the guy comes across as a Mary Sue.

In a previous post, I mentioned that Verdant Wind reminded me of Devil Survivor's Law route. I'll explain here: In Devil Survivor's Law Route, not only do you get an unambiguously good, feel good ending but you also get a proper resolution to the backstory of how your protagonist came to get the power of Bel and their connection to Nayoa. Contrast this with the Chaos route (which lacks the happy ending unless you play the Overlord route in the 8th day AND lacks any major lore), The Neutral Route (which lacks any lore outside it's own characters) and the Atsuro route (which is unique). This alongside the fan favorite Amane being your ally as well as getting the character best suited for the Recarm Loop strategy for the Lucifier superboss. All of this despite the Angels being the worst of the factions, being the ones RESPONSIBLE for trapping you inside the Yamato circle and basically killing whoever doesn't fit their absurd standards while blaming everyone else.

It's the same here. Crimson Flower and (presumably) Azure Moon lack any major reveal of lore and it seems even Silver Snow is more solemn than Verdant Wind. It kind of feels like if you aren't doing the original Silver route, you're pushed to Verdant Wind and Claude. This in spite of the fact that Claude is the worst of the Lords and Rhea.

Could I be wrong and full of it? Completely yes and I welcome any rebuttals though I will push back if I feel that I was not proven wrong. But as for now: i can totally see the Dimitri fans with their better character development and the Edelgard fans with the whole rebel appeal setting their philosophical differences aside to beat the shit out of Claude.

4 notes · View notes

galaxytittus · 25 days

Note

📩 Simblr question of the day: A sim of your choice from your blog just got hard-core broken up with by the sim/person they thought was gonna be their lifelong lover ( this could be an imaginary sim/person or their current partner, and this could be just a really heartfelt breakup or your sim couldve caught them cheating, whatever breakup you want :) ). What is their first reaction? Do they feel anger? Sadness? Are they so upset they're just numb? Do they do anything drastic?🌿

( Freely share this SQOTD around, anon or not and use the hashtag " SQOTD " ~ 💛 )

Hey, thanks for the ask! I don't develop Maple enough, so I'll do if Remi were to break up with her (and consequently, if she found out about him and Pepper)! As for the reason why he'd break up with her, I mean... it's Remi. 😭

Remi would probably try to lay this on her as gently as possible, dancing around the subject in hopes she will just "get it." Maple is already constantly terrified he's going to leave her for seemingly no reason (for the second time) so she would catch on quickly without him really saying it outright. She'd definitely immediately EXPLODE at even the suggestion of ending things. I'm talking screaming in his face, hitting him, throwing his clothes out the window, putting sugar in his gas tank, burning his driver's license, anything she can think of. She sees losing Remi as losing her apartment, her car, all her income, all her friends, along with her boyfriend/baby daddy, so at that point she would have nothing to lose. She would make sure he didn't make it out of the separation with ANYTHING. And all of this would be before she makes the mistake of confiding in Vladdie and Pepper.

Vlad would get so furious for her that in his incoherent, angry rambling, the dreaded Pepper/Remi thing would accidentally slip out. Then my poor angel baby's world would be totally crushed; her relationships with the three people she trusted most all completely destroyed with the realization she's been lied to by everyone around her for over a decade. She'd vow herself to never trust them or anyone ever again, cutting contact with everyone and disowning Pepper and Vlad as her brothers. At the end of everything, she'd most likely move back home, where Francis would be all too eager to take care of her and his grandchild's every need. So... at least she has him :D

#in canon Remi knows Vlad is just ITCHING for a reason to kill him so he's not gonna give him one breaking up w Maple lmaoo #ask #anon #sqootd #remi #maple #pepper #vlad #oc lore

1 note · View note

88m33 · 3 months

Text

February 6, 2024

I've learned a lot over the last year.

I don't understand how people can separate the person from their body. I mean the body and the mind are one and should be treated as such, but that's not the case for many people.

It's been thirteen months since a man tried to use me to cheat on his girlfriend and I've been trying to heal from that. He tried to convince me to sleep with him because I had feelings for him and he knew that and wanted to take advantage of it. I couldn't look at my own reflection for a while without feeling disgusted with myself for not realizing how awful he truly was before then.

It's been eleven months since I briefly dated a fuckboy who couldn't get me to fuck him. He was boring and kinda dumb but he made me feel desirable again for just a moment. And then he blocked me because I didn't sleep with him fast enough. To be fair, he never asked, so that's his fault.

It's been ten months since I met a man I still think could be the love of my life if he wanted to be. Tall, inteligent, attractive, and Italian. I didn't know I had a thing for Italian men until I met him. He asked me to hang out and study with him and would tell me I was so smart. He showed up at my graduation on his own accord--I didn't even invite him. But he left America and things changed. He rarely talks to me and I feel like I'm bothering him when I reach out. He leaves me on delivered for a month and then just texts me out of nowhere. I think he might have a girlfriend that he won't tell me about. He asked me to learn Italian once and told me he'd let me know if he comes to Los Angeles. I'm angry at him more than I am happy he's in my life but for some reason we can't seem to let go of each other.

It's been two months since I made out with a stranger for the first time. It was eye-opening for me. I was attractive to other people, even if it was just my body and for the night. He was from Spain and touched my face in a way that made me feel things I cannot explain. He wasn't that attractive and he wasn't that great of a kisser, but he told me I was beautiful and that's what I needed.

It's been one month since I almost went home with a girl. She told me I was hot and sexy in a club bathroom and I appreciated that she told me outright that she wanted to sleep with me, rather than the way men try to allude to it in the strangest ways. I didn't end up sleeping with her, but it left me on a high for then next month. I reveled in the sounds she made when I bit her lips and prided myself in being able to do that to someone.

It has been almost three weeks since a good friend of mine kissed me. He was getting out of a situationship with another of my friends and all of our friends had left us at the bar without saying goodbye. So instead of just going home we got drunk and went to the gay bars and danced. I was dancing with some girl when he got jealous and tried to walk away. I told him I wasn't going to leave the bar without him and eventually we walked away from the bars hand in hand. He stopped me and sat down on a half wall and placed me in between his legs. He put his hands on the back of my thighs and put his head on my chest. He kissed up my arms and even bit me softly to make me laugh. I tried to ask him what he was trying to do and he was just saying we were gonna figure it out. At some point, he had his hand on the back of my neck as we walked to our cars and then his arms around my waist. when we got to his car, he wrapped his arms around me and placed my hand on his face. And then he kissed me--just once, just small. But I knew something was up because he wouldn't have done that sober. He was just lonely because the girl he wanted ended things with him. So I told him he needed to go home and he was calling me sexy and asking for one more kiss. I drove home and got a text from the girl he wanted the next morning asking if I was okay. He had called her from a parking lot at seven in the morning and told her that we were hanging out the night before. I don't know what he told her. I hope he didn't tell her anything because she's a close friend of mine and I know they aren't over each other. We've never talked about it.

It has been three days since my date with the girl from a month ago. She said she was excited to see me and she obviously liked me because she wouldn't have kissed me if she didn't. We went to dinner and I thought it went well, but after dinner she told me that she wasn't feeling the vibe and was going to go home. I offered to drive her home and she paid for dinner for rejecting me to my face. She still wants to stay friends but she doesn't like me in that way. I cried myself to sleep that night.

This isn't even a recap of the friendship problems I've had. I've been dropped for no reason and hated for no reason and given apologies that led to nothing. I spend a lot of time alone but I have good long-distance friends. I've learned that people take advantage of kind, good-natured people and throw them out at the slightest sign of disagreement. I've learned that some people can act like they like me and then ask that you not be invited to things. I've learned that sometimes people just don't like you, even if you did absolutely nothing to deserve it.

How am I supposed to feel lovable if people only want me for the things I can give them? I can give rides to the store and my last cup of sugar and my money for a drink and my body for you to hold. People don't want me for who I am.

0 notes

kazeokami · 10 months

Text

What even was a mother, anyhow? He knew what it was, in concept; had seen them clasping the hands of their children as they happily walked through the streets and had felt his heart constrict at the sight.

That should have been him. Had all been well, it would have been him, clasping Ei's hand in his and skipping along without a care in the world and feeling completely enveloped in her love. But fate was cruel and unforgiving and she'd gotten rid of him because he was weak- she could try to hide behind her excuses of giving him free will and not wanting to interfere with his fate; he wasn't stupid. Ei didn't love him, and it made him angrier she couldn't just outright say that instead of dancing around the truth.

He hated her. Hated her for never being there when she needed him, for seeing his tears as incompletion, for her hundreds of years of silence. He'd gone and raised hell in her - his, ...THEIR home. Inazuma was their home..... he'd tried to claw it down with his bare hands, and she STILL did nothing. Why?? Was he not worth her attention?? Did she care that little? It didn't matter. He would be better. He would tear down the gods and the world with his hands and then rebuild it and reshape it, and it would be better. HE would be better than she had ever been. That'd show her. That'd show her.

He hates her so much.

But he misses her, too.

...can you miss someone you never knew? Can you mourn the loss of one who has not died?? Maybe. Maybe so. He wants her to take him in her arms and tell him she's proud of him, that he is her son, and nothing will ever change that; but she won't, she won't, because he will not allow himself to be that vulnerable. She doesn't deserve it. But god, he misses her - thinks about what could have been, if things were better.

He..wants her to tell him "I love you". To kiss his forehead and gently wipe away his tears and tell him everything will be okay but she won't. She won't. It doesn't matter. He doesn't need her, he never did he-

..why does everything hurt??? Why is he crying? She's a horrible person and a horrible mother and - ... and despite that, he misses her, though he clings to his hatred like it keeps him alive (maybe it does. maybe it DOES flow through his veins like blood and propel him forward). He wants his mother and he hates the fact that he does: he feels weak, hollow (ha. fitting), and he wants to stop feeling he wants to stop feeling his chest is hurting and he grips it with clenched hands, willing the pain to stop.

It does not.

Maybe it never would.

Love hurts. Love hurts.

He would like to stop hurting.

#Me; rolling in on my heelies: hey guys im really sad #idk what it is but i always have the best wanderer muse when i am sad #i read a found family fic today and i legit shed tears im still thinking about it hours later #and how wanderer is so so angry with ei and yet still calls her his mother and is so hurt by her leaving im going to be ill #it hurts a lot and idk if they will ever reconcile or if wanderer even WANTS to #which. completely valid.#but just. they're both hurting a lot and they make me wanna cry and i hate this a lot #it's so funny i originally liked scaramouche because he was openly just a bastard and then they hit me with the backstory #and my brain was like oh yeah let's make this one the comfort character! idk what happened it just did #why am i like this man

1 note · View note

grxcisxhy-wp · 2 years

Text

𝖼.𝗁. | 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗇𝗀𝗌 𝖺𝗋𝖾 𝗀𝗈𝗈𝖽

back to masterlist

pairing ; calum hood x fem!reader

requested ; yes

summary ; calum seems to have never liked you, leading him to say some things he doesn't mean. so, he comes to apologize and ends up doing more than just expressing his regrets.

warnings ! SMUT, slut shaming, calum's kind of an asshole, enemies to lovers, slight biting and praising, fingering, blowjob, p in v

word count ; 2.2k

a/n ; i don't really write smut so i hope to god it's not terrible. also, i'm so sorry i made calum such an asshole.

You don’t know what you did to make Calum dislike you. Maybe he always had from the first time he saw you. Lord knows he always has something to say about the way you dress. Saying things like “you’re really going to wear that?” or something bordering along the lines of slut shaming.

He never outright called you a slut, and you figured that had something to do with the way Luke always pulled him aside before the two of them joined the rest of the group.

You had met Luke when he first moved to LA and had been friends ever since. He introduced you to his girlfriend and his bandmates and their girlfriends after about a month of knowing you. You had rode to some higher end club with him and Sierra. They reassured you the whole way there that the others would love you. They were right and everyone welcomed you with open arms.

It was the first and only time Calum had smiled at you.

You, Sierra, and Crystal parted from the boys so they could ask you questions without the boys trying to listen in. When they asked if you had a boyfriend, you admitted that you were single. They immediately shared a look before encouraging you to find a man to dance with.

After a few more shots of liquid courage, you did.

You hadn’t felt the eyes of Calum watching you as you danced provocatively with a stranger. Calum had tuned out his bandmates and focused on the way you let this random man glide his hands all over you. His jaw clenched when he saw the guy kissing your neck.

He didn’t know what came over him. He had just met you; he shouldn’t feel this possessive. But you were captivating, Calum couldn’t deny it. The glint in your eye when you introduced yourself to him, the way your hand lingered after shaking his – though, he might have imagined that.

He was so caught up with his jealous thoughts, he hadn’t even noticed you’d come back over to their table with the guy you had been dancing with.

“Hey, Luke,” you said. “Cody and I are going to head back to his hotel. I’ll text you tomorrow.”

“Okay,” Luke said. “Be safe.”

You smiled at everyone at the table one last time before letting Cody lead you out of the club.

“Does she do that all the time?” Calum asked.

“Not usually. No,” Luke said, sipping his drink.

“And you’re just fine with it?”

Luke shrugged. “She’s an adult. She can do what she wants.”

Calum dropped it after that because Luke was right. You were single and had no obligation to anyone, let alone him. But that didn’t stop him from being an asshole towards you whenever you were around.

From then on, whenever Luke would invite you to hang out and Calum would be there, he either made sure to be as far away as possible, or close enough so you could hear the snide comments he made about your outfit choice.

At some point you started dressing up in more revealing clothes just to get a rise out of him. You secretly liked the way his jaw would clench, and his nostrils would flare. It was hot in your opinion.

However, one night Calum’s comments got taken too far.

Luke had invited you to a small house party at Ashton’s place. All the people that were at the club from that first hang out would be there along with some other people you hadn’t met. You had agreed and since you knew Calum was coming you dressed in a tube top and form fitting short skirt just to see the fire light up in his eyes.

Calum had shown up late, arriving after most people were already there. He found everyone in the kitchen, eyes eventually settling on you. You were laughing along with the others at something Michael had said. After your laughter died down your eyes met the brown ones staring at you.

You smirked. “Hey, Cal.”

“Cal!” Ashton shouted. “When did you get here?”

Calum forced himself to look at Ashton. “A few minutes ago.”

“Fashionably late I see,” Michael teased.

Calum saw you snicker and couldn’t help the next words to come out of his mouth. “Well, I didn’t want to show up wearing practically two pieces of fabric.”

Luke sent Calum a warning look. “Don’t start.”

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to offend your whore of a friend.”

Your face fell as the room went silent. Sierra moved to comfort you, but you were already shuffling out of the kitchen and to the front door. She followed after you.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” Luke growled. “What did she ever do to you?”

“I, uh…” Calum stuttered, brain finally catching up with his words.

“Nothing,” Luke said. “Absolutely nothing and you treat her like garbage.”

“I’m sorry,” Calum said.

“I’m not the one who deserves an apology.” Luke followed yours and Sierra’s path out of the kitchen.

Calum looked up to see Michael and Ashton fixing him with disapproving stares.

“I thought you were better than that,” Ashton said.

Calum had nothing to say because he had thought he was better than that too.

Calum had finally convinced Luke to give him your address so he could apologize. Luke had already warned you that Calum would be coming over, so you weren’t surprised when the doorbell rang. However, you were surprised by the bouquet of flowers in one hand and a tray of coffee in the other.

“Uh, I didn’t know your order, so I just settled on a vanilla latte,” he said sheepishly, a look you hadn’t seen on him before. You couldn’t decide if you liked it or not.

“Thanks,” you said taking the tray of coffee and inviting him. You led him into your kitchen and set down the coffee.

He held out the flowers. “These are for you too.”

You smiled as you took them and got a vase ready to put them in.

“I’m pretty sure you know why I’m here,” Calum said, trying his best not to look at you. “I just wanted to say sorry. What I said was so uncalled for, and – “

“Why did you say it?” you asked. “I can never figure out what makes you hate me so much.”

“I don’t hate you,” Calum said.

“You sure act like you do.”

“I’ve never hated you,” Calum said firmly. “I guess I was jealous.”

You almost laughed. “Jealous. Of what?”

“Of all the guys that would look at you when we were out in public. Jealous of the guys you would let take you to their hotel rooms.” Calum sighed.

“And you decided slut shaming me was the best way to get my attention?”

“I’m so sorry about that. I had no right to act the way I did.”

You shrugged. “If you wanted to know if I was into degradation all you had to do was ask.”

Calum’s eyes snapped up to yours, catching the smirk on your lips.

“Are you?” he asked.

You took a step closer. “Why don’t you kiss me, and we’ll find out from there.”

Calum’s gaze drifted down to your lips as you continued to step closer until the two of you were practically chest to chest. You put a hand on his chest and gave him a smile to reassure him that this was something you wanted.

Calum’s hands moved to your neck, guiding your head closer to his. He pressed his lips to yours gently, a great contrast to how he had acted towards you before. You were the one to take it further, slipping your tongue into his mouth. Your hands slid into his hair, pulling at his curls and making him groan.

“Take me to my room,” you whispered against his lips. “It’s the first door on the left.”

Calum obliged to your request, hooking his hands underneath your thighs. You attached your lips to his neck as he tried his best to focus on getting to your room. He pushed the door open and let you flop onto the bed.

He stood in between your legs as he took his shirt off. You sat up and traced the tattoo across his chest. He grabbed your arm, bringing it up to his mouth and kissing the inside of your wrist.

“You’re beautiful,” he whispered.

You smiled. “You haven’t even seen it all yet.”

“I don’t have to. You’re beautiful.”

You couldn’t stop yourself from pulling him down to taste his lips again. “You sure know how to make a girl feel special.”

Calum laughed, his hands sliding to the hem of your shirt. “Can I?”

You nodded and he lifted your shirt over your head, throwing it somewhere in the room. He was surprised to find you were wearing no bra. His hands slid up and down your ribcage, too nervous to touch you properly.

“Calum.”

“Hm?”

“Please touch me.”

Calum nearly groaned at the desperation in your voice before his hands cupped your breasts. He massaged them, lowering his mouth to focus on one before switching to the other. He reveled in the small sighs you let out and took the risk to lightly bite your left breast. When you moaned, he did it again just to hear the pretty sound once more. The hand of his that was unoccupied by your breasts snuck down between the two of you, slipping into your pants.

Calum detached his mouth from you for a second to say, “Opting out of all undergarments today, huh?”

“The girls need to breathe,” you joked breathily, moaning when Calum’s slender fingers found your sensitive bud.

He moved his middle and ring finger down to your entrance, opening you up. As Calum pleasured you with his fingers, your own hand moved down to palm his bulge. He groaned into your chest, biting down on the skin of your breast.

Your hand moved to the button on his jeans. “Let’s get this off, shall we?”

“I couldn’t agree more,” Calum panted, moving to help get your own pants off.

Once all clothing items were removed you used your hand to guide his cock to your entrance.

“You sure you want to do this?” Calum asked. “We can stop if you want.”

“Cal, I know I shouldn’t, but I really like you,” you said.

Calum smiled. “I really like you too.”

“Then fuck me.”

Calum didn’t need to be told twice. He pushed into you, eyes closing in pleasure once he bottomed out. Your mouth was open at the feeling of being stretched out by him.

“God,” you said, bucking your hips to try and get him deeper.

He begins to set a leisure pace that has you mewling in his ear, and he swears he could burst right then. Your hands find his neck, pulling him in for a sloppy kiss as he begins to pick up the pace. You look into his eyes as you pull away and you know then and there that you could never go back from him.

“Feels so good,” you praise, your fingers digging into his shoulder blades as he hits that spot that makes you see stars.

“Fuck, you’re perfect,” he groans, forehead resting on your collarbone.

He brings a hand down to circle your clit once more, aiding you to get to your release faster.

“Cal, I’m gonna – “

“I know, pretty girl,” he said, feeling your walls tighten around him. “Cum on my cock. Wanna see how pretty you are when you cum.”

And so, you did. Calum swore he could’ve died a happy man at that exact moment seeing the way your eyes rolled back. You moaned out as Calum rode out your high, your walls gripping him deliciously.

“I’m gonna cum,” he warned. “Where do you want it?”

Instead of answering, you pushed him out of the way, kneeling in front of him. You stuck your tongue out and licked up the underside of his cock. He groaned when you took his tip in your mouth, swirling your tongue around it like a lollipop.

His fingers wove into your hair, pushing you down further onto him. “God, your mouth is amazing.”

You pulled off of him and smirked at him. He watched as you stuck your tongue out and began to jerk him off. It was when you looked up into his eyes that he released his load onto your tongue. When he had come down from his high, you cleaned up the cum that missed your mouth with your thumb, sticking it in your mouth and swallowing.

You crawled onto your bed and Calum joined you.

“I hope you know that we’re doing this again,” Calum said.

“Take me out first, Hood,” you said.

“If that’s what you want,” Calum said, “I’ll take you anywhere.”

You smiled at him. “Well, I’m fine right here.”

Calum smiled back and pulled you closer to him by the waist. Your legs tangled together as you just reveled in each other’s warmth until your phone rang. You registered Luke’s contact photo before you picked up.

“Hello, Hemmings,” you said.

“Well, you sound decently happy,” Luke said. “I take it things went alright?”

You looked at Calum who lay on your chest, about to fall asleep.

“Yeah, things are good.”

#grxcisxhy's writing #5sos #5sos x reader #calum hood #calum hood x you #calum hood x reader #calum hood x y/n #calum hood angst #luke hemmings #michael clifford #ashton irwin #e2l #enemies to lovers #calum hood smut #5 seconds of summer #calum hood fluff #calum imagine #calum hood imagine #calum hood oneshot

935 notes · View notes

likeshipsonthesea · 3 years

Text

mianmian gets to the lan sect lectures, discovers very quickly that every one of her peers has decided to use this time to figure out how quickly they can get into bed with someone of the opposite sex, and decides almost immediately that she has to pick a suitably unattainable guy to have a crush on.

the thing is, mianmian is lanling jin’s head disciple. she is capable, intelligent, and very very gay. the last of these things she isn’t exactly keen on telling people yet for a variety of reasons up to and including jin zixuan will be so awkward and stubbornly supportive about it and she doesn’t know how to deal with that yet

so when her friends giggle over the other young masters and finally turn to mianmian-- who’s trying to memorize at least some of the fifty-thousand rules before their quiz tomorrow--and they ask her, “who do you like, mianmian?” she says the name that she carefully picked out of a handful of options.

“lan-er-gongzi,” she says, without looking up from her textbook, and she assumes that will be the end of it.

lan wangji is both incredibly attractive and unrelentingly resistant to all attempts to flirt with him. she, like half the other female cultivators, can moon over him (or pretend to moon over him) all they want and nothing will come of it. it’s perfect. she’s a genius. the worst she’ll have to do now is pretend to be infatuated with him when her friends start gossiping. it’s fool proof.

spoiler: it’s not

it’s not, no, because her friends are horrible and immediately start gossiping about it to everyone, and usually mianmian wouldn’t care but then jin zixuan finds out. jin zixuan, whose marriage complex is being brought to center stage with the forced proximity to his bride-to-be. jin zixuan, who for some reason decided he has to live his stolen crush-addled youth vicariously through his only real friend that isn’t related to him. jin zixuan, who for some godforsaken reason takes it upon himself to contrive situations for mianmian and lan wangji to be alone together incessantly.

it unfortunately takes mianmian longer than she would like to figure out what’s happening. she’d give herself a break for it-- she was being responsible and studying, thank you very much-- but she doesn’t have much sympathy for her own stupidity seeing as she’s currently locked in a section of the lan library with the second jade of lan

and suddenly, suddenly she’s just so fucking tired. of studying, yeah, the tests here are brutal and there’s no one to bribe to make sure she doesn’t lose points on stupid things, but also tired of lying to the people she loves and tired of training this hard and being an amazing cultivator only for people to care more about her eventual marriage-- to a man of all things!-- and also, let’s be real here, she’s been in lectures with beautiful capable intelligent women for like months and she’s losing her gay ass mind

and so maybe, possibly, as she’s locked in a library with a clearly confused and annoyed second jade of lan she kind of, momentarily, loses it and rants all of this at his steadily widening eyes

at the end of it, she realizes with no small amount of panic that she’s just confessed not only her attraction to women but the fact that she’s been letting wen qing’s ears of all things distract her from her studies. if anything, she’s sure lan wangji will fault her for inattention

but the second jade of lan, after a drawn-out moment filled only with mianmian’s labored breathing and rising panic, simply says, “i understand.”

mianmian stops. she squints. she tilts her head. she squints some more. lan wangji’s ears go pink and just like that she realizes -- “you’re a cut-sleeve.”

lan wangji’s ears go even pinker. he doesn’t nod, or agree, or outwardly react in any way, but mianmian is a capable, intelligent cultivator, and she’s sure of it.

mianmian sighs with a relief she didn’t know she could feel. “thank the gods.”

lan wangji doesn’t seem to know what to make of this response, or mianmian’s increasingly frequent trips to the library following their conversation, or mianmian’s staunch determination to befriend the guy, but that’s alright. mianmian is old hat at befriending awkward sect heirs by this point.

it’s not like lan wangji expressed any desire for her friendship, but the prospect of not being the only one with absolutely no interest in the straight shenanigans happening at gusu lan summer camp is enough to let mianmian ignore his obvious confusion. lan wangji is a great listener and only sometimes blushes when mianmian waxes poetic about the beautiful women she’s forced to surround herself with every day

“no but you don’t understand,” mianmian insists, alone in the library with lan wangji, “jiang-guniang asked me to help her with a sword form. i put my hands on her waist. i said something idiotic bc she was so pretty and right there and then she laughed. lan wangji. i’m in love.”

“yesterday you were in love with wen-guniang,” lan wangji says as he impassively turns a page in his book. “has this changed?”

“no, i’m in love with both of them. all of them. lan wangji. they’re all so pretty all the time. it’s horrible.”

lan wangji presses his lips into a firmer line, which mianmian’s come to understand means he’s repressing a smile. “i’m sorry to hear it brings luo-guniang such trouble.”

mianmian groans, fairly undignified, but that’s a lost cause with lan wangji at this point anyway. “i swear, if jin zixuan says one more bad thing about her i’m going to punch him and marry her myself.”

lan wangji says, “mn,” which mianmian takes to mean that he supports her in this line of thinking, which she finds both quite sweet and ridiculously funny.

grinning, she teases, “lan-er-gongzi, if i do end up marrying jiang-guniang, will you bear witness to our elopement?”

lan wangji’s lips press again, this time in the way that means he’s repressing a frown. “jiang-guniang’s brothers wouldn’t allow for an elopement,” he says.

mianmian huffs. “as if yunmeng or lanling will deign to host our wedding.”

lan wangji appears to ponder this for a moment before he says, “gusu will host it,” and it’s at that moment that mianmian realizes she’s actually gone and fucking befriended the second jade of lan.

what is her life.

of course, it’s not long after that that she goes to find jin zixuan and explain that she can’t make their weekly sparring match today because she has plans with lan wangji (jiang yanli tenderly brushed some of mianmian’s hair away from her forehead while they were working on sword forms and if mianmian doesn’t tell someone about it she’s literally going to explode) and she’s trying to be as polite as possible only for jin zixuan to scoff and pout (”i don’t pout”) and say, “i never took you for one of those women who throw themselves so wantonly at a man”

it’s only for having been friends with this absolutely horrible communicator for most of her life that she doesn’t immediately punch him in the face. “what did you just say to me,” she demands, but jin zixuan just sets his jaw and looks away, flushing down his neck in the way his mother describes as unbecoming and--

and mianmian suddenly realizes that her ridiculous best friend is jealous of lan wangji.

(in a friend way, of course, he’s like her brother, the one time his mother implied that he ought not get too close to women in case it jeopardizes his betrothal to jiang yanli, he insisted he didn’t have any female friends repeatedly as his mother delicately danced around outright saying mianmian’s name until finally she broke and jin zixuan was basically like huh?? mianmian doesn’t count?? she made me eat dirt like six times when we were kids)

the sheer ridiculousness of jin zixuan, to set her up with a guy and then get jealous when she spends all her time with him

and fuck her, but she loves her stupid awkward ridiculous sect heir best friend and she doesn’t want him to think she’s gone and left him for someone else (gods know jin zixuan’s loyalty complex rivals his marriage one (on second thought the two might be connected)) and so, after making a few quick decisions, mianmian grabs her stupid best friend by the wrist and pulls him to the library

he protests all the way there, but he’s been letting her drag him wherever she wants since they were five and it isn’t as if he’s going to break the pattern now. she drags him to the library and sits him down across a startled lan wangji and then finally breaks and gushes about jiang-guniang’s fingertips brushing her forehead and doesn’t look at jin zixuan once the whole time

lan wangji, on the other hand, sends jin zixuan frequent glances, as if worried on mianmian’s behalf, which is super sweet and also how the fuck did mianmian get two awkward sect heirs to care about her platonically wtf. she spares a thought for her poor auntie, who would’ve loved to have a sect heir care about her niece in much less platonic ways.

at the end of mianmian’s rant, jin zixuan is blinking quite a lot. “you like women?” he asks. he’s always been a bit slow on the uptake. mianmian nods. “you like jiang-guniang?”

mianmian shrugs. “more or less. she’s just really pretty and i’m dying about it. it’s fine.”

lan wangji says, “mn,” sympathetically and jin zixuan continues to gape.

mianmian winces. “you’re not going to be weird about this, are you?”

jin zixuan shakes his head quickly. “no, no-- of course not, i--you know that i--you’re my best friend, i don’t care--what does it matter to me, who you want to--to touch your hair.”

it’s probably the most awkward sentence he’s said to her in years, but possibly more articulate than she’d been expecting. it makes her tear up regardless and she punches him in the shoulder to hide it, and that’s basically how the three of them start hanging out in the library nearly every day after lecture.

sometimes they go to the sparring ground, bc who’s better sparring practice than the second jade of lan? and sometimes (once or twice) mianmian manages to convince lan wangji to join her and jin zixuan for lunch in caiyi town when they don’t have lecture, but mostly they meet in a secluded part of the library where mianmian can rant about how pretty all the women at lectures are, jin zixuan can turn pink whenever she mentions jiang-guniang, and lan wangji can “mn” and nod sympathetically at all the right parts

and mianmian thinks that’s going to be the end of it, they’re just going to be friends now and everything else will move on as usual, bc by some ridiculous trick of fate lan wangji and jin zixuan seem to like each other. which makes sense in hindsight bc they’re both awkward sect heirs who care about cultivation and people a lot even if they’re not great at showing it

(and he’d never say it but mianmian thinks jin zixuan’s easy acceptance of her liking women is probably the first time lan wangji’s ever seen someone accept that kind of thing before (maybe, possibly, other than his brother, lan xichen seems really cool, even if he does smile kind of intensely at mianmian whenever he happens upon her hanging out with his little brother.))

so they’re friends, they’re unexpected friends, and sometimes lan wangji even makes jokes in that dry deadpan way of his and sometimes jin zixuan doesn’t completely trip over his own words and manages to act like a normal human being and mianmian gets two idiots to care about and a perfect place to vent her womanly frustrations, and she thinks that’s the end of it and then wei wuxian accosts her after lectures one day

“do you like lan zhan?” he asks accusingly, eyes narrowed to slits. “what am i even asking, of course you like lan zhan, but do you like-like him?”

mianmian thinks sadly to herself that she’s much too into women to be dealing with all these men’s emotional problems. “lan wangji is my friend,” she says, carefully sidestepping wei wuxian, who continues to squint at her suspiciously. really, he’d been amusing when he flirted with her, but this? this is just ridiculous.

“does he know that?” wei wuxian asks. “because if he doesn’t, that’s just leading him on, and it’s really not nice to--”

“lan wangji knows we’re friends,” she says, trying to enunciate to get her point across clearly. “you can ask him, if you don’t believe me.”

wei wuxian squints a moment longer before he turns and flounces off. mianmian thinks this is the end of it until she’s accosted again after dinner with, “he said you were friends!”

for some reason, wei wuxian seems even more troubled by this than earlier. mianmian tries to suppress her eyeroll. “i told you he would?”

“but how,” wei wuxian says, suddenly whining. “i’ve been trying to be his friend for months and he refuses to acknowledge me.”

oh, mianmian realizes with a quickly dawning horror. she and lan wangji are not the only cut-sleeves at cloud recesses this summer. (she has suspicions, of course, but no confirmations on any of the others, but this. wow.)

she also realizes, decides really, that she has enough repressed sect heirs in her life and she cannot deal with wei wuxian’s cut-sleeve crisis or his evidently large attachment to lan wangji right now. she turns decisively and walks the fuck away. not her problem.

the lectures end eventually, of course, and mianmian and jin zixuan return to lanling with a horde of golden robed disciples, freshly deflowered and not all together more learned. it’s what, she thinks grimly, their sect leader would want.

the first few weeks go by and she realizes that she’s missed unloading about her frequent and fast falling-in-loves. jin zixuan just doesn’t sympathize right, bless him, and so mianmian takes to writing letters. she sends two without receiving a reply and just starts to write the third when a letter with the gusu symbol is delivered to her room.

she’s almost expecting to find a single mn written on the page-- she would’ve been delighted with just that, actually, the sheer hilarity of such a thing-- but instead she finds several pages filled with lan wangji’s perfect calligraphy.

it’s more than he’s ever spoken out loud, but it seems that propriety dictated that he return mianmian’s extensive letter with one of his own and he’s done so admirably. he responds to the events mianmian detailed in her letters-- most succinctly summarized as, woman are gorgeous and i’m dying-- and then writes about his own life in cloud recesses. apparently, he went on a little night hunt with wei wuxian and also nie huaisang and jiang cheng were involved? seriously, mianmian misses out on all the fun.

he’s also apparently taken in some rabbits, which mianmian immediately decides she needs to see. lan wangji, sitting prim and proper, with a bunch of rabbits in his lap? amazing. wei wuxian would die on sight, she’s sure of it.

he also ends his letter with a warning about qishan wen that has mianmian frowning. she takes it to jin zixuan who reads the paragraph and frowns. “i’ll talk to my father about it,” he says, which she can tell by his hunched shoulders he doesn’t expect to do much.

“talk to your father’s general too,” she suggests, because that man at least thinks with his head and not his dick.

jin zixuan nods but doesn’t hand back the letter. he skims it instead with a barely concealed surprise at lan wangji’s previously hidden expansive vocabulary. mianmian snorts and grabs the letter back. “you can write to him yourself, you know.”

jin zixuan flushes down his neck. “i know!” he insists and then turns and runs away because he’s a coward. mianmian shakes her head, smiling. what an idiot.

still, another week goes by and a letter arrives from gusu and, when mianmian takes it, assuming it’s for her, she finds it addressed to jin zixuan in lan wangji’s impeccable calligraphy and she grins to herself like an idiot. look at jin zixuan, making friends

(she suddenly understands why lan xichen gave her all those intense smiles during the lan lectures)

they go on in this way, writing letters to lan wangji from lanling. sometimes mianmian steals jin zixuan’s letters before he sends them so she can squeeze in some ranting in the post script without wasting a whole second thing of paper, and lan wangji replies dutifully, more verbose than he ever was in person, and it’s nice okay, like. she and jin zixuan have been best friends since they were kids but neither of them has ever been any good at listening and lan wangji is just so honest and earnest in everything, like they didn’t realize that people outside of lanling were actually not always plotting your downfall??? who woulda thunk

and then of course the wens go and ruin everything. they go to the wen lectures bc jin guangshan doesn’t want to “anger our trading partner” like the guy isn’t obviously going to burn carp tower to the ground the first chance he gets, and mostly mianmian and jin zixuan are just vaguely annoyed and put out about it

then lan wangji shows up with a broken leg and a burned sect and they are ready to murder some dudes

after years of breaking in and out of carp tower she and jin zixuan are old hats at this breaking and entering stuff and they manage to sneak into lan wangji’s guest quarters and tend to his wounds, ignoring all his silent glares and ranting furiously about how they’re going to murder wen chao by making him choke on his own dick (mianmian) and how they’re going to war with the wen sect even if he has to threaten his father with acknowledging all of his bastards as proper siblings in public to do it (jin zixuan)

lan wangji just says “mn” and makes various muted, distressed expressions, but mianmian thinks he’s touched.

“are your brother and uncle alright?” she asks, when she’s set his broken leg and forced pain medication down his throat.

“brother escaped with our sacred texts,” lan wangji says. “uncle is... unwell.”

mianmian knows lan wangji hates touch but the way he says it, with this horrible little frown, emoting more than she’s ever seen him, his barely suppressed anger and grief literally making his hands shake into fists, mianmian can’t help it, she hugs him. “we’ll make them pay,” she swears into his shoulder, ruining the lines of his robes with how she clutches at them. “i promise you.”

jin zixuan awkwardly pats lan wangji’s shoulder, which is a lot for him and mianmian spares a moment to be proud of his growth.

unfortunately, wen chao seems to delight in torturing lan wangji on his injured leg and lan wangji refuses to show weakness, which both impresses mianmian and pisses her the fuck off. she approaches wen qing (and her still gorgeous ears, sigh) and asks her to tend to lan wangji, since she’s like actually a doctor. wen qing does bc she’s beautiful, intelligent, and kind and mianmian spends most of that night sighing deeply as she relates this to a significantly drugged lan wangji

the cave of the xuanwu goes about the same as you’d expect. wei wuxian saving her from getting her face branded off is pretty rad of him, though he could’ve just like knocked the brand away instead of throwing himself in front of it but whatever, you do you boo. when lan wangji gets left behind the two of them don’t even have to wait for jiang cheng to grumble and ask for their help, they’re already on their way to carp tower for an army, thank you very much

when they rescue wei wuxian and lan wangji and lan wangji immediately turns to walk back to cloud recesses on a broken leg mianmian says, “fuck no, that’s not happening, you’re getting medical attention and then someone will fly you back home, okay, wtf wangji, sit down.”

and lan wangji is a stubborn bitch so obvs he’s like no but he’s also severely starved, dehydrated, and injured, so it’s not like he can just shake off mianmian holding him down and this goes on long enough for wei wuxian to wake up and see mianmian touching lan wangji, and something in his poor little brain just like breaks and he demands says, “lan zhan, come back to lotus pier with us.”

his argument, as he explains it, is that lotus pier is closer (it’s not; they’re just as close to carp tower as lotus pier) and that it’s closer to gusu for when lan wangji has to return home (it’s not; same deal) but then jiang cheng starts yelling, possibly in support possibly not mianmian’s not sure, and jin zixuan starts getting awkward, probably about the whole golden army behind him bc he’s a nerd and hates being overdressed at functions (this is basically the same thing), and mianmian looks at lan wangji and she sees--

something. she isn’t sure what exactly, but lan wangji looks at wei wuxian as he argues with his brother and he presses his lips into a thin line in the way that means he wants to smile and mianmian thinks, oh. maybe wei wuxian isn’t completely unrequited in his lan wangji obsession.

growing up in lanling, she knows how to use information to her advantage, so she immediately says, “young masters wei and jiang, what a great idea. lanling’s disciples would be pleased to accompany you and second young master lan to lotus pier to ensure everyone’s safe arrival.”

everyone splutters, indignant, confused, awkward (jiang cheng, wei wuxian, and jin zixuan, respectively) but lan wangji narrows his eyes at mianmian and doesn’t try to convince her to let him walk to gusu again, so she counts it as a win.

sect leader jiang and his wife seem surprised and annoyed, respectively, to be taking in so many guests, but sect leader jiang merely smiles pleasantly and directs them to some guest quarters and mianmian and wei wuxian ask, simultaneously, for doctors to tend to lan wangji and wei wuxian makes a face at her and mianmian sighs to herself that she really is too gay to be in the middle of his thing with lan wangji.

turns out, walking a lot and fighting a cannibalistic turtle on a broken leg doesn’t do wonders for healing. lan wangji is also the worst patient ever, he keeps trying to sneak out and get up even though word came from his brother that he’s safe and alright and that cloud recesses is starting to rebuild after qinghe nie and lanling jin came to its aid and pushed out the wen

but with the combined efforts of mianmian, jin zixuan, and wei wuxian (and even jiang yanli at one point, bc who could say no to her soup??) they manage to get lan wangji to just rest for a fucking second, really which results in the jin disciples and lan wangji staying in lotus pier for longer than anyone could’ve expected

mianmian spends most of her time (when she isn’t forcing lan wangji to just fucking stay in bed) working with the jiang disciples, practicing archery, sword forms, and mooning after all the beautiful women here.

(”lan wangji, i know she’s scary, but have you seen madam yu? she could whip me with zidian and i’d thank her” “luo-guniang, please don’t ask madam yu to whip you” OR “lan wangji, i’m almost positive madam yu’s maids are a thing, do you think they’d let me join them just like once” “luo-guniang, could you please pass me my sword?” “why” “i’d like to put myself out of this misery” OR “she made me soup. lan wangji. lan wangji, i know you’re not sleeping, wake up, you have to listen to me, this soup”)

they end up staying so long that when wang lingjiao shows up threatening a child about a kite while sect leader jiang is away, she has a lot more to deal with than madam yu. since none of this had been a “sanctioned visit” no one actually knew that there was nearly an entire troop of jin disciples staying at lotus pier, so when the wens attack they are sorely unprepared for what they’re going to face.

(and ofc lan wangji breaks out of bed heroically and keeps madam yu from whipping wei wuxian, which means they aren’t down one of their most powerful fighters and mianmian has to suffer through the moon eyes they’re making at one another in the middle of a battle no less, she knew wei wuxian had no shame but she’d been hoping lan wangji would have some)

after the wen attack (and defeat) on lotus pier and the jin’s inarguable part in it, the war starts in earnest. lan wangji, after his long rest, heals fine and goes back to gusu to help rebuild his sect and plan for war, and mianmian and jin zixuan return to carp tower to plan as well, ignoring jin guangshan and focusing instead on his general to ensure lanling supplies necessary aid in the war effort

and war is always shitty, of course, and mianmian hates watching her sect family die on the battlefield, hates waiting for updates after every battle to see who’s still alive, hates the politics and jin guangshan trying to wheedle his way out of fighting when there’s fucking lives on the line

(and she could never know, how much easier it is, with yunmeng jiang at its full strength, with one of the brightest minds of their generation there to plot and help, with two of the best fighters not out searching for someone and instead focused on the front)

they reach nightless city after months of fighting and mianmian is ready to just fucking stab wen ruohan herself when they’re suddenly trapped. blocked in on all sides by puppets, their fallen soldiers rising again to turn on them, and it--it looks like they’re gonna die.

“this sucks,” she says to lan wangji, stifling her fear and choking it down. “i never even got to kiss a girl.”

lan wangji just says “mn.”

jin zixuan, beside them, says, “i was an idiot about jiang-guniang.”

lan wangji just says, “mn.”

then wei wuxian pulls out a fucking flute and a-- floating piece of metal? the army of puppets and corpses stops advancing, held in place by-- music, apparently? and wen ruohan emerges from his lair, black energy falling off him in waves, wei wuxian the idiot flies forward to meet him, gets wen ruohan’s hand around his throat for his trouble.

lan wangji yells, “wei ying!” and mianmian thinks, really not fair that lan wangji is gonna get a boyfriend before i get a girlfriend

and then wen ruohan gets stabbed by jin zixuan’s half brother of all people. wen ruohan, along with his puppets and wei wuxian, fall to the ground. lan wangji rushes forward to catch wei wuxian, mianmian runs after him, finds herself in company with jin zixuan and jiang cheng. when they get there, wei wuxian is barely conscious but he’s-- he’s fucking grinning up at lan wangji from the cradle of lan wangji’s arms

“lan zhan,” he says, “you caught me.”

lan wangji nods, says, “mn,” which is basically his equivalent of i’ll always catch you, wei ying.

“really,” mianmian says aloud, “it’s so unfair.”

the aftermath of the war is more annoying than the war itself, what with all the politics and in-fighting and jin guangshan trying to be the biggest dick there ever was. jin guangshan tries to name himself chief cultivator in wen ruohan’s stead but nie mingjue suggests jiang fengmian instead and the lan sect backs him. jin guangshan tries to demonize the wens but at wei wuxian’s loud rebuttal and sect leader jiang’s backing (which is then backed by both gusu lan and qinghe nie) he’s once again shouted down. and then jin guangshan tries to propose to jiang-guniang for his son and the poor woman just seems so awkward and her father doesn’t seem to know what to say and--

mianmian elbows jin zixuan whose eyes widen ridiculously but, after another, harder hit, he suddenly stands. all eyes go to him, which mianmian knows he hates, but he bows to his father, then jiang yanli, and says, “jiang-guniang, forgive my father’s impertinence. this is not the time or place to be making such an offer, but he--” jin zixuan winces visibly. “--he knows of my feelings and wishes to make his foolish son happy. please, do not feel the need to respond.”

then he promptly sits down, flushing down to his neck, and mianmian shares a disbelieving glance with lan wangji from across the horrible nightless city palace room.

she’d really only meant for him to suggest jiang yanli answer privately, at a later time, but wow, jin zixuan really went for it. also no way jin guangshan knows his son has fallen in love with jiang yanli, so nice save face there. maybe he has been paying attention in all of their etiquette and political espionage classes.

jiang yanli flushes way prettier than jin zixuan and nods politely, stands and bows and thanks the jin clan for being considerate in this time of turmoil, perhaps they can discuss this matter at a later date (jin zixuan looks like he nearly faints at this, and mianmian feels vindicated in all her forlorn ranting. overreacting her ass)

when everything has been settled, wen qing has been appointed the new sect leader of qishan wen with promises to return land to those who lost it and pay reparations to the hurt civilians, as well as have the yin iron destroyed for good. during the final ceremony where all the sects have tea and pledge to be loyal to one another (until the next great war, of course) mianmian leans close to lan wangji and sighs, “her ears look even lovelier with her hair tied back by her new sect leader hairpiece.”

lan wangji says “mn” because he’s a cut sleeve in love with wei wuxian and has nothing even closely resembling taste.

mianmian, on her own, decides to make them both happy. before the jin clan departs from nightless city, she goes up to wei wuxian and asks for a moment of his time. wei wuxian seems confused but follows and, once they’re alone, he says, “mianmian, are you about to get me into bed, because i must tell you that i am a respectable young cultivator and you’ll need to marry me before--”

mianmian gives him her best unimpressed look (she’s had much practice with it, thank you jin zixuan) and cuts him off with, “i like women.”

wei wuxian’s eyes go wide. “but you and lan zhan--”

she cuts him off again before he can say something so stupid she has to stop talking to him to refrain from breaking all laws of propriety. “look,” she says, “you’re friends with wen qing. now that she’s sect leader, your brother can’t go after her. i, on the other hand, very much can. if you promise to figure out a way for me and her to get close, i’ll tell you a secret you’ll like very much.”

wei wuxian seems hesitant for all of half a second before he breaks. “tell me.”

“do you promise?”

wei wuxian raises three fingers. “promise.”

“on your sister’s life?”

begrudgingly, wei wuxian nods.

“on her soup?”

“just get on with it!”

mianmian smirks, pushes onto her tiptoes, and whispers the secret into wei wuxian’s ear. with that, she returns to the pavilion where all the sects mingle as they wait to depart, wei wuxian trailing behind her in a daze, his mouth hanging open.

lan wangji, who had been watching since mianmian asked wei wuxian for a moment to talk, frowns nearly imperceptibly. mianmian grins at him and his frown grows.

ah, whatever. she walks over to him, unbothered by the quickly growing alarm in his eyes. once next to him, she turns around to see wei wuxian staring unabashedly. her smile only widens.

“you’re going to thank me for this,” she says.

wei wuxian shakes himself, his eyes focusing, and immediately starts walking towards them.

lan wangji, voice flat but wavering, asks, “luo-guniang, what did you do?”

mianmian laughs, says, “i get to give a speech at your wedding,” and walks away just as wei wuxian reaches them.

(she does, actually, give a speech at their wedding. she may or may not be drunk during it, jin zixuan gets embarrassed for her, and she starts tearing up and has to hide it in the shoulder of her wife’s lovely well-tailored robes. it’s alright, though, wen qing doesn’t mind)

EDIT: now on AO3 with a real fic version from lwj’s pov!

3K notes · View notes