#he has consequences for his behavior! they know hes an ass and they lean into it. and thats better than nothing to me | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

whetstonefires · 1 month

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I think a part of the reason I feel so connected to JGY and XY is that I, too, think everyone is lying about what a good person they are. Sure, there may be a few genuinely good people, but those are in the minority and never claim the title.

I don't know about never; some people are pretty straightforward.

And in some ways the whole point of the concept of 'a good person' is that the feeling of losing the right to consider yourself one can impose instinctive recoil from doing wrong, in situations where you don't have the leisure of working your way through an ethics diagram and choosing the logically moral path before reacting to a situation. It has practical utility.

But that system can backfire pretty horribly too, in a lot of ways. It can be hijacked by definitions of 'good' that actually make you recoil from ethical acts because they're deviant. It can lead to disappearing up your own ass lmao.

And definitely the threshold for 'talking about how you're a good person' enough that it makes you suspect as either a) a liar or b) someone who values that self-image over objective reality and other people's wellbeing is. Not very high.

Jin Guangyao, ironically, is one of those people who's so performatively A Good Person in his public life that in retrospect it looks like a red flag. Which knowing this about himself in an ongoing fashion ofc just reinforces his own cynicism about everyone else lmao.

Even Lan Xichen, who I think he may see as a genuinely good person, he also sees as an easy mark who will reliably choose what is comfortable over what is 'right,' if you just structure the scenario to make that an easy choice that's easy for him to justify.

Xue Yang's bitterness is in many ways more exciting than Jin Guangyao's because he has a way more unusual relationship to reality, but it does share a lot of notes.

The role of deception in his psychology fascinates me because as far as I can tell he's as instinctively straightforward a person as Lan Wangji, albeit along quite different lines involving a total lack of impulse control, but has adopted 'deceit' as a weapon against the wicked world in the same way he has adopted 'murder.'

But when he feels someone is not merely lying but papering over bad behavior with principles they are not living up to he is livid.

People claiming to be better than him because they're 'good' when 'good' is a construct of privilege, is the underlying idea he's not equipped to articulate. Except he takes that and applies it to 'hitting me to interrupt my random murder of some guy who happened to be within arm's reach when I wanted to hurt someone.'

Which isn't like philosophically perfect, but the underlying problem he's actually reacting to is that he understands the social contract as a lie that has never protected him but seeks to control him, while protecting rich men it has no power to control.

Which it is fair to be mad about, but then his feeling is that since that's the nature of the world and all people, he is entitled to amass for himself the power to inflict hurt without consequences as much as he possibly can, and to use it against the vulnerable for fun, and no one is entitled to interfere.

Which brings him to a place where he is violently angry at anyone talking about trying to treat other people well as a value, because either they're a hypocrite and a liar or they threaten his entire system of rationalization for why he can be The Worst and still In The Right.

'Everyone is equally bad, actually' is like, an understandable take for anyone who's had cause to become embittered. Everyone is free to make whatever philosophical peace they can with the world and by and large there's no ethical weight to any such opinion, in itself.

But it's an ideological crutch people tend to wind up leaning on very heavily when they can't or don't want to take responsibility for their own behavior.

Which is an approach that Xue Yang, Jin Guangyao, and Su She all share, and which not only is shitty of them, it...traps them in a wheel of doubling down on their own worst impulses because rather than going 'that was bad and I shouldn't do it again' they've repeatedly invested all this energy into making what they did actually the correct thing, according to their interpretation of the context. Which means they're more likely to do it again.

(I think this is how Jin Guangyao became a serial killer, for example. He followed a doing-a-murder-impulse and then internally doubled down on how he had nothing to be ashamed of, so he was more likely to do it again, every time.

Wei Wuxian's strain of self-righteousness about his revenge was less...thorough than Jin Guangyao's, because he had the benefit of going after people on the opposite side of a war from him while Meng Yao's first known murder plot was against a shitty boss. But it probably didn't help him not try to solve army-shaped problems with mass murder, even after that stopped being allowed.)

If any of them had just like, zero moral sensibilities they would have created very different problems, and very possibly fewer of them. It's making a central goal of your operations 'self-vindication in your own internal narrative, created retroactively via reframing' rather than 'figuring out what I think I should do and trying to do that' that traps them in the self-reinforcing murder pissbaby vortex.

So if you look at it one way, these three villains are themselves perfect examples of how pursuit of the 'feeling of being good' (or at least 'not the bad guy') can make you worse.

Notably Wei Wuxian was also extremely sensitive to hypocrisy in his youth; it was the only part of Madam Yu's behavior he was ever shown objecting to. But he's sufficiently mellow and cynical from regret and burnout by the 'present' timespan after his resurrection to just get disgusted and alienated about it, rather than outraged.

He wasn't even all that mad at Xue Yang, though honestly that may be partly because he stopped entirely characterizing him as a person at some point during their interaction. Like, there's no point being angry at someone whose moral sensibilities operate exclusively on the plane of 'is this unfair to me' for manipulating and destroying people who were good to him, and then getting obsessed with his own self-pity about it. This is not a person who understands how not to be, metaphorically speaking, a cannibal.

And Wei Wuxian did know better and still got roughly the same result, so what business does he have getting angry?

Anyway yeah those two villains are both delightfully relatable if you sit down and put their perspectives together; they are clearly operating with the same basic suite of human needs and emotions as everybody else, without that being in itself particularly exculpatory, which is honestly refreshing. They've just got the most fantastically toxic interpersonal habits that knowing them counts as some level of Suffering A Curse.

Jin Guangyao and Xue Yang do both stand as scathing rebukes of the society that created them. But within the narrative, wherein they're people, the fact is that each of them had agency and one of the things they chose to do with it was develop rationales for why they were the most special little guy and everything was someone else's fault.

And their moral nihilisms, while also grounded in serious trauma, ping me as emotional masturbation of this variety.

#ask #hoc est meum #Anonymous #rambling about ethics and villains lol #this isn't an organized essay but it's the best i'm going to manage #wei wuxian #xue yang #jin guangyao #meta #mdzs #this is why wwx is not that invested in how the underlying machinations made his bad choices 'not his fault' btw #spending too much time chewing your own vomit narrows your view until you can only be selfish #jiang cheng is also somewhat trapped in the pissbaby vortex #but he did get deliberately stuck there by people who loved him (his mom and wwx mostly)#and he has much higher standards than the villains about who he takes it out on and how #and there is a non-zero chance he will claw his way out post-canon #which none of those three was ever going to do no matter how much time and paradigm shifting information you gave them #so i cut him more slack

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megistusdiary · 2 years

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Ayato seems so calm and collected in public, holding back whatever irritation he feels when you beg him for more affection in public. He is an important man and doesnt want other people in on his business. However once you start flirting with other men in hopes to rile him up a little he’ll rush you back to the estate and teach you the consequences of disobeying a commissioner. You wanted him to be more possessive so here you are!

ANYWAYS UH BRAT TAMER AYATO WHO MARKS YOU UP TO THE POINT THAT you’re EMBARRASSED TO GO OUT IN PUBLIC??? Yes please

THIS CONCEPT?? 🧎🏼‍♀️ 🧎🏼‍♀️😩 i love this so very much. also ayato has been on my mind lately fr fr. nonnie, you're a genius 🤌

i hope this does the concept justice ;w;

warnings: brat-tamer!ayato and sub!fem anatomy/pronouns reader

brat-taming, marking, manhandling, spanking, asphyxiation, dacryphilia, bondage, degradation, reader calls him 'sir.'

"ayato, m'sorry! i didn't mean it!" your eyes were glassy with tears as you stared up at ayato. he loomed over you, looking down with a deceptively neutral expression.

his gloved hand reached down for your face, gripping your jaw and pulling you towards him. he tilted your chin up, forcing your gaze to meet his.

"if you're looking for mercy, perhaps you should ask those other men you threw yourself at." he hissed, feeling your cheeks radiate warmth.

"i just wanted you to pay attention to- mmff!" ayato pressed your cheeks together, puffing your lips out and effectively silencing you.

"you were that desperate for attention? you think it's acceptable to flirt with my business partners, hm?" he paused, taking a moment to think. you watched his tongue dart out to wet his lips before they twisted into a smirk that made your eyes widen. "or, maybe, this is exactly what you wanted." the way your thighs rubbed together told him all he needed to know.

ayato laughed, running a hand through his hair and releasing your cheeks. your head fell forward at the loss of his grip, face feeling numb.

"you want to know what happens when you misbehave? fine, i'm more than delighted to demonstrate." he leaned over you, manhandling you to his liking. the rope binding on your hands made it easier as you simply turned whichever way he wished.

you shivered as he positioned you on your hands and knees, arching your back for him. you felt him lift your skirt up, cold air hitting your bare cunt. you faintly remember hearing him mention something about counting, thinking nothing of it.

until his bare hand came down hard on your ass. you lurched forwards, struggling to support your body.

"count." he reminded you.

"one!" you cried out, gasping when he hit you again rapidly.

"one what?"

"sir!" you bit your lip, feeling his hand skim over your heated skin. he spanked you again, taking pleasure in your shaky moans and gasps. he could hear you mumbling 'sir' and 'sorry' mixed in with counts for each hit.

he did so wish to see your face, though. seeing your pretty eyes fill with tears, lips quivering as you stare up at him.

growing bored of this position, he moved you again as he pleased. this time, you were sitting on his lap, pussy hovering over his dress pants. you looked up at him nervously as he leaned down, pressing you close to his chest as he began sucking marks up and down your neck.

you whined, writhing against him and trying to escape the painful nipping sensations. "hold still." he warned you, sucking another mark into the junction of your neck and shoulder.

"but, i- these can't be hidden- it's too warm for high collars, aya- sir." you trembled in his hold as he scoffed.

"that's your problem. you should've reconsidered your insolent behavior at today's meeting." he moved back, hearing your exhale of relief. it was replaced with a breathless gasp as his hand wrapped around your throat.

his other hand went down to your cunt, laying fingers against your entrance. he sneered as he squeezed the sides of your throat, feeling you clench against his fingers. "you're so desperate." you closed your eyes in shame, mouth falling open as he cut off your air carefully.

you felt his fingers tease your entrance, collecting the slick from your hole. he dipped the tips in continuously as you shivered. you struggled to not press down on them.

you suddenly felt ayato push you back onto the bed, falling limply like a doll with your hands tied behind your back. "you must be completely foolish to think i would touch you seeing how you conducted yourself this afternoon. if i were you, i would get to making it up. right now."

#genshin impact x reader #genshin x reader #genshin impact smut #genshin smut #genshin impact #genshin impact x reader smut #genshin ayato #ayato x you #ayato x reader #ayato smut #ayato #💌─𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘴 𝘩𝘢𝘴 𝘮𝘢𝘪𝘭! ༊*·˚#✎─𝘥𝘪𝘢𝘳𝘺 𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴 ❛ ༉‧₊˚

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girlwithwolftatoo · 2 years

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hey! can you please make a Doctor Harrow x reader, where reader misbehaves so he puts her on the rails if you know what I mean-

Of course I do, dear anon... of course I do...

Doctor Harrow + teaching reader some manners:

*Your behavior from the last days has been the worst. Guards and nurses had complaint about you being rude, skipping the rules and even involving into fights with them and other patients. When this reaches Harrow's ears, he summons you for an emergency session.

*You keep acting like a brat, not paying attention on purpose and toying with the things on the doctor's desk. Arthur's patience is big, but you can notice a hint of exasperation in his voice when he says "You're not listening, are you, (Y/N)?" You stare at him and stick your tongue out before minding your own business. The doctor sighs and takes off his glasses.

*At first you think he's joking when he asks you to remove your pants, but since you don't obey, Harrow leaves his seat and grabs you by an arm. "Hey! What the hell?" you shut before being pinned against the wall with a strenght you never thought possible from him. The doctor twitches your arm to your back to keep you in place as his other hand pulls your pants down. The most worrying thing of this is listening to his still calmed voice whispering "I asked you politely to do this by yourself and you refused... this is just the consequence of your misbehavior, (Y/N)"

*Once he's done, he almost drags you to his brand new couch for the therapy sessions, sits on it and maneuvers you so you end laying down on his lap. You can feel his hand traveling up and down your naked legs. "Discipline doesn't mean punishment" he speaks, gently pressing his hand to your butt "Don't take this personal, we are just doing some... corrective coersitive techniques"

*Before you can ask what's going on, the first slap hits your rear so hard you screech and give a small jump. Your first thought is spitting curses to him, but Harrow doesn't seem bothered by your words. And when the pain begins to fade away... there's another slap.

*Harrow said this wasn't a punishment, but the spanking hurts like hell, like he knows how, where and when to strike to bring you to the maximum level of discomfort. You struggle to escape and shut at him menaces and more dirty words, but his hand claws your cheeks, squeezing them so hard it's almost painful, and forces you to lean your neck to see you straight to the eye. "It seems you're in a rage crisis... you need to calm down, (Y/N), to release those negative feelings, I will help you with that".

*The next thing you know is his hand leaves your face but goes to your throat with a strong grip that makes you feel dizzy after some seconds. You open your mouth and gasp while his other hand strikes your butt, that's already pink for all the spanking. "We are going to practice some... quietness" Harrow says "Everytime you use your words to say something mean or hurtful, you'll get some... time out without the chance to speak"

*Harrow releases your throat, and while you cough and pant, he undoes his belt (you can feel his hand next to your side). The soft material of the belt caresses your thighs at the moves of Arthur's hand, and when he lifts it to keep with the spanking, you forget for a moment about his warning and shut a very loud "It hurts, you bastard-!" before he holds your throat once again.

*The next part of doctor Harrow's "treatment" consists in keep with the spakning using his belt while you apologize at every strike, following his instructions. "I'm sorry for -OUCH- fighting with my pals..." "Are you going to do that again?" "No, I won't" "You promise?" "I pro-AGH -promise!" "Repeat after me, (Y/N), I won't fight with my pals again" he commands you as he shoves two fingers in your mouth, playing with your tongue so when you speak it goes like a babbling. "Sorry, (Y/N), I couldn't hear you" and you receive a new hit on your poor and swollen ass.

*When Harrow feels satisfied by your "progress", he drops the belt and rubs your butt. "I know you feel hurt, let's soothe this together, are you agree?" His fingers run across the gap between your buttocks, looking for what can be found at the end of it. A fingertip presses softly on the fabric, right on your pussy entrance. "Am I wrong or you're a little aroused, (Y/N)?" Since you don't answer immediately, he gives a little slap right on your cunt "What did we just learn today?" "Sorry, doctor... Yes, I am"

*Harrow doesn't hesitate and reaches for your sensitive areas, making you questions to know the reason behind your physical reaction. "Were you spanked at childhood? Who did it? How was your relationship with that person? You know, some special apetites come from unconscious needs, goals we cannot fulfill in certain moments of our life... Tell me, (Y/N), what do you need now? Whom you want to please?"

*The fact Harrow does everything acting so calmed and professional makes you squirm like anything before. You willingly spread your legs to give him free access and you dig your nails on the couch while he fingers you, speaking reassuring words about how proud is he for your good behavior and how he'll reward you for every day you act as a "good girl" and do as you're told.

(Sorry if this is long but oh dear, had too much fun writing this)

#moon knight #moon knight headcanon #moon knight series #arthur harrow #arthur harrow x reader #dr harrow #ethan hawke #arthur harrow headcanon #marvel series

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jjungkooksthighs · 30 days

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He doesn’t need to ask her if she likes what she sees. He has proof enough of that with each stuttered breath she takes. With each second she ogles his cock like it were some kind of delicacy. Even the way her lips part is telling of her desire as her fingers twitch on his thighs.

With one word, he knows she would take him between those pouty lips of hers without question. He doesn’t give it, however. No, she would be better served to marinate in her need. To let it warm and spread throughout her entire being until she could no longer bear it. She’d made him suffer the agony of her absence in the forest and the only way she would truly understand how that had felt was this.

This is what she deserved for denying him. For fucking rejecting him.

And as beautiful as she looked on her knees for him, he had to do this.

“If you wanted to please me,” his lip curls under to reveal glistening teeth as he brings his mouth ever closer to hers, “you would have given yourself to me well before now. You would have obeyed me well before now.” He tips his chin down, his sight fixing on her tits that rise and fall quickly beneath his aching member, “Your words do not align with your actions. I have no interest in listening to words that slip freer than water down those pretty tits of yours.”

She can't help but fall back on her ass when he leans forward, too intimidated by his stature and demeanor to really look into his eyes. He doesn't allow that. In one swift motion, she's ushered forward by the grip on her jaw, a silent growl from him all the message she needs from him for her to speak the fuck up. "B-but-" she tries, but he growls louder at that. "You're not allowed that fucking word, slut." He throws, tilting her chin up so she's forced to keep her eyes on him. "Try again." She nods her head, timid and hesitant. "Y-yes, sir.." It's all she can get out. She has no other response to his words, for there is no explanation for her recent behavior. He was right. She was a fucking brat. A disobedient mate, although she'd promised him her submission and obedience long before. Every single time she'd fucked up, she begged for forgiveness, promising that she would never be disobedient again. That she'd be good. And every single time, he'd show her mercy, trusting her blindly without asking for proof. She'd dragged this on for far too long. She took advantage of his leniency until he fucking run out of it all. Now, she's simply going to have to face the consequences. She feels like she's learned her lesson. However, deep down, a small part of her knows that only if she goes through with her punishment would she truly feel like she's earned his forgiveness, if he's willing to give it to her any time soon, that is. The thought sends her mind spiraling. If? She can't have that. She can't take that! She wastes no more time in trying to speak, the words tumbling out of her mouth faster than ever. "I.. I was being a.. a bad girl, sir. I wasn't being good for you although I promised you that." She admits with a downtrodden look. However, it doesn't seem to have the calming effect it should. It only seemed to aggravate him more, her acceptance of what she'd done, what she'd put him through making his wolf thrust forward the enraging picture of her splayed on her back, hands buried in her pussy on the forest floor, her act of disobedience on display for everyone to see. She sees the image as well. Fuck... she didn't want him to think of- Before she can even start another useless apology, a dark chuckle leaves him, the sound cold in contrast to the heat that seems to radiate off of him as he rattles her head side to side before speaking.

“You do not know what it is to be good after how much I have defiled you, female.” His hand twists around his base, his irises hailing over in the iciness of his wolf as he jabs, “You’ve forgotten how to be because the innocent girl you once were has been corrupted by delicious sin.” He fingers grip his length tighter as he tugs on it only to grunt, “You have tasted how delicious my love and lust for you are, and now that you have, you will do anything to get my attention so that I’ll give more of them to you.” He curls his fingers around so that they make almost make a ring around his cock as the digits he has around her jaw press in so much that it begins to ache. “Isn’t that right, female?”

She can only paw at his ankles in his response, a pitiful whine releasing itself from her throat.

He shows his teeth in threat, “I do not believe I gave you permission to keep that mouth of yours shut. I like it open.” He confesses, his hand sliding slow down his cock.

The suggestion is very heavy in its implications, and she can’t help herself when she imagines the impressive weight and girth of him when she has him between her lips.

The first time she’d ever taken him into her mouth, she hadn’t any clue how to please him. But he hadn’t cared. No, instead, he’d welcomed and even relished in her ignorance. He’d taken pride in being the first- and being her only.

She remembered well how he had given her instructions, step-by-step, how to suck a male’s cock while he’d groaned and moaned from how eager she’d been to satisfy him.

Even when that massive member had been inches from her face, she had been steadfast in her desire to satisfy him. Even when her jaw had locked into place and she couldn’t move it from how big he’d been as he pushed past her lips, she had only wanted to pleasure him. To watch his expressions shift and hear his beautiful, arousing sounds of satisfaction. All because of her.

Knowing she had been the one to make this male before her-the strongest, most able and apt alpha in dominion over the entire pack- made her hot and heady.

It made power rush to her head and need swell in her loins.

Perhaps that’s how she manages to find some of her vocals and use them.

“Yes, alpha,” she nudges her nose along the inside of his knee, “you’re right. You’re always right. I just can’t help it anymore.” She presses her lips to the place she’d just been rubbing at, “I can’t stop wanting you. However and whenever.”

Her admission has him hastening his strokes along his length, his eyes rolling back when she turns her head so she can kiss along the innermost corner of his knee.

He had once told her, when his mouth had been attached to her sex, that everything felt better with tongue. So, she does.

It’s a timid brush of the pink muscle over his flesh, but the moment it touches him, the fingers he has grasping her jaw tighten. The sensation goes straight to his cock, the picture of her on her knees between his legs too licentious of a sight.

He curses. “Fuck. You are such a devilish little temptress. You know exactly what you’re doing.” When his irises dig into hers, she’s pricked by those silver depths. “But you forget one very important thing. I didn’t tell you that you were allowed to lick me, now did I?”

#alpha jungkook asks

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daryldixonsdoormat · 2 years

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Wade walker usually didn’t get involved with Squares or Women of any kind. Pepper and the rest of the group (apart from hatchet face) was completely convinced that Squares was Crybaby’s type. Of course you knew who Crybaby Walker was, he was the talk amongst the drapes and sang at jamborees. You are no little miss priss, you were a drape and surprisingly you didn��t cause a ruckus. You got in minor trouble every other day to embrace who you really are, but never more than slashing a squares tires. Allison was a acquaintance, she was a magnificent friend in middle school before money and where your from really mattered. She let go after freshman year, it was a real nasty argument, not long after the yelling her grandmother kicked you out. Insulting you’re clothing, music, the way you talk even chalking it all up to ‘hoodlum’ behavior. Alison didn’t scold or confront her grandmother for disrespecting your way of living. She shrugged it off and walked into her room without a word of goodbye.

It’s yearly vaccines, everyone has to yet shots for the school year and I’m still waiting in line. Alison is supposed to go next after the girl in the chair stops crying and gets off the stool. Pettiness is the only answer here of course, nurses can’t stop me from getting my shots even if I cut Alison in the Squares line. As she walks up to get on the stool I take a long stride in-front of her so quickly her hair moves from the air. I peel of my leather jacket and sit onto the stool while the nurse/doctor preps the needle. I smile at Alison who is struggling to be lady like and not glare. I stick my right hand up to shield the doctors view and I flip her off on the other side of my hand. She gasps rather dramatically and hits her boyfriends chest to look at my finger. I put my finger down before he could see not wanting to cause too big of a scene infront of so many. Squares have no problem causing a scene because they know there will be no consequences, a bunch of them are pushing Crybaby to the front of the drape line. He flings off his leather jacket partially it hanging off his elbows. He looks pissed, maybe it’s because of the shots or the rich kids seeming to think they can shove people around. Literally. They rub the alcohol pads on our arms and I look away trying to find something to distract me from the long ass needle Crybaby Walker was definitely a sight for sore eyes. A perfect distraction, he wasn’t supposed to turn towards me and catch me staring. I turn my head quickly closing my eyes, only to turn back seconds later to see him a tear rolling down his cheek. Is that way they call him Crybaby or is it something else.

We are dismissed as soon as we get the vaccine or to wherever we damn well please. Coincidentally I don’t have any where to go, no family, no friends I could trust to house me. Most nights are spent outside under the school bleachers or where all the jamborees are. No point of walking to a unknown destination when I could just hitch a ride off someone. It’s kinda ironic that Crybaby and his crew/family? Is leaning against a black car waiting for something to happen. I walk across the street and stop after the traffic lady persists I look both ways. I make a beeline to the group who have already took notice to my intentions of a conversation. “Hi Pepper. Everyone else” I’ve talked to Pepper a few times nothing spectacular though. Pepper nods and the rest of the group share snarky or relaxed looks when addressed. Crybaby lights a match from the inside of his mouth just to put it out on his tongue. Why? No idea but I would be lying if I said it didn’t make me more fond of him. “Crybaby, you think I could hitch a ride?” I say standing steady direct eye contact is always the way to ask for a ride. “Sure I could give a pretty little thing like you a lift” he says circling me before leaving back on his car. All is set there is a small period of silence before I get knocked into from the side by the one and only Alison. She swear aye back and forth on her heals smiling so bright it could blind someone. “Hi” sounds like she nearly yelled it at him the group looks at her with mischief, they want to make her a drape. “ You wanna tag along with us to the jamboree . I’ll be singing tonight.” he looks back over to me and asks if I would be interested as well. Alison boyfriends clasps onto mine and her shoulders, wanting to save two girls that shouldn’t be associating with drapes. He bling or either lost his mind, this guy remembers the few times I dressed up pretty to try and get on Alison’s grandmothers side. “Get your filthy hands off of me Bladwin. I ain’t no square, your girlfriend is” eyes are shifting all over the place going from Me to Alison back to Baldwin and then her grandmother. And a few rude comments and full fledged glares the squares leave and so do we.

AN: I’m making a part two definitely maybe a part three and it’s gonna be steamy (the make out scene).

#crybaby walker x y/n #crybaby walker x you #wade walker x you #wade walker x y/n #wade walker x reader #crybaby x reader #CRYBABY IS SO CUTE

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bengiyo · 1 year

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HIStory5: Love in the Future Ep 3 Stray Thoughts

Last week we once again succumbed to side couple supremacy with Lin Wynn and Liang Vincent. Lin Wynn saved Bo-wei from jumping to his death, but commentary from the summoner implies that Bo-wei would have gone home. I'm absolutely obsessed with Tony and want to study him. Bo-wei is turning the warehouse into a domicile, and we learned a little bit more about how much of sad Hai Yi is. We ended on Bo-wei running into the rain to get electrocuted.

I feel like I say this every week, but why are the Taiwan actors always the prettiest.

Hai Yi just pulled what looked like a practiced restraint maneuver on Bo-wei.

Curious if there will be any supernatural consequences for revealing that he's a time traveler.

Interesting: Hai Yi is afraid of the dark.

Oh my. Looks like Once Again isn't alone now in playing with time travel, romance, and age.

Tony's current suit is sending me into orbit!!!

Would you look at that Wynn Lin stood up for himself and we got to hear our favorite simp's internal cheering.

I like the way everyone says "Dai Johnny." Wynn Lin is probably my favorite character. I like how he keeps trying to do nice things for Bo-wei.

This is a new evolution of the pratfall kiss: Let me lean in too close to brush his hair, and then fall onto his mouth when he wakes up suddenly and instinctively pushes my hand away.

This man is going to have a heart attack from all the excitement.

I'm kind of enjoying this inversion of fake dating. Bonding over your failed attempts to seduce a woman is classic mlm behavior.

Si-Chi knows how to handle swagless men who won't back off.

Lin Wynn's confusion is understandable. He accidentally crossed a boundary with his superior and doesn't know where he stands.

Damn, Bo-wei is getting his ass beat!

I was hoping Hai Yi might show up as Bo-wei's hero instead. Any time people start talking about being someone's hero, I am always taken back to my Make It Right era.

The instinctive intimacy between Lin Wynn and Liang Vincent is making me feral. However, this doesn't seem to be much of a massage?

I like that no one interrupted that moment of intimacy.

Meanwhile, back at the warehouse, Dai Johnny begins to recover from his injuries. Hopefully we get some wound tending.

At least Hai Yi appreciates the physical danger he inflicted upon Bo-wei.

Si-Chi definitely trying to get with Vincent. I don't know about this, and I'm glad Bo-wei happened by.

Liang is rather impressive if he skipped school and is now upper management of this department store.

I also want to study Hai Yi. Clearly he's self-sufficient, so is he pretending he's not to entertain Bo-wei?

Oh no, it's my greatest fear: Bo-wei has actually taken over someone else's life, and now I have to think about what happened to Johnny.

#history5: love in the future #history 5: love in the future #taiwanese bl #bl series #Ben watches

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bitacrytic · 2 years

Text

blue is not your color (2)

Read Part One Here

“Are you saying that I’ve hurt you?”

♧♧♧

It wasn’t physical pain.

It wasn’t even the powerlessness from being tied up, unable to move or breathe through the cloth over his head.

It was definitely not the gaps in his evening, where he remembered standing by the bar, then the bathroom, and then the hotel room. It wasn’t that.

It was the freedom, the utter floatiness of sitting on the bathroom pavement, looking up at Kinn and just knowing that he could say anything he wanted. He could do anything. And he’d have no consequences.

When he reached out and grabbed Kinn. When he kissed him, when he allowed Kinn to touch him in a way no man ever had, Porsche felt untethered to this world, flying over mortal worries, regardless of consequence.

That was where the hurt was.

He had thought he was free just because he was with Kinn. He’d thought that he could do or say whatever he wanted.

But in the morning, his memories had come crashing.

And, like always, the real Kinn was right back in place.

♧♧♧

“Your life is mine.”

♧♧♧

It was a far cry from his whispers of supplication, just a day ago.

“Porsche,” he’d said like his life depended on it. “Please,” he’d begged, writhing behind Porsche, desperate to finish, desperate enough to make the friction worth it. Because Porsche had no idea what came over him. A drugged out state was no excuse for his behavior.

Wanting Kinn like he’d wanted him wasn’t just because of the drug. Kinn’s sexual distress had been thrilling. Teasing him, goading him into action had felt more intoxicating than anything that had been in Porsche’s system.

“Can I…” Kinn had asked, sweaty and blissed out, hands wrapped around Porsche’s waist like he was scared Porsche had somewhere else to be. “Uhn,” Kinn groaned, slipping free. “I want, Porsche…”

At first, he had no idea what Kinn was asking for. Not that he could give himself much credit, in that moment. Not much mattered, but the fact that Porsche was keyed up to ten, with his ass leaking of Kinn’s cum, unable to move from the actual pain and the fatigue that was starting to set in, in his legs.

“What do you want?” Porsche asked, turning around to sit. It hurt to sit. It was even a little slippery. But anything was better than standing up on jelly legs, with a hard dick.

As Kinn fell to his knees before Porsche, eyes bright with adoration and something Porsche couldn’t quite put his finger on, it began to dawn on him, what Kinn was begging for.

“Please.”

And like a fool, Porsche had thought he had any say in what Kinn was allowed to do with his body.

♧♧♧

“I’m replacing you.”

♧♧♧

Porsche closed the door and leaned on it, hands quivering at his sides as he tried not to scream, or he’d wake Pete.

“I’m replacing you.”

What more could Porsche expect from a mafia boss?

Maybe that night on the pier, that stupid kiss, that short useless speech about the pressures of living this life, maybe all of that was just talk. He wouldn’t put it passed Kinn to-

Pete’s side lamp came out, stunning Porsche into raising his elbow to block the light.

“You’re back.”

“Didn’t mean to wake you.”

As he moved in, kicking off his shoes, Pete gasped in bed, pointing at the ground.

“What’s that?” Pete asked.

When Porsche looked down, it was nothing but an unassuming, single, blue petal.

“I don’t know,” Porsche said, shrugging off his shirt.

“Oh my god,” Pete rushed to Porsche, turning him around by the shoulders, worry and fear in his eyes. “What happened? How long has it been coming?”

Porsche frowned, then he looked between Pete and the petal, before he blinked into comprehension.

“It’s not mine,” he shook Pete off. “I swear. The first time I saw it, I checked myself for symptoms. I’m fine.”

He put a finger down his throat, coughed and jumped up and down to show that he really was fine.

“The first time? When did you start seeing it?”

Porsche took off his pants.

He’d been seeing blue petals around him ever since he woke up in the hotel room. It wasn’t his. It wasn’t his problem.

“If the flower has been following you everywhere, then someone around you is in love with you.”

“Not my problem.”

Pete frowned at him.

“Everyone in this compound is either a member of the main family or an employee of the main family. Considering Khun Kinn, you better hope the person never confesses their feelings for you.”

Porsche stopped on his way to the bathroom. Slowly, he turned back to his roommate, who sat on his own bed, looking incredibly worried.

“What does that mean?”

Pete sighed, looking sideways as he pursed his lips.

“Look, I don’t know what’s going on between you and Khun Kinn-”

“Nothing! Nothing’s going on between Khun Kinn and I.”

“Whatever it is,” Pete said, speaking over him. “No one wants to get in the middle of it. If I was choking up blue petals because of you-”

“I mean it, Pete.”

“You were out of it, so you probably don’t remember.”

“Remember what?” Porsche asked, sitting on his bed, facing Pete.

“He wouldn’t let anyone else touch you. Even after you threw up on him.”

“I what?”

“He asked us all to get the fuck out. He was frantic and scared and…” Pete hesitated. “...and possessive.”

“Over me?”

“I know you’re a private person and you don’t like to share your private life.” Pete shrugged. “That’s fine. But if it were me and I was in love with you, I’d rather die than confess my feelings, because even though hanahaki hurts like hell,” Pete said, a hard look on his face. “Khun Kinn is incredibly unforgiving.”

Porsche spared the blue petal a long look. Not for the hundredth time in twenty-four hours, Porsche found himself regretting his decision to walk into the lion’s den, on his own two feet.

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vipier · 23 days

Text

TRISTAN KNOWS PERFECTLY WELL THE WAY IN WHICH MOST OF THE WORLD SEES HIM. after a certain age, when he began to realize how much harder he would have to work to be respected, that people were at best more likely to pity him for his circumstances than to consider him somebody with any kind of potential, he’d elected to lean into it. as a self fulfilling prophecy, such barbs could not continue to break skin, to cut as deep into an already paltry veneer of confidence. he knows plenty of others wouldn’t understand his tactics or motivations — and quite frankly, he does not believe for one moment that they need to. he looks after himself to alleviate the need for others to understand him. it also makes it far simpler to act on instinct, to do as he wishes when he wishes it, to give into impulses that others allow to rule them. to hell with the consequences, especially when he has something he is invested in protecting — not that anybody needs to be privy to that part of it all.

he’s managed to slip away from the nurse’s office, although he’s certain it won’t be long before somebody from the administration comes looking for him. not out of concern, of course, but rather, to admonish him, to make clear what kind of behavior is acceptable in this institution. what they say is that they don’t condone violence ; what they mean is that they don’t condone the foster kid taking swings at the rich kid, no matter what kind of provocation had been involved, no matter who started it. but tristan had known all that going in and decided to rise to the bait anyway. it’s not that he isn’t capable of restraining himself when he wants to — situationally, he supposes — but he’s wanted to teach the little shit ( notwithstanding having about five inches on tris ) a lesson for quite some time. who was he to look a gift horse in the mouth, or whatever the saying is? the consequences be damned, as ever, and anyway, he can avoid them for a little longer, at least, reclined on a concrete bench hidden from view of the main building by a grove of trees. he holds an ice pack over his swollen eye as he stares blankly up at the sky as though dissociating completely. if only he truly could. unfortunately, his senses remained far too sharp after the fight to even consider drifting into oblivion.

he recognizes familiar footsteps drawing closer behind his head and he sighs, relieved at least that he hasn’t been caught yet by one of the school’s staff. at this rate, he could slip away from campus entirely without drawing attention, although no doubt he would then only put off whatever resolution the establishment believed was necessary to this little mishap. and either way, he doesn’t doubt any of that would have to wait until paige has the opportunity to say what she needs to say to him about the incident. he’s already anticipated that, at least to some degree, she’s bound to be upset with him, although she knows him well enough by now to realize how much good it’s likely to do. “ did anyone see you come back here? I know they’re looking for me. as if every single employee doesn’t realize that sebastian — ” he says it with a sarcastically fancy affectation, “ needed his ass kicked one of these days to humble him. ”

@wtrss liked for a starter !!

#wtrss #orphanage au tbt.#all i’m saying is that it’s AWFULLY BOLD OF HIM to make fun of someone else’s name for being a rich kid’s name #when his name just happens to be tristan. my guy. you sound like you WOULD be a rich prick.

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sxlver-sweet · 3 years

Note

feral possessive nakajima atsushi whose in a rut and he just wanna breed you🥺

i'm literally on the verge of passing out i went overboard with this i just—atsushi with a breeding kink snatched my soul right outta my pussy. this is definitely longer than i initially intended for it to be smh. this is also probably so horrendously ooc i’m so sorry i’ve never written for him before skdkfkdkx but we can imagine

you knew that atsushi’s ability alters his behavior every time his heat rolls around, sharpening his irises with a feral, borderline predatory acuity, heightening his senses until every little thing nearly either blinds or deafens him, and instilling within him a possessive desire to protect those dear to him—especially you. so, why you chose to poke and prod at the slumbering beast locked away in atsushi’s soul by deliberately making him jealous, you have no clue.

not that you can think anymore, anyway, with the position you’ve landed yourself in.

you squeal with surprise when atsushi plunges back into you for what your hazy mind deems the third time, your abused walls fluttering and clenching around his hardened cock. from his position kneeling between your legs, you can hear a sharp hiss filter between bared teeth, his furrowed eyebrows twitching and bare chest heaving with dwindling restraint. upon the abrupt intrusion, remnants of previous rounds gush around his cock, manifesting in an overflow of accumulated cum that splashes against your trembling, sticky thighs and streams down the curve of your ass in nacreous bands. the excess pools onto the sheets beneath you. you almost pout at the thought of them being ruined, only to have your mind wiped blank and limp body jostled by the sensation of atsushi’s hips canting back to deliver a particularly hard thrust that all but knocks the wind out of you. everything feels so filthy, so utterly licentious—from the way your nails scrabble against his pale flesh for purchase to the way your knees knock and slip against his sweat-slicked waist as you desperately coil your legs around him to the greedy, aimless laving of his tongue over your breasts; but, neither of you seem to care.

“atsushi!” you wail out, voice hoarse and fractured. you’re exhausted by now—muscles sore, throat burning, skin stained with the consequences of your misbehavior, and brain so scrambled that you can barely maintain enough control over your body to swallow the saliva threatening to spill over the corners of your mouth. you’ve apologized numerous times for provoking him, but your pitiful whines and protests merely fell upon deaf ears as atsushi continued to drill away at your poor cunt, far too preoccupied with chasing his own release and pumping you full of his cum to truly consider your own stamina or even acknowledge your repentant words.

“sorry, i’m sorry…” is all you’ve been hearing since atsushi first started relieving you of that tight, little dress that had been taunting him since you first shimmied into it. this time, it’s barely more than a pathetic whimper fanning against your shoulder as he thrusts into you. “‘just a little more, i promise,” his sweaty cheek bumps into your temple. feeling your walls buckle around him, he chokes back a growl. “shit—ah, don’t do that, baby.” he whines, swollen balls pulsing at the way your sweet cunt tightens around his cock like the most delicious and unforgiving vice. “gonna make me cum quick. you… feel so good—so tight. so damn pretty...” the staccato, wet popping of his heavy balls slapping against your ass at a relentless pace has you sputtering and babbling mindlessly. “pretty and mine.”

your eyes widen when atsushi’s hands clutch at your knees, lifting them up with ease and folding you into a mating press. he looms over you with darkened eyes, searing palms sliding down your calves to pin your ankles as close as possible to your ears. the new angle provided by the altered position and proffered leverage allows him to sink even deeper into you than before. you squirm feebly beneath him, feeling the leaking tip of his cock bump against your cervix with such force that you almost apologize for it being in his way. “i know, baby. i'm sorry, ‘m sorry,” atsushi reassures you breathlessly, leaning down to press a sloppy kiss to your forehead. “want to fill you up so badly—make you all mine. ‘s that okay?” his head falls to rest against yours, silver bangs drenched with sweat sticking to your forehead. “please, tell—shit, tell me it’s okay.” he shakes his head, glossy eyes apologetic. “not gonna stop—can’t stop…” he swallows hard, “unless you to tell me to.”

“it’s… a bit late for that.” you manage to huff out a laugh, referring to the load of cum he fucked into you only fifteen minutes prior that’s currently trickling down the crevice of your ass. “don’t you think?”

“mm,” the shaking of his head becomes feverish, his grip tightening on your ankles. “gonna make sure this one takes.” he pants. “so, i need you to tell me right now if you don’t want it.”

but, truth be told, you do want it.

so, you tell him.

and, boy… does he take advantage of it.

#bungou stray dogs smut #nakajima atsushi smut #atsushi smut #bsd smut #[candlelight.reverie] <3 #🍬arba’s aphrodisiacs🍬#$bsd.unfiltered

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the-chaotic-neutral-pansexual · 3 years

Text

Locked Up Sub!Shiro(Voltron)x GN!reader

CW: Smut, Dom/sub dynamics, chastity, praise, degradation, choking, punishment, implied prostate milking, anal sex/pegging mention, hand job, teasing, ownership, master kink, sadism mention, threats of future punishment.

Word count: 1.7k

A/N: This is my first request so it is a bit different from my usual work but I hope you are still able to enjoy it. My regular writing will resume this week.

This was written for a male reader but like most of my writing, there aren't really any gendered terms so it ended up being gender-neutral.

“You know what Shiro I’m at my wit’s end,” you say angrily “I’ve let your behavior slide for far too long without consequence.”

“Listen I’m sorry” he replies desperately. “It’s just with the team I’ve been so stressed and-”

“No” you cut him off calmly “I understand how you feel but that is not an excuse, you broke the rules” you continue. “Now you’re gonna use your words and tell me exactly what you did”

“I touched myself”

“And…”

“And I came without your permission’’

“You’re usually so good for me Shiro,” you say walking past him toward your bedroom “I’m sorry baby, but I have to punish you”

He follows you pleading “No please, I’m sorry I won’t do it again” his begging falls upon deaf ears as you reach into your toybox looking for the proper punishment. “ he continues trying to appeal to your softer nature “ come on master you know that I’m not bad, I just made a mistake. I was so needy and I just couldn’t help myself.”

Just as those words leave his mouth your hand moves from the flogger to the cage. If your good boy couldn’t help himself then it’s your responsibility to do it for him.

However, before you lock him up you decide to play with him a bit. “Aww you were needy for me Shiro?” you ask.

He doesn’t seem to notice your condescending tone as he answers “yes (Y/N), I missed you so much”

“It’s okay baby, I forgive you. Come sit” you sit on the bed, motioning for him to do the same.

He quickly moves to sit, he’s too busy falling into subspace to notice the cage you have sitting on the nightstand a mere few feet away.

As he sits down you begin groping his large, muscular frame, having your way with him as you whisper sweet nothings in his ear. You maneuver to sit behind him using one hand to grab his torso while sliding the other into his sweatpants.

“Strip for me baby,” you say, even though your tone was gentle you both knew that it was not a request but rather an order. Of course, he obliged, quickly getting up to remove his clothes before placing himself back in your embrace.

You take your hand spitting in it before slowly moving down his ripped body to wrap around his cock. He lets out a low groan closing his eyes and letting his head fall back onto your shoulder.

You use your other hand to push your fingers into his mouth, gathering some of his spit before moving to his chest to tease his nipples. Groans continue falling from his lips as you pleasure his body like he had been craving for so long.

“Does that feel good Shiro?” you ask lowly.

“Yes master, please” he whimpers out pathetically

“Please what baby”

“Please hngg- please faster”

Deciding to be nice you oblige speeding up your actions on his dick. He’s so wet by this point leaking precum all over your hand, the arousal sliding down his ass and dirtying the sheets.

With every second that passes he loses himself further until finally the only thought that remained on his mind was cumming. The only thing he desired was his release.

“Cum please master can I cum?” he begs, so blissed out that he could barely get the words out straight.

“Sure baby go ahead,” you say with a borderline sadistic smirk that was hidden from him.

“Hmmph thannnk you massterr” he slurs out the words before his mouth falls open in pleasure. Drool dripping down his chin in his fucked out state.

After a few more strokes of your hand, he releases. Squirting a big, thick, creamy load of opaque cum right in your hand. The volume couldn’t be contained in your palm thus making a mess all over his torso and your bed.

“Thank you” he repeats fully leaning back laying his body weight on you, exhausted from his orgasm.

While he’s still coming down from his high you reach over to your nightstand grabbing some tissues to clean him up.

After you deem him clean enough you reach over to the nightstand once again. Shiro lays on you eyes closed unsuspecting as you grab his soft cock beginning to position the cage.

He’s half asleep as he begins talking to you.

“I really am sorry for breaking your rules sir”

“It’s ok I forgive you,” you say while caressing his chest. You slowly begin to move your hand up.

“But just because I forgive you doesn’t mean you aren’t going to be punished” you whisper in his ear. Your hand wraps around his throat with one hand while the other finishes tightening the cage around him.

Once he fully feels the cold tight metal around his cock his eyes shoot open and he looks down. Sure enough, he was locked in a cage.

“Now let’s see if you can control yourself, Shiro”

Present-day

It’s been 2 months. 2 months of torture according to Shiro. 2 months of deserved punishment according to you.

While some may say this was too cruel you had to make sure that he wouldn’t disobey you again. The punishment was only supposed to last a few weeks but then 1 week in you caught Shiro trying to cum around his cage. Clearly, if you wanted him to behave then you needed to be cruel.

And so it went. He spent every day trying to occupy his mind so that way his neediness wouldn’t lead him to disobey you.

In the mornings he would distract himself by making breakfast and packing lunch

During the afternoon he would absolutely bury himself in work.

His evenings were spent training. Hopefully, if he wore himself out, he would be too tired to be horny he thought.

And at night he would make a nice dinner before going to bed early. At least if he was asleep then he could cum in his dreams.

After the incident at the beginning of his punishment, Shiro started to avoid you. Not necessarily because he wanted to but because you would tease him relentlessly.

You would tease him in the mornings by whispering filthy things in his ear with your raspy morning voice.

You would give him orders while making him use your title in the afternoon.

You would undress him with your eyes while he trained before stripping off your shirt and joining him in the evenings.

You would follow him into the kitchen groping him from behind while he cooked dinner at night.

He may have been able to handle being caged if it wasn’t for you. It was almost as if you were trying to make him disobey you… again.

However, he stayed strong. After his first slip up he was finally able to control himself for the remaining time of the punishment.

And finally, after a grueling 2 months, it was over.

One night while Shiro was getting ready for bed you slowly make your way into the room closing the door behind you which alerts him to your presence.

“Hey Shiro,” you say in a flirty tone that usually occupied your voice when speaking to him.

“Hey” he replies with a heavy sigh mentally preparing himself for more of your teasing.

You make your way behind him and begin teasing all over his body until he stops you abruptly with a somewhat irritated look on his face.

“What’s wrong,” you ask with a teasing smirk adorning your features.

“Listen (Y/N) it’s been a long day can we please do this tomorrow?” he asks sounding genuinely exhausted.

“Aww baby, you had a bad day?” you ask sounding still teasing but a bit more sincere than usual.

“Yes it was hard and long and I would just like to forget about it” he states sounding defeated.

“I may have something that can help you” you resume your testing “but it will also be hard and long,” you say surprisingly able to keep a straight face at your admittedly juvenile joke.

You reach down to grab his caged cock as you grind against his ass.

“Master please don’t tease me right now i-”

“What makes you think I’m gonna tease you?” you ask cutting him off.

“That’s all you’ve done for the past two months” he whines

“Two months has it really been that long,” you ask despite already knowing the answer.

“Yes it’s been so long master” he begins to grind back against you “I don’t know how much more I can take”

“You’re right Shiro Two months is a pretty long time, you must be so pent up” you continue teasing slowly moving to rid him of his shirt.

“Yes master” he lifts his arms “I’m so full”

“Tell me, Shiro, have you learned your lesson?”

“Yes I have learned my lesson master, I will never disobey you again I promise” he all but yells out desperately “please just help me” he begs.

“You better have learned your lesson, if not then next time it will be worse” you threaten “if you disobey my rules again then I’ll have to lock up you’re useless cock indefinitely”

“Yes master I understand please just let me cum, milk me dry” he cries “Haven’t I been so good for you?”

“Yes, baby I suppose you have,” you say before moving from behind him. He whines thinking you left him high and dry again however all of his worries are pacified as he hears the telltale jingle of keys.

“My poor baby, it must hurt to be so full for so long,” you say with false sympathy lacing your tone “don’t worry tonight I’ll give you what you need” you slide his pants down beginning to free his cock from its confines. “I’m gonna milk you dry, abusing your prostate with my cock until you have nothing left to give” you state “unless you’re still too tired?”

“NO, I’M FINE” “not tired at all master I promise”

“Good because we have a long night ahead of us,” you say. Shiro was so caught up in the anticipation of being able to cum that he missed the sadistic undertones in your statement. This was going to be fun.

#voltron #voltron x reader #voltron smut #shiro x reader #dom!reader #male reader #gender neutral reader #shiro voltron #shiro vld #vld shiro

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xtodorcki · 3 years

Note

Hello!! :> May I request an imagine where Levi and reader are now exes and he becomes jealous after finding out reader has a new S/O?? Like I wanna know his reactions and behavior when he gets jealous hehe :)) also thank u so much for taking the time to write ur so talented 🥺

“Jealousy,” Levi x Reader

Summary: you and Levi have been separated for some time but once he finds out you have a new partner, he gets jealous and acts out of character.

Warnings: rough sex 🛐

You and Levi have been broken up for what feels like forever but in reality has only been between six months to a year. You would admit the first few months were terrible, you considered Levi the first and only person you’ll be deeply in love with.

But time went on and someone had asked you out on a few dates then soon things were made official. You and Levi still somewhat talked, just as associates considering you worked in the scout regiment under Hange’s team.

Levi felt at fault for the break up and he wanted to desperately come back to you. The nights he would stand outside your door, debating whether or not he should knock would just end up with him leaving.

But one day when you were working at the base, your new boyfriend had made a unexpected visit to drop off some food for you.

You could feel Levi’s eyes burning into your back as you stood across the room talking with your boyfriend and holding the plate of food he had made for you. It was awkward, you felt nervous as your palms grew sweaty.

“Thank you.” You quietly said when it was time for him to go and he quickly placed a kiss on your lips before walking out the door.

The way your cheeks heated up as you walked back to the table, sitting down and your gaze met Levi’s intense deadly stare and you gulped the lump down in your throat.

The amount of jealousy he had felt running through his veins made his blood boil. He didn’t know about your new boyfriend and now that he has seen it first hand, he wanted to rip everyone apart.

The anger that was begging to be let out as he abruptly pushed the chair out and standing up before stomping down the hallway, making all the scouts watch him with a look of terror on their faces.

Angry Levi meant a lot of cleaning half the time but this time he was quiet and exited the room before he wanted to scream at you.

He loved you, he still loves you and the way his heart had broke and made his chest feel empty- he wanted to drop dead.

You knew why he stormed off but you didn’t want to bring yourself to go check if he was okay, you two weren’t together anymore and he had to face that reality.

But the side of you that cared for him too much was on the edge of your brain, forcing you to get up and go follow him. Your heart ached everyday when you would see him, your heart would break as you cried almost every night and you wanting him next to you but he blew his chance and you were over waiting for him to get over his ego.

Levi was in his office, throwing stuff around to release the anger boiling out of him. You heard glass shattering and things being thrown as you stood outside, debating whether or not you should see him.

Would seeing you make him more angry? Would it set him off? You didn’t know but you brought your small hand to the doorknob, slowly turning it and once it was open- you got a full view of how messy his office was and all the broken things laid out on the floor.

“Levi?” You said barley over a whisper, making his head snap towards where you were and the jealousy had lingered off of him at the sight of you.

You closed the door behind you, the look of sadness on your face as you looked around then walked over to where he stood, by the window with his focus back to it as he stared outside, not wanting to even look at you. It pained him.

He was quiet, the pain swelling up inside of him made his eyes water but he was good at swallowing his feelings and holding everything back.

As you stood behind him, your hand reaching up to rest on his shoulder- he flinched and shrugged it off in an instant and it had made your heart ache.

“Levi, please.. talk to me.”

His head turned to look down at you, the way he let out a chuckle then started to laugh as he shook his head. He felt as if you were pretending to care about his well being and he thought it was funny.

“Why the hell are you here, Y/N? To piss me off more? To make me more jealous? Because it’s working.” He said coldly, crossing his arms over his chest and looking away from you again.

“What? No, I wanted to make sure you’re alright..” Levi cut you off as he glared at you.

“If I’m alright? Seriously? Is that some fucking joke? Why not take the rest of the day off and go spend it with your new toy. Why not this? You’re fired.” Everything had rushed out of his mouth in the heat of the moment, the anger edged him on even more.

Your eyes went wide, listening to his words and you grew silent for a moment. You had so much love for him, even till this day you did and you couldn’t express how much it hurt you to see him like this.

“Levi, please.”

“Just fucking leave, alright?”

“No.” You said out loud, making his body turn to face you and the scary look on his face had terrified you a bit but deep down, you knew it was just because he was hurting.

“No?”

“No..” You started to say with more confidence, shaking your head at him as you opened your mouth to speak again.

“Levi, I still love you and I think I’ll always love you. You were everything to me, you are everything to me. Seeing you like this sucks because I never wanted to hurt you but I couldn’t continue waiting around for you to come back.. I waited and cried all alone for you and you never came. How is that fair? Did you want me to wait forever? Did you want me to wait for years for you to drop your stupid ass ego to come back and actually love me?” He stared at you, stunned and the water that had built up in your eyes had made him soften up a bit.

The guilt washing over him had made it painful to even look at you but the image of your boyfriend kissing you continued to replay in his mind which just kept his anger there, he was angry and couldn’t think straight as he cupped your face and smashed his lips on yours.

The kiss was rough, full of jealousy and anger but also full of passion. The same sparks and fireworks you felt when you were with him were still there. Levi had this hold on you, captivating you and keeping you in place. You were still deeply in love with him and he knew that while you had kissed him back.

In the back of your mind, you knew this was wrong. You knew you should pull away but you let it continue and you let Levi back you up until the back of your legs had hit the edge of his desk, his hands pushing you down as your back was pressed on the hard wood with his body hovering over you while keeping his lips in place on yours.

The more time passed by, the more angry he gotten. His rough lips biting and sucking on spots of your neck as your hands tugged on the strands of his hair.

“Levi- wait,” You suddenly said, the feeling of guilt washing over you but Levi didn’t care.

His darkened eyes met with yours, you could still see the anger and the rage behind them as a lump formed in your throat, making you too scared to speak up but he caught on.

“Hm?” He hummed, a evil smile coming across his face as his hand wrapped around your throat and moved his face to hover over yours, his lips barely brushing against yours.

“I want to remind you who you belong to.”

You gulped down the lump in your throat, your eyes staying on his as he smirked and placed one gentle kiss on your lips as his hand on your throat tightened slightly.

“I want you to go home tonight to that toy of yours and remember who made you feel this good. I want you reminded that you’re mine and always will be no matter what boy you bring home.” His words were like poison but at the same time it had you addicted, the way his harsh words had turned you on more than what you thought was possible.

Levi knew you didn’t want him to stop, he knew he had you weak under his touch as his lips continued to trail down your neck, his fingers soon grabbing your shirt and practically ripping open the buttons, some of them popping clean off and landed on the floor of his office.

He was quick to throw every piece of clothing off, including his own and he had moved to where he stood in front of his desk, dragging your legs forward as he pulled you to sit up on the edge, his lips back on yours.

He wasn’t gentle with any of his movements, he wanted to leave you with marks and wanted to leave reminders on your body on who did this. The jealousy only fed his ego and fed into how rough he was being with you.

The way he took no time to rest his hand on your lower while he thrusted into you with no warning, making a loud noise slip out of your mouth and into his. His other hand went up to your hair, grabbing a handful and yanked your head back as he looked down at you.

One of your hands had a tight hold of his bicep, nails digging into his skin while the other held onto the edge of his desk to keep you sitting upright but the more harder he thrusted, the harder it was for you to even sit up straight.

He made sure you kept your eyes on his, his hand grabbing your chin and forcing your mouth open, a wide smirk on his face before he hovered over your mouth, spitting into it and forcing your mouth closed.

His actions had you almost cumming on command. Half of it felt wrong but your body ached and pushed towards him the more he touched you. No thoughts of the consequences later, just thoughts on Levi and the way he knew how to make you feel good in seconds.

“Now tell me who you belong to.” He abruptly said, making your teeth latch down onto your bottom lip to muffle your moans but his hand held onto your throat, waiting for an answer.

“Y- you.” You stuttered, your face mixing with pleasure as you tried to keep your eyes open.

“Say it again.” He had leaned down, licking a strip up your throat and place his mouth right below your jawline.

“I’m yours, Levi.” You said with a bit more confidence, your voice still shaky as your legs started to shake against his torso.

Everything had sent you over the moon, the way his hips were perfectly slapping against yours and the way he would purposely moan into your ear so you can hear how good you’re making him feel- it was all sending you over the edge.

You didn’t realize how much you had missed Levi until this point. You didn’t realize how hot he could be when he was insanely jealous. You should’ve done this a long time ago to be treated like this, it was addicting.

“That’s my girl.” The three words had slipped off his tongue and his eyes had met yours, instantly making you more weak than what you felt right now.

He knew you were close just by the way your legs started to shake while your walls gripped around his length and he was purposely trying to get you to cum just by using his words and it worked right after he had said those three words, instantly making you throw your head back and cum around him, your body growing sensitive as his thrusts continued.

Levi finally pulled out of you after he filled you up completely, his tongue running over his lips and he grabbed a hold of your hair again to force you to meet his gaze. His lips pressed against yours, this time it was gentle and soft and he took his time to move his lips in sync with yours.

You were breathless, your eyes looking over Levi’s bare chest when you pulled back from his mouth and it had made you feel butterflies all over again.

“I better see you at my doorstep tonight after you let that toy know who you really belong to.” He mumbled, his fingers combing through your hair and he looked at you with so much love and pain because he didn’t want to let you go again.

“I’ll be at your place before nine, promise.”

“Good.”

Bruh I know this request didn’t say smut but I couldn’t resist pls. Jealous Levi would definitely throw you over a desk and rail your shit and I would let him🛐

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#levi ackerman fanfic #levi ackerman imagine #levi ackerman imagines #levi ackerman x reader #levi ackerman headcanons #levi Ackerman smut #levi Ackerman #levi smut #levi imagines #levi fanfic #levi x reader #levi headcanons #aot headcanons #aot imagines

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blackstar95 · 3 years

Text

The Brothers reaction when MC slaps their ass

Lucifer

As usual, Lucifer listened to some classical music and poured himself a glass of wine to relax a bit.

Once he was done, he brought the glass to his lips and took a sip, savoring the taste.

"Mhm," he hummed to the sound of the melody and blissfully closed his eyes, enjoying the quiet moment he was having.

Much to his dismay, you entered his office without making yourself noticable.

Now dont get me wrong, he loves enjoys your company.

But not when your main goal is to tease him.

An thats exactly what you were doing.

You grinned mischievously as you slowly crept up to him, his back turned to you.

Since he was in his own state of mind, he didn't noticed anything.

That was until you reached your hand out.

In that milisecond, Lucifer's senses were tingling and his eyes shot open, turning around as fast as lightning.

But it was too late.

He only watched as your right hand colided with his left buttcheek, giving it a good squeeze afterwards.

Lucifer jumped and just stared at you in shock, processing what just happend.

And you just stood there with an empty expression, your eyes starring at your palm.

"Wow, your butt is actuallly softer than I thought".

Lucifer furrowed his brows in anger and shook his head.

"MC".

"Yeah?" You asked, looking up at him innocently.

Lucifer had that closed eyed smile with an dark aura surrounding him.

"Now, what made you think this was an good idea, MC?".

You shrugged and slowly walked backwards, shivering nervously "I dont know.. I was just curious?"

"Curious?" He met up with your steps and tilted his head to the side, his smile never leaving

He became dangerously close, making you more nervous than you already are.

You felt your back hitting the wall and your eyes widened.

Oh lord...

Lucifer slammed his palm beside your head, caging you.

You flinched and looked to the ground, feeling suddenly so tiny under him.

Lucifer cupped your cheek and made you look back up at him, a sadistic smile on his lips.

"Such inappropriate behavior should be punished, MC"

I leave the rest up to your imagination.

Mammon

Mammon was walking beside you as always, being practically attached to your hip (nothing new).

You guys were at R.A.D on your way to the cafeteria, since it was break time.

The greedy demon beside you rambled about that new scheme to make money, and you once again had to talk him out of it.

"Ya! It aint a dumb idea!" He protested.

"It is Mammon. Just think about Lucifers reaction and the consequences," you shook your head "Want to hang from the ceiling that bad?".

Mammon only scuffed, turning his head to the side.

You glanced over to him and noticed a visible pout on his lips, making him look like a child.

"Hey, Mammon".

"Hm?" He looked over at you "What's up?".

You raised your hand and reached over for his bottom, smiling sweetly at him.

"Cheer up".

He was about to question you, but before he could even start his sentence, you cutted him off with a real loud smack on his ass.

Mammons stopped dead in his tracks and his eyes widened in shock "W-what?".

Once realisation kicked in, his face flushed in an intsant.

"O-oi, human! Whats the big deal slappin' my butt like that?!". He yelled at you, looking like a fricking tomato.

You couldnt help but let out a few chuckles, highly amused by his reaction.

"Ya! It aint funny!"

Thanks to his loud voice, the whole hallway now knew what just had happened.

Leviathan

Leviathan walked down the stairs to the dining room.

He was really excited because he finally got his hands on the new Ruri-chan merchandise that came out.

"Woaah! I cant believe I got that limited edition figurine!, its SO rare and the new outfit- its just soo angelic-"

Levi being caught in his own ramblings didnt noticed that you were walking beside him.

"And that new hairstyle! I cant believe Ruri-chan could get even more cuter than she already is-"

"Say Levi, to who'm are you talking to?"

"WAh!", Levi jumped slightly at the sound of your voice and almost tripped over his own foot.

"Wha- MC!? How long have you been here!?"

You smiled at him and grabbed his shoulder for support, preventing him from falling down the stairs.

"There there, calm down. I didnt heard much".

Levi let out an sigh of relief and turned to you.

"Yeah right, I mean who would want to listen to an yucky otaku like me?".

You facepalmed in your mind and sighed, he really needs more confidence.

Leviathan kept walking and pitying himself, mumbling random stuff.

He has such a negative mindset.

You walked up behind him not thinking much.

But then you stared at his head and then his back,

Eventually your eyes landed on his bottom.

You smirked to yourself as you just ran past him, giving his butt a hard and loud smack.

Levi yelped in surprise and stood still, overwhelmed with what just had happened.

His hand grabbed his right buttcheek and rubbed it, being too shocked to react.

You turned around and waved at him. "Damn Levi, you really got an nice butt there! Im soo jealous!"

You then disapperaed in the dining room.

Levis brain needed a whole minute to process what just had happened.

And then he became a stuttering mess.

"M-M-MC! W-what was that now?!, h-hey wait!" He hid his flushed face behind the back of his hand as he stumbled after you.

Ngl he was kinda happy you touched him.

Satan

Satan was on kitchen duty, cooking his curry.

He invited you to join and help, so you guys could spend some time together.

And theres no way you would ignore that chance.

So here you were beside him, giving him the ingredients he asks for and making some small talk.

"Did you know that Beel almost ate my hair in his sleep?" You sighed "Im lucky im not bald".

Satan glimpsed at you and raised his eyebrow, shaking his head, "His hunger really doesnt know its limits".

He looked up, "Well speaking of sleep, I had an unpleasant dream last night."

You handed him the spoon and nodded "What was it about?"

Satan sighed, "Beel ate too much and grew to be a giant. He then ate the House of Lamentation, leaving the rest of us homeless".

You laughed, "Why do I have a feeling that could actually happen?"

Satan frowned "He already eats plates, its only a matter of time until he starts eating the walls".

You chuckled, intending to jokingly slap his arm.

But since you werent focused on what you were doing, you didnt notice how your slap landed right on his butt.

Satan dropped the spoon he was holding and looked at you with wide eyes.

"What are you doing?"

You turned to him with an confused expression "Did I do something wrong?"

Satan cocked an eyebrow and leaned his head to the side "You just slapped my butt".

Now its your turn to look at him with wide eyes. "I did what now?".

Satan didnt knew if you were joking or not, and it was kinda ticking him off.

"My butt. You slapped it".

"No I only slapped your arm- ohh wait..." you chuckled.

"What is so funny?" He asked you with furrowed brows.

"Sorry Satan, I wasnt focusing on what I was doing and accidently slapped your butt instead of your arm," You shrugged "My bad".

Satan nodded and turned back to what he was doing "Next time be more careful, or I will return the gesture".

You smirked and leaned over to him "I wouldnt mind that".

He will remember that.

Asmodeus

Asmo was having a mid-life crisis.

He was on one of his diets, because his waist gained 1 millicentimeter.

You assured him that a little more weight always looks good and healthy but he wont listen.

So here you were infront of him, eating one of his favorite Cupcakes.

"MC darling, why do you have to torture me like that?"

He whined "Its not faair!"

You just shrugged "I have another cupcake left for you, but since you're on your little 'diet' I will give it to Beel."

He sighed and dropped his head on the table "Does my pain bring you pleasure?".

You frowned "I-"

Asmo gasps and sat back up straight. "Dont tell me your into that stuff?, Wow!"

He smiled and wiggled in his chair.

You sighed and shook you head "Asmodeus, stop".

He pouted "You're no fun..".

After some time you finally finished the cupcake and Asmodeus had reached his limit.

He watched as you stood up and walk towards to the kitchen.

"Wait, what are you doing?" He also stood up and followed you.

"I will bring the cupcake to Beel-"

"No, wait!" he grabbed your wrist and stared at you.

You looked back at him "What is it, Asmodeus?".

He glimpsed to the side "I dont want him to eat my cupcake.."

You clicked your tounge and pulled him towards you, making him stumble to the side

"What are you doi- AH!" He moaned yelped in surprise as you slapped his ass.

"Just eat that damn Cupcake. Its not like you will gain 10kg from it".

He blushed "Oooooh MC! That really made me excited! How harsh you pulled my wrist-"

You just let go of him and left the room.

"MC where are you going?, you cant just leave me here!"

Beelzebub

Beelzebub asked you to keep him company while working out.

And of course you said yes.

So now you sat there, on the bench with a towel in hand, enjoying the view infront of you.

Beelzebubs biceps flexed as he lifted weights, and his white tanktop was drenched in sweat, making it transparent.

His abs showed through the fabric and you blushed.

How can this man be so big and muscular?

You blinked when he stopped his workout and laid the weights back down.

He grabbed his bottle from the floor and drank from it, taking big gulps.

You decided to stand up and walked over to him.

"Hey, Beel"

Beel lowered the bottle from his mouth and smiled at you "Hey, MC!"

You smiled back, and held the towel in your hand out to him, "Here take this".

"Thanks" He nodded at you and grabbed it, wiping the sweat on his face away.

"So, how is the workout going so far?" You asked couriously.

"Im still warming up" he replied.

You blinked, Still at warming up, huh?.. impressive.

"But im starting to feel hungry..." Beel pouted.

You laughed "You can do it Beelzebub, I believe in you".

He blushed and smiled at you "Thanks, MC!"

So cute.

You nodded and patted his shoulder "Sure".

Beel proceeded to start his warm up again, starting with some sit-ups.

But you had other plans.

"Beel wait!" You ran up to him.

He stopped what he was doing and looked over at you "What is it, MC?"

Before he could fully turn his body to you, he felt a stinging sensitation on his butt.

He looked at you startled, now realising you slapped it.

"Wow Beel, your buttcheeks are pretty hard.. are they made of iron or something?" You hold your hand up to your face.

Beel blushed slightly, not knowing what to do or say.

You just shrugged and turned around, marching towards the bench you were sitting on.

But suddenly, you felt a light clap on your own butt.

You gasped, "What-, Beel?!" You looked behind you and saw him standing there, smiling.

"Your butt feels really soft and nice, MC". he chuckled, "Is that a human thing to do?"

"Beel no-"

Belphegor

Belphegor was taking a nap in the attic, skipping the student council meeting.

And since you were coming late to the meeting due to some complications, Lucifer ordered you to search for Belphie and bring him there along with you.

And thats how you ended up infront of the attic, clearly annoyed.

"Belphegor," you spoke as you opened the door "I know you're in here".

The youngest brother laid on the bed, snoring and cuddling into his cow pillow.

You walked over to him and shook him "Hey Belphegor! Wake up!"

He stirred in his sleep and furrowed his brows.

Eventually he opened one eye and glimpsed at you. "What is it?"

"Lucifer wants me to bring you to the council meeting" you explained.

"Too bad, I wont go" he closed his eyes again. "Why dont you join me?"

"No," you shook your head, "Please, stand up".

He groaned "No, I dont want to go".

Thats it

You grabbed Belphegor by his arms, and turned him on his stomach.

His eyes shot open "Dah! W-what, hey-"

You raised your hand and slapped his ass, the sound of it echoing through the room.

Belphegor jumped and sat up straight, looking at you in disbelief.

"What was that for?!" He blushed

"You should stand up," you crossed your arm over your chest "I asked you nicely but you wont listen".

"Alright..," He closed his eyes "I will go"

You nodded "good"

But before you could turn around, Belphegor grabbed your wrist and laid you over his lap, his hand resting on your butt.

You blushed when you realised what he was doing,

You tried to escape, but his grip on you was too tight.

"Heheh," he chuckled "Time for payback".

"B-belphegor-" you were interrupted by his hand squeezing your left cheek slightly, making you shiver.

Belphegor raised his hand and striked an direct slap on your butt.

He expected you to squeak cutely, but instead a loud moan left your lips.

You quickly sat up and covered your mouth, an massive blush on your face.

Belphegor stared at you with wide eyes,

But after a few seconds he smirked.

"Didnt knew you're into that stuff," he teased you "Im not complaining though".

You just hid your face in his shoulder, too embarassed to look up "Dont tell anyone about this..".

Belphegor chuckled and patted your head "I wont, that would ruin the fun".

He will still tease you about it tho, but just when you guys are alone.

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hihellogoodbyebruh · 3 years

Text

I Know What You’re Thinking, You’re On My Mind (You’re Right)

Pairing: Angel Reyes x Black!Plus Size!Reader

Summary: Y/N and Angel are in love and these are different moments in the span of their relationship.

Warning(s): Just a lot of fluffy goodness....okay some angst (it’s me lol) but mostly fluff

Word count: 2,526

AN: This is kind of a songfic, but also not really? I think of it as a bunch of drabbles loosely connected by random parts of a song. Song title and inspo from Come Close by Common ft. Mary J. Blige. The sweetest little fic I’ve ever written. Fat Black girls deserve to be loved loudly. This is for us. As always, questions, comments, and concerns are welcomed. Happy reading lovelies! xo

Smile, happiness, you could model it And when you feel opposite I just want you to know Your whole, being is beautiful I'ma do the best I can do Cause I'm my best when I'm with you

The sound of a domino being slammed on the table caused several other park goers to turn their heads and see a striking woman jumping out of her seat.

“That’s domino bitches! Y’all really thought you could beat me in dominoes? Shoulda checked my credentials mofos!” Y/N shouted, a huge smile on her face as she talked shit.

The guys around the table all groaned and huffed as she celebrated her win. Coco swore up and down that he would be the winner and Gilly was just as sure that he would be the one. EZ just wanted to play and Angel kept his mouth shut knowing his girl had been playing dominoes with her father and uncles practically all her life.

“Whatever, Y/N. You not seeing me in poker.” Coco grumbled, though he was fighting to keep a smile off his face. He was impressed.

“Well this aint poker is it? Run me my money.” She replied, rubbing her fingers together before holding out her hand.

The men all pulled out their wallets and placed the correct amount of money into Y/N’s hands. She grinned as she fanned herself with the money before draping her body across the smirking Angel’s lap.

“Oh hey there sexy. If you’re nice I might buy you something with this considerable fortune I just won.” Y/N winked.

“You my sugar mama now?” Angel teasingly asked.

“I do taste sweet so I think I fit the description.”

“Damn right you do.” He smirked, before leaning down to kiss Y/N’s lips.

Santo Padre’s mayor, Antonia Pena, had put together a community fair to help raise money for the town and uplift spirits. It was also a great way for local businesses to showcase what they have to offer. Services and items were put into a raffle that everyone who attended the event got entered into. Y/N even managed to convince Felipe to have a little booth to show off his fine cuts of meat and how they could best be used in meals.

Angel was so in awe of her. She managed to pull even his grumpy ass father out of the house and she was constantly a source of light in his life. He doesn’t know how he got so lucky, but he knew he never wanted to let her go. He loved her more than anything and he knew she felt the same about him. She never doubted him or made him feel inadequate. She understood even the ugly parts of him. Didn’t excuse or condone his behavior, but she understood it and always reassured him that she knew he could do better.

“Whatchu staring at?” She asked, after the kiss ended and he kept his intense gaze on her.

“My whole world.” He answered honestly and she felt herself get a little emotional.

“If you make me cry in public, I will hurt you.”

“Don’t threaten me with a good time.” He replied, nipping at her shoulder and making her grin.

I know in the past, love Has been sort of hard on you But I see the God in you I just want to nurture it Though this love may hurt a bit

Neither of them had the best track record when it came to relationships. Angel had an awful habit of doing things without thinking about the consequences of his actions. Impulsive isn’t a strong enough word to describe how he is. He runs on emotion a lot of the time. It frustrates Y/N to no end. She doesn’t operate like that. She rarely if ever acts on impulse. She thinks too much. Worries too much about how people will react to her and her actions. Her hesitance to engage in things before she’s run every possible scenario through her head makes Angel want to pull his hair out. He hates seeing her unsure of herself. He makes it his mission to help her just get lost in the moment sometimes. And she tries her hardest to slow him down and make him think more on things before he acts.

His lifestyle also guaranteed their love won’t always be sunshine and roses. The first time Angel got hurt Y/N thought she was going to pass out. The level of panic and fear she felt almost took her down. When she finally got to see him in the hospital bed, she burst into tears. Once he was healed, she tried to pull away from him but he wouldn’t let her. The one time Y/N was verbally and physically accosted in front of Angel, he almost shot someone right in front of her. The need to protect her almost overrode his need to keep her away from the more violent side of himself.

The silence was deafening. Neither one was ready to take the first step and speak. The whole ride back home, Y/N never said a word. Not when Angel was getting chewed out by Bishop or when several people practically gawked at her even as they tried to make it seem like they weren’t. She was silent as she went through her nightly routine and prepared for bed.

It was as she sat on the edge of the bed, preparing to slide under the covers that Angel finally snapped.

“You’re really not gonna fucking say anything?” He practically growled at her, glaring at her from where he stood at the foot of the bed. He had on his usual sleepwear of a tank top and sweats.

She sighed, “What do you want me to say Angel?”

“Anything. Cuss me out, kiss me, or I don’t know, maybe thank me?” He suggested, sarcasm in his voice at the last part because he was clearly exasperated.

She cut her eyes at him fiercely. “Thank you? You want me to thank you?”

“Yes.” He stubbornly confirmed.

She shot up from the bed and spun to face him full on. She had never been so mad at him. “Thank you Angel for causing a bigger scene. Thank you Angel for almost igniting a war between two gangs over one stupid joke. Thank you for putting yourself in harm's way and almost giving me a heart attack. Thank you so much Angel.”

“That’s bullshit and you know it. It wasn’t just a stupid joke. You think I care so little about you that I wouldn’t fuck someone up for you?”

“I’ve heard way worse..” She argued, so used to minimizing her pain. Her dismissal of the incident as something trivial made him even more pissed.

“I don’t give a damn what you heard. Aint nobody gonna disrespect you in front of me and think I’m just gonna let that shit slide.”

“You could have killed him.”

“I DON’T GIVE A FUCK.” He exploded, making her freeze and stare at him with her mouth slightly open. “You’re mine. I don’t know what kinda cowards you been dealing with before, but I don’t play that shit. There is no joking when it comes to you. Not from some hijo de puta who has the audacity to put his hands on you. He’s lucky the only thing I did was bust him in the head with my pistol.”

“Angel…..” She sighed, her eyes closing as she took in his words. She understood his point but was still uncomfortable with the methods.

He walked over to her and cupped her face in his hands. He kissed her forehead before resting his head on hers. He spoke only after she opened her eyes, “You can be mad. I already know you are, but I’m not apologizing for protecting you.”

She had to get used to being loved and protected so adamantly by someone. So often left to comfort herself and bury her hurt, it took her a while to accept Angel’s form of protection. A part of her kept her guard up waiting for him to turn it against her, but that day never came. Any violent outbursts he had in her presence were never directed at her and so she found herself trusting him whole-heartedly. Her love for him deepened as time moved forward.

You helped me to discover me I just want you to put trust in me

Y/N loved Pops and she enjoyed the family dinners with him and EZ, but she knew he was not the perfect father. He made mistakes and Angel still hasn’t completely dealt with the issues the mistakes left him with. Everything just got buried. She knew when he was starting to feel inadequate or like he didn’t deserve her because he would become even more clingy. He was already very affectionate with her, always having a hand on her back and kissing her head. She loved how open he was, but when he was going through it the touches would have a desperate edge to them. Like he was trying to prove something.

A new episode of Joseline’s Cabaret played on the tv showing off the Puerto Rican Princess’ latest antics. Y/N had on sweats and a tank top as she laid on your back and giggled at the fight on her screen. She doesn't know why she watches that show, but it was entertaining.

Her front door opened and in walked the man she’d been seeing for a year now.

“What did I tell you about leaving this door unlocked?”

“I knew you were coming over so why would I lock it?” She argued, tilting her head back to watch Angel toe off his shoes and take off his kutte.

“You’re so hard headed.” He slapped the outside of her thigh and leaned in for a kiss before lying in between her legs. His head rested on her stomach and her hands immediately began running through his hair. His hands ran over her thighs as he buried his face in her belly and just breathed her in.

“You walked right in so obviously I was right.” Her hands moved from his hair to slide down his back, feeling for any new bruises. “How was your day? Do I gotta kick someone’s ass for messing with my man?” She asked, a teasing tone to her words even though she was kinda being serious.

“I’m all good, mi dulce.” He responded, already knowing her touches were to comfort him but also give herself some peace of mind that he was with her and he was still whole.

It was quiet for a moment before Angel propped his chin on her belly and looked at her. She brought her attention from the television to him. There was a gentle look in his eyes, full of love but also a vulnerability that made her heart clench.

“You love me right?” He gripped her hips tightly as he searched her eyes for the truth in her words.

Her eyes widened at his question. “Of cour-”

He interrupted her. “Because I love you so damn much, querida. I know I’m not easy, but I try to be better for you.”

“Angel…” Her hand gently caressed his cheek as she softly smiled at him. “You are my favorite person in this whole world. You love me like no other and I’ll always love you. Never forget that. And when you do, I’ll be here to remind you.” She leaned forward to kiss his lips and felt his grip on her hips loosen.

The two shared loving kisses for several minutes before he pulled away and kissed her stomach before laying his head back down. His attention finally focused on the television. “What the fuck are you watching?”

She was unable to contain her giggles.

I kind of laugh when you cuss at me The aftermath is you touching me

“Oh, is that funny? Are you enjoying yourself?”

“Not at all gorgeous.” His words and his facial expression did not match.

“Then why are you smirking? I’m as serious as a heart attack. If you miss the ceremony where I’m awarded for my work, we’re gonna have some big problems Reyes.” She threatened, not letting that smirk get to her as it usually did. The club pulled him away a lot but some things she just needed him present for.

“Mmhm…how big?” He asked, still joking around.

“Angel!” She admonished, striking out to punch him in the stomach and making him grunt.

“You know I love when you scream my name. Sexy as fuck.” He growled, before playfully tackling her to the bed. She finally laughed as he kissed and nipped at her neck. He pulled back to look down in her eyes. “Hey, come hell or high water Imma be there. I wouldn’t miss it for anything.”

The smile she flashed him was bright enough to light the darkest of nights.

I'm tired of the fast lane I want you to have my last name

Dabbing her eyes with a napkin, Y/N smiled as Angel and EZ shared a heartfelt hug after the best man speech. She knew EZ’s speech would be beautiful and she thanked him for his kind words.

“You’re my sister for real now.” He responded, making her wanna cry again but she gave him a quick kiss on the cheek before Angel pulled her into a side hug.

“First dance time.” He whispered in her ear, taking her hand and leading her out to the dance floor.

“How does it feel to be Y/N Reyes?” Angel asked, his eyes taking her in. She looked so magnificent in her wedding dress. He wanted to rip it off, but also he couldn’t take his eyes off how good she looked in it. If he shed some tears when she walked down that aisle, who could blame him?

“It feels like the most natural thing in the world. I’m so beyond honored to be Mrs. Angel Reyes.” She responded, her eyes filling with happy tears but she refused to let them fall. She just felt so overwhelmed with happiness. Even though he’d long gotten rid of the jacket, she loved that he actually wore a suit. He hardly ever wore one and it was a damn shame. He looked so delicious she couldn’t wait for them to get back home.

Y/N found herself really taking the moment in. Their family and friends watched them with huge smiles on their faces. She couldn’t keep her eyes off Angel for long as he held her in his arms, his hands always making her feel safe. This was her life and he was her future.

Her eyes twinkled as she asked him, “Ready for forever?”

Come close to me, baby (Yeah, love) Let your love hold you (Let me hold you tonight, babe) I know this world is crazy (It gets crazy, but I'll be right here) What's it without you? (We gon' make it, I love you, I love you, I love you)

#angel reyes #angel reyes x black!reader #black!reader #plus size reader #angel reyes x black!plus size!reader #hhgbyebruh fics #i know what you're thinking you're on my mind

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livebloggingmydescentintomadness · 2 years

Note

An ex that ghosted me (long distance) reached out to me when someone he knew passed away. Not necessarily that close but still friends. I didnt know much about him but I felt horrible but I had already gone 4 months without speaking to him and I felt shitty for not replying, am I a bad person? Who doesn't say something to someone that just lost someone? But I was trying to keep sane cause how is he asking for comfort when he left me. Idk if what I did was the wrong move.. Am I a bad person?

honey, you are not remotely a bad person. this guy GHOSTED you; that means he forfeits the right to your emotional support. of course it's sad that this person died, but if they weren't even that close...?

to be quite honest, this sounds like a manipulative attempt to weasel his way back into your life without any consequences for the fact that he just plain ditched you for four straight months. like, "you can't be mad at me, my friend died 🥺"

you seem like a really kind, genuine person, but you've gotta be on guard for people using your kind nature against you. people will 100% manipulate your sincerity to make you overlook or tolerate bad behavior that they should be held accountable for. take a minute to reverse your positions and imagine if you would feel entitled to your ex's time and support after ghosting him, without even apologizing. probably not, right?

if you want to confront this guy, you have every right to do so. it is not being a bad person to say, "i'm sorry that your friend died, but you don't get to just start talking to me again like nothing happened. you hurt me and now you have to deal with the consequences of that."

that's not being unkind. you know what that is? self-respect.

and if you think getting re-involved with this guy is just going to hurt more and negatively affect your mental health, you are 100% within your rights to just block his ass and not say anything. he has other people he can lean on for support in his grief. if he doesn't even have the decency to apologize, why should you let him back in your life?

you're not a bad person, dear. this guy is preying on the fact that you are a good person. don't let him.

#advice #anonymous #ask

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axwalker · 3 years

Text

Creep 2: I don’t care if it hurts

HIGH SCHOOL AU

Pairing: Drake Walker x MC (Lexie O’Brien) Book TRR

MASTERLIST HERE

Synopsis: Drake and Lexie are star-crossed lovers. Her father hates him and forces Lexie to stop any contact with Drake. Lost and heartbroken, he “bullies” her for two years until he discovers the truth of Lexie’s behavior.

A/N 1 This came up to me after I got an ask from @nestledonthaveone to write a fic based on the song CREEP.

I used to hear this song when I was a teenager, so when I read this ask, I immediately wanted to write something angsty but situated in high school.

A/N 2: Because they’re younger than usual, I decided to change my FC.

Words: 4,110

WARNINGS: Parental abuse, domestic violence, toxic love.

THIS IS NOT YOUR USUAL MARSHMALLOW DRAKE. He was abandoned as a boy, he’s tortured and he doesn’t know how to express his love. His behavior is not excusable.

This is a dark love story. If you’re not comfortable with it, PLEASE do not read it.

ALL MY FICS ARE 18+

TAGS ON THE COMMENTS

As this is darker than usual; I’m only tagging the people who commented in the previous chapter. If you want to get on or off the list for this fic, please do not hesitate to ask!!

DRAKE

Even if she never looks at me or speaks to me again, she’s mine. Even if I’ve been a horrible jerk to her for two years and she pales every time I pull into the parking lot on my motorcycle, she is mine. Just seeing her with him enrages me, so I walk straight toward my usual seat, directly behind Lexie, and slam my textbook down onto the desk.

Startled, Rys looks up at me, “Hey, Walker. What’s up?”

It’s not the first time he tries to make a move on Lexie. Last time –two years ago, we almost killed each other. Pretty boy might be an entitled ass, but he knows how to fight. Maybe he thinks Lexie is game again after all this time. He couldn’t be more wrong.

“Don’t you have a class this period?” I ask him. Liam cocks his left eyebrow, adjusting the straps of his backpack.

“I fail to see why that concerns you, Creep.”

My smile is murderous. “Get the fuck out of here before I break your face, pretty boy.”

I think he has a death wish because he looks at Lexie when he talks, “See you after class, Alexis, when your watchdog will be busy mowing my lawn.” Finally, he just shakes his head and gets out of the classroom. I resume my daily routine. Staring at the back of Lexie’s head, tracing the curve of her perfect neck, my cock getting hard over her perfect cherry scent.

“So that’s what you like,” I say, leaning forward to speak an inch from her ears. “You like them with blond hair and pink polo shirts. Prospects for Cambridge or shit. A huge trust fund. Don’t you? A brat like you needs someone who can spoil her. I bet you’d introduce him to daddy, wouldn’t you?”

She doesn’t respond. She never does. Her eyes stay stubbornly on the front of the class where the teacher has started writing today’s lesson on the board—my hands fist in desperation. I’m dying for her to talk to me. To look at me. Anything. “Too bad, Lexie. I’ll scare every single one of those fucking entitled boys off. You’re going to sit alone in your house on prom night, crying into your designer sheets like a baby. And I’m going to enjoy it.”

The only sign that she hears me at all is the quickening rise and fall of her shoulders. Even that tiny display that I’ve upset her is agonizing, floods me with self-loathing, but I can never stop. She ripped out my fucking heart, and I can’t deal with the consequences of that alone. I can’t let her go. I’ll never let her go. This toxic feeling is the only thing left between us. My hands shake with the urge to take her in my arms, to stop the trembling I caused. To protect her from everything. Even myself. I’d love to move my fingers up into the silky, brown hair that reaches the middle of her graceful neck. I don’t have a lot of money; most of the cash I earn as a handyman goes to food and fixing my dad’s cabin, but I’d give every last cent for her to turn and lock those soft brown eyes on me, just one last time. Sometimes when I jerk off, all it takes is fantasizing about Lexie looking at me, giving me one of those shy smiles, and I lose it. One stroke. Maybe two. Done. I can’t breathe without having her close. And I can’t breathe with her close. It’s a strange condition, this obsession, but she’s an addiction that I just can’t give up.

How could I? She’s intelligent, strong, and so damned gorgeous. Once upon a time, I thought she had a good heart too. But that was before she broke my pathetic heart only because I’m poor. I’ve been hurting since then, and I need her to hurt too. To know what it feels.

“Do you actually think that dumb rich boy would be a good choice for your first time, Lexie?” I grip my desk so tight it nearly breaks down, just thinking about her being kissed –touched by someone else. “At least that’s one thing us poor motherfuckers have going for us. We know how to fuck. If you went out with Rys for a while, you’d eventually give in and come slumming it one night, wouldn’t you? Knock on my rundown cabin door, begging me to fuck you as we both know you’d like.”

A pretty blush is starting to climb her neck. I have to take a deep breath to keep from kiss her pink cheeks. But I think if I got to touch her skin, my wall of bullshit would crumble. I’ve only fucked one girl. Since seeing Lexie for the first time freshman year, there’s been no one but her. I want no one else. She owns my cock as sure as she owns my heart. How easily she’s forgotten about both leaving me in agony.

“Stop,” she breathes. I freeze. Did she just speak to me? It’s the first time in two years that she’s even remotely acknowledged my existence.

“Lexie,” I managed to say. I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry. That’s all it took. One pleading word out of her mouth, and I’m done.

“Just stop,” she says again, turning her head slightly. “Please.”

I fall back in my chair, my heart thundering on my chest. If we weren’t in the middle of class, if I didn’t feel like a monster, I would pull her into my arms right now. I’d hug her until she stopped struggling, then beg her to hit me, bruise me, make me pay for every shitty thing I’ve ever said to her. But before long, the class is over, and she’s leaving the classroom to get out of here. To put distance between us as quickly as possible—and I have no choice but to watch her because I feel physically ill. Still, I manage to get out into the student-packed hallway, my plan to apologize for being crude and a jerk and torturing her for so long.

My head is telling me not to apologize, though. It’s telling me she deserved it for being such a snob, for breaking me, for valuing money and status like everyone else. My damned heart is telling an entirely different story. It’s insisting there is an explanation for her behavior. Am I going to apologize or not? The decision is taken out of my hands when Lexie opens her locker, and the little gift I left before class falls down. It’s a picture I cut out from our last yearbook. In the photo is a gorgeous smiling Lexie above the caption Most Likely to Succeed. Except I’ve crossed out the caption and added my own. Most Likely to Be a Trophy Wife. Watching her read it, I almost get sick right there in the hallway. Usually, she’s perfectly composed, not betraying a trace of emotion where I’m concerned—a real Ice queen. I’ve always thought she honestly didn’t care. Today, though… she’s not pulling it off. Something is not okay with her, and I don’t like it. She has to bite down on her bottom lip to stop it from quivering as she puts the photo back into her locker, out of sight, her bright eyes finding me briefly, massacring me where I stand. Betraying with one single look how much she has been affected by my actions. Christ. She hasn’t been indifferent at all.

Before I can react, before I can call her name, she’s gone, vanished into the crowd of wild students excited to be leaving for the day. And I know what I have to do. I have to see her. To apologize. To get an explanation for everything. Tonight. I’ll return to her house for the first time in two years.

LEXIE

I’ve known this was coming all day. Sitting on the couch in my living room, trying to make myself as small as possible, I watch my father pace. He rants, gesticulating noisily. This isn’t new, my father’s rage threatening me. But it’s going to be worse than usual. Business has declined for him and it’s put his temper on a trigger. Dad’s new wife, Nancy, hates to be on a budget, and she’s been spending his money like crazy all over Paris --where she’s now. When dad gets home from the office, he’s rarely in anything but a horrible mood. A tornado eating up everything in its path. Completely terrifying. At least dad’s temper makes me forget what Drake told me today, the ugly words he said to me, the boiling anger in his eyes when he looks at me.

“Are you even listening?” The slap across the face comes as a shock because I’d momentarily disappeared into my thoughts, but the sting quickly brings me back to reality.

“Yes, sir,” I say, my ears ringing. “I’m listening.”

“This C on your algebra test is going to drag your whole average down.” He’s waving the test in my face. “What a disappointment you are, Alexis. Your teacher shared my disgust.” I nod solemnly, but I’m listening for the rain outside. “I guess you’re your daughter’s mother after all. A poor Mexican girl who could barely count.” It’s not true. My mom learned English and Greek by herself, and she was a great Spanish teacher in Portavira, but my father would rather die than acknowledge how smart she was.

“Don’t talk like that about her,” I retort.

My father snorts. “I beg your pardon?” He takes a step towards me, and I can see the threat in his eyes.

“I’m sorry.” I hate to be such a coward, but I know what he can do to me.” I’ll do extra credit. Something to bring my grade back up to an A.” I wet my lips. “Even if I can’t manage to raise the grade, it’s not going to show up on the college transcripts I sent off with my applications.” That’s the reason I let my focus slip a little in algebra. The finish line is in sight for everyone, and we’re just waiting to find out where we’ll be accepted for college. It’s a wonder I’ve been able to maintain my focus this long in any class, considering Walker sits behind me in every period, brooding making me feel … something. At the reminder of him, I want to close my eyes and dream about him. I replay that night in my garden when he kissed me two years ago, so tenderly and passionately, when he spoke to me so sweetly and honestly before he became the second villain in my story. Someone I dread, as much as I crave the sight of him.

At least that’s one thing us poor motherfuckers have going for us. We know how to fuck. If you went out with that punk for a while, you’d eventually give in and come slumming it one night, wouldn’t you? Knock on my trailer door, begging me to ride you right.

Should I be ashamed of the way my body reacted to those words? I grew uncomfortably damp in the hard plastic chair, the center of my body clenching, seeming to beat like a heart. His breath on my neck made me shiver, head to toe. Even the way he scared off Liam Rys did something to me. Aroused me. Deeply. It got so bad that I broke the rules and asked him to stop. I can still hear him saying my name in that tortured way after. That shocked, uneven sound. Lexie. And whether I’m ashamed of myself for it or not, I know I’ll think of it when I touch myself tonight. His voice, his hands, his eyes obsess me.

“College?” My father snorts, tearing the test in half. “You’re not going to college.”

This grabs my attention. A horrible feeling is making me cold. “I’m…what? What do you mean? I applied to nine different schools. I have a four-point five GPA.”

For the first time, I notice his red face is about more than just rage. There’s…humiliation. I’ve never seen him display that emotion.

“None of the American colleges that accepted you offered scholarships.”

“I’ve been accepted?” I gasp, sitting forward, heart pounding in my chest. “Where? I didn’t see the letters—”

“All the mail in this house goes through me, Alexis. I read them. And you failed to get academic scholarships. You failed. Not that I’m surprised.”

I don’t point out that his refusal to let me participate in any extracurricular activities is more than likely to blame for that. I’m too worried about what he’s saying, what this means. The blood is draining from my head, making the room spin around me.

“Okay, I’m sorry about that. I’m sorry. But…we have money. We can pay tuition, can’t we? Or colleges in Cordonia are almost for free. I can go to any of them; I don’t have to go to NYU.” I have to get out of here. I have to get out of here. This is my way out. College is the escape route. I counted on going back to New York, but I can stay here and go to college in Cordonia City.

“Listen to you, so quick to spend my hard-earned money—spoiled brat. And of course, you can’t go to college in Cordonia. What for? To end up being a schoolteacher like your mom? A housewife as Nancy?” He laughs bitterly. “No, you’ll stay here, and I’ll help you find someone suitable to marry.”

I shake my head. “There’s financial aid, then. Loans or I can get a job and go to college in Portavira…”

“You want to leave, just like her, don’t you? You’re all the same.”

I don’t even flinch when he yanks me to my feet, shoving me into the wall. In fact, for the first time, I took him right into his eyes. And I can see the violence burning on them has nothing to do with me. It never had anything to do with how I behave, my choices, how hard I worked in school. How welcome I made Nancy feel or cooked a roast. It’s about him and his self-loathing. It’s his sickness. Not mine. I can also see that he was never going to send me to college. Because he wouldn’t be able to control me from a distance or stop me from sharing what I’ve been subjected to since my mother died. Not like he does now. He wasn’t physically abusive all the time. Especially not when his new wife is around. But she traveled often, and then he’d push me. Shove me. Slapped me several times. I’ll graduate at the top of my class for nothing. He knew I would all along.

That’s when I realize I’m free. I don’t have money, but college is free in Cordonia. I can work, save a little and go to college in one or two years. I’ll be a writer; it’ll just take more time than I thought. “Go to hell,” I whisper.

He steps back, giving me the momentary satisfaction of his shock. “What did you say?”

Liberated, I scream it this time. “Go to hell!” From the moment I sat down to have this conversation, I knew tonight would be worse than usual, but I’ve just bought myself a ticket to hell. Usually, I can retreat to the untouchable place inside of me as he unleashes his rage, but not tonight. He doesn’t stop at one or two slaps. He punches and kicks, and I’m present for every punch and kick. Every yelled insult. Finally, I start to get scared. I’m crawling across the carpet on my hands and knees, searching for a weapon I can use in my defense when I glance out the window and see Drake staring back at me, his face a mask of horror.

Drake

What I’m seeing just isn’t possible. It can’t be real. My head won’t accept it. Not until her terror-filled eyes meet mine through the window and the truth pounds on my chest, leaves no doubt that this is real life. Lexie’s father is beating her. Her mouth is bloody, one of her eyes beginning to swell, arms and legs visibly weakened. I can barely fucking process it before my body is springing into action, desperate to protect her. To put a stop to the worst thing I have ever seen. What the fuck. Scorching hot rage takes over. I kick in the front door and throw myself between Lexie and her father. His fist is raised, but it pauses when he sees me, his momentary confusion giving me the time I need to knock him out cold. It only takes one right uppercut from someone his own size, and he goes down, his blank, glassy eyes staring at nothing, mouth opened. It’s not satisfying enough.

Nothing will ever be satisfying enough. I want to kill him, destroy him, but my Lexie is struggling for breath behind me, and she’s all I can think about. Turning, I approach her, my heart threatening to jump off my chest. As gently as I can, I catalog all of the cuts and purpling skin. No. No. Who could do this to her? Who could lay a finger on her in anything but reverence? Get her out of here. Calling her name, I reach down to pick her up, but she flinches and hurries back, bringing her body up against the wall.

“Don’t touch me!” Those words filled with fear rip the soul clean out of my body. My hands drop limply to my sides and two years come rushing back, hitting me in the chest like a hammer. Every word, every action. Everything I did to make her life harder when this is what she’s been dealing with at home? Fuck me.

“Lexie…” My voice is as kind as I can. I feel broken. “I’m sorry. I came here to apologize. For everything.”

She puffs a humorless laugh, testing her cut lip with the tip of her tongue. “Bet you weren’t expecting to see this.”

“If I knew this was happening, I would have been here a long time ago. I would have stopped it. I swear Lex.”

Her expression can only be described as stunned. Maybe even a little pissed. “You are not my savior, Drake. You are my enemy. You’ve been for two years, and I want nothing else from you now.”

“I am not your enemy.” Those words barely make it out of me, my chest hurts so fucking bad. “Don’t say that.”

Unsteadily, she uses the wall to try and stand. I try to help her, but she recoils, and it’s a dagger straight into the center of my throat. Nothing less than I deserve, though, isn’t it? Her distrust of me is entirely my fault. I’ve made her hate me. There has to be some way to fix what I’ve done. Please God, let there be away. But right now, my main concern is her physical safety. Knowing she’s been in danger all along is unbearable. I only decided to come here tonight a few hours ago. What if I didn’t? What if I arrived an hour later? The possibilities are going to haunt me for the rest of my life. From the floor, her father groans, shifting slightly.

“We need to get you out of here,” I say, anxious to get her free of this place. “Now, Lexie. I need to get you somewhere safe.”

She’s standing now. Leaning against the wall and cradling one arm to her stomach, regarding me warily. “How do I know I’m safe with you?” It’s so much worse that her question is honest. Not meant to hurt me. She honestly doesn’t know if I pose a threat. It guts me where I stand.

“You are the safest with me,” I say thickly, cursing myself. Wanting to erase the last two years so badly, my hands shake. “Please believe me. I’d die before hurting you. I’d never, Lexie. I’d never do something like that.”

Her father rolls over onto his back and slurs a few words before losing consciousness again. Still, the sound of the older man’s voice seems to scare Lexie, “I…maybe you can just give me a ride to…a motel maybe?” She pushes off the wall, her step uneven as she walks toward the stairs. “I need some things from my room.”

It’s on the tip of my tongue to tell her we don’t have time, but I’m just grateful she’s trusting me enough to leave with me, so I don’t argue. I just wait until she’s halfway up the stairs, then tie her father’s hands behind his back with my belt in case he wakes up before we leave. I have no problem knocking him out a second time, but Lexie has seen enough violence for one night. Cautiously, I walk up the stairs toward the light coming from a room halfway down the hall. This place is a far cry from my home. It’s elegant and clean, and tasteful, but it lacks any warmth whatsoever. It’s cold, like a museum. Turning the corner into Lexie’s room, it’s time to hate myself all over again. There is nothing on the walls, none of the expensive furnishings. Just four white walls, a bed, and a dresser that doubles as a desk. Several textbooks. She looks back at me over her shoulder as if judging my reaction, and I keep my features impassive, though I’m dying on the inside.

“What can I do?” I ask.

“How long do we have?”

“As long as you need.” It’s physically painful not to pull her into my arms when I’m standing this close, and she’s hurt. Sad. Yet full of more inner strength than I’ve ever witnessed in another human being. I’m lucky just to be in her presence. I fucked up royally. And if she allows me back in, I’ll never do it again. It’s probably, definitely, too much to hope for. Being allowed back in. She doesn’t even look sure about having me in her room. Let alone her heart. I was trying to protect my own heart, but I lost it instead.

“Um…” She closes her eyes to focus, a familiar trait I’ve seen in class countless times. “There is a black bag in the hallway closet. Can you just stuff anything into it from the bathroom that looks useful?”

Ask me to bring you a unicorn. I’ll find a way to do it. “Sure.” We work in silence, Lexie taking things out of drawers and adding them to the bag, which I’ve left open on the floor. I add toiletries from the bathroom, and once it’s zipped, I wait, watching her hesitate in the doorway.

“Lexie?” Conflicted chocolate eyes meet mine.

“I can’t just leave, can I?”

“You’re not safe here, baby,” I say softly, trying to keep the residual rage at bay because it’s the last thing she needs. Not to mention she’s had her fill with negativity from me. No more. “How long…how long?”

She shrugs, the saddest expression in her eyes. “My mom died five years ago. Ever since then, it’s gotten worse and worse. Although I never had a chance to talk to anyone about what happened behind closed doors, you know? I don’t think a person can evolve into a monster. It’s inside him.”

“I don’t know,” I say. “I became one, didn’t I?”

That gives her pause, forms a line between her delicate brows. “Yeah. I guess you’re right.”

She starts to walk past me, stops, standing close enough to fill my nose with cherry. “He told me if I ever spoke to you ever again, he would hurt me. Ruin you, have you evicted. Make sure you never got hired again. I didn’t mean to…hurt you. Or hurt your feelings, if that’s what happened.”

That revelation destroys me, sets me on fire. “Jesus, Lexie. You were protecting me? And I…I tortured you for it?” I twist the neck of my T-shirt, trying to calm down, but it doesn’t work. I’ll never be calm again “I’m so fucking sorry.”

She glances at the doorway, then back at me, eyes closed again in that way that says she’s thinking. “All I want from you now is a ride out of here, okay? And on Monday morning, you’ll stop.” She opens her shining eyes again. “No more bullying, Drake. If you’re really sorry, you’ll do that for me.”

Fuck. I couldn’t say one more single shitty thing to her if my life depended on it. Put me at gunpoint, and I’d rather get shot at than torture this girl for one more second. But I’m highly, painfully aware that with an end to the bullying comes an end to the possessiveness. No more scaring off guys who show interest in her. No more getting close enough in class to count the hairs on her head, to smell her sweet fragrance. And to tell the truth, I’m pretty fucking worried I don’t know how to give those things up completely. I don’t think I can physically do it. This addiction with Lexie isn’t something I can cut off. A leg would be easier to sever. But my hesitation is causing her eyes to worry. If I don’t agree to, essentially, let her go… she’s not going anywhere with me. And that means her safety won’t be guaranteed. I need it to be. More than anything.

“No more bullying,” I say, finally. A moment later, I follow her out of the room and down the stairs, trying desperately to count the hairs on her head before I no longer have the chance.

#tw domestic violence #toxic relationship #tw bullying

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