#gender is soup

[sciderman]

(Idk if someone asked this already) since we’re on the topic of gender

sci what is gender to you and how do you see it in you and how you express it in your art?? (Just a young queer artist who wants some light shined upon them 🥺)

i 'unno ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

#gender is soup #sci speaks #i'm so sorry i know you might hope for something profound but... i think when i'm put on the spot like this i can't say anything really #i think whatever i am is definitely pervasive in everything i write #but like.. gender means something different to wade than it does for peter. #just like it'll be different for everybody. we make different associations based on our experiences and our trauma. #like.. wade associates femininity with love. because of his mother. associates masculinity with violence. because of his father. #peter associates masculinity with responsibility. because of uncle ben. associates femininity with confidence. because of aunt may. #i think there's all kinds of reasons why we choose to present the way we do. and what gender means to us. #just like we'll associate a colour with something. or a smell with a memory. it's complicated. #i don't think i'm some kind of expert on gender things but... i just find it interesting to explore. the psychology of it. #i don't think it's supernatural. it doesn't come from nowhere. but it should be a playground. #i don't think anyone in this world should be restricted to a certain role to play. i want to try all the roles and see how it fits. #see how well i can play them. #maybe because i haven't found one that quite fits. so i want the opportunity to try whatever i can. see what feels right. #i think it would be fun to be a wife. i think it would be fun to be a husband. i think it would be fun to be a firefighter. i think it wo #shrugs. different outfits for every day. different roles to play. #today i'd like to try... #i think it's like kids learning how to be adults by playing pretend. by playing roles. #i'm learning more about myself and other people and fitting into the world by trying on different roles. #kids playing house. you be the mom. i'll be the dad. yadda yadda. #i still feel like a bit of a kid who hasn't figured out how to be an adult yet. so i'm still trying out roles to see what fits.

[theglitchos]

tldr: gender is soup. i don't want a dick. but hypotheticals are interesting to consider?

gender and identity is fucking complex, both mentally and physically i am still v much soup regarding my gender expression (ie, my outward aesthetics such as clothes), and my brain has apparently decided to add physicallity, like, my actual body, into the soup. which, to a degree it has already done, there's a reason i have a compression/binding top. but. at charmed, there was going to be a class on gender fuckery. i don't remember if it got cancelled or if i just ended up not going to it, but it was on my small list of "maybe i'll go to that" and tbh, the major reason i was hesitating on going was i was not sure how comfortable i'd be and what reactions would happen in my brain. six years ago, i was new to the online hypnosis community, and i fell in with someone who took advantage of my naivety and curiosity. someone who i was friendly with at the time advised me of things he'd done to them that they were not ok with and they'd cut contact with him, and were a patient sounding-board as i pulled convo logs and processed that yeah, this guy was an asshole and manipulative. i cut ties with him, and afaik he's not in the hypnosis community at all anymore. (look, i'm moderately competent at using the internet, i have my ways of finding things). but anyways. he's the reason i was v hesitant about going to the gender fuckery class? like. part of pulling logs and going through shit… i found logs of where i had explicitly said i wasn't comfortable doing a thing (essentially a "hypno body swap" with another person he was playing with at the time)… and had been manipulated into doing it anyways. it was one of the key things that made me say fuck this i'm yeeting him. which, yay noobGlitch. but yeah. i've been fairly skittish and avoidant of transformative play since then. not to say i haven't dabbled in some forms of it, but nothing involving gender-specific physicality. until i read spitfire. tldr, spitfire is an incredibly queer polyam fantasy smutty romance by maya kern. one of the core characters is a dragon, who can transform his body into whatever physical form he wishes. and uh. yeah. it's good. and it was the first time i'd ever succumbed to the stereotypical trans person's experience of "transformation as a superpower/magical ability would be neat ngl" and ever since then i've become.. not comfortable. i'm not sure i'd ever be truly comfortable. but more open? to at least occasionally considering the idea of having amab physicality instead of afab. idk. on the one hand, i know i'm probably never going to get top surgery or do t or anything else to physically alter my body in that way. my body is fine, i'm used to it, it looks good and feels right most of the time. at some point i want to get a better binder, but what i have right now is fine. i don't want a dick. but that doesn't mean i'm incapable of imagining what having one might be like? sure, it's difficult since i do not have the experience. and most of the time i don't give a shit/prefer my afab body. afab is comfortable now, i'm used to it. ANYWAYS the main originator point of this ramble is i somehow got involved in a discussion about hypothetical dicks, and someone ended up asking "glitch, if i may ask, and i totally get if this is too personal to answer - if it's not a power/control thing, why the desire for specifically getting your hypothetical dick sucked" and my roundabout answer was basically "pleasure good, if it were purely toppy/control then maybe a strapon or something would be fine. but i would only get off mentally? like, there's no physical there." which they spun off into a tangent on "why sex toys that integrate with the human nervous should exist" that was v cyberpunky

-shrug-

#glitch rambles #gender is soup

[m-for-now]

As someone who is genderfae (microlabel under genderfluid), I have a lot of different experiences with gender.

I just wish someone told me sooner that it won't go like "today I'm a girl" "today I'm an enby" but more like ,,, "today I am a swamp witch" "today I am a feminine victorian vampire boy" "today I am a forest goblin collecting people's stares about my gender expression like shiny rocks on the ground" "today I'm an androgynous pirate lady"

Like,,, sure, are those real genders? I don't fucking now. If a cisgender person asked me what I identify as that day, would I answer like that? No, definitely not.

But to my genderqueer, trans and genderfluid friends; do you get me? I can't be alone with this, right?

#genderfluid #genderfae #gender expression #genderqueer #transgender #nonbinary #queer #questioning my gender yet again #gender crisis #gender #my gender soup has so many flavours you don't understand #i needed to explain to my friend that when i say i want to dress like the cutest victorian inspired goth vampire prince #it's not actually a male gender #like.. you would really think it is #but that is a very nonbiney gender somehow #don't ask me how #or maybe it does count as male? #but the femininest androgynous male you can think of #like cute pretty let me giggle like a little girl kinda feminine #i don't even know if half of these things make sense #“why don't you just say girl or enby” #because moon witch dark cottagecore female isn't the same #as go out in the sun and enjoy the breeze i command a ship androgynous pirate lady female #anyways

[libakarm]

#butterfly soup #butterfly soup 1 #diya butterfly soup #min butterfly soup #diyamin #brianna lei #in love with this game since 2016 btw but finally have a meme to show for it ig even tho i made it years ago #memes #sapphic #wlw #2021 #yes ik min doesnt vibe with gender i dont either but i feel like they'd be chill with referrals like this for a dumb joke #maybe im wrong ofc idk

[uncanny-tranny]

At this point, gender nonconformity is about what the person says their experience is.

If a woman with a beard or a man with lipstick and a mustache says they're gender nonconforming, then they are! If a woman with short hair or a man with long hair says they aren't, they aren't! And that's not even getting into the awesome nonbinary, abinary, genderqueer, intersex, and general genderfuckery that may both be and not be conforming.

So much of what is even considered gender conforming or gender nonconforming is based on a world of exclusion. When we start defining one's conformity with whether they fit into white cishetero perisex standards or not, we play into the idea that there's only a very narrow window of what is considered worthy of time and thought.

#gender nonconformity #gnc #queer #like. for instance a native man who keeps long hair might be considered GNC by white standards but for him it's absolutely not nonconformit #there's an aspect of white supremacy that silences everything else while saying that other culture's silence is indicative of whiteness... #...being 'correct' or 'moral' or 'neutral' #and as somebody who's trans and last i checked white i have my own thoughts from my own experiences #like how i don't consider myself to really be a GNC man. i'm just. man+ #i'm a weird concoction of weird soup that tastes like a man but if it were Wrong #and i just don't see that as not conforming to manhood like it is seperate. i see it as irrevocably linked TO manhood #it is others who have excluded and exiled me from manhood because of *their* understanding of me and how i 'fit in' in cissexism #while i will never ever say i know what it's like to not be white i will say these conversations that PoC have started have been INVALUABLE #i am forever grateful to have been extended the patience and faith to listen in on the experiences of people... #...who are racialized in terms of gender and how they do/don't 'fit in' with often white supremacist views on gender/dynamics #may have made a post like this years back but. eh. arrest me officer i will not back down #i've been more and more 'gnc' as i go into my transition and i don't see it as nonconformity but as an outlet for my masculinity #which is why i'm not insecure about my crafts and creations. because it is coming from a male whether or not it's considered 'manly' #i have little to *no place* in cissexist society so why should i put any stakes into if they ~accept~ me #made this post while jamming out to skyrim's tavern OST (paused my game to write this) #why the HELL does the skyrim tavern music have to go SO HARD. i NEED to slam down BARRELS of mead while listening to this istg #i don't even LIKE honey so i haven't tried mead but. for skyrim i would.

[4e7her]

october writing prompt #4 - “at what cost?”

-

character: floyd leech, twisted wonderland

contains: yandere themes, gn reader

"You know, shrimpy, I could take reeeal good care of ya."

Floyd talks like he's discussing the weather - casual and carefree, that usual drawling tone of his almost making you miss what he says entirely. Before you can say anything, he smirks at you, sharp teeth poking out.

Immediately, any attempt at questioning him dies in your mouth. His eyes are predatory and intelligent, in a way he usually doesn't display. There's something... more to this.

"You're just so squeezable, y'know? I'm sure ya need someone like me around, don'tchya?"

He swings an arm over your shoulder, pulling you into his side as his grin grows. Your dumbfounded look does nothing to deter him - if anything, he looks pleased to have caught you off-guard. That dangerous look of his fades a little, if only barely, replaced by a twisted affection.

"...And at what cost would that be, huh?"

The eel's entire demeanor flips on it's back - he's scowling with furrowed brows, his hold on you just a little bit too tight. If you didn't know better, you'd say that he was offended by the accusation.

"You think that little of me?"

There's an undercurrent to his pouty voice, something that you can't quite put your finger on. You land on somewhere between distraught and heartbroken, but that wouldn't make any sense, would it? Why would Floyd be so wounded by you playing off what was clearly not meant seriously. This was just another one of his jokes to see how you react, you were sure of it.

His expression takes another sudden shift, and you're left fumbling trying to keep up and wrap your head around his behavior.

"Azul is the one that makes the deals, shrimpy, not me." He huffs, pulling away from you only to grab you by the shoulders and make you look directly at him as he seems to... scold you? "You gotta pay more attention to me! Who else is gonna take care of a little shrimp like you, huh?"

The sing-song of his voice is almost enough to distract you from the sharp glint of his teeth and the look in his eyes as he whines and jumps around different topics, never giving you a moment to truly catch up. Or enough time to think about what he might be scheming when he shares a meaningful look with Jade when the two of you pass him in the hallway.

Really, Floyd was just so strange. You didn't think you would ever be able to understand him.

-

[click here to go to masterlist.]

#twisted wonderland #twst #twst wonderland #gender neutral reader #gender neutral post #aether's drabbles #yandere #yandere content #twst x gender neutral reader #october writing challenge #twstober #twst floyd #floyd leech #yandere floyd x reader #yandere floyd leech #floyd leech x reader #twst floyd x reader #honestly i don’t know i woke up an hour and a half ago and my brain is soup #hope y’all like it

[weaponized-kindness]

let's talk about labels

Hanging around the queer part of reddit, I see A LOT of posts that has a variation on the "am I trans/ace/pan/gay/bi...." followed by a message I rarely read, because the answer is always the same.

If this label feels like a good description of your lived experience and feels right, then YES.

And it bothers me a lot, because it shows a fundamental problem with how we perceive labels. Labels are code words used to describe a lived experience. instead of having to explain every time, you use a label. I am gay I am bisexual I am asexual I am aromantic I am non binary I am queer

all those words tell you a story about the person that uses the label. and stories change, and so does labels. A label is not a thing to be permanent or must define your entire existence, it is a word to explain your lived experience up to that point in life.

Gatekeeping labels is therefore not only dumb, but also harmful. YOU DON'T get to write other peoples stories, YOU DON'T get to determine how they experience the world.

NO ONE, and I mean it NO ONE gets to tell you you are not enough of something when talking about your experience. YES, you are asexual enough to be ace, even when you like having sex sometimes. YES you are gender queer enough even when you present yourself according to your assigned gender YES you are trans enough even when you don't transition YES you are bi/pan enough even when you never dated someone out of a certain gender group YES you are

Labels should be a tool that we use to communicate, not a jail cell.

So yeah, if it feels right, you are. No need for further information No questions ask YOU ARE

#gay #bisexual #lesbians #asexual #aromantic #queer #pansexual #homoseuxality #aromantism #asexuality #gender queer #non binary #transgender #transition #queer pride #queerness #lgbtq #lgbtqia #alphabet soup #labels #microlabels #identity #coming out #lgbtq positivity #lgbtq pride #lgbtq+ #lgbtq post #mini rant #be kind

[yourlocalabstraction]

I just wanna say something about the new video /nm

I’ve seen a lot of people assuming various things about Jash’s gender identity just from how he dresses in the dance segment. Like some folk in the cjfs are saying things along the lines of “OH EM GEE HE’S SUCH A GENDERQUEER ICON”, and others are even going as far as calling him a femboy.

I get you all have good intentions and mean this in a positive light, but please, have respect for Mr. Jash. Note that he is an actual fucking guy. Don’t woobify or idolize him to an uncomfortable extent. Also, we need to avoid forcing labels upon him. As a cis guy, his fanbase shouldn’t be shoving him into a certain corner of identity that doesn’t resonate with him, merely because of the way he dresses in a video. Plus, the outfits he’s in aren’t necessarily ‘feminine’. They aren’t gendered! They’re pieces of clothing!! Just because he’s wearing fits that go against masc norms, it isn’t an instant sign that ‘holy shit chonnathan jash gener fluid real’.

Also, this is a huge personal gripe of mine, can we PLEASE NOT CALL HIM A FEMBOY????? I haven’t seen many people do this thankfully, but, do I even have to explain why this ain’t it????? Not only do some trans people consider it a slur, but this is a real, cis, grownass man we’re talking about. As a fanbase, we need to establish and acknowledge that this guy is an actual person with feelings and boundaries.

I’ve just noticed that with a lot of GNC artists/influencers, there’s a lot of pressure from their fans to be labeled as genderqueer just because of how they appear. Please remember that gender presentation is a spectrum, and presentation does NOT equal gender identity !!! Just because a cis man is more fem-presenting than societal standards, it doesn’t instantly make them not cis. The definition of being cis is that you identify with your AAB gender. That’s the only requirement.

Anyways, I honestly hella appreciate that Jash is doing this!! We don’t see GNC cis folk to often, and this guy is just!! So valid man!!!! I am immensely comforted.

Don’t get me wrong, it IS ok to gender envy him (i sure as hell do), and complement his appearance. If you wanna say he’s pretty, go ahead!!!!! Just remember that at the end of the day, no matter whatever you say, just have respect for the guy and don’t be a fuckin weirdo with it!!!!!!!!

#this is probably word soup but i wanted to get it off my chest #QUOTE FROM SOMEONE IN THE CJFS >>>>> #‘’​He looks beautiful and I know that part of the song was to make a point but I hope he feels beautiful looking back at it. #You don’t have to be gender queer to not conform to to gender norms and I think he absolutely slays.’’ #also #yall i love the chonnathan shimmy too but dont let it distract you from the actual point of the song #cj ego #is there a jash tag for ego yet #oh well #chonny jash #cj rambling #psa

[shiftythrifting]

#submission #think bathroom genders #think about the piss you're making while you hydrate #soup soup soup soup SOUP #housewares #uk

[birf]

dabi shampoo challenge even though it’s actually wound wash (this one’s for fellow transmascs <3)

#in my home cooking up gender #dabi #dabi fanart #dabi soup

[caffeinechic]

#good omens #good omens fanart #go fanart #crowley #gender queer crowley does what they like #cc tries to art #pose reference by mellon soup

[theglitchos]

i still don’t know if i want to have a buff gf or be the buff gf

but rn i have a distinct lack of both

#glitch rambles #glitch thoughts #gender things #gender is soup

[skeletons-in-ur-closet]

having a deeper voice and being 6 inches taller would literally cure me

#in the gender soup tonight man

[libertyeveningsun]

Hello, I have just been lurking on the edges of the OFMD fandom for all of season 2 but thought I would make a little contribution to the fandom, since I'm a big Olu x Jim x Archie shipper and I think Zheng should join (there's just no photo of all 4 of them together)

#ofmd #our flag means death #ofmd s2 spoilers #oluwande boodhari #jim jimenez #archie ofmd #poly pirates! #scary mom and himbo are gender neutral #garlic soup

[lurkingteapot]

Hi, how would a non-binary person (me) get around the binary gender rules and vocab in Thai?

Thank on you for your amazing resources!

Hi there!

This is a question I feel like native speakers of Thai should be much more qualified to answer 😅 @recentadultburnout ? @jinitak ? Any takers?

For what it's worth, though: I also consider myself outside the gender binary, and am uncomfortable with some forms of gendered address in languages I'm fluent in, and as such have looked into it a bit. I'm barely conversational, so the things I list here have been sourced from conversations with queer and non-binary Thai acquaintances and a couple of language teachers plus my own observations, which may very well be faulty … so under the cut it goes.

First off: Thai isn't nearly as clearly binarily gendered as many beginner resources indicate. Beginner resources will say, oh, men™ say ผม (/pʰǒm/) and women™ say ฉัน (/tɕʰǎn/), but (as you may have already observed while watching shows or interviews) in reality people (queer or straight, cis or trans) will use several different pronouns for themselves and others depending on who they're talking to, and in what context—perception of gender is only one part of that. Your age, the tone of voice and level of politeness/formality you're affecting, the situation you're in at that moment, all those things affect how you talk about yourself to others, and how others talk about and to you. It's not as cut and dry as English "these are my pronouns" -- partially also because you'd kind of need to go out of your way to gender the person you're talking about in Thai.

One example: people of all genders can and do use ฉัน (/tɕʰǎn/), though I gather it's less commonly used by men these days. Contrary to what most classes will teach, men or people who are read as male may (and do!) use ค่ะ (/kʰâʔ/; often drawn out to ค่าาา (/kʰâː/ with a very drawn-out aaa)) and จ๊ะ (/tɕáʔ/) in affectionate/familiar conversation, and it's not unheard of for men to refer to themselves by their given name, either -- something a lot of teachers will say are "feminine" speech patterns. For women or people who're read as female to use particles such as ครับ (/kʰráp/) or pronouns such as ผม (/pʰǒm/) seems to be less common, though not unheard of, especially when a woman is affecting a brash personality at that moment. All that is to say … for those of us who fall somewhere in between (or outside the binary altogether), there's quite a bit of wiggle room.

Golf Tanwarin (former MP and the director of GMMTV show The Eclipse) uses different particles depending on context – I've watched interviews where they use ครับ (/kʰráp/) exclusively, others where they use both ครับ (/kʰráp/) and ค่ะ (/kʰâʔ/), and in the live spaces they opened when the Eclipse was airing, to my recollection they used ค่ะ (/kʰâʔ/) and จ๊ะ (/tɕáʔ/) pretty much exclusively. Some non-binary Thais use non-standard polite particles -- Silvy Pavida (The Warp Effect, Laws of Attraction) uses งัฟ (/ŋáp/) on their IG posts, for one example.

My personal approach (which, again! may or may not work for you) is that I go with what people expect from my appearance, and switch to other options only once I'd've got to know my conversation partner better. My reasoning for this is that as a language learner, trying to deviate from the expected language use will likely be perceived not as me trying to express my identity, but simply as me being bad at the language -- I feel like I need to attain and display a level of skill with the language that makes clear the uncommon way I use it is intentional, first. This might not be your approach! but it's worked for me so far.

What I'm doing in the meantime: I try to watch content by people who … idk, match the sort of presentation I aspire to, or who I feel kinship with? and try to emulate what they do (keeping in mind that most online content is rather informal); sometimes, when I'm comfortable enough, I will just try things out when I have the chance (though this can have embarrassing results).

tl;dr there's no way around it, but there are several ways to manage it, and you'll find out best by playing around and finding what works for you, personally :)

(also: I'm glad you found the 'learning Thai' link dump helpful <3)

#thai language #learning thai #personal #asked and answered #zimmbiscuit #language soup #gender #my nonsense #yeeting this out there before I second guess myself even more

[gendrsoup]

i need yall to understand that i'm genderfluid in that im sapphic for women, achillean for men, and queer as shit for the bastards in between

#soup talks about gender #no matter who i love it's always gonna be queer as fuck #queer #genderfluid #trans