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monachopsisfamily · 24 minutes ago
God, things aren't getting easier. We have even more people quitting and at this point I'm not sure how we are still open, sure it's more hours but we are having to come in earlier than in the past and it is conflicting with my sleeping schedule. I'm staying so fucking tired, I've got food but not the energy to make myself supper, I went from doing laundry at least once a week to going until almost everything is dirty and I can't even find the energy to put it up, much less trying to consecutively do a chore consistently but mom doesn't seem to understand that it's not that I'm lazy. I fucking hate living like this, I fucking hate not having the energy to enjoy playing video games, taking better care of myself, and being more productive around the house; at least I'm still doing my all at work to remain employed, making sure I pay rent and my phone bill, and buying my own food.
Cut me some slack, you have your own mental issues and do just as much shit wrong as me. You are responsible for half of my issues, do you think I like living in a place that we have to mask our issues to seem ok because between our childhood and now I don't feel safe or entitled to feel mad or upset, and your reaction and lack of interest in us as a system I don't feel safe not having them mask as me; on top of that I'm constantly checking your mood so that I know when to expect something from you. I'm so goddamned tired I want to cry, I feel hollow, helpless, cause I'm still so far away from being free from your constant presence.
It was a week or so ago our partner system pointed out that I can't relax in any sense at all because I don't feel safe at home to let down my guard, I feel safer at work than I do home. When in therapy calls I always have the worry that she's listening in to it to hear what I say, I don't feel safe to drop my guard during those calls even though I want to, I want to get better.
Mom believes that I'm incapable of living on my own because I have so little energy to do stuff around the house, but it's because I can't give myself the time to rest as I'm constantly listening, watching, gauging everything. Her strange passive-aggressive attitude directed at me today put me in a freeze response to avoid any further attention from her kept me from getting anything before work until it was almost too late and I just ate two fucking hot dogs by themselves. I'm sitting at work after I've clocked out to wait for our partner system to get off because I don't want to go home.
Maybe this is something I've realized in the past and for some reason I keep forgetting, but I don't remember a time when I felt anything more than just another person I live with for mom. There isn't any feeling of familial love, no bond on my end, the only fucking thing I feel when I think about her mortality is that when she does go it's worry of if I'll be able to have found my feet to support myself and the relief that I'll be free to let go of the guard and mask. I feel like a terrible fucking child that I don't care more, that I'll probably have to take care of her or dad (maybe both) when they are too old to take care of themselves and I'm looking at possibly having to work until I'm physically unable and be left on the streets when I can't. I have no retirement plan, no money put back, I've got no good job prospects and I'm in my 30s.
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murphy-kitt · 36 minutes ago
DP Identity Reveal Fic Rec (requested by @deuynndoodles )
(below the cut)
Danny’s His Corpses Pinãta Stuffing
maybe then you’ll see me
Four Words
The Patron Saint Of Liars And Fakes
Missed Opportunities
(Un) Known
Blood & Ectoplasm
friends in low places
it’s in the eyes, they say
The Aftermath
Just Throw That Damn Crown In The Trash
Snow Drift
a truth so sour
This Is Not In Vain
The Phantom Always Rings Twice
it’s not that deep
That Razor’s Edge
Accidentally Calling Your Ghost Hunter “Mom”
you’re bound (but so free)
5 + 1 times Danny Phantom saves the Fenton’s + 1 time they save him
The Apocalypse Comes To Amity Park In The Form Of.. Danny?
And He Was Dead
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ilyriin · an hour ago
haikyuu characters that are non binary
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idk man i'm non binary so these characters are now sorry i dont make the rules 😐👍
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yachi, lev, shirabu, komori, yahaba, makki, kageyama, goshiki
idk just existing tbh
kunimi, suna, sugawara, tendo, takeda idk for some reason idk gives off that vibe, konoha, yamato
not necessarily non binary but just..... doesn't have a gender???
atsumu, hinata, saeko, kenji, bokuto, yukie, kenma, aone
they are just non binary bc there's no other answer
sugawara, yamaguchi, yaku, alisa, akaashi, himekawa
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teriel · an hour ago
Rediscovering your identity sometimes means reclaiming your identity. I share my own reclamation process and also reflect on Father’s day and how my identity has changed around fatherhood. I also share some ideas for how you can reclaim your own identity as part of rediscovering who you are.
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ask-forward · an hour ago
You asking for magic anons, so...
Ganji and Will should be allowed to adopt a dog for a lil bit. As a treat. 5 asks !
Although Ganji’s more of a cat person (and Will’s a dog person), the Doberman breed definitely suits both of their tastes
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ask-the-wolf-idv · an hour ago
It might not be obvious, but his comfort object is the mask he wears. It reminds him of his father, who was the one who gave it to him.
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pessimistic-piscess · an hour ago
anyone else headcanon themselves as nonbinary bc they don’t wanna deal with explaining it to others LOL
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multiplemogai · an hour ago
Mha introjects?
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[image ID: a flag with 4 vertical stripes reflected on each side. The stripes are very dark blue, bright red, sky blue, and yellow. In the center is the Boku no Hero Academia logo. end ID]
Boku no Hero Academia introject flag.
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[image ID: Only for use by traumagenic DID/OSDD systems. end ID]
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janes-vocaworld · 2 hours ago
Otomachi Una is a DID system :)
Una (represented by TalkEX voicebank) is the host. She takes care of the body the most.
Spicy (represented by Spicy voicebank) is the protector. She comes off a bit strong but just wants to take care of her headmates.
Sugar (represented by Sugar voicebank) is the trauma holder. She talks about herself in the third person and is kinda shy.
Elsie (a shy eight-year-old version of Elsa, from Frozen) is a little and a fictive. She is shy and quiet, and closest with Unagi.
Unagi (who takes a form similar to Ottoman Bō’s but is NOT Ottoman Bō) is the gatekeeper and uses eel/eelself pronouns. Eel doesn’t talk much with anybody in the system, but is protective over Elsie.
Una and Spicy tend to front an equal amount.
Sugar doesn’t front much, and when she does it’s usually just to hang out with Rana or Petit.
Spicy and Sugar are typically co-con during performances/Vocaloid stuff.
Elsie rarely fronts, since she’s eight years old and gets age dysphoria.
Unagi almost never fronts. Sometimes eel’s co-con with Elsie, but otherwise eel is never fronting.
They call themself the Eel System.
(note: I do not have DID. I have been doing a lot of research in order to try and figure out how to portray these people properly, since I really wanna roll with this headcanon, but I most likely will get facts wrong. Please correct me if so.)
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kenshinscp · 2 hours ago
miau falta de identidad #kenshinscp #cats #pets #human #hooman #reality #identity #real #sunday #gatos #identidad #robot #loki #humano #real #domingo #adoptdontshop #adoptanocompres
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askgardenerwoods · 2 hours ago
Miss Woods, how much do you remember about your father...? It’s perfectly fine if you don’t want to talk about such a sensitive subject of course.
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"And- maybe it was because she was small...
But.. up there, Emma swears she saw the whole world beneath her!"
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