#but to do so. they need help - but they arent getting that help

[svt-incognito]

hey, may i request something? jeonghan. with. bdsm exhibitionism. LIKE. REALLY. THAT. MAN. WILL. LET. PEOPLE. SEE. HOW. GOOD. HE. IS.

🐇 .ᐟ.ᐟ the show

incognito thot : jeonghan invites his friends for your little show

tw : exhibitionism, voyeurism, light bdsm, light bondage + discipline,, shoe riding, thigh riding, edging, use of toys, name-calling (sir, whore, slut), sharing (?), slight jihoon, jun and hao x reader, (everyone involved are completely consenting adults)

The air was cold on your skin. You were completely naked, legs crossed and cheeks red as you sat like that in front of 12 pairs of eyes of men who weren’t your boyfriend. They were your boyfriend's friends, actually, here to watch the show your boyfriend had set up for you. They were dressed up in black and white suits and formal attire, their faces covered under masquerade masks, their sparkling champagne held in fragile glasses as they murmured around about you, sitting on chairs arranged around the bed you were on. 

Your boyfriend, who positioned himself behind you, was done tying your hands behind your back, as he gently put his hands over your shoulder and gave you a light comforting squeeze as he murmured by your ear, “green for keep going, yellow for pause and red for stop. You remember the safeword, right?”

You nodded and he smiled, kissing your shoulder blade before turning to his audience. “Alright everyone, lets go over the rules a last time. No clicking of photos or videos. No one removes their masks – it ruins the aesthetics, you know. No one touches my girl, unless i say so. You can look and comment and suggest, but only i tell her what to do. No one can jerk off here, unless i allow. If she says red, everything stops and everyone gets out. If anyone dares break any rule or make my girl uncomfortable, they see themselves out. We clear?”

The crowd agrees and jeonghan smiles again. He looks at you once again, “baby, whats the colour?”

“Green, sir.” 

“Good girl,” jeonghan taps on your knees, prying your legs open, displaying your cunt to everyone. The boys comment around, looking at your core, calling it beautiful names, making you shy and horny. Jeonghan glides his hands over your thighs, making you shiver, his cold fingers brushing lightly over your sensitive inner thighs. His fingers ghosting over your pussy, hovering but not quite touching you. 

seungcheol laughed at the way your arousal drips down, “shit, you haven’t even been touched yet but you are still leaking like a faucet.”

You don’t need to look at your boyfriend’s face to know he has a proud smirk painted on his face. Your breath halters when jeonghan finally touches you, fondling around your pussy and spreading your inner labia as if to show his friends the amazing cunt he owns. He doesn’t touch your clit, not yet. He hums over your shoulder, kissing the crook of your neck, satisfied with the soft noises you make from his touch. “Such a pretty baby, obedient and ready to do anything for me, arent you? Its time to make use of your favorite toy, yeah?”

Jeonghan took out a vibrator bong from the box of toys he had prepared for the night, and turned it on on the lowest setting, pressing it directly against your cunt. You let out a whimper as jeonghan gradually increased the spead of the vibrato, holding it firmly against your clitoral hood. When you looked at your audience, you accidentally locked eyes with joshua – you could tell it was him from how recognisable his beautiful eyes were even under his mask. There was a smug smile on his face as he stared you down, sipping his champagne as jeonghan drove you to the edge. 

You were close already, the shame of being watched like this turning you on more than you thought it would. But if you knew jeonghan at all, you knew your first orgasm wasn't gonna come so easily. So as unsurprising as it was for you when he took the vibrator off your pussy as soon as he felt your thighs shake, you couldn't help the whine that left your lips.

Jeonghan's friends laughed at your neediness. Jeonghan chuckled too, “baby, aren't you making too much noise? That's what bad girls do.”

Tears straining your eyes, you looked back at your boyfriend, your lips quivering, “m’ sorry.”

“Hm, can't hear you yet,” Jeonghan mused fondling with your breasts, holding the weight of them in his palms and pinching your nipples till you yelped.

“Aah, i said I'm s-sorry, jeonghan.”

Jeonghan raised his eyebrows, “jeonghan? You're gonna call me by my name? Where's sir?”

Your eyes widen as you shake your head, “i-it just slipped my tongue, m’ sorr-”

“Tch, tch, too late now, baby. You embarrassed me in front of my friends, just after i told them how well behaved my little whore is. Bad girls get punishment now, don't they?” Jeonghan easily manhandled you to lie on his lap, face down, ass up. He caressed your ass almost tenderly as he pushed your face into the sheets. “You will count, ‘kay?”

You nod, and jeonghan immediately lands his first smack on your round left cheek. “O-one.”

Then came another. And another. Alternating between your cheeks, jeonghan kept spanking you, rubbing the site redness every now and then. 

“Seven.”

Smack.

“Eight.”

Smack.

“Nine.”

Smack.

“Ten.”

“Her ass is so beautiful and red,” someone from the crowd commented aloud, but you couldn't recognise whose voice it was.

Jeonghan helped you sit back up right as your butt stung. “Now, lets continue.”

What followed next was jeonghan using all of his favourite toys on you, one after the other, edging you everytime you were close. From vibrators to dildos to vibrating dildos and anal beads, he used all of the toys he had saved for the night on you, leaving you a begging, crying mess, needy for a release. He loved how his friends complimented you, called out for how obedient and well-trained you were. You made him proud.

“S-sir, please,” you begged, looking at your boyfriend with teary puppy eyes.

“Hm? Please what, whore?”

“N-need to cum.”

“Already? But my dick isn’t hard enough to feed you yet. How ‘bout you go around and please the crowd, yeah?” jeonghan said with fake sympathy and took a look around the room for the man with the cleanest shoe, smirking when minghao’s polished cleaned black leather shoe caught his eyes, “baby, won’t you love fucking hao’s shoe?”

You eyes, along with several others’ from the room, widened. You had ridden jeonghan’s shoe before – the night after one of his award show performance when you couldn’t stop complimenting his attire – and you know you loved it. Which is why it surprised you how easily he would let minghao have that same pleasure. Then again, jeonghan was a man who loved showing you off, give others the taste of what they could never have.

You stood from the bed on shaky legs and walked to minghao who sat on one side, his smug smile very recognisable. He was sitting on the chair with his legs crossed and did not do anything about his position to make it easier for you, just pointed the tip of his shoe upwards as you got on your knees. You held his ankle to guide his feet to your cunt, moaning at the sensation when the cold leather touched your swollen clitoris. You held onto his knees for support and ground against his shoe. You gasped softly when minghao thrust his shoe upwards, making it grind against your entrance, the texture of his shoe feeling good against your core. Minghao smirked to himself, petting your hair as he drank his bubbly wine. You came surprisingly fast, glistening the once clean and spotless shoe with your juices. 

“You’re such a good slut, you know,” minghao remarked lovingly.

You hadn’t come down from your first high when jeonghan called out to you, “you can ride over soonyoung’s thighs next, baby.”

You dumbly mumbled a huh? before walking upto soonyoung and straddling his right thigh without so much as thinking. You loosely wrapped your arms around his neck for support as you began rubbing your pussy against soonyoung’s expensive linen trousers, crying at the sensitivity. Soonyoung excitedly grabbed your hips, guiding them in circular motion, only to be scolded by jeonghan.

“Soonyoung, what did i say about touching?”

“B-but i thought– since i–”

“Nope, no buts. I’ll let you stay, but you just lost your privilege,” jeonghan said, equally smug and annoyed, “y/n, off him. Go to jihoon instead, ride his thigh like a good girl and i’ll let you cum twice before i fuck you.”

You nodded, getting off the man who whined at his loss and approached his other friend. Jihoon grinned, spreading his legs invitingly as you took a place on his thigh. If anything, jihoon knew he was smarter and more composed than soonyoung, determined to make you cum on him. You held onto jihoon’s strong shoulders, your sensitive nub gliding over his clothed thigh. His legs were as strong and muscular as they looked and felt great on your pussy.

Jihoon could see jeonghan smile in satisfaction when jihoon rocked his legs to give you additional friction.

“Jihoon, use your fingers. I want to see you make her squirt.”

“Sure,” jihoon said, wasting no time in sliding his hand between your legs and plugging your cunt with his middle and ring finger, finding it stretched enough from all the toys earlier. He curled them, watching you squirm on his lap as he searched for your sweet g-spot. He felt the spongy area, making you moan at how efficiently and quickly he did so. He rubbed over that area, thrusting his fingers in and out at a quickened pace, determined to make you leak now that he was given the task to do so. 

“Jun, you just want to grab her tits, dont you,” jeonghan said, pulling your attention to look at the boy beside you who just got caught ogling at your boobs. “Go ahead, touch them up. No mouth.”

Junhui excitedly leaned closer, taking hold of your boobs and sighing at how soft and good they felt in his palms. He flickered your nipples, making you moan whorishly, combined with jihoon’s fast fingers. Junhui stood up and stood behind you, taking both your tits in each of his hands and playing with them to his hearts content – kneading, palming, pinching your nipples, everything he’d been dreaming on since the moment he laid his eyes on them when you stepped out of your lingerie at the start of the evening. Jihoon used your distraction to suddenly attack your clitoris with his thumb, pressing and rubbing the hood in a circular motion. You cried a whimper, squeezing jihoon’s shoulders for support as you came a second time, squirting all over his clothes and making them wet. Jihoon might have ruined one of his most expensive suits but it was worth it. 

“Aw, my little slut did so well,” jeonghan cooed, beckoning you over. You walked to him and fell right into his arms, sloppily kissing him as he wiped away your tears. “Had fun yet baby? Well, its my turn to have fun now. My dick is hard and throbbing and i’m gonna fuck you really hard, yeah?”

You nodded as jeonghan instructed you to get down on all fours – of course, since doggy was his favorite positon. He whipped his dick out of his pants finally, lingering and teasing you by not entering you yet. He glided his dick between your slick cunt and stretched asshole, pretending to make a choice. He plunges into your pussy with no warning, hitting deep close to your cervix. You whined as he did it again, and again and again, ramming into your pussy without a hint of mercy.

You whimpered, your head falling down as you feel jeonghan’s dick up in your throat. But jeonghan didnt want that. He grabbed a handful of your hair and pulled your head up so it was facing your audience, “i want them to see your fucked up pretty face, doll. Want them to see how good i fuck you.” 

Your moans dont stop as jeonghan’s pace become more brutal, hitting you fast and hard on where you need it the most, fucking you like a rabbit in heat. You felt your third orgasm building and you would cum soon without even being touched. You hear Jeonghan curse under his breath and feel him come close to his own orgasm. You helped both of you by clenching around his dick with all the strenth you have left in your body. Soon enough you reach the edge, moaning as you get fucked through your high. Jeonghan came soon after, his warm semen creaming your insides. 

Jeonghan takes a look around the room, and predictably, most faces were satisfied, some jealous and one particular face fucked out – he’s sure mingyu had cummed in his pants comepletely untouched.

“Well everyone, thank you for being such a lovely audience. You can get out now though, the show is over.” jeonghan tells his friends, exiting your entrance. Nobody argues going out, rather, discussing aloud their favorite bit of the show. 

You giggle lazily as jeonghan hugs you and kisses the top of your head, feeling the tiredness wash over you. “Enjoyed, baby?”

“M-hm, t’was so good.” 

Jeonghan chuckled. “Take a nap, i’ll clean you up. Night’s pretty young, and i am sure our guests staying over for the night ould love hearing your loud moans as we course through round three and four.”

#svt #svt x reader #svt smut #seventeen smut #seventeen x reader #jeonghan #yoon jeonghan #jeonghan smut #jeonghan x reader #jihoon x reader #the8 x reader #woozi x reader #jun x reader #seventeen

[angy-grrr]

I'm glad that someone pointed out that Izuku is definitely feeling really lost rn. And also that Ochako was also not the only person with the kind of goal he had, and that there's still quite a lot of stuff to be shown.

im surprised most ppl arent talking about it! But well, many are focus on Shigaraki or just disliking the manga, sooo....

And yeah, even tho he didn't talk about it directly with him, he knew Shoto's intentions -the difference is that theres a familial connexion between him and Dabi, so Ochako's link to Himiko looked more similar to his and Shigaraki (even tho we learn there are huge differences). I'm curious to see if they do end up discussing it, and if she'll be honest about her closeness with her -how they had mutual feelings, etc-, or if Hori will decide to keep them more separated. What I mean by this is, instead of repeating the cliff scene, show us what's going on with togachako without Izuku being involved.

I'm guessing this is the route for Shoto and Dabi, and the rest of the Todoroki family -developing their arcs outside of Izuku, and him being the one who needs to express himself out loud, or something similar.

Right now, the questions to cover:

Izuku's feelings -including the taboo ones, like rudeness, rage and selfishness-; is he going to express them openly? Will someone assign him a therapist? Is the new character going to make him confront what he hides?

The new character -who is this person? What is going to happen? Personally, I expect this to be kind of a test. Are they going to hide him and pretend people like him dont exist? Or are they going to help? Could there be people who want to change things, and people who prefer to continue with the status quo?

The All Might vestige Katsuki saw -wtf was that. In the past chapters, every time he appears someone comments on how it makes no sense that he is still alive and can move (Sero, Mitsuki, Club Penguin doctor, Present Mic, if I remember right even kinda AFO and All Might?). Is this foreshadowing?

Izuku's quirklessness - is he going to get a new quirk? Keep OFA somehow? Become quirkless and a hero? Will there be discrimination and challengers because of this?

Dabi and the Todoroki family -are we confirming he is alive in the next chapters? If he is, is he going to just be unconscious, or is he waking up? What will be his reaction to see his abusive father? And his siblings? What about his mom? Is he getting therapy, because of his suicidal tendencies? Is he going to jail?

Himiko and Ochako -where is she? Alive, dead, unconscious in the hospital, recovering there, or in jail? Could she be free in another place? Are they going to talk, or are they seeing each other regularly? Is she going to be considered an adult in a trial, or is she going to be seen as the teen she is? What kind of life could they have? Is there any possibility Himiko attends UA?

Spinner -is he okay? Same previous questions apply to him. Is he going to react to Shigaraki's death? Will he create a new League and look for revenge? Is he going to connect with other ppl with mutant quirks?

Their world -will it really change? Will they find resistance from the status quo? Is the hero system going to disappear? In that case, what would bkdk's dream look like?

These are the main points I can think about at the moment. Maybe also discuss Present Mic and Aizawa, or All Might's future. There's a lot to cover, and im glad we'll get probably another volume!

#grrr talking #bnha spoilers #bkdk #dkbk #togachako #bakudeku

[samarecharm]

tw disordered eating (not in explicit detail)

Whenever i write Yusuke and his relationship w the thieves, i try to emphasize that Yusuke was in a really really Really bad space not only mentally (like the others) but physically; hes bone-stick thin and you can feel his ribs jutting out if you go for a hug. Hes a bit gaunt in the face and hes got next to no muscle mass. He tires easily and hes kind of a shit fighter bc of it. The metaverse fills in the gaps a little bit, but his body is still very frail and unprepared to transition to an active lifestyle after years of surviving off of such a bare bones calorie diet. For my Akira, it is the driving force behind wanting to takedown Madarame; hes a sucker for a pretty face but hes also unable to look away from someone actively wasting away because of the actions of their guardian.

If any of them try to mention Yusukes physical state or diet, he often deflects, angrily, reminding them that he is abnormally tall, and that that obviously contributes to his thin (frail) stature. Its very hard to get him to eat while theyre in saferooms, and he often lags behind while exploring the museum. He cant stay in combat for too long, and at some point, Akira debates if he should even allow Yusuke to stay on the team; if he passed out or Worse under Akiras watch, hed never forgive himself.

BUT. As the thieves gain his trust, Yusukes a bit more willing to indulge them. He learns quickly that they arent pitying him like he initially assumed (he is far too aware of how much he feels like hes neglected his own body; and how others can easily see that neglect). They routinely eat and hang together bc thats just how they bond, and theyre just trying to invite him into their circle properly. Akira has zero experience w this kind of thing, but Ryuji and Ann are athletes and models respectively; theyre both in fields that encourage that kind of self destructive behavior, and they have some kind of insight into how to avoid falling for those same traps, and helping people who Do end up in those scenarios.

(Anns parents, despite their absence, do their best to prepare her for how cutthroat the modeling world is; to keep her from developing the kind of habits and mindsets that let young men and women destroy themselves. ESPECIALLY bc my Ann is a plus sized model. And Ryuji, as a promising track star, would know how bad it can get for professional athletes, the lengths at which theyd go to maintain their positions and ability to compete. Hes a gym rat who loves food and nutrition and knows what he needs to keep himself fit, and thats all he really needs)

They cant feed Yusuke the way they WANT to bc hes already so thin, so they just let him take from their plates to sample things and let him feel included. He starts taking up Ryujis offers to go get meals together, even is Ryuji ends up taking almost an entire extra serving home as takeout. He lets Ann drag him away to the crepe shop and her other little snack havens, even if he only leaves w a small chocolate of sorts to take home. He lets Akira make coffee and curry for them to split when he comes to Leblanc. And maybe he lets Sojiro cook a full plate for him to take back home to eat at his leisure and away from prying eyes. Yusuke goes from bitter to extraordinarily fond rather quick, and he finds himself angry that this is yet another thing Madarame has stolen from him.

By Futabas palace, hes filled out enough that Akira doesnt immediately panic when Yusuke gets tossed onto the floor by some brute of a shadow, worried that hed shattered every goddamn bone in his body on impact. He doesnt have any real muscle by any means but his face has the faintest bit of cheek fat that Ann is able to pinch w her evil little hands, and when he looks in the mirror, the ribs peek out but they dont jut out. His breathing is better, his skin is just Pale and not Ghostly white, hes got a healthy flush when he laughs at Akiras stupid puns, and he finds himself allocating a bit more of his budget towards stocking his fridge. Sometimes, Akira can even convince him to people-watch out in the sun instead of in the subway tunnels.

At some point, Yusuke becomes very vocal about things he wants, but importantly, about Food he wants. He will eagerly allow his friends to treat him if they ask, and he picks whatever sounds nice to his ears or whatever Ann and Ryuji recommend him. Part of it is due to him feeling safe enough to ask for such things; the thieves kinda laugh about his eccentricity and forwardness, but Akira, Ann and Ryuji know how different and comfortable this Yusuke is compared to the one they met. Its silly but its good; he gets to act like this bc the thieves let him be forward- they let him voice his wants and needs without a fight.

By post game, hes got the barest hint of a tummy pouch, and Ann will attack it relentless with a firm poke whenever hes foolish enough to stretch and lift his shirt to expose it. She thinks its cute 😭 Shes really happy to see it, bc she thinks of Yusuke all skin and bones and angry and scared like a feral dog barking mad, lashing out at any help they offered and working himself sick (figuratively and literally) trying to help make things right. It makes her so sad recalling it, so she likes to remind herself that hes okay now, even if hes a little embarrassed by it. She knows Akira and Ryuji do the same, inviting Yusuke to hang and just see him w their Own eyes that hes better, and that they did the right thing by insisting he join their little ragtag group.

#persona 5 #yusuke #long post #i loooooove him #inspired by vines post about characters gaining weight as they get older #its not EXACTLY the same but it reminded me that ive wanted to make a post about this for ages #yusuke and his frail lil hollow bird bones…. #for perspective; i hc him as 6’4 to 6’6 (cant settle on one quite yet #or 193 to 198cm (assuming i converted it right) #so hes Very tall and extremely skinny. like Akira is 6’0 and even hes like bbygirl u are going to fly away in the wind #i think Yusuke will always be a little thin; as he gets older; his metabolism works as intended #but it just burns everything lighting fast. #the tummy pudge stays forever tho; fat does not stick anywhere else on his body but that little pudge and hes indifferent about it #no one can tell anyway since he wears these long and loose dress shirts #and he doesnt work out at ALL unlike the rest of the thieves (sans futaba) #so hell never really get any kind of muscle definition or even get closed to being toned #but thats better for him; he has better things to do than fret over his appearance #he has ART to make and friends to dine with

[fictionfixations]

honestly so happy that its easier to grind in hsr then genshin cause im actually able to properly build my characters instead of whatever mess i had in that game (i got the right artifacts but trying to get materials for anything was a bit of a pain to me)

also that the resin (i dont know what its called in this game im using genshin terms) can like. overflow into this other thing??? is. so helpful. (i stopped playing at one point so i just came back to both being full. and then when i realized what it actually did it was a godsend because it made it so much easier to fully commit to grinding. i know in genshin you can make the resin this little thing? condensed?? but thats a thing you have to do yourself i think)

all im missing is leveling up the lightcones and traces

and im only missing the traces because i already used up weekly bosses. THATS IT.

robin and ratio have the same boss material so all i have to do then is get the other resources which isnt actually that hard (ill only have an issue if i cant material synthesis or exchange or whatever since i need to do it for the robin stuff that you get from enemies that can ambush you, i dont know what you refer to them as, but cause i havent unlocked penacony yet lol)

and the only lightcones that might give me issue is because highlighted is penacony material stuff

(yes i put final victor on ratio LMFAO)

so YEAHH i feel like im doing pretty good in that department. also ive caught up to penaconys story i just havent started in-game because i wanted to see where it all leads up to and then go back to see all the foreshadowing and get a better understanding of what happened since it also confused me, so im waiting for a time i can just sit there for countless hours and focus. i even switched to eng vas so i dont end up misreading something

(anyway i only got to trying to max out my characters as much as i can until i can level them higher because before i got stuck on so many quests that required a fight 😭, yanqing, argenti, i hate battling you oh my god)

actually on that topic everyones relics arent fully maxed out.

ive only been leveling this cause 5 star dan heng is my main damage dealer

and the healer because im fucked without them (its natasha, but im open to changing it if i find a better healer or shield 🙏)

on that topic:

i returned to honkai star rail because aventurine. i focused on the story because aventurine. (got spoiled his story, realized 'what the fuck hes cool i like him' and watched someone go through the story) i came back in time for his banner but you know what? i had like zero wishing stuff because id stopped playing so i missed out unfortunately

i have friends who have aventurine as like one of the support characteres thingy tho? like the the where you can get support from other peoples characters

so thats been fun. but also auto is kind of bad with aventurine. or maybe because it thinks 'oh theres already a shield, so i wont e' which is pain. on the other hand actually playing instead of having it on auto is fun with aventurine. i like planning around it and thinking of who to have use their skills while keeping in mind when i should have him refresh his shield. i cant explain to you how it hurts seeing hp missing with a shield around it because i cant do anything about it (im the type of person who likes to keep my characters hp full ngl)

probably not the best decision to want shield over a healer but. i can make it work. maybe. i just want aventurine ok. (except for phantylia who as far as im aware is the only one who can just TAKE hp like that? without even affecting shields???)

#thoughts #aventurine #honkai star rail #hsr #star rail

[realbeefman]

stacy is sooo interesting because she's in love with house but knows that they will never ever be able to have a healthy, stable, sane relationship because they're too similar so. she finds house-lite instead and marries him and. essentially moves on with her life! and is successful in this because she's a moderately well-adjusted person!

wilson, in contrast, never manages to escape the inevitable, in spite of his best efforts to find a house-lite of his very own, because he's an absolute fucking freak and ends up glued to house to the bitter. bitter end

#yeah im too sleepy to revise this. UNFILTERED posting wooahh #some may b shocked but i do actually read thru most of my posts several times to make sure i didnt accidentally write mein kampfe 2 #recently ive come to the realization that i am in fact not an incredibly chill person #and that the constant paranoia and fear in which i live my life is actually PROBABLY a symptom of severe anxiety #like damn. ive always known that im pretty prone to depression but ive preetty much always been aware of that #my mom is a chronic depressive so i know the symptoms i know the signs i have a pretty good arsenal of healthy coping mechanisms #UNFORTUNATELY mommy's mental health problems did not help her not abuse me as a child #so i ended up being a terribly anxious kid who was constantly being screamed at and told i was overreacting (because i was. because i had #a severe anxiety problem that was making me react irrationally.) to everything all the time #which is you know. it is VERY difficult to deal with a mental health problem when you arent aware you have a problem! #its incredible how much. better. my life has gotten since i figured this out and started actively trying to work out what triggers it #and being able to like. realize 'oookay. there is an Issue here and it needs to be overcome' #instead of just beating on myself constantly for not being able to do things without feeling sick or getting breathing problems! #anyways. trauma dumping in tags is over now! #house md #hilson #greg house #james wilson #stacy warner

[npd-goro-akechi]

Thinking about npd akeshuake… Akechi who outwardly shows many signs of npd and Joker whose symptoms are much more internalised… Joker who gets enough supply because he has so many friends and people who support him vs Akechi who latches onto Shido and the public for any ounce of affection and acceptance

#npd akeshu makes me insane is that obvious yet #i didnt get the npd joker hc at first but im so on board now #its also an interesting way to show what often happens if pwNPD irl dont have help #that pwNPD arent inherently bad people and often just need support #i was going to add more but my brain blanked and now i dont know where i was going with this #do you guys see it do you understand the vision #persona 5 #persona 5 royal #goro akechi #shuake #akeshu #akira kusuru #ren amamiya #npd #npd headcanons

[skunkes]

if life is categorized by Before Loss and After Loss then I exist in the before but with a countdown to the after. and the countdown is always always present and debilitating. the loss will be debilitating too but i cant help myself. i will always suffer twice.

#i cant let go of it. i cant even enjoy good moments without thinking about how they'll just be memories one day #how they're already memories since moments pass so fast #everything is I'll Miss This and i already miss it and i cant believe once you're gone you're gone forever #and ill never ever see you again. and your shell is in the ground but where did the rest of you go? #should i look at your body one last time? on one hand itll be the last time i see you. #on the other hand it will be the last time i see you. #and the memory of you will die with me too. as if neither ever existed #it impacts me so much too bc i dont feel close to anybody really...and i dont make friends easily #so whats going to happen when the people who have always been there arent there anymore? #im going to be alone for so much of my life. #i will record your voice so im ready for when i cant hear it from the source while also knowing it wont be enough and one day #ill be wishing it lasted longer. it could be 12 hours long and ill want more. #how do you surpass this? it hasn't even happened. when it happens i don't know what ill do. considering my whole life has been #the timer. the countdown. hours and hours of anticipatory grief #and then ill be next. me. some of all thats left of you. it cant be true. #sorry. this gets worse every single year and its been going insane lately #id surprisingly been managing it well for months somehow ! it wouldnt cross my mind...and now its there again #like it accumulated and its all coming out right now. ive been crying for hrs tonight and last night #one day his things will just be things. things ive made and given him will be in my hands again. #talkys #i want to go hug my dad but then ill just cry over how one day i wont be able to....! how do i store it? how do i save it? #how do i preserve it forever....even as i take my own last breath.... #i cant believe im the only one of me. and my dad is the only one of him. #i wouldnt want to be reborn as anyone else. i cant believe one day i wont get to draw or eat or be comfy in bed anymore. #i cant take it !! im so scared. ill be scared until the end. and you wont be there to hold my hand. im going to be alone. #and none of those years of grief and joy and memories will matter. #i wonder if it would help to tell him about this. i need something to hold onto for when it happens. anything. but i also know it'll make i #hurt more; obviously. just another piece of him that'll be gone one day

[nabsthevulture]

Perhaps a controversial opinion but I'm gonna say it

Crate train your dogs please

#like jesus christ #'my dog breaks out of every crate i get!' look into an impact wait for sales look at gunner look at lucky duck #like yes these crates are fucking expensive but if you dont properly crate train your dog from a you age those are some of your options #idk man #it helps with scuffles #it keeps other animals safe #'its not fair to crate one and not the other!' it doesnt fucking matter #if one dog bullies the other or they dont get along and you arent around crate one of them #im not saying crate your dog 24 hours a day but i AM saying that a dog needs to learn and be comfortable in a crate #but! there are some dogs that no matter what you do will not have a good time in a crate #it will upset them #but think of it this way #would you rather your dog be safer during travel/vet appointments/when guests are over/etc. or be unsecured/overstimulated/and so forth #idk #dl

[transexualbutchfagdyke]

current mood tbh

#its so funny being self aware tbh #like yeah i know exactly what and why im doing this. however i also know im not willing yo change so theres no use in getting help #bc you cannot force someone to get better when they arent ready to help themselves. and i know im hurting myself but im not willing to help #myself yet. so like. i know i need hrlp but i know it wont do anything until i want to change. and i dont yet. #its so fun /s #ratt squeaks

[bigmammallama5]

Do you sell your pottery anywhere?

Just through the shop of the community arts center I make/work/teach at! Right now it looks like my tumblers and a mug are still there, but I'm not completely sure since the website has been wonky lately. I guess?? They ship? I've only ever bought items in person from there, but you could ask if you're interested!

#ask me stuff! #pottery #sorry that's the only place #i dont have the space or the bandwidth or resources to run an etsy or anything #but thats more than i used to do lol #besides for friends and family #but yeah its a 60 40 split in profit where i get 60% #and honestly i am 10000% cool with yall getting my pots from sawtooth bc that helps support the arts center #i need to make some more things for them #im also thinking of submitting to their holiday sale at the end of the year but we'll see how much brain space i have #the hardest part is actually saving pots to sell bc i give so many away lmao #and with this last soda kiln in march i'll be giving a lot away and a lot to the studio's seconds sale #bc they arent BAD pots but they arent good enough #too many errors #too many nasty wadding stickages making ugly bottoms #but they can still be nice functional pots for someone who doesnt care about that #i do unfortunately have a box of pots that are lost basically #too much silicon carbide drippings on them #i'll break those and repurpose the pieces for drainage in my potted plants #but also selling through the center makes my taxes A LOT EASIER LMAO #bc i get a form directly from them

[rxttenfish]

you know, i think the thing about miranda that most make or breaks if any given writing for her is any good, is that you just can't tell if she's doing something on purpose or not.

she switches hard from cute, innocent, head full of fluff and so oblivious and kinda stupid that she matches scott, to having such expertise and cruelty in manipulation and being able to not only get her way but to get it with such violence that it takes everyone else aback — and there is NO way for any other character in the situation to tell if both really are true and equal aspects of her personality and who she is, or if she really is planning this all along and all the innocence was just a farce.

both are given equal weight by miranda, both seem equally likely, and both are roles that miranda inhabits so wholly that there's not really any flaws anyone can find in either one of them. you expect one, the other one catches you off guard. for someone who makes such a show of wearing her heart on her sleeve, it is incredibly hard to actually tell what's going through miranda's brain at any given moment.

#all the care guide says is 'biomass' #monster prom #miranda vanderbilt #yes i still have thoughts about miranda as i always do #ofc my answer to this in my writing is ''its both at the same time'' #''both manipulation and her being genuine'' #because i really like that as who miranda is (and most of my writing deals with who IS miranda really) #but also. i think it really does need to be an open question in text #you need to be able to argue both at a single moment using everything that miranda has done up to that moment #and still feel like you arent getting it Right #which is also exactly the thing i love about writing miranda #open questions and ambiguity are FUN #(this is also where the miravi comes in because that too. is answering the question. of who really is miranda.) #(specifically focusing on who miranda is beneath the crown and the title) #(and who she actually wants to be) #(both with aaravi being able to be the hero and save miranda from her situation and even from herself) #(but also with them both thinking to the future and having no fucking idea what they want or what will happen) #(but deciding to tentatively trust each other to work towards a shared and better future) #(this is also why both miri having an eating disorder and aaravi directly trying to help that) #(and aaravi having an interest in food and cooking is so Important) #(you have to deal with the question and all the problems it raises if you want the solution to grow and become something beautiful)

[strrwbrrryjam]

fucking hate the people who go into the replies of posts that say "hey, maybe don't hate literal children for simply existing," and go "Uhm! 🤓 Actually, 🤪 I am correct for hating on and beefing with literal babies as they are loud and annoying," as if you, yourself, aren't loud and annoying.

#like. okay. im biased i will admit that. i have kid siblings who are loud and annoying #but its like. so were you? when you were younger? #the whole purpose of a child is to grow and to learn #to learn what's right and what's wrong and how to act appropriately in a society #but to do so. they need help - but they arent getting that help #parents prefer to have ipads parent the children they chose to have #kid friendly spaces are either destroyed or abandoned or unsafe to be in #due to a variety of issues #like crime cars crazy adults etc #even online they arent safe. websites i used to go on when i was a children #literally built for children are gone #apps come with paywalls or in app purchases #cable is gone - which is like good sure except for the fact that all the television channels for children are all gone #there are really no good shows for children that are free anymore #there is no really safe online spaces for kids anymore. even when they try to stick to fandoms associated with children media like bluey #or trolls or mlp its dominated with adults who the space unsafe for them #yes it is annoying when children go into adult spaces and are loud and annoying. adults should have those spaces #and we do! #but have SOME sympathy please #children are growing up in a world that is not designed to keep them safe. happy or fulfilled. #they. like us. did not ask to be here - they had no choice in the matter #and im not saying you should love children. no thats not it #what im trying to say is to just. learn some patience and some empathy #and to not beef with LITERAL BABIES #idk if his is coherent im bareky awake as it is but god. god i had to get this out #also im not saying that adults cant be in fandoms meant for children. thats not it at all. im in the mlp and trolls fandom #but what im saying is you cant go into a daycare and get mad that babies are there. thats where theyre meant to be #strawberry speaks

[sennaverstappen]

.

#tbd #i sometimes genuinely feel like a freak for liking this sport so much #like ik everyone who follows it LIKES it #but to me its like. incredibly important and a big part of my life #idk ive never really been good with interests and shame surrounding them #probably has to do with years of bullying #and me being audhd and hyperfixating #but ive always tried to hide my interests from the ppl sround me bc i know many others wont #wont… be as passionate #which isnt their fault i get it. i am a bit unusual #but i just wish i knew some people who share my level of enthusiasm #i feel like there arent many people out there like me #sigh. if you relate pls lmk it would help me feel less alone but no need to lie #im just rlly going through it rn

[aria0fgold]

My headcanons for the named trio in The Cursing of Chateau Castle series:

Josephandre is a big bear. It just fits for him I think! He gets he/him pronouns, and as a way to make him a liiiil more relatable for Mira, he'd have two craft types (Rock type being his main one and paper craft for the other). Battle style wise, I think it fits him to be more of a self-sustaining tank. He buffs defense, heals, and puts up shields. For his weapon, he'd use his fists like Isabeau. He'll be the second fastest in the trio.

Lady Irene-Janine-Kanine looks like an elegant noblewoman on the outside but she has vibes similar to Euphrasie! She gets she/her pronouns. Her craft type is Paper. Battle style wise, she's more on the offensive side, a main dps kind of thing. Most of her skills focus on buffing attack and speed, she'd have an item that helps regen her hp a lil bit and her chosen weapon is an umbrella. The tip is a sharp blade so it's used like a spear that has a hidden sword in its handle. Open it, and it becomes a shield! That'd be one of her skills too, although it's only applicable to her. She's the fastest one of the trio.

Pierre-Jacques-Erneste looks like a nobleman and carries himself as such! He gets he/they pronouns. Their craft type is Scissors. Battle style wise, he's more of a debuffer, skills focusing on weakening the enemies, slowing them down, poisoning them. Their weapon is a sword dagger, though he doesn't seem to be able to handle it well, how clumsy! But he Is a nobleman so it makes sense! Oh but... why doesn't he have a title? They're the slowest one of the trio, how strange, he seemed to be faster than Lady Irene-Janine-Karine that one time though.

#aria rants #how do i even tag these things bro im like-- why am i such a fan of a fragmented series in isat #okay so-- josephandre relied mostly on raw strength when he was travelling all alone before meeting the others #and i think he'd have a fun uncle vibe to him. which makes it easy for others to approach him and befriend him #but he Also carries a sort of pride and dignity to him which makes the others mistake him for a nobleman cuz of it #esp considering the fact that he later became famous for helping those in need and such. #lady irene on the other hand. being a noble she's always had to keep her guard up. also doesnt help that noblewomen #got the short end of the stick what with the ''arrange marriage'' things and being below noblemen #her umbrella weapon helps a lot in warding off the assholes. i think that during the journey with josephandre's party #she got to finally be herself without needing to sugarcoat her words in a way that a noble should. she would also figure out a #way to improve on her shield spell to not only apply to just her but her entire party too. she cares a lot about them after all #meanwhile i got a Whole scenario for pierre (being an illegitimate child of a noble family and all that. i made a post bout it) #he's actually a lot more capable than what he makes himself appear as. but its like part of the plan on getting the others #to lower their guards around him for when pierre betrays them. in actuality pierre is actually faster than irene altho #not much stronger still (irene and josephandre are still stronger than him) considering that pierre mainly focused on #stealth type attacks. hes more used to using a sword than a dagger (he mightve wanted to prove their worth) #it makes their battle style and weapon clash due to the fact that swords arent that good for stealth much than a dagger #its one of the reasons why hes trying to get used to the dagger than the sword. but it is a bit difficult to learn a new weapon

[bunnihearted]

.

#it went!!! idk lately my pain treshhold has been so low bc im in pain all the time #so i just dont wnna be in pain anymore... he said that now it'll still hurt for a few days T-T #but he wasnt exactly sure what it was but i had.. a cavity?? #im not rlly sure abt the english terms for all of this but the tooth is dying lol #but instead of immediately killing it nd getting a root fill he said that we should give the tooth a chance #so he fixed what he could fix #i hate dentist treatments bc of all the air nd water nd my anxiety i need to swallow constantly #but this time i actually told them abt it nd he was very helpful sksks #he even said 'ok now take a break nd swallow' so i didnt need to be so anxious #nd it was a relief bc he wasnt bad at all. he was actually rlly nice nd easy to talk to phewww #it cost abt $80 so i can manage to be without that until next week!!!! #so yeah it went much better than i had anticipated so im happy abt that #but yeah the problem still isnt 100% fixed yet so im still not relieved #he said i had a cavity in my other tooth as well but that we needed to check that at another time #im so frustrated bc i brush my teeth 2/day i use mouthwash i floss.... #and for the last 7 months i havent even had any sugar!!!!! like why did this still happen.. o.o #oh nd he also said that i probably clench my teeth nd yeah i do that a lot more than i've realized #your teeth arent supposed to be touching!! never!! only when u eat #my teeth.... are touching pretty much all day omg. bc im so tense nd anxious #he said that he couldnt be sure bc he didnt have enough info to go on but that could have contributed to this #well well... i did it nd went even if i didnt want to #hopefully my tooth will be better now. nd i have another appt in may to see what i could get done further #if financial aid for it gets approved tho it might not #but yeah.. god dental pain nd issues is my no. 1 fear bc im poor nd i cant afford it

[frobby]

I hate that disabled people need to be diagnosed to ask for accomodation. Accomodation should be available to everyone not just groups that *Need* it because if something makes someones life easier it should be available to them whether or not some doctor says its okay.

#Thinking about this cuz i asked my college professor if she knew a screen reader that worked with pdfs she was assigning #And she told me to call the disability office #But to get help from the disability office i need to be actually diagnosed and i dont want to/cant #So i just gotta struggle #Any autistics know of a free pdf reader that actually works let me know #This isnt even talking about people who are disabled and dont know about it #Idk if this a hot take or not #Happy autism acceptance month #Autism acceptance makes me think someone is giving me an award for autism #Which i accept graciously #I like being autisic but its so hard cuz my support needs arent very high so it feels like im gaslighting myself #I need to stop doing that #actually autistic #autism #disability #Just to add im not against getting diagnosed at all #Its just the theres some very simple accomodations that are unavaliable to people when not diagnosed and i think thats stupid