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hitomisuzuya · 2 days

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Aventurine x fem!reader. Smut. Cunnilingus. Slight manipulation. Soft in some spots. Purely self indulgent. Implied size difference (Aventurine is taller)

My hands are shaking while I write this. I'm gonna slink off and hide when I am done 😭 I'm very nervous.

Aventurine had felt a soft tug on his sleeve one night at a roulette table. He kept betting more and more each time he won, and was drawing a crowd around him. He looked over and then down.

"Hold on," You'd said in the shyest voice, finding it hard to look away from his eyes. You'd never seen eyes quite like his. Eyes that could stop your heart in your chest with just one glance, the shock of how beautiful they were restarting it.

You'd been looking for a way, any way to get his attention all night. "Let me kiss your roulette chip," An even shyer blush crept into your cheeks, which he found incredibly endearing. "For good luck," You added, forcing yourself to look away from his eyes to control your pounding heart.

It bewildered him nonetheless that someone was showing him such sweet consideration without him having to ask for it.

Over the next few months, it soon became routine for you brush your lips against whatever gambling tool Aventurine was using that night. All in the name of good luck. Sure, he never lost but you, you were starting to make his winning feel even better.

That led to lingering touches and looks between the two of you. And it wasn't long before he felt the foreign feeling of wanting a level of deeper intimacy with you.

Aventurine knew he could seduce you for little tastes of you at a time, but why do that when he could go all in and win the chance in the fashion he was accustomed to.

He chose to simple game to play with you. Blackjack. First one to bust three times lost. And if he won, he got to eat you out. He couldn't lie to himself and say that he didn't choose this game specifically to get what he wanted.

You'd innocently told him that you weren't very good at math, agreeing to play if he checked your math for you.

His gloved fingers looked so beautiful dealing the card. He could see you considering your decisions to hit or stay very carefully. Did you want to impress him?

Aventurine selfishly fudged the math each time. His smirk on your third "bust" was one for the ages. One that made your heart flutter. Your wager was that if you won, you got play with his cat cakes.

Which he would still let you do. The way you smiled, giggled and cooed at them was just too adorable for him not to let you play with them.

After he devoured you first, of course.

Aventurine took his time slowly licking up and down the stripe of your cunt outside of your panties. The soft, shaky sighs that started to sound from your pretty mouth as his tongue deftly teased at your clit, coaxing it to throb stronger with each languid lick as his saliva soaked onto your panties.

He chuckled softly as you reached down to peel your panties aside. "I'll do you one better, sweetheart. Let me," He slowly pulled your panties down your legs and discarded them on the floor next to his bed.

Aventurine's eyes drank in the sight of your puffy pussy, almost embarrassingly wet from the teasing ministrations of his tongue. He was determined to take care of properly, returning all that consideration you'd showered him with by kissing his gambling chips for good luck.

You clamped a hand over your mouth to muffle your loud moan as his tongue parted your folds. He chuckled, his tongue dancing on your clit. He could tell you were being reserved about your noises.

His fingers brushed on the inside of your thigh, making you shiver as your hips suddenly jerked to grind against his tongue, the taste of you assaulting his senses. "You look cute when you are shy, but let me hear you enjoying yourself," He encouraged with an easy smile.

Aventurine didn't want you to think. The only thing he wanted you to focus on was him, and how good his tongue was making you feel. He groaned happily into your cunt as you grinded against his mouth again.

He was tentative about holding onto your thighs or your hips too tightly at first while he lost himself in your pussy. He didn't want to restrict your movements. Anything to keep you grinding and imprinting your taste on his tongue.

The way your hand shook as the found the back of his head, tugging on his soft, blonde hair as you pressed his mouth down onto your cunt was addicting. His fingers found purchase on your thighs, pressing inevitable marks of possession.

Now that Aventurine had you, he wasn't going to let you go. Especially not when you tasted this fucking good. He was absolutely reeling as he plunged his tongue as far inside of you as it could go.

He swirled his tongue, and it felt like every pleasurable nerve ending in your body was coming to life. The staticy haze of pleasure was overwhelming. It wasn't long before you forgot all about covering your mouth with your hand to hold back your noises.

The feeling to submit to his every intimate whim gripped you like a vice. He wanted you to moan, so moan you did. Your legs shook as his mouth latched out your clit, the wet slurping noises that mingled your moans said how much he was enjoying himself.

The wetter you got, the louder you got, the more your body twitched in response to him made him want more with each lick and suck.

Aventurine didn't even hear himself whimpering at first as he rutted his aching cock into the mattress. He was completely and wholly focused on you. You looked so beautiful with tears of pleasure welling in your eyes, his tongue teasing and swirling between your gummy walls.

His cock throbbed harder each time feeling your walls tighten around his tongue. Tears of pleasure were so interesting to see. He was used to tears of different variety. It was refreshing for him.

He vibrated moan after moan onto your clit as he sucked on it, feeling twice the rush observing you pinching one of your nipples to chase the high he was building up oh so agonizingly slow.

"Aventurine!" Your cry of his name as your orgasm hit you sounded even sweeter than he imagined. His tongue never stopped fucking into you through your orgasm.

"Let's up the ante," He purred, releasing your clit with a wet pop. You looked so defenselessly beautiful all fucked out above him. "How about we bet that I can make you squirt now?"

You pushed his mouth back down onto your pussy in response.

#honkai star rail #hsr aventurine #aventurine #aventurine smut #aventurine x reader #aventurine x y/n #aventurine x you #honkai star rail imagines

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chubstiger · 3 days

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Nanami x chubby!reader

MDNI

Nanami was obsessed looking at you. Looking too pretty in the black skater skirt and white tank top. You bending down, seeing those pink striped panties covering your cute pussy. You are basically taking care of the plants inside the living room, minding your own business. Nanami sat on the love seat, legs spread out, leaning back, enjoying the view once he noticed what you were doing. He grew hard just thinking on what he could do to you. Walk up behind you, pressing his bulge on that plump ass of yours and taking you. He bit his lips, wondering if he should. Before he made his decision, you turned around abruptly to face him, "Ken- what are you doing?" You noticed he was trying to cover his front from being shown. You raised brow at him, asking him again.

"Nothing, love." He pressed, slightly embarrassed. You saw the flush of red on his cheeks and ears. Smirking, you slid towards you smoothly and stood between his legs. Crouching down as you looked at him and hummed. He gulped in anticipation.

"Seems like you have a growing problem?" You teased, tailing the clothed cock up and down with your fingers after you moved his hands out of the way. You felt his cock twitched slightly.

"Love...please." He groaned, wanting more.

"Ah, ah, words, baby." You scolded.

"Suck me off, Y/n, please?" He softly spoke in need. The thrill washed over you as you unbuckled his trousers and unzipped the zipper. Nanami lifted his hips to help you pull down his underwear and pants, revealing his long, hard rod. The tip was so red, dripping with pre-cum. He was so pretty just sitting there, flushed and panting. You gently grabbed his cock and thumbed his tip, lubricating it even more. Moving up and down, you started to use your tongue. From the base to the top, you slowly slide up to taste him. He groaned, feeling more sensitive than usual. You cunt pulsed from the nosies he makes. With no warning, you quickly engulfed him, almost hitting the back of your throat. You hummed, introducing the vibrations causing him the throw back his head in ecstasy. "Fuck, love." You started to suck him and tongue playing around bottom of the base and under the mushroom tip. Salvia coating his cock, making your hands easier to slide up and down with your mouth. The nosies of you sucking him off made Nanami feral as he bucked his hips into your mouth. Unfortunately for him, you grabbed his hips and pushed them down. You wanted complete control. "N-no!" He grunted in disappointment, but somehow engaging the action made him more horny.

You moaned, taking him deeper into your mouth. He tasted too good that you can do this all day long and never get tired of it. He panted so hard, looking down at you. Your eyes met his, and you slurp him up and twirled your tongue. The hooded eyes with his mouth open, drool leaking at the corner, caused you to suck him faster. "Ah, fuck! Gonna cum soon, love!" He warned, grabbing your head and fisting your hair. Still holding his hips in place, you went deeper, making gurgling sounds as you take him whole. He pulsed, knowing he was close to cumming, "Y/N!" He came into your mouth. You started to slurp his cum and swallowing it. Some dripped out, sliding down your chin. You cheekily grinned at him as he gave his usual pout look.

"Delicious!" You claimed feeling proud of yourself. He huffed, amused and lifted a startled you up onto his lap. "H-hey!" He kissed you deeply, bucking into your clothed cunt. You moaned into the kiss, feeling his member growing harder. He growled lowly.

"My turn..."

You gulped, nervously. .

Worth it.

Fin.

Notes: hahahaha, man I love sub Nanami too.

#jjk #jujutsu kaisen #jjk imagines #nanami kento #kento x reader #kento smut #kento x y/n #kento nanami #jjk kento #jujutsu nanami #jjk nanami #nanami smut #nanami x reader #jjk smut #jjk smau #chubby reader #chubby

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gr7mes · 3 days

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NERVOUS “you’ve got me nervous to speak.” carl grimes x fem!reader

tags: angst to fluff, use of y/n, cussing

a/n: back from the dead!! sorta based on nervous by the nbhd, and there’s also a little tsitp steven and taylor action that i used for inspiration. lyrics r in bold + italics or in between paras. enjoy lovelies!!

the bond between you and carl was truly inseparable. you two had been through it all together, and never once had either of you thought about ending it all.

that was until now.

god, you don’t know how you found yourself in this situation. he’s just a friend. he’s always been just a friend. that’s what you believed, and that’s what you always told people.

so how come, all of a sudden, he started becoming more than that? how come, out of the blue, you started getting butterflies at his gaze? it was an unfamiliar feeling, and you didn’t like it. you didn’t like it at all.

you didn’t wanna do anything to jeopardize your beloved friendship, especially over something so dumb. you weren’t gonna lose everything all because of a stupid crush. so, after ages of decision making, you finally set your mind on a reasonable solution.

should i be quiet?

you were just gonna take some time to yourself. you were gonna stop talking to him for a bit. that’s all you needed, just some space. it couldn’t be that hard to lose feelings. besides, he would understand, right?

he in fact did not understand. “wanna come over? i just finished reading that comic you wanted.” he said, a grin plastered onto his face. “not today.” you quickly shut him down, and you could see the happiness on his face slowly fade away.

“oh, that’s fine. tomorrow?” you felt so bad. you really did wanna hang out with him, but you had to push away these feelings first. “i just need some time to myself for a while.”

your felt your heart pang when you looked at his expression. he gave you a slight smile, attempting to mask his disappointment. but you knew him. you knew him well enough to know he was upset. “yeah, i get it. i’ll see you later y/n.” he said, walking away. all of the energy he had when he approached you was long gone now.

it had been days, weeks even. you hadn’t uttered a word to him. so why wasn’t it working? why did you still long for him? it was so frustrating.

not to mention, you were a mess. you would often find yourself with your head buried deep within your pillow, sniffling as tears flowed down your cheeks. on top of that, you weren’t getting enough sleep. you just missed carl.

you figured the best thing you could do for yourself was to just get some fresh air. after all, it was no use trying to fix stuff with carl, you already fucked it all up.

you took in the breeze, as you fiddled with your fingers. if it was a normal day, you would’ve been happy. you loved the cold, but today it was different. today, it made you feel numb. it made everything worse.

you tried getting it off your mind. you tried to think about other things, but you couldn’t stop thinking about the look he had on his face the last time you talked to him. his smile was wiped clean off his face, and it was all your fault.

you started to feel your eyes prick with tears. a single drop slowly traveled down your face, and you quickly wiped it off with your sleeve.

you just wanted to cry, but you weren’t gonna let yourself do it out in the public. after all, once you started crying, you weren’t gonna stop. so, you turned around and picked up the pace. you were headed back home, where you could be vulnerable.

your head was faced down, trying to hide your glassy eyes from anyone who could potentially see. “y/n?” you hear someone call out to you. the voice sounded familiar, and you instantly knew who it was without even lifting your head in the slightest.

it was carl. you had to get away. just pretend you didn’t hear him, you thought to yourself. your footsteps quickened, until you heard his pleading voice once again.

“just talk to me. please. is it something i said? i’m sorry for whatever i did.”

“you didn’t do anything. it’s me. it’s all my fucking fault because my stupid self caught feelings for her best friend.” you wanted to say, but you restrained yourself.

you finally came to a stop, turning around to face him. as soon as you met his gaze, you wanted to cry the hardest you’d ever cried before.

he slowly stepped closer to you until his taller figure was in close in front of you. “can you please talk to me? you know i won’t get mad. you know i’m listening. so please, just please tell me what’s been bothering you.” he begged, his eyes softening.

you let out a sigh, still sniffling. “it’s not your fault carl.” you said, your voice barely audible. “then what is it?” he said, keeping his voice at the same, calm volume.

“i-i like you, and it’s really embarrassing.” you confess. you instantly regret your choice of words when you see a frown start to appear on his face. “i don’t know what i was expecting, but that was really fucking mean.” he says, about to walk away.

“no, carl. it’s embarrassing because of how much i like you.” there it is. that’s what you’ve been holding in. it felt weird hearing the words coming out of your mouth. “how is that embarrassing?” he questioned, the tender look started to come back on his face.

ask me and ill tell you how i’ve been

“i- it’s like i forgot how to act around you. i’m always scared i’m gonna mess up. you’ve got me nervous to speak.”

that was the last thing you managed to get out before he pulled you into his chest for a tight hug. the dam holding your tears back broke.

the wetness stained his shirt, but he didn’t care. he rubbed your back with his arm, soothing you. you missed his embrace, the feeling you would get when you were in his arms felt heavenly.

after a few more seconds of the hug, carl shifted his hands to your shoulders. he softly pushed you back a little bit to get a look at your face.

he reached for your face to wipe any tears. “m’ sorry for ignoring you.” you said, voice soft and quiet. he shook his head, giving you a gentle smile.

“you’re okay sweet girl, don’t worry about it.” he said. “i-it’s not okay. i ignored you for so long, i just cut you off like that. without a single warning. it was so inconsiderate and i’m really sor-”

hush, baby, don’t you say another word

“you never shut up do you?” he said, cutting you off mid sentence before he crashed his lips onto yours. your eyes widened, and your movements froze before you slowly adjusted to the kiss. your eyes fluttered closed before you hesitantly tilted your head to get closer.

this was a new experience for the both of you, but it felt like he had years of practice. the way his hands made their way around your body, it sent shivers down your spine.

after what seemed like an eternity, you both pulled away. the sounds of your mixed heavy breaths filled the air. carl’s hand reached for your face before he wiped your slightly smudged chapstick.

he then tilted your chin up to meet his gaze. the gesture made the butterflies in your stomach act up more than they ever had in your life.

i got goosebumps all over me

“next time, just let me know what’s on your mind, yeah?” he asks. “okay.” you say, looking at him with pure admiration. “that’s my girl.”

#carl grimes #carl grimes x reader #carl grimes x y/n #the walking dead #carl grimes x fem!reader #twd #twd x reader #carl grimes angst #carl grimes fluff #carl grimes oneshot #twd oneshot #the walking dead oneshot #carl grimes imagine #carl grimes smut #twd imagine #the walking dead imagine #the walking dead x reader #chandler riggs

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roxxie-spirt · 1 day

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just to let it out there THIS AARONS OUTFIT ISNT MY REDESIGN I’m still plotting ( I am keeping his stupid eye mask it just has holes in it now… also it’s Jacob’s shirt :3) anyways back to the mainnnn subject

I just can’t decide is the clear deal I got two ideas that I’ll share right now that I’m torn , to let it be clear, shad and Irene aren’t romantic partners in this rewrite ( but honestly I’m mixed opinioned on it )

Aaron ! Just plain and simple, he’s the reincarnation of shad because of his bloodline being connected, the relic was pass down generations until Zane stole it. Aaron never absorbed the relic because he honestly did not know what it was since by generation to generations the story grew thin and fictitious. He is a DIRECT descendant of shad , great great and so on and so forth grandson of shad

Laurance ! Now shad is Aaron’s great ancestor and Aaron looks horrifyingly similar to shad, but that’s all a red herring. Laurance is the true reincarnation of shad his soul decided to choose Laurances life as its new life, or at least part of shads soul. Laurance of course he doesn’t know he’s the reincarnation of this ancient evil, and he doesn’t find out until his calling to the shadow realm. While Laurance was being made into a shadow knight the essence of shad who had been just a shadow that roamed the halls of his castle, felt a sudden urge to follow its tug until eventually he sees Laurance surrounded by his shadow knights. Until ungrth crashed into the walls and rescuing Laurance. The reason why Laurances calling is so much louder and way more aggressive is because part of shad is calling him out personally, he wants his soul back and he doesn’t want to wait any longer.

THAT A QUICK LIL THING ANYWAYS BTW THIS DOESNT MEAN LAURANCE WOULD DIE IN SEASON2… THATS THATS still Aaron and there’s a reason for that, which I’m not gonna say because I love keeping people on edgeeither way one decision or the other it doesn’t matter to me Aaron in my rewrite is important just not a romance interest.. ( that doesn’t mean Alina doesn’t exist btw )

#aphmau #mcd #aphverse #mcd rewrite #roxxie_spirt #aphblr #laurance mcd #laurance zvahl #aaron lycan #Aaron mcd #poll #I’m really trying to keep myself for spoiling a lot of my rewrite ok #it’s hard #aphblur

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drabbles-mc · 2 days

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Never Been Us

Angel Reyes x F!Reader

Warnings: 18+, language, angst, mentions of character death

Word Count: 3.1k

A/N: the way i've been so blocked up and unable to finish fics and somehow i finished 2 in the last 2 days. no idea where it came from but I'm not questioning it. i started and finished this tonight. throwing it out there before i can second-guess myself lmao

When Angel rolled into your driveway and saw your front door open, the first thing that went through him was panic. You’d never been the type that was stupid or reckless enough to leave your front door open. And with the way that things had been going in Santo Padre, what with the club and the cartels and Border Patrol moving in, you were less likely than ever to leave yourself so vulnerable. Hell, lately whenever Angel showed up your door had not only been closed, but also locked.

Putting the stand down on his bike, he left his helmet hanging off the handlebar and started making his way towards your front door. He’d pulled his gun from his kutte before he even had one foot on your front step. He kept his breath trapped in the back of his throat as he clutched his gun tight. He kept it pointed down towards the ground for now, but he was ready for that to change.

He stepped through the threshold, one boot hitting the paper-thin throw rug just inside your door. It hardly muffled the sound. Before he could bring the other half of his body into your house, though, you popped up, quickly coming around the corner.

The sudden nature of both your appearances had you both cursing in surprise. You hugged the box in your hands tighter to your chest as your half-yell turned into a sigh of relief mixed with exhaustion. All of the emotions that just shot through you were evident as ever as you said, “What the fuck, Angel?”

His eyebrows were still practically in his hairline as he tucked his gun back away again. “The fuck you got your door open for? Had me thinkin’ someone fuckin’ broke—” He cut his own sentence off as he really took in the sight of you, the box in your hands that was hastily labeled BEDROOM. “What…?”

The confusion on his face made you unable to keep meeting his eyes. Your gaze dropped to the box you were holding, the seams of cardboard and tape suddenly more interesting than you would’ve ever imagined they’d be. Even though you weren’t looking directly at him, you heard the way he was shifting in the doorway, looking back at your pickup truck. You knew he’d see the other boxes you’d already stacked in the bed of it. You weren’t quite done loading up yet, but you were getting there.

He waited for you to look at him again before asking, “What’s going on?”

There was only one answer to his question, and it was an obvious one. But you knew that if the shoe was on the other foot you’d be doing the same thing—you’d need to hear him say it. Clearing your throat, you gave a shrug that accomplished nothing in terms of softening the blow of, “I’m leaving.”

His frown deepened, confusion transforming into hurt that almost had you rethinking your decision to get the hell out of Santo Padre. “L-leaving? You can’t…you can’t just leave.”

“Angel—”

“Nah,” he shook his head, “nah you don’t get to do that. You can’t just leave. You didn’t even—were you even gonna tell me?”

The lump in the back of your throat felt like it was on the brink of choking you. “Yeah.”

“Before you crossed fuckin’ county lines?”

Tears stung your eyes. “Angel, please.”

He backpedaled out your doorway and back onto your front step. “Don’t do that. Don’t say my name like that, like I fuckin’ matter to you.”

“You do—”

“You’re leaving me. You can’t stand there with your shit all boxed up,” he gestured to you and the bed of your truck, “and try to tell me I fuckin’ matter to you.”

There was no getting out of this argument now. It was an argument you’d been planning to have over the phone, an argument you were hoping would happen when there were more than a few area codes between you. You didn’t want it to be like this—not because he didn’t matter, but because he mattered too much. And you knew that if you had to look into those sad, puppy-dog eyes and tell him that you were leaving, and if you had to tell him why, you just might hang it all up and not leave at all. You couldn’t afford that.

There was no avoiding the argument but you didn’t want to do it while standing there holding a box that had books and trinkets from your bookshelf packed inside it. You slipped past him without a word and walked down to your truck. Angel didn’t follow, hanging back and watching as you set the box on the tailgate and gave it a strong push to send it sliding and landing right alongside the others.

When you walked back past him and into your house, that was when he decided to follow you. He shut the door behind the two of you, following you through your now essentially empty home. It was strange for him to walk through your living room and not see all of your picture frames and plants, the art prints that had covered your walls. You stopped in the kitchen, leaning back against the counter and facing him. You watched him look around, take in the fridge that was no longer covered in magnets and photographs and takeout menus. No more dishes in the sink or drainboard, no more succulents on the windowsill. Seeing it all empty made him remember that you were just renting this place anyway, that you could pack up and leave whenever you wanted. And now you were. Then the hurt and anger swelled up in his chest again.

“Why?” he asked.

You let out a hollow laugh, raking your fingernails along your scalp before letting your arms fall back to your sides again. “You’re really asking me that? This…this town is fucked, Angel. You know that. I know you’ve been waist-deep in your shit with the club but…but that’s the exact type of shit I’m talking about.”

“This town’s always been fucked, querida,” he tried to argue, tried to pepper in a pet name like it would change anything. “What’s so different now?”

The answer to that question made bile creep up your throat. You didn’t think that you could say it to him. Not the real answer, the raw unedited cut of it. “Everything,” you answered, a shake to your voice that was never there when you talked to him.

“C’mon,” he said, tone softer than it had been this entire time as he stepped in towards you. “Don’t leave me like this. Don’t do this to me.”

“This isn’t just about you.”

“No, it’s not,” he agreed. He put his hands on your hips, pulling himself closer to you. His voice dropped to something just above a whisper. “After all the shit we—”

“We?” you cut him off, not yelling but your tone cutting nonetheless. “We? You’re choosing now to start throwing that word around?”

His brows came together, offended and confused. “What’re you talkin’ about? It’s always been us.”

You laughed, a cruel sound as tears prickled along your waterline again. “Oh, has it? It’s always been us?”

“Yeah, what’re you—”

“It’s never been us, Angel. Never. It’s been you, chasing around every girl who stumbles into that clubhouse and then running back to me when you get bored of them. It’s been you going out being reckless with the club and then coming to me when you need someone to patch you up, someone to tell you that you’re right and they’re all wrong. It’s been you coming to me whenever it’s fucking convenient for you.” You pushed him away, a half-hearted shove. “And it’s been me fucking letting you.”

“I—”

“And I would’ve been fine still doing that. You know that? Fucking sad, but I would’ve done it. Would’ve just kept right on pretending that it was enough, or that it was going to change. But then—” you stopped short, still not able to spit the words out. “I just can’t do it anymore, Angel.”

Despite Angel’s lack of ability to really commit, to really let himself be with you in the way that you really wanted, he’d always done his best with what little he had for you. Over the years he’d been your shoulder to cry on, his flannels becoming tissues for you. He’d set you loose in the scrapyard when your anger bubbled up so much that you needed to break something because it was the only alternative you had to hurting yourself or someone else—even gave you the gloves and safety glasses to do it the right way. He’d kept the other side of your bed warm when you were both feeling lonely, making the lines defining what you two were really start to blur.

He’d been there with you through all of that and yet he hadn’t ever seen the emotion saturating your expression now. He’d never seen you so afraid. Your arms were crossed tightly over your chest, fists clenched as tightly as you could manage. Your leg bounced no matter how much you tried to will it to stop. He’d never seen you like this. How had it gotten so bad?

He stepped in close to you again. Placing his hands on the outsides of your arms, he gave you a light, reassuring squeeze. “What’s got you so scared?”

You shook your head, staring down at the floor because you couldn’t make yourself look at him. “I can’t.”

“What?”

“I can’t stay here. I can’t be comfortable here. I’m not…I’m not safe here.”

He brought one hand up to cup the side of your face. His thumb traced gently along your cheek in a way that made your bottom lip tremble. “I’ll always keep you safe, querida. You know that.”

He sounded so earnest but you knew too much now to be able to believe it. You’d tried. God, you had tried so hard to buy into that the last few weeks but you just couldn’t fool yourself. “I don’t.”

“What the fuck happened?”

Tears finally made their way to your cheeks, racing along the lines of Angel’s hand as it remained holding your face. You didn’t want to say it. You didn’t even want to think about it, but it’s all that was playing through your mind. Truthfully, it was the thing that had been playing through your mind every day since it had happened.

You could still hear it so vividly, the sound of him pounding on the door to your house. It hadn’t been his bike engine that woke you up, it was his aggressively frantic knocking on your front door. Looking back you were surprised that he hadn’t slammed it clean off its hinges. You were also surprised that you hadn’t tripped and fallen half a dozen times on your way to the front door from your bedroom because your eyes weren’t fully open and you weren’t anywhere close to fully awake.

“Alright, alright!” you half-shouted from your side of the door. You dumbly fiddled with the locks until they came undone.

Angel practically threw himself through the door. He was haphazardly grabbing for you, leaving for you to try and untangle yourself from his long limbs just to be able to close and lock the door again. You’d hardly heard the click of the lock and he was pulling you tight to him. He had his arms wrapped around you in such a way that you couldn’t even effectively hug him back. You just pressed your cheek against his hoodie, helpless to do anything else.

“Talk to me,” you said, managing to free one of your arms so that you could do your best to return his embrace.

He mumbled something into your shoulder, words that you couldn’t make out. He finally pulled back away from you, far enough so that you could see his face, the smears of blood that disappeared into the coarse hairs of his beard.

“It’s all my fault,” the words fell from his lips, raspy and choked as he repeated the sentence over and over again. “It’s all my fault. I, it’s all my fuckin’ fault.”

“What’s your fault, Angel?”

The sound of you saying his name got him to look at you, tears in his eyes and worry creasing his brow deeper than you thought was possible. His stare was so sad, so intense it had you pinned to the spot. Even when he pulled away from you, you felt like you couldn’t step in close to him again, feet glued to the floor. That was when you saw it, though, all the blood standing his palms and fingers.

You swallowed hard, what little exhaustion had still been clinging to you completely froze away. “Angel, talk to me. What happened?”

He looked down at his hands and then back at you. he knew what you were seeing, could only imagine what you were thinking. “I didn’t—it wasn’t supposed to go down like that. I tried to save her but I couldn’t…”

You finally forced yourself to move. You collapsed the distance he’d put between you. “Who?”

“Gaby,” he forced out, shaking his head in disbelief as he did.

Fear shot down your spine. “What?”

“It’s all my fault,” he said again. “I shouldn’t have—I tried to—fuck,” his voice cracked and he gave up on trying to say anything else.

You had wanted more answers in the moment, but back then you hadn’t been able to ask for them. Instead you cleaned him up. You threw his clothes in the wash. You let him slip underneath the covers next to you and keep you wrapped up so tightly for what little was left of the night that you couldn’t even fall back to sleep. The next morning he was still there, eyes hollow as he made a pot of coffee in your kitchen. That morning he was standing almost exactly where he was standing right in front of you now.

Forcing yourself to stay in the present, you finally said, “You know what happened.”

He shook his head. “I don’t.”

“Everyone’s fuckin’ dying, Angel. I, I don’t wanna be next.”

“Hey, come on now. You know I’d never let that shit happen to you.”

You scoffed, more tears spilling down your cheeks. “I’m sure that’s what EZ told Gaby, too.”

Angel flinched at that, immediately deflating. You had never brought it up again after that night. Neither did he. Weeks went by and the two of you seemingly went back to normal, like that entire night had never happened. But it did happen. Gaby was dead—that part you knew. What you didn’t know, what Angel hadn’t told you, was that EZ was the one who had killed her. Angel blamed himself, especially after EZ had told him what his final conversation with Gaby had been, why he had decided it was the only thing to do. Angel was carrying around all that guilt but he hadn’t been the one who pulled the trigger. That was all EZ. That was all the guy who had promised to keep Gaby safe.

His voice was a whisper as he spoke, like he didn’t even fully believe himself. “This ain’t like that, though.”

“But it is,” you said, voice shaking. “Or it will be. That’s what this town, this world,” you rested your hand on the flash stitched into his kutte as you said it, “does. I can’t keep feeling like I’m on borrowed time.”

He sniffled, trying to stuff his emotions back down where he used to keep them so comfortably. “So you’re just gonna leave, then? Run away?”

You knew he wanted an argument. Being angry was so fucking easy. You didn’t want to give into it. “If it keeps me alive, then yes. I lo—” you stopped and switched course, “I care about you, Angel. But I’m not looking to die for anyone. I’m not…I’m not made for this.”

He was holding your face with both hands now, palms that just a few weeks before had been coated with blood. “Don’t leave me like this. Please.”

“Come with me.” It was your final offer, one you hadn’t planned on extending until the words were tumbling out.

He shook his head. “Don’t.”

“Come with me.” You rested your hands on top of his. “Get out and away from all this shit. We’ll start over.”

“It ain’t that simple.”

You threaded your fingers with his. “It is. Pack up your shit and throw it in my truck. And we’ll leave. That simple.”

He pulled his hands away from yours, stepping back from you again. Shaking his head, he brushed his hand quickly across his eyes—erasing any hint of tears and emotion that had been there until then. “I’m not running just ‘cause you are.”

“Maybe you should. Or maybe,” you shrugged helplessly, “maybe it was never about me—not for you, anyway.”

That gave him pause. He tried to get his expression to harden, give that tough, neutral gaze, but he couldn’t get it quite right. “I shouldn’t’a come here.” He shook his head. “Should’a let you run off with no goodbye the way you wanted.”

“Angel—”

He took another step back, getting himself closer and closer to your front door one stride at a time. “Go ahead, then. Get the fuck out—away from this town, away from me. Fuckin’…fuckin’ go.”

He turned on his heel and kept walking. It took a few seconds to will your feet to move, to go after him. Even with his long strides you were able to catch up before he reached the door.

“Angel.” You stepped in front of him. “Stop.”

You saw the mist in his eyes. Still, he tried to keep his voice sharp. “You’re leaving. No point in me staying here to watch you pack up the rest of your shit.”

You opened your mouth to try and say something else, try to conjure up something that would get him to change his mind. He didn’t let you. Pushing past you, he ripped open your door and stormed out of the house. Maybe it was just as well—it wasn’t as though you were going to come up with a magical string of words to get him to leave with you. Still, the impact of his shoulder slamming against yours hurt far more on an emotional level than it did on a physical one.

Turning, you went out onto the step. Your lip began to quiver as you watched him throw his leg over his bike and get ready to peel off. The sound of the engine seemed deafening, and you wonder how it hadn’t woken you on that night weeks ago. Then it got quieter the farther he rode. Then it was silent again. And all you could do was walk back inside to get the next box, leaving the door open behind you.

Angel Reyes Taglist (If you want to be added to any of my taglits, please let me know!): @withmyteeth @garbinge @darqchilddaydreamz @narcolini @justreblogginfics

@winchestershiresauce @rosieposie0624 @kelpies-shed @beardburnsupersoldiers @proceduralpassion

@artemiseamoon @fanfic-n-tabulous @justazzi @danzer8705 @camelia35

@cositapreciosa @choochoo284 @crowfootwrites

#mayans mc #mayans #mayansmc #mayans fx #angel reyes #angel reyes fanfiction #mayans mc fanfiction #angel reyes x reader #angel reyes x you #x reader #x reader fic #my writing #fanfiction #drabblesmc

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dokries · 2 days

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april shower

pairing: wen junhui x gender neutral reader

genre: fluff

word count: 795

warnings: mentions of food near the end, classic kiss in the rain (gone wrong)

author note: this is another repost haha i find it funny that i never posted it in april actually; the first time was the last day of december, and now it’s may already! lots of love <3

masterlist

running ahead of him, you stop under the only street lamp on the street to jun’s apartment that isn’t lit up. as you turn around, your mouth stretches at the edges at the sight of him coming closer and his childlike smile, even as his dark dress shirt—which he had on because you had gone to a fancy restaurant for dinner—was turning a colour similar to how the midnight sky looked in winter thanks to the rain shower that had started as soon as you left the restaurant.

it was april, and the two of you should’ve expected it to rain, but the forecast earlier had said there was a low chance, so you decided to not take an umbrella (oh, how you were regretting your decision now).

“are you cold? i know i gave you my blazer but…” jun’s voice shakes you from your thoughts, hesitation clear in his tone.

with the mentioned fleece-lined garment perched on your shoulders, you shake your head. “i’m fine moonjun! your blazer is very warm.”

“this night feels so…magical, doesn’t it, moon pie?” you ask, moving closer to him. at that moment, to jun, your eyes look even brighter than the night view of the city he saw every night from on the 7th floor (which is saying a lot, considering the light pollution in his area).

“every day is magical with you,” he responds, winking jokingly, though you know he means his words.

sticking your tongue out, you venture out closer to the middle of the road, disregarding all the warnings you had been told by your parents when you were younger. “you know how in most of the movies we watched last week, there was a scene where they kissed in the rain?” you mention offhandedly, reminiscing on the rom-com marathon you had with jun on the comfy loveseat in his living room.

“yes, my love?” jun says, walking fast to catch up with you before you go too far; though there were no cars to be seen this late, he still didn’t want to risk you getting hurt.

turning back to look at him, you snake your arms around his neck, jun’s arms automatically finding their way in a comfortable position around your waist. you give him a lopsided smile before speaking lowly, “we should have our own rom-com moment, shouldn’t we?”

seeing the confused look on your boyfriend’s face, you giggle. “close your eyes, jun!”

once he follows your instructions—not without grumbling about how you never tell him what you’re going to do under his breath, eliciting an eye roll from you—you make sure his eyes are completely closed, and he’s not pulling some sneaky trick on you. once you’re satisfied, you cup his face with your hands, tracing over the small moles all over his face, before placing a prompt peck on his left cheek and taking a step away from his warm arms.

his eyes remain closed for a few seconds, a crease in between his eyebrows forming as time passes before he opens them to see you facing him with a wide, mischievous grin. he lets out a huff of disappointment before rolling his eyes. “come on, that’s not what you’re supposed to do after all that hype!” he whines, grabbing your arm and clinging to your side.

you stare down at him—he’s made himself look smaller so you pity him more, and it works. he looks like a poor stray cat, and the fact that his hair is wet and sticking together strengthens that image in your head.

“aw…my poor meow meow, do you want another kissy kissy?” you tease, faking a pout before giggling at jun’s deadpan expression as he pulls himself away from you.

“…okay, fine.” he starts, looking away from you with a pout. “be that way, and you’re the one who’s gonna have to make hot chocolate once we get to my apartment!” he finishes with a huff—missing the way your eyes turn into hearts at his cuteness.

“well…if you say so. race you home, junnie!” you yell at him before running off, sending your flabbergasted cat-like boyfriend a teasing look: your tongue out and one eye closed, like the emoji he uses ironically all the time. turning back to the goal of the apartment building, you swear you can hear the sound of him running after you—or maybe that’s just the result of the rain picking back up again, dousing both you and jun in water as you run.

sure, you’ll both be shivering once you get to the elevator and grin at each other when you realize you’re dripping water onto the green carpet of the entrance, but when else would you get to enjoy an april shower with the love of your life?

#dokries works #seventeen #seventeen fluff #seventeen imagines #seventeen scenarios #seventeen x reader #moon junhui x reader #moon junhui scenarios #moon junhui imagines #moon junhui fluff #wen junhui x reader #wen junhui scenarios #wen junhui imagines #wen junhui fluff #jun fluff #jun scenarios #jun imagines #jun x reader

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crepesuzette2023 · 3 days

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Hi, I was wondering if you have recs where Paul ignores and freezes John? Thanks a lot!

Thank you for asking, and sorry for being so late with my reply. I hope this is still useful to you.

This is a fascinating request. It made me realize that most fics I know focus on John freezing out Paul (with or without pining)—the reasons for that would probably be worth a separate post. So: challenging ask, thank u very much.

I also kept coming back to the way you worded it—ignores and freezes. That's highly specific, if you think about it! It includes an edge of pain and cold anger, or at the very least something unnatural: a decision to freeze, to numb, to refuse to see the other (Look At Me...).

It also feels final—or, at the very least, final-in-the-moment. How to separate this from fics in which they're broken up, not talking™, misunderstanding each other, are mad at each other (but only as a prelude to making up)...?

Does it also rule out fics in which they're not together, or fighting, or breaking-up-but-still-obsessed...never got together...?

As you can see, I might have been overthinking this, just a tad. :-) But here are some stories that, hopefully, fit your ask to varying degrees.

The wild and windy night (@zilabee) must have been one of the first J/P stories I read, and I guess I memory-wiped just how brutal (and damn good, because: true) it is. This is about mutual attempts at freezing and severing, and brace yourself: it's going to hurt. But it lands in a hopeful place. Cathartic. (Sorry, everyone, for never including it with any of my angst recs; I honestly must have decided to tuck this one away in a specially secured room reserved for the strongest stuff.)

How do you sleep (LouisWain1939) was the first fic I thought of reading your ask. If you want freezing cold, this is it. Prompt-fill for: Paul wanks to HDYS (optional: he phones John as he does it to make John listen). I love it.

you and i have memories (@midchelle). Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind AU. John is the first to opt for the removal of Paul memories, but Paul follows suit. Unfinished, but what a premise—and it's rendered so convincingly...! Treepanning+

open heart (@revollver): Vampire AU. Paul feels ashamed of how much he needs John, and refuses to open up to him. Hot and sensual and sad in exactly right proportions—with an unexpected dark and satisfying ending.

I'm gonna haunt you (sexysadie): 1968. An ice cold conversation between John and Paul in a pub.

Coast Starlight (bookofapril) The best canon divergence of all, in which Paul is happy with Robert Fraser (and, sometimes, Linda) in the 70's, and John is a slightly annoying shadow from the past. John is frozen out in absentia, in a wonderful Paul/Elton John conversation on Fire Island.

The Death of a bachelor (wavesof_joy): Modern AU. Paul gets married in Vegas...and it's too late to elope with John.

Here are two stories centered on the 1966-1967 "Paul refuses to trip with John" era — maybe a bit of a reach for the ask, but I'm thinking: John wants to get in, and Paul appears distant...baautiful, but not quite real...either way, these are both excellent, so enjoy: Sunday Driver (@boshemians; excellent Tara Browne cameo) and Chrysalis (cloudy_blue).

And finally, your ask made me think of two (three?) stories in which Paul freezes out John temporarily for trauma/pain/misunderstanding reasons: Brother Dearest (@javelinbk) and The Cast Iron Shore and its sequel, The Reeperbahn, by @m1ssunderstanding. In the first, John and Paul are stepbrothers as well as lovers. At first, they dislike each other, and later there is a heartbreaking break-up for your ignoring-each-other needs. The second is an AU in which Paul works as a 'rent boy' to support his abusive father, and starts a messy and intense relationship with John, leading them and their band from Liverpool to Hamburg. John and Paul love each other, but do they trust the other loves them back? No. Missunderstandings indeed—deeply painful in places—off the charts pining—and plenty of great Hamburg Beatles in action scenes...!

That's all I can think of for now—perhaps others can chime in with additional recs? (@whenyourbirdisbroken, @crumblingcookies? Tagging you because you have vast fic memories!)

I hope you will enjoy these, anon!

#asks #Paul freezes John out and ignores him fic recs #fic recs #mclennon #mclennon fic recs #mclennon fanfiction

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theficpusher · 2 days

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gotta catch 'em all. | nr | 957 harry takes louis on a pokemon adventure he won't forget.

Gotta Catch 'Em All by punchmelarry | G | 2259 Louis and Harry are distracted by Pokemon Go, just like everyone else. Louis can't believe how little Harry knows about Pokemon, and Harry can't believe how pretty Louis is.

You Teach Me (And I'll Teach You) by teaandtumblr | G | 3615 Zayn is a librarian who takes pride in the Pokemon Gym that is his workplace. That is, until a certain someone starts making a habit of winning it off him every damn day.

Give Me All Of Your Pokèballs by WritingProseAnythingGoes | T | 5309 "What do you mean by 'my house is on a PokeStop'? No, you cannot come in. I don't know who you are. Now please get off my property." Louis bit his lip in frustration. This dude's house was the closest PokeStop he could find and he wouldn't let him even stand close enough to get more balls. "C'mon, please? I can show you how to play too, you'd like it, especially because your house is dead center with the only PokeStop for miles." Louis begged. The guy narrowed his eyes to slits, scrutinizing Louis closely. "How do I know you aren't gonna murder me or some shit?" Louis sighed plaintively. "Seriously, dude, just let me stand in your living room for ten minutes. I won't even move, I'll just stand there, but I swear to God I'm not gonna murder you. Please." or, a short fic where Louis and Harry fall in love because Pokemon Go is a thing.

Of Thunder and Lightning [series] by gmartini | T | 5598 More than just the Pokémon spark up the battlefield when Niall Squared end up in the Pokemon League Championship match.

Take Me To Your Heart by dinosaursmate | E | 6112 Harry blinked at him for a second, and shit, they made eye contact. “Never gonna give, never gonna give…” the man sang, pointing at Harry to sing the next line. “Come on, curly!” Harry wasn’t sure whether or not to indulge him. He just wanted to go back to sleep, but he knew from experience that sometimes, ignoring lively drunks did not make the problem go away. “Give you up.” Harry replied, before laying his head back against the window and closing his eyes. “Yeah!” The man cried, and to Harry’s despair he sat down next to him. “Had a good night?” “I’ve been working.” Harry mumbled, eyes still closed. “Oh. I’ve got a few days off at the moment, so just been out with my mates. I’m Louis, by the way.” --- London Night Bus AU where all Harry wants to do is sleep, but he has a drunk man singing at him.

here's to never growing up by weddingbells | M | 8195 Every year a ship leaves for Slateport City, Hoenn, carrying excited trainers and Pokémon ready for a new world. Louis Tomlinson hopes to be one of them. He just didn't expect the adventure to start as soon as he gets on that ship, but it does.

pokémon au [series] by dearmrsawyer | G | 22177 Harry gets a part-time job at the Pewter City Pokemon Centre to earn some money for his travels and Louis could not be less thrilled. A Pokemon AU featuring OT5 friendship, the ethics of Pokemon training, and a few possible extra-terrestrials.

Just Me, Him, and the Sun and Moon by SadaVeniren | M | 45502 Alola!! You have formally been chosen to participate in the FIRST EVER Pokemon World Championship Tournament. We have not made this selection lightly and have weighed your many years as a master pokemon trainer and pokemon friend in our decision to extend this offer to you! We hope that you will accept our offer and join us at the Hano Grand Resort on Akala Island! The tournament will take place starting on May 15, but we request that you join us on May 13 to partake in an opening ceremony. The tournament will last two weeks, and accommodations will be provided for you and your pokemon, but transportation to the island will not (so bring a flying type!) We hope you join us!! Professor Kukui --- AKA a gratuitous Pokemon AU featuring farmer!harry, professor!louis, paradise, pokemon battles, love, and the fate of the world

#pokemon #gotta catch 'em all.#Gotta Catch 'Em All #punchmelarry #You Teach Me (And I'll Teach You)#teaandtumblr #Give Me All Of Your Pokèballs #WritingProseAnythingGoes #Of Thunder and Lightning [series]#gmartini #Take Me To Your Heart #dinosaursmate #here's to never growing up #weddingbells #pokémon au [series]#dearmrsawyer #Just Me Him and the Sun and Moon #SadaVeniren

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uhyeahnoabsolutelynot · 1 year

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something something tess said “save who you can save” something something ellie and joel couldn’t save the world but they saved each other?

#there’s a coherent thought in there somewhere #look no doubt joel made a complicated decision #he made THE complicated decision hello trolley problem ever heard of it #but it was never not gonna be the decision he made #and that’s not unique to him there are any number of people who would have done the same #which is why this question is so timeless #and in the context of tlou it leads to a vastly more interesting question which is #ok the decision was made. so where do we go from here?#tlou #the last of us #trolley problem: the show #and game #it’s only natural for someone to prioritize someone they care about over a whole bunch of other people #and it’s only natural for all those other people and the people who care about them to be pissed about that #such is life #such is conflict #(personally i find the question of should joel have lied to her more interesting and more fresh hot and ready for debate but)#my stuff

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lameow-l · 5 months

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GAMING IS MY SON AND IF ANYTHING HAPPENS TO HIM IM GONNA KILL EVERYONE IN THIS ROOM AND THEN MYSELF!!

LOOK AT HIM HES SO CUTE

i still have hope in getting the other boys too

its ok they can be a band or smth.. at least then gaming wouldn’t have to be so disappointed in people not hiring him bc he’s just having fun with his boys…

#it took me soooo long to realize his name can also be 'gaming' and idk if i should be ashamed or proud lol #his hashtag is gonna get real funny real quick #is it actually an intentional business decision made by hyv #no way this was accidental #anyway im disappointed in his hair design but i stopped feeling much since all genshin charas always have the ugliest hairstyles #also him being another bennett just not as unlucky #he works so hard and still tries to achieve his artistic dream at the same time #but people just smile and ignore him…PAY THE DUDE!!!#ALSO ALSO.. chiaki 2.0 and they better add all other ryuseitai next #i just can get over how energetic and cool genshin concept designs are when the game keeps slapping us with a downgraded version every time #not to say current designs aren’t energetic or cool.. just not as much lol (still salty about red xiao and those flying nahidas)#now i know why they still not doing an art book yet.. they’re ashamed to admit of the amounts of good designs they never use #AND I LOVE GENSHIN DESIGNS honest (otherwise why would i keep doing fanart of this game and this game only for 3 years)#sorry i dont post all of them.... i have issues #but i cant help but feel robbed when i see these designs knowing what they could’ve been #and it’s in no way hyv’s fault *glance at leakers* and the new designs are getting crazier and cooler but #please for the love of god hyv stop with the mullets PLEASE!!!#gaming #ga-ming #gaming genshin #genshin impact

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patrocles · 10 days

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the thing is i dont think eddie ever actually thought about how he would have to explain to his parents (texan, mexican american catholics) why he chose his best friend (of only a few years by that point and has had more near-death experiences than him no less), to be his son’s guardian in the event of his death over them (his own parents!!) in a way that doesn’t sound gay. like he did all that and was probably like “well if i’m dead i dont have to explain myself” and safely packed it away

#and whats really chemicaling my romance rn is how that act alone was really like the first choice eddie made for himself #choosing buck in SOME WAY #preemptively outting himself to himself through legal documents #but like i dont even think eddie has ever thought about it like that within the context of ALL his life choices never having been for him #like everything he’s done in his life has been for his son or because of expectations put on him by his parents religion and community #and even tho in his mind he can rationalize choosing buck to be chris’ guardian to still being About Chris #and even if it’s still at arm’s length and Not About Him— it’s still eddie choosing buck to be in his life forever #it’s him making a decision that defies the very rational expected decision that his parents would step in as they did when chris was a baby #even if eddie himself would have to not be here for it to go into effect #like its objectively crazy edmundo #bc this is is not gonna make sense to his family at all and ‘he’s my best friend’ is just not gonna cut it #and its a decision he made that’s truly going to require eddie to dig deep and examine what buck truly means to him #am i making sense bc this whole thing rly is batshit crazy when you really think about it #eddie diaz #911 abc

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dhmis-autism · 9 months

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i feel like the original series was red guy centered, the first season was for yellow guy, and i am BEGGING AND PRAYING that season 2 will be more about duck!! i will probably cry if anything happens to him though lol 💀 everytime writers break a comic relief character i just OUGSHGS.. it gets me.

h well I don't think you're wrong about that! Webseries being Red Guys time to shine, S1 of the TV show being for Yellow (esp the last two episodes I think? Even thought outside of that, he does get a lot of focus/he IS the one who talks to the audience the most directly). From what I remember hearing, the pilot was pretty Duck-centered.

But I think even if he GETS his big moment in the sun, so to speak, it's NOT going to be as emotional as the other twos. On top of him just not being a very um… let's say sentimental character, he's just not the make-you-cry type! It's just not him imo!

IDK, I operate under the opinion that… in his weird little head, the most important thing that he values over everything is keeping the three of them together. Both because he thinks of them as a weird little family AND because he really doesn't have anyone else outside of the trio. We also know from the interview, and you could maybe argue from the Family episode ( Who do you love?/Anyone who loves me back., I asked every member of my family who they loved the most, and they all said me ) that being loved is something that he actually values QUITE a bit! More than you would assume on first glance! He's weirdly upfront about it haha!

In that way, I imagine that if they were to TRY to pull something to put him in the spotlight in the way you're imagining (i.e. something emotional and focusing on his issues like they did with Yellow & Red) it would either focus on his desire to be loved OR his dedication to keeping the three of them together. But I would argue they both already did that in the Family episode AND put him through the worst case-scenario in regards to those more emotional aspects of his character ( here I think the worst case scenario to him is the other two rejecting him, harshly, unambiguously and to his face, multiple times and the three of them separating ). AND THE THING IS… THAT ALREADY HAPPENED! THAT DIDN'T BREAK HIM!

He had his little pout over it in his dress and was like FINE! I DON'T NEED THEM ANYWAYS! So, I really don't think that big "character-breaking" moment is coming. If the Family ep didn't get him I honest to God don't think there's anything else the house could throw at him that could get under his skin.

#I REALLY TRULY DO THINK HES JUST GONNA KEEP BEING SILLY AND GOOFY UNTIL THE END OF TIME #just forever in the BG being funny and having the best lines #like. worst case scenario came and went and he is both so adaptable AND deranged that nothing is going to come from it ever #ALSO sorry! i think he likes being in the house lol #dude who loves repetition and stagnation and who is a complete social failure gets trapped in a time loop house with two other people?#of COURSE he loves the routine and delusionally convinces himself that the other two love him!! come ON now!!!#my dhmis postings #like im trying to think of what kind of drama can even come from his specific issues and #its like what if he figures out the other two dont think of him the same way?#HE ALREADY DID!!!#and he pushed on it and pushed on it and didnt relent until they were like PHYSICALLY seperated.#then he just convinced himself that HE made the decision to drop THEM actually.#and when that didnt work he got sad. then got over it.#again. i think he would TRY to find new friends but like. socially he is SO SO fucked lol.#hes annoying. hes loud. he NEVER stops talking. hes super upfront and DOGSHIT at communicating at the same time #hes mean. hes abrasive. he doesnt understand social cues at ALL. he has NO filter. and he refuses to work on any of that because to him #NONE of that is a problem.#like he wouldnt be able to get new friends if he TRIED. he is so completely entirely incompatible to anyone outside the group #it makes him REALLY easy to hate and i get why a lot of ppl do. HELL i get why a lot of IN UNIVERSE charas HATE him

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theoestofocs · 2 years

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but the thing is, melanie hates jon because he is so very much like her.

they work in adjacent fields, they've got such similar temperaments - they both run straight for whatever supernatural horror they need to understand, they both suck at planning ahead (poisoned coffee, melanie?) and they both lash out as a primary defense mechanism - and jon wasn't qualified for his job, and martin's only "degree" was in paranormal psychology, so clearly the Institute was hiring from a broader pool than "qualified archivists." i can't imagine ghost studies are all that lucrative as a field. if melanie hadn't made it as a youtuber, what would she have done? we don't know a lot about her educational background but - she knows what it's like, to need to know. she walked into the Institute and got a job because Elias saw that he could use her.

If she'd had a legitimate encounter sooner, if she'd started her quest a few years early, if she'd come to the Institute to give her statement and stayed to use their library before Gertrude had died -

Or even if she just couldn't survive on a youtuber's salary, if she'd gone looking for job postings in relevant fields -

It could have been her. She looks at Jon, and she sees exactly who she could have been. It's only luck that it wasn't.

And that's the kicker, isn't it? It's luck, that she's in her shoes instead of Jon's.

And is she supposed to feel lucky? To feel thankful that she's had to suffer through attack after attack, Elias showing her how her father (her dad, who called her his little moth) died screaming, her body torn open by things that don't exist, her sense of self slipping as she ripped into flesh with no recognizable form, her trust violated as she woke up to two of the few remaining people who are supposed to be on her side cutting into her against her will - to feel lucky, because she had to gouge her eyes out just to have her body back in her control -

Is she supposed to be happy that she lived through all that? Is she supposed to be glad, just because she could have been Jon?

Nobody told Melanie she needed to feel sorry for Jon, or give him her sympathy, or any other kind of pity. She just wants to give it, because God, what he'd gone through -

(Thank God it wasn't her -)

- Fuck that, she isn't lucky.

She hates Jon, because she refuses to feel grateful for the horror show her life has been. (Because she's grateful, that it wasn't her; and she's furious, because - yes it was. she paid the price of the apocalypse in blood and scars and trauma, too. She wasn't Jon, and could have been - but fuck it, she was still Melanie. and the hell that she has lived through isn't nothing.)

It's just bad luck, that it was Jon of all people. It's just bad luck, that it was Melanie.

No one here is lucky.

#tma #the magnus archives #tma meta #melanie king #linden's originals #i just have a lot of Feelings ok #tangentially related but one of these days i'm gonna write the post abt basira #bc i love to joke abt jon relying on the local lesbians to make good decisions! it is very fun. but also #incredibly inaccurate. jon made bad decisions (mainly due to a dearth of information and a wealth of fear)#but he didn't make better decisions when he let the wlw take charge!#basira was the one who convinced(/coerced? definitely pressured but details beyond that are lacking) jon into performing surgery #on melanie's leg. left to his own devices idk what jon would have done but it sure as hell wouldn't have been #''roofie my coworker to perform nonconsensual surgery''#if only bc that is Not something that would occur to him. & idc man it's a messy situation all around #there was no good choice there (there never was) but that? that wasn't the right one. and i think that's the other piece at play here #melanie didn't forgive him for that. i sure wouldn't. and she gets it - she does: there were no good choices -#but how is she supposed to care about the suffering that guy of all people went through? when it feels like it invalidates her own?#how are you supposed to feel about your reflection in a face that stars in all your nightmare memories?#melanie hates jon because he never gave her a reason to like him; and because he violated her (no matter how necessary it was); and #because she could have been him. because it's luck that it wasn't.#except there is no good luck in this world. not in this apocalypse - the one that's been going on for much longer for her - for them -#than since that final ritual. she's been living an apocalypse since she saw that monster in a hospital. and that matters too.#not one of them has been free in a long time. maybe ever #melanie can't pity him because feeling ''pity'' requires a level of distance she doesn't have #pity means ''there but for the grace of God go -'' but what grace?#there but for the grace of god go i? is she meant to thank someone for giving her the lot she got in life?#how is she supposed to feel glad about that?#she cannot pity him. and she cannot commiserate; those bridges have long since been burned. all that's left to feel #is a guilty kind of hatred and resentment. because in another life she might've been him; in another life still they might have been twins #linden in the tags

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