#but im here laying in bed crying because its just another day of not being able to get out of bed of 9 years of clinical depression | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

absolutelydedinside · 29 days

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Dear Il Dottore,

I love you so much it cannot be contained into words. Even this letter is but a mere fraction of my affection. But I hope it gets the point across!

Every night when I cannot sleep and you're busy with work I imagine you laying next to me, your warm arms feel so real. I imagine you giving me snuggles and kisses. Even if in reality it is a mere delusion, it makes me happy. I care not if it is hurtful to me to love you so much, the happiness I feel with you by my side is something I will never forget nor change. Your existence brings me motivation and strength; something I find slipping from my grasp everyday without you.

In the early hours of the day I love it when I eat with you, even if it is a mere scrap or another tub of ice cream. Having you there with me is comforting. I know i'll never be alone because I have you with me! and i'm here for you as well! No matter what i'll always be here for you! 💕💕💕💕💕 I will be here to make you happy!! 💕

I love it when you tell me about how the serum you injected into patient 67 was a success or how you figured out what the missing component was to a machine. I love you so much Dottore!!!!!!! I feel like crying when you arent with me, even writing this im getting so emotional im.not evem joking.

AAhhhhh I just love you so much !!! I love you eyes, your face, your hair, your wardrobe, your ideals, your inspirations, your smile, and your EVERYTHING!!!! I just love you so much <3 WHENEVER I LOOK AT YOU I GET SO OVERWHELMED !!! I have to scratch and claw at my bed to calm myself down !!!

I love you so much I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU DOTTORE!!!!!!!!!!

I remember you were so happy when I suprised you with that cheesecake for your birthday. You picked me up and gave me so many kisses!! I was so happy. And then for my birthday you made me a giant killing machine 😊 It was the best birthday present EVER!!!!!!!! I still love to snuggle with it!. I even got it a cute pink bow so it could match with you! It's so cute!! (but you're cuter~)

I love all the segments if it wasn't already obvious too!! Even if you cringe at things you did when you were younger, which is pretty funny :3 I love our son babyttore who gets rocks thrown at him!!! I love playing lps with him (he likes pulling them apart but its ok because he puts them back together afterwards) I love snuggling with you and all the segments!!!! 💖💖 YIPPE !!! *jumps around joyfully* I LOVE U DOTTORE!!!

*BEAMS MY AFFECTION DIRECTLY INTO YOUR HEART* *BEAMS MY AFFECTION DIRECTLY INTO YOUR HEART* *BEAMS MY AFFECTION DIRECTLY INTO YOUR HEART* *BEAMS MY AFFECTION DIRECTLY INTO YOUR HEART*

I love you dottore!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you are so silly...... you are silly man :] 💕☺️ I love big spooning because it means I get to feel your soft hair!!!!!! YAY!! I LOVE YOU DOTTORE... You mean so much to me!! YOU ARE SUCH AN AMAZING MAN!!!! A BEAUTIFUL MAN!!! YOU ARE SO ADORABLE AND CUTE!!! I JUST WANT TO SMOTHER YOUR FACE WITH KISSES!!!!! AND I WANT TO HUG YOU FOR ALL ETERNITY!!!!! you hold such a special place in my heart, all my thoughts lead to you. I see you EVERYWHERE!!!! I hear you EVERYWHERE!!! I'm so in love with you Dottore!!!

My dreams, which used to be empty now have you in them, whenever I close my eyes I see you there smiling at me. I love you! you are my everything in life, my sweetie pookie bear kitten. I love being with you every day 💕 you make every day worth it!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE U DOTTORE!!!!!! i love you :3 you are so smart and pretty, you're the prettiest man EVER!!!!!!!!! and I love you!!!!!!!!!!! :]

When im sad I think of you and my day immediately gets better! You bring me so much joy ! you make every day my best day! I love listening to you ramble about your experiments and theories! and I love seeing you happy.

I love kissing you!!! seeing you cute face blush whenever I kiss you makes it so worthwile! I know you think that you don't deserve it, but I will always be here to remind you otherwise! I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU DOTTORE!!!! 💖💖💖💖

I have some other things i'd love to say too but... *giggles* ehe! not here *blushes* thats for private ;) giggles :3 lets just say!! I wanna make whoopie with your cushions! 💖💖💖💖💖💖 *blushes madly* hehehe..... >//////< got a bit too carried away there sorry sweetcheeks <3 lets get back to the more sfw stuff~

You have such a beautiful smile that it rivals the world. Your eyes are like a sunset and your hair is the blue sky. Your smile shines like the clouds which litter the sky and the stars that scatter at night. You're my favorite view. You light up my world.

Even if others throw rocks are you I wont!!!!!! I will shield you from those rocks and bear the pain. I will protect you my princess! I will save you from the evil tower!!! and then I will kiss you 💕 I will give your face kisses.... and then I will kiss your lips!!!! 😊😊😊😊

A world without you feels so far away, the thought of you vanishing is one that brings me pain. I would rather bear the heat of a thousand suns than think of leaving you, my beloved sopping wet beast. I'll stand by your side no matter what!!!!!!!!!!! because I LOVE YOU!

You're so smart and determined that it inspires me to be my best self everyday!!! to not let others bring me down! You bring out the best in me and I bring out the best in you 💖 we bring out the best in each other!!!! We fit together like puzzle pieces 💕 Whenever i'm with you i feel like im drowning in a sea of love and affection, a blue abyss of serotonin 🥰

Your eyes are the same color as that which keeps my body alive, maybe this is why I always find myself getting lost in them. Whenever I think of you my chest feels like its going to explode! my love for you is so strong. Your happiness is my happiness, Dottore 💕 I love your eyes so much!!! they are so beautiful and I love how you get flustered when I compliment them ☺️ you're just so cute when you blush!!! It makes me want to kiss you all over! ♡

The warmth of your body when we snuggle is a comfort I love experiencing every day!! I used to have a hard time sleeping but with you I don't! The love of your embrace never fails to lull to me dreamland at night 🥰🥰 I LOVE YOU DOTTORE!!! I LOVE YOU!!!

You bring me so much happiness, I can't even imagine a world without you!! I would probably be withering in the corner of my room like a dead fly in a fridge (reference to the dead fly that was in my fridge). I would have been turned into tiny little mold particles!! but IM NOT BECAUSE YOU'RE IN MY LIFE!!! :DDD

Ill fight the heavens to save you. ILL PROTECT YOU MY SNUGGLE BEAR!!!!!!!!! I love you so much. Even writing this I feel my cheeks heating up! 😊 and when I hear your voice I feel butterflies in my tummy !!!!! i love you so much 💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕😊☺️😊😊

I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOY I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOY I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOY I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOY I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOU 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

Ahhh! so joyous!!

Love, Absol ♡

#love letter for my babygirl #absolposting #long ass post because im a normal person in society #long post #yumejoshi #love letters 2 dottore <3

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ceruleansx · 1 year

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nightmares | peeta mellark

↳ peeta mellark x reader

↳ warnings : mentions of past trauma, FLUFFFLUFF

↳ summary : its after the games, and you woke up from a horrifying nightmare. luckily, peeta was there to help you.

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first thing you noticed after you screamed at the top of your lungs was that you were in a mess. your hair was stuck to your forehead, from all the sweat. the blanket was on the floor. it was a mess.

you never really quite remembered a night without having a nightmare, but none compared to this one.

it was back to the games, where you had to kill someone because of rue.

and on top of that, the wound on peeta's leg got the best of him and made him weak. his weakness then made cato kill him. in front of you. you felt like you were trapped to the ground, not being able to save peeta in enough time.

that was your one true goal in life. to protect peeta.

you heared sudden and fast footsteps coming towards your room, causing your breath to slow down a little bit.

the door rushed open, only to find peeta panting, with the most worried look on his face. without even any words, he rushed towards your bed and held out his arms.

once you saw that, you immidietly started to break down and cry into his arms. this comfort was never felt with you, especially peeta. yet, his hugs were so warm and safe.

"peeta- i-" you sniffled, not being able to finish sentences.

"i saw you d-die and~ i couldn-n't save you..." with that sentence alone made you cry even more.

"hey, hey, shhh" he started to rub your back and head, "your safe, im here.."

you pulled away, wanting to look at his face. his neck was wet from your tears, but he didn't even mind.

"those dreams are just dreams, okay sweetie? look, im right here..." he patted his chest. "the games are over, you have nothing to worry about."

you couldn't help but smile. god, he was the best person ever.

"once we get home, we won't have to worry about anything. hey, we can just bake and paint all day."

he smiled, and you two kept eye contact for which seemed forever.

"can you..." you whispered, breaking the comforting silence.

"stay with me? please...?"

his eyes softened and it looked like that he's been waiting for that question for years.

"of course baby, cmere."

the nickname threw you off, yet you like it.

peeta layed down first, and opened his arms for you to lay down on. his embrace was so warm and welcoming, you wanted to stay there forever. his arm draped over your shoulder, as your hand interlocked with one another.

his thumb rubbed small patterns on your hand, and you couldnt help but feel butterflies in your stomach.

how the heck did he make you feel this way?

he managed to kiss the top of your head, embracing your beautiful lavender smell. you took a big breath, enjoying the sound of peeta's heartbeat. the last thing you heard him whisper before faling asleep was,

"i love you.."

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marytudorr · 4 months

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Ok ok ok stick with me for this one bbg

Being from 2023 and finding lestat, loui and claudia kinda dead but not really, you nurse them back to health and they are like:

Louis: i will protect you with my life bestie🧍

Claudia: my sister 🫂

Lestat: so would you like to touch lestat junior over here in the south region 🙂

But they would take you to live with them and you would bcs... They are filthy rich... Have you seen louis house in the modern days

They would keep going like everything is fine and eventualy you get a bf... Boy lestat does not like that...

He would very much try to seduce you

-walking naked when you two are alone in the house

-taking baths with the door wide open

- his hand on your waist at all times

-going to your room at night amd may or may not bite you

If all of that fails, he might do what he did with louis, give you a full speech of how your hearts are dancing, getting closer and closer to you until you eventualy have sex.

When its all done and if you dont touch the subject, he will be fine with that because it got you to stay and will probably tease you

( your insistence on not giving him the relationship he craves with you gets him hot and bothered 💀)

If louis found out: i think he would be mad at lestat only because he knows how manipulative he is

If claudia found out: he is dead, you are her soul sister, the only person to show her true kindness, her job is to do the same

I LOVE THEM

First of all, “Lestat Junior” IM CRYING

Second of all, Lestat thinks he’s so smug and stuff, he thinks he can get anyone he wants but really it’s you who has the power, he’s literally your bitch.

If you don’t give into the teasing I think he would be so desperate for you(leading to the speech), he may even beg on his knees, sob into your clothes and give you the most pleading eyes (I may have to write this). He’d do anything to get you into his bed(coffin) and it shows.

But if you gave into your desire for him, oh lord, the brat prince™ would be so cocky, even brattier of possible. He’d tease you mercilessly in bed, not letting you come over and over again then once you do, making you cum over and over again(I’m writing this).

Either way you’d have sex with him, and when Louis find out, he’d definitely be fuming with Lestat, he’d curse him for ruining everything with your boyfriend (not that he likes him that much) and manipulating you, he’d feel sorry for you though, that your relationship has been ruined and that your a victim of Lestat’s seduction.the fight wouldn’t last long though due to Lestat’s ways to calm Louis down ;).

Claudia on the other hand, takes fuming to another level, she loves you with her whole dark heart and would rather walk outside in the day than let Lestat lay his hands on you. She’d scream at Lestat and throw things (as Claudia does) even having a go at Louis for trying to defend Lestat. All of this happening while you just stand to the side deciding how to break up with your boyfriend, obviously wanting more of Lestat.

#interview with the vampire #iwtv #lestat de lioncourt #lestat smut #lestat x reader #the vampire lestat

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xo-urban · 1 year

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Hi, it's me! I wanted to request another Price fic because I don't see much of him being written here and I really liked how you did him.

This is the request! Price with M!Reader who wakes up from a nightmare (You can decide if they're part of 141 or not) and Price is comforting him and stuff. Sorry if this is random but I hope you find what you can do with it! If you don't take it that's fine too no pressure!

Also, have a good day/night!

IM SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG MY FRIEND 😭😭

You’re Safe

Pairing: John Price x Male Reader

Summary: You had a nightmare and Price helps you through the night.

Warnings: Not much but it’s comfort and fluff all the way.

Word Count: 1025

It was absolute hell for you, despite being here and breathing.

Recently you had been rescued from the gulag a little too late, of which you fought and saw the horrors that seemed to haunt you even after you’ve left.

Even after it all, you made it, you fought and you killed, battled and bruised, despite being a strong guy who could handle himself pretty well, it didn't mean you always came out scotch free. Your boyfriend, Price, swore to protect you after that, seeing how scared and vulnerable you looked after leaving there.

It’s been days and you’re still paranoid from it, here you were, laying down in the comfort Price provided, getting your hair cleaned and your body rubbed down in a nice intimate bath.

It’s nice to have them every now and then, it was relaxing the way Price massaged your scalp, caressed your shoulder blades from behind with gentle hands, it was like he was handling glass.

You enjoyed the pampering, feeling Price rinse your hair before pressing a soft kiss to your nape. You chuckled softly at the feeling of the man’s beard tickling your skin. “Water’s getting cold my love.. wanna get out and get some rest?” Price peppered soft kisses to your neck, watching you smile.

“With you, anything my love” You replied as you got off him, standing up with the help of the tub sides before stepping out and helping your man up as well. Price thanked you lovingly, taking the back of your hand and kissing it gently before he grabbed a towel and wrapped the two of you up.

You went to your room, putting on a thin shirt, your boxers and some shorts before settling on one side of your bed that you shared, waiting patiently for your boyfriend to get in with you.

Price laid down next to you, taking your body into his strong gentle arms while you snuggled up against him. You smiled as you felt his lips against your forehead, leaving a soft kiss.

You yawned, leaning up towards his lips and kissing him lazily, your legs finding themselves tangled between one another. Price’s hands found their place caressing your waist while you held him close with your arms gently massaging the man’s back.

“Sleep now my love.. I’ll make you breakfast the next morning this time alright?” Price coaxed you gently, his hand finding its way to your hair, massaging your scalp while brushing fallen strands behind your ear.

You found yourself relaxing into his safe haven, eyes growing heavy with all the touch. Each second more weight could be felt on your eyelids before you eventually let them fall shut, lastly seeing you man so happy and calm was truly something perfect that you could take in.

The darkness that loomed welcomed your tired body into a deep slumber, you drifted upon dreams and wonders till your dream bloomed to life.

You were in a cell, a familiar one with blood stained walls as you heard the cries and screams of other men, soldiers begging and crying out in pain while gunshots and grenades sounded through the pit.

This couldn’t be.

Not again.

You panicked as you went to stand, the chains bounding your wrist dag into your skin, tearing it slightly open but enough for blood to rise up and out.

You found yourself running in a matter of seconds down hallways with stinging risks, it was almost like these were just glimpses of what you remember. Your legs buckled beneath you, your arms stung, everything felt sore.

The building shook but it was violent, you don’t remember this happening. The walls began to crack while the roof above you crumbled, the floor rattled as pieces of the roof began to fall.

You ran and ran but the hallway seemed endless, the further you ran, your surroundings became more restless, till a large piece of the roof fell right on top of you, you watched the large debris fall and fall till-

“Love!”

You woke up, gasping for breath as Price was quick to sit you up, taking you into his arms as you gripped tightly on his shirt to stabilize yourself.

“Hey hey.. it’s okay, you’re here, safe my dear” Price whispered, you shook as you realized you had begun to cry from the distressful panic.

You let out a sob you didn’t know you’d been holding back as Price held you tightly to his chest, telling you to take breaths to stable your breathing.

“Hush my love.. it’s okay.. nothing ain’t gonna hurt you as long as I’m alive” Price hushed, kissing your tears as you loosened your hold on him, sighing.

The two of you continued to hold each other till you finally pulled away a bit, looking up to meet Price’s worried gaze. He took a hand to wipe your tears before kissing you ever so gently.

You sighed, leaning your body against your strong man as he swayed the two of you side to side a little, helping you calm down more.

“Was it that bad?” Price asked softly, his hands rubbing your back as you nodded. You let your head rest on his shoulder, a small hesitant smile on your face.

“It was me, back in the place you know..? Price it still haunts me, I don’t ever wanna go back” You whispered, moving your head to the crook of his neck, your hand still holding onto him.

“And you won’t. Ever my love. I swear to it, you’ll be safe, far away from it” Price promised, kissing your temple before moving to lay the two of you back down again.

He threw the covers on again, hiding you in his arms while you sighed contently, knowing that now, you could rest without worry. With Price beside you, nothing could hurt you while you slept, not even the nightmares that haunt you.

You were about to bid Price good night but you were interrupted by a loud snore, leaving you to chuckle to yourself before you kissed his jaw, falling into a comfortable dreamless sleep this time, knowing you’re safe.

#fanfic #fanfiction #male reader #modern warefare 2 #john price x male reader #captain price x reader #captain price x male reader #cod x male reader #no beta we die like men

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little-nugget-writes-stufff · 1 year

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(No original idea, (like the idea of the characters having control over your phone)

What if the people (playable characters) had acces to our phone?

U got games on ya phone? Those are not yours anymore the kids and itto have claimed them as theirs

-klee is probably playing angry birds or sum-

Oh wait HOLD TF UP YOU DONT WANNA GET OUT OF BED?? ye paimon is turning on the alarm sound (wich not suprisingly is her voice. But you had different lines no? Did someone change it?)

"GET UP YOU...

Ehm traveler do you think i can call them a nickname?

-aether shakes his head-

"JUST GET UP ALREADYYYYY"

A presentation is suddenly done without you doing it? How strange. Must be ganyu? Ye

"oh their grace has an economy presentation? Well maybe it would take some stress off their back, im sure they still have plenty of other work to do"

Most of the smart people (albedo tighnari etc) use it for their research. I mean they can learn so many things (if you spoke another language i think a lot of them would try to learn it)

"oh so these are flowers from their world? Hm interesting i wonder what these plants can do, maybe when their grace is here i could ask them"

Suddenly new playlists have been popping up. Wondering who did it? Well the culprits are probably venti and xinyan taking the oppertunity to listen to your worlds music.

Suddenly venti is playing soldier poet king on his lyre

Also random pictures? Of the MOST random things in tevyat.

"Oh wait why tf do i have a picture of an anemo slime? Wait i did not take this? Eh whatever i probably just forgot"

Ah what is this, the things you liked on Tumblr? Yae Miko now is in charge of that (Poor you) +bonus if you write yourself)

Oh? So this is what their grace likes to read huh?

Would probably also make light novels inspired by the things you read

Would keep the things you read a secret tho for teasing inspiration ofcourse

When you finaly fall asleep (lets say the phone lays next to you) some will just go up to the screen and say goodnight (like their in the screen)

(favorite character) goodnight your grace..

Or when someone in your class is making fun of you and you speak up THEY WILL FCKING CHEER FOR YOU (ofcourse you dont hear this bc of the class being loud asf (i have childe in mind haha)

-all the yelling between you and this person-

YESSSS GET THEM YOUR GRACE

Oh you should see the pride on his face

On the other hand when they hear you cry they will fcking panic. I mean they really wanna help you but they cant because of the barrier in between

"WHY CANT WE CHEER UP THEIR GRACE?! THEY SHOULDNT WASTE THEIR TEARS"

"as far as we understand your concerns but we will have to wait until the time is right"

Ye there is utter chaos between the people

When you have to make school work online its randomly made for you? Huh i guess dottore wanted to see what you always have to do

"oh wait i think i still had some chemistry homework"

-sees the work all done-

"Wtf, i didn't make it before? Eh maybe someone else made mine on accident. Well too bad for them"

Also lets not talk about the random number that randomly texts you haha (PLEASE YOU DONT GET IT WHY DO THEY KEEP SAYING "your grace")

They have all sort of agreed to not tell you that they have access to this... Weird Artifact, until your finaly in tevyat.

Please dont be mad at them once they do, they put in so much effort.

I dont understand yall anymore so here, have this. The things i expect to do wel do absolutely not and just random drabbles get so much likes, like what?

Anyways have a nice day/night :D

#sagau headcanons #genshin sagau #sagau cult au #genshin impact

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pumpkinsy0 · 8 months

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idk how to describe this post, but just describing characters psyche lol

darry,dally, and tim- they have little to no genuine support system and have to harbor everything they go through pretty much alone and bottle shit up cause growing up quickly sucks

tim- his parents werent rlly parents, so he had to emotionally mature fast and understand what they did wrong in life and in having kids so that he could better take care of angela and curly, he learns quickly that looking out for ur own blood can save ur skin more than yknow it, his parents arent around rlly anymore and he doesnt exactly know where they run off to even if they come back home for a few days but he knows theyll never learn that

angela- she canonically had a break down about her life being actual dogshit and bryon says that in the morning she’ll go back to her own stone cold strong self cause thats just the way she is, that's just the way she's learned to go through life

literally every singular one of the characters LMAOOO- its self explanatory HOWEVER i will highlight darry here

curly- faces a shit ton of oppression (even if u dont agree w him being queer hes still black to me but if u dont see him as black hes still a poc and a greaser) so hes just learned to do whatever he wants bc no matter what he does hes always gonna b judged so y not live life to the fullest and in a way that makes him happy, he’ll still be shunned, but at least he’ll be happy

tim- i cant properly find the words to explain it, but someone needs to check up on this nigga fr, a good portion of the neighborhood is religious, especially the older ppl yet they always judge him for one thing and another, nobody is rlly genuinely hoping (or in this case praying) he gets better

curly- shameless reminder that i ship purly, so I thought about curly saying this to pony for a sec cause i think cures that type guy to just explore the world any way he wants and he'll do anything to get someone to join him in on it

this is also for very obvious reason two bit, soda and if u squint, steve

darry- he cares for pony sm it comes off to pony that he doesnt care at all, pony needs his space to breathe and darry doesnt wanna let em go

the shepards but most particularly angela- for some reason she held her parents in a high light cause unlike some kids in the neighborhood they had them both, curly and tim knew this wasn't rlly the case very quickly and as angela grew up, bit by bit she knew what they meant and would lay or even cry in bed over it

TAKE AWAY THAT THESE R COUSINS PLS ONLY PAY ATTENTION TO THE WORDS THATS WHAT IM TRYNNA HIGHLIGHT HERE IM BEGGING U

purly- either way u chose who's who the other has always felt like they weighted other ppl down (for ponys case) or like theyre just to far gone to be helped (for curlys case), they still love each others company because they see the other as being worth it/deserving of it

however if u dont ship purly or can't get over em being cousins this is literally darry and pony or johnny and pony for like the same exact reason

#curly shepard #ponyboy curtis #purly #tim shepard #angela shepard #darry curtis #sodapop curtis #dallas winston #darrel curtis #two bit mathews #johnny cade #steve randle #the outsiders fandom #the outsiders hcs #the outsiders headcanons #the outsiders 1983

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panoramaofhell · 22 days

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ive kind of always passively been somewhat unhappy at my job anyways primarily due to pay( but its never truly bothered me until the way i was treated today and now ive never wanted to quit more than i do now. i have to go tomorrow for like the fourth fucking eleven hour day in a row and i am absolutely dreading it after todays experience. i am laying in bed unable to sleep because the panic attacks in my chest wont stop. im so congested from crying for the last five fucking hours. my face stings. my nose and lips burn. im so dehydrated and i haven’t felt good in several days. I haven’t been eating every day, which is not like me. ive never gone off food willingly, only when im sick and even then. I just want to disappear. im at the lowest point ive been in my life in many years and im barely hanging on by a thread. i can’t get ahead. i can’t get away from my abusive father and being a slave to his side of the family . im stuck here until i inevitably kill myself because it’s not if at this point it’s when. i absolutely will hold it together for my mom but i cant help but wonder how much more abuse i csn take when im already down as it is. i really don’t want to suffer. I thought I was doing ok before i caught my “long term boyfriend” cheating on me again (i mean, i guess he never really stopped since the first time) but then that happened and yeah it’s like ripped back the curtain of the placebo. or something like that. basically im so fucking tired of being alive, i feel worthless in every way humanly possible about everything i do, say, think, or touch and i feel like no one takes ne seriously except the handful of online friends i have that i hate to constantly burden. i dont want anyone to actually hurt or feel bad because of my own actions, I just want to like go to sleep and peacefully not wake up,but without hurting or affecting anyone else’s lives in the process. but that’s not possible. so here ill toss and turn another night until i wake up tomorrow just to do all of this again.

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atinyniki · 4 months

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teaser 'good enough' : one.

background info: main character is maya. aalia is maya's little sister. maya and aalia sleep in the same bed. HUGE TW.

a/n: this is kind of very sad btw... its not a fanfic though ! its a story. i hope the finished product will be as good as my actual fics.

teaser wc: 890

TW: suicidal themes, mentions of abuse, trauma, neglect, mentions of a miscarriage, loss of a loved one

two decades later, yet everything has changed. maya’s grown a lot now, trying her best to use her trauma for good.

she’s become mildly successful with her writing, but as time went on, she’s lost motivation.

she’s lost the support of her family. she’s lost her friends. and now it feels like she’s lost the one thing that makes her happy.

so she thinks about it. for the first time since seventh grade, her sick mind puts those terrible thoughts into her head. no one wants her, so why is she here?

she walks into the bathroom, the one she’s used for the past four years, looking for something. just something that could help her do this.

until she’s called for bed.

aalia yells out for her, so she stops herself, stepping into the bedroom after getting ready. she wants to leave, but she can’t.

but it would be so much better without her, wouldn’t it?

they both lay down in the bed, but maya makes a mistake. a mistake that she has made one too many times, clearly. aalia slaps her in the face, unamused by mayas stupid attempt to ‘tickle’ her.

but it was truly unintentional. she couldn’t say anything else, only shutting herself up and laying down.

and she thinks about it once more, ending it all. but this isn’t right. so she takes out her phone, typing out a number into her search engine.

988.

she clicks on the chat option, filling out the required information. and then she gets a response.

his name is asher, she finds out.

this is crazy, why had it even gotten up to this point? asher asks what’s wrong, as his job entails. and then it all pours out.

that’s okay though, right? isn’t that the point of this entire website?

minutes pass, and mayas already started crying. she tries her best to hide it for her sisters sake, but these messages aren’t helping at all.

and then she confesses. she confesses something she has never confessed before. something she had never even thought about until now.

maya: in 2007, my mother was due for a baby boy. he was stillborn. his name was manik. when she told me, i felt guilty. i felt guilty for giving my mother all these complications, so many that she couldn’t bear another child. she had always wanted a boy. maya: in fifth grade, i made a journal dedicated to him. i’d talk to him every single day through there, just to tell him how sorry i was that i couldn’t be enough. and how i know that he’d be so much better than who i am now. maya: i think it’s changed me a lot, even though i didn’t think about it until now. every time i don’t live up to my parents’ or sister’s standards, i just feel guilty. i don’t know how to deal with myself anymore.

yes, that was a lot to get out. but it’s something she has never gotten out before. of course there’s going to be a lot of hidden feelings about it. she didnt even know how much it was affecting her until she spoke about it.

asher: im sorry this is being placed on your shoulders. you don’t deserve that. it’s hard to walk in someone’s shadows all the time.

and the words from fifth grade come back to maya. she thinks about what her mother said after she found the journal. no comforting, of course not.

‘you’re a good writer’

and she is, which is why she started her blog in the first place. but over the holidays, she’s lost motivation. that’s not okay.

writing is the only think that makes maya feel like she’s worth it. so what will happen now that she’s lost the one thing that makes her happy?

maya: my mom read the journal one day, because i failed to hide it. instead of comforting me, she told me that i was a good writer. and i believed her. i started writing on a blog about things id like in life, something i hadn’t thought much about before. i love writing a lot. maya: but now it’s just so scary. i’ve lost all my motivation. i’ve lost my ability to do the one thing i love and now i feel worthless. i’m nothing without my writing, without my ideas.

then comes a sudden wave of sadness, something she’s never felt experienced before. not because of this.

asher only does his job, comforting her through this process. maya is grateful for him of course, he’s an amazing person. then, asher suggests something.

asher: maybe you could try writing as a way to get these feelings out? it helps to you to journal some things, in case you have no one else to tell.

and then it hits her. an idea. motivation.

asher gives her some resources, and she finally ends the chat about twenty minutes later. she opens her files, quickly checking the screenshots of her conversation with asher.

she thinks about what to write, what she should name it. and then she thinks about herself. who is she?

who is she to her family, her friends, the world? and then she figures it out. she’s the girl who will never be worth it.

she’s the girl that will never be good enough.

#nikiupdates

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r4gg3dy4ndy · 1 year

Text

more brain soup-y ideas but they arent just about henry and they are nsfw

by the way - if you guys want me to write one of these shoot me an ask and ill make it. same with the other post btw

thinking about ghost billy just the parameters of that

I mean not really my thing but public sex would be so easy yk like lets say you are in like a bathroom stall or smthn and you guys are just… fucking but no-one can see or hear him but you ughehruhg

UHGURHRGHH hear me out on this but like possession?????? Him controlling your body or smthn????? AUGH WHAT IF HE DOES THAT AND UR LIKE DATING STEVE OR SMTHN AND HE TAKES OVER YOUR BODY AND YOUR LIKE…. HELPLESS TO STOP HIM???? TELL ME THATS NOT HOT RIGHT?????? LOOK ME IN THE EYES AND TELL ME ITS NOT.

if i said i would fuck hopper what would you guys think of me

hey look listen i get it maybe not the most conventionally attractive stranger things character but listen

i feel he could be really sweet and loving when he wants to be yk maybe like just sweet soft sex i would make the pleading face emoji like perfect recreation watch me

augh uauuughhghrr but like also angry mean sex w/hopper?????? losing my damn mind im tellin ya yk

aurugurhrrggg like imagine he had like a really long day or smthn and he comes home and just takes his frustration out on you but like after sweet aftercare and hrehriueherrj

OR maybe hes like in russia and you are being held there too and maybe you like get in a fight with your old cellmate or something [hypothetically - it doesnt look like they have cellmates but for the sake of me bloody imagine will ya youve got the brain for a reason] and they like transfer you in with hopper and whatnot and i mean hes obviously pent up [with stress not sure about the balls idk how they work help] and shit during russia fucking duh right and i mean you seem so sweet being sent there for a silly silly reason [being gay and or trans or like wrongfully incriminated] and he just needs something to get some of that stress some of that anger out on and well you get where im going 😉

sorry about having another thing about him but this is a different circumstance i swear anyways domming billy

look im not the worlds most dominant guy look at me but ive got my times yk i could be if i wanted yk and maybe just like oh idk tying him up and teasing him relentlessly yk simple things

or or or once again tie him up mostly because i highkey doubt he would be willing to sub like maybe in concept he would but when it happens hes pissed but then just like… treating him really nice like really softly? just being really soft to him i think he would physically melt tbh

like just kissing him all over and just being really soft to him so that he knows hes safe and loved just being like a service top or whatever and just showing him you care and just just just

do you see where im going do you see what im saying

on another note maybe like really rough domming him without tying him up

im sorry im listening to this audio that deadass sounds exacttlyy like him its scary and its just like his character and im dead laying in my bed whoops

but like seriously just like absolutely commandeering him making him obey n shit like you might be fighting for your life but you are also winning

like it might take some persuasion some fighting for dominance but once you win lordy lord

aughhh he would be on his knees for you and after a while he would start secretly enjoying himself

like duh hes gonna be a brat but fuck once you tame him its wild im tellin ya

some of the stuff in my brain rn im not sure if i should write down lmaoaooarhrhar

not really part of this but i think hed cry during sex

uhh eddie just uuhhyehreuhre him <3

uhh eddie after like a dm session and hes still in character you can see what im starting at here

like hes still all commandeering n shit and he just kinda expects you to obey and yk normally you would but you feel like playing a bit yk a tad of cat and mouse never hurt anybody right

well at least not in the moment but the day after sure

im getting ahead of myself tho

so anyways he starts commanding you yk pushing you around and you decide to not just listen and obey blindly

you play coy n shit and he is just not having it yk

the party were all being a bitch collectively earlier too so hes already a little pissed off yk right

and i mean you didnt know you thought “oh there he goes again my silly ol boyfriend what if i messed around with him a bit wouldnt that be fun”

yeah noooo

no yeah noooo

i mean yeah, it was fun but now you have rope burn all over your body, bruises, bite marks, a bit of blood, and your [insert reproductive organ of your choice as well as hole here] was entirely sore + you could barely walk

uh uh uh uh fuck he survived uhh uhhhh but hes a vampire UHMM UH UHHHMMM

LOOK I SWEAR IM FUCKING RIGHT OK VAMPIRES ARE SEXY AS FUCK BRO

like you think hes dead yk your all sad and hiding in your house from the rift deadass right in the street to your house and one night as your sleeping he comes out of that rift and breaks into your house just watching over you as you sleep

these were unfinished and i kept em all in a google doc so expect more than one of these btw also i wrote these to send to a friend so if they dont sound like me normally then sorry

#billy hargove smut #billy hargove x reader #hopper stranger things #hopper x reader #accidentally typed hoppy instead of hopper whats wrong with me help #eddie munson #eddie x reader #eddie munson smut

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pinkseas · 1 year

Note

[parasocial bestie] boutta send another ask before you can answer the previous ones.... bro girl (gnc) do you ever think about xiao post-teyvat... after lumine leaves..... like ive took an entire night just hours laying on bed once just to rot my brain on what's gonna happen after all that stuff i told u abt his ideal endinfg and shit i dont remember hhUEHAHAHAHGH BUT LIKE, THE CORE OF IT ALL that he learns and remembers lumine's words to heart; and there's the extra bit i said perhaps, on that time he won't have someone who had made his life a little better, no longer by his side, he would try to delve in a curiosity he had thrown away before. the desire to seek something new, something he used to have, put aside in priority for duty, and that he's not meant to indulge things like other living things do.

i love the thought that xiao takes the step of being in lumine's shoes, not entirely, but the mere concept of being a traveler. a wanderer. someone who's simply curious, who wants to explore what they've never seen. this is a life lumine is at her finest, other than the responsibilities she's weighed to. xiao would just want to Try and feel her experience. he'd leave liyue if only for a few days, still clinging to the thought of,... home? liyue finally felt like home than a place he's obligated to protect. and that's thanks to lumine too. his travels progress with ease with his own form of teleportation through the permit of wind, and he settles to visit,.. places. landscapes, nature,- to meet the people can wait later. for now, he's only here to explore and just... be.

it latches at the very center of my brain for weeks about post-traveler concepts like this like i DONT dig and do not like just outright Despise a xiao that misses lumine to the Extreme, someone to cling onto, because it defeats the purpose of him who's meant to be free and being able to choose. it doesnt mean anything about him forming attachments and loyalty, although hes still loyal to lumine in regards he sees her as a dear friend who taught him so much about life, the life he has and that he should cherish it. and he does, and will try, with all these little steps of moving forward without the hand that pulls you along. the people who cared for him who had been the hand that pushes along, will still push, but now all of his actions are made on his own volition. i just love that. i love that after lumine, he starts to live again. he slowly, but surely, know how to live.

so first of all "bro girl (gnc)" fucking SENT me im gonna cry why is that so funny to me i love that so bad

and second of all okay ngl i dont think about it OFTEN but i do. think about it. i Absolutely Do Think About It. and the way you've described it is flawless i have nothing to expand upon nothing to add no little comment to make im just. speechless. delving into the curiosity he had thrown away before. becoming a traveler, a wanderer. meeting people coming later, for now focusing on exploring, on seeing all that the world has to offer. still regarding lumine as such a dear friend. his actions being his own. learning how to live again. im going to lose my MINDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD.

not getting too close to mortals at least for a while at first, too wary of the pain he's caused them before, too aware of the degree to which he will outlive them (those from the chasm are exceptions, and he'll remember them for centuries after they're gone, even if only in fleeting thoughts). but meeting some of the other archons. becoming closer with other adepti. a small circle, but a circle nonetheless. <- cannot stop thinking about xiao and nahida eventually becoming friends dorry i had to say SOMETHING. its hard to imagine him and the wanderer as Friend friends, but i can see them crossing paths sometimes if they hadn't already met through lumine, realizing fairly early on that neither of them are human, working together pretty well whether in fighting or simple exploration. sharing a sort of wonder at the world, a deep will to be better, knowing what its like to exist solely for one purpose and knowing more still of what it's like for that purpose to leave them, to be taught how to exist without it, to further learn themselves how to exist without it. idk. very different people but a solid few similarities in their lives. xiao albedo friendship i hope i pray at least eventually idk i think they'd just Vibe.

still thinking about xiao and nahida as friends. xiao knowing a lot about various plant life and taking care of it, nahida teaching him the rest and filling in the gaps when he asks. learning how to sew. learning how to best care for the wildlife. learning how to use his hands gently. they're rough and calloused and for so long they existed to wield his weapon, nothing more, but now they make messy stitches and pat down the dirt around freshly planted flowers and ever so carefully pet the stray cats he sees in different cities. xiao is not a weapon. maybe he never was.

idont even know where my train of thought is anymore im just. im just. im just. o(-(

#xiao handshake scara handshake collei #being SO very on my mind these past few days specifically in terms of learning how to live again #its always about learning how to live again with me i swear #parasocial bestie tag

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marvelnatswhore · 1 year

Note

Awh darling :( its okay to feel that way, i know school and work can be extremely tiring and its okay to feel that way. im glad tomorrow is your day off and if you're too exhausted to go o the trip, you should tell your mum that you want to rest and that you guys can go on a trip another day! Im sure she'll understand, and if you do want to go on the trip but you're tired, you should try sleeping lots today, or if you travel with a car tmrw, you should sleep in the car if ur mum drives! Its okay that u said things you're not proud of darling, we are all human<3 -- and you should be resting lots and taking care of your health, both physical and mental. I wish i can be with you rn, to comfort you and hold you :( i know its really hard rn pretzy, its hard for me rn too, but we'll be okay, yeah? It'll get better, and even if it doesnt, i will be here. I'll be here for you, and i'll always be here. Take care, pretzy, dont overwork yourself :( its okay to take breaks, i promise. I love you, i hope you'll feel better soon👾💗 (try cookies? :0 or some comfort food? And try relaxing, lay on ur bed, cuddle w pillows and comfy blankets, tea/coffee on ur bedside table, and slow music playing in the background?? sometimes being comfortable makes me feel better, i hope it'll work for u too! Or try watching comfort movies or shows?? :D) take care, love <3

-💍💍💗🌹

you made me cry :")

thank you my lovely this is so sweet <3 i went on the trip and it was nice even if i didn't feel great for the morning, i have work all tomorrow but i might have a day off next week to just sleep or relax and hopefully write because i've had no time to do that and it's been adding to my mood lately :') 💞

how are you tho love? :( you never talk about yourself and i want to hear how you are too <33💗

#💍 anon #love u #asks #ring anon <3

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titsuya · 2 years

Text

# HQ BOYS THAT LIKE AN4L

only the best boys like it <3

starring: it’s a surprise!

warning: ANAL !! heavy degradation in atsu’s and omi’s, hesvy praise, butt plugs, surprise anal, size kink bc duh, mentions of breeding and corruption, shitty writing (again sorry lol) MINORS DNI 18+

sar’s note: I HAVENT POSTED IN 10 YEARS IM SO SORRY. also i love the concept of this so if u dont like it, sorry !! i know its not for everyone D: not proofread and i went way overboard in haji’s, my bad <//3 (also i definitely know more boys who like anal so i might do a pt. 2 !!) kk enjoy <3

[ navigation (18+) ]— [ send an ask ] — [ masterlist ]

USHIJIMA WAKATOSHI

i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again. toshi has a thing for size difference (and corruption but that’s for another day). his size kink is off the fucking charts when one day he realizes that you have two holes for a reason.

your bent face down, ass up and he’s about to fuck your cunt full of cum. (#1 breeder). but,,, he notices your puckered hole squeezing tightly around nothing and his entire being just throbs. the thought of fucking your ass had never crossed his mind until now.

he lubes up his cock, hoping it won’t hurt you that bad if it can just slip in, but his dumb little himbo brain doesn’t even think to ask you about it.

you lay there in anticipation, pussy drooling and when you finally feel his cock dragging up your slit, you hum. what you weren’t expecting, was to feel his cock trail up to that tight ring of muscle and push the head of his cock in, feeling yourself clench tightly over it.

you gasp, loudly, letting out a cry, “t-toshi! wh-what’re you doing?” you asked, panicked.

he groans at your cries and the tightness of your unused hole, “just relax, princess.” he shushes, pushing more of his fat cock inside of you. “be good and take my cock,”

the pillow under you is soaked with your tears mixed of pain and so much pleasure. you feel so full of him and it quite actually… feels sort of good— in a foreign way.

soon you’re just begging for more and more and more, till he bottoms out letting out groans and grunts you had never heard before. “fuck— you’re so tight, baby— ugh,”

he cums so embarrassingly quick and groans louder than he usually does every time he fucks your ass now and you kinda love it, so you let him do it more often than you should <//3

MIYA ATSUMU

atsumu loves you so much, but sometimes… you’re a such a dirty little slut. walking into the gym towards the end of his practice in practically nothing, short shorts and a tight tank top, rubbing up and down all of his teammates arms. the way you’re telling them how well they’re all doing with a pretty little smile making all of their cocks hard.

as soon as you two get home, he pulls you into your bedroom and bends you over the plush surface of the bed and yanks your underwear and shorts down to your ankles.

you’re gasping and panting wondering what’s going on in your boyfriends mind because you’re obviously an innocent saint. what could you have done for him to act like this?

“look at that, ma lil slut’s cunt ‘s already soaked,” he coos, dragging his fingers down your slit collecting your arousal. “what, did rubbin’ up all on my teammates like a lil whore getcha all wet?”

“tsumu...”

“shut it. since ya wanna be so dirty, maybe i should fuck you here? hmm?” he asks, moving his cock up to your tiny, puckered hole making you gasp in surprise.

you never told him, but he knew how much you loved getting fucked there. how good it always felt when his thick cock filled you up, him grunting and groaning about how much of a slut you are for begging for more— it’s all so good.

you turn and look over your shoulder, biting your lip with tears. he smiles, wickedly ay the tears falling down your face feeling the way his cock twitches. he reaches for the lube before squirting some all over your cute hole and his cock.

“now be a good lil slut and take ma fuckin’ cock,” he mutters, pushing his cock in without any warning. neglects your clit and makes you cum solely from his cock in your ass </3

SAKUSA KIYOOMI

sakusa is such a lewd fucker. he loves making a mess with you, creampies on top of creampies, making you squirt, watersports— absolutely loves it all.

anal is one of the few “taboo” things that you haven’t tried and kiyoomi wants to. so bad. just thinking about his pretty little slut’s ass stuffed full of his cock? it makes him writhe, but he doesn’t want to be the one to initiate that conversation. he was lucky to have you start the others, but this one just seems to embarrassing.

but fortunately for him, you are just as lewd as he is and have been thinking about it for a long while as well.

“kiyoomi…” you bite your lip, grasping his hands. “can… can we try something?” you ask, meekly, avoiding eye contact with him. his heart pounds in his chest because— is this it? is this the moment he’s been waiting for?

it definitely was because the moment the words fall from your mouth, it’s over. that’s how you’re here, fat tears rolling down your face as kiyoomi is brutally thursting into your tight, tight hole.

“god damn—“ he grits through his teeth ignoring your sobs. “been fucking you for so long and you’re still so fucking tight.”

you scream into your tear soaked pillow, tight grip as you fist the sheets— because god, the pain, the pleasure- his cock feels fucking fantastic. the little strength you have left, you lift yourself up and cry out for your boyfriend, “ki-kiyo-omi! o-omi!”

“what?” he growls, slapping your ass with a hard hand. “what is it now, slut? hmm? tell me.”

you throw your head back, hiccuping out, “‘s t-too big! cock’s too big!”

“‘want me to stop then?” he asks, stilling his hips observing the way you whine and push back on to him for more.

“that’s what i thought.”

BOKUTO KOUTAROU

you and bokuto actually have been wanting to try it for quite sometime, but you always ended up chickening out at the last second. or vice versa because the last thing bokuto wants to do is hurt you.

so you took it upon yourself to invest in a butt plug and extensively prep yourself for his massive cock. it took time of course, it was uncomfortable for the longest time, but that discomfort slowly turned into an odd sense of pleasure.

one evening, bokuto had come back from practice, all pent up and excited to see you. you greeted him kindly, a soft hi, baby falling from your lips before ravenously pressing your lips onto his. he’s shocked, but it doesn’t stop him from nearly devouring you, tangling one of his large hand into your hair and his other placed lightly on top of your tit.

you slowly break away, smiling at the way he whines for your plump lips to be back on his. you whisper, “kou… i wanna do it tonight… forreal this time.”

bokuto’s sure he’s never moved quicker in his life. it’s a blur really. all he remembers was his pants tightening quickly and picking you up to run you to your room.

now his shaft is drenched in lube and your face is pressed into the mattress with your back arched and your ass wiggling— waiting for him to fuck you. he taps the tip against your puckered hole and slowly pushes in, surprised at how easy the tip slips in, though it’s still tight fit.

“f-fuck, baby,” he moans, watching as your ass sucks him in, nearly cumming at the feeling of your warm walls hugging his length perfectly. “did ya stretch yourself out to take my cock, fuck!”

it feels so fucking good, the stretch is painful, but it hurts so so good. you’re whining and pushing yourself back on his cock, not sure if you’re gonna be able to wait much longer.

“yes, used a p-plug! kou, mmph,” you whimper, feeling him bottom out. “please, fuck me! fuck me hard, ‘m begging!”

a guttural groan comes out of his mouth when he heard your words, “whatever you want, pretty baby,”

IWAIZUMI HAJIME (big dick!hajime my king)

hajime will subtly hint at anal after he’s spent night after night dreaming about fucking you like that. nights he’s spent pumping his cock to the idea he knows that you would shoot down in a millisecond. he still cums so much at the mere thought of it all.

you’re smarter than hajime, so you know. every time he brushes the head of his leaky cock against your untouched hole or the way he’ll stick his thumb in every once in awhile. you know what he wants.

he doesn’t expect to be surprised by a pretty, heart-shaped plug to be presented to him when he flips your skirt up.

“b-baby?”

“ s’okay, haji,” you hum, looking back at him, seductively, a sinister look masked by faux innocence plastered on your face. “you’ll fuck me here, right?” you arch your back a little more, wiggling your ass in front of him.

his head was spinning, brain going haywire— unable to comprehend the fact that you wanted him to do the thing he’s been dreaming about for months. the only thing that snapped him out of it was the your cute little whine.

“haji, please? i’ll be so good for you!” you pout, “‘ll take it all, promise. just wan’ your cock in me, now.”

and that’s what breaks him. his needy little princess so pliant and submissive for him. he quickly grabs the readily available lube from the nightstand, squirting some into the palm of his hand and stroking his length.

he pulls out the plug, quickly replacing it with his cock without any warning— how can he remember to do anything when he’s already about to cum everywhere?

“h-haji!” you yelp when he pushes his fat cock in past your tiny hole, your body nearly ascending at the full feeling with only half of his cock in. “s-so big, haji! t-too!” you can’t finish your sentence. tears prick at your eyes and you claw at the bed sheets even though it’s practically euphoric.

“th-thought you were gonna be a good girl and take all of my cock?” he grits, not out of anger, but out of self control. it’s taking everything in his being not to fuck the living daylight out of you.

“n-no!” you sob, “still wan’ it! ‘m your good girl!” your facade is now gone, true desperation seeping through to him.

his cock twitches at your cries, “no worries, princess, ‘m gonna take care of you, make sure you cum harder than ever. gonna be my best fuckin’ girl.” he promises, giving a soft slap to your ass.

🏷 taglist: @guttgrinderr @silversslut

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angstysebfan · 3 years

Text

The Past Can Break You - 2

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

AU: Avengers

Summary: You and Bucky have been dating for aa few years. As far as you’re concerned he is the one. But what happens when a blast from the actual past shows up?

A/N: Ive seen a lot stories of Bucky getting his first love from the 40′s back. And I’ve always wondered... what would happen if he was dating someone already? Reader is from this time. Not proofread.

Warning: Smut 18+ only please

When Bucky made it up to your shared room he slowly and silently opened the door. You were sitting on your bed, your back facing the door, but he could tell you were crying by the shaking of your shoulders. It broke his heart to see you so upset.

He closed the door behind him and walked over to sit next to you. He wrapped his metal arm around your waist and pulled you into his embrace. You then openly sobbed into his chest. Bucky caressed your back and kissed you on the head, allowing you to cry.

When you started to calm down you sighed deeply, sniffed, and said, “Are you going to break up with me now?”

Bucky’s heart completely broke. He put his finger under your chin, forcing you to look at him. “No, baby. Of course not. I love you. I love you so much! Why would you think that?” He asks.

“Because before we started dating you told me about Dot and how much she meant to you. You were going to propose when you got home from the war. Well here is your chance to live the life you wanted with the girl you wanted,” you say as tears again start to leak from your eyes.

“Baby, I’m not the same man I was then. Yes, I still have love for Dot, but I’m so madly in love with you. I promise,” he said, kissing your forehead, nose, and then lips.

“I’m going to help Dot become acclimated to the world now, and help her settle. But I promise I will always be here for you, ok?” He asks.

You nod, feeling slightly better. “I love you,” you say.

“I love you too. I’ve gotta get down to the lab. I promised Dot I would be down there with her. But I won’t be long,” he says before kissing you again and then leaving.

You sit and wait for him, hoping it wouldn’t take too long. But after 4 hours you give up on him and go to sleep. You hope that he will keep his word on still loving you. You don’t want to lose him. You love him too much.

- -

1 month later

Over the last several weeks, you’ve only seen Bucky’s about a handful of times. He’s always off with Dot, helping her learn the ways of today, and helping her deal with her “trauma”. Every time he tries to give you a little time she always calls for him saying how upset she is or that she’s about to have a panic attack. You try and be understanding but at the same time it’s really starting to annoy you.

One of the worst things is that he barely even sleeps with you anymore. This morning you woke up to an empty bed, yet again, and head downstairs for breakfast. When you got down to the common room you heard the sound of Dot’s giggles and saw her sitting on the couch with Bucky, her feet on his lap. At that point you lost your appetite, so you went up to the roof instead.

After an hour you hear the door to the roof open as you’re staring off into the distance. You feel arms wrapped around your waist as a stubble chin rest on your shoulder. You decide to ignore him and continue staring off into the distance and several thoughts past of your mind.

“Was looking for you,” Bucky said as he kissed your shoulder. “Why you up here all alone?”

You sigh, “well I’m used to being alone a lot these days. And I guess I didn’t feel like sitting there watching you and Dot flirt in the common room,“ you say annoyed.

You hear him sigh behind you as he puts his forehead on your shoulder. “I know, and I’m so sorry that I haven’t been around much. I’m just trying to do my best to help her,” He said.

“I promise I’ll try and do better at managing my time so that I can spend more time with my girl,“ he says as he kisses the back of your head and trails kisses all the way down to your neck.

He turns you around in his arms and rests his forehead on yours. Before you know it you are both swaying to no music, until Bucky starts singing your song. You wrap your arms around his neck as you both slow dance to your song as Bucky sings. When he finishes you kiss him passionately.

“Tonight we will have date night. No Dot, no interruptions, just you, me, and that new lingerie you bought a few weeks ago,” he says as he continues to sway you.

You smile widely at the thought of spending a night alone with your boyfriend. “Oh Bucky, that sounds amazing! I’ve missed you so much, and I get what your doing, but it’s hard,” you say.

“I know. I’ve been neglecting you and it ends now. You are my priority, not Dot. And I’m sorry. Let me make it up to you. Tonight,” he says.

You kiss him in reply.

- -

Later that night, after dinner and another bout of dancing, you come out of the bathroom with your new lingerie set. You stand in the doorway staring at your half naked boyfriend. Bucky’s eyes darken with lust as he starts to stalk towards you like a lion about to pounce.

“You look good enough to eat, baby,” he says huskily. He then pulls you into his arms with a searing kiss.

He leads you to the bed and throws you on it, before jumping on top, connecting your lips again. His hand travels down to your core and he moves your panties to the side, putting pressure on your clit. He starts rubbing at an intensely fast pace, making you lose your breath. Very quickly he pulls your first orgasm from you.

Before you come back to earth you feel your new panties being ripped from you, as well as the bra. Bucky loved to rip your underwear all the time. He kissed his way down your stomach to your wet core and dove in. Your back arched off the bed.

“Oh my god, Bucky!” You moaned as your hand pulled his hair.

He then stuck two metal fingers into you and started pumping. You knew it wouldn’t be long now. You couldn’t stand the amazing sensation of his fingers and tongue. You started to feel the build up of pressure in your belly.

“Bucky! I’m going to cum,” you cry as you again orgasm on his face.

After a moment Bucky kisses his way back up your lips. You taste yourself on his tongue, which makes you wetter, if that’s possible. “You are the best thing I have ever tasted, Doll. Truly exquisite,” he says.

He then pulls off his pants and boxers before lining up with you. He slowly starts to push in, which feels amazing. After a moment he completely bottoms out in you. He kissed you, and just as he is about to thrust, you are both interrupted by FRIDAY.

“Sergeant Barnes, Ms. Jones is requesting to see you sir,” she says.

Bucky groans into your neck, “Tell her I’m busy and we’ll talk in the morning,” he says.

“I’m sorry sir, but she appears to be having a panic attack and having trouble breathing,” FRIDAY says.

“Shit,” Bucky says as he pulls out of you and grabs his sweats. He looks at you guiltily, “I’m sorry. I’ll be back in 10 minutes tops, and then we can finish what we started,” he says before running out the door.

You stare at the door as it closes in shock. He just left you in the middle of sex for his ex. What the hell! You lay there and wait, but after 2 hours you decide to get dressed in sweats and a t-shirt. You take your ruined lingerie and throw it out. You lay back on your bed thinking about how you will have a stern discussion when he comes back.

Before you know it, another 2 hours go by and it’s the middle of the night. You’re more than angry, now you are hurt. You grab your pillow and your blanket and leave your shared room with Bucky, and head to your old room. After locking the door, you inform FRIDAY not to let anyone, especially Bucky in. You climb into bed and allow a few tears before falling asleep.

- -

Bucky woke up the next morning disoriented. When he realized he was still in Dot’s room he panicked. After he finally got Dot to calm down last night he went to leave but Dot begged him to stay until she fell asleep. He must have dozed off too. He quickly got out of the bed and quietly exited the room.

Steve was coming down the hall and saw Bucky’s coming out of Dot’s room. “ why are you in Dot‘s room?” Steve asked.

“She had a panic attack last night and I came to calm her down and fell asleep. Y/N is going to be so pissed at me,” Bucky said.

“Wasn’t last night date night?” Steve asked.

Bucky nodded, “Yea and Dot interrupted right in the middle of sex. I left Y/N there naked on the bed like a jackass,” Bucky said angrily.

“You left her in the middle of sex to deal for your ex!? Why didn’t you ask me to deal with it?” Steve yelled.

“I don’t know. Dot says she only feel comfortable with me. I’m just trying to help her. But I’m going to lose my girl in the process. I’ll talk to Dot later about it, but things have to change. I can’t keep ignoring my girl,” Bucky said.

Steve nodded, “Yeah, we’ll good luck with talking to her after last night,” he said before slapping Bucky’s shoulder and leaving.

Bucky sighed and went to your shared room, only to see that you weren’t there. He checked the kitchen, common room, roof, gym, and lab but couldn’t find you. The last place he went was to your old bedroom. He found the door locked, which told him he found you.

“FRIDAY, can you please open the door?” He asked the AI.

“I’m sorry Sergeant Barnes. But I was requested by Agent Y/L/N to not let anyone, especially you in,” FRIDAY said.

Bucky’s heart dropped. He really messed up.

- -

Chapter 1 / Chapter 3

A lot happening in this chapter. Bucky being stupid, but at least he is aware. Now can he fix it? will the reader let him? And what else will Dot do? Feedback is appreciated!

Permanent Taglist: @hailmary-yramliah @tuiccim @comedictragedy @cap-n-stuff @thefridgeismybestie @swiftmind @aleaisntcreative @lookiamtrying @pinknerdpanda @morganclaire4 @iamvalentinaconstanza @verygraphicink @im-squished @joannie95 @peace-love-hobbitness @connie326 @amandamdiehl @harrysthiccthighss @its-izzys @roserose26 @rebekahdawkins @elegantobservationstudentsblog @broco8 @shinykoalacat @white-wolf1940 @jessyballet

Story Taglist: @afuckingshituniverse @wintrfld

#bucky #Bucky Barnes #james bucky barnes #james buchanan barnes #Bucky angst #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes angst #bucky x reader #bucky x you #bucky x y/n #bucky x dot

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katsukikiss · 3 years

Text

YOU’RE MINE, NOT HIS

CHARACTERS ARE AGED UP// BAKUGO X F!READER

Warning: NSFW 18+, cheating (not really), fingering, unprotected sex

You and Izuku have gotten very close recently while studying together, and a certain someone isnt very happy about it.

AN: Poor Izuku 🥺 I felt so bad writing this, but so good at the same time lol I must write something soon to pay him back//also send me requests for oneshots! im down to try anything you guys might want!

WC: 2k

Masterlist

You and Izuku had a ‘study date’ last night at his house. You were hardly struggling in organic chem, just needed an excuse to come over at this point. You two had been meeting for tutoring sessions for the last two months or so. Your grades had thoroughly improved since then, so most people believed thats all you two were doing; studying. And you were, of course, but as of recently it was a lot more than that. It started with innocent glances at your chest while you took notes, brushing his fingers along your leg when you couldn’t figure out the answer to a question, and you weren’t oblivious. You began to reciprocate the feeling, wearing shorter skirts to bend over and pick up your pencil, laying your hands on his chest when you begged him to give you the answers. He adored the way you looked up at him so innocently, with pleading eyes, desperately needing his help. He loved helping you improve, after all, he wanted you to become a great hero by his side one day.

However, not everyone was oblivious to you and Izuku’s little sessions. Bakugo knew something was going on between you two. He had never seen Izuku so protective over someone the way he was with you. He hated the way the green-haired boy would stare at you with dark eyes when you spoke to another male student. He noticed how he’d always want to be around you, his demeanor changing when you would leave for a different class or when training sessions were split up. Bakugo was utterly disgusted by it, but it gave him an evil idea. ‘She doesn’t belong to him, she never will, I’ll be sure of it’ he thought to himself.

After last nights study session, you failed to realize that you had left your textbook on his bed. He noticed soon after you left and texted you, telling you not to worry and that he’d bring it for you tomorrow morning. You had missed him in the morning though, running late from going to get an iced coffee, so you decided you would get it from his bag in the locker room before your chem class. You both had training but you had to go to a different site with the rest of the girls, while the boys stayed in a closer facility.

Your water quirk meant that you spent a lot of time getting wet, so naturally, your hero suit looked like an elegant yet sexy two piece swim suit. The top was white, long sleeved with a cut out above your breasts and the bottoms were a standard bikini bottom, with sheer white tights that were waterproof. You always felt so weird wearing it during co-ed training sessions, but Momo urged you to feel confident in it, telling you that you looked sooo hot in it. You got to the girls locker room early to slip into your hero suit. You made your way over to the boys locker room and took a peek inside. They all seemed to be out and training already so you snuck inside. You looked around before you spotted his bag, his All Might backpack. You chuckled a bit before bending over to unzip the bag. You grabbed your textbook from it and zipped the bag back up. You stood up to leave but when you turned to face the door, a large figure stood in your way.

“Oi, what do you think you’re doing in here?” the intimidating blonde scoffed at you. You shuffled backwards, clutching your book in your arms. You were sure that everyone had left already, was he here the whole time? He began to step forward before he was standing an inch from you. You looked up to meet his eyes that were piercing down at you.

“And you’ve got your sexy little hero suit on, its almost like you wanted to get caught in here” he laughed with a devilish grin.

“I-I have training to go to. I was getting my textbook from Izuku’s bag” you managed to say. His eyes filled with rage upon hearing his name. He thought of the late nights you two spent together, he imagined Izuku talking down to you, treating you like some helpless puppy, acting like he was some sort of hero, taking advantage of you. You were taken back by the face he made at you. You knew Bakugo hated Izuku, but what did your relationship with him have to do with that? Was he jealous? Or spiteful?

“I dont know what you see in Deku, but I can promise you, you’ll forget all about him after this” Bakugo said in a husky voice. ‘After what?’ you thought. Before you had time to think, his hand was wrapped around your neck as he pulled his lips to yours, crashing the two together. You and Izuku weren’t dating, but something about this felt wrong. You pulled yourself away from him and stepped back.

“Bakugo, w-we shouldn’t, this isn’t right”

“I don’t think you belong to him do you? Come on, I see the way you look at me”

He was right, you do look at him with flirtatious eyes, or at least, you used to. Before you and Izuku started meeting to study, you would fawn over Bakugo. He never seemed to return the feelings however, always picking on you or making fun of you. You deemed that as him being uninterested, so you moved on from your infatuation, but you were very wrong. He never stopped watching over you, showing his affection in his own odd way. But his heart dropped when he realized you didn’t look at him the same anymore, but looked at Izuku that way instead. He couldn’t stand to see you with that nerd when he deserved to have you. You were lost in your thoughts that you didn’t even realize he had stepped closer to you. You were up against the lockers now, your exposed back grazing the cold metal.

He bent down and whispered seductively in your ear, “Let me make you feel good baby, we don’t have much time in here and I think you should see what a real man feels like”. He pressed his lips to yours, more feverishly this time, as if he was about to lose you. His tongue invaded your mouth and tangled with yours. You didn’t pull away this time so he slipped his hand under your suit and began to grab at your breast. He brought his coarse fingers to your nipples and began gently rolling it around between them. You let out a breathy moan into his mouth. He shuddered at the sound of your voice, he loved hearing you enjoy his touch.

He traced his free hand down your stomach until he got to the waist band of your tight bottoms. You squeeze his shoulder with one hand and run your fingers through his hair with the other. He slipped his hand underneath and started by running his fingers along your folds. He dipped two fingers into your cunt and began to gently pump them in and out of you. He removed his lips from yours, moving down to your neck, sucking and biting at your tender flesh. You let out soft cries as his fingers pick up the pace.

“Tell me what you want” he demanded, looking back up into your eyes. You felt a pang of guilt in your chest as you remembered why you were in the locker room in the first place. Anguish and regret was painted on your face and Bakugo noticed.

“Don’t feel bad baby, what he doesn’t know cant hurt him, now be a good girl and tell me exactly what you want” he said as he plunged another finger inside you. Your legs shook and all your thoughts of Izuku vanished under his touch. He was only trying to comfort you in the moment, but he wanted Izuku to know what you two were doing.

“P-please I want you, I want you i-inside please” you begged. You needed to feel him, you needed him to fuck you.

“I knew it, Deku’s just not doing it for ya is he?” he said with a cocky grin. Truth be told, you and Izuku had never gotten that far before because he was taking things too slow. You desperately needed a good fuck, it had been months since you’ve last felt this good. You knew Izuku would be a gentle sweetheart in the sheets but you needed someone who could do both; fuck you senseless but also make love, and Bakugo could hit both those marks.

He removed his fingers from you as you clenched around the emptiness he left. He pulled your bottoms down and quickly turned you around, pushing your face into the lockers. You hear him fumble to unzip his pants before he prodded his member at your entrance. You couldn’t look back to see exactly how big he was but when he began to drag his cock along your folds, your legs started to tremble. He gathered your slick and pushed into you. You let out a loud cry as your walls grasped onto his girthy cock. He grabbed your wrists and pulled them behind your back, holding them with one hand. He started to violently pound into you, his balls slapping against your swollen lips, echoing in the empty locker room. He used his free hand to reach around and started to swirl his fingers around your sensitive nub. His pace never let up, he started to thrust harder and deeper with every second. Tears started to form as you felt your orgasm coming up.

“Who do you belong to?” he grunted into your ear, his breath hot against your neck.

“You Katsuki, I be-belong to you”

“Thats right babygirl, only me, now cum all over my cock”

Your legs began to quiver and your entire body convulsed. You let out a long cry as your walls clenched and released your juices all over him. He couldn’t take much more after that and removed his hand from your nub before he grabbed at your ass, gripping onto it for dear life. His pace quickened before he quickly pulled out, his cock twitching, warm shots of cum spurting all over your back and ass. He leaned to kiss you on the cheek then walked over to his bag, pulling out a small white towel. You stayed motionless, still with your face pressed against the lockers waiting for him to return. He cleaned you up and turned you around to face him. Realizing how long you two were in there, you quickly pulled your bottoms and tights up, fearful that the other boys would be returning any moment. Bakugo looked disappointed in how rushed you were to leave him. You tried to step forward but he planted a hand next to your head against the lockers. With his other hand he tilted your chin up and placed a soft kiss on your lips.

“You know I can tutor you right?” he said with a small smirk. You blushed at the suggestion. You didn’t really need tutoring anymore, but you would love to see him again. Before you could answer you heard a door open. Bakugo removed his arm from the locker and turned to look at who interrupted you two.

“Y/n! Are you okay? Did you find my bag?” he asked sympathetically. You swallowed hard and just nodded, bending to pick up the textbook you had dropped. You quickly scurried to the door before looking back at Bakugo quickly with a stern eye, as if signaling for him to ‘keep his mouth shut’. He looked back at you with a devious smile and a wink before you shut the door.

“What are you doing in here with y/n? What did you do?”

“I just taught her a lesson, I don’t think she’ll be needing your help anymore” Bakugo said with a smug grin before leaving Izuku alone in the locker room.

#bakugou katsuki x reader #bnha smut #mha smut #mha bakugou #bakugou katsuki #midoriya izuku #izuku fluff

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tsukishimas-shortcake · 3 years

Text

Relationship Headcanons

↦ Character(s): Hakkai Shiba x fem!reader

↦ Rating/Warning: No rating though there are some light mentions of abuse (if you have read the manga you are aware of what I am talking about, I’m not going very deep into it though it literally just mentions it), mentions of anxiety attacks (no detail though), fluff, not proof read

↦ Word count: 1.8k (longer than planned, sections are bolded)

↦ Your Momo’s Receipt: Hello~ I’m post yet another TR headcanon and this was requested by the lovely @strawbub I hope this doesn’t disappoint, it did get longer than planned but I enjoyed writing it. I'll prob do a part two that's more of a scenario based on your first date or something since I didn't go into it here. Please note: for those of you who don’t know my blog is currently under construction, meaning I will not be updating my masterlist for the time being.

So how did you guys meet, well mostly because of Yuzuha,

One day in like elementary you’re walking home and you see this super pretty middle school girl just like yelling at this small group of guys

The guys end up running off just because they don’t wanna deal with her or the attention she's drawn to them

Behind her was a boy, taller than her but obviously younger. You didn’t assume they knew eachother though.

The boy and yuzuha began walking in opposite directions because one was going home while the other was going to pick up something like groceries

You’re so entranced by how she stood up to them yet she’s a girl who was far smaller and you end up catching up to her, almost stepping on her heels

You end up absent mindedly following her into the grocery store and eventually she just freezes, turns, and stare directly at you

Your eyes widen since you must’ve been staring and she just goes “may I ask why you’re following me?” And you explain how cool she was earlier. She invites you over for dinner (esp since her older brother won’t be home) and figured it’d be good for Hakkai to meet someone his age

You end up going over but Hakkai didn’t come down to eat so you never actually got to meet him, though from then on you would see Yuzuha every so often, visit every other weekend or so

But no matter how often you came over the next few months, you never once met hakkai,

That was until you both reached the end of your middle school education and we’re about to begin high school

You had gone over because you were going to borrow an old work book from Yuzuha, and when you go to knock on the door the door opens before your closed fist could hit it, instead hitting a firm chest

You blush and quickly apologize but the person in front of you doesn’t move at all, doesn’t say anything and almost looks like they drifted into space with their dead stare

You assume this is yuzuha’s older brother because you’ve also never met him and you immediately turn to walk away but Yuzuha calls over hakkai’s shoulder

“Y/N-Chan! You just got here where are you going?” This was def not yuzuha’s older brother. There’s no way she’d be that happy with him around; oh my god. Realization hit, the guy who you hit (though it was more of a tap) was hakkai.

The hakkai you had only caught a glimpse of in yuzuha’s photos, never talked to or actually seen in person despite going to the same school and living in the same neighborhood

He must hate you. That’s why he avoids you. That’s def why - is what you think

Yuzuha drags hakkai back inside and invites you in; you sit down with them in the living room and watch hakkai visibly relax now that he’s inside his house, his own space, with a pillow behind him and a blanket covering his lower half, he almost curls up into it as he continues to avoid your stare

“Hi hakkai…Kun? Im L/N Y/N” you say and you see his face dead pan once again

Yuzuha can be heard laughing from the kitchen as she comes back in.

She leans over and begins explaining that hakkai literally just freezes with any interaction between him and girls who aren’t in his family

You nod, thinking maybe it’s an anxiety thing? Which is the case with you, but only because he’s been watching you since you’ve come over (not in a creepy way) wanting to and working the courage up to talk to you

The 5th or so time you came over after that encounter he was inches away from introducing himself before the house phone rang causing everyone to kind of “wake up” in a sense

Every time since then he gets closer and closer but isn’t able to say anything; he even realizes he has a crush on you.

The way you sit when you do homework and how cute you look when you’re focused.

How your forehead scrunches up when you’re trying to figure something out and you end up just sitting back with a small huff followed by yuzuha’s signature laughter.

It’s also a huge thing that you get along with Yuzuha.

So enough with first meeting time for the confession.

He ends up confessing accidentally. He didn’t know you were coming over to begin with so he was flustered out of his mind. And how was he supposed to know you hadn’t actually fallen asleep and you could hear him over the tv

The tv was more white noise than anything and the day was hot since it was the middle of summer causing the window to be open and the sound of soft wind and small birds to drift in; this was the hot that makes you tired so you were all sprawled out of just sitting in a daze

So while resting your head on the table you’re dozing in and out but then you hear hakkai begin to speak, something he never really did around you

Now did you and hakkai text? Yes. Did it take him an hour to reply because his brain would explode when you replied to him? Yes. But was it a start to communication? Also a yes.

You hear him say your name quietly before he moved closer, you can feel his gaze on your features

“I like you” is all he says. Simple and sweet. But you sit there in shock, trying not to blush so he’ll have no idea you heard him but he can tell because your forehead scrunches

You heard him and are focused on if you should reply or not. And he knows that.

You open your eyes and just look up at him, he’s closer than expected. His hand close to yours on the floor and he reaches over and grabs it lightly. Hoping you’ll also return the gesture by holding his hand instead of leaving your hand limp inside his.

And you do, thank goodness, and Hakkai almost mentally can’t handle it.

Once you start dating it’s more so just hanging out at his house or yours; however he talks a bit more and you text a lot more. He’s gotten better at replying. It usually takes him like 15 minutes now

He’s kinda stressed about your relationship but not due to anything you or him did

He’s stressed because of the mentality his older brother gave him

Is he even allowed to be this happy?

He finally has someone thats small enough and naive enough that he can protect you; compared to constantly being protected it’s a sudden, strong, yet good change for him

He’s touch s t a r v e d

Yes Yuzuha shows affection; but he stopped accepting her hugs when he was around 8 just because he physically wasn’t able to handle it due to his bruises and such

But with you, even with his bruises and all you take care of him. Able to coax him into using medicines and toning down the physical violence (that he can control himself)

He also finds it super soothing when you lightly brush over his scars (especially those that his brother gave him), it helps him believe that scars are only physical and can fade with help

One thing that stresses him out the most is trying to hide you from his brother. Any time you leave something at the house its easy to pass it off as yuzuha's but when it comes to things like photos he has with you, he can't hang them up, show them off, or have them as his phone Lock Screen, etc. because he just really doesn't want his brother to know and target you since he'll then know that you're his weakness (aside from yuzuha as well)

Sometimes won't explain why he can't hang out and has legit pushed you out of his house before at the last minute notice of his brother coming home

Will always make sure you get home safe though, usually by having Yuzuha go with you since then she can just say you're a friend from school

Your parents love him, though they were a bit hesitant it became a "you always have a place to stay" because they learned about their family situation from you and yuzuha. So expect him to spend the night when he's too scared to deal with his brother. Same with yuzuha. (yes I know this isn't yuzuha head canons but its hard to write for him without mentioning her when they're so close)

We're talking three person sleep overs. Yuzuha and you of course share the bed and Hakkai takes some time to even set foot in your room much less sleep on a mattress that's on the floor

He has a small heart attack every time he comes into your room because he's overwhelmed with everything, he's never been so comfortable and it makes him feel restless. Like he's never and I mean n e v e r been less stressed and slept better than when he does so in your room

The smell, the colors, just being surrounded by you is something that completely changes his mood

Once showed up after he fought with his brother, tears in his eyes and clothes a bit tattered and you just pulled him to your room, and sat down with him.

You laid on your bed with him laying down onto of you, head on your chest as you rubbed his head and only said a few words "its not your fault"

He ends up crying so hard he falls asleep and gets dehydrated and you have to make him drink a bunch of water when he finally wakes up.

NSFW

super fucking careful w you

almost annoyingly so, but you're understanding

He knows that he might be taking things frustratingly slow but he knows that since you understand and know his history that you can help him get through it

Your first time you think you'll have to call it off because he's shaking so bad

"baby... are you sure it won't hurt you?" he keeps asking.

pretty sure that's the longest its ever taken him to finish because he was so anxious

despite being so slow and hesitant, late he isn't too scared to get a bit rougher

but im not talking anything crazy im talking like he's willing to pull your hair a bit or nip a bit harder at your neck.

Please never ask him to do anything like degrade you or some type of harsh physical rough shit, he can't

like literally im 99% sure that if you ask him to choke you or something he will pass out because of the anxiety attack he would have at even the thought.

in short with nsfw though he is sweet boy. He's a switch through and through. Loves when you take care of everything because then he doesn't have to be scared of hurting you.

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