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#but i'm letting you know just to be safe
inkskinned · 1 year
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there are a lot of posts out there that are positive and healthy coping mechanisms for handling the holidays. this is not one of them :)
i think there's like. going to be times in your life you will be stuck in a social situation that you cannot escape from gracefully. i do not know why the internet doesn't believe these times exist. it's not always just that your physical safety is at risk - sometimes it's legit like "i just don't currently have the energy or time to put in the effort of responding to this." sometimes it's a coworker you hate so much. sometimes it's just like, fine, you know? like you know you can handle your aunt when she's cheerily horrible, but if you actually set a boundary around her, it's going to be weeks of fallout with your father.
i don't know why people think the answer is always just "cut them out!" or "don't let them get away with that!" because ... the real world is tricky and complicated. i think kind of a lot of us have an internal "radiation poisoning" meter for certain people. like - i'm talking about the ones who are absolutely giving you gradual ick damage. like, you can handle them, but you'll be exhausted.
and yes. you absolutely should listen to your therapist and the good posts about handling others and set good boundaries and take care of yourself. prioritize peace.
HOWEVER :) ...... since im often in a situation with a Gradual Sense of Ick person i cannot just "cut out" of my life (without losing someone else precious to me) - i have sort of developed the most. maladaptive form of mischief possible. because like, if i'm going to have to listen to this shit again, i like to have a little bit of private fun with it.
now! again, i am physically safe, just mentally drained by this man. you should only do this with people you are not in danger with. which leads me to my suggestions for when your Unfortunate Acquaintance shows up and says oh everyone pay attention to me.
my favorite word is "maybe!" said as brightly and happily as possible. whenever the Horrible Person starts in on a topic you do not want to go further with, particularly if they make a claim that you know to be inaccurate, do not respond to it. you and i have both tried to actually argue with this person, and it hasn't gone well, because this person just wants the drama of an argument. however, "maybe!" gives them literally nothing to go on. it is incredibly disarming. they are used to people having some response. they know they can't prove what they're saying, and maybe! treats them like the child they are. it dismisses them in the politest way possible.
i like to say maybe! and then, in their stunned silence, immediately change the subject. this is because i have adhd and i will have something unrelated to talk about, but if you can't think of topics fast enough, i recommend just pointing to something and saying, "isn't that lovely?" because fuck you let's bring in some positivity.
by the way. that second trick - of pointing to something and stating an opinion about it? - that just works on its own, like, 70% of the time. i picked it up from teaching preschoolers. it's an intentional "redirect". it stops children crying and it also stops grown adults from finishing their explanation on why women belong in kitchens. dual wielding!
keep it silly for yourself. i absolutely do not care if people think i'm fucking stupid (it's more fun if they do) and as a result i will purposefully misunderstand things just to see how long it takes them to realize i've completely removed them from the subject at hand. when they say "women aren't funny" i get to be like. "which women." "all women." "all women in america?" "no in the world." "like the mole people? the people in the world?" "what? no. like, alive." "oh are we not counting the mole people?" "what the fuck are you talking about." "you don't believe in the mole people?"
similarly, i play a personal game called "one up me." my Evil Acquaintance literally knows this game exists (my family & friends caught onto it and now also play it) and it always fucking gets him. i don't know why. you have to be willing to be a little free-spirited on this one, though. the trick is that when they make one of those horrible little bigoted or annoying comments they are always making, you need to go one unit weirder. not more intense, mind you - just more weird. "you don't look good in that dress." "yeah, actually, my other dress was covered in squid ink due to a mishap at the soup store." "you shouldn't wear such revealing clothes." "wait, what? oh shit. sorry, your son tears off strips when no one is looking and eats them. i swear it was longer before we left the building."
the point of "one up me" is to completely upend this person's narrative. we both know this person likes setting up situations where you cannot "win" and then they really like telling other people how badly you handled it. in a usual situation, if you respond "please don't say something that rude", you're a bitch. but if you let it happen, you're letting yourself be debased. they are not usually expecting door number three: unflappably odd. because what are they going to say when they're telling everyone how badly you behaved? "she said my son eats her dresses" ".... okay?"
if you can, form an allyship with someone whomst you can tagteam with. where they can pick up on your weird "soup store" story and run with it.
the following phrase is amazing and can be deployed for any situation: "oh, be nice :) it's the holidays!" i do not know why this works as often as it does. i'll say it for the most random shit. i think this is bc most of the time these people know they're being impolite, they just like to fight.
godbless. when in doubt, remember that you could always start stealing their pens.
the whole point of this is - if you can't escape. maybe see how long you can just be. like. a horrible little menace.
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thisismisogynoir · 28 days
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I love it when women hate men. I love it when women are allowed to vent to each other about how horrible and creepy men are. I love it when women form friendships with and prioritize each other over relationships with men(whether they're attracted to them or not). I love it when women put men dni in their bios and on their nude photos and on posts on their blogs. I love it when women refuse to mollycoddle and accommodate entitled male feelings with "but this doesn't mean I hate all men, I know a few men who are great, I love my father/sons/brothers/uncles/male cousins/guy friends" I love it when women complain about men WITHOUT "not all men" being a disclaimer. I love it when women avoid socializing with/refuse to be around/befriend/get close to men because they know men can't be trusted. I love it when women make "kill all men" jokes. I love it when women offer absolutely no concern or care for men's feelings and if their misandry offends men whatsoever because why should we, men are the oppressor class who have raped and killed and abused us and kept us as subjugated as second-class citizens for millennia, they regularly mistreat us and the women in their own marginalized communities still every single day and make this world so much harder and more awful for us to be in, and if we choose to hate them and not spare them any sympathy then so be it, and I don't just mean "men as a class" either, you can be a woman who doesn't want to have anything to do with any man on an individual basis and completely cuts off men from her personal life too and ykw I will love and fucking support you in that because men deserve absolutely NOTHING from us. If they're so tough and strong then they can handle it just like they can handle being lonely. If you are a woman who hates men, ESPECIALLY IF YOU ARE A LESBIAN AND/OR A TRANS WOMAN, then just know that I love you. I love you, I support you, and you are safe here.
#was going to make a post about how much i hate that women aren't allowed to hate their oppressors but i decided to spin it into something#positive instead#this is supposed to be the feminist site that makes reddit mgtow piss their baby diapers so let's go back to despising men and not coddling#their feelings and let's dye our hair blue while we're at it#i am so tired of this new wave of guilt-tripping and gaslighting women who hate men and don't trust or want to be around them#i hate how we're made into villainesses or the problematic ones for not valuing them in our lives or for wanting to guard ourselves or be#safe from our oppressors#and i'm tired of people who don't know the first thing about feminism being like 'BUT THAT'S TERF RHETORIC WHAT ABOUT X MINORITY MEN'#guess what women can also be x minority that you're trying to protect the men of and we get to hate men too#trans women are included when i say women btw and trans men are included when i say men#if anyone has the right to hate men more than anybody else it's trans women esp trans lesbians because they put up with so much shit#from men that even cis women do not and they especially know how vile men are behind closed doors#so#terfs fuck off#radfems fuck off#and if anybody tries to make this post more appeasing to men or 'not all men's this post you are getting blocked and hit with a hammer#feminism#misogyny#sexism#patriarchy#tw men#tw rape#tw abuse#misandry#terfs dni#radfems dni#feminists need to go back to being scary and unpalatable for men none of this 'but some of them are good!' bullshit#men are entitled to nothing from us#and if you try to prove me wrong then you are just proving my point if you have nothing good to say then simply keep scrolling#ok? ok.
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piecanl · 4 months
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Do you think Tubbo would recognize the path Bad is going down, because it's one he's already walked down on?
This self-destructive behavior coming from a broken heart?
He hasn't seen Bad at his best, before the eggs got kidnapped. He's seen him a victim to grief more than a father. It's why the blue staining Bad's being isn't out of the ordinary.
But suddenly he starts carrying flowers to remind him of the love he lost, suddenly the void calls out his name even louder and suddenly Tubbo sees himself in the older demon.
And it's scary, because suddenly he sees what he has become, how it affects others.
And for the first time of many, he sees Bad walk down a road he's paved. For the first time of many, Bad is the one repeating Tubbo's mistakes.
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chloecherrysip · 1 year
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We're going to save your brother.
#mario movie#mario movie spoilers#super mario bros#super mario bros movie#super mario bros movie spoilers#princess peach#mareach#cherrysip edits#I FEEL LIKE THIS MOMENT DID NOT GET THE ATTENTION AND APPRECIATION IT DESERVED ON HERE#man i could write you an essay about this#i do think that the 'i'm not afraid! i'll do anything for my brother' line actually ISN'T said during this scene - it's probably earlier#but that this line IS in the right place (peach's mouth movements match)#which means that scene is going to break me because it just seems like a very vulnerable sweet moment between them#where peach and mario get to talk about the situation they're in and their fears and how big the stakes are for both of them#peach fighting to protect her kingdom and her subjects - the immense pressure on her to stop bowser because of her role as a leader#and mario desperately trying to save his brother - not knowing if luigi is ok or not and not being able to keep him safe is so painful#i think that's why mario doesn't have his hat on - the adventure is starting to weigh on him and he opens up to peach for the first time#about him and luigi and their closeness and how he CAN'T lose his brother he CAN'T let him down when he needs him more than ever#and peach reassures him and it means the world. even in this quick clip there's something a little sad about his face#but also there's relief and gratefulness to her for saying that. they're the absolute sweetest :) :) :)#i could be off base but that really does seem like the vibe of this scene from what we've seen and i am ALL ABOUT IT
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byler-alarmist · 10 months
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What scares me most about Byler endgame is the reality of it likely coming out long after the US presidential election 2024.
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stabbyfoxandrew · 3 months
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happy wip wednesday! I shall humbly request arsonist!neil like every week <3
I am very normal and I am not kicking my feet and giggling whenever you post btw I'm normal
WIP Wednesday (1/24) | Arsonist Neil / Firefighter Andrew AU (Part 92)
Neil blinks when he realizes how right Andrew is. He can’t imagine how difficult life would’ve been had he not been an only child. Would Mary have taken this hypothetical sibling as well or left them to rot in Baltimore? The thought makes him sick to his stomach.
10 You don’t like your brother? Andrew He’s my brother. I love him. He doesn’t like me. At least, he didn’t when we were younger. I think he does now. Maybe. A little, at least. In case you haven’t noticed, I’m not the most like-able person.
Neil frowns at that. Andrew is nice. He’s the easiest person to talk to. And he’s funny. What’s not to like?
10 You seem like-able to me. But what do I know, I’m just an arsonist. Andrew You're dumb. And speaking of your little hobby, you better cool it for a while. Last night was horrible. In fact, I’d say it counts as at least three fires.
Neil considers that for a moment. It was big, yes. One of the biggest fires he’s ever set. But…
10 Nope. One match, one building. One fire.
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pinkieroy · 9 months
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And another thing (this is the last one, I promise, I will stop going on tags and rabbitholing my way into reading discussions i disagree with)
Another thing I don't know where came from is the idea that the rest of the party doesn't interact with their relationship, that it is something isolated and that the others don't comment or interfere with, that it's kept apart from the group, because that is simply not true?
I'm too lazy to look for exact quotes right now, but in episode 65 Ashton was the one, after Laudna's outburst, that insisted for her to go somewhere to reconnect with Imogen, sure Imogen kept saying she would be with Laudna, but Ashton very clearly knew that some time alone with Imogen could make her feel better.
But you also have other things sprinkled out through the campaign like the "are you staring because you are jealous?" From Fearne during the dusk arc, FCG after getting the share dream spell suggesting numerous times to use with them, FCG getting Imogen to kiss Laudna's forehead for the ritual, Orym comparing Imogen's loss to his own six years before, "that dead lady's got a lot of love in her heart", Ashton and FCG helping Laudna on the gift shop, Fearne trying to to help in episode 65 telling Laudna Imogen was thinking about her the whole time.
My point is the party is not alienated from them, they have private moments, sure, but some post I read was talking about how the party doesn't interfere with the "stagnation" of their relationship, which just sounds so weird to me? Where exactly do they need to interfere? Unless one of them was having trouble and was asking for advice (which is something that, ya know, happened) I don't see why they need to interject, unless you want their relationship/dynamic to change, because it is not your cup of tea, so it isn't that the other characters don't interact with their relationship is that you want the interaction to be different (which is valid, I disagree but everyone has their taste in shipping and fiction in general), but trying to say that they keep their relationship far removed from the others is not really true is it?
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uncanny-tranny · 10 months
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"The world isn't a safe place, so get used to it!"
Man, as somebody who's survived multiple, long-lasting instances of abuse from a very young age, I was under the impression that the world was, indeed, so safe and conforming to my desires. I'm practically stunned to learn that this is not the case, and I have been severely humbled
(Sarcasm fully intended)
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mintytrifecta · 5 months
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Hey as Hanukkah approaches fast please take time to let your Jewish friends know they're safe to celebrate around you
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flowercrowngods · 6 months
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i don't know how to be merely acquaintances when we used to be friends. or i think we used to be. i don't know how to yearn for a simple hello when you've been heaping your affection on me months ago, and i don't know how to talk to you when you won't say anything. when suddenly it's all about me. you know i have nothing to say, you know my brain is void of everything but horribleness and i cannot tell you about my day because i don't even know about my day. i cannot tell you about my day when i know you won't listen, when i know you'll apply your philosophy to my world and don't believe me when i say that everything is terrible. i don't know how to be the person you seem to think i am, or the person you want in your life. i don't know if you want anyone else in your life now that you're in love and sappy, found another recipient for your affections, leaving me empty and wounded and yearning.
you said you missed me. said it many times, while i was gone. now i'm back, have been back, and i wonder how you missed me, why you missed me, when you won't talk to me. i think you mistook missing for worrying. i think you mistook caring for a feeling of obligation. i think you like missing me more than talking to me.
and i think i can't breathe with how much that hurts
#how do you miss me when you won't talk to me? how do you like me so much and then go to just. not?#how did i let you in when i try so hard not to let people do that because i know that once they get past the walls all i'll be left with#is the idea of them rotting and withering inside me. polluting the space i create to keep myself safe.#why does everyone leave? leave in silence too. leaving behind so many questions and so many words engraved in my brain#i am so tired of *grieving* when those i grieve are still alive and well and thriving and i'm reminded that it's versions of myself#that i'm grieving instead. how do you grieve yourself? how do you not fucking fall apart over it?#just. fucking talk to me. don't make it be true that all i'll ever be is nothingness and the memory of someone you liked once#but never never never liked enough#i'm so so cold already. i'm a shell. i want to be warm again but it always leaves me so hollow and hurting#i grieve the dio who was warm. i grieve them i miss them i am so so angry that he had to leave. to hide. with no way out#i'm happy for you. i'm happy you're happy. but you're no better than anyone else and it makes me want to run away again#but i have nowhere else to run and no one else to be. and it's so fucked that it doesn't matter who i am i'll never be enough#for someone to just. stay. to see me and to stay. to hear me and to sit and listen and just. just fucking stay.#maybe i'm not worth staying for. maybe there's nothing to know nothing to hear nothing to see nothing to listen to nothing to find#maybe all i'll ever get is one/two good months paid for with a lifetime of grief. and i'm at the point where i don't want the good months#anymore with you or anyone else who tears down these walls with affection that is so endlessly addictive and leaves me yearning.#on the off chance that it will keep the grief away too. but that's the thing about grief isn't it? it's here to stay. unlike you#god this is so fucked up and i'll delete this later but for now i just need to. let it out. poe said i should make a side blog for the grie#but poe's not there anymore. poe has stopped starting fires. so this goes on main until shame makes me take it down#blah#personal#not st
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blackbackedjackal · 10 months
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Sometimes I think about how long some of you all have been following me and I'm like wow, ya'll really like watching this clown.
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cosmic-kaden · 3 days
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Just know that even tho I'm not here, I am thinking about all my f/o.
I am rewatching every movie with them. I hope this bad feeling passes and I'll feel less like a worthless waste of space.
I hope they can pull me through...
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rovermcfly · 2 years
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ok I wanna talk about these posts
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Now I don't wanna say these posts are wrong or that I disagree with them, but they are only two of many that I see in a similar vein and my general take is: We need to change the way we have this conversation.
Because yes. It is true that young people get indoctrinated on TikTok (and other platforms including tumblr!) in the same way older generations get indoctrinated through FOX News or Facebook.
But we can't let these conversations always start and stop with "these groups are gullible and THIS vague entity is responsible for it and I am so smart for realising this and they're stupid for not realising it".
We need to finally start solution-oriented conversations. We need people who don't just point at the problem but actually talk about how we can fix it.
TikTok has an issue with misinformation that users don't have the tools to recognise?
Well here's a list of only a few of the TikTok accounts that fight this issue right on the platform where they can get these users' attention.
MediaWise
Abbie Richards
Aslan Pahari
Astro Alexandra
Professor Casey
Hank Green
Adam Conover
All of these, to varying degrees, correct misinformation and/or provide tools to promote media literacy. Some even want to help change the platform altogether.
I know not everyone who wants to help can do things like this, but a good place to start helping change things would be to support these accounts and all the other people out there doing what they do. Most of them are on other platforms or have websites (or Patreon/Ko-Fi/etc bc monetary support for these efforts is important too) if you don't wanna get a TikTok account to help them get more attention.
And here is a Masterpost where I collect resources for how to improve your own media literacy and how to help others do the same (and I promise you, no matter how smart or skilled or media-literate you think you are, you will learn something new from these). This masterpost is updated regularly and includes a longer list of TikTok users to follow as well.
So next time you see a post like this about how stupid TikTok users are for falling for conspiracies or how Facebook is nothing but fake news or whatever, think about whether the post is actually helping in some way or only trying to make tumblr users feel superior over others, and maybe try to share something you learned here instead.
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miabrown007 · 2 months
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going crazy about kaz brekker hours
#HE'S JUST *screams into a pillow*#Inej wants him to be better she NEEDS him to be better and shed his armour and be emotionall vulnerable and honest to her#and every time he tries it life delivers a right hook into his solar plexus and knocks him to hell and back#and time and time again he is made to come to the incorrect conclusion that being vulnerable and soft and caring about anyone ever#is a mistake and a weakness that he isn't allowed that he doesn't deserve#and his only way of getting what he wants and keeping the people he loves safe is if he becomes something that can't love them#like life just continues to punish him for having any kind of feelings#and he can only love them if he kills the part of himself that loves them. like COME ON MAN#i'm literally unwell about this kid (KID HE'S FUCKING 17 LET HIM LIVE)#someone sedate me (well actually don't i need to start reading CK tonight)#Kaz I Am Ruin And Ruination Brekker#and it's so tragic because he has come such a long way during SoC and when Inej asks him to be hers you know he can't do it. he would like#to but he's unable of it like his walls are still built up so high.#and it's fair of her to ask because she needs that and keeping her always at arms length is not viable of Kaz but also that's all he can#currently give her. that's his all and it's not enough and my heart is breaking for them ohmygod#they make me think so much of felonies love square I'LL EAT GLASS#okay. anyway. finished six of crows. i'm normal about them.#mia's reading
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54prowl · 2 years
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I'm going to try to be as kind as I can with this.
so ok I've been seeing this more often than usual recently but please try to be normal when reblogging stuff especially creative works. avoid putting hateful tags on reblogs because the original poster sees that.
you wouldn't want a random person saying "#wow I hate this character but---" on your works, right? (and that is not the compliment you want it to be btw.)
and stop seeking content on this site just to shit on it. go make a post about it instead of reblogging something to put mean tags on. someone worked hard on that, don't be a dick.
don't spout community on this site while being the cancer that causes creators to stop sharing their works.
please be normal. ok ily bye.
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torgawl · 6 months
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i'm too mentally unwell for this (people shoving ragbros angst in my face at 10 am)
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