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desos-records · 3 years

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Everything Mythologically Inaccurate about Hercules (1997)

I was bored and I love this dorky movie, okay? Fight me. This is gonna be long.

Hercules is the Roman version, Heracles is Greek.

The number of Muses vary slightly depending on who you ask, but generally there’s supposed to be nine, not five, but whatever this is cool. According to the wiki, these ladies are Calliope, Muse of epic poetry; Clio, Muse of history; Melpomene, Muse of tragedy; Terpsichore, Muse of dance; and Thalia, Muse of comedy—which means we’re missing Urania, Muse of astronomy; Euterpe, Muse of music; Polyhymnia, Muse of sacred poetry; and Erato, Muse of love poetry

The Titans were the beings who ruled the universe before the gods (usually before humans were a twinkle in Prometheus’ eye), not nature-themed Kaiju. This period is referred to as the Golden Age. They are actually the children of Gaia, the earth goddess, so characterizing them as destroying the planet is a little weird. The story of how Zeus overthrew them is told in the Theogony.

Chaos is the primordial being at the beginning of the Greek creation story. They’ve actually been chilling out somewhere under the Earth ever since they created Nyx and Erebus.

In Greek mythology, earthquakes are either caused by Poseidon or Hades getting very very angry and volcanoes are either Hephaestus’ forges or Typhon throwing a hissy fit.

Oversimplification of the Theogony, but okay. Zeus did use his thunderbolts to defeat (castrate, then cut into pieces and cast into Tartarus) his father Kronos, king of the Titans, and claim the throne. The other gods helped too. Not all of the Titans were thrown into Tartarus, actually just Kronos, I think

Obvious Christian Pearly Gates of Heaven aside, Olympus looks really cool. Was that the Sun Chariot??? Sick.

Not gonna nitpick ALL the gods’ character designs because we’d be here all day, but it seems like they’re inspired by Renaissance paintings

Hera and Zeus do not have a happy marriage. There’s a story where Hera was forced/tricked into becoming Zeus’ wife. In the Iliad, she is the one plotting against Zeus to overthrow him.

Heracles was not born a god and he’s definitely not Hera’s son. Zeus disguised himself as the mortal Alcmene’s husband, then had sex with her. Heracles was born a mortal.

Why are there cherubs floating in the background, those are from the Bible get them out of here

Orpheus… does flower arrangements?? OH is it a pun on music arrangements??

Why is Narcissus here?? He’s a mortal. And, like, super dead. Like, turned into a flower dead

Yeah, so Pegasus is the child of Poseidon and Medusa. not created by Zeus. And for gods’ sake, he was given to Bellerophon, the son of Poseidon, not Perseus and not Heracles. Like a son of Zeus would ever be caught dead with a horse

That said, after Bellerophon died, Pegasus was stabled on Olympus and given the task of carrying Zeus’ lightning bolts.

Why… why is Poseidon a fishman?? Whatever. Moving on.

Zeus would be a terrible father. There. I said it. A son would mean he’s eventually going to be overthrown and that is Zeus’ Number One Fear. It’s probably why everyone picks on Ares constantly (Zeus’ only legitimate son; Hephaestus was made by Hera all on her own, thank you very much). He’s only nice to his daughters.

Actually, I am gonna nitpick the character designs for a sec. THAT IS NOT DIONYSUS THAT IS CLEARLY SILENUS FFS

Okay, about Hades. His job is ruling the underworld where all the mortal spirits go after death. Basically, he’s the head of the underworld TSA. By all accounts, he’s a chill chthonic god who is not evil, stop equating him with the Devil, thank you.

I’m just gonna get this out of my system: WHERE IS PERSEPHONE? QUEEN OF THE UNDERWORLD?? OG GODDESS OF THE DEAD???

“Bestowed” is a strong word, more like Hades drew the short straw, but okay. In the Theogony, Zeus, Poseidon, and Hades drew lots to divide up the sky, seas, and under the earth. Hades is also the god of precious metals and jewels.

Yeah, Mythological Hades has never ever plotted to overthrow Zeus. Hera has, so has Poseidon, Athena, and others, but not Hades.

I don’t know what Myth!Hades’ opinion on the dead is exactly, but it’s probably not THIS.

Also, why is Charon a skeleton? Why is the River Styx just a river of souls?? What is going on here???

If Hades is anything, he’s fair, okay? He follows the rules. You wanna get mad about the ruthlessness of death, take it up with the Fates.

Aw, hi Cerberus

This. is not what the Greek underworld looks like. Where are the fields of Asphodel? Did they forget that Elysium, the Greek equivalent of Heaven, is also down here??

Okay, I think Pain and Panic are based on Phobos and Deimos, the greek gods of panic and dread, who are twin sons of Ares and Aphrodite btw and have nothing at all to do with Hades, but they wanted their demon henchmen so here we are

In Hesiod, there are all kinds of spirits who cause humanity different kinds of pain and they do live down in the underworld. They’re called the Algea and are the children of Eris. Usually they do the bidding of the Olympian gods or the Fates, not Hades.

Fun Fact: Lyssa is the Algea of rage and rabies; she caused Heracles to kill his wife and children by the orders of Hera.

Now this character design is a mix up of the Grey Sisters (the Graeae) and the Fates (the Moirai), who are two separate trios of old ladies who know shit no one else does. The Fates are weavers who decide the course of every single event and life, mortal or divine. Everyone, even Zeus who is technically their father in some stories, is terrified of them and wouldn’t call on them for a meeting like this. The Grey Sisters share an eye and a tooth between them and gave Perseus information on his quest.

Yeah, that’s not how death works in Greek mythology. Why have Charon at all if they’re just gonna fly in like that??? Where is Thanatos? What about crossing the river? And coins for the ferryman??

This makes me wonder if Hades tried this every time Zeus has a divine son? Like did he try this shit on Apollo, Ares, Hermes, Hephaestus, and Dionysus too? Like, 70% of the main 12 are his kids, why is this only coming up now??

Hades really should have gone to the Oracle, revealing the future is literally her job

The planets will fucking WHAT now???

Uh, Hades is already in charge of Tartarus, it’s literally in the underworld, why does he need to wait for the planets to do shit to open it up??

I would like to point out also, that Tartarus is technically it’s own deity. It’s not just a giant hole. Tartarus has children. It’s also a place of imprisonment and torment for various Titans, giants, and mortals. The Cyclops and Hundred-Handed-Ones used to be trapped there by Kronos, but Zeus freed them.

Prophecies are pretty standard for Greek mythology actually and some of them are that straight forward, so this is fine actually

Good god, I’m only ten minutes in what the fuck have I started?

Okay, but Hades is a chthonic god and Hephaestus and Hestia are the gods of fire, so why… nevermind, moving on.

*flashes back to that time Zeus turned Apollo and Poseidon mortal and made them build the walls of Troy as punishment for trying to overthrow him* Sure, that evil plan sounds suuuuper solid, Hades, you do you

I refuse to believe Hera and Zeus sleep in the same bed.

“The baby!” cries the couple that, rumor has it, one of them dropped Hephaestus off Olympus, permanently disabling an immortal god and their child

Zeus really does have selective omnipotence, so that’s fine

It’s funny, because in the myths the exact opposite of this happens. Heracles is abandoned by his mother as an infant for giving off vibes, then he’s rescued by Athena who gives him to Hera. Hera apparently sees no consequences in breastfeeding random mortal babies because she feeds Heracles some of her milk without knowing who’s child he is and her divine breastmilk gives him superstrength

Also, Heracles’ mother, Alcmene, is actually nobility, not a farmer, so this Superman routine is way off base, but sure.

This is also probably a good time to mention that Heracles has a non-demigod twin brother, Iphicles. His father is Alcmene’s husband, not Zeus, but they were, I guess, conceived back to back, so they were born together?

Lucky that they put his name on that necklace. Btw his birth name is Alcaeus. He was later named Heracles (glory of Hera) to try and stop Hera from trying to kill him all the time.

Heracles did strangle two snakes as an infant. The snakes were sent by Hera in an attempt to kill him. You’ll notice the name thing didn’t work.

*glances over at Dionysus, who started out as a demigod and became a god because Zeus decided he could be* yeahhh, Heracles being mortal is super sad and unavoidable, oh no!

I wonder if Heracles pulling the cart is a reference to those twins who carried their mother to the temple in place of oxen and then they died. (Kleobis and Biton)

Penelope, like Odysseus’ wife??

You know, in the myths, Heracles loses control of his strength and kills his music teacher, so I actually like clumsy, over-earnest Hercules better

See, this is why Achilles only had the one friend

I can’t believe this, but Heracles being ginger could have myth precedence. Characters in the Iliad like Achilles and Menelaus are described as xanthos which is kind of a tawny, strawberry blond color. It’s the equivalent of anime characters with purple hair, it’s just to point out that they’re Different and Special and Not Quite Human

Why does Go The Distance always make me wanna cry??? I really do love this movie

It’s the symbol of WHO now???

Please please please, y’all, start depicting Greek temple statues as painted like they really were, for my mental health, please

Oh, I think this is based on the temple of Zeus at Olympia. Neat. Made by the same guy who did the Athena Parthenos.

Actually, revealing his parentage like that is totally in character for Zeus

NO HE DOES NOT HAVE HERA’S EYES

Again, Zeus gives out immortality all the time. This is not an issue.

I could write an essay (and I have) on the differences between Ancient Greek Heroism and Modern American Heroism, but basically it boils down to this: Ancient Greek heroes aren’t required to be morally good people in order to gain eternal fame from Zeus and be considered heroes. Heroism means that they can do things no one else can. Odysseus is clever, Heracles is strong, Achilles is a killer fighter. Those things are why they’re heroes, not necessarily their moral character.

Right, so Heracles was actually trained by Chiron, the centaur. Philoctetes is a minor character in the Iliad who was a friend of Heracles and received his bow and arrows upon his death/ascension. He spent most of the Trojan war stranded on an island because he had an infected foot wound. Ten years later, the Greeks find out they need him and his arrows to win the war and have to sail back to get him.

Well, that’s just insulting to Pegasus

Go The Distance is still making me cry, oh god

Which planets are those supposed to be anyway??

Philoctetes being stranded on an island is accurate; him being a Satyr is not

Satyrs running after nymphs like this is actually a thing in Greek myths, it’s gross, but true. Based on the myth of Pan and the origin of pan pipes. Equally gross. No means no, kids.

Reference to how Jason was killed by the mast of his own ship falling on his head

Okay, now I have to explain the Greek heroic timeline. Heracles is actually a great-grandson of Perseus, but Odysseus and Achilles belong to the generation after Heracles. Jason is technically a contemporary, so is Theseus. In some myths, Heracles sails with the Argonauts. So basically, “would-be heroes” my ass, Phil

Why does Phil have the Golden Fleece?

Okay, let’s see, reference to the scar Odysseus has on his thigh from a wild boar attack, reference to Perseus using Hermes’ gear to fly, reference to Theseus fighting the Minotaur, nailed it

Why is Phil speaking Yiddish??

The context for why Achilles gets KO’d by an arrow to the heel is fascinating actually. It’s a reference in itself to older myths where Zeus gets his tendons pulled out of him by giants and is temporarily powerless until the gods, uh… restring him. And I would argue that losing Patroclus is what killed him first

Also, poison arrows, y’all. One nic is all it takes.

Also, also, Achilles’ whole prophecy thing revolves around him choosing to die young in battle so he would be remembered forever. That’s about as Go The Distance as anyone in Greek myth, Phil. Not everyone gets to burn off their mortal half on a funeral pyre and ascend to godhood like Herc.

Not even gonna mention Patroclus, I see, the guy with the highest body count in the Iliad, who almost conquered Troy single-handed until Apollo decided to ruin his day

Why is this so hard to believe Phil? If you trained ALL the heroes, then you’ve literally already trained a child of Zeus

Yeah, the divine intervention is about right

Holy shit, Phil keeps his gym equipment in an Ancient Greek coffin

I wanted to say that Damsel in Distress isn’t a Greek Hero thing and then I remembered Andromeda, so, carry on

Okay, this thing about Thebes having a ‘rep’ is totally true, everything bad happens in Thebes. I had a professor explain it to me once that the Ancient Greek attitudes towards Athens vs Thebes is kinda like the cultural associations with New York vs Los Angeles

Hey, that’s Nessus. That’s the centaur that Heracles killed who’s blood eventually killed him back. Oh yeah, centaur blood is poisonous btw

Did Heracles just check between the centaur’s legs for balls?? Dude.

I love Megara. Myth!Megara is Heracles’ first wife, you know, the one he kills in a delusional rage caused by Hera and the entire reason he has to do the 12 Labors in the first place

Of all the things from the myths that they chose to get right, horny Satyrs is what they went with?? Gross.

Somehow I doubt that centaurs wear horseshoes, but okay

Megara says No Means No. Oh, and she’s the princess of Thebes, definitely not mixed up with Hades in whatever Devil Pact thing this is supposed to be

Did Hades just speak in Yiddish too??

I feel the need to point out that the Hydra usually lives in a swamp

A rockslide?? C’mon, Herc, it’s fire that kills Hydras

Everyone get your bingo cards out, it’s time to play The 12 Labors of Hercules Lightning Round

Lernean Hydra, swamp monster w/multiple heads, check

The Erymanthian Boar, a really big wild boar, check

The Nemean Lion, a lion with golden, indestructible fur, check

Is that a harpy? Not one of the labors, but we can put that in place of the Stymphalian Birds

That looked like Cetus, again not a labor, but there are stories where Heracles killed it. In other stories, it’s the monster killed by Perseus to save Andromeda

Uhhh, Minotaur, Gryphon, and a Gorgon?? Now they’re just screwing with me

Ugh, gladiators are Roman, whatever.

Poseidon is the father of monsters why does Hades have so much pull with all these mythological creatures???

Remember what I said about earthquakes being caused by Hades getting angry? Would you look at that, they got that one.

Hitting on the concept of the Fatal Flaw. Usually for Greeks it’s hubris, thinking they’re better than the gods, or rage

Okay, but Pandora was created specifically to open the box of evils, so is that really a flaw?

Hades. doesn’t. sell. souls.

In Greek Myth, doing cool shit would be enough to earn godhood, but no we gotta get Moral about it, okay

I smell Catholic influences here

There’s my accurate Heracles outfit, thank you

Stables of Augeas, one of the labors, famously disgusting

Girdle of Hippolyta, also one of the labors

Herc and Meg are so much cuter than the myth version, I’ll take cheesy Love Conquers All over a murder fest any day

Awkward moment to mention that Megara is actually related to Oedipus (king of Thebes, remember). They’re cousins.

Eros reference. Cute.

Gods, they’re adorable, what was I talking about again??

I Won’t Say I’m In Love lives rent free in my head

Is this what Hades gets up to when Persephone isn’t home?

We can all agree that the female pegasus bit is gross, right? Right.

Shit, Herc. You can’t just say shit like that, that’s how Andromeda almost got eaten by a sea monster, check yourself, kid

I guess, technically, Heracles was killed by his second wife, so maybe the being betrayed (sorta) by Meg and losing his strength thing tracks, idk it’s a stretch

That’s. That’s not where Tartarus is. And they’re your uncles, Hades, show some respect.

Hey. A cyclops in Tartarus, look at that. Go back to the forges, buddy

Traditionally, Zeus’ lightning bolts were made by the Cyclops, but I have a soft spot for Hephaestus, so I’m glad he’s getting some spotlight

A pair of giants tried to take over Olympus like this once, it didn’t end well for them. This seems way too easy.

Good job, Herc, that’s how Odysseus defeated Polyphemus.

Now is probably a good point to mention that Heracles usually defeats his monsters through trickery, not strength alone

Are you really a Greek hero if you don’t try to break the universe a bit when the love of your life dies?

Capture Cerberus, one the labors, well-done sneaking that in there, 7/12

“Rip to Orpheus, but I’m different” — Herc, probably

I’m not crying, you’re crying

That’s sweet, Herc, but you know, in the Eros and Psyche myth, Zeus just gives Psyche immortality so they can live together, why can’t we do that here? Hasn’t she proven herself a hero?? I mean she straight up died for Hercules.

If you got this far, uh, congrats. Tell me your favorite Greek myth.

Clash of the Titans (2010)

O Brother Where Art Thou (2000)

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iamshwee · 3 years

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Hellenism and the Journey of the Afterlife

In the original mythology of Hellenism, the Greek Underworld was considered another world or realm where our souls, known as our Shade, is taken after death. In the original Greek afterlife, at the moment of our death the shade is separated from the corpse when Death (Thanatos) reaches out to cut a lock of hair from the corpses head (often referred to as a ‘lifeline’) where it then takes the now unphysical shape of that former person. The Messenger God (Hermes) then transports the shade across the River Styx (the river of hatred) to the entrance of the Underworld. The Underworld is sometimes simply known by the name of its patron god, Hades, and is treated as a resting place for the soul before it drinks from the River Lethe (waters of forgetfulness) and is reincarnated into a new life. Many within Hellenism believe in form of reincarnation and this was a subject broached by many philosophers of the ancient world. However, the journey of the afterlife is the more commonly resonating belief. The Underworld itself is described as either ‘the outer bounds of the deepest ocean’ or ‘darkness hidden beneath the depths of the end of the earth,’ and thus is considered the darkest counterpart to the brightness of Mount Olympus. This realm itself is invisible to the living and made solely for the dead to be used as almost a type of bypass station.

Once Hermes delivers the shades to the entrance of the Underworld, good people and bad people would then be separated. Infront and directly across from the entrance of the Underworld lives the personifications of Grief (Penthos), Anxiety (Curae), Diseases (Nosoi), Old Age (Geras), Fear (Phobos), Hunger (Limos), Need (Aporia), Death (Thanatos), Agony (Algae), Sleep (Hypnos), and Guilty Joys (Gaudia). On the opposite side of the entrance holds War (Polemos), Discord (Eris), and the Furies (Erinyes). Many beasts lay waiting before the entrance of the Underworld, including Centaurs, Gorgons, a Hydra, the giant Geryon, the Chimera, and screaming Harpies. In the center of all this lies an Elm tree, where False and Broken Dreams (Oneiroi) hang from the branches like dead leaves.

Shades that enter the Underworld carry a coin under their tongues to pay the ferryman, known as a Charon, to take them across the River Acheron (river of pain) safely. Within Hellenism, the dead are properly buried with a coin under their tongue as an offering, or like the Trojan hero, Aeneas, who delivered a rare tree branch called a Golden Bough to the Charon. The Charon is permitted to turn shades away, often the shades of the unburied, which cannot be taken from bank to bank without payment, often due to a lack of proper burial. The physical description of the Charon has changed over the years but is often portrayed to be a barren, filthy, hollow-looking human-shaped creature with fire red eyes, a long unkempt beard, and a dirty dark ash cloak.

Once the Charon carries a shade across the river, there lies the mighty three-headed hound of Hades, Cerberus, guarding the gates as well as the Three Judges of the Underworld. These minor demigods are known as King Aeacus; the guardian of the keys to the gate of the Underworld, King Rhadamanthus; the lord of Elysium, and King Minos; the judge with the final vote. It is up to these judges to outline the deeds of the deceased, and they create the laws that govern the Underworld. Most of the laws of the Underworld assured that there was no true justice waiting for the shades of the dead and that they wouldn’t necessarily receive ‘awards’ for how they lived their physical mortal lives.

However, the overall voted outcome for any shade can be changed by Hade's command, if and when he pleased. When the Earth was divided between Chronos and Rheas' three sons; Zeus received Mount Olympus, Poseidon the vast seas, and Hades the Underworld. Hades is rarely seen outside his own realm, regardless of his co-ownership of the Earth, and most punishments shades received were often demanded by other gods seeking eternal vengeance. He was not a tormenter of the dead and sometimes had even been considered the ‘Zeus of the dead’ due to his being so hospitable to them. He did not run his realm on his own, however.

Persephone (Kore), daughter of the harvest Goddess Demeter and Zeus, is often considered a fitting other half to Hades, though their origin story changes depending on point of view. Once, when Persephone was alone gathering wildflowers, she came across a beautiful narcissus flower that was planted specifically for her by Gaia as a favor to Hades, who had fallen in love with Persephone and desired her as his wife. It is said that Hades believed Persephone to be ‘more beautiful than the Goddess Aphrodite’ and would settle for nothing less than her love. The moment Persephone picked the narcissus flower, Hades appeared from a fresh crack in the Earth, riding a golden chariot and carrying the torches of Hekate, on his mission to seduce Persephone into the Underworld. Demeter searched for her daughter relentlessly, begging that the other deities help her do the same. Learning of this abduction infuriated Demeter, leading her to neglect the Earth and forbidding harvest, freezing the grounds until her daughter was returned to her. Zeus, annoyed by the cries of starving mortals, and badgered by fellow deities who heard of Demeter's anguish, forced Hades to return Persephone to Mount Olympus.

Hades complies with the request, but not before offering Persephone six pomegranate seeds for her journey home. It was explained to Demeter that she would be released so long as she had not tasted the ‘food of the dead.’ Unaware of Hade's trickery, Hermes was sent to retrieve Persephone but was informed she had tasted the food of the Underworld and was now bound to its realm. Instead, Hades offered a deal to Demeter; that Persephone may stay in the Underworld for half the year (the winter/fall months) and come back to Earth the other half (the spring/summer months) to be with her mother. Thus, every half-year, when Demeter and her daughter were reunited, the Earth flourished with vegetation and color. But for the latter months each year when Persephone returned to the Underworld, the Earth would once again become cold and barren. This is essentially Hellenism’s explanation for the seasons and in this way, Hades was able to gift Persephone, Goddess of spring and fertility, with being the Queen of the Underworld and his wife, thus ruling over their realm side by side. Persephone helped to give death a more merciful face, regardless of Hades' bouts of kindness toward shades. While Hades was known for being immovable, Persephone even assists several heroes and grieving lovers who stumble down lost into the Underworld. But beyond their realm, and Hades beloved Cerberus, holds the final resting places for all shades; the Isles of the Blessed called Elysium, the Asphodel Meadows, the Mourning Fields, and the Dungeon of Torment called Tartarus.

Elysium, also known as the Elysian Fields, is one concept of the afterlife, described as the place for exceptional beings, often ‘Heroes,’ to eternally reside. As this concept modernized, Elysium was later expanded to include those righteously chosen mortals who are pure of heart. This makes Elysium essentially the Hellenic Paradise, where they may live a blessed, happy afterlife, with grand feasts, and the ability to indulge in whatever their deepest desires may entail. It is said that the philosopher Socrates, and the Hero Achilles, were two of the few who were permitted into this glorious afterlife.

We do not know much about the Asphodel Meadows, other than that it is a section of the Ancient Greek Underworld where the shades of ordinary people are sent to after death. Those who have never committed a significant crime or had not achieved any level of greatness or recognition, reside here. Those who were not permitted into Elysium, and had nowhere else they belonged, spent their afterlife among the Asphodel Meadows realms. Essentially, this is where every day people’s shades settle within the afterlife. Similarly, the Mourning Fields were a concept from the Latin Epic Poem ‘Aeneid’ written by Virgil between 29 BC and 19 BC. This was a section of the Underworld that was reserved for shades who wasted their lives on unrequited love or died of a broken heart.

Tartarus is said to be as far beneath the Underworld as the Earth is beneath the sky. This essentially means that Tartarus was so dark that ‘the night is poured around it in three rows like a collar around the neck, while above it grows the roots of the Earth and the unharvested sea.’ This is where Zeus originally cast the Titans, along with his father, Cronus. It is said that Homer believed Cronus to be the King of Tartarus and that Odysseus mentions some of the people within the Underworld who are experiencing ‘punishment’ were found here. This is the deepest abyss of the Underworld and is used as a dungeon to torment and influence suffering for those who lived a particularly wicked life.

The Greeks believed that there was a great journey into the afterlife, but that the afterlife held no purpose. The souls of the dead still existed, but that they were insubstantial and often too weak and therefore unable to make influences on the living. The shades in the Underworld were now essentially neutral, and that no one was able to use their previous lives to their advantage after death. They believed that death was not a complete end to life, or human existence, but accepted that not unlike life, the afterlife was relatively meaningless. It is said that you are in the afterlife who you are in the moment of your death; meaning someone who died in battle would be covered in blood in entering the Underworld, and those who died in their sleep remained peaceful. The Greeks considered their dead to be irritable and unpleasant on occasion, but they are not necessarily dangerous or malevolent. The souls can grow angry and hostile, and often the Greek's response to this would be a drink offering, or even blood sacrifices to initiate communication.

Unlike its Catholic counterpart, the afterlife in Hellenism does not necessarily revolve around divine punishment. Those who are punished in Tartarus deserved the same level of punishment while living, thus assuring the ordinary and mundane shades an afterlife of equality and simplicity. While some believed in reincarnation and thus the recycling of our shades, it is widely acknowledged that all of our shade's journeys will eventually end. The likely hood of an everyday person passing on and ending up in a sort of ‘hell’ type afterlife is relatively slim in the eyes of Hellenism, and it gives the Greeks a sense of relief in death instead of an intensely instilled fear.

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thegeneralguy · 3 years

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The Champion of Olympus - Hera´s Hatred

Hello everyone! I wanted to take a moment to thank all the amazing support and positive feedback the stories have gotten. I’m very glad this community is so welcoming, and I hope you keep enjoying my creations. Credits to @amalianetwork for the picture and correction.

The thunder palace had been in complete chaos since Zeus announced his plan to stop Typhon and save Olympus. Winged servants flew swiftly back and forth across the residence, organizing the more organizational aspects of such an event like the upcoming ritual. Nervous chatter reigned across the halls, uncertain of what was about to come. It was usually the lesser creatures of the heavens who suffered the most casualties during the original monster´s assaults to Mount Olympus. The celestial Sentinels stood silently guarding the palace´s many different rooms. Their muscular solid gold bodies reflected the shining sunlight entering through the building´s many skylights. They were fierce pieces of weaponry when activated with heavenly power, but until then they represented little more than beautiful statues adorning the already opulent palace interior.

The queen of the heavens watched the palace´s eastern garden with apathy from her balcony on the uppermost level of the residence. Long golden hair was flowing magically around her back, giving the impression of being permanently swinging under a non-existent wind. Her slender frame was covered by a luxurious white robe that shone like the sun itself, with beautiful peacock feathers adorning the neck and sleeves from the garment. She stood impassively watching her servants move in a panic once again due to the capricious whims of her husband. Although she was the queen of the heavens, Zeus outranked her in the divine hierarchy. And that drove Hera mad with anger.

Not to mention her husband´s many romantic escapades, each one of them an extra nail on the coffin of her compassionate heart. After a life full of intrigues and plotting revenge, the goddess of marriage was left ironically with an unhappy marriage, together with eons worth of hateful feelings against her husband. She tried everything to stop him, from harassing his offspring to tear other gods down to shreds out of pure jealousy. But nothing could change the king of the gods, who felt his birthright was taking whatever he pleased, especially sexual satisfaction. His rage was left permanently marked on her perfect body, leaving the scars of her ankles as an imperfect reminder of what Zeus was truly capable of. In the end, Hera limited herself to watch somberly each one of her husbands' movements, waiting for a moment to strike. A knock on the door resonated in the room and Hera turned around to receive her expected guest.

"Come in."

She said with a melodious, but a somewhat cold voice. Like a beautiful snowflake falling on warm skin. The strong celestial Sentinels then opened the door, and Hermes entered the room. He bowed reluctantly to the goddess; his sense of duty much stronger than his utter repulse for the beautiful monster.

"The package you requested, my queen."

He said presenting Hera with a little crystal bottle with shining water inside. The queen got close and grabbed the bottle in her delicate hands. Hermes stood up once again and looked at the goddess. Her beauty was unheard of, making everything else seem mundane and worthless. A curvaceous and elegant silhouette leads to an aesthetically perfect face, her beautiful features harmonizing with each other to the point of being unsettling. Her irises were also an iridescent gold, standing out like beacons from her emotionless expression. But the god of travel could see something dark lurking beneath the otherwise bright eyes. The true form of Hera´s sinister demeanor printing itself as a red halo emanating from her pupils, fading into the shining gold. She was surrounded by a permanent bright halo, completely solidifying her status as heavenly royalty and a warning sign of the unmeasurable power the goddess possessed.

"Thank you, Hermes, you may now leave the premises. I'm sure the king has other tasks for you to complete."

Said Hera with a glimmer of disdain in her voice. The fast god of travel was indeed always busy. As the head of trade on all realms, he was constantly flying back and forth from every corner of the universe. The queen of the heavens always saw someone complicit to her husband´s deeds in him, because Hermes knew everything and everyone of interest for Olympus.

Hermes analyzed the goddess´ unusual rushing of their encounter, which normally ended with Hera insisting on him telling her Zeus´s antics to the point of threatening with violence. But this time, Hera seemed impatient, quickly dismissing him without even trying to squeeze some information out of him. He quickly glanced at the ornamental bottle in the queen's hands.

"If I may ask, my Lady, why is it that you needed water from the river Styx? It is certainly not fitting for a queen to be asking for such mundane favors."

"That's none of your concern, godling. Now please leave the premises, or I´ll have my guards escort you out."

The gigantic automatons opened the door and looked inside expectantly with their solid gold eyes. Hermes sighed and quickly took flight, passing both guards faster than lightning and heading to the outside court. He might be a god, but the celestial Sentinels were heavenly weapons designed to give even deities a hard time, and he had better things to do than being dismembered by the queen´s guardians like some of his half-siblings.

Hera was then left alone in her chambers again. Her unfazed calm expression was briefly interrupted by a sinister smile. Hermes was a nosy deity and he certainly was going to keep investigating, but at least she had bought some time to start executing her plan. It was true that with a simple command she could go to the riverbank in the underworld and get as much water as she wanted, but her plot required absolutely no suspicion from anybody. The god of travel could be curious, but his honor for his duty was stronger than his petty need for gossip, so she was sure he would not talk a word to anyone else about the mysterious gift he brought for the queen. Many creatures in his brother´s hellish realm could sense her overwhelming presence with ease, so this was considered the safest way to acquire what she was looking for.

She then approached a big chest next to the bed, and with a movement in her hand released a golden wave of energy that swiftly seeped into the lock. She heard a complex mechanism on the inside clicking, and then the chest opened. The queen of heaven had many secrets. Some were very easy to hide like her curses against lesser beings from her husband´s bloodline and others were a bit harder due to their intense radiation of divine energy. The true golden fleece for example, along with some golden apples from the Hesperides and Ariadne´s golden thread. Relics she had quickly collected from the terrestrial plane for safekeeping mostly. But on the bottom of the trove laid what she was truly looking for.

Hera pulled out an ornate mirror from the chest and took it to a big marble altar in the far corner of the room. The queen of heaven´s magical ability was rivaled only by a few other deities, and she enjoyed performing all kinds of rituals and curses to execute her will everywhere she needed to. She didn't feel the necessity of dirtying her energy by traveling down to the realm of mortals, far preferring a more indirect approach. The mirror in her hand was one of the strongest divination tools ever created, crafted as a gift from her son Hephaestus from ores coming from the Delphi temple itself. Its ability to watch over the currents of time was only inferior to Apollo himself and the Delphi oracle’s vision. The relic had been the inspiration for epic tales down on the Earth, as Hera allowed it from time to time to fall into the hands of mortals only to plant the seeds of conflict for the goddess´s enjoyment.

She put the mirror in the middle of the altar and took out the tiny water bottle. She then sprinkled a few drops of the Styx´s water on the surface of the mirror, and chanted the required incantation, releasing powerful divine energy from her body into the artifact. The mirror´s surface then became liquid, absorbing the river's water and flowing outside the ornate frame. Hera walked back and watched as a potent stream of liquid mirror flowed down the altar, forming a large puddle in front of her. A strong wave of energy pulsed out of the liquid. Hera raised her hands and finished the incantation, and from the puddle raised an identical copy of the goddess. The only difference was that her light halo was missing, along with her golden eyes, which were a reflective polished silver. Like a mirror.

"Oh, oracle of truth, knower of the unseen and progenitor of the universe´s secrets. Hear my command and show me my destiny."

The doppelganger smiled, as it lifted its robe to show a vast firmament full of stars. A deep vibration came out of the black veil. The marble columns of the queen's chamber vibrated, as a black fog started seeping out of the creature´s robe. An ominous voice came out of the veil, answering the Goddess´s call.

"What is it that you seek, Hera. Daughter of Rhea. Heiress of the heavens."

The fake queen stared impassively at Hera with her mirror eyes fixated on her, the expression vacant like a statue´s. The mirror´s creature was only a conduit for the true knower of all, the origin of the universe. It was unusual for an Olympic deity to contact the primordial progenitor. The magic required was too ancient for it to be remembered, even by the gods. But Hera was an erudite, her thirst for revenge driving her to uncover the darkest secrets of existence.

"Tell me, why is my husband trying to raise a mortal to divinity? What is the truth behind Tartarus´s veil being broken?"

"The balance in Tartarus remains the same. The inescapable abyss has not been disturbed in eons, but I can sense a will to breed discord in the world. Be careful, queen of the heavens. The king acts mostly on a whim, but such a decision is rarely unplanned."

Hera pondered on the answer of the oracle for a moment. Zeus was impulsive and arrogant, but he was not an idiot. He knew the implications of the ancient ritual, and the fact he was so keen on getting all gods involved so the ascension would be guaranteed and a new deity on earth could be born meant only one thing.

"It seems you already know the answer, my child. Look within yourself and act fast. Your time is running out."

The doppelganger then closed its robe and was consumed by the mirrored pool on its feet, leaving Hera alone to meditate on her next move. The words of the oracle resonated in her mind. She could beat her husband in his own game, winning a powerful ally in the process that could help her once and for all to enact her revenge on the king of the gods. Most importantly, she could not let Zeus acquire any more power. The rivalry between her three male siblings was the cause of many disasters in the past, and she couldn´t let the celestial realm suffer due to the quarrel between the gods.

Hera then pulled out the golden sharp head of an arrow from her robes. It was the artifact the bastard Heracles had used to try and harm her with. She held her palm on top of the mirror pool and slid it open with the weapon. Bright golden drops of ichor fell to the molten crystal, and it started glowing as bright as a star. The queen was going to find a knight worthy of Olympus, and she was going to use him as a conduit to spill out her hatred against her husband. Flying in the distance, Hermes witnessed the queen´s spell and heard what Chaos said. Could it be that his father was deceiving everyone? Or was this another of the goddess of heaven´s many antics to move against Zeus?

Dr. Richie Couccou was not having a good day. He woke up too late, he dropped his coffee on his lap on his way to work and was faced immediately with the plethora of problems his patients bombarded him with. Being a psychologist was the dream of his life, wishing to help people find their way through life with the least amount of suffering possible. His specialty was marriage counseling, so he wasn't unfamiliar with the burden marital life could bring. Adulterers, narcissists, abusers, addicts, pathological jealousy, Dr. Couccou had seen it all. When he imagined his life as a young professional freshly out of university, he imagined himself mapping the human psyche and developing exciting new theories that would laurel him with the recognition of his most prestigious peers, only to discover that the academic pathway in his profession leads mostly to a dead-end in careers. His lack of initiative and his unwillingness to take risks pushed him more and more to financial security instead of spiritual fulfillment.

In the end, he specialized in marriage counseling, which was where the money was, in an affluent neighborhood in the outskirts of San Francisco. Couples could put on a very convincing façade of stability, but deep inside the relationships grew rotten with remorse and frustration. The young doctor still conserved an altruistic nature, which when combined with his innocent idealism produced a very professional therapist who cared for his patients and tried his best in finding the best outcome for them. Besides, he couldn't complain about his own life. Living close to a more liberal city allowed him and his husband to live as freely as they pleased, together with a beautiful house and an expensive sedan to complete Richie´s suburbia fantasy.

The young couple had married just a couple of years ago when Richie finished his professional formation. The 25-year old men were madly in love with each other and decided to take the next step and move in together. Mario, his husband, was originally from Honduras and had come to the U.S. to work as a model and an aspiring actor. They met in a club during one of Richie´s very few nightly adventures, and they both hit it off immediately. Mario was everything Richie had hoped for in a man: attentive, charismatic, charming, and very attractive. His job as a model kept him in top shape constantly, in contrast to the young therapist whose body was never awe-inspiring, to begin with, and had only withered more and more due to a poor diet and a sedentary lifestyle. At first, he wondered why Mario was with him, but his new lover´s romantic attention just worked their way into his young heart.

Now just a few weeks shy of reaching the age of 30, Dr. Couccou was settled in a marriage that kept him happy, and had the financial security to live a comfortable life. All those thoughts crossed his mind every time he heard another tragic story about a failed relationship, keeping him sane for the most part and away from the abyss of depression, to which he was prone. Session after session made the man grow more impatient, nervously waiting for the day to end so he could drive home and celebrate his anniversary.

He finished his work schedule for the day on time as usual, and after the routine paperwork, he hopped in his car and drove back home. He remembered to pick up some flowers and a nice bottle of wine to celebrate the special occasion together with his husband. He arrived at the two-story family home just a few minutes after seven, like a clockwork. The sun was already setting down painting the sky in a romantic shade of red. He enthusiastically opened the door with a bouquet of lotus flowers on one hand, and an expensive bottle of wine under his elbow, only to be greeted by dead silence inside his home. The lights in the whole house were off, along with the kitchen stove and the set of candles he picked up at Bath and Bodyworks to illuminate this special evening. Richie hung his keys and left his presents on the dining table, noticing the open envelope of Mario´s accepted citizenship application. Another reason to celebrate, he thought.

"Honey?"

He asked, looking nervously for his husband.

"No. Not again."

He held back the tears in his eyes, as he hesitantly headed towards the garage. Once he opened the door his suspicions were confirmed. His husband´s Range Rover van was gone, so that meant he wasn't in the house. Richie then went back to the formal living room and left himself to be swallowed by the lavish leather couch.

"Maybe he went to get groceries. Maybe he ran late in the gym. Maybe he had an accident and ended up in the hospital."

Anxiety overwhelmed the therapist, the thoughts praying on his fears like hungry vultures. Richie was a prodigiously intelligent man, his only flaw being his foolish naivety. This same couch was a witness when the same scene happened a year ago. The hunky Latino lover he had for a husband wasn't very thoughtful when it came to dates, so this hadn't been the first time he forgot about their anniversary. Last year´s night ended with Richie begging his husband for forgiveness, his only mistake being that he started an argument about Mario´s recent lack of attention. The Latino heartthrob had a way of twisting every problem to his favor, constantly gaslighting Richie into believing he was being too needy and demanding, or that he spent too much time at work. Either way, it always ended with Richie bending to the whims of his husband. Last year Mario had made the generous offer of cooking a very nice dinner for both of them next time they celebrated their anniversary. But judging by the empty dark kitchen, he had forgotten once again.

Richie let out a loud sigh, as he went upstairs heading directly to their shared bedroom. Their bed was not made, and there was an explosion of bright clothes hanging off of every corner of the room, hinting that Mario had gone off partying again, as usual, trying out every outfit in the closet before heading out. The doctor's husband loved the nightlife, leaving Richie staying at home so he could go partying and enjoy the benefits the big city offered. The tired man headed then into the bathroom for his routine before bed. He took off the ill-fitting suit he was wearing, along with his thick-rimmed glasses, and splashed some water on his face. When he put them back on, he was greeted by a vision he was constantly trying to avoid.

He looked with sadness at his body. His naturally thin frame was filling up with some fat, forming a small belly and starting to accumulate on his chest. His love handles were being pushed out by the elastic band on his boxer shorts. His arms and legs were just as slim as they were when he finished puberty, unable to gain the coveted muscle mass every gay man was chasing. His husband signed him up for his gym as an idea to spend more time together, only to be completely ignored once the hunky social butterfly found his usual friends and left him on his own. Prey to his insecurities, he stopped going altogether, much to his husband´s annoyance who wanted him to get in shape. His blond hair was dry and messy, styled in a boring way. He barely had any beard growth on his round, to begin with, unable to hide the soft jawline and little chin, and the one he had was very patchy and light blond, so it was practically invisible. Otherwise, he wasn't a very hairy man, just sporting unkempt armpit and pubic hair, along with some sparse sprinkling around his nipples. His blue eyes were the only feature he kind of liked on himself, being an icy blue that was magnified by the thick glasses he wore all the time.

Richie put on his pomegranate printed pajamas and got into bed. The emotional shock from earlier had exhausted him, along with the stress of his intense work schedule. He then turned to the side to take off his glasses and turn off his bed lamp when he caught a glimpse of the beautifully framed photo of his husband and him on their wedding day. Richie was a bit taller standing at 6 feet and was wearing a black tuxedo that hung off his even thinner body. His soft features shining with happiness. Next to him stood the hunk he married, his beautiful brown skin contrasting with the white tuxedo Richie had bought him for that day. The elegant garment was taut over the Latino man´s body, showing off the volume of his arms and the prominence of his chest. It was tapered to his thin waist, which made him look like he jumped out of a GQ magazine cover. His raven black hair was beautifully styled back, and he was beaming a white smile at the camera. The handsome man was truly a sight to behold. Richie didn't like looking at his reflection because it was a painful reminder of the abyssal difference between them. No wonder Mario never wanted to get in bed with him anymore. He took off his glasses and closed his eyes, unable to fall asleep with a million worries circling on his head.

"Good morning amor"

Richie opened his eyes to the deep melodious voice of his husband. Mario was standing next to his bed holding up a box of chocolates shaped like a heart. Richie put on his glasses and managed to squeeze out a faint smile. He then extended his arm and accepted the gesture without saying a word. His husband remained unfazed, beaming a bright smile, and acting with his usual confidence.

"You didn't wait for me last night. The boys from the gym invited me to a birthday party, so I couldn't say no. Still, I brought some pizza for us to eat late only to find you sleeping!"

The Latino hunk then pouted like a little kid making emphasis on the last word.

"I know better than to wait for you to get home Mario. Besides, you arrived at 3 in the morning, high as a kite. I really thought you remembered this time."

Mario could feel his husband´s sadness in his voice, but he didn't let his facial expression change.

"I still brought you dinner as I promised. I even got your favorite pizza. Come on, let's go have breakfast. I have a photo shooting later and I cannot be late again."

Richie sighed and got out of bed to get ready. He then joined his husband in the kitchen who was sporting one of his usual skintight tank tops that made the defined muscles in his body pop out more.

"The pizza is in the fridge."

He said taking another spoonful of oatmeal without even raising his gaze from his phone. Richie then took out a cold slice and sat down on the opposite end of the kitchen island. He stared at the pepperoni pizza on his plate, unable to take a bite. He took a deep breath and looked at his husband.

"Mario, we need to talk."

The hunk barely raised his eyes from the screen, giving Richie an impatient glare. Even when he was annoyed, he remained strikingly handsome, with sharp masculine features decorated with a dense black beard.

"Does it really have to be now? I´m already running late amor. We can talk when I get back from work."

"No, it has to be now."

Said Richie fighting the breaking of his voice. He had a lot of feelings, but he had to remind himself of his practices at work and how to emote his thoughts without overwhelming his partner.

"I think you´re not paying a lot of attention to me, and that makes me feel sad. Remember when we first moved into this house and had that candlelit dinner on the floor? I miss that Mario. The romantic detail Mario."

Mario´s gaze remained fixed on his husband, meditating the best way to squirm out of the problem. It wasn´t the first time he messed up an important date, but he could always count on his husband´s weak character to do the trick for him.

"I´m sorry amor. I´ve been stressed with work now that my career is finally taking off. My diet is also killing me, making me tired and irritable. You should have a bit of consideration with me. Besides, I brought you your favorite pizza. I remembered. It's just that you know how important these parties are for networking amor. And you´re always at work. You never come to the gym with me. The least you could do is being more comprehensive."

He managed to finish his monologue with a little tear under his eye. Richie fell victim once again to his husband´s bulldozing charm. His bitterness turned quickly into concern for his hard-working husband, who just wanted to make his dream come true. He stood up and headed towards the hunk´s back, embracing his muscular body tightly.

"I´m sorry love, I had no idea you had that much on your head. I´ll take you to dinner tonight, to that fancy place you like."

Mario smiled triumphantly, knowing there was no sin his pushover of a husband was not going to forgive.

"If you really want us to go then fine."

Richie jumped excitedly at the prospect of having a romantic evening with his man again. The sorrow in his heart turned again to the blind happiness that had imprisoned him for a long time. He took his briefcase and kissed his husband´s cheek, who winced a bit at the gesture.

"I'll pick you up at eight."

He said as he headed outside for his car. Mario remained sitting down eating his oatmeal impassively, completely dismissing his husband´s nice gesture.

Richie could barely keep his excitement in check during his day at work. He responded with automatic answers during his sessions, his mind wandering through all the possible outcomes of the night. Mario did care for him, and that made him very happy. It was ironic the best marriage counselor in town couldn't see the shipwreck his marriage was. The therapist remained oblivious to all the red flags life was throwing at him constantly, in the hopes that everything was a product of his overanalyzing mind. He never had anyone like Mario before, his few past relationships being sacrificed to achieve his dream profession. That is why he was so self-conscious about spending so much time at work and not paying enough attention to his handsome man. But this night was going to be different. He was going to take his husband for a nightly stroll on the boardwalk after dinner, and then home for hopefully more intimate marital activities.

His last patient for the day canceled, leaving Richie with two hours to go back home and prepare for the evening. He even made a stop at the mall to buy a luxurious watch for his husband, to surprise him along with his regular anniversary gift. He bought a lotus flower bouquet again and rushed to his home to get ready. This time his husband´s car was parked on the driveway, so he was sure Mario was inside. He stealthily went inside, only to be greeted by an empty ground floor again.

"He must be upstairs."

Said Richie for himself while he quickly hid the expensive presents and quietly headed up the stairs. But as soon as he arrived on the top floor, his blood froze inside his veins as he heard giggles and whispers coming from the furthermost door. He felt vertigo as the hallway appeared to extend, separating him from his bedroom. He approached the ominous door quietly, his heart sinking further down with every step.

"I swear I heard something."

Said an unknown deep voice inside the room. Richie stood in front of the door, unable to grab the knob and see with his own eyes what had been written on the wall for a very long time.

"I told you, he never comes home earlier. Stop being such a pussy. I´ll go downstairs and check so you don't get distracted anymore."

Richie saw the doorknob turn in slow motion, only for the door to open aggressively. The doctor stared then at the half-naked image of his husband, his brown skin shining with sweat. The hunk couldn't keep his cool this time, widely opening his eyes, completely speechless. Both stood in front of each other for an instant in complete silence. Richie diverted his gaze to look inside his bedroom. He saw another muscular man behind Mario, recognizing him as one of the personal trainers working in his husband´s favorite gym. Mario was the first one to break the silence, managing to squeeze out a few nervous words.

"Richie, amor. I know it looks bad, but I can explain."

The doctor didn't wait for another second, storming down the hallway and out the front door. He started his car and sped away from his once safe haven. He couldn't spend another second in there, feeling breathless and heavy. He just needed to get away as soon as possible.

A storm of feelings quickly mined what was left of his rationality. He suddenly recognized all the signs. The late-night escapades, the forgotten details and the general apathy his husband emanated suddenly became beacons for Richie, illuminating the ruins of his falsely happy marriage. His insecurities bubbled up, making him hate himself for even considering that what happened was his fault. He had this talk almost daily with his patients. But he still couldn't let go of the feeling that he simply wasn't enough for Mario.

He stopped at a red light and looked to the back of his car. His untouched gym bag laid on the backseat, almost taunting him for his lack of discipline. If he made an effort to keep up with his gym obsessed husband, none of this would've happened. In the middle of his crisis, he made the absurd choice of heading to the gym. He thought that maybe if Mario saw him there, he would think Richie was trying to be attractive for him, and he wouldn't have the necessity of looking for pleasure somewhere else.

It was already dark when he made it to the 24-hour fitness center. The upscale gym had everything necessary to train a professional bodybuilder, and then some more. The sleek interior with shiny chrome finishing sported mirrored walls on all sides of the establishment, including the reception. The doctor couldn't escape the haunting image of his reflection, no matter where he tried to hide. He nodded with courtesy towards the young clerk checking the patrons in and headed to the dressing rooms. He tried his best in avoiding eye contact with anyone, so no one could see his red eyes or swollen face product of the intense night he was having, and quickly changed into his simple workout clothes, grabbed his headphones, and headed to the training floor.

He instantly regretted his decision in coming to the gym, as he stood there in the middle of the training ground with no idea where to start. Mario had never actually explained to him how to work out with weights, and he never dared to ask any of the trainers that roamed around the room. An infinity of machines of all types and sizes decorated his surroundings, along with four giant mirrored walls that gave the impression of an infinitely big area. Big men paraded around like peacocks, preening their bodies and flexing in front of their reflection. Groups of girls and teenagers chatted next to the machines and the big water fountain where people could refill their drinks. It was an entirely foreign ecosystem for the nervous doctor, who carefully made his way to the free weights area.

He looked at all the big men pumping iron all around him, their sweaty bodies practically bursting out of their tight clothes. He then turned around to face the inevitable. The mirrored wall reflected all of the doctor's miserable existence once again. His graphic tee depicting a cartoonish cow was snug against his midsection, and his black shorts made his legs look even thinner. He pondered in his sadness for a while, reflecting on how little he was in comparison to his husband. No wonder he looked for someone else.

But something happened once Richie turned around to grab the lightest pair of dumbells around. He thought for an instant he saw his reflection blink just before diverting his gaze. He put the dumbells down once again to examine his reflection closely. A wicked smile formed on the doctor´s soft face, completely contrasting with his innocent eyes. Richie felt a chill go down his spine, as he immediately recoiled from the mirror, only for a hand to come out and pull him towards it. The hard mirror of the surface rippled like water, and the doctor soon found himself in an identical mirrored room. All equipment, towels, and water bottles were there, except for the patrons. The new training area was empty, except for Richie, who instantly went back to the original mirror. He could still see the people walking outside, but when he tried to knock on the glass and ask for help, no one realized he was there. His increasingly panicked screams echoed through the big empty hall.

"Why aren't you a nervous one?"

He heard a voice talk to him from his back. It sounded like his own, only with a rasp metallic cling to it. He turned around and went white in fear as he saw an exact copy of himself staring back. They were even dressed the same. The only difference was the most disturbing part of that living nightmare: the eyes. The doppelganger sported a pair of mirror eyes, which gave it a supernatural look.

"Wha-at are yo-ou?"

Stuttered the terrified doctor slowly walking backward until his back hit the glass. The reflection smiled broadly; its sinister mirror eyes fixed entirely on Richie.

"I´m you, or better said I´m the worst part of you. The one that haunts you every time you look at yourself. The one who blinded you from the truth. The one that represents the shackles of your pathetic existence."

Richie fought the tears in his eyes and was able to muster a glimpse of courage, answering with all the aggressiveness he could muster.

"That's not true! You don't exist, you´re just a product of my own trauma. I must have hit my head with a weight or something."

The reflection cackled loudly, its cold voice breaking like a tuning radio.

"This is exactly why he cheated us now. Your passiveness, your naivety, and of course your appearance drove him away. But look at me, look at us. Who thinks someone like that would want to be with someone like us? Damn, a Ph.D. in psychology and you´re still as stupid as an infant. You must feel pretty miserable. We wasted so many years of study for nothing."

Richie looked down, the tears finally rolling from his eyes. The monster was right, he was stupid. The signs were there, signs he would´ve recognized on anyone else's relationship. But things got different once it was personal. What was clear turned opaque, as his naiveness drove him to excuse everything he saw and felt.

"Don´t cry! You don´t deserve pity. It is your fault we're miserable, but this situation can change."

The doctor looked at his doppelganger once again. A bright halo of light seemed to flicker around him, making the monstrous eyes glimmer with a golden hue from time to time.

"I was sent here as a catalyst for change. There is someone interested in our innate potential. But first, you must shatter. We can finally put a stop to your insecurities, and be free."

A bright flash of light beamed out of the doppelganger´s eyes, completely blinding Richie for an instant. The air felt heavy, humming with energy and the temperature started rising. The light was gone as soon as it came, leaving the doctor unable to see for a couple of seconds. He took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes slightly annoyed at the inconvenience, blinking frantically until the blur around him reformed into the weight room. The creature was not in front of him anymore. He looked around, only to find it standing next to one of the bench presses. He approached his double, his face contorted with an exasperated look.

"What the hell was that? I almost went blind! And what do you mean by shattering?"

He asked angrily, his former nervous demeanor replaced by new assertive behavior. He felt animosity towards the creature for trapping him inside this trick room. A new aggressive defense mechanism triggered by hearing the doppelganger´s plan for him.

"Nothing, forget it. As you are now, we´re completely useless for our lady."

Richie clenched his fists tightly, as the light annoyance started turning into sheer anger, an emotion completely unexplored for him. The doctor was usually very calm and passive, rather bending to other people's will to avoid confrontation than approaching issues with an aggressive attitude. But something about the creature in front of him made his blood boil, but he couldn't put his finger on the reason yet.

"What lady!? Besides, I´m not useless"

His angry remarks echoed through the empty halls of the mirror world. The doppelganger smiled knowing the doctor was being lured right where it wanted him to.

"You are useless, there is no question about it. Let´s do a little bet. Prove you're not a failure, and I´ll let you out of here."

The doctor squinted his eyes, giving the creature a suspicious look. But it might be his only chance of getting out of there, so he reluctantly decided to go along with it.

"Fine, what do you want?"

His double then pointed at the bench press; its eerie mirror eyes fixated on Richie´s slightly confused expression.

"Show me we´re not weak. We came to the gym fleeing from the problems you were too weak to face on your own. That is what caused this whole problem. If you want my help you have to earn it."

Richie stood nervously next to the bench. He had never been able to train with weights before, so having his freedom be conditioned on such a test was terrifying, but he didn't see another way of escaping. The people outside were completely oblivious to what was happening inside the mirror, so the only chance of getting out was beating his double in its own game. He laid then on the machine, unsure about how to continue. The creature scowled at him, lifting the barbell and throwing it on his arms.

"You're such a worm. Pathetic."

Richie´s anger returned, fueling his strength. With some effort, he lowered the empty barbell to his chest, and pushed it back up with all his strength, putting it back in its place. He looked at his double expectantly, but the creature's face remained with the same expression of disgust.

"Is that all you got?"

The roof started filling up with thick golden vapor. It looked like ink being dropped in a glass of water. Small tendrils descended towards them, picking up two 45-pound plates and putting them on each side of the barbell. Richie opened his eyes incredulously. That amount of weight would certainly crush him, permanently ending the possibility of escaping. But judging by the doppelganger´s expectant gaze, he sighed and lowered himself back on the bench. His face went red with the effort from pushing the bar out of its base, holding it above his chest. A little droplet of sweat dripped down his forehead.

"What are you waiting for, pussy? Do it."

"I'm not a pussy…"

Grunted Richie as he once again lowered the bar with all his might. He then tried to push it back up, only for the barbell to remain static above his chest. The scared doctor started panicking, completely sure this was going to turn into his grave. But then, all the insults the reflection had thrown at him came back into his head, breeding a violent emotion that provided the energy he needed. With an angry grunt, he started lifting the bar slowly. He felt like his chest was on fire, each muscle fiber screaming in agony as the barbell completed its route and was left back in its base, only for the tendrils to load another six plates on it.

"You disgust me. Again."

Richie didn't even bother to discuss this time, as the violent emotions in his head slowly took control over him. He grabbed the bar with fury and pushed it over his chest with a roar. As the bar fell, the muscles in his chest expanded a bit to the sides, and when he pushed it back up, the pectorals rose a few inches. He then proceeded to repeat the movement, each rep adding mass to his chest like inflating cantaloupes. Once he was done, he put the bar back on its place with a heavy groan and got up from the bench. The evil reflection smiled as the doctor got out of his trance and realized what had just happened to him. He touched the now-massive muscles hanging from his chest, his white t-shirt strained to the maximum, deforming the cartoon on the front. His pectorals twitched with newfound power, his enlarged nipples rubbing against the fabric sticking out like thumbs.

"What happened to me?"

The doppelganger didn't say a word and simply moved towards the squat rack. Richie stood up, tumbling due to his center of gravity changing drastically, and followed the creature. The barbell was already loaded with two plates. The doctor stared at his reflection once again, only to find the same disgusted sneer.

"Do it again you pussy."

The feelings of anger kept bubbling out of Richie. He got under the bar, completely unsure of how to move without falling back. As soon as he got into position, he returned to his trance-like state, performing a squat with perfect form. The bones in his legs cracked and lengthened slowly, along with his feet, which grew gigantic to provide a better base for the exercise. He then proceeded to complete the set, each repetition slowly adding inches to his frame. The vertebrae in his back cracked and elongated, each joint growing stronger to support his now towering frame. When he finished, he was more than half a foot taller, his overstretched t-shirt now looking more like a sports bra containing his herculean chest, and his shorts riding up almost to his crotch. He then threw a sneer at his impassive reflection, which stood there only smiling.

"You're still weak. We didn't deserve someone like Mario."

"Shut up!"

Roared Richie. The golden tendrils then loaded the bar with enough weight to put it well above 300 pounds. The furious doctor then got under the bar and grasped it with both of his hands. He then pushed it up with all his might. The veins on his temples popped out, as his face went red like an apple again. The bar then slowly budged, unhanging itself and resting on the doctor´s slim shoulders. It was marvelous to behold those toothpicks he had for legs support such a monstrous amount of weight. Concentrating on the fiery rage in his stomach, Richie started going down. The muscle fibers in his legs were burning, unable to keep up with the amount of power being demanded from them. As a result, they started to quickly multiply, leaving the doctor with two slightly thicker legs once he finished the first repetition.

But the real change was just starting. He then started going down and up again, his legs working like heavy-duty pistons carrying a massive amount of weight. Each pump added muscles to his thighs, which grew bigger than most men´s waists. The deep divide of his quadriceps etching itself painfully into the muscles, making the skin covering them look paper-thin. His ass swelled so big it looked like it was defying gravity, swallowing the now tiny black shorts and providing the beastly strength he was needing. His calves grew bigger than football to stabilize Richie´s increasing mass. Even his feet grew muscular. During the last repetition, the strain was so much, he felt his legs were dipped in molten metal from the sheer output of energy. He felt his knees buckle, as he felt himself falling on his back. The now-massive cushion he had attached to his rear attenuated the fall.

The doppelganger then let out a crackling cruel laugh. The doctor came out of his trance again, unsure of how to move his much larger lower limbs. He was sweating profusely, the white t-shirt now completely translucent showing the deep divide between his humongous chest. Tears fell down his reddened cheeks, completely overwhelmed by the situation he was in.

"Please let me go. I don't want this. I beg you."

His double then stopped laughing and barked back at him in that metallic voice.

"Beg of me? We don't beg, we demand. You will keep us drowning in misery. Is that what you want?!"

The doctor's painful memory then entered his head once again. A lonely childhood, an unfulfilled dream, and heartbreaking betrayal. His eyes pulsed for an instant in a bright golden color. He managed to get up and sneered back at his reflection, hatred once again taking over him.

"No. I'll stop the misery."

"Then you know what you must do."

He then approached the bar, which was already loaded again by the mysterious force in the room putting it above 500 pounds. He positioned himself to do a deadlift, grasping the bar tightly with both hands and pulling with all his might. Sweat practically cascaded out of every pore and thick veins bulged and pulsated on his neck, and the straining muscles grew. His growl slowly went down a couple of octaves as his Adam's apple grew along with the rest. Two giant triangles grew on the back of his neck, connecting it to his shoulders and leaving the doctor with a pair of massive traps.

The muscles in his back rippled as new nerve connections were made recruiting more mass for the movement. Two thick poles grew along his spine, spreading outgrowth to his lats. The back of the man grew so much, it looked like the spread wingspan of an albatross, each hill and valley carving themselves like on marble. The small t-shirt didn't stand a chance as it fell in tatters to the ground, exposing the sweat coated skin of the man´s back.

As he pulled the bar above his knees, the muscle in his midsection started burning to stabilize the movement. The fat on his stomach melted away, replaced by a convex thick eight pack bulging with veins. His lower back developed strongly, forming an upwards arrow between the muscles.

Once he was able to stand straight, he quickly jerked down to push the bar from underneath. The burning sensation spread to his arms, as his hands grew around the bar grabbing it with a vice-like grip. The forearms formed thick muscular columns with more than enough strength to hold the lift, veins quickly traveling towards his upper arms like a complicated crossroads. The fibers on his biceps ripped and grew rapidly, quickly inflating the biceps to a formidable size. Iron triceps etched themselves to the hinder part of his arms, pumping and growing bigger the more the bar was lifted. Lastly, as he pushed the bar over his head, his shoulders raised and rounded out like big medicine balls, condemning Richie to a life unable to go straight through doors.

With a mighty roar, he put the bar in its place, panting exhaustedly. The man inside the squat rack was unrecognizable, having almost doubled his body mass in lean muscle. The only vestige of his old self remained his soft rounded face, along with his icy blue eyes, which squinted when the wave of pain woke him up from his trance. The doppelganger stared amused at the new Richie, its mirror eyes gleaming with a golden glow.

"Well, this is definitely what I had in mind. We're still not quite there though. You remain a pathetic wuss inside."

Richie looked at his practically naked body and was left speechless. He was completely terrified of what happened to him. This monster had completely ruined his life. He clenched his fists in anger, while he slowly walked towards the creature.

"Look at what you did to me. I'm a freak. I´ll never be able to get back to my life."

The creature looked at him mockingly, smiling cruelly at its creation. Richie´s anger only kept rising until everything else other than his double disappeared from his vision. He took out his glasses, crunching them with his fist. His new body bulged menacingly with new strength.

"Do we want to get back to that life? To be deceived and betrayed? No. We hate Mario, but we also hate ourselves."

Richie thought for a second about what the creature said. It was right in saying he hated Mario, and he hated himself for being weak, for not being enough. But now he was enough. He looked at his body and felt each muscle fiber vibrating with new power. He then looked at his double, which was a physical reminder of his past and the painful betrayal.

"No, I hate you. For being weak. For keeping me down."

The creature glared at the muscular titan towering over it, now inches away from its frail body towering over him. It produced one last cruel smile knowing its purpose had been fulfilled.

"Then you know what you must do. Pussy."

Richie raised his fist with a deafening roar and struck his old self-right in the face. The creature then exploded in a million mirror shards which remained suspended in the air and released the contents of its vessel. A glowing blob of ichor was left floating in the place of where the monster once stood. The doctor stared dumbfounded at the thing he had in front of him. The golden vapor floating on the ceiling then condensed into the liquid, and it started emitting a powerful light that mesmerized Richie. He then moved forward to touch the liquid.

As soon as his fingers made contact with it, the blob glued itself into the hands of the doctor, who then woke up again from the trance for the last time. He screamed in panic as the golden substance traveled up his massive arm, coating it in glimmering reflective gold. The rest of his body got quickly invaded by the liquid, leaving his face for last. His scream was then drowned once the substance entered his throat. He felt the scorching heat of the liquid melting away his mind. Memories of love and romance, from hope and peace, bled out of every pore, being sucked away by the golden coating. The heat then intensified the anger in the pit of his stomach and raised it to his mind, corrupting it. Feelings of hatred and arrogance melted into his brain, molding a new persona out of the doctor.

The liquid then started to melt away his features, making his head grow inside the golden suit. The bones in his jaw cracked and squared off, leaving a prominent glass-cutting jaw behind. His nose broke and rearranged, expanding to a more masculine form. His forehead grew larger, hooding his eyes and printing a permanent scowl on his face. Once the change was completed, the liquid started to seep into the pores in all of his body, stimulating the growth of thick dark body hair that slowly revealed itself the more the coat absorbed into the skin. His armpits and pubes grew thick hair, marinated with his newly acquired masculine essence. A thick treasure trail escalated to a dense covering of his pecs. The liquid on his face then condensed into his eyes, revealing a full bushy beard. His blond hair had grown long on top disappearing on the sides and darkened to a dark shade of brown. As the final drops of the liquid were absorbed into his eyes, he was left with a pair of solid gold eyes, the anger condensing as a red halo surrounding his pupils.

The new man then cracked his neck and flexed his body. He felt incredibly powerful, more than any mortal could ever be. He looked at the mirror and saw his rugged hyper-masculine face staring back at him. He looked very menacing. And he liked it. The titan relished in the satisfaction that gave him in being an intimidating wall of muscle. He had no desire of being nice to anybody because he could bulldoze his way over anything to get whatever he wanted. He was the biggest dick on the planet. Dr. Richie Coccou was reborn in the form of Richard "Dick" Coccou.

"Speaking of dicks."

Grumbled the new goliath as he grabbed his manhood over the makeshift thong he was still wearing. The gold liquid started coming out again of his palm, burning away the garment and coating the already enlarging member. The former small penis then inflated to a menacing size, just like his owner, until it reached the size of a small children´s arm. His balls grew proportionally, like two small pomegranates hanging from a branch. The titan grumbled with pleasure as he played with the large head.

"You´ll have plenty of time for that later, my child."

Dick then looked around attentively, like a predator hearing a small branch snap. The broken glass shards floating around him condensed into a body size mirror in front of him. Out of the deep infinite loop appeared a beautiful woman. Her shapely silhouette surrounded by a bright halo. And her glowing gold eyes cold as ice. Dick smiled, all kinds of lascivious thoughts crossing his mind.

"Do not get distracted by primal necessities my child. You have a mission to accomplish. I´m Hera, queen of the heavens and your ruler."

Dick´s mind was suddenly filled with awe and respect for his progenitor, having been born out of her own blood. He kneeled before her and bowed his head.

"What can I do for you, my queen?"

Hera smiled, very pleased with the results of her spell.

"I gifted you with divinity for one reason only my child: to kill my husband. You know the sorrow of a broken heart, and have a thirst for revenge of your own. You will get your chance, but afterward, your destiny will belong to me. Meet me on Mount Olympus in thirteen days. I will make sure you ascend."

With those last words, the mirror shattered, and Dick was left alone with his hatred. Hera´s work was impeccable, fully turning the intense loyal love of a mortal into her own personal thug. And Dick was the spitting image of a muscular thug. The image of his still husband came to his mind, along with an unquenchable thirst for revenge. He smiled and knew immediately what to do next.

The last patrons left the 24-hour gym at high hours of the night. Mario had been looking desperately for his husband all night without success. He looked around the places he thought he frequented most, like his office or his favorite pizza restaurant. But the meek therapist was nowhere to be found. The last way to look for it was the gym, although Mario was going more out of pure necessity than of real worry for his husband.

He got into the establishment and found it empty. It was unusual to find people after midnight, but not even the janitor was around. An eerie presence haunted the many mirror walls, making the usually cocky Latin hunk feel uneasy. He looked into the dressing room hoping he would find his husband there, but there was no one inside. He shrugged his worries off and thought he´ll find it back home once the tantrum was over. He had to be more careful though, or his citizenship process would be interrupted and he'd have to leave his life there. Richie was nice, but Mario was more into the life he provided other than the man himself.

He stepped out of the locker room and could immediately hear the cold clashing of iron from inside the weight room. Low grunts accompanied the metallic echoes, letting Mario know he wasn't alone in the gym after all. He went inside the room, only to find a behemoth of a man half-naked pumping a monstrous amount of weight on the bench press. A strong musky scent permeated the room, asserting the titan´s dominance over anything that stepped into his dominion. He finished his set and immediately fixed his gaze upon the stud.

"I knew you would come."

His golden eyes completely infatuated Mario, who felt an almost magnetic pull towards the man. He put a hand on his sweat covered giant chest, relishing in the feeling of having such a specimen so close to him. Dick smiled triumphantly, completely aware of the power he now possessed over simple mortals. He grabbed both shoulders of the smaller man with his massive mitts and aggressively pushed him down. Mario was completely enthralled by the intimidating piece of meat he had in front of him. He wanted desperately to please the bigger man, but he was unsure his anatomy would allow it. Dick didn't wait for Mario to prepare, taking his head with both hands and slamming it against his pelvis, impaling the choking stud with his massive endowment. Mario struggled to breathe, tears flowing down his cheeks as big Dick sodomized his face.

"You’re a lousy sucker kid. Let's see if you're a lousy fucker as well."

Said the titan as he lifted Mario like a feather and put him facing down the bench, spreading his legs. Mario already knew what was coming and was glad he was ready. He always found a good fuck or two in the gym at this hour, and this was not going to be an exception. Dick then slammed down the still closed cheeks, impaling his former lover. Instead of feeling the searing pain, he was awaiting due to the sheer size of the manhood, Mario felt incomparable bliss. Every nerve ending in his body was burning with pleasure, his face drooling due to the intense sensations he was feeling. The titan then pumped him full for a while, giving him the best sex, he ever had.

Once it was over, the behemoth took a humongous black shirt that was hanging on a nearby bench and put it on, heading towards the exit. Mario then felt terrible despair, as he ran to the man to not let him go, only to be sent flying away and crashing against a pile of weights. Dick gave him a menacing look, his golden eyes sparkling with anger.

"You will never be able to enjoy intimacy anymore or feel any kind of pleasure. Everything will remind you of tonight, and what can no longer be yours. I will let you live, but the future that awaits you will only be painful. Now, get out of my sight before I change my mind."

His newly acquired divine power gave Dick full power over mortals, including the ability to move the boundaries between pain and pleasure inside them. Mario watched with tears in his eyes as the giant walked forward into a mirrored wall next to the entrance, and was swallowed by it. He had no idea this hateful god was his once pure-hearted husband, corrupted by a jealous´ goddess hatred against the one who had been her greatest lover.

#musclegrowth #transformation #championofolympus

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tvpeongsstuff · 3 years

Text

Supreme Emperor Obiwan Kenobi

New story idea.

After Mustafar Obiwan and vader do not have another run in for a few years. But, the first time they do Obiwan makes one of his distract my enemies while fighting comments. Vader gets distracted and loses again and Obiwan runs away. It keeps happening.

At first vader does not realize what this means until he and one of his henchmen (inquisitors?) get into a fight with Obiwan and Obiwan starts flirting with the henchman like he does when he is fighting his enemies and turns to vader and flirts with vader like he does with his enemies.

Anakin Skywalker, Obiwan Kenobi's padawan/brother/son, realizes that he is now just another sith obsessed with Obiwan. And, that to Obiwan he is no different than Ventress, or Dooku, or Grievous!

He doesn't handle that knowledge well. He goes even more crazy looking for Obiwan. He cannot handle being just anything to Obiwan. He starts looking for ways to increase his power tenfold. He starts training like crazy.

He pays top dollar for holorecordings (old or new no questions asked) of Obiwan fighting against other darksiders, criminals, and imperials. There are a few new videos. If any of them get in a lucky strike, vader makes them fight him. Inquisitors, the criminal underworld, and officers start getting chopped to pieces or killed. The imperials that survive get cybernetic parts. There are also a lot of older videos of Obiwan fighting with other Jedi, especially Anakin Skywalker. Those were supposed to be destroyed after the fall of the Republic. They make him feel...

Unbeknownst to both vader and sidious, the rebellion realize what's happening and start using vader's obsession to get vader to turn his sith fury on the complacent core worlds. They were the ones comming the info lines saying that Obiwan was on X planet or Y planet. Then when vader and his troops show up, they would broadcast the carnage. And, they carry out covert operations on other planets as they know those planets are vaderfree. For example, creating a spy network on Naboo, moving ammunitions through planet A.

The Rebellion recruits Obiwan to their cause. Bail reaches out to him, tells him the plan. They need him to distract vader. It's twofold: They don't want vader getting suspicious and they need vader to keep destroying coreworlds. He needs to be filmed looking heroic, walking through rich districts, passing by Core senators mistresses second homes, in the same are as a new important imperial's kept man (misters?). He is going to be their Katniss Everdeen (an ancient hero). People are going to get hurt but every jedi knows that the good of the many outweighs the good of the few or the one.

It works! If there is a rumor that Obiwan is on a planet, vader shows up with squadrons and tear the area apart, torture people for information, etc. This backfires on him because he razes so many places the empire can't completely censor the videos before they get out. People stop calling in as much, no matter how good the bounty.

Palpatine is at first happy with vader's obsession. He's all, "Give in to the power of the dark side" and he loves cyborgs. But, vader is single minded in his pursuit. It's like he transferred all of the love he had for Obiwan into this chase. Palpatine knows how much Anakin loved Obiwan so...on the one hand let vader find him and kill him, cementing palpatine's rule and ensuring vader's complete loyalty. On the other hand, vader is wrecking core planets and undermining his hold right now.

Sidious orders vader to stop and concentrate on other things. Vader does not listen. He receives a holo showing Obiwan on Naboo visiting Padme's memorial. He freaks out, goes to Naboo, takes the entire 501st and the 212th. He questions the queen. He rips apart members of Naboo's ruling class. He breaks public monuments. His purge troopers pull people out of their homes and beat citizens in the street. All of this is being broadcast galaxy wide.

Naboo's gentry are comming palpatine on his private line complaining and asking him to control his maniac. The rebel broadcast and the regular broadcast are wondering if this new empire is going to keep infringing on the rights of citizens? Are the people hurt by the rampaging vader going to have any recourse? Perhaps they should return to a republic? Sidious can't let this stand. He looks weak. Vader is destroying his home planet and ruining his image.

He leaves Coruscant and goes to Naboo. This was all part of a plan by the rebellion and it worked perfectly. They sneak Obiwan into Coruscant. They needed both vader and the emperor off planet so that no one powerful would be around to sense Obiwan. The rebellion are going to rally support to their cause, build up the capital's spy network, and film holos of Obiwan on planet to play at a later date to embarrass the empire.

On Naboo, vader is mourning at Padme's tomb when sidious catches up to him. The rebellion have set up holo cameras to spy on vader's every move. Breha told them to set up low tech motion detector cameras at the tomb. When the emperor comes in he berates vader and shoots force lightning at him while Vader writhes on the ground and screams in pain. It all gets captured on holo.

S: "I do not care about these morons, Lord Vader. But, you need to get yourself together and stop embarrassing me. Use your grief to channel the power of the dark side!"

Vader (gasping and panting): Yes my master

S: You have been letting Kenobi make a fool of you. Perhaps he is better than you? Perhaps you do not truly want to kill him? Did you forget how he turned on you and cut you down? Do you not want your revenge?

Vader: Yes I want my revenge

Sidious: Good good apprentice. When next you meet pull on the dark side of the force. Show Kenobi what you are capable of. Let him be the one to suffer.

V: Yes master

S: Good we leave at once for Coruscant. Gather your men.

Meanwhile Obiwan had met with senators and businessmen sympathetic to the rebel cause. He's gone down to the lower levels and spread hope amongst the poor and downtrodden. He's used the force to heal. He's filmed at the barracks and the senate. Finally, he's at the jedi temple. Obiwan has been making poignant propaganda films. Now, he has to make one about the fall of the republic and the murder of the jedi. He does. It's heart wrenching.

He talks about life in the jedi temple. He talks about the camaraderie and love all the jedi are raised with, how he didn't realize people thought jedi were baby stealers. He explains that the jedi only took unwanted children, or children whose parents could not help them with their powers. Every jedi who wanted to could leave the order. No one was kept by force. All jedi were educated on their culture and traditions. And, he talks about that final day, the murder of the jedi in the temple, the slaughter of the younglings. . He talks about finding all their bodies after, the futile search for survivors, the desperate he harboured. He cries.

The rebellion thought that they would have more time. The emperor was supposed to stay on Naboo as is his wont and make nice with his fellow men. They did not expect him to come back immediately with vader, two starships full of clone purge troopers, and 7 inquisitors. They realize they cannot get Obiwan off planet. It's too late. Vader and sidious have sensed his presence.

Obiwan makes a decision. He could die trying to escape or he could make a heroic last stand. He has the rebellion set up holo cameras all around the area and go into hiding. He tells them to broadcast his last recording. Hopefully it will rally people to their side when he diies. They have to get themselves to safety. Obiwan knows he has to push vader into killing him quickly. He hides all of his most sensitive information deep behind his strongest shields. Then he meditates. He is as ready as he'll ever be. He has to trust in the force.

Sidious knows that this is the perfect PR opportunity. He has to counteract Obiwan's emotional appeal. He sends Vader with all the troops and inquisitors after Obiwan. Vader knows better than to fail him but back up couldn't hurt. Obiwan must die! He also orders all the empires holos to broadcast the fight throughout the galaxy. He goes to the senate and announces that "there have been reports that the jedi terrorist Obiwan Kenobi has been spotted on Coruscant. Not to worry. Not to worry. I have sent Darth Vader to deal with him. At long last we will be rid of the jedi menace and our glorious empire can finally know peace." This is also broadcast throughout the galaxy from the senate cameras.

The fight starts. It's epic. Obiwan battles Vader and the Inquisitors from the jedi temple to the senate rotunda. He knocks out 3 inquisitors and badly injures 2 more. He catches blaster bolts and directs away from him back to his enemies. He keeps flirting, and making jokes and puns. Vader is enraged. He starts fighting horribly. He loses focus and jumps in the way of his inquisitors. (They already know he's obsessed with Obiwan Kenobi and the suspect if one of them land the killing blow vader will destroy them.) He chops off one of vader's hands.

Obiwan: Did I unhand you? That must burn.

Vader becomes apoplectic. How is Obiwan beating him? Again? He remembers what sidious said and starts pulling on the dark side of the force. Vader is literally pulling all of the darkside energy on Coruscant into him. Here's the thing, there is no true dark side force energy. There is only the force that can be used for dark purposes or light purposes. The way the force is used taints the force around the user. Vader is actually pulling the force away from darksiders like the Sith.

Vader begins the drain Coruscant of its dark energy. He pulls the force out of all the inquisitors that surround him, draining them. This knocks all of them unconscious. He needs more power! He pulls on the dark energy around him that has been clouding the force on Coruscant. He pulls even harder. Several weak dark side senators fall unconscious. Dark side users around the planet start passing out. Still Vader needs more power!

Palpatine feels a drain on his powers. Too late he grasps what's happening; he tries to reach out to vader. "Stop! Stop!" he screams, " Stop this at once Lord Vader!" He tries to raise his shields but he and vader share a connection, sneakily placed there by him while vader was still a child. Usually the connection goes one way. He pushes doubts, fears, dreams, and pain on vader and sits back and enjoys the emotional turmoil. Today vader has blasted that connection wide open and is taking all of the force from him. He falls unconscious.

Obiwan Kenobi can see dark energy flowing into vader. Dark energy from teh inquisitors on the ground, dark energy swirling in from the air, an ocean of dark energy coming to him from the senate. Vadear is swarming in dark energy. Obiwan can feel the turmoil, rage, and hate. It feels like....anakin skywalker throwing a tantrum when he didn't get his own way as a child.

Obiwan knows how to deal with this, probably Anakin's biggest darkest tantrum. He opens the bond he has with anakin a little, looks into anakin, puts the right amount of force into his suggestion and says "Sleep." Vader collapses and Obiwan catches him with the force.

The flow of energy into vader immediately starts to slow down. From their connection Obiwan can sense all the people vader has been sucking dry. If vader stops draining them they will wake up, so Obiwan keeps the flow going.

All this time the battalions have mostly been standing by idly. They were ordered to take shots to incapacitate or distract the jedi, unless he somehow won. Then they were to kill him. They start firing immediately. With Obiwan's focus and the energy of all the darkside at his fingertips Obiwan is able to catch every single bolt blast. He starts moving towards the senate following the ocean of darkness, parting bolts in front of him like he is parting water. Some of the troops try to run up to him to fight him but they get caught and stuck. He is floating vader and the inquisitors behind him. The caught troopers start floating along with them also. As they pass, the bolts fire.

In the senate, chaos reigns. A few senators and the emperor have collapsed. Medics have been called for them. On their screens, Jedi master Obiwan Kenobi has bested Darth Vader and his inquisitors. He is walking through the blaster bolts of thousands of troopers. He has proven himself unkillable and now he is coming straight for them. Some of the weaker members of the senate try running away. Others call out to the Coruscant senate guards to protect them. An enterprising member orders the doors sealed. It makes no difference.

Obiwan Kenobi enters the senate. and jumps to the emperor's hover chair. Vader is hovering behind him still but he has left the inquisitors and the clone troopers at the entrance to the senate. The troopers are still firing at him indiscriminately. He is catching the bolts and directing them to the walls. He looks down at the emperor who is being treated by a medidroid, throws the droid away with the force, and closes his eyes for a few seconds. All the cameras are on him. Every household in the galaxy is watching. This is being projected to every screen on every warship. Imperial officers the galaxy over are watching from their posts.

He opens his eyes

Obiwan: By the ancient laws of this senate, and pursuant to charter 9 as set forth in the old republic, I name myself the vice chair of the senate Obiwan Kenobi. Alpha Tango Abera Cadebera Seven Five Thirteen.

There is a pause. Then a flurry of sound as all of the technology in the senate updates at the same time. The ancient code of the senate computers accepts Obiwan's passcode and turns the full power of the senate over to him. All connected systems update also.

Obiwan: Commanders execute order 4. Cancel order 66 and stop shooting.

All the clones stop shooting.

Obiwan: All powers are hereby handed over to me and whatsoever remains of the Jedi order. I declare myself Supreme Emperor Obiwan Kenobi.

Part 2

#Supreme Emperor Obiwan Kenobi #star wars #fic #fanfic #fanfiction #au #star wars fanfic #fixit #post order 66 #obi wan kenobi #darth vader #sheev palpatine #bail organa

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demonofpuns · 3 years

Text

Some thoughts and ideas on the portrayal of Greek Mythology in Blood of Zeus

So, that show happened. The only good thing I have to say about it is that it’s visually appealing and they’ve cast Claudia Christian. The only reason my sis and I kept watching is because the evil lady was hot and sis wanted to peg Himbo Apollo. (Who, despite his amazing lack of personality, was the only character to remain halfway consistent in it. Also he’s explicitly shown to be bi so he gets bonus points.)

BUT LIKE. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK. Putting this under a cut cause spoilers and shit.

I do want to talk about the gods and their mythology. Like... first of all, Hera was the bad guy. HERA. TO A POINT WHERE SHE AWOKE THE GIANTS TO KILL ZEUS.

Not to mention that the very concept of evil Hera isn’t one that’s just... too cliche. I mean, Zeus cheats on her and fucking rapes most of the women he wants just because he can with his powers (which was canon even in the show), yet she’s the one who’s bad? HE’S A RAPIST. WHY THE FUCK IS HE EVEN THE GOOD GUY.

She wanted to kill the bastard and his mom and hated all of the kids who were not her own. Sure. I do say she is canon like that in Greek Mythology to a point, but seriously? If you already interpret mythology new to the extent this series did, why not make her a fucking better, three-dimensional character instead of... whatever this show did. (She does get bonus points for hot evil lady, but that isn’t enough to weaken my hatred for what this show did.) She’s the goddess of family, for fuck’s sake. What she did? Nope. A modern interpretation of Hera should not be the one punishing women and children for the wrongdoings of her husband.

Here’s a few ideas that would make her character likeable and put emphasis on her family while still being able to be angry at Zeus:

She being the one to legitimize Zeus’ bastards as gods, to show him that she knew what he’d done.

Her sending peacocks (because her animal birds are peacocks, not FUCKING RAVENS) to the women Zeus planned to rape, to watch his every step. If he went for anything even remotely sexual, he’d get attacked. I imagine it’s not nice to get a beaked cock. (Pun intended.)

Asking Zeus how the mothers of his bastards are regularly.

Taking care of her family, even those who are not her own children. Her protecting Heron, Electra and Seraphim instead of Zeus.

Her being allowed to be hurt and mad at Zeus without becoming a murdering crazy woman. (Fucking sexist tropes.) She can still be a little wary around the new sidestep and the new bastard and annoyed at times, but after so long, she should’ve realized that it’s not their fault her husband is like that.

Just as an idea. Next one up: ARES.

He didn’t have much of a personality in the show except that he liked fighting to some point. That being said, he’s also evil. Somehow. Like. I get Ares was unpopular and dangerous, being he was the god of the bad side of war. But please... more dimensions than one to his character, please. He’s together with Aphrodite, for fuck’s sake. She has to see something in him. Here are some ideas:

Ares protecting his brothers in a fight and telling them to run while he took care of the enemy.

Threatening anyone who wants to get at a family member: “You want to get to them? You gotta get through me first.”

Giving the obviously weaker opponent in a fight strength and speed so it would be more fair.

Teaching people to use their anger in a fight well.

Not as much as Hera, but then, he was unimportant in this series. (As much as the other gods, which mostly you even had to guess the names of. The only one I’m sure about is Artemis, because she had a bow, was dressed in silver, and stood next to Apollo.) Next one here: HADES.

So, Hades had 30 seconds of screen time at the end. The big reveal: HE WASN’T NEUTRAL, NOOO, HE WAS EVIL. CAN WE GET. ONE. FUCKING. THING. WHERE. HE. ISN’T. I get him being resentful towards the other gods and Zeus especially because he isn’t wanted on Olympus and has to stick to the underworld and care for the dead. Fine. I get it. But can we get like... him being an okay person?

Allowing a girl to see her killed cat’s soul for one last time to say goodbye.

Playing with Cerberus. In general, Cerberus being a good boy and not a beast that flips when you provoke it.

Loving his wife. There are several stories claiming Persephone went willingly (that being said, those are dubious at best, and if you’re gonna reinterpret mythology, please, please make it less about abduction and rape) - and also, in general. PERSEPHONE. GIVE US MORE OF HER BECAUSE SHE WAS ONE OF THE MOST FEARED AND YET LOVED GODDESSES. THE POTENTIAL.

Him getting regular visits by other gods so he won’t feel abandoned.

Can’t say too much about other gods cause they were non-existent apart from being there and being judgy. The three I did talk about were mostly because I’m fucking sick of always seeing them portrayed as the bad guys. Especially Hera. Some may ask now, if these characters are how I described them, how does the conflict come up?

Hmmm. Okay. Valid question. (I’ll stick this to the relevant plot points that would have to shift, that I do remember. Not all of the story has to be changed that much.) Let’s start with Hera being the one to protect Heron and Electra from Zeus instead of the other way around. She found out he was cheating and she was the one to save and hide them. She gives the advice. She tells him who she is, who he is, and why she did what she did. Heron, confused, leaves. Alexia arc can stay the same, mostly.

Zeus finds Heron. He’s mad at Hera. He gives him the sword (in disguise) so he can fight, still, because he’s his son and destined for something. (Zeus, while he will eventually be bad, is not a one-dimensional evil rapist). Heron finds out who he is. Heron rejects the sword. Fight in the village can stay. Seraphim kills his mom still because Zeus was the one to give out her location because he’s still an asshole and mad at Hera.

Hera tells Seraphim his story and how she protected him. He’s still mad at her for leaving him in the castle. She thinks he can be saved, and tells him about the sword so he can make his revenge easier, to get that part done, so he might be more open to a family then. Seraphim finds out what Zeus did to his mom and him and his hatred shifts. He finds out about the urn of Giants or whatever. Hera tries to stop him, but she can’t.

Hera, Apollo, Hermes and Ares train Heron. Zeus tries to make contact but gets a NOPE. Zeus is a spiteful bitch and wants another woman. Cue the beaked cock. The titans rise. Epic battle. Yada Yada. Zeus dies and it feels good. Hera is an epic queen of the gods, but she’s also sad because she still loved her husband.

HADES IS NOT A BAD GUY.

I know this isn’t perfect or complete, but ffs, I needed to get this said. Most of this has been prompted in a talk with my best friend @kyliafanfiction (thank you for giving me the inspiration to write this out).

/rant

#blood of zeus #greek mythology #greek myth retellings #netflix #blood of zeus hera #tw: rape

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sm-pantheon · 3 years

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SMPantheon AU Information

Greetings, Tumblrer. Can I interest you in my Dream SMP God AU? Yes? Great. Hope you like reading.

I should clarify, before we begin, that there is one rule in the Pantheon: and that is not to date those in other classes. This rule is often broken due to the enforcer's blatant biases, so some people get off scott-free. This rule doesn't apply to dating humans, however, because of the need for classic zeus-style, demigod-bearing hijinks.

THE TRINITY

The creators of the universe, the dreamons. Gods of Chaos. Two have been replaced so far.

Dream XD The creator, the father, the man...god...thing Himself. Yes, that H is capitalized. He was the first god to exist, and every heavenly being stems from Him in some way. He enjoys seeing people suffer. He loves George in secret, even if He hasn't yet reciprocated. He stripped Captain Puffy of some of her power because He deemed the God of Order to be getting in the way of His chaos. His mask has the XD emoticon on it, fittingly enough.

Dream The 'son' of the Trinity, and the enforcer of the love law. His position was once filled by Mexican Dream, before he was demoted for being a dumbass. He later demoted Mamacita for falling in love with Mexican Dream, because they weren't in the same God class anymore. He is notoriously biased and nepotistic with his enforcing. He's also an asshole. His mask has the :) emoticon on it.

Drista The 'holy spirit' of the Trinity. A child. She causes chaos wherever she goes, whether intentionally or not, which makes DXD very proud. Her position was once filled by Mamacita, before she was demoted. She often hangs out with the demigods, most often Tommy. Wherever she goes, hijinks ensue. He mask has the >;P emoticon on it.

GREATER GODS

The most powerful gods, besides the Trinity.

Philza The God of Freedom. A ruthless killer, but a pretty good father figure. He was the first non-Trinity god, and appropriately he matches up with their chaos. He is most notably the god who invented angels, and personally made the first one, Clara. A long time ago he fought with Awesamdude because of their conflicting symbols and won, demoting Sam to the rank of a regular God. His wife is Kristin, a (dead) human, but one time he had a fling with a refridgerator. Confusing times. His sons are Tommy, Tubbo, and Wilbur, and his grandson is Fundy.

Technoblade The God of Violence, often regarded as the 'Blood God'. He is a force to be reckoned with, and you can probably trace him back to every world war in some way. He has a more stoic and calm side, which only Philza and his family can bring out. He acts as sort of an uncle and brother to them, sometimes caring for the kids. He would rather die than have his own, though. He feels an attachment to his friend Ranboo's son, Michael, because they are both pigmen. He plans to train him when he grows hold enough. His pride and joy is the section of the underworld he invented, which is the section where sinners burn eternally.

Antfrost The God of Love. Currently he is taking refuge on earth with his boyfriend Velvet, who is the third archangel. He's never been very friendly with Dream, so it would be inevitable that he would be punished for loving Velvet. To avoid this, he fleed to a small town on earth. He has had a long-time rivalry with Ponk because of his innate hatred of cats.

Foolish Gamers The God of Creation. He is a master builder, and has built the temples of all the Gods. One day, Sapnap, the God of Destruction, challenged him to a fight, and whoever lost would be demoted. He accepted and won, which is why his equal is now lower on the totem pole than he is. He created the earth with Hannah at the command of the Trinity. His best friend is Eret. He often enlists the help of the rock nymph HBomb for help with terraforming and foundation building.

Karl Jacobs The God of Time. He can control time by slowing it down, speeding it up, pausing it, rewinding, etc. However, he is only allowed to use it when the Trinity gives permission. Usually, he just sits around and helps his "not fiancés", Quackity and Sapnap, with their work. He was born soon after Philza.

GODS

Averagely powerful gods.

Sapnap The God of Destruction. He was originally a greater god, but lost a fight to Foolish and gave some power up as a result. He is responsible in part for all the natural disasters of the world.

Awesamdude He was stripped of some of his power by Philza (with assistance from Techno, although he'd never admit it). He acts as a father figure to some of the younger heavenly beings. He created Sam Nook, an altered clone of himself, to be a Nanny for Philza's children. He now takes care of young Fundy and Michael. Loves Ponk in secret.

Badboyhalo The God of Purity. Cannot do wrong, after all he is the only person who actually is dating someone and is following the rule. Has a public record stating he has never sworn. He's highly devoted to his pursuit of holiness... and also Skeppy.

Skeppy The God of Fortune. After all, he's made of diamond. He's a goofball, especially around Bad. He's Bad's best friend/boy friend, B.B.F., as he would say!

Captain Puffy The God of Order. She has always had a rivalry with the Trinity for directly contradicting them with her existence. Because of this, her dates with Niki have to remain a secret, or else she'll be demoted again. Currently she's filling the paws of Antfrost as God of Love until he comes back, or a new heir is born.

Hannahxxrose The God of Nature. She mostly hangs out on Earth, tending to gardens worldwide, but she stays in heaven an ample amount too. She was literally born from Foolish's idea to create nature for earth, which she then assisted in plans for.

JSchlatt The God of Sin. He was originally a Greater God, but he had to be demoted so that the human race wouldn't be absolutely fucked. He's technically in charge of the Underworld, but he doesn't do jack shit down there. He's a raging alcoholic, and is always complaining about heart problems. His best friend is Minx.

Eret The God of Power. He isn't part nymph or anything, but the nymphs respect him and have crowned him as their king. He gladly accepts this role. His best friend is Foolish.

MINIGODS

Less powerful gods.

GeorgeNotFound The God of Beauty. He is fully aware that DXD is in love with him, but he doesn't want to reciprocate for fear of the rule. Still, he hasn't ratted him out... yet. He often hangs out with Sapnap, and he used to hang out with Dream, but he has become more distant as of late.

Mamacita The God of Justice. Also known as Girl Dream. She was removed from the Trinity for loving Mexican Dream after he was demoted. Since she and him still have a lot of power, they've been tasked with running the Underworld. Her mask has the :/ emoticon on it.

Mexican Dream The God of Death. Was removed from the Trinity for generally being a dumbass. He co-runs the Underworld with his Mamacita. He has also adopted Quackity as a twin. His mask has the ;] emoticon on it.

Quackity The God of Humor. He doesn't do a whole lot, just hangs out with his fiancés and his unofficial twin. An absolute jokester.

Slimecicle The God of Joy. A lovable goof who has never done a thing wrong in his life. He has a human wife, Grace, and his son is Connor. He skips around heaven a lot, and often hangs out with the angels.

Ranboo The God of Identity. He is *platonically* married to Tubbo (so Dream can't technically punish him!) He has a son, Michael, and he often hangs out with the demigods. He is considered the least powerful full god. He has a habit of forgetting things and also a habit of stealing all the gender from the other members of the Pantheon.

Niki Nihachu The God of Grace. She mainly takes care of the children along with Sam Nook, and hangs around the water nymphs. Her best friend is Sally.

Jack Manifold The God of Spirit. Previously nicknamed 'Thunder', he is an epic gamer lad. He famously invented 3D glasses and also Britain.

Ponk The God of Bravery. Has had an age-old rivalry with Antfrost because of his fear of cats for eons, and he is quite happy that he's gone. He has a strained love for Sam, which they have to keep secret. Only Sam has seen the rest of his face, under the mask.

DEMIGODS

Half gods, half humans. They are free to travel between earth and heaven.

Tommyinnit The youngest son of Philza and Kristin. A rambunctious teenager who is quite popular among the gods, especially Drista. Often flirts with the goddesses, and always says he has a crush on the Queen of England.

Tubbo The middle son of Philza and Kristin. A chaotic man-child and also goat boy. He is absouletly adored by the Trinity. He has a "platonic" husband, Ranboo, and a son, Michael.

Wilbur The eldest son of Philza and Kristin. A musical prodigy, who is an adult but doesn't quite act like one. He has a wife, Sally the water nymph, and a son, Fundy.

ConnorEatsPants The only son of Slimecicle and Grace. He is a massive sonic fan. If you asked life advice from him, he would tell you that the only problem with being faster than light is that you can only live in darkness.

SEMIGODS

Demigods, except it's not a 50/50 split between God and human. Other races can also be added.

Fundy The son of Wilbur and Sally. He is 25% God, 25% Human, and 50% water nymph, but most importantly, 100% furry.

Michael The son of Ranboo and Tubbo. 75% God and 25% human. He's good friends with Technoblade because of their shared pigman-ness.

NYMPHS

Mythical and elemental creatures.

Sally A water nymph. Married to Wilbur and the mother of Fundy.

HBomb A rock nymph. Often helps Foolish with his builds.

Alyssa An air nymph. She's been wandering around the outskirts of heaven for an eon with Callahan.

Callahan An air nymph. Wandering with Alyssa.

Minx A fire nymph. Best friends with Schlatt and Niki.

ANGELS

Heavenly servants.

Punz First archangel. He's currently the Trinity's bitch, but if you offered him enough money he would absolutely betray them.

Purpled Second archangel. He just follows Punz around and helps him with his tasks. He isn't very devoted to his job. He was the one who came up with the idea of space.

Red Velvet Third archangel. He has fleed heaven with his boyfriend Antfrost. He's working as a baker on earth.

Michael McChill Replacement third archangel. He was created out of a necessity for three archangels, and he isn't very well adjusted. He has no motivation and has only talked to Philza.

Vikkstar The guardian angel of all the demi/semigods. When he's not watching over them, he is hanging out with Lazar.

Lazarbeam The general of the heavenly guard. He slacks off very much, and often hangs out with Vikkstar. Aggravated easily.

Clara The first angel, and the most wise. She is seen as an oracle and is prayed to as frequently as the gods. She often hangs out in Tommy's dreams.

Sam Nook An altered copy of Sam, made to be a nanny to Tommy, Tubbo, and Wilbur. Now he takes care of young Fundy and Michael.

HUMANS

Just like you and me. Except some are dead.

Kristin Married to Philza and mother of Tommy, Tubbo, and Wilbur. When she died, Mamacita offered her a job as the Grim Reaper so that she could hang out with Phil more often.

Grace Married to Slimecicle and mother to Connor. Is the second Grim Reaper, alongside Kristin.

Ghostbur Human clone of Wilbur that Foolish accidentally made when fooling around with the demigods. Has since died and chills out in the animal sector with his sheep, Friend.

Lani Tubbo's sister from his old foster family on earth, who he lives near. Knows everything about everyone in the Pantheon, somehow.

Corpse Husband The janitor of the Underworld. Was a massive sinner when he was alive, but managed to convince Mamacita to let him work for her instead of suffering for eternity.

Mr Beast A generous billionare who runs a private church for the rich in his town. He communes with Karl on the condition that he won't try to gain things for himself using him.

5up A turnip farmer who died and now hangs around Fundy.

.....

Alright. That's it. So. Much. Typing. My fingers hurt. I accidentally deleted all my progress around the halfway point but I persevered. Also, this blog will be used for designs of the AU characters I'll be making. Thanks for reading this far!

Bye. Thanks again.

Oh wait now I have to add a shit ton of tags ughhhh

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intothewickedwood · 3 years

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Once Upon A Time Rewatch: 5x12 Souls of the Departed

Currently reading (well, listening) to The School for Good and Evil Series. It’s so good! It’s basically Wicked the Musical and has a fairy tale element like OUAT. Can’t recommend enough!

I had the weirdest dream last night that Ouat’s Gothel was hiding behind my bed at my old house trying to scare me. She stayed up all night with some blankets, waiting to pounce. Also, she was naked. Jesus Christ, wtf is wrong with my dreams?! I do not see Gothel in that way at all!! I was so freaking disturbed! @fairytalepsuedonym this is all your fault for putting that dirty hippie witch bitch on my mind lol xD! /jk

Also guys, we’re getting Disney+ today. I’m so excited! Let me know if anyone has any recommendations.

And you know what I just thought of? It looked like they were implying that Merida and Lord Macintosh were gonna be a thing (possibly? I think it’s up for interpretation) but he outright shot an arrow at one of her brothers and wanted the others dead too. Merida would never! Her brothers mean too much to her to forgive such a thing. Also, she gives me gay vibes. I don’t make the rules. Alistair makes all the rules. 

Back to the rewatch.

Oh yeah! This is the 100th episode! The compilation for 100 episodes was so freaking epic!

Neal! Is that really him though?

She’s staring at his lips lol!

Omg! Emma would have come back for Neal if she could. That means she believes they were true love, and she could have split her heart with him, right?

So, he appeared to her? 

Omg! The way Emma is stroking his face and is staring at him, you’d never know she was working on saving her boyfriend lol.

You know what would have been so much better? If the underworld was perpetually dark and foggy (within reason) like the sims 4 Forgotten Hollow. That would have looked so much cooler!

Here comes the red filter. As a gifmaker and even as a viewer I wanna scream every time I see it but at least it’s not the Dark Swan arc.

I said it before and I’ll say it again: they should have let Regina’s and maybe even Rumple’s victims confront them! That would have been interesting to watch play out. I know we got Regina’s dad and Peter Pan but give me a family of Regina’s slaughtered villagers. What would their reaction be to seeing her?

Eww. I hate the way she dips her finger in that pie.

Guys. It doesn’t matter that you have Regina surrounded, she has pyrokinesis and telekinesis! Y’all are screwed! She blew the flames out? She had the advantage! I’m glad she didn’t hurt them of course, but as someone writing a book that consists of characters with magic abilities, you’ve gotta know when a powerful character has the advantage and when to use it. Where was Snow dodging a fireball as one of her arrows flies at Regina and it pauses in mid air only to sore back at Snowing and their friends, but they manage to outsmart her somehow? 

Woah. This is the boldest Henry Sr. has ever been. He’s really trying to help Regina out here. 

Cora!! My love!! I missed you!!

I love the Blind Witch. Does she have a name? I enjoyed her in ‘Regina Rising.’ I remember she’s quite a bit older than Regina

The Blind Witch: “What can I get you? Do you like gingerbread or children?” Omg Snow’s like “what the actual f**k??”

James, why are you like this?? Get off her, dude.

Those key rings are cool.

Why the hell didn’t Emma just tell Henry she saw his dad? I can think of absolutely no reason why she would keep that from him.

Lately all Robin has done is make random comments pointing out the obvious. “It’s uncanny. It’s so similar yet so off.” Yes, Robin we established that 9 minutes ago. His next line will be, “Goodness, is that a tree over there?” or “Regina, you were the Evil Queen”, mark my words. Where has his personality gone? I was never a big fan but at least he was kinda arrogant and cheeky before, at least in season 2 and 3. Now he’s just a dude that points on the ground and tells you there’s a stone. And they have the chemistry of a banana and a cheese cracker.

“Her puny army of sweaty little child beasts.”

Are those black roses? 

I may be wrong but wasn’t Cora trying to get Regina to stop hunting Snow White and find true love instead in 4x20 or am I making things up? And I wonder if this is before or after she appeared in 4x20. 

I just love Cora so much.

Is that how she got to the EF in 4x20? Through a looking glass?

The fact that she could so easily cross realms suggests that she willingly gave Regina her space. Which is something! But it feels like she’d have ulterior motives for that. Also Jefferson and Rumple would be screaming if they knew it was that easy to cross realms.

Regina: “are you threatening me?” Cora: “No. Of course not, never.” But you literally are though.

Peter Pan! He was under-utilised this season. Come on! They could have done so much with him! I’m glad at least Cora and Cruella got decent screen time.

Imagine watching OUAT for the first time with this episode and you see this full-grown man refer to a teenage boy as is father. I would be so confused lol.

I wonder if Rumple / Rumple’s father hail from Dunbroch originally. You know, with the Scottish accent. I’m kinda thinking about headcanoning that now. At least, I think Malcolm had a Scottish accent?

That got me! I forgot Cora had glamoured into Henry Sr.! I thought Cora had shapeshifted into Snow to trick Henry.

Oh, so Henry Sr. contacting her was the reason Cora could walk through the looking glass. If only someone had contacted Jefferson. And I’ve just remembered that in 4x20, she said a white rabbit brought her to the EF.

Killian looks creepy as hell here!

Lol Cora, you let Henry wrap the heart? What did you expect to happen!

Why did Regina need Snow’s heart to kill her? She could have easily killed her without even touching her. 

What the hell does Snow think is in there? She looks terrified.

Archie, wtf were you doing between Snow’s titties?! And what were you doing with a match? Gonna set some titties on fire xD? I bet she could never look at him the same again. 

He doesn’t want Regina to kill Snow because he thinks it will make her dark forever? What about all the other people she’s killed?! That makes no sense!

Okay, given that Grace didn’t seem to physically age much between the flashbacks in 1x17 and the present day in 1x17, this probably happened after the flashback’s events in 4x20. 

According to wiki, Regina’s birthday is February 1st. I’m only learning this now.

I’ve never seen Henry Sr. so bold and Adam end to help Regina.

Okay, so Regina shrunk Henry with her magic but she needed a mushroom to return him to his normal size?

Don’t lock him in that box omg!!

Cora: “when are you gonna get it in that thick head...” she’s so casually abusive.

Random thought but why is Henry’s surname Mills? It just seems like it’d be Cora’s surname. Maybe he took hers on but that seems strange for a Prince to do.

Cora, don’t!

Henry’s alright!

Aww. Henry got to meet his 3rd Grandpa! He’s so happy she named him after him. 

I’m tearing up.

“Remember who you are, Regina.”

Henry, honey, you need to go home.

Is that Persephone?

Oh my God! I’m so excited for the Cora and Zelena stuff!! By far my favourite thing of the season! To hear Cora say Zelena’s name- the fact she knows her name- I’d waited for so long for this! It left open so many questions!

And Hades infuriated with Cora on the love of his life Zelena’s behalf!! He loved her so much and would do anything for her. I don’t ship it as much as I initially did because of how it ended but that man freaking loved and cherished Zelena. He wanted everything for her. She desperately needed that and it was an emotional experience to see her get it.

That’s like her worst nightmare, being a peasant again. 

I can’t with the flame hair.

I forgot this episode was pretty good. I didn’t remember liking it but Cora saved it for me. I forgot she was in it because I have probably watch season 5 the least as I try to avoid it lol. 

#ouat #once upon a time #regina mills #the evil queen #cora mills #ouat rewatch #ouat rewatch 2019

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theyoungkleinwriter · 4 years

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Mini Myths #1: The Epic of Gilgamesh

Well for the first of my mini myths I think it’s only appropriate to start with what is considered the oldest written story in the entire history of the world. Now the way I’m going to structure these little mythological segments is by first looking at the context of the myth and then go into the actual myth itself before finishing off with a short piece about how they myth has been used and perceived in the modern day.

Context

The Epic of Gilgamesh is considered the old text of literature and is consider the second oldest religious text dating all the way back from the time of ancient Mesopotamia and is dated roughly around 2000 BCE. The epic itself was written on stone tablets with five Sumerian (The people Gilgamesh ruled over) poems being discovered. The Old Babylonian tablets dated around 1,800 BCE are the oldest surviving tablets for a single Epic of Gilgamesh narrative. Other tablet fragments have been dated closer to 200 BCE and 100 BCE suggesting that the epic is a widespread story in Sumerian culture. The most recent version of the story referred to as the Akkadian version and also called the Standard Babylonian version, consists of twelve tablets and was edited by Sîn-lēqi-unninni, who is thought to have lived sometime between 1300 BCE and 1000 BCE. Essentially the story is made up of several tablets that we have collected from different centuries to generally try to piece together a singular narrative. It bears noting the the I will be using the standard Babylonian version which is known for the Twelfth tablet being different from the others and thought to have been written at a later date.

The Epic of Gilgamesh

In a time of the old world when gods still walked the earth there stood a great and noble kingdom in ancient Mesopotamia. This was a rich and fertile land between the twin rivers of the Tigris and the Euphrates that provided its people with plenty and bountiful harvests. This rich land was populated by the great kingdom of Uruk, a kingdom ruled over by a man named Gilgamesh. Now Gilgamesh was not just any ordinary man, he was born two thirds a god and one third a mortal man. However this combination of divine birth and mortal fallacy helped to craft Gilgamesh into a cruel tyrant of a king who abused both his menfolk and the women, using them as he pleased with no regard for their lives.

In desperation the people of Uruk called out to the gods for help. And the god hear their pleas. From clay they craft a perfect equal to Gilgamesh, a divine being known as Enkidu. As he arrives in the mortal world he first meets a trapper who asks the gods to stop Enkidu from destroying his traps. The sun god Shamash send a temple prostitute to Enkidu and for nearly a fortnight the two spend time together in the warm embrace of lovers; and she teaches him all she can tell about the world on man, and of the civilisations born on earth.

The prostitute introduces him to a shepherd where he learns the craft of the trade until one day from a passing stranger he hears of the plight of the people of Uruk. Incensed by Gilgamesh’s heartless cruelty he races to the palace and faces down the king of Uruk. In that instant the pair fought with fire and fury and divine wroth as the engaged in a battle so fierce it compelled even the gods themselves to bear witness. Yet after a singular mighty blow Enkidu was brought to his knees and acknowledged the king, Gilgamesh, to be the superior of the two. And as a result the two naturally struck up an intense friendship that even the god themselves could not predict.

The pair shared in each others company and comforts as they travelled on many adventures together. They visited Gilgamesh’s mother the goddess Ninsun who adopted Enkidu as her own son. Later on they travelled to the Cedar forest where they defeat the guardian of the forest Humbaba and take his head as well as several of the strongest trees with the strongest of these to be used by Enkidu to craft into a gate for the temple of Enlil.

Upon their return the goddess Ishtar, queen of all that is fertile and ripe, falls for the king of Uruk and pursues him. However when Gilgamesh rejects her advances she used her immense powers to cause devastation throughout the lands of Uruk, lowering the level of the Euphrates and ultimately summoning Gugalanna, the divine bull of heaven to destroy Gilgamesh and Enkidu. But the king and his companion were too strong and overcame the powers of the bull, slaying it and offering up its heart to Shamash much to the displeasure of Ishtar.

And yet on this occasion the two companions had gone too far in their quest for fame and glory. In their anger at the deaths of Humbaba and Gulalanna the gods curse Enkidu was horrific dreams until, after twelves days of horrid torment Enkidu succumbs to his sickness. In one final moment he reached to the sky and cries out to his friend, who holds him in his arms as he passes into the world of the dead. Yet the king of Uruk had more faith in his friend than that and clung to Enkidu’s body, refusing to believe he was dead until a pale white maggot, dropped from his nose and into the kings lap.

Gilgamesh wailed at the death of his friend, his lament reaching the heavens themselves and bringing even the gods to tears for what they had done. He calls out for the mountains and trees, the rivers and deserts, to all beasts of the land and to all the peoples of the world to mourn for the death of his dearest friend. Gilgamesh provides ample gifts from his endless treasury to help his friend ensure a favourable reception in the world of the dead.

Then the mighty king left Uruk and wandered the wilderness in nought but animal skins, lost in both body and in spirit. Yet it was among the far and wasted lands that the king became fearful for his own mortality and sought to spare his mortal soul the pains of death, seeking out Utnapishtim (The Faraway Lands) and learn the secret of eternal life.

In his quest Gilgamesh faces set back after setback though his own malic and wrought feelings of self-importance. He rejects warning after warning and presses on relentlessly for his ultimate goal. Upon reaching Utnapishtim Gilgamesh tells him his story however the immortal man warns him that fighting the common fate of humans is futile and diminishes life's joys. Utnapishtim was a survivor of a flood that wiped out the last race of humans and as a reward for surviving the god Enlil blessed both him and his wife with eternal life. Utnapishtim points out that his immortality was a unique gift and not something most mortal men were meant to achieve however Gilgamesh reminds him that he is not mere mortal man. To test him Utnapishtim challenges Gilgamesh to stay awake for sic days and seven night but tragically Gilgamesh is still one third mortal and he quickly succumbs to sleep.

Yet Utnapishtim was no cruel or spiteful and he offered Gilgamesh one more chance, he could not grant the king immortality but he told him of a plant at the bottom of the sea he could use to restore his youth. Thanking the immortal man Gilgamesh tied stones to his feet, sucked in a mighty breath and dove to the bottom of the sea. Finally, after many travels the king reached the plant and seized it. Feeling part of his hunger for life sated he made to return to Uruk where he would use the plant to restore his youth. Yet greater than the gods was the cruel hand of fate. As he returned the king made to bathe himself in a small lake. In that moment a slithering serpent darted from the undergrowth and snatched up the plant leaving the king once more with nothing. Broken the king first weeps then is seized by uncontrollable laughter as he realises how foolish it was to chase immortality. He returns to Uruk, where the sight of its massive walls prompts him to praise this enduring work to Urshanabi the man who ferried him to Utnapishtim.

Tablet twelve features a tale after these events where Enkidu is still alive and of a journey he make to the underworld to retrieve some of Gilgamesh’s possessions. It ends with Enkidu recounting the tale of his journey through the underworld with Gilgamesh.

Learning from the past

In the modern day the Epic of Gilgamesh hasn't had as much mainstream focus like the Greek pantheon or Norse mythology. However it has found a home in some popular media with a version of this tale being explored in the anime TV series ‘Fate’. Despite a lack of popular interest in the epic of Gilgamesh in western media however in the archaeological circle it has seen a lot of research and assigned significance. Interestingly in 1998 American Assyriologist Theodore Kwasman discovered a piece believed to have contained the first lines of the epic poem in the storeroom of the British Museum which has been used to determine that Gilgamesh may have been a real Babylonian king. The epic ha been translated and used by different people for different purposes with a definitive version published in 2003 by Andrew George which is considered the most significant work on Gilgamesh in 70 years. Yet on the other hand there is the case in 2004 as Stephen Mitchell supplied a controversial version that took many liberties with the text and included modernized allusions and commentary relating to the Iraq War of 2003. Clearly the Epic of Gilgamesh may still yet be used and have relevance in the modern world, particularly in the world of the Middle-East.

What i find we can learn from the epic is it provides clear context for views on how Sumerian’s valued particular morals and the tale helps to provide insight into Sumerian society and culture. It become key to aiding our understanding of ancient peoples and what they valued, providing points of comparison to the world we live in today with its moral teachings; particularly about the fruitless pursuit of things like immortality.

#writing #myth #mythology #mini myth #gilgamesh

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lilikags · 3 years

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Puppet Queen Ch 3- Goodbye, Ras

ೃ‧₊› a b o u t t h i s p o s t° ➮ Pairing: Kayron x fem!reader ➮ Fandom: Epic Seven ➮ Series ➮ Tags: reincarnation ➮ Word Count: 1244 ➮ Previous

You turned around when you heard the door open behind you. It was the green and purple creature from the underworld. He was nothing but scum; you didn’t know what value he had- you figured he had just about none. It was quite possible he was more of a liability rather than an asset, but you figured Kayron had something in mind. After all, the man whom you had opposed for decades and lives was no easy man to defeat- no doubt he was intelligent and merciless.

“Oiiii, Kayron, I heard we were going to destroy those elves’ homes. When’s it gonna be?” you heard the large bug say. You felt yourself giving him a glare, but it seemed he didn’t notice it. That made you assume that he was quite incompetent, and you wished to never see him again. The weak should be with the civilians.

You heard Kayron give an exasperated sigh, and he sent the two of you off. Nigal went his own way, but you were guided by Tenebria. It wasn’t particularly surprising; he was probably allowed to go wherever he wanted in the majority of the place. Tenebria had brought you in a different direction. You took the opportunity to observe the place; it wasn’t a complicated place. Kayron surely knew that you’d be able to catch onto things quickly; why show you around the place? It would’ve been better for him if he blindfolded you or simply knocked you out. Could it be that he trusted Tenebria to keep you under control? You doubted it; you knew he viewed everyone else as pawns. Then- he must not view you as a threat. This triggered a hateful reaction in you; a sign that you were gaining your emotions back. You sometimes wished your emotions could just go away, but you realized that you needed some to remind you as to why you were fighting in the first place.

“Hey~ (y/n)~ how do you like it?” Tenebria asked you when you arrived at the location. You could see the smug smile on her face, the look of anticipation. You didn’t have much energy left after this; which was partly why you didn’t actively try to escape yet. You just gave her a nod and said, “It’s fine,” and went inside. You weren’t going to give this sadist the satisfaction of your rage. It’s not like you had any left for her; it all went to Kayron and the Archdemon.

You took a seat on the hard chair, which also served as a bed as the door slid closed. You closed your eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. You absolutely loathed how you were being treated, however, you learned it only resulted in going back when you made rash decisions. You learned that the hard way.

The prison cell was probably the most accurate representation of what this was to you. That reminded you; you had a team. You hadn’t seen them at all, and there was no sign of them. You figured they were killed or left there, confused. The latter was more likely- Kayron never killed for pleasure. However, there was a chance the pink haired sadist did. You couldn’t focus on that right now; you wanted to fight Kayron and kill him for good. If you killed him and the acolytes, It would just be Arbiter Vildred- he was manageable compared to the king of the dead.

When you awoke, you noticed a note on the rock of a “bed” Tenebria gave you. It read, “You are to go with Nigal to detonate the dark stones scattered throughout Dun Blyaria.” It was straightforward, and simple, with no explanation of the motives- very Karyon-like. This would likely be your chance to escape, though you felt guilty for going out like this. You told yourself that you were the key to saving Orbis and a few lives were nothing. They’d be reborn anyways.

When the time came, your body resisted going. It’s not like you decided to do as Kayron bidded- you would never. All logic pointed to going with Tenebria- out of this place, wherever it was. You’d find out when you leave. So, why were you hesitant to go? You didn't know the answer yourself.

“Come on, (y/n)” Tenebria pushed you out of the cell, somehow causing you to feel obligated to go and complete the mission Kayron had given you.

“... Yes, Lady Tenebria,” your mouth slipped. You were surprised at your own words- you would never, ever bow down to an acolyte, anyone under Kayron or Kayron himself- much less, this crazy woman. You gave her only a sigh in reaction to that, and she gave you an adoring smile in return.

When you first saw Dun Blyaria, you thought it was a beautiful place- filled with nature and stunningly lit up at night. The tree of life was something you’d like to take ahold of. You were sorry part of it was going to be destroyed today, but this would be your chance to get rid of Nigal, and anyone else who came to rescue him.

When you arrived, you had a set plan in mind. You were to proceed as Kayron planned as you went deeper in forest, then you’d quietly and quickly dispose of Nigal and anyone else they sent. Seeing as the mission would fail- there would be two responses you’d most expect: one- they respond quickly and send someone to fetch you, most likely Tenebria. You’d take this opportunity to get rid of the pesky acolyte. You believed you were free of her magic; you felt normal. If Kayron came too, you could take this as an opportunity to defeat him yourself. Possibility two- they’d be slow to respond and that’d give you time to go back to gain the support of the Order of the sword. This experience would give you more value within the Order. In any case, you were a valuable asset.

The plan went smoothly at first; Nigal was unsuspecting of your plan. However, he seemed to catch on later on as you kept eyeing him- he was sharper than you thought. It wasn’t much of a surprise though- there was always a reason Kayron chose someone. In any case, you were prepared to fight and win against him. He started throwing poison earlier than expected, and you started your attack earlier than expected. That was fine- all you needed to do was to adapt to the situation. However, Nigal had attracted the attention of the Heir of the Covenant- the person you least wanted to see at the moment.

“... (y/n)...” he was surprised when he saw you there.

“Ras…” you turned to look at him.

“Join us. Help me save Orbis once again, for the last time. The 7th world will be the last world we have to fight and save,” he invited.

“Ras, you can’t win.”

“(y/n), we can, together, save Orbis. Take my hand, and help me as you did all these years.”

“I’m sorry Ras, we’ve been through a lot together, but you’re not fit to save Orbis. I’ll do it myself.”

You saw that Ras had gained the support of the Order of the Knights; you didn’t want anything to do with them. They’ll always follow that stupid son of Diche.

“Oh, (y/n)~ In a little predicament are we~” you heard Tenebria giggle from above.

#epic seven #epic 7 #e7 #kayron #kayron x reader

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popculturebuffet · 4 years

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Hickman’s X-Men One Year In: Part 2: The Dawn of X

And we’re onto part 2. Since it took me a while to talk about Hickman’s Series outside of Giant-Size and the setup here, that’s in part one if your curious, I split this little retrospective into two parts, with this part here talking about the rest of the books. This isn’t to say they aren’t great, many of them are, it was just easier to do this as a two parter so with HIckman himself out of the way how did his hand picked batch of talented writers handle the lofty status quo he set up?Find out under the cut. Pax Krakoa baby.

Mauraders Okay just to get this out of the way this is my second faviorite x-book running, after X-Men itself and it often equals it and far and away the best tile of the run and restored my faith in Gerry Duggan. Duggan is not a bad writer and I blame the messy finish of his otherwise awesome guardians run with infnity wars on marvel trying to cram other characters into it and then a weird mash up idea that while cool, kept the guardians out of their own damn event and from confrting a now mad gamora, but that and deadpool made me forget the guy is a good writer and can do great things. Maruaders however won me back to him with intrest. A unique concept, the x-men as pirates helping ferry goods to krakoan allied states and ferry trapped mutants from hostile ones, is fucking awesome. The only thing missing is nightcrawler and it’s clear hickman has other plans, though I still feel he shoudl’ve been on the boat as he has both the relation to kitty pryde and pirate pedgree that fit in perfectly. Speaking of kitty after years of writers misusing her due to having a crush on her as a kid and shoving her into half baked romances with peter quill and her ex peter rasptuin, the latter failing so badly that marvel pulled the plug on their wedding because fans clearly didn’t want it, and battling my own reluctance ot see her front and center again, Duggan makes good use of her again: Kitty is given the unique hook of the portals not working for her and no one, even her old friend Doug after he gets back, being able to figure out WHY. Though I do hope Doug does show up here and explain it more, as him being kitty’s best friend once is rarely brought up since he got back and it’s silly it hasn’t been. But rather than take this on the chin Kitty strikes up a crew consisting of big sister Storm, first class graduate x-man, badass gay and kitty’s friend and ex iceman, bishop who reluctantly joins as her bishop more on that in a second and the best of them by a mile: Pyro. The original, finally brought back and given some intresting backstory: he was the first mutant brought back and felt good about it..t ill he realized that despite sacrificing himself to save a, if your familiar with the various cartoons this will be baffling but trust me, reformed senator kelly as Pyro himself was dying from the legacy virus, only to find out they did him first because they considered him expendable basically and naturally was upset over that, drunk a bunch of the liquor kitty smuggled in, for logan naturally, and passed out and then joined in on the rescue mission that formed the team because why not and stayed because it was a great offer. Speaking of offers with a new purpose, Kitty accepted her old enemy Emma Frost’s offer to be red queen, which includes a seat on krakoa’s council and was basically emma’s way of saying fuck you to her old cohort who she was forced to bring back on to handle the seedier side of Krakoa’s dealings via his underworld connections, sebastian shaw. Emma is the fincical backbone of krakoa, having the shipping connections to get the flowers in and out and now having kitty to handle the stuff she can’t and do some of the shipping, as well as again tell Sebastian, who naturally wants both gone and is pissy at Emma being so far ahead of him, wants gone. And while he’s seemingly succeded with kitty I not only have every expectation that while ressuection is failing to work on her she’ll be back, but that trying to murder one of the most beloved x-men whose consdiered family to among others three of krakoa’s captains, bishop after this series, four of their council, five if you include Doug whose best friends with both his left arm which is also a deadly space robot and the very place they live on. The only reason he’s not going to die 80 times in increasingily horrifying ways is because the five can’t take on that kind of workload and one murderous ass beating from half of krakoa and krakoa itself is close enough.

Emma is easily one of the books best parts, being written back as she should: An anti hero who while quick with a cutting quip, truly cares for her charges, and mutantkind as a whole and has grown from the monster she started as or even the kind of person who’d use a therapy session from a desperate man having issues opening up emotionally after apocalypse used his body as a rental car to convince him to fuck her. And yes that’s how things started with Scott and Emma and yes it’s really fucked up and yes the story treats it as such, though I still wish Scott would get actual therapy, but as Linkara recently pointed out in his House of M Review the Marvel and DC universes weirdly lack therapists for the most part and thus it was left on my mind the last two weeks.. and yes I know DC tried but when your final product at trying to serious tackle mental health is heroes in crisis.. I award you no points and god have mercy on your soul. But while Emma and Kitty get the lions share of the focus the rest of the group is enjoyable, well done and intresting, if not given many arcs to themselves, but still have enough character moments to counterballance that. The standout of the rest of the crew is easily Pyro, taken from “why is he still dead despite being super popular and used in a heavy role in X2 that’s garnered fans of that version to this day and bafflement he became a foot note in the next movie and used in every adaptation” to fun side character with a skull on his face and a love of booze and setting things on fire. He’s finally given the respect he deserves sorta and while I hope more is delved into his ressurection angst, he’s a ton of fun and it again makes me wonder why it took 20+ years to bring him back, but i’m glad the right person did it. The rest of the crew are fun with Bishop being another standout. That being said part of the reason there isn’t a lot of focus is simply because in additoin to our brave crew the book is juggling a LOT of characters.. the morlocks and calisto, both given a proper treatment after wya too long, jumbo carnation a minor character from morrisons run who was introduced in the same issue he died is emma’s designer, shinobi shaw and christian frost, the latter I question why a main relative of one of marvel’s a-list mutants who was one of marvel’s earlier gay characters hasn’t been used in a big way till now but no time like the present, Sebastian and the people he shares his big bad spot with Homines Verde aka those tweens who ran the hellfire club during jason aaron’s run because the man is nuts and who I only seemd to liked, brillinatly revamped as a racist replacemnt for the hellfire club and so far a clever threat. The book is just stuffed iwth good characters, beautiful art, and a great tone that combines spectacular humor with really good story and worldbuilding. It’s also a nice contrast to hickman’s stuff: don’t get me wrong I love hickman’s writing style but it’s nice to have something JUST as good.. but with a cheerier tone and less weariness to it, while still not lacking weight. I can’t wait to see where this goes.. it’s a pirates life for me.

Excalibur: Like most of the dawn of X-Line outside of fallen angels, more on that in a minute and even then that had an intresting new directoin for betsy braddock, I was pumped for this one. A team I loved: While I struggled to find a run I loved with Claremont’s run having Brian Braddock be a raging dick whose terrible to his girlfriend and gets away with cheating on her and Claremont not really bothering to explain Saturnyne or other characters and their history with Brian well to us yanks who never had the chance to read those tales.. though why stories by alan moore and chris claremont haven’t been republished properly or in epic collections is beyond me. Warren Ellis, who I now loathe for being a scheming weasel who treated women like garbage, had a decent run with plenty of warlock, in a weird phase where he thought he was doug, Moira and Wolfsbane stuff I loved.. but also had 30-40 something pete wisdom shacking up with 18 year old at most kitty pryde, with Pete at the time being basically Warren Ellis badass self insert character, and given recent revelations i’m pretty sure he damn well knew kitty was just 18 and even if he didn’t having his own fanfic character deflower her is just all kinds of EWWWWWW. He also had Colossus, fresh of being a villian for a while for understandable reasons, nearly beat pete into a coma in a jealous rage over the ex.. the ex he dated while she was still a minor, and left because HE , and editorial, was uncomfortable with it for damn obvious reasons. I can see why fans like to see her as bisexual and pair her with Illiayna.. I mean why the fuck not? They have better chemistry than most of he hetrosexual intrests and are paried because of that and not because the writer wanted to make out iwth kitty as a teenager and forgot “oh yeah she’s fictional and i’m 40!” Christ thank god for Gerry Duggan. But yeah moving on from that I was still pumped as a magical x-men book with Besty Braddock now captain freaking britan, and apocalypse on the roster. And rictor and jubille? nad rouge and gambit I guess.. I don’t knokw if they fit but whatever. Sign me up. The actual result is a mixed back. I do like Tini Howard’s work here to a point: Betsy gets good character stuff and theres actually good tension from the fact that the new captain britan is no longer primarily a british ctizen, and the book brought back a character I felt marvel needed to do more with: Jamie. if you don’t know, Jamie is betsy and brian’s, her brother and the former captain britian, older brother who went insane due to his powers and thus just goes around in his underwear convinced reality isn’t real and he can do what he wants and the tension with Jamie refusing to have anything to do with his brother for no good reason is really good. Rictor and Apocalypse are likewise good sensable additons: Rictor turns out to be a natural to being a druid which is a nice twist and makes sense given when he lost his powers the biggest issue with that was loosing touch with earth after having a connection to it be a vital part of him for years. Apocalypse as an ominus chess master slowly securing magic for mutantkind with some goal we’re about to get answers to is really investing and adds a layer to his character, that much like doctor doom he’s as much sorecer as he is scinetest and given the guy’s immortal, it dosen’t feel like it was pulled out of nowhere. The problem is the other half of the cast.. dosen’t really work. I fucking love Jubilee, a faviroite of mine as an xman despite not being a huge 90′s x-men cartoon fan, just feels kinda shoe horned in. Her son becomes a dragon and she worries about him constantly, but her worrying about her son possibly not being a mutant on mutant land could be done in any other x-book, and fraknly I feel her personality would fit better with the maruaders, and it’d be intresting to see kitty and her on the same team since both really haven’t interacted. Here she just feels like “well tini wanted jubilee and no one else did soooo I made her son a dragon to justify getting her”. I feel more could be done and hope Tini has better plans for her. Rouge is one of my faviorte x-men and All New X Factor and Kelly Thompsons work with him and Rouge made me like Gambit again, and I DO love their marriage and it was a way better idea than the one Guggenhiem had planned.. but while the idea of Rouge being reborn is intresting and all, she still dosen’t really get to do much and like Jubilee just feels weirldy out of place while Remy has that plus he’s annoying, as while he’s the only one rightfully supscious of apocalypse he also won’t shut the fuck up about it for five minutes. Ig et where he’s coming from but it dosen’t make him less annoying. These aren’t bad characters, but sof ar they just feel weirdly out of place in a magic based book and unlike Rictor tini hasn’t made any of htem but Rouge feel in place.

That being said I could ignore that more.. but the villians are also week. So far at least, as the return of Satyurne has given the book it’s first good antagonist.. but what I feel drags the book down the most from it’s potential is the bad guys; Morgan Le Fay is the first antaognist, being mad at apocalypse’s intrusions and corrputing Brian.. but her motives are just so boring: She wants power and to rule, she hates mutants... while “hates mutants” is a qualifier for every other antagonist so far, she just feels bland.. Tini just dosen’t make her feel like a good antagonist and it’s a shame as mutant hater or not she’s something DIFFRENT from the throngs of mutant hating conspiracies, mostly from russia in the other books... she’s just so bland it dosen’t work. And after her is Cullen Bloodstone who as far as I can tell is written out of character.. haven’t read his book but I had both a friend confirm it and having read his marvel wiki entry, it just seems like an odd turn to have him be a racist asshole. But even with all my problems and underwhelm here.. I still WANT the book to get from okay to amazing, and feel it genuinely has the potetial. I’ve seen books sharply improve after a rough first arc, Duggan himself showed me that with his Guardians run. Sometimes it just takes time for something to truly blossom and I have a feeling even with my issues, with x of swords coming up howard’s going to flip it all on it’s head and leave me standing there gasping like a moron. I have hope for that. And if nothing else the book is at least UNIQUE. And not in a trainwreck way: by giving mutants a piece of the magic pie and having them tackle far weirder threats, it’s at least doing something new and it probably lands for other people if not me, and if nothing else it does brian 80 times better than the claremont run did. not a high bar but I do like the character and it’s nice to see him take such an intresting path, and the same goes for Betsy. Tini’s still got magic to do, and I have a feeling it’s going to take me by storm very soon.

Fallen Angels: Now for the other half of the coin as it were. Some fans weren’t happy about Betsy getting her old body back, and yes Psylocke wasn’t orignally asian but a white british woman bodyswapped iwth a japanese assasian and yes that’s as ludicrious and unteitonally offensive as it sounds, because horrible implications of said Body Swap or not, Psylocke was one of the few asian superheros of note. So to compromise , Hickman and co decided to split the diffrence: Betsy would come back and get a rank up to captain britan, while Kwannon, said assasian, would take over as Psylocke. Hence Excalibur above and fallen angels here and I was excited about it. The Body Swap thing went on a decade too long and this way fans got the character they knew as Psylocke in another book while the face they recognized would finally get some fleshing out. I was excited about that and while probably the least excited about this book of the intitial 5, it did have an intresting lead, two characters I did like (Kid Cable I grant was only under hickman who turned him from that brat version of cable who killed the one I really love to a good character in his own right), and an intresting antagonist in a sentient machine. In practice it was okay. The best I can say is that writer Brian Hill DOES do a great job taking a mostly minor x-character and really fleshing her out and making her engaging and Kwannon’s quest to save her daughter is really compelling.. but the premise of those who don’t fit with krakoa dosen’t work with the roster given. Laura Kinney is not only sticking with the x-23 name after dropping the wolverine mantle for no reason previously, something Hickman fixed as soon as he realized how fans felt for her apperance in the main book, while Cable feels nothing like the far more fun version from Hickman’s X-Men and later Duggan’s Cable. Add in Husk and Bling who do deserve to be on a team but feel out of place here, and it just.. is okay. The book has an intresting angagonist and a great lead, but just dosen’t work as a team book and would’ve been better off being JUST about kwannon herself, who is far and away the best part about the book and i’m glad she got fleshed out. Not TERRIBLE but nothing special and it’s a shame given the antagonist, whose name I can’t even remember at this point, is intresting and ties into mutantkind’s greatest enmies being man and machine accoridng to house and powers.. basically a decent concep twith a flawed execution. Maybe hill’ sbatman and hte outisders run is better. I need to get on that. That being said the premise and idea is so far being done well in Hellions which we’ll get to, even if I’m being cautious really getting into the book with Zeb Wells track record. But more on that in a bit.

X-Force: Time to make noise, bad guys leave us no choice.. you know the rest. But yeah X-force. The concept here grabbed me, having X-Force rather than just be the black ops squad but be literal black ops for krakoa, was really great and fit the brave new world.. what worried me was the writer, Benjamin Percy. Now a lot of x-fans probably knew him from the much beloved “Wolverine: The Long Night” podcast, which i’ve heard is utterly fantastic as is it’s followup.. but I hadn’t heard it, and had only heard of Percy from DC comics where under his belt was an okay teen titans run and a not very good and politcally unsubtle green arrow book. And i’m not against politics in comics it just wasn’t done at all well there and the “oliver queen looses hif ourture due to a shadowy conspiracy thing” was already done better by jeff lemire. So yeah I was going to give this a chance but figured like those books it’d start strong and then peter out. I. Was. Wronnnnggg. X-Force is easily one of the best of the dawn of x and uses said premise well. It started a bit roughly, mostly becasue the first arc idnd’t make clear x-force didn’t exist yet but was a great origin story: a squad of military commandos working for a shadowy consirtum who become x-force’s big bad, plunge onto Krakoa and massacre a bunch of mutantas and assinate charles xavier. He comes back, though it’s trickier for obvious reasons, but it’s clear from this, and from wolverine and kid omega’s sucessful investigation and finding domino, that this can’t go on and thus X-Forces is formed; The intellegence and black ops arm of Krakoa and the one arm of it’s goverment exempt from the ‘dont’ kill humans rule”. What followed was nearly a years worth of fast paced adventures with good character stuff: Wolverine is in his element, kid omega, while I had my doubts due to quinten being way overused , turned out to be a perfect choice basically being a more compitent teenage sterling archer, cocky and loving this but also really good at his job, while Domino gets a great arc dealing with her trauma over her mutalation and having some of her power stolen by the shadowy masked dickheads while Colossus deals with his trauma over what went down when he rescued some Russian mutants, with the book slowly building up new threats and towards a showdown with Russia, something that’s also been built up by conflicts in Wolverine and Mauraders, which again makes the world of x feel more like an actual world instead a bunch of comics in one cast herd. Jean Grey is good for intellegence, though by now seems to have noped out as she couldn’t take the toll, it’s not for everyone and most notably after 5 or 6 years of being treated worse and worse and written worse and worse and becoming a bigger and bigger piece of shit Beast is FINALLY put in the right spot: his darker turns aren’t ignored but he’s back to being an actually intellegent hero as X-force’s director, still a bit greasy but now for good reason and without a god complex or some such bullshit and with a tiny bit of his humor back. Not much else to say really, X-Force is well paced, enjoyable and gritty, getting the spirit of the team at it’s best down right while doing something fresh with it.

New Mutants (Ed Brisson) Last one, New Mutants is the odd duck of the dawn of x line in terms of how it was launched. Fallen Angels ended up being a mini series both due to Hill being busy and it’s cast being needed elsewhere but will presmibly get a follow up later, but it’s not the ONLY mini series in the line with Fantastic four/x-men, the giant sized one shots and now Empyre: X-Men all debuting in wave 2. New Mutants however is the first book to change writers and said writer STARTED in the middle of hickman’s run, partly due to scheduling delays but even before that it was partly by design and those issues haven’t been collected yet, with hickman’s short run being collected first. So you have a run that builds off what Hickman started but with it’s own ideas that started insidei t and suprisingly it .. really works. While I do think there are better books in the line Brisson’s new mutants is enjoyable, combining humor and character work. New Mutants focuses on the sextant, which was first brought up in hickman’s run, the series of habitats for younger mutants on krakoa that the new mutants look out for, and while the original new mutants are in space, Armor decides to try and bring some old friends in to join in paradise with the help of Glob Herman, that big pink guy with a visable skeleton and eyes, and Maxine and Manon, who in the tradition of layla miller were created for an event and not great htere but turned out amazing under the right writer.. who I think also wrote that event but whatever, a pair of empaths and telepaths who have trouble grasping the right ethics for using their powers. The four go to get one of my faviorite x-men back: BEAK! I missed him even if he’s weirdly suddenly repowered. Beak and his wife Angel only haven’t joiend in with their kids because his dad’s sick, and things soon escalate when a bunch of criminals try holding them all hostage and it’s up to boom boom, bored since everyone left her alone, to save the day! After that we deal with Magik rangling them and the team’s new mission statment: not wanting ot mess up again like she did with beak, who did join them but not without loosing his dad and then his memory of his dad thanks to the twins misguided efforts, Armor still wants to try welcoming new mutants in with the vetrans help, and thus we have our puprose: focusing both on how these younger mutant 20 somethigns of various ages from early to late work together to make a better world nad help their own get back to this world. it’s intresting.. I’m not in love with it like mauraders or x-force, but it’s still pretty good and their first big foe so far, DoX, a blog that well.. doxes mutants that haven’t arrived yet, seems to be intresting. Not much to say just pretty good and and better at mixing comedy and character stuff, and getting the cast right. Ed Brisson had already proven himself on old man logan, but this cements him as one of the hottest new x-writers around and i’m glad he was given a book here. He’s also succeded in making me actually like Glob Herman so that’s a plus.

Fantastic Four/X-Men The first title of wave 2 and easily one of the best, right up there with mauraders nad probably JUSST behind it and ONLY because i’ts a mini series, giving the X-Men their first real step into the rest of hte marvel universe. Sure the 4 had cameoed in the first issue and there’s been mentions of krakoa in other books and one off issues but mostly Krakoa really hadn’t impacted anything.. but that first issue also set things up with Scott’s conversation with Sue Richards

Yeah and in case those who haven’t been aware of what’s going on with the FF lately and either remember franklin as a 6-11 year old or wondered why the hell he was suddenly a teen when they read this crossover, it’s actually simple; At the end of secret wars the Richards family was put on a bus, also so marvel could shove the ff as a proper team out the door due to the whole fox rights thing, and when Dan Slott had brought them back.. and cleverly had more time pass for the richards than for the 616 proper, so he could age Franklin up to his late teens and Valeria up to her early ones, allowing the richards children to actually age since Franklin’s age always had to stay vauge due to marvel’s vage and wobbly time scale. This way they get both consitant ages and more agency. But the return also came with a price as Franklin, who if you didn’t know is so powerful he can create whole universe and shape the sturcture of the universe, had his powers break saving his family, and thus since he came back, he’s onlyg got so much of them left in the tank before they run out entirely, and it’s been an issue for him in Slott’s run as he worries about being the normal human in a fantastic family and comes to a head here, though rather than Hickman himself, who as mentioned last time has a marvelous track record with the family or FF series writer dan slott Hickman choose a wild card for this, though had both Hickman and Slott’s permission to do whatever he wanted: Chip Zdarsky, a modern marvel for marvel who’d writtne the four in marvel two in one but for some reason didn’t get the main book and this book makes me hope whenever Dan Slott bows out he gets his turn and while this is his first x-men work, Zdarsky proves he’s just as good here as is in most of his work on Howard the Duck, Jughead and Star Lord.. a weird selection I know but all classics.

With this power outage, Franklin is worried his dad is, at least subconciously, not really trying to help him and to make matters worse teh x-men show up to offer their help.. and Franklin his birthright. The arguments made by both sides are great and I will be covering the series in full soon but in a nutshell the four dont’ want to give up their son/nephew, Reed dosen’t trust Xavier and feels he wants to use his son’s powers while the x-men feel it’s franlin’s choice and he’s old enough to make it, he belongs with them and he’ll be safer there. It also works because Franklin understandably isn’t swayed by either as neither is reallyt alking to him more at him, especially his parents .. and only tries the gate when Kitty Pryde, the two bonded back in the 80s and a young franklin stopped her from comitting suicide long story but really moving, is the only one to tell him it’s his choice. This dosen’t go quite well though since Reed Richards, father of the year, decided to make a device to mask his son’s mutant gene and no one, including his own family, is happy about htis. Naturally Franklin, with Val’s help, runs away.. and then as if it couldn’t get worse DOOM shows up wanting to help so now it’s a three way dance between them for hte fate of franklin. The series has gorgeous art form the dodsons a really damn compelling story and great setup for further stories for both lines and feels like the best of both franchises. It’s the x-men’s first huge impact on the rest of the marvel universe,a nd it feels like it with the ending showing that and showing this might not be the last time both sides crossover. It’s everything you could want from a crossover and i’m only being so brief because I want to review it soon as a huge fan of both groups. Easily one of the best x-men stories of the line and one of the best stories for both groups period.

Wolverine: We’re onto the final two, and Percy’s second book and the first solo.. and it’s logan again! Makes sense though: Wolverine only just came back from the dead, and while both is daughter and alternate future self carried the woverline banner for him, the original hasn’t gotten his own ongoing in some time. And so far.. it’s pretty good> the first issues a bit messy due to it’s lenght, but overall the book is intresting and has Logan graple with being the best at waht he does and if he can be better or if he deserves paradise while also delivering a compelling solo mission teaming Wolverine up with a federal agent who resents mutants. it also does some good world building, explaning why Krakoan drugs have things like wait lists (they want to control production closely both to avoid having the flower taken away and for quality control), and expanding the russia subplot while using Dracula of all people as a major antagonist, which is clever especailly since this isn’t his first rodeo with the x-men. Just a fun book wiht loads of promise.

Hellions: NOt much to say here as it’s hard to judge after two issues, buti f nothing else this series brought back the delightfully batshit Nanny, who just with last weeks issue offered to nurse Greycrow (who had his name changed from scalphunter because of course marvel did why wouldn’t they) and falling down. It combines humor with an odd but well thought out cast and makes Alex Summers intresting without making everyone else assholes, a hard but earned feet. If it continues to be good.. I dunno, especially since i haven’t been impressed by any of zeb wells other works especially his new mutants run, good god that one’s am ess, but so far he’s winning me over with a clever concept and roster full of deep cuts. Final Thoughts: I won’t be covering Empyre: X_men, though I did enjoy it and i’l save that one for next time. For now this has been a hell of a year of x-men comics, with even the weaker books still having something intresting and none being outright terribule and only one had a bad grasp on some of it’s cast and for a line this big and expansive, that’s a gold medal achivment. After YEARS of stasis the x-men have finally risen again better, bolder and stranger than ever. IS every book A+ gold star etc etc, no, but what’s important.. is that it’s all DECENT. There’s enough standout books to make it work but as i’ve made clear what isn’t the best of the best is still good or decent. There’s nothing bad, no one phoning it in or not giving an effort, everyone is trying thier hardest and succeding on SOME level even if not completely and that.. that’s truly amazing and I look forward to more of it as this line continues. Pax Krakoa and hopefully i’ll see you again.

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way-down-meme-town · 4 years

Text

Hadestown Act I Sentence Meme

Under the cut you will find 212 lyrics from the first act of the musical Hadestown to use for your enjoyment!

Road To Hell 1. “Once upon a time there was a railroad line.”

2. “Don’t ask where, brother, don’t ask when.”

3. “It was the road to Hell. It was hard times.”

4. “It was a world of gods and men.”

5. “It’s an old song. It’s an old tale from way back when.”

6. “It’s an old song and we’re gonna sing it again.”

7. “We got some gods in the house tonight!”

8. “See, on the road to Hell there was a railroad line.”

9. “They was always singin’ in the back of your mind.”

10. “Everybody, meet the Fates.”

11. “If you ride that train to the end of the line where the sun don’t shine and it’s always shady, it’s there you’ll find the king of the mine.”

12. “Someone’s got to tell the tale whether or not it turns out well.”

13. “Not everyone gets to be a god.”

14. “Don’t forget that times are hard.”

15. “This boy was a muse’s son.”

16. “You might say the boy was touched, ‘cause he was touched by the gods themselves.”

17. “There was one more soul on this road.”

18. “Girl, come on in from the cold.”

19. “Thus begins the tale of Orpheus and Eurdyice.”

20. “It’s a tale of love from long ago.”

Any Way The Wind Blows 21. “She was no stranger to the world, no stranger to the wind.”

22. “The weather ain’t the way it was before. Ain’t no spring or fall anymore.”

23. “There ain’t a thing that you can do when the weather takes a turn on you, ‘cept for hurry up and hit the road.”

24. “People turn on you just like the wind.”

25. “Everybody is a fair weather friend. In the end, you’re better off alone.”

26. “When you’re hungry and there ain’t enough to go around, ain’t no length to which a girl won’t go.”

27. “Sometimes you think you would do anything to fill your belly full of food.”

28. “You know how those muses are, sometimes they abandon you.”

29. “This poor boy, he wore his heart out on his sleeve.”

30. “You might say he was naive to the ways of the world.”

31. “I liked to hear him sing and his way of seeing things, so I took him underneath my wing.”

Come Home With Me 32. “You wanna talk to her?”

33. “Don’t come on too strong.”

34. “Come home with me.”

35. “Is he always like this?”

36. “Your name is like a melody.”

37. “A singer? Is that what you are?”

38. “Oh, a liar and a player too? I’ve met too many men like you.”

39. “He’s not like any man you’ve met.”

40. “I’m working on a song, a song. It isn’t finished yet, but when it’s done and when I sing it, spring will come again.”

41. “Spring will come.”

42. “I haven’t seen a spring or fall since…I can’t recall.”

43. “That’s what I’m working on, a song to fix what’s wrong. Take what’s broken, make it whole.”

44. “Oh, he’s crazy. Why would I become his wife?”

45. “He’ll make you feel alive.”

Wedding Song 46. “Lover, tell me if you can, who’s gonna buy the wedding bands?”

47. “Times being what they are, hard and getting harder all the time.”

48. “Lover, when I sing my song, all the rivers’ll sing along.”

49. “The rivers gonna give us the wedding bands.”

50. “Lover, tell me if you can, who’s gonna lay the wedding table?”

51. “Times being what they are, dark and getting darker all the time.”

52. “Lover, when I sing my song all the trees gonna sing along.”

53. “The trees gonna lay the wedding table.”

54. “So when you sing your song, the one you’re working on, spring will come again?”

55. “You wanna take me home? Sing the song.”

56. “Lover, tell me when we’re wed, who’s gonna make the wedding bed?”

57. “Lover, when I sing my song, all the birds gonna sing along.”

Epic I 58. “Where’d you get that melody?”

59. “It came to me as if I’d known it all along.”

60. “It’s an old song, a song of love from long ago. Long time since I heard it though.”

61. “You’ve heard that melody before?”

62. “Remember the tale I told you once about the gods?”

63. “Remember how it used to be? Their love made the world go round.”

64. “Hades was king of the underworld, but he fell in love with a beautiful lady who walked up above in her mothers green field.”

65. “He took her home to become his queen where the sun never shone on anyone.”

66. “The Gods sang his song of love and the world sang it with them.”

67. “That was long ago, before we were on this road.”

Livin It Up On Top 68. “On the road to hell there was a lot of waiting.”

69. “These days she never stays for long, but good things come to those who wait.”

70. “Well it’s like he said, I’m an outdoor girl.”

71. “She forgot a little thing called spring.”

72. “Are you wondering where I’ve been?”

73. “Been to hell and back again.”

74. “Like my mama always said: when you’re down, you’re down and when you’re up, you’re up.”

75. “If you ain’t six feet underground, you’re living it up on top.”

76. “Let’s not talk about hard times. Pour the wine, it’s summertime!”

77. “Who makes the summer sun shine bright?”

78. “Who makes the fruit of the vine get ripe?”

79. “Who makes the flowers bloom again, in spite of a man?”

80. “Let me tell you something that my mama said to me: you take what you can get and you make the most of it.”

81. “It was summertime on the road to hell.”

82. “You might say it was in spite of herself.”

83. “For a moment there, the world came back to life.”

84. “Let the poet bless this round.”

85. “To the patroness of all of this, Persephone, who has finally returned to us with wine enough to share.”

86. “If no one takes too much, there will always be enough.”

87. “She will always fill our cups and we will always raise them up to the world we dream about, and the one we live in now.”

88. “Livin’ it up and we ain’t gonna stop.”

All I’ve Ever Known (Intro) 89. “He had a gift to give. He could make you see how the world could be in spite of the way that it is.”

90. “She’d seen how the world was. When she fell, she fell in spite of herself.”

All I’ve Ever Known 91. “I was alone so long I didn’t even know that I was lonely.”

92. “Out in the cold so long I didn’t even know that I was cold.”

93. “All I’ve ever known is how to hold my own.”

94. “All I’ve ever known is how to hold my own, but now I wanna hold you too.”

95. “You take me in your arms and suddenly there’s sunlight all around me.”

96. “I don’t wanna go back to the lonely life.”

97. “I don’t know how or why or who I am that I should get to hold you.”

98. “When I saw you all alone against the sky, it’s like I’d known you all along.”

99. “I know you before we met and I don’t even know you yet, all I know is you’re someone I have always known.”

100. “Now I wanna hold you close. I don’t wanna ever have to let you go.”

101. “Say that you’ll hold me forever. Say that the wind won’t change on us.”

102. “Say that we’ll stay with each other and it will always be like this.”

103. “The wind will never change on us as long as we stay with each other.”

Way Down Hadestown 104. “That was not six months!”

105. “Better go and get your suitcase packed. Guess it’s time to go.”

106. “She’s gonna ride that train til the end of the line.”

107. “Did you ever wonder what it’s like on the underside?”

108. “You either get to hell or to Hadestown, ain’t no difference anymore.”

109. “Everybody tryin’ to get a ticket to go, but those who go they don’t come back.”

110. “Down there it’s a bunch of stiffs. Brother, I’ll be board to death.”

111. “Takes a lot of medicine to make it through the winter time.”

112. “All them shiny little heads and tails, where do you think they come from?”

113. “Everybody shines by the sweat of his brow.”

114. “The wage is nothing and the work is hard.”

115. “It’s a graveyard in Hadestown.”

116. “Mr. Hades is a mean old boss!”

117. “An eye for an eye! A lie for a lie!”

118. “You better forget about your wishing well.”

119. “I missed ya.”

120. “Mr. Hades is a mighty king.”

121. “Must be making some might big deals. Seems like he owns everything.”

122. “Kind of makes you wonder how it feels.”

A Gathering Storm 123. “He came too soon. He came for her too soon. It’s not supposed to be like this.”

124. “Well, til someone brings the world back into tune this is how it is.”

125. “Touched by the gods is what he is.”

126. “Finish it quick. The wind is changing. There’s a storm coming on.”

Epic II 127. “Hades is king of oil and coal and the riches that flow where the rivers are found.”

128. “His loneliness moves in him crude and black.”

129. “He thinks of his wife in the arms of the sun.”

130. “Jealousy fuels him and finds him and fills him.”

Chant 131. “Low. Keep your head low.”

132. “You gotta keep your heard low if you wanna keep your head.”

133. “In the coldest time of year, why is it so hot down here?”

134. “Lover, you were gone so long. Lover, I was lonesome.”

135. “When you feel that fire, think of it as my desire.”

136. “I am keeping one eye on the sky and tryin’ to trust that the song he’s working on is gonna shelter us from the wind.”

137. “In the darkest time of year, why is it so bright down here?”

138. “When you see that glare, think of it as my despair.”

139. “His black gold flows in the world down below and her dark clouds roll in the one above.”

140. “That’s why times are so hard. It’s because of the gods.”

141. “The gods have forgotten the song of their love.”

142. “I’m trying to believe that the song he’s working on is gonna harbor me from the wind.”

143. “Did you think I’d be impressed with this neon necropolis?”

144. “Everything I do, I do it for the love of you.”

145. “If you don’t even want my love, I’ll give it so someone who does. Someone grateful for her fate, someone who appreciates the comforts of a gilded cage.”

146. “Think of them as my embrace of you.”

Hey Little Songbird 147. “Hey little songbird, give me a song.”

148. “I’m a busy man and I can’t stay long. I got clients to call. I got orders to fill.”

149. “I got walls to build. I got riots to quell.”

150. “They’re giving me hell back in Hades.”

151. “Hey, little songbird, cat got your tongue?”

152. “Always a pity for one so pretty and young when poverty comes to clip your wings and knock the wind right out of your lungs.”

153. “Nobody sings on empty.”

154. “Strange is the call of this strange man.”

155. “You’d shine like a diamond dark in the mine.”

156. “The choice is yours if you’re willing to choose, seeing as you’ve got nothing to lose.”

157. “Wasn’t it gonna be the two of us? Weren’t we birds of a feather?”

158. “Let me guess. He’s some kind of poet and he’s penniless.”

159. “Give him your hand, he’ll give you his hand-to-mouth.”

160. “He’ll write you a poem when the power is out.”

161. “See how the vipers and vultures surround you. They’ll take you down, they’ll pick you clean.”

162. “People get mean when the chips are down.”

When The Chips Are Down 163. “Life ain’t easy. Life ain’t fair. A girls gotta fight for he rightful share.”

164. “What you gonna do when the chips are down?”

165. “Help yourself, to hell with the rest. Even the one who loves you best.”

166. “Take it if you can, give if you must. Ain’t nobody but yourself to trust.”

167. “Aim for the heart, shoot to kill. If you don’t do it then the other one will.”

168. “The first shall be first and the last shall be last.”

169. “Cast your eyes to heaven, you get a knife in the back.”

170. “Nobody’s innocent now that the chips are down.”

Gone, I’m Gone 171. “My heart is yours, always was and will be. It’s my gut I can’t ignore.”

172. “My heart it aches to stay, but the flesh will have its way.”

173. “The way is dark and long. I’m already gone.”

174. “Go ahead and lay the blame. Talk of virtue, talk of sin.”

175. “Wouldn’t you have done the same in her shoes, in her skin?”

176. “You can have your principles when you’ve got a belly full, but hunger has a way with you.”

177. “There’s no telling what you’re gonna do when the chips are down.”

Wait For Me (Intro) 178. “Hey, the big artiste! Ain’t you working on your masterpiece?”

179. “What do you care? You’ll find another muse somewhere.”

180. “Wherever she is is where I’ll go.”

181. “What if I said she’s down below?”

182. “She called your name before she went, but I guess you weren’t listening.”

183. “Just how far would you go for her?”

184. “Course there is another way, but nah, I ain’t supposed to say.”

185. “It ain’t for the sensitive of soul. So do you really wanna go?”

186. “With all your heart? Well, that’s a start.”

Wait For Me 187. “You have to take the long way down, through the underground under cover of night.”

188. “Ain’t no compass, ain’t no map. Just a telephone wire and a railroad track.”

189. “Wait for me, I’m comin’.”

190. “If all you got is your own two legs, just be glad you got ‘em.”

191. “Who are you to think that you can walk a road that no one ever walked before?”

192. “You’re on the lam, you’re on the run. Don’t give your name, you don’t have one.”

193. “Don’t look no one in the eye.”

194. “That town’ll try to suck you dry.”

195. “They’ll pluck the heart right out your chest.”

196. “I hear the walls repeating the falling of my feet and it sounds like drumming.”

197. “I hear the rocks and stone echoing my song.”

Why We Build The Wall 198. “Why do we build the wall my children, my children?”

199. “We build the wall to keep us free.”

200. “That’s why we build the wall, we build the wall to keep us free.”

201. “How does the wall keep us free my children, my children?”

202. “How does the wall keep us free?”

203. “How does the wall keep us free? The wall keeps out the enemy.”

204. “Who do we call the enemy my children, my children?”

205. “Who do we call the enemy?”

206. “Who do we call the enemy? The enemy is poverty and the wall keeps out the enemy.”

207. “We have and they have not my children, my children. They want what we have got.”

208. “What do we have that they should want my children, my children?”

209. “What do we have that they should want? We have a wall to work upon.”

210. “Our work is never done my children, my children.”

Why We Build The Wall (Outro) 211. “There are papers to be signed. Step into my office.”

212. “A lot can happen behind closed doors. That’s for sure, that’s a fact.”

#ask meme #rp meme #sentence meme #musical meme #hadestown #hadestown act 1

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