#but also im so rusty i feel like something looks wrong but idk what it is 🤬 WHATEVER

[ducktollers]

gay zukka dogs (designs by @dickpuncher420 )

#my art #zukka #id in alt #LOL IDK feeling silly #yheyre so cute and im in my dog drawinf era #but also im so rusty i feel like something looks wrong but idk what it is 🤬 WHATEVER #better furries coming to u soon. hopefully #now that school is done my only responsibility is Draw All Day Every Day

[kkyeomies]

Im so excited to hear that you’re going to be writing again! I love seventeen, and idk if requests are open but I’d love to ask for a tiny seungkwan Drabble. maybe first time with seungkwan? where it’s cute at first but gets really steamy 😭 sorry if this is a weird request, feel free to ignore it ^^

hi anon, thank you for being my first request!!!!! i know you said drabble, but i... got very carried away. i hope i interpreted it the way u wanted :) my writing is still a bit rusty, so i also hope this is a tolerable read 🙏🏽

First Time

pairing - bf!seungkwan x reader

content- fluff, smut, new relationship, first time, reader is a virgin

warnings: none

word count- 2.1k

He was stumped. He had tried what seemed like every trick in the book, but he still couldn’t figure out why you didn’t want to have sex with him. You’d been dating for almost four months, and Seungkwan couldn’t help but feel like he was doing something wrong. He had never forced you to do anything you didn’t want to, of course, but by now, he simply couldn’t figure out why you shied away when he tried to go further. Despite this, you were still very affectionate toward him and expressed only love. Tonight, however, Seungkwan decided he would put an end to his agony, whichever way it would end.

”Baby, can I ask you something?”

You look down at his face from where he lays on your lap, both of you currently in his bed relaxing and listening to music. His soft black locks weaved through your fingers as you brushed them back in a soothing motion. You always thought he looked the most beautiful like this, face free of worries or cares, just enjoying the time between the two of you. 

As you held eye contact with him, you could see a hint of hesitation in his deep brown eyes. Offering him a warm smile, you reply.

”Have I ever said no to that question?”

Seungkwan moved up from your lap to sit, leaning on the headboard next to you, taking your hand in his and squeezing it slightly.

”Am I doing something wrong? Like, to make you uncomfortable? Or is it something I said? I promise I can fix it- just let me know, and I’ll d-“

”Whoa, sweetie, where is this coming from?”

You sit up a little straighter, trying to understand where this is heading. You could feel him playing with your fingernails, something he often did when he was anxious about something. 

He hesitates again before saying, “It’s just that, well, we’ve been together for a while now, and every time I try to… go further… you don’t seem to like it, so I don’t know if … ” His voice fizzles out to a whisper at the end of his insinuation, anticipating the worst possible answer from you. Instead, he was surprised to see your face heat up in embarrassment as the weight of his words sunk in.

In just a moment, your positions switched. His dependant grip on your hand turns reassuring, and he scoots a little closer to drape his other arm over your shoulder to draw you into him.

”Hey, it’s okay. We don’t have to talk about it if it makes you uncomfortable. Forget I even mentioned it.” He copies your warm smile from earlier as he lifts your chin to meet his eyes. As much as he wanted an answer to his troubles, it wasn’t worth any pain on your part.

You look down at your intertwined fingers before speaking, “It’s just- I’ve never had sex before.”

Frankly, he was shocked. He had never even considered that an option. He knew you had dated before and just assumed you had experience (in his eyes, you were too attractive to be a virgin still), but now he felt like an idiot.

”I’m so sorry, baby, I just thought- I shouldn’t have assumed. We can wait until whenever you want to.” He pressed a small kiss to your head as he pulled you closer into his arms.

“Well, it’s not that I don’t want to. I’m just afraid.”

“Afraid of what?”

“Messing up, I guess. What if you don’t like it, or I can’t make you feel good?”

He sat up to face you better before saying, “I don’t think you’ve ever made me not feel good.” 

You scoffed lightheartedly, amused by his flattery, but he looked dead serious.

“I’m not kidding. I promise you nothing you could do would ever make me feel bad, and you know I’d take good care of you, too. Plus, it doesn’t have to be perfect. It's a ‘first time’ for a reason, silly.” His reassuring tone put you at ease. You had no doubt he would take care of you; he’s proved that to be true every day you’ve been together. 

You had been replaying that conversation since it occurred over two weeks ago. The more you thought Seungkwan’s words, the more your fear dissipated, leaving an unfamiliar sense of excitement in your belly. 

You and Seungkwan were settled on the couch for your first movie night in a while. It was his first day off of schedules, and he wanted to spend it cuddled up with you.

“What’s wrong, honey? Did I choose the wrong flavor of ice cream?”

“I’m ready.”

“Huh?”

You took a deep breath before declaring, “I want you to take good care of me, Kwannie.”

His confused face shifted as it clicked in his head, and in less than a minute, he had swept you away to the bedroom. In one fluid move, he laid you down on the bed and settled himself in between your hips. He was wasting no time as he pulled his hoodie off, littering kisses down your neck and chest. As he pulled back for a breath, you could catch a good look at his face, shining with a newfound energy.

“You know how long I’ve waited for this moment, baby? All I want to do is make you feel good. Will you let me do that, hmm?” 

You could only offer him a whimper, both taken aback and extremely turned on by this new side of him you were seeing. He dove back in to capture your lips while stripping the both of you down. Soon, you were situated between the soft sheets underneath you and the cage of Seungkwan’s arms. The temperature was becoming borderline unbearable as your skin heated up with passion and anticipation. 

He shifted down your body slowly, leaving a trail of open-mouthed kisses all over your stomach and thighs. His hands roamed over your breasts gently, causing your nipples to perk up and a cool shiver to wash over you. When he reached the foot of the bed, he dropped to his knees on the floor and moved your legs onto his shoulders, spreading you open in all your glory. Seungkwan couldn't hold back his low groan after seeing you already wet and ready for him to dive in. You gasped as his tongue finally met your folds; he was really wasting no time. To be honest, you had never expected him to be this forward. He always treated you like you were something precious, so gentle, so caring, but now he was so… rough. But you would be lying if you said you didn't like it.

You were brought back down to earth when Seungkwan moved up to your clit and slid two fingers into your entrance. With a gasp, you propped yourself on your elbows to look at his face. You could see his eyes were clouded with lust as he looked up at you, maintaining a hurried pace with his mouth. It was too much all at once; you dropped back down with a loud moan, causing him to rut against the side of the bed. He had never been this hard in his entire life, but he was determined to get you to finish first before he even thought of touching himself. He always knew you would taste good but never expected it to be this amazing.

“Fuck, I’m so close, baby, don’t stop!” You could barely get the words out before he slipped in a third finger, hitting that sweet spot right on the nose. Your face was scrunched up in pleasure; you had never felt this good.

“Come for me, baby, wanna feel you cum around me.” 

With a few more thrusts of his fingers, you felt your orgasm hit you like a tidal wave, washing over you from head to toe. You swore your vision blacked out for a second from the intensity.

By the time you came to your senses, Seungkwan had moved back up your body and was softly sucking hickeys into your neck and jaw.

“You did so good for me, honey, so good.” 

Still trying to catch your breath, you held the back of his head to pull him into a searing kiss. Your manicured nails grazing his scalp almost knocked him out; he let out a small huff as he pressed his forehead to yours, brown eyes meeting yours. 

“I love you so much, you know that? My sweet angel, so beautiful,” he murmurs, planting a soft kiss on your forehead as he reaches over to his nightstand to pull out a condom. You finally got a good glimpse of his hard cock as he rolled the rubber on; you had seen his dick before, but never this hard. The tip was an irritated shade of red, clear that he had been struggling for too long. 

“Wait.” 

Seungkwan paused what he was doing to look up at you, bewildered. You grabbed his arm to lead him to sit against the headboard and straddled his thighs. He looked up at you, slightly amused, and you said, “It’s my turn to take care of you.” 

He honestly thought he could’ve died then and there. The way your hair fell around your shoulders, framing your flushed face, and the borderline painful grip you had on his biceps nearly crushed him. He had never seen you like this, and it drove him crazy.

“I love you so much Kwannie, so much.”

You gave him no chance to respond as you sank down on him. Both of you let out loud groans, the tight fit sending pleasure throughout your bodies. You were grateful to gravity for helping you out, the sensation too overwhelming to focus on pushing it in voluntarily.

“You’re so tight, oh my God. Don’t move, please,” he sobbed. His hands flew to grip your hips with a grasp so tight you thought he would draw blood. You were left with nowhere to escape as the tip of his cock pressed against the deepest part of you, showing no mercy as he took the time to compose himself. He almost came when the entrance of your pussy squeezed his tip and couldn’t even think of continuing if you started moving right away. 

“You’re so big- fuck, baby. Can’t believe you even fit.”

Seungkwan groaned partly in pleasure and in panic as he desperately attempted to delay his orgasm. There was no way he would cum without seeing your face when you reached your high again.

After a few moments, you both were steady enough to return to reality, and you slowly started rutting against him. With each swivel of your hips, your moans got louder, and in no time you were bouncing up and down on his dick. Seungkwan’s grip only got tighter (if that was even possible) when he could feel himself hit that gummy spot inside you. He moved one of his hands up to your hair to pull your head back and expose your neck, where he returned to his previous marks that were already bruising beautifully. With an almost wicked smirk, he leaned into your body, nipping at your already sensitive skin. You jolted to a halt as the feeling shot down to your clit. It had been just a few minutes since your first orgasm, but you could already feel your second one fighting its way to the surface. 

“Can’t believe I’m the first one to see you like this, fuck! You look so sexy, baby, all fucked out for me. My pretty baby, you’re mine, right? You’re all for me? Only me.” 

Before you could respond, he had flipped you both over. You were back in the position you started in, and Seungkwan took the extra step to move your calves onto his shoulders. This was the deepest he had hit all night, fully bottoming out into you. Neither of you was going to last any longer. 

“Only you- Fuck- I’m coming again!” 

His pace was unrelenting as he got you to your second high of the night. You clenched around him for the last time, finally coaxing his orgasm. He fully came within a few more sturdy pumps before slowing to a stop, panting like crazy.

You took a little longer to recuperate, at which time Seungkwan had disposed of the condom and prepped a warm towel to clean you up.

“So beautiful, my love. You did such a good job. I’m so proud of you,” he kissed your temple firmly. This was better than any ending he could’ve imagined.

i hope u enjoyed :) feel free to let me know if anything is wrong or if my writing can be improved, i haven't written anything in like two years 😭 send any requests u have, I'll slowly get to them!

#kkyeomies #seventeen smut #svt smut #seungkwan smut #seungkwan fanfic #seungkwan fluff #seungkwan x reader #seventeen x reader #svt x reader #kkyeomies fic #kkyeomies answered #kkyeomies smut

[burned-lariat]

Hi, ChaLynn stan checking in to cheer you up

I peeped yesterday's show. Painful shit, I know. These garbage plots stinks. It angers me the writers are minimizing Chase's cop instincts, ignoring both his observations of Lincs treatment of both BLQ and Blaze for plot purposes. Who in their right believes Blqthink of how all this will magically reap sweet ChayLynn rewards in another few months. (I'm giddy with excitement 😬 seee?)

Brook Lynn Quartermaine will NOT sign that nda contract. She signs the nda and its GAME OVER. If she values her self respect (questionable atm) and keeping Chase in her life that nda won't mean much if she doesn't sign it. Dont give Linc another W. Her pride and fear is getting in the way again. Imma give her this one benefit of the doubt this time only. If Chase knew about the nda, Linc would be a dead duck.

These writers I swear...smh. I like Blaze, but if she shoots her shot with "detective" (again questionable atm) Chase, I won't be mad at all. Girls no fighting please.

Blaze is BLQs placeholder with the singing voice. They look similar in profiles. She is living out BLQs wildest dreams singing w/ Chase, the love of BLQ's life. What Blaze said to Chase about him reminding of her passion for music when they sing together, she didn't want him to leave cause she feels safe around him, still stuck in a contract with Linc, that's BLQ. Blaze is verbalizing what BLQ isn't saying to Chase. Some detective he is. Hahaha. Silly concept.

How is Chase to know how BLQ feels when he can't wait to move on with his life without her. (liar liar pants on fire) Boy has it bad for her, can't ya tell. Lol

BLQ is in deep (awww). I haven't seen that look of despair on her face since she had to give back Bailey Lou. Yes, losing Chase is right up there. They were a little family unit at one time.. times that pain x10. It will get worse before for her tho. I can't wait for ChaLynn's official ILY. eeek!

🥰 Shoot I'm waiting on Sprina too, lucky me. Im not sure what happens in a couple if months from now cause I don't read spoilers. If this miserable mushball wants happiness, she's gonna have to fight for it. BLQ lost her voice once, she can't let Linc take it away from her again. This year's Nurses Ball will be the first since Nelle attacked her. I don't believe those emotional wounds have healed since then.

She's watching the love of her life slip away from her. We should be enjoying this "journey" that their on, no matter the cheese factor. We already know how Chase feels about BLQ, were waiting for her to catch up with him. (run BLQ run)

Endgame. Endgame. Endgame!

Update: I'm presently working on my one shot fic for you guys. Im rusty but ChayLynn is motivation. This is catharsis for me till we get over this slump. Hang in there.

Stay tuned. ❤

Yeah, the dumbing down of Chase and upping the selfishness of BLQ isn't working for anyone. Idk how the writers could think it does.

I have yet to see yesterday's episode, but I know that Chalynn was not one of the highlights, so I dread that viewing experience. I thought BLQ already agreed to sign the NDA, or she already did sign it, but is that not the case? If so, I hope she doesn't sign that crap. The serial sexual harassment is something that he can absolutely be nailed for.

I like Blaze a lot, and I think she has great chem with Chase. I absolutely wouldn't mind them having a fling or a genuine relationship (and it won't last too long since Blaze likely isn't going to stay).

I feel like Chase is still too angry at BLQ for what she did to come down and realize he still loves her, and while I'm glad there is a lasting consequence, I'm still not okay with BLQ getting worse treatment than Millow when Millow also wronged Chase brutally.

I wish we had a new Bailey Lou story, that or we fast-forward to them being back tovefht and saying their "I Love Yous." I want to enjoy the journey, but we've waited for years, and once we got what we wanted, it got taken away from us immediately. At this rate, I want shortcuts and proper redemption. If they're meant to be "long-term," the show should act like it.

And that's amazing! I can't wait to read it (and I will share any related links for it)! I'm glad it's working as catharsis. And thank you for the cheering up, it's always appreciated ❤️

#general hospital #asks - gh

[falcons-wings]

an easy mission

sam wilson x reader

summary: the reader gets hurt on a mission where they received bad intel (this is a terrible summary but we move)

warnings: fighting, injuries, blood, swearing, guns, knives (i think that’s it?? pls tell me if there’s anything else)

wc: 1.5k+

masterlist

a/n: i’ve written for quite a few different fandoms but never marvel for some reason idk, but i love this man with all my heart and he does not nearly get the love he deserves so i thought i’d write this little work for him - also i havent written in a while so im rusty so apologies in advance - hope you enjoy :)

This was meant to be an easy mission. A nice break from all the stress, fighting and pain you had been experiencing recently since you started working with Sam and Bucky. You had even been sent in on your own to where the target was supposed to be whilst the boys kept watch because it was, as Sam so incorrectly said, “a simple in and out job”.

You had decided it was not a simple in and out job.

The target you had to extract was only meant to have two of his men guarding him, hence the easy part of the job, but the twelve guys who were now all either pointing guns at you or in fighting stances, proved that information very wrong.

It didn’t take long for all hell to break loose - there were gunshots flying everywhere as you began taking out some of the men closest to you. You threw a couple of knives from your harness at two of the men who had guns, not even looking to see if they had hit the mark (but you knew they did - you never missed) before running at the guy closest to you. A swift kick to his stomach followed by an elbow to the face was all it took to for him to go down, allowing you to focus on the other guys now approaching you - and a couple more knives were thrown in succession, getting rid of all but one of the shooters before you engaged in hand to hand combat with two of the assailants.

“Y/n? Is everything alright in there?” Sam’s voice spoke through the comm.

“Oh, everything’s just peachy Sam, I just want to say-“ You felt a sharp pain in your abdomen, interrupting your train of thought and speech, but your momentary pause cost you when one of the guys you were fighting got lucky with a hit to your face. Annoyed that you had let down your guard and most likely had a broken nose now, you kicked your leg out towards his shin and as he tripped slightly, you elbowed him in the gut and pulled his arm down as you rolled towards the floor, flipping him over so his front collided with the ground hard enough to knock him unconscious.

You turned your attention back to the remaining assailants when you registered Sam shouting your name over the comms.

“What Sam? I’m a little busy.”

“You stopped mid sentence I thought something had happened, we were about to come and see if you needed help.” You could hear the worry in his voice but the stubborn part of you still refused to ask for help from them even though they were your friends and you knew they wouldn’t think any less of you.

“No it’s all good here, I was just going to say that we’re never listening to your informant ever again and if we do, you’re getting sent into the hideout.”

“What? Why?”

“Well it turns out the two guys guarding the target,” you tackled the last armed guy to the ground, stabbing him in the chest in the process before getting back up and approaching the last couple of people left, “was actually twelve so I’ve not been having the best time here.”

“Shit. We’re coming in.” You could hear him saying something to Bucky but you didn’t care as this was when you noticed the original target was no longer in your sight, only two very angry looking dudes.

“No I’ve got this handled, but I’ve lost the target - he must’ve got away whilst I was distracted. Sorry.”

“Don’t apologise y/n, Barnes is going to get the target and I’m coming to you.”

Before you could respond to him, the last two guys came charging at you. You ducked underneath the arm of one, dodging the knife he had trained on you, and kicked him in the back with enough force that he fell to the floor and didn’t get back up. This left only one who swung at your face, which you sidestepped out the way of, but unfortunately failed to see him swing his leg out to kick you in the stomach. You stepped back, doubled over in pain for a moment, but quickly recovered and took out the last knife from your harness, throwing it at his chest with perfect accuracy as he made another approach at you.

The body fell to the floor just as you heard loud footsteps running into the room behind you. Still on high alert you spun to fight this next person but instead relaxed when you saw Sam run into the room and stop in his tracks when he looked at you.

“I did say I had it handled.” You smiled smugly at him, ignoring the stab of pain from your nose at the movement, but the smile quickly faded when he still didn’t say anything, not even one of his normal comebacks.

“What? Is there something wrong?”

He shook his head slightly and began walking slowly towards you, “Y/n, you’re bleeding. We need to get you help.”

“It’s just a broken nose Sam, trust me I’ve survived worse.”

He was right in front of you now, his dark eyes conveying so much worry as he looked you over more closely. “No y/n, we need to get you to a hospital.”

You didn’t get what he was on about until he angled his head at your stomach, where you could now see the bullet wound you must’ve received in the mess of the fight bleeding profusely.

“Oh. Well that’s not ideal.”

You stumbled slightly as you started registering the pain you were in, the adrenaline from the fight beginning to wear off now. Sam was quick to steady you with his arms, and the concern on his face, his concern for you, warmed your heart a little even amidst the pain.

He manoeuvred you to the floor to rest whilst he spoke to Bucky over the comms to update him on the situation, and it might’ve been the blood loss speaking but you couldn’t help but think to yourself that he looked even more attractive than normal. He raised an eyebrow at you when he caught you staring, and quickly shaking the thoughts out of your head you began speaking.

“I’m sorry, I fucked up, I didn’t want to call for back up so you would know I can handle things and then I lost the target and then apparently got injured in the mess. All in all not my best mission, so I’m sorry.”

He shook his head at you, crouching down in front of you, “No y/n, you have absolutely nothing to apologise for. This is 100% on me and I’m so so sorry - I hate to see you get hurt, and that’s exactly what happened here.”

“How’s it on you?”

“It was my informant who gave the wrong information which I believed without confirming it, and then you went in here with no back up. You could’ve died y/n. I- No, we, can’t handle another loss, especially if it was you, you mean too much to Bucky and I now.” He looked down at his hands, avoiding your eyes, “I’ll do better next time.”

You hated how sad and broken he looked as he admitted this to you, and bad injuries or not, you were having none of his wallowing today. “Listen to me here Samuel Wilson - you are not to blame for this, sometimes there is bad intel and that’s just something we have to deal with. And if you will not let me blame myself for anything that’s gone wrong today then I ban you from thinking the same about yourself okay?”

He finally looked up at you to see the sincerity in your eyes and gave a small smile, “Okay.”

“I hate to break up the moment,” you both sat up quickly, ready to fight, to see Bucky approaching the two of you and dragging the target behind him, “but we need to get you to a hospital and this guy to a cell.”

“That might be a good idea as my vision is starting to go a little blurry.”

“Shit, okay, I’m gonna pick you up is that alright?” Sam asked, only needing a nod from you before you were in his arms bridal style and following Bucky out of the building.

As you approached the vehicle you were using, you poked Sam’s cheek to get his attention.

“I don’t want to see you get hurt either by the way, you mean too much to me as well.”

His eyes shined as he looked down at you, but his attention was quickly caught by Bucky muttering under his breath “God, just kiss already, you two make me feel sick.”

You huffed a laugh, ignoring your own blushing cheeks, and instead looked at Sam who had his own red cheeks and was now glaring at Bucky with a look, that if it could, would kill him.

He soon gave up with glaring at his friend, and instead looked down at you with a small, possibly hopeful smile on his face that you readily returned.

#I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO POST THIS FOR OVER A DAY WHY DOES THIS SITE HATE ME?????? #also it is very on brand for me for my first work in a fandom to be a fic where someone gets hurt #some say i should go to therapy but i say writing does the job almost as well :) #falcons-wings #sam wilson #sam wilson x reader #the falcon and the winter soldier #bucky barnes #anthony mackie #tfatws #marvel #mcu #bucky barnes x reader #mcu imagine #sam wilson imagine #james buchanan barnes #sambucky #sam wilson fic

[9tzuyu]

children of tragedy (rewrite)

note: heyo, rewriting an old fic of mine. i hope to be able to rewrite all 5 chapters quickly. if you guys don’t like it, i won’t continue because its kinda dark and idk i feel like no ones gonna like it anyways. please leave feedback though, im on my knees begging for validation. also sorry if its ooc, please forgive me.

++ sorry the beginning reveals how rusty my writing is </3

(*** i wrote this as as a fem reader fic because it worked easier with how i wrote things.)

+ please remember that this is purely a way to get out my own feelings/struggles in a healthy way. also i’m sure this works better as a ship fic, but someone asked for this version so yeah :).

** mistakes are mine im too tired and lazy to proofread right now.

warnings: talk of alcohol abuse, slight mention of domestic abuse.

🏷 @peggycarter-steverogers

ch.2 | ch.3

[love, fragility, and the memories that eat us alive.]

meeting wanda changed everything for you. she wasn't like anyone you’d ever known. she was always kind, never quick to lose her temper or scream and yell at you for things you couldn't possibly control. she was warm, tender with everything she did.

your relationship with her was very new to you. it was much different in comparison to your past experiences — and you weren't quite sure what to think of it. there was no doubt that you appreciated her and everything she did for you, but you were still waiting for her to snap. it was almost like a need burning throughout your body. being able to grasp the idea that someone could ever really, truly be gentle with you was out of the question. in turn, you’d push all of her buttons, hoping that she would get mad enough and get it over with.

no one could really fault you for it. the steady stream of abuse was the nearly the entirety of your life, both physical and mental.

lately wanda was having to pick you up from wherever she could find you, most of the time in the alleyways of of bars you’d been kicked from.

once you were drunk enough (anyone really) you weren’t afraid to say the first thing that came to your mind, offensive or not – which meant it was no surprise when you’d been involved in fights. the alcohol numbed a majority of the pain anyway, so didn’t really make much of a difference to you.

with this happening so many times, you figured wanda would be angry with you – perhaps so angry she would find it within her to hit you. but each and every time wanda brought you home, she made sure you were comfortable before tending to your inuries.

what you didn't know was that being so worried for you all the time, every second of everyday, was beginning to take a toll on her. wanda only wanted to fix you, but you were making it more than difficult for her to do that.

she knew very little about your past, simply because you didn't like talking about it and she didn't want to push. but there was no denying the fact that wanda was curious.

sometimes she would ask questions, only between the soft moments the both of you shared. much to her dismay, most of her curiosities were turned down. on the rare occasions you shared brighter memories of your childhood, wanda would bookmark them in the back of her head.

no harm would ever come from her, but you didn’t know that. at least not right now.

too many times had your exes used the trust you’d so politely given against you. to be fair with wanda though, you shared only the brightest parts of your childhood. they were very seldom, but the ones you could remember were the ones you enjoyed talking about the most. 

despite her limited knowledge, it wasn’t hard for her to tell that you’d already been hurt plenty of times before. apart from the fact that wanda was overall truly a good person, it made her even more gentle with you than she’d ever been with anyone before. 

on top of that, wanda wasn’t stupid. she picked up on every little flinch you tried to hide, or the times you had to ask her if it was okay if you could do something on your own free will, and she definitely didn’t forget about the countless times you berated yourself over small, humanly mistakes. a frown never failed to decorate her face when these things happened. 

wanda tried her hardest to make it known how much she loved you, and how she would never intentionally hurt you. she never once lifted a hand on you or raised her voice in the slightest, even when she felt like she’d met a breaking point.

the last few weeks seemed to be putting more stress on her than usual. the gashes on your body seemed to be cutting deeper and the bruises on your jaw and rib cage were beginning to turn a darker shade of indigo as each fight became more aggressive. your knuckles had been swollen, irritated to the point your hands trembled when your palms were held open.  

you completely missed how drastically wanda’s mood had changed. she became quiet, seemingly lost in thought most of the time until she needed to take care of you. she grew tired, a purple tint claiming a spot below the lip of her eyes. fifteen pounds of weight had shredded from her body and her head grew dizzy every time she stood up. none of that mattered to wanda though, you were her number one priority.

alcohol was the biggest issue in the way. if wanda could get you to stop drinking for just one night she might be able to reason with you. 

the brunette knew that was out of the question though, because she knew no matter how many times she told or expressed her love for you, you wouldn’t stop until you wanted to, not when she wanted you to. 

you never allowed yourself to be vulnerable around her, so she never knew how you truly felt about the things going wrong in your life. there was an unbearable amount of pain when it came to confronting what you tried so hard to push away. the idea of allowing yourself to heal, to mourn the things taken away from you caused a lump in the back of your throat. living in denial was the easiest way to cope - that was as long as you could bear the damage it created.

 (and whether wanda knew it or not, knowing that you were causing her so much misery was the worst feeling you’d ever faced. all she had ever given you was love and in return she was met with destruction.)

so once again you found yourself walking alone, a slight stagger between steps. it was cold, each breath exhaled from your lips could be seen vaporizing into the air. every movement ripped what balance you thought you’d gained right out from underneath you. the feeling of numbness in your fingertips brought your attention away from the fact that you didn’t know where you were. 

the buildings all looked familiar, but everything was hazy. being drunk wasn’t always the fun everyone bragged about. too tired to carry on, you found yourself slumped in the back of an alleyway next to a dirty garbage bin. it reeked of sour, expired food, but you’d given up on caring about anything else other than trying to drink yourself numb. 

your mind began to wander. flashes of early mornings with wanda’s hands wrapped around your waist, breath tickling the back of your neck while the sun began to rise started filling your thoughts. the warm feeling wanda gave you outweighed every bad emotion you could possibly think of.

but as you stared at the ground beneath your feet things began to spiral. your throat contracted, the guilt you tried so hard to swallow began clawing its way out of your body.

(and holy fuck you could not deal with this right now.)

you curled your head between your legs in an attempt to shield yourself away from something that was born from the inside.

it was too much.

without a chance to stop what was happening, your stomach began heaving. a mix of bile and alcohol drooled from your mouth as you continued to vomit.

you missed the sound of footsteps coming from behind you. the feeling of a hand on your shoulder caused you to jerk back, slamming your back into the brick wall.

“hey, hey, it’s me. you’re okay. it’s just me, wanda.” she cooed.

through teary eyes, you looked up at the woman in front of you.

she’s your girlfriend.

(but you weren’t sure that you deserved to call her that after everything you’ve put her through.)

“what are you doing here?” your voice wavered as you wiped your mouth free of excess vomit. you sniffled backing away from her.

she tilted her head, desperate to read what your eyes would give away. “i’m here to bring you back home. can you stand up for me?” you shook your head. you were too exhausted and dizzy from the alcohol to even think about standing.

“that’s okay,” she whispered. “here, i’m going to pick you up, okay? wrap your arms around my neck and your legs around my hips.”

“mkay.” your speech was still slurred, but at that point all wanda cared about was getting you home safe.

you didn’t remember the ride home or wanda carrying you out of the car to lay you on the couch. by the time she got the supplies she needed to wrap and tend to your wounds, you were completely passed out.

when you woke up you were greeted with a glass of water and an over the counter pain medication. you swallowed the pills and moved to set the glass on the coffee table, but wanda beat you to it and took it out of your hands. she smiled down at you, taking a seat next to you. she tucked your hair behind your ears, giving your face one last gentle stroke.

thats when you noticed her eyes were red.

you immediately sat up, crossing your legs and moved closer to her. you’d hoped to comfort her somehow, but the shake of her head broke sonething inside you.

you bit your lip, anxiety shooting throughout your body. she sensed your nervousness and took your hands in hers, rubbing circles on the outside of your wrist with her thumbs.

“i love you, you know that. at least i hope you do,” she let out a soft laugh. “but i can’t keep doing this.”

your heart dropped, and you could feel the all too familiar feeling of guilt building its way back up. you tried to speak, but wanda cut you off.

“i need you to hear this.”

when you didn’t respond she took the opportunity to continue saying what she needed to get out.

“i have exhausted myself to a breaking point. i can’t keep worrying about you every single night you’re gone. i can’t be there every time you need saving. i’m losing myself.”

she paused to check and see how you were handling her words. for once you weren’t shutting down. you were genuinely trying to process what she was trying to say.

(and she was so proud of you for that. she almost considered giving you another chance. but she knew for the better, she couldn’t do that. not to you, not to her.)

“i’ve packed your things. you can leave tomorrow morning if you wish, i don’t mind having you for another meal or two.”

she squeezed your hands and got up from the couch, allowing you to take in what she said. it was in that moment when you realized that even when she’d finally drawn the line, had enough, she didn’t yell at you. she wasn’t angry, she was just sad.

you were chasing after something that wasn’t there, and it never would be there.

and now you were able to register just how much you’d fucked up the one good thing in your life.

#wanda maximoff x reader #scarlet witch x reader #wanda maximoff fic #wanda maximoff x you #wanda maximoff imagine #avengers imagine #avengers fanfiction

[a-small-batch-of-dragons]

Not Bad

Prompts: Hihi, i have a Merlin prompt if you're interested. Merlin thinks he's a bad person bec he was taught that magic is bad, but also Bec of all the stuff he did/does to keep Arthur safe and ig throw in some touch starved!Merlin too for fun. But the knights compliment/hug/etc all the time and Merlin just doesn't understand what he's supposed to do with this, so the solution is to breakdown crying and try to convince the knights he's the bad person he sees himself as and the knights are just like "but you're wrong and he's 25 reasons why you're wrong" Plz, thx, love your writing - anon

im a fuckin sucker for soft knights & arthur w merlin so, if ur still takings reqs, i would love to see when the knights realize merlin still views himself as a "monster" like is hinted in first ep (? i thinkk, im rusty on my merlin trivia)- is it a passing comment he makes and they realize all together? knight cuddle pile? just give the poor boy some love - anon

if you'd want to write it i'd love to see the collective moment that the knights realize that merlin is self-harming in some way (in my brain this is probably in like a denial-of-things type thing that he probably doesn't even see as self-harm bc he's an idiot, could even be something like healing everyone else w magic but refusing to heal himself... idk feel free to do whatever you see fit!). i can only imagine they'd be frustrated with him and themselves but theyre just loving large idiots (': - anon

ahh yes all the prompts

Read on Ao3 Part 2

Warnings: implied/referenced self-harm in the form of intentionally depriving oneself of physical contact because THAT COUNTS

Pairings: merthur, can be platonic or romantic I don't care

Word Count: 3462

Arthur is confused, very upset, and nothing is alright anymore, thank you very much.

Because you see, despite the image that he tries to present—emphasis on the word ‘try’, there, according to his knights—he does care an awful lot about his people, especially his one particular person that happens to be able to say an awful lot without saying anything.

Merlin. He’s talking about Merlin, in case you hadn’t noticed.

The problem is that for all the man can ramble on about seemingly anything, at any time, he’s remarkably good at saying absolutely nothing about himself. He claims he’s an open book, but he’s certainly in a language that Arthur doesn’t know how to read.

He does know how to read, just to clarify. That isn’t the issue here.

No, no, the issue is that after months, years, almost a decade of Merlin by his side, watching his back, taking care of him, he’s discovered that there’s a secret that Merlin’s keeping from him. One he never intended to tell Arthur.

And before you panic, no, he’s not talking about Merlin’s magic.

Come on, it’s not like it’s not obvious, the man isn’t exactly good at hiding it. Does he seriously believe Arthur can’t see the tree branches that miraculously pick themselves up and fly at the nearest bandit or the spears that fling themselves at the foe about to behind Gwaine? Or the chores that mysteriously get done too fast for Merlin and far too efficiently? Or the way certain magical ailments seem to vanish mysteriously along with his idiot of a servant only to be greeted with a soft shrug when he pokes?

Merlin’s eyes also turn gold, that’s pretty neat.

So Merlin has magic.

Yes, we know, we had a small tantrum over the fact that he told Lancelot first, but it’s fine. Quite frankly, a lot of things make more sense now.

Except for this. Not this.

Merlin is hiding the secret that he believes he’s a bad person.

Now, Arthur’s not sure if you’ve met Merlin, but the man isn’t exactly the image of the evildoer that springs to mind when someone says ‘bad person.’

The Witch Finder, now there’s a bad person. Storming into Camelot, preying on the fear of the people, bribing and threatening and drugging people, torturing them, and condemning them to death just for the sake of a few coins.

Merlin did storm into Camelot, that is true, but he decided to pick a fight with the crown prince and then save his life. He’s not here for coin—if he were, they wouldn’t have had that small, er, issue about the steward not paying him anything for his work for the past eight years, honestly—and he’s certainly not preying on anyone’s fears. Except perhaps Arthur’s fear of losing his dignity.

The look on his father’s face when Merlin dodged the pillow…

Speaking of his father…there’s another one.

His father did not prey as openly on the people’s fear—or as obviously as Aredian, but prey on them he did. He was a strong king, sometimes too strong. He was a blind king, saw the people as nothing more than subjects, not the living breathing humans they are. He remembers Morgana’s voice, saying that authority should derive from the consent of the governed, not from the threat of force.

He always wanted to see Uther’s face when his ward—when his daughter said that to him.

And what he’s done to Morgana…

Arthur grimaces and shakes his head. Perhaps the very truth that he resents the idea of thinking about what Uther did to Morgana, to him…perhaps that is enough.

Those are bad people. At least to Arthur.

Merlin, on the other hand…

Merlin came into Camelot, knowing that if it was discovered that he has magic, he would be burnt at the stake. He came, not with any aspirations of glory, simply because he trusted his mother when she told him to come to Gaius. He came and he was given a job he never asked for, one he had no idea how to do, and stayed.

Merlin learned. Slowly, perhaps, but he learned. Now he has enough knowledge on what a servant should do to break the rules in the most spectacular fashion. Arthur smiles, biting back the chuckle at seeing George dressed up like Merlin and acting perfectly proper and the urge Arthur had to throw him out of the room.

And that’s not even mentioning what he does when he’s not following Arthur around.

Merlin learned. Merlin stayed.

Not just for Gaius, but for Arthur.

Arthur leans onto his desk, staring out into the courtyard where Merlin is tending to the knights’ horses as they mount up for patrol. He watches Leon step a little closer, lowering his head to mutter something to him, watching Gwaine clap Merlin on the shoulder.

Watches Merlin flinch a little too hard.

Watches Leon’s brow furrow and Gwaine take a step back.

This. This is the problem.

Merlin believes he’s a bad person. Which is wrong, but for some reason, he does.

And because Merlin believes he’s a bad person, he believes that anytime one of the knights touches him—or anyone touches him—it will be to hurt him.

How did they come to this conclusion, you may ask?

Arthur bites back a snarl as he turns away from the window.

It had started with the complements.

Gwaine, to no one’s surprise, was quite fond of flirting with anyone and everyone that would let him, Merlin no exception. Talking about Merlin’s looks, his personality, his work ethic, anything, and everything. Merlin would flush, bright red, ears and all, mumbling to himself.

But then Percival had said something and Merlin pushed him away—well, prodded his arm, no one really moves Percival without Percival letting them—and shook his head. Percival had shrugged but the rest of them had noticed the tension in Merlin’s shoulders.

Then Elyan complemented Merlin’s tracking abilities and Merlin hadn’t even acknowledged it, instead insisting that they keep moving before it got too dark to see and they’d be forced to make camp in the woods. They’d agreed, pressing on, but noting the way that Merlin refused to say so much as thank you.

Leon’s perceptiveness should be considered magical. Seriously, Arthur’s not entirely convinced the man can’t see into people’s heads, what with the information he’s able to produce out of nothing more than the twitch of a finger or the slightest huff of breath. But he sees the way Merlin shies away from any display of affection, even as he gently repeats it, watching Merlin turn his back and get back to work.

Arthur never saw what happened with Lancelot. All he knows is that one night, out in the woods, the two of them had gone off to collect firewood and Merlin had been hiding red-rimmed eyes when he returned, a few paces ahead of Lancelot, not ten minutes later. Arthur had glared but the forlorn confusion on Lancelot’s face had given him pause.

Then it was the touching.

One would expect Merlin to be a quite tactile person, and he is. He’s all shoulder nudges and pokes and prods and gentle shoves to get people to move where he wants them to go. And it’s not like the man has much concept of personal space.

No, some of that is not Arthur’s fault, how dare you?

But when someone else tries it, Merlin tenses reflexively, already moving before their hands make contact. He gives everyone he can a wide berth, scuttling around the outside of rooms until one of them breaks and tells him to come here, Merlin, it’s alright, we won’t hurt you. His face never quite believes them.

The strangest thing is how much of it Merlin makes small adjustments for.

He always wears those god-awful tunics, that he won’t let Arthur replace with fabric that doesn’t feel like it’s a burlap sack, with the sleeves pulled all the way down and those kerchiefs tied around his neck. Arthur’s seen his sleeves rolled up before, but only when Merlin’s working and he hasn’t realized Arthur’s there yet. It’s not like Arthur doesn’t know Merlin has forearms, but Merlin will always jump and guiltily roll his sleeves down.

He doesn’t notice why until he accidentally brushes Merlin’s bare skin once and Merlin all but tears away like he’s been burned.

He doesn’t know why.

Merlin has a secret. The secret is that he believes he’s a bad person. That means he can’t accept compliments and he can’t let them touch him.

This is a problem, because Arthur would very much like for Merlin to believe that he isn’t a bad person.

This is also a problem because Arthur has no idea how to do that.

He looks up when there’s a knock on the door.

“Enter.”

“Sire?” Leon steps through. “May we come in?”

Arthur nods, his eyebrows raising as all of his knights spill into the room.

“Shall I assume you’re on the warpath again?”

“Nah,” Gwaine grumbles, throwing himself into a chair, “know this isn’t your fault.”

Leon shakes his head. “It’s Merlin, sire, we’re…concerned.”

Arthur just sighs and tells them what’s been buzzing around his head for the past…however long it’s been. The knights nod.

“He doesn’t like to be touched when he doesn’t expect it,” Lancelot offers, “but when I ask…he doesn’t seem to want to agree either.”

“But he does,” Gwaine argues, “you’ve seen the way he stares at us when we hug each other, he looks like a poor child that’s never had a hug in his life!”

“Which isn’t true.” Elyan folds his arms. “Gwen’s hugged him.”

“We’ve all hugged him.”

“But he still thinks we’re going to hurt him.”

“Well,” Arthur mutters, “we can’t exactly blame him for being paranoid, can we?”

“If you lot are going to talk about me behind my back like it’s a war council, then yeah, I reserve the right to be paranoid.”

“Merlin!”

“Thank god, where’ve you been?”

“I thought we were meeting by the stables.”

“Did you get hurt?”

Merlin raises his hands and takes a step back. “Whoa, can I get through the door first before the interrogation starts?”

“This isn’t an interrogation,” Arthur says, glaring at the knights, “we’re concerned.”

“Uh-huh,” Merlin mutters, weaving through them to the table so he can set down the thing hooked over his arm, “yes, I’m all too familiar with your concern.”

Arthur frowns. “What does that mean?”

Merlin waves a hand. “Oh, just that it’s a prelude to more chores and things to do.”

Is that…true?

“Yes.”

Did he say that out loud?

“Also yes.”

Arthur shakes his head. “Merlin, we’re not coming up with lists and lists for chores for you to do.”

“Really? With how many you all constantly give me, here I finally thought I’d cracked the code as to why.”

Leon steps forward. “We’re not coming up with things to give you, Merlin, nor are we intending to gossip behind your back.”

“So what are you doing?”

“We’re worried,” Lancelot repeats, “about you.”

“Well, I’m right as rain, no need to worry.”

“Lie.”

Merlin’s eyes go wide and he stares at Leon. The knight smiles ruefully and takes another little step forward.

“Lie,” he repeats gently, “you don’t have to lie to us, Merlin.”

Merlin’s mouth thins. “Maybe I don’t want to tell you, then.”

“Why not—“

“No,” Arthur breaks in, causing Merlin to swing his head around again, “no, if Merlin doesn’t want to tell us he doesn’t have to.”

Gwaine looks on the verge of protest, but another look from Lancelot is enough to quell him. He sinks into the chair and tosses an apple to Merlin.

“At least eat something,” he says by way of explanation, “you’ve not eaten anything since lunch.”

Merlin looks very confused—good, now he’s just like the rest of them—but bites into the apple nonetheless. His gaze travels around the room before coming to rest on Leon.

“Why are you all concerned?”

“Because you won’t let us complement you, Merlin,” Leon says softly, “you believe that every time we touch you we intend to hurt you, and you believe that this is deserved because you are a bad person.”

The flabbergasted look on Merlin’s face is almost enough to make Arthur laugh. Almost.

“How…”

“We notice things, Merlin,” Leon says patiently, “we notice you.”

Lancelot snorts. “Good going, mate, you’ll freak him out.”

“Um—there’s nothing worth noticing about me—“

“Not we all know that’s not true,” Gwaine says, and if it had been any other time it would’ve sounded like the next pick-up line at the tavern, “you’re worth noticing, Merlin.”

Merlin’s gaze darts back and forth, finding no disagreement in any faces.

“What—what were you concerned about?”

“Aside from what we just told you?”

“But I don’t—why is that a problem?”

Arthur swallows a curse. “Are you asking why we’re upset that you believe you’re a bad person and you deserve to be treated badly?”

“…yes?”

“Because you’re not a bad person,” Elyan says, “and you don’t deserve to feel like everyone’s about to hurt you.”

Gods, the look of disbelief on Merlin’s face hurts.

“You don’t know that,” he says lowly, setting the apple down, “you don’t know that.”

“Sure we do.” Elyan uncrosses his arms. “We know you, Merlin.”

“I don’t think you do.”

A look passes around the group of knights. Elyan smiles.

“I know that Gwen came home and told me she’d made a friend the first week you arrived in Camelot. I know that you’ve reminded us what family means. I know that you care, Merlin, about your friends, because they’re important to you.”

Merlin blinks in confusion.

“I know you’re a strong man,” Percival says, “and not just because you can lift the packs for the horses without complaining. But you work hard, because you know you can, and so that people don’t have to. You provide what you can because you know what it’s like to have nothing.”

“I—I—“

“I know you’re brave,” Lancelot says softly, standing, “I know you feel the same fear that we all do and you stare it straight in the face.”

He pauses, takes one step closer.

“I know you don’t chase the glory of being brave, but the feeling of being brave and using it.”

“Guys, I—“

“I know what you’ve done.”

Merlin’s face goes pale at Leon’s words.

The knight tilts his head to the side and smiles.

“I’ve been around the longest,” he says in a near whisper, “and I have seen the changes from when you arrived in Camelot until now. I’ve seen the differences, not just in the other men in this room but in Camelot.”

He lays a hand on his chest.

“I know that you’ve made me prouder to serve this kingdom than many others that have tried.”

Poor Merlin is shaking right now, his fingers trembling on the edge of the table. He looks around in confusion, terribly frightened, sending more aches through Arthur’s chest.

“You wouldn’t say that—“ he gasps— “you wouldn’t say that if you knew the truth.”

“And what truth is that?”

“That—that I—“ Merlin’s breaths start to ring in the chamber— “I—I—“

“That you have magic?”

Merlin’s head jerks around to stare at Arthur. Arthur raises his hands and takes a step closer. Merlin flinches.

“It’s alright, Merlin,” Arthur says softly, “I’m not angry. I’m not going to hurt you. You have magic, though, right?”

“Yes—yes, I—but I’ve only ever used it for—for you Arthur, I—“

“Easy,” he soothes, fighting the urge to reach out and pull him close, “I know. It’s alright.”

“No, it’s not,” Merlin all but whimpers, “it’s not okay, it’s bad, it’s bad and I’m bad, I’m bad—“

“You’re not.”

“I am!”

Merlin yanks his arms to his sides, curling them tightly around himself, much to the protest of the knights. His fingers whiten as he clutches the sides of his tunic.

“I’m bad, bad people get hurt, you don’t—you don’t touch bad people.”

“Merlin,” Arthur breaks in softly, “Merlin, sweetheart, I’m going to come over to you.”

He can hear the quickly stifled gasps and Gwaine’s ‘oh shit’ as he inches towards Merlin. The poor man doesn’t move, but the tremors get worse and worse the closer Arthur gets.

“I’m right here,” he murmurs, “I won’t hurt you, sweetheart, do you believe me? That I won’t hurt you?”

“I—I—“

“Because I won’t,” he promises, still fighting the urge to swoop the poor thing into a hug, “I’ll never hurt you, sweetheart.”

“Why not?”

“Because you’re not bad, Merlin, and you certainly don’t deserve to be hurt.”

“You don’t know that,” comes the strangled whisper, “you don’t know what I’ve done.”

“But I know you, Merlin,” Arthur murmurs, “and that’s enough.”

He can’t stop the concerned noise at Merlin’s huff of disbelief.

“It’s enough, sweetheart, it’s—hey! Easy, easy,” he soothes as Merlin’s knees buckle and he catches him before he can hit the ground, “I’ve got you, shh, shh, you’re alright.”

“Oh,” Lancelot murmurs as Merlin starts to shiver terribly, “oh, Merlin, you’re touch starved.”

“Touch starved?”

“He’s not been touched for a very long time,” Lancelot murmurs, hustling to join them on the floor, scooping Merlin’s legs into his lap, “and so he’s not used to it, but he needs it.”

“We all need touch?”

“Yes, otherwise our bodies get…unhappy.” Lancelot shakes his head. “I’m sure Gaius could explain it more. The short version is humans aren’t built to hold each other at arm’s length.”

Arthur tightens his grip on the lapful of shaking Merlin he has. There’s a cold nose buried in the crook of his neck, arms looping awkwardly around his shoulders. Distantly, he hears the scufflings of the other knights as they move closer.

“We’ve got you, sweetheart,” he fins himself whispering, “we’ve got you, we won’t hurt you, you’re safe, you’re good, we have you, it’s alright, now…”

Poor Merlin is still shuddering terribly.

“Shh, shh, easy, just try and relax, we have you…”

Since when has Merlin been this cold?

“Oh, I’m definitely hugging you every day,” Gwaine mutters, helping to prop Merlin up away from the table.

“Why—“ Merlin swallows— “why are you all so warm?”

“You’re cold,” Arthur says, “we’re helping.”

“I’m—I’m—what is it? Touch—touch—“

“Touch starved,” Lancelot offers gently, “yes, Merlin.”

“You’re helping?”

Gwaine shifts behind him. “We’re helping.”

“You’re not…mad?”

“No, Merlin, we’re not mad.”

“I’m not bad?”

Arthur tightens his grip. “Never, Merlin.”

“You—I can—I can stay?”

“Yes, Merlin,” comes the chorus of knights, “for as long as you like.”

Arthur is still upset, very confused, and more than a little overprotective right now.

But so is Merlin.

And they’re…they’re starting to figure it out.

One thing’s for sure: Arthur’s definitely pulling Merlin into bed to cuddle with him instead of getting up in the morning.

#merlin #bbc merlin #merlin bbc #arthur pendragon #merthur fic #merthur #fic #dragonbabbles

[violetnotez]

HC: Telekenesis Quirk! Reader

Anonymous:  You're such a good writer lmao can't relate. But Deku and Todoroki with a s/o who has a telekenesis quirk that gets harder to control the less she concentrates? Like she'll zone out and suddenly there's books stuck the the ceiling XD idk it just sounded cute to me

Ahhh thank you ya made ma heart feel all squishy :) And this is SO AdOrAbLeEeeeeeeE (PS- I havent written for Todoroki for a while so forgive me if my writing for him is a little rusty!)

(P.S.S)- I broke up the parts front Fluff and Angst for each boy because I felt this request could do well for both genres

(RULES | MASTERLIST| REQUESTS OPEN!!! :))

-----------------------------

DEKU

Fluff:

Izuku thinks your quirk is SO FREAKING COOOOOOOL

He obviously made a journal about your quirk, because you’re his girlfriend, OF COURSE he’s going to study your powers!!!

The journal first started out as just another addition to his superhero notes

He has little notes from when you two train about fighting styles would best suit you and techniques to help you control your quirk, since when you get distracted or daze off, your quirk will sometimes activate by itself

The journal was very sophisticated and platonic, really…. until it became a journal of just YOU

It's chock full of little things he loves about you, like how your laugh sounds like wind chimes that make his spine tingle in the most delicate way ever, or the way your hair smells so lovely like fruit it makes him go crazy every time he smells it

May or may not have went to the shampoo aisle of the grocery store smelling every bottle to see if its one you use

It's also full of little moments between you two that he never wants to forget

One of the most adorable things he has witnessed when your quirk took over (and, of course, wrote down-this boi has written EVERYTHING) was when you had laid your head in Izuku’s lap during a Dekusquad outing to the park

Everyone spent the whole day studying and occasionally running around like children, playing childish games, until everyone had sat down to eat and the tiredness began to set in

You were currently in a peaceful food coma, letting Midoriya play with your hair as the sun began to set, turning the sky into a beautiful mixture of oranges, pinks, and indigos

While the rest of his friends were busy playing a game of UNO, he took the time to admire how beautiful you were: your skin was tan and rosy from the sunset, your lashes thick, your lips a pretty shade of pink and slightly parted… he blushed, wondering how he had gotten so lucky to have you

Unknowing to Midoriya, you were beginning to daze off from his touch- whenever he played with your hair you were instantly calmed and, 9 times out of 10, would fall asleep

You sighed contently, allowing the softness of sleep to drape you, until….

“Y/n….y/nnn..wake up princess,” you heard your boyfriend’s sweet voice, muffled by the thickness of sleep you were still in. But something was wrong- he sounded almost ...desperate? Scared?

Your eyes shot open, a terrifying realization hitting you- you were levitating yourself.

You, of course, had done this before while sleeping, but there was always a roof over your head. Yeah, you would hit your head and it would hurt, but at least you weren’t flying into the open sky.

You gasped loudly in shock, feeling yourself drop rapidly to the ground

Izuku instantly reacted, using a tiny bit of One for All (like .00000001% of it) to make him rapidly sprint to catch you from your fall

You grasped Izuku’s shirt, feeling the soft skin and toned muscles that always made you feel safe, trying to make your heart stop pounding from the slight scare

Izuku looked down at you, blushing slightly from how quickly he reacted and how cute you looked cuddled up against him

“Are you alright?” he asked, worry laced in his tone

“Of course I am,” you replied, your voice still groggy from sleep, “you’re here.”

Angst:

*Warning: mentions of blood

You woke up, your hair matted to one side with dirt and- blood?- your head hurt, your ears ringing, the arm you landed on felt so sore you didnt even want to look down at the damage 

You looked around, your vision fuzzy at the sides, trying to process what was going on- you could hear cries, screams, the crackling of fire- “that’s right” you thought, “Im fighting villians”

You then heard a voice that made your blood run cold

“I wont let you hurt her anymore!” Deku screamed, making you look desperately to find him- there he was, badly tattered and limping, holding one side of his suit, where red and purple was staining his skin, the mint green sleeve of his suit ripped away

The powerful villian laughed a cruel chuckle, advancing on poor Deku’s broken stance 

“You think your little whines are going to stop me, kid? Your lucky your little girlfriend is pretty, or would have killed her by now. But a pretty little thing like that could be of use to me.”

He smiled a disgusting grin, his perverted thoughts making Deku instantly furious

“No, you won't touch her! I WONT LET YOU !” he screamed, his quirk creating a ball of green energy erupt around his body as he charged at the gigantic villain now running at him.

You stared desperately at the exchange, the whole time wondering how Izuku was even still standing while the villain looked untouched

Seeing your boyfriend charge him- you couldn't take it- you were terrified and angry and scared for his life, knowing he couldn't keep this up- he'd killed himself

“NOOOOOOOO!” you screamed with all your might, not realizing you were making the rubble around you float violently, giant pieces of fallen building flying into the sky, heading to the thing that was causing your pain- this villian who had the audacity to hurt your boyfriend

The villain tried to block the rubble from hitting him, with no luck- it overtook him, instantly burying him in a pile of rubble

Deku stared at the now silent villain, turning slowly to see you, battered and bloody, before you fell to the ground from over use of your quirk

-------------------------------------

TODOROKI

Fluff:

Todoroki first began to have feelings for you very early on- he found you to be the most beautiful girl he had ever seen with a heart made of gold.

 Whenever you two talked, he felt like you treated him like a person, not the “Son-of- Endeavor”, or “The-Boy-Who-Got-In-With-Reccomendations”- you truly talked to him to get to know him for who he was

It was refreshing and irritating at the same time- he was scared of any love and affection after what his father did to his poor mother, even though he desperately needed it

After months of containing his love for you, he realized-slowly- that you liked him back

You two were both in the library, completely alone

You of course didn't think Todokroki had feelings for you, as you did for him- you had accepted that you had a pitiful one-way admiration

With Todoroki’s presence merely a few feet away, you couldn't concentrate on your studies, but you couldnt bring yourself to leave

All you wanted to do was stare at the perfect separation of red and white in his hair, the scar that felt so mesmerizing and so him, that strong jawline that always made you feel weak in the knees….

Todoroki felt the tips of hair begin to lift slightly, as if a soft breeze was carrying him up. He watched as his book began to mysteriously lift in the air, the uncanny feeling of being watched making him turn sharply to look at you, an unreadable expression on his face

Todoroki’s piercing, mismatched eyes made you break from your daze, realizing you had been staring- and had used your quirk by accident

His book slammed back onto the table, his hair flopping back to his body, tickling his skin

He watched as you instantly looked down, fidgeting to get your books together hastily together, your cheeks a bright cherry red

He thought it was pretty cute, to see you so flustered 

Just as you were practically pacing out of the library to escape the embarrassing situation, Todoroki stopped in front of you, forcing you to stop as well

“I know you were staring at me.” he said matter-of-factly, making your whole face red

Why did he find that so irresistibly cute?

“I-I-I-uh-” you stuttered, having know idea what to say

You instinctively reached up to brush your hair behind your ear, but-

Todoroki grabbed your hand, his hand warm and calloused

“Would you like to accompany me... on a date tomorrow night?”He swallowed, a twinge of nervousness visible on his calm face

You stared, dumbfounded at the mysterious boy in front of you, not knowing really how things turned so well for you

“I-uh-yes!” you smiled, “I’d love to.”

Angst:

You watched helplessly as the whole forest erupted in flames, the orange tendrils lciking up the sides of the trees, dangerously close to your reddened face

“What was going?” you thought desperately “How did I get here?” Everything was destroyed, every object turning to ash before you...you had to get out...but where was Todoroki?

You began running, flying through the charred leaves as the flames crackled around you

You didn't know where you were going, until you were met with a clearing, the once healthy grass now nothing but dirt and ash that was attacking your airways

A fierce battle was going on, it definitely being the source of the flames- both attackers were fire wielders, going at each other mercilessly- but one of the attackers was different-he was using ice as well

“Todoroki!” you tried to yell, unable to use your throat- it was like someone was choking you, making you unable to talk

You tried to move, to grab your boyfriend and escape, but- you couldn't move. None of your body parts working properly.

You stood there paralyzed, helpless to the situation, unable to move as you watched your boyfriend fight his father, Endeavor, no mercy being evident on either side

Panic flooded your system, only able to watch as the battle began to go in Endeavor's favor, your lover getting hurt more and more and more...

Todoroki rolled over, reaching out his hand to find the warmth of your body, confused to find that you weren’t beside him

He had at first groggily thought you had gotten up to go to get some water, only to look up and be shocked out of his sleepiness

You were floating a foot above the place you were sleeping, your body in the shape of a “T”

Your arms were limply spread out, away from your body, as your head lolled back as if someone was pulling the strands of your hair 

“Y/n!” he gasped, quickly pulling you back to the bed 

You face was contorted in such a look of pain, Todoroki then began to realize you must be having a nightmare

He began to shake you awake gingerly, calling you by your name and his pet names he had for you

You finally woke up, gasping loudly as if you had been drowning in water

You looked around, panting, not recognizing where you were at first, finally realizing you were in the strong arms of your boyfriend

“How did you-what happened-I” you asked confused, grasping his face between your hands and just relishing the feeling of his skin, his scar, his hair, terrified this was a dream and your nightmare was real

“You were having a nightmare,” Todoroki stated, placing a hand above the one you had on his cheek, “but youre okay, I got you now. Youre safe.”

-----------------------

Requests open!!!!

#bnha #bnha hc #bnha x reader #bnha reader insert #deku x reader #deku hc #bnha deku x reader #izuku x reader #deku #izuku midoriya x reader #izuku hc #bnha izuku x reader #mha izuku x reader #midoriya x reader #todoroki x reader #shouto x reader #todorki x reader #mha todoroki x reader #todoroki shouto #todoroki x you #mha todoroki #todoroki x y/n #shouto x y/n

[kimnjss]

wait pause 😔🤚🏻

jungkook (ignoring the multiple girls) is actually sweet.. obviously bc its arya, but he really do be looking out for his own friends.. him going out his way to do what he feels is best for his friends, even though he knows he shouldnt insert himself into every problem the couple has (i kno he always does it bc he likes to push their buttons sometimes cause hes a lil shit but he knows when to draw the line) he may be a fuckboi but he just really wants his friends to be happy 🥺 when he thinks he doesnt deserve the same for himself 😔

jungkook saying “doesnt want to go thru the shit arya n joon go thru” when arya asked him when he was gonna have a serious relationship kinda felt like a half truth.. idk he might be like kinda hot!hoseok in this case.. living in the moment type of thing and is in no rush to be in a serious relationship and if it happens, it happens. however rn his feelings are directed towards a girl who is his friend and is already taken by his other friend, so he’s creating as much distance as possible. and the it-was-actually-one-drunk-person-and-the-other-sober-drunken kiss didnt help his situation..

idk why but i feel like jk, joon and hoseok are similar when it comes to their feelings/emotions.. dont get me wrong, they are very affectionate, physically and vocally.. but all three live inside their heads for too long..

jungkook isnt being honest with himself, when he does realise something about himself and his feelings, he dismisses it and blocks it off, and distracts himself until he forgets about it and then it comes back, rinse and repeat.. namjoon isnt communicating with arya properly (neither is she but im like comparing the boys rn LOL) and when he does start showing emotion, its really passive-aggressive (??), its almost like he’s saying something but he isnt saying anything at the same time?? did that make any sense 🤡 idk sometimes its like he expects arya to read his mind and vice versa.. (ALSO not them going back to making out as if nothing happened.. they better have talked 😀👊🏻) but they do love each other, its the communication thats 🥴

and hoseok, if that last part was anything to go by 😬, but whatever he is thinking about to create boundaries to address the co-dependency from his side (dialling it down maybe??), he better be careful bc yn isnt stupid and she picked up on mood change quickly, he’s gotta communicate with her or else it aint gonna be easy in the long run.. yn isnt a mind reader and if he wants things to go smoothly like the past few months have been, he has to speak up and make yn understand how he feels from his pov.. he really be thinking about his feelings about yn and pleasuring yn at the same time.. king of multi-tasking??

(have i connected any dots yet 😳 i swear im getting rusty AJDBAJEBSKAJ)

okay also its either i read thru this chapter quickly or my eyes are playing tricks but i swear this is one of the quicker party fucks LMAOO 😳 although it makes sense cause there’s still a party going on downstairs LMAO but not like its stopped others before 💀 but also hoseok was kinda getting overwhelmed with his feelings/thinking there so..

whew its been a while since ive written something this long 🧍🏻‍♀️idek what ive said anymore -🤼‍♀️

PHEW THIS WAS SO LONG I’M JUMPING !!

okay !! first ., jeongguk has a lot going on the inside ., but when it gets down to it - he’s a really great guy . like his bedroom habits aside . he’s always honest nd clear abt what he’s looking for . he plays around ., but not in the ‘ruin my life’ type of way . his friends always come first to him . there aren’t any times where he has left them hanging nd them being happy correlates to him being happy . same when it comes to arya . his feelings for her are strong nd once he noticed that ., he set boundaries for himself bc of joon . he never crosses them . the only thing he wants for her is to be happy . 

it’s a mixture of both really . he’s not miserable . he enjoys having a line of girls nd meeting new people nd doing his thing . he’s young nd thats how he has his fun . buut if the right girl were to come around - he would not be against settling down nd being in a serious relationship with her . buut the right girl for him right now is already the right girl for someone else - who happens to be his best friend ., so there’s really nothing else he can do . so he buckles down into his hoe life . 

yesss! you got it exactlyyy . they are the exact same when it comes to how they handle their emotions nd all the stuff relating . lmao they’re best friends for a reason . 

the main thing that jeongguk keeps to himself is his true feelings . like on the surface he’s this cool guy that doesn’t care nd has girls knocking down his door nd he’s just out there enjoying himself - not getting attached . nd he’s so into that lifestyle nd focused on making sure that’s who he is perceived as that he ignores everything else that doesn’t fit . not to say he’s not himself ,. jeongguk is himself all the time - his feelings just tend to take a backseat (especially the ones he has for arya bc of how much damage it could do) . // joon definitely wants arya to know what bothers him without properly communicating anything . that comes from the fact that they’ve been together for ten months so he expects her to just know what will make him mad . nd when she doesn’t get it he gets pissy . (they both do that btw) but what they don’t realize that they’ll never go anywhere if they don’t just talk things out . (no they did not have a conversation before making up they just missed each other too much)

his biggest issue is that he’s in his head too much . he’s freaking while realizing that he’s falling in love with her nd that he doesn’t really like being away from her (he’s also extremely dramatic ., it’s not as co-dependent as he thinks) but bc in he’s confused himself when it comes to his feelings for her - he’s more inclined to just shut down nd figure things out on his own . buut that’s not going to fly when it comes to yn ., she’s not the type to take the no communication nd wait around for him to get his life together . even if he doesn’t know what he’s trying to figure out - she’d want that to be told to her so she doesn’t overthink . 

- their smut scene was a little quickie upstairs since they were in yoongi’s room nd the party was going on downstairs still . but hoseok was so deep in his thoughts that it made it seem faster ., he was so overwhelmed with his feelings that being wth yn was like at the back of his mind... (he still did a great job tho so props lmao)

#🤼‍♀️ anon #asks; 💔 #hoseok sm au #asks; kez 🍯

[reservethesun]

im sorry i couldn't not jump on the opportunity can we pretty please get forth beam with like hurt/comfort. idk forth doing normal engineering things aka gets into a fight for honor and doc beam to the rescue

Ahh thank you for your prompt! I love ForthBeam so much. T_T I feel very rusty with writing rn and I don’t know how good this is going to be, but here you go. Not a whole lot of actual like... traditional hurt/comfort but more Forth finding comfort in being around Beam and things being normal between them.

Word Count: 1658

Forth groaned as he tried to sit up fully, using the wall behind him to prop himself up. He wasn’t sure how he got to that point. He’d only stepped in to try to help and he’d thought that he had the upper hand. Until suddenly he didn’t - but at least the kid he’d stepped in for had run off. Forth would count that as a win, even if he was pretty sure that he looked a mess and that he wasn’t going to be moving normally for a while. Forth let out a small, almost bitter laugh - Beam was going to murder him.

Speaking of Beam, it seemed just thinking about him did wonders because his phone started to play Beam’s ringtone. Forth thought about letting it go to voicemail while getting himself to the hospital to get looked over, but then he was sure that would only make it worse when Beam found out he’d gotten hurt and hadn’t said anything. “I was just thinking about you,” Forth greeted as he answered the call, doing his best to not let the pain he felt obvious in his voice.

“Where are you at? You were supposed to be here ages ago,” replied Beam. He sounded a little distracted - he was probably studying while waiting for Forth to show up so they could grab dinner like they had planned. 

The sound of a page being turned on Beam’s side of the call reinforced Forth’s assumption. “Ah. Just hanging around,” Forth said, trying not to wince. He exhaled slowly, shifting the phone so that he didn't breathe directly into the speaker. He shifted wrong in his attempt to get up and was unable to mask the involuntary sound that escaped him, making it very clear that he wasn't as okay as he seemed. 

“What did you do this time?” Beam sighed heavily and Forth could easily picture him pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Look. There was this kid and I-”

“Where are you?”

Forth hesitated. He was sure that Beam was intending to come find him, if only to scold him for being impulsive and reckless again. “On campus. I’ll be there soon.”

“Where on campus?”

Forth could hear the sounds of Beam closing his textbook and things being shuffled around - probably him searching for his wallet and keys. “I’m fine. I’ll be there soon. You stay there and keep your pretty nose in that book.”

“Uh-huh. If you’re so fine then why are you still there and not already on your way here?”

Forth faltered at that question. He had no good answer because Beam was right. If Forth really was as fine as he was saying, he would’ve already stood up and started to make his way to Beam’s dorm. Yet he still sat there, vaguely sure that the only reason he was able to sit up like he was was because the wall was behind him if the way his side was hurting was any indication. He guessed the guy had kicked him after he’d fallen. Forth couldn’t really remember. It had all been a big blur, as fights tended to be. At least in his experience. He didn’t think he hit his head besides the fist that hit his face a couple of times. But it was fine. Forth got in several hits of his own - his knuckles were bruising to prove it. “I’m fine. I’ll be there soon. But, uh… could you make sure you have some ice?”

“Forth.” Beam said his name more as an exasperated sigh than a real word. It made Forth wince which hurt more than he would have liked. His face was probably turning pretty colors.

With a groan, Forth used the wall behind him to brace himself and stand up. Doing so left him a little out of breath but he was able to stand on his own and the world didn’t spin around him like it did the last time he’d been in a similar situation. “I’m up. I’m moving. It’s good. I’m fine.”

“What do you mean you’re up?” Beam snapped.

Forth gave a short, airy chuckle in response. “I just mean that I’m okay - just a bit banged up. I’ve had worse.”

“That doesn’t make it okay. You said-”

“Was I supposed to let that guy keep wailing on that kid?” Forth could hear the slight click of Beam’s teeth from how quickly and hard he closed his mouth at the question. They both knew that Forth wouldn’t do that. “That’s what I thought. Now. I’ll be there soon. If you promise to be nice and tend my wounds for me.” Beam didn’t answer, just sighed heavily through his nose but Forth took that to be a confirmation and he promised to see Beam soon before he ended the phone call.

If he was limping a little when he walked, well he was just glad there was no one around to prove it.

It didn’t take him too long to make his way to Beam’s dorm. Honestly, trying to navigate himself up the stairs took longer because his side hurt to a point that it was difficult to breathe after several steps up. None of his ribs felt out of place, though, so he was sure that it was just strain and bruising. He was also aware that he was probably just being a baby and that none of it was anywhere near as bad as he felt it was right then - his pride was probably more injured than he actually was, but damn that guy could throw a punch.

Forth knocked on the door to Beam’s apartment once he reached it and it opened almost immediately after. Beam must have been waiting by the door for him to show up. Beam reached out and grabbed his chin, directing Forth to turn his head this way and that to inspect the bruises forming on his face. “I know I’m pretty but are you going to keep me out here all night?” asked Forth. He smiled when Beam huffed out a breath but let go of his face and moved aside. “Promise it’s not that bad. Just some bruising to my face, hand, and side. You’ve seen me worse.”

“That doesn’t make it okay,” Beam replied. He gestured for Forth to go sit down on the couch before disappearing into his bathroom so that he could grab his first aid kit. He returned to the other room and sat down on the couch. Neither one of them said anything as Beam used a cotton swab to put some antibacterial ointment on a small cut Forth had on his face. Forth wasn’t sure if it was from being hit or from when he fell. There were no other cuts or anything, which they both took to be a good thing. Just some swelling and bruising.

Beam activated the instant ice pack in the kit and wrapped it loosely in a thin towel before placing it on top of Forth’s knuckles on the hand he had used to punch the guy he fought with. “Hold it there,” Beam instructed.

“Thank you, Doctor Beam,” said Forth with a smile.

Beam struggled not to smile in return, fighting against the upward twitch in the corners of his mouth as he cleared his throat. “Anything else?”

“I love you?” Forth’s smile took on a more cheeky nature when Beam just sighed and rolled his eyes before gathering up the kit to return it to the bathroom. Forth didn’t mention his side hurting because he was sure it was nothing. It was all nothing in the grand scheme of things. 

After he put up the kit, Beam returned to the couch. Forth immediately shifted closer to him and leaned against his side. Beam seemed to struggle with himself for a few seconds before he lifted his arm and wrapped it around Forth’s shoulders, letting Forth shift even closer to his side. “You know, for someone who hurt me far worse than this guy did yo-” Forth started to tease Beam, chuckling when his boyfriend interrupted him.

“That was an accident!” he insisted. It truly had been an accident, they both knew it. Beam would never purposely hurt Forth. 

“Well. Just keep it in mind that you did more than just a black eye next time you get mad at me for defending someone.”

“I’m not mad that you defended someone.” That wasn’t why he was always obviously annoyed that Forth had gotten into another fight. There was always a good reason for the fight, he knew that. Forth didn’t go around picking fights just to pick fights. Still, he didn’t like seeing Forth hurt.

“Mn. But you are mad.”

Beam sighed inaudibly and hugged Forth a little closer, to the point that Forth was practically on his lap at that point and he rested his head on Beam’s shoulder as he got comfortable where they were. Beam wasn’t mad. He knew it seemed like he was, but he wasn’t. He was just… worried. And he didn’t like seeing Forth hurt. Beam found it easier to show anger than concern. Even if there was always that tinge of concern on the edge of everything he did and said. Forth knew him well enough to know that by that point in time, but it didn’t stop Forth from poking at the obviously angry actions and tone of voice. “Let’s watch something instead of sitting here with you being all frowny and glaring at the wall,” Forth suggested.

“I am not-” Beam sighed when Forth reached up to place a hand to his lips to shush him, letting the ice pack fall to the floor.

“Shh. I’m hurt. Let me choose what we watch.”

“Ai’Forth!”

Forth smiled with a laugh as Beam removed his arm from around his shoulders, but Beam didn’t move away and let Forth set his head on his shoulder again. 

#forthbeam #2moons #2moons 2 #fic prompt #ask #anon #prompt fill

[intothewilde]

⌠ ellie bamber, 20, cis female, she/her ⌡ welcome back to gallagher academy, GIORGIA WILDE! according to their records, they’re a FIRST year, specializing in UNDECIDED; and they DID NOT go to a spy prep high school. when i see them walking around in the halls, i usually see a flash of (first edition books, walking in the rain, candy-scented lip gloss, getting lost in a museum, millions of twinkling city lights). when it’s the (sagittarius)’s birthday on 12/13/1999, they always request their CHERRY PIE from the school’s chefs. looks like they’re well on their way to graduation. 

she can’t do shit with knives yet but it’s a great gif, don’t @ me) but DO like this if you want me to hit you up for plots

@gallagherintro​

tw: implied neglect, brief mentions of mental illness and addiction

ok! so giorgia was born and raised in new york city. both of her parents came from extremely wealthy families. her mother was a french socialite and her father was the golden boy of a hearst-like (founders/owners of a distinguished publishing conglomerate) family from connecticut. some of his family members claimed to be descendants of one of oscar wilde’s cousins (a rumor that has yet to be confirmed) and he believed he had it in him to become a literary great himself. he seemingly succeeded, having published multiple best sellers popular with young pseudo-intellectuals. 

giorgia was never sure if her mother had wanted a daughter or a life-size doll. from a very young age she was primed to fit into high society and paraded around her parent’s lavish parties. most of her time was spent with nannies and violin tutors, studying her father’s poetic heroes, and dancing ballet. she was taught how to socialize with society’s elite, but she never felt comfortable doing so. she felt safer hiding behind her mother or sitting beneath the stairs with her nose in a book.

while her mother wanted her child to be pretty and proper, her father wanted someone to continue his family’s legacy. she learned to read when she was four, and by the time she was five, gio was forced to write in a diary every. single. day. (over the last fifteen years she’s filled up dozens of notebooks that live on a bookshelf in her childhood bedroom). she didn’t particularly like her father and she didn’t want to want what he wanted for her. (did that sentence make sense? i hope so). but she did like to write and she was damn good at it. her poetry was published in online journals and lit mags, her short stories won young artist awards. on the outside, she was everything her parents wanted.

but like i said before, gio struggled with the social part or being a socialite, and the life of an heiress was never something she wanted. she didn’t seem to have the right attitude - she was demure and diffident, a textbook wallflower. she was never happier than when she was reading a book or roaming a museum, always curious about the world around her. she never misbehaved or did anything wrong, but her parents wanted her to behave differently. 

their tribeca penthouse always had a certain cold air to it and the high ceilings only seemed to add to the lonely feeling that gio couldn’t escape. her relationship with her parents seemed to become more strained with each passing day. the more she learned about them the more gio realized she didn’t know them at all - the spa retreats her mother went on were really trips to psychiatric facilities and rehabs, and the endless slew of young women her father employed as assistants were all lazily hidden affairs. they never talked about it, if she tried to she was shut down or ignored entirely.

gio grew up wanting to go to nyu. she didn’t know where the dream came from (her parents wanted her to go to vassar or dartmouth) but she loved her home city and something about nyu had always called to her. she was accepted early admission to the gallatin school where she planned to major in an individualized study of creative and dramatic writing.

she loved her freshman year of college. she was finally out of her parents’ home and into a postage stamp of an apartment with an eccentric girl studying theater. she was around people from all over the world and all walks of life instead of the tiny bubble of rich snobs and private schools. she was around people she actually had things in common with. she was still shy and she still found it extremely difficult to talk to people. the easiest way for her to interact with people was to overcompensate for her shyness and be excessively friendly. when she was actually able to talk, she found she had many things to say, and once she started talking it was hard for her to stop.

her roommate was a big fan of movie marathons (in october they watched all of the scream movies, and then all of the saw movies, and then all of the children of the corn movies. that’s twenty horror movies. gio still has nightmares from them). for a few weeks in the fall she had a spy movie marathon. mission: impossible and jason bourne movies, mostly. something about them piqued gio’s interest, and she started reading spy novels, which quickly turned into her writing one of her own. she wanted the protagonist to be a woman for once, and one who’s main personality trait wasn’t tits. her novel, at dawn beneath the bridge of sighs, followed a cia operative and an italia aisi agent who are forced to work together to find the kidnapped daughter of an american diplomat along with the priceless jewelry she was wearing at the time of her capture. (do i know what the fuck im talking about? no!!) 

gio comes from a family of publishers so it was fairly easy for her to find someone who wanted to publish it, but the nepotism ended there, the success was all her own. it was lauded as an impressive debut novel and critics praised her subversion of genre tropes and inventive action sequences. but it stuck out to a select few for a different reason - the heroine used tactics uncannily similar to those used by actual spies, and she used them well. some people were curious as to how the character would handle other situations in the spy world, or really how the author would plan it.

so yeah she got a letter from gallagher, and she thought it was a joke at first. she eventually figured out it was very real (how? idk!) and her curiosity got the better of her. she decided it would be good for research, and that she could go back to nyu if she wanted to. once she arrived at gallagher, giorgia... did not know what to do. she had never been so out of her element, and she felt like she was terrible at everything. but that wasn’t really true, all the things you could study for were things she was actually learning. she became determined to actually do well, and as her first year comes to an end, gio still feels extremely unsure of herself, and unsure of where she wants to focus her studies, but she’s starting to feel like gallagher is the right place for her to be.

personality: she’s very sweet, very earnest, sometimes has a tendency to retreat into herself and get quiet, but she still combats her shyness with an outgoing attitude she learned from her mother that takes her far out of her comfort zone. basically as outgoing as an introvert can be. she tries to see the best in everyone and every situation. emphasis on tries, because she’s a total worrier and is often pulled between the desire to find a silver lining and the fear that something horrible will happen. she will give people more chances than they deserve and let them walk all over her. her self esteem can be pretty low, but one thing she is confident about is her writing (although she won’t tell you because she doesn’t want to seem boastful). art and literature in all forms are her favorite things and she could talk about it forever. she’s the kind of person who tries to learn everyone’s names and once she knows it she’ll say hi to you every time she sees you.

other stuff: she’s fluent in french and english and grew up speaking them equally. (she also knows some spanish, italian, german, and russian from her nannies, but she’s not fluent). she has a deep love for photography, usually bringing a camera with her at all times. she can play classic violin and piano, but hasn’t in a while and is probably rusty, she continued to dance until she came to gallagher and no longer had time to practice. she has a cat named pierre (named after pierre-auguste renoir). she's a vegetarian. she’s basically addicted to fruit. she listens to a lot of sad pop music. her favorite colors are blush pink and forest green. she watches a lot jean-luc godard and wes anderson movies. she’s kind of a sad girl/art ho. she gets crushes on people easily and all the time. she is very impressionable, and seems to experience heartbreak often. she just wants someone to lover her for her, you know? 

wanted connections: (im super fucking tired so im just gonna write some really basic shit but hopefully i’ll edit it tomorrow).

a best friend: it’s not easy for her to make friends but i want gio to have one person she can truly be herself around. a platonic soulmate, if you will.

friends: really just anyone who is understanding of how she’s not always comfortable talking but will also listen if she starts ranting about queer representation in 20th century poetry and plays, ya feel?

big brother/big sister: because she hated being an only child and she really needs someone looking out for her

bad influence: its not hard to be a bad influence on her but someones gotta do it!

good influence: someone who lets her baby ways rub off on them

idk what to call this but a sort of mutual respect with someone she’s had a class with?

idk what to call this either but someone she really clashes with, they just don’t understand each other

people she knew in nyc: she was there for the first 19 years of her life so if your character was there in early 2019 or any time before that, they could’ve run into each other

someone from a similar background who she can just be like... felt with?

hookups/flings: she loves love but love does not love her

an ex: could be good or bad terms idk 

crushes, mutual or unrequited

give me literally anything, the more angst the better!!

#gallagher:intro #it's 2:48 am if this makes no sense or has a million typos please forgive me

[lizord-lord]

The Sides As Quotes From Discord

these ones are old lol and remy’s here too

Roman: *puts hand up to friends forehead as if taking temperature* I diagnose you with Gay.

Roman: NO KITCHEN IS SAFE FROM MY WRATH

Virgil: someone keeps leaving their socks in the lifeguarding hut and if they do it one more time i’m going to unravel the socks thread by thread

Virgil: It represents how I feel inside Patton: Why are you screaming inside stop that

Remy: press D for disrespects Roman: F for fuck You Deceit: L for lies Logan: W for what the fuck Patton: C is for cuddles

Patton: am I the only one who eats three meals in this house? Virgil: yes Logan: yes Roman: yes

Roman: Roses are red violets are red everything is red, I have spilled paint

Virgil: costco has big dick energy

Remy: people are hard to recognize naked

Virgil: I shall now enjoy the free sample of death

Virgil: yeet Virgil: the window Virgil: out of the window Patton: no Virgil: yeet shoes Patton: no Virgil: yeet air Patton: ...how? Virgil: breathe yeetingly Virgil: breathingly yeet Virgil: beeathingly yeetinyly breathe yeet

Patton, placing an eraser on Logan’s head: Beans Logan: Please stop being like this

Virgil: Having a fucking distilled water icon mother fucking jumpscare me in the middle of my fucking story like a FNAF game or some shit is the weirdest fucking thing to happen to me but it was also fucking terrifying why the fuck do I still have Thomas with a fucking water bottle icon because "ha distilled water is neutral and Thomas is neutral" well ha ain't that fucking funny the mother fucking water bottles are coming for my soul now and it's all my fucking fault FUCK YOU DISTILLED WATER WHAT THE FUCK

Roman: There are two kinds of people. The ones that get some sleep and the ones that get fucked

Virgil: You want what cellphone. WHAT?! The fucking charger's D?!

Patton: Except slugs don’t eat meat, they’d probably just curl up and cry.

Roman: i still feel kinda cute but like DIE

Roman: I CANT BE GAY PAST WORKING HOURS

Virgil over voice call: You're our hostage now! Roman also over voice call:You shall never escape our wra- Patton: Sorry guys, I need to go to Walmart! Virgil: Um sir, our hostage left to go to Walmart

Logan: Hey Roman, wanna see something? Roman: ...Okay? Logan: Say something that you don’t like. Like, something bad that’s happening Roman: Uh...I have to go to work today? Logan: Oh, that’s sad. Hey Siri...play Despacito Virgil: *bursts out of room* WhO tAuGhT yOu ThAt-

Virgil: I don't sleep. I try a free sample of death

Roman: do you ever just make a silly decision but then something else happens and it's like no turning back like you decide not to turn on the bathroom light and that's fine but then you close the door and realize it's now pitch black and you could just turn on the light but no, I made this choice and I shall piss in the dark

Patton:BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACCCCCCCCCCCCOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN

Roman: You went from smut to angst in 1 shower

Logan: fear my sound mind and face of lenny

Remy: the alien ritual for mating is: 1. Procure object of affection 2. Kill any opposition- assert dominance in any way possible 3. Create nest for mate, bring them to it for them to reject or accept a. if rejected, tear nest apart and try again b. if accepted- copulate Roman: 'throw a tantrum' is an alien step to courting, man, i might have alien game

Virgil: Worm Logan: What?? Virgil: WORM Logan: WHAT DOES THAT MEAN Virgil: worm :) Logan: WHAT THE FUCK VIRGIL

Logan: we are just future deceased people. Roman: you cant prove im not immortal.

Virgil: whenever someone asks for salt I'm scared I'll be thrown across the table

Roman: yes we did discuss how people would come for our blood, and we would perch on our thrones, sip tea, and laugh

Roman: DAMMIT DISCORD MY FILES ARE NOT 'TOO POWERFUL' YOU'RE JUST W E A K

Logan: go take your bass-ackwards, narrow minded, unimaginative thinking somewhere deep into the pits of your own asshole and get the fuck outta my face.

Patton: IM GONNA MAIL MYSELF TO YOUR HOME AND JUMP OUT LIKE A FUCKING STRIPPER FROM A CAKE, BUT IT WILL BE A BOX AND ILL BE HOLDING A RUSTY PIPE

Roman: Perfect. I'll be a glittery, deadly tornado of indiscriminate strikes.

Virgil: you absolute douche canoe

Patton: Didn't you say your doctor told you to cut down on the coffee? Virgil: We're still in single digits at 3pm. That is 'cutting down' for me.

Patton: Are you okay Virgil? I haven't heard you play MCR in a while so I wanted to make sure you're still doing well

Virgil: what are cishets, is that some new vegetable Roman: Idk I’m still not convinced that my cishet friend isn’t actually just a bunch of velociraptors in a trench coat

Patton: I've been calling baby ducks the wrong thing for my entire 21 years of existence..... I have always called them quacklings

Virgil: also: Deceit, I have a present for you! I really think you'll like it! Virgil: It's a rocketship Virgil: now go to the sun

Patton: THESE GUYS NEED TO FUCK OFF!! Logan: that is not a subjective statement. However *throws a bunch of studies on child separation in your face* THIS IS AN OBJECTIVE FUCK OFF!"

Roman: I may be a mess but I can't look like one

(who said what under the cut)

Fae @theshipqueenarrives

Airam (no tumblr)

Nat @plan-with-a-pan

Yuthika @supremestoverlord Yuthika’s dad

Jensen @purediscordhell Allana (no tumblr) Jensen Nat Hela @why-things-go-boom

Allana’s brother Allana Allana’s sister Allana’s mom

Fae

Me

Elena @impatentpending

Ierin @ierindoodles

Dev (yeet) @deverick-racoma Dee (anti-yeet) @nirascharacterdump

Sparrow @poisonedapples Sparrow’s brother

Sparrow

Ierin

Ierin

My mom

Me

Yuthika

Fae’s friend Fae’s other friend Fae Fae’s friend

Sparrow’s dad Sparrow’s mom Sparrow’s dad Sparrow’s mom Sparrow’s dad Sparrow

Ierin

Me

Dee

Me

Me

Jack @patton-croc-agenda Me

Liz @pinkeasteregg Liz’s friend (not tumblr or gay)

Ezra @starry-eyed-haiku-dreamer Ezra’s friend

Ierin

Me

Em

Tori @typical-torii

Tori

Tori

Em @em-be-lievable Em’s friend Em

Mason’s stepdad (mason has a tumblr but I can never find what it is)

Me Em

Avery @the-incedible-sulk

Me

Me (as patton and logan)

Nat

#discord schenanigans #roman sanders #patton sanders #logan sanders #virgil sanders #ts remy #ts deceit #we're weird people ok #these are old #i've had them saved for a while #finally got around to it

[survivormanhattanbeach]

Episode 1: “...too early to be shady?”-Ryan

There....are so many men and I'm overwhelmed. Also Keaton shading me during his intro is a whole ass mood 

I’m so excited to be playing with majority of this cast... too early to be shady? 

Oooooooofffff what the hell did I just get myself into. Julian’s here. He always finds some fucking way i swear to god... and then there’s Keaton who i pissed off in a prior BB game... which literally ended like 3 days ago for me.... and then i ahve Andreas form Kuang Si and Billy from IdlM.... what the fuck is wrong with my life right now I mean...... i’ll figure this out, let me stop having a heart attack right now

I am SO OVERWHELMED right now! All these messages from people that I think hate me, this is going to be fun! As of right now I'm most nervous about Sarah because I LOVE talking to her, she's so easy to talk to but we always do each other wrong and have never made it far together in anything SO yeah. I'm really hoping that I get on a tribe where I connect with a majority and/or two of them don't like each other so I'm not the first to go! I guess it's time to now... go and be social haha! 

When did talking to people become so hard??? Idk if it's because I've been away kind of for awhile and not talking to people but I feel like I'm the most boring person in the world AHHH. Hopefully things get better soon. I'm about to ignore that annoying red number two by the skype icon and play the game for a bit to maybe give me something to talk about with these people!! 

http://atleastyoumadejury.tumblr.com/post/182902334923 That’s me in this challenge. 

First night = first opinions! Let's go. -called isaac immediately to form a bond with him. He seems super stoked to have me in the season and we agreed to form a f2 deal. Honestly he is funny, adorable and iconic so I am not mad if I go to f2 with him. I will be loyal to him as long as I know he is loyal to me -mark is very social and I know he uses this to his advantage. Every cute thing he is saying, he is definitely saying to the other players -I can easily bond with basically everyone on this season so I feel like this is going somewhere. I can tell ppl are liking me so honestly I am fucking excited to play --went on a one world call with ryan, tom, madison, dani, isaac and myself and they are cool af. I know ryan and tom used to work together from the beginning of mykonos so I am kinda scared they are a definite power duo. Tom has already proven to be a good player in terms of strength and I can tell hes strategic. I REALLY REALLY WANT TO BE HIS #1 SO I WILL WORK ON IT. fuck I need to get on his good side to get far. i can tell. I just dont want him to screw me over - Junior is playing and I guess he is the shadiest person in the game? SO I will be on the lookout for that. -Ruthie needs to leave. -Keaton hates madison so I can use that to my advantage somehow ? well see. -I am going to continue to talk and be social but honestly I dont want to give away too much. Im back after a year so I hope I can go far this time. Fingers crossed

I’ve smelled some fake shit before, but nothing quite as fake as Ryan trying to squash the beef with me. I’m flutter my lashes and play stupid for a while, but in all honesty, I want him gone as early as possible. I don’t trust him, at all. Also, Dan is sneaky as fuck. So I don’t trust him either. Plus I’ve hosted him and I know he’s only in it for himself. He’s vote himself out if it meant he’d win the game. But then there’s Mark, who has played with and been burned by both Ryan and Dan. Between the three of them I’m just not feeling him. I don’t want to be his demise, but I wouldn’t be sad to use him to kill the other two then dump him before he gets farther than me. Kill three birds with Mark’s stone. As for y’all hosts, thanks for dumping me with Madison, Joey and Keaton. Who will keep me around just as a number. They think I’m stupid and I have no idea what I’m doing. Same goes with Brandon. Like I love “OH MY GOD HEWWO”ing my friends. Another main, another season where I’ll just do whatever I can to make it far. Here’s to a good season. 

VL Confessional: This is my greatest chance to FINALLY make an impact on Tumblr Survivor. The minute I was casted, my ranking average went up. What I want to do this season is to take advantage of the time that I have. I want to do well, I want to finally prove how good I CAN be. This is my opportunity to bond with a ton of other players, and I’m READY FOR IT. My mood rn: https://youtu.be/roJ5NSfmxvs

I feel like this game is lowkey a test of Madison and I’s relationship...

VL CONFESSIONAL I’m sitting here on my couch watching the TV They’re picking all the numbers of my favorite lottery I am so excited when fortune calls I’ve never been so happy with someone picking my balls.

Oh god, I shouldn't write any of those weird and unsettling oneliners that I have in mind right now, so.... Hello! Just hello! I'm back for another Tumblr Survivor fun time and I have no idea what to expect from myself for this season. Will I have motivation? HELL YEAH! Will I have the time to back it up? NOPE!!! So... let's start with a little cast assessment, shall we? I already know that I am lucky to have LUCY around, because I know her from another community. That being said, she is a great player, so if she is active this time around, she'll definitely make it further than last time... So far though, it doesn't look like that... :sadface: I am also THRILLED to see RUTHIE playing. I love her, and we only got to play once (in a BB game that ended after 2 weeks) and I happy to see her and I really hope we can work together this season!!! I have mixed feelings about MARK and BRANDAN rn, because I've played in TS with them previously. I pissed off Brandan a lot in Kuang Si when I told him that I wanted him out. I hope he's gotten over that, but I feel like he's not the type of person to forget. But I think he'll be willing to give playing with me another try, but he'll keep me on a short leash. Mark, I voted off in Flops, and then I flipped him to vote for me in the worst FTC of TS history. But the guy is strongheaded and idk how well I can work with that. I've had great conversations with TOM and KEVIN and I feel like they're people I can talk to a lot more, and maybe build a relationship with. I had some decent chats with SARAH, DANIELLE, ISAAC and MADISON. I can't place them yet, but I think I can get along with them. I got off the wrong foot with ISAIAH and RYAN a little, but they seem fun and I can see myself working with them in the future. Or maybe I am just imagining things here? Who knows.... KEATON, JOEY and BILLY, I tried talking to, but I am really not sure yet if we're on the same wavelength. But they seem active enough and open, and it's not even been a day yet. ;) JUNIOR, DAN, JAKE and JULIAN, I haven't spoken with at all so far. rip? --- Let me tell you that I really like it being 4 Tribes of 5 to start the season off (at least that's what it looks like). I don't care too much about being a top-placing player here. I don't think I'd be immediately at the bottom right off the bat, so I don't need that unneccessary potential challenge threat target right away. I think I've spoken to enough people and got a little bit of that Andreas personality across, so I at least have a foot in peoples doors, you know? Let's see how things shake up! I am confident for starters, but that's the point of it, isn't it?

I’ve only talked game with a few people which kinda scares me. I also think a lot of this cast has previous relationships and I only know like 2 people. I love Isaac, Jake, Ryan, and Mark. I need to start socializing more.

hellurrrrr we're back and better than ever! first tumblr org since like... July so I'm feeling pretty rusty. Thankfully I have a couple familiar faces in this cast so I'm not too nervous. I was pretty excited to see Dani cast... we literally went to middle school together LOL. I want to keep that a secret, but Joey already knows because Dani has her location set to my city UGH. So now I gotta hope that Joey doesn't blow that cover. I know Kevin from Zwooper but idk how loyal he actually will be to me. I know Dan, Ruthie, Isaac and Madison from previous games but I don't think we worked well together in them so whoops. RYAN is here which I'm excited for. I want to work with him, he seems sweet. I also know Sarah because she made Eddie cry so I already love ha. But Eddie told me she's crazy in games so maybe I should tread carefull with her for now. I think everyone else is a fresh face to me? So this should be interesting. Half of them haven't even added me yet though so they need to step their pussies up. I'm here to win since that's the only placement I could get that will beat my last placement LOL. But I'm not trying to let an ORG make me go cray cray like Crossroads did... but it probably will <3

Ok, so. This whole picking tribes thing, has just got to go. I have multiple people telling me they are putting me first and although I love being first for once, this might not be the best thing for my game. If a random person I haven’t played with picks me, that looks shady. If one of my MANY previous allies picks me, that looks shady. Oh and there’s that thing where Billy and I squashed beef, and hopefully that can stay because I don’t need a giant target on my back for billy being my only enemy in all of the games I’ve ever played. If this tribe swap is 4 tribes of 5 then I need to make sure my people pick wisely and make sure that they have the 3 they need to keep a majority. The only issue with that, is I’m essentially in the middle of 5 groups: Mykonos, Bermuda, Unova (Pacific Island), Guyana, and then anyone I haven’t played. Take the union of those sets and you have the entire cast Manhattan Beach (yes I did just use math language, no I am not ashamed).

Imma make Jake think im his bitch. “Oh Jake, ill vote out my best friend, and someone who I respect as a host to boost your ego!”

Alright, Day 1 is nearing its end and I've made some progress I feel? So to get right to it: I've spoken a bunch with Danielle and Kevin and they've spoken a lot with each other too, so we're trying to get together on a tribe of 3. The plan right now is to hopefully get one of us in the top 4 (me), I pick Kevin, Kevin picks Danielle, and we've got an easy majority if it's tribes of 5. Now, we don't know if we actually split up in 4 of 5, or 2 of 10, or 4 of 5 but we have Tribal Councils with 2 tribes together. It's impossible to call right now. As a small addition to my first confessional, some final cast assessments: JUNIOR: A very friendly guy. I feel like he's genuine, but he's definitely VERY friendly, and I am not used to that level of friendliness in TS. But I think we good rn DAN: We spoke about Germany and that's about it. We have a little basis. JAKE: We spoke a little about politics, so at least we spoke and have a basis. Not much more than that. JULIAN: Dude... you seem so nice, but you are giving off no confidence in yourself. I don't have much more to say than that right now. I fear that he'll be used as a number by someone rn --- I got some good chats with KEATON and ISAAC going. And that's about it! I hope that I get put on a tribe with KEVIN, DANI, LUCY, RUTHIE, TOM, KEATON... and maybe SARAH. Just bring on the tribes, so I can finally start playing this game. One World is too big for me.

I'm pretty confident with my score for this challenge, I think it's enough to at least show my future tribe that I can do my part in the challenges, and hopefully I get somewhat of a say in who will be on my tribe. For my social game, I'm definitely planning to use me being the first boot on Guyana to my advantage. I've heard from Andreas and checked a bit as well that there's some fierce competition in this cast, and I think I can slide by for quite a while as long as I make some good connections. I know Dani, Andreas and Ryan from outside of this season, and those will be some people I could rely on from the beginning (not sure about Ryan though for that one since we don't know each other that well). Also I don't know what it is about Ruthie, but she seems so sweet and I'd love to get to work with her further down the line.

I love my tribe so much! It is PERFECT! Literally they are all people that I've talked to since the game started and I don't have any issues with any of them. I'm really glad especially that Andreas is on my team and I think that all in all we will have a strong tribe going forward! I don't want to get too cocky but I do feel confident in my position on this tribe! Nowwww if only we can win and stay away from tribal council! 

Honestly, what is wrong with me? Another main season and it's One World? Negative. This is how I will die. I would rather eat glass than have to fucking message 25 people I don't care about. On another note, I love my tribe high key. Aesthetically, we're a really great looking tribe. We could all be models tbh. We all get along really well so if we go to tribal, I'll probably just tell everyone to vote me out, for my mental health and theirs hahahaha save them the trouble. Nah, jk I'll fight, but I don't want to think about like voting any of them out? I def feel closest to Mark, but I really enjoy Dani and Ryan's banter. Junior is so cute too ugh haha. I'm just happy I'm not with the other ugly asses on other tribes

ugh i hate doing these things but im gonna try and be better if i flop this season im deleting skype tbh. This cast is going to give me a solid chance to go deep i feel like. Ryan Billy Dan all want to be my F2, madison is close with me, dani and sarah have both expressed interest in going deep together tribes were picked and holy frick is this tribe incredible. Ryan and Dan and Dani all were in my top 5 of who i wanted to be in a tribe with and junior is actually dope as fuck. i just hope we dont lose and have to vote someone out. especially the first round bc junior is safe so id have to decide between dan dani and ryan and id probably self vote if that was the case

So now I’m like 200% not even gonna try to work with Mark or Dan or Ryan. They’re all on the same tribe. Which means they’re gonna make a final three and that’s something I don’t want to be anywhere near. That’s a dumpster fire that I do not want to be a part of. What sucks even more is, Mark told me I was number one of his list. But Dan was picked by him before I was. So clearly he lied to me. But to add insult to injury, I was picked last for a tribe. So I was literally no one’s number 1. So that sucks, a lot. I guess that’s a fun way to start the season. “Way to go! No one likes you enough to be your #1!” Always a bridesmaid, never the bride. It just makes me have the “anyone but me” mindset even more than I already have. 

Hello new tribe. I am content with the outcome. On one hand, it sucks that I ended in 5th or 6th place, but on the other hand, the draft was rather revealing. I planned to pick KEVIN while he picks DANI, but Dani is soo fucking popular, that she was the absolute first pick - and then she picked Ryan over both Kevin and I. That definitely alerts me, but oh well, I don't blame her or anyone, she's lovely. I am happy that I wasn't the last pick of my tribe, because that would have sucked a lot. Instead, I get to be around BRANDAN, who I actually want to work together with for the time being. RUTHIE picked me, which I am really grateful for, but there is no guaranteed to know how far up I actually was on her list, but at least 6 others were behind me. Now I picked LUCY. Which is a good thing. She rocks at challenges. But she's definitely on the bottom of the totem pole here. I would prefer to vote out JULIAN first if we ever go to TC as this tribe, but for that, Ruthie needs to like Lucy more than the guy who picked her... Either way, let's win challenges somehow and not worry about that. The people I care for should be okay..? Dani will be safe. JUNIOR will be safe by default. Orange tribe will be fun to watch, because I care about everyone but BILLY on there (sorry honey). I am actually scared for my #1 Kevin rn, because JOEY and MADISON are together, which is scary, and neither of them picked him... So he could go first :( Either way, I need to stay on Brandans good side and I need to build up a strong bond with Ruthie, so I can keep Lucy around...

VL CONFESSIONAL HOLY MOTHER OF GOD NVGHHYGCSZAAAWSDDXF I’M SAFEEEEEEEEEE. I’m honestly so happy about it. I gave it my all and I’m honestly shook. And then I realized Madison and I are on the same tribe... Welcome to the plotline of the season.

I have the moral backbone of a chocolate eclair

VL CONFESSIONAL So yeah for this challenge [email protected] is taken. Fun.

I'm not really sure how I stand with my tribe. Currently my main connection is Andreas, but I know I can't just rely on him. He was picked before I was and he could easily just let me go if I'm in the way of him getting to the first tribe swap. We seem to be doing well in the challenge, and I hope we do win. I personally at least kind of feel like the outsider, and I don't know the connections the others have with one another, so hopefully this gives me time to build a connection with them before we go to tribal.

alright so first off, fuck y’all for giving us this challenge. you’re gonna make me sit here all day reblogging a post because i’m competitive, but we’re probably going to lose because my tribe sucks. like i was the only one doing it for 2 hours. kill me. let’s talk about my tribe real quick. i think kevin is genuinely with me with is good. but when i got put on this tribe, dan messaged me saying that joey, madison, and isaiah are a friend group. i knew that joey and madison were “dating”, but the isaiah thing worries me because if it’s true, then um they have the majority. i’m trying to stay close with joey too since we played zwooper together before. i just really need to bank that him and Kevin would stick with me over the others if we go to tribal. um but i wish i was on a tribe with my same city sister, dani, or with Ryan. let me just say something about Ryan... yo why he gotta do me like this? when i saw ryan in this cast i thought omg that’s the cute ryan but he probably won’t pay me much attention... flash forward to last night when we ditched the main call to call one on one and basically called all night. ummm, are we about to have a survivor showmance? probably not, boys like to ghost me all the time so i don’t expect much but that boy is about to have me WHIPPED i just know it. anyways let’s hope i don’t lose the first challenge because i literally ALWAYS go to tribal first in orgs 

YAY! My tribe pulled out a win. I wish we would have gotten an idol clue but a win is a win and I will take it!! In all honesty it seems like Brandan, Andreas and I did all the work, but maybe Julian and Lucy did things too and just weren't... vocal about it. Lucy has talked to me one on one a bit but I don't know if she knows what she's doing haha. As for Julian, I really like him but he's been SO quiet, not talking in the tribe chat and not being very talkative via PM so we'll see. Right now I feel the closest with Brandan and Andreas and I hope that the three of us can maybe form some kind of alliance. I really hope that Kevin and Jake will be safe! I like Madison and Isasiah (I spent five minutes trying to remember how to spell that name and I still can't get it GRR) but I haven't talked to them as much as the others. I guess we'll see what happens haha! 

so julian can talk in the one world but not our tribe chat... interesting... although i can't talk. i BARELY ever talk in the one world aSLFJLSF

Well we came in first for the first challenge! I tried sooooo hard and I have never reblogged so much in my entire life. The tribe that came in last has two of my allies on it and I’m pretty sure they are in the minority. Madison, joey, and isiah have an alliance apparently. But Jake did tell me that Joey came to him and wanted to get Isaiah out. I really hope he isn’t fucking with him because I need Jake and Kevin to stay in the game!! So far I really love my tribe. I wouldn’t even know who to get rid of if it came down to it. I think Dans the least person I’ve talked to on my tribe. I should probably keep talking to people who aren’t on my tribe aside from jake/Kevin/Tom/Sarah. And I should probably start talking strategy but I like where I am so far social wise. 

My tribe is so fucking united it’s scary. We all just gel really well and literally called for an obscene amount of time this weekend. I really love Dani, we haven’t connected too much in pms yet, but she gives off such good vibes. I feel like she’s definitely a social threat, but maybe by aligning with her she can bring up my social game a little. I desperately need to talk to more than just my tribe mates, but honestly the only other person who attempts to talk to me is Tom, and he’s just kind of forward and weird. Like he asked to share idol clues and I was like....okay sis out of the blue. Idk just seems kinda shady. Pennekamp, or as I like to call them Pasta tribe, losing is honestly my kink. I really hope that someone from the friend group goes home, but honestly it might be Jake or Kevin going. Madison and Joey are for sure an alliance bc of hos22, and then I know Isaiah is friends with Madison bc she was talking about him on call one day in another game, so. Let’s hope one of them flips and one of those 3 gets the damn boot. 

Being on the Robinson Riptides tribe is lit af. Why? Mark and I are on the same tribe, so I have my number one, and then Dani picked me and I know she is a close ally as well. Plus now that we won the first challenge, Junior does not have immunity in the next round and in the event we go to tribal next round, he would be my first target on our tribe. I like Dan, but def not someone I want to take deep in the game, seems like a large threat. Who knows, could easily use him for a number. Also, I love Tom. I am so happy he is back with me in this game after playing in Mykonos. I don't think people understand how close we are, and I want to down play that as much as possible. He is my secret go to persona and I'm going to keep that hush hush for now. We are trying to get our sides to merge into an alliance while the one world business is still going on. Goal: Tom gets Sarah to want to make a chat with either myself, Dani, or Mark. And if this happens, then we have five people with great connections outside but also people I would want to work with for this portion of the game. Also, WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK WAS THIS IDOL CLUE BEING USELESS AF? CAN SOMEONE EXPLAIN? LIKE ACTUALLY EXPLAIN? HOW IS THIS CLUE SUPPOSE TO HELP ME? CUZ IT DOES NOT!

Yay, Immunity. The Pacific Panthers are so boring as a tribe. The chat is dead. Is it because of timezones? Is it because of age diversity? This tribe has it all! Lucy is still new to TS, Ruthie is busy most of the time when I'm around. Brandan and I don't mean too well rn.... And Julian? He is wearing Harry Potter's Cloak of Invisibility! Either way, I hope Kevin survives F20 TC, as he is a valuable pawn and friend to me already. I'd expect Isaiah to go here, even if Madison might be the smartest move, but it's too early for big moves I feel. See ya next round!

Okay this game is NOT back to basics Johnny, it's back to hell. Schoolyard pick tribes, messy players, ONE WORLD, it's just an absolute cluster truck. I'm doing well for myself though. Getting 4th gave me the opportunity to set myself up well with Sarah and getting lucky with Billy should make me safe on this small tribe for awhile. How I'm not happy to see Madison here though. I'm afraid there's going to be a gun pointed at me by her the entire time, so I'm thinking I'll be forced to go after her before anyone else when given the opportunity. I just have to keep conversation high, keep game level talk at a medium, and eventually get taken out by an idol/twist

https://youtu.be/wpsiisk5lQQ

So big surprise, I'm going to tribal first. Joey is getting on my nerves idk why he even signs up for these games if he's always working but anyways. He's safe so I have to play the role of the devoted housewife to save face. As of now the vote is on Isaiah which sucks because he is definitely an ally for me, but at the end of the day our tribe and the game in general needs strength and commitment. Ugh why must my tribe be so iconic. 

OK SOOOOOOO Basically my paranoid ass has convinced myself I’m going home already, but let me walk you through why SO Isaiah is just super inactive, not to the point where he is NEVER here but just considerably less when comparing him to myself or others and so me jake Madison and joey all talked among ourselves and in various 1 on 1 and came to the conclusion we are voting him out, ALLEGEDLY! but ever since this tribe started the rumor of Madison Joey and Isaiah being friends has been brought up SO many times so that is just engrained in my head, now I’m probably over thinking this part but it makes sense to me, if Isaiah purposefully was being less responsive to provoke the instinct in me and Jake to vote him out, perhaps he has an idol or perhaps he is just fine being the decoy vote among the three and it helps that friend group manage the votes if they know who/how we are voting and it makes me and jake feel “safe” which could lead to the not playing of an idol SHOULD either of us have one and get suspicious. THEN after we have this “set” plan I guess Isaiah told Madison that he was voting for Jake, and Madison told him to continue the lie of being open and honest to the 2 of us so we don’t suspect anything, now if he WERE voting Jake and Jake had an idol I think he’d be impulsive and paranoid (like me) enough to play it and THEN those 3 would in all actuality be voting me, leaving me defenseless and alone, flushing Jakes non-existent idol (it exists theoretically though) and then I go home first boot 3-2. So yeah I don’t feel good but I’ll never feel good I also just scarfed down from chick fil a and now I have to poop. Anyways I will be casting my vote was Isaiah later tonight because that is the only move I can make and pray that my show watching, self loathing attitude has made such a positive impact on Madison and Joey that they want to keep me around ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

apparently isaiah wants to vote me out after being inactive for 2 days... bitch suck my taint. everyone else says they're voting isaiah so umm fingers crossed?? a bitch is nervous af regardless bc i will cry if i flop and get 20th

[asexualzoro]

list of reasons I find zoro ridiculous

after my similarly titled mihawk post took off I decided to make a zoro post, since he’s my second favorite character and also arguably the most ridiculous character in all of One Piece. here we go

- I know what you’re all thinking. i’m gonna open this list with how he wields three swords, right? no. no, Zoro has done so much ridiculous bullshit, this doesn’t even seem weird anymore. i don’t even bat my eye at this. this is nothing. now that i’ve got that out of the way, let’s begin

- this dude has like, an obsession with cutting off his own limbs? and MAYBE i can understand trying to cut his feet off when they were stuck in wax—you’re trying to save your friends, i get it—but what about when he was sword shopping in loguetown? who’s first response when buying a cursed sword and testing if it’s really cursed is “i’ll toss it in the air n see if I get amputated lol.” plus there’s that old filler where luffy gets his finger stuck in a bottle and, when he asks zoro for help getting it out, zoro tries to CUT IT OFF. im convinced he lost that left eye of his bc he got dust or something in it and then tried to stab it out

- there’s like, several occasions where Zoro has been directed to head up a staircase and gone some other direction. it happened in enies lobby and in dressrosa? like, what’s the dude got against stai—... oh, wait

- his reintroduction post timeskip. get on the wrong boat? just cut it in half! who even cares! how’d you even end up on the wrong boat? you had to walk towards that boat, which means looking at the boat. that boat looked nothing like the sunny, wouldn’t zoro have noticed that? he also has to make an effort to climb on, which means, you guessed it, looking at the boat! he probably sees the crew members, maybe even gets helped up by one or a few. how did he not at any point in time notice that wasn’t his boat?

- also when they landed on sabaody the first time and zoro was like “i’m gonna go take a walk!” and both Sanji and Usopp tried to stop him, talking to him like concerned parents of a troublemaking toddler, like “Zoro you can’t go out there you’ll get lost!” to which Zoro replies “yeah but the grottos are numbered, I can find my way back if I just remember the number!” and Sanji and Usopp are like “okay, solid logic, even YOURE not dumb enough to mess that up” and what does Zoro do? what does he fucking do?

- I want to emphasize he messes it up because a bubble covers the 4 in “Grotto 41” so he thinks it’s grotto 1. BUBBLES. ARE. TRANSPARENT

- “sorry, I don’t pray to god” fuckin edgelord

- Zoro’s epithet is “Pirate Hunter” and it’s super lame. he could’ve been “Demon of the East Blue” but they went with pirate hunter, even though he became a pirate. even Chopper’s is better than his lbr

- THERES A SCENE WHERE SANJI THREATENS TO PUT RAZOR BLADES IN ZOROS FOOD N ZOROS LIKE “do it u won’t” SO SANJI DOES AND ZORO JUST EATS THEM? ODA EVEN GOT ASKED ABOUT IT IN AN SBS AND CONFIRMED YES, ZORO DID IN FACT EAT RAZOR BLADES. THIS 2EDGY4U BITCH JUST. STRAIGHT UP. ATE RAZOR BLADES

- in film gold he wears that black jacket under the white one. mind you he had no way of knowing he would be trapped in gold by tesoro or that they’d all have a dramatic coordinated outfit change once he was free so what the fuck was he doing? why did he wear that? who wears two jackets for no reason?

- “if i’m gonna be a statue I want it to be in this pose” “i’m glad I struck a pose”

- remember when zoro fought mr. 1 in alabasta and mr. 1 dropped a stone building on him and he was just like “this is a rocky day” or smth equally awful? i hate him

- the tarzan yell in skypiea

- actually, the goggles too.

- didn’t he try to convince someone he was fighting they were sunglasses bc they had some blinding light-based attack? I feel like he did but I don’t remember skypiea well enough to be sure

- Zoro vs the bird in skypiea. spent a fair amount of the damn arc running around skypiea getting messed w by a bird (which, according to Luffy, was more evolved than Zoro bc it had developed a sense of direction. burned by ur own captain)

- when asked why Zoro was able to speak with a sword in his mouth, oda said “IT’S HIS HEART SPEAKING”

- that colorspread Zoro where he reads a book about weightlifting while balancing a weight on top

- when Zoro fights that masochist guy in film gold (I think his name was dice?) and said some cocky ass one liner after the guy fell unconscious that went something like “What's wrong? Didn't it feel good? Aren't you gonna scream in pleasure?" awful

- Zoro almost gets murdered by Mihawk and then, later that day, tries to take on fishmen underwater. others r like “you cannot handle this, you will literally die” and Zoro doesn’t even care bc Luffy is in trouble

- he was sailing bc he left home to find mihawk and then couldn’t figure out how to get back

- remember that filler where Zoro taught Luffy how to skate but then forgot to teach him how to turn. I love both that this happened and the implication that Zoro is a person who knows how to roller skate and therefore has spent time roller skating. Zoro roller skating backstory when?

- when Zoro was fighting oz, a 500 year old corpse, he licked his sword. now, on top of licking his sword being ridiculous as hell because, listen, there’s NOTHING cool about licking your sword. you just look like a loser. but a sword that just came out of a 500 year old corpse? really? i know it was preserved by the cold and all but there’s no way it didn’t rot at all. that’s a rotted, frozen corpse. Zoro what in the HELL were you thinking. I hope you get sick

- i’m sure it probably wasn’t even the first time he licked his sword in a fight but I will say with absolute confidence he looked like a loser every single time

- I feel like he licked his sword while facing mr 1 but I can’t remember. if he did, that’s honestly iconic. stare down a dude that’s made of swords while licking yours? power move. only decent time to kick your sword

- Zoro, joining Luffy: “if you stand in the way of my dream i’ll kill you!” Zoro, a day later: “of course i’ll carry my captain in this heavy cage on my back to safety. oh this gaping wound in my side? nothing. who cares about bleeding to death, my captain needs me!”

- all those big weights he’s got. all of them.

- especially that time he was lifting weights post thriller bark after barely surviving kuma, still heavily injuries, complaining about how weak he is. buddy...

- that time in drum island where he decided to train by going swimming in the freezing ice-country water, then when he got out he got lost in the snowy mountains until he wandered into a random battle and took out some guy just to steal his coat

- this isn’t the only time he steals some random dude’s coat

- the chimney.

- that filler in smiles lobby where he gets, like, abducted by a bunch of children for a day and integrated into their family?

- Roronoa Zoro went fursuiting in dressrosa and that’s a canon fact you all must acknowledge

- speaking of being a furry anyone remember mugiwara theater?

- THE FUCKING MUGIWARA THEATER NAMES. mugiwara theater is a gift, alright? here’s some: nakamura hanzorou. zobear. ZOROMILK

- I FORGOT TO MENTION. THAT TIME ZORO N USOPP WERE HANDCUFFED TOGETHER AND ZORO TRIED TO CONVINCE USOPP TO PLAY ROCK PAPER SCISSORS WITH HIM TO SEE WHICH ONE OF THEM WOULD HAVE TO CUT THEIR HAND OFF

- also the fact that his logic was “it’ll be fine cuz chopper can just sew it back on”

- can we also talk abt how later that fight he uses Usopp as a sword because holy shit Zoro

- this isn’t technically zoro’s fault but the guy who sold him his sword to him in loguetown has a giant version of bounty image up above his bath, which........

- barto asked for zoro’s autograph and Zoro just wrote “sword”

- the grave of the rumbar pirates was finished right around when Zoro woke up from his coma post thriller bark and Zoro decided to walk over while Brook is sitting there mourning almost everyone he ever loved and just. plops his sword—an inanimate object—in the dirt by the grave of BROOKS ENTIRE CREW like “hey i’m gonna bury this here u don’t mind tho right? cool”

- he’s lucky Brook is such a cool dude cuz if I was mourning the death of MY crew and some fuck decided to plant a rusty sword there i’d just fuckin kill em

- in Zou they were talking abt whatever and Luffy mentioned how Sanji was as strong as one thousand men and Zoro, clearly jealous that Sanji got praised by Luffy, butt in with a stuttery objection on how HE was stronger than Sanji and worth TWO THOUSAND men, which luffy ignored, and Nami had to reassure him that yes, Zoro, we know you’re strong. toddler

- this is also not technically zoro’s fault but one time someone asked oda in an sbs which strawhats would eat ice in their drink and oda answered who would n wouldn’t (Luffy, Chopper, Brook, Usopp, and Robin would, if ur wondering). Zoro was on the wouldn’t list, and some fan sent oda a letter informing him of a panel where Zoro was shown eating ice to disprove this. someone pulled zoro ice eating receipts on oda and that’s a fact we all have to live with

- the first time Zoro meets mihawk—the strongest man in the world, the man he wants to defeat someday, and incredibly powerful and impressive dude—he cries like a baby

- zoro’s been crucified like 4 times now. once in his introduction than in three movies (6, gold, nebulandia). idk why this keeps happening but honestly? keep it up

- when Brook joined the crew, Zoro said he was sorry for Brooks bad luck as if one of the first things Brook ever saw Zoro do wasn’t to try and die for the crew via Giant Paw Ball of Pain

- speaking of, i’m pretty sure half the reason zoro DIDNT die in thriller bark is because if he died via smth as silly as a giant paw ball his injured pride would kill him again

- I was going to make fun of Zoro for wearing only a suit and a fake mustache in dressrosa as a disguise but then I realized, like, given how absolutely shredded Zoro was in Punk Hazard and how that suit somehow managed to squish it all down without zoro ripping the sleeves off? solid disguise

- when merry was burning and everyone’s bawling and remembering great memories on the ship and Zoro was standing there, 100% stoic, remembering a nap

- Zoro saw marines (Garp) coming to Water 7 while Luffy was still unconscious and ran off to warn the others but couldn’t find his way back to the hotel

- that G8 filler where he falls off a cliff in pursuit of his swords

- speaking of fillers, remember that amnesia one? (ha). highlights include Zoro trying to physically fight a small sea horse (plus Usopp doing a bad lip-syncing) and Zoro swimming through the Grand Line with his swords tied to his head by his bandana

- meets a dragon, eats the dragon

- it got mentioned once that Sanji and Nami canonly help Zoro and the other guys get dressed. so every time Zoro wears something absolutely ridiculous (which is often), it’s probably Sanjis doing

- “I can’t believe I cut a freaking booger!!”

- speaking of, remember that time Luffy flicked a booger into Zoro’s drink at the Baratie and Zoro tried to force him to drink it?? remember that?? I hate them both

- that time Zoro was trying to find the Right Eye in Skypiea, said that (though the path to get there was STRAIGHT AHEAD) all he had to do to find the right eye was just keep going right (even though that would just lead him in circles!). and then after that do you know what direction he went?? do you know?? he fucking went left

- the time Zoro got lost walking on a straight path in a filler.

- Zoro lost to a guy in a fight and just fucking let the dude cut him in half. like, yes, the baratie scene was all cool as all hell and I love it but Zoro did in fact basically invite a dude to cut him in half

- when they were hit by negative hollows and everyone else said stuff that was kinda funny but Zoro went straight up “I don’t deserve to exist” please honey talk to someone

- he was fighting Kaku and kept engaging in Kaku’s devil fruit bs and then berating himself for being uncool as if he wasn’t already fighting a giant giraffe

- to end this list, I want to get to Zoro’s absolute worst offense. remember when Zoro fought Kaku and he did that asura form thing? where he straight up grew four extra arms and two extra heads, all wielding swords? what the FUCK was that? and don’t tell me “fighting spirit” alright. that’s bull. people don’t just GROW EXTRA SWORD-WIELDING BODY PARTS because they’re just REALLY INTO a FIGHT. like I know this is One Piece and shit’s ridiculous all this time but this? this is too much. even for One Piece this is too much. this is so ridiculous. there has to be a line, even in One Piece, with what these guys are allowed to get away with. I can accept haki so good you can see the future. I can accept spinning so fast you set your leg on fire. I can accept being made of springs. I can accept booger bombs. I can accept all that and more, but this? this is where i take my stand. Roronoa Zoro cannot keep getting away with this! fighting spirit is just not an explanation. and the worst part? the absolute worst part?

- Zoro makes four extra limbs and two extra heads, all armed with swords, MATERIALIZE out of THIN AIR with absolutely NO REAL EXPLANATION and then pretty much NEVER DOES IT AGAIN! he did it once in sabaody (and once in strong world) and then hasn’t done it since! everyone else uses the power ups they got in enies lobby all the time but Zoro, somewhere out there, knows how fuckin sick this attack is (bc yeah it’s ridiculous as hell but like I still enjoy it) and he just won’t do it again. not once post timeskip has he used it at all. Roronoa Zoro knows what he’s doing and he is out there, right now, laughing

- roronoa zoro is one of my top three favorite one piece characters and I make this list entirely out of love. (feel free to add on more moments I may have missed and i’ll add them)

#One Piece #roronoa zoro #Zoro #im making a tag for these lists and it is: #ridiculous lists #I love this man. hes awful and I love him #I also want you all to know ive had this list in my notes for like a month and ive been adding to it this whole time #roronoa Zoro is a piece of work #my posts

[makknays]

nur du.

nur du; only you in German

“I don’t know what do at this point any more. I think we should break up; it would be for the better.”

“No, you’re not leaving me, not when there’s so many ways we could do this without a breakup.”

“I don’t think there is, I’m sorry, I love you but I can’t keep doing this to myself.”

genre: angst, romance

word count: 2k (1,999)

a/n: my german is rusty so idk if that’s correct i was torn between du/dich, lemme know if im wrong or right :)

Relationships are never easy, you could easily say they were my kind of thing. I’ll get ready for the next cliche, they won’t my thing until I met him, I started to believe in love because of him but I started to forget what it was like to be loved because of him as well. Jungkook was the man of my dreams, he was everything I wanted and more. However, he no longer had the time for me nor the patience.

“Listen, I know you’re a busy person but could you at least try to make time for me. I don’t want to be clingy but it’s been far too long since we’ve been on a date, do you know how long it’s been? It’s been six months.” you said to him but he paid you no attention. “Why am I even here? You tell me to come over, only to ignore me like you have been for the past few months; do you even know what’s been happening in my life?” you questioned him as you reached to grab your jacket, preparing to leave, only minutes after you arrived.

“Sure, I do. You act.” he monotonously replied to you, not even moving an inch from his position on the sofa. “Jungkook, I got the role in a KBS Drama, do you know how big of a deal that is? Of course, you don’t. You didn’t even know that I auditioned, did you?” you said, laughing in disbelief at the remains of your relationship. Silence. “I feel like I’m the only one fighting for us and it hurts, where have you been all this time? Your friends are more interested in me and you are; even when I got my role in the drama, they congratulated me, took me out to have a celebratory meal, and you didn’t. Do you understand how much that hurt me? You’re supposed to be my boyfriend not them.” you were on the verge of screaming but you internalised those emotions in order to not cause a scene.

“Why don’t you just date them? You seem to spend more time with them anyway.” “I don’t want them! I want you but you can’t even clear one day for me.” you shouted, this time holding back the tears that were threatening to flow out of your eyes. “Okay, when are you next free?” he asked, not a care in his voice. “Not for another five months, you would’ve known that if you had actually spoken to me. I have to fly out of the country for the drama.” you said, calming yourself down with the thought of being able to get away. “Then what am I supposed to do about this? I don’t have time, you don’t have time. What’s your solution?” he said, this time actually putting the effort in to face you.

“I don’t know what do at this point any more. I think we should break up; it would be for the better.” you suggested. “No, you’re not leaving me, not when there’s so many ways we could do this without a breakup.” he sternly replied. “I don’t think there is, I’m sorry, I love you but I can’t keep doing this to myself.”

A week later you were flying out of Seoul to Zurich. This is exactly what you needed and although it was for work, it was still a getaway for you. During the past week, Jungkook hadn’t even tried to contact you. You were seen of by Taehyung and Jimin instead of him and although it hurt slightly, the two of you were over and that was that. You just needed time to heal.

“I messed up.” the younger male said as he appeared in front of Yoongi’s house. “What are you doing here? Is everything alright? What did you mess up?” he worriedly asked the maknae but he stayed silent. “Look, come in. Why don’t we talk inside?” and Jungkook complied, walking straight to the living room. “What exactly did you mess up?” “She broke up with me. I messed up as her boyfriend and she’ll never come back for me.” he said, tears forming in his round eyes. “What made her break up with you?” “I had no time for her, I hadn’t been on a date with her in over 6 months and I knew nothing about her life; I had no idea she even auditioned for that drama…”

“Look, kid. Relationships, they’re not my thing. But I can tell you this. They’ll never be easy and you’ll go through alot together and individually but if she’s worth fighting for, you gotta keep going. Even if she doesn’t come back to you, at least you tried. I don’t wanna tell you that you were a shitty boyfriend or anything because everyone has a low point in their relationships, she just happened to be strong enough to let go to stop her own suffering.” “She said she loves me, so why did she leave?” “I’m telling you, she loved you enough to let you go.”

You found yourself constantly checking your phone to see if there was a new message from Jungkook. Nothing. Although you were the one who cut him off, you still wanted him to message you and talk to you, not completely blank you out from his life. Here, you had no one to talk to, not about this stuff at least. Even if you were close to your fellow actresses/actors, no one was close enough to comfort you.

While you were in your dressing room, an hour ahead of the shoot, you received a call. “Hello.” you answered absentmindedly, not caring enough to check who had called. “___, can you talk right now?”, it was Yoongi, not your best friend but he was close to you. “Yeah, what’s up? Everything okay back home?” “Well, for the most part but umm… Jungkook…” “What about him?” “He’s disappeared, he took his phone with him and just drove off somewhere. No one knows where he’s gone.” “What? Is he stupid? Why would he do that?” you asked, your shock causing the stylists to jump slightly, you bowed in apology. “I don’t know, the last time I spoke to him was about you.” “I, I just want him to be safe. Please do everything you can to find him, safely.”

You couldn’t believe your ears, was this boy out of his mind? Why would he just drive off and disappear on everyone like that. You tried to reach his phone but due to the fact that you were in another country you could only reach him if he also had wifi.

“I don’t know what kind of stunt you’re pulling but I want you to be safe and at home, Jungkook. I don’t want to lose you to a mistake you make.”

“…I’m sorry, I’m not going to be home for a while. I won’t make any stupid mistakes; I’m in Busan.”

“Jungkook, you can’t just run away from your life because one thing didn’t work out.”

“No, you can’t tell me that. Because that’s exactly what you did as well.”

“Regardless of what I did or didn’t do, you should’ve been better than me and stayed in Seoul. And I’m here to act not as a getaway, remember, I’m still working over here.”

“You don’t need to decide what I choose to do.”

The short-lived conversation frustrated you, your now ex-boyfriend was always the arrogant type but when you needed him to be sane, he wouldn’t be. You placed your phone on the table as you took a breath and sat down opposite your mirror to have your hair done. Not even 5 seconds after you took a breath, your phone rang. It was Yoongi, again. “He’s in Busan.” he sighed over the phone. “I heard. He better not do anything dumb.” you sighed, really wishing you could be home to figure this whole thing out. “Remember, he’s not a child. He hates being babied, so give him a chance to do things his way.” Yoongi was right, you always babied him, despite being the same age, it was always you telling him how to do things; it must have been a blow to his ego.

It had been almost a month since you’ve been in Zurich and since Jungkook fled to Busan. A month of silence, neither of you had messaged the other, in fear of saying something that would continue to hurt them or continue to fuel their anger. Today you were in a beautiful garden, rich greens and passionate colours surrounded you; you were filming the first kiss for your character and her counterpart. It was weird not kissing someone you loved, you still weren’t used to the whole feeling but it was your job. You ventured into the garden before the shoot started and found yourself staring at every other flower; however, your favourite was a simple hybrid tea rose, it was bold, passionate and a symbol of love. Love. Something you had but hadn’t been returned to you, or so you felt. Your character was being loved but that didn’t suffice, it was nowhere near the love you needed in your relationship.

You wandered around the beautiful setting again after the shoot, many other people were also there, admiring the beauty that nature had managed to produce. As you strolled around the blissful garden you found yourself being drawn towards the same rose as before; you had no idea why but it intrigued you in various ways. Right when you reappeared by the rose bush, a familiar hand reached out to brush the delicate petals. You turned slightly to look at the owner of the hand and it was none other than Jungkook.

“Fancy seeing you here.” he smiled as he tucked his hands into his jacket pocket, why he was even wearing a jacket in the warmth of Swiss summer puzzled you. “Why are you here? I thought you were in Busan.” you told him, your eyes still fixed on the soft-looking rose. “I was and then I needed out so I came here, not realising you were here since you didn’t mention where you would be when we fought.” he chuckled. “Seriously, what were the odds of this?”

“Why did you just get up and leave?” you asked him, finally giving into looking into his beautiful brown eyes. “I was hurt by what you had said; it was a real wake up call but you had already made your decision to leave and nothing I could say or do would probably sway you.” he told you as he remembered the events. “You told me that you still love me but you didn’t let me speak about my feelings before you left.”

“I was a mess, I was leaving the country soon after and I was tired of being hurt. You were so cold and I didn’t know why.” you told him, recalling the way he acted around you. “I admit I was cold, I was annoying but I have nothing to justify it; the stress I felt I just pushed onto you without considering your feelings and I understand that you wanted out but I just wish I could go back and prevent it from blowing up.” he told you truthfully, removing his hands from his pockets to hold your own, causing you to look down and stare at the way they perfectly fit. “You need to know that I love you and didn’t stop for this past month, being without you hurt and I realised how bad of a boyfriend I was recently; I need to make it up to you and give you months of dates back. It’s only ever been you for me.” His last statement caused a smile to spread across your face and you looked up at him, his eyes sparkled like stars in the night sky, “Why not start?”

#jungkook fanfic #jungkook #bts jungkook #jungkook scenarios #jungkook angst #jungkook fanfiction #bts #bts fanfic #bts fanfiction #bts angst #bts scenarios #bangtan #bangtan fanfic #bangtan boys #bangtan scenarios #bangtan au #bangtan angst #bangtan fanfiction #kpop #kpop angst #kpop scenarios #kpop fanfic #kpop fanfiction

[littlehungrywarrior]

there’s a lot of things about me that are fucking absurd and really cool, so when ppl ask me to tell them about myself, i break em out immediately (”my family heirloom is a severed head named oswald,” “I can see disney studios from my house,” etc) 

but just bc im bored and I feel like it, here’s some stuff about me that I dont think I’ve ever really talked about? not secrets, but just...mundane things that I don’t really ever say in favor of Ice Breaker™-type things 

I have a profound respect for mail services. When I was 7-8 years old, we watched a documentary in class about how the postal system works, its history, and about the various jobs involved. It was an extremely formative experience for me. I don’t send a lot of things over snailmail and so I’m not really sure how to express my respect and support but it’s definitely there. Unfortunately, I’ve yet to play the FallOut game where you’re a mail carrier, but I wanna... I wanna. 

Though I’ll claim to the ends of the earth that sports confuse me, I am a huge speed-running enthusiast. One hobby/interest/self-esteem exercise I have is that I really like to learn jargon/lingo involved with...anything, really. So I started watching speedruns to pick up the lingo and I just...became infatuated. I’m no expert but I’m %100 into it for more than the lingo at this point; I’ve long since got that covered. One of my favorite parts is golf-clapping along with other fans when something cool/impressive happens. 

I can’t sleep without a hat on. A beanie, specifically. When I was, like...5 or something, I was terrified of vampires, and for some reason I thought vampires bit the skull and not the neck. So I pulled my blankets up over my head at night. My parents thought this was dangerous (I might suffocate) so they gave me a hat to protect myself with. I’ve long since outgrown my fear of vampires (and learnt that they don’t typically bite skulls) but I’ve associated hats with nighttime safety for so long that I can’t fall asleep without one. In the event that I don’t have one, I can wear underwear on my head to suffice...and I think I wore a stuffed animal once somehow but idk. 

I’ve had my SPiN in genetics for so long that 5-year-old me used to infodump strangers at the grocery store. When I asked where babies come from, my dad got me a picture book written for kids specifically to answer that question. We still have it; my brothers used it, too. It starts by explaining pollination and then extends the same concepts to dogs and then humans. Most of the information is on pregnancy and fetuses rather than sex, and cell development immediately caught my fascination. I asked my parents for more information about this and they gave me some more microbiology stuff. Combine that with my animal obsession + budding interest in heredity and you’ve got a tiny obnoxious geneticist who wouldn’t stop telling random people in line at the grocery store about how chromosomes are passed on through haploid cells. Dad got real smug about it, it was fantastic. 

On a similar note (and I have no memory of how this actually happened), I more or less learnt to read spontaneously? All at once? Again, I have no clear memory of this until the part where I can read... My parents read to me every night but I never was able to do it myself. I had a huge library built into the wall at perfect me-height for reading. One morning, the summer I turned 5, I (according to legend) walked up to my parents, got their attention, said “I’m going to read now,” and then (this part I do remember) sat down and read every single book in that library over the course of two or three days. Super rough estimate, but it was somewhere between 70-200 books, with a variety of target ages ranging from 3 to 10-11. No chapter books, all pictures, but the second I was finished I wanted more books. My mom took me to the store to buy more and insisted I get a chapter book since I’d burnt through the picture books so fast. And that’s where I got my first Warriors book. 

That was not the last time I read an entire library. In 7th grade, a friend of mine and I both had sex ed previously and so were allowed to skip that year’s sex ed on the condition that we spent that class in the school library. And together, we read the entire thing. Only what was on the shelves, though; nothing in the back. Actually, at one point on the last day, we’d already read every book in the place and we were bored, so we pulled some books out of the back to look at and none of them caught our interest. One of them was the first Hunger Games book WAY before it got popular. We’d never heard of it, both read the first 2 pages, didn’t like it at all, and put it back. You should’ve seen our faces when it suddenly blew up into a huge thing. The sad thing is, I remember a lot of books that I enjoyed but can’t find now because I can’t remember any specific titles or characters. We sped through everything to finish it all and didn’t really take a lot of time to absorb details so a lot of them are lost to the vague, hazy back of my memory. Still looking for that manga where the ninja kid...stops an evil scientist from...some kind of virtual world machine. There’s a piranha tank? And then the bad guy...gets sniped by a helicopter and falls off the roof, or something? Also there was a manga version of Maximum Ride, which I only remember by name because 2 chapters in it suddenly hit me that this was a comic version of a text-novel my mom was reading at the same time. I bought a handful of books from that library at the end of the year and still have them. 

I’ve only been in one play but something fucking sweet happened during production. I was Malvolio in Twelfth Night because, and I quote my drama teacher (who had known me for 8-ish years at that point and also who was smirking her ass off when she said this), “You’ll see why when you read the play.” She was not wrong and to this day that smug fuckin grin gives me life. Anyway, I was Malvolio, and you know that “Some have greatness thrust upon them” speech that everyone’s so inspired by? That speech is a fucking prank pulled on this asshole and it’s about bangin’. So the scene is that I dramatically read this “””love letter””” I’ve received and then run off to go embarrass myself. The speech is LONG and so I asked if I can just...actually have it written on the letter. And she said yes! So I wrote it down with intent of reading it off the letter. But opening night, the actress who was to place the letter grabbed the wrong paper and so I got just a blank sheet. Guess fucking what? We’d re-choreographed that scene so many times the night before that I slammed that shit anyway, word-for-fucking-word. And I was never mad at my friend for grabbing the wrong paper, so I say this in jest, but her punishment for grabbing the wrong paper is that the entire cast/production team did not hear the end of my pride for the entire week. For a timeframe reference, I was 12. 

When I was a kid I had a horse named Emmy. She was a rental horse. Actually, I think she was a pony? The way the rental worked was that she lived in a barn with a bunch of other horses. Her owners were a small business who gave riding lessons, but instead of just riding each session, one of the horses was “yours” (assigned by age, height, and temperament, not picked by the kid) to take care of while you were there and ride consistently every session. Essentially, she was only my pet when I was on the property. I can still ride but I’ve gotten rusty and I can’t do anything above a trot for more than a few seconds. Both times I’ve jumped have been accidents, once on Emmy and once on mom’s current horse, Meteor. I’ve fallen only once, and it was off Emmy. Mom’s going to be getting a gigantic thoroughbred soon and I’m both terrified and excited to ride this very large boy. 

I talk about this in person but not online because...why would it ever come up online?? I have worn the same style of red jacket every single time I leave the house since I was a pre-teen. It’s to the point where people will only recognize me if I’m wearing it. I had a friend in high school who was/is a really cool guy, we were seniors and we’d been close friends since freshman year. I had my jacket tied around my waist because of the heat. The school had two campuses a block apart and I was walking from one to the other to get something. Friend was walking from the other to the one, so we passed each other. Wordlessly. No wave, nothing. I was tired, it was hot, I didn’t really think anything of it. Then suddenly, a foot behind me, he freezes dead in his tracks and says my name with some kind of stricken shock. He had no idea it was me. At all. Keep in mind: my jacket? Tied around my waist. Not even off, just around my waist. Since then I’ve used this jacket thing to my advantage. Sparingly, I can take it off to sneak around. It’s like I’m invisible to people I know unless I say something and they hear my voice. It’s incredible. 

Going back to speed running, way before I knew that it was a thing at all, I taught myself to speedrun two games: The Lion King (PS2, not the impossibly hard one) and Putt Putt Saves The Zoo. As they were unofficial speedruns that I didn’t really call anything and just kinda did when I was bored, I never timed the latter, and I only timed the former once using my mom’s kitchen timer. It was a rough estimate since sometimes I paused and forgot to hit play for a few seconds, or I needed to pause but didn’t for a few seconds, and the timer only counted full minutes anyway, but I still remember the time: 35 minutes. I keep meaning to go back and re-teach myself to speedrun it, perhaps more professionally, and time it with more accuracy. I still remember all the strats but I can’t pull them off with as much fluidity as I could when I was still in practice. I also can, when watching both Lion King 1 and 2, still point out with frame-perfect accuracy exactly when a scene starts that was a cutscene in that game. 

wow writing this was fun and I kinda wanna do it again. ok 

#what do i tag this as #me?? #me

[jennilah]

HOO. yeah. I just finished Stranger Things

I super loved it

also i dont know where i had it in my head that it was gonna be this kind of cheerful adventure thing idk WHY but i really thought it was gonna be like.... about these kids who could jump through 80′s pop culture worlds like fucking ET n shit......... ???????????

i was so, so severely wrong

(I think it was the season 2 superbowl commercial where the kids are dressed as ghostbusters, and the hazmat suit folk in season 1, now that i think about it)

and the show was like a billion times more sad than i was expecting it to be. like, i was cryin not even two episodes in and throughout i kept cryin and that last episode i was a snotty, disgusting mess

anyway im really surprised how contained it was? obviously at the end they have a few little mysterious hint thingies that could possibly be answered in a second season but if they really wanted to end it there, they could?

the only thing that bothers me is poor Barbara and her disappearance wasnt made as big a deal like we never saw her family grieving or any mention of a funeral or something for her Im just gonna assume it all happened offscreen but its still really sad lmao 

yea holy shit what a crazy fuckin show

Every character was just wonderful but i applaud these kids, especially. the emotion and realness they brought was A+. They were a bunch of kids that actually felt like a bunch of kids. which sounds like it should be easy to do but so many shows get children so wrong. this one really gets how middle school aged kids really are

edit: ALSO I WANNA ADD: i also assumed the kids were gonna be the main, main characters of this whole thing, what with all the art and stuff people make of them. So it was a surprise to me that all of these other characters had just as much screen time and importance to the plot. and I LOVED them. the kids were great, but I loved the plots of every other character and the way it all came together at the end. awesome!!!

i wonder what season 2 will bring

I usually hate when people recommend me shows based on what shows I already like because im always like “im not looking for a show just like spn i already have spn for that!” but if you like the FEELING that season 1 of spn gives you, that classic rock, diner, dark and rusty, running in the woods of suburban towns where something creepy and mysterious and otherworldly is going on, then def check it out? just cause i know 99% of my followers follow for spn lol

#jennilargh #stranger things