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#bc it makes me really fucking good at pretending everything is perfect and alright with me
munceee-old-account · 2 years
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mfw im stuck in a catch-22 where the problems i need to see a therapist for are the same problems keeping me from seeing my therapist
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grippingbeskar · 2 years
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salt, ice and fire | frank castle
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chapter twelve - ray of sunshine
[series masterlist] [previous chapter]
frank castle x fem!reader
word count: 5.1k
warnings: canon typical violence, mentions of death, injuries, stitches, description of wounds/cuts, mention of scars, violence, gore, death, blood it gets kinda gross but ITS PUNISHER TIME AGAIN BITCHES. also kinda sad frank and reader but look we’re gonna be okay.
a/n: guysssss what do we think. tell me. i feel like i struggle to write good action scenes bc the ones in the punisher are so cinematic and bad ass but i’m trying. also don’t ask me if any of the sewerage system information is right i have no idea and i wasn’t about to google it bc gross i’m sorry lets pretend. hope u enjoy beauties.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
“Hold it tighter”
“Like this?” Your hands grip at his direction, and you hear his hum of approval.
“Now go slow.”
“That’s no fun.” You smirk up at him, but Frank is too lost in concentration to fight back.
“Slow, or this’ll finish before it’s even started.” His hand wrapped around yours and adjusted your grip. “There you go. Just like that.”
“This feels wrong.” Eyebrows furrowed, you see him shake his head in your peripheral vision. 
“You don’t think I would know if it was wrong?”
“Fine.”
“Alright. Now just...” He loses his words as you move through the motion he showed you again a few times, a low noise the only sound your doing something right. 
“I think I got it.”
“Now hard and fast. Don’t think, just do it.”
Letting go of the hilt of the knife, it slams into the opposite wall. Finally, after three days, you get it. Bullseye.
“I hit it! Holy fuck!” You shout, running up to wall. You almost want to take a photo of it.
“Damn right you did.” Frank claps once, and nods, a smile crossing his face. He looks proud of you. You turn around to face the wall again, losing your nerve.
It had been four whole days since you had first arrived at this run down garage-turned-vigilante-base, and four whole days since Frank had kissed you. Or touched you, really, of any kind, bare the minimum of whatever training he dragged you through that day.
It was a good distraction, his never ending supply of drills and routines to run you through. Not all were physical, like the first day he gave you scenarios to break down. He kept telling you how half the shit he did was just as much a mental game as it was physical. If you could put your opponent off, even for a second, you could control everything they did. Subtle changes in pace, in tone, could be the difference between life and death.
That stuff you weren’t so good at, but with your enhanced strength and speed, the physical training was becoming a breeze. Knives had nearly become second nature, spending hours staring down that stupid wall with a target that seemed to mock you, finally figuring out the subtle moves and changes you had to make to slam the blade true. Sure, it was distracting because all you could think of was what happened last time Frank showed you how to throw, but eventually you managed to work it out, thanks to him.
Guns, you were almost comfortable with. Frank was clearly superior, but that was about the only thing you couldn’t match him in now. You could throw a punch, but he showed you how to make them count, how to place them, and especially when not to punch, when to hold, move, duck and cover. Waiting was not your thing, but every day made you better at it.
“Do it again.” Frank stands to the side, watching as you gather up the three remaining knives. “It’s muscle memory, don’t think about it.”
You turn around, not facing the wall right away, and when you spin back you throw all three in succession, as fast as you can.
All land with a successful thud - right where you wanted them to. One is dead centre, the other two slightly above and below, creating the perfect straight line.
“Atta girl.” Frank says from the wall, and everything gets about ten degrees hotter. “We go tonight.”
“Yeah?” He nods, walking over to the array of guns he’s had laid out for a few hours, cleaning while correcting your form.
“They won’t expect it. You feeling okay?” He looks down towards where you were shot, and you pull up your shirt to show him.
“Feels fine.”
“Need to take the stitches out.” He says and starts to walk towards the bathroom. You had thought about that for a while, and you should probably learn to take care of your own injuries, but any excuse to have Frank that close again is one you wouldn’t fuck up.
You go inside the small excuse for a bathroom, and he kneels down in front of you. His fingers dance lightly around the wound, assessing, before he gets the little scissors out and starts to cut the wires.
“Were you a medic?” He shakes his head, and his hand fans out on your stomach, holding you still.
“Basic training runs you through first aid. That and getting my ass shot made me a fast learner.” You try not to laugh, and he looks up at you, catching your smile. “Curtis was.”
“Bomb guy, right?”
“Yeah.”
“I figured you served together. He - he seemed nice.” Another cut of wire, this one made you wince a little, the wound still healing despite the time.
“Best guy I know.” You swallow, trying to get your nerve back.
“You can tell me to piss off, when I ask this.”
“Go on.” His fingers dig into you a little more as you unconsciously squirm away from the blades.
“I was reading another article. One on The Punisher, on the computer.”
“You’re googling me?”
“You told me to research.”
“I meant the maps, not me.”
“Anyways-“ Another wince, and his thumb runs soothing lines along your skin. “They said you - there was someone that you served with, that knew about what was going to happen to your family. It wasn’t him, was it?”
“No.” His movements all but stop as he considers going on. There’s something about him fixing you up that seems to force the two of you to talk about things like this, a kind of intimate trust that encourages you to share a little more of yourself, which is why you got the courage to ask.
You had spent a lot of time on the computer the past few days, and since he had kissed you like a man starved, you had to admit your interest was a little bit piqued. There was no public information about what really happened to his family, and you had no hope figuring out how to use any of the systems on the monitors to find it yourself.
“Good. That’s good. He’s nice.” You were pretty sure it wasn’t Curtis, but the only other two names you could find that served with Frank was a photo of him, covered in mud with two guys next to him, their names labelled underneath.
Gunner Henderson.
Frank Castle.
Billy Russo.
“Is it gonna scar bad, or do I still have a chance to wear low rise jeans at some point?” You give him an out as he stands up, removing the last of the stitches.
“I think you’ll be just fine.” You go to leave the bathroom and give him some space, afraid your question went to close to prying, but his hand falls on your hip, holding you there. “What other names do you know?”
“What?”
“You said you did your research. Don’t get shy now, who else you got?” He was doing that thing again - the thing where you were almost positive he could read minds he was that good.
“A guy named Gunner. And Billy Russo.”
“Billy Russo was my best friend. Family. Spent more time with him than my god damn wife and kids. He was my brother.” You swallow, and wonder what happened to him. Surely it must have been Gunner, then. No one would sell out their brother.
“You don’t have to tell me.” You say softly, and he nods, like he knows, but he wants to tell you anyways.
“He hung around my kids. Knew ‘em, my wife fuckin’ loved him, too. She always had this massive heart, let him crash at our place, fed him. He’d help me out round the house. It was natural, you know? Having him around. On the last tour, he told me he was getting out, that he requested a transfer. Shit got dark over there, we weren’t just soldiers anymore.”
“Was this Kandahar?” You say from memory and he nods. Then he looks down at where his hand was resting on your hip.
“They called us the American Taliban, over there. We’d go in, dead of night, and make people disappear. The guys who ran us - Schoonover, Rawlins; they were selling drugs to fund the operation. Stuffing them into KIA’s and sending them home. Gunner, the other guy, he found out, tried to blow the whistle on the whole thing. He took a video of an interrogation we did, tortured this guy who was meant to be an American ally. He was innocent, we all knew it, but Gunner was the only one with the balls to do something about it. He sent it to Madani.”
“Jesus.”
“After that, everything went to shit. They thought I was gonna sell ‘em out for - money, to do the right thing or whatever I should of done. They wanted a distraction, bodies to bury their shit under. Billy knew.” His voice cracks at the end, and he still not looking up. “He knew what they were going to do, and he did nothin’. Let ‘em die like fuckin’ animals.”
Your hands go to his cheeks and pull him up to you. You don’t know if you should kiss him or hold him, so you just freeze there, his eyes burning a whole straight through you.
“Frank.”
“They were the best. My kids - Lisa was so smart. She was reading Moby Dick when she was ten.” He swallows hard again, and you feel his jaw clench under your hand. “And Frankie he - shit, he was just like me.”
“A ray of sunshine?” He laughs, and the smile that touches each of your thumbs on his face is one you would kill to see again.
“Maria was.” You could hear your own heart breaking at the way his voice got way too soft. “She was the best with ‘em. All that shit was my fault, and I-“
“Hey. Don’t do that.”
“How do you know what I was gonna say?” A little bit of life flows back into his face, and it makes your hands warm against his skin.
“Cause it’s exactly what I do.” He blows out a puff of air, and his hands fall from your hip. You let him go, letting him set this pace. “You wouldn’t have known.”
“It’s been years, and I still think of ‘em every day. What I could of done.”
“Me too.” He still hasn’t stepped away. “I should of moved faster. Told my Dad to take those stupid fucking letters he got seriously. Told my mum not to lock the door so I could of got out quicker - helped them, maybe, I don’t know.”
“You were a kid.”
“Doesn’t matter, though. I could of been 30 years old and it would still have happened. And I miss them every day. Still will, even when I’m as old as you are.” You shove him a little on the shoulder and he shakes his head, smiling small. “I shouldn’t have asked. I’m sorry.”
“Stop apologising.” You shrug, looking away. You feel his hand back on your hip, and the other one hooks a finger under your chin. Your breath hitches. Even though you’ve been sleeping in the same bed for the past four nights, it’s the closest you’ve been since he kissed you.“You uh- You should get your shit together. We might not come back here.”
With that, he takes a few steps back then walks out of the bathroom.
He’s right. Always is. You were going in tonight, and if your brother was being held in the same place as the doctors family, this would be it. Agent Madani would come in, make sure he’s safe, and you would probably never see Frank again.
Just a few weeks ago, you would of been happy to never see him again. That first time you met him, you wanted to rip his head off, literally. It’s what you were sent to do, what you were programmed to do. Now, though, you have had the chance to think for yourself - decide what you want. You thought when you got out all you would want to do is grab your brother and run as far away from this place as possible, but now the one thing you want to do is stay, and it’s the only thing you can’t do.
Agent Madani might be a good person, but she isn’t a miracle worker. You were still a murderer - wanted by the FBI for hundreds of crimes. There’s only so much one woman would do, and you have sacrificed too much to lose your brother for something as selfish as what you want. Who you want.
Sucking in a deep breath, you follow Franks instructions, packing what little you own into a bag and coming out into the main room.
“You know, I actually kind of liked it in here.” You say, coming up behind Frank as he sorts through what guns he’s packing into a black material bag.
“Yeah? Those alarms sound like home to you?” Neither of you had been able to turn them off, so like clockwork every six hours one of you had to shut them off. Sure, it was annoying as hell, especially at 2 in the morning, but it meant you got to wake up and still feel Frank sleeping behind you. He always woke up before you, so it was the only time you could enjoy it. “Take this.”
“Ah. Old friend.” The pistol Frank gave you in that hotel room now appears in your hand. You had lost track of it the night you got shot. He must of kept it when he stripped you down after saving your life. “Did this not get full of water?”
“Cleaned it up. It’ll be like a lucky charm.”
“Oh yeah, because getting shot in the kidney is a sign of good fortune.” He blows out a laugh, and swings the bag over his shoulder.
“You ready for this?”
“Ready as I’ll ever be.” You go to head towards the door, but he calls your name, snapping your attention back to him.
“If things go wrong in there, and you get your brother-“
“Hey, I thought you said you didn’t to ‘ifs, ands or butts’.”
“I don’t. But there’s a chance things can go wrong. If they do, you need to get him out, and get as far away as possible. No matter what happens.” His face was blank of any emotion, the hardened mask of a soldier.
“I’m not going to bail. I’m better than last time. You know that.”
“I know. Just - whatever happens, you get your family out. Promise me.”
“I’m not going to bail.” You want to tell him the truth, that you wouldn’t bail on him, but you just repeat the words, squaring your shoulders.
“You got a chance at this - to save him. You gotta take it, no matter what.” You feel every word, hitting you as hard as a punch.
“Do you remember what you said to me, that morning after I got shot?” You take a step towards him, pistol still in your hand. “You said you wouldn’t of left me. Then you asked if I would of done the same for you.”
“That’s not the same thing.”
“Yes it is. No matter what happens, we are both walking out of there tonight. Even if I have to drag your ass out myself.” He told you that you would have time. Time to do the things you have imagined doing to him for longer than you would like to admit. You planned on seeing it through, at least tonight. “Now move it, soldier.”
“Yes, ma’am.” He walks past you to the car, and you notice how hard his fist is balled at his side, but you don’t say anything. All you can do is hope to whatever divine power there is that you make it through this night, and that there would be just one more, so you can see that promise through.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
“Stay low.” Frank mouths, and with the minimal light in the tunnel, even your eyes struggle to catch it. You nod, and you both begin to creep forward, seeing the four men guarding the next turn.
You knew coming in the back, there would be men in the way, but at least here you have them cornered, and there’s no other way out. Crouching down, both you and Frank take a side each. He uses his silenced pistol, shooting two in the head swiftly, while you keep your gun your pocket and crack the two guards heads together, feeling the crush of bone underneath your hands.
“Come here.” You tuck yourself behind the stack of dead bodies. The tunnel was only just big enough for you both to lie side by side, and you can see the flashlights up ahead, signalling more people. “It’s gonna get real tight before it opens. This part is small-“
“I remember there’s a cut away, just up to the right. I can fit through the gap and drop in above them, right when it opens to the end.” The hours you spent studying those stupid maps seem to come in handy. All the tunnels lead to one main section, presumably where the waste would have been dumped out and filtered if the project had finished, and it seemed the only likely area a temporary base would be. Frank looks at you with an emotion you can’t place in the dark, and then looks up ahead again.
“Go. I’ll clean it out here. Don’t drop down till I get there.”
“Shout if you need me.” You both stand as quietly as possible, and just as your about to turn and slip out the cutaway, Franks hand wraps around your neck.
He pulls you close, and it’s so dark you can’t see anything but you can smell him. You can hear how hard his heart is beating, running on pure adrenaline. He presses his forehead to yours, and you half hope he might kiss you, no matter how stupid it might be to do that here. He takes in a long breath, prolonging the seconds you have.
“Go.” He says again and lets his hand drop. You spin and turn immediately, knowing if you stood there another second you wouldn’t have the strength to leave.
You find the cut away quickly, and shimmy your way down the small opening above the tunnel. You presumed this was meant for wiring or filter pipes, but either way it was only just big enough for you to shift through. Finally seeing the end, you squint your eyes, looking down and watching as Frank makes his way up the tunnel.
You have only seen him in action once, and even then you were too distracted trying to aim your gun that you couldn’t watch him. He was coming up on about fourteen armed men, all in pretty much a row with little to no cover. You start to worry, maybe he would need help, but he said hold out, so you listen, remembering what happened last time you ignored him.
A guttural scream and a crack of bone snap your head to the right. You hadn’t even seen Frank move over there, but he already downed two men by the time the others realised someone was coming for them. Using the dead body as cover, he fires off perfectly aimed shots, sending bullets into heads and necks, spots he knows will kill instantly.
He drops people like fucking flies. All those articles you read about him taking on rooms full of people with just his fists - you thought they’d been exaggerating, but this was a whole new level. He fired more shots, and when the gun clicked blank, he had timed it perfectly so he was close enough to the last men to fight them hand to hand.
He throws one punch and sends the guy straight into the concrete, and two more men come in at the same time. Holding each one by the neck, Frank yells, and headbutts one while taking the punch of the other in the stomach. It was strategic - he knew he couldn’t fight both at once, so he knocked out the bigger guy first and took the brunt of the smaller, knowing he could finish him off.
He does, spilling his brains out onto the floor using the man’s own gun. He was heaving breaths, and you could hear commotion down the end of the tunnel now that the gunfire had stopped. He looks up at the end of the cut away and nods, then starts running down the tunnel. You shimmy up and out, and when you drop down, Frank is standing right next to you.
He’s covered head to toe in bright red. It’s dripping onto the floor, and when he grabs your arm and pushes something into your hand, you can feel the blood is still warm.
“Take this.” You know it’s his knife, one of the ones you had been throwing for the past few days after you mastered the kitchen knives. “You want right or left?”
You look over the drop down to the main section of the sewer, men with guns running around frantic after seeing a few of the bodies drop down from the tunnel entrance.
“I don’t care, but when we find the Colonel, he’s mine.” Frank nods, and the two of you jump down at the same time. The first guy you meet doesn’t even get the chance to scream before you rip his throat out.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
Franks firing off more rounds than he can count. He had expected this - a bus load of assholes running around scared shitless, but he hadn’t realised just how many people ‘New America’ had. Either way, the two of you were making a big ass dent in them, and Frank could only see about eight people left standing.
You were going strong, using a mix of your own training and the new stuff he taught you. It made you unbeatable. A force, and if Frank didn’t have so many people shooting at him, he wouldn’t of been able to take his eyes off you.
Another guy comes at him, and Frank drops the gun. By his count, the ammo in it is out anyway, and he still has steam left in him. Just as he goes to throw a punch, the man stops his attack, freezes in the air, then drops to the ground like a sack of potatoes.
Then he sees the knife, his knife, sticking out of the back of his head, and looks up to see a smug sort of look on your face.
“We clear?” Frank says, ripping the knife back out of the dead guys skull.
“Clear. The elevator shaft is up ahead, but there’s no actual lift. They have to be down there.” You swallow, chest rising and falling fast.
You lead the way, and Frank stays close behind, ready to dive in if anyone comes out. To get down, you’d have to go one at a time, climbing the service ladder, and he stops you just before the drop, descending first. It’s a long way down, longer than he realised, but you don’t seem surprised.
“Sacred of heights?” You whisper, reading his face way too easy.
“Just a long way out.” You nod, and begin to come down above him.
As you get about halfway, Frank hears it. It’s a woman, crying out in pain. And kids. Kids, screaming. They aren’t saying anything, just yelling out. Terrified. One of them could be your brother, but there’s definitely at least three people down there. A hard whack echos up the shaft, paired with more screaming. Your both moving twice as fast.
Frank hits the ground running, knowing you’ll be right behind him, and then he sees it.
A woman is strapped to a chair, her face bruised and bleeding. There’s two kids behind her, a little girl, no older than ten, and a boy, maybe around 12. For only a second he thinks that could be him - the boy you’ve been looking for your entire life, and then scans the room for anyone else.
A man in a military uniform towers over them, intimidating as he pulls up his fist to punch the woman again.
“Hey!” Franks voice is more animal than man, blood spitting out as he yells across the room. He’s moving fast, and with the momentum, doesn’t think before he just slams his body weight into the man, sending him straight onto the floor.
The Colonel.
You were next to him, and he looks up at you just for a second. He knows if that was your brother you wouldn’t be with him right now, you’d be over there. You look at the boy, and shake your head. It wasn’t him. He wasn’t here.
“Get them out, Frank.” You were towering over the Colonels crumpled body, jaw set tight. A flash of the metal coming out the tips of your fingers clues him in, and he knows this kill is yours.
Turning away, he can only hear the noise of what your doing. The sound of the Colonels scream was music to his ears, but he cut at the ropes tying the woman down.
“You okay to stand?”
“I’m fine - please, my babies. Please they need-“
“It’s okay. We’re gonna get you out of here.” He knew the look in her eyes. A parent who had suffered the worst of it, he could see it all over her body, to make sure her children didn’t face it. He got all three of them to the ladder, and heard another scream of pain from the Colonel. He couldn’t leave you down here, but it was a long way up.
“It’s okay. We can get out.” The little boy says to him, and Frank turns and bends down to his level. “I remember how to go out.”
“Yeah? Alright, buddy. You take this-“ He gives the burner phone he uses to call Madani to the boy, who’s eyes were wide with determination. “And call the number in there as soon as your up the top, okay?”
“Thank you.” The mother pulls him into a hug, not caring about how drenched in blood he is. “My husband-“
“The doctor?” She nods quickly. “He’s alright. He’s in. protective custody. The woman on the phone, she’ll take you to him.”
She looks down at his chest, recognising the bright white skull painted on it.
“We owe you our lives, Frank Castle.” Is what she says before disappearing up the ladder, following her children closely behind. There’s no one alive up the top anyways, so as soon as they dial that number, Madani will come for them.
He’s confident that they’re safe, so he turns back around, seeing your foot pressed against the Colonels neck, blood pooling in the side of his mouth. He pulls over the chair and sits down, content to watch the show.
“Where. Is. He.” You punctuate, and there’s none of that playful glint in your eye he knows so well. No, this was all business. You look how you did when he first met you - cold, wild. Mean. It’s a good look on you, when it’s aimed at someone other than him.
“I don’t. - I don’t kn-“ You slam your foot in his face, then crouch down as he spits out blood and teeth. “They don’t tell me!”
“Then your of no use to me.” Your hand grips his throat, and he can see the blood start to leak out from underneath your fingers.
“Wait! I can he- help you. I’m the only one who could draw the-em out.” He chokes out, and he watches you consider it. Then your hand loosens, and Frank stands up and walks over. The Colonel splutters, and tries to shuffle away from his approaching figure, but you kick him in the ribs and he falls flat.
“Don’t buy it.” Frank leans to whisper in your ear, locking eyes with the Colonel.
“How else do you suppose you can find America’s most notorious mobsters, huh? Whoring yourself out to the Punisher will only get you so f-“ Franks boot whacks him across the face, and he’s out cold.
“Frank.” You say, and hes still staring down at the man, who’s head is slumped to the side.
“He’s alive.” Frank growls, shoving at him with his boot.
“He might have a point.”
“Bullshit he has a point.”
“We could use him as bait. Draw them out and ambush them when they least expect it.”
“That’s if he isn’t still working with them. This wasn’t his entire operation - he’s still got men stationed somewhere.”
“I know. He could be - but either way, what else do we have on the Gnuccis? They’ve been ghosts since Washington.” He can see the frustration on your face. You had really thought your brother was going to be down here. “Maybe we…”
“No. This guys a maggot. We put him down now.”
“No one wants this douche bag dead more than me. Trust me. But, if we can get something out of him before we rip his arms off, maybe we should try. He’s the only lead I have, Frank, and as much as I want to, someone told me to fight with my head, and I’m trying to listen to him.” The Colonel starts to wake up, his head twisting to the other side. Frank sighs.
“Fuck. How do we get him out of here?”
“It’s probably easier if he’s unconscious, right?” Frank nods, and watches as your fist slams into his jaw, sending him straight back to sleep. “We should move. Agent Madani will be here any second. The doctors family - they were okay?”
“Looks like the mother took the worst of it. No idea what this piece of shit did to them down here.” He looks around, surveying the tiny area they had probably been kept in for weeks on end. It stinks like shit, and there was no bed, no place to be except for a tiny corner with a sheet on the ground. Looking back at the unconscious body, his mind starts to drift to all the ways he’s going to pull this guy apart.
“Pick him up. We need to move.” Before he can argue your on the ladder, and he’s swinging the dead weight over his shoulder, shuffling up the ladder.
There’s a part of him that’s relieved. Not because you didn’t get your brother - he thinks he wants that just as much as you do, now. He’s relieved because he thought that last night was it. That would be that last night he would spend with you, and he played it safe, sticking to his side of the bed, not doing shit about that energy he had no doubt you were brewing on too.
He was relieved that you would have the time he promised you, and that after he broke this assholes face for you, he would use that time to drive you just as insane as you have made him, in all the ways he knew how.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
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sunghun · 3 years
Text
enhypen pranking you
requested; yes!
warnings; some cursing??
note; help i feel like this took forever to write 😭 and i literally have no excuses other than procrastination and the fact that i couldn’t think of pranks for like half the boys. hopefully my next post won’t take as long...
unedited so apologies for any mistakes/typos!!
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희승 | heeseung;
okay i feel like heeseung would be the guy to go on reddit and be like “how can i prank my s/o without making them cry or get angry”
will absolutely research until he finds the perfect prank
he decides on the one where you wipe off your s/o’s kisses bc like
that’s a relatively harmless prank right??
if only he knew
so later that day when you two meet up you give him a kiss on the cheek like always
and he just . wipes it off
you can tell he’s kinda trying to be discreet about it
and at first you’re kinda confused by it
but then figured maybe you accidentally put too much chapstick on and left some on his cheek
bc you know. that can happen
but then throughout the day he just?? keeps wiping them off???
eventually you can’t take it anymore
“alright lee heeseung what the fuck is your problem”
immediately he knows he’s screwed up
like you used his government name and everything
“i might’ve been.....idk.....pranking you. or something.”
“😐😐😐”
never tries anything like that again
who knew you could be so scary?
제이 | jay;
okay it took me like 8 years to think of a prank jay would do
but i feel like he might try the “pretending to talk bad about my s/o in another language” thing
like one day when you and him were just having a casual little date
he gets a ‘phone call’
and he’s just like “hey babe do u mind if i take this? sunghoon said he needed to talk about smth”
“ofc baby go ahead 🤗”
and so it begins
the first time you didn’t even realize he said your name
so the next time he like . overemphasized it
and yeah it got your attention it also made you suspicious as hell
his first mistake
you looked at him questioningly thinking that maaaaybe you were being dramatic and he was just trying to get ur attention
but he just ignored you and kept talking
and you kept hearing your name Very clearly
and you can see jay discreetly glancing at you to see your reaction
which just confirms that it’s a prank
and you’re pretty sure you know which one he was trying to do
so after like ten minutes with absolute no reaction from you
jay finally hangs up
and you’re just like “did u have fun pretending to trash-talk about me to sunghoon?”
he just freezes for a second
bc damn he did not expect you to figure it out that quick
but then he just wraps his arm around ur shoulders and grins
“typical y/n. sucking the fun out of everything.”
you’re about to protest
but then he gives you a very sweet kiss
so all is forgiven ❤️
for now
제이크 | jake;
i’m sure we’ve all seen those videos of someone calling their significant other by their name instead of a pet-name or smth
so naturally jake decided to try it on you
bc. ya know.
he only ever calls you cutsey nicknames and shit
his friends like to tease him abt forgetting your name because like. literally he never calls you by it.
but it’s okay because you never call him by his either
bUT anyways
one day when you two were just chilling at your place watching movies and stuff
and you were in the kitchen making some popcorn
so he just goes for it
“hey Y/N can you bring me some water?”
he has to stop himself from losing it at the way you just freeze
“i didn’t know we were back on that level, JAEYUN.”
oh shit
is literally the 😦 emoji
was not expecting the uno reverse card
makes up for it as soon as you sit back down
kisses all over your face and calls you the most ridiculous names.
“i’m sorry my lovely sugarbear, sweetie-pie, pumpkin, baby boo.”
he’s just lucky you didn’t bring him a glass of ice and tell him to wait <3
성훈 | sunghoon;
recently, you got a box from ur mom that was full of all your favorite snacks that you couldn’t get in korea
and you were like . so excited
which is why sunghoon, your lovely but slightly evil boyfriend
decided to play a prank on you
you had been gushing to him about how excited you were to have some of them when you got home from work/classes
and so he decided to hide them
later when you went to get them you almost had a heart attack when you couldn’t find them
“hey babe have seen those snacks my mom sent?”
“oh you mean those odd looking ones? yeah the guys came over earlier and we kinda finished them off. sorry hon.”
now
sunghoon was absolutely ready for you to get mad
he was prepared for shouting and maybe even having a pillow thrown his way
what he was not prepared for was your face falling and tears to start welling up in your eyes
“o-oh. okay.”
“wait y/n-“
but you had already started crying
which might seem like an overreaction but like
you’d had a really shitty day
and looking forward to those snacks and cuddling with your boyfriend was the only thing keeping you going
and you just couldn’t help it :(
“y/n, baby i’m sorry please stop crying.”
runs as fast as he can to where he hid them and brings them back to you
“look, see? i was just pranking you.”
promises that he won’t ever do something like that again
bc he hates seeing you cry :/
선우 | sunoo;
it took me so long to think of a prank sunoo would do 😭
but after some careful consideration
i think he would do smth like give you really salty cookies just to see how you react
like are you gonna tell him they’re awful in a nice way or will you just tell him straight up that they taste like crap??
is so obvious about it tho
“hey y/n wanna try these cookies i made with love just for you~?”
watches your reaction very closely when you take the first bite
he can tell that you’re trying so hard not to make a face
“wow, babe. these are uh, really good. thank you so much!”
wait what
are you.....trying to spare his feelings???
“are you sure? they’re not too salty or anything?”
“nope! i love them!”
did you just take another bite???
this time you can’t hide the grimace quite as well tho 😭
at his blank look you try to take another bite
but he stops you before you can poison yourself anymore
“babe you weren’t supposed to pretend to like them i know they’re awful 🤦‍♂️”
is very touched that you would eat a cookie that is like half salt just for him <3
정원 | jungwon;
okay don’t @ me but i feel like jungwon would just like . try to ignore you
like he saw someone on youtube doing it and their s/o was being super affectionate and cute trying to get their attention
and he’s just like.....😏 hmm.....
so he tries it out the next time you come over to his place
and you’re just . so confused??
bc aside from him opening the door to let you in
your usually sweet and cuddly boyfriend is acting like you’re not even here??
you start trying to get his attention with snuggles and cheek kisses and bringing him something to eat/drink
but the boy won’t budge
and now you’re paranoid
did you do something wrong??
is he really upset????
finally you can’t take it
and you come up to him a little watery eyed
“i don’t know what i did, but i’m sorry. i’ll try not to do it again.”
literally breaks his heart in two 💔
immediately apologizes and tells you that it’s a prank
and then cuddles you the rest of the night without letting go <3
니키 | niki;
one day while watching random youtube videos
niki got the stupid brilliant idea to pretend that he was gonna break up with you
of course he had to wait for the right timing and whatnot
and that seemed to be just a few days later
the two of you planned to play video games and watch some movies
and that seemed like the perfect time to do it
so a few minutes after he got to your place
and you two had just sat down on the sofa
he turned to you all serious and said
“y/n. i hate to do it like this, but i can’t keep it in any longer. i think we should break up.”
“oh thank God.”
wait what
why did you sound.....relieved???
“wh-what?
“yeah i was actually planning on breaking up with you, but you beat me to it! nice one, bro.”
niki frowns
“y/n this isn’t funny.”
“oh but it would’ve been funny if you did it to me?”
yeah turns out jake found out about his little prank and tipped you off
omg but once niki realizes that you’re not actually dumping him he just kinda.....crushes you into a hug
“i’m so sorry you’re right it isn’t funny please don’t leave me.”
the rest of the day is spent much more calmly after you two vow to only play harmless pranks on each other.
853 notes · View notes
jiminrings · 3 years
Note
OKAY LISTEN idk if someone or you already planned sth like this but how about y/n finally decides to confess/tell jk but someone else claims to be her before she could do it so * cue to the angst bc y/n sees the whole thing/she hears from her friends * and ofc koo eventually finds out bc that b*tch doesn't even have the fucking lunchboxes 😑
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cold senior!y/n x stem major!koo masterlist :D
stem koo's the three-peat king for having the best research papers, but he's the worst when it comes to believing the right person
"i think i'm gonna tell him."
you say it to no one in particular, really, but you hear yoongi rISING from his nap on the couch
it wasn't meant to wake him at all
it was just an epiphany of sorts that popped into your head
physically felt as if your head would just bursT if you didn't say it out loud to affirm your own thoughts lmao
"for real???" he's rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, very evident that he wouldn't wake up to finish his thirteen pending assignments but he 10/10 would wake up to hear your epiphany
yoongi is awake for the action!!!! lmao does professor roux from calculus think that he wakes up at the morning and doing shapes (or whatever they teach at calc) is the fIRST thing in his mind????
"interesting," he nods solemnly when you nod your head, reaching out for a fist bump before he plops to your shoulder, "i suggest dressing like a virgin wearing H&M when you confess. it would hit close to home."
yoongi's the touchy affectionate one between the two of you but you'll forgive him bc he's still sleepy
NOOOOOOO
jungkook doesn't look like a virgin wearing H&M :((((
his clothes aren't from there lol
"pass."
"say that you're a top verified contributor both in quora and brainly."
PLEAAAAAASE SJWHSHWHHWV
"nice idea," you snort as yoongs genuinely thinks that it'd get jungkook to propose on the spot, "but no cigar."
"pretend to love big bang theory."
"you're getting onto something here."
"your hobby is fact-checking rick and morty."
"yoongi wow you are on fIRE today-"
"your guilty pleasure is not wearing protective gear during experiments."
"where is this coming from??"
"OH!!!! i'll pretend to mug him or something and you can attack me!!!"
....
??????
yeah yoongi's train of thought just crashed
you were pretty sure he was going on a science theme there wHY DID IT DERAIL
yoongi looks confused because you look confused, as if he didn't just give you the mindblowing idea,, free of charge
lol but no he really didn't
"i'm not doing any of that shit, yoongs."
"oh yeah???" he squints at you and hollows his cheeks, taunting you entertainingly while he worms his way to your lap to nap again
"what are you planning to do?"
holy sHIT this is nerve-wracking
she feels like she's gonna pass out the whole time that she's been rehearsing this in her head
she's been waiting outside the classroom for twenty minutes now and the bell finally rang and she can't believe it!!!! omg is it game-time now
everyone's filing out of the room and she could just feel that jungkook would come out of the room last-
ALRIGHT FUCK THE BELL RANG
you could do this!!!!
everyone's filing out of the room and you know in your heart that jungkook would stay behind, his routine being to politely chat with the professor before he leaves
you're a lil nervous alright
you're scanning the room and there's only a few people left and your eyes instinctively go to the mini desk next to the door and-
FUCK
DID YOU FORGET TO BRING IT HOME YESTERDAY??????
goddamn it
yesterday was when coach jeong was mad because someone from your team just hAD to bring beer!!! and not even have the common sense to put it on a discreet thermos or sth and you know!!!! to not drink it in public or in front of the coach!!!!
doing laps on the oval field will now make you hurl on command just by thinking about it
you physically did not have the cognizance to go and fetch the lunchbox to wash it,,,, or like even move at all
FUCK IT
how are you gonna swipe the lunchbox now? now when the professor's packing up, jungkook's loitering around the classroom, and there's this girl who's-
wait
who's this girl??
who is she and wHY IS SHE EYEING THE LUNCHBOX
fuck it!!! here goes nothing
she's stepping completely into the room and making sure her block heels generate enough clacking,, hands already moving in practiced moments as she attempts in making it seem like she's rushedly putting the lunchbox bag into her tote — as if it's from there, and she's always done this
jungkook hears noises coming from the back of the room, eyes widening before he comes up the stairs in record time
"no. get your own."
he grips the girl's wrist, about to pry off her hands from his lunchbox
he hears her giggle sweetly, the melody being something he's heard before
"i did. after all, i did get you these."
:O
"hyeji?"
hyeji's a pretty girl!!! a nice girl in jungkook's year that wears fit dresses and cartier bangles :D
she stands out really, sometimes literally because she appears in the school's flyers and advertisements
"hyeji," jungkook breathlessly connects the dots including the fact that she looks caught in the act; holding his lunchbox, her tote bag open, and a peek of another completely different lunchbox in her other hand, "i-it's been you this whole time?"
hyeji blushes, sheepishly tucking her perfectly shiny and neat hair behind her ears, "you caught me then."
kook laughs both in nervousness and giddiness, pushing his glasses up and suddenly conscious that he should've worn contacts, "b-but how? we don't share this class."
:O
hyeji bursts into a giggle, blushed cheeks staining further than the five minutes she tried getting the perfect amount
"r-right! kinda amazing what depths you'd go for a person you like, hm?"
jungkook is about to pass out
HE'S PUT IN A SITUATION
a situation that he likes and is too giddy to find a reply for
he apparently doesn't need a reply, because a chair scrapes harshly against the floor and it brings him down to reality immediately
you cannot fucking believe what you just witnessed
you stand abruptly from the seat you've been frozen in with a great deal of urgency because you cAN'T stand to be in this room any longer
they actually forgot that the two of them aren't alone
that you're still here
little miss hyeji's just as shocked
you feel stupid and even more stupid that you're still holding a stupid notebook you even decorated
it has a doodle in the front and all the remaining pages are of the copies you've replicated on jungkook's sticky notes — the same ones you've been trying to make perfect just for him
"y/n!" he sputters when your backpack accidentally leans too much to your side and hits him on the way out
"move."
you’re feeling everything but fine and god you just hated that you always willed yourself to move oN
you’re beyond mad when you put on your jersey!!!
you’re irrevocably dejected when you put on your cleats!!!!
you feel cheated on when you zip up your duffel and walk all the way to the field!!!
it’s a combination of the type of frustration that makes you want to move plus the type that paralyzes you, the whole thing unlike anything you’ve ever felt before
you’re clearly in your head and frankly, you’re just too good
too good that there's no game at all because the only thing happening is you scoring
there's no passing going on or the sort
everyone is just :O looking at their captain to be in the most furiously determined state that they’ve ever seen you in
you don’t even realize that you’re the oNLY one moving in the whole field
“alright, alright — jesus christ! go to the bench and sort your head out, captain,” coach jeong literally has to JOG over to your spot to jolt you
oh there he is again
jaehyun just had to bench you didn’t he
sometimes it’s lost on you that jaehyun, just like seokjin, used to be your senior
he hated juniors with a burning passion and you’re the ONLY one he’s taken a tolerance for
((you lent him your umbrella and it coincidentially had to be a bad day for him tHEN that made him like you))
you’re having none of it though because this time, you’re the one who has the bad day and the captain title does nothing to appease you
“sure, coach.”
you mumble just as lively and walk to completely the fURTHEST side of the bleachers, being so far out that you could barely see your team
what are you supposed to do? simmer in the thoughts you so badly didn’t want to have in silence??????
"y/n?"
the voice you least expected to hear perks up right next to you
what the hell is jungkook doing here now??
he looks lost, two hands clinging onto his backpack straps before tentatively looking at you again
“did i do anything to upset you?”
so he wants to ask that?
you snort automatically, suddenly wishing that you didn’t walk this far because you can’t make an excuse that jaehyun’s calling for you
"because my bag accidentally hit you on the way out? no, jungkook."
jungkook knits his brows in question, seemingly take offense to what you’ve just said to hom
"we're not exactly associated for me to be mad at you, are we?" you emphasize even further, not caring the least bit that your words have an edge to them
he deadpans, pursing his lips before sarcastically smiling at you
".... so you're upset at me?"
://
jungkook takes your silence for him to delve further, not paying attention to how your eye is begging to twitch at him
"i asked if i did anything to upset you, and you said no. but that doesn't necessarily mean you aren't. you could be upset at me even if i didn't do anything to you."
wow
you sound like a real fucking nerd jungkook
"do you have any idea how condescending you sound right now?"
kook barely has a solid inch on you yet the nagging feeling that he’s belittling you makes you grip your fists tight, posture wavering
"so you do admit that you're upset at me?"
he’s not the most patient person either but something about you and the situation right now just makes him tick a little faster
your eyes narrow at what he’s aiming to get at, your hand on your hip feeling heavy at this point
"what does it matter to you if i'm upset or not? we are not-"
"i am associated to you!!! even to a degree!!! you walked me home!"
jungkook is the one who breaks first and he doesn’t look fazed to have opposed you so loudly, still standing by himself
"i would walk anyone home."
"no you wouldn't-"
"i would walk anyone who was as vulnerable and as anxious as you were, jungkook!!"
it is true
you’d walk anyone home within reason regardless if they were jungkook or not!!!
the guy in question only looks at you straightly, brows not stubborn but still just as unrelaxed
:((
"good to know. then you're not upset at me, and i didn't do anything to upset you."
"sure."
you only say just to spite him, about to turn your back and leave him completely to go back to your practice game
jungkook surprises you again and flips a switch just as quick as your mini argument of sorts escalated
"anyways!! i'm sorry for being a little off when i interviewed you that day. i got a 100 on that assignment, by the way :))"
what?
what’s he still doing here?
he’s talking about his grades and whatnot to you as if literally twenty seconds ago did nOT happen!!
"why are you still-"
"and the one who's been giving me my lunchboxes confessed to me today!! for hyeji to be the girl giving me them, it makes perfect sense."
you shrug away the weirdness that jungkook’s moved on from the argument as fast as this, trying a take two for a peaceful conversation
this time, you’re the one who unknowingly flips a switch at her name — something so foreign and sudden yet something you quickly grew to hate
"i wouldn't be so trusting if i were you."
that seems to hit a nerve on him again, making him scoff in reply
"good thing you aren't me then."
what is ON with him????
"watch it. i'm your senior, kid."
you’re more irritated than the first and second time around that you’ve been agitated this day
"why? are you normally this self-absorbed that you wouldn't trust a girl who's confessed??"
self-absorbed?
you aren’t the most selfless person ever but god do you know for a fact that you’re not vain as jungkook’s insisting you to be
you hate him.
you hate this version of him that isn’t the same jungkook you’ve known to like ever since the start of the semester
"same thing as polygraphs not being a hundred percent reliable. anyone could tell the truth as long as you ask the wrong questions," you detail on further because jungkook loves details, right? might as well give him several
"or did you even ask?"
jungkook scowls as if you’ve insulted his mother and his entire lineage, face contorting into everything but warm
"what does it matter to you? didn't you just tell me that we aren't associated? why are you projecting all your moaning on hyeji?"
WHAT
WHAT????
"you know what? maybe i am associated to you. i think i'd also tell this to everyone i'd walk home — maybe you shouldn't be too trusting, huh? maybe you shouldn't just let anyone walk you home."
the tears this time are more insistent to come out this time but you’d rather dIE than for jungkook to stain your pride like this
"no one should walk me home, besides you? is that what you're trying to say?"
no!!
for fuck's sake you aren't even finished with your point!!
before you could continue, jungkook shakes his head at you — the most disappointing shake of his head that it curses you soft
"what am i even doing? you wouldn't understand."
he closes the distance that’s been alarmingly shorter throughout the whole time, jungkook being the one to break it
"because no one gives you lunchboxes. no one exerts effort in making you cheerful — no one wants to go the extra mile for you, and no one wants to walk you home."
he's insulting you right to your face and that’s when your dam breaks, lips quivering impossibly as you stare him down with a genuinely pained gaze you didn’t know you carried
"you wouldn't know what i feel, because no one likes you."
jungkook gets the last word in.
he leaves you in the same field he's first approached you in nervousness.
today, he leaves it differently.
sweat isn't the only thing on your face but instead it’s the frustrating hot tears you haven’t had in awhile
your fists are balled but there's no power to the anger behind it
you’re almost always alone outside the company of the closest friends you’ve ever had — but this is the only time that you truly felt that you are alone.
today's a good day to give up on jungkook.
526 notes · View notes
peakgenko · 3 years
Text
Songs the Haikyuu boys would slow dance with you to...
CW; suggestive sexual themes
N/A, my heart nutted while writing this tbh
not proofread!!
© All content belongs to damnihateithere.
Kei Tsukishima
Dream A Little Dream of Me- The Mamas & The Papas
I don’t even know how i made this connection but i feel like tsukishima hums a lot of old songs and so this would be one of them
Or slow dancing in the dark by joji. it’s his favourite song. because of you.
Yuu Nishinoya
So Good At Being in Trouble- Unknown Mortal Orchestra
You’d rock back and fourth with him slowly while his lips press against the back of your hand— his eyes staring intently while he hums the lyrics
Shoyo Hinata
I’m Yours- Jason Mraz
So it’s not really something you can slow dance to but this is definitely his song for you. He sings this to you in the showers, during pillow talk, or drum the rhythm with his fingers against a Tupperware when he’s cooking something for you.
He’ll pull you in by the waist and nuzzle his head up against your back with a grin.
At this point it’s his favourite song because it always gets him in the mood. But that’s only because he thinks of you when he hums it.
Rintarō Suna
Versace On The Floor- Bruno Mars
OMG
okay so I imagine the two of you on some dance floor. Like at a club. I head canon that he’s good at dancing. Effortlessly too.
The music stops and and they choose a slow song to end the evening
You’re wearing a dress that cuts off mid thigh. And he’s in a little suit. His blazers loose and his collared shirt is buttoned down since it got a little heated in the midst of sweaty bodies practically grinding up against eachother
Underneath the red and purple spotlights, specks of iridescent lights from the disco ball hanging from the ceiling arrange themselves on your faces.
He’s singing the lyrics wholeheartedly with a fox like grin while his hands roam down to your ass. Although it’s intent was far from sexual.
Atsumu Miya
Corduroy Dreams- Rex Orange County
LOVE LOVES WHISTLING IT TO YOU
Definitely does kiss you in the shower for a couple hours.
He’s fresh out of the shower and he’s wearing nothing but a pair of sweatpants. Drops of water race down to his feet as they roll down his bare chest. You have your towel wrapped around your chest
One hand laced with his, he leads you in a slowing pace around the room with a chirpy smile.
Osamu Miya
Blessed- Daniel Caeser
i’m not sure how i made this conclusion but i’m gonna go with it
He has the prettiest voice when he sings along.
It’s not really dancing though. He has your back facing his chest while his arms enveloped on top of your collar bones and shoulders. He’s pecking gentle kisses against your cheek while rocking back and fourth to the song while you two prepare breakfast.
Keishin Ukai
Fly Love- Jamie Foxx
I imagine you two on some sort of resort of beach. You two are soaked of water but this song just happens to pop up so you stand there in his arms while he teasingly blows a cloud of smoke into your face.
Keiji Akaashi
HENTAI BY CIGARETTES AFTER SEX!!!!
okay for those of you who don’t know that song i know by the title of the song it looks sus and trust me he was definitely skeptic of it as well but give it a listen because now you’re all he ever thinks about when he hears this song.
he swears he’ll dance to this with you in his arms on your wedding day.
if you’re feeling angsty, he’d definitely hold you close and dance with you to the swan by camille saint-saëns
Wakatoshi Ushijima
I Hear A Symphony- Cody Fry
He loves how classy it sounds and it perfectly describes how he feels about you. hell it may even be his favourite song.
He felt like volleyball was his only purpose and for a while he was more than okay with that. until he met you and now he strives for more in life. Hence the whole “I used to hear a simple song” verse. loves putting emphasis in his tone when singing “perfection is so quick to bore...you are my beautiful by far” (only to himself of course) homeboy gets a little embarrassed when it comes to singing.
Daichi Sawamura
Nothing’s Gonna Hurt You Baby- Cigarettes After Sex
I don’t even need to have a scenario for this like he just radiates this energy:((
Like imagine his cheek pressed against yours while his hand weaves through your hair
Tadashi Yamaguchi
You say I’m in love- Banes World!!!!!!!!
Head empty just you and yams dancing to this song underneath LEDs and a ceiling projector
you’re all he thinks about when he sings this song
and bubblegum by clairo- he’d tell you not to focus on the lyrics but instead the instrumental portion. he says the comforting mellow beat reminds him of you.
Kenma Kozume
Nothing- Bruno Major.
Sings the lyrics to you
You’d think he’d be too shy and youre right but it’s because he does it subconsciously.
BRO THIS WOULD LITERALLY BE HIS SONG IN A RELATIONSHIP
Aran Ojiro
Ugotme- Omar Apollo
Such a good singer as well
When the two of you dance, you two dance.
His ability to dance is almost mesmerizing along with his singing.
Sings while covering your neck and collarbones with kisses
Satori Tendou
How Deep Is Your Love- Bee Gees
Also dramatically lip syncs the lyrics to you
Lifts you up into the air and into his arm almost five times mid dance.
He’ll shake his head with his lips pressed up against your neck while his hands trail upwards and toy with the hem of your shirt, his hands hungry with anticipation to just rip it off.
and you scold him when you feel his lips contort into a devilish grin.
Kotaro Bokuto
Hopelessly Devoted To You- Olivia Newton John
hear me out. He only knows this song because akaashi made him watch grease bc he says bokuto should be exposed to the “classics” and since watching it at age 12 with akaashi and bo’s two sisters, he’s prayed that one day he’d meet someone that’d make him feel the way that song did.
He does now and everytime that songs on he’s practically carrying you in his arms.
Tobio Kageyama
Love Me Please- OCTAVIO
this is the only song he knows with the exception of old kanye west because he considers his music grind music but you definitely put him on this song.
He’s literally a psychopath who doesn’t listen to anything EXCEPT like popular rap songs from 2017-2018. And even then he’ll only tolerate it when he needs to work out.
And then he meets you. Now he listens to music in a different aspect.
He knows he’s not the most romantic guy out there but he’s trying his best and you tell him that’s more than enough. He loves you so much.
Koushi Sugawara
This Side of Paradise- Coyote Theory
he’s dragging you out of the house to dance with you to this song. bonus points if it’s raining
he’s also the type to scream-sing to love songs.
There aren’t any cars in the vicinity due to the pouring rain so the two of you make your way to the road.
Your hand in his, he twirls you underneath the storm and into his arms.
Toru Oikawa
Pretty Boy- The Neighborhood
He’ll put so much emphasis in his tone on the “Even if the earth starts shaking, you’re the only thing worth taking- with me. Even if the sky’s on fire, got you here it’s alright.” verse
You’re literally everything to him
he won’t let you go even for a second until this song is finished even then he’ll have trouble parting.
Hajime Iwaizumi
Baby I’m Yours- Arctic Monkeys cover
It’s not even dancing at this point, it’s just you two cuddling and him pretending like he hates it even though he’s the one who refuses to let go of you.
Ryonusuke Tanaka
Knockin’ Da Boots- H-town
if he’s not dancing to this with you in his arms he’s definitely ironically grinding on the floor to this with a fuck boy face.
Hitoka Yachi
two queens in a king sized bed- girl in red
I just imagine the most “call me by your name” scenery type shit.
Or maybe like a field of flowers? You just have her in your arms on some sort of picnic date she planned for the two of you
Semi Eita-
I Wanna Be Yours- Arctic Monkeys
your arms wrap around his neck and his lips press onto yours while the two of you sway back and fourth underneath red led lights.
don’t be surprised if things get sexual.
Tetsuro Kuroo
Careless Whisper- George Michael
okay first he played this song when you were over once and he had it on so that he could initiate a little make out sess with you but when you could tell how nervous he was on making a move on you you told him that there was no pressure on anything and he sort of just danced with you instead. he ended up unironically really liking this song because of that.
(bonus: if it’s fanon kuroo he likes to dance to sway by Michael Bublé with you and the whole time he’s just eyeing you down with a sly grin)
Kiyoomi Sakusa
Beach Baby- Bon Iver
Space Song- Beach House
I imagine it’s raining horribly outside to the point where the thunder outside is retro boomin
but the windows are open because both you and Sakusa love the sound of rain pouring
he has this song playing from his record player while he hums against your neck.
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arrowflier · 3 years
Note
hi arrow! can i get a fic of ian being jealous on a date (maybe someone flirts with mickey??) and mickey just loves it bc it makes ian all passive aggressive and bossy and saying 'my husband' 283949 times ❤️
Of course you can!  Or at least I tried lol, it got a little random.💖
That Green-Eyed Monster (is my husband)
They never had really gotten in the habit of going on dates, before. Not real dates at least, in public places where you could eat with utensils or sit side-by-side and pretend to watch the entertainment while you were really just watching each other. They had tried, but something always got in the way--the military, jail sentences, arrest warrants, pandemics, family emergencies--they just had shit luck, alright?
So when things got a little less crazy on the aforementioned fronts, they started trying a little bit harder. They had a designated date night, now. Sometimes they planned together, sometimes they took turns surprising each other with heartfelt (or sometimes comical) plans.
This time, it had been Mickey's turn.
“Where are we going?” Ian asked yet again from where he was blindfolded in the passenger seat of Tami’s car.  They’d usually take the ambulance, but Mickey didn’t want to stick out too much today—not in a place where an ambulance could potentially be needed.
“I still ain’t gonna tell you,” Mickey answered, but relented enough to add, “we’re almost there though, you’ll see soon.”
Sure enough, the entrance to the parking lot came up on the right, and Mickey swung in in that ridiculous little car.
As soon as Ian felt the car stop, he was reaching for his blindfold—not one of their good ones, just an old headband they had found on Debbie’s floor—but Mickey grabbed his hand before he could slip it off.
“Hey hey hey,” Mickey chastised.  “What’s the rush there, flash?”
“What, I can’t be a little eager for our date?” Ian pouted, knowing it would get Mickey to give in.  No matter how many times he tried to pretend that he wasn’t soft, Mickey always gave in to the pout.
He was right.  Gentle hands pushed the headband off of Ian’s eyes, which were immediately filled with the sight of Mickey’s own as the other man ran fingers through Ian’s hair in an attempt to smooth it down.
“Alright, come on then,” Mickey ordered, leaving one firm kiss at the corner of Ian’s lips before pulling back and getting out of the car.  “If you’re so eager, you get to pay.”
Ian chuckled as he let himself out and met Mickey around the front of the car.  “Why would I pay?” he asked jokingly.  “It’s your week to woo me, asshole, you get to foot the bill.”
“Foot the bill with your money, sure,” Mickey retorted, and Ian rolled his eyes as he automatically fell into step beside him.
“Our money,” he reminded his husband, getting an arm around his waist.  He was always surprised when Mickey let him do that—he said it felt awkward to walk with the jolly red giant suckered onto his side—but this time Mickey actually leaned into him.
He didn’t even notice where they were, outside a little building in the middle of nowhere.  He let go of Mickey to walk through the door ahead of him, fully intending to continue their playful banter, when he stopped still.
There were a lot of guns in this place.
Paintball guns, that was.
“Mickey,” Ian said slowly as his husband came up behind him, “did you bring me here to shoot me?”
Mickey just smirked as he swanned past toward the check-in desk.
“Maybe, hotshot,” he answered.  “You gonna complain?”
Ian shook his head with a shit-eating grin.  
“Hell no,” he declared.  “You better be ready for me.”
Mickey signed his name on a waiver with a flourish and took the gun handed to him by a worker, tossing it to Ian.
“Am I ever not?”
Ian was having a blast, pun intended, as he shot the shit out of everybody else on the range.  Mickey wasn’t faring too badly either; despite being on the opposite team, neither one of them had managed to shoot each other yet.
It didn’t hurt that Mickey looked damn good, either.  He was completely in his element out here, taking guys out left and right with perfect marksmanship and even more perfect form, his shoulders barely moving with the recoil as he shot.  Half the time, Ian missed his chance because he was too busy watching him to fire—the other half, he didn’t even want to if it meant taking Mickey out of the game and losing his eye-candy.
Finally, a break was called, and everyone filed off the course while it was reset for the next round.
Ian grabbed a bottle of water from a long table near the building, guzzling half of it in one go before looking around for his husband.
He found him quickly enough, recognizing his back immediately even in unfamiliar gear with his hair all mussed from the protective helmet they had to wear.
But he did not recognize the man standing next to Mickey, raking his eyes over Mickey’s stocky build.  
The stranger was saying something, Mickey tossing his head back in laughter, and then a hand was on Mickey’s arm and Ian suddenly found himself at Mickey’s back.
“Everything good here, fellas?” Ian asked casually, standing a couple feet away.
“Fine, Gallagher,” Mickey said with a smile.  “Johnny here was just tellin’ me he could give me some pointers before the next round.”
Ian raised his eyebrows, glancing from Mickey’s face to the stranger’s and back.
“Pointers?” he asked, voice going a touch high at the end.  Who the fuck did this guy think he was, offering shooting pointers to Mickey fucking Milkovich?  He had gotten there just in time, it seemed, because there was no way in hell Mickey would let that insult slide.
“Yeah,” Mickey said.  “Says I need to work on my form a little, widen my stance, you know.  Thought I’d give it a shot.”
Wait.  What?
“I was just telling him,” the stranger—Johnny, though how they were on a first name basis already Ian had no idea—chimed in, “that I have a lot of experience with real firearms.”
“And I was sayin’ how much I admire a military man,” Mickey interjected with a smirk, “so I might as well let him show me some moves.”
“Mickey,” Ian hissed lowly, “what are you doing?”
Mickey didn’t answer.
“You ever shot a real gun, Mick?” Johnny asked abruptly, catching on that he was missing something but determined not to lose Mickey’s attention.  
“It’s like nothing else, dude, I swear.  The feel of that smooth metal in your hands,” he continued as he moved closer, lifting a hand to Mickey’s arm again. “The way it moves with you, goes off when you,” he leaned in even closer, and added in a low voice, “pull the trigger.”
Alarm bells were ringing in Ian’s head at this point.
“Nah,” Mickey was answering, “my guy won’t let me play with the real stuff.”
“Sounds like you need a new guy, then,” Johnny murmured, and Ian had had enough.
“He’s taken,” he cut in gruffly, moving to stand by Mickey’s side.  He couldn’t hold Mickey with the gear in the way, but he got a hand on his back, at least, curling fingers into the top of his waistband.
Johnny looked at him askance, and shrugged.  
“I don’t see a ring,” he pointed out, and Ian grit his teeth.  They had taken them off before starting, for safety, and he never regretting following the rules more a day in his life.
“Besides, who are you to speak for him?” Johnny asked.
“Oh, this is Ian,” Mickey introduced quickly.  He was smiling, the asshole, like some guy wasn’t trying to steal him from right under Ian’s own nose.  “He’s my—”
“His husband,” Ian stated firmly, and watched Johnny’s eyes go wide.  “His ex-army, ex-con husband.”
“Hey man, I’m sorry,” Johnny apologized, hands up.  “I didn’t know.”
Ian nodded, ready to let it go despite his urge to send the man packing, when Johnny insisted on talking again.
“You can’t blame me though, right?” he said with a little, nervous laugh.  “I mean, he looks so damn—”
He didn’t finish his sentence, too busy keeling over with his hands on his groin after Ian shot a paintball right at his balls at point-blank range.
Two minutes later, Ian and Mickey were racing to the car as employees chased behind them, yelling.  Apparently it was frowned upon to shoot someone on your own team, outside the course itself, during a break.  It didn’t help that Mickey had done the same right after, just for fun.
“Hurry up, you jealous fuck,” Mickey shouted at Ian as he fumbled with the door handle.  “We gotta get outa here before they realize I gave them fake names!”
Ian fell into the car, giddy with adrenaline and laughter.
“The fuck did you do that for?” he giggled as Mickey threw the car into reverse and peeled out of the lot.
“Cause I knew you would do something stupid!” Mickey said, shoving at Ian’s shoulder with one hand when Ian just laughed harder.
Ian gather himself as they drove, and felt his heart-rate start to normalize after a few minutes on the road.  He held Mickey’s hand over the gearshift, finger rubbing over the spot where his ring should be—where it would be again as soon as they had a minute to breathe.  Then, just as he was almost calm—
“Shit, Ian,” Mickey gasped.  “We didn’t return the fucking guns.”
That set them off again, and they had to pull over halfway home until they could stop laughing and hide the paintball guns under the back seat.
Franny and Fred would love them come Christmas.
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fantastic-bby · 3 years
Text
SKZ vs. being embarrassingly drunk
Pairing: Reader x Member 
Word count: 3k
Genre: Fluff
Summary: Spending a night out with the boys and they get absolutely hammered (and cuddly)
Warnings: Alcohol usage
A/n: 1. Pls drink responsibly 2. Anon I’m so sorry this took so long but I hope you enjoy it ^^’
Masterlist
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Chan
Probably wouldn’t let himself get drunk drunk
Like he knows how to have a good time 
He just wouldn’t get all CRONKED 
Or at least he would try to avoid that 
BUT 
There’s a big but 
He strikes me as someone who has a low/moderate alcohol tolerance 
Which means that if he really doesn’t watch how much he’s taking 
This man would end up flying into the next dimension
So in the situation that he does end up getting cronked 
He probably would be clingy or quiet 
Would hug onto you like a koala 
Would also end up being embarrassing  in his mind he’s doing perfectly fine
“(Y/n), you’re reeeeeeeally pretty” 
Ofc you’d just giggle at him 
You’re aware of how Chan doesn’t really let himself go like this 
You find it so amusing but you know he should probably drink water or smth so he doesn’t end up throwing up in the bathroom 
“Drink water, Channie” 
“No!”
-_-
“I don’t need water, (Y/n). I have youuuuu”
Chan wraps his arms around you and kinda smooshes his face into your arm
And as much as you love how amusing it is 
He hasn’t drank water since he started drinking alcohol
“Channie”
You slide the glass towards him and he shakes his head like a child
Of course he has to be stubborn when he’s drunk 
“Drink water”
He sticks his tongue out at you 
Now you’re >:( bcs you don’t want anything happening to him!! 
“Drink the water, Chris”
The moment he hears his English name it’s almost like he sobers up a bit 
“Why are you so scary?”
He wouldn’t admit that when he’s sober 
But he’s scared of you only because you have the tendency to be strict with him when it comes to taking care of himself 
You’re the only person that he honestly listens to when it comes to caring for himself but he would NEVER admit it 
Bcs admitting to that means admitting that he likes you c: 
Chan listens 
He drinks the water and he smiles when you smile at him
“Good job, Channie” 
The praise makes him give you a toothy smile while he wraps his arms around you again and pulls you into a hug uwu
Minho
Seems like he would get cronked on a normal Tuesday evening bcs he can 
But I think Chan mentioned once?? That they actually don’t like alcohol?? Don’t quote me on this pls I could be wrong
Anygays 
Minho would probably just be really flirty or might become more dry 
Like he would roast people more than usual if he gets cronked 
“(Y/n), you should drink more, you lightweight”
But you know he’s joking 
Would pretend he isn’t flustered 
Tbh if he gets flustered while he’s drunk 
It’s not like anyone can tell bcs his face might be red as hell
“(Y/n), do the shots”
o_o
“I have to drive you guys home”
“Noooooooo, you have to drink with meeeee” 
Minho grabs onto your hands and he starts tugging you closer to him 
Kinda just grabs you and pulls you until you fall into his lap 
“Let loose, baby” 
Wow okay 
o_O 
“We can always get someone else to drive us home”
O_O
He pushes the shot glass towards you 
And you’re just staring at him like uhhh…
The reason Minho wants you to drink with him is lost in his wasted ass mind 
But he just wants to make sure you don’t remember anything that he might end up telling you
Like if Min accidentally confessed to you c: 
But he can’t really tell the difference between sober you and drunk you when he’s absolutely wasted out of his mind 
“I think you’re really nice, (Y/n)” 
“You’re nice too, Lino”
“Nonononono”
He shakes his head as he pushes you back so that you’re sitting straight and pulls you towards him so that he can hug you
“I think I like (Y/n). But you can’t tell them that” 
Oh no 
“(Y/n)’s always so pretty and cool looking”
“Minho”
“Nooo sshh I’m not done talking yet” 
You just look at him like :| bcs you know that when you tell him about this in the morning, he’s gonna be embarrassed and start whining about why you didn’t give him water
Which you actually tried to do 
Minho just 
Decided he didn’t want any water -_-
“Do you think (Y/n) likes me back?” 
A whole ass cutie 
You laugh and smile 
“Definitely” 
Changbin
This man 
I had input from some of my other friends 
We all collectively agreed that this man is a TANK 
And by ‘tank’ I mean he would not get drunk easily 
Could probably take Changbin like a shit ton of shots before he starts to feel anything 
So if he gets drunk drunk 
He might end up being a bit more wee woo than usual 
And by ‘wee woo’ I mean that he would be completely off the fucking rails excuse my language
But I feel like since Binnie’s more of an extrovert anyway, if he were to get drunk then 
Well
He would be even more of an extrovert 
Like he would be going WILD 
So if he was embarrassingly drunk and you just happened to be his crush 
“(Y/n)!!!!! (☆▽☆)” 
His face is red, his shirts |  | this close from coming off, and his beanie is lost under someone’s ass because he threw it off before he started dancing on the bar
“Bin, get down before you hurt yourself”
He looks down at you w his head tilted and this grin on his face
You have to admit his eyes are sparkling like you’re the most interesting person in the room and it makes your heart bust the fattest uwu
“Come on!” 
He doesn’t give you a choice 
Changbin’s climbing down the bar and taking your wrist to drag you towards a less crowded area 
“Dance with me!” 
His hands are holding yours respectfully while he sways you’re actually keeping him up bcs he’s stumbling all over the place
“Binnie, be careful” 
He almost trips and you have to hold this hunk of a man up 
He giggles tho and pokes at your cheek
“You’re so cute. I’ve spent so long wanting to tell you that I find you so cute!”
Now you’re blushing like a mess 
“You shouldn’t drink so much, (Y/n). Your face gets super red!”
:|
Yeah blame it on the alcohol when you haven’t even drank a drop
“You need water” 
Luckily for you, Changbin obediently follows you to the bar so you can get him water 
He gulps it down almost immediately and you panic slightly because he might choke
But he’s fine when he puts the glass down 
For a moment he turns to you and his eyes widen 
Like he’s sobered up and he realises what he’s done
“Oh god—”
“More drinks for the entire bar!” 
You look towards the voice 
Surprisingly it’s Chan 
You turn back to Changbin and he’s already on his fifteenth shot of the night -_-
Hyunjin
A FLIRT!!!
If he’s already a flirt now 
Alcohol would just increase his flirting to a BILLION 
I hate him and his perfect face and his perfect dancing and his perfect hair I HHHHHHHHHHH
Hyunjin strikes me as someone who would either be more moderate to high tolerance w alcohol 
So he would probably be better at holding his alcohol than Chan is but not as much as Changbin 
But this man OOF he probably also just starts dancing like a madman when he’s drunk and also flirting with everything he sees 
He might even flirt w a chair but that’s just me bullying him at this point
I feel like he would only get hammered on nights when he either needs to relieve stress or when he knows he doesn’t have anything important the day after 
So it’s like a weekend, Hyunjin’s chilling with the gang, he’s drinking 
You know he’s pretty much gone when he slams his shot glass on the table and turns to you 
“(Y/n)... you are… amazing”
You stifle a laugh but you don’t say anything bcs you see that he’s still going 
“You’re like… godly… I can’t believe you’re driving me home…”
His eyes are barely open btw that’s how hammered he is 
“I can’t believe I’ve never told you this before”
“Mhm? What is it?”
“It’s a secret”
He moves closer towards you and smooshes his face against your shoulder
Hyunjin opens his eyes a bit more and they sparkle when he sees you 
“I like you”
“Aww”
Your heart’s actually beating a million a minute bcs you’re certain he’s confessing to you
But you wanna brush it off as just him meaning it as liking you as a friend
“No, you don’t get it. I like like you.” 
“Huh”
“I never wanted to tell you because I didn’t want anything happening to our friendship”
“Hyunjin…”
Aaaaaand he passes out 
(;¬_¬)
Now what do you do
He’s snoring now 
Oh god 
“Jinnie”
You shrug your shoulder lightly to wake him up and his head snaps up to look around 
“Huh”
“I think it’s time to go home”
Of course, when you take him home, you leave water and advil on his bedside table 
You also make a mental note to ask him about his confession in the morning 
But Hyunjin’s too cronked to have a proper conversation so you’re honestly not even sure if he’ll remember the whole thing :|
Jisung
Might retreat to himself 
I don’t know where exactly Sungie would be on the skz drunk spectrum
But it’s probably low to moderate so maybe around wherever Chan ranks
When he’s drunk he’ll probably cling onto someone he’s comfortable with 
Just so happened to be you 
Jisung’s usually quiet when he’s drunk because he doesn’t like talking or he feels too lazy to actually talk 
But he’s hugging your arm like a koala when he puts his eighth beer bottle down onto the table
Everyone else left to dance except for you, Jisung and Jeongin 
Jeongin’s pretty much bordering passing out beside you while Jisung doesn’t seem to be leaving your side anytime soon
“Sungie do you wanna go dance with the guys?”
He shakes his head like a stubborn child and only holds onto you tighter 
“Okay”
You pat his head and he leans into your touch when you do 
God he's so shdjdbdje a aDORABLE
"Sungie, do you want some water?" 
He nods silently and you slide the glass towards him
He drink the water without a problem but then turns to you
"You’re like an angel" 
Jisung’s lips are kinda pouty as he looks at you with half-lidded eyes 
“You alright?”
He nods before leaning his head against your shoulder and curling up closer against you 
“You’re warm” 
(。♥‿♥。)
“Do you wanna go home now?”
“I wanna cuddle with you” 
AAAAAAAAAAAAAA
You tilt your head and Jisung only looks up at you with a slightly bigger pout 
“(Y/n), I wanna cuddle with you” 
You give him water and he almost spills it drinks it
“(Y/n)! Come on and dance!”
It’s Minho
He’s pretty much pissfaced 
But Jisung shakes his head furiously and almost pops your arm with how tight he’s holding on
“Don’t go!”
You turn to him and your heart almost bursts out of your chest with how cute he looks 
So you turn back to Minho
“It’s okay, Min. You guys have fun”
“I don’t want you to go anywhere”
Jisung’s voice is softer now and you’re pretty sure he might pass out soon
That’s when you decide it’s time to head home 
“Let’s take you home, Jisung”
“Are we gonna cuddle?”
“We can do whatever you want once we get back” c: 
Felix
Super giggly 
There’s two outcomes to drunk Felix 
Cuddly Lix 
Or ready to party Lix 
I feel like he falls on the lower end for alcohol tolerance 
Wouldn’t be surprised if he gets hammered after just a few shots 
But also wouldn’t be surprised if he tried to control his alcohol intake for the sake of staying sober 
In the chance that he does get hammered tho 
He would be a giggling mess 
“(Y/n), drink drink drink!” 
Lix pushes the bottle towards you and you laugh bcs you’re supposed to stay sober for the night 
“I can’t drink tonight, Lix”
“Nononono! Someone else can drive us home! We can always call a cab!”
You give him a look that tells him that you really shouldn’t and it gets him pouting 
You pat his head as a silent apology just as you turn around to see Changbin and Hyunjin playing with the empty bottles
Immediately you’re like AA WHAT so unfortunately you have to turn your attention away from Felix to stop the rest of your friends from getting kicked out of the bar
Felix gets even more pouty 
Because he wants your attention! 
Because he likes you and he’s wondering why you’re giving everyone else your attention! 
Felix becomes quiet 
His intoxicated state makes it easier for his mood to dampen he typically wouldn’t be so open about his feelings
But now he’s all sad and pouty and watching you stop his friends from trashing the entire place 
And he only thinks 
Give me attention!!!! 
So he starts tugging on your hand 
“Hold on, Lix. CHANGBIN”
He retreats into his seat and sulks 
 When you turn back to him he’s just watching you with his brown eyes all sad looking 
“I’m sorry, Lix”
“Hmph” TT
You pat his head gently until he leans into your touch and finally returns to holding onto your arm 
Seungmin
Idk why but he’s part of the higher alcohol tolerance line 
Probably up there w Changbin 
I genuinely don’t know why but I feel like Seungmin holds his alcohol really well
But I also feel like he’s among the line that tries to stay away from actually getting really really drunk unless he knows that he can let loose 
So if he’s like cronked as hell
It would probably be after about eight or nine shots 
His face is all red, he’s just kinda stumbling all over the place and trying to convince you that he can walk in a straight line 
“(Y/n), I’m totally fine, I promise”
“You just tripped over a whole table…”
It takes a bit of convincing but he finally lets you guide him from the bar to your table he tried to push you away at first but then he almost fell over
Seungmin almost immediately falls into his seat 
When you sit next to him 
He squeezes closer to you and throws his arm over your shoulder 
“(Y/n), you have to spend more time with us”
You give him a silent agreement by nodding your head because you know that if you open your mouth you’ll probably end up laughing instead 
“I don’t know why I’ve never told you this, but I like you a lot”
HUH 
O_O
“Minnie, you’re drunk”
You try to tell yourself he’s just spitting nonsense because he’s drunk 
But at the same time 
He probably wouldn’t be saying it if it wasn’t true because he’s drunk
“Nooooo, you don’t get it”
He shakes his head and moves closer to you 
“I’ve never told anyone this, but I really like you. You’re really cool and you’re really pretty and I don’t know why I’ve never mentioned this before”
“Hahaaaaa…”
“I’m so glad that you’re drunk because then you won’t be able to remember this”
“Seungmin…”
How are you supposed to tell him… 
“It’s okay, (Y/n). I don’t think I’ll remember this either when I wake up.”
You just watch him and try not to giggle because he’s cute, but your heart’s about to break through your chest from how hard it’s pounding 
How are you supposed to bring this up in the morning without embarrassing him 
But you can’t just ignore it either 
“Can you take me home please? I think I’m done for tonight”
You’re surprised he actually has the mind to tell you that he wants to go home before having more shots, but you oblige anyway
The conversation of his confession can wait until the morning 
Jeongin
Feels like he’d be more on the quiet side 
Maybe he’d be slightly more giggly and excited 
But I feel like he’d just be clingy and quite kinda like Jisung 
So he wouldn’t want to leave your side either ^-^
But he’s also this |  | close to passing out in the bar
You’re there to drive him home but you’re also there to make sure he doesn’t get hurt while he’s there bcs Jeongin would be super stumbly 
You hold onto him bcs you’re paranoid and you’re worried 
Part of you knows that he would most likely be fine 
But he’s a smol child so you’re just making extra sure he won’t get hurt 
Might get a bit reckless too will tell you he’s fine
He’s sitting beside you while you try to make sure he doesn’t wander off on his own like Minho has and no one knows exactly where in the bar he is
“(Y/n) can we go to the arcade?” 
You turn to him and he has these soft pleading eyes that just make you go AGH (♥ω♥*)
“Not now, Innie. Maybe tomorrow”
Oh no
HE’S POUTING NOW 
You go into mild panic bcs you’re worried he might get sad 
But instead he smiles lazily 
“Don’t worry, (Y/n). I’ll wait until tomorrow” ^-^ 
“As long as I get to spend more time with you, I’ll wait”
AWWWW 
“We can spend as much time as you want, Innie.” 
His smile only grows and he leans into you
“You’re always so nice to me”
Jeongin’s smile becomes cheekier 
He giggles and closes his eyes 
Leans his head on your shoulder
“Innie, are you tired?”
He nods silently 
“Do you wanna go home?”
He nods again
And looks up at you
And he has the brightest, sparkliest puppy eyes as he looks at you 
Your heart goes BOOM BOOM BCS HE LOOKS SO CUTE AAA ╰(´⌣`)╯♡
“Let’s go home, Innie.”
420 notes · View notes
makoodlesarchive · 4 years
Text
bad dragon
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here i am delivering content that NO ONE ASKED FOR !! this is nasty and i got super embarrassed just writing it but i hope you enjoy it anyway
honestly no one look at me, just let me indulge in this in peace
pairing: kirishima eijirou x fem!reader
word count: 10k
warnings: blowjobs, penetrative sex, virgin kirishima, lots of cum (like, a ridiculous amount), breeding (kinda), size kink?. it’s not exactly anthro bc everyone is human here but uhh non-standard genitals, i guess? kirishima has an unusual dick: pls see here for reference      OR     check out the amazing fanart for kiri’s dick !!
Tip Jar!
  dragon dick kiri masterlist!
                            »»————- ♡ ————-««
Kirishima Eijirou was a perfect gentleman. He bought you flowers, he opened doors for you, he gave the sweetest goodnight kisses, he ate you out so good he had you seeing stars. You had the biggest, fattest crush on him, and you would be embarrassed about it if it weren’t for the fact that it seemed, at least for the most part, to be reciprocated.
The problem was Kirishima never let you touch him.
Whenever the two of you ended up in bed together, with the door firmly locked behind you, Kirishima insisted on sliding under the blankets and eating you out so enthusiastically he had your legs shaking in no time. It’s not like you would ever complain about that, but it definitely bothered you that he was never up for doing anything else. You would see the blanket shifting around as he jerked himself off furiously under the sheets as he tongue-fucked you, but whenever you tried to coax him out from beneath the sheets you were turned down with a soft, apologetic little smile.
You figured it must have something to do with his apparent commitment issues. Everytime you brought up the possibility of being a couple, or anything more than what you currently were (which, tragically, was nothing; just two friends occasionally getting hot and heavy) he brushed you off or changed the subject with a beautifully sunny smile and a laugh, so bright and cheery that you were successfully diverted every single time.
And it was fine, really. You liked Kirishima a lot, so you were totally willing to put up with a few odd idiosyncrasies. And okay, sure, if you were being totally honest with yourself, of course you wanted to be more than friends that flirt and kiss and mess around a bit. You couldn’t even technically call each other fuck buddies because he wouldn’t fuck you. But he was so sweet, and so handsome and kind and his tongue was so so good, that you would take whatever you could get from him. 
At least, that was until one afternoon.
April had brought with it blue skies and sun showers and warm breezes, and as the weather begins to improve your friends take to lounging out the front of the apartment complex. After graduating, renting places in the same neighbourhood just seemed like the next logical step. On days like this, where you all come together just to chill out in front of the complex, it seems like the best idea in the world. As you watch Kirishima chase Kaminari around the lawn, the two of them howling with laughter, something a little wistful twists in your stomach. It’s a familiar feeling, easy enough to shove away normally, but today for some reason you just feel… melancholy.
Maybe that’s why you do something you would never normally do. You turn to Bakugou, who’s aggressively chewing on candy as though it insulted his mother, and say, “Hey, um. Does Kirishima… does Kirishima ever talk about me?”
Bakugou’s jaw stills, and he turns his head very slowly to look at you. He looks mildly disbelieving, which is understandable. The two of you get along just fine, but you’ve never asked him anything personal before. “Why the fuck are you asking me that?” he demands through a mouthful of half-chewed toffee.
You shrug jerkily, suddenly mortified. Why are you asking something like that of Bakugou, of all people? “Never mind.” you say quickly, praying that he’ll just let it go and you can both move on and forget that you had ever asked such an embarrassing question.
A silence stretches between the two of you, long and taut, broken only by Mina giggling as she shows Sero something on her phone a few metres away. You could curse yourself for making things awkward between the two of you when you had been on relatively good terms, but then Bakugou turns to look at you so abruptly that you startle a little. “Look,” he says, jaw working absently as he chews his candy. “He likes you just fine, okay. Why aren’t you having this conversation with him, huh?”
You can’t quite meet Bakugou’s eyes. You don’t know how he can be so forthright all the time. “Um. I’ve tried, but he always changes the subject.”
Bakugou swears softly, glaring out across the lawn at Kirishima as he chases Kaminari, throwing grapes at his back. “I ain’t a relationship counsellor, okay? I get that it must be hard that he doesn’t cum when he’s with you or whatever, but you seriously need to work that out with him. What am I meant to do about it?”
“Right,” you wince, your body hot with embarrassment. Your mind sticks on something he just said though, and you turn back slowly to frown at him. “He… he doesn’t cum?”
“Hah?” Bakugou scowls at you, clearly annoyed that you’re still having this conversation. You’re not about to let up though, because you hadn’t known that.
“I-I didn’t realise that he didn’t-?” you trail off, mortified and horrified in equal measures. You had assumed all those times that he was jerking off under the sheets that he was getting himself off but just didn’t want you to see. You had never questioned the lack of mess because as soon as you were done he always left for the bathroom, returning a few minutes later with damp towels to clean you up with -- you had assumed he cleaned himself up in those moments of absence. How the fuck had you never noticed?  Why did Bakugou know when you didn’t? Oh god, had he and Kirishima talked about this?
Bakugou’s expression shifts as he apparently realises that he had just revealed something you hadn’t been aware of. “Oh.” he says, and his annoyance seems to have evaporated, only to be replaced by an intense discomfort. “Well. It’s not that big a deal, or whatever. I’m sure he still, uh, enjoys himself- fucking hell, can we stop talking about this?”
“Yeah.” you say a little numbly. You feel so stupid. Why had he never said anything to you? You had been under the assumption that he liked you back, but maybe you were totally mistaken. Maybe seeing your naked body turned him off to the point that he couldn’t actually cum even if hidden under the sheets and not looking at you. Maybe he never actually wanted to do any of that with you in the first place. There’s a stinging pressure building in the back of your eyes, and you have to look down at your lap and blink hard to stop yourself from doing something stupid like bursting into tears in front of Bakgou -- you don’t think either of you would live that down. “Uh. I think I’m gonna head up to my room, I’m really tired.”
Bakugou’s eyes widened a little, “Wait, are you-”
“I’ll see you later,” you smile and try to keep your voice as normal as possible, but even you can hear how forced you sound. You stand quickly and brush yourself off before heading back inside; you have to consciously slow your pace so that it doesn’t look like you’re running away, because you really don’t put it past Bakugou not to chase you down for cutting him off like that.
You bump into Jirou on the stairs and babble out an apology, escaping back upstairs to your apartment before she can ask you if you’re okay. The last thing you need is an audience for your imminent breakdown, but thankfully you don’t see a single other person on the way to your place. You shut the door to your room tight and lean your forehead against it to take a deep breath. It doesn’t do much to calm you down, so you turn and make a beeline straight for the bed. Throwing yourself dramatically on top of your bed covers feels a little cathartic, so you allow yourself the luxury of being dramatic as you bury your face into your arms and sigh. 
God, you wish Kirishima would have just talked to you instead of grinning that stupidly bright smile of his and changing the subject anytime you tried to talk or ask about the thing the two of you had together. At least then you would have been able to deal with any upset that may have been caused by that conversation by yourself, and you wouldn’t have had to get all upset in front of one of Kirishima’s best friends. God, how were you ever gonna look at Bakugou again?
You know that stewing by yourself like this isn’t going to help sort this situation out, but you just can’t find the energy to start thinking about what you’re going to do next. You don’t want to start thinking about that at all. You just need some time to yourself, just a little while to relax and breathe and just not think because if you start thinking you’re pretty sure you’re going to cry. You feel impossibly stupid.
When you hear a knock coming from the door, you want to bang your head off the wall. You can’t imagine anything worse than having to talk to someone and pretend that everything is fine right now.
“Y/N? Hey, is everything alright? Bakugou said you ran off.”
Aw, shit. Maybe you can imagine something worse.
You sit up sharply, staring at the door. This was so typical. Of all the people in the building, Kirishima is the last person you want to talk to right now. So of course it stands to reason that he would be the one to follow you straight to your apartment. “Everything’s fine,” you call back quickly, trying hard to sound like you meant it, “Hey, I’m just tired right now. Can we talk later?”
“Bakugou said you were upset.”
That traitor. You clench your jaw and scowl at the wall. “I’m-”
“I’m coming in, okay?”
“Wha-?” you stand up quickly, but Kirishima is already coming in and closing the door behind him. “Kirishima, I don’t-”
“Okay look, Bakugou said you were upset with me and I’m really, really sorry,” Kirishima blurts quickly, hands up in the air as if he’s being held at gunpoint, “He’s actually pretty annoyed at me right now, but he’s right, and-”
“I’m not-” you start, then pause to gather your thoughts. Bakugou was right, especially when he said you had to talk. And it was important this time that you didn’t let Kirishima divert you like he had been doing. “It’s not that I’m upset with you. Not really. I just- what are we even doing?”
“What do you mean?” he asks, so softly that it’s almost a whisper.
“I-” you swallow hard, brace yourself, “I really like you. I like spending time with you, and I’ve told you, or at least tried to, that I’d really like to, well, be- um, be more than whatever this is. And obviously I would totally get if you don’t want that, a relationship and stuff, but I want you to just tell me! Just say it, instead of changing the subject.”
“Wait, baby, please.” Kirishima steps forward quickly and stops just short of touching you, a bare few inches between you. “I like you so much, I never wanted you to feel this way. I just- it’s difficult to explain-”
“Do you...” you start to say, then sigh. You can’t believe you’re actually going to ask this, because it makes you sound so desperate, but you really need to hear him say it, “Do you not find me attractive?”
Kirishima makes a startled choking sound, “Wha-? Are you kidding? I find you so attractive! You’re so pretty, and your body is- is really nice, why would you think-”
“You never look at me when we’re in bed and-” you start fidgeting, horribly awkward. “I just want to be able to touch you.”
Kirishima steps forward, closing the distance between you and dropping to one knee. “Baby, I’ll do whatever you want,” he says, his hands coming to rest on your hips as his thumbs stroke circles into your skin. “You want me to touch you?”
“No.” you squeeze your eyes shut in frustration, realising that he had misunderstood. “I mean. Bakugou told me that you never cum when we’re together.”
When you open your eyes again, you see that Kirishima has gone stock still. His mouth is a little open, and you can see his throat working as he seems to fight for something to say. Very slowly, he gets back to his feet. “He shouldn’t have said that.”
You stare at him, at a loss. “Is it because-” you start, then trail off as you realise that you don’t even know what you’re trying to ask. You just want him to start talking so that you can stop asking all these stupid questions. “If you don’t want to have sex with me, you only have to say so, I would never pressure you into-”
“No!” Kirishima blurts, jolting forward. The suddenness of the movement seems to startle the both of you, but Kirishima recovers faster. “God, no, that’s not what this is!”
“Then, why?” you whisper, thoroughly confused. You had hoped that talking it out would help get some answers, but if anything you’re even more confused and insecure than you had been before he came to your room. “Did I- I mean, if I’m doing something that’s-”
“It’s not you.” Kirishima interrupts, covering his eyes with one of his large palms and leaning away from you. His hand is trembling a little, almost imperceptibly. “It’s not you. It’s me.”
The statement hangs in the air between the two of you like it’s a tangible presence. You stare hard at Kirishima, but he doesn’t remove his hand from his face. He looks a bit like he’s going to be sick. “What do you mean?” you ask quietly.
You’re guessing that this is where you get the ‘You’re great and all but I’m just not ready for a relationship. It’s got nothing to do with you though, I need to work through my own stuff’ sort of speech, and you have to brace yourself for it. Instead, Kirishima says something that you had not prepared yourself to hear in the slightest.
“I’m sorry.” you say, a little bewildered. You’re certain that you heard that wrong. “Could you- could you say that again?”
A flush has begun to crawl steadily across Kirishima’s face, made all the more prominent by the contrast of his hand pressed to his eyes. His ears are so red that they blend right into his hair. “I said,” he says, then takes an inhale, “That you’ll break up with me if you see my dick.”
You don’t actually know how to begin replying to that. For one, breaking up would require you to be in a relationship, which is something that he has been avoiding for a while now. You decide to address the bigger problem first. “Why would I want to break up because of your dick? Why would you even think that? Do you think I’m that shallow?”
“It’s got nothing to do with you being shallow,” Kirishima says slowly. You get the impression that he’s measuring his words, and his uncharacteristic reticence has you on edge. “It’s just that- I’m not, well, normal.”
You stare at him, a little taken aback. Kirishima had always had some issues with self-confidence, ever since middle school, but you’d always thought he’d worked through that in UA. You had never heard him talk about himself like this. “What’s that supposed to mean? Eijirou, lots of people are self-conscious about what they have going on downstairs. It doesn’t mean-”
“No, you don’t get it,” he interrupts. His hands have started twisting up the hem of his shirt, wringing it out and wrinkling the material. He’s frowning, and clearly starting to get agitated. “It’s not that I’m self-conscious about it- well, I am self-conscious about it, I guess, but it’s for a reason! I mean it, it’s not exactly… standard.”
Your face scrunches up in a frown before you can stop it. Not standard? “You’re worried it’s too small?” You guess. Your gaze drops to the crotch of his pants, where he’s subconsciously folded his hands. “Too big?”
“Um.” Kirishima lets out a nervous little laugh, several octaves higher than normal. “Yeah, I guess. It’s… it looks weird.”
“Eijirou,” your voice is soft now, most of your frustration melted away by the sight of Kirishima’s anxious fidgeting, “We live in a world where physical mutations are the norm; you really don’t have anything to worry about.” You pause for a moment, but Kirishima doesn’t respond immediately. The silence builds, until you try to break it with a light-hearted, “How weird can it be, really?”
Kirishima’s throat works as he swallows hard, but he’s nodding so you at least know that he’s listening. When he does speak, his voice is so low that you have to lean closer to him to catch what he’s saying. “I just don’t want to ruin this.”
Your heart twists, and the last of your frustration straight up disappears. You take a breath to steady yourself, then step forward and place your hands gently on his chest. A tremor works its way up his spine at your touch, but you don’t remark on it. “Kirishima.” you say firmly, and when he looks up and makes eye contact you try to keep your gaze as strict as possible. “You really have no idea how much I like you, do you? God, I like you so much, it’s stupid. I’ve wanted to be with you for so long. I mean, even if you never wanted to have sex I would understand, so long as you talked to me about it. Your dick is not gonna stop me from liking you, idiot.”
The fear of rejection is still plain to see on Kirishima’s face, but there’s something lurking just underneath that looks like hope. “I’ve never… I’ve never been with anyone like that.”
“You haven’t?” you ask, genuinely surprised. Not only is Kirishima perfectly sweet, he’s also extremely attractive. As an up-and-coming sidekick in Fatgum’s hero agency, you knew that he had no shortage of admirers. Even before that, in UA, you knew there were always people who had their eyes on him. He was so bright, he was hard to miss. 
He laughs, scrubbing at his eyes with his knuckles. “Uh, no. I mean, I’m not totally inexperienced. I mean, I’ve done oral and stuff, and I think I’m actually pretty good at it-”
“You are definitely pretty good at it,” you chime in, nodding and trying not to laugh at the flush crawling up his neck.
“I enjoy it, too!” he says quickly, as though trying to reassure you, “I enjoy it a lot. But I’ve never- I mean, no one’s ever touched me like that.” You feel your mouth drop open in honest shock. A little part of you couldn’t help but feel reassured that it wasn’t you he had a problem with, but that was mostly drowned out by surprise. Kirishima rushes on before you can speak, as though trying to say his piece before he runs out of steam, “It’s not that I didn’t want to, it’s just that it’s never seemed worth the fallout. Especially with you. I’m happy with being with you in whatever way I can, and I don’t want my stupid dick to scare you off or-”
“Oh my god, Kirishima, stop,” you say, and this time you really can’t hold back your laugh. “Your stupid dick isn’t going to scare me off. God, I can’t believe this is why you never let me touch you.” you step closer and press a soft, close-mouthed kiss to his lips. You hadn’t realised just how tense Kirishima was until he relaxed a little into your touch, the stiffness in his shoulders easing out as he sighed into the kiss. You pull back just a little, just enough that you can give him a cheeky smile. “Want me to give you your first blowjob?”
Kirishima’s whole body tenses right back up as his eyes shoot wide in surprise. “What?” he squeaks out, his ears turning scarlet.
You take his hand in yours and tangle your fingers together, before tugging him gently towards the bed. “I want to,” you assure him quietly, “No matter what your dick looks like, okay?”
“Yeah, okay.” Kirishima says as he sits at the edge of the bed. He’s breathing a little faster now, either from excitement or nerves. You’re guessing it’s a bit of both, because he’s clinging on tight to your hand even though he looks like he’s about to bolt. When you hook your fingers around the waistband of his shorts, he catches one of your wrists with his free hand. “If you- you know, if you change your mind after seeing it, just know that I won’t be mad or anything.”
He’s so quiet and earnest that you feel your heart melt a little looking at his nervously hopeful eyes. You take your hand back and climb onto his lap, pushing your fingers into his wild mop of hair. It’s the first time you’ve ever been close with him like this -- usually he would give you a sweet, gentle kiss and then dive between your legs, always keeping a frustrating amount of distance between your lower halves. This time though, he doesn’t try to divert you away. His hands grip your hips tight, and he leans his head into your touch. “I wish you would stop expecting me to push you away.” you murmur into the side of his neck, peppering little kisses into his skin. Kirishima lets out the smallest, choked off sounding whine at that, and tilts his head so that the long line of his throat is exposed. You take the hint, and start trailing kisses all along the soft skin at the base of his neck. “I told you, and I meant it; I want to be with you.”
Strong arms wind their way around your back and pull you close until you’re sat right over Kirishima’s crotch. You don’t even think it was intentional on Kirishima’s part, but you won’t pass up the opportunity when it presents itself to you. His shorts are bulging a little right in the centre where he’s starting to get hard, and you lower yourself down so that you’re grinding over him. He gasps at the contact, and his hips jerk up into you. “Oh, shit. I want you, so badly.” he gasps, his forehead dropping down to rest on your shoulder.
You have to admit, what you can feel through his shorts is… intimidating. ‘Yeah, I guess,’ he had said when you asked him if he was worried about his dick being too big. Judging by what you could feel pressing against you, that was a massive understatement, and he was only half-hard. You ghost your hands down over his sides, feeling his ribs expand with his breaths, sliding down until your hands reach the waistband of his shorts again. You push them down over his hips, and he lifts himself up to help you, and then he’s just in his impressively tented jockstrap. You smile reassuringly at him as you tug down the jockstrap, and then his cock springs free of the waistband and you pause.
“Oh.” you breathe.
“I know that it’s-” Kirishima begins to visibly panic, his hand reflexively shooting down to try and cover himself as he tries to sit up.
“It’s okay.” you say quickly, recovering from your surprise as quickly as possible. You still feel a little off-kilter as you slide off his lap to your knees in front of him. You know that you’re staring at his cock wide-eyed, but you can’t quite help yourself. It’s… well. It’s definitely not standard.
You reach out, your hand hovering uncertainly over his cock because you barely know how to begin. It’s thicker than a soda can, and long. Delicate ridges and swirls decorate the underside, with a series of bumps along the top. When you finally do grasp him in your hand, you’re rewarded with a barely stifled gasp and a hot spurt of precum that dribbles down his cockhead to your fingers. You use both your hands to explore his length, fingers trailing over all those strange ridges. The bumps along the top are apparently sensitive, because when you rub your thumbs over them Kirishima gasps and his hips thrust gracelessly into the air.
“Sorry!” he blurts as his cock dribbles even more precum. There’s so much of it that it looks like you actually used lube or something to slick up his cock, but you guess that this must be normal for him because he just looks embarrassed. “I- it’s sensitive, I guess, um- I usually put down a towel, because I tend to get, uh, messy.”
The way he says that and the connotations of it has your thighs squeezing together, and you take a deep inhale through your nose. It’s unexpectedly hot. “Gotcha.” you smile at him, trying to put him at ease as you return your attention back to his dick. “Don’t worry about it. I don’t mind if you make a mess.”
“Oh, shit. Uh, okay.” Kirishima says, and his breathing has gotten noticeably heavier now. He’s almost panting as he leans back on his elbows, craning his neck so he can get a look at what you’re doing. There’s a curious swell around the base of his cock that just seems to be growing. One of your hands travels down to it curiously, splaying over it and then rubbing it at it experimentally. His hips rock forward sharply, a huff of breath leaving him as he grunts a muted, “Fuck!”
The precum is oozing almost continuously now, spilling over with nearly every stroke, and your rubbing at the swollen base seems to be pushing even more out. It’s obscene, the copious amount of it and the way it’s stringing down onto your hands. If this is the amount of precum he produces, you can hardly imagine the amount of cum he’s going to produce. You wonder if ‘messy’ is another understatement.
You finally lean forward and lick an experimental stripe up the underside of his cock, lapping at the ridges and swirls. The moan that’s ripped out of him is needy and so desperate -- his stomach muscles are tensed with the effort he’s putting in to keep from rocking into your mouth, but his cheeks are flushed and his own mouth is lolling open, his eyes squeezed shut. You take that as your cue to take all of him in your mouth as best as you can, suckling at the tip before swallowing him down. You get about halfway before you have to pull back and try again. Your mouth is stretched obscenely wide around the girth of him, and you swear you can feel the weight of his dick pulsing on your tongue.
“Oh god, oh baby, oh Y/N,” Kirishima is babbling nonsensically, his head thrown as his hips make the sweetest little aborted rocking motions, like he wants nothing more than to let go but is trying his best to restrain himself for your sake. “Feels so good.”
You suck him as best as you can, but your jaw is starting to ache from being hinged so wide. You alternate between stroking his length and suckling on the head of his dick, tracing the swirls and squeezing the bottom. The swell at the base of his cock has engorged even further, and you prod at it curiously with one hand as you work his length with the other. It’s firm but oddly spongey, and everytime you poke at it Kirishima’s whole cock twitches.
When he gasps out your name you pull back and look up at him. He’s trembling, his shirt rucked up past his bellybutton and his gaze fixed unwaveringly on you. “You okay?” you ask softly, rubbing your thumb along one of the ridges under the head of his dick.
“Yeah,” he breathes, reaching down to cup your face. His thumb swipes over your bottom lip, and you realise that a string of saliva and precum is dripping down your chin. “But if you keep going I’m gonna cum.”
“Isn’t that kind of the point?” you laugh, and press a kiss right on his slit. His hips twitch and you dodge backwards just in time to avoid him taking your eye out with his hard on. 
“Sorry!” he looks mortified, and you can’t help but find his nervous fumbling absolutely adorable.
“Don’t worry about it.” you smile as you kiss your way down his shaft, prepared now for the intermittent jerking of his hips. You get to that swollen part at the base and place your mouth right at the bottom of his cock, before wrapping your lips around it to the best of your ability and sucking.
You had guessed that this swollen area was sensitive thanks to his reactions earlier, but you’re not quite prepared for the shout he lets out or the way his hand grabs onto the side of your head as he damn near rides your mouth. You’re totally startled by the reaction, but given the amount of times that you’ve done the same to his mouth you’re only too happy to indulge him. Plus, it’s the first time you’ve ever seen Kirishima fall apart like this. His cock is dribbling precum at a rapid rate the more excited he gets, and thick strings of it are pouring onto your cheeks. You think you should probably feel a little grossed out, but seeing Kirishima open-mouthed and panting as he rides your face like he’s hasn’t got a single other thought in his mind has you so turned on that your panties are getting sticky and uncomfortable between your legs. You stick your own hand between your legs to try and relieve yourself of some of the heat coiling up in your stomach, but the way that Kirishima’s rutting into your face throws off your coordination.
“Oh god, please, baby, please, put it back in your mouth, I’m gonna- fuck, Y/N, I’m gonna cum, please-” He begs, his head thrown back as he gasps.
How could you ever deny him when he pleads like that? You pull your head out of his grasp and sink your mouth back down on his cock, and then you just hold there and breathe as steadily as you can as Kirishima’s cock throbs in your mouth. His hips spasm, pushing his cock further into your throat. It almost feels like he’s getting bigger, as if he’s growing down your throat.
Kirishima is still babbling, a steady stream of senselessness about how good you’re making him feel, how beautiful you are, how lucky he is, until he cuts himself off with a gasp of “Baby, I’m- I’m-” and then he’s silent, his mouth hanging open as his whole body strains.
You try to suck him through his orgasm, but you are utterly unprepared for the sheer quantity of cum that erupts from his dick. Despite your intentions, you have no choice but to pull off his cock, choking a little on the cum that actually managed to get up your nose. You stroke him through it, feeling dazed as you watch him cum. You know it’s dripping from your chin, running in rivulets down your face. You wonder if it’s coming out your nose.
Kirishima seems to come forever, humping into your fist and whining and moaning the whole time. When his cock finally gives its last, exhausted spurt, his body falls limp against the bed. He’s gasping for breath and staring at the ceiling, looking like his soul had been ejected from his body along with the insane amount of cum. You notice the swollen part at the base of his cock has deflated almost entirely, to the point that it’s hardly noticeable anymore.
You climb up on the bed beside him and nudge him with your knee, a little concerned. “Eijirou? You good?”
When he looks at you, there’s a goofy smile splitting his face. “I have never been so good in my whole life.” His smile freezes as he catches a proper look at your face, caught between surprise, embarrassment, and something else. He reaches out to your face and swipes his fingers through the mess on your face. “Oh god, I’m so sorry-”
“Don’t be!” you hasten to assure him, squeezing his wrists. “It was the hottest thing I’ve ever seen!”
Kirishima stares at you as though he almost doesn’t believe you, but his cum is painted across your face and dripping down your chest, so he’s not in the best position to argue. “I told you I tend to get messy.” he breathes out a laugh, and then leans forward to kiss you, apparently not caring about the taste of his own ejaculate.
You hum into his mouth, your thighs clenching in excitement. “Eijirou,” you whisper into the kiss. When he pulls back, you bite your lip and smile at him, “Next time, will you fuck me?”
Kirishima inhales sharply, and his grip on your hips tightens to the point that the pressure is near bruising. “You really want that?”
“God, yes.” you blurt, shifting so that you’re straddling his stomach. You lower yourself down so that you’re grinding against his bare skin, and you can see the exact moment that he realises you’ve soaked through your panties.
He groans, and pulls at your hips to encourage you to grind against his stomach harder. “Shit, sweetheart. You don’t think it’s… kind of gross?”
“I didn’t expect the amount of cum,” you confess, wiping at your face with a helpless laugh, “But no, I don’t think it’s gross. I like it.” You whimper as Kirishima’s thumb slides over your swollen clit, the glide made smooth thanks to the slickness of your own arousal.
Kirishima is looking up at you as though you had hung the moon, and it’s hard not to get a little embarrassed under the intensity of his gaze. “Okay,” he whispers, “If you’re sure.” He glances down with a small frown, his lips twisted thoughtfully, “I don’t want to hurt you, though.”
“You won’t.” you kiss his nose, grinning as it wrinkles up under your lips. “We’ll make sure I’m stretched.” you glance over your shoulder at his still wet, softening cock. Even now, the size of it is intimidating. “And lube,” you conclude, “We’ll use lots and lots of lube.”
“Yeah,” he breathes, a smile starting to light up his face. He presses a sloppy kiss to the base of your throat, and you can feel the smile against your skin, “Yeah, okay. I’d really like that.” There’s still cum everywhere, all over your hands and chest and face and splashed across Kirishima’s legs and stomach, but he doesn’t seem to care about the mess in the slightest as he rolls the two of you over so that he’s hovering over you. The kiss he presses to one of your breasts is impossibly soft, and you tilt your head back and sigh as you feel his fingers trace over the lips of your pussy. “I’m so lucky to have you.” he whispers, then pushes himself down your body.
As his tongue flicks over your clit, you smile. It’s definitely you that’s the lucky one here.
_________________________
Kirishima’s complicated relationship with his genitalia had started in middle school. Up until that point, he had managed to remain blissfully unaware that there was any kind of abnormality in his nether regions. That changed one day in the locker rooms.
Having never paid any particular attention to what he had in his pants, Kirishima hadn’t thought anything of changing out with the rest of the boys in his class, as unabashed as any middle-schooler that hadn’t developed a sense of self-consciousness yet. He didn’t notice the whispers or stares until one of his friends nudged him hard. “Dude,” he said, glancing between Kirishima’s legs and then away, curiosity and mild revulsion mingled on his face, “What’s wrong with your thingy?”
“Wrong?” Kirishima had echoed, discomfort beginning to prickle beneath his skin. He hadn’t realised there was anything wrong with his genitals. He covered up quickly and finished getting changed, but the stares lingered.
No one said anything more about it to him, but by the end of the day rumour had spread that Kirishima was weird down there.
He had, like so many boys his age, taken to the internet to do his own research. It felt like a punch to the gut when he realised that his classmates were right -- his dick looked nothing like the dicks that all the guys in the videos he found had. There were exceptions, where the person’s genitals were affected by their quirk, but they were always full-body quirks that made it pretty obvious that what you were gonna find down below would be non-standard. His genitals didn’t match his body or his quirk, so his classmates must be right when they say that he’s weird with those grossed-out little laughs.
He learned pretty quickly to keep that part of him to himself, to change out quickly and efficiently in such a way that no one would ever see the parts of him that he’d rather keep hidden. He welcomes physical contact because he’s still an affectionate guy, but he’s always careful about the distance he allows between himself and others just in case they brush up against him accidentally and somehow feel that he’s different. When the boys in his class start excitedly talking about girls and other boys, and how nice it’d be to have a girlfriend or boyfriend, Kirishima tries to stay out of it. He doesn’t want to wonder about something like that when he knows that if someone were to find out his secret they’d be totally grossed out.
High school comes hand in hand with experimentation though, and Kirishima is lonely and touch-starved. He doesn’t want to avoid touch for the rest of his life out of fear that someone’s going to know. So he allows himself to indulge a little; he’s popular with girls in UA, a fact that surprises him. Unlike the girls in middle school, they haven’t heard the rumours that there’s something wrong with him, so they smile and chat to him and even flirt. It’s exciting and new and he allows himself to have just this -- he kisses them and he makes them feel good, and then he retreats when they look for more because he just can’t give it to them. 
When he tells you all this, you could swear that you feel your heart crack right down the middle. You hadn’t realised how lonely Kirishima was, wrapped up in a self-constructed blanket of self-loathing and disgust. You knew it had taken a lot of trust for him to open up to you like he had, but you hadn’t realised just how much. It makes your chest fill with some undefinable emotion, and you just want to hold him and never let go. 
You’re more determined than ever now to show him exactly how much you care about him, and exactly how much any physical anomaly doesn’t affect the way you feel in the slightest. You’ve been stretching yourself methodically and carefully every night of the week that has passed since you gave him his first blowjob in preparation to finally have sex with him. You just want him to feel good, and you don’t want him to worry about hurting you. And now, tonight, you’ve decided that you’re ready for it.
Bakugou’s the one that answers the door when you knock at their shared apartment, and his face does something funny when he sees you. He lets you in without a greeting, and yells for Kirishima as you shut the door behind you. It’s definitely a little awkward, because your last proper conversation was that day when he told you that your now boyfriend didn’t get off when you were together, but you smile and ask him how he’s doing all the same.
He just grunts at you and sprawls out on the couch, his attention fixed on his phone. You don’t try to make any further conversation, because you figure he probably won’t respond and you can hear Kirishima crashing around further down the hall anyway. You’re about to slip down the hall towards Kirishima’s room when Bakugou speaks again, surprising you. “You talked.”
You pause, confused for half a moment before the memories of your last conversation come flooding back. “Oh. Uh, yeah, we did.” 
Bakugou nods, still staring at his phone. You hover uncertainly, unsure of whether you should continue to Kirishima’s room or if Bakugou had something else he wanted to say. You don’t have to wait long; Bakugou puts his phone down and turns to survey you closely. “If you’re still here, then I guess you didn’t freak out.”
“There’s nothing to freak out over.” you say defensively, thinking of how sensitive Kirishima is about his body.
“I never said there was!” Bakugou snaps back instantly. You both glare at each other, but you don’t respond further. You came here for one reason, and that reason was not to start a fight with Bakugou when your boyfriend was waiting for you in the bedroom. When Bakugou speaks again, it’s with an awkward edge to his voice. “Whatever. Just don’t be an asshole to him.”
You realise that Bakugou is just trying to look out for his friend, and the revelation that you’re receiving Bakugou’s awkward attempt at a shovel talk is enough to have you reeling. “As if I would be,” you say, “I really like him.”
“Good. Fine.” Bakugou picks his phone back up and you take that as a dismissal. You’re just about to leave when he says, “By the way, keep it the fuck down. I don’t care if you’re taking dragon dick or if it’s Shitty Hair’s first time getting his dick wet, I don’t need to hear that nasty shit.”
His crudeness has you flushing hot with embarrassment, but you don’t dignify him with a response. You slip down the hall and up to Kirishima’s bedroom, knocking softly on the door before letting yourself in.
Kirishima is in the process of trying to stuff a pile of clothes into the bottom of his wardrobe, and he slams the door shut and whirls around when he hears you come in. “Hey!” he beams at you, trying to kick aside the pair of underwear that’s stuck in the edge of the wardrobe door.
“Hey, you.” you greet him. You’re still a bit flustered from Bakugou’s comment, but you hide it as best as you can as Kirishima sweeps you up in his arms and pulls you into a sweet, close-mouthed kiss.
In the week since you blew him the first time, the two of you have alternated between your apartments and spent almost every single day together. Some days you just touched each other with your hands, other days you used your mouths on each other. You still hadn’t gotten fully used to his enormous loads of cum, but he seems at least to be getting more and more comfortable with your touch. Even now, his hands trail up your sides as he presses eagerly into you; this boldness would have been unheard of coming from him only a week ago, but neither of you are under any illusions about what the two of you are going to get up to this evening.
You wind your arms around his neck and melt into the kiss, relishing the contact and the wet slide of his lips against yours. As his hands trail from your hips to your lower back to your ass, you feel the hard press of his lower abdomen nudge against you. You pull back and grin at him, “Someone’s impatient.”
Kirishima flushes, but he doesn’t pull away or deny it. Progress. “I’ve been thinking about you all day.” he confesses quietly, reaching up to nudge a flyaway tuft of hair out of your eyes.
“Yeah?” you grin, delighting in his openness. You take a small step back and look down at where his bulge is tenting the front of his sweatpants. “How long have you been like this, baby?”
“Pretty much since you texted me telling me you were thinking of coming over.” he says with a cheeky little smile, nudging his face into your neck and nipping at the skin there. “So, an hour and a half? Give or take.”
You hum as you cup his hardness through the cotton of his joggers. He groans and his hips jerk into your palm, as sensitive as ever. “Hey,” you murmur, “Wanna fuck me?”
Kirishima’s whole body twitches at that, and you swear you can feel his cock jump in his hand. “Now?” he asks, his voice gone a little hoarse from surprise and arousal.
“Unless you’d like to wait?”
“No! Now is good!” Kirishima says hastily, reaching out to hold your hips as though he’s afraid you’ll disappear. “God, now is so good.”
It’s really hard to hold back your laugh as you watch him scramble towards the bed, tugging you along with him. He’s excited, that much is obvious, and you really can’t blame him -- he’s gone so long thinking that he would never get to have this, that he would never be accepted like this. You want to give him everything.
His hands start fidgeting with the sheets as soon as he sits back on the bed. You straddle his lap and take his hands in yours before leaning in for a kiss, hoping to distract him from any nerves or self-doubts before they can take a hold of him. He hums happily into your mouth, squeezing one of your hands in his and using the other one to wrap around your waist and pull you closer.
“I’ve thought about sex with you so many times,” you admit when you pull away from the kiss. You reach up and stroke a line down the bridge of his nose, then push back a lock of his hair; it’s freshly washed and ungelled, lying fluffy and loose around his face. He’s looking up at you like you just hung the moon, open-mouthed and soft-eyed. It’s such a sweet look on him, and you love watching it contort into pleasure as you sink down to rub yourself against his hard on. “I want you to feel good.”
Kirishima makes a choked off whining sound in his throat as he grinds up into you. “You always make me feel good.” he says. You can feel his cock thickening and filling out against you, and judging by how clearly you can feel him, he’s foregone the usual jockstrap or protective cup he uses to try and hide his shape in his pants. 
You reach down and pull at his sweatpants -- you manage to get one leg off entirely, but the other gets stuck halfway down his left thigh and you’re too impatient to keep pulling at it so you just abandon it in favour of reaching for Kirishima’s now exposed cock. You’ve gotten familiar with the thick ridges and bumps of it over the past week, familiar enough for your fingers to seek out his sensitive spots without even looking.
He moans as you touch him, and dips his hands into your pants so that he can squeeze at your ass. His grip is a little too hard, bordering on painful as he bites at your neck. He pops open the button on your pants and shoves one of his hands into your panties, rubbing at your clit with his thumb and trailing his other fingers along your slit. 
You rub at the bumps along the tip of his cock, and you’re rewarded with a little squirt of precum. It dribbles down your hand and onto the sheets, and you wonder if maybe you should put down some towels to try and keep the mess contained. But Kirishima is letting out the softest little moans as he tries to rut into your hand and rub at your clit at the same time, and you decide that ruining the moment to lay down towels just isn’t worth it. A little mess is a small sacrifice to make.
When his fingers finally dip inside you, you feel his whole body tense up and still. “Baby,” he says, his voice soft and a little stunned, “You..”
“I stretched myself out before I came over,” you finish for him, pushing your hips back so that his fingers sink all the way inside of you. The lube still inside of you makes the slide effortless, and the look on Kirishima’s face is absolutely priceless. “I’m ready when you are.”
Those words elicit another little spurt of precum as Kirishima’s cock twitches in your hand. When you glance down, you see that the base of his dick is engorged and painful looking, and it only seems to be swelling. You only get to look for a moment though, because then you’re being flipped on your back and Kirishima is looming over you. “Oh, baby, oh shit,” he grits out through clenched teeth as his cock rubs up against the back of your thighs. “Are you sure you want to?”
“I want to, I want to so bad,” you promise him, kissing where you can reach on his face. You reach down and grip his cock, guiding it to your entrance, “Go slow, baby.” You’re so excited when you first feel the tip of his cock press into you that you’re not sure if the gush of wetness is from your pussy or his precum. You’re so turned on that you wonder if the amount of lube you had used was overkill, but then the length of him starts to stretch you out and you decide that yes, you absolutely did need that lube.
As soon as the tip is in, Kirishima stills over you. His head drops down, forehead making contact with your shoulder as he groans. You rock your hips experimentally, your breathing gone a little ragged as you realise that you can feel all those fleshy bumps and ridges, but Kirishima snatches at your hips instantly to still you. When he speaks, his voice is strained, “I’m not gonna last.”
Affection bubbles up in your chest as you look at his flushed face, his misty eyes. He’s practically trembling from the effort of holding back. “It’s okay,” you assure him, looping your arms over his shoulders and tracing little patterns into the skin of his back, “You don’t have to, it’s your first time. We have all the time in the world to go again and again, as many times as you want.”
Kirishima makes a garbled little noise in the back of his throat, and then he’s kissing you so sloppily and enthusiastically that drool begins to slip down your chins. It’s a little gross, but considering how much cum you’re going to be covered in soon enough you can’t be too fussy. When he pulls back, it’s so that he can look down and watch where his cock is entering you in increments.
The slow, inexorable stretch of it has your breath catching in your throat. You throw your head back on the bed and focus on keeping your breathing as steady as possible as he presses into you so, so slowly. After exploring the length of him with your mouth and hands, you knew he was big, but apparently knowing and feeling are two completely separate things. You feel like you’re being stretched impossibly wide, and when you glance down you see that he’s not even halfway in. 
Kirishima pauses suddenly, his breathing coming in short pants. You think that he’s just taking a moment to collect himself, to pace himself, but he’s frowning down at where the two of you are connected. “I dont- I don’t think I’ll fit.”
“Oh, you’ll fit.” you declare, jaw set stubbornly. His dick was already partly in you, and like hell were you giving up now. “Don’t worry. Keep going, Eiji.”
“You’re so…” he groans as he edges his hips forward, rocking his cock another inch inside of you, “So tight, you feel so wet and warm inside, oh god, so good, so good.”
The stretch is starting to sting, but you’ve prepared yourself well for this and it’s not so bad that you can’t breathe through it. When he bottoms out inside you, the tip of his cock hits your cervix and your whole body jerks hard at the dull ache it sends up your spine. “Fuck!” you cry out, your hips humping back into Kirishima’s of their own accord. You can feel every damn ridge and swirl grinding against your insides, and you clamp down hard around him, gasping. “Oh, shit.”
You’ve never felt so full in your life, and Kirishima’s cock doesn’t even fit all the way inside you. You wonder if you’re about to split in two. Your thighs are splayed obscenely wide, and you can feel your own body trying to suck him in further but there’s nowhere else to go because he’s filling you up so completely. Your chest is heaving as you pant for breath -- your thoughts have turned a little muddy, but even now you can see that Kirishima has frozen, his face tucked into your neck as he shudders with deep, panting breaths. Your shoulder feels wet, and you realise that he’s drooling on you.
“Eijirou,” you groan, “Move.”
His first thrust is hesitant, exploratory. He apparently likes what he feels, because he lifts his head up so that he can look at you properly. He looks totally blissed out, his eyes a little unfocused, and his expression alone shoots a bolt of heat straight between your legs. You breathe out a curse and move your hips down and into him, trying to encourage him to fuck you properly. When he thrusts forward again, the movement is accompanied by a vulgar squelching sound, and you realise that you’re probably being filled up with his precum. The thought makes you moan quietly, tightening up around him. 
Kirishima grunts and dives down so that your chests are pressed together, his arms pushing your legs up and to the side, and then suddenly he’s fucking into you for real. His moans sound like they’ve come straight out of a porn video as he shoves his cock as deep inside you as possible before pulling out and doing it again. All you can do is gasp against him as the breath is driven straight out of your lungs by his desperate humping.
His movements are nearly feral, jackhammering into you at a pace that probably should feel punishing but instead has you hiccuping out moans on every stroke. The size of him and the speed at which he’s fucking at you is overwhelming in the best possible way. He keeps gasping your name in between moans, his jaw lolling open as he pants for breath. “Oh, baby girl, you feel so good, so good for me. You like this?”
“Yes!” you wheeze, clinging to his shoulders as he rails you into the mattress. It’s better than you ever could have hoped for, and you’re nearly sobbing from the sheer sensation of it all. “Oh god, don’t stop!” You feel your abdomen drawing tight, heat beginning to build rapidly in the bottom of your belly, and you practically throw yourself down to meet his thrusts. “Please, I’m gonna cum, make me cum, Eiji!”
Kirishima practically snarls at that, his hand snaking down to your pussy even as he keeps rutting into you. His hand finds your clit and starts stroking at it hard and fast at a pace that matches his fucking. “Fuck yes, I wanna feel you cum on my cock.”
You know you’re starting to shake apart, his cock and his fingers too much for you. Your body is strung taut, your orgasm so close you can virtually taste it. As he feels you clamp down around him Kirishima lets out a whimpering moan, and with that you’re totally gone, head slamming back on the bed as you let out mindless, breathless little choking moans. It feels like your vision totally wipes out as you convulse in Kirishima’s arms, hips twitching wildly. 
When the euphoria of your orgasm finally subsides, you feel so totally fucked out that you hardly know which way is up. It takes you a moment to become aware of the way Kirishima is humping into you desperately now, hunkering over you and groaning. Feeling his cock slide in and out of your over-sensitive and still twitching pussy is almost too much, and you know you won’t be able to take much more of his relentless pounding. You clench around him as tight as you can and cup his sweaty face in your hands, smiling at the open-mouthed look of pure need he’s giving you. “Are you gonna cum inside me, Eiji?”
Apparently that was the correct thing to say, because you can see the moment that he hurtles completely over the edge. He shoves his cock as deep as he can get inside you and then he’s crying out as he begins to empty himself inside you. He keeps rocking, even though his cock is crammed as far into you as it’s possible to get, and you tremble and gasp as you feel his cum spraying inside you. It feels totally filthy, and there’s so much of it that you can feel it leaking out and down your ass even though Kirishima’s cock is still plugging you up. There’s so much cum that you actually start to wonder if your birth control is going to still be effective. You almost expect it to start coming out of your ears.
It seems like he’s cumming forever, and eventually he has to pull out because you’re just too full. As soon as his gradually softening cock is pulled free, it seems like a veritable bucketload of cum streams out of you and makes a mess of the bedcovers. It’s simultaneously really gross and really, really hot, and you don’t have the energy to unpack that so you just lay back and watch as Kirishima’s cock continues to dribble cum all over his legs and your abdomen. The swollen base of his cock is deflated now, and his dick eventually gives one last twitch and then he’s finished. 
He collapses on top of you, sweaty and soiled with his cum, but you don’t complain as he wraps you up in his arms and kisses your temples, murmuring soft, mindless praise into your hairline. “Are you okay?” he whispers, “Did I hurt you?”
You laugh a little, still winded. Your pussy is feeling achey from being stretched so wide, and you’re definitely going to have trouble walking tomorrow, but it’s the best kind of hurt imaginable. “You did everything just right.” you say, giving him a tired smile. “How was it?”
“If I could stay in your pussy forever, I would.” he says solemnly, the barest hint of a smile pulling at his lips.
You laugh properly at that, and roll over so that you’re lying across his chest. “Yeah? Well, I think you’ve just ruined me for all other cocks in the world. No one's ever gonna compare to how good yours feels.”
With your chin on his chest, you have a clear view of the way he flushes at your words, and the vulnerability that creeps into his expression as he looks at you. “Really?”
“I just came so hard it felt like the world was ending.” you grin at him, then press a teasing kiss to one of his pecs. “Yes, really.”
A smile breaks out on his face, toothy and dorky, as if he can’t believe his luck. “So… Would you want to do it again, maybe? Sometime?”
The smile you return is so wide it feels like it’s about to split your face. “Yeah, Eiji. Without question.”
It’s hard to kiss when you’re both grinning like total idiots, but the two of you make a valiant effort all the same. The ridiculous amount of cum painting the two of you is beginning to dry and flake off your skin, and it's definitely kind of gross but you’re so happy and sated and tired in that moment that you’re pretty sure nothing on earth could ruin the moment for you. Not even Bakugou when he comes pounding at the door and yelling obscenities in the form of noise complaints.
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faithinthefuture28 · 4 years
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Larry songs timeline & what it tells us about the evolution of their relationship
**These are all just my interpretations but the more I listen to the music they wrote, the more it all fits together. ESPECIALLY BECAUSE THROUGHOUT THE YEARS THEY’VE BEEN TALKING ABOUT WRITING “AUTOBIOGRAPHICALLY” AND “FROM PERSONAL EXPERIENCE”
I deffo missed some songs but these stood out to me:
2013
L-Strong: Love isn’t easy (waves trying to break it) but what we have means something and it’s worth fighting for. read: love is only for the brave (Think of how much love that’s been wasted...there’s nothing i’m running from...i don’t care, I’m not scared of love) And we bring out the best in each other so lets not throw this away (i’d do anything to save it...when i’m not with you i’m weaker). 
H-Happily: I want to fight for us too bc we’re on fire and our love is powerful af. ik we have to do stunts and stuff (and if (s)he feels my traces in your hair, sorry love but I don’t really care) but what we have is insane and fuck everyone else bc you’re MINE and i’m YOURS at the end of the day (i wanna be the one who holds you when you sleep). Together, we’re magic so just be with me so happily
H-Something Great: ****this song is very straightforward so i won’t explain it much***** (i want you here with me like how i pictured it so i dont have to keep imagining... We’re better off together here tonight). Written as a longing for what could be if they dont have to suppress the relationship. (script was written...want to rip it all to shreds) Louis’ response (you’re all I want so much it’s hurting) basically says “it’s not too much to ask babe, i want it too.” This has the kind of longing that ‘wouldn’t it be nice- beach boys’ which Harry has admitted is kind of a theme song. 
L-Through the Dark: I know all this bs we’re going through is taking a toll on you and hurts you and i hate seeing you upset (you tell me that your sad...you tell me that you’re hurt and youre in pain and i can see your head is held in shame...i just wanna see you smile again) but I will do everything physically possible to protect you from any pain bb (i’d never let you fall and break your heart, if u wanna cry or fall apart, i’ll be there to hold ya). We’re going through this together and I will take on any responsibility needed to keep you happy.  I’M WILLING TO GO THROUGH HELL TO FIGHT FOR US HARRY LOVE (entire chorus basically).
L-Better than Words: holy fuck our love is amazing can’t even describe it can i just sing to you foreva love u babycakes
L-Why don’t we go there: what if...we just forgot about the world and escaped and enjoyed each others love and rode the high??? Also sex
2014
L-Ready to Run: *******Followup to Why Don’t We Go There*********** But this time let’s escape for real bc (there’s me inside a sinking boat running out of time). Like i’m ready to get out of here and it could just be us living happily ever after (this time i’m ready to run). Honestly nothing else makes sense (without you i’ll never make it out alive...wherever you are is the place i belong). I know what i want out of life and IT’S YOU HARREH (i want to be free and i wanna be yours, i will never look back). 
L-Steal My Girl: all u thirsty hoes find someone else bc Harry is MY pretty princess. Srsly ask his family. But you can still admire how he looks in those jeans. We all do. You know the ones
L-No Control: boy u fine, let’s do what lovers do IN THE MORNING. bc we can. also you own me and i am urs
L-Clouds: WE KNEW THIS WAS GONNA BE HARD SO WHY ARE YOU BEING A LITTLE BITCH (you dont like it complicated...but love is never ever simple...you are tired of all the changes, but love is always always changing). We could be great yo, just keep fighting (if we’re never coming back down, we’ll looking down on the clouds...we go and we go and we dont stop)
H-Where do Broken Hearts Go: IM SORRY LOU BABY YOURE EVERYTHING (rest of my crimes dont come close the look on your face when i let you go... the taste of your lips...is at the top of the list of things i want). H&L’s call and  response at the end is basically forgiveness and acknowledgment (come on baby come and get me out, come on baby cuz i need you now)
H-Two Ghosts: *****was written around this time according to Harry******. This is fucking hard yo. We’re drained and exhausted and idk how much more we can fight for this... (it’s not you and it’s not me...sounds like something that i used to feel). That infatuation and electricity and hope that fueled our younger selves isn’t really there anymore and i’m just tired man (we’re just two ghosts swimming in a glass half empty, trying to remember how it feels to have a heartbeat, we’re not who we used to be...this was all we used to need). We’re empty vessels going through the motions (same eyes blue, couple more tattoos). AND WE AREN’T FUCKING COMMUNICATING (we dont say what we really mean). 
2015
H&L-Perfect: so what if... we get rid of the pressure of forever? What if we just have fun doing the stupid shit we love and makes us feel alive (trouble up in hotel rooms, secret little rendezvous, things you know that we shouldn’t do). Like we won’t be out of each others’ lives, I’m still around and we can find comfort in each other and even mess around here and there (I can be the one you love from time to time). Remember how we used to be young and EXCITED (when i first saw you from across the room, i could tell that you were curious) let’s get that energy back without the responsiblity of an adult relationship. And we can keep making art lmao (if youre looking for someone to write your breakup songs about). 
L-Long Way Down *****this song fkn hurts man. It’s overlooked a lot but shows so much insight**** We were...everything. And maybe that’s the problem? We’ve been through so fucking much, more than anyone our age should have to endure. (We've been in fire, Went down in the flames. We sailed the ocean And drowned in the waves. Built a cathedral But we never prayed) We didn’t know what we had. We were damn kids man. We weren’t prepared for all this. We didn’t know how powerful this would be. We didn’t know what it required of us. (We had a mountain But took it for granted. We had it all yeah. Who could’ve planned it). We didn’t know what to do with it, how to deal with it, so here we are. (We had a spaceship But we couldn't land it) We’re each other’s everything, but we can’t keep going on like this babe. (We found an island But we got stranded). I don’t want to leave you but being together is breaking us down. (Point of no return and now It's just too late to turn around) We thought we were untouchable. That love conquers all. Maybe, we were wrong. This is gonna hurt like a bitch (We built it up so high and now I'm fallin', it’s a long way down)
H-Olivia: I LIVE FOR YOU, I LONG FOR YOU, I LOVE YA. And i think i’ll always love ya. And I’m scared...of life without you (i get the feeling you’re walking out, time is irrelevant when i’ve not been seeing you, the consequences are falling now, there’s something i’m having nightmares about...dont let me go). But maybe just maybe thats okay, because you’re AIMH (you live in my imagination...i love you, it’s all i do). 
L-Love you Goodbye: I fucking love you and I’ll always fucking love you but i think this is the right thing to do even though it feels so wrong (i know there’s nothing i can do to change it, but is there something that can be negotiated?) We made some goddamn fireworks together though (unforgettable together held the whole world in our hands) and do ya maybe think...we can make them just once more? (if tomorrow you wont be mine, let me give it to you one last time, baby let me love you goodbye...one more taste of your lips just to bring me back to the places we’ve been and the nights we’ve had because if this is it, then at least we could end it riiiiight). ********in the interview with our FAVE Gwen Garcia, she asked if it’s better to say goodbye and end a relationship that’s not feeling right or keep trying even if your heart’s not in it. Harry responds with “I think it’s better to say goodbye...but sometimes if youre trying to protect..” Then Louis cuts him off and says “you’re going deep aren’t you”, brushing the question off as a joke but imho i think there was pain in that answer. Then Harry continues “if you’re not 100% in it, I think it’s better for both parties if you say goodbye”. And Louis adds a “yeah” at the end.********
H-Walking in the Wind: I know this is scary but i think we can do it, (you said to me do you believe i’ll be too far? if youre lost just look for me you’ll find me) I think because youre AIMH and i’m always in yours, it’ll be good for us. And look at us being mature, we’re killing it babe. We can live our separate lives and grow on our own. We dont need to make it messy and hurtful. We’re on the same page. (the fact that we can sit right here and say goodbye means we’ve already won. A necessity for apologies between you and me, baby there is none). At this point, we’re kinda part of each other right? So it’s healthy for us to be apart for a bit. (it’s not the end, i’ll see your face again... i know we’ll be alright...just close your eyes and see i’ll be by your side any time you need me). And you’ve helped me grow into the person I am, and I you, so that’s cool as hell, right? (you will find me in places that we’ve never been). We had a TON of fun (we had some good times didnt we) so i feel okay that we’re doing this (goodbyes are bittersweet) and starting the next adventure in our lives. 
H-If I could fly: I. am. yours. Louis. William. Tomlinson. (for your eyes only, i’ll show you my heart). Maybe this growth thing isn’t worth it, let me prove to you how much you mean to me (i think i might give up everything just ask me to). This is gonna be hard as shit because i’m so dependent on you (i’m missing half of me when we’re apart). I’m being honest and I’m being scared and I’m being vulnerable because I can’t lie to you and pretend I’m strong (i let my guard down, right now i’m completely defenseless). But we’re part of each other, right? (i could feel your heart inside of mine). I’ll always be here for you Lou (for when you’re lonely and forget who you are) even if for now we can’t physically be together. 
L-Home: I’ve tried, Harry. I’ve tried to play pretend (told myself i kind of like her but there was something missin in her eyes). But i was lost (i was stumblin, lookin in the dark with an empty heart) because none of it was enough, none of it was YOU (it was there i sawr it in your eyes). And then i met you and you felt the same and we’re both lost souls playing pretend who found magic in each other (but you say you feel the same, could we ever be enough?) Is our love enough to overcome everything? Maybe we can be enough. Maybe I can make this enough, let me try to make it enough for you. And if we go our separate ways, know that I’m here for you no matter what. I won’t let you be lost again. (When you’re lost I’ll find a way and I’ll be your light, you will never feel like you’re alone, I’ll make this feel like home). So go. wander. find yourself. Then when you’re ready, come home. 
 2016-2017
H- Sweet Creature: ***Harry admit that this was the first song he wrote for the album**** We aren’t in the best place rn. We’ve been fighting (had another talk about where it’s going wrong...it’s hard when we argue, we’re both stubborn). But it’s you Louis. It can’t be anyone else. (don’t know where we’re going but we know where we belong... wherever I go, you bring me home). That’s not even a question. I’m still trying to figure out who I am, but the one thing I know is that a large part of who I am is you (we started 2 hearts in one home). And aint no way I’m losing that part of myself (when i run out of road, you bring me home). It was always you. 
H-MMITH: Whenever you’re ready, I’m ready (just let me know i’ll be at the door,  hoping you’ll come around). I know I need to work on myself a little more (i gotta get better, and maybe we’ll work it out) but honestly i’m getting impatient and i want things to go back to how they were and i want to be yours again (once you go without it, nothing else would do). But I can’t communicate this to you clearly so let me just put this in a song and hope you get it (we dont talk about it, it’s something we dont do) ****Harry mentioned in an interview that he expresses himself through songwriting when he can’t say the words directly to a person because it’s easier to just write it in a song than have difficult conversations*****
H-ESNY: ****honestly no idea what this song is about but it’s something to do with them fighting and not communicating and being in a weird place before their relationship is rekindled******* edit: this could be about his stepdad
H-FTDT: I MISS YOU AND I’M TOO FULL OF PRIDE TO TELL YOU DIRECTLY JUST COME BACK INTO LIFE LOU I’M LONELY AND SAD AND EMPTY AND IM NOT FUCKING FINDING MYSELF LIKE YOU SAID I WOULD (woke up alone, played with myself where were you...we havent spoke since you went away, why wont you ever say what you wanna say) So until then I sit and wait for your sorry ass to make the first move (maybe one day you’ll call me and tell me that you’re sorry too...but you never do). Also like i have to hear from other people how you are?? (i saw your friend that you know from work, he said that you feel just fine) ANd you’re sharing OUR clothes with people?? wtf just swallow your pride and call me 
L-Miss You: OKAY BUT I CANT JUST CALL YOU BECAUSE I HAVE PRIDE TOO also my mates are trying to make me get over you (now i’m asking my friends how to say I’m sorry, they say lad give it ttime there’s no need to worry, and we can’t even be on the phone now). So i’m just numbing your absence with partying and drinks but CLEARLY ITS NOT WORKING (should be laughing but there’s something wrong...shit maybe i miss you...when i feel it coming up i just throw it all away, get another few shots cuz it doesn’t matter anyway...such a good time, i’ll believe it this time). This is weird bc like you were my everything but im trying to get used to this and it fucking sux (oh how shit changes, we were in love, now we’re strangers). And tbh, its scary af bc what if this is it (i’m asking myself, is it over?). BUT ALSO LIKE WTF U COULD REACH OUT FIRST YA KNOW (i’ve been checking my phone all evening).
H-Anna: wtf Louis how do you not see how much this is killing me. I miss you so much and seeing you on tv or in pics drives me wild bc you’re not mine. (I don’t want your sympathy but you don’t know what you do to me...everytime I see your face there’s only so much I can take...I guess it would be nice if I can touch your body). And idk if you’re replacing me (don’t know where you’re laying, just know it’s not with me) and we’re in SUCH a weird place rn how do I tell u you’re the loml (don’t know what I’d say if I passed you on the street...don’t know what I’d tell you if you asked me for the truth) so I refuse to put this song on the album and let you know this and give you satisfaction from knowing how gone I still am for you bc I have 0 idea how you feel (hope you never see this and know that it’s for you)
L-Always You: SO THIS IS ME SWALLOWING MY PRIDE STANDING IN FRONT OF YOU SAYING IM SORRY FOR THAT NIGHT... ok but fr i miss u i miss u i miss u i miss u and nothing else compares like i can travel the whole world and all i think about is how much more fun it was with you and the memories we shared and i wish i could just say thx fr th mmrs and move on but actually no thx actually fuck you for making me not able to enjoy my life without you. So like...come home? and wrap your legs around me? also lmao i took El to a gay bar in amsterdam for her bday lmao i miss u come cuddle me and i’ll tell you all about it
L-We Made It: looks like we made it, look how far we’ve come my baby. They saidd I bett they’ll never make it, but just look at us holding onn, we’re still togetherr, still going stronggg. Also to the fans, miss our single bed and the nights we talked about our dreams :-* also Andrew my man luv u
2018-2019
L-KMM: our love was youthful and exhilarating and fucking electric and i think it still can be. dont know what i’d do without you now H 
L-DLIBYH: We’re strong babe and we’ve grown and we aren’t gonna let life drag us down. I’m doing better, you’re doing better, this is what we wanted. And now any shit we go through, we’ll go through TOGETHER 
L-Too Young: Okay but looking back, that was a lot of shit we went through and we were just babies and i’m sorry for not fighting harder (i cant believe i gave in to the pressure when they said a love like this would never last so i cut you off cuz i didnt know no better) baby i tried, i tried to protect you but like it was just so much and i hate that you got hurt and i wont ever let that happen again. ALso go us for being mature and COMMUNICATING (face to face at the kitchen table, we can finally have a conversation that I wish we could’ve had before). ANd i know you’re an arrogant son of a bitch who can’t admit when he’s sorry so here let ME say i’m sorry that i hurt you darling. Like we were too young to know we had everything BUT now we’re old(er) and can realize that when we’re together, we DO have everything now and omg is this our happily ever after and we can have a daughter and name her Darcy 
L-Habit: do i need to spell it out for you iiiiii aaaaaaaaammmmmmm sssssssoooooorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrryyyyyyyy. But tbh i let you go because it felt right because mentally you were already out the door and i needed to give you room to grow babe. And i needed the space too (you gave me the time and the space i was out of control and i’m sorry i let you down). but like also i’ve learned i can’t escape you Styles. You’re always in my fucking heart and my fucking mind and in every essence of my being and somehow I knew that 9 years ago and it took me this long to realize how powerful this really is (guess that that i know what i already knew, i was better with you and i miss you now). Ooooh also my favorite line i wrote (took some time cuz i ran out of energy of playing someone I heard I’m supposed to be and honestly i dont have to choose anymore) like who am i kidding, im done pretending i just wanna be yoursss now
L-Defenseless: I can’t help it okay theres something about you that doesn’t let me stay away. I need you and I know that rekindling this relationship isn’t going to be easy even though it feels so so right. It’s going to be hard work (sleeping on our problems but we’ll solved them in our dreams, wake up early morning and it’s still under the sheets) and we need to communicate and solve our problems but here I am, raw and unfiltered and emotionally naked in front of you ready to lay it all on the table (not sure how to say this right, got so much to lose. NEver been so defenseless). So like this branch I’m reach out to you and you be honest with me too babe (you dont have to keep on being strong for me and you. Acting like you feel no pain, you know i know you do...I can’t get inside, when you’re lost in your pride but you don’t have a thing to prove). Be open with me. Lets talk. Let’s solve problems. Lets have an adult relationship. I’m asking for a little vulnerabiltiy babe. It’s just me. Theres nothing to be scared of
L-Walls: And here you have me in my purest form. No lies, no secrets, no insecurities to hide behind. Losing you was fucking painful but i got through it. I’ve been through hell and back and I’ve fought. And without you, I grew into the person I am. And any further growing i’m doing is gonna be with you. bc it was all for you babe. and honestly i can take anything life throws at me now. I’m strong baby. I’m fucking strong and fucking brave and fucking resilient and...fucking yours. ***** wtf is the I just hope i see you one day and you’ll say to me oh oh********
H-Golden: You are the literal sun and I’m not ready. YOU’RE SUCH A GOOD PERSON (you were way too bright for me, i’m hopeless, broken, so you wait for me in the sky). I’m scared to go through this alone, I need your comfort and your guidance (i can feel you take control of who i am and all i’ve ever known). But you’re scared to go through this with me bc you dont wanna get hurt and i’m too open so where tf does that leave us. ******this could be about coming out especially with the London AND NY secret shows where Harry added the lyric I’m hoping someday you’ll open*******
H-Adore You: You dont have to say you love me, you dont have to say nothing, you dont have to say you’re mine. I’d walk through fire for you. Just let me adore Lou. Like its the only thing I’ll ever do. read: Louis is a great person to just admire what he’s like. ALso I dont need anything back. I just dont want to hide my love for you anymore. I don’t need answers or promises. Just let me adore you. ********the music video is also basically a Louis appreciation post. He was the boy with the smile that the world took away from him. He found Harry lost and loved him and nurtured him and made him confident and allowed him to be who he wanted to be. But in doing so, Harry became big and unsatisfied and wanted to explore the world and was clearly interested in Hollywood and Rockstardom especially evident in his behavior 2014-2015. And Louis wasn’t about that life and didn’t want to hold him back. So he let him free. But they realized that they don’t work apart. Wherever they’re going, they’re going together, as the boy sails into the unknown following the fish. I see it as Harry’s version of “this one is a thank you for what you did for me” ************* I see it, I appreciate it, and I love you for it
H-Lights Up: ****fight with Louis. (What do you mean I’m sorry by the way) About coming out? About fame? (Step into the light, so bright sometimes) Either way, L is the guy driving the motorcycle in the video who makes H feel comfortable and safe until they get pulled over because SOMEONE wont let them love*******
H-Falling: What if i’m out, what if i’m someone you won’t talk about? Okay maybe I lied I do want you to claim me. Would me coming out of the closet make that hard for you? I CAN’T GO THROUGH AN IDENTITY CRISIS WITHOUT YOU LOU. I picked someone supportive and now I’m spoiled and I dont know how to be with myself. You want back in my life but what if I dont deserve it? (you said you cared and you missed me too...what i’m someone i dont want around). What if you’re better off without me? (i get the feeling that you’ll never need me again). I know youve been through so much shit because of me, things you’ve never even told me about and im afraid...that I wasn’t worth it. Am I being selfish? because either way, i want YOU (what if you’re someone i just want around). Does that make me a bad person? 
H-TBSL: ****Probably when they starting talking again but it was v casual and they didn’t really discuss their relationship yet*****. I MISS U BUT I WONT TELL U THAT and its nice to talk to u again i missed your voice but if u call me baby i will kill u bc that word has weight OKAY. Like i know you just call everyone babe and darling and sweetheart but baby is FOR ME and only for me when you wake up with me and cuddle me and if you think you have any right calling me baby without giving the luxury of being in a relationship with you then piss off because that shit hurts dude. (i know that you’re trying to be friends, know that you mean it...it’s hard for me to go home to be so lonely). ALso it’s not my fault i’m like this, you literally captured my heart when i was 16 like wtf do u expect (dont blame me for falling, i was just a little boy)
H-Sunflower Vol. 6: we were babies and i was so enamored by you and you’re so bright and beautiful and i want to watch you all day and make you smile and i want you to touch my hair and call me curly and i hope im not making you uncomfortable with my heart eyes but like how are you so perfect. I hope you think i’m cool, i’m really trying but like you’re SO FUNNY and charming and everyone loves you i hope im not embarassing myself. And now it’s like 8 years later and i think i can have you again and i want you so bad but i dont wanna seem too eager and im trying to have dignity and not text you first but like also i want nothing more than to talk to you. Do you think i’m cool now? did you like my new hairstyle? Do you think i’m funny on tour? I want everything i want to be domestic again and kiss in the kitchen and i want to cook for you and as;ldfa;sdhaf i want to buy you flowers everyday and shower ur cute face with kiss. boopx28 
H-Canyon Moon: Hell yea i got ma man back and i have a girlfriend named Jennifer ;) and we are domestic and even though I HATE being away from him for work (so hard to leave it) we have the 2 week rule yall then i can wrap my legs around him and after so so so long I’ll be h.o.m.e. Also did i tell you his eyes are so so blue like sky who i dont know her
H-TPWK: So we’re really doing this. We don’t need to have it all figured out. We can just be us. and happy. and dance. The world loves us babe. (Giving second chances, I don’t need all the answers and if we’re here long enough we’ll see it’s all for us and we’ll belong)
H-Fine Line: You’ve got my devotion but man I can hate you sometimes....We’ll be a fine line. Between what? love and hate? public and private? out and in the closet? each others’ and ourselves? Idk. But i’m going to swallow my pride (my hands at risk I fold) because no matter what, the worst possible outcome is not having you. And I never wanna go through that again. I know we have work to do on our relationship (spreading you open is the only way I know you). And there’s lot of unknown here (there’s things that we’ll never know) but what i do know is that i cant resist you (you sunshine you temptress) and i cant be without you ever again. I think it’ll be hard as hell. But when have we known love as anything but hard? And when have we known our love as anything but worth it? We’ll be a fine line baby. But i know, i knowww with every part of me that we’ll be alright. Because these past 10 years, we’ve been through A LOT. ANd it could have ruined us and made us cynical and cold and closed off. And I think at one point it did. But you know what we did? We fought it. We fought it together. Then we fought it individually. And we became BRAVE. And a brilliant man once said, “love is only for the brave”. 
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thompsborn · 3 years
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do you have any spare ironhusbands or sambucky headcanons?
ABSO-FUCKING-LUTELY
oh my god okay i’ve been so fucking wrapped up in both ironhusbands and sambucky and absolutely nothing else for WEEKS because of tfatws (obviously if you have seen my endless spam of reblogs but can you BLAME ME) and the portal closed has ironhusbands so i’ve been just. oh my god i am happily drowning in this and them and i do not need nor want air. ok.
also these are all hc’s based just in canon not au, and lol warning this got so long help me, though my brain is so scrambled from tfatws finale that all sambucky thoughts are scrambled and jumbled so i wasn't able to coordinate them as well as ironhusbands so the ironhusbands section is definitely longer pfighf i'm so sorry i'm like this
ironhusbands:
when they met at mit tony didnt know shit. like. like nothing. he didnt know a single god damn thing about anything. like he was a genius he could solve any equation given to him and baffled professors when he was handed like two supposedly impossible equations to this fuckin fourteen year old and he just looked at them with like a mcdonalds burger or some shit hanging out of his mouth and just answered them no problem, but he was still such a hopeless idiot, and rhodey, also a genius attending as a sixteen year old, had to teach him the basics of life, like. making toast. tony how do NOT know how to make toast. its TOAST. you put it in the TOASTER. have you NEVER SEEN A—OH MY GOD HOW DID YOU FUCKING CATCH IT ON FIRE—
he does not perfect the clearly impossible task of making toast until he is 17 and rhodey buys him a cake to celebrate the momentous occasion even though tony went though 528 toasters
you are gold by the national parks. thats it. thats all i have to say. listen to the song and look up the lyrics. you’ll get it.
and also paper planes by jon bellion but specifically for after rhodey tells tony he’s gonna join the air force and tony is worried but doesnt know how to show it and they have like a chill night in and all tony can think about is how stupid he is and how he’s such a coward because he cant get himself to tell rhodey that hi!! i love u!! and im scared to lose u and that you’ll get hurt and maybe die or smth!!
when rhodey finds out about how tony was raised (going with mcu, where tony wasnt physically abused but more emotionally neglected and ignored by howard and always talked down to and compared to others and wasnt treated like he was worthy and never was told he was loved and everything like that) he gets PISSED. like he is MONUMENTALLY angry. and it takes YEARS for him to find out about this too. and it actually puts a bit of a strain on their friendship for awhile when they meet too
like rhodey knows about the starks obviously and he assumes tony is going to be this obnoxious arrogant rich boy asshole and is so not looking forward to being roommates but he was raised to have an open mind and give everyone a chance, but tony was raised to be wary of everyone and keep his walls up and his emotions in shackles because whatever he shows can be used against him, so they clash, you know? they dont fight or anything but theres tension bc it isnt right and they dont get each other.
rhodey tries to be nice and tony doesnt understand nice because his only example of nice is jarvis and his mom and even then his mom and jarvis are always off with his dad so he barely sees them so its still rare for him to experience the nice of them so he doesnt know how to be around someone nice all the time, and so he gets defensive and thinks about how howard drilled it into him to be wary and he thinks maybe rhodey isnt ACTUALLY nice but someone PRETENDING to be
and rhodey starts to feel justified in assuming the worst about tony stark because tony is all cold and distant and rude and is about to stop the keeping an open mind thing about a month into their first year but then he comes back to their dorm early from class one day and tony doesnt come in so rhodey is just standing there and watches for a minute as tony sits there staring down at his twenty sixth attempt at a letter he wants to send his mom becauss he knows his mom likes letters even though he could just call but they havent really called him (howards fault but he’s fourteen still and its hard to rationalize that howards busy life and controlling thumb extends past his son) and rhodey is just confused because tony just suddenly sighs and sniffles a bit and murmurs “this is so stupid” and crumbles up the paper and throws it in the garbage and rhodey cant help but peer into it and barely sees the words hey mom scribbled at the top and that. that. hm. okay.
so rhodey keeps trying because he wasnt supposed to see that but he did and now he kind of has a feeling that maybe tony isnt all that cold and distant and rude as he seems, maybe he just doesnt really know how to be any different, so he thinks about all the subtle little ways that his family has shown him they care about him and starts to invite tony to go get food or to study together even though neither of them really need to study or to help each other with assignments or just anything thats mundane enough to not raise suspicion but still starts to open the door and make tony relax around him just that little bit and then before tony realizes it the end of their first year is there and theyre like friends or something and it hits him that he’s gonna miss rhodey.
for the first time ever there’s someone other than his mom and jarvis that he’s actually going to miss.
rhodey grins at him and says that they’ll be roommates again next year because they have to be and that the summer will be over before they know it and the sentiment is nice but tony spends the summer alone wandering around a house too big and empty after being in a dorm that’s small and has a friend.
but rhodey doesn’t know this. like he knows that tony isn’t the kind of guy he originally assumed but he doesn’t know that he’s literally ignored and neglected and like emotionally and sometimes verbally abused so he’s kind of surprised when the next year begins and they DO end up being roommates again (because tony kind of asked his mom, on a rare day when he got to see her and howard wasnt around, to get mit to make sure they could be) and tony just HUGS him like its been years and they’ve known each other forever but he goes with it and hugs him back because maybe tony’s just more affectionate once he gets to know someone and rhodey is okay w that.
they get closer as the years go by and they graduate from mit together and they’re BEST friends and at the end of the year rhodey invites tony to spend new years eve w his family but tony cant bc howard is having some kind of gala starting at 5 because hes weird and dumb and tony hates it and he also isnt given the option of not going even though he doesnt want to but the entire way there howard drills into him about not fucking up and berates him for all the times he has in the past and when they get there tony is already just not feeling it so he’s like nope!! no!! i simply cannot!!
so he goes in and finds an exit thats in the back and he leaves and finds a fucking payphone of all things and he has rhodeys home number memorized for years now and he calls and someone he doesnt knoe answers and theres music in the background and voices and tony’s entire stomach is in his throat and his heart is sunken into his twisted gut because he just wanted one night where maybe he could smile next to his parents and feel like he fit with them but he couldnt have that and he asks to talk to rhodey and then he is and asks if its too late to accept his invite and rhodey is like yeah of course do u need my address bc its still only 5 pm and its a 2 hour drive between south philadelphia and manhattan so he’d make it with plenty of time before it got to midnight so yay
and tony is like. oh. hm. i dont know how to drive actually. that was a thing that no one ever thought to teach me even though i asked about it about ten million times. and rhodey is used to tony not knowing how to do things that most people their age can (see: the toast) and plus its not uncommon for people from new york to not drive anyway so he doesnt think anything of it and instead asks for tony’s address to come pick him up instead and they’d still make it back by like 9-9:30 so that would work too
and thats when tony is like. well.
about that.
he might be calling from a payphone.
on a random street corner.
and its kind of raining. and he’s cold. and he’s a bit dulled out from everything so he doesn’t really think about the fact that admitting this is going to lead to having to explain what happened and also why and that is happens often. but that doesnt matter because he kind of just wants to be with his best friend and not back at that gala with his dad right now.
rhodey is like,,, ok. ok. wheres a coffee shop nearby u can wait in. and tony thankfully is by a 24 hour one and tells him the name and the street corner its closest to and rhodey is like i’ll be there asap and tony goes and he waits.
a two hour drive turns into an hour and a half because rhodey is Worried™
but when he walks in tony goes from being all dulled out to being all HOLY SHIT because rhodey has a SPLIT LIP and he’s like WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED WHAT THE FUCK WHAT
and rhodey’s like no no its good my uncle was having fun and trying to wrestle with me and he accidentally elbowed me its all good man dont worry about it
tony isnt used to accidentally being hurt tho so he’s still like hmmm but he takes rhodeys word on it and they head out and tony wont say what happened or why he was calling from a payphone ?? which btw tony literally only was able to do bc there happened to be dropped change on the ground because boy would not have change on him ok, but rhodeys like alright lets go with this for now
so they gets to the rhodes house and it is in full swing with family and extended family and adopted family bc they are 100% the family that just adopts the neighborhood kids and the people who have no one else and like ex boyfriends and ex girlfriends even after the relationship ends bc they still are family despite not dating whoever it was they had been dating in order to be introduced to them so its a LOT of people and tony is like. this is semi familiar in terms a lot of people but this is NOTHING like what he has ever seen before holy fucking SHIT
rhodey is just like oh u have a small family then? so ur used to smaller gatherings?
and tonys like wtf are gatherings
and rhodey is starting to get a feel for what might be wrong but just takes tony inside to get him changed because he’s not spending new years eve at the rhodes house in a fucking expensive suit ok
tony is completely out of his element and like he’s not the only white guy there bc again the rhodes adopt people and those people are of every race and nationally you can imagine but he just isnt used to the vibe there are people laughing and sitting close together and playing games and theres music playing but not like classy music its music people can dance to and are dancing to and the food isnt the food he’s used to at galas and shit and nothing is what he’s used to and he just sticks to rhodey’s side like a fucking lost puppy and tries his best not to look like an idiot when rhodey introduces him to people and a lot of them know who he is but dont judge him or assume shit about him bc obviously if he’s friends w rhodey then he’s a good guy and they want to know him and thats enough
but tony is v overwhelmed bc what the FUCK IS HAPPENING this is nothing like anything he has ever experienced EVER
so eventually rhodey can tell he’s getting overwhelmed and takes him inside and lets him have a breather and then asks him about whats going in and thats when rhodey learns about what tonys life at home is really like and. anger.
SO MUCH anger
because not only has every single assumption he has ever made about tony been proven wrong, but now he knows that the best person he knows has never been treated the way he deserves and has never known a true home and comfort and love and safety and
and he’s gonna fix it
and this is the first step
so he takes tony back out and they’re still just friends but this is the day they both quietly realize they might kind of definitely like each other as more because tony is still so confused by the fact that what he knows isnt the normal and overwhelmed by how much there is and how different it is but rhodey holds his hand as a grounding point and whenever it might be too much they move off to the side where they arent completely gone but its less hectic and a bit more quiet and its just nice
tony goes to rhodeys house for every holiday despite whatever howard says
rhodey decks howard the only time they ever meet before tonys parents die and he has the most shit eating grin on his face afterwards that tony cant help but lose his shit laughing his ass off
anyway i didnt mean to ramble for so long about that specific idea so i’ll end the ironhusbands ramble with this one last thought, which is as follows:
rhodey gets hurt in the air force at some point, and it isnt that bad tbh but he does have to go the hospital and shit and gets stitches or whatever idk i dont know what specifically happens i just think it’d be just bad enough that it takes him a few weeks to be able to go back to work but he’s not like OH GOD HURT yk?
but like stated above tony was scared and worried when rhodey told him he was gonna go into the air force so he hears about this and they’re probably like almost 30 at this point because they’re dumb and it takes them forever to get their heads out of their asses (i say this even though in the portal closed it takes them even longer but i digress) rhodey has like his mon his sister his niece visiting him and they were worried but they know hes fine so theyre just talking and in a good mood and then—
door slams open. tony stark enter stage left. disheveled suit, fresh from a meeting he definitely was not supposed to leave, having flown in from maibu the second he heard and then had happy drive him and then got impatient because of traffic and ended up sprinting like ten blocks while happy was like what the FUCK
of course rhodeys family are well aware that these idiots are desperately in love with each other so they’re just like lol ok and just leave the room while tony starts fretting over him like he’s about to die himself if he doesnt know if rhodey is okay and rhodey is like tony tony dude tones stop tony im okay tony stop it
until finally tony just fucking breaks down like full on tears in his eyes voice cracking hands clasped as he leans against rhodeys bed and tells him that he was so scared and he is so scared all the time whenever rhodey is out there because all he can think about is losing him and him getting hurt or dying and it’s maddening and this is when they get their heads out of their asses and kiss for the first time
(irony at its finest bc later when they are married and tony becomes iron man rhodey refuses to not have a suit of his own because if tony is going out there in a metal flying tin can then he isn’t going alone and wow what a power couple)
sambucky:
firstly i’m going to go post tfatws, but i’ll make a bullet point before going into it so if you wanna read up until that point you can but most of this will be random little headcanons based post tfatws
also it isnt like a whole plotline thing like the ironhusbands ones ended up being these ones are more random and kinda all over the place but loosely connected
update from after writing this: i lied
let me start by saying my interpretation of why they are the way they are in civil war is because of steve
thats not saying steve is the bad guy i mean to say that they’re jealous of each other because they thought that THEY were steve’s best friend who the fuck is THIS guy i dont want him here go away
children. they are children.
which i find very funny to imagine from sams pov because he literally is a licensed therapist and would 100% recognize why he’s acting how he is but he’s petty enough to do it anyway
and also he literally was helping steve track bucky down but i like to imagine that sam didnt think they’d ever really find him again and it’d just make him and steve like super mega best friends or something because hes a CHILD
and then from bucky’s pov steve goes through all this trouble to find him and protect him and then this random guy is acting like steve’s best friend and gets to sit in the front seat ??? bullshit. absolutely bullshit. worst thing ever. so stupid.
its so funny to me okay its SO funny
its like that schoolyard thing where your friend makes another friend and you hate it so much that you do something stupid like color on their drawing or put gum in their hair or whatever but they’re adults with 1. super soldier serum or 2. a superhero reputation/avengers status and suit with wings. so thats a thing.
post civil war i dont think they get much yk. because bucky is out in cryo and team cap is on the run and i doubt theyre able to return to wakanda much, if at all, and then it’s infinity war and then it’s endgame and after endgame there’s the aftermath and the aftermath is a mess
i like to think they have some moments before tfatws though. not many but enough for that slight foundation thats we can kind of see in episode 2 yk.
okay NOW it gets into post tfatws so!!
SO post tfatws everything is different because now they not only have spent all this time together, but they understand each other in a way that they didn’t before. in a way no one ever has. not even steve, who may have known them before, but he isn’t here anymore and he wouldn’t understand who they are now vs who they were before and it’s different.
bucky finds comfort in sam’s home town. sam finds comfort in watching bucky find a home there and he doesnt know why.
also sam treats redwing like a puppy and lets him fly around on his own and gets pet and stuff and bucky acts annoyed but the longer it happens you can tell he’s like “oh my god why is this thing endearing”
bucky has nightmares and sam knows this but bucky doesnt know that sam also has nightmares until one night when they’re still in sams home town and they’re staying on the boat because sams nephews are having a sleepover with some friends and they didnt want to get in the way or smth idk i just want an excuse for them to be on the boat and somewhat secluded from people but bucky already woke up from his nightmare and is out on the deck to get some fresh out and then oop
sam havin a nightmare too
because fucking of COURSE sam has nightmares he has been through some shit too!! not being able to catch riley and everything that happened since meeting steve and thanos and he turned to dust alone in the bushes ok like yes everyone that died were traumatized undoubtedly (peter my baby boy baby im so sorry that you got the worst of it) but bucky was around people but sam was laying on the ground and probably just watched his hands as he disappeared and he was alone and like. jesus christ ok.
and then steve trusted him with every weight and everything that comes with the shield not knowing how much more the shield has when he gave it to a black man and just like he has nightmares everyone in marvel does its a fact
but bucky finds out like this and he is shocked even though he realizes he probably should have been able to guess that this is a thing and he knows so much more about sam now than he ever did but this is how he learns more. he learns about riley. he learns so much.
sometimes bucky has those like “oh shit” moments where he’s like “maybe i was kind of a dick to someone who didnt deserve it” and he already had one of those with sam about the shield but he has another one because he assumed shit about sam when they were being all childish and jealous about someone else being friends with steve but like fuck
steve and sam probably got it
the not catching someone. the way it felt to try and to reach out and to miss and to have to choice but to watch as they fell.
what’s different is that steve got bucky back. he got to have that relief, eventually, even if there was the pain of knowing bucky had been taken by hydra, but at least he knew bucky had made it.
sam didn’t have that. riley didnt make it.
therefore, bucky has his “oh shit”
and bucky was already going soft around the edges with sam (as clearly seen in the last two episodes of tfatws, ESPECIALLY the finale because like did tou SEEZ ALL THE HEART EYES oh my GOD) but it’s this that really makes something in him melt and he just. he loses the last remnants of whatever tension or resentment or whatever negative feeling he may have been clutching onto.
there wasnt much left. but now theres none. now its all washed away.
its gone, and he gets it.
sam is a licensed therapist and he knew the reason he was being all dumb and childish and jealous with bucky was because steve had another best friend but also because steve’s other best friend was the guy that had been a big factor in how him and steve understood each other and how they bonded and it
it had kind of felt like they lost part of that when they found bucky again in civil war and he kind of wanted to blame bucky for it even though he didnt actually blame him at all so all it translated to was that dumb kind of jealous thing instead
but now it’s just them. its sam and bucky and it isnt steve and it isnt about steve and it shouldnt be because its about them. its about the boat and the water and the way they sit and watch the waves while the silence settles over them and the way that bucky says, “im sorry.”
its the way sam says, “me too.”
and bucky says, “you dont have to be.”
its the way they stay there until sarah comes to get them for breakfast and sams nephews convince them to play with them and their friends and the world is still shit and there is so much to do but
but its this and its them and that can wait
it can wait
they can take their time if they want to
maybe they’ve earned that much, at least
(it isn't a fast development because they're a complicated pair and there's so much to the two of them that need to figured out individually before they can even realize how well they work together, but the steps are so much easier knowing that they have the other in their corner and bucky knows that sam's home town is a place he's welcome to go and sam helps him make his own dreary little apartment into something that feels real and tangible with a bed and a couch and when they've become something that resembles stable and they've found a balance and they're okay, that's when they realize that maybe they can try for the more that sometimes bubbles under their skin and that they started to think about the more they spend time together. the warmth that sam feels every time he sees bucky playing games with his nephew and the smile that bucky has to fight to hide and still can't fully suppress when sam stands tall and proud with the shield in its rightful place, and it takes time, it takes work, it takes carefully placed bricks to build the foundation they need, but they get there, and when they do...
when they do, they're already happy, and it just makes them happier, and that's what makes it so much better.
that's what makes it worth the wait.)
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detectivesofty · 4 years
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staking your claim | j.h.
Summary: Natalie has problems with Nina and you’re helping out, like the good future sister (in-law??) you are
Pairing: Jay Halstead x Doctor!Reader / Natalie Manning x Will Halstead / Nina Shore x Will Halstead
Song I listened to while writing: Bust Your Windows by Glee (cuz it’s a fucking bop)
Author’s Note: I literally wrote this in one sitting bc I got inspired lmao. This is very heavily centered around Natalie and Reader’s friendship, because I feel like Nat needs someone in her corner. This takes place in Season 2, Ep. 19 of Chicago Med and I know Jay and Reader’s relationship doesn’t make sense canon-wise, but this is a fanfic after all, so let’s just pretend that Jay and Reader have been in a commited relationship with each other for a while. Happy reading!
Warnings: mentions of alcohol
Word Count: 1,9k
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“Hey Y/N,” Nina greeted you and you barely glanced up to greet her back, your focus entirely on your notes. Nina then turned to Natalie, who was standing right next to you.
“Hey Natalie. Can I ask you a favor?”
Natalie, held a finger up. “Uhm, one second,” she said, turning back to April. “Hey April, can you try and track down Connor for me?”
“Alright.”
“Thank you!” Natalie turned back to Nina, the stress written all over her face. “Sorry. What’s up?”
“I was going to give this to Will, but he’s busy. Can I leave it with you?”
That suddenly got your attention. Why would Nina ever ask Natalie for a favor regarding Will?
Natalie paused as well. “Sure,” she then replied, reaching a hand out for the jersey.
“He’s going to watch the game with his brother tonight. I slept in it last night and when he left this morning I was still in bed,” Nina added with a laugh and you furrowed your brows, while you kept your head down. 
“I’d leave it in his locker but I wanted to make sure he gets it.”
You rolled your eyes, but put on a smile when Nina looked at you. She wasn’t the best actress and you could see right through her act, even if Natalie didn’t.
Natalie seemed a bit lost as she held the jersey, glancing at you briefly. “... Okay?”
“Thanks. You’re the best. Bye Y/N, see you later!” Nina called over to you before leaving the ED. 
You forced a smile and waved at her, before turning to Natalie. She was still staring at the jersey in her hands and you nudged her gently. 
“Hey you okay?” 
Natalie nodded quickly, putting the jersey away. “Yeah, I am fine… But Nina was acting weird, right?”
Chuckling, you shrugged with your shoulders. You didn’t really like Nina with Will, if you were honest. She seemed nice enough, but you never clicked with her, despite her constant efforts to spend time with you. In your eyes, Natalie was the perfect one for Will. Especially because you knew of Will’s feelings for Natalie, you know, before the thing with Nina started. 
“Duh. She’s trying to mark her territory, it was so obvious.”
“What?” 
“I am pretty sure that she sees you as a threat, Nat. And the other day-”
“Doctor Manning, Doctor Y/L/N! Incoming, vehicular accident, two girls and their mother!”
Natalie gave you a look, which meant she was in no way done with this conversation. But for the meantime, you took care of the two hurt girls. Unfortunately, the day didn’t progress as you had expected it to go. The hospital’s server got hacked and you had to resort to old-fashioned blackboards, without knowing patients’ medical history. 
At the end of the day, you were completely exhausted and just wanted to fall in bed. You threw your jacket on and grabbed your purse, when Natalie came into the lounge. 
“Hey Y/N, are you going home?” 
You gave her a tired smile and nodded. “Yeah, I am beat.”
“I wanted to talk about the thing you mentioned this morning…?”
Frowning, you thought back to earlier until you finally remembered. “Oh yeah, uhm. Do you maybe want to come over? Jay’s watching the game at a bar with Will so I’ll be alone tonight.”
“Yeah, sure. That sounds nice. I’ll just swing by Helen real quick to check on Owen, and then I’ll come over, yeah?”
Nodding, you gave her a thumbs up, rubbing her shoulder. “See you later, Nat.” With that, you left the ED and drove home to an empty apartment. The moment you stepped into your home, you let out a loud sigh at the sight of Jay’s shoes being all over the place. Moving in together was Jay’s idea. Your jobs ate up a lot of your time and when Jay was on a hard case, you often had gone days without seeing each other. Living together had a lot of pros, but that was before you knew Jay loved leaving his shoes where he took them off, which could be basically anywhere in the apartment. 
But you loved that man, so you’d put them away for now and kick his ass later. 
Dropping off your purse on its designated place, you headed to the shower straight away. After a refreshing shower, you ordered pizza for you and Natalie, when a text from Jay came in.
Jay: hey babe, you home yet?
You: yeah, just got out of the shower
Jay: Without me?😜
You: First of all, ew You: second of all, you’re too old to be using emojis
Jay: 😭
You: nat’s coming over now and I just ordered some pizza
Jay: okay, have fun, love you Jay: save me some slices!
You: Love you too. And no!
At that moment, the doorbell rang and you put the phone away to open the door, expecting either Natalie or the delivery guy. But instead, it was Natalie, the delivery girl. 
“I bumped into the delivery boy on my way up and paid him,” Natalie said and you beamed at her, ushering her in. 
“You didn’t have to do that. Come in!”
You grabbed a bottle of wine and two wine glasses, then situated yourself on the couch with Natalie. The two of you devoured a couple of slices before Natalie spoke up. 
“So. About what you said this morning… Why would Nina see me as a threat? I don’t see Will that way.”
Pouring yourself another glass of wine, you gave Natalie a look. “Really? I see the way you look at him, Nat. The two of you have always been dancing around each other. Nina has eyes, she can see that.”
Natalie opened her mouth, frowning, before she closed it again. 
“I never did anything while they were dating, I swear,” she insisted and you gave her a smile. 
“I know, Natalie. No one thinks that, I promise.”
“It’s just…” She sighed. “At first, I didn’t want to rush into a relationship, because I haven’t worked through my grief yet. And then Will wanted to move on, which I totally understood. And with Jeff, I thought he was the right one, considering his history with my Jeff. But then he turned out to be the complete opposite. And now… Will’s with Nina and there’s nothing I can do about it.”
“At this point, I think you should just let their relationship run its course. I know it sounds kind of mean to say that, but I don’t think that they’re a good fit. You and Will are. You challenge each other, but also make each other better. I can see how you look at him when you think no one is watching; Will looks at you the same way, Nat.”
You could see the hope glimmer in her eyes and while you didn’t want your friend to get hurt, since Will and Nina are in fact still dating and even living together, you knew how right you were. You spent endless hours talking to Will about Natalie and you knew that feelings like that didn’t disappear overnight. 
“I just don’t want Nina to think I am trying to step on her toes and ruin their relationship, you know,” Natalie added. “The way she acted today kind of intimidated me.”
“Yeah I totally get that. She was acting a bit crazy,” you laughed and Natalie grinned at you, nudging you with her shoulder. 
“Enough about me and my problems. How are things with Jay?”
“Oh, things are good.”
The rest of the night passed in a blur while you and Natalie talked about everything and everyone. Nights like these were much too rare and you enjoyed spending time with your friends outside of work. It was nearing one am when you heard keys jangling at the front door, you and Natalie instinctively turning to the door. 
As the door opened, Jay stilled in the doorway, like a deer caught in headlights. 
“Hey Jay.” 
“Hey babe.”
Jay waved, slightly abashed as he took his shoes off. “Hey guys, thought you were already in bed,” he mumbled, walking over to the couch to press a kiss on your head and high five Natalie. “I am just going to go to the bathroom real quick,” Jay told you and disappeared into the bathroom. 
“I think that’s my cue to leave,” Natalie said, yawning loudly. “Don’t want to be too tired for work tomorrow.” 
You walked her to the door and leaned against the doorway while she collected her things.
“Thanks for today, Y/N. I really needed that.”
Smiling, you pulled her in a tight hug. “Anytime, Nat. That’s what friends are for. Get home safely, okay?” 
“I will. Say bye to Jay for me,” Natalie answered and you nodded, waving before you closed the door. With a yawn, you locked it and trudged over to the coffee table to clean it up, throwing the pizza cartons in the trash and putting the wine glasses in the dishwasher. You looked up when Jay came out of the bathroom, looking around. 
“Nat already left?”
You nodded and wrapped your arms around his neck. “Yeah. It’s late and we have work tomorrow. You okay?”
“Mhm,” Jay nodded, leaning in to kiss you. The kiss was short and sweet, which made you smile against his lips. You pulled away after a while, observing him. His cheeks were flushed and it was obvious he’s had a few beers. 
“What did you guys talk about?”
You snorted out a laugh. “Uh, about Will.”
“What about Will?” Jay raised a confused eyebrow. 
“You know. Will and Nat. Nina came up to her today, trying to stake her claim. Waving around Will’s jersey like it was a prize. It was ridiculous.”
Jay laughed, shaking his head. “She did? Nina’s crazy.”
Shrugging with your shoulders, you pursed your lips. “I kinda get her. I mean, if anyone would even think about getting with my man, I’d whack them.”
“Yeah?” Jay asked, smirking at you in amusement. “You’d be willing to go to prison for me?”
“As if you’d let me go to prison,” you snorted and he chuckled, leaning his forehead against yours. 
“Yeah you’re right. Can’t let anyone hurt my girl.” 
You felt warmth spreading in your chest, just like it did everytime Jay called you his girl, even after all this time. 
“You wanna go to bed?” Jay asked softly and you nodded, looking up at him. 
“Carry me?”
He groaned out, but complied anyway, hooking his arms under your thighs to hoist you up, carrying you into the bedroom. The two of you quickly got changed and slipped under the sheets, cuddling up. 
“You know,” Jay murmured, nosing along your neck. “I think you’re right about Will and Natalie. He’s still got that look in his eyes when he talks about her.”
“Yeah? I thought so. He should stop leading Nina on, then. It’s not really fair.”
“Tell him. He listens to you more.”
You rolled your eyes and swatted Jay’s hands away, reaching for your phone to text Will.
You: Get your head in the game, Will. If you still have feelings for Natalie, you should end things with Nina. It’s not fair for either of them. 
Unsurprisingly, ellipses popped up a minute later.
Will is typing…
Will: You’re right. Thanks.
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renegadeontherunn · 3 years
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@city-of-fae​ LISS OKAY I STARTED ANSWERING YOUR ASK AND TUMBLR GLITCHED AND ATE IT I’M SO SORRY UGHHHH BUT ANYWAY
!!!!!! YOU ARE CERTAINLY NOT THE ONLY ONE!!! OBI AND SOKA CONSUMES ME SOMETIMES AND THIS IS ONE OF THOSE TIMES!!!! I LOVE THEM SO MUCH YES!!!!! and thank you so much for the ask that tumblr was very mean to!!!!! let me go listen--
the song in question
OH MY GOD
ONE SECOND I'M JUST OVER HERE SOBBING GAHHHHHHH THIS SONG!!!! oh MAN this song in the context of obi-wan and ahsoka????? AND POST-ROTS????? GODDDDDD OKAY YES YES YES ABSOLUTELY LISS YOUR MIND--
awake, awake, you children bold / take hold of all your books and fold / the corners, they warned us / a storm is coming on
this is an AMAZING start to this song given the context of post-rots. it really gives me the feeling of yeah waking everyone up and frantically whispering get up, get up, grab your stuff we have to go which just gahhhh yes reminds me a lot of obi-wan and ahsoka having to leave behind everything in the wake of anakin's "storm coming on." and, of course, "children bold" is very ahsoka and obi-wan would tell her to take her books that's so :'))
what do you mean you've lost your scarlet welly boots? / do y'know what they cost? / wear a raincoat or it'll soak you to the bone
okay again, I can see this scene so clearly in my head, they're rushing around searching for all their stuff and ahsoka's like "obi-wan I can't find my boots" and it's all very much parent scolding child in a hurry/panic but then still turning around and saying "make sure you wear a raincoat, here take mine" and again that is very much obi-wan and ahsoka to me!!
and I love you, don't you know / that I'll be with you all along, as long as you are kind / to those who are not strong and cannot find their scarlet welly boots
I feel like this really captures an essential of obi-wan's teachings to ahsoka: be kind, help everyone you can, remember when you were in that situation, "teaching is a privilege, it's part of a Jedi's responsibility to help train the next generation," etc etc and also just the "I love you, don't you know / that I'll be with you all along" godddd thinking about that with obi and soka is mAKING ME SOB
cause when it's cold / I'll wrap my scarf around you / and when it's hard / I'll place your head into my hands
yes. yes yes yes yes this!!! this right here is obi-wan and ahsoka!!!! I'm sobbing
and when you scream that it's not fair / it's like I've gone off to the coast / left you behind just standing there / pretending not to see your ghost / if only you could hear my voice / but you are screaming far too loud to hear me swear / just because I left doesn't mean I'm not still there
goddddd okay yes, I think this can be seen through a few different contexts, definitely post-rots and also deception (oUCH OUCH OUCH) like you said, and also I think this works for post-s5. just all the times where obi-wan and ahsoka were separated and this is just. ouch ouch ouch. but yeah this part with deception??? such a good angle, ahsoka screaming it's not fair, but obi-wan saying I'm still here. ugh. pain
I get to watch you grow up now / and make me proud / make all of the mistakes that make me laugh / oh, darling, lord, how you make me laugh / . . . / cause you were always strong / when you were young, you'd kick things just to see if they would fall
I'm sobbing. liss, I'm sobbing. this! this is so obi-wan looking at ahsoka when she was a padawan. I think she really really brought a source of light and hope to both his and anakin's lives during the war and their characters are just so good together bc she's a lot like anakin ("you'd kick things just to see if they would fall"), but not nearly as weighed down as either of them (at least not until the end), and like. they are just :'))))) they! are! father! and! daughter!!!!
they said "that girl, she's wrong" / but I'll stick up for you / even though you haven't got a clue
the wrong jedi. that's all I'm gonna say. just. the wrong jedi
actually, that's not all I'm gonna say KJASJKDLADKLJS bc I have a lot of conflicting feelings and thoughts about obi-wan's involvement in the wrong jedi arc and since we got basically nothing in the actual show (because d*sney is a bunch of cowards) it all sort of has to be conjecture. but anyway, I think that obi-wan did stick up for ahsoka as much as he could and I really want to believe that he was right beside anakin defending her and like really trying to prove her innocence, but what we're shown in the show is. not that and I've seen a lot of really like solid and well-informed posts about how a big part of obi-wan's characterization is that he is someone who lets go and I can't find the one I'm thinking of rn but also like. idk it is shown how conflicted he is during that arc. plus, how much could they have even taken obi-wan's opinion into account bc it's nearly impossible for him to be unbiased?? like he's her grandmaster!! idk and that is NOT what this post is about ajskdkljdsa, but basically. yes. yes this is obi-wan in the wrong jedi.
and I'm so proud of you
screaming, crying, throwing up. GOD I LOVE THEM SO MUCH
and when you scream "I'm not alright" / and throw my picture at the wall / "you were supposed to be my light / and keep me safe against them all / how could you leave me here?" you'll scream / . . . / you'll say "I've been so scared / you left me here behind / do you not care? / how the fuck am I supposed to carry on without you here?"
this! this is so so so much deception, post-s5, post-rots, all of this!!!! this is ahsoka confused and angry and hurt and betrayed and homesick and I'm going to SOB. I don't have much more to say about this line, just. yes. yes yes yes this
you'll miss me, oh jesus christ, you'll miss me / just as much as all those years ago, and you'll look up at the storm
okay yes this is definitely reminding me of post-rots ahsoka looking back on deception and post-rots obi-wan looking back on the wrong jedi both of them missing the other, both of them knowing what it feels like to lose each other and be separated and just having that happen again and again :(((
just when you're about to give up every hope you have, you turn around / perched by the stairs, someone's gone and left behind / a brand new pair of scarlet welly boots
this hits me SO HARD. it is so so indicative of obi-wan and ahsoka still being around post-rots even though they both think the other is gone (which is just. so heartbreaking I can't) but they both still have their memories of each other and what they've taught each other and I think that they really do live on in each other's lives after revenge of the sith and they both have the task of keeping anakin's memory alive and ensuring safety and happiness for other people and while their lives and missions are very different, they both are still trying to do the same thing and they still have that connection and I just. I sob.
I love them so much and this song is perfect for them thank you for introducing me to it!!!!!! I will never be over this song with them gOD
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what-kinda-fuckery · 4 years
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Hey so, I was one of the star struck falsettos stans that spent the forty dollars for the webinar, and I took notes (like a weirdo). So I decided I would share my funny moments and updates from the cast here!
- Host: Everyone should be keeping their audio off.
Christian: Oh alright!
Host: nO Christian not you
- Christians in Manhattan and his hair is back and he’s wearing a Superman t-shirt.
- Brandon is with his parents in NJ
- Stephanie and Brandon still love each other
- Brandon: Meat should be cooked just right
- Betsy: Stephanie are you in maple wood?
Stephanie: Well thank you for telling everyone where I am (she’s in NJ)
- Stephanie: Are you fucking kidding meee!!!
- Tracie is in LA, she looks like she’s in Costa Rica and I love her dog.
- Anthony’s VOICE IS LOW EVERYONES FREAKING OUT
they’re all talking about Anthony’s clear skin
- Andy Randy is in LA with a fresh haircut his boyfriend did it and he’s watching too much TV
Andrew: I’m watching this is America
Stephanie: SO GOOD
Andrew: SO GOOD
- Everyone’s having hard days
- Christian is acting out tracies dog’s pathetic bark and everyone’s like WHAT are you doing bc it looks like he’s about to throw up
- BETSY IS A WEEK AWAY FROM HAVINGA WHOLE CHILD
Betsy: What else do you do during a pandemic? Have a baby!
Andrew: Can I toss out another baby name? Celery.
Literally everyone: Goodnight Andrew goodbye!
- Christian is living with a girl (?) and playing board games instead of watching television
HE COOKS NOW EVERYONES PROUD OF HIM
Christian: yesterday I made pork filet en croute
Stephanie: I MADE PORK WITH SAGE AND APPLES ON WEDNESDAY
Stephanie: In mean girls they wear pink on wednesdays. In falsettos they make pork.
- I can’t get over Anthony’s voice
Again everyone returning to his literally perfect skin
- Stephanie: When watching four jews in a room in the beginning who’s in China?? I know the answer I just want to hear someone say it.
Andrew, with a thick accent: It was Bryna, in China, with a torn miniscus
- Christian: Did anything interesting make it on to the telecast between me and you? Andrew? Actually I dont remember I need to do my research.
Andrew: There’s been some strange comments about Christian and I- (AT THIS POINT IM WHEEZING)
HE MENTIONED THE TONY BONY
HE SAID IT WASNT A THING
HE DIDNT HAVE ONE
Andrew: No that’s not a thing that happened
Brandon: Andrew i want you to know that it’s okay if it was. It’s a safe space just the seven of us. (Lol)
- Bill Finn would take two steps into the room: “WROONG”
Stephanie: he wanted me to sing the end of I’m breaking down up the octave and I said #notmytrina
Brandon: #NOTMYTRINA
- Tracie what did you do during act 1
Tracie: Betsy and I sat in that dressing room for like an hour and a half
Andrew: You SANG the WHOLE SHOW TRACIE
- Betsy watched parts of the first act to feel like she was there
- Betsy sprained both her ankles at one point during the run and was a trooper anyways
Brandon reenacting Betsy limping during look look look look
Everyone dies laughing
Christians LAUGH makes me SO HAPPY
- Betsys screen is frozen like this: 🤨
Andrew: What if she went into labor??? (This is a common thread throughout the zoom)
- Anthony: I’m getting a lot of glitching so Stephanie is just like “HUH UH UH UH”
- Betsy comes back and everyone is like
YOU GUYS ITS COMING!!!
- They bought Andrew an ice cream for his birthday from the vending machine at rehearsal
- Andrew: The Hawaii crop top
Betsy: I would give anything to have that
- Tracie: it was very hard. Very precise bringing the blocks together
Brandon: Trying to be like oh my god we’re going to a funeral
Andrew: MY DEATH IT WAS MY DEATH
- fan question: What did the blocks weigh?
Stephanie: They were like thick yoga blocks. Not heavy but awkward shaped
Andrew: Significantly heavier when Anthony sat on them
Anthony: I just realized how much I got thrown around
Stephanie: Anthony were you proud of yourself? #proudofyou
Anthony: The one moment I was cringing was father and son
Christian: HERE WE GO *SLAPS TABLE*
Betsy: Anthony’s like BLAH BLAH BLAH blah my line BLAH BLAH BLAH my line BLAH BLAH
Christian: I LEAVE THE PAUSE IF YOU CANT GET IN THATS ON YOU
Anthony: I was blinking in that number like constantly
Christian: THE WHOLE THING LIKE A SALAMANDER
Oh Anthony.
- Andrew: I HAVE A STORY ABOUT CHRISTIAN BORLE. Tech for what more can i say. He was laying on me. We were shirtless in underpants under the blankets.
Christian: SLOWER
Andrew: he leaned over; He sniffed his armpit and said “I hope you like France”
EVERYONE DIES LAUGHING INCLUDING ME
Christian: i haven’t worn deodorant in 10 years true story
- Christian: i seem to remember holding our pillows and blankets pretending like we were partying on fyre island and Andrew said:
Andrew: WHATS YOUR NAME???
Christian: No no it was something like:
WHAT HOUSE ARE YOU STAYING IN??
Andrew: WHAT HOUSE ARE YOU STAYING IN???
Betsy: James lupine I feel like we’re ruining this show
- Andrew: The shenanigans were real but so was the sadness
Stephanie: We’re real and we’re funny what you gonna do
- Andrew talking about how hard the show was to do: Finding some liberty, It’s a hard world to live in all the time. It was a hard time especially for Christian. I would sometimes go home and cry for no reason
Brandon: Building up emotion with nowhere to put it
Betsy: then Lesbians come in and provide all the levity
Stephanie: Although Dr. Charlotte brings in horrible news
Tracie: Everything’s beautiful at what more can i say and I’m like not so fast
- Tracie always had a funny thing to say
- Who broke character the most on stage?
Anthony Stephanie and Christian
Anthony: it was when I said “I don’t want a bar mitzvah” and I spit in your face a lot and you went like *puts arms up* and someone at stage door was like very condescending like it’s not professional
Christian: Oh my bad we’re people sorry
- Stephanie wrote a line in the show “YOU HAVE PAINTINGS OF DICKS”
- James wanted her to cut off her finger during I’m breaking down
And turn around with a bandaged bloody finger
- Betsy’s nose bleeding during something bad is happening
And Tracie was like something BAD IS HAPPENING
Tracie: Christians throwing up right now
Betsy: Bloody Kleenex up the nose THE SHOW MUST GO ON
- Fan question: Stephanie how do you belt with a banana in your mouth
Christian: Practice practice practice
Stephanie: just shove it in your cheek. But Really that wasn’t supposed to happen
Anthony’s nickname in the rehearsal room was little bananas because he had to gather up all the pieces of stuff after Stephanie shoved the table over with her rear. Sometimes he didn’t have enough time to put it somewhere so he would just put the pieces of banana in his mouth and that’s where it came from
That’s why
- Andrew: Stephanie your glasses are very chic
Stephanie: Oh my gosh thank you *shocked*
- Betsy: Bill was like I’d rather DIE than change lyrics for the pbs special
FLaT aS a LaKe
- Cue everyone accidentally talking over each other and saying what at each other for 30 seconds
Christian: what? what? what?
Who is it?
What’s going on?
- If you could play anyone else in the show who would it be
Anthony said Mendel
Tracie said Mendel
Brandon said Trina
Andrew said marvin
Betsy said whizzer
Stephanie said Mendel
And I honestly couldn’t hear if Christian said anything whoops
- Brandon: If someone could at some point explain to me the Mendel eats dirt meme? People have been Asking me if Mendel eats dirt? I don’t think it’s about Trina Trina is not the dirt. I was overwhelmed. Can someone in the Q&A explain this? *A few seconds later* oh It was from a meme generator?
Christian: Greaat.
Brandon: It’s a fan fiction about Mendel eating dirt and getting aroused by it
Everyone: WHAT
- They still get fan art
Someone recreated the whole soundtrack 8bit and also with KAZOOS
- Brandon: CONGRATS CHRISTIAN ON LULOS WIN FOR LITTLE SHOP. If you haven’t seen Christian in little shop it’s revelatory I’m not just blowing smoke up your ass I have not laughed that hard in a while at the theatre
- Christian talking about little shop
Christian has a 12 inch Batman toy in his dressing room and he misses it
- Ticket prices were getting out of control before corona everyones hoping this will make a difference
Brandon and everyone think it should get more accessible
- Brandon: Hear hear I need a refill
- Stephanie: Your hair looks incredible Brandon (it did)
Christian: She’s been waiting to talk about it for 53 minutes
- Andrew: Well Betsy what I’m wondering is have you crowned yet??
Proceed everyone dying
Brandon, taking a picture of the screen: This moment will go down in history as When Betsy was asked if she was crowning
- Everyone mimicking zoom freezing by starting a sentence and freezing halfway through
- Christian: What new Steven sondheim musical are you excited about Anthony *devilish grin*
Anthony having no idea what Christian is talking about
Christian: Come on Anthony you know the answer. Ugh. The minds of the young. You’re smoking pot now aren’t you??
Christian: We have a lot of fun
- Andrew: I’m trying to get people to pay attention to me
- Christians pretending to be frozen
Cue a lot of yelling: Stephanie BRANDON STEPHANIE
NO CHRISTIAN
Everyone accusing each other of being frozen
NO YOURE FROZEN
- Andrew: Let’s all act like we’re frozen
Steph: I see Andrew acting like hes frozen
Betsy: Watching you do that is killing me
- Listening to the cast recording for the first time together
Stephanie: Why was I the a-hole that couldn’t be there???
Christian: That’s a question only you can answer
- Betsys husband came in everyones like BETSY LOOK OUT
Christian: that scared the shit out of me
- What is marvins last name and what was his line of work
Christian: we definitely said it at some point right? (They didnt) but he was in advertising. What was the last name? Gardens? O’Malley?
- Andrew: Betsys gone oh no
Betsy: I’m right here!!!
Andrew: She’s giving birth (again)
Stephanie: Betsy Wolfe is a ceiling
- Brandon: Welcome back Anthony. You’re here now.
Anthony singing merrily we roll along over Betsy trying to tell a story
Christian: STOP SMOKING POT IN YOUR BEDROOM ANTHONY
- Betsy: Steve (Steven Sondheim) comes to the door I call him steve
Into the woods is the reason Betsy is in theatre
- Betsy: Andrew was nervous singing at the tonys for Book of Mormon and he got dry mouth he sang like 😬I BELIEVE and he licked his lips so much during the song.
Brandon: Did you have a boner then too?
Andrew: GUYS DONT BE DICKS
Stephanie: It’ll be like dry mouth, boner
Andrew: BETSY YOU FUCKIN BITCH ITS ACTUALLY NOT THAT BAD
Stephanie: Bets maybe we should wrap it up
- Brandon sings MARRIAGE PROPOSAL
EVERYONE TELLING HIM TO STOP SINGING I took a video it was beautiful might post that later
- “Tracie Thomas from Lent!”
Tracie having stage fright
Tracie: Billy porter said “oh child we all forget the words” and walked away
- Anthony said WHO SHAT THE BED in four jews once
Anthony: That’s my contribution. Steph got her line, I got who shat the bed
- Steph: We lost andrew oh no
Christian: Um, we lost andrew ten minutes ago. Yeah when Brandon started singing
- Then Betsy sang a song by Bill Finn beautiful
- Steph: Wear your masks and eat pork on wednesdays
That was it!! I hope you enjoyed and people who were there if I got anything wrong that’s my human error it was hard to note everything I wanted to. Smooches! Byee
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ziracona · 3 years
Note
Ok so I don’t know how but it took you spelling out Phil and Vigo’s relationship and now it’s all I’ve been able to think about because?? The tragedy of it all??? And I was just wondering if you had any extra info about their relationship that you’d be willing to share? Cause honestly it sounds simultaneously so cute and so heart-wrenching and I am HERE for it. For real, every time I learn something new about the world of ILM I love it even more, thank you so much for that piece of perfection!
Oh absolutely!
I am very tempted to start posting the chunks of Signifying Nothing I already have but I am simultaneously like “But you know you’d have to update slower rn” and so I keep balking, especially since I am writing New Dawn Fades too rn :’-] — We shall see. Anway! I am sorry it took so long to answer this I had a massive project I only finally finished this afternoon (I’m dying), but I have been very excited abt this because I adore Vigo so much!
Ahhh Vigo and Philip. They really said “Sooo...enemies to lovers speedrun?” And then did so fast they claimed a new high score.
I am not sure what specifically you’d like to know about (feel free to ask specifics if there are some! :D ) so I am just gonna throw out some random facts.
Vigo is from Norway, in the 1910s-30s originally. Philip from Nigeria in the 1960s-1970s, then Wisocnsin in the early 80s, so while they’re both gay men, it was never safe for either of them to be out. They also lived in fairly isolated places and were the only people like themselves they knew. This lead to them, once they were already traveling together in the realm for other reasons, having the most awkward flirting style. You know that “Bro, it’s just a dream”—“*nervously* Yeah I’m not gay, I wouldn’t fuck you”—“...You wouldn’t? :’ (“ “...I mean, unless you wanted to.” Vine? Both of them trying to figure out if the other likes men and/or them. They both think they can be subtle. They can’t. Just the other one is so fucking paranoid and anxious about this whole sitch the net effect is the same.
They are both fools who follow their gut instincts irrationally, but this worked out really well for them because if they weren’t the both would have killed the other during their first two real interactions.
They are super in love. They were so in love that even after ILM, when Vigo is both dead and someone Philip can’t even remember, he is still in love with him so much that he’s going to spend the rest of his life with him, whether that means trying to find a way to the realm again and the void just in case, or simply living how Vigo died in the hopes he’d get to, and spending quiet days talking to his ghost.
Vigo’s original character goal and life purpose on Signifying Nothing is the take the Entity down/beat it and to save everyone in the realm. Philip’s original character goal is to simply be allowed to live an okay life where the violence stops and he neither hurts nor is hurt by others, and maybe is happy sometimes—he just wants to be a decent man. Vigo dies and fails to obtain his own goal utterly, and basically achieves the opposite, as does Philip. Extremely cruelly. In In Living Memory, or rather, In Living Memory itself, is a manuscript Vigo puts together as a husk in the void, memorializing the events in the realm, and fulfilling Philip’s goal for him—carving into reality the truth he is a decent man who just wanted to not hurt or be heart, and giving immportal remembered meaning to that. As well as recording his eventual happiness with his new family. It ends once Vigo’s goals are assured (Philip is really going to be both happy and alright), and his connection to them outside the realm is failing and he won’t be able to observe anymore. Similarly, Philip throws away his own goals and future, and completes Vigo’s character arc for him, sacrificing himself in Memento Mori to achieve Vigo’s goal—beating the Entity and saving everyone in the realm—for him in his stead. A grand fate far beyond what Philip would have picked for himself.
But in the end, they both achieve the others’ life goal for them, since they could not do it themselves, and in doing so, kind of fulfil their own. Philip gives up everything to fight and win, and in doing so, finds a happy life to go home to. Vigo records Philip’s journey and everyone else’s and in doing so becomes the direct inspiration and motivation for the eventual escape of everyone in the realm. So. In simple terms. In loving Philip, Vigo does find a way to save everyone after all. And in loving Vigo, Philip finds life as a good man who many days gets to be happy.
I am gonna go cry now.
Uhhhhh what else. I’m really tempted to kinkshame Vigo but I’m not gonna do it right now. I will say his dumb ass spent like a whole week with Philip, who was armed with his sickle and not pretending not to be a killer, just conpletely obliviously believing him to be a rando, because Vigo has a great mind but only if the focus setting is switched on and sadly he does not control the focus choices.
Philip is much taller than Vigo because he’s seven feet tall and Vigo is Norwegian so he keeps trying to convince me he’s “no no actually 5’12””, but I am 99% sure that’s a lie and he’s actually 5’9”.
Vigo is a terrifyingly good fighter. He conjours things out of the fog really well. His main item is a summonded like made from light drum because he came here trying to function as a noadi to help the people captured by an evil spirit. It looks like a shield bc of the size and shape, so most people assume it is, and that was kind of meant to be its purpose, but it gets used as an offensive weapon waaay more (I mean, he’s here to fight spiritual warfare what do you epect from the man?). Philip, who runs around with a scythe, like, the most death-lookin weapon of all, uses his sickle for primarily defense/as a shield. This makes them very funny to watch but also extremely formidable as a tag-team in battle.
Even though Norwegian is not a super affectionate langaube interestingly, and kind of the opposite, Vigo is a very quickly affectionate person by nature and is very liberal with the terms of endearment. This used to annoy Alex and Benedict, but like, in the way where a friend annoys you but you kind of don’t really hate it. Philip really liked it. Vigo used to call him Kjære a lot.
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jiminrings · 3 years
Note
petition for stem koo to do all the things for oc he originally said no one does (make her lunchboxes, makes her cheerful...) bc i think that’s a beautiful redemption arc
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cold senior!y/n x stem major!koo masterlist :D
jungkook's day one of his redemption agenda doesn't go that well in the end
"namjoon!!! my man. got any updates for me?"
seokjin strolls coolly on the way to his office, hair slicked back and his dress shirt definitely missing more than a few buttons
what's head admin gonna do??? dress-code him???
fire him???? PLS HE'D BE BETTER OFF!!!!
jin makes student affairs his bitch,,, not the other way around
"for the last time, i am nOt your secretary!!" namjoon stresses as he ceases his typing just to glare at him
he's the university registrar and everyone needs to go through him and at this point he's like a historical landmark from how he's made impact in less than two years
and he and seokjin graduated from the same batch!!!! they're the uncanny always pair for the subjects they shared together
it was definitely weird but functional lol cause one is uptight yet hardworking and the other's relaxed yet smart
sue them for working in the same place they swore they'd never go back to after graduation </3
"if you say-"
"some kid's been waiting for you even before i opened the office. made him sit inside but i just told him that he'd be expelled if he even tries to touch your coffee machine."
namjoon says even before jin could finish the sentence, clearly holding that in until the last minute
jin's obviously a lil annoyed because he's starting work as early as now but the way that joon laid all that out on him is a highlight for him
"thanks. knew you're a secretary for me first and a registrar second."
"no. i'm a national citizen before-"
alright alright he's not listening anymore
this bETTER be important because jin has to hold out his morning routine for whoever this kid is
"what can i possibly do for you today?" he rubs his eyes in preparation, intentionally dragging his steps because just looking at how near he is to his work computer gives him vertigo
"mr. kim!!!"
no
there is no way
there is no fATHOMABLE way that this has got to be happening to seokjin right now
"..... jungkook. what a pleasure."
he sits on his chair, voice gritted and monotone and he could just feel his eye twitching, his clenched fist under his deck now flipping off the kid in secret
it's a last-minute realization that he grasps that jungkook doesn't know you're his friend and it presents some really unique vantage points
like the time that seokjin recounted about a ridiculous student's filing for theft of his lunchboxes and he turned out to be your crush
or when he used his student affairs capabilities and pulled up resources left and right when jungkook broke your heart then seriously contemplated about messing up his academic record
or that time when he delivered a high and sleepy you to bed and then heard the entire conversation (if you could even call it that) between yoongi and this fucking nerd
"i need your help, mr. kim. you're the closest one to me i could ask!!" jungkook pleads desperately, the big doe eyes not really inducing an effect on him whatsoever lmao
"mhmm. i may not be the person for the job. counseling is right next door."
jin hums without even attempting to get jungkook to elaborate because for all he knows, his services aren't exactly open for people who hurt his friends >:(
(a guy once bumped shoulders with yoongi twice on the same day with aTTITUDE!!! and seokjin just dismissed the dude's concerns when a prof of his, who's a buddy of jin's, suddenly gave him an F)
seokjin IS student affairs
“no, no. you’re the only one who can help me!! you see, i-i just feel this brotherly connection with you and-“
“we talked once.”
god what did you used to see in this kid??
a crybaby aND an easily-attached personality to him? god it’s like jungkook’s just asking jin to pick on him
jungkook doesn’t seem to pick up how jin’s making it obvious he really doesn’t want to be of help if it has something to do with him
he likes interrupting and jin’s just the perfect match to interrupt him even earlier so now they just sound like one of those dubsmash snippets
“MR. KIM!!! how do you make lunchboxes? i don't know how.”
jeez where are his manners :O aren’t nerds like him supposed to worship the ground that admins walk on,,,
but what did pique his attention is the content of what jungkook just said
.... lunchboxes?
jin doesn’t want to give the kid benefit of the doubt because the last time he did that, you got hurt!!!!
if he has to hear hyeji’s name one more time, he’d really waste no time in stripping jungkook’s name from the honor roll
“remember that time i thought someone was stealing my lunchboxes?” he quizzes jin like it’s his job, clueless how he’s poking the bear even more with where he decides to go with this, “yeah. turns out no one was.”
was that not made clear the first time around!!!!!! he knows for a fact that a uni student would trade a classmate for a pack of gum but nO ONE would go for stealing a lunchbox
no one wakes up one day and decides that they’d steal a lunchbox. literally none
“but then this random girl claimed that it was hers a-and well i-...”
kook pauses to gauge jin’s reaction, clearly seeing now the one brow that’s raised at him
oh so if jungkook just asked him how to make a lunchbox, and he called h-word random,,,, then that would mean-
“i may have hurt the original giver of my lunchboxes at the process.”
.... that means he’s asking how to make a lunchbox for you
well that was a pleasant surprise
seokjin snorts briefly at that, dryly chuckling with his eyes widening to stress out his “non-threat” that’s pretty mUCH a threat
“wow. i might just give you a sanction for that.”
does he think jungkook’s a good person? lol he has to think about that for a month
was he wrong for hurting you that way? ultimately yes
but did he think at some point that jungkook’s completely heartless and wouldn’t try to redeem himself to his senior? no, not completely
but is he still on your team, regardless if the kid begs for mercy and you forgive him? yea a hundred percent :D yoongi and seokjin could never be brought out from your circle
"and you're doing this why?"
this is a no-brainer question for jungkook but the question still spooks him, feeling the chills at his neck that responding to seokjin is like a sTEPPING STONE when it comes to you
lmao if only he knew
"i uh, i just really wanna make this right. i messed up completely and it's pretty much unforgivable, but i atleast wanna try and give my best even if she doesn't forgive me, y'know?"
interesting
"mhmm. right, right."
???
he's still mad but he appreciates that jeon's doing the bare minimum of redeeming himself
speaking of, the poor kid looks like he's pissing himself because he may have just embarrassed himself with how long the silence stretches out
maybe,,, just maybe jin's gonna try and be a bridge this time
but like as soon as jungkook lacks for a fourth of a second, seokjin would BURN that bridge faster than a blink
"well first of all, you buy a lunchbox."
RIGHT RIGHT
:O
jungkook grabs a literal pocket notebook and jin pretends he didn't see that because WHO the hell does that!!!!
"of course... okay, proceed!! i'm taking notes," jungkook nods in understanding, jotting down the very important advice of not ordering from online because you can't smell the material through a screen
p.s. smelling containers before you buy them is a VITAL thing to do!! it already tells you about the quality at the first sniff
"are you buying one?"
"buying one for every day of the week. i'm thinking if i should get extras too-
"good idea. i recommend buying eight."
alright seokjin's mentioning some very specific colors and schemes and jungkook's not complaining!!!
MAYBE HE'S ONTO SOMETHING!!!
"what meals should i make? i don't even know what she likes!! and even if i knew what, how would i make it?"
why is his heart racing
yoongi may have taught you how to do your taxes but jin taught you how to cook food that's more than four steps!!!
he taught you how to not flinch at all when you're frying and that's the equivalent of raising you to be the woman that you are now <3
look at him and yoongi being your best friends!! teaching you about taxes and being unnerved at cooking oil and busting out a smoke ring or two <3
in fact, the lunches you've cooked for jungkook are all inspired and derived by seokjin!!!
the fact that jungkook's plan isn't bad and the way everything pieces together with his insight,,,, goosebumps luv
"....hypothetically? what i think she'd like?"
jungkook eagerly nods with stars in his eyes, fingers gripping onto his pen for dear life as he tries to channel all his listening techniques into this lecture
"get a bigger notepad."
:O
wow
"look at you!!" yoongi gushes the moment he sees you, waiting at you from the front door
you're going back to your classes again :D
you don't look as worse as you did four days ago!! you're not as sluggish and as animated too
"please don't," you snort as yoongi doesn't seem to stop looking at you like you've saved the world, giving no fight when he insists on carrying your backpack to your first class of the day
the past four days,, yeah they were undoubtedly rough
you slept as much as you could and for the moments you weren't dejected enough to be awake, you spent it surrounding yourself with seokjin and yoongi as much as possible
that's the beauty of hanging out them!!! you're not required to have a single thought lmao
except for the time when yoongi wondered aloud how eels even live and die (or if they even do???) in the first place and that sent everyone in a spiral and you didn't think of jungkook for a single seconds
you're not intimidated to go back to regular programming or with the fact that it's nOT unlikely you'd see a glimpse of jungkook in the hall and such
but that does mean that even if you're the bigger person, you're still gonna avoid him for as long as you could
speaking of!!!! you're looking for the person now that you're eager to find
"taehyung!!"
there he is :D you'd recognize that fluffy mop of permed hair anywhere
"y/n!!"
tae jumps over chairs in excitement to finally see you again after being so worried for you, engulfing you in a hug immediately
alright you see why yoongi thinks he's a golden retriever
you're clearly not a touchy-feely person but you'd let this one pass,, tae helped you (even indirectly) throughout your downtime anyways
"thank you so much for the cookies. i tried taking smaller bites just because i didn't wanna have them disappear that easy," you confess sheepishly, knowing how you had to pull the i just got my heart broken like two days ago multiple times so the two menaces would stop stealing from your stash
:D
jungkook's excited!!!! seokjin may have given him a tip that "he felt it in his gut" that you were gonna go to class today
he came a little late because he wanted to perfect the very loaded lunchbox that's in his backpack right now
oh weird
you're not in your usual chair
bUT jungkook sees a glimpse of your hair and he's certain that you're there and his heart may be beating out of his ribcage
a baby peach lunchbox with a sticker (of what seokjin said he thought you'd like) on the middle of the lid :D
pork katsudon with furikake rice aND coffee jelly pudding on the side!!! it was definitely pressure-racking to strictly adhere to jin's recipe but god does it look worth it
jungkook's only did miniature taste tests on it and he had to stop himself from devouring the lunch that he's made specifically for you
the lunchbox itself is tied neatly with a silk wrap, adding his touch of sewing your name visibly on it aND there's a scribble taped to the lid too
god jungkook really can't wait to make it up to you
sheesh that was one of THEE longest lectures you've ever felt you had
it was actually the same amount of time it's always been but maybe you've been out of practice from just staying at your dorm for days
tae's great company but he could be a little bit chatty!!! you just nod when you feel his voice go up and he apparently gets excited by that easily
.... he apparently also has a small bladder and he told you that within the whole hour of class
"hold on. i gotta pee before next period. go without me!!!' taehyung hurriedly slings his backpack to his arm, looking ridiculous in a rush
tae's sometimes unintentionally funny because you don't even share next period anyways
you're on your way to the exit when a shiny scarf catches the corner of your eye, having to squint at it because wow does it look pretty
is that-
is that your nAME???
you pick it up before you could even rationalize it, realizing then what it was wrapping when you feel the warmth on your hands
:")
"sorry i forgot my headband!!!"
taehyung stumbles back into the room, catching his breath to run back to his seat and fetch the headband he took from his hair to play with awhile ago
he looks shocked to see what's on your hands, flicking his gaze between you and the item but he doesn't think much of it
wOW that's a really shiny scarf!!!
"tae?"
"hmm yeah? what's up?"
he's about to jog back to the comfort room because he hasn't really relieved himself yet, not bearing to leave his headband in the room when anyone could snatch it up
you raise your lunchbox, a thankful gaze on your eyes that looks so close to crying which is why tae's mORE than lost now
"thanks for the lunch."
..
.....
jungkook could only helplessly watch.
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okaybutlikeimagine · 4 years
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really weird hc but i think steve never cries, like it’s not that he doesn’t want to he just can’t??? he’s filled with emotions and he knows he technically should be crying but he just can’t. But billy on the other hand, if you asked him he’d deny it but he cries all. the. time. when he’s angry. when he’s sad. when he’s stressed. when he’s happy and laughing. he just can’t control it.
This is such an interesting headcanon and I DEFINITELY agree!!!! I think it makes perfect sense!!
Bc the way I think about it, Steve’s life has been a lot more performative than Billy’s has, if that makes any sense? Like, I think of Steve’s parents and I think of the kind of terrible people who had a kid just to 1. Pass down the name and 2. Say they have the “perfect family”. Like, they toted Steve out for parties just like Daisy does in Great Gatsby and then they’d hand him off to the sitter or the nanny or the maid or whatever. They didn’t actually want to raise a kid and understand that kid as a person, they wanted a trophy to say: “See this? This proves our relationship is strong and our marriage was worth it.”
And then, in the background, before Steve would be dragged off to whatever private function he was being forced and dressed to attend, his mom would grab him harshly and tightly around his little shoulders and kneel down to look him right in the eye and say: “You behave yourself, understand? There are going to be very important clients there and if you bother us while we’re working, you’re going to be grounded for a whole week. No, two. No toys, TV, nothing. You hear me?” And just imagine a little Steve, about age 5, blinking owlishly at his mom and nodding his head bc of course he can hear her, she’s right in his face, but the only thing he knows about “clients” is that they make his parents yell at each other and that they’re the reason his parents never read him bedtime stories or tuck him in at night
 And I really don’t know a whole lot about like… the lives of the rich and famous, but I just can’t help but imagine Steve’s parents going to parties with the other “elite” in the area. And I use the term “elite” loosely bc i mean… let’s face it…. They still live in Hawkins. They’re definitely rich but it’s not like they’re rubbing elbows with high society over here. They’re the kind of rich, snobby, stuck up people who think they’re better than the people they share a community with. It’s the reason they’re not home very often: they hate being reminded about the fact that they haven’t moved out of Hawkins.
So they go to lots of rich, stuck up parties. And they hold Steve up like a trophy to their friends about how they have a kid already and “where’s yours, Patricia? Oh, don’t have one yet? Are things alright with you and Greg? Oh, just wondering, because if you don’t have a kid yet, well…. Maybe something’s wrong at home…”
and so Steve, with fresh threats swimming in his mind, stands there and smiles and takes all the cheek pinches and head pats even though he’s only a child and is about to fall asleep on his feet because they’ve been walking around meeting people for hours and the other kids won’t play with him because they think he’s “boring” or “stupid” or “poor” (which doesn’t make sense to him bc he’s the richest kid in his preschool as far as he’s aware. He figures the preschools must be different here.) so he puts on a mask even for the other kids. He pretends he doesn’t like playing in the mud or collecting bugs or making jokes about boogers. He puts aside acting like a kid to act like these kids just so he can play with them. Sometimes it works.
And so I think he learned not to cry at a very young age. Honestly, i dunno if you’ve heard about it, but I’m channeling The Who’s Tommy over here. Like, the whole “kid is threatened not to speak about this thing, that he didn’t see this thing, and that he didn’t hear this thing and thus goes deaf, blind, and mute”. And obviously a little less dramatic than that, but Steve’s always been told not to cry. When he would cry he’d get punished. It’s like a weird Pavlovian effect. Ever since he was a kid he was asked to put on a show for everyone, told not to pout or whine or cry, and now he just…. Can’t. He almost fears it. He hears his parents threats, even now at the age of 18, and smiles and laughs rather than cries. And sometimes he cries… that night that Nancy called him bullshit and told him she didn’t love him he went home and ripped a blanket she had (apparently lovelessly) gifted him and broke his lamp and accidentally sliced his foot on the glass of the lightbulb…. and cried and… and it felt like failure. It was only a couple of tears, hot and angry and rolling slowly down his face and he let his throat catch fire as he held everything else back. He was angry with himself at that point, more than anything. He looked himself in the mirror and heard his father’s words of “A Harrington never cries. Are you a true Harrington?” and sucked it all back in and did whatever he could to take his mind off of it, even though everything he did always ended with him fuming about the words over and over again and caused him to end up punching pillows and angrily drinking all the beer out of the fridge.
But Billy’s different.
Billy is a volcano. A volcano of every single emotion you can think of. He experiences them all violently and viciously and they take over his system until his body physically can’t hold back from crying. We SEE him cry multiple times in the show!!! And i like to think it’s bc rather than be toted around, he’s been locked in. where Steve’s parents drag Steve around to different social functions, Neil locks Billy up so he- and no one else -has to look at him. Steve is forced to be around others and put on a mask and Billy is forced to be alone, with just himself and his thoughts. He doesn’t need to mask himself when he’s alone.
And that’s not to say that Billy doesn’t also put on a show for others- because he most definitely does. I think a lot of what he does is performative bc he feels he needs to and his thought process for it lines up with Steve’s for himself: he’s just not good enough. He wasn’t good enough for his mom to stay, he wasn’t good enough for his dad to love in his mother’s absence, he wasn’t and isn’t good enough for anything. So he puts on a show of this big tough guy and he manipulates people and he calls it entertainment.
And this isn’t to say that he didn’t get yelled at for crying, either! Bc he definitely did. He’s gotten hit a few times for tears in his eyes but it was always followed with being locked in his room and being told that he was “embarrassing to watch”... and in the four walls of his room he cried more. Bc growing up, the one thing he found relief in was being sent to his room or even having his room in the first place: it gave him a space to be alone and let his emotions out. And he never tried to, his body always just did it for him. Bc crying is often a very visceral thing, and also a very natural and very human thing. It releases chemicals in your body to help soothe you and lord KNOWS Billy needs to soothe himself bc once his mom left, no one did it for him. His body realizes the emotions that aren’t being sorted and his mind knows when it’s safe (when he’s alone, when Neil’s turned and walking away, when no one can hear) and it cries. I just imagine Billy on constant vibrate, brimming with emotions and filled to the edge with too many things with everything with all of it and he just cries because there’s so few outlets for him. His body has grown accustomed to taking care of itself in that way. And so when he’s had too much (and the threshold on some days if very small), he rushes to his room and slams the door and as soon as it’s latched he’s near drowning in tears bc he needs release.
And let me tell you- it freaks the fuck out of Steve.
Because like you said, Steve just doesn’t cry. And the first time Billy and Steve have sex, Billy cries as he orgasms and Steve freaks. out. He thinks he did something wrong and he’s fretting over Billy and his heart is racing and he’s fighting with himself about if he should hold Billy’s face or step about 5 feet away from him because holy shit what happened??
And Billy feels like an idiot but there’s no stopping his body because he’s so overwhelmed by feeling so good and it’s been a long time coming for him and Steve and after all of that anger and animosity between each other, it was just too much and he cries. And he punches Steve while he’s crying, trying his best to growl but hiccuping around the words instead as he says: “Don’t look at me like that.”
“I’m so sorry Billy, holy shit! What do I do?!” 
“Go get me a tissue, you dumbass!”
And he’s sniffling and blows his nose loud and Steve is in awe that Billy is still such a hardass even with tears running down his eyes.
And this happens a LOT. Every time Billy and Steve have sex, Billy tears up after he orgasms. It’s not always full on waterworks like the first time, but his eyes always water as he lays there with Steve, body lit up and hot like a fucking campfire, and he lays there and breathes and a tear rolls down his cheek and Steve has gotten so used to it that he leans over Billy and kisses the tear right at his cheekbone and whispers how beautiful he is. (and that usually makes Billy tear up even more, to which he shoves Steve with whatever strength he has left and tells him to shut his mouth)
The first time they tell each other “I love you” it’s the same thing. Billy whispers “I love you, too” and there go his tears. His chest heaves and he cries into Steve’s collarbone, gripping Steve’s shirt and Steve just kind of chuckles a bit and rubs Billy’s back and maybe cracks a joke about how he’s “such a sap” and Billy tilts his head so he can bite at Steve’s shoulder and make the boy yelp.
And the first time Billy catches Steve about to cry, he sees that the boy is about to run away. Bc he’s taken notice to the fact that Steve doesn’t cry and he hasn’t brought it up more than twice bc Steve is obviously anxious when he talks about it but Billy gets worried for him bc Steve always acts like he’s okay and Billy knows that’s not good. So when he catches Steve’s eyes watering and then Steve turning to lock himself away somewhere, he grabs the boy in the most forceful hug he can manage so that he can’t squirm away and hide himself and he says: “Don’t run away from me. Are you gonna cry?”
“Billy-”
“Then do it. You’re not a robot.”
“Billy stop I-”
“You’re human, you fucking dumbass.”
“Don’t call me-”
“It’s okay.”
And that makes Steve’s chest heave. He sucks so much air in he squeaks and his chest pushes against Billy’s own and Billy grabs tighter and nuzzles his head into Steve’s neck and whispers.
“You’re safe, Pretty Boy.”
And he stands there and he lets Steve cry. Lets himself be whatever physical and mental support Steve needs as he finally, finally let’s his body take over and just cries.
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