#and when you live like that especially due to your own choices anything that seems like a luxury you view with a certain level of contempt

[torturedpoetemotions]

Actually the implications of John also being bisexual are so fucking tasty to me because like. OG John has no support system and no protection against the world except his own perceived strength so he learns to ferret out anything that can possibly be seen as weakness to those around him and that includes any affection or attraction he might feel towards men because nothing screams "stay in your fucking closet" like spending all your time around a fringe subculture of serial killing doomsday preppers in the Midwest during the Reagan era.

By the time he notices Dean starting to look a little too long at boys his age, he's probably convinced himself that whatever he felt (still feels but ignores) was a temporary youthful indiscretion, and of course Dean can't afford those, doesn't get to have those, he's got to be a soldier. He's got to be a better soldier than John, even.

I dunno I've just had enough conversations with family members who are loudly but somehow also mildly homophobic and yet say or do things that make me *eyeballs emoji* not to think this is not only possible but arguably likely.

#supernatural #the winchesters #spn #spnwin #john winchester #shifting my headcanon of john to the type of person who doesn't think of himself as homophobic if he ever things about it at all #and would even probably try to stop a hate crime if he saw one happening right in front of him #(or likes to think he would) #but also views his own queer desire--and thus that of others--with suspicion and contempt #like something frivolous that he simply doesn't have the luxury to pursue as a Real Man in the Real World with Real Responsibilities #and when you live like that especially due to your own choices anything that seems like a luxury you view with a certain level of contempt #so he's like 'heh must be nice to have time for boyfriends' in the most condescending and degrading way imaginable #in the same way he probably treated sam's affinity for academia #in fact i'd argue a lot of what we see from dean with regards to the way he mocks sam for certain things is probably just echoes of john #and what's REALLY crazy-making is the way most of these things dean mocks sam for early on later prove to be things DEAN actually does enjo #dean likes to read and he loves chick flicks and he gets excited about tomatoes and enjoys dressing up nice #dean learned early on that certain things were not acceptable for a Real Man from john bullying him out of doing them #and he does the same to sam #and one of the things he consistently mocks sam for in the beginning is his perceived sexuality #and sure we could just chalk that up to stereotyping but EVEN THEN that jives with the idea that #john simply put his own queer desire in a box labeled 'weaknesses real men don't have' along with idk a love of reading and salads and bein #emotionally vulnerable and sincere with people you love #and then he told Dean 'this is the box of forbidden things' #and dean the ever-dutiful son learned his lesson well

[lovesickonmybed]

to hands between legs | 18+

masterlist | xo masterlist | info about palestine | donate to gaza

pairing | bully!ellie williams x loser!virgin!reader

synopsis | ellie williams made your high school experience a living hell, but once you got to college you thought you were finally free…until running into her at a frat party where she humiliates you just like it’s high school all over again.

warnings | 18+ MDNI! bullying, wedgies, dub-con, underage drinking, panty kink, degradation, humiliation, fingering, virgin reader, mommy kink.

word count | 4.4k

a/n | if wedgie kinks make you uncomfortable or seem cringe to you then please keep scrolling and let me indulge in my weird little kinks thank you! also i dropped out of college so if any of this is inaccurate i'm sorry!! i urge you to not buy any of the last of us games, including the remaster as the creator, neil druckmann is a zionist. the second game is based off of the israeli occupation in palestine and you can learn more about that here.

“Dude you are not wearing those to the party tonight!” Your roommate Seline scoffs looking you up and down as you stand in your underwear looking through your clothes in an attempt to find something semi-decent for your first party of the year. You’ve got on a plain white bra and a pair of white hanes panties that sit high up on your waist. 

You turn back to look at her with an annoyed sneer on your face, “They’re called underwear for a reason, they’ll be under my clothes, where no one can see them. I doubt it’ll make a difference, I’m not exactly trying to get laid tonight, especially not by any of those guys.”

“Wearing granny panties at any time besides your time of the month is just…wrong! There’s no way those are comfortable, like seriously I see you pick your wedgie like 20 times a day, just grow up and switch to thongs already.” Your cheeks heat up with embarrassment and you slip on a black skort that stops at your mid thigh before turning back to face your roommate. 

“I do not pick that many wedgies, stop being so dramatic! A thong would just be worse, I don’t want a string up my ass all day…” You retort.

“So instead of a string you want that itchy fabric to bunch up and give you a cottontail? Got it…this is why you haven’t gotten laid yet…” Seline says, side eyeing you.

“I really don’t need this right now, I’m wearing my comfortable and reliable panties and you can have fun telling a frat guy to stop pulling on your thong strings when he’s had too much to drink.”

“My thong is getting taken off by a frat guy tonight, not pulled up, honey. Now hurry up and get dressed so we can go, maybe if you pick the right top someone can look past your choice in underwear,” Seline chuckles.

You roll your eyes playfully and decide on a cropped white tank top, you slip on a pair of black heeled boots and a light wash denim jacket to finish off the look. You want to look alright just in case, you haven’t had the best luck romantically and definitely not sexually since arriving at school. You’ve made out with a few girls at parties but due to your own nerves you haven’t done anything past feeling them up and trying to not cum immediately when their hand is on your thigh. You swear you got more action from your high school bully…

“Come on, if you make me even later than we already are then I’m gonna lose it!” Your roommate commands as you grab your bag from off your bed. You’re not exactly the party type and you sure as hell weren’t in high school, then again you never got a chance to go to parties in high school thanks to Ellie fucking Williams for making you a pariah. You still have no clue what you did to the girl for her to target you as viciously as you did, you barely knew her…maybe she wanted to establish dominance when she arrived in Jackson, sure being the new kid can be tough but it doesn’t exactly call for you to make someone miserable everyday of their life. It started with a shoulder check in the hallway and escalated to you having to budget out having to replace panties on an almost weekly basis due to the waistband ripping wedgies Ellie loved to dish out. 

College was a fresh start for you, a way to escape your past as ‘Wedgie Girl’ and to finally make some friends…but thanks to your busy class schedule and your social awkwardness it’s proven harder than you expected. Your roommate Seline was kind enough to introduce you to some of her friends and you’re pleading with whatever forces are out in the universe that some of them will be there tonight to hang with you when your roommate abandons you for some dick from a sweet, but ultimately brainless frat boy. 

“Do you know if anyone we know is gonna be at the party?” You ask Seline, nervously playing with the hem of your skirt as you both walk the path to the nearby frat house. 

“Uh, I think Taylor mentioned she might be there…I’m not sure when though. But hey, if she’s not I’m sure you’ll find someone to spend your night with if I disappear,” She smiles, nudging your arm with her shoulder playfully. 

“More like when you disappear…”

“Hey! I don’t always disappear!” Seline scoffs.

“If there’s dick from a himbo you do,” you retort.

“Can you blame me? They’re always the sweetest in and out of bed, I can’t help that I like a dumb guy who will actually take care of me after we fuck instead of some asshole who’ll just take my panties after!” On multiple occasions freshman year Seline had some of her favorite pairs stolen by business majors, it was truly unfortunate. 

“Dude I swear to god I’m on a mission to get your panties back tonight, you know I love stealing shit from frat guys. I’m gonna steal your panties back,” you joke to Seline.

“I don’t want them back, they’re probably crusted with cum by now!” Seline laughs.

“Oh my god! Why would you put that image in my head, jesus christ!”

“Sorry, sorry!” Seline is out of breath as she apologizes. 

You reach the lawn of the frat house and you and Seline look at one another.

“If you plan to hookup with someone and stay at their place, text me and share your location, deal?” You say to Seline, making sure to establish a plan for tonight.

“Deal. Same goes for you, babe,” she smirks.

“We both know I won’t be hooking up with anyone but the optimism is appreciated, Seline.”

Seline laughs and throws her arm around your waist as you walk into the party, music playing loudly, the house filled with college students with drinks in their hands. 

You comb the crowd to look for anyone you may recognize but you’re unsuccessful, you frown and pull yourself closer to Seline for comfort. You cup her ear, “I don’t see Taylor yet.” 

“Let me text her and see when she’ll be here,” Seline responds as she pulls out her phone and pulls up Taylor’s contact, she shoots her a text and while she waits on a response y’all go into the kitchen to find something to drink. 

You separate from Seline and look around at all your options, you decide to just grab a Whiteclaw, ignoring how douchey it makes you feel to be seen drinking one. You crack it open and take a sip as Seline pours herself a shot. You lean against the counter as people come up to greet Seline, you feel out of place at this party but you try to ignore the feeling and take another sip.

“Hey, is it okay if I go with them?” Seline motions to the two girls standing where she just was, “I don’t want to leave you alone but we’ve been meaning to catch up for awhile y’know?”

You sigh and bite the inside of your cheek, “Yeah…it’s okay. Go catch up,” you give her a fake smile and in response she gives you a real one.

“I appreciate it, I’m sorry. If you need anything just text me, okay?” 

“Got it. Go have fun for me,” you smile.

Seline gives you a quick hug and turns to the other girls, walking off to the backyard together.

You stay where you are in the kitchen, bobbing your head to the music and mostly aimlessly scrolling on your phone when people watching gets boring. You’re broken out of your trance by a familiar laugh, “Holy shit…you actually made it out of Jackson? I’m shocked, truly.” Even if you hadn’t looked up you’d know exactly who was talking to you. Standing in front of you, a beer in hand, is Ellie Williams. 

You gasp softly and take a long swig from your drink, “I-You-”

“I didn’t know you went here, how’d you even get in?” Ellie asks, taking a step towards you. You can smell the woodsy cologne that’s been her signature scent since high school, she’s wearing a dark green flannel over a black tank top and a pair of black jeans. 

“I-I’m smart…I guess…” You manage to say. You regret it instantly, face heating up when you realize how stupid you sound. 

“Mhm, yeah of course…” She steps closer to you, setting her hand next to your hip on your counter, trapping you slightly as she gets in your personal space, “You know,” she chuckles, “Your roommate is a real dick for letting you leave the dorm like this…”

“What? What’s wrong with what I’m wearing?” You ask, instantly regressing back to the insecure high schooler you were just two years ago.

Ellie smirks, wetting her lips with her tongue, “Nothing, I’m just fucking with you, loser. You’re just as easy to mess with as you were in highschool…” 

You look down, avoiding eye contact, and shrink into yourself, “Why…why are you doing this? We’re not in highschool anymore, Ellie. I mean…who even bullies people in college?”

Ellie doesn’t appreciate your attempt to stand up for yourself, “Someone who sees a loser in desperate need of help…you still wear granny panties?” She bites her lip as she watches your face contort into an embarrassed look.

“I…I don’t know what you’re talking about…” You wrap your arms around yourself, trying to self soothe. 

Ellie pauses for a minute, turning around to scope out the house. She grabs your wrist and starts to pull you along with her.

“Hey! What do you think you’re doing?!” You yell, trying to tug your wrist out of her grip, it’s a futile attempt as she’s always been much stronger than you. 

“Shut up,” Ellie commands, continuing to pull you along with her to the upstairs of the house. The partygoers hanging out on the staircase pay you no mind, continuing their conversations without a care in the world. Ellie pulls you down a hallway, opening one of the doors and pushing you inside, causing you to fall to your knees. Ellie locks the door as you scramble to your feet, mostly out of fear of what substances could be on this carpet.

Ellie turns around to face you, “Take your skirt off.”

Your eyebrows furrow in confusion, “What?”

“Are you stupid? Take your goddamn skirt off,” Ellie sneers.

“What? Why? I-I’m not taking off my skirt for you! And I’m not wearing granny panties!” 

“Then lift up your skirt and prove it. You’ve got a little cottontail poking out of the back of your skirt by the way…nice hanes,” She laughs and pushes you back, causing you to stumble.

“You’re a sadistic bitch!” You exclaim, backing up away from her.

Ellie walks towards you, backing you against a wall, “I think you meant sexy, but that’s alright sweetheart I still understand you.” Ellie grabs you by your shoulders and spins you around, using her arm to pin you against the wall, your face feeling squished against the plaster. She grabs the bottom of your skirt and pulls it up, groaning in disappointment when she realizes you’re wearing a skort. “Fuckin prude,” she mutters before grabbing the waistband of your skort and yanking it down, exposing your white hanes to her.

“Hey! What the fuc-” 

Ellie cuts you off, “Sorry did I tell you to speak?”

“N-No but-”

Ellie cuts you off again by grabbing you by the back of your head and shoving your face even harder against the wall, causing you to whine in pain. “You speak when I tell you to speak, until then shut your goddamn mouth before I gag you.” Ellie slaps your ass and chuckles when you yelp. “Do you still want to stand here and deny that this borderline geriatric pair of panties are granny panties? Huh? I mean, this sure as shit ain’t a thong, but if you’re really so deep in denial I guess I could be generous and turn it into one for you, honey.”

Before you can even think about protesting Ellie grabs your waistband and pulls it up teasingly slow, your eyes go wide as you’re transported back to highschool by the feeling of the cotton fabric sliding against your skin and situating itself between your cheeks. As the fabric begins to sink into your folds you’re transported back to a memory of Ellie giving you a wedgie in the locker room during senior year.

“Shut up and take it, loser! It’s your fault for pissing me off today!” Ellie whisper-yelled as she pulled the front of your panties violently, tears welled up in your eyes as the baby pink fabric was forced into the folds of your cunt.

“Stop! Come on, you really don’t have to do thi-”

Ellie cuts you off with another harsh tug of your panties, your mouth falls open as a sharp pain shoots up your ass. You try to reach back and tug your waistband away from Ellie but she’s quick to pin your wrists against your back, using her body weight to help pin you against the wall. “Don’t you fucking dare! You’re so goddamn defiant, I miss the helpless loser you were in highschool, this was so much easier back then. You knew how to shut up and take it.”

Ellie shoves her leg between your thighs and lets go of your waistband, she uses her now free hand to remove her belt and restrain your wrists with it. “There. Now you have no choice but to take it,” she laughs. You try to squirm out of her grasp but with her thigh pressed against your cunt all it does is make your face heat up and make you hold back a moan of pleasure. Ellie continues to hold you against the wall as she grabs your waistband again, “Ready for me, wedgie girl?” Ellie smirks as she starts to pull your waistband again, pulling harder than before, almost lifting you off the ground with her first pull.

You choke on nothing as she uses your old nickname, feeling you with even more shame as your brain floods with countless memories of your public humiliation at her hands. Your eyes screw shut as you feel the threads snapping against your skin, the painful friction against your most sensitive parts sends pained moans from your lips. 

“P-Please…h-hurts so bad,” you whimper, tears forming in your eyes as you rest your forehead against the wall.

“It’s supposed to, dumbass. I bet you like it though, don’t you? It’s the most attention your little virgin cunt has ever gotten, huh?” Ellie snickers. 

“I-I’m not a virgin!” You reply.

“Bullshit. I doubt you’ve even had an orgasm…poor thing, bet your poor little pussy just leaks from the slightest attention…I could breathe on it and you’d cum. It’s a miracle you haven’t cum yet, I’m pratically fucking you with these,” Ellie pulls harder, getting you onto your toes to emphasize her point. Ellie giggles, “You know what, you’re not a virgin I’ve already fucked you with your panties.”

You mewl with embarrassment which sends Ellie into a fit of laughter, once she calms herself she lets go of your waistband. You sigh in relief as you think she’ll let you go but once you feel her grasp on your leg holes your eyes go wide. You’re not getting off that easy. 

“You know what, let me rip these and I’ll give you a pity orgasm, how does that sound, loser?”

“No, come on! Ellie don’t rip these!” You plead.

“Oh come on, nerd. I’ve already stretched them out, they’re unwearable, just let me have my fun,” Ellie begins to lift you by the leg holes of your panties. You cry out in pain, your legs kicking out of instinct as you feel the fabric of your panties pulled back and through your cunt, the fabric scraping against your cunt in such a way that causes you to begin to cry.

“Can’t believe you’re already crying, you went fucking soft on me, nerd. Guess I gotta do this everyday and build your tolerance back up,” she says in a patronizing tone. 

“No, no, no, please…Ellie…” Your breath is ragged as she continues to split your ass with your panties, showing no mercy as she bounces you, the sound of threads ripping fills the room.

“Oh come on, baby, you can take it. Don’t tap out now, you’re so close,” Ellie coos, snaking one of her hands around to grab the front of your panties and begins pulling from the front too. You scream in pain and she lets go and begins to scold you, “Shut the fuck up! Are you trying to get caught? You want everyone to see you getting fucked with your panties?” 

You sniffle, “N-No…”

“Then shut. the. fuck. up. and take it. Got it, slut?” She questions.

“Got it…”

Ellie resumes and you bite your lip to hold back your pained noises as she bounces you by the front and back of your panties, making you feel like you’re being split in half. You can’t remember the last time you were in this much pain and you hate how soaked it gets you, a wide wet patch is very visible in the gusset of your panties. It doesn’t take many more pulls for the panties to finally rip, you moan loudly in pain and pleasure as you feel the fabric rip against your cunt. Ellie is quick to grab you by your waist, old hand holding the ripped pair of panties as she helps you to the floor. You sit against the wall and catch your breath, looking up at Ellie completely wrecked. Your mascara is smudged beneath your eyes and you have red marks on your hips. 

Ellie squats down to your level, “You okay?” She asks softly, reaching towards you to trace the marks on your hips. Her gentleness confuses you, when she bullied you in high school she would’ve just let you fall to the floor and leave you to deal with the aftermath.

“I-I think so…” You mumble.

She reaches up and cups your cheek, “Can I finger you?” She looks down at your red puffy cunt, licking her lips as she imagines you mewling for her as she stuffs your cunt. 

“I…No one has ever…y’know…touched me like that before…” You explain shamefully.

“I wanna make you cum, loser. Wanna feel your cunt clench around my fingers.”

You look up at Ellie with glassy eyes, whining at the thought, “Why?”

Ellie looks down, her cheeks turning red, “Because I think you’re hot…and I’ve been wanting this for years…”

“You have?” You ask, brows furrowed as you scan her face for any hint of a lie.

“Yeah…I…I like how you sound when I torture your pretty pussy, wanna make it feel good this time, wanna reward you for how you took that wedgie.”

You think it over for a minute before you nod, “I want your fingers inside of me, please.”

“You want it on the bed, baby girl?” She asks, nodding her head towards the bed of whatever poor boys room you two have only just begun to desecrate. 

“Yeah. Can you untie me too please,” you ask softly, lifting your restrained hands behind your back.

“Oh shit, I forgot I even did that. Let me get that off you,” Ellie helps turn you around and removes the belt restraining your hands and slips it back onto her jeans. She takes your wrists in her hands to check for marks, “They should only be a little sore…I’d wear long sleeves till the marks go away unless you feel like coming up with a story about how they got like that.”

You nod and let her help you onto the bed, you wince in pain as you sit on the bed, the soreness in your ass already kicking in.

Ellie tilts her head and leans towards you, looking down at your lips, “Can I kiss you?”

You nod, wetting your lips with your tongue. She leans in and presses her lips to yours, kissing you softer than you could’ve ever imagined from her. There’s a masochistic part of you that had always had a crush on Ellie, you had dreams of her fingering you, eating you out, hell even taking you on dates. But you had never imagined she’d really kiss you, especially not like this. You kiss her back and are quick to deepen the kiss, Ellie smirks against your lips at your eagerness and pulls you into her lap, spreading your legs and cupping your cunt. She uses you gasping at the sudden contact to slip her tongue into your mouth and you moan into her mouth once she starts to massage your clit. Your body feels like it’s on fire and you beg the universe to not let you cum before she can even get her fingers inside of you. 

She pulls away from your lips, a trail of saliva still connecting them as she moves her mouth down to your neck. She presses a kiss below your ear and whispers, “Gonna take off your shirt baby, wanna suck those pretty tits.”

That alone is enough to make you grip her hair tightly and whine. You help her remove your shirt and she’s quick to remove your bra as well, beginning to trail kisses down your neck. “You’re so fucking pretty, got perfect tits…for a loser…” She snickers. 

This time it doesn’t feel malicious, it makes your clit twitch and your breath hitch. 

“You like when I’m mean to you, don’t you? Bet you’d go home after school everyday and play with that pretty pussy of yours and think about what I did to you…Bet it got you wet once I got everyone calling you wedgie girl…” Ellie smirks at you, admiring the embarrassed expression on your face.

“Shut up…” You giggle.

She smiles and starts to leave hickeys on your neck and collarbones, drawing whines and whimpers out of you with ease. She pulls back to admire her work, “I’d suggest you invest in a turtleneck, sweetheart,” she chuckles.

“Shit…what’s my roommate gonna say?” You mutter, brushing your hair out of your face as you try and think of an excuse to give Seline.

“Are you with her or something?” Ellie asks.

You shake your head no, “God no…she just knows I haven’t done anything like this before…never came back to our dorm with a hickey before either.”

“You’re so innocent it’s fucking adorable,” Ellie says, leaning forward and kissing you again. She pulls away and leans down to press kisses to your tits, nibbling slightly here and there, making you whine once she takes one of your nipples into her mouth, tweaking the other with her hand. “Fuck…Ellie…” you whine, tilting your head back as she worships your tits.

She trails a hand down to your cunt, slapping it lightly, making you yelp. She laughs softly and presses her ring and middle finger against your folds, swiping up some of your slick and bringing her fingers up to her mouth to taste you. She takes her fingers into her mouth and sucks your slick off, moaning at the taste, “You taste as good as you look, sweet girl.”

She leans forward to kiss you and slowly slips two fingers inside of you, you gasp against her lips and buck your hips forward. “Oh fuck…”

“I haven’t even started baby,” she laughs. She begins to pump her fingers in and out of your cunt, whispering praises to you as she brushes her thumb against your cunt. She bites her lip as you whine her name, reaching out to grip the bed sheets. “You’re so tight, bet you’ve been needing this huh…”

“Y-Yes mommy, needed it so bad,” you mumble, too engrossed in your own pleasure to truly realize the words leaving your lips. 

Ellie stops and tilts her head, looking at you with her jaw dropped, “Did you…did you just call me mommy?”

“Fuck…I-I’m so sorry, it just sli-” Ellie cuts you off by resuming her pace, speeding up her movements quickly to make you fall apart.

“Tell mommy how fucking good it feels,” Ellie commands. 

You’re quick to follow her orders, muttering pathetically about how good she’s making you feel. “Mommy…I fucking…I’m so close, need to…”

“Need to cum, don’t you pretty girl? Gonna make you cum, gonna make my pretty baby make a mess all over my lap.” Ellie curves her fingers inside you, hitting right where you need until it sends you over the edge. You let out a string of moans as you collapse forward onto Ellie, burying your face in her neck and you moan incoherently. Ellie works you through your orgasm, rubbing your back whispering praises as you come down. She sucks your juices off her fingers, continuing to rub your back and praise you as you catch your breath.

“Fuck…thank you…” You whisper, your head still buried in the crook of her neck.

Ellie smiles and pulls you close to her, “Anytime, loser.”

You roll your eyes and giggle, the word no longer feels hurtful but instead playful. Ellie pulls you off her lap and grabs your ripped panties off the floor, using them to clean you up. “These are coming home with me,” Ellie says, holding the ripped fabric up in front of your face.

You try to snatch them away from her but she’s quicker than you, stuffing them in her back pocket. “Nuh uh, these are mine now, loser. Need something to help me get off when I think about this again.”

She helps you redress and tries to help fix your hair and smudged makeup, it’s all futile thanks to the hickeys she decorated your neck and collarbones with. “You know it’s pretty dark out there, I doubt anyone will notice,” Ellie says, motioning to your hickeys.

You roll your eyes and give her a look that says ‘really?’ “Ellie, these are impossible to miss, my roommate is never gonna let me live it down.”

“I can’t help that I’m so good at humiliating you,” Ellie giggles, wrapping her arms around your waist, nuzzling her face into your neck.

“Shut up and take me back to my dorm,” you say playfully, nudging her with your head.

“Round two?” She asks hopefully.

“I’ll consider it…”

#wedgie kink #ellie williams #ellie williams x reader #ellie williams x you #ellie williams x female reader #ellie williams smut #ellie williams x reader smut #bully!ellie williams #ellie williams fanfic #ellie williams series

[f4nrir]

eddie brock/venom nsfw alphabet

hi! i'd love to see an nsfw alphabet done for eddie brock/venom, C, K, M, W, P, L, & T :D

Eddie Brock/Venom nsfw alphabet

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

Eddie's preferred way would be cumming all over your face and stomachs, depending on what you two are doing. When you suck him off, he'd rather not have you swallow his cum. Even though he splits a body with Venom, he's still a cleanly man and finds it perturbing. If he's pleasing you, he wouldn't mind if you make him swallow since he enjoys it. He feels as if he isn’t “clean” enough to have that done to him, due to the symbiote living inside him. Venom on the other hand is quite the opposite, he'd use you as his own cum dump and would want you to also fill him up. He has plenty to produce and finds satisfaction in seeing your hole leaking with his cum and when it's his turn, he'd want the same thing.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Bondage - Eddie and Venom have a huge thing for being tied up, unable to move within your control. Even though they're extremely strong, they somehow melt like putty when you are in control and can't seem to get out of the ropes. On the other hand, seeing you tied up makes them feel more power and takes advantage of that in every way, with consent of course.

Praise - They both love being showered with praise and attention, especially when they're pleasing you. Your pleasure matters the most to them and hearing encouraging words only makes them want to perform even better. Your moans are enough to drive them crazy but with a mix of praise, you're up for a long night.

Tentacles/Monster(?) - When venom takes over, he penetrates you in different ways. Whether it'd be his "dick" or tentacles, which he prefers. He feels as if it accurately assembles his character, as he is an otherworldly creature. With this method, he can please you in many different ways at the same time and overwhelm you with different sensations.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

The littlest sounds emitting from you is enough to get them going, even if you didn't mean it in a sexual way. A small grunt or moan from pain, you can expect them to start peppering your neck in kisses and rut against you.

Simply sitting down on your lap and feeling your bulge feels like ecstacy, expect an innocent cuddle session to turn into a night full of rough fucking on both ends.

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

They love marking you. When they’re pinned below you as you’re thrusting in them, they claw at your back and leave pleasurable, stinging marks. Eddie usually does this as Venom’s sharp claws would do too much damage. But to make sure that you know he’s there, the pressure would be profound.

Eddie also likes being marked up. He loves the sensation of your hot breath against his neck. He likes to know that he’s taken and always loves it when you leave love bites all over his neck. Venom enjoys it too, as his senses are heightened and he’s more sensitive to your touch.

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

Eddie’s thrusts are at a medium space, keeping it slow yet making sure he hits the right spot over and over again. When he’s riding you/fucking himself, he prefers it rough and fast. Depending on the mood though, sometimes he’d only want to make sweet, gentle love.

Venom loves it rough and fucking each other like animals in heat, he craves you all the time and can't seem to get enough of you. He isn't the type for sweet love making, lots of rough sex is what he provides best.

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

Because of Venom, Eddie prefers private spaces with lots of room to be able to do extensive activities. He's also possessive, he doesn't like showing off your body to anyone else. Quite the opposite of Venom, he wouldn't mind doing it anywhere and prefers it to be that way. He loves showing you off and have people with exotic interests watch you please one another. It's not quite common to find people like that though, so it happens once in awhile.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

They have plenty. The pair are always together, which comes with experimenting whenever they're bored. They always want you to join and everyone takes turns, however, they prefer pleasing you the most and could go for hours doing what you'd like to do.

#— zeppelin’s files 📁 #eddie brock x venom x reader #male reader #eddie brock x male reader #eddie brock x reader #venom x male reader #venom x reader #venom x eddie #marvel headcanons #venom headcanons

[angxlwritez]

Dues

➳♡゛-PAIRING: Landlord!Toji x Tenant!Reader

➳♡゛-SUMMARY: Short on rent, again. You find a way to pay off your debt owed.

➳♡゛-WARNINGS: Smut (MDNI), P in V, Handcuffs, Facial, Begging, Toji Calls Reader Princess, Oral (F & M) Receiving.

➳♡゛-A/N: My entry for @nymphoheretic xxxhub collab!

“One thousand fifty, one thousand one hundred, one thousand two hundred...” The woman mumbled to herself as she continued counting the money she’d just received from the end of her shift.

"You've got to be kidding me. I'm still short!" Y/N huffed as she shook her head in disbelief.

After getting fired from her old job she had no choice but to apply for the shitty diner down the street. It didn’t help that they paid the bare minimum and the customers barely tipped.

As she walked back to her apartment, Y/N couldn't help but feel defeated. How was she ever going to pay her rent? School was already wearing her down but she promised that she’d pay him for the last couple months and this month. But Toji was growing increasingly impatient and she knew she couldn't keep dodging him forever.

At the front door to her apartment, Y/N rummaged through her bag in search of her keys. Completely unaware to her  that the raven haired man was watching her from a distance, figuring out how he could demand for the unpaid rent.

He hated making such demands, especially since Y/N was a struggling college student. But he had a family to feed and bills to pay, and her debt was putting a considerable dent in his own finances.

As Y/N finally found her keys, she entered her apartment, completely unaware of the shadow that followed her inside. She tossed her bag on the couch and kicked off her shoes, letting out a sigh of relief that she was home.

Her relief was short-lived as she turned around to find Toji standing behind her with a stern look on his face.

"Hey Toji," Y/N said, trying to play it cool. "What brings you here?"

"You know why I'm here," Toji replied coldly. "You haven't paid your rent in two months, and I can't afford to keep letting you live here for free."

"I know, I've been trying to find the money," Y/N said, her eyes darting around the room, looking for a way out of the situation.

"Well, I've come to collect it," Toji said, stepping closer to her. "And if you don't have the money, I'm going to have to evict you as it’s long overdue."

Y/N’s heart pounded against her chest as he towered over her. She could feel his eyes darting around the room again, searching for something to seize as collateral if she couldn’t pay the rent off soon but with no luck she saw nothing.

"Look, I want to pay you, I really do," she said, trying to sound sincere. "But I just don't have the money right now..."

Toji scoffed. "Then how do you propose we settle this?"

Y/N bit her lip, trying to think of something, anything to offer him. "How about me?" she blurted out her words faster then her brain could comprehend.

Toji raised an eyebrow, surprised at Y/N's sudden proposal. "Excuse me?"

Y/N took a deep breath, bracing herself for what she was about to say. "I know it's not ideal and maybe it's crazy, but what if I paid off my debt in a different way?"

Y/N fidgeted nervously but held his gaze. "I could offer myself as payment. Just for one night. To make up for the rent I owe you."

Toji's eyes widened as he studied Y/N for a long moment. He had been eyeing the young woman for a while now, watching as she walked in and out of her apartment, imagining her beneath him. He had almost given up on his fantasy when she stopped paying her rent. But now, it seemed like fate had intervened.

Toji's eyes darted to the floor, considering Y/N's offer. He knew she was desperate, but there was no denying the lust he felt towards her deep within him. The thought of having her beneath him, submitting to his every whim, made him feel alive in a way he hadn't in years.

"You're offering yourself as payment?" Toji asked incredulously, his fingers tracing her jawline.

Y/N nodded, her cheeks heating up from embarrassment.

Toji's lips curved into a wicked smile as he leaned in, his breath sending shivers down Y/N's spine. "Well, why didn't you say so sooner?" he whispered, his lips hovering dangerously close to hers.

Y/N's heart raced as she felt Toji's hand slide down her neck and wrap around her waist, pulling her in closer. She could feel his hard body pressed against hers, and she couldn't deny the feeling that was beginning to course through her veins.

She would be lying if she said this was what she had originally intended when proposing to pay off her debt in a different way but she didn’t mind. She’d always find him to be an attractive man.

"So, is it a deal?" Y/N asked breathlessly, her eyes searching his for an answer.

Toji let out a deep chuckle, the tension evaporating instantly. "It's a deal," he murmured, pressing his lips against hers.

Y/N closed her eyes, the sensation of his lips on hers sending electrifying sparks throughout her body. She felt his hands wander down her back, exploring every inch of her body with an animalistic hunger. His kiss was passionate and fiery, and she felt her body melt into his.

Toji then guided Y/N to the bedroom, his hands gripping her hips as he pressed her back against the wall. Y/N could feel every muscle in his body flexing and his heart pounding against his chest.

As his hands moved to her shirt, quickly unbuttoning it and pushing it off of her body. She could feel the goosebumps rise on her skin as he trailed kisses down her neck and exposing her body to the cool rooms air.

Y/N felt her heart continue to race as Toji moved away from her to look in her drawer for a condom, instead his eyes wandered to the pair of handcuffs laying inside of it from a nearby drawer, the thought of his intended plan long gone. As he dangled them in front of her eyes, his expression became stern and serious.

"Now that we have this settled, I think you owe me an experience that you and I won't forget," he said, eyes glinting with a spark of excitement.

Y/N swallowed hard, unable to meet his gaze as she slowly nodded her head, her pulse racing with anticipation and a sudden need for something new and exciting.

She felt her heart race as he snapped the handcuffs around her wrists to the headboard, the cold metal sending a shiver up her spine.

Leaning in, his arms wrapping around her holding her tightly as he kissed her deeply. Y/N moaned as she felt Toji's tongue explore her lips and the sensation of his body pressed against hers. His hands moving to pull down her skirt, the sound of slipping fabric echoing through the room.

Y/N's heart beat faster as she felt Toji's hands exploring the expanse of her body, there was something about the way his hands moved across her skin that seemed to ignite a burning inside of her. She felt herself growing wetter as her hands began to tug against the handcuffs.

When she finally found the voice to speak, her voice was hoarse and breathless. "Toji, I want to touch you." she said, her voice pleading.

Toji pulled back, looking at her with a smirk. "Not yet," he replied, his fingers trailing down her body, stopping at the edge of the elastic of her panties.

"But-" Y/N began to protest.

"I said not yet," Toji interrupted her, his voice stern as he pulled away from her.

Her eyes fixed on Toji, as there was a fierce look in his eye, a commanding look that was both frightening and exciting.

Toji pulled the rest of her clothing off, his lips trailing kisses along her body, down her stomach, to her thighs and legs. He could smell her arousal and he wanted his taste of it.

Reaching down he began to part the outer lips of her pussy with his fingers, his eyes studying the delicate flesh as he opened her up for his eyes.

She could feel herself begin to shake roughly, the sensation of his fingers against her growing more and more intense, the throbbing inside of her only growing stronger.

Toji pressed his lips against her clit, kissing her softly, his tongue darting out to caress her, exploring her and tasting her.

Y/N's body shuddering as she let out a soft moan as his tongue explored her, his hands holding her hips tight against him, his grip strong and firm.

"You taste good," he murmured, his voice low and husky as he began to lick her more forcefully, his tongue darting in and out of her.

As Toji continued to pleasure her with his mouth. She could feel her body begin to shake and her legs grow weak as he continued.

She could feel her muscles tense as the orgasm began to build inside of her, the feeling of his tongue against her growing stronger.

"Toji, I'm going to–" she gasped, her climax growing closer, the feeling of pleasure more intense and strong than she had ever felt. Her hands tugged and pulled against the cuffs, her legs shaking as every touch Toji inflicted upon her sent electricity through her veins.

When he finally stood up, she could see the bulge in his pants, his erection straining against the fabric. Her eyes darted down to his waist, waiting for him to free himself.

Toji chuckled as he took a step back from her, her eyes burning into his. "Do you want to touch me?" he asked, his voice deep.

Y/N nodded, her lips parting to answer him, but he cut her off.

"Tell me. Say it," he demanded.

She couldn't hold back her arousal any longer, as she needed to feel him inside of her.  "I want to touch you," her voice a mere whisper.

Toji smirked as he began to fumble with his belt, pulling it open and pulling his pants down, revealing his erection. His lips curved up into a wicked smile as he felt Y/N's eyes on him.

"You want this?" he asked, grabbing a hold of his cock, tracing his fingers around the head it.

Y/N nodded, her eyes filled with lust and desire as she slowly nodded her head, her body yearning for his touch.

She could feel her heart racing as Toji's eyes moved from her to his hand, following his every movement as he began to stroke himself.

"You want this?" he repeated, his voice thick as he let out a moan.

"Yes," she replied, her voice sounding desperate, her eyes pleading.

"Beg me," he ordered, his voice strong and stern.

Y/N could feel her wetness pooling between her legs, dripping onto the sheets beneath her.  As she tried rubbing her legs together to get some type of release.

The sound of her own sighs and moans echoing throughout the room.

"I want you," her voice breathless.

"How do you want it?" he asked, his strokes growing heavier and more intense.

She could feel her heart beat faster and faster, her body growing more tense with every stroke he made. "I want you…I need you to fuck me," she replied, her voice a mere whisper.

Toji's eyes flashed with lust, his cock throbbing in his hand as he slowly walked closer to her.

His eyes wandered to the handcuffs still fastened to her wrists as he let out a low chuckle, his grin growing even wider as he stepped out of his pants and reached for them.

Y/N felt her heart beat loudly as she felt the hard metal against her wrists, loosen. A shiver running up her spine as he pulled her closer to him, her back pressed against his chest.

She could feel his breath hot against her neck as he leaned in, his hands roaming across her skin once more, his lips kissing her neck softly as he pulled away from her.

When the handcuffs finally fell to the ground, her body moved into his, her body arching as she felt the thick head of his cock pressing against the entrance of her pussy.

"I want you," he whispered into her ear, his voice a husky whisper.

She could feel every muscle in her body tense as she felt his cock sliding into her, pushing past the tightness of her entrance as he moved inside of her. The feeling of her walls gripping around him more intense than she could have imagined.

She let out a low moan as she felt him fill her completely, her hips arching against him as his cock slid deep inside of her.

"Fuck me," she pleaded, desperate for him to move inside of her.

He began to thrust into her, feeling her walls tighten around him, his cock growing harder with every movement.

His hands moved to her hips, holding her tight against him as he plunged deep inside of her, the head of his cock rubbing against her g-spot.

She could feel the muscles in her legs begin to shake, her body growing weak again as the pleasure deep inside of her continued to grow.

Toji could feel her begin to tremble, as he continued to drive his cock into her hard and fast.

She could feel the ripples of pleasure running through her body with every movement. As her body begin to tingle, muscles growing weaker as he moved inside of her.

"Toji," she moaned, her voice breathless, her body growing weaker and weaker as the orgasm continued to build up.

"Cum for me," he muttered.

He could feel her body begin to shake, her heart racing as he continued.

She felt her body tense, her muscles contracting as the orgasm finally reached her.

Her legs began to shake as her body began to tense up, the pleasure inside of her almost too much to handle.

Her moans growing louder as she felt herself begin to cum.

"On your knees Princess!" He commanded, his voice demanding.

Y/N complied, as she lowered herself to the ground.

Toji moved closer to her, his eyes growing darker as he watched her kneel before him. His hands moved to her face, cupping it firmly as he pushed himself against her lips.

He could feel the warmth of her mouth surrounding his cock as she started to move against him, using the suction from her mouth to drive him wild. Her tongue running circles around him as he felt himself beginning to cum within seconds.

He pulled away from her lips just in time for his cum to explode over her face and neck, coating them with a white slick substance that made Y/N gasp at the sensation.

As Toji pulled away from Y/N, he couldn't help but marvel at how beautiful she looked with his cum still clinging to her lips and cheeks.

Taking his finger he swiped some off her face, “Open your mouth princess.”

Doing as she was told she wrapped her mouth around his fingers sucking them gently.

He smiled at her, a satisfied grin appearing on his face as he looked down upon her.

"Cut!" Yelled the director from behind them, as Y/N could feel a wave of relief wash over her. She quickly got to her feet, still trying to catch her breath from the intense session they had  just moments before.

As they had given the two some towels and robes, the crew began to move around them, resetting the scene for their next take.

"Come on," he said softly, his voice low and gentle as his hand moved to the small of her back. "I'm not done with you yet. Let's practice the next scene in private."

With that being said he led her back to his dressing room.

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#reader insert #x reader #black reader #xxxhub collab #smut #jujutsu kaisen #toji fushiguro #toji x reader #black y/n #x black reader #jjk smut #jjk x reader #fushiguro toji #➳♡゛angxlwritez #x y/n #fem reader #black writers #jjk x black reader #jjk #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk x you #oneshot #jujutsu kaisen smut #jujustsu kaisen x reader #toji smut #toji fushiguro x reader #toji x you #toji fushiguro smut #toji x black reader #x you

[animeyanderelover]

I’m pleasantly surprised that people are actually requesting for this show. When I published my first Hc’s about the wolves, I really wasn’t sure how successful that would be.

Tw: Yandere themes, toxic relationship, possessive behavior, obsession, delusional thoughts, manipulation, gaslighting, s/o being monopolized, forced relationship, jealousy, isolation

Imprinting on Bella’s step-sister

You're the biological child of Phil Dywer and ever since he has married Renée, she has become your step-mother. You are happy for him because he genuinely seems to love her, even though his job requires him to travel often. You and your step-sister Bella see how much Renée misses her husband and Bella soon tells you that she has decided to move back to Forks to her biological dad in hopes and asks you if you would like to come with her. She explains to you that with the both of you living in Forks, Renée might be able to travel with Phil and could spend more time with him. You realize that she has the best in mind for her mother but you hesitate because whilst you know Charlie a bit, he isn't the father with whom you have grown up. On the other hand you also know that Renée can't tag along with her husband because of the both of you still being minors and you also know that your father and your new step-mom miss each other terribly whenever the both of them are separated from each other.

Bella proposes the idea one evening when the entire family is present because she kind of knows that it would be harder for you to explain yourself if only your new mother is in the house. You're still somewhat unsure about everything but Bella is already determined and you also wish for both of your parents to be able to spend more time together so hesitantly you confirm that you would like to tag along with Bella. Renée feels guilty when she realizes why the both of you are doing this, especially since Phil id your real father which makes this even harder for you. She tries to tell the both of you that everything will be fine and that she doesn't mind but Bella's mind is already set and you pull yourself together too. Your father is saddened by the news but decides to respect your wishes and instead see it as a good opportunity for you to brighten your prespective and meet new people.

Charlie is nice to you when both of you arrive in Forks, although you still feel a tad bit more awkward than Bella who seems comfortable because this is the father she has grown up with. You do your best to not show your hesitance and your nervousness though because Charlie is a good man. You come to realize soon that Bella herself seems to have troubles adjusting to Forks and the new school due to her quiet and introverted nature. Both of you just stick together in the beginning since both of you already know each other and are step-sisters anyways. Luckily both of you soon find your own group of friends and you start feeling more comfortable. At the same time though, Bella starts gravitating to the mysterious Edward who, as Jessica tells you, is together with his adopted siblings quite the mystery in the entire school. Although you have a bad feeling about him, you don't stop Bella.

You are introduced to Edward around the same time, a childhood friend of Bella as you soon find out, and you quickly notice that he is clearly in love with Bella. Your sister on the other hand only sees him as a good friend and you are just as aware of the fact that she already loves Edward. You can't help but think that Jacob appears to be the better choice though. He's sweet, protective and above all he looks normal. You subtly try to hint to Bella that he would be the safer choice but she ignores everything you say as she reacts quickly defensive as soon as you even mildly say anything against Edward. In favor of not causing a rift between the two of you, you give up and try to accept Edward. This is harder than expected though because Bella starts getting constantly in danger as soon as she involves herself with him and the Cullens. You can't help the sliver of bitter resentment when Bella breaks her leg and suddenly distances herself from you, more secretive than ever.

She always reassures you that everything will be fine throughout everything and you swallow all your strong dislike back. Only for Edward to disappear, leaving your step-sister broken and empty. If you could, you would slap him good across his stupid face as you try to support your sister and pick up the broken pieces as good as you can. You even contact Jacob snd inform him about her current status in hopes that by spending time with him, she might start feeling better. He latches onto this chance and you're all up for it, respect his wishes when he asks you if he can have some time alone with Bella. He's trying his luck now and whilst you aren't sure anymore if that will be of any use because of Bella's strong infatuation with Edward, you do what you can. Then he suddenly pulls back too and you are flabbergasted, can't believe that he would have done something like this to Bella.

You try to assist Bella to find him only for her to ask you to stay out of this. That's the first time you get really mad at her to the point of yelling because you're so frustrated. Frustrated because you know that she tries to keep something a secret from you despite you being her step-sister. Does she not trust you? She flinches, tries to make herself small as you get vent your emotions out but remains firm in her decision to keep you out of her business. It's too dangerous, you shouldn't get involved. Her own hypocrisy flies cleanly over her own head. You calm at least a bit down when she tells you that she's gotten back in contact with Jacob, explains briefly that he was having a hard time. You don't want to see the bastard's face anymore though as you wonder why Bella always has to be involved with such guys.

The final piece that breaks you is when Bella abruptly leaves and flies to Italy without giving you any explanation, although you see her with one of the Cullens. Not even Charlie can tell you clearly why she left and that is when you finally explode and storm to Jacob's house after getting the address from Charlie. Billy opens the door surprised after hearing your consistent pounding and ringing as you don't even let him have the first word, instantly asking him if Jacob is at home. He tries to stop you as you forcefully get in his house, vivid and ready to shake answers out of Jacob. Because you have a good feeling that he knows what's up with everything that has happened to Bella recently. He's most likely even directly involved. He's in the kitchen, a mug of hot beverage in his hands as he hears the loud noises and sees you storming through the door out of the corner of his eyes.

You demand answers from him, insist that you have the right to know what is going on with your sister. You notice that he looks very different. His long hair cut short and you even notice a tattoo on his arm and wonder if he has joined some sort of delinquent group. You can't help but feel disappointed because you genuinely trusted him with Bella only for him to abandon her too. Why is your sister surrounded by shitty men like that?? You glare at him, growing even more frustrated when you realize that he doesn't even turn around to look at him and start angrily yelling at him. You say some hurtful stuff to him within the passion of your anger, notice from the corner of your eyes how Billy looks increasingly worried and even scared as he tries to stop you but you're too caught up in your own frustration.

His hand clenches into a fist and you notice that he starts to tremble slightly but finally he turns around to look at you as you've successfully managed to make him unable to ignore him. You're prepared for him to get angry with you but the moment his eyes meet yours, you hear him gasping as he suddenly drops the mug in his hands, the object shattering as soon as it hits the ground as the hot liquid spills on the ground. You flinch in surprise, stare down at the broken cup only to look back at him confused only to find his gaze glued to you. He looks as if he is in a daze, a dreamy and reverent shine in his eyes as he stares at you. All traces of bitterness and anger vanish from his face as he steps forward to you. You stand still in your place, majorly confused with his sudden shift of behavior. Billy's face on the other hand has lit up with realization as he looks up at you with shock and surprise.

You have no idea what is going on as Jacob suddenly stands right in front of you, one of his hands suddenly grabbing your own hand. He’s really warm as you notice but that’s besides the point. He asks you softly if you’d like to stay for a bit and it weirds you out. What is going on? It’s like he has just forgotten about everything you just yelled at him. You look confused at his father but he still seems to be quite in shock from whatever realization he just had. Jacob seems to want to bring you into his room until you blur out that he still spilled his mug all over the floor and that you should probably clean it up. You’re just searching for an excuse to get away from him as his sudden shift in behavior scares you. He quickly tells you that he’ll do it though and that you can just sit down in the kitchen in the meantime, his eyes showing his eagerness to have you within his reach.

The following days feel surreal to you. It’s like he’s forgotten all about Bella and instead has latched onto you all of a sudden. You don’t get any answers out of him either although he promises you that he’ll tell you, even claiming to you that Bella will probably never tell you. His promises manage to keep you close and he knows that which is why Jacob uses it as manipulation. His previous love for Bella is all but forgotten as you are his real imprint and his body is filled with blissful delight. He dedicates himself to stick close to you, visits you countless times whilst using the trust Charlie has with him to lure you out of your room. He tells Charlie that he’s worried about you because of Bella’s sudden absence and would like to try to cheer you up. To your dismay Charlie decides to believe him because he is also concerned about you and you can only reject Jacob that often until Charlie starts getting suspicious.

When Bella returns with Edward, you notice Jacob’s good mood dropping rapidly. Shouldn’t he be happy that Bella is back? You want to greet Bella happily for finally returning although you’re still mad with Edward. It never gets that far though as you’re suddenly pulled back by Jacob who wraps his arms tightly and protectively around you. You glance up confused and feel your breath hitching in your throat when you see the hateful and resentful glare he gives both of them. Edward’s eyes widen a tad bit in surprise, you don’t know why but he also seems to realize something as his face reminds you of Billy when he seemed to notice something you didn’t. At least Bella is in the same boat as you as she looks at Jacob confused. When she tries to approach you, he sneers at her to stay back, his voice dripping with anger and spite that you never thought would come from him. What is wrong with him? Bella is his friend! Edward steps protectively in front of Bella as both men glare at each other.

You don’t understand what is going on as Jacob suddenly blames Bella for keeping you away from him, accusing her that she just wants to see him suffer but that this won’t happen anymore. He sounds like a paranoid maniac as he throws those accusations at her and Bella and you exchange confused and frightened looks as Jacob keeps you as close to him as possible before dragging you away from both of them. As soon as the both of you are alone and you try to collect your racing mind, he suddenly demands of you to stay away from both of them. They’re trouble for you, with him you’re much safer. You stare at him before shakily asking you what is going on. Your meek tone softens his harsh features as he embraces you and gives you a soft kiss on your forehead, promising you that everything will be fine now. You have him.

From that day on Jacob becomes unbearable. He’s always spending his time with you and his attitude is terrible. He’s hostile and aggressive around everyone around you, his mood quickly spoiled as soon as you ignore him for one freaking minute in favor of chatting with one of your friends. He’s rude and salty with them, completely ignores your feelings as he scares them away and manages to make them avoid you. Worst of all is that as soon as you lash out at him, he starts crying and begging you to not leave him and abandon him like Bella did. He loves you! He can’t live without you! Everything leaves you with a major headache, you don’t understand anything coming from his mouth. In what way did Bella abandon him? You attempt to ask Bella about it but she tells you that Jacob will probably tell you soon enough, her eyes avoiding yours as if she’s guilty of something. You don’t get much time to spend with Bella as Edward keeps her away from you and has her avoiding you just as much as Jacob makes sure that you stay away from those two. They’re bad influences after all.

Eventually he brings you along to one of the private meetings of his tribe. You initially want to reject and flee from him by locking yourself up in your room but when he tells you that tonight he’ll tell you everything, you have no choice. You notice that a lot of his other friends have the same tattoo as them as they welcome you. Jacob keeps you protectively close to him the entire time. It’s on that night that you find out everything you thought only existed in fairy tails. You have troubles looking Bella into her eyes after that, almost feel betrayed by her as you find out about her plans to turn into a vampire and for never telling you anything. The news of that Jacob imprinted on you and that it is physically painful for a shapeshifter to stay away from their imprint shackles you to him, forces a responsibility on you that ties you to him. Jacob seems satisfied though. He has you all for himself after all. That’s everything he ever wanted.

#yandere twilight #yandere jacob #yandere jacob black

[runawaymun]

if you don't mind me asking, what's wrong with kataang? i haven't watched avatar but i know the plot through osmosis, and wanted to hear your thoughts on that

Ah okay! Let me try to explain...

Caveat 1: this will probably be a bit rambly Caveat 2: it has been a long time since I watched either At:LA or TLoK, but I have watched it both as a kid (teenager, really) and as an adult multiple times.

My problems with kataang is kind of split into two categories: problems with the ship based off of who they are as characters from a writing/themes/narrative arc/messaging standpoint, and problems presented by how the creators of At:LA and TLoK - Michael Dante DiMartino and Bryan Konieztko (not Aaron Ehasz you're doing amazing sweetie) treat the characters and seem to think about the characters, based off of choices that they made in the telling of the story, especially how the characters are treated in their endgame scenario in TLoK (which, notably, Aaron Ehasz didn't write for due to creative differences).

TLDR: IMO Kataang ruins the character arcs, they're bad for each other, and the writers did a disservice to Katara in favorite of their pet meow meow -- which hurt both character arcs and legacies, ultimately.

My chief issue is that Katara and Aang are bad for each other, romantically. They bring out the worst in each other. They're bad at holding healthy boundaries, bad at communicating, and the ship itself is very unbalanced. And I wouldn't have a problem with this if it was recognized by the narrative or the shippers, but the narrative treats them as a great love story when really it's anything but. I won't get into age differences -- because by the time they marry a two-year age difference is very negligible and I don't really think it's a good argument against the ship (even if I do think that shipping a 12 year old boy with a 14 year old girl is insane like what 14 year old girl WANTS to date a 12 year old boy. 12 year old boys are gross haha <3) -- but let's talk about it from a thematic and character growth standpoint.

Aang's arc is fundamentally about not running away from his problems, and learning to step into his role as the Avatar. He struggles with responsibility, struggles with emotional regulation, and struggles in the tension between being very much a 12-13yo kid, and being the Avatar, who has to save the world. His arc is beautiful. It's done SO WELL. And he manages to stay true to himself and I love that for him.

Katara's arc IMO is fundamentally about learning to fight for herself, and not just for others. Katara is very maternal. She has had to grow up extremely quickly in the face of losing both parents at a young age, and understanding that she has to live in constant fear of being murdered for her waterbending abilities. She constantly has to stand up for herself, and has a bad habit of suppressing difficult feelings in lieu of helping others work through theirs. This culminates in Katara taking several seasons (iirc) to actually properly talk to someone about her grief and the burden she is carrying, and to learn to set healthy boundaries -- to help her friends and to grow into a strong warrior and work on herself.

The problem here is that the narrative, over and over, forces Katara to emotionally regulate Aang, and this is never really addressed. They have really poor boundaries and she's always mothering him -- Aang is not a partner for her. He doesn't often reciprocate the same level of support that she gives to him -- mostly because he is twelve. Katara, narratively, acts like a crutch for Aang to lean on. Aang actively holds Katara back from setting healthy boundaries and growing into her own person.

They have an emotionally imbalanced relationship, and again -- Michael and Bryan really don't ever try to rectify this, and I think also they're just really bad at writing romance idk. Because over and over Aang makes passes at Katara, and Katara never really expresses interest. That could be down to Katara being bad at expressing her emotions, but it really doesn't feel like it. The last straw for me -- from a narrative standpoint, is the episode where Aang confesses his feelings to Katara, Katara literally says "I don't know how to feel. I'm confused." And Aang, without asking, decides that this is the perfect moment to kiss her.

Which, fine. They're kids. Kids make mistakes. They don't do things perfectly. I'm fine with characters making mistakes. But for a kids' show that's pretty intent on helping us all learn good life lessons -- this is never addressed. Katara is never given the chance to say "Hey, I didn't appreciate that." Aang never is made to apologize for crossing a boundary. It's treated as just a big stepping stone toward their incredibly forced romantic arc. And I hate hate hate when stories tell boys that the appropriate response to a girl asking for space to sort out her feelings/being unsure is to oh, just kiss her, to help her figure it out! instead of, I don't know, let her make up her own mind and give her space. "I don't know" is not fucking consent, and they shouldn't treat it like it is. Especially not in a kids' show.

Which-- yeah, that kind of leads well into my second problem with Kataang - which is how the creators of the show treat it. To them, Kataang is endgame, it is in the "DNA of the show" as one put it. Which is very weird to me because it is so, so poorly done, and the writers really seem to care so little for Katara. Why do I think this? Because of how they choose to treat Katara in TLoK.

Katara, in her 80s in TLoK, is relegated to a healer and teacher. She's insignificant to the story when characters like Zuko and Toph get much cooler entrances and scenes. She's stuck being a passive bystander to a war (Katara would never.) She's stuck being a healer (Which, sure, she is. But so much of At:LA she chafed at being put in that box! She's also a fighter, goddamnit!) -- and some people have tried to say "well what do you want an 80 year woman to do?" and I don't! fucking! buy it! Characters in At:LA were badass fighters well into their 80s, like Hama (the fearsome bloodbender), Pakku (the Waterbender), Iroh (y'know...), and most notably, Bumi, who is 112 fucking years old. Don't give me "80 year old Katara sits on her ass at home while the men go out and do things and Zuko, at the same age, is literally riding around the world on fucking dragonback." I won't have it. It's Katara slander, I tell you! Let that old woman be a badass!!!

And the writers even go so far as to erase her from her kids' lives! They never talk about her!!! It is always about Aang! Always Aang! And you just get the impression that Katara dropped absolutely everything to be "The Avatar's wife" and SHE DESERVED BETTER RAUDGAHSGH

She doesn't! even! get! an honorary statue! On the very island on which she should! be a war hero! Aang does! Toph does! Zuko does! EVEN SOKKA DOES. The ENTIRE Gaang gets a statue, except Katara. That is a deliberate art choice! WHY did they leave her out?

They absolutely destroyed her ENTIRE At:LA arc in TLoK, and I am honestly not even surprised because the writers have said outright that Aang is a self insert character, and that Kataang is "that childhood romance that we both wanted as kids". Katara, in their brains -- and idk maybe this is unjust-- but she seems to be just the amalgamation of those 14 year old girls that wouldn't give them the time of day when they were snotty twelve year olds, except they're writing the story so of course Aang gets the girl.

Anyway, this doesn't even go into how there are infinitely better choices for Katara, and how Aang's arc is worsened by having a romantic subplot, and etc. etc. I could go on forever about how much I dislike Kataang from a narrative standpoint.

Literally my first thought when I heard they left the Netflix show "due to creative differences" was: "Oh my god, is it because there's no kataang???" and now that there's confirmed to be no kataang and that they may be going a zutara route instead, I'm convinced that's why.

Because it's "in the DNA of the show, you see" they have broken with cocreators before over their pet self insert ship and the narrative treatment of Katara (Aaron Ehasz), and I don't see any reason why they'd change.

alkdasdlkgh anyway. God. Thanks for the ask! Sorry about the really long anti kataang rant aslkdgh. This got kind of aggressive but I do feel very strongly about the treatment of Katara. My girl deserved so much better.

#anti ka/taang #god help me if this shows up in their ship tag because the shippers are rabid #there are already some notable differences in the netflix show to how they are handling katara and aang that I really appreciate #and i'm only like two episodes in #anyway if you see this kataang shippers this post is not for you

[the-hilda-librarians-wife]

Going buckwild at the way Hilda The Series portrays adulthood and loneliness. Kaisa has no one to go to to ask for help getting the due book back, even though all it would take was someone she could minimally ask to knock on an elderly lady’s door and ask for a favour; she’s in the library after hours, is shown to have no allies aside from the woman who raised her and who she lost contact with. Johanna is only ever seen working or caring for Hilda, and her lack of a life aside from those two activities is pointed out by her own daughter when she thinks that this is going so far as to affect their relationship. The bell keeper lives alone in a small cabin on the edge of town, barely within city limits and away from everyone, a house barely even inhabitable and clearly only a place to sleep and eat. He works a solitary job and he’s the only one in the town still working it, meaning he’s probably overworked and forced to pull inhumanly long shifts. Victoria hyperfocused so hard on her projects that whatever friends she had before - and she must have had some from college time at least - lost contact with her, and she never made any other connections in Trolberg, anything that would tie her to the city and it’s inhabitants and make it so it wasn’t worth it to live by herself at the top of a hill. Even when that was over, she still chose to isolate herself somewhere abandoned and keep what was essentially another machine she’d built as her source of company, something she could understand and control instead of an unpredictable human being. Gerda works a job she likes but is shown to be disregarded by the person she works the most around, her abilities and intellect thrown aside for the good of someone she has to bear because of a hierarchy she was forced to accept in order to keep working. She’s appreciated by the town, but other than the main characters, we don’t see anyone paying her any mind when they don’t need something from her.

Meanwhile no kid has ever been alone in Trolberg. The mean kids are a group, the good kids are a group, even the gloomy teenage girls are a group. One of nightmare inducing entities, but a group nonetheless. All children in that world seem to operate on a ‘no man left behind’ code, looking out for each other even if they aren’t exactly fans of one another, helping even grown ups without asking why and working together. And this logic seems to extend to the adults who work around children too; especially the Raven Leader, who we see that through the children works as a vital part of the community and a way through which it comes together.

This isn’t very articulate but do you see the point? Do you see how clever that is? That a show about growing up has these themes? You can be magical, kind, strong, intelligent, competent, but none of that will make you truly happy if you don’t keep the most important thing from childhood? If you don’t keep your friendships, your bonds, something to tie you down to your reality and your community? The adults in the show all made their choices, and it’s okay to want to be alone, we all need it and some more than others (this is coming from someone who needs it a lot), but isolating yourself completely is the one thing that will make growing pains truly painful. I’m just so emotional over it. It’s so subtle and so clever considering the whole Mountain King plot that Hilda is willing to change species because she feels detached from her main relationships and surroundings. I love this show so much.

#Hilda meta #Kaisa isolated herself because of insecurity. Johanna did it because of duty (keeping herself and a daughter afloat seemingly by her own) #the bell keeper did it (apparently) because of a lack of interest #AND being overworked. that’s so important to mention #actually scratch that. I bet being overworked is the MAIN reason. imagine keeping patrol day and night I wouldn’t talk to anyone either #Victoria did it because of passion #Gerda did it unwillingly as a result of the system she was working for #I could mention so many other people too #Tildy doing it because of hopelessness after the two people she loved failed to reach out to her #Abigail because she convinced herself she couldn’t go back home #the midnight giant because he made one sole person his whole world and his species had to leave #the trolls because of the consequences of colonialism sparking internal conflict #it’s lonely. lonely all around. #the only group of adults that seem to be doing fine are the elves #which are. you guessed it. a tightly knit community #and paperwork or no paperwork they all work for the well-being of their society as a whole #growing up doesn’t have to be lonely. growing up doesn’t have to be lonely. #but God it can be. and its something you have to fight against because it’s so easy to get caught in the tide #the more I grow the more things I find in Hilda to relate to #the show seems to age with us this is fantastic #Hilda the series #hilda netflix #johanna hilda #kaisa hilda #Victoria Van gale #the bell keeper hilda

[minecraftbookshelf]

Finally have the time and the spoons to come back around and talk a bit more about THIS and also like, staple crops and food-stuffs in general. General warning for another long post that is going to be half infodump and half worldbuilding and they will be all mixed up together.

By (kind of) opening the borders (outside travel in is still pretty limited but that is as much because Rivendell is honestly pretty hard to get to if you can't fly or scale mountains easily as anything else) and expanding international trade Xornoth changed the lives of every single inhabitant of Rivendell wildly for the better. (This would also apply in canon, only there it was Scott, and his closest ally was Katherine or Gem, not Pearl, but the overal point stands.)

Especially by allying so closely with Gilded Helianthia, Xornoth completely changed the way that Rivendell lives, especially during the winter. Prior to the opening of those trade routes, Rivendell relied entirely on what they themselves could produce during their short summer months to last out the winter. Both for themselves and their livestock. (And sometimes it comes down to having to decide whether to feed yourself or your livestock, with the knowledge that if you have to eat all your sheep and chickens to survive the winter you will have nothing to start over with in the spring and the next winter will be even harder but it isn't really even a choice.)

Because Rivendell did grow some wheat, a very sturdy strain bred for the mountains, but the season for it is short and so it's not as much as you would need to sustain an entire people and their livestock through a long southern winter. But you know what does grow in the mountains? Potatoes and carrots!

That's right folks, you heard it here first, lamb stew is a Rivendell staple food.

They would supplement their staple crops by hunting and fishing, but it wasn't always enough. But now...now they have regular shipments of beef and pork and all kinds of grains coming over the nether road and all they have to do is send a steady supply of wool right back. (And that's not even taking into account the humanitarian efforts that get sent between empires in times of crisis.)

After Scott's marriage to Jimmy they also get regular shipments of fish, though its less urgent by that point as, despite the steadily increased harshness of the winters (though that, oddly, seemed to dissipate somewhat when the prince left for the swamp. huh, weird.) they have much more food security from their decades of international trade at that point.

The Swamp itself only fishes on a trade scale, their livestock and crops are mostly household level. They do not eat cod for religious reasons. They do eat other seafood and swamplife as well, mollusks and crawdads and such.

Mezalea is the primary fishing empire, and the source of most internationally traded fish, though the Ocean gets a cut of that due to their treaties. They also grow some of their own staples, and trade for others (fish for wheat)

Pixandria does grow some of their own crops in the oasis but also, like Rivendell, relies both on hunting and trade with Helianthia to sustain the population. They also fish and forage from the sea as well. (It is also worth noting here that Pix does have the ability to summon storms so…that’s relevant)

The Ocean Empire sustains itself with kelp and fish farming. Fish are their livestock. They do also maintain some dry land livestock on a few small islands, but those are mostly reserved for special occasions. They also maintain a steady source of golden carrots. (It is suspected via black market)

The Overgrown is mostly self-sustaining. They trade for delicacies mostly.

The Grimlands, much like Rivendell, have potatoes as a staple crop. They have a surplus of potatoes at all times. Fwhip is like the rural neighbor who made the mistake of planting multiple zucchini plants and will vaguely threaten you into taking some at church. (They are good potatoes though. Even if some of them are a bit...odd and clearly contaminated by redstone runoff. Fwhip: "I eat them all the time, it's fine." Everyone else: *doubt*) They also have an annual salmon run.

Mythland has a free-roaming sheep population that they don't eat for religious reasons. Their staple crop is wheat and their wheat-fields are almost as impressive as Helianthias. They also trade with Rivendell for this purpose.

The Crystal Cliffs have magically insulated greenhouses and fields, allowing them to grow most anything they want even as high in the mountains as they are. They are limited only by space. They have built some of these in Rivendell as part of the treaties and alliance between them.

The Undergrove is currently populated by wolves (who feed themselves) and one (1) gnome. Shrub is very determinedly setting up the area to support whatever survivors they are able to find of their people. A good portion of what she currently is living off of are the mushrooms that she is cultivating and the beginnings of carrot and potato gardens.

The Lost Empire also primarily grows potatoes and carrots, though they also are the source of chocolate, and thus have a very steady trade with most other empires for that very purpose. They also fish from their rivers and lakes.

Gilded Helianthia is the only empire that grows crops in enough surplus for regular, extended trade. Due to their ideal geographical location, they are able to grow most crops and also have steady herds of cows, pigs, and sheep. They also export almost as much honey as Pixandria. They feed both themselves and a good chunk of the other empires as well. (The land is magical)

#rain rambles #empires s1 #empires smp #solidaritygaming #ldshadowlady #pixlriffs #smallishbeans #geminitay #shubble #shrub berry the gnome #pearlescentmoon #smajor1995 #marriage of state au #mythicaljsausage #katherineelizabeth #joeygraceffa #fwhip #mos: worldbuilding #mos: ensemble

[rongzhi]

How would you describe the attitude towards trans people in China? ((I ask this as a trans person who would like to work there as an expat))

I don’t live in China so I couldn’t tell you with any certainty what to expect in real life anyway. But, you asked, so I want to at least take a stab at it, even if I just end up rambling about other things.

I expect you know it’s already hard enough to be trans in the west, even in the supposed liberal utopia of major cities. Now think about moving to another country and having to start out with no real support network. Now on top of that, while recognition and acceptance of queer identities, particularly gays and lesbians, in China has taken strides forward in recent years, it’s still not on the same level with the same sort of sensitive treatment as what you could say many have come to expect in the West (depending on where you live). The official government stance on LGBT issues is a tepid “uhhhhhhmmmm 🙈🙉🙊” (“Laws protect all individuals from discrimination on the basis of gender, sexual orientation, etc, but until something happens don’t look at us for nothing 🤐. Please clap.”), so most LGBT education/awareness largely comes through local grassroots efforts (slow and frequently hampered) and online/global media exposure (tho this also requires a level of voluntary engagement).

So, I’m not trying to spook you, but I wanted to make that clear first, that merely moving to another country as a trans person is no enviable task. If you do immigrate to China or live there for a period of time, you will of course at least have some level of privilege as an English speaking (white?) foreigner, so that might help, especially if you plan on hanging out with other expats anyway. Living in a major city would also help, which is really just to say, city folk anywhere are always going to be more open-minded and so I guess this finally brings us close to more of an answer to your question:

Based on my limited observations, I feel like the attitude toward the every day trans person trends negative compared to the west, perhaps largely due to lack of understanding (why would “choose” to be trans, how could you do such a thing, etc). It is not illegal or anything, and HRT/gender reassignment surgery is available in China, medically speaking, but again, I sense that the knowledge/understanding disparity when it comes to transgender identity is pretty high and therefore acceptance is inversely proportional to that. Discussion of the topic that I have seen has never really been that nuanced. Young people are more likely to accept and support LGBT+ individuals in general, but that’s “in general (like, I supsect that it might be more for LGB support versus trans support, as typically LGB issues receive greater attention than trans issues).

On the more neutral/positive end, there will be people who say “as long as they’re not hurting anyone”/ “a person has to live for themself/respect each person’s right to make their own choices in life” and that sort of thing, but I’ve never seen anything pro trans or pro gender revelations per se (this is true by and large in the West as well I think, so no big diff there), and anecdotally, I’ve seen a lot of those comments toward trans people of like “oh but you used to be so pretty/handsome, why would blah blah blah”, and more emphasis seems to be placed on passing, like I guess the more successfully you transition to the opposite gender (ftm or mtf) the more respect you deserve (as if transition should be the goal) (like if you botch it, visually speaking, you might as well have not even bothered) (but I guess this is also true in mainstream thought in the west), and even if you pass you might still get hit with the “can you believe they’re actually a _?”/ "wow I have to be more careful" treatment.

I guess it’s worth noting Jin Xing, a popular trans celebrity/TV presenter in China, is also highly respected, even amongst older generations (which is cool). To many, she “already counts as a real woman” (to quote a comment I saw once) because she’s seen as dedicated to being herself (a woman), and is a wonderful mother to 3 adopted children. People respect her because she worked hard and she has an attractive personality, but at the same time, she’s also high profile enough that the disrespect can get drowned out by the admirers, so she's not a typical case of the trans experience in China obviously.

TLDR

Soooo. I don't live in China so my perspective is limited (I can't emphasise that enough) and only my own opinion based on discourse/exchanges, commentary, depictions, etc, I've witnessed on the Chinese web (douyin, bilibili, zhihu, and douban forums for the most part).

I don’t know how rude anyone would be to your face. Being a foreigner/expat (I said “(white?)” earlier because I feel like “expat” usually refers to white people) might afford you some extra privilege or at least a wider berth from dealing with assholes. As of right now, my impression of the general attitude toward trans people is: improving but still behind and still with the focus on successful transition. Lots of awareness is still needed but efforts to increase it are slow and hampered.

---

Aaaaah this turned out way longer than I'd hoped 😬 and I always feel like I'm typing up paragraph upon paragraph of unintelligible nonsense but I hope this give you some food for thought, since you asked for my take. I expect you're already quite sober to the realities of We Live In a Society™ as a trans person, so apologies if I sound too pompous or lecture-y at any point.

#text #answered ask #long post

[pupmkincake2000]

I once had this topic in my posts, and I want to talk about it again. Perhaps I will say the same thing, but in this context it is important to bring to the main idea.

So, the found-family trope. It has been perverted into "here's a set of characters, I've squished them into the heteronormative roles of father/mother/child". - found family CAN be that, in some cases, but that is not what the trope was initially founded on. The found family trope was built on NON-CONVENTIONAL FAMILIES/RELATIONSHIPS. It is about finding a family OUTSIDE of the one you were born into, a family that can be whoever you want, and look however you want it to. That's the very reason it's so popular in LGBT+ spaces. It is not about pushing people into strict parental/child roles. It is about finding family in other people, regardless of what they are to you. Romantic partners absolutely count as found family, so no, we are not pushing aside a lovely found-family trope for the "sake of a ship" (a silly sentence to begin with, imo, but I digress) Hank and Connor ARE found family, because you can find your family; your comfort, your helper, your partner in life, in your husband, wife, or partner. The opportunity for a queer love story does NOT cheapen anything, especially in todays world, where it's desperately needed right now.

So, when people say they are not infantilizing Connor by making Hank treat him like a son because adults are allowed to have parents and that Connor is smart and all but he’s still unexperienced when it comes to human emotions and needs someone to guide him and that Connor needs a guide, an anchor in his life I always ask myself why.

Why it has to be Connor of all androids? Why do people think Connor needs an anchor, a guide and why do they think he’s unexperienced? Considering, he’s a clever machine whose brain, or whatever he has in his head, works much faster than human being’s. Does that mean all the androids need a guide and an anchor? Isn't that infantilization? Weren't they actually shown as independent individuals? Doesn't this destroy him as an independent person who's already decided who he wanted to be and is aware of his own actions? In addition, people forget that he is not a human and he may not need the very concept of a father figure or parents/child relationships at all.

I have often seen how people who insist Connor needs a father, need a father figure themselves, in fact, they simply project their desires onto Connor and Hank due to a lack of fatherly love or attention, and some of them have directly admitted this to me. Tho, they choice of Hank as a father figure seems really ridiculous, considering how his relationships with Connor started. But then again, Connor is not a human, and such concepts may be alien to him. We do not talk about Markus here, because he lived for 10 years with a man who considered him a son from the very beginning. Therefore, Markus is the exception rather than the rule. We leave out Alice because she was essentially programmed to be a child and needs to be taken care of, this is basically her function. And there were no other examples of family relationships among androids, there were only couples.

The most interesting part is also that people who are usually against HankCon, seem like the ones who are applying their personal feelings and issues to the characters. Can your partner not be your family? Is your partner not your friend, your confidant, and the person that helps you heal and uplifts you? Those things aren’t locked to just platonic or familial relationships.

Although I'm still sure that good old stereotypes are to blame, because if Hank was younger or at least looked younger, no one would think of him as a father figure. If people are only doing this because of his age and looks (and I suspect that's the case... in most cases), it's largely the fault of the fandom itself that forces Hank into this stereotypical role. Because a lot of people who played the game, but have never been part of the fandom, have no problems seeing Hank and Connor as a potential couple or just who they are accrotding the plot - friends), it just shows how incapable they are of analyzing characters. Because according to this perspective, any human being, if they are not a child or a teenager, will be more experienced in life than any android. Shouldn't androids view all humans who are over 20 as their potential parents or parental figures then? But for some reason, if a human being looks young, no one assigns them such a role, although from such a point of view this is exactly how it should be. So either people accept that Connor is an adult, capable of making adult decisions (while remembering that he is not human), or they accept that any android is infantile by the very fact of their existence and needs a parental figure, even if humans who the androids interact with, look young.

#detroitbecomehuman #dbh rk800 #dbh hank #dbh connor #dbh #hank anderson #detroit: become human #hankcon #detroit become human #connor x hank #detroit rk800 #connor rk800 #rk800 #pumkin says

[olreid]

Hi! First of all i'm sorry if this is a weird or heavy question but i feel like i need to ask somebody, and you were the first person i thought of, so, yeah. How do i consume media critically? It's a phrase i hear around a lot, especially with some of my main interests, but i'm not 100% sure what it even entails. I know i have to be aware of the metatextual reasons for things and its flaws and such but... what then? am i supposed to do something about it or...?

this is from carl freedman on kant: "any mode of thought that declines to interrogate its own presuppositions and to engage its own role in the construction of the objects of its own knowledge may be appropriately stigmatized with the adjective precritical [...] precritical thought is the "intellectual equivalent" of the work of any status quo."

so essentially there is a certain amount of precritical thought that is necessary to maintain and reproduce the structures which make up dominant society. certainly there are people who are actively imperialist, capitalist, white supremacist, etc. but their numbers are bolstered by the people who don't question why things are the way they are -- whether it's why some people are forced to sleep on the streets or why we budget so much money toward police -- who ensure that things stay the same by accepting the things around them as normal, natural, and inevitable.

conversely, adopting a critical posture is not something that applies solely to media -- it is a way of moving through the world that involves being curious about why things are the way they are and questioning things that might otherwise be taken for granted. when we validate the claims that projects, policies, and objects implicitly make to being normal, natural, and right, we give them a lot of power. imagine a world in which cities had to start from scratch and justify every dollar they allocate toward police instead of just saying 'this is the way it is and the way it's always been.' when we start to poke at the historical, social, and political forces that have produced the world we live in, things start to seem a lot less inevitable and a lot more mutable. we can more easily imagine different ways to live and different ways to structure the world we live in. freedman again: "critical theory constantly shows that things are not what they seem to be and that things need not eternally be what they are."

we can apply this questioning and curious attitude, this desire to understand how things were made and why, to all parts of life, including the media we consume. the cop show wants us to take its centrality in the media landscape for granted; the true crime podcast wants us to squeal about the grisly details of murders without stopping to wonder why that particular form of storytelling is so popular in this specific moment in history and culture. the point is not necessarily to get definitive answers to those questions, but to explore, theorize, investigate, and take an interest in the things we consume. it's a lot like doing due diligence about where your food comes from -- aren't you interested in who is making the things you surround yourself with and what, if anything, they're trying to sell you or convince you of?

as to concrete strategies for developing your critical thinking and reading skills, i'm not sure i have any great advice that's not already been given. it depends on the person -- what they are naturally curious about and can use as an entrypoint, what methods of research work best for them, what pieces of media they love enough to do background reading and research about. you don't always have to go out of your way -- you can start being critical wherever you are. re: "am i supposed to do something about it?" no one is going to make you develop a critical framework for approaching your life. there is no force-feeding of interpretive tools and skills; no one is going to sit you down and supervise you until you are sufficiently critical . it's a choice you will have to make for yourself. for my part, i enjoy honing my critical capacities and actively work toward those goals because i never want other people to make choices for me about what i believe. i want my values and principles, the things that make up my life, to be chosen intentionally rather than handed down to me by the tides and trends of mass media, the propaganda in form of advertisements and targeted content and shows designed in a lab to appeal to my demographic, whatever that means. i want to be able to think for myself, rather than surrendering my agency and autonomy to those who are eager to think for me and make of me an uncritical, uncaring reproductive agent of the deathmaking systems that need our support to go on working.

one last freedman: "the increasingly totalitarian character of capitalism as a world system paradoxically makes it increasingly difficult to feel or even to theorize either capitalism in general or particular capitalist societies as wholes (just as fish, for instance, presumably do not feel wet and, even if endowed with rational faculties, would have great difficulty in producing the concept of wetness." being critical is stretching our capacities in pursuit of being able to be that fish that can conceptualize the wetness of water -- to see the things that were hidden from us before, often intentionally, and decide for ourselves whether we like what we see or whether we want to build something different .

#asks #anon #organs for the alternative

[fierrochase-falafel]

Censorship and CQL: Overanalysing how The Untamed adapted the 'Dafan Wen'

I don't think I've seen people talk about this a lot, and I really do love CQL a lot, so I'm not going out of my way to hate on it and I certainly don't think of myself as claiming truths out here; this is just my own view of a concept in CQL. That being said, hot take! I don't like the 'Dafan' Wen. It's just that something irks me about having a whole community of people that conveniently did nothing wrong in the series, and have only ever healed others. A lot of CQL or (some) CQL fanfictions seem to hinge on the Dafan Wen being completely innocent; not like those other Qishan Wen who are evil! Which ties in to a broader point about CQL's censorship. And I know MDZS and CQL are both different media but I want to try to justify while I feel this way (in chapters ;)).

1: Wen Qing adapted

Where do I start? I think this is best started with Wen Qing, their leader, and a character I love no matter what media she's in. Wen Qing is already changed up a lot in CQL. Her circumstances involving Wen Ruohan are forced upon her due to his power. Her brother's safety is being actively held over her head by 1 villain, the ultimate evil villain. She is designed to be a much more sympathetic character, someone who doesn't have a choice because of Wen Ruohan specifically. There is 1 piece of leverage and 1 villain, meaning that her motivations are a bit less nuanced. She wants to protect Wen Ning and that's that, but when not bound by Wen Ruohan's orders or risk to Wen Ning's life, she helps Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng practically as much as she can for someone who barely knows them (especially in the dancing statue episodes). What CQL is trying to show is that she is a good person, and committed to what the show recognises as good regardless of her circumstances.

Contrasting her with novel Wen Qing though, I think the latter shows a less dramatised but more conflicting dilemma as to whether or not she can be considered 'good', particularly by the other cultivators. Wen Qing is Wen Ruohan's favourite niece, who respects her deeply for her vast knowledge and skills. Unlike CQL Wen Qing, she is privileged in her position prior to the Sunshot Campaign and is arguably complicit in the Wen clan's wrongdoings because she never spoke out against them, which is what the Jin clan argued. This argument being used against her makes more sense here because of the benefits she recieved because of the Wen clan's abuse of power- even if she personally did nothing (which she calmly and clearly states to Wei Wuxian) and her branch "doesn’t have much blood on their hands", she benefitted from not being attacked or hit by the effects of war like all the other clans. When this was used against CQL Wen Qing though, the argument can automatically be dismissed as untrue. She was even locked in a DUNGEON for helping the Yunmeng siblings! And that's the conflict I want to draw attention to: where in CQL something is outright false or unreasonable, MDZS has a point that can be argued for and against with no real black-or-white conclusion.

If you were Wen Qing and you could either retain a comfortable position of privilege or lose everything to be tortured by your uncle, it's obviously more favourable to choose the former regardless of how you feel about the war! Especially if both your AND your brother's lives hinge on it! It's not a matter of the greater good: the fact is, Wen Qing's main priorities were being fulfilled in her position, and it's not like anyone was going to greet her with open arms on the other side, so did she really do anything wrong? I'd say she didn't, but that doesn't mean she wasn't voluntarily standing by as the other clans suffered as opposed to being threatened or locked up.

2: Considering some possible implications of Wei Wuxian saving the 'Dafan Wen'

CQL Wen Qing is absolved of any potential blame by making her initially morally grey actions explained away by being threatened and thus controlled by the villain. Similarly, CQL sets her family apart from the rest of the Wens by having them live on a different mountain and be treated poorly by the main Qishan Wen under Wen Ruohan. There is now a whole group of Wens who are 'special', effectively, for also suffering under the hand of the main Wen clan as much as the other clans- arguably more. This makes the treatment of the Dafan Wen one that is misunderstood, one that shows their allies (who saved them from Wen Ruohan's rule) becoming their enemies SOLELY by virtue of the Wen family name, and that is why Wei Wuxian protecting them is so important in CQL. Which isn't necessarily bad for a message, but one that is way less nuanced.

Wei Wuxian's complexity suffers from this- in the novel, I would argue a much more prominent reason he saves Wen Qing and the others are because Wen Qing and Wen Ning helped him in the past and he both wants to and feels obligated to help them particularly. Furthermore, he is angry that his personal wartime allies are having to go through this. Running off to the Burial Mounds was not on his radar exactly until he met Wen Qing again. It was partly due to his moral compass but partly due to his personal ties. However, if the Dafan Wen as a whole are fully victims and were never villains, then protecting them becomes a matter of righteousness at its core. Anyone complaining about it is being completely unfair to them and Wei Wuxian, and are just straight-up wrong. There's a difference between being ignorant and being wrong- where in MDZS the other clans show ignorance (definitely misguided but you see why argue what they do), in CQL the other clans are just wrong (come on, the peaceful Wen offshoot living on a whole different mountain can't possibly be unheard of by ANYONE at the banquet that night Wei Wuxian threatened Jin Zixun).

In CQL, one could also argue there's no room for Wei Wuxian to just-- not save the Wen siblings. They were some level of friends by that point, the Wen siblings had saved Wei Wuxian time and time again (even from a dog!) and their theoretically unproblematic clan had treated him well too. Him wanting to save them aligns his personal attachment to them with their 'goodness', making it impossible to not save them. In MDZS, Wei Wuxian both knows the Wen siblings less and does not have any special sense of justice attached because of their seperate branch, even if they didn't commit war crimes. This adds new dimensions to his reasons to protect the clan- even if he is protecting them out of care and justice, it shows Wei Wuxian's willingness to do anything for people if he believes he owes it to them. It also shows his willingness to help these specific Wens because of that, and his decision becomes less about justice for all Wens, as the only reason he is protecting these Wens over any other Wens is about Wen Qing and Wen Ning. It's not that these Wens were being subjugated by Wen Ruohan (they likely received similar benefits to Wen Qing) and thus deserved to be protected as 'good people', but that they were A) currently powerless and B) in the same group with and/or related to Wen Qing and Wen Ning. The unspoken implication of there being other Wens out there undergoing brutal treatment for remaining silent prior to the Sunshot Campaign is realistic and shows Wei Wuxian to be limited in who he has the capacity to protect and why he would protect them. It's never as simple as justice. I would argue that making the Burial Mounds Wens representative of regular Wens adds to the impact of Wei Wuxian's decision as a difficult one, and one much harder for the other clans to forgive.

Here's an alternate way to consider the implications. If the 'Dafan Wen' don't exist, then Wei Wuxian's decision is less about how 'good' the Wen clan (or any branch of it) are as a whole, and more about how unethical any Wens, Dafan or not, are being treated by the other clans. However, Wei Wuxian is 1 man with his own priorities and when he chooses who to protect, he chooses the affiliates of those who he knows were willing to help him rather than making any huge statement about unethical treatment of prisoners of war. He slaughtered many Wens on the battlefield after all, and he isn't about to save EVERY Wen who never helped him- this isn't feasible anyways and I feel like it also actively avoids the 'Wei Wuxian is the most righteous person ever' route it could've gone down.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------(DISCLAIMER:) It is important to note though that what crimes were committed by which Wen sect cultivators is an incredibly difficult topic to unravel. We know only some Wen sect cultivators were imprisoned due to their involvement in the war, but some innocent ones (who were initially free-roaming) like Wen Ning's group were forcefully taken too by cultivators like Jin Zixun facing no punishment or attention for doing so. I assume the latter happens a lot, and they were being treated like prisoners and labourers (as Granny Wen was) even if they were supposedly free-roaming before. None of the guards were surprised and referred to new Wen sect cultivators being sent there everyday- I feel like innocent or guilty in the war stops being a question. So we have all these questions about how fair is their treatment prisoners of war AND their treatment of other Wen sect cultivators. Much of said treatment isn't gone into detail as well, because I doubt the Jin clan or anyone else is particularly honest about it, and Wei Wuxian's own opinion on this is never physically said.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

3: The moral solution

What I'm getting at, in this roundabout way, is that in CQL there is an easier moral solution: the Dafan Wen tried to help the other clans as much as they could and were being threatened by the main Wen clan, therefore they should be protected despite their name. The other clans argue they're Wens and thus should not be protected, but they're not like the normal Wens- they're different and peaceful. It is clear: the good action is to protect the good people. It's almost a cop-out from showing that just because someone was benefited by or on the side of the villain by choice does not make them necessarily evil or anything (and certainly doesn't warrant punishing them the same way their higher-ups tortured you). This also immediately places the Dafan Wen and Wei Wuxian on the side of 'good' while placing the main Wen clan and anyone trying to actively argue for the murder of the Dafan Wen on the side of 'wrong' (like Nie Mingjue- not necessarily evil but definitely wrong).

Wei Wuxian is the ultimate hero character for standing up for what is right because it is right, as opposed to a character who isn't always able to fulfil that. Wei Wuxian's cultivation is also changed in CQL so as to not involve any genuine resurrection or control of the dead (in ghost form or otherwise). This softens the outrageous or grave aspects of what he actually did, and once again removes an aspect of his actions that can be viewed as morally wrong in any way. In my opinion atleast, MDZS is a lot harder to interpret in 1 specific way compared to CQL because these nuances within the Wen clan's and Wei Wuxian's actions exist, and often there is no right answer at all. While in MDZS Wei Wuxian is still morally ideal in the way he sticks to his guns (unlike SO many other characters), he doesn't get away with being blameless, but his CQL counterpart kind-of did nothing wrong.

4: (Unsurprisingly) Censorship makes a difference

This being said, I know CQL did their absolute utomost to translate this story to a live-action in the best way possible. Many of the changes they made (having the whole cast be involved since the very beginning, for instance) served the web series format in the best way possible, getting viewers invested in them from the get-go in this medium. Even these changes I've talked about may not really take a huge amount away from the story; after all, Wen Qing and Wen Ning's branch were by and large not involved in all the Sunshot campaign killing in both versions of the story. I am perhaps just making a mountain out of a molehill. However, I'd say the difference between their portrayals is still significant enough to change the connotations of the story as a whole.

The main conflict in the past was Wei Wuxian's decision to stand up for the residents of the Burial Mounds, and the involvement of the rest of the cultivation world in his demise. The context to this conflict being changed also changes the takeaway from this conflict.

My takeaway from these changes is that this is CQL fitting in with censorship guidelines to avoid depictions of moral greyness or any seeming lack of righteousness in the 'good guys'. I'm no genius on censorship guidelines and I am not Chinese, so I'm going off of my limited somewhat-academic and online forum research, but any content "transgressing social morality" (wording taken from here) is prohibited.

A lot of people online who are opposed to CQL's changes regarding this are angry about the idea of villains needing to be hands down the main evil, and I understand. Even though I knew it was going to happen, I really was disappointed getting to the end of CQL where they go "Su She was playing the flute all this time! He was the one who got Jiang Yanli killed!" I appreciate that CQL only decided to really engage with this at the very end and not embellishing Jin Guangyao's role in Wei Wuxian's demise even more. Without watching the last 2 episodes, it was almost (key word: almost) as if they hadn't had to censor the original death scene at all. I also do think though, that the censorship of 'heroes' goes more unnoticed when talking about this show. The censorship in CQL of Wei Wuxian's morally grey actions or fatal mistakes for example, like by not having him inadvertently cause Jiang Yanli's death. There's also CQL showing him repeatedly talking about how he wants to stand with justice with Lan Wangji (which I'm pretty sure doesn't happen in the books), just to hone in on how righteous they consistently are. Referring to Jiang Yanli's death, when Wei Wuxian sticking to his personal code of justice has consequences that betray what he wanted to happen, it isn't easy anymore for him to be a hero. His decisions are harder- he didn't have his cultivation under control after all no matter how much he wanted to, he wasn't blameless no matter how well-intentioned his actions were. Like Wei Wuxian, I believe Wen Qing and her branch of the Wen clan are also censored by having them as part of the different Dafan Wen clan, again to show all of them as unquestionably good or blameless in the series when they aren't in the novel.

5: CQL, MDZS, and fan interpretation

Around when I was introduced to CQL (for which I can never thank you enough, @iliketodecompose), I remember being told told that the best way to watch CQL is as its own series as opposed to an adaptation of MDZS. I think this is a good way to perceive and love the series in light of its differences to the novel, because even little differences like these can change what the story says. Maybe some people agree with me and some think I'm reading too much into it / have misinterpreted the series entirely, in which case I'm glad to hear alternate opinions or justifications, but I do not want to engage with "you're 100% wrong about this piece of fiction" comments. Opinions about the clarity of how MDZS is meant to be interpreted range far and wide; there are bound to be whole groups of people who disagree with me for several reasons but that's just how it goes. Having looked into other people's opinions across the internet, I've expanded my horizons to other interpretations as well. I don't think we have to be bound to a single interpretation; I've found myself agreeing with many people's arguments even if they partially disagree with or come in from a different angle than my own.

In conclusion...even if I lost the plot a bit in the middle there, I hope I've been able to justify my point of view here as to why I'm not a fan of the idea of Wen Qing's branch being an identifiably different branch to the rest of the main Wen clan. Peace-!

#wen qing #wen ning #wei wuxian #dafan wen #wen clan #the untamed #cql #cql meta #mdzs #mdzs meta #posts originating from my brain #analysis time by me so I can track them in my tags

[dollyyun]

𝒐𝒏𝒆 𝒐𝒇 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒈𝒊𝒓𝒍𝒔 | chap 10

SYPNOSIS: wherein Hwang Stella's life is tangled in a predicament involving her clandestine identity as a racer, her seemingly daily life as the official heir to the Hwang Empire, and seven guys with whom she has a complex history with.

PAIRING: enhypen members x fem oc.

GENRE: 18+ (mdni), reverse harem, chaebols, semi-college & racing, eventual adulthood, non-idol au, eventual enha being f1 drivers, multiple pov (this fic is written in first pov).

WARNINGS: mention of abuse, expletives.

WORD COUNT: 10k+

FEATURING: ITZY Yeji

TAGLIST: @aishigrey @kgneptun

🍒 MASTERLIST 🍒

Since Yeji is a part of my trusted inner circle, I decided to reveal to her my passion for racing. I expect her to berate me since it is a dangerous motorsport, but instead, she gives me a proud smile and tells me to keep continuing to do whatever I want.

"But what about your position as the heir?" Yeji asks as she sits across from me. We are presently at a fine dining restaurant for dinner, and the best thing about dining out with your older sister is that you don't even have to use your money as she will be the one paying the bills.

I sigh, leaning my back against the leather seat. "That's the thing. Even though I am passionate about racing, I know that I'll have to let go one day when the time comes."

Yeji offers me a sympathetic smile as she puts down her glass of wine. "You know, if being the heir is not what you want, then you can always just back out."

"No, being an heir is equally important to me." I assert, though there is ambivalence lingering in the air. "I've been trained since I was fifteen, after Oppa was disowned," I pause. Bitterness touches my tongue as I recall. "So I can't allow all my hard work to go to waste. Besides, I don't think I have much of a choice, given how I'm the most capable and competent compared to Rena, which was why they didn't want to choose Rena in the first place."

"They're taking advantage of you." There is a scowl on Yeji's face. "The least they could do is treat you better, but no. They're still as insufferable as they were on day one."

Curiosity sparks within me. "Before I was born, were they as cruel as they are now?"

Yeji seems to be reminiscing while the frown on her lips deepens. "Minhyuk wasn't that violent. Sure, he had slapped our brother a few times due to how rebellious he was, but he didn't hit me. That was until after Mother got pregnant with you. Why do you ask?"

My eyes turn downcast. "It's just that our parents, especially father, seem to loathe me more than he does to you and Oppa." Then I recall a certain memory. "The other night, when he punished me, he said something about how mother should've aborted me. I guess he hated me even before I was born."

Not only has that statement been engraved in my mind, but Minhyuk also said something about how he made me the heir so he couldn't get to me. The question is: Who is he?

"I wish I could bring you with me to live in New York." Yeji's statement brings me back to reality. "If you had lived with me, you could do anything your heart desires, and I would provide for you financially until you're stable enough to stand on your own."

I can already imagine what it's like to move to New York, one of the cities I've always wanted to go to, and to have the freedom of not being tethered to the Hwang name anymore. Even the thought of it is already rather tempting, but I know I can't.

"The only goal I have in mind is to bring Oppa and Uncle Minjun together once I wield full authority and power. Speaking of, I've hired someone to do my dirty work since, for some reason, our parents, especially father, forbade me to ask questions about Uncle and even threatened me not to search for him."

Intrigued, Yeji leans forward with an eyebrow arched. "Dirty work? Am I supposed to be worried?"

"No. In fact, you should be glad that I've never given up on searching for Uncle Minjun." I smile. "Though there hasn't been any update yet, I'm positive that I'm getting closer to finding him."

"Uncle Minjun. We had lots of great memories with him." Yeji smiles faintly while nostalgia gleams in her eyes.

My heart aches. "We sure did. He's the main reason why I'm passionate about racing, because he used to be a racer too."

"At least one of us inherited the racing genes." Yeji chuckles.

"But it's peculiar, though." My smile falters. "A week before Uncle Minjun's disappearance, he gave me a debit card and made me swear that our parents could never know about it."

"Really? But why?"

"I don't know, and I don't know why I'm the only one who received it." I answer honestly, my eyebrows furrowing. "The amount is more than I thought. I haven't used it, though. I'm just saving it for an emergency."

"If I weren't so jealous, I'd say his favourite niece was you." Yeji gives me a playful scowl, to which I roll my eyes. "But Uncle has always treated and loved you more than our own father has."

"Yeah." A sad smile dawns on my lips. Just before Yeji can speak, we are interrupted by a certain someone who has me staring at him with my jaw unhinging.

I have never seen Jungwon decked out in a formal suit before, let alone how his hair seems to be a tad permed, looking incredibly attractive than he usually is. He offers me a smile with his dimple that I so badly want to poke. "Hey, Stella."

"Jungwon." I attempt to compose myself, but my eyes continue to shamelessly check him out. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm having dinner with my father and his business partners. We're seated on the second floor. But I want to head out to get some breather." Jungwon informs before his eyes shift to Yeji, and they widen. "Yeji Noona?"

"Jungwon." Yeji acknowledges him with a smile. "My, my. You're all grown up now."

Yeji used to help me out by sneaking Jungwon into the mansion whenever I wanted to hang out with him. Our endeavours in the past were certainly memorable.

Jungwon smiles sheepishly, making my heart flutter. "Thank you. I haven't seen you in years."

"Oh, you didn't know that I moved to New York years ago?" Yeji asks before looking at me in confusion. "You didn't tell him?"

Right. I forget that Yeji didn't know about our friendship fallout.

"Long story short, we weren't friends for seven years, but we've already reconciled." I answer. "Anyway, nice meeting you, Jungwon. Let's go, Unnie."

"Actually, Jungwon can keep you company." Yeji stands as she grabs her purse. She gives me a smile—a cunning one at that. "I have to meet an old friend at a bar. Jungwon, be a dear and send my darling sister home."

"What?" I look at her in disbelief. "Yeji─" But Yeji leaves our table in a swift manner.

Despite the fact that there is no air of awkwardness, Jungwon and I still haven't talked about the kiss we had. I look at him, just to accidentally lock eyes with him.

"It's okay if you don't want to accompany me. I'm sure you'd want to head back to your father." I say, chuckling nervously.

"Honestly, I'm dying to get out of here." He extends his hand to me. "Would you care to join me?"

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

With my black dress that matches his suit, we look like we could be a couple. Silence engulfs us as we walk hand-in-hand on the pavement. Holding his hand has become the norm for me. I like the way he holds me, like he wants to protect me from harm.

"Stella, can I ask you something?" He breaks the silence, prompting me to look at him. His tone sounds serious, as does the look in his eyes.

I halt my steps, and I notice his car is parked by the curb. "Of course."

Hesitancy resides in his gaze momentarily. "Would you be mad at me again if I leave?"

Confusion clouds my head. "What do you mean?" Then comes the sadness. "Are you leaving?"

"No. At least not yet since nothing has been confirmed." He quickly answers. "I just wanted to know if you'd be mad."

"Maybe, but I'll try to understand your situation." I pause before my eyes turn crestfallen. "Who am I kidding? I'm not going to be mad, but devastated instead. You're my best friend, Jungwon. You leaving me the second time will inevitably hurt me."

"What if I say that I'll be the first to find you after all is well?" He cradles my face, allowing me to lean into his gentle touch. "What if I tell you that once I find you, I'm never going to let you go, ever?"

The butterflies in my tummy intensify the longer he gazes deeply into my eyes. "So you're going to have me locked up in a tower?" I jest, attempting to get rid of the flutters.

His eyes seem to darken at the thought. "Maybe. You seem to underestimate how possessive I can get."

"Funny." I force out a chuckle.

"I'm not joking around, Bubs." His hand slithers down to wrap around my waist, pulling me close to him before he slowly backs me up until my back hits his car.

My eyes widen in shock, and my mouth is unable to form any words due to Jungwon's abrupt turn of behaviour. The way he is staring at me alone feels intimate. His touch on my body feels electrifying.

"Jungwon." I utter his name nervously while my heart is pounding hard against my chest, feeling his body on mine. The addictive scent of his cologne makes me lightheaded.

"I've been holding myself back for so long, Stel." His voice drops to a lower octave. "I've been waiting patiently, dying to touch you just like my best friends do."

My breaths catch in my throat as he leans down to my ear, his lips touching my earlobe. "I know, Stel. I know that you have long since become one of their girls."

With each passing second, I feel breathless and intoxicated by the thought of my best friend desiring me. Butterflies awaken in my tummy at the moment his lips touch my neck.

"Jungwon, not here." I say shakily, aware that we are still in an open area.

"You're right." I detect annoyance in his voice before he pulls away. He opens the passenger door for me, allowing me to enter.

As I wait patiently for him to drive, I don't know what awaits me next.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

What I anticipated had something to do with Jungwon's lips on mine and his hands roaming around my body, but what I hadn't anticipated was heading over to Kim Sunoo's apartment, as he had urgently called Jungwon earlier in the car.

"Were you two on a date or something?" Sunoo asks, his eyes narrowing at our attire, before he looks at Jungwon in disbelief. "Was that why you ditched me for Stella? I thought you promised to accompany me to race!"

Jungwon rolls his eyes in annoyance. "As if you wouldn't ditch me for Stella."

Sunoo pauses before his eyes direct me, and he unfurls a smirk. "I would ditch anyone for you, darling." He taps his finger on my nose, causing me to blink my eyes while my cheeks feel warm.

"For the record, I didn't ditch you for Stella. My father forced me to go for dinner with his business partners." Jungwon sighs. "And I hate this stupid tie." He grumbles, touching his black necktie and attempting to remove it, while I am in awe of how he is doing it in an oddly attractive way. "Do you mind if I borrow your clothes? I do need proper attire if we are going to race." He asks Sunoo.

"Fine." Sunoo sighs loudly as he drags his feet to go to his room. "But you owe me!"

As soon as Sunoo is out of sight, I avert my gaze elsewhere, feeling his gaze on my face as he is leaning against the wall with his arms crossed. Jungwon and I haven't had a proper conversation since our moment earlier. I was mostly hesitant and embarrassed to face him.

I clear my throat as I rise from the couch. "I'm just gonna grab a drink."

I walk past him, but a startled gasp leaves my lips when his hand grabs my arm firmly before he makes me turn around to face him. "Jungwon��"

Jungwon silences me by kissing me squarely on the lips while his other arm is wrapped around my waist to hold me steady and the other one cradles my face. He kisses me with such urgency, as if he's afraid that Sunoo might come out any time soon.

"Jungwon." I whisper, feeling short of breath as soon as he pulls away. "Don't ever do that again. Sunoo might catch us."

His lips unfurl a soft, attractive smirk, and he doesn't seem to have the intention of letting me go. "That's part of the thrill, isn't it?"

"Jungwon!" We hear Sunoo calling for him from his room. "Do you want the red or blue one?"

Instead of answering Sunoo, Jungwon slams his lips against mine once more as he moves me to the kitchen, pinning me against the wall. I want to be furious at him, but the way he is kissing me weakens me.

"Yang Jungwon!"

Jungwon pulls away, breathing heavily, while the thrill in his eyes is apparent as they stare straight into my panicked ones. "Your pick, Sunoo." He answers loudly.

"Jungwon!" I whisper harshly right after he pecks my lips briefly. I ignore how hot my cheeks feel. It feels like we're in a forbidden relationship, not wanting anyone to find out about our scandalous act.

His smirk widens before he leans in to kiss my cheek. "You're so adorable, Bubs."

"Hold on! I'm trying to find the red one for you!" Sunoo informs.

Suggestiveness and mischievousness glint in Jungwon's eyes. "More time for us." He whispers with a boyish grin.

The next thing I know, my hands are in his hair, his hands on my body, and my lips on his move in perfect harmony with a symphony of desire and longing.

"I need to tell you something." I say gruffly as I land another hard blow to the punching bag. Sweats are trickling down my skin, and my white tee is sticking to my body due to how drenched I am. Panting heavily, my eyes shift to Jake, who is at the bench press while Jay is helping the man out. Earlier, we agreed to work out at my gym.

I have been keeping it to myself, and the longer I do, the more my feelings seem to be erratic. Maybe I have a death wish, or maybe I don't, but I need to let Jake know about it, even though he might skin my ass alive. The guy is extremely possessive.

"Who?" Jake asks with a grunt, the muscles on his biceps flexing. "Me or Jay?"

Right, I forgot for a moment that Jay used to have an illicit affair with Stella. Recalling the last time he confronted Heeseung and brawled with him, I guess the guy is possessive as well. Great.

Although I'm aware that we all agreed to never fight anymore, especially over a girl, sometimes their feelings may change.

"You." But I answer without hesitation. Plus, Jake had been with Stella first. "But you have to promise me that you won't punch me. You too, Jay."

Jake finally finishes before straightening his back as he sits up. His face contorts into confusion as he wipes off his sweat with a small towel. "Now you're making me want to punch you."

Jay gives Jake a smirk. "Allow me."

"It's not funny, guys." I sigh, removing my boxing gloves. "It's about Stella." I pause, hesitating for a moment, as I scan their faces. "The other night, when I sent her home, I kissed her."

I swear the silence is resounding, and I can't decipher the emotions in their eyes. I run my fingers through my hair. "I admit that I no longer hate her, but I don't know why the fuck I kissed her."

"I knew it." Jay's blank face breaks into a grin. "What did I tell you? Your feelings would change the longer you stick around her."

"Sue me." I groan. "I couldn't help it. There's more to her than just her beauty. All those moments we've spent together, especially during my time coaching her, have shown me the sides of her I never knew existed." As my mind drifts to her, a small smile finds its way to my lips. "She gave me advice even when I didn't ask for it but needed it. The same goes for her. She even laughed at my lame jokes."

"Wow. I never would've thought I'd see the day where Park Sunghoon would be smitten over a girl." Jake speaks up, smirking lightly. "Especially when that girl happens to be the love of my life."

Guilt dawns on me. "I'm sorry, man. It just happened. I didn't have the intention to steal your girl."

Jake shrugs his shoulders, appearing to be unfazed by the revelation. "I guess she's our girl now."

"What?" Both Jay and I stare at him dumbfounded, but Jake remains collected. "What do you mean by our girl?"

"Isn't it obvious? She has us wrapped around her pretty little fingers, and we've all kissed her." Jake states. "I know you expected me to get all possessive and mad, but I'm totally fine about it. Besides, Heeseung even suggested that we share her."

"Share her?" Jay gulps visibly. "But we've never even shared a girl before. I mean, we're talking about Hwang Stella here! And she's not just any girl!"

"I'm not into sharing," I drawl. "But if it means that we won't ever have to fight over her, then I'm in."

"Aside from Heeseung, do you think the others like Stella as well?" Jay asks, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Just yesterday I saw Stella with Sunoo, and from the look of it, Sunoo seemed smitten for her too." Jake chuckles breathily. "The bastard won't even leave her for a minute."

"I think Ni-Ki likes her too." I tell them as soon as I recall the way Ni-Ki looked at her with a familiar sentiment I know all too well. "Just great. The seven of us sharing the same girl? Won't that be too overwhelming?"

"Unless you want to back out, then it will feel a little less overwhelming." Jay gives me a smirk. "Plus, the lesser competition, the better."

"It isn't a competition if we all agree to share her." I snap at him, wanting to punch that annoying smirk of his.

"That settles, then." Jake rises from the bench. "We'll just have to let the rest know about it."

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

When the next day arrives, I decide to skip my last two lectures and head to our lounging room. I had enough fucking idiots who couldn't even brainstorm ideas, let alone participate in our group project. That's one of the things I hate about college.

With a scowl that still persists on my face, I push open the door and enter, but I halt my steps as soon as I spot Stella on the couch. She appears to have been typing some sort of essay on her laptop. She stops whatever she's doing and diverts her gaze towards me.

"Hey, Sunghoon." She gives me a smile that causes my heart rate to spike, as does how gorgeous she looks. "I hope you don't mind that I'm using this room to do my assignments."

I immediately compose myself. "Not at all. You're always welcome here anyway." I tell her as I make my way to the couch and settle myself next to her. "I thought you'd be in classes."

"I ended mine early." She informs, watching as I plop down next to her comfortably. "You seem rather stressed."

"Not entirely. I'm rather annoyed at our group mates." Naturally, I start to vent to her. "They're difficult to work with and couldn't even brainstorm ideas. I have had to step in and do all the fucking things." I scowl. "The worse part is that I have to survive another week with them."

Stella offers me a sympathetic smile. "I understand you. I hate group projects too."

"Really?" The renowned smart-pants Hwang Stella hates something that is academic-related. I tilt my body to give her my full attention. "What else do you hate?"

"Ummm, my parents," She lists them off, prompting me to chuckle at her first answer. "Liars, insects, and you used to be on the list as well. In fact, you're on the second spot on the list."

I raise my eyebrow at her. "You really hated me that much, huh?"

"You did too." She retorts, rolling her eyes, and fuck does she look attractive doing so. "When did you decide to unhate me?"

"I can't exactly pinpoint when, but it just happened." I tell her honestly as the air around us shifts into something that is unexplainable.

Her alluring eyes flicker down to my lips before looking back into my eyes. "Was that why you kissed me the other night?"

I was hoping she wouldn't bring that up. Fuck me and my self-control for kissing her.

"Do you like me, Sunghoon?" She asks, and her voice drops into a whisper while I realise the lack of space between us.

I gulp harshly. "Of course. That's why I unhate you, right? That's why we're friends now." I'm just spewing words because it's so fucking hard to control myself around her, especially when she looks utterly kissable and alluring right now.

I see disappointment and annoyance in her eyes. "I'm not stupid, Sunghoon. You kissed me the other night because you see me more than just a friend."

"And if I say I do?" A muscle ticks in my jaw as the intensity between our gazes sparks something within me. "What are you going to do about it?"

The confidence she emitted earlier dissipates as she deflates. "I don't know. It just feels weird because we've always been enemies and hated each other's guts."

"You want to know how to make it less weird?" I pull her by the nape, bringing her close to me until her breath fans on my lips. Her hooded eyelids are fluttering close, and I take my cue to connect our lips.

It starts off slow, with me taking my time to savour her lips, which taste like a hint of cherry, but soon, we're kissing each other like two lovers who have been separated for a long time. The next moment I know, she is on top of me with her hands in my hair and my hands on her body, pulling her impossibly close to me. The sound of our lips smacking wetly and her faint moans into my mouth turn me on even further.

She pulls away from my lips to catch her breath, fluttering her eyes open and meeting my gaze. As she pants heavily, her lips are slightly swollen by the intensity of our make-out. When she moves her hips forward, I groan, feeling her core hitting mine.

"Sorry." She whispers, her cheeks turning a shade of pink.

"You're such a fucking tease, princess." I have no intention of letting her go with my hands on her waist. Her sultry gaze alone is enough for me to do things to her. "Tell me, what are you like with the others?"

Her hands drape over my shoulders. "What?"

A smirk tugs at my lips as I bring my hand to caress her cheek. "Do you like it rough? Gentle?" I can't help but pull her down abruptly, bringing a gasp from her mouth. I grab a fist of her hair, though enough to apply pressure and not hurt her, stopping her just close enough with our lips almost touching. "Tell me all the dirty stuff you like." I rasp as she pants lightly through her parted lips. "I'll make them happen."

"You're kinky." She gasps again just as I pull her head to the back, making her neck bare at me before I place a kiss on the skin. "Sunghoon─"

In an instant, I have her pinned to the couch with both hands on top of her head, as I have them locked in my strong grip. She gasps cutely and releases a breathy moan when I press my knee into her core. "What if the others come barging in?" She whimpers as I trail my kisses along her jawline down to her neck.

"I won't stop. I'll let them know that I can pleasure you better than them, show them I can fuck you better." I pull away from her neck, and with my other hand, I wrap it around her throat, enough to assert the dominance I have over her. The smirk on my lips widens as I see the lust in her eyes. "You're liking the idea, aren't you? You dirty princess."

"Sunghoon." She pleads, moving her hips with her core sliding on my knee as though to find relief. I can almost feel how soaked she is. "Please."

Music to my ears. I apply pressure to her neck again, having her gasp once more. I lean down to her face, and my lips teasingly graze against her panting ones. "Only a slut likes the idea of voyeurism." I speak harshly into her mouth. "You're my slut, aren't you, princess?"

I can feel her thighs attempting to clench. "Yes." She whimpers.

With my other free hand, I grab her chin, forcing her to open her mouth for me before I spit into her mouth. "Swallow." She does, moaning as she heeds my command. "Good fucking girl." I praise her softly. "Now, you're going to have to be quiet or else I'll stop, understood?"

Her sultry eyes flutter while the atmosphere feels hotter than usual. "Yes, sir."

I have been contemplating and staying quiet since Heeseung decided to make me accompany him to the race. My mind is occupied with a lot of things, but the idea of sharing Stella and the plan my father forced me to do consume my thoughts.

"Jay." Heeseung's hand presses on my shoulder firmly, pulling me back to reality. "I've been calling for you. You okay?"

I sigh, roughly ruffling my hair. "I don't even know, Heeseung."

Heeseung settles himself next to me with his arms crossed over his chest as we lean against my car. "Talk to me."

I bite my lip harshly. "Jake told us about the idea of sharing Stella, but I can't imagine if she ever finds out that─" I pause, hesitating. "Fuck. I didn't want things to happen, and I didn't even want to be a part of their schemes!"

"I get you." Heeseung says quietly, prompting me to look at him with wide eyes. "Yeah, I know about it. I guess your parents and mine are working together."

My heart clenches in guilt. "If I don't do what they ordered me to, then I'll have to face the consequences."

"That goes the same for me." He smiles sadly. "What a fucked-up world we live in."

"More like fucked-up parents." Sunoo's voice draws our attention, and we spot him and Ni-Ki approaching us, suited in their racing gear. "In fact, all of our parents are in this."

"I don't want to hurt Stella." Ni-Ki says, as the pain in his eyes is evident.

Heeseung leans away from my car. "We all don't."

Ni-Ki shoots Sunoo a scowl. "And now, Sunoo here thought it was a brilliant idea to inform his parents about Stella's secret."

"What secret?" I ask immediately.

The three exchange glances before Sunoo speaks up. "Stella is a racer as well. In fact, she is the mysterious racer Junho welcomed."

"There's no way." I scoff, denying. "Stella is not the type of person who looks like she races."

"Come on, Park." Heeseung sighs. "You're not that oblivious to the fact that the mysterious racer has the same hair shade as Stella."

I gulp down. "It could be a mere coincidence."

"Denying won't do you good." Sunoo tuts while his eyes seem to trail behind me. "If you really want to prove to us that the mysterious racer isn't Stella, I guess this is your chance."

I turn around to see what they're all looking at, and I spot the mysterious racer pulling up at her station. I don't know why I'm still in denial, even when I finally realise how her physique looks awfully similar to Stella's.

"Fine." I proceed to wear my helmet. "I'll just have to catch her in action."

Maybe Minhyuk and Jihyun were right all along about how I'm deviating from my focal point in my obligation as the heir. Just yesterday, my tutor came over, and she reprimanded me for how I've been giving poor performances, of which she would have to inform Minhyuk. I guess I'll be punished again once he comes back.

Even so, it'll be worth it. I should feel regret and reprove myself for changing so much in a matter of months ever since I willingly decided to be more than involved with the guys. But I don't, not even in the slightest.

I can't help it. They're akin to drugs, making me addictive and impossible to stay away from. They consume my thoughts, intoxicating my whole senses. I love being the centre of attention in their eyes, even more so because of their blatant affection for me.

Fuck, I'm spiralling deeper than I thought, and I don't know if there is even a way out of this. It feels as though I'm trapped, chained up, and hidden in a tower with the keys in their hands, away from the world, willing to let them do whatever they want.

I value my position as the heir, but even for a moment, I want to be traded and just become their girl, solely to serve them and do whatever they ask me to. It is as though my life purpose now is them.

My parents were right. I am too far gone and astray.

And so, I find myself in this position, with his hands on my body and his lips devouring me as though he has been starved, making out in the back seat of his car while he has me seated on his lap.

"I'm so fucking mad at you." Jay murmurs against my lips. "You could've told me that you were a racer as well. I'd do anything to keep your secret safe, baby."

Just fifteen minutes ago, Jay confronted me after he won the race against me. He taunted me and made me reveal my identity to him while the other guys watched from afar. Amid the anger, he was shocked as well when our eyes met. Before I knew it, he dragged me elsewhere, away from prying eyes, which led to us in his car. We were arguing heatedly, and the tension between us was about to snap.

I hum against his lips before pulling away. My hands are gently treading the back of his hair while his hands rub the sides of my waist, awakening the butterflies in my tummy. "Just as I said, I didn't want anyone to find out, but I should've known it wasn't easy." I shrug my shoulders.

Jay sighs, raising his hand to my cheek and holding it affectionately. "I won't let anyone outside of our inner circle discover who you are."

I place my hand on his, leaning into his palm. "Thank you, Jay."

A smile graces his handsome face before he leans in to give me a peck on the lips. "You're welcome. You know, you're amazing." He deepens his lips on mine, sighing. "You've never failed to blow my mind away by how amazing you are."

"Yeah?" I chuckle softly into the kiss. "What else?"

"Greedy for compliments, are we now?" He smirks, pulling away from the kiss. "You're just so fucking perfect, baby. If we weren't needed to head back, I'd bring you back to my place so we can meddle about, with me worshipping your body all night."

I hum lazily as I drape my hands around his neck. "If you're brave enough, do it."

His eyes darken. "Don't test me, baby. You know I would."

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

"My parents and Rena are currently in Miami. They'll be back in like three weeks." I remove my leather jacket as I am beginning to feel stuffy, to which Sunoo assists me. "My older sister, Yeji, has been here for about a week now, and I'm glad. I've missed her." I tell them, and a smile automatically tugs at my lips as I talk about Yeji.

Presently, we are seated in a circle on the asphalt ground. Their attention is fixated on me as they listen to my blabbering attentively. I tell them about my older siblings and my memorable moments with them. But the more I talk about my older brother, the more my heart aches, yearning for him.

"I'm sorry." I rub my nape sheepishly while my cheeks feel warm. "I've been rambling and didn't give you guys the chance to speak."

"Actually, we love to listen to you talk." Ni-Ki tells me, the assurance in his eyes puts me at ease.

"Yeah, you look happier when you talk about your loved ones." Heeseung points out, smiling at me faintly.

"What about your uncle?" Sunoo asks as he sits next to me diagonally. "Earlier, you mentioned something about you racing that made you feel as though you're closer to your uncle. He's a racer too?"

"Was." I say, smiling sadly. "He disappeared out of a blue, leaving no trace of him behind years ago. He treated me better than my parents ever did. In fact, I see him as more of a father than Minhyuk himself."

"And your older brother?" Jay raises his eyebrow. "We all know about your parents disowning the original heir. The media outlet spread the news fast."

I sigh, recalling. "My older sister and I are unable to track him too. But it's okay. I have a plan of my own that involves finding both my uncle and brother once I officially wield the power and authority."

I ignore them when they exchange wary glances at each other. "It's really fine, guys. I have meticulously planned out everything. It's just a matter of months."

"Can we help?" Sunoo asks. "We just want to take extra caution, especially concerning your safety. You can always lean on us for help."

"Sunoo's right." Ni-Ki nods his head. "Whatever you need, Stel, we're at your service."

Butterflies intensify in my tummy as I look at each of their faces, the determination and willingness written on them makes my heart swell with something. "I will."

"Are you guys ready for the Seoul Grand Prix next month?" Heeseung's question draws our attention. "We'll be competing against racers across SoKor."

"Fuck yeah." Sunoo smirks. "I'm more than ready."

Right, the Seoul Grand Prix. It happens every three years. It'll be my first time ever participating, and I can't help but feel anxious. Incidents may happen at a major event like that, given the fact that there may be others who are envious and have malicious intent to bring downfall to their opponents.

"I'm not that ready." I confess, releasing a shaky breath. "I still lack my skills."

"What? But you've already proven how amazing you are at racing." Ni-Ki counters.

"Riki's right." Jay says. "I'm sure you'll do great, as you always do."

"Well, we can't be too complacent." I rise from the ground and dust off my hands. With my hands on my waist, I look at them with a grin. "Let's all compete. Losers will have to forfeit."

Heeseung unfurls a smirk as he stands as well. "Music to our ears."

"You're going down, darling." Sunoo teases me.

"You're going down." I retort before yelping out when Riki slings an arm around me roughly, especially with his tall height that overpowers my figure. "Riki!"

As we make our way to our motorsport vehicles while engaging in banter and our laughter filling the cold air, my heart warms as I am surrounded by them. More importantly, I feel homed.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

The guys and I ended our ventures late last night, resulting in me to feel slightly lethargy as soon as I wake up. As I tie my hair into a messy bun, I make my way to Yeji's room, hoping that she doesn't have any plans for today. But I stop in my tracks when I spot her walking out of Minhyuk's office, probably snooping around given how she looks as though she doesn't want to be caught.

Feeling amused by my dearest older sister's antics, I lean sideways against the wall with my arms crossed. "You do realise that there is a CCTV camera inside his office?"

Yeji's body jolts up in surprise before she turns around with her hand on her chest. She shoots me a scowl. "You scared me, Stel. I thought you were one of the helpers."

I shake my head, chuckling lightly, as I approach her. "What were you even doing inside? You might get into deep trouble if Father ever decides to check the CCTV."

Yeji waves her hand dismissively at me. "What could he even do to me? I don't live under this roof, so technically, I don't have to abide by the rules here."

"Consider me jealous." I state plainly. "But seriously, what were you doing?"

Yeji bites her lips, looking as if she is a child getting caught for stealing candy. "I was bored and curious about what Minhyuk has in his office."

"Uhuh." I raise my eyebrow. "So, anything interesting?"

Yeji seems hesitant for some reason. "Actually, there is. Come."

Yeji grabs my hand before dragging me into Minhyuk's office. Without uttering a word, I allow her to drag me as she pleases until we stop at his desk. I watch her in silence as she squads down and pulls one of the drawers before she grabs a file with the wording 'confidential' stamped on it.

Yeji rises and puts down the file on the table in front of me. She flips it open for me. "Read it."

With a frown tugging at my lips and the confusion I feel, I examine the documents. My birth certificate is part of the documents too. As I carefully read through the others, my eyes widen as something catches my eye.

"A DNA test?" I speak out loud as I hold the paper.

"Not only is it a DNA test, but it's yours." Yeji says quietly, her finger pointing at a certain date. "That's your birth date, right? Then there's your name."

My face contorts into confusion. "But why would Father have this? Unless I'm adopted." My heart feels as though it has been stabbed by a knife at the thought of me not being blood related to my older siblings.

"I don't think so. It also states here that the DNA test was conducted when Mother was pregnant with you." Yeji places her hand firmly on my tensed shoulder. "It's okay, Stel. Even if you were adopted, you'd always be my baby sister. I'm sure Oppa would feel the same way too."

But Yeji's mere sentiment doesn't alleviate the confusion I feel. I begin to check the other documents, reading thoroughly while my heart feels uneasy. A sigh of frustration leaves my lips. "It doesn't add up! There must be some documents that are missing."

"You know what? Let's leave this and get out of here." Yeji attempts to snatch away the documents, but I stubbornly refuse, not until I find answers. "Stella."

"I need to know." I say, looking at her with desperation. "Please, Unnie."

Yeji's lips flatten. "Let's have lunch first, okay? We'll find the missing documents later."

I slouch my shoulders in defeat. "Fine."

"Plus, you have friends coming over, right?" Yeji asks, as if she is attempting to distract me, and it works. "I'd love to meet them."

The exhaust of our motorbikes' engines blares loudly as we speed on the road. A smirk pulls at my lips behind the visor of my helmet, loving the thrill of riding along with my best friends. Thankfully, there are not many vehicles on the road, allowing us to play around a little as we taunt each other with how fast we can go.

Soon, we have arrived as we enter through the gates, pulling over on the massive asphalt road that allows us to park our vehicles. I turn off the ignition and remove my helmet, adjusting my dishevelled hair while the background noise consists of my best friends engaging in silly banter.

"You're such a show-off, Park!" Sunoo tells Sunghoon with a scowl on his face.

"You tell him, Sunoo!" Jay barks out a laugh, with Jungwon joining him.

Sunghoon gives him a smug look in return. "Just say that you're jealous of my skills, Kim."

"Did you see my moves?" Ni-Ki asks us rather excitedly. "That's a new skill of mine."

"Yeah, but it's dangerous, Riks." Jake frowns. "You could've gotten into serious trouble if you weren't skilled enough."

I shake my head at them. Such children. My gaze settles on the unfamiliar mansion, which looks bigger than my parents' one.

"Let's get going." I announce sternly as I proceed to walk ahead first. "We're already late."

The guys comply, following suit. I still hear them exchanging words and insults, but I ignore them. I just can't wait to meet Stella again, even though we just saw each other last night.

Before I can press the bell, the door slowly opens and reveals an unfamiliar lady whose features are sharp yet elegant. This must be Stella's older sister. Hwang Yeji.

"Oh!" Yeji appears to be genuinely taken aback as she looks at us. "Stella's friends?"

"Yes." Jungwon answers for us, to which Yeji beams at him with a smile. I guess Jungwon and her know each other, considering that he's Stella's childhood best friend.

"Come on in!" She opens the door wide for us, offering us a kind smile that reminds me of Stella's. "Stella! Your friends are here!"

"What?!" Stella can be heard from the kitchen, and I can discern panic in her voice. "But I'm not done yet!"

Yeji sighs and shakes her head before offering us an apologetic smile. "She's in the kitchen, baking some goods for all of you. You may lounge in the living room first. I'll help her."

"It's fine. I'll help her." I tell her with a small smile, and I don't miss the way her eyes gleam with suspicion.

"Sure." Yeji proceeds to guide the guys to the living room, with Jungwon rambling away by her side.

I make my way to the kitchen, and when I arrive, I am greeted by the sight of cookies and cupcakes on platters. My breath catches in my throat as I look at her, who appears to be focused on frosting the last cupcake. God, she looks truly beautiful. Her hair is tied up in a messy bun with a few strands of hair covering her side frames, and she is wearing a white long-sleeved crop top with grey sweatpants hanging low on her perfect waistline.

"Yeji, I'm almost done─" As she looks up, her eyes meet mine, and they widen in surprise. "Heeseung."

I offer her a smile as I approach her. "Hey, sweetheart. I didn't know you could bake."

Her rosy cheeks tempt me to kiss them. "I'm sorry you had to witness this mess."

"A beautiful mess, at that." I smirk before I point at her lips. "You got a little something on your lips."

She touches her lips, confused. "Huh? Is it the frosting?"

I don't answer, and instead, I swiftly wrap my arm around her waist before leaning down to kiss her squarely on the lips.

"Heeseung!" She squeals into the kiss, but I smile instead, kissing her a little longer before pulling away.

I slowly lick my bottom lip, smirking at how flushed she looks. "Yummy."

"Stella! It isn't polite to keep your guests waiting!" Yeji's loud voice can be heard from the outside.

Stella looks at me apologetically. "Heeseung, can you─"

I plant a kiss on her crown. "Of course, I'll help."

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

Stella and I fooled around in the kitchen for a short while, with me giving her back hugs and pecking her irresistible rosy cheeks, before I helped her bring out the platters. Fortunately, the guys didn't seem to have any suspicions about us, but Yeji seemed to have a hunch, judging by the way her eyes narrowed at us, but she became distracted when the guys asked about Stella's childhood.

While the rest are busy listening to Yeji as she tells a tale about Stella's childhood with a teasing grin on her face, I spot Stella, who is seated on the single couch across from me with one leg over the other and her hands occupied with a cupcake.

Stella has been trying to prevent Yeji from telling all of us about her embarrassing moment, but she fails. And so, with her eyebrows furrowing, she proceeds to munch on the cupcake while her lips form into a frown.

I stifle a chuckle while a smirk threatens to form on my lips as my gaze on her never leaves. Right now, Stella looks like a chipmunk, aggressively munching away.

"Don't be mad, baby sis." Yeji teases her again as soon as she finishes. "They're your friends, and any friend of yours should know what you were like in your adolescent days."

Stella grabs a tissue on the table before wiping her mouth, and a scoff leaves her lips right after. "Right. You also forgot to mention how I wasn't allowed to be a normal child whenever mother and father were around." She chuckles dryly while bitterness is written across her features.

The air in the living room shifts uncomfortably with a certain frigidity. I exchange glances with my best friends, and as I look at Yeji, she appears guilty and saddened.

"Sorry." Stella sighs, relaxing her tensed shoulders. "I brought the mood down. My bad."

"I'm the one who should be sorry." Yeji tells Stella in a softer tone. "I got so over my head that I've forgotten you had a bad childhood because of our parents." Then, Yeji glances at us warily before looking back at Stella. "Do they know─"

"Yes." Stella interjects. "I trust them. Besides, I was with them the other night when father punished me. I even showed them my scars."

Yeji draws in a sharp breath as she closes her eyes, seeming to calm herself down after hearing Stella's last statement. "Stella, I'm this close to bringing you with me and living in New York."

"I told you that as much as I want to, I can't." Stella emphasises, her eyes turning crestfallen.

"Wait, you had thoughts about moving abroad?" Jungwon asks with a frown.

Stella bites her lips and looks down at her hands. "I had, but I can't due to my reasons." She looks up with a faint smile on her face. "Plus, how could I ever leave you all behind?"

The atmosphere in the air feels delicate and intimate at the same time, with her kind yet beautiful eyes on us and the way my heart flutters because of her. From my peripheral vision, I manage to catch Yeji looking at us with suspicion before she clears her throat loudly, enough to pull us back to reality.

"It looks like I'm going to be late for an important event." Yeji glances down at her wristwatch before she grabs her purse at the side and rises from her seat. She offers us a kind smile. "It's nice meeting you. I hope your friendship with Stella lasts a long time."

With a pout on Stella's kissable lips, she makes her way to Yeji before engulfing her in a hug. "I can't believe you're going out again." I can hear Stella whining even though she tries to keep it discreet, prompting me to chuckle at how adorable she can be.

Yeji pats her back before pulling away from the hug and placing her hands on Stella's shoulders. "At least you'll have your friends to keep you company." I catch a knowing glint in Yeji's eyes. "Plus, I'm also here for both family and business. Unfortunately for you, duty calls."

Not too long later, Yeji has already left, leaving Stella to entertain us as she returns to the living room.

"So," Stella stands in our line of sight with her hands clasped together, and an awkward smile graces her pink lips. "What do you guys want to do?"

"What do you have in mind?" Sunghoon asks, quirking an eyebrow at her, but my eyes narrow at his smirking lips. For as long as I know Sunghoon, I know for a fact that there is suggestiveness hinted in his question. Damn bastard.

Stella purses her lips as she appears to be in deep thought, bringing some chuckles from us at how adorable she looks. She snaps out of her thoughts and looks at us with a sly grin. "Something fun." She takes steps back slowly. "I'm sure all of you will love it. Be right back."

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

The idea Stella had in mind wasn't what any of us expected.

"Why are we doing this again?" Sunghoon's voice is tinged with irritation, followed by a grumble. "This is meant for girls!"

"Because it's fun!" Stella exclaims, her eyes forming the shape of a crescent, with chuckles leaving her lips.

"Yeah, it's fun!" Sunoo chimes, earning him some glares from some of the guys.

It turns out, Stella brought down a mini-box full of manicures, including nail polishings. She decided that black polish would suit all of us. Unlike the rest of us, Sunoo and Ni-Ki voluntarily offered to polish our nails, as they had no issues with nail polishing.

Presently, Sunoo is attending to Jake, whereas Ni-Ki is attending to Jungwon. Stella has already polished Jay's nails, to which the latter doesn't seem too satisfied, nor does he complain much, unlike Sunghoon. On the other hand, I am waiting patiently for my turn.

"My nails." Sunghoon whimpers, staring down at his nails that are already polished in black, while Stella rolls her eyes at Sunghoon's dramatic ass, but nonetheless, she takes great pleasure in Sunghoon's reaction. "Princess, what have you done?"

"I made your nails prettier!" Stella chirps with a grin, earning her a scowl from Sunghoon. "Trust me, you'll love it!"

"Are these permanent?" Jake asks, the mortification written on his face brings laughter out of Stella. "Love, I don't want to be seen with my nails polished on campus tomorrow."

"What if I tell you they are?" Stella's whimsical remark elicits dramatic gasps from Jake, Jay, Jungwon, and Sunghoon. "I'm just joking. You may remove them only after you get home." Finally, she's done with Sunghoon's nails and rises from the ground before her eyes settle on mine.

I have been staying quiet, just observing the rest and being amused by the sight. I don't feel too keen on Stella's idea, but if that's what makes her happy, then the least I can do is not complain and allow her to do what she wants to my nails.

"You don't seem to complain." Stella tells me with a light chuckle as she settles herself to sit in front of me. She doesn't hesitate to grab my hand and place it on top of her thigh. "At least I won't have to hear you whine and grumble annoyingly, unlike Park Sunghoon and Sim Jaeyun."

"We heard that!" Both Sunghoon and Jaeyun exclaim simultaneously, but she merely ignores them.

"I'd let you do anything to me." I say softly as I watch her polish my first nail carefully yet expertly.

She pauses briefly and glances up to meet my eyes. Her rosy cheeks deepen their colour before she clears her throat and resumes polishing my nails. "So, where is Aera?" She asks. "She would've loved to join me polishing your nails."

"She wanted to follow, but her assignments are due tonight." I inform. "She has a habit of completing her assignments in the last few minutes."

Stella hums in acknowledgment as she proceeds to grab my other hand. "Your nails are already pretty, Hee." She compliments me, her soft tone is enough to melt my heart.

"Thank you, sweetheart." I chuckle lightly, and the next thing I know, she is done, allowing me to examine them. "You know, I think I look great in these nail polishes."

"You are." Stella agrees, though she appears to be flushed with the way her eyes seem to scan my countenance. "The black polish complements the way you look."

I know what she meant. The black nail polish matches with my outfit which consist of black pants and tee with black leather jacket completing the whole look.

This time, my smile transitions into a smirk as I lean a little closer to her. "Yeah? Do I look like your pretty boy now?"

Stella takes me by surprise when she boops my nose with a chuckle. "Yes, you are."

"Stella! I need your help!" Sunoo's intervention causes me to sigh as Stella leaves me.

"You look good with them, bro." Jay compliments me, making me feel taken aback.

"I look ridiculous." Sunghoon remarks loudly, as if he wants Stella to hear who is busily polishing Sunoo's nails.

"Yeah, you do!" Jake grins boyishly at a scowling Sunghoon. "Hey! At least you look ridiculous with me!"

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

"You guys look so pretty with your nails." Stella coos, a simper smile graces her lips as she looks pleased with our overall look. "See? I told you that you would look good, but you doubted me."

Some of the guys are getting ready to head back while the others will be going for a night ride. They even invited Stella to join them, but Stella wasn't in the mood to go for a ride. In fact, throughout the day we spent time together, she looked slightly distraught but masked it with her smiles and laughters. Or maybe I'm just imagining things.

"I've never once doubted you." Ni-Ki brings Stella into a side hug, blatantly displaying his affection for her when he kisses her crown.

"Same." Sunoo chuckles. "We're your pretty boys, right, darling?" Stella blushes and looks away from Sunoo, but she seems to agree as she doesn't give a reply.

"They're starting to grow on me." Jay says as he examines his nails

"I can't wait to remove them." Sunghoon gives Stella a delightful grin, to which the latter rolls her eyes. "Keep rolling your eyes and you'll lose them one day, princess."

"We better get going." Jungwon announces before he turns to look at Stella with a soft gaze. "I'll see you tomorrow, Bubs." He embraces Stella, hugging her for a little longer.

With each of the guys waiting for their turns to bid goodbyes, I stand just a few metres from them as I lean sideways against the wall with my arms crossed, silently watching them. Some of the guys don't hesitate to give her kisses on her forehead and crown.

I scoff lightly. It is as if they aren't going to see Stella for long when they'll be seeing her tomorrow again with how clingy and desperate they seem, unable to let her go. Soon, they step out of the mansion, leaving Stella and I alone.

"Heeseung, you're still here." Her face contorts into confusion as she walks towards me. "Why are you not joining them?"

"I want to keep you company for awhile." I raise my eyebrow at her. "Do you not enjoy my company?"

"I do." She answers quickly. "Actually, thanks. I do need some company." She sighs, placing her hand at her forehead. "I can't stop thinking about something. I've actually been distraught, but I didn't want to show it to all of you and spoil the mood."

"I know." I lean away from the wall. "I noticed how you looked a little out of it. Care to tell me what is troubling my girl?"

Stella looks at me, seeming to be contemplating. "Not here. Let's go to my room." She grabs my hand without a second thought and proceeds to drag me with her.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

Her room is just what I expected. It matches her aesthetic. The size of her room is equivalent to a living room. The queen-sized bed is pushed up against the wall, facing the window. Bookshelves painted black with stacks of books and other decorative items. Just beside her nightstand, there is a mini-fridge and a walk-in closet room. The ajar door of her bathroom allows me to catch a glimpse of a bathtub.

Still holding my hand, she brings me to the centre of the room, where there is a mini couch that fits two people and a small coffee table. On the table, I spot a brown file with the word 'confidential' stamped.

As I take a seat, I watch with a frown as she paces back and forth with her bottom lip tucked between her teeth. "Talk to me, sweetheart."

Stella lets out a sigh as she stops pacing. "Earlier, Yeji and I went into our father's office. Yeji told me she found something that was rather unsettling and that it concerns me." She grabs the file and hands it to me, which I grab and proceed to flip open.

My frown deepens as I examine the documents. What makes me even curiouser is a document that states a DNA test result. I look up at her. "Is this all yours?"

"Yes. But the thing is, there must be other missing documents because it doesn't add up!" Stella's frustration is apparent as she sits on her bed, facing me. "At first, I thought I was adopted, but my mother was pregnant with me when she had the DNA tested."

I close the file and put it back down before I slowly approach her. "And?"

Stella's eyes turn crestfallen. "And I don't know, but mostly I'm afraid of the possibility that there is an ugly truth behind my birth."

I sit next to her, and my heart aches at how she looks dejected. I don't hesitate to grab her hand, holding it close to my chest while my action prompts her to look at me. "Whatever it is, I'll be there with you every step of the way." I place a kiss on her knuckles, a gesture I often find myself doing to her. My eyes soften. "Thank you for trusting me enough to let me know your troubles and concerns."

Stella's eyes soften as well before she goes in for a hug, and I gladly welcome her. Soon, we find ourselves settling comfortably on her bed with my back resting against the headboard and my arm around her body, while Stella has her arm wrapped around me with her head resting on my chest. We bask in the silence, and I swear I can hear the sound of my heart beating.

I allow her to play with my fingers, twiddling them mindlessly on my chest. "You really look good with black nails, Hee." She breaks the silence, murmuring.

"That's because the pretty lady herself polished them." I say softly, unable to resist myself from giving her forehead a kiss, prompting her to look up at me.

She stops twiddling with my fingers. Her eyes flicker at my lips. "Kiss me?"

I gladly do so, dipping my head down to kiss her softly with one hand cradling her face. This kiss feels different compared to our last one. This feels delicate and sweet, tingling with yearning.

We pull away, stopping for a few inches as we flutter our eyes open. She cracks into a grin while the softness of her gaze persists. "You're pretty, Hee."

"I'd rather be called handsome, but if my sweetheart insists that I'm pretty, who am I to deny?" I drawl lazily, smirking at her flushed reaction. Before I know it, our lips reconnect.

I don't know how long we spend kissing each other lazily, cuddling on her bed, and even talking about random stuff in a soft tone, with her occasionally twiddling either my fingers or my necklace, but long enough to hear Yeji's voice and footsteps approaching from the outside.

"Stella! Are you asleep?"

Stella pauses from twiddling my necklace before she looks up at me with wide eyes, but I remain collected and shake my head at her.

"No?" Stella answers Yeji unsurely. "Don't come inside!"

There is a protracted silence before Yeji speaks again. "Just don't stay up too late."

"I should head back." I say after Yeji walks away with her footsteps sounding faint. But I still have her in my arms, unable to let her go. "But I don't have the heart to leave you."

"Then don't." She snuggles into my chest before resting her head in the nook of my neck. "Stay here with me."

I chuckle breathily as I fully wrap my arms around her figure and rest my chin on her head. "As you wish, sweetheart."

Moments like this, I wish they would last. I wish for a lot of things, including living a peaceful life with Stella in it.

As I hold her close to me, I flutter my eyes closed, pained at the prospect of her learning the truth about some of us.

PREV CHAP | NEXT CHAP

#enhypen #enhypen poly #enhypen x oc #enhypen fanfic

[fizzybeakon]

agent 3 agent 4 agent 8 new agent 3

a knife a spoon a fork a spork

Seafoam/agent 3

she's very not herself anymore, used to be plucky but now she doesn't even play turf wars anymore, she feels like her life has spiraled so far out of control and there isn't anything left yet she wakes up everyday she always wonders what's keeping her in this continuous line cycle of wake up - day to day life/things that need doing - go to sleep - repeat. she's not angry but has a bad temper usually because she wishes her life hadn't take the turns it did if she could go back in time and stop it she would like to just be the kid she was playing turf wars with her old teammates even if that meant giving up the people she knows today (she wouldn't say that to her friends especially 8 whom she values most next to the squid sisters, she would tell Callie this only) 4 reminds her of herself before that's why she quote unquote doesn't like her. Will cut you as a warning - KNIFE

Pranha/Agent 4

very lazy only really able to get up and do anything if her life depends on it or she's dragged/forced into the situation. 0 motivation to do anything except complain and have bad takes (bad takes are just generally dangerous things to get out of doing work nothing super bad) she represents whats carefree and unapologetic. loves turfing its fun but she just can't bring herself to as much these days it has to be the right faze of the moon you dig? "ask questions later we don't need to know the details" fully believes Marie was trying to kill her and Callie wasn't missing until she saw it with her own eyes. Has a really mom - child relationship with Marie even if she says she doesn't will go as far to say she doesn't like Marie but she depends on her a lot and she's like the first person she'll run to when something goes wrong. Spends a lot of time with Pearl they get along because they are menaces to society. Likes spending time with Sushi and showing her cool stuff inklings do. Interacting with 3 is hard because she shoots her down all the time and seems to not want to interact with her but she forces her way in sometimes it's good sometimes it's bad. Will run before being forced to fight her way out cause it's easier and less effort is required - SPOON

Sushi/Agent 8

Can do attitude! she's always willing to work with you go out of her way to help you in anyway she can. Can't leave well enough alone in the best way. Doesn't have time for turfs due to all the things shes planned for herself helping out all the remaining octolings in the metro giving them clothes food and other supplies yet she's the only one who actually joins turfs the most next to new 3. Extremely fascinated with chirpy chips to the point she started dressing like her, that's her favorite musician. Regularly associates with off the hook tries to never not talk to all her friends at least once a day. Checks up on 3 tries to be the coaxing her back into a new life or a the old life. They have a connection and 8 cares for her deeply and wants to pull her from the hole she's put herself in. Very much a busy body, a twin to her brother who was cut from the same tentacle, colorful reminders and lots of sticky notes. Becomes fast friends with deadfish? you get one chance thats it you lose that your getting stabbed - FORK

Salmonie/New agent 3

the most normal out of everyone. I just got here energy. homeless energy using turf wars as a income so she doesn't really have a choice if she wants to do it not. regularly associates with squid sisters and deep cut mostly just Shiver she's kinda scared of Frey and Big man. doesn't really interact with the other agents or come around them she's out living her life with her friends not to say they aren't her friends she just views them more as workmates and never asked for all this craziness, saving the world giant bears and such. Keeps that part of her life a hush hush cause she thinks other kids will think shes weird or down right wont believe her if she did say it. She honestly thinks 3 is too mysterious and needs to tone it down but doesn't have the guts to say it to her face the closest she'll get it "she needs to take a chill pill" she can vibe with off the hook but never heard of them never met them before she heard they were all the rage back when. If you don't stop im cutting you, several chances were given - SPORK

hope that clears it all up for you guys on their personalities

#pranha #salmonie #seafoam #sushi #splatoon #splatoon 2 #splatoon 3 #new agent 3 #agent 3 #agent 4 #agent 8

[thesmurfchick]

Who tf is Kaito Shinonome (Part 7)

My interpretations/headcanons:

Some of these might not be so much headcanons but things implied by the game, but I’m putting them here in case I may be misinterpreting him. Feel free to let me know your thoughts!

Also this somehow turned into less my headcanons and more me trying to psychoanalyze him lol. Please take everything with a grain of salt.

Has a strong desire to feel useful/needed

This is most clearly shown through his insistence on protecting Miu and providing for her/taking care of her every need and want (which may also be due to him taking on the role of her parent)

BUT it’s also shown through dialogue choices that raise his affinity, and his interactions with the other characters

For example, he appreciates being told he’s a good brother/he’s working hard

Maybe it helps assuage the guilt he feels over the Incident

He might also just appreciate the validation for his effort

Takuma can stop him from going off to look for Miu on his own by saying that everyone needs him

His knowledge of foraging and the woods despite only having lived by one for ~1 year(?)

Maybe the countryside is boring and there’s nothing else for him to do, or maybe he’s practical and figures it could come in handy someday

Dracmon acting tough in Part 6 to hide his sadness might reflect this; he doesn’t want to seem down because he’s trying to be the reliable one

Was often misunderstood/misinterpreted by the people around him

So it’s canon that Kaito is kinder than he lets on, he just has a rough way of going about it

I don’t think it’s a stretch to say that some people are probably put-off by him because of that (especially in Japan’s more conservative society)

As for whether I think it bothered him… probably yes and no?

There must have been moments when he was bothered that people didn’t understand him/assumed the worst of him, though instead of being ashamed of himself, he’s seems the type to become more brazen about who he is as a result

Given how (positively) surprised he gets when Takuma doesn’t get intimidated by him or offended/upset by some of his meaner comments, it’s possible he’s used to people being intimidated, getting on their bad side, or maybe even being labeled as a “delinquent” or “problem child”

(Or maybe he just values honesty and earnestness in people? Or he’s never met someone as earnest or as genuinely caring as Takuma is)

In Part 6, he mentions he’s “not used to being on good terms,” which could mean a lot of things…

This could also have meant he didn’t have many friends (or, at least, not many close friends), but there’s not enough in the game that makes me feel particularly one way or the other about this, so it’s up in the air

BUT he says in the Harmony route that Miu was the only reason why he “put up” with the group

While I think he was just grieving and didn’t want to be around them, this decision to reject people he’d previously shown to like and care for could be because he’s not used to being accepted

It could also be due to him just being very independent and falling back to “handling it himself” like he always has

He doesn’t have a missing item in the waterways because the only thing tying him to the real world is Miu

Idk, it’s very noticeable that Shuuji and Kaito are the only ones you don’t encounter in the waterways with an “important item from the other world”

Like, that was on purpose (or maybe not, maybe I’m just overanalyzing)

I mean, Shuuji was a little preoccupied having a breakdown (and also, he might not have had anything tying him to the real world), so that’s why he didn’t have one, but what’s Kaito’s excuse??

All the items seem to symbolize things that tie them to the world in a positive way, which he might not have because…

He felt a general sense of dissatisfaction with the world, which was worsened by the Incident

Any “clues” I have for this are more peripheral:

His bold personality and aesthetic choice in a conservative society, which could reflect a certain mentality and/or personality type that might not mesh well with other people

Possibly neglectful parents, which similarly led to him not feeling accepted or like he “belongs” anywhere

His sense of justice, which makes him upset whenever he sees examples of injustice in the world

I don’t think he was depressed or hopeless or anything like that

Just a general idea of “this world kinda sucks” that he lived with

If we’re approaching real hc territory here -- maybe he even felt constrained by Japan’s rather conservative society

But after something like the Incident hit so close to home (and it wasn’t even targeted towards him, but his kid sister), he went from “this world kinda sucks” to “this world sucks!!”

This could also reflect/foreshadow his willingness to destroy both worlds during the Harmony Route

After he loses Miu, there’s nothing tying him to the real world anymore

I think this can also manifest in him not being very materialistic in general

(Correct me if I’m wrong but) Not once does he or Miu ever bring up anything that he likes, or even things he used to like, which makes me think he probably didn’t have many things like that

Protecting Miu gives him a sense of purpose/fulfillment stronger than anything he had before -- which is why he’s so bad at giving it up

I see Kaito as a very “driven” person (aka, needs some kind of purpose in his life)

This ties into what I said about him possibly having a desire to be useful

Can also tie into his strong sense of justice

To start, I don’t think it’s much of a headcanon to say that protecting Miu is his purpose

It’s best exemplified in the Harmony route, when he’s so lost after losing Miu until Haru gives him the new purpose of revenge against the Master

And then he becomes single-mindedly focused on revenge (the same way he was single-mindedly focused on protecting Miu)

Then when the group snaps him out of that, he feels a little lost/empty after his revenge plan falls through until they tell him to “protect”

There’s no concrete evidence (that I know of) about his possible “purpose in life” before the Incident

But whatever it was (whether it was driven by his sense of justice, or something else he was passionate about, or whether he had a purpose at all), it wasn’t anything like his purpose to protect Miu

Kaito mentions in Part 4 that Miu is the type to get “really into” something she likes

I think Kaito is similar -- but rather than just kinda having fun with it (like she does with the amusement park), he likes things that encourage him to take action, and sometimes he can take it too far

After adopting “protect Miu” as his purpose, I think he found it to combine a lot of the things he’d previously valued:

Justice = he’s protecting someone weaker than him

Responsibility = he’s doing his duty as an older brother; also making up for his “failure”

Family = he’s protecting his sister

Being needed = she needs his protection (or so he believes)

And so he got way too into it and found it hard to calm down

That being said, I don’t necessarily think this purpose makes him happy (he seems more desperate than anything)

But it’s a purpose that keeps him going, and by now, it’s become so strong it ended up taking up most of his identity

He probably doesn’t even know who he is outside of his role as “big brother”

Check out the other parts here: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8

#digimon survive #kaito shinonome

[childe-the-harbinger]

・❥・500 years ago...

╰┈➤ Synopsis-- You ask the archons (Venti, Zhongli, Ei, Nahdia) about khaenri'ah and what they were doing during the cataclysm ..

╰┈➤ Please read !!! For Nahdia's, since we don't know her backstory, I just wrote my own prediction. Its not a leak. Also, if I get any lore incorrect in this, I sincerely apologize.

╰┈➤ Angst gn! reader.

╰┈➤ Venti was very surprised to even hear that you knew about the nation, especially since almost none of the history books in Mondstadt mention the event, let alone that the archons were involved. You knew him on a personal level, so you needed answers.

╰┈➤ At first, he just plays it off as a story in one of his songs.

╰┈➤ "Ehe, as a bard, my stories must really be convincing! It's definitely an honor to hear someone was actually interested in hearing more!"

╰┈➤ You made sure you were in a secluded area with the anemo archon and you started interrogating him. Why did Celestia decide to do what they did? What did he do?

╰┈➤ "Khaenriah was a very advanced civilization. It was located near Mondstadt, where my people lived in peace. I was afraid of the war spreading, similar to how the archon war had its own consequences in each nation. I had to protect my people.. It's my job as an archon. If I didn't, needless to say that Celestia would be pretty upset with me..." He ended that with a classic giggle to brighten the mood a little.

╰┈➤ You weren't an archon, not even a god of anything, but you understood. It seemed he didn't really have a choice and he had regrets. We all make mistakes.. Right?

╰┈➤ You and Zhongli were on an outing, drinking tea on a mountain top. Just the two of you, when a question came to your mind. Khaenriah. You go ahead and shoot you shot. You ask the big question.. What happened in Khaenri'ah?

╰┈➤ He let out a big, upset sigh. You knew it was bad news, not only from the sigh, but his body language, too. He tensed his shoulders, furrowed his brow, and put a hand on his chin. Perhaps he was just trying to remember? He is the oldest archon after all, he must have a cluttered memory bank.

╰┈➤ After what seemed like forever, he denied answering your question, though you could tell it was eating him up inside. Not that he wanted to tell people, but that there was a more serious aspect to his involvement.

╰┈➤ "...I apologize, but I cannot say. As the god of contracts, it would be quite a bad look to break a contract I signed with my own hand." You suspected as much. Perhaps he regretted signing the contract, maybe not. We may not ever know.

╰┈➤ Raiden Ei wasn't in Khaenri'ah.. That was until her sister, Makoto, went there without her knowing. When she caught wind of it, she departed.

╰┈➤ She wasn't really thrilled when you first mentioned wanting to know about Khaenri'ah, but she knew she had to tell you sooner or later.

╰┈➤ "Khaenri'ah... Was an injustice. The people lost their entire nation due to the heavenly principals. I didn't want to involve myself.. But, when Makoto left, I knew I had to fight for her. But.. Once I arrived, she had passed."

╰┈➤ After that happened in Khaenri'ah, Ei created her puppet, which just ended in her giving up the gnosis to Yae Miko, her familiar.

╰┈➤ She doesn't associate with either Khaenri'ah (in fear of getting in trouble with higherups and the abyss) but also doesn't associate with the gods, in fear or getting too close to another and having them pass away.

╰┈➤ Nahdia would purposefully keep the people of Sumeru away from the truth of the cataclysm, in fear they'd find out about the past Dendro Archon.

╰┈➤ Once you asked about it to her, she started with the past Dendro Archon, the God of the woods.

╰┈➤ "The previous Dendro Archon, the greater lord... Was my mother. She got roped into the war because of her knowledge of their weapons and how to manipulate them. I was so young at the time.. I couldn't leave my mother."

╰┈➤ Her eyes were looking down, her hair covering most of her face. " My mother used to read to me stories of fairies in the rainforests of Sumeru. She'd say once a child gets old enough, they fly off into the forests to thrive. It was my favorite story; she read it to me every night."

╰┈➤ "Once she had passed... Her power as an archon got passed down to me, since I was her next to kin. I was in disbelief.. I didn't want to grow up without my mother baring witness to it. The Anemo Archon had told me how he had taken the appearance of his friend when he attained his god-like powers.. I was somewhat inspired. I decided to freeze my appearance from aging so I wouldn't have to live, changing, without my mom seeing me grow."

╰┈➤ She was obviously upset. It seems she hasn't gotten over what had happened in the nation 500 years ago. You suppose what she said explains her child-like appearance, but you couldn't help feeling bad now every time you saw her.

#genshin #genshin impact #genshin fluff #genshin impact x reader #genshin x reader #ei #raiden shogun #venti #barbatos #beelzebub #angst #genshin angst #zhongli #morax #kusanali #lesser lord kusanali #nahdia #sad #no comfort #suffer #i am so sorry.