#and the only thing you can do is

[enlighten3d]

that familiar feeling of being so close to the end of something you really love and not wanting to continue because that means that it will end but you keep going because you love this thing so much and you want to see it through to the end.

#me rn #im on chapter 500 of #orv #and its so- #i dont even know how to describe it #because i dont want to keep going; i dont want this wonderful story to end #but i have to because i need to see it through to the end; i need to keep reading and find out #its so bittersweet i suppose #i felt the same way when i was listening to #tma #and im sure ive felt it before with other things #this feeling is just. the best and worst thing ever. #exhilaration of having made it THIS far #but knowing that this wonderful story is about to draw to a close #and the only thing you can do is #keep reading #book #books #i dont even know what to tag this as #fandom #podcast #podcasts

[bisexualpercyjacksons]

pjo tv show episode 5 alignment:

#percy and annabeth mighttttt be switched but grover as gaslight is undeniable #grover lying through his teeth captivated me I was like sweetie WHAT are you doing #annabeth said either help me or leave to a GOD amongst other things which is why she deserves girlboss #percy gatekeeps everyone (but himself) from sacrificing themselves which is as always true to character #pjo tv show #pjo #pjo tv spoilers #pjo tv #percy jackon and the olympians #percy jackson #annabeth chase #grover underwood #character alignment #a god buys us cheeseburgers #like no one has posted content yet so I’m making something and going to bed #mine #gaslight gatekeep girlboss #humor #no one bully me on the image sizes I’m on my phone at midnight using photoshop without an account #which means I can only layer one photo at a time so each time I have to make it a new photo #I’m bullying myself don’t worry

[iamanartichoke]

I don't know who needs to hear this, but as a creator -

I am fine with "the audience" -

downloading my fics

printing my fics

copy/pasting or screenshotting my fics

sharing your saved copy of my fics with anyone else who might want them in the unlikely but never impossible case that my fics are no longer available on ao3

making a book of my fic(s) and running your fingers across the pages while lovingly whispering my precioussss

doing these things with anything I create for fandom, such as meta, headcanons, au nonsense like 'texts from the brodinsons,' etc

I am not fine with "the audience"

doing any of the above with the purpose/intent of plagiarizing my work or passing it off as their own in any capacity

feeding my work into ai for any reason whatsoever

Save the fandom things. Preserve the fandom things. Respect the fandom things.

Enjoy the fandom things.

#fanfic #ao3 #archive of our own #fandom things #tumblr things #i may have said this at some point #i'm sure i have #but whatever - just in case #i don't say this with the presumption that i'm so amazing and people are clamoring to save my fics #but just if anyone is so inclined that's all #ftr i don't intend on ever removing my fics from ao3 or deleting fandom things from this blog #i've always shared my fandom things with the intent of keeping them shared bc that's the whole point of posting #but the fandom atmosphere and ao3 constantly being under attack who knows what can happen #not that this applies to anyone but should all else fail you can also reach out to me and i will personally give you a copy #at least of fics bc i save everything #not so much the tumblr things but this is a good reminder to myself that i should do that for the things i care about #that i've made or done and only posted here #anyway sorry i have now used up my quota of the putting words into sentences doing for today #i have plans to stare into the void now

[andthebeanstalk]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need. #the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist. #the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28! #a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents. #they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong. #and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives. #you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead? #or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of. #no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow. #i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong. #just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

[langernameohnebedeutung]

ngl, I'm beginning to take issue with how in conversations about anti-intellectualism almost automatically, the face of girls and women will be slapped on the problem.

#'all those tiktok girls who only like marvel films and' - why do you always say girls and women? are the guys filling opera halls instead? #'women in their mid 20s who still only read YA novels' okay sure that's an example and relevant discussions can be had #but it reminds me of the mocking tone in which people speak of 'chick-lit' to use women's interest as an indicator of lower value #while in fact women are reading more than men in EVERY single genre of fiction. Women are doing a lot of (often unpaid) labour #supporting libaries supporting theatres supporting cultural events #meanwhile there is a pretty big overlap between toxic masculinity and anti-intellectualism #(especially misogyny and homophobia) #especially when it comes to things like ballet or opera or musical or generally dance #in fact it is often the female investment in specific things that makes them less 'valuable' in general consciousness #for thousands of years the theatre was well-respected and a high form of art - and now it's a 'wife-thing' #the father who will teach his son that theatre and dance are for girls - how is that never an example for anti-intellectualism

[knifearo]

being aromantic is like. hey btw you're going to live a life that is the culmination of most of society's worst nightmares. sorry lol ✌️ but then you turn around and take a really good hard look at it and it turns out that living in that nightmare is fucking awesome and you get to wake up every day and take that fear that other people have and laugh and hold it close until it's a great joy for you instead. and being happy is a radical act that you define instead of someone else. and you're sexy as fuck that's just a fact of life i don't make the rules on that one

#aromantic people are just sexy i'm not making the decisions here it's just facts #course ur hot as fuck. it came free with the aromanticism #being sexy is just default settings for aromantic people 👍 #hope this all helps. anyway i'm on my 'i hope i die alone <3 i can't wait to die alone <3' kick rn #i think the existential fear that people have of Not Partnering specifically is so. well. #obviously that shit is strong and it is SO awesome to be free of it. #realizing you're aro and you don't Want a partner can be such a hit to the solar plexus #cause society says that's the only thing that'll make you happy. so either you go without that thing or you force yourself #into doing something you don't want which would make you unhappy anyway. #so you think it's a lose lose situation and you have to come to terms with what amatonormativity presents as the worst possible situation #but then! whoa! turns out personhood is inherently valuable in and of itself and romantic partnering is just a construct! #and that nightmare is now your life to do with as you please... define as you will... structure as you want... #best case scenario. is what i'm saying. #every day i wake up ready to spit all that amatonormative rhetoric back in life's teeth by being alone and being happy #and it's so fucking satisfying. every day. #fucking JUBILANT being by myself. and i love being a living breathing 'fuck you' to the romantic system #you need a partner to be happy? oh that's sooo fucking crazy guess i'll go be miserable then. in my perfect fucking dream life lmao #yeah obviously it's the worst possible outcome on earth to die without a partner. so terrible. can't wait for it :) #aromantic #aromanticism #aro positivity #aroace #arospec #sorry to bitches who are sad about not having a partner. i could not give a fuck though get better soon #you couldn't EVER pay me enough to go back to a mindset in which my inherent value wasn't enough by myself. #FUCK that shit. absolutely miserable and a bad life outlook in general. like genuinely do the work w/ amatonormativity and get better #life is something that can be so fulfilling whether someone wants to kiss you or whatever or not #i'm on antidepressants and i have people i care deeply about. what the fuck would i need a partner for lmao

[unashamedly-enthusiastic]

Tried to tip a tumblr blog at 1am and it was such a suspicious transaction it immediately put a full fraud freeze on my account

Fortunately, banks no longer just ask 'did you make that transaction' they want to make sure you weren't scammed into making that transaction and 5mins after their call will give away all your money anyway.

This is an honest to goodness life saving movement and I cannot be happier banks are adopting it

Unfortunately, it meant I had to have the most embarrassing financial call of my life

-

Me: Ah yeah I was just trying to tip a tumblr blog

Cash: right and were you directed there by a Facebook link? An Instagram advert?

Me: no I was just on tumblr...on purpose

-

Caah: and this person asked you for money?

Me: oh no they just had a funny story, which happened to be about money and I thought, "wouldn't it be funny if I tipped them"

-

Me: * covering a reblog by reblog update on the adventures my mutual was having *

Cash: okay I don't think that can actually happen though..

Me: It might not have, but i was happy to tip them just because it was funny

-

Cash: and how well do you think you know this person?

Me: *considers explaining how much I know about a beloved mutual without ever knowing their name or face* ... I have no idea who this person is

I think in the end Cash decided there was no saving me from myself

#Chase unblocked my card #But I did not come off well #But this is a good thing! #Be fraud aware! #Tipping a blog should be like handing money to someone in the street #Only do it if you can afford it and WANT TO and do not care what it goes on #It COULD be a scam #You've got to be alright with that #YOU DO NOT KNOW THESE PEOPLE #THE VET BILL ASKS ARE A SCAM #scams

[andsewingishalfthebattle]

Novice sewing pattern: Cut out shapes. Line up the little triangles on the edges. Stitch edges together. We've also included step-by-step assembly instructions with illustrations.

Novice knitting pattern: yOU MUSt uNDerstANd thE SECret cOdE CO67 (73, 87, 93) BO44 (63, 76, 90) 28 (32, 34) slip first pw repeat 7x K to end *kl (pl) 42 * until 13" (13, 13, 15) join new at 30 pl for 17 rows ssk 27 k2tog mattress lengthwise BO and sacrifice a goat to the knitting gods. WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU WANT "INSTRUCTIONS," I JUST GAVE THEM TO YOU

#knitting #no it's not a real pattern but I can't write one that makes sense because I have no freaking clue what any of that means #How do you make things that aren't basic rectangles #Why has every knitter I've asked for help just said 'patterns are easy; you just have to know how to read them' & then refused to teach me #Where do I even find a goat to sacrifice #How do I join the pattern cult #I am so confused #I've been knitting for almost a decade but I can only make scarves and potholders #I learned one (1) stitch by watching a YouTube video and none of my friends or family knit so I have no IRL resources #And nobody I meet seems to want to take the time to explain the rest to me #I taught myself to sew through trial and error but that doesn't really work with knitting because error is pretty much just... Unraveling? #Anyway sorry for the tag rant I'm just frustrated that I see pretty things I want to make but the instructions are in an alien language #And the gap between 'absolute novice' and 'intermediate' seems to be about 20 years of experience and formal instruction

[lazylittledragon]

i refuse to believe that boycotting is hard. my favourite thing in the world is ordering maccies after a late night at work/a concert/getting drunk. yes i do miss it sometimes. but the other night i ordered from a small place near my house instead and it was the most orgasmic burger i've ever had in my life. i very rarely say this but fucking suck it up people are DEAD

#ramble #also only 0.29 delivery instead of 3.99 #and chilli cheese bites #i swear to god the best food you'll ever eat while drunk is from the tiny shithole that's open until 4am #if you're refusing to do literally the smallest thing you can do to help then i have questions #it's FOOD. you'll survive #it's not even NECESSARY food #if it was like a chain grocery place and you don't have access to anything else then i would understand #but it's just NOT #make your own coffee for the love of god #when there is NOTHING you can do to stop this fucking tragedy. and let's be honest there isn't a lot normal people can do #and people say to you 'do this insignificant thing just to show that you even CARE' #and you DON'T do that???? what is actually wrong with you #also i've been worried about this since my last post about sbucks but this is Not an attack on the people who WORK at the boycotted places #because it is an absolute privilege to be able to leave your job and immediately find a new one

[nerdpoe]

Jason agrees to go through the legal hassle of being declared alive again. Mostly so he can go to college like how he wanted.

He would have done it under a fake ID, but he kinda wanted the success of having a Masters in English attached to the name he grew up with.

It's going pretty great, actually! He's making friends, gets to punch random paparazzi's in the face, and learning has always been fun for him.

But one of his college friends, Danny Fenton, is...weirdly obsessed with Wayne Manor?

Jason gets it, he does, the Manor is huge and of course the guy would want to see it as often as he could.

Then he starts to realize that Danny is strangely attentive to Bruce.

Like, actually flirting with Bruce.

Oh no his college friend, who is his age, is flirting with Bruce so hard it's making Bruce blush.

OR; Danny thinks Bruce is hot, and that the outraged faces of the man's children as Danny flirts with him are hilarious. Also Jason started it by trying to flirt with Danny's mom when he met Danny.

#dcxdp #dpxdc #dp x dc #dc x dp #phanfic #story prompt #danny started flirting with bruce out of spite #because he wanted to show jason how uncomfortable it was #but it's turned into actual flirting #bruce is actively flustered this young man is only 20 #the best part for danny #worst part for everyone else #is when jason tells him that bruce isn't a good idea for reasons he can't say #and danny just #“oh the dressing up like a bat thing? i've seen weirder” #tertiary good thing from this though #is how ABSOLUTELY HORRIFIED VLAD IS #“daniel i know your life is your own but BRUCE WAYNE? REALLY? YOU CAN DO SO MUCH BETTER DANIEL-”

[electrozeistyking]

"She's Gone"

This bad boy was started on the third of November, and finished on the seventh. In total, there are thirty panels (all of which were drawn separately).

A good chunk of N's dialogue near the end came to me after I did some improv to figure out what he should say. I have since dubbed it "N's Failure Monologue."

#murder drones #murder drones n #murder drones tessa #murder drones uzi #tessa james elliott #serial designation n #uzi doorman #the absolutesolver #BOY let me tell ya there was some movie magic pulled in areas #even though i told myself to keep it simple... despite knowing how well that worked when i made crash test #ah well. i go overboard so you guys can enjoy the end result #and hopefully not dock off points for my inability to draw characters holding swords. i tried SO HARD #ALSO JUST SAW THE BEGINNING OF THE END TEASER THING BEFORE POSTING THIS #OH MY GOD MY HEART IS DOING THINGS TO ME AND I'M NOT SURE THIS IS HELPING #YES THAT IS THE ONLY TEASER I WILL EVER WATCH BECAUSE IT WAS UNAVOIDABLE ANYWAY (it’s in glitchx 2023) #solveruzi au #zeisty’s heavy hitters #zeisty’s comic stuff

[puppyeared]

littlest furth shop

@laikascomet

#i think i had a little too much fun with this lol #i also wanted to draw road boy and other characters but maybe when they actually get introduced #i do have a sketch of him with a lil chainsaw.. im not gonna be normal when he gets introduced man he looks so sillygoofy #if you squint laika's eye marking is a clover yue's is a crescent moon and mars' is a star ^_^ #i wanted to give laika an accessory too but i couldnt think of anything.. maybe a stack of pancakes?? #im curious to see the apocalypse side of the story too.. like so far we have an idea of the comet fucking everything up #and im assuming that lead to a ripple effect causing the apocalypse but exactly how bad?? i cant wait to find out #rn im kinda piecing stuff together.. larkspur delivers mail in a beat up van so that might mean all transportation is grounded #the buildings we've seen so far are intact like the observatory and turnip's house but idk if thats the same for big cities #laikas playlist only includes songs downloaded on yue's computer and there hasnt been internet in 20 years.. but radio signals might #still work.. if yue grows his own food we can assume that mass production and distribution also isnt a thing anymore #sorry im a sucker for worldbuilding.. and the furth puns are fun to me. i like to think toronto would be clawronto.. and vancouver wld #be nyancouver.. barktic circle.. mewfoundland and labrador.. canyada.... #christ i have so many drawing ideas. willow if youre reading this im so sorry youre probably gonna expect to see a lot of drawings frm me #like. i wanna draw laika in the akira bike pose so sosososo bad. IT WOULD BE SO AWESOMECOOL. ill teach myself to draw bikes if i have to #i also wanted to animate laika leekspin.. man #my art #myart #fanart #laika's comet #laikas comet #laika #mars #yue #furry art #fur #littlest pet shop #lps

[tevintersnakes]

Lab tech brain compels me to ramble through my OC

#fallout #arcade gannon #my art #you fools- by liking my previous art post you compelled me to do more art #anyhow I suppose that the one upside to wasteland medicine having less people involved is that there's less room for miscommunication #this is one thing on a canvas with far too many things #and the one other finished thing can sit in my drafts to post later for the illusion of me doing more art than I have haha #woe be upon y'all I can only post non-OC art when it's with an OC present it's just the law of my brain #it's a significant motivating factor I cannot sidestep around #anyway if you read these tags know that his speaking cadence is 1000 miles an hour #one of them say nothing OR flip a switch then be a chronic yapper kinds (like myself)

[evilesbiautism]

"ok but are you diagnosed" what are you a cop.

#reminder that being diagnosed as autistic/ otherwise disabled is meant to help YOU. #if abled ppl expect u to justify every little thing u say abt ur experiences as (insert disability) they should explode #also if you dont wanna get officially diagnosed bc it will make your life harder no one will judge you. if they do theyre assholes #actuallyautistic #actually autistic #autism #autistic #autism pride #adhd #actually adhd #actuallyadhd #only tagging this as adhd and autism bc its all I am. however this can be about Literally any disability

[inkskinned]

crows use tools and like to slide down snowy hills. today we saw a goose with a hurt foot who was kept safe by his flock - before taking off, they waited for him to catch up. there are colors only butterflies see. reindeer are matriarchical. cows have best friends and 4 stomachs and like jazz music. i watched a video recently of an octopus making himself a door out of a coconut shell.

i am a little soft, okay. but sometimes i can't talk either. the world is like fractal light to me, and passes through my skin in tendrils. i feel certain small things like a catapult; i skirt around the big things and somehow arrive in crisis without ever realizing i'm in pain.

in 5th grade we read The Curious Incident of the Dog In The Night-time, which is about a young autistic boy. it is how they introduced us to empathy about neurotypes, which was well-timed: around 10 years old was when i started having my life fully ruined by symptoms. people started noticing.

i wonder if birds can tell if another bird is odd. like the phrase odd duck. i have to believe that all odd ducks are still very much loved by the other normal ducks. i have to believe that, or i will cry.

i remember my 5th grade teacher holding the curious incident up, dazzled by the language written by someone who is neurotypical. my teacher said: "sometimes i want to cut open their mind to know exactly how autistics are thinking. it's just so different! they must see the world so strangely!" later, at 22, in my education classes, we were taught to say a person with autism or a person on the spectrum or neurodivergent. i actually personally kind of like person-first language - it implies the other person is trying to protect me from myself. i know they had to teach themselves that pattern of speech, is all, and it shows they're at least trying. and i was a person first, even if i wasn't good at it.

plants learn information. they must encode data somehow, but where would they store it? when you cut open a sapling, you cannot find the how they think - if they "think" at all. they learn, but do not think. i want to paint that process - i think it would be mostly purple and blue.

the book was not about me, it was about a young boy. his life was patterned into a different set of categories. he did not cry about the tag on his shirt. i remember reading it and saying to myself: i am wrong, and broken, but it isn't in this way. something else is wrong with me instead. later, in that same person-first education class, my teacher would bring up the curious incident and mention that it is now widely panned as being inaccurate and stereotypical. she frowned and said we might not know how a person with autism thinks, but it is unlikely to be expressed in that way. this book was written with the best intentions by a special-ed teacher, but there's some debate as to if somebody who was on the spectrum would be even able to write something like this.

we might not understand it, but crows and ravens have developed their own language. this is also true of whales, dolphins, and many other species. i do not know how a crow thinks, but we do know they can problem solve. (is "thinking" equal to "problem solving"? or is "thinking" data processing? data management?) i do not know how my dog thinks, either, but we "talk" all the same - i know what he is asking for, even if he only asks once.

i am not a dolphin or reindeer or a dog in the nighttime, but i am an odd duck. in the ugly duckling, she grows up and comes home and is beautiful and finds her soulmate. all that ugliness she experienced lives in downy feathers inside of her, staining everything a muted grey. she is beautiful eventually, though, so she is loved. they do not want to cut her open to see how she thinks.

a while ago i got into an argument with a classmate about that weird sia music video about autism. my classmate said she thought it was good to raise awareness. i told her they should have just hired someone else to do it. she said it's not fair to an autistic person to expect them to be able to handle that kind of a thing.

today i saw a goose, and he was limping. i want to be loved like a flock loves a wounded creature: the phrase taken under a wing. which is to say i have always known i am not normal. desperate, mewling - i want to be loved beyond words.

loved beyond thinking.

#spilled ink #writeblr #personal #please don't ask me to talk on my experience on the spectrum lol. i hate how ppl talk to me about it #i really try not to write so specifically about it #bc inevitably someone talks to me like im a child #i think this is the first time i've ever openly identified with it but i've been hinting for years #i might delete this. feels big. #the thing is that being on the spectrum actually IS a spectrum #and if u say ur autistic #inevitably someone makes an assumption about ur needs/symptoms #please do not treat me differently than u usually would. like.... we can tell when you do #and like i mention. i do appreciate the effort. i do truly appreciate the effort. #but it still feels like... #when i was blind. sometimes people kind of did the same-ish thing. #they'd find out i was blind and start talking really loudly? #and while i KNOW they're just trying to help. it would be like. i'd be trying to find #the right way into a building (sometimes only 1 door is unlocked and i couldn't see the signs posted about where to go) #and ppl would be like ''OH UR BLIND? YES SO THIS IS A DOOR. IT OPENS INTO THE BUILDING. IT IS LOCKED NOW." #''A DOOR CAN BE FOUND IN MANY LOCATIONS.'' #and it feels like. when i admit to being autistic #someone comes screeching into my life being like THIS IS A DOOR.

[lionfission]

girl help

#amphibia #amphibia fanart #sasha waybright #anne boonchuy #marcy wu #my art #eye strain #maybe?? Tagging in case #Ugggggghg it sure has been a week #sometimes you strain your back and the only thing you can do about it is make edgy Reunion fanart