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#and so i was like 'oh okay no problem' because those songs were on a pendrive
brltpop · 2 months
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Guys, girls, goths and gays please pray for me or wish me good luck because I'm about to EXPLODE
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evanpetersmybf · 3 months
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Be mine?
Tate Langdon x female!reader
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Summary: Meeting you was his destiny. He had to make you his so he could feel alive... It was meant to be.
Genre: Smut.
Word count: 3,172
Warnings: Virgin and inexperienced reader, mentions of bullying, self-harm (just once and is nothing detailed), obsessive and stalkish behavior, swearing, cunnilingus, fingering, unprotected p in v and cumshot.
A/N: English isn't my first language and this is my first time writing smut, so sorry if it sucks or if I have grammatical mistakes or something TT. Btw, also sorry if Tate's out of character. Anyways, hope you enjoy it!
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Tate had another bad day. It was the usual. Bullying, failed tests, the teacher humiliating him after he couldn’t solve a simple equation on the chalkboard, his mother scolding him. Nothing seemed new, and it seemed that nothing wasn’t going to change at any point.
He needed something, a reason to live, something to make him feel alive. Because he was dead. Dead in life, which in his own opinion, was even worse than being a rotten corpse.
He headed to the music store after secretly stealing some of his mom’s money, just a few bucks; the enough amount to buy a vinyl or some CD’s. Tate was sort of a music elitist, always believing that the artists nowadays just created pure, hollow, and trashy songs. In fact, he didn’t believe those could even be considered music.
Walking around the nearly empty store, rummaging through the shelves filled with Nirvana vinyl’s, someone bumped into him.
“Oh, sorry.” You spoke, after accidentally taking too many steps back and bumping into Tate’s behinds.
He frowned, somewhat annoyed at you for disturbing his moment of peace. The blonde turned around to look at who it was, scanning your body from head to toe, taking note of your appearance. Then, his dark eyes drifted to the sign that was on top the shelf, which indicated the musical genre of the records that were on that rack. Alternative pop. His gaze went to the album you were hugging to yourself.
“Cry Baby? What type of crap is that?”
“Huh, excuse me?”
“Never mind, you won’t understand.” Tate talked in such a volatile and rude manner, already feeling superior because of his likes.
You arched an eyebrow. What was his problem? You did nothing to him and yet he was here, judging your amazing music taste.
“Well, people’s free to like whatever they want to, hmm?”
“Uh, yeah, but what’s the point of that if everything is so generic?”
“Have you ever listened to Melanie Martinez at least once?”
He shook his head no, still scowling, now fidgeting with a ring that was on one of his fingers.
“Have you listened to Nirvana?”
“Just like… Two songs?”
“Don’t tell me. Smells Like Teen Spirit?”
“Guilty.”
Tate rolled his eyes. What was going on with this generation? What happened to good music, to the greatest artists? Why was everyone just listening to trash?
After sharing your names and a few more words, debating about who was right and who wasn’t, you placed one of your hands over his right shoulder, as an attempt to stop his rant of how superior he was. And indeed, it worked. The teen stopped venting and stared at you, all confused and a bit uncomfortable. You noticed it and quickly stepped back, apologizing for touching him without permission. He told you it was okay, that you just surprised him. But deep down, that simple yet complex touch meant a lot to Tate, even if it was absolutely nothing to you.
For the first time he felt something more than sorrow.
“So… What do you think of this? I’ll make you listen to some songs by Melanie and other artists, and I’ll listen to your beloved beautiful grunge music.” You said those last words in a mocking way.
Tate huffed, clearly offended by the way you referred to his taste. Nevertheless, in the end he agreed with you.
After paying the stuff you two picked, both of you went to Tate’s place. As you walked next to him, your fingers brushed his, making his cheeks turn a light shade of red and his heart flutter. He felt dizzy, not sure about what was going on.
In his house, he took you to his room. The boy didn’t want his mother to see you, otherwise she’d be too nosy and probably scare you and push you away from him, and that was the last thing he wanted.
“Get comfy.” He mused, extending his hand as if inviting you to take a seat wherever you feel to.
“Thanks.” You sat on the floor, using one of the sides of the bed as a support for your back. He did the same and sat right next to you.
He was nervous. So damn nervous and excited. He brought a pretty chick to his place. The Tate Langdon, the outcast, the bullied, that Tate Langdon was in the same room with a girl? He couldn’t believe it.
“Ladies first.” Tate pointed the record-player with his thumb, and you obeyed, placing the CD in it. The music started playing.
“We could’ve used Spotify, y’know?”
“Nah, I don’t like it. I prefer the old school.”
‘Cry Baby’ was the first track that was listened to.
He squinted his eyes and rubbed his chin, analyzing the sounds, the melody, the harmony and of course the lyrics.
Although it wasn’t his style, you definitely were. The way you looked, talked, walked. How you stood up for your beliefs and didn’t allow him to step on you (even if you just discussed about music). It was new for him. He craved your independence. He craved you.
That was the very moment when he realized that you were the thing he was looking for all his life. You were the one who was meant to be his, he was meant to be yours. It was destiny. Tate truly believed it was some kind of divine prophecy, and he wasn’t going to let you go.
He was so immersed in his mind that he didn’t pay attention to the song anymore. He was solely focused on you, remembering how warm and kind your touch was, how sweet your voice was. ‘Oh, she’s mine’, he thought.
“So… That was the first track. Its name’s Cry Baby. Did you like it?”
Tate snapped out of it and bit his bottom lip. He didn’t listen to your question.
“I’m sorry, what did you?—”
“Did you like the song?”
“Ah, yeah yeah. It’s quite… Innovative. I’ve never heard something like that.”
You smiled and clapped your hands. “Of course! She’s such a genius. Let’s finish the album, hm?”
He just nodded, as a little smirk appeared on his face.
The days flew by, and Tate asked you out on many friendly dates. Or at least that’s what you thought because you were so oblivious at the fact that he had a fat crush on you.
With every hang out, you noticed that Tate was lonely. Like, really lonely. Maybe that’s why he was so clingy with you.
He told you about his family, about how annoying Constance was, about his siblings and about how his father left him behind. He also mentioned the bullying he suffered and almost talked about the self-harm but stopped himself.
Both of you grew closer, as his obsession.
Since you went to a different school, he would skip class and infiltrate your campus just to see you. He couldn’t stand being away from you. And if he did, his mind was full of you, thinking of you all day, unable to focus on his homework and tests. Tate didn’t care anymore if he failed subjects, as long as you were next to him, he was happy and alive.
The void he once felt, was now fulfilled with your mere presence. You could step on him, and he would thank you. In his twisted little mind, you were free to have everything of him.
He was willing to do anything to keep you by his side. The thought of losing was so terrifying that it would make him throw up.
Tate learned every single detail about you. Your mannerisms, your likes and dislikes, your dreams, and your fears. Everything. And that includes your schedule since you wake up, and since you go to sleep.
That was his definition of love. No one ever taught him about how to express it, and he ended up being the way he was with you.
One day he invited you over to his place. The Langdon's house was empty, and he was going to take advantage of it. No doubt.
“Your mom isn’t home?” You questioned as you followed him behind, going upstairs straight to his bedroom. Little did you know this wasn’t going to be another afternoon of playing board games while listening to some music.
“Nah, dunno where she went but she won’t be back any time soon.” He shrugged and let you inside of his private space,
You went to lay down on bed, feeling relief in your aching back after a long day at school. “Damn, I need some rest!”
Tate chuckled softly and sat on the edge, looking at you as you closed your eyes and tried to relax. He was focused on your steady and calm breathing, on how your breasts went up and down with every inhalation and exhalation. His eyes stared at your lips, at how kissable they looked. He felt a sudden desire, the intense urge to make you his. Feeling conflicted, he shook his head and tried to distract himself, pretending to ignore how aroused he was getting.
He wasn’t going to say it out loud, but of course he already had some wet dreams of you. He imagined you beneath him, your precious body shivering and responding to his touch, to his kisses. Your cunt wet and ready for him, just how he wanted to.
“Y/N…” Tate cooed, unable to hold back any longer.
“Yeah?” You opened one of your eyes and spotted him, sitting on the bed with his fists clenched over his thighs, while his breathing looked kinda rapid. “You ‘kay?”
“No.”
“Uh? What’s wrong?” You reincorporated and sat straight beside his warm figure. Your right hand touched his left, rubbing it up and down with your thumb.
Tate shoved you to the bed, pinning your arms above your head and holding them tight.
His breathing pattern was no longer normal. It was a heavy one.
His dark brown eyes locked with yours. Your orbs were wide, not understanding what the hell was going on. Or maybe you did but were in denial.
“Please. I want you.” He purred, seeing you with puppy eyes, the ones he knew you couldn’t resist.
“Hahah, you funny.”
He let out a frustrated whine, almost begging on his knees for you to get the hint.
“I’m not kidding. Pretty please. I need you.”
“Do you mean…?” You raised your head a few centimeters to look at his crotch in order to confirm your suspicions. Your cheeks had a cute blush as soon as you noticed Tate’s erection restrained by his jeans. It looked painful, and it actually was.
“Yes. I want to. Please, I truly need it. Please, please, please?” His voice was shaky and low, a needy desperate whisper. “Can I?”
This wasn’t what you expected for today. You saw Tate as a best friend, but you couldn’t deny he was handsome… And that he already provoked butterflies in your stomach before.
Hesitantly, you gave a shy nod with your head, giving him consent to continue. “But Tate… I’ve never done this before, I dunno what to do, I—” You trailed off, being cut off mid-sentence when Tate placed his lips over yours. The kiss was slow and tender, not rough at all. Your bottom lip was between his, as he nibbled it with extreme care to not hurt you.
After some seconds, he pulled apart and led his hand towards the side of your face, brushing some hairs away. “Don’t ya worry, princess. Leave it all to me, hm? I’ll be gentle. Unless you don’t want me to.” With that being said, he leaned into your neck, pressing his mouth on your sensitive flesh. He left sweet kisses, making you hum as you melted under him.
His lips continued to tease your skin, leaving some little bites between every kiss, trailing down to your collarbone. Tate stopped there and helped you get rid of your blouse, tossing it aside and continued his journey, this time kissing your sternum while his right hand cupped one of your breasts, kneading it gently over the fabric of your bra. He pulled down the straps and took off the piece of lingerie, setting your tits free.
The cold air hit you and your nipples perked up, looking ravishing and making him desire you even more.
He introduced one of the hardened buds into his warm mouth, sucking it greedily and making lewd wet sounds as he did so. His left rubbed the other nipple in circles, taking it with his thumb and index, pulling it and pinching it.
“Hmph… Huh…” You let out soft whimpers, slightly arching your back meanwhile he abused your breasts.
Tate stopped after some minutes, letting go of your nipple and looking at you, grabbing your chin and tilting your head to the side. He approached your ear and whispered, “You like this?”
“Yes…” You begged. Your voice was already ragged and shaky.
Instinctively, you pressed your thighs together, rubbing them as a pathetic try to feel some relief. Tate realized it and spread your legs with one of his hands. He took his digits right to your clothed pussy, eagerly rubbing the spot where your clit was.
“Someone’s already wet? Cute.” He giggled and took off his striped sweater, throwing it away. He positioned himself between your limbs and pulled down your pants, mesmerized as he saw your damp panties. Tate continued rubbing your bundle of nerves over the fabric of your underwear, still fascinated at how humid you were.
This was the moment he had been waiting for the past weeks. He wasn’t going to need to jerk off to your photos anymore, because now he would be able to jerk off to your tits in person.
Tate removed the last barrier that was stopping him from touching your womanhood directly. He pulled them down to your ankles and you helped him to get rid of it by shaking your feet.
He got closer to your cunt and placed your legs over his shoulder, spreading your folds with two of his large digits, blowing some air at the sensitive meat. Finally, he started sucking on your swollen clitoris, enjoying the feeling of your dampness against his face.
“Mmh…” He moaned, still toying with the nub. You grabbed him by the hair, not thinking about what you were doing. You just let yourself go and pulled him closer to your pussy, wanting to feel more. Your body twitched, unconsciously bucking your hips against his mouth that was currently making slurping sounds.
His attention changed and was now on your slit, teasing just the entrance with his hot tongue, while his nose rubbed against your clit. He lapped your pretty cunt, savoring your juices as if they were a delicacy.
Looking at your adorable face contorting in pleasure, he introduced his ring finger into your wet, tight hole. It was a slow and kind movement because the last thing he wanted was to hurt you. He slipped it deeper, pumping it in and out with care, increasing speed after a few seconds once he saw you comfortable. “Tell me if it hurts…”
“Mhm… It feels nice. Huh…” Your melodic whimpers and moans were just too much for him. He could listen to you for the rest of his days and never get tired of you.
Without further ado, he introduced his middle finger, now finger-fucking you with two. Tate’s thumb was also working wonders on your lil’ bundle of nerves in circular motion.
She was clenching around Tate’s large fingers, that he curled inside of her, hitting the right spot to make you squirm and feel a new and foreign sensation in your lower belly.
“Fuck it, I can’t wait anymore.”
He undid his belt, unzipped his pants and pulled down his boxers, quickly getting rid of them and letting them fall to the wooden floor.
You just stared in awe; it was the first time you saw one in real life.
Tate grabbed his hardened cock and stroked it a few times on top of you, finding amusing your silly reaction. The reddish tip was glistening with pre-cum, which he used as lube. He spat at your pussy and rubbed his slick saliva with two digits, before finally thrusting his dick.
He did it slowly, beginning with the head. Eventually, he pushed his entire length, hitting your cervix and stretching you out for the first time.
“Fuck, you’re so tight!” Even if he was taking the lead, he was a whiny mess, vocal and loud.
He continued pounding into you, his gaze never leaving your face. Tate loved how you rolled your eyes to the back of your head and how your little mouth was letting out such nasty sounds.
The room was filled with slapping and wet sounds, created by his skin slapping against yours, his balls always hitting you with every stab. Again, he placed your legs on his wide shoulders to have a better angle and pump into you deeper than before.
His big veiny hands were roaming all over your body, specifically your breasts. Within minutes, he developed an addiction to them. Probably because of his mommy issues? He grabbed them roughly, tweaking both of your nipples as he fucked you mercilessly.
Tate lolled his head as he felt your hole gripping him tight. Very tight.
He increased the pace and moaned your name, begging you to squeeze him tighter.
“Oh, please, please, please!” The blonde kept whining. He left one of his hands taking care of your nipples, while the other went back to torture your clit. He stroked it in circles, and then up and down, applying the enough amount of pressure to make you beg for more.
“Tate, I feel like I’m—”
“It’s okay, let it go, mhm?”
You couldn’t hold yourself any longer and squirted all over him, coating his lower body with your warm fluids.
“Oh, oh, oh, oh, gonna cum!” Tate pulled out from your cunt and pumped his cock with his hand finishing with a loud moan. His hot sticky white cum coated your breasts and abdomen, creating an incredible sight that he always imagined.
All spent, Tate threw himself next to you on the bed, pulling a blanket to cover both of you as he filled your pretty face in candy pecks.
“Did it hurt? First time usually does.” He looked at you, concerned for your wellbeing. “I was too rough?”
You laughed and shook your head no, caressing his messy locks with your fingers, tenderly scratching his scalp. “Don’t worry, I’m fine, really.”
Tate smiled at you and kissed you on the lips, “You’re so pretty, Y/N.”
You hugged him from behind, him being the little spoon this time. Your mind was going wild; you were still processing what happened and was about to drift to sleep when he whispered.
“Y/N…?”
“Mh, what is it, Tate?”
“I love you… Please be mine?”
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ruwriteshours · 7 months
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✰ RUNNING AWAY AFTER CONFESSING TO THEM ⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯ OT7! DREAMIES
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pairing: OT7! dreamies x fem!reader
genre: fluff, suggestive, slight angst
warning: shaming reader for being a virgin, a whole lot of cliche, lots of hand grabbing and pulling lol, i got a little too carried away with Haechan & Jeno :p
@xrenjunniesx did smtg similar to this and i got inspired <3
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✰ MARK.
"Mark, you have to give yourself a break." You advised, watching as he rubbed his face in exhaustion.
It's been five hours since Mark spent doing his song-writings in his room for his upcoming comeback. As much as you admired his hardwork, you also hated when he overworked himself.
As his best friend, you wanted him to get the rest he deserves but it was impossible for the stubborn boy to succumb to your wishes.
Oh, how much you love him.
Rolling over the bed as Mark continued to do his work on his desk, you begin walking over and snatching his pen mid-way while he was writing.
Mark let out a disgruntled grunt, hand reaching out to grab onto it but you only held it away further.
"Give it back, I still have tons to finish!"
"Not until you get some rest." You stuck your tongue out defiantly, "You've been working for hours, just come here and talk to me for awhile and then you can go back, please?"
Mark looked into your eyes for a moment before letting out a sigh of defeat.
"Fine."
And that's when the both of you find yourself laughing away from the stories you both shared from your childhood.
"Remember that time when you got braces and you were complaining that you couldn't eat meat." You laughed, "So you blended the chicken and started drinking it!"
"Oh man, it tasted horrible. I don't know why I did that." He cackled. "And I look so ugly in braces too!"
"That's not true." You disagreed, watching as he was wiping away a tear from his eye.
"If anything you looked cute." You mumbled, looking down at your feet. "I liked you back then too."
Shit! You didn't mean to say that!
"What was that?"
Fuck! You were screwed.
"Huh? Nothing." You backed away.
"I couldn't hear you just now. Tell me!" Mark pushed on, holding onto your arm to prevent you from retreating.
You pulled away from his grip.
"It's nothing!" You tried again, standing up onto your feet hastily.
"It's not nothing when you're literally red in the face." He said, making a move to stand up as well. "Come on, tell me. We promised not to keep secrets from each other."
"Just let it go, Mark." You groaned, hiding your embarassment.
"We're literally best friends, you have to tell me."
"That's literally the problem!" You snapped.
"What?" Mark paused, looking at you with wide eyes.
"I said you looked cute in braces because I like you back when we were kids." You pulled your hair in frustation, "And I still like you now! Okay? I have always like you more than a best friend!"
As soon as those words leave your mouth, you could feel the clockwork ticking slow, nibbling your bottom lip in nervousness as you watch Mark's face contort to confusion.
Anxiety arises when he begins to open his mouth, but you didn't let him say anything when you dashed out of the room and into the living room, ignoring his calls.
"Hey! Wait, where are you going?" His voice was nearer to you than you expect.
Just as you were about to open the front door, it was slammed shut when his palm made contact with it.
You mentally cursed Mark for his long legs, having that advantage to catch up to you. You could feel his hot breath at the back of your neck, you shuddered at the contact, refusing to turn around despite his body being much closer to you than it has ever gotten.
"Turn around," He demanded, your name escaping his mouth. His voice tickling your ears as you made the move to turn, eyes closed from the sheer shame of confessing to your best friend.
You could hear his chuckle, making you close your eyes even more tightly, if that was even possible. You were definitely sure that your face was redder than before, not having to expect the situation to unfold in the way it has.
"Open your eyes." He said softly.
However, he was greeted with a shake of the head from you, stubbornly refusing to meet his eyes.
He pouted, though you couldn't see as you were still having an internal battle with yourself.
Just then, an idea popped into Mark's mind, hand slowly reaching out to your neck, goosebumps filled in your body as he lifted your head higher. You were confused with his actions and just as you were about to ask him what he was doing, his lips met yours in a passionate kiss.
You let out a sound of suprise as you began to kiss him back on instinct, teeth clashing slightly as his warm lips moulded into yours with such intensity that you didn't want the moment to go away too soon.
Unfortunately, Mark pulled away, which caused you to open your eyes in disappointment.
However, just as you meet his eyes, you could see him smile smugly, face inches away from you.
"I guess you can open your eyes." He teased, which only made you more embarassed, looking away but you were immediately pulled back by his hands and was met with another surging kiss, which lasted longer than the previous one.
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✰ RENJUN.
The thing about your friendship with Renjun was that the both of you provide equal balances when it came to taking care of each other. It was never one sided.
He was your emotional support and so were you to him. It was a solid friendship from the start, so it wasn't out of the usual for him to get extra protective whenever you would injure yourself during practice.
So you couldn't understand why you felt a sudden tinge of butterfly at the pit of your stomach this time when he carried you out of the practice room after you sprained your ankle.
In fact, it was such a normal occurence that even your friends didn't bat an eye. You ignored it, thinking that you were still skitterish and that the stupid feeling will eventually go away but the more Renjun took care of you, the more flustered you felt. Flushed faced and stuttering profusely when he would ask if you were okay.
"I told you not to try out that dance move!" He scolded you gently, carrying you in a piggyback as he nagged at you like a worried mom.
Again, usually you would take his gesture nonchalantly but this time, you would only apologise while hiding your face at the crook of his neck.
Renjun smiled at your action, finding you adorable.
"You're lucky you have me."
Ever since then, you began avoiding him for the sake of saving yourself from rejection, you knew deep down that Renjun couldn't possibly reciprocate your feelings. It even took awhile for you to process your emotions towards him but the more you thought about it, the more it made sense.
Renjun had been there for you, had been your number one support system and was overall, kind, generous and caring. Who wouldn't want him?
Unfortunately, you couldn't take that risk and opted to avoid him until you eventually got over it.
Little did you know, Renjun didn't like it one bit.
Especially when you would go as far as to turn the other way when he would approach you. He let it slide initially, thinking you needed space and tried to be understanding.
However, he was very concerned when you began to act weirdly around him, being too anxious to talk to him and being way too overly jumpy when he would touch your shoulder or doing something as simple as a brush on the hand. He thought he had done something to scare you and he wanted to apologise if he did.
But when he came up to you and did so, he was very shocked to find out your actual reasoning.
"Look, it's not you. It's me!" You cringed, hating the way you sounded. Renjun raised an eyebrow, not fully convinced with your words as well. "I'm serious! Lately, I've been having this strong feelings towards you and I can't help but feel nervous around you."
"What 'strong feelings'?" He asked.
"Do I really need to spell out for you?" You retorted, "I. Like. You."
His eyes widened at your straightforward confession, but you were quick to backtrack on your words when you realised you had just spoken aloud impulsively.
"But it's nothing serious— I swear! I'm just distancing myself so that I can get over it and we can be back as friends!" You chuckled nervously, not wanting to embarass yourself more than you probably have.
Without even looking at him, you turned your heels and began speed-walking away, wanting nothing more than to burn a hole in the ground.
Before you could make your exit, he gripped onto your hand, stopping you from your escape.
"You do have a way of confessing, don't you?" He scoffed playfully, pulling you closer so that your chest would touch his. "Dummy, why would you try to get over your feelings for me?"
"Because I know you don't feel the same— ow!"
You rubbed your forehead where Renjun flicked at, glaring at the boy.
"Idiot, you didn't even let me say anything."
"W-What?"
He leaned in closer, breath fanning your face before he gave you a light peck on the lips.
"I like you too."
And that is when you gained the confidence to pull him by the collar to steal another kiss.
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✰ HAECHAN.
"Hey! Get back here!" The infuriating male chased after you, watching as you fastened your pace whenever you saw him.
For the past few days, Haechan had noticed your obvious distance towards him, which only made him upset whenever you refused to acknowledge him. He would sent you texts everyday but was only met by a single tick.
It was frustating to see you get so comfortable around his friends but immediately turning stoned-faced when it came to him, especially when you were the closest to him than anyone else!
Having had enough of your sudden cold attitude towards him, he was determined to find out why.
"What do you want, Donghyuck?" You asked in mild annoyance, partially to cover up the fact that your heartbeat kept racing whenever he was near you.
"Okay, that's it! What's your problem with me." Haechan huffed, arms crossed as he blocked you from the door.
"I don't have a problem with you." You lied.
"Then why do you keep avoiding me?" He asked sternly.
"I'm not."
"Yes, you are."
"No, I'm not."
"We're not gonna talk in circles here." He groaned.
"Great, so let me out." You pushed him aside and began walking towards the door.
You gasped in shock when Haechan held your waist to tug your body closer, face buried in your neck. "Haec—"
"Tell me what's wrong." He said, softly this time.
You gulped nervously, hand holding onto his as you tried to remove yourself away from him, but the persistent male held on tighter.
"I'll let go after you tell me the truth." His voice muffled against your sweatshirt.
"Promise you won't laugh at me?" You asked shakily.
"I promise."
He looked up, piercing eyes gazed onto yours as he saw your pinky out in the open, waiting for his to intertwine against it. He smiled softly and reached out for your hand.
You sighed, mind going haywire as you tried to calm your nerves.
"I like you, Haechan. Like— really, really like you." You emphasised, eyes avoiding his as it was focused on your feet, "I got jealous when you got touchy with her because you were never like that to me."
You mumbled the last part.
"Her? You mean, my junior?" He clarified.
"Yeah.." You trailed off, hating how pathetic you sounded.
A moment of silence passed by when you heard Heachan let out a humouress laugh. You frowned, heart clenching at the thought of him mocking you.
"I knew it!" You shook your head, "I should've never told you anything. Forget I said anything." And with that, you took off.
You ran as fast as you could, desperately trying to get away from the most humiliating situation that you had stupidly gotten yourself into.
Too consumed in your self-pity, you didn't notice an incoming car driving its way towards your direction. It was when a loud honk snapped you out of trance but even then, it was too late.
Just as you were about to accept your fate, a hand pulled you, making you collide with the person.
"Idiot, did you not see where you're running!" Haechan yelled, face full of worry as he scanned over your body to look for any injuries.
"You promised you wouldn't make fun of me." You teared up, ignoring his previous question.
"No! I wasn't making fun of you." He explained, hand gripping your shoulder in an attempt to make you look at him. "I just find it funny that you would get jealous of her."
"I fail to see how that's funny." You crossed your arms.
"It's just, I should be the one confessing first." He revealed.
"What—"
"And don't even get me started on how Renjun would get all up on you whenever he sees you. I hate that shit." He rambled on.
"You were jealous." You concluded.
"Was that not obvious?" He shrugged. "So, I guess we both have a fair share of jealousy."
"But we were just talking about you." You justified, still in shock with his confession.
"Doesn't matter, now that we've both declared our feelings, he needs to back away from my girl." He smiled proudly.
"Um, excuse me. Who said I wanted to be your girl?"
"I literally chased you down the street like a maniac, are you really gonna prolong the inevitable?" He deadpanned.
"Hm," You pretended to think, "Walk me back home first then maybe I'll consider."
"I'll do more than just walk you back home."
"Watch it." You said sternly, face beet red as his cocky smirk was plastered on his face.
"God, you're so sexy when you're serious." He leaned over to give you a peck on the lips, "But let's see how serious you can get when I'm balls deep inside you."
And with that, Haechan did fulfill his promise by doing more than just walking you back home.
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✰ JENO.
"I'm sure Jeno likes you." Haechan repeated for what seems to be the fourth time.
"Of course he likes me," You deadpanned, holding onto two pieces of dresses that you doubt would look good on you. "I'm his friend but does he like me?"
"Again, yes. He does." The male groaned, looking around to see piles of clothes scattered across your room. "You don't need to dress yourself up too much, he loves your own style."
You frowned, recalling the fretful memory a few days back.
"I heard Jeno likes girly girls."
"Yeah, that's what I heard too." Another one gushed, "That's why I don't see her as a competition.
"I know right. I mean, look at her!"
"Jeno must be blind if he ever goes out with her!"
And to think you met him and started off as casual flirting.
"That's a lie. Do you know how many pretty girls that are just drop-dead gorgeous? And you'd think he'd settle for this?"
"You're underestimating yourself, just ask him out normally." He shrugged, as if it was the most simplest thing you could do.
"Like this?" You asked incredulously, gesturing to your clothes.
"What the fuck does that even mean?"
"Ask him out with a baggy shirt and sweatpants? Are you serious?" You threw your dress onto the floor. "He'll laugh in my face, for crying out loud!"
"Look, I'm not gonna feed into your delusions so I'm gonna head outside and by the time I get back, you better be done." He walked out, ignoring your calls for him to come back.
In the end, you just settled with a warm sweatshirt and a denim skirt. It wasn't too fancy but it definitely wasn't your usual style.
"Are you done yet!" Haechan yelled from the other side of the door, too which you answered back, opening the door as he eyed your outfit with a hum of approval. "Not bad. Let's go."
The whole outing went relatively well, I mean—as well as it could cosidering your failed attempts at trying to ask Jeno out in private was very evident. A second couldn't go smoothly when girls would swoop in and join in the conversation, where you would have to awkwardly leave when the girls would get too flirty.
Little did you know, Jeno dreaded the attention, desperately wanting to spend some alone time with you. He sighed in defeat as he tried to tune out the conversation, shoulder slumping when you walked away.
As if the night couldn't get worse, Mark had drunkedly suggested to play a game of truth or dare. You had reluctantly agreed as Haechan practically pushed you in the circle. You blushed when Jeno sat by your other side, knees touching yours.
Rowdiness consumes the room as each took their turns, you looked away in disgust as Haechan made out with a girl as a dare. When it came to your turn, you had meekly picked truth, causing the room to let out sounds of disappointment.
"Okay." Jaemin smirked, watching you tensed up when he called your name. "When was the last time you hooked up?"
You looked down in shame, knowing that you hadn't been intimate with anyone for as long as you could remember.
Giggles could be heard as the girls pocked fun at you, one of them decided to berate you. "Of course she hasn't done anything. Why would you even bother asking her that?"
You were about to speak up when someone beat you to it.
"There's nothing wrong with that." Jeno spoke up, glaring at the girls. "And there isn't anything cool about shaming others for it, too."
"I'm not shaming her, I just think it's pathetic that she hasn't." She scoffed playfully.
"And you think it's not pathetic that you think you're better than her because of that." Silence filled the room as the girl stuttered, tears welling up her eyes.
"I—"
"For the record, I wouldn't fuck you even if I got paid to do it."
The girl stood up and ran away in embarassment, other girls following behind while glaring at you and Jeno.
It was silent for awhile before Mark spoke up.
"Well, this was fun."
After the awkward incident, the party ended shortly after. Slowly the crowd became lesser and you think it's time to leave after helping with the clean-up. Haechan was your ride and you had to wait outside his car alone while he went to the bathroom. You shivered at the cold breeze when suddenly, you felt a jacket wrapped around you.
Turning around, you saw Jeno, with a big smile as his eyes sparkled under the light. You awkwardly shifted, too shy to look at him for a little longer.
"You okay?" He spoke up, to which you give a firm nod.
"Thank you for standing up to me, by the way."
"That was nothing." He shrugged, "I would have done it to any friend."
Friend.
"Of course, we're friends." You gulped, fighting back tears, "That's all we'll ever be."
He called out your name with a hint of confusion, "What's wrong?"
"You know, I don't think I can stay friends with you." You told him.
"W-What, why?" He asked, taking a step closer towards you.
"I just don't know if I can ever deal with just being your friend." You revealed, "I mean, I can't exactly blame you either, I'm just an idiot for liking someone that's out of my league."
You didn't mean to pour all of your doubt onto Jeno but it was something that had been kept inside your heart for the longest time and it just burst out unexpectedly. Luckily, your conscience stopped you from spilling out more than what you have, shaking your head when he would try to come near you.
"Shit! Just ignore what I said." You said regretfully.
"No, talk to me." He pleaded, your name escaping his lips.
"Just let it go, Jeno." You stepped back, "Forget about it, please."
"No, there's no way I'm forgetting what you just said."
Just as he was about to speak again, Haechan came out, to which you signed in relief when he clicked his car keys, giving you the opportunity to slide in his car, Jeno following behind to stop you.
"You can't leave." Jeno pleaded, "We have to talk about this."
"Leave me alone, Jeno."
"What's going on?" Haechan spoke up, eyeing the two of you.
"I just really want to go home." You ignored Haechan's question, he didn't push further and only gave Jeno a look.
Thankfully, Jeno gave you space, but not before giving you one last glance as you sat on the passenger seat, you didn't bother looking at him, eyes focused on the front as Haechan entered the car.
The whole car ride was silent, Haechan didn't bother asking you what had happened, knowing that you didn't want to talk about it.
"Call me if you need anything." He said.
"Thank you." You closed his door before making your way to your apartment, keys in hand.
You stopped dead in tracks when you see a familiar figure standing outside your door, drops of sweats on his forehead as his shirt was wrinked up. You gulped nervously, mentally preparing yourself as you walked up to your door.
Jeno's head immediately turned towards you, he stood in front of your door with his arms crossed, face full of determination as he stared you down.
"Can you move." You looked down at your feet.
"Not until we talk." He said firmly.
"There's nothing to talk about."
"Well, maybe to you but I have a lot to say." He said sternly, "You didn't even let me say anything before you start assuming that I wasn't interested."
"You said I'm your friend." You frowned, confused with his words, "Why shouldn't I assume that!"
"Because I thought you liked Haechan!" He shouted, chest heaving up and down.
"W—What, why?"
"Well, for one, you came to the party with him, and two, both of you would always come in pairs all the damn time so I'm sorry if I saw it the wrong way!"
"You should be because there's nothing going on between me and Haechan." You explained.
"I got that now." He muttered sarcatically, "And what were you even talking about with 'liking someone out of your league'?"
"It's pretty self-explanatory!" You deadpanned, "You're hot— like really hot, and look at me, you'd want to go out with someone who looks like this!"
"Someone as gorgeous as you, yeah!"
"You don't understand!"
"Make me understand then!"
"I'm sorry." A woman's voice spoke up, the room beside you opened as she walked outside the hallway, "Could you both keep it down a little, I have work the next morning."
"Sorry." The both of you mumbled in unison.
"We're done here." You said, taking your keys to open the door as you walked in to slam it shut on him.
However, he put his foot in between the door before squeezing his way inside. "Could you stop running away from me, we're having a serious conversation here!"
"Well, how about I take back my confession so you don't have to stress yourself out too much."
"There's no way I'm letting you take that back!"
"Well, too bad. I did." You crossed your arms, as if you had solved the problem, but your smile quickly dropped when you noticed his expression.
"Are you sure about that?" He smirked, trapping you behind a wall as his arms caged around you.
"What are you doing?" You asked nervously, watching as his eyes looked at you up and down with hunger.
"Changing your mind." His mouth made contact with your neck as you let out a loud moan.
You were in for a long night.
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✰ JAEMIN.
Jaemin had always been a romantic. To you, it could come as an advantage or the complete opposite. For one, he would always notice the little things that would upset you, offering comfort and food to cheer you up and overall being the most caring and loving friend someone could ask for. However, his charms played a huge part in fuelling your hopes towards the lover boy. You couldn't risk destroying whatever you had with Jaemin just because you couldn't control your emotions. For that, you couldn't bring yourself to tell him how you truly felt.
This was one of those days. You were sick for the past few days and Jaemin had took the liberty of taking care of you, despite you warning him that he could catch your illness. The boy couldn't care less.
He placed a hot cloth on your forehead, bring you a bowl of soup that his mom made and rub circles at the your hand. All of this actions were too overwhelming for you to the point where you had accidentally blurted out your feelings towards him.
"You're such a boyfriend material, Jaem. I wish you knew how much I love you." You sighed dreamily.
Of course, in your sickened state, you hadn't realised and went back to sleep after your confession.
Jaemin chuckled at that and gently caressed your cheeks, admiring you, even though you were basically at your most unappealing state, tissues stuck up your nose as your eyes were puffy from the flu. Eventually after a few minutes, he too dozed off.
When you had awoken up the next morning, you felt much better than before, thanks to Jaemin. As you shuffled your way to the kitchen, you could already see him cooking up something. You quietly sat down on the stool as you watched him do his thing.
When he turned around, he gave you one of his signature smile that made your heart melt.
"You feeling alright?" He walked over, handing you a plate of omelette.
"Yeah." You yawned, "Thanks for taking care of me, Jaem."
"Of course, why wouldn't I take care of the girl who's in love with me?" He teased, making you freeze in your seat, eyes widening at his words.
"W—What are you talking about, idiot?" You attempted to cover up, chuckling nervously when he rounded to corner to get close to you, in which you backed away in return.
"Come on, let's not kid ourselves here." He smirked, "How long were you gonna keep your feelings hidden away from me?"
You began backing away more further, "Stop coming nearer, you freak!"
"Stop running away then!"
"Get away!"
"Get back here, missy!"
He broke out to a sprint, chasing you around the house when you began picking up your steps. You were red from embarassment and Jaemin didn't make things any better for you.
"Stop running!"
"Never!"
Unfortunately, you did stopped when Jaemin tackled you down on the couch, his hands holding your arms to restrain you from moving. You squirmed under his touch, humiliated that you had just gotten caught.
He began tickling you, to which you only thrash around, laughing hysterically as you begged him to stop.
"I'll stop when you don't make a move to run again." His hands made its way towards your stomach, continuing his attack, "Do we have a deal?"
"Deal! Deal! Just stop!"
True to his words, he did and that's when the laughter died down as the both of you stared into each other's eyes, lost in the moment as he began to lean in. You didn't get to process his actioms before you began kissing him back, hands wrapped around his neck to pull him closer as he gripped onto the couch to support his balance, hovering over you as you both made out.
After awhile, you pulled away, to which Jaemin leaned in again, wanting to get another kiss.
"I'm still sick, Jaem." You leaned away.
"I don't care."
And with that, his lips reconnected with yours once again.
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✰ CHENLE.
"Idiot, watch where you're going." Chenle scoffed, bumping his shoulder against yours. "I almost spilled my drink on my shirt because of you."
You rolled your eyes at the taller male. Chenle had been your arch nemesis since the dawn of time. It was never usually serious though, more of light jabs and insult thrown at each other but none were ever meant to be hurtful. You never really hated Chenle, it's just that you had this dynamic where bickering was a constant need to keep the conversations going with him. And you really like aggravating the hot-headed male.
"Whatever, I bet it would make it look better than whatever you're wearing."
"You little bitc—"
"Okay!" Jisung interjected, squeezing his way between the two of you, hand awkwardly stretched to keep a distance. "Let's have fun at this party and not cause unnecessary fights."
"But she— fuck!" Chenle groaned, bending down slightly to rub his ankle that Jisung had kicked, glaring at the male. "Right, Chenle?"
Chenle let out a sigh of defeat before nodding along to his best friend's words, burning holes at your face when you snickered at him.
The night went on, full of alcohol and dancing and you were honestly on the brink of passing out but you kept downing down shots, your body at a point of losing its own control.
"Okay, that's enough." Chenle snatched your glass away, which caused you to whine obnoxiously.
"Dude, you're completely intoxicated. I'm taking you home."
"N-No! I wanna stay! It's fun here." You slurred, stumbling with your balance.
"Uhuh, come on." He held your waist to balance you up, "Let's go."
After bidding goodbye to your friends, he guided you towards his car and just when he tucked you into the passenger seat and helped you with the seatbelt, your words made him paused his actions.
"You know, Chenle. You're lucky I like you because I would never let anyone do this to me."
"Is that so?" He hummed.
"Mhm, here feel my heartbeat." You grabbed his hand and placed it on your chest, he could feel your heartbeat beating fast, "It always like that whenever I'm around you."
He smiled softly, a blush crept on his face. "Let's get you back home, cutie."
The following day felt like a blur, you groaned when you stirred yourself awake, only to be greeted by three missed calls from someone.
You grabbed your phone and looked through the call sheet to check who it was, your brows furrowed in confusion when you saw that those three calls came from Chenle.
Just as you were about to ponder more, your phone began to vibrate and he called you again, making you answer his call with a loud huff.
"What do you want?" You said.
"Shower and get ready, I'll pick you up."
When you were about to reply, he had already hung up. In your tired state, you didn't have room to argue and you shuffled your way to the bathroom, yawning loudly in the process.
"Mind telling me why you're acting so weird today?" You entered his car, watching as he helped put on the seatbelt for you.
"Can't I just be nice today?" He shrugged, a smug smile on his lips.
Throughout the car ride, he would occasionally steal glances in your way and purposely shift in his car seat to get closer to you. At first, you didn't think much of it and assumed that you were just overthinking but the more you could feel his arms brushed up against yours when he made a u-turn, the more you couldn't contain your flustered state. Letting a noise of complaint when you realised that he was doing it intentionally.
"Ugh, is it something I did yesterday? I swear, whatever I did or say means nothing. I was drunk." You explained, once he had parked his car outside your destination.
He wasn't fully convinced with your words, "Haven't you heard of 'drunk words, sober thoughts'?"
"Just tell me what I did—"
"You confessed your undying love for me." He revealed, making your eyes widened as you let his words sink in.
"You said I was the reason your heartbeat's beating so fast everytime." He came in closer, hand reaching out to hold your palm, "Let's put that to the test and see if you're lying."
Truth be told, your heart rate was beating so fast that you swore you could hear it. Embarassment flooded through your face as your only thought was fleeing out of the car, reaching out for the door handle, your heart dropped when it clicked back in place.
"Nuh-uh, I knew you were gonna run away." He tsked, "Come on, sweetheart, nothing to be embarassed about."
"Ugh, Chenle. Let me out!" You groaned stubbornly. "This is kidnapping!"
"You're such a drama queen, at least turn around and look at me."
"No!" You refused, "If I do, I feel like I'm gonna humiliate myself further!"
"You won't, just look at me please." He said softly, hand gently holding onto your shoulder to turn you around.
Just as you did so, his lips met yours in a passionate kiss. His other hand cupping your cheeks as his teeth gently bite your bottom lip, causing you to gasp as he took the opportunity to slide his tongue inside.
For a moment, you indulged yourself into the kiss, hand reaching out to tug his hair as you both made out in his car.
Pulling away, you slowly opened your eyes, only to be greeted by a cocky smile from Chenle.
"No more running away, we're together now." His hands made its way to yours as he interlocked it.
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✰ JISUNG.
"Do you think this girl looks cute?" Jisung showed you his phone, for what felt like the tenth time, at this point, you were grown tired at his obliviousness to your bubbling jealousy.
"I don't know, does she?" You asked in annoyance, trying to appear as if the topic bores you.
"I don't know, that's why I'm asking you." He scratched his head awkwardly, looking back and forth between his phone and your disinterested figure.
"Are you serious, right now?"
"What?" He tilted his head in confusion.
"Nothing." You huffed, "It's whatever."
"I'II help you find a guy too if that's what you're angry about." He muttered, as if that was what you were truly upset about.
"It's not even about that!" You snapped, head turning back towards the TV screen as you tried to contain your emotions.
"Then what is?"
"Forget it!"
"No, something I'm doing is upsetting you and I want to know what."
"Fine." You looked at him, watching as he slightly flinced at how fast you turned. "Since you want to know so much, I like you Jisung." You rambled on, "And it hurts when you don't feel the same! Watching you for hours finding some chick all while trying to keep it to myself at the fact that I'm madly in love with you!"
You let out a breathe you didn't know that you had held for so long, conscience crept in when you realised you had exposed yourself a little too much. Regret started seeping in as you began rushing to collect your things to leave his apartment before you embarass yourself further.
"Fuck! I should go."
"Wait!" He grabbed onto your hand, preventing you from moving.
You tried to pull away from his hold, shaking your head when he came closer.
"Just leave me alone for now, okay?" You pleaded, "I really need time away from you."
He seemed to hesitate, hand still gripping onto yours when he realised your distress state and eventually loosened his hold, giving you the chance to run away.
Ji: 'I hope you get home safe.'
Ji: 'I know you want space but I really want you to know how much I care about you. Talk to me when you're ready, I'll wait.'
It's been a few days since you've been actively ignoring Jisung, despite him agreeing to give you space, he didn't necessarily stopped checking in with you through messages, to which you only replied dryly.
Other than that, he didn't try to approach you and would only give you a small smile from a distance.
Days went by till weeks and you were still in the process of getting over him. It seems as if the odds were in your favour when you met a a friend of a friend, you both seemed to be getting along well and you agreed to hang out with him when he offered.
Hearing this, Jisung didn't like it one bit. Hating the fact that you were trying to get over him. He rushed at your apartment door, banging on it repeatedly, stopping when you opened it abruptly.
"Jisung?" You asked, "What are you doing here—"
You were cut off when he engulfed you in a tight hug, face buried in your neck as he mumbled something you couldn't quite understand.
"What?"
"I said don't go on the date with him." He pleaded, eyes glossy as he looked at you. "I was an idiot, I should've realised it sooner. I love you too and I was too scared to admit it too!"
You gasped in shock but Jisung still continued on.
"I tried to move on because I thought you didn't feel the same but when you confessed to me that day, I was happy." He explained, "You told me you needed space so I gave it to you, but I can't let you get over me. I won't let you!"
He sobbed quietly in your arms while you tried to soothe him.
"Calm down." You patted his shoulder, but he only gripped your waist tighter.
After a moment, he lifted his head up to which you took the opportunity to give him a kiss. You could hear him gasped in shock but he eventually melted against your lips, moulding it against yours as your arms wrapped around his neck, pulling him closer.
It was safe to say that you had ditched your date.
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©ruwriteshours
576 notes · View notes
shellshocklove · 1 year
Text
conversation | peter parker
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pairing: college!peter parker x college!female!reader
summary: peter parker is in the friendzone. and it sucks. especially when the girl he’s in love with is dating his best friend. smack dab in the middle of a bad situation peter struggles to keep his feelings at bay when the girl of his dreams comes to him for advice about her failing relationship.
warnings: i guess post!nwh, swearing, cheating, peter pining for reader, everyone being a bad guy, smut 18+ (minors dni!!!), unprotected sex, creampie
word count: 4.1k
a/n: um my first peter fic! it’s based on the song conversation by joni mitchell. listen to it, or don’t, i’m not your mother. i said i was going to stop posting writing, but i have “i must create or i’ll go crazy” disease so... (i’m still not a writer)
main masterlist / ao3
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She comes to him for conversation, for comfort, for consultation. But Peter wished she came to him for something else.
He remembers the first time he saw you. How he’d thought his heart had stopped for a second, forgetting how to do its most basic function. How could someone look so effortlessly beautiful? How could a voice sound so sweet while asking such a mundane question?
“Is this seat taken?”.
“N-n-no!” he’d manage to stutter out, his cheeks flushed red and completely taken aback by the fact that you were talking to him. You’d given him a playful smile before seating yourself next to him.
Did he believe in love at first sight? Yes, after seeing you for the first time, Peter started to think he did.
Meeting you in a chemistry class, Peter thought, must be the universe’s take on a bad joke, because… you two had chemistry. Everything just felt so easy when he hung out with you. His smile always wide, cheeks hurting. Conversation flowing freely, or engulfed in a silence, that was always comfortable. The only thing though, even though you two had chemistry, you weren’t any good at it. Actually, you were barely passing.
And that’s how your time began. Sharing sodas after class, in a rundown diner, over chemistry homework. You’d seen how Peter had gotten straight A’s on all his tests, and one day you’d carefully asked if he would be so kind as to help you. Those were the actual words you’d used. If Peter would be so kind. As if he wouldn’t have done anything you’d ask without a second thought. Okay, maybe not anything. He doesn’t think he’d murder someone if you asked… or maybe… if you were in danger and it was the only way–
“Peter!” you laughed, waving your hand in front of his face, “Are you even listening to me?”.
“Huh!?” he hummed, a familiar warmth spreading through his cheeks as your laugh rang through his ears.
“You zoned out a little,” you said, scrunching up your nose. Oh god he loved when you did that– you looked so cute.
“Oh! S-sorry” he stuttered out, still embarrassed that you’d caught him daydreaming, “What were you saying?”.
“Ehm… just forget it” you looked away, waving your hand, “It was just something Harry did again”.
His name coming from your mouth felt like a bucket of ice-cold water over Peter’s head. Harry Osborn, your boyfriend, and Peter’s roommate.
As much as Peter loved Harry, he didn’t treat you well. This was usually how your conversations during your study dates would go, once it was clear that after a few hours of studying, you were done with chemistry for the day.
You’d usually bring up small things that Harry had done that hurt you or annoyed you. And Peter would be tasked with giving you advice, or comfort, or consolation. You always apologized after, for bringing Harry up in conversation, but Peter always brushed it off telling you it was fine. But it wasn’t. It always reminded him about his own failures. How if he hadn’t been such a pussy at Betty’s party, all those months ago, and told you how he felt, this wouldn’t just be a study date, but a real date. The problem was just that Harry had beat him to it that night. In Harry’s defense, he didn’t know about Peter’s feelings about you. No one did.
You’d disappeared at some point in the night, and Peter figured you’d gone home. Turns out you did go home, but not to your own apartment, but to Peter’s and Harry’s instead. A fact Peter didn’t know until the morning after when he’d bumped into you in the kitchen, his heart dropping to his stomach at the sight of you in nothing but Harry’s shirt.
Peter’s dreams weren’t completely crushed at that moment. He still harbored hope for you. Harry was quite the whore (Harry’s own words by the way, not Peter’s), and this wasn’t the first time Peter ran into one of his hook-ups in the kitchen after a night out. In Peter’s mind this was only a one-night stand. But he couldn’t have been more wrong. Not soon after, you started showing up at the penthouse, not to hang out with Peter, but with Harry instead.
Peter tried his best to not be disappointed when you came over. But the tiny spark of hope he had about one day calling you his, soon fizzled out and died. Every time he saw you and Harry kissing, holding hands; he knew nothing would ever happen between the two of you.
Trying to forget you, he started busying himself with classes and patrol, seeing you less and less. He’d run into you sometimes when you were visiting Harry. Only a short “Hello” leaving Peter’s lips as he’d retire to his room before Harry could see how much Peter wanted you.
Back in his room, Peter would convince himself that you and Harry being together was the best thing for you. If you were with Peter, he’d only end up hurting you. You deserve the very best, and Peter knew he would never be good enough. He was a fucking mess most of the time. He was always late to things, never on time, he couldn’t afford to treat you to nice things like Harry did, and his double life could make you a target, which was the last thing he wanted.
Peter kept his distance the best he could, but as time went on it got harder and harder to convince himself that Harry treated you the way Peter thought you deserved. Peter knew Harry wasn’t being honest with you, and it killed him to keep his mouth shut. The bubbling anger simmering under the surface every time he’d see a girl who wasn’t you, slip out of Harry’s bedroom. Then like a curse, a few moments later, his enhanced hearing enabled him to eavesdrop on yours’ and Harry’s conversations on the phone. Harry would always apologize for being too busy to come over and hang out. And with the softest voice, you’d let Harry off the hook every time. Leaving the penthouse, to go on patrol after nights like that, Peter admitted, his punches hit a little harder.
Your relationship tasted especially bitter in Peter’s mouth whenever Harry would throw parties at the penthouse. A hand over your shoulder or around your waist, never leaving your side, showing you off like you were a prized possession and not a human being. Was this the final straw for Peter? Seeing yet another way Harry didn’t treat you as well as he should; that had made him not want to make up an excuse, like he normally would, when you’d ask him if he wanted to study at the diner.
Peter had kept his distance from you for the last six months. Tried to stay in his lane. To turn the other eye. To fold his feelings for you in on itself like a piece of paper so many times he hoped they’d disappear. But one look at you again, sitting across from him at your regular booth at the diner, and his origami-ed feelings had sprung up again like a blooming flower in spring.
“I just really wanted to see him, you know? I’ve been so stressed about this chemistry exam– that I know I’m gonna fail by the way, and work’s been kicking my ass– and I just wanted to hang out with my boyfriend… but he canceled on me three times this week”.
Or maybe the final straw, for Peter, was the way your whole body deflated in front of him. Peter could feel his heart break in real time watching you turn your head away, hiding the wobble of your bottom lip. And the worst part of it all was that Peter knew why Harry had canceled on you. He’d been over at someone else’s place. But Peter knew he couldn’t tell you that.
Carefully he reached out his hand, brushing it over the back of yours as you rested it on the table. “I’m sure Harry’s just been busy! I know he’s got his exams in a few weeks, and he hasn’t been home as much lately” Peter said, trying his best to make you feel better.
You watched your hands for a moment, how Peter brushed his hand over yours trying to sooth you the best he could. Then you turned your hand, wrapping it around his in a gentle hold. The soft touch of your warm hand, making Peter stop breathing for a second.
“Yeah,” you nodded, “you’re probably right, Peter”. You tried your best to smile, but Peter could see your sorrow written all over your face, breaking Peter’s heart even more.
“You’re a good friend Peter!” you started, “I’m so sorry for always talking about Harry, but it’s just that you know him so well, so it’s easier to talk about him with you– and you always manage to say the right thing to make me feel better” you looked down at your intertwining hands.
“It’s almost scary how easily you can make me feel better Peter– it’s like you have superpowers or something” you said, a chuckle escaping your lips.
“Oh, I didn’t tell you about my superpowers?” Peter quipped, trying his best to cheer you up even more. A smile spread across your face as you shook your head.
“My powers are actually being very good at chemistry– AND knowing how to make my friend who’s failing her chemistry class feel better”.
A giggle left your lips at Peter’s joke as you let out a sarcastic “haha, very funny”, playing along.
If only you knew though. How he wished that this mess could be fixed with his actual superpowers. How he wished he could just put on the suit and save you from Harry. How he wished he could free you.
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Landing safely on the rooftop of Harry’s penthouse, Peter looked around for his backpack he’d hid with his clothes. He’d managed to hide his double life from Harry so far, and he planned on it staying that way, which meant changing in and out of his suit crouched behind a rooftop vent, every day.
He was back earlier than usual, cutting tonight’s patrol short as it had turned out to be a quiet night. He’d stopped a man stealing a lady’s purse, and after he’d helped a man, who he was 90% sure had dementia, find his way back to his apartment. After that he’d just swung around the city for a few hours. At sunset he’d found a good spot at the top of this new skyscraper they were building downtown. His feet dangled off the scaffolding as he watched the sky turn every shade of pink and orange, before the sun dipped below the horizon.
Back home, on the roof, Peter felt the soft touch of the spring night against his naked skin. He quickly changed out of his suit before stuffing it back into his backpack, swinging it over his shoulder before he headed towards the rooftop door. With a light bounce in his step, Peter made his way down the stairs, his head filled with thoughts about all the studying he needed to do before his exam next week. Slipping through the front door he’s so distracted by his own thoughts he almost doesn’t hear it. The sounds of muffled moans accompanied by Harry’s bedpost hitting the wall.
But he does hear it, and images of how sad you’d looked earlier at the diner start flickering through Peter’s head. Before any rational thoughts can stop him, he’s fished his phone from the back pocket of his jeans. He’s had enough. His fingers work on their own accord, pulling up your contact.
Peter hi, um are you at the penthouse right now?
He knew you weren’t, but he figured this was the best way to bring it up. Taking long strides across the floor, he made his way towards his bedroom door. Why did he suddenly feel like he needed to hide?
He passed through his bedroom door while he slipped his backpack off his shoulder. Not even ten seconds later his phone buzzed in his hands with your reply. He sat down quickly on his bed, one leg bouncing in an anxious rhythm, as he read your reply.
You no? i’m at home why?
Peter i think you should come over there’s a girl with harry in his room
Did this make him a bad person Peter asked himself as he watched the three dotted bubble appear and then disappear. Was this just him acting out of his own selfishness? Letting the devil on his shoulder whisper in his ear and guide his hand? Or did it make him a hero? Saving you from a toxic relationship?
You i’m coming over.
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The sound of your footsteps echoed down the streets, mixing with Peter’s calls of your name as he practically jogged behind you trying to catch up to you.
“Peter” you sighed, “just please go back home”.
“No!” he finally caught up to you, grabbing a hold of your wrist, pulling it a little, making you slow down.
“I don’t think you should be alone right now”.
Your face was blank, the only sign of any emotion coming from your restless eyes dancing across his face. He couldn’t decipher what you were thinking. You were angry of course. You were furious only minutes ago when you stormed out the door with both Harry and Peter at your heel.
Harry had spoken his sorry sentences. Telling you it wasn’t what it looked like. Begging for your forgiveness. But he was only kidding himself trying to convince you it wasn’t what it looked like, that he hadn’t cheated on you, when you’d literally caught him with his dick inside another woman.
Harry stayed behind in the lobby, probably thinking it wasn’t worth it to go after you into the spring night, in only his robe. Just as Peter were about to rush after you Harry spoke up,
“If you go after her you’re dead to me!”.
The venomous bite to Harry’s tone stopped Peter dead in his tracks.
“I know you fucking told her” Harry accused, “If you go after her I’m kicking you out– I NEVER want to see you again”.
But standing here, out on the streets of New York at midnight, holding your hand Peter knew he’d made the right decision.
“Ok” you said it so softly Peter didn't think he’d even hear it if his hearing wasn’t enhanced.
“Ok” he repeated.
You pulled your hand away, a knife twisting in Peter’s heart, and started walking. You didn’t say a single word on the way back to your apartment. Peter imagined you were hurt, but you weren’t crying, and Peter didn’t know if that scared him or comforted him.
Safely back inside your apartment you didn’t even acknowledge his presence as you threw your jacket off by the door. Then you walked down the hallway, taking a right at the end, to where he assumed your living room must be. Peter had never actually been in your apartment before.
He followed you down the hallway, after neatly hanging both his and your jacket on your coat rack. He found you on the floor by your couch, your back resting against the front, holding your knees to your chest, your arms wrapped tightly around yourself, as soft sobs escaped you.
“I’m sorry you had to find out like that” Peter apologized, sitting down next to you on your carpet. A feeling like his only purpose in life was to comfort you, overcame him. So, he wrapped a hand around your shoulders, pulling you against his chest. You leaned in closer to his body, your hands shifting from hugging yourself, to hugging Peter tightly.
“No, this was exactly how I needed to find out” you sobbed, “I needed to see it with my own eyes, or I wouldn’t have believed it”.
Peter let you cry until there weren't any tears left to cry, cooing you and whispering all the most reassuring words he could muster up past midnight.
“I don’t know why it hurts so bad… I think deep down I always knew he wasn’t being honest with me– he always kept me guessing” you said. No, Peter thought, he kept you down.
Before Peter could say anything, you lifted your head from his chest, a big wet spot on his t-shirt left in your wake. You looked him right in the eye, and Peter could feel a budding warmth of red covering the apples of his cheeks.
“Please Peter” you pleaded, moving your face closer, the closest it’s ever been to his. Your right hand traveled to cup his hot cheeks, pulling him even closer to your face. So close he felt your breath tickle his skin while you spoke,
“You always make me feel better– it’s your superpower, remember? Please make me feel better”.
Closing his eyes, Peter knew he couldn’t deny you, his heart screamed out for you. This was everything he wanted, was it not? With a shuddering breath and a heart beating out of his chest, he closed the space between you, brushing his lips over yours.
Your other hand cupped his other cheek, pulling him even closer to your body, letting out a small whimper as you kissed him back. Peter felt like his head was spinning. He didn’t know where he ended, and you began.
Then it all became a bit of a blur. His hands found your waist as you climbed onto his lap, brushing your tongue over his bottom lip, deepening the kiss. Your hand left his cheek to toy with his hair, and Peter just about moaned into your mouth. He needed more of you, and with the way you were grinding down on his growing bulge, he knew you did too.
Warmth flooded his body wherever you touched him, and he didn’t think he could ever get enough of you. When your hand left his hair, he just about sighed with disappointment, until he realized how you toyed with the hem of his t-shirt. Raising his hands, he helped you pull it off him. Absentmindedly, you threw it away, before your eyes fell to his chest, quickly scanning over his muscles before they traveled up to his face, where they looked into his soul. Half a second later you pulled him in for another heated kiss.
His hands fell to your ass, helping you grind down on him. Fuck, he was properly hard now, his cock straining against his jeans. With every brush of your core against his cock you whimpered into his mouth, making Peter almost feel lightheaded. You were so pretty. Your lips tasted like raspberries, and under his hands your skin was softer than velvet.
“Take off your pants please” you pleaded against his skin as you started pressing soft kisses down along his jaw and neck.
His hands raced to unbutton his jeans. You pulled away from his neck, staggering to your feet on wobbly legs, making a whine leaving Peter’s lips. Over him you started pulling on your pants, dragging them down your legs along with your panties in one go. Mesmerized by your silhouette, Peter almost forgot what he was doing. You quickly sat down beside him, fingers coming up to hook around the waistband of Peter’s jeans. Then you started pulling them down to his mid-thigh along with his boxers. Peter almost forgot to breathe as you freed his aching cock.
When you climbed onto his lap, Peter’s brain started working again. His hands fell to your ass, steadying you as you got comfortable on his lap.
“D-did you want me to…” Peter trailed off, not knowing how to say what he wanted to say. Instead, he showed you. His right hand rubber over your ass and hip before his fingers brushed over your clit. You mewled at the contact, your eyes closing before you shook your head.
“No, no I just want you– I need you, Peter”.
Fuck, Peter thought. He’d dreamt of hearing you tell him you wanted him, for months. And now it wasn’t a dream anymore.
“O-okay” he stuttered, reaching a hand between your bodies, grabbing at his shaft in a rough hold. With his other hand he helped guide your hips to hover over his tip, sliding it back and forth over your slit, and lining it up with your opening. He could feel how wet and desperate you were, coating his cock in your arousal.
With a hand resting on his shoulder, you slowly sat down on his cock. First slipping the tip in, before your walls swallowed the rest of him, taking him fully inside. A choked moan fell from Peter’s lips as he savored the feeling of your velvet pulsing walls around him. Rocking your hips back and forth, your puffy clit rubbing up against his pelvis, as your mouth fell open in a silent gasp, gaping around words you couldn’t get out.
“Shit” you panted, “You’re so deep”.
“Yeah” Peter breathed out, head falling back against the couch, “You feel me in your tummy?”.
“Fuck,” you lifted your hips, slowly starting to move, “y-yes, I d-do”.
Looking up at you, as you moved over him, Peter thought you looked like an angel. The way your ceiling light lit up the back of your head, Peter was sure you were wearing a halo.
Your rhythm increased and soon you were bouncing in his lap. Your breathy moans falling from your lips, the wet noises coming from where you were connected, and the way you were starting to clench around him, were making the tension in Peter’s stomach grow. Knitting his eyebrows together, Peter didn’t know how much longer he was going to last.
Scared he’d finish before you, his fingers found your clit, pressing down in tight circles. Under the touch of his fingers you almost jumped, while a shuddering breath left your lips. Then Peter felt himself start to get desperate, meeting your bounces with a thrusting of his hip, pushing his throbbing cock even further inside you.
Every brush of his fingers over your clit, coincided with a thrust of his hips, and soon he felt your wall flutter around him. He could feel how your wetness ran down his shaft and down his balls, and he knew you were as close to the edge of ecstasy as he was. His fingers never let up on your clit, and soon you clenched around him so hard he couldn’t hold it back anymore.
“Fuck,” Peter spat, “I’m gonna cum”.
“I–Inside” you moaned, “You can come inside– it’s okay”.
Your words pushed him over the edge, making him come hard inside you with a grunt. He didn’t slow down his fingers on your clit, and the feeling of him filling you up and the brush of his fingers, must’ve pushed you over the edge. Half a second later your hips stilled as Peter felt the frantic pulses of your orgasm milking his cock.
The feeling of you riding out your orgasm on his sensitive cock, clenching down on him as your body shook with aftershocks, it was almost too much, too intense for Peter. His breath came out in hard pants, and his body felt hot to the touch.
Peter didn’t know how much time passed as you both came down from your highs. It could have been three seconds or three hours. All Peter knew was that with you, he lost all sense of time. But this moment of bliss must come to an end. Everything is temporary, and someone must be the first to pull away.
On wobbling legs, you slid off his lap, sitting down next to him on the floor. You leaned back, grabbing your panties off the couch. Peter averted his eyes. The act was somehow too intimate to watch, even after what you two had just done. Instead, he busied himself with pulling his pants back over his ass, and tucking himself away, as a silence fell over the both of you. It felt heavy, loaded with questions he didn’t know if he wanted an answer too. After a few minutes a whisper left Peter’s lips, breaking the silence,
“I think I might be homeless”.
You didn’t answer right away, but Peter could hear your breathing change multiple times, like you were going to say something,
“I’m sorry”.
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tagging some mutuals (this is so embarrassing): @hollandweather​, @luciwritesstuff​, @userholland​, @t-lostinworlds​, @silkscream​, @sparklingsin​, @logangarfield​, @justapurrcat​, @tomdutch​, @devotion​, @lnmp89​, @mayal0pez​, @melodicheauxxo-writes​,
...
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2K notes · View notes
tubatwo · 1 year
Text
back into you - choi beomgyu
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summary: beomgyu is a sweetheart and you just want to be his friend
pairing: gn reader x choi beomgyu
genre: fluff; 1.3k words
a/n: gyu saying he wants to be invited to hang out more broke me </33 btw the other boys don’t exist here because they wouldn’t ignore gyubear like that
playlist: adoy - wonder, adoy - swim
if you didn’t know choi beomgyu by now, you were basically an idiot. choi beomgyu was a friend to all. people either wanted to date him or be him (or maybe both).
but there was only one problem.
many people saw beomgyu in the wrong light.
a typical day at school for beomgyu consisted of a few tasks: making the classroom laugh, making the staff laugh, making his friends laugh; basically just making everyone around him laugh.
once he completed those tasks and was back in the comfort of his own bedroom, he was able to take his mask off. be himself. fully, and completely. it’s not that beomgyu wasn’t a naturally funny guy, or that he didn’t enjoy bringing happiness to those around him, it’s just that he was starting to feel a bit burdened. on days when he wanted to keep to himself, people huddled around him, asking why he was suddenly quiet. if he was alone, people would look for him to make them feel better since they were feeling “soooo bummed about failing the quiz”
oh, and don’t even get him started on his love life.
girls constantly touching his shoulder, laughing a little too hard at everything he said to the point where it felt forced. it was almost exhausting.
at the end of the day, beomgyu was just a quiet boy who wanted to be loved. he had a bittersweet relationship with silence. during the day he desperately yearned for it, but at night it was like a reminder that loneliness came with it. beomgyu didn't want anything grand. he simply wanted someone who understood him.
it seemed like nobody understood any of this. nobody except you, of course. you noticed it. you noticed him in the library, headphones on while staring out the window. you noticed the soft smile on his face whenever the class was assigned to read love poems. you noticed the look of disappointment on his face whenever he tried to talk to his friends about a new band he discovered and they brushed him off. you noticed because he reminded you of yourself. to you, beomgyu seemed unattainable, but you were going to make it your mission to be his friend.
a few days later…
a test was coming up and you wanted to take some extra time to go over your notes. you decide to skip lunch and find an empty classroom to study in. after successfully avoiding any roaming teachers, you walk around the hallway until a familiar tune reaches your ears.
give me a feeling, slowly in a deja vu
it wasn’t loud at all, just enough for you to hear as you passed by a door. you peek through the window and see beomgyu doodling in his notebook while swaying his head. you hesitate before slowly opening the door, making beomgyu look up in surprise.
“sorry! it seems like we had the same idea,” you begin, “is it okay if I study a bit here?” beomgyu smiles and nods. “are you sure I won’t be a bother?” you ask, just to make sure. “no, it’s okay, really.” he reassures you before going back to his notebook. after a minute or so, you decide to make small talk. I mean, this is the opportunity you were waiting for, isn’t it?
“I really love this song!” beomgyu’s head immediately lifts at this. “really? you know them?” he asks. you nod and smile. “yeah! this one’s my favorite, but I also love their song lemon.” beomgyu gapes at you a bit before smiling and asking, “you’re y/n, right?”. you look at him with wide eyes, not expecting him to know you at all. “yeah, and you’re beomgyu?” you ask, already knowing the answer. you could’ve sworn you saw his ears go red. “the one and only.”
you and beomgyu spent the rest of the lunch period sharing music recommendations. before you left, he asked you for your number so he could make you a playlist. you felt like your heart was going to explode. a playlist? usually, you’re the one making people playlists, only to receive a simple thumbs-up emoji in return, and now beomgyu wants to make you a playlist?
the few days you two spent together turned into weeks, and then months. eventually, you and beomgyu made the tradition of meeting in the empty classroom every lunch period. it felt like the only time when you could quietly bask in each other’s presence. this was until it wasn’t. you and beomgyu were drawing doodles of maltese puppies and tiny bears in each other’s notebooks when you heard loud footsteps nearing the room. a group of people barge into the room giggling, making the two of you flinch.
“yo, gyu! where you been?” a guy asks before walking over to ruffle beomgyu’s hair. the guy takes a look at you and smiles mischievously. “oh, did I interrupt something?” you see beomgyu put on a fake smile before responding. “no, they’re my close friend, sometimes we study during lunch breaks.” you try not to blush at him referring to you as a close friend, and not just a friend. although, a large part of you wished for something more. beomgyu’s group of friends decide to make themselves comfortable and sit in the other chairs. beomgyu gives you an apologetic look before you shake your head at him, signaling that it was okay.
after a while, one of the girls looks at you with squinted eyes and speaks up, “gyu, they’re so quiet… how do you even get along?” your head lifts up and you fidget nervously, all eyes suddenly on you. “and what is this song? god, it’s putting me to sleep.” a different girl chimes in.
beomgyu slams his notebook shut before sighing. “could you all leave them alone? you know nothing about them.” he looks down before quietly mumbling to himself, “you know nothing about me…” the room is filled with an awkward silence before the guy from earlier clears his throat. “uh, okay, how about we just see you later?” the sound of chairs squeaking fills the room as they all get up and leave.
you turn around and place your hand on beomgyu’s arm. “hey, i’m really sorry about that…” beomgyu looks at you in disbelief, shocked, but not shocked enough to ignore the feeling of your soft hand on his skin. he shakes the feeling off before apologizing. “what? no, don’t apologize. they shouldn’t have said those things to you. they don’t understand.” you give him a smile before removing your hand, leaving his arm feeling colder than ever.
a moment of silence passes before beomgyu speaks up. “I can be myself with you.” you look up to meet his eyes, the two of you staring lovingly at eachother before the sound of the bell interrupts you, shaking you out of your trance. you both begin packing up and you softly grab his arm, giving him the warmth that he desperately missed. “would you wanna maybe…” you trail off, “do you wanna go to the new arcade with me this weekend?” beomgyu freezes and blinks at you as you continue. “I also know this really cool cd shop nearby, so maybe we could go… there… too?” you hesitate, starting to believe that you’ve crossed the line by seeing beomgyu’s blank reaction. you almost turn around to accept defeat before beomgyu suddenly goes, “yes!”. he notices how loud and awkward his response was before correcting himself, “I mean, yes, I’d love to.” you smile softly at eachother as he grabs both of your hands into his.
later in the week you receive a text from beomgyu.
gyu<3: can’t wait for our adventure tomorrow! :)
below the text is a link to a playlist labed “♥︎” and the first song is adoy’s swim.
I think of you
when I am sad and down
when the silence makes me cry
when it’s hard to try
I simply fall back into you
2K notes · View notes
xerotiny99 · 27 days
Text
Chasing Stars in the Dark // Request
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Pairing: Jeong Yunho x Reader [best friends to lovers]
Warning: smut, hard dom!yunho, sub!reader, manhandling, fingering, big cock yunho, unprotected sex, creampie, dirty talk, degradation, rough sex, cunnilingus, Yunho as a hard dom but still caring, etc.
Note: do not proceed if you're uncomfortable with any mentioned tags. Grab yourself a couple of snacks because this long as fuck. And not proofread.
Requested By: wattpad request
Gist: having broken up recently, you call your best friend and ramble all your sad tales to him. Yunho always kept an open mind and listened to your every chatter, no matter how envious he seemed listening to you. However, finding you seemingly heartbroken, he suggests you return to your hometown. Because he was too. Although, going back home might mean having more boy problems than usual.
Song rec: Stars by SKY
Word Count: 24,665
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"And he said, I dress like a slut!" you whine, aggressively sucking on the straw to get the remaining drink out of your glass.
The loud noise caused you to earn bothered glances from the surrounding people. You take a look around, seemingly unaware of what you had done, and bow your head a little; you turn back to your laptop screen, finding a familiar face grinning at your disastrous mistake. He doesn't need a reason to snicker at you, and why would he? Every moment of your life is mangled deeply within the awkwardness defined by your body, he only found it endearing. Did he?
"Stop it, Yunho," you groan, rolling your eyes at him. "That wasn't funny."
"To me it was," he shrugs.
You were sitting in the campus cafe, with your laptop propped open on the table and your favourite drink by your side. Mellow sun hung over your head, shining bright and dithering to the cloudy skies which the winds blew by. In the daze of the sunshine, you occupied the window counter with a long table and stools for seating; you preferred the single seating instead of the booth 'cause it would not engage you in unnecessary interactions. Or so you thought. Being an introvert, social interactions weren't really your strong suit. "But coming back to your real issues," he clears his throat, "he really said you dress like a slut? Oh my god. The audacity."
The moment his voice raised a baritone, you knew he was being overly dramatic about this situation; in a way, it seemed like he was mocking you. And maybe he was.
You roll your eyes again, "Yunho, I'm being serious!"
He whines, "so am I, Liyah. The audacity of a man to tell you how to dress is sheer atrocity and arrogance."
"Yeah yeah," you sigh, "but he was so perfect, Yun. Like, my Prince Charming."
"Okay, I wish I went deaf before hearing that," he jokes, two of his sleek fingers pointed at his forehead to mimic a gun, "kill me now, please."
"I wish I could," you huff, biting your lip. "I wish for many things; I wish I could get back with him."
For the first time in a while, you were yearning something else than comfort. Usually, after your breakups, you would call up your best friend and he would try to ease your mind over it, but this time you were craving for your best friend to be with you. Which was highly unlikely considering you both were in different cities, pursuing your undergrad degree. Coming from hometown, you were diaper buddies, born in the same hospital, on the same day, being neighbours and your families being lost long friends. This wasn't sheer coincidence; this was something from the book of fate for best friends.
Best friends. Those two words made your heart bitter. Agreed, when you two were kids, you were really good friends, always at each other's side and having each other's backs. You two were ride or die. Though, along the senior years of your high school, you started to see Yunho in a completely different light. To define it best, you were in love with him. Well, to be fair, love doesn't happen overnight, it takes time; and for you, it had taken eighteen years of your life to make you realise how fucked up you were for him. At times you wonder if he was too. Not that he would say it outright, but over the past years he had gone further and beyond to make you happy.
"No, Liyah! Repeat after me," he leans closer to his screen, the camera noting every detail of him, "I should not give second chances to hubristic dicks."
"I should not give second chances to hubristic dicks." You repeat, deadpanning, however.
"Was that so hard?" he leans back on his chair, adjusting his big headphones overhead and heaving out a breath, "Liyah, you don't deserve a guy like him. All he's ever done is second guess your relationship, judged you for your preferences and has never once respected your opinions."
He rolls back a little on his chair, grabbing his half-eaten snickers bar from the table and taking a good bite of it; he was in his dorm room, wearing a black tank top and jogger shorts. The room was kept dark with the drapes drawn over the windows, you could discern him through the screen only because his table lamp was burning directly onto him. Though, considering the murmured darkness in his room, you could still read the minute details on his face; his soft doe eyes, the hazy brown in them, and his plump lips almost too kissable to resist. The only surprise in his appearance was his hair. He had dyed it to a vivid colour of ashen blue, a complete contrast to his ebony hair you were used to.
"He was a misogynist." Yunho adds, "having such old school thoughts about women, and..." he trails off, "and it was visible in the way he treated you. I would never understand why you even considered dating him. I already told you he was a red flag."
You pout, "maybe because I was bored."
"If you're bored Liyah, maybe play a game or something?" he monotonously replies, satire reeking from him, "don't fall for dicks."
"Yeah, it's easy for you to say because you've never had your heart broken," you retort, "you've broken countless, however. How do you sleep at night?"
"Sound and peaceful, why?" he cocks his one brow up, "look, I haven't found 'the one' yet. A lot of them are pretentious bitches who only care about my dick."
"T-M-I, Yunho." You groan, "and it's quite obvious, girls are going to be after your body."
"Yeah, you think so?" he purposely places his elbows on the table, folding his arms to flex them. "I never caught up on that."
"Eat shit, fucker," you poke your tongue out at him, "no, seriously. You need to find yourself someone who stays longer than the time you take to pull your pants up after sex."
"Jeez, you have a way with your words, and that's really elaborate." He leans back, stretching his arms over his head, his muscles contorting to his command, "tell me, have you done anything stupid yet?"
"What do you mean?" you sound a little guilty.
"Don't fuck with me," he deadpans, keeping a warning tone instead, "you know exactly what I mean. Whenever someone breaks your heart, you plot a revenge story, and it never goes the way you plan them to."
"You're still salty about last time?" you whine, "we both knew it was a mistake. Lesson learnt. But you were my partner in crime, so..."
"Leave it," he sighs, rubbing his hands over his face, "I still feel grossed out remembering what we did. You're pretty ruthless, you know that?"
"If he thinks his car is the only love of his life, then he had it coming."
"You wrecked his car beyond repair. You should know guys love their cars." He pouts softly, and you retaliate, "yeah, and you still joined me because you didn't want me to do it alone."
"Of course!" he exclaims, snickering a little, "I wasn't going to stand by and let you ruin your ex's car all alone, he deserved it."
"You are such a dick," you laugh along, "you can't pick a side, can you? Okay. Jokes apart. I'm not planning anything crazy this time. I'm far too old for that. Besides, I have assignments due before our summer break starts. So, guess what? I'm stuck typing hundred words per minute."
"You are stressed out," he mumbles, leaning on the table with his elbow and then resting his chin on his hand; he sighs, dazed by you. "Is that why I can see frown lines on your forehead? They're so prominent, ugh."
"What, really?" you unconsciously touch your forehead, worried. "Haha, very funny."
"Hey, I'm trying my best to ease your tension out." He shrugs.
You roll your eyes, adjusting your wired earbuds before looking away; grabbing your glass of strawberry smoothie, you peer further off the window in front of you. While you were busy studying the passersby on the promenade of your campus, Yunho was busy studying you. Mellow silence fills your ears for the time being he was staring at you, staring your hazel eyes melting away into sheer exultation as you sipped your drink. He always found you quite alluring. The way you'd scrunch your nose when you liked something, the way your cheeks would pop out when you smiled, and the way you'd get so easily flustered by compliments; every little thing about you was etched in my mind, almost ingrained.
Yunho continues to let his eyes linger on you, adoring your eyes and your lips; admiring the way you were sitting alone, tugging at the straps of your camisole in an attempt to keep them in place. He had never noticed you for your appearance or your vanity, he only saw you for your smile, your silly habits and your captivating personality. So, when he was quite engrossed in ogling your face, it weighed on him how badly he had fallen for you.
"What, cat got your tongue?" you mock, putting your glass down and letting it clink against the table. Pulling out the claw clip from your hair, you let it fall on your shoulders.
"No, I was just thinking."
"What?"
"That I gotta stop engaging myself with you and your shenanigans."
You roll your eyes for the umpteenth time, and he grins, "I'm joking. I wanted to ask you something."
"Go on."
"What are your plans over the summer break?" he asks, genuinely appearing curious as his brows fold up.
"I haven't given it much thought," you mutter, running hand through your hair, "I was thinking of applying for a full-time job or something."
With a subtle tug of your shoulder, you heave out a sigh and shake your head. Although, you had pretty much no motivation to think about your leisure holidays in front of you because you were too depressed about your breakup. You wouldn't say 'your now ex' was truly the one for you, but you were most definitely dwelling on the fact that you're going to have to be alone while your lifelong crush flirts with other women. That's the sad reality of unrequited love. You're deep into your thoughts, delving even deeper into your notions of your ex-boyfriend and your crush, seeming to shut out everyone around you. Yunho too.
"Liyah, are you listening to me?"
You snap back to reality, lips trembling and eyes quickly falling onto Yunho's face. "I am."
"Be a better liar, Liyah," he groans, shaking his head, "never mind, I was saying if you have nothing planned for your summer break, you can come back home." He has certainly gotten your attention now. "Well, I am too," he shrugs, "just as a favour to Mingi."
"What, why?" you muse, ruminating about the newly mentioned individual who happened to be your friend too. "You owe Mingi a favour?"
"It's not a bad thing," he pouts, "just volunteering at the summer camp."
"You want me to volunteer too?" you deadpan.
"Yeah," he mumbles, "I could use some company. You know I'm not too fond of the people back home, especially the ones of my age. And then there's unwanted attention from girls."
"Oh, Jesus Christ, Yunho," you monotonously speak, "if you want me to be the lady repellent, you could've said so."
"Not exactly a lady repellent. I'm not trying to soil my chances with Alexis." He smirks, "we've been texting. And let's say there are some details I can't tell you."
"I know," you roll your eyes, "by the way, texting and sexting are two different things. Genius."
"Her body," he mouths, cupping the air in front of his chest.
You narrow your eyes at him.
"Okay, no objectifying," leaning back into the chair, he rests his arms behind his head, "I'm kind of surprised Mingi did not text you regarding the volunteer work."
"We lost touch."
"Really?" he scoffs, "hard to believe considering you two were really close back in the days. Didn't he have a big fat crush on you?"
"It was a teeny tiny one." You state, "besides, we did not interact much after graduation."
The look on Yunho's face tells you he doesn't believe you; not even a bit when you're trying to forget about those days, all the times you were close to this person. Song Mingi was a good friend of yours, you met in middle school and had known each other since then. He's a little goofy and timid, an introvert more likely. Somehow, to your surprise, Yunho and he got along perfectly. For some reason you were worried about that they won't because you thought Yunho would feel left out. He never did. Yunho did not show any sort of disdain towards you making new friends, not even once.
Though, there'd be a time when he'd started showing his bitterness towards Mingi; at that time, you pushed it away, seemingly thinking it was nothing more than playful envy between the two of them. Both of them competed for your attention, considering all was a friendly banter. Until it wasn't. Mingi had a crush on you. Big time. He confessed it to you at the end of your graduation party. You kept Yunho in shadows regarding this fiasco, although it was stifling to not share everything with him as you usually would. That night, you gave Mingi a well thought riposte.
You told him the truth.
You unveiled your deepest secrets to him.
He was quite understanding. Not judgemental at all.
You liked Yunho. Always had.
When Mingi got to know of the truth, he chuckled and said, "I'm not dumb to be so oblivious. But I think he's the real fool to not see it."
You laughed along, stating, "it's been ten years. I'd give it some more time."
Mingi couldn't believe you, "you've liked him for ten years? What, since you were eight?"
You nodded, "come on, it's not that bad. I'll tell him eventually, taking one step at a time. Because, who wants to ruin such a good friendship with him."
Mingi did not say anything later on, he only wished you luck and pecked your cheek. The night was absolutely beautiful, somewhat schematic due to your realisation. If you don't confess soon, you'll be stuck with someone who's not him. And it goes both ways. After graduation, you and Yunho both chose to leave your hometown in search of better opportunities, both having been accepted into colleges cities apart.
If you recall your high school years, you had mentioned it a few times to him, that you'd want to go to the same college as him. But nothing goes as planned, does it? It's been three years since graduation, both of you in your junior years at college, and million miles away. You're grateful to the weekly, or sometimes monthly, FaceTime sessions with him; it gives you a sense of calm and comfort. Well, witnessing the joy on his face, for every little thing, does.
Yunho clears his throat, "what happened that night, Liyah?"
You take a deep breath, dismissing your reminiscent thoughts. "Nothing, really. We talked."
"If you say so." He doesn't believe it at all. "So, what's your answer? Do I see you over the summer break?"
You couldn't resist his sly smile and tempting eyes. "Sure. But I'm only doing it 'cause you forced me to. You definitely owe me one."
"Okay, princess." He rolls his eyes, "I'll see you then. Unfortunately, I have to take my leave now. Got a class today."
"Whatever." You poke your tongue out at him, "see you soon."
The call disconnects and you're all alone in the cafe with your empty glass of smoothie, a few other students and your phone buzzing quietly. You peer over the notifications once the screen lights up, finding texts from Yunho.
Yunho 🐾🐶 do you believe in coincidences?
You why?
Yunho 🐾🐶 mingi texted me he was asking about you seems like someone's not over their crush yet
You leave it, yun
Yunho 🐾🐶 nope see... now you have more than one reason to come back.
You fuck you
Rolling your eyes, you put your phone aside and groan at the situation; flustered, your face heats up and you try to hide the tint of red on your cheeks by laying your head down. Planting on the counter face first, you start pulling your thoughts apart. There's no way your summer break was going to be peaceful, neither here nor there. Though, you could say you were very much determined to confess your feelings to Yunho.
It was just...you were worried it was going to cost you your friendship with him.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆
            Summer break was here. The awful heat brought awful dread to the pit of your stomach, because you weren't prepared to meet either of the boys you were apparently close to. If you could put your nonchalant mind to work, you would realise you owe Mingi a relationship, and a draught confession to Yunho. The very sad part of your ordeal was the way you would approach it; you can't be lax with yourself or them, you can't be straightforward either. You had to think it through, whatever that is you had planned.
You were engrossed, immersed in the mindless notions when you park your car in the driveway of your suburban house. How badly had missed this place. The house is still the same, the grey walls, the wooden overhang, the roof tiles, and the aesthetically pleasing front porch stairs. Right beside yours, a meter apart, was Yunho's house. The Victorian style architecture never ceases to impress you, neither does the lush lawn and intricate landscape.
Heat simmers you out as you get out of the car and proceed to grab your bags from the trunk; putting a hand overhead, you try to save yourself from the sun before hastily making your way to the front porch. The overhang provides you with gelid shade, while you fumble with your bags to find the house key under one of the potted plants scattered on the porch. Upon finding it under some dead plant, you put the key in and turn it; the door unlocks and you're pushing past to get inside, your bags following after.
The vestibule, seemingly cooler than the outside, is empty and dark. To your surprise, the entire house is left cloaked in darkness. You slip out of your shoes, heaving out a sigh as the heat starts dissipating, bit by bit. Putting on the house slippers, you lug your bags behind you and come to a halt in the darkened living room; the drapes were pulled over the windows, not letting any lights pass through. You were aware your mom wasn't home; she was at work. But at least she could've left the curtains open, make sure you weren't blinded by the darkness once you come home. There's no point in thinking about your father, as he's usually out of town for work, awfully lot.
Chucking every notion into your mental bin, you stride to the windows and uncover the drapes, pulling them to the side while sunlight filters in. You turn around on your feet and quickly rid yourself of the wispy kimono you had over your body. Once you were out, you slump yourself on the couch and close your eyes. After a three-hour long drive, it was the first time in the day you had felt your skin breathe; however, you could've preferred for the air conditioning to be a little lower in the temperature.
You fish out your phone from the pockets of your shorts, which were stuck to your skin tightly because of the heat. Tugging at the straps of your embroidered camisole, you huff out a few breaths before going through your notifications. No recent texts from your mom, and no replies from Yunho. You had called him in the morning, before leaving your dorm room, informing him of your departure. He was ecstatic, evident in his voice and told you he had arrived a couple of days before you.
There was no need for you to have bittersweet sentiments about him reaching first, but you were somehow least prepared to face him, now that he was before you and gave you no time to think what your first words to him be. You two were meeting after three years, and the last time you remember, you hadn't gone a day without each other. Separation anxiety is a real thing, you thought. After many years of considering it a hoax, you had come to terms with it. Living in a different city without Yunho felt dreadful, a mere struggle till you could stand on your feet and do everything on your own.
Let's say you two relied on each other a lot. A lot.
"No texts?" you groan, opening yours and Yunho's chats. "You gotta be some kind of dick to ignore me..." sulking, you sink further back into the couch and rest your head against the edge. "Ahh..." you sigh, out of sheer spite and boredom.
You close your eyes again, not wanting to stare at the bland and vapid ceiling; the thought of you meeting your best friend after three years, swirls in your head. It's gonna be easy right? No awkwardness, no silences, and no teasing. Right? You have been FaceTiming each other, anyway, don't know why you have to be so worried about it. Perhaps, you were nervous to see him after a long time, only because you had confessions to make.
Lost in the vastness of your inklings, you don't perceive many things in your surroundings, especially the muffled footsteps ascending to your back. Your body flinches when a pair of hands grab your shoulders, eyes wide and on an alert; but your view is constrained to a dark silhouette covering its face with a purge mask.
"Gotcha!"
"Fuck!" you scream, managing to slip out of the person's grip and getting off the couch.
You've not even composed yourself when you hear a raspy voice rumble from behind the couch; from the apparent person standing behind it, clutching onto its stomach and throwing his head back in laughter.
"Oh my goodness," the all too familiar voice echos in your head, "you should've seen your face, Liyah."
When the dense vibrations of his laughter come to a halt, he whips off the mask from his face, revealing his fading ashen hair stuck to his forehead. Yunho smirks at you, flicking the mask on the couch before walking around to drop down on it. He takes a breath of air, perhaps tired from all the laughter while you narrow your eyes at him, your arms over your chest.
You're watching him with amusement; maybe it was the epicurean sense of your gaze, 'cause you couldn't help but drool at the man he had become. Yeah yeah, it sounds weird to you too. Maybe, spending three years away from each other had numbed your senses. Even after all the FaceTime sessions, you were erratically attracted to him; his toned body and how it was hidden beneath an oversized graphic tee and denim jeans. The most endearing thing about him, his shirt having a handwritten typography spelling out 'smile, zero worries'. That is definitely his personality.
"Not funny, jerk face."
"Oh, it really was," he chuckles, shrugging off his black leather jacket and letting it hang over the armrest of the couch. "Your face was worth going through all the trouble to find this mask in my attic. Too bad I did not have a camera on me."
"Is this how you welcome me back? By petty pranks?"
He shrugs his shoulders, letting his head fall back, "I had many things planned for your welcome; guess my efforts fell short. I'm not as lively as I used to be before."
"I'm glad you aren't," you grumble, going to pick up your bags when Yunho quickly scrambles on his feet and picks them up for you. "Woah, what a gentleman."
"Snark all you want; I know you love me." He snides, holding two of your bags in either of his hands, "to your room, then?"
You shake your head and roll your eyes, taking the lead as you walk down the hallway. As the hallway curves to a corner, the stairs begin and you take one step at a time, Yunho hauling the bags behind you.
"Would it be stupid if I asked you how you got in?" you mumble, calling to him.
Yunho heaves a murmured chortle, "babes, the balcony of your room opens right into mine. All I had to do was take a leap of faith. Literally."
"That's trespassing, I'll have you behind the bars," you retort.
"Aww, then wouldn't you miss me too much?" he pouts, "I got to jail, you lose a best friend and die alone."
"Pretty elaborate," you continue walking up the stairs, quite leisurely to keep the conversation between you two going, "I'm not dying alone. We made a deal, remember?"
"Right, we were born together, we will die together." He sighs, "we made a lot of hollow promises back then, did we not?"
The two of you are at the top of the stairs, you've stopped in your steps while he's standing next to you. Either of your eyes bore into each other's, searching for the verity of your so-called promises and pacts you had made when you were kids. It's all fun and games when you're kids, when you don't even think with a fraction of your mind and believe every word you say is genuine and candid. You and Yunho had your own sets of bargains ready by the age of fourteen; you were silly then, to consider yourself making covenants with your best friend about every little thing.
Not married till 30? You were going to marry each other.
No first kiss in your teens? You were going to be each other's firsts. And that applied to everything.
These were some of them, but the thought of being each other's first was a wild one. Luckily, you both had your first kiss at the age of sixteen; it was memorable for you, but terrible for Yunho as he remembers the girl he liked was only using him to make her ex jealous. It's all in the past. You're both twenty something now: twenty-one, one year away from graduating college. Of course, things, situations, conflicts, have taken turns for the better.
At the top of the stairs, it's just you and him, lost in the translation of the language your eyes spoke. What were you even trying to convey? Biting your lip, blinking uncontrollably while your heart pounds in your chest, too hard for you to think it would drop down to your gut. Maybe you were taking an apprehensive approach to your dynamic with him, because once it shifts, you know there's no going back.
Yunho clears his throat, looking away from you and stepping forward, "your bags are really heavy. What do you have in these?"
Your body shudders softly, squeaking at the absence of him next to you. "Just clothes."
"How many pairs did you get?"
"Not many..." you weren't sure if you were making sense to yourself, because you hadn't quite snapped out of your trance yet.
The little stare down at the top of the stairs was a homebound reverie to you. It put you in a deep state of cognisance, fulfilling your heart's desire because you were now persuaded by your stupid self to believe you had fallen in love with him. The soulmate type of love. Was it? It had to be. Because no one knows you like he does. Knowing every crack and crevice in your soul, knowing every little detail about you, remembering it, ingraining in his memory; he had to be in love with you, too. Right? It only made sense.
Yunho's long gone from your point of vision, and you're still stuck to the floor, contemplating, musing, or ruminating. No matter how you made overtures to your thinking, there was no way you'd think he reciprocates your feelings. Maybe it's too much wishful thinking. Has to be.
"Liyah, where the fuck are you?" he playfully calls out to you, his deep voice breaking you apart.
You shake your head and promenade down the narrow hallway once it the main structure branches into two; your house was like a labyrinth of hallways, and you'd find yourself lost in the maze at times. You don't know how Yunho remembers everything, but maybe it's habitual for him to remember, as much as you do for his house. Walking in your room, you find Yunho closing the balcony doors he had left open.
"No thoughts. Clear mind." You mumble to yourself before trudging further inside.
Yunho, alerted by your presence, turns around and offers you a smile. That goddamn smile. The one which shines brighter than the moon and the stars, heck, it would even put them to shame. His smile brought butterflies to your stomach, and the familiar feelings started bubbling under your skin. You were fucked.
Well, you might want to hold onto that thought just yet.
You're left to act on your instincts when he prances towards you and wraps your little frame in a bone crushing hug. He missed you. Clearly. His arms are tight and snug around your shoulders, his head tilting down to rest his chin on yours; your height difference gave him the biggest advantage ever, towering over you like a giant teddy bear. He was soft, and warm, comforting to you. Maybe why you did not think twice before hugging him back as tight as you could; you bury your head in his chest, inhaling his scent which was long lost in the virtual reality of FaceTimes. You missed him too. A lot.
Yunho always smelled like a sybaritic man, someone who'd be addicted to the life of luxury and pleasure. It was too sensual for you and your senses. Imagine, hugging your best friend who's basically sex on a stick. Yeah, your hormones were going crazy. Downtown crazy. You pull back from his embrace before you could feel yourself dripping in carnality by only inhaling the heart notes of his scent and step aside to fall onto your bed.
Not much was spoken. Not when you had practically snatched yourself out of his hold and flumped on the bed. Yunho doesn't bother saying anything to you, only maybe, he finds it better to just lay next to you on the bed. You prop yourself up by your elbows and turn your head to look at him; he was resting against the headboard with his head tilted to a side while his eyes remained fixed on you. There's a frail curl on his lips. And you wonder what it was about.
"I really needed that hug, thanks." You speak up, turning on your side and letting your head fall on the mattress; you still peeked at him.
Yunho couldn't bear the sight of you, innocently looking up at him through your lashes. He couldn't really help it either because your scent had put him in a daze of the past years, the reminiscent years of him stealing sniffs of you to realise how alluring your scent was. You always smelled luscious to him, having the hints of strawberry and coconut to your skin, your hair, and your lips even; he didn't know when he was addicted to you.
"Because of the breakup?" he asks, grabbing the fluffy pillow from next to him and hugging it close to his chest.
"Because I saw him again, before coming here," you blurt, "I wasn't ready for a confrontation. He approached me, already decided to win me back."
"What did you say to him?"
"I couldn't say anything," you mumble, "like words disintegrated on my tongue. I was blank. My heart desired to say one thing but my mind refrained from saying anything at all."
"You really weren't ready to see him," he snickers, "it speaks for the better of you, doesn't it?
"That I don't need him like I used to before?"
"You're growing independent," he points, "he never was the right choice for you, yet you let him get to the deepest parts of you. Liyah, don't make the mistake of going back to him. Find yourself a better man."
"I'm trying to," you sound despondent to him and he suggests, "there's not much time for the night to dawn over. I'll cook something for you and set up the rooftop, like the old times."
You sit up straighter, narrowing your eyes at him while your lower lip tugs down. "I don't trust you in the kitchen. Leave the cooking to me. You go set up the rooftop."
"You're leaving the hard part for me," he groans, running a hand through his hair. "Fine. But you know what I like right?"
"Lasagna? Mac and cheese? Jajangmyeon?" you list, pulling yourself out of the bed and staring at him, "I'm whipping up something easy. Too lazy to do go all culinary mode."
He gets out of the bed too, rolling his eyes at you before putting the pillow down. "Just make some P-B-and-J."
"We're not in middle school anymore," you state, already turning on your heels to exit the room. "I'll make some pasta."
"Whatever you want," he shrugs his shoulders and proceeds to walk to the balcony.
"I'll be back soon. Be careful upstairs."
"Don't worry, okay? I've done it countless times before. I'll be fine."
You nod and head downstairs to the kitchen. However, light on your feet, you were shaking with anticipation. Maybe this could be an opportunity to confess? It has to be right? Why else would he suggest it? You know your rooftop rendezvous have always been romantic; what's anti romantic about rooftop dinners? Nothing. Nothing compares to eating under the moonlight with the one you can rely on. It has been a long-time tradition for the two of you. The moment either of you spiralled down the road of depression or anxiety, you'd be up on the rooftop, looking at the stars.
In the kitchen, you're drifting around like a giant cloud, working yourself up to prepare good food for both of you. This is where you in a slump, thinking of easy ways to whip up something delicious. Given, you also had to consider the limited source of ingredients you have in the refrigerator. You're way too over your head, pondering. What if you make something disappointing? What if he doesn't like what you make? You're practically scratching the back of your neck, standing still in front of the closed refrigerator with thoughts circling around one thing; what to make.
Amidst the dense tranquility of the house, you groan out softly and pull the door of the refrigerator. Opening it, you find nothing of useful. This is atrocious. You're contemplating, deranged by the extremities of your mind, you have half a heart made up to prepare peanut butter and jelly sandwiches as he had suggested. But that is too basic. Is that what you would want to feed the man you had been in love with? Probably not.
Your dismayed conscience doesn't let you rest for even a second, immensely saturated on outdated thoughts and emotions; the noise in your head is quite louder than the affable footsteps resonating across the kitchen. It was when a warm hand had engulfed your shoulder bone, then you were brought to your reality with Yunho standing next to you. His face was shrouded with despair yet the desperate shine of the sinking sun had lighten up his eyes; he seemed to be in a melancholic state, lips jutting out. The warmth of his hand slips down your shoulder, alerting you somehow.
"Hey, what's wrong?" you ask, closing the refrigerator door.
He stood adjacent to the window, his ashen hair appearing as a cerulean tuft of sea, his face cherishing the golden glow. Was it possible for him to be any more attractive than he already is?
"I nicked my finger," he mutters, glancing down.
Your eyes trail along his, witnessing the alarming cut on his pinky finger. It was a long gash, deep even; why else would there be rivulets of blood cascading down his skin? Panic stricken, you hold his hand on yours, both of your palms cupped his hand to pull him closer to you. The contrasting shade of blood against his pale skin was terrifying, not as much, but it was genuinely intimidating. More blood oozes out when you bring his hand under your sharp gaze to inspect.
"How can you be so clumsy, Yunho?" you half-yell, half-question him, nibbling on your lower lip.
"I was careful, okay? I don't know how I cut myself; probably on the roof tile or something, I don't know," he explains, exasperated.
"Does it hurt?"
"No."
"I don't see..." you tilt his hand in a way to catch it under the dimming light of the sun coming through the window. "There isn't anything stuck in the cut."
He stays quiet, watching you, leaning over your petite body to wonder what you had been observing for long; it was certainly disporting to him, how you were so keen on studying the little slash on his skin, rather than his eyes which had been speaking to you for years. Absolutely ridiculous. He knows how you were, how eye contact always brought you a sense of unease and discomfort. And maybe holding a serious stare down with him might have been too heavy on your heart, because he even knows how desperately it hammered in your chest.
Biting down on his lower lip, Yunho refrains every strain in his muscles to lift up your chin and kiss your lips right there and then. He had been eager to taste them, always was. You have no idea how dire his yearning is, how avidly he dreams to be with you. In a broader perspective, he understands when to wear his heart on his sleeve and make it obvious to you. And for the time being, he hadn't found the perfect moment to. Not when you were used to relying on him for comfort every time you had a break up. He might not show it, but he absolutely despised all your ex boyfriends, he was jealous too. And listening to your tales of how they treated you, he certainly felt his blood boil. You deserved nothing but queen treatment, and none of your past ventures were treating you like the queen you are.
There's a stifling ache in Yunho's heart, burning all the way to his throat till he's suffocating in the silence he created.
"Come here," you softly tug at his hand, bringing him to the sink, "we'll get this washed first and later we can treat it."
Your attention is focused on his bleeding hand, which showed no signs of stopping any soon. Turning the tap on, you keep his hand under the running water and while the water splashes through, the cut becomes cleaner and devoid of blood. Regardless, it doesn't stop the bleeding.
"Okay, it won't stop bleeding," you grumble, hastily turning the tap off. "What were you thinking, Yunho? How can you be so careless? Oh geez..."
"Hey, it's not that bad, come on." He tries to reassure you, "just slap on a bandaid and it'll be fine."
"It's not going to be fine!" you yell at him, "look at your hand, its like a faucet right now. How do you think a bandaid can stop this?"
You had given your rational and calm thinking to the anxiety; not understanding what to do, you take a step back and stare at him. Helpless. That's what you felt, over a little cut on his finger which won't stop bleeding.
"You're panicking for no reason, Liyah." He sighs, bringing his hand close to his face, "think with a clear mind. Do you have any turmeric with you?"
You nod your head, remembering there's a small jar of turmeric in the back of your condiments cabinet. Quick on your feet, you rush to the cabinet and raise yourself on your tippy toes to open it; once opening it, you scour through it and grab the bottle of turmeric.
"Okay, and?" you stand in front of him, holding the bottle tightly in your hand.
"Take some out and press it gently on my cut," he murmurs, offering you an encouraging smile.
You do as he says, pinching out a little bit of turmeric and pressing it lightly against the cut. The yellow condiment clots with the blood, ceasing the bleed in mere seconds; his hand was still streaked crimson, which was starting to dry on his skin. You should probably tell him to wash it before it leaves a taint behind, but you're too riveted by his hazy smile to let that thought come across your tongue. However what does come to your mind is to bash him for his stupidity.
Taking a breath of relief, you stare at him and groan, "you stupid little jerk! What if it had been serious than that? God..."
"Yeah, even in those circumstances you need to be levelheaded. Panicking won't bring you much satisfaction." He whines, "you wouldn't last a day in nursing school."
You poke your tongue out at him, "I don't need to."
"Silly goose," he mutters under his breath and rolls his eyes.
You were growing too fond of the current situation to retaliate in any way. How often did you get the opportunity to hold his hand? Considering you were best friends there were countless opportunities where you had the chance to. But this was different. Very different from the old times; you were alluded by his eyes to even move away from him. It's not very often that you get caught up like this, with a setting sun, a beautiful gradient of orange and red covering your faces in its sheer glow, and the dithered proximity of nothingness.
Minutes drag by in silence, you didn't want to be the first who moves back, and he didn't want to either. Sullen by the growing darkness, as the sun departs and calls out to the moon to illuminate the world, you're forced to take a step back. You clear your throat, dropping your hands to your side at first, then you timidly tug a few loose strands of your hair behind your ear.
"It's good to know that you care so much," he blurts out of nowhere, heaving out a breath thereafter, "but you really don't need to worry so much about me. Save that worry for someone who actually deserves it."
"Are you saying, you don't?" you prompt, glancing down at the floor; as the moonlight breaks through the window, you're struck by your inviting silhouettes stretching on the floor.
"I'm not," he whispers, "I don't deserve all of it."
"Oh," you drawl, "you don't have to be such a saint, Yunho. I know my heart."
He takes a step closer to you, "so your heart says to worry about me all the time? Does it grieve when I'm in pain? Does it know what my heart feels?"
"Why are you being so difficult to reason with right now?" you muse, wanting to run away from him, because he had taken another step closer to you, "Liyah, do you even know what..."
"It doesn't matter," you shake your head, suffocated by the closeness between you two. "Your wound's better now. I'll make something easy and meet you upstairs. Just—just carry the six pack with you."
Yunho had something to say, but he suppresses every bit of him and watches you head over to the refrigerator. He stands by your side when you pick up the six pack from the refrigerator; without making a sound, he takes it from your hand and leaves you stranded in the kitchen. There you are, alone in the dark with your gruelling afterthoughts on your outburst. Could it even be termed as an outburst?
Whilst you're closing the refrigerator door, your phone buzzes in the back pocket of your shorts. When you bring it out, you're not surprised to receive several texts from your mom.
Mom 🦋🩵 hey i know its really rude of me to keep you alone and you're just back from college... but i dont think i can make it home early i'll try to get out of here as soon as i can though till then, just spend your time with yunho I'm assuming he's still there see you soon, bby lol
You need to tell her that L-O-L means something else; no one uses it to abbreviate "lots of love" anymore. Stifling a laugh, you urge out a groan because now things were about to get even more awkward between you and Yunho. If at least your mom had been here with you, she would've kept you in loop and not made it seem so awkward.
The fate was on your side to ruin your relationship with him, it seems. Because there's no way you would be able to confess your feelings now. Not that you know he doesn't really care or reciprocate to them. How pathetic. You had been hoping for everything to surf the smooth waves, but in reality it was all crashing down like the high tides in the ocean. Could you really see yourself falling into the deep sea, where barren waters are symbolic of your love for him? You weren't sure anymore.
As the night dwindles along with uncertain time, you are making your way upstairs to your room; the way to the rooftop was through your balcony, a short ladder adhered to the adjacent wall which lead up to a plain space amidst the conceding panels of your roof. It was only a flat surface with meagre space, the centre was covered with cozy picnic blanket. Yunho sat by himself, legs crossed and knees to his chest; he stared up at the sky, looking at the array of glimmering stars. His hair moved with the air, the frisky night breeze playing with him and leaving behind tender caresses against his face.
He grows aware of your presence, as you come to sit down next to him. Placing the plate of food between you two, you bring your knees to your chest as well and stare up at the sky; you were mimicking him, his details. A while goes in silence when he sighs and turns to you, his eyes linger on yours before glancing down at the plate between you two.
"P-B-and-Js?" he muses, letting his lips curl by a corner. "Someone settled for easy."
You roll your eyes, "do you want it or not?"
"Of course," he mumbles, picking up a piece from the plate before taking a bite of it. Amidst all, he hands you a beer from the six pack, "you need to catch up with me."
As you take the bottle from his hand, he waves his own, having held it in his other hand; the bottle had been half-empty, impatiently guzzled. You're muddled as you stare at the crown of the bottle, not knowing how to remove it. Yunho breathes out, expressing his annoyance playfully before snatching the bottle out of your hand and giving you his to hold.
"No problemo," he teases, fishing out his car keys from his jeans and propping it right under the crown; with one simple tug, the crown flies off and falls down, leaving the beer to bubble up. "There you go, ma'am."
"Thank you," you mock, taking the bottle from his hand and giving his back. "You have nice tricks up your sleeve."
"Oh, you don't know..." as he trails off, silence settles between you two.
In the ambiguous nightfall, you two are brooding over little things of your life; the past where neither of you had made it obvious you had a thing for each other. Maybe, you did. You made it so obvious for him to catch up on the hints. But Yunho being Yunho, never got around them. In this solitude of quietness, you wonder if you could speak your heart to him. If you could let go of what shackles you and set your heart free. You wanted to tell him everything, what, how and why.
"Stars bring you a sense of wonder, don't they?" he speaks up, glancing at you before looking back up at the stars.
"I believe they remind me how small we are in the vastness of creation, in the space, in the deliberate cosmos," you mumble, biting your lower lip as you take a sip of your beer. "Why do you ask?"
"I don't know," he shrugs lightly, "maybe I'm questioning our existence amid the macrocosm. Or, perhaps I am looking for more profound definitions to our bond."
"We're friends, Yunho," you whisper, wispy and breathless, "we have been close to each other since we could remember."
"What if our destiny had been written in the stars?" he questions, turning fully towards you. "It's not coincidental for us to have everything so perfectly arranged; the stars had to do something with our fates. To intertwine them, to make them..."
You don't say a word, whiling in the serenity of arrant obscurity. The light booze was bitter on your tongue, but not as bitter as the words you had trapped.
"Are you instigating something, Yunho?" you guzzle a good amount of beer before picking out a piece of sandwich.
"Maybe I am," his eyes were fixated on you, reading every minute movement, "do you understand what I'm trying to say?"
You turn to face him, mouth full with the bite of sandwich you took, and your eyes seemingly teary. There's something in the way he was looking at you, plump lips trembling in an attempt to get the remaining words out of his mouth, but he did not make a sound. You were too eager to hear him speak; continue with the conundrum he had brought up.
Was he the one confessing?
Was he the first to do so?
So, he does reciprocate your feelings, doesn't he?
"Liyah, I—"
Ping! Ping! Ping!
Your phone rings out loud, alerting you of the incoming texts; you flinch, pulling yourself away from Yunho and taking your phone out from the pocket of your shorts. Caught in a daze, you read the texts you had received.
Song Mingi.
What did he want now?
You open your chats with him and go through the texts.
Mingi 🎀 hey! heard you're back in town why didn't you call me? anyway, since you're back are you free right now? the couple of us are going cliff diving you know, by the abandoned railway line let me know you're in san gets cranky when he doesn't have a total headcount. :)
You quickly reply back to him.
You sure! who else is gonna be there?
You get an immediate response from him.
Mingi 🎀 san, me, alexis, chris felix and jiyeon maybe and yunho... he's with you right? can you ask him? i texted him hours ago he hasn't responded yet
You glance at Yunho and then back at your blaring screen; though, you weren't feeling all too well noticing Yunho shift his attention from you to the stars.
You i'll drag him with me if I have to don't worry we'll be there where do we meet?
Mingi 🎀 oh, everyone's bringing their own cars so i think it's better if we meet directly at the spot leave soon! we're already on our way there. see you shortly bye xoxo
You alright!
You put your phone back inside your pocket, and then proceed to put the half-eaten sandwich back in the plate; tapping Yunho's shoulder lightly, you get his attention.
"Who was it?" he asks, taking a swig of his beer.
"Mingi," you add, "he's invited us to cliff diving." You gulp the remaining bit of your beer and wince, "where's your phone? He's complaining that you aren't paying him enough attention."
"Ah, that dick," he curses under his breath and hastily pulls out his phone from the pocket of his jeans. "My phone has been on silent from the morning."
He goes through his text messages while you finish your beer and place the empty bottle down. "Did you say yes to that?"
"Yeah, why not?" you shrug, "cliff diving sounds really fun. Come on, we should leave already."
Getting on your feet carefully, you dust your the back of shorts unconsciously and as you are about to leave, Yunho sneaks up from behind. One hand on your shoulder, other holding the bottle of beer, he takes a gulp of the drink before murmuring, "are you sure you want to go? It won't be awkward for you with Mingi there?"
You chuckle, "Mingi and I are okay. We're out of the awkward phase."
"Alright," he murmurs and finishes his beer.
Dropping his hand from your shoulder, he follows you back downstairs; the six pack and plate of food are still lying on the rooftop, while the two of you are in the living room. Yunho picks up his abandoned jacket from the couch's armrest and shrugs it on. You do the same, draping the kimono on your shoulders, the one you had taken off after coming home. Meeting with the chilly air outside, you walk to your car parked in the driveway, but Yunho stops you.
"Let's take my car," he suggests, nudging his head in the direction of his house.
"Fine by me." You shrug and pout, finding no harm in the suggestion.
On the way over to his house, Yunho pulls you close to his side by hooking his arm around your shoulder. Your feet fall in synch as you take long strides together; past the broad metal gates of his house, you're strolling on the yellow bricked promenade surrounded by lush bushes, seemingly of flowers which release their heavenly scent at night. The night bloomers, if that thing even exists. You're swayed to the musky undertones of Yunho's scent and the mirth of the grass, not understanding what was happening in your heart or your mind.
For one moment you and Yunho are on the brink of confessing your feelings for each other and the next you're taking a step back and pretending to be okay. Does that even make sense to you? Because it wouldn't make sense to anyone else.
Yunho rubs circles on your shoulders, rubbing his hand thereafter. "It seems like we have a lot of unresolved things to talk about. We'll deal with them later, right?"
You nod, humming along. "Maybe those things don't need resolving. Maybe we just need to be upfront."
"Maybe we do." He mumbles under his breath and once you've gotten close to the garage, he lets go of you.
Standing at a distance, you hug yourself to prevent the cold from seeping in your heart. The gelid breeze of the night is known to be exuberant. You wait for Yunho to bring the car outside, somewhat lost in the meagre revels this night has to offer. The roar of a car's engine reverberates, snapping you out of your reverie to find yourself staring at Yunho's car. He flashes you a worried look before nudging his head at you; taking the sign, you hasten yourself to settle in the passenger's seat.
"You're zoning out awfully lot, Liyah," Yunho states while you buckle yourself in. "Are you sure you're okay?"
"I'm fine, Yunho," you assure him, slightly irked by his constant worry. "Let's go, we don't want to make them wait."
Yunho sighs, as if he had given up on you, "okay."
The drive is lot quieter than it would've been if you hadn't ticked off Yunho. Well to say in the least, you both were not in the mood to speak anything at all. The radio was too loud any way, you did not need the silence to be filled with useless babbles. You're staring out of the window, watching the trees pass you by as the night approaches a new beginning. Distant landscapes of open fields and mountains soon disintegrate to a dense forest; the valley starts off from this point on, where the abandoned railway bridge levitates over a lake.
When you find the cluster of cars parked in a small open space, Yunho slows down and pulls his own in line. Killing the engine, he gets the keys out and unlocks the doors. You get out without hesitation or even waiting for Yunho. The nightly air carries a sublime scent of earth and sod, while you're hugging your chest and straying away from Yunho. You could hear the distant chatters accompanied by laughter.
The trees only start growing in number, forming thickets and engulfing everything in their darkness. You find your group of friends standing under a giant elm tree; there were exactly the people who Mingi had mentioned before. San, Chris, Felix, Alexis and Jiyeon, engaged in a conversation led by Mingi. They're standing in a circle, dispersed away from each other; San and Chris had a smoke in between their lips, it made sense why the others maintained distance from them.
Your feet crunch on the dried foliage, hailing their attentions to you as you walk past to stand next to Mingi. The pink haired man offers you a small smile, a curve soon vanishing as he glances in your direction to find Yunho swaying along. Mingi doesn't wait until his best friend is closer to him, he sprints in enthusiasm and hugs the man he had been waiting for. The two share a gripping embrace, while the others engage with you.
To say you missed them, it would be an understatement. All of the ones present here, except for Mingi, left the town to find better opportunities for themselves. Everyone is in different cities now, some studying, some having full time jobs. Your eyes lurk around, rummaging from face to face. San hasn't changed a bit, he was still the guy who loved to dress in all black; he wore a black shirt and black pants, heavy platforms on his feet while his tattoos peeked out from under the sleeve of his shirt. Chris and Felix had a contrasting appearance to them from the last time you had seen them; Chris has gotten buff and toned, his arms bulging and flexing under the cutout shirt he wore, even his thighs were insanely toned under the denim shorts. Felix is still the cute little guy, still wearing his jumpers. Jiyeon is still conservative, having her body covered from head to toe with a maxi dress and as usual, Alexis is being the fashion icon that she is, dressed in chic clothes; a crop top and shorts, exposing as much skin as she could.
"We almost thought you wouldn't come," San begins, blowing out a cloud of white smoke.
Jiyeon follows after, "considering you and Mingi shared that night together, you know the night of our graduation party."
You roll your eyes, slapping your hand on her back as she was on your right, "do you have to bring it up?"
"Yeah, maybe nothing happened between them," Alexis blurts, but then glances at you, "what?"
"Nothing really happened between us." You state.
"Oh, come on, Liyah," Chris says with his thick accent, "everyone has been talking about you two since that night. The town needs gossip."
Felix rolls his eyes, "this town is a deadbeat place, all of us left for a reason."
"Yeah, to seek more opportunities." Mingi crawls back to the circle, Yunho behind him by a few steps. "The town is not a deadbeat town. You guys were obsessed with the idea of leaving."
"Yeah, homie," San chimes, "you stayed back because of your family quarry."
"Do you have any wild animals there?" Jiyeon asks, curiosity peaking in her tone.
"A few bears, a passal of boars, and a herd of antelopes." Mingi puts into words, "the hunting season will start after the summer camp ends."
"Ooh, hunting. Sounds fun," Chris cheers, throwing his burning cigarette down on the ground and stomping on it. "Count me in for that."
"Is it even safe—"
"—hey, Yunho!" Alexis's scream interrupts you, and you watch the said woman leaping into Yunho's arms for an uncalled hug.
Not cool.
Mingi comes to stand next to you, hugging you sideways. It catches you off guard, but you settle into his touch as the seconds pass. Well, you needed it. Because you were bubbling with jealousy as Alexis and Yunho hug. You clear your throat loudly, forcing the two to break their embrace and while they do step back, they start exchanging remarks. Flirty remarks.
Alexis squeezes his arms, "someone's been working out."
Yunho scratches the back of his neck and waves her off. "Not as much working out as lifting manikins for classes."
"You're still doing great," she replies, using her high-pitched giggle. "Speaking of which, how's the college treating you?"
They're lost in a conversation while you're bitterly biting back on your tongue to prevent yourself from cursing someone out. Mingi's arm gets tighter around your shoulder and tugs you close to his body.
You grumble, "she has no reason to stick to him like that."
"And you have no reason to be jealous," San mumbles, interjecting in Mingi's thoughts; he puts out his cigarette by throwing it down and stomping on it.
"He's right," Mingi shrugs, "we know you like Yunho. But he doesn't. There's nothing official between you two, so he's liable for some harmless flirting."
Jiyeon pipes in, "if you ask me, Liyah took too much time to understand her own feelings. You can't be attracted to someone out of nowhere. Either you always are, or you're just blinded by lust."
"Jiyeon makes sense," Felix gives you his two cents, "time waits for none, Liyah. If you had the guts to tell him how you felt on the night of our graduation party...who knows, you might've been together now."
"Why are we yapping, guys?" Chris groans, "Liyah's relationship problems only get worse when they're discussed. We're here to dive. And I don't want to waste my night solving some broken lovers' quarrel."
"I would have to agree with this counterpart," Felix mutters, "before the night gets too dark and ambiguous for us, let's just do what we came here to do."
"See, I told you, no one has any business discussing my issues with Yunho," you grumble, taking a step ahead, "I'm here for a nice swim and nothing else."
Mingi follows in your steps, San and Jiyeon do too; Chris and Felix are behind you all, while Yunho and Alexis are the last ones to be in your pursuit. The walk to the bridge was short, merely spanning for about ten minutes; the railway tracks are buried deep in the count, covered with moss and creepers now. Over the seasons, this place gets denser and thicker, one cannot discern a proper path and might get lost.
The moisture laden air hits your face first, dissipating your jealousy as along the walk you couldn't help but think about Yunho and Alexis at the back, flirting and touching.
Mingi places his hand on your shoulder, "race you to the beams?"
You smirk and spring on your feet, running before he could; the beams were these two broad metal bars holding the front of the bridge, these spanned the entire bridge, adhering and supporting the structure over the water. The rusted beams leave a streak of red on your hand when you touch it, while teasing Mingi with your tongue. Others are right behind you, leisurely strolling.
"Wanna go first?" Mingi asks, pulling his graphic tee over his head and leaving him bare; his body was still drool worthy, having a small crescent moon tattooed on his chest.
He gets out of his pants, exposing himself in snug briefs which outlines his cock all too well. Slipping out of his shoes and socks, he makes sure to not step on any gravel under him. He tugs at the waistband of his briefs, and then extends his hand toward you; patiently waiting for you to take it in yours.
You smile at him, smugly. Ridding yourself off your sandals, kimono, camisole, and your shorts, you stand next to him partially naked. Ignoring the low sounding whistles directed at you, it was probably Chris or someone else; although, you were hoping Yunho had caught up on you and your figure, that is if he wasn't busy entertaining Alexis. It was a good day to choose matching lacy underwear, the material flimsy and a little see-through to show off how beautiful your body is. Wind cuts to your skin, suddenly feeling cold; you take Mingi's hand in yours and he leads along the track. In the moment, you're least bothered about the others, only focusing on your hand laced with Mingi's.
He guides you over a wide barricade, making you take a short leap before you're carefully tiptoeing on the narrow edge hanging over the large water body. Your heart palpitates in your chest, falling into your gut as the adrenaline kicks in. The distance between the bridge and the lake aren't much, just enough for your body to spiral down into the depth; around 25 feet maybe.
Mingi squeezes your hand tightly, getting your attention. "On the count of three."
You nod.
"One."
"Two."
"Three."
As the last count echos in your mind, you jump. The support from beneath your feet slipping off, now an empty void of anticipation; you're falling down with Mingi, wind brushing against your body to resist the fall. In the whiling seconds, you come in contact with the frigid barrier of water, then your body submerges inside. Water envelopes you all around, burying you in splintering waves of coldness. You hadn't realised when your hand had slipped off of Mingi's grip, not that it mattered now. Cold currents bubble around you when you swim up to the surface, finding Mingi only a few meters away from you.
Your wet hair sticks close to your skin and face, framing along your cheeks as you try to push away most of it from your eyes. Mingi's hair is in the same condition; he adorns a wide smile on his lips, eyes blinking away the remaining water while he swims closer to you. The warmth of his body captures yours in a gentle touch, arms entwined in your waist, and his face only inches away.
You're laughing, giggling, the sound itself mellifluous to his ears. Clinging onto him, he somehow manages to keep the two of you afloat. In your unconscious state, you wrap your legs around his waist, pushing yourself into his chest.
"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" he asks you, rubbing his thumbs into the small of your back.
"Making Yunho jealous?"
He juts his lower lip out. "If you're comfortable with it."
"I think we're already making him jealous."
You glance over your shoulder, tilting your head to look up above; the vast distance doesn't let you discern anything happening on the bridge, yet it brings you a new high of exhilaration thinking about making Yunho envious of you and Mingi. A few more minutes pass and Mingi swims both of you away from the point of impact. More chaos is heard above on the bridge, and with your curiosity bursting apart at the seams, you glance up again to find two silhouettes jumping down.
Splash!
The water around them makes a big splatter, creating waves along the way; when the two shirtless figures resurface, you catch a glint of Chris's lip ring and a glimpse of Felix's blond hair. The two of them are quick to swim toward you two, their laughter echoing across the silent cosmos of forest and the night.
"Fuck, that was incredible," Chris remarks, brushing his hair away from his face.
"Agreed," Felix adds, a little out of breath.
Mingi holds you tighter to him and you realise he had started to lose his hold on you. "I think me and Liyah are going to swim to the shore."
"Yeah, wait for us. I don't think I have enough guts to do this a second time," Felix sputters, spitting out a mouthful of water.
"You're no fun, Felix." Chris comments, and he's interrupted by couple of yells.
Jiyeon and San were next, followed by Yunho and Alexis when a long beat passes; you were still strapped to Mingi's waist, and realising you had been weighing him down, you take the effort to push yourself off of him and remain solitary. Even so, Mingi stays close by you, trying to support you to stay afloat. Water sloshes even more when Jiyeon and San join you all. Jiyeon comes up for air, coughing out water and slicking her hair back; San is right behind her, snickering deeply as though he was enjoying himself.
"I am never letting you guys talk me into anything like this!" Jiyeon complains, her hair clinging to her face.
San heaves out a chuckle, grabbing her by the shoulders and pushing her down in the water. Jiyeon is taken off guard, and as she comes back on the surface, courtesy of San to pull her back up, she gasps for air, panting and coughing.
"You're—you're fucking dead Choi San." She aims a punch at him, and it lands perfectly against his shoulder.
"What, it was fun! You should step out of your comfort zone more often, Ji." San dodges a couple of punches until she stops; Jiyeon was shivering.
Yunho and Alexis were swimming side by side, listening to the two make a chaos. Your eyes had never left Yunho in that moment, the second he and Alexis resurfaced, you couldn't stop staring at him. Shirtless, his skin glimmered against the moonlight, the water coated his skin in a thin sheet while his ashen blue hair was drenched and stuck to his forehead. He tries to pick at a few strands, pushing them away to expose his forehead. Panting softly, he lets a smile stretch his lips. Though when his eyes landing on you and Mingi, his smile disappears.
"Don't tease her, Sannie," Alexis groans, "if you like her so much, just be straightforward. All the teasing is too old school."
Jiyeon's cheeks turn red, striking vividly under the moonlight. "Shut up, Alexis."
"Maybe she has a point," Yunho adds, "the teasing and mocking tactic is useless with girls now. They need men who are more candid."
Chris chortles, "we all know how straightforward you've been, Yun. Maybe a little too much to have a reputation around high school."
"Oh please," Yunho retorts, laughing along with him, "girls practically threw themselves at me, then."
"And you were a man with principles to not let their efforts be vain." Mingi mumbles, nonchalantly.
"Come on, guys," you chime in, a smile curling your lips, "we all know who had a reputation in high school. So, pinpointing Yunho isn't proving anything. Especially you, Chris."
"Miss congeniality is at her man's rescue again." Chris replies, rolling his eyes at you.
"Hey, leave it, Chris." Yunho speaks up, leaning back into the water, "it's a beautiful night, why ruin it on something so trivial. Let's put our differences aside for a night, huh?"
Mingi agrees, "yeah, I'm with him on this. We're all seeing each other after what, months? Weeks? Years? It'd be stupid to argue anyway."
"I think the bonding can happen out of the water too, because I'm not staying in here for a long time," you add, and earn a couple of hums in response; Alexis, Jiyeon and Felix had agreed to you.
And to your unbridled surprise, they are the first ones to swim towards the shore. There isn't much distance between you and the shore. From your better judgement, it must be, give or take, 10 metres from where you were. Hurtling a soft squeak, you begin swimming away from your group of friends. Mingi is right next to you, paddling through the water; when the water starts shallowing you out, you know you've reached the grimly edge of the landmass extending into the lake. You pace yourself and get on your feet, skimming over the washed borderline and stepping on the gravel.
"Definitely refreshing." You remark, smiling at Mingi who's walking out of the water.
"What else would you need on a summer night?" he chortles, stretching his arms over his head, "do you wanna go again?"
"I wish," you sigh, shuffling your hair to get some water out, "I don't want to catch a cold."
"Understandable," he mutters.
"I'm never trusting you ever again, Mingi." Jiyeon scoffs, "this was dangerous. Way dangerous. What if the water was infested with crocodiles? Or um, snakes? Had you given it any thought before dragging us here?"
"Oh, please," Felix pipes in, "it's a small lake, it can't be that bad."
Alexis giggles, "lakes can be a home for many creatures; snakes are one of them."
"Oh, my lord," Jiyeon groans, "I'm going to kill San."
"So, I'm thinking you're not going to stay around for long?" Alexis instigates and Jiyeon nods her head, crossing her arms over her chest, "I'm not. And neither is San."
"May gods bless thee," Mingi mocks, rubbing his hand over his face, "what about you, Liyah? Staying for another round?"
"I actually don't want to..." you trail off, eyeing behind him as Yunho walks out of the water, followed by Chris and San. "But I was here with Yunho, and I don't think he'd want to leave any sooner."
"I can drop you off," Mingi shrugs, stepping close to you.
"Drop who off?" Yunho repeats, shaking his head like a puppy to get rid of the water in his hair.
Alexis streamlines to his side, subtly, however. Yunho doesn't pay her any mind for the time being, his attention solely focused on you and Mingi. You couldn't concentrate on the matter at hand because you were too distracted by Yunho's bare figure; his body wasn't as buff as Chris or Mingi, or even San for that matter, but he was well built at places he should be. For some reason, you couldn't quite take your eyes off his body, his lower half precisely. The way his briefs stuck to his thighs and crotch, defined the very vague details of his cock. At least now you know what the girls in high school had been talking about, all those rumours of him being 'huge' were starting to reappear in your mind. And you could say, those were no rumours. Those were facts.
"Oh, Liyah wants to go home." Mingi replies, bringing you out of your daze, "since she came with you..."
You step in, feeling the need to be clearer and firmer, "well it seems like you want to stay here for a little longer and I don't want to ruin it for you."
"I can leave with you if you want," Yunho deadpans.
"No, it's fine," you mutter, eyes glazing over Alexis who was now shooting you daggers with her own, "you're meeting everyone after a long time. Might as well enjoy that while it lasts. Mingi already offered, so it's really fine."
"Yeah, we aren't staying around either," Jiyeon scowls, stomping over to San and grabbing him by his arm, "you're leaving with me. And dare if you invite me back for something stupid like this, again."
"Okay, ma'am," San offers a two-finger salute as she drags him along by the arm; he looks over his shoulder and frowns, "I gotta go, homies. Have more fun in my stead."
Jiyeon rolls her eyes at his dramatic speech. Felix catches up with the two and informs us, turning around for a mere second. "This was fun guys, but I think I'll leave too. Don't go too crazy."
"Are you sure you want to be a third wheel between them?" Chris questions, stroking his lower lip to adjust his lip ring.
Felix rolls his eyes and blows a raspberry, giving him a thumbs down. You shift in your place and tug on Mingi's hand, "I think we should leave too."
Mingi nods, looking down at you, "sure." he then turns to others, "be careful, lads."
"We're hiking back up with you, dodo." Alexis rolls her eyes, pushing herself close to Yunho's side; she let her chest brush against his back, eventually she takes his arm in her hold and drags him ahead.
Finding Yunho's gaze fixated on you while he stumbles on his feet along her, the suffocation in the pit of your stomach rises. You wonder what he was thinking, or if he was simply acting out on his jealousy. Though when you look at him sticking to Alexis like that, all your sentiments regarding him, shatter to pieces. While a tinge of envy does arise in your heart, it also brings you a little peace knowing, you had somewhat managed to make him jealous too. An eye for an eye. Only you were waiting for the time when both of you would go blind.
Mingi wraps his arm around your shoulders and pulls you with him. His warmth is a little treat to yourself, and his presence was your saving grace. You and Mingi were good friends, not as good as you were with Yunho, but you were getting there. As said before, you and Mingi did share a good time together on the night of your graduation party. Something which you had kept under the wraps to prevent your friends from gossiping, or overall prevent Yunho from knowing about it. No matter how hard you tried to hide it, Yunho couldn't fully give his doubts away. He kept suspecting you and Mingi for a few months, until he let go of it in all and moved on from his silly suspicions.
After hiking up the small, elevated terrain to the parking spot, barefoot and wet, you find San, Jiyeon and Felix drying themselves off to the wind. They have their clothes strewn on the trunk of San's car. Jiyeon shivers slightly, coming her hand through her wet hair. Felix and San are busy in a conversation, least bothered about the gauzy cold. In a haste, Chris walks over from behind you and stumbles to his car; he opens the driver's door and pulls out a pack of cigarettes from the side pockets on the door.
So he was a smoker, now. Great.
"I'll go get our clothes. Wait here." Mingi smiles at you, leaving you by his car and disappearing down the inscrutable tracks.
You lean against the trunk of his car, arms over your chest, contemplating and agonisingly listening to Alexis use her pitched voice to flirt with Yunho. Her secondhand compliments were giving you secondhand embarrassment. How can Yunho even tolerate her? Maybe he was too distracted by the way her tits were spilling out of her bra. And you couldn't give a fuck. It's ironic, isn't it? He was minutes away from confessing his feelings for you and now he's sticking to someone who's not. And it all happened because you were too proud in your ways to dally with him.
"Anyone wants to join us for late night dinner?" San announces, "we're going to Amelia's."
Chris raises his hand, "count me in."
Felix retorts, "I thought you were prepared for a round two of diving."
"Maybe now I'm having second thoughts." He blows out a smoke and slams the car door shut. "I wouldn't mind going for a bite."
Yunho shrugs, "me too. All that swimming famished me. And I cannot resist Amelia's deli sandwich."
"Count me in too," Alexis sings, "we both have a lot of catching up to do, don't we?" she bats her lashes at Yunho, who smiles down at her, whispering, "of course, we do. And we need to test all the things you've been texting me."
You don't catch on the very last of his words as they get too inaudible to perceive, but from the smirk on his face, you knew he had double intentions to it.
"What about you, Liyah?" Jiyeon asks and you shake your head, "I'll have to take a rain check. It's just that I'm not hungry. I just want to jump in my bed and knock myself out."
Till the time you reply to her, Mingi comes back with both of your clothes and your sandals. He already had his shoes on when you glance at his feet. "What are you guys talking about?"
"Going to Amelia's, wanna join?" Chris says.
Mingi waves his free hand in the air, "sounds fun, but I don't think I can tolerate that place anymore. You guys can go."
"Alright," Jiyeon mumbles, "so, you and Liyah aren't coming with us..."
Alexis takes on the hint, "they probably want to get busy for the night."
"A late night check in at the hotel vag. Nice work, Mingi." San quips.
Mingi rolls his eyes, "think whatch'ya wanna."
Your flustered cheeks leave no room for others to think of the obvious, or whatever that had been cooking in their heads; Yunho, however, wasn't too impressed by anyone's remarks, neither was he too fond your cherry glazed cheeks. He wasn't the reason why you were blushing; it was Mingi. His ego doesn't let him believe it.
Mingi ignores the low sounding hoots from his friends and hands you your clothes, the camisole and shorts, alongside your kimono. Your lingerie was still drenched in water, and it would be more sensible if you remove them before wearing your clothes. He puts your sandals in front of your feet, and you slip into them easily; keeping the clothes on his car's trunk, you glance at Mingi with hesitance and then clear your throat.
"Do you have anything to cover me while I... you know...get rid of my wet underwear?" you whisper to him, keeping your words between the two of you only. Not that you were worried about other's overhearing you, because they were too engrossed in themselves to be bothered about you two anymore.
Without saying anything, Mingi goes around his car and pulls out the passenger's door; he has a black jacket slung on his forearm as he makes his way back to you.
"Would this work?"
"Sure." You tell him, "just hold it up, I'll change behind it."
Mingi's cheeks turn red, visibly red. "Are you sure you want me to do it and not..."
"He's busy wooing Alexis for the night, so..." you walk to the front of the car, where one side of it was shrouded with darkness and dense branches of trees.
Mingi does as you suggest him to, holding his oversized jacket up to create a curtain for you to change behind it. You quickly get out of the wet bra and panties, and pull your camisole over your head, then the shorts follow. It feels eldritch at first to wear your clothes without your underwear, but you had no other choice but to. Once you settle into it, there's no awkwardness against your skin, and you tell Mingi to lower the jacket. The man had his eyes closed and head turned at all times, showing off his gentlemanliness.
"That was fast," he continues, "for your information, I wasn't looking at all."
"That's fine, Mingi." You laugh and walk past him.
He's right behind you, "but I think you still have a little bit of issue?"
You glance down at your camisole to find your nipples hard and poking through the soft material. "Oops, I actually do."
Mingi gives you his jacket, without hesitating. "Put it on. I'll be back soon."
You shrug his jacket over. It reeked of his scent, a little bit of nicotine and cinnamon musk. The jacket covered almost everything of you, reaching till your mid thighs. It kept you warm, maybe a little warmer than you had liked it to be. Joining the others, you stand next to Jiyeon, waiting for Mingi as he changes into his clothes where you had changed.
"Ooh, Mingi's jacket, isn't it?" Jiyeon teases, noticing you standing next to her.
You scoff, "it's not what you think."
Unconsciously or consciously, your eyes scatter in search of Yunho amongst the familiar faces. He's not there, neither is Alexis. Your stomach rumbles with jealousy, only a little.
"Don't look for him, he's not here," Chris slurred his words.
"Him and Alexis have gone to bring their clothes and stuff," San shrugs, "are you trying to make him jealous, Liyah?"
"Me? Jealous? Me making him jealous? Oh please," you roll your eyes, scoffing.
"Just thought, because he's been riling you up for nothing; him and Alexis are getting on your nerves it seems." San adds.
Mingi whistles along, marking his presence next to you and while he does, Yunho and Alexis walk out of the dark, hand in hand, both smiling at each other for some apparent reason. You twist your nose and look away, turning yourself to Mingi, you cling by his arm and bury it in between your tits. Mingi is obviously taken back by your stern action, and so does it catch Yunho and the other's off guard.
"Let's go, Mingi," you pout, looking up at him, "we should leave. I'm cold and I want to take a nice warm shower with you."
San rolls his eyes. Chris scoffs. Jiyeon snickers. And Felix curses under his breath, annoyed by your act. They all knew you were pretending and playing along. But Yunho didn't. He believed every word you said and clenched his jaw, tight enough for his cheek to twitch. Alexis was on the same boat as him, believing your frolicsome ruse.
Mingi clears his throat, tugging a few strands of your hair behind your ear and lets his eyes linger on you. It was driving him insane to not do anything at this moment, because somewhere along the lines, he never stopped liking you. He was ready to compromise his silly love for you, all for yours and Yunho's sake.
It takes a minute for Mingi to form his words. "Eager, aren't we?"
"Oh come on, you silly." you slap his chest, playfully, yet Mingi yelps in pain. "We've got a lot of catching up to do and let's be honest, it's not going to happen while we're still here."
"You're right about that," he chimes, looking up, "we'll see you guys later, or at the summer camp. Don't forget, you guys gave me your names for volunteering. Don't back out now, or else there'll be consequences." Mingi warns them, earning a round of groans and whines.
Mingi slips one of his hands around your waist and hides you to his car; San yells out from behind, "wear a glove when making love!"
You could clearly hear Yunho scoff amid the teasing from your friends, but you choose not to react to it. You're suppressing your queasy emotions to yourself, bottling them quite nicely as you get in Mingi's car and strap yourself in. The engine roars when Mingi revives it and pulls out of the parked space.
The ride along with Mingi isn't quiet, no, not at all. Passing by the night of crippling elation, and unsaid judgments, you stare out of the window and ponder. You stole a few glances from Mingi, who hummed an unsung melody under his breath. The chunky rings on his thumbs and fingers, tapped an obscure tune on the steering, an addition to his dilly dally singing. You both had things to say, many more feelings to state and confide, yet you were caught up amid a war of who'd be the first to go.
Mingi clears his throat, "is he still so oblivious or chooses to play dumb?"
You groan, softly in your mind thinking about Yunho and his stupidity. "I don't know, Min! He can't be so blind to all the times I've came through for him."
"So, you think he chooses to play dumb?"
"Maybe, he thinks we don't have a future," you mumble, turning to face him, "and maybe he is right. We can't even be sure of the present to talk about our future. We push and pull, and we'll continue pushing and pulling until one of us breaks and blurts out everything."
Mingi tries to figure out how he would respond to your said comments. In actuality, he had the same idea about the two of you.
He sighs, "you have to take a stand, Liyah. Let him know."
"I know."
And the night dissolves your mind in the haphazard nonchalance of nothingness.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆
             Five days volunteering at the summer camp, and you were drained. It wasn't easy looking after kids, they're moody, picky eaters, and rebels. Though for some contemplative reasons, your experience with the kids wasn't as bad as it was with Yunho. In the sheer curiosity of nature, you were left alone; speaking in simpler terms, you and Yunho had a rift between each other, leading to no interactions over the span of this summer camp. You spent most of your time volunteering anyway, so it didn't matter. Not exactly when you also had Mingi's assistance to you for every little thing.
You and Mingi had bonded over the time, it would be the same with you and the others. Talking to your fellow friends, you come to learn how they were handling their lives. Jiyeon is working part time with an animal rescue NGO. San has dropped out of college and chose to be on a professional parkour team. Chris continues to be a menace in his medical school. Felix is an artist's understudy and manages his studies at the art school. And Alexis is pursuing her long-lost passion for being a fashion designer. They're all busy in their lives, headed for the future and passionate about their careers. Catching up with them would be the best moment of coming back here.
"And last summer, she wore my designed outfit!" Alexis chimes in full excitement. "You know, that's when I felt accomplished as a fashion designer."
"It's one of the most famous music artists in our country right now, I wouldn't second guess your happiness." Yunho compliments her, hugging her close to his body.
As the day had passed, all the kids were back to their homes, and as you had time to spare, Mingi suggested ending the night on a jovial note. The night dragged on to be a beautiful one with a full moon high struck in the sky, and what is better than a campfire to spend such an alluring night? You were all sitting in circles, surrounding the fiery pit of fire, the scent of burning wood nuzzling into your nose and the warmth of the fire settling into your skin. The fire crackles far too often, dissipating in the mellow undertones of your chatters. On the scattered logs, you sat next to Mingi; there were two people on each log. Chris and Felix were together, Jiyeon and San were snuggling up right next to you and Mingi, and Yunho and Alexis were sitting opposite to you two. There were other volunteers too; the eccentric teens of the town had left early, leaving your group of friends to luxuriate in the night.
Rising flames of the fire interrupted most my view, but not much. You could catch the glimpses of Yunho and Alexis being touchy and feely, some part of you absolutely despised it while the other waited around for everything to unfold. Mingi gave you solidarity, supporting your crazy notions as the time rolled around. Jiyeon and San were acting very much like a couple; it's not surprising considering they moved to the same city, rent a same apartment, and live together. It was bound to happen one way or another. Chris and Felix did not disclose their love life just yet, not that you know of.
"It was the best feeling ever," Alexis sings, adjusting herself by Yunho's side.
Yunho lets her do as she pleases; he wraps his arm around her waist to pull her close; their bodies seemed to be conjoined and it did not bode well with you.
Yunho chuckles, "of course, it was..."
Their voices die to mere whispers in your mind, you're too fixated on Mingi's feeble attempts at easing you out. He rubbed circles on the curve of your back, his warmth was more intense than compared to the fire in front of you; but seemingly you had started to burn for a completely different reason.
"You have to do something, Liyah." Mingi speaks up, "you can't let her win. Alexis only wants to parade Yunho around for her own sake. He's a trophy wife for her."
"You think I don't know that Mingi?" you bark, taking him off guard. Your aggression wasn't limited to yourself anymore, it was directed at Yunho too. "No one can love him like I do."
He pulls you in for a side hug, embracing your body with his as he leans his head on yours. Pushing you against his chest, he brings his hand to stroke through your hair.
"I know that." He mumbles, "everyone here knows that. Except for him. He's a blind dick, just be upfront with him."
You raise your head from his chest and deadpan, "geez, I never thought of that. Thanks a lot, Mingi."
"Happy to help," he replies back, catching up on your satire. "I'm being serious though. Ask him to meet you at your—oh no..."
Mingi's eyes had been trained on you, but when he takes them off, only for a second, he's met with a catastrophic happening. Brazen and curious, you nudge your neck in the direction his eyes were stuck in. And the ground under your feet opens wide, ready to swallow you.
Yunho and Alexis were kissing. Yes. They were swallowing each other's mouth, and it was a sight you couldn't bear. So, you do what any sensible woman would do, after seeing her crush kissing someone who's not her. You storm off. You run away. You're quick on your feet, untwining Mingi's arms from you and scurrying off into the wild dark. Mingi's protests aren't enough to stop, neither are the silent ones coming from others; you're scampering in your boots to get away from the campfire spot as fast as you could. Only, you hadn't realise that someone else had followed you right after.
For the first time in his years of friendship with you, Yunho was feeling utterly helpless. Disappointing you was never on his list; he didn't want to let you down either. He didn't think he'd break your heart by playing a wicked game of push and pull. He took it too far. Obviously. In the middle of the dense forest, he's in your pursuit; his feet are in synch with yours, but his pace makes him fall behind. He was listening to you sob and sniffle and to him, those were the most vulnerable sounds he had ever heard from you.
"Liyah, wait!" he yells, and you slow down.
Walking on the graveled ground, a path leading to the set of cabins situated at distance from each other, you stop and turn. You find him behind you, right behind you. Remorse evident in his eyes, and his lips quivering; you couldn't bear to see him like that. Never in your years of friendship had you seen him like that. The happy go lucky guy had a frown on his face, tears in his eyes, and guilt painted all over his skin. Of course, you'd be astonished to find him in such condition.
Moonlight breaks through the branches of the tall trees around you, the scent of mildew and moss spreading to the moisture baring air; his face shrouded with darkness, lights up when he steps into one of the moonbeams. And he's breathtaking. He always was.
"What do you want, Yunho?" you spit, spitefully.
"Can we talk?"
"I don't want to talk to you," you state and turn on your heels, ready to storm off again.
Though, before you could even take a step ahead, you're pulled back into something hard; a tight grip on your wrist burns through your skin and constraints any movement from you.
"What?" you gasp, peeking through your squinted eyes to find Yunho's staring right into yours.
You're pressed up against his chest, cheeks turning red when you realise how close you two were. There hadn't been a time where you were so close to each other. With how blatantly the proximity had dithered between you two, you couldn't think straight. Even so, you try to snatch your hand away from his grasp, wanting to be free of his hold. He doesn't let you, he doesn't even budge when you're using all your strength to get his hand off your wrist; you started clawing at his hand, but that didn't work either.
"I told you I don't want to talk to you," you state, firmly.
"But I want to." He whispers, "please, hear me out."
You press your lips together, letting your hand fall down to your side; his skin broke with your nail marks, blood clotting under, waiting to ooze out. Time stands still here, amid the inky phases of your heart; forest speaks of nothing, no sound at all, letting your hearts beating in the while. As the clouds shift against the nightly breeze, the moon hits your faces, lighting up your eyes.
"Okay," you mutter, "I'll hear you out."
He clears his throat and let's go of your hand. Taking a step back from you, he runs a hand through his hair, which falls disheveled on his forehead. Accustomed to his growing silence, you have half a mind of turning away and sprinting back to your cabin.
"What you saw with—what you saw with Alexis, it wasn't my—"
You interrupt him, "it wasn't your fault. I get it. She was the one who came onto you. You had no hand in this..." he looks less guilty hearing you, so you add, "don't bullshit me, Yunho. It always takes two—takes two. Neither of you are innocent."
As your voice breaks, the light in Yunho's eyes starts dwindling down. "Liyah, please..."
"What, Yunho?" you sniff and tears well in your eyes, "you want to justify your behaviour? You want to validate how you feel about me? What do you want?"
Being pushed past your limits, you shake your head and close your eyes shut; turning on your heels, you stride down the vague path leading to the cabins where you were staying in. You must've taken a couple of steps ahead, about to take another when your world spins around; it only stops when you're pushed up against a nearby tree. The way your back hits the trunk causes pain to strike your spine; but then you also realise how confined you were to it, with Yunho's hands holding you down by your shoulders.
"Don't piss me off, Liyah." He states, leaning in close to let his breath tickle your face. "That'd be very detrimental of you to do so."
"Am I pissing you off now, oh." you deadpan, placing your hands on his chest to shove him away. That seemed like the only viable option for you. "I'm so sorry."
"Keep your sarcasm to yourself, Liyah," he mutters, inching closer to let his lips brush against yours, "you want to know why I let Alexis play me like a violin?"
He takes your silence for a yes and continues, "because I wanted to know what your heart truly desires. Did it even want me, or was I just fantasizing a future between us which doesn't really exist?"
"You could've asked me," you mumble, your lips quivering as your stomach twists inside, "you could've asked me, and I would've been upfront with you, Yunho."
Tears spill out of your eyes, streaming down your cheeks. He couldn't watch you cry. Looking away for a second, he trains his now teary eyes on you.
"Asked?" he repeats, "Liyah, we've both been lying to each other since our senior year in high school." His hands slide down to your waist, wrapping around to maintain some distance between you and the tree trunk. "We would've never been real with each other. Let alone, even confessing to each other felt like such a task for us."
"Then what were you trying to do, Yunho?" you mumble, keeping your hands on his chest, "you kissed Alexis. And before that, you gave me hope that we could be together. Now, you're saying we should've been more straightforward with each other. You're not making sense."
"I know I'm not," he grumbles, "because nothing makes sense to me now. I thought you'd confess to me on the rooftop, I had prepared a long ass speech for you, confessing my feelings too. But then, you brought up Mingi—"
"—nothing ever happened between me and Mingi," you intervene, letting your lips form a frown, "the night of our graduation party, he did ask me out. But I turned him down. You know why? Because I liked you." Suffocating under his gaze, you take a deep breath and continue, "I didn't want to start something with him if it meant I had to break him soon. Because I was too hopeful for either of us to make a sound. I was eager to be in a relationship with you. I was impatient to tell you how badly I had fallen for you. But then, we never said anything. We only ruined it for us. How long were we going to yearn in silence?"
Yunho takes a moment to process your words, your phrases of sheer truth before he instigates, "so, you and Mingi...?"
"No, we're not together," you shake your head, groaning softly as you push your body into his; your hands slip from his chest to the either side of his waist.
"Ah really?" he rasps, resting his forehead on yours, "then I wouldn't mind making a sound. I like you too, Liyah. Oh, to hell with it, I think I love you."
You bite back on chuckle, rubbing the sides of his waist as you lean into his touch. "I think I'm falling in love with you too."
"Hmm," he hums before grunting in pure impatience, "ah, fuck it."
In a fraction of a second, his lips meet yours, capturing a daze of lust and hunger before melting into utter passion. He delicately cups your face, the palms of his hands ever so softly caressing your keeps; he tilts your head slightly, giving him the chance to deepen the kiss. You're drowning in the way his lips lay so gentle against yours. Basking his lips into yours, you whimper as frailly as you could, bringing your hands up to his shoulders for support.
The kiss only grows deeper than before, with him pushing his body into yours and keeping your chest flushed against his. Desperation is evident in the sound of his grunt, and in the way his chest rumbles; his teeth sink in your lower lip, thumbs pressing your cheekbones before pulling himself back and letting go of your lower lip. He watches your lip wobble with amusement, smirking to himself as you whine almost inaudibly.
"You know, we were chasing stars in the dark, blindfolded," he murmurs, nudging the tip of his nose with yours, not moving quite back yet. The warmth of his breath sends shivers down your spine, causing tremors to creep on your skin. "We couldn't see our feelings for each other, but at least we knew they were there."
"Yeah yeah, I get it," you huff out, pulling him by the collar of his jacket, "I've waited too long for you, now, why don't you shut up and kiss me?"
"Yes, ma'a—" you tug him down, putting your lips on his to shut him up.
Grasping onto the collar of his jacket, you push yourself into him; your toes curl in your boots upon feeling the lushness of his lips. You're far too gone to resist your desires. All the years of curbing your carnality for him had led up to this moment, where you're kissing him back as ravenously as you could. The hunger is evident in the way his lips move against yours; he bites down on your lower lip, eliciting a murmured gasp from you. The dainty vibration of your noise gets absorbed in the kiss, breaking out into a small and heated make out sesh under the starlight.
Yunho's hands slip away from your face, grazing past your collarbones and then down to your waist. He brings your hips into his, heedlessly grinding his crotch on yours. The feelings make you an airhead, too dazed to realise when his tongue had slithered past your swollen lips and into your mouth. His sloppy, wet and warm tongue plays with yours; its roughness melts when you tackle his tongue with your own, moaning. This was too much, too much all at once; his hips rolling into yours, showing you how eager he was to take you right there and then. You couldn't really believe how desperate he was, or how you could sense the hardness of his cock through his trousers.
Your mind goes blank, chest heaving into his as your body goes erratic to him shoving his tongue down your throat. He twists and turns it inside, plunging down further to touch extreme end of your palate. His tongue almost makes you gag, but neither of you pull away. Not even when your lungs were crumpling and urging you to take a breath. His fingers dig into your flesh, leaving marks through your nifty tank top. Heat starts rising up your cheeks, tipping off every inch of your body when you come to your senses; you were kissing Yunho. The Jeong Yunho whom you had been crushing over for years.
The wait was worth it.
Yunho gasps as he pushes back, taking a deep breath in through his mouth and you watch his chest rise invariably.
"I think we should take this inside," he pecks your lips, "I can't bear this any longer. I fucking need you..."
You brush his hair, letting your fingers tangle in his silky strands while you swipe your tongue on his lower lip. "Do you really?"
He grunts, sounding deep and dark; before you could do anything else to him, he grabs both of your hands by their wrists and pins them above your head. Diving back in to resume the covetous kiss, he sucks on your lips, akin to shut you up. You let him devour you, quite literally; his teeth scrape over your lower lip and you bite back a whimper. His other hand teasingly drags to the hem of your tank top; wasting a second, tracing light circles on your skin, he lets his fingers divulge under first. The cold tips of his fingers delineate strokes until his whole hand is under your top. His fingertips graze the lower part of your tit, teasing you.
He breaks the kiss through halfway again, pushing your body down from the way he held your hands.
"Are you fucking talking back to me?" he leans in to kiss you again, but doesn't really; his lips hover onto yours, so painfully close yet so far away. "Yeah, I fucking need you. I've been craving all of you for the past six years. Your lips, your heart, your soul, I want to touch it all."
"I'm not stopping you, am I?" you whisper, lurching forward to kiss him but he's quick, and tilts his head away. You pout, "you're a—"
He doesn't let you finish and kisses you, stealing your breath away. "Baby, I'm incharge. You better not open your mouth for anything other than moaning and whimpering like the sweet little girl you are."
You nod, humming.
"That's my good girl, now..." he drags his voice to a grumble; he lets go of your hands and instead, hooks his around your knees and picks you up.
"Yunho!" you gasp as you're lifted and slung on his shoulder. His other hand comes to cup your ass, while the one supporting you stays around your waist.
He doesn't respond to you and carries you away from the dark; the upside down view of yours tells you exactly where he was taking you. Catching the glimpse of your cabin, and the bright light on porch of the cabin, you anticipate what's to come. The cabin door is shoved open inside, too harshly to keep it from making any sound. As the vibrations of the thud drown out, you're thrown on the twin sized bed of your cabin.
It's dark, not pitch black, but dimly lit because of the moonlight flooding through the sole window situated above the bed. You huff in stifling annoyance, laying on the bed and supporting yourself by your elbows. Hearing bellicose shuffles from Yunho, you peek up to find him taking his jacket off. It is then thrown on the floor, leaving him in only his black trousers and a pale blue button-down shirt. Amidst the darkness, he meets your eyes, and they don't waver one bit; he crawls onto the bed, and you saunter back till you hit the wooden wall behind you.
"What, are you scared?" he prances close to you, like a predator approaching its prey. You shake your head, and he chuckles, "you can use your words, sometimes."
You purse your lips together, not wanting to utter a sound because you were sure it'd have its own consequences. Squeezing your thighs together, to try not to make it seem obvious that you were beyond aroused, feeling your slick drench your panties and your shorts. Yunho's body shudders visibly as he lets out a harmless laugh, bringing his hands to roam your body before they end up around your waist. He's trapped you against the wooden panelling behind, with his body pressed up against you instead. Moonlight hits his eyes, illuminating the sheer lust in them; pools of melted honey had suddenly succumbed to their darkness. He's perfectly slotted in between your legs, and you take merest of efforts to wrap them around his waist. With an arch of your back, your hips buck into his and your cunt is in direct contact with his raging erection.
"Okay, don't want to speak?" he whispers, tracing the tip of his nose along your cheek and gliding it further down, "fine. Don't. I'll be getting some sounds out of you, anyway."
Yunho likes how you were so desperate for him, how you were rolling your hips to get more friction; practically grinding on his cock, you tried to gauge how big he was. You always knew from the rumours that he was huge, but this was the moment where you'd be witnessing it for yourself. He bites down your lips, before pulling back and sticking his tongue out. You do the same and bring him closer to you by wrapping your hands around his neck. Expecting him to kiss you, you're left stunned when he sucks on your tongue instead. He sucks on it as if it was a piece of candy.
The sloppy sucking turns into sloppy kissing, and you groan into the kiss, intertwining your fingers in few strands of his hair falling over his neck. Yunho chortles, grinding his hips on your cunt to show how hard he was now. You can't think straight; first of all, it's starting to get dark in the cabin, second of all, Yunho's lips had been driving your insane, and third of all, his cock was rigid and feeling it through your clothes was starting to turn you off. Yunho breaks the kiss, pulling back just a little; translucent strings of spit cover both of your lips, keeping them in an illusion of being attached.
A mischievous smirk curls on his Yunho's lips, and he buries his head in the crook of your neck; leaving back bruises, he bites and sucks on your flesh. He knew your weak spot, you had shared it to him the day you had lost your virginity; it was a mistake telling him, because he was figuratively, abusing it for you. The spot lied three fingers below your earlobe, and he was nibbling on the exact spot to bring out the worst in you. It's gonna be bruised purple and blue, and Yunho's going to take the pride in it.
"Yunho!" you gasp and moan, tilting your head to a side to let him have better angle to abuse your neck. Lost in the wind of pleasure, you let your hands slide down his back, resting delicately on his shoulder blades.
"I know," his smirk widens, "did you think I wouldn't remember it?"
The clutter of his whisper melts to silence. His hands which had been on your waist for all this time, were starting to creep up. Except, he had the hem of your tank top in his hold. Pulling it up to your collarbone, he mumbles incoherent words against your neck as your tits spill out. You did not find it practical to wear a bra after your evening shower, and now that you think about it, you made a good decision not to. Yunho's cheeks turn an alluring shade of red upon catching a glimpse of your perky tits.
There had been accidental glances before, whenever you'd wear low cut tops or dresses, even your strapless tops exposed much more of your cleavage than you would intend on. Yunho respected your body, and the boundaries which were conspicuous in a friendly way; he might not be so blatant about it, but on a night or two, you were the starlight of his fantasies while he jerked off. In fact, he would've sworn off on his own words, if it weren't for your thoughts helping him 'get it on' with his ex-girlfriends. He would never disclose that to you, would he? During those moments however, whenever he'd be struck by post-nut clarity, he'd feel ashamed and guilty.
Well, not anymore.
Your body is bewitching, making him lose his senses; the movement of his hips ceases in a sudden state, wrenching out more desperation from you as you heedlessly keep bucking yourself into him. You wonder what made him stop, and your curiosity is sated almost immediately when he pushes himself back and supports himself on his knees. His sleek fingers work on the buttons of his shirt, coming undone one by one. He doesn't take off his shirt just yet only unbuttons the top half of it while leaning over to capture your lips in a head spinning kiss.
His lap on yours, devouring the sweet essence; you press on a moan, rolling yourself into him and pushing your bare chest against his. The soft material of shirt rests over your tits, tickling the pit of your stomach as you continue to push your chest into his. Yunho's chest collapses with a guttural moan, pulling himself away from the kiss. He offers you a smirk, before using his hands to pull the tank top over your head. It's off and thrown on the floor, keeping you bare on your top half for him.
"Are you sure about this?" he asks you, cheeks still red and alluring. Leaning over, he rests his forehead on yours, and lets his lips brush against yours.
You let your hands hover on his back, dipping your fingers only for their tips to lightly ghost along till you wrap them around the nape of his neck and pull him in. "Yeah, as sure as I've been about my feelings for you."
"There's no going back after this," he cups a side of your face and pecks your lips, "so, if you're having second thoughts, just tell me."
"I'm not," you mumble, breathlessly pressing your lips with his, "I want this. I know you want it too."
"Well, I've been wanting this since the day I got myself to fall for you." He smiles, bringing one of his hands to grab yours on the back of his neck. "A lot of things have happened in my mind since then, a lot of fantasies, a lot of desires..."
Before you could ask him about them, he quickly grabs your hand and pins it over your head; he does the same for your other hand, and ignoring your whines, he constraints both of your hands with his one. He's back to rolling his crotch onto yours, giving you the sensory stimulation of his erection through your clothes. The urge to rid yourself from the confines of your shorts was beyond anything, wanting to be naked for him to grind himself on you. As if that thought wasn't enough to make you wet, you were actually clenching at the friction of his cock against your cunt.
The shorts had to go. And his clothes too. You were mewling despair, having never considered yourself desperate for someone's cock as much as you're right now. His knees sunk into the mattress underneath, while your legs remain wrapped around his waist; he slides his free hand down to the waistband of your shorts, fingers fumbling to unbutton and pull them off.
"I just need to know you're okay with everything I have to do."
"Do you need a written consent now?" you groan, annoyed and irritated. "You can do whatever you want, I have no complaints."
"Be careful with what you say," he warns you, forcing his hips into yours to give you more of him. "I don't want you crying later on."
"What do you take me for?" you stick your tongue out, "I have been with many guys before you."
"Did you really have to mention that?" he grunts, pushing his hand past the waistband of your shorts; while his other hand kept yours bound above your head, he was making the best with his one free hand. "I'll teach you a lesson, make you forget about everyone in your past."
"I'll like to see you try—ah fuck, Yunho!" you gasp, fisting your hands tighter when his fingers press on your clit.
"That's right, scream my name," he growls, burying his head in the crook of neck and biting your flesh harshly.
You were going to have red and blue splotches littered all over your skin tomorrow; and that would make it everyone obvious of yours and his nightly venture. Yunho's teeth sink further while his fingers slither along your slit, rubbing you up and down through your panties, making you moan out loud.
"Yunho..."
"Huh, what is it?" he mumbles against your skin, licking the spots he had marked and bitten.
"Please..."
"I don't understand one-word answers, doll," he chuckles, the vibrations preening your skin. "Be clear and say what you want. I'll give it to you."
"Fuck—fuck you," you say out of spite, grumbling as your eyes shut close and darkness takes over. You couldn't stare at the ceiling while he abused your neck, and his fingers worked you up.
"Uh-huh," he tuts, ceasing the movements of his fingers, "what a foul mouth. Be nice or else I won't touch you at all." He brings his hands out and your eyes flutter open at the emptiness; you whine, "please, Yunho. I won't—I won't say that again."
"And I'm supposed to trust you?"
"Please..." you whine again, bucking your hips up. "I'll do whatever you want next time."
"I'm more of a provider than a receiver." His hand dives back in your shorts, his fingers rubbing you through your panties. "And I think we're wasting too much time already."
The moonlight shines through the window again, illuminating half of his face for your eyes; it hits his chin and his nose, keeping his own eyes shrouded in dark. You roll your hips into his fingers as they continue their motion, going up and down along your slit and pressing against your clit whenever they could. Squinting your eyes shut tight, you let the pleasure build and your slick grows denser in your panties; it soaks through, coating bits of his skin as he keeps rubbing you down.
"Getting wetter by the second, I see. Really fucking desperate, aren't you doll?"
He pulls himself back altogether, "keep your hands up, or else I might have to punish you."
You nod, pursing your lips together and then crossing your wrists over another to fix them above your head. In the darkness, as the moon crosses your window, you catch a glimpse of Yunho shrug out of his shirt and hold it in his hand. He keeps it to a side before grabbing your waist and pulling you down on the bed, with such ease that you felt weightless. You plop against the mattress, yelping softly as you let him do as he pleases with you.
"You know, I don't really trust you with your hands," he muses, leaning over as he brings his hand back on yours. "So, let's keep them away for the night."
Taking the sleeves of his shirt, he crosses and loops them around your wrists and then hooks them up with the short and narrow rail of the bed. The sleeves come out in front of the rail, right where the headboard and he ties a tight knot. Your hands are stretched above your head, while you're lying restrained on the bed.
"Perfect." He clicks his tongue and moves back.
Bending his knees and sinking into the mattress, he is right in between with your legs on either side of him. He supports the underside of your thighs, arching your lower back up as it gives him better control over you. Without wasting any time, he effortlessly tugs your shorts down and rids you of them. Light crumpling follows and you know your shorts are lying on the ground along with your top and his jacket. You're squirming under him, too exposed to his eyes, even though you were in your panties; tilting your head up, you peek at him and watch him wet his middle and ring finger with his spit. The sheer coat of them shines under the moonlight and you groan, already anticipating what's to come.
He smirks lightly, as he lets the pads of his fingers rub on your mound through the panties at first and then drags them painstakingly down along your slit, pressing gently against your clit along the way. With a few more strokes, your mouth falls open, moans whispering past it as he picks up his face. His spit covers your soaked panties, wetting them further and they act as your second skin; he purposely presses hard along your slit, eliciting a throaty moan before it subsides to a whine.
His fingers were off of you, leaving you with a feeling of emptiness and confusion. "Let's get you out of these, shall we?"
With one swift breath, he hook his fingers under the waistband one tour panties and tugs them all the way down; you're completely exposed to him, shuddering in your skin as his hungry eyes drink every detail of your cunt. Your panties loosely hang by his pinky finger, while an ordained smirk teases his lips and keeps them parted. He starts palming his crotch, closing his eyes and throwing his head back for the mere minute as his cock begins to harden in his briefs.
"Look at the sheen on those lips," he coos, amused and eyes now fixed on your cunt. And you knew he definitely wasn't talking about the lips on your face. "Fuck, doll. Were you that eager to be fucked by me? So wet and eager for me."
He's teasing you and it's turning too embarrassing for you; closing your eyes you turn your head and whine, "fuck you."
At the realisation, your eyes shot open and stare at him in pure fright, but also a little bit of anticipation. He did warn you before, to keep your mouth clean and shut; now that you had openly cursed at him, all left to do was to wait for the consequences be bestowed on you. Yunho's eyes turn dark, lost in the carnal desire and prolonging the silence before he sighs, a sigh which translates to nothing but terror for you.
"What did I tell you?" he grunts, asking you a question in his commanding tone. "I asked you to keep your mouth shut. If you got nothing better to say, then don't say anything at all...right?"
As your chest rises and falls, convulsing to his utter lust and hunger, you press your lips together and prevent from squeaking any sounds; but to your unbridled surprise, his other hand comes flying to grab your jaw and fingers poke into your cheeks. He's too rough and savage as he forces your mouth open and stuffs your panties in your mouth.
"Much better." He remarks, sinking back on his knees and in between your legs; he fixes his gaze on you, and nudges his head. "If you let that fall from your mouth, oh baby, I don't know what might happen to you."
"Nghhhh..." even your groan gets muffled, and your tongue stays flat against the floor of your mouth; the smooth material of panties does chafe your tongue, but it's only in the slightest.
"Good girl," he praises, delighting himself with a smile before placing his hands back under your thighs. "Now, I have a treat for myself."
Licking his lips, he slouches himself in a way to have his face lowered in between your legs; his warm breath ghosts over your mound, then slowly tickles your skin as it drifts to your slit and folds. He grips your thighs tightly, dentures forming in your flesh as he does. Spreading your legs apart and keeping them propped on his tight, he drools at the sight of your cunt stretching out itself. It wasn't much, but it was enough for his cock to strain painfully in his pants.
"You're so beautiful, Liyah." He mumbles, fluttering a soft kiss over your mound before going further down, "I'm jealous of all the men who got to see this beauty before me. Holy fuck—just the thought itself makes me want to ruin this tight little thing."
His words vibrate against your skin, making you moan and urging you to scream. Alas, you can't really voice your pleasure or your desires. The wispy sensation of his breath tells you how close he was to your cunt, lips hovering over and with only a slight tilt of his head, he'd be all buried in you. The warmth of his hands slowly starts creeping up your thighs, fingers splayed and pressing to create bruises on your skin.
"I have your consent to do what I want, right, Liyah?" he mumbles, cupping the lower part of your ass.
You groan out loud to answer him, finding it extremely torturous to have your hands tied and mouth gagged. Unspoken tremors spread under your skin when his thumbs press against your folds, pulling them apart to reveal the hidden details behind them. He hums in satisfaction at the sight of your pink flesh blooming into delicate petals. You feel the mellow stretch burning your heart, combusting you whole as your patience run low. If your hands were free, you'd be pushing his head in between your legs, wrap your thighs around his face and suffocate on your juices.
Sadly, it was only confined to your mind as Yunho was pacing his actions slowly and steadily. His thumbs press on your fleshy folds furthermore, putting you entirely on a display for him; you swollen nub tautens, needing attention, your arousal just keeps flowing out. You throw your head back into the mattress, arching your neck and holding your tears in; this was embarrassing, but in a good way. You were utterly humiliated to have your best friend slotted in between your legs, learning and identifying every detail of your cunt.
You grumble in frustration and chagrin; all your desires and fantasies erupting a sense of pleasure and wonder in your heart.
"Fucking hell, you sound so heavenly right now." He comments, smiling.
As your stretched cunt glints with an appealing shine (from your arousal), it becomes quite difficult for Yunho to control his inner animal. He dips his head in, tongue sticking out and flat to lick up your slit first. Puckering his lips, he presses a few kisses on your mound before gurgling out a good amount of spit; the coldness of his spit trickles down, perfectly along your slit. You close your eyes even tighter than before, letting a few tears escape.
"Ynnmunnho...!" you try to spell out his name with the scream but fail miserably because of the panties bunched up in your mouth.
"I know, I fucking know, doll..." he whispers, licking and lapping up your juices mixed with his spit. "I'm going to take my time devouring you."
Soon, he's going all in. Pressing the tip of his tongue in your slit, sucking on your clit and tensing all the nerves, he's partially fucking you with his tongue. If only you were able to touch him and scream his name out, it'd be perfect. One of his hands disappears from holding you apart and reappears with its warmth on your folds. His mouth is sucking and licking your cunt, while his finger protrudes at your hole. Letting another wad of spit roll down your slit, his fingers collect it by the tips before pushing inside; his fingers had always been sleek and long, quite girthy too. At first, the stretch from his fingers stings a bit but then it subsides to sheer pleasure. It bubbles in your stomach, forcing you to arch your back and fist your hands tight enough for your knuckles to go white.
"Fuck, you're tight, doll." He remarks, chuckling to himself, "bet none of your exes did a better job at fucking you loose."
His fingers plunge further inside, while his mouth is back on your clit, suckling and slurping up the spit and your arousal. Pulling back only a centimetre, he mumbles against your skin, "such a sweet thing—tastes so sweet and perfect."
You whimper at his words, giving you sensory whiplash before you breathe in hard through your nose. There was no way you could control yourself now, you couldn't even resist your gut burning with a familiar knot tying itself in your stomach. His fingers kept a steady a pace inside, only to switch it up next second; they're thrusting in deep, squealing your walls and curling inside to brush against your g-spot. The sudden caress of his fingers against your sensitive spot, makes you moan and see stars behind your closed eyes.
Grumbling incoherently, you buck your hips into his face and his fingers slip deeper, while his tongue presses further into your clit. The wetness, the roughness and warmth of his tongue were driving you crazy to begin with, and then his fingers start moving in a scissoring manner to stretch you out. This was unbearable, agonising every muscle in your body and more importantly, it was torturing your every being to not scream his name out till you're practically unconscious with a sore throat.
You did not know Yunho was this freaky in the sheets; never once did it cross your mind in the years of your friendship, that he'd be assertive and rough, delighting himself in manhandling. The thoughts in your head are cut short when he lets another clump of his spit roll down your slit, his tongue rubbing in circles and sideways to ruin you completely. It was working. His ways were working. The only downside to this, was your inability to touch him. You would've loved to scratch your nails on his back, create those red marks all over; you would've stroked his ego by chanting his name in your daze.
With that, a very dire notion pops in your mind and your eyes light up before fluttering open; you prod the gag of your panties out of your mouth with your tongue, and let it fall off onto the mattress besides you. Taking a deep breath in to sate your lungs from suffocation, you whimper ever so lightly, not loud enough to catch his attention.
Yunho is engrossed in sucking at your clit, but he's not a fool to not know what was happening above him. He smirks softly, pulling himself back, while managing the rhythm of his fingers sawing through you. Having your head thrown back, and your eyes closed, you don't notice him straightening up only a bit to watch you with amusement.
"You're such a brat, Liyah," he mutters under his breath, "guess I'll save your punishment for the next time. Now, let's get over this."
He brings his fingers out, letting you cherish the emptiness before straightening his posture completely and questions you, "Do you have a safe word?"
You shake your head, heart warming up to the concern in his voice and spell out, "ugh, no...I don't."
Yunho heaves out a sigh before legging his lips fleet with a smile, "I work on the colour system, much like traffic signals; so, red is stop, green is okay, and yellow is pause. Understood?"
You nod your head and then pout, struggling in the restraints; yeah, your hands are numb and on the verge of going limp. "Can you take this off?"
"Not a chance, doll." He smirks, "you can handle it."
Subtly glancing at his pants, he's quick in unbuttoning, unzipping and tugging them off of his legs. All your clothes were either piled or strewn on the floor, and his pants were a new addition. Yunho shifts on his knees to find a comfortable spot, while you salivate over the outline of his cock being so prominent through his abstract painted briefs. They're a mix of red, blue and black and you really didn't think you'd fixate yourself on the pattern of his briefs, but it seemed like they had some minute detail printed on it.
"Stop staring," he leans over and flicks your forehead, his own cheeks turning red along yours.
You whine, as the skin of your forehead starts stinging a bit. "You're just...really hot. It's not my fault—it's not my fault you grew up to be so hot."
"Flattery is devil's work." He rolls his eyes, but still manages to capture your lips in a short lived yet wild kiss. "Hmm, seriously, if you feel uncomfortable at any moment of this, please tell me."
Composing himself, he straightens up and hooks his fingers under the elastic band of his briefs; he snaps it first, and then hauls them off of his legs. Again, they're thrown somewhere on the floor. He's bare in front of you, his cock springing up and touching his lower belly. You were right, the rumours you thought were made up in school, are true. He was huge and thick; the veins on his shaft were bulging out, the tip was red and a little bit of precum had coated the slit.
"I told you to stop staring."
He grunts and that's all you know before being flipped over on your stomach by his arms around your waist. You're pressed up against the mattress, your face buried in the sheets, while one of his hands slithers up your back to wrap itself around your neck. Applying little to no pressure, he pushes your head further into the mattress and groans out softly.
"Fuck," your words are muffled by the mattress.
He doesn't waste any time in propping you up on your knees, letting your lower half raise in the air; your ass was juttinout, while your back arched perfectly on the mattress. Keeping his hand on your neck, he uses his other to slap your ass. It was done with a playful intention, but it was enough to leave a faint impression of his hand on your skin. He repeats for two more times before admiring the red streaks of his hand on your skin, he takes his pride in it before flushing his hips against the back of your thighs and aligning his cock with your hole.
You could hear the shuffling, you could sense his movements regardless of your vision being limited to the white of the sheets; you wanted to turn your head and glance back at him, but his grasp on your neck was making it hard to move. And it seemed like he wasn't going to let you any sooner either.
"Fuck fuck fuck fuck," he chants breathlessly, closing his eyes shut and throwing his head back as he enters you; only his tip is prodding into your hole. "Liyah, please relax for me. You're too fucking—you're too fucking tight."
"Nghhhhh...!" you whimper, your spine shuddering when he tries to push himself in you from the back.
This position was your favourite, to say the least you liked the way it allowed one to hit every right spot in you. Yunho may have only gotten his tip inside, but you know the stretch from it was still ugly and unbearing. Only for the time being, however. Once you take a deep breath in and relax your muscles, it eases out your nerves and allows him to slip further in. Not long after, he's bottomed out; his thighs flush against yours, and his cock completely buried in you. He waits a beat for you to adjust to his size. Yunho is self aware, he knows how excruciating it'd be for a woman to take in his cock without any prep or care.
"Yeah, that's my good girl—just breathe—let me know when I can—when I can move," he stutters in his daze, his eyes opening to the heavenly feeling of your walls around his cock. He indulges himself in it, liking the warmth of your cunt and how tight you were.
You press your hips back into his, signalling him the known and he takes the hint before pulling him out; he doesn't pull out all the way, instead he lets the tip of his cock stay in you, promoting at your cervix before he gradually pushes himself in. His concise and slow thrusts give you the ability to adjust around him, getting used to his size in a minute or two.
"Don't forget to use the safe words, okay..." he mumbles under his breath.
As his words reverberate, he picks up his pace and thrusts faster into you; he pulls back and pushes in, lowering his thighs into yours and sticking to a healthy rhythm. His hand comes to support you by resting on your thigh from your lower back, while his other is already pressing your head into the mattress. You were drawling on your breath, suffocating and gasping for air; regardless, you weren't bothered by it, you were too immersed in the sting of your walls stretching around his cock and then relaxing every time he pulled out a little. It was driving you insane.
"Yunho, fuck...faster," you try to voice out, but the words are absorbed into the mattress.
Even if your words were inaudible to him, Yunho picks up the tempo of his hips, his fingers digging in your thigh as he holds onto it for leverage. This makes him go feral, having an untamed desire to ruin and fuck you raw. He brings his hand to the small of your back and lets it rest there, while his thrusts falter but show no signs of stopping.
"You're really—fuck—you're really fucking tight, doll." He breathes out, loosening his grip on your neck before sliding his hand up front.
Grabbing your throat now, he pulls up; your restrained hands limit your movement, and he makes the up the remaining distance by leaning his chest against your chest. Skipping a beat, he increases the speed of his thrusts, plunging his cock deep in you every time he drew out and rammed in hard. A voiceless chuckle sounds from beside you, right near your ear; his head rested delicately on the back of your shoulder, just above your shoulder blade.
Sweat beads trickle on your skin, followed by his whispery chants of your name. You're too turned on by his grunts and moans being close to your ears, salvaging the heated knot in your stomach again.
"Yunho, I'm close..." you mumble, closing your eyes and taking a deep breath.
"Just a little bit, hold it out..." he grumbles, delaying his thrusts to drag out your orgasm.
You groan at the sluggish pace, instinctively pushing yourself back into his cock. Though, when he gently yet threateningly, slaps the curve of your back, you yelp and steady yourself.
"Don't even think about it," he warns, rolling his hips into yours and picking up the pace.
"But Yunho—fuck," your whine is cut short to a moan; bringing his hand to the front, from your back, he offers your filled pussy a light slap.
His hand drops from your throat too and instead slides down to tug on your nipples and grope your tits; his fingers scuttle in your flesh, nails leaving little crescent marks behind and his lips tracing kisses along your neck. He straighten his back and wraps both of his hand around your waist, giving him the better weight to sink his cock into you. And he was delivering really harsh thrusts to your back.
"Hmm, Yunho— I can't—I can't hold it in much—much longer." you say in between your moans, and whimpers, knowing how intense the knot in your stomach had tied itself into.
Yunho hums along, "fuck it."
He flips you on your back, with much ease than before and he slows himself down to short and concise thrusts. You're laying on your back, the shackled shirt of his twisting in the process which did not bring any strain to your arms; though you could say that your arms were tired and numb from staying in one position for so long. Yunho likes the sight of you sprawled under him, helpless and desperate; he wraps your legs around his waist and continues to ram into you.
"You're so pretty—so fucking pretty squirming under me," he growls, leaning over you.
He supports his body weight by plopping his hands on either side of your face and diminishes the distance between your faces to kiss you. His lips bring the much-needed placidity to your heart while his cock is stretching you raw, thrusting into your cunt at an animalistic pace and fluttering your walls. The kiss turns hungry and he's soon devouring your face; you arch your back and let your hips roll into his.
This current position causes you to clench around him; while your own orgasm was a few thrusts away, you were also trying to milk his out. Yunho's lips trail down your jaw and then your neck, tongue going over the hickeys he had left before. The knot which had gone limp a few moments ago, comes back with much more force and intense churning of your gut. You push your chest into his, and he starts to increase his pace furthermore. He had gone feral at this point, bucking his hips into with no care whatsoever.
You're both chasing each other's highs. It takes one longing thrust from him, and you're coming undone, releasing your juices all over his cock as he keeps going at it. Yunho pulls himself back, supporting himself on his arms and offers you smug smile.
"Making a mess on my cock, huh?" he groans, your tense walls pushing him to his edge. "Fuck, I'm close too—gonna fill you up..."
It doesn't take long for him to cum either; right after you, after a few more whiling minutes of thrusting and ramming his cock into you, he too comes undone. The warmth of his cum fills you up, and it keeps trickling down your cunt as he slowly pulls out. A few drops fall on your folds and few dribble down on the mattress underneath you. You're breathless, and voiceless, your chest heaving in the air and dropping erratically to compose yourself.
Yunho falls next to you on the twin sized bed, somehow managing to fit himself in the very little space. He turns to face you, wrapping an arm around you and pulling both of your bodies closer. Now, the two of you actually fit on the bed, snuggling close to each other, reeking of sex and sweat. Your hair stuck to your forehead from the sweat, and Yunho strokes a few strands away.
"I'm...I don't know what to say." he begins, hopefully looking into your eyes.
You rest your head on his chest and wrap your arms around his torso; both are sweaty and sticky, but it's the least of your concerns now.
"Can we talk about it tomorrow?"
"Well, we really need to address this."
Yunho rubs your back up and down, letting his fingertips caress your skin gently and relax you.
"There's nothing to address, Yunho," you bite back on your tone and use a more subtle one, "this isn't a mistake. Obviously. I like you, a lot. And I'm looking for a prospect relationship here."
"I'm alright with that, but..." he trails off, sighing softly and you prop yourself on your elbows to stare at him, finding his lips trembling, "we're both pursuing our degrees in different cities. So, till we graduate we'll be in a long-distance relationship."
"And what do you think that long distance relationships don't work?" you retort, and eventually, slump yourself back on his chest. While your hands rest on his chest, your fingers draw circles and certain patterns; your sentiments become clearer and you mumble, "I was thinking of moving cities, you know."
"Liyah," he whispers, "you don't have to."
His gradual touches on your arm as you lay on his chest, are soft and warm and so his tone as he speaks up.
"We should move in together after graduation. Let's make this long-distance work; and besides..." he drags his words to a mumble again, only to lean down and kiss your forehead.
"We've been chasing stars for long; may they be in dark or the light. They made me realise I need you in my life."
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daisyvisions · 1 month
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Goldfinger - (k.yh)
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➺ Pairing: Agent 007! reader x Younghoon
➺ Summary: You left the force years ago for a good reason. But it’s that same reason why you’re back on the mission, trying to catch him once and for all… Goldfinger.
➺ Word Count: 3.6k
➺ Warnings: Smut (18+, minors DNI), fem!reader, unprotected sex, choking, hate sex (if you squint), cowgirl, missionary, overstimulation, handjob, oral (m! receiving), creampies, face slapping, guns, drugs, and alcohol are mentioned, being tied up, dry humping, teasing, pet names used (baby and sweetheart), let me know if I missed anything!
➺ A/N: Very loosely based on the movie. This spy fic is not related to the other Younghoon spy fic I did! This is my entry for The 007 files by the lovely @winterchimez. Proofread once, hope you enjoy! Side note: the song from this movie is my fave so it’s linked up at the end of the fic if you wanna listen!
➺ Network & Tag: @deoboyznet @aimeecarreros @snowflakewhispers
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You stare at the vesper martini in your hand as you slowly swirl it around, watching the liquid move inside the glass. You were sitting by the bar of this incredible mansion. You have never been to a party like this before.
Everyone was dressed to the nines in this lavish event. Everything from the Hors D'oeuvres to the entertainment screamed luxury, it was like you were invited to a party from The Great Gatsby. As you sip from your glass, you reflect back to why you’re even here to begin with…
Goldfinger.
He was your toughest case that suddenly went cold a couple of years back. To be honest, you were incredibly reluctant to take on this case again, having quit the force around the same time the case went dry and after that incident in Monaco when you nearly died because of trying to catch Goldfinger.
You almost had him that time, almost finally being able to place a face to the name since no one knew what Goldfinger looked like (and he planned on keeping it that way). Out of all the cases you’ve done, he was the one that kept you on your feet, kept your heart running a mile a minute, he somewhat made you feel alive again every time you were close to catching him.
But after the incident you vowed to never go back on the force and start a new life. And that’s what you did. Changed your name, moved to a new location, left everyone you knew in order to truly wipe out that chapter in your life. But sometimes you would catch yourself reminiscing those times, especially the Goldfinger case.
He was different from the other villains, that’s what made him interesting. You knew in your heart Goldfinger was more than just a man loaded with money. He was smart, cunning, and very strategic. In some weird and funny way when you think about it, he kind of reminds you of your own boyfriend Younghoon.
How he always kept the excitement in your relationship since the day you met, how he was the first man in your life that matched your intellect like no one had ever done before, and not to mention how much he would spoil you in many ways that he could.
He was truly one of the greatest things to happen in your life ever since you quit the force. You saw a future with him, a quiet and peaceful life, raising your own and spending your days with each other forever. It was like you were made for each other.
But there was one problem… You never revealed to him that you were once an agent.
So when your boss suddenly called you up while you were watching a movie with Younghoon, you panicked.
“Who’s that baby?” He looks over at your phone, a name he did not recognize.
“Oh! That’s Jacob, old friend of mine from when I took my masters.” You quickly respond. “Let me just take this call real quick okay?” You kiss his cheek before getting up.
“Okay, but make it quick. I miss you already.” Younghoon pouts before turning his attention back to the tv.
You slowly close the door of your shared bedroom and instantly swipe open your phone. At first, you were mad at Jacob for calling you after specifically telling him to leave you alone for good. But when he started telling you why he called and mentioned the name Goldfinger, you felt a sudden surge of adrenaline pumping within your veins.
“We have a really good lead and we’re sure to catch him this time around. It’s not like what happened in Monaco I can assure you.” Jacob says.
“It sounds really tempting…” You answer, trying to keep a hush tone so your boyfriend doesn’t hear you. “But I don’t know…”
“Just one last time 007, please? For old time’s sake?” You hear the slight desperation in Jacob’s tone.
You pause for a moment, suddenly remembering all the bad memories attached to Goldfinger. But there was little voice within you was screaming to take on the job. Not only that, but you had a sudden vision of meeting Goldfinger face to face and finally ending his mischief once and for all.
“Okay, I’ll do it.” You sigh heavily.
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As you reviewed the case file in your study, you couldn't help but feel off about everything. Was it really a good idea to take this case again? The case that nearly caused your death? Was it to finally close that chapter or was it just for you to relive your glory days as an agent? You shook your head, not wanting to overthink the situation and just jumped right in with what you needed to know and what you were assigned to do.
According to the case file, Goldfinger had been M.I.A the same time you had retired from the force. No one knew where he was or what he was up to until there was sudden activity popping up from the credit card you had tracked years ago.
While the items that were purchased under the credit card weren't out of the ordinary, there was one pattern that stood out to you. The items he had bought seemed to be around the area where you had lived. When you took note of the dates of purchase, you realized they were at a time when you were out with Younghoon too.
Your eyes widened. Had Goldfinger been around you all this time? So close yet so far away? Was he one of the people you sat beside in the train or passed by in your local coffee shop? Whatever it was, it felt like he was mocking you. How he still seems to be right under your nose even after all these years as well as the idea of Younghoon possibly getting into danger bothered you a lot.
It should’ve frightened you, how your past seemed to cling onto you no matter what you did, but instead made you want to catch him even more.
The motivation you once felt being on this case was alive and kicking. As with every case you got into, you knew you would have to face whatever consequences there will be.
Even if it meant leaving the love of your life behind.
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“Do you really have to go?” Younghoon’s raspy voice whispered in your ear as he kissed the spot under your earlobe. His body collapsing on top of you after you two come down from your highs after an intense night of lovemaking.
“It’s a reunion with my friends from master’s school. Can’t pass it up otherwise it will take years for us to see each other again.” You breathe out heavily. Your core throbs slightly as you feel him pull out and his cum slowly spilling out of you.
“Does it really have to be so far away?” He pouts as he helps you get cleaned up with a warm hand towel.
“Paris is not THAT far.” You chuckle, sitting up to grab the water he held in his hand.
“Why don’t you take me with you? Please?” He looks at you with doe eyes. How could say no to a face like that?
“It will be quick, I promise Hoon.” You cup his face and his forehead tenderly.
“Okay.” He smiles, before reaching for your waist and swiftly pulling you on top of him. His mischievous smile already telling you what he wants as you feel his member become hard beneath you again.
“Then let’s make the most of this night baby.”
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“Agent!” You snap back into reality as you hear Jacob shouting in your earpiece.
“Wha-yeah what’s up?” You ask.
“He’s here…” Your heart starts racing at those two words.
Goldfinger, finally in the same vicinity as you are. Just a few feet away from you somewhere in this mansion.
“Which one is he?” You sit up properly and adjust your dress, checking if the gun strapped to your thigh is still in place.
“The tall man by the buffet table, talking to the ambassador of Norway. He’s wearing a gold masquerade mask.”
“On it.”
You down your martini before hopping off the bar stool and placing your own mask back on. You walk around the party while you keep you eye on Goldfinger’s figure, making sure you keep a good distance from him. As soon as he walks up the grand stairs and disappears into one of the rooms in the mansion, you make your way in the crowd and follow him.
As you stealthily walk towards the room he entered, you notice the door was left slightly open, allowing you to peek inside and see what was going on. You could see the back of Goldfinger facing you as he opened and a bottle of whiskey a poured a glass for himself.
There he is, you thought to yourself. You were slightly in awe seeing his figure and surprised to find out that he was not the old fat man you thought he might be. In fact, he appeared to be around your age.
While you were lost in thought, you failed to notice a henchman coming up from behind you and smothers you with a handkerchief, instantly knocking you out with whatever drug was laced on the fabric.
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You slowly wake up to the sound of classical music being played while hearing the muffled sounds of the people outside the room. As you come back to your senses, you realize you were placed lying down on the king sized bed in the suite.
At first you thought it was all a dream, until you feel your hands tied behind your back and your earpiece missing. You suddenly squirm, trying to let yourself free from the restraint until-
“Struggling will only make it worse 007.”
The deep voice making you turn your attention to the living room across. The same figure you had caught a glimpse of, drinking from his whiskey glass before getting up to saunter towards you. The aura around him was so intense you couldn’t help but just freeze and stare at Goldfinger.
As soon as he got to the foot of the bed, he gently pulls your legs towards him, making you sit at the edge while he slowly kneels in front of you.
“I must say, I didn’t expect my 007 to be woman. A pretty one at that.” Goldfinger says with a sultry tone. You know you shouldn’t have reacted that way, but when he said “my” you felt your cheeks become warm. And the way he said you were pretty even if you still had your mask on made you feel butterflies in your stomach.
Keep it together agent!
“At last, we finally meet face to face after all these years.” He caresses your knees as he looks up at you.
Never in your wildest dreams did you think of your first real interaction with Goldfinger would end up like this. And it doesn’t help at the fact the more you try to see his face under the mask, you could tell that he was definitely a handsome man.
But there was definitely something about him that seemed oddly familiar, you just couldn’t name it…
“Bet you missed me too didn’t you?” You tease back. “It’s been a couple of years.”
“Oh yes I have, sweetheart.” He smirks. “Thought about you sometimes while I was on a… break.”
His hands slowly caress your thighs, goosebumps forming on your skin when you feel his hand on the exposed area of your dress. You try to hide the little gasp that comes out of your mouth but fail miserably. His smile grows wider knowing the effect he has on you.
You were so caught up staring into his eyes that you didn't even notice him getting up quick and toppling over you. His body hovers above yours as his hand places your tied wrists above your head.
“Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me Mr. Goldfinger?” You tease him again. He lowers his head and whispers in your ear.
“Why don’t you take a guess?” His hand instantly pulls out his golden pistol and points it under your jaw. You try to free yourself as much as you can but the weight of his body holds you in place, making you suddenly scared for your life once again.
“Let me see your face 007. I want to see the face of my favorite agent before she turns into gold.”
He pulls away from you and removes the mask from your face. Not even a second at looking at your face, Goldfinger suddenly gasps and drops the gun. It looked like he saw a ghost by the way his eyes widened.
“Fuck this can’t be real.” He panics.
“What do you mea-”
Before you could even ask, he removes his own mask, finally revealing to you his own face. You both stare at each other wide eyed, hearts pumping loudly at the shocking revelation happening before you.
“…Y-younghoon?” you stutter. “Is that you?”
“Baby, what the fuck are you doing here?! I thought you were with your friends.”
“And I thought you were back home! Oh my god-” You cover your face with your tied wrists, trying to wipe the tears forming in your eyes.
Suddenly you remember all the little things that made you feel like Younghoon was similar to Goldfinger. It was like it all flashed before you. Here you thought you were the only one keeping secrets, but it looks like your boyfriend was keeping some skeletons in the closet as well.
Younghoon runs his fingers through his hair as he tries to regain his composure, still trying to grasp at the fact the love of his life happens to be the very person out to kill him.
“What are we going to do now?” He looks at you with sadness in his eyes.
Instead of answering him, you sit up and lunge forward, making you both fall off the bed as you topple over his body this time. He struggles to get the gun near his hand, but you’re able to swat it out before he does.
You hold his neck with your hands still tied together, slowly adding pressure to his throat as he tries to pull your arms away. Tears start to fall from your eyes. You would never hurt Younghoon, not in a million years. You never told him about your life in the force to avoid anything bad happening to him. But here you were, trying to kill him.
You felt so confused on what to do. But at the back of your mind, you knew you had to get the job done. To finally put him behind bars once and for all, even if your heart would be broken in the process.
As you attempt to place more pressure on his throat, your eyes grow wide as he suddenly groans out of impulse. His cock slowly becoming erect beneath you in the position you’re both in, his bulge pressing on your panty covered core.
“Don’t do that Hoon…” You whine as you try to take control of the situation.
“I can’t help it! You look absolutely gorgeous in this dress baby.” His eyes look you up and down, making you get a bit shy.
“And the way you want to kill me right now? Holy shit it’s fucking turning me on.” Younghoon groans again, his member throbbing beneath you as he soaks up the sight in front of him.
“Please don’t make this harder than it already is.” You say.
“But don’t you like it hard?” He smirks, but you instantly slap his face with the back of your hand, trying to get him to shut up but you know it’s not working because you feel him throbbing under you again.
“Well, before you take me in agent, can I at least request for one last thing?” He proposes.
“And what would that be Mr. Goldfinger?” You raise one eyebrow.
“Want you to use me-” He said bluntly.
“I’m sorry?” Your eyebrows scrunch together.
“You clearly have a lot of anger you want to let out, why not use it on me instead? One last taste of you before you send me off to the sharks.”
You felt so conflicted. You needed to stop Younghoon right now before he disappears again (or worse, even kill you) but at the same time you are just as turned on as he is….
“Fuck it.” You lunged forward and hungrily kiss him on the lips. He instantly grabs your hips and makes them roll back and forth, moaning at the way he can feel your wet core rubbing against his crotch.
You continue to roll your hips as Younghoon grabs your wrists and unties the rope holding them together. As soon as you’re set free your hands start to slip to his belt, hastily unbuckling them as you slide your hand in his pants, eager to fist his length like you’ve never done before.
Younghoon’s moans grow louder as you pump his cock in your hand, your tongue snaking its way into his mouth. His hands cup your breasts, kneading them as you both touch each other like a pair of twenty-year olds in college. You both help each other up from the floor and onto the bed, removing each other’s clothes as you continue your ministrations.
You waste no time going down on him, leaving a trail of hot kisses from his jaw until his abdomen before licking a stripe on his cock and taking the whole size in your mouth. Younghoon held your hair as you worked your mouth on him, the sounds of slurping and the way the tip would hit the back of your throat made his eyes roll back in pleasure.
You release him with a pop, giving his length a few pumps before straddling his lap and sinking down on his cock without any warning. You both moan at the stretch, but you start rolling your hips not waiting to adjust to his size.
“Baby, slow down for a moment-” He tries to grab your hips but instead you grab his wrists and pin them down against the mattress.
“Not after everything you put me through and lied about it!” You grind on his cock as hard as you can, using all the energy you have to chase your own high. Usually between the two of you, you’re the one that easily breaks. But this time around, it was Younghoon who breaks first .
“How was I supposed to know?! Fuck I think I’m gonna-” Younghoon doesn’t even have time to warn you because he’s already bursting inside you, the hardest he has ever done in his life. But you didn’t care, you were gonna ride him until he started to shake and cry under you.
“Sweetheart wait-” Younghoon starts to bite down on his bottom lip, trying not to let the feeling of his overstimulated cock affect him. But eventually he couldn’t hold it out much longer as you kept on aggressively riding his member.
Tears were falling down his eyes, he had never felt this during sex before, but seeing you angrily fuck the life out of him turned him on so much he ended up cumming inside you again as you finally reached your high.
You collapsed on top of him, panting against his neck as his cock continues to throb inside you. He was about to kiss your temple like he always did, but you suddenly pulled away from him and sat at the edge of the bed, wrapping your arms around yourself as you still try to grasp everything that happened.
But before you could even turn around to face him, Younghoon smothers you with a handkerchief making you fall asleep from the drug once again.
The moment you’re knocked out cold, Younghoon gets up to grab his clothes, dressing himself up before placing your clothes back on too. He adjusts the way you’re lying down on his bed, making sure you’re all comfortable before tracing his finger on your jaw. Looking at your face one last time and placing a kiss on your forehead before he leaves.
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You wake up in your hotel room in a panic, feeling like everything that had happened was a dream. You hold your head in your hand as you feel it aching. You look around to the room and see a tray of your favorite food on a table alongside the pain medication you needed to drink.
You felt so out of it. Maybe it was a dream after all, you told yourself. As you walk over to tray and sit down, you spot a letter beside the drink. You hold it up to see what it was, but your eyes widen at the familiar gold initials at the front of the envelope.
You hastily rip out the paper to look inside the contents of the letter, slouching your back onto the chair. Your heart starts to ache from the many emotions flooding through you, especially with the words written down,
Until we meet again. -Younghoon
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151 notes · View notes
eunseoksimp · 13 days
Text
Golden Boy ; Osaki Shotaro
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Pairings: Bestie!Shotaro x Fem!Reader
Genre: Smut, Angst
Description: Shotaro is everyone’s favourite person. Extremely lovable and kind to those around him, but there’s only so much he can take, especially when you keep pushing his limits.
Warnings: swearing, alcohol consumption, smut, minors dni.
a/n: shotaro’s been heavy on the brain recently, so this is extremely self indulgent.
.   ݁ ˖ ࣪ . ⋆ * .♡ *:・゚.   ݁ ˖ ࣪ . ⋆ * .♡ *:・゚.   ݁ ˖ ࣪ .
‘can someone remind me why we decided to put sohee in charge of the booking?’ chaewon’s irritated tone rang through the room, and anton who was nearby snickered.
‘don’t go laughing like that isn’t your best friend.’
it was finally summer break, bleak winters and stressing in libraries far behind you. so naturally it was right for you and your friend group to plan a getaway for the week.
only, things weren’t going quite to plan. at the start of the month, everyone was assigned with different tasks and unfortunately, sohee was left to book the place you were meant to stay.
but in typical boy fashion, he had chosen something far away from the activities you wanted to do, and the rooms weren’t looking the best either.
‘i told you to leave it up to shotaro, we were doomed from the start,’ you quipped in, the aforementioned boy not too far behind you as he broke into a wide smile.
osaki shotaro was the glue of the friendship. the dependable friend who always planned ahead, and got along well with everyone. you could never catch him without a smile on his face, and everyone else’s comfort was always a priority.
‘i booked us another place, just in case something like this happened. lucky us,’ he basked in everyone’s praises, paying particular attention to the way you patted him on the top of his head.
‘you’re a star taro.’
‘shotaro to the rescue.’
‘what’s wrong with the place i got us,’ sohee grumbled, phone in his hand pitifully as he pretended not to notice that it was in fact better.
‘stop whining and get in the car.’
wonbin and shotaro were the designated drivers, given that sungchan complained about a wrist problem, which he may or may not have been lying about just to get out of being the one behind the wheel.
so it left those two, and the friendship group decided the cars they were getting into based on an alarmingly competitive game of rock paper scissors.
‘yes, i got shotaro,’ you pumped your first in the air after being the second one to win, no longer caring as you hopped into the front seat, barely catching sight of seunghan dramatically dropping to his knees after losing to sungchan.
the journey felt longer than necessary, mainly because wonbin kept getting lost on the way. but your group of you, chaewon, shotaro and sungchan were more than okay because shotaro was the one behind the wheel.
his speed never faltered, skilfully maneuvering the car so that speed bumps were barely felt, and his playlist left you decently entertained, a couple songs that each individual could enjoy in there.
‘remind me to never get into a car with wonbin again,’ anton dramatically hopped out of the car, headphones now around his neck as he pinched the bridge of his nose.
‘oh come on, it wasn’t that bad,’ wonbin was the last to get out, keys in hand.
he had only gotten his license last month, but you had witnessed him almost reverse into the metal pole in front of your house, and instantly knew you were in no rush to be riding with him any time soon.
‘my poor baby, did the big bad diva scare you?’ you cooed, and anton played into it, jokingly sniffling as he dropped his head to your shoulder.
‘at least i have a license. not all of us can rely on shotaro to drive you places,’ he fires back, narrowing his eyes at the both of you.
‘don’t be jealous because i’m treated like the princess you so badly want to be.’
but he was right. your parents had nagged for months, wondering why you weren’t even trying to study for a drivers test. but why would you need to when shotaro would be there at a drop of a pen.
‘i’ll take you wherever you want to go,’ he told you last year when he first got his license, and he stuck to his word, picking you up and dropping you off whenever you needed. if he wasn’t available he would ask eunseok, who would complain about gas prices and leaving his warm home, but still come and get you anyway.
you were spoiled.
‘i’ve got your bags, let’s go in,’ shotaro passes by, your luggage juggled between two hands as he already makes his way through the now opened door, courtesy of sungchan.
the villa was beautiful, a dream vacation home, equipped with marble tiles and panoramic views. the kitchen was as wide as your living room, the appliances new and countertop squeaky clean.
‘maybe shotaro was on to something,’ sohee accepted defeat, that once again shotaro was the best man for the job and you all agreed.
excited to be away from the loud bustle of the city, you were the first one to slide the doors open and step into the patio, a huge pool greeting you.
this was going to be fun.
you felt another presence beside you, the familiar tufts of blonde hair coming in to view.
‘i put your stuff in your room, you’re sharing with chaewon,’ you grinned, drawing nearer to press a kiss on his cheek.
‘thanks taro, you’re the best,’ the blush on his cheeks only made you smile wider. he was too cute.
‘just doing my job.’
and that was what he continued to do. he was there when you spoke about craving pancakes the night before, waking up early to drive to the grocery store just to get you what was needed.
when you got out of the shower, lazily walking though the house and flopping onto the couch, he held your head in his lap as he dried your hair.
opening car doors, doing your seatbelt, holding your hand as you walked through the rocky beach. but not just you.
‘shotaro you should drive to the grocery store.’
‘shotaro can you call the guide and tell him we’re going to be late.’
‘shotaro i’m hungry can you make me some food?’
shotaro, shotaro, shotaro.
his smiley disposition made it harder for his friends to notice just how far they were pushing him. he didn’t mind helping others, but it was beginning to take a toll on him.
his energy slowly depletes, and on the last night of the trip he plops onto the couch, sighing as he tilts his head back.
how long could he keep his act up?
it wasn’t like he was a sociopath or anything, he did truly like his friends and loved that they relied on him, only showing off just how dependable he was.
but it all added up to the image that everyone had of him. the cute golden retriever, who needed to be babied and coddled, because he was too ‘innocent for this world.’
conversations about sex were often paused, with jokes about him not being able to handle it being thrown left and right.
he was always being hounded about the fact that not many girls seemed to linger around him.
‘you know how shotaro is, he’s probably just shy.’
the first time seunghan saw a girl leave your room one morning it became the topic of conversation for the next week.
‘how did you manage to do that? did you start crying half way through? my bet is you only lasted one minute.’
the friendship group was very oddly sexually charged. of course you never made advances towards each other, but your closeness permitted each other to talk about everything. in great detail.
and when shotaro wouldn’t feel comfortable sharing what happened, they just believed their assumptions were correct, cooing and teasing him.
he didn’t mind as much, after all he was sure that a lot of it were just jokes. it wasn’t like he wanted to stop hiding his desires anytime soon anyways.
‘we’re playing a game, courtesy of our little friend,’ your voice snapped him out of his thoughts, soju bottles in both of your hands as you sank down into the seat next to him.
thus started an alcohol fuelled session of truth or dare. for the most part the asks and dares were fairly tame; text the last person you messaged that you missed them, down 5 shots in under a minute.
quickly it was your turn again, and it was clear that the effects of the sweet liquor was seeping into your behaviour.
‘if you had to fuck one person in this room, who would it be?,’ chaewon slurred her words, eyes barely open as she points right at you.
you tap your chin, as if you’re actually giving great consideration to the question, before going through everyone in the circle.
‘hmm let’s see. eunseok has too much of a god complex, he’d probably moan his own name. respectfully sungchan has a girlfriend so pass. i think anton might call me mommy unironically, probably cry too. wonbin loves himself too much, same as eunseok. i only see sohee and seunghan like my little brothers.’
everyone laughed along, some protests thrown your way from eunseok and wonbin, but only one person sat waiting eagerly, the only persons name you didn’t mention. did that mean he was the one?
‘wait you skipped shotaro,’ anton called out, holding up six fingers.
‘did i?’
‘yeah you spoke about everyone else here but him.’
‘probably just a subconscious thing. my mind knew he wasn’t an option,’ you shrugged.
ouch.
‘why not?’ everyone waited expectantly as they watched you. it was no secret that the both of you were extremely close, so it wouldn’t be strange if you had thought about it before.
‘too boring,’ your answer was short, like it was something so obvious, not even worthy of debate. chaewon snorts, soju shooting out of her nose but she covers her mouth, because she knows exactly what you’re talking about.
‘what do you mean,’ shotaro speaks up finally, and for a split second the air feels tense. everyone thought he would just laugh it off, like he usually would, but he was the only one that looked serious.
‘you’re just too vanilla for me babe, no hard feelings.’
his jaw ticks, eyebrows furrowed as he processes what you said.
‘are you sure? you haven’t been- laid in a long time. i personally think shotaro would be a great fuck,’ sungchan vouches for his best friend, although the weight of his judgement was seriously downplayed by the fact that he couldn’t even keep his head up.
‘osaki shotaro? the most vanilla guy on this planet? i’ll pass,’ you’re doubling down on your statement, and it only emphasises the way you view him.
‘i’m not vanilla, stop saying that’ shotaro retorts, the laughter of everyone else in the room causing
his head to spin.
‘sure you aren’t babe. and i’m not the hottest bitch in this friend group,’ you pat his thigh.
your words linger in his mind. vanilla? he was far from it. if only you knew the dirty thoughts that circled his mind.
he was so sick of everyone coddling him, treating him like a little virgin boy, a novice at the act.
just because he wasn’t as vocal about his experiences as the rest of you guys were, doesn’t mean they didn’t happen at all.
he allows it to eat at his mind for the rest of
the night, and you continued to only make it worse for him.
‘stop touching each other, gross. poor shotaro doesn’t even know what to do.’
strike one.
someone could literally run over his dog and he would probably apologise. biggest pushover in the universe.
strike two.
he’s definitely got golden retriever energy. i just pity the girl who tries to start anything sexual with him, he’ll probably freak the fuck out.
strike three.
his blood was boiling, a dull thump ringing in his ears. his hands were turning white, the way he had continuously clenched and unclenched his fists.
what was so wrong with being a good guy? must everyone display on their foreheads the freaky shit they like to get up to in their free time.
‘tell them- tell the guys what you said to me yesterday,’ chaewon sat on wonbin’s lap, practically screaming in his ear as he winced, slapping a hand over her mouth.
‘about what? that shotaro has a small dick?’
you’re out.
the alcohol had clearly gotten to you, your mouth a lot more sharp as it lacked the ability to filter the things you were saying. it was obviously a joke to you, you couldn’t care less if it was big or not, it wasn’t like you were ever going to fuck him.
‘come find out if it’s really small,’ he glares, the words sharp on his tongue, but you couldn’t take him seriously.
‘who let shotaro loose.’
all the teasing does nothing to quell his anger. is this the image everyone had of him? a small dicked pushover? if only they knew.
the mind of shotaro osaki was dark. riddled with lust and mean thoughts, but he kept them all at bay. ever since he was in high school he figured he would scare people away if they knew how he truly felt, what truly kept him up at night?
one by one everyone reached their limits, retreating to their beds for the night, a stumbling mess.
but you sat there, empty bottle in hand, head pounding as you tried to sober up a little. you hadn’t even realised you had dozed off, not until you woke up and were met with a semi dark room, completely silent.
shotaro’s jumper was draped over you, and a glass of water and some tablets were placed on the table in front of you. appreciative, you guzzle the cool water down, loving the way it soothes your throat.
you would have thought you were alone if it wasn’t for shotaro’s hunched over figure in the corner of the room, almost scaring you shitless.
‘taro, are you okay?’ you call out.
he lifts his head, seeing that you’re awake and rises to his feet, completely ignoring your question.
‘my room. now’
he left no time for you to protest, already walking towards the room he had to himself, as you trailed behind nervously.
this was the first time you’d ever seen him so angry, and you feared that you might have taken it too far this time.
you racked your brain, thinking of the right things to say, anything to bring back your friends usual self.
he waited for you to come inside before closing the door behind you, and you heard a click.
‘shotaro i-‘
‘i didn’t ask you to speak.’
you froze in shock, not used to his tone of voice, and you almost craned your neck around to see if he was talking to someone else.
he stalked closer to you, stopping right in front, only inches apart.
‘is this what you would call small,’ in an instant he has your small hand in his, guiding it towards the print in his trousers and you gasp in shock, jumping back.
it was huge, enough to make you swallow your words and bite your lip as your mind runs rampant.
‘you know, everyone expects me to be some type of angel sent from heaven or something. i’m at everyone beck and call, innocent little shotaro who will do anything you ask. he’s too nice to know anything, he’s probably a virgin.’
‘it pisses me off. especially hearing you do it.’
‘it was-‘
‘stop.fucking.talking,’ he’s livid, enunciating each word and he’s soon got you backed up, edging closer and closer to the edge of his bed.
‘you’re a fucking brat, you know that. i do all these things for you and this is how you repay me? brats like you need a good fuck to get their minds straight. don’t you?’
you’re at a loss of words, trying to figure out how the sweet, lovable shotaro that you know is now looking down at you with a twist of malice and lust. but more importantly, why was it sending a shiver down your spine, squeezing your legs together as you gulp.
he notices, and he chuckles, running a hand over his face, ‘i fucking knew it.’
in one swift movement you were on your back, back hitting the mattress hard, but you have no opportunity to adjust as shotaro settles over you.
‘no hard feelings babe, i’ve got a lot of anger built up inside of me. you’ll let me take it out on you, yeah?’
you nod dumbly, thinking nothing of his words, expecting nothing too crazy. but boy were you wrong.
that’s how you found yourself in your current position shaking with pleasure and pain. twitching, sniffling, and trying to get away but he won’t let you escape so you resort to begging and pleading.
‘please im sorry, im sorry please just-‘ you can’t even finish your sentence, another moan ripping through your throat and you blink rapidly, the tears sticking to your eyelashes, that had been building up for the past couple of minutes, began to fall.
you hope that he’d see your current state, take mercy on you and eventually ease himself out of you. but the tears only encourage him to see how messy you could really get.
‘don’t cry now- fucking take it,’ he’s ruthless, your legs are pushed back, further and further till they’re almost reaching your ears, and the new angle makes you feel him even more.
‘take it, take it, take it,’ his hips snap viciously into yours, practically splitting you open as you use all the strength you can muster to push away, your palm flat against his pelvis as you shake your head.
‘move your fucking hand,’ he doesn’t slow down, looking down at your weak attempt to get him to stop.
‘taro-taro please- i-‘
‘i didn’t ask you to fucking speak did i? just shut the fuck up and take it,’ he delivers a harsh slap to your cheek, and although it stings, it makes you start to cream around him.
‘look at you, like a dumb fucking slut. cant even use your words, just panting like a bitch in heat.’
‘stupid slut, you like when i call you names and throw you around. such a fuck-fucking whore,’ you’re squeezing him, tighter and tighter as you feel your third orgasm of the night approaching you.
shotaro had spent the majority of your friendship lending his ears to all your sex stories, slightly jealous when he heard all about how much you loved it rough.
but now he didn’t have to fuck other girls and pretend they were you, he had the real thing right in front of him.
‘fuck-fuck-fuck,’ you chant, practically floating as you feel so close. he’s fucking you so good, so deep that you’re sure his dick will leave a permanent imprint in your pussy.
‘look me in the eye, there you go. look at me while you- shit. while you make a mess all over my cock,’ he’s dipping his head lower, till your noses are practically bumping against each other, wanting to see for himself how he destroys you.
you don’t last much longer, a couple of rubs to your clit and you feel the coil in your stomach snap as your head hangs back, lips parted as you convulse under him.
you expected that to be the end, for him to at least slow down, but he does nothing of the sort, overstimulating you till you’re practically wrestling out of his grip, legs giving out as a string of curses escape your lips.
‘n-n-no more. please taro,’ it’s getting harder for you to breathe, the grip he has on your throat and hip simultaneously giving you no chance of escaping.
‘aww but i thought this was what you wanted? getting fucked stupid, that’s why you said isn’t it,’ the smile that used to bring you comfort was now making you shiver, something so sinister about the way he looked down at you.
‘i can’t anymore. p-please taro let me go.’
‘i’m not done with you yet,’ you see the evil glint in his eye, as he flips you over, forcibly pushing down onto your spine until you arch perfectly for him.
you find yourself crying once again, overwhelmed as you scrunch the sheets between your hand, needing something to ground you.
‘you say you don’t want it but look how that pussy’s squeezing for me,’ it’s hard to believe such filthy words are leaving shotaro’s lips.
‘who’s got you so wet?’
‘fuck baby, do you feel that?’
digging his nails now into the skin of your hips. your eyes roll back as you feel the head of his cock now pressing up against your cervix with each brutal, angry thrust.
‘who’s fucking you this good? let the whole house hear it.’
you shake your head, biting your bottom lip so hard it draws blood as you desperately try not to scream but shotaro has other plans.
‘what did i just fucking say? huh?’ he wraps his hand around your hair, yanking you up until his lips are right by your ears.
your senses are overwhelmed as you try oh so hard to contain yourself, clenching around him even harder.
‘shit, you taro. fucking me so good’ you whine so loudly, you’re sure that the neighbours would be able to hear.
it’s all becoming too much for you, your eyes unfocusing, rolling behind your head. head buried in the pillows, throat sore as you shake your head from side to side
your hands snake out from underneath your head in an attempt to slow him down but it’s no use. it makes him go even faster, even deeper as he holds your wrists between his hands.
“tsk, i thought i taught you better than that, princess,” shotaro quips, the condescending tone sending waves of heat up your spine.
the squelching noises gradually increasing, the sounds you were making were filthy and it wouldn’t take a genius to figure out what was going on.
but other people walking in on you two was the least of your concerns. it was hard to conjure up a single thought, the way shotaro is pummelling into you overtaking ever single sense.
you could barely hold yourself up anymore, leaning all of your weight into shotaro, legs and mind numb, as you let him degrade you even more, leading you to yet another orgasm.
only this one feels a little different. he was hitting the spot, over and over again, practically drilling into you and you felt an immense amount of tingling in your bottom half.
‘taro- oh fuck- you have to-have to stop. i think-shit i think i need to pee.’
you’re embarrassed, scared that if he doesn’t listen to you that you might end up urinating all over him. but he doesn’t care, nor does he stop.
you hit his thigh repeatedly, shaking your head as you desperately try to get away from him, but he’s much stronger than you, his arms wrapping around your waist, holding you there as he continues.
you felt so full, the pressure only increasing with each thrust as you practically grow limp in his arms. a squeal leaves your lips, followed by a large volume of clear liquid, soaking both you and shotaro, all over his thighs and seeping into the sheets underneath you both.
‘there we go, knew you could do it,’ he groans, unable to take his eyes away from the pool of cum, obsessed with how you were both covered in it.
he wants to make you do it again, to tease you and draw another orgasm out of you, but you’re well spent, twitching in his arms as you mumble.
‘no more- no more.’
although he knew he could go for two more rounds if he really wanted to, he respected the way your body was telling him that you were done.
‘shhh it’s alright. i’ve got you baby,’ he lifts you off of him, sweat coating your body as you cling onto him.
and then you pass out, unable to carry on anymore, letting shotaro take care of you as he cleans you up, then tucks you in your own bed, whispering some excuse to chaewon about finding you asleep on the couch by yourself when she stirs from her sleep.
then he’s back to his normal self, smiling widely as he watches everyone take their seat at the table, busying himself by the stove.
you were the last one to arrive, barely able to walk, legs practically jelly as you take small steps.
‘what happened to you?’ sungchan quipped, but you were too busy trying to relearn how to work with the newfound ache in your legs to give him a suitable comeback.
if it wasn’t for the effects you were feeling from last night, you would chalk it all down to being an extremely vivid wet dream.
but there was no mistake, shotaro osaki fucked you within an inch of your life yesterday night. and judging by the smirk on his lips, his eyes following your every moment, something tells you it wouldn’t be the last time.
guess he wasn’t such a golden boy after all.
146 notes · View notes
hischierswhore · 11 months
Text
you’re losing me
based on “You’re Losing Me” by Taylor Swift
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pairing: Mason Mount x Reader
tw: cursing // mentions of a proposal
a/n: is this good? probably not, but this song makes me sad whenever i listen to it so i just wrote how i pictured a scenario like this going in real life
note: all references to the song will be italicized and lyrics are bolded
You had been dating your boyfriend, Mason, for almost 6 years. You both met all those years ago while you were in England studying abroad. You guys took things slow, and eventually became much more serious about your relationship and nearly 2 years ago you moved in together.
All was great, and you both tried to make time for each other as often as possible, but lately things felt off. Mason was always busy with training, which you understood as it was his job, but he would come home completely drained and not in the mood to do anything with you.
Even while being in the same room, he would barely bat an eyelash at the sight of you entering the room.
“Hey, Mase. Can we talk?” You asked one day as you sat down next to him on the couch. His eyes were still glued to the TV screen in-front of him, but he nodded his head as if signaling for you to keep talking.
“Is everything okay with us?”
“Yeah why?” His gaze moves to you, his eyebrows are scrunched and a confused look is etched across his face. You audibly sigh at his obliviousness.
“Things haven’t been the same, Mase. You’ve been acting off and I’m just trying to figure out why things don’t feel the same”
“We’re fine. Just been busy with football and stressed about the contract” He says as he turns his attention back to the large screen, drowning out any possibility of further conversation taking place. You sigh as you get up and walk out of the room, annoyed as your boyfriend won’t make any effort to resolve the problems in your relationship.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Weeks passed and Mason was as stressed as before, and you felt like you were coming second to his job. You tried to be understanding, but it was hard. You missed the way things used to be between you both.
There was an important event Mason had to attend tonight, and he brought you with him as his date. You wore a beautifully fitted maroon dress, one that was sure to grab Mason’s attention.
Mason was at Carlotta’s studio as she was styling him for the evening, so you both agreed to meet at the venue.
Upon your arrival, you met up with Sophia & Andrea.
“Where’s Mason?” Sophia asked.
“Oh he’s on his way. He sent me a text a few minutes ago” You smiled in attempt to reassure not only them, but also yourself that everything was fine.
“You guys are such a perfect couple. We’re waiting for the day you guys get engaged” Andrea smiled at you as you tried to fake a smile.
After dating for 6 years, people always say things like this: that they’re waiting for day that he proposes to you. Sure, some people wait even longer, but according to his friends & family, he’s always wanted to get married especially to you. You wondered why he hadn’t proposed yet, but you always ignored the thought and focused on the moment.
Minutes later, Mason arrived at the event. You knew because of the hoard of paparazzi & interviewers racing to take pictures of him and interview him before he entered the event.
You touched up your makeup before making your way to the group you were most familiar with, as it was a mix of your boyfriend, his teammates & their girlfriends/wives. You’d grown close with the group over the years.
As you walked over, all eyes were on you, except for the ones you wanted to be on you: Mason’s. He was too indulged in conversation with someone you’ve never seen before, and they certainly weren’t part of your group.
You sparked conversation with everyone else in the meantime, mentally planning how to make Mason see that you were worth his time.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
As your group sat down to eat at your assigned table, you could tell that Mason was distracted. You were honestly tired of it, and everyone could see that something was up. Just as Mason excused himself to go to the restroom, Christian spoke up.
“Hey Y/n… is everything alright?” Christian asked. He had always been so kind to you, and you considered him like a brother to you.
“Everything’s fine” You lied, plastering a fake smile to your face as you hoped nobody would believe otherwise.
“What’s up with him? He hasn’t been his usual outgoing self” Kai asked and you could simply shrug.
“No idea”
“Have you tried asking him?” Andrea added and you nodded your head at her question.
“He just brushed it off. I’m trying with this relationship, I really am, and I feel like he’s just given up on us” Everyone gave you sympathetic looks and comforting smiles.
“I’m so sorry, Y/n” Was all anyone could say after hearing what you’d told them.
Mason came back moments later, sitting with the rest of the group, clueless that you’d slightly vented to them about your relationship troubles.
There was an opportunity to dance near the end of the event, and you thought it would be a good chance to talk to Mason.
“Dance with me?” You asked, the hope behind your eyes shining brightly until you watched him shake his head.
“I’m tired, love. Go dance with Chris or something” Your face dropped at his words, disappointment and sadness appeared visible on your features as you turned and made your way to the bathroom.
Sophia & Andrea watched the encounter from across the table. Without a single words, both girls got up and made their way to the bathroom, knowing you would need some comfort.
You didn’t even make it to the bathroom before the tears started flowing. You rested against the wall that was hidden from view and slid down, pulling your knees into your chest as tears streamed down your face.
Sophia & Andrea appeared at that moment, crouching down with you. Andrea went to hold your hand and you jumped at the sudden contact.
“Sorry” Andrea mouthed as she sat down fully next to you, with Sophia doing the same.
“It’s okay, Y/n, just let it all out” Sophia said as she rubbed your back gently in attempt to comfort you.
“I’m drained, Soph. I’m trying my hardest to fix this relationship and he’s not even putting effort in. I was hoping to at least get something out of him tonight, some sort of sign that he’s willing to help, but nothings worked. I just wanted him to see me. Not just physically, but emotionally” Andrea handed you a tissue at that moment, allowing you to wipe the flowing mascara from ruining your makeup for the evening.
“It’s just embarrassing. He just turned me down in-front of everyone. My own boyfriend turned me down in a room full of people” Both girls brought you in for a hug.
“I’m really just tired of giving him signs that I’m fighting this battle alone, only for him to ignore them and just keep adding onto the mess that we call a relationship”
“We’re so sorry, Y/n. You of all people don’t deserve this. Try talking to him again, and if nothing works, you tried. You held up your end for as long as you could, and that’s enough. You are enough” You thanked both girls before heading back to the main room and heading to your table.
You didn’t sit next to Mason, but rather the girls and spoke to them. Your encounter with him ruined your night and you weren’t in the mood to speak to him.
Christian made his way back to the table and saw you sitting far from your boyfriend. He gave you a questioning look and you mouthed “I’ll tell you later” to him. He nodded and sat next to you, joining the conversation.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
After explaining to Christian what was going on, he was beyond furious with his teammate. You weren’t necessarily in the mood to be near your boyfriend for the time being, but you wanted to go home. Christian offered to drive you back to the apartment you shared with Mason, which you graciously accepted.
You sent Mason a quick text to let him know that you had left and that you would be at home whenever he decided to come back. He read your text but didn’t respond.
You thanked Christian for the ride and he wished you good luck in your impending conversation with Mason.
You settled into the guest room in your apartment, getting under the covers and falling asleep with no issue.
About two hours later you heard the front door open and close, insinuating that Mason was home. You didn’t move; you wanted to see if he would even come looking for you.
News flash; he didn’t. He went straight to your bedroom and fell asleep, not a single thought of you & where you might be passed through his brain.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Every mornin', I glared at you with storms in my eyes
How can you say that you love someone you can't tell is dyin'?
I sent you signals and bit my nails down to the quick
My face was gray, but you wouldn't admit that we were sick
The next morning you woke up early. You got up to make yourself coffee/tea (your preference) and a turkey&bacon sandwich to eat as you were rather starving. You saw movement from the corner of your eye and you saw Mason standing there as he watched you.
From his perspective, he had never seen anything scarier than the look in your eyes. You glared at him with storms brewing in your eyes. He had never seen someone so stoic before in his life. He watched as you made eye contact and immediately went back to sipping your drink & eating your sandwich.
He didn’t take the hint and still did his everyday routine.
“Good morning, love” He spoke as he pressed a quick kiss to the top of your head. The nickname only filled you with rage. He hadn’t said the three words you longed to hear in weeks, possibly even months. You felt your face turn gray as your body tensed at the contact.
“We need to talk” You spoke, not a single emotion laced through your words. You were serious. Mason slowly made his way to sit in-front of you.
How long could we be a sad song
'Til we were too far gone to bring back to life?
I gave you all my best me's, my endless empathy
And all I did was bleed as I tried to be the bravest soldier
Fighting in only your army, frontlines, don't you ignore me
I'm the best thing at this party (You're losin' me)
“I can’t continue living like this, Mason. We’ve put this off- no. You’ve put this conversation off for long enough. I’ve given you everything I’ve got. Every last ounce of hope I had for us is gone. I’ve tried, I really have tried to be the bravest soldier to fight for us, to keep us strong but I can’t anymore”
“I don’t understand” He said.
“I know you don’t. Last night, I tried so hard to get you to see me, not just physically, but emotionally as well. Fuck, Mason, you didn’t even think to compliment me at all. In fact, you barely even spoke to me. You practically ignored me the entire night. I dressed up for you. I wanted some small ounce of attention from you, in hopes that it’ll signal that maybe you did want to help me fix this, fix us”
“So you’re upset because I didn’t give you attention last night?”
“Oh my god!” You screamed. You were beyond annoyed with this man not taking any hints. You’re being straightforward and he’s just not seeing it.
And I wouldn't marry me either
A pathological people pleaser
Who only wanted you to see her
“What’s going on? Are you just tired of this relationship? Are you tired of me? Are you not wanting us to go forward because you’re afraid of a potential proposal and what our future will look like? I need to know, Mason, because frankly I’ve given up on trying to make this work”
“I’m not ready for the future…”
“Mason that’s understandable, nobody is-”
“…with you…”
“You’re not ready for a future with me? As in, you don’t want to marry me in the future?” You asked he slowly nods his head. You stayed silent for a moment as you took it all in. After a few minutes, you spoke.
“So basically for god knows how long, I’ve been fighting for us to work when you weren’t even happy in this relationship?” He didn’t move. A thick silence filled the air around you.
And I'm fadin', thinkin'
"Do something, babe, say something”
"Lose something, babe, risk something"
"Choose something, babe, I got nothing"
"To believe, unless you're choosin' me"
“I’ll take your silence as a yes then. I won’t waste anymore of both your & my time, Mason. I’ll have my things out of here by the end of the day” And with that, you grabbed your phone from the table and walked out of the kitchen, quickly grabbing a suitcase and a few boxes and started piling your belongings into them.
He didn’t move. He didn’t try to stop you. He just sat there and watched you leave.
Stop, you’re losing me
I cant find a pulse
My heart won’t start anymore
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
taglist
@ithinkimokeei @myheartgoesvroom @mounthings @tall-tanned-tattoo @itsnotgray @alwaysclassyeagle @charlewiss @mortirolo @fallingin20 @chelseagirl98 @lovelynikol16 @username-envy @swimmingismywholelife @pulisicsgirl @notsoattractivearenti @pulisichavertz @fernandezology @bracedes @neverinadream @thoseboysinblue @winterbarnesblog @chaotic-taco-collector-blog
484 notes · View notes
sliceofajayke · 10 months
Text
enhypen as dads
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here are some headcannons on how i think enha will be as dads :)
warnings; babies, talk of pregnancy, theres a mention of sex in hoons but nothing graphic.. thats all i think but plz lemme know if you see anything that should be added<3
likes, comments and reblogs are much appreciated<3
heeseung <3
-okok right from the beginning, when he had first found out u were preggers he started singing to ur belly
-and at night he cant sleep and he thinks ur asleep he'll talk to ur belly
-like if ure having really bad morning sickness he'll be like
-"hey baby,, i know ur growing in there but please dont give ur momma too much of hard time... we love you forever and always and we can't wait for you to get here"
-and suddenly the next day you got no morning sickness!! so hee kisses ur belly "thank u baby u always listen to dada huh?"
-okay now for gender. reveal!! he doesnt care if the baby is a boy or a girl
-he just wants to be able to hold his baby in his arms, and he got sososo excited when the doctor told yall so the doctor asks "oh were you hoping for a girl?"(first one is girl i feel like theyll all be really good girl dads)
-and u giggle "he wasnt hoping for anything specific. hes just happy that were this far along cuz that mean babes coming out soon"
-and we'll skip to birth. hee has done so much reading on parenting books, and all that jazz
-but when babygirl finally comes hes in tears and forgot everything he read. hes just too happy. he sees you holding his baby and he thinks, despite the sweat and tears. this is the most beautiful you look because you have been so strong and brave through out the whole process
-u call him over and ask if hes ready to hold her and something snaps in him "oh um... can i??"
- he just got so worried?? for some reason?? so the nurse smiles and tells him to go sit on the chair so she can pass her to him and while sitting he remembers skin to skin right right
-so he takes off his shirt and when baby is in the nurses arms she starts crying soso hard,
- but once baby was place into hees arms and lying on his bare chest she immediately stops "oh babygirl... hi its dada"
-and ik babies dont really smile unless they're pooping or smthng but the baby smiles at him with her eyes closed
-skip to her first everything,, hee has it all filmed, her first steps, her first taste of solid food, any of her first, you name it
-he'll be one of those dads who are sososo encouraging of every single thing she does
-(even if shes bad at it... "who cares what they say. if you like doing it then continue doing it. only quit if its for yourself not for them")
-shes a lovely singer, she'll somehow remember the songs hee would sing to her while she was in mommas belly and when she was a baby
-he'll cry when shes 10 years old because "my baby... shes not a baby anymore shes in her double digits:((" and she'll hug him even if she feels embarrassed and whispers to him "dont worry dad. i wont be a baby forever. but i'll always be your girl"
-thats what he calls her "my girl" he originally called u that
-and he still does,, whenever he gets home he goes "where are my girls?" or if his babygirl wins something he goes "thats my girl!"
-hes just a really good supportive dad:(( she'll even go to both her parents if shes having relationship problems because she can trust them and they are very trusting of her
jay <3
-ok so jay i think u’d just tell him straight up that ur pregnant
-u guys have been trying for a while and it finally happened so he was very very happy
-i think jay will also talk to ur belly
-he’ll tell baby a lot of random fun facts
-even tell baby about how big/small they are at the moment
-when baby comes hes just ready for it all.
-hes very encouraging of you, tells you that you did amazing before even taking a look at the crying baby
-finally when its his turn to hold his babyboy hes ready.
-the nurse takes the baby from ur arms and tells jay he can either stand or sit on the couch, he prefers to stand
-so he takes off his shirt and holds his arms out for baby
-jay cries while looking at his baby
- so baby is a bit older now, like hee. jay films all the firsts… and seconds
-baby is really smart too
-jay actually got his son an ipad
-but the kid is NOT an ipad kid, he’s actually very very good at time management???
-all the games on the kids ipad are actually some kind of learning games (reading apps, those crossword games, etc.)
-jay loves cooking and so does his son.
-it started from watching his dad cook
-to mixing the soup on the stove
-and finally to just jay watching and tell him what to do/add next
-actually on mothers day and ur birthday they’ll make u breakfast in bed
-their bond is very good<3
jake <3
-so lets say u nd jake already have some fur babies
-yall got two doggo okok so u dress them up wearing those ‘best big sister’ nd ‘best big brother’ sweaters
- “go to daddy” so they do:)
-with u following them slowly so you can see his reaction and he baby talks the dogs lol
-”now what are u silly babies wearing?”
-he takes them both on his lap and his eyes widened when he was able to read it,,
-the pups jump off his lap cuz jake sounded excited so they want to be excited too!!
-”no way…” he goes to run to you nd tbh he almost ran into you so he hugged u
-”is this for real? plz dont be a sick joke”
-”of course its real!”
-he kisses you
-a lot
-he kisses all over ur face nd all over ur belly
-so for this ultrasound its pretty late into the pregnancy and suddenly there are two heartbeat
-”oUR BABY HAS TWO HEARTS?!?”
- both u and the doctor laugh and tell him that has to mean twins
-so u guys go home and suddenly panic arises again
-”....i need to redesign the babyroom”
-u guys have a boy and a girl <3
- so both are very into music and sports
- he teaches them everything he knows and he loves loves LOVES bragging about his kids
- he doesn't do it on purpose but..
- heeseung is telling the group about how his daughter won at her school talent show and jake cant help but mention his kids
-”ohhh *son and daughter* love singing too! actually they’ve been practicing as a duo wanna see a video?!” (he’ll pull out the video before anyone can even say yes)
-hes very good at helping them regulate their emotions too, he lets them feel what it is and lets them talk about them openly
-he never raises his voice at them and if by chance his kids get so angry that they raise their voice at him??
-they’ll immediately apologize because they know its wrong and they’ll say that they promise to do their best not to do it again
-kids are hard especially if theres two the same age
-they argue a lot
- A LOT
- they always make up very quickly, jake and u don’t even have to interfere.
- BUT when u do have to interfere that means it gets really bad
- idk theyre kids so lets say they broke eachothers crayon :(
-both are crazy mad at each other, daughter is a daddys girl, son is a mommys boy
-first move as parents; get them to stop crying
-second to figure out why it all started
- “we wanted to share but we got mad”
- (y'all bought them each a set of crayons…)
- in the end, they make up and showed u their shared drawing of their family… with an extra member
“mommy and daddy we want a baby sibling”
sunghoon <3
-ok hoon wants a baby soooo bad
- he’ll always send u tiktoks of babies and their familes that show up on his fyp and goes like “could be us soon”
-what he doesn't know is that u are pregnant
-idk why u thought he wouldnt want a baby but thats what u thought
-anyway u talk to jay nd ur like “how tf do i tell him?? what if he doesnt want a baby?”
-*que sunghoon sending u another baby related tiktok*
-jay goes “... he spams u with baby and family tiktoks u really think he doesnt want that??”
-”maybe??” anyway so now u go home, thinking instead of how to tell him, not of a bad reaction from him
-finally u thought of it
-make a tiktok revealing it(not posting it publicly just yet. u just saved it to ur phone)
-tiktok is pictures with music first, pictures from ur first date, …post sex selfie(its a cute one ok like ur both smiley) of the date you most likely conceived baby
-then it comes to videos, theres one where u guys were making dinner and started dancing together,
-one where u guys are just smiling at the camera together then he attacks u w kisses
-finally the reveal of the pregnancy test and u at the end saying “im pregnant”
-so you send him that video while ur in the kitchen and hes on the couch living room
the text read “babe look at this cute baby video!!” and he clicks it so fast
-he watched it one… two… three more times and hes crying by the end of it
-”i love you so much!!”
-baby is now born and hes just the happiest hes ever been
-he has a baby boy:((
-i think he’ll record everything and anything his kid does and saves it all until his son is of age to consent to his parents to post his baby photos/videos
-his son loves it lol, he actually encouraged his dad to make an instagram for him so when hes old enough to post on his own he’ll post on that account
-but sunghoons account is basically u, his son, family photos and like a selfie every now and then
-he’ll encourage his son to do everything he wants.
-ur son wants to sing?? sunghoon will bring him to the studio and let him record a bit
-he wants to play soccer?? he’ll go to every single practice day and night
-he wants to ice skate?? hoon will be the best coach
-hoon will never ever force him though. if his kid wants out he’ll try to encourage them to keep trying but if they really dont want it, its over then
-hoon rememinds them if they ever wanna try again that they always can
-by the time his son is a teenager, hoon likes to think of himself as a dad and a friend
-so when his son comes to him with a problem hoon will ask “do you want dad advice first or friend advice first?”
-he’ll always give advice from both perspectives too so his son makes the final decisions on things based on that
-anytime u are out for business, they’ll have movie nights nd fall asleep on the couch together, ur sons head on hoons shoulder and hoons head resting ontop ur sons head<3
sunoo <3
-ok honestly see sunoo as such a good girl dad:((
-he found out u were pregnant before u even did lol
-he made u ur favorite food but u didnt want to eat it so he was like “???”
-he gets excited then says “i’ll be right back!”
-he left to get u take out and to buy some pregnancy tests. he lets u eat first then shows u the tests
-”if u arent we could always try again,, but i’m pretty sure u are” so u took a few
-all were positive
-sunoo smiles the biggest u’ve ever seen him smile
-he picks u up nd twirls u around
-so now ur going to ur 5 months ultrasound, u want to have a gender reveal party but sunoo just wants to know(he does want to have a party tho)
-he jokes with the doctor “if i slip u a signed photo card will u tell me the gender” that earned him a smack from u lol
-u give the envelope with the gender to two j’s cuz they volunteered the fastest
-as much as u guys like the whole blue for boy and pink for girls,, u didnt want that to be the colours so u did purple for girls and orange for boys
-jake and jay made cupcakes but somehow made them all brown…
-they forgot the food colouring lol
-anyway they whispered it to sunoo and sunoo begins to jump around “A BABY GIRRLLL”
-so now the birthing… sun couldnt control his face, this was a beautiful moment but gosh did it look…
-not so beautiful, but his babygirl is here!!
-after a little bit u tell him to lie next to u, he said there was no room so u made room
-”now there is room. lets look at our babygirl together” <3
-now her first birthday,,, sunoo couldnt help himself, he calls her princess so it was princess themed!
-she looked so cute in pigtails, her tiara and of course her little purple princess dress:((
-he also records everything at the party, hes vlogging it all
-so she grows up a bit nd he shows her the video as he does her hair
-”did mom do my hair or did u?” “ i did isnt it obvious?”
-“...dang dad thank goodness u got better at this” “excuse me young lady?” they laugh
-anyway now ur girl is hmm 16
-sunoo still calls her princess and she loves it. she gets princess treatment
-sometimes they even kick u out of the front seat so she sit beside her dad as she drives🤭🤭
jungwon <3
-wonie loves loves kids
-when he goes to film some content with kids he LOVES to send u little videos and pictures of him and the kids hes filming with
-when he gets home, u nd the 6 boys are there. u planned it all together
-so u ask him to check the oven cuz ur baking(u didn't actually bake it, u bought it lol)
-”babe its not even hot… are u sure u baked?”
-"oh wonnnie what did you just do?”
“...take bread out of the oven?”
-”jungwon its buns.. theres buns in the oven”
-”..what does that even mean”
-”...shES PREGENT WON.. BUN IN THE OVEN!!”
- he dropped the bread lol
-finally when it registered in his mind he ran to u nd hugged u “but why did u tell them first??”
-okay baby is born and hes in tears
-”are you okay?...our baby is crying and the doctors and nurses got him rn.” he says wiping ur hair out of ur face
-”i’m okay.. and i’m so happy but in so much pain ahaha”
-he smiled and kissed ur forehead, then ur nose nd finally ur lips.
-the nurse brings the now clean baby to u and gently places baby in ur arms
-”she looks so beautiful..” “she’s gnna grow up to be just like you y/n”
-jungwon was wrong. babygirl looks exactly like him but with longer hair hehe
-she even has his deep deep dimples, shes so cute when she smiles:((
-both of u cant even be mad that she looks like him(he realllyyy wanted a mini u when he gets a daughter)
-anyway now shes like 3? she loves calling her dadda for everythinggg
-she wants to play princess? dadda on his way
-she wants a piggyback ride for the 960427195 time? dadda is on his way
-she still counts on him always now that shes older, just now she calls him dad.
-dad always drops anything and everything for her.
-dads filming some content but his personal ringtone for his babygirl goes off. hes outta there
-she loves to dance too!!
-actually she watches jungwons dance from i-land(she hasnt watched the show yet but she seen a lot of the happier clips/edits)
-she tries to copy it a lot cuz she wants to be just like him dancing wise
-anyway shes a total daddys girl
(uncle) ni-ki <3
-alright we know ni-ki is… well you know how ni-ki is
-but he is the best babysitter ever!!
-he’ll come over without even getting asked to lol
-”hi guys i’m here to babysit!”
-”...but ni-ki we weren't even going out today..”
-”yeah well i got bored so get out of here so i can hang out with my minis”
-so they leave ni-ki with the children
- ni-ki is actually a really good babysitter, he knows how to have fun but also knows when things get too far
- “alright kiddos show me where your parents hide the candy. we get 2 pieces each after a healthy dinner”
-he knows his hyungs hide the candy high up cuz the kids cant reach it
-when things get out of hand, he will never ever raise his voice.
-he’ll give a big sigh and the kids just know to stop what theyre doing and to listen to him
-he wont ever use 'negative’ words i.e instead of “no fighting” he’ll say smthng like “lets all get along”
-then he sets up some music for them to dance to
-if they ask him, he’ll dance with them too
-they’ll even ask him to teach them and he happily will teach them
-hehe the kids will request to learn billy poco heheh
-ni-ki hates it but teaches it nonetheless
-once theyre all tired out (including ni-ki) they all sit on the couch and put on a movie
-they all fall asleep on ni-ki :)
-all the parents have pictures of ni-ki nd their kids sleeping
-actually all the kids come together and make like a slideshow of all the fun they’ve had with their favorite unlce for his birthday:)
tags; @criceofpain @celeste-hoon @jaylaxies @ajayke-reads
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pinkdaisies9285 · 3 months
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gold rush
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Jake Seresin x F!Reader (Callsign: Circe)
Warnings: Angst reader is in sad boi hours
Word Count: 1102
a love confession through music Masterlist
Author's Note: Welcome to my new Jake series. Each Chapter is going to be inspired by a song! The first song is gold rush by Taylor Swift!! I hope I can appease the Jake girlies. Also, thank you to all my beta readers who had to read my ROUGH draft.
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You watched his laughter light up the entire room from the corner. The type of laugh that made everyone turn their heads and see who it was. It made you envious of him and everyone else. Jealous of him drawing in so many admirers and jealous of everyone else being drawn into him. Yet, you couldn’t stop yourself from being drawn into Jake Seresin. The Navy pilot was beautiful and was the poster child of a ladies' man. Smart, funny, and easygoing, the list could go on.
You knew what you signed yourself up for when you joined Top Gun: difficult missions, high expectations, and hard senior officers. You weren’t signed up for falling in love with Jake “Hangman” Seresin. When you met Jake for the first time at the Hard Deck, you felt a rush of emotions. First was annoyance with his cocky attitude, next was the slight embarrassment when he asked about your callsign and you didn’t immediately reply, and finally was the feeling of knowing that a crush was starting to develop. 
“Hey, Circe, are you okay?” Bob’s question broke you out of your daydream. You didn’t even realize that you had gone so quiet for a while. 
“Yeah, I’m good. What’s up, Bob?”
“Oh, nothin’. Your face had a look of frustration so I was just worried,” The WSO had a concerned expression on his face. “Was it because of what happened today during the training exercises?”
The training exercises were hellish and frustrating for you. Maverick had decided to do dogfighting techniques and made you and Jake go against each other. While you were always up to practice dogfighting, you weren’t as successful against Jake. He was a distraction. Jake would toy with you over the comms the entire exercise. He said, “Come on, Circe, is that all you got?” Or “Not close enough, Cir. Try again.” 
Everything was said with a cocky tone and you could imagine the smirk on his face while he said these things. The teasing and missed shots resulted in you having to do at least 200 push-ups, and you could still feel the soreness in your arms from doing those push-ups. Either way, you were appreciative of Bob worrying about you and why you were going through what seemed like a spiral. “It's not that, Bob, but thank you again for looking out for me. I just have something on my mind but, hopefully, I’ll figure it out soon.”
“Is there anything I can do to help?” Bob seemed like he wanted to help you with whatever was going on in your head. Besides you had helped him with setting him up with his girlfriend. The least he could do was help you with your problems.
“Nah don’t worry about it.” you smiled his way and decided to get up and get a drink from the bar. Maybe Penny could help you with your woes, whether it be with a drink or conversation. Weaving yourself through the crowd to the bar, you leaned on the edge of the counter waiting to flag down Penny. 
“What’s up, Circe? Got something on your mind?” Penny asked while getting your regular order ready. “Man troubles?”
“How did you know?” you asked while looking slightly surprised that she instantly knew what was your problem. “Was it obvious?”  
“Your face is kinda an open book when you’re here,” she replied with a slight smile. “Also you’ve been staring at Jake for a good 40 minutes with a longing look.”
You were stunned by how easily Penny could figure out, not only what the problem was, but who was at the center of the problem. Were you that easy to read? Could Jake notice it too? Either way, you decided to confide in Penny with your dilemma. “Well, you got me there, Penny. If I’m being honest–”
“You like Jake. Regardless of his reputation.” Penny finished your sentence knowing exactly how you felt because she had felt it with Maverick when they first met in the 80s. “I’ve been in your shoes, Circe, and it’s hard to want a man who seems unattainable. Do you want to pursue these feelings or get rid of them?” 
That question made you think. Do you want to try for Jake, or do you want to get over him and move on? Whatever option you picked, you felt like you would suffer some type of consequence. Being with him would probably make you harbor feelings of jealousy about being with someone everyone wants. Not being with him would make you feel stupid and confirm your fears of not being worthy of him. “I’m not sure Pen. I feel like it's a Catch-22 situation for me.”
“Well, you better decide quickly because someone else is trying to snatch up your man.” Penny pointed over to the beautiful woman who had caught Jake’s attention. 
Jake had instantaneously started to flirt with her and it hurt to watch. Yet, this happened every time at the Hard Deck. You would sit and watch Jake pick up a drop-dead gorgeous woman and leave with her. It made you feel like you shouldn’t even try. Based on the type of women Jake goes for, you didn’t compare. It was one of the main reasons why you hadn’t tried to pursue him. The other one was that Jake seemed to treat you “like one of the guys.” It didn’t matter what you did, trying to wear a little bit of makeup or stepping up your casual outfits to the Hard Deck. He didn’t see you as anything but a coworker. 
You down the drink Penny had put in front of you and gave her your card. You couldn’t stand to watch this unfold for the thousandth time. After Penny closed your tab, she gave back your card with a sad smile on her face. “You calling it a night, Cir?”
“Yeah, I think I need to figure out what I’m going to do. Thanks for the advice, Penny.” you got up and said goodbye to the older woman. Weaving your way to the door, you took a deep breath after stepping out the door. 
Fishing your keys out while meandering over to your car, you thought someone said your name. Turning back you see no one, so you hop into your car. Sighing, you put the key into the ignition, and it sputtered to life. The sound of your phone connecting to the Bluetooth was instant. It started playing the next song on your playlist from the drive to work this morning. The first notes began.
“Gleaming, twinkling…….”
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Tag List: @nerdgirljen @just-in-case-iloveyou @tgmreader @jessicab1991 @gaysnowrose @mamaskillerqueen @waywardhunter95
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Divider Credit: @cafekitsune
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yournowheregirl · 1 year
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thank y’all for your patience for this part and as a treat it’s an extra long one and posted just in time for dolly’s birthday (today, the 19th) and my own (tomorrow, the 20th). see you around for part 6!
[part 1] [part 2] [part 3] [part 4] [part 6 + complete on ao3]
part 5: baby i’m burnin’ 
For a just a moment as he looks into Steve’s big hazel eyes, Eddie’s entire world stands still and just two questions echo through his mind.
One: what the hell is Steve doing here?
Two: how much of that song did Steve hear and will he be able to connect the dots?
Okay, technically he has three questions but he doesn’t have time to think about any of them because the longer he’ll stay here, the longer Steve will have time to decipher the puzzle that’s lying right in front of him, right there in Eddie’s eyes. Eddie obviously can’t have that, so he stands up, drops the guitar onto the floor, pushes past Steve and heads towards the exit. He hears Pat and Tish say something, some kind of protest but it doesn’t register in his brain as he slams the door shut behind him.
It’s still coming down in buckets once he steps outside, but it still better than staying inside, to be in the same room with Steve and those damn puppy eyes of his. He jogs to his van, patting his jeans pockets in search for his keys, only to come up empty. 
Fuck. The keys must still be in his leather jacket. Which he left upstairs. Inside the bar.
For a moment, Eddie contemplates just walking all the way back to Hawkins but the continuous rain pour stops him from doing yet another incredibly stupid thing. He kicks the side of the van - it already has enough dents so what’s one more? - and turns on his heel to go back inside.
Only to be once again greeted by Steve.
“Get lost, Harrington.” Eddie bites out before Steve can even get a word in. He pushes past Steve once again, not-so-accidentally bumping into him to really get the point across. 
“Eddie, wait!” Steve grabs him by the wrist, stopping him dead in his tracks. 
“Let. Me. Go.” Eddie’s eyes are flaming with anger as Steve nods slowly in response, fingers releasing their grip but lingering just a moment before they completely move away. 
“Eddie, please, just listen to me for one second.” Steve pleads. “I came here because you didn't show up at my place tonight and I was worried about you.”
“You were worried about me?” Eddie snaps. “You should’ve thought about that before you ditched me for some fucking date. Thanks for the heads up by the way, really appreciate it.”
Eddie’s already moving back towards the bar when Steve speaks up again, annoyance written all over his voice. “I ditched you? You were the one who didn’t show up at my house in the first place!”
Is this guy for real? Does he really not see the problem of having a friend over during a first date? Eddie feels his blood boil hotter by the second, and since Steve is probably staring at him with those big doe-eyes of his, like he did nothing wrong, something inside Eddie just snaps. He whips his head around, his wet hair flinging water droplets through the air. 
“Yeah, because you had a goddamn date coming over and so excuse me for not wanting to be a fuckin’ third-wheel with the guy I’m in love with!”
The silence that follows is deafening as Eddie slowly realizes what he just said. 
Oh fuck.
This was not how this was supposed to go. He had a plan, he had moves, he had this whole thing figured out before Dustin dropped the bomb about Steve’s date. Then the plan changed and Eddie made a vow to never say another word about his feelings for Steve to anyone. 
Until now, apparently.  
“You… you’re in love with me?” Steve asks, his voice almost a whisper over the sound of the pouring rain. 
There’s no use in lying at this point, Eddie’s pretty sure that his face is saying everything that Steve needs to know right now. He could deny it all he wants, but deep-down he know that Steve’ll see right through him. He always has. 
Eddie nods slowly, his anger making way for embarrassment and anxiety. He looks away, his racing heart prevents him from looking Steve in the eye. His shoulder sag as he somehow finds the courage to talk again. 
“Just… just go. Go be with your date or whatever. I’ll.. I’ll just back off. We don’t need to see each other if you don’t want to and- and I totally understand if you don’t wanna be friends anymore. I mean I get it, totally get it and-”
But before Eddie can finish his sentence, Steve interrupts him, suddenly standing much closer than before. “I’m not going anywhere.”
Eddie narrows his eyes at him. “Why not?”
“Oh my God.” Steve almost whines. “Because you were my date, Eddie!”
Wait, what? That can’t be right.
“I… no. No, we weren’t going on a date, we were having a movie night.” Eddie stammers. “A movie night that you forgot about and- and- no, this wasn’t a date.”
“Tell that to the freshly made pasta and wine I had to put in the fridge because you didn’t show up.” Steve scoffs. He runs a hand through his wet hair, then over his face, shaking off the remainder of water. “Or the dozen roses I bought to put on the table because this-” He gestures between them “-was supposed to be a date.”
The roses. Those goddamn roses that Dustin told him about, they were for him? Eddie’s mind is reeling with all this new information, unable to form a coherent thought. 
“Wait, did you forget that we were going on a date?” Steve asks. He ducks his head in an attempt to force Eddie to look at him. When Eddie finally does, he’s taken aback by how soft Steve’s eyes are, how surprisingly amused he looks by all of this.
Eddie thinks back to earlier that week, when he was loitering around Family Video after his shift at the garage. He and Steve had been talking like any other day, though Eddie had been particularly flirty in that moment, teasing Steve till his face was beet-red and followed by a bright smile and a quiet ‘shut up, Eddie’. 
Customers had come in then, demanding Steve’s attention. But right before he attended to them, Steve had turned around, almost looking shy.
“What are you doing on Friday?”
Eddie shrugged. “Other than contemplating my existence and overthinking all of my sins? Not much.”
“Good.” Steve had laughed. “You wanna come to my place for dinner and a movie? I’ll be making my Nana’s pasta primavera.”
“Ooh, you know how the way to my heart, Steve.” Eddie said, dramatically lying a hand over his heart. “As long as you provide the food, I’ll be there.”
Steve had beamed at him right then and there, like Eddie had personally handed him a ten-thousand dollar check. “Great! It’s a da-” 
The sound of a customer repeatedly dinging the bell on the counter had interrupted the rest of his sentence and Eddie hadn’t thought much of it at the time. But now… now he knows exactly what Steve was going to say. 
It’s a date.
Silence hangs heavy in the air. The downpour muffles the ringing in Eddie’s ears as he tries to wrap his head around all of this. 
Steve wanted tonight to be a date.
Steve wanted to go on a date with him.
Steve likes him. 
What the actual fuck.
“Hey, hey, it’s okay.” Steve mutters. He grabs Eddie’s hands, thumbs softly running across his knuckles and it’s only then that Eddie realizes that his hands have been trembling all this time. “You wanna go back inside? The rain-”
“You… you like me.” Eddie chokes out.
“Yeah, thought that was kinda obvious at this point.” Steve laughs. “But apparently, it wasn’t so I’m sorry, I should’ve-”
Eddie shakes his head, squeezes Steve’s hands a little tighter. “No, no way. If anyone should apologize it’s me. I should’ve just called you when Dustin told me about your date and I should’ve noticed that you were asking me out and I-”
“Eddie…” Steve says softly. 
One of his hands lets go of Eddie’s, only for it to move up to his face. His thumb softly brushes away the droplets of rainwater on his cheek, on his jaw, on his lips. There’s an unspoken question in Steve’s eyes, asking for permission as they wander down to Eddie’s lips, then back up again. 
A simple nod from Eddie is enough to answer that silent question.
Steve’s hand comes to join the other on Eddie’s jaw, cradling his face so gently, like he’s holding a precious gemstone. The way he pulls Eddie towards him, however, is anything but gentle and Eddie almost trips over his own feet, grabbing onto Steve’s waist for balance. And despite the coolness of the rain water, Steve feels warm underneath the soaked pink fabric of his button-down.
There’s a second where Eddie thinks he sees Steve hesitating - his breathing heavy, eyes once again asking for permission, as if Eddie’s ever going to back away now. Eddie fights the urge to roll his eyes and leans in, pressing his lips against Steve’s.
As far as first kisses go, Eddie has had a few. Always rough, always rushed, always dirty. Never with anyone that mattered, never with anyone that cared, never like this.
Because this isn’t anything like those other first kisses, because Steve’s kisses are soft, gentle even. It’s like he’s saying sorry over and over again against Eddie’s lips and it’s this soft gesture that somehow manages to set Eddie’s entire body on fire, burning from the inside out in the best way possible. 
The rain water makes it easier for their lips to glide against one another and it instantly makes Eddie crave more. His grip on Steve’s waist tightens, making Steve gasp in response and Eddie makes good use of that split second to lick his way into Steve’s mouth. 
Steve tastes like rainwater and mint and Eddie fights back a smile - he must’ve taken a breath mint before coming here, a boy scout always comes prepared after all. The taste of it, of Steve, is frankly addicting and Eddie kisses back harder, but still as slow as before, reveling at the soft sounds Steve’s making at the back of his throat. 
They have to pull away for air at some point and Eddie groans in annoyance. He needs to make up for lost time and this wasn’t nearly enough, oxygen be damned.
“As romantic as this is-” Steve laughs when Eddie places kisses all over his face - his cheeks, his forehead, the tip of his nose. “-can we please go back inside? This rain is ruining my jeans.”
“Oh, well, we wouldn’t want that, now would we?” Eddie grins and with a final kiss to Steve’s lips, he pulls away to go back inside and escape the rain.
-xxx-
Pat and Tish are a bit weary when Eddie walks back inside the bar with Steve in tow and even Steve’s usual charming smile doesn’t seem to deter them from glaring daggers at him. 
Eddie’s heart melts a bit at their protectiveness, but he assures them that they talked things out, that things are good now. Pat nods approvingly and invites Steve to come talk to her later and even though her glare has faded, Eddie is still a little scared of her on Steve’s behalf. Tish, on the other hand, immediately squeals with joy and tries to pull both of them in a hug, only backing away when she realizes that they’re soaking wet.
“We need to get you boys some dry clothes.” Tish says.
“No, no, we’ll be on our way.” Steve shakes his head. “Don’t wanna be any trouble.”
“Nonsense. You’re one of us now.” Tish lovingly pats his cheek. “C’mon, we got plenty of clothes in the lost and found and if that fails, we always got Pat’s closet to dig around in.”
Steve looks so very confused and Eddie just laughs, head thrown back as they follow Tish back upstairs. She hands them a cardboard box filled with various clothing items that had been left in the bar over the years and directs them to Pat’s part of the closet.
“I’ll leave you guys to it.” Tish says, walking back to the hallway. She turns around in the doorway, a knowing smile on her lips. “Oh and by the way, these walls are pretty thin, so don’t get any ideas.”
“Okay, bye Tish!” Eddie says quickly, face turning pink at the implication of her words.  He clears his throat and turns to Steve. “Sorry about her.”
“Nah, it’s alright. She’s got nothing to worry about.”
“Wow, we’re, what- ten minutes into this whole relationship crap and you’re already saying you don’t want to jump my bones?” Eddie asks, mock-offended. “Not off to a great start there, Steve.”
“Oh, I’m not saying that.” Steve cocks his head to the side, smirking. “Just saying that I’m not that easy.”
Eddie scoffs. “What? You need winin’ and dinin’ to get in the mood?”
“Certainly helps.” Steve shrugs. There’s a twinkle in his eyes that Eddie can’t quite explain. That is until he remembers what Steve had told him earlier - about the wine and the roses and the dinner in the fridge - and he suddenly feels his face heat up again. There’s a lot you can say about Steve, but he’s definitely a man with a plan. 
“Anyway…” Eddie clears his throat. “Let’s find some clothes yeah?” 
Lucky for them, the clothes in the lost and found box actually fit them pretty well. Sure the jeans are a bit baggier than both of their usual styles, but at least they don’t need a belt to keep it from falling off. But much to Eddie’s dismay, Steve has to take off his button-down since it’s completely drenched
That moment of dismay is short-lived because now Eddie is faced with Steve’s bare chest on full display. He’d seen it before, way back when at Lover’s Lake but he didn’t allow himself to spare Steve a second glance. Didn’t allow himself to look, but oh boy is he looking now. Even with all the scars swirling around his skin, he’s still one the most beautiful men Eddie has ever laid eyes upon. Plus, there is that chest hair that had been torturing him since the moment he spotted it peaking out of that same pink button-down.
Steve catches him staring, right when he’s about to pull on some bland white t-shirt over his head. He stops, lowers his arms and smirks at Eddie. “You do know you’re staring, right?”
“I know.” Eddie nods, smiling. “Think I’m allowed to at this point, don’t you?”
He watches as Steve lets the shirt drop to the floor and his heart speeds up when he notices that Steve is staring right back at him, dark eyes roaming up and down his body. But it’s the look that does it, that look of hunger and desire in Steve’s eyes, that sets Eddie’s insides aflame.
It’s as if Steve can read his mind, because soon as Eddie takes a step forward, Steve does as well, meeting him halfway. There’s a moment where they both just look at each other, waiting who’s going to cave in first. In the end, Eddie isn’t really sure who was the first to lean in, all he knows is that this kiss is vastly different than their first.
No longer soft and tender, the kiss is feverish and frantic with hands roaming over damp, bare skin, pulling each other flush against each other. Their first kiss made Eddie’s brain go all soft and gooey, but this kiss... This kiss makes it go static. Hyper aware of every single one of Steve’s movements, every swipe of his tongue, every bite of his teeth, every nail that digs into his skin.
Steve seems to have a similar reaction, judging by the way he’s desperately moaning when Eddie’s hands find their way into his hair and pull his head to the side for better access to his mouth.
“Be quiet.” Eddie pants against Steve’s lips. “Thin walls, remember?
Steve whines, face scrunched up in annoyance and pulls away. “Fine.”
“Aww Stevie, what’s wrong?” Eddie teases, nails scratching against Steve’s scalp. “You seem a little worked up but… didn’t you say you ain’t that easy?”
Steve’s eyes darken, his breathing heavy as he takes a step back and runs a hand through his hair. It’s literally unfair how hot he looks when doing that and Eddie just wants to pull him right back for more. 
“You… you must know what you’re doing to me with that damn accent of yours.” Steve croaks. He looks flustered, even though he definitely had his tongue halfway down Eddie’s throat just moments ago and it makes the flurry of butterflies inside Eddie’s stomach grow ten sizes.
“Darlin’, I don’t know what you mean.” Eddie winks.
He hears Steve cursing under his breath as Eddie turns around to dig through the lost and found box again. All of the shirts are objectively terrible or don’t fit him at all and even though he knows he’ll just need to pick something dry to wear, he still wants to look good. He has a reputation to uphold after all.
And it’s like the universe is smiling down at him because at the very bottom of the box, Eddie finds a black button-down. A Western cut shirt, in fact, complete with contrasting red piping and embroidered roses underneath the collar. 
Oh, Steve’s gonna love this.
He’s rolling up the sleeves as he turns around, only to find that Steve’s too busy looking in the mirror and messing with hair to notice him. Eddie clears his throat and Steve finally tears his eyes away from his reflection 
“Well, fuck.” Steve groans once he notices what Eddie’s wearing, unable to keep his eyes off Eddie for another second. 
“I believe that now it’s you who’s staring, darlin’.” Eddie smirks
“Oh, I think I’m allowed, don’t you?” Steve says, parroting Eddie’s words back to him. He closes the distance between them again, pulling Eddie by his belt loops. “We better go back downstairs.”
“Why’s that?”
“Because I’m not sure how much these walls can drown out if we stay here much longer.”
-xxx-
The bar is open once they get downstairs and Tish immediately pulls them aside and puts two plates of spicy fried chicken and cornbread in front of them.
“On the house.” Tish smiles. “It’s your first date after all.”
Right, tonight was supposed to be their first date. Eddie had almost forgot about it with all the hassle that happened earlier. But it’s clear that Steve hasn’t because he picks up their plates and redirects them to a booth in the far corner of the bar. He’s a real gentleman too, offering to let Eddie slide into the booth first, only to squeeze against him as soon as he sits down. 
Eddie realizes then and there that he’s never been on a date before. 
Not a real one at least, and despite his usual skepticism, it’s actually pretty nice. Now that most of the awkwardness is out of the way, the conversation flows easily, the flirting too, actually. Mostly because Steve continues to be enamored by every vaguely Southern-sounding thing that rolls off Eddie’s tongue while Eddie only pretends to be annoyed by Steve’s cheesy pick-up lines, even though he secretly loves them.
It’s…
It’s easy.
Just like Steve said all those weeks ago, when he broke up with Emily. And then again after he saw Eddie perform right there on that stage. Eddie hadn’t really believed him back then, but now… now, he’s might just start to believe it.
Believe that loving Steve is the easiest thing he’s ever done.
Eddie’s leaning against the wall, with Steve nestled in between his legs when he hears it. A familiar beat, followed by some piano and brass instruments. He immediately pushes Steve out of the booth, scrambles to the feet and pulls Steve towards the dance floor.
“Wha- what is happening?” Steve stammers.
“You look at me that way. I know what your eyes say, your eyes reflect love and desire.” Eddie sings along, a bright smile plastered onto his face. “I see that you need me, I need you to please me. You touch me and set me on fire.”
He pulls Steve closer to him, swaying his hips along to the music. It takes a second for Steve to get the memo but then he’s slinging his arms around Eddie’s shoulders and beaming right back at him.
“I cannot resist you, each time I kiss you, then everything goes up in flames.”
Now Eddie’s not much of a dancer but he can move his hips alright and the sweet sounds of this particular Dolly Parton song will get him moving any day of the week. And the same goes for Steve so it seems, as the smile on his face doesn’t fade once. 
In fact, only grows larger and larger when Eddie grabs his hand and spins him around, his head thrown back with joyous laughter when he falls back into Eddie’s arms.
“Baby, I’m burnin’, out of control. Baby I’m burnin’, body and soul. Hot as a pistol that’s flaming desire, baby, I’m burning you got me on fire.” 
Steve suddenly changes course, one hand snaking around Eddie’s waist, while the other is holding Eddie’s hand tightly. Before Eddie knows what’s happening, Steve dips him, actually dips him like some professionally trained dancer, to the beat of the song.
“Where’d you learn that?” Eddie pants as Steve is still holding him in place.
“What, you thought you were the only one with a secret past?” Steve asks smugly
Eddie doesn’t even get a chance to answer the question because Steve’s lips are back on him in a split second. Not that Eddie minds of course. He could stay like this for hours, safely wrapped in Steve’s arms, feeling warm all over as their lips move in sync against each other.
“Baby I’m burnin’, you got me on fire…”
Eddie’s outfit is inspired by this amazing fanart by themdelakrem!
tag list: @cheatghost @henderdads @unclewaynemunson @goblin-eddie @trikigirl271 @alienace @legitcookie @gothbat99 @fandomcartographer @stevethehairington @blank1eboi @this-earlobe-is-naked @fruitandbubbles @courtjestermunson @steveisabicon @stereoteleversion @wrenisflying @spectrum-spectre @hotluncheddie @punkharringtxn @remislupinsthevoiceofgod @panicatthediaz @thegingervulcan @sharkruption @goodolefashionedloverboi @thelastwalkingsoul @undreamingscatworld @starrystevie @magipemuseum @mightbeasleep @corrodedcoughin @linkydinky06 @hardboiledeggs @gamerdano @limpingpenguin @blackpanzy @piningapple @teelagurl558 @theokatz @moonlightmirrorball @milf-harrington @raisedbylibrarians @eddiemunsonswife @catateme9 @stranger-poets-society @munsonsduchess @fandemonium-takes-its-toll @uwujinniee @bejeweledbaby @hardboiledleggs @hamiltonsteele @edgelordesworld @quickenedheartbeat @episcogoth @purplepluviophile @bornonthesavage @ninjapirateunicorns @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @medolie71 @knitsforthetrail @dilutedpondwater @he-she-steveharrington @plasticcrotches @smallspaceplant @mandalynn @m-owo-n @ceaselessly-watching @aralana765 @idontgetpaidenoughforthisshit @occasionalartthings @lucasrightarm @punctualhowell @sultrypickle @spicemallow @platinum-sunset @batxsignalsx @lovelyscot @sillysparrow @freyaforestafay @im-justatrashcan @airiervessel
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milgram-tournament · 5 months
Text
MILGRAM Best Song Tournament, Round 1, Match 2 BRING IT ON vs. AFTER PAIN
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Propaganda for both options under the cut!
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Propaganda for BRING IT ON:
"Reasons why Bring it On should win:
- Just by starting the song, the instrumentals are BANGER. Like his more rock style is very cool, even better than After Pain’s more mellow style - Arthur’s voice (Futa’s va) had bills due because have you HEARD his singing?? His raspier voice fits Futa so well - It feels so explosive and like a call to action in a sense, which very much matches Futa’s mentality during trial 1. He also wasn’t playing victim like a CERTAIN girl… (jk, love you mu!) - SAA HAJIMEYOU USOTSUKI KARIDA - UNDEAD HEROOOI YES SLAY KING HIS HIGH NOTE HERE IS HEAVENLY - His scream at the end. Oh my god. HE LITERALLY ATE THIS NOTE. AFTER PAIN COULD NEVER. BRING IT ON FTW 🔥🔥🔥" - His range goes WAAAAAY higher than Mu. She would end up like PHG if she even tried hitting any of his high notes in the last chorus /j
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- The vocals are amazing, those growls are so well done - You’re able to get Fuuta’s crime and motive pretty succinctly, only based on the visuals - But it still leaves a lot up to interpretation, like how he only attacked once in the final fight scene. It lead to some cool theories. - On that note, the game aspects are so cool!! Especially when paired with him going after people online, just good synergy with awesome style! - Fuuta’s scared face after he realizes what he did. The great contrast of other foes simply being knocked out then being met with blood splatter. - The tempo of the song changing with his mood is a really good touch as well. Make the song more chaotic which highlights his character traits well
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"propaganda for bring it on: the music FUCKS it genuinely slaps so hard listening to it. song style is incredible its perfect for fuutas personality and gamer vibes. also the way the mv frames everything as a game? the only time real blood and real gore happens being when killcheroy dies? the little details of all the usernames, the different monster designs, the generally distorted feel of everything being too lighthearted?
okay i could go on about the mv for hours but lets not. aside from that: the FEEL of the song!!! the vocals!!!! it really feels like fuuta putting his whole heart into it, into this point of view that both blows problems out of proportion and minimises them, and DEEPLY fucking up. my darling little hypocrite gamer boy twitter user. he makes his witch hunt genuinely sound like something that could sweep people up into it. also the instruments goddddd. the guitar and synth the bass and the drums the DRUMS. im relistening to it to write this propaganda and it keeps making me headbang when i should be writing. if you arent headbanging to bring it on you are LYING.
the way the lyrics are written is wonderful too!!!! they feel so brash and brave and powerful and like. cocky about it. and it fits PERFECTLY. its gets someone swept up into it and it FUCKS. vote bring it on im serious. lets go!! a victory march!! dan da dan!!"
Propaganda for AFTER PAIN:
"so here is why people should vote for AFTER PAIN !!"
Muu's vocals. Need I say more?
The bridge to it is absolutely wonderfully done, the way she softens her vocals to an almost creepy point is incredible
during the final chorus you can hear the desperation in her voice and it’s very well portrayed
The coloring in this music video were phenomenal
The overlapping vocals at the end of the song just have a really really nice effect
Its just a pure banger
In some parts of the song there’s the sound of a clock ticking in the background used as a sort of beatline… GENIUS??
Its just a banger
even with what we found out about Muu in her second trial, After Pain on its own portrayed bullying in a very realisitc and artistic way (from someone who deals with it regularly)
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"After pain propoganda: She just girlbossed too close to the sun and happened to be holding a knife at the time"
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"Gosh everything about After Pain... How can you NOT like it? It's literally such a good song and is very singable. The instrumentation is absolutely amazing and I've listened to it on loop so much."
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sunny-fox · 8 months
Text
I've been wanting to write this for a while now -
God! Reader who stims + Headcanons
Idea by: @karmawonders (please check out their blog too!!)
Fandom: Genshin Impact
Reader's pronouns: -
Notes: implied neurodivergent reader & characters, self-indulgent, includes personal headcanons
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Candace sat on your bed, legs dangling over the edge. She had turned to her left to face you - you lay on your side, huddled underneath your blanket and cuddling a pillow. The two of you chatted idly, till you blinked sleepily and yawned, rubbing at your eye.
"Are you going to sleep now, Your Grace?" Candace asked softly.
You nodded, grabbing your blanket and pulling it up to your nose. You breathed in deeply, rubbing the fabric between your fingers as you did so.
You noticed Candace looking at you curiously. "Don't mind me...I'm just stimming," you mumbled, rubbing the blanket against your nose.
The look on Candace's face turned into one of realisation. She nodded in response and ran her fingers through your hair gently. "Sweet dreams, Your Grace," she whispered.
You hummed quietly and continued to breathe in the scent of your blanket.
Candace left your room after giving you one last pat on the head.
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You were walking in the streets of Fontaine, with Navia keeping you company. Glancing at the various shops and wares available, you hummed any song that you could think of every time your eyes settled on something new that reminded you of them.
A few minutes later, you looked to your side and saw Navia staring at you with a soft gaze and a smile (she probably had been doing so for at least ten minutes). You froze momentarily, and your humming halted as well.
"Is everything alright, Your Grace?" Navia asked.
"Everything's okay, but why were you staring at me?" You asked. "If it's because of my humming, then... I'm sorry. I'll stop."
"That's because I love to hear you hum!" Navia replied. "It's okay, you can continue humming. It's not annoying at all. It's really nice."
You grinned at Navia gratefully before continuing to hum. You noticed that Navia bobbed her head occasionally or matched the clicks of her boots as she walked according to your hums.
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You were hanging out with Heizou for today, and the both of you decided to have lunch at Uyuu Restaurant.
While he was waiting for the food to be served, Heizou heard some soft clicks. He looked at you and saw you resting your hands against the edge of the table. You were picking at your fingernails and the skin of your fingers.
"Your Grace." Heizou's voice caught your attention. You looked up and saw him staring into your eyes. "Please stop doing that."
"Oh - I'm sorry!" You quickly put your hands on your knees, gripping them so that you wouldn't pick at your fingers. "Those clicks sound annoying; I know. I'm really sorry."
"No, that's not the problem," Heizou said, leaning forward slightly. "The problem is, it's bad for you. I understand that you're just stimming, but that's an unhealthy stim." He stood from his original seat and moved around the table to sit next to you, reaching out with one hand, palm facing upward. "May I please have a look at your hand?"
Reluctantly, you placed your hand in his, showing him your uneven nails. Heizou sighed and rubbed his thumb against them.
"There's nothing wrong with stimming, Your Grace, but please don't hurt yourself while you stim," he said. "Here, you can play with this." He undid the black pom-pom attached to his clothing and pressed it onto your palm.
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Headcanons:
Kaeya whistles to stim. Please teach him all of the songs you know; in return, he'll teach you all of the Teyvat songs he knows. He wants to whistle along with your songs while you hum.
Klee has a comfort blanket that she cuddles to sleep every night. She's so happy to know that you have the same way of stimming as her! She's heard a lot of adults saying things like "kids should outgrow their habit of having comfort blankets when they grow up", so please assure her that it's not true.
Shenhe rubs her sleeves when she's stressed or nervous. You'll see her doing so when she's in a crowd, or before she wants to talk to you. Just like Klee, she needs assurance that stimming isn't bad, as some people still give her weird looks when she does so.
Beidou whistles to stim as well. Unlike Kaeya, she doesn't whistle when you hum. She likes to imitate the calls of all kinds of birds. Sometimes a bird or two will swoop down from the air to land on her shoulder or hand after hearing her whistles.
Yuegui is Yaoyao's stim toy. She always holds it in her arms so that she can give it a squeeze now and then, or breathe in the smell of osmanthus flowers on it. Yuegui makes her feel safe - it was originally made by Cloud Retainer to protect her, after all.
Sara likes to run her fingers through her feathers. She just materialises her wings and brushes them with her hand, albeit only when there's very few people around. When she's in public, she chews on the inside of her mouth.
Kirara waves her tails back and forth. Some people tell her to stop because they keep seeing something (her tails) swishing in their peripheral vision when she stims - they say that it's annoying. Please tell them off, pat Kirara on the head and tell her that it's okay to stim.
Collei fiddles with the tassels of her shawl while patrolling or learning new words. When she's at home, where she doesn't have to be cautious all the time, Cuilen-Anbar is her comfort "blanket". (Inspired by that one cutscene where Collei cuddles Cuilen-Anbar while sleeping)
Wanderer may not admit it, but he stims too! He used to fiddle with his vision only when he's 100% sure there's no one around. Similar to Sara, his stimming behaviour was very subtle in public - he rubbed his fingers against his sleeves whenever he crossed his arms over his chest. He's actually quite relieved when you tell him that stimming in front of others is totally fine.
Lynette stims by playing with her ponytail. She does it every time before a performance. Sometimes she twists her ponytail, sometimes she runs her fingers through it, sometimes she curls a strand of it around her finger. Occasionally, Lyney has to help her undo the knots in her hair 5 minutes before he has to go on stage.
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I love my stim toys hehe
It's okay for anyone to stim as long as you don't hurt anyone, including yourself!
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szaismyqueen · 9 months
Text
All Mine (Chapter One)
olivia rodrigo x gp!reader
slow updates.
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You believe Olivia Rodrigo could pass as the most oblivious person in the world. Everyone else around her, and you, could see how much you treasured her.
They saw how you'd stare so much you'd forget to blink, they'd hear the "I love you's" under your breath.
They noticed it all, the look in your eyes explained it. How deeply in love you were falling with your best friend. You'd never openly admit to it, sure, but you didn't need to. Olivia was easy to love, she was so gentle, so compassionate. It was hard to not fall in love with her.
Quite since you guys were constantly at each other hips, you practically knew her like the back of your palm. You knew her favorite album, her favorite color, her favorite song, and her favorite shirt to wear. God, you knew her better than she knows herself.
The moment you realized you loved her was scary. The two of you were walking down the late-night streets of Los Angles in desperate need of food. Thankfully there was a 24/7 burger joint that you both rushed to, laughing along the way.
It was odd, Olivia hadn't done anything out of the blue. She just sat there, smiling at you as you smiled back. But, that's when your eyes started exploring, taking in every detail of her face, how could you not see this before, she was so goddamn beautiful. She looked amazing naturally, with no makeup, nothing. It was just her, and you loved that. You loved her dark brown eyes, you loved her pink plum lips, you loved her.
Once you noticed, your heart stopped. You felt like the room was shrinking and of course, Olivia took notice of this. Taking your hand, those eyes that you loved staring into yours, showing some much care in them. "Hey, you okay?"
Her thumb rubbed the back of your hand, reassuringly. Never has Olivia's touch left such a mark on you, your body immensely got goosebumps, and you felt as if your heart was going to explode.
You clear your throat, trying to take your mind off the fact that you're deeply in love with your best friend and you only noticed now. "Yeah, sorry! I'm just hungry." You lie. "Oh,"
You can almost visibly see her relax, "I'll go check on the food, be right back." You nod, sending her a smile before she leaves out of sight. You sigh, your hands running down your face, you were so screwed.
After that night you slowly started to pull away from the brunette, you were scared, and that was totally reasonable. You were scared of losing your best friend because you couldn't keep your feeling in check. You stopped coming over, you stopped calling her every day, then eventually you stopped texting. Completely going ghost. Was it a shitty thing to do, yes, were you thinking about that at the time, no?
Olivia didn't know what she had done, she was losing sleep over it. Rethinking about all the stuff she's said or could've done, what did she do to make you ignore her?
Days passed, weeks passed, and then months passed. You and Olivia hadn't spoken a word to each other for exactly six months, ten days, and fourteen hours. To be fair Olivia tried to get in contact with you, but your best friends stayed loyal to you, telling them they couldn't do anything. After a while, she gave up and let you move on.
You left Olivia because you thought your feelings would fade away, but they didn't. They only strengthened and all you wanted was to have her back in your arms. Eventually, it became a problem. You stopped going on, you stopped working on music, you locked yourself in your room only going out to get food. Your friends were worried about you, they tried getting you to explain what happened between the two of you but you never did.
Until Kai practically beat it out of you. "I swear to god Y/NN! Open this door." Kai shouted outside of your bedroom door, repeatedly banging on it. You take the pillow under you, placing it on top of your face. "You know what! Fine!"
Taking that as a sign she's leaving, you relax, turning onto your stomach and pulling your blanket above your head. Your heart nearly leaves your body when you feel cool air hitting your body as the blanket was fiercely pulled off of you.
"You fucking idiot! You forgot I'm from New York." She laughs holding up her credit card, your eyebrows furrow as you sit up in your bed in shock, she in fact did open the door with her credit card.
"Anyways," She takes a deep breath calming herself down. "Get up now. Go take a shower, shave.. please, and put on some fresh clothes."
"Kai-"
"Now, Y/N." You throw your head back, but get up heading towards the shower. After taking a shower, shaving, and putting on some fresh clothes you walked back out to a clean apartment. Confused you walked into the living room, seeing your three best friends. Normally you weren't an emotional person but seeing how they went out of their way to get you back on your feet brought tears to your eyes, Cameron smiled immediately bringing you into a hug, Elliot and Kai joining in.
It's been two months and four days after that day, mentally you were in a better headspace. You haven't thought of Olivia ever since you heard one of her songs playing on the radio, but other than that you didn't.
All that was on your mind was music, your friends, your family, and Skylar. The two of you met through Kai, she was having a small get-together and she decided to invite Skylar. There were only about ten people in the average-sized apartment your best friend owned, the music was really low, and all you could hear were the distant chatter in the living room.
You had left the room to get snacks for everyone, not knowing Skylar got up right behind you, you dropped the container of popcorn on the ground once you turned around, seeing the older woman. "Shit!"
"I'm so sorry, that’s my-" You interrupt, waving her off. "No, you're all good. I'm just too much of a pussy." Skylar laughs, crouching as well to clean up the spilled popcorn. You lift your head, and she does the same, staring into each other eyes. "I'm Y/N by the way... if you didn't know."
"Skylar. It's nice to meet you, Y/N." You smile at her, and she reciprocates, looking back down to hide her blush and finishing cleaning up the mess you made.
It felt nice to start dating again, Skylar was a good girlfriend. She kept you in check, and you were very grateful for her. And you wanted the whole world to know that. A few weeks after you and Skylar made it official you announced it to social media. The comments were mixed, they called her pretty and then the others called her a look-alike of Olivia. Those kinds of comments annoyed you and whenever you'd see one, you'd delete it right away.
You both made your first appearance as a couple on the VMAs red carpet, in the moment it felt amazing. Then, later on, you started to get into your head. You were competing with Olivia and a few other amazing artists for Song of the Year.
Justin Bieber and The Kid Laori performed their song, and then there she was.
You didn't know if it was the lights, the crowd, the atmosphere, or just her. Your heart felt like it was pounding out of your chest, hands were sweaty as if it was over 100 degrees in the room. And that horrible feeling in your stomach, gosh, you needed to go home.
But you couldn't.
You couldn't just walk out of the VMAs, and you didn't really want to. Confusing, right? That's what your brain was at this moment, confused. You were happy to see her, of course, you were. Why wouldn't you be? Would it be horrible to admit you missed her? That you missed her laugh? That you missed her singing? That you just craved her at this point?
You didn't know where this feeling was coming from. You moved on, right? But, why does it feel like you're experiencing that night all over again?
You're knocked out of your thoughts by your girlfriend, "Hey, you okay?" The crowd is loud, so she leans into your ear. You place a hand on her shoulder, reassuringly before nodding your head. She gives you a small smile before turning back towards the stage, you do the same.
The loud instruments play, blasting in your ear before they stop. A familiar tune plays and again they're heard, along with a familiar voice. One that you missed so dearly. You look over to your girlfriend who is surprisingly enjoying the performance, singing along perfectly.
You never knew she was such a big fan, it was shocking actually. Skylar would never play her music around you but you have seen a couple of Olivia's songs on her playlist.
You watch the rest of the performance, your eyes never leaving Olivia. As time passed it felt as if it was just you there, no crowd, no backup dancer, no one. Just you and Olivia. Of course, good 4 u wasn't about you, but tonight it felt like it was. The public only knew half of the story about you and Olivia, they knew that you two weren't exactly friends anymore, but they didn't know the reason why.
To be fair, Olivia didn't even know the reason why, only you did.
There had been a few articles saying "Sour" was about you, but it was not. At least, when you two were friends she began writing the album about her ex-boyfriend Joshua Bassett.
Once her performance ends the crowd stands up, clapping, and you join in with a small smile playing on your face. Yeah, you were happy for her. She deserves this, to be in front of a crowd, doing what she loves.
Doja Cat comes onto the stage to introduce Jennifer Lopez, who announces the winner for Song of the Year, Skylar grabs your hand as the screen shows all of the nominees. "And the VMA goes to..." You feel Skylar's grip on your hand tighten and your heart beating even more than it was before. Jennifer opens the card and quickly glances at you with a smile.
"Y/N MYERS!!"
Hearing the arena fill with your song you stand up, smiling. Skylar jumps up bringing you into a tight hug, you two lean side to side before you pull away, placing a kiss on her lips. You never thought you'd win an award tonight. You just wanted to scream out all the excitement and happiness you were holding in for the cameras.
You make your way to Jennifer, waving to your fans on your way. Jennifer hugs you rubbing your back with a "congratulations", you thank her before picking up the award, looking at it for a few seconds before facing the crowd.
"I can't believe I won this award. There are so many people to thank. I first want to acknowledge my fellow nominees." You glance around the room, " I respect you all so much. I want to thank Kali for joining me in the process of making Get You, um.." You look down at the award before looking back up.
"I want to thank my wonderful friends and girlfriend, Skylar. What can I say, guys? You all loved me and stood by me when I was at my lowest, this award is also for us. But most importantly thank you guys, my amazing fans. You all inspire me so much, this isn't just my award, it's ours!" You lift it in the air, smiling as the crowd cheers. Giving one last wave you leave the stage.
The rest of the VMAs was... interesting. And you're absolutely sure the camera caught you with your mouth agape a couple of times at some of the performances. Actually, you and Skylar. The show ended at around eleven, and you were going to attend the afterparty with Kai since Skylar was heading straight home, tired from the long night. You were going to head home with her but she reassured you that it was fine and you should go enjoy yourself.
Now here you were, staring ahead in your thoughts as you held an empty cup that was previously filled with lemonade in your hand.
"What's on your mind, Y/NN?" You blink a few times, turning your head to Kai. "Kai- I... do you think it's weird that I miss her?" Kai slowly lowers her own cup from her lips, slightly tilting her head. "No. Not at all. I do think that you're an idiot and you need to talk to her tonight."
You snort, "Talking to me is the last thing Olivia wants to do." Kai sighs, leaning back into the leather couch. "Why did you guys stop talking?"
"I...I love her. I loved her, yeah." Your stomach had intense butterflies, it felt so fucking amazing to say it out loud. You waited for a reaction from Kai, but she just sat there, waiting on you?
"Wait...that was it? Be so fucking for real, Y/N." What! You furrow your eyebrows shaking your head in confusion. "Wha?"
"Anyone could see that you loved Olivia, I honestly thought you two were secretly dating and she cheated or something. But you seriously stopped talking to her because you were the last fucking one to find out you love her! You're so stupid."
"Um.." You press your lips together, before laughing. Gosh, you were stupid! Now that you think about it, the feeling of being in love with Olivia is so... compelling. "I'm going to get some more lemonade." You tell Kai, getting up immediately. She hums, taking a sip of her drink.
Olivia Rodrigo, Olivia, Liv! She was flooding your mind. You needed a distraction, and the perfect thing was some lemonade, of course. You had to get Olivia out of your head and how in love you are with her, you mean loved. Oh, who are you kidding? You are off your face in love with that girl.
You spot the drink table, quickly trying to make your way toward it. Thinking the path is clear you walk even faster, until you bump into someone, almost knocking them down. As a reflex you grab their waist, holding them tight so they don't fall.
But that's when you notice, how ordinary this feeling is. And that's when you look and see her.
"Olivia," You gasp out.
361 notes · View notes
sc0tters · 9 months
Text
A Different Ending | Ethan Edwards
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summary: when Ethan learns about your intentions of transferring to a different college, the conversation takes a turn for the worst.
song: The Story Of Us - Taylor Swift
request: yes/no
warnings: mentions of underaged drinking at a college party.
word count: 1.25k
authors note: used a bit of a personal note with the student athlete part but I never mentioned a sport in an attempt to keep it a bit more open for people to read. Here you can find more of the celly playlist!
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The end of the honeymoon phase hit you like a truck.
You and Ethan had been dating since the start of sophomore year, he had been pining over you since December of the previous year. To say that it made the boys surprised that it took him several months to muster the courage to ask you out. Usually he didn’t have those kinds of problems when it came to girls. It was meant to always be something that he could do with ease, didn’t think about game plans before he asked them out. Ethan thought that it was something that game naturally to him.
So when he finally landed up at your dorm with flowers and your favourite snacks, it was the start of something beautiful.
Ethan was truly the best boyfriend you could have asked for, he was loving, thoughtful, the type of man who knew what you wanted before you even needed to say it.
It was the closest thing to perfect that you had ever experienced. The first eight months of your relationship was truly perfect. There were no fights, no arguments, it was like the two of you were on the same wavelength every single step of the way.
Which is why it was so surprising to you when you were stood at a party with the only company of your drink. Sure you wouldn’t usually be upset but this week had been a harsh dose of reality for your relationship.
You didn’t want to say that Ethan was avoiding you because then it would mean that something was wrong. So rather than confronting him you instead decided to drink your sorrows away “you okay y/n?” Nolan asked as he made his way over from the kitchen as he realised that you were alone.
All you could do was muster a smile “yep,” you nodded as you tried to hide the pain you were facing.
Ethan clenched the bottle of his beer bottle as he watched the interaction between you and the graduate. Sure it was totally innocent but that didn’t matter to him.
The hockey player had heard the rumours that you were looking to transfer at the end of the year. It shouldn’t have come as a surprise, the team had gotten a new coach and it was safe to say that you two didn’t get along. It was sad because you loved the university, but it wasn’t worth a shitty relationship with the boss of the team.
You wanted to tell Ethan you really did. But you knew his hesitancy about long distance relationships.
The Canadian had opened up to you about how a previous attempt at one failed attempt at a long distance relationships that was forced to end due to his ex cheating on him.
So yeah, it was pretty safe to say that you didn’t want to have to tell him about your desires.
Unfortunately for you it seemed like you were going to have to when Ethan made a beeline in your direction. It caused the graduate to pat your back before he walked away.
The Canadian locked his hand with yours as he pulled you into one of the bedrooms. Usually he did that because Ethan couldn’t keep his hands off of you but something told you that this wasn’t going to be the case today. It was the way he seemed pensive, upset ultimately annoyed at something you assumed was out of your hands.
Yet oh how wrong one could be “do you even love me anymore?” Ethan asked as he ran his fingers through his hair.
You two had been arguing for at least twenty minutes now about your desire to transfer “what kind of question is that?” Of course you loved Ethan, you were ready to jump off of a cliff for him. But when your answer wasn’t what he wanted to hear it caused him to grow disappointed “one that you should answer,” it was unclear when his words left his mouth if he truly intended for them to come off as a threat.
So you ended up just staring at him “of course I love you.” Your voice was soft as you were taken aback that he even felt the need to ask.
Ethan’s lip began to almost quiver “then why are you leaving me?” The hockey player murmured as he ran his fingers through his hair.
In all honesty after arguing for as long as you two had it was causing you to grow frustrated that he seemed to not listen to your reasoning behind leaving Michigan “this isn’t about you E,” you pointed out as you sat on the random persons thankfully made bed.
This was meant to be a decision that you were meant to make for you “it has to do with our relationship!” Ethan shot back as he furrowed his eyebrows.
The hockey player knew it was stupid but he almost thought that if he could make you see how he felt then maybe you would stay. And if you didn’t the maybe a big fight was what you two needed in order to break up. Yes Ethan loved you, but he didn’t want to see you living across the country. So maybe this was the way to make it easier on his heart.
You shoved your face into your hands “I got an offer in Boston,” you mumbled as you looked back up at him. In fact there were four different offers, two were at closer universities but neither one had a coach you liked.
The boys legs turned to jelly as he sat down next to you “don’t take it,” he pleaded using the calmest tone that he had since you two got into the room.
It was like he knew that this was a battle where the dynamic had switched and he was now on the losing side of it.
You got up deciding that he was going to need space to process what you were going to say next “I’ve already said yes,” you announced as you watched his eyes go wide.
Ethan was currently in that moment when a bombshell gets dropped on you and it causes your ears to start ringing “what?” He felt winded, like he had just been punched in the chest.
It was hard when the tears began to well in your eyes “I move in August with or without your support.” It was simple, Ethan either had to get on this train or he was going to miss the stop forever.
When he remained quiet you made your way to the door letting your hand wrap around the metal handle “you walk out that door and this relationship is over.” The hockey player warned like it was meant to be a threat that dangled over you.
You sucked at your teeth “this relationship ended the second you stopped caring about how I felt about my own life.” Your comment hit him like a slap to the face. It was like you were admitting that somehow in the span of one argument that was meant to be a civilised conversation, the wheels had fallen off.
Somehow despite all of this you weren’t sad that you had just dumped your boyfriend, you were sad that he couldn’t find a way to understand you “I’ll see you around E.” In a way to say goodbye you sent him a salute before you walked out of the room leaving your boyfriend or now ex boyfriend alone.
Now that wasn’t how you thought the conversation would go.
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