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vexcraft · 4 months

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i present you: grub species swap! avian cub and vex grian with some vex scar trying to eat everyone on the side (so warning for cannibalism mentions but like in a funny way). can also be read on ao3 here!

backwards

“What did you do?!” Grian basically screams as he lunges at Cub with almost inhumane speed. Cub steps to the side, avoiding Grian more easily than he should have been able to.

Right.

Grian is considerably smaller and easier to dodge without his big bright wings that easily triple the amount of space the man needs around him even when they are neatly folded against his back. The wings that are currently not on Grian’s, but Cub’s back.

Which brings them to their current problem, which isn’t even Grian’s confused anger. At least that isn’t the main problem and Cub is fairly certain he can hopefully deal with it, though he’s no Grian-whisperer.

“Man, I didn’t do anything!” he replies, raising his hands in surrender. It was true – for once. He had nothing to do with this. The wings on his back shift as he moves, feeling unfamiliar and weird. “Not my fault, I swear!”

“You have my wings!” Grian stares at Cub like he has grown a second head instead of wings, his deep black eyes even more ominous than usual.

“Not by choice,” Cub argues. “Not everything is always someone else’s fault, y’know.”

Grian glares at him and Cub shrugs. The weight of the wings seems to put pressure on muscles Cub didn’t even know existed – hell, maybe they didn’t exist before this, who knows what the extent of these changes to his body really was? Whatever it was, it was certainly making him uncomfortable.

“I’m having kind of a hard time believing that you here, Mr. Vex Magician, don’t have anything to do with you mysteriously having my wings, ouch-” Grian flinches suddenly and pauses, sticking out his tongue. “Bit my tongue, dude, that hurt .” Cub watches the blood bleed on his lips blue. His eyes widen in realization and Grian looks at him questioningly. “What? Stop staring, you’re being weird.”

Cub sucks in a breath and ignores the feeling of feathers puffing up behind him. “You’re a vex,” he says.

Grian’s face twists from confusion to some sort of furious disbelief. “I’m what!? ” he shrieks. “Cub, what did you just say!?”

“You’re a vex,” he repeats. Suddenly things make more sense – still not enough sense, but more nonetheless. Something is very wrong, that much Cub can tell. “I’m a bird, you’re a vex.”

“An avian,” Grian corrects sourly as if that was the biggest of his concerns right now. “What do you mean? How can you even tell?”

“You’re bleeding blue,” Cub points out and Grian instantly wipes his mouth on his sleeve, staring at the stain left behind, dumbfounded. He opens his mouth to say something and Cub notes the row of pointy teeth clearly visible. “Also your teeth are sharp, like vex.” He watches Grian run his tongue over his teeth and does the same himself, noticing his own teeth are no longer like little daggers lined up but instead flat like humans and hybrids that didn’t have special diets tended to have.

“What does this mean?” Grian asks, sounding alarmed by the new discovery. “Being a vex, what does it mean for me?”

Cub thinks – what does it mean? He’s so used to his own nature and all the big and small quirks that come with it that it’s not as simple of a question as one might think. Now that he knows to look, he can tell Grian’s nails are sharper too and there’s a light blue tint to his face where normally he’d be flushing red.

“Hopefully not much,” he ends up shrugging. “If we get this fixed quickly.”

“That’s a pretty big if, considering neither of us seem to have any idea what happened!” Grian huffs. “What if we can’t get it fixed quickly, what then? Cub, vexes are weird creatures! I don’t know how any of this works!”

Cub snorts, not taking offense. “Can you hear them?” Grian shakes his head, visibly confused. “Good, good. Are you hungry?”

“I don’t think so?” he replies, taking a moment to focus on his now rather foreign-feeling body. “I feel like I could eat something but not hungry, I don’t think? Wait, what do you mean by hearing them? Can you hear them?”

“That’s normal, if you’re not feeling hungry then there’s nothing to worry about,” Cub hums. There might, most likely will, be something to worry about in the future if they can’t get this solved, but right now he’d prefer to… avoid going into certain details unless he absolutely has to. “I can usually hear the vex, but not right now though.”

He’s grown so used to the little yells and screams in the back of his head that he hadn’t even realized they weren’t there anymore. The silence is odd now that he pays attention to it, but he’s relieved to know the cacophony hasn’t moved into Grian’s head instead.

“What do you mean you can usually hear them?” Grian asks, sounding so horrified Cub is even more glad Grian apparently can’t hear them. “That’s awful, can Scar hear them too?”

“Yep,” Cub replies. He would have assumed Scar would have told Grian, considering the two were good friends, but then again, it really wasn’t that much of a big deal. “It’s kinda annoying but we’re used to it by now. It’s not too bad.”

“Doesn’t sound like something ‘not too bad’ to me,” Grian insists. “Does Xisuma know?”

“If he knows anything about vexes, then probably yeah. Seriously, it’s no big deal, I’m sure there are some bird things you don’t think are odd but others do,” Cub says, rolling his shoulders. The wings are starting to feel uncomfortable like things aren’t in the right places. “Like for example how itchy these wings are,” he mumbles, trying to reach for the itchy spot before realizing that one, he can’t reach it, and two, the wings aren’t moving in the ways he thinks they should be. “How do you even deal with this, mine are never like this-”

“You can preen them,” Grian points out with a shrug. “I’m kinda lazy with that though, so I’ve just gotten used to the discomfort. Hold on, what do you mean by your wings?”

“My vex wings. You do know that vexes have wings, right?”

Grian gapes at him and Cub pinches the bridge of his nose.

“I know the little creatures have wings!” Grian defends himself as Cub sighs in fake disappointment. “Don’t act disappointed, I’ve never seen yours or Scar’s wings, how was I supposed to know?!”

It was true neither of them really kept them visible, as they weren’t really all that useful and it was often easier to keep them hidden than to have them be on the way all the time, but still. Did this guy really know nothing about vexes at all?

“I don’t know, maybe like, look behind you or something?”

Cub watches Grian turn around a full circle, only to realize he’s trying to see something on his own back, and then trying to look over his shoulder. The wings are transparent and nearly invisible, but still very much there, just like Cub had thought they would most likely be, considering Grian would not know how to hide them with magic. Grian gawks at the wings with his mouth open, looking quite stupid in Cub’s honest opinion.

“Shut up!” Grian yells before Cub can even open his mouth to say anything. Instead, he raises an eyebrow. “Maybe I don’t know anything about vexes but that just means we really need to fix this even faster. I don’t want to like, start hearing them, or whatever that was about.”

Cub decides to not argue that he can usually hear the vexes because of his connection to the vex, which despite apparently having his species swapped with Grian, should not transfer over like that.

“Right,” he says instead. “We should probably go find Xisuma once he comes back online.”

Grian plucks his communicator out of his pocket and Cub watches his face drop in real time as he realizes they’re the only ones online. “Dude, this sucks. What if it’s a bug and the others will come back wrong too?”

The communicator in Grian’s hand pings. “We’ll see, I guess?” Cub says, recognizing the sound of a player logging on to the server.

“Scar!” Grian shouts. He makes a weird attempt to jump and it takes a second for Cub to realize he’s trying to fly. Before he can say anything, Grian has already noticed his mistake and taken off on foot, running towards the location of Scar’s base. Cub hurries behind him clumsily, weighed down by the wings against his back.

“So what exactly happened?” Scar asks curiously, unable to keep the amusement out of his voice as he watches Grian pace around the room. Cub had sat down as soon as he could once they made it to Scar’s base, tired from the running. “Cub is a bird and you’re vex? Like you got swapped somehow?”

“Cub is an avian,” Grian grumbles, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his jeans. “And we don’t know what happened, but whatever it is, I don’t like it.”

“You’re feeling fully normal?” Cub asks Scar, who certainly looks normal. No weird wings, none of his usual visible traits missing. Cub can’t sense him like he usually can through his vex magic, but that seems like a given considering the current situation.

“Yep!” Scar grins and Cub can see the row of sharp vex teeth in his mouth glimmer in the light. Yeah, everything seems normal. “Never been better in my life!”

“Can you hear the vexes?” Grian asks and Cub rolls his eyes.

“Why, of course I can!” Scar replies cheerfully. “I’d be worried if I couldn’t. They’re a little irritated that they can’t reach Cub right now, but it’s probably fine.”

“Probably,” Grian repeats, not nearly as convinced as Scar seems to be. “We need to fix this, I don’t want to end up on the vexes’ bad side because of this or something.”

Cub snorts and Scar bursts into laughter.

“Don’t laugh!” Grian hisses. “Dude, this is what people mean when they say vexes are vicious little creatures, I’m losing my marbles over here and you two are laughing!”

“You’re not going to make an enemy out of the vex because of something like this,” Cub assures, though he feels like his tone probably wasn’t as comforting as needed, considering the glare Grian sends his way.

“Cub is right! It’s very unlikely,” Scar chimes in to add. “It would be really funny though.”

“It would not!” Grian argues exasperatedly, dragging his hands down his face. “This is impossible. How is today the one day when barely anyone is online?”

“Don’t be such a downer! You both should try to get all the fun out of this while it lasts!” Scar says with an excited smile. There’s a glint in his eyes Cub can recognize as the one that never means anything good. Grian looks suspicious of Scar’s suggestion. “Cub, can I eat you? I’ve always wondered if avians taste like chicken-”

“Scar!” Grian screeches, horrified.

“Fine, can me and Grian eat you?” Scar corrects himself.

Grian stares at Scar in horror. “No one is eating anyone!”

Cub shrugs – it wasn’t the wildest thing Scar could have suggested. If he had some clue what had happened and how to fix it, he would probably be taking the opportunity to do some experimenting too. “It’s probably better we don’t die and respawn before we can figure out what went wrong,” he says. “So we don’t mess things up even more.”

“Boring,” Scar laments.

“Wait, you said you’ve been wondering what avians taste like?” Grian stares at Scar. “Have you been wanting to eat me ?”

“Well, not necessarily you,” Scar says thoughtfully. “I don’t think you would agree so it would be kinda pointless.”

“And Cub would?” he questions further.

“Usually!” Scar says happily at the same time as Cub replies, “Yes.”

The expression on Grian’s face twists from suspicious disbelief back to looking absolutely horrified as his gaze flicks between Scar and Cub like the two weren’t known cannibals due to their vex nature. Grian hadn’t witnessed it firsthand, but with how things seemed to be going, he should probably start getting used to the thought.

“We really need to fix this,” he says, looking a little pale. Scar chuckles and Grian glares at him.

“Yeah,” Cub agrees, again trying to reach for the colorful wings on his back to ease his discomfort. “I need to get these itchy wings off my back.”

“I told you that you can preen them if they feel uncomfortable,” Grian points out, taking a step towards Cub. Scar watches them curiously, tilting his head a little. It’s a habit he has that Cub is certain he subconsciously copied from Jellie.

“You do realize that I don’t usually have feathers and barely know what that means, right?”

“Well, you could have said that!” Grian exclaims, throwing his hands in the air dramatically. “You can ask for help, y’know? I’ll help you sort them out.”

Cub moves back a little, noticing the wings folding even closer to his back as he shies away when Grian tries to approach him. “I don’t want you touching me,” he says, and Grian stops to stare at him.

“So you’d rather suffer with uncomfortable wings,” he phrases his question as a statement. Cub nods and Grian rolls his eyes.

“I can help!” Scar offers, perking up a little.

“It’s true,” Grian confirms. “He knows how to preen. Kinda.”

Cub blinks – he was not aware of Scar having such skill. “Really?” Scar nods enthusiastically, always eager to help. “Okay, sure, you can help. It’s just this one spot I can’t reach that’s bothering me.”

Scar stands up and makes his way behind Cub and the chair he’s sitting on with a few swift steps, seeming to easily find the feathers that had been bothering Cub. It’s a weird feeling as Scar touches the feathers, the discomfort becoming more obvious before disappearing as he seems to rearrange the feathers.

“Why does Scar get to do that but I don’t?” Grian asks, sounding more curious than offended. Cub suspects he wasn’t all that excited to help out of the kindness of his heart, but rather feeling obliged to do so considering Cub did have his wings.

“Vex privilege,” Scar hums easily as he straightens out a few more feathers and Cub feels the bad feeling slowly disappear and some tension he hadn’t even noticed melt away from his body.

“I’m a vex now though,” Grian remarks.

“You don’t count,” Scar says cheerfully, stepping away once he deems he’s fixed the feathers. “Doesn’t work like that. You gotta sell your soul to the vex first and then you get the vex privilege.”

Cub chuckles at Scar’s explanation that isn’t really all that far-fetched despite being told like a joke. Grian doesn’t seem particularly amused by it, nor does he seem to have taken it too seriously, which is ideal considering Cub doesn’t feel like explaining the details of the vex bond between him and Scar to anyone today if he doesn’t have to.

“That hardly sounds worth it,” Grian retorts, crossing his arms.

“It’s not too bad, it’s not too bad,” Cub shrugs.

“You guys have to eat people.”

“Like Cub said, it’s not too bad!” Scar adds cheerfully. “If you’re that disturbed by it, we better get this solved before you get hungry or we’ll have to eat Cub!”

“I’m not eating anyone!” Grian argues.

“Correction, we better get this solved before you get hungry or I’m going to have to force-feed you Cub before you go insane and cause irreparable damage to yourself and others.”

Grian gawks at Scar and this time Cub has to admit that was a pretty wild thing to say, even if Scar wasn’t exactly wrong. Vexes did not like being hungry. The horrified silence that had fallen is broken by a ping from Grian’s communicator.

“Xisuma is back!”

“Oh my goodness.” Xisuma looks rather caught off guard as he stares at Cub and Grian before him, confusion visible even through his helmet that hides most of his face. “You two certainly look… a little wrong.”

“Isn’t that a little rude?” Scar comments from the side. “I don’t think they look that bad.”

“You know that’s not what I meant,” X sighs and Cub sees Scar’s trademark little smirk appear on his face as he tries to act all innocent. “What happened? Is it just you two? Scar seems fine.”

Scar smiles proudly and Grian rolls his eyes.

“Just me and Grian, so far at least,” Cub explains. “I just logged on after testing some redstone stuff in a private world and suddenly things just kinda were like this. We might have logged on at the same time or something.”

“I see… Something must have gone wrong during the materialization process. Code problems happen but I haven’t seen them like this,” the admin mumbles mostly himself. “And you’ve both been feeling alright? No sickness or glitching?”

Cub shakes his head.

“I’m starting to grow a little sick of Scar but nothing aside from that,” Grian snickers.

“Hey!” Scar exclaims, pretending to be offended.

“You threatened to force-feed Cub to me!”

Xisuma looks a little helpless as he looks between the two in confusion, eyes occasionally flicking to Cub who is mostly just enjoying the show, already more than used to Scar and Grian’s shenanigans. He shrugs and Xisuma sighs. “Alright, alright, let’s calm down now,” he says, pulling up the admin panel in his communicator. “I’ll see if I can find something in your code.”

Scar and Grian stop, freezing into an odd position that looks like Grian is trying to tackle Scar to the ground, and Scar is trying to bite Grian’s arm, before standing up straight as if nothing happened. Cub gives them an unimpressed look.

The three of them not-so-subtly inch closer to their admin to see what he's doing on his communicator as he scrolls through the lines of code none of them aside from him are familiar with. Grian yelps a little when Cub accidentally hits him with the wings, still not used to needing more space than usual.

“I’m looking at the arrival logs,” Xisuma says thoughtfully. “Cub is right, it seems you both joined at the exact same time, down to milliseconds. The server must have gotten confused trying to materialize both of you at the same time.”

“And?” Grian inquires impatiently. “Can you fix it?”

“I can correct the species you’re both assigned right now to your actual species and then hopefully a relog should do the rest.” The three of them watch Xisuma type something in the admin panel. “Alright, there we go. That should do it, hopefully.”

Grian looks a bit suspicious but nods. It’s not like they really have other options, Cub supposes. At least if something goes wrong again, Xisuma is here to help them right away this time.

“Should we just relog then?” Cub asks, quite frankly rather excited to have his own traits back.

“Yes, I think that should fix things,” Xisuma replies, looking at Cub and then Grian. “As long as you don’t log back in on the same exact second again,” he adds, amused.

“Good luck!” Scar chimes.

Grian and Cub share a look before nodding in unison. Cub watches Grian dematerialize next to him before disconnecting from the server as well.

He waits a moment before logging back on to make sure Grian has a chance to log on first.

Cub instantly feels more comfortable as the familiar world appears before his eyes. He blinks a few times, his gaze focusing on his friends standing where they had been when he left – his eyes are automatically drawn to the large and colorful wings behind Grian and a relieved sigh leaves him.

“It worked!” Grian cheers, his wings opening behind him as he does something that looks like a big stretch. Now that he knows what the wings feel like, Cub can imagine how nice that must feel. Grian flaps them a few times, gathering air under them before jumping into the air. “Oh man, how I missed flying!”

There are happy little high-pitched giggles in Cub’s head, joyous and gleeful. He smiles a little – everything feels normal again. His teeth and nails are sharp, he can tell his wings are there even if he can’t see them. He can feel his connection to Scar, and from the man’s grin, Cub can tell he can feel Cub again too.

“That was pretty wild, that was pretty wild,” Cub laughs. It feels good to be fully himself again. “Thanks, Xisuma.”

“No problem,” the admin replies as he watches Grian soar through the air. Cub can hear his smile even if he can’t see it. “I’m glad it was a simple fix, though I’ll have to look into the server code to make sure it doesn’t happen again.”

Cub hums in agreement.

“Grian!” Scar shouts, trying to get the avian’s attention. His hat nearly falls off his head as Grian flies past him. “Now that you’re a bird again, how do you feel about the whole eating thing?”

“Scar! ” Grian screams in horror. Cub and Xisuma laugh.

Everything’s back to normal.

#cubfan135 #grian #goodtimeswithscar #convexian #jules hc txt #cw cannibalism

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mother-above · 8 months

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The Golden Warrior | Chapter 3

Azriel x Reader

Summary: To you, love was a poison that slowly killed. It was something that could make the strongest of warriors and leaders weak and vulnerable. You had successfully evaded romance and relationships for a century until the day you realized it had been plaguing you from within.

Chapters: 3/?

Words: 4.5k

Warnings: suggestive, 18+, violence, and swearing

*masterlist*

a/n: thank you for reading! please lmk what you guys think! xx

Chapter 3

The moment Night Court winnowed out, you and Thesan made a beeline to his office. You settled onto a seat and propped your feet onto his desk as he plopped onto the leather chair with a huff. Thesan took a moment to check on the wards before he spoke out loud.

“Did you find out what they want? Rhysand was being such a hard-ass and gave nothing away. All we talked about were treaties and half the time-,” said Thesan as he poured himself a drink. “I was trying to get his interest away from the Golden Warrior.”

You thought about telling Thesan about the library incident, but you quickly dismissed it. Despite the Night Court being sneaky bastards, you realized that they were a powerful ally you couldn’t afford to lose. If Thesan had heard about the other events, he would undoubtedly wage war. He and the other High Lords had spilled blood for less, so it was in your best opinion to keep your mouth shut.

“A few days after Amarantha was killed, they felt a powerful surge of magic coming from Dawn Court. We must have been so distracted when you came home, that the wards you put up vanished or relaxed. It doesn’t help that I’d been forgetting to wear my jewels and must’ve weakened my hold on my magic in that period of relaxation,” you told him. “When we re-did the wards on the Palace in preparation for the Night Court, we probably fixed the wards that have kept my power hidden.”

Thesan paled as his eyes grew distant in thought. “Shit,” he said. “Ever since you were young, I’ve always helped you dampen your power. I can’t believe I forgot about it—fuck, I’m so sorry Y/n.” Guilt and concern flowed through his body and before he could freak out about his mistake, you reached over and grasped his arm. His glow dimmed as he looked at your hand, “I’m so sorry, no one was ever supposed to feel your power.”

“Don’t forget that I’m a grown female and have successfully protected the Palace and our territory for almost fifty years. I think I’ve proved that I can hold my own,” you said. “Besides, I’m partially at fault because being half-High Fae makes it hard to control my powers.”

“I wished you never had to go through that,” whispered Thesan. You just shrugged at him and smiled. What’s done is done. There were things you never told Thesan, but he found out through the other Peregryns and his sparrows when he returned from Under the Mountain. Some Fae had used the absence of Thesan as an excuse to run rampant and do whatever evil they wanted. It was you who punished and executed whenever it was necessary.

Every single day he was underneath that mountain his first thought would be of you, wondering how you were faring without him, Callon, and the others. He glanced at the scars that ran parallel to your cheekbone, a reminder of those horrid claws that hurt you. When Thesan first heard the story of how the Bogge had slashed through your golden helmet, he shuddered. High Lords were usually the only faerie powerful enough to kill a Bogge but when you told him you managed to slay it, pride and concern filled him. He made sure you were a fierce warrior, but to kill a Bogge… the extent of your magic scared him. In a way, it was better that Amarantha had no idea of your existence. If she caught a whiff of your power and what you could do, there was a good chance everyone in Prythian and the Continent would be under her rule.

You removed the glamour from the necklace to reveal brightly glowing sapphires, the power thrumming and threatening to break free. “While we’re on the topic of controlling my magic—I think I need more jewels.”

Thesan swore as he took a piece of paper and wrote down instructions to Nuan, his best tinkerer, to make you a new necklace with more siphons. With a wave of his hand, the note vanished and appeared on top of Nuan’s worktable.

“It seems Nuan got the idea of storing my power in jewels from the Illyrians,” you continued. “Azriel told me they call them Siphons too; they use it a little differently, but they have similar functions.”

The High Lord of Dawn nodded, his thoughts filled with concern over you and your magic. You were the second-best healer in all of Prythian, ranked behind your cousin. The two of you possessed the power to heal, to stop healing, and to reverse it. While Thesan was a divine and all-powerful High Lord, what made you special was your ability to poison and plague. Thesan and your parents first discovered your dark abilities when you were about 10 years old. You liked to sneak around the palace and one day you overheard an adult insult your High Fae mother for marrying a Peregryn warrior and supposedly ‘staining the High Lord’s bloodline’. The fae started calling your father slurs and before you realized it, you lifted your tiny glowing hands towards the fae and wished a horrible death. You can still remember the screams as the fae’s insides started liquifying, blood coming out of every orifice. That was when Thesan and your parents realized how powerful and dangerous you were. There were evil beings out there who would love to mold a young and impressionable fae. Thesan refused to let his little cousin be taken advantage of, so he made sure you learned to control your powers and knew how to defend yourself.

***

Days passed and so far, there was no major news from Night Court or any of the others. Things were quiet and no shadows were spotted in the halls of the Palace. Nuan had made you a brand-new necklace with 5 large blue sapphires, the biggest stone was in the middle with the other slightly smaller sapphires flanking each side. Putting it on immediately helped the restless energy that thrummed through your body, you couldn’t wait for the day you no longer had to suppress your magic.

You’ve been having dreams that interrupt your sleep, some good and some bad. The nightmares varied, sometimes they were about the creatures or faeries you killed during Amarantha’s reign, your parent’s death, or Thesan dying Under the Mountain. They always felt realistic, so whenever you woke up, it would take a few minutes for you to gather yourself and realize that it was all a dream. The worst hyper-realistic dream you had was when you dreamt of the Bogge and how its claws kept slashing into your golden helmet until it finally reached your skin. You dreamt about fighting half-blind as blood had spilled into your eye. The pain was so real and visceral, that you woke up screaming and clutching the side of your face. Thesan and Callon heard the commotion and because all bed chambers were warded against winnowing, they sprinted to your room. Callon barged in brandishing a sword until he realized you weren’t in danger. He stayed to help calm you while Thesan went to the kitchen to make you molten chocolate.

You were doing some paperwork in your office when a large yawn split your jaw. Another yawn followed and you sagged into your leather chair. You almost wished it was one of your usual nightmares, but last night’s dream was different. You dreamt of a child that you’d never seen before. The room was so dark, it had to be a cellar of some sort, somewhere underground. The soft moonlight that seeped through a caged window was the only source of light. It was a little boy who couldn’t have been more than 8 years old, it was hard to tell because you couldn’t see his face. He was hunched in the corner holding his little hands to his chest. You could have sworn you saw wings behind him, but it was so dark you couldn’t be sure. That was all you remembered from the dream, but it was enough to horrify you. Who could do that to a child? From the looks of it, it seemed like he spent most of his time in that dark place.

You woke up with a start and immediately turned on the faelights, you prayed to the Mother that this was some awful fiction your traumatized brain made up. If this little boy was real, your heart shattered for him. You didn’t get a wink of sleep after that, you kept the faelights on and waited for dawn to arrive.

***

The mysteriousness of Dawn Court was something that consumed Azriel’s thoughts, he reasoned that he couldn’t shake off that feeling of that dark dominating magic. If he was being honest with himself, it was you who his mind kept coming back to. He wasn’t sure why he kept thinking of you, was it your beauty or that incredibly confusing personality of yours? All his interactions with you made his heart flutter either from the smile you’d send him or from the anxiety that shot up when you were confrontational.

Rhys kept him busy with missions and he was more than thankful to do something that kept his mind off you. Whenever he was home in Velaris, that was when things were getting confusing for Azriel. To Azriel, Morrigan was the epitome of female beauty, someone who was strong yet elegant. He has spent 500 years fighting by her side, being her friend, and loving her. He was sure Mor knew that he loved her and unfortunately for him, she never acknowledged it. Azriel wasn’t surprised, how could someone like Mor who was Night Court royalty ever love someone like him? A bastard Illyrian?

Last night, Mor wore a revealing backless dress, Azriel would normally look away to avoid looking at her smooth skin but this time, Azriel stared. He was looking at Mor’s exposed back but not in a sexual way, he was looking because he noticed the lack of muscle and how different you were from Mor. The shadowsinger observed that you favored backless dresses and tops, there were the only things you wore during the Night Court’s stay at Dawn. It was hard not to glance at your body, you were athletic, strong, and incredibly feminine. You were so beautiful even Rhysand had taken his time to appreciate your powerful figure. When he first saw the sun-kissed skin and the dips near your shoulder blades and spine, Azriel felt his heart skip a beat. For a split second, he imagined what it would look like to see you arch and writhe beneath him. He remembered how his eyes widened and his heartbeat skyrocketed, he usually never thought of females he just met in such a lustful manner—or at least not immediately.

Azriel was shocked, he had never ever compared anyone to Mor. Feeling strange and annoyed that you were consuming most of his thoughts, Azriel drank multiple cups of wine and even let Mor convince him to join the rest of the Inner Circle for a night out at Rita’s. While his friends were dancing, Azriel sat by himself in their private booth, the music and drinks did little to distract him. His shadows swarmed around as he thought of how perplexing you were, how your sweet twinkling eyes could instantly turn cold and unnerving. He thought about sending his shadows to spy on you, but he stopped himself, you had the incredible talent of catching him when he was trying to be discreet. If you caught him one more time, he had no doubt you’d come for him in a violent rage.

He watched Mor and Cassian dance together; the Illyrian took Mor’s hands and spun her around as she threw her head back and laughed. It was a sound that Azriel loved to hear. The memory of Azriel holding you as he flew up in the sky flashed in his mind. You were happy and relaxed, your laughs sounding like the chime of bells. Shaking his head, the shadowsinger lifted the glass cup to his lips and took a long drink. Amber liquid burned down his throat and he sighed as he let the shadows entirely consume him.

***

You were eating breakfast with Thesan in one of the courtyards when one of your spies briskly walked toward you. Kerina was half Fae and half water wraith; she was one of your best and had a stern demeanor to her. Kerina bowed to Thesan before handing you her report papers, before you could thank her, she turned to address both you and Thesan.

“I have confirmation that Summer Court had sent 3 blood rubies to the Night Court. My sources are saying that they were addressed to High Lord Rhysand, Feyre Cursebreaker, and Amren.”

Thesan’s eyebrows raised but your jaw fully dropped.

“High Lord Tarquin sent out blood rubies? As in the death sentence rubies?” you exclaimed, wanting Kerina to confirm.

She nodded, “Correct. The water wraiths are telling me that two females had stolen something in one of their ocean vaults. If you need anything else, you know where to find me, my lady.”

Kerina departed and you were finally able to show your true shock to Thesan. You threw your hands in the air and the High Lord laughed.

“I can’t believe the sweet and handsome Tarquin sent Night Court those rubies. Whatever they stole… it must be so precious and important for Tarquin to declare them mortal enemies.”

Thesan looked at you with a sly smile.

“What?”

“I think you’re forgetting that Tarquin is still a High Lord, he may be young and a little naive but he’s the newest and youngest, he has to establish his dominance,” explained Thesan. “Besides, not everyone has had the pleasure to bed and be in Tarquin’s good graces.”

Last month, you had to personally deliver some documents and reestablish court alliances with Summer for Thesan. Since you had to hide your wings and suppress your magic, you became extremely restless. You wore the necklace, but it only helped for a few hours. Tarquin was a charming flirt, and it took him two days to convince you to sleep with him. The High Lord of Summer was attractive, and his personality was just as lovely, the only reason why you were hesitant was that you thought it wouldn’t be appropriate since you were Thesan’s 2nd. You quickly discovered that Tarquin did not mind at all.

You remember the energy in your body made everything feel like static, and the day your resolve faded, you returned Tarquin’s flirtatious advances. You kissed him and then you were suddenly sprawled on his expansive war table with the High Lord of Summer between your thighs. Tarquin took you on the table, his desk, and on the wall, right next to a large map of Prythian. Activities were moved to his bed chambers and that was where you rode him till—

“Ahem,” said Thesan as he cleared his throat. “Can you stop? I can scent you right now, it’s disgusting.”

Your eyes snap up at him, surprised that you had zoned out. Thesan was smirking and you threw a piece of a croissant at him. You wished you never indulged in what happened between you and Tarquin. Scowling, you shifted in your seat and gulped down some juice.

“He’s a good male, I wouldn’t be opposed if this was something you want to pursue in the future,” said Thesan. “I want you to be happy.”

Scoffing, you rolled your eyes for the second time that day. “You know how I feel about relationships. No, thank you. Besides, we agreed that it was a one-time thing that didn’t mean anything. We’re friends and will stay friends.”

Thesan shrugged. “One day you’ll take back everything you say about relationships. You’ll meet someone who is going to knock you off your feet, maybe one day you’ll be cauldron blessed and find your mate.”

You didn’t even answer with words, you just grunted in annoyance. You were never going to change your stance against relationships and romance. Your biggest secret, something Thesan doesn’t even know is you hoped you would never meet your mate. It would save you all the pain and effort of rejecting them.

Later that day you were sitting in your office with Kerina’s report spread out in front of you. Azriel hinted that there was something big happening in Prythian, so you had the spies do some digging and report anything strange happening in Prythian and surrounding countries. So far, there have been only menial land disputes and some horrible management of the dark creatures in the borderlands between Spring Court and the Wall. Looking through the papers again, you confirm nothing suspicious besides Summer Court sending the blood rubies.

Your thoughts drifted to Azriel the shadowsinger, it had been weeks since you last saw him, and you had yet to form an opinion on Azriel. Was he the most handsome male you’ve ever met? Yes. Was he a sneaky bastard who spied on your Court? Yes. To give him some credit, he told you some form of the truth when you caught him trying to sneak into the library but that was only because you threatened to end the alliance with Rhysand. Despite his spying, the male you talked with during sunrise was different. Maybe you saw a glimpse of the real Azriel, the personality he has when he’s at home and not working. As you sent in new orders to Kerina and the others, you couldn’t help but think of those cold and calculating hazel eyes.

***

A couple of months passed, and the sense of impending doom grew stronger every day. Reports of dark creatures roaming the border between Dawn and the Middle came in at a steady rate, there were enough threats that you had to go under your guise as the Golden Warrior to slay these creatures. You were a great warrior without your wings, but you were lethal when your feathers were out. You had to be careful not to use your powers because if Night Court was keeping tabs on your power signature, the others were too. The heavy presence of these creatures only confirmed your suspicions that something big was coming. Even though Callon was the Captain of the Peregeryns, you were still ranked above him, so you had them do extra training along with military exercises with the foot soldiers. Callon may be your cousin’s lover and he saw you as his little sister, but he was also extremely loyal to the Court and its hierarchy. If you told him to do something, he always obeyed without a question.

One afternoon, you were going over some paperwork when you heard a bird chirping on the balcony. Looking up, Thesan’s sparrow was hopping on the banister and whistling as if it was speaking to you. Lifting your hand, the sparrow flew and perched on your finger as it watched you with intelligent eyes. The High Lord of Dawn was the only one who could communicate with the birds, but you knew this was Thesan’s way of summoning you.

You stroked its feathered head, “Tell him I’m on my way.”

It chirped back happily and took flight. You straightened out the papers on your desk before waving a hand to turn off the faelights. Darkness engulfs the room, and you gasp, the memories of your dream last night flooding back to you. It was the second time you dreamt about that dark cellar and the little boy who sat in it. This time you heard the crying and sniffles before you could even spot his dark form sitting in the corner. The dream was strange, just like the previous one, you couldn’t move and only saw what the dream wanted you to see. It seemed like you were sitting in that cellar for hours, it was only when the boy lay down when you saw the bandages. The boy was still faceless but under the dim moonlight, you saw his little hands wrapped in cotton, blood blooming under the white cloth. All you could do was stare in horror as the pain and exhaustion lulled him to sleep.

It took you all day to forget about the horrid dream and the sounds of his weeping. Ever since the first dream you convinced yourself it wasn’t real. This heavy weight fell on your shoulders the moment you woke up, even though it happened in your sleep, it all felt real. Deep down you knew that room and that child existed, you almost sent one of the spies to do some research, but you stopped yourself. You couldn’t waste any court resources, especially now that Rhysand had called for a High Lord meeting.

Taking a deep breath, you shook your head and swiftly made your way to Thesan’s office where he sat holding out a thick piece of paper to read. Callon was already sitting on one of the chairs and gave you a wave.

“Most of the High Lords agreed to meeting, so now the only problem is agreeing to where the courts will meet,” you said summarizing the letter.

He nodded before resting his hand under his jaw and sighed. He was still so tired of all the hell he experienced with Amarantha, all the news of unrest spreading across Prythian and Hybern gave him a constant underlying headache.

“What if we offered to host the meeting? Here, in the Palace.”

He scrunched his face in annoyance because he already knew it was the best option. “Why does it have to be me?” grunted Thesan.

Callon made a face, but he didn’t interrupt, he wanted to give you a chance to assert your authority even though he disagreed with your idea.

“Because we’re closest to the middle and there is no way High Lord Kallias is going to offer to host,” you said handing the letter back to him. “Rhysand would have already offered but most of the courts don’t like him and all the other High Lords except for Tarquin seem like jackasses that won’t agree to host.”

Thesan frowned, “When did I become the friendliest High Lord?”

You snorted. “I wouldn’t say most friendly…maybe most tolerable? You’re the only High Lord in existence who has stayed mostly neutral in past battles and disputes. It makes sense for us to be the hosts, there's less of a chance these suspicious High Lords are going to think we’re going to double-cross anyone.”

Feeling the need to raise his concerns, Callon politely cleared his throat. “I don’t know—the security concerns… there could be fights that could level this Palace.”

“We have special wards to avoid magic and ensure fairness whenever all the High Lords come to gather but Callon’s right. I’m sure someone is going to find a way to break through the shields and cause all kinds of trouble,” said Thesan.

You glanced at the gleaming siphons around your neck and then at the two males. “This meeting needs to happen, and Rhysand knows it too, his letters feel so desperate. If a fight whether physical or magical breaks out, I’ll neutralize it,” you said gingerly touching the sapphires. “I’ll unleash my power if I have to.”

Thesan’s frown deepened. “No—I don’t know, it’s too dangerous.” His rich brown eyes clouded with that overbearing concern.

Your jaw clenched as you stared at your cousin. “You promised me that I would get to decide when I would reveal my powers and the Golden Warrior. Now it seems like the perfect time with a potential conflict coming and someone’s bound to find out. If Night Court noticed, I’m sure the others did too.”

Thesan looked at you coolly not wanting to lose his temper. You were right, it was only a matter of time before someone found out what you were. He was afraid of the repercussions you would get when people find out that you and the Golden Warrior were the same person. Thesan’s enemies were your enemies and with the added revelation of the Warrior, he was sure that list would double. He wasn’t ready to share how powerful you were, in fear of making that target on your back even bigger but Thesan knew it was no longer his call. He has kept you hidden long enough, it was time for you to spread your wings.

“Okay,” he said quietly. “You get to call the shots with your powers from now on, you deserve it.”

With a grin, you lunged at Thesan to hug him before you settled down to help him draft a letter to the High Lords.

***

The preparations for the High Lords' arrival took all your time and energy and you slept through the night with no memory of the dreams you had. Despite dreamless nights, that dark cellar haunted your thoughts to the point you wanted to find that wretched place and rescue the child and burn it to the ground. Thesan had Callon and other Peregryns do over the security while you and other courtiers who were gifted with magic began enforcing more wards and shields on the Palace. This type of magic was so specific it took all your concentration as you learned from one of the older Fae how to properly enforce specific protective shields you’ve never used before. When Thesan was available to help with the wards, he sent you off to visit the cities and ensure that Nuan’s compounds that defended against faebane were being produced efficiently.

The Night Court was also doing their due diligence and making backup plans for their backup plans just in case it turned to shit in Dawn Court. Azriel, Cassian, and Rhysand peered down at a map of the Palace and came up with many escape plans. Cassian and Rhysand were anxious about the visit, but Azriel was a little more concerned about the strange female that had been plaguing his thoughts. Shadows pooled over his shoulders and blocked his brother’s view.

“Uh, Azriel… what’s going on?” asked Cassian. “I haven’t seen you this anxious about a meeting before.”

Azriel’s beautiful features stayed neutral, but his crossed arms and taut muscles betrayed him. He didn’t want to admit that he’d been anxious to see you again, it’s been a long time since anyone has taken his mind off the torture of loving Morrigan. He found the last few months to be different. He still blushed every time Mor gave him attention. Like the time she brushed past him and squeezed his arm or when she propped her feet onto his thighs when everyone was lounging around the living room drinking wine. Then there were the times Mor would pull away or avoid his gaze, these moments would usually sour his mood for the entire day, but nowadays everything stung less.

#azriel fanfic #azriel x reader #acotar fanfiction #azriel shadowsinger #acotar #azriel x you #slowburn #azriel fan fic #azriel acotar

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madlad-sadgal · 9 months

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I got bored again, so for the third time, here are random things I noticed throughout my rewatch of Nimona.

As always, Nimona Spoilers!

To start off, a few people pointed out how the first time Nimona shows up on screen, we see her doing a graffiti of the word dumb. Also, rewatching some of the scenes, in the scene where she shows the new murder wall, you can make out the word "Nemesis" written over Ambrosius' picture. Also, if you look at the very top of the wall, we can see a drawing of Bal's prosthetic with flames coming out of it with the words "Literal Firearm" written under it. So, I rethought it, and realized Gloreth was probably the first human Nimona had ever seen (as far as we know), so Gloreth probably taught her to speak, write and read, except this was a thousand years ago, and language constantly evolves, and we can all agree that "From whence you came" and "Nemesis" aren't really phrases or words people seem to use. So, I think Nimona probably has some knowledge when it comes to reading and writing, both thanks to Gloreth and just picking up bits and pieces throughout those 1000 years, but she still has trouble when it comes to full on writing actual long phrases to create like an essay or something like a resume.

When she pins back Am's picture on the wall, we see a post it with "Disrupt the System" written and highlighted on it.

We get a hint that Nimona might be "Gloreth's monster" when we see a drawing of her in dragon form that kinda resembles the dragon we see at the beginning in the scrolls.

When Bal calls Nim a monster, there is literally a newspaper cut out on the wall next to him with his picture and the word "Monster" written on it.

We get a bit of insight on the type of pressure Ambrosius suffers from when we get back to the Institute. All the other knights seem to think it's his fault for not having stopped Bal from escaping, despite a whole horde of knights chasing after him and not one of them even coming close to stopping him from escaping either. The other knights, despite probably not knowing the full extent of it, seem to be aware of the close relationship between the two of them, putting him under even more pressure because of that small fact.

When the Director stops the fight between Ambrosius and Todd, she tells them; "Look at you, acting like common children." Reminder that everyone is fully aware that Bal was a commoner and is currently suspected to having killed the queen. She is basically telling them; "Those people are very clearly below us and one of them is a murderer and a villain, and yet you are acting like them."

When Am volunteers to lead the manhunt for Bal, we can clearly see him go slightly worried for Bal as Todd is talking about how he'll make Bal pay. He probably volunteered because he wanted to lessen the chances of Bal getting hurt.

Like I mentioned in another post, Nimona often tries to get Bal to understand that the Institute is filled lies, but not by directly telling him. She starts by giving little hints. One example of him is when she tries to tell him that maybe there's nothing over the wall. I talk about it more in this post.

Nimona's little pink streak in her hair

Nimona is quick enough to go up an escalator that goes down, but a literal knight who has gone through harsh training isn't.

Todd knows that Am's hair smells like lavender. In flower language, lavender is associated with purity, silence, devotion, caution, serenity, grace and calmness. That sounds an awful lot like qualities the Institute would expect a direct descendant of Gloreth to posses, doesn't it?

I'll stop here, cause this is starting to get long.

Unrelated, but I decided to watch Nimona with my siblings (13, 7 and 5) and they all loved it. The best part for me was that my homophobic aunt watched the bit where Bal and Am kiss, started freaking out that I was pushing it onto them, and then my 13 years old brother just commented about how she kept forcing him to watch her romance movies with her and was always pushing him to "get a girlfriend for them to meet" and she just shut up and left. Just wanted to put that out there.

Might make another one of these if y'all like this!

#nimona #ballister boldheart #nimona movie #ambrosius goldenloin #ballister x ambrosius #goldenheart #nimona 2023 #nimona netflix #nimona spoilers #I am obsessed with this movie #My hyperfixation has been going on for a while and does not seem anywhere close to ending

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mynameismckenziemae · 5 months

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Ain’t No Sunshine When She’s Gone-Chapter VII

We Robert ‘Bob’ Floyd x Female Reader (no use of y/n)

She’s always gone too long

(previous chapter here, next chapter here)

Warnings: talk of medical stuff (sutures, blood, needles, etc)

“They’re being evaluated by medical now.”

A wave of nausea hits you at Penny’s words. Relief that he’s alive, along with everyone else, but fearing the extent of his injuries. You plop down beside her on the stairs with a heavy sigh. Penny squeezes your shoulder before rubbing a hand over your back.

“Does it get easier? The deployments?” You ask, already knowing the answer.

“No. It doesn’t. All you can do is try not to worry and pray they make it back.” She replies.

________________________________________

Waiting is the worst part. You and Steve hang out with Penny and Amelia in the house for the day, watching Nicholas Sparks movies on the couch.

Your phone starts to buzz. It’s a text from Jake.

Jake: Hey Sun. I haven’t seen them yet, but I think they’re okay. They took them to medical on scoop stretchers as a precaution but heard Nat bitching about it, and you know she would’ve been a wreck if she wasn’t sure Bob was good. You okay?

Tears of relief spring to your eyes. You feel like you can breathe again. He’s right, Natasha would’ve been fighting them every step of the way if Bob hadn’t responded to her.

Sunny: Oh thank God. I’ve been worried sick. I’m okay now. Thank you thank you thank you for telling me. Are you okay? Did you see them come in?

Jake: No problem, I’d want to know too if I wasn’t here. I heard them take the hit and about lost it. But Nat was so calm. Bob too, as usual. Just calmly asked them to deploy the barrier net as it was gonna be rough. I thought I was gonna puke. But she landed it perfectly under the circumstances, like always.

You get a picture from him and gasp when you open it—it’s a gorgeous, white-gold diamond engagement ring.

Jake: Don’t say anything, but I’m asking her to marry me when I get to see her. I’ve had the ring for a while, just been trying to plan the perfect proposal. But after today I realized it doesn’t matter, she doesn’t care. Life’s too fucking short.

Sunny: OMG JAKE! It’s gorgeous! She’s going to love it! Congratulations!

Jake: Don’t jinx it! She hasn’t said yes yet. 😬

Sunny: Lol, there’s no doubt in my mind that she will. I better get an invite to the wedding.

Jake: Of course, if Nat doesn’t steal you as a bridesmaid, you’ll be standing with me as a groomsman. I think you can pull off a tux.

Sunny: Haha, I don’t know about that. I’d do it for you though.

Sunny: Nat told me you wanted to kill Derek that night at the Hard Deck. I’m really glad you didn’t (you’re too pretty for prison), but thank you for being my corner.

Jake: I would’ve in a heartbeat (I look good in orange) but I couldn’t have lived with myself if he would’ve hurt you because I stepped in. I’m sorry I didn’t see the signs sooner and wasn’t there for you.

Sunny: It’s not your fault. Nor is it mine I’ve come to realize. I’m just glad he’s gone and I can talk freely to you guys again.

Jake: Me too. I missed you. Hey, I gotta go. I think one of the nurses is coming. I’ll keep you updated if Bob can’t have his phone.

Sunny: Sounds good, thanks again, Jake. Go get your girl!

________________________________________

You fill Penny and Amelia in on what Jake’s told you, leaving the proposal out since it’s not your news to share. Soon after, Penny leaves the room to take Pete’s call.

Amelia heads out too, going to get ready to hang with friends now that the dark cloud hanging over you all has lifted.

Soon Penny is back, offering no updates other than that they should hopefully be stateside again in the next day or two.

You head back up to your apartment to feed Steve his supper when you get another incoming text, this time from Nat.

Nat: Hey, Bob’s okay! He has a cut on his cheek from the glass and some bruising on his chest from the restraints, but he’s okay. I just got discharged and doc was going in by Bradley next, and then Bob.

You take a deep breath, the weight finally lifting from your chest.

Sunny: THANK YOU. I don’t even know what to say. I can’t express to you how grateful I am for getting him got him back. How are you?

Nat: I told you I’d bring him back safe. I’m great actually. 💍

A picture comes through of her and Jake. Tear-stained faces pressed together and grinning from ear to ear as she holds up her left hand, showing off her new ring.

Sunny: CONGRATULATIONS! What a beautiful ring! I’m so happy for you two!

Nat: He did good, didn’t he? I hate to do this, but can I let you go? Jake wants to call his mama and show her.

Sunny: Of course! Thank you again. Love ya.

Nat: Love you! See you soon!

________________________________________

Bradley calls soon after.

“Hey Sunny girl, how are ya? Holding up okay?”

“Hey, yeah I’m good now that I know you’re all okay. How are you?”

“Physically, I’m fine, I didn’t need medical but it’s protocol if you’re hit. Mentally though? I’m a little shaken up actually.” He replies, the vulnerability in his response surprising you.

“Will you tell me about it?” You ask, phrasing it that way so he doesn’t feel pressured.

“Yeah, okay. I knew they had me locked in and I barrel-rolled to avoid the brunt of it, but in that split second I—I know it sounds cliche but my life flashed before my eyes. I thought I was done for, that I’d be seeing my rents again soon,” voice shaking, he continues, “The whole flight back I just kept thinking about everything I haven’t experienced, I mean I’ve done some cool shit in my life but…I don’t have anyone to share it with. No one to come home to, just an empty, quiet house. I don’t mean—I…I know I have you back again, I’m so grateful for that, and your mom and dad have never stopped trying, even though I keep them at arms length. Fuck, this isn’t coming out right at all, sorry.” He laughs wetly through his tears. “I just wanna love someone like my dad loved my mom, you know? Marriage, kids all that. Man, who knew almost dying would turn you into a sap?”

Your heart hurts for him. “I understand. It’s okay to want those things. You’ll find her.”

“I hope so. If not, I’ll just join you and Bob. We can be a throuple.” He replies, voice clearer now, back to his antics.

You laugh. “Maybe not that, but you know I’m always here for you, right? My parents too. And Mav and Penny. We all love you.”

“Yeah, I know. Thanks, Sunny girl. Hey, I think Bob’s about done. I’ll let you go. See you in a few days, alright?”

“Sounds good, can’t wait to see you all” you reply, hanging up.

________________________________________

You lay on the couch and Steve joins you, plopping down with a heavy sigh on your chest, pushing the air out of your lungs. You laugh and boop his nose. “You’re relieved too, huh?”

Your heart begins to pound when your phone rings. You accept the FaceTime and burst into tears as his sweet face appears, looking as handsome as ever, even when sporting a neatly sutured cut on his cheek.

“Oh no, I’m okay. I’m so sorry, honey. Please, don’t cry.” He says, slurring slightly.

“No, I’m sorry, I’m just so relieved. Are you okay? You sound funny.” You ask, laughing as Steve’s head pops up when he hears Bob.

“Yeah,” he yawns. “So I really don’t like needles. And they told me they had to numb the cut first so they could put stitches in. Then they pulled out this big needle and were about to stick it in my face to numb it. But then I got super lightheaded and the nurse told the doctor I was going…vasovaginal or something? Then they laid me down and put my feet up for a few minutes and gave me…a lousy-pam pill? I think that’s what they said, I don’t know, it made me tired though. I told them I don’t have a vagina though. Why would they say that Sunny?”

You bite your lip to keep from laughing as you answer. “It sounds like you had a vasovagal reaction, which just means you were about to faint. It happens all the time when needles are involved. They put your feet up to get the blood flowing back to your head. The pill sounds like it was lorazepam, to help you relax to have the stitches done. Which looks good, by the way.”

“Oh…okay. That makes sense. God, you’re so smart, Sun” he chuckles.

“Thanks,” You smile, tears already drying.

He is going to be mortified tomorrow if he remembers this.

You can see he’s fighting to keep his eyes open. “I’m sorry, but I think I’m gonna go to bed. I’m just so tired.”

“I understand. I’m just glad I was able to see you. Do you know if anyone called Annie?”

“I’m not sure, could you though? And tell her I love her?” He mumbles, eyes drifting closed, the phone dropping slightly in his hand.

“Yeah, I’ll call her. Goodnight. I’m so glad you’re okay”.

“Me too. Night, love you”. He replies, hanging up.

Even though you know it's a slip off the tongue, your heart stutters.

________________________________________

You shoot a text to Annie asking if she has a few minutes to chat and she calls you nstantly.

You tell her what happened and apologize for not getting in touch sooner, but you didn’t want to worry her while she’s on vacation until you knew more.

“It’s okay, I understand and appreciate it.” She assures you, talking over the girls who are yelling for her in the background. She lets you go after promising her a coffee date when she’s back.

You let Steve out a last time, get your work stuff ready for the next day, and fall into bed early, utterly exhausted from the stress of the day.

________________________________________

Bob wakes up the next morning stiff and sore, but feeling well rested. As he’s stretching the kinks out, the conversation with Sunny comes rushing back to him. He groans as he remembers telling her about fainting over a needle. He feels like he might be sick when he recalls saying ‘I love you’.

He doesn’t have time to dwell on it though, as Bradley knocks on the door, giving him a 5-minute warning before their debriefing.

________________________________________

You check your phone on your lunch break and you have a single unread text.

Penny: They’ll be back tonight by 6.

________________________________________

A/N: Sorry for the little cliff hanger last night. I think this is the first chapter I’ve written with no smut lol. Any one catch on to what I’m setting up for Bradley?

Taglist:

(I added whoever liked the post about being added to my taglist, lmk if you want off of it)

@blindedbythelightt

@sweetwhispersofchaos

@getmyprettynameoutofyourmouth

@lexixstewart

@phoenix-rising-starbird-one

@mrsrobertfloyd

#robert bob floyd #bob floyd #bob floyd x reader #jake seresin #top gun maverick #natasha phoenix trace #bradley rooster bradshaw #pete mitchell #aint no sunshine when she’s gone

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deaddovestellnotales · 1 month

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Reasons why Raistlin resonates with me as a disabled person :V

He is *actually* disabled, so the disability / chronic illness actually makes his life miserable sometimes and it's not just written as a special ability that makes him extra strong or that he can just magic away (get it magic away ahahah)

The sibling dynamic is very realistic. yall have you ever considered how the "power" imbalance between siblings because of disability can fuck them both up?`?? Like you don't want to be dependant on your sibling and your sibling is either not understanding or too understanding and think they need to do everything for u

Generally being seen just as a person who needs help and a liability?? And kind of like a burden? Have had it happen to me, the therapist of my sis very literally said that it was my fault that my sister wasn't getting enough attention from my parents (bc I was very sick when I was a child, and disability in general)

You see everyone else run ahead of you and get out there in life while you're always stuck in the back. Bc no matter how much more accessible life becomes, it cannot change the fact that you can't do some things. And that you will to a certain extent never be able to achieve those things in the same way.

Disability actually still is a thing that often times is the only defining personality (or gender) that other people prescribe to u. They won't even look at you instead they see someone they need to help (I mean useful, yes, if you need help, but also annoying af if you want to be seen as an actual person . . . )

If you don't get mental health treatment u end up like raistlin bitter and pretty cynical and passive aggressive --> he should have gotten treatment but we all know how that went

THANKS FOR COMING TO MY TED TALK

#raistlin majere #dragonlance #dnd

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crowleysgirl67 · 5 months

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Touches

Author: @crowleysgirl67

Word Count: 2256

Parings/Characters: Bucky x Reader (Eventual), Avengers team, Nat x Steve,

Warnings: AU ish i guess, show warnings, idk

A/N: Thanks for reading!

Steve had brought Bucky to the tower. It was awkward as you all stood there as he introduced him and Bucky kept avoiding looking anyone in the eye. You were tired of the awkwardness so you stepped forward.

“I’m (Y/N). It’s a pleasure to meet you Sargent Barnes. I hope we can all make you feel welcome and comfortable here.” you extended your hand to him as you emphasized the all as you gave Tony a look. He wasn’t sure about him and was still pissed about the Winter Soldier killing his parents.

He grumbled under his breath but stayed silent.

“(Y/N) your glov…” Nat started but it was too late as Bucky took your hand in a firm shake as he introduced himself. You sucked in a deep breath as his memories filled your head and you dropped to your knees. You’d seen some horrible shit in people's memories before but none had made you drop to your knees in agony the way Bucky's memories were.

“What’s happening? What’d I do?” Bucky asked, concerned he’d done something wrong.

“She has powers, she can know everything about a person just by skin to skin contact. There’s more but no one knows the extent of them.” Steve replied grimly. He’d known whatever happened to his best friend had been bad but he was unaware of just how bad it was. He’d seen you work before, brought in when the bad guys weren’t giving up information, or they were withholding more than what little they were giving up. Some made you grimace but nothing had you on the floor like you were now.

Bucky looked taken aback and horrified. Steve pulled him back away from you as Nat barked orders for everyone to give you breathing room. It was several minutes before you were able to regain composure.

“(Y/N) are you alright?” Nat asked, kneeling besides you.

“Yeah. Yeah I’m ok.” you rasp as you make your way to standing up.

Nat took hold of your elbow and helped you up. You shot her a grateful smile as you felt drained and not as steady on your feet.

“What the hell was that?” Tony demands “That’s never happened before.”

“I don’t have enough energy to deal with this right now. We can discuss it later.” you brushed his question off.

Tony looked like he wanted to argue but he knew better. “Fine. But you’re going to the med bay to get checked out.” The two of you stared at each other.

“Ugh, fine but only because I’m too tired for this shit.” you relented.

***

Steve showed Bucky around the compound and the room he’d be staying in.

“I’ll let you get settled. My room is down the next hall if you need me.” Steve pats him on the back.

“Thanks,” he replied, stepping into the room. It was a room, a bed with a bathroom attached and some closet space. A tv hung on the wall across from the bed. He left the door open as he pushed further into the room. He flicked the bathroom light on and looked around. It was a nice bathroom with a shower and a separate freestanding tub. He turned the light out and went back into the main part of the room, footsteps from the hall catching his attention.

Thinking it was Steve again he stepped out of the room and just about into you.

“Sorry.” he said, taking a step back.

“Not your fault.” you replied. “I should watch where I’m going. I’m not used to people in this hall.”

He looked you over before replying. You seemed better than you had been earlier. “What do you mean?”

“My rooms the next one over. Nobody else is in this hall. Well I guess now you are.”

He gives you a puzzled look, “Why hasn’t anyone else been here?”

“Mostly cuz Tony is worried my powers could do something. While I mostly have control they can still be unpredictable even to me. He doesn’t say anything to me but I can feel his hesitation and see his thoughts.” you head toward your room as Bucky follows.

“What is it that you can do exactly? If you don’t mind me asking. Steve said you get people's memories by skin contact.” He was curious, naturally. All the shit he’d been through, things he’d never wish on another person had been thrown onto you.

You beckoned him in as he hesitated in your doorway. He was still hesitant but stepped further into the room as you sat on the bench at the foot of your bed to take off your shoes.

“Have a seat.” you gestured to the chair in the corner. “What do you want to know?”

He took a seat, “The memories, do you get all of them?”

“Yes, any memories a person has I get with a touch. Their thoughts, feelings, things like that. In rare cases if the emotions are intense enough I will in essence experience what they went through.”

“Did you… Were mine one of those times?” he licked his lips.

“Yes.” you weren’t going to lie to him. “But don’t feel bad. You didn’t know what was going to happen. I should have been more careful about having my gloves on with someone new around.”

“I’m sorry.” He felt guilty in a way, like sure it wasn’t his fault but it was still the fucked up shit in his head.

“It isn’t your fault James.” you say softly.

He swallowed and ignored the rush of feeling that came with the sound of his name from your lips, “Is it contact via your hands only or does any skin contact trigger you?”

“Any. It's why I don't wear clothing that reveals skin. Long sleeves only if I'm out in public.”

“What makes here so different?” he asked, noting you in a tank top and leggings.

“Prolonged contact with everyone. Once I've touched a person I already have everything about them. If I touch them again even accidentally the only new information I receive is their memories, thoughts, feelings etc.. from between the last time I touched them and the new touch. Enough exposure and I don’t need touch to be in tune with them. I sense their feelings and can, if I focus, see their thoughts without touching them.”

“So downstairs earlier, staring with Stark. You were assessing him?” Bucky took an educated guess based on what you’ve told him so far.

You let out a surprised laugh, “Yeah, yeah I guess I was.”

***

Over the next few months you formed a close relationship with Bucky. He trusted you because you knew the truth about what happened to him, albeit in an unexpected manner. You hadn’t had skin contact again since the first time, so his rising crush on you had seemed to escape your freaky sense gaze.

“Barnes.” Tony greeted as he walked into the common area. “Have you seen (Y/N)?”

“Stark.” he returned the greeting. “No I haven’t she said something about helping Nat with some project, I don’t know.”

“If you see her let her know I need to see her.” he walked away and Bucky shook his head. You had an odd relationship with Stark and he was never sure what to make of it. You didn’t seem to be in a romantic relationship, and if you were it wasn’t obvious. If he was honest he really didn’t want to think about the possibility of you being in a romantic relationship if it wasn’t with him. He knew the rabbit hole he would go in with thoughts like that so he got up to go in search of you. He tried the usual haunts, your bedroom, the gym. The lab was an obvious no since Stark was looking for you and that’s where he usually was.

Taking a chance that maybe Steve would know where you were he went down the hall where his bedroom along with Nats was. Giggling from Natashas room had him skipping Steves and making his way down to hers.

“That’s actually pretty cool. When did these pop up?” It was Nat speaking, the cracked door was enough for him to hear the conversation clearly.

“They’ve been here awhile. I just hadn’t had any real reason to try to strengthen them.” this time it was you who spoke.

“That reason wouldn’t happen to be a tall hunk of a man would it?” Nat teased. Bucky heard a thump and a muffled “Hey” from Natasha.

“Shut up Nat.”

“Fine, but only if you show me more of that. Can you do it for others?”

“I don’t know. I can try. Where’s Steve? I’m sure he’ll let me use him as a guinea pig.”

“Whoa no wait come back!” Nat exclaimed.

The door to the room flung open as your giggling figure ran out and straight into Bucky.

“Oof,” you grunted and wrapped your hands around strong biceps as you caught yourself.

“Shit (Y/N)! Are you alright?” He put his hands on your hips to steady you.

“I’m fine. What are you doing out here?”

“Looking for you. Stark wants to see you.”

“He can wait. Where’s Steve? I wanna show him something cool with Nat.” you grin up at him, excitedly.

“Don’t you dare (Y/N)! I’ll tell him about your crush!” Nat appears in the doorway.

“What crush?” Bucky questions looking down at you.

“Her crush on you.” Nat smirks as you blush, aware of the fact Bucky had yet to release your hips, and you your grip on him.

“Thanks a lot Nat! I’m totally showing Steve now.”

“You have a crush on me?” he was shocked but also excited at the prospect you liked him back.

“Yes.” you bit your lip, a habit he noticed you did when nervous.

“Well then I really think you should use your power on me again Supergirl.” he wet his lips. He was ever so aware that you were about to get every little detail about what he thought of you.

You lowered your hand down to his exposed forearm, gently coming to rest your bare hand against his skin. Your eyes widen as you blush more.

Nat chuckling breaks your spell and the red in your cheeks darkens as you remember you have an audience.

“To be continued.” you whisper up at him.

“Agreed.” a playful smile graced his face. “Now what was it you needed Steve for?”

“Nat and Steve sittin’ in a tree.” you start taunting, giggling. Nat lunged at you and you evaded her by hiding behind Bucky.

“What’s going on?” Steves voice rang through the hall.

An evil grin spread across your face as you dart in his direction.

“Run supergirl I got you covered.” Bucky laughs as he grabs hold of Nat.

“Don’t you dare (Y/N)!” She screeches.

Steve has a perplexed look as he takes in the sight of whatever this was as he approaches.

“I can do a cool new thing. Care to be my test subject?” you bounce on the balls of your feet, excitedly. “It won't hurt, promise. Nat and I tried it earlier.”

“No! We just tried you, showing me your feelings! You haven’t tried transference of someone else's feelings!”

“No better time to try!” you grabbed Steve's hand and pulled him over to Nat and took her hand. Your eyes flashed gold as you focused on Steve first. He liked Nat but let his feelings of not belonging in this time and his intense crush on Peggy get in his way. You took his liking of Nat and brought it forward, focusing you held your breath as you moved it to Nat. Her soft inhale let you know it worked, you let her feel them a few moments before pulling back. You repeated the process of showing Steve her emotions, before releasing their hands and stepping back.

Bucky had released his hold on her and moved to your side, draping his arm around your waist. Nat and Steve stared at each other processing what just happened.

“Let’s give them some space.” he said, pulling you back down the hall. You made your way down to your own hall. “So what was that?”

“I was able to show their feelings for each other to them. So Steve felt that Nat liked him and vice versa.”

“Nat mentioned something about you showing her your feelings?”

You nod, “Do you maybe wanna try that?” you ask shyly.

“Only if you want to, doll.” he squeezed your hand gently.

“Come on.” you pulled him into your room and got comfortable on the bed. You pat the bed beside you and he sat down. Taking his hands in yours you begin the process of showing him your feelings for him. You were so focused that him pulling you in for a kiss surprised you. The connection was lost as you squeaked in surprise.

His lips were warm and slightly chapped as they pressed against yours. Your arms snaked their way around his neck as he deepened the kiss. The kiss lasted for what felt like hours, before he pulled back and rested his forehead against yours.

“Wow.” you smiled and he chuckled.

“I’d like to take you out on a proper date.”

“I’d like that, and you may. But first I want you to do all those dirty thoughts to me.” you giggle as he groans low in his throat.

“As you wish, my supergirl.” he kisses you again.

#bucky barnes x reader #james buchanan barnes #marvel fanfiction #marvel #marvel reader insert

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fangirleaconmigo · 1 year

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Guys. I'm gonna be very real with you here. And I'm sure it will piss off a few people. So I'm not tagging it. You can rb if you want, but I'm not tagging it. This is for you to do with as you please.

Ok. Here it is. We don't know what happened behind the scenes. We don't. We truly don't. And please be real.

HCav (not using the full name because I don't want to put it in the search results) is a massive global superstar, gorgeous, rich, beloved, AND incredibly incredibly incredibly good at pr. He has legions of fans and more access to media than almost any other celebrity.

All he has to do is very tactfully, in a few interviews, refuse to compliment the writers and instead steer the conversation to his love of the books, and voila. When he leaves this show, everyone blames someone else. Like. I've seen like two people mad at him. That's it. And that is what he did. He is very very smart.

This is the man who managed to convince millions of nerdy fanboys that he is 'just like them' that he is 'one of them'. Do you know how hard that is for someone who looks like him? lol

It used to be that when Hcav was cast in something nerdy, they'd bitch. "He's too pretty" (they want to project hard onto the hero, and their ideal is a rugged man which they associate more closely with old fashion masculinity. They also always complain the opposite of the female lead...she's never pretty or hot enough. But that's a different convo.) But despite that, HCav has painstakingly convinced them over the course of several years, that he is 'just like them'. It's like...the miracle that he has pulled off is THEE pr accomplishment of this century.

I am not saying that HCav is not a nerd. I'm not saying that he doesn't work hard or take the material seriously. I'm saying that it is far too easy for everyone watching this unfold, to just call him Jesus, and vilify everyone else, all while have zero fucking idea of what happened behind the scenes.

"Yes but Des, we know it's the writers' fault, because the show writing does suck, and the showrunner herself says that Cav was always the one who tried to fit in passages from the books."

Yes. Ok. But the problem I have with the writing is never the details. It's the overarching plotlines. HCav knew her vision when he signed on. When he fought for that role. They had so many meetings. Netflix told her to carry out her own vision, that's what she said she'd do, and he knew that.

All I'm saying is, no matter what you think of the writing, he is not a passive victim here. He was not betrayed. It's just grown folks having differences. That's it! And he couldn't write that show. Him adding lines here and there is the easiest thing. Would he be able to write an entire season's worth of scripts? (It's harder than it looks. It takes years of honing that craft.) No. He wouldn't, nor would he want to. The pay cut alone would be so staggering I'm sure he would have to sell several ocean front properties.

"Yes, but Des, the former writer said that people on the show hate the books. Surely that drove him away."

Babes. The guy who said that is the one who wrote S2E2 AND Nightmare of the Wolf. lmaoooosob. I would rather have a writer on the show who critiques some elements of the books (THEY ARE NOT ABOVE CRITIQUE) but actually understands what a witcher is and what that means in context of class, and who understands their oppressions, than someone who thinks the books are perfect, but took from those books that witcher are....THAT. That Vesemir is THAT.

Secondly, again, we don't know what happened. Another staff writer implied on twitter that there was ego and abuse issues. So WE DON'T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED.

The point is, it is sooooooooooo fucking easy when you've left to blame everyone else. That's petty as shit what that departing writer did, and like...it works! It is guaranteed to work and he knew it.

Which leads us to the most uncomfortable truth here, and that is that what that writer did and to a lesser extent what HCav did, is weaponize a multitude of these racist cishet white nerdboys who harass and loathe Anna and Anya and Mimi and all these woc. These people live in a constant abusive rage online, and the root of their rage is that the witcher is diverse and 'woke'. If you haven't been on twitter or reddit or youtube and seen the relentless vile open racism in the most organized and loudest elements that attack the writers and Lauren, then I envy you. It is a cesspool.

When that departing writer threw them under the bus, he knew exactly what would happen and who he would rile up.

"Are you implying that if you hate the writing, you're misogynistic and racist."

No. Obviously not. I have criticized the writing and I will probably continue to do so on occasion.

I've been accused of being a 'book purist' but I assure you I'm not. Just give me good writing. Just give me a good story. And keep the characters true to their spirits. And if that isn't what is delivered, I might write a post with critique in it.

But what I won't do is publicly pile on people, on human beings, for business decisions and deals that happen behind the scenes, people who have no control over this, no fame, and no way to defend themselves.

This is how it works.

The showrunner decides the plot of the season. The staff writers are assigned episodes. They write what they're told to write. A lot of these staff writers and writer assistants make near poverty wages (for people living in L.A. Dear god. The cost to live there is staggering).

What I'm not gonna do is publicly blame them for driving away 'poor little hcav' lmao this incredibly incredibly powerful, wealthy global superstar who makes his own fucking decisions and whose race and gender protects him if his money and fame didn't.

Were there creative differences? Probably.

Did he also walk out on a show instead of working it out because he got a better offer? Definitely.

And was he INCREDIBLY INCREDIBLY savvy about very gently and subtly throwing them under the bus in every interview in order to preserve his fanboy following and his reputation going forward?

YES

Because these studios know that if they adapt existing properties of these past comic books and novels and then they put a foot wrong, they will have legions of these toxic racist cishet white nerdboy fuckers review bombing, harrassing, stalking, making rape and death threats to actors, and if they get HCav they know that's not going to happen. The fanboys worship the ground he walks on. The fact that he delivers that to them is a HUGE plus in his favor. And then he also delivers the straight women. (and the bis, we won't leave us out, I did think he looked great grimy in a bathtub)

The issue is, back in the day, when these adapted properties (in the broader sense) novels and comic books were being published, 99% of English language publishing was run by white men and everyone else was excluded. If we are going to adapt them today, we can choose to uphold that white supremacy by continuing to exclude every other race from participating in the projects, thereby extending that white supremacy, and becoming agents of it, or we can cast the best actor for the role, regardless of race. And when that happens the backlash is swift. Because white people think only white people can be ethereal beauties (elves) they think only white people can be seductive, smoking hot sorceresses, they think only white people pilot space ships in the future and kiss heroic leading men.

It happened with Rings of Power, in Wheel of Time, in Star Wars, and more! Legions of racists and misogynists organize and make life a living hell for everyone else. They do not want to share their toys.

Yes, there is room for critique and dislike of these properties without being racist. I'm not talking about people who have real critique. (I have critique! I'm a mouthy, wordy bitch!) I'm talking about people who complain about 'woke' properties and who spew racial epithets at these beautiful talented actresses.

HCav never once that I saw stood up for the diverse casting of his female costars (Please prove me wrong and send me some interview where he did) and he could have. Again, I'm not demonizing him. He is focused and ambitious and stays in his lane and looks out for his career. But he does not go the extra mile for them. And he sure as shit doesn't need one more person (me) deifying him, trying to suck him off, and in the other breath, throwing all these women and poc under the bus for him.

Look, for example, the difference with other properties. Like The Walking Dead. Andrew Lincoln literally never shuts up about how much he loves Danai being his 'leading lady'. And look at how Ewan McGregor took up for Moses Ingram. (not his leading lady, but his colleague) Just saying. It is possible. So.

This recast is weird.

It sucks.

But.

It's no one's fault.

It just is.

And we move on.

I got Joey Batey out of this. I got The Amazing Devil out of this. I got Madeleine Hyland out of this. I got the witcher book saga out of this. (I had only vaguely heard the names here and there but would have never read them otherwise) I got an amazing fandom community out of this that I will continue to write for and be a part of.

And I am not going to start screaming at working people in the streets for something they had little to no control over.

And lastly, "but you said Lauren has control over it, and surely she does get paid a ton of money. So surely this rich white lady isn't blameless in this. Surely she deserve the criticism she gets."

My guess is they are both grown ass adults who are fallible and are equally to blame. It doesn't help infantilizing or deifying him. And I can critique her work without vilifying her.

I can go write the Milva post I've been drafting for months being absolutely livid about her tweet saying Milva "embodies unrequited romance" without harrassing her. Please look at the difference here. IT IS ABOUT THE WORK. IT IS ABOUT THE STORY.

It is never personal. I would never make it personal. It's just different visions about fiction. And I would never pretend to know what happens in real life with real people behind the scenes.

And I know that no one who follows me on here is the kind of person who would harass her. At least I hope. I'm almost positive. So I'm not accusing anyone of anything. And if you hate the writing and the direction of the show you are entitled to that. I have done my own critical posts.

But again, I do not know what happened behind the scenes. So I'm staying in my lane. I've lived long enough now to see people get blamed and harassed for things and then we get documentaries twenty years later showing that people were totally in the wrong and just didn't know what happened behind the scenes.

So I will not be doing that.

And I will keep supporting Joey and Anya and Myanna and Mimi and all the people acting their little hearts out on the show. And I will keep talking about the books and writing my lil fics.

And when the show is over, I will probably follow Joey to whatever other projects he goes to. But I won't ever stop being a witcher fan or a TAD fan. That's a 'for life' thing at this point.

#talking twn #twn

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safety-writes-noms · 2 months

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Midnight Snack

Yay! We reached 200 followers so im just gonna put out a little short story for you guys as a thank you :D

This story has vore in it! It’s all sfw and nonsexual!!!! If you don’t like that, then just ignore this and click away.

Summary; Miguel hasn’t been taking care of himself lately so you decide to make sure he doesn’t keel over and die from exhaustion.

—

Now, you knew beforehand that Miguel is a man dedicated to his job, but this is unreasonable.

“A week?” He avoids your probing gaze expertly as you frown at him from his desk. “That’s how long you haven’t slept? Do you know how bad that is??”

”I’m busy. I can’t sleep.” He responds with a little shrug, as if it isn’t that big of a deal. As if his skin isn’t worryingly pale and the shadows under his eyes stretch deep. If it weren’t for the fact that you had forced him to eat on a fixed schedule, you assume he would’ve also skipped breakfast, lunch and dinner regularly. While his determination is admirable, it’s seriously worrying to see him in this disheveled state.

His hair is all mussed up and his eyes are blank, staring uncomprehendingly at the bright monitors covering the entirety of his desk. You scowl, crossing your arms as he steadily ignores you.

”Miguel! Come on, big guy, look at me,” You tap one of his hands and he tears his eyes away from the holographic report to stare at you. “This can’t be healthy. You gotta take a break, man.”

His brows furrow.

“I can’t. I have to — I have to make sure everything’s fine. Everyone.” He shakes his head stubbornly and you can’t help but huff. He’s pausing, blinking slowly and dragging his eyes back open laboriously as he struggles to function normally, much less hold up a conversation. He’s probably only staying awake through sheer will and spite.

“You can do that after you’ve gotten a good rest, Miguel. You’re gonna end up collapsing or something.” If you could, you’d grab him by the shoulders and shake him. Maybe that’d get some sense into him. Unfortunately, since you’re about the size of his pinky, you settle for pushing at his hand.

He barely pays you any mind, though he seems pretty out of it in general. He’s not listening. He’ll run himself to the ground, and while it’s not your job to care for him, you’re going to anyway since that’s what a good friend does. Plus it would kinda suck if the leader of the Spider Society died from sleep deprivation.

“Lyla. Turn the computer screens off, but leave the lights dimmed at 20%,” You call and the glowing hologram flickers to life next to you.

“Aye aye, Captain,” She salutes cheerfully and the bright orange interfaces go dark. Lyla promptly glances at Miguel and grimaces. “Oh. Aren’t you a sight for sore eyes, boss?”

Miguel musters up a vague frown, bracing himself heavily against the metal of his desk.

“Hey! I needed those. Turn them back on.” He bristles but the words are lukewarm. He has to be completely exhausted because he barely even fights back. Lyla clicks her tongue disapprovingly.

”Nuh uh, I don’t think so.” She wags a finger at him. He bares fangs, though he looks resigned. That’s a pretty good sign. Means he’s pretty close to giving up.

”I made you.”

”Actually, Xina did.”

“Lyla — “

You clear your throat as loudly as you can and Miguel turns to look at you, irritated.

“This is your fault,” He mutters sullenly, perfectly audible to your ears. Unrepentant, you grab at one of his fingers again and tug until he grudgingly flips his hand, showing his palm. You hop in easily, keeping steady as he carefully brings you up to his face so you can feel the full extent of his watery scowl. ”Are you happy with yourself?”

“I’ll be happy when you decide to go to sleep.” You bite back and he sighs loudly.

“If I sleep for a couple of hours, will you get off my case?” He asks exhaustively and you nod your head grudgingly after a moment of contemplation. A couple of hours isn’t the best but you’ll negotiate with him later.

Lyla claps her hands together happily.

“Yay! This is great,” She turns to you and glitches up to you, holding her hand out. You take it and the two of you shake in mutual respect. Miguel just watches with a defeated sort of air. For a man who’s usually so stiff and stern, it’s only at the dead of night that he lets himself crumble. You find it somewhat touching that he trusts you enough to show his flaws, even though he pushes against your care most of the time.

“You’ll both be the death of me,” He groans and Lyla sticks her tongue out at him.

“I’m actually trying to keep you alive, thanks,” She snarks back before vanishing in a dizzying whirl of golden sparks. Her disembodied voice echoes from the ceiling. “Also, you’re locked out of the computer system for the rest of the night — unless it’s an emergency that needs your assistance. Have a good night, boss!”

Miguel’s head snaps up at her last words before he just sits down heavily in his creaky swivel chair. His head comes down with a loud thunk, the hand with you in it still held aloft. You wince. That couldn’t have felt good.

You hop off easily, absorbing the impact with a roll as you poke at his cheek.

“This is no place to take a nap,” You scold. “Think of the back pain you’ll feel when you wake up tomorrow.”

He makes a muffled noise of annoyance, but pulls himself up regardless. Miguel sets his hand down in front of you again, which you clamber into quickly. He raises it up to his shoulder, and you take residence there as he begins walking over to the cushy couch shoved in the corner of his rather massive office. The kids had smuggled it in somehow and it just never left. Now, it’s main purpose is for movie nights and the occasional nap or two.

He slowly lugs his body onto the cushions with a quiet grunt, making sure that you don’t get knocked off with the motion. Even when he’s half asleep and tired out of his mind, he’s still unimaginably careful while handling you. While it’s appreciated now, it can be a bit stifling when out on the field. You just happen to come from a universe smaller than his, you’re not made of glass.

”Two hours. Then I’m going back to work.” He says, phasing away his suit to reveal rumpled but soft looking clothes underneath. It’s some sort of futuristic fashion with a high open collar and unimaginably soft fabric.

“A whole night.”

”Three hours.”

”A whole entire night.” You insist stubbornly and he blinks.

”… Five hours.”

“Miguel.”

He huffs, aiming a glare at you with little to no heat.

“I can’t take that long of a break. I have things to fix and repair. And missions to coordinate.”

You raise an unamused eyebrow.

“The other spiders can take care of that, Miguel. You have hundreds of incredibly smart people who are willing and eager to help. And Lyla can do that last one. She’s connected to everything.” Miguel still looks hesitant so you decide to sweeten the deal and play your trump card. “Look. I’m tired too, y’know? If you agree to sleep until morning, I’ll let you eat me.”

He’s silent for the count of five before he shifts slightly.

“Right now?” He raises a brow at you and you nod.

“Yup. I don’t really mind it, y’know. I think it’s comfy.” Miguel looks faintly confused but seems to be considering his choices.

“… Fine. A whole night’s sleep.” He finally settles on, and you slip down from his shoulder to his chest, squinting through the darkness you know he can see clearly through. Miguel hesitates for a moment before gently grabbing you from between his thumb and forefinger, lifting you up to his head.

You dangle from his hold, blinking as he apparently works things out in his head, sharp eyes examining you carefully despite the fact that he has gulped you down before with relative ease.

“Alright. The watch will make sure you’re fine. Just call me or send me an alert through it and I’ll get you out. Got it?” He asks and you nod eagerly.

He opens his maw wide and though you can’t really see in the dim light, you can see the yawning abyss of darkness in front of you, highlighted by sharp white teeth and fangs. His breath whooshes over you, making shivers wrack through your body despite the relative warmth of it. You reach up and tap one of the fingers holding you up, signaling that you’re ready and he makes a quiet hum of acknowledgement.

Miguel inhales slowly and slowly lowers you into his mouth. The first sensation you get is wet. Saliva soaks into your suit and you slip a little, bracing a hand against the slippery soft flesh of his tongue. The second is temperature. Everything is moving around you, so wonderfully alive and warm. His tongue curves underneath you, the powerful muscle shifting so it can wrap around you loosely like an oversized blanket.

His mouth shuts with a quiet click of teeth and all of the faint light from outside is cut off, leaving you within the darkness of Miguel’s body. You go slack and still, letting him absentmindedly taste you, push you from one cheek to the other subconsciously.

You feel him soak you in spit, not protesting or fighting back as he readies you for the journey below. Miguel is still gentle, careful. Nothing is too rough or hurts at all, even when his tongue tentatively presses you up against the hard palate of the roof of his mouth. After a long moment, he tilts his head back, just barely.

You slide toward his throat, squeezing down the tight fleshy tube accompanied by a couple of large gulps to help get you down entirely. The sound of his swallows is loud and for a moment it’s all you hear as you’re moved down. It’s not a bad pressure and you’re mostly used to it as you slip down from his esophagus and into his belly.

And man, it’s so much warmer here and also so much more comfortable. The soft flesh here contracts slightly around your body as you find a comfortable position to lie in, tucking yourself against a wall with a yawn. You press a hand against the mass of warmth and squishiness under your fingers, blinking when it ripples across the entire expanse of his stomach.

It’s quiet for a moment before Miguel clears his throat, his voice oddly loud and muffled at the same time.

”You okay? Need me to get you out?” He asks, and you make a lazy hum in response.

“No, I’m fine, man,” You sink deeper into the comforting warmth and you hear something like a quiet chuckle from above. It’s good to hear him sound relaxed for once. God knows he needs some relaxation anyway.

“Okay,” he sounds tired and everything is still before your surroundings shift and you tumble somewhat quickly into the side wall of his stomach. He must’ve turned over on his side. ”… Thank you. You care too much about me.”

You frown, picking up on his meaning quickly.

”Well yeah, you’re my friend. Besides, if I was working myself to death, you would’ve done the same, right?” You say and he huffs, laying a palm over his stomach. You can feel it in the way the slimy-squishy walls indent around you.

“It’s not the same.”

”How so?”

”It just isn’t.” Miguel says firmly and you roll your eyes.

”Agree to disagree. Also, go to sleep! I have no idea how you’ve stayed awake this long. We’ll talk about that tomorrow.” You promise, pressing your hand against the closest “wall”. He makes a quiet noise, but it’s quickly drowned out by the familiar sound of rumbling vibrating through his entire body. The volume of his contented purrs are quiet enough that a person outside would have to strain their ears to hear it.

From where you are right now, the comforting noise is steady and somewhat loud. It’s not overwhelming though — it just blends into the other sounds of his stomach growling and his other organs working somewhere else in his body. You stretch and settle down with a quiet yawn.

Then everything shifts around you, contracting and moving to cradle you securely in complete warmth and comfort.

“Goodnight.” Miguel’s low voice echoes from above and you close your eyes.

“G’night.”

You fall asleep that way and he quickly follows, a hand settled carefully over his stomach and fully content.

#extreme cuddling #nonsexual vore #Sw writes fics #safe vore #soft vore #s: spidervores #spidervore #spidervores

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sokkastyles · 1 month

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personal opinion, I dont like how the comics made ozai and usra relationship. I always headcanon that they were in love and happy at first but slowly ozai became more greedy and abusive to his kids and kept playing mind games with them. I think Ozai does love usra but he loves power more and is willing to sacrifice anything to get it. I know everyone hates the live action, but I like it because they give ozai some dept. He's still an abusive asshole. But an abusive asshole that does have love for his family. Or did. But he cares more about power. And is willing to do anything to get it. I feel like with abusive parents they always make it seem all black and white and stuff when its not.

I didn't hate the live action and I do think they were attempting to give Ozai more depth, but I think they weren't successful in this, partially because I think there's a misconception about what "depth" means, especially when it comes to morally black and gray characters.

Original Ozai does have depth. It is hinted that he loved Ursa, and I think that he would say that he loves his children. Even when Zuko confronts him with what he did to him, he doesn't just laugh evilly, he justifies himself, and looks outraged by Zuko's accusation that what he did was cruel and wrong.

My problem with the attempts to give Ozai, and Azula to an extent, more "depth" in the live action is that they seem to mistake depth for sympathy, and it's not the same thing. The show kind of attempts to "explain" Ozai in a way that actually flattens the character, in my view, and misunderstands how abuse and abusive people work. Ozai isn't playing mind games with his children because he's looking for a "strong" heir (although he may tell himself that.) He's doing it because of his own insecurity and deep need to feed that insecurity. It's all about him.

I think he loved Ursa because she belonged to him, and loved that his children also belonged to him. I think he started to resent Ursa after she had children, actually, at the same time that his view of ownership strengthened. Because having his children both affirms that she is his and, simultaneously, means that he has to share her with the children, who demand so much of her time. I think this is at the heart of his resentment for Zuko (Ursa's firstborn and a boy, who Ozai sees himself and his own weak need in) and his to mold Azula in his image and distance herself from her mother (because he won't make the same mistake he did when Zuko was born, and because Azula is a mini version of her mother that Ozai can mold in the way he can't an adult Ursa.)

This is pretty psychologically complex stuff, which I feel adds more depth to a character than attempts to rationalize their actions, which often fall flat, particularly since Ozai's behavior should not be rationalized. I don't love the explanation the comics give of Ozai and Ursa's relationship, but I'm not a fan of the idea that they were in love, either, especially with the implication that Ozai might have once been a good husband, because like, there are people like this in the real world who never once had good intentions. There are people who get into relationships like this all the time. I believe Ozai would have been capable of charming Ursa once, but does that mean that the relationship was ever good, or does it just mean that Ozai is a good manipulator?

I actually think that the situation was probably similar to what we see Zuko (and Azula) slowly come to realize in the show: that the relationship was never good, but Ozai was good at convincing his family that it was good or at least, that he knew what was best for them.

I mean, Ozai was able to convince Ursa that the only way out of her situation was to commit murder, an act that would brand her as a traitor, put her out of her children's lives forever, and give Ozai everything he wanted. She was being manipulated in much the same way that Zuko was manipulated - banished and made to think it was her fault, made to be complicit in Ozai's crimes.

That tells me more about their relationship and about Ozai as a person than the comics or the live action do with, as I said before, much less exposition.

#ozai #ursa #atla live action #zuko #azula

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twisted-wonderland-shenanigans · 1 year

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Loving the Kaiju AU and I have a few questions

How would yuu react to the other staffs being like a father/uncle/grandfather/brother to yuu? how would the other boys see yuu as? Will any of the staff and boys would try and communicate with yuu?

Well, for the most part, Yuu’s reactions are up to you guys since it’s meant to represent us/our charactesr as the MC just like the game. I try to keep it as open to creative freedom to inspire you guys since everyone reacts differently. >v<;

Anyway, I did discuss the Kaiju trying to communicate with Yuu in this post here, where we also learn that Grim can, in fact, understand human languages! (Yes, languages, not just English or Japanese) Despite the language barrier, Yuu will manage to learn how to replicate the sounds and frequencies they hear…including certain ones that should be impossible for normal human vocal chords. Hmmm… >.>

But! We’ll cross that bridge sooner or later. In the meantime, more “Help! I’m trapped on an island with no memories and I’ve been adopted by two Kaiju dads!!” for all of us~! >vÓ

So we know that Yuu (as would anyone in their position) was baffled and floored at the realization that Nevermore and Crewelfang adopted them, let alone the fact that the two were…gentle towards them. It was sweet…in a terrifying giant monster sort of way, and tat the moment it was their saving grace against the other creatures of the island.

And then came the rest of the “family”.

Once the rest of the staff came into the picture, Yuu and Grimfang were safely hidden behind Nevermore’s forepaws as the others investigated the duo with curious eyes. It doesn’t take long for Yuu to figure out that they’d been accepted by this group of powerful monsters that—according to MIRA—not even the researchers had been able to observe to such an extent. In a way it’s kinda nice having the extra security of their extended “family”.

Some took their new familial role as “surrogate uncle” a little too enthusiastically though. ^_^;

///

Crewel: *trying to groom Yuu* “How in the world did you get yourself so filthy walking outside the den? Hold still, pup!”

Yuu: *glaring at Grim, who bumped them into a muddy water puddle* [“Traitor!”]

Grim: “Hey, it’s not my fault you don’t know how to groom yourself.”

Crewel: “Don’t think you’re getting out of a grooming session. Your fur is a mess!”

Grim: “What?! No fair! I can keep myself cleaner than the human!”

WHUD!!!

Vargas: “Good morning!” *standing on top of a massive whale-like creature* “I’ve brought the nibblings breakfast, freshly hunted from the sea!”

Crewel: *long-suffering sigh* “Ashton…two things. One: get that thing out of my den before it starts to reek! And two: surely you don’t expect the pups to eat that whole thing in one sitting?”

Vargas: “They’re both skin and bones. If they’re going to survive in this pack, they need to build up their muscles!” *begins shredding the carcass into chunks with shark teeth* “Once they’ve finished this, they’ll need to eat eggs to help them grow big and strong—like me!”

Crewel: “That is far too much for either of them to eat!”

Yuu: *hiding behind Crewel’s paws* [“What is happening?!”]

Crowley: *outside* “Why is there a fish blocking the entrace?!”

//-------//

Yuu: *trying to follow MIRA’s instructions to build a makeshift survival “bed” out of leaves and sticks* [“I’m pretty sure this isn’t going to be very comfortable…”]

Grim: “So why are you wasting your time?”

Yuu: [“Ugh…what I wouldn’t give for a mattress. Even a sleeping bag would be an upgrade!”] *continues trying to tie the twine…before stopping with a shudder* [“…what was that…?”]

Grim: “What was what?”

Yuu: *whirls around, gasping in horror* [“AAAAA-!!”]

Grim: *turns and sees massive spider-like chameleon emerging from the trunk of a tree* “FYGAAAAAAAA-!!!!”

Crowley: “What is going on out there?!”

Sam: *fully materializes just as Crewel and Crowley come charging out* “Hello, little imps~! So sorry for scaring you both.”

Crewel: “Sam? For Seven’s sake, we thought the pups were in danger!”

Sam: “My apologies! I brought gifts for your new litter of imps—in stock! And I guarantee there will be something they’ll want in there."

Yuu: *notices something odd about Sam and squints* [“…is…that Kaiju wearing a satchel?”] *yelps as Sam dumps the contents of the satchel onto the ground, the pile towering over them* [“Wha-?!...whoa! Whoa!! Look at all this!”]

Crowley: *tilts head in confusion as Yuu starts digging around the pile, Grim joining shortly after out of curiosity* “Well, they certainly seem interested in your selection. Now, say that they do find something. What do you want in exchange?”

Sam: “Just a simple trade this time, since most of the stock is unusable to us. A few mango seeds and a crystal from your mountain nest will suffice!”

Crowley: “Deal! Such a generous offer~!”

Yuu: *has already found a satchel and a several duffle bags, filling it with small items, towels, and blankets* [“Wow. How did he even get a full shower caddy with soap and shampoo?! Score! Now I can take a proper bath!”]

Grim: *grabs and drags out a large mattress* “The heck is this?”

Yuu: *gasp!!!* [“BED!!!!”] *dives off the pile onto the mattress before bouncing off, climbing back on and sprawling out with a grin and giggling happily* [“Oh, I’m going to sleep well tonight!”]

Crewel: “They seem quite taken with that slab in particular.”

Grim: “Huh…hey, move over, I wanna try it too!”

Yuu: [“Wha-? Hey! No! Get off! You’re gonna squish it!”]

Grim: “I’m not gonna squish it! Quit hoggin’ the good stuff!” *lightly pins Yuu down under his arm*

Yuu: *squirming to get out from under him* [“Move your big butt! Nevermore!”]

Crowley: “Play nice, you two!”

Crewel: “Don’t make me put you two on the discipline branch again!”

(In the end, the two wound up sharing the mattress with Yuu occasionally sleeping on Grim’s back or belly. When he wants to be mischievous, he’ll flip the mattress over while Yuu is on it)

//--------//

Crowley: “…perhaps it was unwise for Grim and Lucius to meet…”

Lucius: “Rrreaaaarrrl!!”

Grim: “Shut up! Yer the one who stole my snack!”

Lucius: “Hissss!”

Grim: “Why you-!”

Trein: “Enough!”

Grim: “But he started it!”

Crewel: “Down boy!”

Crowley: “Are you sure you can handle them both, Mozus?”

Trein: “You forget that this is not my first time raising hatchlings or kits. They will be fine while you two patrol the island.”

Crewel: “I’ll hold you to that.”

Yuu: [“Wait, where are you guys going?”]

Crowley: “Be a good hatchling for Mozus while we’re gone. We will return at noon.”

-Several hours later-

Crowley: “We’re ba—oh.”

Trein: *the air is filled with flickering images of creatures and scenes, scales shimmering while a gentle thrum radiating from Trein’s chest as he continues telling a story to an enthralled Yuu and Grim*

Yuu: *can’t understand what Trein is saying but enchanted by the illusions as they try to piece together what the story is about*

Crewel: “Hmph…so you do still have a few tricks up your sleeve for an old dog. Well done.”

//---------//

I think it’s safe to say that Yuu has had a lot of interesting encounters with their new adoptive family members. XD But how would they feel in the end after everything is said and done?

///------------///

After everything that had transpired throughout the last few days, it was no surprise that Yuu was exhausted. Despite this, however, they found themselves lying wide awake. Wrapped in one of their new blankets with their back pressed to Grimfang’s side as they both shared the mattress, it was like they had their own portable radiator…that snores. And like a massive pair of organic walls that blocked the chill of the night, Nevermore and Crewelfang encircled the two with their heads resting on each other’s haunches. The den was filled with quiet breathing, the wind howling outside sounding muffled.

In the silence, Yuu’s thoughts swirled: ‘Who am I?’ This was a question that had been plaguing them since they were first grounded to the nest with nothing to do but think. They could remember things like what objects or fruit were called and how they functioned, or how to work with things like a computer. And yet the more they tried to remember their life before the beach, the harder it became to recall even the most basic information.

Name? Age? Easy. School? Nothing. Job skills? No clue. Friends? Family? Pets?

Complete blanks.

All they could recall was a vague feeling of warmth and comfort, that someone out there cared for them. Who, they couldn’t say for sure…and the thought terrified them more than they thought. Would…they ever remember what their life was like? Who they were as a person?...

Yuu blinked as a rippling wave of shimmering gold light crossed their vision—no, their mind—before a small drop of emerald joined in, followed by a feeling of warmth and worry not their own bloomed in their chest. Raising their head from the mattress, Yuu was met with Nevermore’s golden gaze as he watched them—a sight they’d grown accustomed to after the first night’s scare he’d had.

What had MIRA called that color phenomenon before? ‘Echoing resonance’? They’d thought it had been part of the dream the first night it happened, but ever since they’d been experiencing it from both Nevermore and Crewelfang. [“It is unique to Kaiju in that they may direct the frequency to a group or a singular individual. Researchers believe this to be an evolutionary trait designed to communicate between young offspring and other pack members akin to echolocation. Study has shown that humans may experience this from Kaiju test subjects, though no further information can be gleaned due to the rarity of the phenomenon,”] the computer had told them.

…pack members and offspring…

“…I don’t understand you at all,” Yuu told him, his ear twitching as he tilted his head in response. “I mean…you’re not even human, and yet you decided to ‘adopt’ me because of that stupid serum. Do you even know what I am? Or do you just not care?” That last part sounded more frustrated than they’d intended, but Nevermore’s expression seemed…softer than before now, colorful ripples of blue and violet filling their mind as a wave of calm washed over them. “…then again…I don’t know where I’d be if you hadn’t found me that day. And since I can’t even remember them…you’re the closest thing to a family I have now.”

Nevermore gently lowered his head to rest it next to the mattress, his eye watching them as a quiet sigh escaped.

Reaching out to pet his cheek, Yuu couldn’t help but chuckle when he began to “purr”, the sound more akin to a soft, whistling warble. “Thank you,” they whispered, their eyes heavy now as a sense of security filled them. “For everything…”

#twisted wonderland #twst #twisted wonderland kaiju au #twst kaiju au #twst dire crowley #divus crewel #ashton vargas #twst sam #mozus trein

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microscotch · 4 months

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Girllll I've been spending my holidays with rereading Nobody's Home and I just wanted to ask, are Circe and Loki divorced? If so, what made you divorce them?

YUP the story is set post psp, and part of my backstory for the beakers is them getting a divorce!

so when looking at their relationship i tried to take everything into consideration that the pc and psp game gave to us. let me put a below the cut though so not everyone has to be witness to me inflicting the makings of chronic joint pain on myself:

we know poor nervous died at one point. the implications from both games about how he came to be their test subject are quite conflicting, but i went with emily and annies claims that he signed up to be their test subject for money, as it, from my perspective, tied better into explaining their current situation and provided more detail in general as opposed to maxis' sloppy memory distribution.

with their first subject, the beakers could to some extent rest on the risk a job like this entails and neatly detail it in the contract they had nervous sign to avoid charges as much as possible. in addition to that, they were able to throw a lot of money at preventing the sensationalization of it, but it did come at a cost: 1) selling the castle to make up for it and 2) circe losing her license and the hospital ceasing any affiliation with her. cut to the sad little paradise place house and circe only being hinted at doing 'business' by that time:

left with a less extensive financial repertoire, loki is eager to do whatever it may take to get his precious castle back, and, once he invented something he believed to be a future gold mine, secured some secret patents that will net him millions (quote: circe). with loki, by her assumption, not being willing to share the profits with her, it makes sense for circe to be uneasy and distrustful about this, as the two are already on less safe ground, both in regards to finances and the law, and now he wants to keep all the money he'll be making to himself? her secret about harbouring some underlying resentment for loki's independence and distinction is also pretty convenient here and can be used as an implication that she wasn't as lucky as her husband, particularly regarding him not facing repercussions the same way she did. circe, on the other hand, is having an affair. while that was a product of mind control and not her fault, neither she or loki know that. all that is being revealed to loki is his wife cheating on him. this is where they're left at. depending on the string of dialogue, loki will say that if anyone moves out, it will be his wife, cause it's his house.

after thinking about it, circe would most likely move out immediately. after all of that happening inc. circes slap interaction loop, i can't see either of them comfortable spending even one more night at the same house together. while it is revealed at the end of the game that newlow was mindcontrolling the citizens, we don't know when and how fast these news will actively be passed along, what investigations are being led, etc. - point being, the trifecta of the beakers still being in each others presence, these news reaching them by that time and drawing the correct conclusions from it is the best case scenario but, after the considerations given above, not the most likely one. especially because there's an urgent issue that would capture their attention almost immediately after the game storyline is over: gimi branko. unlike nervous where they could rely on a contract, they literally kidnapped this guy and kept him locked up against his will, and someone had to save him aka he can press charges and tell everything in great detail, with a witness to top it off. they don't have the financial resources to buy themselves out of that anymore (loki's patents aside, but as of now he hasn't seen a cent of that and sure wouldn't consider his wife given recent events), the charges are more dire AND they're at odds with each other.

so i totally had them rat each other out, both hoping to get the lower charge by placing as much blame on the other person as possible. even if gimi being gone were the very first thing they noticed after being at each other's throat, judging by the way they already talked about each other before both their suspicions turned out to be true, there's way too much mutual distrust that built up over a long period of time for them to suck it up for the occasion and not prioritizing their own asses. and thats the end of the evil couple.

#wtfaq #strangetown #loki beaker #circe beaker #nervous subject #gimi branko #nh

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qweerhet · 1 year

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I agree with you that it's ableist to interpret inability to understand social norms as predatory, but I'm bothered by "not reading people's body language that says not to touch them" as an example because surely the solution there is to not touch anyone unless they explicitly say you can if you're not 100% certain you can read their body language? As an autistic person who frequently has neurotypical people touching me when I don't want it because they don't understand my body language I think it would be good for everyone - neurotypicals included - to ask for explicit consent before touching people.

(this got long; i added bold text for attempted improved accessibility, but it's a text wall no matter how you look at it. apologies.)

mm. i understand why this seems, intellectually, like a solid solution, but i have a lot of issues with its actual implementation, and i also have some experiences that raise concerns about its efficiency in destigmatizing autistic behavior. i subscribed to this rule of thumb for a time myself, and it resulted in two things:

i became hyper, hyper vigilant about my own body and actions in a way that basically traumatized me wrt social interaction. i trained myself to view my body as a weapon, which was likely to, if i did not precautionarily restrain myself, invoke horrific trauma on anyone it touched. touch became nothing but a nuclear bomb i had to prevent from going off; if i so much as brushed a friend's skin by accident while walking by them, i viewed it as a failure, and more importantly, a failure that had the potential to horrifically traumatize them for life in a way that was entirely my fault.

it did not help me at all in interpersonal relationships, because there is a threshold past which it's considered annoying and rude to continue to ask for explicit verbal consent at every single individual action, and to some extent, even as an autistic myself, i also found it annoying, rude, and quite honestly a massive energy expenditure. seriously, if you have a partner who's willing, try it out sometime--but specifically try it out in a way that would be an accessibility tool for an autistic assuming literally 0 body language fluency. before a quick peck on the lips, ask "can i kiss you," before tapping their shoulder to get their attention ask "can i tap your shoulder," before sitting next to them on the couch ask "is it okay if my thigh touches your thigh," and make sure to do this in each individual instance no matter how often the answer is "yes" or how long you've known each other.

the latter bullet point has a tendency to be taken in bad faith--it tends to be associated with people being "purposefully obtuse," and get eye-rolls and "of course you don't need to do that, you're taking this to an extreme on purpose, just be normal!" this reaction is part of the fundamental issue i see with people's treatment of autistics in discussions around consent, body language, and sexual interactions; a significant portion of autism is not having the capacity to understand social context and integrate that understanding naturally into our relationships. many autistic people can't understand when it's time to universalize a particular interaction; if the impetus is on us, then in order to avoid violating a social more, we will have to expend that energy and take it upon ourselves to be obnoxious to literally ask consent for every individual interaction, every single time it happens, regardless of context, because that context is inaccessible to us.

ok, with all of that said: i think these two points work together to paint a depressing picture of autistic engagements with consent culture/body language. most language barriers wrt nonverbal communication do not happen in one isolated instance with a stranger; these are patterns and long-standing relationships with the people in the spaces that autistics occupy daily. this includes close relationships like family and close friendships, sure, but i'm mostly referring to spaces like weekly club meetings, mutual aid groups, the same people that show up at the gay bar every week, the people at the library every day, etc.

the depressing fact is: with these re-occurring and important social relationships, putting the onus on the autistic person to self-modulate without any leeway for miscommunication both sets the expectation that if someone is made uncomfortable, it is the autistic's fault (which i believe is where my "body as a weapon, touch as abuse" neurosis stemmed from), and also locks autistics out of fairly normal prosocial bonding behaviors because, on a larger scale, leaning into this solution makes neurotypicals just about as uncomfortable as misreading their body language and hugging them when they don't want a hug! autistics are regularly referred to as "pressuring," or just simply "creepy" and excluded from social bonding, for asking for permission "too many" times. being "standoffish" and not engaging in "normal" amounts of physical affection with friends is often considered just as creepy as engaging in "too much."

i also want to add that this sort of body language/nonverbal cue language barrier doesn't just apply to physical touch that is theoretically possible to get explicit verbal consent for in every instance. i've seen autistics called out (in the true sense of the term callout, where they are legitimately referred to as predatory) for consistently standing "too close" to others, making eye contact for an uncomfortably long period of time, looking at the wrong parts of someone's body (like "staring at my feet"),

also, i'd like to add on that some people are entirely nonverbal and only communicate via body language/nonverbal cues; any one-size-fits-all consent culture/communication norm is going to harm some group of people who can't communicate in that way, and the new norm becoming "solely verbal communication of boundaries is acceptable, and any touch that is not requested verbally is assault" is going to have harmful splashback on those who solely communicate nonverbally.

i think that a greater cultural focus on both setting explicit boundaries and accepting boundaries is the best we're going to get in terms of navigating consent in ways that are disability-accessible; i also think that more education on varying communication styles and anti-ableist community work is the best we're going to get in terms of cutting down on the amount of active language barriers. i think that plenty of allistics can be taught to use verbal communication a bit more than they do--the fact that allistic culture is the dominant violently-enforced hegemony indicates to me that there is probably more space for allistics to learn to "speak" autism-adjacent communication than there is for autistics to learn allistic communication. i also think that greater forgiveness and leeway once a language barrier is recognized is the thing i'm advocating the most for here; if you recognize that someone is not understanding your nonverbal language, for example, a societal pressure to acknowledge this and go your separate ways would be a massive improvement over the current pressure to view this as inherently a predatory action.

in order to get there, though, i think we have to openly and vocally address the culture that we are currently in, where language barriers wrt body language/nonverbal cues get responded to with incredible social and even physical violence, even (and sometimes particularly) in leftist and nominally anti-ableist spaces. i have repeatedly seen autistics socially ostracized, cut off from vital material support, and even physically attacked, for failing to recognize a nonverbal cue, failing to understand and integrate social context into an interaction, and numerous other cases of failing to "speak allistic." i have, in fact, repeatedly seen this happen in neurodiverse spaces, including with the aggression coming from other autistics who have higher social competence. part of what has prompted me to start talking about this in the first place, tbh, is the proliferation of autistics on social media who have moderately-to-very high social competence and project their capabilities onto all autistics, even rejecting the idea that there are autistic profiles that include the very things they're decrying as universally "creepy" or "red flags," and who have hijacked the autistic narrative in leftist spaces to a massive degree.

anyway: thank you for your ask, and i'm happy to have the chance to talk about my thoughts on this topic on a less defensive and more "generally here's some things i'm mulling over" level.

i don't have a good call to action or a way to end this post neatly, but i'm very happy to have this discussion, particularly out in the open where it can be engaged in by The Public, and would highly appreciate more autistic engagement on this topic, particularly from other low-social-competency and 0-nonverbal-fluency autistics (who i've been fairly isolated from irl, sadly, and rarely run across a fellow one on social media due to how much our voices are buried).

#i WILL turn reblogs and replies off on this post the moment someone decides to be a clown #i swear to fucking g-d engage in good faith. please. i beg you.#anonymous #ask #long post #VERY long post

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ashe-studies · 3 months

Text

[ s**cide warning ] - a big problem i have with sonic prime s3 ( amongst several other ones i have ).

i've talked about this at length ( more or less ) with a friend of mine and this bothered both of us, so i wanted to see if anyone else had this issue.

according to one scene in s3, Sonic is canonically suicidal. not self-sacrificial ( which can mean the same thing, but often doesn't ), but suicidal.

for comparisons sake, let's talk about Leonardo from ROTTMNT, who was the example of self-sacrificial.

Leonardo and Sonic are in a similar boat. they made a mistake ( though, i firmly believe Sonic's was less of a mistake and more of an unfortunate circumstance ), and they try to fix it throughout the story.

while i'm not going to debate Sonic's characterization here ( cuz i think it's utter dogshit and is for an entirely different post ), i will talk about the mindsets that make these two different.

Leonardo didn't want to die here. he was fine with doing so, but only because he believed that would keep his family safe. if he did want to die, we wouldn't see Leo put so much thought into his actions.

we see that he isn't looking for the opportunity to die. throughout the entire movie, he's self-destructive because he knows that, at least to some extent, the plan going wrong was his fault. he knows ( or believes, depending on how you view the movie ) that Raph sacrificing himself only happened because Leo didn't listen.

so, Leonardo isn't suicidal, but self-sacrificial. because he just wants his family back.

now, let's move back to Sonic.

( this is not the scene where he's suicidal, obviously )

when Sonic goes to confront Nine on his own, Nine says at some point:

"you want to save everyone. friends, foes, total strangers. you say it's because you're a hero and that's what heroes do, but deep down... after what you did, destroying your own home, it's the only way you can ever live with yourself. even if that means you won't live at all."

this is Sonic's self-destructive behavior.

rather than focusing on one goal, Sonic focuses on all of them ( to varying degrees, cuz the writer's don't know what they're doing ) at expense of his own. yes, he wants Green Hill to come back, but it's more of for his friends ( Shadow included ) than for himself.

at first, he misses Green Hill. he really wants to go home. but by s3, it's more or less him just wanting Green Hill to exist again. it's like he no longer cares if he's in the picture.

and considering how Sonic was the key to everything ( due to his Prism energy ), he'd have to become a sacrifice at some point, but this confrontation is different.

for one thing, Sonic is alone.

he tries to push his friends away before talking to Nine.

he doesn't deny that he can't live with himself if he doesn't try to save everyone.

the only reason Sonic stopped was because his friends intervened.

of course, Sonic might not show all the symptoms of a suicidal person ( unless ofc, you're looking into this as deep as i am ), but that's not because he's no longer suicidal. that's not how it works. it's because right after the intervention, it's never brought up again. it's just bad writing and it's disrespectful.

but as i see Sonic as someone who's suicidal, according to the suicide prevention resource center, the symptoms are:

feeling unbearable pain

Nine's comment on how it's the "only way he can live with himself" can be seen as Sonic feeling unbearable pain from his own guilt. this can also be related to Sonic in s2 when he's in Ghost Hill for the first time.

Sonic has been going left and right trying to help everyone else in their respective Gateways that his progress on returning home slowed. especially since he didn't know Green Hill didn't have its own Gateway, but instead was destroyed.

death, or a recent fascination with death.

his sacrifice could be seen as such. especially since this was after what Nine said.

feeling hopeless, worthless, or trapped.

throughout s3, Sonic repeatedly has doubt or hopeless about himself or the situations around him. of course, the moments are fleeting, but the amount of times he does this could lead to something a suidical person would say or do.

feeling guilt, shame, or anger.

aside from his guilt, Sonic has expressed shame ( it doesn't help Shadow kept beating it into him that it was his fault every 2 seconds ) in s2-s3, and anger was prominent within s3. it was towards Nine, mostly, but it felt almost unnatural or uncharacteristic anger.

feeling like a burden to others.

Sonic had tried to isolate himself from everyone else more than once, emotionally or physically, and only stopped once his friends made it clear they weren't leaving.

changes in behavior or mood that are relevant to Sonic specifically:

recent attempt ( again, sacrifice )

withdrawing from family, friends, or community ( his repeated attempts to do things alone // isolating himself due to his guilt )

losing interest in personal appearance or hygiene ( more or less out of Sonic's control, but we've only seen him take even a little bit care of himself when he was on Dread's ship )

a recent episode of depression, emotional distress, and // or anxiety ( repeated emotional distress, having to be pulled out of the cave, shaking or fidgeting hands, etc. )

changes in eating // sleeping patterns ( again, not totally within his control, but it would affect one's mental state regardless )

becoming violent or being a victim of violence ( ...*COUGHS* sha- *COUGHS* ni- *COUGHS* )

expressing rage ( Sonic's borderline threats about Nine )

recklessness ( ... )

again, because this is never brought up after, i wouldn't be surprised if people didn't think too much into this scene beyond "oh, Nine's evil and mean".

purely from a writer's perspective, i don't think Sonic Prime is a good show. it's what i consider a "junk food show". something to laugh at for its quality. but i don't consider it a good show.

so, i'm not surprised that Sonic's suicidal behavior or the talk about Sonic's mindset isn't brought up again, but it is still disappointing and offensive to those who struggled or continue to struggle with suicidal ideation or acts.

this is probably the only official Sonic media that has a suicidal Sonic, and they don't even treat it with respect. because of course they don't. what does it matter? Sonic's a dumb little guy anyway!

anyway, this is just my long way of saying that i see Sonic as a suicidal hero, not a self-sacrificial one ( or not only a self-sacrificial one ), and why Sonic Prime pisses me off for this reason.

it's fine to have a suicidal hero character. it brings a lot of things up for discussion.

but it's not okay to use it as a way to make your audience sad for a few minutes, then pull the rug from beneath them.

#sonic prime #sonic prime season 3 #sonic prime s3 #sonic prime spoilers #prime sonic #prime shadow #tails nine #sonic prime analysis #i guess

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tealeafgrimm · 2 years

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hii! if requests are still open, could i get a percy weasley and reader fic where shes a slytherin and theyre late to class bcs they were busy ;);) and they show up with each others tie?? she turns up to class in a hurry and mcgonagall is like "miss Y/L/N, the last time i saw the slytherin tie is green" and percy shows up behind her wearing a slytherin tie and minervas like "both of you,my office after class" but shes smirking and everyone else is like yOo and teases them??? Thanks!!

Thank you so much for the request. This was a fun little one shot to write, I hope you like it !

Wrong Tie

Percy Weasley x Slytherin!Reader

Words: 688

Summary: After a heated make-out session, you and Percy are late for class. You try your best to limit the damage. In vain.

The corridors were empty and extraordinarily quiet. Or maybe it just seemed so quiet because both yours and Percy's footsteps echoed off the stone walls like roaring thunder.

Completely out of breath and trying to block out your side stitches, you turned the next corner frantically. With a quick glance behind you, you made sure your boyfriend was following.

"Come on Percy! Every second longer only makes it worse!" you shouted behind you.

"I'm running as fast as I can! In case you haven't noticed, I'm not the most athletic of my brothers and besides, I'm still trying to fix this damn tie," came the gasping reply.

"Just leave the tie off!" "I'm a prefect, I can't just walk around like I'm..."

"You certainly shouldn't be late for class either! I had said the bell rang!"

Your steps slowed as you arrived at the final staircase. For a second you stopped and tried to control your breathing before you started up the stairs, taking two steps at a time.

"Yes yes, I know it's my fault we're both late. But I can't remember you complaining or making any moves to leave at all costs."

At last, you saw the classroom door. In a last attempt to look presentable, you tucked your school uniform skirt into place and tried in vain to straighten your blouse. Next to you, Percy tried to straighten his hair to some extent, but was equally unsuccessful.

“Ready?”, you whispered to the boy next to you. He nodded and you could tell he mentally already tried to think of some excuse to come up with, as to why the two of you were late.

Of course, the door had to squeak loudly when you opened it, so that even the last of your classmates noticed that someone was late. All faces were turned towards you. Some looked curious, others bored and still others had difficulty suppressing a laugh. You knew you and Percy must look like plucked chickens.

"Nice of the both of you to grace us with your presence," Professor McGonagall's voice rang out from the front of the class. Of all things, you had to be late to her class. Why couldn't it be Professor Flitwick or Sprout, they were much more relaxed about tardiness.

Before you could even think, the words spilled out of you. Percy next to you, however, did exactly the same, so that your words overlapped and not a single sentence could be properly understood.

"We're really sorry..." "You know we would never intentionally..." "...stopped and..." "... as quickly as possible..." "...disappointed in us..." "...really understand, but..."

You didn't really know yourself what you or Percy were actually getting at, but somehow you both finished your rushed apology almost simultaneously.

Out of the corner of your eye, you could see Oliver Wood turn to one of your best friends and whisper something to her, at which she couldn't help giggling.

"I'm not interested in your excuses Miss Y/L/N, Mister Weasley. I want to see you both in my office after class and now sit down, you've held us up enough already."

"Yes Professor," you and Percy both murmured meekly before heading to your respective seats in the classroom.

You could have sworn you saw the hint of a grin on Professor McGonagall's face when she turned back to the blackboard. And a second later, you knew why.

"And it seems like you may have forgotten, but only the Slytherins wear green Mister Weasley." Shocked, you looked over at Percy, only to see your green tie fastened around his neck. A second glance in your bag confirmed that you had packed his.

Percy's face resembled a tomato's and you could feel the blush creeping up your face as well. Your classmates couldn't help laughing now and with your head down you dropped down next to your best friend.

"I swear one word from you and I'll kill you!" you hissed at her. With her hands up, she turned back to her lessons, but you could be sure that she would tease you about this situation for at least a week.

#percy weasley x y/n #percy weasley x you #percy weasley x reader #percy weasley #reader insert #one shot #harry potter #requested #harry potter oneshot #harry potter series #harry potter fanfiction

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endlessame · 3 months

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Actually, thinking more about it, the more I start to realize that... it makes sense. If we believe Kotoko with what she said about not having a sad or traumatic childhood... maybe something happened in her young adult years that made her into what she is today. I'm gonna keep pushing my agenda of regretful Kotoko, because I really, really think that even if we voted Kotoko innocent again (which I sadly doubt) she would not do the same thing again. Because we voted her innocent. We told her "hey, we approve of your ideas. Your morals are correct." And yet, look at Deep Cover. Is that the song of someone actually prideful? Not at fucking all! This is not a "It's Not My Fault". Actually, I think this is more of a "Backdraft" type song! Like. Let's analyze some parts of the lyrics which I think are. Genuinely really interesting.

At first, I think we should remember something important. The whole concept of Milgram. These are Kotoko's feelings. And I see it as a layered thing. You can stay with the obvious surface layer! Kotoko beat everyone up, she's evil. In her MV she sees herself as a guard, in control of the prison. She doesn't regret anything, we're voting her guilty.

And, you know? That is a completely fair way to see it! I just have this really personal belief about MILGRAM and forgiveness. I believe Kotoko represents the most brutal part of Milgram's whole moral system, but I'll explain that later on.

The thing with Milgram is, you can choose to stay in the upper level. And no one will judge you for that. But... also you can try to look at the motives. Look, analyze, understand… and forgive. I think what this is all about. And looking at Deep Cover, I don't see a person saying that they've got full control over the prison. I see an scared, regretful person trying to convince herself that she has even the slightest bit of control left in her situation.

Now I want to draw some attention into some lines I've seen... not a lot of people say anything about?

god she's so pretty

Who don't we want? Give me the verdicts of GUILTY. That's why I became your fangs, as the long awaited hero.

And,

So make yourselves my reason. Just choose the only choice, GUILTY. Say that sympathy is useless. Hate evil as the evil that is.

Damn, girl, ok!

Again, layered thing. We could say "Oh, this is just Kotoko telling us to vote everyone guilty because they are guilty except her...!" Do y'all really think she means that? Do you all really think she THINKS that? Because I really don't. I really believe Kotoko is pushing us to vote her guilty. She wants that. Why? Because as I said earlier, not only she's regretful, at least to some extent... but also she represents the worst parts of the Milgram ideology. Milgram tries to make us look at this prisoners as people with problems and struggles who drove them to murder. Milgram is asking us to understand, while Kotoko represents the hatred and the desire for revenge that Milgram, specially Jackalope, is trying to make us do so much. "You can vote based on whatever you want!" Yeah, we can, but that is not the right thing. If it's not clear by now, I'm a firm believer in the All-Inno theory. I believe every single prisoner should be voted innocent, and that doesn't mean that they will all end up as murderers believing that they're right. I just believe that that is what Milgram is trying to do, as in the end, this is THE Milgram experiment! We're being told to understand, reject the authoritarian voice and forgive. Maybe it's not the easy route. It is not, actually. But I believe is the correct one.

And now, I want to talk a bit about the girl. The girl who Kotoko killed to save. At first they had a good relationship, or so it seems? Kotoko took care of her, and they apparently met each other regularly? Until the thing we see at the end of the MV happened. What happened, really? Something happened between HARROW and Deep Cover.

So I translated this.

I'm not the best at japanese, but it roughly says:

The murder incident that ocurred in Minato, Tokyo, is currently shaking Japan. The victim is Ado Kaneshiro (24). The fact that he is the only son of Kenyu Kaneshiro (68), the representative of Akebono Shimbun, and that the person who comitted it was a 20 year old female college student enrolled in a famous university in Tokyo also helps the topic of conversation. At a press conference, Mr. Kaneshiro appeared in front of countless cameras with tears in his eyes and criticized the brutal behavior of the female student. The judicial decision is this case is "legitimate defense". According to her, she had no choice but to kill the victim after getting into a scuffle while trying to stop the victim, who was caught kidnapping a minor. The defense argued that an elementary school girl who was present at the scene gave similar testimony, and that this constituted self-defense. However, Mr. Kaneshiro claimed at a press conference that a subsequent independent investigation revealed that the body had multiple bruises and wounds, indicating that he had been subjected to more violence than necessary. Furthermore, Mr. Kaneshiro announced that the elementary school student who was saved by the college student has retracted her testimony. In addition to the possibility that the elementary student had received some sort of threat. [...] This refers to the rumors about Mr. Kaneshiro. The female college student in question was hailed as a hero by [???] who said, ``An unidentified rumor of multiple murders has surfaced, and it is a legendary internet meme that leaves doubts about itself.'' It is said that there is Mr. Kaneshiro strongly condemned both.

Okay, so... this is a Really rough translation of what it says, I specially want you all to take the red part with a grain of salt. I don't think it's quite right, because Kotoko's finger makes them hard to read and translate. But there are some really interesting things. Hat girl retracted her testimony? Was this what upset Kotoko?

Anyway, I think by far the most interesting part about this is... the last part. That one about multiple murders, how Kotoko was hailed as a hero... and an internet meme? Did Kotoko by any chance become this kind of revered hero? Did she drown in the knowledge that she was right? I believe that Kotoko had a bit of a meltdown because not only she became what she hated the most, but also... everyone loved her for it? She's inviting us to vote her Guilty to continue the cycle. She wants us to keep punishing evil, and if that evil is her, so be it.

I honestly think this is an amazing way to end T2 because it leaves us with a question. Kotoko... will you forgive her? Will you understand what she did? Not only Kotoko, but everyone?

Or will you just say they're murderers and continue the cycle of guilt?

Because, a 100%, this is the look of a heartless murderer. Not someone full of trauma and regret. Kotoko Yuzuriha regrets what she has done. I'm not saying that she's entirely putting up a façade, but she is not the vigilante murderer we all took her as.

Also, she refers to Es as another prisoner here. 11, Inept. Just something to note.

They're still here, still here, it grates me.

Who's here, Kotoko...? Who are they? Finally, the symbol of the wolf again. I'm gonna repeat myself with my last post, but a lot of people have wrongly associated the wolf symbol with Kotoko, when in fact she was (or is) never depicted as such. She's always surrounded by them, she's part of the pack. But she's not a wolf. She's only going with them.

In HARROW, we see her surrounded by a pack of wolves, then the pack grows smaller and smaller until it ends with her alone and the skin of a wolf in her chair. And now, again, we don't see a wolf. We see a werewolf, a monstrous version of Kotoko.

What does this mean, genuinely? I'm sure Kotoko has a reason to act the way she acts. I really don't believe it's a traumatic childhood thing, I believe it's something a bit more recent.

Here's my final theory.

I believe Kotoko at first acted in a group, either in an official thing, such as the police, or just a group of vigilantes. But something happened, probably their views weren't lining properly, which caused her to quit. Where they too violent? Or the opposite, were they too tame for what Kotoko wanted?

Anyhow, I believe this last shot symbolizes that Kotoko doesn't really want to have much to do with her old group. But something has made her remember them. And made her be just like them.

I guess only time will tell.

#kotoko yuzuriha #yuzuriha kotoko #milgram #deep cover #deep cover spoilers

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