#god i could talk about her and how she has suffered more than jesus for ages (happy easter. lmao)

[dangoulains-devotion]

thinking just a bit too hard about how the added depth given to tifa and aerith's friendship only increases the weight threatening to crush tifa after the forgotten capital, she already had so much to carry on her weary shoulders, she's going to have to carry even more when mideel happens, and it doesn't even stop after meteorfall, ohg od oh i love her so much i

#(sobbing and crying and snotting everywhere) AERITH GAVE HER SOMEONE TO CONFIDE IN ON SUCH A TUMULTUOUS JOURNEY #SOMEONE SHE COULD BE AS CLOSE TO FULLY RELAXED AS POSSIBLE #SOMEONE TO GOSSIP WITH OR SHARE HER CONCERNS OR JUST. BE A NORMAL GIRL WITH #YUFFIE'S THERE BUT SHE'S JUST A KID AND TIFA WOULD NEVER WANT TO HARM THE AIR OF CAREFREE CHILDISHNESS SHE MANAGES TO MAINTAIN EVEN IF #ITS BECAUSE YUFFIE IS HIDING THINGS THAT ARE CRUSHING HER #but poor tifa . gentle tifa. is now left to regret. to blame herself. #she has barret who acts like a father figure to her sure - but despite how much she cares about him and values her frienship with him #he's not aerith. he's not someone she can just gossip about first loves with. not someone she can fully Relate to. if you get what i mean #she is left to trace back the thread of how poor aerith got caught in this mess #she was the one to ask aerith to save marlene. but how did they get there? aerith refused to let cloud be a bystander in wall market #how did that happen? she made a risky choice that put her in a position where their paths crossed. why? because cloud was briefly lost #during the bombing mission. why did the bombing mission happen? she couldn't stop it. ETC ETC #NONE OF IT WAS HER FAULT... BUT SHE NEVER WANTED TO DRAG INNOCENT PEOPLE INTO THIS AT ANY SINGLE POINT #AND NOW SOMEONE WHO QUICKLY BECAME A CLOSE FRIEND IS GONE oh lord my heart #all of this added onto the things like how alone she was in nibelheim... it was just her and her dad for some years after the boys all left #and then the Incident happens and she loses that last person she had... and to an extent another she didn't even know was right there(cloud #god i could talk about her and how she has suffered more than jesus for ages (happy easter. lmao) #FF7 Rebirth spoilers #just in case?? for anyone who's only playing the remakes i guess. since this was basically already there the remakes just elaborate on it #i think about 'we found you!' 'i guess you did!' SO OFTEN #these two girls mean the world to me and i will not let you reduce them to love interest rivals #when tifa ran over to aerith's body i think everyone in the world heard my heart shattering into dust #these thoughts are a bit disjointed and don't articulate well what i mean but god. god. i am thinking about her today

[deargodhelpmeaaa]

I'm writing about Berdly today

I fucking love Berdly

He is such an adorable little ray of sunshine

Spoilers ahead.

I played the snowgrave route first so I immediately was just feeling infinite levels of remorse for him, and then I just learned more about his character and JESUS CHRIST WHY IS HE SO RELATABLE HELP-

I think I'm a lot like him. I think we both kind of consider ourselves smart (I think what I want to be like varies per the situation but intelligence is definitely one of those things) but we also recognize that we really aren't and feel the need to try and keep up the facade of this intelligence. We see our intelligence as making us valuable, but in reality, and this is what I find so beautiful about how he was written, we don't need it to make us special. Also we both are kind of idiots ^^' Berdly is special because he is a kind, brave boy who cares about his friends. He might have a big ego but he is not a bad person.

I also found his loneliness relatable. His persona definitely scares a lot of people off. People REALLY don't like him (both in and out of universe). He's terribly antisocial and comically unable to read the room which are things that contribute to his "annoying" personality. Sometimes I feel like I'm worse than everyone else, too. I think I'm doing even worse in this regard because I don't really pride myself on much of anything at all... haha. Kill me.

But god Berdly's just so sweet and innocent and toby fox why the fuck didn't you add a scene where I can give him a hug asuidgjakalmgdujskndgm

I gave him the present because I knew he deserved it :) The way he reacted to that gesture really brightened my day. He was so happy. It really indicated how he doesn't get treated that well that often and that made me feel kind of sad.

ALSO ALSO the fact that he thinks Noelle has a crush on him bc she's nice to him makes me sad. Like he really thinks you need an ulterior motive for you to like him. Why :( my guess is he might not have had the best upbringing and maybe his parents weren't affectionate towards him and were downright mean to him which could explain a lot about why he is the way he is. I know Noelle was probably abused by her mom as well, but Berdly's complete inability to read the room may contribute to him not really knowing what's up, but still recognizing that Noelle needs someone to look out for her and wants to be that person for her.

His crush on Susie is hilarious in my opinion. She's the person who shows him he doesn't have to be perfect (at least his idea of perfect, which is smart) which commences his "idiot" arc which I find adorable and hilarious. Berdly makes me laugh. He's just so precious aaaaaaaaaa

Anyway I am so fucking upset that he's probably not going to be in the rest of the chapters but at the same time I think that it contributes to why Snowgrave hits so hard. You have this fully fleshed out, beautiful, cute, funny character not getting this development anymore because HE FUCKING DIED AAAAAAAAA!!! I actually don't mind when characters I like die, though, because it just intrigues me more than anything. Also I just like watching my favorite characters suffer soooo.... haha.

End berdly abuse today and y'all please for the love of god stop stereotyping him as a gross incel gamer bitch bc he's not. He's a nice boy :(

thanks for coming to my ted talk

#deltarune #berdly #berdly deltarune #deltarune chapter 2 #snowgrave #snowgrave route #noelle weird route #noelle holiday #susie deltarune

[yall-hate-kids-tourney]

Who has been screwed over by the fandom more?

Propaganda below the cut

Carl Grimes:

image i found was attached to an article about how he’s ‘the most annoying character of all time’ written by a grown adult. the concept of a kid growing up in the middle of the apocalypse could have been so interesting if there weren’t so many people screaming about how irritating he was. idk I always thought he was cool.

Ken Amada:

y'all are all for "murder and revenge plots" until is a 10 y/o boy who watched his mother die and started to become conflicted after realizing his moms killer is a secretly kind traumatized teenager to the point where the 10 y/o boy attempts to kill himself by giving himself up to assassins.

bro he's 10.

----

ken amada is such an interesting character with the unfortunate circumstances of having little screentime and atlus deciding to ruin his reputation forever by giving him a romance choice in the fem protag route. ken is a child who lost his mother at NINE. nobody ever believed him when he said that she was murdered, and that he saw who killed her. hes miserable, and all everyone around him does is give him sympathy while hes suffering and was forced to grow up before even going into middle school. hes angry and determined to get revenge on the person who killed his mother, and he doesnt even see the own value in living anymore beyond getting that revenge. hes more mature than most of his peers, and is desperate to be seen as an adult.but at the same time, he is still a child who likes superhero shows.

----

OH GOD WHERE DO I START

First there's the normal "The fandom hates kids" complaints of "He's so whiny" "he's so annoying" "oh my god kid just SHUT UP" y'know, the typical fandom stuff that makes you wonder if these people have ever talked to a child in their life

Second, there's (spoilers)...

October 4th, and the ENTIRE FANDOM is calling this kid a murderer.

For context, the moment in question doesn't necessarily paint him in the best light but its still understandable. Your team is going on a mission while Ken and another character named Shinjiro are away. In an alleyway, they have a talk where it is revealed that on that night a year priar to the game, Kens mom was killed in that allleyway by Shinjiro's Persona (Which, by the Rules of the Game Lore, basically means By Shinjiro). Ken tried to tell the authorities, the authorities didn't believe him because Magic Reasons and the death was ruled an accident.

Of course Ken is Fucking Pissed and wants revenge

However, because of Talk, he ACTIVELY CALMS DOWN, and realises "Hey, I probably shouldn't kill someone. Despite them, y'know, killing my mom"

HOWEVER REVOLVER JESUS COMES IN AND RUINS EVERYTHING BY SHOOTING SHINJIRO. AND LIKE, IF YOU PLAY P3P YOU CAN /AVOID THE DEATH THING/

AND EVERYONE BLAMES /KEN/. AND ONLY KEN.

And third (yes, there's a THIRD) IS THE FUCKING FEMC ROMANCE THING. WHICH JUST...SHOULDN'T HAVE EXISTED IN THE FIRST PLACE. BUT NOW HE'S "SHOTA BAIT" BECAUSE WE HAVE TO BLAME THE CHILD FOR THE AUTHORITY FIGURE COMING ONTO THEM 😒

#yall hate kids tourney #round 1a #the walking dead #twd #carl grimes #persona #persona 3 #persona 3 fes #persona 3 portable #persona 3 reload #p3 #p3fes #p3p #p3reload #ken amada #amada ken #cw age gap #cw suicide

[dankbog]

I work a job where I sit on the street and talk to people about transgender rights. Shockingly, I have some bad experiences. Yesterday was one of the most draining experiences I've had after 9 months of doing this, and I feel like I learned a lot from it about the conservative mindset.

My coworker and I stopped an older woman who immediately wanted to argue against trans rights. (I'm a trans man, and my coworker is cis.) In what ended up being an hour long conversation, I learned so much about this woman. She oscillated from making arguments against the humanity of trans people and trauma dumping. It was baffling to us at the time- we were genuinely trying to have a conversation with this woman and maybe deconstruct some of her arguments. She used all of the expected conservative arguments that fell apart immediately when questioned. But she never seemed to care if we could refute any point she had- she'd just move on to the next one or would launch into a story about how miserable her life has been.

After pondering the interaction, I realized that none of the arguments she was making were things she believed. She was repeating talking points she heard from PragerU and Fox News, but didn't care if they were true. Her real argument was that if she had been "forced" to have a miserable life, everyone else should as well. She tried to tell me over and over that there were more important things than my happiness that I should be seeking- travel, having babies, finding Jesus. She was insistent that a trip to Greece was all I needed, not top surgery. She even quoted Jordan Peterson, who apparently said something along the lines of "you should find adventure rather than happiness." Terrible advice, in my opinion.

I've noticed this in other conversations with conservatives. "Abortion wasn't around and I had to have 4 kids and we were struggling!" For some people, going through a difficult situation produces empathy. They don't want to see someone else suffer the way they have. But the belief I see from conservatives is that if they suffered, everyone else should have to suffer. It isn't fair that I could be happy and content in myself if she isn't. I also must suffer through life as miserable as she is- and if I won't do that willingly by God would she try to force me to.

[queen-of-weird-girl-nation]

@auroraofthesun1

Diary of a teenage Christian girl

Monday 1st August 2024

Writing late at night so this makes no sense. I’m under the covers in Esther’s bunk bed and she’s drawing me. She draws me much prettier than I am and she says I write her much prettier than she used to. I am truly blessed by the lord for such a good friend.

So here’s what happened when we arrived

Apparently we have a room switch up, after we’d unpacked which was annoying but expected. Camp is apparently always sorta unorganised like that! I’m still with Esther, Praise the Lord on high, but with an entirely different group.

In the group there’s 4 other girls, and my sister isnt here. I don’t really mind though. It’s not that we don’t get along, but me and Darlene aren’t very buddy buddy. We chat but run in different circles, it’s fine. I have 8 siblings, I don’t have to be super close with all of them.

The four girls are : Rachel, Mary, Ruth (not the other Ruth, we have a lot of Ruth’s in our church) and Sarah.

It’s kind of encouraged to talk bad about your roommates. Me and Esther do it a lot, and I know they do it too. It seems ingrained into church culture. I see mom do it, I see the ladies at church do it. Everyone’s a judge.

Like how Mary’s a glutton who probably loves food more than the Lord and Rachel’s a slut who admitted to wearing a certain outfit for male attention and Ruth has a necklace with a crystal on it which she swears is fake but I don’t believe it.

Me and Esther are sinners too, everyone is. I think I am the worst and ye the best, I think that I am so much better but the scum of the earth, I am the best Christian in this room and yet the most unworthy in the eyes of the Lord. Ive done a lot for christ, and so has Esther. Esther fasts. She fasts most of her time, and barely eats. I admire her dedication. I fast a lot too, and supliment never eating with praying. Praying so much. I scream to the Lord. Always

If I’m not thinking about God then what am I thinking of? Picture God and Jesus standing on heaven looking at me and judging me. They see everything and every thought. They KNOW!

But other than that I chatted with my roommates and other than the stuff I mentioned they all seemed great. We went to the sermon, which was powerful.

We spent the first hour thirty minutes singing worship songs and praise. I might have permanent hearing problems sorry Lord that last comment was ungrateful for even if the Lord brings sorrow I will rejoice and rejoice in my suffering suffering suffering. I am not suffering. I have the Lord.

I cried during the sermon, when they talked about how Jesus died for me. The guilt could have crushed me and I felt so happy. Happy that I was feeling the right emotions, guilt. Esther was crying too, and I knew she wouldn’t eat tomorrow. Good for her. I should fast too. I would, praying and fasting and praying and begging to be forgiven. Forgiven for what? The crime of existing.

A couple kids collapsed, sobbing, touched by the spirit. It didn’t happen to me. I felt awful, why didn’t I happen to me. It happened to Rachel and she cried about her parents divorce tainting her. At least she’s self aware. I’ll fall to the ground next time. We’re here for threee weeks.

The sermon was on sacrifice. I remember hearing a similar one when I was 7, the day I knew I would gladly die a martyr. I had my martyrship perfectly planned since I was 7, and with a bit of tweaking I’d made a perfect death.

It would be when I was still young, because it would be more inspiring that way. Id be in a situation of oppression. A shooter would come in to my class room, a big scary atheist who hated Christian’s and wanted us dead. And I wouldn’t hide, and would sing Amazing Grace. I would sing amazing grace while he shot me and my final words would be praising the Lord. I would be loved and adored even in death. I would certainly go to heaven. That was my dream. My greatest wish is to die.

Esther showed me her drawing. She’s a great artist, and drew me adorable . She says I am adorable.

She’s adorable too. I’m gonna sleep now.

Forever the Lords

Grace

#did anyone else have a martyr fantasy? #just me ok #she’s so brainwashed ilhsm #tw ed but not sheeran #tw religious themes #tw christianity #tw evangelical #tw Christian guilt #tw ed implied #tw religious trauma #diary of a teenage Christian girl

[aprillikesthings]

s5 ep2 Launch

ey did you see I posted some cosplay progress

I am v excited :D

anyway time for more She-Ra re-watch

My semi-frequent reminder that these are a re-watch, spoilers ahoy, I make a lot of dumb jokes and talk about other stuff

eugh

man I know I keep saying this but they REALLY lean into the allusions to Christianity, like he straight up says "remade in my image"

"But first, you must prove yourselves worthy. Your leader, your...She-Ra, she would see you suffer in darkness for her sake" okay Satan in the Garden of Eden

"Cast aside this false hero and deliver her to me" like is he talking about She-Ra or is he Pontius Pilate talking about Jesus (...actually a better analogy is probably Pharaoh talking about Moses)

"Prime sees all. Prime knows all. They will not escape my judgement"

OKAY not to get into religion TOO much, but I keep wanting to point out that the version of Christianity they're repeatedly and non-subtle-y alluding to is absolutely one that exists and gives people a shit-ton of religious trauma. The writers etc are clearly doing this in response to that kind of Christianity. We know Nate grew up in that kind of church.

BUT. It's just so foreign to me.

Like, I've talked to a lot of my friends about how I have what feels a lot like survivor's guilt, because I didn't grow up religious at all--much less in a high-control church. (I was baptized in one, but we left before it could do any harm.) My personal experience of Christianity in the churches I've attended has been really good, non-judgey, and full of queer folks.

So I'm fully aware that the lines about "I see everything and I'M JUDGING YOU (and you are going to special space hell)" is referencing the way a lot of churches portray God. And I'm just like...but that's....not the God I know. That's not the God my church teaches.

But also UGGGH there's a ton of churches that DO portray God this way and I don't want to diminish the harm they do by pulling some "Not All Churches" bullshit! D:

I'm not doing a good job explaining myself. Blargh.

relatable.

OH HEY they fixed Mara's ship

Daci and I had a conversation just last night about how, of the few times I have actually yelled at them, it was because I was trying to sleep and they were being noisy, and now if I'm trying to sleep and other people are being noisy Daci will shush them.

The only thing that excites Entrapta more than robots is space, apparently

But yeah everyone has a conversation about how she did betray them to join the Horde and it's reasonable to worry she might do it again.

LOL

don't be a creep, Catra

okay I can't get a representative screenshot, but the bit where Horde Prime takes over a clone's body to in order to tell Catra I'M ALWAYS WATCHING YOU is creepy as SHIT

Anyway he grabs Glimmer and walks off which can't be good

The way Mermista keeps calling Entrapta "geek princess" is kind of cute

ANYWAY Horde Prime is laying it on thick again. "Worlds I brought into my eternal light."

"I take no joy in destruction."

BLEHHHHHHH

Glimmer lemme use your weapon. If everyone is fuckin' dead there will be peace and won't that be nice :D

I'm...horribly reminded of my Dad's opinion of the middle east, which was "just kill them all and let God sort them out." He was only slightly joking. Ugh.

...and this is how she finds out her Dad is still alive D:

Yeah, I'd feel like shit too

Anyway she says she won't help him, but shattering the pretty globe was unnecessary

True story: I was on a leash for a bit as a kid. I'm actually not mad about that at all--I had a tendency to wander off (...I still do) and one of my very earliest memories is realizing I was lost in a mall, and going into a hair salon to tell them I was lost because that's what Sesame Street said to do--tell someone who works there. But my memories are still from a toddler's POV--everything in the salon is HUGE and I could stand under the counter.

Anyway leashing Entrapta was a good idea

LISTEN. I know I've made this joke before. But Entrapta has absolutely made herself robots for sex reasons.

Either that, or she's made Hordak role play. Possibly both.

😬

And Entrapta's response of genuine surprise and "are you all...mad at me??"

I remember it was this scene, the first time through, that made me really realize: oh it's not just my headcanon that she's autistic. This was intentional, from the start.

Honestly this whole scene is just too good:

Mermista: "You’re seriously just realizing that? Yeah, we’re mad!" Perfuma: "You don’t consider how your actions affect other people! Even people who are supposed to be your friends." Frosta: "Like us. The ones getting beat up by your dumb bots. And whose kingdoms you almost destroyed." Entrapta: "I’m not good at people. But I am good at tech. I thought maybe if I could use tech to help you, you’d like me. But I messed that up, too. (she runs off) Mermista: "Entrapta, no! I said we have to leave! Can you listen for once in your life?" Entrapta: "I’m sorry I’m bad at listening! I’m sorry I mess everything up!"

Mermista: "You’re still trying to get the signal?" Entrapta: "Of course. Glimmer needs us."

OH GOD it's so funny Entrapta walks up to a structure made by Horde Prime and does sexy-voice "ooooh what's inside of youuuu" then slaps herself with her own hair LOLOL

Anyway she figures out where Horde Prime's ship is but also finds out they're sending more ships to Etheria

it's like the dream she keeps having but she's awake!!

too many damn portals in this show

something about how leaving high-control religious groups sucks because for a lot of people it feels like losing your sense of purpose (I'm mutuals with a bunch of exvangelicals on twitter okay)

"It wasn’t my destiny to be She-Ra, was it? It was random. Light Hope brought me through the portal because she needed to use the weapon. That’s the only reason I’m here. I don’t know what my destiny is anymore. But I know my friends need my help. I guess I’ll just figure it out from there. Thanks for everything."

OH she was asleep after all.

(I hate it when I have those dreams where I get up and start getting ready for my day and then realize I'm still actually asleep. I've had dreams where I do it over and over, too! Not restful at all!)

LOL

Adora: lol I feel great damn Bow: oh thank god BECAUSE WE HAVE TO LEAVE RIGHT NOW AHHHH ALSO THE SHIP IS WORKING AND WE FOUND GLIMMER BUT YEAH WE GOTTA GO RIGHT THIS SECOND

I love Mermista

Also, show of hands, how many of us were weird fucking kids and would've killed for someone in our peer group to tell us "you being weird is a good thing"

Thank God for adulthood and finding people who like me the way I am

(but also thank God for learning some social skills)

yeah. I know that feeling. ;_;

LOL

but yeah Adora, Bow, and Entrapta take off on the ship :D

aaaahhhh the moment when Glimmer asks Catra to stay. "Just...for a little." And Catra's tiny, quiet, "...okay."

AND END OF EPISODE, ROLL CREDITS

MAN. this is such a turning point for Glimmer and Catra.

Because at the end of s4 we had this:

Glimmer: "Guess you wanted all my attention for yourself. Your troops are gone. You're all alone. You've lost." Catra: "What are you waiting for? Do it. Looks like we're both alone, Sparkles."

But as she'd just said to Scorpia--"We're the good guys, remember?" So she doesn't hurt Catra. And instead they both get raptured onto Horde Prime's ship, and here they are.

Most of this post is about Shadow Weaver, but I think he's right:

I think it's less "mental gymnastics" and more that she'd literally just been asked by Scorpia not to hurt her and did the "nah, we're the good guys" line. I do wonder if she regretted not doing it at any point, but I think she's too eaten up by the fact that she set off the Heart of Etheria to worry about whether or not she should've murdered or imprisoned Catra.

But at this point (in s5) they're both terrified: Horde Prime could just kill both of them any time he wanted. He doesn't actually need either of them after all. They're just bait at this point, hoping to get She-Ra, and he's pretty sure either of them will work. (Though does Adora even know Catra is on the ship? I don't think so???) But if it hadn't been for Mara's ship he would have eventually found Adora, at least.

But yeah Glimmer and Catra are both just scared and lonely and and even an enemy is better than no one if they're someone familiar (and not trying to hurt you).

UGH THIS SHOW IS SO GOOD

#april rewatches spop #launch

[holocene-sims]

next // previous

june 17, 2021 12:00 p.m. st. francis catholic cemetery

dear grant,

by the time you read this, i don’t know where you’ll be in life, but i can’t imagine this becoming irrelevant. at least for me, while i'm writing this, it’s one day after i overheard you and your best friend henry talking in your room. you said, “i don’t believe in god but i think i'm missing something because you and everyone else i know seem to think he’s real.” and i know you were talking about me before that.

it’s not the first time i've heard you really confused about, well, what’s out there. you asked me a while ago why i was so comfortable not trying to treat my cancer and just letting myself go naturally. i told you that’s something you have to do sometimes in difficult situations, but that’s not really the full story. i'm okay with it because i believe in something better. it’s not about whether i'm right or not, or whether god and a heaven are really out there. it’s just about believing in something and feeling comfortable in it.

but you know, i think being able to say i believe in god and a heaven and that jesus christ died for me is a sign of privilege. lately, being sick is the first thing in my life (my life, we're not talking about everything else bad in the world) that has ever made me question anything about my beliefs. i've always been able to get away with saying there’s a god-made reason for everything and that everything will turn out okay. it’s not so easy to rationalize anymore when you’re facing something really bad.

i don’t think you have the same privilege i do. you've had a much harder life than me. i can’t understand why, but mom is terrible to you. why would you believe in a benevolent god who loves you and wants the best for you when you’ve spent your whole life suffering? it doesn’t make any sense, does it? it doesn’t make sense to me either. i'm sorry if my beliefs ever made you feel worse. as much as i believe, i can poke a lot of holes in my beliefs. it’s been a while since i've been able to really say that god has a plan. i think he’s out there and i think he loves us, but i don’t think he controls us. if he does, then i have a serious problem with what he’s done to you. there’s a theory about that concept of god not being in control, but i can’t remember what i read. i'm sure you could talk to father lonergan about it, though. he’s kind of secretly sacrilegious in his beliefs, more than you’d think.

anyway, don’t feel bad for not being able to believe in what a lot of us believe in. i promise you you’re not the only one, and you won’t hurt anyone for not believing. uncle paddy is an atheist and no one gives a fuck. i know you take after the way he talks, so maybe that’ll make you feel better :) our grandma also knows a suspicious amount about old irish paganism and folk beliefs and she’s always been very open-minded towards other religions, so don’t confuse yourself thinking she’s all that devout and worried about your eternal salvation. i don’t know what she actually believes, but i don’t think it’s what she says out in the open. you should ask her about it when you’re ready.

most of all, i'm not hurt by you having different beliefs. the only thing that hurts me is that you’re confused. i don’t want you to feel that way. no matter what, i can accept anything that happens to me because i think there’s something better after this, but you don’t have something to cling to, to make you feel comfortable. i don’t get the impression you really like the fully scientific belief either. not to put words in your head (feel free to mark up this letter and tell me how wrong i am) but i think you’re scared that there’s nothing out there at all, that all there is in life is without purpose and meaning. if the universe did create itself (which it did, i'm not an idiot), then you still have to grapple with how the event that made such a beautiful universe also created evil.

neither explanation satisfies you, does it?

again, there’s a reason we believe in all these things. it’s seriously not about correctness. all belief systems are equally "right." it’s just about that believing does something for us. you don’t even have to believe in the same thing forever. i just hope you find something that brings you comfort. i don’t want you to suffer. and i don’t want you to feel like i'm not with you anymore.

that’s the other thing about believing in heaven for me. the thing that makes me most scared of dying is leaving everyone behind. and i'm actually scared of that. i won't tell you that now because it doesn't make me feel any better to see you scared. i don’t want to say goodbye to you, to kelly, our grandparents, to our cousins, to my friends...but i have to. i have to, but i hope and believe i'll see you all again someday. i don’t just want to have something nice beyond this. i want the reunion of family and friends. i actually want that most of all. if i could only have any one benefit of the afterlife, i'd take the reunion. i don't know how that would works or if it's real, but i pray it is, and i pray that you will all be there regardless of your beliefs.

i love you very much <3 see you in the future. just don’t make it anytime soon, okay?

- your favorite sister, elizabeth

#ts4 #the sims 4 #sims 4 #ts4 screenshots #sims 4 story #simblr #hlcn: everything the stars promised #hint hint we are throwing it back to the opening paragraph of this story WHEEE #holocene.docx #holocene.png #hlcn: grant

[anotherapostate]

Fairly long vent under the cut because I have Problems and I’m not entirely sure how to talk about it with the people in my life.

(featuring: wedding woes, conservative Christianity, dresses, an ex-gf, alcohol mention)

Before I was out (or even realized that I was a lesbian for that matter), I attended a four-year Christian college with the purpose of taking a ministerial position within my (conservative, evangelical) denomination. You can imagine how well that went. Once I graduated, I left the faith and lost contact with a lot of friends. This was my fault, but the shame I felt within those first six months was too much to bear, and I couldn’t face my peers who were still in the faith. The few friends I retained from that time mean a lot to me, even if our beliefs aren’t the same anymore. It’s hard to explain, but my experiences at that school seem so incomprehensible to others that weren't there with us (or didn't have a similar experience), that it’s like, “well, we believe different things, but at least I can talk to you about this very formative time in my life and feel understood. You don’t look at me like I have three heads.”

All that to say, my college roommate is getting married and I’m invited to the wedding, which I’m excited for. She’s still in the faith, but she’s always been more left-leaning than our peers. She knows I’m queer and still invited me to her wedding (just the thought makes me want to cry). I’ve already RSVP’ed to the shower/wedding, so it’s too late to back out now, but the more I think about this wedding, the more stressed I feel.

In the Bridal Shower invitation, the stated dress code is “fall/summer dresses.” Dear Reader, I have not worn a dress since my college graduation in 2019. I am a fat, hairy butch with an undercut and a dress-less wardrobe. But I don’t want to make a fuss on a day that isn’t mine, so I ordered a skirt online and figured I could Dyke It Up. But the idea of wearing this skirt makes me feel sick. Like I’m choosing to wear a costume to make others happy. Like I’m impersonating my former college self: closeted, afraid, shame-filled. And even taking the "college-self impersonation" out of the equation, I don't feel at home in traditionally feminine clothing anymore. I wish I had the language to express these feelings. Using vocabulary like “gender dysphoria” feels incorrect to describe my (cisgendered) experience, and I don’t want to misuse words meant to describe trans experiences. But god, this feeling has to be adjacent? A cousin or step-sibling? If the skirt don’t have pockets and I have to bring some sort of bag, I would rather fling myself into the Atlantic. The thought of bringing a purse is almost unbearable. Now, I know the obvious solution is to ask if I could wear pants, but again — it feels like I’m making my friend’s day about myself. I think my social anxiety would prefer me suffering in a skirt than being seen as the Dyke that needed Accommodation.

I will be wearing a jacket/pants for the actual day of the wedding. I’m less concerned about this. I know my peers (and maybe former professors if any are present?) will stare, but hey — half of them probably suspected I was gay in school anyway. Not much use in hiding now. What will be awkward is talking to people I haven’t spoken to in years and nod along with the Jesus talk.

I am 99.99% sure my ex from college will be there. We don’t talk, we aren’t friends, and I still have a grudge against her for reasons I won’t get into here. Which means that we’ve gone from “two queer women hiding our queer relationship from our peers” to “two queer women hiding our former queer relationship and current misgivings with one another from our peers.” Which is demented and stupid and probably a great plot for a fanfic if I wasn’t already living it. (If someone wants to write a fic about this, be my guest. Please give meaning to my very silly sufferings.) There is a chance that she will be at the head table/in the wedding party, in which case I won’t have to sit near her, but I know myself and I probably will feel petty about that too.

If this is a dry wedding (and there’s a good chance — my former denomination is dry) and I have to deal with all of the above, I will probably combust. Part of me want to bring a flask, but if others smell alcohol on me, that will put me in a worse light and give validity to the belief that I’m unhappy because I’m “living separate from God” (see: living as a lesbian).

#personal

[walkswithmyfather]

“You Are Valuable to God” By Rick Warren:

“You are extremely valuable to God. He even said in Isaiah 43:4, “You are precious in my eyes, and honored, and I love you” (ESV).

Why are you so valuable to him? One, you are valuable because God is your Father, and you are his child. The Bible says, “Look at the birds. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren’t you far more valuable to him than they are?” (Matthew 6:26 NLT).

Two, you are valuable because Jesus gave his life for you. The Bible says, “You have been bought and paid for by Christ, so you belong to him” (1 Corinthians 7:23 TLB).

The fact that you belong to God adds incredible value to your life. When you go to an auction, things that once belonged to famous people often cost much more. It could be an ordinary jar, instrument, or a pair of shoes. But if it was owned by a famous musician, athlete, or president, the value goes up. Would a rock star’s guitar be worth more than one of my guitars? Of course! You see, common things can have great value, depending on who the owner is.

But value doesn’t depend only on who owns something; it also depends on what somebody’s willing to pay for it. I remember reading a story about a girl who was kidnapped. She was the daughter of a very wealthy and influential king. This king put the word out: “Any price will be paid for her return. She’s the king’s daughter.”

You are the King’s daughter or son. You are God’s child. The greatest ransom ever paid was paid for you by Jesus Christ. Jesus came to Earth and suffered for you. God exchanged his own Son for your salvation—for your freedom. Christ gave his life so that you could have eternal life.

If you want to know how valued you are, just look at the cross. The cross proves your value. If someone has ever told you you’re worthless, they’re dead wrong. You are not worthless. You are priceless. And you are infinitely valuable to God in Christ.

Talk It Over:

• While reading this devotional, what did you hear God say to you about how precious you are to him?

• When people don’t believe they have any God-given value, what conclusions do they make about life?

• When you don’t look to the cross, where do you usually turn to find your value?”

#bible #god #belief in god #faith in god #jesus #belief in jesus #faith in jesus #christian blog #bible verses #bible truths #christian faith #christian devotionals #pastor rick's daily hope #rick warren #christian life #christianity #christian inspiration #christian living #encouragement #biblequotes #bible scripture #bibletranslations #matthew 6:26 #isaiah 43:4 #1 corinthians 7:23 #salvation #the cross #keep the faith #make him known

[heartshapedcreaturefromcriptoon]

I’m so fucking sick of this pattern of bullshit every time I go into these goddamn fucking tags:

I’m so fucking sick of all these bizarro unhinged Vivziepop Fanti Fandom Centrist “Critical Accounts” invading the tags to finger wag at people while they cry about abuse and hypocrisy as they, ~in all seriousness~ try to convince us how Viv Medrano is simply too young to be a critically acclaimed animation juggernaut and instead, just needs to have her pencil taken away from her and should like, probably be placed under a conservatorship of some sort and have her babies be placed into the hands of a more capable man, or should be institutionalized for the good of her own health for being naïve enough to hold the notion that her tiny teeny jelly beanie brain could possibly hold enough power in it to run two shows at once and she should just like, you know... Stay out of sight in the psych ward until she can learn to let go of her crazy dreams because clearly she’s killing herself and her own fanbase are the ones who keep feeding off of, and abusing that numbing drug that is her bruised ego. 

The antis who kept wishing death on her and accusing her of being a racist, pedo zoophile have absolutely nothing to do with wether she’s actually depressed or not (not that that’s any of this blogs business) but how DARE you think I endorse those behaviors! Shame on YOU Vivziepop Standom! 

Breaking the bit now though I knew this was a bullshit post the second they started rambling about “both shows slowly declining”.... Hazbin Hotel isn’t even out yet what the fuck are these people on about?! Sounds like someone’s more than a bit angry about Angel Dust’s Boob Floof Angle. 

A. Once more, the absolute eeriness of misogynists concern trolling over this women’s health by instructing her what to do. So like, another example of the disturbing implications of behaving like you’d rather have this women be placed under a conservatorship than be her own Show Creator..

B. Who the fuck even talks like this anymore? I sense that squeecore is more your thing, but I thought you of all people would know better that we are in fact in The Owl House generation of Yuri themed Harry Potter rip offs now. Not *Actual* Harry Potter. Get a life. 

Once again this shit has absolutely fuck all to do to with Anti Culture screaming and creaming over Viv Medrano allegedly loving blackface and raping children and dogs and hitting the ground running with this narrative the second the pilot premiered and before the show even got any breathing room as this backlash to her very existence only worsened as time went on and her work got green-lit by this major Hollywood studio only to be immediately protested after by the same rabid hive mind who triggered all this shit happening in the first place. Nope. It’s exclusively Vivziepops own fanbase that’s to blame. Nothing else.

....Why is this dude talking about Viv as if she’s been placed on suicide watch and he’s the medic responsible for bringing her in? Jesus. The woman making a tweet a week ago about taking a break from socials proves to be the exact opposite of “hurting herself”.

The ones who are trying to act as her personal policers obsessing over every breath she takes and every move she makes are the only ones contributing to any hurt and suffering here. Including mine. Quit being a creep and get a life!

 Disney Adult Blog

Bright Blue Color Scheme

Marvel Blog 

“Just A Little Critique blog”

“DNI if anti hazbin (with a few exceptions if ur one of da good ones ... UWU)”

oh-god-dude , THANK YOU for being yet another shining example of how all Hazbin Fanti Discourse blogs have shit taste, no space for their centrist bullshit opinions within the genuine fandom, and continue to be the most insidious frickers alive for enabling the very Anti Culture that causes so much harm to come invade our spaces and then turn around and act as though the only ones who are responsible for Viv’s own personal experiences with pain and suffering that you couldn’t possibly know of, is all inflicted by her own fans and absolutely no one else as if you think you’re not contributing just as much to our problems .  We hate you!

Like, the absolute gall and irony of modding an Anti Friendly “VivziePop Criticism” blog, acting like you’re not an Anti while you’re using a reaction gif of one of Britney Spear’s abusive ex boyfriends to snidely “critique” Viv Medrano’s work while you put your little fanti cult on a pedestal as you essentially treat Vivienne Medrano as the Britney Spears of modern animation (in the negative context here) constantly posturing over Medrano’s health and wellness and questioning Viv’s own agency to be in control because you’re just as bitter and misogynistic and resentful towards Viv as the ones who ruined Britney’s life and then act like they did nothing wrong? Delicious.

Well, Owl House ain’t going back to you, that’s for sure!

For me Hazbin is just catered to be the perfect treat for a specific kind of adult Animation nerd to indulge and I’m only saying this now because I’ve come reconcile with the fact that Viv Medrano’s work will most like be the only sets of Western Cartoons that I’ll ever care about again in my Adult Life after Hazbin Hotel is finished as a series.

But hey, if you wanna still choose Disney Cartoons that were canceled for being too gay over an enriching indie adult animation..... Be my guest.

If an Adult Cis Man posted this I’m kind of disappointed and squicked out.

If a kid posted this then they need to stay out of these tags!

The rest of you need to stop mixing your children’s media in with my Animated Adult Horror Musical!

But yes, everyone needs to stop hate humping on Viv Medrano’s leg and just leave her alone.

#Hazbin Hotel #hazbin hypocritical #Helluva Boss #anti culture #antis #anti anti #fantis #fanti #harrassment #untranscribed #undescribed #It's never 'Hey I'm tired of this adult animation so I'm gonna watch THIS adult animation'! #It's always: 'Hey I'm tired of this adult animation so I'm going back to this kids cartoon!' #Anyway don't be a fanti! #They'll always find a a way to twist any bad situation and use it to fit their agenda!

[dazaiizm]

✦ › CHAPTER ONE ━━ mind games

↳ synopsis: despite olivia leaving the port mafia four years ago, chuuya still can't get the blonde hair girl out of his head. and now he has to suffer the consequence of his actions by dealing with a personal problem . . . ♡

↳ content warnings: swearing, mentions of the black market, palming under the desk, sexual fantasies and slight fluff . . . ♡

↳ notes from chuuya's angel: first chapter in and there's already smut 😞 (not rrly but yk what i mean). also subby chuuya is cute <33

↳ taglist: @little-miss-chaoss

"nakahara, are you even listening?" chuuya's eyes drifted up from looking down at the desk to mori and his spot at the end of the long table where many other mafia executives sat.

"yeah, i am," the ginger responded as he had one gloved hand over his mouth whilst the other rested on his thigh - or that's what the members in the room assumed for it to be.

"really? because you've been zoning out the past few minutes, i was starting to think you died," mori's cheeky grin and provoke made chuuya huff in annoyance.

"ha fucking ha, mori," he rolled his eyes, taking the hand from his mouth to adjust his signature hat before resting his arm on the armrest of the black leather chair.

a small hum escaped mori's mouth before he went back to discussing whatever he was talking about. chuuya couldn't care less if he was gonna be honest, despite his usual attitude towards meetings like these. i mean, it's kind of hard to pay attention to selling organs to the black market as he has a boner that he's trying so hard to tame just from a few strokes with his thumb.

although he was notorious for becoming so aggressive about someone provoking or even teasing him in the slightest, chuuya was lucky that he was able to cover up his erotic mood with a small scowl. just a couple more strokes, that's all and he'll finally be able to get back to business. he knew that was a lie, of course; chuuya knows he isn't a god damn idiot and that only made his erection become much worse.

'fucking hell...' he huffed to himself, swallowing thickly as the room's heat became thicker; at least that's what he thought as he loosened his tie.

slowly, he started thrusting the air, clenching his stomach as his thumb only went faster and faster against his throbbing cock. why now? why did he have to think about olivia right now? chuuya seriously needs to get over himself, that's what he keeps saying day and night, but once again, he knew that was a lie. it wasn't just him either, koyo said it as well and he's sure that everyone else in the mafia would agree too if they knew.

he's never even fucked olivia before and yet he still pictures just how warm her gummy walls would feel as he ploughs himself inside her repeatedly. fuck, he can even imagine the cute sounds that'd come out her mouth as well, begging for him to cum while he only silenced her whimpers with a kiss.

jesus, chuuya missed her lips so much. other than the times where he would hold her hand or when he rested his head on her shoulder, he loved kissing her the most. mainly because of how her face flushed upon pulling away, which only made him kiss her more.

"don't think about her like that..." chuuya mumbled to himself, tapping his foot softly while shutting his eyes. pitch black was all he saw and he was pleased with that, he wouldn't be able to have a picture perfect image of how olivia would look like spread out on this damn table.

okay, that just made it ten times worse because he could imagine the sounds she would desperately try to cover up as he fucked her in front of his subordinates. chuuya knows she wouldn't be into that kind of stuff, but this is the same girl who left him hickeys despite knowing she would get some in return and be equally shy when someone brings them up.

they were like two sides of the same coin, she and him. they both always had something to bond over whether it'd be their small statures that they wished would go away by the time they reach their twenties (spoiler: it didn't work) or the kind of animes they loved watching (mainly tokyo revengers, despite chuuya's endless denials). even that dumbass dazai and luma said they were meant for each other.

chuuya had it all with olivia and he could have had so much more if he didn't fuck up. by now, they could have been so much closer, even going as far as to think that they could have been married. shit, she'd look so much more cuter in that pink wedding dress she spotted when they were out on a walk together back then.

after what seemed like forever, his climax finally brushed over him as he covered his mouth with pink cheeks. christ, he must have been holding himself back for a while because his cum was soaking through his pants.

almost instantly, chuuya shot up from his seat and left the meeting room, leaving everyone staring at the slowly shutting double doors. at least he was able to breathe after being in the room for thirty minutes straight, but now he's got to sort himself out again before anyone comes looking for him.

but if he gets hard again, chuuya will swear that he'll cut his fucking dick off. as soon as he gets dressed, he'll splash some water over his face and just take a couple of moments to compose himself. i mean, it shouldn't be impossible to forget the girl that he shared nearly his first everything with... right?

#📜 — olivia #🩷 — livchu #💋 — kiss the devil

[wolint]

FRESH MANNA

DO WHATEVER HE TELLS YOU

John 2:5

The spiritual walk is about hearing and heeding, hearing and obeying. It doesn’t matter who’s doing the talking, if it’s based on the word of God, then doing what the word says is paramount.

Weddings and mothers! Yeah, we've been to those at some point with "mother," right? Only we didn’t think we'd be working to either provide or top-up the refreshments.

It’s awesome that Jesus stepped into His earthly ministry at a wedding! And providing wine! He did not discriminate on what His Father’s business needed; making wine, raising the dead, healing the sick, you name it, all part of His Father’s business.

Mary noticed the problem and wanted to do something about it, but what could she do? Even though she didn’t have the resources to solve the problem, she knew who has the resources: Jesus. With unbounded confidence in Him, she simply puts the need before him: “They have no wine.” Seriously! She expects Jesus to use His supernatural powers and anointing to make wine.

God is always in the details and joy is the purpose!

Mary instructed the waiters to “do whatever Jesus tells them”. That instruction is for everyone: whatever Christ tells you, do! Nobody is exempted from spiritual activities, commands, and assignments.

And the servers did exactly what Jesus told them to do! His instruction was simple: fill six large stone jars with water and then bring a glass to the steward of the feast. Whenever I read this part, I can just imagine their reaction to Jesus’ words. “You want us to do WHAT???!!!!” They must have thought He was crazy. Remember Jesus hadn’t performed any miracles before, so they probably didn’t know who He was.

It would have sounded like He was telling them to give their boss water and pretend it was wine. It must have seemed ludicrous to them. But they did it anyway.

We must do whatever the Lord tells us to do!

We’re not only supposed to follow if it seems reasonable to us or if it makes sense, as 1 Corinthians 1:27-29 states, that the things of God are foolishness to the unbeliever. Like the servants in this story, we’re called to follow God’s will unconditionally and serve Him no matter what.

The simplicity and humility of Mary’s approach are how we need to approach Jesus. He is our Saviour and loves us unconditionally.

In our needs, confusion, troubles, and sufferings, we should make Mary’s prayer our own: “They – we, I – have no wine…” That’s a great example for us to follow. We don’t always know what God is doing with us or where He’s taking us, but we should trust Him anyway.

We all need someone to encourage us, someone who will even see where we need to be and get a little pushy with us like Mary. Do you have a Mary? We won’t accomplish much if no one is in the background encouraging us to keep going.

Esther did not learn obedience at the palace but under Mordecai, her cousin, Esther 4:14 says she obeyed. If she had not lived in obedience to Mordecai before now, she wouldn’t have obeyed Mordecai’s instruction. God doesn’t ask more of us than we can give Him. If all we can do is just obey without feeling optimistic about the outcome of our actions, God will accept that. The important thing is that we stay the course, not that we always understand it or feel good about it. So, whatever He asks you to do, do!

PRAYER: Father, grant me the grace and ability to be committed and obedient to your word in Jesus’ name. Amen.

Shalom

Women of light international prayer ministries.

#spotify #devotional #christianpost #women's ministry #biblestudy #biblestudy christianpost women's ministry #biblestudy christianpost 'women's ministry

[god-whispers]

may 6

books of the bible

"all scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness." 2 tim 3:16

but what if you had to choose, God forbid.  here are some of my favorites.  i know you must have those that you return to over and over.  we are blessed that we can choose.  we need to hide as much of it as you can in our hearts.

genesis - "in the beginning..." gen 1:1 one can't get more basic than that.  He was the beginning of all that now is.  here we learn about man's creation, his ultimate fall, and God's forming of a covenant with a single man who choose not only to believe Him, but to trust Him to accomplish all He promised.

john - "and the Word became flesh and dwelt among us." john 1:14 the book of john teaches us about the divine nature of Jesus.  “I am the bread of life” (john 6:35), “I am the light of the world” (john 8:12), “I am the good shepherd” (john 10:11), “I am the resurrection and the Life” (john 11:25), and “I am the way, the truth, and the life” (john 14:6).  He is the great "I AM."

romans - "there is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus." rom 8:1 in romans paul masterfully explains God.  it shows us what God is like, how He saves us, and how He wants us to live.  it shows that now gentiles too may be grafted in to the covenant God established for redemption.  and who could ever describe the beauty of all of chapter eight?

psalms - "how precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God!  how great is the sum of them!" psa 139:17 do you want to learn about prayer, about praise, about worry and joy unspeakable, turn in here.   the psalms teach us how to relate to God in all circumstances.  perhaps psalms has influenced me most profoundly. The words have become familiar. from the beauty of psa 139 to the consolation of psa 91.

ephesians - "that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish." eph 5:27 ephesians reminds us we are saved by grace through faith in Jesus Christ alone.  this book also covers topics helpful for christian living, like unity in the body of Christ, counsel for husbands, wives, and families, as well as how to engage in spiritual warfare so we can stand firm in our faith.

philippians - "that I may know Him and the power of His resurrection, and the fellowship of His sufferings, being conformed to His death." phil 3:10 philippians makes it plain that there are none worthy - no not one.  we are all on a quest; a magnificent quest.  to reach our goal of perfection in Christ will not be because we have earned it but because we have discovered the pearl of greatest price and sold all our possessions to obtain it.  forgetting those things that lay by the wayside we continually look up and press forward to the high calling.

james - "james, a bondservant of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ." james 1:1 james, the fleshly brother of our Lord.  how often i have pondered how difficult it was for him to believe Jesus was the Christ; after all, He's your sibling.  but come to the revelation he did, thank God.  i remember the practical wisdom james offers.  “the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere.” james 3:17  This short book challenges us to take practical steps towards acting out our faith, instead of just talking about it.

isaiah - "but He was wounded for our transgressions, He was bruised for our iniquities." isa 53:5 written about 700 years before Christ, isaiah foretells the coming of the Messiah, God’s anointed servant.  it gives several specific prophecies about Jesus: that he would come from david’s line, be born to a virgin, suffer for our transgressions, and rule eternally.  this book gives Jesus the names of “wonderful counselor,” “mighty God,” “everlasting Father,” and “Prince of Peace” isa 9:6   isaiah offers powerful words of encouragement and comfort, like these: “those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength.  they will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” isa 40:31

[andybondurant]

New Post has been published on Andy Bondurant

New Post has been published on https://andybondurant.com/2023/01/24/step-into-peace-be-set-free/

Step into peace. Be set free.

In the Gospel of Mark is a wonderful combination of stories. Mark 5 is one of my favorite chapters in the Bible, in which we find three stories of desperation. A man is desperate to be set free from demon possession. A woman is desperate to be healed from a twelve-year sickness. A father is desperate to see his daughter healed from a deadly fever.

2023: A Year of PEACE

This year, my Word of the Year is PEACE. So, as a note of warning, expect to read more than the expected posts on the subject of peace or shalom. Also, remember, desperation is a key to growing from your Word of the Year.

With this in mind, I want to focus on the middle story of Mark 5, the story of the sick woman. Jesus has just arrived from across the lake (where he set free the man from an army of demons), and he is on his way to the home of the little girl. On his way, Jesus stops because he feels healing power exit his body.

This woman, desperate for healing, believes if she can just touch the hem of Jesus’ robe, she will be healed. She’s right, and Jesus senses it. The disciples are incredulous — how could they know which person touched Jesus among the massive crowd pressing around him? Meekly, the woman presents herself to Jesus, and she explains to him her purpose and belief. This is Jesus response:

“And he said to her, “Daughter, your faith has made you well. Go in peace. Your suffering is over.””  -‭‭Mark‬ ‭5‬:‭34‬ ‭NLT‬‬

A Bible Study Tip

A great tip to understanding what we read in the Bible is to read a verse or passage in multiple different versions. I typically read the Bible in the New Living Translation (NLT). When I don’t understand something, or if I’m intrigued by a passage, I’ll read it in another translation. Here are a few of my go-to’s are: English Standard Version [ESV], The Message [MSG], New American Standard Bible [NASB], New King James Version [NKJV] and the New International Version [NIV]).

One version that I don’t often look at, but is a great translation, is the Amplified Bible (AMP or AMPC). The Amplified Bible is a translation that merges a word-for-word translation with a thought for thought translation. Most versions are thought-for-thought translations, because this is how most translation work is done. In most cases, there are a few different ways to translate a word or two within the general thought. Having the meaning of these different words give us more context for understanding.

Mark 5:34 is a great example of this. The intent of Jesus in the NLT version is clear – the faith of the woman is what healed her. Her belief that the power of Jesus was accessible through her faith was next level. Jesus was amazed. But reading it in the Amplified version, we see something deeper when Jesus says, “Go in peace. Your suffering is over.”

This is how the Amplified Bible translates Mark 5:34:

“And He said to her, Daughter, your faith (your trust and confidence in Me, springing from faith in God) has restored you to health. Go in (into) peace and be continually healed and freed from your [distressing bodily] disease.”   -‭‭Mark‬ ‭5‬:‭34‬ ‭AMPC‬‬

2 Thoughts on PEACE.

Again, let’s focus on the second half of Jesus’ statement. Here are two thoughts on PEACE.

1. Step INTO peace.

One of the practices I’ve added to my devotion routine this year is meditation. Meditation can mean many different things, so for me it means taking 5-10 minutes to quiet my mind and heart to focus on God. Since my 2023 Word of the Year is PEACE, I’ve been talking to God about experiencing his peace.

As I’ve read about and meditated on peace, it’s become clear to me that true peace is almost a physical presence. When I walk into a chaotic situation, if I have peace, then the peace enters into the room with me. I can bring peace into that chaos (or vice versa, the chaos can enter into my peace). Peace can almost be an aura that I take with me.

So when Jesus tells the woman to ‘go into peace’ it’s more than just telling her to walk away peaceful. Jesus tells her to enter into a new place of her life – as if she were walking into a new and different room. Peace can be something that comes onto you, but it is also something you can step into. Peace is a new and different environment for you to enter.

To experience true peace, you must choose to step into it. When you are in peace, then you can also take peace with you to the places you enter — both dark and bright.

2. Faith heals. Peace frees.

PTSD is real. Lots of different things in life can cause trauma. Most of us are familiar with PTSD from military combat, but we are also learning about people experiencing long-term trauma from bad relationships, financial difficulties, abuse of all kinds, and illness among others. 

This woman suffered from her illness for 12 years. We’re not exactly sure what her illness was — “constant bleeding” is how the NLT puts it. Maybe it was some kind of internal bleeding or an open wound that wouldn’t heal? Possibly it was as issue with her reproductive system? I’m guessing she experienced physical pain with this sickness. The poor woman endured twelve years of constant pain, shame, doctor appointments and failed treatment. There was a high possibility of her suffering from PTSD.

In the NLT, Jesus says, ‘Go in peace. Your suffering is over.” Again, the thought is consistent with what Jesus is communicating to the lady, but the deeper thought is stepping into God’s peace will be what truly frees her from the suffering she has experienced. It is peace that will free her from the future suffering she faced – shame, fear, anxiety. It was her faith that healed her from the illness, but it would be peace that would free her in the future.

Faith will heal you – physically, relationally, emotionally, spiritually. Peace will set you free from the shame, fear and anxiety that will try to follow you into your future. 

Step into peace. Be set free.

#Desperate #faith #freedom #God #Jesus #Mark #peace #Trauma #word of the year

[sing-backwards-and-weep]

i have very complex thoughts pertaining to the christian dogma that dominates american culture, so (speaking from my own personal experience), i kind of try to delineate it like this; there’s “God” in the way suburbanites understand him, and there’s “God” in the way the streets understand him

1) i got love for christian people - down in the gutters of the ghetto, everyone’s broke, all these houses are boarded up, i stop in a corner store to grab bus money and i can tell by a glance that the clerk behind the counter has constantly got to worry about getting shot on a daily basis - visibly muslim, the dude’s a brother in abraham, and he’s still out here every day trying to give back and get back to and from the community. that’s courageous, and that’s commendable

then i’m sitting waiting for my bus to roll by, and i see this black lady picking up trash, and i gotta tell her, right, because we’ve got similar goals in common - “ay, i really appreciate you for real, what you’re doing right here, cos that little bit goes a long way” - and she tells me that he son just died from covid, and i’m kinda caught up by that right, because how the fuck are you gonna walk up on me talking all cavalier about your son just died like it’s nothing?

and she tells me - “hey, it’s just a test from the lord. ain’t nobody said you weren’t never gonna be tested, right? i wake up every day and i know that by his grace i’ll be coming out on the other side of this alright.” and then, to paraphrase what she tells me, we get talking, and she tells me this - we all go through these ups and downs, these crises of faith that shake us to our core, and it’s a natural part of life. but just surviving is, in and of itself, an act of resistance. that strength becomes endurance, that endurance becomes perseverance, and that perseverance becomes the essence of faith.

we hug each other, promise to pray for each other, and leave better folks than we were before we met. that’s a kind of solidarity we share together in common that destroys the race barriers imposed on us by academics - and you mad we found it in jesus? grow up.

you learn to appreciate how proud these people are of their own faith. these folks got every reason on earth to be bitter, resentful, mad as fuck, vengeful, hateful, etc etc - and they’re not.

they believe inside themselves that there’s a purpose and a reason for their suffering, and that there’s a brighter day that waits to reward their strength, endurance, resilience, and perseverance - academics don’t appreciate the value of faith as a tool for survival because, very simply, nine times out of ten, they’ve never had to worry about survival.

so instead, they try to appeal to the aesthetic liberal sensibility of appearing alternative (without actually offering meaningful, sustainably, effective alternatives) by attacking what they see as “the status quo” by targeting christian people as intrinsically wicked and fearful, without the exposure to reality necessary to comprehend that when you destroy their god, you destroy the way of life that helps them stay optimistic in circumstances more hopeless and downtrodden than any aforementioned academic could imagine.

2) the church as a mainstream institution - in the way it interprets morality through a narrow, reductive lens, and try to override and overwrite what it is that “god’s love” actually constitutes. god’s love is founded principally in the comprehension of nuance, not dogmatic limitations and bad-faith misinterpretations deliberately imposed on you by some clergy dope.

it’s the same shit as a tarot reader blowing smoke up your ass to rake in a profit margin - anyone can abuse faith as a vehicle for getting paid or laid, and that’s all a cult is, really - preying on the spiritually destitute.

example: the christian god in an objective context would absolutely be pro-abortion, because this is the same god that will kill your family overnight for character development, so it’s not like he’s ~beyond the comprehension of nuance~ - to that effect, trying to reduce the magnanimity of his love to this black-and-white dichotomic morality is both blasphemous and traitorous against those devout in the faith

if your spirituality doesn’t include a respect for the people of abraham - jews, christians, muslims - you’re not a spiritualist, you’re a fucking iconoclast.

#fav #neat

[jdgo51]

DAILY DEVOTIONAL FOR JUNE 2, 2022

God Understands

By Enric Ainsa i Puig (Aragon, Spain)

READ JOHN 15:9-17

“God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”

JOHN 3:16 (NIV)

“A few months ago, my wife and I were at a restaurant with another couple, and we were able to talk with them about our faith. The wife told us that she did not have a relationship with God, and she did not want to have one because she had experienced the tragic deaths of her father and her brother in a car accident years ago. She did not understand how there could be a God, given the pain she and her mother felt from those losses. In that moment, I only knew to tell her that I could not imagine the pain they felt but that as a father of two children, I could perceive the depth of their loss.

Days later, during my prayer time, I kept asking myself, What answer could I give to that woman and her mother about who God is? I felt God telling me that God is not rigid and indifferent. God endures the pain and death of people much like we do. And I wished I could have explained that truth to the woman. Because to me, God’s act of love in sacrificing his son for our sins and the pain of that loss means that God understands and stands with us in our grief. And perhaps the experience of such a painful loss that woman and her mother suffered could help them understand our loving God more deeply.”  Horrible situations occur and we have to live through them, but God is always there to walk with us through it.  Giving us calm, peace and love.  

Enric Ainsa i Puig (Aragon, Spain)

TODAY'S PRAYER “God of love, help us to understand and remain deeply aware of your love for us so we can share your hope with those who are suffering. In your son Jesus’ name. Amen.”

John 15:9-17

“9 “As the Father loved me, I too have loved you. Remain in my love. 10 If you keep my commandments, you will remain in my love, just as I kept my Father’s commandments and remain in his love. 11 I have said these things to you so that my joy will be in you and your joy will be complete. 12 This is my commandment: love each other just as I have loved you. 13 No one has greater love than to give up one’s life for one’s friends. 14 You are my friends if you do what I command you. 15 I don’t call you servants any longer, because servants don’t know what their master is doing. Instead, I call you friends, because everything I heard from my Father I have made known to you. 16 You didn’t choose me, but I chose you and appointed you so that you could go and produce fruit and so that your fruit could last. As a result, whatever you ask the Father in my name, he will give you. 17 I give you these commandments so that you can love each other.”  All the blessings and love come to you.  Receive and live a wonderful and happy life.   Joe 

Unless otherwise indicated, scripture quotations are from the Common English Bib