#and i feel like i can only condemn it after the fact in the moment I feel powerless to stop those feelings

[shalpilot]

.

#okay. observations about my mental state. #well first off it is bad #second off i feel like every emotion i feel is it’s own piece of me #with no overlap #when I am miserable that’s all i am and it feels like there’s no respite from that #when i’m happy i’m manic and overly energetic and i cling to it bc i know eventually i’ll be back to being sad and depressed #and recent update. the anger patch #maybe i want to believe these are all different personas or whatever (NOT SAYING THAT!! being so clear right now i do not believe that #it’s just what the experience feels like.) #but yeah i don’t want to think that the person i am when i’m angry is me #because it’s such an awful bitter feeling #and like i know i’m allowed to be mad #and given the shit i’m putting up with i mean who wouldn’t be #but it makes me so fucking unpleasant and i can FEEL that #just that directionless anger #and i feel like i can only condemn it after the fact in the moment I feel powerless to stop those feelings #uggghhh #anyways art imitates life or whatever

[burst-of-iridescent]

What would change in the Zutara ship/dynamic and/or Zuko and Katara individually if Zuko didn't betray Katara in Ba Sing Se and immediately chose her?

i think most canon divergent zutara fanfictions get it right: they'd probably become close friends in no time, and develop a dynamic similar to what they have in the ember island players. but there's a reason this scenario is best left to fanon - as fun as it would be to see more zutara bonding in the first half of book three, there's always something lost for something gained, and in this case it would likely come at the cost of the depth and intimacy they developed in canon through the WAT and TSR arcs.

it is vitally important to their relationship development that katara gets to be deeply, righteously angry at zuko, and particularly that she goes on her field trip to find yon rha while they're still not on friendly terms. not only does her anger bar her from instinctually falling into a caretaking role with zuko as she does with most of the gaang at one point or another, allowing her to be cared for rather than being the carer, it also frees her from feeling like she needs to fit into any perceived image he might have of her. katara makes it clear to zuko that she owes him nothing - least of all her friendship, and everything that entails.

and it is this very lack of obligation that gives katara the freedom to be wholly and entirely herself. people always point to how katara behaves "uncharacteristically" in the southern raiders to prove that zuko is a bad influence, but the truth is that the way she acts in tsr is an inherent part of who she is. katara can be cold, furious and vengeful just as she can be warm, compassionate and friendly, and the fact that she can freely show both sides to zuko isn't because he's pushing her to be someone she's not, but because she has no need to live up to an idealised version of herself.

this would likely still apply to a degree in a no-betrayal au (tsr would happen in any version of book 3, just because it's so significant to katara's arc), but i find it probable that katara might be more hesitant about bringing zuko along, or less willing to bloodbend before him so readily. katara has to witness zuko's lowest point before she allows him to see hers. she has to take her dark-night-of-the-soul journey with someone she knows has neither the right nor the willingness to condemn her choices, in order to be able to focus entirely on herself and what she needs. very telling that she doesn't ask aang, her future husband, to go with her for support.

it's because zuko allows himself to be a whetstone for the blade of her fury, because he cares enough to find out why, because he tries to help when she's given him no reason to do so, because he stands shoulder-to-shoulder with her at her darkest, most conflicted hour without forcing her to bear the burden of caring what he thinks or feels about it, that katara is able to forgive and befriend him. it is because they see each other at their highest and lowest moments that they're able to have the deepest and most intimate relationship of anyone in the gaang. and none of that would've happened without the betrayal in ba sing se.

after all, love is brightest in the dark.

#zutara #zutara asks #zutara meta

[powdermelonkeg]

just saw ur gale/mystra analysis post. im new to the game and dnd lore and honestly… ur take on their relationship feels like the most natural/compelling one??? esp since its all too easy to simplify topics that have many facets and nuance….

thanks for sharing i love analysis and reading people’s takes on narratives : D

My pleasure! (Bee from the future here: congrats, you spawned another meta!)

I love complicated characters, WAY more than I like a clear cut-and-dry case. Flaws, to me, are what make a character compelling and lead to interesting stories about them with choices that can get them into situations. I'm both writing a fanfic and running a campaign where I'm playing as Gale, and in the interest of portraying him properly and in-character, I've gone into SUCH a deep dive into all the decisions and facts that make him him.

It helps to, y'know, also be in love with the fictional wizard, but I digress

The thing about Baldur's Gate 3 is that no character in there is perfect. I've seen a couple analyses about the theme of continuing cycles of abuse vs breaking out of them, but in my mind, in terms of the characters themselves, it goes like this:

The origin characters have just come out of the lowest situation of their lives (Lae'zel being the exception; being tadpoled is a gith's worst nightmare. You're seeing that lowest situation in real time).

Not the lowest point, mind. Gale's lowest was probably the day after he got the Orb. Wyll's was probably the day his father cast him out. Karlach's was the day she lost her heart. But the lowest, accepted normal for them is what they've just left.

They're then thrown out of their depth and forced to rely on you to live. That's #1 priority: living. We get the extremes of these characters before we get their nuances, because they're quite literally at their breaking points.

Then once we get to know them, we see their wants, their hopes, their fears, as they open up to us. Every companion's story is at their own pace, but they all have a moment where they ping-pong between despondency and desire. Sometimes that desire is what we know isn't good for them, like Shadowheart wanting to be a Dark Justiciar. Sometimes that despondency is only for a flicker, like Astarion's realization that he's condemned 7000 people to a half-life of tortured spawnhood for as long as he's been a vampire.

Romance lets us crack all that open more, because if you pursue a romantic partner, they see you as their closest confidant. They WANT to trust you, so they're more willing to explain how they see the world and what decisions they want to chase.

And then their endings. Those often get simplified as good/bad, continuing the cycle vs breaking away from it. But how is Duke Wyll on the same platform as Ascended Astarion? He's not evil, he's not even entirely unhappy. He might even have broken out of his abusive cycle with Mizora, if you played your cards right. And Ascended Astarion is overjoyed, even if he is remarkably more cold.

I think that the endings are less a dichotomy of "this is good for them" vs "this is bad for them," and more one of "bringing out their best traits" vs "bringing out their worst."

Wyll's worst trait is being willing to sacrifice his own wants for whatever people desire of him. His best is standing for what he believes in and ensuring people are safe. Duke Wyll leans into that necessity to turn the other cheek in the name of people who count on him, while the Blade of Avernus has seized that moral compass of his and forged it out of mithral.

Shadowheart's worst trait is blind obedience at the cost of her individuality, while her best is her desire to be kind to things that don't deserve to be hurt. Mother Superior Shadowheart's whole life is defined by Shar. Selûnite Shadowheart's life is defined by her hospitality, especially towards animals.

Karlach's worst trait is how willing she is to accept that things are (to quote her) fucked, letting despair override hope. Her best is her durability in the face of horror. Exploded Karlach would rather die than try to work out a solution in the Hells, because she's terrified of facing Zariel alone. Mindflayer Karlach has accepted her fate and decides to give up her heart and soul to go out a hero, losing who she is. Fury of Avernus Karlach is willing to keep fighting for a solution, and by the time the epilogue happens, she's got her sights set on one.

Astarion's worst trait is his desire for power over people. His best trait is using the tools he has to his advantage. Ascended Astarion has let his powerhungry nature and paranoia lead all of his decisions, with his sights set on dominating mankind. Spawn Astarion has embraced what he is, and carved out a life for himself where he can do as he pleases.

Lae'zel's worst trait is her blind fanaticism, while her best trait is her individual dedication, making her loyalty a marriage of the two. Ascended Lae'zel is a meal for the lich queen, turning a blind eye to all Vlaakith's tried to do to her and literally being consumed by her fervor. Champion of Orpheus Lae'zel has turned her loyalty into something productive for diplomacy. Faerûnian Lae'zel has seized her individuality by the throat and decided her own future.

And then Gale. Gale's worst traits are his hubris and, paradoxically, his low self worth. His best traits are his creativity and wonder for the world. God Gale is the embodiment of ambition, having burned away all but that in pursuit of perfection. Exploded Gale has let his remorse blot out all hope for a redemption in which he does not die, because he thinks he's earned it. Professor Gale leads his life by embracing the school of Illusion and letting his creativity thrive, teaching others to do the same. House Husband Gale has multiple creative projects he's working on, and Adventurer Gale is always finding new sights to see and wanting to share them with you.

There are arguments to be made on which ending the origins are happiest in, certainly, or which one benefits them the most, but each ending represents the extreme of a facet they possess.

So with all that, there's a sort of malleable method to figuring out the ins and outs of a character.

You take their endings—all of them, all variables they can have—and reverse-engineer the flaws and details they carry. Then you start to notice how those work into their approvals for minor things: Astarion approving of your taking of the Blood of Lathander, or Shadowheart approving of standing up for Arabella. Getting a list of approvals and disapprovals is helpful, but having those endings on hand tells you why they react like that to a majority of their decisions.

You take their romance-route explanations of how they act, and apply those to earlier decisions. Astarion's confession to manipulating you and Araj-prompted admittance to using himself as a tool brings to light how he reacts to your decisions, regardless of his actual opinions on them. Wyll's fairytale romance and love of poetic adages speaks to his idealistic nature, and why he takes a sometimes-blinded approach to decisions in which the "right" answer isn't always the smart one.

You take their beginning reactions to stress and use that to measure how future decisions impact them. Lae'zel locks down and gets snappy when she's scared, while Gale immediately turns to diplomacy. Shadowheart has gallows humor, while Wyll turns to quiet acceptance. If they break from these and seem even worse, you know the situation is more dire in their minds than having seven days to live.

And then you factor in all their fun facts and dialogue choices and backstories.

A wizard falls in love with a goddess and her magic, attempts to retrieve a piece of her power for her, is scorned for his attempt and is cursed to die.

Give that backstory to a Tav. Look at how it changes.

A chaotic good wizard fell in love with a goddess, thought retrieving a piece of power for her would be a showy bouquet of love, and was punished for not thinking things through.

A lawful evil wizard fell in love with a goddess's power, snatched the most precious thing she owned, tried to use it to barter his way through to the secrets she kept, and was given a swift retribution.

Same backstory. Same class, same act, same goddess. Wildly different connotations. Wildly different conclusions as to who is in the wrong.

If you take all there is to Gale, all that the game shows us makes up his character, and apply it to this backstory, you get what really happened:

A wizard, enamored with magic, fell in love with a goddess. His desires led him to want more than she was willing to give. In his well-buried fear of inadequacy, he concluded that the reason she wouldn't indulge his ambitions was because he just hadn't proven himself worthy enough. So he tried to prove himself, but he lacked the context for what he was proving himself with. And the goddess, seeing a weapon that had killed her predecessor, saw this ambitious wizard as losing his way and coming for her just like the weapon's creator had. She was angry, she withdrew his link to her, and he didn't know why. So he drew the conclusion that she took his powers to punish him, and let that encompass his fall from grace.

Was he wrong to reach for what was out there?

If you knew that the answers to everything you cared about were not only known, but kept by someone you loved—someone who adored you—what would you do to ask to see them? What if your curiosities were if there were other planets with life out there, or how dark matter worked, or whether or not we could one day travel in the stars? What if it was the potential cure to an illness that's little-understood, or the way to make a program you dreamt up, or the scope of the true limits of your artistic talents? Would your answer change?

Was she wrong to cut him off?

If you were once hurt, and the person you loved—the person who adored you—brought the thing that caused it to your door, believing you'd want it, how would you react to seeing it? What if that thing was someone you thought you'd broken contact with, like a friend or family member you'd been trying to avoid? Would your answer change?

That's the sort of scope that needs to be applied to this, on both sides. You have to take the perspectives of each party, and apply two analogies instead of one.

Gale saw the vastness of the universe, untold wonders, the solution to every question he could ever dream up, and saw Mystra as withholding this from him because she thought he just wasn't worthy enough. To claim Mystra knew his perspective does her a disservice.

Mystra saw a cruel weapon she thought long gone, in the hands of someone who could use it, brought right to her, and thought Gale was willingly following the path of Karsus. To claim Gale knew her perspective does him a disservice.

Should Gale have researched his prize more, so he knew just what he was obtaining? Should he have kept his hands off a cursed book that would devour him? Of course he should have.

Should he have given up on chasing his dreams?

Should Mystra have understood that Gale's pursuit of power was nothing like Karsus'? Should she have communicated when she was angry instead of giving the cold shoulder? Of course she should have.

Should she have given him the benefit of the doubt?

That's the root of their falling out. That's what leads to hurt being inflicted. Understandable, human reactions to the situations they perceive. Unhealthy, unwise choices made afterwards.

You work backwards from this to figure out their dynamic as Chosen and goddess. You work forward from this to understand more of where Gale and Mystra are during the events of Baldur's Gate 3. Gale reached too high, and understands this. His goddess hates him, and he regrets this. Mystra isolated Gale, and understands this. Her Chosen wants redemption, and she wants to make it happen.

Just like we took Gale's character into account, we also have to take Mystra's.

A goddess is faced with a problem. She uses someone who's desperate for approval to solve it, by telling him to kill himself.

An evil goddess is faced with a threat to her reign. She sees someone who's unfailingly loyal and hates himself, and elects to have him tear himself apart rather than do anything about it.

A good goddess is terrified of the future. She sees someone who tried to hurt her, who's going to die anyways, and tells him to use it to save the world.

Same story. Same act, same power, same pawn. Different character. Different perspective. Different outlook on whether or not this is the right thing to do.

Mystra has died, multiple times, to people trying to stake claim to her domain. Someone appears with the very thing that could do it again, right as she's regained her stability.

She does not see mortals the way mortals do. She is timeless. She is eternal. She has a duty to protect billions of people, and one person lost to protect that number is more than worth the sacrifice.

People like to bring up the Seven Sisters as proof of Mystra's cruelty. For those unaware, Mystra asked permission to, then possessed, a woman, used her to court a man (with dubious consent from the woman), and bore seven children, all of whom were capable of bearing Mystra's power as Chosen without dying. The woman she possessed was killed in the process (reduced to no more than a husk, then slain by her now-husband, hoping to end her suffering), and the husband was horrified by the whole story.

Mystra needed Chosen in order to restore herself in the event that she was killed again, to prevent magic as a whole from collapsing and wreaking havoc on the mortal realm, like it had in the few seconds Mystryl had been dead. Elminster, Khelben Blackstaff, and the Seven Sisters contributed to this. The more Chosen she has, the better; what happens if Elminster dies? She can't afford to have all her eggs in one basket.

Mystra has Volo (yeah, that Volo) as a Weave Anchor, imparted with a portion of her power to prevent the Weave from shredding itself to pieces in her absence. All Chosen of Mystra are Weave Anchors by nature. The creation of Weave Anchors was mandated by Ao, the Overgod, and Chosen are the best way to make sure those anchors aren't drained by ambitious people hoping for godlike power. Chosen can, and will, defend themselves, unlike static locations (which Mystra also has). The anchors are why the Weave wasn't completely obliterated during Mystra's last death, when the Spellplague rose up, because they stabilized the Weave around them.

Everything Mystra does is in the name of the big picture, to prevent a catastrophe like the fall of Netheril from happening again. Her restriction of magic, her numerous Chosen, her creation of Weave Anchors, her destruction of those who would claim her power, it's all in the name of the stability she's been charged with. Dornal Silverhand's grief and Elué Silverhand's death, while regrettable, were worth it to bring seven more anchors into existence to save all of the Material.

So someone appears with the Crown of Karsus, potentially powerful enough to try to kill the other gods in the name of the Dead Three. She can't risk being a target of them. She can't risk the destruction of magic again.

Gale is going to die. He lives in fear. He begs for forgiveness.

In Mystra's eyes, she's offering him the best outcome. She'll let him die in service to her, to save Faerûn, and she'll forgive him. He's going to die anyways, and if he does this, she'll give him everything (she thinks) he could ever want in her realm. She's asking him to do what (she thinks) is the right thing.

"She would consider what she considers to be forgiveness."

Notably, she leaves the decision in his hands. She doesn't have Elminster lead him to the Nether Brain. She doesn't activate him as soon as he's there. When he lives yet, she doesn't revoke the charm that keeps him stable. And when he declines, when he lets it go and starts pursuing Karsus' path, she doesn't smite him on the spot.

She is (she thinks) being incredibly patient. If Gale is going to try to be Karsus II, she's ready for him. If he decides to walk off and keep the Orb, he's dug his own grave in the Fugue Plane (those who don't have a god to claim them roam endlessly as husks and form a wall of bodies around the City of Judgement).

From her perspective, she's not being unreasonable. But from the perspective of a mortal, she absolutely is.

"Now, I have a question for thee: what is the worth of a single mortal's life?"

This is a question she cannot answer properly.

I think a lot of characterization is lost whenever someone paints one of them as being totally in the right. But I also think you have to be invested in them as characters to want to see that characterization. If you want to write about Mystra, you have to try to get into her head, analyze the decisions she made, figure out why she thinks she was right, and follow the pattern.

Gale's sacrifice is a very predictable thing for her to ask for.

#bg3 #gale dekarios #gale of waterdeep #mystra #long post #like really long post holy hells #did not expect this to go on for this long #swearing tw #< for karlach #oh yeah #astarion #karlach #wyll ravengard #shadowheart #lae'zel #ask bee

[awearywritersworld]

late nights and possibilities

gojo satoru x reader summary: a late night run in with the man you thought you hated changes your perception of him entirely w/c: 1.4k tags/warnings: smidge of angst to fluff, smoochin, mentions of trouble sleeping, it's implied that you're a teacher too, gn!reader, platonic!nanami, no use of y/n a/n: no manga spoilers, but all the angst floating around threatened to crush my barely beating heart, so i have crawled out of my hole to write this. masterlist check out my latest work for gojo here

"i can't stand him, ken," you groan at your friend for what is probably the thousandth time.

he's situated in the arm chair in your apartment, while you're sprawled across the couch.

"mhm," he hums along, his eyes never leaving the book in his lap.

"i'm serious. the next smart ass comment he makes, i'm going to grab him by the neck and-" you make a violent gesture in the space in front of you, huffing frustratedly.

nanami snorts, equally amused and bewildered. they were obvious to him, the repressed feelings shared between you and gojo satoru. in fact, everyone at jujutsu tech was privy to it, save for the pair of you.

it's only when you continue complaining that he finally closes his book, leaning forward to regard you with raised eyebrows.

"are you alright? you only gripe like this if something is really bothering you."

your mouth falls open. "i'm not griping. it's a simple matter of truthful observation."

"yeah, yeah. whatever you say. you're still avoiding the question."

you sigh. "i'm fine. haven't slept well the past few nights is all."

he settles back into the chair, and if you knew him any less, you would have missed the concern that flickers across his features. "any reason why?"

you wave your hand dismissively. "not really, just kinda happens sometimes. it'll pass soon enough." a stifled yawn marks your apparent disinterest in the matter.

he accepts your answer, though not without mumbling something about your habit of drinking caffeine in the evening, then returns to his book.

as you lay in bed that night, you roll your eyes while thinking back on the conversation. you hadn't one bit of caffeine since the morning, yet you're still condemned to consciousness as the hours grow late.

no matter how tightly you pull the blankets around yourself, you can't get warm enough. and no matter how frequently you adjust your pillows, you can't get comfortable enough.

with a defeated sigh, you eventually throw the covers back, crawling out of bed with the hope that a warm cup of tea and the fireplace in the staff lounge might be able to lull you to sleep.

your feet drag with each step you take and you find yourself thankful it's not too far from your room. rubbing at your eyes, you slide the door open and though you sense another presence, your bleary vision keeps you from seeing them clearly.

once he calls out your name, however, you consider sliding the door shut and resigning yourself to yet another sleepless night. "what are you doing awake? it's two in the morning."

you don't process the uncharacteristic softness of his tone, your response tumbling out of your mouth without much thought. "thanks, big ben. i hadn't noticed."

by now your vision had returned to normal and you see him standing a few meters away, eyeing your obvious hesitation as you stand in the doorway.

you're caught off guard by his worn out appearance, as it's seldom he's anything less than irritatingly chipper.

"sorry," you begin. "i should go back to my room."

"you can stay, if you want." he scratches the back of his neck, his eyes flickering toward the kettle whirring off to the side, apparently sharing in your desire for some tea. "there's enough water for two cups."

"okay," you agree after a moment, though it comes out so quietly you're unsure if he could even hear it.

padding over to the couch in front of the fireplace, you're pleased to find that it's already lit, the soft light from the flames flickering across the walls in a soothing way.

it's not long before he joins you, sitting just a foot or two away and passing you the tea he'd prepared. you can't help but notice how small his cup looks in his hands.

"thanks," you murmur.

it's silent after that, the only sound in the room coming from the crackling of the wood. you briefly entertain a vague notion about how odd it is for the man to be so subdued.

gojo keeps glancing at you from the corner of his eye, observing how the flames dance in your own. you fail to notice.

"i haven't poisoned it, you know," he eventually says.

you jump a little, having spaced out, and look to him before your gaze shifts to your tea. the reassurance makes you narrow your eyes in (mostly) feigned suspicion.

"oh for gods sake." he pulls it from your grasp, taking a sip of it before shoving it back into your hands.

you're not sure what possesses you, but you let out a small giggle at the action. he follows suit, a breathy chuckle passing his lips.

maybe it's the lateness of the hour, or perhaps a touch of sleepy glibness, but easy conversation falls between the two of you after that. he asks you about your latest mission with yuuji, then tells you about a new mochi shop he recently discovered, suggesting that you tag along next time he goes.

the fire isn't nearly as lively now and your tea is long gone, so you reach for a blanket, unfolding it before situating yourself beneath it.

"are you just going to leave me out here all alone in the cold? c'mon now, that's just cruel."

a furious warmth creeps across your cheeks, a small smile tugging at your lips. god, you really are sleep deprived.

"careful," you warn, spreading the blanket over his lap as well. "some people might interpret that as flirting."

"hm, only some? i'll have to work on being less subtle, then." his arm moves to the back of the couch, resting behind your head.

you turn to face him despite the fact that your face now feels even hotter than the dying fire, and for once, you can't seem to think up a witty comeback for the shameless sorcerer.

he thinks the look on your face is just too cute.

then, without any deliberation— as if he had meant to do it all along— he leans forward and kisses you. it's fleeting. so quick, in fact, that if it weren't for the shit eating grin on his face, you'd be questioning whether it happened at all.

ohhhh. you must have fallen asleep at some point and while you're happy to finally get some rest, you could have done without this very strange dream.

"it's not often i see you speechless, sweetheart."

however, when his hand brushes your hair behind your ear, then rests comfortably against your cheek, the goosebumps that spread down your limbs feel very real, indeed. it's the sound of your name falling from his lips that finally grounds you in reality.

the grin is gone from his face, replaced now by a soft, lazy smile. "can i kiss you again?"

you glance down at his lips before nodding almost imperceptibly. "yes."

his mouth finds yours once more and this time, you're struck by how gently his lips press against your own. you hardly notice his hand moving to the back of your neck, the other toward your hip hoping to pull you closer. you're too caught up in how sweet he tastes.

it's a miserable sort of ecstasy, really. the way he feels against you isn't like anything you've ever experienced and it forces you to come to terms with feelings you've spent the last few years trying to deny.

when he pulls away, his expression is one of warm contentment. "can't tell you how long i've been wanting to do that."

"me too," you admit, feeling less shy.

and just like that, you're both back to your easy conversation. you don't know who finds sleep first, or what time it finally happens, but it's a deep and dreamless slumber you fall into...

nanami (who spends a considerable amount of time in the staff lounge for someone who insists he isn't a teacher, but that's beside the point) stumbles upon the two of you the next morning. your head is resting against gojo's chest, your hand on his stomach. his arm is wrapped around you securely and you're both still sleeping soundly beneath the blanket.

the blonde turns around, shutting the door behind him quietly, before venturing off to collect a well earned fifty yen from utahime.

#m!writes #gojo #gojo x reader #gojo imagines #gojo fluff #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen imagines #jujutsu kaisen fluff #jjk #jjk x reader #jjk imagines #jjk fluff #gojo satoru #gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru imagines #gojo satoru fluff

[br-disaster]

Nie Mingjue's Fatal Journey crying scenes appreciation post

There's no way I wouldn't make this post, but it ended up way longer than I intended.

Fighting with Huaisang

When is this man not tearing up?

This fight is so important for Huaisang's character development and the movie's themes, with Huaisang being ready to challenge and question the Nie ways and Mingjue doing his best to uphold those traditions and keep the peace through the only way he knows how.

But it's still hard to be challenged like this and to face the possibility that everything you've ever known might not be right, actually.

And this gif specifically is from the moment Huaisang questions if Mingjue even knows what they're there to fight and what this supposed great evil that will come to Qinghe if they fail to balance their blades even is. Mingjue has no answer, of course, I suppose he was only taught this and never had reason to question it.

But Huaisang is also talking about the disciples they already 'lost' at this point of the movie, and he says something along the lines of " You don't know anything, you only know how to bring them here to die" and that does it. Because it's both "you can't follow these rules blindly when they rely on sacrificing people" and "you've changed and I don't trust your judgement on these matters anymore".

And as he says it, Mingjue looks at their disciples and he sees the puppets for a moment. And Huaisang just questioned if the other disciples were really attacked by puppets.

So that's a big moment and Huaisang is right, of course, but he doesn't have a confirmation that this is the result of Mingjue's health deterioration yet, so he keeps pushing. And Mingjue doesn't really have a counter argument because he knows what's going on with him, but it must be very scary to hear it from the person you care about the most and realize just how much you're being affected.

(Actually, Mingjue has one counter argument and that is "Well, I am at least trying to do something while you're painting and living a carefree life", and he's not wrong either. Huaisang is right and rightfully harsh, but this is the first time he's being confronted with these difficult choices and all their family history. He can reflect on and question it, but his brother has been meking those hard decisions since he was 14, when did he ever had a break to question and change things?)

Which leads us to

The Talk

After seeing his brother sacrifice himself for him at the bridge, and then seeing Mingjue be so vulnerable and lost, that anger from their fight is gone. They can meet in the middle with "You are right, I wasn't thinking straight, this is not a long term solution and I've failed at changing our ways" and "It's not your fault, you did everything you could but you're not responsible for this situation" and it's very beautiful and heartbreaking.

Mingjue is so remorseful, both because he has condemned Huaisang to die with him and because he feels like he failed everyone and everything (even if he doesn't seem to know what he could have done differently to avoid all this).

And Huaisang's reaction in this scene is so calm it made me think this Huaisang is somewhat used to his brother displaying vulnerability around him. This isn't book NMJ with all his victories, this isn't a man who never let the Unclean Realm be conquered and who could afford to keep Huaisang far away from the war. This is a man who was attacked and subdued in his own home, who had to send Huaisang to the hands of the people who killed their father.

This Huaisang doesn't have reasons to see Mingjue as this unmovable force, he has seen Mingjue hurt and threatened and fearful; and he's now seeing him remorseful and defeated.

(I'm sure Mingjue telling Huaisang about the fact that he's dying and admiting his mistakes and insecurities is something new, especially considering their previous fight, but this Huaisang doesn't take it as a shock, because he knows his brother is only human and there's only so much he can handle. He even, like, explicitly says this)

And so he assumes this calm, reassuring and empathetic posture, because that's what his brother is asking for. And it's the most beautiful thing, Huaisang has so much love for him, so much empathy. And this is Mingjue's reaction to his brother's reassurance that it's okay if they have to die there:

I'm sure Huaisang is still processing Mingjue's "I only forced you to practice because I'll die soon", but he's so good at reassuring his brother.

Because Mingjue just told him "I am dying and I'll go as a failure" and Huaisang insisted "None of this is your fault and you did everything you could and more, and if I have to die here with you today, I don't regret a thing, and you shouldn't either".

There's no despair or anger that his brother is only telling him this now, there's only understanding and acceptance and so much love and they really knew what they were doing with this movie.

His people love him

Mingjue is so moved. He just admitted to Huaisang that he's not in peace with his accomplishments, or lack thereof; that he feels ashamed to face his ancestors, having done so little.

So I truly believe Mingjue doesn't consider himself worthy of this much trust and support. (And I can't ignore how this is tied to the Nightless City situation, where he led the men who trusted him with their lives to a dangerous situation and couldn't save any of them).

As we see in the confrontation at Jinlintai, that technically happens after this movie, that is still a very sensitive topic.

And here he has his loyal disciples saying they will follow him yet again, despite his previous 'failures'; just like Huaisang was ready to die with him. They have so much trust in him, and the way he's nodding a little here, just like he was nodding when Huaisang reminded him of everything he's done for their sect since their father died, is like he's convincing himself of it. That he can do this and he can do this right this time.

And yet

He fails again. And I don't even think he knows it was him who killed those disciples, like some people say. He doesn't need to because it doesn't matter. His men, who followed him till the end of the world, are dead again. And so is the hope he had of doing this one right thing before he dies.

Yes, he supressed the saber spirit like he had to, but they're still dead, all of them.

He falls apart, how could he not?

At some point I'm sure Huaisang his holding all his weight because he just gives up. There's only so much loss one can handle and that's way too much.

And look at the way Huaisang is watching him as he realizes something inside Mingjue shattered forever.

There's so much pain in this scene, it looks physically taxing and I hope people gave Wang Yizhou a break after he shot this. I know it's his job and he's phenomenal at it, but this has to mess with your head a little.

And hey, it's a Huaisang crying scene as well. CQL Huaisang only really cries twice. First he watches his brother have a mental breakdown in his arms after unknowingly killing his own disciples; and then as he watches his brother qi deviate and die, while unable to do anything to either stop or comfort him.

(And a lot of people said there's no hesitation on Huaisang's part when he rushes to his brother's aid when Mingjue is hurt on this post's notes, and that's true for book Huaisang too, because he runs towards Mingjue as he is qi deviating, gets hurt in the process, and still keeps calling for him, which makes CQL's decision to have JGY holding him back kind of cruel, tbh, there's not a Huaisang who would run from a hurting Mingjue regardless of the risks

But at least we have this scene.)

And that's it, I guess. There's nothing uplifting to say about this, really. He just went through a lot and kept shouldering everything until he couldn't anymore. I just wish book NMJ had gotten to receive the same love and comfort and acceptance from NHS before he died, I wish he had been able to tell his brother what was actually happening, but thats kind of the purpose of this movie, so I'm just very grateful that it exists.

It's like that post says, it didn't change anything but the love was there, you know? That's how this movie feels for me.

#nie mingjue #nie huaisang #fatal journey #cql #long post #now this is meta with gifs #sorry i can't even attempt to joke a little about this movie everything is just sad from start to finish #the gifs might look worse than the ones on the other post and that's me not knowing how to deal with fatal journey being so dark and green #that talk they have feels kind of like an absolution for nmj doesn't it #book nmj deserved that too #oh yes we have two tearing up scenes #one crying scene #and one bawling his eyes out scene #on a movie that is less than 1 hour and a half long so he's crying the entire time; really

[revel-inbluehues]

This is very much an essay. Consider this my praise for s2ep9. I'll fangirl in another post.

Xie Lian acknowledged that he's never seen Hua Cheng angry, but he approached him without any fear or worry. Even after he was unexpectedly paralysed, he still didn't doubt the fact that HC would never hurt. While he was confused and nervous, he still trusted HC with his life, despite having been out into a paralysis, and doesn't doubt HC's intentions for even a second.

Hua Cheng is angrier than we've ever seen him. He wasn't fazed at all by anything in season 1 except when XL mentioned being hurt or was hurt. He had, in the previous episodes, watched as the love of his existence discredit himself and hold back his tears. Even earlier, HC had accidently hurt him. Now, he gets to vent the anger at himself for his helplessness, anger at the Lang Qianqiu for his ignorance and anger at Qi Rong for his schemes. He is angry and one of the many people who hurt and mocked XL was in front of him. With every insult against XL, HC only gets angrier.

For the next part, I'd like to mention that LQQ in his daruma form is adorable and I laughed when he jumped out like a pokeball.

Onto the more serious look, LQQ is angry as well, but a lot more confused and the donghua team did a great job at expressing. He shifted between denial, confusion, reassurance and anger as he battles the words between XL and QR, and the donghua team did brilliantly to express this. The music was appropriately dramatic. It feels sharp, more like battle music, and paused and played at the right moments to increase the drama. He'd rather trust the man he thinks murdered his whole family rather than face the possibility that he condemned the wrong person and he lived a large portion of his life based on a lie, hating a person who might not have deserved and letting the men who did commit the murder get away with it (to some extent). Even Prince Anle was honoured as a friend of the king in death rather than a traitor to the nation.

Speaking of XL's words to LQQ, the fact that he yelled against QR's words the moment he could talk was a testament to his nerves and desperation and a shock to both LQQ and QR. It is an absolutely absurd situation from LQQ's view. He's watching a man argue that he was the guilty party behind the murders when normally, people would be trying to blame each other and prove themselves innocent. It's very obvious the XL is hiding something but LQQ chooses not to chase the answers and settles with XL's story because if it isn't true, then he would have to reevaluate the past few centuries and face the reality that his personal feelings blinded him to the facts, not that anyone can quite blame him for it. Meanwhile, Qi Rong is shocked because, from his view, a random man showed up and called him a liar, despite him very much telling the truth, or what he believes to be the truth.

When Xie Lian is talking about his second demotion, I love how they cut to HC, softer now that he was looking XL. HC knows exactly why his 'heart was uncertain' but he is also clearly hoping that part of it was because XL missed Wu Ming and he mourned him. The implications is something that novel readers can see and cry about; XL's second shackle was his own punishment for getting Wu Ming killed and it was sign that he did care for Wu Ming, the nameless ghost, his last believer. However, HC doesn't know that. He can only hope that he occupied a modicum of XL's heart but never think of asking because he's afraid of the answer. His love may be unconditional, but rejection would hurt and meaning nothing to XL would be a painful existence for him. In a single frame, I see the love, hope and adoration that HC has for XL.

There are a lot of good Hualian scenes in this episode. There is a lot more casual touches, where Xie Lian is trying to calm HC down and HC is too angry to be panicking about it. The irony is absolutely not lost when QR asks about who'd worship XL and make statues of him while HC, XL's most devoted follower who carved thousands of statues of him, was standing right there.

XL takes every one of QR's insults with a smile because he genuinely isn't offended. It's hard to be insulted by children's jabs after everything he went through. To him, it isn't a big deal, while HC was only getting progressively angrier at QR for insulting him. The moment QR insulted HC, however, was when XL instantly turned to violence, striking before he could fully finish. It wasn't that big of an insult, calling HC blind, but it was enough of a transgression that XL slapped him like a fly. To XL, HC quickly became someone he cared for, respected and wanted by his side, for what was probably the first time in forever. It only makes sense for XL to be viciously protective of the first person that he cared for on a personal level rather than 'the world should be protected' stance. Meanwhile, HC was genuinely surprised by XL's actions. While he would protect XL against everything, he was never expecting that protection returned but HC, in his insecurity and devotion, does not fully understand the fact that, while true devotion can be one-sided, true love can't be. XL does care deeply for HC, a fact that he hasn't comprehended yet.

Even when Hua Cheng blocks Feng Xin with E-Ming, he is extremely gentle. He knows that all of this is going to hurt XL but it needed to happen and Hua Cheng was there to catch. It was also fascinating to see Lang Qianqiu realise that he won't be able to stop Xie Lian from killing Qi Rong if it came down to it and there was a true worry that he might never find out the truth if Xie Lian got through him. On the other hand, Xie Lian was truly desperate; this was a secret he buried, and faced 100 years in a coffin to ensure that it stayed buried. Now, without much of a warning, all of it was coming out and Xie Lian is panicking.

One of my favourite parts in this episode is Qi Rong himself. His voice actor did a brilliant job at portraying the wild, manic and immature personality of Qi Rong. He is somewhat intelligent; you can't survive 800 years without some serious planning, and he did plot the gilded banquet along with other skirmishes everywhere else. However, he is childish and arrogant in a way that the other ghosts aren't. He's powerful enough to stand above other ghosts and too weak to stand as equals with the calamities, so despite his attempt to escape his mediocrity compared to certain others (e.g., Xie Lian and Hua Cheng) failed. His immaturity shines through in the animation. He is the most animated and restless character so far, moving constantly and expressing himself in his limbs a lot more than others. It makes him feel a lot less composed than the others, and his actions cement that. He crawls around, he holds his knees, and he gets red in the face when people don't respond to his riling. It gives a much more maniachal yet silly vision of him. While it doesn't make him a completely terrifying presence like White No-Face, he does make people weary with his antics. He is definitely one of the characters that I hate as people but love as character. I think Qi Rong was the part where the entire donghua team truly and absolutely outdid themselves, even though I do think they do an amazing job every day.

#heaven official's blessing #tgcf donghua #tgcf season 2 #tgcf #hua cheng #mxtx tgcf #tgcf spoilers #xie lian #heaven's official blessing #tian guan ci fu #san lang #lang qianqiu #qi rong #night touring green lantern #crimson rain sought flower #four great calamities

[calmcoldevening]

Bo Sinclair NSFW ALPHABET

Tw: no minors, nsfw

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Even though Bo is selfish, he will try to do something for you after sex: a glass of water, wet towels, food, and so on. If Sinclair is in a good mood, he may well pick you up and carry you to the bathroom, where you can soak in hot water with floral foam and various bath bombs. If Bo is still full of energy, and this happens most of the time when he is satisfied, not annoyed by the tantrums of the victims, he will make you coffee, and you can sit and chat in the kitchen together, if that's what you want, of course.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

He likes your hips. Despite the fact that he sometimes jokes about it, he really likes them. Bo likes to lie on your lap; kiss your skin there during sex, sometimes even biting and leaving characteristic marks. Sinclair really likes the soft skin of your thighs, so he often takes you in his arms to touch you once again, no matter how strange it looks. He also likes your shoulders. Get ready, most of the time they will be covered with a lot of hickeys and tooth marks. Bo will purposely leave marks in places that your favorite clothes won't hide, and then walk around and grin when you try to cover them up with a foundation; although why would you shackle them, after all, you don't go beyond Ambrose, and the brothers are already used to it. But he just grunts and shrugs at it.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Bo uses condoms. The man himself is not ready for children yet, and knowing your uncertainty and vague position on this issue, he decides to avoid a possible pregnancy as much as possible. Besides, with your appearance, he learned a lot about sexual diseases and decided that he wanted to protect you from it as much as possible. Therefore, his opinion on the use of condoms is indisputable.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Bo wouldn't mind your dominance. He has never thought about it seriously enough to propose to you, after all, he does not want to lose the image of the "leader" in your eyes, he, like a little boy, is afraid of condemnation on this score. But if you had suggested it yourself, he would have agreed, of course, creating the appearance of his imaginary protest, but supposedly putting up with his inevitable fate.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Average. In particular, in high school and at the age of 25, Bo actively flirted with girls, so it came to sex. In addition, he has a large collection of magazines (which, of course, you forced him to throw away), most of which are issues of playboy. This man basically grew up in the absence of the Internet, instead of which there were DVDs and cassettes that he stole from friends as a teenager.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

69. Missionary position

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

He is quite serious in your sessions. After all, one of his primary tasks is to please you, not just himself. He knows about your periodic depressive phases and attitude towards yourself, so he tries in every possible way to give you attention and care, in particular during sex. Probably, it is during intimacy with you that he is more serious than ever, because you are his first and only relationship, whereas before it was fleeting connections in clubs and bars. He is very responsible about your condition and tries in every possible way to prove it and, if possible, to control it, because he knows about your negligence towards himself.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He takes good care of himself so that you don’t feel any discomfort.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

He's gentle enough when compared to his seasoned detachment during the day. Bo is not trying to fuck you faster and go to bed, for him this moment is a manifestation of love and affection, so he will be attentive and sensual. Bo will constantly ask if you're okay, hug, kiss and show you love in every possible way. Maybe he will even omit some puns and funny compliments to casually make you smile. This man is quite fickle, so you don't know what to expect from him in the next second. You can be ready for anything.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

He doesn't masturbate very often just because you have sex if he wants to, with your consent of course. But sometimes, for example, if you are not in the mood or you are simply not at home, he can afford to masturbate. He has a good enough imagination to imagine you next to him. And yet, unlike masturbation, he prefers real sex.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

He likes it when you pay attention to his chest. Kiss him, bite him, paw him and pull his nipples off — he likes it like hell.

Hair. If you take control, Bo likes it when you pull his hair at the back of his head during orgasm. It gives him a sense of your dominance at the moment.

Holding hands. When he takes a dominant role in your intimacy, Bo likes to feel in control of you. To do this, it is enough for him to hold your wrists clamped in the palm of his hand above your head. A man tries not to make you uncomfortable in this, so if he gets carried away and you suddenly feel uncomfortable, you can always use a safe word.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

In general, Bo doesn't care where to do it with you. If he wants to, he will offer it to you regardless of the environment. But if you had asked where he likes to have sex the most, Bo would probably have replied that he was comfortable at his gas station. After all, he spends most of his time there, and it can be said that it has already become his kind of lair. Therefore, at any opportunity that arises, he will certainly take you there.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Bo gets turned on by your emotions. He likes it when you react to his jokes, compliments and caustic comments; when you take the initiative and start flirting with him, or vice versa, pretend that you don't care about him, and Sinclair needs to get your attention. Any violent reaction you have makes him want more, and, as he knows, your greatest emotion is euphoria during orgasm.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Bo would categorically refuse to blindfold both you and him. First of all, he wants to control the situation one way or another, and Bo wouldn't want to hurt you because he just didn't see it. And secondly, Bo likes to watch your reaction. No matter how hard you try to restrain sounds or control your face, he will be able to partially see your emotions through your eyes, and then take advantage of this and bring you to a peak so that you go crazy.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Obviously, but prefers to receive. He likes not so much the feeling of your blowjob, but watching your own emotions and trying to do everything well. Bo especially likes it when you kneel in front of him. This betrays him some sense of power and dominance in the relationship, although, often, this is far from the case.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Bo is quite fickle in this matter. He starts, of course, gently and slowly, giving you the opportunity to get used to it and, perhaps, adjust the further pace yourself, but, one way or another, in the end he will take over and be more tough and rude, trying to please himself as quickly as possible. Although he soon realizes that this is not some kind of rape or senseless fuck, and slows down his ardor, taking into account your emotions. Although sometimes he is gentle from the beginning to the very end. This is quite rare, given his rapid mood swings, and often it just happens spontaneously, of course, so he doesn't have much control over it.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

A few times a week is more than enough. Sinclair has an average libido, so very often he does not need it. In that case, he would feel more tired and exhausted. But if you offer to do it yourself, he, of course, will not object, knowing your bad character in this matter (you just won't give it to him later, it's more expensive for yourself).

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Bo is always ready to experiment, if they do not go beyond reason. Any sex toys, any new poses and techniques are widely welcomed. But not too often. He may get tired and prefer classic intimacy without outside interference and newfangled tricks. Although later you will joke about him that Bo is an old, boring grandfather who is just afraid of modern youth, which will hit his ego hard.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

In general, Bo can withstand two, and sometimes three medium runs — it all depends on the degree of his fatigue. Although, if he's been lying on the couch all day, he can go up to four rounds at a time. Usually, each of them is accompanied by the use of a new interesting thing for sex that you bought during your last trip to the city.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Yes, he does. Both on him and on you. Bo prefers to use handcuffs and wax candles for bdsm practices on himself, a little less often vibrators, while he is ready to try anything on you if you suggest it yourself. Although, if you give this old man the Internet, he will order everything himself with teenage enthusiasm.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Oh, he really likes it. This is literally the whole Bo. Whether it's body caressing or burning jokes, he will try anything to make you lose your temper. That burning devil fire in your eyes turns him on like hell, making him want it more and more. Therefore, be ready to spend all the nerves remaining after a hard day on this egoist.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

If Bo takes on a dominant role, he's quiet enough, you can only hear the faintest of shallow growls and grunts. But if you become the asset in the session, Bo acts a little differently. At first, he will tightly control himself to restrain any sounds coming from him, deliberately teasing you in this way. But then, when it gets damn difficult, he starts making shameless and dirty sounds that would be the envy of users of black and orange YouTube. He will whine, beg you to do this or that action, or just moan loudly, writhing under your body.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Bo would like to try role-playing games with you. He's seen enough of this kind of stuff on old cassettes and in some playboy releases, so now he really wants to try it in reality. All these costumes, funny nicknames and interesting scenes make him grin and his ears turn red.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

7 inches. The golden mean. Not thick, and not thin, enough to please you.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Strong enough. He considers literally any of your activities and location for sex. Kitchen, bedroom, gas station. It doesn't matter if you're cooking, cleaning, or just lying on the couch, he'll try to take advantage of your position now. Just believe it.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Bo passes out very quickly after sex. In principle, he falls asleep quickly, but especially when he is exhausted. Literally, his head should touch the pillow, and after a good five minutes he is already snoring, sleeping soundly. You manage to fall asleep a little later. Sometimes his loud snoring gives you a headache in the morning and you arrive in a bad mood. The whole house is literally in tension, and all the household members try not to make unnecessary sounds. Except for Bo, of course. He doesn't care too much about it.

#slashers x reader #bo sinclair imagine #bo sinclair #bo sinclair x you #bo sinclair x reader #house of wax

[sillypiratelife]

Kuina is probably my favorite female character of One Piece, but that's because she represents just perfectly the experience of being a little girl that's into martial arts— and some other stuff.

Kuina would never be enough because she could not be man enough to inherit the dojo, according to her dad, but she was also not lady-like enough to be considered a "woman". To the eyes of other people (and what they make her believe), Kuina's dream marked her as an eternal outcast, someone who would never reach one shore or the other.

To Kuina, her body was a cage. Even if she had everything within her, her body would make her naturally weaker. Similar to being condemned to fight with a bad sword, a blade that would break. Being a child was safe. Little boys and little girls are equals. Growing up meant losing time, losing ground. Every year must have to be a burden to her, with the constant reminder that her time as the best was running out.

The fear and hatred of puberty, the horror of the way your body changes without your permission, the experience of girls who feel uncomfortable in her bodies because they don't want breasts, they don't want to be weaker once a month because their bodies are bleeding and their hormones are ruining everything— I've seen it all.

Worst even, the way people would stare at those bodies and lust for them. The trauma of being desirable. Now they think that they're entitled to your body, that they can disrespect you. You're a toy, an object, you're a woman so you're weak and fragile, you're a woman so give up, you're not in control of the situation anymore.

When Koushiro said that a woman could never be the best swordman in the world, there are soooo many things in between the lines. Why not?

As if it wasn't enough, the boys accused Kuina of being that much better than them because her dad was the leader of the dojo, so he must be teaching her in secret. Her merits were never hers, just the results of another man. "Ah, that girl can't be that good, she must be getting help, receiving special treatment, getting extra training, etc". It's infuriating and Kuina shows it. They disrespect her like it's nothing, like it's natural. Her own dad allows it and participates in that.

Before Zoro, Kuina had no one to tell her that her skills were only hers. Her body, her heritage, not of that mattered. She was the rightful winner of their matches, at least so far.

When Zoro cries out of frustration and Kuina asks him if he even knows why she should be the one crying for it? Life changing moment. Zoro got the praise and loyalty of the dojo boys, the admiration of the older people training there, he was even the special boy of her dad— Koushiro let Zoro clown around with multiple swords and watch Kuina beat his ass, but it'd never matter.

Zoro wouldn't be betrayed by his own body, his own family, his own dojo and his own hometown. He was an outsider accepted by the community, their pride even. He came out of nowhere and they gave him everything she wanted and both of them deserved. It's just that it wasn't a fair fight: Zoro was a boy and Kuina was a girl. She'd always have to fight harder even if she was better.

For me, I really think that only Zoro could carry Wado Ichimonji with him. He was the only one who respected Kuina as a person and a rival, not seeing what others saw in her. Zoro honored all their fights, never tried to discredit her, because even when Koushiro tried to give Zoro an excuse "you forgot that she's a little older than you", Zoro brushed it away. No, he could beat grown-ups. That was not it.

Kuina was better than him. Period.

The fact that she died in such an accident and the way Koushiro said "humans are fragile things"... It is just so amazing. What Kuina feared the most: all her potential, wasted. When she was finally ready to go after what she wanted, she fell down the stairs and died. Simple. The promise Zoro and Kuina made was wasted too. Now Zoro had all the time in the world and Kuina had no time at all. She was always against fate and Zoro rode with it.

I still think about how Zoro plans to make it all worth something: if she can rightfully fight for the title, then he won't let anyone have it but him. If Kuina was able to beat 2001 times the boy who would become the best swordman in the world, then no one could insult him ever again. And if he won that title with her sword, then he'd elevate both their names. If he could fulfill his promise to her, then that night would hold its meaning.

I love Kuina soooo freaking much and I love how much Zoro values her, even to this day.

#shan blogs about one piece! #roronoa zoro #shimotsuki kuina

[mint-yooxgi]

{9} - Hotel California - Yandere!Demonic Entities!Ateez X Reader

Yandere AU & Demon AU - Based off of This ask and Hotel California by Eagles

Genre: Mature, Horror, Angst, Fluff, Slight Humor

Pairing: Ateez X Reader

Words: 9,094

Warnings: Whore Knee Thots, another lotr reference, I don’t think this one is too bad for things. This is a Yandere story, it will contain themes such as stalking, violence, obsession, possessive natures, and just general overall creepiness and swearing. You have been warned.

A/n: I forgot to add that a certain line of dialogue Yunho says in this chapter is cutesy of @synthetickitsune​ so thank you!!! And so part two becomes two of three lmaoo, I honestly did not expect this one chapter to get split into three, but with what I still have planned, it would have ended up like, 30k words by the end of it lmaoo. Hope you all enjoy, and as always, feedback is greatly appreciated!

Main Story - Part Two - Part Three - Part Four - Part Five - Part Six - Part Seven - Part Eight - Mini Masterlist

It only takes a moment for them to all catch up with you as you ride the escalator back down to the first floor. The only downside seems to be that you’ve closed off your mind from them again, your void almost perfectly back in place.

With difficulty, they all attempt to control their breathing for the time being; each male desperately tries to ground themselves, doing their best to keep their entire bodies from shaking as pure need courses through their veins. They didn’t think that they could fall anymore in love with you than they already are, but then you went and did this.

Anyone else have the desire to completely fucking ravish her until she passes out from pleasure right now? San’s gaze is locked onto your back as he licks his lips shamelessly, eyes dark and full of need.

That was one of the hottest things I’ve ever seen in my entire life. Mingi swallows the sudden dryness in his throat, gaze roaming freely over your figure as you head towards the cash line with them in tow.

Did you see the way her personality just flipped in an instant? Wooyoung is nearly panting at this point, barely keeping it together as he stares at your ass.

I didn’t know she had it in her. Yunho replies, somewhat breathlessly. 

Pride swirls in his chest, reflected in his gaze as he recalls every detail of your instructions. He only hopes that they were able to impress you with how well they served you just now. Based off of the lingering thoughts he could hear echoing in your mind before you closed your void, he knows that that is most certainly the case. The fact that you seem grateful towards them, too, is simply icing on the cake.

Could she get anymore fucking perfect for us? Seonghwa bites his lip, needing to suppress the moan that shamelessly builds in his chest as he thinks back on the events that have just occurred. He can still feel his shoulder tingling from where you touched him earlier, too.

She has to know how this affects us, right? Jongho shoots them all a brief glance out of the corner of his eyes, seeing as he’s still standing next to you for the moment. The way you seemingly lean into him for support has a pleased growl building in his chest. What it means to us?

I’d be more than happy to show her. San’s lips part, taking some long, and what are supposed to be calming, breaths. Instead, it only makes his desire for you grow, becoming surrounded by everything you as his senses are overwhelmed. He swears he can practically taste you already on his tongue.

This day is turning out much better than I could have ever imagined. Yeosang admits, eyes roaming the side of your profile before taking a step closer and joining in on your conversation with Jongho in the next second.

I don’t think any of us could have imagined these pleasant turn of events. Hongjoong finally speaks, managing to calm himself down just enough to get his thoughts in order once more. 

Ever since he saw you turn around upstairs after you had finished your little condemnation of that bastard, he couldn’t help but be consumed by his fantasies once more. All Hongjoong could picture was the two of you standing side by side, vanquishing your enemies together, followed immediately by the most passionate love making of his entire life as you bathe in the blood of your victims. He nearly had to adjust himself there for a minute, until he managed to calm himself down enough on the small journey back to the first floor.

At least all of them can agree: you will become theirs soon. Officially. In every meaning of the word. You just have to. They’ll make sure of it, for they don’t know how much more of this that they can take. You drive them so crazy, and you don’t even realize it yet. Or maybe, you do.

Though, they still would never force you into anything you were truly uncomfortable with. They just want you, and bad. To rule at their side. To love and to cherish. To have and to hold. To protect and to keep forever as theirs, just as they are yours. Until the end of time.

Finally, it’s your turn to be cashed out at the front of the line after a few more minutes of waiting. Making your way over to the register, you begin to pull out your wallet.

“What are you doing?” Yeosang’s voice catches your attention as he walks up with both you and Jongho.

“Paying for my books.” You reply as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “What does it look like I’m doing?”

“My Dear, I thought we already told you,” Yeosang smiles softly at you as he places a hand overtop of yours to prevent you from pulling out your wallet any further. In the next moment, he begins leading you out of the store. “Just let us take care of you.”

You blink, protests dying in your throat as you look back to see Jongho already holding a bag full of what you’re sure are your books. A second later, and they’re both ushering you out of the store to wait in the hallway for the others. As soon as they’re all in front of you once more, you’re crossing your arms in front of your chest.

“You know I don’t expect you all to pay for everything for me, right?” You shoot them all an expectant look.

“We know,” Hongjoong smiles, eyes crinkling at the sides.

“It’s different if we want to do so.” Yunho says, somewhat matter-of-factly.

“We’ve already told you,” San gazes at you with a fond look shining in his eyes. “You don’t have to worry about a single thing when you’re with us.”

“We are all more than ready and willing to provide for you in any and every way we can.” Jongho adds, eyes soft as he meets your own.

“Whatever you want,” it’s Mingi that draws your attention to him next, his eyes crinkling as he smiles widely at you.

“Whenever you need it,” Seonghwa breathes out, and only the eight of them truly understand the double meaning behind his words.

“Seeing you happy is all that we really want.” Wooyoung’s voice is gentle as the corner of his lips tug upwards in a grin.

“Just let us take care of you.” Yeosang repeats his words from only moments before, his hand settling on top of yours once more.

“Fine.” You let out a long exhale through your nose, lips tugging slightly downwards in defeat. “But I’m buying you all drinks later, or something.”

“You don’t have to-“

“Um, no.” You raise your hand, stopping the rest of the protest that begins to fall from Mingi’s lips.

“We don’t expect-“

“Ah-ah.” You wag your finger at Wooyoung next. “None of this ‘we can treat you, but you can’t treat us’ crap.”

“But-“

“No ‘but’s!” You round on San, quirking your eyebrow as you look between all of them. “Just let me treat my men to something, okay?”

They all blink, caught momentarily off guard by your admission. Pleased growls build in their chests as your words sink in, Though, from the way you continue, it’s as if you haven’t even noticed you’ve said them, or the affect you’ve just had on all of them.

“If it’s not mutual, I don’t want it.” You shake your head slightly, as if to emphasize your point, turning around in the next moment to begin walking down the hall. At seeing them still standing exactly where you left them after taking a few steps, you’re turning to look at them from over your shoulder with a quirked brow, “coming?”

In an instant, both San and Wooyoung are on either side of you, that single word enough to snap them all out of their daze. The others fall in line shortly after, following close behind as you lead them around the mall.

Just as you walk past your local game store, a product in the window draws your gaze.

“No fucking way,” your jaw drops, blinking in mild shock as you pause in the middle of the hallway.

“What?” It’s Yeosang who follows your gaze immediately, a furrow to his brow at what could have possibly drawn your attention like this.

There, in the front window of the store, sits a giant Snorlax beanbag chair. Though, from how it’s stuffed into the display, he looks a little squished in your opinion.

“Free him,” you chuckle, already making your way over to the storefront to see how much he costs. At the price you see glaring back at you, your eyes widen, “never mind.”

Immediately, San, Wooyoung, and Yeosang all begin to make their way towards the entrance. The only thought on each of their minds is buying that Snorlax for you, arguing with each other over who gets to pay. That is, until you’re stepping in front of them, successfully blocking their path to the store.

“No.” You shake your head.

“What did we just tell you?” San quirks a brow, crossing his arms in front of his chest expectantly.

“I don’t care.” You shake your head once more. “It’s not a need, or a necessity.”

“Yet, books are?” Yunho quirks a brow at you this time, an amused grin tugging at his lips.

“Books are different,” you begin, noticing Wooyoung attempting to step around you only for you to match each of his movements. For a third time, you shake your head. “I’m putting my foot down for this.”

“If you truly don’t want us to, then we won’t.” Hongjoong says, shooting a stern look at the younger demons who look back at him with pouts on their faces. We can buy stuff for her later, when she can’t complain about it. Or stop us for that matter.

“Thank you.” You tilt your head in acknowledgement in his direction, a soft smile adorning your features.

Hongjoong smiles back, following your lead once more as you continue on down the hallway.

I’m coming back for that later. Yeosang immediately projects, quite sternly, into his brother’s minds. All of you find something else to buy for her.

Fine. Wooyoung replies, a bit grumpily. I’m sure there will be plenty more where that came from, anyways.

Exactly. Hongjoong hums, noticing how you enter a store full of soaps, candles, and fragrances, amongst other products, next. I simply believe she isn’t used to being gifted the things she wants, especially when we don’t expect anything in return but her own happiness.

I still wish she’d let us treat her, though. Seonghwa grumbles, walking over to the display of colognes off to the side. Without pushback.

She will, Hongjoong replies, testing out a moisturizer on the back of his one hand. Eventually.

Yunho, keep an eye on her mind. Mingi adds, both him and San helping you decide on some candles as you continuously bring the different scents to your nose to test them.

Already on it. He grins, watching the scene fondly from the front of the store as Jongho and Yeosang stand beside him.

“Oh, I wonder if they have- they do!” Your eyes widen as excitement takes over your features.

In an instant, you’ve taken a few steps to your left, grabbing a specific candle off of the shelf and removing the lid. A smile tugs at your lips as your eyes flutter closed, a content hum escaping you as you take a deep breath in.

Each male cannot help the way their mouths suddenly go dry, that small sound of pleasure ringing through their ears just as it did last night.

“Mahogany teakwood,” you breathe, extending the candle out for both San and Mingi to smell. “My favourite scent.”

San leans in first to sniff it, smiling back at you in response as he straightens to his full height. 

It’s musky. Mingi comments to all of them after his first whiff of the candle. Definitely something a male might wear.

Are there any colognes of the scent? San turns, spotting Seonghwa by the display.

Immediately, Seonghwa is scanning the labels, attempting to find the one he’s looking for before San can finish making his way over to where he is. Luckily for him, he spots the bottle a moment later, snatching it off of the display in an instant. It was the last one, too.

You bastard. San growls, noticing how the eldest grins smugly at him while waving the bottle in the younger’s face.

You snooze, you lose. Seonghwa repeats the youngest’s words from earlier in the day, beginning to move off to a different section of the store.

Relax, there’s also a body wash. Wooyoung comments, already pulling a bottle off of the shelf to check the label.

Immediately, it’s like a race between San and Seonghwa to make it over to where Wooyoung is standing. Each male practically shoves the other out of the way as they reach the shelf, arguing amongst themselves about who gets to use this particular scent as their own.

You can only blink from across the store in shock, an amused snort escaping you as you watch the chaos unfold before your very eyes.

“Are they always like this?” You lean into Mingi who has yet to leave your side.

He sighs, a small quirk to his lips upwards, “you’d be surprised.”

“Honestly, you’d think there’s a sale on toner or something, with how they booked it across the store.” You mumble, chuckling to yourself as you turn back towards the candles. “Oh, fresh pine!”

Taking another candle off of the shelf, you’re quick to open the lid. Again, a smile tugs at your features as you inhale the earthy scent deeply. Almost immediately, you’re extending it out to Mingi who leans in without another thought to smell the candle.

“Another one of my favourites,” you admit, tucking it into your arm beside your mahogany teakwood candle.

Yunho- Mingi glances at his brother from across the store.

Already on it. Yunho grins, heading over to the display to pull two bottles of cologne off of it. I’ll grab the body wash, too.

Mingi nods subtly in the other male’s direction, following you once more through the store as you go to check out the seasonal candles.

See if you can find out what other scents she likes. Jongho’s voice echoes through all of their heads, even if his comment is directed at Mingi for the moment.

Already on it. Mingi repeats Yunho’s words from mere moments before, a grin tugging at his lips as he watches your eyes light up.

“Fresh orchard? Don’t mind if I ‘yes’,” you reach for the candle shamelessly, eyes widening as the faint, crisp scent of apples reaches your nose. Your face light ups. "And the apples aren’t overpowering everything. Hell yes!”

Mingi cannot help but share in your excitement as you extend the candle out for him to smell. He has to agree, the scent of the apples isn’t overpowering the other aromas found within, giving rise for the subtle vanilla, cinnamon, and oak to come through.

Looking up, he catches gazes with Jongho who stands just outside of the store. An understanding passes between them, Mingi subtly nodding his head at the youngest in an instant.

Only, you turn your head just in time to notice him looking at something outside of the store. Following his gaze, that’s when you see both Yeosang and Jongho still standing in the hallway of the mall, the few bags from the bookstore held in their hands. Your brow furrows.

“Sometimes all of the scents overwhelm them and give them headaches,” Mingi informs you.

“I had no idea,” a small frown pulls at your features, lips tugging downwards as you continue to stare at the two males outside of the shop. 

It’s then that you feel two subtle caresses brushing against your void, the water rippling beneath their touch. Tentatively, and probably against your better judgment, you’re opening your mind.

Little do you know of the way such a simple act warms their hearts.

Please, do not feel bad about this, Dearest. Yeosang’s voice is the first you hear resounding in your head. It is not your fault.

We are more than content to see you happy like this. Jongho adds as they both send you reassuring smiles.

You smile back softly, a subtle nod to your head before you’re closing off your void to them once more.

“I didn’t even know you guys could get headaches.” You say, turning back to Mingi beside you.

“It’s rare, but we can still suffer from the same ailments as you,” Hongjoong voices, walking up beside you with a few products in his hands. “Well, minus a few things, of course. Like cancer.”

“Huh,” you hum, nodding along with his words. “Interesting.”

“Granted, we can either let the ailment manifest, or heal ourselves immediately,” Hongjoong adds, watching as Mingi walks off to go grab some things of his own, including that fresh orchard scent for Jongho.

“It’s a little difficult to imagine you guys with something as trivial as a stomachache, if I’m being honest,” you reply, looking through the rest of the display before you.

“Yeah, that tends to only happen if we’ve ingested a really nasty soul,” Wooyoung pops up on your other side, reaching across to grab at a particular body lotion on display.

“Though, there are certain ailments that can affect us, but not you,” Hongjoong tells you, stepping out of the way as you go to move around him. “Others that affect us could potentially kill you if you ever caught them.”

“Gee, that makes me feel so assured,” you mumble, walking passed him for the moment.

“Don’t worry, Gorgeous, we’d take care of you,” Wooyoung grins, stepping in line beside you as you reach the back of the store. “We know all of the cures, anyways. If it ever came to that.”

“Not to mention we could just heal you if you got sick,” Hongjoong reminds you, the conversation he had with you about injuries in the garden flitting through his mind.

“Right,” you nod in acknowledgement, and he just knows you’re thinking back to that moment, too. “I remember you telling me that.”

“Or, we could just feed you our blood.” Wooyoung comments nonchalantly.

Your eyes nearly bug out of your head, “excuse me?”

“It would be the fastest way to heal you,” Hongjoong says, shooting a pointed look towards Wooyoung for just dropping that little tidbit of information on you. “Quicker and more effective than our healing abilities, with some added side effects.”

“Side effects?” Your brow furrows.

“Nothing bad, don’t worry,” Hongjoong assures you with a small smile. “We would never let you get to a point where you would need to ingest our blood to heal yourself, anyways.”

“Good to know,” you huff out a small laugh, lips quirking upwards in slight disbelief at the conversation you’ve just had with them.

Hongjoong smiles back at you as the others all come to join you in the cash line, seeing as they’ve also finished looking around for the moment.

“Got everything you need?” Seonghwa asks, a soft smile painting his features as you nod back at him in response.

“They stopped carrying my other favourite scent a while ago,” you sigh, a slight pout to your lips. “So, this is good for now.”

“What one was that?” San is a little too eager in his inquiry.

“Sea island cotton.” You reply, somewhat wistfully. “It was really light and soothing.”

Hongjoong’s brow furrows, holding out one of the bottles of lotion in his hands, “you mean this?”

Your eyes nearly bulge out of your head as you see the label facing you, your free hand coming up to snatch the bottle right out of his hand. Then, you meet his gaze. “Where did you find this?”

Hongjoong points over his shoulder at the back corner of the store, blinking at you in mild shock at the wide-eyed look you send him.

“I’ll be right back,” you immediately go to step out of line, but a hand on your shoulder stops you.

“I’ll grab it for you,” Seonghwa offers, not even giving you a chance to deny him as he steps out of line, already halfway to the display in the blink of an eye.

Hwa, can you- Yeosang doesn’t even get to finish his question before the eldest is replying.

I’ve got you covered. Reaching the display, Seonghwa grabs a few different bottles including a body mist, body lotion, and a few body washes before heading back over to the cash line.

As soon as you see the bottles in his hands, your eyes light up, and each male practically swoons at the sight. All save for Seonghwa, who instead feels his heart fluttering in his chest as you look at him like he’s just brought you the greatest gift you could ever ask for. He swallows thickly, attempting to keep his arms from shaking.

Yeah. They could all get used to this.

“Here, why don’t you give us your stuff and go wait outside with Yeosang and Jongho?” Yunho says, already reaching to take the few items that you’re holding from your hands.

Again, the protests you’re about to say die in your throat as Mingi grabs the final item from you. In the next moment, Wooyoung uses his free hand to begin turning you around gently, ushering you to take a step towards the entrance of the store.

“Fine,” you grumble, a slight pout tugging at your lips as you cross you arms in front of your chest, beginning to make your way out of the shop.

Both Yeosang and Jongho smile as soon as they see you, having gotten a glimpse of your excited expression only moments before curtesy of their brothers. They absolutely adore the fact that you choose to stand in-between them, too, even if you still have your arms crossed in discontent for the moment.

A few minutes later, the other six are all walking out of the store, bags held in their hands. You attempt to reach for some of them, only to be brushed off by each male holding a bag. Even when you complain that you can carry something, they assure you that it’s fine. They don’t want you worrying your pretty little head about anything today, or ever for that matter.

You pout once more, leading them further down the hall and towards the direction of the foodcourt for the time being. Still, you cannot help but mutter about those damn demons once more under your breath, causing smiles to pull at all of their faces.

“If you want to hold onto something that badly,” San begins, a mischievous glint in his eyes that his brothers know all too well, “hold on to this.”

In the blink of an eye, he’s grabbed your hand in his, interlocking your fingers together without a second thought. He can just feel the jealous glares of his brothers on his back as he watches your eyes widen, a momentary falter to your steps as he catches you off guard. At the way he cheekily smiles at you, you can only avert your gaze somewhat shyly in response, a heat rising to your cheeks.

The best part? You don’t pull away.

“I am curious, though,” you say after a little while, San beginning to swing your interlocked hands gently back and forth between you as he hears Wooyoung complaining to him about holding onto your hand in his head. “How exactly do you guys get the money for all of this stuff? It’s hard to imagine you all working any type of retail job.”

“Could you imagine us working at a grocery store?” Wooyoung laughs. “Seonghwa would bite someone’s head off within five minutes.”

You half expect the oldest to complain about what Wooyoung’s saying about him, but at the subtle nodding of Seonghwa’s head, you let out a snort of laughter. 

Instantly, he’s turning to meet your gaze, a sheepish shrug gracing his shoulders as he grins back at you. “Guilty.”

“Jongho and Yeosang definitely wouldn’t have the patience to deal with difficult customers.” Yunho observes, receiving a loud ‘hey’ in protest from the youngest.

“San would be throwing out nearly all of the produce, complaining that it’s not fresh enough to be stocked on shelves,” Mingi joins in with a chuckle, a large smile painting his features.

“It’s true, though!” San retorts, an exasperated look pulling onto his features.

“Yes, yes, we all know about your two hour long rant on produce quality,” Yeosang practically rolls his eyes in response to the male’s reaction, eliciting another of the sweetest giggles from your lips.

“Anyways,” Hongjoong is drawing your attention to him as he speaks for the moment. “To answer your question, My Love, we acquire our wealth through many different means. The main ones being investing, and through real estate. We’ve been around for quite a long time, that we’ve learned a few tricks of the trade.”

“We are also the Kings of the Realm with the whole wealth of the underworld at out fingertips.” Jongho adds, nonchalantly.

The way you nod, clearly impressed, has pride filling their chests once more.

“That’s not to mention our other means of acquirement,” Wooyoung wiggles his brows at you suggestively.

“Never pictured you guys as strippers, but oddly enough, it’s very fitting.” You reply without a second thought, a store up ahead catching your attention.

Mingi nearly trips over his own feet as Wooyoung bursts out laughing, causing some heads of passers by to turn to look in your direction.

“We’re not-“ Seonghwa sighs, shaking his head at the younger demon with the skunk dyed hair. “We’re not strippers.”

“Ah,” your eyes go wide as you draw out the syllable, a teasing lilt to your voice. “Shame.”

“What Wooyoung meant to say, is that we sometimes acquire wealth through other, unfavourable means as well.” Hongjoong explains.

Your eyes narrow suspiciously. “Elaborate.”

“Gambling, the black market, assassinations: you name it,” Yunho informs you, a small shrug to his shoulders.

“Honestly,” you let out a sharp puff of air through your nose, “that doesn’t surprise me as much as it should.”

“Well, we are essentially demons.” Yeosang voices with a small shrug.

“Demonic entities,” you say, somewhat breathlessly, recalling the very first night when you learned of their true nature. “What does that even mean? Aren’t you guys essentially gods?”

San smirks, “you could say that.”

Then, as if recalling another one of your memories, you continue, “you all flinch whenever I say phrases referring to the catholic religion. Or at least, I think you do.”

“Force of habit,” Mingi replies honestly. “It’s difficult to not remember a time when people would use those phrases to curse our names.”

“Would it help if I told you that I don’t really believe in them, and I say those things more as a reactionary phrase just to say them over anything else?” You quirk a brow. Then, quickly, you add, “but I’ll never say them again if it hurts you.”

All of them are touched by your consideration for them right now, that they cannot help but fall even deeper for you in this moment. You all still may not be on the best of terms, but if today is anything to go by, you are both very receptive and accepting of them already. In the little time that they’ve actually been with you, they’ve been able to make tremendous progress. A fact which makes them beyond joyous in this moment here in time.

“It does indeed help.” Seonghwa smiles softly at you, probably the most touched out of all of them by your sudden consideration. “Though, don’t feel as if you have to stop saying those phrases now. Especially if you do not actually believe in them.”

You nod, turning your attention back to the front as you continue to walk down the hallway.

“Then, what do you believe in?” Jongho asks the question on all of their minds, curiosity reflected in all of their eyes as they shift their focus back onto you.

You stare ahead, blinking a few times as you watch the shop that you want to check inside of get closer and closer. Then, the corner of your lips is twitching upwards as you decide to let your thoughts actually be vocalized for the moment. You figure that there’s no harm in letting them know.

“I believe in all of you.”

For the second time that day, tears line the corner of Mingi’s eyes. Both Yunho and Jongho cannot help the way that their breaths hitch in their throats, while both Wooyoung and Seonghwa have to place one of their hands over their beating hearts to keep them from bursting right out of their chests. Yeosang pauses momentarily mid-step as his eyes close, his hand coming up to cover the lower half of his face as he absolutely revels in your words.

A soft smile tugs onto Hongjoong’s features, nothing but absolute fondness and adoration shining in his gaze as he looks at you. His heart swells in his chest, his throat bobbing as he swallows all of the words he wants to say back to you in this moment, in order to simply bask in this glorious feeling.

Out of the corner of your eyes, you notice San wiping at his cheek with the back of his free hand.

You blink, worry taking over your features immediately as you halt right in your tracks, conveniently right in front of the store you want to enter. “Did I say something wrong?”

“Of course not,” San squeezes your hand reassuringly, bringing it up to his lips to place a tender kiss onto your skin as he holds it there, revelling both in the feeling and meaning of this moment here in time with you.

“It just means a lot to us.” Yunho clears his throat, voice suddenly rough with the rawness of his emotions as he is overcome by the significance of your words. “What you’ve just said.”

“More than you’ll ever know.” Seonghwa smiles softly at you, his eyes shining with something that you don’t quite understand, but once it finally sinks in, you find it suddenly hard to breathe.

You take a moment to look around at the eight men surrounding you. You can see the adoration clear in their eyes, the fondness shining within causing your heart to race. No one has ever gazed at you so lovingly before. A fact of which causes your heart to then swell with an unfamiliar emotion, but a pleasant one, nonetheless.

For the first time in your life, you understand what it feels like to be someone’s first choice. You understand what it feels like to be wanted, to be desired by another person in a way that you are starting to desire them. You feel safe. You feel cared for. More than all of that, you feel comfortable in your own skin around them.

For the first time in your entire life, you understand what it feels like for someone to be in love with you. You, and only you.

A soft smile graces your features as you squeeze San’s hand back, looking between all of them once more as you all share in this tender moment together.

“I want to know more about you guys,” you say, watching as their features all light up in excitement. “But first, let me head in there to see an old friend,” you point to the jewellery store across from you as you gently drop San’s hand, much to his discontent, “and then we can all talk over drinks.”

Smiles pull at all of their lips, and you see a few of them nod their heads eagerly at your words.

“Sounds good,” Hongjoong meets your gaze, tone reflecting the happiness on his features.

“Great,” you smile, already heading towards the shop mere steps away.

The jewellery store is small in size, more of an antique shop than anything else as gems glitter in the display cases surrounding the area. In fact, a lot of the items look hand made, for each piece is unique in its design. Some of the pieces are rare, and some are odd: not typical items one would find in your average jewellery store. 

There only seems to be one person sitting inside behind the counter at the moment, scrolling through his phone. However, as soon as he looks up to see you walking into the store with both Seonghwa and Hongjoong in tow, his eyes are widening.

An excited gasp of your name slips past the male’s lips as he hops off of the stool he had been sitting on in order to practically tackle you in a hug. At the way you hear two pointed exhales behind you, you can just tell the two eldest are staring daggers at this man right now. You chuckle.

“David, hey!” You smile, pulling away to hold him at arm’s length. “It’s been a while.”

“You’re telling me, Missy.” He shoots you a pointed look, voice full of sass. “I thought I was going to die of boredom if you didn’t come to see me again, soon.”

“You’d die of boredom, anyways,” you roll your eyes, smacking his arm playfully.

“Guilty,” he grins, a small shrug to his one shoulder. “Anyways, how’ve you been? I heard you’re no longer working at the mall, which is why you haven’t come to visit in a while. Thanks for letting me know, by the way.”

“Oh, you most definitely don’t sound upset about that,” you snort, rolling your eyes teasingly in the next moment. “I meant to tell you, I really did! Just, shit happened.”

“Oh my god, was it Henry?” Immediately, concern is written all over his features.

Behind you, you can practically feel both Hongjoong’s and Seonghwa’s chests rumbling with suppressed growls. So, for the first time, you attempt to do to them what they’ve done to you. With difficulty, you envision reaching out to them with your void, hoping that they’ll be able to pick up on it if they’re still constantly monitoring your thoughts. You’re sure they are, especially if their sharp inhales are anything to go by, which can mean one thing, and one thing only. It worked.

“No, no, luckily not,” you’re quick to shake your head. “I have a feeling he’s not going to be bothering anyone ever again.”

“Bastard finally got his comeuppance, did he?” David quirks a brow at you.

“A well deserved punishment dealt swiftly, and quite flawlessly, if I do say so myself,” you smile, and you fail to realize just how proud you’ve made the two males (and the six in the hallway) standing behind you at your words.

“Thank fuck,” David breathes, closing his eyes momentarily as a sense of relief washes over him. Then, it’s as if his whole demeanour flips, a bright smile painting his features as he meets your gaze once more. “What brings you in today?”

“Can’t I come in to see my lovely friend?” You quirk a brow, grin tugging at your lips.

“And here I was thinking you came to pick up that necklace you commissioned from me.” He replies, already moving back behind the counter.

“Necklace?” Your brow furrows only momentarily until realization is crossing your features. With so much going on, you completely forgot about the fact that you had him make one for you. “Oh, right! That necklace.”

“Honestly, woman, how do you survive?” He chuckles teasingly, opening the door to the backroom to peek his head inside. “Suzy, can you bring out order eighty-seven?”

“I honestly forgot about that,” you chuckle, somewhat nervously. You just know that this has grabbed the two male’s attention behind you. Two male who have remained unusually silent for the moment as they pretend to browse through the store on their own.

In the next moment, a shorter woman appears almost eagerly, holding a somewhat large black velvet box in her hands. As soon as she sees you, her eyes light up, an excited squeal of your name escaping her lips. “I just knew it was you as soon as David told me to grab this order!”

“It’s good to see you, too, Suzy,” you smile at her enthusiasm.

“Well, here you go,” she hands the box to you and you turn to place it on top of the counter. 

David now stands across from you while the two demons step in behind you, casually observing from over each one of your shoulders. They have no idea what this necklace could be, considering your thoughts are closed off, and all they’re getting from both Suzy and David are how excited they are to see your reaction.

Slowly, you begin to open the velvet box in front of you. 

A gasp escapes you as you take in the elegance of the design, noting the little details of the craftwork as you lift the necklace carefully out of the case. The way the gems gleam in the light has your eyes sparkling in awe. Your breath catches in your throat at the amount of effort you know David put into this for you, and you cannot help the way your heart warms at that fact alone.

There, dangling like the brightest star in the night sky, is a perfect replica of Arwen’s Evenstar necklace.

“I’m sure you two know all about her little obsession with that favourite series of hers.” David grins, directing his comment towards the two males standing beside you at the moment. He’s noticed how close they’ve been to you since entering the store, not only physically, but with how they seem to watch you carefully, a tender look in each one of their eyes.

“Believe me,” Seonghwa breathes out, projecting your beautiful, awestruck expression to his other brothers currently waiting outside in the hallway.

“We know.” Hongjoong concludes just as breathlessly, his own eyes catching on the way yours reflect the light just like the piece of jewellery in your hand.

“David,” you meet his gaze, the sincerity shining in your own, “I can’t thank you enough.”

“You commissioned it.” He grins back, seemingly shrugging off your praise for the moment. “I’m just glad I could deliver.”

“How much do I owe you?” You begin, settling the necklace back in its box for the time being as you softly close the lid.

“You already payed for it, remember?” He chuckles, reaching over and grabbing your free hand that you have resting on top of the counter before you, giving it a gentle squeeze in the next second.

“Right,” you chuckle along with him, “I did.”

“Sometimes you have to treat yourself to the things you want most.” Suzy directs her comment at you with a smile, repeating your very words back to you that you had told her when you first commissioned this piece of jewellery. “You should indulge yourself more often; let yourself have nice things.”

You smile softly. “Right.”

“Well, I’m glad you like it because it’ll make what I’m about to tell you less painful,” David leans against the counter, motioning behind you to a specific display with his chin. “It sold.”

Your jaw drops, immediately turning and stepping across the store to take in the case that held one of your two favourite items in the shop. “No way.”

“What sold?” It’s Hongjoong who asks the question, casually looking over all of the items in the case before him.

“Only her favourite jewelled dagger.” David grins, meeting Hongjoong’s gaze for the first time since he entered the shop. “It was ceremonial, too."

For the second time that day, Hongjoong needs to lean onto the display in front of him for support. His breathing nearly comes in jagged pants, were it not for the way he manages to control himself for the time being. Barely. Still, he cannot help the shiver of pleasure that runs down his spine at learning this specific fact about you.

“You don’t say,” his voice is airy, turning to look at the way you circle the glass case before you.

“I’m surprised whoever bought it didn’t buy the matching sword.” You hum, noting the jewelled handle with the same exact design as the dagger.

“I tried to sell them as a set, but the girl that bought it only wanted the dagger,” David replies with an exasperated sigh.

You scoff, “shame the set was separated, but they are both expensive items.”

“I guess so,” David sighs once more, resting his head in his open palm as he continues to lean against the counter. “Perhaps it’s a sign that you should buy the sword.”

At the suggestive wiggle of David’s brows, you let out a puff of laughter. 

“You know that if I buy myself a sword, I’m buying a replica of Anduíl.” You shoot David a look, shaking your head in the next moment, muttering under your breath, “just wish it wasn’t over two-fucking-thousand dollars for one.”

The two eldest share a look.

“I didn’t know you liked blades,” Seonghwa voices, attempting to control himself as well for the moment. The mental image alone of you holding one of his swords in your hands has his knees weak, throat suddenly parched as he looks towards you for the time being.

“I don’t know, maybe it’s just the stereotypical bisexual in me,” you shrug, nonchalantly. “I’ve always had an affinity towards them. Swords, knives, daggers, you name it.”

“Yeah, yeah, we all know you’ve got a knife kink,” David waves you off, standing back to his full height with a teasing grin on his face. “Goes hand in hand with that blood kink of yours.”

Your mouth falls open in horror, a heat rising to your cheeks. “David!”

Even Suzy looks caught off guard by his statement, her eyes nearly bulging out of her head as she leans against the wall.

Most importantly, though, you don’t deny it.

Little do you all know of how this little admission affects the two males in the shop, but especially one in particular. Now, Hongjoong barely suppresses his pleased growl, his mind running wild with this new information. 

Perhaps he should take you to see his knife collection at some point, letting you pick out the ones you like most to use as you play out all of his darkest fantasies with him. The trust alone you would have for him at that point in your relationship sends a shiver down his spine as he envisions it now. Not to mention the added effect of you and him covered in blood, laving your tongues over each other’s skin to drink in the victory of vanquishing your enemies together.

You literally could not be more perfect.

“At least we still have the other item you always love to stare at when you’re here,” David breaks the growing tension in the shop, voice cutting through the silence as he moves back to his original spot by the stool.

“Really? It still hasn’t sold?” You choose to move on from the embarrassment you’re still feeling, hoping that the two males won’t bring up what they’ve just learned about you any time soon. Though, with how dark their gazes are as they look at you, you know they won’t be letting this go so quickly.

“Even I’m surprised,” Suzy adds, seemingly back to her normal, chipper self after those scandalizing comments from David about you.

“What is it?” This time, it’s Seonghwa who asks.

A knowing smirk pulls onto David’s features, “I’ll show you.”

“No, David-“ you don’t even get a chance to protest as he’s unlocking the cabinet in front of him and pulling out the item in question.

Both Hongjoong and Seonghwa cannot prevent the way their breaths catch in their throats at the object now presented to them. Moans nearly spilling from their lips as they take in the sight before them.

There, on a red velvet display pillow, resides a beautiful crystal crown. Diamonds and white sapphires sparkle along the base, interwoven between the opaque quarts gems rising into a sharp point from either side. Small chains adorn the bottom, and as David lifts the crown, they fall, only to dangle with more small crystals hanging off of the ends. The intricacy of the design alone takes their breath away. Not to mention how it absolutely glimmers beneath the artificial lights of the store, each gem sparkling beneath their gaze.

Truly, a crown fit for their Queen.

“I think today should be the day you finally put it on.” David directs his comment towards you, seemingly nonchalant as he quirks a brow.

“We couldn’t agree more,” Seonghwa replies breathlessly, as both he and Hongjoong turn to look at you, eagerness shining in their eyes.

“Uh,” you hesitate, unsure of what to do.

“Oh, please?” Suzy whines, eyes shining and hopeful. “I’ve always wanted to see you wear it.”

Your breath hitches in your throat as all four of their gazes are now locked on you. Even as your eyes drift past Seonghwa’s head, you can see the six males waiting in the hallway just outside watching on intently, an almost pleading eagerness to their own features.

You swallow the sudden dryness in your throat, voice but a mere whisper on the air, “Alright.”

Stepping towards David, you begin to do whatever you can to steady your nerves. You know this will mean more to the eight of them than to you right now, but if you’re being honest with yourself, you have always wanted to wear a crown. You’ve just never had a reason to have one before now.

For a moment, the shared memory of you in that field with Yunho flashes through your mind, and you cannot help but to smile softly. A sentiment which is shared by the tall male in the hallway as he catches a glimpse of that moment flitting through your mind. At least this won’t be the first time one of them is seeing you in a crown.

Shifting your attention back to the situation in front of you, you notice Hongjoong standing before David.

“May I?” He asks, and you think that this is the most regal that you’ve ever seen him.

“Be my guest,” David grins, handing the crown over to Hongjoong without a second thought.

Hongjoong’s hands are shaking, whole body trembling as he turns towards you with the crown now held in his grasp. Even Seonghwa, who stands slightly off to the side, is having a hard time keeping it together at this very moment as he supports himself with one hand on top of a display case. Both cannot help but to hold their breaths, waiting in anticipation for what is still yet to come.

Then, as if your body already knows exactly what to do, you take a knee, lowering your head as Hongjoong approaches you. Your eyes flutter shut as you feel his presence before you, your heartbeat ringing in your ears.

Ever so slowly, and with the grace of a thousand moons, Hongjoong places the crown gently upon your head.

The moment you feel its weight on you, your eyes open. In the second it takes for him to take a step away from you, you stand back to your feet, lifting your head to see all eight of them already looking towards you.

The sight of you, standing before them in a crown, nearly sends them all to their knees right then and there for the third time that day. 

The first had been when you turned around in that bookstore, your condemnation of that bastard fresh in their minds as they all nearly went wild from your change in persona. The way you commanded their attention, and dealt your judgment, made them feel like a true ruler stood before them. Their Queen.

The second was when you told them you believed in them, only solidifying the fact that they are always ready and willing to do anything for you. They are so desperately in love with you, and to know that you trust them, that you believe in them, made them so unbelievably happy, their souls ascending like never before. Their confidant.

Now, they are finally able see one of their greatest desires coming to fruition before their very eyes, and none of them can deny the way that you look absolutely stunning. Words cannot even begin to describe your beauty to them right now, nor how much this moment means to them at this point in time. The love of their lives.

If they could, they would be on their knees in a heartbeat, worshipping and praising you in every and any way imaginable. After all, it’s what they’ve always wanted, and it’s what you’ve always deserved.

“You look absolutely regal.” David’s lips part in a gasp, pulling upwards into an excited smile in the next moment.

“I always knew you were a queen!” Suzy comments cheerfully, nodding her head enthusiastically.

Our Queen. Growls of approval build in their chests as they continue to take in the ethereal sight that is you before them like this.

If you don’t buy that for her right fucking now, Wooyoung begins, the sentiment being echoed by all of his brothers in this very moment, I will.

In your fucking dreams, I’m buying this for her. San retorts, his eyes swirling with that all too familiar darkness as he turns towards the younger male beside him.

As much as I agree, you guys can fight over this one, Yunho voices. I’ve already given her a crown of my own.

At this, all five males standing around him turn to glare harshly at Yunho. Were it not for the fact that they are in public right now, Mingi’s hands would already be wrapped around the elder male’s throat.

“How much is it?” Hongjoong’s voice manages to draw all of their attention back into the shop before them.

At the way your eyes widen significantly, you’re quick to take the crown off of your head and place it back onto the plush pillow on the counter.

“Don’t answer that.” You shoot a pointed look at David, shaking your head subtly as he glances at you out of the corner of his eyes. 

Then, he’s making a quick zipping motion across his lips, shooting you a wink in the next moment before turning back to face Hongjoong.

“Sorry, brother,” David sighs, putting the crown back inside it’s case. “Lady’s wishes.”

The snarls you can see beginning to tug onto both Seonghwa’s and Hongjoong’s features have you reacting quickly.

“Anyways, we should get going!” You cut in, reaching over to place a hand each onto both Seonghwa’s and Hongjoong’s shoulders to turn them around and guide them out of the shop. Only, just as quickly as your touch comes, it’s gone, you reaching over to grab the velvet box with your necklace in it in the next second, shaking it slightly in your hand. “Thanks again for this, you don’t know how much I appreciate it.”

“Of course!” David responds, coming around to give you a big hug once more. “Stop by anytime.”

“Come see us again, soon!” Suzy adds, scurrying around the counter to give you a hug of her own.

You chuckle. “I will, I promise.”

Waving a final goodbye to the two of them, you turn back around, noticing how the two eldest seem to be having a silent conversation with the six males outside of the shop. It’s only when you gently tap their upper backs, helping to guide them both out of the shop, do they move.

Stepping back up to the other six, you’re quick to continue making your way down the hallway once more. Only, there’s a slight nervousness to you now. They can see it clearly in the way your shoulders are tense, your hands gripping onto that velvet box for dear life.

It’s Yeosang who manages to break the sudden tension between the nine of you.

“Can I see?” His voice is soft as he falls into step beside you, eyes briefly glancing to the box held in your hands.

“Huh-“ you blink, seemingly pulled out of your thoughts as you turn to look at him gazing at you so fondly. You smile softly, “of course.”

Carefully, you open the case, slowing your pace to make sure you don’t accidentally drop the necklace now held in your hands. Again, that same twinkle in your eyes makes an appearance as you continue to gaze at it in awe, your heart racing in your chest.

“Would you like to put it on?” It’s Wooyoung who asks you, voice kind and caring as he glances between the necklace and your eyes.

You take a moment to consider his words before you nod gently in response.

Without wasting any time, Wooyoung takes the chain from your hand, undoing the clasp as he steps in behind you. He can practically feel you shiver against his touch as his fingers brush against the back of your neck, securing the necklace in place in the next moment.

He can’t help it. Wooyoung trails the tips of his fingers of his one hand along the nape of your neck and all the way to your shoulder as he steps around you to see the piece of jewellery now hanging from your neck. The way you shiver once more beneath his touch has the corner of his lips quirking upwards.

Despite the fact that it’s not something that they have gifted you, each male cannot deny how perfectly the jewel suits you. The gem gleams beneath their gaze, seemingly making you shine brighter than before. A fact which makes them swoon for a second time that day.

“Beautiful,” Mingi breathes, a gentle smile gracing his features reflected similarly on all of his brother’s faces.

Again, you avert your gaze, a heat creeping up your neck as you clear your throat. “So, how about that drink, then?”

#yandere ateez #yandere kpop #ateez imagines #ateez scenario #yandere hongjoong #yandere seonghwa #yandere san #yandere wooyoung #yandere mingi #yandere yeosang #yandere jongho #yandere yunho #yunho scenario #jongho scenario #san scenario #mingi scenario #seonghwa scenario #hongjoong scenario #wooyoung scenario #yeosang scenarios #kpop au #kpop scenario #yandere au #demon au

[thesnakeslibrary]

True Zending

Pairings: The Narrator/GN Reader Type: Hurt/Comfort Summary: After suffering through Zending, The Narrator notices crying coming from outside of the game.

" Is it over? It’s going to restart, isn’t it? I’m going back. "

Moments after The Narrator finished speaking, everything faded to black and left the two of them –him and Stanley– back in the office. The Narrator leaned back in his chair, the only sounds in the room being the leather creaking and his breathing. " Why did Stanley have to take that from me? " He let out a frustrated sigh as he shook his head, sitting up straight to begin his repetitive narration. But he couldn't. Stanley was not moving, simply staying in the same spot, frozen.

" Stanley? Are you alright? " Though feeling betrayed and heartbroken, The Narrator still cared for Stanley's emotional well-being. The unusual sound of shaky breathing and crying was all he heard in response to his question, although it hadn't come from Stanley. It sounded like his own narration, not originating from anywhere specific but feeling as though it was coming from inside your head.

That was when he realized it came from the player. It didn't come from Stanley, no, no, no. It came from the person controlling Stanley. It came from you. " Um...player? Are you alright? " He was only met by more shaky sobs. He sighed and pushed some keys on his computer, transporting you into the game somehow. The writer had it carefully set, so you would appear in his office, but the sorrowful sight he saw utterly broke his heart. You, in a tight ball on the floor, hysterically sobbing. "I’m so fuck–fucking sorry, oh my god, I’m so sorry…I didnt want to I prom–promise I didnt, I couldn't do–do anything else the game–the game wouldn't let me I promise im so sorry, I want you happ–happy I promise…"

Apologies poured from your mouth like water from a broken dam, you not having seemed to realize you were directly in the parable. You only became aware of the fact when you felt large hands gently position you upright, the inviting face of The Narrator in front of you. You darted around the room, incredibly confused, "Wha-huh? Why— h–how—?" You sniffled, temporarily distracted from your sorrow and guilt, it was mostly replaced by confusion.

" Shh, shh...you're okay, I'm here. " He extended his arms as an invite for a hug if you desired it, and boy did you. You hastily shuffled towards him and squashed him in a tight bear hug, shedding your tears into his buttoned jacket. The Narrator stroked up and down your back, his other hand running through your disheveled hair. " You're okay, I'm okay. " "But–But I hurt you, I–I, I made you think I’d–I’d rather be dead than play–play your game…I’m so fucking sorr–sorry…" He frowned and tenderly lifted you into his lap, resuming his caressing. " As far as I can tell, you did not want to. You didn't have another possible choice, and I don't condemn you for that. "

Your head was tilted until your eyes met, an ink-stained hand on your cheek, wiping away falling tears. " It is alright. " His soothing voice instantly pacified you, leaning your head into his calloused hand as you shut your eyes. His lips formed a soft smile as he pressed a prolonged kiss to your forehead. You choked back a sob, the key difference between this one and your previous cries being that this one was formed out of joy. The charming man you've been repeatedly playing this game for, the man you've been pinning for, was right here in front of you. You could see and touch him. You no longer have to imagine his appearance.

He did happen to look like you envisioned, though, with short black and gray hair, glasses, and rough yet kind eyes. You leaned forwards and nestled your face into the soft fabric of his turtleneck. You sucked in a deep inhale, melting at the intoxicating scent of the man holding you. Everything about The Narrator was comforting; you couldn't find a single thing you would alter about him. Well, except for the fact that you lived in two separate worlds. Just as you finished that thought, the Brit spoke, " Would you like to stay here, darling? I would thoroughly enjoy your company. "

Good lord, you completely turned into a puddle at his kind words. You nodded, not trusting you would sound put together if you spoke. The taller of the two of you grinned and once again lifted your gaze to meet his, " May I kiss you, my dear? " Fuck, you virtually turned into a ripe tomato at his words. It seemed to delight him quite a bit. You forgot to give him any sort of response, the inquiry seemingly having fried your brain. " Well? " He let out a soft chuckle, lifting a hand to tenderly caress your cheek.

You once again chased after the affectionate touch like a cat, almost purring like one as well. You gave out a faint murmur as a yes, eliciting a smile from the old man. He leaned down to place a loving kiss on your lips, and you happily reciprocated. He would've continued kissing you forever if you didn't need to breathe, reluctantly pulling away. He touched your foreheads together, pure fondness in his eyes. " Lord, I've only properly known you for but a few minutes and I'm already entirely captivated by you. " He smiled in amusement at how his words flustered you. " I suspect you've felt that way about me for much longer, hm? " You nodded and leaned up to kiss him, letting out an annoyed whine at being unable to reach his lips.

He chuckled and bent down to close the gap between you two, placing a gentle hand on the back of your head. " You are truly something irresistible. " He concluded his sentence with a quick peck on your lips. You beamed and wiggled closer to him, resting your head on his chest. He slowly stood up with a groan, carefully holding you in his arms. He strode back around to his desk, seating himself in his worn-out leather chair. He reclined with you in his arms, happier than he had been for a while.

" On second thought, that astral dome was not the sole thing that made me happy. I undoubtedly have that right here in my arms. " If your face could've flushed even more, it would have, you wiggling your legs in ecstatic joy. The Narrator continued, beginning to ramble. " Now that I'm really contemplating it, I suppose I've been infatuated with you since the very start. Ever since I had realized it was not Stanley that I was narrating, it was then I began falling for you. " 

This was exactly something you had been longing for since you initially heard The Narrator's lovely voice. Being comfortably held in his lap while being able to listen to him ramble on to his heart's content. Unfortunately, your ability to listen to him slowly dampened as his velvety voice lulled you to sleep. Once you're just about to cross into the land of dreams, you hear one last thing uttered to you, followed by a fond kiss.

" Rest well, my love. You're safe here in my arms. " The Narrator gave a soft smile as you closed your eyes.

#tsp narrator #tsp #tspud #stanley parable ultra deluxe #the narrator #the narrator x reader #gn reader #gender neutral reader #no y/n #hurt/comfort #the zending #zending #the stanley parable #fanfic #writer #writing

[arioloyal]

Sepandarmazgan

(King baldwin iv x reader part 5)

Warning: none!

How it feels to rest

On your patient lips

To eternal bliss

I'm so glad to know

Today, before sunrise, after the king's suggestion, y/n and baldwin iv left the palace without informing anyone. The hooves of their horses raised dust on the way. They passed everywhere , enjoying the clean air and the absolute silence of the dawn. The crows began to crow and the clothes spread on the ropes in front of the village houses danced and waved in the wind.

Then Baldwin pulled on his horse's reins with one hand and pointed to an oak tree on a hill far away. After getting there, y/n spread the long cloth that was with her under the tree and both of them sat and looked at the sky that was slowly turning to light red and orange.

The sound of adhan came from far away. lady y/n said under her breath: "When I arrived in Jerusalem, I saw this tree on my way first and I sat here. I met someone who said that your sermons can take all the sadness out of any heart, and you know how much I I am a curious person."

Baldwin IV did not respond. He stood there motionless as if he had traveled to another world. His eyes were looking far away. Meanwhile, y/n picked up a large bowl and walked over to the river to fill it with water. she returned and placed a bowl of water and some dates and walnuts in front of him.

:" I was there that day and witnessed all the events.I saw how some templars looked at you. Willingly or unwillingly, you ignite the fire of anger in them. I have no longer the power and ability to suppress them. I don't even like to predict what calamities can befall you. Then I can no longer protect you."

:" I am not an enemy to anyone, I am against the conspiratorial nature of some of them. The world is always full of sinners who wear holiness clothes. Jerusalem is the land of conscience. Sometimes, order, law and words are not enough. The only thing that always It's worth it, it's only love. The love of God . I came here to ask for forgiveness, but I had no idea that I was going to be the king's companion."

"I wish one day I could experience the love like you..."

Lady y/n turned her head, probably so he wouldn't see her laughing. :" If God wills, you will definitely reach it. The place where words lose their meaning."

He took a deep and heavy breath, in this world, they were the only ones who could drive each other crazy out of excitement. Whenever Y/n was with him, she felt like a young girl who was ready to learn new things at any moment, she had the feeling of a caring mother, and she was like a lotus flower that was ready to bloom. She would flourish, she would become a woman.

:"You say that if God wills it for me, I will reach it. What exactly do you mean by that? Does it mean that it is in my destiny?"

Lady y/n nodded and said, "Yes, that counts as well. But we shouldn't have false beliefs about fate. I can't say what fate is, but I can say what it isn't. destiny doesn't mean that the path of our life is predetermined. That a person after every tragedy says, "there is nothing more i can do!This was my destiny" is a sign of ignorance. Destiny is only at the crossroads. It is up to man to choose the path.

In fact, we are neither in control of our lives nor condemned to it.

He moved a little closer to y/n and adjusted the white scarf on her head and tucked her black hair behind her ear. he was close enough that y/n could smell him. The smell of wood, amber and rained soil...

:" I brought you here to ask you an important question. away from everyone. After these events, I have become more determined to protect you at any cost. Now it's your turn to choose between this dilemma. .."

:"Dilemma...?"

:" I saw you as a person who loves not only beauty but also ugliness. I trusted you in any situation because I knew you deserve it. You will one day become a great person in this land. But I'm not here for too long. I will not be there to see that day."

He held her hand, it was pleasantly warm.

:" Jerusalem and I need you and we are fascinated by you in all the way... are you willing to stay here?"

:"Yes, my lord if you wish...!"

:" No hear it all before you answer...

would you marry me?

Lady y/n felt like the blood froze in all her veins for a moment. The world stopped moving. her happiness, like the life of her king, was short. For a moment, she imagined the farewell . that day. which would destroy heart. But she was glad that she could at least have him from now on.

she came here in search of divine love. But at this moment, she was blessed with divine and material love at the same time...

[To be continued]...

#baldwin iv #kingdom of heaven #king baldwin iv #kingdom of heaven 2005 #the leper king #imagine #kingdom of heaven fanfiction #kingdom of heaven fanfic #fan fiction #fandom #medieval #love #aesthetic #ao3 fanfic #baldwin iv x reader #king baldwin iv x reader

[theweeklydiscourse]

The Darkling’s ending in Shadow and Bone season 2 was so excessively cruel that it flattened every bit of complexity Ben Barnes had imbued him with along with the nuance that could have been carried over from the books.

I saw a post on twitter that read something along the lines of “People hate humanizing depictions of abusers because it forces them to exist in a complicated emotional reality that their victims were trapped in for years.” I believe that this passage is emblematic of the approach the writers took to rewriting and adapting the end of Ruin and Rising into the Netflix show.

Now I’ve written at length about how I believe that the “Darkling as an allegory for abusive men” is extremely flawed and ultimately fails to convey the message it wanted to deliver. But interpreting the show through the lens that, in the writers minds, Aleksander is a good and subversive depiction of an abusive man me helps me understand why they rewrote the ending.

In the books, Aleksander’s death is not only written explicitly as a sad (not triumphant) moment, but also an extremely intimate one. At that point, he had essentially given up and surrendered to Alina following the devastating realization that without Alina and Baghra an eternity of suffering and loneliness awaits him. He could never return to the community he had built and protected for decades and this moment is recognized in the text as a tragic culmination of his life of struggles. Of course, this moment is not without its flaws given that it supports the narrative that power = corruption and evil, but it is humanizing regardless. He dies in Alina’s arms in a moment of vulnerability where Alina promises to fulfill his final wish and is allowed to feel saddened by his death.

So of course the Netflix show opted against this. Of course Alina can’t feel any emotions aside from self-righteousness and anger. Of course she must spout a heaping of faux-badass and on the nose lines like “there is no redemption” and “let them come” as she’s impaling him with a sword. OF COURSE she can’t hold him as he’s dying or show a shred of anything that might be construed as sympathy because in the eyes of the writers, that would portray the complicated nature of their relationship.

Alina can’t display any vulnerability or even acknowledge the fact that she killed a persons who she once cared about and had a profound connection with because the writers are so deeply obsessed with anticipating any and every potential criticism of the story that they strip the characters of the little complexity that they already had. I can’t help but feel like the writers were so fixated on the idea of making a powerful statement on “scary manipulative men” that they leaned really hard into Alina being a stoic girl boss who stands up to the evil man and is so freaking badass that her emotions and empathy evaporate.

Really it was an act of cowardice. After all, why take risks and humanise your sympathetic villain when you can just vilify and condemn him for actions that were ultimately for survival?

#shadow and bone #lb critical #s&b critical #alina starkov #s&b netflix #s&b salt #the darkling #darklina #pro darkling #aleksander morozova #ruin and rising #shadow and bone season 2 #the grisha trilogy #grishaverse meta

[cosmicjoke]

Alright, so... Chapter 210 of "Vinland Saga"...

Excuse me a moment while I go cry in a corner.

Shit, man, this chapter got to me hard.

Spoilers ahead, for anyone who hasn't read it.

I'm so scared Thorfinn is going to die. He was shot full of arrows, just like his father. Hild saved him, and my immediate question is, "how?". Did she have to kill to save him? To get him on her back and carry him out? The fact we aren't shown what happened after she shot her arrow makes me think she did. Or did she manage to do it while only wounding the natives? She only had four arrows left, and there were more than four natives in pursuit. If she did have to kill to get him out, then I wonder how that's going to impact Thorfinn himself, assuming he survives. To know Hild will have had to take on that burden, of taking a life to save his, would be devastating to him, I think. In it's own way, it would almost be like a condemnation to him of his pacifist philosophy, that because he didn't want to kill, the burden of it has now fallen to another. I know Thorfinn would blame himself, even though this situation truly wasn't his fault, and spun out of his control due to forces beyond his power.

I really didn't expect this turn of events. I thought Thorfinn and Hild would take care of the pursuers in the forest and then make their way to the village. But Thorfinn clearly has a punctured lung from the arrow he took for Einar, and now he's been shot full of arrows, which, at the moment, I'm honestly having a really hard time seeing how he'll survive. His condition also totally takes him out of the game in terms of defending the village and its people at all.

And now Hild and him are faced with Plmk, and I have no idea if he's hostile or not. If he's hostile, they're fucked, which makes me think he's going to end up helping them, somehow. But even if he does, it doesn't do anything for Thorfinn's condition. Like I said, I'm really scared at this point for him.

And then there was Thorfinn's dream sequence, which was just heartbreaking in the extreme. His vision of Thorkill, basically saying 'I told you so', saying war would come to Vinland, no matter how hard Thorfinn tried to avoid it. And even more devastating, Ivar and then Einar, blaming Thorfinn for everything. We see here in Thorfinn's subconscious his true feelings, rooted in a sense of failure. We see how badly Einar's parting words to him have affected him. Einar's anger and bitterness toward him. I've spoken before about how it would, in many ways, be the ultimate sacrifice to his ideals, if Thorfinn were to lose Einar's friendship, his first and best friend, and the man who gave him a sense of purpose in life beyond his quest for revenge against Askeladd. If Einar truly ends up turning against him, if he refuses to leave, and takes the path of war, I don't see how their friendship can continue. Maybe that will change when he sees Thorfinn's condition, but realistically, I think him seeing what's been done to Thorfinn will only fuel Einar's rage and refusal to give up what they've built.

God, Thorfinn wanted so badly to make a land of peace, to atone for the sins of his past by creating a land of peace and saving more lives than he took, but now it's all gone to hell, and people have been killed. His vision of Einar telling him his experiment has failed, and that it was an important experiment, because it shows how peace can never really be achieved, shows the depths of Thorfinn's despair, I think, and the depths of his self-loathing. This is truly just a tragedy playing out before our eyes.

It's made all the more poignant, I think, by Hild's words to Thorfinn, telling him not to lose heart, telling him he wasn't wrong about anything, and if only the world were full of more people like him, maybe there really could be hope for a world without war. She calls Thorfinn precious, and I think that's true. But tragically, as we're seeing, the world isn't filled with people like Thorfinn, and that makes Thorfinn's dream an impossibility. There's always going to be someone who wants to start a war, there's always going to be someone who wants to take what isn't theirs, there's always going to be someone who wants to hurt you or those you love and care for, no matter how much you try to talk them out of it. The world is too complex and brutal for pacifism to ever be a reality, and that is a tragedy.

I don't know what's going to happen back at the village at this point, either. It seems to me anyone could die. Thorfinn was their best defense, and now he's out of commission.

Ugh, man, this chapter hit me on a deep, emotional level.

Don't die Thorfinn. I'll be devastated if you do.

Also, just again, shout out to Yukimura's art. I don't know how this guy does it month after month. His art is second to none.

#Vinland Saga #chapter 210 #thorfinn karlsefni #hild #einar

[crying-over-really-dumb-things]

Man I don’t think I’ll ever really get over how the movie adaptation kind of ruined how the general public views Dear Evan Hansen.

In the stage musical, the narrative actively portrays what Evan is doing as wrong. There are several instances where Evan will have one of his sweet/motivational moments with Alana or the Murphy family, the moment will be over, and we’re left with only Evan on stage and then the instrumental music will shift keys to remind us that “oh yeah, Evan is lying to a grieving family right now.”

In Act Two he starts to really act like an asshole to the people around him, he stops helping with the Connor Project because he’s got what he wanted, he’s dating Zoe. And it all culminates to Good For You where he is finally called out by the people he’s being horrible to, the consequences of his actions are catching up to him. And he finally finally admits to himself and everyone else that he was lying, he was projecting himself and his own issues onto this imaginary Connor. He fully realizes what he’s doing is wrong and comes clean about it.

And our sympathy for Evan as the audience stems from the fact that he is seventeen, and teenagers will sometimes do horrible things when they’re in a bad state mentally. We as the audience know Evan is wrong and we want him to realize he’s wrong as well, we want him to get help and grow from it.

But then the movie comes in and cuts all the songs and moments where Evan could possibly be condemned by the narrative. All the times Evan is an actual ass are either removed or heavily toned down. Disappear and Good For You are completely removed.

It doesn’t help that they have a 30 something year old man playing the part, our sympathy that mainly stems from him being a child is harder to lean into when we’re looking at a full grown adult. It feels less like the story is saying “look at this kid doing horrible stuff, don’t you want him to stop doing the horrible stuff and get some help?” And more like “look at poor little Evan :( don’t you feel bad for him? Everyone’s so mean to him for no reason :(”

So after all that, people who hadn’t interacted with the stage production and only saw the movie come away from it thinking the show is horrible because Evan was an awful person but the narrative seemed to want us to root for him.

And this isn’t to say that DEH is a perfect show by any means, a lot of the criticism for the movie can easily be leveled at the stage production. I just think the original intent of the show got lost in adaptation, and the show that was fairly well received on its Broadway debut is now widely regarded as just plain bad.

#this was a ramble #dear even hanson #deh #broadway

[comradekatara]

I feel like I see ppl say that ozai is dumb (and I totally get why, because he’s extremely shallow to the point of looking downright foolish) but honestly..... is he?? is ozai dumb, is zhao dumb, is zuko dumb, or all they all just men from the fire nation who were taught to embody a certain aggressive, active, prideful, impulsive, violent, reckless, singleminded mode of masculinity that praised them for certain behaviors and virtues such as strength and power and condemned any man who didn’t align with these values?

ozai is smart enough to seize and maintain power over the fire nation, which is his life’s primary goal. zhao is smart enough to invade the north pole, which was impenetrable for the past century of war, and while destroying the moon obviously is not a sensible thing to do, it does carry out his intended effect, which is to debilitate his enemies and demonstrate the sheer force of his power.

zhao’s lack of accounting for the spirits can be attributed directly to the fact that a key aspect of fire nation propaganda is denying spiritualism to the point where he finds iroh silly for respecting their status in the ecosystem whatsoever. he’s not unintelligent, he’s just ignorant due to his cultural upbringing. of course he has massive blindspots, he was fed fire nation propaganda his whole life, but he would never have risen through the ranks of the fire navy just through ozai’s favor alone.

furthermore, the idea that ozai’s reliance on the women in his family to do his dirty work (ursa killing azulon, azula capturing zuko & iroh and taking ba sing se) is a sign of weakness doesn’t actually hold water. if anything, ozai using women for his own ends and then discarding them once they are no longer useful to him demonstrates his strength as a patriarch.

additionally, the way he banishes zuko by giving him an impossible quest with the promise of return on its completion incentivizes zuko to remain loyal to his nation and his father, instead of simply banishing him with no hope of return, at which point zuko would have nothing to lose in attempting to usurp ozai, which is clearly an anxiety for ozai considering that zuko was banished for threatening treason in the first place. (and note that zuko only does resist ozai once he returns to the fire nation, something azula orchestrated without ozai’s approval. if zuko had stayed in ba sing se as a fugitive it is highly unlikely that he would have ever participated in the avatar’s revolution, but azula wanted her brother to come back home and found a way to make it so.)

ozai is very good at manipulating people, he is a very powerful firebender (think of the way he is able to summon lightning instantly, underground, moments after an eclipse is over, without any sort of warning), and he was very close to winning the war for good only six years into his reign. he is myopic, shallow, egotistical, and generally wrong about many things, but that doesn’t actually make him dumb.

i think he mostly seems dumb because when put next to azula (or iroh, or ursa), he is far less subtle in his intellect. azula is shrewd, calculating, clever, and far less image-obsessed than ozai is. she is completely willing to sublimate herself for the sake of serving her empire, whereas ozai is the empire and therefore must project absolute power at all times. zuko, especially in book 1, is far more like ozai than azula is, which is what makes azula such a threatening villain: the fact that she is a girl is crucial to her character. so many of her traits that make her so much more threatening than anyone else in positions of power throughout the show are directly born out of the fact that despite being raised on the same values, she was socialized differently.

her feminine behaviors and the expectations placed on her as a girl are what make so her anomalous among the myopic, egotistical, prideful, power-hungry fire nation military. she doesn’t care as much about projecting power, so she’s able to get rid of her fancy fleet and recruit mai and ty lee, she’s able to disguise herself to enter ba sing se instead of laying siege to it and successfully takes it over when iroh could not after nearly two years. she does not rely on brute force, but rather “feminine qualities” such as manipulation, calculation, and subterfuge. same goes for mai and ty lee, hence why they are also so powerful despite merely being two non-bending teenage girls. by not being forced into performing those restrictive masculine behaviors, she is able to beat the men at their own game.

similarly, ursa uses poison to kill azulon, an act she does for the benefit of the men in her family (ozai and zuko), through a traditionally feminine weapon. a fire nation man would never think to poison their enemy because that is not how men kill other men. but use a woman as a proxy, and this becomes a sufficiently masculine act through the way in which the man exerts his power over a woman.

iroh uses brute force and projection of power as his primary tactics before his reckoning (see his siege on ba sing se), and manipulation, scheming, disguise, and sublimation to achieve his ends only after he has unlearned fire nation propaganda and gained a broader perspective. sokka is similar in this regard, in that it takes him learning feminine strategies from women warriors (the kyoshi warriors technique is about using their opponents’ force against them) to understand that he needs to prioritize his intellect over brute force if he ever intends to win a single fight. zuko’s blue spirit persona demonstrates his capabilities for being smart in battle, but when he is not inhabiting the blue spirit (his mother’s values), he is channeling ozai, and thus loses fights due to his aggression and impulsivity, which is always used against him.

zuko’s growth involves him improving as a fighter when he sheds the fire nation model of masculinity that values blind rage and aggression, and instead embraces the feminine values of warmth, healing, gentleness, and understanding, which allows him to go toe to toe with azula as someone who has internalized feminine values by virtue of being born a girl: being calculating and precise instead of powerful, manipulative and scheming instead of blunt, and patient instead of impulsive. the final agni kai sees azula prioritizing sheer power as she suffers a nervous breakdown, which zuko and katara are able to use against her in a way that they otherwise could not since she is uniquely impulsive and reckless in this fight (although she is still able to strategize as shown when she points her lightning at katara instead of zuko).

the reason azula seems so much smarter than ozai is because she wasn’t raised to prioritize her own ego above everything else; no, she was raised as a girl, and this social disadvantage also proves to be her greatest strength. the reason iroh seems so much smarter than ozai is because he is willing to embrace multiple ideas about the world, instead of just one. to his credit, ozai is very good at implementing his idea; it’s just that said idea sucks. ozai isn’t dumb, he just has an incredibly limited perspective. he’s great at what he does, which is projecting power. but he has no reason to do anything else, so we really shouldn’t expect him to.

ozai isn’t stupid, he’s just wrong. and yes, there is a difference.

#analysis #hot takes #ozai #azula #zhao #iroh #zuko #wrote this whole thing in a frenzy last night after I saw someone call ozai a dumbass lmao #I mean he is a dumbass but he’s also way smarter and more powerful than I think we want to give him credit for #it’s not his fault his life’s single goal happens to seem very stupid to us #but yeah azulas entire character would simply not work if she wasn’t a girl lol like her gender is so integral to her character #and why every girl in avatar is a better fighter than the big strong powerful masculine men who fight using brute force #toph beats boulder. etc

[red-hot-temper]

Callisto apology

Before I continue interacting in VADD fandom, I would like to share my opinion about Callisto and his controversial first interaction with Penelope:

Callisto did nothing wrong by pointing his sword at Penelope, he was protecting himself because he thought she was a threat.

What I do agree with is that he was a fucking jerk when after the confession he "played" for a while with Penelope and her responses… And I was also a jerk for laughing at that, feeling bad about Penelope's stress, but not regret laughing (Don't play innocent because I know someone else laughed at that too lmao)

So yes, I completely understand if Callisto's taunting bothered you, because he behaved annoyingly, but getting upset that he was on guard? I'm sorry, but I really don't understand that. I know there are people who don't like to see violence, but it makes sense to me that he would react that way. They literally sent him an assassin early on, why wouldn't he still be on alert after that?

The fact is always brushed off as he did it because he was blinded with rage, but then why have a conversation where it's clearly revealed that Callisto is on guard over Penelope's actions?

Penelope was waiting for Callisto, but he wasn't, so it does look suspicious to meet someone who seems to be looking for something or someone insistently (in the novel it was mentioned that Penelope was looking in all directions)

The story is told from the perspective of Penelope/Siyeon and therefore we empathize faster with her and I can understand that anger towards him for our overprotection that we have towards our protagonist, but! The empress sent an assassin to Callisto, he went to his brother's birthday party bringing the murderer's half-dead, he gave a threatening speech disguised as a birthday present and… immediately afterwards, he decapitated the assassin and threw his head at the feet of his brother while the witch empress almost fainted (see later in paragraph "1.") … All while Penelope was witness to it…

So we all know the story: she went after him like yolo, let's find the reset button or die trying. I perfectly understand her point and also the fact that she regrets it later, it's obvious that she's going to try to survive no matter what. But I need to emphasize this, because when she mentions that she "sincerely came to comfort him", we as readers knew that she was lying, but Callisto? I'm 100% sure he was thinking: I cut off someone's head in front of several nobles, and I'm the one who needs to be consoled?

This was why he didn't believe her confession of love, not only because she told him "I like you", but that consolation thing doesn't make sense (and Oh God I can't blame Penny because when you're desperate you make terrible and illogical excuses jksjskjs)

So yeah, I don't condemn the fact that Callisto defended himself, If I were in his position I would do the same, but he was definitely a bastard making Penelope fool.

1. In case you didn't read the first few chapters of the novel and just picked up where the manhwa left off, this happened and was censored in the manhwa:

“So why didn’t you choose a proper attendant, younger brother?”

That was the moment. Seureung----The prince drew his sword in an instant with his empty hand, and cut the assassin's head as he was holding it.

Cheak-! The blood started gushing out like a fountain.

"I'll replace this as a birthday present."

The prince threw the severed head at the feet of the second prince.

"Aaaagh!"

The empress' tearing screams echoed through the banquet hall. The head of a person rolling around like a ball.

The 2nd prince couldn't say anything with a pale face like someone about to pass out.

“If you want to receive another gift from me, send it as many times as you like.”

#callisto regulus #villains are destined to die #death is the only ending for a villainess #death is the only ending for the villainess #death is the only ending for the villain #kallisto regulus #vadd #ditoeftv