#and Im just wondering if my lil short stories will make sense if I use only one name | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

stinkrascal · 3 years

Note

hiiii Jaiden I was wondering if you could tell us about the world/town that the Strauds live in?, I was curious about what world it is in and wanna kno a little about ur world building 👁

ugh tbh im embarrassed at my world building skills lmao, i feel like my worlds never make any sense lmao ;-; i’m still not 100% certain as to what actually constitutes as world building, but i’ll just dump a bunch of my vampire lore here and hope that it suffices, ok? ok <3

world

my sims universe is basically just... the sims worlds, with the inclusion of russia, louisiana, and mississippi, as right now those are the only three irl places where any sims of mine are canonically from. so take that information however you will ;-;.

right now the strauds live in windenburg!! i like to imagine they moved there from forgotten hollow when the twins, anastasia and klaus, became teenagers, and when lil baby ilya was born.

in my story, vlad basically "owns" the town of forgotten hollow, as he was the one who discovered it shortly after becoming a vampire in the 1700s. eventually he allowed the vatore siblings to inhabit the space with him, though only if they recognized him as the rightful owner of the land. for vampires, it's like a show of power, to demonstrate to other vampires that this territory belongs to you and you alone. having many clan members inhabiting your territory is another show of power. typically, vampires like to live in isolation away from humans, preferring the company of other vampires. even in windenburg where the strauds live now, they're in a location that’s isolated, as to avoid interacting with humans. though vlad no longer lives in forgotten hollow, he is still recognized as the land’s owner.

human/vampire relations

supernatural creatures are common in my world, though humans are still considered the dominant species. while humans typically have no issues with witches and elves, they’ve a special animosity towards vampires, for good reason. vampires are the natural predator of humans; in my universe, vampires don’t just drink human blood, they literally eat people lol, so it makes sense that humans are naturally scared of vampires. i explained in a post here how taboo relationships between vampires and humans are, but to summarize, most humans view vampires as man-eating monsters who wish to turn humans into man-eating monsters, and vampires view humans as fragile, short-lived, short-sighted creatures they’re inherently incompatible with because of the vampire’s immortality and physical abilities.

despite the social tension between vampires and humans, they can coexist in society, and vampires are formally recognized as, like, a protected species of sorts (for lack of a better term) in my universe, so humans can’t just needlessly harm vampires for the potential threat they pose. it’s only considered self-defense to harm a vampire if they attack first.

what do vampires eat?

firstly, it’s important to note that vampires can eat human food without causing themselves harm. most vampires continue to eat human food! but human food cannot sustain a vampire; the vampire’s diet must be sustained with blood and flesh.

the easiest option for the modern-day vampire is to feed from animals. the taste isn’t nearly as satisfying as the taste of human blood, and the vampire must consume more animal blood to sustain themselves, but it is an option.

vampires are allowed to drink human blood, but the way in which they drink has to be regulated. if a vampire is hungry, they must find an ethical way to feed, either by drinking from blood packs or drinking from a willing host.

vampires aren’t allowed to consume human flesh under any circumstances.

consequences for harming humans

a vampire caught feeding on the flesh of a human will be executed, no exceptions. there is a loophole, however.

vampires can’t die from hunger; instead, a famished vampire will go into a blackout rage, wherein they lose control of their bodies and become hysterically vicious until their hunger has satiated. when a vampire becomes famished, they’re no longer in control of their actions, so any damage done while in such a state cannot be seriously punished.

however, that doesn’t mean vampires won’t face consequences for going into famine-induced rages. they’re typically dealt with by being put on house arrest for a short period of time, as to minimize their contact with humans. if they offend too many times, vampires can be put on permanent house arrest, but it’s not a common occurrence, and the house arrest isn’t actually permanent! permanent house arrests are lifted typically after a century, as by then the humans who would have been terrorized by the vampire’s actions will have all died, and humans do find it a little excessive to banish an immortal creature for all of eternity. it’s a decent compromise!

vampire magic system

ok bear with me here i’m still trying to develop this lol. there are three main branches of vampiric powers: the strength types, the seduction types, and the sleepy types.

strength vampires specialize in physical combat. they’re incredibly strong, able to support weights far heavier than they are. they’re also the hardest vampires to kill, as they’re especially resilient to damage. some strength types include caspian, lucien, and caleb vatore!

seduction vampires specialize in social interactions. they’ve the ability to charm anyone in their wake, as well as the ability to command and mesmerize humans and weaker vampires around them. seduction types include breanna, anastasia, carlile, and lilith vatore!

sleepy types focus on draining one’s emotions and needs. the sleepy vampires have dampened emotions, and they’re able to keep calm in almost any circumstance. they can deprive the needs of humans and weaker vampires, and much like their name suggests, they can put anyone to sleep almost instantly! sleepy types include klaus and ilya!

though most vampires typically only inhabit one of the three classes, some can inhabit two or all classes! however, this does have a physical affect on the vampire; it’s said that the excessive power “overwhelms” the vampire’s body, causing their skin, and sometimes their hair, to turn grey. this is why humans are especially cautious of the grey vampires; they’re the strongest of all vampires! these vampires include vladislaus (strength + seduction + sleepy type), nikolai (strength + seduction type), and gen (strength + sleepy type)

humans who are turned into vampires can tell which type they’ll be based on how their body reacts to being turned! once turned, the strength types fall into a blackout rage, much like the blackout rage a vampire experiences if famished. seduction types tend to run very high fevers (going into “heat” if you will lmfaooooo). sleepy types fall into a deep, prolonged slumber. a vampire with a combination of these classes will experience a combination of these symptoms. these effects typically only last about a week, and once that period of transformation has passed, they will be back to their normal selves!

vampires/elves

vampires and elves are closely related in my legacy! it’s said that vampires are the descendants of elves, having originated from a single clan of elves who practiced the consumption of human flesh and blood long ago. this supposedly awoke special powers within these individuals, and thus vampires were born!

all vampires are elves, but not all elves are vampires. physically they resemble each other very much, but there are ways to tell them apart. mainly, elves do not have fangs while vampires do; some vampires experience mutations which turns their skin grey, whereas elves do not experience such mutations; vampires eye colors are limited to black, white, red, yellow, and purple, whereas elves’ eyes can be any unnatural color. elves and vampires cannot have natural, human-colored eyes.

elves do not have powers like vampires do, but they are immortal beings who are incredibly difficult to kill, much like the vampire.

the relationship between elves and vampires is far more cordial than the relationship between vampires and humans. however, as elves have become the “favored” species among human society, often negatively pitted against the vampires, elves have begun distancing themselves from their relatives, which has resulted in rising tensions between the two.

any child born from a vampire and an elf will always be born a vampire.

random vampire lore idk if this counts as world building but here u go lol

vampires are ranked as so, from lowest to highest: fledgling, minor, prime, master, and grand master. grand masters often assume roles as mentors and teachers to help train vampires ranked beneath them. the only current grand master in my legacy is vlad!!

vampires aren’t considered dead. instead, they are physically and mentally stunted at whatever age they were turned. just as their bodies stop ageing, their minds also stop ageing, making it incredibly difficult for a vampire to mature past the age they were turned. it can happen, but the process is painfully slow.

a child born from two vampires will stop aging after they’ve reached maturity. those who were born vampires do not experience the symptoms commonly associated with their magical class as they come into the age to use their powers, unlike humans who are turned into vampires.

a child born from a vampire and a human typically will inherent the vampire’s physical characteristics and the vampire’s full powers, and thus live their lives as full-bred vampires, despite their human blood.

however, some children born to vampire/human couples adopt the physical characteristics of the vampire parent, but not their powers, their hunger, or their immortality, functionally making them human, despite their appearance. you can typically tell someone is half-vampire by their teeth! vaughn is a good example; as a half-vampire, he has the eyes and ears of a vampire, but he has no fangs, no powers, and he isn’t immortal.

though incredibly rare, it is possible for a fully-human child to be born of a human and vampire couple.

sometimes, when a blonde human turns into a vampire, they experience marie antoinette syndrome, wherein their hair suddenly turns white! the cause for this is unknown, but so far it’s only an occurrence observed with humans with pale hair who are turned. this explains why breanna’s hair turned white after she was turned!!

conversely, a similar observation has been made with brunette individuals’ hair turning black upon becoming a vampire. this happened with lilith vatore during her transformation! although this occurrence is rarer than the previous example.

OKAY WOW i think that’s everything i have rn... i might add onto this later bc it was really fun to write all this down! i’ve had this in my head for forever, i’ve just never had the opportunity to write it all down heh :’)) hopefully this made sense???!!! and if u actually read this far good job ily lmfao <3

#WOOOOOOOOOOOOOW this took me FOREVER to write ahauahasdfoidghio #im still not sure if everything i wrote counts as world building but !! i tried to include everything yk #sorry for rambling i love to talk lmao ;-;#jade answers #tartiish #straud asks

31 notes · View notes

miss-bvnny · 3 years

Text

Yet another fan tweaks up TLK 2 and TLG: The Squeakel.

Im bored and in a lil pain. time to jot down all my personal ideas/headcanons for how I'd polish up TLK 2 and TLG to fit with the first movie a bit better, and create something more cohesive since like only about 3 people on the TLK2 and TLG teams paid attention to the first movie. I've seen a lot of hedcanons and AUS and whatnot in my day so I've kinda got a good idea of what i like and what I think might work better. Veteran TLK creators please interact with me and gib feedeback on my sick tricks

Uhhh TW for abuse and cub death

So...while there's TECHNICALLY nothing I'd change about the first movie, as it's pretty much done and solid, I wanted to play with my ideas for Zira's backstory.

YES in my version it'd be a one-sided love, kinda like how DemiiDee on dA and Silver-Wolf-17/@mask-of-prime see it, Scar knew she was obsessed with him since the day she met him as a cub, and took advantage of that. After he became king, he wanted loyal lionesses just in case Sarabi, Nala, Sarafina and the others got wise and rebelled. Zira and her pride sisters were all starving, and he knew that. He welcomed them in, promising food and comfort in return for their loyalty. Zira didn't hesitate to agree, and Scar loved her blind adoration of him. He WOULD have liked it if someone like Sarafina was so blindly in love with him (Scar had a gross unrequited obsessive crush on Sarafina growing up, and he constantly held it against her after she chose to be with Nala's father Mega instead. This is another reason why he was so hard on the hunting parties. He used his position as king to get petty revenge on childhood bullies and the like). Scar decided Zira would be his queen but like...ONLY because Sarafina had already made her choice. Zira didn't care, and knew she'd make Scar proud and produce a lot of wonderful heirs for him, in order to repay him for ''all he'd done for her'' (A very thin and insincere ''all'' if you ask me). So, Zira gets pregnant with who will eventually be Nuka, but...Rafiki takes a look at her and sees she's very weak and will probably only have one cub. Oh well. Let's just hope this one son is a suitable heir in Scar's eyes.

....Well-

Nuka's born. Weak, unfocused, and not at all what Scar wanted or was hoping for. He TRIES to teach Nuka and raise him as an Heir, but...it just doesn't work. Scar believes he was destined for greatness and for a prosperous, strong lineage. Nuka is none of those things, and it seems Zira will never be able to give him another heir (I KNOW the ''This woman can't have kids'' trope is icky but HOLD ON wait until you see where I'm going with this) Scar disowns Nuka and scolds Zira for disappointing him. Zira begs for his forgiveness, and swears on her life she'll find a way to make things worth Scar's while.

During this time, several of the male cubs who were born around the same time as Simba are being exiled. Scar doesn't want any males around to threaten overtaking him, and nips the problem in the bud before it ever becomes an issue. Many pride sister saw him doing this, and while they disagreed with it...it DID offer one bonus: Trustworthy males were leaving for better lands. They could take the new young cubs with them, since none of the sisters wanted their children to be raised in Scar's Pridelands.

Surprisingly, one of these lionesses trying to save her cubs...was Zira. Within the last few months, she'd...began to realize perhaps she was looking at Scar with rose-colored glasses. She was beginning to wonder if perhaps she was wrong to worship him the way she did. The thoughts were still kinda...new, and she wasn't sure what to do. But, during all her confusion, she DID happen to meet another male lion. Mpendwa, (Swahili for ''Honey'') was an old friend from her teenage years who was a wanderer by nature. Zira was VERY happy to see him again, after all these years. She met with him in secret, when Scar and the Hyenas weren't looking, and began to fall in love with him. REAL love. Mutual good love, where he loved her for who she was, and NOT what she could give him. Even Nuka seemed to like him, too! And...by some miracle, Zira and Mpendwa had a secret litter together! Four beautiful, healthy little cubs! It was perfect. SO perfect. Perhaps the problem had lain not in Zira, but in Scar the entire time. It served as more confirmation to Zira that...perhaps she was in the wrong to love him. Mpendwa asked her if she and their four cubs would come with him. Somewhere far and somewhere safe, where they could be happy together. Zira...was hesitant, afraid of disappointing Scar further, and even more afraid to leave her pride sisters behind. They were in this because of her, and...there were so many of them that it'd be impossible to get all of them out without Scar seeing something was up. Nevertheless, she knew she had to think about the future of her cubs, and NOT about Scar. She agreed, and plans were made for Zira and Nuka to meet Mpendwa at the border with her four cubs. In the dead of night, they'd leave using the rest of the evacuating males as a cover so they could make a clean getaway.

....Well...to make a very heartbreaking and gruesome story short...Scar knew about Mpendwa the entire time. And of course he saw Zira was pregnant. He overheard their plains to escape, and prepared accordingly. Mpendwa and three of Zira's cubs were killed as punishment for her disloyalty and attempt at mutiny. He lets her keep the youngest one alive as a reminder of her shortcomings, but ONLY if she'll swear her loyalty to him once more. With nothing else left to do, she swore her allegiance to him, and returned to the Pridelands with only Vitani and Nuka left of her family. In the coming days and months, Scar turns up the charm to further entice Zira, making sure she and Vitani are given the best of everything and taken care of, to ensure she feels terrible about what she did and she never acts out again. Sadly, it works, and Zira falls back in love with him, realizing SHE was the one in the wrong, and was an utter fool to betray Scar. Things are....steady for a while. Not bad, not good, but...steady for Zira and Scar. He of course ignores both cubs, and Zira has to reach out to him pleadingly if she wants to connect with him. Zira works as a willing mouthpiece to spout propaganda tot he rest of the pride, assuring then Scar is a GREAT king, their ONLY king, and that he will usher in a new golden age for them all. It pleases Scar and he is sure to...ever so slightly reciprocate his gratitude to her. If only to keep her totally convinced to stay with him. Zira can see he's...flaky and not too sure about her, and decides she MUST act fast to show him she is worthy.

She MUST somehow produce him a viable heir. And quickly. But with all the other males gone, there's not a whole lot of cubs being born. And her beloved Mpendwa is long dead. So...she has to figure something else out. One day, while hunting for Vitani and Nuka on her own, she runs across a skinny dark brown lone lioness taking a dead zebra somewhere. She tells Nuke and Vitani to wait, and begins to stalk this female, named Jibu (''Answer'') Jibu takes her kill to a secluded spot, and Zira notices she's having trouble catching her breath. It doesn't take Zira long to see...Jibu is pregnant. VERY pregnant, and close to giving birth. GIVING birth, actually! She's going into labor. Jibu cries out for mercy, knowing she is alone and there is no one around to help her. Zira, in a moment of maternal instinct and compassion, helps her. She, along with Nuka and Vitani, stay by Jubi's side as she gives birth to one little brown cub. Then, Zira gets...a really really REALLY terrible idea, just looking at the little cub. Calmly, she tells Vitani and Nuka that Jibu will need some water, and that they need to bring some back for her in some fresh moss. It's a big job, and the cubs are BOTH very willing to help. Vitani and Nuka leave on their big mission, and then Zira, Jibu, and the new cub are left alone.

Zira is quick about it. Merciful, even. By the time Nuka and Vitani get back, Jibu is dead. Zira sorrowfully tells the cubs that...the birthing process was simply too much for a weak and skinny loner like her, and that there was nothing at all that could have been done. Nuka asks what they're going to do with the cub, and Zira says she SUPPOSES they could take it back to the pride, as well as the zebra Jibu just killed. They return to the pridelands with food, and...Zira presents the cub to Scar. She tells him that his mother gave birth on the edge of the territory, before succumbing to her dehydration and fatigue. Scar looks the cub over, and is overjoyed. He declares THIS cub, this Kovu, WILL be his heir.

So, time passes, and before you know it, Simba returns. The TRUE Pridelanders rise up and reclaim their land. In the wake of his return, Zira's pride sisters see the error of their ways, and oppose the hyenas in battle. Scar is overthrown, and Simba takes his place as King. Zira is of course horrified, outraged, and...filled with a turmoil of emotions about it. Some part of her feels...free that Scar is gone, but the rest of her was so twisted by his words that she doesn't want to admit she's happy he's dead. She chokes those feelings down, trying to sit still and look pretty for Simba as he moves in. Nuka, Vitani, and little Kovu are doing well, and...as a mother that's all she should care about, really. But...deep down inside, there's a growing, growling, burning need for revenge in her soul.

As Kovu grows a little bigger and the pridelands heal more, Simba and Nala announce the birth of their OWN heir.....Kopa. Yep. Yes. That's right, I'm a Kopa theorist. Upsetting, I know. But like....it makes sense. Look at how overprotective and suffocating Simba was to Kiara in TLK 2. Almost like he'd dealt with tragedy in relation to a cub before, and vowed to never let it happen again. Huh. If YOU'RE reading this and you have no idea who Kopa is and the drama behind his very existence, first of all God I wish I was you, secondly, go here to learn what then entire TLK fandom is divided over:

https://disney.fandom.com/wiki/Kopa

Anyway, Kopa is begins to grow and learn as the next king of Pride Rock, good friends with Nuka and Vitani, and even their cute little brother Kovu. He's not...VERY old right now, but he'll grow and be able to play with them one day! Their mom, Zira, seems....a little upset about stuff. She always watches them from afar, never engages with the rest of the Pride, and doesn't seem to like Simba. Kopa, as a young kid determined to be a great king, takes a note to keep an eye on this. She might be really old, but she's part of his father's kingdom. Everyone else is happy and healthy, she should be too, right? Simba and Nala seem...worried about her as well. For different reasons, but yeah.

Ever the hunter and woman scorned, Zira has been...studying Kopa. He's young and naive, but...eager to learn and take over for his father. He's studious and intuitive, often finding trouble without meaning to, because he was trying to solve a problem or get involved in pride politics. Of course, all the other lions and creatures love him, and are eager to see him grow into a fine future king. There s NO doubt he's a jewel in his family's crown. But...he is still a cub. Zira remembers how devastated she was to lose Vitani's three siblings, and knows that Simba and Nala will be equally devastated if....something happens to Kopa. She knows exactly how she's going to avenge Scar now.

Simba and Nala were out on a little moonlight hunt together one night, like they enjoyed to do together. They were coming back to Pride Rock afterwards, only to hear a terrible commotion. Zazu rushed to meet them, telling of something terrible that had just happened: Zira tried to assassinate the young prince. Her pride sisters were now in arms against Sarabi and her pride sisters, trying to stop an attempted uprising. Simba and Nala quickly joined in to fight, Simba finding Zira with Kopa in her jaws. He stops her, and Timon and Pumbaa are quick to get Kopa to Rafiki for healing. Simba and Nala face off against Zira while she gives her side of the story. telling about how she's tired of being docile and pretending her heart isn't broken after Simba and Nala both took everything from her. Simba and Nala both see she's still...terribly twisted by Scar's words, trying to be patient but firm with her as they attempt to talk her down. She won't have it, and leaps at Simba, Nala gets involved, and they fight her off. Simba calls for her banishment, and she is thrown out of the Pridelands with the rest of her followers, and her three cubs.

During all of this, Rafiki is attending to Kopa and his injuries. They're...bad, but not fatal. With time, he'll be just fine. Zira left him blind in one eye, gave him a terribly ripped ear, nearly tore his tail off, and he's got a deep throat scar that will alter his voice quite a bit. With time he'll be alright physically, but...I'm not so sure about mentally. Kopa has...a LOT of PTSD over it. blaming himself for how he thought Zira was a friend he could help, wondering if he was stupid for never seeing her anger sooner. He begins to question his abilities as a future king. Yes, he's still young, and accidents happen, but...this event has left him a bit jaded all the same. Simba and Nala see it, and...want to do the best for their son. They can see the enthusiasm in his eyes to one day be king fading. It's devastating. And...while Simba isn't about to give up on him, he doesn't want to force Kopa into something he...clearly doesn't want to do anymore. On top of that...Simba fears Kopa may not be safe in the Pridelands anymore. Zira and her followers ARE in the Outlands, but...Zira is bold and full of hate. There's no telling what she could do next. After a lot of deliberation, meeting with Zazu, Nala, and Kopa...the king comes to a conclusion. He strips Kopa of his title as an heir, and sends him to live in the Oasis with Ma, Uncle Max, and the rest of Timon's family. He'll be safe and well-fed there, far away from Zira. It'll only be for a while, until the trouble with the outlanders settles down, and until Kopa is ready to return home. Kopa agrees to the idea whole-heartledy, and departs for the Oasis as soon as he's fit to travel. It's...painful and hard, but it's the best option for their son's mental health. Simba and Nala do visit often, and are glad to see it DOES seem to be working.

Okay. So Zira tried to kill Kopa in the name of Scar, got herself booted, and the origins of her three cubs have been dealt with. That's all the Zira/Scar and Kopa backstory stuff done and dealt with. I'm gonna cut it right here since this is gettin awful lengthy, and continue with TLK 2 and The Lion Guard in a part 2. Keep an eye out for that one.

#the lion king #the lion king 2 #neato after dark

9 notes · View notes

psychedellic-phase · 4 years

Text

Fifteen (pt 13)

(gif by me! I use the iphone app momento)

tw: language, angst, mentions of drug use (relapse), mentions of miscarriage

word count: 7.3k (im sorry)

masterlist

series masterlist

Spencer got up from the cold tile floor, fuzzy unicorn in hand, and faced the window above the kitchen sink. He stared out of it, admiring the snow that was still falling lightly, wondering if it was raining in Seattle. His memory flashed to the last time he stood in the rain with you, but he tried to shake the images away. Instead he watched the snowflakes hit his windowpanes and melt. He hoped that maybe you were somewhere staring out of a window, admiring the dreary weather, and thinking of him too.

He found his place against the dishwasher again, sliding down as his mismatched socks gave way so he could stretch his long legs out fully. He pulled the nearly empty box onto his lap and appreciated the light weight of it, as he continued with his twelfth letter and thirteenth item. Thirteen, a number whose history of unluckiness stems all the way back to the thirteen attendees of the Last Supper, and tracks through the number of steps leading up to the gallows, all the way to the number of letters in the names of some of the most infamous criminals.

Thirteen was a haunted number, which rightly accompanied a haunting letter.

“This one’s long. It’s a month of tarnished memories packed into a few pieces of paper. So far I’ve gone through half of a college-ruled one subject notebook and I’ve had to change pens twice. It’s nearing 2:30, and the wine is finally hitting my empty stomach. Sorry in advance for the way my handwriting will be. I’ll try to make this make as much sense as I can.

If you look at your thirteenth item it is the notepad I stole from that resort in Florida. There isn’t much around to signify this letter. You don’t keep mementos from one of the saddest days of your life, but for some reason I took this useless paper and shoved it in my purse on my way out. Good thing I did, or you’d have no item to attach to these memories. Though I suppose that might be better.

The resort was where we were going to be at for our ‘babymoon,’ whatever that is. What a dumb idea, I’m still mad at myself for letting Garcia talk us into one. She just made it sound so appealing.

Once everyone knew I was pregnant, Hotch pretty much sat me in Quantico with Penelope. There were a few local cases where I was lucky enough to go visit the ME’s office, but usually I kicked my feet up in her lair while you were out in the field.

“A what?” I said one day as she ran DNA through CODIS. The two of us were drinking herbal tea, and I was barely 16 weeks. I just looked like I had a big lunch in my stomach, not a baby the size of an avocado.

“A babymoon. It’s like a honeymoon, but you go when you’re pregnant. It’s one last trip for mommy and daddy to go on and spend quality time together. How many trips have you and Dad-Wonder even been on?”

I shrugged. We didn’t travel much for pleasure. We traveled for work, so on our rare days off we liked to be at home.

“I mean we’ve gone to Vegas and Connecticut a few times.”

She rolled her eyes, “Visiting family, my dear, is not a vacation! I was thinking you two would go to the beach. You guys relax and wade in the ocean and Spencer can build sandcastles that defy every law of physics!”

I laughed at that. You and the beach? It just didn’t feel natural to me. Probably because you aren’t capable of actually relaxing.

“That does sound fun,” I said and I spoke to my barely there stomach, “And it would make daddy take a few days off.”

Penelope squealed and started clicking at her computer, “I’ll find a resort online right now! Okay so how about Marco Island? It’s gorgeous and in Florida, so it’ll be like eighty and sunny, even in the beginning of December.”

“I’ll have to talk to Spence about it. I mean I know it would be fun and all but we really should be saving money for a crib, and car seat, and bassinet, and high chair, and a rocking chair, and a baby swing, and a—“

Garcia stopped me from spiraling out of control, “That is why you throw a huge baby shower! People buy those things for you.”

I rubbed my tummy again, “Oh no, Daddy is very particular about what things are bought.”

“That’s why you have a registry, Momma Bear. Now, no more excuses.”

Before I could even call you, she had put in both of our requests for days off and we had a week long reservation at this fancy resort that you see listed at the top of this notepad, the “Crystal Cove”.

I was only slightly mortified that she did all this without me asking you. Mostly, I was happy. I was afraid you wouldn’t say yes, but if PG already booked it, you kind of had to agree. And to my surprise, you did.

When you got back from that case we were at home, you eating something I had poorly made from a random cookbook on a shelf. I had decided to start cooking more, so I could make homemade meals. I wanted to be that mom who cuts sandwiches into flower shapes and always has fresh baked bread and cookies laying around. I wanted us to be those parents; the ones who are so sickeningly in love that their kids roll their eyes every time they kiss. We were those parents, kind of, if we could even be considered ‘parents.’ At that point, I don’t think we were. But we were definitely in tooth-rotting, sickeningly sweet love.

“So, I have a surprise for you,” I said, coming up behind you and rustling your hair.

“Hm?” You said, stuffing your face like you hadn’t eaten in days. You probably hadn’t. You’re the king of forgetting to eat. Maybe that’s how you stay so skinny.

“I booked a trip, well I guess technically Garcia did.”

“A trip?” You raised an eyebrow.

“Yeah, a trip, to the beach. Penelope called it a ‘babymoon.’”

You laughed, “A babymoon? I’m not familiar."

I smiled and sat across from you, “It’s like a honeymoon, except it's just me and you relaxing and spending quality time together before this lil dude makes his appearance.”

You smiled, “I’m telling you, it’s a girl.”

I rolled my eyes, “It’s definitely a boy, but stop ignoring my offer.”

“Well, it’s not really an offer so much as it is you telling me that we’re doing this.”

“Okay, yes Garcia helped me book it already, and yes she put in our requests for days off, but you can say no.”

You did your little nose twitch scrunch thing, “I’d never say no to quality time with you, Love.”

You leaned over and kissed me, and I squealed, “I’m so excited! I have to buy maternity bathing suits now! Oh and a sunhat!””

Spencer smiled fondly, recounting that day. He was thrilled to go, minus the part where he’d have to wear shorts, and flip flops. Something about the piece that goes between your toes makes him squeamish. He was looking for the right opportunity to use something special he had bought for you, and you had just given him it. A week on a beautiful beach with the love of his life? That would be the perfect time to ask you what he had been waiting to ask you since JJ’s wedding. He was going to take Hotch’s advice; stop waiting, start doing, and get down on one knee with a blue velvet box.

He never got the chance to. The trip was supposed to be in the beginning of December, around your week twenty-four. You never got that far.

He got up from the ground, immediately digging around in a drawer full of pencils and compasses and rulers, finding the blue box in a corner. It was covered in pencil shavings and dust. He hadn’t looked at it in months. He held it delicately in his hands before opening it.

It was plain, but he remembered you said that was what you wanted.

“Oval, of course and silver,” You had explained to Penelope and JJ at a night out years ago. Derek and Spencer sat on the opposite side of the table, but his ears perked up at the mention of rings.

“I like just the band,” JJ said, admiring her own ring, “And I have Henry’s birthstone, the citrine, so I didn’t need another one.”

“What kind of stone Y/N? I’d love a pink diamond! Or a ruby! Imagine!” Penelope gushed.

You shook your head, “I’d take cubic zirconia, if it was coming from the right guy.”

Both Penelope and JJ stuck their tongues out, “Nuh-uh!” Garcia said, grabbing her phone to scroll through more pinterest photos.

“Spence will be getting you a diamond.”

You rolled your eyes and whispered, “Don’t jinx it JJ! And I don’t want a diamond.”

Her mouth dropped, “No diamond? Really.”

“Diamonds aren’t ethically sourced.”

“Lab grown! Get lab grown!” PG piped it, showing you a picture of a ring, just an oval in a plain silver setting.

“That! That’s the one!” You said and Garcia giggled, going on a rant about her dream wedding.

Spencer had gotten that exact ring. Lab grown, oval, classic, beautiful. It was what you wanted, and you deserved everything you ever wanted.

Spencer looked at the notepad. He could tell you had a hard time picking an item for this letter. He knows this letter is the end, the other two are the epilogue of a story he wishes you kept writing. Crystal Cove is the place where he had planned on asking you to marry him, but it ended up being the place where your love story ended. He tossed the notebook to the side and decided that the souvenir for this letter was now going to be this ring. This ring that sparkled and shined, even in the dull incandescent lights of his kitchen. This ring that belonged on your finger, and not in the back of a drawer. This ring that you didn’t even know existed, but if you had, maybe you’d still be together.

“I did buy three maternity bathing suits, and you bought shorts. Spencer Reid in shorts. It was going to be the best trip ever. We were going to snorkel and look at sea turtles and sunbathe and drink virgin piña coladas by the ocean. We were going to get couples massages and spend every moment loving and appreciating each other.

The actual trip? Much different than the one we had planned on paper, but let’s first discuss that time between the hospital and the trip.

It was four weeks. Four weeks of me sitting at home while you were off at work. Four weeks of the door opening and Derek walking through, not you. And on the odd chance that it was you opening the door, you’d be appearing at odd hours of the night to grab a new suit or a file or a snack and then getting back in your shitty car and going to your apartment. Each time I heard that comforting sound of your satchel hitting the floor, I’d crawl out of the cave of blankets I was in to find you, and you’d act like I wasn’t even there.

For the first few days, you asked me how I was and if I was feeling better, then you’d check your phone and wave goodbye. After that, I was lucky if you’d say hello, then I was lucky if I even got a glimpse of you. You never held me. You never kissed me. You never told me you loved me.

I got all my information about you from Derek. Every day I texted you, “Have a good day at work! Talk soon?” And everyday you didn’t answer, so I’d ask Derek if you were okay. He’d always tell me what you were doing. Usually you would take a stack of files of cases to a dark room and make preliminary profiles to send back to the departments, alone. I’d tell him thank you, and the next day would be the same nonsense.

Those four weeks dragged. It was like every minute was an hour and everyday was a year. I was healing, even without you, everyday I felt better and better. But that’s relative to the day before. I haven’t felt ‘good’ yet. I haven’t felt ‘happiness’ yet. But I will. And I’m counting on that.

My mandatory leave was four weeks, and at the end of that Hotch called me in for a ‘mandatory psychological evaluation.’ I didn’t tell you about it because you weren’t speaking to me, and even when you did you were angry and snappy and rude.

I didn’t pass the evaluation. Even though the BAU wrote those damn questions, I still didn’t pass. When my four weeks were up, you were expecting me at work, and I never showed. You didn’t notice how not okay I was because you were too busy handling your own feelings, which I understand. You have to take care of yourself first, deal with your own trauma before touching anyone else’s. So, your trauma was none of my business, a concept you should've applied to my healing process.

I was supposed to come back on a Monday and when I didn’t show you came to the house. You opened the door and yelled my name. It was a sound I hadn’t heard in weeks, and it felt good. I thought you had finally come home. I thought you were finally ready to heal with me, but you weren’t. You were there to judge me.

I think I ran to where you were, a smile on my face that I didn’t think I was capable of making, “Hey!”

You looked so put together in a neatly pressed suit, but your eyes exposed you. They were bloodshot and the bags were so large they almost reached the end of your nose. I had on one of your shirts; it was comforting at the time. Not so much anymore.

You looked me up and down, a small scowl forming on your face, “Where were you today?”

I took a deep breath, and I lied, because lying to you felt easier than telling you the truth. The truth that I was not deemed stable enough to come back, even though I wanted to. I needed to be distracted. I was ashamed, scared, confused.

“I-I didn’t go.”

“Didn’t go? You’ll get fired Y/N.”

I sighed, “No, my leave got extended.”

I could feel the way your eyes bore into my skull as I dodged eye contact.

“Extended?! It’s been four weeks.”

“I’m not ready!” I desperately wanted you to see through it. I thought I was ready, but the papers disagreed.

“Hotch let you do that?” Your voice was increasing and I found myself inching away from you.

“He encouraged it!” Another lie. He didn’t ‘encourage’ it. He forced me.

You rolled your eyes, grabbing your bag and opening the door again.

“You’re leaving? Spencer c’mon I-”

You cut me off by slamming that door in my face.

That’s when I started closing myself off. I started dreading the sound of your feet against the floor at three am. I started to put my own walls up, but they would dull in comparison to the Great Wall of Spencer you built around yourself to keep me out.”

Spencer was always good at putting walls up. In fact, you were the only person to ever get him to take (almost) all of them down. There’s a side of him he doesn’t show anyone, a side of him that he reserves for himself, and when something happens, that’s where he goes. He goes to the corner of his brain where he feels safe, and the walls come up to protect him.

And in those last four weeks, he did just that. He put the walls up, shut you out, and decided that was better. Except it wasn’t better, it just was easier. It was easier for him to bypass you and find a new outfit for work tomorrow. It was easier for him to disappear in the office until the odd hours of the morning. It was easier for him to hide away from you, because when he’s exposed he always gets hurt. It was easier to act like everything was fine, even though everything was the opposite of fine.

He never needed to go to the house, part of him was drawn there like a moth to a lantern. He was drawn to you. As much as he didn’t want to see those four walls, he still needed to check on you. He just did it in his own damaged way. He’d get a glimpse of you in old sweats and a shirt with a hole in it, hair a mess and mascara from two weeks ago adding to your eye bags and he’d be reminded that he couldn’t be there for you. He would never be enough, and he’d retreat into the comfort of solitude.

He was so preoccupied with being hurt, that he didn’t realize just how much he hurt you too.

“I had forgotten about the stupid trip, and so had you. You were too preoccupied with work and not speaking to me and I was preoccupied with crying and trying to speak to you. I only remembered the trip when I got an email from the airline about the flight, they had to move our seats or something stupid. I decided that was a reason for you to actually need to speak to me like I was a person, so I took advantage of it.

I intercepted you at home one day. I had been sitting in the kitchen waiting for you. You came home at two am.

“Hey,” I said, immediately as you walked through the door. You looked surprised that I was up.

“Hi, I’m just gonna—“

“Spencer, stop. We have to talk.”

You crossed your arms, not leaving the threshold of the door, “No. I told you a million times Y/N, I don’t want to talk.”

“Not about...” I couldn’t find the words and you started up the stairs.

“Are we going on this damn trip or not?” I said, my voice cracking from lack of use.

You stopped, looking over the banister at me, “You didn’t cancel it?”

“I didn’t think of it until now. We’re supposed to leave in two days.”

You groaned, “Why didn’t you cancel it?”

I threw my hands up. As if all of this was my responsibility?

“I was preoccupied! Did you cancel your days off?”

You shook your head, rubbing your face, “No, God. Can we still get a refund?”

I was hurt that you didn’t want to go, but not surprised. As I stared at the front door from my spot at the kitchen table I decided that I was going to go no matter what. It was going to be refreshing to look at the ocean instead of an empty nursery. That would be my distraction.

“I-I’m going. I’ll pay for your half, but I’m going. I’m losing my mind here, Spence.”

You looked at me again, still contemplating your options.

“I get it, okay? You can’t be in this house, but neither can I. Maybe we can talk and stuff on neutral ground. I-I just want you there with me, the way it was supposed to be.”

Then you took me by surprise, you nodded, “Yeah, yeah we’ll go.”

I’m sure I lit up like Rockefeller Center at Christmas, “Really?”

You rubbed your eyes, “Yeah, we can go Y/N.”

I was feeling lucky, so I pushed it, too hard, “Are you staying tonight?”

Your voice went from sleepy to sour, “No.”

And you vanished up the stairs, taking all my hope in us with you.

I knew deep down it wouldn’t end well. I knew it was going to be fighting and yelling and arguing, but any time with you was good time with you at that point. And I favored the little bit of serotonin and dopamine you flood my brain with as opposed to staring at the gray walls of the kitchen alone.”

Spencer only agreed to go because he thought he was getting there. Everyday he felt a little better when he’d walk through the door, but he still wasn’t ready. He thought a week of no work and no one to talk to except you would bring the walls down. This would finally be the catalyst in a reaction that was taking far too long to complete. He also couldn’t stand the thought of you flying and spending a week alone. He felt better about you being alone here because you weren’t really alone. You had Derek visiting, Garcia dropping off baskets, phone calls from Emily, the odd visit from Rossi, and apparently phone calls to Hotch, but on that island you’d really be alone, and he was worried about how you’d handle it.

“So two days later we got on a three hour flight to Miami, and I drove our rental car to this resort. We didn’t talk much the whole time, besides some small talk about the flight and other odd comments. It was painfully awkward, and I regretted even coming.

We didn’t speak until I used the keycard to open the door, and we stared at the one king sized bed in the room.

“Oh,” was all you said when you realized you’d have to share with me.

“What?”

“There’s only one bed.”

I rolled my eyes, “Spencer, we’ve shared a bed for three years.”

You just stood at the door with your hands fidgeting on the handle of the suitcase, “I’ll call down and ask for a cot to be brought up.”

“A cot? Are you serious?” I couldn’t believe you, “Why come if you wouldn’t even share a bed with me? I said I’d be fine alone.”

You opened your mouth to speak, but changed your mind.

“Great communication skills Spence. Really, I’m impressed.” You rolled your eyes and finally started to unpack your bag, “I came because I was worried about what you’d do here all alone.”

Part of me was happy you were worried, but a bigger part was annoyed, “I’ve been handling being alone fine, thanks.”

You scoffed, “Yeah. That’s why you need Derek to bring you food everyday, because you’re doing so well.”

I bit my tongue and tried to speak calmly, “Well at least someone checks on me everyday.”

That shut you right up.

The three days you were there went as follows: we slept as far apart from each other as we could, despite how badly I wanted to cuddle into your arms. We’d get up in silence, eat breakfast in silence, walk to the beach and read in silence, eat lunch and dinner in silence, and each night we’d yell at each other until we fell asleep on opposite sides of the bed.

Remember what I said to trigger the fight on December third, your last day there? How could you forget? It’s the fight that broke us up.

“So, I was thinking of going to a counselor,” I said, staring at the waves lap the sand from the balcony of our room. The air felt cold for eighty degrees. But maybe that was just because the air between me and you had been cold for weeks.

You were sitting next to me, but I could tell you were worlds away.

“Spence,” I nudged, trying to snap you out of your daydream.

“Hm? What?”

“I said I’m going to go to a counselor.”

You twisted your face, “A counselor? What for?”

I shrugged, “I-I think it’d be good for me. It’s a grief counselor.”

You turned to look at me, your brow covered in sweat and your eyes watery. You were incessantly bouncing your left leg, rubbing at your nose, and you seemed disinterested in every single thing I was saying or doing. In fact, you’d been acting that way since the first day you disappeared to your apartment.

“Counselor? Yeah,” You were fidgeting, barely making eye contact.

A feeling I can only describe as pure dread formed in my stomach. I thought I might puke, but I swallowed the feeling and kept talking, “I got a recommendation from Hotch. He said he went to Dr. Stevens after Haley died. He said it really helped.”

You were still not listening.

“I think it’d be good if we went together.”

That finally got your undivided attention. “Together?” You snapped, “No.”

“Why not?” I said it with an air of exhaustion and despair. I was tired of this. So fucking tired of it.

“I’m not going to a damn therapist, Y/N,” You seethed, your metal deck chair scraping against the concrete as you stood in front of me.

The sky looked stormy, palm trees whipping in the wind as you came before me. The bags under your eyes looked like bruises, and you had on sleeves. It was eighty and you had on sleeves.

“Okay, I’ll go alone then. I think he could really help us though.”

I was giving up on fighting. I didn’t understand how when I was at my absolute low you could just keep kicking me while I was down. All I wanted was for you to go to someone and talk about it. That’s it. You were acting like I’d asked you to move a mountain for me, which, might I add, at one point you would have done.

“He? You really think a male therapist is going to help? You lost a baby, Y/N—“

“WE,” I clarified, for what felt like the fiftieth time, “We lost a baby.”

You rolled your eyes and ignored me, “You lost a baby. How does a male therapist help you through that?”

I was angry now. It was bubbling up to the top and I thought I might explode.

“He’s a grief counselor! He’ll help me through my GRIEF! And I think you should go because clearly you have a lot going on. You always have! You should’ve been seeing someone for years.”

“Oh, I have a lot going on?” You sneered, “Of course I have a lot going on! I go to work everyday to bring you home a paycheck so you can sit around all day and do nothing.”

I stood up, got close to your face, “I’m on leave.”

“Yeah, sure, keep telling yourself that.”

You bypassed me and went inside, and my hot anger turned into wet anger and fat tears were rolling down my cheeks.

“Do you know how traumatic this was on my body? Do you? Everything hurts and you were supposed to be there! You were supposed to take four weeks off too! You were supposed to be there for me!”

“Yeah and who’s there for me!” You yelled, louder than I think you ever had; at me at least. You had thrown your suitcase on the bed, haphazardly grabbing your clothes from the drawers and shoving them in.

“I would’ve been,” I said softly, coming up behind you to grab your arm lightly, “If you had let me.”

You pulled back, “Don’t touch me!”

I reached up to wipe my eyes and crossed my arms in front of myself defensively, “I want to be there for you, Spencer. I do. Why won’t you let me?”

You didn’t answer, because even you didn’t know why. You just stood over the suitcase, one arm on either side of it, hair matted to your sweaty face, panting and panting.

The facts I had chosen to ignore were staring me in the face again. Or maybe I was just that oblivious.

“I’ve never seen you like this. This isn’t you, Love,” I tried to say in my most soothing voice. The dread had clawed its way back up to the back of my throat.

“Or maybe this is me,” you said softly, and I swear you were crying. Or maybe I hoped you were, that way we were both sobbing. That’s as close to togetherness as we could get.

“Maybe this is who I am now, or who I’ve been all along.”

I reached out for you again, but stopped myself, “No, Spencer. The real you isn’t this angry, and bitter, and mean.”

You slammed your hands against the bed, “Yes it is!”

“Is that what you’ve been doing all this time?” I said sadly, shaky breaths between words, “Is that what you’ve been going to your apartment and doing?”

You turned around, skin sweaty and eyes red, “What? What are you talking about now? God, do you ever stop talking?”

I snapped, ignoring your last jab there, “Are you using?”

Your face contorted into a sour expression, “Am I using?”

“Yeah, Spencer! Are you? Because I can’t see any other reason for why you’re so irritable and sweaty and out of it! So I’ll ask you again, are you going through withdrawal?”

You looked like I had literally punched you in the gut, and I kind of had. It was a low blow, I’ll admit it, but I was seriously worried about you. If an event would trigger you, this would’ve been it.

“What? No!”

I wasn’t sure whether or not I should believe you, but I knew I had to support you either way. I love you, even when you’re angry at me, I still love you. Even when you throw clothes and seethe at me through gritted teeth, I still love you. That’s my fatal flaw. No matter how many reasons you give me to stop loving you, I never will.”

Spencer let out a shaky breath, lower lip pinched between his teeth. Was he really that terrible? He didn’t remember being so spiteful. Reading it back, he understood why you thought he was high, and he had thought about it more than he cared to admit. But he hadn’t touched the stuff in seven years, and he wasn’t about to start again now.

‘No matter how many reasons you give me to stop loving you, I never will.’

That line made him want to cry, hands clenching the ring box as if it were a stress ball. That line simultaneously felt like a stab in the gut and a breath of fresh air. He had given you so many reasons to walk away, and the one reason to stay was there in his palm, unused.

““It’s okay if you are. I understand this is a... hard time. I’ll support you through this,” I put my hands out to touch your chest.

“I’m not high and haven’t been in years!” You swatted my hands down.

“Then what the hell is going on!?”

“I’m angry and I’m sad and I’m heartbroken!” You yelled, going back out onto the balcony to stand in the rain that had started pouring down in sheets.

“Spencer! Stop!” I followed you out, tears mixing with rain to the point that I didn’t know which was which.

“I’m just confused! It’s hard to see the point in all this anymore. Maybe it’s just not worth it,” You said, yelling at the ocean not at me. Rain soaked our clothes instantly. Part of me was hoping this scene would end like the ‘notebook’ we’d kiss and you’d spin me around. I guess this is kind of like the notebook, it’s a story to help you remember us. Except you don’t have Alzheimer’s and I wrote 15 letters, not 365.

“Maybe what’s not worth it?” I was yelling too, just so you could hear me over the sound of the wind and the rain.

“This!” You gestured between us. I felt like you knocked the air out of me, my whole body stinging.

“But I love you!”

“All of this has made me realize that love isn’t everything! I love you too but we need more than that!”

That was the first time I’d heard you say ‘I love you’ in a month, but it was a double edged sword. I bit my lip so hard I think I started bleeding, “Love isn’t enough? Are you kidding me, Spencer?”

You swallowed thickly, “No! I’m not kidding. I’ve never been more serious!”

“So what? That’s it?” I said it quietly, but I wanted to scream at you. I wanted to scream that you were being an idiot. You were being ridiculous. You were being unnecessarily cruel. But I didn’t. I was tired and water logged. I had finally given up.

You ran your hands through your hair, “No–it’s–we we aren’t over Y/N. I’m just saying that it’s gonna take more than love to fix us.”

“Well maybe if you were ever home, we could actually try. But you aren’t. You’re always gone! So explain to me how we’re going to fix this. What’s it gonna take Spencer? What do you want from me?”

You took a deep breath, uttering words I was so sick of hearing, “We need space and time.”

“Space? Time? It’s been a month Spencer! I let you go to work. I let you spend every day at your damn apartment. I stopped calling. I stopped checking in. How much more space and time do you want?”

“Thirty-four days,” you mumbled, just so I could barely hear. The thunder rolled, mostly drowning it out.

“What was that?”

“It’s been THIRTY-FOUR days, Y/N. Thirty-four. I don’t know how you expect me to be okay after only thirty-four days.”

“I don’t expect you to be fine! I expect you to speak to me! To look at me! I want to go to bed crying and have you there next to me. I want to be there for you when you’re crying. The only way we get better is if we do this TOGETHER!”

The anger looked like it melted off of you, and I took that as my opportunity to approach. I threw my arms around your soaked body as you shook with sobs into my shoulder. I held you like my life depended on it, because in a way it did. You wrapped your arms around me too, and everything felt okay. We were standing in the pouring rain, holding each other as we cried, and somehow I felt more okay than I had in the thirty-four days prior. It felt like maybe you were coming back to me.

You weren’t.

We stood like that for what felt like hours, and eventually I pulled you inside. I wish I didn’t. I wish we stayed there, holding each other in the rain until the sun came up and dried us off. I foolishly thought the rain washed our sins away.

“It’s going to be okay,” I said, my head on your shoulder as we wrapped ourselves in towels, “I promise.”

You shrugged me off of you, going back to packing your bag.

“Spencer, stop packing, please,” I begged, grabbing the items you were putting in and taking them back out.

“I don’t want to be here anymore,” you said plainly, taking a shirt and putting it back in.

“I-I thought—“

“Thought what, Y/N? That because I cried to you and told you I loved you that we were magically okay?”

I stammered, “No. No! But I thought it meant we were in this together now.”

“You just accused me of relapsing an hour ago.”

“And I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that, but that’s not a reason you should go,” I pleaded, reaching for you again. I thought if you walked away I’d never see you again.

“You don’t trust me,” your voice cracked.

“No, Love, I—“

“Don’t call me that.”

The pain in my chest bloomed, sending a wave of heartache through my entire body. A heartache I still haven’t been able to shake. It’s still there. Some days it's a thunder crack and sometimes it's a low grumble, but it’s always there. The rain hasn't stopped.

I hadn’t even realized that you were completely packed until you zipped the suitcase shut.

“You’re really leaving?”

You stopped at the door, hand on the handle, to turn and face me. I didn’t need to use my profiling skills to see how much pain you were in, and my pain doubled at the sight. I’ve always been an empath when it comes to you, feeling what you feel like it’s my own.

“I am.”

I crossed the room and threw my arms around you, sobbing into your chest. To my surprise, you wrapped your arms around me lightly.

“I understand,” I said, looking into your eyes, “We can’t be there for each other the way we need to.”

You nodded into my shoulder, “Stay. When you get home from this we’ll talk. I just need a few more days.”

I shook my head, finally coming to the realization that we didn’t work anymore. We weren’t healthy anymore.

“Don’t bother. The writing’s on the wall, Spence,” my voice wavered, and I regretted every word as they left my mouth, “I’ve been waiting for that person from the hospital to come home to me. I’ve been waiting for the Spencer who lends me his shirts and fact dumps and eats IHOP and ice cream with me to come home.”

I felt your breath stop under my arms, “But that Spencer, the Spencer I love, isn’t here anymore. We need to be alone.”

I felt you shake with tears under me, and that triggered mine, “We have to break up.”

I wish I never said it. I wish I gave you those few days, but we both know those few days would’ve turned into weeks and months and we would’ve ended up here anyway. I wish you didn’t let me say them. I wish you kissed me to shut me up and told me I was being stupid. I wish I didn’t watch you go down that elevator, tears on your cheeks. I wish I didn’t spend the other four days in an empty king sized bed, crying for you.

I realize now that you changed. I did too. Instead of wishing for the old you, I should’ve learned to love the new you. I think I would’ve, if I had given it a chance. Actually, I know I would’ve. I think I’d fall in love with every version of you that could ever exist or has ever existed. You and I, we’re meant to be together.

I know you probably don’t believe in it, but I like to think that we’re twin flames; we’re two halves of one soul that somehow ended up in two bodies and constantly pull to find each other again. I’ve read a lot about them recently. Twin flames don’t necessarily end up together. They can even just be two people with an intense friendship. They’re people who help each other grow, even if that means they’re only in your life for a short time. I like to think that we are that case, and that in some parallel universe I’m with you and we have our daughter and we’re happy. I just wish that I was in that universe now.

I know it’s for the best that we went to the damn Crystal Cove and broke up. I’m sure someday in the future I’ll be pleased with that decision, but for now, I still regret it.”

Spencer stared at the notepad, eyes flicking between that in his left hand and the ring box in his right. He took the ring out and admired it in the light. It glinted and glimmered, delicately refracting light onto the cabinets. He slid it halfway down his ring finger because that’s as far as it would go. He imagined it was on your slender, perfectly manicured hand instead of his, but an ache formed where his heart was when he realized it’d never end up here.

Spencer grabbed the notebook. It was unlined and the paper felt flimsy and thin. He got up from the floor to find a pencil in the drawer the ring had been hidden in, and took it out to scrawl his own letter to go with his own memento. A sixteenth letter for a sixteenth item you had no idea even existed.

“Y/N,

I’d like to consider this letter sixteen, to go with the engagement ring that’s in my palm. I bought this ring the day after we ate dinner at Rossi’s and showed everyone tiny FBI onesies. I have your perfect ring here in my hand, a plain silver band with a lab-grown diamond in a four-prong setting in the center, just like you told Garcia you wanted. I should’ve given it to you the day I bought it, but I waited until the perfect opportunity presented itself.

What you didn’t know about the trip to the Crystal Cove was that I was going to propose to you there. I was going to get down on one knee in the sand at sunset after dinner. I even had a whole speech planned. I was going to tell you that I never thought I could love anyone as much as I love you, or that anyone would ever love me the way that you do. I was going to say that it amazes me how everyday, I wake up and love you more than I did the night before. And everyday I think it’s be impossible to love you and our daughter more than I do right now. I wanted to tell you that I want to wake up every morning and feel that for the rest of my life. I want the good, the bad, the ugly, I want it all. I want Korean film festivals and IHOP breakfasts and to talk to the moon. I want tubs of ice cream and overly sentimental flowers hanging from the wall. Most of all I wanted to say that I want to spend every day of my life making you happy.

That speech still applies today. I still love you enough to ask you, but I don’t think you love me enough to say yes.

It’s okay. It really is. I haven’t decided what to do yet, but if you do read this, just know that it’s okay. I promise you, it’s okay. I’m not the bitter, angry man I was at the Crystal Cove anymore. I changed again, and I hope you’re right. I hope we are twin flames and your soul will come looking for mine, and I hope it happens in this universe, not the infinite parallels that may or may not exist. I miss you and I want nothing more than for you to come back. Come home, Love, please come home.

-SR”

He stared at the notebook page, before tearing it off and folding it in half, placing it in his pocket for safekeeping. He went on his computer and bought the cheapest one-way ticket to Seattle that he could find. He needed to see you. He needed you to see this letter, see this ring. He needed to make this right.

The flight was a red eye, leaving at midnight, so he’d get to the Seattle field office by eight. He looked at the leather watch and saw that it was nearly nine. He decided had to finish, and he had to finish now, as he grabbed letter #14.

PART 14

------------

Taglist!

@l0ve-0f-my-life @aperrywilliams @helloniallslovelies @random-ravings @ajwantsapancake @andiebeaword @boiled-onionrings @frnks-stuff @icantevenanymore1 @mellifluouswildbluebells @rottenearly @sammypotato67 @blushingwueen @peaxhyjaes @justanotherfangurlz @juniorgman187 @mbowles23-blog @blameitonthenight21 @goldentournesol @rainsong01 @thelifeofadumbbitch @swimmingtrashwobblersludge @youre-a-wallflower-charlie @eldahae

#spencer reid x reader #spencer reid #spencer reid smut #spencer reid angst #spencer x you #spencer reid x you #spencer reid fic #criminal minds #criminal minds fic #cm #matthew gray gubler #mgg #dr spencer reid

171 notes · View notes

talkfastromance4 · 4 years

Text

Sunny days--Luke&Lily oneshot

Copyright talkfastromance4 © All works is intellectual property of the author. All rights reserved. Any redistribution or reproduction or any part or all contents in any form is prohibited. You may not, without written expression and consent from the author, distribute works amongst other social media platforms

a/n: just some fluff with Luke and his lil flowers

donate to my ko-fi here :)

Word count: 1.3k

Masterlist

Luke & Lily Masterlist

Enjoy! :)

• • • •

Luke had been promising you and the girls a day at the beach and while he was in his small studio playing around with his guitar and ukulele, Lily and Posy became restless. You had to constantly remind them that while dada’s door is closed they can’t go inside unless he says so. His soft voice croons beneath the doorway while Lily and Posy are playing silently outside of it.

“Girls, come away from the door,” you remind them sternly.

“But he’s taking forever!” Lily pouts rising from her cross-legged position. Posy mimics her sister, a little more wobbly standing up as she’s still getting the hang of walking after turning one last month.

“I know, sweetheart,” you brush your fingers against her forehead then cup her cheek. “But what does dada do in there?”

“Work,” she responds sullenly.

“He’ll play with you when he’s finished up, okay? Why don’t you go see what Piggy’s doing?”

Lily sighs, small shoulders slumping forward and grabs Posy’s hand. Posy beams up at you, stomping her feet on the floor as her big sister leads her to their playroom. Making sure they’re playing--some musical toys turn on--you open Luke’s studio door quietly and sneak inside.

Luke transitions his singing to a melodic hum as he continues to strum his guitar, he gives you a smile when you enter.

“Hi lovie, are the girls down for a nap? Gonna give me some inspiration?” he smirks, eyes motioning to the couch. Your cheeks warm at the memory of breaking in said couch.

“No, the girls are missing you a little extra,” you give him a look, “you’ve been working all day and they really want to go to the beach.”

Luke stops playing then sets his guitar on the floor holding his hands out for you. You take them and let out a soft squeal as he pulls you onto his lap.

“I’m sorry, I’ve had this tune in my head I’ve been trying to figure out. Tomorrow, we’ll go to the beach,” he promises with a kiss to your shoulder.

“You better--”

You’re caught off by quiet giggling on the other side of the door. You and Luke both turn and see two pairs of little fingers wiggling underneath the door. Lily and Posy are begging to come in, their fingers moving under the crack.

“You girls can come in!” Luke calls with a laugh.

Lily opens the door and your two girls charge the couch and climb up next to you and Luke.

“Are you done, dada?” Lily asks curling into the circle of his arm. Posy is on his other side playing with his yellow shirt.

“Yeah I am, sorry I was working so long my sweet,” he apologizes by kissing the top of her head. “What do you say about us all going to the beach tomorrow?”

****

You and Luke were awoken by Lily and Posy climbing on top of you. After some morning cuddles, the four of you meandered down to the kitchen for breakfast. Luke gave you a kiss before lifting both girls in his arms to get them changed while you packed a cooler of snacks and other treats.

Luke and Lily are singing together upstairs and you can’t help but smile at how sweet their voices are together. Posy tries to sing along as well but her sounds are more of an excited scream.

When you’re all packed and head upstairs to get changed, Luke and the girls are in matching yellow outfits, a little yellow clip is in Posy’s hair to keep her curls from her eyes.

“We’re ready mama!” Lily exclaims running to you, her eyes sparkling.

“I see that! I need to go get dressed first. Should I wear something yellow, too?”

“Yes!”

Once you’re all settled and everything is in the car, Luke turns on The Greatest Showman playlist, it’s currently Lily’s favorite movie. She’s singing along to ‘A Million Dreams’ with Posy who is kicking her legs in her seat. Luke grabs your hand smiling at you while your two girls continue to sing.

You lay out a large blanket in the sand with an umbrella that Luke needs to wiggle into the sand. You brought books and toys for Lily and Posy to stay occupied.

“Go!” Posy points to the ocean waves.

“We’ll go in soon, honey,” you tell her and pull out the sunscreen.

Luke applies it to Lily while you apply it to Posy, making sure to get her cheeks and tops of her ears. You place her hat on top of her head then give her a set of toy keys to play with while you remove your shorts and tank top. Luke lets out a low whistle and you roll your eyes at him, but the butterflies in your tummy don’t go ignored. You both help each other rub the lotion onto your skin. Luke makes sure to kiss your neck.

“Ready girls?” Luke asks and Posy lifts her arms up to him. He lifts her easily into his arms and Lily grabs hold of your hand.

It’s an unspoken agreement to not wade too far in the water, Luke sits on the edge of the sand and has Posy stand in between his legs. Lily is splashing with you and Posy watches with an intensity in her eyes.

“Go!” she points to you and Lily trying to walk away from Luke.

“No, no, bug, you stay here with daddy,” Luke places his hand on her chest and belly keeping her from going further into the water.

“We can go a little deeper, Pose is adventurous,” you smile at your baby girl who still has a look of determination on her little face.

“Yeah! Come on dada!” Lily waves her hand then moves a little deeper. Posy struggles some more wanting to join her sister and mama in the water.

Luke sighs in defeat, in a houseful of women he will always be outnumbered. He stands up with Posy in his arms again and goes deeper with you and Lily who is holding onto your hand tightly. She’s starting to become a bit more brave herself, but she’s still your shy girl and that won’t ever change.

Posy kicks her feet in the water that stops a little below Luke’s waist, she stretches forward and Luke braces her so she can splash her hands in the water. She squeals in happiness at the coolness of it.

“We’ve got a little fish, babe,” Luke chuckles, Posy’s arms and legs flailing. The water splashes on his face but he’s adamant on keeping his baby safe in his hold.

After ten more minutes of being in the water, you all head back to the blanket for a snack and to sit in the shade. It wasn’t too hot out but you don’t want your girls to get sunburnt. The rest of the morning and early afternoon is spent lounging on the blanket with Luke and Posy venturing to the water multiple times. He holds her hands as she stomps in the sand, he lifts her up occasionally to jump over the waves and she’s having a great time.

Meanwhile, you and Lily are reading books, well, she’s pretending to read the stories to you. She’s creating them in her head but moves her fingers over the words on the pages. It’s a wonderful day at the beach until the wind picks up a little and you smell rain. Luke helps you pack up and you finish unpacking at home just as the rain starts.

“Fro’! Fro’!” Posy shouts from Luke’s arms after he changed the girls from their beach clothes into their comfy clothes. Lily had bunny in her hands while Posy had her little elephant.

“You want to watch Frozen, love bug?” Luke asks, already turning on Disney+ to select the movie.

You join them on the couch and just as Hans and Anna finish singing ‘Love is an Open Door’ both Lily and Posy are fast asleep curled up under their blankets. Your eyes start to drift shut when Luke’s fingers start to play in your hair. Luke sneaks a photo of all his girls, even Petunia shows up off to the corner and he’s never been happier. The song that’s been jumbled in his head finally makes sense.

• • • •

Taglist: @galcalirwin @cashtonasff5sos @thecurlsofgod @myloverboyash @rotten-kandy @tea4sykes @jannimoeller3 @loveroflrh @iovehemmings @cxddlyash @princesslrh @here-for-the-uproars @katiaw2 @g-l-pierce @fairyintheglass @gosh-im-short @banditocth @dezzym17 @koalacal @lukeisbaby @spicycal @mysticalhood @notinthesameguey @wastedheartcth @atlcalm @itjustkindahappenedreally @calumance @babylon-corgis @thew0rldneedsmcreycghurt @lanternlover2 @istaywithmyjonas @calteahood @sarcastically-defensive17 @another-lonely-heart @devilatmydoor @frontmanash @philthepegacorn @mantlereid @lukedorkyhemmings @addietagglikesbands @kikixfandoms @sanrioluke @mayve-hems @morguelth @haikucal @thatscooibaby @meghanrose05 @idontneedanyone @dinosaursandsocks @cassie-sos @suchalonelysunflower @burstintocolor @zhangyixingxing1 @dead-and-golden @mymindwide @everyscarisahealingplace @stardust-galaxies @blackbutterfliescal @redrattlers @lovelybonesetc @karajaynetoday

Luke and Lily taglist: @harrysfavslut

#luke hemmings fluff #luke & lily #luke & lily fluff #luke fluff #dad!luk #dad!sos #luke 5sos writing #luke hemmings writing #luke hemmings oneshot #luke oneshot

129 notes · View notes

harrysweasleys · 3 years

Text

a lil 2021 love

now that the entire world has entered 2021, i want to wish you all a very, very happy new year!! i don’t think i need to express how shitty 2020 was as a whole, so i won’t be going into detail. but, i do have to count my blessings.

this year brought me to tumblr, and in doing that, brought me close to a group of people i never expected to meet. people that i am utterly thrilled to call my friends, and people who have been there for me through thick and thin. i know y’all are probably sick of long posts, but here we go again!

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO EVERYONE!!!! 🥰✨

—🤍

✨ @ickle-ronniekins erica. i honestly can’t even begin to express what our friendship, and what you, mean to me. you were one of the first weasley twin blogs that i found back in march/april ish and i honestly have been so inspired by your work ever since. whether it be who you are as a person, or the way that you write, i’m constantly learning from you and i couldn’t ask for more in a friendship. we’ve learnt so much about each other (like how we both cry at everything and love reading sappy books) and it’s been truly an honour getting to know you. your messages never fail to crack me up and i’m so glad our friendship has extended its boundaries so we can continue to blossom as two dorks. 🤍

✨ @theweasleysredhair oh, my goodness. chloe. where do i even start. firstly, thank you for being such an amazing person. you radiate such positive vibes and i’m eternally grateful for your sunshine presence. you crack me up to no ends (“he was right up my arse in the foeh” is a personal fave) and i cherish every conversation we share. i have adored being an fbi bitch with you and fighting crime like the badass bitches that we are. never a dull moment with you, my friend. love u so very very very much & can’t wait to continue being geeks together.

✨ @wand3ringr0s3 haaaaaaley. my dude. my gamer. you are just an incredible soul. whether it be your fic ideas, or the way that you always have an answer for something, you really are a complete joy of a human being and i have adored getting to know you over the course of these last 10 months (omg??? 10months???) you’re never short on pictures and press panels, and you’ve always got the deets. plus, your writing is absolutely impeccable and i can’t begin to express how much i absolutely adore your fics. plus, your disney series just tugs at my heart bc i love that idea so much. love you so much, my friend, and can’t wait to make more memories in 2021!

✨ @diary-of-an-onliner theaaaaa. my wife. my bb. i just really love you. i never know what you’re going to say, or send (like some very cursed pics) but i honestly adore every single interaction we’ve shared. you’re an amazing person and an equally amazing friend. your positivity is insane and the way your support just flows out — we all just really adore you. i have also enjoyed being in the fbi force with you (for legal reasons, that’s a yoke🍳) and laughing at the smallest things together. please keep being you because i have never met anyone like you and i treasure you more than you know.

✨@harrypotter-and-the-onering YOU. you are just. you are amazing. a ray of sunshine. a positive little beam of energy and i love it. i also love all of your dog pics that you send. but more seriously, i love you. you are an incredible friend. like, you’re the dream friend everyone wants. and after your message that made me cry this morning, i mean that more than ever. you’re always bringing positivity and adore hearing your life stories. you’re so fascinating and i’m glad that we get to ring in the new year as friends! you mean so much to me (you and your thorin posters) and i’m beyond blessed that i get to call you a close friend.

✨@theweirdsideofstuff martyyyyynnnaaaaa you are just a wonderful soul. you always send the sweetest things and i love how we can always talk about anything and everything. plus, you have the cutest cats and i love your taste in tv shows (finally someone i know who watches money heist lmaoooo) so just keep being you and i promise, we’ll all continue to love you. wishing you the best in 2021!

✨@pit-and-the-pen ok, firstly. you’re one of the most talented people i know. your singing? perfection. plus, i just adore how you’re always there for people. i cherish all of our chats, and will continue to cherish the chats to come. plus, you’ve also got the coolest hair. you’re just so cool. if i were to think of one person who fits the word “dope” it would be you. love u so very very much and i can’t wait to continue being friends!

✨@thoseofgreatambition leeann!!! i just love you. you are just a fun, bubbly presence and i adore your spirit. you’re impossibly sweet and loving and i love all the stories you share. except last night. i didn’t enjoy our peppa convo. that will haunt me for the rest of my life. but im sending you oodles of love and am thrilled to know that we’ll continue to chat and dork out together into the next year!!

✨@elf-punk AHHH okay, firstly, you little genius you — this year you gave us all the greatest gift by bringing us together. when you created this group, i never expected to ever be where we are now. from our thirsting, to our conversations about spn, i’m so glad to have found a friend like you. you’re so intelligent and fun and i adore you in every sense of the word. love u so much.

✨@thatfuckingliardavidtennant ahhhh you beautiful, beautiful person, you. firstly, i’m jealous of everything about you, really. from how gorgeous you are inside and out, to the fact that you’ve met pretty much all of my celeb crushes. you never fail to bring a smile to my face (again, except last night when you brought forth the most cursed knowledge known to mankind) and i love your energy so much. so here’s to 2021 where i hope we can continue to be close friends!!!!

and to a few others. my thumbs are getting sore from typing this so i’m going to try my best and remember (as well as cherish) all of you who have been there through this crappy year and brought a smile to my face. love you all more than words can say and hope that we can create more whack ass memories in the next year! 🥰🤍

✨@vogueweasley @starlightweasley @feetoffthetablee @valwritesx @breadqueen95 @darthwheezely @whiz-bangs78 @gcdric @loony-loopy-lupinn @lumosandnoxwriting @slytherinsunrise @cappsikle @thisismynerdyself AND LOADS OF OTHERS THAT IM FORGETTING IM SORRY ILY ALL

and of course, to a few people who i don’t interact with much but have always been a wonderful presence:

✨@deanfanatic @kpopgirlbtssvt @thisismysketchbook @pigwidgexn @phuvioqhile you guys are so, so supportive and lovely and i cherish all of you to no ends. your comments and replies/likes make my day! love you all and hope you all stay safe and happy. 🤍

#just me bein sappy again #Alexa talks

31 notes · View notes

mulletcal · 4 years

Text

flowers, maybe daisies, might relieve the gloom. - an a.i blurb

a/n: i lowkey blame @sexgodashton for starting this whole mini series of boomer!ash things, but i also adore this because boomer!ash is soft as hell. and also a lil d*ddy but we don’t need to talk about that. title is from wait by sweeney todd bc i love it. alternative title was gonna be from L.G. FUAD by motion city soundtrack

word count:

warnings: ashton irwin being a thirst trapping, lemon stealing whore. i’m kidding it’s just a solo ash fic w no smut but some mild ash thirst trapping.

-----

‘ashtonirwin started a live video.’

Ashton didn’t often go live on Instagram, but this shelter in place order had left him ultimately bored - writing a song every day before noon, sure, but anything after that was a blur. Occasionally he would have interviews or live-streams with the band, but on days without that he was left alone with his thoughts, and his thoughts weren’t always the safest place to be; so talking to fans it was.

It was going well so far, simply asking fans how their quarantine was going - bringing some of them into the livestream so he could talk to some face to face. One girl in particular had caught his attention when they began to discuss hobbies she had picked up during the time she’d spent at home.

“Yeah, I’m learning to garden. I have a tomato plant that is just starting to sprout actual tomatoes, so that’s kind of exciting,” She had said, a nervous laugh escaping.

“Well, I would hope that your tomato plant is sprouting tomatoes, it would be a little concerning if it was growing something else,” Ashton replied with a chuckle, the girl giving a small shrug but still laughing along with him.

“You should look into it if you’ve got the room at your house, I bet it would feel rather rewarding to be able to cook something with your own fresh vegetables.”

“Would save me quite a bit of money too. Can I grow yeast? I’d like to learn how to make my own bread but here in L.A. you can’t find yeast anywhere.”

The conversation continued like that for a few minutes more, Ashton taking only a couple more fans into the livestream after that to talk to before he decided he should probably do something else productive with his day. Something like learning to garden.

It surprised Ashton the things you were able to order online during this time - soil being the main thing. He also read that saving coffee grounds would help, and he was excited at the idea of his insane coffee habit wouldn’t be completely useless. He ended up buying seeds for tomatoes, mint, sunflowers, lemongrass, and zucchini. The lemongrass and mint was specifically for Calum, realizing he would be able to dry the plants out once he had harvested them so he could make the man his very own tea.

When his package finally arrived, Ashton spread the packages out, sliding them across the table as though he was some card dealer in Las Vegas. Thinking the fans would find it amusing, he took a picture of the spread and added it to his story with the caption of ‘pick a card, any card…’. Maybe it would only be funny to him, but it did prompt a fire reaction from Michael.

It seemed as though the reaction from fans were positive though, them taking to Twitter to let him know their excitement about his new endeavour. That’s where his weekly livestreams began. He would show everyone the progress he was making with his plants, and just in general him chatting with fans. Ashton never really thought of how refreshing it could be to just talk to the fans, without the worry of time restrictions or anyone’s personal safety in the way; in fact, it left him rather inspired, loving their fans even more if it were at all possible.

A particularly warm day in L.A. left Ashton wondering if he should go out to the garden that day - but it was the day he would normally livestream, and he was excited to show what he was up to that day. Ashton wanted to plant another tomato plant, and also the lemons on his infamous tree had enough for him to make some lemonade so he was going to go through that as well.

Clad in some cut off jeans, or as Calum so affectionately called them his jorts, and a white tank top, he pulled up the live option on Instagram and waited for the people to begin to filter in before he started to speak.

“Hey guys! Just gonna wait for more of you to filter in before I actually head outside, but I thought that since you guys love my lemon tree so much, I’d make some lemonade. Fuck, I sound like a YouTuber. Is that gonna be my next career, is just YouTube tutorials on how to make shitty lemonade?” Ashton laughed to himself, slicing the lemon so he could juice it, ignoring the comments he saw about murdering his lemon children.

It didn’t take him long to make the lemonade, making mild conversation with the fans while he stirred in a little bit of sugar and some cheat mint he had ordered while waiting for his own to grow.

“Alright, now that I’m waiting for that to cool, probably best we go outside and check on those tomatoes, hm?”

It had been weird at first, talking to himself; but he quickly realized that he talked to himself anyways, even without the phone in front of him, so it couldn’t have been too weird for anyone who could overhear him.

“So I wanted to plant another tomato plant today, because everyone can use a friend right now, you know?” He looked into the camera, a smile spreading across his face when he saw the flood of cute little emojis that followed. “M’gonna be like the Bob Ross of gardening. No mistakes, only happy accidents or whatever it was he said.”

Ashton began to work away at his garden, building up a sweat in the process. It wasn’t until he leaned back, glancing at his phone did he see a text from Michael flash across the top.

‘Mate, Crystal said stop thirst trapping the fans.’

Ashton’s brow furrowed, unsure of what the text was saying, “Okay so I just got a text from Michael - what’s thirst trapping? And am I currently doing it?”

Of all the comments that followed, he noticed one that said ‘I mean… I’m not gonna say either way but take a look at yourself and get back to us’. Another one told him that it was when someone wears something in order to provoke risque texts, or gain attention from someone.

Ashton pouted, looking down at his appearance. He was kind of sweaty, but he didn’t think that the fans would mind him being covered in dirt and sweat, it’s not as though they had to smell him. Though, he would admit that he needed a shower.

“Well, since my tomato plant has been… planted next to its’ friend, and I’m apparently thirst trapping you all, I should probably go shower and clean up. Is me mentioning a shower thirst trapping as well?” Ashton rubbed his face over his hands, a small huff leaving his lips, “I don’t know… Fellow youths, tweet me and lemme know. Also, may hold a poll later on what to name these guys.” He flipped the camera around, struggling for a moment, to show the sunflowers that were starting to sprout, “M’thinking of naming one Denise. Just seems like a Denise.”

After his small speech was over, he ended the stream, grinning to himself. He hadn’t meant to show off his body in such a way, but it was funny to know that even with him hardly doing anything but be himself they still lost their shit.

Glancing around at his garden, he felt himself swell with a mild sense of pride. He was still a ways off from seeing any fruits of his labour (literally), but it made him feel good knowing he did something with his time at home, instead of slipping further into his mind which wasn’t always the kindest to him.

Ashton realized that when he was gardening, it was similar to songwriting in a way where all of his self doubts and fears went away and he could just pour himself into it - the reward being well worth the risk in the end.

Once his shower was done, he sat outside in his backyard, sipping his lemonade and enjoying the sunshine - realizing that having to stay home wasn’t all too bad, if it meant he could reset his mind, and do some small part to help how he could during that time.

tag list: @haikucal @talkfastromance4 @softbabiestan @boyfriend-cal @calum-uncrowned @wildflowerirwin @irwindoll @gosh-im-short @thesubtweeter @heavenisapeach @ridingcthood @loveroflrh @mantlereid @inlovehoodx @irwinkitten @n-ctarinenga @g-l-pierce @thecurlsofgod

#ashton irwin #ashton irwin blurb #ashton irwin fluff #ashton irwin fanfiction #5 seconds of summer fanfiction #boomer!ash

170 notes · View notes

vangoghmusings · 4 years

Text

a/n: hello! i’ve been wanting to do this for a while now since im a huge astrology nerd (so i know what im talking about teehee) so this is male match-ups according to sign and compatibility. this isn’t my usual kind of writing so i hope you guys like it!! <3 if you don’t know your sign check here

this took me so long oh my god i hope you guys like it

taglist: @mixfi @lilacskyura @katsuhoee @moonlightinsanity @anime-waifuuu @iiminibattlehero @leeeah-loooser @bby-chloe1999 @verymuchbabey @h0wab0utw3d0ntd0that@unknownweeabo @cookednoodlez @helloshoutohere @star-mum @izuku-sakura @thegalxe

UA STUDENTS

Katsuki Bakugou- April 20; Taurus

the absolute SHOCK in my face to learn he wasn’t an aries

it would be expected that katsuki is a fire sign, like cmon look at his quirk

but taurus is actually an earth sign

taurus are typically seen as quite calm, but,,

katsuki does seem like a true taurus in many ways

they can be stubborn and unwilling to compromise

they are very realistic

HATE FEELING INSECURE

they are often great at cooking and love to shop

i feel like katsuki isn’t a self indulgent shopper but would buy anything for his s/o

taurus are really good at working with their hands ;)

theyre soft romantic bbs and as much as katsuki hates being vulnerable he’d definetly be a softie with his s/o

id match katsuki with a calm pisces

Izuku Midoria- July 15; Cancer

i am not shocked at ALL to see that the lil broccoli boy is a cancer

like cmon he’s so sensitive

he is a cancer to the T

he’s loyal, emotional, imaginative

he also carries the negative traits of many cancers

such as feeling insecure and having difficulty taking criticism

i mean the kid breaks his bones to prove others wrong

cancers love being with their friends and family

and they love helping others

the career of a hero would be natural for cancers

cancers are such sweet babies and izuku fits right into that category

i would match izuku with a chill taurus

Tenya Iida- August 22; Leo

i didn’t expect tenya to be a leo but im also not surprised

leos are often seen as flashy and arrogant

but they’re more than their stereotype

leos are passionate and natural born leaders

like cmon class rep!

tenya being a leo makes a lot of sense

he’s generous and kind and always strives for the best

they tend to be a bit dramatic, and tenya can be too

being that leos are a fire sign they gravitate to self growth

this can be seen in tenya wanting to improve and challenging himself

leos struggle facing harsh realities, similarly to tenya when he learned about what happened to tensei

leos are known for their bravery and tenya fits right in

i would match tenya with a kind aquarius

Shoto Todoroki- January 11; Capricorn

i practically screamed when i realized shoto was a capricorn

it just makes way too much sense

they’re responsible, well-mannered, respectful !!!!

HOW IS HE SO HOT AND RESPECTFUL

capricorns i just,, i love them, truly

shoto is no exception

they love family, things of quality, traditions

and their dislikes vary from day to day

why?

cause they’re iconic thats why

however, capricorns aren’t always the nicest

they tend to be condescending and can often come off as rude

they’re incredibly unforgiving *ahem endeavor ahem*

but, its because they just have naturally high standards

it makes sense that he is an earth sign because he’s super grounded

because saturn rules capricorn, the tend to seem cold and distant at times

but they are incredibly loyal friends and always strive for the best

i would match shoto with a down to earth cancer

Mashiro Ojiro- May 28; Gemini

i must admit, i was surprised to learn ojiro is a gemini

but if you really look at his character it makes a lot of sense

gemini’s have a bad rep of being too faced

they’re actually one of my favorite signs!!

gemini’s are are gentle and affectionate

and sweet bb ojiro is exactly that

however they also tend to be quite anxious, another thing ojiro happens to be at times as well

they’re very adaptable people

this can be seen throughout ojiro’s training and how much he learns and is willing to continue striving for

gemini’s are very sociable and will talk to almost anyone

like, he doesn’t see hagakure but they’re still good friends

this is why i think ojiro would do great with a fire sign

i would match ojiro with a cheerful sagittarius

Denki Kaminari- June 29; Cancer

alright cancer number two!!

to be honest, denki doesn’t really give cancer vibes

but, his personality traits align to much of what a cancer is

tenacious and loyal

and denki is definitely that

however, cancers can be suspicious of others and their actions

and denki feels like the kind of guy to snoop on somebody

but we gotta give denki some credit

cancers strive to be there for their friends no matter what

denki shows this in the usj attack when he protects momo and jiro

cancers tend to avoid conflict but even so, they search for conflict in those who pose bigger threats to them

similarly to when denki makes fun of bakugou even though he could totally blow him up

denki is a chatty and flirty baby

and cancers tend to be most compatible with earth signs

buuut i think denki would be better suited with a fire sign

i’d match denki with an outgoing aries

Hanta Sero- July 28; Leo

at first i was like hmmm no

but then i used my brain and i was like actually yes

leos are prideful and while sero doesn’t seem like the boastful kind, he does have a lot of pride in himself

leos are very committed to their goals and sero’s actions show his dedication to becoming a hero

leos are also so funny?? and sero is literally one of the funniest guys of 1A

sero is one of the most sociable in the class and a total class clown

leos are almost always seen with their friends and sero is no different

sero’s vibes are just immaculate in my opinions

so his s/o needs to match the energy

i would match sero with a funny gemini

Eijiro Kirishima- October 16; Libra

GOD IT JUST MAKES SO MUCH SENSE

I CANT EVEN EXPRESS

THE ACCURACY

ok ok but seriously, of course kiri is a libra

libras are diplomatic, fair, and strive for justice

aka being MANLY is in the stars for bb kiri

however, libras aren’t the most confident people

they’re quite insecure and pity themselves a’lot

which makes sense that its canon that it took kiri so long to accept his quirk

have you ever wondered why kiri is so hot and cute and perfect?

ITS BECAUSE HES A LIBRA

im not even kidding

libras are known for being physically attractive

i mean libra is literally ruled by venus

who else is venus?

APHRODITE AKA THE GODDESS OF LOVE

long story short, kiri is the god of love

libras hate being alone

why do you think he puts up with bakugou constantly calling him shitty hair and pushing him around?

i considered putting kiri with a water sign but they’re kinda babies (no offense i love my water signs)

but i don’t think he could handle a person who is constantly emotional like many water signs are

i would match kiri with a kind-hearted sagittarius

Hitoshi Shinso- July 1; Cancer

jesus christ ANOTHER CANCER??

i cant even be upset cause it makes sense

while i would’ve thought shinso was a calm scorpio or a relaxde picses

he fits much better as a cancer

as mentioned previously with deku and denki, cancers really do have a heart of gold and just want to help people

cancers are also very manipulative people

i mean, look at this mans quirk

cancers are also moody and pessimistic

characteristics that shinsou has but are seen more as stoic and quiet

but cancers are also sympathetic

and bb shinsou is a softie i just know it

cancers are guided by emotion

like deku, he is seen as passionate for his desire to be a hero, even though his quirk is seen to be one of evil

shinsou needs to be with someone who’s willing to listen when he opens up (which cancers hate doing)

i would match shinsou with an understanding taurus

Tamaki Amajiki- March 1; Aries

HUH

HUUUUH???

youre telling me this man is an aries and bakugou isnt??

i need to collect my thoughts

OK so tamaki is an aries

and honestly its pretty accurate

most times aries are seen as passionate in a reckless and angry manner

but tamaki’s passion is displayed in his dedication to being a hero

i mean he’s literally in the big 3

aries tend to be moody, which is seen in tamaki’s shy actions

but they’re also enthusiastic and courageous

tamaki’s courage is shown in the mission to rescue eri

aries are seen as intimidating and tamaki’s dark features are exactly that

and while he is very shy, he needs someone to help bring him out of his shell delicately

id match tamaki with a gentle libra

Mirio Togata- July 15; Cancer

whats up with mirio and deku sharing the same bday doe

this is way too many cancers

BUT mirio is such a cancer lets be real

we’ve covered the basics of cancers

sensitive

loyal

will do anything for others

and most importantly brave

the sign of a cancer is a crab

the crab symbolizes someone who doesn’t realize their great strength

mirio is the personification of the strength of the crab

and poor baby has gone through so much and deserves the world

he’s so cheerful but he needs someone to be there for him when he’s at his most emotional moments

i would match mirio with a tender capricorn

PRO-HEROES

Shota Aizawa- November 8; Scorpio

i mean cmon

ofc dadzawa is a scorpio

he’s the image of a stereotypical scorpio

dark features, dark clothing, serious and kinda rude

but scorpios get a bad rep for being meanies (we should be watching out for virgos tho) (jk jk i love my virgos <3)

but scorpios have some of the best characteristics

their loyalty is beyond words

they would literally lay down their life for a friend or the good of others

scorpios are passionate and assertive, and this side of aizawa definitely comes out

aizawa is so stoic he needs somebody to soften him up

i would match aizawa with a cheery cancer

Hizashi Yamada- July 7; Cancer

another f*cking cancer

AND IT MAKES SENSE

not just because aizawa and him are married and he’s a cancer and it totally makes sense

but hizashi is such a cancer oh my god

he’s sensitive, and caring, and brave, and a literal pro hero

which is a cancer living the dream

cancers often have difficult childhoods and struggle immensely to find outlets

this fits with the theory that as a child, hizashi was put up for adoption and/or muzzled as a child because of his powerful quirk

cancers are ruled by the moon, which would make sense to why they are so emotional

because the moon goes through phases, so do they

hizashi needs someone that would help him be strong outside of his hero work and for his own mentality

i would match hizashi with (aizawa or) a charismatic virgo

Toshinori Yagi- June 10; Gemini

ofc all might is a gemini

he literally has 2 forms

and geminis are literally two faced

it makes so much sense that the symbol of peace is a gemini

he’s adaptable and a quick learner

geminis are affectionate and you cant tell me toshi isn’t the biggest cuddler and softie in the world

geminis are people pleasers and just want to make others happy

and all might’s literal thing is smiling to comfort those in fear

toshi needs someone who is understanding of what he had gone through as a retired hero and the bearer of one for all

i would match toshi with an inquisitive aquarius

Keigo Takami- December 28; Capricorn

DADDY

ok but he is such a capricorn its not even funny

he’s a cocky know-it-all kind of capricorn

but he’s also a responsible and well mannered capricorn

capricorns are people who are willing to take on immense responsibilities

and hawks is literally the no. 2 hero so of course he’s got a lot of responsibilities

because he’s an earth sign, we wants to get the most out of what the world has to offer him

including fame and money

but hawk’s head strong and professional attitude is what comforts people and makes him such a great hero

he needs someone who would match his energy well

i would match keigo with a level-headed scorpio

VILLAINS

Dabi- January 18; Aquarius

FINALLY AN AQUARIUS

i have a deep love for this sign

dabi is an aquarius and it is so accurate

aquarius love to fight for a cause

in dabi’s eyes, the league of villains is the best cause he can support

and he’s at the front lines

they’re considered humanitarians,,and dabi is in his own “special way”

aquarius love a good conspiracy and mystery

and dabi is a total mystery

aquarius constantly have to be stimulated and doing something

otherwise their boredom can lead to reckless actions

they are also anti all emotions

this is why they seem so aloof, they don’t know how to confront their own feelings

i’d pair dabi up with someone who is willing to listen to him and hopefully allow him to open up

i would match dabi with a charming sagittarius

Tomura Shigaraki- April 4; Aries

now this is a stereotypical aries

aries is ruled by mars, which was named after aries

AKA THE GOD OF WAR??

like his literal goal is to destroy society,,

aries love to be in leadership roles

they’re also short-tempered

impulsive

and aggressive

how ever, his more “positive” traits such as determination and passion are also evident in his characteristics

they’re competitive people and tomura definitely is one

tomura would need to be with someone who is calm

i would match tomura with a patient leo

Kai Chisaki- Birthdate Unknown;NA

so kai’s sign is unknown

BUT

he still deserves a match up

besides his stance in villainy

kai as actually very well mannered and polite

but he doesn’t value human life and sees his as more important and pure than those who are “sick”

a lot of his characteristics would lead me to believe he is an unevolved sociopathic capricorn

outside of being a villain i would match kai with someone who was understanding and a good listener

i would match kai with a sympathetic pisces

65 notes · View notes

animmania · 5 years

Text

HOMESTUCK EPILOGUE MEAT THOUGHTS **SPOILERS**

So i want to make some things clear before i get started. I have only read the meat option. I wanted

to also read candy so I could make this with all possible information. But meat left such a bad taste

in my mouth. And after a friend of mine told me somethings about candy i just couldnt bring my

self to read more of it.

So yes i did not like the epilogue. And this is mainly just going to be talking about some of the main

reasons why i didnt like it. And if you did like it or disagree with anything i say. Thats perfectly fine

In fact im honestly happy you could like it. I really really wanted to like it but i just. Couldnt.

So what about it gave me so much issues. The first one is the style and format and feel of it. You will

notice its very different looking from homestuck. Being all text and having 2 routes to choose from.

And alot of it feels very differnt then homestuck and to be fair. Thats the point. I had to have it

explianed to me but it seems to be mostly going for the style and taking common tropes in fan

fiction. The look of it is apprently based on a fan fiction site and the meat route is meant to be the

darker fan fiction while the candy is meant to be happier one where every ship comes true. (altho

from what ive heard it seems more depressing then the darker route so i dont get how that works but

oh well) but that is the point. So it would and should make sense that it dosnt feel like homestuck

right? Well. no. Because no matter what. This is still the offical epilogue to the story. You can make

it look unoffical as much you want. You can try to explain that its both in cannon but not in cannon

but at the end of the day it dosnt matter. Its still the epilogue. It was written in part by the actual

creator. Its on the offical site. In fact if you go on the site right now. Its the very first thing you see.

With right below it homestuck. If they really wanted to drive this fan fiction thing all the way

though. Then i think it both shouldnt have been on the offical site. And hussie shouldnt have

written it. They could have made its own lil site or heck maybe even put it up on the fanfiction site

they had been mimicking. But by putting it up on the offical site it defeats the idea that this is meant

to be fanfiction.

While im on the looks of the epilogue i also got to say i was really expecting it to do more with it.

I was expecting them to do some really intersesting things with it being in this new format. For

example something many people thought including my self was that once john went back into the

cannon the formating would change back into homestucks as it normally is. That would have been

really intersting and would have helped cement that that world being not in the cannon. But. no.

That never happens. It stays in the fan fiction form though out and thats just kinda it. It felt like a

waste. Even the meta narrtive i thought was really wasted. When dirk takes over its noting that

homestuck its self hasnt done in the past. If anything its less. Like remember when doc scratch

took over in homestuck. And the whole site it self changed. That was really cool and interesting.

But here....its just changes the black text to yellow. Thats it. And now the narration is coming from

him. I couldnt help but feel really let down by it. It just seemed like....such a waste.

Ok lets talk about the characters and story and my main issues with them. Now apprently alot of

people didnt like that it was getting much darker in areas but i didnt mind. Homestuck was never

one to shy away from dark or mature subjects and now that the characters are older them dealing

with more mature things makes sense. My issue with the story is actually that its trying to be a story

when its meant to be an epilogue. An epilogue. To me at least. Should be about just the characters.

Seeing how they are doing after the events of the main story and seeing maybe new struggles after

the credits. And while there is some of that here. Its not the focus and more of the focus is one this

new story starting. John having to go fight lord english. Dirk becoming evil. Jane wanting to

become president. I couldnt get into any of it and it never gave me a reason to. This is just an

epilogue.not homestuck 2. not a spin off of any sort. Its just meant to be a short thing on what

happened after the ending. The main story is already over. And its so fruasting becuase it had stuff

in it that i loved but they dont focus on it enough. Like theres a side thing where roxy mentions

that they and calli had been talking about gender idenity and how they had came to the conclsuion

that roxy is trans and uses he him/they them pronuons. That part. Made me so happy. I thought it

was amazing that they were doing this with their character and it was really interesting. But at the

same time i couldnt help but think how much if this had more of a focus on. Like they say calli and

roxy talked about this. And i cant help but think how much i would have loved to see that

conversation

there was also this one throw away line about how rose and her wife had been talking about

adopting. And i cant even to begin to say how much id love to read a story of just them talking

about if they should have a kid. And john discovering he has depression i thought was really good

and i wish it had more focus and had him just talking more to people about it. This epilogue left me

with just wanting so much it didnt give. Now i will give credit the roxy being trans thing didnt

just get dropped they did have it devople as time went on and it was cool but again i just wanted

more of it. The stuff with dirk and lord english just felt. Pointless. And gave me an impression that

maybe they were afraid people wouldnt be interested in the epilogue if there wasnt some kind of

stake at risk and i cant help but wonder what it would have been like if they werent in it.

My other main issue with the story is how they did sorten characters. Some i liked for example

where johnn,roxy,dave,karkat,rose and a few others.they were good and i felt they for the most part

showed how they had grown over the years and that this would be how they would naturally be

older. But others i couldnt get behind. For examples i didnt really care how they did jade. She really

didnt add anything and most of what she was doing was hitting on dave and karkat. It felt kinda like

a waste to have her just for that. Granted they do have her get possed but by then you dont really get

any more real interaction out of her so your mostly left with how she first shows up and its just ..

weak i think i would describe it as weak. Then theres characters like jane and dirk . Jane now being

just stright up a jerk letrally shamming jake to hundereds of people and dirk letrally being super

evil and doing really really fucked up things. Im not asking for characters to be perfect angels. But

this seems just to much. To go from homestuck where they had grown alot as characters and had

bettered them selfs as people. To just going to this. Its. Its very unsatisfying.

I think i would use that word to sum up meat alot. Its very . Unsatisfying. They mention in the

choice just before you pick meat or candy. That meat would be much harder to get though. But it

would be over all better for you and more satisfying to eat. For me. That never happened. Though

out it all i never get that satisying feeling. I never got that (oh ok this made it worth it) it never

never happened for me and its so fruastrating because i wanted to have that feeling so badly. I

wanted to love this but so many things about it kept making it impossible for me.

And this brings me to the final thing i want to say. Maybe my perosnal biggest issue with this and

why i cant enjoy it.

But first i want to talk about homestucks ending. To me. Homestuck ended perfectly. One could

agrue that it could have had more problems going on but to me it was what i wanted. The characters

after years of struggles. After death,pain,saddness and so many hardships. Pulled though. They

made it to the other side. They grew as people. They bettered them selfs. And got a happy ending

that they desvered and worked hard to get. And with the credits giving us insight to how it was

going over there. I couldnt help but be so happy at it. When i got to it i was very emtional and i just

felt it was so right . And a great note to end homestuck on .

But thats no longer the case. It isnt the end now. It isnt the last thing from homestuck

This is . This is the end of homestuck. This is the last note it will go out on . The epilogue. An

epilogue that. To me. Felt so unsatisfying. And put the characterss though more shit and left things

on a sad un happy note that might not get any real conlsuion. This is it. It turned an ending that

i loved. Into a bitter sweet momment. And you could say im being over dramatic. And i would

agree. I think i am. I want to just shut up and just enjoy this or ignore it. But i cant. My brain wont

shut up and let it go. That this last part of homestuck. Something i love so much. Had its final

momment be this. I just feel. So . Dissapointed by all this.

Now i want to just say some quick things here. These are just my thoughts. If you liked the epilogue

or even loved it. Im so happy for you. Honestly i mean this with all my heart. Im glad people can

and have enjoyed it. And you could also make the argument that by not reading both routes that

could be why i didnt enjoy it and maybe reading both would do so. And hey. Maybe your right. But

i cant really bring my self to do. But at the very least i got my thoughts out. And as i am wrighting

this i am already feeling so much better and im glad i could get my thoughts out there.

#homestuck #homestuck epilogue #epilogue spoilers #epilogue

4 notes · View notes

loneleesoul · 5 years

Text

Starker: Party Games Pt. 2

dang, this is turning into a lil story, im loving this and I hope you love it too.

💙💙💙

"Isn't that breaking the rules of the game?" Peter decides to be brave in his last living moments.

"I won't tell anyone." Tony whispers, walking closer to Peter.

He gives in, fear taking over. "Who are you the most afraid of here?" He sighs, not looking at Tony.

To Peter's surprise, Tony laughs. "Seriously? That's so pathetic Parker." He laughs as Peter sends a text to Aunt May to get him.

Ned would forgive him, if he survived this conversation.

"Of course, Ned is so not like that.. I got angry over nothing." Tony shrugs and Peter stares. "You aren't mad now? Aren't you always mad at pathetic poor pitiful Peter Parker?" Now Peter's mad. "You wonder why I said no to getting trapped in a room with you? For one I'm terrified of you and two, that's like accepting you beating me up..letting you beat me up by voluntarily being alone with you. But whatever, you beat me up weekly anyways."

Tony looks a bit shocked and Peter brushes past him to go get Ned. He's fuming, smoke from the ears mad.

He finds Ned talking to the girl he accidentally offended earlier and just drags him away. "We are leaving right now."

And Ned knows well enough to not anger a mad Peter, it mainly ends in frustrated tears actually.

They walk past Tony and walk to May's car. "What happened?" Is May's first words and Ned shakes his head in a warning. "Can we just go home please."

__________

Everyone seemed shocked to see Peter show up at school the next day. Except for Tony, which Peter hadn't seen and was trying to avoid. Some people even asked how he had survived Tony's wrath.

If anything, some could say that Tony was glad to come out of an angry conversation with Peter unscathed. Peter, of course, has never hit anyone or wanted to hit anyone.

Peter nearly makes it through history without Tony, when he shows up seven minutes before the bell rings.

He audibly curses when Tony walks through the door, earning himself a detention. He's glad Tony didn't hear the words "motherfucking shit nugget!!" aimed at him.

"Late Stark, detention." The teacher barks at Tony, who ignores her.

Now's a really good time to use the phrase motherfucking shit nugget.

Tony doesn't say a word or even look at him all class, which shocks Peter.

Ned even notices, and shrugs at Peter across the classroom.

Tony doesn't seem fuming angry like last night, or pissed off like when he speaks to Peter. It's like, the moment he saw him at the party last night he had changed.

Now, Peter's starting to guess what Tony really wanted to do in that room.

Beating Peter up seemed to have made the most sense, but it was a room for that.

There's no way.

There's absolutely no way.

That Tony Stark... could like Peter Parker.

__________

The moment the bell rings Peter follows Ned out, hoping he'd be some form of protection.

Wait, if Tony wasn't mad at him did Peter really need protection?

"Come on Peter, don't be late to detention.. you are already in enough trouble." Ned tries to push him away but Peter's glued to him. "No way dude, I'm waiting until Stark is already in there so he won't sit by me."

Ned rolls his eyes "He's always late though, wanna come over for dinner? My mom's making something she found off of pinterest." He gleams with pride for his mother and Peter laughs.

"Do you mean you found it and showed it to her? I've seen your pinterest Ned, nothing but Beyonce and baking videos." They stand outside the detention room.

"Very funny Peter, now go.. I don't want to be associated with a rule breaking hooligan." He pushes him through the door and walks away.

And just as Peter had hoped, Stark was already in the room. Staring of course as Peter sits far from him.

He takes a seat next to Michelle, who nods at him. "What are you in for?"

"Saying a curse word." He winces, realising how stupid it actually was. She raises her brows at him."I say fuck on the daily and never get reprimanded, what could you have possibly said to get put in here?"

"Motherfucking shit nugget." He whispers, mindful of the few people near them.

Michelle gasps in fake shock. "What a bad curse word, wanna play War?" She pulls out a deck of cards.

"Sure, I'm not that good so it'll be a short game." He admits with a shrug and Michelle looks around the room. "Hey he's pretty cool.. Stark, get over here."

Peter grabs her arm and hisses a menacing "You are the motherfucking shit nugget now."

She smiles as Tony walks over "Yeah MJ?" He pulls a chair up to her desk as she holds up the cards. "War."

"Sure, I'll kick your ass." It's as if Peter isn't here.

That's why he stays silent for the first few minutes. Unsure of what was going on in Tony's mind, he hadn't gotten a beating this week yet. He could slam his head down on the desk, shattering his nose and the teacher wouldn't even notice.

"Peter, go." Tony mutters, waiting for him to put his card down.

So he does realize Peter is here. He places down a card and a few seconds later, ends up losing even more cards to Michelle.

Peter stares anxiously at the few unturned cards in his hand, he was going to lose. "Scared Parker?" Michelle taunts and Peter scoffs. "Sometimes you gotta sacrifice your soldiers to end up winning the battle."

Tony snorts, amused but staying silent. Woah, that's a first. He usually laughs at his pain or struggles.

Peter still loses, all his cards now with Michelle, who wins overall. "Bitch, who kicked your ass? I kicked your ass! Biiiitch, who kicked your ass? I kicked your ass!" She cheers and Tony rolls his eyes. "I totally had that game, and you were totally looking at your cards the whole time." He groans defensively and Michelle tosses the cards all over her desk.

"Loser, 52 card pickup." She points at the splattered pile half on the floor half on the desk. Peter sighs, bending down to get all of the cards from the dirty floor.

"You need to up your game Parker, next time you call someone a motherfucking shit nugget you better have practiced before." She says as he puts all of the cards back in the box.

"Hey, it's technically a game of luck, what cards you get."

Ok something is seriously wrong. Peter stares in wonder, was that Tony defending him. "Is that why you lost? You got bad cards?" Michelle puts the box in her bag and slings it over her shoulder.

"Let's go to dinner, loser over here can pay.. right?" Her eyebrows are raised in a threating sort of way.

"I can't, Michelle I'll buy you dinner some other time. I'm already going over to Ned's." He's mindful of Tony's stare.

Has he always been staring at him and Peter just never noticed?

"This is why nobody likes you, I'll hold you up on that offer.. Toe-knee you are welcome to have him pay for you too." She gives a lame finger-guns snap before walking out.

It's already too uncomfortable for Peter to bear and he stands, chair squeaking awkwardly.

"Peter..." Tony's quiet and Peter pretends to not hear him and he grabs his bag. It's almost been 30 minutes and Peter sees no harm in leaving early.

Aunt May's texted him saying she's outside, and sweet freedom.

Until a hand grabs his wrist, pulling hard.

He stumbles back, legs buckling and he falls into Tony's chest. His muscular arms hold Peter tight, as Peter struggles.

This is it, Tony was holding in all of his rage for now. He was a goner.

"Peter." Tony mumbles, and it's almost like they're hugging.

"Tony please let me go... I'm so sorry for yelling at you just please don't hit me again." He begs, remembering he still had some bruises from last week.

Tony lets him go and Peter turns to face him quickly. "I'm sorry." He's so damn quiet.

"Look.. it's fine, my ride is here and I really need to go." He says, walking backwards slowly. He waits for a reply but is met with staring silence.

He turns and quickly walks out the doors.

__________

Damn it Stark, fucking pussy.

He watches Parker run out the doors and groans.

So weak, just tell the little shit already.

Last night, Peter had opened Tony's eyes. Shocked him to the very core.

He realized that he was seriously hurting him, which should've been obvious.

Besides yes, beating him up, emotionally hurting him. How could Tony not have seen it before? How shy he was, anxiety, never ate, didn't defend himself because he thought everything said of him was true.

I'm such an asshole.

Stuck in the cliché of bullying the person you like.

Peter would never ever want to be with him, it's like he said. "I'm terrified of you..."

It was like Tony had been shot, and he deserved all of the pain.

This boy would never say yes to Tony, ever... He'd think of it as a joke or ask if cameras were around.

He wishes he had his number, or any way to contact him. Spamming him would eventually work.

Maybe treating him like shit wasn't the best approach.

He needs to change.

8 notes · View notes

curly-q-reviews · 5 years

Photo

ROAD TO THE OSCAR MAYER WIENER AWARDS 2K19

The Ballad of Buster Scruggs, 2018 (dir. Joel Coen, Ethan Coen)

Nominated for: Best Original Song, Best Costume Design, Best Adapted Screenplay

SPOILER ALERT THAR BE SPOILERS AHEAD ME HEARTIES BE YE WARNED

wowee what a cool film!! i went into this not knowing much about it except it was directed by the Coen brothers (directors of Fargo and The Big Lebowski) which set real high expectations for me. these guys are real masters of storytelling and what immediately come to mind when i think of movies that know how to effectively use dark humor. i also love the kinds of stories they tell in general, how they take subjects and settings that seem kinda mundane and just give them this little extra spark.

so is this newest film just as good as their other work??? well id say yeah for sure!!! it reminds me a lot of a film they did shortly after The Big Lebowski called O Brother, Where Art Thou?, because theyre both period pieces AND because they both feature a myriad of eclectic and interesting characters. the one thing that makes The Ballad of Buster Scruggs really stand out from their other films however is the fact that this is actually an anthology made up of six different stories, all set during the same time period in The Wild West. its also worth mentioning that this movie was made to premiere on Netflix, which is something ive started to see more and more as the streaming platform becomes the new go-to source of media content. its very exciting to see such prolific directors go the Netflix route and have great success with it, because it means that the platform really is capable of creating high-quality movies and TV shows and working with big-name talent. im sure the big hollywood production companies are all quaking in their lil booties cause this means big BIG changes are on the horizon

ok so ive reviewed anthology series before, notably Black Mirror, and with those reviews i ranked the short stories in order of least to most favorite. so i guess in this case ill do the same, although its hard to really rank these cause i truly enjoyed all of them in different ways. there was one however that didnt really tickle my fancy much, which was “Near Algodones”. this one stars james franco as a bank robber who seems to have met his match in a fiery (probably crazy) bank teller. he gets caught and hung from a tree by the town’s sheriff, but nearly manages to escape death when a Native American tribe swoops in and kills the sheriff and his crew. james franco is saved by a cattle driver, only to be caught again by the next town’s sheriff for allegedly trying to hawk the cattle (which was not the case at all). right before they kick the chair out from under him at the hanging, he sees a beautiful woman in blue, who at first smiles at him but then looks unnerved as he stares back at her.

i think with this one the ending really didnt do much for me, i kinda didnt get it. i did understand the whole irony behind surviving punishment for a crime he DID commit but getting hanged for a crime he never committed, and the bank teller was pretty hilarious, but everything else about the segment was just ok. james franco didnt really blow me away (he never really does but thats besides the point), the rest of the performances were fine, and the story just kinda zipped on through. maybe ill give this one another watch to see if the ending makes any more sense to me, or if theres any sense to be made from it at all

next up for me would be “The Gal Who Got Rattled”, and this segment i have mixed feelings over. its about this brother and sister who set out on the Oregon trail so that the brother can get his sister to marry his business partner in Oregon. the sister seems like a kind of wishy-washy, subdued character who just kinda goes along with whatever her brother says without giving much of her own opinion. i gotta give credit to zoe kazan (who starred in The Big Sick) cause she does a great job with this character, totally spot-on performance. ok so turns out the brother is a fucken HORRIBLE businessman who screws up all his business deals all the time, and he tragically dies like two days into being on the oregon trail. he has this annoying-ass dog that barks all the time and everyone else on the caravan is sick of it, so when the brother dies the sister just lets one of the trail leaders put it down. turns out the sister like did not like her brother at all but was always too afraid to say anything. now getting back to the bad businessman thing, apparently he had promised the helper boy that is helping move their covered wagon a large sum of money, half of it halfway through the journey and the rest when they get to oregon. problem is, the sister doesnt have the money, so it was either left in the brothers pocket when he was buried or there wasnt actually any money at all and he lied, y’know, like a bad businessman does. the trail leader who put the annoying dog down offers to help her, and the two start to get close. so now its like a pseudo love story thing. except it ends pretty tragically (the sister dies its a long story and pretty ironic just watch it if u wanna know)

so uuuhhhhh this one was long as shit, like a lot longer than the other segments when it didnt really need to be??? like it just kept going and going, and again the ending didnt really make up for how long it was. i really liked zoe kazan in this, but otherwise nothing to write home about.

number four on my list would have to go to “All Gold Canyon”, which basically just follows the story of a gold miner in the mountains trying to get that money honey. this segment is the simplest one out of the bunch, but i gotta say its absolutely gorgeous. what beautiful scenery and cinematography. it provides a nice contrast to our disheveled, run-down gold miner who is just tearing up the beautiful grassy fields trying to get to this gold. there seems to be a theme in this one of man’s relationship to nature, and how the gold miner does put in effort to respect it but still takes advantage of it for his own benefit. and i guess theres a broader theme of greed, or the ruthless and endless pursuit of wealth which can drive people to do crazy and desperate things. i definitely really enjoyed this one, especially the gold miner character played by tom waits. but otherwise it didnt stand out as much to me as the other segments im gonna talk about

SPEAKING OF WHICH heres number three!! “The Mortal Remains” is right up my alley, and has some more mythical elements to it than the other segments ive talked about so far. so we have a wagon full of passengers all going to this hotel for various reasons, and its a really diverse cast of characters: we have the older wife of a prolific religious lecturer, a rich Frenchman, a trapper, a foppish Englishman, and a cheery laid-back Irishman, the last two seeming to be companions of some sort. they all get on the topic of the true nature of mankind, and the three characters opposite of the strange pair all have something different to say. the trapper believes that all people are inherently the same, with the same basic needs. the older woman disagrees and insists that there are two kinds of people, upright and sinning. and then the Frenchman says that both of them are wrong, that human existence is much more complicated and nuanced than that; no one persons life is exactly the same as another’s. and then we have the Englishman and the Irishman, who turn out to be bounty hunters of some sort (is heavily alluded that they are grim reaper-type figures). they explain their method of completing their kills, and talk about how they enjoy watching their victims “try to make sense of it all” in their death throes. these two clearly have a much more cold and sinister idea of the nature of mankind, and the rest become very unsettled all the way to the hotel. no one else even dares to step out of the carriage while the bounty hunters drag their latest victim through the front entrance and up the stairs.

oh man this segment was great! i think the reason its third on my list is cause i really wish there was more to it, like if the Coen brothers spent more time on this one instead of “The Gal Who Got Rattled” it would be perfect. Jonjo O’Neill and Brendan Gleeson as the bounty hunters were so enthralling, and i loved watching them play off of each other. hell, i couldve had a whole movie featuring those two. and the screenwriting really shines in this segment too. this segment almost feels like a fable or something, which is really fitting for the time period. makes me wonder if they had based it off of an actual fable. but anyway yeah this ones awesome!

i had a hard time choosing between “The Mortal Remains” and this next segment for second place cause i liked them both equally, but in the end “Meal Ticket” gets #2 purely because of the utterly fantastic performance by Harry Melling, who plays a quadriplegic actor in a traveling show run by liam neesons character, an irish traveling entertainer. the story itself is really simple, we just see this disabled actor be carted from one town to the next, doing the same stage show which is basically just him reciting famous prose throughout the ages. meanwhile liam neeson is trying to get as much money as he can out of the audience members. he doesnt interact much with harry melling outside of feeding him and helping him piss and get dressed. u get the sense that he doesnt really see his disabled actor as an actual person, but more of an entertaining object or a pet. and this becomes even more apparent when the irishman gets some competition from another traveling entertainer who has a chicken that can do math. he sees this chicken getting more money than him, so he buys it off of the other guy and takes it with him. and finally, the poor limbless actor is literally and figuratively tossed aside for the next best thing.

man oh man what a great segment! harry melling blew me away with his performance, the fact that he was able to get such a nuanced range of emotion out of the few lines he was given (basically he had to recite the same shit over and over again) was so impressive to me. and his non-verbal communication was really solid too. liam neeson did really well in his role too. and again the story itself is really great, simple but effective and really gets the point across without having to beat the audience over the head with its message. OH YEAH ITS REAL GOOD LOVE IT

and finally we have my #1 pick, which i think the directors knew this was the best one out of the bunch too cause its the first segment as well as the title of the whole movie. “The Ballad of Buster Scruggs” has that signature Coen brothers wit and dark humor that i love, it plays off of typical Western movie tropes and is very tongue-in-cheek and i ate that shit up. tim blake nelson as the titular buster is just so fucken perfect for this role, he really shines in this and its kind of a shame that its one of the shorter segments cause it really is the best one and he knocks it out of the park. we got some great music in this segment too, which is where that Best Original Song nom comes in. this one also has some strong fable-y vibes to it, like this story could be amongst the likes of American folklore like Paul Bunyan and Johnny Appleseed. i wont get much into the plot of this one but i highly recommend watching it, even if you dont wanna see the rest of the segments.

the segments fit together pretty well overall, although the tone of each of them differs slightly the fact that the setting and time period are the same is enough to firmly knit all these stories together. its a really unique idea for a movie, and is so far the best attempt at an anthology movie that ive ever seen purely because the stories really all make sense together and play off of each other well. in other anthology movies ive seen like The ABC’s of Death the segments usually dont have much at all to do with each other, except that they all fall in the same genre. so overall id say give this a watch, especially if ur a Coen brothers fan, cause theres some real good stuff in here.

well thats all i got for now cowboys!! i watched Roma the other day and CRIED REAL HARD so get ready for me to kiss that movies ass in a review that should be done in the next few days. until then go uuhhhhhh lasso a cow or something. chew some tobaccy. fondle a barmaids titties. die of dysentery. y’know just old west things~

4 notes · View notes

lostpioneer · 6 years

Text

Can’t Sit Down and Write? Same Dude

Alright, buddy, I’m going to lay this out flat on you, whoever you are. I’m absolute garbage at writing. I don’t just mean skill, I mean all aspects- Commitment, focus, grammar (though I try my hardest,) and pretty much anything you can think of, I’m bad at. I probably have more unfinished writing ideas than I have days left on this Earth, and I can never dedicate myself to just one idea. Even short stories, besides ones I wrote back in middle school that I pretend don’t exist, remain unfinished and collecting virtual dust in my computer files while I do literally anything besides write.

The one strength I might possibly have, though? I soak up anything- And I mean anything- that I can about writing. Tips and tricks, websites, apps, styles- Everything I can get my hands on. So here’s my grand idea: I’m going to write this blog in an attempt to help other people like me, and maybe even people that don’t have the same issues I have.

The way I see it is writing is a complex art- And just like in any other type of art, you want the best tools you can possibly obtain. Like paintbrushes for watercolor, or graphite pencils for visual art. Those tools help you do better in whichever focus you have, so shouldn’t writing tools do the same?

You can argue that writing comes from within, from years of teaching, and I get that and agree with it- but there’s nothing wrong with a little extra help.

So, here are some of my (im)perfect tips for perfect writing.

- Sit your ass down. I’m sure a lot of you have heard this one but I can’t stress it enough. It is an extremely important aspect of writing that can start as a building block for success. When you make yourself sit down at your desk and put pen to paper (or fingers to keys,) it helps you commit yourself to the project even more.

- Set word goals. There’s a lot of neat sites and programs that can help you keep track of your word and character counts, and these sites usually come with extra functions as well, so it never hurts to “shop” around. The point of this, though, is to have realistic goals. Of course, the end goal is to finish your paper, end the novel, or complete your short story, but you need smaller goals in between, especially if your project is a rather large one. Think like a chapter or two a day, or 1,000-1,600 words a day. These are just random values I shoot for, but yours don’t have to be as extensive- Just set the goal. When you get to a certain word goal, there’s a sense of accomplishment that can follow, and even sometimes you’ll have the urge to keep on trudging through it. Writing is also a pain sometimes, which is why word goals are so important- Set small ones if you get easily restless, or you don’t have a lot of free time to set aside. The important thing is having a goal you can reach, or at least get close to.

- Write first, Edit later. Now this may sound easier than it is, and for some people (me in particular,) I have an insanely difficult time not editing on the way. And sometimes that’s okay. I usually find myself just fixing a word or grammar error, like a missing period or misspelled word. What I mean about not editing is when you stop your writing and go back to review what you’ve done. This is okay if you’ve found a good stopping point or reached a goal, but to backtrack in the middle of a writing process can hurt your workflow and get your mind off the current task. As painful as it might sound, sometimes you have to grit your teeth and push through that nagging urge to double-check what you’ve done.

- Take breaks (if you need to.) If you’re anything like me, you might have a hard time sitting and clacking at your keyboard for more than 20 or 30 minutes at a time (I can barely manage that.) So the logical way to stop yourself from getting worn out is to just take a break. Watch a YouTube video, look at Pinterest or Tumblr, or IG- Anything you want. The key here is to give your mind time to process something different and keep it from getting worn out on the same thing. The other key is to return to your writing once you’ve given your mental muscles time to breathe. It’s a weird thing to balance, but if you can find one, it does wonders.

· Find a writing buddy. Now this is a recent one for me, but it also helps a lot with your consistency. Basically find a friend or relative that bears a similar interest in writing that you do, one that can go through the journey of writing with together. If you can’t find someone that will write with you, at least find a friend that can hold you accountable. A good way to do it is ask them if they can keep you responsible- Tell them what you’re writing, what your daily word goals are, what times during the day you’ll be writing. It’s a new experience for me but I 100% recommend it to anyone that struggles with staying committed.

- Find an idea and stick with it. This is probably the hardest one for me personally. I have so many ideas that I’d love to see played out in stories and novels, but I can never make myself focus on just one. And that’s the key- You have to find the one. Now, it doesn’t mean you can’t have other ideas, but unless you’re an amazing multitasker, you need to focus on the one that you’re working on then and there. If I had a dollar for any idea that distracted me from finishing another idea, I’d be rich enough to hire someone else to write this for me. (Not really, I’d probably spend it on candy bars or something, but you get my point. Right?)

So those are just a few ideas off the top of my head. I might come back to this post at some later date to add more if any come to mind, or just start a new post entirely; call it part two or something. But that’s it for now on the Tips!

So below here, I’m going to list some of my favorite apps/websites that enable writing, ones that I personally enjoy and why I enjoy them. Here goes:

- sta.sh: Nothing too special here, basically just a free writing tool that’s similar (though not as extensive) as Microsoft Word. The cool thing about it is that it’s 100% free, all you need is a DeviantArt account. Sta.sh is 1005 online and backs up your files online as well automatically. It’s all private as well- No one else can see your stuff except for you, and if you do want to show it off, it generates a shareable link for your projects. Another cool perk is that you can store stuff besides writing, like pictures or videos.

- Wordcounter.net: Kind of a similar format, but the importance of it is basically in the website name. It counts up your word and character counts, but also a few other interesting things, like how long it would take someone to read your material. The site also determines your “reading level” based on the type of words and such that you use (though you should take it with a grain of salt.)

- Draftin.com: A free online website that just lets you write. An interesting mode it has, though, would be the “Hemingway Mode.” When you select this, you literally cannot change anything. I mean it- Try to backspace, nope. Try to highlight a word to retype it, nope. You can only go forward- Which could be either the greatest or the most infuriating thing you’ll ever see. Either way, I think it’s pretty neat.

- HemingwayApp.com: You would think that this site would have been the ones to come up with that neat little perk, but nah. This one’s still pretty cool, though- it has a writing mode and editing mode. The writing mode is very simple- Just write, nothing special aside from basic editing like bold, italics, etc. But the editing part shows a few neat things: sentence length, grammar errors (to a point) how many adverbs you have, and alternative phrases you can use. It’s pretty nifty if you ask me.

- Writer.Bighugelabs.com: My oh my, this one takes the cake for me. Call me weird, but I’m a sucker for certain sounds, and the clicking sound of a typewriter is among my favorites. So this app makes your keyboard sound just like that, as well as saving anything you write in the browser. Any time you leave, it’s automatically saved, and anytime you come back it pulls it right back up. The app is 100% free, but there is a pro membership if you want to go above and beyond the normal benefits of it.

- Hanxwriter: Now this is an iPhone app that is pretty much the same as the one above- make your phone keyboard sound like a typewriter. That’s it. But if you ask me, it’s the greatest thing ever, so go take a look.

- WriterDuet: Now I haven’t dipped my feet too far into this one, but from what I’ve seen I’m impressed. Once again, a phone app (unsure if it’s iPhone exclusive) that assists with your writing, and it’s really helpful for structuring scripts and the like.

- Notebook.ai: This right here? This is the mother-load. I don’t even care what you’re writing, but you need to check this out. It’s a website that helps you collect all your world building ideas or even ideas for papers or essays. (Just mostly for world building) It asks you important questions about your universe as well, and there are too many awesome perks to talk about on this blog- Just check it out! You won’t regret it.

- cerey.github.io/fighters-block: This is a fun, cute lil’ app that can push you intensely, or just give you some polite nudges. Basically you set a word goal and you have to keep writing, otherwise, the big bad monster will beat you up. Like I said, kind of cute, definitely entertaining.

That’s about all I have for now! Like I said, I might come back to this post to add new stuff later on, but I’m fresh out of ideas at the moment. If anyone reads this, I hope I was able to help in some way or another!

Just remember guys and gals: Dedication is the biggest but most important step. Just write- worry about everything else later.

P.S. Let me know if I should add screencaps of these apps/websites, or if I should just leave it as it is. Peace!

#writing #dedication #sityourassdown #commit #tipsandtricks

4 notes · View notes

teainbostonharbor · 6 years

Text

Love Letters Leading

A/N: So I wrote this fanfic for @i-is-gazebo! It’s for the IT Secret Valentine thing, and i’m deciding to upload it now. I hope you enjoy!

Pairing: Reddie

Word Count: 1.7k

letter one. dear eddie, i love you. ive loved you since we were 12. i don’t even know if you love me back, but I needed to tell you. I’ve been keeping it in for so long. You’re just so cute, you kill me every time i see you. You’re funny too. And Nice. And sweet. And caring, Just everything under the sun. I don’t know how you don’t see that I love you. Maybe you’re just an oblivious fuck. love, your secret admirer

letter two. dear eddie, I hope you liked the rose i left in your locker as well as the letter. Don’t worry, i’ll tell you who I am soon. I’m just not ready yet. This is a big thing I guess. I do actually love you, by the way. I’m not trying to prank you or anything. I’m trying to be sweet. I want you to feel loved because you fucking deserve it. You deserve all the love in the world, and I hope one day I can show you that. love, your secret admirer

letter three dear eddie, today I wanted to mention how smart you are. You always study your ass off and get good grades. You love fixing things and reading. I think it’s cute. Fuck. Everything about you is cute. Like the reading glasses you wear sometimes. Or how sleepy you look the day of a test. God, this is coming off as creepy isn’t it? I just want to tell you but it needs to wait. love, your secret admirer

letter four dear eddie, if you haven’t noticed, i’m doing this leading up to valentine’s day. On valentine’s day, i’m gonna actually tell you who i am. so be prepared to get roses and one of these letters everyday. it’ll be better on valentine’s, though. i have something planned. love, your secret admirer

letter five dear eddie, i’m sorry if i sound weird sometimes. i don’t know how to write love letters or how love even works. i just wanna swoon you for fucks sake. I don’t even know if it’s working and i’m so sorry. please don’t think i’m weird? love, your secret admirer

letter six dear eddie, how are you? good? good. I hope you’re good. i wanna see you happy, because that makes me happy. also, you’re adorable. too bad it isn’t summer and you can’t wear shorts. i like the oversized sweaters, too, though. very cute. very cool sense of fashion, unlike me. i’m rambling, love, your secret admirer

letter seven dear eddie, well, i suppose these letter things are halfway over with. you enjoying it? i can’t wait for valentine’s. i just hope you like me back. i doubt it, and this is all stupid. i’m stupid. but you aren’t! you sweet lil hunny bun love, your secret admirer

letter eight dear eddie, these things just keep getting shorter and shorter. i don’t really know what to write. i guess i’m bad at expressing things. god, you probably hate me. i’m not smart, im just a stupid teenage boy in love. in love with you. everything you do. down to the littlest things. i can’t help but smile every time i see you. you make me so happy, eddie. love, your secret admirer

letter nine dear eddie, four more days, my love. i can’t wait, and i know you can’t either. it’s gonna be great. thanks for putting up with me for all these years. it’s been fun. i can’t wait to make more memories too. they’re gonna be the funnest ones. as long as you like me back, though. gotta remember that this might ruin our friendship. wow. love, your secret admirer

letter ten dear eddie, god, i’m really running out of ideas without sounding creepy. guess i’ll just go for it. i’ve been wanting to kiss you since we were young. sure, we’ve kissed before but on the cheek. that’s different. that’s friendly. i don’t want friendly. i want boyfriends. love, your secret admirer

letter eleven dear eddie, two more days. two more till the big day. the day i hope will go smooth. i’ll probably stammer and say something wrong, but please don’t hate me. please. i just want a good life and future with you whether we’re friends or not. you looked extra cute yesterday by the way <3 love, your secret admirer

letter twelve dear eddie, one more letter till the day. this is gonna be awesome. just you n me eddie, on a date. i hope, im so happy it isn’t on a school day. i know you get bullied sometimes. this way, i can give you all of your gifts and stuff and no one will know. i’m okay if you want to keep us a secret. i know you’ve told some people, though. love, your secret admirer

letter thirteen dear eddie, tomorrow’s the day! are you excited? because i am! well, i’m more nervous. like, really nervous. i’m afraid you’ll reject me. i just wanna be with you, godammit. it’ll happen, i hope. maybe i’m im just as oblivious as you and we both like each other. that’s a possibility. but probably not. i’ve been waiting for this for years. i just hope nothing bad happens or i don’t fuck it up. i’ll see your cute ass tomorrow. i’ll meet you at your house around noon. love, your secret admirer

Eddie.

Eddie blushed like a madman whenever he got one of the letters. He had never expecting to have a secret admirer, or have them write love letters and leave roses. It was sweet, and he was excited to tell the other losers about it. However, he had no clue who it could be.

He’s one of the few openly gay kids at the school, but the other two were already dating each other. So it couldn’t be them. He also guessed that there could be others in the closet, or others that are only out to their friends. The losers were mostly open to just them, but Eddie came out to everyone on the same day. That’s a story for another day, though. He also guessed that it was someone close to him, and had a few classes with him. He never expected it to be any of the losers, let alone Richie Tozier. He should’ve known better, though. Little did he know, Richie was quite infatuated with him. All the losers saw it, and Richie was right. Eddie is an oblivious fuck. He didn’t think twice when Richie called him cute or heldhim or kissed his cheek. It was normal. They had always been like that. Eventually he realized he did like Richie. But Richie didn’t need to know that. Richie always flirted with him, and made jokes and stuff like that. Richie thought Eddie knew, and he grew tired of them just not being together. So he decided to write the letters and tell Eddie his feelings on valentine’s. The perfect plan, right? Right. Richie grew nervous as the day approached. He knew Eddie was excited at the idea of a relationship, but he feared rejection. Eddie seemed so happy when he told them about the letters, he just didn’t want it to end up badly. But it wouldn’t. Feb. 14th

Eddie paced around his room nervously. He had no clue who it was, or how it was going to go. He couldn’t pick out what to wear, or what he’d say. He became frustrated, and ended up taking a short shower. After that he waited. And waited. And waited. Time wasn’t passing quickly for some reason. Everything was slow. To pass time, he decided to sit at his desk and do some homework. His mind was obviously preoccupied, though. He couldn’t focus on anything. He felt like he was going to die from embarrassment and nervousness, but he could handle it. At least he tried to convince himself he could. He decide to try and focus again before he heard something bouncing off his window. He walked over to it slowly, eyes widening when he looked out of it. There stood Richie Tozier with a bouquet of flowers, a giant teddy bear, and a box of chocolates. Eddie quickly grabbed his phone, and checked the time. He couldn’t believe Richie, of all people, was his secret admirer. He should’ve guessed, but he hadn’t given it much thought. His mind was racing at a thousand miles a minute but it was quickly interrupted by Richie shouting, “Hey! Will you let me in? I’m freezing my ass off out here.” Eddie slid his window open. “I’ll let you in through the front door. I don’t think you can get up here with all that stuff.” And with that, Eddie ran downstairs to the front door. He was shaking nervously. This was the guy that liked him. And he liked him back. He took a deep breath, and placed his hand on the door knob. Slowly, he opened it. He was greeted by a grinning Richie with an arms full of presents. Eddie was speechless. No one had ever gone out of their way to write letters or get him gifts. He couldn’t believe that his crush went out of his way to write letters and get him gifts. He couldn’t believe it. Richie’s smile quickly faltered when Eddie said nothing and just stared. “I-I’m sorry… you probably don’t even like me. I knew I did too much..” Eddie panicked. “N-No! I-I like you. I have for a long time too. I’m just… speechless? I can’t believe you went out of your way to do this.” “Really?” he asked, his smile quickly returning. “Since sixth grade.” “So all of this is fine? Dinner too?” “You planned dinner too?” “Um… yeah? I kinda wanted today to be perfect and special.” Eddie grinned. “It’s perfect.” And so was their relationship from that point on.

epilogue six months later “Ever wonder what would’ve happened if you never wrote the letters?” It was a typical hot summer evening. They were laying in bed, limbs practically tangled together. Richie was messing with Eddie’s hair, occasionally peppering his face in kisses. “Yeah. I don’t think we would’ve ever gotten together.” “I don’t think we would’ve either. We’re both gay and dumb.” Richie grinned. “Yeah. Gay and dumb.” They laid like that for a while, not moving albeit them both being sweaty messes in the heat. Richie leaned in, pressed a kiss to Eddie’s cheek before whispering, “I love you Eddie Kaspbrak.” It was a perfect first.

#reddie #fanfic #nate writes #richie tozier #eddie kaspbrak #IT #love letters leading #valentines day

84 notes · View notes