#also also my bf is open to getting me like. another ring in 10 years or something

[jnnul]

jaanu's tumblr wrapped

general stats!

total words written (only released fics) - 60,821 words (avg. 3.5k words per fic)

total fics released - 17 fics

total groups/people written for - 4 groups (17 people total)

total wips left - 8 fics (2/10 completed)

total songs recs - 24 songs

total fic recs - 10 fics

top fics this year (by the numbers)!

ric flair drip (jaehyun - nct)

ready for love (jeno - nct)

five questions (mark - nct)

things he reminds me of (nct dream)

'i love you' (enhypen)

fics i loved writing the most (and three words/phrases for how i feel abt them)!

ric flair drip - cathartic. eye opening. midnight blue.

things he reminds me of - aesthetics. how i see the world. types of beauty.

nct dream in college - fun. silly. close to home.

your love is my favorite color (enhypen) - learning through love. choices. part two?

a phone that won't ring (minji - newjeans) - acceptance. hurt. comfort.

fics i loved reading this year (fic rec blog ver.)!

i've waffled a little too much abt how much i love these fics on my fic rec blog (although, honestly i think they deserve even more praise) so similar to above, i'm just going to put three words that i feel describes the fic/how i felt reading the fic/the type of love in the fic.

cherry girl (jaemin - nct) - @tyonfs - realistic. omg! modern romance.

the v week spy (jaehyun - nct) - @smileysuh - the best type of campy. what a plot! surprisingly innocent.

sweet cream, cold brew (mark - nct) - @lucyandthepen - here comes the boy. what a sweetheart. go getter or go get her?

the kids are going to be alright (s.coups - svt) - @wondernus - mistakes & memories. me too, honestly. love conquers all.

besties gone sexual (jaemin - nct) - @tyonfs - how did they not realize? ahh, that's why. situationship meets best friends.

people i loved talking to and my faves works from them!

@m-arkmywords (zo 🐨) - omg my first moot! you made me feel so happy and comfortable to come back to this app. you're such an incredibly talented artist and writer (and best supplier of stoner!mark in town) and i'm so glad i got to speak and learn from/abt you these year! (fav - strawberry sorbet)

@sungie (drew 🐥) - the single most sweet person i know! you're incredibly talented and so much fun to talk to. you always carry yourself with such bright and positive energy that it's almost infectious through the screen and i'm almost always smiling when i see you come across my dash. (fav - how the genshin characters love)

@hanlimz (cass 🐑) - a government assigned cutie patootie, honestly. your jungwon hours (open 24/7) are so cute to watch and you're such an easy person to talk to! your energy is always so soft and welcoming and idk how you do it but you're always so incredibly relatable? (fav - midnight thoughts)

@mingyuonthemoon (moon 🐻) - THE mingyu girlie. you've always got the best taste in music, writing, and men; i aspire to be like you. you give writers so much energy and encouragement in their work and you're such a talented writer yourself (even if you don't reveal it) and are always so sweet!

@haespoir (mia 🦋) - the funniest person ever omg. you're so incredibly witty and the way that you write the different nct members is so funny and yet relatable. still somewhat convinced that you're haechan in disguise (have you ever seen mia and haechan in the same room?) (fav - bf!jaehyun)

@nyxvrse (nyx 🐯) - also the sweetest person ik! iconic on another level and also the social butterfly of the century. if paris hilton had a direct reincarnation, it might be you bc of the sheer amount of serving you both do. super sweet, easy to talk to, and also occasionally pop by to brighten my day w smth sweet in the inbox!

@lelengerine (lua 🦚) - i was so excited to meet you bc you were my first '04 friend and also you are SO incredibly talented at writing! i was over the moon when i found out that your blog was recommended similar to mine bc your writing actually makes me feel the feels when i read it! (fav - waiting)

@smileysuh (nova 🦁) - another brilliant writer omg! i remember going through a psychological evolution when i write v day week spy and am, to this day, attached to jaehyun from that fic. your writing always serves so hard and you write the characters themselves in such a way that it's hard not to fall in love w them! (fav - sunday kind of love)

@ohmygs-blog (bae 🦊) - like another one of the most iconic people ik tbh. your text fics always serve so hard and i might actually be developing parasocial feelings for jaemin bc of the way you write him. lowk also i could see the dreamies act texting the way you write them and you also might be jisung in disguise idk (fav - jealous fwb!dreamies)

@polarisjisung (hua 🦢) - we may be the same age but you are still my bb gurl! so sweet, so elegant, and so intelligent. you're my fellow stem sufferer and just such a good person in general and i can't imagine 2023 w/o you! you also have an amazing taste in music and we're so similar that i'm half-convinced that we're secretly twins! (fav - makeup, make-out)

@jammingjaem (lex 🐶) - actually freaked my shit when i found out you were filo bc you were responding to someone in filo and i swear i have the fattest crush on you. you also may or may not have invented the clean girl agenda (with the journaling esp!) and you always seem so sweet and put together omg. can't wait to get to know you better in 2024! (fav - bf!jeno)

#jnnul #janani’s jaans <3 #zo 🐨 #drew 🐥 #cass 🐑 #mia 🦋 #nyx 🐯 #moon 🐻 #lua 🦚 #nova 🦁 #bae 🦊 #hua 🦢 #lex 🐶

[writer-k-pop]

Your Sister’s Keeper

여기 있고 어딘가에서 길을 잃지 않는 것이 좋다. It’s better that she’s here and not lost somewhere.

Description: Over the duration of your relationship with Vernon, his sister, Sofia, and you have become quite close. Close enough that in a time of need, she calls for you, not Vernon. Warnings: Mentions of cheating and swearing Genre: Angst? BF!Vernon x Fem!Reader Word Count: 2.9k

Seventeen Masterlist | Masterlists

"Yes, mom," I roll my eyes, still facing the wall. "I will. I'll call Grandma later."  I glance back at Vernon who is patiently waiting just a few feet away at the entrance of the company party. Other guests keep entering the venue, their suits tailored to perfection and their dresses emphasizing all the right parts. I catch his gaze and I throw an apologetic look to him.

"Mom, mom." I say to her to get her attention so she stops talking, "I have to go. I will call you and Grandma later."

"Alright. Have fun with Vernon." My mom says goodbye and then hangs up.

I end the call and turn towards Vernon as I put my phone back in my purse. Just as the phone is fully inside, it vibrates with another incoming call. Without looking at the caller ID, I answer.

"Mom, I told you-"

"(y/n)?" Sofia's voice stops me in my tracks, "Don't say my name. I know you're with my brother and he can't know." Then she sniffles.

I turn away from Vernon's line of sight, "What's wrong? Are you okay?"

She sniffles again and I can tell she's trying hard not to completely lose it. "Uhm, not really. Can-Can I come over?"

I glance up towards the ceiling, "I mean, I'm not home right now but I can be in like 10 minutes." I offer, internally regretting the lie I'm going to have to tell Vernon.

"I'm already here, can I just go inside?" She sniffles some more.

I find myself nodding though she can't see me, "Yeah, yeah, of course. The passcode is the same and there's some leftovers in the fridge if you need them."

"Th-thank you." She stutters and I hear the elevator ding in the background.

"I'll be there soon. Just hold on." I tell her, refraining from using her name, then we hang up. As I turn back towards Vernon, he walks towards me with a look of concern etched into his face.

"What's wrong?" He asks, reaching me.

I take a deep breath and spit out a lie, "I have to go, Vernon. My friend is having a really bad time and she's already at my apartment."

Vernon's face slowly switches to concern about my "friend."

"Yeah, yeah, go. If they need you go. I can go alone, it's fine." Vernon states and squeezes my shoulder. "Just let me know when you get home and update me."

I give him a small smile and nod, "I will. I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry, just go." He smiles warmly and gently pushes me towards the exits.

Feeling terrible for lying but knowing his sister is on the brink of a break down at my apartment, I pick up the skirt of my dress and walk outside. Once I flag down a taxi and hop in the backseat, I tell the driver my address and send Sofia an "on my way" text.

Watching the streetlights pass, I fiddle with the sleeves of my dress as I wonder what is happening with Sofia. As the taxi slows outside my building, I pay him and quickly shuffle out of the car and up to my apartment. I have to stop a few times to collect parts of my dress that decide not to stay in my hands.

I punch in my passcode at the speed of lightening and throw the door open.

"Sofia?" I call out into my still dark apartment.

"Here." Her meek voice whispers from my bedroom.

When I walk in, Sofia's sat against my headboard with my extra fuzzy blanket wrapped tightly around her. I quickly walk over to her and envelope her in a hug. She leans into my chest and I feel her shoulders sink.

"It's okay, I'm here now." I reassure her, "Let me get out of this dress and then we can talk." She silently nods and straightens up allowing me to head to my closet.

"Where were you?" Sofia quietly asks, glancing at my dress.

"I was accompanying your brother for some company end of year party." I inform her, slipping the dress off my body.

"What did you tell him?" She questions me, worriedly.

I shake my head, "I didn't tell him anything. I only said that one of my friends was having a really bad day and needed me immediately. Which wasn't exactly a lie."

"He would believe something like that." Sofia jokes lightly.

"Gives us the advantage." I reply, leaving the dress on the floor and changing into sweats and a sweatshirt.

Climbing back into bed, I take her back in my arms and sigh into her hair.

"Do you want to talk about it?" I ask after a few seconds of silence.

She shakes her, "Not yet."

I nod and continue to hold her while she begins to let her tears out. We sit in silence as she cries and I do my best to nonverbally tell her that I'm here and that everything will be okay. My heart breaks with every labored breath she takes in. I begin to wonder what has made her this upset and slowly the anger also rises. How could anyone do something so horrible to such a lovely girl?

"C-can I have some water?" Sofia hiccups.

"Yeah, yeah. I'll be right back." I tell her and scoot off the bed. After filling a glass, I head back to the bed and guide the glass into her hands.

"Thanks." She says after gulping down some.

"So, tell me what's goin' on." I sit in front of her.

She glances down, "I, I saw Ryan kissing another girl."

I suck in a breath and my eyes widen in shock.  "Wha- what happened?" I feel the shock punch me in the gut.

"I, I was going to pick him up from his work and surprise him but," Sofia takes in a deep breath, "I got across the street and he walks out with some girl and then kisses her. Right out in the open." Fresh tears make their way down her cheeks and I do my best to wipe them away but they keep falling. "And I couldn't even move. I didn't even know my feet were moving until I was at your building door. And, and, (y/n) it feels like my heart is being crushed by a million bricks and-"

I wrap her up tighter and rub her arm, "It'll be okay. Just keep breathing with me, yeah?"

"He just, right out in the open. For anyone to see." She sputters out, "Like he didn't care if one of my friends saw. Like he,  ugh what a, what a piece of trash."

"He doesn't know you know?" I wonder, staring at my blank wall.

Sofia shakes her head, "I was too shocked to do anything but walk away." She grabs the hem of my shirt in her fist, "I can't believe I actually fell for him. Why didn't I see it before? He's sleazy and awful and what kind of man cheats?"

"He's not a man." I answer her, "A real man doesn't cheat. A real man is loyal and responsible."

"He's not a real man." Sofia mumbles, her tears quietly ever so slightly but not stopping.

We sit together on my bed long enough for the moon to travel quite a distance in the sky. During that time, I run through all the possible things I would do the boy who hurt Sofia while her cries quiet down.

"I'm kind of hungry." She sniffles, readjusting to sit up.

"Did you not eat dinner?" I look at her and she simply shakes her head. Simultaneously I'm reminded that I also haven't eaten.

"I planned on getting dinner with h-him but well... that didn't happen." She explains and I quickly jump off the bed.

"What do you want?" I ask her.

"Something warm." She replies with a small smile that must've taken her a lot of strength.

I nod, "I'll heat up some left over warm chicken soup. And then we can watch movies until either the suns comes up or our eyes droop all on their own."

I make my way to the kitchen and pull out the containers from the fridge. As I pour the soup into a pot, my bedroom door creaks open. I look up to see Sofia peeking out with the blanket resting on her head.

"The room got lonely." She explains. I smile softly and motion for her to sit.

"You are always welcome to join me wherever I am." I reassure her.

Sofia hiccups.

"Do you want a change of clothes?" I question, turning to turn on the heat underneath the pot, "You're probably going to stay the night anyway."

She nods, "That'd probably be more comfy."

I point to my door, "Extra pajamas should be in the middle drawer of the dresser closest to the bedroom doo-"

The doorbell cuts me off. Confused, I walk over to the little screen that shows me who's ringing my door bell. Vernon stands in front of my door, his hands stuffed into his pockets and lips pursed, patiently and anxiously waiting for me to answer.

"Sofia, go into my room and get changed. I'll try to get him to leave." I look to her and she immediately runs into my bedroom, closing the door securely behind her.

Once I hear the definite click, I walk over and open the door halfway.

"Hey." I smile, sticking my head into the space.

"Hey." Vernon smiles, "Everything okay? How's your friend?" He asks.

He's still in his attire for the company party but he's undone his tie and a few buttons of his shirt.

I nod, "She's in pretty bad shape now but she'll be okay."

"I just wanted to check on you cause you never texted me." Vernon explains his visit and I mentally facepalm myself.

"Sorry about that. I mean I got home and well, yeah. It's been a little crazy. Sorry." I apologize again.

Vernon shakes his head, "Don't be. You've been helping a friend and that's admira..ble..." He trails off as his gaze moves past me. "Are those Sofia's shoes?" He points towards the ground.

I turn my head and spot her favorite pair of tennis shoes. They're her favorite because Vernon custom made them for her birthday last year. She wears them everywhere.

"Is Sofia here?" Vernon's tone suddenly turns concerned. "Is she the pers- Sofia!" He pushes the door open and rams past me. "Sofia!"

"Vernon." I rest a hand on his shoulder. "Stop."

"My sister called you and you lied to me about it?" He turns towards me in bewilderment.

"Vernon." I repeat his name but he doesn't let me talk further.

"Why would you lie to me about it?" He questions, "It's my sister. My baby sister." His voice begins to rise in volume, "Why you and why not call me?"

I grab both of his shoulders tightly, "Because some subjects are best left to discuss between girls and not her older brother. At least not right away." He rests his hand over one of mine and sighs. "Just trust me when I say that she's here and she'll be okay."

"What happened?" Vernon asks, his eyes pleading with me.

"I can't tell you. It's not my place to tell." I shake my head in small motions. "When she's ready, she'll tell you but right now, this was the only place she could think of to come. And I don't know about you, Vern, but I'm glad she chose here over anywhere else."

Vernon nods in agreement and takes a deep breath to calm himself, "You're right. It's better that she's here and not lost somewhere."

"She's safe here. I'll make sure of it. But for now, it's probably not the best for you to be here." I hate that I have to say it but it's not entirely false. "Just make sure you're not too far away. She's going to need her big brother sooner rather than later."

He gives my hand a squeeze and presses a kiss to my forehead. "You'll call me with updates?"

I nod, "I promise. You'll know when I know."

"Just," Vernon looks around at the ground unsure of how exactly to put it, "Just remind her that I'm here if she needs me."

"I do." Sofia chokes back a sob and in an instant Vernon has her wrapped in his arms. A new wave of tears wets his shirt as her grip on him tightens. "What am I going to do?" She cries into his chest. I can see Vernon's heart break with every word and I can feel mine break just the same.

"What's going on? Can you tell me that?" He pulls back slightly to look at her pained face but quickly wraps her up again. Pulling her towards the couch, he tries to get the story out of her while also comforting him. I, on the other hand, continue to stir the pot of chicken soup in the kitchen.

I listen to her choke out the story again and I constantly switch from stirring to watching Vernon's face for any movement.

Once Sofia is done reciting, Vernon runs a hand over his face and lets out a frustrated sigh. "Asshole." He mutters. "And he doesn't know that you know?" He questions to which Sofia shakes her head. "I should go murder him. He's an awful human being who- ugh, just wait until I get my hands on him." He angrily rants leaving me in a bit of a shock because I haven't ever seen him this riled up. Though it makes sense. It is his little sister after all.

"What am I going to do, Vernon?" Sofia asks looking up at him.

Vernon takes a breath to collect himself before answering. "Well, first of all, you are going to break it off with him. You don't need a lying and cheating boy. You deserve a much better person, a real man."

"What comes after that?" Sofia questions.

"After that..." Vernon pauses then looks to me for help finishing the plan.

"After that," I repeat and walk over to sit on the coffee table in front of Sofia, "You are going to heal and you are going to get better. You are going to live your life to the fullest and make him realize what a terrible mistake he made by cheating on you. Then even if he comes back asking for a second chance, you'll have the strength to simply smile at him and walk away."

Sofia sniffles and wipes her eyes. "I will?"

"You will." Vernon confirms.

"But I feel like shit." She pouts, fresh tears glistening in her eyes.

"Just for now." I quickly remind her, "That's normal. Completely and absolutely normal. But soon, you will start to feel better."

"And mom, dad, (y/n), your friends, and I will all be there every step of the way." Vernon continues and Sofia nods in understanding.

I pat her knee, "Let's get us some food. I'm sure that might help a little."

Vernon gave me a look of surprise, "You guys haven't eaten?"

I shrug, "Like I said, it got a little crazy when I got home. Do you want any?" I ask him as I walk towards the kitchen but he shakes his head.

"I'm still full from the party." He answers.

I pull out two bowls from the cabinet and fill them both with steaming soup. Picking up two spoons and the two bowls, I make my way back to the living room and set the bowls down on the coffee table.

Sitting on the floor, I begin eating, my eyes never straying from signs that Sofia might need something else. Vernon helps Sofia sip the soup and slowly she starts to eat with more energy.

"You don't have to help me." She mutters, finally taking the bowl from Vernon's hands.

Vernon shrugs, "I want to."

Once the soup is finished, Sofia's eyes refuse to stay open and Vernon carries her into my bed while I sort out the dishes. Just as I set the pot on the drying rack, Vernon walks back out, closing the bedroom door behind him.

"Alright, where does this prick of an ass live?" Vernon half-whispers, half-yells, his palms pressed into the countertop.

I dry my hands, "She needs you here. Not looking to beat up some boy who's not worth your time." I tell him.

"She'll be okay, right?" Vernon suddenly asks, his shoulders drooping deeply.

Throwing the towel somewhere near the sink, I walk behind him and hug his waist. "She will be. I don't know when but I know she will be."

Vernon turns around and clasps his hands behind my back, "Thank you." He kisses the top of my head.

I let out a tiny chuckle, "You don't have to thank me. If it were my sibling, you would've done the same."

"True, but still, thank you." He squeezes my body to emphasize his point.

"You're welcome." I turn my head and glance at the clock. "We should probably go to sleep too." I pull away and bring out one of the many extra blankets I have, "You take the bed with Sofia, I'll take the couch." [For those who think siblings sleeping in the same bed is weird: fight me.]

"Are you sure?" Vernon asks, worried that I won't sleep well.

"I'm sure. She needs you more than I do tonight." I reassure him.

He walks over, wraps me another tight hug, then presses a kiss to my lips which I reciprocate.

"Goodnight." He rests his forehead on mine for a second.

"Goodnight."

#seventeen #seventeen imagine #seventeen vernon #severnteen vernon imagine #vernon imagine #chwe vernon imagine #chwe vernon #chwe hansol #chwe hansol imagine

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #394

“just want one thing  /  just to play the king  /  but the castle’s crumbled and you’re left with just a name  /  where’s your crown, king nothing?”

Do you have your ears pierced more than once? Yeah; I have two in my earlobes and my right tragus pierced. I used to have a cartilage and anti-tragus piercing, but they closed when I had to take them out at the hospital. -_- Do you use an electric toothbrush? Yep. Have you ever seen a queen bee outside its hive? I don't believe so? Have you ever used Duolingo? No. Do you think the number 13 is unlucky? No. Which Clue (or Cluedo) character is your favourite? I always played Scarlet because I thought she was pretty. Do you have any novelty ice cube trays? No. Have you ever had a bad experience meeting a bf’s/gf’s parents? No. Do you get sick of eating turkey during the holidays? I don't eat turkey because I don't like it. I have honey spiral ham instead. Have you ever danced on a table? No. Did you have a lot of fun as a little kid? Yeah. Is there someone you can talk to all day, never running out of stuff to say? Some days. Ham or turkey? Ham. Would you rather eat nothing but fruits or nothing but cheese sandwiches? Fruit. What’s the last song you sung along to? I think Shinedown's "Get Up" while I was in the car. You get to be in any tv series or movie. (old/new) What are you choosing? Let's seeee... maybe Wonderland! Do you meditate? No; it actually stresses me out because I can't completely clear my head. What’s your go-to song when you’re angry? "Headache" by Motionless In White is a good one. What do you think about the most? My weight, honestly. It's at least an itching thought in my head at ALL times. Just being able to feel that I'm overweight and simply glimpsing a fatty part of my body is so, so upsetting. I usually look in the mirror to see if my face is slimmer whenever I pass one, or I'll grasp a part of my body to just feel if I've lost weight there. I could really go on and on about this, but I'd rather not, given it's depressing me talking about it. Have you ever visited any celebrity gravesites? No. How do you feel about archaeology? It's extremely fascinating to me. Any animals whose behaviors you find particularly interesting? ALL animals! Meerkats, however, quite obviously top my list. I love love love social animals, and their behaviors and deep connections remind me of just how human animals really can be, but honestly better half the time. What are your thoughts on gun control? There MUST be reform. I don't think entirely taking away the right to bear arms is the answer, but there needs, needs, NEEDS to be some serious tidying up regarding it. I believe it should be much more difficult to legally obtain a firearm with very extensive background checks and things of the like. I firmly do believe it would help SOME to prevent gun violence. Nothing is ever going to completely stop it unless firearms just cease to exist, but anything that helps reduce it is worth it. Would you have a big cat (like a tiger) for a pet if you could? Absolutely not. Big cats are extremely dangerous with strong hunting instincts, and besides putting my life at risk, I am not forcing a large animal into a small space. Do you like animals better than most humans? Sure as hell do. What simple things in life bring you the most joy? Hearing birds chirping in the morning, crickets and toads at night, starting my soda for the day (rip), watching snow fall, feeling a cool breeze on a nice day with the windows open, my pets wanting to cuddle... just to name a few. I massively appreciate the small things, so I could make this a very long list. What are your favorite smells? Cinnamon rolls, coffee, fresh baked bread, lilac, honeysuckles, etc. Ever found anything cool at a thrift store? What was it? Yeah! I've found some dragon figurines I use for decor, but the absolute coolest has to be this shipwreck lamp that I bought. I love flea markets. How do you find new music to listen to when you want it? YouTube recommendations, usually. Do you like all those dystopian future books/movies? They're all right. If you collect anything, what is your favorite piece of that collection? I collect two types of things: meerkat-oriented and Silent Hill stuff. My favorite part of my meerkat collection is Rebel, my super cute plushy that Jason got me. I slept with it for years and even now that we're done, I still hold the little guy very dear to me. My favorite SH piece I have is a limited edition, Japanese flyer for Silent Hill: Revelation that I won in a giveaway. How did you meet your significant other (if you have one)? N/A How did you meet your best friend? Via YouTube. Your favorite place to be aside from your home? Sara's house. Do you have any favorite books you’d like to have signed by the author? It'd be dooooope if I could have Tim Clutton-Brock sign my copy of Flower's biography. Do you like any board games or card games? I mean yeah. Not a lot, but some. What is your least favorite beverage? Of the things I've tried, probably black coffee. Do you like Breaking Benjamin? I do! What kind of music do you like? Metal, rock, alternative, and indie. Do you like guys with long hair? Yes. Have you ever seen an elephant? Yes. How many people of the opposite sex have you told you loved them? One, if you mean romantically. Do you and your mom get along? Yeah, we're really close. Have you ever had to change your phone number? Twice that I recall. I got a creepy text once, and another with threats. Ever been bitten by a spider? Not to my knowledge. When you were little did you jump in puddles? Oh, absolutely. Bugs: Cool or gross. Even though I'm scared of some of them, they're certainly still cool. Well, most. Do you wear a toe ring? No, I don't find those attractive at all. Have you ever had to babysit before? Twice, even though I didn't want to. Do you actually eat your fortune cookie, if you get one? Yeah, I like 'em. What's your favorite thing about cats? I enjoy how calm and independent they are. Salt, or pepper? I like both, but I prefer to have salt. Think of an ex. What's his favorite color? Jason's were green and purple. Which is better, the taste, or smell of coffee? I only like the smell. What item appears the most in your room? Meerkat stuff. Liquid eyeliner, is good, or totally sucks? My hands are WAY too shaky for that. Has a stray dog ever tried to bite you? No. Do you currently have any bug bites? No. Do you multitask well? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. Do you know what an "AMV" is? Yes, because I used to make them and am considering getting back into it. What’s one award show you have to watch every year? None. Who do you like more: the Batman or the Joker? The Joker. Have you ever had a pet rock? I don't recall, actually? I might have as a little kid. Haha, there was one April Fool's Day that Mark sold rocks with his mustached "M" on them, and I SO wanted one. He gave all the earnings to a charity that I can't remember, so that also really made me wanna get one, but yeah, I was NOT asking Mom for even a small amount of money for a rock, haha. She woulda been so fucking confused. Do you know anyone with a lazy eye? Knew, rather. Did your parents let you have pets when you were a kid? Yes. What band was on the last band t-shirt you wore? Ummmm... I'm not sure. Maybe Korn? What’s the last movie you watched at a friend’s house? Elf, I believe? Do you have any tattoos on your arms? Yep. Do you own a teapot? No. Did you have a GI Joe when you were a kid? No. What is the origin of your last name? Irish. Do you ever use the "n"-word? NO. What piercing do you like most on the opposite sex? It would depend on the person, but probably some sort of lip ring(s). What is your salad dressing of choice? Ranch, or the kind from Olive Garden. Have you ever written anything longer than 10 pages? Yes. I wrote a massive essay on toxic masculinity during my last college attempt. I got WAY more into it than I thought I would.

#survey #surveys #random questions #lyrics: ''king nothing'' by metallica

[jungshookz]

SIUFSHF so i was supposed to be doing homework until i got this idea!!!! so y/n gets sucked into this alternate universe and so do all of her s/o's and all of a sudden everyone is fighting over her??? like lifeguard jk is like heyo shes my bf and ceo yoongi is like shes my WIFE and mermaid jimin is like well i sacrificed my MERMAID TAIL to date her and its all just chaos

→ pairing: every single character eVER x reader

→ genre: ???? crackhead culture most likely ????

→ wordcount: 2.3k

→ notes: oH my god the moment i got this request i had to write it because i will jump at the chance to write anything that involves the clashing of universes.,.,. anyways i took kind of a monsters inc. approach with this drabble you will see what i mean by that 

first of all

you have no idea where the hell you are

and second of all

you have a splitting headache

it feels like there are tiny construction men drilling riGht into the depths of your skull and it is overall not a very pleasant feeling  

“oh my god…” you wince as you sit up and you press your hand against your forehead

you don’t remember what happened

one minute you were sitting at your desk working away at your paper that’s due in two days

the next thing you know it feels like you’re getting suCked into a black hole as crazy as that sounds??

then you just see colours whirling around you and you’re hearing sO many different sounds and-

well

now you’re

here?

but where is here exactly

you are sitting at the end of a very long corridor

in fact it’s so long that it doesn’t even look like it ever ends

on both sides of the corridor, there are multiple doors

they’re all about same size but they’re all unique in their own way

different colours

different materials

hm

well

it wouldn’t hurt to explore a bit

it doesn’t look like you have a choice anyway because there’s nowhere else to go

unless you wanna die in this weird corridor you better get a move on

you push yourself up off the ground with a grunt and nearly stumble over because wOo you stood up way too quickly

“what in the fresh hell is this…?” your brows furrow in confusion as you approach the first door

it’s bright red and right smAck dab in the middle of the door there’s a hose that’s just winded around itself

you pick up the hose and unravel it a bit and that’s when you notice there are words printed on the underside of the hose

‘firefighter!jungkook x y/n’

“firefighter jungkook and y/n…?”

what

what??

who the hell is jungkook

…,.,was he that guy u hooked up with two months ago

he was a firefighter??

there’s an angry looking red button right next to the door that says ‘don’t touch’ 

well

that’s not going to help because now you really wanna touch it 

you shake your head and tuck the hose back into place before moving onto the next one

god

maybe you’re going crazy

see this is what happens when you only get like 10 hours of sleep in the span of 48 hours

it’s not good for you!! and now you’re totally hallucinating

maybe this is a fever dream

anyways

how- how the heck is there half a coffee machine just sticking out of this door

‘barista!jungkook x y/n’

whaT

now this jungkook person is a barista??

how does he have the time to make coffee and put out fires at the same time wtf

you’re tempted to just open the door but at the same time lol u ain’t risKing anything popping out and scaring the shit outta you

you reach over to brush your fingers over the machine and you shriek in surprise when the nozzle suddenly hiSSes to life

this one has a red button next to it too 

in fact all of these doors have red emergency buttons 

but why? 

you back away immediately and of course you end up backing up right into another door

you turn around quickly

now this

this is interesting

this isn’t just one door

these are double doors

very sleek looking double doors

they’re plain black and the silver handles wink at you underneath the light

and then you notice the metal panel plastered on the front of the door

‘ceo!yoongi x y/n’

.,,,.WHO IS YOONGI

you scratch the top of your head in confusion

man

you must really be having a good time if you can’t even remember all the people you’ve hooked up with

go girl!!!!

okay

who lives next to ceo yoongi let’s see

“demon yoongi.” you mutter to yourself and raise a brow  

this one is interesting

it doesn’t even look like a door

it looks like a black hole and you’re already sweating due to the heat that’s just radiating off of it

when you lean in closer you can hear a hundred voices whispering gibberish to you

oh hELL no

you back away immediately

may the power of christ compel that dOOR

you turn around

oOH this one looks cool

it has like a handprint and an eyeball scan kinda thing instead of a doorknob

omg and that one

is that door is made out of water????

you rush over to take a closer look and you dip a finger into the water

you have to squint to read this sign because the letters are formed from bubbles

“mermaid… jimin and y/n.”

your finger starts to tingle and you yank it out immediately

woAH

you could just dive right in

but also you’re not a good swimmer so maybe don’t do that

and that one over there kinda looks like a bookshelf instead of a door

there’s a basketball hoop hammered onto that one

there’s a life ring hanging on the one next to it

a pair of drumsticks

a tattoo gun

you spend the next half an hour or so continuing to walk down this hallway exploring the fronts of all these doors

a pair of boxing gloves - ‘boxer!jimin x y/n’

a pair of ballet shoes with a raggedy looking bandana wrapped around it - ‘hiphopdancer!hoseok x ballerina!y/n’

damn

a ballerina?????

niCE

you have two left feet so becoming a sophisticated ballerina sounds goOd to you

this one looks like a chalkboard - ‘kindergartenteacher!taehyung x singlemom!y/n’

omg

u have a kid

,..,but why are you single

who’s the asshole that left u

you’re sure this taehyung character is nice tho

this door has nuts and bolts hammered all over it - ‘mechanic!yoongi x y/n’

there’s a croWN hanging from this one - ‘prince!taehyung x y/n’

this door is literally made out of sponge cake and you wanna take a bite - ‘baker!jin x y/n’

this one has vanity lights all over it - ‘model!jungkook x y/n’

and thiS one kinda looks like the chalkboard one except instead of the alphabet written all over it there are just equations upon equations upon equations - ‘professor!namjoon x y/n’

and then it finally (finally) hits you

alternative universes

you studied the theory of alternate universes very briefly in a class that you took during your first year of university but you didn’t actually think… they existed

you’re so preoccupied with your own thoughts you don’t even realise that you’ve reached the end of the hallway

there’s one door left

you approach it and narrow your eyes at the plaque on the front

“jungshookz headquarters… cee pd’s office.”

…the hell is a jungshookz

sounds like a disease

you perk up when you suddenly hear voices on the other end of the door and you lean in to press your ear against the door

“here’s what i’m thinking. i’ll just keep posting drabbles until the next big fic is ready! everyone loves drabbles! that waiter!jungkook one from christmas is stiLL a hit. wha- no, as a matter of fact, i haven’t decided what the next big fic is. what do you mean i can’t work on two at once?! character asks?? i haven’t posted a biG fic obviously i haven’t gotten any character asks as of late-”

oh my god

another human being

well you gotta get in there

you reach down for the doorknob and-

why doesn’t this door have a doorknob

you look back up and you’re about to start banging on the-

wait whAT

WHERE DID THE DOOR GO

NO

WHERE DID IT GO

noW you’re just standing in the middle of an endLESS looking corridor agAIN

“nO nonononono wait wait wait-“

“y/n?” you whip around at the sudden introduction of a nEW voice “what are you doing out of bed? it’s 2 in the morning and the bed is coLd without you��”

okay

first things first

kudos to you

because this boy is very attractive

he has soft blonde hair and pillowy lips and his voice is oddly very soothing

but also

WHO IS THIS BITCH

“i…” you take a step back when he starts walking towards you “you…”

“i…?” he smirks and tilts his head “what’s the matter with you? c’mere silly, come back to bed.” he holds his hand out for you to take and your eyes flicker down to look at it

“where are we?” you breathe out as you take his hand “who are you?”

the stranger turns around and raises an eyebrow 

“what are you talking about? we’re… in our apartment. i’m… your boyfriend. j-i-m-i-n. jimin!” ‘jimin’ offers you a smile of confusion and reaches over to pinch your nose “we gotta get you to bed earlier, y/n. the lack of sleep is making you a little crazy.” 

he starts dragging you down the hallway to the door that’s made out of water 

he’s pulling you along like he’s on a mission and you start to panic because where the heLL are you going 

“hold on you can’t just takE me-” 

“you’re being crazy, y/n. want me to sing you to sleep?” 

“no i don’t want you to sing me to sleep you freAK-” 

you smack your fist against the angry red button next to a random door in your moment of panic 

“nO-” jimin gasps and moves to stop you but it’s too late 

suddenly EVERY SINGLE DOOR swinGS open and an alarm starts blaring 

and you are very much no longer alone

people start walking out of their respective rooms 

they’re all looking at each other weird 

and then it hits you all at once

you recognise every single one of these people

that’s your husband

and that’s your boyfriend who was a mermaid and turned human for you

and that’s your boyfriend who’s a literal android (technology is wild)

and that’s your boyfriend who kept messing up your coffee order

and that’s your daughter

and that’s your othEr daughter who’s slightly older

and that’s your boyfriend who helped you study for your philosophy exam that you passed with flying colours

and that one over there gave you your first tattoo

lifeguard!kook raises a brow at firefighter!kook 

“nice hardhat, loser.” he snorts and knocks his knuckles against firefighter!kook’s helmet

“nice tiny shorts, freak.” 

ceo!yoongi and demon!yoongi look at each other weird

ceo!yoongi immediately shields hwayoung away from demon!yoongi

“c’mon, man. do i look like i wanna hurt a fucking baby?”

librarian!namjoon and namjoon from the android!yoongiverse exchange glances 

“i like your glasses.” 

“mm. i like yours too.” 

meanwhile a couple of the jungkooks are all mimicking each other in the back 

jungkook from the basketball!yoongiverse raises a hand and at the same time mermaid/human!jungkook raises a hand too 

“woah.” they both marvel simultaneously at each other 

a couple other characters are talking to each other

“did you get a whole fic yet?” 

“nah man. she’s still ‘working’ on mine. hasn’t touched it in weeks.” 

“damn. same here!” 

“she wrote a sentence for me and moved onto your fic immediately” 

“don’t be mad at me for that!!” 

suddenly ceo!yoongi pushes through the crowd to get to you 

“who are you people?? get the hell away from my wife. y/n, c’mon, take my hand.” ceo!yoongi has hwayoung cradled in his arm and he reaches out for you with an expectant stare

you look over at his minty-haired counterpart and he wiggles his brows “or you could come with me and we can pick up from where we left off…”  

“oR you can come with me and show me that cheerleading routine you’ve been working so hard on!”

“she’s coming with me!!!”

“she’s coming with US because i’m the godparent of her chiLD and that means she loves our universe the most-“

“mommy, come home with me!! we’re supposed to go out for hot chocolate now-“

“stop!” you scream out but your voice can barely be heard over the absolute sEA of voices

“she literally biRTHED MY CHILD-“

“y/n likes splashing around with us though!! she-”

“i gave up a MERMAID taIL TO BE WITH HER she’s coming with mE-“

“stop it!!!”  

“i put out so many fires for her!!!!!! her-”

“uH there’s no way i’m losing y/n to you people do you know how many heart shaped sandwiches i had to make for her-“

the voices are piling up and getting louder and louder and louder and-

“sTOP IT!”

you shoot straIGHT up from your desk with a gasp and press a hand against your chest as you pant heavily

you’re covered with a sheen layer of sweat and you lean back against your chair as you begin to calm down

you’re… back in your bedroom

sitting at your desk

your textbook is still where you left it

your laptop is still where you left it

you must’ve like

fallen asleep or something while writing your paper

jesus

what kind of a dream was that

you look down at your laptop screen expecting to see your google doc but instead

you’re… on the ask page of some blog

‘GOT A QUESTION FOR ME OR A CHARACTER? ASK AWAY!’

the cursor blinks back at you as you stare at the screen

…do you have a question?

help me help you make your wishes come tru (aka send me a request)

masterlist

#requested drabbles #bts #bts fics #bts fic recs #bts fluff #bts fluff recs #bts cute #yoongi #jungkook #jimin #namjoon #hoseok #j hope #suga #taehyung #v #seokjin #yoongi fics #jungkook fics #jimin fics #namjoon fics #hoseok fics #taehyung fics #seokjin fics #yoongi fic recs #jungkook fic recs #namjoon fic recs #jimin fic recs #hoseok fic recs #taehyung fic recs

[bensboynton]

Good Enough b.h; Part 4

hey hey hello!! sorry this took so long i’ve just been working on a lot of requests recently. 

let me know what you think happens next!!!!!

word count: 3.4k

warnings: swearing as always, angsty, unedited, mentions of cheating, mentions of self-esteem issues, drunkenness, lots of mentions of alcohol

recap

“So it’s settled!” Lucy spoke giddily, clapping her hands in excitement, “Girls night!”

You couldn’t help but feel the same giddiness, after all, it was practically radiating off her. Tonight would be good! A nice, calm night in with your favorite girl in the world and nothing could mess that up.

Or so you thought.

You were in a slump.

It’s to be expected for you to be upset after a bad breakup, but you felt like pure, unadulterated dog shit every single second of your life. The only things that motivated you to get out of bed was filming, your cast-mates, and Lucy.

Ever since that one day at lunch, you and Lucy have been having at least one girl’s night a week, but usually it’s more than that.

And by “girls night” you mean playing a game where you drink as much alcohol as you can in a before you black out. Because as bad as it is, alcohol helps ease the sharp ache in your chest.

The sharp ache that shouldn’t even be there in the first place. Because he hurt you and made you upset more times than you could possibly count, you should be glad he was gone. But you weren’t. He should be the one that was hurting. But he wasn’t.

It probably isn’t helpful seeing all the pictures of him with new girls and people on instagram tagging you in pictures of the two of you together. It hurts to breathe, sometimes.

It’s crazy how you can pour you life and soul into someone for two years, and have it all go away in a second. Now he’s gone and he moved on, and you’re just… stuck.

And the worst part is you can’t help but blame yourself! You always blame how you dress, or act, or talk. And you just turn all the pain on yourself because you’re too in love with the person who actually hurt you to blame them. You’ll just lie in your bed all night, replaying everything in your head and thinking about just how bad you fucked up.

When Y/BF/N left, you had spent days being mad at yourself for overreacting. You had let yourself become a shell and allow yourself to believe you deserved it. And you still believed that, but you wouldn’t tell anyone about it.

But nonetheless, your friendship with Lucy was prospering due to the excessive amount of alcohol you now drink together, and you had these girl nights down to muscle memory. It was a lot of fun, a good way to unwind after a long day. And today was definitely one of the longest day of your life.

You got barely any sleep and had a 10 hour filming day. You were over everything. Especially people. You just wanted to cozy up in your bed with some wine and shitty snacks.

You’ve slept more in the past few weeks then you had in most of your life. You were emotionally tired, and you tried to make up for it for going to bed early and sleeping in late. But you were just… not present.

It’s been a few weeks since the breakup, and you’ve been trying to put up a front to get people to stop worrying, responding “I’m okay, I promise” when someone asks. You weren’t not okay, but you weren’t perfect either.

You felt like you could obliterate a tank physically, but mentally, one wrong word and you’d be sent headfirst into a painful nervous breakdown. And the fact that you were the reason that Rami had to redo the same take twenty seven times today. Twenty seven!

You were so out of it, you couldn’t remember your line or you’d literally forget you were filming halfway through. He was frustrated but he’s too nice to slap the shit out of you and tell you to get it together, like he should’ve done.

You had immediately collapsed on your bed as soon as you wrapped for the day, not even saying bye to the other guys. You took a thirty minute nap before you were awoken by your phone ringing rather loudly right in your ear. She must’ve recieved your text about how shitty your day was.

“Do you want me to bring rosé, white, or red?” Lucy asked enthusiastically into the phone, and before you said anything, she answered her own question. “Actually, I’ll bring all three. Plus the bottle of Bacardi I have leftover from my birthday. I’ll see you in 10. Hang in there babe. Mwah.”

Lucy hung up the phone, and you threw it back down onto the covers while leaning back against the headboard of the bed in your trailer. You already had a headache and you hadn’t had a drip of alcohol today, and your neck was slightly stiff due to the uncomfortable angle it was at while you had taken a nap.

Your mind drifted to filming, before your heart dipped lower in your chest as you suddenly seemed to remember the existence of Ben.

Ben.

And speak of the devil, a notification pops up on your phone screen. “benhardy just posted a photo.”

You had barely seen Ben all day, much less talked to him, and you weren’t really sure where you two stood. You loved being around him and spending time with him, but you were stuck. Literally. You had no idea what to do, or say, and Ben is really annoyingly good at sending mixed signals. He’s impossible to read.

The picture he posted was an old photo from a magazine cover shoot he did the year before. It was in black and white, and made your heart do a flip. You groaned at the effect that he had on you just by posting a dumb picture.

You had gone out to get coffee with him a few times since the incident, been on dinner duty with him (dinner duty is a term coined by Joe; it’s when two people are in charge of picking up the food the cast had ordered that night), but lately, you’ve both been oddly silent to each other.

You found yourself feeling normal when you were with Ben. The emptiness went away, it was like Ben filled your chest with a chocolatey warmth and that scared you. Because you didn’t want history to repeat itself.

You had been through enough pain and breakups to last you your entire life, you were sure of it. You had joked with Lucy that you’d adopt a baby and build a cottage in the forest and just become entirely self-sufficient. It was like a little fantasy of yours. Not having to rely on anything(or anyone) to live.

You weren’t sure if you wanted to pursue anything with Ben, or if he even felt anything other than friendship towards you. And you were so confused. You thought about texting him, before deciding against it and busying yourself with preparing for your girls night with Lucy.

For someone who you don’t see a lot during the day, you sure think about Ben a ton. And by “a ton” you mean all the damn time. It was frustrating, to say the least. You were thinking of him right fucking now!

Getting coffee? You’re thinking of Ben. Shooting a scene? Thinking of Ben. Writing songs? Thinking of Ben. Singing? You guessed it, thinking of Ben! It made you want to put your headphones in and play a song as loud as you could to try and push him out of your brain.

After the breakup, you couldn’t write a word for any song onto paper. But when you’re with Ben? You could write an entire concept album on the exact shade of green that his eyes were. And that annoyed you, but also confused you as to what exactly you were feeling.

You threw a package of pizza rolls into the microwave, grabbing some nail polish and face masks out of your small storage compartment near your bed. You doubted that you and Lucy would actually be sober long enough to use them, but it was worth a try.

Before you knew it, an enthusiastic knock was heard at the door, and it made your heart soar. You opened up to see your platinum-blonde haired best friend with a huge duffle bag full of clothes, alcohol, movies, and snacks. She was wearing a matching silk light pink pajama set, the exact same as yours, except blue. “Ready to get wasted babe?”

You laughed at Lucy’s comment and pulled her into a tight hug before ushering her into the trailer, locking the door behind you. She immediately started unpacking her bags and grabbed two glasses from the top cabinet and poured you both a completely full glass of wine.

You grabbed the pizza rolls and your wine glass and migrated over to your bed, setting the rolls down after downing three large gulps of wine. You and Lucy just made small talk about your day’s, Lucy asking you about filming that day.

“Okay, I want to make a toast.” Lucy murmured, clearing her throat dramatically before holding up her glass.

“To girls nights, and to… I don’t know, actually,” Lucy paused and bit her lip, “to really shitty wine, I guess.”

“Amen,” you agreed, lightly tapping Lucy’s glass with yours before downing another large portion of the wine.

--

When Lucy said you two were getting wasted, she wasn’t kidding. You had both finished two bottles of wines, and done a few shots of the old vodka Lucy had brought from home.

And you couldn’t see straight.

The room was slightly tilted and spinning, and your eyes felt incredibly heavy. You tried to go and grab a bag of snacks from the counter, but you almost fell over so you decided to stay seated on your bed. You and Lucy were starting to spew nonsense that made zero sense, but had you both crying in laughter.

You had also prank called Joe, but you failed miserably. He actually found your drunkenness quite humorous. You also took an instagram picture of you two drinking a glass of wine, and you captioned it “girlk nighy.” (You were a shit speller when you were sober, so being drunk really didn’t help)

The comments were quickly taken over with people laughing about your drunken state, and also telling you to be safe. Joe and Gwil both commented asking why they weren’t invited to the party, and right before you shut your phone off, you got another notification.

Ben liked the photo, but didn’t comment. It made your stomach flip, although that definitely could’ve been the alcohol. You wanted to scream and put your head through the wall, because someone liking your stupid instagram post shouldn’t make you feel like you’re gonna throw up.

Lucy decided that she wanted to watch Pretty Woman, so she put it on and dimmed the lights in the trailer, getting lost in the story. You had started crying almost as soon as Vivian met Edward, because you knew the rest of the story.

And you wished you had someone like that to love.

Lucy had put a video of you in tears on her instagram story, tagging you before returning to the movie. About halfway through, though, you both seemed to have passed out. The last thing you remember is a conversation between Edward Lewis and Vivian Ward lulling you to sleep.

--

You woke up a few hours later, the TV had turned itself off and you were still drunk.

Like, really, really drunk.

And your thoughts were irrational, but all you could think about was Ben. Lucy was laying next to you in your bed, dead asleep, but you just wished it was Ben who was there next to you, just like he did after the breakup. You wanted nothing more than to cuddle up in his arms and go to sleep. But you couldn’t.

You searched through your bed, trying to find your phone. After finally finding it hidden, Lucy’s body unfortunately laying on top of it, you opened the calling app and hesitated. Should you call Ben? You eventually decided that you didn’t have anyone else to talk to, so you did.

You dialed Ben’s number and crossed your fingers in front of you like a first grader, hoping that he’d still be awake at 4 am.

“At the tone, please record your message. If you are finished recording, please hang up or-”

You hung up the phone quickly, swearing under your breath. You dialed the phone number in again, listening to it’s painfully slow ringing. The anticipation was building up so much in your chest you could’ve burst.

“Y/N? Hello? Are you okay?” you heard a tired, yet confused British voice say. All the air in your lungs disappeared for a moment.

“Bennie!” you slurred, rolling over in bed and giggling like a schoolgirl at the sound of his voice. Ben chuckled tiredly at the nickname, clearly confused about what was going on.

“Are you okay?” Ben asked again. You almost said yes, as saying you were fine had become a habit of yours.

“Actually… I’m not really? I don’t even know what I’m saying right now.” Your words were a jumbled mess, and you heard Ben take a sharp inhale on the other end of the line.

“I hope you’re done drinking now?” You nodded quickly. Forgetting that he couldn’t see you, you then told him that yes, the alcohol was put away.

“I’ve just been thinking. A lot. Like, a lot.” You started to ramble, eliciting a tired chuckle from the blonde boy.

“Yes, that happens to be a common thing that humans do.” You wanted to punch him in the throat for being so sarcastic, yet smooth even at four in the fucking morning.  

You could already tell you were going to regret saying anything to him, but your sober thoughts turned into drunk words way too fast and next thing you knew, you were spilling your heart out to Ben on the phone.

“You know? I’ve been fucked over a lot! A ton. So much. So so much,” you hiccuped lightly as you twisted a strand of hair around your finger, “and they all start and end the same way. I fall in love, he says he loves me, blah blah blah, we have sex in a car once or twice, a few months pass, and bam, he leaves me. And it’s always me who gets hurt. Why is it always me? What did I ever do to deserve that?”

Ben was eerily silent on the other end of the line, but to stop an awkward silence, you kept going.

“And everyone keeps asking me if I’m doing okay, if they need to go ‘beat him up for me’ and I always say I’m okay. Everytime. And I’m sick of it! I’m sick of pretending that he didn’t rip my heart out of my chest. Because he did, and I can’t sleep because every time I close my eyes I see him! And I can’t eat because it reminds me of all the times we’d go out to eat at 3am because we were bored. And I can’t drive because it reminds me of all the road trips we used to take to Venice to visit his cousin.”

There were tears streaming down your face, your words beginning to get jumbled. And you knew what was about to happen, but you didn’t have the mental capacity or willpower to try and stop it.

“And now, I see you every day and I think about that day you carried me back to my trailer, or when you held me so tight you were the only thing keeping me from shattering into a thousand pieces. And then we go out to pick up dinner for the band, or you smile at me or you laugh at something I said and I feel my heart soar. And I can forget about him. When I talk to you, the pain goes away for a second. Suddenly, he’s not at the forefront of my mind. You are. And I hate that! I hate dependency. I hate being someone who needs to rely on other people for happiness because I’m a lot to handle! I have so much baggage.”

Your words got caught in your throat for a second between the hollow sobs that were echoing in your trailer.

“I’m a lot easier to deal with when I’m happy. Always have been. And no one wants to deal with me when I’m sad or sick or in a shitty mood. They always leave me. And I hate that I like you so much, I hate that I adore being around you. Because I don’t want you to hurt me the same way he did. ‘Cause there’s definitely something wrong with me! Has to be! Three of my boyfriends have cheated on me. Three. I just wish I knew what I was doing wrong so I could stop. I don’t want to get hurt again.”

Still, silence on the other end of the line. The noiseless environment was so quiet it was loud in your eardrums. You felt like you were going to burst into a fiery, red-hot mess of tears and anger and anxiety. You were about to combust.

“You don’t care. Silly of me to think anyone cares, really,” you paused for a moment, tears silently rolling down your cheeks, “see you around, Bennie.”

You swore you heard him try to say something, but you passed it off as your ears ringing from the massive amounts of poison(wine) running through your veins.

And with that, you ended the call and fell back on your bed, laying your head close to Lucy. And darkness consumed you, pushing you into a sleep so deep you were almost unconscious.

—

“Holy shit,” Lucy groaned loudly, “I’ve never been this hungover in my entire life.”

“You and me both.” You responded glumly. You had vague memories of the night before, but nothing much. The last thing you remember is passing out halfway through Pretty Woman. Your head felt like you had just awoken from a coma, you could barely open your eyes.

And your throat hurt so bad, you could’ve swore you woke up with strep throat.

You drowsily grabbed your phone from it’s spot next to you on the bed, and your eyes opened wide at the notifications on your lock screen.

You had seven missed calls from Ben, and 7 text messages.

ben: can we talk

ben: call me back

ben: answer my calls

ben: y/n

ben: y/n please call me back

ben: hello?

ben: please answer

You closed out of the texts and were about to call him back when an urgent knock rattled through your trailer. You raised an eyebrow at Lucy as you walked over to the door. She shrugged, so you expected to see a PA or something, but to your surprise, a certain blonde British man was on your doorstep.

Ben.

You both made eye contact and, for a few moments, just looked at each other. Ben opened his mouth to speak but no sound came out at first. He looked distressed, and Ben was never distressed. The look on his face was unsettling. “The call… did you mean it?” he asked suddenly. You wracked your brain for a few moments, trying to figure out what he meant by “the call.”

You raised an eyebrow in confusion. “What call?” you wondered aloud.

“T-The call. You called me last night. Did you mean it?” Ben seemed panicky, his eyes desperately searching yours for something. Jesus, did you do this to him?

What the fuck did you say on that phone call?

“I’m sorry Ben. I don’t remember I was so drunk but…” you trailed off, biting your lip gently, “I probably didn’t mean it. Whatever I said. I’m an emotional drunk.”

Ben’s eyes dropped to his shoes and suddenly the cool air around you seemed to turn stale.

“What did I say? Was I mean? I’m sorry I just… don’t remember.” You were speaking to him with a slight desperation in your voice.You hoped you hadn’t hurt him.

“You don’t know what you said?” Ben asked in slight disbelief. You shook your head side-to-side, causing Ben to just shake his head and kick his shoe into the step he was standing below on your doorstep.

“Never mind. See you around.” He spoke quickly, all emotion and warmth leaving his voice immediately. And with that, he swiftly left you standing on your own doorstep, confused and slightly worried. You could’ve sworn you heard his voice crack in sadness, but you couldn’t be too sure.

Like you said, you’re always fucking things up.

taglist(strike through means tag won’t work): @sweetheartben​ @benhardyseyes @ziggyspurplehaze @mrsmazzello @orchideax @ellalisaa @valeriecarolinaw @rexorangecouny @hardzzellos

if you want to be added to the taglist, send me an ask and i’ll add you! <3

#ben hardy #ben hardy headcanon #ben hardy fic #ben hardy x reader #ben hardy x you #queen #borhap #borhap cast #borhap boys #borhap guys #borhap blurb #bohemian rhapsody #bohemian rhapsody cast #bohemian rhapsody movie #ben hardy fanfic #ben hardy fanfiction #ben hardy blurb #ben hardy oneshot

[gruviafan-forever]

MY BESTFRIEND'S SISTER

PART - I (AU Storyline)

Natsu, Gray and Erza are childhood friends who studied in the same school from kindergarten until now in high school.

They love to hang out with one another during their weekends along with their respective love interests who also studies in the same school and class.

This week, it was Natsu's turn to host the sleepover party. So Gray along with Lucy, Natsu's girlfriend who happen to his neighbour's were on their way to Natsu's house.

"So Gray, why do you happen to be single? What's wrong with you? You are handsome, smart and composed. Moreover, you have huge fangirl army in the school who confess their love to you every day. Then why are you still single?"

Lucy asked her confusion to him clear out her mind and to make conversation while on their way to her bf's house.

"Oh Lucy leave that topic. I'm not interested in anyone right now. All are obsessive freaks.

   Just think I'm waiting for a girl who makes me go crazy for her. She should be someone who is unique."

Gray said as he lifted his arms to interlock it behind his head.

Lucy who has know him for 5 years now looked in amused as this was the first time he has opened up his feelings regarding love matter.

"So if you find a girl according to your interest then will you date her?" She asked to clarify her lingering doubt.

Gray raised his eyebrow, " Of course, I will but before that I need to …..woh!!!"

Gray fell flat on the footpath and Lucy stopped to look at him. It looks like someone has bumped from behind.

When Gray lifted his head, he saw a girl with unique hair colour, blue, was the one who fell on him.

"Ahh!! It hurts." She wimpered in pain.

"Hey girl, are you okay?" Lucy bent down to take a good look at the girl to know whether she was hurt or not.

The blunette lifted her head and smiled like a goofy. "I'm okay. Thank you, Miss."

She thanked the blonde in a surprised tone and completely forgetting the boy underneath her.

"If you have done talking, can you get up?" Gray told her. "Sorry my bad, wait a sec, mister." She got up and dusted her frock.

Gray got up soon and dusted his t-shirt and jeans. Then he took a good look at her face.

For a minute, Gray was stunned as if his world stopped revolving.

For his eyes, the blunette looked gorgeous and beautiful. His heart skipped a beat when he saw her sparkling blue eyes which made him mesmerized.

Lucy who saw her friend's reaction nudged him with her elbow on his arm.

"Juvia is really sorry for bumping you from behind. She didn't see the person in front of her as she was looking behind the chasing dog. Juvia is sorry, mister."

The blunette bowed to apologise for her mistake.

Gray found her voice so sweet and soothing. And he found her way of speaking was also unique, she spoke in third person. Basically, she was unique yet beautiful.

"It's okay Juvia, this mister doesn't seems to mind actually. Let it be, sorry we are in hurry, bye." Lucy convinced the blunette.

"Okay if you say so Miss. But Juvia feels bad though. Bye Miss and mister." She bowed and sent them off.

As Lucy pulled Gray along with her, he seems to lost in his thoughts and yelling was the only way to snap him out.

"GRAY, SNAP OUT OF IT. Geez, you looked like a pervert while you kept staring at her."

"Oh Lucy, it's nothing. Just stop it, I was just lost in her beauty that's all. You know we should never hesitate to appreciate any form of beauty."

Gray blushed and fondly thought about the blunette.

Lucy's jaws hit the ground to see her friend being suddenly romantic and fawning over a stranger.

"Gray, that's enough. She is a stranger. Don't forget that.." She began to walk.

"Chill Lucy, I was just kidding. I know she is a random person whom I met on the road. I won't fall for someone this easily hahahaha…." Gray chuckled to ease the atmosphere.

As they reached Natsu's house, his best friend opened the door and welcomed them. Lucy hugged her boyfriend who responded back.

"Man, that's gross. Let me in at least I don't have to see these."

Gray pushed Natsu and went inside to the living room where he saw his other friends and their respective love interest.

"Hi Gray" Both Erza and Jellal, her boyfriend said in unison.

"Hi Stripper" Gray's classmate named Gajeel who became their friend during the first year of high school.

"Hi Gray" Levy, Lucy's best friend and Gajeel's girlfriend greeted him.

Just then, Natsu and Lucy entered the living room hand in hand. Gray felt himself like a third wheel in between these couples.

Suddenly Natsu's mobile rings, "Hello Mom, okay….okay l understand. She...she didn't come still. I sent her to buy something for the sleepover party.

  Don't yell at me, geez. Just wait for 10 minutes, if she doesn't come back, I will go and look for her… oh mom, please don't yell. Geez…."

Natsu cut the call and scratched his head. "Who were you referring to as she?" Gajeel asked him.

"Oh right, my mom was yelling at me for sending my sister away for  supermarket. She went before you guys, came and still now didn't come back." Natsu looked worried and tried calling her.

Gray looked shocked which didn't go unnoticed by Erza, "What's with the look? Don't tell me you forgot he has a sister."

"Hey I never knew, he had one. Why didn't you introduce me to her?"

He asked in a surprised tone which made everyone to lift their eyebrow.

Natsu being over-protective brother huffed in response, "Why should I introduce a stripper, pervert like you to my innocent sister? She is so pure and delicate." Natsu became dramatic.

"Shut up, I was just curious who could be an ash for brain's sister. If she is your sister, I can see she must be just like you hot-head and destructive in nature.

   I would never take interest in your sister. So just quit this drama." Gray responded by glaring at him.

"Seriously Natsu, you didn't even say to me." Lucy pouted. Natsu hugged her, "No Luce, whenever you came home, she wasn't present at the home. Today I will introduce her to all of you. She is a year younger than us."

Gray wondered who could be Natsu's sister. He looked around the room to see any photos but never found one.

Just then the door bell rang, Natsu went to attend the door. As I was drinking the juice which was kept on the table.

Natsu entered, I didn't look up as I knew his sister would have come along with him.

"So guys, she is my sister, Juvia." Gray's eyes widened and choked his drink.

"Hi nice meeting you all. Juvia's name is Juvia." She shot a bright smile.

Gray suddenly got up from his seat and pointed his finger on the blunette.

"Flame-breath, are you sure? She is your sister." Just by looking at her, Gray began to blush.

Natsu put his arm around Juvia's shoulder protectively and back her off.

"Yeah, she is my own sister. Now do you have a problem with that?" Natsu asked him.

"Man, why does my crush happens to be my best friend's sister. It's going to be a long sleepover party." Gray sat down and thought to himself.

Lucy knew what Gray was thinking in his mind and chuckled at his funny expressions.

She was waiting for all the events which will unfold tonight.

#gray x juvia #ft gray #gruvia #juvia #ft juvia #juvia loxar #fairy tail juvia #gray fullbuster #gray

[mrsevans1328]

#10: “Are you upset with me?” //Shawn Mendes Fic

Request: @cave2687

Summary: Reader and Shawn have been having some issues lately. Shawn has been very distant with Reader. Will they make up and stay together? Or is this the beginning of the end for them?

**Note: Hey everyone, I’m sorry it took me so long to get this posted. I’ve been having a rough time lately, and honestly haven’t been in the mood to do pretty much anything. But I promised you guys I would get these written, so I’m trying to push through. Also, this story-line hits close to home for me, so it was really difficult to write certain parts of this. I hope you enjoy! Love you all xxx

Word count: 4,167

Prompt Masterlst

“I Want you close to me, I want you close, I want you closer.

But when you’re here with me, it’s hard to tell just what you’re after.

You say you want all of me today,

But tomorrow’s not the same. My feelings never change.

What do you want from me? What do you want, huh?

I need to know, if this is mutual,

Before I go, and get way too involved.

I want you bad, can you reciprocate?

No I don’t want to have to leave, but half of you is not enough for me.

This inconsistency, what does it mean? You have me questioning,

The way you act and take it back. Do I mean anything?

Just tell me honestly.

You say, you want all of me today,

But tomorrow’s not the same. My feelings never change.

What do you want from me? What do you want, huh?

I need to know, if this is mutual,

Before i go, and get way too involved.

I want you bad, can you reciprocate?

No I don’t want to have to leave, but half of you is not enough for me.

Are you playing me? Is this a game?

When you show up late, say love at 2 am.

Then you tell me you can’t stay. Oh, yeah

What do you want from me?

Baby, oh I need to know, if this is mutual,

Before I go, and get too involved.

I want you bad baby, can you reciprocate?

No I don’t want to have to leave, but half of you is not enough for me.”

The last chord fades in the room, your fingers still gripping the neck of your guitar while you wait nervously to hear y/bf/n’s reaction to the song you just wrote. As soon as you finished it, you called her and asked to sing it for her, knowing she will give you the honest truth.

“What’s it called, y/n?” she asks through the other line, you phone sitting next to the sheet music you have spread all over the bed in front of you.

You chew on the corner of your lip in thought, “I haven’t decided 100 percent yet, but I’m liking the name Mutual.”

“Don’t take this the wrong way, but this song is honestly one of the best you’ve written. I just hate that you are going through this in order to have the inspiration for it.” Y/bf/n says after a few minutes of silence.

You sigh, the thought of Shawn’s recent behavior causing you to have major anxiety. He’s been very distant with you. Coming home late, going right to sleep and leaving before you wake up in the morning. You try to talk to him, but he never seems to be interested in conversation, so you gave up trying. You’d spend many nights awake, unable to sleep, trying to figure out why he’s acting like this. Making yourself sick to your stomach with thoughts like “Maybe he doesn’t love me anymore, and doesn’t want to tell me”, or “Maybe he’s cheating on me, maybe he found someone better than me.” Even just thinking of the possibilities makes your eyes water and throat clog up.

The front door closing shut, breaking you from your little pity party. Shawn’s home early, ish. It’s almost midnight, but he normally hasn’t been getting home until around 2 am. Maybe even later.

Scrambling to clean up the scattered papers on the bed before Shawn reaches the bedroom, “Hey, he just got home. I’ll talk to you tomorrow, yeah?” Y/bf/n answers with a quick “Sure,” before you say bye and hang up.

You just manage to get the papers shoved under the bed and sit back on the bed with the guitar on your lap when the bedroom door opens, Shawn walking in. You try to act casual, like you have been sitting there just fiddling with your favorite guitar, a cherry red acoustic, plucking random chords.

“Still practicing?” It’s been forever since you’ve heard that raspy voice that when he asked you that question, you didn’t know how to react, shock coursing through you. When you and Shawn first met, you were a back-up dancer for Taylor Swift on her tour. You two hit it off pretty easily, being only a few months apart from each other in age. Shawn’s tour manager wanted Shawn to do more dancing in his opening performances for Taylor, but Shawn couldn’t dance to save his life. So you agreed to teach him to dance for his next tour, if he agreed to teach you how to play guitar. One thing led to another, and now you have been together for 2 years. Your anniversary is tomorrow, or rather today since it’s past midnight at this point.

Finally finding your voice, you manage to stutter out a reply of, “Oh.. uh, ye-yeah. Got n-nothing better to d-do.” Frowning at your own actions, you scold yourself for stuttering. You only stutter when you speak to people you aren’t comfortable around or don’t know that well, or when your anxiety is high. He’s your boyfriend, he shouldn’t feel like a stranger.

Peeking at Shawn, you notice his body stiffen at your stuttered words, taking mental note of the small crinkles between his brows before they vanish, as if they were never there to begin with. After a few moments, he continues to change clothes, acting like nothing just happened. It hurt to think that he didn’t care enough to ask what was wrong.

You feel the back of your eyes burn with tears, but before you can let them spill, you stand and put the guitar back on the rack hanging from the wall of the room. “H-How’s the album c-coming along?” You ask, trying to make small talk, the tension in the air suffocating you.

“Huh?” Shawn raises an eyebrow before realization hitting him, “Oh, the new album. Um, its fine.” Shawn’s sentences are choppy, cut short and dry. The lack of emotion in his voice causing your fragile heart to squeeze in your chest. You take that as your que to stop talking, his disinterest in the conversation obvious.

“I- uh, I’m gonna go watch a movie or something in the living room. That way I-I’m not bothering you while you sleep..” Your voice trails off at the end, not knowing what to do or say anymore. You see him sink onto the bed, giving you a small grunt in reply. As you’re walking out the door, you turn the light off for him and mumble under your breath, “Happy anniversary.” a single tear slipping down your cheek. You weren’t expecting him to reply, even if he could hear you, so you don’t bother to stick around waiting for one.

“Such a great start to what is supposed to be a happy day,” you think to yourself while you wrap your favorite blanket around yourself, silently crying yourself to sleep with y/f/m playing softly in the background.

~Shawn’s POV~

I woke up to my alarm at 5 am, a big day ahead of me. I sit up in bed and look over to see y/n’s side still made, no sign of her anywhere. I frown, wondering why she didn’t come to bed last night after her movie. Getting dressed quickly, i make my way to the living room, finding her curled up on the couch in her favorite blanket, the main menu of y/f/m rolling on repeat on the tv. She must have fallen asleep during the movie last night. Walking over to where she’s laying, I pick up the remove and turn the tv off before turning to y/n to carry her to bed where she will be more comfortable. As I pick her up in my arms bridal style, I notice her eyes are slightly puffy, and her cheeks look flushed. Upon further inspection of her face while I take her back upstairs to our room, I see the bags under her eyes and the smeared makeup. Was she crying? Is that why her makeup is smeared? From wiping under her eyes? That would explain her puffy eyes and slightly red cheeks. Why was she crying?

I set her down softly on her side of the bed, tucking her under the covers and sitting on the edge of the bed gently, careful not to wake her. Moving her hair from her face, I lean down to kiss her forehead. As I sit back up straight, I see a corner of a paper peeking out from under the bed. My curiosity getting the better of me, I bend down and pull the paper out fully to see it’s not just paper, it’s sheet music. Skimming over the music written in y/n’s easily identifiable handwriting, it seems to be only part of a piece. Kneeling down next to the bed, my hand reaches into the dark space, searching for more sheets. I pull out everything I can find and lean my back against the side of the bed, checking to make sure y/n is still asleep before shuffling the papers around on the floor in front of me like pieces to a puzzle, trying to put the unnumbered pages in the correct order according to the lyrics.

Once I have them all in, what I’m assuming is the correct order, my heart breaks while reading through it. Did she really feel this way? Is that why she was crying last night? Because she thought I didn’t love her anymore? My stomach sank and the thought of her crying herself to sleep over me. How could I not have noticed? How long has she felt like this? So many thoughts were running through my mind at once, causing my head and heart to ache at the same time. I can’t believe I hadn’t noticed, I’ve been so busy the last month trying to get things prepared for today that I’ve made her feel unloved.

With a new determination fueling me, I jump to my feet after putting the sheet music back where I found it. Leaning down to kiss y/n’s forehead one more time, I whisper to her sleeping form. “I’m so sorry babygirl. I’m going to make this up to you, I promise.”

Checking my phone, I mentally curse at myself for losing track of time. I have 15 minutes to get to the dance studio on the other side of town. I rush out the door as quietly as I can, dialing y/bf/n as I pull out of the driveway, hearing her pick up on the third ring.

“Hey, meet me at the dance studio.”

~Y/N’s POV~

You wake up around 8:30 am, your eyes dry and head pounding from crying yourself to sleep. Rolling over, you notice you aren’t on the couch anymore, but in bed with your blanket still wrapped around you. Confused as to how you got here, you sit up. Shrugging, you figured you got up last night to come to bed and don’t remember. You trudge downstairs to take something for your headache and eat something. Popping a bagel in the toaster and pulling out the cream cheese, you hear your phone ringing from the coffee table in the living room. You race over to pick it up before the calls ends, the blanket around your neck flapping behind you like a cape.

“Hello?” Forgetting to check the caller ID in your rush to answer the phone, you had no clue who was calling you this early in the morning.

You hear the unforgettable voice of your best friend on the other line. “Hey, Alex wants to run over the choreography for the music video today. She wants everyone at the studio by 5 for warm ups. She has a few meetings today, which is why it’s so late. I was thinking I could come over at around 12:30, we can go grab lunch, then go shopping to kill time?” Y/bf/n says cheerfully. She has always been more of a morning person than you.

“I don’t know, Y/bf/n. I’m not really feeling like doing anything today. I’ll be at rehearsal, but im not feeling up to shopping.” You chew on your lip, another anxious habit of yours.

“Please, Y/n. We haven’t hung out in a while, I miss you. Plus, shopping will help you feel better. It’s practically therapeutic.” She all but begs, and you can even hear the pout in her voice, knowing she’s giving you the puppy eyes.

You sigh, feeling your resolve slowly fade. That’s all she needs, knowing she’s won and cheering by herself. “I’ll be over in a few hours. Don’t forget to pack your dance bag.” Saying your goodbyes, you hang up and go back to making your breakfast.

~Skip to 12:30~

You hear a car honk twice outside, your signal that y/bf/n is here to pick you up. Grabbing your dance bag, keys, and phone, you walk out the front door, making sure it’s locked behind you before climbing into y/bf/n’s car.

She leans over and gives you a hug, then lets you buckle up as she pulls out and heads towards town. “Have you heard anything from Shawn today?”

You roll your eyes, even on your anniversary, he still acts as if you don’t exist. “He was gone when i woke up this morning, like normal. Haven’t even gotten a text.” The mention of him forgetting your anniversary instantly puts you in a bad mood. “Can we not talk about him while we are out, please? This is supposed to be helping me cheer up, not reminding me why I’m upset to begin with.”

Y/bf/n glances at you out of the corner of her eyes, focusing on the road. “Sure, where do you want to eat?” Already heading towards your favorite fast food place.

“As if you have to ask.” You joke, trying to lighten the mood.

Pulling out of Chick-Fil-A drive through, you have the biggest smile on your face. You love their spicy chicken sandwiches. Who would have thought to put pickles on a chicken sandwich? Only Chick-Fil-A. As y/bf/n drives in the direction of the mall, you dig out her sandwich and fries for her so she can eat and drive at the same time. Digging into your own food, you practically moan as the deliciousness melts in your mouth.

Once the car is parked in the mall parking lot, you two finish up your food before heading inside, throwing your trash out on your way in.

“Where to first?” You ask, stopping in front of the map of the mall they have posted at every entrance. Looking to y/bf/n, you see her grin evilly and instantly get nervous. “Oh no.” You barely make out before you are dragged into the first store you see.

~Skip to 3:45 pm~

“Are we almost done? The studio is on the other side of town and I’d like to have time to stretch before warm ups.” You whine at y/bf/n, tired of shopping already. It’s never been one of your favorite things to do, but you agreed to it because y/bf/n knows how to manipulate you, in a best friend sort of way.

“Just one more store, then we can leave.” She says, pulling you into one last store. This shop had a lot of really nice dresses, shoes, tops, skirts, accessories, etc. Basically anything you need for a formal/semi-formal event, this place will have it. Y/bf/n absolutely loves this place, and even though you aren’t exactly a big fan of shopping, even you had to admit they have a lot of nice dresses.

Deciding you might as well kill time while you wait for y/bf/n to finish her escapade, you walk around, checking out dresses and shoes. Fingering through a rack of cocktail dresses, you come across this black strapless dress. It had a heart shape bust with a lace overlay. A thin silver belt separated the bust from the skirt. The skirt had multiple layers of thin black tool that gave it some volume, the very bottom layer being soft silk against your skin so the tool doesn’t scratch and irritate you.

All in all, the dress is stunning, so you pull it from the rack and run off to find y/bf/n to show her. Finding her by the shoes, as if she can sense you coming, she turns around and sees you holding up the dress, proud of your find.

“OMG, that is gorgeous! You have to try that on!!” You and y/bf/n gush over the dress while you scour the shelves to find shoes to go with it. She manages to find the perfect pair of silver sparkly heels, and you two dash off to the dressing rooms.

As soon as you put the dress on, you fall even more in love with the dress. You walk out to show y/bf/n and her eyes practically fall out of her head. “You are getting it, I don’t care how much it costs.”

“I don’t even have any reason to buy it, it’s not like i’ll be going out on a hot date any time soon.” You remind her, getting upset again.

“You are buying the dress, even if I have to take you on a date myself! Now go change so we can pay and get out of here.” With a playful eye roll, you turn back to the changing rooms and put your other clothes on before heading to check out and leaving.

By the time y/bf/n pulls up to the studio, its 4:30. Both of you jump out of the car and rush inside to get dressed and stretched out before 5. When you walk in, everyone else is already there and either chatting or stretching. You say your hellos and walk into the locker room, changing into your dance clothes, not having to worry about your hair since you put it into two french braids after your shower this morning.

Leaving your bags in your normal lockers, you and y/bf/n walk out to the main studio and start stretching, chatting with some of the other dancers. At 10 minutes before 5, you guys all start running through warm ups. Doing pieces of old routines to get your muscles moving and loose. After a few warm ups, someone suggested running through the routine for the music video before Alex gets there, most likely running late in her last meeting seeing as it was almost 5:15 and she still wasn’t there yet. You all get into your starting positions, waiting for the music to start. Once the music does start, you notice its the wrong song.

You recognize the song as Say You Won’t Let Go by James Arthur (A/N: if you click this link, it should take you to a YouTube video that shows the choreography that I’m referencing. if the link doesn't work. then open YouTube and search “Say You Won't Let Go (Dance Video) - James Arthur | @ besperon Choreography”.) and look around confused. When the other dancers start moving, you instantly notice the choreography, it’s your choreography that you used in your audition for Taylor Swift’s Tour, the one you met Shawn on. Speaking of Shawn, he walks out of the men’s locker room, a headset mic taped to his face, and he’s singing the lyrics while moving to stand with you in the middle of the studio floor, the rest of the dancers moving around you two in time to the song.

By the time he got to the second verse, you had tears in your eyes. He stopped singing, but his voice still filled the room, probably a recording. “Dance with me?” Shawn asked, a smile on his face as the rest of the dancers moved to the walls of the room. ( A/N: She starts dancing with Shawn at the 1:30 mark of the video until the end)

Your body moves on it’s own, the choreography committed to memory from the multiple months you worked on this piece and practiced, you’d probably be able to dance this piece in your sleep. After the choreography was done, Shawn continued to sing the rest of the song, holding you close, both of you with tears in your eyes.

As the song slowly fades, everyone else in the room starts to cheer. “I’m so so so sorry for how I’ve been acting. I wasn’t meaning to make you feel abandoned or unloved. The truth is I love you more than life itself. My absence this last month and a half was because of this. I spent extra hours in the studio, recording my own music, but also working on this song. I would get up at 4 am every day so i could come here and learn the choreography. We both know I’m not the world’s best dancer, which means every chance I got, I was running over the work. I was so focused on making sure this was perfect for today, I guess I neglected the woman this was all for. And I am so sorry, baby.” Shawn was full on crying by the end of his small rant, his hands on your waist. Your heart was swelling, he didn’t forget your anniversary. He put so much effort into making sure today was as special as possible. He learned the choreography to your audition, the audition that landed you a spot on Taylor’s tour. The tour where you two met.

Because of your mental tyrade, you forgot to say anything, tears falling freely down your cheeks. But for the first time in a long time, they were out of happiness, not pain.

Shawn wiped your cheek, the simple motion pulling you from your own thoughts, his own chocolate eyes watching you closely, “Are you upset with me?”

Unable to speak, you pulled him into a deep loving kiss by the back of his neck. When the kiss was finally broke, Shawn had a soft smile on his face, relieved you weren’t mad at him for his behavior.

He reached into his coat pocket, pulling out a small red box. “I know I’ve been a crappy boyfriend to you lately. And I don’t deserve for you to forgive me so easily. But if you allow me, I promise to show you what love feels like. I promise to cherish every moment with you. I promise to never take you for granted. And I promise to one day make you my wife. But only if you promise to do the same. So, what do you say?”

Shawn opens the small box to display the most beautiful promise ring. A thin silver band holding a delicate treble clef, and in the corner a small diamond stone. In complete awe, your y/e/c eyes flick between the man standing before you and the beautiful ring in his hand.

The biggest smile plastered itself to your face and the words, “I promise,” fell from your lips. Shawns lips instantly found yours in a kiss filled with love and passion. He slips the ring on your hand and the room erupts into cheers once more.

“One more, surprise, we are going out for dinner to celebrate not only our anniversary, but also this wonderful moment,” Shawn explains, placing a small kiss to the top of your hand.

“Shawn, I don't have anything to wear. All I have is my dance clothes that smell like body odor now and the clothes i wore here.” You explain just as you see y/bf/n walk into the room, holding your dress and shoes you bought at the mall. “Oh, I hate you both,” You say playfully, giving Shawn one last kiss before running off to the locker rooms with y/bf/n to get ready, suddenly thankful you put your hair in braids earlier so it will be wavey when you undo them. Y/bf/n helps you get ready, making small talk while she does your makeup that she brought with her and explaining that she recorded the whole thing for you. You ask her to send it to you and she agrees. Once you’re fully dressed and ready to go, y/bf/n gives you a hug, and you walk out to see Shawn in a simple tux.

His jaw drops when he sees you. “You look gorgeous, y/n. Ready to go?” He kisses your cheek softly and takes your hand in his, leading you out the door and to his car that you just realized was only a few parking spots away from where you and y/bf/n parked.

“Oh, and by the way, Happy Anniversary baby.” Shawn kisses you one more time, a soft and sweet gesture before opening your door.

~~THE END~~

#shawn #shawn mendes #shawn mendes x reader #shawn mendes fic #shawn mendes prompt #shawn mendes imagine #shawn mendes blurb #shawn mendes one shot #shawn mendes fluff #prompt #prompt list #masterlist #prompt masterlist

[huangels]

you're too entertaining - johnny

request: hey there! may i request a fluff scenario where the female reader, after getting dumped by her bf, gets dragged to a club by her friends and ends up meeting/flirting with johnny (who works there as a DJ)? thank you!

a/n: ive been hella busy lately so scenarios are coming in slow lol and so because i haven’t updated in like two days i made this scenario a bit longer! (B/F/N = your boyfriend’s name, Y/F/N = your friend’s name), it’s mostly fluff so i tried to make the breakup in the beginning as dry and quick as possible :p

summary: After finding out your boyfriend is cheating on you, you’re outraged and need to let off steam. Gladly, your best friend invites you to a newly opened club, where you totally forget about your ex-boyfriend as Johnny is there to entertain you.  

genre: fluff

warnings: none

word count: 3.4k

The phone continues to ring five times before going to voicemail, you sigh for the umpteenth time.

Your boyfriend told you last night that he was going out with some friends for a drink. Yet, he isn't back yet and it's already noontime. You don't want to be the clingy girlfriend, especially since you both have just started dating not long ago. You want to be able to let your boyfriend have his own space, but you're worried that something might have happened to him since he's not picking up his phone or answering your texts. What if he got kidnapped or hurt? And no one was there to help him?

Clicking on the contact of your boyfriend, you try calling again. After the four ring, someone finally picks up with a sleepy "hello?" However, it is not the voice of your boyfriends but the voice of a female.

"Who are you? Where's Y/B/N?" you ask, your eyebrows scrunched in an unsettling manner.

"Who's this?" the woman asks in return without answering your question first.

"Umm, the girlfriend of Y/B/N. Now would you please tell me who you are and where he is?" you snap with a hand perched on your hip impatiently.

"Oh... He still hasn't broken up with you yet?"

You're silent, confused but outraged. Your breath hitches in your throat, stopping the oxygen from entering your system. Blinking a few times, you eventually come back to your senses.  

"Excuse me?"

"At least he could've told me that he's still with his girlfriend before sleeping with me..." She sighs over the phone. Before you can respond or even react, you hear a shuffling in the background.

"Who is it, babe?" It's the voice of your boyfriend's, raspy and low as if just woken up. You don't need any more information as you already know exactly what is going on.

"Y/N," the girl answers him casually. There's a quick silence before the phone hands up from the other side. You stay standing frozen still, not even removing your phone from your ear. Your mind runs wild, emotions crashing into each other. A mix of rage and bitterness takes over your thoughts. Whipping out the messenger app, you pull up your boyfriend's contact. The three dots display on the screen from his side, indicating that he's typing at the moment as well.

▬▬▬

From: Y/B/N

Baby I'm sorry

[Read 1:29 PM 04/06/2018]

▬▬▬

You ignore the text, not knowing if he's sorry for cheating or for not telling you.

▬▬▬

To: Y/B/N

Don't text me anymore, don't call me, don't talk to me. I don't want anything to do with you. Apparently, we've broken up already according to your play toy, so let's keep it that way.

[Read 1:31 PM 04/06/2018]

▬▬▬

And with that, you block and delete his number, not even letting him explain himself. You honestly don't want to hear it, the lies or excuses he has.

The phone buzzes at an incoming notification. You're about to blow up at your boyfriend for somehow trying to contact you after your warning, except it isn't a text from your boyfriend this time, but your best friend.

The notification slides away as you lack all of your energy, not being able to click on her contact message. After a moment and a few more texts, an incoming call from your best friend displays on your screen, you decide to let it go to voicemail because you don't want to deal with anything else today.

Due to you worrying about your boyfriend all morning, you didn't get to eat any breakfast or lunch. You trudge to the kitchen, hoping some food will give you energy. As expected, there is no food in the fridge for your to cook or warm up. In the pantry, however, are packs of ramen noodles. You grab a pack, preparing a pot of water to cook them in.

Your phone rings again, your best friend's name in big letters on the screen. You sigh, caving in and swiping the screen to answer the call.

"Y/N! Why aren't you answering my texts? I can see that you've read them," your best friend calls over the phone, loud enough for you to almost drop it. Resting the phone on the counter, you click on the speaker option as you continue cooking your ramen.

"You literally just texted me, I was about to answer," you lie, turning the stove to a higher setting so that your ramen can cook faster. "What do you need that's so urgent anyway?"

"Are you with Y/B/N today?" your friend asks. The name of him just puts a sour taste in your mouth, your face twists in anger and disgust.  

"No," you snarl annoyingly, with a low scoff. Your best friend senses the venom in your tone of voice.

"What happened? Did you guys fight or something?"

"I don't want to explain right now. Why did you ask?" you say, quickly changing the subject.

"Oh right! Did you hear about the hot new club opening tonight? Everyone's gonna be there! And guess what else? I also know the owner!! He was my old roommate's ex-boyfriend, but they broke it off like a year or two ago. Still, he's super hot! You know what this means right?" your friend continues to screech, you chuckle at her expression, "We have to go!"

"You know what Y/F/N, fuck it, yeah let's go," you answer, turning off the stove as you ramen finishes boiling. You need to loosen up and totally forget that today ever happened and you want to down some drinks so you don't have to deal with any of your problems for today. Another high pitched shriek sounds from your phone, causing you to groan.

"If you scream again, I swear I'll cancel," you threaten and your friend gasps dramatically. She quickly half apologizes and then proceeds to tell you to meet there at 10 pm, the premiere opening of the club. However, knowing your best friend, this means to be there at 11 pm because she is always running late and you do not want to be at a new club alone.

It's currently 2 pm, you pour the hot ramen into a bowl and make your way to your television. You watch reruns of The Office as you gulp down the noodles hungrily.

Without you knowing it, you've already binged a whole season of The Office and you would've continued if your phone wouldn't have rung 3 times in the past minute. You pick up your phone, glancing at the time. Shoot! It's 10:30 already!! You mentally yell at yourself.

Your phone screen displays a spam of messages and phone calls from Y/F/N. Scramming up to your room to quickly get ready, you pick up the phone, leaving it on speaker again.

"Y/N! Where the hell are you? I've been waiting outside for more than 30 minutes and I also tried to contact you for that 30 plus minutes but guess who didn't answer... And the bouncer outside kept asking me if I was lost, and I kept on telling him I was waiting for someone and he just kept giving me weird stares so I just went inside without you. Now the line is gigantic so good luck trying to get in. I'm going to find the owner," your friend rambles on and ends the call when she's done, not giving you the chance to answer.

In a hurry, you simply put on a plain red graphic tee, tying it into a knot on the front, and some black ripped high waisted jeans. You add some light make up since you're going to sweat it all off throughout the night anyway, finishing off with a swipe of wine red lip tint. Before rushing out of the door, you stuff your phone and wallet into a small purse and slip into your black chunky high heeled boots. Y/F/N is a lot taller than you so whenever you both go out, you have to wear some sort of heels in order to not appear as a dwarf next to a model.

It takes about 45 minutes for the taxi driver to reach the club, as traffic gets more congested once you inch near it. You text your friend to let her know you made it but you doubt she will see it. She's probably using her goddess-like charms to seduce some guy.

Y/F/N was right, the line by the entrance to the club is really long, looping around the block. You seriously do not want to stand in that long line because, by the time you reach the front, it'll be the morning already. You try to see if you know anyone in line you can join but no one is familiar enough.

You push back your hair and walk confidently to the front of the line. People waiting sends you a mix of confused and angry looks as you pass them all.

This is not your first time in a club, you've learned how to weave your way through the bouncer with the help of the almighty Y/F/N.

As you reach the front, you see a man stand by the fancy entrance. He doesn't look like the typical bouncer due to his appearance and attire. The man isn't small but he isn't super buff either, like the bouncers you've met before at other clubs. His hair is a hazel brown flowy mess and he has on more eyeliner than you. His outfit, instead of the usual all black suit bouncers wear, is more of a street style outerwear, with a bandana keeping his shaggy hair out of his face. From where you are standing, the guy doesn't look very tall or intimidating, as he leans on the wall next to the door. He also doesn't seem like a challenge to get through either, building up your confidence.

You try to walk past him as he's chatting with a few girls in the front of the line, but a hand darts in front of your stomach, stopping you.

The arm belongs to the brown-haired man. He raises an eyebrow at you, still posed on the neon lazered wall.

"There's a line if you haven't noticed," he states and stands up from his leaning position. Now that you've gotten closer, the man is a lot more intimidating than you thought. His intense eyes bore into yours, the makeup making them look even sharper. As he stands up straighter, you realize that he is also much taller, even with your 4-inch heels on.

However, you do not let his appearance faze you.

"I know the owner, don't worry," you say, sending a smile. The man smirks with a low chuckle, his arm still doesn't leave your front side.

"Do you now? And how do you know him?" he questions, with a lift of his eyebrows. You quickly gulp, trying to think of a reason. In other clubs, the bouncer would just let you in once you said you knew the owner, but of course, that probably only happens because Y/F/N was usually with you.

"He's an ex-boyfriend of my old roommate's," you swiftly retaliate, remembering what Y/F/N said earlier over the phone. You thought that you've won, but the smirk is still painted on his face.

"And what's your name?" he asked, displaying a more playful kind of grin. The man shifts so that he's fully facing you.

"Why do I have to provide a name? There isn't a list," you respond, crossing your arms over your chest. Before he can say anything else, you continue talking.

"Anyway, if we're done here, I have people who are waiting for me," you say, grabbing the man's wrist and pulling it away. Without further comments, you proceed to walk through the door into a dark hallway, following the music. Without looking back, you can still feel his gaze on your backside.

At the end of the hall, there's a black curtain in which bright lights, loud music, and busy chatter pass through. You push the curtain to the side, revealing a large room with an extensive glowing dance floor, stripper poles, tables and chairs, and a bar near the back.

You can't even see the dance floor, with the wall to wall of people dancing to the club music. There seems to be no room for any more people yet bodies kept pouring in. The music is mostly techno but with occasional slow sensual songs that called out all the couples and drunks to grind on each other.

Different colored lights flashes and shines but somehow you spot Y/F/N on a couch by the side of the room. As you get closer, you see your best friend on the lap of some man, tongues down each other's throats. Her tight bright red dress rises higher as the man's hands reach up and down her thigh, playing around with the hem of her red lace panties.

You finally reach them as you lightly kick the man in the shin, causing them to both pull away. Bright red lipstick is smeared all across Y/F/N and the man's mouth.

"Hit the road, she's my date," I say as I tilt my head towards the door. The man shoots me an annoyed look, pulling your friend's face back onto his. However, Y/F/N pulls away and climbs off the guy's lap, fixing her dress.

The guy flashes a confused look between you and your friend.

"You heard her," Y/F/N says, running her hands through her tangled hair. The man grunts something like "ugh whatever" under his breath and trudges away.

"Took you long enough. Although, I thought you would have to wait longer since the line is crazy long," your friend says, plopping back down on the couch. You follow.

"Yeah, I just kinda walked in, after fighting some guy at the door," you explain, wiping the lipstick off of your friends face, "You look like you just sucked Larry the Lobster's dick."

"Livin' Like Larry," you friend responds with a lazy smile.

"Wait! Did the owner let you in at the door? I told him if a Y/N comes to just let her in," she says, slapping your shoulder to gain your attention.

"I don't think so," you reply without much thought. "Come on, let's go get something to drink, that's mostly why I'm here."

You reach out your hand to help your friend up. She groans as you pull her from her spot and make your way to the vaporwave themed bar. You both take an empty seat at the counter as Y/F/N orders two shots. Right off the bat I see...

"By the way sorry to pull you away from your boy toy," you apologize, grabbing the shot glass and tilting it back into your mouth, the small amount of alcohol burning your throat immediately. She waves it off with her free hand as she also downs the glass. Then, your friend signals the bartender for another round.

"Nah, he wasn't that great of a kisser anyway, and I was just passing time while waiting for you to finally come."

The bartender places another two shot glasses in front of the two of you.

"Hey, wanna play coinage?" Y/F/N suggests, calling over the bartender again and asks for an empty glass. You nod and pull out a quarter from your purse.

She places the glass in between us and beacons for you to start first. You carefully bounce the coin, trying to get it into the glass. The quarter hits the rim of the glass but doesn't go in. You groan as Y/F/N takes the quarter with a smile. She is the master at this game, you have no idea why you agreed. Your friend beautifully bounces the quarter into the glass with a "woohoo".

"Drink up!"

You grab the shot glass and gulp down the vodka in one swift motion.

After a few more rounds of this, you call quits due to losing to all rounds. Your head starts getting buzzy and the alcohol is slowly getting to you. You're not a lightweight when it comes to alcohol but you can't hold too much either, you're somewhere in the middle.

Your friend pulls you onto the crowded dance floor, where you both completely let loose, rolling and grinding your bodies to the beat of the music. The two of you have been to multiple bars and clubs, by now you know how to move your body steadily to the rhythm.

Song after song rolls by, all great remixes of your favorite hits. You scan around to see who the DJ is, wanting to compliment his music taste. The DJ booth is off to the opposite side of the bar, surrounded by neon lights and colorful disco balls. From the distance, you can't decipher the appearance of the DJ, with the lasers shooting in every which direction. You pull your friend closer to the booth, a swarm of girls already packed in front of the DJ.

As you get closer, you realize that the DJ looks familiar, though the alcohol causes your vision to blur.

"Hey, the DJ's kinda hot," you slur to your friend who nods back, both beginning to dance again.

"Yeah he owns the place," she tells you while she grabs your hands to sway them to the beat.

"That's cool," you say, "You should introduce me to him since you know him right?"

"Oooo good idea, let me call him over!"

Y/F/N turns toward the booth, waving his hands to get the man's attention. You're oblivious to anything as you continue to dance with your back facing the DJ.

The man scans the crowd, looking over all of the people enjoying their time. He sees your friend waving at him before signaling him to come. The DJ takes his headphones off and places them next to his music controllers. Another guy walks up on the stage to take over the music.

Your friend informs you that he's coming, though her words are a bit slurred. You turn around seeing a tall figure weave through the crowd, saying hi to people as he passes them but not stopping. the closer he got the more familiar he is to you. Until he's a few meters away, and you finally realize that the DJ is the same man at the entrance of the club. Yet, your brain isn't in its right mind to put two and two together.

"Y/F/N. Nice to see you again tonight," the man says once he reaches the two of you. You stop dancing and so does your friend who gives the man a hug.

"Hey!" she yells over the music. "This is my friend Y/N! The one I told you about. Y/N, this is Johnny, the owner of this new awesome club."

"You told him about me?" you ask with a tilted head.

"Yeah, I told him to wait at the entrance to let you in when you got here. So that you didn't have to wait because I'm such a good friend."

As if all of the alcohol completely left your system, your mind clicks and you glance up at Johnny. He has on the same smirk that you came across earlier when you first arrived.

"Y/N...so that's your name. If you would've told me at the door, I'd let you right in."

"I got in anyway," you shoot back easily, mirroring his smirk.

"By lying to me, the owner. I could have you kicked out by the real bouncers of this place."

"You'd be losing profit then."

He looks around the busy nightclub, then back down to you.

"I highly doubt that," he says waving his hands around the room. "Though, I wouldn't kick you out anyway..."

You lift your eyebrow in curiosity. Johnny leans his head downwards, closing in on your face.

"You're too entertaining.” 

The back of your neck starts to heat up, not knowing if it’s due to the warm bodies of the surrounded dance floor or the closeness of Johnny’s presence. 

"Entertained only by me? Then what's the use of this club?" you reply quickly. Your best friend whips her head back and forth from you to Johnny, one comeback after another, confused as to if the both of you are flirting or attacking each other.

"I met you in this club, haven't I? You've caught my eye."

"I'm not some art exhibit at a museum."

"Though you look like you belong in one."

You scoff at his lame attempt to flirt with you. Yet, somewhere inside of you thinks his attempts are rather cute and slightly working. 

"Would you like a drink? I'd like to talk to you more," Johnny offers a hand towards you. Your best friend gives you a light shove from the back, a knowing look painted in her eyes. You take Johnny's large outreached hand before he leads you to the bar, with a warm smile. 

a/n: i’ll proof read later lol 

#nct #nct 127 #nct u #nct dream #nct 2018 #nct scenarios #nct 127 scenarios #nct u scenarios #nct dream scenarios #nct 127 johnny #nct johnny #nct johnny scenarios #kpop nct #kpop johnny #kpop scenarios #nct 2018 scenarios #nct 2018 johnny #johnny seo #johnny scenarios #seo youngho #nct seo johnny #kpop fluff #kpop fics #kpop #nct kpop #kpop one shots #nct one shots #seo johnny

[straytears]

Spending Christmas Time with Stray Kids

group: stray kids

synopsis: Spending Christmas Time with Stray Kids

authors note: I decided to write another headcannon (idk what it’s called tbfh) just because it’s my favourite time of the year but I swear it didn’t even turn out that christmassy or even good bc I suck at sticking to themes and i’m a mess when it comes to these types of formats. But I’d just like to wish everyone a Merry Christmas! Please remember to stay safe and happy, you all deserve it 💖  

credits: all gifs are mine, sorry for the low ass quality too :)

word count: 2.2k

➵ masterlist

Chan

- this boi would use the Christmas time as an excuse to pull out all his boyfriend looks

- so expect a heap of his oversized and cosy jumpers with sweater paws

- would 10/10 be the type to lay your head on his lap near the fireplace and just stroke your hair until you fall asleep

- but is also the type to lay his head on your shoulder just for aesthetic purposes

- would spoil you as if he’s your sugar daddy

- his gifts would not only be expensive, but sentimental and full of inside jokes as well

- you guys would bake cookies and other holiday treats for the rest of the members

- would purposely get frosting on your face just so he can kiss it off

- “there was something on your face babe.”

- would take you to meet his family when he goes back to Australia

- always cuddling in order to keep each other warm

- not in Australia tho, bc if he tried that shit on you, you’d probably slap him bc it’s too hot

- 100% would buy matching thick knit sweaters just for the holiday season

- wouldn’t be surprised if one of your present’s was a song dedicated to you

Woojin

- boi would definitely serenade you with Christmas songs

- would wake you up by playing Christmas songs on his guitar by the foot of your bed

- you thought you died in your sleep and woke up to angels serenading you with their harps and mesmerising voices

- this boi would love spoiling you in general, but even more so during the holiday time

- expect extravagant gifts like a guitar or some new shoes bc this boi would lay down his life and constantly goes above and beyond to show how much he loves and cherishes you

- late nights in his room just learning songs on the guitar or singing together

- it’s not always serious singing tho, your guys’ jamming sessions can either be a full blown concert or just one where you are laying on his bed like a starfish while he aggressively bangs his head to the random strumming of his guitar

- I can 100% see him being the type to take you ice skating

- he’d be so patient on teaching you how to ice skate

- never gives up on you and always catches you when you fall or stumble

- would probably write you a little message about what he loves about you on the 25 days leading up to christmas

- on the final day, he sings to you his song that he composed just for you and when you hear the lyrics, you realise it’s the 24 things he loves about you

- enjoys sitting in front of the fireplace with your head on his shoulder whilst leaning his head on top of yours, hands intertwined

Minho

- the type to wrap your presents in bundles instead of traditional gift wrapping paper or bags

- Minho strikes me as the type to be really sentimental with gifts so he’d really think hard about what he was going to buy you

- have y’all seen the scene in me before you where Will buys Louisa her Bumblebee tights?

- yeah, you opening your presents from him will go down in a way similar to that

- would wear his circle glasses 24/7 during this time bc it makes him look like actual boyfriend goals

- would buy matching hoodies to wear

- constantly holding your hand in order to keep them from being cold

- would serenade you with cheesy ass Christmas songs

- would also slow dance with you to jazzy Xmas music like Michael Bublé

- also loves to hug you front on and kiss your forehead

- SWEATER PAWS THRU HIS HOODIE SLEEVES MAN

- lowkey would get jealous when you’re opening your gifts from the other members because of the way your face lights up

- feels so blessed nonetheless bc he managed to get a girl as beautiful and kind as you are

Changbin

- would buy you a plushie so then you didn’t feel lonely and left out when he cuddles gyu

- also buys you a matching plushie keychain so the plushie keychan gyu he got from you wouldn’t be lonely

- would take you to spend Christmas holidays with his family

- you’d learn how to be an aegyo master from his mum

- his family and yourself would probably go out to places with Christmas decorations just to admire their beauty and get to know each other better

- not really one for couple’s outfits but will make an exception during the Christmas break

- 100% be up for back hugs to keep warm

- always holding your hand and rubbing the back of it with his thumb

- bc it’s hella cold, he’ll blow into your hands to keep them warm

- for his christmas gift, you give him pastel clothes bc he all about the ‘dark’ concept

- still prefers to cuddle gyu instead of you during the nights

- tbh tho, as much as he doesn’t like to admit, he’s just a big softie behind that dark exterior

- melts when he sees you huddled on the couch in an oversized jumper with knitted socks

- would love when you wear beanies and would make you wear a santa or elf hat on christmas day

Hyunjin

- endless teasing if you weren’t able to put the star on top of the Christmas tree

- would also refuse to help you in any way at first bc he’s that type of bf but then he’d lift you on his shoulders so you can reach the top

- tbfh, if he ran out of ideas, he’d probably just put kkami in a box a minute before gift giving and hand it over to you bc he knows just how much you love the dog

- SWEATER PAW GAME STRONG

- would buy you oversized clothes just so your sweater paw game could be on par with his

- your dates during Christmas time would include going to aesthetic places so he can take photos of you like the professional photographer he is

- would love to also take candid photos of you in comfy clothes around the dorms 

- or when you’re just pigging out on food

- one of your gifts would probably be an album full of photos that he took that year, both candid and posed for

- would teach you a choreography to a christmas remix song

- most probably the jingle bells dance from mean girls

- would go to dog cafés with kkami so kkami can mingle with new doggies

- you guys would shop together to buy kkami some cute christmas outfits

- y’all would have a designated outfit for kkami on the 25 days leading up to christmas

Jisung

- clingy af 

- even more clingy with you than he is with jeongin

- deadass not even joking, this shit is 10x intensified during the holiday season

- would never let you go and would probably tie one of your sweater arms together

- constantly back hugging you bc he claims it’s the best way to stay happy and safe during the holidays

- 100x more smiley too

- would be the type of boyfriend to give you a handmade gift such as a self-composed rap explaining his gratitude for all you’ve done for him

- also, bc he loves Jeongin more than he loves you, he’ll probably forget to notice you whenever he’s in the room

- jks, but fr tho

- the rest of the members lowkey highkey feel for you bc Jisung loves you so much to the point where he’s always attached to you

- meanwhile, Jeongin is relieved af bc he doesn’t have to worry about Jisung kissing his cheek outta the blue

- but you’re all for Jisung’s clinginess bc you just find it so endearing and cute

- he’s honestly like a lost puppy following you around

- is always doting on you during this season

- randomly shows up to your door with food and christmas pastries

- cuddles are what he lives for and bc it’s getting colder, he can now do it every night without the worry of sweating and overheating

Felix

- being a meme is a 24/7, 365 day job

- just bc it’s holiday season, it doesn’t mean memelix will rest

- expect to wake up to a meme from felix on Xmas day

- tbfh, don’t be surprised to open your gift box from him and see a photo of a meme in it

- would be the type to come into your room and ring a bell in your ear just to wake you up

- all of this would be done in a full elf outfit, complete with the pointed shoes 

- would love to curl up in a fluffy blanket with you to watch christmas movies and stuff your faces with his favourite snacks

- your dates would include going to cafés to taste all the different kind of seasonal pastries and dishes

-  like Chan, he’d take you home to Australia to meet his parents and family

- would love that you automatically clicked with his younger and older sister

- recommends the types of Australian lollies to eat

- teaches you to eat Vegemite the wrong way

- you look over to him and see him eating it the right way and he only turns to you with a meme ass face

- would take you for a ride on his kangaroo and show off his kanga riding skills

- if you’re not aussie, he’d teach you some slang so you’re not lost when you get to Australia and can go find help at the nearest Macca’s. 

Seungmin

- my boi seungmin

- pls take care of him

- give him constant cuddles and kisses

- anyways, seungmin would be like minho in a sense that he puts so much thought into what he’s going to buy you

- he gives me the vibe of a really good listener and would probably remember you saying you wanted this type of thing in one of your earlier conversations and end up getting that for you

- christmas day, you guys would show up in your matching chunky knit sweaters with your sweater game stronger than minho’s

- santa hats ftw

- would take you for a walk in the park to admire the lights and just bask in your presence

- wouldn’t expect to get anything from you bc you yourself is enough of a gift and blessing to him

- constantly making sure you don’t fall ill and if you do, he’ll be at your beck and call until you get better

- his heart would melt if you stole one of his oversized sweaters

- gives you his hat/beanie/coat/jacket when it’s too cold bc he likes seeing you in his clothes

- when you spend christmas day with his family, he’s so happy bc you get to be a part of such an important event in his life

- would probably learn to braid hair so on christmas, he can style your hair

- and also, so he can have you quaking in your elf shoes from his hair styling skills

Jeongin

- 1000000% sure that he’s the type to throw a pillow at your face as soon as you wake up on Christmas day and run out of the room to prevent getting his ass beat

- 10/10 would use Jisung as a human shield to protect himself from your morning wrath

- probably too shy to outright give you your gift so you’d just find it laying on your bed after everyone leaves

- ‘Thank you so much for always putting up with me, I love you.’

- he may not be good at showing his affection to you but once you open your gift from him, you’d immediately start tearing up

- he’d give you a gift that reminded you of your favourite moments in your relationship

- you guys would try couple baking, but he’d purposely mess it up just to piss you off because you're literally like another Jisung tbfh. 

- ss much of a little shit that he’s capable of being sometimes, this boi is just a lil’ softie who needs to be taken care of

- would really appreciate when you hug him from behind to warm him up

- or take your hand in his to make sure his fingers don’t fall off from frostbite

- honestly, I feel like Jeongin is the same type of maknae as Jungkook and Yugyeom

- this means that bc he’s so used to being so mischievous with his hyungs, he’ll take that into the r/s with him

- you don’t mind of course bc that’s one of the reasons as to why y’all always have snowball fights to the death

- just bc it’s holiday season, don’t think you’re safe from the never-ending and near-death pranks he constantly pulls on your ass outta nowhere

not my best work, but I just really wanted to post this bc Christmas time yooooo but I do hope you all enjoyed it! 

#stray kids #jyp stray kids #stray kids hellevator #bang chan #kim woojin #lee minho #seo changbin #hwang hyunjin #han jisung #lee felix #kim seungmin #yang jeongin #stray kids imagines #stray kids fake texts #stray kids reactions #mtl

[a-life-of-living]

Breakups 101

I’ve only been through 2 breakups in my live but both have been horrific and extremely emotionally scarring. One I dated for 2 years partially long distance while I was in college, we wrrr the power couple and everyone was ready for our wedding including me and as far as he ever told me him. When I was home for a week for spring break he dumped me, said he’s changed his mind and left me on a curb in the rain. I know, it sounds like a bad movie. The second one I was only with for 2 months but in those 2 months we connected and went hard together, we went on multiple trips, bought promise rings, bought a car together, and let both of our families know how committed we were. When I went back to college in the fall he became distant and I had to hear from his friend what his issue was, I apologized for what I’d done and said if he still wanted to leave then ok he could call me and do it if not I’d fly him here and we could spend time together. He said he’d give it a shot he just needed money to fix his tires so he could get to the airport. I transferred what I could and the next day I heard again from his friend that he’d been in a car crash in a work car. Sick with worry I waited a full day to hear from him. He ignored me for a full day after that until one night I texted and said I know you’re busy but today has been awful and I need you. He blocked my number. I had to hear from his friend that the relationship had been over for him for weeks and he was flying another girl out from Canada to see him.

So without further ado...here’s what I’ve learned....

1. Keep busy go places and do things, not alone at first but with others!! Even if you’re not necessarily feeling it go out and see where it takes your mood.

2. Talk to people!! Those friends and family members that have been there through fights with your now ex and every other problem you’ve had?? Well they’re here now and they love you and are ready to help you and remind you how amazing you are through this whole thing. You’d be surprised who comes through with a little love and care when you reach out. Go out for coffee or have them over and sit in your pjs and watch a funny movie, make cookies or eat ice cream. If you don’t have people you normally go to or if your bf was that person, try and text someone who’s offered to let you vent before, tell them you’re feeling alone and need to talk. This is an amazing chance to cultivate a new close friendship. Finally at the end of the day your parents love you, I guarantee it. Tell them what happened and they’ll be there with love.

3. Allow yourself to have time to be alone and feel the pain. Contrary to the last 2 you sadly can’t avoid feeling the heartbreak entirely. Know that it is 100% ok and healthy to sit in your room alone or wherever and cry and scream and feel like you want to die. Eat ice cream, sit alone all day and watch Netflix with junk food. It’s ok. You need this in order to heal. If you lose control and begin to panic or feel the need to self harm. Fight it and or text someone. Anyone. They want to be there for you.

4. This one is importantly and a game changer. Delete the pictures, videos, snapchats, songs, delete numbers, things you wrote about them, block on social media, Polaroids, throw away their stuff, decide what you can keep and not have it be emotionally connected to them, if you think it’ll be a painful reminder throw it out. Now. Everything you need to do, and do it while you’re still upset and crying. I know it sounds crazy but right now you’re a mess and crying and in pain and if you wait to do it later it will just cause more pain and crying do it now and get it all out and done with. Don’t draw it out.

5. If you feel that everything is too much try and write or talk out your feelings you don’t even have to send it or say it to anyone if you don’t want but letting them out can allow your brain to fully process and organize them and open up space for you to breath and be ok.

6. The internet is your friend!! This sounds sad but a quick google will show you 100s of people going through the same thing you are or worse and asking for advice saying they feel like the pain will never end. Read they’re posts and stories and the responses. It’s strangely comforting to know you’re not alone.

7. Don’t listen to sad or relationshipy songs! They won’t help and are just going to make you miss what was and look back.

8. When you’re ready and strong enough allow yourself to honestly recognize what happened and why so that you can learn from it for your next relationship!

9. Exercise! Develop a work out routine, it gets the good chemicals and endorphins flowing in your brain and makes you feel great about you after. A workout is an amazing reset for the mind. As a side note showers, baths, and long walks or drives can also be

10. When you’re ready, start talking to new guys. Finding that there are other people who like you and who you get along with is so refreshing and comforting.

Extras:

Bath bombs are a great way to treat yourself without spending too much and still get a lot out of it. A nice lush bath bomb is $8 at most and they have them for $4, $6, and $7 as well go sniff around lush and grab one. Take a bath and post cute pics of the bomb fizzing, like ya do, set up your laptop next to the tub and have you time!!

Starting and keeping a bullet journal is really helpful and keeps you doing the things you want need and love while also giving you a place that’s your own to express yourself and keep your mind organized to prevent anxiety.

If following someone or something on social media is causing you pain, obsessiveness, or unhappiness unfollow/block them, and if need be let them know that it’s not personal, but at the end of the day you don’t need to say anything if you don’t want.

If someone is hurting you in their attempt to help. Let them know and tell them reasonably what you need.

Songs that I’ve found safe and empowering/comforting in different ways:

- Saturn / Sleeping at Last

- I Did Something Bad / Taylor Swift

- Blank Space / Taylor Swift

- Hardfeelings|Loveless / Lorde (go through this whole album and see what helps and what you need at the moment in my opinion it’s by far the best for breakups and really has all the emotions captured somewhere or another throughout)

- Woman / Kesha

- Let ‘Em Talk / Kesha

Netflix shows to start or get into:

- Breaking Bad

- Gossip Girl

- Gilmore Girls

- Bates Motel

- American Horror Story

- The Great British Baking Show

- Shameless

- Parks and Rec

- The Office

- Big Little Lies (if you have HBO)

- Mad Men

- New Girl

- Riverdale

- Sherlock

- Any of John Mulaney’s shows

- The Santa Clarita Diet

[buckywintersoldierbarnes2017]

A Hidden Pain - Part 4

Original request from anon: Could you please write a Bucky x reader where she works as the teams assistant? She’s got a violent bf but no one knows about it until he assaults her at one of Starks parties. Bucky steps in and kicks his ass. He helps her move out of her place to live with him since he’s got his own floor at the tower. Bucky Barnes x Abused!Reader Words: 1,680 Warnings: Swearing, deception, threatening behaviour, violence, and angst. Disclaimer: None of the GIFs used are mine. All credit goes to their creators <3

A Hidden Pain Masterlist

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11

FOUR YEARS AGO.

“Agent [l/n] this is….”

“Agent Barnes.” You smiled at the new individual to join the team. “I know. I have heard a lot about you.” The brunette’s face fell at your words, an anxious look enveloping his eyes, and for a brief moment you were wondering why he had reacted in such a way and then as the penny dropped your eyes widened and you quickly corrected what you said. “I mean from Steve, about your past, not about….well….you know.”

Good god you wanted the ground to just open up and swallow you right now although given that you were currently 25 floors up from the ground that wasn’t going to happen anytime soon. Your cheeks flushed a deep red colour which gained a soft chuckle from him.

“Isn’t it me that’s supposed to be nervous?” The grin that lit up his face was a complete contrast to the images of him you had become so used to during his time as The Winter Soldier and knowing from Steve how unsure his friend was about coming here you were relieved that you had managed to make him smile. “Anyway call me Bucky. ‘Agent Barnes’ makes me sound old.”

You raised a single brow as a rather cocky little smirk made an appearance and wiped away any sense of embarrassment you had felt before.

“I hate to tell you this but 100 is pretty old so you’re already screwed on that front.”

He feigned a hurt look, placing his metal arm over his heart, before he shook his head and let a laugh escape him.

“I walked right into that one.”

Steve was stood between the two of you his head moving from side to side as though he was spectating a tennis match or something, confusion etched all over his face, Bucky had always been friendly and open with him but any new people he met he was usually so wary. He was at a complete loss for words.

Your [e/c] eyes looked right into his enchanting blue ones, a comfortable silence falling over the two of you before your cell phone started to ring pulling you back down to earth.

“I better answer this. I’m sorry…..see you around old man!”

You threw him a playful wink before leaving to answer the phone call you always received at this time of morning. As you left Bucky continued to grin before Steve waved his hand in front of his face with a rather amused look on his face.

“Come on Prince Charming…there’s other people for you to meet.”

                                             * * * * * * * * * *

PRESENT DAY.

The grip that had been applied to your throat by his metal hand was tightening with every second that passed by, your eyes already bloodshot from a mixture of the pressure and the sheer lack of oxygen, but they never left him. Not once did you tear your eyes away from his cold and calculating ones.

He had to still be in there somewhere.

“That’s enough soldier. She’s not your mission….yet.”

Josh finally spoke out as he leaned himself up against the wall just a little bit away from where you stood and immediately Bucky’s hand left your throat. You took in a huge inhale of air the second you had the chance to and fell backwards as you started to cough. A sore line of bruises had formed on your skin, something that provided that much pain you didn’t need to look in a mirror to confirm it.

“Buck I know you’re still in there. Please come back to me.”

He said nothing, eyes continuing to stare right through you, as his breathing steadied and he stood himself up to his full, intimidating, height.

“Oh sweetheart I’m afraid your precious little ‘Buck’ won’t be making an appearance anytime soon. I told you I would make him pay for what he did and what better way to do that than having him be the one to hurt you. The very person who was trying to protect you from me.”

Your hand continued to rub at your sore throat as you narrowed your eyes and sent an angry glare in your boyfriend’s direction.

“Seriously? You activated a cold-blooded assassin just to hurt me? You have no idea what you have done Josh.”

“Oh no, you’ve got it wrong, what he is going to do to you is a bonus…..my payment for doing that which was asked of me. This brainwashed monkey is needed for other things.”

You weren’t able to say anything after that because the next thing you saw was the unmistakable shape and colour of Steve’s shield whizzing past you in the air. Bucky caught it with his metal hand without even having to look at what he was doing – his eyes seemingly glued onto yours.

“Soldier get me out of here.”

Josh was petrified, a vision of which you would have highly enjoyed had you even been looking at him, and as he voiced his command Bucky’s blue eyes finally tore themselves away from you…your heart fell down to your stomach as he stalked over to where Steve was stood in his Captain America outfit and they started hand to hand combat.

“Don’t think you’ve gotten away from me yet sweetheart….” Josh’s hand cupped your chin roughly, forcing you to look at him, before he drove his lips onto yours. His tongue dived straight in despite your refusal and he lapped up your taste in a rather sloppy fashion before pulling away and looking at you dangerously. “….he’ll be back for you.”

With that said he was gone and after Steve got thrown through the living room wall you saw Bucky race past in the same direction in which his new handler had gone.

“NO! BUCKY!”

You couldn’t let him get away. He needed you. When you had needed someone he had always been there, done things no one should ever have to in order to try and protect you, so you couldn’t leave him now….he needed to remember who he truly was. Without another thought for your own safety you pushed yourself off the ground, ignoring the fact that the room span when you did, your head in a completely dizzy state and ran for the back door. You only managed to a few steps before a hand wrapped around your arm and stopped you in your tracks, spinning you round to face the person who had stopped you.

“Steve get off! I have to go after him!”

“That is the last thing you should be doing [y/n]! Bucky isn’t Bucky anymore and if you go after him you are going to get yourself killed.”

“Please.” Your desperation was more than evident in just the one simple word. Tears were lining your eyes and building up so much that your eyes were beginning to turn just as red as they had done when Bucky had attacked you. “I can’t…..I would never forgive myself if we lost him completely.”

He looked at you in pity, knowing exactly how you were feeling, but he also knew that when it came to The Winter Soldier no one could just go rushing in and making rash decisions.

“I’m taking you back to the tower until all of th-“

“NO! YOU’RE NOT TAKING ME ANYWHERE!”

You balled your hand up into a fist before raising it up and driving it straight into his face. The pain that coursed through your hand after such an action made it feel like you had just broken each and every one of your knuckles and yet the super soldier had barely even flinched from it. Instead of cradling a bleeding nose he just let out a sigh before reaching one of his gloved hands down into his trouser pocket.

“I didn’t want to have to do this [y/n] but you have left me with no choice.” The only thing you had the chance to do was furrow your brows in confusion because before you could utter a single word he raised up his hand and drove something into your neck. Within seconds your vision went blurry as you were forced into a sleep you had never wanted. Steve’s strong arms caught you just seconds before you hit the floor. “I’m sorry but I’m not losing you as well.”

                                               * * * * * * * * * * 

You found yourself beginning to wake up but given the fact that none of your senses were coherent enough yet it was clear that for some reason or another you were doing so far too early. Through your unfocused vision you could make out red lights flashing around whatever room you were in and although it sounded like you were underwater you could also make out some kind of alarm.

In a rather vain attempt to get up you swung your legs around off the bed but found yourself falling off completely with a rather heavy thud that took the wind right out of you.

“St-Steve? Steve where are you?!”

Your words were no more coherent than the rest of your senses and it seemed like they were falling upon deaf ears too…..until a rather large shadow made its way towards you. A mixture of emotions filled you at this moment; a part of you was relieved that it could be the very person you had been calling for but another part, one that was fast becoming dominant, feared that it was someone you really didn’t want to be nearing you when in such a vulnerable state.

“Your friend is a little…..preoccupied right now.”

The voice, even in your exhausted state, was enough to make your heart skip as well as send a wave of fear through you. It was Bucky or rather…..The Winter Soldier. Seemed Josh was true to his word. He really had come back for you. 

But if he had managed to get through the security of the building that meant no one was going to stop whatever he was about to do.

Permanent tag list:@fallenfairy16@brieflybigwonderland @frolicsomefawkes @psychicwitchphilosopher @elwenia @imsecretlyromanburki @elaacreditava @marvel-fanfiction @wantingtobekorra @fandom-rpblog @just-call-me-your-darling @deanwinnchesterisbae @gayvvarden @marshmellowgems11 @justreadingfics

Story tag list: @melconnor2007 @harleycativy @magellan-88 @bexboo616 @kuren-chan @sebstanwassup @evyiione @imstuckyonyou

(Still room on both lists so if you would like to be added then just let me know, also if I missed anyone out just give me a nudge! <3 )

#a hidden pain #bucky x reader #the winter soldier #hydra #stark towers #the avengers #captain america #steve rogers x reader #not my gifs #james buchanan barnes #marvel imagine #the winter soldier x reader #request #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes #sebastian stan #chris evans

[fahye]

CP bachelor AU: part 13

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 | part 6 | part 7 | part 8 | part 9 | part 10 | part 11 | part 12

***

Laurent bends his legs, pulling his ankles out of direct sunlight and back into the shade of the poolside umbrella. He's had sunburned feet once in his life, and never plans to repeat it. He throws an annoyed glance at Damen, who is stretched out on the adjacent lounge chair. Damen has spent the last three days turning steadily browner while being very lax about sunscreen.

The villa they've rented on the west coast of Santorini has its own pool as well as its own tiny courtyard complete with mosaic floor and fountain. Sunshine off white stone and white paint makes it feel overbright and otherworldly during the day, shimmering with heat and light. Laurent tried for an hour this morning to go over his notes on the Theran eruption and the formation of the caldera, but the heat snuck into his brain, and he can't make himself mind. He feels looser, and happier, than he ever imagined he could.

The ratings for the show's finale were unprecedented. With the story of Erasmus and Kallias under their belts, the finale was marketed as an even more shocking twist, and Laurent and Damen have become the new faces of unexpected romance. They've been asked to present at the Logies, and to appear on every morning show in the country.

Laurent has never been a celebrity in his own right, nor wanted to. He's... adjusting.

The most obvious benefit is that Damen's stock in the eyes of his PR department has shot way, way up, and his father has--after a long talk with both Damen and Laurent, which left Laurent feeling like he'd run a marathon--agreed that Damen will assume control of the company as planned. Theomedes looked like a man who'd already planned the first three years of his luxury retirement and had one impatient foot out the door; he was ready to throw Damen the reins immediately.

Damen promptly turned around and declared that he was leaving the company in the care of his brother Kastor for six months, extending the leave of absence he'd taken to come on the show.

"To do what?" Theomedes demanded.

"This and that," said Damen, eyes dancing at Laurent. "Expand my horizons. Travel."

Laurent has only met Kastor once. He has a feeling that Damen's decision will come back to bite them later, but right now he can't bring himself to care too much if it means that Damen is here, with him, holding his hand in airports and telling him stories over lunches of bread and olive oil and fava and sun-wilted tomatoes, and kissing Laurent in the night breezes that sweep gladly through the open doors of the villa.

Tomorrow, filming begins in Fira for Laurent's new show.

Two of Laurent's major potential investors pulled out, after the season went to air. They cited various vague reasons but Laurent knew what they meant: that Laurent's uncle had managed to leverage the finale against Laurent, frame it as his unfortunate, inexperienced nephew being selfish; impetuous; unstable and untrustworthy.

Laurent's new network, however, looked at the ratings. They agreed to take the chance on his show.

And Laurent has another investor, now, even though he's been arguing about this with the investor in question for at least six months. And also for the last twenty minutes that they have been lounging here, poolside.

"I should make you take all the money back," he says now.

"What," Damen says, "I can't invest in my own fiancé's company?"

"Don't call me that," Laurent says, automatic.

Damen lifts his hand, and looks pointedly at Laurent's. The ring that had been donated to the show was some enormous, hideous diamond, which Laurent wore for publicity photos and promptly returned to the sponsor. Instead, he wears a plain gold band, and Damen has a matching one. They look like wedding bands, but for the hand they wear them on.

"Trappings," Laurent says, blithely insincere. "We're not engaged. You can't get engaged before you start dating, that's absurd."

"I seem to remember that's what I told someone when they approached me about being on a reality show."

Laurent throws a towel, with precision, at Damen's face.

Damen sets the towel aside and climbs off his lounge chair. He says, grinning, "Let's call it business. I expect a good return on my investment."

"Is that so," says Laurent.

"I'll settle for dividends, in the meantime."

Damen bends down over Laurent and kisses him with sun-chapped lips. Laurent hooks a finger in Damen's shirt and tries to drag him down further, but Damen pulls away and takes off his shirt, instead, ready to dive into the pool.

Laurent waits until Damen is down to just a clinging pair of board shorts, and then snaps a picture on his phone. After a moment's thought he sends the picture to Jokaste.

just sharing the wealth, he adds.

Her answer comes almost at once. just showing off, you mean.

It's late evening in Sydney. Jokaste is probably out somewhere, being sharp and sparkling. She's already been approached to do Dancing with the Stars, has booked a small part on a new TV drama, and appears near-weekly in gossip magazines, paired with various radio personalities and football players.

Three dots resolve themselves into another message.

btw I had coffee with kashel yesterday. do you know who she's seeing??

yes, laurent says.

you're bluffing.

he IS damen's best friend, Laurent points out.

stop being a smug asshole and go peel your bf out of those shorts.

Damen is in the pool by now, swimming aimless half-laps. Laurent watches him, feeling a pleasant heat of anticipation at the thought. Damen swims up to the edge and rests his elbows there; water gleams on the muscles of his arms and plasters his hair to his neck in thick strands. He sweeps a palm through the water, making waves, in an obvious threat.

"I will fucking destroy you," Laurent says. He picks up his phone, to serve as a shield of sorts--their phones are sacred and not to be endangered--then blinks as it starts to vibrate in his hand.

"What is it?" Damen says.

Laurent leans forward and holds out the phone so that Damen can see the name on the screen.

Damen mimes throwing it into the pool, and Laurent smiles. He leans back in his lounge chair. The phone keeps buzzing in his hands. After a moment, he picks up.

"Hello, uncle," he says.

"Laurent," his uncle says. "I'm pleasantly surprised. I thought you'd be buried in work, not taking calls from family."

"I can always make time for you," Laurent says.

"Producing a new format from scratch is a lot more work than taking over an existing show. You must be feeling stretched."

"It's kind of you to worry," Laurent says, "but there's really no need. After all, I learned from the best."

Since Laurent was seventeen, he and his uncle have spoken in code; everything they say aloud to one another, every email or text, is benign and deniable. Everything happens beneath the surface. Laurent imagines how pleased his uncle would be to report to his friends in the industry that he'd spoken to Laurent and the poor boy had sounded so stressed, and admitted to being in over his head.

He'll probably report it anyway. At least it he’ll know it to be a lie.

"I have to say it is a little disappointing, Laurent, that you were so desperate for capital you felt the need to attach yourself to the nearest bank account on legs. It doesn't look good, you must see that. I'm concerned that people won't take this little show of yours seriously."

Laurent lets himself smile. He enjoys arguing this topic with Damen himself, but he won't let anyone else question it. And if his uncle's skirting around calling Laurent a whore, he must be running low on inspiration.

He could come back with the obvious answer that it's hardly any better than everyone thinking he's no more than his uncle's pet project. But it's too obvious to bother saying aloud.

"I think I'll let the finished product speak for itself," he says. "Besides, there are some benefits. Now that everyone knows I'm off the market, there are far fewer people trying to wrangle an AD job by making indecent offers. I know how people gossip in this industry. I wouldn't want anyone to think that I make my personnel decisions in bed."

That is met with silence. Laurent meets Damen's eyes and makes a small face, and Damen starts to laugh.

Nicaise will be having lunch with Aimeric this week. An olive branch, of sorts, and perhaps an offer. Nicaise is far too untrusting to let Aimeric get away with anything; if they can avoid strangling one another in a Potts Point restaurant, Laurent's told Nicaise to extend the hand anyway. Responsibility ends where Laurent decides it ends.

"I'll be following your project with great interest," his uncle says, finally.

Laurent has friends, money, and manpower. He's not struggling just to maintain his footholds any more. This year, they're going on the offensive; if you're going to fight, you might as well do it from a position of strength. He and Damen have two companies between them, and all the influence that comes with a narrative that's grown bigger than them both. Damen is made for it, born to it, expanding and inhabiting the largeness of his life. And Laurent… well, Damen was right. Laurent enjoys a challenge, if he gets to set the terms.

"I'm sure you will," he says pleasantly, and hangs up.

He puts his phone on the table and pulls off his own shirt. Damen sends an inviting splash in his direction, droplets prickling coolly at his ankles.

Laurent dives in to join Damen, and the water folds over him like a second skin.

#captive prince #THAT'S ALL THERE IS #THERE ISN'T ANY MORE #and yes it will be on ao3 #when I have collated it #let it rest for a week #attacked it for an edit #etc. #thank you so much to everyone #for your messages #and replies #and tag spirals #ALL APPRECIATED

[pursuitofbrattiness-blog]

Second

Things have been stressful but otherwise pretty decent lately. My bf and I celebrated our first anniversary together and now we are beginning to look for places come August 1st. I started therapy weekly for the time being. My first real appointment is on the 29th. It's crazy how long this journey has taken. I always thought when you're in a dire situation like needing mental help or being suicidal that they swooped in and actually took care of you. Luckily there have been no copay so far, but my bill from the emergency behavioral outreach and the hospital have totaled $2400+. I keep saying I was taken involuntarily and I was, but it's not like I didn't need the help. The bills are a sobering reminder of where I was versus where I need to be. Sometimes I sit back and think where did my life go? I'm 27 now and don't see a very promising future, except if you are thinking in terms of retail management. My poor choices have limited me so much in my future. I have a poor credit score and work a job $3 ish dollars over minimum wage, so in turn I live in a shit hole, drive a shitty car, and have an overall shitty life. I try not to be mad or have any resentment toward anyone. Who am I kidding? I did this all to myself. Everything. So therefore I am the only one who can help myself get out of it. I used to do so much. Martial arts, honors student, gifted writer, won the geography bee, etc etc. And then everything just kind of ... changed. Gradually. I remember when I started dating. My first bf and I are still very good friends to this day. We were together for like two years. That is, if I could find him. This was before everyone had cell phones. You actually had to work for it. Anyway he came out of the closet and left me. I was unhappy at first but soon came to realize that I would be even more unhappy in a sham relationship and if I truly do love him for who he is (which I still do, always.), then I should be happy with him trying to find his own happiness. I feel like my existence is made up of chapters and each chapter is named after the boy or man I chose to be with in that period of time. I used relationships as a way to identify myself for so long that I lost touch with who I really was as a person. I'm not sure if I've still even found that girl yet. Overall I had a pretty decent childhood. We were never rich, but my parents always made sure we had everything we needed. My older sister and I each received an LL Bean backpack when we started first grade and we were expected to maintain it and keep it throughout elementary school, we had chores, after school program, etc. I started going to camp when I was around 8 and continued until 17. I took martial arts and aspired to do something with my life. My parents pushed us a lot though, and it was sometimes hard on us girls. They expected us to socialize and play outside with the other kids. When I was like maybe 5 I met the neighbor kids. It was soon after that I knew about sex, knew what a blow job was, and just generally things a 5 year old shouldn't know. I would say that one of the single worst memories I have in my entire life is this: Couldn't have been more than 6 years old at the time. The neighbor boy asked if I wanted to see something. He wasn't even that much older than me. Maybe 7? 8? It's really kind of fuzzy after 20 years. Anyway, of course I wanted to see something. He led me into the back hall to the apartment building we lived in and pulled down his pants, exposing his penis. He said now you. I wasn't exactly sure what to do or say. I do remember what I was wearing though. Minnie Mouse romper thing. Light up sneakers. I did what he said. He asked if I had ever sucked dick before. No, I replied cautiously. He told me to close my eyes and open my mouth. I did so. Wider he says. I tightened my eyes abs opened as wide as I could. And that's when I tasted it. It tasted like cigarettes and laundry detergent. It was brief. I pulled away and opened my eyes. I saw my sister and his sister staring in through the glass on the door we went through. I didn't know what to think. Didn't get it. Stuff like that happened between the brother and the sister and I until they finally moved away. To this day I know I'm not completely heterosexual and know that this probably was the catalyst. I have always been ashamed. Always hid it. Never wanted to talk about it. Would leave the room and feel uncomfortable if a lesbian couple was featured on TV, for instance. Nowadays I suppose the society we live in would say that I'm absolutely silly for hiding it. I never found out why I have such a shame for it. I'm bisexual through and through, but I really do prefer the company of men. It's weird. Sexuality is a vast and diverse thing, and talking about my own experience makes me understand a little bit more. Other bad things happened that I don't want to divulge right now. But they were really bad. And had a really profound impact on who I am as a person. I became the girl that automatically equates sex with love. Not necessarily a bad thing definitely, but it's also hurt me quite a bit. Men can be cruel. I can be, too, however. My second boyfriend was the prime example of this. I was 16 and he was 21 and I took advantage pretty damn hard. I mean, who wouldnt? I also took his virginity so nowadays I think about what he did and it makes more sense to me, especially given what I went through. Anyway this dude was getting SSI and I met him thru my ex boyfriend (yes the gay one) and on the internet kind of. It was a mixture. Anyway this dude had cerebral palsy and was getting like 550 a month. Of course once we started dating it was ALL going to me. Dumb shit, too. Dinners, $45 blankets at hot topic, just stupid shit. I was a kid so I liked dumb shit. He liked fucking a kid because he was/is a sexual predator. Ugh I got so fat and gross. I started the depo shot when I was like 16.5 or 17 and gained so much weight. I ended up getting pregnant and yeah something bad happened so we wont really go into detail about that. I started smoking weed as much as I could and drinking to legit get fucked the fuck up. Like puke, drink, repeat. Binge drinking. Soon the relationship between palsy dude and I was growing sour. He was starting to become physically abusive, and using items and marriage proposals, and cheap fucking 1/10 diamond rings from walmart to try to lure me in. I dropped out of high school and almost joined the fucking military. I quit martial arts. I was legit becoming a shell. Crying out for any attention I could at home. My parents were too busy trying to repair their marriage. I get it now, mom and dad. I can't even imagine how you guys did it all and managed to save your marriage. I understand why it had to be done. I acted like a casualty of it for years. It finally dawned on me that they were trying to save it for ME. For my sis and I. I'm truly grateful now. They are still together and seem to be more in love than ever. Someday I will have something this healthy. Anyway the first time palsy dude (and yes that is what he will be referred to as. First bf is gay bf. Deal with it. He loves it.) was physical with me was after some brief altercation we had had. I called him stupid. He was driving his fuckin piece of shit Intrepid and stopped short at a stop sign. He looked me dead in the eyes and wrenched my windpipe with his good hand. Don't you ever fucking call me that again. He said through gritted teeth. His forehead turned red and he started breathing heavily through his nose before shoving me backwards and letting me go. Instantly my eyes welled up with tears and I think .02 seconds after that, he was sorry. He was always fuckin sorry. It continued to get worse. Shoving me into walls, kicking me when I was laying in the fetal position crying. Blaming me for what happened when I got pregnant. Blowing my fuckin cell phone up and running up my parents bill, always wanted to know where I was. So I apparently had gradually decided months ago the best course of action was to make him my life and quit my sport, quit school, join the military and make him and army husband. It all sounds so fuckin ridiculous now, but that's what my plan was. Til shit started going sour. My parents intervened after finding out I had missed about 90 days of school. Everyday before I left, I unhooked the phone so when the school called looking for me, the line was unreachable. I ended up in alternative school where I learned math easily from a computer, and graduated high school with like a 3.2 average or something. I went to school 7 am to 10 am and worked as much as I could for a drug store downtown. Once I got that job I found my independence and literally decided one day I did not need to be treated the way palsy dude saw fit. I was hanging out more and more with gay ex bf and his little sister, among them their friends, which in turn became my friends. A veritable menagerie of different scenes, culminating into the love for two things. Partying, and trying to find the means to do so. I had a job so I would buy weed and booze any chance I could get and share with everyone. A lot of times I would go to gay ex bfs dad's house after school and wait for him to come over so we could hang and party. Smoke maybe do some pills and drink. There was another reason I would go over there. Gay ex bfs dad was a heroin addict and I felt really bad for him because he was very kind and gave me a lot of advice and tried to help me in my future. I feel like I was making him hamburger helper everyday for at least a few months. Always with a couple slices of cheese on top. He used to ask for it, but then I would just routinely go into the fridge and see what I could make for us. Sometimes when he would eat, he would start to go to sleep so I would make sure he stayed awake and smoked his cigarette and ate and had a drink of water before he fell asleep again. Sometimes I would make sure the little sister would get to school at a decent time, although no one could ever control her after you dropped her off at the middle school. I always loved that about her. She always marched to the beat of her own drum. Anyway, I broke up with palsy dude. He had been living in a rooming house in my city to be closer to me. I told him i was done. He smashed a ceramic mug he had and sliced his wrists over and over. I was in awe and surely did not know what to say or do. He blocked the door and cried to me to reconsider. I had to call the cops. I went to my friends house after and my friends mother consoled me. My parents picked me up and took me home. He killed the hamster he bought me after that I'm pretty sure. He harassed me for weeks. Finally the day after my 18th birthday he called my cell. Not sure why but I answered. He sounded hysterical as usual. I heard wind blowing into the speaker which meant he was outside somewhere. What the fuck do you want I said. He replied, through gritted teeth I'm sure, I wanted to do this on your birthday. Now the sound I heard after I can only describe as dropping a heavy book in an empty room, on a wood floor. The phone hung up. I looked at my friends who I was with at the time and said something to the effect of I think this motherfucker shot himself. So I decide to call back. This dude fucking answers. When I ask him what happened he confirmed my fear of shooting himself. But miraculously he DIDN'T DIE. BECAUSE AFTER HE TOLD ME WHAT HAPPENED I CALLED FUCKIN 911. I GUESSED THAT HE WAS AT HIS PARENTS, THAT WOULD BE THE ONLY PLACE HE WENT THAT DIDN'T HAVE THE SOUND OF THE CITY IN THE BACKGROUND. Oh how right i was and they jetted on over to put his face back together. So they did plastic surgery and looks 100% better now, which makes my story even more fucking unbelievable. I mean I haven't seen him IN PERSON for years, almost a decade actually, but his Facebook (yes I creep) makes him look completely normal. Here's the fuckin kicker. I had to get a restraining order on him. He still tried his damndest to contact me through any means possible. I was scared and just wanted it all to be over so I finally got the balls to tell him to leave me alone or face jail time. Needless to say he did. He's in an unhappy marriage and has a child. I only know this because he is a Facebook creep too and COULD NOT RESIST seeing what's up with my fine ass after all these years. Basically said gl with the kids and shitty marriage douche. Man that felt good.

[dinatlou]

DO ALL 100!

Here we go… I’ve finally done it!

1: is there a boy/girl in your life?Nope, I’m a single Pringle

2: think of the last person who hurt you; do you forgive them?It wasn’t actually one person it was a group of people and absolutely not. I can’t forgive them for what they said and did (I’m not going to get into it tho)

3: what do you think of when you hear the word “meow?”My cat :)

4: what’s something you really want right now?Idk, I’m not sure I want to get too deep about it lol

5: are you afraid of falling in love?Me!? Afraid of falling in love? What would make you think such a thing (you’re totally right)

6: do you like the beach?I do! Although I don’t go loads of tbh. The beach is so calming and peaceful. I just get stressed in the summer bc bees and wasps are about.

7: have you ever slept on a couch with someone else?I slept on one half of a sofa while someone’s sat in the other half?? Does that count? Wasn’t like cute or anything. It’s family so like????

8: what’s the background on your cell?Just generic one that came on my phone. My lock screen is me, my sister and two of my cousins

9: name the last four beds you were sat on?Mine x3 and my sisters :’)

10: do you like your phone?Yeah I do!! Idk what else to say ahaha

11: honestly, are things going the way you planned?NO OMG?! It’s actually the complete opposite to what I had in mind. I never even imagined my life would be remotely like this but I suppose my minds like a little dream land or something?

12: who was the last person whose phone number you added to your contacts?Probably two of my friends. I never had their numbers because we would just talk on Facebook or whatever.

13: would you rather have a poodle or a rottweiler?Poodle!!

14: which hurts the most, physical or emotional pain?Emotional!! If you get a cut, it’ll scab over. If you break a bone, you get a cast. If you’re hurt mentally/emotionally/psychologically there isn’t a quick fix to that

15: would you rather visit a zoo or an art museum?Hmmm, idk. Maybe a zoo? Don’t hate me I know they shouldn’t be there but..idk

16: are you tired?Always ahahha

17: how long have you known your 1st phone contact?I’ve already answered this one and I cba to write it out again ahaha

18: are they a relative?The girl I talked about in the other ask isn’t no, she’s a friend.

19: would you ever consider getting back together with any of your exes?I mean, maybe if I had an ex to even get back with?

20: when did you last talk to the last person you shared a kiss with?Never apparently, never kissed anyone

21: if you knew you had the right person, would you marry them today?Well, one I’m single. But if I was with someone and I knew I was going to be with them forever I would marry them…but not now. I’m only 17 and I can’t fork out for a wedding rn ahaha

22: would you kiss the last person you kissed again?Again, seems impossible.

23: how many bracelets do you have on your wrists right now?0 haha

24: is there a certain quote you live by?I guess “Ohana means family” from Lilo and Stitch? I used to say it a lot as a kid. It’s stuck really. Family is really important to me but I’m also a believer that family isn’t always blood

25: what’s on your mind?lol too much

26: do you have any tattoos?No, but I think I might get one at the end of the year (hopefully school won’t notice)

27: what is your favorite color?Hmmm, probably purple

28: next time you will kiss someone on the lips?Erm….unlikely

29: who are you texting?Currently no one. The last person I text in general was my sister lol

30: think to the last person you kissed, have you ever kissed them on a couch?They’re non existent!

31: have you ever had the feeling something bad was going to happen and you were right?Yes, think I have a sixth sense or something. I know when people are being off with me, don’t like me, I can kinda guess if they’re lying or not telling me something.

32: do you have a friend of the opposite sex you can talk to?Nope! Don’t really have many friends anyway

33: do you think anyone has feelings for you?No, probably not. But if someone out there does, hiya! Make ya self known (although a relationship is probs the last thing I need rn)

34: has anyone ever told you you have pretty eyes?Nope! My eyes are small and so dark brown they’re nearly black so…

35: say the last person you kissed was kissing someone right in front of you?Again, weird concept bc someone will be stood in front of me kissing no one?

36: were you single on valentines day?Of course I was? Have you noticed the pattern here?

37: are you friends with the last person you kissed?I’m going to continue to be sarcastic about this until the end you do realise?

38: what do your friends call you?My name? Mads or Maddie.

39: has anyone upset you in the last week?Idk, I’m upset a lot of the time anyway ahahah

40: have you ever cried over a text?Yep! I know ew

41: where’s your last bruise located?I’m not too sure? Probably my leg or something ahah

42: what is it from?Probably knocked it off a table or my bed lol

43: last time you wanted to be away from somewhere really bad?Now :) contemplating changing my plans to get awayyyy (it won’t happen tho lol)

44: who was the last person you were on the phone with?Apparently my dad last week! You can tell I like never ring people.

45: do you have a favourite pair of shoes?Any of my trainers tbh. My trainers or another pair of shoes that idk what they’re called lol

46: do you wear hats if your having a bad hair day?Na bc school. Can’t wear hats. Don’t really have any to wear anyway

47: would you ever go bald if it was the style?Probably not? Idk

48: do you make supper for your family?Nope!

49: does your bedroom have a door?It does but I barely close it?

50: top 3 web-pages?Idk. I don’t use a computer or laptop too often unless it’s for school stuff or Netflix

51: do you know anyone who hates shopping?Erm, probably. My dad likes food shopping but not like shopping shopping.

52: does anything on your body hurt?My shoulder, I pulled a muscle last night!

53: are goodbyes hard for you?Depends who it is and how long it’s for?

54: what was the last beverage you spilled on yourself?Probably Coke :/

55: how is your hair?Erm, it’s good?? Idk what this questions really asking tbh?? It’s short and thick and kinda blond now??

56: what do you usually do first in the morning?Roll over. Then go on my phone when I pull myself together

57: do you think two people can last forever?I like to think yes. That there’s someone for everyone and all that. But people change and grow naturally so it’s easy for two people to move apart.

58: think back to january 2007, were you single?OF COURSE!?

59: green or purple grapes?Either I don’t mind. I eat purple grapes more bc that’s what my parents buy

60: when’s the next time you will give someone a big hug?Idk

61: do you wish you were somewhere else right now?Erm yep

62: when will be the next time you text someone?Idk. Tonight, tomorrow? Normally it’s me texting my sister a video or smth

63: where will you be 5 hours from now?Asleep!

64: what were you doing at 8 this morning.Sleeping, I woke up just before 9.

65: this time last year, can you remember who you liked?No one. This time last year was difficult. Didn’t have time for that

66: is there one person in your life that can always make you smile?Yep! My two friends

67: did you kiss or hug anyone today?No. Did yesterday though

68: what was your last thought before you went to bed last night?“I feel so sick”

69: have you ever tried your hardest and then gotten disappointed in the end?Yeah of course I have? But then again, hasn’t everyone?

70: how many windows are open on your computer?Currently 0, I’m not on my computer.

71: how many fingers do you have?All 10 :)

72: what is your ringtone?Generic iPhone one

73: how old will you be in 5 months?Still 17…but I’ll nearly be 18

74: where is your mum right now?In the living room

75: why aren’t you with the person you were first in love with or almost in love?Bc they were a twat (I didn’t love them but said person fits this question best)

76: have you held hands with somebody in the past three days?Nope!

77: are you friends with the people you were friends with two years ago?Well, two people….I’m not going to get into this though

78: do you remember who you had a crush on in year 7?Yes. Kinda links to the earlier twat

79: is there anyone you know with the name mike?Yep! One of teachers hahah

80: have you ever fallen asleep in someones arms?No I don’t think so

81: how many people have you liked in the past three months?0

82: has anyone seen you in your underwear in the last 3 days?Nope

83: will you talk to the person you like tonight?Nope, don’t like anyone

84: you’re drunk and yelling at hot guys/girls out of your car window, you’re with?Unlikely scenario but probably my best friend

85: if your bf/gf was into drugs would you care?Well…yeah I would if they’re killing themselves everyday?

86: what was the most eventful thing that happened last time you went to see a movie?We got given the tickets for free off a group of lads!!

87: who was your last received call from?Sadly the doctors ahaha

88: if someone gave you $1,000 to burn a butterfly over a candle, would you?This screams butterfly effect to me….couldn’t

89: what is something you wish you had more of?Time? Energy? Confidence?

90: have you ever trusted someone too much?I have total trust issues. So probably :)

91: do you sleep with your window open?Occasionally

92: do you get along with girls?More than boys yeah. Idk. I haven’t found my people

93: are you keeping a secret from someone who needs to know the truth?No?

94: does sex mean love?Apparently not to some

95: you’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, is that a problem?Yeah? Bc I’m locked in a room by my fkn self

96: have you ever kissed anyone with a lip ring?:)))

97: did you sleep alone this week?Erm yeah every night?

98: everybody has somebody that makes them happy, do you?I guess yeah!

99: do you believe in love at first sight?I think it’s more lust? Or love with their looks/vibe? You can’t love a person by just looking at them

100: who was the last person that you pinky promise?Couldn’t tell you!

#long post #ask #anon #personal #it's finally done!