#alabaster theory

[thisangstriddenschoollifetragedy]

Alabaster the Doomed Session Fan theory

Ophiuchus went insane trying to give himself superpowers. This whole idea came from Ophiuchus limeblood status and all the different theories of the different powers limebloods help to make them a threat to Alternian Society (when in reality they were likely destroyed by Lord English's personal grudge over anything else).

Alongside that it Cross's over (heh) his Mad Scientist and Superhero motifs, considering that "Scientist gives himself superpowers" is a classic superhero origin. He's already somewhat implied to experiment on himself.

So what if he saw "something", science goes to far and now we have a guy who breaks into people's houses to scream at them about homestuck.

#alabaster the doomed session #ophiuchus #ophiuchus the great #theory #alabaster theory

[peccaberry]

I attempted to piece together the text of the old journal you find in Alabaster Icelands that has been corrupted in points where so can't fully read it.

I personally think this journal is in reference to the Hisuian Snow Short animated series on YouTube so I've used that to fill in the context! Maybe older Alec ran off to go find his childhood Zorua friend after his dad reminded him of it?

The original unaltered version can be seen here if you want to compare!

September 1

It's hard to believe it's been (number) years now since Alec and I began living together in the village. I was flipping through my old journal entries today and happened to be reminded of the Pokemon I met once...

In an odd way his old mask reminds me of the Pokemon that I met that day... But I remind myself that I live in the real world, not in a world of old fairy tales. Surely such things can't be true...

January 3

Why did I do it? Why did I have to remember that day? Why speak of it to my dear son? I regret so much but it's too late for regret now...

Alec is gone. I have lost him forever, I know it. He disappeared, leaving behind but the driven snow... Oh woe, why did I ever speak of it? If only I had held my tongue, kept my silence, I wouldn't have ever been cursed to know such grief...

#peccaspeaks #hisuian snow #pokemon #pokemon legends of arceus #hisuian zorua #pokemon theory #pla #pokemon legends #hisui #alabaster icelands

[ecoamerica]

Watch the 2024 American Climate Leadership Awards for High School Students now: https://youtu.be/5C-bb9PoRLc

The recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by student climate leaders! Join Aishah-Nyeta Brown & Jerome Foster II and be inspired by student climate leaders as we recognize the High School Student finalists. Watch now to find out which student received the $25,000 grand prize and top recognition!

#ACLA24 #ACLA24HighSchoolStudents #youtube #youtube video #climate leaders #climate solutions #climate action #climate and environment #climate #climate change #climate and health #climate blog #climate justice #climate news #weather and climate #environmental news #environment #environmental awareness #environment and health #environmental #environmental issues #environmental education #environmental justice #environmental protection #environmental health #high school students #high school #youth #youth of america #school

[leafyisgreennotblue]

With Legends Z-A, I gave him the unavoidable design. I had written so much background and trying to get it on Insta was a hassle, but luckily I’ll be able to fully put it here with no issues,,:

It was hard to steer from the typical older Emmet look but I tried my hardest to make it seem like it would’ve been. I tried looking up France fashion from 1600-1900 but it was either some ridiculous outfits or suits, and since it mentioned the redevelopment of Lumiose City, it was either working up from something like Jubilife village or was upgrading from what it already is. I’ve heard a lot of theories that Legends Z-A will be taking place in the future or bounce back from future to past, but since it’s hard to incorporate futuristic outfits without knowing “how futuristic” it’ll be, I stuck to something from a layer time period in France. I drew him more of a square shape in his eyes instead of triangular, both to signify age and his lost connection with Ingo. Maybe not a permanent design but I think it adds a lot to his demeanor. He kept Basic stuff like he still has his coat, hat, etc. because Ingo got to keep all his old stuff too, but since the trailer looked more modern and Pokémon were with people, I don’t think it would be all destroyed like Ingos just cause it seems like a more civilized nation alongside pokemon and if it really did get destroyed in some way, I have a feeling he would be able to get it repaired without it getting ruined again. Also in terms of the suit I think the darker color is a good parallel to Ingos pearl clan outfits lighter colors. A lot of the design choices were meant to parallel him anyways. Since Ingo had lost his gloves in his Hisui design, giving Emmet new ones felt appropriate for some reason. In terms of the cane I gave him, not only is he an old man, I think it’s kinda needed. Ingo had that little wristband to signify he was a warden, while I think the cane could be useful for a mega stone wink wink nudge nudge. Cute little accessories for them I’m so nice 💀 he could definitely have a slower lifestyle in comparison to Ingo, and I definitely could see him working at Lumiose Station (if it exists in this game) and even though he would most likely have his memory wiped too, Ingo still said the same train themed quotes even with his memory gone, and even then he still had SOME memory, it was just very faint. Emmet definitely could feel some “connection” to the station and say stuff like “Some late nights I think I see a man who looks like me, but upon second glance it’s just my imagination. Even if I can’t seem to shake it from my mind, it seems I still wish to see him again…” anywho for the drawing, I made a few references. The main one just being a reference of design, but the one in the top right corner was a small reference to Alabaster Icelands. I’ve seen a lot of people use the snow to give Ingo flashbacks to Emmet, and while I think my station one is more closely related to Ingos darker color scheme, I think having him in the snow was a good nod to that. The bottom right corner was a reference to a drawing (that probably most people already know what I’m referencing) that had Pokémon that I thought resembled them, and one of the ones I had included for Ingo was Klefki. So just a little salt to the wound (it wasn’t even that bad.) Anywho, I know the design isn’t very refreshing, but I tried to keep it as canonical as possible.

#pokemon #submas #subway bosses #subway boss ingo #subway boss kudari #subway boss nobori #subway boss emmet #subway master ingo #subway master kudari #subway master nobori #subway master emmet #sbms #subway boss #battle subway #ポケモン #サブマス #サブウェイマスター #ノボリ #クダリ #Ingo #Emmet #legends za #legends zygarde #I keep forgetting to post here #honestly I forget I have a tumblr sometimes #guys someone gotta remind me this place exists

[karniss-bg3]

I figured you’d be the right person to ask this question, why is Kar’niss’ skin super pale when he was originally a drow? 🖤

I had the same question myself and I did some digging a bit ago. All of the official drider concept art I've seen has depicted driders with dark skin, so it stands to reason that the transformation alone wouldn't be enough to alter his appearance. This leaves one interesting theory at play; Kar'niss was a Szarkai.

Szarkai, which translates to "ghost spiders", are albino drow. This is a very rare mutation that affects only 0.1% of the drow population. Their skin tones are so light in fact that they are able to pass as surface elves with little trouble. Some would think that this would make them outcasts but in fact Szarkai were viewed as a blessing of Lolth, hence their namesake.

There are some interesting crossover traits between Kar'niss and Szarkai that lean me more toward this theory, such as: -Szarkai look almost identical to drow outside of the skin tone. However, they have also been known to have minor deformities. The most notable is "gnarled and claw-like hands" which we know Kar'niss to possess. Originally I thought this was due to the transformation, but now I think he may have had it prior to the change.

-They are very adverse toward combat, preferring to let others do the dirty work so to speak. When the player engages Kar'niss in a fight one of the first things he does after his multi-attack is cast sanctuary on himself, protecting himself from harm and forcing his companions to take the hits. I also saw a video where someone cast banish on Kar'niss and when he returned he disengaged, healed himself, and ran from the fight. Now this was likely a bug, but it'd be on brand for Szarkai's desire to escape a fight rather than engage in it.

-They were mostly used as spies and gathering information since they could easily blend into surface societies. While there isn't much evidence that Kar'niss has much training in this field, what stuck out to me was the professions Szarkai favored. One of them is bard, and we have at least some notion that Kar'niss is linked to one musical instrument by way of the spider's lyre. I recall someone commenting asking if the lyre may have belonged to Kar'niss at one point and while I can't say with certainty, if it was and Minthara was merely holding on to it then it'd lend credence to him being a bard formerly. That and he's super pissed if you play it poorly!

-I haven't done a playthrough with Minthara in my party so I am not familiar with all of her dialogue lines. However, she does know Kar'niss in some capacity and the lyre is used to call him. Her last name is Baenre which is one of the most notable drow houses in all of Menzoberranzan, famous for Jarlaxle the leader of Bregan D'aerthe. I say this because Szarkai seemed to be far more common in noble houses, which Baenre would be. This could, even if loosely, establish a link between them.

IF this is true, that puts a very intense spin on Kar'niss' potential history. Szarkai were protected, considered valuable, and their existence kept secret. They were removed from drow life, and even kept in far safer conditions than others. This didn't mean they were shielded from the cruelty drow are known for but it was a different kind of cruelty. Often trained from a very young age to be spies and saboteurs, and subsequently being shipped to human cities to do as ordered. It makes me wonder what Kar'niss could've done to incur Lolth's wrath to the extent she warped him into a drider. Betrayal? Failure? Weakness? Or perhaps Lolth just really wanted an alabaster pet, it's hard to say.

Thanks for the ask!

#baldur's gate 3 #kar'niss #drider #bg3 #karniss #baldurs gate 3 #szarkai #drow #lore #answered

[catcas22]

Prehistory of Elden Ring

I can't rightfully call this a theory. This is somewhere between a fanfic and an elaborate headcanon. But it accounts for a lot of little lore-tidbits that I don't really have enough canon info to do a proper theory on.

            Eiglay was the first of the gods, the World Serpent who held all potential for life within himself. Having consumed the world that came before, he birthed a single egg and then laid down to die. While the egg slumbered deep within the molten core of the world, Eiglay’s corpse lay unburied. The Twinbird descended to peck out his eyes, and where the cold blood spilled there sprang up a sapling.

            The sapling grew tall and black, beset by thorns. This was the birth of the World Tree -- the Lampwood Tree, vessel of souls. The Twinbird roosted in its branches.

            As a being of twinned natures, the Twinbird gave birth to two broods. The Deathbirds, corpse-eaters who embodied the decay of the flesh, and the Angels, winged maidens who embodied the immortality of the soul.

            When the Numen sailed from across the fog, they found the Lampwood Tree and its ghost-light towering above all. They built their city of Helphen at its roots, and they both feared and worshipped the Twinbird. For they were a long-lived people, and they dreaded the end all the more for it.

            Far across the stars, a spawn of the void fixed its eye upon the Lands Between. It sent forth soldiers graven from stone, raining as a shower of meteors upon the Lands and led by generals of onyx and alabaster.

            The greatest amongst these were the dragons, animate stone armed with the power of the storm. They were the teeth and claws of the void, and none could withstand them. In a final desperate stand, the angels met them in a great battle in the sky. In an early mirror of the Dread Communion, the angels allowed themselves to be devoured. In doing so, they granted the dragons the gift of free will.

            Now imbued with souls of their own, the dragons took names for themselves and turned against their former masters. Led by the mighty Placidusax, the Lord of the True Storm, they hounded the lords of the void from the Lands Between. They raised up beasts to serve them, giving the gifts of will and reason as they had been given in turn, and they raised up their city of Farum Azula to the south of the Lampwood Tree.

            When they looked upon the eternal dragons, the Numen resented their own mortality all the more. In all things, they sought to cheat death. They built great stone golems to fight their wars. They hid away within their walled city, prolonging their years through alchemy and dark hexes. And at last they created beings made by hands, the children of silver. They sent these thralls out to do the work of the living, to risk and to struggle, while the Numen hid away as if already entombed.

            As the dread of death consumed every waking moment, the Numen dwindled in splendor and in number. They built grand mausoleums to house their dead while the homes of the living stood empty. They embalmed their forefathers and set them in places of honor while their sons died childless. They spent their years seeking the riddle of immortality, and all the while they left the business of living to their silver thralls. And at the end Helphen became a mausoleum in truth, street upon street lined with manors for the dead while those few who still lived lingered in ruined houses and dark corners.

            The Numen remnant who rejected this slow entombment intermarried with the children of silver, and their descendants were the Nox. These were a people equal in stature and nobility to the Numen of old, and where their fathers had cowered at the shadow of death, the Nox looked to the stars.

            Having seen the calamity that had once fallen from the stars, the Nox set themselves to study the movements of the firmament. They raised the Eternal City of Nokceles atop the dead city of Helphen, and in the years to come they established the sister cities of Nokron and Nokstella.

            As their crowning achievement, the Nox constructed the Black Moon, a gravitational well of such magnitude that it could guide the paths of the very stars.

            It came to pass that the Twinbird hated the dragons. The great raven coveted the warmth of the living, and it sought to gather all souls back to itself. While the Deathbirds continued to bring it ashes to eat, with the loss of the angels all the souls of the newly dead were left to roam free. Most of all, the Twinbird hated the ancient dragons, for they lived without fear of death and refused to relinquish their souls.

             In the midst of this, a great ember fell to earth, the burning core of a red star. A giant by the name of Uhl took it up, for the giants had ever worshiped the flame. He sought to carry it down to the Lampwood Tree, to break the hold of death and lay the seed of a new age.

            The Twinbird descended upon him in great fury, cold ghostflame in its wings. It would have snuffed out the ember and Uhl with it if not for the intercession of Placidusax. Twice the dragon and the raven clashed within the storm, and twice death was beaten back. At their third meeting, the Twinbird cast down Placidusax and ripped away one of the dragon’s five heads.

            Uhl might have fallen then, but the lords of the Nox raised up their Black Moon as a shield. For a few precious moments, they confounded the Twinbird. Then Uhl split open the black tree of souls and planted the ember within its heart.

            As souls once frozen and calcified mixed into a great molten core, the World Tree changed -- no longer the Lampwood, guide of souls, it became the Crucible, the wellspring of life. Uhl carved the face of the Fell God upon his breast and named himself the god of the Age of Fire, and he welcomed Placidusax as his lord and consort.

            Now the Nox were consumed by envy, for they were proud, and while they were permitted to exist within Uhl’s order they were given no place of prominence. As their bitterness festered, they fell to the vices of their forefathers.

            They delved once more into alchemy, seeking to thwart the very laws of nature. They raised up thralls of their own, silver tears as warriors and albinaurics as menial slaves. They denied that they had ever been born of silver, and they were all the crueler to their creations for it.

            At the height of their hubris, they called out to the void that they had once sought to hold at bay. For it was whispered amongst their most gifted scholars, if a Black Moon made by hands could sway the paths of stars, then what power had set those paths in the beginning?

            Might there be a god of the void, a Dark Moon of whom their Black Moon was only a paltry imitation? Might this god be beckoned, coaxed to inhabit a mortal vessel as the Fell God had inhabited Uhl?

            By the labor of their greatest alchemists, the Nox crafted a vessel for the Dark Moon, an Empyrean born of silver, a Lord of Night to challenge the Lord of the Crucible. But in the end they were taken by the very void they had beckoned, dragged beneath the earth and left to grow low and stunted.

            And as the age of the Nox perished in its infancy, a new star fell to earth. An unnatural thing, a beast of light that despised the chaos of the living, a beast of void that denied the primacy of death. And from the ruined scions of the Numen, the Beast plucked an Empyrean vessel.

#elden ring #elden ring lore #elden ring theory

[e-adlirez]

Thea Stilton Treasure Seekers Review/Ramble

Behold, an impulsive ramble about a possibly-obscure trilogy that's been translated to English during quarantine-ish, adding to the obscurity.

So the Treasure Seekers, huh? :3

Coming out a little prior but more or less over the course of quarantine and thus a lot of people not having ready access to it, the Treasure Seekers is what turned out to be a trilogy of what it says on the tin: the girls hunting down cool treasures as a result of going down the world's biggest and highest-stakes scavenger hunt written a hundred-ish years prior to the present time.

Gonna be giving MAJOR spoilers for the first book in the trilogy, and there'll (probably) be one post per book in the trilogy. If you haven't read the book, here's a copy on the Internet Archive you can read before skipping ahead to the review, enjoy, it's pretty good. If you've already read the book or don't care about spoilers, please proceed below the cut :3

The story begins with the girls on summer vacation in Scotland. Shenanigans get started when they meet this old hermit woman who has in her house a mysterious heirloom tapestry with a mysterious poem on it.

The tapestry has this poem that talks about a place with sweet winds, petals that will lead you to something beneath them, something about midnight and birds, and an alabaster garden created for the "jewel of the palace" (like me to you), that is guarded by a friend with deep feet. Sounds like a whole lotta cryptic shnit the theory heads would enjoy :D

Anyway so the girls go visit Beitris (the hermit woman) the next day to return something they borrowed from her only to walk into a holdup :D

Said holdup-ers are these two grunts led by this mysterious lady hiding her identity under a black fedora and thick-framed Ray Bans. The girls deal with that situation real quick and get the guys to scarper (if you're wondering how they did that, "the police are coming"), and once it all blows over, they find that the thugs only stole the tapestry despite ransacking the entire place like raccoons. Such a realization leads to a revelation on Beitris's end, so she entrusts the girls with the tapestry's backstory in a segment I will describe as LAAANNNEEEE LOOOORRRREEEEEE (said in a MatPat voice, we'll miss you king :'])

-

The tapestry was a family heirloom passed down to Beitris by her grandmother Petra, who got it from her older sister Aurora Beatrix Lane, who is basically British Amelia Earhart. Wasn't into girly shnit, liked being outside and also archaeology, studied in the University of Cambridge as an Archaeology major and learned how to fly a plane, all while punting early 1900s gender norms into oblivion with her pants and motorcycle. Motorcycle queen, plane queen, archaeology queen, but then everything changed when this British Amelia Earhart did a British Amelia Earhart.

The context behind Aurora Beatrix Lane's disappearance is something relating to her work with her mentor Jan Von Klawitz, who was doing archaeology things with her and probably got up to some wild shnit, but we would never know because Aurora is very secretive about her plans and her destinations, and she only came home to the UK once, after her first trip, and that was when she gave smol child Petra the tapestry to guard because it led to "a very precious treasure", but she can't show it yet for the time being. The vibe was Aurora was planning on using the tapestry to show the treasure it hides once she's done with her archaeology shenanigans.

But then she did an Amelia Earhart but completely untraceable since she never revealed her destinations, so uh there's that :D

-

Back to the present, this little storytime from Beitris has gotten the girls sucked into a rabbit hole. They are now hyperfixated like nobody's business and this Aurora Beatrix Lane is JUST LIKE THEM FR, and as a result they decide that y'know what they still have a few days before classes in Mouseford starts, and while they're at it, they're gonna find Beitris's tapestry and maaayyyybeeee find the alabaster garden. First destination: Girton College at the University of Cambridge, Aurora Beatrix Lane's alma mater.

The girls take a quick jaunt to Girton by train and then by bus to have a lil' chat with the dean, who reveals to them that they're looking for the central archive if they're gonna be looking for the deets on a student from a hundred years ago, but uh the archive is closed for the day, please come tomorrow. (Wonder why, maybe it's because they rode from Scotland to Girton by train which takes a shnitload of time. /nsrs but fr tho I wonder if the original Italian had them drive over there by car-- they did rent an SUV, and going by car would be way faster, like it'll only take a seven-hour drive faster) They come back the next day, are let into the archives, and oop, they find a well-preserved diary with Aurora's initials hidden in the Stanley Library.

Y'know what that means, LANE LOOORRRREEEEE

-

So two months into her accompanying Jan on his excavations, she notes that Jan's been acting a bit sus lately-- being very nervous, being extremely protective over his luggage, being weird about hiding some of the relics he's found, and also a weird-ass incident where while exploring a small village's old castle, Aurora found a hidden chamber with a tome inside that Jan immediately snatched and was like "I'll take care of it don't worry, don't worry about the protocol stuff I'll be fine I'll take care of it". And then he went back to "normal" after that. Hmmmm.

A month later, while Jan was talking with one of his collaborators on their train to England, Aurora stumbled into the tome again, suspiciously in Jan's personal luggage instead of being properly archived and catalogued like it should've been. She read it, saw a thing about the Seven Treasures of the World, and that caused her protagonist genes to kick in since now she's now very tempted to look into finding them and showing them to the world.

After that, she went to some libraries to investigate and eventually decided to confront Jan about the whole treasures thing and his first reaction was he was pissed, calling Aurora a snoop and everything poking into his things. Then after calming down he said "just pretend to not see", but oh no, dear reader, Aurora was not gonna pretend to not see. She ain't gonna pretend to not see the fact that her mentor was actually a treasure hunter and collector who'd been using his occupation as an excuse to snatch some nifty treasures and keep them to himself like every European country who's stolen artifacts from Asian countries ever, ohohohooooo noooo, she's gonna do something about it.

-

The girls scuttle on over back to Scotland and Beitris, to find that uh oh dear, the thugs came back again and this time they were asking about the girls specifically. Beitris pulled the same trick the girls pulled to get them to leave. So NOW the thugs are looking for the girls for whatever reason and wanna know their deal. Anyway, the girls show Beitris Aurora's diary, tell her about the summary, and also that unfortunately some of the pages are missing, and the diary doesn't say shnit about the tapestry so far. Beitris helps by giving them a letter that Aurora sent to Petra about the tapestry and its treasure, but interestingly mentions that she should "only trust Robert".

Since I haven't mentioned him before, Robert Neville was Aurora's flight tutor, a flying medic, and was toootttallllyyyyy just friends with Aurora you guys they were totally just frie--

He is dead in the present time, but his nephew John Neville is a (former) lighthouse keeper for the Ar-Men lighthouse in the IÎe de Sein, Brittany, France. So the girls head on over there, land in France, insert a thing where Vi feels like she's being watched but is like "maybe it's just a me thing, I dunno".

They head over to the Île de Sein, find an old man who turns out to be John, are invited to his house, tell him about their situation, and John mentions that he himself has been researching like crazy too about Aurora ever since hers and Jan's simultaneous disappearance over the same place at the same time in the same terrible storm. And also the fact that Robert was totally devastated when he got the news and spent years looking for her. He gives them his notes that he's accumulated over decades of researching in his pastime (which amounts to just Aurora's trip to Mexico), and tells them that since Aurora was looking for seven treasures, they'll need to find out where her seven trips took place, which will not be easy because Aurora was extremely secretive, and she only made her first trip even remotely public.

First place is Mexico so might as well head on over-- oh god the holdup-ers are back to holdup.

The thugs snatch Aurora's diary and book it before the girls can do much besides get an impromptu ocean bath, and oh dear, the thugs' boss has them now, and it's not the mafia cosplayer lookin' woman. But that's something I'll address later :3

Nonetheless, they carry on since the thugs never stole John's notebook, and they use it to go to the Puuc Route in Mérida, Yucatán (sounds very specific until you realize that Mérida is the capital of the Yucatán, and one thing everyone and their mother knows about the Mayan ruins there like Chichen Itza) to find more clues.

They do some more research on the Puuc Route, find some clues about "an invisible place, guarded by the chattiest of creatures", discover that it means they have to go to Uxmal, get a dub against the unfortunately acrophobic thugs, and realize that yes, Aurora did in fact sneak another one of her diaries in there.

This one doesn't have as much Lane Lore to contribute besides a clue that the girls find leads to Kannauj, Uttar Pradesh, India, a city known for its perfumes :3 sounds like "sweet winds", doesn't it? Oh and there's also something about a place with two lakes, which turns out to be Lakh Bahosi, a bird sanctuary about an hour's drive away from Kannauj. The girls head on over and try to do some investigating, but it doesn't take them that long to find a pair of grunts struggling under the weight of a very familiar tapestry while their boss was struggling to supervise them with her heels constantly digging into bird sanctuary dirt.

Anyway so the girls concoct a little scheme to steal the tapestry and the thugs fall for it like fish for a fishing lure, and they managed to scatter with the tapestry. After getting to a private space in the sanctuary, they find a clue that leads them to a set of coordinates that they find is a beeg tree. Oh and the treasure seems to be a present that was made for someone close to Mumtaz Mahal, as in "the jewel of the palace", the woman the Taj Mahal was made for; and the tapestry has a set of coordinates that is leading them to a beeg tree, with deep roots/feet. Oh hell yeah it's all comin' together.

They get to the tree, deal with the mafia lady for a little bit, find the treasure, and it turns out it's a very exquisite perfume bottle made of alabaster called "The Perfume of the Earth". They find a little note from Aurora explaining the treasure and its value and the significance of finding it, and now the girls have found the treasure Aurora had been searching for, and now's the time for a villain reveal?

So I haven't talked about him yet and have glossed over this guy for the entire ramble. See the mafia lady, Cassidy? Yeah she's not the big boss here. It's this guy who has a whole secret base in Denali National Park, Alaska, and has been overseeing everything behind the scenes. And by everything, I mean everything: He was alerted to the whole thing with Cassidy's first raid of Beitris's house, found out about the girls' involvement, and for a good half of the book, was trying to figure out what the girls' motives are for interfering with his line of work and what they might know about this whole thing he's looking for, which is the alabaster garden.

This guy has been keeping tabs on the girls through Cassidy and her thugs, who've been stalking the girls ever since France. He and Cassidy figured out in Paris that the girls are Mouseford students on vacation, and he was the one who gave the orders to snatch the journal from there. He was the one who told the goons to tail them to Mexico, and he was the one who managed to look up the girls' names, backgrounds, reasons for being in Scotland, all from the comfort of his base in Alaska. And only then, only then did he go to India himself to supervise and put a cap to his goons' buffoonery.

Who is this guy? Well, he is a treasure hunter who just wants to enjoy the treasures Aurora Beatrix Lane has hidden from his great-grandfather a hundred years ago. That's right, meet Luke Von Klawitz, the current heir to the Klawitz legacy and the treasure trove Jan Von Klawitz left behind in spite of his disappearance. Unfortunately Jan was better (and old enough) to secure a family legacy of greedy artifact hoarding.

So while the girls were in Lakh Bahosi, Luke was too with the goons and Cassidy (who is not his right-hand man and more just... a subordinate trying too hard to impress him), being the babysitter with these guys on leashes, as he tries to keep their stupidity under control. He intercepts the girls as they're about to leave Lakh Bahosi, blocking their path, and asks about the alabaster garden. The girls obviously don't spill and prolly would've gotten themselves blackbagged and interrogated had a friend they made prior to Lakh Bahosi not shown up in her dad's truck and came in clutch. (It sounds cliche and like it came out of nowhere but trust me it makes sense in-universe-- after the girls left the friend's family restaurant that they were hanging at, Luke's goons came over to interrogate them about the girls and where they went. Subtlety, who is she?)

The girls bring the perfume to a nearby university so it can be brought to a museum, send the tapestry back to Beitris, and return home to Whale Island, to read the last bits of Aurora's second journal and presumably to

So that's the book :D I put in a LOT of spoilers, but I'd say that reading the book is still worth it because you'll be able to get the connecting tissues that tie the organs of this story together. H-hopefully this all made sense . .'''

First things first, if you're not used to how Scholastic kids' novels are written, then uh, you might wanna get used to it, because the English translation of Thea Stilton is very... that. It's not beating the kids' book allegations in English, unfortunately. On the brighter side, though, it's pretty good for Scholastic standards! The pacing's very fast, but it feels about right-- gives me the same energy as diving deeper and deeper into a rabbit hole and going to all sorts of places because of the hyperfixation responsible for consuming their sanity for all of a week or so. The dialogue isn't nearly as atrocious as the worst it's capable of being (oh trust me we'll get to that). The tapestry puzzle and how the girls work towards solving it is very coherent and logical for the situation they are in at the beginning, and it's very satisfying to see everything come together and for things to slowly make more and more sense in the poem despite it being as vague and puzzle box-y as it was.

The Lane family lore is very well-thought-out, and Aurora Beatrix Lane is the perfect spiritual predecessor to the girls, what with her love for adventure, love for travel, strong moral compass, and the strong compulsion to elbow drop every single feminine social rule under the sun. I can totally buy her being someone the girls would totally hyperfixate on researching, because she feels like that kind of compelling character-- a passionate young archaeologist who decided to put her own safety on the line for the sake of what she believed in and to dunk on Klawitz and his selfish (and very illegal) goals of hoarding the treasures of the world to himself.

As for the villain, I'll be real gamers, Luke Von Klawitz is probably the most intimidating if not terrifying villain in the entire franchise. He has drones spying on every corner of the world for him, he has goons he can contact at any time and have them do his bidding (to mixed results it seems), he has cutting-edge technology that he uses for terrifying means, all in the safety and comfort of his secret underground base in Alaska where he has his little basement filled to the brim with historical artifacts he's kept all to himself to enjoy. Lemme run this through you again:

He was able to learn the girls names, the university they're studying in, and why they were in Scotland in the first place, all without ever meeting them face-to-face or having his goons interrogate them directly. All he needed to learn all of this was the (not very helpful) research by Cassidy, and a few commands put into his world-connected supercomputer.

Are you intimidated yet? I sure hope you are :D this guy's got a lotta potential is what I'm saying. He's a bit of a brat who wants what he wants and wants it immediately, but he's also a bit of a chess master who looks over things in the background while his minions do all the work for him. Really the only thing holding him back is the incompetency of his goons, and technically it's not even that they're very stupid-- Cassidy and her grunts Stan and Max are very good at swooping in out of nowhere to wreak havoc, dip in and get out before anyone can do anything about it. They're decent if not good at the job they're usually assigned: low-level grunt work. Unfortunately they're not good at much else, which drove Luke insane this entire book, haha.

The girls' dynamic with Cassidy, Stan and Max was refreshing in the sense that the girls aren't always getting punted by them, and the goons aren't always taking Ls just from physical contact with the girls. Cassidy and the goons always had the element of surprise on their side, being able to show up out of nowhere and do their thing before the girls have time to even blink; but once the girls figured out their whole shtick, it was easy to learn that they are easily outclass-able by five mouse Oxford students in braincell count and thus act accordingly. They force the girls to think fast and come up with some snappy plans on the spot, and the girls force Luke to realize he hired Tweedle Dee, Tweedle Dum, and Tweedle Dummy as goons :D

Now uh, I have been complimenting this thing the entire time, but there is one little thing I have an issue within this book, and that is the whole... Power of Friendship thing they've got going on throughout the book.

Yes, unfortunately, the Friendship Curse has claimed this hardcover series too, and while it's not the worst here, it's still... it's still a bit atrocious :D

For instance, the conclusion Cassidy and Luke come to for the girls' reasons for interference is "friendship". Literally, Cassidy literally says to Luke, "It seems they did it out of friendship, Sir", and then Luke responds with an evil cackle and is like "FRIENDSHIP? THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP DOESN'T EXIST IN THIS WORLD! AIN'T NO WAAAAYYYYY THEY'RE NOT FIVE SCHEMERS WHO WANNA GET THE TREASURES THEMSELVES", which is like... I don't get that vibe from Luke anywhere else in the book? Luke values efficiency and getting what he wants-- he's not hired Cassidy to be all buddy-buddy with her, he hired her for a job and she has to work to fulfill said job. He just wants competent employees, and y'know what, that's valid. Not a single part in that have I seen "ew power of friendship". It's very villain for the sake of villainy kind of energy, which I don't think fits Luke with the other bits of information we get of him? He's following his great-granddad's footsteps-- not a single minute of that did that mean "the spirit of friendship doesn't exist get yo head outa the cotton candy"

Then there's... how this applies to the girls.

inhales

WHY DID THEY MAKE VIOLET THE GROUP'S FRIENDSHIP PROPHET GRAAAAHHHH

I probably would make a full-blown rant about this at some point, but one thing I never liked about any of the hardcovers was how Violet of all people is the group's assigned friendship prophet. She'd occasionally make a comment about how uh something something the power of love is the strongest of all, and every single time I don't like it :D

Sure fine you can chalk it up to character development since her early months in Mouseford, but in the earlier books it's heavily established that she's the pragmatic one, the braincell keeper, the one who keeps the girls' group ADHD on track or the one who reminds them that "hey we've been at this for a really long time and it's now 2AM, we should really turn in now". Being a friendship prophet is a Colette thing, not a Violet thing, and I'm not trying to insult Colette or anything like that. I would be far more okay with it if Colette was the one to go on about the "power of love" because she's literally the HOPELESS ROMANTIC! She's the one with her head in the clouds, the one most likely to fangirl about ships in movies, the one who chooses to ship Romeo and Juliet and pretend to not see the entire second act of said play for the sake of believing in love.

If Colette had a line where she gushed about the power of friendship, I would've just chalked it up to "that cheesy-ass statement is something she'd totally say ngl", as opposed to the jarring whiplash I get from seeing Violet of all people call upon the Power of Friendship.

Again, probably will rant about this at some point (lemme know if you're into that idea), but yeah -m-

Literally just chuck the power of friendship bits and replace them with something more practical/realistic/grounded/whateveryouwannacallit, and it's basically perfect! Even the bits where the girls make friends on their journey is believable! Those don't have to be altered at all! Geuh it drives me insane, almost to the point of wanting to do something about it....

Well, that's enough rambling for today. I can't use up all my steam on this first book-- I plan on making ramblings for the second and third books, after all.

See ya Stilton fans, and for the newcomers from Twitter, welcome :D I hope you enjoy your stay :D

#geronimo stilton #thea stilton #thea sisters #book review #book rant #book rambles #unfortunately treasure seekers 3 isn't available on the archive as far as I'm seeing :'3 #which is disappointing because GWAAAHHH #not gonna give any spoilers but it and book 1 are tied for my favorite in the trilogy #i remember reading the first treasure seekers and immediately feeling nostalgic because i severely missed the girls treasure hunting #high stakes and all that crazy stuff that the older books delivered #tangoing with some crazy villains with some hella power and not like the latter four graphic novels did #i missed that a lot so having it in treasure seekers made my at-the-time 15-year-old self very happy #ipads dieded rn but once i get it back and fixed and hopefully not factory reset i should draw some treasure seekers doodles fr #maybe something like i dunno aurora beatrix lane #who knows :]

[ecoamerica]

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[andbrokenmemories]

So it's weird how like. The Kennet girls are good at everything, aren't they? [pale spoilers ahead]

Like that's obvious, it's textual -- it's very textual, other characters being in something like awe over it over and over and over across the story. The girls are very good at this, and they have a deep well of power. This comes up continuously.

what's weird is thaaat a lot of the fanbase seem to like, enjoy that. Enjoy having protagonists who can play around with magic in a way Blake never ever could have. I kind of get that, I won't like shit-talk it too hard. (I do like Verona, y'know?)

But it's an interesting fact. Because Wildbow's the underdog protagonist guy! At least in action scenes, that's his whole thing! Taylor and Blake have to eat shit and die to claw their way to victory, and often those scenes work for me. And it's one of the things I think WB gets the most praise for? Like, from his established base. It's a conscious choice to not do that for Pale. He like, introduced the idea that this kind of wild practitioner would be especially powerful. He made that up for this book.

I wonder what that decision looks like -- after Ward, and Ward's issues, especially, since that seemed to be the first break from this. Underdog protagonists seem to be the default, for him; the thing he has most experience with. I've seen posts from him describing his process -- put characters against the wall without having a pre-planned out for them, so WB himself has to puzzle out exactly what they can use to make it out alive -- and he seemed to derive like... An actual enjoyment, out of it?

Yeah, there are fights in Pale where they're up against the wall... even one where, with Dire Consequences for us all, Wildbow had them lose because he couldn't see a way for them to win!

But it's not the same. I'd honestly say they usually lose because of their like, lack of full maturity -- their child soldier-y emotional rawness and uncertainty -- their lack of cohesion, as the book usually plays it. Lucy cannot stop John from joining the Contest because she can't hold her nerve against him. The girls cannot stop the murder plot from coming to fruition because they lack unity, aren't working together as a team. Emotional stuff. The girls have more tools in their box than any Wildbow protagonist before them, by far, but they can't always use them properly to get the W, for emotional reasons, for character reasons.

In theory, that's an interesting direction (maybe, possibly), and I should be relieved that Wildbow is trying something fresh. In practice... I've said I don't like Pale's fight scenes. I think Wildbow is plainly worse at this than the content of his previous works.

Part of this is seen in the Contest. Or, at least, how Wildbow Posts about it. If you can't tell, a specific WoG lives in my brain: Wildbow said once that he kept the story going past Break because he genuinely did not believe the trio could beat Maricica. I can imagine him doing his typical calculus for this, and what led him to that conclusion, maybe. For example, we've heard a lot about the ability of the Fae to manipulate stuff, aaaand to have the girls come along and undo all of that with minimal information to begin with wouuld sort of. Damage our belief in Faerie significance. Still, though -- cards on the table, here -- I think this was a Dumb and Bad choice. (It's a sidenote to this post, but I think it's very strange that, in-story the straw that breaks the camel's back is shown to be the Alabaster allowing shit to go on rather than throwing in with John, effectively a betrayer revealed moment -- a thing that, even if sorta his intention from the start, he could simply say 'aw beans i never really planned this out far enough' and just drop. for the sake of wrapping up a better story. and naturally i believe this would have been better also because it means we never would have fucking gotten White Woman Animus!! i digress. i digress.)

Maricica had weaknesses the story gave us to nibble on, and those weaknesses... are just kind of dangling threads, now? As of where I hopped off? like, guess she can't be that inexperienced with people if she became a goddess and started a cult and helped with all that red heron shit lol

So it's that thing I said, about fight scenes being more character driven. But then also, he's clearly thinking about this the same way as ever! As shown by his weird logic with framing the story going past Break as a thing he Had To Do, for Logical Reasons, or at least that weighing on the decision. a thing that is silly and i disagree with on it's face. right?

And then this shows in the sheer quantity of fight scenes -- if the girl's main limiter is internal emotional context and stuff........... uh... why are there so many fights? Why wouldnt the story naturally curve towards. having fewer fight scenes when theres no other way to square things away. that progress character arcs. whyyy do i care about fight scene 129 when i know how strong these girls are. whyyy are we fighting so many random others, and dedicating genuinely long segments of story to them, rather than montaging that shit? Getting it over with? If it has to be there at all? (for reference -- I just tried to think of a Random Pale Fight i fully don't think mattered. i selected the random like. angel summoner guy? with the fortnite constructor angel. that's a part of the musser invasion or whatever. this is a character with literally no substance, just a musser-side goon. From him entering the ongoing! fight to Lucy getting out of dodge is 4.6k words. Plague 12.7, the Mannequin fight, up to Mannequin leaving -- that's almost the entire chapter -- is 6.9k words. on the worm wiki, i saw there's a brief 'major events' summary of that chapter. i couldnt tell you the major events of the Pale chapter, of which that section of fight is like a third, maybe. lucy gets a bit more upset. lucy gets in a few quips against musser-side characters that actually matter but actually dont matter much to how that broader conflict is resolved. i guess.)

Wildbow writes any random fight the girls get into as being worth as many words as his fights in the past! the scrappy, pay-offy ones. bleh. My point in all this: you cannot simply set your protags up in the way I'm positing, here, and then continue to use the same vocabulary of every other serial anyway. it straight up doesn't work. it's exhausting. The Future is An Eternal Slaughterhouse 9000 Arc. Look, thats a criticism that boils down to 'web serials are too long'. And I'm not sure I care too much about web serials being too long! I have read longer web serials with longer fight scenes! I have written fiction with a longer average word count per chapter than Wildbow, at least during Worm! its a real criticism, but its not one im amazingly interested in personally. But the Kennet three could've had weaknesses to play around -- or at least, more weaknesses. We are in a Post-Pact world, and in this Post-Pact world, the magic in Pale really barely feels like it, uh, relies on discourse and presentation. like at all. And that seems like an option to give these characters obstacles! An option Wildbow gestures at during the Musser meta-arc!

but what struck me getting that word count comparison earlier, skimming that fight? The girls just aren't operating in that world. There's never a thought for presentation -- maybe sometimes, for a slight edge. But it never really matters, certainly not after the blue heron. They're using glamour as a workhorse tool, covering goblins in it for brief misdirects to get an edge in a fight; they're calling on the same shrine spirits over and over. They don't build up tools over a portion of story then cash them out for a satisfying win, they're just... strong. They have more items in their bags than Wildbow probably knows what to do with. Strong enough for just Lucy to dunk on any random set of practitioners, but not strong enough for the story to just skip that part, and not strong enough to just solve the plot until it's time to go fuck up Charles and end the story.

I know you could argue that I'm making this up, or that it's what some people prefer to what Pact was doing. But I just think it's not even what wildbow is good at! (and i always theorize that when wildbow is writing kind of bad, it's probably because he's not actually engaged or happy with what he's putting himself through. did he read a specific thing that made him personally excited to make the girls so versatile? I don't really know, but I don't get that vibe.)

And I have a couple of specific things I want to point out to try and prove this is like. a thing at all, to wrap up on: First, Glamour is used as this very, uh, soft magic thing, this very basic narrative tool. A pure mechanic of, like, mental states. If you're shaken, if you're uncertain, your glamour gives out on you -- if you shake your opponents, make them skittish, your glamour is better at misdirecting them. This is fiiine? But too vague for what Glamour is. Wildbow simply failed to properly present tradeoffs to one of his character's main action verbs, one that literally had those tradeoffs in Pact. And one last example to try and prove this: they dont even wear the hats and cloaks anymore duuude. Like, in my eyes: there was a very simple to read gambit being made, with the hats and masks and cloaks? You are awakening early, you will always have awoken early: You accepted an early shield against what that meant. A constructed image in place of the image of a fully-fledged adult, masking that youth; Whimsical and inherently magical, inherently wild. It's a very basic tradeoff, and one the story promises you it knows: even if they really would rather not have to go through the whole song and dance of suiting up, if it's tactically suboptimal or else they mature out of it and realise it's not for them, they will never be able to escape it -- not without giving up power. A mark accepted that cannot be given up. A mechanical restriction on their powersets to make up for some of their advantages, that also has some character relevancy. The Good Stuff.

except yeah it can. be taken off. it doesn't super matter. not really. they do plenty of magic without all the stuff on or even any of the stuff on -- it's rarely presented as an obstacle. it doesnt really matter. Because then, you see, they couldnt mature out of it and do cool stuff! it'd be. annoying. frustrating. they'd have to like. deal with changing past the natures they made for themselves. they'd have to. be characters. with character issues. that present themselves in fight scenes. you know?? what are we doing.

#ramble analysis #look. this is long but im not super confident i have the deets to back it up #analysis of my memory of pale ass post #but! the books long. frankly #so this is what you get #pale #wildbow #pale web serial #palecrit

[aina-otsuki]

okay so like hear me out. You know how we’re getting Wrath of the triple goddess? I have a little theory about what could be happening. I might be wrong though.

so anyone remember Son of Magic, Alabaster Torrington. Right? Hecate is known in the myths as a goddess with three faces. Which in a way could be called triple or a trio you could say. Now does anyone else remember Alabaster saying he’d get revenge on Percy when he least expected? So, I believe we’re going to be getting an Alabaster cameo along with him finally trying to get the revenge he so swore to invoke.

But that’s just my theory. Again I might be wrong but this has been I can about since the book was announced.

#Rambling #Pjo #alabaster torrington #Wrath of the triple goddess #idk what im doing

[cerseimikaelson]

HI I HAVE BEEN OBSESSED WITH THE PLOT FOR WOTG AND I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR SOMEONE TO DISCUSS MY FAN THEORIES WITH SO HERE ARE MINEEE:

Since the plot is taking place over halloween week, we might get trio in costumes, either as a part of the quest to outsmart a monster or something, or as a satisfying ending to a hard quest

Annabeth's architecture skills will def shine while they're reconstructing hecate's mansion (hopefully we get more of annabeths supposed fanclub)

Since the description starts with the three of them settling into Hecate's huge mansion, there will definitely be fun times of them living together and percy will DEFINITELY have a "i cant wait to do this in our future when we're old" moment

People have been debating on the UK cover of the books. some say annabeth looks black. some say that its just like that bc of the shadows, but i saw someone say that it might be HAZEL because of the purple looking shirt and she's black and shes definitely going to be involved in the story because she is associated with gale the polecat and hecate herself (so hazel is the old friend whos gonna make an appearance)

For the new friends??? i have honestly no idea but im gonna go with a new hecate kid like blanche in cotg

I'd love to hear your opinions and your fan theories as well!!

Heyyyy finally a fellow WOTG fan!

First of all HALLOWEEN. I definitely think Annabeth has never been trick or treating before (as a result of her not having a great childhood, running away and living at Camp Half Blood since she was seven) and Percy is going to be on a mission to fix it. I can't wait to see Percy's memories of Halloween (what he dressed up as, what Sally did to make it special) and probably the quest will end with the trio eating candy or something.

Hecate's mansion is the PERFECT Halloween setting. She is the goddess of magic and dabbles in potions and enchantments. What better place to celebrate Halloween than a gigantic mansion with hidden rooms and trapdoors and magical labs and whatever. Of course the trio will demolish the house in seconds and will have to rebuild it (Cat in the Hat anyone?)

PERCABETH petsittting!!!!!

The old friends might be Hazel, considering Hecate is her mentor, sounds like the person to call for tips on how not to piss her off. But she will probably be at Camp Jupiter, so she probably won't make a physical appearance. Maybe in an Iris Message when the trio calls her in a panic.

New friends.... I truly think Alabaster Torrington might be it. Or a completely new character, probably related to animals of some kind, considering they will be looking for a mastiff and a polecat all over New York. All gods have animals as sacred symbols, is there anyone whose domain is more relevant to them? Demeter, maybe?

We will probably get some more Percy and Poseidon interaction, those are always cute (in an awkward, I have no clue what to say kind of way).

That's pretty much it, I think. Thank you for the ask bestie. Did you read the Chalice of the Gods? Any thoughts?

#percy jackson #ancient greek gods #wrath of the triple goddess #cerseimikaelson #percy jackson series #pjo fandom #ask #rick riordan

[gutsybitsies]

WIP draft from my Chthonian AU. This takes place after Tua famiglia, Mia famiglia. Timeline wise, this is after Annabeth arrives in Camp Jupiter and takes the quest, but before she returns victorious.

Ethan sighed and rubbed his forehead, trying to stop the incoming migraine. Around him, the dryads and underworld nymphs argued about scheduling conflicts and activities room reservations. Half of the camp was still under construction, meaning that the dryads who taught Music Theory and Ancient Greek are competing with each other for activities space. Nico’s eyes had glazed over, meaning that even though he looked to be paying attention, he was fast asleep. 

Ethan frowned as he pulled Mabel and Oakely off of each other, why were underworld nymphs so ready to fight all the time? For the past few months, ever since Annabeth disappeared and that demigod Jason appeared, Nico had been gone longer and longer from their camp. 

Last night, he had mentioned privately to him and Alabaster that things were not looking good in the Underworld, and that he had to help out Hades ever since the Doors of Death were open. 

“Let the gods burn themselves! Who cares about the Giants, about Gaea, who cares about any of them?”

Nico groaned against the flat palms of his hands, squeezing his face as he tried not to fall asleep. The dark circles under his eyes looked haunting. “He’s my father, Al.”

“We are your family!” 

“This place can’t exist if Gaea wins, she’ll destroy us all.” 

“Not if we side-”

A tendril of shadow shot out and slapped itself against Alabaster’s lips, silencing him. 

Nico’s tired eyes had turned almost molten with darkness, and he turned to Alabaster with a dangerous glare. “I am the leader, I make the decisions, you listen to me, you report to me. And I say this: you don’t make any unauthorized decisions, you don’t step a foot outside the camp unless it’s been approved by Ethan, and you fucking. Shut. Up.”  

“If you ever so much as breathe a hint of what you were about to say just now,” Nico said quietly, as Alabaster struggled against the tendril of shadow keeping his mouth shut, “This camp would be burned to the ground before this new war is even over. You can’t be this fucking stupid, after everything we’ve been through to have somewhere we belong?” 

He broke free of the shadows, “I want victory-” 

“And I want everyone alive,” The shadows around the room moved ominously, before Nico gritted his teeth and consciously pulled back his powers. He kneaded his forehead, looking tiny and overwhelmed as he sat on the throne of sharp, sharp swords. “Fuck, Al. I just need you and Ethan to helm this place and keep everyone safe, okay? I can’t be worried about you causing someone to smite this place down because you can’t control your tongue.” 

Ethan kept his face calm as he nodded and gestured for Alabaster to calm down as well. 

“Don’t worry about us, Nico,” he said. “Go and do what you need to. But remember,” he tapped Nico’s shoulders. “Get to the infirmary and have your checkup.” 

Which led to Nico falling asleep with his eyes open during activities meeting. Eventually the exhaustion must have caught up to him, because he finally slumped over his chair and his head thumped onto the table.

After a healer mandated and Clovis supervised nap, Nico’s dark circles looked a little better, and there was even a hint of color back on his cheeks. He pulled Ethan aside to his cabin for a meeting before he had to leave again. 

“Ethan, I need you to watch over Al and the rest of the campers,” Nico said. “I don’t know how long I’m going to be gone this time, I have to go and find the Doors of Death. I can’t have him lead an uprising here or run his mouth off and get everyone killed. I’m going to have a meeting to tell everyone about Gaea and the Giants so that they don’t hear it from any other source.”

Ethan nodded, “Go easy on Al, he’s worried about you. He doesn’t want you to run ragged doing missions that no one will appreciate you for.” Ethan gave Nico a handful of charms that Alabaster threw at him. 

Nico rubbed his hands over his face, before taking a deep breath and putting on a determined look. “I know. All the more reasons to keep everyone safe. Rally everyone up.” 

After Ethan left him to be alone in his room, Nico sighed again, he’d been doing that a lot recently. He had just returned from New Rome and found an amnesiac Annabeth wandering around there. Her steely gray eyes tried to place him in her memories, and her normally neat dreadlocks were in a state of disrepair. Mars had given Annabeth a quest to free Thanatos from his chains, but there was more to do if they wanted to avert disaster. Nico was the only one able to go and find the Doors of Death, no one else would be able to go through the Underworld as freely as he could. 

Jason was giving him a hard time, as well. Ever since he figured out that he was a Roman demigod after his quest, he was trying to reach out to Nico as often as possible because according to him, "there was no way I haven't seen you before." Nico didn't know what to tell him, he definitely heard about Jason in New Rome, and Hazel had mentioned him before, but he truly had never stopped in New Rome long enough to actually meet the guy. He tried to explain that as much as possible, but Jason still found time to Iris message him as much as possible "to get his memories back." Nico definitely didn't enjoy their conversations, not at all.

He thought back to Jason's worried face when he told him about his journey to the Doors, and how it almost mirrored Ethan and Alabaster's expressions. One more person to care about him, one more person to worry about leaving behind. Things were so much easier when you could die alone on the streets with no one looking for you.

There was a knock at his door, he could tell it was Alabaster. 

“Come in.” 

Alabaster’s footsteps were hesitant. 

“I’m not angry at you,” he said, sitting down on a beanbag chair that Nico stole from the recreation room. “I want you to know that.” 

“Are you going to be dramatic and say that you’re angry at yourself?” Nico replied drily. 

“No, I’m angry for you,” Alabaster frowned. “Why are you so insistent on becoming a gopher for the Olympians? You have us, are we not important enough to stay tied down to? Why go traipsing around the world and get yourself killed for people who don’t even know your name?”

“My father knows my name,” Nico said. “And why do you think that I’m not doing it for this place?” 

“We have a good defensive barrier, and we’re more hidden than Camp Halfblood, we don’t need to do anything even if the Gaea wins.” 

“You don’t. I’m not asking you to do anything,” Nico twisted the ring on his finger anxiously. “Al, I need to know that you won’t get yourself in any trouble if I die.” 

“Easy fix, don’t die. I’ve been hearing whispers, too. About the other camp, the Romans. Clovis and Lou Ellen mentioned it. That’s the camp that Jason is from, right? Let them handle this. The Olympians have two entire camps of demigods who worship them, they don’t need you. We need you.”

“And I need you, Al,” Nico leaned closer to Alabaster, oblivious to the hitch in Alabaster’s breath. “I need you to be on my side, to keep the camp under control while I keep you guys safe. Can you do that for me?” 

Alabaster looked away, “Fine.” 

“Thank you,” Nico smiled, his bright white teeth (the only healthy looking feature on his face) gleamed. “Now, isn’t that a lot easier than me strangling you with shadows?” 

..........

The campers gathered together in the rec room. Some sat on the ground, some found purchase on the beanbag chairs, every one of them was tense, as if they knew that they were about to hear some bad news. 

Ethan took out a remote and lowered a projector down (no expenses were spared in creating this camp, most of it financed by Nico’s black companion Underworld credit card, courtesy of Hades). Nico whispered, “When did you find time to create a powerpoint presentation?”

Ethan rolled his eyes, there’s always time for a powerpoint presentation. 

He clicked the control, the plain powerpoint presentation began, with a comic sans “New News: It’s Bad” appearing on the screen. 

“I’m sure that everyone’s heard the whispers already, there’s a new adversary on the rise.” 

He clicked another button, “Gaea.” 

“As most people know, Gaea is the mother of the Titans, one of the first deities in existence. The information that we have right now, courtesy of Nico, is that she is awakening and attempting to destroy Olympus. As most of us know from experience, she won’t be able to do that without extra help, haha,” Ethan tried to give a dry laugh. Some of the campers laughed along with him, others groaned. 

“You try to overthrow the divine monarchy once, and they never let you live it down,” someone in the crowd muttered. 

“Her plan is to reawaken the Giants, who can only be killed by the gods and demigods working together. Unfortunately, the gods have closed off Olympus,” Ethan continued. “Yes, Mark, you have a question?” 

A five year old demigod sitting on the lap of his older sister was holding up his hand. “Can I go to the bathroom?” 

“I-Mark, can you hold it in? You need to know this,” Ethan pinched the bridge of his nose. “No bathroom breaks until the end of the announcement, okay?”

“Mark, are you going to ask to go to the bathroom when Giants are attacking us?” Alabaster asked. 

“Hey,” his sister responded, “He has a small bladder!” 

Nico sighed, and remembered whenever he’d be called to a senate meeting when he visited New Rome. No one needed impromptu bathroom breaks there. “Mark, you can go. But get your sister to fill you in on what’s happening later, okay?”

“‘Kay, Coco,” Mark clambered down his sister and waddled to the bathroom. 

Ethan coughed, trying to get the gravitas back, but it was gone. 

“Okay, so what are we supposed to do?” Someone called out from the crowd. 

“Do we have any quests?” Someone else asked. 

“Whose side are we on?” 

“Ethan, I need to go to the bathroom, too!”

Nico gave Alabaster a glance, and gestured for him to take over. 

“Quiet, quiet!” he yelled. “We do nothing, we stay here, and continue building our activities center, shrines to our parents, and look for more demigods to bring to camp.” 

“Whose side are we on?” Someone else asked again. 

Alabaster grimaced, but he looked at Nico, whose liquid dark eyes turned on him with a quiet glare. 

“No one will be lifting a finger for this unless they want to,” he finally said, forcing down a blush when Nico looked at him approvingly. “But we can’t side with Gaea, the Giants will bring utter destruction to demigods. And I don’t imagine that she’ll be happy with us since we technically defected from her children.” 

“It’s not defecting when we’ve already lost, it’s surrendering,” someone called out. “We’re losers, not defectors!” 

“Ethan’s the defector,” Someone, Miriam, said. “He defected before we lost.”

“And you’re welcome for that, Miriam,” Ethan pointed at her. “Also, you’re welcome for the time I saved your ass from getting eaten by your sergeant in the Titan’s army. Look, we can’t ally ourselves with an army of creatures who want to eat us anymore, okay?” 

“Very bad idea,” Nico added. “Plus, summer’s in full swing and we have so many activities planned. Don’t let Gaea distract anyone from the improv classes and the Chariot Races.” 

“I wanna win the Chariot Race!” Little Mark had finished going to the bathroom and was running back to his sister’s lap. “Coco, how many more days till the races?” 

The rest of the campers’ faces melted as they watched little Mark cuddle up against his sister. He was the youngest camper there, found during the quest of punishment that the Olympian gods forced the surrendering Titan’s Army demigods to undertake after their defeat. Most of them carried a mark, a scar, some sort of disfigurement from that harrowing quest that Olympus decreed necessary. 

Alabaster looked up at Nico’s tired face, and remembered him pushing out from behind Hades’ shadow to stand in front of them, putting himself between the wrath of Zeus and the scared and injured demigods that were about to be annihilated. A quest, he’d asked of Zeus. Some journey of redemption, just like the one that Heracles had when he committed a grave error. He was a war hero who lost the chance at any honor for himself because he chose to throw his lot in with the losers. 

All because of Percy Jackson, Alabaster thought bitterly. Because “Percy would’ve wanted amnesty.” He hated the fact that he had to thank Percy Jackson for his life now. He hated the fact that Nico would consider this camp “Percy Jackson’s legacy,” instead of Nico’s own legacy that he almost killed himself for. Alabaster wished that Percy Jackson was alive so that he could show him exactly what he thought of his hypocritical ass. 

“I’m going to be heading to the Underworld to find the Doors of Death,” Nico announced. “No one is allowed to follow me. If Camp Halfblood comes here to ask for help, let them in and show them hospitality, but I’ll trust that you all follow your judgment on whether or not to help out. But no one is allowed to aid Gaea or ally with any of the Giants, capisce?” 

The campers that joined later or were from Camp Halfblood originally said “aye” enthusiastically. Ethan nodded, leading to more campers saying “aye.” Alabaster looked like he was swallowing a lemon, but he nodded, and his friends joined in as well. 

Nico sighed in relief. “Good, now. Meeting adjourned.” 

#nico di angelo #alabaster torrington #ethan nakamura #chthonian au #wip #jasico #if you squint #nico has a crush guys he's just too focused on other stuff as well #also slight onesided #nicobaster #sorry alabaster #pjo #hoo #percy jackson and the olympians #heroes of olympus

[localfraudster]

My friend wanted me to write a pjo/hoo (especially Son of Magic) and a vtk crossover. I might write it in the future, but I'm not sure.

I dont know how the fuck it will go but they wanted the idiot trio attacking Alabaster the moment he sets foot inside the Gadam vilzone because of a 'my gut tells me he's another psyker'. Like ermm, he's probably an extremely traumatised demigod.

Like some funny interactions I can see happening is basically just:

Alabaster: ...

Black Hand: Why is your name a rock?

Alabaster: How about I turn you into a rock.

Black Hand: Bring it on! *he promptly gets turned into a rock whilst Crush and Double Blade stares*

*Rick sees Percy slay a monster/villain with water*

Rick: You should become a psyker!

Percy: I'll think about it...

*Dr. Claymore explaining theories about death to an audience of villains*

*Moros and Cassian staring at eachother as Cassian got reincarnated whilst Alabaster shaking their head at them*

My friend had a bunch of ideas about this AU so I'm going to share it:

Demigods could become psykers or villains if they wanted to.

Demigods are not known about by regular mortals (psykers, civilians, villains) just like in the pjo verse

Villains who are demigods can only access their godly powers in their civilian form.

Psykers and villains are just regular mortals; they can't see through the mist unless they could / they were a demigod.

People probably consider the gods fake (I mean they already do but-)

Young demigods who weren't affiliated with Titan Army or Camp Half-Blood tended to go to Lampas or vilzones for protection from monsters.

Driver is a son of Hepheastus. No argument.

Moros is a demigod. No clue who his godly parent is but he's a demigod.

Yuri and Gangu/Cassian are a legacy of Minerva whilst Cassian Lee was a child of Athena.

Rose Tail and Dark Star are children of Aphrodite.

Winterbell is blessed by nature spirits.

Sometimes, psykers and demigods gets confused for one another, so there could be a random psyker in the Titan Army whilst a demigod could accidentally be brought to Lampas without their consent.

This idea probably doesn't make sense but I think it's a fun idea to play around with.

#villain to kill #alabaster torrington #pjo #villaintokill #pjo hoo toa #vtk

[mrmagnetwgd]

The second piece after the Hall of Gods is complete! I'll be honest, I mostly used this as colour theory practice but the story was in my mind near constantly so without further ado...

Background that only some of you care about but I promised to provide after the Hall of Gods:

Eret doesn't remember Foolish- doesn't recognize the man who tells stories of their past and doesn't flinch away from an alabaster gaze. To be fair, Eret hardly recognizes themself anymore.

They've been a lot of things as far as they /can/ recall: a soldier, a traitor, a king-- but now they're simply a person. The museum curator of the SMP and all it's history. It's how she had found the statues that now round the large central chamber of their museum. She recognizes them as the totem's work now, having seen so much of it as of late. Even so, he can't be quiet sure they see the resemblance between the marble figure they had created and themself (even if something in the back of their mind screamed to remember). Eret didn't remember being a god. She wasn't even sure she would have wanted to be one.

For now though being a person, just "Eret", was good enough for them.

Foolish recognized Eret on sight, heart and soul reaching out to their oldest companion, the one he had feared he lost to him. True, they had changed quite a bit but the god would know them anywhere.

He doesn't mind the changes and he takes their apparent amnesia in stride. Memory is a fickle thing, especially for those who lived as long as they have.

He will be honest in saying that his sculptural depiction has been a bit grandiose when compared to it's inspiration but that was how he had always seen her and in their absence that mental image had only solidified. As a god, Eret had always been larger than life. Radiant and unapologetic in a way she had lost somewhere during their time apart.

Perhaps that was why when they sketched them he couldn't bring himself to add the glasses they used to hide their eyes. Perhaps that was why his art strayed back to the time of lavish outfits and a halo of stars.

And if the changes made his model pause, brow scrunched up as if trying to recall something just out of reach, he didn't mention it.

If certain pieces of art he created prompted familiar quips and a closeness he had missed for far too long, then it was worth drawing from memory...

#digital aritst #dsmp fanart #procreate #dsmp #eret #eret fanart #digital painting #eret art #eternal duo #dsmp foolish #foolish fanart #eternal duo fanart #ficlet #art based ficlet #fanart

[wutheringmights]

I finished The Stone Sky by N.K. Jemisin last night, then spent all of today digesting it. I really needed time to figure out how I feel about this book, nonetheless the Broken Earth trilogy.

As a whole, I like this series. My biggest praise will always go to the relationship between Essun and Nassun. That Essun, a woman defined by her motherhood, was a terrible mother to her daughter, and that her daughter in turn found solace in her mother's old abuser, is fascinating. It's insane. I would read a hundred books about them.

But even though the series is about Essun and Nassun, it's so just... not. I've complained before that the intricate world building is as fascinating as it is distracting. The narrative is always scrambling to explain something new, so much so that the characters aren't allowed to interact as much as they should.

I'm not even just talking about Essun and Nassun. Tonkee was wasted. She was first introduced in the very first book, and she was very cool and interesting. I kept waiting for the reason why Tonkee is in this story beyond a few lines of needed exposition. But after the first book, she stops being important.

Outside of characters like Schaffa, Hoa, and Alabaster, I didn't really care or know any of the other characters in the large cast. In theory, I'm supposed to have feelings about Lerna and Ykka, but... no. They served a function. And that's it.

The plot of this series just baffles me. Why did we spend so much time with Castrima? Why did Nassun have to keep finding excuses to not go after Essun? Why was this three books? This could have been duology! If I really wanted to, I could put on a tin foil hat and claim that someone outside Jemisin forced her to turn a two-book plot into a trilogy. I'm just utterly baffled that someone would let this story meander like this.

All my griping aside, I don't hate this series. I like it a lot, but on a intellectual scale.

This book is filled with fascinating observations about our society. I bet someone who knows more about the neo slave narratives of the 20th century would be able to write a killer paper on how this series ruminates on the legacy of authors like Butler and Morrison.

I like all of the complicated characters, how they defy dichotomies like good vs evil. Nassun is one hell of a character. I want to study her. I want more of her.

I don't want to pit two bad bitches against each other, but I can't help but compare this series to R.F. Kuang's The Poppy War trilogy. They have little in common, but they are both dark fantasy series I read this year, so bear with me.

The more distance I put between myself and Kuang, the more I struggle with how simplistic her stories can be at times. She doesn't leave a lot of room for interpretation or for the reader to introduce their own feelings to the mix. If you scrape off the overt violence, it surprisingly simple. It's a series that doesn't require a whole lot of input from the reader. But, the plot has fantastic momentum. Each book by itself is a joy to read.

Jemisin embraces uncertainty far more. There are no clear answers. The reader meets these characters and are forced to come to their own conclusions about them. Everything from its world to its themes gets more complex the more thought you put into them. The book demands you think about it. But, each book is kind of a slog. I always had to force myself to pick it up and read the next part. I never regretted doing so, but I also never really fell in love with the series the way I wanted to.

This is a case where I can say that a series is objectively excellent, but not really for me. I'm glad I read them all and I'm going to continue diving deeper into Jemisin's books. But I am so very glad to get the Broken Earth trilogy off my plate.

I also want to talk about the acknowledgements at the end of the book. In it, Jemisin explains that she wrote the trilogy while caring for her sick mother, who died before the last book was finished. I wish I got this context sooner. As Jemisin says, the trilogy is inadvertently an exploration of motherhood and her grappling with her mother's death.

There were a few scenes in this book in particular where I felt her experiences and thoughts echoed my own. I'm not a Hugo Award winning author, but I did notice that after my mother died a few years ago, everything I wrote was about her, even when it wasn't.

"Even that part where--?" Yes, even that. Even now I'm still writing about her and my relationship with her, and in many ways that are and aren't painfully obvious.

It was just an interesting thing to read when her death anniversary just past.

(Do me a favor and don't give me any more condolences. I really don't need them, and I would like to not regret adding that little tidbit about myself to this reflection.)

#me rambling #me reading #the stone sky #the broken earth trilogu #the broken earth #nk jemisin #books #bookblr

[catcas22]

Hey, do you have any headcanons / theory from how a single village that exists in Weeping Peninsula is afflicted by Frenzy whereas very coincidentally Irina (who is connected with Hyetta of course) is from there too? My friend Val also investigated on Hyettas quest by killing Edgar before as much as talking to Irina, and turns out later Shabriri Grape appears on his place in the Castle Morne anyways, so if anything maybe bro was doomed no matter what 🤔 I am just not sure what came first - the village being afflicted and this family catching the "sickness", or Irina having a weird evil twin and infecting it herself hfhghghv There is a cut content note about Shabriri mentioning that he went to die (physically) IN Weeping Peninsula, so there is that too. Wanted to hear your ideas if you have them?

Thanks for the ask! Theory below the cut.

A few notes on the Ailing Village, just to see what info is available at first glance.

The church there is called the Callu Baptismal Church. Despite the ever-present religious imagery, I don't think baptism is referenced anywhere else in-game.

The Flame of Frenzy incantation is found there. The description doesn't really tell us anything specific, instead serving as the player's first basic introduction to the FF.

Incantation originating from the maddening Three Fingers.

Causes the yellow flame of frenzy to burst forth from the caster's eyes. Charging increases the range of the burst.

The flame of frenzy deals damage and causes buildup of madness. This incantation also causes buildup of madness in the caster and is only effective against Tarnished.

We also find the Flame Crest wooden shield. The wording of the description suggests to me that the village didn't just fall to Frenzy overnight -- instead, whether imposed or by choice, the village functioned as something of a leper colony. Alternatively, the corruption process was slow enough that the villagers had the presence of mind to try to warn off others who might have come looking for them.

A tall, medium-sized wooden shield. Light for its size, and easy to handle. Carried by soldiers of the village that is afflicted by frenzy.

The yellow flame is the symbol of the affliction, serving as a warning to those who might approach the village.

There is a Lesser Alabaster Lord quite close by. I'm not sure what to make of this.

I've posted a theory before detailing why I believe that Hyetta is A) one of Irena's past lives, and B) Vyke's maiden. I'll post a link below, along with the portions relevant here.

"Let’s start with the Shield of the Guilty description."

"Shield made to venerate a maiden whose eyes were crushed by Briars of Sin before being reborn in these lands."

"Given it’s placement on the Weeping Peninsula, we seem to be meant to assume that the maiden in question is Irina. According to her dialogue, her eyes have been weak since birth. After her revival (?) as Hyetta, she says the same, her blindness was a congenital condition, not the result of an illness or injury. Based on the Dung Eater’s questline, we know that killing someone in a specific way (or tampering with the body after death) can inflict a curse that persists into the next life."

... "Vyke and Hyetta are ambushed at the Church of Inhibition -- or, if you want to get really tragic, Vyke sent her away after his meeting with the Three Fingers so that she would not be incriminated by her association with him, only for the Confessors to hunt her down anyway."

"The Confessors execute Hyetta via the Briars of Sin. Vyke proceeds to lose his shit so hard that an echo of his rage (the berserker shade) still guards the church centuries after. For the first time, he gives in to the Flame of Frenzy."

There are three in-game settlements afflicted with the FF -- The Ailing Village, the Frenzied Flame Village, and the Yelough Anix Ruins. I'm not even going to touch the Yelough Anix (pretty sure "Anix" is a typo, but if it has some meaning I'm not aware of please share), but we know that the Frenzied Flame Village was the site of a meltdown by a host of the FF.

Although I can't prove that the Frenzied Flame Village wasn't afflicted prior to Vyke's meltdown, it would make sense if the village were infected by said event. I don't have enough proof to establish that a pattern (again, I have no idea who could have infected the Yelough Anix), but it's at least plausible that the Ailing Village was infected by contact with FF host such as Vyke.

There's also the possibility that Edgar was to blame. Note the Banished Knight's Halberd description:

A finely-crafted halberd intricately engraved with an ancient motif.

Given to knights who, whether by misfortune or misdeed, were forced to abandon their homes.

Most of these knights were sent to the fringes, where they were forced to start anew with only despair for company.

Edgar also seems to parallel the Hero of Morne. Grafted Blade Greatsword description:

The storied sword of Castle Morne. A revenger's weapon, it is burdened with oceans of anger and regret.

A lone surviving champion from a country now vanished was so determined to continue fighting that he claimed the swords of an entire clan of warriors.

When I first saw your ask, I though that Hyetta/Irina might have been patient zero. But taking all this together, I have a different proposal. I think the Hero of Morne might have fallen to Frenzy.

From the Sword Monument outside Castle Morne:

The siege of Castle Morne A lone hero fights for his vengeance Only to fall at the hand of Lord Godfrey.

The sole survivor of another of the Golden Order's genocides, the Hero would have been a prime candidate to fall to despair, and thus to Frenzy. The use of the archaic word "revenger" in the Grafted Blade Greatsword's description seems to be drawing a deliberate parallel to Edgar, who meets his end in the Revenger's Shack.

Like Vyke, the Hero might have sought out the FF in order to gain the power to save those he loved, only to despair when he lost them anyway. Or perhaps like Edgar, he succumbed to mindless hate after losing everyone he cared for, with no reason to go on beyond his vengeance. Due to its location just beyond Morne's walls, the Ailing Village could have easily been infected by the "fallout" from the Hero's final battle.

(One more note: when fought in the Lord Contender's Evergaol, Vyke uses the Storm Assault ash of war.

Storm Assault: One of the skills that channel the tempests of Stormveil. Leap forward through surrounding storm winds and thrust armament downward. The attack will produce more storm winds at the point of impact.

We already knew that Vyke was a member of the Dragon Cult, and thus one of Godwyn's knights. But this skill might also link him to Godfrey, the war against the Storm Lord, and the early conquest of Limgrave.

This is more a headcanon than a theory, but it would be a wonderful bit of narrative resonance if Vyke fought under Godfrey during the Siege of Morne and was there to witness the Hero's Frenzied last stand.)

Thanks for the ask! I learned a lot!

#elden ring #answered asks #elden ring theory #festering fingerprint vyke #edgar the revenger #lightseeker hyetta #irina of morne #hero of morne

[blueiskewl]

Underground Tunnel Found Beneath Egyptian Temple May Lead to Cleopatra

The Egyptian Ministry of Tourism and Antiquities have announced the incredible discovery of a rock-cut tunnel deep below ground in the area of the Taposiris Magna Temple, west of Alexandria in Egypt. The massive tunnel, which has been described as a ‘geometric miracle’ stretches over 1,300 meters (4,265 feet). The area has been under investigation in the search for the long-lost tomb of Queen Cleopatra .

The tunnel was discovered 13 meters (43 feet) underground by the Egyptian Dominican archaeological mission of the University of San Domingo, headed by Dr. Kathleen Martinez. During the excavations and archaeological survey of the tunnel a number of ceramic vessels and pots were found under mud sediment, as well as a rectangular block of limestone. Two heads made of alabaster were also found near the temple, one of which dates to the Ptolemaic period.

Part of the tunnel was found to be submerged underwater and this supports the theory that foundations of the Taposiris Magna Temple are also underwater. At least 23 earthquakes hit the Egyptian coast between 320 and 1303 AD, which would explain the collapse and submergence of part of the Taposiris Magna Temple.

The architectural design of the newly discovered tunnel resembles the magnificent Tunnel of Eupalinos on the Greek Island of Samos, which is considered one of the most important engineering achievements of the Classical world.

Taposiris Magna, The Great Tomb of Osiris

Taposiris Magna, which is a name meaning “great tomb of Osiris”, is an ancient city established by the pharaoh Ptolemy II between 280 and 270 BC. After Alexander the Great conquered Egypt in 332 BC and established Alexandria, the city of Taposiris Magna became a center for the religious festival of Khoiak. The Khoiak festival revolves around the legend of the god Osiris, who was murdered by his brother Seth, and revived by his sister-wife Isis, who conceived their son Horus.

The temple at Taposiris Magna was dedicated to Osiris, who was worshipped by Greek leaders in Egypt who honored the old traditions.

The Final Resting Place of Cleopatra?

For the past 14 years, Dr. Kathleen Martínez has been the head of excavations at Taposiris Magna. The discoveries made during that time have made her more and more certain that she is close to the long-lost tomb of Cleopatra VII and her lover Mark Antony . The famous ancient Egyptian queen’s proposed ties to the site has brought it to international headlines as new and intriguing finds and documentaries are made about the site every few years.

There have been many notable discoveries during the excavations. For example, in 2010, a huge headless granite statue of a Ptolemaic king was unearthed. Dr. Zahi Hawass believes that it probably belonged to Ptolemy IV and was dedicated to the god Osiris, stressing the link between the ancient site and the well-known ancient Egyptian god. Martinez said that the excavations have also found a beautiful statue head of Cleopatra, along with 22 coins bearing her image.

Behind the temple, a necropolis was discovered, containing many Greco-Roman style mummies who were buried with their faces turned towards the temple. This means it is likely the temple contained the burial of a significant royal personality, like Cleopatra.

Could the newly found underground tunnel lead archaeologists closer towards the tomb of Cleopatra and Mark Antony? Only time will tell!

By Joanna Gillan.

#Underground Tunnel Found Beneath Egyptian Temple May Lead to Cleopatra #Taposiris Magna Temple #Dr. Kathleen Martinez #Taposiris Magna #The Great Tomb of Osiris #Mark Anthony #archeology #archeolgst #ancient artifacts #history #history news #ancient history #ancient civilizations #ancient egypt #egyptian history

[larrythefloridaman]

Rewatch notes, Dr. Order arc edition! My notes are getting longer and longer as the story gets denser. I fear what comes when we start hitting The Big Ones. Pray for me. These are just notes for 15 and gaiden 2, and this post will be updated as i make my way through.

CPUK15. goggle……………

Representing Calibur, Google, the green roy! Google being created from the base of Bing after she lost to him last tournament 'with Bing's weaknesses buffed out,' is established out the gate as a strong local theory. Comona believes in Google's potential, praising his pedigree and ability to analyze data and general knowledge base about combat, being that he's a search engine.

Cash Money, Instajennifer! Instajen is on a quest to become the biggest influencer on the planet, and film a sponsored makeup tutorial between her matches. Here to show up and show off. She will beat you to death and take a selfie with your corpse.

Team Cones, the Red Shadow. A funny prankster type. A greninja with the prankster ability. Puts whoopee cushions on benches and replaces sugar packets with salt and such.

Team Clutch, Alabaster Uppercut <3 funny punch man

Team Chonk, in his first solo debut since death, The Gruuuuuunk, back and better than ever! Comona: "im going to kiss home md on the mouth for bringing him back." Ryan: "its what he deserves."

Team Charm, described here as a team of positivity and niceness and such rather than the usual very explicit do-gooder description, represented by Prism. Hi prism. here to right crimson's wrongs :)

Team Cracken, Patchman! The pac is back. Man of the earth.

Team Cross, a celebration of all things crossover, today we have the one the only Miles Edgeworth. Or so he claims.

Exhibition match, Minecraft Steve vs. Therapuppy! Guess steve didnt get kicked out like i thought, forgot this match happened. I forgot a lot of exhibition matches. Therapuppy makes simple work of him.

TWOOOOOOO bamamas

Google vs. Prism. First match of the night. Comona thinks Prism has an edge in this match by her command of her lil creatures, but based on bing's performance and what hes heard about Goog being more reliable, Goog won't be going down without a fight. Prism lays down a LOT of damage very quickly but Goog takes first stock with a good edgeguard and dashdances on her for good measure. Commentators note Google is very different from bing in terms of combat behavior- strong reliable momentum and much less reliant on comeback factor. Google gets good damage on her and spikes her with a viciousness for the second stock before prism can even take his first. Google doesnt want to let you live past 70%. Prism manages to take it to last stock with some careful comboing. Google takes round one after a nailbiting match.

Ryan: "Spoiler Alert, can't wait for the round three." Comona: "you say that as though you know its already going to happen." Ryan, smugly: "hmmmmm."

They discuss how Google does his best taking stocks as early as possible, when he's fighting from a position where he doesn't have to be afraid to commit to an action, and so if Prism can survive until Google starts getting nervous, she can win. Prism has advantage on the second match stage, and makes quick work to combo him to death, dragging him down to last stock before she even has 50% on her second. Google is trying So hard to spike her and its not working. Prism baits google offstage at just the wrong time and he SDs, using up his jumps and upsmash trying to make it back up to the stage as it moves upwards away from them, Prism's squirtle able to make it back where he can't. The prophesied third round comes and Prism keeps firm control of the stage, losing one stock but taking all three of google's, the last stock with a vicious spike to match the one Google landed on her in their first match, sending Google to Loser's.

Alabaster vs. Red Shadow. Commentators comment on the big color theme going on at the moment. Ryan: "fortunately none of them are crimson specifically." Comona: "just regular ol red." Ryan: "just normal red. crimson is gone." lol. lmao. yeah he sure is

This match is so silly-goofy. Red Shadow a pride and joy of team cones with regard to getting funny with it. Goes stock for stock, until the Red Shadow dominates the last stock with a viciousness. Hes getting silly with it but he still doesn't want to lose to Al. Game 2 Alabaster is taking things more seriously too, the commentators plead with him to remeber who he is, to not lose sight of it, and hes doing good, aaaaaand he sds right on time for it to be a last stock situation. and then shortly after Al chokes again. Ryan: "now he's gonna have to fight Google in losers, thats not gonna be fun for him!" Lives are about to be changed 👍

Team Clutch and Team Cones are described as having an interesting specific sort of rivalry- Salt of the Earth training buffs and tricksy bitches.

The Gruuuuuunk vs. Patchman. Patchman is going to lose and the commentators know it. Grunk takes round one as predicted. Patchman did better than expected but the grunk cant be stopped. Patch manages to take first stock in the second round but, as predicted, the Grunk aint losing this one.

'Miles Edgeworth' vs. Instajennifer. Weird ass matchup. Commentators have nothing to say about it its weird. The commentators DO comment on how odd Miles' general willingness to scrap is. Comona comments on how weird it is that 'Edgeworth's' using some sword from the evidence room. Ryan points out how illegal that is "but its fine." Instajen is parrying for the clout. She was in the lead for a wild amount of time before 'miles' took it. Instajen's taunts are tiktok dances. 'Miles' is being Cruel in the second round. I do not know how jen took round 2 but it did piss 'edgeworth' off enough to threestock in round 3. Instajennifer #autopsyreport

Ryan: "I dont know if we're gonna have a fun character arc this week like we did last but we've got plenty of fun matches on hand regardless." He says during a break, immediately before Google vs Alabaster,

Google, a creation made to be perfect but already in losers bracket vs Alabaster, a guy who's never made it past 5th place but intends to make a name for himself regardless. Comona and Ryan discuss the idea of doing a 'worst of the worst' tournament featuring the most shameful, embarrassingly bad fighters immediately after introducing Al. Mean to him. Not wrong but mean to him. Anyway theres no faith in Al's chances against goog. Goog's peeved and has something to Prove. This desperateness to prove himself makes him easier to rattle, and Al does pretty damn good right up until google fucking Gets him at the end.

Comona says what ive been thinking since season one and forgot they said, that being. Again. Al is very strong hes just not up to par with insane battle freaks. Hes yamcha or tien or krillin hes good! Hes good as fuck! he just cant fucking keep up with superhumans! Hes a star member of team clutch not for his record, but for his spirit. Al takes stock one in round 2 with Pinball Variation. They're trading blows and it's all very anime. Al keeps a lead for a while in the second match until Google pinballs his ass right back and then takes his last stock at 200%.

Field report: Al laughs off his loss with a respectful thumbs up and starts to walks away. Google: "I don't GET IT. You always come back for more despite the fact you've never put up a performance befitting that of a competitor- what brings you BACK, alabaster uppercut?" Alabaster: "take a look around, google. Take a look around this great world we live in. Maybe then you'll see why I keep coming back." iconic moments in kerfuffle history. Comona's goog voice is so funny its so growly and anime-arrogant compared to what Holly does with him later that sticks, the whole 'a bit odd and softspoken but fiery' vibe he gets later

Google, starting to have his identity crisis: "do you think i was born yesterday?! I mean, it was last week, technically…" and then gets real quiet. 

Patchman vs Instajen. Comona anticipates a long set. CPUK provides coca cola as refreshments to workers like the social media interns who are not allowed to leave their desk while a tournaments running. and if you want pepsi theyre giving you coke and you have to be okay with that. you have to. Patchman is described as one of the more particularly intelligent salt of the earth types here

Patchman dominates a bit first match but, instajen, always dedicated to style, after taking patch's first stock, almost zero-to-death's the second. Doesn't pull out a win though. Ryan: "I will point out that in this tournament every fighter except Alabaster Uppercut has won a game. F." Second match is pretty close and goes to instajen with a decisive stomp Ryan says her stans would be envious of. Third match goes pretty similar, sending patchman home downtrod and disappointed.

Corn is an instajen stan. and freaked out about her dad getting to meet her in bracket. funny to me.

Prism vs. The Red Shadow. :) prism is built different and is not intimidated by some romhack'd red greninja. Red shadow canonically laughs like tim curry pennywise. Prism fights vicious and red shadow struggles hard to find a kill. Prism wins match one and she's white woman smiling at a glaring Red Shadow. The Red Shadow is 3-stocked on Dracula's Castle and becomes The Prismatic Shadow, after Prism has a little conversation with him :)

Ryan: "he's joined the prism club." Comona: "yeah, prism has that effect on people. I wonder if this means he'll- not FULLY take a step back from, still team cones, right-? But try to keep the prankster mischief to more of the tactical use rather than trying to be tricky at every turn." Ryan: "less about being unexpected, and more about being unexpected EFFECTIVELY." Comona: "when you can expect the unexpected its not really unexpected anymore." :)

The Grunk vs. 'Miles Edgeworth!' Pikachu weight. Goes very very close, but the grunk keeps a strong lead until last stock of the first match where 'Miles' takes it. 'Miles Edgeworth' lives in northern crater. Ryan: "where was this sauce when we actually introduced sephiroth?" Comona: "maybe its because its red sephiroth?" Ryan: "maybe. its that crimson magic*. *not actual crimson." Next match progresses much more evenly, with miles taking the lead at stock two. The Grunk pulls out the win in the end though, as predicted, and does so for the last match as well.

Chat Member: "Miles was the prosecutor in the Grunk's murder trial before he got revived and he's salty because he didn't get paid because the trial was canceled when The Grunk came back." The commentators laugh and roll with it, canonizing it. Ryan: "and the defendant was just an interdimensional demon! Whatever." Okay I just want to pick this scenario apart for a second because holy god its so. Its just so. Every time i remember this and that the Grunk's death was an accident i lose it all over again. Captain Crimson just standing over the Grunk's crimson-melted corpse while Val and Crimson do that one scene from one tree hill people animate their morally bankrupt ocs to (crimson, realizing uncomfortably its taking a weirdly long time for the grunk to arise anew as a Cool Evil Corrupted Beast: "well. I guess he could be dead by now." While Valentine panics about a body in a soundstage, HIS SOUNDSTAGE,) in his head. Captain Crimson got dragged into detention and might've plead oopsie daisies. The Grunk presumably canceled his own murder trial and pursued no other charges??? Valentine is the only person in this scenario probably having a relatively normal emotional reaction to being made an accomplice to manslaughter because this whole thing is a goof and a bit. Valentine brings up very pointedly the grunk's own murder charges in cpuk23, presumably either shortly before or after learning they're all fictional characters given its around this time he starts more officially becoming a full part of staff and not just an event emcee, and is understandably Fucking Stunned by Grunk's 'wheres my trophy?' response. Crimson, who has known this is comedic fiction the whole time but doesn't tell anyone that because it would be 'more trouble than its worth', as of CPUK Orange, does not appear to understand why his manslaughter accomplice doesnt want to hang out anymore when he's like, pretty sure there were no LASTING consequences. its all, just SO MUCH,

'Miles edgeworth' vs. Google. Ryan: "imagine trying to sue google." Googles described as having kind of an introspective air about him, thinking on his conversation with Al. Google SD's first stock, and never quite gets the momentum going enough to manage more than one kill, 'miles' capitalizing on his distraction. Comona: "somethings fried his circuits a bit." Ryan: "somethings Up with google." Comona: "definitely not feeling the same as he was at the start."

Miles is taunting him. "Fool. You consider yourself to be an antagonary force? You're such a fool to think so- you don't even have the power to take down someone like myself! After all, who else have you lost against- that Prism fellow? Please. If you wish to be an antagonist, and see the world as truly dark, you have so much to go. Dr. Order created you to be the perfect being- and look at you. You're nothing. Trash." Google: "Listen… here, 'Miles.' I was made to be the Ultimate Fighter. I was made to win. But now I'm realizing- theres more to this than winning, theres more to this than kicking your ass! But thats not going to stop me!" And round 2 commences.

Comona: "are we even sure this is miles edgeworth-? I know he can be cold but-" this thought is interrupted by some Sick Plays. 'Miles' does some serious damage to goog, but goog takes first stock and Fast. 'Miles' takes it right back. Goog is getting fiery and 'Miles' stays cool under pressure. Ryan and Comona describe how quickly Goog's flipped from antagonism in his match with Al to more antiheroic behavior. The match is fast and frenetic and Google just barely survives offstage and manages to take 'Miles' last stock. 'Miles': "Finally acting like the competitor you're supposed to be." Goog is silent. They go to warioware. Goog demolishes the first stock. Miles Edgeworth has a bad history with elevators. Goog keeps a firm two-stock lead and completes the win. 'Miles,' after losing, pulls out a phone: "Doctor? The deed is done." And walks out.

Miles picked that stage. Miles Edgeworth Would Never Set Foot In An Elevator. Thats Not Edgeworth. Thats just sephiroth with a red coat.

Google shows a 'return to form' with that match, by the commentators observation.

Prismatic Shadow vs. Instajen. If instajen wins shes gotten farther than the person who three-stocked her. Instajen fumbles round one hard and shadow takes it. Instajen zero to deaths shadow for the first stock of round 2. Instajen's the kind of person that doesn't take flops hard, Instajen: "just make another post girl. Just make another post." Instajen pulls out a win for round two, taking it to game 3.

FUCK spectrum. Commentators are venting about the internet provider. Comona: "the only spectrum I care about is the spectrum of colors these fighters bring to the stage. Round three!" The shadow drops stocks way too early, and ultimately Jen takes it.

Prism vs. The Gruuuuuuunk, winners finals. The connection starts getting Crunchy and Prism loses her first stock Very early. Grunk bodyblocks her off the ledge to take stocks twice, and the third Prism loses all on her own as frames continue to drop. A chat member suggests shes throwing on purpose because she wants to meet Instajennifer in losers. Second Round is on Prism Tower, PURE homecourt pick, but to the Grunk, Everywhere is home, and it doesnt take long before he crushes Prism's first stock. Prism takes the lead before last stock, but again as the frames are dropping, she fails to recover. She do be performing worse when the connection is weak. 15 is sliced into two vods due to technical difficulties.

Ryan: "spectrum iiiis dead. im killing spectrum personally, actually. Spectrum is the final boss of CPU Kerfuffle. The crimson is spectrum." All of these statements are hilarious in their own ways with time

Google vs. Instajennifer! Insta fumbles round one pretty hard. Ryan: "round one goes to google in a heartbeat of a match! I dont know what that means." Chat suggests the stage was bad for jen because it was a bad environment for selfies and such. Round 2 gets off to a better start for Jen, the two of them dancing around eachother and Jen landing her smash attacks much better, and this match looks considerably more even, but goog still takes it, beating Insta 2-0. She takes one more selfie in front of the stadium and makes her exit.

Goog vs. Prism- the runback. Google doesn't do too hot against Prism's charizard in particular, losing two stocks before taking one of hers. Google's so off his game at this point and cannot seem to find an opening against her. Prism seems to favor her Charizard, Fuschia, somewhat, throwing out flare blitzes like candy, taking first match. Goog's composure between his and Prism's first set and the runback has changed dramatically- the first angry, standoffish, but this time, he's laughing off his loss. Chat Member: "hes reading the results page for how to beat Prism." 

Prism keeps a lead on Goog throughout their second match as well. Ryan: "if im google, im going in on this second match. Granted, I'm not Google. Maybe he knows something I dont." :)

Google, slowly standing up after getting 2-0'd by Prism: "...huh. Thanks Alabaster." And he walks out. Ryan: "not sure how well thats gonna go over with Dr. Order, but I guess we'll see."

Grand Finals! Grunk vs. Prism again. Ryan points out how hard Prism threw in their last match, so anything's possible here. He suggests that maybe the reason she threw was wanting to see google again for some reason, but he's not sure. She sure did take both his sets.

Squid Jenny's investigation of 'miles edgeworth's' identity is still ongoing, but its looking like he IS in fact sephiroth from sephiroth- and while saying this ryan gets a dm from sephiroth asking if there's a purpose for followers only chat.

Grunk and Prism on Pictochat, Prism loses first stock before the Grunk even has 40% and Prism's Ivysaur comes charging out in defense of their funny turtle friend. Perhaps Prism's pokemon do have personalities and feelings and such; she just ignores them because they're tools and extensions of her as a fighter. Would make sense. Prism manages to put damage on the grunk fast enough to take his first stock before he puts much on her second, but the Grunk takes her second stock with a viciousness and her third with a footstool.

Thank you Sephiroth For The Follow!

Round 2: Pokemon Stadium. Funny lizart fight. Grunk SDs, but takes Prism's first stock right back pretty quickly. They scrap, Fuschia and Grunk fuckin. Beam struggle with their fire breath before Prism finishes Grunk's second stock with a flare blitz. Last stock is pretty even right up until Prism pulls out Viridian and Grunk sends her straight to hell. The Grunk is our First Place Winner of CPUK 15! The Grunk's feeling the thrill for combat is extra special now after he spent a bit being dead. The Grunk only lost one match the whole tournament to miles. came back Strong.

Title Match! Ryan: "imagine dying and coming back just to become champion. Absolute zombie madman. Love him." Grunk vs. Captain Valentine! All things considered? Pretty awkward. There is no comment made on it before match start, however. Capn Val always a people pleaser, keeps it stylish, keeps it even, keeps it a show. Ryan: "I wonder if Captain Valentine's ever faced the Grunk- back when he was Captain Crimson, I know, but I wonder if any of those memories were retained from the experience." Does that happen? Does getting possessed by Crimson fuck with your memory? Do crimson'd bitches got partial amnesia? It doesn't seem like it with his other hosts, and Val's characterized later as just. Really Not Wanting To Talk About It with regard to the whole Crimson debacle so it honestly wouldnt stun me if he lied about not having much memory of the whole ordeal to. Again. Avoid Talking About It.

Last stock situation. Chat: "Wasn't Val kinda the one to kill him?" Ryan: "well, it was the crimson specifically, not sure if he was the one it was possessing at the time but it was, again, the Crimson specifically." Huh. I guess mayhaps Val Could've been the one in control of his body when appraising the potential candidates for moving forward with the distaste for ICEE and Dadondorf, while Crimson himself was off elsewhere doing a Corruption, in theory. when he's not in crimsonaut specifically and healthy enough to manifest physically he Can operate separate from a host, after all. Buuuuuut, the Grunk seems to be not particularly happy with or fond of Val- described as being particularly irritated with his loss to Val in this championship match but walking off reminding himself that 'at least hes not Dead this time,' which i think is. Strong enough evidence for me that Val was Physically Present for and Part Of that interaction. oofa doofa

After a chat member asks Ryan to stall for time while they finish their fanart, ryan pulls up a grudge match he'd meant to do earlier and forgotten- Outside the arena. Squid Jenny's catching a live feed. Google shouts for someone to come out, because he knows they're watching. And, out from a bush, Dr. Order appears. Order, who apparently either wasn't watching or is checking to see if he'll lie: "so. did you succeed?" Google, laughing: "you think it's all about winning, huh?" Order: "you were supposed to win the tournament and become the champion." Google: "yeah, well, I didn't. What the hell are you gonna do about it?" And so the match begins. Order takes first stock and Fast, but google puts on damage real fast too, uppercutting her AND sending her soccer ball back at her at the same time for a very funny series of hits. funny ball classic. 

Goog takes her second stock before she can take his, but she takes it to even last stocks shortly after, but Order cant put damage on as fast as goog does and takes it. Google: "I'm done with you." Order: "Good! I don't want losers on my side." And the live feed cuts. Ryan: "soooooo. Google might need therapy. But that's okay, that's what therapuppy's for."

Its gaiden time bitch!!!! This ones gonna be fuuuuuun to make notes for what with the whole point of Gaidens being expanding on The Lore.

Order offered Comona a pastrami bagel sandwich from the 'concession stand' (the fridge.) Ryan Does Not Trust The Food Here. They're recording live from the labordertory for, not a kerfuffle proper, but an inhouse tournament. The commentators were invited both to keep things entertaining, and show off her fearsome creations to the world.

Ryan: "Dr. Order's got one goal- well, a lot of goals but the main thing right now is that she wants to create the ultimate fighter, a being capable of winning CPU Kerfuffle." 16 person single elimination tournament, because Order's got a lot of bastards to evaluate and she doesn't tolerate losers. She wouldn't let her champion be someone who'd proven themself capable of failing.

Order, in order to set up this tournament, set off a 'biological amber alert,' placed in every one of her creations' bodies that recalls them to the lab. Ryan: "not ALL of the creations answered the call to come back- if you recall google from last tournament, he isn't here- but there are other creations who didn't bother to come back due to, y'know, just general dislike." This is one of those little lore bits thats so fucked up. So fucked up. Dr. Order can and will just ping a fucker's brain. Imagine being traumatized by a fucked up science lady and finding out she can just ping your Fucking Brain whenever she wants. No ignoring her! No pretending she can't hurt you anymore! She's in your Fucking Brain Now! Between this and things like the nccts' remotely triggered perfect spriteman transformation and Larry and J0hn's whole Bit. 'someone has done something to your body. A violation. A permanent damage. You might have agreed to it in theory, you might not have, but it doesn't matter. it wasn't supposed to be like this, and either way, things will never be the same. you don't have the same control over it anymore. All you can do is manage what comes in the aftermath.' hits. sci-fi flavored medical malpractice trauma

Also between this ping system and Quad's fucking bio-signature radar shit for finding her that led him to susan (which her other creations potentially also have, assuming theyre not One And The Same Function, given Larry's vague comment of 'also getting the vibes' from Susan when Quad and the tests came back positive for a match, the arrogance is on full display. Woman with SO many experiments that hate her: 'i will give them all an innate radar for finding their all-important creator. Surely they will not ultimately unionize and kill me' its more shocking that they mostly didnt than if they would have. Im not even ten minutes into this episode,

First up- the Dimensional Bus. Jay usually takes it to get here for commentating, being from another dimension and all, but he's not here because the bus is busy with this. Chat member: "is this just the magic school bus?" Ryan: "kind of, it is a living, breathing bus, except this one can go between dimensions while that one could only really go through Arnold."

Returning fighter, Dan in his miserable new job as a lab assistant! Allegedly got fired from his ICEE job because he uppercutted an ICEE machine and busted it, so now hes here. People's champ! 

Another returning fighter and fan favorite, Machiavelli! He was excited for this! His first tournament was so fun!!! He's excited for this!

Mach 2! A supposed evolution upon Machiavelli's floorplan, created as a backup in case Machiavelli ever defected, and, due to this and how beloved Machi is, (and by design, as we later learn when CPUK Orange rolls around,) Mach 2 has developed a bit of an inferiority complex and intends to prove himself the better of the two. According to the submission, not exactly a clone of machiavelli, but made from the same core genetic base but with alterations, taking loose inspiration for the shape of him somewhat from Machi's friendship with genfour, previously genwun, hence the pokemon-ish appearance. I think Mach 2 brought this up in 23, i don't remember the exact words but I recall him taking offense to the label of Clone and going 'im not a clone! Im not a clone! I read my file Im Not A Clone!'

Perfect Spriteman! The commentators were surprised to learn Spriteman's new and dreadful form had been the Doctor's doing. He has been a plant for months please god someone help him

Winston Overwatch fell from the moon and got taken in by Dr. Order in exchange for his collaboration and Winston's fine with this as long as he gets some ankles out of the deal. Winston, audibly smiling: "Im only going to be using my ultimate in this game! Because Im Mad As Fuck!" His guns and such are not allowed in the lab because Dr. O doesn't trust him not to break anything.

Google Plus. She just made another one. partly out of spite, partly just to even her roster back out after his defection, with what she deemed Google's biggest flaws removed. 'It doesnt feel, think, or grow- just a series of if-then statements that does nothing of its own volition.' Ryan: "I think Order's goal here is to just. Not get the shit beaten out of her by a web browser anime boy gijinka this time." Comona: "never again." Ryan: "I mean. We'll see what happens."

Hackerbot J0hn! Ryan talks about j0hn like a fully robotic, fully artificial guy who can just disguise as being realistically human if so desired for much of this episode, although this is later determined not to be the case. Dr. Order's primary goal in modifying john was apparently exactly what was technically achieved- to create a machine that appears human in every way- finding means of emulating emotion and appearance and everything through machinery- and is capable of modifying and improving upon itself. she just apparently achieved this by extensively cyborg-ing a hacker and roboticist who already knew how to do that stuff to other robots. with ryan later implying she did very little to ensure his survival of the process of getting cyborg'd, and how her creations keep wising up and ditching her, boy howdy j0hn really was just a trial run in every way for her. She was a total lamo to j0hn's entire body indeed. With how much monitoring she did of all her creations and the tournament overall, I wonder if she ever attempted to plagiarize any of j0hn's self-modification or did he and larry rip the spyware type shit out of themselves first and foremost. Could larry even safely remove that stuff given hes much more uh. Flesh-y? questions questions questions. 

Anyway. j0hn can in fact switch freely between -bot and -man form without issue so again, the sweating and discomfort described from his intro ep switch is Interesting, especially considering other instances of what can be retroactively ascribed to some level of script-awareness.

My Grunk! Its zombie! Mean-spirited parody of Home's revival of the grunk. Comona: "not only poorly executed, but tasteless!" Ryan: "yeah, dr. order, wheres your ethics? Your Hip Of Cratic Oath?"

Subzero Amalgam- this one was just order fucking around. She was curious about the experience of sustained extreme cold, and so she made a guy who is always extremely fucking cold. She, apparently, just found other uses for him and his nature later. Its interesting to me that subzero is one of the doctors' only creations that remains loyal to her and probably the only one that remained loyal that isn't being naive as of the nccts and is also one of the only ones that wasn't made with a particularly restrictive goal in mind- he was made to be cold. Hes cold. Hes succeeded by nature of birth and cannot fail her because that was all he was meant for in the first place, everything else is just a bonus.

The Carrot Collective! Was supposed to be an olimar. lol. According to the submission information, a psychic hivemind of carrots grown by patch farms in collaboration with Dr. Order. Each individual body's life is very short, but more sprout up to replace them and the collective mind lives on unaffected. The fighter bodies we see are little mechas the carrots pilot for smash purposes because its difficult to have a traditional and fair 3-stock game against an army of regeneratively immortal psychic carrots. Likes to be called C.C. for short. 

Crimsonaut. Little guy!!! Beloved!!! Dr. Order launched this little dude into The Crimson (location) to research it's nature and he came back from that little expedition Perfectly Fine, aside from some very permanently dyed gear. Totally uncontaminated otherwise, he was carefully screened upon his return. (lol. lmao.) Does have a bit of a personal bone to pick with the doctor due to the overall inhumane and scary nature of said forced research trip, though. The carrots like him, so some of them have a tendency to follow him around too.

Zapmouse! Angy rat that hates the doctor so so so much. so so so so so so so much. Dr. Order subjected him to Fuckt Up Experimence and he showed up to the tournament looking for an opportunity for revenge.

Nuke Suit! Somewhat unstable robot suit powered thoroughly by nuclear energy.

Recon Riley! Dr. Order's intel specialist, modified for stealth and acting as her spy on kerfuffle since the tournaments started. If Dr. O needed to know something about any given fighter, Riley's on the job. Genderfluid and uses any pronouns interchangeably.

There was one last open position that the doctor expected someone to arrive to fill- specifically Not google- but they never showed up, and so Sephiroth stepped into that empty placement in the Doctor's tournament. Think the implication with the twist grudge match at the end of this gaiden is that this spot was meant for Larry.

Dr. Order and Sephiroth fight for the exhibition. Sephiroth takes the win as expected.

First match- My Grunk vs. The Carrot Collective! Ryan: "I think Dr. Order's operating on a misled hypothesis- I think she thinks what's made The Grunk so strong is being brought back from the dead, but i think its more complicated than that. the grunk has a spirit that doesn't really… translate. My Grunk is very Zombielike. No life in him. No spirit. Now the carrot collective? I see spirit there." funny

My Grunk struggles with KOs, a single carrot surviving to almost 200% on first stock. Ryan: "My Grunk being this archetype of character requires a lot of micromanaging and planning the original grunk was not slowed down by. The Grunk was not and did not need to be… cunning." Comona: "theres a difference between a natural raw fighting instinct and battling with a spartan mind. and the grunk is not the latter." The match keeps close, but the carrots take it. Ryan has to fix the overlay and almost accidentally puts captain crimson in trying to put up the carrots. Comona: "that man is never allowed back in here again. That man is banned. From Life, even."

Chat member: "dr. order is just recording everything you guys say commentating, are y'all like… okay with that?" Ryan: "shes been monitoring everything thus far already and she hasn't gotten anything from our commentating so far, I don't see what difference it makes." Comona: "we broadcast on public channels, the information's already out there regardless." Ryan: "its about as much our fault as anybody's." sure bud.

Grunk WOULD play minceraft. But not hardcore mode he'd last all of seven minutes

My Grunk manages to take it to a game 3, munching on some nerfed meat. Comona: "NEVER NERF GRUNK'S MEAT!" Ryan: "I had a bit of discussion with Dr. Order about the Carrot Collective- we dont know a lot about these fighters, a lot of these guys are new- and while my grunk is pretty self-explanatory, just kind of mindless, yknow, like a zombie, Carrot Collective actually, is a collaborative effort with patch farms and is a relative to Corn on the Cob and the like." Comona: "I like that, its nice." Ryan: "just a nice little happy family!"

The carrots have a very funny SD and do not successfully climb out of the deficit it puts them in, and theyre first out of the tournament to the commentators and chat's disappointment. Dr. Order mentions disinterestedly the Collective's interest in joining up with Team Craken, so its not like they're going away. Ryan almost gave the win to the carrots by accident and the commentators reassure us that they would Never alter the results of a tournament in their own interest because theyre a respectable, upstanding establishment. Somewhere plum sneezes 

Round 2, the unstable nuclear suit, vs. Machiavelli! Comona: "a lot of people arent gonna want to fight that, theyre gonna be like 'oh no, i dont know, what if something goes wrong-' Machiavelli does not care about that." Ryan: "Machiavelli's here to have a good time even if that means endangering everyone." Machiavelli LOVES to smash nuclear weaponry with comically oversized looney tunes mallet

Nuke suit was designed for anti-air capabilities and Machi loves to float, so round one is mostly a learning experience. I wonder how, with how order is, that Machi's so thoroughly decided 'fighting is for having fun and playing <3' moreso than winning. particularly in ncct 1 that interaction where they excitedly say they think larry's closer to the ultimate fighter because he's so versatile, 'shifty all the time!' even though he lost, and all.

Machi does a silly little happy dance when he takes nuke suits second stock in the second match. Machi's playing baseballs with Rockets. Machi, lets nuke suit take it to last stock for fun, for the Excitement, and eats a 2-0 for it. Nuke suit moves on. Order doesnt particularly react to this, just keeping a close eye on the nuke suit's instability. Machi and the Carrots leave to hang out in the lab's breakroom.

Zapmouse vs Winston Overwatch. A haunted rat in a haunted lab, seeking the most violent sort of revenge… and a funny monkey also. Winston wants to use zapmouse like a gun and zapmouse is Not Having It. Zapmouse plays careful and smart and gets a solid damage lead at the start in the first match but unfortunately, his opponent is A Fucking Gorilla. Zapmouse prevents a 3 stock but Winston wins handily. Winston has made an enemy today. Second match is much more even. Zapmouse loves zapping people off ledges. Winston swats him like a fly for last stock, winning 2-0. Zapmouse wanders off snarling.

Sephiroth taking the absentee spot and subzero amalgam is introed with Hey Ya- WHATS COOLER, THAN BEING COOL. Ryan: "so, we dont really know much about subzero amalgam personality-wise, but we do know subzero was only made to make a guy that knows what itd be like to be very very cold. So judging from that I cant imagine subzero's a very big fan of doctor order." Comona: "Subzero's actually so cold, its vocal box doesn't work properly, so it all just comes out as beeps. If Subzero was able to be warmer he would sound like a relatively normal man." nccts said 'lol. lmao. subzero's actually one of her only creations thats loyal to her still and is probably one of the most eloquent of them all when those beeps are translated <3'

Puzz asks in chat if subzero amalgam has any connection to ICEE and ryan says ICEE might be willing to eat him if you artificially flavored him. if he weren't sentient making that effectively cannibalism, of course. but there's no connection. awesome

Commentators keep ascribing a deathwish to subzero due to the horrors of being cruelly made just to be so very VERY cold. Subzero loses and Ryan says subzero's mostly just upset he isn't dead yet. Also that Subzero and Zapmouse are suffering buddies. Subzero left pretty much immediately after losing 2-0 to sephiroth, wandering off for whatever reason. 

Spriteman vs. Hackerbot J0hn! Comona praises J0hn and Spriteman's professionalism, and Ryan says the report from the field is that J0hn will swap back to human form if bot form proves disadvantageous. It proves disadvantageous. Perfect Spriteman is vicious and playing honest with the projectiles is NOT helping, and Bot form is going in his pocket for now as we get a scene, heard through the Copious Amount of Recording Equipment in the lab, Because the Dr. Is A Freak About It. J0hn: "you… you bastard. You used to be just like me- what happened? Why did you abandon who you were?" Perfect Spriteman, trying to speak and failing: "sprite… sprite…" J0hn, clearly disturbed: "....what the Fuck? Okay??? Alright??? I mean I went with this form because I was expecting a pushover, but maybe I was wrong. Let's do this motherfucker."

Comona speculates Dr. Order doesn't really like or want J0hn hanging around the lab in -Man form because that hacking sword is Worrying for her. Also suggests J0hn can hack opponent's minds to read for what they're going to try next, which... thats an application of script awareness/sensitivity ive wondered about before- if you can read the script and someone's current thoughts are important enough to get logged in it wouldnt that make you effectively Slightly, Incidentally capable of reading minds, if only usually for the Narratively Important ™️ bits, and communication over the script in a telepathy-like form is smthn that happens a few times during the nccts between people capable of percieving and manipulating it, particularly cosmic with the other non-cobalt gods. Certain workings of the script appearing to function like supernatural psychic phenomena to the unknowing eye. Chartreuse and Crimson have had unsecured script-based twin telepathy and known they were fictional characters since they were like. born probably. and just. never directly told or explained any of this to cobalt ever and still havent. Im rambling this tangent's barely relevant to the gaiden at hand

J0hn takes first stock with an effective usage of glass cannon protocol (smash art.) Sprite is dissolving the plant's brain and he is playing DUMB this match, j0hn taking it to a round 3.

Perfect Spriteman is just gasping and sputtering 'sp-sprite…' and J0hn looks on. "Jesus Christ, what'd Doctor Order do to you…? Looks like I gotta get you back to the way you used to be, my man." Ryan sets the rule as: if J0hn wins with two stocks or more, spriteman will be cured. J0hn is decidedly doing considerably better in -man form, but alas Spriteman is still a vicious battle freak. J0hn, after losing: "wish the best for ya, my man. If you ever feel like coming back to reality, I'll be right here for ya."

Crimsonaut vs Google Plus! Crimsonaut described as being of a nervous disposition, but again, Ticked Off about Dr. Order abandoning him in an alternate evil dimension that he 'barely made it out of with his life' and Google Plus as not really… having a personality yet. Just if/then statements. Crimsonaut, to Dr. Order and about Google Plus: "I want to destroy you, and everything you stand for, and I'll start with your little pet project here!" Considering the slimey hiss of a voice Comona gives him here and how Crimsonaut stands guard during the raid and how Crimson attempted a coup in the bad timeline and calls the doctor a freak when orange rolls around this bit is fun. This bit is fun.

Their first match has Plus in the lead to start with, but Crimsonaut evens out the damage and although plus takes first stock, Crimsonaut takes them back to even shortly after. However, an unfortunate offstage fumble Plus takes advantage of costs the little man an early second stock, Plus having a little throwback to Bing in terms of enjoying those offstage dunks. Crimsonaut takes it to a close last stock anyway with a lot of careful play, but Plus takes it. Ryan: "Crimsonaut's been working with the Doctor for a long time. if you trust a guy to take your stuff into a different dimension you probably trust them with a lot- he's probably been familiar with her if/then programming pretty long, granted he's been away for a while now, but he still knows her style."

Crimsonaut embarrassingly early first stock in round 2 😔 but crimsonauts got good momentum and puts enough damage on fast enough to even things out again. Plus appears to begin… malfunctioning somewhat. Having some weird reactions intermittently. The match goes down to last stock, evenly high damage playing ledge games until Plus throws out an illogical move that Works, taking Crimsonaut's last stock and winning 2-0. Comona: "i hate to bring this up, but… d'ya think google's gotten into Google Plus's head? That didnt seem like an if/then scenario." Ryan describes Dr. Order looking worried about the situation unfolding and covering the window she's watching the combat from when she noticed him looking. Ryan looks at Orders cybersecurity monitoring setup and can't See any outside influence causing the apparent disruption, but he's not sure, they'll have to wait and see. Comona describes how if they were Order, they'd be keeping a close eye on their creations because yet another rogue element could be dangerous for her.

The Dimensional Bus who abandoned Jay at the station, vs Mach 2! Mach 2 is mentally locked on doing better than his predecessor, who got out round one, by taking this chance and kicking the bus's ass. The Dimensional Bus was with Crimsonaut when they ventured into the Crimson and made it out just fine. Unclear if this means the Bus was stranded with Crimsonaut and came back with him or ditched him there by himself at some point to return to its job of ferrying people between worlds, but the latter seems more likely as it sounds like Crimsonaut only got back really recently and the bus was In Use in previous episodes. The Bus was also thoroughly screened for Crimson contamination and came back clean, but considering Crimsonaut smuggled Crimson in unnoticed through the same screening process, the only reason I trust that is because Dan beats the hell out of the Bus later and not a thing comes of it crimson-ways.

Mach 2 takes round one, but in round 2 as the commentators completely fail to pay attention to the match discussing music tastes instead, he does markedly worse, feeling even more inferior that the people being paid to be here to commentate on his fight could not give a shit less because theyre more concerned with talking about Nickelback. Pour one out for Mach 2's round 2, run over by the vengabus.

Round 3 opens STRONG with mach 2 footstooling the bus into a pit, but the bus takes mach 2's first stock and pineapples him for the second, creating a reversal of the lead that mach 2 cannot climb out of the pit of. Mach 2's absolute nightmare scenario. He loses. 

Mach 2, very upset, calls out Machi to come settle a score. Machi: "Okay! :D" its grudge match time! Comona: "I know this is probably a fairly even match but i can't help but get like, yamcha vs. the saibamen vibes." Ryan: "yeah, mach 2's about to get yamcha'd." Chat member: "vegeta level complex, yamcha level winstreak." The match IS actually quite even, although Machi keeps at least a small lead the whole time. Machi, in his littol baby voice as he closes last stock: "nothing personal, Mach 2!" and teleports behind him kicking him into the blast zone. Mach 2 is left facedown in a crater yamcha posed while Machi gives his limp, motionless body a hug before walking off.

Chat member asks if mach 2's like, actually dead and ryan clarifies no, he doesn't like killing off characters for anything less than big stakes and even then he brought the grunk back, they didnt even kill crimson really, just banished him. Chat Member: "except light pit." Ryan: "oh SHIT i forgot, light pit DID get canonically killed by palutena."

Lab Intern Dan vs Recon Riley! Ryan intros Riley with a homestuck reference. Recon Riley is the ninja, the secret agent, the silent watcher thats so hard to come to terms with the presence of this whole time due to their skill in moving unnoticed and untouched. Dan and Riley are both employees here, but Riley's the one with the status, that actually gets to sit at the meetings that Dan brings coffee to. Comona: "Dan's not an avaricious man, but he probably thinks 'man, it'd be cool to be the one that gets a seat at the table.'" Riley is stated to be genderfluid here because Ryan noticed he was playing fast and loose with the pronouns in regard to them so hes deciding thats because she uses any/all of 'em. 

Despite TWO self-destructs from fumbled kill attempts, Dan takes Riley to last stock, and then he SDs again. dan's said to put so much time into 9-5ing that he has almost no time for doing or practicing things he actually enjoys. Feel that buddy 😔 Riley's only real combat strength is being a mosquito. Being fast and hard to hit and unmerciful. But that wont help when dan has the Giant Fist. Get uppercut'd nerd its game 3 time. After that uppercut kill dan's feeling CONFIDENT and he gets out to a strong strong lead. As things go to last stock and dan has a dramatic damage lead, Riley's only beginning to panic about losing to the rank and file employee right as its about to happen, and Dan socks riley with a jab for last stock

My Grunk vs Nuke Suit! Comona praises that nuke suit is just a learning combat ai suit with no sentience at all whatsoever and that's what Dr. Order's stuff works best as. Ryan reminds that Nuke Suit is potentially very dangerous due to its nuclear nature, and also compares its robotic nature to Google Plus's. First match between these two- if you get distracted for even a moment you will miss nuke suit losing its first two stocks. My Grunk takes it. Nuke Suit shifts to what the commentators call an 'unstable form.' Ryan: "my grunk? Sweetie? Be Careful."

My Grunk, immediately: (makes a dick shaped dirt sculpture between bullying nuke suit with fire, trying to blow it up with dynamite and taking apart a plane with his bare hands)

Commentators start considering evacuating the building before getting messaged by J0hn that they can relax, nothings gonna blow up the nuke suit's full of shit. He was monitoring the situation and it was just in Intimidation Mode, using the appearance of instability to try to get an edge in combat by making its opponent panic. Dr. Order: bad person, interesting ideas!

Sephiroth vs Winston Overwatch. Sephiroth hates this fucking ape and wants to prove he can get further than midway into a tournament. Winston yeets sephiroth's twink ass like an empty can for the first stock and its VERY funny. Most of this first game is vine jokes, match commentary and very silly kills. Funny Monkey GETS him. Round 2 is more in sephiroth's favor, and a lot of the commentators begging for winston to fucking GET him with the funny donkey punch in his very punchable face. Winston ALMOST reverse 3-stocks. but sephiroth HAD to rob us of it. Sephiroth: "how could you take me to my limit?!" Winston: "Hehe, hi there, im a funny monkey." Sephiroth, responding to the audience: "...how do they know… about the weights in my shirt?" And goes shirtless. Winston wonders what he'd look like with pink hair (due to a silly skin misclick), completely disengaged from the anime dramatics.

Sephiroth: "This Is More Of A Tits Out Kind Of Look." Chat Member: "sephiroth now weighs as much as a pichu." Winston overwatch sends him straight to hell with a stomp. Hell is said to be in paris but i think this is just ryan making an overwatch map joke in context. This being said it would be very funny. Sephiroth wins with his shirt off in an electrically close down to the wire match. Winston then immediately raids Dr. Order's breakroom for its stock of peanut butter and immediately dips. Ryan: "respect the grift, my man." Winston overwatch becomes accomplice to war criminal for some fucking peanut butter

Spriteman vs. Google Plus! Spriteman's still lost in that sauce called sprite. Perfect Spriteman takes advantage of Plus's general predictability to read him again and again. Google Plus is still behaving a bit erratically- possibly due to outside interference, possibly not, it's unclear yet, but it could be contributing to why Plus is losing here. Ryan: "both of these people are… very very damaged by Doctor Order and need to come to terms with it- Plus being entrenched in pure objectivism and Perfect Spriteman is just all about… obsession." I know what ryan Meant here but hearing 'Google Plus is into objectivism' took a year off my life never imply Plus reads ayn rand ever again even on accident please and thanks (lighthearted)

After losing to Spriteman and after certain weird aspects of his match with Crimsonaut, Plus questions the effectiveness of the if/then logic format he's been acting based on due to it returning inconsistent results despite being based on consistent reasoning, and decides to reformat his thought processes and seize control, 'becoming sentient' in his words. He just sort of decided "ok this isnt working perfectly 100% of the time. ergo clearly i have to be at least enough of a person to figure out what actually DOES work.' Doesnt make him do any better fighting perfect spriteman in though. Plus checks his database for what to do about failure, finds nothing, decides next action based on newly acquired 'sentience' and wipes both his queries and an unnamed External Force from mind and demands a battle with the Doctor.

Doctor Order's head is in her hands. She doesn't know why this keeps happening. (My money's on 'cant make a thing Detect spectrum if it cant understand what spectrum is at the baseline, that being art and connection, something that requires complex nonliteral thought and the ability to process communication and emotion to thoroughly get. Not to Philosophy of Art but elephants can slap abstract strokes of paint on a canvas and AI can recombine assets to make a new image but far as im concerned without communication and interpretation its not really anything grander than the blunt sum of its parts by itself, and while you can interpret both those examples if you feel like it you cant feel a communication of intent bc to an elephant the paintbrush might as well be a stick with mud on it thats fun to smear on things and to an ai its just data because it doesnt Think like we do. There isn't the same Artistic Intent in the action because it couldn't begin to process art the same way we do. We can make it art through interpretation but it was not created with intent of making art by what made it, even if the zookeepers and the users of the AI or the people who had their data scraped to train it had artful intentions, because art is a Human Thing, so there is something always just. Missing. anyway.) Plus is kicking her ass. Stop making animeboy web browsers. You only have yourself to blame doc. 

There's the suggestion made in this episode that maybe there's something special about Bing thats lead to Goog and Plus's awareness, but honestly Especially in hindsight i don't buy it he's just a guy to me. No amount of Technique (nccts) can convince me otherwise. I think Bing could do that where Dani couldn't because he is simultaneously so relevant (by extension of goog and now dani) and irrelevant that he could both enter the void and not be claimed by it and no other reason. I think making him special is unnecessary and would be distracting, although he'd probably disagree with me. The idea that goog and mac have to be made from someone special to be special is rey palpatine logic to me

Comona: "i think that Google Plus playing reactively now instead of distracting himself trying to process a bunch of different scenarios all at once bodes well for the mechanical being that he is." Ryan: "yeah, for a guy made of flowcharts hes reacting very well, abandoning the flowcharts is probably the best decision hes made." Doctor Order loses to an uptilt and goes back to her viewing box grumbling irritably about it happening again, and snaps that it doesnt matter, Plus might not have emotions or whatever but he still lost the tournament, so if he wants to leave then go AHEAD, because she won't be using him anyway. Plus: "Victory achieved. Seeking further victory." And marches out of the lab to go pick some fights like an unbothered king

Dan vs The Dimensional Bus! Dan can, should, must and WILL demolish a FUCKING bus. He did get tazed in the ass in the process but its fine its fine its fine. Dan prints out memes and puts them on the fridge in the breakroom and is also good as fuck at peggle. Thoroughly destroyed that fuckin bus in both rounds. Ryan: "if you told me at the start of this tournament that dan would be in top 4 i would have laughed you out of the room."

My Grunk vs. Sephiroth. Sephiroth fought grunk proper last tournament so thats funny. Ryan: "oh god, i've just realized that of the 16 people here only a few of them weren't created by doctor order and two of them are in top four. I think Dr. Order kind of sucks." Sephiroth, stuck in a minecart: "i will show this minecart despair." Alas the zombie cant compete well with Sephiroth From Sephiroth, and round one is Cruel. Chat asks if Riley is a creation of Dr. Order and Ryan replies yes, but only in the sense that Riley was Modified for stealth by Order, they were born a regular person.

Perfect Spriteman vs. Dan! Perfect Spriteman takes first round pretty easily and handily, but someone gets sent down to let Dan know how many people are cheering for him. Dan: "...What? They're cheering for me? What? I'm just a Guy. You sure? You're not confusing me for someone else? Me? ME? I feel like you've gotta be messing with me here, but I win, I lose, its for you guys, aight? Stay frosty, motherfuckers." Commentators discuss how cpu kerfuffle true ending is Dan getting to be champ and how he should be in charge actually as Dan takes first stock, and the match is fun and tense as dan works hard to successfully pull it to a round 3. 

Dan apparently knows and feels next to NOTHING about what's specifically going on with the labs, he's just here for the paycheck. He doesn't even know Perfect Spriteman used to be a guy. which i mean yeah makes sense his first fuffle was already after Spriteman transformed. Ryan: "hes just here to punch." Comona: "hes just like 'oh theres a monster? I mean thats kind of normal for kerfuffle so whatever'" Ryan: "I was here for like. kerfuffle 5 to fight hamburger helper. this is nothing." Ryan makes a comment on the match about CPUs not being smart enough to make a particular play a human could go for and Comona shushes him and Ryan goes "oh yeah i forgot." Match is tense enough the commentators dont comment on much else. Ryan: "The pressure is on- but I don't think Dan's feeling it because he doesnt realize just how many people are watching and rooting for him, and I dont think perfect spriteman even realizes he's in a tournament right now hes just acting on base instinct." Spriteman takes last stock, winning 2-1.Dan pushes Spriteman out of center stage a little bit to say something. Dan: "that guy on the side said there were people watching this and… cheering? for me? So I still don't know if this whole thing is a bit, so I'm gonna preface this whole thing with that because if I'm being played for a goddamn idiot right here and like, you're gonna put this in a cringe compilation or something thats some Bullshit- but to all you people out there cheering for me… thank you so much. Im not sure if you all know it, but god DAMN does that mean so much to me. To know that like- even though my life's been Failure after Failure that like- theres still people out there chanting my name- APPARENTLY, according to that guy- so uh- if this is a cringe compilation you BETTER not post that shit- but if it isnt… thanks you guys. I'm gonna hit up steak and shake." I want to hug him. I want to hug him so bad it makes me look stupid. 

Sephiroth vs Perfect Spriteman, Grand finals! Fast and tense set. Sephiroth takes game one, directly demanding to be taken seriously as an antagonist and like, with the metanarrative element grand kerfuffle and the nccts introduced with time that's Funny. Commentators reiterate how funny sephiroth doing so well is when he wasn't even supposed to BE here, someone just didn't show up. During the second match, the commentators hear something go off somewhere in the lab- some kind of distant siren or alert. Second match goes to a last stock situation, and Spriteman clinches it, taking it to a game 3. The shirt comes off, theyre on new donk and sephiroth is leading and hes being scary scary scary and then he sds, choking in the silliest way possible and never recovers. The tournament's winner, and calibur's representative for the next tournament is Perfect Spriteman! 

But before the commentators can finish announcing that, Dr. Order arrives on the scene with an urgent announcement: "Listen, everyone, theres been a break-in, and we need to lock down and take care of the problem, every stay where you are and once the intruder has gone away-" and shes interrupted. "Ho ho, you want to stop NOW huh? Maybe you should've stopped when you gave me all of this… bullshit! Don't get me wrong, I love the bullshit, but I still think you've gotta pay!" And Larry appears, first as himself, and then as his 'true form' melts away to get set for a random roll: "Listen, you made this bed, time for you to lie in it!" Dr. Order: "I've had enough of this shit anyway. Doesn't matter what happened. I will have Perfect Spriteman as my champion, and you'll see, in the next tournament, Perfect Spriteman will-" Larry, cutting her off and starting the match: "Yeah, yeah, whatever." Comona, as Larry: "Pull up those yoga pants and come for a fight, 'cause I'm looking for one."

Larry rolls ryu. This does not bode well. Ryan, now looking into the Doctor's files, determines Florida Man was once just a joker, but after interacting with Dr. Order, became what he is now with the powers of shapeshifting. Dr. Order takes first stock. Order: "you think I couldn't best my own creations?" Larry: "yeah, I talked to google!" Dr Order keeps a strong lead, but Larry IS out here playing street fighter. Larry, comboing her: "hey doc Google Plus showed me how flowcharts work Check This Shit Out!" Alas, while Larry does Pretty Damn Good for a Ryu, he gets footstooled and loses his last stock. Doctor Order, looking down on him: "you really thought you could come back, and you could defeat me? After all this?" Larry laughs, on the ground. "Yeah, its called making it past seventh in a tournament. But hey, you know the curse you gave me. You win some… you lose some. I'm getting the hell out of here. I know you're so PROUD of ~Perfect Spriteman~ but you aren't so proud of yourself, are ya?" Dr. Order tries to snap back "I dont NEED to be-" but larry, not letting her finish, turns into meta knight and teleports away with his cloak, and Squid Jenny delivers the finalized cast list for the next episode.

#rewatch