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blusical · 6 months

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Ableism in Hockey

[PT: Ableism in Hockey. End PT] Trigger warning: Ableist comments and language, uncensored slur. We already talk about the homophobia, misogyny, racism, abuse and bullying that's almost engrained in hockey culture. However, I don't see many people talk about the ableism that's way too common within hockey. Firstly, what is ableism?

Ableism is a form of discrimination, particularly towards people with physical, mental, intellectual and other forms of disabilities. Ableism towards those with mental illness is called sanism. Some examples of ableism include inaccessiblity, using ableist slurs (such as the r-slur), believing that disabled people are broken and need to be "fixed" or "cured", believing that people with certain mental health conditions are "evil" (ex. the evil alter stereotype towards folks with Dissociative Identity Disorder or believing that everyone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder is abusive). Ableism within hockey fandoms.

Some of you are already familiar with the "blind/deaf ref" joke. Almost everyone has made such jokes at some point (or at least laughed at one). Well, earlier today I was watching an Instagram reel featuring a league of blind hockey players. The comments, while most of them surprisingly supportive, also showed that such jokes aren't exactly harmless...

Worst part, I only saw two people take issue with these comments. TWO. Ironically enough, one of them was a referee who just so happened to actually be blind! While it's easy to assume they didn't know better (and they probably didn't, considering this joke is unfortunately way too common), it kind of serves as a reminder about how we view disabled hockey fans, players, coaches and, yes, even refs (especially those that are blind or deaf). And it's not just blind or deaf individuals being made fun of. It's also very easy to go into hockey spaces and see disability or neurodivergent-based buzzwords thrown around, such as "delusional" (or, and this is the only time I'll say this willingly, "delulu"), without the people saying it even realizing the harmful affects it could have on those who do genuinely experience delusions or psychosis (such as those with schizophrenia).

Ableism within the sport itself.

Within hockey, some youth organizations still use the m-word (shown below so people know what I'm referring to), despite it being considered an offensive term (and even a slur to some) towards people with dwarfism. In 2020, Hockey Canada dropped the term, but some organizations still use it, including USA Hockey.

Ableism by the players is also something we should address. In 2022, the Boston Bruins signed Mitchell Miller, a player who's infamous for bullying a black disabled teen (CW: Uncensored r-slur, brief detail of physical violence and unsanitary actions). He was eventually released two days later after backlash from fans (though the contract didn't end until February), however it was not a good look for Boston. (Man, ableism and racism. Talk about a double whammy). Earlier this year, a video surfaced of Carson Briere and a few other individuals pushing an unoccupied wheelchair down the stairs; the wheelchair was severely damaged and had to be replaced. Not long after the video surfaced, Mercyhurst Hockey cut him from the team. Both of the above mentioned have since signed with a team in Slovakia.

And this isn't even getting into the likelihood of ableist slurs being used on the ice. Lastly, many hockey arenas are still inaccessible, with many disabled fans unable to enter access in some, getting accessible seating is a hassle and many unable to buy tickets due to high prices (something that lots of disabled folks have issues with in many events.). Crowds and noise at venues can also be overwhelming to those on the autism spectrum (Like me!) and unfortunately not many hockey arenas have sensory rooms (However there IS some improvement being made on this end!) And unfortunately, watching from TV might not even be an option for some folks, as digital ads have also raised concerns about potentially causing seizures in photosensitive folks.

Disabled folks are considered an afterthought when it comes to fun events such as sports.

That may seem like an exaggeration, but unfortunately it's not. Disabled folks are always viewed as an afterthought in the world, and whenever basic accessible features are requested, they're told to "grow up snowflake" or that the "world doesn't revolve around you". And sports is no different. As the above show, disabled folks aren't taken seriously, especially when it's so easy to see blind and deaf folks become the butt of jokes when making fun of refs, mockery of addiction (alcohol addiction, gambling addiction, drug abuse, etc). And the worst part: Almost nobody is talking about it. Not until not anyway. We discuss the misogyny, the queerphobia and the racism. But we never talk about the ableism within hockey culture. Well, now's the time.

#song: serious #cw ableist language #cw slurs #ableism #hockey #nhl #college hockey #disability #neurodivergent #ice hockey #sports #hockey blog #hockeyblr #song:serious #long post #btw any reblogs/comments saying “quit being sensitive” or “i'm [x] and this doesn't offend me” will be removed and blocked instantly #you don't speak for everyone and neither do i. this is just an infopost #i might make another post like this in the future showing how we can make sports more accessible to disabled fans #but for now have this piece

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small-strong-bookish-butch · 3 months

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Hi, this has been bouncing around my brain for at least 6 months like a computer screensaver. Special shoutout to @low--quality--child and N for not being in cults anymore <3

Image description: the triple spiderman meme, the spidermen left to right captioned: "my best friend (raised Evangelical)", "me (raised Catholic)", and "my partner (raised Mormon)". Text at the bottom says "What the fuck?! You really did that?!? Your religion is absolutely crazy"

/end description

#double spiderman #meme #ableist language cw #christianity #tw ableist language #the other alters internally yell about making posts #okay to reblog #okay to comment #personal

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nothing-an-iratze-cant-fix · 7 months

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Really random tumblr hater? Who’s still using the word retarded? Pull yourself together, it’s not 2005.

#disgustingly ableist shitty behaviour #I mean just not insulting me because you didn’t like my comments was always an option but if you’re going to maybe try not to sound like #a late-stage Friends episode?#honestly some people #cw retarded #ableist bullshit #cw ableist language

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slugass · 2 months

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“only an idi ot would take [an ai-written script] at face value”

did you know?? people with mental disabilities exist?? and that?? people don’t even have to be mentally disabled to take things at face value?? it’s just that certain mental disabilities can amplify that??? AND YOU’RE USING LANGUAGE THAT TARGETS A SPECIFIC TYPE OF MENTAL DISABILITY (INTELLECTUAL DISABILITY)??? ONE OF THOSE DISABILITES THAT AFFECTS HOW YOU UNDERSTAND THINGS??? AS AN INSULT?? A FUCKING INSULT?? TO INSULT SOMEONE WHO MIGHT NOT EVEN HAVE ANY MENTAL DISABILITY?????

did you also know?? just because you’re critizing a genuinely bad idea like the dashcon/krusty land-looking ass willy wonka thing relying on AI doesn’t mean you should be free to throw around ableist terms???

DID YOU KNOW THAT YOU DON’T HAVE TO BLAME EVERY SINGLE FUCKING BAD IDEA AND DECISION OR MISTAKE ON AN INTELLECTUAL DISABILITY THAT YOUR TARGET MIGHT NOT EVEN FUCKING HAVE?!?!?!? THAT’S RIGHT!!!!! YOU DON’T!!!!! YOU FUCKING DON’T!!!!!

DID YOU FUCKING KNOW YOU DON’T HAVE TO BE MENTALLY DISABLED TO MAKE MISTAKES!! NON-MENTALLY DISABLED PEOPLE MAKE MISTAKES TOO!! THEY EXIST!! THEY DON’T MAGICALLY BECOME “IDI OTS” JUST BECAUSE THEY MADE ONE MISTAKE!!!

EVEN IF THE PERSON MAKING A MISTAKE LIKE NOT KNOWING SOMETHING WAS AI-GENERATED WAS MENTALLY DISABLED, IS AN OUTDATED TERM LIKE “IDI OT” THE BEST CHOICE TO YOU??? FUCKING REALLY???

TLDR Please stop blaming every bad decision/idea or mistake on being [insert ableist adjective here]. And please stop using mental disabilities as an insult.

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box-of-chaooos · 4 months

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To the delightful person who decided it would be a great idea to call me the r word and tell me I don’t know about my own diagnosis and that I’m faking it.

Check your damn privileges before assuming shit about a complete stranger you asshat.

Because I think I know my own diagnosis better than a guy with one post about ‘girls fetishising gays’ and a blank pfp.

Either way pls report this guy and generally just get him off here before he says something to someone else and really hurts someone’s feelings, whilst I’m not upset by this just annoyed others can be really hurt by this kinda thing. So watch out n stay safe :)

#chaos personal #autism #actually autistic #hate #ableism #ableist language cw #tw abelism #hate comments

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aro-culture-is · 2 years

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aro culture is loving being in the dsmp fandom because most people are against shipping and the fandom mostly focuses on friendship/familial relationships

(if anyone intends to send inflammatory asks, please read the tags)

#Anonymous #aro culture is #aro #aromantic #actually aro #actually aromantic #ask #mod alexander #dsmp cw #shipping cw #this fandom is one of the banes of my existence so: from the little research i can do it's really hard as an outsider to confirm that dream #was racist in the incident that is most talked about #however - again from an outsider who doesn't know who's reputable - it does appear that dream has made ableist comments pertaining to #the r-slur #and some racist comments specifically about native americans #that said it's again REALLY FUCKING HARD to confirm this as someone who like. 1) doesn't have twitter #2) doesn't interact with youtube outside of music and science things #3) doesn't know shit beyond the extremely well known aspects of minecraft. like. never played it and honestly just not interested #my overall take at this point is: i'd prefer to not receive submissions about dream #but i will publish them with a cw tag #because putting fandom specific rules is... really dicey at best and often leads to harassment that i cannot handle.

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elizabethrobertajones · 2 years

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I would love to hear your thoughts on [Unidentified Media]! We can all try to be grownups and survive disagreeing with a person on the Internet if that's what happens

Okay but I really hope you don't care deeply about this to the point of offence, I really don't want to upset anyone, and people really care a lot and I get it!

It's just that, I was requested to watch the latest Stranger Things by my very non-fandom normcore friend and I'd fallen behind since I forgot the netflix password on my laptop, so I saw all the spoilers before external social pressure got to me and got me to make the effort to watch it on the TV.

I just feel like I watched an entirely different show from everyone who'd got really invested in the first half of the season and then got completely crushed by the second half. First of all, no one spoiled ANY of the main story to me. I was more spoiled on the main story by fukkin BBC Newscast interviewing Kate Bush about the belated hit single, than anything I saw on tumblr.

And I casual fan watched this thing with the expectation I needed to be able to talk to my friend about it more than Tumblr, and you'd all be a side benefit where I could get the fandom goods and slyly ship that new ship on the side and it would just be a nice little thing between us who see subtext since my friend has no shipping instinct at all and the most important detail I had to get right was recognising Friendly Orderly (thanks IMDB) as Jace from the Shadow and Bone movie she took me to a few years back.

Anyway I ended up BAWLING over Max and adoring that storyline which absolutely fucking carried the show, and Eleven and her story which was actually riveting and I could see this was something they'd seeded from the start OR had gone back very carefully to explain plotholes/mysteries they'd flagged up from the first season or two. And the whole thing that everyone else was doing was so thematically tight to that.

I did think the WHOLE Russia plot was entirely stupid and fanservice for the Hopper actor guy to watch back later as the core audience and no one else, and the whole thing would have been a normal length if they'd just REMOVED it whole cloth and got the adults out the way another way. Like, the previous season would have been excellent if the russian thing was waaaaay lower scale and borderline imagined/threadbare single rogue actors concluded in a single season, and the American government was jumping at shadows, the kids legit were always a second away from seeming like they'd conjured the whole thing as a prank and there never HAD been russians in Hawkins, and Russia as a whole remained oblivious to this, like, they didn't order it nor did they actually ever have anything to do with it. IDK maybe the russians were operatives trapped in America and trying to get home by a portal if you HAD to send Hopper there. But frankly you shouldn't. But regardless, once they actually got to the finale movie of the damn thing, it was thematically tight and made sense to the story they were telling even if it was entirely stupid and pointless and also grounded in silly tropes, apparently has caused real world harm with the concentration camp appropriating (??? aargh??!?!?!). But like, that's legitimately my only complaint with the entire season/show storywise, taken at face value and just for my enjoyment/quick impressions of what is a good story.

So, to get to the actual point, fandom has completely and utterly made up the Steddie ship because there's legitimately nothing but a few seconds of actor chemistry, like, the 4 gifsets I saw beforehand are IT. Like maybe 3 shippable exchanges of actual dialogue interspersed through 9 MOVIE LENGTH EPISODES, and I don't even think Steve was putting out the vibes that hard. He was genuinely playing as in love with Nancy and permanently distracted by Nancy even when talking to Eddie. The looking at his lips gifset where Eddie looks moments from snogging Steve would be woefully onesided because that's literally the conversation where Eddie confronts him to tell him he's still in love with Nancy and Nancy leaped into the Upside Down after him in a heartbeat.

I loved Eddie. INcredible character. 10/10 would buy again. He and Friendly Orderly were both great characters with minimal IMDB histories who I cannot wait to hopefully be cast in a ton of stuff to continue their careers post-ST and for us to adore.

But that post about how Stranger Things is written as if being a nerd is the greatest oppression one can face? Literally true. Will crying in the car after assuring Mike that his nerdiness will not stop El loving him is THEE pinnacle of this ridiculousness but you have to understand, they Empire Strikes Back'd the whole story, Which means every single plotline they harped on in this first "half" is now set up for the second. I literally can't comment on how grossly they treated Will because while it seems vile so far in a meta sense that's not where they're leaving it, and Jonathan's reassurance to him and genuinely careful writing to make it clear this was all textual stuff and NOT the actors being goofy and putting gay subtext in means that Will is subtextually gay in an INTENTIONAL way. He's been written like this because they are acknowledging his sexuality, making his story about it until he gets back to Hawkins, and very clearly setting up that he's in absolute shambles, personally, in a way that HAS to be addressed later. Him crying like that was his horrible cliffhanger to be resolved that's just as horrible as Max in the hospital: that NEEDS to be fixed but the writing has put him here, not anything the actor did for funsies.

Meanwhile the sound editing on Eddie parading around the lunchroom was ATROCIOUS and I am 100% without reading a single interview or whatever that this is because the actor voluntarily leaped off the table and wandered out of the range of microphones etc and fucked up their sound set up by treating all the cafeteria as a stage, and it was so hecking cool they kept it in and just boosted the sound in a really weird way that made it all muffled and frontloaded in a way that my TV speakers hated. I could see the improv dripping off this lad. So I don't trust a single thing fandom is saying about ANYTHING he does as intentional writing because there's like 3 things per scene he's in that I feel were actually in the script because they're on message to the themes and the rest is all adorable actor bullshit.

What I can see is a character who they wrote as The Alpha Nerd, the Baddest Badass in this very persecuted subgenre, the man who makes it all worthwhile to be a nerd, the pinnacle of the mountain that these dweeby kids might climb. An accumulation of all that makes the younger ones cool all crammed into a single character. Mike's Heart, Dustin's funniness, Will's creativity, like even sass for sass with Lucas's sister??? Metal is the Nerd Music and you know he's in it for the Lord of the Rings references. And he's KIND to these little uns, even when it seems almost overbearing in the cafeteria scene he doesn't make it about bullying them he still manages to be aggressive but turn it around to a positive conclusion so they're not "in trouble" or ostracised for asking for a replacement for Lucas.

In short, I don't think he was actually meant to have as much characterisation as was brought to the role, and so him being written as an aspirational character makes him like. The Gandalf of D&D, and the rest of them the awed Frodo he's mentoring and setting them off on their journey, to a new level of pure geekdom, the untoxic pinnacle of what this personality trait might be, the unbeatable nerd who can't be bullied, who rises above it, who, of course. In the end will be SO cool that his outro is the bassest badass thing a nerd ever did see.

He was DESIGNED for his one true memorial to be a painting airbrushed on the side of a van showing his final concert, a la wizards on vans. That's his vibe, a living breathing Too Metal To Exist painting from the side of a van you smoke weed in.

It's just wildly unfortunate that he was so good at the role everyone adores him, and is always shipping around for ships they like, and he interacted with Steve twice while Steve was in a relationship quandry since his one true love is technically dating someone else still, leaving him single and open to interpretation (ish). Throw in the bananas good chemistry Steve and Robin have on screen and you get so much more character room to flesh him out so of course he is one of the better characters. And fandoms love shipping the two white boys who look at each other once.

I feel genuinely bad that people feel queerbaited and angry at the end of the season, but I think all the characters they feel were slighted (except Eddie) are being set up for a part 2 which lifts them up, while for example Max was an absolute MVP of the season but it looks like she may be getting a rest now for carrying the story after her FANTASTIC work in this half, so now we can maybe explore Will's story some more, for example, because he got so much less. El's the only one who really needs to be super character explored every season and they consistently do that because, well, she's the mainest plot character and fascinating. But this slanting towards one or the other character while leaving out others has helped lift up a sense that it shit all over certain characters, and Eddie counted as a main enough character to even be included in that group.

He never was, he just was a convincing side character who was adorable and badass so of course people want more of him. But it's not like something happened to make the writers just randomly decide to kill him after the first few episodes aired and they didn't put in a ton of queercoding and they didn't write parallels with him that would seriously mean that he was in contention as a love interest - his only major relationship was with Mike and Dustin and since Mike wasn't there, Dustin carried the end of his story alone (and it was lovely, and, again, made me cry but not bitter tears of resentment, just good tears of sad catharsis and loss of a nice character and grief well-written in the aftermath). If anything they said LOOKED like it was a parallel for love interest stuff, it was to boost our understanding of the main characters and to help us relate back to Eddie in turn by shorthand relating him to the ones we were already invested in (though again, so charismatic these are lines the writers only hypothetically needed if he'd been flatly acted XD)

Anyway as you can tell I think he's amazing, I just can't interact with a single post about him because every single one i've seen has severe poisoning with fandom anger, shock, queerbait allegations, intense Steddie shipping and denial and bringing him back to life etc, all of which are valid normal fandom things for any character, except the overnight aspect Netflix gives us and the ENORMOUS vitriol and also everyone's past fandom baggage like, literally overnight made a blorbo who's floating in a cesspool of stuff I don't agree with and don't want to interact with because I fundamentally don't see it that way and there's no dang normal content about him being cute and funny in an environment where he's not fandom's latest martyr on the My Gay Blorbo Deserved Better And You Murdered Him For Being Gay, JUST LOOK AT HOW THEY TREATED WILL, YOU ASSHOLES.

So, um. Having a normal one over here enjoying a show on the surface level while skeptical and not particularly wowed by the writers' deeper messages beyond "friendship good, family good, love good, everyone happy and successful when love and friend and family" which is, the basicest take ever but also guaranteed to make me cry if done with true authentic belief (and it was) but also in no way inspiring to make me go any deeper on fandoming given the weird worldview exposed by psychoanalysing literally anything that a male character who seems to represent an aspect of the writers does that is not clearly actor improv, and yet also having free access to Deep Fandom due to my entire dash posting this stuff :'D

#stranger things #long post for ts #wank cw #sorry fandom I am just not here on this one #also I mean re: the final point about love they sure hit an ableist trope about neurodivergence #I don't know nearly enough to comment on I've just seen others better placed dto discuss such things #talking about other villains in other media that I recognised the trope #but yeah villain motivation baaad D:#these tags are nothing to do with anything I discuss under the cut I just always have 1 more thing XD

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can-of-pringles · 5 months

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Having to unsubscribe from one of my favorite youtubers because a guest they had on the video casually dropped the r slur and they just let it slide

#even people in the comments were like wtf #kingani #ableist language cw

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radioconstructed · 8 months

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youtube

⌖ An EXCELLENT TUTORIAL!

#⌖ online #⌖ video #cw for outdated ableist language and made up grooming accusations. the usual fun stuff in internet comments #Youtube

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just-antithings · 6 months

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When i was an anti i used to think adult proshippers were this child hating/child bullying sociopaths who didn't care about children but now all i see is some tired adult just not wanting to deal with children on the internet left unattended and somehow that's the unrelated adult's fault. I mean, damn, once i'm 18 i'm probably going to be a MDNI account too.

#mod erin #ask #posted without comment #bullying mention #ableist language cw

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rogueddie · 10 months

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Aspec Steddie Fics

Important: READ THE TAGS! Also, leave a comment and kudos! These fics are amazing and I love them and I hope y'all do too 💜💚

Ace of Hearts

buttered_toasty

It’s kind of always been there. A voice prowling the back of his head, growling and grumbling that this is what he’s supposed to do.

Steve is uncertain that he actually likes guys, because when you like someone you’re supposed to be sexually attracted to them, too, right?

Words : 2,533 Chapters : 1/1 Rating : Teen and Up Audiences

AO3 : x

Conversations About Love

MuseumGiftShopEraser

Steve gets his heart absolutely shattered in a bathroom at a random Halloween party. He storms off so no one can tell he’s on the verge of tears and finds Eddie Munson smoking a joint in the master bedroom.

Steve pours his heart out and tells Eddie that he just can’t get it to come naturally with Nancy. No matter how hard he tries so play at romance, he can’t love her the way he’s supposed to.

Eddie, who’s known he’s queer since middle school, sees something of himself in Steve. But as their friendship progresses into something more, Steve has to confront the fact that he might not be gay after all.

Words : 41,803 Chapters : 9/9 Rating : Mature

AO3 : x

Under the Light of the Evening Star

greenflower209

Eddie and Steve talk about sexuality and find a new sort of comfort in each other

Words : 1,153 Chapters : 1/1 Rating : General Audiences

AO3 : x

you are so magnetic

the_maybe

Steve and Eddie kiss. Eddie is not into it.

Words : 886 Chapters : 1/1 Rating : Mature

AO3 : x

Amour Déroutant

aromanticsteddie

“I think I’m broken, Robs.”

Robin was half asleep, and Steve would have felt bad about disturbing her had he not been staring silently outside for hours upon hours. She shook her head above him, where his was resting on her chest. “No, you’re not, Stevie.” She made it sound so simple. If she thought it was, then it must be, right?

Words : 3,750 Chapters : 2/2 Rating : General Audiences

AO3 : x

mixing it up

Isabelle Hemlock (isabelle_hemlock)

Steve seemed to perk up when Eddie hadn’t outright declined the offer, but his brain was still catching up to the legitimacy of his words, utterly unprepared for the way Steve’s restrained smile now widened as he tipped his head to make his eyes look even more round and beautiful, “But if that’s your only hesitation then let’s move forward to the planning portion of a date.”

Date, Eddie’s mind repeated, sputtering back into motion, date that thing where people - “What - exactly would a date with you look like?”

Words : 7,369 Chapters : 3/3 Rating : Mature

AO3 : x

cw: ableist language

+ Bonus Stobin

Describing Colours

envyenvy

Two unknowingly closeted aromantics try to explain crushes to each other, it goes about as well as can be expected.

Words : 7,374 Chapters : 1/1 Rating : Teen and Up Audiences

AO3 : x

#stranger things #steve harrington #eddie munson #steddie #fic rec #ficrec #sorry if I've been missing little content warnings in other fics that haven't been tagged #it just stuck out to me in that one fic that wasn't tagged so #needed to add a lil note

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canonmisogynyvictimstournament · 7 months

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PROPAGANDA

SUSAN PEVENSIE (THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA)

1.) (Reusing my propaganda from a previous poll, I promise I wrote it, and I’m not typing all that again)

So what if she liked makeup, Clive. So what if she was interested in boys? Who cares if she wanted to keep her dress looking neat? You took every single protagonist to weird lion heaven, Clive, but suddenly Susan isn’t good enough. Susan did nothing to deserve the sudden turn in characterization, she did nothing to deserve being the only character to be condemned. SOMEbody (lookin’ at you, Clive Staples) was just a raging misogynist who wanted girls and women to be really clear on the fact the betraying your siblings nearly to death was forgivable, but being interested in feminine things and taking pride in your appearance was punishable by death. “"Lipsticks and nylons and invitations”“, the fucking horror.

Because you were writing a fun fantasy story for us, right Clive? Magic and dragons and animals that talk. But you fucking weren’t. You were writing an indoctrination story for us, weren’t you? And you needed someone to represent those empty headed young people who turn away from the church’s rules. And so you decided that Susan had become too grown up and you massacred her.

2.) Is deemed “no longer a friend” of Jesus’ fursona’s kingdom because she cares too much about “nylons, lipstick, and invitations”. Both of parents and all three of her siblings die in a train crash at the end and her feelings about this are never considered or acknowledged.

RIVER TAM (FIREFLY) (CW: Ableism)

1.) Being a woman written by Joss Whedon should automatically entitle her to financial compensation tbh. No but okay so River is a super genius girl, & at age like 14 she gets sent to an “academy” that allegedly was a government school for gifted kids but was actually a government facility for experimenting on (read: torturing) said gifted kids. Her brother breaks her out by having someone smuggle her out of the school (naked. btw. she’s snuggled out & transported naked & kept unconscious in a fancy storage crate. she is also 16) & they end up on the spaceship with the main cast, who take her & her brother in as fugitives while also being so so so ableist (she has, understandably, MASSIVE ptsd from the everything, but her trauma also gave her psychic powers & turned her ~insane~) & lots of truly gross misogynistic & sexual comments from Jayne in particular about her. All of this is of course depicted with so much sensitivity & care (lying). Anyway I want joss whedon dead in a ditch thanks for coming to my Ted talk

2.) She is a really cool superpowered character that is used as a vehicle for Whedon’s fetishes. There is at least one shot that has an uncomfortably long close-up of her feet. She also spies on her brother and another character having sex. She’s the epitome of the “Born Sexy Yesterday” trope, very innocent while also being treated as a sex object.

3.) Named after the river Ophelia drowned in, thus clearly being based on another CMV. A super soldier whose physical strength was augmented by scientific experimentation, so of course her physique is… super slender and delicate (typical of women written by Joss Whedon). The series includes a lot of focus on her bare feet (also typical of women written by Joss Whedon).

#polls #round 2 #week 4 #new

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sunshiline-writes · 6 months

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A Rose Amidst Thorns #7: Anger Arrives

Oh boy, this chapter is ROUGH. PLEASE HEED WARNINGS THAT I POST BC THIS IS A WILD ONE. -- Miguel finishes his punishment and Solomon stands up to Xavier after seeing what has been made of his ward. CW: Whumper POV, deaf whumpee, defiant whumpee, ableist language, suggestive comments and actions but nothing super sexual actually happens, broken bones, nailed to the wall, removing nails from hands, Xavier being a CREEP, sadistic whumper, intimate whumper, threats, fingerfucking a hand hole (I am so sorry), whumpee is referred to as a kid but is an adult, dissassociation, blink and you miss it mention of disordered eating, Xavier doesn't know how to keep his hands to himself, uhhhh I think that's it.. but like... let me know if I missed anything -- Previous | Masterlist | Next

Xavier was not one to stay angry for very long. He released his anger once and it was done. This time however, he’d been holding onto the anger for a long time. Three years against Miguel, against Henrietta. It festered and bubbled and destroyed him. Now he would destroy them from the bottom of their souls, break them up, and then put them back together again. Xavier loved putting people back together. Molding them, shaping them. Humans were so malleable once they were broken down to their core functions.

Lately it seemed though, that Miguel was constantly needing to be broken down, shapened, and broken down again. Miguel was someone who took a little more finesse than what he was used to. Perhaps it was because he started young. Or perhaps it was because Miguel was just that stubborn. Whatever the case, it made Xavier’s blood boil.

When he made his way back into the barn, the anger was still there. Xavier walked directly up to the boy and sighed, taking in the sight. Blood ran down his arms, dripping from his elbows. His white undershirt was soaked in blood and covered in dirt. Every muscle in his body was wound tightly. He was still on the tips of his toes, trying not to hang from the nails in his hands, his calves shaking. Sweat dripped down the sides of his face. It was his hands though, they looked the worst. His right one, the one he had broken, was swollen, purple and misshapen. It was so swollen he almost couldn’t see where the nail had been embedded in the middle of his hand. Xavier smiled to himself, admitting that he admired his handiwork. Miguel’s head rested on the harsh wood, the bridle still in his mouth, teeth clenched down on it. A good distraction, Xavier assumed, from the pain of everywhere else.

Slowly, he ran a hand over the bit, halfway in his mouth, pressing a finger against his tongue, this caused Miguel to open his eyes, breathing hitching. His eyes were cloudy with pain. Xavier pressed down harder on Miguel's tongue, just to see him squirm before retreating his hand. Miguel dipped his head low, staring at his boots.

Xavier watched him. An old memory of when he first met the boy flashed in his mind. Scared and hiding behind his father, having to be dragged away kicking and screaming from his family. It didn’t matter. Fighting never got him anywhere. Another memory of the boy holding the gun, pointed straight at him. Xavier wasn’t afraid then, but the anger flashed hot in his stomach now. The kid had always been a pain.

Reaching out, Xavier wrapped a hand around Miguel's throat, forcing Miguel's head up, grinning from ear to ear. The boy looked up at him. He was met not with pain or even a blank expression like Xavier had originally suspected. Instead he was met with an icy glare. A smile tugged at the corner of Xavier’s lips.

“Do you hate me Miguel?” he asked, enunciating, speaking slowly so he could read.

Miguel’s glare faded and he gritted his teeth on the metal bit in his mouth, the sound vibrating through the boy's throat and Xavier laughed. Pressing his head against Miguels forehead. The boy winced as he pressed his head farther into the wall behind him trying to get away. But he couldn’t get away. There was nowhere to go. His family was gone and no one wanted a defective person working for them. Xavier didn’t want him at first. But after the first time that the boy pointed a gun at him, Xavier knew that breaking him would be a fight well earned. It had been fun and interesting to see what broke the boy down, slowly, bit by bit. Sometimes it was successful, other times less so.

This was one of those times that it was a strange mix of the two. Xavier gave Miguels throat a little squeeze. “I asked a question..” he said, stepping back slightly.

Miguel nodded his head slightly, movement restricted by the bridle.

“Oh Miguel.. You don’t have to lie. I saw the way you looked at me. You don’t hate me, you fear me.” Miguel’s eyes were wide, tears starting to stream down his face. “I like you like this. Afraid, in pain, you’re so much less of a problem like this,” a choked sob came from the boy beneath him. Miguel shook his head and closed his eyes. Xavier could hear the way Miguel’s teeth grinded against the metal in his mouth. His grin widened. It was like hearing a real horse chew on the bit. The thought amused him.

Xavier squeezed again, a choking sound came from the boy but he still didn’t open his eyes. Stubborn mule. His hand retreated from his throat and instead went to his back pocket where the bandana hung loosely. He took it out. It was annoying how much he fought him. Fought what was about to happen, as if he could stop it. Well, if he wasn’t going to open his eyes to listen to him, he didn’t need them right now anyway. Xavier had thought about it before, permanently blinding Miguel, but always decided against it. There was no use in keeping around a blind and deaf person, not unless they wanted what was an equivalent to a corpse stumbling around. The blindfold usually did the job anyway.

Instead his palm connected with Miguel’s face, the slap loud but not nearly enough to make a lasting mark. However, it was enough for Miguel to open his eyes with a groan as he slipped and hung by the nails in his hands for a second. Another whimper escaped him and Xavier grinned.

“If you won’t look at me, if you won’t listen, I think you deserve the blindfold,” he stated simply. Dangling the blindfold in front of Miguels face, who was now breathing more heavily than before and shaking harder. He could almost see how he normally responded, the index and middle finger pressing onto the thumb. The simple ‘no’ sign. It was the first sign he ever learned. The first word he saw Miguel speak to his parents. “Shhhh,” he cooed, starting to wrap the black bandana around his eyes, tighter than he assumed was comfortable, and tied it around the back of his head, the knot tangling in his hair. It wasn’t about his comfort anyway, he ignored the way his stomach dropped at the way Miguel whimpered and shifted his stance slightly. Scared and unable to guage his surroundings. It was his favorite punishment for Miguel at times. It happened less often now. But he always loved the way his body tensed and he strained to understand what was happening to him. The stress of not knowing what was happening, it was exhausting to Miguel. Made his light go out faster. It was why it was a favorite of Xaviers. It was also the fact that Miguel just looked so good blindfolded and shaking like this. He trailed his fingers up Miguels Adams apple, pressing into the soft flesh under his jaw. Xavier dragged his fingers up to the side of his jaw and traced the outline of it. Cupping the boy's cheek, he kissed his forehead again. Sighing softly. “I’ll take you down now. Just a few more things..” he whispered, he knew that the boy could not hear him, couldn’t even tell that he was talking, but sometimes talking outloud helped with the thought process. Xavier left for a moment to grab the hammer. He thought for a moment about hitting his broken hand again with it, but at the look of it, it did not need to be more broken. It would be hard enough dealing with it the way it was.

It was hard to find where the nail had gone in, the hand was so swollen. But he found the area quickly and with an amount of gentleness that surprised himself, he used the claw of the hammer to pry the nail out. Miguel screamed as the nail left his hand and it was left dangling by the cuff Xavier had put on earlier. The boy groaned and shuddered lightly as he used the claw to pull the nail from his other hand. Then he let the boy hang from the cuffs.

Miguel was sobbing, barely holding himself up, head bowed. Xavier stared at him, just watching for a moment. How sad it was, that the boy had been reduced to this sobbing, whimpering thing. When he had first arrived at the ranch, he was all fire and all bite. Now he was a good little dog, hanging by broken hands. He took the boy down from the nails on the wall, positioning him on the floor.

“Good, good, you’re so good for me Miguel,” he cooed gently, running a hand in his hair as the man beneath him withered on the ground. He took a deep breath and pressed his forehead against Miguels, kissing the tip of his nose. Pulling back, smiling at the thing below him. That is, until he was hit with a sudden wetness on his cheek. Did he just.. spit on him?

“What the fuck?” He wiped the wetness off his cheek, looking down at the smiling expression on Miguel. “You never learn do you? Never. Fucking. Learn.” Every word was punctuated by Xavier forcing his hands above his head, straddling him, and then panting. “I give you clothes, shelter, a job. I make you fucking useful, and you still never learn. You’ll never learn. I should really just kill you. It would be a load off my mind. But..” one of his hands that held onto Miguels wrists, let it go, his other hand still held firm. With his free hand, he pressed a finger into the hole in the hand that wasn’t broken. The one that he could still hurt. “Does this hurt Miguel?” Miguel opened his mouth and the bit was pressed further into his mouth, making him choke. Xavier pressed his finger deeper in and finally, he heard what he wanted to hear as Miguel screamed again, choking on air. Coughing and sputtering on his own spit. Xavier pressed harder into the wound, slick with blood, now he was so deep into his hand that he couldn’t see his first knuckle. Still he pressed harder and further, until he could feel the dirt on the other side of his hand and he stopped when his second knuckle disappeared into the wound. He marveled that Miguel was even still awake. But he was kicking and screaming under him. Miguels knee slammed into Xavier’s back slightly and that only made Xavier angrier. His finger curled into the wound and he pulled slightly, feeling bone and tendons shift. There was a certain giddiness that he felt over it. Miguels hand clenched and he turned his face, screaming again.

The boy would not stop screaming. That didn’t bother Xavier, not really, it was what he wanted. There was a point after Xavier pulled his finger back and then pushed back in that Miguel stopped screaming. Instead opting to groan and sob quietly. Yes.. yes he was getting it now. The silence that Xavier often asked for. He was so close to being good again for him. He pulled his finger out so only the tip of it rested against the wound, then plunged it back in, curling it again.

“This is different from what I usually do. I think the difference is welcome though,” he said with a laugh. Then he continued to finger the wound, still not satisfied as the boy eventually stopped groaning and the only sound that came from him were quiet whimpers. Too weak to even try to fight back. Even Xavier was panting by the time he even thought about retracting his finger. He curled and pulled at the wound, widening the hole slightly, one last time before he looked up.

“What are you.. doing?” Solomon asked, voice tense, expression hard.

“Having a little fun,” Xavier responded cooly, despite the cold shiver that went down his spine. The anger that radiated off Solomon could be felt throughout the barn. It was thick in the air.

“You’re done now,” Solomon said, it was not a request. He was telling him that he was done.

“I am now?”

“Yes, you are. Uncuff him, take that bridle off and get your damn finger out of his wound. You’re going to cause an infection.”

Xavier sat there for a moment longer before licking his lips. He did follow the orders from Solomon though, retracting the finger and uncuffing the boy. Then he removed the blindfold and the horse bit. The boy was panting under him, eyes closed still and face stained with tears. Xavier gently stroked his face, tapping his eyelid gently.

When Miguel opened his eyes, his expression was different. Good that was exactly what he wanted. His eyes were full of pain and of fear. “Good. You did good,” and when Xavier kissed his forehead one more time, Miguel did not flinch. Then he stood up, using the bandana that was damp with tears to wipe the blood from his hands. “All yours Solomon,” he said to the man with a smirk.

*** Solomon was not an angry man. Not usually. But at the moment, it wouldn’t take much for him to snap Xavier’s neck in two. Especially after that smirk. It was the smirk that made him see red. He clenched his fists, clenched his teeth and waited for Xavier to pass him and leave the barn before he rushed to Miguel.

Gently he picked up the boys torso and held the limp body close. “You’re okay Miguel. You’re okay. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry,” he whispered softly, taking the boy's hands, covered in blood and grime. He looked them over. Purple, red, swollen. It was awful. He’d seen worse, but his right hand was something that he could never repair wholly. There was a chance that Miguel would lose all feeling in that hand alone. His left hand had a hole through it that would have “Oh god,” he whispered. Solomon shook his head and gently looked at the boy's face, he seemed to be staring far away. Not even registering Solomon's appearance, or the fact that Xavier had left.

“Miguel, look at me. You have to look at me,” he said to him, gently cupping his cheek and moving his face so that he looked at him. If Solomon didn’t know better, he would have guessed that the boy was dead. But he was still breathing. He blinked at him slowly and tears came to his eyes again. “There you are. You’re safe. You’re safe..”

Then Miguel was sobbing, curling into Solomon's chest, hands unmoving. He buried his face into Solomon's shirt, in the space between his shoulder and chest. “Shhh.. Shhh,” he begged quietly, one hand holding Miguel's head for support. Miguel pulled his face away, eyes glazed with pain. Hands twitching. “No no… don’t try to move them. I have to carry you now okay?” Solomon told him, the hand on the back of his head slid to his back, and his other arm cradling Miguel's knees. Then he lifted, staggering to his feet.

Miguel was surprisingly light and Solomon made a mental note that after he gave the morphine, he’d make Miguel eat something. Miguel cried out when his hands shifted onto his stomach, curling tighter. “I know, I know. I’m sorry.” As he walked to the house, Solomon thought of Henrietta. He wanted to blame her. It would be so easy too. But blame never did anyone any good. The only blame that was deserved was Xaviers. He was the one that hurt them, he was the one that threatened them all into compliance, hurt them when they didn’t abide. It was all his fault. Every single piece of this was his fault. Solomon glanced down at Miguel who’s eyes were closed, his body was trembling.

Miguel was going to need a splint, antibiotics, pain control.. There was so much that Miguel needed right now. Solomon couldn’t possibly do everything all at once. Or maybe he could. If he could get the morphine at just the right dose to let him fall asleep… Yes that was what he would start with. The morphine.

Solomon walked up the steps of the house, walking through the open door. Then he immediately took Miguel to his room. Solomon’s room was small, only a bed, dresser and bed stand was in it. He never saw a reason to add anything else. He laid Miguel into the bed, letting Miguel curl in on himself for the moment. While Miguel made himself comfortable, Solomon grabbed his medical bag under the bed. Shuffling through it for a moment, he grabbed the morphine bottle and the needle he needed. He filled it to what he thought was sufficient enough, and he didn’t tell Miguel when he injected the needle into his shoulder. He just did so, stroking his hair until Miguel's breathing evened out and he stopped trembling.

“Will he be okay?” came the voice from the doorway as Solomon manuevered Miguel to lay on his back as gently as possible.

“Leave,” Solomon said, gently taking Miguel’s hands in his. “Now.”

“You’re in a mood right now so I'll let that go..” Xavier said, leaning against the doorway. “It was a simple question.” “No. He is not okay. You took his hands,” Solomon said, trying to keep the anger out of his voice. From Xavier’s smirk, he wasn’t doing a very good job at that.

“So?”

“So, he can’t..” Solomon almost said communicate but that wouldn’t prove anything to Xavier. In fact, Xavier would probably laugh at that. Solomon could hear the snarky comment about how Miguel didn’t talk anyway. He didn’t need to communicate to work. All things he’d said before. So instead he tried a different route, “he can’t work. You destroyed his hands and he can’t work for the foreseeable future. He can’t grab the saddles or the leads for the horses. Let alone carry things with these hands for months at the very least.” As he spoke, Solomon cleaned out the wounds, disinfecting them with care so he didn’t cause so much pain as to wake the sleeping figure on the bed. “You put him out of commission as your saddle boy,” Solomon finished. Glancing up at Xavier. Xavier seemed to be contemplating his words for a moment, expression pensive, before it warped into a grin. “He has other uses.”

“No,” came the automatic reply.

Xavier let out a snort. “Get your mind out of the mud Solomon. I was going to suggest simple house work.”

“You’re disgusting,” Solomon said, returning his attention to Miguel’s hand as he set up the splint. Every touch of the boy's right hand made Miguel whimper and groan in his sleep. Pain shot through Solomon's chest and he shoved it down. He could deal with that later. He could try and understand this later. For now he had to focus on the here and now. Like right now, there was a new tension in the room. Xavier pushed himself from leaning against the doorframe. “Watch your words Solomon. I never had to hurt you before, don’t give me a reason to do so now. I know plenty of ways to hurt you without rendering you unable to do your job.”

Solomon finished the splint, gently placing Miguel’s hand down on the bed. Then he stood from his chair and stood up looking Xavier in the eye. “Here is what is going to happen. I don’t want you or Jesse touching him until I say. He needs to heal and if you or Jesse slow down that progress I will do unspeakable things. I am a doctor but I will not hesitate to use my knowledge to cause pain, instead of relieving it,” he watched Xaviers blank expression shift slightly, “do you understand me Xavier?”

The silence felt like it was eating him inside, but he did not falter before Xavier smiled again. “Ah, so you didn’t lose that backbone I admired so much back in the day.”

“Do you understand me Xavier?”

Xavier waved his hand in a dismissive fashion and glanced back at Miguel on the bed. “Yeah yeah. I understand you. No touching until he’s all healed up right?”

“Correct.”

“Understood doctor.” Xavier said with a chuckle, “he’ll have to make up for all the work he missed later. But it’ll never get this bad again. He took the punishment well and I’m sure you and Etta will make up for it too, yes?”

Solomon thought for a moment before nodding. “Yes. We can do that.”

“Good, good. Very good Solomon. I’ll let you continue your work then,” Xavier grabbed one of Solomon's braids and gave it a playful tug. It made Solomon's skin crawl. Like he had just touched a part of his soul. Which he technically did, but.. Solomon tried hard not to think about it. Xavier grinned, letting go of his hair, turning around and leaving.

Solomon collapsed into the chair next to the bed.

“I’m so sorry Miguel. I’ll get you out of here soon. I promise,” he said to the sleeping figure, rubbing a thumb along Miguel's forearm.

This time, this time he meant it.

This would be a promise that he was going to keep. Even if it killed him. Even if he had to sacrifice everything. Miguel and Henrietta deserved better than this. They deserved freedom. Solomon was going to do everything in his power to get them there. He just had to be patient and not let the anger in.

But the anger was already here. No, he just had to control it now.

He could do that.

Solomon had to do that.

For them. __

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