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ridiculouslly-ridiculous · 1 year

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In My Head (On My Mind)

Pairing: Semi Eita X Fem!Reader

Genre: Angst/ hurt no comfort

Tw/Cw: unhealthy coping mechanisms, alcohol consumption, skipping meals, NSFW, unspecified previous sexual encounters (Im sorry if I missed anything, if I did please let me know!)

Word Count: 679

Reposting because the first time was an absolute flop 😔 This was inspired by the song In My Head (On My Mind) by MOTi

The heavy bass reverberates throughout the club which helps you grind your hips into the unknown man for the night. His face buried in your neck and his hands have a firm grip on you, and although it’s a welcomed feeling, you still feel slightly repulsed by this sleazy man. But you need this. The strange man you’ve seduced tonight is definitely feeling more comfortable with you as his hands leave the familiarity of your hips and begin to wander around the rest of your body. His hands leave an invisible trail of filth as he explores your dress-clad body with his grimy hands. His hands go for your ass first, grabbing it as if he’s never held one before. His hands move to your thighs and tries to turn you on by rubbing, but his inconsistency in rhythm fails to do so. His hands then move upward to grope your tits. He feels your nipples underneath the fabric on your dress, you feel him smirk into your neck, probably thinking it was his doing and not the air conditioner. As he explores, you try to imagine it’s not him and that it’s your now ex-boyfriend doing this to your body.

Your body which is now a few pounds lighter than just a couple of weeks ago. Your body which has been sustained more by alcohol than proper meals. Your body which has found itself in the company of more strange men than ever before. Your body which has been on the hunt for the high it so desperately craves but has failed to find.

You and Semi broke up a little over three weeks ago — well, Semi broke up with you. His band was leaving for tour for months on end and didn’t want it to cause a strain on your relationship, so he decided for himself that it would be better if he ended it. Although he swore up and down that was the reason for the termination of your relationship, that small voice in the back of your mind was convinced otherwise. Your three year relationship ended as if it meant nothing to him. As if all the time you spent together never happened. You were there when the band first started and how desperately Semi searched for people to join his band. You helped him put up flyers in music shops, listen to demos — the good and the bad, and you were there as the band recorded their first everything. All of that and now here you are, paying the fee of a broken heart. And no matter what you’ve done these past few weeks, nothing has made you forget the man who you thought was the love of your life.

Everything you did somehow reminded you of him. Watching TV? Semi. Eating a scarce dinner? Semi. Throwing back shots? Semi. Getting your back blown out by a stranger? Semi. Trying to fall asleep and failing? Semi. And now he’s somewhere maybe in Japan or a different country doing who knows what.

No longer yours.

Now you long to be the girl before you met Semi. Before this heartache, slowly consuming your heart and leaving nothing behind, came to be. You know it’s a lost cause but you finally turn around, coming face-to-face with tonight’s strange man and kiss him. As you are making out with this strange man, something feels different and it’s not because it’s a good kiss. No. Something inside of your head clicks. Maybe it was because out of the corner of your eye during your sloppy make out session with the man whose name you’ve already forgotten you see a man who looks a lot like Semi staring at you. But Semi could be doing this exact thing right now as well. It was at this moment the raging storm in your heart makes landfall and you know the damage will be irreparable. And all you can do in the moment is pretend the man who you’re going to fuck tonight is that silver haired man who broke your heart.

Likes, replies, and reblogs are always welcome and appreciated <3

#🎼 — kats compositions #haikyuu!!#haikyū!!#hq x reader #semi eita x you #semi eita x reader #semi eita #hq #haikyuu #haikyuu!#haikyuu angst #semi Eita angst

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ilylovelyz · 9 months

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hi omg i love your works ,, would you ever write eita semi smut?

⍣ ೋ captain save a hoe

˚ · . semi x afab!reader

: ̗̀➛ semi is a nasty band member, audio recording, i promise semi loves reader tho, cheating, semi-public sex, cockwarmimg, ofc ill do semi eita smut he's like one of the prettiest haikyuu boys >.<

yeah, you wanna kill me 'cuz i fucked ya bitch

semi's hands fondle and stay on your ass, his lips capturing yours into a lazy kiss.

despite the seriousness of this all, you still can't help but grin against his lips, giggling when you feel him reciprocating your contagious smile. "stop it~," you squeal, wrapping your hands around his neck while you readjust your grip of your legs around his waist.

"you're cute," he rasps, his hands still firm against your ass. his eyes are low, full of love and lust as he holds you against him. "you're cute too," you praise back, one of your hands reaching up to entangle with his soft grey locks.

you're currently sitting on his lap, the only thing still on you from the previous evening is your bandeau top and thong. semi is wearing everything aside from his shirt, his pants and boxers pulled down to his thighs. your thong is pulled to the side, his cock fully sheathed into your warm walls.

the two of you have been in this position for almost an hour, basking in each other's presence. neither of you feel a twinge of guilt nor shame, you just can't help yourselves. he can't help the way he's drawn to you, nor help the way his cock twitches at the sight of your short denim skirt. you can't help the way you ignore your boyfriend's many phone-calls, too enamored by the sweet attention the famous band member gives you.

some will call it adultery, the two of you call it love.

"hey, i wanna try something with you." he whispers against your skin, placing sweet open-mouthed kisses against your collarbone. "hm? what is it?" you asks curiously, goosebumps rising on your skin at his warm touches.

he's pulling away from you at that, circling the spinning chair the two of you are in. there's a static hum coming from the audio-speaker when he presses a certain button before it silences when he presses another.

you're eyes widen with curiosity and surprise when he's then pulling a microphone towards your lips. "y-you want me to sing?" you ask bewildered, eyebrow raised with curiosity.

he smirks cheekily at your question. you gasp out when he's suddenly thrusting sharply into you, your hand gripping at his shoulder for purchase. "no, i want you to moan," he casually says, watching with amusement as you subconsciously moan and mewl into the microphone.

a couple of weeks later, your now ex-boyfriend is blowing your phone up with calls and texts, asking for an explanation after you sent him a link to semi's new song, featuring you and your sweet moans.

please leave a like and repost with tags :)

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hiraethwa · 4 months

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the collection - one summer day

pairing: ushijima x reader summary: where you did not expect to fall for shiratorizawa's future ace warnings: slice of life, strangers to friends, friends to lovers, fluff, angst, childhood trauma, swearing, set in 2010 (2 years before the pre-timeskip events), maybe some smut, best friend!semi, (did i mention angst??) a/n: rewatching haikyuu which has inspired me to write again after 5 years of break... this is going to be a long ride so buckle in folks! thank you for your support! tags: send me an ask to be tagged!

࿐00 guidepost. ࿐01 clear skies. ࿐02 fly high. ࿐03 shining light. ࿐04 new dawn. ࿐05 saturn i. ࿐06 saturn ii. ࿐07 sun and moon. ࿐08 (coming soon)

updates every other wednesday

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strwbrryeyes · 12 days

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𖦹°｡⋆ haikyuu boys as my breakup playlist pt.3

⟡ featuring: hinata, semi, iwaizumi, kenma

⟡ cw: angst, mentions of cheating, heart broken hinata my baby, these also might be longer than the last two whoops. also can you tell i was angry while writing kenma's? ps thank you for 200 followers mwah<3

⟡ an: its that time again (waterparks ((fandom)) edition bc im obsessed)

⟡ part one, part two

⟡ hinata shoyo: never bloom again - waterparks

You and Hinata dated for four years from your first year of high school to your first year of university. Honestly, it could have been a lifelong relationship if it weren’t for Brazil. Hinata told you he was leaving the week after graduation. After telling you, you cried and yelled at him, pounding at his chest while crying ‘how could you do this to me?’ in between sobs but after a while, you had calmed down and you agreed to try a long distance relationship. Hinata visited you whenever he could, holidays, your birthdays, any reason to see you but it wasn’t enough for you. Hinata would always be everything to you but you couldn’t bear the fact that he was so far away, and sure you both called and texted each other but the time difference between Brazil and Japan made it difficult and Hinata could see it in your eyes whenever he visited, whenever you sent him a picture of yourself, whenever you facetimed…you were tired. It got to the point where you would cry yourself to sleep almost every night because you missed him and just wanted to be by his side, so with so much hesitation, you called him one night and told Hinata you couldn’t do this anymore. You needed him, not his texts, not his calls, no matter how much you loved them, you needed him physically there with you. Hinata protested and said that he wold move back to Japan for you but you couldn’t let him do that, you knew how important it was for him to be in Brazil to better his volleyball skills, so he finally gave in and you broke up after a year of long distance. Another year later, Hinata moved back to Japan after two years of being in Brazil, meaning he could see you again, he hoped so at least. Hinata didn’t know what you’ve been up to as you broke off communication with each other after the break up to avoid the pain of being in eachother’s lives. Hinata had his hopes up and was telling Yachi and Yamaguchi his plan to win you back but quickly had them crushed when they told him you had moved to Europe to finish university so you could start a new life. You didn’t want to be in Japan anymore, stuck with all the memories the both of you had made. It was too painful. Now it was Hinata’s turn. He was surrounded by the memories, everything reminded him of you, every now and then he’d see someone from across the street and see your face only for it to not be you, just some stranger. Hinata was never the same, even if he seemed happy and well, he was breaking inside constantly like he would never be truly happy again.

⟡ eita semi: worst - waterparks

You and Semi have been dating since middle school, practically inseparable. you and Semi were both in your 20s now and life has not stopped a single bit. The both of you were currently in the music industry, with Semi and his band being one of the biggest groups rising to stardom in the world and with you being a songwriter. You’ve always been a behind-the-scenes type person so you never really went out to parties or to big events. Semi, however, was a social person…at least on the party scene. It was a chance for him to let loose and not let worries get in his way, and who are you to take that away from him? The trust you and Semi had for eachother was strong, after all, you guys have been dating for years so why wouldn’t you? With this being the case, you never had any doubt about him going on tour without you. You still had other clients to write for so you couldn’t go with him but you never once worried about what he would do. That was until you were hanging out with your friends, Tendou and Ushijima, and they mentioned how Semi seemed different, that he seemed more careless and emotionless. You assured them that there was nothing different about him but when you went home that night you kept thinking about everything and looked back at how life has been since Semi has gained fame…he hadn’t changed. No. He was still the same Semi you fell in love with all those years ago. Sure he had questionable friends that made you uncomfortable, but he wasn’t like them, he always had girls lining up for a chance with him but he never gave them a chance…at least you think so. Regardless, you’re sure everything was fine and plus you were going to surprise him at his show in Tokyo! Any worry that you have will be wiped away when you see him all you had to do was wait. So you did. The day of the Tokyo show finally came up and you were standing at his dressing room doorway with tears in your eyes as you look at the sight in front of you- Semi and some random girl all over each other. Semi knew you were there, but he didn’t even care, all he did was give you a side glance before going back to the other girl. After that, you went home and changed all of the locks, removed all the pictures of him, blocked him on everything, and wrote a song that was sure to ruin his reputation out of anger, but even after all of that, you were still stuck with a giant hole in your heart and you don’t think it could ever be filled.

⟡ iwaizumi hajime: i felt younger when we met - waterparks

It all started four years ago when Iwaizumi moved to California for college. You both had known each other for 2 years prior to graduating and it was pretty obvious to other people that you two had a thing for each other but it wasn’t until after he had moved that either of you said something. Iwaizumi was the first to say he liked you, infact he said he loved you. It didn’t take long for your young and dumb self to transfer to where he was studying. You were both in love and naive so neither of you really thought about this big change in depth. The first two years of your relationship were perfect, you both got good grades, you had moved into a small apartment together, and you were both happy, you really couldn’t ask for more. Even though you and Iwaizumi were living the ideal love life, everyone else in your lives thought you guys rushed into things. The two of you weren’t even that close to begin with, you were just classmates in high school who had kiddie crushes on each other. It really all came down to the honeymoon phase, nothing was ever wrong and you never argued. It wasn’t until your third year of dating that you both realized that your life goals were very different from each other and this of course caused a ripple in your relationship. Wanting to be supportive of each other and your dreams, you set your goals aside for now and planned to come up with a compromise when the time called for it. Things were kind of back to normal until you both started learning more about one another. Bad habits you each had, sense of humor you didn’t share, different views, really whatever you could think of you both would disagree with one another and you were starting to get on eachother’s nerves. Iwaizumi reached the end of his rope quicker than you did. He ended things in the middle of a heated argument of something you can’t even remember because the only thing you were worried about at that moment was him packing up all of his things and walking out that apartment door but at the same time, you didn’t care. You had officially fallen out of love with him even though you never thought you could. Now whenever you think of him, all you could think about was how you uprooted your life for him. You moved across the world and for what? Nothing but anger and disgust filled you whenever you thought of all the moments you shared with him. To think of how different everything could have been if you two had just taken your time and not rushed into the relationship.

⟡ kozume kenma: easy to hate you - waterparks

Honestly, Kenma got on your nerves quite often. It was nothing you weren’t used to though because it was always simple things like him not doing the dishes whenever he was done eating or him spending too much time playing video games. Your annoyance never came from anything serious, just simple relationship stuff. When his streaming career started taking off, you never really bothered him to do anything around your shared house. It was only fair since it generated enough income for you to quit your part time job as a waitress and focus on school more. This doesn’t mean that it still didn’t annoy you that Kenma would seemingly spend more time playing video games than spending time with you whenever you had free time. Sometimes he would invite you onto stream so you two could ‘bond’ but it never felt right, to you it felt like you were more of a prop for his audience, like he would spend time with you only because his fansloved watching the two of you interact. Still, you brushed it off because it was still nice to be able to make him laugh whenever you did something silly in a game or said something funny. It also didn’t hurt that sometimes he would get all lovey dovey on camera making you swoon, even if it did feel fake at times. In the end, you thought it was the best you and Kenma could do considering the circumstances, you being in college and streaming being Kenma’s full time job. Kenma had promised you that once you winter break started, that he would put a hold on streaming so the both of you could spend time together and it excited you so it was only natural that you were pissed off when winter break finally came and Kenma said that he had sponsorships to deal with on stream. He said it isn’t something that could be helped but you snapped back saying that he could have scheduled these sponsored streams during any other time. Kenma didn’t care about what you said and just stayed in his streaming room for most of the two weeks. You started to ease a bit though once he started streaming for shorter amounts of times and spent more time with you during the day. You were finally happy with your relationship after who knows how long but then he decided that you being on a break from school would be the perfect time to do a 48 hour subathon. All you wanted was to spend time with your boyfriend but instead he just used you to gain more viewers. Again. Still, you agreed to do it agreeing that it would be fun but really yo had a plan. Three hours into the stream you said you have an announcement and everyone, including Kenma thought it would be something happy and big, but really, you were about to publicly dump him. After your little speech on how selfish Kenma actually was, you called one of your best friends to come pick you up and told Kenma that you would be back for your stuff the next day. You were finally free from the one-sided relationship you should have left sooner but now Kenma was rethinking all his choices as he scrolls through tweets talking about the breakup stream. At least it made him go viral.

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azaarchiive · 2 months

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ᥫ✦azariah’s solar system

notes: hi guys, this is just something for origination and practicality l. i do take suggestions btw! open to anything except noncom, bodily fluids (except for the white one) or anything glorified abuse or anything of the sort. pls submit smth wanna prove im a good writer. proper rules list will be coming soon tho.

Haikyuu

semi eita

• holiday girlfriend - ON HOLD

- you were one of semi’s many flings every time he flew to (country), always waiting for him with open arms. what happens when he comes back to a baby bump? (series)

hinata shoyo

• only the elite

- y/n is stinking rich and shoyo is the complete opposite. what happens when y/n oddly falls for him despite her equally rich friends and boyfriend and introduces him to the fucked up life in hiroo (series)

oikawa tooru

• blackout

- a cute little fluffy one shot about a blackout in your neighbourhood and what you both do to pass that time

MHA

• fanfic bakugou vs real size

- katsuki finds you reading a fanfic about him (one shot)

JJK

gojo satoru

• be mine?

- satoru is never second, so why aren’t you with him right now? (one shot) (valentine’s special)

• countdown

- your new year was welcomed with a kiss from the one and only gojo satoru. womaniser of the east quickly sees the damage it’s caused and starts to generate a little white lie pertaining both of your marital status to try and salvage both (mostly his) reputation. (smau) (series)

TO BE MADE: theres quite a few spoiler alert

unlikely paring; atsumu miya

• “being blamed for a school fire and going from the it girl to an arson freak is not ideal. the school luckily scavengers its losses and it rebuilt but something seems different, especially after a dead body is found. now you have to team up with the only guy that knows you’re innocent despite him being your biggest victim since middle school: atsumu miya.”

soo, what do we think? :3. y/n is a massive bully but changes her ways for the better fr, atsumu, suna and osumu are stem nerds. series

gangsta paradise; oikawa tooru

• “you’re a sweetheart who moved into a ruthless and dangerous area and you just wanted to make friends, who knew that ‘friend’ would turn out to be a gang member? it’s not like you did.”

gangsta oikawa (lol), sweetheart y/n. series

back to me; suna rintaro

• “you and suna had just broke up, after three long years it was over, at least you thought it was. what, you thought suna was gonna let you go that easily?”

i mean i wouldn’t call him toxic but i guess that depends on what you think. this is truly just a funny little fic about him trying to get you back. series

write it in your blog; bakugou katsuki

• “you are the most successful journalist in the whole of japan! and you’re only 22, however your whole blog is based on your hatred in the hero society, especially bakugou katsuki. which only grows when you post about a highly confidential case which you have hot evidence about and he turns up at your house.”

heheh reader is rich in this but bakugou is even richer. series

on his birthday; todoroki shoto

• “in which you died on his birthday and he’s learning how to cope with it”

idk whether i should make it into a proper series or just a long ass fic

i hate this place; kiyoomi sakusa

• “your friend group is toxic as fuck yet you find solace in someone who arguable better than the rest.”

don’t know whether to make the friend group ocs or haikyuu boys. long ahh one shot

before it happens; osamu miya

• “osamu sadly took his own life, yet you have a chance to save him by going back in time and stopping him. through that, you fall back in love with him despite dating his best friend rintarou.”

meh idk i’m not exactly feeling it but maybe when i start writing it ill like it more. might be a long ahh series.

FACE2FACE; akaashi keiji smau

• “you and akaashi have been texting for a couple weeks now, yet have never seen each others faces. when the training camp roles in you have no choice to face him… but instead you don’t and pretend your a whole different girl.”

black reader, ideally has the boho, earthy aesthetic and believes in tarot readings/astrology! (sorry to anyone that doesn’t believe in them :(( ) series.

tell ur boyfriend; gojo satoru

• “satoru and y/n have a one night stand and he can’t get his mind off of her, satoru just had to have her. not like that would be a struggle- he gets whatever he wants- who cares about her boyfriend! who happens to be toji fushiguro… as well as his child’s biological father..”

no-curses au, collage au, spoilt gojo fr, he takes care of megumi who is around 7

ever after high x jjk

• it’s literally just that, royals and rebels with curses in the mix

rebel(lol)!reader x itadori

• series of their dynamic, how the got together and what their relationship means to them.

y/n is like that one kid that just never does the school work, is always in trouble and is always late

detective!gojo x lawyer reader

• murder mystery series with love in the mix heheh

i am not creative enough to make my own cases so i will be ripping off of mr monk (if you know, you know)

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ninapi · 1 year

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┏━•❃°•°❀°•°❃•━┓

For Kimetsu go here

For Jujutsu go here

For Tokyo Rev here

┗━•❃°•°❀°•°❃•━┛

❀。• New to this

Akaashi version (Good ending route): Akaashi Keiji falls in love with a single mother and realizes she's all he wants for his life.

Word count: 27,791

☆ch.1 ☆ch.2 ☆ ch.3 ☆ch.4 ☆ch.5 ☆ch.6

☆Bonus chapter (Valentines special)

Osamu version (Happy ending route): Osamu fights for his very own chance at happiness when he is reunited with his first love, the mother of his brother's son.

Word count: 20,044

☆ ch.1 ☆ch.2 ☆ch.3 ☆ch.4 ☆ch.5 ☆ch.6

Atsumu version (True ending route): Atsumu gets another chance to get back the love of his life, the mother of his son, and build the family he was supposed to have.

Word count: 23,240

☆ch.1 ☆ch.2 ☆ch.3 ☆ch.4 ☆ch.5 ☆ch.6

❀。• Save me

The beginning: ☆ch.0

Semi version (Good ending route): Semi never thought he would find love where his insecurities laid deep, he never thought someone so broken could be so full of love, he never thought he needed to feel loved as much, until he met you.

Word Count: 24,248

☆ch.1 ☆ch.2 ☆ch.3 ☆ch.4 ☆ch.5 ☆ch.6

☆Bonus Chapter: Good ending Oikawa version

Ushijima version (Happy ending route): Ushijima struggles to understand the concept of love and what is expected of him in said equation, but he finds himself in the predicament of wanting nothing more than to be with the woman he loves even if it gets in the way of his established lifestyle.

Word Count: 19,837

☆ch.1 ☆ch.2 ☆ch.3 ☆ch.4 ☆ch.5 ☆ch.6

Kageyama version (True ending route): Friendship is a fragile thing. Keeping you safe was his priority for the longest time, but overcoming hardships along someone you hold dear form irreplaceable, indestructible bonds, and a childhood friend can easily become the love of your life; or so that was for Kageyama Tobio.

Word Count: 19,958

☆ch.1 ☆ch.2 ☆ch.3 ☆ch.4 ☆ch.5 ☆ch.6

❀。• Forbidden Forest

Premise: Ancient Japan gets hit by a rare disease coming from the birds. Succumbing to it and fearing for the safety of your bird companion, as a last resort you reach a mythical forest full of ancient shapeshifting creatures. Will you be able to find a cure? Will you be safe in the middle of a forest full of unknown forces? Love is right around the corner and meeting different clans will help you find it.

☆ Ch.0

☆ Tengu Clan Path (Sugawara Koushi):

Staying by your bird friend's side was the most comforting path to follow. Will this one lead to a happy ending? Was this the right choice? Love can weigh you down sometimes, but it's wonderful, nonetheless.

Word count: 5782

☆ Owl Clan Path (Bokuto Koutarou):

The promise of a cure had never been this close, being the wisest of the forest clans, the answer might be around the corner, but what if you didn’t want to leave the forest any longer?

Word count: 4764

☆Bakeneko Clan Path (Kuroo Tetsurou):

The possibility to save humanity presented itself, but you would have to leave the forest to chase this opportunity, something that could end your life. What you didn’t know was that chasing it would also mean find a love like no other, one that was waiting for you on the other side.

Word count: 5582

❀。• Fox Village

Premise: The last option to overcome the illness that holds you was very much uncertain. A place only known to be a myth became your last chance to survive. Welcome to the fox village, a place full of mystical beings, a place to finally call home, a place where love knocks in more than one door at the same time and choosing which to open might as well change your life forever.

☆ Ch.0

❀。• Kita Version (Good Ending Route): The connection he had with his past made Kita want you more than any of the others. He wanted to be like his grandma and she had a human by her side, always. Looking for the village best interest he ends up finding the real meaning of true love.

Word Count: 6296

☆ Ch.1 ☆ Ch.2

❀。• Atsumu Version (Happy Ending, Ver.1): Atsumu had never been interested in others, to his family and the village he was a good for nothing, a heartless fox possessed by an evil spirit that feeds on his compassion. But to you, he was just like everybody else. Having someone to listen to you and be by your side sometimes can make a big difference in who you become and what you accomplish in life, and so it was for Miya Atsumu.

Word count: 6348

☆ Ch.1 ☆ Ch.2

❀。• Suna Version (Happy Ending, Ver.2): Being the first born of the most prominent house in the village, it was a pressing matter for Suna to deliver as future head of his clan. High expectations were set for him which sent him your way, only for him to realize you were all he really needed.

Word Count: 6111

☆ Ch.1 ☆Ch.2

❀。• Osamu Version (True Ending): Fighting his own blood for what he wanted had always been an everyday thing for Osamu, but this time was different, he wouldn't let anyone have you, not even his twin brother. Before you, mating was just a concept of survival for them, but love can change someone to unimaginable lengths.

Word Count: 6186

☆ Ch.1 ☆ Ch.2

❀。• Glitched:

Premise: Suna Rintarou unexpectedly meets the girl of his dreams through an online game and he does his best to find this mysterious girl in the real world and keep her for good.

Word count: 12,514

☆ch.1 ☆ch.2 ☆ch.3 ☆ch.4

❀。• A perfect circle

Premise: When you like the guy who likes the guy that likes you, things get a little out of hand, when a triangle becomes a circle not just one gets hurt. [Yamaguchi/Tsukki]

Word count: in progress…

☆ Ch.1 ☆ Ch.2 ☆ Ch.3 ☆Ch.4

....::::**•°✾°•**::::....

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blucassiopeia · 1 year

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Liar

"A prelude spin-off for an upcoming fic"

warnings: afab!reader, angst, comfort, hot violent semi, singer!reader

A Semi Eita x reader one shot or maybe not one shot

a/n: nervous about my first one shot.. criticisms will be accepted. it'll make me improve my works.

Semi groaned at the start of his day, smashing his eagle-designed alarm clock at his night table. He thought it was stupid for his highschool volleyball teammates to have a matching alarm clock that's so annoyingly loud every morning. He glared at it as he made his way to his bath.

It's a start of an another stressful dayーmorphed to a normal one because of the repetitive occurences. Brief sched meetings, interviews, band practices, photoshoots, recordings and repeat. But not on weekends though. On weekends, he can say that he can breathe even though he's basked in his popularity and non-existent privacy.

There's no remorse with this kind of life whatsoever. It's his way to cope up, to keep him busy, to drive himself away from his thoughts of her. A woman that's not you.

You saw her for the first time when Semi's management had to contact you for a very special event you're going to perform with him. You thought it was a recording or a mini event on malls, anything was on mind but a wedding.

"A wedding?"

You remembered how he stared at you with tired eyes, drumming his pen on the table in front of his slouching figure. He hummed a minute after and closed his eyes, massaged his temples and brows.

"Look, I really need to perform a song. I need it to be perfect. And I need a counterpart, and a co-singer for the... event." He made the last word sound so bitter in his tongue.

Semi is known is the music industry for his talentsーthough he has a band second to being also a singer-songwriter, and he has you for a fan. It's a secret you swear to God no one shall know because you're kinda shy and awestruck right now. He's also known as a friendly and approachable one in front of the cams, but so cold and distant off-cam. Workaholic.

"But why me?"

"The management picked you. Ask them. So..? Will you or will you not?"

You scowled at his tone. He shall ask you nicely. But, offers like this wouldn't come by often and it'll be a boost in your career if you'll do it with Semi, so the next day,¹ you started practicing with him in his studio.

Semi's songs are often emotional, and if you knew better, he's addressing it to someone special. But you never imagined him and his eyes glazing over at this particular song you've been practicing now for two days.

"I'm sorry. Can we have a break?"

His voice close to hitching, he's gulping so hard and can't seem to focus his eyes. He exited his studio and went somewhere else inside this condo of his, and you were met with silence. You sighed and looked around.

Pictures were scattered in his corkboard, you were drawn onto it. Volleyball. His teammates. Training camps. College. Trips. A golden-haired girl. More of it. More of her.

Slices of Semi's life in front of you. What a pleasure to be here.

You continued the practices with him steeling his resolve to finish the songs without having to take breaks in between. The wedding is nearing and he had prepared everything for you. All you have left to do is to be with him, stay by his side throughout the length of the event and sing with him.

You have seen pro-volleyball players in the venue, and a lot more familiar faces from his friends. The newly-wedded couple was gorgeous and loving, until you realized that the girl in Semi's pictures were the same as the one in front of you.

"Semi-saaan! Is she your date?" Her eyes full of amazement and excitement dunned over Semi that's having a hand on your waist, you felt it froze and gripped.

"Hm. Isn't that obvious? I can't attend some event like this without a date." Liar.

"Oi! Semi! Invite me in your wedding too, okay?" The groom spoke in between his conversation with the other men in his side.

"Of course!" That smile he flashes are fake. Liar.

The first dance of the wedded couple is on and this is the time where you and Semi had to the work you've been practicing on. The rhythm starts and throughout those songs, all you see is a heartbroken Semi in front of his mic, gazing at the bride. It's showinv in his voice that you had to hold his hand to get his attention. He tried to give you eye contact but it's unsuccessful. His gazes always flying back to where his heart is.

"Tsukishima Ran, am I going to call you now with his surname? You're still ugly." Laughs were all over the venue when he said that, few hoots and cheers on their high school friends.

"I just wanna say one thing coz I don't wanna make this long. Man, I know you'll make her happy so I'm just gonna ask you not to leave her. Cherish her more each passing day. It'll be easy for you, it's in your vows. And please, let me hang out with your kids in the future, I'm gonna teach them how to be like me. Bestest wishes to the both of you and more poops in the future." Laughs erupted again as Semi passed the mic on the emcee.

The rest of the night were worse, you watching Semi that's watching the bride from afar. You had to say something. "Why didn't you?"

"It's not in the agreement to talk about my life, Y/n." You shivered at his cold tone and never dared to speak again till the end of the event.

And it was the last time you had sang with Semi, or even talked with him. Whenever you find yourselves in the same room, he avoids you with all his might.

You had listened to his every song you have 3 favorites now, you picked his interest in volleyball, even watched league matches live, and swinging by his condo, just to be shut out by him. You were worried for him. You knew he needs someone to talk to, someone to share his problems and dilemmas with. You. He needs you.

You're in love with the broken Semi Eita.

And he's oblivious to that fact. He walked out of his condo just to find another goodies placed in his doorway inside a basket. He huffs and brought it inside with the others and started his routine again. He has to keep moving to be preoccupied. He has to be so tired that when he comes home later that night, he'll just plop to his bed and straight to sleep, not having space for unnecessary thoughts.

It was already a year and the woman he love already gave birth to twins. She's still as beautiful as the day he met her, still as radiant and adorable. He wanted to visit her and her kids, but he has to be kind to himself and heal first before showing up.

Like that'll help, he thought.

Whenever he sees you in his space, whenever, he'll be reminded of that day he gave up taking chances on the love of his life. Whenever he sees you, he's smacked by the fact that he'll never move on from her. Whenever he sees you, he'll feel how broken he is. You bring him pain, and he's avoiding you because of that.

"Leave me alone. I don't need to see you every fucking time. I don't want to see you after this. Please. Get away from me." He said one time when he found you again in his door, bringing your usual goodies.

"Liar."

That word sent a sharp pain to Semi as he stared at you, jaw dropped.

"You have been lying to yourself since that wedding, Semi Eita. When will you stop?"

He can't comprehend your words, faltered by his shock and disbelief, and anger arising. He felt his blood boil and dragged you inside and closed the door. You saw how his condo changed from the last time you've been here. Your eyes stopped wondering at the punch he gave to the door behind you.

"Who do you think you are to say those words to me? What do you know about me? You know nothing. Stop pestering me and get the hell out of my life!"

"Liar." Why did you drag me in, then? You wanted to say that. But not now that his eyes were blazing, but you can't back down. There's still that something in him that magnetizes you, something..

"Stop calling me a liar! You don't know what I've been through so stop calling me that!"

"Stop lying, then!" You snapped back at him. Both of you were breathing heavy, his breath fanning in your face.

The tension was stagnant for a while, you're not daring to back down from his hateful glares. He was growling, you're sure if you're not a girl you would be across his genkan by now because of his anger.

That was just cut off by his phone ringing. He slammed the door once and went straight to his living room to talk to the caller. That was your chance to breathe. Fuck, he was so close.

"Ran?" He paused and shuts his eyes close, throat bobbing. "Yea, I almost forgot, it's Saturday. I'm sorry. Gonna be there in 15." His voice was hoarse when he spoke. "Hm, I'm okay. Yes.ーyes."

Then he dropped the call and went straight to youーno, to the door behind you to open it, ignoring your presence. You don't wanna be locked out alone in his condo so you immediately slithered your way out before he closes the door. He groaned and left you, yet you followed him.

You know you'll follow him anywhere.

He was so fucked out when you followed him even to Ran's house. The moment you stepped out of your own carーto which was not your plan because you planned on riding his car forcefullyーhe managed to get a hold of your elbow and gripped it tight sending you shots of pain you whimpered.

"I told you to stay away from me, Y/n! Why did you follow me all the way here!?"

"You'll be putting yourself in danger."

He blinked once and you felt his grip loosened for a second. There was a swift wave of falter on his raged expression.

"For the last time, PLEASE stay away from me! Stop following me around! I don't want you near me! PLEASE!"

"Not a chance, Semi. If you can't fix yourself, then I will do it myself. You're not getting rid of me coz I'm not gonna give up until you take that fucking mask off your face!"

That day you stormed inside a house uninvited, Semi knew it was impossible to push you away. That day when you talked with Ran that you'll be with him babysitting her kids, Semi regretted he dragged you to his world. That day you squealed upon gazing at the twins, he knew he was doomed. That day when he saw you carrying one of the twins he's supposed to be babysitting, for a brief second, he wanted to be true to himself. Not to Ran, but to you.

Reblogs and interactions are appreciated. Theories will be entertained. Cassie 2023.

#haikyuu!#haikyuu angst #semi eita #semi x reader #semi x y/n #semi eita x reader #semi eita x y/n #haikyuu x reader #FS prelude spin-off_Semi Eita #haikyuu fluff #first time trying a one shot..#DID IT TURN OUT WELL?#criticisms are open #haikyuu x y/n #haikyuu fics #haikyuu semi #haikyuu semi eita #haikyuu semi angst #haikyuu semi fic

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rintarousgirl · 8 months

Text

❀ - HAUNTING ME

01. Y/N’S GIRLIES

❀ - SYPNOSIS

y/n and hanamaki are best friends, or at least, you were in high school. growing up, you always had the biggest crush on your childhood best friend hanamaki takahiro, but after an unfortunate fallout between the two of you, you promised yourself you wouldn't let your feelings be toyed like that again. that is, until you run into him years in the future. now, you're both very successful models, stuck in the same PR photo shoot. after being featured on the cover of multiple fashion magazines, fans love the dyanmic between you two and your managers set up a pr relationship. how could you deal with hanamaki takahiro, your cruel ex from high school, now butting into your career? simple answer is, you couldn't.

masterlist | next ->

please comment, ask in my inbox, or dm to be added to the taglist :))

fun facts !

❀ - semi and yachi like to be very ambiguous about their relationship online, but they both know their feelings for each other are 100% platonic. it's just fun to confuse semi's fans.

❀ - ms aiko is y/n's manager, who y/n doesn't always get along with very well.

❀ - semi regularly brings y/n food, that's why he has a name card he can show at the gate for clearance when dropping things off for y/n.

❀ - SYPNOSIS

a/n: so, um, i know i said i'd wait till AFTER "i wanna be yours" is finished to publish this, but i was so excited to get it out and the next finishing chapters for "i wanna be yours" are going to take a while anyway, and i want to keep interest up for this so...hope u all enjoy! <3

taglist:

@snail-squasher / @marga-j / @buggy-cj / @zamorazz / @wyrcan

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tender-rosiey · 2 years

Note

Can i req semi, oikawa and daichi receiving a bouquet of flowers as an apology from their s/o after a fight

“LILY OF THE VALLEY”

— oikawa, daichi and semi getting you apology flowers

ᴀ/ɴ: I want a bouquet of flowers :(

OIKAWA TOORU:

“I just want you to see things from my perspective; is that too hard?!” you scream out for like millionth time today, and your throat already feels very hoarse.

oikawa wasn’t backing down either, “I am a professional player, y/n; if I slack for one moment then I would be switched out the next!”

you take a deep breath, maybe this was being blown way too out of proportion, “tooru, you are their starting setter.”

“THAT DOESN’T MEAN THAT I CAN’T GET SWITCHED!” he counters.

you slam the table, fed up, “IT ALSO DOESN’T MEAN THAT YOU CAN FORGET ABOUT EVERYTHING ELSE AROUND YOU!”

your chests are both heaving. the room is suffocating, and you can’t stand being in it for even another moment.

you stride to your coat and oikawa is alarmed, “y-y/n, wh-what are you…?” his eyes follow your every movement and he desperately reaches for your wrist but you pull away.

“I am going out.”

that’s the last thing you say before you slam the front door, and oikawa’s knees buckle to the ground as he lets out a sob, what if this was the end? what if you are not coming back?

he shakily stands up, looking around him. the apartment feels so empty, quiet and his heart aches.

the silence is killing him.

his eyes land on the table where the both of you would usually dine, the room would be full of laughter and teasing, to him that was the highlight of his day, being able to see you smile and laugh and now he has driven you away.

but still, maybe you will come back? with that possibility in mind, he decides to do better.

an hour has passed and you finally open the door; you went on a much needed walk to clear your mind. perhaps you can talk things out in a calmer manner now.

you don’t expect the sight you are met with: a fancy looking dinner, dimly lit room with candles, your favorite dessert, and your husband clutching a bouquet of flowers and looking very tense as he examines it.

however, he smiles, a genuine one when he sees your figure, “welcome home, I…” he looks at the ground before offering the bouquet in his hand, “I am so sorry for everything I said.”

you take the bouquet, gently stroking the petals and the light fidgeting of oikawa’s fingers doesn’t go unnoticed. you put the bouquet to the side and he panics, “do you not like it?”

you don’t reply, instead you separate his hands and hold them in your own, “tooru, when I speak about things like this, it’s because I care about you. sometimes, we do things assuming that they will help us develop,” you take a breath, “but they end up doing the opposite and you have seen me go down that road and its dead end, didn’t you?”

he nods weakly, and tears start falling from his eyes when your hand touches his cheek, stroking it as you continue talking, “self-destruction is horrible, tooru; it isn’t something I want you to go through because I love you.”

“I love you more,” he chokes out, “ and I am sorry,” he rests his hand on top of yours, “I really am, and I swear to you that I will do better.”

“they better not be just words,” you sigh and he looks at you.

“you know that I don’t break my promises.”

you smile helplessly, “yeah, I prepared some milkbread,” you have never seen someone’s eyes light up as quickly.

SEMI EITA:

“y/n, for the last time, I am just asking you to be a little responsible and think a bit before you act, is that too much?”

you cross your arms, “you make it sound like I am a reckless troublemaker, eita,” huffing, you turn around, “well not everyone can play the same tune as yourself.”

he stands up abruptly from his seat, “I can’t be the only one who makes compromises!”

“are you disregarding everything I have done for you?!” you shout, shocked and annoyed.

he scowls, “don’t go pinning this on me.”

“well don’t overlook my efforts!” you retort.

“I CAN’T OVERLOOK SOMETHING THAT DOESN’T EXIST!”

realization dawns on him as he sees the tears prickling in your eyes; he looks down, biting his lip before excusing himself, with that, he leaves out of the front door.

you cover your mouth, a feeble attempt to hold back your cries. you are tired, so tired and despite the storm of emotions going inside of you right now, you want to sleep.

even if it has been proven impossible without your husband by your side.

you close your eyes once you get to bed, the only thing on your mind is if your husband will come back to you or will this loneliness be your companion in his stead.

the moment your eyes flutter open again is when you hear the creaking of the door. you rise from the bed, softly calling his name, “…eita?”

your vision finally focuses and you see your husband holding a bouquet of flowers, a look of guilt painted on his features.

he walks to you, half-kneeling on the ground as he presents the bouquet with his face to the ground, “I am sorry…so sorry.”

you take the bouquet from his hand, setting it aside and instead lifting his chin, “no need to be so stiff,” you make him stand up and straighten his back, “I am your spouse.”

“plus!” you continue as his gaze is fixated on you once again, “I made my own short comings as well so I should also be saying sorry.”

his hand is raised by your own as you place a soft kiss on the back of it, “I am sorry, eita.”

the man in front of you turns a bright shade of red, seemingly unable to form a response so quickly he gives you his back, “yeah yeah.”

“did I make you mad?” you ask cautiously but he knows that you are going to tease him and you do, “semi semi! are you mad?”

he sighs with a smile as you keep repeating the nickname. after all the years you have spent together, it would be shameful of him not to know you and your antics.

SAWAMURA DAICHI:

the fight has been going on for a while and the both of you were visibly tired, so your husband sighs, “let’s just go to bed.”

“but—“

“it’s better if we talk it out tomorrow; we are clearly not reaching a solution at the moment,” he retreats to the bedroom but halts at the door, “are you coming or…?”

you huff, turning your face away from him and he quietly enters the room. he closes his eyes in relief when he feels the bed dip, at least you are still beside him.

the next morning you wake up, your husband is not beside you.

the bed was empty per usual.

you didn’t have the luxury to relish the morning with your strong officer of a husband. it was one of the things that sparked the fight of yesterday, hence why you think that your concerns will be dismissed as his schedule isn’t something he can exactly control.

you hope that he would at least try, try to spend time with you. you are thankful for how understanding he is and how he tries to reason but if the problem didn’t arise then he wouldn’t have had to put with anything of that sort.

you, dejectedly, open the door to your living room and see a card with a breakfast waiting to be heated on the table.

curiously, you take it in your hand and start reading.

sorry for yesterday, gorgeous. I made you breakfast today, hopefully what sugawara taught me will come in handy. I know you are probably still mad about yesterday, don’t worry; we will talk about it again today.

i love you so much, don’t forget it

sincerely, your husband, daichi

despite your heavy heart, a small smile appears, and you hope that when he comes back, a proper discussion with actually effective results will happen.

for some reason, today, he returns earlier than usual but doesn’t open the door, instead opting to ring the doorbell.

you take off your gloves and get out of the kitchen, heading to the door. you slowly open it and you are met with your husband whose cheeks are painted a soft red hue with a sheepish smile gracing his lips.

“hey,” he greets before taking off his hat and bowing to you, “officer daichi, reporting for duty.”

a bouquet is revealed from his back as he hands it to you, “I heard you had a flower delivery; I hope you like…it?”

you gaze at the bouquet in your hand in silence which makes your husband slowly start fidgeting with his fingers, “honey…?”

“thank you…” you mumble and he combs his hair back, laughing lightly.

“it’s nothing really; it’s the least I can do,” he pauses for a moment, “can I go in?”

“oh my god right!” you step aside and he laughs again as he enters and takes his shoes off.

a smile is still on his face as he moves towards you and his hands rest on your hips, “I am home.”

you hum, wrapping you arms around his neck, “we still need to talk that over though,” and he simply nods, happy to be in your arms once again.

taglist: @magenta-cat-drawingss @pompompurin1028 @scul-pted @dazaisdeathwish @requiem626k @nameless-shrimp @shinys-bsd-world-1 @sonder-paradise @ravenina14 @jessbeinme15s-notebook @todorokichills @ginneko @missrown @shrynkk @simplyxsinned @beautiful-is-boring @bakugossanity @izukus-gf @irethepotato @thekaylahub @luciferspen @aeanya @sweetcloudsimp @moon-catto

do not copy or plagiarize or i will rob you

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midoriima · 2 years

Text

how could you be so cruel?

www.hq_shiratorizawa/angst-major-character-death.com

characters: ushijima, tendou, semi, reon, yamagata, kawanishi, shirabu, goshiki

you're sick sick. you're always in and out, mostly out, of school hence why you're close to friendless. actually, your very few friends had likely forgotten about you due to your condition but you don't mind.

you see [him] in your ward but there's only you two. it goes as being and feeling awkward being in the vicinity of each other until you reach out, "so, what are you here for?"

"oh, physical therapy cos of volleyball and stuff..."

you're not in need of physical therapy but you accompany him and stay with him in the room to keep him company. and before you knew it, you two started becoming friends. you get closer by the minute you keep talking and you're practically hospitalized buddies now.

it isn't until you start falling for him but you remember that your time in this world is nearly up. that said, you shouldn't even be friends with him because if he got attached, you would hurt him. it got a little bit awkward after the realization hit you but it got better when you started to forget.

...until you start liking him even more and you're sure it turned into loving him. the feeling of being attached to another being in this world when you'd rid yourself of these, hurt. you stripped yourself from family and even friends now so that it would hurt less for them and especially for you about leaving them, but now you love someone.

it takes a few days and nights, but then again, you're just human. it's impossible to strip yourself of attachments to this world. even the nurses that care for you, you get attached. even if it's not because they care about you personally and it's their job, people get attached anyway.

it takes a few days to come to terms with the fact that you love him but you'll also be leaving him a little after the time he leaves the hospital and finish physical therapy.

i only have months to live, can't i be a little selfish just once more?

things go back to the way they were with him and the days in this hellhole seem even brighter than the previous. hell, you two even look forward to everyday in the hospital.

it feels like things between you two, whatever that may be, is progressing. even if it's just your friendship for him, you're glad you're getting close. at least there can be someone to make your last few months worthwhile in the hospital.

it's cliche, but up in the rooftop of the hospital is where you can see everything so clearly. it's not as suffocating as it is inside the rooms and it's not devoid of colour. the cold air, too, is actually real and not coming from an air conditioner, it's also much more comforting when the wind blows and messes up your hairs and hit like thin, icy walls against your skin.

you could also look at him beside you and it's actually very romantic. you may just be for comfort and a friend to him, but he was something else to you.

you wish you could turn back time and meet him a little more sooner. but, if he had gotten his injury a little more sooner as well, then that'd mean you'd be alone in the rooftops by now.

days, weeks, and then months pass. here comes the marching of time that lead to your inevitable death. your final month to live in this very precious world.

his condition gets better, yours worsens by the hour you do anything stamina consuming.

on the note of your awful bind, you haven't told him what you were here for. but you don't plan on telling him anyway, and there's no point. if only the love you give could buy you time, you'd sure as hell be on the way to living an eternity by now. but that's not how it works.

with the sudden increase in his performance, he only gets a few days left before he can go. he'll be discharged early... meaning you'll be left alone and lonely earlier than it was initially.

"say, you haven't told me what you're here for so i'll ask if that's alright, what are you here for?"

ah, that question.

"hm, not answering that! it's a bit... embarrassing." will lying like this make the heavens change your mind about you and throw you to the fiery depths of hell?

"okay, okay, i won't ask since it's apparently embarrassing." he chuckled and oh my heavens, it's the most beautiful thing you have ever heard. it's more than enough to be considered as music to your ears and- okay, maybe you're exaggerating a bit, but it's true! something about his chuckles and laughs were so... words can't even describe.

"then, how about i ask when you'll get discharged?"

"by the second week this month, maybe by nightfall."

the smile that doesn't reach your eyes sends a chill down his spine. something wasn't going to happen to you, right? ...right?

the day of his leave from the hospital comes. you stare from the hallway as he speaks ever so brightly at the receptionists about his time with you and that he'll come visit you the day before and the day of your leave as well to return the favor of you helping him out and keeping him company.

he has a small and beautiful pot of tiger lilies, with a chocolate stuck to the soil since he didn't know what kinds of candies you liked. he makes a mental note to ask you right when he enters your ward.

he writes his name under the list of visitors and starts looking for the ward you both stayed in. he feels quite guilty for having been released early and not together with you, and it also sucks cos you were probably alone again.

but then again, you're getting discharged this evening so he can stay until you actually get discharged, and also, he can help you out while he's at it.

he finally gets on the floor and hallway to the ward. it's just at the end of the hall, but why are there nurses cleaning up all the beds? there's basically almost nobody there.

his heartbeat picked up its pace, had he missed it? did you actually get discharged earlier than what you thought?

until he sees there's still one more curtain that was left unopened. he breathes out of relief and begins to run towards your bed despite the warnings of refraining from running in the slippery floors. and with a bright smile on his face, he turns to your bed, almost slipping in the process. he'd been very picky with the flowers and chose the ones he had as a symbol of yours and his friendship but...

the bed is empty, lacking a you or your belongings.

a nurse comes in, opening the curtain and starts changing the sheets.

did he really miss his chance at wishing you well from this point on?

"uh, nurse, where's y/n? did they get discharged already?"

"i don't– oh..."

"oh?" why was their reaction like that? something bad didn't happen, right?

"they passed last night."

he arrives back home.

his parents welcomed him home and inquired about the pot of flowers but he hadn't answered, just put them down on a clear table before walking to his room with disbelief and shock as an evident expression on his face.

you passed? last night?

there was a heavy tug on his heart, his chest was tight and his shoulders were heavy. he didn't feel the need for anything and his mind was still trying to process everything.

you passed... last night...

the last he'd seen you was a week before. he couldn't visit you everyday like he was planning to because of the amount of schoolwork thrown at his face that he had to make up due to his absence.

it started with a heavy heart and shoulders.

then, he feels all the sorrow and grief as he mourns your death. his knees drop down to the concrete floor, earning a thud but the pain he felt in his chest was much greater than a simple knee to the concrete.

tears streaming his face as fast as they could, like they were rushing to go somewhere. they just kept coming so he didn't bother to wipe them away as he wailed on his bedroom floor.

"y/n...!"

he screamed and cried, wanting nothing more than this to be a joke.

"you said..."

you probably did lie to him. you weren't going to just leave the hospital, no, you were going to leave this world as well. to leave him.

"please... this has to be a joke."

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kita-shinsuke-whore · 2 years

Text

A MISERABLE CHRISTMAS

TW: Fluff.

A month after New Year has passed.

A new year is finally here and you are now back single after breaking up with Ushijima last two months ago. It's hurt. It really does but you tried to focus on yourself. You take care of your skincare, you started to try on new dresses and styles, you tried to hang out with people from other schools and of course, you met new people after transferring to new class.

You managed to block all the toxicity from your life but somehow you feel miserable after what you have said that to Tendou.

Ushijima had two months of cheating with someone else's and the one that broke the truth to you was your own junior. You're in your second year of highschool now and you tried to turn into a new leaf.

As you're going down the stairs to the cafeteria, someone's accidentally bumped their shoulder into yours.

"Oh, sorry!!", he said. He didn't said much but he flashed his smile...a very warm and nice smile that makes you feel so comfortable. He turned around at you to see if you're okay and you took a glance at his nametag.

Semi Eita.

He has white hairs, pretty eyes and the most obvious one...his warm personality.

"It's fine", you said to him. You walked down the stairs again and you bought yourself a sandwich and a strawberry milk. As you're about to take out your phone from your pocket, you realise...nothing is inside your pocket. You got panicked and ran to your class as soon as possible.

When you're going upstairs to go to your class, you saw Tendou is talking to Ushijima. You walked away faster because you just hated to face them now. Finally reaching the class door, you saw Semi guy is standing infront of your class while calling your name.

"Is there Y/N L/N here??", he said. But no one is answering him. "I think she went out. To the toilet i guess?", one of your classmates said to him. He nodded his head and when he turned around, both of you made an eye contact. He didn't break them and so do you.

"I'm...Y/N", you told him. He walked up to you and smiled again. "You dropped your phone. I guess it slipped out from your pocket.", he grins as he handing out your item to you. You bowed and thanked him. You realise he might be your crush now...

When he is about to walk away, you grabbed his hand and called his name. "Wait, Semi!", you said.

"Ehh, yes??", he looked at you confusedly. "Can...Wait, may I know which class you're from? And are you free this evening?", you asked him.

"Oh, that's all you wanted to know? Well, I'm from Second Year and the Fourth Class and yes, I am free this evening", he replied to you.

"Can we go to the nearest cafe around here? I wanted to show my gratitude to you", you said. He smiled again and patted your head. "I would loved to!", he said. He seriously make you feel so fluffy.

That evening, both of you went out to the nearest Starbucks and you paid for his drink. "Thank you for paying my drink.", he said. "No worries, I'm happy. But...how do you know it's my phone that you're holding to?", you asked him.

"Your keychain has your name craved on it... It's basically Y/N L/N", Semi said again. "Wait, which club are you from? Calligraphy isnt it?", he suddenly get interested in you. "Yea...I am. How about you?", you asked him. "I'm basically in a volleyball team. You know right our school has like the best volleyball team?", Semi said. He laughed proudly after saying that. Well, it's a fact.

"Oh wow. A volleyball player... That's great!", you said. It's not so great. Oh, why do you have to get stucked with every volleyball player like, what is your fate with them?

Weeks passed by and you're getting closer with Semi. Ushijima does realized what happened between both of you. Rumours about his new girlfriend cheated on him spreaded all over the school too. Some said she dated him for popularity. Some said just for satisfaction.

Once Ushijima broke up with his new girlfriend, he tried to contact you back but you have moved on and not going back to him.

You knew how much your feelings are growing back because of this Semi Eita guy. He is so mesmerising and makes you fell from him just by looking at his smile.

You two get to know eachother until April. That's when the spring season started and so do you two. Ushijima regretted the fact he cheated on you. You moved on, you're doing well, you trusted yourself and you give someone else's a chance to get into your heart.

Timeskip.

Ushijima watched how you walked on the aisle in your wedding dress that makes you looked way too alluring and gorgeous. Your father put your hand into Semi's and he walked away. Semi holds your hand tight. Then, the wedding ceremony started with the vow session.

Once the vow session ended, the priest asked Semi as the groom to kiss you. Semi wrapped his arm around your waist and pulled you closer to him. He then slowly kissed you passionately infront of the guests and everyone clapped their hands. Ushijima closed his eyes to shut down the feelings of jealousy from watching your lovely day. Semi is a great guy. He is loyal and stay with you since 17 till the age of 25. 8 years of waiting worth it.

The wedding that happened on Christmas day.

You married your own soulmate.

#semi eita #haikyuu angst #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu pov #ushijima angst #tendou angst #haikyuu oneshot #Spotify

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hiraethwa · 2 months

Text

one summer day

06 saturn ii. where ushijima’s words take you by surprise.

<< 05 saturn i. | >> 07 sun and moon. | << the collection >>

pairing: ushijima wakatoshi x reader a/n: i am back from my trip now, i will be posting more regularly again, thank you for staying! i loved reading the tags on your reblogs of one summer day, they make my heart go WAHHH! my inbox is always open if you want to chat <3 - ave word count: 1.5k warnings: angst, childhood trauma, parental neglect/verbal abuse, past death of a family member

april, second year

“you don’t have to be the person in your house with me.”

since he stayed with you that night, there has been a medley of conflicting feelings swirling in you. you had felt embarrassed in the morning, but also relieved for his presence. and this burning shame in your chest whenever you see him and his eyes seem to ask, are you alright?

you could tell he wants to ask so many questions, but he is holding himself back, waiting for you to tell him yourself. worst of all, you wanted to tell him, consequences be damned. but you were afraid he would see you differently. you don’t think you could bear the person who’s seen you at your worst decide you were not worth his time. but if you wait any longer, perhaps he would decide that anyway.

“what i mean is, you can be yourself around me, always.” you know that. deep down, you feel it.

“ushijima–” you start, staring down at your shoes, thinking about how to explain that day to him without trauma dumping on him.

he corrects you, “wakatoshi”

your cheeks color, testing the way his name rolls off your tongue, “wakatoshi… i owe you an explanation…”

you decide it is easier to start from the day everything changed. so you tell him what you haven’t been able to tell any of your friends since that day eight years ago. about your sister, akiko’s death anniversary. that she passed away in an accident, and that it was your fault for leaving her outside the house when your mother tasked you to look after her. that even though eight year old you went in to get some water for the both of you playing outside, it was still your fault. that she had ran out after a stray cat and did not see the car coming. that it was your fault.

“am i a terrible person?”

and then you hold your breath, knowing there is a possibility that he would have that accusing look in his warm brown eyes. beautiful with tiny flecks of greens and golds. you think those are your favorite features of him. and fuck, it would hurt like hell if that is the way he looks at you from now on. but you had taken a leap of faith, all you can do is hope for the best. hope that the feeling in your gut is not wrong.

“and your parents, why weren’t they around?” for their daughter’s death anniversary goes unspoken. of all the questions he could have asked, he sure did pick the most difficult one, you thought.

“let’s just say we all cope in our own ways. akiko’s death… it changed our family for the worse. my father threw himself into work to forget about it… my mother… her grief made her meaner, colder, it changed her.”

he gives you a concerned look, causing you to hurriedly explain that your mother is not abusive. “she’s just different than the mother i had when akiko was still here. she cared less about us, her words became sharp, like knives designed to hurt, especially when it comes to me, but she never laid a hand on us. i think her grief morphed into anger, and she never stopped blaming me for that day.”

“it isn’t your fault, you know that, right?” he grabs your wrist, turning you around to look at him.

your next words comes out in a whisper. “i know, but if i hadn’t left her, akiko would still be here. if i had done what i was supposed to, my parents wouldn’t have lost their daughter, and we could have been happy,” your voice cracks.

“you were a child. it wasn’t your fault. do you understand?” his strong grip on your shoulders forces you to look into his eyes. there was no judgement in them. no accusing look, no blame, only resolution. and they made you feel safe. “you cannot be blamed for your parent’s decisions, and it was their responsibility to look after their children’s well-being, not an eight year old child. your only duty was to grow up.”

an unidentifiable feeling overwhelms you, welling up tears in your eyes. what is it about me and crying in front of ushijima? you had been fine, just fine before he came along and messed up your coping system. every year before this on that day, you wouldn’t even cry, believing that all your tears had been spent when you were eight. that all you could do is feel empty and sad and self-destructive on that day while lying in your bed, staring at the ceiling until the sun comes up.

oh gods, you were eight, and you had believed that it was your fault your family lost a sister, a daughter, and your mother let you believe it. she never let you forget it. all the hurtful words hurled at you. all the pain you swallowed and carefully locked away in a box.

your home stopped being a home that day.

home should feel safe. home should be a place you long to be after a long day, not somewhere you dreaded. home should feel like a warm blanket on cold winter days, not a house that is a place to eat and sleep. home should feel safe. but it doesn’t.

you had known it for a long time. but you had been running away, refusing to face the fact. that maybe if you pretended hard enough, it would all go away. all this heartbreak that you had hidden away would vanish.

“i don’t think my mother fully forgave me for it. i don’t think she forgave herself either.” but you were only a child. and all you wanted was her love, and approval, and support, and presence in your life.

you look up at the stars shining in the dark sky, wondering if your sister is one of the millions smiling down at you from a far away distance. “she would have been in junior high if she was still here.” you smile sadly at the stars, thinking of the life that she could have had ahead of her. all taken away in one unfortunate moment.

“your sister would want you to be happy, to live for yourself. i think she would find solace in that.”

you turn sharply to look at ushijima. “i–i have been doing my best to survive.”

his voice turns gentle, “but not truly living.”

“have you spoken to anyone about this?” he inquires, though you think he knows the answer.

you clench your fists, looking away, a rising feeling in your chest that you identify as discomfort. oh, he is safe, but he is not afraid to tell you the truth, no matter how much it hurts. “you’re the first.”

no one would understand anyway. not your parents, if they even cared enough to listen to you. not your brother, who had pushed you to open up, he lost his sister that night too.

“then you no longer carry the burden by your lonesome. live, y/n, for you and your sister.”

live. he says it like it is so easy. as if living in that house doesn’t make you gasp for breath. if only your house did not also feel like your prison. if only being alive when your sister no longer breathes does not feel like a sin. as if everyday does not feel like being trapped in the past.

and then with excruciating realization, you admit it. “i don’t know how.”

the recognition leaves your head spinning, and you seek the comfort that you had felt in his arms. looping your arms around his torso, you bury your head into his chest. how do i do this how do i do this how do–

“you take it day by day. one foot in front of you at a time. and you keep looking forward.” he tilts your chin up, searching your eyes. “i will be right next to you.” he promises.

“don’t say things you don’t mean.” please don’t make promises you can’t keep.

“y/n, i only say things i mean.” you hope he sees the gratitude in your eyes. you really hope he means it. because you think you can make it, with him by your side. when you’re with ushijima, you can truly breathe. with him by your side, you can see a glimpse of your future tonight. maybe not tomorrow, not a month from now, but one day, you could be happy.

akiko, did you send him to me? thank you. i love you. i miss you. i miss you so much. but i think i need to learn to let you go now.

reblogs and comments are appreciated!

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diabolicalacid · 2 years

Text

— LOVELOVELOVE (prologue)

pairing : semi eita x reader

genre : fluff

summary : eita and love through the years. a tale that begins with the girl next door and culminates with someone he befriends at his middle school over a mechanical pencil.

or, in which eita falls in love over and over again, with the girl next door, with music, with his grandfather’s old guitar, with volleyball, and it ends with him falling for you.

wc : 10.7k (i apologise, i just went with the flow tbh)

music : lovelovelove by baek ye rin

an : this is the prologue to my upcoming semi fic. i have no idea when it will be out. probably not before mid to late september since i have a few tests coming up.

REBLOGS APPRECIATED <3

it’s summer in the country. semi eita is twelve. he’s dawdling on the verge of puberty like a moth whirring under the shade of lamplight. a rather prominent adam’s apple sits at the bottom of his neck, allowing otosan to tease him from time to time, joking he could see it from a mile away if he were to try. and at twelve, on the edge of pubescence, love is a concept as foreign as it can be to oneself. at the same time, love is as familiar as it gets.

eita never invests much of his time thinking about what love could possibly mean. school keeps him busy most of the time, and he never really gets the opportunity to ponder over the particular thought. then again, at his age, it isn’t necessary for him to give it a thought either. he thinks there can’t possibly be anything more to love than what he already knows about it. there is hardly a chance love will turn out to be something grander than what he has already decided it is, at the age of twelve.

love is, he believes, in the brownies his okaasan bakes when she notices the slightest shift in his otherwise calm rhythm, the sweaters his obaasan sews right before the onset of winter to keep their family warm, the continental take out his otosan brings home every weekend as a nice change of pace from time to time. takechi, his only friend around the neighborhood, and also his next door neighbor, knocks on his front door at half past five everyday, inviting him out to play in the evening.

there is nothing more to love than such acts of services, nothing less either. eita decides this at twelve, right before the onset of puberty. he still has a lot to learn about the working of this world, but he thinks he already knows all the details about how it operates. for him, love reflects in doing the smallest things for someone, and while it might not seem like good enough effort, it actually is. as long as there is a wide smile on their faces, happiness in their hearts, a hint of contentment in their gratitude, there is nothing more he needs to do in order to love them enough.

the people around him love eita with everything they have, and he loves them in quantities equal to what he receives, if not more. he loves them in his own ways. in his own time. there is no other definition of love to him. love is in balance like this, like what he has experienced all his life, and he’s fond of the concept of love because it’s so simple, so caring, so endearing towards him.

heat wave surges in the month of may, and eita, with a pair of red flushed cheeks, clammy palms and a forehead drenched in sweat, chases after a turquoise butterfly wafting around his backyard under the supervision of obaasan, who sits on the egawa, sifting through the spinach leaves to separate the dried ones out.

the butterfly flutters, resonating with the pace of the wind current, floating towards the front yard, and he sprints after it, following its unruly trail. obaasan gets off the egawa to keep pace with eita before he runs off somewhere in the neighborhood without company. the butterfly fleets off, diminishing in the vast blue skies on its way to look for a new source of nectar, and eita’s attention is garnered by the sight of several cardboard boxes scattered over the concrete footpath, and a married couple (he can only speculate the nature of their relationship with no absolute confirmation) scrimmaging through the luggage outside the house across the street.

(“hey eita, did you know the house across the street is haunted?” takechi raises a brow, inquiring as he prompts eita to pretend to be interested in what he has to say, pushing his wooden spoon into the scoop of ice cream to take a heavy bite out of it. his words leave eita bemused, confused even, but mostly only a chuckle precipitates at the back of his throat when he thinks about how stupid takechi’s question directed to him truly is.

there was a rumour about tanizaki from house number six hundred six peeing his pants in front of the neighbourhood kids, another one about minatozaki dating a highschooler instead of someone who’s around her age while she’s just thirteen, but word about the house across the street being haunted spinning around the neighborhood is foreign to him. then again, as someone who finds out any and every neighborhood gossip he’s ever heard of from takechi himself, eita shouldn’t expect to know this rumour to begin with.

“no, what are you talking about?” eita questions the claim, deciding to amuse takechi even if it’s just for a moment or two, so he asks for a reconfirmation, eyeing takechi with curiosity, but more so with a puzzled look hanging on his face, while still licking the final splotches of ice cream rendered on his spoon.

“well, they say there are ghosts in that house.” takechi says, shrugging, biting into his spoonful of chocolate ice cream, making eita flinch in disgust at the sight of his teeth digging into the cold dessert, feeling the sensitivity rev in his own nerves as well. takechi digs into the scoop to obtain another spoonful, saying, mostly second guessing his words, “i don’t know if it’s true, but i never go close to that house. i’ve only heard rumors, but i’m still scared.”

“neither should you go anywhere near it, eita.” he warns, peaking eita’s dubiety regarding his words, making him drop his spoonful of ice cream to the ground. the summer heat melts the dessert, sweet liquid dispersing on the hot, summer concrete, snatching the smile off eita’s face, also the motivation to have more of it, although sweat drips down his forehead, wetting the concrete when the drops encounter the surface.

eita doesn’t believe in what his friend has to say. sure, takechi won’t lie to him on purpose. obaasan says friends aren’t supposed to lie, plus, at twelve, there is only so much he knows about being wary of peoples’ lies. takechi isn’t just people though, he’s a good friend, best friend even. but obaasan also told him once that ghosts don’t exist, and thinking thoughts alike is only barren. those beliefs are empty, words with no mass, and as eita grows up, he should know better than to trust concepts akin to those.

“well, i don’t think so.” eita shrugs, dismissing takechi’s claim as he tosses his wooden spoon into the dustbin close by, letting takechi have the last few bites of the ice cream they snuck out to purchase on this summer afternoon. he rejects the idea, earning a frown from his friend, “my obaasan says ghosts don’t exist.”

“well then you should tell your obaasan she’s wrong.” takechi enjoins, a hint of aggressiveness in his voice as he presses eita to believe his words, reasoning with him, “no family stays there for more than a few months. don’t you think it’s strange?”

his words strike a cord within eita because all said and done, they’re true. the house across the street certainly is queer, and coming to think of it, taking into account live observations, no one actually manages to stay there for more than a few months. four months is the most a family can take. a month is the least the neighborhood has witnessed.

takechi takes the last bite of the chocolate ice cream, letting the coolness disperse within to overpower the freakish heat of the sun. he jogs to throw the paper cup into the bin, and to pay the vendor for their treat.

eita thinks about takechi’s words for twenty seconds at the most before scoffing at himself for even giving those empty phrases a thought.

“well, i still don’t believe you.” he stands his opposition, choosing to believe his obaasan, highlighting a pout on takechi’s face. eita begins walking home, leaving takechi behind to follow him if he desires to do so.

he looks back to see takechi idle, unwilling to tag along with a face displeasured by his actions, and speaks up in an attempt to convince him otherwise, “maybe the house is just not good. maybe it has a lot of bugs or something, man.”

“let’s go home now.” eita invites him, gesturing takechi to join him by curling his fingers inwards.

takechi shrugs, humming in agreement with eita, letting his own claims slide past after giving it a thought. although eita believes his obaasan more than he believes in what takechi told him today, doubt still lingers around, and it’s push over his thoughts is quite strong, dodging the initial disbelief. before eita walks in through the gate of his front yard, he spends a few seconds staring at the house across the street and the eerie air that wraps around it.)

“another day, another family.” obaasan sighs, attention caught by the sight her grandson is staring at, as she reaches the front yard, short, tired steps trying to keep up with a youngster’s brisk pace. she pats his back lightly, gesturing him to move to the backyard.

this is the eighth family in the last three years, and the constant motion of families in and out of that house wouldn’t bother her as much if it wasn’t for the fact that she’s the oldest in the neighborhood. meaning, the responsibility of welcoming someone new into the neighborhood falls on her shoulders. at her age, with her bad knees, elbows that ache even at the slightest of motion, and a hunched back, there’s only so much she can take, so she wishes someone would move in permanently once and for all, sparing her the effort to welcome new families all the time.

but it seems the house across the street is truly haunted, with no family finding it within themselves to stay back, and in a neighborhood like theirs where everyone knows each other, rumors are quick to proliferate, which is why she needs to make sure eita doesn’t fall prey to the neighborhood gossip.

obaasan starts taking steps to return to the egawa to continue sifting through the spinach leaves, expecting eita to follow her trail back inside.

before he follows her inside, eita takes a final peek at the new family moving in the house across the street. he spots a girl around his age rushing out of their car, quickly taking a spot next to her mother, a gaming console hanging by her left hand, and the fingers of her right gently tugging onto her mother’s silk skirt as she surveys the new neighborhood she’s been brought into.

she feels a pair of eyes examining her and cranes her neck in the opposite direction, only to spot eita standing across the street with his eyes stuck on her. but she doesn’t find it weird, considering from his point of view, she’s someone new around the neighborhood he has lived in for so long, and he’s seeing her around for the first time. a small smile breaks her lips apart, counting on the boy to return it, but its approach leaves eita flustered, and cheeks that were already red at the expense of the summer heat, turn a shade darker. he runs off inside, and the smile on her lips instantly dims.

“we have new neighbors again.” okaasan announces, walking into the living room with two cups of tea. one for herself and one for otosan.

although he’s already well aware, and the news is nothing new to him following his encounter earlier this afternoon, eita still looks up from his gaming console, not expectantly, rather wearily, tired of the same sequence of events repeating themselves again and again.

otosan and obaasan turn their heads as well, following the announcement that was made, but no one has anything to say in response to it, perhaps because everyone knows she’ll be announcing the same thing to them a few months down the line. no one is surprised at her words, no one is thrilled at the thought of having a new family around for the second time this year already, and it’s only may.

obaasan sighs, looking up from the shirt she’s sewing for eita while otosan looks up from the office documents he’s busy updating. he says, sounding nothing but uninterested, “that sounds nice.” he goes back to working his job, while okaasan takes a seat next to him, nudging him to involve himself in the conversation, pondering, “i wonder if they have a kid.”

“how am i supposed to know that?” otosan mumbles, attention clipped onto the papers in front of him, sounding miffed at her query, even though the question wasn’t meant for him to answer. it was just a thought she chose to express out loud, not expecting an answer to begin with. a rhetorical question. something like a conversation starter of sorts.

she rolls her eyes at his wound up tone, resuming, “someone around eita’s age to keep him company.” she says, sighing, expectant eyes looking at eita who sits next to obaasan, tapping his fingers vigorously against the buttons, attempting to win yet another round of the video game he recently purchased.

“they most likely do.” otosan sighs before he finally joins in the conversation, focus drifting off the documents for a brief while as he tries to find words to comfort his wife’s concern. she finally offers him the cup of tea she had been gatekeeping for so long. he adds to his words in a vague attempt to reassure her, “just because the last two families didn’t have kids his age, doesn’t mean this one wont either.”

‘they do.’ eita wants to intervene the conversation. he knows the new neighbours do have a kid, and he did come across the daughter of the family earlier this afternoon, but he decides not to, resuming his game, knowing all too well that okaasan will force him to make friends with her even when he doesn’t want to. history will repeat itself. he knows this well because that is exactly how he became friends with takechi, and just because that worked out for him, doesn’t mean eita wants this to make it work this time around. he’s fine having just one friend.

“i hope so.” okaasan sighs, yearning for the possibility to be true, sipping from her own cup of tea as she continues looking at eita, but this time around, her eyes are drenched in worry.

he’s a quiet kid. she’s well aware of the fact. he has a difficult time making new friends. she knows this too. as his okaasan, she knows him quite well. at least that’s what she thinks, but really, eita himself doesn’t want to make any more friends. while she thinks he hesitates to talk to new people, the truth is, he doesn’t attempt at all. but takechi tags along despite eita’s reserved nature that holds him back from mingling with the crowd. takechi’s presence let’s her rest with ease. all she really wants is for eita to have a great childhood while he still can, except her aspirations for the same differ from those belonging to her son himself.

“why does it matter?” otosan asks her, curiosity rising because he doesn’t understand the origin of her desperation, sipping some tea before placing his cup on the coaster. he resumes updating the documents in hand, a part of him acquainted to her reasons beforehand. he finetunes his glasses over his nose before he screens through the set of papers, looking for the relevant ones.

“i just think he’ll get lonely if he doesn’t make friends.” she expresses her concern to her husband, still eyeing eita with the same worried look prying her face. eita notices her intense, but loving gaze on himself that’s just as worried at the same time, and in response to it, he leaves the room, hands clutching the gaming console. she sighs, watching him jog off, then turns back to her husband.

her expectations don’t sit right with otosan. though he already knew where the conversation was headed, but just this once, he hoped they wouldn’t end up going down the same road again. otosan wants to roll his eyes at her, but he knows that will only incite a fight, so he keeps it to himself, avoiding a response from his end.

the truth is, he doesn’t understand her one bit, and this isn’t the first time this conversation is being brought up. it’s an everyday thing at this point. eita is twelve, living a good life on his own terms. he’s a kid who knows to balance his academic life with other endeavors he takes a part in. plus it’s not like he doesn’t have friends at all. from what otosan has heard from takechi, him and eita do hang out with some other kids at their middle school. so his wife’s constant worry over the matter makes no sense to him. most of the time, he thinks, she overdoes it.

“you worry too much.” he tells her, taking a hold of her hand to rub her knuckles, reassuring her, “eita is twelve, and he has enough friends already. you don’t have to worry so much about him.” she nods, partly giving up her concern, agreeing with what her husband has to say, but a part of her still lingers in worry regarding the matter.

she spots eita sneaking a glance into the livingroom, eavesdropping on their conversation. he leans against the door jab, softly smiling at her, nodding to his otosan’s words, and she can’t help but return his gesture. she smiles back at him, lips finding it difficult to curve upwards with all the core rn that keeps dragging them down. but her smile, although only small, is still warm. eita runs off to his bedroom after he receives it.

it takes her eight days, but okaasan eventually discovers that the family across theirs has a daughter who is around eita’s age. missus shimada shows up at the neighborhood meeting to take part in a discussion about neighborhood development plans, and okaasan, who is too impatient to hold it in, questions her about her family. shimada tells her she has a daughter, and that puts a saccharine smile on okaasan’s lips, the very thought of her son possibly having another friend warming her heart.

“eita, you should try making friends with kanao, huh? the daughter of shimada’s across the street.” okaasan suggests, wiping wet dishes using a paper towel.

eita looks up from his console, putting a bleak expression on his face, but really, he senses uneasiness bubbling within himself. he knew she would find out eventually. it was only a matter of time before okaasan would meet their new neighbours and find out about the existence of their daughter. only a matter of few days before she would sock him into making a new friend.

the thing is, eita simply isn’t interested. he doesn’t want to get involved with the girl who lives in the house across the street. it isn’t because he doesn’t need another friend. while that’s definitely a part of the reason why, the truth is that he’s scared. takechi’s words certainly left an impact on his mind, and he hasn’t been able to shake the fear off his sleeves.

he hums, expression still bland, finger pressing the pause button on the console, saying, “i might try to.”

his response doesn’t exactly please okaasan. the saccharine smile that the news curved on her lips, and she expected it to return with eita’s compliance, fails to come back to her. his quaint response only stacks up her worry about his social life, and as much as her husband has reassured her that her son has more than enough friends, she’s well aware they’re only for namesake and nothing more. other than takechi, there isn’t anyone her son can rely on.

but she decides not to pry further, knowing eita will only be peeved at her, slipping him an obvious hint, “their daughter goes to the park down the street every evening.”

“you should head there with takechi.” she says, expectant eyes looking at eita who only looks up from his console when he finds her gaze stuck on him.

one has to be very nosey to know details like those is what eita thinks, and the fact that his okaasan knows it, certainly puts him to shame. he sighs, truly embarrassed thinking about just how many questions she had to ask to get that piece of information out of the girl’s mother, responding, “okay.”

her lips part into a small, but content smile, a part of it gleans from his slightly more enthusiastic response, another at the possibility that he might at least try. as long as eita tries, she’ll consider it a success.

making friends with the girl across the street however, doesn’t turn out to be as easy as eita thought it would be. he could just give up, considering he never wanted to do it in the first place. but knowing just how pushy and nosey his okaasan is, he wants to give it just one chance, aiming it wouldn’t work and the girl would end up disliking him.

but over the next few days, every time he steps closer to her in the neighborhood park, aiming to start a conversation, his lips and his limbs, in unison, come up with a new excuse to draw back from the attempt. it’s as if they have a mind of their own. they hold him back from fulfilling the one attempt his okaasan wishes he would make. she only worries about him, urging him more every night over dinner. he smiles and nods, assuring her he will give it another shot, but history keeps on repeating itself for sixteen days.

eita decides to talk to takechi. he knows if there is one person who can make this task easy, it’s takechi, who is as social as one can possibly be. he tells him he wants to be friends with the girl who lives across the street from them, but he’s terrified. she lives in the haunted house after all. if she’s a ghost, eita fears she might hurt him and takechi.

at first, takechi laughs at him, shedding light on how eita was the one to disapprove of his claims and now he’s peeing his pants over the same. seeing him in discomfort over something he was strongly in opposition of only amuses takechi. boredom clicks in after four days of teasing eita over it every change he gets. nonetheless, he becomes friends with girl to help eita initiate a conversation with her. eita learns her name is kanao. he ends up liking the sound of it.

takechi tries dragging eita to the playground. but the resistance on his end is too strong and he finds all his attempts unsuccessful. each one worse than before. eita prefers to stay in his bed. the most he does is walk to the park only to find his friend playing around the place with kanao when he views them from the sidelines, never stepping in.

eita walks to the park, looks at kanao under the four pm sun. the marmalade skies reflect on her soft skin as she sprints around the playground, takechi running after her as the seeker. sometimes he comes across her on her way to the grocery store, hand in hand with her mother. smiles are exchanged but that’s all there is to it. sometimes she sways on the swing in her front yard, her dog keeping her company. specks of innocence linger around and about kanao, almost convincing him she isn’t a supernatural being after observing her for over twenty six days.

but takechi’s words that slipped off his lips, sticky with chocolate ice cream grate at eita’s skin, peeling the courage off of it every time he takes a step closer to kanao. he ends up taking two steps backwards, a strong desire to resist any sort of contact.

“what’s wrong with you?” kanao confronts him, arms crossed, face stricken with genuine perplexion as she towers over eita who sits on the bench next to the sandbox, digging through the grainy texture to kill some time. this happens on the thirtieth day after she finally gets tired of being stared at, and annoyance regarding eita’s skepticism gets to her.

“what do you mean?” he deflects the question, despite knowing exactly what she’s asking about. eita isn’t exactly good at being discrete. this much he knows because he has seen kanao arrest his eyes fixed on her more than once over the last month or so. he gets off and jogs to the side to lift a feeble branch, and starts drawing patterns in sand.

his nonchalance renders kanao even more ruffled at him, and she swats the branch off his hands, raising her voice, “eita, why have you been hiding from me? we can talk. we are friends, you know.”

“we are?” eita meets her gaze, a look of confusion glancing at her through his eyes, because he definitely did not expect her to refer to him as a friend after how he has been acting around her as of late.

“yes, we are.” she sighs, lightly battering his head with her hand, explaining, “i know you think i’m a ghost or something like that, but i’m not.”

“i’m just a girl and i want to be friends.” she shrugs, dilly dallying with her hands behind her back, looking at him expectantly, allowing guilt to disperse within eita.

but more so, embarrassment, because someone told her about the real reason he’s been avoiding her and more than reasonable, it sounds empty and embarrassing. of course it had to be takechi. eita makes a mental note to confront him the next time they cross paths.

“okay, we can be friends.” eita sighs, extending his hand to shake it with hers, calling truce, granting her the benefit of doubt that she isn’t a ghost, but is just a girl around his age who happened to move into the strangest house in his neighborhood.

somewhere in a small neighborhood in miyagi, where everyone knows each other and rumors spread faster than butter on a slice of bread, a friendship blossoms. this time, for real. eita tells okaasan two days later. the saccharine smile she lost over the last conversation with him returns.

“so, was it takechi who told you?” eita questions as the two of them sit under a mango tree in the park, burrowing teeth into the cookies she baked that turned out a little harder than she had expected.

“about what, eita?” at first, she doesn’t understand what he’s referring to, and she starts to look back on every single thing takechi has told her so far. but she’s a smart girl, so it doesn’t take her long to figure out what he’s questioning her about.

“mhm, he did.” she hums, nodding his way, and eita, who was almost sure of takechi’s notoriety, seethes, gritting his teeth when he spots takechi walking their way.

he drops the half eaten cookie into the plate before him, jumping to his feet, and sprints towards who receives the memo that eita is pissed and changes his trajectory to scurry the other way around. kanao’s lips break into the widest grin they’ve known since she moved to the neighborhood, when she looks at her newfound friends fooling around, realizing she’s no longer alone in this new place.

“so,” eita begins, stretching the word, “where are you taking me today?” he asks, much curious and unaware of kanao’s plans for the day.

her giddy self stands in her front yard, balancing herself on her toes as she peeks at the house across the street, waiting for takechi to join the two of them. she listens to eita’s question, but refuses to respond elaborately, only telling him so much, “there’s something i need you guys to see.”

“something i’ve waited to show you for long enough now.” she adds, also adding bulk to his curiosity.

at her words, eita is nettled, because he expected a better response, or at least something more than whatever he received, something he can utilize to connect the dots. “elaborate on it please.” he requests, taking a few steps ahead to tap on her shoulder, pressing her for more details.

kanao loses balance, encountering the ground with a thud, but it doesn’t bother her as much as eita’s curiosity currently doing summersaults does, even when she politely asked him to wait for her to guide him to the surprise rather than asking for it upfront.

“i’m sorry.” eita apologises to kanao who looks at him chafed, just not at the fact that he made her drop herself to the ground. the sight of his friend reduced to concrete because of his lack of patience churns some guilt within, and he protracts his hand for her to take.

kanao accepts his offer to help, allowing her fingers to mesh with eita’s. it makes the blood rush to his cheeks, so he tilts his neck downwards, away from her gaze. this, kanao fails to notice, more focused on getting herself back on her feet. as she rises up to her feet, she tightens her grasp around his fingers, allowing more blood to flow to her cheeks, painting them deep red, making him almost drop her to the ground when he lifts his fingers off her hold. but kanao is quick to stand up, and she clamors, warning him, “you almost let go, eita.”

“i’m sorry about that too.” he apologises again. this time for almost dropping her, and his gaze still stays on the concrete rather than focusing on hers. she doesn’t think of it much, but she worries her dress has been ruined. kanao dusts the soil particles off her white dress before she turns towards the house across the street to wait for takechi’s arrival, forgiving eita in the process, “it’s okay.”

eita mumbles, “thanks.” she hums at him, avoiding offering him a glance, and continues to peek at takechi’s house.

the blood rush in his cheeks dies down after a few seconds, but the memory of kanao’s touch against his skin somehow lingers as one of his fondest ones. it makes him wonder if he really likes kanao more than what he lets himself and the people around him believe. it’s not like he doesn’t already have an idea about his feelings. in fact, on various occasions, whenever he has looked at her laughing under the orange skies and the shadow of the setting sun, the peachy hue reflecting against her soft, shiny skin, the scenario has coerced him to give his feelings a thought. even if it was just for a while, and the thoughts faded away as briskly as they appeared to him.

at the end of the day, those thoughts were only vacant to him, like his feelings towards her hold no mass whatsoever, like having a crush on your neighbour isn’t physically possibly for him, like eita could never love someone that way because he has never known love like that before. like a first glance into what romantic love cannot come to him at twelve. semi eita might like kanao shimada but it has nothing to do with love. the thought swarming his mind is bristled off when he decides he’s probing into it far too much.

although they’ve been friends for almost half an year now, eita has never had kanao touch him for more than a brief moment before this. sure, her skin has brushed past his on countless occasions. she has also held his hand, but she has also let it go just as quick. this, however, is a first for him. the blood rush is nothing much to think over at all. it existed in the moment because he was too flustered by a first time thing. that’s all there is to it. eita can never love kanao. that’s a stretch too far. he might like her, but love is a no go.

“just don’t ask about it again.” kanao requests him, and he hums in agreement, deciding to wait for the surprise rather than imposing.

she invited takechi and him over to her place for something special but never mentioned exactly what it was supposed to be. she said, and he quotes, “there’s something very special i want to show you guys, so make sure you come prepared tomorrow.”

now, there could be a lot of things kanao might want to show him and his friend. a lot of things she might be referring to that eita already knows exist, or perhaps it’s something he’s a complete stranger to.

maybe it’s her pet dog, who eita has seen sauntering around her front yard, and the one who barks too much. so much so that eita can barely sleep at night ever since her family moved across. maybe it’s a new board game she bought. something new for them to play as a trio. he can only guess so much. eita doesn’t know what it’s like to be surprised. his only friend is takechi and he has nothing but a shit ton of crap packed up his sleeve, so this experience is new to him.

takechi arrives, huffing as he bends over his knees to catch a breath, after running down his stairs and across the street to be here on time. kanao sighs, looking at his state in worry, “you could’ve walked here, you know.” she says, reaching out for the water bottle sitting on the swing.

“eita and i would’ve waited.” she tells him, handing him the water bottle in her hands. he takes it off her, quaffing half of it before handing it back. “thanks.” he lets out a breathily, leaning onto her gates, waiting for his nerves to calm down that were under pressure due to his speed.

“okay, guys, let’s go inside.” kanao announces when she notices that takechi’s breathing returning to normal, taking eita by the hand and gesturing the other boy to follow them.

kanao’s touch against his skin and her finger wrapped around his own might not mean much to anyone else, but it makes his blood hot, and it pools at his cheeks. for a second time today, eita finds himself swamped in a feeling he possibly cannot put into words. although he convinced himself earlier that his red blotted cheeks meant nothing, he’s starting to realise, experiencing a blood rush second time today, he might’ve been grossly wrong about it. however, no one else notices because takechi is falling behind as they jog through the hallways of her house, and kanao looks up ahead, not sparing him a glance.

when she finally stops in front of a certain door, her grip against his hand tightens, and eita’s cheeks burn a shade darker, but thanks to the dull lighting scattered around the hallway, when she turns to the side to smile at him, she can barely make out the red gracing his cheeks gazing in awe at her parted lips. takechi stops right behind them, gesturing her to finally show them to their surprise, huffing because she made them sprint to the room, “are we here finally?”

“my legs hurt.” he whines, reducing himself on his knees to express exhaustion.

“we sure are.” kanao confirms his doubt, lips extending furthermore, curving further upwards as she abandons eita’s hand, and holds out her own to aid takechi.

once she gets him to his feet, she opens the door before them, welcoming their eyes to behold the surprise, walking two steps ahead inside of the room, reaching out for eita’s hand again. the red colour that had evaporating off his cheeks after she let go of his hand earlier, condenses along his cheekbones once again.

she introduces them to the room, light giggles intervening her words, “this is otosan’s studio. this is where he makes music.”

“i asked him if i could show it to you guys, and he agreed. isn’t it really cool?” she raises her brows, flaunting the sight in front of them that is her proud possession.

“truly the best room in the house.” she drops eita’s hand, and spreads her own two to the sides to showcase the splendor of the room her two friends are standing outside.

when she loses his hand, eita’s thumping heart regains it’s normal rhythm and the redness on his cheeks begins to dissipate. his eyes begin to glow more and more at the sight before him. what he’s seeing right now, he doesn’t know how to describe, how to put into words, except that it’s like a museum holding some of her father’s most prized possessions.

kanao’s father is a musician. this, she has mentioned on several occasions before. but the scale of his works has always been a mystery to takechi and him. however, the studio in front of them says enough about just how big her father really is, and the amount of equipment makes eita realise he doesn’t know much about music or anything at all. everything around him is foreign to him. the only instrument he really recognises is a guitar that looks a little funky, but it’s skeleton is more or less like the one he had seen at his place a few years ago.

“well, come on in, i want to show you something i’ve been working on.” kanao invites them to follow her lead, ambling a few steps ahead as she herself admires the view around her, but when she turns around to see them anchored in the same position, eyes wafting around the room in awe, she falls back, taking eita’s as well as takechi’s hand in her own, dragging them inside alongside herself.

he’s so mesmerized by the beauty of the place that eita forgets to notice his skin is in close contact with kanao’s for the third time today, and this time around, his cheeks don’t glow a shade of bright red, but his eyes glimmer in a revenant awe as he scans the place while she leads them to some distant part of the room.

“this is my guitar. i am learning to play it.” she lets loose of their hands, snapping her fingers at their faces, demanding them to match her gaze instead of hawking at the walls adorned with instruments, certificates and records. him and takechi snap back to reality in an instant, the view of kanao standing in her white dress with a guitar just a few centimeters short of her carefully nestled in her hands greeting them.

“do you want to hold it, eita?” she offers him the guitar, lightly pushing it his way, certainly complimenting him when she says, “you look like the kind who would be into guitars, i don’t know.”

“you just seem like it.” she giggles as she surmises, voice faltering towards the end when he doesn’t respond or react to her, only blankly staring at her, and she speaks the same thought once again, almost in a whisper, “it’s just that i just think you do.”

“i would love to.“ eita agrees quickly when he notes that his lack of response upset her, sensing the way her voice changed from that filled with excitement to one weighed down by nervousness.

he takes the guitar off her hands, aware he’s a stranger to the instrument and the art. he knows absolutely nothing about the instrument other than it’s physical skeleton, and that playing it with a plectrum is much more convenient than playing it with his bare fingers. despite his unfamiliarity to the instrument, he stands there, kanao’s guitar carefully tucked in his hands, ready to pluck its strings to produce new melody. she hands him her plectrum embossed with little pink flowers all over it’s body. eita takes a deep breath before he lets the plectrum stagger down the path of guitar strings, strumming a tune that’s foreign to everyone in room.

he’s no musician, so whatever melody falls into the space around the trio of friends sounds nothing spectacular. in fact, it almost makes takechi screw his fingers into his ears, and kanao flinches her face muscles at the tune eita creates with her guitar under his hold. she sighs, stepping closer, making an offer, “can i help you a little?” eita nods in agreement when he looks at the expressions sitting on kanao and takechi’s faces following his performance, only vaguely regretting his decision to accept the guitar from her in the first place.

kanao approaches eita from the back, placing her left palm on the headstock of the guitar, and her right palm next to eita’s hand, almost making him jump in place when he senses her skin brushing over his own. she seizes control of his right hand, arresting it under her control. this is the closest he has been to her, and it takes him everything in this goddamn universe to control himself from combusting into flames right in this moment. eita’s cheeks begin flashing red, his heart ready to leap out of his chest at any given moment as kanao’s hand lifts his right hand to strike the guitar strings appropriately.

takechi doesn’t fail to notice the pink shade that lines eita’s cheek bone augmenting darker by the moment. he takes a few steps back, deciding to leave without anyone taking a note of it. he walks out of the room, careful steps leading him away from kanao and eita. he chooses not to say anything as he walks out, and neither eita, nor kanao realise they’re one person short of their trio.

kanao allows the plectrum in eita’s hand to pluck the strings, guiding him into producing a melody that sounds much better than what his solo did. she tells him, sliding the plectrum across another string to produce a sharp note, pausing midway, “i started playing when i was seven.”

“i was never confident in my abilities, so i never told my friends from school about it.” she fesses, pursing her lips at the thought, feeling the pressure of her shortcomings slowly brewing up to reach her throat. but she compresses it to her gut, resuming as she admits, “but i wanted to show you, so here i am.”

“and here you are, holding the same guitar that got me into this in the first place.” kanao’s hand navigate eita’s, permitting a few more notes to be produced as the plectrum glides across the six strings of the instruments.

“you’re quite good.” eita compliments her, sewing a smile onto her lips, and she’s almost about to kiss him on the cheek but retaliates to avoid tension between the two of them.

her tone makes it obvious that she isn’t confident in her abilities as a musician, and he wonders why she would think so, when clearly, she’s a maestro at it and she’s only thirteen right now. he supposes doubting one’s abilities comes naturally to most people, and although there is much more she’s destined to learn about the art she’s engaging herself into, her reach right now just isn’t enough for her to be content with.

eita decides he likes this. he’s enjoying every moment of this. every time his hand moves at the order of kanao’s, something new takes shape, and while there are only seven notes in music as far as he knows, a tune distinct than the last one is created every time the plectrum held between his fingers strikes the strings.

he’s growing fond of it. the sound of the guitar buzzing in his peripheral overflows his heart with certain happiness, and more than anything, eita thinks he wants to keep doing this for a lifetime. kanao maybe a part of the reason why it makes him so happy, but he’s quite sure, more than anything, he has fallen in love with the instrument. it maybe his first time playing, but eita could go on guiding the plectrum to create new melodies for a lifetime without any regret following him.

but a part of him also knows the intimacy between kanao and him is also one of the reasons why adrenaline is sprinting through his veins, and his heart is thumping to and fro against his rib cage. at twelve, he knows almost nothing about romantic love, nor does he think he’s supposed to be acquainted to it. sure, he’s heard of it like everyone else in the world has, but to experience it is another thing. he also knows sakura from his class is ‘in love’ with shota from class four, and just because they’re twelve, doesn’t make their feelings invalid. but he isn’t in love. this much he knows. it’s just a crush.

one thing he’s sure of is that kanao makes him happy. around her, eita’s lips glazed with the orange juice her okaasan offers them each evening, stretch apart a littler wider than they do in response to takechi’s stupid humor. his voice, usually suppressed by his introverted nature, comes out a little happier, a little louder than it does on other occasions. this is proof enough for him to know that her presence in his life is of utmost importance to him. without her, eita is more or less like an empty shell that only echoes when someone speaks through it. takechi is his friend too, but with kanao, there are butterflies in his stomach and the urge to be a happier version of himself is glances through clear enough.

eita definitely doesn’t want to lose her, so he never thinks about his feelings much. for something as trivial as a crush, he doesn’t want to blow off his chance of having her as a friend for a lifetime, so he never really thinks about his feelings much or at all. he always brushes them off his mind like the empty thoughts he deems they are. but right, with kanao standing so close to him, holding his hand, introducing him to something he now wants to explore in depth for the rest of his life, eita’s heart can’t help but perform summersaults around his chest in utmost glee.

“i think i should get going now.” eita speaks up, stuttering around his words when he notices takechi’s absence. with not only his cheeks, but his ears fuming a bright shade of red as well, he decides staying around longer wouldn’t be wise by any means. he bows down to kanao in an apology, saying, “i’m sorry, okaasan must be waiting for me.” he dashes towards the door to the studio, looking back, forming a content smile on his lips, “let’s do this again.”

he jogs away, leaving her bereft with her guitar in the largest room in her house. she doesn’t understand much about the implications of his sudden action, but a smile sits firmly on the edges of her lips when she thinks about how she overcame her biggest fear, revealing about her talent to the guy she likes a little more than just a friend. extending an invitation to takechi was just a formality for him to not feel left out, and for her to not succumb under the pressure of her feelings for eita.

shimada kanao’s father signs a contract with a label in osaka. the label operates on a much larger scale and has a reach farther than the one he was signed with in miyagi. he gets offered a position to work on new music with a better label, and he takes it, plucking a petal off eita’s happiness unknowingly, when he tells kanao they need to move away.

she informs eita of her father’s plans, sweaty palms clutching onto the metal straps of her sling bag, fingertips cramping against the spaces between the metal blobs strewn together into a firm strand, her voice stuttering as words fall out, “i’m moving away next month.”

“where?” he simply asks her, finding it difficult to muster any other reaction to her sudden announcement, something he didn’t see coming on a slow, mellow afternoon, solely out of curiosity regarding the distance that will he separating the two of them for the rest of their lives.

“tokyo.” she tells him, fingers pressing firmer against the metal, nervousness gripping her bones as she waits for a reaction from his end.

eita doesn’t say anything in response to her, but he thinks about it by himself for a few moments. tokyo is pretty far. it’s a three hour drive from where he lives, and he knows he will never get the chance to visit her casually unless his family decides to take a short trip or something like that. he also knows kanao won’t be visiting him either. with both her parents being busy with their respective jobs, it’s nugatory to expect anything from her end at all. as for himself, his family isn’t outgoing, and the best they’ve done so far is to have movie nights on weekends.

so this is how it ends for them. he thinks it’s a rather bland ending to something he genuinely grew fond of over time. kanao’s friendship might’ve been something that was forced upon eita by his mother out of her concern, but it didn’t take him much time to get accustomed to its presence in his life. he even ended up growing rather fond of it. and as much as he would love to deny it, in this moment, he doesn’t want to pull a curtain over his obvious feelings for her. whether they constitute love or not, he never found out, but the thought of her absence from his life henceforth only weighs his heart down in some kind of brutish sorrow. the sudden end of something so wonderful scathes his limbs and organs through and through, suppressing his words alongside, staving him off a response.

eita nods at kanao’s ‘tokyo’ that falls out rather indistinct, shrouded with the palpable nervousness that envelopes her. even he feels it rubbing at his edges with her sitting right across him, and how it slowly transmutes into sorrow, now that she’s over the initial concern of putting out the announcement. it’s indication enough she isn’t exactly glad about this either. he knows this isn’t her fault. it isn’t anyone’s to begin with. but he can’t help but feel bitter. he can’t help but refuse to talk to her furthermore. though he isn’t exactly angry at her, eita can’t help but not say anything to her. so he only nods.

he allows a blank expression sit on his face as he swigs the hot chocolate he ordered for himself at the cafe she invited him to. it scalds his tongue, but the heat running across his epithelium doesn’t incite a reflex on his end. his mind has been anesthetized by her words, clueless he’s consuming something well above room temperature. the burn spreads through his tongue, scragging the surface cells, but that doesn’t seem to bother him much. or at all.

kanao looks at him with expectant eyes, nails practically digging into the metal of her strap at this point, and if she were to continue for a while longer, the force would be heavy enough to leave a few dents behind. she wants eita to say something in response. she knows her announcement was something he definitely didn’t see coming, and she knows it’s rather heartless to expect him to be lively about it, but his silence isn’t helping her either. it’s only making her heart flip in a burning anxiety.

he recognizes the expression in her eyes. they’re lined with tear drops ready to descend any time now. “mhm.” eita hums as a response, because really, the numbness is strangling his thoughts and his words, and as much as he wants to say something, he’s too upset to. but he doesn’t want to leave her barren without a response either. he doesn’t want her to think he hates her for this. because he doesn’t.

the urge to walk out without exchanging words is so so strong that he pushes his cup of hot chocolate across the table towards her, almost stepping out of his seat. but he pauses midway when kanao’s fingers abandon the metal strap and proceed to touch his knuckles in order to stop him, when she realises what he’s about to do.

takechi didn’t show up despite kanao’s invitation to him. he has better things to do, or so he told her when she asked him why he wouldn’t join them. kanao intended for him to be there because she knew eita wouldn’t take the news smoothly. with no damage control in place, his world seems to crumble down even faster, and the rubble tumbles somewhere far off, spurning the opportunity for him to keep it together.

by no means does the slurry of emotions clogging his throat stem from the loss of love. the love in question was never found to begin with. eita never confessed to kanao. he never told her or anyone else that he liked her. he never tried finding out if what he felt was anything more than just a crush. love was indeed a stretch, something too far to leap into, but whatever he felt was never vocalized. takechi had some idea, but that’s all there was to it.

whatever he’s feeling, he thinks, precipitates due to the potential loss of someone who understood him. before eita found out about his feelings for kanao, she was a good friend to him. developing a crush didn’t change that either. even if their friendship was just a matter of an year or so, she managed to offer him some of his best memories. she managed to understand him better than most people around him. and sure, takechi is a good friend as well, but eita always thought he fit in better with kanao. like two neighboring pieces of the same puzzle that complete it. like the morning coffee his father has with some buttered toast. like eita and kanao themselves, who were inseparable once they became friends about an year ago.

“say something, eita.” kanao pleads, cold fingers pressing against his skin to extract a response, scuttling through her words to him.

she didn’t expect eita to be happy about this of course. but she didn’t expect him to be as speechless and crestfallen as he is either. she’s only a friend to him after all. he will eventually find a new one. everybody makes new friends and loses some from time to time. if she was someone more than just a friend, if there was something more between the two of them, things would’ve been different.

the thing is, kanao really really likes eita. she likes him more than just a friend. for her, the boundary between platonic feelings and romantic ones blurred long ago. but she’s quite sure he doesn’t look at her the same way and he never will. she will never mean anything more to him than just a friend. this much, she surmised on her own terms without ever asking him about it.

as she looks at him resting on the chair across her with a bland expression glazing his otherwise smiling face, the one last thing she wants from his end is a response worthy of all the love she has offered him as a friend, to put her own aching heart to ease.

but he walks out of the cafe, leaving behind the paper cup holding his choice of preferred drink, leaving behind kanao who only expected a few words from his side to comfort herself, leaving behind two broken hearts on the table in a random cafe at half past three on a balmy summer afternoon. her words echo in the air as fresh as ever, even as he walks off, and while she looks at him from her seat, fingers digging into the leather of her bag in an attempt to suppress the cry that irks at her throat, she knows this is probably the last time she’s seeing him. she knows he won’t be around as much as he used to be. she knows over the span of next month or so, she’s scheduled to buckle up for a course to learn how to cope with his absence.

however, there is one thing kanao can be sure of without a doubt, and it’s the only thing that’s partly putting her at ease right now. semi eita doesn’t hate her. he might resent the circumstances. he might pretend like he doesn’t care about her absence. he might not talk to her. but of all the people in the world, her friend, eita will never hate her for something that isn’t her fault to begin with.

on the day she leaves for tokyo, and leaves eita behind with his broken heart trying to hold in the feelings without letting them spill, she says to him, lightly holding his hands in hers, right in front of the house that he’s convinced is cursed, not haunted, but cursed for sure, “we’ll see each other again.”

she fabricates her lips to curl into a vague smile that’s ninety percent fake and ten percent an attempt to reassure him, an attempt to pencil in a smile on his face as well. eita hasn’t talked to her in a month at all, and if this is the last time she’s seeing him eye to eye, she wants to listen to him talk, even if it’s just a line or two.

she expects a response from him. while she’s trying her best to reassure him, she needs something from his end as a token of reassurance as well. something she can hold onto in osaka while she’s alone in midst of new people. bereft with a broken heart of full of feelings for a boy she was never able to confess her affection to.

but eita, just like a month ago, doesn’t respond. not even with a hum. words are a far cry. but he nods at her just like he did in the cafe over two cups of belgian hot chocolate and two broken hearts tossed across the table.

“we’ll keep in touch.” she pats his knuckles, pursing her lips, stretching them furthermore in an attempt to enhance her fake smile. but even with that, eita has nothing to say to her. instead, he wiggles his palms, urging her to let go. his reluctance towards her dulls her smile that was a stopgap to begin with.

she swiftly takes her hand back and holds it in air to receive a fist bump. she doesn’t expect him to return this gesture either, but eita pushes his closed fist against hers. soft like a pellet of cotton tending to her wounds. his touch stings, not because it’s forceful like it usually is, but because the absence of enthusiasm is obvious, and the dullness his souls precipitates into with every passing second is palpable enough.

kanao leaves his sight, jogging to unite with her father who is patiently waiting on her to seal her final goodbye. she hollers him to bend to her level, whispering something in his ear. in response, he hands her the guitar that’s too familiar to eita. she takes careful steps back to him, guitar case hanging in her left hand, only making him wonder more and more about what she’s upto. now that they’ve said goodbye, he doesn’t think she needs to come back for a do over.

she hands him the guitar, extending the case further away from her, closer to him, voice barely accounting for a whisper, “take it.”

it’s the same guitar she displayed last year when she chose to open up about her hobby. the same guitar that acted as an inspiration for him to pursue music. the same one that catalyzed the intimacy between the two of them. the same one he learnt to tune his first song on. the same one that made him confirm his feelings for kanao.

as much as he wants to keep it as a reminder of what could’ve been or what was, eita declines, lightly pushing the case away. he knows this isn’t right. no matter how close they were as friends, accepting her guitar as a gift isn’t something he feels worthy of. but more than morals, it’s financial to him. a parting gift would be great compensation from her end, but accepting something so expensive doesn’t seem right when he has nothing to offer himself.

“take it.” she repeats, a little louder this time, pushing the case in his direction, requesting him, “please.”

despite eita’s repudiation, her otosan insists on letting eita have her old guitar, informing him that she has a new one waiting for her at their place in osaka. now, with a gift so expensive sitting in his trembling hands, he thinks it’s only right to respond to her. so far, his emotions have been resisting him from talking to her, believing he might break down if he were to do so, but now with her guitar case bereft in his hand, eita promises, “hey, kanao, i’ll make sure to learn a lot of new songs.”

his voice echoing in her earshot restores a small, soft smile back on her lips, and eita continues, clutching the handle of the case tighter, fingers curling in until the metal leaves a mark on his skin, gulping down the stutter waiting to fall out in order to sound perfectly audible, “so when we meet again, we can play music together.”

the smile etched into her lips spreads apart, and for the first time in the last few days, her curving lips aren’t drenched in deception, and they don’t drip in the pity she’s harboring for herself. hearing eita’s voice clearly for the first time in a month, listening to him addressing herself makes her the happiest she has been since her father broke the news to her.

kanao leaves miyagi. eita stops talking much. the people around him fail to notice the lack of words from him. he was never a talker to begin with, but her absence restricts him furthermore, and he feels it strongly, while everyone around him moves on with their lives, thinking he has always been like that. silent and reserved.

she texts him from tokyo, rambling about her new classmates, and about her she fear of starting conversations because the kids look pretty intimidating. she talks about how tokyo is different from miyagi but all the same, all at once. eita tells her about the new music he learns to play on the guitar she left behind. though he wants to tell her he misses her, that text never goes through, the fear of making things awkward separates his finger from the send button just as quickly as the text was written.

the smile on his face dulls, and whenever okaasan tells him something nice, his lips only extend a millimeter or two at most. the sound of his voice becomes inaudible as ever, and obaasan has the toughest time talking to him, the capacity of her ears withering at the toll of her age. eita, who always laughs at even the stupidest of jokes that takechi spews, stops that. now, only a vague chuckle leaves the space between his lips in response to those.

sometime during winter, the texts from kanao’s end hit a sudden stop. the last she texts him is right before christmas, describing the decorations the city has put up for the occasion. her vibrant texts describing a jolly, red and white osaka are followed by nothing. nothing in terms of content, but everything in terms of emotions, all at once, like the lasting beep of a vitals monitor at a hospital belonging to someone who just died. like the monitor belongs to eita himself. kanao’s promise ends up as a group of empty words. and e m p t y, is exactly what eita feels over the next few months.

somewhere in a small neighborhood in miyagi, where everyone knows each other and rumors spread faster than butter on a slice of bread, the friendship that once blossomed under warm summer skies, quickly withers under the heat of the same sun, succumbing under the pressure of distance.

kanao’s departure breaks eita’s heart.

#haikyuu fanfiction #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x y/n #haikyuu x you #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu angst #haikyuu #haikyuu anime #haikyuu manga #haikyuu fic #haikyuu headcanons #semi eita #semi x y/n #semi x you #semi x reader #hq semi #shiratorizawa

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ninapi · 1 year

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Save me (Semi Version)

Premise: Semi never thought he would find love where his insecurities laid deep, he never thought someone so broken could be so full of love, he never thought he needed to feel loved as much until he met you.

World Count: 2173

Chapter 6: Good Ending

Youth goes by so fast, when you are younger all you want to do is to be an adult and when the time comes, there’s nothing you can do to go back to those days where things were simpler.

Things were bound to change once high school was over for the both of you.

But you got to learn that change isn’t always so bad.

Your boyfriend accepted his true nature after many sleepless nights where feelings and expectations were shared. He wanted to explore his love for music, saying you made him want to be himself, believe in himself. It didn’t matter anymore if Shirabu was a better setter or if Ushijima would go for the pro-league, they were chasing who they truly wanted to be, and he would do the same, even Tendo accepted he wanted nothing to do with the sport anymore and wanted to go into the food industry. Everything would change quickly. Accepting yourself and embracing those around you can really make an impact in your future.

Of course, his parents didn’t want him to have a lousy life as an adult, the life of a rockstar not being what they envisioned for their beloved son; so, he promised to go to university and get an actual job while also pursuing his dream. No one had to lose when he could do both and give his parents peace of mind.

As for you, you had to wait a year on your own before having to experience adulthood, but by the time Semi was out of high school you were able to go out on your own and life went pretty much on as you always wanted school to be. You got upgraded from your position and were appointed president of the student council in your last year. At first it seemed like more than you could handle, but that was just what you needed to start building that impressive resume you’ve been wanting to work on from the start.

Your last year of school was uneventful, and you were ready to move on to the next chapter of your life.

Both, you and your boyfriend were aiming for a job in your local government, hence, you got in the same university and same major, making life easier for you as he had already gone through the material given in classes and could help you understand better what was going on, making the transition not as painful as it was for others.

You would hear from your old friends from Semi from time to time, Ushijima being as famous as someone can be in the industry, was very hard to reach and you were just happy to know he was able to achieve and fulfill his dream. Not like you doubted he ever would, he’s always been the shiniest star. Tendo keeps you both up to date with the happenings of the rest of the team, face-timing with you guys often.

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Life as an adult is complicated. So much to think about, taxes, bills, supermarket sale days. But sharing your workspace with your boyfriend made you look forward to each day. Being in different sectors of the governmental chain just complimented your work-life balance to perfection and you both could still eat lunch together every day like you used to during high school, it felt nice, not everything had changed even when time doesn’t stop for anybody.

Semi’s band was actually pretty famous around the underground concert venues. They even landed a nice record deal not too long ago, though, it still feels a bit weird listening to a song in the radio that you know is about you.

He is in charge of writing all the lyrics for his band and let’s just say 99% of them are about your relationship. From sappy love songs to very deep ones about understanding and belonging; his beautiful sorrowful voice being the reason of their popularity. The fact that the five of them were pretty boys with bad boy auras being just a bonus.

Though, even if they were decently popular, he never mentioned anything about becoming a full-time artist. He had a goal and was not one to jeopardize his future over short-term fame. But he would always get dodgy when asked about this ‘goal’ of his, keeping it a secret from you for years.

You met Tōru again after years of not seeing him, he went away to Argentina to make his dreams come true and you couldn’t be prouder of him. He listened to your advice and even if it took a while, he looked like he was living his best life. You went with him and Iwaizumi to his therapy sessions and even participate in some of them for a solid year and a half until you saw a big change on him. He stopped clinging onto the past, stopped sending you messages saying he missed you at random times of the night when he felt lonely, his outbursts of temper stopped completely after a while, and you all knew he was ready to continue on his path to greatness. He came to this world to do great things and you were just happy to be a healthy part of his life like you always wished to be at last.

He called you in as soon as he came back to Japan and invited you to his match. Meeting all your friends after such a long time was incredible, you even saw Tobio there, who was very much surprised and terrified when he saw you go in the gym and hug Oikawa, all his nightmares becoming reality before his eyes, thankfully, it was a misunderstanding.

It was an awesome day, a day to remember the good old days, re-live your treasured memories with your beloved childhood friend and your at that time, loving boyfriend. It was hard getting to where you were right now, but it was all worth it.

You also saw Ushijima that day, but you were definitely not expecting getting hugged by him. He just seemed so relieved to see you were in good health and that you still remembered who he was, to be able to see that beautiful smile he still dreams about once more, he couldn't contain his own body. His adorable display of affection causing an uproar in his team and Semi to go into some sort of regression to his not so confident self once more.

He’s done all he can to be a decent adult. He went to university and graduated. Landed a good job. Has treated you nicely all these years. But what if seeing all mighty Ushiwaka sways you to his side. What if the promise of a future being the wife of a national star with a big house, kids and a dog is what you wanted? Even the prime minister wanted a selfie with him once.

His spiraling had stopped years ago. He was confident enough in what you guys had and he knows for a fact that you two built it all together, it was not all just him, you were also giving your best to keep the relationship as active and loving as it could be and you’ve done it for years, never really failing him. He should know that you wouldn’t be swayed by Japan’s volleyball sweetheart or the handsome international star that had you snuggled up his side at this very moment trying to keep you away from Ushijima, he should know where your heart really was, but he’s always been this way and needed validation.

That night Semi refused to take you to your apartment, taking a detour. He was quiet the entire time, not wanting to voice his insecurities, but unable to mask his discomfort.

“Baby, is something wrong? I haven’t seen that constipated look in your face for years. Is this about Ushijima-san?” he usually loves how well you know him but hated it just as much when it came to moments like this. “It’s nothing. I just wanted to show you something. I was actually saving this for another time, you know, not for after a 'We love (Y/N) fanclub' meet and greet day, but you know how things are with me, I get restless. So, sorry if it isn’t as big of a surprise as I had planned for it to be.”

He stopped by one of your favorite places in town. He had taken you there the first time you visited his parents’ home. It was a lovely spot up a hill where you had the best view of the sunset, a little bench overlooking the river. This spot became a staple throughout your relationship. You had your first fight there, your first heated kiss, even some of the deepest conversations you’ve had in the history of all your relationship, all have been there. Behind that little bench, across the street, there was a big European style house very much abandoned. Weeds were growing everywhere, almost consuming the house completely. You used to tease him all the time saying one day you would buy that house and restore it all on your own and would become your secret hideaway for whenever you didn’t want to see his face, but the house wasn’t even for sale, it was all teasing to see the cute pout and scowl combo you loved so dearly.

It was in bad conditions, but it wasn’t terrible, it looked almost like a fairy tale house in a secluded area of the town, but you used to go there all the time, to you it wasn’t secluded, it was ideal.

Your boyfriend was now climbing over the fence of said house, causing an alarmed squeak out of you, “Eita, what are you doing? We’ll get in troubles! This has to be private property, we can’t just go in! What if we get arrested!” you whispered-yelled, pulling on his hand as hard as you could to get him back to safety. “Oh yeah, it is private property. Though, pretty sure the owner wouldn’t mind his beautiful girlfriend going into her new house.” the gasp that left your lips was the loudest he’d ever heard, making his grin grow impossibly wider, “YOU DIDN’T!!” squealing, you jumped in his arms forgetting the fence and all, he spooned you around, planting a messy peck on your lips, “I so did.” you had to be dreaming, just when you thought this day couldn’t get any better. “But how? I didn’t even know it was for sale! And just how did you get the money for this?” running around to look for your way in, you were yelling at this point, “I’ve been saving for a while, since it is a fixer-upper it was rather cheap. And well, let’s just say, working in the government has its perks when it comes to permits and what not.” finding your way over to him, you could see his boyish smile, even a faint hint of pink dusting his handsome face, “We’ll have to work hard to make it look presentable though, seems like a lifetime project.” his words made you tackle him to the ground, kissing his very soul, “Do you like it that much?” he hasn’t laughed like this in a while, it felt great, all the negative feelings he had just minutes ago sent to oblivion and replaced by your loving kisses and giggles.

Having a stuck-up job wasn’t ideal for him but he was glad he did as he did, he was able to save the money he needed and accomplished his goal, while also having a good time with his band mates and the love of his life. He couldn’t complaint even if he wanted to, life had been good to him.

All he could think for a while was how he wanted you to be happy, how he wanted you to continue having that safe happy life you’ve both crafted over time, he wanted you to have everything you always wanted and when he saw the way you looked at the little house you were in right now he just made it his goal to get it for you secretly, he didn’t know how long it would take but he just hopped you would still be by his side when the time came, “Are you kidding me? I love it! It's even better than I thought it was!”

“So, are you willing to spend the rest of your life here with me fixing the mess of a house you wanted, garden mouse?” the implications of that question were heavier than what it looked from the outside, this was a commitment, his own way of securing a future with his one true love.

“For as long as you'd have me. Always.” sealing the promise with a never-ending kiss, the future that once was gloomy and uncertain became the brightest there was to offer for two broken souls in need of company, healing and understanding. The house was almost symbolic. Broken, fragile, needing repairs, just the way you were when you met him, just the way he was when he met you, but with nurturing love, patience and a lot of work, things shine brighter than expected with time.

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Note: there will be a surprise bonus chapter next week~ 👀 before we go into big heavy muscle mode.

Tagged babes: @dazaisfavgf, @lauraagrace

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