#Little would be like this is why i have to be a cruel horrible freak when we play mario kart

[majorxmaggiexboy]

ngl modern!era Jopson would absolutely kill it at time/resource management games like he’d be on To The Rescue! Dog Shelter Simulator running a dang empire

#thomas jopson #edward little: *Playing papa louie arcade with tears in his eyes* #jopson: *runs games like clockwork machinery* they are not the same #Little would be like this is why i have to be a cruel horrible freak when we play mario kart

[lostgirlmuseum]

The Signal

Made this using images from Pinterest ^ Word Count: 6.1k 

Pairing: Bucky x f!reader

Summary: You and Bucky get separated from the team after an unfortunate mishap, of which Bucky blames you. Except you’re not at fault! You thought… you aren’t too sure anymore.

A/N: Thank you all so much for all of the positivity on my first fic, I am actually BLOWN AWAY. You are all so kind!! I actually started writing this all the way back in February of 2022, but seeing the response gave me the motivation to finally finish it. 

Warnings: Nothing absolutely horrible, just a bit of angst and fluff(?), plus a little gaslighting and violence.

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“Everything is going to be okay. We’re fine. Everything is fine. Everything–” She repeated the mantra over and over again, not quite believing it.

“Will you shut up?” Bucky growled. 

Only an hour prior had both of them been sneaking through a dense forest and scoping out a running ex-HYDRA base deep in the frozen woods. Steve, Bucky, Natasha, Sam, and Y/N were used to missions like this, except this one required a higher level of subtlety and a successful sneak attack was critical. Their intel informed them that the base was rigged to blow if any unrecognized technology was detected, including any disturbances in the radio waves. Because of this, they all turned off their communications signals once they approached the range of the base. At least, they were supposed to.

“I’m just trying to keep myself from freaking out.” She grumbled, slightly trailing behind Bucky as they crunched through the brittle layer of snow.

“Why? You should be freaking out. You should very much be freaking out right now. Considering we’re stranded in the middle of nowhere, with no connection to anyone who can help, and I’m stuck with you.” He recognized he was being cruel, but he didn’t have the strength to stop.

“It wasn’t my fault!” 

“The sooner you stop lying to yourself, the better.” Bucky responded without even looking over his shoulder. He hadn’t looked at her for the majority of their trek to the nearest safe house since they got separated from the rest of the group by the explosion.

“This is not my damn fault! I turned off my signal, just like Steve told us to.” She struggled to keep up with him, but she wouldn’t tell him that. She couldn’t show him any weakness–he’d just use it against her.

“Except you didn’t!”

“How are you so sure it was me? There were five of us!” She awkwardly jogged to get a bit ahead of him, and turned around to face him as she walked backward. “What makes you think it wasn’t you?”

“Please, like I would ever be so careless.” His gaze remained on the terrain ahead, and it looked like the trees of the woods were starting to thin out, signaling an exit soon.

“And I would?”

“Yes! Yes, you would. I knew from the start it was a bad idea to take you along. You can’t even follow simple instructions like turning off a signal.” He managed to pass her again, leaving her to struggle to stay next to him. He saw out of the corner of his eye her pointing a finger at him.

“I’m trying really hard not to take your attitude personally. You’ve been acting like a dick for the past week, but I’m sick of it.”

“Whatever you say, sweetheart.” 

“Don’t call me that.”

“Sweetheart?” He finally glanced at her. 

“Yes.”

“Why? Is it reserved for Steve?” Bucky’s eyes quickly returned to the path in front of him.

“What are you on about?” Genuine confusion laced her voice, but her question went unanswered as they reached a block in their path. 

“Y’know your genius safe house plan?” Bucky gestured to the map balled up in her hand, the thing they had been using to guide them to safety. “Well, looks like we’re here.”

“This can’t be right,” she shook her head, quickly unfolding the map, “maybe we got turned around.”

“Just look up.” 

She followed Bucky’s gaze to the sky, at which she finally realized the ridiculousness of their situation. They were stranded at the bottom of a steep cliff, which looked to stand nearly a hundred feet in the sky.

“You’ve got to be kidding.” Because who the fuck puts a safe house on top of a cliff? “There’s got to be an elevator or something, there’s no way we’re expected to climb this.”

They both scanned the base of the cliff, looking for any indication of a secret passage to the top. She ran her hand along the jagged rock and ice, and bit her bottom lip as she concentrated on the wall, eventually spotting a thick rope among a couple vines. 

“Shit.” 

Her voice gained Bucky’s attention, and he looked over to see her holding not one, but two ropes, each attached to a relatively large weaved basket. It wasn’t quite big enough for the two of them, but one person could definitely fit. 

“After you,” he mocked, gesturing to the basket that was meant to work as a (sketchy as hell) pulley system.

Instead of answering, she merely pointed to the inside of the damp basket. Bucky peered his head over to see the bottom had completely fallen apart, leaving a gaping hole where a person would supposedly stand. 

“Looks like we’re climbing.” Bucky sighed.

“I can’t–” 

“Afraid of heights?” He snapped.

“No, but–” 

“Good. Then there shouldn’t be a problem.” 

He grabbed a knife from his belt and efficiently cut both sides of the rope from the basket. She watched, dumbfounded, as he took one rope and tied it around his waist. Then, he gave the rope a hard tug, and satisfied by the lack of give, turned to his belt and grabbed three more knives. He grabbed duct tape out of his tac pants, and expertly taped one knife to the bottom of each shoe. Finally, he tossed her the duct tape, knowing she already had her own knives. She watched both impressed and annoyed as he firmly stuck his feet as best he could into the ice and rock of the cliff, and used the other knives in his hands as leverage.

He made it about ten feet up before glancing back down to see she hadn’t moved.

“Are you coming or what?” The impatience of his voice stung almost as much as the cold did her nose. 

She looked at him, then the rope, and then the knives attached to her legs, before making a move. Unlike Bucky, her combat boots came equipped with hidden spikes that could be used for climbing (although she had never used them for such activity, and normally used them as a treat when fighting, basking in the pride of catching her enemies off guard with a swift kick and metal spike to the face, groin, etc). She adjusted the spikes to be poking out of the toe of her boots, and tried not to think as she grabbed the second rope and knotted it around her waist. 

Ignoring her left hand, she grabbed only one knife opposed to Bucky’s two, and stabbed it into the ice. She cautiously looked down at her feet as she began her climb, and looked back up at her hand as she found purchase a foot above her head. Already exhausted from the fighting and explosion earlier, she winced at the tension in her right arm as she pulled herself up. 

At the slow pace she was going, Bucky was already 15 feet in the air by the time she was 3 feet off the ground.

Bucky looked down to see her far behind, and raised an eyebrow when he saw her climbing with only one hand.

“You’re supposed to use both hands, you know?” He mocked.

She rolled her eyes, but said nothing, as she let her left hand join her right hand on the handle of the knife protruding from the rock. Bucky noticed her silent grimace as she successfully pulled herself up to the next level. He continued to watch as she stiffly removed her right foot from the wall and placed it above her left foot, before once again grabbing the single knife with both her hands and pulling for a second before letting out an agonizing cry.

Out of curiosity more than frustration, he called down.

“What’s going on down there?” 

She briefly looked up at him before looking back at the ground, “I can’t climb.”

“Missed the training day on it?” 

His sarcasm went unappreciated as she growled.

“My wrist is broken, asshole.”

Her wrist is broken, and she’s climbing? What is she thinking?

“And you’re still trying to climb? You should’ve told me.” 

“I fucking tried telling you! But everytime I try to say something, you interrupt me! Constantly! Besides, what’s the point in telling you if you’re just going to brush it off?”

Bucky swiftly removed the knives in his hands from the cliff, and held onto his rope, before half-hopping and half-climbing down the wall to the ground.

“Bucky, just go,” she sighed, “I’ll figure something else out. I’m not going to be a burden on you.”

She said it in part because, yes, she didn’t want to burden him, but also because she didn’t want to hear his whiny complaints.

He ignored her protests and gently reached for her left hand, inspecting the incredibly swollen wrist. He winced at her soft whimper. He let go and simply looked at her.

“Hop down.” 

She didn’t like that he was ordering her around, but his voice was void of any emotion, and out of curiosity and self preservation skills, she obeyed.

“C’mon.” Bucky turned around so his back faced her.

After a couple moments of silence, he looked over his shoulder to see her face twisted in confusion.

“C’mon now, just get on.” He repeated, squatting down a bit more. “You’re going to have to hold on tight.”

Ignoring the absurdity of the situation, she did her best to climb onto his back, at which point he gently grabbed her non-injured arm and wrapped it around his neck to encourage her to not be afraid to cling to him.

After what likely was about twenty minutes of climbing in utter silence, minus the whipping of the cool wind, Bucky made the mistake of looking down. The good news was that they were almost at the top–probably about a quarter of the climb left. The bad news was that meant that they had already climbed about 75 feet, and despite Bucky’s fearless persona, he was not fearless.

“Fuck.” He whispered.

“What’s wrong?” She rested her chin on his right shoulder.

“Nothing… I just didn’t realize how high up we were.” He grimaced the moment he said it. He’d shown weakness. He’d given her ammo. “Gonna make fun of me now?” He started to shake just a little, and prayed that she would assume it was because of the cold and not his anxiety…even though it had been cold for the entirety of the climb.

“No.” She stated.

His head started to spin from the memories. He tried to push through it, but all he could think about was the first time he was this high up. It was as cold as this too. He felt as his left arm subconsciously twitched. 

The first time I was this high up, I still had two human arms.

A sweet voice interrupted his thoughts. 

“I think I can see the compound from here.” 

It was a stupid joke, but he couldn’t help but laugh a little.

“You know, I’m pretty scared of the ocean.” She continued.

He didn’t respond, unsure of where she was going with this. He continued to pull themselves up.

“Just deep water in general scares me. My brother always made fun of me for it.” 

Don’t look down, Bucky. Don’t look–

“One time when I was like–fifteen? I think? My family took a trip to this really big lake. We got on one of those pontoon boats and went out into the water.”

He was glad that she was so close to him, otherwise the whipping of the wind would’ve been too loud to hear her calming voice.

“My brother thought he was really funny, and told me to look over the edge of the boat while we were still in motion.”

He tried to grunt to indicate he was listening, but no noise came out.

“He pushed me right as my dad started speeding up. I fell in, and freaked out. Especially as I watched the boat leave me behind.”

He continued to listen to her and focused on her voice, and the vibrations. Her tone was casual, but he couldn’t help but sense she was telling him a secret.

“Luckily, my mom saw what happened, and got my dad to turn around.” She chuckled. “He claimed he was trying to help me get over my fear. But I got my revenge later that day, so it was fine.”

“What’d you do?” Bucky finally spoke up.

“Well, he’s afraid of peanut butter.” She tried to shrug, despite having one arm around his neck and the other hanging limply. 

“Do you mean allergic?”

“No, I mean afraid. The stuff freaks him out. He won’t go near it. He’s weird like that.” She sighed in remembrance, and continued.

“So once we got back to the house I grabbed some peanut butter, and slathered it into his hair when he wasn’t looking.”

Bucky looked up again and was surprised to see how close they were to the top. When did that happen?

“He screamed so loud–it was hilarious.” She smiled. “He ran to take a shower, flailing around and being dramatic. ‘Mom! She put peanut butter in my hair! My hair! Mommy, get it out!’” 

Worried that Bucky was judging her, she quickly added,

“He was seventeen at the time, by the way.”

Still no answer.

“I don’t think he’s forgiven me yet.” She whispered more to herself than Bucky, but he still nodded as he grabbed at the top of the cliff.

“We’re here.” Bucky didn’t mean for his voice to come across gruff, but the cold wasn’t helping his throat. 

“Thank you for carrying me.” She smiled once she had both feet on the ground. It didn’t reach her eyes, but he could still tell she meant it.

Slightly embarrassed, Bucky attempted to grumble out a ‘Thank you for distracting me,’ but he wasn’t sure she heard it.

Come on, you can do better than that Barnes. Just apologize to her, he thought.

“Listen, I know I’ve been acting like a–”

Bucky’s words were cut off by a mysterious and sudden mangled…shriek?

“Oh my God, Bucky.” She patted his arm to get him to turn around.

He obliged, and his eyes became saucers when he saw what had made the noise. 

At the top of the cliff was a partially snowy but also grassy plateau, inhabited by a herd of roaming goats. So, so many goats. 

“Look at all the goats!” She gasped.

Right as she had said it, one goat had snuck up to them and started biting at Bucky’s prosthetic. 

“Get off,” he quelled his shock and grumbled as he shook the animal off of his hand.

“Aw, it likes you.” She giggled, falling to her knees to pet the goat—more like ‘goats’, plural, because the animals seemed to multiply, and fast. 

“Let’s get inside. We need to fix that wrist.”

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Beside the disturbingly large population of goats, and the absurd location of the safe house, the house itself was fine. Well, it was shaped more like a barn, but it was decorated like a house. After coaxing Y/N away from the “adorable” (her words, not Bucky’s) goats, and inside, Bucky led Y/N to the forest green rug where he had started a fire in the fireplace. 

When he finished briefly looking around, Bucky grabbed some ice that had frozen outside the barn and wrapped it in a cloth from the kitchen. With her permission, Bucky carefully placed the ice pack where he saw the most bruising around her wrist. 

“So,” Bucky had settled himself across from her, so they could face each other as they talked. He couldn’t help the pang of sadness he felt as she stood up and backed away to sit on the couch.

She wouldn’t move away if I were Steve, he thought, staring into the fire. They’d probably cuddle up together like they do on the couch during movie nights at the tower. 

Y/N didn’t want to move away from Bucky, especially now that he was being amicable again. But the heat from the flames was melting the ice that cradled her wrist, and she didn’t want to add ‘soggy’ to her list of problems.

“So?” She asked, noticing Bucky never finished his thought.

“I’m just thinking about the logistics of this. There’s a high possibility we could be stuck here anywhere from a week to a month. Your signal was fried in the blast too, right?”

She nodded, and released her right hand from holding the ice, letting it balance on her wrist, as she reached into her jacket pocket and pulled out her signal. Definitely fried. 

He pulled out his own signal from where he had kept it in his pants pocket, and showed her how it was crushed. “Well, without our signals, our team can’t track us. We just have to hope that they’ll figure out that we made it to a safe house, and that they don’t check this one last. Because I’m pretty sure there are at least two more safehouses dedicated to the vicinity of the Hydra base, right?”

She nodded. “We got unlucky with this one.”

“First thing we need to worry about,” he raised his eyebrows, trying to gain her attention, “is food. I looked at the kitchen pretty quickly and there’s not that much stuff stocked. A couple cans of beans, and such. Not nearly enough for how long we’re going to be here though. So unless we want to climb back down again, and see if we can find any food anywhere…”

She squinted and tilted her head as if she was a confused puppy.

“We’re going to have to kill a goat.” He finished.

Her eyes went comically wide. “I am not letting you kill Cheetoh!”

Bucky shook his head, exasperated, “You’ve already named them?”

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The longer they were there, the worse the winds got. But that didn’t stop Bucky from hearing the strange overlap of whipping winds, leading him to lean into the noise from his spot on the couch. 

“Do you hear that?” Bucky nudged her.

“It sounds like the wind got a lot worse,” She nodded.

“No, something’s off.”

At Bucky’s concern, Y/N got up off the couch and beat him to the doors. She looked at Bucky, who stood directly behind her, before pushing hard to get the sliding door to budge. Instantly the biting cold attacked them again, and she had to place her right arm over her forehead to keep her hair from whipping into her eyes. Everything outside seemed to be an array of grays, until she was able to spot a shadowy figure emerge from the settling fog. A person appeared, as well as a helicopter.

“Sam?” She called, hoping her voice carried far enough to be heard above the wind.  

“Y/N! Bucky! Thank god you guys are okay,” Sam called back, and was quickly met by Y/N who had run the rest of the distance to meet him. Bucky was shortly behind. 

“I’ve never been so happy to see your face, Sam.” She giggled, setting her right hand appreciatively on his shoulder. 

Quickly spotting Steve exiting the chopper, Bucky hid a scowl as he watched Y/N light up and bound over to the bundled up blond, while calling, “Steve!” He wished he had looked away before seeing her pull him in for a hug.

Wanting to distance himself from the interaction, Bucky stood by Sam.

“How did you find us so fast?” Bucky shook his head, and raised his voice, as the wind started to pick up again. 

“My signal, man.” Sam yelled back, despite being three feet apart. 

“What?” Bucky wondered if he heard him right. 

Sam reached into the left pocket of Bucky’s under jacket, and pulled out a small familiar looking device. 

Bucky felt a punch to the gut as he suddenly remembered.

The group had just landed the quinjet deep into the forest. They couldn’t land too close to the base and risk setting off alarms, so they settled for a three mile hike away. Bucky and Sam were meant to approach from the north side, while Steve, Natasha, and Y/N planned to approach from the south side, so the group split off after the jet to take opposite round-a-bout paths. It was about two miles left to go when Sam started complaining. 

“Dude, does this thing actually fit in your ear?” Sam gestured to the communications device in his hand. “Because it keeps falling out. It’s getting on my nerves.”

Bucky gave a short grunt, which Sam translated to a ‘yes, it does fit in my ear.’

“I can’t,” Sam finally huffed, “I give up. I don’t have any pockets, can you hold this so I don’t lose it?” 

Simply wishing for Sam to shut up, he obliged, and shoved the tiny device into his pocket for safe keeping. Neither of them thought to turn it off first, because in their minds, and past experiences, it always stays turned on in the field. Excluding the moments when people turn them off in acts of defiance. 

About a mile later, both men heard a small rustling to their right. In hindsight, it was probably just a rabbit, but Sam suggested he go check it out, just in case. That’s what led to the two splitting up, but Bucky wasn’t worried. He knew that if there was a problem, Sam would’ve made it clear immediately. He also knew that Sam knew his way to the base all on his own. 

Bucky arrived at his location at the same time that Steve’s voice buzzed in his ear. At this point, the extra signal was long forgotten. 

“We’re in position.” Steve’s voice rattled. 

“10-4.” Bucky responded. 

“Alright, going dark now. Turn off your comms, let’s go.” 

Steve’s voice was followed by the soft beep of Bucky’s signal as he turned it off. 

He didn’t realize Sam’s signal was still active in his pocket.

“It was just bad luck dude, don’t feel too bad. I should’ve turned it off before I gave it to you, and I shouldn’t have assumed you’d turn it off yourself.” Sam tried to hide his pity with a half-smile.

“I–I was the leak?” Bucky whispered right as the wind started to calm again. He stared at the small device as Sam hid it in the pocket of his own coat. If only Sam had worn that on the way to the base.

“Yeah,” Sam said at a normal level now that the noise had nearly ceased, “but everyone’s safe now, that’s all that matters.” Sam reassuringly pat Bucky’s shoulder twice before looking back at Steve helping Y/N into the chopper.

Bucky let out a short hum, and focused on the ground. He wanted to crush that stupid little signal. He hated the way it made his chest feel tight, and his heart heavy with guilt. 

Sam’s voice interrupted Bucky’s thoughts.

“Those are a lot of goats, man.”

Before Bucky could respond, Steve appeared in front of them.

“Hey Buck,” Steve smiled, pulling him in for a quick hug, “I’m glad we found you so fast. Are you injured at all?” Steve pulled back to examine Bucky’s form.

“No, I’m fine,” Bucky swiftly assured, before feeling the throbbing of guilt consume him again, “but Y/N’s wrist is broken.”

“Don’t worry, I know. I already told her I’d take her straight to medical once we get back. Speaking of, we should get going.”

“Right.” 

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Three hours later, the group made it back to New York. As the ramp lowered, Bucky quietly pulled Steve aside.

“I can walk Y/N to med.” He nodded to where she was sitting, staring off into space.

“You sure?” Steve struggled to hide the surprise in his voice.

“Yeah.” Bucky nodded.

“Okay.”

Bucky gave his friend a firm pat on the shoulder before sauntering toward Y/N, who remained in her seat.

“Come on, Y/N.” He held out his right hand, offering her to take it.

“Huh?” She blinked twice, and stared up at him, eyebrows scrunched.

“I’m walking you to med.” 

“Oh. Okay.” She paused for a moment before standing up. “So much for being stuck for months.”

“Yeah, I guess that calculation was a bit off.”

“I’m just glad we’re back home. And that you didn’t need to kill any goats.”

“I was going to leave Cheetoh alone.”

“I don’t know if I believe you.”

The rest of their walk was relatively short, but silent, until they reached the doors of Dr. Cho. Bucky didn’t get a chance to say goodbye, as Dr. Cho was given a heads up to Y/N’s injury, and already whisked her away.

Bucky rocked back and forth on the balls of his feet for a minute, until he decided it would be uncomfortable for all parties involved if he stayed. He knew she’d be alright, he convinced himself, so there was no need to be in the way.

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A couple of the Avengers found themselves mentally recovering in the lounge, waiting for Y/N to get out of her evaluation.

“She’ll probably be out for two months. Broken wrist and all that.” Steve relayed, taking a seat on the couch.

“Two months?” Sam repeated, looking up from his bag of chips.

“I think she’s pretty bummed, so try not to mention it.”

As if on cue, Y/N entered the room.

“Hey guys,” she smiled, waving with the arm that wasn’t in a cast.

“Hey Hon. How’s the wrist?”

“Really, Tony?” Natasha glared at him.

“What?” He feigned innocence, throwing his hands in the air.

“It’s fine guys. It doesn’t hurt that bad, I’m more embarrassed than anything.” 

“Embarrassed by what? I think that cast makes you look tough.” Sam added, doing his best to cheer others up as always. “And hey, you and Bucky can be twins now.”

“Yeah, kinda. Look at that Buck!” She lifted her left arm in the direction of Bucky, who had been silently brooding in the corner. The bulk could be seen under the fabric of her hoodie, but she felt the need to emphasize the point by taking the pullover off.

She first tried tugging the sleeve off her cast, but it was a bit too snug. After a couple more moments of failing, she switched tactics to just pulling off the hoodie from over her head, but that got her stuck in an awkward position too.

After a second too long of borderline uncomfortable silence and shuffling, Steve spoke up.

“Do you want help with that?”

“Nope, I got it. Just gimme- a second…” 

Somehow she had gotten the garment twisted around her right arm and upper body.

“Hon, just let us-” Tony started, but was quickly cut off.

“You know what? It’s suddenly cold again. There’s a weird draft over here.” Y/N quickly tugged the hoodie back down and gave a weary smile. “I’m going to go to my room.”

She ran off before anyone could offer an opinion. Unsurprisingly, Steve was the first to speak.

“I’m going to go check on her.”

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A soft knock came to her door.

“Come in.”

“Hey, Y/N.” Steve gave a sympathetic smile as he gently closed the door behind him.

“Hi Steve, what’s up?” She looked fine, but he could hear the strain in her voice.

“Nothing, I just wanted to make sure you were alright.” He stood in front of where she sat at the edge of the bed.

“Yeah, I’m fine. I just got a little frustrated, it’s no big deal.” She shrugged it off, avoiding his eye line.

“It’s okay to feel frustrated.” 

“I know. I shouldn’t though. It’s my fault, anyways.”

“How so?”

She cast her gaze to the floor and swept a hand through her hair.

“Well, I think the whole reason we were ambushed was because of me.”

“What? Why would you say that?”

She took a deep breath.

“After Bucky and I got stranded after the attack, I was sure it wasn’t my fault. But then he started saying things, and they were mean… but he was also right. I started second guessing myself, and I thought about it. I mean, out of all of us, I’m the newest. And I was so sure that I turned my signal off…but now I don’t know. I can’t remember. And if it really is my fault they found us, then it’s my fault that fight happened, and it’s my own doing that this—” she pointed to her cast, “happened. I just feel stupid.”

“You weren’t the leak, Y/N.”

“What?”

“It was an accident. Bucky was carrying an extra signal, and no one thought to turn it off.”

“Bucky?” She looked bewildered, shaking her head at this fact.

“Yes.”

“Does he know?”

“Um…I’m not sure. I didn’t tell him. We never had a proper briefing after the chaos derailed our schedule when we got back.”

“I have to go find him.” Her shock turned to a quiet determination of which Steve decided not to push her on.

“Y/N?”

“Yeah?”

“Do you still want your hoodie off?”

“Yes please.”

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“Buck, wait up!”

Bucky slowed his jog around the track to a stop when he heard her voice.

“Y/N?”

“Hey.” She gave him a sweet smile once she caught up, one he felt undeserving of.

“Is there something you need?” 

“No. I just had to tell you something.”

“I’m listening.” He nodded, crossing his arms. He didn’t mean it in a defensive way, it just happened.

“First of all, you should know it’s not your fault.”

“What?” 

“I just found out how we got ambushed, and I figured I should tell you.”

“Oh.” He fought the urge to look away.

“Sam gave you his signal, right? But it was never turned off. It was just an accident. But I needed to tell you, because I know you’re going to blame yourself when they tell everyone at the briefing.” Her concerned tone and eyes met him for the briefest second before he wiped his hands down his face.

“I feel like an asshole.”

“No, please don’t.” She softly touched his elbow.

“I’m going to be honest Y/N, I thought you were going to take it a lot worse.”

“What do you mean?”

“When you found out that it was me. I was worried you were going to get really mad.”

“Wait, you already knew?”

“Yeah? Sam told me right when he found us…I thought you knew I knew, isn’t that why you just told me all that?”

“I thought you didn’t know. I wanted to be the one to tell you before the briefing, to tell you not to worry about it, because I knew you’d take it hard. But–but you already knew?”

Bucky just stared, jaw dropped at a loss for words.

“And–” She scoffed, “—and you didn’t tell me?!”

“Y/N, I-” 

“Don’t ‘Y/N’, me! You—you, jerk! I can’t believe you knew all this time that you were the leak, and after belittling me and convincing me it was my fault, you didn’t tell me the truth!” She laughed in disbelief. “You selfish, cold-hearted, dickhead!”

He wasn’t sure what to say, but it didn’t matter, because she kept going.

“I’m stuck off missions for the next two months with a broken wrist, and you let me think it was my own doing! You made me feel like an idiot!”

“I was going to tell you—”

“When? After I was already told at the meeting? I can’t believe you!” She turned around briefly as if she couldn’t even face him, but quickly turned back. “To think I felt bad for you when I found out it was you who got us ambushed!”

With each insult she managed to get a little closer to him. So close, in fact, that Bucky was struggling to even comprehend what she was saying anymore. All he could think of was how close he was to her, how his hands were just itching to grab her waist. His head was nearly empty when he finally did carefully grab her and pull her closer to him. She paused her rampage to look up into his adoring eyes at his sudden movement.

“Bucky?” She whispered, a swirl of confusion and intrigue.

He replied by placing his lips gently on hers, feeling the warmth of her touch. She reciprocated, kissing him back for a couple seconds before bringing her hands to his chest to furiously push him away, followed by a swift slap to the face.

“Jeez-” The sudden change from bliss to reality was shocking.

“I can’t believe you James!” She yelled, her flustered look from both the kiss and her rage. “I can’t believe you just kissed me! I have a right to be angry, fuck you for thinking you can shut me up by locking my lips!”

‘Shit, I messed up,” he starts to think, about to spew apologies, when he gets cut off by her grasping his hoodie in her hand and pulling him back in for another kiss. The moment his shock subsides and he sinks back into the waves of her kiss, he’s just as abruptly taken from it, head dizzy as she parts from him just to slap him across the cheek again.

“Ow! What was that for?” He brings his hand to the sting. He’s so dazed and confused, a hurricane of thoughts and emotions all fighting for his attention.

“You make me so mad! I’m fuming right now! You are so selfish—”

She cuts herself off, pulling him in for another kiss, one that he’s still not prepared for. His frustration rising at her antics, he brings both hands to either side of her face and holds her steadily against him, resulting in their first kiss that lasted longer than five seconds. When he finally feels her about to let go for breath, he lets his lips leave hers, and continues to cradle her head, their foreheads resting against each other as they both gasp for breath. 

“You’re not going to slap me again, are you?” He carefully asks, looking into her eyes.

“No.” 

“You’re sure?”

“No.”

He laughs and slowly lets go of her.

“You okay?”

After a few seconds of silence, she responds with hurt. “Why didn’t you tell me?” 

“I’ve already given you enough reason to hate me, I was sure that if you found out I was the leak, you’d finally hate me for good.”

“I don’t hate you Bucky. I always figured you kind of hated me. Lately you’ve been acting kind of like-”

“A dick, I know,” he nods. “And I’m sorry for that. Really, I am. It’s just-” Bucky’s voice seizes as she sees him look intensely at her mouth.

“It’s what?”

“Can I please kiss you again?”

She slowly nods, and allows Bucky to kiss her for the fourth time. It was fucking heaven to him. Regardless, he abruptly pulls back when a thought crosses his mind.

“Shit, what about Steve?”

“What about Steve?”

“Don’t you like each other?” 

She couldn’t help but think his concern was cute, the way he acted like he was talking about middle school crushes.

“Bucky, no,” she laughs, “Steve and I have just always been really good friends. You know, when people are nice to each other, and they like to hang around each other?”

“I just always thought that-”

“Never. He’s my friend. And I can guarantee you he feels the same as me.”

She lets him process the information, watching him nod to himself as if taking it in.

“Oh.”

“Are you jealous?” She smirks, giving him a flirty shove.

His cheeks go pink as he starts to stutter.

“Jea- jealous? No, not jealous. Just-”

Was he jealous? Was it emasculating to admit it? It doesn’t matter, he doesn’t care, he’s sick of lying.

“Okay, maybe I was a little bit jealous.” He mumbled, drawing his attention to a pebble on the ground that he was toeing. “So, you do like me, right?” 

She lifts his chin upwards and gives him the softest, sweetest, slowest peck. 

“Does that answer your question?” She flutters.

“I think so. But the slapping earlier was a bit confusing.” He teased.

“Sorry about that.”

“It’s alright, it was well deserved.”

“No, I still shouldn’t have hit you.” She said with certainty. “But I am still a little bit upset that you didn’t tell me.”

“Doll, I know I should’ve told you that you weren’t the leak. I wish–”

“No,” she shakes her head, “I’m upset you never told me how you felt about me. Instead you acted-”

“Like a dick, I know–”

“No, I was going to say like a child. But yeah, a dick, too.”

They just stood together for that moment, appreciating the start of something new. New, and beautiful, with a lot less animosity, and a lot more kisses.

A/N: If you’ve made it this far, thank you, thank you, thank you! I hope you liked it. If you feel like it, please lemme know your thoughts! I hope you have a peaceful day/night 💕

#bucky x f!reader #bucky barnes x reader #Bucky fic #bucky fanfic #bucky x reader #bucky x y/n #bucky x you #bucky angst #bucky barnes fanfiction

[floshav]

more rodrick PLSSSSS it can be anything

omg this is my first req ever and im so excited thank you!!

you wanted more Rodrick well here's more Rodrick.

part 2 out now!!

summary: Rodricks your best friend but thats not enough for you. As much as you hate to admit, you like the boy. That's why you show up drunk and high at one of his infamous house parties after he'd ranted to you about how he was so so in love with Heather Hills.

warnings: angst, heartache, kissing, Heather Hills, pining, weed, alcohol, crying, one sided love kinda, self hate

wc: 1k+

"She was so pretty."

"Oh yea?"

"No. I dont think you understand, like the way her hair smelled when she strut past me, the smell of..... smell of something light. Fresh! Pink even."

Rodrick practically had stars in his eyes when he described how his crush was at school. You'd be ecstatic if the crush was you, but the world is cruel so here you were talking about Heather Hills for the last hour or so.

"Y'know... I heard she spat on Louise last week. Poor kid, was dosed in her icky saliva for the whole day." Y/n was selfish but she tried to paint Heather in a bad light.

"Shit i'd pay good money for her to spit on me."

Well that backfired she thought.

"Freak" Y/n lightly laughed as she fell back onto Rodricks soft bed. Chest heaving up and down whilst her mind felt clouded.

"What can I say, love makes anyone a freak."

There was that word again. Love. How could he be bloody in love with little miss Heather Hills. The queen of highschool. The perfect girl. Pretty blondie. Pretty face. Y/n quickly began to realise there were plenty of reasons for Rodrick to crush on her. Y/n was a nobody. She thought her face ugly, her style wack, her eyes too uneven. She hated, hated, hated herself and wished she looked like Heather.

"Oh. My. God. I just had the best fucking idea" Rodrick exclaimed with the dorkiest smile he could produce, each fine line below the thickness of his eyebrows seen under the dim lighting of his room.

"Hmm?" Y/n buzzed as she basked in the coolness of his sheets

"M'gonna throw a party" "Heather would definitely come, i mean its one of my parties we're talking about."

Flashbacks to Rodrick's last party hit y/n's head like a train when she remembered how chaotic and horrible the experience was. Drunk teens shouting and chugging unknown beverages, shoulders brushing against shoulders constantly as she tried to find a room she could breath in without having to see another damn couple absolutely devouring eachother. Each and every minuscule second she'd spent in that house made her want to puke. The sight that made her want to puke the most was Rodrick's clearly drunk self throwing himself onto Heather, eyes sparkly with hope whilst she just sat there smiling so sweetly it was sickening.

Quickly she was sent back to reality.

"D'you think that's a good idea?" she questioned, tired.

"Course it is! she always comes to my things"

"Kay' whatever you think is gonna earn you your little dream girl specimen."

"Trust me, this times different." That's what he always said.

--------------------------------------

It's ok. It's ok. I-It's.... it's gonna be fine. she told herself as she admired the makeup she'd put on for tonight's occasion, she'd tried to copy one of Heathers famous looks, but quickly realised it didn't suit her skin so she stuck to her usual and hated herself for it. It was dreadfully the day of his party. The day that she'd have to witness him openly flirt with Heather just because he had an excuse to down a dozen bottles of cheap booze. She swiped a smear of lipstick that somehow ended up below her lip and sighed as she adjusted her shirt. Why do you always give in? Just confess you idiot. No! what the fuck am i thinking. she scrunched her nose and took a deep breath in, abusing her vanity with the pressure from the pads of her fingers.

She really really didn't want to go. She couldn't bare seeing Heather show up with her annoyingly perfect face, her perfect nose, her perfect hair, her stupidly sweet personality that everyone gaped over. Fuck it. She hated herself and wanted to forget that Rodrick even existed.

She found her not so hidden stash of weed she'd carelessly left under a pile of worksheets from her chemistry class, something ionic bonding. She didn't know how long it'd sat there for but it stained the ziplock bag a dull yellow. The bag was crinkled and smelled like the thought of Rodrick. Whenever she was upset or mad at Rodrick she'd smoke weed to drown the thoughts out but she slowly realised it was ruining the drug as a whole for her.

She rolled a joint in a random piece of paper she'd found thrown on her floor and lit up the end, taking a deep whiff of it, smile playing on her lips.

-----------------------------

"Animals.....Elephants....Tiguurrrsssss!" She slurred as she laid flat on her disheveled bed scrunching the sheets as her eyes formed stars around her ceiling. She got up abruptly, hair a mess and rubbed her eyes deepening the pressure with every second. "Rrrr... What time? Uggggh" She sighed as she reached for her phone. Her room was cloudy and smelled of green. Beside her were a few empty glasses so she took a sniff, curious. Happy juice? No, Vodka she thought. She saw the emptied out bottle of cheap convenience store alcohol by the side of her feet a long with the yellowed bag of weed which was empty. it'd been around 2 hours since she blacked out on her bed somehow thinking about how her fan looked like the shape of animals. Shit, fuck, ass, asshole! she muttered under her breath as she plopped back down.

"Why not? What's thurrr worst that could happennn?" she mumbled eyes fluttering as she picked up her bag and stumbled out her window, careful not to wake anyone. She took the route down the tree that always worked for her but in a clumsy fashion as she fumbled down the hard branches of her overgrown escape buddy. Craaack, Creeeeak. The continuous sounds made her annoyed. "Uggggfh can't everyone just shut up!!"

--------------------------------------

There she was. Standing dumb, drunk and high in front of the booming house lit up by warm yellow light. She could already smell the familiar smell of cheap alcohol, body odour and weed. My kind of night she thought as she barely made her way to the entrance. There were already people outside partying like no tomorrow as some flipped their hair to some overplayed hip hop song that everyone knew. While some were more restricted, sipping on booze as they giggled with their friends. The true highschool experience y/n thought.

Bump.

"Hey! Watch it-"

"Y/n?"

It was someone with beautiful waves of blonde still visible from her clouded vision, pretty makeup and a perfect body. Heather.

"O-Oh hey Heather! Pretty little Heather Hills." Y/n slurred as her vision was still blurred

"Uhm... Y'alright?" She questioned looking back at her friends as if y/n was cuckoo.

"No. No. No. No! Y-you. You. You and your stupidly perfect self can go to hell!" y/n lashed out

"W-what? Y/n what the fuck is wrong with you?" Heather said clearly freaked out by the sudden aggression.

Tears started to cloud y/n's vision so she took in a deeeeep breath trying to suck in as much oxygen as she could.

"Fuck you. Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you! You- You're all he wants. Heather, heather, heather! My perfect little heather with her pretty little face!" Y/n cried out as her knees began to weaken. She had no sense of shame, embarrassment or anxiety. She was too blacked out for this. So blacked out she just blurted her deepest darkest thoughts.

A crowd began to form around them, some curious at the sudden shouting girl who was crumbling a part, vulnerable in front of some people she didn't even know the names of.

"W-what? What are you even saying y/n." Heather said confused and disturbed as she began to back away.

Warmth began to spread at the small of y/n's back. Rodricks hand.

"Y/n? Why the fuck are you screaming?- Y/n s-shit you're not alright." Rodrick hastily slung y/n's arm around his shoulder careful with her as if she was a piece of fine china.

"S-sorry bout' that Heaths, trust me she doesn't mean anything she's saying" Rodrick stutters clearly not drunk enough, nervous as he realises that Heather is clearly agitated.

"Y-yea. It's okay Rodrick. It's not your fault, just get her far from here kay?" Heather said with sympathy and those stupid doe eyes whilst placing a hand on his shoulder. This should've made him tremble with pleasure, but the fact that she'd talked about y/n as if she was a monster made him angry.

"Yea. Yea alright." Rodrick scoffed, lightly rolling his eyes before dragging y/n's blacked out figure up his carpeted staircase, the carpet grazing her knees creating a friction which burned satisfyingly on her kneecaps.

"Fuuuck. Fuck..." Y/n softly mumbled, head tilting to the side of his shoulder as he firmed his grip on the side of her shoulder. Shoulders.... shoulders are for friends, real girls get hands put on their waist. Not shoulders. She managed to conjure the thought in her hazed mind.

He struggled to open his door as y/n's body weight pressed into the side of him as he suddenly heard silent weeps of sorrow erupt from her lips.

He set her on the foot of his bed, careful not to drop her anywhere harsh.

"Y/n? Y/n what's wrong, you're like black out drunk." He asked now bending down with both hands on his knees.

He slowly caresses his hand over the hill of her cheekbone and shoves a fly of hair away from her puffy eyes.

"You....i... Im sick of you and- and her." She sighs as a hysterical tear falls from her eye. Her face was the saddest Rodrick had ever seen and this broke his heart.

"Me and... me and who y/n?" He said so softly as he began to crouch so so close to her, his eyes looking up into hers with genuine curiosity and care. The mention of her name fluttered her heart.

"Heather" She breathed out involuntarily sniffling.

"You don't like me talking about her?" He slowly asked as if all the dots were finally clicking together.

"That's a stupid question." He lowly chuckled as he swiped his thumb under the pad of her eyes.

"I.. I really- I really"

"You really what?" He said again so so softly

"I really like you." She blurted before she felt that familiar rush of heat rapture her face.

Rodrick's eyes glance down to her swollen lips and he feels a strong ache pill at his heart. His best friend just confessed about her underlaying fondness of him and he'd been an ass talking about Heather all the time. He imagined how bad it must've sucked all the damn time.

"I-I'm so sorry I- I always talked about her."

"No! don't fucking be sorry you idiotttt." She slurred

"You- You don't owe me anything." She smiled softly as she fluffed up his hair.

"Maybe..." This is wrong he thought

"Maybe i do owe you an apology." He said slow and steady as he glanced down to her lips and locked with it for the final time.

He slowly moved in to plant a soft kiss on her puffy lips and her eyes widened in surprise.

The kiss felt like heaven and she tasted like everything he was used to. A hint of cherry chapstick, a lot of weed and something coconut. His lips felt so soft against hers and she breathed in every second of the experience. She almost wanted to whine when he pulled away.

"I- Fuck."

Y/n's euphoric high was quickly ruined at the notice of him clearly regretting his decision.

"No- It's fine Rodrick. I get it, it was just a in the moment thing." She sighed as she put both her hands to her face rubbing her cheeks and eyes as if she was trying to rid off the pain in her heart.

"No, no, no! it's not that."

"I just..."

"Fuck it." He went in for another kiss.

--------------------------(end)

thank u for the request!! i hope this was enough to satisfy ur rodrick need lol, if u ever want a smutty end to this lmk but yarrrrr

#rodrick heffley #doawk rodrick #rodrick x y/n #rodrick x fem!reader #rodrick #rodrick x reader #diary of a wimpy kid rodrick #rodrick imagines #rodrick fanfic #rodrick heffley x reader #rodrick heffley x fem reader #rodrick fanfiction #rodrick heffley fanfiction

[taintandviolent]

Ride ; Jimmy Darling x Reader

summary: 7k words. Jimmy tries to get you and your friend to ride the carousel, but she swoops in with the cock block of the century. Jimmy takes it real hard, but maybe... maybe you can change that by the end of the night. aka: a little angst, a little fluff, and a whole lotta smut that centers around a carousel. w a r n i n g s: female reader, female receiving, angst, mild fluff, kinda slow burn, fingering, unprotected sex, public sex, rough sex. a/n: I have a problem... I've always wondered what it would be like to fool around on a carousel, and who better to explore that idea with than Jimmy Darling??? be fr. he's the one who would do it. comments are appreciated! full fic & taglist under cut!↓ / ao3 link here! / ♪ recommended playlist here! ♪

It was a beautiful day, really. The sun was out, the sky held big, white clouds as fluffy as the cotton candy in your hand, and by grace of whatever God, the bugs had decided to stay away. The fabric of the tents fluttered, making snapping sounds every time the breeze caught it. 

Your bag swung at your side as you two walked through the field, passing the main tent. You’d wanted to see the Freak Show, but Debbie resisted, claiming that it wasn’t “good for us to see God’s mistakes” which you thought was a horrible and cruel thing to say, especially since you’d been teased in school for being so flexible. Some people’s bodies were just… different.

“I wonder how some of them eat.” Debbie sneered, bringing wretched images to mind. Although you hadn’t paid for the Freak Show, the posters of all the… talent… told you enough. Debbie expected a response, but you said nothing, feeling like the way you ate cotton candy was a privilege. You knew it was, and knew not to take it for granted.

“Carousel rides!” 

You snapped your head to the left, searching for the source. 

The man standing on a wooden crate outside of the operator booth proudly shouted the words over and over again. Children tugged on their mother’s dresses, pointing. Many of them were towed away with a frown, but a special few were treated, their mothers pulling change from their handbags as they approached him. For the most part though, throngs of people passed him, ignoring him. They’d come for the Freak Show, and didn’t want something as normal as a carousel. He’d grabbed your attention with his boisterous voice, and as soon as you two made eye contact, he took that as willing prey. Sure, you understood why; two girls, all by themselves enjoying a casual day at the Freak Show… “Just a nickel for the ride of your life!” 

“Ladies!” He stepped down off the box, making a beeline for you. Your friend immediately stiffened and started tugging you away, but you stood fast. He was handsome enough - you’d at least give him the time of day to do his little pitch. With an annoyed huff, Debbie crossed her arms across her chest, rolling her eyes skyward. 

“Care for a ride on the carousel? Let the pretty horses carry you for a few minutes, huh?” He crooned. 

Debbie laughed haughtily, shaking her head. You pinched off another piece of cotton candy before laying it carefully on your tongue. As the sticky sugar dissolved, you kept your eyes on the man, smiling a coy, come-hither smile. Finally, you swallowed and spoke again. “I used all my money on the Ferris Wheel. You’re awful cute though.” 

He grinned boyishly, leaning closer to you. He reached forward, carefully curling his fused fingers in, so as not to scare you as they neared your face. To him, hiding his fingers was a force of habit. You seemed like you might not have cared… but the risk was too great. With a soft, warm smile, the Lobster boy dragged his thumb across the corner of your mouth, removing a small fluff of cotton candy from the corner. 

“Y’think so?” 

You nodded, your soft curls bouncing with the motion.

“Well, in that case, baby, it’s free of charge for pretty girls.” 

“Oh, I doubt that’s true.” You cooed, leaning forward towards him. Surely that would get him in trouble with the big boss later. He glanced at your lips briefly before answering, and that sent a wave of undulating heat through your core. You couldn’t help but feel special at the mention of ‘baby’ even though you were certain that he called at least fifty girls a day the same thing and more. Despite all his lavish flirting, Debbie remained unmoved. In fact, a nasty scowl had developed on her once standardly pretty features.

“C’mon, you can’t tell me you’re gonna turn down a free ride on a carousel now, are ya?” 

Debbie yanked your arm again, pursing her lips. “She sure is - get lost, freak.” 

Immediately, his debonair expression morphed into something much less friendly. Under a furrowed brow, his dark eyes narrowed into slits, darkening his once-amorous gaze. His jaw clenched, nostrils flaring with anger. As you were towed away, you tried to throw him an apologetic frown, but he’d already turned away to kick the wooden crate he’d been standing on far into the field. 

Eve was making her rounds, checking in on everyone as she usually did. For not having any children herself, she had one hell of a maternal streak in her. Her and Ethel both looked after the troupe like they were their own, and that meant making sure that everyone was holding up throughout the day before they had to be corralled for the show. Jimmy had been assigned carousel duty that day, a position he usually shone in. His chipper attitude and undeniable charm brought the crowds, but when she walked up on the carousel, she could tell that Jimmy’s mood had soured. Over what, God knows, but she intended to find out. 

A soft hand came down on Jimmy’s shoulder. “What’s going on, sweetheart? What’s that face for?”

“It just ain’t right, Eve. These gals, they’re so pretty… and they’re full of coyote piss. Worst manners I’ve ever seen.” 

“I know, but you can’t let ‘em get to you. You know they’re gonna’ say something, sweetheart. It’s the same in every city, Jimmy… there’s always at least two that have nothing nicer to say. Like your mama’ always tells you, it says more about them than it does you.”

Jimmy knew she was right. He knew every single word that ever came out of her cherry-coloured lips was always right. Strong and wise — that was Eve. So why had those two particular girls gotten under his skin so much? He knew why. Underneath all the bitterness, he knew it was because you had been the prettiest girl he’d seen in this city — maybe in a few cities —  and that made the cruelty cut a little deeper. Sure, your friend had been the one to make the comment, but you hadn’t taken him up on his offer and you sure as hell hadn’t stopped her — which had to mean that somewhere, deep down, you agreed with her. 

Antsy, Jimmy rubbed the back of his neck before craning it to look up at Eve. He offered her an appreciative smile, assuring her that he’d be fine in a few, just needed a bit to cool off. So far, she wasn’t buying it. 

“It’s ‘cause she was pretty, wasn’t it? You always get so hung up on the pretty ones.” 

That was another thing — nothing got past her. 

Your breaths rushed out in tired pants as you ran through the field, clutching your purse to your side. You’d ditched the cotton candy in a bin so you could run freely. Arguably, telling Debbie that she needed to get head on straight might not have been one of the best decisions you’d made this summer. Debbie was your ride home, and that had hammered in that you’d have to walk to the nearest store and ask to use their phone if you wanted to make it home that night. What she’d done just didn’t sit right with you… and you were going to make it right. Besides that, if the rose-tinted fantasy you’d created in your head went as planned, you might have one of the best nights of your life. 

You were completely out of breath by the time you got to the carousel, but he was still there, holding the gate open for a group of teenagers as they scurried out like little mice. A very tall woman stood next to him, hands on her hips. She turned to you first, and quirked a single brow. 

“Hi,” you breathed. “I wanted to ride the carousel. And um, talk to him.” You jabbed your finger through the air, pointing at the Lobster Boy. 

“Well, I don’t know about our boy Jimmy, but the carousel is a nickel, honey.” 

You stared for a moment, processing what she’d said. You stuck your hand in your purse, fishing hurriedly around, praying to God that a stray nickel would be nestled in the crevices. After breathily apologising several times in the awkward silence, you finally produced a silver coin, holding it out in your hand, proudly. Before the tall lady could take it, two conjoined digits laid atop your palm, pushing it downwards.

“Carousel’s closed. Lunch break.” 

Now or never. “No, wait… please. Listen, I’m sorry about my friend. She… can be such a—” 

“Oh, you mean callin’ me a freak?” He asked. 

You recoiled, the bite in his words was harsher than you’d prepped yourself for. You swallowed, and straightened up, mustering up the courage to continue. 

“Look, Mr. Darling, I really —”

“Oh, we care about names now, huh?” 

He was really bent out of shape over this. You took a deep breath, pressing on. “I really did think you’re cute, and I would’ve ridden the carousel right then. I’m sorry that my friend said what she said. She had no right and I don’t have any right coming back here, but… I just… I had to apologise.”

He seemed to consider your words. You thought you saw a flicker of something in those deep, black coffee eyes of his but his expression remained stony, his arms stayed tight across his chest. The woman next to him shifted, nudging him slightly. You cleared your throat, trying to find the confidence to continue presenting your case, but the nerves took hold. The two of them remained impassive, unwilling to see past your friend’s heinous attitude, and you could hardly blame them.

With a small, courteous bow, you turned harshly, cutting yourself off. Any words that came from your mouth were going to be downright foolish, so you marched away from the pair, leaving a frustrated cloud of dust behind you. You thought you heard the woman call back to you, but you ignored her, not wanting any other bruises on your ego. 

Thankfully, by the time you’d made it to the outskirts of the main field, Debbie hadn’t left. After some sappy apologies, some agreements that that guy was a jerk, and a promise that you’d buy her soda at the diner, she agreed to stay friends. She thought you were a lunatic for even considering him, especially with those hands he had. You offered to buy her some sweets at the store too, and with a penchant for candy, she agreed and threw the car into drive. It was her father’s car, but she sure didn’t act like it. 

The store wasn’t far, but it felt like an eternity with the way she reprimanded you. Worse than your mother would. You rode in silence, sulking — as if it wasn’t bad enough that you’d been shot down out of your pink, cotton candy sky of delusions by Jimmy Darling. You almost opened the door before she’d stopped the car once you two had arrived.

As you stood in the candy aisle, you bounced on your heels. Debbie scoured the rows of jars for her preferred types, you began picked at your nails absentmindedly. It was inevitable that your thoughts drifted back to the red and white striped tents, to the wooden horses with graceful feathers atop their heads, and your mind conjured up the warm, sticky sweet scents of caramel and cotton candy. Jimmy Darling… your expression soured. For all you knew, you’d been blacklisted from ever seeing the show or setting foot on the fairgrounds. Anywhere.

“Alright, let’s go.” She barked, yanking you out of your stupor. Her arms were full of candy. Jeez, is she going to buy the whole store?!

On the way to the diner, you drove, because Debbie was far too invested in her candies to want to drive down the road a few miles. The diner was positioned just near the field, which was a terrific business decision on the owners of the Freak Show. From the vantage point of the tables outside, you could see the Freak Show in all its glory. The Ferris Wheel spun slowly. 

From where you sat, you could see the tip of the carousel, and for a brief moment, wondered if he was still there. Was he still calling to people? Had he found another pair of girls, both of them charmed to death by him? Was he guiding them to the horses with a wink? You hung your head, spinning the straw around in your glass, watching sadly as the soda bubbles rushed to the top.

“Well, look who it is.”

Your face fell, the last bit of colour draining from your face. You clocked his voice immediately. That drove a burning stake of embarrassment through your chest, sending you into a flurry of emotion. You turned sharply on the bench to face him. There he was, as handsome as ever, standing next to another man you recognised from the posters, the one who had the fire breathing act. Without thinking, you scowled at both of them.

“Can I help you?” Lips pursed into a tight, angry line. You were hurt more than anything, but you were putting on an extra show for Debbie. 

“I sure hope so. I can’t get your face outta’ my head, doll. It keeps —“ 

“Oh, we’re smitten now?” You mocked the way he spoke to you earlier. Your voice was sharp, biting, and a reflection of the cracks Jimmy had put in your heart. You felt it, he heard it. You were livid. Now he wanted to talk, now he wanted to give you a chance when a few hours ago, all you’d wanted was a chance to apologise, to make wrongs right and he couldn’t give you the time of day.

“Run back to your Freak Show, Jimmy Darling.”  

“Only if you’re coming back with me.” 

Debbie straightened up, mouthful of jellies. Even she, in her anti-freak state, couldn’t deny the charm the man held. Her eyes darted between the two of you, waiting to see who would fold first.

“Why should I? So you can humiliate me again? Make me apologise only to shuck me off as nothing again?” 

“You went and apologised!?” Debbie blared from behind you, her mouth sticky. 

“Hush up!” 

Jimmy smirked to his friend, who reciprocated the expression, clearly impressed by your sudden fieriness. 

“Huh? I asked you a question, Jimmy.” 

“Well, see…” he paused, clearing his throat. “I was just upset back there. But my friend here talked me down, and I—“ 

“Oh, how nice of him. Maybe I should’ve found him and asked him for a ride.” The words were accompanied by a sneer. The man next to Jimmy tucked his hands in the pockets of his jeans and smirked. It was a suave, dangerous smirk and you caught yourself; almost letting your eyes linger a little too long. As he closed the distance between you two, Jimmy cleared his throat again — a nervous habit. 

“Listen, doll face…” he muttered.

Debbie was waiting to see who would fold first… and it was going to be you, because when Jimmy Darling sat down next to you on the tiny little bench, and leaned his elbow on the table, your whole body felt like Jell-O. He smiled hopefully, staring into your eyes. Even Debbie stayed quiet then.

“C’mon… whaddya’ say? After the show tonight, say around… nine o’clock?” 

If it were possible, you would’ve told him no, but the way your gaze softened would’ve given you away. So, instead of lying to him, you took a deep breath and turned back, making brief, embarrassed eye contact with Debbie before returning your attention to your very interesting soda. 

Jimmy waited a few more moments, but finally got up without another word. His friend muttered something you couldn’t hear. You were proud of yourself and how resilient you were acting, because deep down, you wanted to run back to him, clutch him at the collar and beg for his attention again. But you didn’t, and he didn’t come back, just walked off down the dirt road with his friend, laughing and joking. Your only option now was go to see him at nine o’clock. 

Somehow, even though she was still sore, you convinced Debbie to see a movie after you finished your sodas, just to pass the time. You’d gone and apologised and made her look bad, so she was mad at you and made that known. As you munched on popcorn, you thought about lecturing her on her choice of words, but ultimately, decided against it — she was rooted in her ways and you in yours. The hours dragged and the movie was no help. You couldn’t even recall the plot as the images flashed before your eyes. Some romantic plot, but you were too busy thinking about your own plot with Jimmy Darling, the Lobster Boy. Too busy swimming in his deep, brown eyes and basking in his bright, poster-boy smile. You’d give it all just to see it again… just to see him look at you the way he had this afternoon. 

Eventually, the movie ended and it was just about eight-thirty — enough time to get to the field. Debbie may have been mad, but she still offered to drive. She swore up and down that she wouldn’t pick you up, however. That was alright, you mused. If you had your way, you wouldn’t need a ride home. 

About that time, Jimmy leaned against one of the horses. There was a part of him that was screaming that this was a waste of time and there wasn’t a chance in Hell that you were coming. Another part that was more gentle, softer, and more romantic whispered quietly in his ear that something in your eyes earlier today had begged for him to touch you, to hold you close to his chest and nuzzle his lips against your neck. Girls were funny creatures, but boy did he love ‘em. Even through all the tribulations and mood swings, Jimmy was obsessed with those long-legged, bright-eyed, pink-lipped girls. There was just something about them.

Given his unfortunate circumstances, Jimmy didn’t particularly see himself as a Casanova, but the reality of it was that he was every bit of that. In every city their caravans pulled into, Jimmy always found himself a handful of girls who would swoon over him, and another select one that was adventurous enough to be moaning his name by the end of the week. He was doing ‘em a service, giving them a taste of the wild side of loving. 

You approached from the opposite side of the meadow, passing quietly by the Ferris Wheel. Everything was abandoned, the circus-goers had long since left, leaving nothing but empty popcorn bags and heavily trodden grass. The main tent was alive with chatter though, full of people. You assumed Jimmy wasn’t in there, and when you craned your neck to look over, you saw a black woollen hat poking over the top of one of the horses.

“I’m here to ride…” you said quietly, approaching from behind. 

Jimmy spun around to the direction of your voice, a delighted smile on his face. He was thrilled — over the moon, in fact. In a flurry of excitement, he yanked his hat off his head and threw it to the ground before latching onto one of the twisted golden poles. With a small laugh, he swung himself off the carousel onto the grass, the blades folding underneath his weight. He rushed up to you, like he had earlier in the day, and immediately, his gaze locked onto your lips, glossy with some sort of lipstick that you’d put on just before showing up.

“I didn’t think you’d make it…” 

“I don’t think that’s true,” you said. “I think you knew very well that I would.” 

“Sure, maybe I did.” 

You gazed up into his pitch dark eyes with a smile. For such an inky set of hues, they sure were warm. He looked back down at you, tilting his head slightly. A love drunk, half-lidded look washed over his features and with a breath, you mirrored it. You rose to your tip-toes, biting the corner of your bottom lip. 

That was a look of wanting a kiss, and boy was he glad you’d given him the green light on that one. Jimmy placed his hands on your elbows before slowly sliding them up the backs of your arms. Once they reached your shoulders, he pulled you in closer. He lowered his head with a smile, and finally, your lips met in the softest, tenderest kiss you’d ever had in your life. “C’mon,” he said, breaking the kiss as he took your hand. “You came here for a ride, and I’m gonna’ give you one.”

With your smaller hand in his, Jimmy wasted no time in leading you to the carousel. After a little deliberation, you chose the tan horse with the beautiful, golden plume on its headdress, its head reared up in an enchanting whinny. You hoisted one leg over the horse’s wooden body, holding your skirt down in the middle to avoid flashing the man behind you. Once you were situated, Jimmy took hold of the worn leather strap at your waist, wrapping both arms around you to slip the prong into the size-appropriate hole. Both his large, vascular hands came down on either hip, giving you a gentle pat. 

“Gotta’ strap you down, in case this horse decides to take off.” Jimmy teased. He gave you a wink before stepping off the carousel and making the short trek to the operator’s booth. After he’d slipped inside, he flipped a switch and pushed forward on a lever. The music started first, breathy and light. Shortly after, the carousel gently came to life; the horses that were high dipped gracefully, and the ones that were low, rose ever so softly into the air, until they were all galloping in unison. 

You held on, delighted. Even though you were no longer a child, riding a carousel still held a certain joviality. The horses went up down as light as air, and you moved your body with their motions, stretching up and curving down as they circled around their track. You wondered where the rest of the troupe was. Surely, they’d heard the sweet, mellifluous sound of of the calliope as it drifted over the tall grasses and rode on the soft breeze, inviting anyone who heard it to come for a ride, come for a ride.

Jimmy stood just in front of the carousel, watching as you swept by, circling round and round. Every time you caught a glimpse, you blushed. You didn’t have to be a mind-reader to hear his thoughts; he was admiring the way your body seemed to course with energy, following the movements of the animal below you, and matching their gait. He figured you’d do that with him, too. God, I sure hope she does. 

The carousel was going slow enough that Jimmy could step on without injury, but even then, he was skilled enough to do it at a higher speed. He waited until the black horse passed and then quickly hopped on. He was several horses behind you, which meant that you’d be looking for him out in the field on the next rotation. And you were — he saw your neck lengthen as you looked for him, turning slightly as you passed the spot where he previously stood. Jimmy travelled from horse to horse, his hand flattening on the hard, wooden rumps of each of the horses as he passed them. As he approached, you were none the wiser, still giggling softly to yourself and swaying delicately to the music. 

“Havin’ fun?” He asked, laying his hand on the small of your back. Instead of lurching upwards in fright like he expected you to, you melted into his hand. With a sigh, you dropped your head to the side, thankful that it landed on his shoulder. You got a whiff of his warm aroma; he smelled like a carnival would, a perfume of popcorn, cotton candy, warm grasses and sun. You took a few deep breaths, calming your nerves. With the euphoria of the carousel, you were already so full of emotion. Now arousal? Just because he touched your back and you smelled him? Poor little fool. You weren’t sure you could handle another overwhelming sensation. 

“This is the most wonderful carousel I’ve ever ridden,” you confessed dreamily. “And I’ve ridden so many.” 

“This ol’ girl?” He asked. He stroked the horse next to you, fingers dancing lovingly over the tresses of the horse’s frozen mane. “Aw, shucks. She probably loves hearin’ that. She’s been with us since… hell, since before I’ve been apart of the show.” 

He looked up, watching as the oiled gears rotated, bringing you up and down. Him and Eve had repaired this thing a handful times, and his mother had even sculpted a new head for one of them. The white one, on the other side. Of course, she’d done such a good job that barely anyone noticed. There’d be a day where she’d break down so bad that they couldn’t fix her, but today wasn’t that day. 

You’d made quite a few rotations by that point, and the songs would start repeating sooner or later. He asked: “Had enough?”

“I could ride this all night, Jimmy. All night.” You replied. 

“How ‘bout you ride something else?” 

Your jaw dropped open, but Jimmy closed it with a knuckle. Immediately, he started to stammer nervously, unsure of what had come over him.“Gosh, I’m sorry, that was uh —

You cut him off with a kiss, pressing your lips into his warm, plush ones. You didn’t want to hear an apology. There had certainly been enough of that today. His hand cupped your knee, caressing it softly. The feeling took your breath away, leaving nothing but a quiet little whimper that vibrated against his lips.

Moving away from your knee, Jimmy’s hand trailed upwards until he met the thick fluffy petticoat of your dress and flipped it up, delving underneath before it fluttered back down. His thick fingers grazed your slit over your panties, feeling the heat that radiated from it. You weren’t sure if you’d already started leaking into the satin, but whatever Jimmy felt was enough for him to break the kiss and gaze deep into your eyes.

“Baby, baby… c’mere.” After freeing you, Jimmy hoisted you up into his arms wedding-style. Your arms wrapped around his neck, which you immediately took to kissing and nipping playfully at. His breath hitched when you did. Careful not to hit your feet on any of the horses, Jimmy navigated around each of the horses. He finally reached his destination, and set you carefully down on the swan chair, making sure you were comfortable before sinking into the spot next to you.

“I’m real glad you decided to come tonight.” He murmured, brushing a lock of hair away from your face. “I meant what I said about not bein’ able to get your face outta’ my head.” 

“Well, I meant what I said about you being awful cute.”

Jimmy hurriedly crawled on top of you, supporting his weight on the back of the chair. His head hung between his shoulders as he leaned down, bringing his face closer to yours, his warm breath washing over your cheeks. 

“I want you real bad,” he slurred. You picked up the faintest hint of alcohol on his breath, biting and strong. “I need that heat, baby.” 

The fabric of his dark jeans were pulled taut with his growing arousal, and when you hooked your fingers around the top of his belt, your fingers grazed the warm skin of his tummy. He whimpered as you tugged him closer, urging his hips into yours. You wanted it, batting your lashes with wanton intent. God, he thought. I could fall head first into those doe-eyes if I’m not careful…

Slowly, Jimmy began grinding into you, bringing himself as close as he could with clothes on. You were so soft and warm underneath him. It drove him crazy. You whimpered pitifully, closing your eyes and melting into his touch. One of his hands was on the back of the chair while the other was beneath your ass, pulling you up to meet each of his thrusts. 

“Harder, Jimmy.” was all you said.

Jimmy thrusted deeper, rolling his hips back and forth and grinding against your centre. The hardness beneath his jeans bumped against you, rubbing determinedly against your cunt. The friction was just enough to get him stiffer, but not enough to satisfy. Like a lover persisting that something was too much, the wood creaked louder. Jimmy slowed his grinding, looking up at the old neck of the swan. “We oughta’ move this somewhere else… I dunno’ if she can handle…” 

“Handle what?” You asked, out of breath and distraught that he’d stopped. The tiniest beads of sweat decorated your hairline. Jimmy had you worked up and only from some heavy grinding. 

“Well, to be honest doll face, what I wanna’ do to ya’.” 

Your cheeks flushed, hotter than the surface of the sun. They had to be beet-red as your eyelashes fluttered shyly at him. “Jimmy…” you whispered. He grinned, and took a few steps back, extending his hand towards you. Your curious eyes trailed down, sweeping over the bulge in his jeans. You weren’t the only one who had gotten worked up, it seemed.

You took his hand and he pulled you off the swan seat with ease, his bicep flexing underneath the cuff of his sleeve. As he led you off the carousel, your hand was swallowed by warmth and size. The journey was short, but the reason for the destination was obvious; it was secluded and out of view. Behind the carousel, between two smaller tents, the grasses were high, swaying back and forth with the breeze. Jimmy sat down first, pulling you down onto his lap.

You needed no instruction from the man beneath you; your hips began grinding back and forth on his groin, picking up where you two left off. He groaned and fell onto his back, weakened with pleasure. You could see his skin flushing with arousal. A smile curled around your lips, feeling more powerful than you could ever remember. Jimmy was beneath you, panting in ecstasy, and all you had to do was wiggle your hips back and forth to make him come undone. You bit your lip, planting your hips hard, and shimmied back and forth, feeling his bulge grind against your swollen clit. Jimmy practically whined at that. It was a high pitched, desperate, breathy sound.

“Baby…” He leaned up, his chest heaving. “You’re drivin’ me wild.” 

You nodded, knowingly. It wasn’t a secret that you were driving yourself wild; you were certain that by this point, you’d left a sizeable wet spot on his jeans. Your hands moved to his chest, taking your time with his shirt as you carefully pulled each button out of its slit. Once they were undone, you pushed the shirt off his round shoulders, letting it fall to the grass below. Jimmy watched you intently. 

“Where’s my strap now?” You asked, tracing circles on his bare chest. His skin was tanned and warm, like it had taken the warmth of the summer sun, absorbed it and made it its own. You leaned down, pressing a soft kiss on the flesh just above his nipple. Jimmy hissed in response, lifting his head to look at you. 

He looked at you curiously, a single eye brow lifted. “Your what?” 

“My leather safety strap… you know, in case this Lobster takes off…” 

“Ohoh,” Jimmy laughed a low, sweet molasses-like chuckle. “Oh, baby. He will. But don’t you worry, I’ll hold onto you nice n’ tight.” 

You pressed your lips against his, humming an excited laugh into his mouth. Feeling adventurous, you reached down the front of his jeans. Right away, the tips of your fingers were met with a velvety hot tip, slick with pre-cum. You swept the pad of your thumb over the slit, smearing the clear fluid over the tip. His heavy, swollen cock was already sensitive from the grinding that you two had been doing, so the slightest touch had him bucking his hips into your palm. The motion pushed your hand farther down into his jeans, allowing you to feel his stiff cock, and the heat that radiated from it. 

“Jimmy,” you cooed. “You’re so hard…” 

“Well, ‘course I am baby… you think you can move those hips on a guy like that and nothin’ happens?” As he spoke, Jimmy’s long, conjoined fingers gripped your hips, urging them back and forth again as if you to remind you what you’d been doing. Your body obeyed, undulating back and forth, riding the base of his cock, while your hand stroked just below the tip.

“Fuck,” he moaned. “Fuck, baby, just like that…” 

You kept up, easing more pre-cum from Jimmy’s tip. Your blush had spread to your neck, a direct result of you being embarrassed by your provocativeness. You’d never been this dirty in your life, and your first sexual encounter had been far less licentious than this — but it all felt so natural with him. 

“Ahhh, alright — I’m gonna’ lose it, baby. You gotta’ stop…” He said, abruptly yanking your hand from his jeans. 

“Well, what’s wrong with that?” 

“What’s wrong with that?” He echoed, pausing to kiss you. “What’s wrong with that is…” Another kiss. “I want inside uh’ you…” Another kiss, and he looked down at your body, watching as your chest heaved with each hot breath that left your lips. He wrapped one arm around you, flipping both of you over so that his body was atop yours. Feebly, you cleared your throat. The knot in your stomach wound tighter as you scooted back from him, arranging yourself and laying down on the shirt. 

“C-could you… use your fingers first?” You faltered, sounding more nervous than you actually were. The question was fuelled more by curiosity than fear. Jimmy’s cocoa-coloured eyes seemed to darken even more, mischievously. 

“First, huh?” An adorable crooked smile cut across his face. With lips pursed, you shot him a sideways glance. By this point, he had to have known what you wanted, but acted as aloof and innocent as ever. He returned your glance with a wink, knee-walking himself closer to you. With a tight breath, you shimmied out of your panties, setting them next to you in the grass. Your dress skirt had enough length, providing a layer of protection between your ass and the ground. 

He stretched his hand, curling and uncurling his long, conjoined digits, like a runner stretching his legs for the marathon ahead. You had him feeling nervous, like a virgin on prom night, so he was thankful for the familiarity of using his hands. He was used to this part. He knew how this went.

You propped yourself up on your elbows, eager to watch. Jimmy’s fingers fell to touch you, nearing your entrance. The tips of them grazed your slit, slipping along your drenched folds and spreading the wetness. His thumb circled your clit, sending a shockwave through your body. The muscles in your abdomen immediately tightened, and a searing ache started just above your bladder. A breathy moan left your lips as you arched your spine upwards in white hot ecstasy. 

“Feel good? Tell me, baby.” 

“Y-yeah,” you whined. “Yeah, it does.” 

He looked down at you, craning his neck to get a better view. You were more than ready; leaking like a faucet. You’d probably been ready, but Jimmy was usually a gentleman and favoured comfort over speed. He did it with all sorts of girls all across the country, for cryin’ out loud. He knew how to get ‘em worked up enough that he could bottom out in one thrust. But of course, he rarely did. They didn’t want his cock, they wanted his freak fingers. 

But not you. You wanted all of him. 

Jimmy held his breath as he curled one set of pincers back towards his palm, inserting the other into your cunt. He exhaled heavily; it was warm and slick, the sweetest thing he’d ever felt. 

“Hohh… babydoll…” He closed his eyes, and began pumping. You were already writhing and panting underneath him. Jimmy grinned bright. He loved the noises that all the pretty girls made when he touched them, but there was something special about the noises you were making. You were expelling these short, high breaths, and thrusting your hips to meet his fingers each time. The immediacy of his need hit him like a freight train. His cock twitched in his briefs, demanding attention. He needed you. Now. His cock tensed again, urging more pre-cum from the tip. 

“You ready, sweetheart?” 

He prayed to the stars above that you’d say yes. When he saw your curls bounce with the motion of your nodding, he heaved a sigh of relief and flopped over, reaching into his jeans to free his cock from its cloth prison. You couldn’t help but gawk at the way that it stood attention, red and angry and looking for somewhere to go. 

“C’mon. On top. I’ll give you the real ride uh’ your life now.”

You gathered your dress and petticoat into your hands before throwing one leg over his waist. Beneath you, Jimmy held his cock, guiding it blindly over your slick folds. You whimpered every time the hot tip bumped into your aching clit. Straightening up on your knees, you paused, doubting your ability to take him all in one go. He sensed your hesitation. 

“It’s alright baby, take it nice n’ slow.” His accent was like honey, dribbling out and coating your heart in a warm, sticky mess.

“I’ve just never,” Jimmy pressed a conjoined digit into your lips, shaking his head. “Don’t gotta’ explain yourself. It’s gonna feel good to me either way.” 

Your knees spread, slipping against the warm grass as you lowered yourself down onto his cock. At first, the squish of his head was comforting and the heat felt good — really good, but then it was the strain of your cunt trying to accept his girth. You forced your hips down further, and your cunt swallowed the head and half of the shaft.

“Ohh… my god.” As the stinging stretch subsided, making room for his thick cock, a deep moan echoed over the field. Gingerly, you moved your body up and down, feeling full and tense.  Jimmy made a fist in front of his mouth, squeezing his eyes shut tight. Sure, he got some tail every now and then, but it was his hand more often than not. He led a “satisfy them now, worry about yourself later” kind of lifestyle, and all for a couple bucks. 

But this… this… 

He groaned loud, unconsciously thrusting his hips and stuffing the rest of himself inside of you. His cock bottomed out, veiny and pressing against your slick walls. You winced, overcome by the sensation. It was almost too much, but you took a deep breath, and kept at it.  

Jimmy’s chocolate eyes softened, full of adoration, as he watched you, feeling your body tremble. She’s never ridden anyone before, save for those horses. 

“C’mere, baby. Keep that ass up, and I’ll do the work.” Jimmy’s warm arms wrapped around your back, pulling your chest to his. His arms enveloped your, warm biceps pressing against your shoulders. You nuzzled your nose into his neck, and that’s when he took ahold of your ass, digging his digits into the marshmallow-soft flesh of your cheeks. You backed your hips out slightly, adjusting to the new position. 

With a slow breath, he started thrusting up into you. His cock was so slick, messily slipping in and out of you with ease, and the way it was hitting you, the way the ridges of his head popped in and out of your cunt… made your eyes rolled backwards. 

“I don’t think you’re a freak,” you panted, meeting his hips. “I promise.”

At first, he didn’t answer, only craned his neck up to kiss you hard. His tongue delved into your mouth, swirling hungrily along yours. You moaned into his mouth. Loud. His large hands, spread out on your ass, moved up and down with each thrust, using it as leverage. You gripped his broad shoulder tight, nails leaving crescent moons in his skin. 

“I know, baby… I know you don’t.” 

The melodies of the cicadas and the rustling grasses hardly concealed the wet slapping of his thick cock as it pounded into you. Loud enough you were sure that someone could — and would — hear. But it felt so good. You couldn’t stop even if the entire freak show was standing around you, watching, taking notes. 

He fucked harder and the feeling of his cock as it massaged your cunt, hitting all the right spots at a gentle curve had you whining into his ear. In your shoes, your toes curled tightly, almost cramping. You begged for him, cried for him, and told him how good it felt. He groaned, moaned and growled in response each time you did. Called you angel face, baby doll, and honey — names that sounded so good on his lips. You shuddered hard against his warm body, drenched in sweat. 

Jimmy let out a series of pants as he picked up his speed. You were so close, whining brokenly with every hit of his cock. With a sudden deep sound, his whole body tensed. The veins in his neck popped and his teeth clenched tight, sounds of ecstasy breaking free from between them. You felt the heat of his cum coat your insides and it sent you over the edge — your own orgasm ran after his, clenching around his cock, and leaking down onto his thighs. His thrusts slowed sporadically, twitching up into you before they finally subsided. 

He wrapped his arms around you as his cock softened inside of you, both of you panting in unison. Subconsciously, he was protecting you from the chill that would inevitably settle on your sweat-coated body. As he stared up at the stars, the twinkling little pinpricks of light, Jimmy Darling promised you another ride — one home. He didn’t have the heart to tell you that this was his last weekend in your quaint little city. He wasn’t quite ready for that devastation yet.

t a g l i s t : @kaismanwich / @redwoodghost / @elsamarss / @silverzoomiesies / @kaisbasementwhore / @thewolveswithin / @80strashbag / @twinkiemaximoff / @spill-the-t / @stucktothetwo / @evansb1tch / @enchanting-evan / @yesdevineruler / @enchanting-evan / @anonymous0316 / @eventually27 / @violetharmonscupcake/ @my-own-walker / @kai-slut / @fuckedbykai / @iluwmycats / @dewberryobssesed / @the-goblin1 / @dirtyfairy97 / @jellyluvr / @strangerthings420 / @kai-anderson-whore / @piecesofcain / @lilthbunny / @quickandsilvers / @tatelangdonsweater / @ifeeltoofuckingmuch / @howtobesasha/ @randodummy / @throwinginmythai /

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[thatlovinfeelin]

He Don't Like The Lights |Bradley Rooster Bradshaw Actor AU| Two

“Here’s another beer.”

“Can I ask you something?” Bradley questioned. 

“Sure, don’t see why not.”

“Why are you working here?” He questioned.

You laughed and took a step towards him, “This seemed as good a place as any. The pay isn’t horrible when you factor in the tips I usually make. It’s not as bad as it seems.”

“But if you could go anywhere else, where would you go?” He asked, seeming serious. 

You merely shrugged, “A city. Like a big city. Somewhere new, I’ve only ever been in Virginia.”

He nodded and took a swig of beer, “The rest of the country isn’t as impressive as you’d think. But I understand wanting to be somewhere other than here.”

“‘Well, you can say that. You’ve been everywhere,” You laughed, “All over the world.” 

He nodded, and shoveled another forkful of mac into his mouth. He let out a moan, which caused your cheeks to turn pink. You liked that sound, and truthfully you wanted to hear more of it. It made you wonder what other sounds he could make. 

“This shit is amazing,” He groaned, “I think this beats what my mom used to make for me.” 

“Well now, let’s not diss a mama’s cooking,” You joked, “Just holler if you need anything okay? I’ll leave you to enjoy your meal.”

“Hey wait!” He called, reaching for your arm, “I have a….favor to ask you.”

“Okayy….”

“This is going to sound strange, but I get the feeling that you aren’t a total psycho,” He stated, “I was supposed to bring my girlfriend home to meet my parents. But I broke up with her, and I haven’t told them yet. Could I convince you to join me?”

“I’m sorry, you want me to pretend to be your girlfriend and meet your parents?” You questioned. 

“Yeah, pretty much. I know it sounds crazy.”

“Crazy? Try insane! I could be anyone, I’m literally just some random waitress and you want me to come home with you and play house?”

“You could say no.”

“And yet, I don’t want to say no,” You shrugged.

“So you’ll do it?” He smirked, like he knew he was getting his way. 

“Meh, why not,” You shrugged, “I’ve been looking for ways to spice up my life a little. Playing girlfriend to a world famous actor seems like a good way to do it.”

He let out a laugh and snagged a pen from your apron, “Here’s my number, try to resist giving it to everyone? Why don’t you shoot me a text so I have yours too.”” 

“Oh don’t worry, your secret is safe with me.”

The following day, you were running around your bathroom trying to get ready. Celeste was on the couch in the living room, pigging out on three day old pizza while watching old reruns of Nashville. She looked like a slob, like she often did when you had days off together, but you couldn’t not when Bradley was coming to get you. 

“Hey so I need you not to freak out,” You told Celeste as you fluffed your hair again. 

“What’s going on?”

“So that single table from last night?” She nodded as you chewed on your lip, “That was sort of Bradley Bradshaw, and he’s on his way here now to pick me up for a….date.”

Celeste sputtered, “Sounded like you said a date.”

“I did.”

“You’re lying. This is some cruel joke.” 

“I wish I was C.” 

The knock on your door caused you to panic slightly. You turned around and looked in the mirror again, deciding your lipstick was the wrong color. Panicking even more, you turned around and ran back into your bathroom, yelling at Celeste as you did. 

“Can you get that? Please?” 

You could hear Celeste sigh and get up from the couch before unlocking the door. You wished Bradley would’ve waited outside like you originally told him to. You didn’t want him to see your shit apartment, but he insisted on coming up to the door and getting you. 

You heard the second she opened the door and realized who was on the other side. Because the door slammed shut followed by a scream. 

“HOLY FUCK!” She yelled, “HOOOLLLY SHIT!”

You ran out of the bathroom again, sliding in a fresh pair of earrings, “Open the damned door, C!” You hiss at her. 

“That’s Bradley fucking BRADSHAW!” She hissed back, “I just slammed the door in Bradley Bradshaw’s face. Oh my god. Holy fucking shit. He’s outside.”

“Yes, which is why we need to open the door!” You groaned, pushing past her, “Hey, I’m sorry about her,” You said, swinging the door back open. 

“No harm done,” He laughed, “I take it that was Celeste?” 

You sigh and nod, “Yeah that was her.”

“Oh my god he knows my name,” Celeste seemed to be hyperventilating behind you. 

“Is she okay?” He asked you, pointing to C. 

You shook your head, “No, she won’t recover from this one, I’m afraid.” 

“Anything I can do?”

“Just get me out of here,” You laughed, “She’ll come to again once we leave.”

He laughed and held out his hand for you. You took it and smiled at him, feeling a zap of energy as you did so. You needed to keep your head on straight, this was just a one time deal. You were going to help him out with his parents and he’d go back to LA and forget all about this. You would get the ability to say you met Bradley Bradshaw, maybe get a picture or two with him and it would be something to tell the kids one day. 

He walked you out to his rental car, which was more nondescript than you expected. You thought he would be driving something like a Porsche or a Corvette but instead he was driving a slightly beat up pickup truck, which looked like it was going to be retired from the fleet soon enough. 

But he seemed to be at home in the car. He knew his way around it, didn’t seem to miss a beat as he started driving down the road. His parents lived in Virginia Beach, not far from the base. Bradley said that’s where they lived from the time he was born, aside from a few short years in California. Which was where Bradley fell in love with acting. 

You learned a lot about him during that short drive. Like he was giving you a crash course, so you could keep up and act like you were madly in love with him. You gave him details about your life too, how you’d grown up in Norfolk, the daughter of shipyard workers. How you went to college but haven’t used your degree. You were an only child, but always had animals growing up, including a bunny. Bradley laughed at that. He could somehow imagine you as a little girl snuggling with a bunny. 

“My mom is a little much,” He warned as he pulled in the driveway of a quaint little house, “Dad is chill, you’ll probably love them.”

“How much is a little much?” You questioned. 

“She’s just protective, and energetic,” he explained, “You’ll survive though. I’m sure you’ve dealt with worse at the bar.” 

He helps you out of the car, and walks you to the door with his hand on the small of your back. It feels like how a relationship should be. You felt nervous as you walked up to the door. He winked at you before knocking. It took all of two seconds before the door swung open to reveal a small woman with graying blonde hair.

“Bradley!” She cheered, grabbing him and hugging him tightly, “And you must be the girlfriend we know nothing about.” 

“Um.”

“Ignore her,” An older man said, stepping into view, “She’s in mom mode.” 

“This is Y/N,” Bradley said, wrapping his arms around you. 

“I’m Carole, this is Nick but everyone calls him Goose,” The woman stated, kissing the man’s cheek. 

“I take it that’s from your days in the Navy?” You questioned. 

“Ah, so he did tell you a few things,” Goose laughed, “We used to call Bradley here, Rooster when he was a kid. His hair would always stick up like a rooster’s tail.”

“Aww, Rooster, that’s cute,” You coo, hugging Bradley a little tighter. 

You couldn’t tell if it was too much or not. You’d never fake dated anyone before, but you figured laying it on thick couldn’t hurt. Bradley just smiled and kissed the top of your head.You had to be playing the part right, because he squeezed your side affectionately. Which made Mrs.Bradshaw smile as she ushered you both into the house. 

She started talking about how she cooked Bradley’s favorite for dinner, and she hoped you were hungry because she made extra, as always. She made a joke about how much Bradley could eat when he actually let himself and wasn’t on a diet for some sort of movie. Adding that you had to know all about that. 

You laughed and told her that you took him to your favorite restaurant on the boardwalk and got him hooked on Pulled Pork Mac N Cheese. She just said that sounded like her boy. 

Meanwhile, Mr. Bradshaw and Bradley seemed to be doing their own sort of catching up. They clapped each other on the shoulder and disappeared into the side room, leaving you alone with Carole. You swallowed thickly and tried your best to keep up. But you felt like you were in over your head. You knew next to nothing about Bradley, save for what you read on the internet and what he told you on the way here and last night over text. But even still you knew nothing that a real girlfriend would know. 

It made you panic slightly. Because you felt like she would find out. Like she would see right through you in a heartbeat. Like it was only a matter of time. 

“Rude of him to leave you alone like that,” She shook her head, “I thought I raised him better than that. But whenever he sees his dad…well we almost lost Goose when Bradley was younger. The two of them have a bond I could never understand. So it’s always special when they’re able to spend time together.” 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t know that,” You’re stunned with the way she said it so casually. 

“Brad doesn’t like to talk about it. Goose was in a training accident, it was a real scare for all of us.”

“Well I’m glad he’s okay.”

“So am I, I don’t know what I would do without him,” Carole sighed, leaning against the kitchen counter, “So do you want to tell me where he found you? Because honey, you seem very sweet, but I know you aren’t dating my son.”

Well….you were fucked.

#bradley bradshaw #bradley rooster bradshaw #rooster bradshaw #bradley bradshaw imagine #rooster top gun #rooster bradshaw imagine #top gun #top gun maverick #bradley bradshaw fic #bradley bradshaw fanfiction #bradley bradshaw x reader #bradley bradsaw x reader #rooster bradshaw fanfiction #rooster bradshaw x reader #rooster bradshaw fic #rooster x reader #bradley rooster bradshaw imagines #bradley rooster bradshaw imagine #bradley rooster x reader #bradley rooster x y/n #bradley bradshaw x y/n #rooster bradshaw x you #rooster bradshaw x female reader #bradley bradshaw x female reader

[starsreminisce]

The trope treasure trove that is Elucien is what is keeping me going

If Elain is insisting to be a part of the NC, she’s eventually will have to interact with him, especially if he’s at a point where he’s reporting directly to Rhys.

We literally could have:

He falls first but she falls harder

side glances and pretending not to pay attention

the breaths close to the skin

the near touches or brushing of fingertips

Elain learning more about him through other people

Lucien discovering Elain’s dry wit and humor

Elain slowly tracing his scars as he tells her they were because he stood up to people he cared for and how self-conscious he is about them

Lucien getting to see just how angry Elain is with everything and smiling saying “finally”

angsty confessions hopefully in the rain

angry aggressive kissing hopefully in the rain

sneaking around coz of they’re not ready to tell people

prim and proper in the streets, freaky in the sheets

IC trying to guess what exactly is going on between them but they don’t know themselves coz they can’t keep their hands off each other when they’re alone

trying to justify it’s the bond that’s making them feel this way about each other

the freaking banter that would happen between them!

“I have done everything - everything - within my power so you can be happy, what more can I do?”

“My own mother was trapped in a marriage she didn’t want, do you think of me so cruel as to wish that life for you?” “It’s not that.” “Then what is it? Why would you want to subject us to this purgatory?” “Because I can’t breathe when I try to reject the bond. I’ve tried. I’ve tried and I just … can’t…"

"Lucien, I was supposed to be married. I was going to have the life I'd dreamed of since I was a little girl." "And I will never forgive myself for taking that from you." "But I do. Because it wasn't the dream I wanted."

"Who was she?" "Nobody" "Didn't look like nobody by the way she was talking to you." "Lady Elain, are you jealous?" "No ... I ... I just didn't like the way she was talking to you." "I wasn't aware you had a habit of watching other females talk to me. Quite nasty, actually." "You're insufferable." "Am I? She didn't seem to think so when she was talking to me."

"I'm sorry! That was a mis-" "No, Elain, never a mistake. Never."

"Why don't you run along to that little bat boyfriend of yours. I'm sure he's hanging around here somewhere as though I am not allowed be around my own mate." "He's not here." "He's a terrible spy, of course he's here." "He is not. He's the best we have." "Please. He was in love with Mor for 500 years and couldn't figure out that Rita's is a gay bar?" "MOR IS GAY?" "Told you Azriel was lurking close by”

"You are such a ... such a ..." "Say it" "PRICK!" "... now I know you definitely hang around Feyre too much."

"You're staring, Lady Elain." "Am not. I had a vision." "Fascinating" "What?" "Just every time I take my shirt off, you seem to have a vision, is all." “Probably to shield myself from looking at your body.” “Are you having another vision again?” “No…” “because you’re staring at my chest again, Lady Elain”

“I wanted to take Feyre’s place when Tamlin abducted her, but now I’m thankful that I didn’t.” “Confidently, you would have broken the curse within a month.” “I know for a fact I wouldn’t. I would have condemned you all to her rule.” “I doubt that, not when I was helping Tamlin along.” “That’s the problem. I would have fallen for you instead.”

“Must you smile at every female who walks by?” “How am I at fault that they smile at me first?”

“I don’t see why you have a problem with your scar. It’s a sexy scar.” “A sexy scar?” “Yes… ohhh… you know what I mean.” “I don’t. Indulge me.” “Lucien, please.” “No no no no. You started it so might as well finish it. What do you mean by sexy scar?” “You know … a scar … that looks sexy…” “That’s a horrible explanation.” “You’re my mate so you’re supposed to know what I mean.” “So I’m your mate now?” “I hate you.” “I don’t think you do when I’m your mate with a sexy scar.” “Prick.” “I know.”

“Is it really that hard for you to say that you love me?” “Yes, it is” “Then what are we-” “Those three words aren’t enough to convey how I feel about you. I love you doesn’t even begin to cover how I deeply feel about you. It’s more. I more than love you. I am willing to betray my own morals for you.” “You’d … kill for me?” “If you wished for it, yes. Without hesitation.”

“Oh yea? This is you ‘I’m Lucien Vanserra, I hate the scar on my face so much that I don’t notice how every female gawks at me’ that’s you!” “Well I’m Lady Elain Archeron. I am so beautiful that I bring kings to their knees and I don’t notice how everyone turns their head at me. That’s you!” “I’m Lucien Vanserra and look how strong I am with my muscles and my thighs.” “I’m Lady Elain Archeron and look how pretty I am with my lips and my doe eyes.” “I’m Lucien Vanserra and look how broad my chest is for you to … drag your fingers across and … to steady you as you ride my gigantic cock.” “I’m Lady Elain Archeron and look how perfectly perky my breasts are and how quick my nipples harden when you … when you...” “Finish your sentence.” “What?” “What?” “What were we arguing about?” “I don’t … I don’t recall.”

"Are you going to die for Jesminda or are you going to live for me?"

#elain x lucien #elucien #pro elucien #originally a reddit comment #the grin forever etched on my face

[loraliewritesthings]

Danny Phantom but make him a circus/freakshow attraction headcanons

Maybe he was sold maybe he was captured. Danny couldn't quite remember threw the pain. The lab accident felt like decades ago but time goes slow when your hurting

The blood blossoms were always underfoot. The cage was small his muzzle tight and he was hungry.

So so hungry

Still he didn't look forward to his preformances to the gawking masked people or the salt circle his cage would be placed in or turning from boy to ghost for entertainments sake.

The first time he tried to escape when his box was opened.

That of course only made his capturer mad and earned him more blood blooms.

Dick hated places like this. Cruel hurtful places sullying the name of the circus. Maybe that's why he jumped at the chance to help spy on the freakshow that had recently come to town despite Bruce's worried expression. It wasn't hard to convince Bruce to let him go though. He knew circus lingo better than anyone else in the family after all. Sure his slang MAY be a little outdated but it didn't matter too much for just a few nights.

Dick has seen some horrible things and stayed pretty lighthearted, but because the circus is so sacred to him I think he takes this mission very seriously.

In the end it's him Bruce on the mission.

It wasn't hard to locate where the metas and "freaks" were being kept.

He entered the tent and between a man labeled "the cannibal" and Killer Croc who somehow got dragged into this, there was a young man in a muzzle kneeling on what looked like flowers.

Something about his eyes made him look almost haunted.

He moved on to the next row taking note of every poor soul there.

He was going to get them free.

Sure Bruce didn't like metas, but he wasn't heartless. It didn't take long for him to divide the staff into the willing and unwilling participants. It took him even less time to tie up the willing workers and to call in the Gotham police department.

When batman went to talk to the victims one stood out to him. The boy was muzzled his eyes rapidly switching from blue to green.

He couldn't have been older than Jason.

No one else there was muzzled.

He wondered briefly what made him so dangerous.

The question nagged at him as he asked person after person how they got here.

As expected no one was there voluntarily.

Speaking to an albino set of twins, the last to be questioned, he asked about the boy in the muzzle.

One twin merely shrugged and said he had been there the longest.

It was enough to strike empathy in him.

He approached carefully removing first the lock then the muzzle.

The young man almost pushed past him to get out.

Starting his questioning he asked where he was from and what his name is.

The young man, Danny apparently, didn't seam to remember much outside of the circus though. Where some of the more recently "aquired" captives remembered the older ones didnt

He could only imagine it was trauma holding them back.

Because this place was all he could remember, Danny didn't know what he wanted to do after he was free besides get far far away.

Bruce asked him no more questions.

General headcanons:

Danny is still sassy in this au but he's also bitter.

He doesn't talk much at first cause he's not used to it cause of the muzzle.

It takes quite a while for him to become more like his own self.

Sits on top of Wayne manor staring at the stars he doesn't remember why though.

He has "sad eyes" as babs and steph phrased it.

Bruce didn't mean to keep danny. He's basically a foster fail.

He will never here the end of such from Alfred.

Talking about Alfred he handles the new addition just fine

After all Danny broody and sassy.

He even has the light eyes dark hair combo.

Danny is kinda a foil to Dick. Where Dick is cheerful, Danny is jaded

Where Dick sees the circus as sacred Danny sees it as a trigger

They get along ok weirdly enough.

Jason swore when he first saw Danny.

"Bruce you got another damn kid"

Offers to take him away from Bruce if ever needed. Offer always stands.

Tim doesn't notice the ghost boy for about a week. He was just too sleep deprived.

When he did he assumed danny was a sleep deprivation hallucination

Now he doesn't know how to approach him so he treats him like he's always been there.

Cass understands Danny.

The silence between them is comfortable and amicable

Damian is Damian.

He isn't sure what to think so at first he comes of as aggressive.

That stands until he sees Danny in a fight for the first time.

Now he only wonders now this meta who can turn invisible and fly got caught.

He thinks better then to ask.

Slowly Danny learns to trust again. To live again.

#danny phantom #danny fenton #dp x dc #batman #dc #bruce wayne #dc x dp #circus freak danny au #dick grayson #cassandra cain #jason todd #timothy drake #damian wayne #headcanons #danny phantom headcanon #angst

[darkcrowprincess]

The losers club parents:

*trigger warning use of homophobic words*

*their parents have all noticed their children have been missing together for hours. They start looking in all the spots the kids hang out.*

Mrs and Mr Uris calling out together, their voices echoing together out near the barrens: STAN!! STANLEY!

Mrs Denbrough freaking out and hyper ventilating: We cant lose another child Zack! I can't lose another baby!

Mr Denbrough tries to console her but it feels like empty words: We'll find him. He'll be alright. Its not like Georgie he's with his friends.

Mr and Mrs Hanlon yell out together next: MIKE!!

Sonia Kaspbrak: Your children are never going near Eddie again! You hear me!

Mr and Mrs Hanlon call out again: MIKE!

Maggie Tozier is unfortunately stuck near Sonia, her husband up ahead with Ms Hanscom so they both could call out for Richie and Ben together. The parents have spread out in a big circle near the woods of the barrens. Each calling out their childrens names hoping they'll hear it. Maggie was unfortunately left to deal with Sonia( who they were surprised that the hypochondriac actually agreed to look with them)

Maggie tries to be nice and puts a comforting hand on Sonia's shoulder: Sonia it will be alright. Well find them. It's not any of the boys fault.

Sonia slaps the women's hand away and goes on a horrible tirade: NO! My Eddie Bear is delicate. He should have never run off with any of these boys! Especially your son!

Maggie is finally pissed off(and protective): What do you mean by that?!

Sonia with a cruel smile on her face: You know what your son is like. The whole town knows what a dirty boy he is. But I will not have that little faggot infecting my son with his disgusting feelings!

Maggie slaps the woman hard across her face. Red is in her vision. Her long nails leave scratches along her fat cheek.

Wentworth, goes to stop his wife from full on beating the shit out of Eddies bitch of a mother: Maggie!

Maggie: Our children are missing and all you care about is saying hurtful things about my son! I don't give a shit if my son is gay or both our kids have feelings for each other! As long as they're happy!

Maggie is about to jump on the vile woman but her husband picks her up. She's still tries to kick and hit at Sonia (unknowingly, she looks a lot like her son in that moment).

Maggie: You are a vile woman and your son deserves better. FRANK WOULD HATE YOU, especially for what your doing to your son.

Sonia: YOU BITCH! You take that back!

Sonia is held back by Mr and Mrs Denbrough.

Maggie: Why its not like I'm lying, Frank if he was alive right now would take Eddie away from you and never look back! And it be within his right! Your suffocating your son!

Sonia screams in anger: I'm protecting him! Its because of all your kids!

The two mothers keep fighting. Which causes the other parents to come closer and try to help. Unknowingly their children are at the top of the cliff of the barrens hearing everything.

All 7 of the losers peak their heads over the cliff to watch everything. Like little animals popping their heads out of hidding.

Eddie and Richie both stare at each other in shock.

Bill: W-we need to get down there. I-I can't believe t-the-y ww-were looking for us.

Richie: Do we have to, I'm actually finding it really cool how badass my mom is being right now.

Bill: R-richie! What about Eddie?!

Eddie with a bit of satisfaction for himself: Give it a few more minutes. Mrs Tozier just tackled my mom into the mud.

The losers all look back to see the fight.

Eddie to Richie: Your mom is so cool.

Richie with stars in his eyes: 🤩 I know right.

Richie without thinking moves fully out of hiding to cheer his mom on: GO MOM!

Maggie who finally hears her son, looks up to see the kids on the cliff: RICHIE?!

The other losers: Richie! How are we suppose to explain this to them?!

*This being the fact that they just finished fighting an evil space clown*

Richie: Oops.

Maggie dropping Sonia Kaspbrak back into the mud, yells back up to her son: RICHARD WENTWORTH TOZIER! Get your ass down here now! You know how worried we have all been!

Richie nervous now: Ooooh full name not good.

#the losers club #it #losers club #loser club parents #reddie #my writing #maggie tozier #maggie vs sonia #it chapter 1

[allsortsedits]

Love Notes

Pairing: Eddie Munson x Gender Neutral Reader

Summary: Leaving love notes in Eddie Munson's locker for your friend turns sour when you find out she's not being sincere about her feelings

Warnings: Bullying, Jason Carver (I think that's it?)

It surprised you really. When your best friend confessed to you that she had a crush on a certain metal head. She’s a cheerleader and you always hear her make fun of him. Agreeing with Jason on everything. Calling Eddie a freak, a cult leader, a satinist

So when she asked you to help her write notes to put in Eddie’s locker you didn’t know what to do. She’s your best friend and you wanted to help her. You just thought it was strange to see her sudden change of heart. But since you believed her and wanted her to be happy you agreed to help her

The look of pure happiness that erupted on the cute metal heads face was hard to miss. A slight blush crept to his cheeks about having a secret admirer. Then suddenly his face changed expressions from happiness to sadness in a matter of seconds. Who the hell would be writing him notes like this? Leaving them in his locker? Surely it was a joke. A cruel, horrible joke

He thought the notes would stop but they didn’t. They kept coming and kept saying sweet nothings he’s always wanted to hear. Someone actually liked him. HIM. Eddie Munson. The notes were so pure and sweet. Someone liked him for being himself. He wondered who would write such beautiful notes. He wondered who in the god-forsaken hellhole of a school actually genuinely liked him. Wanted him

“So Quinn, when are you going to tell Eddie that you like him?” You ask your friend. It’s been a while since you started writing the love notes for your friend. You couldn’t tell her that you also in fact were crushing hard on the curly haired boy. So everything you wrote came from the heart

“Soon. Can you write a note telling him to meet me at the diner this Saturday? I think it’s time Eddie knew who his secret admirer is” Quinn smiled at you sweetly. You were excited to write this note. Finally your friend is going to confess

It was the last period of the day and you were scoping the library for a worthy read. A voice behind gives you a fright as you weren’t expecting anyone to be here

“Need a recommendation? Or is the freak's opinion invalid?” Eddie says coming up behind you. He sees you jump a little bit at the sound of his voice

“Sorry didn’t mean to scare you” His voice turns soft. He really didn’t mean to scare you. He thought once you knew who was speaking you would turn your heel and walk away. But to his surprise you didn’t. You stayed planted right where you were

“Oh no! It’s okay. Just wasn’t expecting anyone to be here” You let out a little laugh and you see Eddie smile. Damn that smile. You swore it made the room look brighter somehow. Quinn was one lucky lady. What you would give to have Eddie smile at you like that everyday

“So need a recommendation?” Eddie asks again standing beside you. He starts to lean back on his heels and comes back on his toes. He does this a few times and you can’t tell if it’s nerves or if he just can’t stand still. He watches you looking at the bookshelf of books in front of you. He didn’t seem to understand why you of all people would be friends with a girl like Quinn. Quinn seemed mean and was only nice when it gave her points to the teachers. You on the other hand seemed to be nice to everyone you saw. No matter who they were. You were nice to Jason despite him being an asshole. But you were also very sweet and kind to Dustin and Mike. Giving them lifts home when Nancy or himself were unavailable to do so

“Yeah. I just don’t know what to read” You look lost at all the books layed before you. Most you’ve read anyway but you wanted something new

Eddie flings his bag around to his front and digs inside. He pulls out a tattered looking book that’s definitely seen better days. He hands it to you and you gratefully take it

“It’s called The Hobbit. It’s my favourite book. You can borrow it if you want to read it?” He doesn’t take his eyes off you as you read the blurb on the back

“Thank you Eddie. I would love to borrow it” You finally look at him and give him a smile. He felt his knees weaken at the simple gesture. You knew his name. And you said it without disgust or disdain in your voice

“You know my name?” He asks confused. Usually people just call him freak

“Of course i know your name. I’ll return your book when i’m done. I’ll look after it i promise” You give him another smile as you leave the library. Eddie watches you leave. It was the first act of kindness he’s received from anyone like you. It seemed so genuine. The way your smile reached your eyes. He swore the library looked brighter when you smiled. And you smiled at him. It was for him

As the bell rings for the end of the day Eddie makes his way back to his locker to gather his Hellfire stuff for tonight. There shoved in his locker was another note. It’s been going on for weeks now and Eddie has kept every single note. Whoever was giving them to him wrote the sweetest, kindest things he’s ever heard. And they were all about him. Someone in this school likes him. His felt his heart skip a beat when he read the note

The smile and warmth he felt spread through his chest was something unexplainable. He’s never felt like this before and clearly whoever wrote them thought the world of him. Like he wasn’t just some freak or cult leader. It was almost like they saw through his thick skin and saw Eddie. Just Eddie

He slams his locker shut and carefully puts the note in his bag. He’ll put it with the others tonight when he gets home from Hellfire.

You and Quinn were hanging out at yours. Just talking about whatever you had in your minds

“So Quinn, how long have you liked Eddie? You never talk about him” You start poking around. Quinn is your friend sure but something didn’t seem right. She’s never mentioned or talked about Eddie

“Oh that freak? No darling I don’t like him. Jason has a plan to show him that no one could ever like a freak like him” Her voice dripping with disdain. Her face filled with disgust

Your heart shatters. You’ve been writing down your own personal thoughts about Eddie to help your friend get with him. And now you’re finding out she never liked him. She’s doing it to humiliate him. And the date was tomorrow. How could you tell Eddie? You had no idea where he lives and you don’t have his number

“Quinn I think you need to leave” You snap. You’re getting angry. You didn’t really know Eddie that well but you knew him well enough to know he didn’t deserve this

“What? We were going to have a sleepover!” Quinn exclaims. She’s clearly not happy with getting kicked out of your house. She watches as you pack up her things and drop them in her unexpecting arms. You glare at her and she turns around and leaves. You hear the front door slam shut and suddenly you could feel your eyes fuzz up. Hot tears spilling from your eyes. You angrily wipe them away and take some deep breaths. You couldn’t let this happen

You get under the covers and pull out Eddie’s book. You were nearly finished and you could see why it was his favourite. You finished it just before you fell asleep. It wasn’t a good sleep. You kept tossing and turning the whole night worried about tomorrow. Worried about what Jason and Quinn were going to do to Eddie

The next day Eddie was so excited. He told Wayne all about the notes and how he has a date with his secret admirer tonight at the diner

“Can you believe it Uncle Wayne?! I have a date tonight. Someone wants to be with ME!” He kept throwing clothes all over his room trying to find something nicer than what he usually wore. He wanted to impress whoever was leaving him notes

Wayne stood in his doorway unsure what to think. He thought it was odd that these notes just suddenly appeared. He didn’t want to voice his concerns to his nephew but he was just afraid this was all a trick. A prank to humiliate his nephew. It wasn’t the first time something like this has happened. He just hopes whoever is writing these notes is kind to his boy

“You should just be yourself Eds. Wear what you usually do. If the notes are true then they like you for who you are” Wayne steps into the bedroom and takes the clothes from Eddie. He lays out a band t-shirt, his black jeans and rebrocks. He gives Eddie a pointed a look who looks sheepish. He just wanted to impress his date. But he also knew that the old man was right. He should just be himself

Part of him thinks it was you writing him those notes. A part of him hopes it was you. The way your eyes lit up around him. The way your smile reaches your enchanting eyes. Okay now he’s really hoping it was you

You arrive at the diner in time to see Quinn. You scan the room and see Jason and his goons hiding in the corner. You make your way towards Quinn with determination

“You can’t do this. This isn’t right” You stand over her while she’s sitting down. She bats her eyelashes at you

“You’re supposed to be my friend. Shouldn’t you be happy for me?” Her fakeness dripping in her voice. The outfit she wore left very little to the imagination

“He’s a good person Quinn. And i thought you were too. I was wrong about you. I don’t want to be around you anymore. You’re no longer welcome to my house” You saw a flash of hurt spread across her face but quickly regained a smile when she heard a bell ring indicating someone had come inside

Your gut wrenches as you see Eddie. His eyes meet yours and for a split second you saw him smile. But when he sees you hovering over Quinn it’s quickly replaced by confusion. He finally makes it to the booth

“You can leave now. My dates arrived” Quinn smiles sweetly at Eddie who looks shocked. He sits down across from her and looks up to you

“Eddie I-“ You were cut off by the waiter who asked what the happy couple wanted on their first date. You realised he was in on it. The waiter shoved you aside and you decided to leave. They weren’t going to let you get a word in. They weren’t going to let you ruin what they had planned. You headed to the park to clear your thoughts and tried not to think what’s happening

“You were the one leaving the notes in my locker?” Eddie asked. He didn’t expect someone like Quinn to be leaving him love notes. She didn’t seem the type. He knew her reputation. He got a sick feeling in his stomach and he wondered if you were going to warn him before you got pushed aside

“Of course handsome! How could I not?” Quinn’s voice is dripping with sweetness. Batting her eyelashes at the boy making him flustered. He doesn’t know what to think. He thought it was you. But he was wrong. It was Quinn

The milkshakes and cream pie were quick to come to the table. As Eddie nervously drinks his drink he notices Quinn just watching him

“I didn’t think someone like you would be interested in someone like me” He laughs a little to lighten the mood

The screech of the chairs were heard and Jason and his goons were right there standing beside Quinn

“Is this freak annoying you babe?” Jason squeezes Quinn’s shoulder in affection. She leans into his side making Eddie even more confused and nervous than before

“Yes he is” She shoots daggers at Eddie

“You invited me! You were the one who wanted to go on a date!” He spluttered. He didn’t want to be blamed for something he didn’t do

“Oh god! I could never write that sappy shit about you!” Quinn laughs and Eddie turns embarrassed. If Quinn didn’t write the letters who did?

“No that was Y/N, who left. I don’t know how they came up with that love crap. Can you imagine if THEY liked you?” Quinn let’s out a bigger laugh and the group joins in

Eddie sinks into his chair. Quinn leans forwards towards Eddie

“Who could ever love a freak like you?” She sneers

Before Eddie could react he felt the drinks being poured on top of him and the cream pie getting smeared all over his clothes. The group and the waiter laughed

Eddie stands up and leaves without saying a word. His eyes pricked with tears. He doesn’t want to cry but he does. He really thought someone liked him for him. But this disaster of a date was humiliating enough to make him believe no one could ever like him. Not for himself. Not ever. He would always just be a freak

Your phone pings at a message Quinn had sent you. You open the attachment and it’s Eddie being humiliated. Quinn just sent heaps of laughing faces. Your heart sinks and you feel sick

You hear some leaves crunch and you turn. It’s Eddie and you can hear him sniffing trying to contain the sadness and humiliation he’s endured. You get off the swing and place Eddie’s book in your bag. You approach him carefully

“Eddie?” You ask softly

He jumps a little but relaxes when he sees it’s you. He’s seen how you treat other people and for some reason he believes that right now you’re the only person who wouldn’t make fun of him. Who wouldn’t make him hurt more then he already does

“I’m so sorry. I tried to get her to stop. I asked her to stop. And then you came and i tried but-“ You start to ramble but Eddie cuts you off

“I know. I should’ve known it was too good to be true” He shrugs his shoulders

You frown. He’s had that much rejection, that much humiliation, that much ridicule in his life that he doesn’t believe he deserves something good

“You heading home?” You ask. He nods his head

“Let me help you?” You offer. His eyes spark an interest. He nods his head and you both head towards his trailer

“My uncle isn’t home. It’ll just be the two of us” He says as he opens the door to his home and invites you inside. He’s never had people over before

“Go have a shower and leave your clothes by the door. I’ll put them in the washing machine” You give him a small push to the shower. While you wait you sit on the couch twiddling your thumbs. Once you hear the plop of clothes you get them. You throw them in the washing machine and turn it on

Eddie comes out of the shower with the towel around his waist. You tear your eyes away quickly. Hiding your blushing face and Eddie’s beet red face

When Eddie comes out he looks more comfortable in just a band shirt and some pants. He sits down next to you on the couch

“I know you were the one writing the notes” Eddie says quietly and softly

You stiffen up slightly and Eddie notices. He changes his position so that he’s facing you now. You refuse to look at him. Embarrassed that you played a part in his humiliation

“Why did you write them so Quinn could take credit?” He gently holds your chin in his hand and makes you face him. His face is soft and curious. You sigh and he lets his hand fall away once he knew you weren’t going to look away

“Because I was stupid and believed that she liked you. She said she couldn’t put it into words and just said stuff like ‘write about his eyes’ ‘write about his smile’ but I wrote what I thought”

“Because I didn’t speak up and tell her that I liked you too. I couldn’t do that to my friend and i wanted her to be happy. I didn’t know what she was planning I swear! I would never do that to you” You ramble and tears prick your eyes so you shake your head wanting them to go away but they don’t. They spill out and fall down your cheeks

Eddie sits frozen. You like him. You wrote what you thought about him. You liked his brown eyes that resemble that of a puppy. You liked his smile that makes the room get brighter. You liked his curly crazy hair because it’s unique. You liked the way he dresses because it looked cool and he suited it. You liked him. For being him

“Did you mean what you wrote in those notes?” He finally gets out. He forgot how to speak for a moment. He looks at you as you slowly nod your head. Yes

“I meant every word Eddie” You whisper and he nearly misses it but he hears you

“You like me?” He asks again. And he gets another nod. This time he just smiles and he watches as you smile softly back at him

“I need to hear you say it”

“Please” He holds your face in his hands gently. His eyes pleading for you to speak your feelings

“I like you, Eddie. I like you a lot” You keep smiling at him

He moves a little bit closer to you and leans his forehead against yours. You close your eyes and he does the same

“I like you too. And I was hoping the notes came from you” He confesses. He hears you let out a soft laugh. He could listen to that all day long

He gently closes the already small gap between you and kisses you. You kiss him back making him smile. His hands hold your waist while yours wrap around his neck. He gently moves you not breaking the kiss to have you sitting on his lap

“This okay?” He murmurs against your mouth

“Yeah” You reply breathless

He kisses you again and you tighten your grip around his neck pulling him impossibly closer. He is warm and comforting against you. His hands being incredibly gentle while holding you. You wouldn’t have guessed that from looking at him. You’re happy you get to experience this side of him

You both pull away when you hear someone clear their throat and the door to the trailer closes

“So i take it the date went well then?” Wayne is standing in the doorway watching the teenagers turn impossibly red. He watches as you bury your face in Eddie’s neck and Eddie’s hands rub your back reassuringly

“You could say that uncle” Eddie’s smiles massively. And it’s then that Wayne knows his nephew is in good hands with you. He’s never smiled like that before. He’s never had anyone over before. And here he is. His date on his lap trying to hide their embarrassment with his nephew smiling the cheshire cat

“You staying for dinner young one?” Wayne directs his question to you

“Is that okay?” You finally pull away from Eddie’s neck and look at his uncle

“Course it’s okay. We can get to know each other better” Wayne winks and gives Eddie a cheeky smile making his young nephew groan leaning his head into the crook of your neck and you laugh while stroking his hair gently

He pulls away and looks at you. He adores you. And you adore him

“Thank you for the love notes” Eddie tucks a strand of hair behind your ear as you give him a soft smile

“I can write more?” You offer as you caress the side of his face gently sending shivers down the boys spine

“Sign them this time” He takes your hand in his as you both get off the couch. He leads you to the dining table and sits you next to him

“I will” You promise. You give Wayne a smile who smiles back at you

Yeah

His nephew will be just fine with you

#eddie munson #eddie munson fluff #stranger things #eddie stranger things #eddie munson comfort #eddie munson fanfic #eddie x reader #eddie x you #love notes #i love you

[musashi]

Hey, you're really the only person I follow who appreciates Manfred in all his glory, so just a quick question but do you have any tips on characterising him when writing?

genuinely, we see very little of him in canon, so a lot of how you characterize him is up to you! some people make him evil incarnate, cruel just for the sake of cruelty, and there is really little in canon that contradicts that. others, like me, prefer to make him a very over the top villain in mannerisms alone but with a good deal of humanity still buried within.

i tend to be INCREDIBLY selective with the words i read RE: him so i don't exactly know what pitfalls people fall into other than just kinda making him a horrible child abuser who does what he does for no reason other than to cause pain. off the top of my head though here's some things i think to keep in mind abt manfred:

he believes he is on the side of good. i feel like miles is one of the only prosecutors who people really keep this in mind about. even though the prosecutors of AA are antagonists by definition, they believe they serve a vital role, that of punishing evil. from the perspective of the prosecutor, they are handing down justice and putting away evildoers. this might seem very 'duh' but because you play as a defense attorney in AA you are predisposed to see them as their own sort of evil, coming after innocents. it's important to remember there are two sides to every story.

adding onto this, his proteges see him this way! miles and franziska both view him as a noble man who fights for justice. in the anime, franziska says of him, "he's basically like a superhero. he never lets the bad guys get away."

manfred is charismatic. a lot of people playing the game dislike him outright because of how tough an opponent he is right from the get-go. but he has both the charisma and the domineering attitude to get the courtroom to hang on his every word. there is a reason he commands attention and is revered as the legend he is.

manfred is not serious all the time. he makes stupid dad jokes in court. he likes karaoke. he has incredibly strong opinions on fashion and berates the other prosecutors for not dressing better. people get so tunnel visioned on all the bad things he has done that they forget he is in the ace attorney series, which is a very silly series alongside all its seriousness.

many canons show that manfred loves his family. this includes miles. even if you want to make him manipulative and abusive, it's important to remember this. abusers can and do love their victims, and it makes for a much more compelling story!

manfred obsessively plans ahead. if he wants something to get done, he has likely thought of every single obstacle that might stand in his way and taken care of it pre-emptively. remember that phoenix might have called that parrot to the stand, but manfred predicted he would do it. a lot of people pretty erroneously claim that manfred got where he did by lying, cheating, forging evidence, etc--this is, again, something that is not present in canon before 1-4. even the penalty that caused DL6 was something that manfred was actively misled about. he was good at his job.

manfred is a control freak. when he begins to lose control of a situation, that's when his mask is likely to slip.

he is stony, cold, calculating, and dismissive of that which he's disinterested in. manfred views most things as below him & his ilk. he is passionate about what he loves and has little tolerance for what he doesn't.

like his proteges he is wordy and overly formal in his speech. if you can write franziska & miles' dialogue you can write manfred's, he's the reason they talk like that. the biggest difference is that he tends a little more toward finding different ways to call something ridiculous. franziska will say foolish every time. manfred will say asinine, infernal, trifling, anything in that general area of 'why do you talk like a fucking video game villain'

honestly if you can write franziska you can write manfred. they are very similar. the biggest difference is that franziska is young and has a more flexible worldview--her concept of what justice is can shift and change. manfred is set in his ways, he believes in good and evil and little in the area between. franziska is also a lot more loving and protective. the biggest difference between them is their prosecution style: manfred wants trials done quick, franziska wants to drag them out as long as possible and follow every thread, crushing each argument one by one. to manfred, "perfect justice" is exposing the truth as quickly as possible, clean and succinct. to franziska, it is making sure no scrap of it remains unexplored.

this literally only applies to court scenes but its a huge pet peeve i have: manfred does not refer to the judge as 'your honour.' he exclusively and informally calls him judge, likely as a power move. little thing but it can make all the difference. iirc he also does this to a lot of others ie 'defense attorney' 'detective' etc but most of that is in aai which is very take it or leave it canon with some weird localization choices tbh.

thats all i can think of i am so bad with general questions but if you have any questions in particular please hmu

#wendy rambles #manfred von karma

[skaruresonic]

The idw discourse is so bad, I feel caught in the middle because each time I express how bad the storytelling is, in a new issue or how off model the characters are drawn, idw fans gang up on me. But on the other hand I don't want to be associated with the people who think think it's funny to tweet how Flynn should die or make weird assumptions about Stanley being a bad person ? Like that's weird and cruel. Hate their work not them as people.

I just decided to pretend the comic doesn't exist and it helps lol.

I'm sorry that happened to you. Idk if anyone else will tell you that, but I will, because I know how much it sucks.

One time, I saw a guy on Twitter blame us for his inability to criticize the book in what he believed was a much more "balanced" manner without getting harassed by people.

Digest that for a moment. It's our fault for other people's reaction to us. And instead of rubbing his brain cells together for a moment and questioning the reasons why this knee-jerk reaction occurs, or even reflecting on the fact that it occurs at all and perhaps realizing that the call is coming from inside the house, he fell back on old biases and decided it was the haters who were wrong.

The mental gymnastics on display here are unreal.

In this case, I think people are stumbling into the usual fallacious trap of assuming both sides carry equal weight, and thus believe that defaulting to a position of "neutrality" makes them morally superior somehow.

That's kind of what I hate about this fandom - the utter superciliousness. The rotten shit we as a fandom get up to (and no, being a little snarky in a reblog does not count as harassment) while proclaiming love and light uwu. Be nice to everyone, except those freaks over there.

"Neutrality" is in scare quotes here because it's not true neutrality, but a way of posturing to the in-group that you're not Like Us. As demonstrated by my Twitter-user anecdote, people around here don't want to say anything hater-flavored because it risks intense ostracization. That's why you have people jumping down your throat for presenting even mild criticisms. It'd be pathetic if it weren't so annoying.

I'm not talking about people who let well enough alone. I'm talking about centrists who sneer "both sides are bad," as if by distancing themselves from the situation in a smug manner, they're declaring themselves more enlightened than the rest of us.

Honestly, the other side should be just as insulted, but they're not, because this attitude only helps them in the long run.

In reality, this is more like the fishhook situation centrists have with antis vs. proshippers. Saying "this whole thing is stupid" really only benefits antis because they now have grounds to reply, "Yes, this IS stupid, don't you think proshippers are crazy for being upset at something so trivial?" while conveniently omitting the part where antis routinely send proshippers death threats and other heinous material.

Look at it from this angle: the most concrete harm I have seen their side say they've suffered is a deep discomfort and estrangement from the book. Which, yeah. That sucks. But it's also kinda on you to just click away if it makes you uncomfortable.

On the other hand, I have had legitimate crying fits because of horrible messages I received and have told people multiple times about the anon who mocked my recently-deceased mom. Which, unlike clicking away from a blog, I had no choice but to see sometimes because I was still naive enough to believe people would behave themselves in my inbox. In fact, a mutual were recently discussing our anxieties over retaliation should IDW be cancelled. There's stuff about this that you just don't want to think about because dwelling on it will freak you out.

"Both sides are bad" stings, especially in light of knowing the measures I have taken to walk on eggshells and draw proper boundaries. I literally cannot know if someone in this fandom will consider my explanations harassment and dogpiling, so I try not to reblog with commentary. On the reblogging site.

Reflect on how fucked-up that is, to feel uncomfortable adding a tag to someone's fanart because you're worried they might realize you're One of Them(tm) and shun you on that basis alone.

I won't sit here and say I've always been perfect in my conduct, but at the same time, it's just the infuriating experience of double standards all the way down. Somehow it never occurs to them that if I held them to the same standard they hold me, I could call them all out on intellectual dishonesty for refusing to engage with any of our points no matter how calmly or clearly stated because "lol ur just a hater," and tar them with the same brush as those who sent me death threats.

But ofc, things don't work out like that in the calculus of Le Sonic Discourse. It's just a rotten experience to the core.

#asks

[auncyen]

what are your thoughts on loop and siffrin’s hangout in the tree? it always seemed excessively cruel imo, just to prove that sif dying wasn’t the only way to loop. i feel like there were other ways, so i guess i can’t understand completely understand why they would do it.

had loop not pointed out the party dying or had the party managed to beat the king w/o sif, do you think sif would have still looped? Or at the very least managed to make it to the next day?

Anon. are you my loop. afheiohfe LMFAO I'm just. amused by the question because yeah tbh I don't really like the Loop hangout either. I get critical under the cut, so this is only getting a spoilers tag.

I think Siffrin was going to loop then. They probably would have realized what the flash was, or even just realized that the time of day means either the party's made it to the King or things have already ended badly for them, and now they're down a fighter. Siffrin does try to cling to hope at times so I can see him trying to persuade himself that Mirabelle would know the shield, she'd know to shield even if he didn't warn her right??? so maybe they didn't instantly die! but again, they're down a fighter. Even if they win the fight, surely they'd hate him for abandoning them in the final hour. I think he'd give himself a panic attack out of worry and guilt and shame and loop. Loop just hurried it up, probably because they were already hating themself (which, this sure makes it rich for them to try to point out to Siffrin later in act 5 that he's being an ass for saying mean things to the party LOL).

If you want my thoughts. This isn't in the ISAT tag because the hangout is one of the low points of the game for me. It was the "oh, we're just doing shock value now" bit of my first playthrough. I didn't think it made sense then just because how does the party get to the King anyway (even if they can still beat/avoid all the sadnesses without Siffrin and avoid the rock trap/find all the keys because they're like. being more cautious with them gone, they only have a 1/6 chance of correctly choosing the right path on both floors 2 & 3 unless Loop is actively guiding them. Which is an idea I've seen people uncomfortable with, but Loop is purposefully setting them up to die anyway????), and how does Siffrin not realize sooner "hey wait this is going too long what's going to happen to my friends" and panic over that sooner, and nothing in the rest of the game really changed my thoughts on that. Considering Isabeau is right in Loop's potential sight YEAH I FEEL LIKE THEY COULD HAVE COME UP WITH DIFFERENT WAYS OF PROVING IT.

Also iiirc, in my first playthrough I'd already done the Bonnie sidequest of them freaking out at Siffrin and making them loop by this time. I get that the Bonnie sidequest is optional but like. That sure doesn't help with making this hangout feel like cheap shock value.

I think. What I would have liked better. Is if maybe Loop had been trying to do something else and they accidentally established this. Example:

Loop tells Siffrin from the very start they can tell their friends about this and brings the matter up again at act 3 start. Even though it didn't free them from the loops it DID make that one loop better for them when their friends knew something was wrong (they didn't die horribly, for one), so I think they're thinking if Stardust lets everyone in on the full truth, and sooner, maybe they can help somehow!!! Maybe Odile can solve it!!!! 'Why are us two idiots trying to solve this alone!!!' Loop's thinking, and Loop just really, really wants to get out of the loops. So like. imagine a ISAT sus run being a little more similar to a SASASA sus run and Loop specifically baiting them to do that, maybe by suggesting that since they always loop when talking to the Head Housemaiden the loop ends at a certain TIME, this is TIME craft stardust, hurry it up and maybe you'll see something useful besides the roof hm???

What Loop is hoping for: Stardust gets the nice little bit of his family comforting him and getting them to open up a little, they get to hurt themself watching it through them, Stardust realizes 'hey I should talk to my friends' and actually starts telling them about the time loop at the start so they can all work through the information together, they just needed more brain cells on the problem so THEY FIGURE OUT THE GD TIME LOOPS AND LOOP GETS TO BE FREE.

What actually happens: *looks at how the sus run goes in ISAT* also since this is already altering what a sus run requires and how it turns out you could also have Mirabelle on edge and unintentionally taking it out on Siffrin, or Isabeau being horrified if Siffrin finally confesses about the time loops under pressure from Odile and Siffrin assumes Isabeau's disgusted about him hiding this (and not realizing like. Isabeau is actually horrified that his friend's been dying? and trying to handle that alone??? SIF), basically like just make it accidentally turn into a train wreck of a scene for a takeaway of "huh. Siffrin loops back from being upset, too." And then Siffrin is further convinced opening up = always bad and just gets more and more set in I AM NOT BLINDING TELLING THEM.

#in stars and time spoilers #yeah I'm just. I WAS MEH ON THIS PART

[mioyeo]

8 makes 1 Team

No matter how different, without one of us there is no 8 makes 1 Team

Synopsis : In which 8 boys build a friendship despise of their differences with the help of a psychiatrist

Pairing : psychiatrist! Reader x Ateez (for now )

Themes : angst , mental struggles, fears , Disorders etc

Warnings : this chapter includes mentions of , angst , eating disorder , suicide , mentions of sadistic behavior , a little crying, inappropriate laughing, death , swearing , please tell me if I forgot something , and I’m not romanticizing disorders in anyway and this is pure fiction meaning this doesn’t represent Ateez in any type of way

And I would like to apologize and just like to explain that after I post the chapters of you guys getting to meet the patients (Ateez ) there will be back stories as to why they are where they are and etc , besides I do my research before writing about these disorders and other things

Word count : 1,1k

MEETING YEOSANG

𝗣𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝗻𝘂𝗺𝗯𝗲𝗿 𝟬𝟴𝟵𝟭

𝙉𝙖𝙢𝙚 : 𝙆𝙖𝙣𝙜 𝙔𝙚𝙤𝙨𝙖𝙣𝙜

𝗕𝗶𝗿𝘁𝗵𝗱𝗮𝘁𝗲 : 𝗝𝘂𝗻𝗲 𝟭𝟱, 𝟭𝟵𝟵𝟵

𝗛𝗲𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 : 𝟭,𝟳𝟯𝗺

𝗗𝗶𝘀𝗼𝗿𝗱𝗲𝗿𝘀 : 𝗔𝗻𝗼𝗿𝗲𝘅𝗶𝗮 𝗻𝗲𝗿𝘃𝗼𝘀𝗮 𝗱𝗶𝘀𝗼𝗿𝗱𝗲𝗿 , 𝗦𝗮𝗱𝗶𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗰 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹𝗶𝘁𝘆 𝗱𝗶𝘀𝗼𝗿𝗱𝗲𝗿 , misophonia

𝘋𝘪𝘴𝘤𝘭𝘢𝘪𝘮𝘦𝘳: 𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘱𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥𝘴 𝘢 𝘭𝘰𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯, 𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘶𝘭𝘵𝘴 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘰𝘳𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘰 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥 , 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥𝘴 𝘢𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 , avoid having them in a room with loud chewing sounds

She walked down the hall and entered the break room where other physiatrists sat having their breaks eating or chatting

She just sat down quietly minding her business and ate her croissant as she reviewed her next patients file so she could have a clue on how to deal with him later on

" Oh gosh , she has that bully as a patient ”

" The Kang Yeosang ?! "

" That boy is such a nightmare "

Her colleges started to rant about the young boy

" wasn't he the one that caused three people to jump from the rooftop last year ? "

" Yeah also this year 2 more took their lives because he encouraged them to "

Some of them gasped as others just avoided talking about Yeosang

" How can a 16 year old be that cruel ? "

The one woman said as she shook her head

“ He even threatened to do an acid attack last month on one of the kids because he chewed loudly ”

“ I would understand since he has misophonia ”

“ That doesn’t give that bully the right just because he is sensitive to chewing sounds ”

" Why do you guys talk about these children like that have you even thought about helping them to get better instead of gossiping about them ? "

Y/n looked fed up as everyone went silent

" Your just this calm because you haven't met him yet , he's horrible so be careful "

Everyone packed their bags and left her there alone until she decided to also leave and go towards the boys room that had a red sticker on it but that didn't mean anything to her so she just walked in seeing a black mullet haired boy that laid down swinging his legs in the air

" Not another incompetent freak to irritate me today , wait who are you ? "

" Your new physiatrist , may I know your name ? Just so I can get more comfortable talking to you if that- "

" But I don't want you to get comfortable with me , who gave you the damn permission to walk in here and demand things from me "

She chuckled and approached the boy

" So your not going to tell me your name? "

" Are you deaf ? I told you I don't want you ass-kisser to get comfortable with me "

" Do you think it's nice to call someone you just meet names ? Is it that entertaining? "

He started laughing and sat up

" They deserve it , you guys deserve to suffer and I'm all in for it to see your painful faces "

" And this reminds me of that dumb girl Soojin that jumped from the rooftop killing herself just because I called her a imbecile and told her the truth she already knew anyways "

" And what was this so called truth ? "

" That her parents don't love her and she would never get out of here , parents that are tired of their children just abandon them here "

" And do you think it was ok to do so ? Don't you know that the littlest things could push the other person to their edge or worse just like what happened to the girl ? "

" She just jumped it's not like I pushed her "

He scoffed and plopped down onto his bed

" What are you still doing here anyways? aren't you going to bawl your eyes out like the others and run out of here ? "

Y/n chuckled as she adjusted her coat

" If your going to be scared of your patients than what's the logic of working here ? "

" You've got a point , why are you working here anyway ? Don't you get tired of working for these dunce ass kids that won't get better any time sooner or better to say they won't ever ? "

" I guess you don't know why we are here than"

She chuckled and eyed the boy who suddenly sat up and looked at her confused

" If your that smart of an ass explain "

" The goal of a physiatrist is to help patients recover their functional wellbeing and to return to a healthy and functional life so until they don't reach that goal they won't leave "

" Good to know that I won't get out of here "

" And why do you think so ? "

The boy huffed sadly and closed his eyes

" I have no one waiting for me outside these depressive walls that I have to call home "

She noticed tears and a smile across his face when he suddenly started laughing

" I guess I was born to suffer all alone , how does it feel to be a loved child ? "

" I'm an orphan , they died in a attack that occurred at the supermarket a long time ago "

" Imagine going to buy something to eat and end up getting killed how pathetic"

the boy bursted out laughed loudly as he looked the elder straight in the eyes but weirdly stopped after seeing how unfazed she was about him laughing to something that probably was causing her pain but none of that was shown

" Are you finished ? was it amusing ?"

" A-A little bit , but why are you not crying or scolding me for laughing about your tragedy?"

" Because I know you couldn't help it , and I grew past the stage of getting hurt over these little things my patients do , your not the first one that did this "

She rubbed her knees and looked at the boy who just sat there looking at her

" It felt good but looking at you doesn't make it funny anymore and I don't know why "

He huffed and threw the blanket away from his body

" Do they treat you well here ? "

" No , I hate it here and than they say their here to help me get better "

" And what do you mean by that ? "

" Tha-ats none of your business "

" Listen if you feel comfortable with telling me something I'm all ears but when you don't I will just respect your choice ok ? "

" Stop acting nice it disgusts me "

The boy cursed under his breath looking away

" Well that's just how I am , I would be a hypocrite if I treated you just like they do "

She chuckled and stood up but started smiling softly after the boy spoke up

" It's Yeosang by the way "

" I see someone decided to tell me their name "

" You better appreciate it now leave "

Y/n nodded and went out smiling softly

Getting to know patient 0891 successful

#ateez #ateez angst #ateez atiny #ateez fluff #ateez hongjoong #ateez imagines #ateez mingi #ateez jongho #ateez seonghwa #ateez san #ateez yunho #ateez yeosang #yeosang #ateez wooyoung #angst #yeosang angst #angst with a happy ending

[transskywardsword]

part two of the prologue chapter for 'bovzek and the devil' a dark fairytale retelling! reminded that is this a rough draft, and i love constructive critique!

Where we left off: Claudius the VII, the King of Milan-Rosae, a fictional country in eastern Europe, ~1000AD, has become horribly lost in the great forest following a freak accident. found by a sanojuda, a type of fae, he agrees to take care of her ill child in exchange for passage home-- only to learn the boy is destined to marry into royalty. terrified that this might mean his own son, who is days away from being born, claudius plots on how to rid the world of the foul creature... (read the whole first half here!)

TWs: Claudius is a raging misogynist, including fantasizing about having sex with a woman who is not interested and objectifying her. he also really really wants to kill a baby. he graphically discusses killing a baby. it's really cruel. also attempts to drown one. the baby lives!

Claudius supposed the answer was easy enough. Babies were, as a matter of principle, not hard to kill. They were fragile, breakable, with bones that snapped as easily as spent matches and muscles that tore like wet parchment. Their skulls were thin and malleable, and a little shake or drop could end them for good. Hypothetically, it should be easy to wring the little spawn’s neck. The question was the consequence. Claudius had made a promise, and promises weren’t things easily broken, particularly when made with a fae, even if it was one as slippery as a samojuda. If the fae were to learn he planned to break their promise before it even had time to settle, well, then Claudius wouldn’t be long for this world. No, he would have to dote on the thing until the samojuda was sure it was in good hands, and could only dispose of it once the forest and its mother were far behind them. Then it was simply a matter of the right jerk of his grip and the baby’s neck would snap like eggshells underfoot.

Dawn came quickly as Claudius sorted lists of the easiest way to end an infant’s life and how he might dispose of a body without any knowledge of the crime reaching the forest. The baby cried on and off all night, an obnoxious sound that he couldn’t seem to muffle, even when he buried his head in the woman’s furs, and when the sun finally crept through the windows, Claudius was grateful. Dawn meant leaving for his home, meeting his wife, his son-- dawn meant saving a king from the thing wailing in the loft above.

“It’s a long walk,” the samojuda said, and Claudius jumped. The fae had slipped down from the loft in complete silence, despite the wailing thing in her arms, and she stood before Claudius with a look of haunting determination. “We should go.”

“Without breakfast?”

The samojuda raised a pale eyebrow, mocking in her silence.

“Fine,” Claudius grumbled, “no breakfast.”

The samojuda pulled a shawl form the box by the fire that had served as a cradle—if the spirals of wood shavings were anything to go by, it had belonged to her late beloved. She gently swaddled her baby before tucking him against her breast.

“Aren’t you going to change?” Claudius asked, and the samojuda wrinkled her brow.

“Why?”

“You—” Claudius cleared his voice. “Your breasts.”  

The samojuda glanced down at her bare chest

“Is there a problem with how I dress?” The samojuda said, her voice wry. The fabric of her skirts started just at her belly button, exposing milky skin. Her skin was unmarred, her breasts perfect, looking far softer and less pox marked than Wenzel’s own. His wife, while a true Byzantine beauty with her olive skin and dark curls, had been ill as a child and the sickness left its mark across her flesh, small divots of darker skin across her body, tainting her beauty. This woman had no such marks, not even an offensive mole or freckle. Claudius was struck suddenly by the samojuda’s  beauty. He hadn’t considered her pale starlight hair before, her wide, dark eyes, her plump figure. The lumberer must have been far darker than her lover, if the skin of their baby was anything to go by.

He could take her to bed here. Kiss her, toss the baby into the fire to burn as she writhed under him with pleasure. Surely one look at his cock would wipe away any thoughts of her stiffening lover, wherever the samojuda stashed the body. The samojuda would marvel at the size as he kissed her, moan into his mouth as he fucked her on her fire warmed furs, forget the baby as she rode him, her perfect breasts bouncing above him—

Claudius swallowed. He was a Godly man. His hand was tied with another in marriage, a wedding band on his finger. He couldn’t take another woman to bed; it would be a sin. A glorious, beautiful sin, but a sin nonetheless.

The samojuda let out a single cruel laugh and turned, caring little for her half-nakedness, and put out the fire. The coals hissed as she poured water on them, sending out puffs of steam, and the samojuda pulled a fur from the pile by the fire and wrapped it around her shoulders, covering the beautiful skin there. Claudius found himself disappointed.

It was for the best, he supposed. This way, if he was seen, it wouldn’t appear like he’d been fooling around with some whore in the woods. The samojuda slipped out the front door of the hut, waving Claudius on, and left it ajar as they walked from the clearing, deep into the woods. Claudius looked over his shoulder once, and then the trees were too dense to make out hide or hare of the little shack.

“Worried I’ll lead you astray?” The samojuda said, a hint of humor in her voice as they continued deeper and deeper into the Šumava.

“Now I am,” Claudius said in reply, and the samojuda laughed. It sounded like bells and clinking pearls, and struck Claudius with a strange fear. This woman could lead him astray, deeper and deeper into his beloved Šumava, feast on him and feed him to her dying babe.

Would she?

“You know what I am,” the samojuda said, “I am no will of the wisp. I’d much rather take the baby from your wife’s belly than lead you into the darkness.”

Claudius froze. “My wife—”

“I can smell her on you. She loves you dearly, you know. You don’t deserve her.”

“Excuse me?”

“I steal babies, replace them, and drown them in my well. I am a simple creature, I act as is my nature. Do you not as well?”

Claudius felt a sudden fear creep into his gut. This woman, this creature, wasn’t bound to human morals. Samojuda were crafty fae, nymph-like with a love for standing water, who lay in wait to steal infants one day and thrust changelings upon wonton women the next. Would she follow him to his home, take his heir from him?

She knew of his wife; could she smell his desire as well?

A new thought chilled him. Could she smell his plan to murder her baby now, before he’d even finished it?

Instead of devouring him, instead of flashing sharp teeth and leading him to a pond to drown him, the samojuda simply turned her back with a scoff and continued onwards, clutching her baby to her breast.

The baby. It all came back to the baby.

Claudius followed the samojuda as the sun rose, the sky going from black to rosy pink to blue. The sunrise was beautiful, even when filtering through the forest’s thick canopy. The samojuda hummed a melancholy mourning song to the baby in her arms, and the forest buzzed around her, the birds and insects seeming to have gathered to say ‘farewell’ to their half-blooded child.

Claudius’ feet ached by the time they reached the far end of the forest. Claudius’ heart pounded from the uphill hike, his feel pulsing in his boots, and he signed with relief as the farmlands of Milan-Rosae came into view. Fed by the Vydra, the agricultural circles around the walls of the capital city flourished; Milan-Rosae might be a small kingdom, but its capital, Abisa, was a grand, gilded thing of beauty. Surrounded by small villages and farmland that provided it with food, the three walls of Abisa served as mighty protectors—one along the outskirts of the city, one along the edge of the merchantry district, and a final that circled the moat of the castle. Perched on the peek of the many sprawling hills that surrounded the city, Claudius’ home was the crown upon the jewels over his capital. While he had manors and palaces throughout Milan-Rosae, the Abisali Court was a castle, unlike anything those east of the Rhine had ever seen. It towered, its many spires resembled the spikes of a dragon, its stained glass windows and bejeweled stone like rainbows dragged down from the sky and inlaid in the earth. Statues of the saints stood in attention beside carvings of folklore and fae, a sight that would petrify the Pope but reminded the people of Milan-Rosae of the glory of their beloved forest and river.

It was, in short, beautiful.

“Do we part here?” Claudius asked, turning to the samojuda. The woman sank back into the shadows of the trees.

“I…”

“Well? We had a deal, didn’t we?”

The samojuda’s face fell. She glanced to him, then down to the baby in her arms and adjusted it softly. She pressed her forehead to its bare chest.

“Give me just a moment more,” she said softly. Tears bubbled up in her dark eyes. The baby, as foul as it was, shared the same otherworldly eyes, wide and black and glittering, and for the first time all morning it began to cry again, a pathetic hiccupping sound.  

“You had all morning,” Claudius snapped, wrenching the baby from her arms with careless aggression. The samojuda cried out, lunging for her baby, and Claudius stepped to the side.

“His neck,” The creature sobbed, “oh, don’t forget his neck—”

“I’ll hold him as I well please.”

The samojuda’s eyes went wide. “Oh by the Earth, what have I done?” she whispered, and Claudius huffed.

“Given him a new chance in life,” he said, and he couldn’t help the smile that slipped onto his face, picturing the broken child, lifeless and unbaptized, left to rot mere hours from now.

“You… you’ll bring him to visit, yes?” She said, voice wavering. She had to know the answer already, stupid woman. “Every few months, at this spot? Or on his birthday, or, or even less often—just bring him. Let me know he lives and is happy.”

 “That is not up to me,” Claudius lied. Tears dripped down the creature’s face in time with her child.

“But, you—”

“I promised a breast to feed him, nothing more.”

The samojuda sank to her knees. She wiped the mud from Claudius’ boots with her shining hair, and the man kicked her aside. Objectively, it was unwise to anger a fae, but in that moment, the samojuda wasn’t a strong, terrifying creature of nature; she was a woman, sniveling and pathetic as any other woman.

Claudius adjusted the babe in his arms and turned on his heels to the sprawling farmland of his city, the beautiful stone walls just a few miles away.

“Please—” The woman behind him hiccupped, but Claudius paid her no mind. Behind him, he heard the samojuda rise to her feet, trembling, and call out to him.

“I shall see him again! I swear it! And should a hair on his head be harmed, I swear on this forest that you shall never no peace!”

Claudius could have laughed. Instead, he turned back to the thing's mother, moved the little baby’s too-thin wrist into a final wave, and then moved farther away from the trees, content to leave them behind.

The trees were but a green garden snake on the skyline soon enough. The Great Otter splintered into channels that provided his lovely lands with fresh water and irrigation, and the sound of the rushing water was pleasant in the mid-morning, far more so than the screeches of the soon-to-be-dead baby. The question was simply, how. How to dispose of the baby?

Claudius pondered this as he followed the river to the first signs of life in the villages surrounding the capital. He had to get rid of it quickly before anyone saw him, and then he could pay someone to take him to his castle and greet his wife with the stories of the most horrid day he’d had.

Though he wouldn’t mention the baby to her. No one needed to know of the infant and its death. That knowledge would die with it.

He came across a sawmill with a grand waterwheel at the edge of a small town, close enough to the walls to be time to rid himself of the thing. Claudius scanned the scenery around him. It would be easy to wring the neck, but he had no desire to dig a grave. Did the peasants here even bury their dead? Could he just leave it in the streets?

Suddenly, his eyes fell upon a pretty little well, well built with mud and stone, with a pretty little bucket and crank. It seemed to Claudius the prettiest little peasant thing he’d ever seen. What had that fae creature said to him?

“I steal babies, replace them, and drown them in my well. I am a simple creature, I act as is my nature. Do you not as well?”

Well, here was a well. Was it in Claudius’ nature to kill a baby?

It was in his nature to protect his son.

Claudius rolled his shoulders, walked to the well, and peered over the edge. The water seemed bottomless. Good.

Without giving himself the time to second guess his decision, Claudius took hold of the creature’s foot and dropped it over the edge. It landed in the water with a ‘plop!’ and its cries were silenced.

Claudius turned, and walked east to another farm home in search of a horse. The deed was done.

His son was safe.

*

The cathedral bells were ringing when King Claudius the VII of Milan-Rosae arrived at Abisali Court at the top of the hill in the center of Abisa. While Claudius had been gone, finally found by his closest knights and vassals who’d torn apart the countryside and forest alike in search of him, his wife had gone into an easy, short labor, and given birth to a beautiful heir, with skin as pale as his fathers, hair as dark and curled as his mother, and the dark eyes of them both. His cries were quiet, mournful, almost lonely, and as she took him to her breast, Wenzel found a strange sadness in her heart. She’d hoped the overflowing of love she’d feel upon seeing little Alois’ face would make up for the apathy of her husband, but as she looked upon his nose, which would one day be handsome and large, and squeezed his little hands, she saw a future of cruelty before him and couldn’t bring herself to care.

“You will know great hardship,” She whispered to the baby, “what a pity.”

“As all kings do,” said a lady in waiting. “Chin up, my lady! He is healthy and beautiful, and we should all be glad.”

Claudius marveled at the baby his wife presented to him, at his little toes and wide eyes, and instantly the samojuda and her creature was forgotten. After all, who needed to think of such things when the most perfect child in the world was before him? A child who would fight wars for him, beat down the opposition, rule in a way that would make his father proud.

Claudius declared the day a day of celebration, but it wasn’t just the royals celebrating. For outside the capital gates, at a certain mill house, a little girl was fetching water.

Rosalin the Miller’s daughter was seven and a half, and bitterly hated her chores. She’d much rather be in town, watching the world go by, than do the mundane jobs her mother gave her.

Rosalin reached for the crank, only to hear horrid gasping and thrashing.

“Just some dumb bird,” she muttered to herself, “who fell in and forgot how to fly. Poor thing.”

She stood on her tiptoes and looked over the edge, then screamed.

It was a baby.

Tangled in the rope for the bucket, the infant had light brown skin discolored from freezing water and the tension of the rope. Rosalin leaned over the edge and scooped him up, screaming for her father. Jon came running, thinking some wolf might have left the forest for a snack, a shovel in hand, and nearly dropped it at the sight of the infant in his daughter’s hands, not even a week old.

“Fetch the healer,” Jon said, voice firm, and began to pump the water from the baby’s chest. Keeping his arm straight, he placed two fingers in the center of their chest, pushed and breathed and breathed and pushed until the baby began to cry.

Now Jon had seen many starving babies in his time; a harvest was never a guarantee. And looking upon this child, he knew he hadn’t eaten once before his mother had so cruelly disposed of it. Jon scooped up the baby, grabbing the shawl he had been wrapped in without a thought, and ran to the main house.

Joshaline had been months along when God took their baby from them, far enough along to produce milk, and her breasts still carried the lingering soreness of milk left to sour inside her, Josha too heartbroken to milk herself. Which meant, God have mercy, she could feed the poor thing.

And feed him she did. While the royals honored the prince's birth, Jon, Josha, and Rosalin, the Miller family, with their forest facing well, celebrated as the baby lasted through the night, then the week, fed by Josha and beloved by them all.

“What will you name him, Mama?” Rosalin asked each night, and each night Josha shushed her, unsure if she had the right to love a baby that was not hers.

“God takes and gives, beloved,” Jon said to his wife. “He may have taken our own little one, but He has gifted us with the chance to save the life of another. Name him. Make him ours.”

“Bovzek,” Josha said softly, and the two other members of the Miller household held their breath as the woman of the house spoke. “I shall name him Bovzek. God’s Gift.”

#batd tag #my writing

[darkfictionjude]

Hey Jude! You know you rock!

I'm overthrowing shit again so here goes. I feel iffy af about romancing Lorcan. No hate to people who want to do his route.. I low-key clocked it myself but the more i think about it the more i get sketched out. So personal preference no hate all that jazz.

like he is basically obsessed with MCs dead sister who he was dating and she was a horrible bitch. I've never had writing who made me dislike a person more in my life so quickly. You are that good.

So all these dynamics come into play. MC being a replacement in the eyes of others, all that stupid guilty feelings of betrayal he's gonna have.. my MC hopefully wouldn't because his sister sucked and he owes he absolutely fucking nothingness. So it's angsty as hell. I know I'm rambling stay with me . Sorry.

But my constant thought is just Orla was a bully. Everyone knew that. Her cruelty I can't speak on yet and only you would know but I imagine she was up there with the worst of them. Especially from MCs initial coming home scene where the option to feel fear when walking past her room stuck with me. So did Lorcan partake in her cruelty? Or did he know about it and just watched? Just pretended it wasn't happening? Bullying by association is just as bad to me.

And I know alot of people in this IF are assholes family especially except Sally for not stopping it but for Lorcan approach MC the way he did by cornering them basically knowing what he knew and them just coming back home to be interrogated by them about a whole BULLY shows so little fucking care it's annoying to me.

As someone who had an Orla in her life I just can't seperate them if that's the case. If he did know what and how she was to our MC. That party scene pisses me off because how fucking dare he! And if he was a participant in her torture of MC then to me him and just stood around him and Orla are basically one and the same and that just deads his route for me entirely. I wouldn't be able to believe in his care for MC at all because he would lack decent compassion for me. Atleast Imre and Nia vocalize their displeasure with how Orla was romancing someone that will then tell you they love you.. who also loved someone who practically made your life a living hell makes me feel itchy.

Again no hate on the Lorcan romancer or you just my rambling because this story is burning through my brain.

Love the rambles, love the players insight.

That’s why I made sure there were three ROs and that they were all different and had different interactions with mc before the beginning of the story so that you can feel free to chose who you want. I do see why some people wouldn’t want to date him, understandable.

Now the thing with Orla is that even though she knew Lorcan didn’t like mc she kept the real abusive stuff in private. Like with Lorcan she would at most call mc names cruel names but that’s as far as it went in front of him. The real verbal abuse happened in the house when orla would catch mc alone. And it all has to do with that self image, a perfect girl isn’t never makes a spectacle out of herself in public, a perfect girl never shows how their sibling someone so insignificant (in her eyes) could get under her, THE orla crown’s skin.

The most Orla ever did in public was sometimes shoulder mc out of the way at school or tell her friends when mc wasn’t there how much of a freak they were. And that’s typical of abusers isn’t it? They show a better image to the world and then show you who they are when the door is closed.

If she had been worse in front of Lorcan I don’t know what his reaction would be because he doesn’t know it and that will probably be something that haunts if you chose his route or not

thank you for the compliments 💜

#anon asks #orla #mc crown #we wretched creatures

[kazscrows]

Six of Crows Reread🪶

Chapter 45: Kaz

The deal is the deal

Unfortunately everyone is a bloody liar

Why had he believed Van Eck had the blessing of the Merchant Council? Because he was a rich, upstanding mercher? Because he’d dressed his own servants and soldiers in the purple uniforms of the stadwatch? Kaz had met with Van Eck in a quarantined mercher’s house, not a government building, but he’d been taken in by a little set dressing. It was Hertzoon and his coffeehouse all over again, only now Kaz was old enough to know better.

Ouch

“Chaos will come, and I will be its master. Its very wealthy master.”

Could’ve been a banger of a line if it wasn’t from Van Eck

The little freak

Oh look we finally get to learn just how horrible a father he is

Van Eck began to laugh – a warm, almost jovial chuckle, but its edges were jagged and bitter.

“Let me tell you about my son.” He spat the word as if it were poison on his lips. “He was meant to be heir to one of the greatest fortunes in all of Kerch, an empire with shipping lines that reach all over the globe, one built by my father, and my father’s father. But my son, the boy meant to rule this grand empire, cannot do what a child of seven years can. He can solve an equation. He can paint and play the flute most prettily. What my son cannot do, Mister Brekker, is read. He cannot write. I have hired the best tutors from every corner of the world. I’ve tried specialists, tonics, beatings, hypnotism. But he refused to be taught. I finally had to accept that Ghezen saw fit to curse me with a moron for a child. Wylan is a boy who will never grow to be a man. He is a disgrace to my house.”

“The letters …” said Jesper, and Kaz could see the anger in his face. “You weren’t pleading with him to come back. You were mocking him.”

I volunteer to punch Jan Van Eck in the face!!

After Jesper and Wylan get the first swings in of course

Leverage number one doesn’t work out quite like Kaz had imagined

But of course he has a backup plan

If you’re reading this, then you know how much I wish to have you home. Every letter had been a slap in the face to Wylan, a kind of cruel joke.

“He’s your son,” Jesper said.

“No, he is a mistake. One soon to be corrected.”

So so cruel

Doesn’t he have any love inside of him?

“You’re the fool,” Jesper snarled. “He’s smarter than most of us put together, and he deserves a better father than you.”

YEAH YOU TELL HIM JESPER!!

The Tidemakers didn’t hesitate. Before anyone could draw breath to protest, two huge walls of water rose and shot towards the Ferolind. They crushed the ship between them with a resonant boom, sending debris flying.

Jesper screamed in rage and raised his guns.

“Jesper!” Kaz commanded. “Stand down!”

“He killed them,” Jesper said, face contorted. “He killed Wylan and Nina!”

Poor Jesper…

This scene will be so intense in the spin-off

Please

I need it—

Jesper looked back at the rocking waves, at the broken bits of mast and torn sail where a ship had been only seconds before. “I don’t … I don’t understand.”

“I confess to being a bit shocked, too, Mister Brekker,” said Van Eck. “No tears? No righteous protests for your lost crew? They raise you cold in the Barrel.”

“Cold and cautious,” said Kaz.

Even more cautious than you realize

I can’t remember my initial reaction to this part exactly but I’m pretty sure I figured Kaz would have tricks up his sleeve

Like there was no way Nina and “Wylan” were killed off after everything and with only a chapter to go

Plus I knew there was a second book

“I don’t need to take him from you. You never had him. That’s not Kuwei Yul-Bo.”

“A sorry bluff at best.”

“I’m not big on bluffing, am I, Inej?”

“Not as a rule.”

Van Eck’s lip curled. “And why is that?”

“Because he’d rather cheat,” said the boy who was not Kuwei Yul-Bo in perfect, unaccented Kerch.

Van Eck startled at the sound of his voice, and Jesper flinched.

The Shu boy held out a hand. “Pay up, Kaz.”

Kaz sighed. “I do hate to lose a wager. You see, Van Eck, Wylan bet me that you would have no qualms about ending his life. Call me sentimental, but I didn’t believe a father could be so callous.”

Please I forget they literally bet on this 😂😭😭

Also the fact that Kaz asked Inej and the fact that she knows he actually is big on bluffing

He trusts her so much!

She knows all his secrets

And she’ll never betray him

I mean he uses this trick at least three times in this series

Bluffing/lying/cheating to scare someone is Kaz’s favorite tactic

Oh… oh but this makes Jesper flinching at the reveal super painful

Kaz trusted Inej to know about Wylan and Kuwei swapping places, but he didn’t trust Jesper….

He probably did it to get a genuine reaction from Jesper as well but the trust issue thing is definitely there too

Kaz could see the fear and hurt in his golden eyes – Wylan’s surprising courage, too.

After the battle in the Djerholm harbour, the merchling had come to Kaz to warn him that he couldn’t be used as leverage against his father. Wylan had been red-faced, barely able to speak the words of his supposed ‘affliction’. Kaz had only shrugged. Some men were poets. Some were farmers. Some were rich merchers. Wylan could draw a perfect elevation. He’d made a drill that could cut through Grisha glass from parts of a gate and scavenged bits of jewellery. So what if he couldn’t read?”

It’s been said before but I’ll say it again

It’s really beautiful how Kaz doesn’t judge others on their flaws

“There could be no judgment from a boy known as Dirtyhands” -chapter 20

He looks for the best part of every individual and makes that part of them shine

Or he finds some way for them to be useful at least

Kaz shrugged. “Kill us, and you’ll never find Kuwei.”

Van Eck appeared to consider this. Then he stepped back. “Guards to me!” he shouted. “Kill everyone but Brekker!”

Kaz knew the instant he made his mistake. They’d all known it might come to this. He should have trusted his crew. His eyes should have stayed trained on Van Eck. Instead, in that moment of threat, when he should have thought only of the fight, he looked at Inej.

This line oh my gosh—

KaNej—

And Van Eck saw it. He blew on his whistle. “Leave the others! Get the money and the girl.”

Do you hear that?

No?

Well it’s me screaming

He tries to run to protect her!!

Please I am SOBBING 😭

“The Tidemakers reached her first, vanishing into mist, then reappearing at her side. But only a fool would to try to take Inej in close combat. The Tidemakers were fast – vanishing and reappearing, grabbing at her. But she was the Wraith, and her knives found heart, throat, spleen. Blood spilled over the sand as the Tidemakers collapsed in two very solid heaps.

She’s so cool

Oh my gosh

they had to face the sun to shoot and not even Jesper could aim blind.

Hmm.. this is interesting

I don’t think the show follows this statement

Jesper has literally shot without looking several times

The Squaller barrelled into Inej and sped upwards with her into the sky.

Stay still, Kaz urged her silently, his pistol drawn.

Something about Kaz with a gun just make me so…

So…. Hnnnnnnngh

It’s hot, okay?

AND THEN SHE’S FALLING

AND HE TRIES TO RUN TO HER AGAIN!!

Ashjfssfhjvsadh—

A third Squaller swooped down, snatching her up seconds before impact and dealing her a vicious blow to the skull. Kaz saw Inej’s body go limp.

“Bring him down!” roared Matthias.

“No!” shouted Kaz. “Shoot him and she falls, too!”

He can’t watch her fall…

It terrifies him

…. “Why the net, Kaz?”

Some hints for later I see??

But now she’s gone-

There was nothing they could do but stand there like fools and watch her shape get smaller in the sky – a distant moon, a fading star, then gone.

There and then gone…

Just like the magic trick

Just like Jordie..

But he can get her back!

Vengeance for Jordie, all Kaz had worked for, was slipping away. He didn’t care…

…“Kaz, I can make the shot,” said Jesper, rifle to his shoulder. “Van Eck is still in range.”

And all would be lost – Inej, the money, everything.

“No,” Kaz said. “Let them go.”

Inej is his first thought

He values her more than his revenge

He felt as he had looking into the darkened windows of the house on Zelverstraat. Helpless once more. He’d prayed to the wrong god.

It hurts 😭

Kaz marvelled at his own stupidity. Dumber than a pigeon fresh off the boat and looking to make a fortune on East Stave. His greatest vulnerability had been right beside him. And now she was gone.

Poor Kaz

He’s so hard on himself

Love isn’t a weakness!!

😭😭😭

The idea of “there and then gone” keeps coming up though and I love and hate it!

“That’s why you disappeared during the journey,” said Jesper. “You weren’t helping Matthias care for Nina. You were hiding.”

“I didn’t hide.”

“You … how many times was it you standing beside me on the deck at night when I thought it was Kuwei?”

“Every time.”

“Nina might not be able to put you back, you know. Not without another dose of parem. You could be stuck like this.”

“Why does it matter?”

“I don’t know!” Jesper said angrily. “Maybe I liked your stupid face.”

See I told you it was Wylan

I say this like I haven’t read these books like five times already

I’m actually here for angry Jesper??

I want more strong emotions from him in the show

He turned to Matthias. “You knew. Wylan knew. Inej knew. Everyone but me.”

“Ask me why, Jesper,” Kaz said, his patience at an end.

Here comes pain

It hurts because it was an accident

Jesper would never willfully betray the other crows

This echos the opening scene of the book with Big Bolliger a little

Just this time the betrayal wasn’t on purpose

“You told one of the Dime Lions you were leaving Kerch, but that you’d be coming into big money, didn’t you?”

Jesper swallowed. “I had to. They were leaning on me hard. My father’s farm—”

“I told you not to tell anyone you were leaving the country. I warned you to keep your mouth shut.”

“I didn’t have a choice! You had me locked up in the Crow Club before we left. If you’d let me—”

Kaz turned on him. “Let you what? Play a few hands of Three Man Bramble? Dig yourself deeper in with every boss in the Barrel stupid enough to extend you credit? You told a member of Pekka’s gang you were about to be flush.”

“I didn’t know he’d go to Pekka. Or that Pekka knew about parem. I was just trying to buy myself some time.”

“Saints, Jesper, you really haven’t learned anything in the Dregs, have you? You’re still the same dumb farm boy who stepped off the boat.”

Is he talking about Jesper here or himself…

Hmmmmmmmm…?

“Kaz would always remember that moment, when he’d seen greed take hold of his brother, an invisible hand guiding him onward, the lever at work.”

Remember that quote from chapter 18?

Yeah.

Kaz is definitely thinking about Jordie when he looks at Jesper and his gambling problem

Jesper lunged for him, and Kaz felt a surge of giddy violence. Finally, a fight he could win. But Matthias stepped between them, holding them each back with a massive hand. “Stop. Stop this.”Kaz didn’t want to stop. He wanted to beat them all bloody and then brawl his way through the Barrel.

This man does have a tendency to get into fights a lot

He’s always coming back bloody during their heists and schemes

Anyways-

They’re so brothers

Kaz wants to see Jesper as his big brother but he keeps letting him down…

Just like Jordie did—

For now, there was nothing but the flat grey of the sky and the dead rock of this miserable excuse for an island. And Inej’s absence. Kaz wanted to hit someone. He wanted someone to hit him.

I’m sure Jesper would happily deck you if you let him

If Kaz was their leader, then Inej had been their lodestone, pulling them together when they seemed most likely to drift apart.

I love this comparison

Inej holds them all together!!

According to that deleted scene we got today she’s their heart!! 💕

Nina had disguised Kaz’s crow-and-cup tattoo before they’d entered the Ice Court, but he hadn’t let her near the R on his bicep. Now he touched his gloved fingers to where the sleeve of his coat covered that mark. Without meaning to, he’d let Kaz Rietveld return.

He didn’t know if it had begun with Inej’s injury or that hideous ride in the prison wagon, but somehow he’d let it happen and it had cost him dearly.

I think he started coming back even sooner than that…

I want him to let Rietveld free but at least he’s making a plan

Also give us Kaz’s tattoos netflix!!!!

“Scheming face,” murmured Jesper.

“Definitely,” agreed Wylan.

Matthias folded his arms. “Digging in your bag of tricks, demjin?”

I love it

Kaz wants to go after Inej alone!

But he knows he’ll need help

“I’ll need the right crew.”

“Wylan got to his feet. “For the Wraith.”

Jesper followed, still not meeting Kaz’s eyes. “For Inej,” he said quietly.

Matthias gave a single sharp nod.

They all love Inej so much 🥹

Inej had wanted Kaz to become someone else, a better person, a gentler thief. But that boy had no place here. That boy ended up starving in an alley. He ended up dead. That boy couldn’t get her back.

No!

He can survive now!!

He has friends! A family!!!

Though… I guess he does need Dirtyhands Brekker for what comes next..

I’m going to get my money, Kaz vowed. And I’m going to get my girl.

YEAH YOU ARE

THAT’S MY MAN!!!

WRECK HIS PLANS—

Inej could never be his, not really, but he would find a way to give her the freedom he’d promised her so long ago.

He really loves her

Enough to let her go 🥹

It’s heartbreaking

Dirtyhands had come to see the rough work done.

Aaaannnd that wraps it for the Crows! Just Pekka’s chapter left!!

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#here we go! I’m finally posting!! #gosh it’s so long #was this the longest one yet? #I really really love this chapter though #it’s just so good!! #six of crows #shadow and bone #kaz brekker #inej ghafa #kanej #nina zenik #matthias helvar appreciation #wylan van eck #jesper fahey #grishaverse #shadow and bone netflix #soc #books #reading #leigh bargudo #kazscrows #kazscrowsreadssoc