#I guess I needed the reminder but god | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

chaoticeddie · 3 months

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feeling legit sick to my stomach

#security guard just came into the office all excited about whoever the other republican primary option was dropping out of the race #opening the republican candidate to just 'president trump'#and like. I knew this guy would be a trump supporter #he's a cop #but I usually don't have to hear about it #I sit in the office at my computer and he sits at the front desk #I guess I needed the reminder but god #read the fucking room man #you're saying that to someone that is VISIBLY a lesbian #I have been told that it's quite obvious #so like. get the fuck out of here with your yay trump shit #so. good reminder i guess. just hate to hear it explicitly said

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des-fangirl · 2 months

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attention please in werewolf au Vimes & Angua are even COOLER!!!

#i love their dynamic in books i want more of it now that they are both 'dogs' not just figuratively #AMD NOW VIMES HAS A GOOD REASON TO DISLIKE VAMPIRES!!!#wooo #OO OO I REMEMBERED AN IDEA TOO #so #fifth elephant & they meet Angua's family you know #BUT THIS TIME VIMES LIKE HE CAN BE EVEN ANGRIER??#LIKE BRO IM A WEREWOLF TOO WTF ARE YOU DOING YOU'RE A BITCH (<-Vimes to Angua's brother)#they can mock him for being from a disgraced werewolf family #DO YOU THINK HE'LL BE ABLE TO SAY 'BATH' AND EVERYTHING STILL #like he's been hiding for so long and REPRESSING THAT BEAST IN HIM OMG THAT FITS #so he's more human that wolf now #more like a dog really...#ofc he can say 'Vetinari' he does that like. everyday #I WONDER IF IN THIS AU HE GETS REMINDED OF STONEFACE TOO #like “ahahah remember that one your ancestor? the werewolf that killed the king #yeeea thank god you're not a werewolf. but you're still a bitch just like him tho“#nah that'd be soo sus like wait what if you ARE a werewolf...#now that i think about it i think there'll be a moment when he doesn't have to hide that anymore? i guess?#but when #MAGPIESKETCHINS CMERE #need your thoughts but too shy to likee askk #des-shitpost #discworld #discworldwerewolf au #A TAG!!!

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imminent-danger-came · 4 months

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The 1x00 AHiB -> 4x06 glowup

#this just reminded me I need to make a ''being there for your friends when they need you'' post #because that shit is EVERYWHERE #LIKE THAT'S ALL THEY FUCKING TALK ABOUT #''It's okay sandy! You're always there for us when we need you. The least we can do is be there for you when you need us.'' (4x06)#''No! Mei is my best friend. I'd never abandon her when she needs me—we're heroes! It's what we do!'' (3x10)#''You don't know! We'd risk it for sure! I won't abandon them when they need us'' (4x02)#''As long as I'm doing something to help out a friend- I don't mind what it is! I just want to be there for 'em when they need me.'' (2x08)#''Wukong only values people by how useful they are to him'' (3x08)#''No no honestly—this is exactly what I need right now. I'm trapped under a mountain- but the 6-earred macaque brought me a peach!''#(4x11)#Literally just the shit off of the top of my head #and then. And then that in contrast with #''I get it. I'd do anything for my friends! But at the cost of the world?'' LIKE GOD DAMMIT LEGOS #You took the basic bitch ''Help you friends'' theme and went ''But what if helping your friend hurt others'' like come on man #Hello #Where am I #I'm dying. I'm dying #Okay imma go do hw......I guess....whatever....#lmk #lego monkie kid #lmk parallels #lmk Sandy #lmk Mei #lmk Pigsy #lmk Tang #OH GOD ALSO. ''I will become someone they can depend on...the way I can always depend on them!'' (3x08)#AND #''But you're always there when I need you- so it's time for me to return the favor!'' (2x04)#Which also just ties into ''we'll figure this out together'' as a whole right #what. ever.

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girl-bateman · 7 months

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How does one get assigned as sam coded / dean coded ? Do I need a doctors note ? A psych evaluation perhaps ?

#i keep going back and forth on it #bc i used to identify with dean for the longest time bc i was so repressed and emotionally closed off (+older sister)#and at that point id spent my youth very purposefully protecting my younger sibling from our dad #and i guess in my brain i paralleled that with dean staying behind with john while sam took off for stanford #and dean protecting sam from knowing too much abt the supernatural #BUT having grown up ive now become the one resentful and angry at our father while my sister protects him #and our fights remind me a lot of scenes from the show where im obviously identifying a lot stronger with sam #plus the whole thing abt being the families designated academic or whatever #while also feeling cursed from the minute i was born and crushing at the guilt of everything wrong with me #and trying to be a good person and saving others to make for the fact that i feel an intrinsic evilness about myself #so like... yeah sam is very very relatable too in that sense #bc he also has that hope in him- the belief in god. in angels. in goodness. and i have that too !#im just also a miserable cynic at the same time :)#so ????#i havent been in the fandom for long enough to know the full requirements of being a sam or dean girl #(and by that i mean i havent been in the fandom for long AFTER i rejoined from my 10 year hiatus)#i literally would love to read someones page long explanation of what sam coded vs dean coded entails #someone with a spn hyperfixation or special interest needs to provide me with the goods fr 😭#spn

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quietwingsinthesky · 8 months

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I guess I can't really get behind cas saving dean from hell as a destiel win, or lines like 'you don't think you deserve to be saved', because. this is not a point at which cas is doing because he believes dean is good and loves him or anything but. he saves dean because that's heaven's will. when he reminds dean that cas, and heaven, are who saved him in early s4, it's not him really saying 'you're a good man', it's a debt that he is using, pretty explicitly, to get dean to do what heaven wants. even the handprint reads like... ownership, in a way.

cas is complicit in heaven's manipulation of dean after he's pulled out of hell. that's what makes his rebellion later powerful, because this is an angel who believes in heaven so strongly that he will look into the eyes of the righteous man he saved and tell him that if he doesn't do what he's told, he will throw dean back into hell.

#this is not an anti-cas post to be clear. or even really anti-destiel?#it's just kind of weird that this is all portrayed so romantically when like. that's not how it is in the show.#castiel marks dean because heaven owns his ass. not because he loves him. dean is a tool to them. engraved.#this is a personal thing anyway #i like this about their relationship. i think its more impactful for cas to view dean the same way heaven does at first. as a sword.#and then to learn more about him and to realize that he should trust him over heaven.#rather than him being dtf from the get-go #also because hgnnn dehumanization brain go brrrrr. to get pulled out of hell and for your savior to look at you as a dog that needs to have #his chain yanked and reminded he can be sent back to the pound if he bites #i take it back cas saving dean from hell is a destiel thing in the way that it is cas collaring dean for heaven's use and realizing that #maybe he wants dean collared for his own use deep down. cas who hasn't interacted with anyone but other angels in centuries.#who has lost so many of his siblings to save this one man. who has no real control over what he is ordered to carry out.#looking at dean like. but i can control him. he will obey me. i can be his private god.#yeah its destiel like that i guess #destiel #spn #dean winchester #castiel

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spacedlexi · 1 year

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is anybody else out there still creating twdg fanworks 😭📢 where is everyone please dont say reddit i cant go back there

#im gods bravest little soldier for following fandom tags but its rough in there #guess i should specifically say where are the twdg fans who didnt hate violet #sometimes i remember how homophobic (and racist?? in the lee and clem game??) people were during s4 (and still are on reddit/yt) and think:#maybe i should stop looking and just let the cool people find me #go knocking on enough doors and the devil may answer #but i want to see fanart 🥺#was only Slightly surprised by the misogyny because this is clems game series but hoo boy the misogyny towards violet......#ive gotten used to how quiet it is i gotta remind myself a dead fandom is better than an annoying one 💀burning shores reminded me of that #so hard being a wlw in video game spaces please where are my other wlw video game enjoyers i need to find u 😭#gotta draw some more ellie to lure them in like an angler fish #im honestly surprised how dead twdg seems to be esp with the way the final season ended?? its set up so well for fanworks??#theres a lot of unaccounted for time even before clem got to the school. and its set up that their lives could be anything now #is it just because people were burned so hard by seasons 2 and 3 that a lot of people just didnt even play 4??#or maybe they didnt even know s4 was un-cancelled??#because i know theres a lot of people who stopped after 3 #but 4 is such a return to form. its like the other side of the coin to s1 for me. like if s1 was more hopeful instead of dreadful #it is Such a love letter to s1 honestly. imagine if telltale didnt shut down in the middle of production and they got a full budget.....#sometimes i imagine it... s4 with a full 5 episodes??? in my dreams. literally.#oof this turned into a ramble im just fandom lonely #twdg #it speaks

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nostalgia-tblr · 1 year

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For anyone keeping track (no one), I have started watching the first Avengers film (MCU not the 60s TV show) but only while eating lunch so it's gonna take a while. So far Nick Fury has been assembling the Avengers (the film was initially released in the UK as Avengers Assemble - because of that 60s TV show - but it's not called that on D+ so I'm calling it what the Americans called it, just FYI) even though there's not yet anything for them to avenge as That Suit Guy (j/k I know his name too!!) isn't dead yet, and now they're on THE FUCKING VALIANT FROM DR WHO and I assume we're gonna continue assembling for a while as they're not all there yet.

MEANWHILE Loki (who is neither an alligator nor a woman in this???) is in a SECRET UNDERGROUND LAIR with a bunch of his stans who are... idk something technobabble that involves irridium and anti-protons. He is there looking for the tesseract on behalf of ???? who I know will be revealed 47 films from now as... no, wait, it wasn't, was it? That was just announced on a website or something? So it could be LITERALLY ANYONE. The Avengers (in-progress) also seem to be after that thing, but I have already forgotten why everyone is wanting it, assuming it was mentioned (it probably was).

Thor hasn't shown up yet, but Arrows Hawkeye is working as a Loki Stan and there's Steve Rogers and THE HULK and The Only Woman One, whose power is that she's a Cold War assassin (??) and I think this one is the film where she gets called a cunt (!) and honestly I am not sure which of the men she's getting officially shipped with, I think Arrows Hawkeye though? Fairly sure, as the alternative is that a man and a woman like each other as people but not in a lusty way, which would never happen obviously. (Hey I may ship mostly het* pairings but I don't always like it!)

Based on the Valiant (if u don't know who she is get da hell out of here!) I am guessing that the film ends with Loki dying in Thor's arms romantically but then I remembered that I know it can't because one of Loki got kidnapped from... either the end of this film or the start of the next one or POSSIBLY just from a later film's time-travel bit (???) but like... maybe they've edited this film secretly and I was right after all? But nobody else has watched it on Disney + recently so nobody knows yet? IT COULD HAPPEN.

Not sure what to make of this film so far, a lot's been going on yet also not much has been going on, and the one I like best so far (Suit Guy) is gonna die (NOT EVEN IN THOR'S ARMS ROMANTICALLY) and god Iron Man really hasn't aged well now that we have that one tech billionaire being a twat in public all the time to remind us what such people tend to be like. WHERE IS THOR????

*I say het but everyone in everything is bisexual, I know this because I thought of it and announced it on tumblr and will now say "I don't make the rules" to make it an objective FACT. I don't make the rules!!!

#the avengers (mcu edition not the 60s one)#(though if u close one eye and tilt ur head the black widow looks a wee bit like emma peel maybe?)#i like to think the lair of loki stans exists after this to post angrily on social media about how actually he did nothing wrong etc etc #let me know if loki's just working from a subway station that's still in use in this that'd be hilarious he'd be so annoyed by it all #torn on the tortured-by-thanos issue so far he does look messy but he might just have the flu and didn't want to back out #a lot of people are depending on him to jumpstart a movie superhero franchise he can't just take the day off can he #if loki took care of himself thor would be LITERALLY UNEMPLOYED how could he? how could YOU?#(the 'god of thunder' thing isn't a job he doesn't get paid for it so it's just a hobby)#(he doesn't even monetise that hobby! you think iron man would give you storms for free? EXACTLY. he'd have a patreon AT LEAST)#(“if you enjoyed this torrential rain pls tip me on ko-fi which is not pronounced like you think it is because it's a really BAD pun”)#mcu tag i guess #and whatever the fuck my loki character tag was #like i said i really do need to categorise my lokis more it's been bothering me for a while #reminder: i am here because they cast a woman in a previously-male role and SHE'S NOT EVEN IN THIS FILM. OR ANY OF THEM. D:#don't think the alligator's gonna turn up here either :( :( :(#otherwise it's just kind of fascinating what this film assumes i do and don't know about these characters #nick fury's a goth right?

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moving-to-dreamwinged · 6 months

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my dad came in and saw me on the couch (for the first time all day and i had literally just sat down for less than a minute when he came in) w heating pad and immediately goes "you have two options" (different chores to do) (as if i was like 10 years old and getting punished for something that i didnt even know i did wrong). what about secret third option where you treat me like an adult or i don't come home for winter next year. Lol

#.mei chats #soryr really my family is. great i need to stpo complain #i just wish theyd realize that im not incompetent #i do a really good job taking care of myself for the entire 10 months out of the year that i dont live with them #and im proud of the independence ive developed bc i worked really hard to feel ANY sort of positive feelings about myself #but they just dont recognize it at all when i come back #trying to tell me how to microwave my food and reminding me of paperwork i have to do #Thanks i literally managed the entire program tasks myself for the last 6~months but yeah you better remind me about the medical forms #or else ill totally forget and mess up the whole thing :'333 bc im just so stupid!! thakn you soooo much for taking care of me!!#<- not like ive been hypervigilant and anxious about making sure i do every little thing with it perfect #in fact there was actually an issue w one of my forms bc they made me submit it even though i didn't think it was filled out properly.#they were like “itll be fine youre overthinking” guess who got an email 3 days later saying the form was completely invalid.#god just bottom line why cantthey trust me when i say im on top of it. fucking trust me this program is my entire life right now #i am putting literally eveyr ounce of effort i've got into not ruining it. they just dont see the improvements and growth ive made at all #so frustrating bc ive worked so hard to pinpoint and fix that specifically but what can ya do #god this got long. sawry #.not f/o related

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frecklystars · 1 year

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Holy shit. Thank you guys for all of the asks. I got exactly 50!

I meant to respond to them when I got home from work last night, but I didn’t have enough energy by the time I was done reading these. I’m still incredibly exhausted today, it’s like all of the energy is completely sapped out of me since I was in the emergency room the other day.

The heavy ache in my chest definitely lessened while I was focused on reading what you guys wrote last night. The reminders that my TF F/Os still love me is something I really need to hear, something I probably have to tell myself multiple times... I spent so long being conditioned to believe otherwise.

A few of you also reminded me that Starscream had gone through heavy abuse, and he wouldn’t support someone who treated me the way Megatron treats him. It helped me feel better... I think that’s what got through to me the most. I’ve seen so many commissions/fics my ex-friend showed me where she was being manipulative, and that she would be loved for it. Seeing all of that visual representation of her being so tenderly loved by these characters while she was hurting me at the same time, for so many months, it really did some damage and made me internalize the belief that all transformers characters would want to hurt me the same way and love her for it. Especially when the characters she commissioned and talked about the most often were forming into PTSD triggers. For almost a year now, I have just assumed that all of those characters she wrote and commissioned, including Starscream, would encourage her to hurt me and that they would love to see me getting hurt. I don’t choose to feel this way, it’s just... trauma.

But a few of you wrote about how... canonically, Starscream was so fucking pissed when he was abused, especially in RiD2015!! He was so broken up and angry just like I am!! His entire 3 episodes focused on him repeating how unfairly he was treated, how much he wanted to hurt Megatron for all the times he was put through emotional/physical pain, how years had passed since he escaped being tied to his abuser and yet he was so, so angry and still worried that he wasn’t strong enough bc that is what he was conditioned to believe for millions of years. I want to think that same bot would look at me and see himself in me, and hold my hand through this and tell me it’s gonna be okay and it’s gonna get better and he’d never want to treat me the way my abuser treated me. How could he bear it if his little starflower looked at him the way that he looks at Megatron? I don’t want to think he would support my abuser’s actions, no matter how many fics or commissions she has stating otherwise. When I escaped a toxic situation with someone else 3 years ago, I turned to Starscream for this exact same reason, I looked to him for support. He helped me get through it. Now, I need him again after facing treatment that was absolutely horrific, except I’ve been conditioned to believe he would hurt me too; I just feel so sad when I look at him and I wish I could feel loved by him again. It’s been really, really, really hard. Hearing other people tell me that he loves me and would never want to hurt me really helps, I need to be reminded of that, because I absolutely can’t believe it when I try to tell myself.

I’m sorry I’m not able to respond to your asks at the moment, I’m extremely exhausted from. everything. Today has been difficult as well so I will be offline for the rest of the night. I don’t know if I’ll be online tomorrow.

I’m not 100% sure when the commissions will open up, I was really hoping it would happen this week but I didn’t expect to have that panic attack Tuesday, it really drained me. I am hoping that I’ll have comms open by next week, it all depends on how I’m feeling. I might spend more time offline to limit seeing any potential triggers bc I’ve been very fragile since I went to the emergency room, things that normally wouldn’t make me spiral before are probably things that I will have more trouble handling right now, at least until I can calm down again. Normally it takes me about 3 to 5 days to calm down from a severe panic attack like that. But I gotta spend another $400 on new glasses tomorrow morning so... I really do need to open comms soon :’) They will absolutely be open within the next 2 weeks, I just don’t know exactly when. Anyway, thank you guys again for the nice messages, I really needed them and you helped me feel less alone last night ❤

#woof #and all of the asks were nice!!! thank you!!!#im sorry i gotta turn anon back off :(#i didnt get any bad messages or anything but im just cautious #dw i wont keep anons off forever. some of u were asking me to keep it on #i just dont want to read something negative or see any reminders of my abuser #bc then when im at my concert i will be more prone to having flashbacks instead of enjoying charlie puth bangin out the tunes #but ill turn them back on uhhh when im feeling a little better i guess #i just got some ppl trying to talk to me abt my abuser last week like 'ooh shes posting abt u!'#'shes spreading rumors about u. thought u should know' well i DONT want to know! thank u!#anyone who brings her up telling me what she's 'posting about me' is automatically blocked at this point #if she wants to spread rumors that is her problem. and i dont wanna know about it #bc shes dead to me and im keeping it that way ❤#anyway. to all the ppl who wrote 50 nice messages!!! thank u! i needed them #i will reread them the next couple of days while im feeling rly sad and missing my starlight #god i cant wait to get the hyperfixation back. i cant wait to feel safe w/ them again.#one fucking day

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apple-os · 2 months

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ppl who like making friends solely with one-note cardboard boxes who will hang out with them when it's convenient and never open up about who they are as people and what their lives are like dni

#the salt just caught up with me and now im pissed #hi welcome to what i like to call a friendly reminder that hanging out with someone just because its convenient is kind of shitty #and a less friendly reminder that talking about yourself to connect with people is an autistic trait #and an even less friendly reminder that not telling someone if theyve done you wrong and then proceeding to blow up on them is ALSO SHITTY #ESPECIALLY. WHEN. THEY THINK. YOU'RE ON GOOD TERMS. BECAUSE YOU ACTED LIKE IT AND THEY CAN'T READ YOU.#IM REALLY FUCKING MAD #I THINK I HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO BE.#the people who actually somewhat knew me and hung out with me and were on good terms with me think the same #so like BLEH MYEH :PPPPPPPPP #like okay youre entitled to your opinions but sometimes you need to keep those to yourself #did u see me insulting u to ur face #nope i have not done even once #and thats on getting better communication skills instead of lashing out at someone for trying to fit in with your own vibes #like yeah oversharing is my deal. anybody who sees me here knows that #i bond by being open with people about who i am and what i like in the hopes that theyll do the same #if u think im just around for gaming and making silly jokes u would be wrong.#but of course nobody told me people weren't there to bond like that which in my opinion shouldnt be on me #and once again i am outcasted over something honestly kind of fucking stupid #some of the jokes i made were stupid yes but thats solely because i severely misjudged the vibes #and checks notes oh yeah nobody pulled me up for it even once.#okay so let me get this straight you barely know me and have been making assumptions about me since day one #pretty much let me believe you liked me for two whole weeks instead of asking me about things or cutting me off #and im the one who gets treated like im in the wrong? okay #this miscommunication was not my fault in the slightest and i KNOW that #if you hadve just talked to me things would be fine but theyre NOT.#if you hadve just looked at my gosh darn profile and seen im the queerest fucker around making gay and homophobic type jokes maybe you woul #have had half the mind to ask me if i could stop making those jokes!!!!!!!!!#i am not transphobic!!!!!!! I AM TRANS!! I WAS MAKING A MOCKERY OF SOME TRANSPHOBIC CULTURE I HATE!!!!#i mightve vented on main ONE TIME under the guise of a silly joke but oh my god guess what?? that was an attempt to see if anybody related.#you never liked me in the first place dont lie to yourself

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caffeinatedopossum · 10 months

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I went grocery shopping today and realized just how much stronger I've gotten since pre-recovery and now I suddenly don't wanna relapse

#also just had a rather great day that reminded me i can feel happy still #its hard to remember that when it hardly ever happens #idk if i can give up on losing weight though... and it was just one good day. i still need some way to cope :(#idk what to do. i want to be happy. i want this to be the last time i ever had to get better #but i also cant really do anything. i need something more #i guess ill take it one day at a time... though i will probably relapse if i do that #but fuck it I guess it is what it is #well see what happens #I just dont wanna lose all this progress :( and i dont wanna go through recovery again #last time with my ed was so incredibly traumatic. i thought i was gonna die #there would be days id binge eat (relatively 'normal' amounts of food but a whole days worth at once)#and it was because id think 'today could be my last day- i may as well eat what i want now'#but id be in so much pain and have extreme nausea for hours or days not to mention the mental anguish-#god. it was all just really awful. i want things to be better now

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i-can-even-burn-salad · 9 months

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🐙 share a snippet where the character is being a brat/smartass (I'll give choice of wip here)

👁 share a snippet where the character is very visually engaged/a snippet with description - for thorns 😂

Thank you for the ask! From this ask game.

For the first one, who could be better than Valadan from Heal my Wounds (Masterlist | Ebook):

Back at the camp, everything looked as before, except that the amount of stuff scattered around had decreased, and the amount of stuff piled on the cart had increased. Valadan tried to stay out of sight, picking up bits here and there, pretending to be busy until they’d finally be able to leave this place. “I think that’s most of it,” he heard Josephine’s voice across the clearing. “I think that’s most of it,” Valadan mouthed soundlessly, rolling his eyes. Of course it was, everyone could see that.

Funny one you are! Caldyn is very visually engaged throughout the novel (WIP Intro):

When she was done with the flowers, she described the trees he didn’t know. Their leaves were thin and long, a bit like needles, their color dark, almost blue. She painted an image in his mind of how their branches swayed in the wind and how their bark was dark brown, trimmed with a pale gray. Caldyn learned about the color of the pond—a deep, emerald green—and how clear it was and what she could see at the bottom: polished pebbles and tiny fish and seaweed drifting in an invisible current. Lying back in the moss, Seyonna described the patterns the light painted on the ground where the sun broke through the canopy.

#salad-ask #starlit-hopes-and-dreams #this ask is not oc related #Yeah yeah technically HmW isn't a WIP anymore but whatever #I guess I also could have picked one of the first three chapters of Thorns #tbh a very small and not loud enough part of me is a bit disappointed they exist #but backstory is needed XD #And oh my god I was just reminded just how many notes are in this doc #😶#how are your knee caps?

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faeiapalette · 1 year

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“One’s humanity” is something that can be assessed and confirmed by a single action, huh…

#Re-reading Ruki’s MB rn #Man; i didn’t notice how weird it is; the last scene b4 the endings??#Ruki is still an intriguing character tho. The process is kinda similar to Shu’s HDB in term of climax event distributions. I guess.#One day i’ll be doing an all routes review and it’ll be the end for all of you / jk jk #Funny how the endings in here are… illogical in term of how Ruki is weaker in strength if compare to the S bros #But dude’s able to kill all of them #In their sleep; in no time? Even Subaru who’s highly alert all the time? I mean all of them-#But the vampire ending makes sense. Like how the fuck can they be in love 😭#Thanks for confirming that you haven’t been able to love each other Ruki & Yui. I think the slowburn process happened in the after ending.#The convo about what’s kindness between them. Reminds me of whatever LaiYui had in the first two games; one about love and another bout god #Will be back to add more tags into this post cuz my brain is hyper rn. I need to confirm smth.

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chaotictomtom · 1 year

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hehe hoho feeling absolute rage!!!!!!!!!