#But other than this and not being able to fall asleep until 5am no matter what

[ben-her]

You guys know you’re all my best friends, right?

❤️

#Im in that depression mode where the laaaaaast thing i want to do is put clothes on. #It extra sucks because i do actually want to shower as much as possible but my bathroom sucks rn and also i don’t want to change! lol #I just want a bathtub again #And central heating lol #But idc as much as i care about not changing out of my jammies #i did ok getting mostly clothes that basically are jammies but… i just…. Dont… wannaaaaaaaaaaa….. #But other than this and not being able to fall asleep until 5am no matter what #I haven’t had too many bouts of melancholy #Yay💖

[invisibleanonymousmonsters]

Fight Club

Character: Jason Todd x Fem!Reader

Summary: Everyone will say Jason Todd is protective of the people he loves. But sometimes independence is more important than protecting. 

Word Count: 4,000 [One Shot]

Warnings: harassment, stalking, general daily discomfort that women have to deal with 

Y/N was so fucking tired.

It was a miracle that she hadn’t fallen asleep on the bus home from work.

But anyone with half a brain knew that doing so in Gotham was basically asking to get robbed or worse.

Never fall asleep on public transit. Only buy purses and wallets that zip close. Never leave any personal belongings alone in public. Never use an ATM at night. Only take well-traveled and well-lit routes. Always be aware of your surroundings.

These were the unwritten rules of living in Gotham. It was how you stayed safe, how you stayed alive. But even when one followed them strictly, that didn’t insure that they would always be safe.

Which is why Y/N noticed a middle-aged man staring her down on the bus. He knew what he was doing. He knew that he was making her uncomfortable. He was clearly getting off on it.

Y/N just blasted the music in her headphones and pretended not to notice. But she could feel his leering and it made her stomach twist into knots.

She looked down at her watch: 6PM.

Y/N knew she could call Jason. She knew this.

It would take her all of 30 seconds to explain the situation, Jason would instantly understand and then be waiting at her bus stop for her, ready to escort her home safely and glare at whoever had made her uncomfortable.

But Jason was probably sleeping still. 

Last night, he’d returned from patrol needing stitches and had so many bruises scattered across his face that Y/N kept messing up her counting. She was also suspicious that his right hand was broken, but Jason brushed if off so smoothly that she let it slide.

The point was that Y/N had managed to force pain meds on her boyfriend. Jason always slept until late afternoon after patrols anyways, basically becoming nocturnal since he often wouldn’t get back until 5AM.

The meds were meant to make him sleep all day and force him to recover.

The stubborn part of Y/N didn’t want to prevent Jason from getting his much needed recovery and rest.

Except this guy didn’t plan on just staring at her.

When he saw that she was getting off at the stop that was just announced, he too stood up from his seat and moved to the other exit that she wasn’t using.

Y/N was aware of all of this, making sure to track him subtly through the corner of her gaze. It was from the conditioning that all women unfortunately had to go through, whether they realized or not.

Without turning around, she caught his reflection in the window of a building she walked past. He kept a distance to remain unsuspicious, but it was obvious that he was following her.

Y/N tried to subtly walk faster. But she also realized she couldn’t go straight home now. Even with Red Hood being her live-in boyfriend, there was no way she was letting this creep know where she lived.

She started taking a strange route, making weird turns. But it was hard not to lose him without fully running, which she didn’t want to do until it felt absolutely necessary.

But then she came upon a coffeeshop that she knew had a front and back entrance.

She quickly went inside and pretended to get in line for coffee. But when she looked for the man in the corner of her eye, he wasn’t going to come in. Instead, he decided to linger outside and wait for her to come out.

Y/N subtly left the line and made for the back exit.

‘Now it’s time to run,’ she thought to herself.

Y/N was grateful that she had decided to wear stylish sneakers today instead of heels.

By the time she reached the steps of her apartment building, she was breathing heavily. She had been looking over her shoulder every few feet to make sure the creep didn’t get smart.

When she reached her door, she made sure to be quiet in case Jason was still sleeping. Then when she reached the bedroom and quietly opened the door, her mountain of a boyfriend was still passed out in bed with his face pressed into her pillow.

Y/N decided to get started on dinner and quietly moved about the kitchen.

But no matter how much she tried to concentrate on her cooking, her mind kept returning to the man who had tried to follow her home.

What would he have done if he found out where she lived?

Did he plan on grabbing her before she got there?

Did he just get off on making women scared?

Was he planning on raping her? Abducting her? Killing her?

The more Y/N thought about it, the more her fear shifted into rage. Why was it so much more unsafe for women to just merely exist in the world?

But she had no intention of telling Jason.

He would be furious. Not at her, at a man who thought it was OK to even make his girlfriend feel uncomfortable and unsafe – let alone any woman. He would go on a hunt for him and teach him a lesson.

Jason Todd was protective of the people he loved and the innocent – of which Y/N was both. But he also had a bad temper. And whoever was the reason for it starting up better run for their life because Red Hood was not a merciful man and his morals were unpredictable.

So, no. Y/N was not planning on telling her boyfriend, who was also secretly a vigilante with rage issues, about the man who ogled her on public transit and tried to follow her home.

But Y/N was so lost in her thoughts that she didn’t hear said boyfriend finally wake up.

Next thing she knew, someone was slowly wrapping their arms around her waist.

Y/N jumped.

Obviously it was Jason. She knew that. This was not uncommon behavior for him.

But after the day she had and being lost in her thoughts, the feeling of someone’s touch scared the life out of her.

“Hey, hey, hey,” Jason immediately muttered in a whisper at her reaction. “It’s just me.”

Y/N turned around in hopes of easing any worry before he asked any questions.

“Sorry,” she gasped. “I didn’t hear you wake up.”

But Jason narrowed his gaze at the crazed look in her eyes. He could somehow feel her heart racing as he gripped her torso, and traced lines up and down her rib cage with his thumbs in an attempt to soothe her.

“What happened?” He asked as he brushed some hair out of her face.

“Nothing. I’m fine. I was just in my head and zoning out, so you scared me.”

Jason was basically a human lie detector. So he raised an eyebrow at her attempt.

“Y/N,” he warned.

She sighed and shook her head. “Promise you’ll just listen? That you won’t freak out?”

Now Jason was even more worried. “Y/N, what happened?”

She sighed again, knowing it was pointless to ask him not to freak out when it came to her. Now all she could hope for is that she’d be able to calm him down.

Y/N explained what happened to Jason: the bus, the following, the running to make sure a threatening stranger didn’t follow her home.

She could see Jason’s body getting more and more tense, and his expression angrier and angrier. His hands clenched into fits. His posture straightened with purpose.

“Did he grab you? Did he touch you?” Jason asked as soon as he was sure she was done with her whole story.

“No, but…” her words died out.

“He didn’t have to for you to feel violate,” Jason offered her.

Y/N nodded and hung her head.

“Why didn’t you call me?” Jason asked softly.

“I…I don’t know. I wanted to you to rest.” Then Y/N really thought about it. “And despite his intentions being very clear…there was still a voice in my head telling me not to overreact, that there was a small chance I was being paranoid.”

“Y/N, even if you had been wrong, I would’ve rather you felt safe than worry about being wrong. I wouldn’t have been mad at you, or even annoyed.”

“I know. I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to apologize, Y/N.” Jason sighed and pulled her into his arms. “You didn’t do anything wrong. I just love you and want you to be safe.”

She nodded into his shoulder.

———

For the next week, Jason was waiting for Y/N every day after work at her bus stop to walk her home. She didn’t ask him to or even suggest it. But Jason knew she was still shaken after the incident. And the last thing he wanted was his girlfriend living in fear.

On the eighth day of him doing this, Y/N finally spoke up.

“Jason, ya know, you can’t do this forever…”

“I know,” he smirked.

“Why are you smiling?”

“How would you feel about me teaching you some self defense?”

Y/N stopped walking and turned to face him. “Are you messing with me?”

“Nope.”

———

The next weekend, Y/N found herself in the bat cave with her boyfriend, both of them in workout clothes.

“First things first, you have to gain your strength. I can teach you all the moves I want, but you have to make sure your body is in the right condition to defend yourself. And I don’t mean just physically. Confidence is key, beautiful.”

Y/N rolled her eyes at the last part, but still smiled.

“Did we have to have an audience?” She asked as she looked over to see that Tim was on the computer, and Dick and Barbara were working out together.

“Ignore them.”

The next couple of hours, Jason taught Y/N all of the basics of self defense. Especially the tips that benefitted women.

Eye strike. Knee to the groin. Heel-palm attack. Elbow hit. How to escape from a bear-hug attack. How to free herself from a choke hold. How to get out of a headlock.

Y/N was covered with sweat. Meanwhile, Jason looked as put together as he had when they started.

“OK,” she finally said with hands on her hips as she tried to catch her breath. “But if someone that’s the same size as me tried to attack me, I don’t have a chance.”

Jason tilted his head to the side. “And who said that?”

Y/N rolled her eyes. “J, come on. Look at you! Do you really think I would be able to get away – no matter how hard I tried?”

She looked her boyfriend up and down. He was built like a tank, standing at 6’3 and with an almost inhuman width. Just his thighs seemed bigger than her torso.

While Y/N loved cuddly with her giant teddy bear of a boyfriend, she had mercy for anyone that decided to pick a fight with Jason Todd or Red Hood. They didn’t stand a chance.

“Size isn’t everything,” Jason told her with a wink.

She rolled her eyes again.

“Dick! Barbara! Can you come here for a sec?”

“What’s up?” Dick asked with Barbara by his side.

“Y/N thinks that she’d never be able to take on someone bigger than her,” Jason shared with them.

Barbara didn’t even bother trying to hide her laughter.

Dick smirked. “It’ll take a lot of training, Y/N. But don’t worry, I’ll teach you how to kick Jason’s ass. Until then, let us know if he’s giving you any trouble and we’ll handle him for you.”

Jason glared at his older brother, but chose not to give his usual sarcastic retorts. He turned his attention back to Y/N instead. “Dicky here is 5’10 and about 175. Meanwhile, Babs is 5’6 and can’t weigh more than 120.”

Barbara crossed her arms. “Didn’t you ever learn that it’s not polite to comment on a woman’s weight?”

Jason gave her an apologetic look but he knew she wasn’t actually offended. “The point is that I’ve seen Barbara hand Dick his ass more times than I can count. Not to mention guys twice her size.”

Then he looked at the couple and gestured to the sparring mat. “Would you be so kind?”

Dick didn’t seem to have any issue with facing off with his girlfriend.

Meanwhile, Barbara looked excited.

As the two of them began sparring, Jason lowered his voice down to Y/N and pointed out Barbara’s strategies and moves. Then he would explain how she was manipulating her smaller frame and turning it into an advantage.

Next thing Y/N knew, Barbara had Dick on the floor.

Dick was beaming up at his girlfriend with nothing but pride and awe.

“See?” Jason muttered quietly in Y/N’s ear.

Barbara laughed and held a hand to help Dick up. He jumped back onto his feet and gave his girlfriend a kiss. 

“What’s going on?” A voice said at the bottom of the stairs.

They all turned to see Damian had entered the Bat Cave.

“Teaching Y/N some self defense,” Jason shrugged.

Damian sighed. “I do not understand why society does not train women to defend themselves – especially when they are not protected from evil men.”

Y/N laughed. “Not everyone was raised by a league of assassins, Damian.”

But then Damian’s words hit her again in a different way. She spaced out for a moment.

Jason looked at her with concern. “You OK?”

She just nodded.

He wasn’t convinced, but let her be. “I think that’s enough training for today.”

Jason’s brothers convinced him and Y/N to stay for a family movie night. 

They used Jason’s old room to shower, since Y/N was covered in sweat by the end of her self defense lesson. Jason gave her some of his old clothes for her to wear that he’d left behind.

When they got to the theatre room, Jason could tell how exhausted Y/N was. She was going to be sore tomorrow – probably for a few days, actually.

She curled into Jason as they grabbed one of the love seats. In moments like these, Jason was always amused how she seemed more like his pet cat than his girlfriend.

Dick and Barbara cuddled together, as well.

Damian brought a book, pretended to already be bored, and acted like he was forced to join family movie night.

Tim brought in his laptop so he could continue to work.

Alfred brought them snacks every so often.

Even Bruce came in halfway through the movie, making his entrance so subtle that they almost didn’t notice.

But lo and behold, not even 15 minutes into the movie, Y/N had passed out. 

Jason ended up having to carry her to his car after the movie – not that he minded in the slightest – and drive home as smoothly as possible, so he didn’t wake her.

———

A few days later, Y/N found Jason reading while lounging on the couch in the living room of their shared apartment.

She hopped on beside him, laying across his chest and sliding underneath his book.

Jason chuckled at her antics and put his book down, realizing she wanted his full attention and not just to snuggle while he continued to read.

“So, I was thinking…” Y/N began.

“Mhmm,” Jason hummed.

“I’m not the only woman in Gotham who’s been harassed. You of all people know that – probably better than I do.”

Jason’s amusement disappeared as he listened to where she was going.

“Did you know that in most big cities, there are almost always more women than men?”

“I did not.”

Then she sat up straight, but remained close to him. “But Gotham is the only major American city where there are 20% more men than women.” She waited for him to interrupt, but he just continued to pay close attention. “Researchers believe it’s because of the high crime rate in Gotham, and therefore it’s even more unsafe for women to live here than men.”

“Makes sense,” Jason agreed. “Why are you telling me this?”

“When you started giving me self-defense lessons and then Damian made the comment about no one training women, I kept thinking how other women don’t have a family of vigilantes to keep them safe or teach them how to defend themselves.”

“I’ve seen enough of this city to know that you’re right,” Jason commented darkly.

“Exactly.”

“You still haven’t explained why we’re talking about this…”

“Right,” Y/N smiled embarrassingly. “What if we – I don’t know – started a center for women to learn what you taught me. Completely pro bono. Like a…”

“Fight Club?” Jason offered with a smirk.

“Well, not exactly. But kinda,” Y/N giggled.

Then she frowned as her mind was still working all of it out. “I just don’t know who could teach it. You and your family are already too busy. Teaching women how to defend themselves is a little beneath you…”

“First of all, it’s not beneath us. But you’re right: Dick barely has a second to spend with Babs. Tim is so sleep deprived that he’s just gonna collapse one day. It also wouldn’t be smart for our cover and show that all the Wayne kids can hold themselves in a fight. People might start putting things together...”

“Right,” Y/N agreed and looked further disappointed.

“Hey,” Jason said with an encouraging smile and lifted her chin to look at him. “It’s a good idea. And between my brothers and me, we know plenty of retired heroes that would be more than willing to help out.”

Y/N’s eyes brightened. “Really?”

He nodded. “Dinah, Roy, Wally and Artemis. Hell, I bet if Bruce mentioned it to Diana, she’d smuggle in some Amazons to really show ‘em.”

Y/N smiled at the idea.

“You should tell Bruce,” Jason added.

“Bruce?”

“He has a habit of blindly writing checks for a good cause. I bet he’d just straight up buy you a warehouse to hold classes in.”

She frowned. “I don’t – won’t he feel like I’m taking advantage of him?”

Jason laughed. “I know he’s shit at showing it, but Bruce likes you. And I think he’d be more than happy to help.”

Y/N’s eyes glazed over. “Bruce Wayne likes me?”

He rolled his eyes. “Don’t let it get to your head…”

“So, you think this is a good idea?”

Jason couldn’t help himself when she looked this adorable and excited. He grabbed her torso and flipped them so her back was on the couch and he was now hovering above her.

“I think it’s a great idea,” he told her softly before kissing her.

But before Y/N could push the intimacy any further, Jason pulled away from her lips.

“I have to tell you something,” his voice suddenly went serious.

Y/N’s smile dropped. “What? What is it?”

“I know you didn’t want me to…”

Then she sat up, lightly pushing Jason off of her. “Christ, Jason. What did you do?”

He took in a quick breath. “I found him.”

“Found who?”

“The guy who followed you.”

“Fuck,” Y/N put her hands over her face. “Jason. God. What the fuck.” “I know! I know. I should’ve told you sooner.”

Y/N rubbed her face and looked at him. “Please, please tell you didn’t kill him.”

Jason had the audacity to roll his eyes. “I didn’t kill him, OK? Happy?”

“No, I’m not happy! You went after him when I explicitly asked you not to!”

“Did you forget that the guy you’re dating is also a vigilante? In what world did you expect me to not look him up?” He shook his head in wonder. “I mean, the idiot’s face was all over the public transit database I hacked when I looked up the footage from the cameras on your bus – not to mention the footage from half the storefronts you walked by.”

Y/N only glared at him.

“Don’t be mad,” he requested.

“Well, I am.”

Jason sighed. Then he scooted closer, hoping she’d allow it. “Look, I get what’s going on. And I get why you want to help all these women.”

She eyed him, but let him continue.

“I’m sure it’s hard to believe, but I know what it’s like to feel like you can’t protect yourself.” He cleared his throat, catching himself. “I know it’s not the same as what women have to deal with on a daily basis. I’ll never really know what that’s like.”

Jason kept all the terrible things he’d seen on patrol to himself. But there were things he knew would terrify and traumatize her. Because of this, Jason wasn’t as oblivious to the suffering of women as the majority of men were. Or maybe he just chose to actually acknowledge it and care.

He took in a deep breath. “But I just hated the idea of someone doing that to you. And I know there’s probably a million times its happened and you haven’t told me, or you didn’t even notice because you’ve gotten so used to it. I just…I couldn’t let him get away with it.”

Jason paused to let her process his excuse. He’d be the first to admit it wasn’t a good one.

But Jason Todd was fiercely protective of the people he loved. And Red Hood’s sole purpose was to protect the those who couldn’t protect themselves – no matter the cost.

So when his girlfriend was troubled enough to lose sleep or zoned out constantly to rehash what happened, he was going to do something about it.

Jason was fully aware of his anger issues. But he also learned how to redirect them to be something a bit more productive.

“So…what did you do to him?” Y/N asked nervously.

He gave her a look, silently asking her if she really wanted to know.

“Jason…” she warned him.

“He had a record, OK? Let’s just say you weren’t the first woman he’s done that to. And a lot of them weren’t as lucky as you. So he got what he fucking deserved.”

“And what is that?” She pushed, refusing to let him gloss over it so easily.

Jason rolled his eyes. “I roughed him up a bit, alright? Told him I’d be watching. Scared the shit out of him enough that, hopefully, he won’t ever pull that shit again.”

Y/N let out a laugh and shook her head at him.

Jason would take her amusement over her anger any day, even if she was teasing him.

“What?” He asked through a grin.

She bopped his nose. “So protective over me.”

Jason had enough of the distance between them.

He moved her body so she had no choice but to sit on his lap. “‘Course I am.”

Then he kissed her. But when he pulled away, his face was rather thoughtful.

“You’re not going to feel helpless forever, ya know.”

They were words to comfort her. Because deep down Jason knew that promising to always be there for her wasn’t going to make her feel better. She wanted him as her boyfriend, not her bodyguard – despite Jason being more than happy to be both for her.

“I know,” Y/N confirmed with a shy smile.

-------------------------------------

Whatcha think?

#jason todd x reader #jason todd reader insert #batfam #batboys #batman family #dick grayson #barbara gordon #damian wayne #red hood #red hood x reader #red hood reader insert #jason todd fic #dc #tim drake #red hood fic

[writingsbychlo]

smoke and fire (03)

word count; 10,638

summary; you and thomas almost find some common ground, but clinging to petty hatred might ruin it all.

notes; making some progress, and I know y’all are going to love the tension building.

warnings; burnings buildings, minor burns, reference to injury, reference to explosions.

Humming along to the tune playing from your phone, it was plugged into the speaker atop the counter, the lowest volume you could get it as you tried to keep the volume down. You never had been one to sleep while at the Firehouse, no matter how late at night your shifts were, and while this was your team’s two weeks of night shift rotations, you’d adapted to it easily.

Maybe you’d been forced to. Maybe you’d force yourself to. You weren’t exactly comfortable with the team yet, and something about going to sleep surrounded by people you didn’t know felt uncomfortable to you. You trusted them with your life, your job required that you did, but you would only get restless sleep anyway.

Cooking, however, was something you were comfortable with. Cooking at night while the rest were asleep, the clock barely tickling past 5AM as they all slept until called to duty gave you free time to be with your own thoughts.

The smell of frying bacon was filling the room, lyrics falling quietly from your lips as your hips swung, and you heard the first of your colleagues begin to shuffle into the room. You turned to look over your shoulder, Minho being the first to wake, and you’d learned recently that he was always the first to wake. He was an early bird, someone who normally went for a jog before coming on his shifts, and he groaned, scratching at his stomach while the other arm stretched over his head, trying to wake himself up a little more.

“Smells like bacon. Did you make enough for two?”

“I made enough for about twenty.” You teased, hearing his sleepy laugh, and he came to hop up onto the island counter behind you, bypassing the chairs as he took a seat on the higher surface instead, and he rubbed at his eyes.

“You cooked for us?”

“I cooked for me, and figured I might as well make sure you all get a healthy breakfast in, too. Can’t have you slacking on the job because all you ate for breakfast was three candy bars and a skittle, can I?” You grabbed for a plate, a stack that you’d placed beside yourself, the first one being dished up to your friend. A couple of pancakes from the hot plates, sausages, bacon, eggs, and a pot of coffee, and you dished it up, sliding it towards a seat as he fetched a set of knives and forks for you both, groaning loudly at the sight of food.

“This looks amazing.”

He took a seat on the stool this time, poking at it all in the lower light as he chopped up his food, folding a piece of bacon inside a pancake, and lifting the bundle to his mouth. Serving yourself up and covering the rest, you leaned against the counter in front of him, beginning to chop at your food. As he chewed the mouthful longer, he tipped his head back, a louder and longer groan falling from his lips as he showed his appreciation for the meal, and you covered your snicker with your food, chewing a mouthful and shaking your head fondly.

“Who’s folding porn in here? It better not be Minho, again.”

“Again?” You almost choked on your food as Winston came wandering in, your brow raising as you turned to your colleague, and he sighed dramatically.

“They were filming a tour video for the Firehouse for a thing online, I don’t know.” He waved his hand, shoving another forkful into his mouth, and you realised the men here had never been raised to chew with their mouths closed, as though they were raised wild as teens. “Anyway, I was seeing this chick at the time, and y’know, she was hot. A bit too feisty even for me.”

“I somehow find that hard to believe.”

“Hey, there are things even I wouldn't do!” He objected, and behind you, as he helped himself to food, Winston snorted. “Yeah, not much, though.”

“Anyway, as I was saying, she comes to visit me at work. She’s got her hands all over, she was just dating me because I was a fireman. She drags me behind a truck and we were, well, making out pretty heavily. Like teenagers behind the science block. They caught it on the camera while touring, and had to cut it all out and refilm that section.” He shrugged, like it was no big deal, and Winston took a seat beside him, your eyes fixed on your coworkers, brows raising.

“It was more than just making out. She had her legs around your waist.”

“She did not!” Minho scoffed, crumbs of the food flying everywhere, and you couldn’t contain the laugh as he turned to punch his friend in the arm, the two setting off in a weak match of slaps and punches as they tried to keep eating.

Brenda was next through the door, already seeming to look composed and poised like she’d had hours to get ready, all but gliding through the room, and she flickered her eyes over the two tussling boys. “What’s going on in here?”

“Winston was just telling me about the time Minho got caught on camera kissing a chick behind the trucks.”

“Oh, you mean the girl with her legs around his waist?” Brenda was then immediately drawn into the argument, hissed whisper-shouts as you tried to contain your laughter, and as the hours ticked on from the discussion, your plate slipped into the dishwasher, a fresh pot of coffee being started, more and more of the team began to join the room. The next was Gally. His nose turned up at the offer of coffee, Brenda mocking him for his selective taste in teas, trying to copy his accent too, but he did help himself to a plate of food. Clint and Jeff were next, the two practically attached at the hip, moving as a unit, always one with the other. They were talking among themselves as they got their breakfasts, but took enough time free to offer their greetings to everyone, mumbling a vague ‘thank you’ to ‘whoever had cooked’, before they were sitting at the table and becoming invested in their conversation once again.

Newt came in next, bright and cheery and full of energy, as he had been for the last three days since getting the boot taken off his foot and being able to rotate his ankle and walk normally again, limp barely present now he was like a bright ray of sunshine, rising with the actual sunrise. Fry and Zart followed, passing through as the sun in the room rose, the music being drowned out by the loud chatter in the room, the clattering of cutlery and utensils, with the vague noise of the morning news being turned on for a weather update.

Taking your phone back from where it was placed on the stand, you lifted it up, barely any of the food you’d made remaining, and you felt an overwhelming sense of accomplishment at providing for your team, and never having a single complaint. It wasn’t often that you made this kind of gestures, it wasn’t often worth it, not when you were so used to take your meals and finding a quiet spot to eat alone, but more and more, you’d been finding yourself enjoying the company of the people around you, progressively feeling more included in the conversations and activities as the ripples across the water caused by your arrival began to settle.

Chuck was a late riser, still looking completely dazed as he stepped into the room, a little wobble in his step, and you took the liberty of creating a plate for him, and a large mug of coffee, taking it over to where he had slumped down at the dining table with his head rested on his hands, eyes already closing. Creeping up behind your friend, you leaned down, light snores leaving him as he began to doze off again, despite being surrounded by stimulation, noise and light.

“Boo!”

He jerked violently, almost knocking the food and mug out of your hand as he sat up, looking shocked for just a moment, before red-twinged cheeks were facing your directions, narrowed eyes in a glare, and a scowl on his face. “You suck.”

“I brought you food and coffee.”

He considered it for a moment, eyes sweeping over the plate, before sitting up a little straighter. “Okay, you suck slightly less now.”

He accepted the offerings, digging in almost instantaneously, and you took a seat beside him, sipping the hot drink in your own hands as you absorbed the environment. Making friends was hard when you skipped about so much, even making friends outside of work, as you moved from one side of the city of the other to new houses, never bothering to decorate or properly unpack because you weren’t sure how long you’d ever be in one location.

It was undeniably nice to be surrounded for once, and not be immediately looking for the next exit.

Chuck was happy to just talk, filling the space between you both as he spoke about everything he could think of. He told you about his mother, and his four older sisters, the second of whom was getting married, and the first of whom was halfway through her pregnancy, and how excited he was to become an uncle. He asked you about your bruises, and how the swelling was doing, making you demonstrate the rotations of your arm for him as the muscles no longer ached as you could lift them over your head, some discoloured splotching where the bruises were almost healed was all that was left.

As the clock ticked over, just past 8AM, the room was full. Even Vince having passed through and joined you all for a cup of coffee and a reasonably quick chat, giving into the teasing he was getting from Newt and Brenda about an update on the doctor he’d been seeing, her name revealed as Mary now things were getting serious, and you hoped to meet her one day at the hospital.

It was clear to you that the people here were a family, and despite the friction between you and some of the members, certain ones sticking strong with their guards up against you as they followed in their Lieutenant’s footsteps, you were winning some of them over. Newt had yet to bring it back up, the challenge that he’d issued you of giving it a year, and promising that this house would be different, but you knew he hadn't forgotten the conversations, because every so often, you’d catch his gaze lingering on you when you were chatting to another colleague, and reaching out a little more.

Chiming about your head signalled a call coming in, the room falling from commotion and filled with activity to dead and silent as everyone listened, and the second it was over, all of the chairs were scraping, pots and cutlery clammering as plates were stacked up haphazardly, and the room was cleared in seconds. Only you and Newt remained, being given a free minute, maybe two at the maximum, as you waited for the foremen to grab their equipment and swap out shoes for protective boots, gear in hand as they loaded the trucks.

“I’m going to go and check on Tommy, make sure he’s up.”

You nodded, realising now why the atmosphere around you was so peaceful. There was no walking on eggshells or lingering glares, nothing that might put you off about saying the wrong thing in fear of getting yelled out, or burning gals into the back of your skull, but simply the calm and quiet of being surrounded by people who were at least civil with you, instead of hating your guts.

Grabbing the trays that were barely even warm now, the food having cooled a while ago, you stacked up what was on a single plate, covering it with a quick wrap of foil, and watching as Thomas stumbled on past in a flurry of movement that made you think he might trip, grabbing his boots from the floor and his coat and helmet form the rack, not even bothering to change them before getting onto the squad truck waiting, and watching as it disappeared.

Tucking the reserved plate into the fridge, everything else was left out to be sorted later, and you grabbed the keys from the rack, meeting Newt in the doorway, the two of you jogging side by side to the vehicle. Since the period of time when you’d been driving instead of him while his boot was on, he seemed to have gained a little more trust in you, allowing you to drive the vehicle instead, every so often, despite how precious the rig maybe to him.

Doors slamming shut on either side, and as soon as the engine was on, Newt flipped on the emergency sirens, letting you strap yourself in beside him as you began to pull out of the courtyard, chasing after the red trucks ahead of you both in a rapid pursuit to your destination.

Early morning traffic cleared, the palm of your hand continually pressing down on the horn as people tried to pull back across lanes in the road as soon as the firetrucks had cleared, never having the patience to wait for the ambulances to go through to, but you battled to keep up with them, the smaller vehicle making it easier to navigate and weave through the other cars.

Smoke was already curling up into the air as you arrived, thick and dark, worrying bursts of it, and the stench of gas was filling the car as soon as you arrived on the street, pulling up to the sidewalk and throwing the van into park.

Hopping out of the vehicle, you let out a long breath, trying not to cringe at the smell on the air or the taste it was leaving in your mouth, your stomach twisting a little. You shared a look with Newt, looking around at the situation as you tried to assess it all, feet carrying you closer to the group of firefighters who were coming up with a game plan for the situation at hand. Thomas was already barking orders, hair messy from scratching at it and running his hands through with stress, a look you’d seen several of the men get when things shit the fire, pun intended, and you came to a halt.

Crossing your arms over your chest, Thomas’ eyes flicked to you and Thomas, words pausing in his mouth, snapping shut as he tried to reevaluate the plan. sniffling at the air, he groaned a little, skating his head.

“Alright, Minho’s on shutting these gas lines. Go and find an override until we can get this fixed. Take Chuck with you.” The official firefighter nodded, the unofficial firefighter perking up a little at the task, and pulling on their masks, the two of them set off. “Can I get paramedics setting up a stretcher straight away, we got reports that there’s a family inside, the house that started the fire. Mother was cooking when the main exploded, and it shot right through to her stove.”

You had your instructions, the two of you heading in a quick jog back to the van, because no matter what everyone else did, you had your instructions. The back of the van was opened, and you worked on unfastening the stretcher wheels as Newt prepped the van, a medkit laid out on the shelves and the ramp down. There were already people beginning to inch their way, undoubtedly complaining of headaches and nausea due to the exposure.

There was a breeze along the road, warm and reasonably calm, nothing intense enough to whip up smoke and dust into your eyes, and it was good at clearing away the lingering cloud of gas on the street, but it wasn’t so good for the firefighters. You couldn't help the way that your eye swerve flickering over to the house every so often, bright and roaring as you felt the heat all the way from here, warm cheeks under the burning glare, and you worried the flames would spread.

They were only raising higher, the entire downstairs of the house had taken alight, and Thomas and his team were still trying to work out how to get inside of the house without endangering themselves, and how to get the family out. Brenda was on hoses, dragging the reel down the street to the closest fire hydrant as fast as she possibly could, trying to screen the nozzle into place.

It was easy enough to access people, giving them each a small mask and an oxygen tank, sitting them down on the opposite curb of the sidewalk, and making sure to run along and check on their symptoms again every five minutes. The roads had been closed off on either side, barricaded by police cars and trucks, and Minho and Chuck were returning, helping Brenda with the hose as they went. The first member of the family was being brought out, a young girl being carried by who you assumed to be Gally, purely based on the height of hi as he came running over, the little girl in his arms out cold as she hung limply in his grip, and he rushed to lay her down against the bed.

“Newt, can I get a monitor?”

He yelled his reply, words not making much sense as he fumbled in the back of the van, grabbing at the monitor as best he could, and you began your initial assessment of her. Your suspicions were confirmed as the helmet and mask form the firefighter before you were removed, Gally staring down at you, wide eyes as your hands scanned along her. Tipping her head back, you opened her mouth, checking her throat hadn't become blocked, before using the small flashlight on your keychain to check the reaction in her pupils.

“She’s got some rapid ration to light in her pupils, no brain damage, smoke and gas inhalation isn’t too bad.” He let out a sigh of relief, lips flicking up at the sides as you confirmed her safety to him. Pressing gently along her lungs, you found no broken bones or ribs, making sure to keep her head a little tipped back so her airways were open as best they could be, and Newt rounded the table to the other side Bumping Gally out of the way slightly, the taller boy stepped back, waiting anxiously for more confirmation. It was sweet, his concern for the younger ones, and you’d noticed it over the last month and a half, watching him interact with children was always special. “You got a sister, Gally?”

“How’d you know?”

“Call it a lucky guess.” You teased, watching Newt beginning to cut away the sleeve of her shirt to hook up a child-sized heart monitor band onto her arm. Gally seemed just as panicked, and you’d be willing to bet money on his little sister being young, probably around this girl’s age, and seeing his own family in the victims. “Tell me about her? I bet she’s really cute.”

“She is, actually. She’s going through a unicorn phase, has been ever since turning seven.”

Bingo.

“She likes glitter too, and if you ask her what her favourite colour is, she’ll probably say rainbow. My parents have this neighbour, who is a couple years older than her, but they still hang out. The neighbour just got her first eyeshadow kit, you know, those ones they give away as free gifts with kids magazines and stuff? All the latest gossip on Selena Gomez or High School Musical, or whatever?”

You laughed a little bit, stepping away into the truck long enough to find another of the pre-prepared rows of oxygen tanks made up, and bringing it back with a small mask. Putting the band over her head, a soft beeping took up around you both as Newt confirmed that he couldn't find any further injuries on the girl, her stomach feeling soft and so there wasn’t much likelihood of any internal injuries, she was just unconscious. “Hey, don’t knock those magazines! That’s where I got my first lip gloss from!”

“She’s too young for makeup!” He huffed, the overprotective brother in him shining through to the foreground as he spoke. “So, uh, this little one. She’s going to be okay?”

“Of course, she is. Newt and I are a great team!” You beamed, Newt cheering from a few metres away where he’d wandered off to go and check on the other patients, check they were all still doing okay, no further symptoms arising. Turning the box with the heartbeat to him, his eyes closed in on it, looking as confused as ever. “There’s a lot of symbols and crap that looks confusing, I know, but just listen. Steady heartbeat, nice and strong.”

“That’s good.”

“Yeah, it is.” Pointing to a collection of numbers, the meaning of which was like reciting the alphabet to you but you didn’t have time to explain it to Gally right now. “See these numbers, that means her heart is staying at that strength too, she’s not fluctuating or dipping, she’s doing just fine. She’s got a mask on, and other than a killer headache when she wakes up, she’s going to be just peachy.”

“Thank you.” He finally let his shoulder’s slump, looking back towards the house, and pulling his mask back on, a nod shared between you both as his helmet followed, and with that brief break to check on the young girl he’d saved, he was returning to guide his team.

The flames in the wind were getting awfully close to the other house, despite the teams trying to put out the flames, but there were only two hoses, and they had to focus on getting the downstairs of the current house controlled first. Now that the gas was out, the flames were beginning to be tamed, no longer having an accelerant to burn on, only the fuel of the house, but it didn’t make the charred black marks along the outside of the house any less concerning.

The second patient you were receiving was the father, coughing and spluttering, conscious but in a worse state than his daughter, though he looked like he didn’t care about any of it as his eyes locked onto the little girl, and he tried to put more weight on his own two feet and less on the member of your team who was holding him up.

You didn't get to see who this was, because he was dashing away from the second that the man was showing signs of being able to support his own body, right back into the flames to become a hero once again. You rushed forward as he stumbled, hands grabbing onto him to try and keep him held up, and you walked him backwards slowly as he wheezed, sitting him down on the edge of the truck, his eye moving over to his little girl.

“My girl-”

“-is going to be just fine, sir, don’t you worry. I’ve already checked her out, and she’s doing great. She’s strong, a little fighter!” You offered him a smile, one that he weakly returned, his shoulder’s slumping as he coughed violently. “Can you tell me your name?”

“John.” He wheezed, and you nodded, grabbing a fresh set of forms from the truck and placing them down beside him. Checking his airways and his vision, you deemed him okay, asking him about his pain levels, while preparing a new mask for him, and hooking it all up, twisting the oxygen on and hearing the canister let out a little hiss as it was activated.

“Can you tell me your last name?”

“Davidson.” He muttered, accepting the mask happily from you as you held it out to him, lifting it over his head, and he was covered in soot, ash still lingering in the hair around his head, a light burn on the patches of clear skin on the top, his head ducking as you began to check them over.

“Well, Mr Davidson, I’d say you’re looking rare, maybe medium-rare, but you’ll be just fine.” His eyes creased a little at the sides, a muffled laugh from behind the mask as he tried to take deep and steadying breaths, nodding his head. “You think you can start filling out those forms for me? Get one filled out for every member of your family, and it’ll save you so much time at the hospital, and it’d really do me a solid.”

He held slightly shaking hands out to you, a collection of them all pinned on the board, beginning to write his name slowly, both of your attentions looking up at the sound of snapping wood. The porch had collapsed, the smoke in the doorway clearing a little, but just because the lower flames were beginning to give way, the upper was still burning bright, only catching more heat, and you nibbled on your lower lip.

“Everyone is alright, neighbours are doing a headcount among themselves, but there’s an elderly chap, mid-seventies, name of ‘Mr O’Hare’ seeming to be missing.”

The sound of a pain clattering onto the metal of the ambulance floor before rolling away and hitting the concrete made you jump, both of you turning with raised brows to look at the man behind you, Crouching down to get the pen again, you handed it back to him, and he raised a weak hand to pull at his mask, concern and imminent fear on his face again. “That’s our neighbour.”

“I’m sorry?”

“Mr O’Hare, that’s our neighbour. He hasn’t been doing so well, lately, my wife brings him groceries every week, his family comes to visit. He sleeps a lot, he gave us a key to get in to put the groceries away.” A wash of panic set over both you and Newt, your eyes flicking back up to the house you’d been concerned about, the black marks of charring on the walls beginning to grow as the flames curled over, and as you squinted a little, you found the edges of the rood were already beginning to powder to ash, sizzling orange as the risked igniting.

You grabbed ahold of Newt’s arm, encouraging the man in your care to go back to the sheets he should be focusing on, trying to keep him calm. “Nobody has been in that house yet, Newt. That house is full of gas, the doors and windows are closed. It’s a time bomb waiting to go off.”

“You’d better go and find a fireman, because here comes the wife, and I’m going to need to go to the hospital as soon as she’s checked out.” You only nodded your head, grabbing for your medkit, swinging the bags up onto your shoulders and setting off. The first you came across was Chuck, standing outside of the building at the back of the house, making sure no wires were becoming trapped, and just as you were about to try and get his attention, a blur of movement in your peripherals brought you to a stop.

A concerned neighbour, no idea what was about to happen but you felt like you were watching it in slow-motion as the young man made his way up toward the door, kicking at it roughly as he did, the lock popping as he tried to venture inside for his neighbour. A split second, he’d barely gotten through the doorway, before the loud explosion of a houseful of gas igniting in an instant made your eyes ring, as though your eardrums had shattered. The blast sent you down to the floor, smoke, splintered wood, shards of glass, all flying around you at the sudden implications.

You could hear muffled screaming around you, your fingers digging into the dirt beneath you as you scraped your hands back to your body, and pushed yourself up. Cuts along your skin, nothing you couldn't take care of, simply the light pieces of glass that had flown past, leaving a message in their wake, a warning not to play with anything sharp. Large hands locked onto your body, pulling you to your feet, and you blinked away the stunned feeling you had, watching as the mask was lifted.

Shaking your head little, it all suddenly came back into focus, piercing sounds, the yelling of worried neighbours, and the closer yelling of the man in front of you. Gally. “(Y/L/N), are you okay?”

“Y-Yeah. I’m good, I’m fine. A few bumps and scratches, nothing serious.” He nodded his head, eyes sweeping over you regardless, and you pushed messy hair back out of your face. “There’s someone in that building, though. I was going to suggest going through the door after leaking the gas out slowly, but it’s a bit late for that now.”

You looked around, a cord forming around the man who’d been blasted back, and it wasn’t looking good.

“We’re going to need another ambulance. Call med, get one here.”

He nodded, his head, stepping away from you for a second to bring his radio to his mouth, and your hand snagged onto Chuck’s arm, shaking him a little as he stared in abject horror at the scene before him, his age really showing on his face now. Orange flickered over his features, the presence of freckles on your friend’s face distracted by hair that almost looked red in front of flames, and you shouted his name to catch his attention, wide eyes snapping to you.

“Where’s your team?” He raised a hand, pointing to the smoke of the building, and you nodded your head. He was rattled, and you shook him a little, hands on the lapels of his fireproof jacket for leverage. “Hey, Chuck, listen up. This is no time to freeze, alright? You’re a firefighter, now get someone who can spare a hand on the radio, because there’s someone else who needs saving.”

He swallowed thickly, nodding his head, and bringing the device up, button on the side pressed to talk into, and it crackled for a minute as he put the message out there, waiting for someone to reply. Grabbing his arm, you dragged him along behind you, letting him stand behind you as you shouldered through to find the groaning man on the floor, skin raw and burned, grit stuck to him from where he’d rolled along the floor in the blow back, and you hissed a little, kneeling down.

Dropping your bag and snapping on a fresh pair of gloves, Chuck sent out another call for help, and you rolled the man onto his back carefully. There wasn’t much you could do for him here, except get him on a mask and disinfect his wounds, but it wasn't going to be a pleasant process. A canister of disinfectant was your best bet for covering raw areas this large, and you pulled it out, shaking it aw you went.

“Chuck, what’s wrong?”

You bit your tongue from groaning at who replied, glancing over your shoulder for a second, the nervous boy’s eyes meeting yours, and you gave him a nod, staying focused on your task at hand and waiting for Chuck to speak instead. “We’ve got a situation, Lieutenant. That building that just went up, (Y/N) says there’s someone trapped inside, upstairs, I think.”

“Fuck. Not exactly getting in through the bottom floor, are we?” There was a series of rattles, scuffling as you assumed them to be checking over the rooms, and you swallowed thickly, hearing the wailing sirens of another ambulance beginning to get close enough to you. The conversation around you fell away, letting Chuck and Thomas hash out a plan, before you were looking back to the man on the floor, his eyes wide and on yours, shaking with pain as he still tried to stay strong.

“Hey, that was real brave of you there. Trying to save your neighbour, huh?”

“I just wanted to help.” He mumbled, words broken and light as he tried not to cry them out, his voice strained, and you nodded your head.

“Yeah, and it was admirable. One of the bravest things I’ve ever seen, and I work with firefighters! I’m going to get you patched up, alright?” He nodded his head, gritting his teeth as you warned him that it was going to hurt, before spraying the cleaner over his skin, and a shrieking scream left his lips. It was blood-curdling, and you’d never get used to the way your stomach clenched or your teeth ground together when you knew you were causing someone that pain, even if you were trying to help. It would cool, a foam setting over his skin as it dissolved softly, and the pain faded away as the paste helped start to remove trapped heat from his skin, soothing burns and making him slump back a little. “You hear those sirens, real close now. They’re for you.”

He only nodded, before a hand was finding your shoulder, and Chuck was pulling you back a little, much to your confusion.

“What is it, Chuck? I need to get him loaded onto an ambo’.”

“No, you need to come with me.” Your brows furrowed, his hands finding your wrist, and as the ambulance pulled up, you caught sight of another paramedic, one you’d seen around the halls at the hospital, flagging them down to where the man was as they grabbed a board and set off toward him. “Lieutenant has a plan, best we got.”

“Alright, what is it?”

He stopped you before the truck, opening up one of the storage doors on the side, eyes scanning over you for a second, before he was beginning to pull out equipment. “We’re going to extend a ladder from one window to the other, crawl across, and get him. Then, come back across the ladder.”

“That’s a twenty-foot drop, you’d break bones if you fall, maybe even your neck, and the older man in that house won’t be able to balance.”

“He’s going to have to.” Chuck placed a helmet onto your head, wrapping a jacket around your arms, and you barely caught the mask he was pressing into your hands. “You’re going to have to as well, because he’s going to need a medical check.”

“A medical check? The man won’t even be conscious with the amount of gas built up in there!”

“Good thing you’re coming then. Do your job well, save his life.” The static-covered voice over the radio called out, and you glared at the device, jaw clenching at the insinuation that you ever did anything less than your best. Gally and Winston were unloading a manual ladder from the truck, setting off into the house with it, and you gulped as you felt your friend's hands move along the front of the jacket to fasten it up. Pants came next, a large pair of baggy and protective pants, stepping into them as he held them out to you, as fear filled your body at the idea of having to crawl from one burning building and into another. “Hurry up and get her kitted, Chuck, we don’t have all day! Floors getting weaker up here by the second.”

He followed with boots, a little too big for your feet but they would do, your sneakers left discarded on the floor beside you as he laced them up, and you forced yourself to be strong, just like everybody else had been today. Leaning down to take the radio and make sure it was on for you to speak into, you found yourself rearing into action. “I’m going to get a neck brace from our ambo’ and a blackboard, our best bet is to just slide him across it while he’s unconscious, like a conveyor belt, fastest way.”

“I’ll get you two men and we’ll call in for a third ambo’ to collect him.” Thomas confirmed, and you tried to get used to walking in the heavy material, feeling like your body was being weighed down by all the gear. Newt was just getting himself ready to leave for the hospital, closing up the back of the ambulance, and his eyes scanned over you before a cheeky grin was taking place.

“Wow, look at you. Hot date?”

“Yeah, real hot.” You muttered, jabbing a finger over your shoulder. “I need the backboard and the neck brace, I’ll meet you back at the station, alright?”

He only nodded his head, hanging both pieces of equipment to you and sealing up the van, but before you’d managed to catch sight of the smile that John had sent you, his wife petting their daughter’s hair as they were confirmed to all be alright.

Chuck checked your mask, turned on your tank, and a rush of pure air filled your lungs as you took a breath, before the helmet was being placed over your head, and you already felt like you were burning up from the inside out. You’d dashed into a burning building before, hopped up on adrenaline and desperation, but this somehow felt different.

Like an out of body experience as you felt the wooden flooring chip under your feet, crunching as it burned away to ash, the actors half-fallen apart, and Chuck guided you upstairs slowly the bottom of the house utterly destroyed. Brenda met you at the top, her hands held out for you to take, her fingers wrapping around your forearms as you reciprocated, and she eased you the rest of the way up.

Minho was next, visible through his mask as you got closer, and he nodded his head to you, hands holding firmly onto the hose as he tried to get control over the building once again. It felt odd, like you were walking in one of those simulation arcade attractions or playing a video game, every movement you made never feeling like your own through the layers of equipment.

The ladder was already set up, balancing precariously from one window ledge to the other.

The one opposite you seemed much more secure, not yet tarnished by flames, whereas this one was uneven, the end being held down by Gally, and all the men in the room stood a little teller, springing to action as you reserved. “About time.”

“I was doing my best.” You sneered, brown eyes rolling a little at you through the cover of the glass. Gally took the board from you, tying a piece of rope to each end of it, and checking the length, and you wandered over to the window ledge, looking out and peering down at the grass below.

“I’m going to go over fist, and secure it at the other end for you, then you come over. We get him on the board, send him back. Gally and Chuck will take him out to the ambo’. You’ll go across next, Minho will hold the ladder for you, and I’ll come last, you got it?”

You could only nod your head, feeling like the information was going in one ear and out of the other, and your head spun a little as you watched Thomas climb up and out of the window, crawling his way across the divide in a fast shuffle, no hesitation present, jumping right into the action.

He pried the window open, a precarious balancing act that made your breath hitch in your throat as the ladder-bridge wobbled, before he was slipping inside. Turning back and waving his hands out, Gally sent the board across, a piece of string pulled tighter, and now, you understood what the string had been for, the length reaching all the way from one house to the other, even when the board was taken inside and laid on the floor.

You were next, hands placed on the edge of the window, and jumping back a little as still fighting flames from the lower floors roared up at you. Your back pressed to Gally’s chest, and he placed a shoulder on your upper arm, the tank between you both that had collided with his chest making him huff, but he squeezed reassuringly and pushed your forward again.

“Any time today would be great, (Y/L/N).”

“I’m fucking scared, okay? Give me a damn minute, this isn’t what I do, I don’t go into the fires!” You yelled, hands forming fists as you tried to contain yourself, and Thomas didn’t say anything else after that. You climbed up, one knee pressed to metal that was already beginning to get warm, you could feel it through the protective pants you wore, and your hands sealed around the edges. Bringing the other own up, you found yourself kneeling over a twenty-foot drop directly into a fire from two windowsills, one of which was crumbling. “Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck..”

“You’re doing great, alright?”

His voice was much softer this time, your head snapping up, and while one hand was still holding onto the ladder, the other was reaching out, pointing a little ahead of one of your hands.

“One rung at a time, alright? You can do this, c’mon. This man needs your help.”

The brace you had clipped to your back swung a little, your body moving as your instinct to catch it kicked in, and the ladder rocked, a small shriek leaving your lips. The encouragement he gave you was a nice alternative to the constant feuding, but it was more the other words he’d said that gave you the confidence to go on. Someone’s life was in your hands, and you’d be damned if you took so long being scared that he died before you could help him. Picking up motion, you did as he said, one rung at a time as you moved out toward the middle of the ladder.

“That’s it, nice work.” He nodded, pointing at other spots to put your hands, before lifting his own, offering a thickly gloved hand to you, and you hesitated for only a moment, pausing, before reaching out to take it, and he gripped onto you tightly. “See? I got you, you’re fine.”

He tugged you closer, inching you the rest of the way forwards, and helping you down from the window at the other side, until you were balancing on your feet again. This room wasn’t yet on fire, but smoke was filling it, beginning to seep between the floorboards as an ominous and foreboding orange glow was present, the floor burning away beneath your very feet.

As told, there he was, the old man on his bed, looking as peaceful as though he were sleeping, and you made your way over to him. Smoothing along his body, you tried lifting one of his eyelids, barely being able to get a soft grip through the gloves, and struggling to hold down the tip of your keychain flashlight.

“I can’t do a damn thing with these stupid gloves on!”

“Don’t you da-” You didn’t care, stripping them off and pushing them into his hands as you hissed, not having realised just how much these clothes were shielding you from, the heat in the room almost unbearable on your flesh as your skin tingled. Checking his eyes and his pulse, you found movement of his pupils, slower than ideal but still there, and a low but prominent pulse under his skin.

“He’s okay, we’re all good here.” Thomas only nodded his head, handing the gloves back to you urgently, and moving to unclip the neck support from your pack as you worked. Sealing the plastic contraption around his neck to keep his head secure, you rolled him onto his side, the board coming next, rope beginning to pull tighter as you tried to cross the room to reach him, before finally getting him situated.

Strapped down and sealed on tight, you helped Thomas begin to place him delicately on the ladder, and once again fear was taking you over completely. There were flashing cameras, a group of people far bigger than it had been when you were on the street, and a final ambulance ready to offer assistance.

“That’s a lot of people.” You mumbled, feeling a hand on your shoulder as Thomas pulled you back and away from the window.

“Then don’t look.” He tossed you a glance, before helping Gally begin to inch the man across the bridge, rope always pulled tight to keep him secure, and it felt like lifetimes passed as you watched him go, inch by inch, until Chuck was taking a hold of the top half, pulling it further inside until Gally could take the other, and just like that, the man was safe.

Minho took their place, the man on the stretcher disappearing into the smoke with both of the taller firefighters as Thomas was stuck with you, and you shook yourself out, trying to rid yourself of tension and patting yourself down to check everything was okay.

“Don’t pay any attention to them, okay?” Hands found your arms, turning you to look at him, looking up through the glass to find his eyes. “They’re a distraction, just focus on my voice, and Minho’s voice, that’s it.”

“Okay.”

“Okay? You ready?”

You weren’t sure you’d ever really be ready to crawl over a pit of fire on an unstable bridge between two burning buildings, but you nodded anyway, and climbed up onto the frame. One inch at a time, you made your way across, whimpering a little under your breath with every shake and jolt it made as the windowsill finally started to collapse. You wanted to be fast but cautious, keeping it steady without freezing up, and there was a point in the middle where the hands Thomas had placed on your hips to keep you steady slipped away, but you were not yet in reach of Minho, and you were completely on your own.

Two feet, and then you’d be able to reach Minho, to let him pull you inside and back to reasonable safety, and you were pretty sure that after this, you were never going to be offering to go into a burning building again. One foot, and Minho was lifting his hands up to you, the gentle but firm mumblings to hurry up echoing from Thomas, and then a hand wrapped around yours, giving you the confidence and security to speed up.

When your feet finally touched the ground once again, you were letting out a happy sigh, a kind of high racing through your system at the relief of being safe once again making you feel like you could float in clouds. You turned back, watching Thomas adjust his gloves, the flames in the room behind him beginning to grow as the floorboards started to give way at the cracks, and Minho was holding the ladder secure, but the flames were growing higher, and the charred wood was beginning to give way.

“Lieutenant, you need to speed up, this window is going to give way soon.”

“My glove won’t tie.” He muttered, trying the toggle again, but the plastic clip seemed to have snapped, and as he tried to fasten it again, the creaking of the wood made his head snap up. Surveying the scene, the ladder was already sitting at a slightly uneven angle now, and you swallowed thickly at the sight, now wishing you’d had the bravery to move a little faster. “Right, well, guess we’re going as it is.”

Climbing his way up onto the bars, his body was tilted, slumping a little towards the flames as the team below moved the hose, trying to spray the flames enough to keep them down, but without creating smoke that would blind him. Stepping back, you crossed your arms over your chest, anxiety taking over, and you brought a thumb up to your mouth to chew on the nail from habit. Your thumb hit against the glass of your mask, a low curse on your lips as a single strike of pain moved along your arm.

Thomas was only halfway across, before the ladder was shaking again, a chunk of burned wood falling away as the ladder shuddered and fell, falling onto its side a little further, and Thomas had only stuck to the rung by hooking each foot into the rungs, body leaning into the flames a little more. The sirens, the ambulance pulling away and the shouts of those outside, the burning of flames, creaking of wood, spraying of water, all fell away. It was terrifying, to think that if you had just moved a little fast he could be back by now, if you’d made it to the door to leak the gas faster, or notice the neighbour a little sooner that nobody would have been on a ladder at all.

“Thomas, hurry up!”

“Yeah, thanks for that, I was thinking I’d take it even slower!” He huffed into the comm, and you weren’t sure where your own words had come from, but the desperation and fear of losing a team member had you on edge.

The window was giving easy, the closer he got and the more weight was on that spot, the more it began to crumble, and you saw it give way before it registered, Minho’s hands leaving the handles of the ladder to grab for Thomas, and you heard the grunt he let out as the side of his body collided with the building.

The ladder clattered to the ground outside, and just like that, plumes of smoke were rising as the flames were finally put out, black clouds rising up and blocking your view of the other house as an acrid smell filled the air. Minho had one hand, pulling him, up, and the other latched onto the windowsill, scrabbling. His wrist was exposed, a raw gap between the sleeve and the glove that wouldn't fasten, and you managed to find action on shaky legs, stepping forwards and wrapping your hands around his wrists, helping to pull him up and through the window, protecting the exposed patch.

He rolled over the floor, a loud banging as he collapsed down onto it, splayed out across the floor and relieved. One hand lay across his chest, and your legs felt weak and wobbly from the exertion and adrenaline of the day, and you leaned on the wall for support. Minho patted at your shoulder, a weak laugh on his lips, and the floorboards and you creaked with the weight of Thomas shifting, before you could sense eyes on you, cracking them open to see him standing before you.

“Go, c’mon. This house is still dangerous, you need to get out.”

You nodded, body trembling a little as you tried to control it, following in his steps as he led the way, thick smoke and glowing ass as the house was destroyed, melted plastic and synthetics, like some kind of horror scene, and you supposed that, in a way, it was. When your feet finally found the grass again, you stripped your helmet off from your head, mask following, a gasping breath as you felt the cool breeze sweeping over your skin, and you felt practically layered in sweat. Making your way back to where your pack and your shoes were still laying by one of the firetrucks, you leaned against it, sinking down to the floor as you finally let the tension go.

Your elbows propped up on bent knees, holding up your head as it fell forwards, and you let out a shaky breath, finding that you weren’t a fan of the fire scene. It wasn’t what you were used to, last-minute decisions in burning houses weren’t your forte. You were good with medicine, and you knew how to save lives, that was your skill. Burning buildings and heights over a sinister drop to your death, not so much.

A scuffing sounded beside you, and you looked up, frowning at Thomas as he let his jacket fall down his arms, the red and burned flesh of his wrists shown to you more obviously. He placed it back inside, before turning to you, hand held out to take your helmet and mask from you, silently as he put them back in the correct places within the van. Next up was your jacket, and you stretched your legs out before yourself to lean forwards and strip it off, handing it up to him, and shivering and the sudden cold that took you over as you were down the layer you’d grown accustomed to.

Leaning forwards to undo the boots, you pulled one foot forward, beginning to struggle with the laces that Chuck had down for you, unbelievably tight, and huffing as you finally got it untangled. “You did good in there.”

You paused from where you were loosening the laces down, turning to look up at him, and he wasn’t paying any attention to you, but he did catch your eye for a split second. “Thank you. I hated every second of it.”

His lips flicked up at the sides, and he nodded his head, moving to take a seat in front of you, and pulling your other foot to sit before him on the concrete and beginning to undo the knots. “I can tell, but you pulled through as a part of the team, it was good work.”

“I think this is the longest you’ve ever been nice to me.”

“I’m not being nice, I’m simply giving you feedback. If I wanted to be nice to you, I would be.” He muttered, pulling both boots from your feet and standing back up, leaving you to wince as your heels hit the ground, a shock running up the nerves along your legs. “Hurry up and get yourself up, Brenda is already rolling up the hose, we’re going to leave soon. You’ll have to get a lift back with us.”

“Sure thing, Lieutenant.” Your eyes rolled, standing up to push the baggy pants down your legs, leaving you once again in your paramedic trousers, and kicking them off at your ankles, leaving them in a pile at his feet, a sickly sweet smile on your lips as you bent to collect your bag and your shoes. “I’ll get a lift with Truck.”

You gave him a small salute, walking right past him as his stare flickered between you and the pile of clothing, a growl on his lips, but you were already walking away from him. Gally was more than happy to offer you a lift, holding open the back of the truck, and settled down into the leather seats, the smell of sweat and burn lingering in the cabin. Tying up one shoe, you switched feet, sorting the other out, before slumping into the chair.

Fry was the first back, up into the front seat as he restarted the vehicle, the engine under your feet chugging to life, and as the humming of the engine started up, the pounding behind your eyes becoming apparent, rubbing at your eyes as they closed. Winston was next, sliding into the seats opposite you, Clint following, and you slumped out as they began to discuss the day.

It had been exhausting, everything in you was screaming out for sleep, and with only a few hours left of your shift, you knew you would be collapsing into sleep from the moment you got home tonight. The day had been taxing both mentally, physically and emotionally, and as Chuck squeezed in beside you, your head fell to his shoulder.

“You’re all sweaty.” You grumbled, and he only laughed, the vehicle charging into motion once Gally was in the front seat and the rest of the Truck team were on board, your eyes sliding closed.

The journey seemed to slip away, the headache in your skull pounding away, and you managed to find your phone in your backpack, bringing it up at one point to text Newt and find out where he was, only to discover he'd been back at the Firehouse for almost half an hour, and was probably eating the cereal bars you’d hidden.

The time slipped away, and you felt as though you’d almost drifted off, against your own intentions, jerking up a little as the truck came to a halt.

“You’re tired, huh?”

“Yes.” You muttered, groaning as you forced yourself to your feet and stepped down from the platform of the truck, leaving the men to swap out their shoes and hang up their equipment, and Newt had his arms held out to you with a grin on his face, cooing at you as you stumbled forward. “Stop making fun of me.”

“Someone looks exhausted!” He practically sang the words, and you groaned, slumping into him as his arms wrapped around you, and he laughed in your ear while rubbing a hand up and down your back. He eased you for a second, going quiet as he held you, before pulling back, and squeezing at your arms. “How’s that headache?”

“Raging.”

“I got you some painkillers out.” He mumbled, one arm wrapping over your shoulders and guiding you over to the truck. He had a hot bucket of disinfectant and the mop, and as well as all the cleaning equipment, the smell of chemicals already present and showing off that he’d already started on the work to be done. “If you keep me company, I’ll clean the ambo’.”

“You’re a blessing.” He only nodded, handing you two tablets and a plastic cup of water, you chugged them down, all but crawling through the van to slump into the front seat, legs curled up a little as you rested against the still warm fabric.

The rhythmic motions of the mop along the floor created a soft noise, one that was steady enough to lull you into sleep, and even from in here, you could hear the loud ticking of the clock on the wall outside, every single second passing by being counted off in your head as you matched your heartbeat to it.

“Newt, I need a favour.” You groaned, keeping it internal as you bit on the inside of your cheek at the grating sound of a voice belonging to the person you arguably despised most in the world right now. “I got a little burned up, so I need some treatment.”

“I’m busy right now, Tommy. (Y/N) can do it.”

“I’m perfectly fine, I’ll just wait.” You cowered a little behind your chair as you hoped Newt would let him go, but your meddling blond friend tutted his lips, putting down the mop, and you already knew what was coming.

“Not with those burns you won’t. You don’t mind, right, love?”

“I really, really do mind.” You raised a hand over your head, flipping the pair off, but waiting only a second longer, before standing up. Making your way through the vehicle, you were at least feeling a little better, even if the weight of the equipment you’d worn, the heat and the terrifying near-death experience was still making you feel physically drained, your almost-nap and painkillers had taken care of you mentally. “Fine, but you can come here. I’m not standing up.”

You collapsed down on the edge of the van, a white vest-clad chest filling your view as he came to stand before you, and you reached for your bag, Grabbing at the medkit inside, Newt snorted, hopping down and moving away to empty the mop bucket, whistling obnoxiously. Pulling on a fresh pair of rubber gloves, you wiggled your fingers a little, latex snapping against your wrist as you let the edge go, before moving onto the job at hand.

Doing an assessment of his injuries, you sighed, letting his hand go to sit in the space between you both, to find both the types of disinfectant. Holding up one canister and one clear bottle, a coppery coloured liquid inside, he looked between them both, brows furrowed, before looking back to you. “Which do you want?”

“What’s the difference?”

“This one-” You held up the can, shaking it a little. “-is a foam, it stings a bit more, but it makes a cool covering that makes it feel better. But this one-” You shook the bottle, the liquid inside sloshing a little as a layer of bubbles built up. “-is just a liquid, doesn’t hurt as much, but won’t take the heat out.”

“I literally could not care less. I just want to get something to eat, and go back to sleep.” You shrugged, grabbing a pad of cotton and tipping some of the liquid onto it, making sure the soft bundle was soaked enough, before folding his fingers into a fist, and beginning to clean at the skin, ignoring the hiss on his lips.

“I made you a plate of food, from breakfast this morning. It’s in the fridge.”

You jumped a little as you heard the aww-ing from across the room, both of your heads turning to look at Newt as he leaned on the cabinets not far away, arms crossed over his chest as he was busy with absolutely fuck-all, and you scowled at him.

“You made me food?”

Thomas’ voice was whispered, and you only glanced up at him for a second, before dipping your head in a series of slow nods, confirming his question, and reaching for some burn cream. Smearing it on your fingers, you rubbed it against the back of your hand, warming it up until it was longer as stiff, and rubbing it onto his skin.

“Thanks, that was nice of you.”

“I’m not being nice, I’m simply doing my job.” The neutral expression on his face dropped into a scowl as you grinned, using his own words against him. Switching to a set of wrappings, you adjusted his arm in front of you, placing the edge of the gauze between his thumb and forefinger, you sealed it down over unblemished skin with bandage tape. “You know, it’s actually in my job description to keep the firefighters in peak health.”

With each layer of bandaging, you added a layer of cooling spray, and he grunted under his breath. “You couldn't just accept a compliment?”

“Well, you made it very clear that we aren’t nice to one another.”

“You’re being petty.” He grouched, snatching his hand back from you as soon as the wrapping was sealed up, one more glare at you before he was glaring at Newt, and walking back out of the room and ignoring you both, especially Newt’s laughing. He made his way over to you, still cracking up, his hand wrapped around his stomach, and you raised a brow at him as you began to pack everything away.

“What’s so funny, chuckles?”

“You and Thomas. Your bickering,” You turned to him, shaking your head as you tried to find an argument for his meddling, and pulling off the gloves from your hands. “You’re like a married couple.”

“If married couples argued like Thomas and I did, they’d be getting divorced.”

“I don’t even think you know what you’re arguing about anymore. You’re just getting at each other, now.” He shrugged, pulling you up from where you were sitting, in order to lock up the doors of the ambulance. “You just got off on the wrong foot, but mark my words, you won’t hate each other forever. I already know it.”

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever you say, Newt.”

#thomas #thomas x reader #thomas/reader #smoke and fire #SAF #tomuary #tom-uary #tommy month #thomas/reader smut #thomas x reader smut #thomas the maze runner #dylan o'brien #dylan obrien #dylan obrien x reader #dylan obrien/reader #dylan obrien x reader smut #dylan obrien/reader smut #dylan obrien thomas #dylan obrien the maze runner

[strawberryhwa-writes]

wicked.

[ college au! ] unrequited love! wooyoung x reader (angst)

sypnosis: there were three words you didn't like hearing from jung wooyoung but he had to say it to you every single night.

warnings: implied fwb relationship

word count: 698

(c) strawberryhwa-writes : not repost or translate my work on any platform

—

love is wicked. wicked when it convinces you to love the goodness of a man who will never love you. blinding you from getting frustrated at his sweet hollow words. in the end you were never meant to be. a fling, he said months ago which became something more, but something less than love.

you hear a knock from the door at the middle of a quiet night. 5am, the digital clock reminded you, as you dragged your asleep feet to the awaiting door. heart pounding, you twisted the knob open, seeing an exhausted figure, wooyoung in the door.

it was always like this. “what’s wrong?” you asked, knowing deeply the predictable answer. he stumbled, mumbling in audibly in response, tipsy and reeked of alcohol (probably from yet another party he attended), he fell right into your embrace.

warmth. “let me crash at your apartment today.” he added, the words hinted something else. but he was jung wooyoung, how could you deny him?

as every other day, you whispered, “okay.” because of the fluttering in your stomach every time he relies on you. but deep inside, buried by countless lies, you were well aware he would never return these feelings.

you still remembered the first time you met him in college. he had an energy which drew people into him, it was hypnotic. swarmed by a group of students, the loud chatter echoed around the room. his dark hair messily styled into a middle part, eyes gleaming as he laughed with the others. gaze trailing towards you, he tilted his head before saying ecstatically, “are you in this class too? never seen you before, my name’s wooyoung.”

giving him a shy smile, you waved at him, “(y/n), nice to meet you too.”

then at a party the next day, everything went by as a blur until the very moment he kissed you.

when he leaned in for a kiss, it was a dance between lips on lips, soft and slow like rumba, with a tiny spark tingling the fingertips which graze him ever so slightly.

breaking off the kiss, wooyoung cradled your face (almost lovingly), his lips curved into a tiny smile, “i love you.”

"i love you too."

-

it's always the night, which lured in feelings. complicated and unwanted feelings, like tonight. you let him fall into your embrace, his warmth almost scorching your skin.

it hurts. he mumbled incoherently, but he always said the same three words in your arms at night.

as always, you replied, “i love you too.” it hurt. it hurt because you knew those three letters he utters everyday never mattered. when the night slips away and the sun yawns, awake from slumber, he slips away between your finger tips. those three words remain as a forgotten promise as his lips dances on another's the next day.

he was never yours in the first place.

you still remembered the first time he opened up on his reasons. “i’ve never really shared a healthy relationship with family and friends. people were always looking for something from me. sex, platonic love, you name it, but they never reciprocated it.”

he continued, voice faltering as the corners of his eyes brimmed with tears. “i’m really sorry, (y/n). i know i've messed up, and our relationship isn't healthy. i love you, but i can’t seem to break this cycle.” wooyoung said frustratedly, burying his head into his hands.

those three words again.

you softly rubbed his shoulder, “we can walk through it together slowly.”

but how wrong you were, to ever believe he would change. perhaps his ideas were love were skewed in the first place, or he was double faced and sought out for comfort selfishly, not being able to reciprocate it. maybe it was a little bit of both.

you were caught in the net too, unable to cut him off.

it hurts.

it still does.

caught in a loop of wicked love, even though both of you were not willing to escape, or let go, because of the three words the both said to one another months ago.

“i love you.”

you despised it with your heart. love is truly wicked.

#ateez imagines #ateez headcannons #ateez drabbles #ateez angst #wooyoung #i don't write angst often so wowie a challenge for meee #i had fun writing it though! :0

[phoebe-of-ivalice]

FFXIV Write 2021 Prompt #8

Adroit (adjective) clever or skillful in using the hands or mind.

The Hunted: Part 2 (cut placed due to length)

Phoebe paced the floor of the Rogue’s Guild nervously. She’d been there all night, lurking in the corner as she waited to see her old mentor, Jacke. She’d need his advice on her current situation if she wanted to find this Hunter before… she shuddered at the thought of what any of it could mean. The man sent after her the last evening was obviously a decoy who was meant to put fear in to her mind. It angered her that it had worked so well. She’d need to get ahead of her enemy if she wanted to protect herself.

Finally, around 5am Jacke came stumbling in, smelling of cheap perfume and plenty of booze. If she didn’t catch him now, she never would. Phoebe stepped into his path, blocking him from his room where he’d sleep the entire day away. He paused for a moment and a confused look crossed his face. Who dared to stand in his way? He stared at her chest for a good solid minute before he spoke up. “Hold on… I know… I know these tits,” Jacke said. He finally glanced up at Phoebe, who was rolling her eyes. “Ah, Phoebe! What brings ye to my side of this here fine city? ‘Ere to pay your respects to yer favorite guild master, eh?” He waggled his eyebrows at her. She shoved his shoulder playfully as she groaned. Under normal circumstances, she’d have made a joke in return, but right now there were more pressing matters. “Jacke, I need your help. I’m in a spot of trouble,” she whispered to him once he’d stopped laughing. He seemed to sober up enough at that, nodding and grabbing her lightly by the arm. He guided her into a side room, as close to an office as the man had. He shut and locked the door behind them, indicating for her to have a seat. “So what’s got you runnin’ back ‘ere to ol’Jacke for help? Ye was always one to ‘elp yerself as I recall. Gave ye that pair o’fine stabbers and off ye went.” Jacke has never quite let go of her leaving the Rogue’s guild to run off to the Far East. He liked the shinobi well enough; even learned a thing or two himself from them. She had been his favorite for quite some time, in a number of ways, and he was sorry to see her leave. “One of my contacts has been missing for days Jacke. They aren’t like that, one of my most dependable in fact. Had some vital information about my next target they’d wanted to tell me in person. Then last night some creep followed me down to the wharf. Had to kill him before I could get anything out of him. The body fell into the water, so it’s either gone out with the tide or the guard found him. The only thing he said was that someone was hunting me. Not sure if I should be terrified or flattered,” she chuckled, trying to cover the worry in her tone. Jacke sat across from her, mulling over the information she’d provided. He leaned back in his chair and scratched his chin. Phoebe arched an eyebrow in his direction as time seemed to come to a halt. She cleared her throat, bringing Jacke back to the present. He beamed at her, a sign that nothing good could come from this conversation. “I ever tell ye about my favorite stabbers? Sharp as can be, inlaid with gold and emerald in the hilts. Right beauts they were… til I made a fool of meself an’ lost ‘em in a bet to Captain Rhoswen. She’s been a right witch about it ever since. I dinna think I’d ever hear of ‘em again. Well, one of me boys was beddin’ a Sanguine Siren the other day. Told him where she keeps my lovely stabbers locked in a safe. Now, if someone were to recover those for me, I may be willin’ to owe ‘em a favor of sorts,” he made his terms quite clear to her. Always one to want his back scratched before helping someone else… he never changed. “Fine. Where is this safe then?” she asked, pursing her lips to express her annoyance. “Ahha! You’re the best for the job. Now, the safe is in the cellar of the Missing Member. You’ll need your lockpicking kit I gave ye. Still got it, yeah?” Phoebe nodded her head. It was with her all the time practically. She listened to the rest of the instructions and Jacke started to ramble in his inebriation. She held a hand out to him, letting him

know she had enough to go off of and was ready to set out. “I need to get this over with, if I take too long that only gives this Hunter more time,” she quipped, closing the door behind her. Back on the docks, she pulled her hood into place. She scanned the area for anything suspicious but there was no one to be seen. She'd need to wait until it was dark out if she wanted her best chance at getting in unseen. She’d need to figure out how she could drop two stories below the main floor of the Missing Member without being seen. She’d need to cause a distraction most likely. Then when everyone was busy, she’d have to climb the roof and drop down the back of the building before anyone saw her. It would be tight but if anyone could do it, it would be her. First things first…. She needed to find a rat.

———————————————————————

One angry squeaking box later, Phoebe climbed up the stairs to the Upper Decks and made her way over to the Missing Member eatery. The rat she’d managed to catch would be good and angry by the time she’d release it into the front door of the restaurant. She casually walked across the main courtyard, and over the bridge to the doorway. Luckily there were only a few guests standing outside that were too busy talking to even notice her. She cracked open the door, sliding the box in on its side to allow the creature to escape. She stood off to the side as far as she could and waited.

It didn’t take long until a few screaming guests charge out the door, followed by screams from the inside. The few people who had been waiting decided it would be better to make themselves scarce. It was the perfect time for her to move. Phoebe nimbly climbed up to the rooftop, grasping onto the spire as she secured a rope from her pack around it. Lowering herself over the edge, she repelled her way down the sheer side of the white wall. She chuckled as she neared the window of the kitchen, yelling and cursing could still be heard from within as they chased the rat around. It worked better than she’d hoped.

Down two more stories, she found the small window Jacke had described to her earlier. He’d need to consider himself lucky if Phoebe was able to clear the frame with how small it appeared. Using a small glass-breaking tool, she cleared out one of the panes and flipped the lock. She pushed the frame open and stuck her head inside to make sure no one else was around. It was dark inside, the only light was the small beam of moonlight falling through the window.

Phoebe squeezed through the opening, only slightly panicking as her hips stuck for a mere second. It certainly wasn't a place frequented by people, as she noted the thick coating of dust on most of the items stashed away. Old paintings stacked across one side of the room, several locked trunks, and a large safe took up most of the small space. A ladder on the far side of the room most likely led to a trap door up to the next floor.

The safe would be simple enough for her to open. It had a classic style lock, instead of the fancy combination locks many of the nobles had in the wealthier cities. Phoebe removed her lockpicking tools, rolling the case out on the floor so she could select the right ones. Her hands worked quickly, one long ear pressed closely to the safe to listen carefully to each successful click. She deftly tested each tumbler and slid in the torque pick to prevent them from falling back in place. As she heard the last tumbler fall into place, she pulled the crank handle open on the safe... and an alarm sounded from the chest. How the hells had they rigged that up?

Phoebe rifled through the safe as quickly as she could. There were a number of small treasures in the safe, and Phoebe's fingers itched to pocket more than she needed. There was no time now thanks to the pounding of running feet on the floorboards above. The daggers were in a small box on the bottom shelf, and she shoved the beautiful knives into her pocket inside her coat. She couldn't resist grabbing a lovely ruby hairpin that sat in the very back corner as a reward for herself. The pirates above were now fighting to get the trap door open, as the lock seemed to have rusted shut.

Phoebe shimmied out the window and scaled the wall as fast as she could. As her coattails disappeared over the roof, a very angry Captain Rhoswen was shouting obscenities out the broken window below. By the time the captain had made it to the main floor, Phoebe was long gone.

Phoebe dropped the daggers on the table with a loud clang. Jacke had been asleep, chin on his chest and feet propped on the table. The noise made him jump and he unsheathed his knives as he cursed.

"Settle down, you ol' fool," Phoebe grumbled, "There are your stabbers back. I hope you have some information that was worth my time getting those."

"Aye, that I do. Found out sumthin' while you was out. Your contact is dead, strung up in a tree jus' outside Ul'dah. Might want to make yer way there. Body was taken by the Flames for inspection."

Phoebe sighed, "Thanks Jacke, I better go catch the last airship for the night. And watch out for Rhoswen, she's going to be spittin' fire."

"Thanks lass I... wait what do you mean?! Phoebe wait!" she closed the door behind her with a wicked smile as Jacke called after her. She had an airship to catch and no time to waste.

part 3>

#FFxivWrite2021 #FFxviWrite #prompt 8 #adroit #The hunted part 2 #oc: phoebe venatrix #did my best to write Jacke but I suck at it

[cuddlepilefics]

Do you even lift?

Fandom: Stray Kids

Sickie: Changbin

Caregiver: Chan

 No one's POV.:

Changbin had come under quite a bit of fire lately. He had successfully gained weight and loved how cute his squishy cheeks looked. Sadly, they came at a cost, resulting in the rapper being criticized for his belly fat. Would he cut down on food, he'd lose his cute cheeks again, so that left only one solution: more exercise to reveal his abs and hopefully still keep his cheeks. That's easier said than done though, because his schedule was already tightly packed. The only times he managed to go to the gym were after his official schedule late into the night. Changbin wasn't one to complain, so he'd take what he could get even if that meant salvaging all the discipline he could find and forcing himself to push past his exhaustion to trade sleep for exercise. The calculation was easy for him: ‘If I leave the studio at 2am, I’ll make it to the gym at around 2:30am. Exercise for 90minutes and leave the gym around 4am. Walk home and have a shower, then I could be in bed around 5am and get up to 3 hours of sleep before we have to get up again.’

He had been following this routine for the past three weeks and he was beginning to see the first changes. Mostly in his arms though, not in his abs but he was building muscles, so his abs would probably grow too, just a bit slower than his arms. The other members noticed it too and Changbin received many compliments for the size of his biceps. On the down side, he constantly felt sore and could barely remember what life was like without feeling his muscles burn with every movement. His appetite had also changed. It was so much bigger than before, which only made sense with how much he was asking from his body. Although he had deliberately decided not to diet, he also wouldn’t increase his food intake just because he felt hungry all the time. What Changbin failed to understand was that his body was desperately begging for energy, either from sleep or from some extra calories. Since the rapper gave his body neither, it was only a matter of time till he had to feel his body’s wrath. He kept spacing out, which was probably worsened by low blood-sugar levels because he decided to consume less carbohydrates and eat healthy fats instead. One day, he almost fell asleep during one of 3racha’s production sessions. Both Chan and Jisung had mocked him for it but were mostly worried because their friend had started to come home even later than Chan. They had laughed it off together and Changbin had been forced to skip his workout that day, being dragged home to get some sleep instead. That didn’t mean he wouldn’t exercise twice as hard the next day though to make up for the missed workout.

Dance practices have developed a kind of love-hate relationship with Changbin. He loved them because they were also a form of exercise but he hated them because with how slow his brain had become from how run down he was, he was always a few beats behind on the choreography. If it seemed like it was frustrating for the dance-racha that was doing their best to teach them the new dance routines, it was so much more frustrating for Changbin. He was pushing himself incredibly hard to erase something that he was criticized for, only to mess up and be criticized for something else. Over the last week, he had noticed that he could go over the choreography about five times before getting dizzy and messing the steps up even more, so he tried to use the first few rounds to show his members that he wasn’t doing that bad, going all out and using up his remaining energy. In the breaks, Felix often sat with him, massaging his neck and shoulders. The Aussie could see how tense the other’s posture was and tried to give him as much relief as possible. Changbin appreciated it, although at that point there was nothing that Felix could do to make him hurt less. It was comforting and it at least took away the stress for a few minutes and helped him relax mentally, even though his muscles couldn’t really relax anymore.

“Guys, since our schedule ends early today and Channie-hyung said there wouldn’t be a 3racha meeting today, can we maybe go out for dinner tonight? It’d even be my treat”, Minho offered. The group had barely had the time to relax or have fun together. Changbin scratched his neck awkwardly, admitting: “I was actually looking forward to visit the gym early today.” – “It’s fine, you guys can go. I’ll go with Changbin because it had been ages since I had the time to exercise apart from our dance practices”, Chan announced. Yes, he had barely been working out lately for the lack of time but his main intention was to keep an eye on his dongsaeng. The leader was afraid the younger was overworking himself. Their plan was soon settled, though a few youngers, especially Felix, tried to talk Changbin out of going to the gym but his insecurities and body image made it impossible for the rapper to skip. His head was already hurting before they left for the gym but if he thought about it, it had been hurting for the last two days already. A good night’s rest would probably fix it, so Changbin was glad he’d be home a bit earlier tonight. It’s not like he had the intention to harm himself with his excessive exercising but he failed to listen to his body telling him to stop.

On the way to the gym, Chan had asked many questions on his dongsaeng’s workout routine to figure out how hard the younger was actually pushing his limits. He was shocked when he finally grasped the extent and tried to give the rapper a few hints here and there, that he might want to think about this habit. Changbin either wasn’t getting the hint that his hyung was telling him to stop, which was possible considering how out of it he was, or he was unwilling to admit to himself, that he was slowly running his body into the ground. Chan soon gave up and realized the younger had to see for himself that what he was doing was hurting him. That didn’t mean the leader wasn’t prepared to be there and pick up the pieces when Changbin would reach his breaking point. For now, he tried to keep the mood light. They took a few pictures and compared the weights they’d be using for their individual routines, before putting in their earphones and getting started.

It all seemed to be going well. At least that was what it looked like to Chan. Changbin soon removed his earphones because he blamed the stereo-sound for the spinning in his head and his balance-issues. To his dismay, he had to accept that the change barely had an effect on his struggles. He was also shaking harder from the strain than he remembered himself shaking the previous day but what did he expect with the amount of sleep he was running on. Changbin finished up with his push-ups and stood up with the weights in his hands. Upon shifting his position upright, black spots started to dance in his vision but he was used to it. It had happened a few times over the course of the past week. He’d just drop down to one knee and wait till his vision cleared before getting up again. Changbin’s back was facing Chan, so the leader couldn’t see his discolored face, or the cold sweat that was dripping from his forehead, running down his temples. The rapper had been kneeling there for quite a while already, longer than he usually needed to, so Chan removed his earphones too and teased: “Do you even lift, mate?”

Changbin shook his head and turned his head towards Chan. He was mumbling something that resembled ‘h-hyung’, but Chan only saw his lips moving. The leader didn’t need to hear him though, the look on his face, combined with his skincolor, told Chan all he needed to know. Cursing silently, the oldest dropped his weights and rushed over to his friend. He wrapped his arms around Changbin from his back and gently pulled him backwards to sit down properly. Changbin defeatedly let go of his weights and leaned back against his hyung’s chest. “It’s okay. Just take deep breaths and the dizziness will go away”, Chan assured, holding the younger against his chest so he wouldn’t fall over. Taking a shaky breath in, Changbin failed and his breathing remained fast and shallow. One hand came up to clutch onto Chan’s arm, a desperate attempt to hold himself up, before it dropped back down, along with Changbin’s head that fell onto his chest as his body went slack.

For a second, Chan panicked before he collected himself, realizing he’d only be able to help the younger if he was able to keep a cool head. Carefully, the leader lowered Changbin to lie on the floor, feeling his pulse weak and fast. He got up and without his eyes ever leaving the younger, he collected his water bottle and a stack of lyric sheets. Chan sprinkled some of the water onto Changbin’s face before fanning him with the papers. To his relief, he soon heard the rapper groan and his eyes fluttered open. “Take it easy, you’re okay”, Chan promised, “Just blacked out for a second. I think we’re done exercising for today.” Changbin nodded and brought his hands up to massage his temples. Was his headache already that bad earlier? He wanted to keep up but his hyung held it down with a gentle hand on his chest, asking: “Please stay down a little longer, just until your face has taken on a healthier shade.” Changbin nodded again, too drained to respond verbally.

After resting for another two minutes, Changbin started to feel cold, his body not having the energy left to sustain his body temperature. Chan noticed the slight shiver and went to collect his hoodie. “Here, you can try to sit up and put this on”, the leader said with a comforting smile. He helped his dongsaeng to sit up and kept an arm around his shoulders to steady him. Changbin tiredly slipped the hoodie on, cursing his arms for burning as much as they did from the simple movement. Grabbing his towel, he dried his sweaty face. He also took a few sips of the water Chan offered him before clearing his throat and asking: “Hyung, can we go home?” The older was glad he didn’t have to argue about taking Changbin home and nodded. “Do you think you can walk or do you want a piggy back?”, he asked, studying the rapper. “Walk!” – “Alright, alright”, he laughed, pulling Changbin to his feet and wrapping one arm around his waist, while Changbin’s arm hung over his neck, “But can you give me a warning if you feel dizzy again?” – “Yeah – yeah, I think – I think I can do that”, Changbin mumbled, swaying a bit as Chan picked up both of their bags.

Their walk back to the dorm was slow and quiet and Chan was sure, the younger hadn’t fallen asleep walking. He felt a bit guilty for not stopping Changbin before it could get this bad but he also knew that if the rapper had set his mind on something, there was no stopping him. While Changbin went to their room to pick out his clothes, Chan ran him a bath. The leader was afraid his dongsaeng would slip and fall if he tried to take a shower. He let Changbin take his time and went to the kitchen to make them both some dinner. Chan had settled on making some rice with chicken to fill up their energy fast while also giving them a good amount of protein. Dishing the food onto plates, he made sure Changbin’s was heaping full. “Hey, hyung. Sorry about earlier”, Changbin apologized, walking into the kitchen with damp hair. Chan shook his head and sat him down at the table, so they could eat together, replying: “It’s alright but I hope you got your wakeup call to start listening to your body better.” Changbin nodded guiltily. “You should take the next few days to rest up because you have pushed your body way too hard. I know why you did and I’m not going to scold you because I understand your intentions but please take better care of yourself from now on”, the leader pleaded. Changbin bit his lip. It didn’t feel right to take even a day off, when it was entirely his own fault that he felt so bad. On the other hand, being able to sleep in and not having to drag his achy and wrecked body out of bed tomorrow sounded like heaven. In the end, they compromised on Changbin resting for one day and deciding afterwards if he needed another. What was sure though, was that Chan would keep a closer eye on him from now on to ensure he got the rest he needed.

#stray kids #skz #sick #sickfic #fanfic #fanfiction #whump #fluff #comfort #seo chanbin #bang chan

[cinnamon-roll-seth]

Where Were You || JJ Maybank

After staying out all night, leaving you at home worried, JJ finally comes home wasted. You’re determined to get to the bottom of why.

Contains drunk JJ, him being whiny, you being angry, lots of arguing, and some really cute fluff at the end. Also you’re John B’s sister.

You jumped and stood up hastily as the porch door slammed, watching as JJ stumbled into the house. Instantly you were hit with the smell of alcohol and weed, which you’d never found to be a very good mix, and had to fight to urge to gag.

It was 5AM and you hadn’t slept at all, being too worried about JJ to allow yourself to drift off. He’d left to go get some things from his house and hadn’t returned. You’d insisted on going to check on him but John B advised you not to, especially with his dad being there.

JJ practically lived at the chateau and you and your brother were happy to have him there. Of course it wasn’t official and he was always welcome to come and go as he pleased but normally he would tell you when he wouldn’t be staying there. The last you knew he was fully planning on coming back before he left last night and that fact that you hadn’t heard from him at all worried you.

“Oh, hey Y/N.” He slurred, nearly tripping over his own feet before falling into the couch next to you.

You crossed your arms, “JJ, you’re drunk.”

“That’s what they all say. I only took like a couple beers. Maybe two?” He answered, holding up six fingers. You rolled your eyes, not even attempting to make sense of the nonsense that had just come out of his mouth. It wasn’t even beer that you smelled on him.

“Go lay down and sober up and then you and I are going to talk.” You told him sternly.

“What are you gonna do if I don’t? Spank me? That’s my job,” He broke into a fit of drunken giggling while you once again rolled your eyes and grabbed his arm, pulling him to his feet.

“I’m serious JJ, go.” You lightly pushed him towards the hallway and he stumbled, grabbing onto the wall. You sighed, realizing that there was no way he was making it to bed without your help.

“No, I don’t want to sleep in there!” He whined as you dragged him towards the guest room, which he’d practically claimed as his own.

“Where the fuck are you going to sleep then? In the bathroom over the toilet?”

He pouted like a child and pointed towards your bedroom door. You sighed and opened the door, pulling him into your room and towards your bed.

“JJ I swear to god if you puke on my bed I’m going to murder you.” You warn, watching as he curls up underneath your comforter. He doesn’t answer and when you look back down at him he’s already sleeping, his chest rising up and down as quiet snores leave his mouth.

At that moment you hear your phone ringing and rush out to the living room, softly closing your bedroom door behind you. You grabbed your phone, which had Kie’s contact photo displayed on the screen, and pushed the answer button.

“Heard anything from JJ yet?” She asks in a concerned tone.

“Yeah. He got home a few minutes ago. He’s wasted out of his ass, I could smell the alcohol on him as soon as he walked through the door. I told him to lay down and sleep it off and that we need to talk when he’s sober enough to pronounce my name properly.” You answer, walking out onto the porch so you don’t wake him up.

“Are you gonna chew his ass out?”

“Hell yeah I am. But first I’m gonna make sure he’s okay. That’s not like JJ, he never stays out all night like that without telling me or John B, he knows I worry. And the way he fell asleep so easily, like he was waiting until he was safe to fall asleep. I don’t know what happened, if it was something with his dad or if he ran in to Topper or Rafe or something but as soon as he’s sober enough to tell me I’m going to get it out of him.”

“Yeah somethings definitely not right. I’m just glad he’s home and safe. I gotta get ready for work. Keep me updated? Love you, bye!” She rushes before hanging up the phone. You sigh and walk back into the chateau, deciding to clean up a bit while waiting for JJ to wake up.

It’s not until nearly seven hours later when he finally comes shuffling out of your bedroom, groaning as he holds a hand to his head which you’re almost positive is absolutely throbbing in pain.

“Here, take these.” You hand him four ibuprofen, which despite being above the recommended dose, is probably the only thing that will be able to dull the hangover headache. He mumbled a ‘thanks’ before putting them in his mouth and swallowing them all at once.

He sat next to you on the couch and it was silent for a moment before you spoke softly, “Where were you JJ?”

“Y/N-“ He started but you cut him off.

“No seriously. You scared the shit out of me JJ, I didn’t sleep all night because I was worried about you.”

“I was on my way back here and ran into a couple of tourists throwing a party on the beach. They offered me a couple shots of vodka and it turned in to more shots. I’m sorry I scared you.” He shrugs and takes a sip of the water bottle you had sitting next to you.

“Bullshit. Even if you only intended to stop for ten minutes you still would’ve called me JJ. You always do.”

“I forgot okay? Jesus get off my ass.”

“So me being worried about you is me being on your ass? JJ I was up all fucking night waiting for you to come home. I was half tempted to go to your dad’s house to look for you. If you had come home an hour later I would’ve already been to the police station to file a damn report.” You snap, standing up angrily.

“Why the fuck does it matter where I was anyway? Last time I checked Y/N you’re my girlfriend, not my fucking mother. I don’t have to tell you every tiny little aspect of where I am or what I’m doing at all times. What, did you think I was out cheating?”

“Of course not you jackass! I thought you’d been jumped or something. I thought you were fucking hurt or dead while you were out getting wasted, obviously not giving a fuck about how I was feeling after you didn’t bother to come home or even call.” You scream. If John B hadn’t already left a few hours before you would’ve been worried of waking him up.

“You don’t have to worry about me. I’m not your fucking dad, I’m not just going to fucking leave and disappear!” You were taken back by his comment as he stood up so the two of you were only a few inches apart.

It was true that you worried more than you should. Your mothering instinct was high and you often tended to care more for others than yourself. You’d been taking care of John B for practically your entire life despite being thirteen months younger. After the two of you became friends with Kie, Pope, and JJ you started to care for them too and were basically deemed the mother of the group.

After your dad’s disappearance you were a wreck, obviously. You started to worry more about not only John B but the others as well. You’d find yourself calling them more frequently just to make sure they were okay. You didn’t mean to be overbearing, you just couldn’t stand to loose anybody else you love. Nobody had called out on it before now.

You stepped back, hurt evident on your face, “I never said- You know what, fine. You can do whatever the hell you want JJ, I don’t care anymore.” And with that you turned and went into your bedroom before slamming the door behind you.

“Y/N!” He called, knocking on your door a second later, “Y/N please I didn’t mean it.”

“Why did you say it then?” You called, listening to him sigh.

“I- I don’t know okay. Look I’m sorry. I just- you were making me feel suffocated and I just lashed out. I didn’t mean what I said about your dad.”

“You know that’s a touchy subject JJ. Why would you even bring him up. You’ve never done that before.” You reply softly.

“What? Y/N I’m sorry but I can’t hear you. Can I come in?”

“Yeah I guess.” You answer as he opens the door and walks in. You can tell he’s sorry by the way his face softens when he sees the tears threatening to fall from your eyes.

“Hey hey, baby I’m so sorry. I’m sorry for what I said and I’m sorry for worrying you last night. Please don’t cry.” He apologizes profusely as he rushes to you.

You shake your head softly, “Where were you? Please JJ, I want the truth.”

He sighs and lifts up his shirt, revealing large dark bruises littering his torso. Your eyes widen and you gasp quietly as you sit up quickly, looking over all the huge dark circles.

“Oh JJ,” You whisper, “What happened.”

“Turns out my dad wasn’t in too good of a mood. After he beat me senseless I waited outside for awhile until he fell asleep then I went inside and raided whatever alcohol I could find. I tried to make it home but I drank more than I should’ve and ended up just sitting by a tree hoping he didn’t find me and go for round two. I sat there for hours until the sun came up and I could finally see to make my way back.”

You didn’t say anything, instead wrapping your arms around his torso in an attempt to hug him, which you found to be a mistake as he hissed in pain and you quickly let go.

“Why didn’t you just tell me?” You ask softly, pulling him down onto the bed beside you.

He shrugs, “Didn’t want you to think I’m a dumbass. Ooh I get beat up by my alcoholic father so what do I do? Drown my sorrows in alcohol.”

“That was kind of stupid.” You tell him softly and he nods.

“Yeah I know.”

“JJ?” You ask, leaning your head on his shoulder.

“Yeah?”

“Please don’t ever scare me like that again.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it.” He whispers, planting I kiss on the top of your head.

Drunk JJ, that’s all I have to say. Also him getting so concerned when he sees you about to cry, I’m soft 🥺💕God I’m so whipped for this idiot

#jj maybank #jj maybank imagine #jj x reader #obx jj #outer banks imagine #outer banks #rudy pankow imagine #rudy pankow #multifandom #multifandom imagines #please dont let this flop

[ahockeywrites]

Chapter 2 - Edmonton, Alberta

“I cannot believe it’s our first day in Edmonton and we’re already at a hockey game,” Addison laughed. The department Addison and Simone were contracted to work at regularly attended hockey games as a group to encourage socialising outside of the workplace and had invited the girls along to meet their new colleagues.

It just so happened that one of the other girls in the department was good friends with the Oilers roster and was able to get some good seats occasionally, and this happened to be one of those nights. They had seats right next to the ice for the Senators @ Oilers match and seeing as Addison had barely paid attention to the Blues hockey lineup, she had no idea that the brother of the boy she had been ignoring for years was about to take to the ice for warm ups.

A puck hit the glass in front of Addison and she looked up to see who hit it. Standing in front of her was Brady Tkachuk. She shot him a confused look, she had no idea he even played hockey anymore let alone in the NHL. He gave her a quick smile and shouted “gimme a text, number hasn’t changed,” then he skated off.

“Wait, you know Tkachuk?” one of her new colleagues asked? This was not how Addison wanted her first day in Edmonton to go. All she wanted was an easy introduction to her new colleagues not to be bombarded with questions.

“Yeah, grew up in St Louis a few doors down from them,” Addison explained, trying to go into as little detail as possible. There was no way she could let the people she was going to be spending a lot of time with know that she used to be friends with the devil of Calgary. Her co-workers just nodded, trying to understand how she hadn’t shared this information before. To the majority of people, growing up around NHL players was the most amazing thing ever but to Addison it was the most difficult thing. She wished she didn’t block Matthew out that summer, but she knew it was best for her at that time.

The rest of the game went surprisingly well, even if Brady was on the losing end of the game. No one asked Addison anymore questions about the Tkachuk’s, which she was very thankful for but Simone had started putting the pieces together and had pretty much figured out who it was that Addison was avoiding in St Louis.

Addison did text Brady, but she waited until she had settled in to Edmonton first. Naturally, Brady had already let the entire family know who he had seen in the stands as soon as he was able to. Keith and Chantal already knew because of their closeness to Addison’s parents, Taryn was excited to know that Addison had moved and was using her degree to her advantage and Matthew said nothing. He didn’t want to believe that they now lived in the same country, let alone the same province.

Ever since that day in St Louis, Matthew had vowed never to love another woman. He couldn’t, Addison was always the only one for him. It wasn’t like he couldn’t find someone else, he always had women falling over him almost anywhere he went, but none of them lived up to Addison. Instead of trying to settle down in Calgary, he had a different woman in his bed most nights to satisfy his desires.

Simone gave it a few days too before asking about the interaction at the Rogers Place. She was almost certain that the man who Addison refused to keep in contact with was the eldest Tkachuk child but she didn’t know the whole story. She didn’t want to reopen old wounds for Addison which could be especially painful. The safest space to bring up the topic was likely to be their shared apartment and she did one night with SportsNet’s NHL coverage in the background.

“Ads,” Simone started, she was unsure of how to approach the topic so decided to stay safe to begin with, “how do you actually know Brady Tkachuk?” Addison sighed, she knew this would eventually come up and was much happier that her best friend asked her rather than any of her other colleagues because it could have made the entire graduate program very awkward.

“I wasn’t lying at the rink, he did grow up a few doors down from me in St Louis,” Addison explained, “but I spent a lot of time at their house with Chantal because mom often worked late nights and dad used to, and still does, travel with the Blues for games. I’m the same age as Matt, so it just worked well.” She hoped that she hadn’t given too much away, it was the truth, just missing a lot of detail.

“But, is there anything else that I should know? You know, you’re probably gonna see the entire family next time you’re home and if I’m with you, the whole story is appreciated?” Simone tried to get as much information out as she could without hinting that she knew who Addison was refusing to mention.

“Matt was my first kiss and then I’ve ignored him ever since,” Addison said at such speed, she wasn’t even sure she took a breath between the words. It was the first time she had admitted it to anyone aside from her parents. “And I don’t think I ever stopped liking him.”

“Babe,” Simone exclaimed, “why didn’t you say something earlier?”

“Because he’s a professional hockey hot shot and I’m me! Plus, I was going to MIT and he really doesn’t give me vibes of someone that could do long distance,” Addison said, letting a tear fall. “I thought focussing on my studies would get rid of this silly crush, but seeing him in Calgary has just made things worse.”

Addison was shocked with herself, she had never vocalised her feelings of inadequacy when compared to Matthew before. Everything that she had just said was something she had internalised for years and the only way she knew to respond to the word vomit that had come out of her mouth was to cry. Simone came over to her and just held her. She had seen Addison like this before and knew she just needed to know that someone was there for her.

The room was silent bar the commentator for the Stars v Kings game and the two were thankful that it wasn’t a Flames game. “How about, we order some Chinese food, eat ice cream and watch some terrible movies?” Simone asked, this was how Addison solved all of the boy issues that anyone encountered at college so hoped it would help. The two spent the evening watching crappy rom coms wishing they were the main character in all of them and this was able to take Matthew off of her mind at least for a day.

Work seemed to drag along for the rest of the week and Addison let it. She was spending the majority of her time in her office, which she shared with the other graduates, and kept her head down working on a new project she had been assigned. She was designing a new ball bearing and it was the most tedious thing she had ever done. College could not have prepared her to spend 40 hours a week in front of a computer designing such an essential part of a manufactured product in such detail. All Addison wanted was to finish the design and go out to the bars because it was a Friday night and she needed a beer. Eventually, Simone and Addison were able to head home and get ready for a little night out in Edmonton.

It took a few hours for them to get showered, changed and eat something because they knew that drinking on an empty stomach was a bad idea. Addison chose to pair a deep green bodysuit with black jeans and heeled boots whilst Simone chose a flowery jumpsuit with small heels. They both knew they looked good and that gave them the confidence to head out with a smile. The Uber they had called arrived and they quickly threw back a vodka shot each. The night was cold but the bars calling their names were warm as hell.

The number of bars showing Calgary games was low, but apparently not zero because the first one they arrived at showed the Flames thrashing the Bruins and as soon as Addison looked up at the screen, she saw the baby blue eyed, curly haired boy she had been trying to ignore the life of for years.

“He’s everywhere,” Addison complained, “even in a city that supposedly hates him. I can’t seem to get away from him.” Simone shot her a look of sympathy, knowing that everything Addison had done was protect herself from getting hurt by a boy who meant so much to her. “I just want drinks.” And drinks Addison did get.

5 shots and two beers in two hours at the first bar took her to a state she rarely reached, very drunk. Seeing Matthew on tv had done it for her, he was living his life to the best so she was going to do the exact same, even if she was working 9-5, 5 days a week. Simone knew better than to let Addison go anywhere alone and made sure that she had drunk water and got home safely. However, Simone didn’t expect to wake up only an hour after falling asleep to hear Addison talking to someone on the phone.

“BRAAADDDYYYYYYYY!!!!” Addison shouted down the phone with a giggle.

“Heya Addie,” Brady replied, trying to control himself and not laugh too much but it was too hard. Here, well in Edmonton, in front of him was the exact opposite of the girl he had grown up with. Normally Addison was well kept and smartly dressed, today he saw her in a massive Blues t-shirt and hair forming a birds nest. “Has someone been drinking?” he asked playfully.

“Yeaaaaaaaaaa, I saw Matty on tv and decided I didn’t want him being the only one having fun tonight,” she said, trying not to hiccup. The alcohol she had consumed had kicked in suddenly and she had no idea what to do. As Brady was the most recent person she had texted, somehow she had called him.

“You saw a flames game in Edmonton? They must really hate their own team eh?” He laughed.

“I did! I think it’s because they’re coming for a game here next week, ooohhhh, maybe I’ll see Matty, I miss Matty, I was silly,” Addison explained, even if the drinks had gone to her head, she was trying to form coherent sentences.

“Hey, Addie, I know Matt misses you too. But, the best thing you can do is head to bed and get some sleep. It’s gotta be like 5am in Alberta, so go to bed, yeah?” Brady was really trying to help the girl, no matter what happened between Addison and Matthew, Brady didn’t want to lose the potential of a friendship with her again.

“Okaay Brady,” Addison yawned, “I’ve made it to bed, it’s sooooo soft, like Matty’s hair.” Addison couldn’t help but smile as she thought back to the time they had kissed, it was one of the happiest moments of her life along with graduating college.

“I’ll text you when you wake up,” Brady said, “now sleep Addie.” She had fallen asleep before he had even finished speaking and the sound of her softly breathing was the only thing that either Brady or Simone could hear.

prev//next

#ahockeywrites #the girl next door #Matthew Tkachuk #flames19 #nhl imagine #hockey imagine

[tranquiltatsumi]

God okay since the canon dorm assignments are fucking insane and honestly look like someone threw darts at a chart to decide where people would be, let's talk about the potential unit dorms- which actually Make Sense- have. I spent a lot of time thinking ab this earlier so here's some hcs:

(Note: Some of these are shippy! Includes Kurokei, Adosou, Kaorei and Ritsumao! Just thought I'd prewarn yall)

Subaru wakes the rest of trickstar up at like 5am every day bc he has too much energy and makes too much noise. Hokke throws everything in reach, including his alarm clock, in an attempt to make him shut up

When was the last time Mao actually slept in his bed? Nobody knows. They have a "you work too hard" intervention pretty much monthly

Kuro and Keito share bunks despite the fact that this almost always ends with Keito on the floor bc Kuro moves too much in his sleep

they always make sure Souma is getting enough rest. very hypocritical of Keito to lecture him about the values of sleep when he didn't come back to the dorm until 3am and there's 12 empty red bull cans in the bin that was emptied last night.

Natsume puts small, mostly harmless curses on tsumugi while he sleeps. things like making it so his shoelaces will always come untied. Mugi considers them friendly pranks (and fair game considering his war crimes)

on the flip side he uses his magic to make things good for Sora. if he had a bad day Natsume will stay up just a little later to make a spell that gives him the happiest dream he ever had. Sora doesn't know he does this.

Ra*bits have movie nights every friday n they have a movie picking rota so that everyone gets a fair shot. they build a blanket fortress to sit in while they watch the movie

Ra*bits cuddle puddle is a common occurrence. they just fall asleep in a pile. Ra*bits 100% most wholesome family

Hajime makes everyone tea every morning without fail, and he's learned what kinds of tea they like and saves to buy a few boxes of each. When Eichi finds this out he starts gifting hajime very specific boxes of tea. tea club gotta stick together

Kaoru is forced to confront his gay thoughts because Rei is too goddamn pretty even in the mornings and he can't ignore it anymore.

Eventually it becomes a common occurrence for Adonis or Koga to wake up and see Rei in Kaoru's bunk (they don't both fit in the coffin. Rei is unimpressed by this)

Adonis spends more time in Akatsuki's dorm than Undead's and Rei is developing concerned dad syndrome- he doesn't know why Adonis is "avoiding" them (don't tell him he's dating Souma he's gonna be so dramatic ab it)

Mao still has to wake Ritsu up every day bc even tho the other members of Knights are there to do it, Ritsu refuses to listen to them.

Izumi has literally sat on him before ad Ritsu went right back to sleep until Mao arrived.

when Mao knocks on the door someone always goes "Hey Ritsu your boyfriends here" and before the two of them actually start dating poor Ritsu gets so embarrassed he refuses to get up even for Mao, because he's bright red and doesn't need Mao seeing him like that.

with both Izumi and Arashi living there, the bathroom has So Much makeup in it. Too much makeup. Most of it is Arashi's considering Izumi spends most of his time in Italy. She has the longest morning routine you will ever see. How is she not always late to class.

One time Leo used eyeliner to write music on the mirror because inspiration struck while he was brushing his teeth. Nobody was particularly thrilled with him for that.

all of Ryuseitai notices Midori's depression like a month after they move into the dorm. cue very concerned chat ab how they can help him and whether he's getting professional help

all of them have forcibly carried him to bed and watched until he fell asleep because he stayed up till 2am to finish work

Kanata fills up the bath and floats in it when he's sad. They have to keep an eye out bc he falls asleep in there sometimes.

Shu still spends most of his time in Paris but he comes back often enough, and similarly to Keito he's a bit of a hypocrite about making sure Mika sleeps enough

Eichi is terrible for drinking too much tea in the evening and not being able to sleep despite being exhausted. Wataru and Yuzuru have taken to offering to make the tea for him and giving him decaf. He knows but he appreciates the gesture so he never says anything.

The fine dorm is often covered in rose petals. If Tori finds one more rose petal under his pillow he's gonna throw Wataru out the window. It doesn't matter that Wataru is like a foot taller than him.

#subaru akehoshi #hokuto hidaka #mao isara #trickstar #kuro kiryu #keito hasumi #souma kanzaki #akatsuki #natsume sakasaki #tsumugi aoba #sora harukawa #switch #hajime shino #ra*bits #kaoru hakaze #rei sakuma #adonis otogari #undead #ritsu sakuma #izumi sena #arashi narukami #leo tsukinaga #knights #midori takamine #kanata shinkai #ryuseitai #wataru hibiki #eichi tenshouin #tori himemiya #valkyrie

[mcrmadness]

Oh look, an anxiety attack, hadn't had one in a while... yay

It's the health anxiety again. I random, small itchy spot just popped up to my wrist out of nowhere and now I cannot go to shower and I don't know if I dare to go to sleep even. It's almost 5:30am and I have a meeting tomorrow (today) after 1pm.

I'm still in the middle of a panic attack, I'm terrified of allergy despite not being allergic to anything. I get these skin things sometimes but usually never due to anything specific. In fact I suspect that it's just my skin being very sensitive and reacting easily to things like a hair or fur or even a corner of a piece of paper pressing against my skin for a little too long. Sometimes I get these on my neck when my necklace is touching my skin a certain way (e.g. when I'm trying to sleep and don't realize the pointy part is against my skin), sometimes I get these just from my clothes and I try to think it's probably a cat fur or my own hair that's just in a position that it is sticking against my skin.

It's just. Right now I am in the alert mode. All my body hair is sticking up and I can feel my blood circulating all around in my skin, ready to fight or flee. I'm just checking out every single sensation I get in case it's not just one spot but more would appear. My skin feels itchy from everywhere. I am so, so exhausted but I am too afraid to go to sleep until I calm down enough.

Some days, life with an anxiety disorder is so exhausting. It's moments like these that feel like a reality check. Feeling like I was doing just fine and having my anxiety under control, and then there is one second like this and I feel like I'm a fool for even thinking about my future because I have anxiety. One second like this can trigger a panic attack and depending on the time of the day (usually they happen at nights because everyone's asleep and I wouldn't want to bother e.g. my parents at 5am), it can just. Mess up with everything. Cause me to fuck up my sleeping schedule because I am too afraid to sleep, so then I sleep only like 2 hours or none at all, or if I have no plans, then I'll go to sleep when I have calmed down enough and it can be anything from 6am to 1pm.

Moments like these always reminds me of how I can't have a job. I mean, what is even worse than having these panic attacks? To not be able to sleep because you are too afraid to sleep no matter how exhausted you would be, and then still having to get up in time to go to work and be there, totally exhausted, as that will also create even more anxiety because of how overwhelming everything feels when you haven't slept enough. Anxiety attacks also drain so much energy that all you want to do afterwards is sleep. Skip any plans and just sleep and rest. It's another reason why I am afraid of having to start a "real job" one day because I don't know if I can manage that. I might be doing alright most of the time and then I have just one random physical sensation and my whole world falls apart because I think I'm dying and wanna know what caused that sensation but am too afraid to try again in case it's something dangerous.

Tomorrow the meeting is with the occupational therapist. For the past few meetings we have been talking about studying and working and browsing all kinds of schools and study opportunities and have been trying to figure out what would interest and also suit me. I also mentioned that I have been thinking about if there would be anything in Germany next year that I could do for like 2-3 months before the summer so I wouldn't have to wonder where to live during that 2-3 weeks between the concerts. Maybe this panic attack is partially of that too. I just feel so exhausted because the autumn and seasonal depression (seasonal affective disorder) is approaching, I would not be on the mood for any shit like that tomorrow but I know the time will run out soon and it'd be easier to do that now than in e.g. February. Plan stuff, I mean. I don't need to do anything yet, just go through options and plan things. But you know, I just would not have that energy now.

I've been having derealization and depersonalization moments lately too. Mainly because I have been wondering my future and every time I do that, I just am hit with the reality and start to dissociate. Because it's just... so difficult to understand how big the world is. How there are other countries outside of mine. How things are happening. My small die ärzte bubble at home is so safe. Everything outside that bubble is scary. I am afraid of mental breakdowns. What would I do if I was all alone in a new country and had a mental breakdown? I could not call my mom if I can go to their place at night. There would be a few thousands of kilometers too many between the places.

I have friends in Germany, but I still don't know what would I do or where would I go. Berlin has been a dream for over 10 years but I keep being told it's impossible to find a flat from there. I don't think any of my friends live in Berlin, either. Nor that close to Berlin. So I would be all alone in a city where I don't even have friends. And all my German friends live all around the country and I just... don't think there is any point in choosing a city just because a friend lives in the city. There is no point running after friends who also have other plans and goals. I very likely would just be left alone in their town, too, if I did that and they found a future from somewhere else and moved on.

It's just. I don't know. The loneliness is awful and one of the biggest reasons for why I have been thinking about Germany is that I might find more like-minded people from there, and of course to be closer to where everything dä is happening as I could even walk to a store and find and buy an album or maybe a poster, or just a magazine with interviews. Something that never happens in my city nor even country. Still I just always have this feeling like I would have doomed to be "forever alone" - me being aroace and not looking for any kind of (romantic) partnership doesn't help much either, just creates even bigger gap between me and those who are looking for a partner and eventually will find one. I dream that I would be less lonely in Germany and that it would be the solution to all of my problems, but at the same time I'm afraid that I would be as lonely there as I am here. I guess it's partially also my own fault because I never go anywhere, but in Finland I can't much because people are so introverted that every social interaction often happens when people are surrounded by alcohol and I don't drink alcohol. Already in junior high I felt that I had no social life because everyone else's social life was revolving around alcohol and I had no desire to take a part to any of that.

Well, at least I now feel a little better after venting. Not having that much anxiety anymore, but still being a bit confused as always. Feeling like wasting my time and being too old for anything. I need friends of my age but I still feel like I was 18 and see younger people and think they are friend material and then realize they're literally 10 years younger and we do think differently. I have seen it so many times, but I just constantly forget that people in their early 20s are still so young that we're basically from different worlds at this point.

I'll continue watching youtube videos. A little bit of escapism before I decide if I am brave enough to either shower or sleep. 5-6 hours until I have to wake up.

#mcrmadness' deep thoughts #anxiety #loneliness

[sugarless--girl]

Dinner and Breakfast

Kakashi's a vampire, Iruka's his blood bank. It's simple as that. Or it should've been just that.

Written for Umino Hours Discord Exchange hosted by @magnustesla​. I scrambled to write everything super fast so I hope it all makes sense. Ngl, I didn't know where the hell I was going with this until I was more than halfway done. Hopefully that doesn't show LOL

The initial idea was that Iruka had a sanctuary that helped a lot of different supernatural beings. It would be in a modern setting but Iruka would act as a intermediary of sorts for the mythical world and normal world. Naruto would be a kitsune, Kotetsu and Izumo would be tengu, Asuma a fire elemental, etc. Anko and Genma made in here briefly but I didn't get much of a chance to expand on them. I like what this idea turned out to be but maybe someday I'll expand it a bit further. Who knows?

Anyway, comments are most welcome! Hope you enjoy this @seekingsquake!

Read on Ao3

Iruka was brought back to wakefulness as he felt a body enter the covers on his bed. He was entirely cognizant as he felt the dip near him but he was almost jolted awake as an ice cold nose pressed against his neck.

“Kakashi!” He hissed as he pushed himself up. Iruka’s eyes could make out the silver hair that stood out in the dark.

“Ah, did I wake you up? Sorry about that.” Kakashi said, sounding far too amused to actually mean his apology.

Iruka just glared, trying to blink the sleepiness out of his eyes. He glanced at his bedside and found that the clock read a little past 5AM. Dammit, Kakashi always came too early. “I told you to go wait in your room, last time.” Iruka said, unbuttoning the collar of his pajamas,

“Mah sensei, I couldn’t wait to see you again.” His voice was too casual but there was deliberateness to it—as if he was barely holding back. Iruka, now that he was more awake, was able to see that Kakashi’s eyes had a gleam of predatory hunger to them. He always waited until the last moment, didn’t he?

“Don’t flatter me.” Iruka said, pushing aside his long brown hair to bare his neck. “Just hurry up. And please try to not bite so obviously. The kids kept asking questions, last time.”

“I’ll try to be more careful.” He said with a helpless shrug and moved to pull Iruka close. The younger man came into his arms easily, into a position made more for lovers than two in a mutually beneficial relationship. As always, Kakashi’s body was cold. He looked uncomfortable for a split-second before his blood-lust took over and sunk his teeth into Iruka’s neck.

It hurt as per usual—this was nothing new. But Iruka was getting better at concealing his reactions. Kakashi always seemed uncomfortable with their arrangement no matter how much Iruka assured him, it was fine. The silver-haired man didn’t show it all that much, but it seemed as though his indifferent attitude that was clearly a put-upon mask, would fall away at Iruka’s discomfort. It was odd having the other vampire hover over him, truthfully. Really, Iruka didn’t mind. Kakashi was careful with the amount he drank. He never left Iruka exhausted in the same way others did in the past.

Kakashi pulled back after a few moments, his eyes dark. He stared at the brunette and Iruka held back a shiver. There was a want in them that only existed for a split second before it disappeared. Iruka blinked, feeling sleepy once more as exhaustion overtook him. He went to find some wrappings for the puncture wounds, not risking bleeding over his covers. Why did Kakashi always insist on coming right when he was asleep?

“So,” The vampire said, watching Iruka fix himself and re-button his shirt. “Breakfast in bed?”

“That’s your end of the deal, isn’t it?” Iruka said, a sly smile on his lips. Kakashi shot back his own sheepish smile—as per usual, he was always strangely bashful after his feeding. Maybe it had to do with the fact that it was such an intimate position.

“Yeah, I’ll go make it. Uh, thanks.” And with that, the vampire pulled up his mask and left the room. Iruka dropped back to his pillow and closed his eyes. He could get an hour or two of rest before he had to properly get up.

***

Sometimes Iruka dreamed of Mizuki. He woke up with a start those nights, often shaking and covered in sweat. He was slowly forgetting the color of his eyes but it still stood out to him every now and then. Was forgetting really the answer?

Kakashi had habit of sleeping in Iruka’s bed during the day. The brunette didn’t mind—he knew that the other man couldn’t go out anyway due to the sunlight. Really, it was a bit adorable but Iruka never said his thoughts aloud. He wasn’t sure why he kept such things to himself.

***

Iruka woke up to the smell of pancakes. Kakashi kept stopping by to cook for him even when the other man didn’t get any blood for it. It was a relatively new development that Iruka couldn’t help but feel strangely guilty over.

He also couldn’t help but wonder what Kakashi was thinking. Was he planning for something? Buttering him up for a favor?

When Iruka brought it up at the dining table, the vampire just laughed and said, “can’t I just do something nice for my favorite human?”

***

Sometimes Iruka waited outside for Kakashi. He’d do this most often when the sky was it’s clearest. It was never particularly clear as the light pollution from the city lights obscured the stars—nothing like home. But he wasn’t looking for the stars as much as the absence of light.

The absence of light in the form of a bat. It wasn’t easy to spot and oftentimes, Iruka didn’t see anything. However, it seemed as though Kakashi came like clockwork these days. Long gone was the ‘always late’ Kakashi Hatake. Or at least, he was on time when he was visiting Iruka. Now, wasn’t that something?

***

One time Iruka woke up from a dream about Mizuki and Kakashi was beside him. He handed the shaking brunette a glass of water. Soon the words came spilling out as easily as the few stray tears did. Kakashi didn’t say anything but instead listened. His smooth face never strayed from Iruka as his hands rubbed comforting circles on the other’s back.

***

“So…are you guys sleeping together or what?” Iruka choked on his water. Anko kept smiling.

“Platonically, yes. Romantically no.” Iruka knew that dodging the topic would be worse. Anko was relentless.

“What about carnally?”

Anko was always a bit too interested in Iruka’s sex life. She claimed that it was a because she was a succubus but Iruka knew better—it was because she was a relentless gossip hound. Truly a terrible habit.

“He’s just seeking me out for warmth.” That was the shittiest lie that Iruka came up with. And he was a pretty good liar (despite popular belief.) He scowled, knowing that Anko wasn’t buying it.

She really wasn’t. “I just wanna know what’s been going on between you two!” Her voice was bordering on whiny. It was cute but Iruka wasn’t about to tell here how endearing he found her.

Instead he just rolled his eyes and acquiesced a bit of information to satisfy her. “Honestly, I have no clue what’s going on between us. It’s not like we’ve even kissed or anything. I just give him my blood and he cooks me breakfast.”

Anko hummed. Iruka was afraid she was going to push it. “You know, I heard that sex with a vampire while they suck your blood feels really good.”

“I’ll….keep that in mind….” Even though he was used to the raunchy topics Anko brought up, Iruka couldn’t help the heat that crept up his ears. “Thank you for that.”

“Your welcome! And don’t forget to wrap it before you tap it!”

***

Sometimes Iruka wondered what Kakashi and him would look like. He considered and let his considering be shown through his actions. The vampire was left flustered by his actions.

But then Mizuki stopped by. And once again, Iruka was reminded of the particular shade of his green eyes.

***

The next time Kakashi came, Iruka was grading tests that his students had done. Grading an elementary school student’s journal was always a fun experience seeing as they had ridiculous stories to tell. They obviously didn’t see it as anything but normal but the way the student fixated on certain topics was just too adorable and entertaining.

Kakashi crept in through the window and froze as Iruka fixed him with a glare. Even though it had been a month since he last saw him, Iruka still was able to pick up where they left off. (Kakashi had to leave for some important business—or at least, that’s how phrased it said it. Iruka simply hugged him and left him at that. The vampire looked strangely let down.)

“I told you to knock on my door!”

“Well you see, your next door neighbors dog knows I’m a vampire and I don’t want that dog to relay that information to his owner so—”

“Alright, stop.” Iruka said, pinching his nose. “Take off your shoes already—I don’t want you tracking dirt in my house.”

“Really, sensei? You think I’d do such a thing?” Kakashi asked, eyes warm. It was obvious that he was smiling, even with his mask on. “You have no faith in me!”

It was true that Kakashi’s shoes were relatively clean. But they were relative to Naruto’s shoes, who was the only other person who insisted on climbing through the windows. “You’re such a bad influence. Soon, everyone that comes through my door, is gonna assume that my window is fair game.”

“Mah, mah, I’ll try to not come when anyone’s here.” Kakashi said with chuckle. “I never do, anyway.”

Iruka rolled his eyes. “Guess again. Genma’s here.”

The warmth from Kakashi’s eyes dropped and Iruka was left blinking in surprise. “Genma?”

“I needed him to look over a few wards. They were fine until—” Iruka pursed his lips. He forgot Kakashi didn’t know this story.

“Until?” He appeared to pick up that something had gone wrong. “What happened, Iruka?”

It was always odd to hear Kakashi call him by his name. Especially since he so frequently preferred to use Iruka’s title, ‘Sensei.’

“Mizuki stopped by and well, Naruto and Anko were around so not much came of it.” He didn’t get too hurt this time at least. It was embarrassing to be protected by Naruto—someone Iruka vowed to protect himself—but at least the situation didn’t get out of control. Anko diffused the situation before anything worse happened. “I just needed someone to look over my wards a bit more thoroughly. He’s in the bedroom.”

Kakashi stood still. Iruka couldn’t read him.

“Where is he now?”

“Asuma took care of it.” His shrug was forcibly casual. Iruka was mostly over the incident but still. “Anko and Asuma both managed to handle it pretty well.”

He was thankful for that. He didn’t want Naruto to be the one to protect him—not when it should’ve been the other way around.

Kakashi crossed the room in a few strides and tilted Iruka’s chin as if to see the truth for himself. But this time he was fine. Or fine as he could be with his shitty ex trying to break into his house. “I’m fine, Kakashi. Really.”

The silver-haired man didn’t seem entirely willing to accept it but he nodded all the same. “Alright, but just let me know if you need anything.” The sincerity coming from him was jarring.

Iruka couldn’t help but tease him a little. “What, not about to ask for anything in return? I thought you came here for blood?” It was a bit of a cruel joke—he knew that Kakashi didn’t just want that. But Iruka still said it anyway, the tease a bit more of test now.

“I don’t—” Kakashi scratched the back of his neck. “Mah sensei, your opinion of me is too low.”

The implicit ‘I care about you’ hung in the air and Iruka couldn’t quite….grasp it. Not yet. It was too soon. The pain from seeing Mizuki again was still hovering in the back of his mind as Iruka worked. He had mostly gotten it to settle down with the tedium of work but that didn’t mean he was ready for any deeper conversations. Not just yet.

“Either way, the situation’s been dealt with. Do you want to check the wards, yourself?”

“What, don’t trust my work?” Genma, a mage working under the witch Tsunade, came striding out of the only other room in his apartment. “What are you telling Kakashi, Iruka? Seriously, we had our favorite teach protected this time around.”

Iruka bristled at the idea that he even needed to be protected but Kakashi relaxed a bit more. “That’s good to here—I know this Sensei is the type to never say if he really does need help.”

“I just said you could check the wards. Isn’t that accepting help?” Iruka pointed out.

“That’s different.” Genma scoffed.

Iruka was ready to go at the mage before Kakashi interrupted with, “is Naruto alright?”

Iruka bit back a smile.

“He was fine as ever.” Genma said, adjusting his bandanna, “He wanted to fight Mizuki himself but Asuma held him back.”

“Good.” Kakashi nodded and Genma made his way out of the house—presumably to check the magical wards there.

It was the two of them once more. “I’m sorry I wasn’t around.” Kakashi said, quietly.

“It’s not something either of us could’ve predicted.” Iruka said with a shake of his head. He couldn’t lie—Kakashi brought him a sense of security that no one else brought—but it wasn’t all that bad this time. Truly.

“Still—”

“Seriously, Kakashi. It’s not a big deal. Now, are you too tired to make dinner or should I order take-out?”

“Is Genma eating with us?” Kakashi asked, making his way to the small, but neatly kept kitchenette.

“I’ll ask.” Iruka said making his way to his door. He paused and looked at Kakashi. “It’s nice to have you back again.”

Kakashi’s eyes curved into a smile. I feel safer with you here. The unspoken words hung in the air. It didn’t need to be said.

#naruto #iruka umino #kakashi hatake #kakashi x iruka #kakairu #umino hours exchange #umino hours discord #90 minutes to gift #I'm so tired I hope this turned out okay #vampire Kakashi seems pretty popular huh....

[tirednotflirting]

couch cuddles - l.h.

school is kicking my ass and I miss my friends like mad so yes, I projected all of that here at around 2am after yelling about this sweet pic of Luke with @castaway-cashton​. 

hope everyone is finding ways to manage all of the time indoors these days. I’ve been thankful for the community on here during all of this. much love and happy reading (and pls send me thoughts, I’m still new to this and horrible at editing).

wc: ~1.6k

They were nearing the end of their third week in quarantine. Three weeks of being locked up inside (aside from a brief gloved trip to the grocery at the beginning of week two). 21 days of zoom meetings with her graduate advisor and radio interviews on facetime, of creative pasta dishes (the one thing had randomly stocked up on even before this all happened), of afternoons in the backyard watching Petunia run in circles until she stopped in front of their chairs, her sad eyes practically begging to be taken to a dog park that was unfortunately closed until this was all over.

They had settled into a routine pretty quickly. She wouldn’t start her work before 9 and unless he had some international interview he had to take part in, Luke would do the same. She would plug in her laptop and stick her phone on do not disturb at 6pm sharp. Luke would keep his stuck in the deep pockets of his sweats, always eager for a sporadic facetime from a tipsy Calum asking to let the dogs say hello or Ash calling for him to listen to a new melody he had thought up or Mike sending him another twitter meme. They switched back and forth on who made dinner, Luke had been enjoying trying things from the beginner’s cookbooks his mom had sent him sometime during the last year. They watched a lot of movies. She read a lot of books, he spent a good deal of time playing around with different songs they had been trying in the studio during February. With everything going on, she figured there were worse ways she could be living than doing what she could for her research and TAing from the comfort of her sweet boy’s kitchen table.

She had started to pick up on his cabin fever when their day began at around 5am with Luke shifting around in the bed so much it almost felt like he was doing something choreographed. After 15 minutes of his dance, she sat up on her elbow and reached for her phone to check the time. She didn’t remember exactly what the bright digits displayed across a picture of Luke and Petunia with flowers tucked behind their ears she had snapped a couple months prior were other than too early.

‘Honey, are you feeling alright?’ she asked quietly, her throat dry from sleep, as she leaned back from the bedside table. Her hand moved back to cross his chest as his own wrapped around her waist.

‘Yeah, just can’t get comfy,’ he huffed, obviously frustrated by the random early morning energy. ‘Gonna go let Miss P out for a minute. Go back to sleep, angel, you need your rest.’

While she wanted to further investigate what was up with her tired eyed boy, she immediately felt herself yawning. She lifted her head from his chest and pressed her lips to his jaw before letting her head fall back to the pillows as she felt his weight lift from the mattress.

When she woke up next, it was to the sound of her alarm and an empty bed. She padded out to the kitchen and was greeted with a kiss to the top of her cheek and her coffee. (‘I think I got the sugar to cream ratio right this time but please give me feedback, lovie.’) She shrugged off the morning, brushing off his odd early jitters with the fact that they had both been getting a lot more sleep than normal given the new situation.  

She had been busy throughout the day. It was a Thursday, her busy day, even with the quarantine. In the morning, she zoom called her advisor to check in with her more personally but also to update her on where she had gotten that week with the data she had been sifting through (being stuck outside of the lab made for good reason to finally do some data work). She did a meeting after lunch for the undergrad course she was TAing this semester. Though that discussion section had basically turned into everyone just talking about their pets and families more than talking about evolutionary theory (they needed to see faces though so she didn’t mind the chatter). She held virtual office hours after that for a couple hours (more chattering with a little bit of explaining how that equilibrium equation worked again).

So by the time her 6pm switch to do not disturb rolled around, she was more than looking forward to spending a few hours on the couch with a glass of wine and the new book she had ordered that arrived that morning.

She’d been settled on the couch for about 15 minutes and was raising a stemless glass of pinot grigio to her lips, when she looked through the big window in the living room that gave a nice view of the yard only to see Petunia wandering around but no sign of her golden boy. She looked to check what page she’d reached, mentally marking her place before getting up to look for where Luke had wandered off to, when she heard socked feet shuffling into the living room behind her. She turned her head to find the sweet face she hadn’t seen hardly at all since she was handed her morning coffee so many hours earlier. His normally bright eyes looked worried and his dimples hidden by a pouted frown.

‘Sweet pea, what’s the matter?’ she questioned, the hand not holding her novel reaching for his once he’d wandered close enough to where she sat on the couch, her left leg still folded up while her right rested against the floor, ready to get up to hug the droopy boy. She doesn’t get a chance to though as he moved to sit beside her, his fingers playing with hers almost nervously.

‘Miss the guys,’ came a quiet voice that sounded like it was coming from a tight throat. ‘And like, we’re so lucky here. And the album is doing well and the fans have pushed so much on this release. And we’re healthy and everyone we love is healthy but,’ he blinked really hard before continuing, ‘I just wanna see them. Like actually see them.’

She leaned forward to leave her book on the coffee table before moving her hand to rub at the back of his neck, her fingers working through the knots in his curls there, trying to get him to release some of the tension in his shoulders. ‘And I love being here with you and we would never normally get this much time together during an album release and I know I shouldn’t be whining and-‘

He stopped short when she pulled her hand from his and placed it against his cheek to turn his face towards her. ‘Babe, you don’t have to apologize for feeling right now,’ her thumb stroked against the top of his normally rosy cheek. ‘You’re allowed to be upset and you’re allowed to miss your boys. You’re never gone from them for this long, it makes sense.’

He opened his mouth to respond but then just nuzzled against her palm when she shushed him. ‘And I love being here with you too but that doesn’t mean I’m not bummed that my sister canceled her trip out here and that I don’t miss seeing my students every week.’

Across the room, the clatter of Petunia’s paws against the tile in the kitchen sounded out as she trotted towards the couch. Luke sniffled a little bit, and the girl he’s practically sitting on top of felt a tear against the thumb still running across his cheekbone. Petunia must have sensed the sadness coming from the couch as she jumped up and pushed herself against Luke’s legs, looking up at him for pets.

Luke blinked back tears again, his head leaning back to face the ceiling and the hand at the back of his neck moved to scratch between his shoulders. ‘I know it can’t make it go away but how about cuddles for a bit and then we can facetime everyone after dinner? See what they’re up to maybe?’ she whispered, suddenly aware of the stillness of the room.

His lips pouted a bit as he nodded and turned to her. ‘Can I lay in your lap so Petunia can get cuddles too?’

She let herself giggle softly at his request, not being able to help herself as she leaned forward to brush her lips against his pout. ‘Of course, sweet pea.’

He maneuvered his long limbs so Petunia was tucked against him (easiest access for tummy rubs) and laid his sleepy head in his girl’s lap. As one hand returned to the glass of wine beside her, the other combed through the bleached curls, softer than usual from the hair mask she convinced him to do with her earlier in the week. Though her heart ached that she couldn’t give any better of a solution to the way her sweet boy was feeling, she knew something was right by the way he quickly fell asleep, his lips pouted against her leg as he rested. She returned the glass to the side table and carefully picked up her book again, moving slowly so she didn’t disturb the sleeping boy in her lap. However, one hand did stay tucked into his hair as even in his sleep he would start fidgeting some if he couldn’t feel the lazy patterns she drew through the curls.

Later that night, as she finished rinsing their wine glasses from a late dinner, she heard his loud, bright laughter followed by ‘Baby, you gotta come see the costumes Mike and Cal got for the dogs! And bring your laptop, we need to find a pink Power Ranger costume for Petunia!’

She chuckled as she set the last glass down on the drying rack. Yeah, they were gonna be alright.

//

#luke hemmings #luke hemmings fanfic #luke hemmings fic #luke hemmings blurb #luke hemmings blurbs #luke fic #5sos #5sos fanfic #5sos fic #5sos blurb #5sos blurbs #yes i did accidentally delete this when i was attempting to change the title and now here we are #i need a nap #srry if this is the second time you're seeing this im just dumb

[adangerousbond]

Blood, Family or Both

Chapter one. Post S1 finale Prodigal Son two-shot. 

Started writing this back when it first aired, but got sidetracked. What actually is it? No idea! No much of an actual plot, I just love this show a lot and was missing it so decided to finish this. Have started the next/last chapter, but honestly, probably will take a bit to finish it. Unedited as usual. Still figuring out these characters, they're so complex and tricky, but so great! Enjoy!

Read below, at ff.net or AO3

He had failed, failed his sister in a way that he couldn't fully grasp yet, he had been running over everything, more than just the events from that night; their childhood, family dinners, events, anything that he might have gotten some sort of hint of what she was capable of it. There was a moment, a small moment, before Dani and JT had knocked – having come due to his earlier text -, that he was debating on taking the blame or hiding the body.

The next few hours had been filled off questions and police tape once again going up around his family home, the constant string of something to do had been working to distract him from his questions, from his newest issues. That was until he had hitched a ride into the station, unable to follow his sister into her holding, and unable to make himself leave; there the silence gave him the opportunity to start the new line of blame and hatred that was filling him.

The small tap on the glass door as she entered, did nothing to draw his attention, her presence wasn't any form of threat to him, not that he was sure that his body would even register a threat anymore, and her compassion was the last thing he deserved. He made no move to break the silence, no move to reach out to the person he had pushed away numerous times already, only to pull her back, and for some reason she kept coming back.

"Come on, I'll take you home," Dani spoke quietly, a slight nod as he stood being the only response she got.

Making her way back towards the bullpen, she turned her head back slightly to ensure he was following, he caught her eye for a moment, looking away ashamedly as he saw the concern in them. Glancing towards the room that held his sister, he could see his mother's lawyers in with her, trying as best as possible to understand, to make sense of the night, and attempt to come up with their game plan; insanity would be his guess.

---------------

By the time they got back to his loft, the voices in his head hadn't quietened any, he wasn't any closer to getting the answers that he was after and a part of him wondered if he ever would, he was still trying to answer similar questions about his father after all. He hadn't spoken the whole car ride, and she hadn't pried, hadn't pushed for anything, because she knew him better, she knew he wasn't ready to talk, but she also knew that he shouldn't be alone, and for that, for her, he was grateful.

"How, how did I miss it?" he asked himself more than he asked her, voicing the question that had been eating at him since the moment it happened, how did he miss that his little sister was capable of that, capable of something he had proven that he wasn't even able of, and he was the one with he list of issues a mile long; he was the one their father had groomed.

Her eyes snapped to him, she wanted to tell him that it wasn't his fault, that he wasn't responsible for the actions of others, but instead she sunk down onto the bed next to him. Sitting for a moment before wrapping her arm around his shoulders, she let him fall into her, knowing better than to give him any response, knowing nothing that she could say right now would help.

He had well and truly been running past empty, so it didn't surprise her in the slightest as his breathing evened out and his body relaxed as sleep overtook it. Gently, she lowered them side wards back onto the bed, she knew that she should leave or at the very least wait him out on the couch, but there was something about the way he was curled into her side, something about the way he finally seemed at peace, at ease, or as much as she felt he would possibly be able to at the moment, that made her stay.

---------------

The thrashing woke her before she heard the ringing, it took her a second to realise exactly what was going on and where she was, but when she remembered, action took over her sleep state and she moved to wake him, a hand moving to stop the phone as she did.

"Hey, hey, it's okay, it's just my phone alarm," she explained, her hands reaching to his shoulders to still him, focus him.

"Dani?" Malcolm asked as the haze faded, his eyes catching her with confusion replacing the fear.

"Sorry, must have fallen asleep," she brushed off his gaze with an apologetic smile, quickly moving to get up off his bed, her lack of comment to his nightmare not going unnoticed by him.

"Why does your alarm go off so early?" he chuckled, glancing at the time on his phone and realising it was only 5am, which also meant that even with the late hour that they had gotten back to, he had actually managed to get a couple hours sleep.

"I like to have the chance to get some things done before work," she reasoned, heading to his kitchen to make them some coffee, knowing neither was about to be able to get back to sleep.

"What could you possibly have to do at this time?" Malcolm stuck with the small talk, skipping over her being there and ignoring everything that had gone down the day before.

"Go for a run," she shrugged, leaning against his counter tiredly, the last few days had been a lot on them all, and it wasn't about to ease up anytime soon.

"We should go to the hospital, check on Gil, and…" he paused, accepting the coffee off her as he didn't want to think about what else he needed to do.

"And check on your mother," she finished for him, nodding in agreement on his plan.

---------------

Trailing behind as they entered Gil's room, Malcolm couldn't help but feel dread, Gil's eyes flew to them both, his mothers landed on his with a sense of relief. Relief that he knew he would quickly ruin, just like he seemed to ruin everything, he just hoped at least some one had given them the run down on what had happened, but from what he could grasp so far, he didn't hold much hopes on that.

"Malcolm, dear," Jessica near cried, jumping up to hug her son, accepting the coffee from his companion with a small smile as she stepped back.

"How are you feeling?" Dani directed toward Gil; her eyes full of concern as she took in his condition.

"Like getting stabbed is the least of my problems right now," Gil spoke in his levelled tone that he had managed to perfect after all these years of dealing with this family.

"What happened? We've only gotten the abridged version, well, that and the news' version, but surely, surely…" Jessica trailed off, the look on her son's face giving away more than she wanted.

"How bad is it?" Gill asked, his training getting his answer from their body language before he got his verbal one.

"Pretty bad," Dani spoke up after sharing a look with Malcolm.

"I have all our lawyers working on it, they'll sort it out," Jessica once again saw something on her son's face. "Right?"

"Mother..." Malcolm started, his sentence ending before it really started once he realised that he didn't know how to continue.

"God, all this time I was so worried about what he did to you, how did I miss this?" Jessica reiterated the thoughts running through her son's mind.

"We all did," Gil agreed, his eyes trained on the profiler, trying to determine just how worried he needed to be about the man he considered a son, "are you holding up okay kid?"

"Yeah," Malcolm answered haphazardly, watching his mother read something on her phone, "what is it mother?"

"The lawyers, they are wanting to go over some things with us, they're still at the station with Ainsley," she told him, shaking her head over the fact she always seemed to be having to deal with murders and lawyers.

"I can give you a ride," Dani offered, gaining a thanks in response.

"Dani, a moment," Gil instructed as the group made their way to leave, waiting until she was the only one left in the room to continue, "thank-you, for looking out for him."

"Of course," she responded as if it was something that didn't need to even be mentioned, gaining a smile off her mentor.

---------------

The silence in the precinct made Dani check the time, she had gotten lost in the files and hadn't realised how late it had gotten. Glancing around she laid eyes on him, unsurprised that he had still been there, he had been with his mother and their lawyers for hours and then stuck around, trying to be of assistance to them, and trying to work out his own answers.

"Let's get out of here," she instructed, knowing he would follow without complaint.

They entered his apartment as quietly as the night before, the extra twenty-four hours had not done anything to gain him any more understanding, or any less guilt, if anything it had just brought him more questions, more guilt. Sitting in the room across from his sister, watching her confusion and apparent lack of any memories had made him wonder if it was the truth or an act, and then he had felt worse for even questioning if she would be lying, which had made him realise it was that thinking that made it hard for him to have seen what she was capable of, and so, he was just going around in circles in his head.

"I'm going to stay, okay?" Dani broke the silence, broke the endless loop running through his mind, he had told her once it was like an never ending horror film in the silence, and he knew she was trying as best as possible to let him have his silence without going too deep down.

"You don't have to," he smiled sadly at her, the last thing he wanted was to drag her further into his family's mess, no matter how much he wanted her at his side.

"I want to," she assured him, wrapping a throw rug from the back of the couch around herself as she made her way around to the front of the couch, leaving no room for further questioning.

"You, you can sleep with, on, we can clearly both fit on my bed, you know, if you want to, that is," he stammered, he was exhausted and the idea of her being close, the idea of getting some non-restless sleep was enticing, and he felt like he was asking too much, but she hadn't seem to mind so far.

"I thought you didn't sleep with others," she teased, tilting her head at his rambling.

"I – maybe I didn't mind it," he offered, a small grin slipping out at her playful tone.

"You sure?" she furrowed her brows, wanting to know he was one hundred percent certain.

"On one condition," he nodded in confirmation, smirking at her as she awaited the condition, "you change your alarm time."

---------------

Barely an hour later, she woke with a start, his thrashing more violent than the other morning, similar to the time in the station and she realised that it was because it was from a nightmare, and not from something outside his mind startling him. Earlier in their friendship she had knocked him out to stop his nightmares, but now she knew him better, she wasn't worried about her safety and she trusted him enough to know that it wasn't him, that he was hurting, that he was trapped.

"Hey, hey, hey, Bright, it's okay, it's okay," she repeated herself over and over to him, trying to calm him and trying to wake him without him hurting either of them.

"Sorry," he stated sheepishly once he came too, shame taking over the wild fear in his eyes, sitting up and staring into his dark loft as he tried to focus on calming his breaths.

"Do you want tea, or anything?" she offered calmly, laying back down on the bed when he shook his head in response, leaving no room for him to question if she wanted to leave, if she was uncomfortable or worried.

The ringing of her phone woke them both at a much more civilised time, the noise not startling him as much this time, seeing's as he was already half awake. Glancing at the lit up screen, she answered it in an annoyed tone, laying back on the bed as she gave the caller a few basic responses to what they were telling her before ending the call as she stood and started to get herself ready.

"What is it with your phone?" Malcolm joked, sitting on the edge of the bed lazily as watched her move around his loft as if it was hers; something that he found he didn't mind, in fact he liked it.

"It was JT, we have a body," she explained, quickly continuing before he had a chance to speak, "and no, you cannot come, they might not have laid any charges yet -"

"But they may and me helping on the case could cause issues at trial," he accepted it easier than she had expected.

Yep, but I can give you a lift to the hospital, or the station on my way?" she offered, not wanting to leave him by himself if she could help it, gaining a nod in response.

---------------

They all stood quietly as the doctor explained the situation, using words and phrases they weren't too sure on, and even had they understood, it wouldn't have changed their worry about their friend and colleague. Jessica had shut down everyone's offer to stay, telling them to go home and rest, that she would watch over him and let them know of any changes, and one by one, her strict mothering tone won out and the rest of the team left.

It was still well into the night by the time they made it back to Malcolm's loft, neither in a hurry to stop, to let their minds run. They made their way to his kitchen island quietly, Malcolm setting to pouring them a drink each – a non-alcoholic one for her - as she leaned back against the bench behind her, setting her hands on cold benchtop in an attempt to ground herself.

"He'll be okay," Malcolm stated, trying to convince her as much as him, moving to stand next to her, placing a tumbler next to her hand.

"You don't know that," Dani responded, adverting her glaze to the drink, making no move to take it, it wouldn't help distract her, it wouldn't help drown out the concern over the threat of yet another father figure in her life dying.

"It's Gil, if he can put up with my family, he can survive anything," he tried again, coaxing a small smile out of her, his own only lasting a few seconds.

"That is a good point," she turned to him, watching him place his tumbler on the bench too, his hand still on it to try and quieten the tremor, her hand coming to his to still it, as he did hers nights prior.

His eyes flew to hers at the action, the air thick around them as they both realised the lack of space between them, and neither found they cared. He hesitated a moment, seeing the hint of fire lurking up on the pain and worry in her eyes, and he wondered if his showed the same, his hesitation giving her the extra moment to come to the same decision, the both of them closing the gap simultaneously, the kiss rough and demanding, but with a level of tenderness that seemed to be their own kind of rapport with each other.

"This is a terrible idea," he chuckled, pulling back a moment, leaving his hand in her hair as he did, not quite ready to stop touching her, to give her up.

"Definitely," she nodded in agreement, closing the distance between them once more, chasing the distraction that kissing him offered, the distraction and the feeling that maybe things might just end up okay that he seemed to offer her.

"I might be out of practice, but I don't think this is what friends do," he pulled away once again, his hand on her waist holding her close, searching her face for permission, for assurance, for something he couldn't quite place.

"No, I don't think it is," she grinned back, her eyes dropping from his as she slowly started undoing his shirt buttons, sensing he still had something he wanted to say.

"I can't say I'm in the best headspace," he told her more seriously this time, and he could see that she took in his words, that she knew he was giving them and out, a way to walk away without changing anything too much.

"Are you ever?" she teased, playing with his loose shirt before conceding, "maybe I'm not either."

"So, we probably shouldn't?" his words came out as more of a question than a statement, she was after all, about his only friend, and as much as they both clearly were okay and wanting what was happening, he couldn't help but feel it was a line they shouldn't cross, that he shouldn't pull her further into the magnitude of issues that was him and his family.

"Probably not," she agreed, leaning back towards him, nonetheless, slipping his shirt off his shoulders as she trailed her lips across his neck, the action enticing a low growl from him as he slipped his hands under her shirt, working at pulling it up and off; both deciding that no matter how much they shouldn't, they both wanted to, needed to.

---------------

For the third morning in a row, they were awoken by the sound of the loud ringing of a phone, or as they quickly realised, both their phones, the ringing stopping as the calls went to voicemail. They both chose to ignore their current lack of clothing, and what had gone down the night prior, like a mutual decision that it wasn't to be commented on, that it wasn't the time and neither were ready to.

"Yours was ringing too," she stated with a raised eyebrow, her teasing tone dropped quickly when she realised that both their phones ringing could be bad.

Realising their phones were still up on the bench they made their way over, wanting both to know, but also an unease to the air about what the answer might be. Grabbing his shirt off the floor on the way, Dani covered herself up more, ignoring the look that he gave her at the sight, she was definitely not in a place to comment, instead she hit redial on J.T.'s missed call, gaining as little information as Malcolm seemed to be getting from his mother, both sighing with relief that it at least all seemed good.

---------------

Walking into the hallway that was becoming all too familiar, Dani placed the tray of coffees and pastries on the nurse's desk as they past, something that had become somewhat of a ritual for Malcolm and her as a way to feel like they were doing something, helping in some way. Catching sight of his mother, they continued on, the concern dissipating even more as his mother smiled warmly at their arrival.

"Ah, Malcolm, good timing," Jessica signalled for them to join her with the surgeon and Edrisa, "this lovely young man was just telling us that the surgery went well, and he should be out and in post op soon enough."

"So, you two are the ones bribing the nurses around here?" the surgeon laughed as he noticed that the two had a tray of hot drinks and pastries in their hands.

"What do you mean?" Dani asked, handing Jessica her coffee and pastry as Malcolm gave Edrisa hers.

"They told us that we had to save him, otherwise you two would stop bringing them treats," the surgeon explained, declining the offer of one from the tray.

"If a few coffees is all that it takes to ensure Gil's recovery, then we are more than happy to oblige," Malcolm responded quickly, smiling at his mother's approval in the unknown tactic.

"Wait, did you too come here together?" Edrisa asked, suddenly glancing between the two searching for answers.

"So, all good news then?" J.T. questioned before any response was made as he and Tally approached, the two on their way to an ultrasound appointment, having made sure to give themselves the time to stop in for an update on Gil's condition.

---------------

By the time the sun had well and truly gone down, and the precinct had all but cleared out, J.T. ended up having to all but order them to go home, as he himself collected his things to leave. Malcolm had commandeered a nearby desk as his own, trying to go through as much as they would give him access to, and had been ready to challenge the request, until Dani flicked her head in the direction of the elevator, silently telling him to follow, the three leaving together without a word.

There was a slight unease in the air as the two made their way into his loft, the unspoken agreement that they weren't talking about the night prior didn't change the fact that they both remembered it. Placing her keys on his counter, Dani moved around to his kitchen to work out if he did have anything somewhat acceptable in the food department or if she would be better off ordering them dinner, ignoring the feeling of domestically that riled up inside her.

"You really don't have to keep staying here," Malcolm broke the silence, pulling out a container of bird seed, Sunshine's constant chirping reminding him to feed her.

"You really think you should be left alone?" she raised her eyebrow, waiting for his counter, knowing full well no matter his response, it wouldn't change her opinion.

"I think it's unfair on you to be forced into the mess that is me and my family," he told her, watching her closely, profiling her reaction, a part of him wanting her to leave and another wanting her to stay, but all of him knowing it was her choice.

"What do you want for dinner?" she asked after a beat, not entirely sure how to respond, but choosing to ignore his comment instead of making a retort to it, she pulled out her phone and set to ordering them food instead.

---------------

Coming out of the bathroom the next morning, she froze for a moment at the sight of Malcolm's mother standing in his kitchen, take out bags from what she did not doubt were from some upper scale restaurant. Continuing on her way after an apologetic look from Malcolm, she knew that there was no escaping the other woman, and she understood the will he had occasionally for a new case, just to give himself an easy out from these kinds of situations.

"Dani, come join us dear," Jessica instructed, ushering the younger woman over to the counter with a warm smile.

"Is everything okay? Is Gil okay?" Dani asked, suddenly concerned that something might have happened over night, taking a seat nonetheless on the bar stool next to Malcolm.

"Yes, yes, I just wanted to check in Malcolm, make sure he's looking after himself," the older woman informed her, placing a coffee in front of her as she continued her previous task of unpacking the breakfast she had picked up on her way over.

"What she means is now that Gil's out of the woods, I'm her new distraction from Ainsley," Malcolm stated, smirking at his mother as he challenged her to refute his statement.

"Hush Malcolm, just eat your breakfast," Jessica chastised, staring him down until he picked up the fork and started playing with the food.

"What is it?" Malcolm turned his attention to his partner, noticing her furrowed brow as she read her text.

"The FBI, they're taking over the investigation," her information drawing everyone's attention, "and there's another body."

"Who?" he asked, dropping his pretence of trying to eat the food in front of him.

"I don't know, doesn't seem like they are wanting that known just yet," she shook her head, her source lacking any details that might be helpful.

---------------

The precinct was on edge the entire day, the FBI having taken over the conference room once more, rummaging through everything that they had found and keeping tight lipped over the new body, Agent Colette Swanson having returned with what seemed like a calm vengeance that put everyone on edge. It hadn't taken long for them to Malcolm into an interrogation, Dani calling Jessica the moment they did, knowing he wouldn't ask for counsel, but that his mother would force it upon him, a lawyer showing up not long after.

Both her and J.T. had tried to get more information about what was going on, but were met with walls at every turn and after reaching the conclusion they weren't going to get anywhere, they went back to focusing on the case they had. The two sharing a look of confusion when, after a few hours, one of the agents approached, requesting Dani join Colette in the conference room for a discussion, the request concerning them both as J.T. shot her a 'be careful' look as she agreed.

"We just need to confirm a few things with you Detective Powell, is that okay?" the agent who had come for her explained as she sat across from the two FBI agents.

"I guess I don't have much of a choice," Dani spoke jadedly, hoping at the very least, that she might get some information out of them.

"Do you know Mitchell Banks?" Colette jumped straight into her questions, watching her with close eye of a profiler, colder though, than the profiler she was used to.

"Should I?" she asked disinterestedly, the name not ringing a bell.

"He was a PI hired to look into the Whitley Family, Malcolm in particular," Colette explained, a distaste to her tone as she spoke of the former agent she had displayed a dislike for since the moment Dani had met her.

"I didn't know that, or him," Dani told them honestly, catching the way she referred to the PI in past tense and tucking the information away for later.

"Okay, do you happen to know where Malcolm Bright was last night? Between midnight and 3am to be exact," Agent Swanson questioned, the air around them shifting into something more of an interrogation.

"At his home," Dani stated without pause, holding eye contact with the other woman as if to prove to her she was being truthful.

"Do you know this because you were with him?" the other agent asked, his tone calmer and less interrogative than his partner, as if he was just interested in the facts.

"Yes," she confirmed, catching a hint of surprise at the ease at which she gave her on record confirmation.

"The whole time?" Colette jumped back in, raising her eyebrow at her question.

"Yes," Dani once again stated calmly, crossing her arms in annoyance at the line of questioning.

"Are the two of you in a relationship?" the profiler spoke with distaste, her dislike for the man in question evident in her voice, something that wasn't missed by the other two in the room.

"No," Dani's response coming quick and easily, she truthfully wasn't entirely sure how to define what they were, but she knew that they were at the very least a proper conversation away from any form of actual labels, probably more than one.

"But you are sleeping together?" Colette near stated, her tone cold and judgemental as she had already made up her mind.

"What does any of this have to do with it?" Dani asked instead of answering, something that she could tell that the agent across from her took as a confirmation.

"We are just trying to determine Malcolm's whereabouts for the murder," the other agent explained to her, placing a file in front of her with basic details on the murder of Mr Banks, confirming her theory that he was dead.

"Wait, you think Bright did this?" Dani queried, having skimmed over the file quickly.

"We found his DNA all over the victim, he has motive and what is becoming a method of killing," Colette informed her, a hint of a smirk across her face, as if she was glad to finally have something to use against him, something to lock him up with.

"It wasn't him, like I said, I was with him the whole night," Dani told them, her voice firm as she backed up her partner, suddenly glad that she had kept being insistent that he not be alone.

"Were you sleeping?" the man across from her asked, running through his own list of questions, less personally back ones.

"Yes – but" she responded, quickly going to back it up further, knowing that the answer would give them a leeway into discrediting her alibi.

"So, he could have snuck out," he asked, jumping in before she could finish, or his partner could ask her own, more personal question.

"No, I'm a light sleeper, I would have woken if he left," she told them, a glint of determination to her stare as she tried to make them believe her.

"He could have drugged you; it is a favourite in his family after all," Colette suggested, shrugging at the dig at his family, knowing it was true.

"He didn't drug me," Dani snapped back, quickly getting over the interrogation and starting to wonder if she should have a lawyer with her.

"There wasn't a time, at all that you left him alone? Maybe to shower? Duck out to get food, anything?" the other agent spoke up, cutting through the tense air between the two women, bringing it back to confirming her story.

"Only when I showered in the morning and when I came out his mother had arrived, so he would have had barely 5 minutes to himself," Dani explained, realising that he was trying to see if her story matched the one Malcolm must have given them, and she couldn't help but wonder if he had hesitated in telling them that she had been there.

"Who's to say you're not just covering for him because you're sleeping with him?" Agent Swanson sneered at her, disapprovingly, her partner opening his mouth as if to say something, before deciding to remain silent instead.

"We are done here," Dani told them both, knowing she had answered enough of their questions.

"We are done when I say we are," Colette snapped back, glancing at her partner for back up and simmering down slightly when she found none.

"No, you are angry that to stick this murder on him you have to say a NYPD detective is lying and if the evidence is the same as Eddie's then that draws that charge into question as well," Dani pointed out, a slight rise to her voice as she reasoned, standing to leave.

"I thought you were smarter than to get involved with him," Colette told her in a disappointed tone, shaking her head at the detective.

"Look, I know you don't think very highly of him, but if you have any respect towards me, you have to at least consider the possibility he is being framed," Dani ignored her comment, glancing between the two as she spoke calmly, the lack of any response telling her that they begrudgingly could see her point as she left the conference room, needing some air.

#brightwell #malcolm bright #dani powell #malcolm x dani #prodigal son #prodigal son fox #prodigal son fic #brightwell fic #really don't know what this is #or why i wrote 5k on this #and still have another chapter to finish #but here I am #i think i stopped writing this as i was worried for season 2 #and was trying to distance myself from how much i loved these two #just in case #but thank god we got another season

[wikiangela-fanfics]

The One with the Blanket Hogging (Former) Angel

This is a fic I wrote last summer (at the end 08.2019, published a while later) at 5am while on vacation and sharing a bed with my cousin - she was hogging the covers and I was freezing haha (I kinda like the idea but I think I fucked it up while writing it - writing at 5 in the morning didn’t help - and I didn’t feel like rewriting it before posting)

Summary:  When Castiel is human, can't sleep (and obviously goes to Dean) and, as it turns out, is a blanket hogger.

Words: 1804

Ao3

***

Dean woke up at the sound of footsteps in the hallway. They were quiet, discreet, like someone didn't want to be heard. And they definitely weren't Sam's. His first instinct was getting his gun that was usually on his nightstand while he slept nowadays. He took the gun and stood up, already fully awake at the thought of an intruder in the bunker.

He quietly left his room, while holding his gun. He made his way down the hallway and stopped by Sam's room just to see if his brother is okay. But Sammy slept like a baby, so Dean decided he'll deal with whatever it is on his own.

He found his way to the war room. That's when he heard something from the kitchen, like shattering glass. Dean walked over there, quickly but quietly. He stopped before going into the kitchen, getting ready to shoot whatever was there. Then he walked in and…

"Dammit, Cas." he sighed, putting his gun away. Castiel was standing over shattered glass and spilled water on the floor, in a t-shirt and pajama pants. "I almost shot you. What the hell are you doin'?"

"Sorry." Cas muttered. "I couldn't sleep." He left out the part that he couldn't sleep since he lost his powers. But of course now he needed to sleep. And when he did sleep, he was usually having nightmares. "I wanted a glass of water, but…" he pointed at the glass on the floor. "Can't do even that now." he whispered.

"Cas, c'mon. You just have to get used to living like all of us humans. And I know you will. Besides, you don't need to be an angel to be awesome." he added a little quieter.

"Go back to sleep, Dean. I'll be fine." Cas said. He sounded tired. He was tired. Not only because he couldn't sleep. He was tired of being powerless. And unnecessary. He couldn't understand why Winchester brothers still claimed that they needed him. What could he give them now? Maybe just knowledge. But maybe not even that. He just felt like he didn't matter.

"No." Dean shook his head. "Sit down." he pointed at the chair by the table. Cas did as told, he didn't see why not. "Now, let's get you your water." Dean walked to the cupboard, took a glass, poured some water and gave it to Cas. "And I'm gonna clean this up." with that words, he started cleaning shattered glass and water from the floor.

"You don't have to do that, Dean." Cas said but Dean just shot him a look. A look that said: shut up and drink your water, I'm happy to do this for you.

When Dean was done with cleaning and Cas with water, they both stood up and for a while just looked at each other. Finally, Cas broke the silence.

"Thank you. I'm going to try to go to sleep now." and he wanted to go by Dean, who then took his hand, stopping him.

"You know… uh." he started. "If you need anything at all, you know where to find me." he said finally, kinda nervously, letting go of Castiel's hand.

Cas just smiled and went to his room. Soon after that Dean followed, but went to his own room, put the gun in its place, and went to sleep. Or tried to.

This time Dean also had trouble sleeping. Now he was aware of his best friend struggling with being human and doing the simplest human things… including sleeping.

He was lying there, not able to not think about Cas, for almost an hour. Then the tiredness won and he started to drift off… and that's when he heard a quiet knock on the door. He groaned into his pillow, got up, and went to open the door, already knowing who is on the other side.

"Hello Dean." Cas said shyly. Before he could say anything else, Dean pulled him inside.

"Sleep here. If you can't fall asleep and want to talk or something, just wake me." Dean said, going back to bed. And despite the fact that he wanted to sleep. If Cas needed him, he wanted to he there for him.

Cas didn't say anything. He just laid in bed on the other side and covered himself with half of the blanket.

They were close. Cas moved a little bit closer, because he didn't want to take the blanket from Dean. They didn't touch but Cas could feel the warmth coming from Dean's body and it was strangely comforting. Dean fell asleep quickly, he must've been tired. And for a while Castiel just looked at him. And maybe it was seeing the hunter next to him, or maybe just knowing that he's so close, just few centimeters… but Cas felt good and safe and for a moment he forgot about being a powerless human and slowly, really slowly, but finally he too fell asleep. By Dean's side. With a smile on his face.

***

Dean woke up freezing. Well, maybe not freezing, but certainly cold. At first he didn't know what was going on. Then he saw Cas next to him. Well, he saw just the blanket in which Castiel was literally wrapped, laying on his stomach with blanket on top and under him. But he was asleep.  

Dean smiled and tried to get a little bit of blanket to cover himself. He didn't want to get up to get another blanket, he was too tired. So he tried to pull the blanket from under Cas and failed. Well, he did it gently to not wake him up. But then he tried again, harder. This time he succeeded, but Cas, still asleep, pulled the blanket back. Dean looked at him with disbelief. Who knew that he was a blanket hogger?

"Cas." he whispered. "Cas, c'mon." he pulled on the blanket again. It was maybe ten minutes of that, not wanting to wake his friend up. "Well, fuck it." he said to himself.

Then he took Castiel by his shoulder and he turned him around so that Cas was on his back. Awake. Looking at Dean with wide eyes.

Now Dean was above Cas. Well, his legs were next to Cas', but his head was above Castiel's head and his hands on each side of Castiel's head.

"Sorry, buddy, but I had to wake you." Dean said quietly, more amused than anything else. "I'm cold and you were hogging the blanket and I'm too lazy to get out of bed."

"Sorry." Cas whispered, but he saw Dean smile so he didn't know what to think. Was he mad or not? It was hard to tell.

"It's fine. Now, can we share?" Dean asked, just wanting to get back to sleep.

Cas nodded. But Dean didn't move. He stayed there. For a while too long. Just looking at Cas.

"Dean?" Cas said with his sleepy, deep voice and Dean just couldn't bear it. He loved the way Cas was saying his name.

And maybe it was the time, around 5am. Or maybe it was being so close to Cas. Or probably the fact that Dean wasn't conscious enough to think. But he lowered his head and his lips met Cas'. Which is what he wanted to do probably since they met.

As soon as he did that, he wanted to pull away, feeling stupid. But then he felt Castiel's hand on the back of his neck, and the other one in his hair, holding him there and not letting him pull away. So he deepened the kiss, also putting his leg on the other side of Cas, so now he was directly on top of him. It was awesome. He never was that close to Castiel. And now their bodies were literally touching and he felt like he was on fire, but in a good way.

The kiss, at the beginning slow and unsure, turned into hot, passionate and deep. Soon it was full-on make out session.

They poured all their feelings in that kiss. All the repressed, denied feelings that were always there since the beginning. Even the feelings they didn't know were there up until this moment. It was the most amazing, breathtaking… and freeing experience in Dean's life.

When they finally pulled away, they were both out of breath. Which was a reminded of Cas being human again, who needed air to live.

"Hey, angel, what do you say we go to sleep now?" Dean panted, his forehead against Castiel's. There was a little smile on his face, and he couldn't help it. He finally kissed Cas. He spent so much time denying those feelings and cursing himself for always focusing on Cas' lips when they were talking. And now here they were.

"Okay." Cas answered with a smile. And before he could stop himself, he added quietly: "But I'm not an angel anymore."

Dean laid next to Cas, pulling him close and burying his nose in Cas' hair.

"You'll always be my angel." he whispered. Soon they both fell asleep with fond smiles on their faces, both of them for the first time in a long time truly happy.

***

When Sam woke up, the whole bunker was quiet. Nothing unusual. He made breakfast, although normally Dean would be already up and usually he was the one making breakfast. But then it was really late and Sam had no idea where his brother and their friend were. So he went to Dean's room to see if he was even there and to wake him up and… he smiled seeing them cuddled up in bed, still asleep.

"About damn time." he thought, closing the door and letting them sleep a little longer. They didn't have anything urgent to do right now.

And Sam never said a word. Well, when he was alone with his brother, he did tease him a little about it. Of course he did, they're brothers. But he never meant any of that in a bad way. He was so happy for his brother.

Dean and Cas started acting like a married couple, even more than they already were. And they would never really talk about it, but they knew that they were together and that they're gonna sleep in one bed from now on. And it wouldn’t really change their lives or affect their hunts. As human Cas would learn to believe when Dean would say that he needs him. He would start to feel important and necessary and like he matters. Because of Dean. Because he did matter to Dean.

And even if Castiel would get his angelic powers back and never needed to sleep again, he would still spend nights in Dean's bed, even just looking at him and being close to him. Both of them were happier than ever.

#Destiel #Destiel fanfic #fluff fluff fluff #so much fluff #i write only fluff #blanket hogging #cas and dean #it doesn't really make sense #but i kinda like it #fanfic #destiel oneshot #oneshot #old fic

[remywrites5]

Please, please, if it's not too much trouble, could you write a fluffy Stucky soulmate au?? Thanks!

           Bucky’s eyes flew open, taking in the almost sickening hospital white of his apartment ceiling, and groaned so loudly he was sure everyone in the building could hear it. He pawed around his bed in search of his phone, finding it rolled up in his duvet. He winced slightly as the screen lit up and his eyes took a moment to focus enough to read the time.

           5:45 in the morning.

           If Bucky ever found his soulmate he was absolutely going to kill him. Whoever it was kept a rigorous schedule, waking up early nearly every morning. The latest Bucky had ever slept in was 7am for the past five years. He would have preferred a soulmate that was an insomniac. Just last Friday night Bucky had gone out to the club and ended up falling asleep by 10:30pm with Nat having to carry him home. He hadn’t even had a chance to get drunk or hit on a few hot guys.

           Bucky was starting to think his soulmate was an old man. It was the only explanation for his soulmates complete lack of any apparent social life. 

           Knowing full well he wouldn’t be able to fall back asleep, because his asshole of a soulmate apparently was a morning person, he stumbled into his kitchen in search of coffee. He leaned against the counter and yawned as he watched it brew, dripping slowly into the pot. Bucky thought he might drink the whole thing.

           He rubbed his eyes and sighed heavily. If he ever met his fucking soulmate he was going to have a long talk about having a little consideration.Although that wasn’t exactly fair as Bucky was already planning on getting him back by taking a midafternoon nap. Hopefully his soulmate didn’t have any pressing plans.

           He downed his first cup of coffee for the day and went off to shower. Might as well wake up properly.

                                                           ***

           Steve was in the middle of teaching his self-defense class when he hit the ground hard. He came to an hour later on the sofa in his shared office with Sam. “What happened?” he asked, scrubbing his hand over his face.

           “Your soulmate being a dickhead as per usual,” Sam answered from his seat behind his desk. He gave Steve a pointed look.

           “Don’t call them that,” Steve said, sitting up quickly and resting his elbows on his knees. “It’s my fault. I woke up early this morning.”

           “You wake up early every morning,” Sam reminded him. “They should be used to it by now.”

           Steve shrugged. “I can’t exactly be mad, can I?”

           “You can,” Sam said, crossing his arms over his chest and leaning back in his chair. “But you won’t.”

           Steve smiled to himself. Sam had a point there. No matter how his soulmate retaliated, Steve just couldn’t bring it in him to be angry about it. Sure, he’d prefer not fainting like a maiden during work, but he knew he kept strange hours. He had probably inconvenienced his soulmate more than a few times. A part of him was amused in the ways his soulmate chose to get back at him for being an early riser. Steve always woke up early for a run before he had to come open the gym. He knew it wasn’t ideal considering he had no idea what kind of life his soulmate led.

           Maybe he would let his soulmate sleep in tomorrow.

                                                           ***

           Bucky was surprised when he didn’t wake up until 7am. He could tell his soulmate had done it on purpose. He only woke up that late on weekends. Bucky could only hope it had something to do with his job because otherwise there was no excuse for not sleeping in late on a Sunday. Bucky would have if that was still an option for him.

           His hope that his soulmate was switching to a different sleep schedule was short lived. The next morning he found himself awake at 5am. Bucky was murderous as he got his usual pot of coffee and practically down the whole thing. Feeling on a rampage, he got dressed and went out for a walk. His heavy boots helped alleviate some of his anger as he stomped around in the early morning dew.

           He let his mind wander as he walked and nearly missed the guy out for a jog who was headed straight towards him, their paths about to collide unless one of them moved.

           It didn’t matter in the end because as soon as their eyes met, both of them collapsed on the bridge.

           Bucky sat up a moment later, his head hurting from landing on the pavement, and he rubbed it sourly. He looked over and got the first proper look at his soulmate. He’d heard stories of people meeting their soulmates, the force of the connection making you pass out from being close for the first time. Even after regaining consciousness, Bucky could still feel it drumming through him.

           “Please tell me you haven’t been waking me up this early every day for the past five fucking years just so you could go for a run!” Bucky said accusingly at his soulmate. Back when he was a dumb kid who dreamed of meeting his soulmate he would imagine what he would say to them. Now he was too annoyed to say anything else.

           Instead of being offended, his soulmate just laughed and hopped up onto his feet. He held his hand out for Bucky to help him up off the ground. “Sorry about that,” he said, hauling Bucky to his feet. “I like to jog before work and I have to open up by eight.”

           Bucky dusted himself off to stop himself from looking into those amazingly clear blue eyes. He wondered what he must look like to his soulmate, tired with bags under his eyes, probably half-dead. “And you couldn’t jog after work?” Bucky asked petulantly, trying his best to ignore how breathtaking his soulmate was and just concentrate on all the grievances he had against him.

           His soulmate grinned, showing off his perfect teeth.“Couldn’t risk it with those late afternoon naps you like to take,” he ribbed Bucky gently.

           “I only took those because you kept waking me up at the crack of dawn,” Bucky shot back, raising an eyebrow.

           “Steve Rogers,” his soulmate said, holding out his hand. “It’s nice to meet you, finally.”

           Bucky took his hand and shook it. “Bucky Barnes. Any chance I could bribe you into sleeping in past noon one of these days?”

           Steve considered it, scratching idly as his chin. “I don’t know, it would depend on what you were planning to bribe me with.”

           Bucky huffed, tucking his hair behind his ear. “What do you want?”

           Steve smiled in a way that was positively wicked. Bucky was starting to like him already. “I’m not sure it’s polite to say for our first meeting.”

           Bucky barked out a laugh. “You’re something else, Rogers.”

                                                           ***

           Bucky groaned as his eyes fluttered open. “Go the fuck back to sleep, Stevie,” he grumbled, burying his face away in Steve’s warm neck.

           Steve carded his fingers through Bucky’s hair. “Gotta get up, Buck.”

           “No,” Bucky said stubbornly. “I have ways of keeping you in bed, Rogers.”

           Steve laughed and put his arms around Bucky. “I know you do,” he said fondly. Already he was so used to this, the push and pull he had with Bucky. The way they teased and taunted each other like school children. A part of him felt like if they had met as kids they would have been best friends, even though sometimes they drove each other up the fucking wall.

           He knew Bucky didn’t really mind the early morning starts anymore. After all, they went to bed together early every night and woke up at the same time every morning.

           “You know you’re physique isn’t going to crumble if you skip a run every once in a while,” Bucky mumbled grumpily.

           Steve pressed a kiss to Bucky’s head to placate him. “You could always run with me.”

           “Ugh,” Bucky said, tightening his grip of Steve. “Hard pass.”

           “Fine then, lazy ass,” Steve said, extracting himself from Bucky. “Just wait until we’re old and I’m in peak physical condition and you’re a potato.”

           Bucky snorted. “Good, then I’ll die first and finally get some fucking sleep.”

           Steve frowned. “That’s not funny, you know.”

           Bucky sat up and looked thoroughly chastised. “Sorry,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck self-consciously. “Bad joke.”

           Steve walked over and cupped Bucky’s face in his hands, smiling at him affectionately. “All your jokes are bad jokes.”

           Bucky brought his hands up and curled them around Steve’s wrists. “Watch it, pal,” he said but the words had no real bite to them. Bucky knew Steve was going in for a kiss and met him halfway there.The kiss was soft and sweet, perfect in the way kissing Bucky always was. 

           “Did you just friend-zone me?” Steve asked in amusement after breaking the kiss. 

           Bucky rolled his eyes. “And you think my jokes are bad?”

           Steve chuckled and kissed Bucky again. “Must be why we’re soulmates.”

           Buck smiled at Steve in a way he’d never seen Bucky smile at anyone else in the three months since they’d found each other. The sight of it made warmth bloom in Steve’s chest knowing that smile was just for him, a secret the two of them shared. “Yeah,” Bucky said softly, pulling Steve into another kiss. “Must be.”

#stucky #soulmate AU #anon prompt #I write things #long post #fluff #steve rogers x bucky barnes

[oxsix]

How a home is made

Kitty builds a family; step by step. In which bonds are forged over cups of tea. 

AO3 link

Just a fluffy drabble about KHoward being loved, because she deserves it

Kitty is timid at first. They all are, in a way, when they first move in together. After all, they've only really known each other for a few weeks, and some of them aren't on the best of terms.

It was an awful idea, really, for them to all live together. But the money is running out, and the people who'd brought them back can't afford to keep renting them all separate places. And so, here they are, in a relatively small, six bedroom house outside of London.

And Kitty isn't really sure where she stands. She hadn't known most of them the first time, not even her own cousin, and she doesn't want to get herself caught up in the middle of the other women's disagreements.

- - - 

Anna, surprisingly, is exactly the same as she has always been. She's a bright spot in Kitty's darker days, and she always seems to know when she's at her lowest. She's there for Kitty in those times, with kind words, whispered affirmations and jokes that always seem to catch Kitty off-guard, no matter how prepared she thinks she is.

And it's perfect, in it's way; it's hard to keep crying when Anna is around. Kitty is grateful, beyond what words could express, for her old friend. She worries, though, that she relies too much on Anna's support; that she might be a drain on her friends happiness. But every time, Anna reassures her that it's okay, that this is what friends are for.

Still, it's this that drives Kitty to interact with the others. At the very least, she doesn't want to be attached to Anna at all times.

- - -

While Anna and Cathy had had a little tension between them when they'd first come back, they'd quickly settled and forgotten their differences. Both were fairly civil with each other, anyhow, and they were the first of then to really form a friendship, outside of Kitty and Anna.

They spend a lot of quieter moments together—reading peacefully, or avidly discussing the intricacies of the modern world and their new findings.

The two of them are also the ones Kitty feels most comfortable around, in the beginning. Anna is an old friend, of course. But Parr is surprisingly easy for her to be around, too.

She has quite a gentle presence, and always greets Kitty pleasantly, talking idly about her latest areas of interest. She's kind, and open, and always makes conversation with Kitty, but Kitty doesn't feel any pressure to keep them going. The ebb and flow of their discussions feels comfortable. Parr was the sort of person who was happy to spend time with her, without expecting anything from her.

On warmer mornings, the two of them sit outside with their cups of tea, and watch the birds. They're generally up last, Kitty thanks to her nightmares, and Cathy because of her tendency to become entirely absorbed in her work.

Kitty likes this new friendship. She likes their quiet, laid-back familiarity. She likes being able to spend time with someone who isn't asking for anything in return. She'd had enough of that the first time.

- - - 

It takes a lot longer for Kitty to get closer to the others  though. Unsurprisingly, her cousin is the first of the three to let Kitty in.

It happens when Kitty hears quiet, muffled sobs from Anne's room late at night. She's panicking, Kitty can tell—tell she's been there plenty times before. She stands on the other side of the door, wondering if it would be an invasion of Anne's privacy to enter.

When she hears Anne let out a particularly heart-wrenching whimper in her sleep, she makes up her mind. She slowly opens the door, and moves to the side of the bed. Gently, she shakes her estranged cousin awake.

Her eyes are wide: confused and frightened. She looks disorientated and startled by Kitty's presence. Once she gets her bearings, she looks upset.

"What are you doing here?" She asks, uncomfortable at being seen in such a vulnerable moment.

"Sorry, I just.. well, I heard you and thought you must be having a nightmare, and–it's just," she doesn't know what to say; she only wanted to help, but she hardly knows Anne. "I get them, too. I know what it's like, so I thought... you might like some company?"

Anne looks at her then, softly. She doesn't say anything.

She moves over, and gestures for Kitty to lie with her. She does, and Anne rests her head on her younger cousins shoulder. She sniffles quietly, and Kitty absent-mindedly runs her hands through the other girl's hair, as Anna often does when she needs comforting.

They stay like that, until they both fall asleep. Neither of them says anything—they don't need to. The quiet speaks for them.

They fall into a routine after this. When one of them had a nightmare, or can't sleep for memories of apathetic crowds and sharp blades–they go to the other's room, and they spend the night together, soothed by the knowledge that their pain is shared, and understood.

- - -

Jane is next, and it's surprising how close the two of them become. She's cold at first, distant from everyone.

Kitty doesn't see her much at all, only hears her during her heated arguments with Anna. They aren't as common as Anne's arguments with Catalina; the two of them lean more towards cold, barbed words and avoidance than fiery debate. But, when they do erupt, well—it's a lot.

The rest of the house tends to stay out of their way on these bad days—both women are full of hell after their conflicts.

It's on one of these days that Kitty first understands who Jane really is. The argument that morning—prompted by a disagreement about the usage of milk—had been particularly vitriolic, and both women had said things that they would one day regret. Things that hit a little too close to home.

A few minutes after the yelling stops, Kitty goes to the kitchen to make herself some breakfast, only to find Jane still there, standing stock-still, a mug held firmly in her grip. Her breathing is heavy and she is staring fixedly out of the window, at nothing in particular. Kitty moves closer, and coughs gently to make her presence known.

Jane startles at this, jolting suddenly. The mug falls from her hand and clatters into the sink, shattering. Jane only panics more. Her eyes are wild with fear. She looks like she's afraid for her life, and Kitty doesn't thinks she's quite here with her.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry," the older woman repeats, over and over until her voice devolves into sobs. Kitty gently puts a hand on her back. She asks what's wrong.

Jane doesn't answer, and she doesn't need to. Kitty understands. Jane's relationship with Henry hadn't been perfect, either. Even the one he'd supposedly loved had suffered because of him. And that fear had followed Jane into this life, just like it had Kitty.

So Kitty sits with her, until the tears subside.

The next night, as usual, Kitty is woken by a nightmare. But this time, when she wakes, clutching at her throat, she feels a weight settle gently at the end of her bed. She expects it to be Anne.

It isn't. Jane takes Kitty into her arms and lies with her. She hums softly, as Kitty's panic dissipates.

And in her arms, Kitty feels safer than she has felt for a long time. Nobody has held her like this since her mother died. It's something Kitty hadn't realised she was missing.

She feels protected, and valued. She feels like a kid again. And it's a relief. She never really had the chance, last time.

Kitty falls asleep there, and she and Jane quickly become like a real mother and daughter.

And it works. After all, Jane had missed out on her chance to be a mother last time, and Kitty had missed out on the chance to have one. This time, neither of them were going to miss their chance.

Kitty is grateful for Jane, even if Anne resents their bond at first.

- - -

The final piece of the puzzle takes even longer to fall into place.

Catalina scares Kitty, at first. She's aloof, dignified—every bit a Queen. And she's real royalty, not like Katherine.

As much as the first queen makes her feelings about Anne widely known, she keeps most things to herself. She's extremely distant with Kitty, and she isn't sure how she should interact with her.

They've barely said two words to each other, outside of "hello" and "good morning." Kitty has seen her have short, pleasant conversations with Jane, but even they are fairly formal.

The only person she's seen Catalina be genuinely open with is Cathy. She tries to keep this hidden too, but Kitty has seen the soft smile she deserves for her God daughter, as well as the way she always seems to have a coffee made for the younger woman when she finally resurfaces from her bedroom at midday.

It's wordless, and subtle. But Kitty sees it.

The date Kitty comes to understand Aragon is the 18th of February, and Kitty doesn't know, at the time, why this is significant. But, that morning, Catalina is even more withdrawn than usual. She doesn't say good morning, doesn't speak to Jane, and when Cathy comes down, there's no coffee waiting for her. She gives Kitty an enquiring look as she makes a mug for herself. Kitty shrugs, and leave the room with the two mugs of tea she has made.

She finds Aragon outside. Definitely not dressed appropriately for the cold weather, and clutching a mug of coffee—which must have gone cold by now—so tightly that her knuckles are white.

As Kitty approaches, Catalina doesn't look at her. That's when Kitty notices the tear tracks down her face. She says nothing, only hands the other woman a hot cup of tea, and a throw she'd taken from the living room.

Silently, Aragon accepts them. She looks like she wants to say something, but she doesn't.

A few days later, Kitty is up uncharacteristically early in the morning. She'd woken from a nightmare and hadn't managed to get back to sleep.

It's about 5am, and when she gets downstairs, she finds Catalina alone in the kitchen, in her dressing gown.

"You're up early." She remarks.

"Bad dream" Kitty replies. It's the most they've ever spoken at once.

Aragon places a mug of tea in front of her, then sits across the table.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

The question takes Kitty by surprise, and it's all she needs to say. Words spill from Kitty's mouth, and she isn't sure at which point she starts crying.

She bares her soul, and Catalina sits quietly, listening. Eventually, she moves around the table, and Kitty's head is on her shoulder as she cries.

Her hand moves softly through Kitty's hair, gently working it's way through every tangle in her bed-head.

It's comforting, and Kitty remembers that Catalina has done this before. Her own daughter had been around Kitty's age when they'd last seen each other.

Again, Kitty sees silent tears well in the other woman's eyes, and she realises that Aragon needs this just as much as she does. She understands why she has been so gentle with Parr, and so eager to speak with Jane.

She's clutching to anything that might remind her of Mary. Yesterday was her birthday. Aragon missed her daughter, but she couldn't say it.

And Kitty understood, now, why it had taken her song to open up.

She smiles softly at Catalina, who sniffles and wipes her eyes.

"Never speak of this again," she says, with what Kitty thinks is supposed to be a wink.

"I won't," she giggles, and winks back. "Promise."

And, while she's not good at saying it, Kitty knows that she cares for her.

- - -

And this is how Kitty's family begins.

Over time, the shouting matches cease. Arguments die, old enemies reconcile. It takes time, and no small amount of effort on Kitty’s part, but her family becomes a unit.

Tearful confessions and overdue apologies lead to deeper understanding between them all, and little by little, they grow closer.

Finally, Kitty has the family she never had back then, and she loves them more than anything.

#six the musical fanfic #six fanfiction #six the musical #katherine howard #anna von kleve #catherine parr #anne boleyn #jane seymour #catherine of aragon