#14 lines from love letters or suicide notes

[random-poetry-account]

#poetry #all the things im not #doc luben #14 lines from love letters or suicide notes #charles bukowski #mahmoud darwish #f. scott fitzgerald #sally rooney #conversations with friends #ryan o'connell #david wojnarowicz #a memoir of disintegration #sylvia plath #three women #mieko kawakami #heaven #hanif abdurraqib #a fortune for your disaster

[rapidstar64]

My personal collection of unhinged poetry memes

#poetry #unhinged memes #richard siken #crush quotes #14 lines from love letters or suicide notes #doc luben #I’m sorry I am gatreful

[yamahathebike]

14 Lines From Love Letters Or Suicide Notes - Doc Luben

one. don't freak out.

two. we both know this has been coming for a long time.

three. i've been staying awake at night, wondering if i should tell you.

four. i bought the kind of crackers you can eat. they are in the hall cupboard.

five. now that we have watched all the episodes of True Blood, i do not know what else to do next.

six. i always imagined this would happen without warning, and like suddenly on an ocean cliffside. but this is the kind of thing where waiting for the time to be right would just mean waiting forever.

seven. i've just been too afraid for too long.

eight. i came home on tuesday and found all of the chairs i own stacked in a tower in the kitchen. i don't know how long they have been like that, but it could only have been me who did it. it's the kind of thing a ghost might to to prove to the living that he is still there. i am haunting my own apartment.

nine. my grandmother was still alive when i was five years old and asked me to check and see if the iron was hot enough yet. so i pressed my hand against it, and it was red and screaming for hours. twenty-five years later, she would still sometimes apologize, in the middle of conversations, "i feel so bad about making you touch the iron," she'd say as though it had just happened. i can't imagine how we forvive ourselves for all the things we didn't say until it was too late. but how else to you tell if something is hot but to touch it?

ten. i keep imagining my furniture in your apartment.

eleven. i wonder how many likes this will get on facebook.

twelve. my dad used to tell same joke, but i can't remember the punchline.

thirteen. i was eight years old, and it took three weeks, three eight year old weeks, imagine, to gather everything i would need to be batman. rope. boomerangs. a mardi gras mask with the beads cut off. i couldn't find a cave near my house, so i buried them in a bundle under the ivy. for years after, i tried to find that spot again. the ivy grew too fast. i searched in so many spots, it seemed impossible that i had missed one, but i never found it. how can something be there and then not be there? how do we forgive ourselves for all the things we did not become?

fourteen. i never had the courage to buy bright green sheets. i wanted them, but thought they were too brash, even with no one but me to see them. i bought a set yesterday and put them on the bed. i knew that you would like them.

#here's one of my favorite poems before i share my own #doc luben #14 lines from love letters or suicide notes #poems #poem #poetry

[asoftepiloguemylove]

"How do we forgive ourselves for all of the things we did not become?"

Doc Luben, 14 Lines from Love Letters or Suicide Notes

#doc luben #14 lines from love letters or suicide notes #poetry #poem #slam poetry #spoken poetry #spilled words #spilled thoughts #spilled poetry #spilled ink #spilled writing #dark academia poem #dark academia quote #dark academia poetry #dark academia writing #dark academia #tw suicide

[thwartedromantic]

How do we forgive ourselves for all the things we did not become?

-Doc Luben, 14 Lines from Love Letters or Suicide Notes

#quote #button poetry #doc luben #14 lines from love letters or suicide notes #creative writing #loss #forgiveness #potential

[pag-iisa]

14 Lines from Love Letters or Suicide Notes — Doc Luben

1. Don't freak out.

2. We both know this have been coming for a long time.

3. I've been staying awake at night wondering if i should tell you.

4. I bought the kind of crackers you can eat. They are in the hall cupboard.

5. Now that we have watched all the episodes of True Blood, I do not know what else to do next.

6. I always imagined this would happen without warning, like suddenly on an ocean cliff side but this is the kind of thing where waiting for the time to be right would just mean waiting forever.

7. I've just been too afraid for too long.

8. I came home on Tuesday and found all of the chairs that I own stacked in a tower in the center of my kitchen. I don't know how long they had been like that but it can only be me that did it. It's the kind of thing a ghost might do to prove to the living that he is still there. I am haunting my own apartment.

9. My grandmother was still alive when I was 5 years old and she asked me to check and see if the iron was hot enough yet so I pressed my hand against it and it was red and screaming for hours. 25 years later, she would still sometimes apologize in the middle of conversations, "I feel so bad about making you touch the iron" she'd say, as though it had just happened. I cannot imagine how we forgive ourselves for all the things we didn't say until it was too late. But how else do you tell if something is hot but to touch it?

10. I keep imagining my furniture in your apartment.

11. I wonder how many likes this will get on Facebook.

12. My dad always used to tell the same joke but I can't remember the punchline.

13. I was 8 years old and it took 3 weeks (3 8-year old weeks, imagine) to gather everything that I would need to be Batman. Rope, boomerang, a Mardi Gras mask with the beads cut off. I couldn't find a cave near my house, so I buried them all in a bundle under the ivy. For years after, I tried to find that spot again. The ivy grew too fast. I searched in so many spots. It seemed impossible that I had missed one. But I never found it. How can something be there, and then not be there? How do we forgive ourselves for all the things we did not become?

14. I never had the courage to buy bright green sheets. I wanted them, but thought they were too brash, even with no one but me to see them. I bought a set yesterday and put them on the bed. I knew that you would like them.

#14 lines from love letters or suicide notes

[firefly-foibles]

“But how else do you tell if something is hot but to touch it” 14 lines from love letters or suicide notes, Doc Luben

#doc luben #button poetry #slam poetry #14 lines from love letters or suicide notes

[maniccri]

"I cannot imagine how we forgive ourselves for all the things we didn't say until it was too late."

~Doc Luben, 14 Lines from Love Letters or Suicide Notes

#poetry #doc luben #14 Lines from Love Letters or Suicide Notes #button poetry #profound #ok byeee #Youtube

[fromdarzaitoleeza]

from Chorus, eds. Saul Williams, Dufflyn Lammers & Aja Monet / 14 lines from love letters or suicide notes, david "doc" luben

#book quotes #dark acadamia aesthetic #dark acadamia quotes #classic literature #english literature #literature #literature quotes #lit #web weaving #quotes #quotation #words #poetry #poem #spilled writing #spilled ink #typography #dead poets society #writing #light academia #light acadamia aesthetic #chaotic acadmeia quotes #chaotic academia #chaotic academic aesthetic #dark academia #spilled thoughts #academia #aesthetic #poets and writers #books and libraries

[fearbehere]

i’ve wasted my life running away from myself

a breath of life, clarice lispector / 14 lines from love letters or suicide notes, doc luben / the archer, taylor swift / close to the knives: a memoir of disintegration, david wojnarowicz / portrait of fyderyck in shifting light, richard siken / how to never stop being sad, dandelion hands / holly warburton / the torn up road, richard siken / soda, nothing but thieves / extracting the stone of madness, alejandra pizarnik

#web weaving #web weave #taylor swift #richard siken #feariginals

[paladinbaby]

can’t call you a stranger, but can’t call you up

14 lines from love letters or suicide notes, doc luben / the power unbound, freya marske; photo my own / biotherm (for bill berkson), frank o’hara / georgia, phoebe bridgers / joy is not promised to you, hanif abdurraqib interviewed by ruth awad / wolf or-7, natalie diaz / i’m not speaking first, hala alyan / owl and pussycat some years later, margaret atwood / the dogs i have kissed, trista mateer / i had a dream about you, richard siken

[Image Description: Ten images of text.

1: “The ivy grew too fast. I searched in so many spots. It seemed impossible that I had missed one. But I never found it. How can something be there, and then not there? How do we forgive ourselves for all the things we did not become?”

2: A square photo of the sky at sunset. There are dark trees along the bottom edge. The sky is blue but is mostly covered in clouds. Text in the top left corner reads “The past had a heavy fist around his heart. What he was wait-ing for was for it to physically hurt.” The text is a split up photo of a printed line.

3: “the moon is rising / I am always thinking of the moon rising / I am always thinking of you”

4: Black text on a blue background. “Will you have me / Or watch me fall? / If I fix you / Will you hate me?”

5: “I think what I value most are people who love me enough to be angry at me then come back and still love me. People who are patient with me when they have no right to be. People who know me well enough to know that I am a collage of failures with some really good intentions.”

6: “I confuse instinct for desire - isn’t bite also touch?” Bite and touch are written in italics. The whole line is highlighted in red.

7: “I want to love something. / I want to love something without having to apologise for it. Please don’t tell.”

8: “Anything can become a saint if you pray to it enough -”

9: A photo of a poem written out in a lined notebook, the spiral binding is visible on the right edge of the image. The first line is in block capitals. “I Swear Somewhere This Works

In a parallel universe or another world / or a different life

we sit across from each other

at the kitchen table

and go over / the grocery / list.”

10: “In the dream I don’t tell anyone, you put your head in my lap.” End ID.]

#litstack #web weaving #richard siken #hanif abdurraqib #power unbound #freya marske #frank o’hara #natalie diaz #pheobe bridgers #personal #c: lost township #onion

[fakakta-art]

How do we forgive ourselves for

all of the things we did not become? Doc Luben, "14 Lines from Love Letters or Suicide Notes" line 13.

dropped everything to make an angsty drawing of my favorite boy on the anniversary of his death. Happier pic under the read more cause i made myself sad

he deserves all the hugs today

#dc #jason todd #red hood #dc comics #batfamily #my art #i wanted to experiment w style and then i checked my calendar!

[chuuyrr]

bsd characters receive love letters from scarlet witch! baby fushiguro! reader — a valentine's day special

jujutsu kaisen x reader x bungo stray dogs

masterlist of the series

╰➤ CW(s): possible spoilers for bungou stray dogs and jujutsu kaisen, fluff/comfort content

╰➤ PAIRING(s): platonic! bungo stray dogs & jujutsu kaisen x child! reader

╰➤ SYNOPSIS: in which our beloved bungo stray dogs characters, especially dazai osamu, receive valentine's day love letters and discover that they came from you, the dimensional traveling scarlet witch who happens to come from a world of curses and sorcerers they knew and loved like a little sister or niece. click to view the full request here !

there wasn't much work in the armed detective agency office, but dazai, being dazai, was exaggerating how it was february 14—a day of love and romance while also throwing in some comments about having someone to commit double suicide with, much to atsushi's dismay.

being the armed detective agency, they just weren't ones for holidays. duties calls given their line of work. it just so happened that today was miraculously not loaded with investigations and such.

while everyone else was just getting through the day, kunikida had returned from his own work, much to everyone's and dazai's surprise, carrying a large bag in one hand and a smaller bag in the other. it was quite amusing to see the young blonde man was struggling.

"woah, what'chu got there kunikida-kun?" ranpo inquired, poking at the large bag on the floor next to the blonde man.

"t-they're.. letters.." kunikida managed to say as he gasped for air with hands on his knees.

"letters? you mean work for us to do?!" exclaimed atsushi, whose mortified expression was mirrored by tanizaki.

"huh? no!" kunikida exclaimed, furrowing his brows, "they are love letters to dazai!"

everyone in the armed detective agency froze and practically screamed, "WHAT?!"

dazai's eyes lit up as he clasped his hands together, watching kunikida practically shove the massive bag of love letters towards him, "they're all for me? really?!"

"ugh, even until now, i still have the charms to lure ladies and gents!~" dazai exclaimed as he leaned back dramatically.

"that's an unusually large number of love letters," yosano's sweat dropped as she watched dazai open the bag to reveal more of the letters that were peeking out.

dazai chose the first envelope in the bag that had a "read me first!" note attached to it, and just by looking at it, he noticed that the handwriting was quite messy, which was appropriate for a child's handwriting.

he opened it right away and found his eyes widening in surprise, which somewhat alarmed everyone.

"what is it, dazai-san?" atsushi furrowed his brows in concern.

"it's from [name]-chan!" dazai exclaimed, his face bright and happy, waving the letter in the air as if he had won a million dollars.

"letters from [name]-chan?" kenji commented with a closed-eye smile, "aww, how sweet!"

"h-how?! [name]-chan wrote all of that?!" atsushi was in complete disbelief.

"happy valentine's day dazai-nii! sorry for not being able to go there to greet you and everyone myself," dazai read out the letter with a smile, everyone smiling in awe, "i've got you everyone letters though! the big bag is all yours dazai-nii, while the small bag contains everyone else's. all of the letters are written with love!"

"wow.. talk about favorites.." tanizaki chuckled softly and held the nape of his back as kunikida opened the smaller bag he was holding to reveal ten envelopes, each sealed with a barbie, baby shark, or pokemon sticker.

"of course, dazai-san would get more letters..." atsushi commented and patted tanizaki's shoulder as kunikida handed out letters to him, tanizaki, kyouka, kenji, yosano, ranpo, fukuzawa, naomi, and kirako.

"what else does the first letter say, dazai?" ranpo inquired, peering over dazai's shoulder with the others.

"[name]-chan said that the reason she couldn't come here was because her father had given her a temporary ban," dazai explained, his sweat and tone of voice dropping at his next words, "apparently [name]-chan had accidentally teleported to a world of human eating giants."

"is she okay?" kyouka clenched her fists, clearly worried about you, her little sister figure.

"[name]-chan is safe," dazai reassured the young girl as he read the letter, "her father just made her promise not to use her wiggly-woos magic for a little while, so she just sent us love letters instead."

"that's a good to hear, dazai," fukuzawa sighed in relief and placed a closed hand on his chest.

you expressed your heartfelt gratitude to dazai for looking after and loving you in the same way your adoptive father, gojo satoru, would, and as a result, you've always felt at ease with him and the rest of the armed detective agency. as dazai read your special valentine's day message for him, he couldn't help but giggle in delight.

dazai opened another envelope from the large bag meant for him and read its contents to the others, "hi dazai-nii! i'm at school today again but daddy's training gumi-nii, yuuji-nii, and nobara-nee today so i'm watching from the sides. i just saw gumi-nii faceplant and i can't stop laughing about it! it was really funny!"

"gumi-nii?" naomi cocked her head at the mention of an unfamiliar name.

"oh, that's [name]-chan's actual older brother," dazai explained, remembering you telling him everything about your family. "his name is megumi, but [name]-chan likes to call him gumi for short. yuuji and nobara, on the other hand, are megumi's classmates whom she sees as older brother and sister."

"oh! i didn't know [name]-chan had an actual older brother," atsushi commented, blinking.

dazai picked up another letter and read it, laughing, "hi dazai-nii! something funny happened today! i accidentally made yuuji-nii butt naked in front of the higher-ups with my wiggly-woos. i got in trouble though, but it's not too bad. daddy didn't give me kikufuku as usual for dessert after dinner as my punishment."

"she what?!" atsushi screamed as yosano, ranpo, and the others laughed and snickered.

"sometimes i forget just how powerful and funny [name]'s abilities can be," yosano continued to giggle at the story.

"but that is quite unfortunate however.." fukuzawa's cleared his throat, his sweat dropping at the mere thought of it.

dazai kept opening more of the letters you'd given him and reading them to the rest of the armed detective agency.

the next one after the wiggly-woos magic error was you telling him about the mama duck and her baby chicks you saw while strolling through the forest part of the school, or more accurately, running away from the sight of gojo satoru and his students because you did mention that everyone was frantically looking for you while you were simply watching the ducks. you even drew those ducks on your letter, or at least attempted to. it was completely unrecognizable, but you tried, okay?

"are you sure those are ducks?" kunikida squinted his eyes and adjusted his glasses, his sweat dropping.

"hey, now! don't shame [name]-chan's art! they're ducks if you look closely, kunikida-kun!" dazai elbowed the young blonde man before turning to kyouka, "it's a very good drawing, right kyouka-chan?"

"mhm," kyouka gave dazai a thumbs-up as she hummed in agreement.

"ah, kids," kunikida sighed, stifling a soft chuckle as he shook his head.

the following letters followed suit. you told dazai about the cartoon shows you watched, the food you ate, and the toys and clothes you received from your father and family members.

in fact, you told him everything that happened in your life, including you tripping and using your magic to help people in secret, and as dazai opened and read through them all, he soon realized that the reason you had sent him so many letters was because you'd been writing for him since the beginning of february, and it was exactly as you quoted,

"it's not everyday that i get to be in your universe to know yours, so i want you to get to know what being in mine is like," was what you wrote in the last letter that was in the bottom of the bag, "i've read your mind once dazai-nii, and well, i figured it would be a good try if i were to show you what living is like through my eyes. to get you to know what life is like for me here."

the next words at the bottom of the letter softened dazai's eyes, which were accompanied by hearts and a doodle of you and him together.

"it's the little things that makes life worth living, and i hope you know that me learning i can travel and going to your universe, meeting you and everyone there, and the rest of your other selves makes life worth living because i got to meet a family i never thought i'd have. it makes me feel like i'm never alone and that it is fate that made it happen. oh, and dazai-nii? i love you in every universe. happy valentine's day!"

dazai would be lying if he said he wasn't emotional. as expressive and comical as he was, it was unusual for him to be emotional, just as it was rare for him to be caught off guard.

nonetheless, dazai leaned back further in his seat, closing his eyes as he smiled and took in your final message in the last letter, and softly whispered, "happy valentine's day, [name]-chan. i love you too in every universe."

it wasn't just dazai who was overcome with emotion. the rest of the armed detective agency was, too, as they opened the love letters they received from you next.

as you thanked fukuzawa for looking after you, he was soft with how you see him as an uncle or grandpa figure. you even drew cats on his letter and told fukuzawa about the cats you saw in the park when you returned to your world. he did, however, started sweating with worry when you told him you would summon an army of cats if he so desired because you love him that much!

yosano thought it was very sweet that you saw her as a very cool auntie figure with whom you enjoyed hanging out and talking about girl-stuff. you also thanked her for tending to your minor injuries while visiting and playing in their universe, and you expressed your love with doodles of butterflies because they remind you of her.

ranpo, like dazai, was smiling the entire time he read your praises for him being the best uncle detective you ever had and how much you enjoyed solving mysteries with him. you even sent ranpo some of your favorite candy and chocolate with the letter he received from you.

the tanizaki siblings were in awe by your valentine's day letter. naomi and junichiro were both happy to read your appreciation for them caring for and loving you as if you were their little sister.

kyouka became shy when she discovered your letter for her littered with doodles of bunnies and hydrangeas. even if it was barely recognizable, she still loved it because you remembered her, and most importantly, she's extremely glad you see her as an older sister figure whom you admire and look up to. kyouka became timid of your compliments about her beauty and coolness too, however.

kenji thought it was very sweet of you to look up to him as an older brother figure you admired. you drew a bunch of farm animals like cows and chickens on his letter, similar to kyouka's letter, even if it was barely recognizable due to your exceptional drawing abilities as a child.

kunikida was flustered, caught off guard by your sweet words of love and gratitude for him, but he was extremely proud of being the uncle figure you could look up to and rely on.

atsushi was beaming brightly as he read your valentine's day letter to him. you thanked atsushi and expressed your love for him by drawing a tiger and many hearts on his letter. he reminded you of your yuuji-nii, so you told him how grateful you were to have a yuuji-nii in this world, and not than just a gumi-nii :)

last but not least, kirako was surprised that you gave her a valentine's day letter despite not being as close to you as the others and was merely a clerk there, but she was extremely grateful that you acknowledged her presence and her caring for you alongside naomi.

the armed detective agency fell in love with your personal letters for them and couldn't help but wish you were here with them so they could personally thank you and tell you how much they love you, their little sharpest detective.

however, it wasn't just the armed detective agency that got love letters.

the port mafia was no exception.

"uwaaah! a love letter from [name]-chan, my best friend!" exclaimed an ecstatic elise as she admired the pink envelope chuuya handed her.

as amusing as it was, the port mafia truly believed they were receiving death threats from an organization when a bag of letters was mailed. they were shocked to learn that you had sent them love letters—as if they weren't already criminals. goodness, you truly were an angel sent from above.

"i've got a letter from [name]-chan, too?" koyou cupped her mouth with her kimono sleeve as chuuya handed her an envelope, blushing.

"apparently so, ane-san," said chuuya, shrugging his shoulders and casting a glance at the siblings under the black lizard who was in the office with them, "chibi also wrote letters to tachihara, hirotsu, gin, and akutagawa, even higuchi was no exception."

"my, my, isn't that sweet of her?" koyou's eyes softened and she smiled as she opened the envelope and read your letter towards to reveal your valentine's day message for her, which was you thanking her for looking after you when chuuya was busy—for being an older sister or mama-figure you could look up to and love.

as they read your letter, the akutagawa siblings remained silent, not daring to say anything. gin was blushing behind her mask. she clearly wasn't expecting your kind and sweet words. in contrast, akutagawa ryunosuke was more surprised than impressed by the revelation that he resembles your actual older brother, fushiguro megumi.

"whaaat? all of you received letters from [name]-chan?" mori inquired in a dramatic tone as looked at his subordinates, "i don't have one!"

"serves you right, rintaro!" elise laughed as she pointed at mori mockingly.

chuuya shrugged off the port mafia boss and turned your letter towards him, and it wasn't long before he began to smile in awe. you wrote him a poem, or rather tried to because some words didn't exactly rhyme, but it was very sweet—how much you looked up to him and loved him as your chuuya-nii! what really made chuuya happy was when you declared him your favorite over dazai. chuuya was going to blackmail that idiot vagabond with this.

"happy valentine's day, chibi," chuuya murmured to himself, his blue eyes softening and adoring the doodle you made of him and you, "heh, i'll make sure to give you a small bouquet of your favorite flowers and chocolates when you get here as my thanks."

[ author's notes ! happy belated valentine's day everyone. hope you enjoyed reading this, i had fun writing it even though it took me a while due to my hectic schedule lol. PLEASE i literally have midterm exams tomorrow and had to insert this fic in my schedule since it's no longer february 14 and i have to get it published soon. thank you for requesting dear anon, i hope you didn't mind me bullying mori here 😆]

#bungo stray dogs x reader #dazai x reader #chuuya x reader #bsd oneshot #bsd imagines #bsd scenarios #bsd hcs #bsd headcanons #bsd x reader #bsd x y/n #bsd x you #bsd fluff #bungo stray dogs headcanons #bungo stray dogs x you #jujutsu kaisen x reader #atsushi x reader #ranpo x reader #yosano x reader #fukuzawa x reader #koyou x reader #akutagawa x reader #gin x reader #tachihara x reader #gojo x reader #gojo satoru x reader

[angeloncewas]

I love you, ain't that the worst thing you ever heard?

[ love, wikipedia // falling, clare elsaesser // the kindly ones, neil gaiman // peace, taylor swift // capsized, clare elsaesser // 14 lines from love letters or suicide notes, doc luben // end of the world, clare elsaesser // oh distant you, wilbur soot // motherthing, ainslie hogarth ]

#web weave #web weaving #poetry #love #love as burden love as apology love as hope #i would like to disclaim these are my fears not my feelings #doc luben #clare elsaesser #taylor swift

[sameoldloneliness]

"like a wild animal gnawing off a leg to escape the jaws of a trap, i force myself to find new places to call home. inescapable choices to deal with inescapable tragedies. i just worry that i only have so many legs to stand on, and one day i'll fall and hit the basement of loneliness."

what is the nature of sacrifice?

fake out - fall out boy // atonement (2007) // the year in ugliness by arabelle sicardi // 14 lines from love letters or suicide notes by doc luben // crazy rich asians (2018) // the perks of being a wallflower (2012) // symphony no. 2 in c minor, or the resurrection symphony - gustav mahler // myself

#musings about intense convos with friends #thinking today about all that i had to give up or leave in pursuit of actually being happy #not just people and places but also ideas about myself and the world #fall out boy #atonement #arabelle sicardi #doc luben #crazy rich asians #the perks of being a wallflower #gustav mahler #webweaving #compilation #parallels #idk folks notes app poetry made itself into a post again

[tibby]

saw dir. james wan // “jigsaw survivor group” lawrence gordon as anonymous // “soft in the middle” shelby eileen // tumblr user chetungwan // “on the jellicoe road” melina marchetta // nikos kazantzakis // “grief lessons” four plays” euripides translated by anne carson // “14 lines from love letters or suicide notes” david ‘doc’ luben // “the haunting of hill house” dir. mike flanagan // “wuthering heights” emily brontë // “jigsaw survivor group” lawrence gordon as anonymous // saw: the final chapter dir. kevin greutert 

#sawposting #chainshipping #* #i feel INSANE