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Julia
|| TØP is my shit || life's a climb; but the view is great
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Ronald Reagan pretty much ruined everything for millennials.
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Please watch this video
https://www.buzzfeed.com/krystieyandoli/this-video-series-featuring-sarah-silverman-and-lena-dunham?utm_term=.udAwww75o2#.udAwww75o2
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twenty one pilots phone wallpapers
(no photos mine, I only cropped and edited them)
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Sometimes you have to put everything to the side just to take care of yourself. Don’t be afraid to say no when it’s necessary.
(via deeplifequotes)
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self harm
it's the 4th of july and for some reason today is a shitty day. my dad yelled at me the way the guy who molested me did. my mom is a bitch and didn't let me do anything. i'm sitting here and my friends are worried but like they don't care. they shouldn't. i'm on my period (i know tmi) but like that's a big reason why i'm so moody and why i can't fucking enjoy myself. i hate my body i hate who i am and life would be better w out me ruining it. don't worry i won't kill my self just saying today's been a rlly rlly bad day and i've been playing with the same grass for like the pst 3 hours and my bff saw my fingernails dug into my hand and she pulled it out. i'm so thankful.
#suicde#emotiones#emotion#emotional#sad#depressed#depressing thoughts#depression#depressive#teenage#teen#my life#life#suicdal#self harm#selfharm#cutting#slit#wristslit#wrist#ocd#anxiety#adhd
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#depression#depressive#mood#thoughts#weird#emotiones#emotional#emotion#teenage#teen#wtf#kill me#lifestyle#life#my post#my life
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What do you say to the man who molested you?
Hello. what do you say to someone who forced you against your will? i don't know what i would say. my heart still skips beats whenever i see a red truck, my soul aches because for the longest time i would cry over you. i'd cry wondering if it was me, if i was the messed up one. i hated myself so bad. you taught me how to hate myself. you taught me that i wasn't enough. if i didn't kiss you the right way you made me kiss the side of my house. it wasn't my choice. i was so fucked up because of you. do you know how many people i casually told because i thought it was normal, i thought that that was love. i thought you and i was love. i slit my wrist in seventh grade. that was the first time. i can't tell you when the last time is because it hasn't happened yet. i haven't stopped. four years i battled depression. but the depression wouldn't have exsisted if it wasn't for you. so thank you. thank you for giving me the hardest thing anyone could ever give me. it's kinda funny because i remeber leaving the court house and i walked passed your family and your family just all looked at me like it was my fault. like i was fucked? because what a girl goes up and says the truth? mase you and i both know the truth all i ever wanted you to do was to say "yes it happened" because from now on,
i'm still gunna wonder if i'm a crazy person. for months at a time i would ask myself am i making this up? because no one else seemed to believe me. i told my mom that you had touched me and she told my dad and my dad was gunna go beat you up and my mom calmed him down. so what? they didn't care. you didn't care. right now i'm in a bath, lights out. music loud. i could push my head so far under that i could drown. no one would miss me. but that'd let you win. and i know that i have much more to live for. but if you had told me that i'd want to live 3 years ago i would bitch slap you. i stood in front of the mirror and i put a belt around my neck watching my head turn purple and then mom called me for dinner and i had to go. i still have the hockey sticks you used. i still have the roller blades your sister gave me. the nerf guns you gave me? they're at goodwill waiting for the next victim to receive them. my heart? i have no idea where it is. lost. i spent time thinking about you, and that was a mistake because you're not worth a thought. you're not worth a breath. i hope you can get better. don't talk to me don't look at me. just be honest. and love yourself and promise me you will never ever do such a thing ever again.. god let it happen to me because he knew i could handle it. he knew i would make it. but that doesn't make it right. mase my heart aches night after night. alarm sounds repeated 10 times this morning i couldn't get up because i realized you had won. but by me saying you won, you really did. so i won't say it ever again, instead i'll say that i won. because hell i did. you gave me the hardest thing that i think no child should ever endear. but i survived it. i did. so tonight right now.. i'm not letting this get to me. tomorrow is tomorrow. but right now i'm saying goodbye to you. it's the hardest goodbye i've ever said because for years you where my constant fear, constant thought. have a good one. i hope life gets better for you. goodbye, mase. goodbye.
#suicide#kms#selfharm#self harm#goodbye#emotional#emotions#rape#molestation#man#sad#teenage#lifestyle#life#positivity#positive#story#storytime#depression#depressing thoughts#depressing things#summer#touch me#touch#strong#stronger
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