#writing divine powered dumbasses

[starglitterz]

♡ NEED TO KNOW.

pretty boys without a shirt… that's it that's the post

✧ feat ; cyno, scaramouche, tighnari, xiao x gn!reader

✧ warning(s) ; suggestive, may be ooc

✧ a/n ; apologies for being a slut on main, it will happen again. hope you like this ! unrelated but i listened to the instrumental for baby by madison beer the entire time i was writing this so here's the link if you'd like to hear it while reading :>

please reblog + leave comments ! it helps a lot :)

✦ CYNO. [ judicator of secrets ]

general mahamatra is renowned for never slacking off, and his unexpected arrival at the doorsteps of scholars often bodes ill for the researchers in question. but that has never been the case for you, his lover, who has come to look forward to his surprise visits.

“i should get back to work, you know,” cyno murmurs against your lips, though the way his strong arms are holding your hips tightly in place on his lap seems to convey quite the opposite. “shouldn’t i be the one saying that?” you smile, threading your hands through his messy mane of white hair, “after all, you were the one who came here under the guise of a medical check-up.” he makes a noise of dissent, nuzzling into your neck where he proceeds to press a storm of kisses, “it wasn’t a disguise, it’s true!” “oh, is that so?” you can’t help but laugh, “what were your symptoms?” cyno pulls away from your skin, where you’re certain he’s left more thtan a few bruises, and gives you the stupidest grin ever, “i was lovesick!” you snort, and he beams, “that was a good one, wasn’t it?” “shut up and just kiss me, dumbass,” you flick his forehead, “your kisses are better than your jokes.” “low blow,” he whines, and you’re struck by his duality between the persona he displays to the world and how he behaves in private. “but it is a wish i’m willing to indulge,” he continues, tilting your chin up to him.

your hands travel up his torso, and you can feel him stiffen under your touch, reclining to give you more access to him. “imagine if someone walked in,” he laughs, though it’s a breathless laugh as you trace circles across his skin, “general mahamatra and the chief healer fooling around like teenagers.” “no, i’ll let them know this is just routine,” you wink, “like how i’m checking your pulse right now.” without warning, you lean down and press your ear against his chest as if to hear his heartbeat directly. cyno freezes and you smile, lifting one hand to caress his face, “i can feel your heart getting faster and faster.” he sighs, trying to regain his composure to the best of his ability, “guess you’re leading me to an early grave.” “oh dear, that’s a shame,” you pretend to be sad, “i think you'll have to extend your stay here so i can fix that.” “ah, a shame indeed,” cyno’s red eyes laser in on yours, and you find yourself amazed at the intensity of his stare, “i’ll be entirely in your care.” “perhaps i might even cure your lovesickness,” you tease, and he smirks before tugging you closer for another kiss, “we’ll see about that.”

✦ SCARAMOUCHE. [ kunikuzushi ]

scaramouche is electric. 

not just because of the electro delusion he wields so effortlessly, but more so because of the way the very air around him crackles with potential and power. perhaps it is because he was sculpted by divinity itself that his fingertips tingle with the electricity coursing through his veins, and gives him this voltaic aura which shines through even when he is doing the most mundane of tasks. 

right now is no exception as he gazes at his reflection - he still looks so pretty. “you really did a number on me,” scaramouche groans, though you can hear the tinge of pride in his voice as he looks at the messy constellation of lovebites strewn across his neck and collarbone. you stroll up behind him after clambering out of bed, stepping over the discarded clothes from last night and letting your arms snake around his waist, “aw, i’m sorry.” “you don’t sound apologetic in the slightest,” scaramouche scoffs, even as his hand envelops yours with warmth. “yeah, that was a lie,” you smirk, leaning closer to whisper in his ear, “i’m not sorry at all.” “that sounds more like you,” he chuckles, though his breath hitches when your palm splays across his abdomen.

scaramouche is always wound tight like a coiled spring, always on edge, always ready to attack at the first sign of danger. and with you around to push his buttons in more ways than one, he swears he’s learned to tense up the second you touch his skin - it sets him aflame. his indigo irises stray to the sight of the two of you in the mirror, and he swallows because he knows you’ve got him wrapped around your little finger. “you’re so cute, i love you,” you giggle, pressing featherlight kisses in a trail along his bare shoulder. “shut up,” his face feels far hotter than it should at your easy compliments which never seem to make sense; who else would have the audacity to call the balladeer ‘cute’? but maybe that’s precisely the reason why he adores you, and he mumbles, “i love you too.” “love me enough to skip your meeting today?” “nope.” “it was worth a shot.”

✦ TIGHNARI. [ verdant strider ]

it is rare for tighnari to spend the night at home thanks to his duties as chief forest watcher, but tonight he has, and you’re planning to make the most of it.

your hands skate over your lover’s skin, pressing down in all the right areas to help massage the tension out of his aching muscles. he isn’t as broadly built as some of the other forest rangers, but he has his own strengths hidden underneath the many layers he wears daily. in fact, you can practically feel his muscles rippling under your touch right now.

“i think you’re overworking yourself, darling,” you say, continuing your work as the scent of harra fruit oil fills the air. it’s a late cloudy night, and the only light outside comes from the distant lamps illuminating avidya forest. he’s silent, quieter than usual, and you’re worried that you’ve overstepped his boundaries. but then his ears twitch and he looks at you, “what?” a teasing smile curves your lips as you realise what just happened - tighnari was so happy about you massaging him that he totally spaced out. he recognises your trademark smirk and sighs, “don’t even think about it.” “c’mon, you have to admit it’s funny when your ears are so big but you still didn’t hear!” you giggle, and he turns away without answering, jutting his lower lip out in a pout. 

“nooo, wait, i’m sorry,” you can’t help the note of amusement that slips into your tone, so you shuffle closer from how you’re sitting on your knees to wrap your arms around his bare torso. resting your chin on his shoulder, you blow on his ear, “tighnari~” his expression doesn’t change, but his ears and tail give him away this time, so you laugh, tilting his chin to face you before surprising him with a kiss, “that means i’m super duper sorry.” “hmph,” tighnari pretends to glare at you for a second before his eyes soften and he smiles, “you’re going to need to give me a lot more kisses before i leave again tomorrow for me to forgive you.” “you don’t need to ask me twice, and i’ll add in a bonus massage for your ears too!” “just admit you want to touch my ears.” “alright fine, that may have been my ulterior motive but i swear it’s also because i love you.” “i know, love, i know.”

✦ XIAO. [ vigilant yaksha ]

adepti do not require sleep to function normally, and right now xiao is so incredibly thankful for that fact because with how you’re acting, there’s no way either of you are getting any sleep tonight. 

your fingertips skirt across the plane of his back, etching every dip and curve of his body into your memory, doodling absent patterns and swirls on his skin and leaving a trail of heat in your wake. it’s been a few minutes of this, and xiao doesn’t think he can take it for much longer. “i know you’re awake, xiao,” you move closer, nuzzling into his back and making a shiver run down his spine. he hums in reply before turning around to face you, amber irises boring into yours with the affectionate gaze he reserves for you and you alone. your eyes widen slightly when you see his face, and he raises an eyebrow, “what is it?” “nothing… you’re just so pretty,” your voice drops to a whisper, treating this moment like something sacred as if it would be blasphemous to speak even a decibel louder.

“what?” xiao has never even imagined that anybody would call him, a celestial being who’s convinced himself he is worth nothing except as a weapon for bloodshed, ‘pretty’. but coming from you, it sounds just right, especially when you cup his cheek, thumb caressing his skin softly. your other hand tangles in the jade streaks of his hair before slipping down to his stomach, tracing a thin line up his torso. xiao is made of lean muscle that freezes under your touch, and you can feel the strength he possesses thumping like a heartbeat under his skin as you trace the emerald tattoo on his bicep.

“i’m serious!” you laugh, and the sound makes xiao so happy his heart threatens to burst out of his chest. weaving your arms around his neck, you tug him impossibly closer, pressing your lips to his before pulling away with a smile, “love you.” “love you too,” xiao manages to reply even though his head is spinning and his cheeks are on fire, but the only thing he can focus on is asking, “can i kiss you again?” “as many times as you want, pretty boy.”

stop wtf why are they so hot... i need them NOW. // general masterlist

© starglitterz 2022. do not repost or modify in any way.

#✏️ — quill writes ! #genshin impact x reader #cyno x reader #tighnari x reader #xiao x reader #scaramouche x reader #genshin x reader #cyno genshin impact #cyno fluff #tighnari fluff #tighnari genshin #xiao fluff #xiao scenarios #scaramouche fluff #scaramouche genshin impact #cw suggestive

[tabibitto]

Hey sweets<3 can I request hcs of Beidou (and Arlecchino if you write for her) finding out her s/o is the lost Princess of Khaenri'ah?

Hey Darling <3 Such a unique request I hadn’t expected myself to write about two of my favorite lesbians (fanon) yet BUT thank you for bringing me the opportunity to. I hope you like it :)

[ request ]

m.list

Ship: Beidou x Feminine Reader, Arlecchino x Fem Reader

CW: angst, comfort, fluff, mentions of death, slight Yandere in Arlecchino's

Notes: Dude ngl my dumbass misread and thought it said oneshots not hcs and i was balls deep into a story when i went back up and was like welp. Shit. LMAODNEKENE

Beidou:

Although the Captain of the Crux Fleet is one of the most accepting and understanding people you know, telling her was giving you so much fucking anxiety

You’d lied to her about your origins, contradicting your promise to be Honest to her

You loved the cute nicknames she had for you, but you couldn’t stand being called her princess anymore with all the conflicting feelings in your heart, plaguing your mind when she used it at night

The time of day that allowed your mind to wander too far from your sanity

It wasn’t a surprise, but a huge weight off your shoulders when you told her your past

Crumbling to the ground of your shared bedroom as she followed suit, cradling your sobbing form in her arms as you babbled incoherently about your trauma

How you were meant to protect your people as Beidou did hers, yet could do nothing but see everyone and everything you knew burn to the ground

you were powerless against the divine holiness of Gods

And you hated yourself every day for it

Constant reminders of your responsibilities as Monarch, the random surges and lust for power and righteousness when you gave orders

Anything from how to deck the ship or the pirate’s positions on the battlefield. You felt that power, it made you feel good. For that short moment you were the Princess of Khaenri’ah, rightful heir to the Khaenri’ahn Throne. Rightful queen of the godless humans and protector of your realm

Yet looking around you..

Ah, right, you were any other person now. Simple and common as the people you protected

Once, at least

Beidou listened to every word, and when you were done, wiping tears away to look at her carefully, you could see the sadness and tears in her own eyes

She understood you, she felt your pain and it made you cry more

From that day forward, she was more gentle and patient with you when out and about in Liyue or Inazuma

Beidou paid more attention and realized the way you looked longingly and sadly from a high point on land downwards into civilization and realized you were reminiscing

And you were eternally grateful to her for all the times she brought you back to the here and now, with her. Not the fire and blood of 500 years ago to a people you could only remember, and nothing more.

She would make your days special and happy, nothing had to be grandiose or fancy, simple things like giving you a massage, breakfast in bed etc

She always did, though the captain made an effort to show you how smitten she was every chance she got

Because unknowingly, that night as she held you protectively as if you would too burn away, she made a promise

That she would do everything in her power to ensure you wouldn’t loose her, and the people you loved

She would protect your kin and take extra precautions when on land

Beidou could not handle to see you so destroyed

She wouldn’t allow it. It would be too much for you

So for as long as you gave her with your heart, she would nurture it until one day she would be too old in comparison to your eternally cursed, young and unwithering complexion to take care of you

Arlecchino:

You were number 2 of the Fatui Harbingers. Quite a High rank, and somehow higher then that of The Knave.

Even when you two began dating, you hadn’t revealed to her why

She, by strength believed to be stronger then you and depending on who you asked, would tell you who was more cunning

The only person who knew of your origins was Her Majesty The Tsarista and Pierro, Number 1 of the Harbingers

It wasn't like you had to tell Pierro, he just kind of already knew

How could The Jester forget the Harlequin who ruined his original plans for Khaenri'ah

Who he had blamed on bad days for the destruction of his nation

You only silently took his anger, you understood it

But Pierro Also knew that you only had so much say in political power

This unspoken beef between the old man and her girlfriend was... unfathomable to her

I mean sure she was not one to like him to begin with but to witness firsthand his distaste for you was...fucking weird

Weather it be lack of skill in digging into your past or because she didn't have the balls to do that to one human she cared about you would never know

Arlecchino decided to put it aside and ignore it, you hadn't told her the truth because ain't no fucking way Pierro just has a bone to pick with the Harbinger a rank below his for no reason

In all Honesty, sometimes she wishes she never found out

It didn't make her love you any less

But it made her weaker

A word that hadn't been in her vocabulary since her joining of the Fatui

She was known and disliked by Childe to have no permanent loyalty to anyone. Her promises and honesty wavered towards whoever benefited her more

Yet when it came to you, she would be the one to act a clown to make you happy, and keep you safe

So when You pulled Arlecchino aside one day after an argument with Pierro who was across the coffin of your fallen friend, La Signora, the fair lady

Arlecchino could not stand it and demanded you he honest with her

To which you responded, more like screamed for her to get out of the cathedral. Though your face was hidden from the rest, she saw your look that meant for her to go somewhere else in order to get her answers

You spoke quietly but with determination

"I am The Lost Princess of Khaenri'ah. I was first in line to my family's throne. I both failed in my duty as monarch and protector of my nation."

She stared at you with wide eyes, her hands curling into tight fists.

"Pierro dislikes me because he believes it is my fault for the loss of our people, i won't blame him. But he too, did not succeed in convincing my father to change the order of things in order to survive. He can't blame me for everything. If I, his daughter and first heir got neglected what did HE think he was gonna do?!" You yelled angrily

Taking a deep breath you apologized and Arlecchino pulled you close after ensuring no one could see you

Oh yeah, your fruity relationship was a secret

not because of homophobia, the fatui could care less who was the Fuckee of choice was to Arlecchino

She just knew that someone would pull some dumb shit in order to either piss her off or for personal gain

The only collective thing anyone in this damn group agreed on was disliking The Balladeer, besides that it was a free for all deal

which meant someone here could harm you to gain acess to Arlecchino's secrets and weaknesses and have no repercussion

a curse and a blessing as a result of absolute authority from the Tsarista to The Fatui

From then on and like never before, Arlecchino would make sure you would not be in danger

Like ever

She held your hands more tightly when you walked down the hall or in public

The Knave pulled your hood closer to your cold-bitten pink cheeks to disguise your beauty

Arlecchino was more on the defensive side when Pierro even dared to look at you the wrong way

You were untouchable and precious

only for her to have and love

Her pretty princess, her only true queen as much as she would have to say otherwise in the presence of the Cryo Archon

You were hers and she was yours

Everyone and everything else could burn to the ground

A thousand more nations could be smothered into dust and Arlecchino would not care as long as you were by her side

and no matter which you were promised to, she would whisper in your ear sweet reassurences that it wasn't your fault. Nor your intention

weather you were the sweet and caring type or as cunning and ruthless as her, she looked at you with a set of wings and a halo upon your pretty head

Hypocritical yes

But as long as your smile warmed her cold days and your safety was most ensured

The world itself could burn down, she held her own in the palm of her hands each night she held your face to her own

As long as her world was safe, nothing else mattered

No one else mattered

#genshin fic #genshin impact fanfic #genshin impact #genshin x y/n #beidou #Beidou fluff #genshin angst with comfort #genshin impact angst #genshin impact comfort #arlecchino #arlechinno x reader #beidou x reader #lesbian #gay #pierro #fatui harbingers #fatui headcanons #beidou hcs #arlecchino headcannons #beidou angst

[poptart-productions]

the moment

[a complete list of the moments eren fell deeper]

↳ ❝ [pairing] ¡! ❞

canon! eren x modern black fem! reader

series masterlist | next

——————————✩———————————

SEASON ONE

the battle at trost, most definitely. like you’re being super jittery , and then you and eren have a cute moment where he’s teaching you how to use your gear—bc nobody’s died yet and he’s in high-ish spirits—and like you’re competent ; you wouldn’t have passed the training if you weren’t , you were just nervous so he’s being “supportive”

like this dude would probably push you off the building so you would be forced into fighting—and then you discover that you’re actually pretty good at it

“eren!” he’s the first one you call to as you stand, still zipping above you, “my first kill!” you nod in the direction of the subjugated titan on the ground below.

“you’re doing it!” he lands beside you, “but stay frosty,” his smile fades, “we’re not done yet!”

“never will be!” you quip, your expression matching his, ( his heart squeezed when you looked at him like that ; dumbass probably wrote it off as ‘nerves’ ) and you ditch your dulled blades.

you turn to him, “let’s go!”

so yes , you guys were fighting titans together , looking like a real power couple

you try your best to keep everyone alive, but once things become unpredictable, you start to lose it and you can’t get it together

eventually—and honestly, at no complete fault of your own, the “randoms” ( i am so not sorry ) eventually end up dying, as they did in the episode

“we’re gonna fall back.” you sigh

“what?”

armin blinked, “but the higher ups said—“

“—what would they say if they knew there were three of us left?”

“there’s an outpost toward the. . .” you picture a compass in your mind, “. . .west.”

“there, we can refill our tanks” you turn your back to the two

“if we meet up with another group. . .maybe we can tag-along with whoever is there but if it were up to me, we’d be retreating” you don’t wait for a response before heading off in that direction, knew they would be following

( eren hates when people on his level boss him around, but as someone who writes my readers to be anxiety prone , he’d probably see you as passive—so seeing you like this was kind of. . .attractive? )

you hear armin and eren behind you, and you turn to ensure that it was in fact them.

by the time you turned back, an abnormal had come out of absolutely nowhere.

you shoot your anchors down, and slam into the roof, narrowly avoiding getting swallowed whole.

unfortunately, you end up tumbling down the side and into an alleyway.

“[y/n]!” armin called after you, giving chase and leaving eren behind.

he grit his teeth, “dammit!”

eren. . .well he goes berserk. and that’s when he gets his dumbass eaten

when he comes back as the attack titan—like you know it’s him , but his eyes were a dead giveaway. he was driven by instinct and you can see that.

then when you’re talking on the roof after pyxis bails you guys out , and eren isn’t the most verbal person , so he’ll probably just pat your head or something when he notices that you’re anxious

it worked , by the way.

SEASON TWO

there’s so many here oml ; okay so when he took back the wall and you were the first face he saw when he tore himself from the nape

“you did it, eren!” you look down at him with warm eyes, the dying light illuminating your skin.

on the brink of unconsciousness, he looked up at you, blinking slowly; his lips parted as he tried to say something.

his eyes trailed down to your lips, “you must be tired right?”

“rest. . .i’ll be here when you wake up”

ngl he was probably whipped atp, because how can he not be—when you looked like a literally goddess in that moment—like you know you were glowing because that golden hour lighting is ✨divine ✨on brown skin

and then when eren gets “arrested” and put on trial , he did actually shut up when he saw your face in the jury/audience

then the female titan appears; you probably weren’t with him , but did most likely follow mikasa to retrieve him with her and levi.

at which point , eren wakes up to find you and mikasa , but what made him smile was seeing that you had taking off your cloak for mikasa to use as blanket , and let her lay down on your lap while you took the uncomfortable seated position

“[y/n]?” he called to you; he almost thought you were awake from your seated position

when you didn’t respond, he noticed your closed eyes and the gentle rise and fall of your body.

jade eyes scanned your form, gentle fingers resting in the sea of ink that is mikasa’s hair

lips slightly parted, your hair was freshly washed and braided; evidence of your boredom while waiting for him to wake up—your face stained with tears from the devastating loss you suffered and yet,

you were so beautiful.

dumbass is still like “yeah she’s just one of the people i grew up with , that’s it—yep, stops there”

this happened earlier in the season/the end of season 1 but i forgot to put it until now , so the graduation ceremony and the “initiation” into the scouts

it’s a triumphant moment , but most of 104th regiment are terrified out of their mind

and so are you. . .

“you should’ve went to the garrison regiment if you were going to cry” he raised a brow at you

knowing that pretty much everyone in the show shits on the garrison, you took personal offense to that.

you snapped your head in his direction, body still stuck in the ‘salute’ position, “i’m not crying”

“i’m staying because want to be with you guys”

he blamed the humid night and hot uniform for the red in his face.

so when y’all went up into the mountains , and while you’re trying to enjoy everything , but you know reiner , bertholdt , and ymir’s betrayal is imminent.

unfortunately , you’d actually grown to care about those three—and you see them in a sympathetic light after knowing all of what they’ve been through—but you felt like shit.

you knew there was nothing you could do—not even mikasa could stop the two from kidnapping eren.

you snuck away to be alone with your thoughts, sitting down on an old dead tree. you sighed; you looked tired, resting your face in your hands

“[y/n].” he called to you, and you didn’t turn back—you knew it was him. he sat down next to you, and you guys were silent for like ten minutes

again , eren isn’t the most verbally affectionate person , so he’ll just kinda coax you into laying against his shoulder until he finally works up the nerve to ask you what was wrong

“[y/n], what—“

but he got interrupted when mikasa and armin finally found the two of you

inevitably , eren got kidnapped , but you and mikasa were on timing—and thanks to your knowledge of the episode , you lead the brigade to their exact location.

you also kept mikasa from getting her ribs crushed , which set off a chain reaction of things that didn’t happen

eren still discovered that he held the coordinate , though ; also thanks to you

“wait!” you stop mikasa from going for the kill, “eren has to be the one do it!” you gestured toward him

the way you looked at him , like you understood just how much it was true : it did have to be him

he was alone—rendered useless—feeling useless , and then you were there , looking at him with pure trust as you untied him from his bonds

“you can do it, eren” your eyes told him,

you single-handedly gave him the will to live in that moment and finally he started to realize how he felt.

now this is where reader and eren switch places in terms of being oblivious ; like you see how he acts around you but are in denial because you’re like “he likes mikasa—sure the confession scene didn’t happen , but that’s because mikasa wasn’t about to die—their feelings for each are the same as they were in the show”

sigh

SEASON THREE

there’s not really too much here , considering not a lot of the season until the end focuses on eren.

you two return from eren’s basement, an uncomfortable and painful distance wedged between you by the weight of eren’s presence—the youthful and determined glow to his eyes had faded due to the revelations he faced.

but while he was brewing on everything during the beach trip, his feelings for you became crystal clear , shining brightly in front of all his other thoughts.

SEASON FOUR

season four eren is not here to bullshit , so he’d have realized that he is in love with you by the time the scouts make it across the sea

he’s in the middle of pretending to listen to the others complain about sea sickness when he sees you, leaning against the railing silently watching the sea

you’d been through hell and back and had the weight of the world on your shoulders at this point so you were brewing on things just as much as eren was.

“hey.” he greeted dryly as he joined you, “hey.” you said, just as dry.

“what are you doing alone?”

“just reminiscing—“ your expression was blank but your mind was racing

back when you were a kid—when attack on titan was just a show, getting here seemed so simple—but now you’ve seen the toll war takes on someone.

you were just sixteen—you all were, it wasn’t fair—you’ve sacrificed so many of your friends—so many relationships for this.

if anyone deserved to be here, it’s not you.

“it’s not your fault.”

you blinked, turning to look at him—for a moment he looked like his old self as he stared at the horizon

“all the ones we’ve lost. . .those that have betrayed us. . .”

“. . .that’s not your burden to bear.”

you leaned against eren’s shoulder, crying quietly beside him

yes that moment right there is what gave him hope—well that and his knowledge of this timeline , along with others.

he’ll get you alone and give you the opportunity to confess.

if you fuck it up like mikasa did , well. . .

let’s get ready to rumble

#nonblacks dni #black reader #anime #fanfic #attack on titan #attack on titan eren #eren x black reader #eren x black y/n #eren x reader #eren jaeger #eren yeager

[henrike-does-writing-sometimes]

The Divine, In which five boys have to navigate their daily lives while wielding divine power.

Current Stage - Writing as I please

Genre - Magical Boy | Superheros

Setting - Coastal town somewhere in the world

Synopsis - Human legend tells of five mystical warriors, chosen to wield the powers of light and darkness in order to protect the worlds from danger. No one knows where they come from, who they are, or where they go when all is said and done. 60 years have passed since they were last seen, and people are once more wondering if they’re real or simply a legend.

That is, until one day, strange monsters appear across the worlds, and the mystical warriors are born anew.  

And so, it is now up to five boys to keep the worlds safe from monsters, cultists, and an approaching deity of chaos. All the while dealing with the everyday struggles of being a teenager. 

Piece of cake, right?

Main Characters -

Rei Yamada, The Divine Sun : Dorky videogame nerd who did not ask for this. While he’s not good in social situations and prefers to keep to himself, he is great at strategizing, especially with his quick thinking and fast reflexes. He’s observant, sentimental, and clever. Andie Calinao-Fox, The Divine Twilight : Your number one hype-man. Does everything with good intentions, though isn’t always aware of people’s boundaries, nor their own. They’re supportive, enthusiastic, outgoing, and always happy to lend a listening ear. Timothy Murphy, The Divine Moon : Mysterious and stoic, or rather introverted and sleep-deprived. May appear judgemental and a little mean, but has a massive heart for friends, literature, and all things horrific. He’s witty, attentive, and protective. Nico Morales, The Divine Aurora : Dumbass sweetheart, and perhaps a bit of a stoner. With a polite and comforting demeanor, it’s easy to miss out on his constant state of stress and anxiety. Similarly, it’s easy to forget he’s a powerhouse. He’s helpful, generous, and hard-working.  Mike Chandler, The Divine Arcadia : Oldest in the group and takes that very seriously. Manages to somehow be both really smart and really dumb at the same time. Lives for the arts and never leaves the house without his sketchbook. He’s patient, reliable, and compassionate.

Themes - Found Family | Chosen one | Mental Health | Morality | Divinity | Humanity | Friendship | Light and Darkness | Self-worth | Brotherhood

Warnings - Violence | Cults | Kidnapping | Body Horror | Abuse | More May Be Added

What I Got To Offer ? Angst ! Trauma ! The good stuff ! Diverse cast (LGBTQ+, ethnicity, etc.), cool villains with distinct motives, dudes having magical transformation sequences, magical sidekicks (who may or may not last very long), endless shenanigans

Tags - wip : The Divine

: Taglist - @vacantgodling :

Let me know if you want to be added/removed !

#felt like it was about time I properly introduced this bad boy #writeblr #wip #wip introduction #writers on tumblr #magical boy #mahou shounen #wip : The Divine

[beevean]

@akumahoshojo

Fair enough that this could have happened. But the writing relies on this off-screen trick way too often, and it's seriously distracting.

One bad moment in S3E2 comes to mind. Carmilla returns to Styria with Hector in tow, and she starts to discuss about making him forge demons for them. Morana then procedes to explain to us viewers that she was a total dumbass, which I agree, but...

“[Hector] was quite pliable once. And then, you got him to betray his master, made him see all his goals destroyed, beat the shit out of him, and dragged him eight hundred miles on the ends of a rope.” 

Morana. You’ve literally been on screen for five minutes.

How do you know all of this.

She wasn’t even there to welcome Carmilla back outside! The only vampire, in fact! She has never seen Hector on screen! But even if, let’s assume that she did see Hector when he was put in a cell... HOW DO YOU KNOW ABOUT CARMILLA’S MANIPULATIONS??? HIS GOALS?????? Did Carmilla tell you all of this beforehand? Did she know before reaching Wallachia that 1) Dracula had two Forgemasters, and 2) one of them was a complete moron, and therefore she could “destroy his goals”, whatever goals Hector had? Morana also has been established to not give a single shit about humans like the rest of the vampires, so her speech comes off as weird, as if she’s sympathizing with Hector - imagine talking about the goals of a pig, and that’s what Morana is doing from a vampire’s POV.

I can’t accept this! This is contrived on such an amateurish way! This is literally Ellis stuffing words into a random character to show that yes, we were supposed to find Carmilla’s beatdown a stupid decision, oh so she has a flaw, deep writing right there. But no. Morana shouldn’t know all of this. This is forced. So, on the opposite side, it makes the beatdown scene look even more pointless.

And I checked the wiki: she has no divination powers.

Am I stupid? Maybe I’m stupid. Maybe I missed some vital scene that showed that Morana was informed of every single detail of what Carmilla did in S2. I feel like I’m made fun of.

And, going back to the original topic, this is why I have a hard time forgiving Alucard being a bitch to Trevor for things we didn’t see him do.

#castlevania #anti netflixvania #this show is praised for its writing

[calcified-panglin]

I'll admit, it's on me for not cross-referencing or verifying posts on my end before sneezing them at you. Being noob at this site I figured other users were more "in the know" than I was.

I was wrong.

And so was everyone else.

But more importantly, I was wrong in the same way everyone else was. Which was very. And that bothers me because I am in no small part contributing to the wrongness of it all. Fool me twice, shame on me, you know?

Fortunately I lack the divine power to punish all of mankind at once for their ignorance via instantaneous combustion, so I'll settle for fixing this the old fashioned way by making myself less stupid than I was before.

Save for obvious shitposts or conjecture labelled as such, I will do my due-diligence in ensuring that most if not everything on here has a credible source behind it. This might come in the form of an adendum or footnotes at the bottom of posts I make or additions to things I reblog here that deserve visible citations. Something like this:

Source(s): Me, Myself, I, et al., "My self-actualisation and realisation that I do not have or want to be stupid", [link directly into brain], Spetember 16th 2023

Yes, it's loosely Harvard-style. No, I will not be consistent with it. Maybe, it will be changed as I go.

I might get excited and talk about something before hitting the books but will be sure to come back with something to prove or disprove whatever it was I was talking about - even if it means talking to people and asking them if they have any leads. Like a meat person.

That last point's important actually, because clear and good-faith communication helps heaps.

If ever you catch me or anyone else saying things without a source, run it by the records and make sure it tracks. Ask OP if they have any further information to share or go investigate it yourself. Most importantly, don't do what I did and lower your standards because you think you're a total dumbass. However true that is aside, the neat thing about not knowing a thing is that there's just that much more to learn if you take the time to do so. "Write what you know" - whether in storytelling or academia - isn't a rigid rule because you can always know more than you used to!

Point being, if you can't hold humanity to the lofty standard of "knows what they're talking about", then the next best thing is meeting that standard yourself.

#helgi's bone stash

[xiaogenshinmybeloved]

I can't believe i found this fluff and crack SAGAU gem beneath all this trauma and angst😭💞 literally we stan dumbass darling in this house hold. Since many SAGAU fics characters are all about the archons, traveler, albedo, and kaeya, etc. How about the mondststadt girls interact with their grace???

Like imagine everyone thinking "goodness, our god is here, are they trying to tell us something? Have we done something wrong?" from afar, but it's just darling asking amber to summon baron bunny so they can dance together💃🕺

Darling simping on jean, rosaria, eula, and lisa. "Hey lisa, can you say those line again?" "Naughty boys who don't do what they're told needs a- your grace are you sure??"

"😳👉👈💕"

Jean trying to catch up their grace's chaoticness "your grace! Where are you going?!?!" "Trying to find klee so we can make bombs together :D!" "I'M SORRY, WHAT?!"

Overall dumbass darling being a second hand embarrassment but representing all of the genshin impact community that's always wanted to do😩👌✨

My first anon! Hello there!

No worries, this AU will stay as crack and fluff only I am physically incapable of writing angst on purpose, I would make myself cry only. If I do write it on accident then angst grabbed the plot and ran off with it but, generally unless requested you probably won’t see angst here. Only good vibes~

Thank you this is exactly the vibe I wanted dumbass darling to have hahaha. No thoughts head empty but boy do they love everyone! And they’ll shower everyone in love!

You want Mondstadt girls you’re getting Mondstadt girls chapter three was supposed to be someone else but now I want to write Lisa everyone say thank you to this anon!

Already have some plans for Jean, and I think I might be able to add Eula in too if I try

But, if you want me to write separate small stories for the girls, feel free to send another anon, I'll happily oblige!

As for Rosaria… enjoy this small drabble

“Oh, hello sister Rosaria! Nice to meet you!”, you waved at her eagerly from your seat in Angel’s share. Hearing the invitation in your voice, she sat down on the free chair next to you, other one occupied by Kaeya.

“Right… Your grace.”, the title felt weird to speak out. Rosaria has never held much faith in the divine, but she had felt your power and influence herself, and how it allowed her to grow stronger. You really were something different from a human, something above them all. Still… It should be fine if she tries teasing you a little, wouldn’t it? See if she can figure out your motives.

“So, I’ve heard the first time you saw Kaeya you complimented his boobs?”, you just tilted your head at her tho, apparently not noticing Kaeya choking on his drink behind you, and then smiled wide at her.

“Yeah! Why, are you jealous? Don’t worry, yours are also very nice. :D

Ah, Rosaria! Your hand! You broke your glass are you okay?? Are you bleeding?? D:

Kaeya, help! Wait, why are you laughing? Did I say something??”

#Astra's answers tag #genshin cult au #self aware genshin #so in conclusion #girls..... #good shit that good shit #I have no idea how I'll write Lisa yet but #that's a problem for future me #present me wants to try on her hat #Astra's writing tag

[hotdamnhunnam]

Hey lovie! Sorry I’m a bit late but could I request something for your 2k celebration (congrats again!💛)

Could I request a Jax Teller story with these emojis

🌧👅⛺️

I look forward to seeing what story you write based off of these emojis! 💛

Thanks for your request for my Emoji Fic Fest! And thanks for the congrats! 💗

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Bitch a Tent

Pairing: Jax Teller x F!Reader Warnings: smut, swearing, sex in the great outdoors, while it rains and pours Word Count: ~1k Emoji Prompt: 🌧👅⛺️ (key words are in bold)

“Fuck this shit!”

Jax Teller’s first ever attempt to pitch a tent just isn’t going very well. He’s never been camping before and you can tell. Ten minutes in and he’s fed up with it. Fuming and furious as hell. Throwing the bitchiest bitch fit.

It doesn’t help now that the weather fucking sucks. It’s rotten luck. One of those days when even though the sun shines bright, a random shower just attacks from out of nowhere which is really not alright. Totally fucked. The rain has paused for now but both of you are soaked. You’re not complaining since your man looks so damn good all dripping wet it makes you choke.

Droplets are trickling from his beard as damp gold tresses frame his face… his shirt is matted to his skin and perfectly accentuates the contours of his muscles in a way that makes your dirty little heart hammer and race…

You struggle not to let your thirsty thoughts distract you as you see him hopelessly shoving a tent pole in the totally wrong place.

“Jax, stop!” you laugh, watching him grappling with the pole so angrily he’s close to breaking it in half. Stuck in a battle with this bendy piece of metal and determined to come out on fucking top. You take it in your own grip firm and tight. Wishing instead that you were grasping at his shaft. “Hold up, you’re not sticking it in right…”

He flashes you his signature smug smirk, because he’s such a fucking jerk. “That isn’t what you said last night.”

You roll your eyes and stick your tongue out at him like a bratty little child. Wishing instead that you could wrap that slutty tongue around his big fat dick and drive him fucking wild.

Jax chuckles, looking on and licking his lips as you expertly drive in this stubborn rod where it belongs, grasp hard and strong, tight and white-knuckled. “Lookatchu working that pole.”

“Just had to lend a hand because my dumbass boyfriend couldn’t stick it in the fucking hole.”

“What if I told you I was screwing up on purpose so that I could watch you do it?”

“Oh, you wouldn’t. I’d call bullshit,” you scoff knowing that he’s full of it. “Your alpha male ego is bruised because your girl can do what you couldn’t, and you’d better fess up to it.”

Of course you know Jax Teller never ever will. But just as you’d intended, he’s offended… so the beast in him is raging now as he’s dripping with rainwater. And he’s never looked hotter. Hot enough to fucking kill.

***************

“I’ll show you how I stick it in the fucking hole.”

Jax loves to literally make you eat your words. He rasps them fierce into the wet gape of your mouth until they pierce into your soul, now as he pounds you on a bed of rain-soaked grass so hard it hurts. He’s just the worst. Gets off on pumping you so full and swallowing you whole. Your pussy pulsates all around his massive girth stretching you out until it feels like you’re about to fucking burst.

The tent that you had started putting up is far from finished. But Jax really couldn’t wait to do his business. He’s been railing you to pieces as the rain showers began, soaking the both of you again, just over these past several minutes.

And now he’s gloating on the power that his godlike cock has over you as he continues splitting your wet pussy open with it. Just the way he loves to plow. The way that only Jax knows how. “That shut you up real good now, didn’t it.”

You need to cum but you already know that he’s forbidden it. The rule that you can only ever reach release when Jax permits it is engraved deep in your core where his divine dominant dick has proudly written it. You’d never dare to disobey after how many times you’ve ridden it.

Although the two of you are clothed, it’s like the rain has stripped you both. The way it soaks makes such a joke of all your clothing. Barriers between your skin and his reduced to fucking nothing. The godly gorgeous man above you is a motherfucking king and looks more powerful than ever with the way the rainfall darkens as it drenches. Everything inside you clenches.

You could just die from this view. You do die as he then leans down to kiss you. Kisses long and hard and slow, pace of his lips such a stark contrast to the fast snap of his hips as his thick shaft slides in and out of your tight cunt until you’re both about to blow.

In the exact second that Jax at last allows you to let go… a bolt of lightning streaks across the sky with its electric glow, and you cum harder than the thunder bound to follow—light and sound moments apart, unlike the two of you who cum undone in sync to the aligned pound of your hearts, your peak and his one and the same as his seed spills explosively and fills you so ferociously while all your juices flow. Just how a man on earth can fuck like this you’ll never really know.

It doesn’t matter though—you’re his and he is yours and thankfully you know exactly how to push all of his buttons. Piss him off so that he’ll fuck your cunt to bits all of a sudden.

When it’s time to pitch a tent Jax Teller turns into a whiny little bitch who fucking can’t. But you sure can, and aren’t afraid to show it even if it makes him feel less of a man. What really matters is that you can always pitch a very big tent in his pants.

Cum rain or shine, Jax Teller’s dick is just divine. To you he is a golden god wielding his fuck-stick like a thunderbolt and goddamn does he love to play that role. He’s got the biggest pole, and always knows exactly how to stick it in the hole.

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Emoji Fic Masterlist

Emoji Fic Tag List – below; if you’d like to be added or removed, just let me know!

@happyhunnams @band--psycho @est11 @edonaspanca @starbooty @innerpaperexpertcloud @i-love-scott-mccall @six-camelot @alexa-rae-dreamz @coffeebooksandfandom @thesuicidalflower @flaireandsynch @helloheyhihowdyheya @gemini0410 @waywardodysseys @zozebo @bettergetusetoit @emilykjh @little-diable @rocketqueen @mrspeacem1nusone @miss-smutty @rayslittlekitten @abby-splace @chubbychubbs28 @miraclesoflove @tegggeeee @hunnambabe @missusnora @kesskirata @vixenrebellion @thexhostess @pomegranatearildreams @kandii395 @severewobblerlightdragon @itspdameronthings @niki-xie @cind-in-real-life @saweetspoiled @poge-life @few-proud-emotonal @samanthaisnthome @melodranas @soaharleys @charlie-hunnams-old-lady @simpmasterjr @nataliewalker93 @lovebarefootblonde @marvelousmermaid @tsukuyomi011 @sciapod @midnight-dreams-23

#jax teller #sons of anarchy #soa #charlie hunnam #jax teller smut #sons of anarchy smut #soa smut #charlie hunnam smut #jax teller imagine #sons of anarchy imagine #soa imagine #charlie hunnam imagine #jax teller fanfiction #sons of anarchy fanfiction #soa fanfiction #charlie hunnam fanfiction #jax teller x reader #jax teller x you #charlie hunnam x reader #charlie hunnam x you #emoji fics

[thefanficmonster]

Hidden Powers

Corpse Husband x Reader (Female)

Warnings: Abuse allegations, Swearing, Mild melancholy

Genre: Humor, SLIGHT Angst, Fluff, RPF (Real Person Fic) - Sorry the genres are all over the place

Summary: A misconception or misunderstanding turned rumor threatens to bring down Corpse’s entire career, but luckily, Y/N knows better than to stand aside and let it happen.

Requested by Anon. Hi darling! Thank you so much for your request and I’m so sorry for the long wait but here it finally is and I hope you enjoy the fic if you happen to come across it. Love, Vy ❤

“Fuck this game!“ Y/N yells out in frustration as she is met with the screen informing her of her failure - aka death - for the fifth time in the past hour. “Has anyone ever even passed night four? I’m sure the king of FNAF Markiplier has but I’m also sure he hasn’t done it one a livestream! And my big mouth really had to go ahead and swear not to end this stream until I pass this God forsaken night, ughhh!“

Typically, Y/N’s quite the fearful rat when playing horror games, especially when home alone like right now, but this FNAF game has gradually turned her into a raging gamer instead. Not raging as in kicking ass at the game but as in the game kicking the ass of her sanity. She’s been struggling with this specific night for a while - the better half of her previous stream and an hour into today’s. Well, seeing how little progress she’s making with each try, it’s gonna be way more than an hour into today’s livestream as well. She’ll be lucky if she manages to get past it before hitting the three hour mark or just rage quitting which she’s bound to do eventually if her gameplay keeps going at this rate.

Another try later, she’s once again jumpscared into a failure screen that’s practically mocking her at this point. Throwing her arms above her head, Y/N sighs heavily, the frustration she’s harboring becoming more and more evident in her body language. “You know what, I need a break. Lemme see what you guys are saying in the chat.”

Scrolling through comments upon comments greeting her, sending her compliments and some trolling her with some hateful remarks she comes across a question which makes her brows furrow. That same question is repeated by a few other people but they fly by so quickly she doesn’t manage to catch the people’s usernames.

“A bruise on my arm? Where?“ She says out loud as she inspects both her arms, looking for what her chat had been talking about. That’s when her eyes eyes land on the purple mark on the skin just above her right elbow. She laughs, “Oh this? I know I’m a clumsy person but Corpse is to blame for this one.“

Little does the girl know, her boyfriend, who’s currently in his own apartment instead of camping out at hers, is watching this very stream, laughing his ass off remembering how that bruise came to be.

His laughter is cut short though when he catches glimpse of Y/N’s chat which suddenly floods with concern from her fans - assumptions and allegations of him being an abusive boyfriend starting to pollute the previously cheerful comment section. His stomach turns, for many reasons, each reason making it tighten in a worse and more painful knot. 

The first blow comes from people actually coming up with such a thing. How could they even allow their minds to wander to such a dark and disgusting place where he’d be even remotely an abuser.

The second blow to his heart is delivered by the fact that people believed it. How and why could people believe such an absurd idea?! How low did these people think of him? What kind of piece of shit did he come off as to some people?

And the third is the mental image the idea gives him. It’s such a fucked up scene, he can’t even conjure it up, he can’t mentally picture it. Hell, he could and would never even raise his voice at Y/N. He’d never dare upset her or hurt her feelings let alone hurt her....like that!

“Whoa, whoa, whoa!“ Y/N’s gasp reaches him as though it was meant to fish him out of the downward spiral he started going down with these overwhelmingly dark thoughts, “What’s with this nonsense some of y’all are spewing in the chat?!“ She sounds downright angry and irritated, ready to fight whoever will continue spreading these rumors about her lovely boyfriend whom she absolutely adores. “Guys, I mean, seriously?! Do you have any idea what you’re talking about and WHO you’re talking about? Do we have the same Corpse in mind here? I doubt we do - you have some villainized, abusive version, and I have the loving boyfriend who tried to teach me how to handle a lightsaber so we can have a lightsaber fight and my dumbass used my own weapon against me. Yeah, I was pretty salty Corpse laughed his heart out while I was cringing in pain, but man, you guys take it farther than the farthest.“ Seeing his sweet, kind and non-confrontational girlfriend who always avoids conflict at all costs turn into this protective lioness because someone is talking shit about him is heartwarming and scary at the same time. “Y’all better shut the hole where these fucked up rumors surfaced from before you get one of the most innocent, loving and caring individuals in hot water for the BS you came up with! Copy? You better.“

Corpse has never in his entire life seen the topic of a stream chat change so quickly, the rumor never once getting brought up again.

That’s some serious power right there - power he never knew Y/N possessed because of her cute and soft exterior. Now he knows what kinda beast of a woman he’s dating - one prepared to do anything to protect him, no matter who from. And damn does that make him feel emotional and loved despite the shit that just happened. She can make him forget all the bad within the blink of an eye - that too is another superpower of hers, but this one he’s known about from the very start.

@maat-the-prescriptive  @simonsbluee  @save-the-sky  @itsminniekat  @hacker-ghost  @bi-andready-tocry  @imtiredaffff  @jazzkaurtheglorious  @hereforbeebo  @fandomgirl17  @chrysanthykios  @maehemscorpyus  @loraleiix  @letsloveimagines  @annshit  @i-cant-choose-a-username-help  @enigmaticmaze  @divine-artemis  @waterlilypat  @idontknowwhatthisisfam  @evi-ka  @classyandfabulous00  @redperson58  @lilysdaydreams @solowheein  @mythicalamphitrite  @axen-gers  @luckygirl144  @nj01  @buddyemily   @the-albino-lioness  @stardream14  @gdhdkfnn  @nomadicgypsyy  @preciousskye  @fluffysuicideunicornsworld  @o-kaelin  @manacharlotte  @awkward-youtube-trash  @lolalee24  @bonky-beerns  @meme-lord-and-savior-sebastian  @strawbrinkofdeath  @teenloves  @tams0527  @browneyespinkhair  @starstruckllamapuppy  @daisychains012  @y0ulooked  @tinytacosuitcaseflap @supernatural-is-my-only-life  @jula-pauline  @melodykitty  @just-that-bi-girl  @crazybutconfidentaf  @lowellshade @alphakees  @bellero  @weallneednamjesus  @starryhanji  @boiled-onionrings  @husherstan  @fockingwhore  @melaningoddessthings  @prettypastelpetals  @haleypearce  @godwhyamiawkward  @y-napotat  @daisychainyoonmin  @little-miss-rebel3  @free-wheelin-bi-sexual  @redmoon261 @darkacademic2  @wiseflamingoqueen  @into-the-end  @namikhai-i  @nastiablr  @thelittleplantlover  @mirktuan  @dont-hyuck @jjk-bunny  @vintagegothlover  @easygoingtheatre  @itsrandombooklover  @miiaivi  @emmybaybee  @befourgolden  @jjk-is-my-shit  @eternalteaaars  @spacebadgerx  @princesslunalight  @acequinn14  @samm48  @misselsbells06 @simp-lykawa  @fo-love  @marishimomura-blog  @therealglenncoco  @cinnamonbun332  @killtherandomness  @sanshinexxxsan  @fee-btheweeb  @press-lay  @cathleenpotgieter16  @jazzydoesstuff  @moonlxghtbay  @forestrain2000  @hyunjinhugs  @blood-of-fandoms  @lovellylies  @ukiyolixx  @simpforhpcharacters  @chrisdylan17  @parkerjisung  @pedernille  @theodonyous  @wineandionysus  @malfoystilinskii05  @morbid-x  @coryisagee  @jessewa26  @scoobydooluver97 @mindintheskies365  @raeanneinwonderland  @indecisive-empanada  @gluttonypalace  @loriane2503  @btsiguess-kpop  @khaoticbunny  @lucidlycactus  @smiithys  @rottenroyalebooks  @kpopgirlbtssvt  @fangirl-tc27  @fr0z3n-1  @notmesimpingfortechno  @shotarosleftpinky  @kunoi-chan  @idk-whats-wrong-with-me  @yikeroonie  @goldenstarofthunderclan  @poetry-and-tea  @ama-do-writing-stuff  @wishbonewolf  @emeraldxhope  @t0xick1tty  @kusuinko  @speakyourselfloveyourself  @sophia902103  @lo-manburg  @classsykittykat  @dmgama  @depressedpuppythatneedscoffee  @btsiguess-kpop  @akaashi-baby  @gun-jong-simp  @geschichtenfee  @yerapotato-wp  @browneyedgirl365  @thysagclub  @sparklycloudnight  @helloatomicshadow  @queentorresstuff @vtte @val-gal  @lucy-bunny17  @aaliyahh0  @katluckybear  @boyleanti  @straybids  @franchesca-791  @cosmicstorm19  @averyisbackinthetrashcan  @aomi-nabi  @xlanawriter  @allensimpsforcorpse  @sunnyrae-cessh  @ladykxxx08  @meowiemari  @renupf  @booklover76  @sra-verissimo

#corpse husband #corpse #corpse fanfic #corpse fanfiction #corpse fluff #corpse fandom #corpse fic #corpse x y/n #corpse x you #corpse x reader #corpse imagine #corpse imagines #corpse husband fanfic #corpse husband x y/n #corpse husband x reader #corpse husband fanficiton #corpse husband fanfiction #corpse husband fic #corpse husband fluff #corpse husband imagine #corpse simp #fic #fanfic #fanfiction #fandom #fluff #requests open #request #x reader #reader

[cryptiql]

cherry starbursts

pairing: bakugou/reader (male reader in mind but is gender neutral)

warnings: none, i think?? lots of cussing though, courtesy of lord explosion murder

words: 3.6k

a/n: yuzuya's audios giving me so much brainrot...gonna be thinking about this all week. also the way this started out as god tier writing but gradually turned into shit at the end 🏃 nonetheless, i hope i did this gremlin man justice </3

a contemplative hum tickles your throat as you observe the paragraph laid out before you, the pads of your fingers tingling as you trail them across the pages. on the occasions where you've found your nose nestled deep within them, a muted scent of pears and sawdust would invade your senses, and the urge to rest your head in the plains of your chemistry textbook would become overwhelming. however, the threat of being cuffed over the head by a rolled up magazine makes you think twice about slacking off, so you begrudgingly slump back into your seat with a resigned huff. the clock in your dorm is no doubt ticking away like always; the second hand rounding at great speeds while the minute and hour hands crawl by at a sluggish pace; but you aren't there to hear it.

instead, you reside in bakugou's room, basking in the unencumbered atmosphere created solely by his diligent efforts to keep his space clean and organized. it's just the way he is, you have to remind yourself. not because you stubbed your toe on his dumbbells last week and he felt sufficiently guilty as to make sure nothing was in your path the next time you visited. that would be silly. all that considered, bakugou's room isn't much different from your own—save for the few comfort objects brought from home that give off a hospitable air—but the lack of stimulus it holds is apparent. anything that could disturb your tranquil study date has either been stored away or placed beyond your reach.

damn him, the bastard! he's completely oblivious, you silently muse, bracing your elbows on the desk to plant your face in the palms of your hands. you chastise yourself at the same moment for forgetting your headphones, but in your defense, bakugou screaming for you to hurry up had prompted a hasty departure. if he had the patience to wait two more minutes. . .

rather than finishing the thought, you pull the textbook closer, hoping that somehow the enlarged print will stick to your brain like a temporary tattoo. you only need this information long enough to pass the exam, but once it's over, you swear you'll never mention anything chemistry related unless it's the bond between you and your neighbor. the idle scratching of pencil led against paper erupts from his side of the room, lessening the static in your head by a fraction, but it doesn't last. he mutters something unintelligible under his breath as you spin in your chair to look at him in desperation.

he remains ignorant for the next minute or so, only glancing up at you briefly before returning to his notes. your nostrils flare as you reach down to untangle your laces and pull off your shoe. you chickened out last time this happened, but being ignored has successfully fed the flames of your frustration, and you simply will not stand for it any longer. you blame your sleep-addled mentality for the lack of better aim, but it stokes your pride when bakugou flinches as your shoe hurdles past his shoulder.

"the hell was that for, dumbass!?" he growls, his eyes narrowing into slits. you respond with a high pitched whine; one that would be considered overexaggerated in his opinion, but in yours, was perfectly reasonable when being held against your will to study a subject that has no business being this tedious. "sukiii, i'm booored."

the blonde makes a 'tch' sound, positioning his arm in a warning manner before throwing his pencil at you, which you manage to catch easily. you revel in the deflated expression he wears, twirling the pencil between your fingers and kicking a leg over one arm of the chair. all this, while never breaking eye contact, was sure to break through to him. you're hopeful, what with the way katsuki's gaze—gradually failing to hide his infatuation—travels over your build from head to toe. whether because you giggle at his reaction or decide to kick your feet like a giddy child, he snaps out of his trance with an all too familiar scowl and shuts his own textbook with unnecessary force. his demanding stare is fixated on you as he tosses it haphazardly to the edge of the bed.

"give me back my pencil, idiot." he completely ignores your previous statement and jumps straight into business, as always. "give me back my shoe first, hot stuff." you challenge, smirking in a way that you very well know gets him hot under the collar. the teasing endearment will either put the odds in your favor; earning you your shoe as desired, and perhaps the lovely little blush that often dusts his face whenever you flirt with him; or seal your fate in hell where the everlasting flames may burn similarly, if not just as hotter than bakugou's explosions. it has taken years of practice to uphold your smug attitude in the face of his unyielding rage; nose wrinkled and canines grinding. even now, he is the image of perfection—a powerful god emblazoned in brimstone and baneful inferno—and you, a mere lover of art. after a moment, bakugou's resolve seems to falter. his piecing glare relents only slightly to give way for a pensive expression as he sighs, gently rubbing along the bridge of his nose with his thumb and forefinger. he throws you your shoe while standing from the bed, and as you slip it on, he shuffles over to his clothes drawer to pull out his own pair of sneakers. this prompts you to raise a brow inquisitively, but your silent question is left unanswered up until bakugou claps a hand on your shoulder and grumbles.

"c'mon, i'm fucking starving. there's a seven eleven nearby that's got spicy ramen."

and just like that, all thoughts pertaining to the test have been pulverized to dust by katsuki's unrelenting fists. the promise of food after hours of relentless mental abuse has you brushing off the sudden change of inclination in seconds, meanwhile the hothead to your right mulls over it during your trek through the empty hallways, stuffing his arms into the holes of his jacket. he had been able to overlook your constant fidgeting and intermittent noises of vexation, but too soon it became obvious that you weren't getting anywhere with the session. he would have simply offered to help if not for his own inability to concentrate, which had made itself known within the last half hour when he caught himself staring at you between taking notes. so what if he found your pouting cute? just maybe, he had started to fall in love with the way your brows furrowed at the instance of a misunderstood question; the absentminded tugging of your earlobe; the way your eyes looked without seeing, as if the smallest things held the greatest importance. sure, the tapping of your nails against a desk was a bit much, but he could always put a stop to your fretting by lacing your fingers together and kissing the back of your hand. just maybe, your bashful reactions made him want to hold you closer; to see you lounging across his lap—a throne befitting for a king—with your rose hued cheeks nestled in the crook of his neck.

not that you needed to know any of that. no fucking way would he endow another reason for you to tease him when the list was already so long.

curfew isn't for another hour, but bakugou would rather not waste time dawdling, so he uses this as reasoning for hooking your arm with his and practically hauling you out the exit. he mutters something about you being "too fucking slow" and "leaving you behind if you don't keep up", but the fact that he's dragging you along at all shows that he would have no problem resorting to desperate matters. the right amount of groveling and or compromising might mean a piggyback ride to the store, but regardless of how tempting the idea is, you decide not to further burden your friend with carrying you.

the towering shape of heights alliance becomes more and more like a speck of dust as your journey continues, the weight of your thoughts heavy on your already weary mind. you eye katsuki's side profile, noting the distinct lack of malice upon his handsome features, and smile softly to yourself. friend. it was the first word that occurred to you, albeit the least desirable and in no way comparable to the term that caused your heart to flutter within the confinements of your ribcage.

you aren't together. you don't know if you'll ever be, but when the the milieu; brimming with chaotic screams, booming laughter and disorderly merriment belonging to that of your closest friends; is whisked from the narrative, katsuki looks at you differently. whatever fragments of disdain and spite tend to crumble within the first few seconds and are replaced by an emotion that was unheard of ever having manifested in the depths of his vermillion hues. it holds a semblance to adoration, perhaps even respect, and for as long as you can recall, that is all you've wanted to see from him: to be regarded like no other.

sure, it's not like how you dreamed—he isn't very affectionate in public, though you doubt he would be even if you were together, and it always stings when he shrugs your affections off with a deriding comment—but that's just it. it's not a dream. after every scornful remark; after the day has passed and the dwindling moon takes its place in the evening sky, breaking through the curtains of his dorm; he'll kiss your hand, your blooming cheeks, your lips, all to atone for it. where no one else can see, he treats you like a divine being, and part of you wishes to think that it's because he's selfish. a bit of possessiveness has lead to many nights of a shared bed, ruffled sheets and smothering cuddles, but who are you to complain? everything he gives you is more real than any well-constructed reverie.

he may not be yours, and you may not be his, but no one else will suffice for either of you, and that is the unspoken truth.

the minimal bitterness in the autumn breeze makes for a refreshing atmosphere with the only discontent being the hunger that claws at your stomach. bakugou has never been merciful towards anyone, let alone the self-acclaimed nuisance who interrupts his studying with half-baked plans of adventure, but you're ever so grateful for the rare times where he is.

you know you won't have to wait long now that the smell of milk bread and takoyaki trickles into the air, much like the faint pitter patter of raindrops on the concrete. the shower is horribly ill-timed, but you hardly mind, especially when the droplets cling to bakugou's eyelashes like crystalline gemstones; glimmering faintly with every blink as they catch the suns rays. it settles below the horizon, only a sliver of golden yellow to be seen dancing in the tree boughs above, and the fuck if the way it illuminates your not-boyfriend's visage isn't absolutely breathtaking. the glimpse of honeyed skin and kissable lips—pulled into a pensive pout—draws you in deeper, and deeper, and oh god i've been caught—

"you got a staring problem, dumbass?" he grumbles, a roseal color dusting his ears that he swears is from the cold.

even his offensive nicknames are laced with an abnormal tenderness, and knowing that you're the only one with the privilege to hear it causes your chest to swell with delight. you nibble your bottom lip, hoping that it will somehow hide the fleet of giggles bubbling in your throat, but it does no such thing. "yeah, it's weird. whenever i see something beautiful, i just feel compelled to stare at it."

you don't need to look at him to know you've struck a nerve, but you do anyways, and his face grows redder under the intensity of your teasing leer. he sputters, curses falling from past his lips like a waterfall, and rips his arm from your grasp to cradle it as if you've burned him. any sane person would have backed down the second mini explosions began flaring up from his palms, however, you are perhaps the exact opposite, as to be expected when surrounding yourself with the infamous bakusquad, who (excluding bakugou) procured one braincell to share amongst themselves. years of having to put up with and, by extension, learn how to effectively handle bakugou's fits have proven to be time well spent.

you remain none the wiser to the concerned stares of others as he spouts a line of insults; incomprehensible from behind his curled fist pressed tightly to his mouth.

"you-you can't just say that kinda shit out loud, dumbass!" and although he may seem mad, he's already dragging you down the street. you test your luck by huddling closer and resting your chin on his shoulder, your steady pace never faltering.

"is the katsuki bakugou stumbling over his words from a little compliment?" it almost feels like you've won, but then the blonde proceeds to cover your face with his still damp hand. the little shit had timed it perfectly so that your open mouth would taste the saltiness of his sweat—quite the contrary to its sugary caramel aroma—and if you weren't so preoccupied by the resonance of his cackling laugh, you might have spent the rest of the trip gagging and complaining about the whole ordeal. he hardly seems bothered, wiping your saliva on his trousers and going forth with that customary lumbering strut, which always has you torn between fawning, chortling or questioning if he has fucking weights down his pants.

nonetheless, you can't help but murmur how cute he looks as you swing your free arm in tune with your steps.

by the time you've arrived at the shop, the sun has long since disappeared; welcoming hues of purple, navy blue and hints of orange to dapple the heavens, along with the foretelling of stars. you can't begin to describe how lucky you are to be living in a city with such beautiful scenery, even when the thin clouds of smog from factories often hinder your view of it. the fluorescent lights from the 'open' sign flash sporadically, casting a cobalt glow to dance across your dazed expression. katsuki watches with intent, chuckling at how easily distracted you can get as he tugs you inside by the cloth of your shirt.

the person behind the cash register spares a customary greeting before returning to their magazine, and bakugou makes a beeline for the intended isle, something akin to excitement radiating from him. he wears it much differently, and it resembles is go-to callous guise in almost every way, but you're able to detect the slight shift in demeanor as if its the easiest thing in the world. you hardly register that he's removed himself from you until the distance grows too large to ignore, and you shuffle over to the place beside him with a newfound adrenaline. the crisp air of the corner store heightens your senses as you tap your foot to the pop song playing overhead.

the only other sound is of katsuki examining the ramen and deciding what level of spice he should get, encouraging you to ponder what sort of hellish nightmare he has planned for the rest of the group. it was just last week when he dared kaminari to try some of the noodles, and the poor boy had spent ten minutes weeping in snot-nosed agony that you would have to be insane to put something that hot in your mouth. bakugou had laughed at his misery and carried on eating with vigor, mocking the others for their weak taste buds.

after a beat of silence, you decide to test your luck again by poking is shoulder, as well as batting your eyelashes at him and cocking your head to the side.

"can we get some candy?"

bakugou waves his hand dismissively, which is all the conformation you need before rounding the corner to peruse the variety of sweets on display. you immediately spot the marked parcels of sour gumdrops and assorted licorice and giggle to yourself as you pick them out, unaware of the gentle smile the blonde wears in regards to your child-like glee.

"yeah, just don't eat it all in one sitting. you go through that shit way too fast—it's unhealthy."

you won't bother commenting on his strict, motherly advisement, because you know it's in his best interest. he's grumbled about "stuffing your body with all that garbage" on numerous occasions, and while the hypocrisy might have annoyed you at one point ("and i assume gouging yourself on spicy ramen is completely different?") you realized rationing your candy would benefit both your health and your wallet. you nod, despite knowing he can't see, and idly feel for your back pocket, wondering just how much katsuki plans to stock up. money isn't exactly an issue, so you suppose it doesn't matter, but the amount of packets he normally brings back is downright criminal.

"don't be shy," he eventually says, "i'm buying. you're responsible enough not to buy out the whole store, right?"

your confusion overwhelms the urge to roll your eyes at his sarcasm, but there also lies a hint of elation that he would offer to buy.

"i figured i'd be paying as compensation for messing with you." you stand on the tips of your toes to poke your head over the isle, feeling very tempted to ruffle his hair whilst he gathers the packages of ramen into his basket.

"nah, you can pay me back in some other way." his eyes flick upwards to meet your devilish smirk, and he turns away with an affronted noise, blood rushing to his cheeks.

"oh? i can't wait to see what you have in mind~."

and there go the sparks. they last but a few moments before katsuki composes himself, presumably because he realizes making a scene won't help the situation, but he still throws a glare at you from a distance as he beckons you closer. it seems like he's gotten all he needs, so you hastily grab whatever sweets are left on your mental list and rush back to the counter. a comfortable silence sits between you both as your items are checked out, and in that time, you observe the significant difference between pre-late-night-shopping-run bakugou and food-deprived-study-date bakugou. his shoulders are more relaxed, as is his facial appearance, and you'll be damned if you ever forget the way he smiles when he catches you looking from his peripheral vision.

it's soft and unguarded and leaves you struggling for breath as he waits for the cashier to turn away, then promptly laces your fingers together. what? katsuki takes the bag and pulls you effortlessly; like a ragdoll; a mere toy at his disposal; out into the brisk evening. his thumb brushes the back of your hand, making you jump in surprise at the suddenness of it, and he titters freely. what? the streetlamps glint brightly, flickering at random intervals as you travel onward at a leisurely pace. the roads closest to U.A. aren't as packed as the ones deeper into the city, and thus you are the only two souls to be found, save for the few cars that speed by under the faint luminescence of nearing traffic lights. katsuki squeezes your palm, then slithers his hand out of your hold to replace it at your waist, methodically caressing the skin there in a way that has your knees buckling. you sputter witlessly, attempting to catch the thoughts that flee from your mind like birds to the wind. the blonde is nothing less than ecstatic to be the reason for your flustered state, and he takes full advantage of it by leaning in and hovering his mouth just inches from your own.

"i'll take my payment now." and oh lord, you think. he doesn't have to ask me twice. your lips collide with his, molding together like melted toffee; just as sweet and addictive. you've shared kisses before; ones that left you bruised and scrambling for a coverup the next day; ones that felt like fire but were tinged with honey that soothed your throat; fleeting ones that were never enough. you were sure that your need for affection would never truly be satiated unless it was from the boy you held most dear, and with the moon as your sole witness, katsuki was happy to oblige.

"starbursts. . ." he huffs after pulling away, massaging your hip to subdue your dissatisfied hum. "you taste like cherry starbursts."

he doesn't seem to mind by the way he leans in for another kiss, and another, and another, until you're a jittery mess in his arms. you press against his chest, a wistful sigh escaping you when you part once more.

"not that i'm complaining, but where's this coming from? you're usually not so touchy." the last bit of your utterance trails off as bakugou presses his lips to your forehead and keeps them there. moments pass, and when he finally pulls away, its to hide his blush by walking ahead of you. "i should be able to kiss my partner whenever i please, shouldn't i?" he doesn't even give you a chance to catch up, because his words have you rooted to the spot. what urges your feet to move is the haughty smirk he tosses over his shoulder, and even then, the race has only begun; your demands for him to stop echoing down the street as you chase him.

cheeky bastard.

#💥.katsuki #bakugou x male reader #katsuki bakugou x male reader #bakugou x gn!reader #male reader insert #mha x male reader #gn reader #mha x gn!reader #boku no hero x reader #bakugou x you

[dungeonsanddragonsfifthedition]

late boylore (because i have fallen ill) is boylore nevertheless. today is october 23, 2020. i might not have everything today!

in fuck the undead all my homies hate the undead news: he hated avantika sooo much. he was actively grouchy about radiant not hurting her more than it normally would.

in yes king killing and murder news: without vision, he blasted a lobstrosity into pieces, and was briefly (jokingly) worried thay he killed yasha

in Beefy Boy news: this fuckin skinny idiot got poisoned and paralyzed but he got better thru sheet force of will. icon

in Healer news: clutch use of mass cure wounds! gosh! sometimes a healing spell reminds me that i should be better at healing my party in battle, with my cleric. that was one of those numbers

in nature is an int skill news: he made an "i don't know" noise that made my heart happy, in response to fjord's typical assumption that caduceus is omnipotent. nature dumbass solidarity

in goofs news: the power was in avantika all along

in SwordQuest news: i just think there's something to be said on caduceus' fixation on brokenness here; that his first "project" reveals the full scope of its divinity (matt said it exalted!) around the same time caduceus begins to become comfortable with his own "brokenness"? but also it's kind of cool that something caduceus fixated on because it was beautiful and needed help is such a powerful and important thing, anyway. i love he and i love sword

in fuck mages all my homies hate mages news: he hates vess so much, and he's right. (however, i, a lesbian who loves evil and powerful magic women... hate her but in a more fun way)

in love language news: i could write a million words on cad's use of gold and food to just show affection for his friends, and the fucking hot chocolate scene... made me tear up? i'm not kidding. he was so EXCITED! and also i would love hot chocolate bombs irl; my sick brain refuses to tell me if they exist or not. anyway. he loves his friends and he wants to keep them safe and healthy, and making warm food for loved ones is the softest shit in the world.

bonus talks update, because i am thinking of this: he has the gentlest problems, is all. he's sweet. and tal agrees. and also, just to reiterate, he doesn't want to go home!

#cr spoilers #caduceus clay #caduceus #cr #boylore

[queenlua]

You're a druid and an ex-evangelical, right? What does being a druid mean to you? How did you get from evangelicalism to where you are now? And of course feel free to ignore this if it's nosy. (sincerely, a Christian who wants to leave but who doesn't know what to do)

this is going to make me sound ignorant as hell, lol, but i'm happy to share

under a cut because this got very long, sorry, lol.

my personal progression was: "vaguely christian -> VERY christian -> christian agnostic -> agnostic/atheist -> agnostic/druid -> some sorta druid-neopagan-animist thing."  i guess i'll just go through what made me switch between each of those, and close out with some high-level thoughts that may be helpful for you?

okay, so when i was

VAGUELY CHRISTIAN,

i went to Sunday school every week because That's What You Do, and because my whole hometown was very southern Baptist, i never questioned the veracity of its teachings much... until they ran a whole weekly series on "why [x] is wrong," where [x] is some other group

e.g., we had a week on why Mormons are wrong, and i didn't bat an eye because i hadn't even known Mormons existed until that moment

then we had a week on why Muslims are wrong, and that... bothered me, because i had a friend who was Muslim, and she was just objectively a better person than me, and i was like "any universe where she goes to hell and i don't seems really fucked up"

then we had a week on why EVOLUTION was wrong, and that just absolutely threw me, because while i hadn't thought about evolution much (i think i was in fourth grade or so), it seemed common-sense? scientists thought highly of it? "adaptation over time" just seems logical?

so i went to the public library every day after school for like a week, read some Darwin and some science books, and came back to my Sunday school teacher with, like, an itemized list of objections to the whole "evolution is wrong" thing.  and he came up with some standard Answers In Genesis rebuttals, and i did more research and came back the next week with more science, and we repeated this a few times until he was like "lua, you just gotta take some things on faith"

which.  lmao.  full existential crisis time, because no matter how hard i thought, i couldn't *not* believe in the science, but i also didn't want to go to hell, so i was like "maybe if i believe SUPER HARD i will SOMEDAY be able to unbelieve the condemn-me-to-hell bits"

so i decided to become

VERY CHRISTIAN

and my frantic googling for shit like "proof of god" and "god and evolution" *eventually* broke me out of the Answers In Genesis circles of the internet, and into some decent Christian apologia, like, think First Things and various Catholic bloggers.  and there, i found some way to square my gut sense that evolution was right, with a spiritual worldview.

like, i remember finding some blogger who said:

"young earth creationists get tripped up when they try to explain stars that are millions of light-years away, and end up basically arguing that God's tricking us somehow, and—no!  my God lets you believe in the evidence of your eyes, my God does not demand that you make yourself ignorant or stupid, my God expects you to use your brain"

and i just started crying at my computer, because no one had ever said "using your brain is Good and part of God's will," i was like *finally* here's someone who won't tell me i'm going to hell for just *thinking* about things

(st. augustine does a much better riff on a similar theme, fwiw, but i only found him later)

still, it was an uneasy fit, because, the more i learned and read about world history, the more it seemed... weird... that the One And Singular Path To Salvation was... the successor to some niche desert cult... which didn't even occur at the *beginning* of written history, like, it was all predated by that whole Mithraism thing, etc... and like, sure, i could trot out all the standard theological talking points for why Actually This Makes Perfect Sense, but gut-level-wise, the aesthetics just seemed kinda dumb!  and no level of talking myself out of it made that feeling go away!

so at this point i started referring to myself as a

CHRISTIAN AGNOSTIC

i mean, not aloud.  i still lived in southernbaptistopia and i didn't want, like, my hair stylist to tell me i was a horrible person.  but in my *head* i called myself Christian agnostic and it felt right.

and i started church-hopping, which honestly was really fun, would recommend to anyone at any point.  i visited the fire-and-brimstone baptist church, the methodist church, the episcopalians, the universal unitarians, etc.

unfortunately, while this gave me *some* new perspectives, each of the places either had the same shitty theology as my old megachurch (i remember the *acute* sense of despair i felt when i was starting to jive with a methodist church... only for the dumbass youth minister to start going on about evolution), or, they just lacked any sense of the *sacred*.  like, the Church of Christ churches, with their a capella services, *definitely* had it; i felt more God there in one service than i did in a lifetime of shitty Christian rock at the megachurch.  but their beliefs were even *more* batshit, so.  big L on that one.

having failed to find a satisfactory church, i was basically

AGNOSTIC/ATHEIST

by the time i went to college, but honestly pretty unhappy about it; while it was harder than ever for me to actually *connect* with the divine, i didn't like thinking that my previous experiences of the divine were total lies.  because my shitty evangelical church, for all its faults, could not *completely* sabotage the sense of God's presence.  there were real moments in that church where i do believe i experienced something divine.  mostly mediated by one particular youth minister, who in hindsight was the only spiritual teacher in that church who didn't seem a bit rotten inside, but!  it was something!

so when i happened upon a bunch of writings on the now-defunct shii.org (that's the bit that makes me look WILDLY ignorant, lol), i was utterly captivated.

said author was a previous archdruid of the Reformed Druids of North America, an organization that was formed in the 1960s to troll the administration of Carleton College (there was a religious-service-attendance requirement; they made their own religion; their religion had whiskey and #chilltimes for its services).  however, this shii.org dude seemed to take it pretty seriously.  he was studying history of religion and blogged a lot about his studies, both academic and otherwise.  while RDNA had started out as a troll, that didn't mean they hadn't *discovered* something real in the process, he said.

this, already, was going to be innately appealing to me; i've got a soft spot for wow-we-were-doing-this-ironically-but-now-it's-kinda-real? stuff in general.

in particular, shii.org’s discussions on the separation of ritual from belief was really interesting to me: most religions/spiritualities have *both*, but like, you can do a ritual without having the Exact Right Beliefs (if there even is such a thing!), and it can still be useful to you, it can have real power.  (he had a really lovely essay, speculating on the origins of religion as just a form of art, but that essay is now lost to the sands of time, alas.)

(note that i wouldn't really recommend seeking out *recent* writing by the shii.org guy; he kinda went full tedious neoreactionary-blowhard-who-reads-a-lot-of-Spengler at some point?  sigh.)

the shii.org guy led me to checking out a bunch of books on the history of neopaganism & also books by scholars of religion in general, and the more i read, the more excited i became.  and i started doing little ritual/meditation stuff here and there.

then i was fortunate enough to attend some events with Earthspirit (this was when i lived in Boston), which cemented my hippie dalliances into something more real.  the folks there, being from Boston, were all ridiculously overeducated (a sensibility that appeals to me), but also, being the kind of folks who drive out to a mountain in the middle of nowhere for a spiritual retreat, they tolerated a full range of oddities (everyone from aging-70s-feminist-wiccans to living-on-a-farm-with-your-bros-Astaru to dude-who-started-having-weird-visions-and-is-just-trying-to-figure-out-the-deal to Nordic-spiritualist-with-two-phds-from-Scandanavian-universities-on-the-subject, etc), which gave me a lot of room to explore different types of rituals, ceremonies, "magic", etc.

(polytheism in general lends itself well to this sort of easy plurality!  i can believe other people are experiencing something real with their gods, and i can be talking to a totally different set of gods, and that’s just all very compatible, etc)

anyway, i started calling myself

AGNOSTIC/DRUID

around then, because i knew i'd found *something*, something that felt like all the realest moments i'd ever had in nature, and all the realest moments i'd ever had in that shitty megachurch, but i wasn't quite ready to put a theology to it.

but, idk, you do the thing for a while, and you start encountering some things that you may as well call gods, and you realize you're in pretty deep, and you ditch the "agnostic" bit and just throw hands and start describing yourself as

SOME SORTA DRUID-NEOPAGAN-ANIMIST THING

because that's the most precise thing you can muster.  in particular, the druid bit resonates because nature's still very much at the center of my practice; the neopagan bit resonates because i'm not especially interested in reconstructing older traditions or being faithful to any actual pre-Christian traditions, and animist resonates because what i sometimes call gods seem to be tied pretty tightly to the land itself.  it's all very experiential; all this mostly means i'm some weird chick who sometimes grabs a car and drives out someplace very lonely and hikes for a while and does some hippie shit to try and talk with the land or the god or whatever is there.  and sometimes i come back from it changed, or refocused, or what-have-you, and hopefully i'm better for it.  i'm aware this makes me look a little ridiculous, and is an unsatisfying answer, sorry!

WRT YOUR SITUATION

i don't know you or your situation, obviously, but if i wanted to give former-me some advice to save her some angst, i'd say

-> Christendom itself is far wilder and more diverse than many churches lead you to believe.  if you still want to be Christian on some level, and it's just a shitty church that's convinced you the whole project is fucked, i'd honestly explore, i dunno, your nearest Quaker meeting.  they're invoking the Holy Spirit with regularity but they're not raging douchenozzles about it.

-> if you're specifically interested in druidism, i found John Michael Greer's "A World Full of Gods" really nice.  (caveat: Greer has *also* gone full right-wing nutjob these days, sigh, so like.  would not recommend a great swath of his writing.  but that one's good)

-> deciding that a just God wouldn't give me a brain and then ask me not to use it was hugely comforting to me.  like, that was the start of the whole process, that was what made me feel ok searching for other churches and trying to find something that fit.  obviously you should take this with 800 grains of salt, because obviously i'm no longer Christian, and thus maybe i'm just some poor misguided fallen soul, but... i still kinda believe that!  maybe if you can make yourself believe that, it'll seem less scary?

idk, happy to answer more questions, sorry for the long ramble, hope it helped~

#druid stuff

[vampyrasa]

i know i jokingly call the count a dumbass (and he is, to a degree, when it comes to judging the consequences of his actions), but i also don’t want to underplay the reality of how insanely dangerous his mind is.  he forsook his human memories for the ability to memorize the laws of mathematics, science and language, and has penned down every piece of human history that has passed during his lifetime and continued the penmanship of solomonari that came before him.  but he uses this against humanity instead, affectively breaking every covenant/vow and rite that he had taken within the order.   he plans 10 steps ahead, all the intricate details, and is exceedingly cunning in how he can utilize the aspect of fear.   he is using the whole of humanity’s past against them and drawing from what memories he can of his human life in order to spread an intricate trap for them; his soldiers, created from alchemically destroying a human body and turning it into the living body of a demon (an innocent devil) where the soul is permanently corrupted... it is body horror to the highest degree, and he has in canon been known to turn these creatures on their former loved ones out of revenge. he knows intimately what things will break a human being down and how to psychologically destroy them, because it was done to him.  he’s survived hell itself and managed to come back in less than one piece, less than whole, but knows the methods of the devil and inflicts them on mankind. 

he is aware this is an endless war, and somewhat revels in this fact.  he views it as a way to permanently disrupt ‘’god’s plan’’ and essentially be a nuisance to the cosmic powers that be, who have consistently sent hunters of all sorts after him, be them old friends/enemies or whole families of divine slayers.  he has been utterly blinded by his own hatred however, and this makes for the worst kind of loneliness that he can suffer.  he punishes himself in this way, though does not see it that way.  he knows they will come for him, that they will cut him down and he will (despite all odds) rise again.  he knows that the true way to kill him is to cause him to cease to exist - to get him to enter the space of purgatory rather than heaven or hell - and that would require him to seek penance for what he has done, and therefore feel regret for it.  and it will not ever happen.  not until god himself gives recompense for his suffering in some way, which will also never happen.  so he fills himself with books and stories, the words of the wise, writes them all down and surrounds himself with ancient things that have seen the same level of bloodshed that he has.  and it is a lonely existence and vicious cycle that will likely never be broken.   the ultimate goal is to destroy the human race in totality, as he feels that no one left within it can be counted as an innocent, and that the innocence of eden would be better off without them ( a strangely religious thought, if you think about it).  and this ultimately includes vampire-kind as well once their food source is gone, though he won’t speak that part outloud when he spouts gospel of vampiric dominion and his sovereignty.

#♔. ˋ like a drowning in the heart like falling endlessly from the skin to the soul . ˊ character study. #religion tw

[elliepassmore]

Children of Blood and Bone review

4.5/5 stars Recommended for people who like: magic, fantasy, non-Western fantasy, multiple POVs, A Song of Wraiths and Ruins I really liked the worldbuilding and thought the world was very vibrant. I liked that the story took us to multiple different places so we got to see a wide range of Orïsha's environments and people. Adeyemi did a good job of incorporating maji/diviners-kosidan relationships into each location so that they felt realistic. One town might have a mix of both where the maji/diviners get shaken down by the guards in a 'normal' way while the next might be brutal for the maji/diviners, and yet another might treat them as relative equals. The way the guards treated the maji/diviners was also realistic, unfortunately, and you can definitely see the influences of real-world laws and actions in the ones present in Orïsha. The magic system overall makes sense and I don't think it needs a ton of explaining: diviners as baby!maji who will get their powers from one of the gods/esses at age 13, the magic is usually passed through the maternal line so kids tend to have the same kind of magic as the mom's, and there are chants/prayers/incantations to the gods that allow the magic to flow. Simple enough. However, the incantations end up getting a bit tricky later on in the book. For one, we pretty much always see Zelie using incantations when she calls her magic, but some of the other magic-using characters are never mentioned as using incantations. While some of them, like Zélie, probably remember a few from before the Raid, that can't be true for all of them, especially ones who are too young or who get a power that doesn't correspond with one their parent had. So that bit felt a little rushed, but overall I liked the magic system in the book and Zélie's way of describing magic was interesting. As for Zélie herself: she's got a fire in her and she's determined to get things done, even if she sometimes doubts her abilities to lead. She balances herself quite well between being afraid of the guards and retaliation and rebellion, and generally seems to keep a good balance, though I do have to agree with Tzain that sometimes she does stuff without thinking. I particularly liked how much joy she took from her diviner/maji heritage and her awareness that simply living her heritage was rebellion within itself. There was a bit toward the end where she was getting doubtful about magic which was kind of confusing since she'd also used magic to fight and for more debatable reasons, but whatever. Overall I liked her character. With Amari I was kind of lost at first as to how people could call her a badass, but I definitely get it now. I'll will admit that I didn't and still don't see how she and Zelie are such great friends. Friends, definitely. But best friends? I don't think they're there yet. Something I definitely appreciate about Amari was how willing she was to learn. Some of the things she came into contact with once outside the palace scared her, but she was open to explanations and other perspectives, which was great considering her upbringing (and considering Inan's chapters). I feel like Amari really came into herself in the second half of the book. She finally gets a chance to fight for something she believes in and I think it helped transform her character from someone who shied away from the blade she knew how to use to someone who would wield a sword to defend herself and others. I could definitely see her becoming a commander of some kind in the future, though I'm not entirely sure if 'queen' suits her (I am not entirely certain the title 'ruler' suits anyone in this book). Inan is the last POV character and he was...he was a lot. Amari and Zelie are definitely my favorites, but Inan is someone I could probably do with having less page time. This boy has zero convictions of his own and is completely unable to look past his nose. Unlike Amari, he continues to believe his father's words even traveling around and doesn't really spare a second thought to how reality might actually be. The one thing I'll say in his defense is that Amari did have Binta growing up and was able to see that at least one diviner wasn't bad, which I do think helped for her to generalize this idea to other diviners/maji, whereas Inan didn't have a figure like that in his life. But enough of that. Inan is wishy-washy and swings one way then the other (though never completely all the way), and he is far too willing to return to his old ideals when things get challenging or scary. I mean, for fuck's sake he isn't even really the one suffering most of these times and is still all too ready to give up. Like, please grow a spine, buddy. I do think Adeyemi actually did a really good job of writing Inan in the sense that she manages to capture the effects abuse and gaslighting and show just how much of an effect those things can have on your psyche. So in that sense Inan was a 'good' character, but I don't think he's a good person nor do I like him. Tzain was someone whom I felt was in the background for a lot of the book. He supports Zelie and is willing to go off with her to do all these things and protects her and stands by her even when she fucks up. He is also able to be nice to Amari despite her being the princess and the daughter of the man who caused a lot of his problems. From what we do see of him Tzain seems to have a good sense of humor and is funny at times. He's also clearly holding in a lot of pain, trauma, and responsibility, though he rarely shows it. I definitely think he feels responsible for his father and Zelie and that whenever something bad happens to either of them he feels guilty, even if there was nothing he could've done. While he blames Zélie for a lot of things, which I don't like AT ALL but at the same time understand needing to direct your anger somewhere, I get the feeling he's mostly blaming himself. In terms of relationships. Someone please explain to me why there needed to be any in this book in the first place? Inan and Zélie are the main pairing, which is just dumb af since he wants to kill her for almost the entirety of the book then, after like two whole days of being together, they decide everything's fine and dandy and start kissing. I side with Tzain on this one, even if his phrasing wasn't great. I'll be honest, the Zélie and Inan's whole relationship just confuses me. I don't understand why they like each other other than 'insta-love' and I don't understand 1) why Zélie's willing to Risk It All after Inan being nice for two days, and 2) why she's willing to continue the relationship after what happens with Saran. Perhaps my biggest issue with them is Inan's so-called love wherein he thinks taking away magic will protect Zélie...completely ignoring the fact that part of Zélie is magic. *SPOILER, SKIP TO NEXT PARAGRAPH TO AVOID* That complete and utter dumbass doesn't seem to connect the fact that he stopped feeling Zélie's soul when Zélie stopped feeling magic. Like? Brains? No brains here. *SPOILER END* Okay, moving on. Tzain and Amari have better prospects for romance. Adeyemi set them up from the very beginning, even if Tzain might've initially seen her as a pretty face. They grow to like and respect for one another and I feel like their relationship could actually go somewhere. But why, why oh why does Adeyemi make Amari mention the L-word? Like, honey, you are not in love with this boy after only knowing him a week. Crush, sure. Love, no. But that matters not, since there is at least the potential. Actually, something re: relationships that I felt Adeyemi kind of brushed over (and it seems like other reviews also had this same thought) has to do with Amari. She is very much coded to be bi and it's written as if she and Binta had a romantic relationship, but Adeyemi never follows through with this. I honestly thought that Amari and Zelie were going to be the main pairing of the book at first, or failing that that Amari would have feelings for Zélie, Zélie wouldn't reciprocate, then Amari would move on to another female character. But nope. Nada. I mean, Tzain's good too, but it's just weird the way the whole thing with Amari's romantic interest(s) was/were written. Now onto something else: the throne. While becoming the next ruler isn't an outright object for either Inan or Amari (or anyone else), being heir definitely sits on Inan's shoulders and drives a lot of what he does. Likewise, Amari comes to the realization that if she were the next on the throne she could help the diviners/maji and overturn the laws and the system that her father created. The current king, Saran, sucks all around and definitely doesn't deserve his head being attached to his body. But we already knew that. The point is, Inan is clearly not good for Orïsha because he can't form his own convictions and leans solely on what he's been taught to think is right. He does, however, think he is the only person who can keep Orïsha safe and protected. Amari, on the other hand, knows she won't be queen and doesn't seem to really want to be queen until she realized what that could mean for what she believes in. However, and there's always a 'however,' she also kind of has Mad Queen Energy about her at times after she makes this decision. She is, in my opinion, also not a great contender for the throne. As mentioned, I think she'd make a great general, but there's something about her that makes me hesitate before supporting her bid for the throne. Do I think she'd be better than Saran or Inan? Absolutely. But probably so would Yemi, that doesn't mean she should get the throne. Perhaps I am merely feeling particularly democratic today, but I don't believe an absolute monarch will help Orïsha. If we are being realistic, I don't even know if a democratic one would either, but power in the hands of a diverse many would probably be better than power in the hands of one. Overall I enjoyed the story. I thought the plot was good and I enjoyed going with the characters as they (mostly) struggled to get magic back. Inan served to be a good character for demonstrating how our childhood can influence the kind of people we become and also serves as a nice foil to Amari, who has decided to be the opposite of her brother. Zélie is a good character to follow since she's so alive. She's got so much rage and love and fear and fire that pushes her every step of the way and helps her overcome so many things. I knocked off half a star for the frivolous reason that I don't like Inan and Zélie's romance and don't think it was necessary for the book. I'll be honest, the book was great, it was tough for me to put down even when I needed to, but for some reason I just don't have any desire to find out what happens in the next one. It's a bit like A Song of Wraiths and Ruin like that for me. I just...don't feel it. I don't think it has anything to do with either book since I couldn't make myself finish reading a new book by one of my favorite authors even though I was enjoying it so...just that kind of year, I suppose.

#book #book review #booklr #tomi adeyemi #children of blood and bone #zelie adebola #magic #fantasy #ya fantasy #characters of color #multiple pov #non-western fantasy