#want to finish it but. leg muscles SO TIRED!

[mommycity]

this is probably because im hungry rn but i cannot stop thinking about how well fed suguru would keep you :((

that man is a DAMN good cook he can fuck it up in the kitchen so of courseee hed whip up whatever you want when your pudgy tummy starts growling and you whine for something from your boyfriend

if youre tired after work/uni/whatever, hed handfeed food to you because he just feels so bad that his baby had to deal with an empty stomach!!! suguru just loves you so much!!!!!!!

going off of that tummy grabber post you made, if youve eaten too much hed lay you between his legs on the couch, put a nice show on, and then rub your midsection (more like gently grope) until it all goes away. then hed probably squeeze and massage you a little more, just in case :)

if you ever get a sudden craving, no matter where the two of you are or what time it is, he WILL go out and buy you whatever you want. 10pm and you want a whole gallon of extra sugary ice cream? hes giving you a kiss and embarking on his journey. 7am and you want a big pasta dish? the search bar is already open and hes looking for nearby italian restaurants. 2pm and your just had lunch but youre still hungry for breakfast? the waffle iron is heating up and hes making the batter from scratch.

theres also leftovers. always. not because neither of you could finish it (sugurus cooking is just so good you think youd be seated at the dining table and be filling yourself up for hours) its so you can always have something to heat up whenever you get hungry and never have to worry about tiring yourself out with a complex meal.

all of this pampering shows on you, of course, but you dont mind. suguru is very appreciative of the extra layers of fat and shows it almost everyday. whether it be through coming up behind you and grabbing wherever the most weight is and jiggling it a bit as a greeting, giving you a kiss on the fullest part of your cheek, buying you tight clothes that show everything off, or having you ride his face (that ones his favorite, he asks for that almost everyday. the other days are booked up by him taking you missionary to watch all the fat in your body ripple everytime he pounds into you)

hes such a gentleman. everytime you feel like doing a food crawl through the various restaurants in tokyo, hell pay for all of it. even if you get all the extra sides and fillings, two sugary drinks, and the biggest and most expensive serving, hell look at you with heart eyes and swipe his card.

obviously, with all the food being put into your belly, youd want him to have some too!!! an effort is made to share with suguru, and he accepts. before, he had an average amount of fat to muscle ratio, but with a combination of your love for food and some tweaks to his workout routine, he ends up with chub lining his thighs, tummy, chest, and arms. of course he adores it, its a physical reminder of how much the two of you love each other :)))

when both of you are sleepy, hungry, and horny at the same time, suguru will have you gently ride him on the couch (hes helping you go up and down carefully) as he feeds you a variety of your favorite snacks and an uncomplicated dinner that he can easily bring to your mouth and his. maybe theres a movie on in the background, maybe hes murmuring words dripped in honey into your ear as you both fatten yourselves while in the throes of pleasure.

suguru just likes when he and his partner are plump, full, and happy. what can he say?

AUGHHHH OP I ALMOST CAME UNTOUCHEDDDD everything is so true.

Not only that real and true info, his way of comforting would be so endearing, albeit a bit unhealthy. He’s talking you through all of your stressors and then providing you with all of the sweetest treats that make you smile. His big hands smooth your hair as you eat so you can simply focus on the taste and nothing more. But sometimes it gets him going!!! Seeing you so focused and content, so pleased with just stuffing your face makes him wanna stuff you with something else. He can’t help the way he feels warm when you look at him after finishing the plate. His dick is jumping leaps and bounds at the white icing that has stickied your lips. Lord help him!!! He might buss if you kiss him with your sugar lips

#jjk #jjk x reader #gn reader #geto suguru #inbox 🛸 #geto x chubby reader #geto suguru x chubby reader

[sixofravens-reads]

Started rearranging my shelves yesterday, and then decided to go on a big hike today and uh, it may be a while before the books get re-shelved...

#want to finish it but. leg muscles SO TIRED! #books #book stacks

[arminsumi]

THE HORNIEST

↳ GOJO さとる + fem!reader

Summary : Horny!Gojo needs you so bad, he's insatiable. A menace.

Warnings : minors do not read/interact : smut/explicit content, it's very horny lol, not proofread, c*mshots and creampies, unprotected sex, multiple rounds, implied drunk sex

Note : lmk if you want more horny gojo lol 👍 reqs open!! anyways lol the title cracks me up. he ain't the strongest he's the horniest :(

Horny!Gojo introduces himself to you in the flirtiest way possible, cooing a sweet and drunk "Who invited the goddess?" into your ear. He's sat on the couch with you, one night at a stupid frat party. Starstruck by you. And your reciprocation made his chest feel fluttery for the first time in years. It also made his dick stand up in his pants.

Horny!Gojo leans into you for the whole night, whispering flirty things and dirty jokes into your ear like his mind is a factory pumping them out. You match his playful energy so well, he says "I think we're made for each other."

Horny!Gojo has his sharp eyes wandering to your thighs, then your shoulders, then your lips as you speak — and he licks his lips to wet them.

Horny!Gojo showers you in compliment after compliment, relishing in your reactions and getting greedier; he needs to get you alone. "Wanna go someplace quieter?" he has to shout over the music to ask you.

Horny!Gojo assures you with cocky confidence, "Yeah, I could make you cum. Aw, don't give me that eyeroll, it's turning me on. I know for a fucking fact I could make you cum. I could make those eyes roll back. I could make your legs shake."

Horny!Gojo squeezes your hand tightly when he leads you upstairs, and giggles with you as the two of you escape into a quiet, empty bedroom. His heart is panging so hard in his chest. His body feels electric. He's so horny it's the only thing he can focus on.

Horny!Gojo whimpers when you crash your lips into his. He starts making out wildly with you like he's a sex-deprived loser. Because he is. A sex-deprived, touch-starved college boy.

Horny!Gojo hits those deep, hard strokes with no breaks just to destroy you. He never lets up. Never stops to have a breather or lets you catch your own breath. "Working up a sweat b—abyyy? Too much dick stuffing your little cunt? Yeah? Is it too much? Too big? Too deep? Fuck, you're gonna squeeze my dick off, haha, calm down. It's just a little dirty talk."

Horny!Gojo murmurs into your ear, "All I wanna do is make you finish over and over again." desperation and conviction in his voice. He really just wanted to fuck you into bliss, have you dumb on his fat cock, have you squirming and whimpering and going feral for him.

Horny!Gojo pins you down like a beast but also pounds into you like he's the bitch in heat. "Oh my god oh my god yes yes yes fuck fuck fuck fuck fuckkkk that pussy's so fuckin' gooooodddd" he's a mess, just swearing and moaning like a broken record.

Horny!Gojo almost sobs your name into your mouth when he cums, draining every drop of cum that he's worked up for you in the past hour.

Horny!Gojo turns his creampies into whipped cream with his thrusts, smacking his hips so hard into you that you feel his balls slap against your ass. They're so heavy and full, makes you think that if you weren't on birth control you'd definitely get knocked up with just one of his fat nuts.

Horny!Gojo goes round after round, becoming a melting sweaty mess of a man and feeling his muscles tire out. He pins you to the bed with his whole weight, and gives you his all just to show off a little.

Horny!Gojo has such a strained but enthusiastic voice after fucking you into next year with his dick. "Wow... that pussy's so fucking creamy." he grins toothily. A sweat drop beads off his cheek. His bangs are stuck messily to his forehead, some brushed to the side.

Horny!Gojo is insatiable, he calls you long after the party, over and over, shows up at your door and relishes in how his horniness rubs off on you. He's always a giggly mess in bed with you.

Horny!Gojo needs you so bad some days that he comes to you straight after his workout at the gym, no shower just sweaty gym boy abs, and fucks you as a way to "push his limits" for like three hours.

Horny!Gojo needs to cum everywhere he can. It's like he has a cumshot checklist. Thighs? Yes. Tummy? Yes. Ass? Yes. Chest? Yes. Face? Yes. Pussylips? Yes. Hands? Yes. In your panties? Yes.

Horny!Gojo is so fucking cute when he kisses you after sex, nuzzling your neck like a cat and telling you how good you treat him with that five star pussy.

Horny!Gojo jerks himself alone when you can't come over :( always to you, of course. Sexts like a menace. He's a bit too good at it.

Horny!Gojo gets so pussy drunk sometimes that he begs you to become his wife. His dick feels so raw and sensitive but he keeps squeezing it into that tight hole of yours.

Horny!Gojo is obsessed with you, mind body and soul. Just the sight of you and sound of you makes his dick stand up. And then he's whisking you off your feet and frantically throwing you onto the bed, and you're giggling at your horny boyfriend— oh... when did that happen? Hm. Well now he's your boyfriend.

© arminsumi

Do not plagiarize / repost / translate / copy layouts / etc.

Do not steal what I've worked hard to create.

#smut #mdni #gojo #gojo smut #gojo x reader smut #gojo satoru smut #gojo satoru x reader smut #gojo x fem reader smut #gojo x fem reader #gojo x reader #satoru gojo #gojo x you #gojo satoru #gojo saturo #jjk smut #jujutsu kaisen smut #jujutsu gojo #jjk gojo #gojou satoru x reader

[norrussell]

Read to me. | Lando Norris⁴

Pairings: Lando Norris x girlfriend!reader

Summary: after a hard day, Lando knows he can always turn to you for some comfort... And then give something in return

Warnings: fluff with smut hehe

A/N: I tried writing pure fluff and failed. I split it into two though and put another divider so you can finish with the fluff part without having to read the smut if you don't want to :)

The sun had already set when Lando returned home from his day out working with sponsors. He opened the door of your shared bedroom, finding you already in your pajamas, absorbed in a book. Smiling a little, he leaned against the door frame silently watching you, exhaustion thick on his face.

"Hey, baby," you finally took notice of him, glancing up and putting the book down for a moment to softly greet him.

"Hey," he slowly made his way towards the bed, crawling until he snuggled into your lap.

"Long day?" one of your hands immediately tangled into his curls, beginning to massage his scalp. He closed his eyes, groaning in satisfaction.

"You've no idea." he mumbled, relaxing under your touch.

As he rested in your lap, you couldn't help but notice how worn out he looked and it was as if a weight had been lifted off his shoulders the moment he sank into your embrace. You kept working your fingers through his hair, feeling the muscles in his body become increasingly relaxed with each stroke.

"Want to talk about it?" you asked gently, knowing how much he tended to keep to himself when it came to work. He shook his head, burrowing deeper into your lap.

"Not really," he sighed. "Just a lot of meetings, a lot of people trying to get a piece of me. It gets exhausting after a while."

You nodded in understanding, continuing to run your fingers through his locks. The room fell silent, the only sounds the soft hum of the air conditioning and the occasional rustle as you adjusted your position. It was a comfortable silence, one that only came with the familiarity of years spent together.

"How was your day?" you smiled at the question, knowing that Lando always made an effort to ask about you no matter how tired he was.

"It was good," you replied, thinking back to the meetings you had and the progress you made on your latest project. "Productive, but not as eventful as yours."

Lando chuckled, his breath tickling your stomach. "I'll take boring over exhausting any day," he said, his eyes still closed.

The two of you sat in quiet once more - you continuing to read your book and Lando finding interest in his phone - enjoying the comfort of each other's company. Eventually, Lando put his phone down and nestled himself between your legs, his head on your lower abdomen.

"Could you read to me?" he asked, looking up at you with puppy dog eyes. It wasn't unusual question. He often asked you to do so or just talk to him in general cause he loved falling asleep to the sound of your voice.

"Of course." you smiled softly at him, running your hand through his hair once more before grabbing your book and flipping to the page you left off on.

When you began to read, Lando closed his eyes and listened intently to your tone. It was soothing and calming, and he found himself slipping into a peaceful state. He loved how your voice gently lilted up and down, as if the words you read were a lullaby meant only for him.

As you read on, Lando's hands found their way to your sides, tickling you ever so slightly, causing you to giggle. You playfully swatted his hands away, but he persisted, his fingers dancing along your skin.

"You're such a child," you chuckled, but you didn't mind. It was moments like these that made you appreciate how carefree and playful Lando could be.

"You love it," he grinned, his hands still tickling you mercilessly.

You tried to push him away, but he was too quick, his fingers finding every sensitive spot on your body. You couldn't help but laugh, the sound filling the room and mixing with the sound of your voice as you continued reading.

Finally, you managed to catch his hands, holding them still. Lando pouted, but you could see the amusement in his eyes. "I thought you wanted me to read to you?"

"Sorry, I couldn't resist," he said, still grinning.

You rolled your eyes, but couldn't help the smile on your face. "You really are a child," you teased, but your tone was affectionate.

Lando shrugged, his grin still firmly in place. "What can I say? You bring out the playful side in me."

You shook your head, but couldn't help, but feel fondness for the man in your lap. He may have been exhausted from work, but he always managed to find a way to make you laugh and give you attention.

Your reading continued and Lando stilled once more, his breathing becoming slower and more even making you believe he had fallen asleep. However, when you turned to the next page, you heard him let out a soft sigh, his body relaxing even further against you. You smiled at the sound, feeling content with the moment. It was simple, but you found that it was often the simplest moments that brought the most joy.

You leaned down and placed a soft kiss on Lando's forehead, careful so as not to disturb his peace. You knew that he needed his rest and you were happy to just watch him sleep and take in the moment.

But he was not ready to drift off just yet as his fingers started slowly caressing your legs, reaching upwards to the outside of your thighs.

You paused mid sentence, glancing down at Lando to see if he was awake. His eyes were still closed, but his hands continued their slow, deliberate movements up your legs. A shiver ran through you, and you couldn't help the way your breath caught in your throat.

"Lando?" you asked softly, unsure if he was awake or not.

He didn't answer, but his fingertips kept tracing patterns over your skin. He turned over, lightly brushing the tip of his nose over your inner thighs. Your heart skipped a beat as his lips travelled higher and higher up your body, leaving a trail of soft kisses along the way. You could feel the heat building between your legs, and you knew that you were getting wet.

"Lando, what are you doing?" you asked, your voice a mix of surprise and arousal.

"Keep going, baby, keep reading," he continued to kiss his way up, his hands holding your hips steady. You couldn't help, but squirm under his touch, your body already primed for him.

With no other choice, you resumed reading, your voice a bit shaky at the thought of what Lando was going to do to you.

Still teasing, Lando's hands travelled along the inside of your legs, making your lips quiver in response. You struggled to keep reading, the words in front of you starting to blur. With a final flick of his wrist, your panties were gone, and you were completely exposed to him.

"You're doing such a good job, really making me interested in the story..." Lando's voice ghosted over your skin, causing you to shiver.

And before you could turn over the next page, he buried his face between your legs. Your breath hitched as you felt his tongue against your pussy, licking and tasting every inch of you. You threw your head back, panting as his tongue flicked against your clit. He was slow and gentle at first, just teasing you with butterfly kisses. But it wasn't long before his hands grabbed your hips and pulled you closer to him, his mouth closing over you.

"I didn't tell you to stop reading, did I?" he asked, his voice muffled as he spoke. You shook your head, hands crumpling the book cover as you tried to focus on the text before you. "I'll stop if you do."

But he wouldn't let you. Instead, his mouth closed around your clit, sucking on it as his fingers teased your opening. You gasped, your body shuddering as his fingers slipped inside you, teasing you at the same time.

"Fuck, Lando..." you moaned, the pitch of your voice rising.

"Now, babe, I'm pretty sure that isn't part of the text," he teased, pulling his fingers out of you once more.

"No, no," you whimpered, your eyes pleading with him to keep going. He chuckled, the sound vibrating against your sensitive skin.

"Please, Lando," you begged, your voice breathless once more.

"Say it, baby," he said softly, his breath hot against you.

"I'm sorry, please, don't stop," you whispered, knowing what he needed to hear.

"Good girl, such a good girl," he said approvingly before going back to what he was doing.

This time, he didn't tease you. Rather, he pressed his lips firmly over your clit, sucking on it hard. You cried out loudly, your hips bucking wildly as he pressed two fingers deep into your wet, dripping cunt. His fingers worked you fast and hard, curling upwards to tease your g-spot. You could feel your muscles tightening, pleasure radiating through your body as you got closer and closer to the edge.

"Oh, fuck, I'm gonna come," you said breathlessly, your legs shaking as you tried to keep them open for him.

"I didn't tell you to come, did I?" he asked, his fingers still working away at your wet, needy pussy, this time even harder than before.

"No, please, I'm so close..." you trailed off, your body trembling on the brink.

"Beg for it, baby. Tell me how much you want to come. Use your words." he said firmly, his fingers increasing their speed. He knew you were close, and he loved the way your body shook beneath his touch.

"Fuck, I need to come, please, let me come," you whimpered, tossing your head back as you tried to hold on a little longer.

"Oh, really?" he asked, his fingers stilling for a moment. He loved denying you, loved denying you the pleasure you so desperately wanted, especially when you were this close.

"Yes, please, I'm almost there," you begged, your voice tight with arousal as you tried to keep yourself from orgasming.

"You really want to come?" he asked, his fingers stilling completely.

"Yes!"

"I'm not sure that's a part of the story, you know," he smirked, looking up at you.

"Please, Lando," you gasped, the sensations of his touch shaking your body.

"Why should I let you come, baby? What's it going to take?" he asked, his fingers lightly dancing against your clit.

"I don't know, I don't care, just finish what you started," you pleaded, your voice breathless and needy.

"I'll think about it," he teased, his fingers still circling against your clit.

"Lando!" you screamed. You tried to push yourself over the edge, but it was no use. He just wasn't going to let you come.

You bit your lip, doing your best not to cry out in frustration. He removed his fingers, and you could feel the cool air on your wet skin. And before you could turn over another page, his fingers plunged into you once more, his tongue returning to tease your clit.

"I thought I told you to keep reading," he said, his fingers picking up the pace once more.

You tried to focus on the words on the page, but it was no use. It was impossible to focus when he was doing that to you.

"Such a good girl, such a good girl," he murmured. "Come for me, baby, just for me."

And that was all it took, your body breaking over the edge as you came hard against his mouth. Your moans filled the room, his name falling from your lips as you rode out your orgasm.

You slumped back against the pillows, your breathing heavy as you struggled to keep your eyes open. Lando pulled up your panties, his fingers gentle as he ran them over your skin.

"Ready for the next chapter?" he grinned innocently, his lips brushing against your inner thigh.

#lando norris x reader #lando norris x you #lando norris x y/n #lando norris x oc #lando norris x female reader #lando norris imagine #lando norris one shot #lando norris smut #lando norris fanfic #lando norris fluff #lando norris #ln4 x reader #ln4 x you #ln4 imagine #ln4 smut #ln4 fluff #ln4 fic #ln4 #f1 x reader #f1 x you #f1 x y/n #f1 x female reader #f1 x oc #f1 imagine #f1 one shot #f1 smut #f1 fic #f1 fanfic #f1 fluff #formula 1 x reader

[chxrrydrxp]

aftercare with Jason bc he’s so sweet after breaking the bed :((

ugh, thank you for giving me something new to daydream about.

yall these exams are gonna kick my ass next week god help me

(mild spice, mainly sugar sweetness, gender isnt specified, race neutral) mdni

Jason is such a sweetheart

With the rise and fall of your chest, the room was filled with the quiet sounds of you desperately trying to breathe, your hands tightly wrapped around Jason's neck.

Your body trembled as he pulled one last intense orgasm from you. Your voice was rugged and your throat felt desert dry from the strained gasping and pleading he'd elicited from you all night. His thrusts are now slower, but deeper. "f-uck.." he whimpers, emptying himself into you, and then he nips at your earlobe. He leans down to your sweaty forehead and places a kiss there, then more down your cheek. You let out a breathy laugh and reach your hand up to caress his cheek. He grabs ahold of your hand, bringing it up to his cheek anyway, then placing a wet kiss along your knuckles. "You're...so fucking beautiful..." he mutters breathlessly against your hand. "look at you.." he places more kisses across your palm. "How'd I ever get so lucky..." His black hair mostly sticks to his forehead, with the occasional curl tickling your face. You finally found your words, kissing him softly on the lips, and wrapping your arms around his back pulling him down. "I wanna stay like this forever Jay..with you." A tired smile appears on his lips as he slowly pulls out of you, smug at the tremble of your legs from the sensitivity. "Yeah but it'll be a bitch to pee later," he says rubbing your cheek with his thumb mindlessly. You roll your eyes at his obviousness. Leaving you with one last kiss, he reaches over to the bedside for your water bottle, lifting it to your lips to drink. "c'mon, open up." You accept the water with relief, and he partakes in it as well. You lift yourself on your elbows slightly, and then you notice the bed seems to be creaking a lot easier than it did previously, but you don't put much thought into it. Jason goes to the bathroom for a while to clean himself up and comes out with a wet washcloth and wipes, wearing gray sweatpants. "You're not gonna like this part, come on you gotta pee," he says. he kneels at the bedside, scooping you up into his muscular arms bride-style. you groan in pain at the sudden movement . he gently places you on the toilet, and leans against the sink. "Jason did you.. break the bed?" He begins running hot water in the tub. "You're the one who kept telling me to go harder and faster, I don't wanna hear it." you attempted to hide your embarrassment. "I ordered some food for you, it'll be here by the time you finish your bath." you slowly sink into the water, feeling the warmness engulf you and relax your muscles. "How'd you know what I wanted to eat?" you questioned, leaning against the smooth tub. "If I asked you, the stores would all be closed by the time you could make up your mind. trust me you'll like it." you laid back in defeat. he left the bathroom and came back with a book, two candles, and a glass of your favorite wine. you watched in awe. as he filled your favorite glass with the liquid, and sat crisscrossed on the floor beside you. He lit the candles one by one, then handed the glass to you. "for you, my love," he said with a cheeky smile. you accept the glass, your heart pounding in response. how did you get so lucky? meanwhile, he's taking in your form with awe. how the hell did he get so lucky? you both smile mutually, staring into the eyes of the love of your lives. "I love you so much Jay," you mutter, making his heart flutter. he leans over the tub, placing a kiss on your nose. "I'm so in love with you y/n."

#jason todd x reader #jason todd #jason todd smut #ceri drabbles #red hood x reader #NOT EDITED OMG

[yawnderu]

K-9 — Simon "Ghost" Riley x Reader | Part II

Sick as a dog, and just as vicious.

1 2 3 4 5

Simon scores a date with his favorite medic

Or

Simon has to be under her watch after getting a knife to the gut.

"Oi, doc." Simon calls out and you sigh softly, gaze drifting from your patient report to him, his unmasked figure lays on the medical bed, gauze wrapped tightly over his abdomen, keeping his newest injury guarded from anything that could rub on or mess up the stitches.

"Why'd they call you K-9?" One of his thin, eyeblack stained eyebrows lifts as he looks at you, already feeling bored from having to stay still for so long, movement limited by the patched up stab wound on his stomach.

"Long story." You dismiss him, looking back down at the patient report you were writing for him. His medical file was interesting, indicating no pictures of him should ever be taken, as well as additional personal and professional information.

"You got surgery in 2020, what's that about?" You didn't notice any bigger scars whenever he was injured, having already seen his naked torso and part of his legs.

"Curious 'bout me, doc?" His tone is slightly teasing, the smug bastard thinking he's funny by asking that. A single eye roll is enough to get him to speak, a deep, gravelly chuckle escaping his lips before he answers.

"Took a nasty gunshot to the leg, was fadin' fast." He lays back down, gaze drifting towards the ceiling as he thinks about it. He was so close to death himself, only three years ago.

"Thought it'd be more interesting." Your bluntness never fails to make him double take. It's not passive aggressive or mean, just... way too honest. More than he's used to.

"I'll get a proper grand injury just for you, lass." You roll your eyes again, taking a sip from your coffee to hide the way the corners of your lips are tugging up. It's amusing, really, to find out how much Simon has changed throughout the years. Price told you he used to be much more quiet, though after 4 years of working with the task force, he was able to open up, getting more and more used to interacting with a team rather than being a lone wolf.

"That's not necessary, I can give it to you myself if you'd like." Your gloved hand presses on the scalpel on your white coat before going back to writing his medical report, tone laced with subtle humor.

"She can joke." He taunts, trying to sit up before a sharp hiss of pain escapes his lips. You frown, the report taking way too long to finish because you keep getting interrupted.

"Hold on." You walk up to him, hands holding onto his strong back before you try to help the behemoth of a man sit up. His calloused hands hold onto your forearms, a few low, deep groans escaping his lips at the strain his flexing muscles are causing to the fresh injury.

"Fuckin' hell." He mutters and you look up, eyes focusing on his pained expression for a second too long. Simon isn't ugly, really, but when his face is all scrunched up in pain, sweat gathering in the form of clear specks all over his eyeblack stained skin? He looks almost majestic. You get your head out of the gutter, placing some soft pillows behind his back to help keep him up without much strain.

"You should be healed up soon enough, got lucky the bastard didn't stab that deep." You shrug, looking back at the tiny coffee maker in your office before you look back up at him, his brown eyes already staring back at you, pupils blown, as usual.

"Want some coffee?" He shakes his head politely, eyes closing in pain as he tries to get into a more comfortable position.

"A cuppa would be nice." You flick his forehead softly, tired eyes drifting towards the clock on the wall. 0100, yet you simply nod and grab your phone from the desk.

"Try not to die while I'm gone." The door closes behind you before he can reply, brown eyes closing as he sighs when you're gone. He doesn't even know how it all started. Simon is a man of discipline, a soldier, a Ghost, yet the way his heart quickens and his cock hardens whenever he's with you is something he can't control, as if a parasite made home in his brain and is using his body as a vessel, ridding him completely of any self-control.

You come back 10 minutes later, a tray with a cup of hot tea and food placed on his lap, the almost comforting warmth quickly spreading through his legs and body.

"Thank you." He moves the spoon around the cup of Earl Grey, letting the sugar mix in for a hot minute before he takes a sip from it, nodding his head once in approval. He was starving, really, but he tried his best to eat slowly, ignoring his hungry stomach begging him to wolf it all down. His eyes drift back to the tray, attention caught by the singular orange left there.

His hands fumble for one of the knives in his clothes, finding all of the straps were removed by you and placed too far away for his injured body to reach. He looks back up at you, admiring you in silence and truly taking you in. The way you lift your glasses every once in a while even before they can slip down the bridge of your nose, the way your hand fiddles with the pen and your lips turn into a small pout whenever you're not sure how to describe something in the report, the way you look so angelic under the dim lights of the infirmary—

"What are you lookin' at?" You don't even bother looking back at him, feeling his stare on you for the past two minutes. He has such an intense gaze that makes you feel as if he can see through your soul, yet it never intimidated you.

"Nothin', bird, nothin'. Peeled you an orange."

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#cod mw2 #cod mwii #simon ghost riley #ghost mw2 #simon riley #ghost cod #simon riley x you #simon riley imagine #simon riley x reader #simon ghost x reader #ghost x f!reader #ghost x reader #ghost x you #ghost x y/n #ghost x female reader #ghost x medic!reader #medic!reader #mw2 ghost #mw2 x reader #mw2 2022 #mw2 fanfic #mw2 141 #call of duty #cod modern warfare #cod #call of duty mw2 #mw3 x reader #Mw3 ghost #ghost

[dilemmaontwolegs]

Two words (MAX’s THIGHS )🫠🤭

The Real Prize - Thighs || MV1

Warnings: 18+ only, nsfw, thigh riding. WC: ~550

Pre-Gala || The Real Prize ||Jealousy || Panties || Captivity || Rocky || Escaping || Thighs || Consequences || A Mile High

Max kicked his dress shoes off as soon as he walked in the door and tossed his suit jacket onto the coat rack. You had retired to the room earlier knowing he would be kept back late for the formalities. 

“Schatje?” he called out, quietly enough to keep from waking you if you were asleep but loud enough to announce his arrival. 

“In here, baby.” You had just finished relaxing in the bath and wrapped a towel around your body as you stepped into the bedroom to meet him. His white shirt hung open and inviting as he sat on the edge of the bed, sighing to himself after the long hours of socialising. “You look tired.”

“I am tired.” He pulled you between his legs the moment you stepped into his reach and you brushed his shirt off his shoulders. A soft groan fell from his parted lips when you massaged the tension away and the sound made you clench your thighs together. 

“Sit,” he ordered as he tugged the towels away and saw the signs of your arousal, peaked nipples begging for his mouth. 

“But you’re tired,” you murmured hesitantly. 

He shook his head and pushed his knee between your legs, forcing your stance wider as his hands guided your hips down until you were sitting on his thick thigh. “I’ll never be too tired for this.”

Slowly, he began to rock your hips and you moaned at the friction his trousers gave you at the juncture of your thighs. He wasn’t fazed in the slightest that you would likely ruin the expensive bottom half of his Amari suit when you came, he just wanted to see the look of pleasure on your face again. 

“Go on, schat, take what you need,” he encouraged. His hold loosened on your hips and you gripped his shoulders as you rode his thigh. With his hands free, there was nothing stopping them roaming your body. You gasped as he pressed a thumb to your clit and it sparked your cunt to clench as you ground yourself against him. “You’re gonna ride my thigh until you come, aren’t you, my good girl?”

“Mmm yes…” you whined as you laced your fingers in his hair, tugging his face down to your chest until he sealed his lips around your nipple. “Yes, oh god, Max.”

“That’s it, schatje, keep going, you’re doing so well.”

Your hips rode the hard length of his thigh, feeling each strap of muscle that was hidden beneath the dark fabric he wore. You rode him harder as the pressure in your abdomen grew and your head fell back with a cry of delight. “Maaxxxx…I’m, I’m…fuck!” 

Your orgasm washed over you in waves that shook your body and each twitch ignited aftershocks as the cotton teased your already stimulated nerve endings. 

“You’re so fucking beautiful when you come,” he praised. His large hand cradled your head to his shoulder as you sagged into his embrace to recover. 

“I ruined your trousers.”

He chuckled as you climbed off him with unsteady legs and saw your arousal thick on the material. 

“So did I.”

You looked further up his thigh and giggled as you found another damp patch. “I really did good, huh?”

“Mmm, the best,” he hummed as he fell back on the bed with a contented sigh. “Now I’m very tired.”

#max verstappen fic #max verstappen imagine #max verstappen smut #max verstappen fanfic #f1 imagine #f1 fanfic #formula one imagine #formula 1 fanfic #formula one fanfiction #formula one smut #f1 smut #max verstappen x reader #max verstappen x you

[nomercyanywhere]

teasing toji whenever he workouts lmao

ー ー ー ー ー

he'd sit down, lifting weights while you're on your knees before him and in between his legs, sniffing his hot clothed cock and nibbling on it through the fabric.

you feel his panting on your forehead, hot and tired. you look up at his sweaty muscles and lick them gleefully. "you seem to be enjoying this. " his voice stern and serious, you just flashed him a smirk and pulled down his pants. his pubes were wet, probably from the sweat, and his musk just filling your nose, while you kiss his sweaty dick. "mhm.. you taste so good daddy. " you licked his cock like a kitten then looked up at his annoyed expression. what a fucking brat.

during hip thrusts, you'd sit on top of him and grind on his cock, the grey sweatpants he always wore would show his dick imprint all the time and you couldn't endure it anymore.

he heard your footsteps and mentally prepared for what you were about to do. when it stopped, he raised his head and is greeted by you wearing only his massive shirt and no underwear, your throbbing cunt begged for his touch. you positioned yourself on his dick, then lifted the shirt abit while also facing him, giving him a clear view of your soppy cunt. when you finally sat on him, his thrusts upward would cause his clothed cock to rub your bare clit. "sorry... wanted to ride your cock so bad.." you slowly buck your hips when you felt him stop. he had just finished and wanted to tend to his needy boy "yeah? you horny baby? want my cock~? ."

whenever he'd do planks, you'd lay under him while being on your tummy and rub your ass against his cock.

you know he can hold a plank for an hour or two, and you were horny so, you'd get under him and rub you bare ass on his growing hardon. his sweat would fall on you and his shaky breath tickled your nape. "d'you like this? hm?" the tone of your voice was infuriating to him, he's trying to focus and you're playing with his dick.. he sighed loudly and laid on top of you. his entire weight on you. "what the- toji i cant breathe!" "bear with it. if i can handle your teasing you should be able to handle mine." both his muscular arms wrapped around you and his dick pressing your butt. "is this even teasing -?!"

ー ー ー ー ー

a/n: guys i dont rlly like this one

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk smut #jjk imagines #toji fushiguro smut #toji thirst #toji smut #ftm reader #m! reader #male reader #nomercyanywhereliterature

[leebitofficial]

look!

fluff , dad!minho x reader

your muscles ached as you finally stepped foot inside your home after what felt like months. minho followed behind, gently carrying the carseat that held the newest addition to your family. he was being extremely cautious, careful not to wake her by accidentally hitting the car seat against the doorframe or carrying it so close to his legs that he hits it himself.

you needed a nap. bad. minho was more than willing to let that happen. just one tiny problem.

the nursery wasn’t completely finished yet.

your little girl had decided to come a little earlier than expected so you and minho hadn’t yet finished putting some of the furniture together. he could call chan for help, but that was too much of a hassle. all minho wanted at the moment was to be alone with his new little family.

when you had called minho at 2:30 in the afternoon on a wednesday while he was at practice to tell him that your water broke all over your brand new rug in the living room, he nearly drowned while taking a sip of his water.

he didn’t waste a single second in getting home to you.

you were in the hospital for what felt like forever. labor and delivery went quickly, but the doctors insisted on extra examination due to the fact that your baby girl was three and a half weeks early.

luckily everything was normal, though, your baby was completely healthy and so were you.

finally you and your little girl were cleared to go home, and now here you were, standing in your living room worrying about how you we’re gonna clean the rug while minho carried in your belongings, and of course the baby.

he gently places the carseat down on the floor in front of you.

“i’ll go grab the bassinet so i can build it while you sit with her. will you be okay? i’ll be quick.” he inquires.

you smile up at him from where you’ve sat on the floor next to your little one. “i’ll be okay, min.”

he nods and shuffles out the room quickly, and suddenly the cats are swarming you.

“hi babies! i missed you!” you coo at them as you hold one hand on the carseat in an attempt to be closer to your baby without waking her.

the three of them collectively sniff the carseat, and then the baby. they must be wondering who this new little person is that happens to smell like you and minho.

you pray that they don’t wake her up. she seems to not cry much overall, which you’re grateful for, but she needs the sleep after the long night you had of trying to feed her.

“okay, i’m back!” minho announces as he enters the room with the large box containing the pieces to the bassinet.

“min! look!” you say, waving him over as he whips his head around to look at you.

“oh-” he gasps.

he gently sets down everything in his hands to sit next to you and watch what’s unfolding before his eyes.

soonie rubs his head against the baby’s tiny feet while the other two continue to sniff around.

it was a precious sight. minho definitely didn’t tear up a bit. (yes he did)

suddenly you hear tiny whines and whimpers coming from your little girl as she wakes, kicking her feet around slightly.

“oh oh oh- no, shoo!” minho waves the cats away.

the cats scramble and minho rests his chin on your shoulder as you attempt to calm your sleepy baby. you wouldn’t be happy if a cat woke you from your nap either.

her irritation subsided and she was calm again, tiny fists flailing like she wanted out of her seat.

“i’ll take her. you’re tired, take a nap.” he insists.

“but min- the bassinet.” you remind him.

“i know, i know, i’ll take care of it, don’t worry.” he reassures, gently grabbing your baby girl from your hands and softly placing her against his chest.

“are you sure?” you ask, a part of you not wanting to leave yet.

“i promise.” he whispers as he places a couple very soft kisses along your temple.

you stand up and stare down at your lover holding what’s possibly the most precious thing the two of you could create as he coos at her and her tiny hands.

and as you fall asleep that sweet afternoon, minho works tirelessly with only one free hand to finish building all the things you could possibly need for your baby. and not once did she stir in the safe hold of her father.

a/n: my mimo 😞 i love him so terribly

#skz fluff #skz scenarios #stray kids #stray kids fluff #stray kids x reader #lee know #skz x reader #lee know x reader #lee know fluff #skz lee know

[buckyalpine]

Bucky feral over pregnant reader

Pure pregnancy fluff and filth. This was meant to be pure fluff and then as usual, I got carried away, idk why I decided to make it this dirty. 

I can’t get over Bucky being obsessed with you carrying his baby. Yes he’s excited to be a dad but there’s something about the fact that it’s you. You’re pregnant because of him, it’s his little one in your perfect belly. Every tiny change he notices in your body makes him swoon from, from your swollen achy feet to your tender breasts, and your slightly plumper cheeks. 

He fucking loves it. 

Your his baby mama and nothing else matters, he’s so proud and in love with you. The swell of your tummy makes his heart beat faster, and the more it grows, the more irresistible he finds you.

“You’re carrying my baby” he coos, wrapping his hands around your tummy while you stand in the kitchen grabbing a snack. He’s happy to cradle the little bump in his arms, easing some of the tension from your back, doing anything to help you feel better. He’s such a lovesick puppy, always looking at you with heart eyes and it doesn’t go unnoticed by the rest of the team. 

“Look, he’s going it again” Sam whispered to Steve, the both of them watching Bucky watching you flit around the kitchen with his chin resting on his hands, sighing, enamored with how pretty you are with your cute little waddle. 

“Does he plan on moving any time soon?”

“Nope” 

Bucky is so busy admiring you, he doesn’t realize the team has started timing records for how long he just sits and watches because they find it utterly and disgustingly adorable. 

He wants to make love to you the entire time, every hour if possible but mama also needs her rest so he doesn’t try to tire you out. That doesn’t mean he keeps his hands to himself, especially when you’re extra hormonal and needy. 

“I got you, mama” He soothes you, pulling your soaked cotton panties off and pulling up your oversized shirt over your belly, his hands gently holding onto your hips and he pushes himself inside. He loves this position with your thighs spread apart, belly on full display, watching your face contort with pleasure, watching his cock thrust in and out of your dripping cunt.

It takes everything in him not to cum instantly, fucking his pretty, very pregnant girl, knowing he knocked her up, it’s his cum that has her all round and perfect, their love making that’s giving him a family. 

“Fuck mama, m’gonna cum” He can’t help the whine and whimper of his voice, muscles tensed from trying to hold back but he can’t, your body is so warm and soft, “S’too much, balls feel to heavy, you make my cock so sensitive, s’all fucked up, I can’t-f-fuuckk” His hips stutter and he’s  spilling ropes of his creamy spend into you, already thinking of getting you pregnant immediately after. 

He can’t resist you even when you’re asleep. 

“Jamie” you whine, your futile protests turning into a needy moan when you feel his tongue brush over your clit, his head between your legs, the time on the clock 1:15AM. 

“Please mama? Wanna make you feel good pretty baby, you deserve it” He just had to get a taste and he doesn’t relent till his beard is soaked and your a shaky, trembling mess. He suckles and nurses off your clit like it’s keeping him alive, pumping his fingers in and out of you till your eyes roll all the way back and your voice is cracking from screaming. 

Your pregnancy has made him down right filthy and feral. Like when you finished up your shower, wrapped in nothing but a towel that barely covered anything. Bucky was sitting on the bed with a book in his hands, the story now long forgotten when he sees you sitting by the vanity, applying your lotion. You let the towel drop to the floor, now bare naked while rubbing silky cream onto your sensitive skin. 

“Fuck, y’can’t do that doll” Bucky groans, his eyes trailing to your peaked buds down to your stretch marks and plush thighs, the soft rolls of your back making him feral, something he desperately wants to grab and squeeze them in his hands. “Let me help you, mama” 

He’s about to set his book down but you can’t help but tease him, shaking your head instead. 

“Y’know I can do this myself baby, I need to move around, doctors orders” 

He knows you’re right but that doesn’t stop all his blood rushing down to his now aching cock, screaming for attention. He palms himself, hoping it’d be enough to calm down but nope. You start to massage your swollen breasts, the smirk on your face shows you know what your doing. His cock ends up in his hand, book thrown aside, chest heaving up and down. 

“Fuck, m’so hard” He moans, stroking himself while you giggle, continuing with your routine. “S’not fair babygirl, makes my cock hurt when you look so pretty like that” 

He’s careful to use slow, languid strokes because any tighter and he’d cum all over his fist. At some point his metal hand cups his balls because his body feels too hot and they’re so fucking full. He could cum just from watching you but he’s more greedy than ever. 

“Mama. c’mere, please” he pleads with glassy eyes between moans, struggling to keep his eyes open. 

“Need something Jamie?” You coo, your perfect naked form causing spurts of precum to shoot from his tip while you saunter over to him, removing his hand from his cock and pulling him to stand up. He’s about to ask what you’re doing, stuttering when you bite your lip. 

“Oh god, fuck, no, you-you can’t-” He chokes out while you sink to your knees, taking the head  of his cock in your mouth, swirling your tongue around. He sobs at how angelic you look, your breasts heavier than ever, tummy nearly touching the floor. You’re a whole Goddess, on your knees, sucking his dick, pregnant with his baby, Bucky swears he’s died and gone to heaven. 

“Fuck, A-angel, don’t do this to me, m’gonna cum so much, feels too good, you’re so pretty” He cups your cheeks with softly, whining when you pull of him with a pop, his arousal making your lips and chin glossy, dribbling down your neck. 

“Go on daddy, mark me” You smirk while he furiously jerks his cock above your face, cursing under his breath, his cock swelling in his fist. He feels his balls pull tight to his body, his heavy length leaking and already dripping on your face. 

“OH GOD” He nearly roars, coating your entire face with his warm, sticky spend. “FUCK YES” he lets the last few drops fall onto your belly, your body perfectly covered in him. He kisses it all off with sloppy kisses, hard again with him minutes, this time filling your perfect pussy up instead. 

By the time he’s done, you need to shower again anyway, which he’s perfectly happy with, this time excited to join you. 

“C’mon mama, lets get you cleaned up again” 

Sorry. 

#bucky x pregnant reader #bucky x pregnant!reader #James Buchanan Bucky Barnes #Bucky Barnes #james bucky barnes #bucky #bucky barnes x fluff #bucky barnes pregnancy kink #bucky barnes pregnancy fluff #bucky barnes x freader #Bucky Barnes x f!reader #Bucky Barnes x female reader #Bucky Barnes x F Reader #bucky x f!reader #bucky x f reader #bucky x fluff #bucky x Female Reader #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky barnes fan fic #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes x reader smut #bucky barnes x pregnant reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes breeding kink #bucky x smut #bucky x you #bucky x reader #bucky fanfic #bucky fan fiction #bucky fan fic

[moonstruckme]

you’re carrying the poly!marauders girlies out here on tumbler rn with all of these writings of yours! could i request some aftercare with the marauders where they’re rly sweet and gentle with a tired reader plz? if not i get it i love your fics <3

Haha thanks lovely! I wouldn't even know about the concept of poly!marauders if not for all the spectacular fics I've read on here, so happy to further the cause. And of course you can! :)

cw: an itty bitty portion of this is smutty and there's definitely plenty implied, so mdni (?) just to be safe

poly!marauders x fem!reader ♡ 863 words

You collapse onto James’ chest, your skin hot and sweaty where it meets his. The only sound in the room is panting, Sirius and Remus having finished just a minute before the two of you. 

“Let’s just go to sleep here,” you mumble into James’ neck, at the peak of contentment with his dick softening inside you and his hand coming up to cup the back of your head. His chuckle rumbles through you as he kisses your cheek, your shoulder. You don’t think you’ve ever been so tired. 

“Wish we could, but I don’t think that’s gonna work, m’love,” he murmurs in reply, and sure enough, you hear the shifting of sheets as Sirius and Remus recover. 

You let your eyes slip shut anyways, hoping to get whatever rest you can and maybe a little in denial. You’re barely conscious of the quiet footfalls of your boyfriends as they approach, but you notice when a cool hand moves the sweat-damp hair from your face. 

“Tired, love?” Comes Remus’ gentlest tone. 

“Mhm.” 

“Aw, Prongs, you’ve really tuckered our poor angel out.” Sirius’ voice is teasing, and you feel James shift as he leans up for a kiss. Normally you’d be envious and raise your head for a kiss of your own, but you can’t muster the energy. “C’mon, sweetheart, let’s go get cleaned up.” 

You sigh, and it sounds as whiny and exhausted as you feel. You’ll worry about your dignity tomorrow. “You go. M’gonna sleep here.” 

There’s a beat of silence, and you can practically feel Sirius’ sympathetic pout, probably making his case to Remus on your behalf. Then there are hands on your hips, and James’ cock slips out of you as you’re lifted off the bed. 

“You don’t want to sleep in all that, honey,” Remus says, setting you on your feet. Your legs tremble underneath you, thoroughly worn out after the ride you’ve had on James just a minute before. “It won’t take long, and then we can all go to bed after.” 

Sirius has disappeared into the bathroom, and James gets out of bed once he spots the tremor in your knees. “I got you, angel,” he says chivalrously, taking a good portion of your weight with an arm under your shoulders. “Seems like the least I can do.” He winks. The two of you follow Remus into the bathroom, and you’re reminded of how grateful you are that James comes from money, because he’s the only one with a shower big enough to fit all of you. 

SIrius is already inside and James passes you off to him, going to fetch towels. The hot water doesn’t lessen your drowsiness, and Sirius has to brace himself against the wall as you melt against him. “Easy, sweetheart,” he laughs. “We’re not all athletes made of pure muscle.” 

“Sorry,” you say sheepishly, moving to lean on the wall beside him. 

“Our good girl,” he coos, gripping you with a hand around your waist to ensure you don’t slip. Remus and James are lathering themselves in soap beside you, the steamy air filling with the scent of lavender and eucalyptus. “Riding cowgirl isn’t so easy, hm?”

“I don’t think my legs will ever recover.” 

Sirius’ grin is wolfish. “I’ll massage them for you, baby.” 

James snorts, and you roll your droopy eyes. “Thanks.” 

Remus has finished rinsing off, and his skin slides against yours as he wraps his arm around your back. “Pads, love, wash off. I’ve got her.” 

Sirius slips free of you, joining James under the stream of hot water. Remus lathers some soap in his hands and grabs a washcloth, gentle but thorough as he removes the sweat and slick from your breasts, your stomach, your thighs. You whimper softly as the cloth brushes your cunt, and Remus’ grip tightens slightly around your waist. 

“I know, love,” he murmurs. “You’re alright. Not too sore, are you?”

“No, just sensitive.”

He hums, thumb stroking comfortingly on your back. 

Remus is right; it’s only a few minutes before you’re all emerging from the shower smelling far nicer and feeling far less sticky than when you went in. You miss the hot water for only a moment before James is wrapping you in a towel, a matching one slung around his waist. Remus slips out of the bathroom to change the bedsheets while you stay in the steam with James and Sirius, both boys letting you brush their hair out for them before Sirius does yours, working the tangles free with a gentle hand. When Remus tells you all the bed is ready, you’re eager to slip on one of James’ t-shirts and into the soft sheets, your eyes closing before your head hits the pillow. Sirius rubs up and down your back as he settles in behind you, and it’s all you can do to hum lazily in thanks. 

Even he seems too tired to make fun of your lethargy, and the room is silent but for the sounds of quiet breathing once again. 

“I love you all,” you murmur into the darkness, and you fall asleep before you can hear anything else, but you know they say it back.

#poly!marauders #poly!marauders x reader #poly!marauders smut #poly!marauders fluff #poly!marauders fanfiction #poly!marauders fic #poly!marauders fanfic #poly!marauders imagine #poly!marauders x you #poly!marauders x y/n #poly!marauders drabble #poly!marauders oneshot #remus lupin #remus lupin x reader #dom!remus lupin #dom!marauders #sirius black #sirius black x reader #james potter #james potter x reader #wolfstar x reader #marauders x reader #marauders fanfic #marauders fanfiction #marauders fic #marauders era #the marauders #marauders

[rachalixie]

a/n: training minho to reach for you when he is hurt instead of being an angry little guy (inspired by this racha log clip)

you’ve seen it a few times now - minho stubbing his fragile toe against a corner and freezing, or bumping his elbow on a table and hissing slowly through his breath, his eyes closed and his head thrown back as if he is trying to control himself from combusting. him curling up on the couch with his legs pressed close to his chest, hands looking impossibly small where they’re clasped around his knees to hold them close, a deep scowl on his face completing the picture.

he seems angry to the average person, like he’s somehow mad about being hurt and is stewing in that fury while the pangs of pain evaporate from his system. you know better, though. you know he’s not angry, but frustrated. a little annoyed at himself because all he wants to do is curl up in someone’s arms and have them kiss his wound better like a tiny little kitten, but he can’t do that. because he’s minho, and minho’s complete brand is acting tough. sure, everyone knows hes a pure softie on the inside, but he can’t really go around showing it can he?

you’ve elected to convince him that he can. 

it starts when his morning coffee splashes on the back of his hand and he hisses, glaring down at his hand like he wanted to chop it off (or something else equally as violent). usually you’d let him calm down on his own, knowing his faux anger goes as quickly as it comes, but today you swoop into his space and cradle his hand in both of yours. you press a gentle kiss to the spot, coffee staining your lips as you meet his eyes warmly. you guide his hand to the sink and let cool water run across it, rubbing your thumb against his skin in what you hoped was a comforting way. 

“okay?” you ask once you’re satisfied with the temperature of his skin, wrapping a fluffy towel around his hand to dry it. he just blinks at you for a moment, head tilted so adorably that you feel a scream bubbling under your chest that you have to contain. he’s so cute. you finish making his coffee for him while he continues to stare at you with wide eyes, not faltering once until you press a kiss to his cheek on your way out of the kitchen. 

the second time is when he’s come home from dance practice, a little sweaty and tired and very sore all over. he’s grumbling about his muscles hurting under his breath and you can barely hear it, but you know him well enough to know that his aborted movements and sharp little exhales mean that he’s in pain and doesn’t want to say it. the way he sat himself on the sofa instead of showering first was also a sign - he liked to be clean, especially before relaxing. 

you wince in sympathy, knowing the exact feeling of muscle pain from exercise and while it comes with the benefit of self-satisfaction it almost isn’t worth the all-encompassing ache that comes right after. he reaches for his water but stops halfway, cringing at the stretch in both his arm and his abdomen, and falls back against the couch in defeat. you take pity on him, picking up his water and twisting open the cap for him, even going as far as to hold it up to his lips for him as he takes in greedy gulps. when he’s satisfied, he pulls back and fixes you with a suspicious look, like he’s asking what do you want with his eyes. 

you just smile at him in return, giving his upper arms a gentle massage with your hands as you lean at an awkward angle to press a flutter of kisses to his stomach. he’s a little dazed when you finish your ritual, melted back into the cushions with a glazed over look in his eyes, and you cuddle up next to him with a satisfied smile. 

“better?” you ask, letting your finger trail over his stomach in the pattern your lips had just made.

“yeah,” he breathes out, brow furrowing a little in confusion, thinking too hard. 

the third instance is perhaps the most challenging, because it happens in public. the street you’re walking down hand in hand isn’t the busiest, but there are bustling around corners and crossing streets. you’re not at all surprised when minho straightens up in excitement and pulls you to a tree at the end of a sidewalk, a tiny bundle of fur curled up underneath it. minho pulls out a little tube of cat treats from his jacket pocket, something he seems to have an endless supply of, and kneels down next to the small kitten.

the thing is, cats love minho. everyone knows that they do, it’s in his blood. you’re sure that he has cat genes somewhere in his ancestry. 

but, as the both of you discover, this particular cat does not love minho. he leans towards the poor thing, making soft noises with his mouth as he holds the opened treats out, and the cat lets out an angry hiss and swipes at him with its little paw. he lets out a yelp, falling back on his haunches in surprise and his betrayed gaze trails after the kitten as it scampers away. 

he raises the palm of his face to his hand, decorated with lines of angry red that don’t look too bad but you know they probably sting something fierce. he leaves the cat treats abandoned under the tree as he stands and you prepare yourself for the anger to set in but - it doesn’t come. instead, he looks up at you with wet, wide eyes and a trembling pout and your composure breaks.

you swoop in beside him and take his hand, blowing lightly onto his palm before pressing a light kiss to the corner of it. he rests his head on your shoulder in an uncharacteristic display of public skinship, not caring one bit of the passersby behind the both of you as he soaks in your comfort. you have to hide your shock - you didn’t have to come to him, he asked for you. he sought you out in his pain, didn’t get adorably angry, and leaned towards you. this wound was different, this one was personal, a betrayal of his brethren creating a mix of physical and emotional pain that  served as the perfect opportunity for your conditioning to run its course. 

with the way it’s going, you’ll have him perfectly trained in no time.

#stray kids imagines #stray kids fluff #stray kids #skz fluff #lee know imagines #lee know fluff #lee minho fluff #stray kids drabbles #stray kids hurt/comfort

[starlettechild]

𝒜 𝒟𝑒𝓋𝒾𝓁’𝓈 𝒮𝓌𝑒𝑒𝓉-𝓉𝑜𝑜𝓉𝒽

তততততততততততত

CONTENT: NSFW! 18+ only please! Smut involving reader with an implied female anatomy, but they/them pronouns are used through out.

⚠️TW⚠️: NSFW content, obsessive Raphael.

INTRO: After receiving a taste of Tav from Haarlep abusing their form, Raphael can’t get enough. His sweet-tooth begins to crave the real thing.

A/N: I just know Raphael lives in between Tavs thighs. You’ll have to pull that man by the HORNS to get him to stop.

Haarlep begins to wonder if Raphael has gone into some sort of infernal rut. Ever since his favorite adventurer broke into his home and indulged with Haarlep, Raphael has been attached to them. Their form has been Tav for days, and they wonder if the mouse will march to this cursed manor and kill the two of them on the spot for those constant ghost touches. Haarlep knows Tav must be clenching every muscle in their body now, as Raphael buries his head between their thighs. It’s been hours, and Raphael is still licking, sucking, kissing, and biting. It’s enough to make a being as experienced as Haarlep overstimulated. They ball their fists into the sheets. It’s been centuries since Raphael indulged like this. They’ve never seen the devil make such a mess of himself between the thighs of their favorite adventurer.

The first time, Raphael finished untouched just at the mere taste of them! And it’s not even the real thing! But hells, how he groaned, tensed, and gripped their thighs as he finished untouched. If Haarlep didn’t hate him so much, they could almost be aroused by his desperation. The indents of his fingerprints lasted days, and they hoped Tav could see the devils face as he drank them like an exotic whiskey. As if he had been starved - on the brink of death - but the mere taste of Tav on his tongue brought him back to life.

Haarlep bites the hand they use to cover the noises they make as yet another orgasm washes over their illusion body. Raphael insisted Haarlep kept quiet, saying he wouldn’t hear a sound from them, not if it wasn’t the real Tav crying out. But the incubus can see the tent in his pants at the muffled noises, and he’s never stopped them from making those choked cries. Poor Tav, they must be absolutely exhausted with the devils constant feasting.

Raphaels head lifts from in between their legs, loose strands of the usually perfect hair fall stray in-front of his face, the brown eyes burn with pure hunger into the fake face of Tav. Their juices gleam on the devils managed stubble, highlighted by the dim candlelight. Raphael uses his hand to clean his chin and mouth, licking his fingers clean. “Our Tav must be tired. They may not survive if you start feasting again.” Haarlep says to the heavy-breathing devil, and he sees Raphael’s eyes darken at the reminder Tav can feel every single one of his touches. Those dark eyes narrow slightly in consideration. “Perhaps they will make their way to this refuge then, and seek the real thing for relief.” The devils warm breath fans over their entrance, and it makes them want to close their thighs in sensitivity. The corners of Raphaels mouth twitch up. He longs to see Tav this sensitive from his tongue, for his scalp to be sore from how hard they pulled on the strands.

But Haarlep knows the devil better than that. His statement may be coy and teasing, but they can see the true desperation in his brown eyes. How badly he wants them to come to him, to allow him to taste them in their true form. The incubus worries that Raphael wouldn’t let them go after they allowed him to feast. They also worry about Raphael’s humility. Who knows how fast that devil will finish untouched if it was truly the real Tav? He had to bite the inside of their thighs to stop himself from moaning into their entrance as he came undone while tasting them. The mark stayed there for days, adorned by his fingerprints.

The devil, still painfully hard, curls up next to Haarlep. They’ve offered several times to relieve him, but he surprised the incubus when he ripped their hand away, refusing to finish until it was the true Tav he had. A masochistic characteristic, but Haarlep was none to question him. Raphael shuts his eyes tightly, his breathing still heavy and needy against Tavs neck. It takes him awhile to simmer down after these long feasts, and sometimes he gives up in a fit of rage, starting all over again.

Raphael’s mind is filled with thoughts of Tav. Their scent on every inch of his body. His mouth tasting of them. And he fantasized about his long wait finally over, wondering when Tav will visit the den of the lion, willingly heading into its jaws.

তততততততততততত

#raphael bg3 #raphael x tav #raphael smut #raphael bg3 smut #bg3 smut #bg3 writing #raphael #bg3 fanfiction #raphael x durge #haarlep #he so fine.. i won’t heem…

[sunkissed-zegras]

helping them undress as they tiredly tell you their day in brief

maybe with nico?

𝐬𝐥𝐞𝐞𝐩𝐲 | nh¹³

♡ ─ word count | 937

♡ ─ warnings | hurt/comfort?? nico being tired, but just overall fluff content

♡ ─ ev's notes | I LOVE NICO SO MUCHHHH UGH :(

Nico's expression was tired as he stumbled into his living room, throwing his bag across the room. It had been another tiring practice and he felt like he was about to pass out from exhaustion. Not only was practice long and demanding, he barely got any sleep last night and he could not figure why.

He heard the TV and looked on the couch, where you were sitting waiting for him to come home. You turned around at the sound of the door opening and got up happily, a warm smile on your face. Even with his exhaustion, Nico's lips curved up into a smile once he saw you.

"Hey baby!" Your warm voice soothed him immediately as he wrapped his arms around you in an embrace. You could feel how stressed he was just by hugging him, you rubbed his back silently as you both stood there. "You tired?"

Nico let out a tired sigh as he leaned his head against your shoulder, relishing in the comfort of your embrace. "Exhausted," he admitted, his voice muffled against your shirt. "I don't know what's up with me. I just couldn't sleep last night."

You ran your fingers through his hair, understanding evident in your touch. "I'm sorry to hear that, love," you murmured sympathetically. "Maybe it's just stress catching up with you. You've been pushing yourself so hard lately."

Nico nodded, his eyes closing briefly as he let your words sink in. "Yeah, maybe," he agreed softly. "I just... I don't want to let anyone down, you know? There's so much pressure, and I feel like I have to be at the top of my game all the time."

You squeezed him tighter. "You don't have to do it alone, Nico," you reassured him, your voice filled with love. "I'm here for you, no matter what. And I know the team is, too. You're not in this alone."

Nico nodded against your shoulder, his grip tightening a bit before he finally let go. "Yeah, it was a rough one today."

"I know but it's okay, you just need some sleep and it'll be fine." Your warm voice had soothed him as he nodded slowly. "Now come on, let's get you out of those sweaty clothes and into bed. You need some rest."

He nodded as he let you lead him to his room. He sat on the bed as you walked up in between his legs, his hands on your hips as you looked down at his warm brown eyes. You helped him take off his shirt and he let out a tired sigh as the fabric slipped off his shoulders, his muscles relaxing a fraction under your gentle touch.

As the shirt fell to the floor, you couldn't help but admire the lines of his tired face, the determination that still flickered in his eyes despite the weariness that clouded them. "You've been working so hard," you murmured, your voice laced with concern.

Nico met your gaze, a faint smile playing at the corners of his lips. "I have to," he replied softly, his voice tinged with resignation. "I want to be my best, for myself and for the team."

You nodded in understanding, your fingers trailing lightly along his jawline, soothing away the tension you found there. "And you are," you assured him, your voice unwavering. "But even the best need rest, Nico. You can't keep pushing yourself like this."

He sighed, leaning into your touch as if seeking comfort in your words. "I know," he admitted, his voice tinged with vulnerability. "I just... I don't want to let anyone down."

Your heart ached at the raw honesty in his words, the weight of his responsibilities pressing down on him like a heavy burden. "You won't," you promised, your voice firm.

"Thank you," he murmured, his voice laced with exhaustion yet filled with appreciation. As you finished undressing him, he couldn't help but admire the kindness in your eyes.

Once he was in more comfortable clothes, you guided him under the covers. Nico settled into the softness of the mattress, exhaustion weighing heavily on him. You joined him, sitting on the edge of the bed and running your fingers through his hair.

"I wish I knew why I couldn't sleep," Nico confessed, his voice a mixture of frustration and fatigue. "It's like my mind just won't shut off."

You continued to stroke his hair, "sometimes it happens, love."

"You sleepin' here tonight?" Nico yawned as he blinked up at you, his under eyes dark with exhaustion.

You smiled down at him, a reassuring glint in your eyes. "Of course, I am. Right by your side," you replied. "I'll make sure you get a good night's sleep."

You let Nico close his eyes as you got under the covers with him, the warm enveloping you. As soon as you laid down, Nico's arms found you and pulled you even closer. His touch was gentle but somehow possessive, seeking reassurance that you were there with him.

Wrapped in the cocoon of warmth, you nestled against him, feeling the steady rise and fall of his chest. The room was filled with a quiet calmness as the two of you found solace in each other's company.

"Thank you," Nico mumbled, his voice soft and drowsy.

You pressed a tender kiss to his forehead. "No need to thank me. We take care of each other, right?"

Nico nodded, a faint smile playing on his lips. "Right," he whispered, his exhaustion making his words even more endearing. "I love you." Nico muttered and your heart swelled.

"I love you too, Nico."

-> make sure to check out my navigation or masterlist if you enjoyed! any interaction is greatly appreciated! <-

thank you for reading all the way through, as always ♡

#nhl #nhl imagine #nhl fic #hockey #nhl oneshot #nhl fanfiction #hockey fic #❀ evangeline's 1k celly!!⋆ ˚｡⋆౨ৎ˚ #nico hischier blurb #nico hischer imagine #nico hischier smut #nico hischier imagine #nico hischier #nico hischer x reader #nico hischier x you #nico hischier x reader #nico hischier x y/n #nico hischier x oc

[reveluving]

morning, mrs price ; john price x reader

summary: mornings are better with john.

warnings: implied s~mut (minors DNI!), loads of fluff & kisses!

a/n: unplanned. domesticity today is cranked up by a 100 because I woke up on the GOOD side of the bed today, and I hope you will too! please enjoy & don’t forget to leave some sugar! ᐠ( ᐛ )ᐟ

» curious about my writing? come & check out my COD m.list!

☕️ price melting when you come up from behind as he reads the newspaper in the dining room, feeling your hands lightly massaging his shoulders before leaving a few kisses on his temple and cheek, followed by a warm and tired, "g'morning."

☕️ he loves it when you're extra lovey-dovey—when you nuzzle your cheek against his, hearing your soft laugh as his beard tickles and almost prickles against your face.

☕️ he loves it when you hook your chin over his shoulder, asking if there was anything interesting in the paper he was reading. there's likely nothing worth noting half the time, but for you, he'd flip through a few, just to hear your cute "oh!" or if it so happens to be a funny one, being the one to share laugh with you.

☕️ + turning his head to the side to kiss your cheek!

☕️ him casually dragging a chair closer to him with one hand (those arms!), your hot drink of choice (likely prepared by him when he knows you're about to wake up) already next to his own mug to start the day off well together!

☕️ putting the newspaper aside as you sit next to him, talking about whatever with one of his hands on your thigh. it can be innocent, it can be naughty, but chances are, you're never going to leave the dining room right away.

☕️ him trailing his fingers over the visible bite marks on your thighs, his eyes crinkling shamelessly, because how could he forget when the two of you were 'fooling around' last night?

☕️ him purposely jiggling the plush of your thigh and leaning in, complimenting your obedience from last night and whispering how it wouldn't be the last time leaving such marks on you, as if he hasn't done so countless of times.

☕️ price letting out a hearty laugh when you lightly shove him for his teasing, then to ensure you don't pass out of embarrassment, by the way your body was growing hot, he asks what you'd want for breakfast.

☕️ want to try and make a recipe you found on the internet? he's ready to help you, or, if you want to spoil him by making it on your own while telling him to just 'sit there and look handsome', he'll be the most good-looking husband for you.

☕️ hell, he'll flex his muscles for you if you want.

☕️ want to try out that diner you saw the other day? give him a few minutes to finish his coffee then change, and he'll drive you there!

☕️ but shit, if you said you wanted him for breakfast right then and there, then don't be surprised if he spreads his legs without question 💗

˚ · . f i n . · ˚

» a/n: okay AND because I read the ask I sent to @bubuslutty as SOON as I woke up... so... <3 ;; anyway! gorgeous divider by @firefly-graphics ♡

#— reve's reverie 🌹 #reveluving #john price #john price x reader #john price x you #captain price x f!reader #john price x f!reader #cod captain price #captain john price #captain price #captain price x reader #captain price x you #cod #cod mwii #cod mw2 #cod x reader #call of duty #call of duty x reader

[randombush3]

dies irae

alexia putellas x reader

part one, part two, part three

words: 12425 (sorry not sorry)

summary: part four, the part that made me realise another part was necessary

warnings: drugs, alcohol, cheating, (a lot of???) vomiting, general angst tbh

notes: in all honesty, i started this with the intention of finishing the series, but it hit 12k and i thought maybe not x

weird little comment, but the last section was originally written in spanish (hear me out: i was on the plane and i didn’t want the people beside me to read it over my shoulder) and i’m still feeling a little iffy about my translation of my og version but oh well!

i hope you enjoy this and are content w waiting another five years for me to churn out the new FINAL part

The sand is warm beneath your feet, each grain rubbing against your bare soles as you sprint. The ground under such surfaces often hardens, proven by the sweat trickling past the thin string of fabric that holds your bikini together. If the beach were not so private, you would be worried about wandering camera lenses. 

However, there is no one else here but your favourite people. Well, maybe Nico has dropped to the bottom of the list now that your energy has been worn down while his does not seem to waver. 

“I give up,” you pant as he continues to tumble down the shoreline, changing his tactics and swerving into the water, comfortable in his sea. The same sea he looks at each morning from your bedroom window. The one he learnt to swim in. (That and a variety of hotel pools.) “You win, you win!” 

The small figure, around twenty metres away, comes to an abrupt halt, wobbling on little legs for a moment. Then he begins to run again, but this time towards the towels and constructed shade you had set up earlier. Unwillingly, you race him back to base camp. 

“He ganado,” he declares as he taps Alexia’s shining back as though she is the signpost signifying the finish line. Your hand caresses the divots of muscle soon after, brushing sand across smooth, tanned skin. Nico peers at you strangely, but understands, thanks to Tia Alba, that the beach outfits are special to his mothers. 

“Mi ganador,” comes a tired murmur of praise. 

“Did you see, Mami? I was so far ahead.” She nods, craning her neck upwards to talk to him. You gladly sprawl out on the vacant towel, passing on the baton to your wife, fortunate that Elena has been asleep in her buggy for the past twenty minutes. “Can I play with Lela now? Is nap time over?” 

“No, sweetheart, naptime has just begun.” He looks up at you with pleading, bored eyes. The one unfortunate consequence of going to a private beach is that, unless you bring along your babysitter, there is no one else for Nico to play with. Alexia and you are both exhausted, and today is supposed to be about relaxation. Three-year-olds don’t understand that concept. “If you don’t want to sleep, how about burying Mami?” 

“In the sand?” 

“Sí, in the sand.” 

He leans close to your ear. “Mami says I’m not allowed to do that,” he whispers, though he has not quite mastered the volume of such a tone yet. Alexia pretends not to be listening, but you can feel her foot prodding your shin in protest. 

“Rules are sometimes made to be broken,” you tell him. “And if you do bury her, the only way to make her happy again is to get ice-cream. Which means you can also get ice-cream.” 

“You are so annoying,” grumbles Alexia. 

“This morning, I believe the word you used was ‘sexy’,” you retort. With the Euros on the horizon, it seems that the two of you are using up what little time you have to spend together. Though Alexia sometimes feels like there are hands wrapped around her neck after she failed to win the Champions League once more, she is more than happy to take advantage of the time off before she tries to make amends internationally. 

“Mm. You are magically both.” 

You tug your sunglasses – Prada, brand-new from a modelling campaign – down slightly, so that they sit lower on your nose. The sun is warm and doing its best to wear Nico down as he finds his discarded spade and begins to dig, and Elena is still fast asleep.

A mischievous grin forms on your lips, one that Alexia knows well. Topless, she flips over onto her back, excusing herself with a muttered comment about an ‘even tan’, and that is invitation enough for you to cup her cheek, your touch as fiery as the surface of the sun that blankets the beach. The gentle breeze ruffles your hair as you lower yourself down to her level. 

“The phrase is ‘annoyingly sexy’ in English, darling,” you murmur, your eyes locked onto hers. Even now, after six years, the proximity ignites desire over every inch of your skin, and you cannot wait to kiss. Alexia’s initial grumble turns into a soft chuckle, her eyes sparkling with a mixture of amusement and something more. Impatiently, you kiss her, aware that the moment will soon be ruined by a spray of sand as Nico pursues his mission. 

She is just as eager to kiss you back, craving the way you seem to hold the solution to every problem. Part of Alexia’s mind has not yet been able to comprehend the way in which you love her. It is hidden by the other, much larger compartment: the one that reminds her every day that she should never, ever tell you, because it would break your heart. To you, Alexia is making up for lost time. To her, she is secretly begging for forgiveness that you don’t even know she is due. 

She knows the minute your phone rings that everything is about to go wrong. No one is supposed to call you today; you have been emphatic about it. You blindly reach for the ringing device, ready to lob it into the ocean, but Alexia grabs your wrist. “It must be something important,” she says, and it feels like she is telling you she understands; you are busy, and she understands. 

“I’ll be quick, I promise.” With a quick jog up the steps and onto the concrete of the promenade, you perch on the stone wall separating the beach from the carpark, bare feet swinging over the edge. The rough surface of the wall presses uncomfortably into the exposed flesh of your bum, but you remind yourself that you will soon be lying back down on the beach towels. “Hi? I thought we agreed that pretty much everything could wait until tomorrow. I don’t care about any photos taken of me, and you know that my automatic position is simply to ensure that the children’s faces are blurred out before they get spread around.” 

“Y/n!” Your publicist sounds nervous. It’s a stressful job, you guess. Between organising interviews and brand deals and the like, she has to stamp down on unwanted rumours and be on the look-out for any perceived cracks in your very public person. Naturally, you are not perfect. 

“Yeah, I’m here. Hi.” 

“I’m afraid that it’s not a picture of you this time.” Alexia is now famous in her own right, as she always should have been. With a Ballon d’Or under her belt, you have been promoted to a ‘celebrity couple’.

“She has her own team, you know.” 

“I’m sure she will be firing them soon.” The joke fails to land, instead crashing and burning and… You freeze. 

“Why?”

“I am sure that you are aware we have feelers out for anything that could potentially harm your reputation.” You nod foolishly, caught up in the undisclosed severity of the phone call, forgetting that she cannot see you. “An hour ago, we were contacted by a photographer; one of the usual ones we get in when you’re in need of a bit of a press-boost. He’s based in Barcelona, has lots of friends in the area and such. I have the terrible job of telling you.”

Your heart quickens as the confession hangs in the air, leaving a heavy silence on the other end of the line. The anticipation builds, and you can almost feel the impending storm swirling just off the coast, waves beginning to thrash against rocks, nature beginning to tear the world down. 

“He claims to have some photos, ones that could potentially damage your image,” she says, tone measured and professional. “I haven’t seen them yet, but he described them as… intimate, to say the least.” 

“Of Alexia?” you question carefully, forcing the words onto your tongue. “Intimate? What do you mean?”

“Well, they are of her and someone else. Someone who isn’t you.” 

“Who?” Dread sets in, and the wall is suddenly not the most uncomfortable thing about your position. You feel too exposed, unsafe in what you are wearing. Taken advantage of, perhaps. 

Cheated. 

“I have not seen the photos yet, babe. I don’t know what else to tell you.” He would have attached them in his email. Paparazzos don’t have time to harass you digitally as well as in real-life. She must have avoided opening them. Or. Or she is lying.

“I need to see those pictures,” you assert, your need for clarity driving the sentence forwards. 

“Are you sure?” You nod again, unable to speak past the lump in your throat, knowing that she cannot see you but feeling helpless to do anything else. She takes your silence as confirmation. There is a brief click of a mouse, and the animated swoosh of an email. “They should come through in a moment.” 

“Thank you.” 

“Are you… alright?” 

She quickly takes the hint from the lack of response and hangs up. 

You rest your phone on your thigh as your arms grip onto the ledge of the wall, pulling yourself backwards so that you do not fling yourself off it. You shake as you reach safety, and your fingers feel numb as they tap the screen, accessing your emails robotically until a pinwheel is all that separates you from the photos. 

Intimate, huh. 

They are practically snogging. 

There are eleven images, and each one delivers a blow more painful than the last. 

The beach feels confined, like an elaborate cage that you cannot escape. The shoreline creeps towards you, and you seem to be pressed against the hot metal of the car in the carpark. You struggle to recognise the scenes captured as ones where you were present, and the unfortunate date in the bottom right-hand corner evidences the photos as a time when you were not in Barcelona at all: 2021. 

The realisation hits hard and you find that everything you have ever believed to be true has simply been a cruel joke that you were excluded from.

What you have been sent is more than just proof; it is a betrayal etched in pixels, an undeniable record of a moment that shatters the foundation of your relationship. Your heart races as your scroll through the images, cruelly reminded of a reality you desperately wish were not true. One you had no idea existed. One that had been kept secret from you. 

The lump in your throat grows, and your eyes blur with unshed tears. You are overwhelmed by sharp pain coursing through your veins, and it is as if you have been injected with a poison that burns through your cell tissue, disintegrating every block of your body. It scorches the things you know to be true. 

Love goes up in flames before your eyes. 

And then a voice that you really do not want to hear speaks, and, just like that, the ashes of what has disappeared are suddenly ablaze once more. 

“Nico y yo vamos a tomar helado. ¿Quieres algo?” Sandals, sunglasses, a loose linen shirt. Nico holds her hand, proud of himself. You cannot bear to look at either of them, so you stare at the towels a few metres beneath you. 

“Where is Lena?” 

“Dormida, aún.” 

Shaking, you stand up, enjoying the sharp rocks that pierce into your skin, reminding you that you are yet to die. “Take Nico. I’ll go back down and sit with her.” 

“Vale. Te quiero.” 

You don’t reply. You wouldn’t have known what to say anyway. 

Every step feels as though the world is cracking open and you are going to fall to your death, yet, in the midst of the impending doom, you feel as calm as can be. Numb, perhaps. 

Elena stirs as you adjust the parasol providing her the necessary shade. A hand reaches out, prepared to grab onto you, searching for your body like you are her lifeline. You are her lifeline; you are her mother. And so is Alexia. 

A tear rolls down your cheek as you let her pull your fingers to her mouth, nails brushing her lips as she whines with the headache of waking up from a nap. “What are we going to do?” 

…

The car journey home is silent on your part. You stew in your nothingness, unwilling to engage in the light conversation Alexia creates to keep Nico awake before his sleep schedule is ruined. Barcelona flashes past you, and the city that you once admired feels like the scene of a crime. Looking out the window is almost as sickening as if your eyes were to land on the woman beside you. Almost. 

You withhold your grief for the evening, going through the motions of nightly chores; putting the kids to bed, finishing the remainder of your packing, drying the dishes without throwing them at the blonde hair that sails past as she sorts her own suitcases out. A few texts are exchanged between you and your publicist, in which you graciously decide that those pictures will not come from you. Though if her team fails to catch them before they reach Twitter, that is not your problem.

Under the soft glow of the bedside lamp and the comforting blanket of darkness, you clear your throat. 

It has been six hours since you found out.

Every second that has passed has done so with excruciating pain, yet you cannot determine whether it has sunk in at all yet. You wonder if, given the chance, you would crumple into yourself and weep as though she has died. 

When you look at Alexia, readying herself for bed, you decide that the whole situation is laughable. 

You are so stupid. You thought she loved you more than that, and you were embarrassingly incorrect. 

“I want you to leave now,” you say firmly, only the bed between you. Alexia pauses, pyjama shorts halfway up her muscular legs as she peers at you curiously. Her confusion is infuriating. “I want you to… go to your mother’s or something. You’re not sleeping here.” 

“Why? What have I done?” 

She speaks as though this is a normal argument, or as though you are hormonal and unreasonable. You clench your fists and remind yourself not to wake the children up. “I am surprised you didn’t follow her to Mexico.”

It is then that Alexia Putellas realises three things. The first: she hasn’t spoken about Jenni since she left for Pachuca, and she barely pays attention when Nico persuades her to find the stream for the striker’s matches. The second: it has been six months since Jenni called whatever they were doing quits. And the third… the third is how well and truly fucked she is. 

She should have confessed her crime the minute she first slept with her; the night after they were knocked out of the World Cup. Elena wasn’t even a concept, then. You took her back though you were unaware you had ever lost her. 

Last year, when it was Alexia all alone, she should have confessed her second betrayal. A longer, more hurtful betrayal. Something fuelled by meaningfulness, not passion and heightened adrenaline. If she were in your position, the physicality would not be what obliterated her heart; the emotion behind the entire affair would. 

She wipes her eyes, aware that she has started to cry. It is all the confirmation you need. “I’m so sorry,” is the only thing she can think to say, but ‘sorry’ does not amount to the pain she knows she has caused. ‘Sorry’ won’t heal a wound that has cut deep, cut through years of love and happiness and supposed loyalty. ‘Sorry’ does not change the fact that Alexia lent herself to Jenni, let Jenni take her in any capacity she wished, and then returned to you as though it had never even happened. 

In all honesty, part of Alexia is very curious about how you have found her out. Mapi would not risk being caught up in such a storm, and Jenni would gain only suffering from telling you because she knows that Alexia would never choose her. Though she has spent night after night with her finger hovering over her sister’s contact, she resolved never to tell Alba either, for fear that her sister would see her for the monster she is and side with you. Selfishly, Alexia does not want anyone to side with you, but even she finds it easy to hate herself. 

“Is that all you can offer me?” you croak, and it is clear to Alexia that you are this calm because you are putting your children before yourself. They do not need to hear their parents’ marriage implode; not tonight, not ever. She cannot bear to meet your eyes as you pierce through her bowed head. “Alexia.” She pulls her shorts up fully, forehead parallel to the floor. “Alexia!” you snap. 

“I’m sorry,” she repeats. 

Alexia Putellas is regarded by most as intimidating, yet, here, she is anything but. She is meek. Pathetic. 

She is a woman who continued to make a stupid mistake although she was given so many opportunities to fix it. 

And, when Alexia finally grows the balls to look into your piercing eyes, she sees, reflected in your hardened, dark pupils, weakness and idiocy, rimmed with the most stinging of betrayals. It kills her to see you fight your own tears, and it is worse when you have to break eye contact because you are afraid you will vomit if it goes on any longer. 

“You are packed, so you can leave tonight. Sort yourself out while I get the children up.” 

Everything is ruined because of her. 

It is the last night Alexia lives under the same roof as you. It is a horrible way to end a golden age, and the worst possible confirmation of the fleetingness of all things that exist. You hate the world, you hate Jennifer Hermoso, and you hate that you can’t bring yourself to hate your wife. 

Alexia says goodbye to a sleepy Nico and a clingy Elena. Your daughter refuses to let her mother go the minute she is passed to her, and all four of you try your best not to cry, whether it be from confusion, regret, or heartbreak. 

Nico, inquisitive as one is at his age, does not let the door open without questions. ‘Why now?’ is what causes Alexia to freeze, searching on your face for permission to have one more second with him. You cup the back of Elena’s head, fingers splaying out against her soft hair, soothing her back to sleep. And you nod. 

She crouches to his level, dwarfed by her suitcases. In her pocket, her phone buzzes; her taxi has arrived. “¿Te acuerdas cuando te hablé sobre la responsabilidad? Soy la capitana, cariño, y tengo que cuidar a mi equipo, así que ‘ahora’ es lo mejor para ellas.” You are grateful for the lie. 

“¿Ahora yo mando? ¿Como me dijiste?” 

“Sí. Tienes que cuidar a Mama y Lela, y protegerlas como yo os protejo a vosotros. Y nos veremos prontito, petit. Te lo prometo.”

He is fighting his tears, stiff like a toy soldier marching off to an imaginary battle. You half expect Nico to salute with his chubby, unpractised fingers, but he simply stands there, between Alexia and you. Though Elena is safe in your arms, Nico is caught in the crossfire, two feet innocently leading him into no man’s land. 

You take a deep breath as Alexia closes the door behind her. She has been driven out – her own doing – and she knows, because she knows you, that there will be no space in your life for her until your gaping wound dulls in pain. The journey to her mother’s house is the second time she ever considers killing herself, with the first being the night her father died. 

But this is how it goes. 

You fly to England the next day, holding it together until Elena and Nico are safely in the hands of Anya, but you do not give her a reason for her much-needed babysitting abilities.

It is a small secret. You keep it because on top of being in agony, you are so fucking embarrassed. You. You got cheated on. You weren’t enough for her. (And Jenni was?) It’s really easy to pretend you’re stressed for Alexia, knowing she is heading into a tournament that Spain could win but won’t. 

The first official step you take – the very first – is with a nanny. You meet her the day after landing at London Stansted, and she seems to be the perfect choice for the interim period of your life that you have unexpectedly entered; she speaks Spanish, she is discreet, and she reassures you that she is there to enhance family life, not destroy it. And possibly another alluring factor: she is quick to sign an NDA and promise that no photos of your children will make it into any dogshit magazine. 

Her first interaction with your children is two hours before your lunch with your publicist, manager, producer, and lawyer. They have agreed to congregate – they have seen the pictures (an exclusive peek, as the deliciously world-destroying surprise photoshoot has not yet been picked up by anyone with ganas to publish it). Each one has a purpose, each one wants to profit off your heartbreak, and, though they’d never admit it for fear of breaking their hard exteriors, each invitee would also like to see if you’re okay. 

“Do you… like her?” you sheepishly ask your son while Isabela, the nanny, supervises Elena’s lunch. You’re not entirely sure your daughter understands that the hummus is supposed to go into her mouth, not redecorate the highchair table from white to beige, but Isabela does her best to instruct her, the familiar tinkle of Alexia’s language making your daughter’s eyes light up.  

He looks a little puzzled. “Is she a babysitter?” 

“Sort of.” You sigh, “it’s just that I have a lot to do, and Mami is playing football now. Isabela is going to help us, but I want to make sure that you want that.” 

Nico shrugs. “Don’t care.” 

“And she’s going to speak in Spanish, just like Mami does.” In anticipation of a worse reaction, you wince at the slight insinuation that you’re replacing Alexia. He doesn’t pick up on it. 

“She sounds funny.” 

“That’s because she’s from Colombia,” you answer him, and he nods, storing that information for later. Probably for when Alexia calls to speak to him (a moment you are dreading). 

“Is Colombia near Mexico?” He perks up; you know what’s coming next. “Does Isabela know Jenni?” 

You have to remind yourself that Nico has not done anything wrong. The fault of the mother is not the son’s, and, briefly, you pray he has inherited your fidelity for the sake of his future partners. 

You pretend that the name that just fell from his lips does not fill you with the overwhelming urge to strangle someone. And, calmly, you reply, “probably not, but you can always ask her.” 

…

Alexia does not know what to do. 

She wishes, she really does, that someone would pass her a clock… and she knows she has trained and worked hard enough to wrestle the hands of time back a year and change her decisions in every situation. Alas, that is impossible. 

She tells Mapi, as the team touches down in England, what has happened. The defender is unimpressed – angry, even, at her best friend – but nothing warrants what is to come. 

The morning feels eerily normal. Breakfast is difficult, especially when all Alexia can think while she eats is that every morsel in her mouth fuels the monster she has become. Every bite, every sip of coffee, leads her to live another day. She is not particularly certain that she deserves that. 

Mapi does not look at her, swerves her request to be partners when training begins. Head down, eyes slowly filling with tears, Alexia takes the punishment. She says nothing when Pina pinches her side, “Patri’s being annoying”, and drags her into the drill. 

She runs, she passes the ball, Pina turns and shoots it into the mini-net. 

Pina runs, she passes the ball, Alexia turns. 

Something goes wrong. 

Maybe it is that the pitch is uneven, cut up from whoever had trained before. Maybe it’s the pass, slightly off-target. Maybe she is at that point in her menstrual cycle where the risk of injury is higher – that’s being looked into, isn’t it? 

Maybe it’s that her body can no longer stay so robust when everything else in her life is hurtling towards the ground in the most epic downhill slope possible. 

Maybe. 

The pop is unmistakable, and the pain searing. She can’t help the scream she lets out, barely registering whoever has rushed to her side while she presses her face into the dirt, tears watering the grass.

“I’ve done my ACL,” Alexia gasps, lifting her head up slightly. She catches sight of the blue sky, the green grass. The bright sun shining down on her, hot against her neck but nothing in comparison to the agony in her knee. 

She blinks, thinking her eyes are blurring from her tears. 

A second later, she is unconscious. 

When Alexia wakes up, she is glad to have passed out. She has no memory of being hauled off the pitch or brought into the medical room. Her head aches and her knee throbs, but she knows that there is someone beside her so she does her best to hold in the immediate wave of sobs that seem to take over her. 

A calloused hand reaches for hers, unclenching her fist, urging her to squeeze the pain away, pass off some of it to her companion. They have given her pain medication. She can tell because the white walls dance around her and the only word she can manage to get out is your name. 

She whispers it over and over again. 

“I know,” comes a soothing voice, poorly concealing the worry that cracks the tone. “Shh, I know, I know. You’re okay, Ale. She’s… she’s on her way.” 

…

The call is unexpected. 

Mapi never has much reason to talk to you on your own, unless you share a concern for your wife’s wellbeing. You suppose that’s a bit of a redundant commonality now. Your lawyers have drawn up a custody agreement and, upon meek request, divorce papers: a gift for after the Euros. 

“Dime, Mapi. Estoy trabajando,” you say curtly, signalling from inside the booth that the phone call is nothing to worry about and you can resume the recording session in a moment. 

Mapi’s news makes you even more resentful than you were already feeling, because you can’t help but sprint to your car the minute the address is given. 

…

Pain becomes part of everyday life.

Crutches, too. 

Alba and Eli already existed as frequent visitors, but the former increases her appearances so that she has moved in the day before Alexia’s surgery. 

It spills out, the night of the surgery, that Alexia and you are no longer together. That you left her, with good reason. It’s a surprise, considering you had stayed by her side during the twelve hours in England between the medical room, the hospital, and the airport. 

When Alexia reluctantly tells Alba why, Alba decides that you are a saint and her sister, a sinner. She holds her hands behind her back to keep herself from slapping Alexia across the face, but little does she know, Alexia longs for the anger, wishing she wasn’t being pitied for her injury. She wishes there was no injury to be pitied for, but, then again, she tells herself that she deserves it and accepts the agony as one would hold a blade to their wrists and slit them. 

This behaviour, this quiet ideology that she has been punished for her mistake, is what leads Alba to ensure the keys to the balcony are hidden and the kitchen knives are tucked away in a cupboard, out of sight. Or perhaps it is what she hears her sister telling herself in the mirror. Worthless. Degenerate. Evil, cruel, horrible. Selfish! 

She has two children with you, for God’s sake!

“I have ruined my own life.” Her words burn, the intensity of her anger enough to make Alba flinch, hands gripping the steering wheel harder, forcing her way forwards. The hospital comes into view and Alexia cries out in anguish. “I have ruined it, Alba! I have ruined everything!”

Alexia, The Ruiner. 

She bears the new name with something more than disappointment. She lets the nurses examine her knee, compliment Alba for her care-taking, and reassure her about the surgery. She lets them talk her through possible complications, secretly hoping one will occur and she will wither away; no longer a footballer, no longer a mother, no longer your wife. Just Alexia, The Ruiner. 

Alba and her argue, Alexia lying back in the cot, hospital gown patterned against clinically white sheets, light fabric against her paling skin. “You wanting to die is not you wanting to kill yourself. It’s your regret, and it’s your cowardice at not being able to face the consequences of your actions.” Alexia had been hot-headed enough to voice how she did not want to make it through the surgery. She is in excruciating pain, and is convinced they need to investigate it. “It’s your knee, not your heart. Your heart hurts because you cheated on her and she rightfully left you! Don’t you ever say something so fucking stupid again.” 

“Alba!” Eli’s entrance is neither good nor bad. “Alba, leave her.” Alexia’s tears run down the sides of her face, hitting the sheets like little bullets. The soft caress of her mother’s hand across her cheek is no comfort, and Alexia only sobs harder. “You are going to be fine, mi cielo. The surgery is going to go well and you will come back even stronger.” 

Alexia knows that, once you have torn your ACL, you are more likely to tear it again, so she mentally disputes her mother’s claim. She has no energy to voice the thought, however. 

“Mamá, she’s convinced she’s going to have a heart attack.” Alba points to her sister’s chest, as if to disagree by showing their mother that nothing seems to be out of the ordinary. They begin to argue, and Alexia watches her family implode, deeming herself once more, Alexia, The Ruiner. 

It’s not a heart attack, it turns out. She falls victim to a severe panic attack just as they begin to wheel her away. They increase her dosage of anaesthetic. 

Unfortunately, the next morning Alexia comes to after a successful surgery and remembers nothing. That is until she looks to her bedside and finds only her mother there (Alba having gone to the big, empty apartment to adjust it to her sister’s newly-disabled lifestyle). 

She relives the kisses Jenni used to press to her neck, the marks sucked into her skin though Jenni knew she was not hers to brand. She relives your expression when you told her you knew, the grimace you had worn, the way your eyes flicked to the ensuite as though you were going to throw up at any point. 

She hears her knee pop again, sees the trophy slip from her grasp, sees it float into the realm of possibility along with the Champions League cup. 

“You’re awake,” Eli says with surprise, offering a warm but sympathetic smile. She reaches out to touch Alexia, but Alexia jerks her body backwards, instantly regretting it when her knee begins to ache unbearably. “They said you’ll be in a lot of pain at first, but it will subside and, soon, you can start recovery. Your physiotherapist is going to visit in an hour or so, and I cannot count how many well-wishes you have received.” Weirdly, Eli thinks to herself, Jenni has said nothing. 

Alexia shakes her head, trying to dispel the fog in her mind. “Do the… Do the children know I am hurt?” 

“I believe so,” Eli replies with a nod. “Y/n broke the news to them, but we haven’t heard from her since you went into the operating theatre. I have no idea whether she’s going to come here. I assume she will.” 

“She won’t,” mutters Alexia, refusing to look at her mother.

“Oh, don’t be so gloomy. She’s your wife, of course she is going to come.” A dark storm brews in the cagey hospital room, but Eli remains an oblivious ray of sunshine. “I know you don’t want Nico and Lela to see you like this, but they miss you. They must have been so excited for the Euros!” 

All of it is the wrong thing to say. If Eli had known, she would have approached the uncertainty differently. 

If Alexia were not so angry at herself, so guilty, so destructive, she would have calmly explained that your absence is both warranted and understandable. 

Instead. 

Well, instead, this comes out of her: “She is not going to come because I had a fucking affair and she has left me and taken the children to fucking England where they are probably never going to be allowed to see me ever, and I will live out the rest of my days as a fucking coach because I am useless and I am never going to play football again!” 

Eli sits back in her chair, shocked. 

“What have you done?” 

Neither knows if it is a question or a damnation, but Alexia chooses to answer her mother regardless; “I have ruined everything, and now I am paying the price for it.” 

…

Your friends gloat a little bit, calling it Karma. Anya and Gio are first in disbelief, but they soon progress onto the stage of hatred – something you have not yet been able to access. 

For now, life feels as though it is on auto-pilot. Your children are happy and safe, your country is going to do well in the Euros, and time does not stop ticking no matter how hard you wish it would. 

Alexia’s surgery is successful. You see the update on Twitter, not wanting to contact Alba or Eli in case Alexia thinks you have forgiven her. You haven’t. Perhaps you never will. 

“There are two ways you can go about this,” Gio says with a smirk, holding out a thong to you as you stand in your bedroom in just a towel. “You’re hot and rich and famous… and now single, too.” You are not completely sure of that, but you nod, following along. You slip into the lace and then point to the England shirt folded on top of your pillow. It gets thrown at your face. “You can wallow in it and weep like a damsel in distress, giving her the satisfaction of breaking your heart…” 

“I don’t think she wanted to–” 

“She cheated on you,” Gio cuts you off bluntly. After a moment, your shoulders drop and you resign to hearing her plan. “As said earlier, hot, rich, famous… Babe, just get with someone else. Get with everyone else! Your babies are looked after 24/7 and this is London, my dear. The pond is really an ocean and you are a catch. As your bestest friend, I know what’s best for you. You’ve got an album coming out in September, a tour to hop on in November, and about three thousand dildos you can hop on after that!” 

You cringe. “Don’t be crass.” 

“Don’t be a prude.” She gestures to herself. “Look at me; Mia’s fine and healthy, doesn’t legally have to see her arsehole of a father, and I get a good shag every fortnight.” 

“No, I’ve drawn up the custody agreement already. I’ll go back to Barcelona when the school year starts, and we can swap every two weekends. But I’m keeping our home – she can find somewhere else to live, seeing as all of this is her fault.” 

“And the tour?” Gio asks as you pull on your England jersey and a pair of shorts. Good weather has blessed the start of the tournament, and you have been invited to the first match at Old Trafford by Manchester United themselves. Gio and Anya are coming, and you think they have put you in with a few of their players and executives. Your father has his own ticket, planning to meet you there and convince you to pay your grandmother a visit (she doesn’t like that you are lesbian and therefore you don’t like her). 

“I don’t know,” you sigh, “because I’m not sure if it’s a good idea to make the children’s lives even more unstable. Maybe it’s best to give them a few months to adjust to the idea of us not being together.” 

Gio hums in agreement, knowing she had it easy with her own co-parenting adjustment because her daughter was a baby with no recollection of her parents being a couple, much less in-love. “You’re a good mum.” She kisses your cheek and wraps you in a very needed hug. “You’ll get through this because you are stronger than a pathetic affair.”

You swear. 

“What time’s our train leaving?!” 

The match is a good one, and the atmosphere is enough to make you feel the slightest bit alive. Spain plays in two days, and though you have good reason to believe Alexia is going to be there, you are booking a family trip to Legoland to delay the first hand-off of many. 

England win with one goal to nil, courtesy of Beth Mead’s chip. You are on your feet, cheering the entire match. One of the United executives tells you that he loves your passion and asks you if you’d take his ticket to the post-match drinks as he wants to head home for a nap. You laugh, the old Mancunian reminding you of your father, and accept. It’s just the one ticket, so you bid Gio and Anya goodbye, book a hotel for the night (comfortable with the idea that Isabela has safe hands to care for your children), and give your father a valid reason to pass up on the visit to Didsbury. 

The only person at this event that you really know is Alessia Russo, after exchanging a few DMs last Christmas to wrangle a signed Manchester United jersey for Nico’s Christmas present (a gift Alexia had refused to say was from her as well). 

“No kids today?” she asks with a grin, pulling you into a friendly hug. 

“Didn’t manage to get them tickets,” you reply. “But now I get to drink, and you get to watch me and wish you weren’t on a nutrition plan.” 

She shakes her head. “We’ve actually been instructed to celebrate the wins. Sarina Wiegman says it’s a key part of tournament success.” You look around the room, noticing every Lioness here, hair still wet from the showers and donning team-issued tracksuits, has a can of beer in their hands. Jorge Vilda could never. “Glad to see you haven’t yet become a Spain and Barcelona fan. Feeling patriotic enough to be introduced to our captain?” 

Leah Williamson bears the same concentrated eyes gifted to Alexia; determination, victory, leadership. 

You’re unsure if you have ever formally met her, perhaps at the Brits once. “I go with Alex? Alex Scott,” she says, as though she is trying to impress you. She takes the briefest of looks down to your hands that hang near your waist with no glass to hold (the bar has cut you off for half an hour). 

You wear one ring. It is not the one with which Alexia promised you her total devotion, but it is from her all the same. An old gift – maybe from your first anniversary? 

Leah doesn’t ask whether you are still married. 

“I heard your son loves football?” He is obsessed with his mother, he wishes to follow her in every single thing she does. “You should bring him to our next match. I’ll get him one of those passes, and– Hey, you know what? I bet there’s a way I can get him a place as a mascot for one of the matches! Both our next ones are down south.” 

You smile. “Really?” 

“Yeah, course. He might be a bit young but I’m always glad to help out our little fans, and it might throw Spain off their game.” She winks, offering no further explanation, and is suddenly called away before you can request more information. 

You have to admit, the idea of Nico walking (toddling) out with England makes you feel both proud and satisfied. It will be a tiny jab towards Alexia, which, honestly, is a privilege considering how she has stabbed you in the back repeatedly with a machete. 

When your son’s first time on a proper football pitch is with Alessia Russo, holding her hand with wide eyes and a wider smile, you are sure Alexia has smashed the screen of whatever TV she has been studying her opponents with. 

…

Spain playing England in the quarter-final feels intensely political within your family. 

Alexia is in Brighton for the first time in her life, and she hates more than anything that she is not preparing herself for a match. She won’t be going through her pre-game rituals for another seven months, at least. 

You tell Isabela to take the children to Alexia’s hotel, unable to put yourself in front of the wheel. Your hands have not stopped shaking since your manager texted you a screenshot of their conversation (seeing as you refuse to talk to her, not for pettiness but for fear of breaking yourself in two), and Isabela poured you a glass of wine before she left to calm your nerves. 

You feel sick, and the toilet water turns red as your body rejects the rioja. Once you have wiped your mouth, you laugh at the notion that even Spanish wine is unwelcome inside of you. 

“Who are you?” Alexia demands as the revolving doors of the lobby reveal her two babies with a stranger. She is quick to remove Elena from the arms of this new woman, although she is disgruntled by how comfortable her daughter seems. One of her crutches falls to the ground, Alexia not having been able to master childcare and post-surgery impairments because she has not seen the children she is supposed to care for, but she does not find it in herself to care.

“Hola, Sra. Putellas. Encantada.” Isabela holds out her hand but Alexia does not shake it, jaw clenched at the way you have gotten a Spanish-speaking nanny as though to completely erase her babies’ Catalan accents and memory of their other mother! “Me contrataron para ayudar a Y/n con los niños. Me dijeron que usted se encargaría de ellos hoy.”

“Sí, lo estoy haciendo, porque son MIS hijos.” She looks at Nico, who has been hiding shyly behind his nanny’s leg, afraid of his mother’s fierceness. Alexia softens, hoping to welcome him into her embrace, but her stupid knee won’t bend and she can’t get onto his level. Isabela reaches out to help her, or to at least steady her so that she doesn’t drop the squirming toddler she is holding, but the help is unwanted and, quite frankly, embarrassing. 

Alexia’s frustration brings tears to her eyes. 

She quickly blinks them back. 

“¿Le gustaría que la ayudara, Sra. Putellas? Me han pagado por trabajar hoy, así que no es un proble–” 

“¡No!” Alexia snaps. Silently, she curses how condescending and petty you have become. Paying the nanny in advance to taunt her for her injuries! “No. Estaré bien. Soy su madre.”

“Por supuesto, pero también está herida.” Isabela looks around the lobby for a moment. “¿Está sola?” 

Alexia knows that Mapi’s parents are going to be arriving any minute now, kindly offering to help out with Nico and Elena. “Oh, we do not mind! We’d love for María to have children of her own,” they had said. 

“Soy perfectamente capaz de manejarlo–” 

“Isabela,” Isabela supplies. 

“Isabela,” Alexia repeats. “Ahora, si ha terminado, vaya a disfrutar su día libre.” 

She waits on the sofa just left of the door for Mapi’s parents, silently begging them to arrive as soon as possible. Nico is bored and would like to run around, upset that Alexia denies him his fun whenever he whines to play. Elena is tired, grumpily napping in Alexia’s lap, but that means she can’t position her knee the way the surgeons had asked her to. Isabela hadn’t meant to, but she had dumped two rucksacks of toys, snacks, and clothes onto Alexia, who still hasn’t been able to retrieve her crutch from the floor. 

Close to tears and very overwhelmed, the arrival of the couple comes as a great relief. “Oh, you poor thing,” coos Mapi’s mother, a caring woman from whom her friend inherited the same quality. She kisses Alexia’s forehead and instantly takes the weight from her lap, hushing the soft whimpers Elena lets out. “Let us look after the babies. You make sure you have the tickets sorted. Have you taken your pain medication? Oh, let me take care of it for you.” 

The fuss is something she has had to get used to, but she is thankful for the assistance. They wrestle Nico into his red Spain jersey, something he was not delivered in, and they ensure all three of their wards are comfortable before the stadium appears in the windshield of the taxi. 

Alexia begins to get nervous. 

Spain has more talent than England – always has – but they don’t have the same funding nor support. Their manager is a dickhead and the federation corrupt, and Alexia’s teammates suffer daily in a way no Lioness would be able to comprehend. She fears for their reputation, for their progression. 

Her nerves increase when she sees you in the stands, in your own box of course. It seems that you see her too, but your only acknowledgement of her presence is the wave you give to your children. Alexia has to remind them sharply in Catalan that they are Spanish. 

Afterwards, when Spain lost and Alexia is blaming herself for the defeat, you walk through the tunnel, following Leah’s directions that she had sent over text. You’d added her to your contacts yesterday, growing tired of Instagram DMs.

The odd thing about this area is that to your left, nothing is heard and the air hangs its head in shame, but to your right, a nation celebrates its victory. Sadly, you know you have to fetch your children from the Spain changing room before you say goodbye to the English heroines. 

You knock on the door, politely. You have never been more glad that a player has not been selected for a squad. Jenni has missed the Euros due to injury, much like her partner-in-crime. 

A solemn Ona Batlle, a Manchester United player who serves as a bridge between worlds in your household, opens the door, making no attempt to force a smile when she sees that it is you. You are (were) their captain’s wife; you are like family. 

“Hi,” you breathe, not wanting to be the one to pierce through the silence. 

Ona stands to one side and you pass. 

Most of the girls are tearful, sniffling into their jerseys, heads in their hands, but no one is as distraught as Mapi. Her sobs take the fun out of winning, her devastation crushing and contagious and impossibly hard to ignore. She buries her face into Alexia’s shoulder, but it does nothing to muffle her cries. 

You gulp, catching hazel eyes, understanding the plea to not make this feel worse. 

You are heartbroken, and so is Mapi. For different reasons, yes, but both organs are shattered in the same way. 

Alexia mutters something very quietly, secretly wishing Mapi does not let her go because this is the first time the defender has actually spoken to her since Alexia did what she did, but the blonde hair stops itching her face soon enough. 

Rooted to the spot, you search the room for two smaller Spaniards, finding them both taking after Alexia, comforting the players. 

“Nico, Lela, come on,” you croak, finding tears in your own eyes. “Say bye-bye to Mami.” 

Their hugs and kisses are missed the moment Alexia leaves the country, and the absence of them makes Alexia crumble completely when she finds the letter from your lawyer that Alba has been hiding from her. 

…

September rolls around with school, the start of your custody agreement, and the release of your new album. 

Judgement Day. 

For many, it confirms the split from your wife. Those pictures were never picked up by a magazine, so you have had them deleted with a baseless threat to sue for defamation.

Alexia no longer has to communicate with you through one of your employees, but any texts exchanged are few and far between. She tells you that she is renting a flat near the training centre. It has three bedrooms, but Nico and Elena share one because her mother is living with her while she recovers from her ACL. She also partially tore her meniscus, though she had hesitated to pass that news on, but everything seems to be in order and she is ahead of schedule.

You reluctantly text her whenever you leave the country, whether that is because you are flying to London for work (and to visit Leah, who you are now good friends with) or because a club opening has called and you have answered. It’s not as messy as the media makes it seem, but you agree with the articles that say you seem to drink as though it is what keeps you alive. The word ‘addict’ gets thrown around, but you are sitting in an armchair in front of your therapist before that escalates, if not for yourself then for the sake of your children. 

They themselves do not understand. Nico frequently asks when Alexia will come home, though he has usually just visited her when this question pops out, and Elena throws big tantrums during the swaps. Those are done at a neutral location: the park near you. You hope the playground takes the edge off the palpable tension between you and Alexia as you sit on opposite sides of the same bench, exchanging brief updates about your shared duty until whoever is a mother for the next two weekends makes up an excuse to go. 

Just before Christmas, once you have calculated that it’s technically Alexia’s turn with their children until January, you go on your biggest night-out since the days when all you were was a 2010s pop star in a girl-group. With no one to go home to and an empty house in Highgate awaiting your return, you get the closest to sleeping with someone else since before meeting Alexia. Her lips trail down your neck, the white powder on her nose rubbing onto your skin as she presses herself into you. You grope her body desperately, painfully dissatisfied by the bones and creamy skin your hands find. You are used to muscle, to strength, to power. 

Not some anorexic model who calls you a MILF and hasn’t had a sober day in years. 

In the end, you don’t end up sleeping with her, but it makes the headlines nonetheless. Your publicist lets them. “The world needs to see you move on, even if you aren’t,” she says. Your slight disagreement is not voiced, and social media explodes with further confirmation that you are single. A group of football fans are quick to attack you, calling you cruel for leaving Alexia when she is injured, but the thousand-person army doesn’t particularly bother you. You are doing your ex a favour by not opening up about the reason for the split, and you are both aware of that. 

You spend Christmas with your parents, who are not pleased to have you moping about their house. Your father tells you that success is the best revenge. You tell him that your album has topped the charts in December, winning its battle against Christmas music. 

“But that hasn’t mended a broken heart,” he is unkind enough to point out. “And neither will models, drugs, or alcohol.” 

At this point in the day, you have made it through a bottle and a half of wine and a pack of Marlboro Golds. Voice hoarse from smoking and sobbing the entirety of Christmas Eve, you tell him to “fuck off” and call a taxi for yourself. 

You don’t remember the destination you had typed in, but you end up at Leah Williamson’s house. 

Leah is home, having returned from Milton Keynes half an hour ago, and is not really surprised by the state you are in. She supposes that she has gotten to know you well enough to realise that you are far from stable. This is the first time the English captain has seen you heartbroken, but she is unsure whether it will be the last. 

…

Your tour commences the following month, with January being a fresh start to a new year. You tell Leah, who invites you out with her on NYE, that this year you won't be cheated on. It is not the comment that makes her laugh, but rather the way it slurs out of your mouth.

Barcelona feels suffocating when you arrive at the park to say goodbye to Nico and Elena. You’ll be in the States for the entire month and maybe some of February. Alexia is sure it will be fine, especially since the team has taken it upon themselves to look after the two children and help where they can. Additionally, Alexia is growing closer to one of her friends, Olga, who loves children and wanted to be a teacher before she decided on something much cooler. 

Alexia has the courtesy to send Mapi and Ingrid in her place, knowing that you do not want to talk to her. You haven’t yet heard her explanation, but that does not matter. Nothing excuses what she did, and nothing will. (And with Jenni, who is no longer the godmother to Elena, the title being revoked instantly.)

“Will you miss us?” Nico asks as you kiss his soft hair, hugging him tightly. “Mami said that we have to swap every three findes so why no now?” 

“Why not now?” you gently correct him. “Because I have to work. I’m going to sing in front of lots and lots of people and, maybe, write some new songs!” Your attempt to excite him crashes and burns, but you are not going to give up. “This is a secret so you can’t tell anyone, but some really, really special people want to make songs with me.” 

“Who?” he pouts. 

“Well, one of Mami’s favourites, Karol G. She is very nice, and she told me she has an idea for a collaboration.” Petty, yes, but also a career move. Nico’s innocence and lack of understanding about the meaning of separation means that he sees your plans as a very nice gift for Alexia.  “And, let me think. Ooh, Bad Bunny – you know him, don’t you? I’m sure Pina or Patri or–” 

He pulls away from your embrace, taking a step back. “Sí,” he says, sounding exactly like Alexia, “but to Mami, she no like because he says rude things.” 

“Adults are allowed to say rude things,” you reply with a cheeky smile, winking at him. “Your mami says rude things all the time, but not in front of you.” 

“Really?” 

“Yep, but you’ll have to ask her about that.” 

Alexia has hobbled through the nighttime routines, aided by Olga, who has halved the job by picking Elena and Nico up from nursery and school and watching them until Alexia’s day at the training ground had ended. Her and Olga haven’t kissed yet, but Alba has advised her sister to be quick about it if she ever intends to. Alexia is not sure she does want that, because your absence has only made how much she loves you (and how much she fucked up) even more obvious.

Their beds are on opposite sides of the room, which is technically the master bedroom – only fair, Alexia thinks, because they are having to share here but not when staying with you – and Elena is fast asleep by the time Nico is tired of the bedtime stories he has relentlessly requested. She brushes off the slight sting of his dismissal of her acting and helps him settle underneath the covers. 

As usual, she presses a kiss to both cheeks and the tip of his nose, and tells him to have nice dreams and a good rest. The weekend starts tomorrow, which means he gets to join Alexia at the training centre and sit in on the sessions. Alexia is slightly jealous because she is still stuck in the gym, but as long as he is entertained, she will get over it.

“Mami, how long is a month?” asks Nico, voice small and groggy and… is that a hint of an accent? Maybe the two and a half months of Isabela’s Spanish has affected him. She will look into it. 

He tugs on her jumper when she spaces out. “Sorry,” Alexia whispers. “A month is thirty days. Maybe you need to pay attention at school.” She pokes his cheek playfully, and he giggles. 

“I do pay attention, I do. Thirty days is long.” 

Alexia dreams of the football pitch, of the grass she has been promised she will play on before April. “It can be very long,” comes her agreement, picturing where in her recovery she will be come February. “It can also be very short.” 

“I miss Mama.” 

His statement, unbeknownst to him, is uncomfortably relatable. 

“Thirty days will be very short. You’ll see her again soon, and, you know what? She made me promise to give you goodnight kisses from her every night! She is going to send them to me from America, and I’ll pass them onto you.” 

“Really?” 

“Sí,” says Alexia with pursed lips, raising her eyebrows to invite him to doubt her. He looks up at her with adoration, as if her word is law. She can only be thankful that you are merciful enough to have not turned her own children against her. You have expressed your wish to keep them from being collateral damage, and Alexia respects you for that. 

“Mama said that she makes songs in LA with Karol G!” 

Then again, there are other ways to be petty.

…

Touring has always exhausted you. Eat, sleep, travel, sing, in varying orders; the schedule grows repetitive and tight after the first week.

After the first show in LA, you bring a blurry face to your hotel room. You kiss her, you can’t bear to do anything more, and you let her sleep off her drugs in your bed while you take the sofa in your suite. 

High on adrenaline half the time and utterly knocked-out when not, you zombie your way through the travelling, grouchily rehearsing new songs on the road, signing merchandise for your screaming fans. You get asked about your private life in a few interviews initially, but the journalists soon learn that the topic is to be avoided if they wish for you to talk to them at all. 

The headlines continue to tear apart images captured of you at clubs, and magazines never seem to find the pictures of you with your children when you visit them while you make your way around Europe. 

There comes a point where you look at a woman and she becomes, in the eyes of the media, your latest plaything. 

Alexia is seething by the time your two-night show in Barcelona rolls around. 

One day, when Nico and Elena understand the concepts of affairs and heartbreak, they will see the articles written about their mothers; the hate Alexia gets, the times she has been called a whore by fans of the same sport she devotes her life to, the stark inequality between her and her male counterparts. With these horrors of the world, they’ll see the pictures of you, pupils blown out, eyes red. Women clinging onto you that perhaps faintly resemble Alexia. 

Because Alexia knows you, because she loves you, she can see that what has been labelled your ‘slay’ era is really fuelled by devastation. A disaster that she caused. It riddles her with guilt, but she doesn't know how to expel that emotion from her head without reverting to the early days of her loneliness where she ate nothing and made her sister seriously worry whether she was going to find her bleeding out in the bathtub one day. And so, with a lack of command over such a strong feeling, she decides to rage. She is furious with your irresponsibility. 

“Where should we eat?” your guitarist asks with a grin as you touchdown in Barcelona. The soft murmur of Spanish and Catalan is unexpectedly comforting, the familiarity grounding. Maybe Barcelona has become your home. Maybe it never stopped being that, because home is where the heart is and, frustratingly, yours still belongs to the woman who tore it out of your chest and didn’t even have the guts to tell you about it. 

“I can’t,” you reply quickly, wiping the sweat from travel off your brow with the sleeve of your turtleneck. “I promised my son I’d tuck him in while I’m in the country, and my daughter has been drawing at nursery so I’d like to collect some of the pictures and see if I can get them blown up onto canvases.” 

Laughing, your crew make their way off the jet. “You know, most celebrities would pay thousands for abstract art but you get yours from a toddler.” 

“She’s talented.” Mapi draws with her, you’ve been told. Elena is what makes Ingrid yearn for a ring to appear in their relationship sooner rather than later. “And take the piss all you want, but if you had had to put my kids through what I have, you’d feel the same.” 

The sofa in the Putellas household (the apartment no longer inhabited by Eli, who was very glad to escape the intense atmosphere as soon as Alexia was cleared to live by herself) houses three unsettled humans of varying sizes. The biggest, Alexia, shifts on the soft, new cushions, awaiting your arrival with gulps of brewing tears and the latest set of paparazzi photos of you fresh in her mind. The boy, Nico, practically vibrates with excitement, promising himself that he will drag out this bedtime as long as possible to make up for all the others you have missed. The smallest is upset because she hasn’t fallen asleep yet, kept awake by her older brother who shakes her whenever she starts to drift off, hastily scolding her with a ‘no, Lela! Mama is coming home’. 

With no key to this flat, you are forced to be buzzed up. 

The anticipation builds. Nico and Alexia try to remember what you smell like, testing themselves to see if they can recall it scent for scent. Have you changed your shampoo? Alexia wonders, Do you still use the same moisturiser?

“Hi, my darlings!” you squeal as the door flies open and Nico comes hurtling into your crouched form, closely followed by his unsteady little sister. “Oh, how I’ve missed you!” You squeeze them as though you are never going to let go, and only release them from the hug when Elena begins to whine, adrenaline rush dying and tiredness overcoming her once more. 

“Mama, home,” Nico says with an inaccurate finality. You spare Alexia a glance as he pulls you through the bare walls and grey decor until you reach a door with stickers up and down the white-washed wood. “Mami made me change, but you can read! Lela wants this one.” He rumages through the box of books near the children’s whiteboard (on it, the odd x’s and o’s of football tactics), pulling out a few to stack into his own pile before thrusting something you recognise very well. 

“Mami reads to us in English sometimes,” he says matter-of-factly, though Alexia silently curses him from where she is standing in the doorway. “Important to know.” 

You chuckle. “Mm, very important. How else would you talk to me?” Elena quietly crawls into your lap, happy to take over Nico’s bed, where you are sitting. You stroke her hair, holding her close. “Mami reads you ‘The Very Hungry Caterpillar’?” 

He is too young to know what scepticism looks like. 

“Es que hay ‘La Pequeña Oruga Glotona’.” 

You refuse to look at the voice which speaks, but you nod. 

“Alright, why don’t you get into bed, and then I’ll start to make my way through the mountain of books. I am absolutely all yours for tonight, my loves.” 

… 

Alexia’s hands slam down on the dining table, slapping against the wood with a loud bang. “Enough!” she exclaims, her voice slicing through the tense air like a knife. Her eyes blaze in fury and you shrivel, not quite sure what you have done to her. You grant her the silence she needs to continue, though her shout echoes through the shattered tranquillity like a bomb that continues to explode. “It is enough.” 

“What, Alexia?” 

You sound kind of… bored once you have regained your composure. Your shock is now replaced with a blank expression, and you run your eyes over your nails, examining your cuticles so that you don’t risk making eye contact with her. 

“You think you can just waltz in here as if you haven’t offered yourself to the entire world and expect everything to be okay?” Her voice trembles with indignation, venom dripping from each word she spits out. “You can’t go from common slut to mother in one day!” 

Nails forgotten, you square your shoulders and set your jaw. “I hadn’t realised you were the jealous type, Ale.” The nickname slips out like a poisonous dart, taunting her, wounding her. It rattles her, and you intend to shake her more. “It’s none of your business, not anymore. Deal with it – or don’t, I don’t care.”

“What kind of example are you setting for our children?” she continues, lips curling into a scornful sneer. “Kissing anything with a mouth! Like some, some hormonal teenager. And to have it all over the papers? It’s trashy! It’s embarrassing for me, because my wife has her hands down the pants of every woman she meets, pumped full of alcohol and drugs and… You, you go to these events, paid to get yourself on the front pages so that they can be mentioned in the location of the incident, and… and that’s like prostitution! Making money from your body, from sex!”

Her fists clench and she storms towards you, footsteps harsher than her bad knee can probably take, but you make no move to back down. You lift your chin up; “I don’t have to resort to prostitution for money. I have more than enough.” 

“Then you do it for attention,” Alexia reasons with herself, albeit very loudly. “That is what you are, aren’t you? A slut for the cameras and the glitz and glamour of it all. So quick to jet off on tour, leaving me with our children–” 

“I may be a ‘slut’ for attention, but at least I am not a whore for a woman who is not my fucking wife!” You press your hand to her chest roughly, pushing her away from you. “I’m not the one who had an affair, I’m not the one who ruined everything!”

Alexia recoils at your words, freeing herself from your searing touch before she melts. She forces her fury to its boiling point. “How dare you,” she seethes, voice cracking at the ferocity in which she forces the sentence out. “You think you can just throw my mistakes in my face?” You hold your ground. She will not intimidate you. “You think you’re so righteous, but you’re not as innocent as you pretend to be.” 

It is a baseless accusation. You both know it. 

“The only fact we have here is that you fucked Jenni. Our daughter’s godmother. Your ‘best friend’, my friend too! I trusted her, and I trusted you, and you took that trust and obliterated it by sleeping with her!” 

Alexia wants to cut you deep, wants to give you the gory details of it all, but she hears the croak of your voice and knows you will not make it to your hotel if she tells you.

“I slept with Jenni, sure, but you have passed yourself around enough to make us even.”

“Nothing will make us ‘even’, Alexia,” you cry, meaning to sound scarier than you do. You can’t help the tears from streaming down your face, nor the hoarseness of your throat. “And I would never ever do to you what you did to me!” 

You have to go on vocal rest the next day, otherwise the concert would be called off. 

Alexia refuses to attend, even though most of her teammates will, instead pawning Nico and Elena off to your backstage staff and dangerously driving herself to Alba’s place. 

It is one of those nights where Alba cannot leave her side for fear Alexia will choke herself to death on her tears. When the elder of the two can longer hold it all in, Alba ties her hair back with an old hair bobble so that the blonde strands don’t get in the way of her sister’s vomit. 

("I don't want to live like this," Alexia says, her eyes wide and alert. Her little sister looks at her with empathy, searching, with a broken heart, for a version of a woman from the past she's not sure she knows. This Alexia is not the same.

"Of course you don’t." It's obvious. Obvious by the way she forces her existence without happiness, without company, without a smile. It's like there is no sun in Alexia's world, nor a blue sky, nor an end.

It never ends.

So, she says, "I don't want to live like this, without her, without the family I dream of every night, every waking moment. I don’t want to live, Alba. I didn’t want to live in August, and I haven’t since, and I… I do it because people rely on me." She takes in a deep, acidic breath, grimacing at the taste of bile on her tongue. “If it were just me, just Alexia”--The Ruiner, she silently adds–“I wouldn’t be here. Alba, Alba, I don’t want to live like this.”

She carries on repeating it because Alba has to understand. There can't be a possibility that Alba thinks her sister is insincere. What a lie that would be! To Alexia, she prefers death over continuing like this, with her head in the toilet and vomiting, vomiting, vomiting. 

"If I had the chance, I would go back to August 2021 and never sleep with Jenni. I’d not let her kiss me, not give into it. I'm exhausted from it; from my loneliness, from the kids' questions, asking when their mother will come back home. Do you know that Nico asked me if we still loved him? If she still loves him? And why his friends have two parents and he seems to have a shell of a woman for one, and a vacant space in the king-sized bed for the other?"

"She might not want you again, however, and your imagined future may be false – it is the opposite of reality, no? If I were her, I wouldn't. You cheated on her when she only gave you love and patience and… Well, Alexia, I swear I really want to see you happy, but I just don't think she'll forgive you."

"And why not?"

Alba sighs. She places her hand on Alexia's back, moving it in circles to calm her sister down. When they were little, it was always Alexia who helped Alba. With school, with her problems, with new lovers or ones from the past. It was her responsibility to take care of her little sister, and when their father died and there were only three of them, Alexia felt that responsibility even more. 

Here, roles reversed, Alba can only apply that which she has learnt from the heaving lump of flesh slumped on the chequered tiles. 

"Alba," repeats Alexia, lowering her voice, relenting. "She loves me."

The younger of the two can’t help the tears that brim in her eyes, distressed in her own right. "She loves you despite your other girlfriend because she's a saint. She's a saint but, if you want her to be happy, you cannot take advantage of her," Alba warns gravely, sincerely, and correctly. Alexia lifts her head and looks at the clock on the bathroom wall. Alba's apartment is clean and trendy, just like the woman, and she has dirtied it with her presence. She remains, for the foreseeable future, Alexia, The Ruiner. 

"Smartass."

"It's just the truth."

"Well, if that's the truth, I'd rather you be a liar."

Alba sighs again, more heavily, and asks Alexia to get up from the floor. If Alexia's knee hurts, she says nothing and jumps up and down. "Ay, your knee," Alba grumbles but Alexia keeps going. She keeps going and going until she can't breathe and her lungs hurt. She keeps going because she believes it will rid her of her sadness, or at least hopes so. She hasn't stopped when Alba asks her to. A loud voice breaks the silence. "What are you doing?"

"Destroying everything. If I can't be with her, I don't want to play football. I don't want to walk, or see, or talk. I just don't want to live."

To Alba, this tells her two things. One is that her sister has gone batshit crazy. The other? Well, that is the solution. It's simple, really; one sentence, and Alexia will know what she has to do.

"You need to fix this.")

Heartbreak is ugly, but Alexia’s guilt is uglier.

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