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Tw red text/eye contact // Since today is James's Day I decided to let him borrow my account so he can speak to y'all! Of course I have to type everything he says (wheels don't translate very well as limbs), and he has a lot to talk about.
What can I say? I am the most fascinating engine on Sodor
Nobody calls you that James
They will once they start listening to me!
Anyways, when you work as long as I have you're bound to bear witness to some pretty events. Of course some of these events I didn't ask to be invited to buuut I still managed to come out on top
If you say that then why do you get mad when somebody mentions shoe laces?
THAT I won't be talking about! Ugh! Eighty years and you all still haven't let that go? I thought we moved on from this don't ruin this moment for me-!
Easy James it's all in good sport. Anyways, what should Tumblr expect for you?
I expect everyone to pay attention I don't like snoozers. I also will be taking any questions about my life on Sodor, what I do and all that. Just PLEASE don't be weird it's bad enough I have to deal with fans begging to ride in my cabin unauthorized! Oh and don't forget to send me pics of toy versions of me! I love seeing my likeness on merch, everyone should have a little piece of my splendidness.
Alright! So my inbox is free and James is all too eager to share his day off with y'all! Keep in clean and Have fun! - G&B
When I was about 12 my English teacher (love her, she's the best) at the time had us do creative writing in class. You may not believe this, but at 12 I wanted as little to do with writing as possible. We were doing some one on one discussions during the day, and it was my turn. She pulled me over to her desk and had me sit down like everyone else, and then she started talking. "You're doing well (irl name,) but I just can't shake the feeling that you're holding yourself back." I didn't know what she meant, so I said "what do you mean (her name?)" She then said "Something tells me you're only doing the bare minimum of each prompt I ask for your creative writing journal, but when I ask you to read and answer you do much more than that, how come?" I told her that creative writing to me was anything but creative, that it was hard for me to understand, that the answer was never there even when I looked for it, what point was there to write a story without a uniform answer? She then started with "there it is" knowing she had found the root of the problem. "So that's what you've been doing is it?" I confusededly nodded my head not knowing how this connected to anything. "Well (irl name,) I'm here to tell you that there ISN'T an answer." What? A story without an answer? Impossible. "But (her name,) there NEEDS to be an answer! How do I write a story without an answer? How do I write a story without a QUESTION!?" She then smiled and told me the one thing that would get me into creative writing for the rest of my life. "Sometimes there's just not an answer because there's no question. Creative writing is different (my name,) it's not about finding the answer to a pre-existing question, it's about taking something you want to see and creating it. Creative writing is supposed to be fun, not another assignment to study for only to forget it later. It's about taking your ideas, putting them on paper, and seeing everything fall into place. You don't even have to be GOOD at writing to write a story! Anyone can writing anything, the only person stopping them is themselves. You're stopping yourself because you're trying to look for an answer when there's no question to begin with. How about I change the rules?" She then gave me a "fake assignment." Not to be graded or studied for, but for my own personal enjoyment. My goal was to write a story, any story, outside of class by the end of the 2nd quarter. "Use characters from the video games you play or places based on real life, but try to make a story without any teachers involved." So I did. My 12 year old self sat down, and for a week straight I just wrote what I wanted. No answer, no question, just what I wanted. 2nd quarter break came and I had turned in my story the day before we left. I came back both excited and anxious to see what my teacher had to say. After class she stood me out in the hallway with the 2nd teacher in the class and they told me how proud they were of me. How I not only wrote a story, but one that was brilliantly crafted. How they'd never seen something like it. "2000 words coming from the child that doesn't like writing!? My goodness!" she exclaimed. I felt so proud of myself that day. "Do me a favour, and keep this story safe. Hold on to it so you can look back on it later. Maybe even share it with someone else when you're old enough." So I did. I posted The Whispering Bridge and shared it here. My first story ever written. Who knew something my 12 year old self wrote would hold up so well? Here I am still getting praised for the writing I'm doing. One of my other teachers said it was some of the best work she's ever seen, but I guess writing a 15,000 word autobiography warrents that. This post in itself feels like a story, though it's one that doesn't quite have an answer I'm afraid :)
Because it’s honestly……Yknow……anxiety causing? It makes me heart beat a little faster especially when it’s put into context like “reblog this!” Or anything similar
Lately I've been feeling paranoid around my mum. I've been used to her pendulum mood swings for ages, but now I'm just not. I feel like they've gotten worse, and that they're directed towards the two of us. She hates it when we do _____, why didn't we ______, making us do certain tasks in a condescending manner, making us hate being around her, almost everything really. It didn't use to be like this. It's gotten so bad that my younger sister doesn't even want to EAT in front of her. "You never eat enough," or "You need to try new foods," and "If you don't eat now I'm not feeding you later." All received at the age of nine. Once I overheard her saying "You're too young to be bulimic and anorexic and everything else" to her, but it was intended as a joke! I get paranoid at night. Sometimes I don't even go to the bathroom to change into nightwear/brush my teeth because I'm scared she might wake up and hear me. I've never been scared to leave my room before, but now I am sometimes. People tell me that these kinds of things only happen in abusive situations. I used to deny being abused, but now I have no idea. There was a post saying "If you have to question if you're being abused, it's possible that you are" but I don't know if it applies here. I don't think it's abuse, more of just paranoia because of past events. I don't like this. She takes all her anger out on us and then expects us to love her.
dont talk much abt this but this is a milestone worth celebrating! longest ive ever been sh free for since i started struggling w it as a teen. here's to another year ig!!