#this is what i created for the sake of harry' poor child to have a normal name

[the-royal-teacup]

For fuck sake, Harry! 🤦🏼‍♀️ Had the stories meant to ‘oust you from the royal family’ you would have been gone years ago. Do you seriously think the public could have had you ‘ousted’ from your family? You pathetic little idiot. Poor me, look at me, my life was so bad and the papers made it oh so much worse, wah, wah, wah!

Your family protected you, they loved you. They covered things up for you; including your disgusting behaviour and how obviously selfish and heinous you actually are!

This isn’t doing what you think it’s doing. You think it will make you look like the ‘victim’ you perpetually paint yourself as, instead it makes you look like a sad, pathetic, vile little man-child that hasn’t grown up and taken any responsibility for his own life and instead blames everyone else for the problems YOU and YOU alone created!

I just can’t. I am so sick and tired of hearing him whining about nothing or things that happened decades ago. Can things that happened years ago impact your life? Yes, of course they can. Do they still affect your life sometimes on the daily? Yes, again of course they can. But, do you know what you do? You don’t let it take over your life, you find ways to deal with it and you stop blaming those that caused you hurt and you find ways to move on and deal with it when those feelings rear their ugly head.

You don’t do what this idiot does, or you do if you’re constantly the ‘victim’ and a complete and utter toxic twat! Eventually, people get fed up of it and these people are left sad, alone and pathetic and they only have themselves to blame!

What are you going to do next Harry? Because people are fed up of hearing the same old shit just on a different day. You’re an entitled little man child that should have been told no more than once in his life, maybe then you wouldn’t have turned into whatever this mess is!

[cherryblossomsandhydrangeas]

Sk8 Rewatch Ep8

No, Adam, there is no one is the world who was created just for you. You’re looking for a doll/plaything, not a human being.

See, now that? That’s a moon. I don’t know what the hell that was from Ep6.

Wow, there are a lot of fruits at S.

Shadow: He’s [Reki] scared to race against Adam. *Laughs* Shadow, you’re the one who took him to the hospital and visibly sighed in the relief that he was okay.

Love how the people on the left are standing as far away from Adam as possible. Notice, how the people on Miya’s side are a bit closer as well since they’re not within Adam’s reach.

You know I think I’d be able to feel a bit more sympathy for Adam if his aunts version of love was the only one he knew. But that’s not what happened. He was loved by Tadashi, Kaoru, and Kojiro all normally, so it’s not like he doesn’t know other forms of love, this is all very much a choice.

Another reason I can’t feel sympathy is his pedophilia. Like, Adam believes that Langa is his Eve, right? Which means they’ll soon go to The Zone/Eden/The World Only For The Two Of Us. So, why is he excited for Miya to “bloom” so he can fall in love with him. Any sympathy you could have possibly gotten from me was destroyed with that comment.

Another post I’m gonna make is Cherry’s relationship with Carla and how fandom mischaracterizes it a bit.

I’m most definitely making a post on how Cherry couldn’t beat Adam, but he was able to match him. Like, I think it will be my life’s work for this blog. (other than the fanfics I’m planning)

Ah, Tadashi, this was you at your best. I’m so sorry about the ending you got.

Aww, my poor boys.

As a person who is also a little sister, I understand Koyomi on a fundamental level.

One thing I don’t like is how the show tries to present Ainosuke’s aunts as a consequence. Like, it’s formula is: Adam hurts someone or harasses a child, but he still has to go home to his aunts! Ainosuke’s aunts are not a consequence, they are his backstory. They don’t abuse him because of his actions, they are the cause of his mentality. The only consequence he might have gotten was jail for perjury and other illegal acts, but that was shoehorned away. Some of this can be explained by Sk8 being 12 eps long, thus not given enough time to add more fundamental scenes, but god, I would have loved at least one scene where Ainosuke does anything antagonistic, faces a consequence, and it isn’t brushed off by him or thrown away by the narrative, thus staying with him for the rest of the story.

I know Tadashi probably has/had romantic feelings for Ainosuke, but honestly I can’t see them as having anything other than a platonic or familial bond, or, at the very least an unrequited one where one has romantic feelings and the other has familial/platonic.

One day I am going to make a post about how Tadashi was abused by the Shindos (including Ainosuke) just as much as Ainosuke himself was.

Shout out to Joe for doing the work Reki’s father cannot since he has to work away from home all the time!

Mom of the year! Hasegawa Nanako!

Ngl, I want Harry’s backstory. My man’s made it to the tournament no problem. Note: he had to have been the second person from Cherry’s bracket to win since we never saw anybody else cross during that run.

Sometimes I feel like Adam dislikes Joe. Like he goes “...Joe” because he’s Langa’s opponent instead of him, but I wonder if that bled over into their adolescence. Like, he wrote Joe’s name on the 3 of diamonds. I can’t help but wonder if he was also subtly calling him a third wheel like he does Reki later.

Shout out to Joe for doing the work Langa’s father cannot since he’s in a coffin six feet under in Canada!

I actually like how Joe still has a sliver of hope left for Adam, even though he probably wants to punch him more for Cherry’s sake than his own, he still cares for his old friend a tiny bit.

#sk8 rewatch #sk8 cherry blossom #sk8 the infinity #sk8 #sk8 joe #sk8 ad*m #sk8 reki #sk8 langa #sk8 tadashi #sk8 shadow #sk8 koyomi #sk8 nanako #sk8 miya #sk8 oliver

[billconrad]

Ethics Hinder My Writing

    Five years ago, I created a report at Sundstrand and uncovered issues with our product. My boss asked me to change the conclusions, and I refused. To get around this dilemma, I re-wrote (faked) the conclusions, and somebody else submitted it under their name. Side note. Does this make me a ghostwriter?

    That was the only time I compromised my work ethic. Incidentally, Sundstrand had extensive ethics training that everybody blatantly ignored. But what about my boss? He was fantastic, and upper management goals directed his choices. What about my coworkers? They said, “It’s what the boss wants. Just do it.”

    The incident conflicted me. It was a minor lie, but my core personality hated lying. Before choosing to have a coworker submit the report, I considered quitting. Looking back, the whole thing was a minor fudge because of unrealistic requirements, and I should have been less rigid. Yet, the incident still simmers in the back of my bonkers mind.

    I recently discussed the incident with a friend, which inspired me to think about my ethics. I came to an unexpected conclusion: I am a deeply ethical person. I thought my ethics were ordinary or perhaps a little below average. Sure, I do not steal or abuse people, but that is the baseline. I am not a saint, and there are people I know with higher ethics. However, my self-evaluation revealed that I have a higher sense of ethics than my peers.

    I think it is a good thing to have high ethics. Society needs responsible people, and I am a trusted friend. Yet, high ethics presents a problem with my writing.

    My good characters have strong morals, and the bad ones, meaning that even the bad ones have distinct ethical lines they never cross. A child abuser? Not in my book. Why? I feel it is essential for readers to connect with the bad characters as if they could be bad people in their own lives. The core of my problem is that I cannot make the bad character too bad, and the good character must be outstanding. For example, no character would ever use a racial slur. Yet, I know such terms are essential for authors to rouse the reader. They show ignorance and a lack of respect. And let’s not forget that a character/real person can use racial slurs and learn they are wrong. While true, I will never use such terms in life or writings.

    Such ethical choices limit the story’s dynamic range and prevent me from ever creating an anti-hero. So, how do I write within my ethics? I mentally set a plotline and subject limit. This choice excludes horror stories where characters are poorly treated for the sake of being mistreated. My evil characters need a reason to be awful; they cannot simply be appalling. So, my villains never benefit from poor behavior.

    Can I tell myself that writing is just fantasy? Go ahead, write a raw, gritty, and unsavory story. Readers will understand; they know the definition of fiction. The “Texas Chainsaw Massacre” author has killed; they only wrote a fictional story. This kind of story is a bridge too far for somebody like me. However, I appreciate stories that break ethical grounds, such as the Deadpool and Mad Max franchises.

    Does this mean that my books will always be limited? Regrettably, yes. A large portion of literature and character types will be off-limits to me. Is this bad? Skilled writers challenge themselves to develop fantastic plots. They apply shock value and add excessive aggression to get readers out of their comfort zone. I know what my writing could be, but I have to live with myself. I do not want the sum of my achievements to be unethical, and I would much rather be a complete failure than be known as the author who created the award-winning Hannibal Lecter. Yet, I understand Hannibal Lecter is a fantastic character. Thomas Harris can be proud of that sadistic creation, but that character is not for me.

    Since my life examination, I have better understood my ethics and how they affect my writing. I will push my envelope in the future. A tiny bit. I think there are many good ethical areas in my plot wheelhouse.

    You’re the best -Bill

    December 23, 2023

    Hey book lovers, I published four. Please check them out:

    Interviewing Immortality. A dramatic first-person psychological thriller that weaves a tale of intrigue, suspense, and self-confrontation.

    Pushed to the Edge of Survival. A drama, romance, and science fiction story about two unlikely people surviving a shipwreck and living with the consequences.

    Cable Ties. A slow-burn political thriller that reflects the realities of modern intelligence, law enforcement, department cooperation, and international politics.

    Saving Immortality. Continuing in the first-person psychological thriller genre, James Kimble searches for his former captor to answer his life’s questions.

    These books are available in soft-cover on Amazon and eBook format everywhere.

#writing #ethics #story #character development

[llendrinall]

As we all know, Charlie Weasley could have played for Britain had he not gone off chasing dragons. There’s a lot of gold that comes with being a good international player. What do you think it would have been like if the Weasleys were doing better financially?

Frankly, I don’t think things would change all that much. Not everybody is a Ronaldo or a Messi (to draw parallels with football/soccer) making really stupid amounts of money. At least during the first few years, until Charlie became a Big Name, he would make money, maybe even tons of money, but I doubt it would be enough to change things significantly.

Mostly I think Charlie would be very unhappy and Percy’s break with the family would be much more intense (what! After the way he behaved in canon? Yes, more than that. Percy would be the next Charlie, getting a job far away and visiting home rarely).

The question here is: why are the Weasleys poor? There is a quick and dirty answer, which is that JKR wanted a rich=bad, poor= good - noble, structure. But she didn’t build a reason as to whyit is so. (There is also no reason why the Malfoys are rich, but money has inertia so we can half buy it). Thus, she accidentally made the Weasleys come across as reeeeally financially irresponsible and the creators of their own poverty.

Let’s look at the money. Supposedly, Hogwarts is free for all students, which makes sense because a significant portion of those students will me muggleborns and I can’t imagine how that conversation would go with their parents (“Your child is gifted! Magical! Now let us take them for 10 months of the year and give us money”). Hogwarts budget must come from the Ministry and the expenses are supervised by the Board of Governors. This, together with how big the Ministry infrastructure seems to be, makes me think that taxes in the wizarding world must be pretty high.

(US readers, double whatever number you are thinking).

Let’s say… 40% of income at the very least. That’s a big chunk for the Weasleys, considering they only have one salary. Since Arthur is overlooked for promotions, we can guess his salary isn’t high. He is head of a department, but it’s a joke department.

The books hint that the Weasleys own the land they live in. If they were renting the Burrow, and it would be hilariousif their landlord were Malfoy, then the house should be in a better state and they wouldn’t be responsible for the gnomes or the ghoul. Since there was no dramatic subplot about Malfoy trying to kick them out, I will assume they own the house and the land. Maybe they have a mortgage on it? One with ridiculous high rates, for argument’s sake.

So that’s most of the money accounted for. What other expenses do they have? According to the ONS the average UK household, after taxes, has a budget as follows (simplified):

Housing (rent, interest and upkeep) – 33%

Food and utilities – 20%

Transport – 14%

Recreation – 12%

Holidays – 11%

Restaurants – 7%

Other – 3%

Let’s say that the mortgage has an insane rate, so 40% of the budget, after taxes, is going there. But we can scratch transportation right away since they have apparition and side apparition and, more importantly, they have nowhere to go. The kids are homeschooled and the one person in the household who has to go to work everyday, can simply apparate right before the office. So that 14% of transportation can go to the housing budget.

Next, food. The Weasleys have many more children than average so the food expense should be higher. On the other hand, they have a lot of land. Supposedly a plot of land of 24x30m (80x100 feet or, for the Americans, about the size of a small Starbucks, the kind that is integrated inside a business) is enough to feed one person for a year in an exclusively plant-based diet. My experience is that a plot of 10x10 meters (32x32 feet or a small Subway shop) can feed a family of 4 if they supplement with eggs and milk and they are smart with the crop distribution.

If the Weasleys kept hens and an orchard, they could keep the food costs low enough that the large family size wouldn’t matter. Plus, during the teenage years, when the calorie demand is higher, the kids are in Hogwarts 10 out of 12 months of the year.

This still leaves them with a very small budget. But considering the only thing magic can’t produce is a) food b) a property deed, almost everything else can be procured with a spell. Furniture wear and tear? A reparo will take care of that. Kids are growing and we need bigger beds? Transfiguration. Clothes? Buy the fabric and use a spell. Maybe it won’t be pretty, but it will be cheap. There will be many luxuries they can’t afford. No eating out, no holidays, no fancy broomsticks. And there are some unavoidable expenses, like school supplies (although books could be reused). Although with the exception of Ginny, there are 2-3 years between children so they have time to save. The moment a kid reaches Hogwarts age they have to make a big investment of wand, cauldron, etc. and then they can write them off. The high taxes also mean they have services like free healthcare and free education with board and room.

It’s a difficult situation. But notice that it’s one that I have created myself. We don’t know if they have a mortgage and we don’t know the tax duties. I’m just coming up with reasons for the expenses while not giving them supplemental income, like Molly selling preserves and whatnot.

I still think that things shouldn’t be so tight that they can’t afford a new wand for each kid. Yet Ron went to Hogwarts with Charlie’s old wand and spent a whole academic year with his wand broken. The Weasleys should had been able to afford a wand. Sure, they just bought Ginny’s school package, but Harry gave her some of the books. It might set them back, it might mean no new robes for the family, but they ought to have that money. Books you can reuse and hope the content is pretty much the same. Wands, you cannot. With broken wands, you are putting your child’s education and even life in danger.

Ron didn’t get the new wand because it was useful for the story that his wand was broken, but the internal logic of the story speaks of extreme economic irresponsibility. Despite all the excuses I tried to come up with (high taxes, high mortgage, Molly is working all day at the garden) not giving Ron a new wand points at a situation of extreme financial ignorance.

So, if Charlie went the Quidditch route the Weasleys would do a bit better, they might pay off their debt, but I don’t think they would be able to grow savings because they simply don’t know how. Charlie would have the added stress of not only performing well in his job but also being the main bread-winner for the whole family. Percy, who is quite observant, would have constant fights about what he considers unnecessary luxuries. He would resent his father even more and he would accept the first job that took him out of the country. The twins would probably resent Ron and Ginny a bit, since they would be the ones to experience having new things.

Charlie would have to make truly astounding amounts of money so that his earnings overcome the family’s blundering of the budget.

#asks #weasley family #hypothetical finances #textpost

[muffindaddystyles]

HIP DISLOCATION AT FIRST SIGHT.

Summary: where you're a waitress at Harry's favourite friends-hangout spot, he secretly likes you and you're having a rough day.

Warning: angst and fluff.

You're a beaming sparrow rolling onto balls of your feet from one booth to another taking orders and being sure of customer's satisfaction at it's peak. Sure, managing a five to nine waitress job isn't anyone's dream but paying tuition fees and bills can make anyone work.

Harry loves to be at this resturant you work; perhaps there's something 𝒎𝒐𝒓𝒆 he loves rather than goofing around with his friends at late hours in any of the booths in far corner.

When he first came here it was for a date who stood him up and you wouldn't lie that you kinda tiny bit of manifested for it but went through a broken heart seeing Harry's sad eyes after him lingering to that one hope that his date would show up.

He was relieved that you helped him at that time with you again and again popping your head just to ask him, if he needs any refills for which he would just kindly quip 'thanks love, bu' it's already tipplin' out from rim.' Or you askin' him if he'll like to fill his belly with some appetizers? Poor him didn't ate anythin' from menu just waiting for his date that day.

From that you got to know he's such a gentleman who got his heart stepped on.

He found you enticing. So, fuckin' beaming even with all of the customers tantrums. Them fussing around for the mess their kids created and Harry couldn't take his eyes away from the slight curve your body molded into when you walked away from him.

With his few more visits you got accustomed that what he likes and the one favourite dish of yours from the resturant you recommended him one time, he licked the plate clean giggling coyly at your reaction.

But today it's different. He's chatting around with his friends, they look super chill, comfy clothes, relaxed postures and a train of light conversation that never seems to end.

You were admiring them from your spot waiting for the tray of food for the table 201 ready to take Harry's and his friend's order after that, suddenly a whine escaping from your lips and you bended your calve to soothe out the drastic pain in your hip-bone.

Zoe one of the hostess gave you a sympathetic smile handing you the tray, "hurtin' like a bitch." You hissed to her toes curling. You've been having this pain for like a week but whatever exercises you're doing it wouldn't budge to ease out.

Maintaining a decent gait you headed towards the last table of your shift before closing, smiling at all of them sweetly, whatever you did not to lock your gaze with Harry it anyhow happened by Cupid's wishes.

"Hi everyone, I'm your waitress and will be takin' your orders." You chirped taking out the sequin notepad from the front pocket of your lace apron and Harry's friends couldn't help but to notice how the tips of his ears turned red, eyes glassy with adoring sheen and lips quirking up shyly.

You noted down everyone's littlest of details turning your head down towards Harry, your voice immediately cooing into a soft one softer than you usually use to be polite with costumers.

"And Harry you'll have your usual?" He cleared his throat coughing into his elbow and everyone stifled a fond laugh just for his sake, "yes, please." His please was so gentle that it melted you over the pastel mauve tiles almost making you forget your pain.

The moment you spinned with your back behind them Harry's loving female friend pinched his cheek, "looks like someone gotta girl crush."

Everyone was chatting but Harry's mind and heart was all for you, it didn't slip out from his sheer notice that you're having it rough today; ponytail loose, cheeks flushed not with the warmth you feel from Harry's presence but with the pain zapping in your leg like an electric shock.

His eyes stayed glued to the way your nails coated into hot red nail polish aren't drumming against the counter as they usually do when you wait for the order instead they're clutching around the edges tightly paling your knuckles and now Harry feels concerned.

Another contraction but you didn't startled yourself. No way you're gonna get made fun of yourself infront of Harry, it would be so embarrassing.

Harry peers up at you with a frown when you heads to their table for refills but you didn't meet his eyes. What his friends will say? That you're a cheap waitress drooling for a bambi eyed, hickorey curls, sunny guy.

But damn when your hands wavered while lifting the jug to pour a glass of water, and you sucked your bottom lip to swallow your agonising gasp Harry wanted to lurch from his seat and ask you what's happening because it's frustrating at this point looking you being so wrecked.

You weakly smiled at all of them. Harry wants to stop you by grabbing your hand but he wants to respect you and doesn't want him to cross his boundaries.

You're back with a tray loaded of food and you're putting plates onto the table when an unbearable contraction of pain twitched inside you badly and you cried out a scream of horror, the tray slipping from your hand to the far corner of the table. The pain's so much your breath has got stuck in your chest causing you too see white.

"Y/n!" Harry panics hot on his feet scooping your side in his arms when you lurch forward unconsciously, even the tears aren't falling from your eyes stayin' at the bayline and you cry out in spurts of breaths dropping Harry's heart to his arse when he got the indication you couldn't breath.

"C-can't...b-" Harry immediately rubbed your back in soothing circles whispering with his honey rasp, "breath fo' me yeah, darlin'?". "S'alright. Jus' breath alon' me." You nod and everyone watches you in shock pity. At Harry's countdown you exhaled and inhaled breaths, his friends are in awe a love-at-first-sight, baby-steps love story is unraveling infront of them.

Harry makes you sit at his seat and you giggle shamefully breathily eyes glossy, "Thank you Harry. Can you..can you call zoe for me? She's right behind the counter." The words burning inside your throat and you're expecting another zap.

Harry's a bit hurt. He doesn't even know why! He wants be the one to take care of you but why you aren't gettin' it, why!?

You want to apologise to his friends but all the words just vanishes when zoe comes padding hurriedly Harry behind her with ever sad eyes, "bubs what happened?"

You're about to speak but another contradiction like someone's pulling at your vein and you're a goner but Harry's by your side holding your hand ignoring the twitch from your hardcore grip as if you'll fracture his hand too, "ah fuck! I think so I broke my hip. I'm fuckin' sure, it feels like dying." You scream jerking your leg and even though Harry's friends shouldn't look at you two with so much awement at the moment but they're still doing so because fuck they all are planning the same sight of both of you at the time of your labour because it may seems like you're popping out Harry's child outta your vagina at the moment.

"M'takin' ye' to hospital." Harry says with stern firmness in his voice because fuck boundaries he can't see you in such pain, "s'okay zoe can you take me to hospital?" You hissed writhing but Harry cuts you off. he's loosing his shit, "I don't care, can't see ya like this lemme help ye'."

Next thing Harry's helping your limpy body outside into the backseat of his car and the whole ride he's beside you one of his friend driving the car, you were a blushing mess at some second but another arching your spine so hard and Harry's instantly wrapping you up in his arms whispering sweet nothings through your tears.

You've gone through a little surgery and it's hour after you're shifted into a room that Harry takes a sigh of relief, you groan fluttering your eyes open the very first sight of yours is Harry into his yellow jumper and plaid trouser looking a tad exhausted.

You're on anesthetic and you're sloppy.

"Hi love feelin' kay? You went through a tiny surgery." He informs you but you pouts in response ignoring everything coming straight to the point, sober you would have never got guts.

"A-are ye' me boyfrien'..?" Your words are bit lisped and poppish, Harry chuckles swiping his thumb at your forehead.

"No' yet. Will be if ye' wan' me to." You bobbed your head like a good little girl observing your odd surroundings and fat tears sticks to your cheeks.

"What happened buns? Should I call doctor? Y'hurtin somewhere?" But you denied lower lip swelling for no reason or maybe medication.

"I've so mu-sh uni work to do, an' I've nothin' to wear on our date." Harry giggles wiping away your tears kissing the apples of your cheeks, stroking your head and you mewled like a kitten making Harry's throat go dry.

"No worries bunny. We'll go on a date whenever you'll want to." He just wants to shower you in his undeniable affectionate kisses but he's holding back, "fo' now go to rest. I'll have m'sober bunny peeking from the meadow in mornin' yeh?"

"Promise me you wouldn't leave?" You asks with doe eyes and he just wants to smash his lips to yours. Fuck. He waited so long.

"Did I, before'?" He asks you kissing your forehead gently trying not to irritate the plaster of your hip. You shook your head tucking your chin inside the comforter, "then I wouldn't even now."

In the morning you find your fingers buried into soft mess of curls and he was already up before you could try to even move your finger, "Harry?" Your voice hoarse from the drowsiness and he cups your cheeks asking if you're feeling dehydrated but you chuckled shaking your head.

"I feel high." He tucks his bottom lip inside his mouth at the fact you look more ethereal from this close, "high from anesthesia." He quips.

"Do you remember anythin' from last night?" He's anxious now how he'll bring to actually ask you out, "I do, from me litreally shouting like a lady bout to give birth to crying for not havin' any dress for our date." He's amused not just at the fact your memory didn't slipped but that you're more chatty and bubbly outta your waitress persona.

"Then it's solid?" He asks timidly and you nod humming coarsely leaning to peck his lips but he grabs you by neck not letting you pull back, thumbs all stroking, mouth moanin' for you and eyes closed into bliss.

"Wanted to kiss ye' so bad from so long." He deepens the kiss not caring if any doctor comes marching right now.

"Now I'm all yours to kiss. Kiss me whenever you want to."

#fluff #cute harry #harry styles blurb #hsh

[january3693]

So, I wrote a thing about Remus and Sirius fighting with Dumbledore over custody of Harry post POA. I got just a few lines of dialogue and like a snippet of a scene stuck in my head, demanding that I write it out. It doesn’t feel like a complete thing, like a real one shot or something, so I’m not going to post it to AO3 right now. I’m not entirely sure what’s going on here, but I wanted to make it an AU where Sirius is now free (because that’s my favorite canon divergence) and has worked things out with Remus and has already absconded with Harry. Also, Lyall Lupin is here, because I head canon him as being both alive and being a cranky badass, and I love him (also Remus, Sirius, and Harry are staying with Lyall because we all know Remus’s cottage isn’t fit for reasonable human habitation, and fuck Grimmauld Place). Again, I don’t know what I’m doing with this, maybe it belongs to a longer fic, but if so I probably won’t be writing that fic for a while yet. Until then, it’s just a random little scene I felt the desire to write.

(It’s long, so I put it below a Keep Reading line)

They Apparated from the Burrow back to Wales rather than take the Floo. It was supposed to be a quick stop only, just to grab a few things before spending the next two nights back at Remus’s cottage. Remus had suggested it, feeling that without the mitigating influence of Harry in the house the tensions between Lyall and Sirius might blossom into open warfare. Better for them all that they all give each other a little space.

Then Lyall met them at the door, a grim scowl on his face and a large mug of coffee in hand. “You have a visitor in the kitchen,” he said tightly.

“Ah, I thought we might sometime soon,” Remus replied with a sigh.

“Bollocks,” Sirius added unhelpfully.

At least Dumbledore had waited until Harry was off to the World Cup with the Weasleys. This was not going to be a pleasant conversation for anyone involved, Remus imagined.

He could feel the storm already gathering strength as he and Sirius followed Lyall back through the house to the kitchen. Sirius had been doing so well controlling his temper, but that had been for Harry’s sake, Remus knew. They had both held their tongues over the past week every time Harry let some new, horrifying kernel of information slip out about his life with the Dursleys.

Harry wasn’t here though, and Remus had been anticipating an explosion of Sirius’s fury and horror once they were safely back at his cottage. Hell, Remus had planned to add his own rage to the mix. They weren’t going to get their chance to scream their frustrations into the void though. At least, not before they were forced to have a long conversation with Albus Dumbledore. A conversation that might very easily devolve into shouting.

Remus winced; pitting Sirius against Dumbledore was very nearly the definition of an unstoppable force meeting and immovable object.

Dumbledore sat at the kitchen table, sipping tea from a delicate porcelain cup that had not come from the cabinet above Lyall’s sink. Knowing his father, Lyall probably hadn’t offered Dumbledore any sort of refreshment. Honestly, Remus was surprised his father had let the headmaster into the house in the first place.

Looking up at them, Dumbledore smiled. It seemed so warm, so genuine, that Remus almost believed this might not be the fight he’d expected. Maybe Dumbledore just had a few reasonable concerns that they could smooth over and come to an easy, agreed upon solution to Harry’s custody situation.

Then he remembered all the letters he’d sent, the pleas to be allowed to visit Harry, or send him letters, or even get updates on how he was doing. Dumbledore had answered so politely and sympathetically, always cloaking his very firm no in kindness.

“Good afternoon, Remus, Sirius,” Dumbledore said with a smile. “Would you like a biscuit?” He gestured to a tin of iced lemon biscuits that he’d clearly brought with him. Remus’s sweet tooth had come straight from his mother; Lyall had no taste for chocolate or other sweets and rarely kept them in the house.

“No,” Sirius said sharply.

“No thank you,” Remus added a little more politely.

Dumbledore’s smile never faltered. “Ah, well, we have some very important things to discuss then, namely regarding Harry.” He gestured to the chairs opposite him. Lyall harrumphed around a sip of his coffee. Sirius and Remus both sat though, perhaps some inborn obedience lingered after all these years.

To Remus’s surprise, his father refilled his coffee mug and settled back against the counter, ready to watch the show.

“Dad, could you give us a few minutes?” Remus asked.

Lyall crossed his arms over his chest, a stubborn tilt to his chin. “You can talk as long as you’d like, but this is my house and I won’t be thrown out of my own bloody kitchen for anyone or anything.”

“That’s quite all right, Remus,” Dumbledore said politely. “As the only parent present, I’m sure your father has valuable insight into the rigors and complications of raising a child.”

“You want my insight?” Lyall asked, nostrils flaring. “Ignoring the rest of this clusterfuck, you should have given the boy to Remus thirteen years ago.” 

That caught them all by surprise. Remus let out a long breath and couldn’t seem to draw in a new one. It was a thought he’d had himself over the years. For the most part, he’d been able to silence it by telling himself that Harry was better off with the Dursleys. That they would be able to provide for him, care for him better than Remus ever would have been able to—poor, jobless, grieving mess that he had been after the war. Then he’d met the teenaged Harry and had slowly learned how much of a lie that had been. A lie he’d told himself, but one that Dumbledore had corroborated in his own gentle way.

Even Lyall, who had once cautioned Remus about how difficult it would be for him to ever have or raise children, believed Harry would have been better off with Remus than the Dursleys.

“He’s damned right,” Sirius snapped. He turned to give Lyall a solemn nod. They might not get along, but on this front the two of them were in complete agreement. “Lily was estranged from her sister for good reasons. If I wasn’t able to take Harry in, James and Lily would have wanted him to go to Remus, and you know it, Albus.”

“Dad, Sirius…” Remus began with a sigh.

“They could have come here,” Lyall said before Remus could get another self-defeating word out. “I’d have taken them both in in an instant. We might not have had a lot, but I was always able to keep a roof over my family’s head and food on the table. Harry would have been cared for…loved.”

“But he would not have been safe,” Dumbledore interjected.

“And what precisely is that supposed to mean?” Lyall growled.

Dumbledore sighed. “I meant no slights against either Remus or yourself, Lyall,” the headmaster assured them. “Rather, I was speaking about protections provided by your house.”

Lyall’s hackles rose almost as much at the insult to his home as they had over the affront to his person. Before he could curse or yell at the headmaster though, Remus jumped back into the conversation.

“This isn’t a permanent situation,” Remus insisted. “My cottage is too small for three people, but we’re making other arrangements.”

“I was planning to have a new house built on my uncle’s property,” Sirius added. “It’s secluded and the land is already well protected. We can add as many spells and charms to the house as you see fit, Albus, but we can’t send Harry back to live with those…those…toerags!”

Remus had to bite his lip to keep from laughing as Sirius dragged out Lily’s favorite childhood insult to keep from swearing. There was nothing funny about the sadly immovable expression on Dumbledore’s face. It radiated understanding and empathy, but insisted their arguments had not changed his mind.

“Harry is protected by powerful magic while he lives with his aunt and uncle,” Dumbledore said patiently. “Protections I’m afraid neither of you will be able to replicate. Lily sacrificed herself to save Harry’s life, and that sacrifice created a lingering protection in Harry’s very blood. It’s why Voldemort cannot bear to touch him without pain. It also enabled me to cast a powerful charm that was sealed when Petunia Dursley accepted her nephew into her home.”

“A bond of blood charm,” Lyall raised a questioning eyebrow at Dumbledore. “That’s the charm you’re referring to, isn’t it?”

“It is,” Dumbledore said with a nod. “You’re familiar with it?”

Lyall snorted. “I married a Muggle woman and raised a son with lycanthropy during a time when a maniac and his followers would have happily killed the lot of us for either of those things. I’m very familiar with protection spells.” Remus resisted the urge to flinch at the reminder that his condition had put his parents at risk for years. His father didn’t sound bitter about it though. He actually seemed rather proud.

“That’s how I know you’re feeding these two a cartload of erumpent shite,” Lyall added.

Dumbledore blinked surprised blue eyes at Lyall’s proclamation.

“There’s no such thing as a perfect protection charm,” Lyall continued. “If there was everyone would use it, and we’d all have nothing to worry about. Bonds of blood can be powerful protection, especially since the circumstances required to create them are rare and not easily replicated.” Lyall explained. “They’ve got one hell of a weak spot though. The protections are only as powerful as the bonds between the living, not the blood of the sacrifice. I can think of half a dozen ways to undo one, especially if the boy’s relatives are half the wankstains my son and Black here claim they are.”

“They’re worse,” Sirius muttered, though no one paid him any mind.

Dumbledore frowned. He might have been prepared for Remus and Sirius and all their emotional arguments, but he obviously hadn’t counted on Lyall. “Petunia Dursley knowingly activated the charm when she took Harry into her home and care. She accepted the bond.”

Sirius looked ready to snap at the word care, but Remus squeezed his shoulder to stop him. Their anger wouldn’t win this fight, but if his father knew something that might…

Lyall glowered at Dumbledore as if the man had personally challenged him. “The boy’s aunt might have taken him in and activated the charm, but either one of them can break it easily. Bonds of blood are finicky magic, full of loopholes, technicalities, and with plenty of ways for a person to break the charm completely by accident.” He set his mug down so he could tick points off on his fingers. “One wrong word spoken during an argument could undo the whole thing. If this aunt ever told Harry to ‘get out’ in the wrong tone, or if Harry ever claimed his aunt’s house wasn’t his home—Poof! There goes your fancy charm. And how far would you say these Dursleys would go to protect the boy? From what Harry himself said they don’t seem to like him much, let alone love him.”

Dumbledore sighed. “Reluctant or not, she still took him in and—”

“And what would she do if someone were to threaten her own son? If some shady bastard came up to her on the street—away from that protected house—and said ‘we’ll kill your own boy if you don’t give us the other one,’ or if they offered her money—a fortune in exchange for an unwanted, unloved nephew? That’s the flaw of blood bond charms, almost similar to the Fidelius that caused you lot so much grief. The bond relies on trust, on love. Without that it’s fragile as a thread.”

“The Dursleys wouldn’t suffer a hangnail to protect Harry, and you know it,” Sirius snarled at Dumbledore.

“Are you even sure the charm’s still active?” Remus asked. “Your protections saved Harry his first year, we’re not denying that, but a lot has happened between Harry and the Dursleys since then, none of it good.”

“Most of it abusive,” Sirius added under his breath.

The headmaster hesitated. He looked caught between frustration, guilt, and exasperation. Remus felt a stab of fury. His father had poked these holes in Dumbledore’s plan in less than five minutes, Dumbledore himself had to have considered these things over the last decade.

“I understand that it might have been the best option at the time given…everything else that happened,” Remus said diplomatically. He didn’t want to be the damn peacekeeper here, but it obviously wasn’t going to be Sirius or even his father. If pushed they were both likely to snap and shove right back. “However, things have changed, Albus. Sirius and I want Harry. We’d both die to protect him. That has to be worth something.”

“Especially when you consider Harry doesn’t want to live with the Dursleys. He’d known me for all of an hour—half of which he spent thinking I’d helped kill his parents—and he asked if he could move in with me. What sort of life must he have had that moving in with an escaped felon he barely knew sounded like a step up? What did they—”

Sirius’s diatribe choked off in the middle of his sentence. He closed his eyes and sucked in a deep shaky breath. Remus opened his mouth to take up where his partner had left off, to argue, to fight, to rage even, but the words caught in his throat as Sirius’s hand settled atop his tightly balled fist. When Sirius’s eyes opened again they fixed on the table before him, but Remus could tell he wasn’t actually seeing it.

When Sirius spoke the anger was gone from his voice, replaced by something soft and frighteningly brittle. “My family’s house was very well protected. There were truly ancient runes inscribed in the foundations, and generations of Blacks had layered spells and charms into every brick and stone and floorboard—my father was practically obsessed with it toward the end of his life. It was unplottable, invisible to Muggles, had anti-apparition and concealment charms, anything you could think of. I was as safe growing up there as a child could ever be…” Sirius pulled his gaze away from the table and his grey eyes locked with Dumbledore’s blue. “…From everything outside of those walls.”

Remus’s fist unclenched beneath Sirius’s hand, and he turned his palm up to clasp his partner’s fingers. Sirius gripped them tight in return. To that day, Remus was certain he still didn’t know the entirety of what had happened to Sirius within Grimmauld Place. He’d gleaned pieces of the puzzle over the years, some from Sirius himself, others from his own observations and suppositions. It was more than enough to know the terrible shape of what Sirius had suffered for sixteen years, if not all of the details.

“I made mistakes before,” Sirius continued. “Believe me, I know every facet of them intimately. I can’t undo them, but I would give my life to keep Harry safe. I would kill to protect him. So would Remus. I will do anything to protect him…anything except stand by and allow the very people who are supposed to care for him, to love him, hurt him in any way.”

His voice was still quiet, but there was a vicious passion beneath the words that spoke worlds. He had already spent twelve years in hell, but Remus didn’t doubt for one second that Sirius would storm straight back into Azkaban or Tartarus itself if it would spare Harry even a minute of suffering.

Remus squeezed the hand holding his. If it came to that, Sirius would not be going alone this time.

Sirius didn’t say another word, but his eyes stayed locked with Dumbledore’s, and—for the first time Remus could ever recall—it was Dumbledore who blinked first. It made him wonder how many pieces of the puzzle the headmaster had put together himself over the years, both about Sirius’s childhood and Harry’s own.

It wasn’t a surrender though. Remus could read as much in the way Dumbledore sighed and steepled his hands in front of him.

Lyall cleared his throat, drawing everyone’s attention. “You’re all forgetting something,” he said quietly. His eyes darted to Sirius for a moment, wary, but with a new level of respect. “It’s Harry’s life you’re debating, he’s fourteen years old, more than old enough to understand the risks and have a say in this decision.”

#harry potter au #harry potter fanfic #semi-finished #maybe #I don't really know #sirius black #remus lupin #harry potter #albus dumbledore #lyall lupin #canon divergence #sirius is free #sirius and remus take harry away from the dursleys #tw: mentions of child abuse

[littlemisssquiggles]

*fluffs you* Uhm... Any thoughts on Chapter 5 yet? You know I don't mind spoilers :)

Apologies for the late response! Say no more Mizu. I gotchu fam! If I’m beingcompletely honest with you, I don’t have much to say about this episode mostly in the sense that, even after processing it for an entire day, I’m still riding the high of it. I will say overall that I enjoyed this episode so I think for the most part, this time I’m just only going to mention the two key parts that I enjoyed the most about this episode, if that’s okay:

JNPR RISES

First of all, as you’ve probably seen by now from my blog—a wild cute farm boy was sighted in this episode. Naturally this made this squiggle meister very very happy. 

Going in CH5 especially following the last episode, what I mostly wantedout of this new chapter on Oscar’s side was mostly to see him show up. I honestly felt like a mom whose kid went away to summer camp and hasn’t seen them in weeks. I just wanted to see Oscar to be reminded that he’s still in the PLOT (unlike certain other characters *coughsMariacoughs*). But I ended up getting more than I bargained for.

This episode showed Oscar teaming up with JNR in an all fours team battle against an Atlesian huntsmen team I’ve been waiting to make a comeback since V3. 

RWBY BROUGHT BACK THE FNKI! 

Seriously it was SO GREAT seeing Neon and Flynt returning. I was worried that with our heroes spending time mostly with the Ace Ops that we weren’t going to catch them at all. 

Luckily Eddy Rivas came in clutch for us FNKI fans this episode. Myfavourite part of CH5 was the fight between FNKI and JNR with Oscar. It wasso good. Seeing their interactions on the battlefield. Hearing Neon roast Nora and having Nora Harry Pottering herself around the battlefield trying to catch her was awesome.

Since when can Nora use the hammer to fly around like a witch on a broomstick!? This is the first time we’ve seen that and I really really love it! Need more hammer Witch Nora!

Watching Jaune fight Flynt and Ren fight Ivory while Oscar fought the giantKobalt and seeing all three of them kick ass. The fact that FNKI lost to JNPRmade me smile because a) it shows how much JNR has indeed improved since FNKI met them during the Vytal Festival, b) it highlights how much Oscar has been improving on his own without Oz and c) it shows how well Oscar works with JNR.

Seriously this scene gave me more hope for Oscar inevitably joining JNR to revive JNPR because that’s something that this squiggle meister has been hoping for since V5. For me, one thing I’ve always wanted for Oscar is for him to gain his own place on the team beyond his role as Ozma’s current descendant in the cycle and Ozpin’s successor. 

Hence why I fell in love with the theory of him joining JNR to revive their huntsmen team. 

While they’ve done well on their own up until this point, admittedly JNRhas been incomplete since Pyrrha’s death. And one thing I’ve always appreciated about the JNR gang is how they always felt like a family. 

I know Team RWBY is our core protagonist team but I’ve always felt more attached to JNPR and I believed them to have the stronger family rapport than RWBY. 

This is why I was hoping Oscar would eventually join them. Become a part of their little family and give Oscar three brothers-in-arms that he can count on both off and on the battlefield.

I felt like Oscar would fit well with JNR. Not just because they were short one member and his last name coincidentally provides that missing “P” from JNR…but mostly because I figured Oscar would complement Jaune, Nora and Ren just much as Pyrrha did once before. Thus making the young farm boy turned little barn prince fit well within JNR. 

I always liked the idea of Oscar making JNR feel whole again and reviving their group through his growing bond and comradery with each member. 

Beyond that, I wanted Oscar to experience what it was like to be a partof huntsmen team since part of the enjoyment of RWBY for me was watching these characters grow close to one another over the seasons. 

Becoming teammates then friends and then to a greater extent—a family. I wanted the same experience for Oscar because right now, he could really use that. 

He could use more friends. He could use a family. People he could happily call his brothers and sisters. His people and I think JNR can provide that him. No, I know JNR can provide him that. JNR are ¾ of who I believed could become Oscar’s Golden Circle of most trusted confidantes (the final member being Ruby, of course) and I’m not giving up on that headcanon. 

I figured that’s what the Writers were going for last season with the whole Argus subplot between Jaune and Oscar. But…well, we all know how that went. Nonetheless, maybe there’s hope for this season. I’d love for the PLOT to revisit Oscar’s departure last season and I’d like to think it could come back up for the sake of his development to come from this season. But as always we, will see how that goes.

—————————

SISTER SISTER 

This episode also confirmed what most of us RWBY Theorists has been theorizing for years. Winter is going to be the next candidate for Winter Maiden. 

According to the episode, Ironwood has not only been grooming Winter to become the next Winter Maiden following the passing of the old one but he’s also been grooming the Winter Maiden to choose Winter as her next successor by having Winter be the only person to interact with the old Maiden. 

That’s an interesting take. I mean, my theory has always been thatIronwood wanted to control the succession of the Maidens but I figured he wouldhave done it using Atlas’ experimental aura technology. Not by literallygrooming the old candidate to pick his designated next one. It’s kind a poor way of doing it because as Oz once put it—”Maidens choose themselves”. 

The only time this rule has been broken is when Maidens have been killed and their powers end up going to their assailants as opposed to someone they cared about. This also makes me curious as to what would happened should Ironwood’s plan not work with the Winter Maiden.

I remember Qrow mentioned something about the Maidens back in a previous volume regarding what would happen should a maiden not have someone to choose in mind.

I know Ironwood is trying to make the Granny Winter pick Winter but…what if…this doesn’t happen? 

After all, you can’t just make a person care about someone just because she created a controlled scenario for them to force this type of bond. It doesn’t exactly work that way. While Ironwood might succeed in making Granny Winter care for Winter, I doubt he can make her care about her enough to have the powers pass onto her.

Imagine if…it becomes a case where the Winter Maiden had a daughter or a perhaps a granddaughter or great niece? Perhaps the Winter Maiden never had any children of her own since Maidens are usual chosen young. Perhaps Granny Winter has only known the life of a Maiden and has mostly lived it in isolation. However the only exception was her keeping in contact with the last family member that she had before she became a Maiden. Maybe she had a sister? Or a brother who eventually had a child of their own. A daughter. 

What if…the Winter Maiden has young niece or great niece she never met. And she’s been thinking about that person for some time. Especially now that’s she on her death bed. Perhaps…Granny Winter has one dying wish that she confided in Winter? That she wanted to be reunited with her niece.

Perhaps…she confided this in Winter and she’s been keeping that little secret from even Ironwood this entire time. 

Overall, this whole plot point with Winter and Granny Winter is really intriguing. And what’s more cool about is that it puts Winter more into perspective. This is the first time the show has really focused on Winter as a person; highlighting how she feels. We’ve seen Winter display a softer side to her otherwise stoic demenour but it’s usual reserved for her closest family such as her sister, Weiss.

This is the first time we’ve seen Winter show genuine care for anyone outside of her family. I wish we had gotten more time to spend with Winter and Granny Winter. It was nice to see how Winter has accepted her fate. It was also good to see just how much Winter values General Ironwood. It wouldn’t surprise me if part of the reason Winter respects the General is because she sees him as a father figure—at least a better one than her own father. I just really enjoyed that moment between Weiss and Winter. It’s very rare we see the Schnee Sisters interact so it was lovely seeing them have their moment this episode.

I know I call the Winter Maiden Granny Winter, but in actuality, her name is Fria. And one thing I’m curious about is whether or Fria will be based on the Norse Goddess of the same name?

Is Fria related to Nora?

This isn’t really a point of the episode but a theory I have based on what I learnt of the Winter Maiden. To me, the name “Fria” reminds me of “Freya”

According to research, Freya, in Norse mythology, is the Goddess of love but she is also associated with sex, lust, beauty, sorcery, fertility, gold, war and death.It is also stated that Freya shares a connection to Thor. Since Nora is RWBY’s equivalent of Thor and since it’s been teased that us fans will be learning more about Nora’s backstory soon, I’m starting to wonder if there will be an unspoken connection to Nora and Fria---the Winter Maiden.

Technically, the Maidens are the closest thing to goddesses in Remnant given their strong potency in magic. So I’m curious if at some point it will be revealed that Nora is a long-lost relative of Fria---probably her only living family member---who was stolen from her as a child by bandits who then trafficked Nora off to Mistral where she ultimately escaped her captives and wound up in Kunoyuri where she met Ren.

Imagine if...it’s a case where...Nora hasn’t seen Fria in years. Nor does she even remember her since Nora was abducted as a child so all the trauma of being kidnapped from her family forced Nora to somehow repress her past. Perhaps V7 will end on a cliffhanger note with Fria revealing to Winter her last dying wish---

To be somehow be reunited with her beloved granddaughter before she parted Remnant and returned to the Gods. And her granddaughter’s name was Nora Valkyrie.

Imagine if...V7 ends on Nora just learning that she is the granddaughter of the Winter Maiden who desperately wants to see her before she goes. But Nora becomes torn up about it since hearing about Fria causes all the repressed memories of her past to suddenly resurface after so long and for the first time since she first met Ren, Nora becomes a emotionally vulnerable and scared girl again--- unable to cope with this startling revelation and this time, it will Ren’s turn to support Nora on the qualms of her past along with Jaune (and possibly Oscar to since he is connected to the Maidens being the successor to the man who created them). I’m not sure if this will be the case in the serious. 

However I am definitely down for this theory becoming canon if possible.

Nora becoming the Winter Maiden would surprisingly fit given the fact that her fairytale counterpart is an mythological god. Nora will literally become Thor if she rises to Maiden status and thunder is her element of choice.

Just picture Nora like Thor in Thor: Ragnarok. Her crystal blue-green eyes aglow with electricity surging around her body. And Nora using thunder as her element of choice as a Maiden even though she’s supposedly the Winter Maiden still fits since, technically---Cinder is the Fall Maiden and her element of choice is Fire.

Raven is the Spring Maiden and her element of choice was surprisingly Ice of all things. So Nora as the Winter Maiden using thunder. That would be purely badass!

The only gripe that I have with this theory is that Nora rising to Maiden status would put a greater death flag target on her back than her red hair. Theorists are already saying that Nora might be killed by Tyrian since in mythology, Thor was killed by a scorpion. 

I personally don’t want Nora to die at all! I like and care too much about Nora as character. Raven is a Maiden and she lived. So if Nora becomes a Maiden, I expect her to live too. I’d actually be livid if Nora ends up dying especially since she’s been with us since V1. Pyrhha’s death was one thing but Nora’s...I’ll be really pissed if she gets killed off. ESPECIALLY in the event of JNPR being revived through Oscar.

So yeah, while I really want Nora to become the Winter Maiden, I don’t want her to die either. But regardless, for now I’m going to stick a pin in this theory and keep it on the table of possibilities.

----

Robynn Death Flags + Ace Frames

And that’s pretty much it. That’s all I have to say on CH5, Mizu. As an honourary mention, I did like seeing Robyn Hill. She was cool and I’m intrigued by her and her Happy Huntresses. I’m especially curious about her possible connection to Clover because they seemed to have history. Definitely giving me Robin Hood and the Sheriff of Nottingham vibes. But beyond that, there wasn’t much for me to say on the part with Robyn. However I am looking forward to seeing her and her huntresses in action soon.

The title of the next episode---CH6 is titled “Night Out” and our heroes are expected to be attending the Watch party for the election campaign between Jacques and Robyn. 

I have a hunch that CH6 is going to be another “calm before the storm” type of episode just like CH4. 

I have a feeling that Tyrian is going to probably show up during the rally targeting Robyn to kill her. 

Since Tyrian is working with Watts and since Watts was shown eyeballing the Ace Ops in the opening, my theory is that Watts is going to have Tyrian either kill off Robyn or at least target her and make it look as if Clover of the Ace Ops was responsible for the hit on Robyn at the rally.

Thus making the public of Mantle believe that the Ace Ops were the ones behind all the murders of the spokespeople in Mantle like Forest. #FRWBY

I think it’s going to start with Clover first since he’s the leader of the Aces and we’ve seen more of him than his teammates. 

I have a feeling that Watts plan is to use either Clover and/or the Ace Ops as martyrs to further tarnish the General’s public image through a huge scandal with Robyn. 

I think Robyn is either going to die or be believed to have been killed with Clover blamed for her death. 

An Ace Op---one of the General’s personal attack dogs--- accused of killing the key representative for Mantle to keep her from gaining a seat on the governing council---hence keeping Mantle out of Atlas? That’s a good scandal. One that could destroy James even further. 

I still stand by my theory that Jacques plan is to usurp James and through Watts’ aid, I think there’s a huge possibility.

Unless Jacques is nothing but a perfect pawn to Watts for him to pin everything on in the end just to cover his tracks and cause an even worse scandal for Atlas with Mantle.

I dunno. These are all just theories but I’m gonna stick with them for now. In the meantime, I hope this answers your Mizu.

~LittleMissSquiggles (2019)

#mizuike #squiggles answers: rwby #oscar pine #nora valkyrie #jaune arc #lie ren #rwby theories #rwby volume 7 theories #rwby volume 7 spoilers

[skywalkersapprentice]

mdzs novel review

Now that we’re in quarantine and I have an infinite amount of time on my hands, why not read a novel that’s 500k, right?

(Spoilers ahead.)

I totally fucked up my sleeping schedule by staying up for three nights in a row and sleeping four hours in the afternoon while reading it. worth it, though. Despite a few flaws that tripped me up close to the end, Mo Dao Zu Shi (The Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation) was a gorgeous story. Kudos to the translators for giving it to us in English.

I’ll start off by saying that this story is not for the faint of heart. The main character has very grey morals. There is self-cannibalism, gore, period-typical homophobia, corpses come to life, mentions of rape, incest, sexual content, straight up dubcon and disturbing themes all the way through. If I’d seen this tagged as such on Ao3, I definitely would have left it alone. Despite all this, there’s also some truly wonderful characters, a plot unlike anything I’ve ever read before, subtle pining, fantastic worldbuilding, magical music, found families, and!! canonly lgbt characters that get to experience all of this things in the one hundred goddamn chapters it takes for them to get together.

The Good:

Wei Wuxian. One of the most interesting characters I’ve ever encountered. How can one be so good, so happy, so giving, yet so incredibly fucking annoying? He’s so clever, but also a moron. He’s selfless, but only in regards to things and people he cares about. He has an absolutely terrible memory (god me too) and knows how to get under everyone’s skin and has killed literal thousands of people and also. He is my son. If I knew him in real life I think he wouldn’t have survived long enough to become the Yiling Patriarch but in fiction he is wonderful.

The plot: Look. This novel is longer than the first four Harry Potter books combined. You can almost think of it as two books- one set in the past, one set sixteen years later. But although it’s the longest book I’ve ever read, it never really felt boring. It was definitely confusing at times (I’ve never had to take notes on a novel before to keep everything straight in my head) but I wasn’t bored. Things just keep happening- Wei Wuxian is back from the dead!! Now there’s a creepy hand!! Now there’s a statue that can move!! Now we’re in the past!! Now we’re back in the present and there’s a castle that eats people!! Now we’re in a ghost city and there’s some freaky stuff going down!! Time for the saddest flashback of all time, and now we’re starting to put the puzzle of this dismembered person together!! All of this is interspersed with worldbuilding and character dynamics and creating a full picture of the past and- whew. It was so hard to tear myself away to sleep or eat because I just wanted to know- what’s going to happen next? 

The love story: Hello, slowest of burns in the entire fucking world. I live for the enemies-to-friends-to-enemies-to-friends-to-what-are-we-to-lovers love story that this book gave me. Lan Wangji, you poor emotionally repressed disaster gay. Wei Wuxian, you blind oblivious moronic disaster bi. Somehow, they’re perfect for each other. I was really, really hesitant to read this book because I know it has roots in that specific straight-girl-writes-gay-men type of culture that is often terrible and fetishistic. There were definitely things that I disagreed with that that I’ll talk about later, but largely, stereotypes were avoided and I have to give the author credit for this relationship that managed to be so many things. I relate heavily to the type of person Lan Wangji is, and I adored watching him fall for Wei Wuxian, through Wei Wuxian’s eyes, without either of them really even realizing it. They’re the definition of what I like to call a “Red and Blue couple”- the opposites, the fire and ice, the calm and the wild, the dark and the light, the red and the blue, who complement one another so well despite being so different. They balanced each other out wonderfully. Don’t talk to me about the WangXian song or the fact that they have a child or I will start crying.

Lan Wangji: Though I love Wei Wuxian, annoying traits and all, Lan Wangji is who I heavily resonated with. He kind of reminds me of Else from Frozen?? Anyone else?? Like, his whole thing is basically “conceal don’t feel”, except what he’s concealing is the fact that he feels things so deeply. He just wants to help people, to be essentially perfect at what he does (scooby doo villian voice: and he would have gotten away with it too if it weren’t for wei wuxian) His character development from the past to present was lovely. I silently cheered for him whenever he broke the rules, or let the strict facade down for a bit. 

The side characters: Literally how are there so many characters in this book who are so fleshed out that they feel like real people? Xiao XingChen, Lan SiZhui, Wen Ning, Jin Ling, Jiang Cheng and Jiang LanYi all especially stood out to me, but even beyond them, everyone had a fully explained reason and motivation for like, everything they did. Even if I hated the villains, they weren’t needlessly evil. We love a grey story.

But there were some things I didn’t like.

The Bad

The R rated stuff: Well. This is probably the weirdest critique I’ve ever had to make about a book, and maybe some of it was partly due to translation, but... the sex was out of character. I thought the general dynamic made no sense for the two of them as people and it just.... wasn’t super well written? Thankfully I was warned beforehand that the Incense Burner chapters contained content I wasn’t prepared to read, but yikes, I felt like I was reading about two different characters the second clothes started coming off. I haven’t finished the bonus chapters for this reason. The second I read the word “rape”, I had to stop. Consent is a pretty hard line for me, and I can’t do a dubcon kink. Obviously the author can do whatever the hell she wants with her characters, but I felt like she threw away their personalities for the sake of trying to write something hot (which- it wasn’t.) This is why straight people have no rights and also why I will be pretending those scenes don’t exist. 

The Hatred Chapters: I do feel like all of the tension and action was sort of- let down at what was supposed to be the climactic showdown in the temple. It dragged on for so many chapters that I didn’t feel on the edge of my seat waiting to see what would happen next.That could also be due to translation. I’m not sure. Maybe I need to read the Hatred chapters again. But I did feel sort of let down in the final 20 chapters of this novel. It wasn’t enough to seriously impact how much I love the general concept, but it was disappointing.

Semi related but after 100 chapter build up, that confession could have been better. Again- maybe a translation thing.

The Nie MingJue backstory flashback: just- honestly wasn’t interesting to me. It was the only part of the novel that I really had to slog through. 

Lastly - this isn’t the novel’s fault, and I am certainly grateful to the translators for all of their work translating this gigantic novel, but there were some consistent grammatical issues surrounding the dialogue tags that bugged me. I’m not sure how it is in Chinese, but in English, writing “Wei WuXian, “Nothing.””  just- isn’t correct. At the very least, you need a verb like “said”. I usually read fast enough that my brain tends to insert the word even if it’s not there, but when reading slowly, this did frequently jar me out of the story. I’d be willing to edit the entire novel just to fix these errors. But it says a lot about how good this novel is that I continued reading despite errors like this because something like that in a fic would have me closing the tab immediately.

Alright, that’s all. 

Overall:

There are so many small things, little moments and lines that I loved about this story, it would take me days to list them all. The dialogue patterns from character to character were distinct. Things like the forehead ribbon were endlessly entertaining. Side plots like the A-Qing one had me in tears and I was laughing a few chapters late from drunk LWJ. The novel was just fun to read. There were errors, yes, there were disappointments, sure. But it made me feel so much. I’ve been through the entire range of human emotion while reading it, and it’s so rare to find a book that just yanks you into the universe like this one did to me. I really needed an escape this week, and this was absolutely a welcome one. If I go read it again, I’m sure I’ll find a hundred more things I like about it. Heed the warnings I’ve given, if you read it, but I absolutely adored most of this book and I’ll be thinking about it for a long time.

9/10.

#mdzs #mdzs novel #Right okay time to finish the donghua

[ginnyzero]

Writing Romantic Chemistry: Pt 1

Recently, Becca who actually went to school for this stuff, wrote a good post about romance novels and how they’re different than other novels. For the full gist, go ahead and read it for yourself. What I took away from it is that in romance novels, unlike most other novels, the main conflict is between the two main characters. There is something keeping them apart, poor communication, denial, secrets, or lies. At the same time, there has to be something pulling them together both personally and socially. An outside force is attracting these two people who normally wouldn’t be together into each others orbit where they have to overcome their difficulties and ‘give in’ to that personal attraction.

Romance is pretty popular as a genre and as a subgenre in books and shows and movies and some are better at it than others. (Most action movies are pretty bad at it.) There are procedural shows like Castle that were built around the entire idea that someday the two main leads would get together and have a happily something or something. There are procedural shows like Bones where they tried to push it, forgot about it and then fell back into it when they were running short on plot ideas for the main characters. Then there are procedural shows like Rizzoli and Isles where the love lives of the main two women are cliff notes in the overall friendship.

I’ve read a lot of urban fantasy where romance is a major subplot and I’ve mentioned some of the tropes I’ve seen in previous blog posts. Tropes like serial dating and love triangles and the type of drama that if two people actually had a conversation like grown adults everything bad could have been avoided. Or peril could have been avoided if the main characters were actually doing their jobs instead of trying to solve crime. A lot of the time, these romances don't feel successful.

And in order for a romance to feel successful the characters in question need to have and keep or maintain that ‘spark’ or what we generally call chemistry. And let’s face it, there are a lot of characters out there that don’t have a lot of chemistry with each other and we’re supposed to go on faith that they’re good for each other. (I’m looking at you Letty and Dom.) And as writers we have to know where that spark is at its brightest point and if the characters don’t move to the next level then that spark is going to flicker and die. (cough, Castle and Beckett.)

The first thing I’ve discovered about creating chemistry is that you need to get the audience invested. In order to care about your couple, your readers or watchers need to care about them as people. There are a lot of books that I can’t get invested in the main characters because the book is so focused on the plot, the mystery, the not so great adventure, that the writer has either not written about the character in the first place or has been encouraged by an editor to cut all of it out in the interest of word count. (Most highly recommended urban fantasy.) Leaving the characters to the reader to feel like card board cut outs that I just can’t get invested in. In order to care about the character, I need to know about the character.

Problems with his female characters aside, Jim Butcher is actually fairly good at this. In the first book about Dresden I learned that he likes to open doors for women, he enjoys steak sandwiches and warm beer, his alarm clock has Mickey Mouse on it (because no one with a heart can hit Mickey Mouse), he is owned by a big cat and his place is a hodge podge of textures, old paperbacks and yeah, he’s a magic geek. It may not seem like a lot, but that is the type of information and the way it is presented that lets me get to know and get invested in the idea the Harry Dresden is not that bad of a guy and I could like him.

A lot of books that have romance as a subplot especially if they are going the serial dater or the love triangle route, only take the time to flesh out the main character. Sometimes they don’t even do that. If the writer doesn’t flesh out the main character or the other side of the love plot, then why do I care? (I don’t.)

After you flesh out the characters and get the readers invested in their lives, then you can get the characters invested in each other. Sure, they’ve got outside forces working on them to get them into the same orbit. But once these outside forces are removed, what do the characters see in each other that will make them stick together. Yeah, people feel intense emotions under stress. They often feel attraction and investment in the other person just because of those high stress situations. But what about after that?

A good example I feel of this is Kent and Jane from Rizzoli and Isles. Sure, the show got canceled before they really did anything with Kent and Jane and in the last few episodes they threw an entirely out of left field FBI guy for Jane to 'feel attracted to.' (Note: This is bad. We didn't know this guy. We didn't care. It felt pushed and rushed because it was.) But Kent and Jane had chemistry. They had sparks. And the way it started is that first, given that Kent was such a late comer into the series, they let the watchers get to know Kent a bit first. As we already knew and are invested in Jane and her happiness. He's an odd ball, but professional, limited social skills with a sense of humor. They 'revealed' that Kent had a bit of a crush on Jane after some distraction hi-jinks with Maura (moral and ethical quandary there as a conflict) and started having Jane and Kent bounce sarcasm and jokes off each other. Jane tended to ignore him but his puppy dog eyes were adorable. The question was would Jane ever notice Kent as more than a colleague? (I think they were going for yes... I mean come on, the whole bit with the watermelons in that one case. "But Kent, what did the watermelons do to you?" And the kilt!)

And then the series got cancelled. And we lost this great romantic conflict which drives me crazy. (And I didn't like Kent at first. I swear. I despised the way they introduced him. Ugh and then he grew on me and yes, see, that is good writing and I fell for it!)

There are different types of attraction. There is physical attraction, usually the first thing a person notices about the other. There is mental attraction, appreciation of their brains and the way they think. There’s verbal attraction, a liking of the way they talk, how they talk and what they talk about.  There’s emotional attraction. They like the way that person feels things. What makes these characters compatible that there is chemistry between them?

And what is keeping them apart? Things like other relationships, getting out of bad relationships, not being ready for a relationship, trust issues, moral quandaries (such as not being a person who does casual sex,) and the ever easy, DENIAL. Maybe there is a power imbalance or an age gap or job restrictions (can't date within the office or superior officers.)

Then as a writer, we have to fine tune the sense of ‘now is the time.’ A romance plot follows the same rules as every other plot. At the highest point of the conflict, the character has to act or the relationship will wither and die. And if the characters don’t act, the opportunity is missed, the readers are disappointed and they start looking for the next two big relationships for those characters to get invested into. If those aren’t presented in a convincing manner, then they might just stop caring about these characters all together.

It can be easy to try and drag a relationship out with them almost getting together and then last minute something interfering. All of this is for the sake of drama or trying to up the ante or push it off or make the tension that much greater. And a lot of times, this fails dramatically. (See Castle and Beckett.) The writers may still try to push the characters together even though they missed that natural point in the conflict where it was the right moment, the right time story wise to do so. And then, they have to find a new conflict to keep the series going.

Because, once that conflict is resolved a lot of writers and writing rooms don’t know what to do next. They have to manufacture another conflict in the place of the ‘will they, won’t they.’ A lot of times it ends up being on the woman’s side of “am I really good enough for him?” (Men in fiction never are as insecure as they are in real life. It’s not “macho” enough.) Even if that woman has been extremely self-confident before then and pushing the guy away because she doesn’t think he’s good enough for her. There are a lot of other conflicts than that, money and child rearing and living arrangements and 'how do we tell our friends, do we tell our friends?' come to mind. (But maybe they are just too boring.)

There was a lot of outrage in the fandom of BBC Sherlock when Watson got married and had a baby with Mary. “How is Watson going to go on adventures with Sherlock with a baby?!” Well, you do what normal and rational people do, you hire a sitter? You take the baby with you? (Doyle wasn’t good with female characters to begin with, BBC’s interpretation didn’t help matters.) But these are the adult problems. How do you juggle a job and a family and hobbies and friends and keep your romance alive? Everyone has to do it. But media just tries to ignore it because UST is so much more entertaining. (Supposedly.) Babies have a bad habit of ending up kidnapped or disappearing for the story entirely (Bones.) Women who may be rivals for the main character’s romantic affections are killed.

Or there ends up having to be a conflict in the marriage that may mirror how they got together. Bad communication. Denial of self or the opposite, selfishness. The characters may get involved in a new danger. Maybe there is an affair and trust is lost and has to be regained. Hardships  like disease and accidents are all tests of character that really show what people are like on the inside.

There is a reason why most romance series focus on a bunch of couples one right after the other who were introduced in previous books rather than focusing on a single couple. Every time a reader gets a new book there is a new thrill of ‘will they or won’t they?’ And the possibility of a different couple conflict. (Of course most romance novels are happily ever after or happy for now, so it’s more of a how than a real question.)

So, romance is tricky to write because it so depends on the fleshed out personalities of the characters. And how the reader feels about the characters is really going to depend on their own biases and views of romance too. From my observations of fandom is that somewhere out there in the great wide internet, there are going to be people who are going to put the oddest people into relationships and can get behind almost anything. And it may not at all be what the creators intended. But the people who consume the media see chemistry or a spark and decide to view it as romantic rather than filial love.

Just goes to show you can't predict anything!

#writblr #wrtblr #writing advice #writing tips #romance #writing romance #romance writing

[hufflly-puffs]

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince

Chapter 13: The Secret Riddle

Something that I noticed during this chapter is that Dumbledore, after he had shown Harry another memory, interprets the scene for him. Therefore Rowling interprets the scene through the character of Dumbledore for her audience. This isn’t the first time. Especially Hermione (but also Dumbledore) functions often as an Exposition character, someone who gives Harry vital information about the Wizarding World, as well as interpreting certain situations for Harry, for example Cho’s emotional state on their horrible first date. In this case Dumbledore (therefore Rowling) wanted to make sure Harry (therefore the audience) pays attention to the right details when it comes to Voldemort. I’m usually not a huge fan of a writer trying to explain their story to me, but in this case it makes sense within the story.

“She appears to have brushed the necklace with the smallest possible amount of skin: there was a tiny hole in her glove. Had she put it on, had she even held it in her ungloved hand, she would have died, perhaps instantly.” – I wonder what kind of curse Katie almost fell victim to. Touching the necklace would have killed her immediately, but in her case even the smallest amount of skin caused severe damage. How exactly would the curse have killed her? What is it that happened to her?

“‘He only gave her ten Galleons?’ said Harry indignantly.” – Well, she could have bought a Hogwarts textbook from it. And maybe like one butterbeer.

“‘Ah,’ said Dumbledore, ‘perhaps she could. But it is my belief – I am guessing again, but I am sure I am right – that when her husband abandoned her, Merope stopped using magic. I do not think that she wanted to be a witch any longer. Of course, it is also possible that her unrequited love and the attendant despair sapped her of her powers; […].’” – I think for Merope magic has never been a good thing. Her father and her brother used magic against her, to oppress her, to the point where she was emotionally unstable enough not to perform any magic herself. She then eventually used magic to get Tom Riddle to fall in love with her, but the moment she stopped he left her, perhaps making her believe it was her being a witch that made him go. Being a witch has never been a positive experience for her, so the great irony is that the descendant of Salazar Slytherin, the mother of Lord Voldemort, no longer wanted to be a witch.

“‘Could you possibly be feeling sorry for Lord Voldemort?’ ‘No,’ said Harry quickly, ‘but she had a choice, didn’t she, not like my mother –’ ‘Your mother had a choice, too,’ said Dumbledore gently. ‘Yes, Merope Riddle chose death in spite of a son who needed her, but do not judge her too harshly, Harry.’” – Lily died for her son, died to protect him, chose death to save him. Merope chose death despite her son needing her; it would have been brave for her to choose life instead. Both Harry and Voldemort grew up as orphans, but the reasons why they had no parents taking care for them couldn’t have been more different. The one whose parents died for love became a good man, the one whose parents abandoned him became a monster.

“‘You mean he’s won a scholarship? How can he have done? He’s never been entered for one.’ ‘Well, his name has been down for our school since birth –’ ‘Who registered him? His parents?’ There was no doubt that Mrs Cole was an inconveniently sharp woman.” – Look, Mrs Cole might think that Tom is a bit strange and she is relieved that he will leave her orphanage, but still when a complete stranger appears to take away one of her children she asks the right questions.

“‘Here,’ said Dumbledore, waving his wand once as he passed her the piece of paper, ‘I think this will make everything clear.’ Mrs Cole’s eyes slid out of focus and back again as she gazed intently at the blank paper for a moment. ‘That seems perfectly in order,’ she said placidly, handing it back.” – Obviously this is the same magic paper the Doctor uses. #confirmed

“‘Well, we named him just as she’d said, it seemed so important to the poor girl, but no Tom nor Marvolo nor any kind of Riddle ever came looking for him, nor any family at all, so he stayed in the orphanage and he’s been here ever since.’” – We later find out that little Tom Riddle isn’t very fond of his name, and that is even before he found out that his father was a Muggle. The name ‘Tom’ is too common, not special, not the way Tom sees himself (he doesn’t even like that he shares his names with others). But it is so interesting that this is the name Merope chose for her son – the name of his Muggle dad. Merope, who no longer used magic, who no longer wanted to be a witch, gave her son a name that would leave no trace of his heritage. The only indicator to his Wizard ancestors is his middle name, Marvolo, so despite his abuse it is possible Merope still loved her father. Perhaps she had also given her son a Muggle name so that neither her father or her brother would find her son.

It is clear from what Mrs Cole tells Dumbledore about Tom that he is a psychopath. He doesn’t have any friends, he lies, he manipulates, he scares the other children. And there isn’t a defining incident that changed his personality, he has always been like this. Rowling avoids the stereotype to portray the orphanage as a horrible place – Harry mentions that the children look well-cared. From what we learn about Mrs Cole she has a genuine interest in the well-being of her children (and a little drinking problem). Her interest in getting rid of Riddle is more for the sake of the other children, who are afraid of him. There is no indication that Mrs Cole or anyone else at the orphanage has acted abusive, so in many ways Tom had a better childhood than Harry or Snape. The fact that Tom was a product of rape, that both his parents abandoned him, can be seen as a metaphor, that the loveless circumstances of his birth created a man who was never able to understand love himself. But little Tom Riddle doesn’t know this yet. It is no excuse for the frightening behaviour he already shows. And perhaps that is why he could never redeem himself in the end, because he has always been a monster.

“‘I can make things move without touching them. I can make animals do what I want them to do, without training them. I can make bad things happen to people who annoy me. I can make them hurt if I want to.’” – You remember the kind of accidental magic Harry produced as a child? Like making his hair grow back or magically escaping his bullies at school? None of those have the quality of “I can make them hurt if I want to”. Like if a child ever says something like that to you, congratulation, you found yourself in a horror movie. And he shows not a single bit of remorse about it. He is just fascinated by the kind of power he has over other people.

“‘I knew I was different,’ he whispered to his own quivering fingers. ‘I knew I was special. Always, I knew there was something.’” – And as Harry later remarks Tom’s reaction is quite different to his. He immediately believed Dumbledore when he learned that he was a wizard, because he already thought of himself to be special. To be different. Extraordinary. And even now, when he doesn’t know about Purebloods and the like, little Tom already has this mind-set that he is better, above all others, Muggles and Wizards alike.

“‘I haven’t got any money.’ ‘That is easily remedied,’ said Dumbledore, drawing a leather money-pouch from his pocket. ‘There is a fund at Hogwarts for those who require assistance to buy books and robes.” – How come the Weasleys never got any money from that fund? At least it is never mentioned. Does this fund only work for special cases like Riddle, who has no money of his own? Does it also apply to families with a low-income? Did the Weasleys simply refuse, too proud to take any money? Or does this fund no longer exist? (Though I doubt that Dumbledore as a headmaster would get rid of it)

“‘Was my father a wizard? He was called Tom Riddle too, they’ve told me.’ ‘I’m afraid I don’t know,’ said Dumbledore, his voice gentle. ‘My mother can’t have been magic, or she wouldn’t have died,’ said Riddle, more to himself than Dumbledore. ‘It must’ve been him.” – Already Tom associates Muggles with weakness and magic with power. He doesn’t believe his mother could have been a witch or else she wouldn’t have died. At some point he found out the truth however – that his father was a Muggle, that his mother was a witch, descendant from Slytherin, who still died after all, refusing to use magic to save her own life. Maybe that is where Voldemort’s fascination with immortality comes from – the belief that magic equals power, that used in the right way you can even avoid death, failing to see, as Dumbledore told him, that there are worse things than death.

“‘Did I know that I had just met the most dangerous Dark wizard of all time?’ said Dumbledore. ‘No, I had no idea that he was to grow up to be what he is. However, I was certainly intrigued by him. I returned to Hogwarts intending to keep an eye upon him, something I should have done in any case, given that he was alone and friendless, but which, already, I felt I ought to do for others’ sake as much as his.” – Even then Dumbledore saw that Tom was a psychopath, someone who could appear charming on the surface, but with no empathy for others, who already used magic as a weapon. I think that over the years Riddle perfected his mask of the incredible gifted young charming man, to avoid to draw any attention to his true nature. Dumbledore had seen glimpses of that true nature upon their first meeting, which is why he never trusted Tom completely.

“You will hear many of his Death Eaters claiming that they are in his confidence, that they alone are close to him, even understand him. They are deluded. Lord Voldemort has never had a friend, nor do I believe that he has ever wanted one.” – This perfectly corresponds with the second chapter, with Bellatrix’s firm belief that she is the closet to the Dark Lord and her anger when she learned that Voldemort confided in Snape as well. It is a part of Voldemort’s manipulative scheme, to let his followers believe they alone are his secret keepers, so therefore none of them will bond too much with the others. They all follow him, but as a group there are not united. Every single one of them is only interested what is best for them, not the collective.

“‘And lastly – I hope you are not too sleepy to pay attention to this, Harry – the young Tom Riddle liked to collect trophies. You saw the box of stolen articles he had hidden in his room. These were taken from victims of his bullying behaviour, souvenirs, if you will, of particularly unpleasant bits of magic. Bear in mind this magpie-like tendency, for this, particularly, will be important later.” – Obviously this will later make sense in reference to the Horcruxes, and the value Voldemort puts in certain artefacts, especially those that contain a certain history. But these little souvenirs he has here remind me of a psychopath who keeps souvenirs from his murders. And that is what his first Horcrux is after all – the diary only has personal value, as it is an evidence for the first murder Voldemort ever committed.

#Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince #The Secret Riddle #chapter notes #hbp

[dmcrossroads-blog]

War of the Spark, a novel review

As a child, I aspired to become an author. There was something alluring about crafting characters and entwining their lives together through circumstances. It is also one of the reasons I was an avid reader as a child. I still remember the release of the fifth Harry Potter novel and a friend loaned me their copy. I returned it to them the next day at school and they were confused as to why I didn’t want to finish it. But I had! The fifth book came in at 766 pages, for context.

The entire point to going over these little details it to outline how much I truly enjoy a story. Combine that with the fact that, as many will guess, I am obsessed with Magic: the Gathering and you would imagine that the War of the Spark novel was a dream-come-true for me. It has been ages since the last Magic novel, and this was the finale of a decade-long spiderweb of stories and there was much speculation and tension riding on this book. I had high hopes for it, especially as the cards were previewed ahead of its release. And, I’m sad to announce, I was ultimately disappointed. 

There is a lot to unpack here. There was always going to be a laundry list of challenges for anyone who wrote this story, so I want to put this out as a disclaimer: my comments here are not direct criticism toward Greg Weisman and some of these comments aren’t even directly critical of Wizards of the Coast themselves. Some of it happens to just be a collection of unfortunate circumstances. So, let’s dive into this.

Before we get too deep into the review of the story, I do want to make sure to give a SPOILER WARNING. Some of this will reveal plot points or character points of the novel. If you don’t want to know these things before reading it and coming to your own conclusions, please bookmark the page and come back after you’ve read the novel.

The Kiddie Character Pool

When I say “kiddie character pool”, I’m not referring that the characters are children, or even that the writing is geared toward children. Rather, I’m referencing the lack of depth in the characters that were presented. Vraska and Jace specifically did not live up to the deeper characters we had become accustomed to after their foray and frolicking in Ixalan. Jace lost some of his self-confidence and regained much of his brooding nature. Vraska’s confidence and determination to aid her friends and end the threat of Bolas seems to have flown the coop in favor of something of a self-pity party.

While these are the top two examples of lack of character depth, there are a few throughout the story as well. Domri Rade seems to exist solely to illustrate a person fed up with the status quo of Ravnica and what happens to those who are loyal to Bolas when he’s done with them. Aside from that, he offers little to the plot. The character Rat basically exists to reveal information to newer players or readers who are unfamiliar to Ravnica and some of the other Planeswalkers, going so far to even embody this “newness” in Teyo, one of the main perspectives and a newly ignited Planeswalker. While the plan does the job to inform the reader, it does come across as a cheap, almost “cheating” trope.

We got Quantity, not Quality

This also comes into play with another big criticism. When it comes to the supporting cast, we were buried under name after name after name, but given very little else. Characters like Kiora, Tamiyo and others were named and even briefly seen in the story but had virtually no lines. Even characters like Nissa had very little important “screen time” throughout the novel, despite having quite a bit of exposition available to them.  

This problem even extended down past the Planeswalkers of the story, but to a greater degree. Characters that lined up with the Planeswalkers’ interest, like Aurelia and Tomik and even Emmara Tandris and Trostani were able to get some dialogue throughout the story, but there was a gaping hole where so many important Ravnica-native characters were left out. Normally, this is easily excusable for the sake of the story, but when you remember that the entire set of cards was previewed just before the release of the novel, this created and awkward mix of expectations versus what we received. People were excited to see long-beloved characters like Fblthp and Feather finally receive cards, along with the Vorthos phantom Massacre Girl. Then characters like Krenko were never mentioned and even exciting new character Roaleks was briefly mentioned, but then never seen or heard. By the end of the novel, I very much felt like this was the second book in a series and I had missed the first book. There can be a point made that the cards do not always have to be drawn into the story, but given that the cards were not only previewed in story order but also even highlighted by what “Act” they appeared in, it feels very strange to see these Acts feel like they’re missing parts.

The Endgame

My final main criticism of the novel was the endgame of the plot. The whole idea is that Nicol Bolas is attempting to gain godhood by drawing Planeswalkers to Ravnica with the beacon that Ral Zarek was manipulated into making to try to assemble Magic’s version of the Avengers, then trap them on the plane with the Immortal Sun that Tezzeret and Vraska stole from Azor on Ixalan. Finally, the Dreadhorde of Amonkhet lazotep-covered zombies were the mindless drones, led by Liliana, to draw out the sparks of Planeswalkers to send them back to Nicol Bolas as a godhood battery. In terms of evil plots, it is not terrible and the lamenting of the characters like Ral Zarek did a decent job at setting Nicol Bolas up as the omnipotent thinker who was always one step ahead. But in the end, it seemed as though the bad guy went down with… Well, very little fight.

The simple moral of the story was that Bolas’ own hubris cost him his own victory. Imbuing Hazoret’s weapon with his own essence, treating Liliana like a soulless drone and overall underestimating how dangerous an army of Planeswalkers could be were the big points that get made in the last chapter by Ugin. Which begs the question: for a creature that thinks so far ahead to make his enemies think they’re stopping him but really are just playing into his plans, these seem like relatively obvious things to overlook. The conclusion feels less like the heroes banded together to thwart a God-powered Elder Dragon and pre-Mending Planeswalker and more like Bolas was a childish whelp with a touch of power that finally got what was coming to him. It came across very unsatisfying, given that this was supposed to be the conclusion of a decade-long set of stories all coming together and the ending of this phase of the story and the last of Bolas’ arc(s).

In Conclusion

Sadly, I think this was poor expectation management combined with some other limitations… Time, page count, etc. can all be attributing factors that may be outside of many people’s control. For what it is worth, the novel did the job of showing us how the arc has ended, and the plot points do follow what we expected from the preview season of the card set. The only unfortunate conclusion I can come to is that the novel is almost like a SparkNotes version of what we wanted. If War of the Spark had been a trilogy, I think we could have gotten something much more epic-feeling and satisfying. Overall, despite understanding those other factors and the limitations, I wouldn’t rate the novel above a 4/10, though I think it falls as a 3 in my personal preferences. Too many of the characters I was excited to see were not even mentioned and again; Expectation management dictated that they would at least have a line in the story, even if it was just a third-party mention of what they were doing during the conflict.

If this is the beginning of Magic: the Gathering novels coming back as a regular occurrence, I believe Wizards needs to look at their previous attempts and learn from what made (some) of those stories great. They need to look at what we, the fans, are saying about War of the Spark and learn from what we’re telling them we didn’t enjoy about the experience. There may not be a perfect answer where everyone is happy and the company has the team, funding and people to provide it to us, but I have to believe there is a way to obtain a better experience and a higher success rate than what we got in this instance.

Here’s to hoping for a better future, Wizards. Thanks for reading.

#magic the gathering #magicthegathering #war of the spark #MTGWAR MagicTheGathering #MTGWAR WAR WarOfTheSpark MagicTheGathering #novel review #review

[h-styles-babes]

What About Us? | Part IV

Read Part III here.

FOUR

The rest of April passed without much fanfare. The pictures that got released of Harry and Val were still making the rounds on social media, but because they hadn’t been pictures together again since, the hype had died down. Val could easily enough avoid any nasty messages on social media because they were much fewer and farther between, which was nice, she supposed. 

Harry didn’t really officially make it back to London until early May due to his promo schedule. After being in America for a little over a week, he came back to London to make an appearance on the Graham Norton Show, and then it was straight to France to appear on Quotidien (where Val begrudgingly admitted to Nick that Harry looked very good, and her body betrayed her in its reaction to him. She couldn’t help it. The hormones made her horny. Or, that’s what she told herself, at least.)

As he’d promised, he was back in London in time for their next appointment. They went on a Sunday morning, when the office would usually be closed. However, due to Harry’s traveling schedule, the doctor had made an exception for them, which Val had thanked him for profusely. Much as the last time, they went in through the employee entrance, and they were greeted by Sara, who was smiley and seemed to be genuinely happy to see them again. 

“Glad yeh both could make it,” she said as she ushered them into the nurse’s station where she instructed Val to step on the scale. 

About a week and a half prior, Val’s tummy had popped out seemingly overnight. She now had a pretty sizable bump, and you could definitely tell that she was pregnant. Her roommates had gushed over it, extremely excited that she now looked like a proper pregnant woman. They’d squealed over the possibilities of the gender, mostly just excited to be able to start buying cute little outfits and toys once they found out the sex. Her parents, who Val had been out to dinner with the previous Saturday, had beamed when they’d seen her new belly. Her mum told her she looked like a glowing mum-to-be, and Val couldn’t hold back the smile she’d given her own mother. 

She was finally getting to the point where she was excited about having a baby. The first few weeks had been filled with turmoil and just overall shock that she was even pregnant to begin with. Then with Harry leaving to be the international star that he was, it was all just made that much more stressful. The pictures that had been posted of them hadn’t made things any better. But now that she’d had about a month to come to terms with everything, she got excited little flutters when thinking about becoming a parent. She couldn’t wait to see her baby on the monitor that day, and hopefully learn the sex so her and Harry could get to picking names and making arrangements at their respective homes. 

Val had been expecting a significant weight gain with the new addition to her body, and all the pregnancy books’ proclamations that the baby was now the size of a large mango or a grapefruit or what have you. So, when she stepped on the scale and saw she’d only gained seven pounds from her last appointment, she was quite pleased. She felt like she’d gained fifteen, but she supposed the shifting of her pelvis to accommodate the pregnancy was probably to blame for that.

Sara took down Val’s vitals and chatted with Harry about his recent travel as she escorted them into their room. Harry was excited about the impending release of his album, and while Sara didn’t seem to be a big fan, she was just as excited for him. He seemed so genuinely happy and proud that she couldn’t help but smile largely at him and congratulate him. Harry soaked it up, obviously, beaming back at her and thanking her for her kind words. 

The twinkle in their eyes made Val uncomfortable in a way that she wasn’t willing to admit to, and she hated that she felt that way. She knew it was jealousy that was creeping up in her belly, but she pushed that aside. She knew Sara wasn’t flirting with Harry, since she more than likely assumed that Val and Harry were together. However, the same could not be said for Harry. He had no attachment to anyone, as far as Val knew, and so there was no reason that he wouldn’t flirt with Sara. The young nurse was around their age, and she was pretty with her silky blond hair and pink-tinged lips. She was exactly the sort Harry went for normally. Val was the one that was out of the ordinary for him. It was a surprise that they’d made it as long as they had together. Maybe it was inevitable that they broke up in the explosive way that they had. There was no way what they had were to ever last. Val had only been kidding herself if she thought they’d make their relationship last longer than it had. 

Val had to force a smile when Sara had bid them farewell and told them the doctor would be in with them shortly.

Since she’d started showing, Val had taken to wearing baggier clothes to conceal it as much as she could, so Harry hadn’t had the opportunity to see the new evidence of their child. So, he was a bit surprised—pleasantly so—when Val pulled up her shirt for the doctor to take the doppler to it. 

She was fuller at the bottom, where her stomach flowed into her pelvis, and she stayed plump until just above her belly button. Harry was a little taken with the figure. He’d always been amazed by pregnant women, from their ability to create life to the way they looked with the rounded bellies. Everything about it was appealing to him. A subconscious part of him was proud of himself for getting Valentina pregnant, in a sort of primal way. And he was emotional seeing proof of her carrying his child. 

“Can I?” Harry asked, voice a bit hoarse as he held his palm open just above her belly. He’d wanted to experience her first pregnancy as her husband, being able to love on her and her little belly any time he wanted. Having to be relegated to this position where he had to ask permission for everything like they were strangers was a blow to his heart. He couldn’t believe they were in this position. He never wanted it to be like this. 

“Of course, Harry,” she assured, seeing the raw emotion in his eyes. They were a bit glassy, like he was holding back tears, and she couldn’t take the way it tugged at her heart. As much as she was upset at him for everything, she couldn’t deny him the opportunity to be as close to this pregnancy as he could be. It was the least she could do for him when they weren’t in a relationship anymore. 

When he hesitated, Val reached out herself and pressed his hand to her belly, on the side where the doctor wasn’t moving the wand around. Val left her hand on his as his long fingers encased a good part of her abdomen. Harry heaved out a sigh and let his shoulders relax from the tensed position he hadn’t realised they’d been in. With his conversation with Nick fresh in his mind, and the anxiety it had been causing him, this moment was like a breath of fresh air. He felt relieved, in a sense, that Val was allowing him to touch her. Surely, it was only for his sake, and he knew that, but it still seemed like a small victory.

“Baby’s cooperating today,” Dr. Christiansen proclaimed, clearing his throat to try to break the moment the couple was having as polite as possible. He sensed there was a backstory to whatever was going on between them, but it really wasn’t his place to pry. He was just here to make sure mum and baby made it through happy and healthy.

“Can yeh tell the sex?” Harry asked, perking up. He kept his hand against Val’s stomach, but his eyes were transfixed on the screen. He could very clearly make out legs, but seeing as he wasn’t educated in analysing sonograms, he wasn’t sure what else he was seeing. 

“I can. Would you like to know?” the doctor asked, smiling warmly at the two.  

Harry and Val shared a glance, and with a quick smile to each other, they nodded at the doctor. It seemed even time ad animosity couldn’t take away the intense connection they shared. They’d always been able to tell what the other was thinking, and they had silent conversations easily. 

“Baby Styles is a boy.”

Val and Harry didn’t see each other again until he was on the Breakfast Show that Friday for the release of his album. After their appointment on Sunday, he’d gone straight to America, where he performed on the Today Show and sung a song that Val knew was about another girl. She pretended like it didn’t sting a little bit. Enough of the songs on the album were about herself, she knew, but the fact that at least one had been dedicated to someone else smarted a bit. She hadn’t been around for the final cut of the album, either, so who knew what else snuck its way on since the last time she’d listened to it. 

Val had had dinner with her parents and brother on Monday evening, and she’d told them the sex of the baby. Her parents were just glad that both their daughter and the baby had been given a clean bill of health once again, but her brother was especially excited at the news. He’d always wanted another boy to interact with, considering their dad’s sister had three girls, and all of their mum’s family was still in Mexico. Poor guy had grown up surrounded by girls since he was little. It was about time that he had a boy to play footie with and do lads things. Val thought it was adorable that Mateo was so happy to be an uncle. 

Rebecca and Quinn were over the moon that they were able to go shopping now. They’d been chomping at the bit to find out the sex so they could start drowning Val in cute little outfits and toys. They were somewhat disappointed to find out it wasn’t a girl, because girls outfits were “just so adorable,” they’d proclaimed, but they were excited nonetheless. 

Surprisingly, or unsurprisingly, Val got a phone call Monday midday, from a number she hadn’t seen pop up on her screen in months. It took her a few moments to answer, because her heart was thundering in her ears so loudly she could hardly hear. Finally, after three rings, she’d taken a deep breath and pressed the green button on her screen.

“Hello?” she answered, knowing full well who it was, but not having the mind to really answer any other way.

“Val, darling, it’s Anne.”

Just hearing her soothing voice and motherly tone was enough to set Val at ease. She let out a breathy laugh as she smiled hugely. Harry’s mother had always had this sort of affect on her. It was always nice to hear from her, and she’d been there as a shoulder to cry on, even during times when she was crying about Harry. Anne had always understood, and Val was infinitely grateful for it. 

“I know, Anne. How are you?”

“I’m fantastic, dear. Harry’s just told us the news. Can’t believe I’m gettin’ a grandson.”

The smile in her voice was evident, and Val was glad that she was so happy. She’d spent much of the last few months thinking that Anne resented her because of the breakup, but it was good to hear her in such high spirits, especially with everything that was going on with their family. 

“Yeah, my mum and dad are excited, too. Mateo’s glad to have a nephew,” Val laughed.

“Gem’s kinda disappointed it isn’t a girl, but she’ll get over it,” Anne snickered. 

Gemma was another point of contention for Val. Her and Harry’s sister had gotten along so well. They were best friends. But ever since the breakup, they’d barely spoken. Right after she’d heard, Gemma had called Val to sympathise over how big of a prat Harry was, and she’d let Val cry a bit over the phone. They’d gone out the next week to have coffee as well, and things had seemed fine. But Val hadn’t heard from the other girl since then, aside from the occasional tag in a meme on Twitter or Instagram. It was sad, really. Valentina missed her dearly.

“Gem’s just gonna have to have her own babies, isn’t she?” Val joked. 

“Can yeh tell her that?” Anne asked, sounding exasperated. “Thought I’d get a grandbaby out of her first. She’s laggin’ a bit.”

Val chuckled. “Leave her alone. She’ll come around eventually.”

Without even being in Anne’s presence, she could sense the sudden shift in mood. Where they had previously been jovial and a little giddy, it was now more somber, and Val could already tell where this conversation was headed. She hadn’t spoken to Anne since the breakup, and she knew the possibility of her having questions that Harry hadn’t answered was high. While Harry was open with his mother due to their close relationship, Anne was already going through her own hardship. It was entirely possible that he wasn’t telling her everything because he wanted to lessen her worries. While Val and Harry’s relationship wasn’t really Anne’s responsibility, she loved both of those kids with her whole heart, so she was involved almost as much as they were. Anne had been the first one to believe that they were going to get married. She’d been properly crushed when Harry had told her they’d broken up. 

“How are you lot handling this?” Anne asked, her tone more soft and careful. She didn’t want to overstep her bounds, but she was concerned. She had a feeling her son wasn’t telling her everything, and she could count on Valentina to be candid with her. 

Val sighed. “As best as we can, honestly. We’re just focused on the baby. It’s still early, so we haven’t made any concrete decisions yet.”

“Baby’s gonna be here faster than you imagine,” Anne warned. “And there’s lots for yeh to figure out. Custody arrangement, name, not to mention yeh have to decide how the media’s gonna play into this.”

At the mention of a custody arrangement, Val balked and there was a sudden feeling of nausea that settled in her stomach. Custody arrangement was not something any person wanted to have to consider when having a baby. She hadn’t really thought about that up until that moment. She did not want to have to think about all that. She never wanted her baby to have to worry about what parent she was staying with any given day or week. Val herself had been blessed enough to have two parents that had stayed married her entire life. Harry hadn’t been as fortunate, and she knew he had hated having to go back and forth between his mum and dad as he’d been growing up. She knew neither of them wanted to put their son through that, but what choice did they have?

“I know,” Val whispered, and correctly sensing her unease, Anne had changed the subject. Bless her.

Harry was in a special mood come Friday morning. 

It was extremely early, even for Val who had been doing these early mornings for years, but Harry came bounding in, looking way too good for how ridiculous she initially thought his suit was, and acting way too peppy. He said good morning to every person he passed in the halls, shook hands with the interns, and even indulged an employee’s little girl to a quick chat, a photo, and a signature on an old One Direction poster she brought along with her. He was just as kind and lovely as he always was, but there was a bit more bounce to his step and giddiness to his face. The release of his first solo album was obviously a big deal to him, and Val was feeling pretty privileged to be here with him on this day. She’d been with him through a lot of the writing and recording process of the album, and to finally see the final result get the love it deserved…it was amazing.

“Good morning, Harold,” Nick greeted while they were off air. Val was sat in her seat just on the other side of Nick, going over the playlist until Harry was to go on and play some of the songs on his album. She was in charge of queuing up the songs each morning, and Nick would make small adjustments when requests came in. It was one of the easier parts of her work days.

“Good morning, Nicholas,” Harry greeted, putting a venti cup of Starbucks coffee down in front of the older man. He bent down and pressed a kiss to the top of his head, which made Nick scrunch up his nose but smile at Harry fondly. “Soy latte with an an extra shot of espresso.”

“Good morning, Valentina,” Harry said, moving on to put down the same size cup in front of Val. He did the same as he had with Nick, but instead of the top of her head, Harry kissed her cheek with a smack that sort of surprised her, but she accepted it, not wanting to bring down his mood with a protest. “And a chai tea latte, since I’m sure yeh’ve already had your one allotted cup of coffee this morning.”

Val grumbled her affirmation, but took the cup thankfully. She really was experiencing pretty hardcore caffeine withdrawals due to the abstinence during pregnancy. It was making her a touch grumpy.

“Thanks,” she hummed, inhaling the spicy scent of the chai. “Good morning, Harry.”

Harry smiled as he took the empty seat beside Val. She thankfully didn’t even react when Harry reached over and placed his hand over her tummy. He gave a soft rub with his thumb over the swell of her belly. “Hows baby doing?”

“Good, been pretty active since the last appointment.” As if he’d heard his mum, the baby gave a firm push against the wall of her stomach, making her jump a little at the abruptness of it. “And now he’s awake, apparently.”

“He’d been still before this?” Harry asked, pressing his hand a bit firmer into the skin to try to feel it again. It wasn’t the first time he felt it, as he’d felt that telltale little bump the day of their appointment, but he was still in awe. There was a little being in there that was moving around and awake.

“Yeah. Hasn’t made a peep. Must know daddy’s here.”

The smile on Harry’s face rivaled any she’d ever seen him give in the entire time she’d known him. His bottom lip slipped between his teeth, and he looked like that boy she’d met all those year ago, just a smidgen cheeky and a lot a bit smoulder-y, and it was really killing her. There was a fluttering in her tummy that had nothing to do with the baby, and she quite liked it. She hadn’t felt it in a while. 

It was conflicting, though, because it was Harry.

Her hormones were fucked. She didn’t really like it. She was still hurt and upset, but her heart was still with him. And her body obviously still craved him. She was getting to that point in the pregnancy when she was horny more often than not, and Harry was who popped in her mind in the same vain. And thinking of him intimately like that again after months of suppressing those thoughts made her remember all the great times they’d had together. And then she got all heart-warmed about how great he’d been when he was there. Those cute moments where it was just them and they had fun and they loved each other endlessly. Those drew her in and made her miss him. But she always made sure her head took back over and reminded her that things had been bad when they broke up. 

They’re moment was broken by a hesitant but urgent Nick, who had to get Harry on the other side of the desk to start their morning. Val took the rest of the time to listen to Harry and Nick banter back and forth as they listened to his album. She hadn’t paid much mind to the songs, since they were ones she’d heard before. That was until one started in with a dodged explanation from Harry, the guitar cords soft and Harry’s voice even softer.

It only took a few seconds into the song to realise what it was about. Nick had introduced it as From the Dining Table. The lyrics were intensely intimate and sorrowful, and Val’s world sort of paused for the duration of the song. Her eyes locked on Harry’s, who was already looking at her with an intense gaze, which was full of knowing and remorse. 

The lyrics stuck in her throat in that awful way that foreboded a crying jag, and that’s exactly what happened a few seconds later as tears stung in her eyes. She sniffled once to try to suppress it, and then it was all over. She excused herself from the room, quickly walking across the hall to the restroom. 

It took only a two second delay for Harry to burst in right behind her. Him and Nick had already signed off before that last song, and Jeff had tried herding him away, since he had a One Show to get to pretty soon after the Breakfast Show, but he’d brushed past him to get to Val. 

“Valentina,” he called, seeing her stood in one of the stalls, ripping toilet paper off the roll to dab at her eyes. 

“What?” she sniffled, voice thick with her tears. 

“Can we talk, please?” Harry didn’t want to beg, but he was at the point where he had no other options. They’d gone a month and a half of being reunited, and they still hadn’t talked about any of the things that were weighing heavy on them. Val seemed to be avoiding it every time Harry even attempted to start a conversation about it, and he was sick of it, frankly. He couldn’t take this awkward limbo of trying to coparent and maintain a relationship with her while also having this history of such intense love and compassion between them. 

“Not now, Harry,” she sighed. “You’ve got places to be and I’ve got a job to get back to.”

“I don’t think Nick would mind if yeh left for the rest of the day, and I have time.”

“Harry…” she warned. She balled up her wad of tissue and threw it away, a bit bothered by how much of her makeup was coming off into it. 

“We can’t keep tiptoeing around all this! We’re havin’ a baby, Valentina. We need to be in this together, and we can’t do that if yeh keep pushin’ me away.”

“Where was this when we were together?” she demanded, angry. She was trying not to raise her voice, since this was her place of work, but she was getting worked up in the worst way. Her feelings of nostalgia from earlier were long gone. “How can yeh care now but not’ve given a shit four months ago? Why are yeh so concerned about our relationship now?” She really hated how sloppy her accent got when she was upset, but she couldn’t care about it now.

“Because I’m still in love with yeh! I want us to be okay for our baby! What about that is so hard to understand?” Harry was gripping at his hair now, his frustration needing to be exuded physically or else he would just about explode.  

“What’s hard to understand is why that matters now but not back in January when you’d promised to be there! We broke up because yeh failed to show up when it mattered. All I’ve ever done is support you and be there for you for those important moments, even when it meant missing something that I had planned. But you couldn’t be fucked when it was something that was important to me! All our friends and family were with me to celebrate my first solo broadcast, meanwhile you were out with your mates gettin’ pissed in some bar! And you’ve never even apologised for it.”

“That was one time, Val,” he huffed, pulling at his bottom lip. 

“No it wasn’t! You think I broke up with you over a one-time thing? You weren’t there for the celebration when I got hired on at BBC after graduation. You weren’t there for my birthday two years in a row. You weren’t there at my actual graduation. You missed out on a lot of things Harry, and they were all because something in your life was more important than mine. I don’t see how any of that has changed now that I’m pregnant. The baby may be your priority now, but that doesn’t inherently include me. I’d never expect it to, but just because I’m havin’ your baby doesn’t mean I’m gonna fall back into your arms.”

Harry was silent, and Val saw the way his chest heaved with his laboured breath and his jaw ticked as he clenched it. Harry only ever got silent during an argument when he was either too angry and didn’t want to say any words in anger that he may regret later, or when he knew he was in the wrong and really had nothing else to say. Val wasn’t sure if she was ready to face either of them. 

Finally, he took a deep breath that seemed to ease him a bit. He closed his eyes on his exhale and didn’t reopen them until he’d let it all out. The emotion she saw in them once they met hers again was heartbreaking, yet there was also something uplifting and determined as well. A determined Harry was something to be wary of, though. He was a force to be reckoned with. 

With no warning, Harry took a step closer to her and wrapped her in his arms, cocooning her in his chest. He buried his face into the crook of her neck and kept himself there, even when Val struggled at first. However, she was a sucker for his warm embraces, so it only took her a moment to relax and melt herself into him, tucking herself against him. The comforting, intimate contact after such a long time of only associating Harry with all things negative was too much for her. Her tears started up again, and she couldn’t even blame the hormones on that one. This was all her and her pent up emotions about the only boy she’d ever truly loved, and who she’d never actually fallen out of love with. It was intense. 

“I’m sorry,” Harry whispered into her skin as she sobbed. He clutched her tighter when her frame rattled with them. “I’m so sorry. I was such a shit boyfriend, and I knew I was pushing your important things aside for my own, and I’m sorry. I was selfish and a prick and I never deserved your unwavering support. Yeh can never know how fuckin’ sorry I am. Yeh were my world, and I’m sorry I didn’t show yeh that enough. Yeh deserve so much more than I can ever offer, but I love you so much. I’m so sorry.”

And it wasn’t all fixed with his apology. It would take them time to heal and rebuild that trust they’d once had. But it was enough for that moment. It was the first stitch in Val’s tattered heart, but it was enough to keep her going.

#harry styles #harry styles oneshot #harry styles imagine #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fanfic #dad!harry #harry styles fluff #harry styles angst #harry styles au #harry styles blurb #harry styles one shot

[crosbys-guccifloral-crocs]

What Was Once Mine - Part III

AN: sorry for the delay everyone! I hope you enjoy part 3! Without further ado, here it is...

Before you start -- Part I and II -- ALSO: I have absolutely NO ill feelings toward Jeffrey Azoff or who he is as a person. The character bashing and villain created in this story is purely FICTION. Jeff is actually an amazing little bean. 

Warnings: none really -- fluff, angst, mentioned cheating. 

Word Count: 2,474

Previously: “Please, Y/N enough with the small talk. I can’t take it. I miss you, I miss Lennie. This is the most time we’ve spent with one another since she was born 2 months ago. She needs us. I need us. Please, just let me explain, no excuses. And even after all of it, if you still don’t want me, I’ll let you go, just please let me try. Now, let’s go inside and chat, yeah?” Harry asks looking her in the eyes and putting a strand of her beautiful hair behind her ear. 

“Y/N — baby, listen to me, here I am, in front of you trying to tell you tha’ I don’t even remember sleeping with this woman. I don’t know how the panties got in my pocket. I’m not in denial about anything, my love. I truly, truly do not even remember sleeping with anyone. I could say tha’ I was drunk and I didn’t know what I was doing and tha’ it was a mistake, but I know that none of tha’ will fix what I’ve done. So I stand here today, on what has been one of the greatest days we’ve ever experienced as a family, and I vow to show you that I will change. I need to be better for you and for Lennon. I love yeh, so, so much and I’m sorry tha’ I hurt yeh. But I truly believe tha’ we are stronger than one mistake. Than my mistake.” Harry was begging now, practically on his knees in front of his wife.

“Harry, honey. What you did was nearly unforgivable. I never, ever thought that you of all people would hurt me so badly. And the fact that you did it before our child even got to experience a real family is unfathomable. But you’ve been here for her lately, regardless of our situation. And that’s what matters. I’m happy to continue to be with you when Lennie is involved, but I don’t think we can ever get back to what we were. I’m sorry, Harry. You should probably go. Lennon’s suitcase is packed and waiting by the door. I’ll pick her up Wednesday after work or Gemma will. I’ll let you know as soon as I can.” Y/N says wiping hastily at her teary eyes and kissing her baby goodbye as she turns to leave the room and head upstairs.

“Y/N, love! Wait I—” Harry makes a move to run up the stairs after her but hears a door slam shut.

“Well, little bird, I guess it���s just you and me. Let’s go, love.” Harry says to Lennon as she looks up at her father and chews on her fingers. Clueless to the chaos that is her parents lives.

Meanwhile, upstairs in the master suite of her home, Y/N cries into her knees as she brings them up to her chest in the bathtub. The water from the shower is cascading down her back; the falling water drowning out the sounds of her muffled cries.

“C’mon my love. You’ve got this! One more push and our little bird will be here! You can do it!” Harry encouraged.

“I can’t, H. It hurts too much.”

“Yes you can, baby. Don’t you want to meet our baby girl? She’ll be so lucky to have you as her mummy. I know it.”

Those few words gave Y/N all the encouragement she needed to bring their little love into the world. As the doctor laid the baby on Y/N’s chest, she looked at Harry and saw him looking at her and their daughter with more pride and love than he ever thought possible. No awards or number one singles or albums could ever amount to a moment so breathtaking and incredible as seeing one’s wife birth his first born. She (the baby) was so pure and so good. Being brought into a world that had all recently turned to shit. On what should have been the happiest day of their lives, without question it held an air of misfortune. Knowing that when Y/N and Harry brought their daughter home later that day he would not get to stay. But for that moment, in that hospital room as new parents, they were a family.

“Welcome to the world, Lennon Gemma Styles. We’ve been waiting for you a long time.” Y/N said, crying and she stroked her daughter’s cheek.

Later that day when harry came home from visiting Adam and his children with baby Lennie he noticed a piece of paper wedged in the door of his apartment. With Lennon in her baby Björn on his chest he kissed her head and read the note

H,

There’s something I need to tell you. Meet me at Daunt Books at 5 pm. I’ll be waiting by the stairs.

C.

Huh. “I wonder what this could be about, little bird.” Harry wondered aloud. Checking his watch, he noticed that it was only 3 pm. He still had 2 hours before he had to meet this mystery informant.

“Let’s have a snack, yeah? Are yeh hungry pretty girl?” He smiled at her, unstrapping her from the Björn and walking her into the kitchen.

 *** At the bookstore *** 

“Pssttt. Harry, over here!” He hears a feminine voice whisper. Just then a small dark haired figure emerges from behind the bookstore staircase.

“Cayla? That are you doing here?” Harry asks, dumbfounded.

“H. There’s something you need to know about what happened that night on tour.” Cayla says taking Lennon’s small hand in her own as she stands in front of Harry.

“It was Jeff’s fault, Harry. Not yours. He put E (ecstasy) in your drink that night. Why do you think you couldn’t remember anything the next day? I told myself I wasn’t going to tell you, I would just let it be. But I can’t stand to see your world falling apart.”

“First of all, don’t touch my daughter. And second, why didn’t you come forward months ago when my world was crashing down around me? Huh? I lost everything because of what ‘supposedly’ happened that night! For the last 5 months the love of my life has hated me! And for the last 2 months my baby girl has grown up without both of her parents together! But… how do I know you’re telling the truth? Why would Jeff even do something like that? Also, don’t call me “H” that title is reserved for my wife and family.” Harry seethes, stepping away and shielding his daughter from the woman who has all but ruined his life.

“Jeff isn’t who you think he is, Harry. You can trust me on that. I know I’m likely to be the very last person on this planet that you should trust, but for the sake of your marriage and your daughter, please just hear me out. Jeff planned this for months, Harry. I’m an actress, Jeff spiked your drink at the bar in Toronto that night and told me to convince you that we slept together. He told me that if I didn’t he would ruin my career, so I took you back to your hotel room and placed my panties in your pocket. All we did that night was sleep, I promise you that. I even have the video of him spiking your drink on my phone. Here.” Cayla says, passing Harry her phone.

** In the video **  

**Jeff is seen dropping which, would most likely have been an ecstasy tab into Harry’s gin and cranberry juice while H is off in the distance somewhere. ** “Now, Cayla… here’s the plan, once H drinks this I want you to do whatever you need to in order to get him to leave with you.” Jeff says.

“Why are you doing this Jeff? What has Harry – or his poor wife ever done to you?” Cayla replies.

“He hasn’t done anything – yet. But that bitch, Y/N is ruining his life. She’s always held him back. Being his classic ball and chain. And now, she’s pregnant! Soon enough, he’ll stop touring and maybe even performing altogether, and I’ll be out of a job. But I’m not just doing this for me. I’m saving all of our careers. Mitch’s, Adam’s, Clare’s, Sarah’s and especially Harry’s. Great songs come from painful experiences so just imagine what a divorce and single parenthood could do for Harry’s career. I can just smell a number one album in the works. And don’t think I forgot about you.” Jeff smirks, as he passes Cayla an envelope across the bar. $10,000 in cash.

“You can expect the other half when the job is complete and done to my satisfaction.”

** End vid **

“He sent me the other half of the money when news broke that you and Y/N had separated. I wanted to tell you about it right away, but I had no other way to reach you other than making the trip out here. And I had absolutely no intention of bringing what I had done to the attention of the press. so until I had the money, I couldn’t truly repent for what I’ve done. I don’t want Jeff’s dirty money. So please, please accept my apology. I hope everything works out for you.” Cayla cries, tearing up as she hands Harry a USB drive and an envelope with $20,000 in cash inside.

“Well, I appreciate your apology Cayla. But I’m fairly certain my relationship with my wife is far beyond repair. Unless by some miracle she believes this crazy tale and forgives me. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I think I need some air.” Harry nods as he departs up the stairs of the bookshop and down the familiar London streets.

“Hey, Gem, it’s kind of a long story, but could you meet me at my apartment in 20? I need you to watch Len for a bit. I’ll explain everything as best I can when you get here, just please hurry.” Harry says in a breathless panic over the phone.        

“Of course, H. calm down I’m on my way.” Gemma replies.

“H? are you home? I came as soon as I could.” Gemma says calling out into the apartment for her baby brother and niece.

Gemma soon finds Harry holding Lennon to his chest and crying rather heavily.

“Oh, God, H are you ok? Is it Lennon?” Gemma wonders kneeling down in front of Harry.

“N-No, we’re fine, physically… b-but there’s something I need to tell you.” Harry stutters, as he proceeds to tell his sister what happened that fateful night.

* * *

“I �� wow, H. this is unbelievable. You need to go to her, now. I’ll watch the princess. Now go get your girl, Har. And we’ll bring that bastard down soon enough.” Gemma responds taking Lennon from Harry so he can stand from the sofa.

“Okay, bye baby girl. Daddy loves you so much. I’ll be back, hopefully with mumma. See you soon.” Harry coos at his baby girl, kissing her forehead as she squirms and sleeps in Gemma’s arms.

*** At Y/N’s house ***

After her bath and therapeutic crying session earlier in the day, Y/N had finally made peace with the fact that her marriage may truly be over, while also pining over what she and Harry once were. But deep down she knew that she never wanted it to end.

Suddenly a faint knock at the front door brought her out of her trance and she peeled her eyes away from her wedding album, making her way down the stairs.

Opening the door to the most welcoming sight she had seen all day – her former knight in shining armour. “H-hey, H. what are you doing here?” Y/N questions wiping tears from her eyes. Her face soon void of any emotion other than the trail of tears glistening on her puffy red cheeks.  

“Baby, there’s something I really need to tell you. – Wait… have you been crying?” He rebuttals, rubbing a thumb over Y/N’s soft, rosy cheek. “What’s wrong, love?”

“Nothing, H, I’m fine, promise. What are you doing here? Where’s little bird?” his wife asks, slightly panicked.

“She’s okay, love. She’s with Gem at the apartment. I had to come alone, quickly. You may want to sit down for what I’m about to tell you.”

“Oh, God. Is it bad? It’s that girl isn’t it? She’s pregnant, isn’t she? Oh, God, I knew it.” Y/N cries breaking down into an even bigger puddle of tears and collapsing into Harry’s chest.

Though extremely mortified by her train of thought, Harry can’t help but let out the tiniest chuckle. “Actually, my love, that’s what I’m here to talk to you about. It’s extremely good news – well, if you could call it that I guess.”

“Wait, what?! You’re happy that you knocked up your mistress?!” Y/N shrieks in horror looking up at Harry’s emerald green eyes.

“No, baby, she’s not pregnant, I promise. Let’s go upstairs and chat shall we?” He suggests, suddenly getting serious as he takes her by the hand and leads her up the stairs to their (well her) bedroom.

Before he begins his explanation of that night his eyes can’t help but drift to the photo album laid out on their bed. On display are two photos representing the two happiest days of his life – his wedding day, and the birth of his little precious princess. He owes every happiness during those days, and every other day for the last 6 years to his beautiful wife. He can only hope that what he reveals to her in the next hour or so will be able to restore that happiness and not only repair, but strengthen their bonds as a couple and a family.

                                                 * * *

“What… ?! But why would Jeff do something so cruel? What did you or I ever do to him?” Y/N asks, clearly baffled by the situation and the video that she had just witnessed. “He ruined everything for us, H! I’m so sorry, baby. I’m sorry I kept Lennon from you for so long, I’m so sorry I didn’t believe you, baby.” Y/N cries, collapsing into Harry’s arms.

“No, baby, shh. It’s not your fault beautiful. Not even I knew what was real. Now, can we put this all behind us and move on?” Harry smiles, wiping his wife’s tears from her cheeks before looking her in the eyes as if to ask her permission to kiss her.

Y/N nods quickly and stands on her tippy toes to reach her husband’s lips, pulling him into the most passionate kiss that they have shared in over 5 excruciatingly painful months spent apart. Y/N is quick to push her husband down on the bed and straddle him, all without detaching their lips.  

“Mhm, Y/N, baby… wait. As much as I would love to make love to you right now, I think we are both a little bit too vulnerable. Let’s just call Gem and tell her to bring little bird home, yeah? I missed my girls. Can we just spend tonight as a family? I’ve not had both m’girls together for longer than a day before.” H smiles as he says this, looking up at his wife with the purest and loving expression.

“Of course we can, my love. But tomorrow, we make love. After we bring down that smug bastard. Now let’s get our baby over here.” Y/N assures. 

What did ya’ll think?! feedback is LOVE!! 

#harry styles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fic #harry styles angst #harry styles imagine #harry styles fluff #harry styles x y/n #harry styles x reader #dad!harry #fluff #angst

[nocturnememory]

What did you mean when you wrote that Voldie still had all his ribs? Is it sth about his missing backbone? I‘m clearly not philosophical enough to understand this

Okay, I’ve actually gotten a few questions about this now, so I suppose I’ll try to explain some things as best I can without ruining anything

This is so Extra and so Long, but it was the best way I could think of to explain it all, under the cut because I ramble and I literally wrote an essay. :/

Myths and Ichor Explained

Okay, so, I have this problem where I show instead of tell a lot. Too much, probably. It’s a bad habit I have that I’m trying to find some sort of middle ground on lol.

So, I often to use myths, images, ideas or sometimes just like, a word to convey a meaning or an implication.

Sometimes, obviously, I am too vague or because I’m the one writing it and I’m using myths/idea/stories I know… I don’t really consider that readers might not understand the message behind the implication.

I’ve had a few questions about the rib thing, and I think it’ll help explain things if I explain how I use my…writing devices? Methods of storytelling, maybe.

So, you know when your watching a horror movie and the scene is dark and your eyes are peeled and your hearts thumping because the music is going and the character on the screen is scared and so are you because you know that something’s going to happen.

And then it does, and you jump or you laugh or duck and move on.

For me, the memorable part of that moment isn’t the jump scare, it’s the moments before, it’s watching the shadows and wanting to see something more, hoping to see something to know what’s coming.

The memorable parts aren’t always when the scary thing is revealed because maybe it’s corny or not what you wanted— but do you remember that face in the mirror? Or the furniture that moved on its own? All those hints and build up are what make that movie better.

For me, it’s the same thing in stories. It isn’t always about the destination, because maybe you won’t be happy with the end. I mean, look at Harry Potter, how few of us actually like the epilogue, how few of us view Cursed Child as canon. But, give us a boy in a cupboard, give us platform, a man with a misspelt birthday cake and we’re all a little bit wizards, aren’t we?

The memorable things, for me, are the smaller things. The ideas that drag through a narrative and come out at the end into something that makes you go, oh.

Like a snitch.

Or a cloak.

Or a boy who lived. Twice.

And that, for me, is part of how I write— trying to focus on the smaller things, the memorable things, so that hopefully, by the end, you’ll go, oh.

But, I don’t want to confuse you, I’m still learning, and I know I’m using myths/imagery that maybe not everyone knows.

So, this is kind of how I approach using myths or imagery in Ichor:

Hades and Persephone, I think is the most obvious one, due to the interludes.

Here’s a good place to read about them:

http://www.theoi.com/Khthonios/HaidesPersephone1.html

For the sake of argument, and to avoid an argument lol, I’ve always based my view on this myth on the source material. Which, if you follow that nifty link, contains the ancient Greek versions of the myth, sourcing the Homeric Hymn to Demeter, the Orphic Hymns, and Hesiod’s Theogony.

The basic idea of why this myth is so impactful on Ichor is, I hope, conveyed in the Interludes.

It’s about entitlement, about ownership, about claiming another person and viewing them as lesser, maybe not in a way you mean to be harmful, but anytime you believe you have a right to someone, you are, in essence making them lesser.

Voldemort views Harrie as a part of himself, and because of that view he believes he owns her. And because he owns her he has a right to her. And if he has a right to her then he has a right to use her.

And this is the same for Hades, he sees Persephone and he takes her. There’s a belief there, that owning is permission, that entitlement is somehow a reason, an explanation, an excuse.

But it’s not.

There’s a point to compare here, that both of these characters act out of selfishness, that they act physically because of it. Both characters operate on the belief that their desire outweighs the want of the other. And here, it’s important to note, that neither one truly believes that they’re right, they know they aren’t, they both, on some level, know they’re in the wrong. And most importantly, I think, is that both of them, before they act, seek validation.

Hades go to Zeus:

 Hades doesn’t need permission. Hades wants validation. Hades wants the deed and the title and a palm full of a declaration.

Voldemort knows he’s wrong but at the same time he feels so entitled to Harrie that he builds a contract and goes to Dumbledore for the sole purpose of validating himself.

Rape, forcing oneself onto another without concern for permission. But you gave me permission, didn’t you, Harrie. You signed that fucking contract.

The comparable parts of the myth don’t end there, I mean, Voldemort and Harrie aren’t ruling an underworld with a three-headed dog, but, the evolution into something more is still comparable.

It’s all about compromise, about understanding the damage you caused another person, about finding a way through that hurt and coming out stronger.

It’s a pretty good allegory, really. For finding strength, your voice, for being able say, you hurt me and I know you’re sorry, but that isn’t enough. About finding yourself, whether you’re an adult already or just a girl in a garden (or a cupboard, you know?)

The second major one, arguably more impactful one is The Rib Thing.

Also known as Adam and Eve, circa the Garden of Eden

Go here for further reading: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eve

Basic summary: Adam is lonely in the garden, God comes down, takes a rib from the poor boy’s side and from it, creates Eve.

Now this myth itself isn’t so much related to the characters in Ichor so much as the idea of it is. It isn’t about finding parallels in the narrative but rather offering a sort of physical representation to the whole Horcrux/soul thing.

When you’re talking/reading/thinking about something like souls, how do you convey the weight of them? How do you convey percentages without falling into the same sort of lackluster lines and ideas?

How do you, as a reader, or me as a writer, convey what a soul means?

It’s all so theoretical and… evasive, really.

I can say, Voldemort wants Harrie because she carries his soul, he wants her because she’s got half his soul, a seventh of his soul, two third of his soul. But what does that do for you? Nothing really, at least not for me.

It’s all just numbers on a page.

I can tell you about a soul all day long, but it’s just words, there’s nothing there to really see.

But for me, when you read about Voldemort equating Harrie/Horcrux to the myth of Adam and Eve:

He thinks about God reaching into Adam’s chest and pulling out a bloody, white rib; a consecrated voice not meant for mortal ears

She comes from you because she is for you.

Did you think this would be painless?    

And then having him carry that belief into something physical, his ribs…

A soul becomes something physical for you to weigh. It’s a part of something, it isn’t so theoretical anymore but something real to imagine. Anytime Voldemort touches his ribs, there’s a reason, an ache, an idea behind it.

What’s a soul to Voldemort, it’s an ache, a bone, a thing missing.

Except, it’s not.

He has all his ribs.

And this is where I have to toe the line on what I’m getting at in the narrative and why this means something; because so much of what enables Voldemort is his own belief in his ownership of Harrie and it’s all due to that one fucking rib (soul piece).

The idea of the rib and what it represents is more important than the bone itself, you know? There’s meaning behind the fact that its whole that I can’t really explain without sort of spoiling the build in the narrative, without ruining some of the things that will be coming up as Harrie and Voldemort really come together and learn about themselves and each other.

But I do want you to have something to be able to build on, to understand their connection in a more real sense, a sense that isn’t always one of them hurting, or emotion bleeding from one to the other because that’s so loud and obvious and I get the appeal of jump scares, I do, but sometimes I like the shadows more.

If his soul is something tangible for you to picture, a white bone stuck inside of him, when I say he has all of them, you think, a full rib cage, you think, is Harrie missing one? If he has all his ribs then how are they connected?

And that’s sort of the idea, really, giving you images and ideas and then building on them so that when I imply that he’s got a full soul, you aren’t just reading it, but imagining it as well.

That as I build on their connection and what the impact of souls and Horcruxes are…

It’s not just some ball of light, or whatever you picture a soul to be if you picture anything at all… but something real, something there, something that every time I mention Voldemort touching his ribs you go

Oh.

[aroacehogwarts]

could hufflepuff mod write about demiromantic pansexual trans boy lily and biromantic demisexual trans girl james raising harry together? (i'm not sure what james and lily would change their names to, but i think jamie would work for james!)

I’m glad people (or maybe just one of you =p ) are enjoying these types of stories!

(Trans people aren’t required to change their names, and if they do, it doesn’t have to be close to their deadname. I know that makes things easier in fandom so we know who is who but for the sake of representing this, I chose the name Noah for Lily, who I feel would like the softer qualities of both names, though in Rowling-verse, it’s pretty likely she would choose some sort of floral-inspired name for her middle name, like maybe Ash, Basil, Sage, or Rowan.)

~

Noah thought it all a little flowery and dramatic, but he truly did love Jamie, and what was wrong with indulging your significant other every now and then? With a flick of his wand, he finished conjuring the last of the flowers to decorate the Potter’s backyard. With a deep breath, he brushed his suit off, felt in the pocket to ensure the ring was there, and situated himself in the middle of the arrangement he’d conjured. In just a few minutes, Sirius, Remus, and Peter would all return to the Potter’s House, where Euphemia would insist on inviting them all in for some tea. Jamie would protest that they’d just gone out for food, but Peter would claim he was still hungry and Remus would shrug like ‘who can argue with your mum?’, then Sirius would drag them all in and flash Jamie a grin. Because the two were so close, the grin would give Jamie her first flutters that something was up. When Euphemia said it was such a nice night that they should gather in the backyard for tea, Jamie would know before she stepped outside what -

Noah smiled at his beloved. He was certain his hands were shaking.

Jamie shook her head and tried to back inside, but an excitable Sirius gave her a rough push towards Jamie. “N-now?” she asked, stumbling towards Noah.

Noah knelt to one knee, presenting the ring to Jaime. He did his best to block out Euphemia, Fleamont, Sirius, Remus, Peter, Marlene, and Alice (the last two of which had been hiding inside in waiting), gathered and grinning back near the house.

“You know better than anyone how rough a start we had, Jamie,” he started, the words tumbling out too low and fast to hide just how nervous he was, “but you should also know better than anyone else what we’ve been through and just how much I love you. I don’t know how long it will be, but I want to spend every last second of our life together. Will you marry me? Potter?”

And then, as if she’d been stuck in slow motion, Jamie rushed the rest of the way to him, bending to pull him up and kiss him, deeply, desperately. “Yeah, of course, No’! Dammit, put that ring on me now.”

Noah laughed as he slid the ring on Jamie’s finger as their friends and family came out to hug and celebrate with them.

.

Jamie had thought she was the only trans person at Hogwarts. What a silly thought that had been. In fifth year, everything began changing, and that’s when she bit the jinx and came out and moved into a dorm that seemed oddly lonely compared to where she’d slept her first few years.

In the week that followed her coming out (which was in true, spectacular Marauder’s style thanks to her amazing friends), Professor Flitwick gave her five points for good spellwork when she was distracted and goofing off in class, Professor McGonagall asked her to come to her office and treated her to some biscuits, no less than 17 students (spanning all four Houses, no less) thanked her or high fived her for “you know what you did”, and the student he’d been voraciously pursuing since first year offered his (hers at the time) hand and said “things have been quieting down between us for a while now. What do you say to officially starting offer?” It wasn’t until a year later that Noah came out and switched dorms, but that moment had meant everything to Jamie.

.

“That’s actually called asexuality,” Remus nonchalantly remarked, taking his third homemade chocolate chip cookie of the night.

“Hm?” Jamie distractedly asked, Noah’s legs in her lap as she played with his hair, simply adoring his new haircut.

“What you just described. Well, technically, asexual spectrum - and more specifically, demisexuality. You know. You only romanticaly liking Noah until long after you two became friends and started dating.”

“Wait, what?” Noah said, slapping Jamie’s hands away. He looked very intensely at Remus and Jamie took that as a sign to pay attention.

Remus sighed. “Was that a please-repeat-what-you-said-for-a-third-time-what?”

An annoyed look crossed Noah’s face and he pushed hard down on Jamie’s shoulder in order to stand. The movement was awkward thanks to the eight month old baby growing inside of him. “Remus,” he started, Jamie quickly shifting to help push her husband up to standing all the way, “I am super pregnant, which is making me incredibly uncomfortable. I’ve been holding what is probably my 50th pee of the day for the past half hour, trying to block out your loud-as-Merlin’s-balls-slapping-together cookie crunching, and my ankles are just throbbing. I am also getting more and more dysphoric by the day, so much so that I’m not sure how I’m going to survive another month of this, no matter how much I want this little one, and I was having what was the most intimate time with my partner since this pregnancy began and you and the other’s refused to let us have any time alone. So yeah, when I ask you to actually explain what you’ve barely hinted at twice, I am really asking you to explain.”

Jamie ducked her face below the couch to try and smother out the giggles. She actually heard Moony’s gulp as he set down the cookie and tried to placate Noah with a surrendering hand gesture. Face smoothed over, Jamie peeked up over the couch.

And that’s when Remus gave them a thorough and informative explanation on asexuality and the asexual spectrum. Noah finally took a break to pee, and when he returned, Remus finished by talking about aromanticism. Then, seemingly for good measure, offered to talk about other identities, such polysexual, polyromantic, and nonbinary identities.

Jamie thought that Remus could have shared this information with them much sooner. She immediately pegged herself as demisexual, finally clicking into place what her sexuality was. Not just bisexual but bi and demisexual. For once, she did her thinking quietly, as Noah murmured. “Demiromantic. Oooooh.”

“Hey!” Jamie said. “Does that make us demi buddies?”

Noah rolled his eyes, but laughed. “Demi multisexual buddies,” he smiled. Noah was pansexual. Seems like Remus’ lecture had done the best job of distracting Noah from his dysphoria yet, as her husband looked more comfortable - if he could be called comfortable at this point - than he had in months.

“Hey, how long’ve you been sitting on all that, Moony?” Noah had been the one to teach them (well, Remus, who had then shared it with the rest of the Marauders) about things like gay and bi and pan (Remus was bi while Sirius was gay, they’d eventually realized), so it was interesting now for Remus to be on the sharing side and Noah the learning side.

“Erm… a couple years now. A while after Noah helped me realize I was bi, I got curious. Were these muggle-only terms? Did we have our own terms that had been created? Were there other possibilities, other identities? How common have these been throughout history? So I started doing some research.”

Noah, who was closer to Remus than Jamie, swatted at him. “And you never shared? Rude,” he teased, though he was clearly exasperated. 

“Sorry.” Remus lifted his hand to his neck and rubbed at it. “Things, ah, happened… between us. And it… didn’t seem important after that.”

Oh, Jamie realized. Sirius using Remus and almost getting Severus killed. Yeah. That… had been a terrible year. Things still hadn’t exactly returned to normal, even now.

“You talking earlier. For some reason, it just made that pop back in my head.”

. 

“Harry,” Noah said, smiling down at his precious new baby, finally revealing his name choice to Jamie. They’d both decided to just pick their favorite names and decide which order they should go in after the baby was born. They didn’t do anything like pick a name for either a boy or girl. They just picked their favorites. Harry: a new name for a new member of their family.

Jamie squeezed his shoulder and looked down upon her child, unable to stop grinning. “James,” she revealed. 

Noah looked up at her, then smiled. A name of their past, which also served as a nod to Jamie’s parents. Both had semi-recently lost their parents (Noah’s hadn’t even seen their wedding), though Jamie more recently so and having a lot of trouble moving forward from it.

“Harry James,” Noah whispered.

“James Harry?” Jamie said, but she already knew.

“Harry James,” the new parents said in unison. Harry blinked. Their hearts absolutely melted in cuteness.

.

“Harry, please, go to sleep,” Jamie begged, rocking the babe for what seemed like hours now.

He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named had been rallying hard recently, especially against their little family and the poor Longbottom’s, now with a beautiful baby of their own. Just a couple weeks ago, Dumbledore himself had come to Jamie and Noah and insisted they and Harry were in grave danger and needed to hide. With Dumbledore and Sirius both pushing hard for them to hide and the desire to protect Harry overriding everything else, they’d agreed.

Harry was seemingly less than happy at the arrangement. Or maybe Jamie was projecting. 

She loved Noah with all her heart, and she didn’t even understand how her heart beat before Harry had been born, but being locked up inside their house without any of their friends and no news of the outside world was wearing on all of them.

.

Harry was cradled against Noah’s chest. For once, he was silent, as silent as the tears that rolled down Noah’s face. Jamie herself felt numb. She could be crying. She honestly didn’t know.

Moony looked like shit. Between even more scars thanks to Dumbledore’s work for him and the lack of sleep he’d gotten seemingly singlehandedly trying to organize Sirius’ trail, he was a complete wreck. Jamie’d never seen him look so bad, not even right after a full moon.

“Peter… Wormtail - he… betrayed us?” So much had happened so quickly. How could it have all gone down like this?

“Sirius put things together, realized Peter was going to betray you. Went after them. There was a big duel. Aurors are saying he’s dead, but… you know. Unregistered animagus. Sirius thinks - and I agree - that he’s in the wind.” Aurors had arrested him and tried sending him to jail as a Death Eater, but Remus and Dumbledore had apparently rallied hard last night, immediately after he was arrested, and at least managed to secure him a trial. Jamie hated to think what would have happened if He-Who-Had-Must-Not-Be-Named had gone after them instead of the Longbottom’s. Not just because that would mean their child had been murdered but because then Sirius would be the only one with the knowledge that Peter was the secret-keeper and he’d have no chance even with a trial. As it was, it was only thanks to Remus’ ingenious thought of letting them all communicate through objects charmed with the protean charm in case anything had gone bad that Jamie had known it was time to come out of hiding.

“Alice and Frank?” Noah’s voice cracked. Jamie had known Alice and talked with Frank a few times, but Alice and Noah had been really close, especially after what had happened with Severus.

Moony looked down and shook his head. “Dead,” he said, voice raspy and thin. “Killed protecting Neville.”

Noah shook his head and bent over Harry, kissing the top of his skull and dripping tears on his head.

“Neville?” Jamie asked. Remus had been slowly taking them through everything they’d missed since they’d gone in hiding. Jamie was exhausted and heartbroken. She didn’t want to ask but had to know.

“Scarred. But alive, somehow. I think Dumbledore said something about ancient magicks, but… I wasn’t really listening past Neville surviving and… and defeating Him.”

Jamie shook his head. Neville’s life as a miracle but a miracle she didn’t understand.

“Who-” Noah looked up again, “is he going to?” Jamie understood in that instant that Noah would volunteer them to adopt Neville if their family situation was like hers and Noah’s. And Jamie would absolutely go along with it.

“Grandmother, I believe.” Remus rubbed at his eyes and stifled a yawn.

“Here,” Jamie got up on instinct, her mother’s blood running through her veins. “When was the last time you slept? Borrow our bed. Trust me, we understand exhaustion. Get some sleep.”

Remus looked at Noah for confirmation, but he was done. He held Harry close and stared at the table. Jamie gently led her friend to bed. She had so many more questions, but then, didn’t they all?

.

“NOAH, NOOOAAAH!” Jamie screamed, too excited to control her volume, even though she knew it could scare Harry.

“What!?” Noah rushed into their living room, and Jamie felt bad for scaring him.

She danced, jumping from foot to foot, and pointed at Harry. “He’s walking; he’s walking!”

Indeed, on chubby legs, little Harry had pulled himself up on his legs and was toddling his fourth step towards his mum.

The worry immediately melted away from Noah’s face as he gracefully sank to his knees and held his arms out. Not to specifically reach for Harry, though that’s what it looked like. Feeling as though she was positively glowing, Jamie followed suit, bending down to the floor and holding her arms art. “That’s right, my little fawn, come to mommy!”

Giggles burst forth out of Harry as he sped up and fell into Jamie’s arms. Jamie laughed and picked him up, holding up towards the ceiling. “That was amazing, little fawn!”

Noah’s one arm snaked around Jamie’s waist as the other reached up to grab at Harry’s hand. He clutched Noah’s hand back, happily kicking his legs, glad to have made his parents happy.

“Sirius is going to kick himself for missing this!”

Noah kissed her cheek. “I bet winning that money from you and Remus will help him get over it, though.”

Jamie lowered Harry to her chest. “What?” she sputtered. “I don’t-”

Noah laughed and leaned towards Harry to kiss him on the cheek too. Harry clapped. “You think I don’t know when you bet on our son with your friends.” Noah shook his head and lightly slapped Jamie on the butt. “You should know me better than that by now, dear.”

Jamie laughed, relaxing. She kissed Harry’s forehead and was rewarded with more giggling and clapping. “Let’s see how far you can walk,” she said proudly, gently placing Harry back on the ground.

Noah returned to the other side of the room, lighting up. “Yes, that’s right. Can you walk all the way over here, Harry?”

.

Merlin, oh Merlin, it looked bad! “C’mere, Harry,” Noah said, heart pounding furiously. “Let me see.” His five year old son sobbed, big ol’ gator tears that, for once, Noah was frightened by. “Just let me see it, okay?”

“Ow, ow, oooow,” Harry cried, not lifting his hands from his knee, though even through the hands, Noah could see the blood.

“It’s okay, it’s okay,” Jamie said, coming to a rest behind Harry instead of hovering over Noah. “Oh, I’m so sorry, just let dad have a look, okay.”

“Noo, hurts!” Harry hiccuped. 

“Here,” Noah said. “Breathe with me, Harry. Look, breathe in… Okay, out. When you breathe out, take your hands off, okay? It’ll help it not hurt.”

Jamie combed her fingers through her kid’s thick, wild hair, as wild as her own. “And when you let go, you can hold my hand and squeeze it as hard as you want, okay?”

Harry nodded, already sniffling.

“Breathe in… Ready? And out…” Noah gently lifted Harry’s hands from his knee. Jamie reached in, taking Harry’s small hands in her own. He immediately started squeezing tight, sucking in a breath of air through a wavering lip. Jamie kissed the top of his head.

Noah’s eyes crinkled and tightened. Nearly immediately after, Harry’s grip relaxed and he dropped Jamie’s hand to pull at his knee, eyes wide in amazement. Noah’s expression relaxed. “See, all better, right?”

“Mommy!” Harry said, already forgetting he was supposed to be appearing pathetic. With another wordless spell, Noah cleaned their son up, taking the blood of his - and Jamie’s - hands as well. After another moment’s inspection, Harry grew bored and stood up by putting his hands on the ground, sticking his butt in the air, and then straightening up. Jamie laughed.

Harry ran back to the toy broom he’d fallen off of only moments later. The floating spell had deactivated as soon as Harry had rolled off, and it started up again as Harry put his hand over it and the broom jumped into his hand. “Again, again! I wanna ride more!” He bounced on his feet, looking expectantly at Noah and Jamie, trying to decide who’d be most likely to let him back on the broom.

Noah shook his head but didn’t dissent. With a whoop, Jamie leaped up and went to help Harry back on the broom, though she did flick the hover down lower so if Harry fell again, it wouldn’t be from so high. When it was clear Harry had his balance back, Jamie went to stand by Noah. She gave her a friendly elbow. “Did you see that? He’s a natural,” she grinned.

“You mean he doesn’t know when to quit,” Noah deadpanned, but Jamie knew she wasn’t angry.

.

Of course they’d brought Harry to Diagon Alley before, but there was something special about bringing your kid to Diagon Alley to go shopping for their first year of school.

They’d gotten Harry’s robes, books, and wand (holly with dragon core, slightly springy). They’d run into Hagrid at Madam Malkin’s and had a friendly reunion, introducing Harry to the groundskeeper. The two had immediately hit it off. Hagrid, unfortunately, couldn’t spend much time chatting, as he’d gotten Dumbledore to convince Augusta Longbottom to let him pick up Neville’s supplies. Apparently Augusta didn’t let the boy out much in order to avoid all the attention he would draw. Hagrid promised Harry they’d see each other again soon, though, and hustled off to his next stop. 

The three of them were currently at Eeylops Owl Emporium waiting for Harry to pick out an owl before they finished up by celebrating at Florean’s, where Remus and Sirius were waiting for them. Usually so decisive and quick to form an opinion, this was the longest either Noah or Jamie could remember him putting hard thought into something. (Then again, he was 11, so that was allowed.) They’d started at Magical Menagerie, where Harry had spent most his time eyeing the various snakes. When they’d realized Harry was likely to go for one of them instead of an owl, as they’d intended, they’d gently pushed him towards Eeylops, saying they should be sure to get a good look around everywhere they could.

Harry had lingered for a while over a large, snowy owl, who’d hooted softly and nipped at him. He’d also spent some time with a young burrowing owl who seemed playful, almost playing a game of hide-and-seek with Harry, who’d laughed and poked a finger in the cage and had to be reminded that wasn’t okay here.

“He’s taking this rather seriously, isn’t he?” the amused clerk commented.

Noah grinned, and Jamie nodded, happy to make some smalltalk as she continued to watch Harry. So far, nothing seemed to have piqued his interest as much as the snakes. Jamie whispered as such to the clerk, trying not to be overheard by Harry who, she and Noah hoped might forget if he stared at the owls for long enough. The clerk coughed to cover up their laughter, then addressed Harry.

“You know, Harry, it can help to talk to them. Just introduce yourself. See which of them speak to you.”

In true, confident 11-year-old fashion, Harry waved her off with a hand. “Owls don’t talk like us.”

Noah pinched the top of his nose with his fingers. The clerk simply smiled. “No, they can’t speak to us like humans speak to each other. But if you take good care of your pet, it can become your familiar. That means forming a bond with it. Your familiar can understand you when no one else does, and you may find that you understand your familiar more than just as a pet. To be able to do that, though, you need to know that you can have good communication. If you say hi to one of these owls, and you don’t feel like it’s listening, then it may not be the pet or familiar for you. But if you feel like it could understand you, that’s a good sign.” The clerk’s eye twinkled.

Harry stared at the clerk, head tilted to the side, deep in thought. He looked over at Jamie, who nodded and smiled encouragingly. Finally, he looked at Noah, who had that serious look on his face that Harry knew meant something was somehow important to his dad. That broke it. Harry smiled and started babbling away to the owls. 

“Hi, owl! Hi, owl! Hi, owl!” he went around waving at several owls. “We have a cat, you know. Dad says owls and cats don’t always get along together. Do any of you feel brave enough to face our cat? I want someone who will be friends with my cat, can you do that?” Harry wandered through the cages, taking the clerk’s words to heart.

Noah looked over at the clerk, raising an eyebrow in question. The clerk winked. “Just wait,” she said. “Any minute now.”

When they looked back, Harry was standing in front of the cage of a gorgeous barred owl without a nameplate. “This one!” he said brightly, turning to them all. Jamie was sure her grin matched the one on Noah’s face. No snake for them today. That was good. To be honest, Jamie was the tiniest bit frightened of snakes. She was pretty sure Noah’s worries were more along the lines of feeding the thing, since snakes weren’t allowed at Hogwarts as pets.

An owl heavier, they finally headed off to Florean’s. All Harry’s supplies, except his wand, which Jamie made room for in her own wand holster, were stuffed in a bottomless bag, which they had Harry carrying across his back. Noah held the owl’s cage, promptly named Owlbert (which Jamie loved and knew Sirius and even Remus would get a kick out of, too), in one hand and Jamie’s hand in the other. Harry walked - nearly skipped - in front of them, leading the way.

Jamie squeezed Noah’s hand. “Calla’s pretty old. Think she’ll survive the shock of us bringing an owl into the house.”

“Don’t even joke. This owl better prepare itself.”

Jamie laughed and felt Noah’s thumb rub over the back of her hand. Noah loved that cat. Jamie wasn’t sure if they’d ever be able to get another cat again if Calla died.

.

“Aww,” Jamie said, leaning her head to rest on Noah’s shoulder as they read Harry’s letter together. “His first crush!”

“Maybe.” Harry’s own description was confused on how he was feeling. “Did we prepare him well enough?” Noah worried.

Jamie laughed. “For what?”

“I don’t know…” Noah lifted a hand to twirl it in the air a few times. “To understand how he’s feeling. I know it was a long time ago, Jamie, but do you remember how confused and lost you felt before you knew bi was a thing? Heck before you knew about demisexuality?”

Jamie immediately quieted. Honestly, she hadn’t remembered. It had been a long time. Were they really that old?

“Coming in!” Sirius bellowed from the fireplace, already inside. Jamie laughed, thankful for her friend breaking the awkward silence.

“In here!” Jamie shouted.

Two sets of footprints announced that Remus was with Sirius a moment before they entered the kitchen. “Wazzat?”

“Letter from Harry,” Noah said, handing it over. Harry loved and trusted his Uncles. They were basically extra parents to him. He knew and expected that all letters home would go to Moony and Padfoot, too - often left them special messages in his letters.

“Aww,” Remus smiled.

“His first crush,” Sirius finished. “How exciting. Third year, though. Does that seem sorta late to any of you?”

Noah shrugged. “Not to me.”

They all stared at the letter. Then Jamie laughed and clapped Noah on the back. “He might take after you, then, No’!”

Noah smiled and looked down, but Jamie saw the worry roiling underneath. She knew they’d spend the rest of the day crafting a letter back to Harry. None of them minded, though. Harry was pretty much the center of all their worlds. And with all the trouble he got into at school, this was a mild problem in comparison. One they could actually help solve.

When they’d finished crafting, they put their heads together and worked on modifying a howler to calmly and lovingly give their messages to Harry. He deserved to at least be able to hear their voices for this, if they couldn’t be there to answer his questions in person.

.

This was worse than the first time. The first time, they were scared for Harry, but they could fight for him. He was theirs to protect and look over. This time, Harry was nearly as old as they had been and facing He-Who-Had-Must-Not-Be-Named’s presence at Hogwarts since first year. He was old enough to make a choice, and he had. Right after they’d all returned from the mess of Bill Weasley and Fleur Delacour’s wedding. Although Ron and Harry were schoolmates and pals, Harry wasn’t a close enough friend of Ron’s to warrant an invite to his brother’s wedding. All Order members had basically become family of Molly and Arthur Weasley’s, though. The attack had come after the ceremony. Neville (who was closer with Ron than Harry), Ron, Hermione, Ginny, and Luna had all disappeared as the attack started.

A terrified and ferocious Jamie and Noah had found an ashen-faced Harry sandwiched between Remus and Sirius, wand still held out in defense. They’d rushed to Harry’s side, checking for injuries. Remus quietly told them that Harry had done great, been holding his own before Remus and Sirius made it over to him. When they’d finally gotten him to talk, he’d only whispered, “Ginny”. Turns out, their son had been flirting with the youngest Weasley for the past year, and they’d been secretly toying with the idea of a relationship. Harry had seen it when her group had disapparated (or, more likely, Hermione apparated them all away - genius recognizes genius and the Marauders and Noah continued to be stunned by Harry’s stories of her successes, even secondhand told).

Even though returning to Hogwarts meant going to school under a Death Eater, Harry had stood proudly before the four of them and declared, “I don’t care. I’m going back. Other students won’t have a choice. Me and the others, we have to be there for them.”

Jamie steeled her heart and didn’t let her face react. She was sure Noah’s, Sirius’, and Remus’ were much the same. Proud and steely. Worried. Wishing they hadn’t raised such an independent, compassionate Gryffindor. Noah nodded, but it was Jamie who stood and wrapped Harry in a hug. “You give ‘em hell from the inside. Your dad and uncles and I will give them hell from out here.”

Harry gave a half-laugh, half-sigh. Slowly, Noah, Remus, and Sirius stood to join them. Sirius ruffled Harry’s hair. “Always stand up for yourself, Harry.”

It was Noah’s plea that broke the dam, though. “Come back to us, Harry.” His voice broke as he said it.

The night that they sent Harry back off to Hogwarts, the station full of tight-lipped, crying, gray-faced families, Noah and Jamie laid in bed, limbs completely entangled and periodically crying. They didn’t sleep a wink. They rose to Sirius lying awake on the couch and Remus starting coffee for them all. The house was oddly silent. Noah and Jamie, and likely Remus and Sirius as well, felt more resolved and determined than ever. It was time to finally see the end of this damn war.

.

The Battle of Hogwarts, like all battles, had its downtimes, in which time moved too slowly and things were too clear. During the action periods, everything moved too fast, but at least there was no time to wonder or see who all had died. Jamie and Noah had managed to stick by each other’s side, but they hadn’t seen Harry since the Order initially confronted Headmaster Severus. Sometime after that, Remus and Sirius had been assigned to protect different sides of the castle as them, as well.

When they knew Neville was marching off to the forest to die for them all, they did find Augusta and do what they could to be with her. She’d screamed, a harsh, broken sound, then broken down in tears that she staunchly ignored as she paced back and forth.

It wasn’t until the Battle was over and bodies were being dragged into the Great Hall that Jamie and Noah saw any of their family again. “Merlin, no,” Jamie had whispered, spotting him first, and dashed in between students and families and staff alike. Noah saw what she was headed to a second later and broke into a run after her.

Kingsley Shacklebolt and Minerva McGonagall were carrying an all too familiar body. Minerva caught sight of Jamie and Noah headed toward’s them. Her stony expression fell for an instant, and she said something to Kingsley. They changed course and laid Remus Lupin on the ground.

“No, no, no, no, no,” Jamie was saying as she skidded to a stop, kneeling before Remus’ body. Her hands ran over his face, his neck, his wrist, trying to somehow pass some of her life into him. Noah hovered over his wife, the fear clear on his face. Minerva put a hand on Noah’s shoulder, then Jamie’s, then left them. The tears had come, and Jamie couldn’t stop them. Noah looked frantically around him. Please, please don’t have let them all died.

From across the hall, Noah spotted Sirius’ iconic hair. Almost in slow motion, Sirius turned and made eye contact with Noah. He shook his head, at first unable to move, then walked stiffly towards them, as if forcing himself to come and see who had died. When he was close enough to ID Remus, he roared and fell to his knees where he was, still several feet away. The Hall was a place of grief and mourning for the moment. His roar of heartbreak had hardly been the first and no one bothered looking at him or telling him to shush. Unmoving, unable to join Jamie or Noah over one of his best pals, he looked up to Noah. “Harry,” he mouthed. A question. An order. Noah didn’t know, but he couldn’t look at Remus any longer. Hoping that Jamie would understand his plan, he turned and walked out of the hall. He had to find his child. He had to find Harry.

They all should have helped move and recover bodies, but none of them could. Noah walked past the Weasley’s, bent over the body of one of theirs, past Augusta practically smothering Neville as Luna, smothered by her own father, seemed to be working to get them both a little air. He walked past bodies of children who looked too young to have been allowed to stay and fight. He walked past the bodies of elves, only being grieved by other elves for the moment. He walked past groups of people working to move chunks of stone and make sure no one was underneath.

Noah walked what seemed the whole of Hogwarts, barely taking stock of its immense damage, unable to process all the death he passed. Finally, he stopped and turned to the portraits. Most in this hall were empty - many characters were running around the castle pointing out where they thought they’d seen bodies get buried, while others were simply visiting friends, mourning just the same as everyone else. An old wizard with a long, gray beard and a blue hat and a young woman in a pale, yellow dress were present, though.

“My son,” he tried, “my son, Harry Potter. Do you know him? Have you seen him?” The woman sadly shook her head no. Noah could no longer take it. He made his way back to the Great Hall, hoping Harry, still alive, would have made his way back there by now.

Noah passed Minerva on his way back into the Hall. She grabbed his arm. “Your son needs you,” she said, pointing him roughly outside the castle’s entrance. Noah didn’t bother to ask for details, simply rushed out of castle, desperate to see Harry alive.

There he was. Brown skin, black hair, taller than Noah by a couple inches now, breathing hard and staring up at the sky. Noah didn’t break stride. “Harry!” he called. Harry, face ashy and dirty and covered in blood and all tear-streaked, turned towards him. “Harry,” he said, enveloping his child in his arms. Alive. Harry was alive. Noah breathed in his scent, one head firmly on his back and the other over the back of his head as Harry fiercely returned his hug, bent down to fold into his dad.

“Uncle Moony is dead,” Harry said, voice muffled.

“I know, little fawn,” Noah said, “I know.” 

When Harry was able to straighten again, Noah asked if he’d been seen by his mom or Sirius. When he said no, Noah managed to convince him to come inside. Bringing his son to the body of his dead uncle felt like torture, but Jamie and Sirius needed to know Harry was alive, and Harry needed to hug them just as much as he’d needed to hug Noah.

.

“Any idea what Harry’s news is?” Sirius asked, in lieu of saying hello.

Noah shook his head. “Come on in, Sirius,” he teased. Harry was now 23. At this age, calling a meeting to talk to his parents couldn’t be that many things. Maybe he was sick with a serious illness or was announcing a surprise engagement to a secret partner or even was here to tell Jamie and Noah and Sirius they were too old to be living by themselves anymore. Though only 44, Noah felt much older than that. Had ever since the end of the war five years ago. Political and social recovery and improvement was a long, slow road.

“I’m betting he lost his temper, lost his job, and wants to move back in with us!” Jamie yelled from the living room.

“Jamie!” Noah admonished. 

Sirius laughed and stepped inside. “Yeah, have some faith in your kid, Leaps! I bet it’s a promotion.”

Noah rolled his eyes as he followed Sirius into the living room. Sirius and Jamie had long since stopped hiding their betting over Harry from Noah. “You’re just saying that because Jamie’s had to do with Harry’s job.”

Sirius shrugged. “So what do you think, then, if you’re so smart?”

Noah shrugged back. “I think Harry has a right to reveal what he wants to talk about himself.”

“No fun,” Jamie teased, sticking her tongue out.

“What’s no fun?” Harry’s head asked, appearing in the fireplace.

“You!” Jamie teased again. “Get in here, already.”

Harry’s laughter was cut short as his head pulled away and he appeared in a flash of green a moment later.

“Ten galleons,” Sirius whispered to Jamie, and they shook hands.

Harry rolled his bright green eyes, looking startlingly like Noah in that moment.

“So what’s the news, kiddo?” Jamie asked. Noah joined her and Sirius on the couch, giving Harry the stage.

He took a deep breath. “Well, mum, dad. I’m… like you. I finally figured out why I’ve felt… different all these years. I’m agender. I don’t really identify with any gender. I feel more like I… don’t have one. I’m also grayromantic. My romantic attraction is both really low and fluctuates. And… I think I might also be bi, but I’m not really positive yet.”

“Oh, Harry!” Jamie jumped up to hug him, planting a big kiss on his cheek as well.

“That’s not quite all. I, well, I kinda like being called your son, and I like the name Harry, but I want to start using they, them pronouns instead of he, him.”

“Of course, Harry!” Noah beamed, coming in to hug Jamie and Harry together.

“Proud of you, squirt,” Sirius said, coming in to hug Noah, Jamie, and Harry all together. “You know, we all know how hard coming out can be.”

“And how hard figuring out how you feel is,” Noah added.

“You know you’re my favorite kid, yeah?” Jamie asked.

Harry laughed, squirming out of the group hug. “Yeah, yeah,” they said. “So did you make lunch? I’m starving?”

Noah laughed as Jamie playfully shook their shoulder. “That’s my son!” she said. “Knows what’s most important. Of course we made lunch.”

Sirius’ stomach growled.

“Sometimes I think you all only show up here for the food,” Noah sniffed. Sirius grinned and threw an arm over his shoulder.

“Nah, the food’s just a bonus. I enjoy the company most of all.”

“Me too,” Harry said as Jamie copied Sirius and threw her arm over Harry’s shoulder.

“Well, I am just here for the food,” she said. “I can’t believe it took you two decades to figure it out.”

They all laughed. Jamie and Noah shared cooking duties, of course. Noah stuck an arm out behind him. Jamie and Harry both grabbed it and gave it a good squeeze.

“Thanks for being so chill about me being agender,” Harry said once they’d all sat down with full plates, “and grayro and possibly bi. Seamus and Dean finally got engaged and told their families. Dean’s family took it pretty well, if a bit stiffly, but I guess there was some name calling in the Finnigan household.”

Sirius, who was sitting closest to Harry, reached over to put a supportive hand on their shoulder. “We’d never treat you like that, our little fawn all grown up.”

“Never,” Noah and Jamie echoed. And they all meant it.

~Hufflepuff Mod

#lily potter #james potter #harry potter #aro headcanons #ace headcanons #aro spectrum #ace spectrum #gray aromantic #demiromantic #demisexual #pansexual #biromantic #pan headcanons #bi headcanons #trans headcanons #trans boy #trans girl #platonic relationships #familial relationships #characters #aroacehp #hufflepuff mod #anonymous #long post #remus lupin #sirius black #gay #gay headcanons #agender #neville longbottom

[surrogateself]

Star Wars The Last Jedi: How Movie Magic Dies

0.5 out 4 stars

This is a bad movie. There are barely any redeeming qualities, and it manages to take a huge dump on everything that came before it and everything that will come after it. If the first movie was about a “new hope”, then The Last Jedi is about “no hope at all”. And I say this not just as a fan of Star Wars, but as a fan of cinema in general, including the previous films from director Rian Johnson. Make no mistake, I am not alone on this, many feel the same way about this movie, but for the sake of this piece I will write solely on how this movie affected me personally, and to do that we have to go back to the beginning.

It was the fall of 1986 or maybe it was 1987, I don’t quite remember, but I think I was 7 years old. At this point I had a pretty good idea of what movies were, I had already seen both E.T. and Back to the Future. This time, however, the local tv network was announcing a Star Wars television event, all three original films were going to play continuously starting on a Sunday afternoon. The movies I’ve been hearing about from older people were going to be accessible to me. My cousin, who is 5 years older had a really cool collection of Star Wars toys, the original ones created by Kenner. I loved playing with them.

Watching the original trilogy at the age of 7 has become one of those memories that has never faded. I can’t tell you exactly how I felt in each particular scene, but I do remember where I was and I remember acting out some of the scenes between commercial breaks. Now, stop and think about that for a second. For a 7-year-old boy to be that engaged and excited it's almost magical. This is why Star Wars has transcended cinema and has become an iconic piece of pop culture. And at the center of this phenomenon stands one of the greatest hero archetypes ever created, Luke Skywalker.

SPOILERS AHEAD

Fast forward to 2017, and Luke Skywalker has been replaced by a weird parody version of himself. He’s an old hermit, who’s constantly angry, doesn’t give a fuck about the force, doesn’t give a fuck about his friends or family, and above all, is a complete coward. What happened? How did it come to this? Well, rather than dive into the complexity of these questions, writer/director Rian Johnson creates a half-baked excuse for his exile and concludes that he simply left everything to go die in some planet that contains the oldest Jedi temple. And thus we are exposed to this mess of a film.

But this isn’t how the movie opens, even though The Force Awakens ended in that very epic shot of Luke receiving his father’s lightsaber. The movie opens with some crap jokes and a battle in space that doesn’t really make a lot of sense, the ships are slow and they drop bombs in space…WTF? Ok, I get it, this is Star Wars and its meant to be fantasy, so let's have bombs that drop with no gravity and a remote detonator that also falls in space when the ship’s hatch is open. I accepted it, even the slow motion was welcomed. The problem is that literally 10 minutes later they blow the bridge of general Leia’s ship and she’s floating in space. So which one is it?… how does space work here?

I could end my review right there because everything that follows is these weird random moments that contradict or neglects what was said or happened a few scenes before. I’ll try to continue. So, after the space battle the rebels jump to light speed and vanish, but 5 minutes later the first order arrives and begins an assault that has Kylo Ren considering if he should kill his mom, and thus we get the scene I described before, followed by some force voodoo shit that Leia pulls off. Yes, we know the force is strong in her family but again, they never alluded to this kind of ability in any of the other films. So Leia is literally a god who cannot die in space, don’t question it, its meant to be meta… bro.

The rebels are stuck in this poor excuse for a plot, they have enough fuel for one jump but they can’t because they'll be tracked, so for the next few hours/days (there’s really no sense of time in this movie) they’ll fly with the big bad ship chasing them. Even though a few scenes before, the first order unleashed an assault that almost killed them, why isn’t the first order keep doing this until they’re wiped out? Well… maybe because they’re a bunch of morons, for example, General Hux is portrayed like a buffoon in this movie, while in the force awakens he was menacing and almost had this Nazi behavior about him. But in The Last Jedi, he’s become a character from Space Balls and that only ruins the movie because he ceases to be a threat.

After Finn wakes up from his coma, in what looks like a giant leaking condom, he notices the situation that they’re in, and rather than join the fight, he once again decides to make a run for it. However, his character arc already demonstrated that in the previous movie, he was a trooper than ran because he was scared but developed courage to go up against Kylo Ren and The First Order. Now he’s reverted back to being a coward?… I don’t know why they did this, perhaps it was to build the scene where he meets Rose Tico or what has become the most pointless character in cinema. The entire scene when she meets Finn is awkward and written horribly. But she’s there and she knows what’s causing the first order to track them and suddenly Finn knows too. Then, they communicate this to Poe who then decides to call Maz Kanata, and she tells them to go to the nearby planet where they’ll find a codebreaker that will help them infiltrate the enemy ship to deactivate the light speed tracker. FUCK… I’m pretty sure that’s a run on sentence. This movie is so frustrating that writing a review for it is painful, and that’s how watching the movie feels. I won’t get into this part of the movie because it really doesn’t amount to anything.

So... Luke Skywalker, lol. While all this non-sense with Finn and Rose is happening we get cuts back and forth between Rey and Luke on the island. There’s no training but rather 1 and a half lesson that Rey gets from Luke. She then begins to telepathically connect with Kylo via the force, so at this point, I’m thinking they’re siblings since Luke and Leia did that in Empire, but I’m not sure that’s the case. To be frank, at this point I don’t care. We are now two movies into a new trilogy that follows another trilogy where the heroes won and defeated evil. Yet we have no information about how the first order started or where Snoke appeared from. And to give Luke “fucking” Skywalker this role is just a fuck you to everyone that has enjoyed these films. The man barely knew anything about his evil father and he was ready to die to save him. He gets a quick glimpse of his nephew’s dark side and has a thought of killing him??? Sorry, I don’t buy it. That’s not Luke and even if it was, the reasons for his exile would have to be much more dramatic than that.

This decision in the writing is bad, just as bad as giving Batman a gun or making Harry Potter a rapist. It simply doesn’t make sense with the behavior of the character. Mark Hamill said it himself, and a good director should’ve listened. As for Snoke getting killed and the matter of Rey’s parents, sure it was a wasted opportunity and no, it wasn’t mind-blowing. I wasn’t one of those people that started to theorize, I just wanted a solid movie. Also, to all those defenders out there that are claiming that this movie was feminist and it was about women power, you’re all wrong. Let me break it down for you, Leia, Holdo, and Rose were all written in such a forced matter that you can feel their propaganda behind their actions. Yes, its good to be feminist, but do it with respect, make it part of an engaging story. For example Rey, during the Force Awakens, she was introduced as an independent strong young woman, who happens to fall into this larger than life adventure. But in the Last Jedi she was written off as the girl from Twilight, suddenly she has to help the boy, and suddenly she finds him attractive because of his nipples. I’m sorry but this is the opposite direction of feminism.

The Last Jedi is the mutant child of Empire and Return of the Jedi. Nothing in this movie works, even at its very last few minutes when I said to myself “if they pull off a great battle between Kylo and Luke I may forgive everything that happened before”. But that was once again a let down, Luke pulls off some Matrix moves and its revealed that he is actually not there but still stuck on the island from Lost, then he looks at the two suns on the horizon, much like in A New Hope and then he vanishes, I guess becoming one with the Force. The scene felt rushed and out of place; I wonder if Mark Hamill even knew that it was going to go down this way. But fuck it, that’s it for me. The last Star Wars movie I watched was Revenge of the Sith. For all the shit the prequels get, I still enjoy watching them, sure they’re flawed, but never to the degree of this garbage. If you had asked me back in November I would have said The Force Awakens is the last Star Wars movie I watched. But The Last Jedi is so bad that it ruined the movie that came before it.

#Star Wars #The Last Jedi #Movie #Review