#thinking of maybe posting this chapter by chapter

[not-neverland06]

How About a Nuke?

Part VIII / Part IX

(Completed) Series Masterlist

Cooper Howard x fem!reader, The ghoul x fem!reader A/N: PLEASE READ, we have reached the end of their journey and I am so sad/happy/excited about it. I don’t even know how to feel honestly. I just want to thank everyone who has commented, messaged or reblogged this story. Your kind words and funny little depressed memes have been really uplifting for me. I was actually considering just giving up on this blog when I posted the first chapter. I haven’t had much inspiration lately or interaction I feel like, and you all have helped reignite that spark within me. Summary: There’s something keeping you tied to Cooper Howard, an invisible string wrapped around you both. You’ve fought against it as long as you could but he’s not gonna let you fight for much longer.

It’s been a month and the bounty on her head gets bigger everyday. Normally the compound hires privately, they don’t like going through the agencies. He figures with Sylvie dead they’re struggling to find a new leader and they’re falling apart. Or they’re just desperate for her head on a stick. 

He sees her face everywhere, crudely drawn images of her varying in their accuracy. In some she has a hat like his on, in others her nose is the wrong shape, or her eyes are all wrong. No one seems to have a good grasp on who she is. Out of curiosity and a strange need to know she’s still alive, he’s asked around. 

There are different rumors as to where she’s hiding out. Some think she’s taken to hiding out in the caves near Filly. Anyone with half a brain knows that the area’s overrun by irradiated bears and other mutated freaks. 

There are those that say they’ve seen her wandering through the sands. Following that lead had led him nowhere. He doesn’t know where she is and it’s driving him insane. She’s like a constant itch in the back of his mind that he just can’t scratch. Days and nights are spent thinking about her and he hates it. 

He’s not sure what he’d do when he does find her. Whether he’d shoot her to repay the favor or just tie her up to keep her from leaving again. He’s conflicted on how he feels about her. He’s bothered that he feels anything towards her at all. And he knows that when she shot him, she was shooting to kill. 

She had no way of knowing that he would heal from that bullet. She’d watched him bleed out on the ground and left him for dead. He was impressed, as much as he wanted to be mad, he was almost proud in a way. 

Throughout their tumultuous lives and times together she’d always had to be guided by him. He’d shown her the ways of whatever world they were living in. She’d relied on him and he enjoyed it. The time had to come when eventually she wouldn’t need him anymore. 

It’s outside of Filly that he finds the most accurate poster of her so far. She looks like she did in their first movie together. A proper outlaw, wanted all across the Wastelands for her crimes against a bunch of sick fucks. If he could kill Sylvie again, he would. He’d kill all of them. 

Not that he’s condemning them because of what the compound’s doing. He’s dabbled in organ trade before, eaten people, he’s done a lot of fucked up shit. But he draws the line at trying to hurt her. He’s the only one who should be allowed to fuck with her.

He takes the poster down and whistles softly at the price under her name. It’s enough to keep him happy for a longtime. If he never wanted to take on another bounty he wouldn’t have to. Course, he was never in this for the money. A man’s gotta have something to entertain himself with at the end of the world. 

He wonders if she’s even still alive. Maybe a Deathclaw got her a day after she left him behind. He could have walked past her corpse and never even known it. He folds the poster up and slips it in his bag. He doesn’t know why he bothers keeping it. Possibly because it’s the closest thing to her that he’s got, but he doesn’t feel like lingering on that thought for long. 

He tugs his hat lower on his head and heads through the tunnel leading to Filly. He’s caused a lot of issues here over the years. Usually he kills most of the people who could identify him as an instigator, but he doesn’t feel like pushing his luck today. He needs more supplies and he knows Ma June won’t sell to him if he causes a fight beforehand. 

It’s louder than normal today, more people rushing around. They’re all congregating around something in the center of the marketplace. He turns to the left, heading up the stairs to try and get a better look at what’s got everyone so excited. 

“They found her!” A boy shouts, fidgeting in his spot next to him. He glances at him from under his hat and the boy pales before scurrying away from him. His lips turn up in a cruel grin and he finally gets a good look at what’s happening. 

She’s kneeling in the middle of the marketplace, two Knights on either side of her. He’s more surprised by the fact that she actually has picked up a hat in her time away from him. 

She seems to be playing into the outlaw routine more than he thought she would. 

You’re embarrassed, honestly, that you let these two idiots capture you. Them and their useless little squires. 

You’ve found odd jobs through the Brotherhood when they need assistance looking for relics of the old world. Though, you’re really not sure how much use a toaster oven can be to them, but they pay good money for it. 

Once your bounty was posted and they figured out who you were, though, that stopped being useful. You can’t even hunt bounties because the agencies would just grab you and turn you over to the compound.

They clearly didn’t give a shit about women, you don’t get why they’re making this whole Sylvie situation such a big deal. 

You had to bribe Ma June by buying some of her junk, but eventually she’d helped you find some work in Filly. The people here are stupid enough that they don’t recognize you when they see you. Most of them are high or drunk so the only thing you have to worry about is wandering hands and not stepping in the middle of their brawls. 

From the patrons of the bar you hear stories about yourself. How you slaughtered the entire compound, even the children, which is so far from the truth you can’t help but scoff. Or how you apparently slept with a ghoul and you're carrying his mutant baby. 

You don’t even know where they got that one from. 

They also seem to think you wander through the sands, shooting anyone who gets in your way. It’s a comfort that no one seems to have caught onto you yet. But it’s also disheartening to know that all that’s left of civilization is a bunch of psychopathic idiots. 

What happened to natural selection?

You know your stint in Filly is up when two Knights walk in, their squires struggling to carry their bags behind them. You pull your hat further over your head and duck behind the bar. You try to keep your back to them and let the old man, Marley, who runs the bar deal with them. 

His shaky voice is cautious as he greets them, “What are Knights doing so far out here?”

One of their distorted voices rings out through the, now quiet, bar. “We got bored. Wanted to shoot some shit.”

You roll your eyes and focus on cleaning the cup in front of you. You spit into it, not enough water to properly clean it, and scrub at it with a stained towel. Marley hums, clearly displeased with the answer. You can hear his tottering steps approaching you and wince, praying he’s not going to do what you think he is. 

He tugs on your shirt with a shaky hand and you slump forward in defeat. “Deal with these jackasses,” he mutters, taking drinks over to a different table. 

You pour the only alcohol the bar has into two cups and keep your head down as you approach. “Heard that a woman took over for Knight Damien.”

One of them scoffs and shakes his armored head, “What the fuck is this world coming to?” You don’t know how they’re planning on drinking their liquor with the helmets on but you’re not going to ask stupid questions. You drop the cups in front of them, but your hand slips and one of them tips over into a Knight’s lap. 

“I’ve got it, sire.” Their squire lunges forward and begins vigorously scrubbing their armor. Your face curls up in distaste and you’re about to walk away when a metal hand grips your wrist. 

“Holy shit, it’s her!” Oh, you’re so screwed. 

They’ve got a fucking leash on you, it’s humiliating. The scarred and dirt-covered faces of the citizens of Filly surround you. They’re all leering, shouting at you and begging the Knight’s to share in the bounty. But the Knight’s aren’t listening, they’re just congratulating each other. 

“What do you think they’ll give us?”

One of them shoves their squire and he goes toppling into his large bag, feet flailing in the air. “Hopefully better fucking squires. I’m getting sick of this one’s stupid face.” 

The squire kneels down and shouts in a shaking voice, “I’m sorry if I’ve disappointed you, sire!” God, you really hate these people. You wished they would just shoot you. Having to sit here and listen to them talk was making your brain go numb. 

The Knight’s distorted laugh rings out through his helmet. The other one glances over at you, “What do you think she did? I’ve never seen the compound this pissed off.”

“I dunno. Hey!” You know he’s talking to you, that they want an answer, you really don’t care to give them one. “What’d you do?” They stare at you for a moment and then he sighs when you don’t respond. He shoves his squire towards you and the kid goes stumbling over his feet. “Make her talk.”

He nods rapidly, head bobbing up and down. “Of course, sire.” Your hands twitch to your side and you give him a wicked grin as he approaches. 

He’s debating going down there and trying to help her when the first shot goes off. He doesn’t even see it happen, he just watches as one of the squires drops to the ground. 

Those who don’t want to get caught in the crossfire are quick to move away from the area, hiding in their shops or shoving past him to get through the tunnel. He heads down the stairs, taking his time and trying to figure out where the shot came from. 

The second squire moves towards her and his head flies back, a hole between his eyes and his brains splattering across the ground. One Knight shoves the other one and points at their dead squire’s, “Did you not take her fucking gun?”

He’s been in those suits. He remembers how it felt, the power you get from being in them. How they make you feel like a big man. He also remembers how fucking slow they could be. She’s on her feet and running for cover before they can even start to grab her. 

She dives behind a stall and tugs a knife out of her boot, sawing at the ropes around her wrists. He can’t reach her before the fighting starts. Someone in the remaining crowd shouts, “Grab her! Get the bounty!” And all hell breaks loose. 

Someone runs at him and he shoots them before they can grab him. Shots start going off, the Knight’s mowing down anyone who tries to swoop in on their bounty. Everyone else is shooting blindly, just trying to get rid of the competition so they can claim her bounty as their own. 

He ducks under the hail fire and slides next to her as she’s reloading her gun. She glances over at him and frowns, “Didn’t I kill you?”

He hears a shout and watches as some half-feral woman charges at them. She shoots her dead and turns back to him. He gives her a wry smile, “You want to do this now, sweetheart?”

She peers over her cover and surveys the chaos going on around them. She sighs and glances back at him, “Why aren’t you dead?” 

He tugs one of his specially made bullets out of his bag and loads it into his gun. He lifts himself to his knees and aims at the weak spot on the Knight’s chest plate. They both watch as blood explodes out of the neck of the power armor, the Knight’s friend cussing as he watches him die. 

“Next time,” she turns to look at him, “aim for the head,” he instructs. She glares at him before making her way to Ma June’s shop. He follows, not willing to let her out of his sight again, and she ducks behind the barrels of supplies in front of the shop. 

“Clearly,” she winces as the Knight’s gun starts firing off again, “I’m not making it out of here on my own.” They dive to the side as bullets rip through the barrels they’re leaning against. They’re not gonna have cover for much longer.

He grins at her, “Sounds like you’re asking me for a favor, darling.”

The sounds of screams and bodies dropping is nearly deafening. A few feet away a bullet catches a man in the throat and he drops to the ground. They watch as he chokes on his blood and tries to claw his way to safety. Steps rapidly approach them and she turns to shoot a different man, his body dropping an inch away from them. 

He turns back to her and his lips turn down, “After you tried to kill me? You want my help,” he laughs at her and she glares. 

Before she can speak a voice rings out above them, “I got her!” He shoots at the woman on the upper level above them, half of her leg gets blown off and she tumbles over the railing, narrowly missing the pair. 

He turns back to her, “You’re asking a lot, darling.”

“You’ve fucking shot me, twice. I’m not asking you for anything.” Her lips turn down in a sneer and she looks at him like the very sight of him disgusts her. “I don't need your help. I don't need you.” She glances back over her shoulder, surveying the gore and the bullets flying around them. She checks her gun and he sees just how little ammo she has left. “I’ll handle this myself.” She snaps the chamber of her gun closed and moves to get up. He grabs her wrist and yanks her back down, ignoring the angry expression on her face. 

“Look, you might not want my help, but you need it, sweetheart. Just stay here.” 

You watch as Cooper runs off, his guns firing before he’s even fully standing. You only wait a second before you’re running into Ma June’s and out her back door. She shouts at you as you barrel through her shop, knocking over her displays and shelves, but you can’t waste any time getting the hell out of dodge. 

You’re surprised Cooper was stupid enough to think you would actually wait for him. The Knight’s had called for an air evac out of Filly and if you stay there any longer you’ll be back in the compound before you can blink. 

You’ve spent a month evading them, you’re not about to let yourself get caught because of Cooper. 

You can’t believe he’s not dead. It’s not like you’ve been losing sleep over killing him, but it’s been hard to cope with the fact that you killed the man that was once the love of your life. Seeing him again, though, you wished you had shot him in his smug face. 

You’d forgotten, in the time apart, just how condescending he could be. He seemed to think you needed him to survive. You didn’t. 

At best, he provided the comfort of company. Poorly. 

Despite how much he undervalued you, you were perfectly capable of taking care of yourself. You didn’t need him to save you. You would have figured your way out of there on your own, eventually. You’ve handled yourself a month in the Wastelands without him. You learned how to carve an existence for yourself out here and you did it without help. 

You race into the woods beyond Filly, putting as much distance between you and the sounds of fighting as quickly as you can. The trees around you begin to shake, the ground vibrating and a swirl of dirt and leaves rises into the air and whips you in the face. 

You look up and begin pushing yourself faster. One of the Brotherhood’s Vertibird’s is circling Filly. “This is not a hostile landing! Please remain calm!” You blame your distraction on the announcement. 

You would have heard him coming up behind you if you hadn’t been listening to whatever the Brotherhood was saying. Rope loops around your arms and you’re yanked backwards. Your head thumps painfully hard against the forest floor, rocks scraping you as you’re dragged across the ground. 

Cooper’s face appears over yours, a cruel smile on his lips. “Now, this seems awfully familiar.” He walks around you, boots straddling your waist and grabs you by the front of your shirt, yanking you back to your feet. “I thought I told you to stay put, sweetheart.”

You frown at him, shoving your leg up between his. He groans, doubling over while you shimmy out of the loose rope. “Honestly, after all the shit that’s happened you think I’m gonna listen to anything you say?” You step back from him, brushing the dirt off your clothes as best you can. 

You sigh in frustration when you realize that when the Knight’s had grabbed you, you’d lost your supplies. Cooper looks up at you and scoffs, “Missing something?” You eye his bag on the ground and start to go for it. He pulls the hammer of his gun back and you glance towards him. You’d forgotten what a quick draw he could be.

He’s fully recovered now, eyes narrowed in on you and gun pointed right at your chest. “See, a bullet to the chest might not kill me, but I reckon it’ll do a hell of a lot of damage to you. Why don’t you back up for me, sweetheart?”

You let go of his bag and slowly back away from him. He keeps his gun trained on you and stoops down, throwing his bag back over his shoulder. Your eyes dart to the hat on his head and your lips curl up when you spot the hole you’d put in it. 

Two hundred years and he’s kept that hat nearly pristine, you take no small amount of pride in being the one to ruin it. 

“The Brotherhood will be swarming these woods in a few minutes. They’re not gonna be too happy about one of their Knight’s being dead. Come with me, I can help you out.”

You scoff, “Like I’ll ever trust you again. You’ve shot me, sold me, and left me for dead, Cooper.”

He huffs, eyes narrowing and lips curled in a sardonic grin. You can tell he’s getting pissed off. “The choice is yours,” he tucks his gun back in his holster and turns on his heels. You watch in surprise as he stalks away from you. You had fully expected him to put up more of a fight, it almost hurts that he left so easily again. 

Then you hear the sounds of orders being shouted behind you. Metal creaking and stomping through the underbrush and you realize he hadn’t left but forced you between a rock and a hard place. You could follow him or let yourself get captured by the Brotherhood. 

“Fuck,” you mutter under your breath. You risk a glance over your shoulder and spot a rapidly approaching party of squires. You run in the direction Cooper went and find him leaning casually against a tree, a satisfied look on his face when he spots you. “Don’t say a word,” you warn, shoving past him. 

He glances at her from across the fire and finds himself feeling almost at ease for the first time in a month. It’s been a while since he’s looked up to actually find her staring back at him. She might look like she wants to kill him, but she’s here. 

“You have to admit, we make a pretty good team, darling.”

She gives him an unimpressed look, “Yeah, Cooper, we’re so great at murdering people.” She looks over to the dead bodies of the raiders they’d stolen this camp from and shakes her head. “I forgot how much death you surround yourself with.”

“I surround myself with? Might I remind you, you fired the first shot, sweetheart.” Granted, he had shoved her out of her hiding spot and given her no choice about it. 

Her head shoots up and she glares at him, “You made me!” She opens her mouth and he grins. He enjoys provoking her like this. Even if the last time he had she’d shot him because of it, but it’s fun to rile her up. She always gets so pissed off, it entertains him to no end. 

To his disappointment, she closes her mouth and shakes her head, choosing not to engage with him. He sighs and rips off a piece of jerky. “When did you turn into such a wet fucking blanket?”

Her eyes flare with anger, despite that, he can hear how hurt she really is. “Maybe when you sold me!”

He tilts his head and runs his tongue over his teeth, “You ever gonna let that go? I told you it was a mistake. How was I supposed to know they were gonna breed you like a prize pig?”

She scoffs, the noise high pitched and shocked. She shakes her head and stares at him with wide eyes, “You are unbelievable.” He shrugs and takes a swig from the flask he’d stolen off one of the raiders. He’s not sure how they make their alcohol, or if they trade for it, but it’s fucking disgusting. He frowns at the flask and drains the rest of it before tossing it into the woods behind him. 

She sighs and runs a hand over her face, her voice tired as she asks, “What’s the plan here, Cooper?” 

He picks at his teeth and shakes his head, “With what?”

She leans against the log behind her and gestures at herself. “With me. What, are you going to wait for me to pass out so you can tie me up and send me back to the compound? I’ve seen the price on my head. I know how valuable I am to everyone in the Wastelands.”

He doesn’t know why what she’s saying bothers him so much but it does. “You really think I’d send you back there?”

Her face is devoid of anything as she responds, “Why wouldn’t you?”

It’s the bluntness with which she asks that, that bugs him. Like there’s no other possibility but him betraying her. Taking advantage of her while she was vulnerable and weak and then handing her over to the people who want her dead. He wouldn’t do that to her. 

He didn’t go through all this fucking trouble to find her just to lose her again. He wants to tell her as much but she’s on her feet and grabbing her bag before he can. “Look, I appreciate the help today, but I’m not interested in starting this partnership back up again. I think it’s better if we just part ways.”

He whips his gun out before he can think about what he’s doing. She freezes, still bent over and eyes his gun warily. “I’m afraid that’s not an option, darling.” He can’t let her leave again. And maybe this isn’t the best way to go about it, but he doesn’t know how else to stop her. 

“You gonna shoot me, Cooper?” She whispers, her own hand twitching for the revolver at her side. He stands up and grabs her wrists, ignoring the way she struggles against him. He binds her hands with his rope and he sits back down, 

“I’m not gonna turn you in and I’m not gonna shoot you. But you’re not getting out of here that easy, sweetheart.”

Her eyes narrow in on his, her fists clenched tightly in anger. “I killed two men with my hands bound today. What’s stopping me from killing you?”

He shrugs, “Nothing. There’s nothing stopping you, just like there’s nothing stopping me. But I’m not killing you, am I? See,” he leans forward, “I’ve fought too hard and spent too much time looking after you to just let you go now. We’re in this together, whether you want it or not.”

Her lips split in a sneer and she throws herself down on the log. “You’re all the fucking same. You treat me like a goddamn dog that needs to be beat into submission. I’m not some misbehaving pet, Cooper!” Her eyes well up and her voice breaks, “You don’t get to just leash me and expect me to be okay with it.”

“I’m under no illusions that you’re happy here, sweetheart.” He runs a hand down his face and she shakes her head in disbelief. 

“Then just let me go,” she’s bordering on begging now and his chest squeezes the longer she stares at him with those pleading eyes of hers. It’s not something he’s familiar with, this feeling, this longing for her to just shut the fuck up and stop making this so damn difficult for him. 

“I can’t,” he mutters, wanting her to just drop it. 

“Why not?” She snaps, dropping any pretenses of trying to get him to sympathize with her.

He surges forward and grabs her by the jaw. Her eyes widen in shock and he smashes their lips together, teeth clashing painfully. There’s nothing gentle or sweet about this kiss. Her teeth are ripping into his scarred lips until the taste of copper is spreading on his tongue. He groans, digging his fingers into her cheeks until her lips part. 

His tongue probes against hers, the taste of his blood spreading into her mouth as well. She whimpers, the noise stirring something in him he’d forgotten about. There’s an old desire bubbling in him that’s making him blind to the rest of the world. He wants her, more than he ever wants to admit. 

He’s wanted her for a long time before this and they both know it. How hard he’s fought against it, against moments like these. He didn’t think he was still capable of this feeling, this desire for her. But it’s consuming. She’s ruining him, running him in circles until he thinks he’s going insane. 

But it’s not the same gentle passion it once was. It’s as twisted as he’s become. The desire to possess, consume, covet until she’s his and only his to do with what he wants. His teeth dig into her, letting her blood overcome the taste of his own. He groans, his free hand grabbing her waist and yanking her closer. 

She tastes so much sweeter than he does, he wants to rip a chunk of her off and eat her whole. He’s so distracted he doesn't even notice her pulling out her gun until he’s shooting back from her. He lands roughly on the forest floor and groans, hands clutched over the bleeding hole in his gut. Pain radiates through his abdomen and he rolls onto his side.

He looks up at her in shock. She’s spitting their blood onto the ground, her bound hands wiping at her lips. “Asshole,” she mutters. She tucks her gun back in her holster and looks over at him. 

His eyes are wide in disbelief as he struggles to sit back up. The movement causes another wave of pain and he hisses through gritted teeth, “You shot me!”

She rolls her eyes and gives him a blank look, “You’ll live.” He limps back to his own seat and lifts his shirt, watching as the hole closes over slowly and the blood stops leaking. She watches as he heals and sighs, “Unfortunately.” He tugs it back down and sighs at the state of his shirt. 

“My shirt won’t.” He digs a finger into the hole and tugs on it, watching as it rips wider. Two hundred years he’s kept these clothes, she ruins them in a month. Un-fucking-believable. 

“Sew it,” she gripes, still wiping at her mouth. “I can’t believe you just fucking kissed me,” she frowns and spits again, bits of crimson lingering on her lips. 

He sighs and leans back against the tree. “Felt right in the moment.” It did, he wants to do it again. They’re even now, they’ve both shot each other twice. No reason for her to shoot again. 

He wants to feel the way she shivers against him and moans into his mouth. She can be pissed all she wants but she kissed back, she can’t deny that. He’s sure if she wasn’t tied up she’d be a bit more receptive to him. Or maybe she just needs time to cool off after the whole compound incident, a month seems like a reasonable amount of time. Then again, women are so damn unreasonable. 

She tugs a knife out of her boot and positions it between her knees. She places it between her wrists and saws at the rope until it falls free. She slides the knife back in her boot and tosses the ruined rope at him. 

He catches it with a sigh and glances up at her. “Why didn’t you do that earlier?”

Her eyes are alight with a challenge, “I wanted to see if you would let me go yourself.” Well, clearly, he had failed her little test. “I wanted to see if there was even a possibility I could ever trust you again.”

He gives her an unimpressed look, slightly pissed off about his shirt. He never should have taught her how to shoot. If he’d known it would come back to bite him in the ass he wouldn’t have. “And?”

She gives him a disbelieving look and shakes her head. “And instead of letting me go, you kissed me.“ She throws her hands up in astonishment and glares at him. “Why the hell would you think that was a good idea?”

He smirks and revels in the way she shivers at the sight. “Well, darling, I’ve always been better with actions not words.”

“Yeah,” her voice is a challenge, eyes hard and jaw clenched tightly in frustration. He loves the sight of her all riled up. He loves it even more knowing he’s the one getting her like this. “What were you trying to tell me with that little display?”

He doesn’t answer her question, not wanting to just yet. “You liked it, didn’t you?” Her mouth snaps shut and she looks away from him. He laughs, leaning back and giving her a smug look. “You can be pissed off at me as much as you want, sweetheart,” the nickname rolls off his tongue like a taunt and she sneers at him. “But you want me just the same as you used to.”

“Do you like hurting me? Is that why you keep me around? You’ve been alone for two hundred years, Cooper. And for the majority of them you’ve harbored this hatred for me because you thought I had abandoned you just like everyone else.” 

Her words strike a place deep inside him that has him on edge. She knows what she’s doing. He’s forgotten, in his time with her, that in the same way he can get under her skin, she can do it too. She knows him just as well, she’s just always been the better half of their duo. She never feels the need to stoop to the level he does. But she’s doing it now and it feels like a kick in the teeth. 

“And I’m the only one that’s actually stuck by you.” She laughs, but there’s an underlying pain to it. She looks away from him and wipes at her cheeks and his fists clench within his gloves. “Is this your revenge? You think by torturing me you get back at everyone whose ever fucked you over. I’m sick of it, Cooper. I’m not gonna let you use me anymore.”

“I feel for you,” he forces the words out. He doesn’t want to tell her this. He shouldn’t have to tell her this. She should just stick with him, it’s what they’d always done, it’s how it always should be. Them, together. But she’s fighting against that, against him, so much that he doesn’t have a choice. 

She’s backed him into a corner he doesn’t know how to get out of. “In a way I haven’t in a very long time. I can’t let you go. Don’t you get that, sweetheart? We’re in this together.”

She shakes her head and he sighs. “No,” she looks at him and just shakes her head again. “No, you don’t love me, Cooper, or you don’t want me at least. I’m not the same girl I was, that’s what you’re after. That idea in your head, of us together, that’s who I was. You were right, the Wastelands changes you. I can’t be her for you and I don’t want to be.”

He chuckles and she shrinks away from the sound in suspicion. “Newsflash, darling, I’m not the same man. I loved you a long time ago, sweetheart, but I’m not capable of that anymore. Not for the girl you were, anyway.”

She nodded, her arms wrapped around herself. She looked like she accepted the answer, but he could see beyond that, could see that she thought he was rejecting her. It hurt, she could hate him as much as she wanted, but that still hurt her. “Good,” she muttered, “she’s gone.”

“Well, good.” She shrank further into herself and he grinned.  “You. You as you are now. That’s what I want. I don’t give a shit about who we were, the only person I’ve wanted since I’ve been out here has been you. You’re the only person I’ve met who can actually keep up with me. I don’t give a shit if anyone in this godforsaken Wasteland lives or dies, but I give a shit about you. You’re also the only one who can knock me on my ass.”

Her eyes darted to the hole in his shirt and a small grin came over her lips. “Haven’t been shot a lot, have you, cowboy?”

“No,” he chuckles again and grins at her, “I haven’t. Though, I am still pretty pissed about the hole in my hat.”

Her tone loses a bit of her playfulness and she glares at him, “You more than earned that.”

He acquiesces and holds up his hands in surrender, “Maybe.” She scoffs at that and rolls her eyes. “But I think we’re even now.”

“Barely,” she mutters, rubbing at the bruises on her wrists. She glances up at him and sighs, a surrender in her eyes. “But, it’s close enough now.”

He stands up and she eyes him warily as he throws himself down on the log next to her. He holds out a hand, “What do you say, darling, partners?”

She sighs and stares at his hand for a long time. He doesn’t mind, he leaves it there, hovering between them. He knows she’ll take it. “Deny it as much as you want but this is how it’s meant to be. You can keep fighting it or save us both some time.”

She reaches forward and tentatively wraps a hand around his, she uses it to yank him forward, their faces separated by an inch. “Shoot me again,” she whispers, “and I won’t miss the next time I knock you on your ass.”

“Oh shit,” you jump at the kickback on the rifle and nearly drop it to the ground. Cooper laughs and reaches around you, taking it from you. 

“Maybe I should have started you off with something with a little less kick to it.” He props the rifle against the tree and glances over to the cans you’d been shooting at. Well, you’d gotten one out of five at least. 

In all fairness this was the first time you’d ever handled a gun, you’re sure you’re doing fine for a beginner. He sucks on his teeth and looks at your targets. The serious look on his face cracks and he’s clearly trying to fight off laughing. 

You shove at his shoulder, smiling, “Shut up. I’ve never used one of these things before.”

He picks the rifle back up and starts laughing now, “You mean a gun?” 

You throw your arms in the air in defeat and slump into the patio chairs he’s dragged to the back of the cabin. “This is pointless, anyway.” He cocks the rifle and lifts it up to aim properly. In quick succession he knocks the remaining four cans off the fence. You roll your eyes at him, “Show off.”

He smiles and takes a seat next to you. You remain silent for a while, gazing across the yard and to the towering mountains across from his cabin. You appreciate him inviting you here. When you’d told him how overwhelmed you’d been feeling with all the new publicity you hadn’t expected him to drag you all the way out to his mountain home. 

You wouldn’t have accepted if you’d known it was just going to be you and him. You’d thought he was bringing his wife and kid, too. Spending a long weekend playing house with Cooper wasn’t going to do anything in getting rid of your crush. It was just getting worse the longer you were around him.

Waking up everyday and having him be the first person to greet you was going to send you into an early grave. You swear your heart’s never beat this fast around anyone else. He seems to be the only man who's ever had you feeling this head over heels. 

“I think it’s important you learn.”

You glance over at him, surprised at how serious he sounds. He’s still staring out at the mountains, but his gaze is distant. His mind is some place else. “Why?” You ask, voice quiet, afraid to spoil the moment.

He finally blinks, gaze darting down to his hands and the rifle still in them. “It’s easy for people to dismiss the war nowadays. They weren’t there, they didn’t watch as hundreds of good men and women died for them.” You frown, sometimes it’s easy to forget that he’d been fighting on the frontlines. He’s so good at being a socialite, you feel guilty that even you sometimes forget he was a soldier before he was Cooper Howard. 

His voice is heavy, the tension thick around the both of you. “They seem to think the war is over. I know it’s not, it’s just going to get worse. People can bury their heads in the sand as long as they want, but when the fighting is at their front door, what are they going to do?”

You reach out, hand covering his own. He finally looks up at you and you smile. “I appreciate it, Cooper.”

His eyes quickly look at your hand before looking back at you. “For what?”

You shrug, moving closer to him and lacing your fingers with his. You shouldn’t indulge yourself like this, but you can’t help it. He seems so sad and you only want to make him feel better. You just want to take care of him, the way he takes care of you. 

“For always looking out for me. You’re always there, I appreciate it. I appreciate you.”

The sad cast over his face finally breaks and he smiles at you. His hand squeezes yours once, then again and he looks back out at the mountains without saying anything else. You don’t think he needs to, that either of you needs to. Sometimes you understand each other better without words. 

You’ll always be there for one another.

You eye him warily and he holds the jerky out further. “Aren’t you a little curious?” He taunts, waving the jerky around in front of your face. You know he thinks you won’t take it. That he’s just screwing with you. He’s been doing this ever since you agreed to tag along with him. Teasing you at every given opportunity. 

You snatch it from his hands and rip a piece of it off. It kind of tastes like beef, if not a little sweeter. There’s also that metallic radiated tang to it. You chew it slowly, savoring the slightly caught off guard look on his face. You swallow it down, forcing your face to stay straight and not give away how disgusted you feel right now. 

He chuckles, leaning back and looking at you with something that seems like appreciation. “I hope you know that was ass jerky.”

You gag now, glaring at him and tossing the rest of the jerky at his smug face. “You’re such a dick.” You take a swig from your canteen and swirl the water around your mouth. It gets rid of the taste well enough but you’re never going to get over the fact that you swallowed a part of someone’s ass. 

He suddenly gets serious, swatting at your arm and motioning to the front of the store. You crouch beside him, watching as a raider walks out of the front doors. You don’t get why they chose an old movie store for their hideout, but Cooper had it on good authority that they had a decent cache of supplies inside. 

The last time you’d followed him into one of these things, you’d nearly died, and then he’d sold you. You’re still not fully trusting of him. The only reason you’re with him now is because you need extra security from bounty hunters after getting booted out of Filly. 

If he wasn’t such a good shot, you would have never given him a second glance. Despite how much he insists the compound was an honest mistake, you find the trust slow to come. You’ll let him take the lead on this one, you’re not confident in him having your back if things take a turn. 

He moves forward and you hang back, keeping watch while he slits the guard’s throat. He lowers the body quietly to the ground and you creep behind him, following him through the doors of the store. 

This group is smaller than the last one you dealt with. Only five of them with no extra guards outside. Cooper ducks behind a dust covered shelf before they can spot either of you. You go to the other side of the store, moving slowly along the edge until you have a good shot. 

You take out one man and Cooper manages to hit two more before they start firing off their own guns. You dart back behind the shelf, willing to let Cooper handle the last two. But one of them dives behind the shelf and grabs at you. 

Another shot goes off and his friend’s body hits the ground while he rounds the corner with you. He’s got an arm wrapped around your throat and the barrel of his gun pushing so hard into your skull you can feel an indent forming. 

It wouldn’t be hard to shoot this guy, you still have your gun in your hand. Cooper seems to realize that, too, from the questioning look he gives you. You drop your gun to the floor, you want to see what he’ll do. 

Maybe you’re stupid, gambling with your life like this. But you don’t feel any fear, not from the guy holding you hostage at least. You just keep your eyes locked on Cooper’s. They’re so familiar to you, yet so distant. Like a stranger you’ve known all your life. 

He slowly rises from the floor, hands raised in the air in surrender. “Alright, let’s just see if we can’t talk this out like gentlemen.”

The guy holding you jerks you roughly, gun banging painfully against your temple. You wince but remain quiet. “Stay back or I’ll blow her goddamn brains out!”

Cooper’s eyes dart from your face to the guy. He huffs, frowning and pursing his lips like he’s trying to think of a way to talk himself out of this. He could leave, he’s got enough time to make it through the door before he fires at him. 

Or he could help you. 

It’s the only reason you let yourself get caught. If he wants your trust he’s going to have to prove it. Cooper looks at you and a grin splits across his face. It’s like he’s read your mind, from the knowing look on his face you think he might’ve. 

Then again, you never really needed words to talk to each other. 

With a speed that never fails to catch you off guard his hand darts under his jacket and he draws his gun. He’s shooting the man before you even get a chance to brace yourself. Your body gets dragged back slightly by the dead weight but Cooper moves forward and wraps a hand around your shirt, tugging you into him. 

Your hands shoot out, bracing yourself against his chest. He peers at you from under his hat and grins, “You didn’t really think I was gonna let you go that easy did you, darling?” Your eyes dart down to his lips, you feel like you can still taste him. 

The timing of his kiss might not have been appropriate, but he certainly hadn’t made it forgettable. Nothing about him was forgettable. As much as you wished he could be. You hated yourself for still letting yourself fall into his trap. 

Hollywood might have once labeled you as the most seductive actress of your generation, but Cooper had you beat. He kept you coming back even when you knew you shouldn’t. He had you wrapped around him and all you wanted to do was squeeze until he let you go. 

You push off of him, ignoring how much you want to pull him closer. You move towards their pile of supplies, “Let’s see what we’ve got.”

There are a few different posters set up in the old movie store that intrigue him. But the one that’s caught his attention the most is set up directly behind her. Her back is to it, so she hasn’t gotten a chance to see it yet, but it’s all he can focus on. 

The Outlaw and The Sheriff

Their first movie together. 

He looks at her and huffs out a laugh, she glances up at him for a moment before she begins rifling through her bag again. She looks like she walked right off the fucking poster, hat and all. She’s the spitting image of herself, but she seems so different. 

Maybe it’s the eyes. The light there has changed, dimmed slightly from how it used to be. She used to seem so naive to the world, like a little lamb that just needed some guidance. Now, he wonders just how much of the world she’d seen before he found her. If maybe she had never been as innocent to it’s cruelties as he’d once assumed. 

She stepped into this new role of hers just as quickly as he had. You didn’t just change that quickly without knowing already just how awful people could be. 

“Sweetheart,” she looks up and he points behind her. She turns around and looks up to the poster.

She scoffs, moving to stand beside him, “I always hated how I looked in that.”

He glances over at her and shakes his head, “Probably shouldn’t show you a mirror anytime soon, then.” Her hands reach up to fiddle with the brim of her hat and she smiles, a real smile for once. 

“No, I suppose not.” Her hands trace over her lips, he glances back at the poster. At that old signature of hers. She always had to have those red lips. “It’s so different,” she whispers and he knows she didn’t mean for him to hear. Her eyes glisten and he frowns. 

He shouldn’t have shown her. It’s not like he enjoyed seeing those fucking Vault-Boy posters, he sure as hell hated seeing clips of himself. Why would she enjoy seeing who she used to be? Who they used to be?

Things used to be so simple. He loved her, she loved him. Now he’d fucked up so much he wasn’t sure she could ever look at him the way she used to. He didn’t want who she was before, he couldn’t handle that. This new her, well, he didn’t give her near enough credit. 

But he wouldn’t hate seeing someone look at him like that again. Endless adoration and unflinching loyalty. He knew he would follow her anywhere, he’d realized that a while ago. He didn’t have anything in the Wastelands, nothing but hate and spite to keep him going all this time.

Now, he had her. He just needed her to realize that she had him just the same. She had him wrapped around her and he hated it and loved it at the same time. Hated her and loved her for it all the same. 

He tugs his glove off before he reaches for her. He cups her cheek, thumb tracing over her lips before she turns towards him. His eyes meet hers and he smiles slightly at the familiarity and mystery to them. So much of her he recognizes and then there are these new parts he’s yet to discover. 

He wants to discover all of her. Learn everything he can about her all over again, feed his desire to consume her entirely. 

She pulls him in this time, her lips chapped and cracked. Her arms wind around his neck, yanking him closer and he tugs at her. She tastes as sweet as he remembers and it only makes him crave more. More of her, more of anything she’ll let him have. 

She pulls back from him, pressing her hand against his chest, slowly backing him against the wall. He lets her ease him to the floor and she throws a leg over his lap. She settles herself above him, both her hands tightly grasping his neck, crushing their bodies together, eyes gazing intently into his own. He doesn’t know what she’s looking for in him but she seems to find it when she leans in once more. 

She isn’t giving him a chance at control, she’s got a leash on him, pulling back anytime he tries to lead. He relents, following her as she slowly explores him. 

He’s not sure how long this peace between them will last before one of them inevitably fucks up. But they’re stuck together now. It doesn’t matter what happens, he’s not letting her get away from him again. 

She’s his, always has been, always will be. It’s been that way since before the fallout. He’s led her, guided her.

He had loved her as a different man. History always seems to repeat itself with them. As twisted as the world is, as twisted as they’ve become, they always seem to drift back together. No matter how much the both of them fight against it. 

He’s giving in now, giving into her. 

end. — I do not own the characters or the game/show Fallout, but this writing is my own all rights reserved © not-neverland06 2024. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.

#cooper howard x reader #the ghoul x reader #fallout x reader #fallout tv series #how about a nuke? #cooper howard #the ghoul

[diorsluv]

casual , part 12

“ knee deep in the passenger seat and you’re eating me out ”

series m. list previous chapter next chapter

( socialmedia!au )

edwards.73

liked by yourusername, trevorzegras, and 204,167 others

edwards.73 appreciation post

tagged: yourusername

view all comments

yourusername 🥰

→ edwards.73 ❤️

rutgermcgroarty you actually did it

→ edwards.73 yea why would i not

→ rutgermcgroarty so is this like… a hard launch… ???

→ edwards.73 yeah i guess so

username18 OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GODDD

username26 YEAHHH LES GO HE DID IT

mackie.samo was this purely to spite rutger

→ edwards.73 maybe, maybe not

→ rutgermcgroarty why r we using the govt name

markestapa AYYYY

→ edwards.73 yes mark i hard launched

→ markestapa i can see that

username57 this was. shocking!!!!

username12 LOOK AT HER SHES SO CUTE HERE

adamfantilli when did this occur

→ edwards.73 right now

→ adamfantilli did she even know you two had a label

→ edwards.73 she labeled us first i just never corrected her 🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️

→ mackie.samo yikes

→ luca.fantilli uhhh

→ rutgermcgroarty 😬😬😬

→ dylanduke25 thats not really…

→ edwards.73 what

→ edwards.73 is that not a good thing???

colecaufield this got less cute as i read more and more comments

→ edwards.73 i’m confused

vivianliu doesn’t seem very appreciative

trevorzegras YEAHHH KID

liked by edwards.73

username46 good thing happened from bad intentions

username70 oh look it’s a hard launch

username35 oh…

lhughes_06 i have no words

_quinnhughes nope don’t like this one

jackhughes 🙃

_alexturcotte iiiiiii don’t know how to feel about this

username64 these comments r very… not as lively as they should be

username79 🥳🥳

yourusername

liked by lhughes_06, adamfantilli, and 276,829 others

yourusername blue days for the blue gals 💙

view all comments

luca.fantilli ur caption makes no sense

→ yourusername blue = sad

→ luca.fantilli ur sad???

username28 personally i think you should drop him

username16 would now be a good time to exercise my weekly #RUTSUPREMACY privileges

liked by yourusername

→ username35 oh my god she liked the comment

vivianliu YOU NEED A YELLOW DAY. BECAUSE YELLOW = HAPPY. BLUE - BLUE + YELLOW = HAPPY.

→ yourusername i had an aneurysm reading that

→ vivianliu i had an aneurysm writing it

→ vivianliu BUT REGARDLESS IM STILL RIGHT AND U KNOW IT

→ yourusername mmm

→ vivianliu please babe i just want to see you smile again

lhughes_06 did he make u sad.

→ yourusername hi lukey

→ lhughes_06 im taking that as a yes

→ lhughes_06 next time i see that little shit someone’s gonna have to hold me back

→ vivianliu luke! you. don’t. know. how. to. fight????

→ lhughes_06 HOLD ME BACK

username61 awww the outfits are cute

username57 our little fashion queen ⁉️

rutgermcgroarty how about instead of moping we go have a little best friends day at mini golf

→ yourusername im not moping 🤬

→ vivianliu you’re both getting destroyed

→ rutgermcgroarty vivi we all know what your golfing skills are like

→ yourusername rut come pick me up in an hour

→ vivianliu u cant putt for shit dont even talk to me mcgroarty

trevorzegras you’re not updating me on any of this

→ yourusername IM SORRY TREV

→ trevorzegras don’t call me don’t text me 😕😕

username81 girl i need u as my personal stylist

→ username50 FR

adamfantilli i fw those blue pants

→ yourusername ofc you do

→ adamfantilli wdym by that 😢😢

→ yourusername nothing but i am surprised that u didn’t bring up the blue jacket

→ yourusername 😉😉😉😉😉😉

→ adamfantilli you’re not funny

→ luca.fantilli she’s pretty funny

_quinnhughes isn’t that mom’s old skirt

→ yourusername yeah why 🤨

→ _quinnhughes just wondering

→ jackhughes he thinks it looks good on u rosie

→ yourusername AWWW thanks guys ☹️☹️

username5 i’ve never seen someone so pretty before oh my god

colecaufield i’m ready to square up if you need me

→ yourusername oh god

→ colecaufield gonna give that douche a knuckle sandwich 🤬

→ _alexturcotte why are you so violent all of a sudden

→ trevorzegras you punched a wall turcs shut up

edwards.73 why

→ yourusername idk

→ edwards.73 ok

username16 UR SO PRETTY HE DOESNT DESERVE U

jackhughes i told you 10 times be careful with him

→ yourusername will he do what it takes to survive??

→ jackhughes please not again

→ markestapa is that what i think it is

→ mackie.samo is it that one play with the man bun guy

→ luca.fantilli DID SOMEONE SAY HAMILTON

→ rutgermcgroarty no one said hamilton

→ dylanduke25 I HOPE THAT YOUUUUU

→ yourusername BURNNNNNNNN

next chapter notes ) i haven’t updated this in a week guys am i cooked?!?! wanna start that rut au so badly but i don’t want it to flop and i also don’t wanna put another au on hold 😔😔

tags: @dancerbailey3 @hughesfein @loveforaugust @alwaysclassyeagle @love4ldr @inhoodmood @bunting58 @crazycat-ladys-blog @smoooore @bunbunbl0gs @lilasianmeat

#ethan edwards #ethan edwards fanfic #ethan edwards fic #ethan edwards x reader #ethan edwards x y/n #luke hughes #jack hughes #quinn hughes #trevor zegras #alex turcotte #cole caufield #mark estapa #mackie samoskevich #dylan duke #adam fantilli #luca fantilli #rutger mcgroarty

[thesandsofelsweyr]

THE SUS BOY NEXT DOOR

《 PART 3/3 // READ ON AO3 // TAG 》

After coming back from a terrible blind date your asshole neighbor is the last person you want to see right now. He doesn’t have his signature scowl for you tonight, however. Tonight he seems terrified.

《WORDS》 1,484 《CHAPTERS》 1 2 3

《PAIRING》 Arkhamverse Jason Todd x Female Reader

《TROPES》 Hurt/Comfort, First Meetings, Neighbors, Pre-Relationship

《WARNINGS》 Aftermath of Torture/Violence (canon typical), Panic Attacks, Scars, Blood and Injury, Swearing

《TAGLIST》 (in replies because tags aren't working in the post for some reason)

《NOTES》

This takes place immediately after Jason leaves his failed Batman confrontation and run-in with the Joker from Arkham Knight: Genesis Part 6.

Reader is a true crime addict who enjoys red wine 🍷

I just want y’all to know that this chapter was written for you—I prefer the story ending at Chapter 2 😉

If you enjoy the read please kudos, comment, and reblog ❤️

《 ALSO ON AO3 》 (comments & kudos there are very much appreciated!)

You catch the door before it clicks shut. You don’t want to leave him like this. You can’t leave him like this, so you inhale a deep breath and creep back inside, steeling yourself for rejection or another hateful outburst.

His weeping tapers off into sniffles and the occasional cough. You can feel his eyes following you as you pad over to his couch and grab the neatly folded throw blanket, casting a furtive glance towards his gun, which is still lying undisturbed where you left it, before returning to him. His eyes have fallen away from you—his head sagging between his slumped shoulders, chin touching his chest—and you hope he hasn’t gone away again to that terrible place in his mind. When you drape the blanket around his shoulders he flinches but gives no other protest, even pulling it more tightly around himself. He doesn’t order you to leave—doesn’t even acknowledge you’re there—so you kneel down in front of him, careful not to crowd him. He looks so defeated, so beaten down by the world; an abused child wrapped up in his security blanket for comfort after another unfair punishment. Your heart can’t help but break for him.  

You sit for a moment, listening to his soft sniffles and harsh breathing until you find the right words to say. Then you open your mouth to speak but he beats you to it.

“I’m sorry,” he mumbles to the floor again, his tearful eyes hidden behind a curtain of sweat-damp black hair.

For what? Passing out? Getting strangled? Knocking me to the floor then screaming at me? But you keep those questions to yourself, asking him instead: “Are you sure you don’t need to go to the ER?”

He slowly shakes his bowed head, as if it’s filled with lead, as if those awful memories of his are weighing it down.

“Then why don’t you lie down? Maybe get some rest?” you suggest. “I can bring you some Ambien…”

Your voice trails off because he shoots you a wary look. But then his face softens and he nods before muttering, “No drugs.”

“No drugs,” you echo softly, your brain jumping to conclusions again about this brooding man of few words. Perhaps he’s a recovering addict or something. You push yourself to your feet then reach out a hand to help him up. He stares at it then his eyes fall away again. He’s really not a fan of eye contact.

“I don’t even know your name,” he says.

“It’s Y/N,” you offer eagerly. “What about you?”

There’s a pause, and for a moment you think he’s going to ignore you, but then he answers, “Jason,” in a barely audible voice, as if he’s ashamed to utter the word aloud.

Heavy silence swells around you and you’re acutely aware of your outstretched arm hanging awkwardly in the air. He wipes his bleeding cheek against his shoulder, smearing more blood onto his hoodie. You pull back your proffered hand and use it to push a lock of hair behind your ear as you fumble for something to say to fill the uncomfortable silence that stretches on. And suddenly you're back at dinner with John Preston Anderson III trying to make conversation while he scrolls on his phone, pretending you don’t exist. You have to swallow down a bubble of anger that threatens to erupt.

“I’m… sorry for whatever happened to you, Jason. I… can stay with you, if you want.” Suddenly your face is afire and you’re mortified that you just invited yourself to sleep over at his place only seconds after learning his name. “On your couch, I mean,” you clarify, blushing furiously, but his eyes never leave the floor. Thankfully.

He coughs then shakes his head again. “I already ruined your night.”

A bitter laugh bursts out of you at that without your permission, and his head jerks up, startled, bloodshot eyes snapping to yours. You clap both hands over your mouth as if you can shove the rude sound back inside you. Guilt grips your heart as you see the pained expression on his pale face. It’s not anger or hurt or annoyance, but rather that same look of fear that you witnessed earlier when he was cowering in the corner, as if your laughter frightened him. 

You rush to explain, to put him at ease. “I’m sorry, it’s just that… if you only knew the night I’ve had. Anyway, I’m glad we finally got to meet. It’s nice to put a name to the-the face.” You stutter that last part, realizing after the fact that it’s probably not very nice to bring up his unmistakably-scarred face like that, or complain about your night to the guy who got strangled, so you blurt out before your mind can catch up with your mouth: “It isn’t every night that I get to help a handsome stranger in distress.”

Your face somehow turns an even darker shade of crimson. How many times can you put your foot in your mouth in one conversation? But to your surprise and relief you’re rewarded with a little laugh from Jason, a sound that seems awkward and unnatural, as if he doesn’t get to laugh very often. Some of the color returns to his cheeks as he blushes the prettiest shade of pink. When the corners of his mouth quirk up into a timid smile you realize that he has absolutely gorgeous lips, despite the swelling. Full and soft, finely laced with small silvery scars—little arrows pointing to where they need to be kissed. Jesus Christ. Again, you literally just learned the guy’s name and now you want to kiss him. No, that’s a lie. You’ve wanted to kiss him since his rude ass scowled at you the first time. What is it with you and Ted Bundy types?

“I’ll have to pass out more often,” he says shyly, fingers plucking at the blanket wrapped around his shoulders. His blue-green eyes find the floor again, as if his script is written there. “Turns out it’s a great way to meet beautiful women.”

Beautiful… beautiful… The word echoes in your mind like a heartbeat. No one has ever called you beautiful. Your chest comes alive with sudden warmth as butterflies take flight. You want to stay there with him for the rest of the night. To kiss him on his busted lips. To wrap him up in your arms. To protect him from whatever hurt him. Instead, you grab one of the discarded ice packs and hand it to him, heart still fluttering wildly in your chest. “Google says you should get some ice on that. Your throat, I mean.” Goddamnit. He just said you’re beautiful, and you reply by handing him an ice pack. How the hell are you so bad at flirting?

“Who am I to question Dr. Google?” he replies sarcastically with a smug little smirk on those beautiful lips, but still does as he’s told, accepting the ice pack then holding it against his red-ringed throat.

You gaze down at him as you grope for the perfect words to say that will turn this scene into one worthy of a romcom. You consider inviting him back to your place to share that bottle of merlot you’ve been dreaming about all night. But then remind yourself that the poor guy is traumatized, definitely in no shape for a romantic nightcap. You can’t help but find yourself wishing, as if you can will it into existence, that he’ll look up at you, that your eyes will meet, sparks will fly, and he’ll flirt with you again. Maybe even invite you to stay the night with him. But his eyes remain glued to the floor, and your heart drops in disappointment as your ridiculous delusions are dashed by his silence.

“I should… probably go, for real this time. It’s late.”

“Yeah.”

“Are you sure I can’t do anything for you before I go?” you ask, coming back down to earth from the high of his compliment and seeing him again as the guy who’d gotten cut and strangled then passed out cold on his floor rather than an object of your lust.

He shakes his head, then he glances up at you, those stunning blue-green eyes of his finally finding yours, sending a fresh flutter to your chest. “You’ve done more than enough. It was… really nice having someone to talk to. To… distract me from… other things.”

His kind words give you a boost of confidence. “Well If you ever want to talk again, you know where I live. Or if you need a babysitter.”

You smile at the puzzled look that crosses his face and nod towards his houseplant.

He laughs that adorable little laugh again. “I may take you up on that offer sometime. Goodnight Y/N. And… thanks again. For everything.”

“Take care of yourself, Jason.”

#sands writes #jason todd #female reader #arkham knight #arkhamverse #jason todd x reader #arkham knight x reader #jason todd x you #arkham knight x you #reader x jason todd #reader x arkham knight #jason todd imagine #arkham knight imagine #jason todd fanfic #arkham knight fanfic #fic: the sus boy next door

[mistystepmoonbeam]

Reborn into BG3: Chapter 12

You're reborn into BG3 with only the memory of your past life. Now you're Tav's companion on his journey, and must learn about yourself as much as your new reality.

Chapter 12: You take a walk through the cellar in the blighted village. When the others catch up you say something that freaks out Astarion.

Word count: 2.6K

A/N: I was undecided if I wanted to post this >.> But what the hells.

You’re on your own, now.  Just for a bit, thanks to Wyll convincing Tav you don’t need to be watched at all times.  And with no more goblins between you and camp you’re able to be left alone to sort out…yourself, you guess. 

You didn’t throw up again after leaving Ethel’s, but you may have done some crying as you walked in circles around the forest by the village.  If it wasn’t for having to face the others you’d have run back to camp, pulled scratch into your tent and bawled your eyes out.

Though you promised to go back to camp you find yourself in the blighted village.  You can't read the sign at the entrance but you know it says Moonhaven, and you try to memorise what you think the letters might be.  

A little stop can’t hurt, you think.  Anything to avoid a conversation about what happened.  And you can collect the herbs that are in the cellar, along with anything else that might be useful.  You take a small swig of the health potion to get the taste of bile out of your mouth and then stash it into your bag, since it’s now nearly empty after leaving your personal hoard at camp, and head down into the cellar.  Whatever objects had been clinking in there remain a mystery–you still haven’t looked inside and won’t even as you add more to the pack.

As much as you had wanted to abandon your staff you took it with you.  Necromancy or not, it could bludgeon someone should the need arise.   And apparently it can cast light in a small radius around you because it does just that when you make it to the bottom of the ladder.  

With a slight purple tint, the staff lets out an eerie glow giving you just enough light to see by.  There’s a small buzz of energy through your body that you assume is the Weave.  Not wanting to question things anymore, you get to work prying open the barrels and crates and find the herbs you’re there for.  You circle around and pick up a couple health potions, a couple mystery potions to be identified later, and find the hidden lever.  You hesitate before pushing it down, but curiosity gets the better of you in the end.  You watch the shelves move and step into the secret cave.

Now that you’re aware of the phantom limb and what it has been reaching for, you can feel the dead weigh on your mind.  You know where they are, kind of in the same way you could navigate your room in the dark.  They’re permanent objects stuck in place, and should you so desire, you can reach out and move them. 

“I guess I’m a necromancer,” you mutter as you pluck a bone cap out of the ground.  “Awesome.  Couldn’t be a wizard or a sorcerer or…wait, am I one of those?”

Wyll seemed to make it sound like a necromancer was separate, but it kind of was a subcategory of wizard.

You straighten and keep moving, turning the corner and finding the cavern.  You ignore everything there and head for the mirror that waits beyond the wooden planks.  

When you step up to it the staff's eyes glow violet again, and the mirror slides open.  You sigh.  “Necromancer it is, then.”

But…maybe there’s a clue to your identity in this place if you’re powerful or rich enough?  You move inside and find the lab on the right, the paperwork scattered about, and logbooks.  Or you assume they’re the logbooks—you can’t read, after all.  Instead of flipping through them you head to the exit and find the rusty key on the shelves.  Soon enough you’re standing before the first trap that lights the braziers, and risk the step.  The room is filled with light as the fires blaze to life.  

The Necromancy of Thay is just beyond the barred door, and this time you can hear it.  It whispers to you, quiet little voices that speak in a language you don’t know.  They’re distant, but like with the bodies of the dead you know where the book is.  

It takes some strength to push the rusty key into the padlock on the door, and with some force you manage to turn it.  The whispers quiet.

“A well hidden laboratory, wonder what it’s doing down here?”

You turn to find Tav, Wyll and Astarion walking into the lab.  He still has both eyes, at least.  After he outed Astarion you thought he might take the hag’s deal. 

“How did you find this place?” you ask.  

He only offers you a shrug, eyes darting around the lab in search of loot.

You relent,  “I found the hatch and started looking around.”

Tav smiles and rests his hands on the back of his head.  Maybe he’s just happy you aren’t ignoring him again, or running away.  By the way his tail flicks at the air you think that might be it, and the reason he’s being quieter than usual.

“I followed your tracks,” Wyll reveals.  Well, he did hunt down all sorts of beings as the Blade of Frontiers.  “What have you found?”

“Creepy book,” you reply.  They approach you, surveying the book and everything else in the small cage.  

“Trapped, most likely,” Astarion says.  He steps forward carefully and does something to the stand the book is on.  It’s so quick you don’t have time to peer around him and get a good look at what “disarm trap” really looks like.

Astarion picks up the book, turning it in his hands.  They begin to discuss what it could be when you remember the bracers that are down here.  You slip away without a thought and find the nearby gilded chest, poking it before opening it.  There are traps here, who knows what else could be rigged to explode?

When you open the chest you feel a wave of magic—Weave—come from it.  It’s different from the warmth of the healing magic, somehow sharper, more demanding.  You pull the bracers out and put them in your bag, nearly overflowing with loot now.  

You turn to rejoin the group only to nearly run into Astarion on the level below you.  You stumble back and catch yourself.  “I think Shadowheart was right about putting a bell on you.”

He gives you a smirk, genuine, your surprise.  A thought occurs but rather than ask it you bite the inside of your right cheek.  

“You are just full of surprises, aren’t you?” Astarion asks.  You don’t know what he’s referring to, considering the amount of surprises you’ve had lately.  He goes on, waving one hand in the air.  “Filthy rich, can’t read, enchanted clothing, and now, a necromancer.”

“To be fair, I don’t know anything about all of that.”  You try not to sigh too hard thinking of what Auntie Ethel had said.

“I wonder what other secrets that little head holds…” he muses.  It’s more to himself than you.  “And you killed on my behalf, I’m flattered.”

“I didn’t mean to, though.”

“I know, that’s what makes it all the more entertaining.  You, the picture of innocence, murdered a man for a vampire spawn.  Ha!”

You furrow your brow, unsure how you could be considered the picture of innocence.   But maybe that was only compared to those Astarion knew.  It was your first murder…and only murder!  Not first.  Just the one, and only, murder.

Yes, you are rather innocent in the terms of this world.

Astarion pinches your cheek between two fingers, bringing you back to the conversation.  “Don’t think this makes us even.”

“Okay,” you say when he lets go.  You rub at where he’d pinched, shocked he touched you so casually.  And not just that…his fingers are warm.  “Uhm…”

Astarion quirks a brow.  “Yes?”

“Can I ask you a question?  About being a vampire.”

He leans his weight into one foot, crossing his arms as he eyes you warily.  “I suppose.”

“Why are you warm?  Shouldn’t you be, like, cold?  Or room temperature?”

Astarion, for all his acting, is easy to read.  His eyes widen as he steps back, arms uncrossing and held out before him like he’s trying to catch his balance.  “What did you say?”

“Sorry, is that rude?”  You shift on your heels.  “I just thought vampires would be cold, with the…being dead, and all.”

“We are,” Astarion confirms, voice grim. 

“But your skin is warm.”

“I assure you, it is not.”

“I literally just had your hand on my cheek.  You’re warm.”

“I think I know what temperature my own body is!”  Astarion huffs and walks away.  You notice the bag that rests on his back has the weight of the book within.  

You move down the steps as he paces, annoyed.  

“What’s wrong, Astarion?” Tav asks.

You answer, “I asked him why—”

But you don’t get to finish it because Astarion wraps one hand over your mouth and the other on the back of your head, successfully silencing you.  He says, “Nothing!  Nothing at all.  Just discussing what reward I might offer for valiantly saving me from a monster hunter.”

You roll your eyes.  But having his skin on yours again confirms his heat.  He feels like a living, breathing human.  Why did that freak him out?  When he releases you he gives you a hard stare that’s easy to understand.  Shut.  Up.

Wyll and Tav watch you, waiting to see what you say but you just shrug.  “It’s not that important.”

Wyll frowns, but lets it go.  For now.  Tav bites into his bottom lip but keeps silent.

Astarion’s words remind you of something you’d like to forget.  The Gur.  You can’t even recall his name right now.  Maybe you should have tried harder to keep Astarion away, or convinced them to not go there at all.  But you didn’t, and there was no reset now.

You watch Tav flit about the basement collecting loot.  It does little to help your mood, but at the very least you take comfort in the fact that they didn’t call you a monster for what you did.   You promise to keep better watch of those chords in your head, the little phantom strings that connect to the dead around you.  Because avoiding the dead is an impossible task, at least as long as you travel with Tav and everyone.

When you return to the surface the others are waiting by the well.  You spot your bag of gold on Gale’s shoulder and hurry to take it from him, but he holds up his hands to stop you.  “What kind of man would I be if I let an injured person carry so much weight?”

You’re about to argue but think better of it when the world sways a little.  You manage to stay still, probably, and thank him instead.  

“Oh, right,” you say, pulling the magic bracers from your other pack.  “I thought you might want these.”

Gale takes the bracers.  It’s then that you notice the bags under his eyes are especially dark—and you realize he hasn’t told anyone about his condition.  As far as you know.   The little lines that travel up the side of his neck and towards his left eye are darker, too.

Your thumbnail scratches at your staff as you wait for him to say something.  Anything.  Literally anything would be good right now because it’s been ten whole seconds of him staring at the bracers and that’s long enough of him being silent that the others are now looking.

“Gale?” Tav asks.

It jolts him out of his stupor.  “Yes?  Oh, yes.”  He looks at you.  “Thank you.  Perhaps there’s something I must admit…”

Gale goes through his first speech about the orb, and then his second.  It’s a lot to take in in one go, if you haven’t heard it all before.  At the end he says, “I understand if you want to part ways—this orb, for lack of a better word, is immensely dangerous.”

Tav asks, “Why?”

All eyes turn to him, his head tilted with a smile on his face.  

“Because I could explode,” Gale says slowly.  

“So?”  Tav points to each companion as he adds, “Shar worshipper, warlock turned devil, angry githyanki, infernal engine that could explode, vampire, necromancer with memory loss, and I’m sorry Halsin we’ve barely just met, but…uh, old?”

There are worse things to be said, about all of you.  

“Plus we’ve all got worms in our heads,” Karlach says.  “Oh, well except for…”

Gale lets out a small laugh.  “Thank you.  All of you.  Now, even I’m getting tired of my own voice so shall we get going?”

The group begins their journey back to the goblin camp. 

“I am not angry,” Lae’zel says, her voice almost a hiss.  “At least not at any of you.  The mindflayers, however…”

Halsin walks next to her, asking questions about the tadpoles and their magic, while Astarion and Wyll follow, then Shadowheart, Karlach, and Tav.  You and Gale are last to leave the village.

“You knew, didn’t you?” Gale asks. 

You hesitate too long before answering.  “No.”

“You are a terrible liar.”  He keeps his voice low as you walk, putting the bracers on his wrists.  “But I consider that a good thing.”

You chew the inside of your cheek, unsure of what to say.  They seem to consider your knowledge to be some kind of deadly premonition, so maybe you should lean into that.  “I can’t really explain it.”

Gale smiles but it’s weak.  

“We’ll find lots of stuff for you to eat,” you assure him.  “Or absorb, I mean.  Like those!”

You point at the bracers.  He holds them closer to where you know the orb is tattooed on his chest, breathing deeply. 

“And if we can’t find anything there’s always my boots, or coat.”

“You would offer me those?”  Gale looks you up and down like he had when you’d first met.

You shrug.  “Of course.  Oh, do you need them now?  Because I just need to sit down to get them—”

You lift a foot as you walk, nearly stumbling to the ground when Gale stops you.  “No, no, I’m fine for now.   I am just—very grateful to have such a generous companion.”

“It’s not really generosity if it’s something you need though,” you argue.  

Gale smiles gently but moves on.  “So what’s this I hear about you being a necromancer?”

Whatever emotion crosses your face makes him pull back and try to change the subject.  Regret, maybe, or pain.  You can’t focus on controlling your features with so much going on.   “I don’t want to be…that.  I can feel…I can feel where they are—like something is dragging behind me.  It’s heavy, but easy.  I don’t want it to be easy.”

“Just because something comes easily to you doesn’t mean you need to do it.”

You look up at him, unaware your gaze has been on the ground this whole time.  “But I did it by accident.  I can’t—I can’t exactly control it.”

“That’s no problem to learn,” Gale says, as if moving the dead was no harder than riding a bike.  “Learn to control it, and don’t use it.  Though if you can move a boar in your sleep you must have some considerably…powerful benefactors in Baldur’s Gate to deal with.”

“What do you mean?”

“I don’t mean to frighten you,” he says, “but if you can use magic without the intent, without the movements or incantations, then you hold a great power.  And that is something that doesn’t go unnoticed by the wealthy elite.”

Chosen.  Like Gale had once been of Mystra you too could be the preferred mortal of a god.

“Meaning there may be some unhappy people if I don’t use magic.”

“It’s only one possibility of many,” Gale assures you.  “And until we know more I am happy to help you control your magic.  I’m told I’m an excellent teacher.”

You twirl the staff between your fingers and laugh.  “It would be an honour to learn from you.”

Taglist:

@half-poison-and-half-hope @sanscas @hotmesshobbit @godoffuckedupcats @thequeen-oni @terrenuserinj @straewberrysoda @theomnipotentfox @becksynthetic @quitecontrary-to-mary @furblrwurblr @mega-trash-cringe @fandomsbookclub @dontneedbiologytoadopt @pebble-bb @v3lv3tvampir3 @mrow-kat @jeneralmischief @notsaelty @runaway-17 @aoirohi @tinswhimsy @xxgrimripp3rxx @kemonocat-blog @thetiredtoad0-0 @sleepydang @iwannabealocalcryptid @troutberryspoon @betwixttheweave @the-pale-elfs-love

#reborn into baldur's gate 3 with no memory and plenty of money #reborn into bg3 #astarion x reader #tav x reader ??? #I keep forgetting about the staff to be honest #bg3 fanfic #bg3 fanfiction

[mybworlds]

Chapter 3: A Cloud of Pleasure

Pairing: joel miller x f!reader (no use of Y/N) | Rating: 18+ Minors DNI | W.C.: 2.8k

Summary: Your life sounds perfect: you live with a perfect man, you live in your dream house, you do the job you love, you don't miss anything, except love and passion.

Warnings: no use of Y/N, use of you, reader is a photographer, reader has no physical descriptions except hair (no type or color) long enough to hold on to, unspecified age gap, Joel and reader are two cheaters, for a while. Smut, use of pet names, dirty talk, masturbation, unprotected PiV but the first time, creampies, comeplay, oral (both f and m recieving), exhibitionism, size kink, personal use of an unspecified sex toy. No outbreak here. Let me know if I missed anything!

Before to leave, thank you very much for your silent support ❤️

Masterlist

follow @mybworlds and turn on notifications to get notified when I post new fics

Thx for the dividers @saradika-graphics

Taglist @harriedandharassed

The temperature has dropped quite a bit, you're cold, so you shrug your shoulders as you stand at one of the hotel tables having breakfast with the man you ran away from last night. Joel wanders his gaze from your eyes to your hands to the little balcony overlooking the beach, perhaps also uncertain what to do. You are joined by a waiter who disposes of your dishes, “Are you storm-locked too?”

“Yes,” the two of you reply in chorus and then look into each other's eyes for a long silent moment.

“I'm afraid it lasts a while,” the waiter adds again, shaking his head.

“A half hour?” you ask hoping to hear a yes.

“Maybe yes or maybe the whole day, we'll see.” replies the man again.

“If I need to change, can I go back to the room?” you ask again.

“I don't know, either they let you use the changing room or maybe yes. Either way, talk to the attendant at the front desk.”

“Thank you.” you reply, the man leaves and you find Joel's eyes on you again “What?”

“You're afraid to be with me.” he says narrowing his eyes, and it's not a question his.

“No, but what-”

“From the first moment we saw each other in your store,” he continues, “you had that reaction. I'd like to understand why, if I gave you reason to be afraid of me, if I said or did anything.”

“No,” you're the one who interrupts him this time, “it's not you.” you sigh, you already know you're going to regret saying those words, but you have to, it's not fair for him to think there's something wrong with him “It's me being afraid of what I can do.” you blurt it out.

Joel doesn't comment right away, he wanders his gaze from your face to your figure a couple of times, then looks up at you again “What could you do?” he repeats “Are you a serial killer?” he adds barely holding back a smile, a smile escapes you too “No, seriously, what are you afraid of?”

You know you will regret saying those words even more than the previous ones, but by now you are on a road with no turning back, “I immediately felt a strong…uhm…a strong…” you scratch your forehead in a nervous gesture as he takes your hand interrupting that gesture and wrapping it completely, it is so warm and big, you have palpitations and you even feel like you are covered in a cold sweat.

“'s that why you stopped me last night?” he asks you, you nod almost unable to sustain his gaze, you should tell him that you are engaged for ten years to a wonderful man, but for some strange reason, it's a thought that doesn't cross your mind “I got it, you know. I realized it even last night during the wedding party that you are a person who doesn't relax easily, who is afraid to experience the emotions to the fullest.” your breath becomes short "Let go," he adds, as he moves closer to you placing a hand in your hair and very slowly bringing his lips closer to yours, you hold your breath almost still resisting that contact, ”Let go.“ he says again, his warm breath against your lips breaks your ability to resist because you are the one who shortens the distance and places your lips on his, initially it is a chaste kiss lips against lips and nothing else, then things change when he caresses your lower lip with his tongue making you moan "Honey," he murmurs almost on the lips barely tightening his grip on some strands of your hair and making your faces come even closer together if possible. Everything that happens next is an escalation that you can no longer control or stop: Joel has persuaded the attendant to have you use a room because you're not feeling very well, or at least that was the excuse, you're actually perfectly fine, you are shaking.

You're trembling from the excitement of being in Joel's arms, of being able to be his, of being in a situation you absolutely shouldn't be in.

You are squeezed between the bed and Joel who has you caged in his arms, he kisses you very slowly first on the lips, then along your jaw, up to your earlobe, and vice versa, you have your hands resting on his back savoring this attention he is giving you with your eyes closed and your lips parted. Lightning flashes light up the room from time to time while he grabs in one hand a strand of your hair and pulls it slightly so that you bend your head to the side and expose your neck, his soft lips graze your skin as his beard teases it.

“Joel?” you call him, laying your hands along his sides.

“Hmm?” he mumbles giving a kiss on your neck and then looking into your eyes.

“Can I take this off?” you ask him taking his shirt between the fists of your hands.

“So needy.” he says giving you a soft kiss on your lips and then sits down on his knees thus making you sit down too so that you are facing each other, he raises his arms and you slip off his shirt making him reveal himself in all his mighty, you find yourself swallowing in observing his shoulders, his broad chest and the strip of dark hair disappearing in his pants, “You like what you see? “ he teases you by placing one hand behind the back of your neck and the other at the level of your breasts before kissing you.

You lace your hands behind his neck as you feel his hands fumbling with your shirt buttons, he opens it completely and only then does he pull his lips away from yours, “Fuck,” he murmurs licking his lips as he slides your garment off your shoulders, he lays his lips on your neck making you lie back against the mattress, “You have the softest skin, baby,” he continues by running his lips down your collarbones, then on your still covered breasts. You sigh closing and opening your eyes at his caresses and his lips lapping at your still covered breasts, you moan softly opening your legs and bending them so that he draws them even closer to you, “So needy,” he repeats to you and then moving just away from your breasts and unfastening your bra. Your nipples immediately harden on contact with the cold air of the room and in front of his gaze. You swallow in front of his dark eyes full of lust staring at your breasts before he bolts up and takes a nipple between his lips.

“Fuck,” you groan, abandoning your head to the side and closing your eyes in arousal as you feel his tongue gently pinch now your nipple, which hardens more and more in the face of his attentions, you thread your hand through his hair as his tongue continues to tease you relentlessly as he passes from one breast to the other. You arch your back repeatedly, it is wonderful.

“You really needed care and attention,” he teases you when he lets go of your other nipple as well. You are in a pitiful state, you are already horny as hell and you already wished he was inside you thrusting until you forgot even who you are but instead he is still on you playing with you “Lost your tongue?” he teases you with a half smile.

“No,” you groan breathlessly “I'm waiting for you to continue.” you tease him in turn returning his smile and kissing him yourself this time, you take advantage of his pause to reverse positions and sit on him where you feel his erection, you tease him a little by rocking you back and forth to grind your center on his bulge and this makes the two of you hold your breaths, you smile “Lost your tongue now?” you ask him approaching his face and kissing him hard. His hands travel down your back caressing you and then return to your breasts caressing them a little less gently this time, but that's okay, you like that way too.

In the meantime your hands travel along his chest while your lips are on his flushed neck with the veins clearly evident, then you go down to kiss his collarbones and kiss his breasts first one and then the other, you feel his gaze on you, you look up at him “Does it bother you?” you ask him stopping for a moment.

“No, but no one had…don' mind, go on.” he replies, as you again gently bring your lips close to his breasts feeling him hold his breath and then release it heavily, your lips then continue until they reach the waistband of his pants, you pull your lips away from him and unfasten the waistband looking him in the eyes, you lower his pants and boxers together releasing his massive arousal that rests on his soft stomach “You like what you see? “ he asks you again caressing one cheek and drawing you to him to kiss you, it's a gentle kiss now, slow and his hands rest on your hips still covered by your pants, "Stop bragging." you tell him nudging him just barely with a smile, he lays back down resting his head on the mattress "Alright, honey." he mumbles closing his eyes and breathing deeply.

You go back to looking at his shaft, it's really big, crisscrossed by several veins, there's a very visible one running through it all the way to his mushroom tip, your mouth is watering “'s my favorite part of me,” he continues to tease you, oh you really want to shut him up and you know how. You place your lips on the tip of his throbbing cock kissing it gently and he finally stops teasing you.

You look for his eyes and see him watching you with lust-filled gaze and then you return to his erection and begin to play with it by slowly wrapping it between your lips. You hear Joel hold his breath and then moan heavily. He is really big, you almost feel like you are choking, but you want to enjoy every moment with him. You swirl your tongue around the tip as if it were a delicious ice cream cone, tasting his precum pearl, "Just like that" he whispers before you start to suck and pump fast, you adore the softness and hardness of his manhood “Fuck, that's it!” he moans in a hiss, grabbing your hair with both hands holding you there as he thrusts vigorously into your mouth almost choking you and then suddenly leaving your mouth.

You catch your breath, “Fuck,” he moans pulling you up on top of him with one hand on your back and stroking your lower lip with the other “I was about to come…. “ he tells you breathlessly, "but I don't want to yet, I have to make you come first," he adds causing you to shudder hard, you look him in the eye passing a hand through his hair "Don't worry," you tell him placing a kiss on his lips, he looks at you as if you just said heresy ”Are you kidding! Don't worry, just relax,” he tells you by reversing positions and having your back against the mattress again.

He places a kiss on your lips again and then shifts his attention to your elastic pants pulling down your legs, you remain with your lips parted almost holding your breath, not knowing what to expect.

The roaring of thunders fade while he kisses your still-covered mound making you almost flinch in surprise, “You're already wet, you naughty girl,” he says with a small grin continuing to kiss your still-open mound, “Joel, please,” you beg him slipping a hand through his hair to let him know he has to stop to tease with you. That's when he also lowers your briefs exposing your intimacy to his focused and lust-filled gaze, you seek his eyes, never had anyone observed your intimacy like that making your skin crawl with the immense desire to be touched. He touches with a fingertip first one of the outer lips making you jerk and lower your gaze towards him, Joel then looks up at you “Don't worry, I'll treat her as she deserves,” he says then caresses the other one as well gathering some of your arousal, you moan softly tightening your lips “Don't hold back,” he urges you repeating the same movement with exhausting slowness making your skin crawl and abandon your head on the mattress again closing your eyes.

His fingers play some more on your mound only to be replaced by his lips causing you to snap your eyes open and look down, seeing him between your legs and devoting so much attention to your intimacy almost causes you to spasm. His hands open your intimacy to him and to his mouth, which begins to lick your intimacy along its entire length making you moan and sigh louder and louder, you thrust your hands into his hair pulling a few strands of his hair from time to time, he repeats that gesture several times and then devotes himself to your clit caressing and sucking it gently first faster then “Joel, fuck, fuck,” you gasp clutching his hair tighter and tighter abandoning your head back and spreading your legs further and further, “J - Joel, I… I - oh, fuck, I'm going to-” you moan sonorously and then your climax occurs between his lips as he continues to collect your nectar.

When the spasms of your climax leave you, you loosen your grip in his hair until you pull your hands away altogether, look down, and see him still there intent on kissing your intimacy; then, it's his turn to look at your eyes, “I'd say no one has ever made you cum,” he comments with a half grin.

“Stop bragging and come here,” you reply by sitting up to encircle his neck with your arms and make him lie on you again to kiss him. Although you still feel the contractions of your climax, the taste of you on his tongue and his hands holding you caged beneath him arouse you again “Please make me cum again.” you beg him, barely pulling away from his lips.

“If you ask me so nicely,” he replies smiling at you just barely and then resuming kissing you, “I gotta grab a condom, darlin'” he says pulling away from you as he gets off the bed. You see him take the package and unwrap it, he sits on the bed and slips it on. The mere sight of it makes you moisten even more.

Joel returns to you and with one hand you feel him reach down to your intimacy, almost probing that you are still wet for him. The two of you almost hold your breaths as the tip of his cock lines with your intimacy and then he fills you up “Oh, fuck!” you exclaim almost in unison gasping. Joel fills you all the way and never before had anyone come to touch such internal points of you, he remains only a few moments still to allow you to get used to his presence.

Your eyes close from the intense pleasure you are experiencing, “Open your eyes,” he tells you, you open them, you almost feel as if you can't see as well as the pleasure you are feeling “I know,” he tells you, then giving you a kiss on the lips before starting to move. You moan as he thrusts back and forth, in and out at a faster and faster pace that quickly takes your breath away and makes you moan louder and louder, "So tight, so wet fo' me" he gasps while you hear the pelting rain in the distance.

His thrusts are stronger and deeper as your clearly hear the squelching sounds of your soaked folds “Joel, I'm…I'm…” you stutter moaning, “Baby, me too,” he says without slowing the pace until you arch violently against him letting out the loudest moan you've ever let out, he also grunts loudly in your ear as he comes.

Then, he comes out from inside you and he removes the condom tossing it in the trash. He lies back down beside you, you are both breathless.

You are shivering.

You had a good time, a very good time, but it is only at that moment that you are reminded of Patrick and realize what you have done, a great sense of guilt wells up inside you, and you turn your back to Joel, who is watching you perplexed.

“What's goin' on?” he asks you, “Hey,” he says laying a hand on your shoulder so you turn to him and resting a hand on your cheek “What's goin' on? Did I hurt you?” you shake your head ”Didn't you like that? Did I do somethin' wrong?”

You sigh and sit up bringing your knees closer to your chest, “There's something I haven't told you…”

“You married?” he asks you wrinkling his forehead.

“No,” you answer.

He almost seems to relax, “Then what's up?”

“I'm not a free woman,” you tell him, resting your head on your lap and ready to hear him rail against you. Deep down he would be right, you certainly are not free, he for what you know is and he did nothing wrong in fucking a stranger, it is you who should not have.

“Okay…” he says “I have a question to ask you and please look me in the eye,” you look at him biting your lower lip softly “because from your answer, there are two possible scenarios.” he continues “You happy with him?”

The big question, are you still happy with Patrick? There was a time when you would not have thought twice about it and would have answered sure, of course. And now what do you answer?

You swallow, observing his dark eyes, then the words come out so naturally “Not anymore, I mean…I was fine with him for a long time, then things changed and I've been trying for two years already, I keep telling myself that sooner or later this time will pass, but” you shake your head “it doesn't go.”

He nods, “What 'bout him? Is he also no longer happy or is it something only 'bout you?” you open your mouth to answer, but the truth is that you don't know what to say. Patrick is the sweetest, quietest person you've ever met and that's also why you fell in love with him a long time ago “Just as I thought,” he adds again as he gets out of bed “Anyway, don't worry. I wasn't looking for any story or girlfriend, y'know.” he says before entering the bathroom and turning on the shower faucet.

You lie down again resting an arm under your head, feeling like a slut.

Joel has told you that what has been between you is a noncommittal thing anyway, but can you ever accept this new version of you? Can you accept that you only fucked? Have you really fallen that low?

When Joel comes out of the shower, he hears you talking on the phone with Patrick to whom you ask to pick you up by telling him that the car doesn't start. As you talk to your fiancé, Joel casts long silent glances at you; you watch him too, observing the features of his face, the muscles in his arms, his soft tummy, his now distended but equally large shaft, the well-defined muscles in his legs. Patrick tells you he would leave right away but it will take him two hours to get you, you simply thank him as he interrupts the call with a shy I love you.

The storm's over by now. You are outside the hotel again, but something inside you has changed. You don't know if you like what you have discovered about yourself, you don't know if you can live with it. You feel wrong and guilty.

Joel leaves you in front of your car, you look at each other, he is about to say something, but you shake your head lowering your gaze. You don't know what he wants to say, but at the moment you are overwhelmed by events. He nods silently and then with one last indecipherable look he drives away, leaving you alone in the car.

You are sitting there waiting for Patrick, you don't know what has become of the good girl you always thought you were, you knew you were - not perfect, of course - but at least normal, now you are like so many other women who have betrayed their partners in order to feel again that breeze of newness, that breath of life after years of a now flat relationship.

Patrick rescues you by using the wires thus managing to start the car, on the return trip you think back to what you did, how you gave yourself up after a feeble resistance to the advances of a stranger about whom you know what he wanted to tell you and maybe it is not even the truth. When you get home, your fiancé wants to help you carry your luggage, but you refuse, saying it's light and you can manage it, he cuddles you as always and even makes you dinner. You eat in silence, you justify your silence with some tiredness, but who knows if he has realized that there has been a passing cloud in your life that has unleashed a storm inside you and that you don't know what possible consequences it may bring.

#joel miller #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x reader #joel miller x female reader #joel x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller smut #joel tlou #joel miller hbo #tlou fanfiction #tlou fic #the last of us hbo #joel miller self insert #the last of us #joel fic #the last of us fanfiction #joel the last of us #pedro pascal #pedro pascal as joel miller #smut #joel x f!reader #joel x female reader #joel x you #joel miller fic #pedro pascal fandom #pedro pascal characters fanfiction #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro pascal character fanfic

[epicbuddieficrecs]

Weekly Recap | May 12th-19th 2024

Had a wonderful long weekend with a friend, what about you guys? Anyone else super nervous about this week's episode? 😅

Complete

all roads lead to eddie diaz by wafflesofdoom/ @capseycartwright (S7, BuckTommy, Pre-Buddie | 1,2K | General): eddie and tommy have a revelatory conversation about the buck of it all.

another thing i forced to be a sign by bellabrady (Post-7x07: Ghost of a Second Chance | 2K | Not Rated): Or: Buck finds out about Kim, which leads to him calling Eddie out on the pattern with relationships.

🔥 I hang on every word you say by ColorMeParanoid/ @color-me-paranoid (Getting Together | 4K | Teen): “I couldn’t help but notice how hesitant you’ve been about getting back onto the dating scene despite saying that you’re ready,” Buck said, going for nonchalant and likely missing it by the mile. “I figured a little boost in confidence and a crash course in how to pull off a perfect first date wouldn’t hurt.” Or, the one in which Buck assumes Eddie sucks at dating and decides to do something about it

just release me, i can't take it by actualalligator/ @actualalligator (Post-Lawsuit | 5K | General): After the fight in the grocery store, Buck withdraws the lawsuit and leaves town. Maybe for good.

i'll look after you by ipretendtobesane/ @useramor (Buck&Chris | 6K | Teen): “You don’t have to kiss it, Mads,” he started telling her around ten years old. Maddie would ruffle his hair and scoff. “Of course I do, punk. How else will it seal the deal?” It was the only comfort he knew. It’s also the only tradition he can pass down to Chris. or: buck and chris building their own set of traditions throughout the years

how forever feels by icesculptures/ @ice-sculptures (Madney Wedding AU, Getting Together | 8K | General): Or: tired of the growing distance between them, Eddie asks Buck to dance at Maddie and Chimney's wedding, healing more than his own heart along the way.

🔥 Cowboy With a One Track Mind by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Canon Divergence, Not A Firefighter Buck | 22K | Mature): Spin-off Sequel to Evan Buckley & the Coma-Verse of Madness - Chapter 7 (Land): Grieving and tortured, Evan Buckley has been living alone in Montana in a remote cabin for nearly a decade. After an incident that leaves him missing six months of his life, and suddenly in connection with a group of strangers from Los Angeles, Evan must decide whether to remain in his self-imposed exile, or take a chance at life again.

WIP

🔥 some things fall when they're meant to fall by sibylsleaves/ @sibylsleaves (Post S7E5 | 2/4 | 11K | Teen): or, Buck tells Eddie some news. Eddie has a realization and breaks up with his girlfriend. Not necessarily in that order.

What’s Your Order? by JJK/ @trenchcoatsandtimetravel (Post-S7E5, BuckTommy | 5/6 | 14K | Teen): 5 Times Buck Guessed Tommy’s Coffee Order + 1 Time He Didn’t Have To

🔥 stuck now so long, we just got the start wrong by Daffi_990_ao3/ @daffi-990 (Canon Divergent, Different First Meeting | 5/10 | 39K | Not Rated): Probational Firefighters Evan “Buck” Buckley and Eddie Diaz meet on a call which ends with them at odds with each other. As the months roll by, they keep running into each other on the job, much to Eddie’s dismay and Buck’s delight. Can they put aside their first opinions and misunderstandings and allow the seeds of friendship, and possibly something more, to take root?

🔥 change the prophecy by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Alternate Timeline, Curse/Magic | 11/12 | 26K | Mature): Buck has never felt secure in any of his relationships; he’s been searching for someone to see him the way he feels he’s meant to be seen, but after things start going downhill with Tommy, he thinks that person might just not exist. Eddie cannot figure out what’s wrong with him when it becomes clear things with Marisol aren’t going to work out. But what if they’re both forgetting something?

🔥 for all the haunts and homes of men by euadnes/ @kananjarus (Canon Divergent, Post-Apocalyptic, Station Eleven Crossover | WIP | 15/? | 126K | Mature | Warning: Violence): The year by the old calendar is 2025. Home is gone. Home is a failed rescue mission and an echo of a memory. Home is a lost boy living in a wooden house by the sea. But first, there was a promise. Christopher, when it's safe, I'll take you back to your father. Buck had all but given up on keeping it after the world had died and everyone in it. But just as some oaths refuse to be forgotten, so the same can be said about the endurance of love.

🔥 Held Up a Lightning Rod (Wonder Why I'm Struck) by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels/ @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (Not A Firefighter Eddie, Sugar Baby Buck | 2/? | 10K | Explicit): When Eddie Diaz stumbles his way into money, he finds himself one of the most eligible bachelors in Los Angeles - to his dismay. He needs a way to get people off his back without confessing his messy marital situation, and Shannon's still not answering his calls, so he caves to a friend's suggestion: hire someone to pretend to be his partner. Enter Evan "Buck" Buckley: sugar baby, fire fighter, and the man about to turn Eddie's world upside down.

🔥 Steal My Sunshine by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Altered Memories | 5/9 | 15K | Mature): Memories hazy and unreliable, Eddie Diaz wakes up every morning in a house at the end of a cul de sac, goes to his office job at a petroleum engineering company, and comes home to his wife and son. But something is missing, and the more Eddie begins to put the pieces together, the stranger the predicament he finds himself in. 

Podfic

🔥 [Podfic] maybe i'll be brave enough by then by Silverkat1620/ @silverkat1620 // fic by trippedandfell/ @trippedandfell (Amnesia | 20-30min | Teen): “So,” Eddie starts, taking a long sip. “How long have I had the ring?” Hen chokes on her coffee. “I’m sorry,” she says, eyes wide behind her glasses. “What ring?” or: an amnesia au (with a twist).

🔥 [Podfic] Fire on Fire by Itty_Bitty_Blondie/ @itty-bitty-blondie for extasiswings/ @extasiswings (Quarantine, S4 | 30-45min | Teen): "You’re sleeping with him.” “I’m not—” Eddie rolls his eyes and corrects himself halfway through. “I’m not sleeping with him like that, okay?” Sophia looks at him for a long moment as her gaze turns from teasing to thoughtful. “But you want to be. Right?” [Or: Buck and Eddie get in the habit of sharing a bed while living together during quarantine. It's platonic until it isn't.]

🔥 [Podfic] Here, Beneath My Lungs by Itty_Bitty_Blondie for glorious_spoon/ @glorious-spoon (First Kiss | 5K | Teen): “Okay, okay, come on, let’s do this,” Buck says, in a trying-to-be-serious tone that just sets Eddie off again. “Come on, we’re gonna do this right. You need the full Buckley Experience.” “Someone’s confident,” Eddie manages. “I know what I’m good at,” Buck says, and something about the way he says it—grinning and smug with laughter still leaking out of the edges of his smile—makes Eddie go still.

🔥 [podfic] not all of us are heroes (not all of us are brave) by Matriaya // fic by withmeornotatall/ @chronicowboy (Post-S6, Getting Together | 45-60min | General): Buck shakes his head and grimaces apologetically at Marisol. "I'm so sorry for interrupting your night," he tells her. "I'm gonna leave you guys to it, but it was nice to see you again." "Nice to see you too," Marisol replies with a smile. "Sorry again," he addresses this one to Eddie. "I didn't think. I just—" "You thought Chris needed you," Eddie says softly, eyes so warm Buck wants to stay here forever. "Don't apologise for that." "Right, well." Buck takes a deep breath to calm his still pounding heart before saluting at Christopher. "Forever at your service, Superman." He backs out of the kitchen in an exaggerated bow, ducking to hide his smile when Christopher's laugh follows him out.

🔥 [podfic] brick by Itty_Bitty_Blondie/ @itty-bitty-blondie // fic by spqr (Post-Coma, S6, Getting Together | 1-1.5h | Explicit): The first thing Buck noticed when he walked through the door was the smell of plaster and wet paint. There was a white spot on the wall in the living room, primered but without any color yet, about the size of a man’s fist. Eddie looked sheepish. His knuckles were still bruised, scabbed over but healing. “You were in a coma,” was all he said. “Yeah,” Buck agreed. He knew the feeling.

🔥 [Podfic] I Hit the Accelerator (But the Car was in Reverse) by MistMarauder/ @mistmarauder for extasiswings/ @extasiswings , letmetellyouaboutmyfeels/ @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (S2-3, Friends With Benefits, BDSM | 7-10h | Explicit): When Buck is forced to confront the truth about his breakup with Abby, having casual sex with his hot new coworker seems like the best rebound idea. Unfortunately, that hot new coworker turns into his best friend. But best friends can keep having sex with each other, right? There's no way this could possibly go wrong.

#epic buddie fic rec #buddie #buddie fanfiction #buddie fic rec #buddie fanfic #buddie fic

[danieyells]

@mayoigotokurousagi TIME FOR OUR FAVORITE FRANKENSTEIN'S MONSTER INSPIRED MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL. I mean. Maybe there's another you're into. Idk. I like Jiro. He's so. . .blunt. I'm so curious about him, I really really cannot wait until we get the Mortkranken chapter.

also, uh, brief content warning for a mention of assisted suicide? It's only the first line I post, if you feel the need to avoid that.

No Affinity Required

"They said they wanted to die, so I prescribed them what they needed. I don't see the point of discussing ethics after the fact." あちらさんが死にたいと言うので、必要な薬を処方したまでです。今更倫理を持ち出されても、困りますよ

Hey. Buddy. Jiro. That's fuckin' dark dude. This is why you don't joke about wanting to kill yourself. Someone will take it seriously. Jiro will just hand you cyanide pills, a bottle of water, and direct you to a hospital bed to die in. Like jesus christ.

"I save lives that can be saved. It's part of my job to decide the order of priority though." 救える命は救いますよ。まあ、そこに優先順位をつけるのがこちらの仕事なので

"part of my job is to decide if your life is worth saving" IS ALSO A VERY DARK THING TO SAY. I love that his default lines are all very dark and callous. It kind of drives home a dichotomy between how he feels about just anybody and how he feels about you. I also like that he's just. . .kind of dark and gloomy and like ASPECTS OF HIM ARE VERY UNPALATABLE. Like I'm sure there are a lot of people who see those lines and think "that's gross why would anyone like him he's the worst" and THAT'S A GOOD KIND OF CHARACTER TO HAVE ESPECIALLY AS A LOVE INTEREST okay moving on

"One of our patients is thrashing around again? That's inconvenient. I'll administer a shot." また患者が暴れてるんですか？ はあ……面倒くさいですね。１本打っておきますよ

jiro stabbing you with a sedative filled needle like 'stop moving. you are annoying.'

Affinity 2

"I was in a prolonged coma, so I haven't fully recovered yet. It's been a long time since I ate anything." 俺、長いこと昏睡状態だったんで、まだ本調子じゃないんですよ。飯なんて、しばらく食ってませんし

i wonder when he woke up. it must have been a few months ago at most.

Affinity 4

"I'm about to receive my medication. It should take approximately one hour. Are you going to wait for me?" ああ、今から投薬の時間なんです。多分１時間くらいかかると思いますけど、待ちますか？

Affinity 5

"I attend classes every day since Yuri does, but sometimes they mark me as absent. I'm supposed to reply when they say my name? I didn't know that." 佑理に付き合って毎日授業に出てるんですけど、時々欠席扱いになってて。 返事が必要？　知らなかったな

"yeah you're supposed to let them know you're there." "i am one of the largest people in the room at any given time. that seems unnecessary." also it's cute that he only goes to class because Yuri does, but also he doesn't learn anything from it since he studied it all independently lol

Affinity 6

"The blood? I believe one of the wounds on my stomach tore. I'll have to get Yuri to suture it." ああ、この血ですか？　さっきから腹の傷が開いてるみたいなんです。佑理に縫ってもらわないとな

Affinity 7

"What's the purpose of educational facilities like this? You can learn everything you need through self-study." こういった教育施設って、なんのためにあるんでしょうね？　勉強なら自分ですればいいだけですし

Affinity 8

"Who is that noisy blond person? He runs away whenever he sees me. That's rude, isn't it?" 時々見かける、うるさい黄色の人は何者なんです？　 俺の顔を見るといつも逃げるんです。失礼ですよね？

i love the 'isn't it?' like he doesn't know normal social convention but he's pretty sure you're not supposed to run from people like that.

Affinity 9

"You don't have to mind me. Go ahead and eat. Even in childhood I never really had an attachment to food, clothing, or shelter." 俺のことは気にせず、飯食ってください。元々、ガキの頃から衣食住にあまり執着がないので

hey jiro that's uh that's kinda fucking depressing you good?

Affinity 10

"Yuri's holed up in the lab, so I'm going out. If he comes looking for me, tell him I went to bed." 佑理が研究室に籠ってるので、今のうちに出かけてきます。もし俺を探してたら、寝たと言ってください

Wouldn't Yuri just check your bed and not find you there though??? Also when will you sleep???? like i know he doesn't realize a week of allnighters isn't normal but jfc

Affinity 11

"Your face looks terrible. Come over here and inhale this. They're mild smelling salts. They'll wake you up." あなた、ひどい顔ですね。ちょっとこっち来て、これ嗅いでください。 軽い気付け薬です。目が覚めますよ

Affinity 13

"I can just manage to ingest water, so I brew herbal tea as an indulgence. Would you like some too?" 辛うじて水分なら取れるので、嗜好品としてハーブティーを淹れるんですよ。あなたも飲みます？

Affinity 14

"Yuri wouldn't get up, so I was about to give up on getting my morning medication. He got up after the ninth time he used the snooze button though." 佑理がなかなか起きないので、朝は���薬を諦めようかと思いましたよ。９回目のスヌーズで起きましたけど

Yuri and Jiro, like Rui and Haru, need healthy sleep schedules please.

Affinity 15

"What's this? A rice ball? I suppose I might be able to eat some of it." なんですか？　これ。 おにぎり？　まあ、少しくらいなら食べれるかもしれませんが……

can't you only eat fluids. . .are you gonna throw that up later. . . .

Affinity 16

"You already had tea at Frostheim? The tea I make tastes better though, so please drink it anyway." フロストハイムで紅茶を飲んできたんですか？　 まあ、俺の方が美味く淹れられますから、飲んでください

lmao the mortkranken boys really do not appear to have a great opinion of frostheimers!!! "you had tea at--pfffff nah their tea sucks ass drink mine instead."

Affinity 17

"I enjoy being alone. The noise doesn't really bother me when I'm reading though. Can I go now?" ひとりの時間は好きですよ。まあ、本を読んでいる時は、周囲の喧噪も気になりません。もういいですか？

Affinity 18

"What am I doing? I'm making confections. I'm used to making precise measurements when preparing medications, and it's quite similar to that." 今ですか？　製菓をしてるんです。 計量は薬の調合で慣れてるので、まあ、似たようなものです

jiro makes cupcakes and candies and stuff. . .he can't even enjoy them though. . . . .

Affinity 19

"See you tomorrow. ...What? You're the one who told me I should say that while smiling." また明日。 ……なんですか？こう言って笑えばいいと、あなたが言ってたんじゃないですか

i love lines where it's like 'you told me to do this so now i'm doing it.' especially when the pc is shocked when they actually do it lolol

Affinity 20

"We're doing a complete check up today, so please change into these. ... Do you need me to help you undress?" 今日は精密検査なので、この検査着に着替えてください。 ………… 脱げないなら、脱がしましょうか？

strip faster bitch

Affinity 21

"You want to know why I started studying anomalous infectious diseases? I don't know. I just became knowledgeable about them at some point and kept going." なぜ怪異伝染病の研究を始めたか？さあ、気がついたら詳しくなってたので。何となく続けてるだけです

Affinity 22

"My wounds often tear so I've told Yuri deep dermal suturing would be more effective than simple interrupted, but he won't listen to me." よく傷口が開くんで、結節縫合ではなく真皮縫合の方がいいと言ってるのに、佑理が聞かないんですよね

I get the feeling Yuri doesn't listen to most people. . . .

Affinity 23

"Yuri's combat skills are poor, so I have to protect him. If he dies, there won't be anyone left who can treat me." 佑理は戦闘が下手なので、俺が守るしかないんです。あの人が死ぬと、俺を治せる人がいなくなるんですよ

"if he dies i die so i'm just kinda protecting him because i have to." kind of an oof lmao

Affinity 24

"It's been a long time since I had a family, so I don't know what you're supposed to do in these situations. Could you teach me?" 俺には長いこと家族がいないので、こういう時、どうすればいいかわからないんです。教えてくれません？

GET FAM-ZONED HAHA aaaaAAAAAA HE SEES YOU AS FAMILY AND HE WANTS TO TREAT YOU THE WAY HE'S SUPPOSED TO TREAT FAMILY. . . . . . ;0; just be yourself jiro we love you as you are, dark and morbid and a little distant but actually quite sweet--

Affinity 25

"There's a high probability that your curse is related to my field of research.

It's a problem for me if you die."

あなたの呪いは、俺の研究分野に関係している可能性が高い。 あなたを死なせるわけにはいかないんですよ

normally i don't share the ones that aren't kind of sweet but like. . .the bluntness and distance in this one is so perfect for Jiro haha ESPECIALLY AFTER THE "I WANT TO TREAT YOU LIKE FAMILY" ONE BEFORE IT. . .he went from being kind of sweet to being like "if you die it'll be a problem." and not even in a tsundere way just 'it matters to me if you die for academic purposes.

Spring

"I'm going to see some flowers on Yuri's orders. Do you want to come? I'll be harvesting mandrakes." 今から佑理の指示で花を見に行くんです。あなたも一緒に行きますか？ マンドラゴラの採取ですが

"Yuri told me to take a break so I'm gonna go work near some flowers i guess."

"Ha ha ha ha! I observed Yuri fighting the urge to fall asleep during class today. Would you like to see the photos?" はははは！ 今日は授業中、ずっと眠気と戦っている佑理を観察してたんですよ。この写真、見ますか？

i really wish it were during the hours this one can play because i wanna record it lolol Jiro smiling and laughing because Yuri's trying not to fall asleep is so precious. Tiny little humanization for our monster boy.

Summer

"Good, today's temperature matches the forecast. I'll be starting a new experiment this afternoon, but the temperature regulation is difficult. It should be fun." 今日の気温は……予報通りですね。 午後から新しい実験の着手をするのに、温度管理が大変で。楽しみです

temperature regulation experiments are fun! i'm glad Jiro enjoys what he does.

"A dare? Okay, I'll do it with you. I've always wanted to try screaming in fear." へえ、肝試しですか。 いいですよ、付き合います。恐怖で叫ぶ経験を、一度くらいしてみたいので

"a dare" isn't really a good translation here--肝試し is a "test of courage", an activity usually done on summer evenings where you go someplace scary with your friends to overcome fear together! Or something like that. It's most often done in summer because that's when it's believed there are more like. . .supernatural occurrences? several other characters' summer lines mention more anomalies in Japan in the summer as a result of these beliefs. Either way it's cute that he's like 'oh. that sounds cool. i hope it'll make me experience fear.' I want him to scream in an exaggerated way, just SHRIEKING for the sake of it, not even because he's really that scared just "this feels like the appropriate situation for screaming :)" lmao

"Ha ha ha ha! Oh, sorry. I tried letting the stag beetles I caught for an experiment fight, and it was funnier than I expected." はははは！　ああ、すいません。 採取の時に捕まえたカブトムシ同士を戦わせたら、想像以上に面白くて

i feel like that's something that comes up now and then as like. a thing young japanese boys do. which makes jiro kind of childish in a way which is super charming? it sounds to me like he didn't have much of a childhood. so i'm happy he can explore it now and have fun.

Autumn

"I don't understand why you would go somewhere without a purpose. Why would you go to a mountain if you didn't need to harvest something?" 行楽ですか？　いえ、単純に何が目的か理解できないんです。採取もせず、山を歩くんですか？

mods, show him the beauty of nature.

"I went to the botanical garden to get some ingredients and I was given these yams. Do you like candied yams?" さっき植物園に原料をもらいに行ったらサツマイモをもらったんです。スイートポテトは好きですか？

"A lot of people in Mortkranken dislike exercise.The sporting clubs in Darkwick must be made up of people from other houses." うちの寮は、体を動かすことが嫌いな人が多いですね。学内でスポーツをしてるのも、他寮の人ですよね？

i am once again asking why i was put in fuckin frostheim--

"I read books every day, not just in the fall. I like medical journals best. I don't remember what made me start reading them." 秋に限らず、本は毎日読みますよ。特に医学の専門書は好きですね。 いつからなのかは……忘れました

Winter

"Hurk...! Phew... I'm fine... The change in temperature between indoors and outdoors this time of year causes my physical condition to deteriorate more frequently." うっ……はあ……大丈夫です……この季節は室内外の寒暖差のせいで体調を崩しやすいので……

i remember someone i followed also gags when going from a cold place to a warm one lmao. . . .

"I found an anomalous plant that can only grow in extremely low temperatures and successfully created a medication with it. It was just a coincidence though." 極低温のみ自生する怪異植物を見つけたので、試しに原薬にしてみたら上手くいきました。まあ、偶然です

'i made a medical breakthrough but it was just an accident' is the medical equivalent of 'i'm not a model'

"Streptococcal infections are on the rise. They're spread through droplet and contact infection. Have you been taking precautions?" 溶連菌の感染が増えてますね。飛沫感染と接触感染が経路になります。 あなた、ちゃんと予防してます？

jiro says WEAR YOUR FUCKIN' MASK.

His birthday

"Whose birthday? Oh, mine? I forgot. Did Yuri leak my medical records?" 誕生日？　誰のです？ ああ、俺のですか、忘れてました。カルテ、佑理が漏らしたんですか？

"did yuri fuckin dox me--"

Your birthday

"Oh, it's your birthday today, isn't it? What should I do? I suppose I'll go to your room later." ああ、あなた今日、誕生日じゃないですか。何をすればいいんですか？ まあ、後でそちらの部屋に行きます

jiro no you don't have to do that you are moving so fast WHAT HAPPENED TO BEING FAMILY WAIT--

Valentine's Day "What's this packet? I can't eat solids. You made it? Oh. I can probably eat some of it then." なんですか？　この包み。俺、固形物は食べれませんけど…… なんだ。あなたの手作りなら少しはいけます

bby if you can't eat it don't make yourself sick with it. . . .

White Day

"Here. An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, something handmade for something handmade. Eat it here and tell me what you think." どうぞ。目には目を、歯には歯を、手作りには手作りをと思いまして。ここで食べて評価を教えてください

April Fool's Day

"Yuri's kicking up a fuss and saying I deceived him? I don't remember doing it. It doesn't matter though." 佑理が、俺に騙されたって騒いでるんですか？　そんなことしましたっけ。 まあ、どっちでもいいですけど

i wonder if he actually pulled a prank and he's just hiding it really well. . .or if Yuri is just paranoid lol Yuri's for the record:

"Hmph, did you honestly think you could fool me? I won't fall for your cheap tricks. I've already been fooled by Jiro seven times today!" ふんッ。貴様も僕を騙すつもりで？その手には乗りません。今日はすでに、次郎くんに７回騙されたのでね

Halloween

"I don't know much about Halloween. I can't eat candy though, so I have to play a trick on you, right?" ハロウィン？　よく知りませんが、俺、お菓子は食べれないので。 あなたに悪戯すればいいんですよね

Christmas

"This tree? It's a fir tree. Yuri told me to get one, so I cut it down and carried it back here. My special artifact doesn't cut very well."

この木ですか？　佑理に言われて、モミの木を切って持ってきました。俺の特質怪具、切れ味が悪いんです

THERE WE GO. sorry that one took so long!! He's actually a bit of aq goof but his no-affinity lines make him come off as extra cold and cruel. He just has to get used to you!! But I think it has a very charming contrast. AFTER THIS IS JIN! Tomorrow night maybe? it's almost midnight and i have to wake up early again and my insomnia kicked my ass last night. . . .

#jiro kirisaki #tokyo debunker #tokyo debunker spoilers #danie yells at tokyo debunker

[bakuhatsufallinlove]

Hello, have you seen the latest ch of MHA 423? Is it true that bkdk really killed kurogiri? How do you feel about shigaraki dying in the end and deku reaction towards it? Sorry for asking too many questions but I really can't stand those bkdk killed kurogiri allegations and your metas of bkdk are really good.

Anon, I'm gonna be honest with you. My feelings can be summed up as follows:

Stuff like this is the reason you don't see me posting reactions every chapter. Jokes and conspiracy theories and "omg what if" posts are all in good fun, but every week, some people talk like this is The Absolute Last Word on every plot line even vaguely referenced in the chapter.

And I don't get it at all. When I'm reading the new chapters, the most I can tell you is that I have fun and I find it interesting. I'm engaged. I'm curious to see what comes next and how it's gonna pan out. I definitely have my own thoughts, feelings, and hopes! But I put them in a little stasis box of anticipation, ready for when I can find out more.

So when people lose their shit over something, it just feels so unnecessary to me. Especially something that happens right at the very end of the chapter, because more often than not that's the jumping off point for the next installment, as opposed to a cut-away to a different scene.

How many times have we gotten a cliff-hanger or shocking ending to a chapter, only for the very next chapter to reverse the event or reveal we were misled about its meaning? How many times has that happened in this very scene?

The reason I can write thousands of words analyzing Deku vs. Kacchan 2 is because it's over. The entire event is complete. Maybe there will be future chapters that reference it or inform our view of it, but it's done. This final arc isn't done--hell, this scene isn't even remotely done!

Furthermore, I am of the opinion that people saying bkdk killed Kurogiri probably don't like Izuku or Katsuki to begin with, so I really don't think anything out of my mouth is going to persuade them one way or the other. And I'm certainly not going to waste my breath trying to argue about something we'll have an answer for in like, two weeks.

Ongoing series thrive on making you want to know what happens next. Me personally, I'm having a good time wanting to know what happens next.

I guess the only thing I want to ask the people making these claims is: Why do you read mha like you're waiting for it to upset you? Why are you expecting this series to disappoint you?

The answer isn't for my benefit, just so you know.

#asks #anon asks #mha spoilers #mha manga spoilers #I feel for you anon #every week I'm like #I WANNA ROCK AND ROLL ALL NIGHT!!! #AND PARTY EVERY DAY!! #while apparently droves of other people are having the worst time of their lives??? #to be clear I am not rocking and rolling over character death #I am simply enthusiastically and sincerely enjoying the ride this story is giving me #sometimes that involves sadness!!! #whomst among us has not cried in the club

[marunalu]

I saw many people people now who claim that DFO disproved because AFO doesn't show any affection to his son.

Also they claimed that Dekus dad could be a hero in America and he was sent to Japan now so we will see him.

What do you think about that?

Dfo is debunked as soon as the manga ends and we have the 100% confirmation that there isnt any connection between hisashi and afo. Not sooner not later. What a lot of people dont seem to grasp is that dfo is in the first place not about afo loving izuku. Dfo is about the theory that afo is izukus biological father. He can be his father without loving him. There are millions of parents out there in the real world who sadly give a wet fuck about their children. Afo loving his family is just one of multible interpretations and hopes people have for the theory. There are a lot of dfo fans out there who never believed afo cared for izuku. Dfo is about afo being izukus father and not if he loves him or not. Fans have just different headcanons how it could turn out.

I said it already in the past. I dont believe that izukus father is a hero working in america. America is the country with the most heroes worldwide, so WHY should a japanese hero work for a different hero government then his own and most importantly not even come home ONCE or mentioned ONCE by his hero obsessed son in the whole story? Not even when he was about to get killed by muscular? Why should hisashi not come home for christmas, new year, izukus and inkos birthday etc. If he is just a hero working outside of japan (which makes no sense anyway). And WHY should hori refuse to talk about hisashi if he is just a hero working in an other country who has no importance to either the plot nor to izukus character? If hisashi is a hero working in america and NOW comes back after the war is already won by the japanese heroes this would be the biggest asspull hori could come up with. The only way I could see hisashi as a hero is if he is also connected to afo. We know that afos presence is huge WORLDWIDE! It was stated he has his hands in almost EVERY country! And we saw that he is quite "popular" in america.

I have seen a few people talk about how hori will use some deux ex machine to bring tomura back to life and that he is just scaring people with the most horrible and dissapointing outcome he could come up with. I dont trust hori enough to pull something like that off, but on the other side he is the man who brought bakugou back from the dead in the most ridiculus and stupid way possible so who knows what he is ready to come up with.

But to come back to the main point: dfo is only then debunked when we got the last chapter of the manga and its to 100% confirmed hisashi isnt afo. Because we are talking about a man who can change his appearance, change his dna, can have any quirk he wants, is known for planning ahead should the 10 different plans of the other 25 different plans he planned for 15 different scenarios fail and who spends time with a mad doctor who was not only in posession of a clone quirk, but also is able to make copys of every quirk he gets his fingers on.

The only advice I can give dfo fans is to wait and not to read any anti dfo posts and get worried for maybe no reason. Just wait till the manga is done and THEN you can complain as much as you want!

#bnha #bnha spoiler #bnha all for one #bnha dad for one

[cinnamongorll]

a fragile line - chapter 33

read on ao3! (153k words) | previous chapter | masterlist

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female OC

Series tags: extreme slow burn, age gap, older man/younger woman, protective joel, jealous joel, hurt/comfort, pov third person, mutual pining, angst, sexual tension, friends to lovers, canon-typical violence, feral joel, parental abuse, eventual smut.

Series synopsis: three years ago, Juliet escaped her father's religious survivor camp, ending up in the Boston QZ. Juliet created a life for herself in Boston, desperate to forget the trauma of her upbringing. One day, Juliet arrives home to find a mysterious letter which forces her to return to her home town. Juliet can't travel the harsh post-apocalyptic landscape alone, so she enlists the help of the grumpy and, at times, frightening man she works alongside: Joel Miller.

Warnings: animal death. threats of cannibalism. gore.

Word count: 6.4k

Chapter 33

Juliet’s POV:

Juliet hadn’t noticed the men who clung to the side of the building like dark moss. She didn’t see the sight that had made Joel pause. But Juliet saw, with the harshest of clarity, the back end of the shotgun as it assaulted Joel’s temple.

Mouth open in a silent display of horror, Juliet watched as his body crumpled to the ground like paper in a tight fist. 

The self preservation that guided her for many years and protected her like a sure compass was nowhere to be found. She didn’t look to her left to find Joel’s attacker. She didn’t even raise her gun, instead, it slipped through her fingers and hit the ground with a sound that never reached her ears.

Juliet didn’t hear herself scream for him but she felt her lips form his name.

Why wasn’t he listening to her? Why wasn’t he moving?

Her skin was numb by the time the first man touched her skin, gripping her wrists and roughly pulling them behind her body before a rope enclosed around them again, again, blocking her blood flow. But Juliet felt nothing. The men around her didn’t exist. They couldn’t exist, because if they did, and that rope around her wrists was real too, then that meant that Joel… that Joel…

No, no no no NO. 

“Get up, Joel,” Juliet demanded, her voice hard, mimicking his past commands. “Get up,” she continued when he still didn’t move, louder this time. “Get up. Get up. Get up. GET UP,” Juliet begged.

She tried to drop to her knees, tried to crawl to him. But the men around her had hands under her arms, keeping her upright. Juliet just writhed and bared her teeth, seething like a woman possessed.

Why wouldn’t they let her crawl to him?

Through her burning vision, Juliet watched in cold, biting horror as hands were shoved under Joel’s arms and his motionless body was lifted into the air.

She was screaming again then his feet began to drag against the ground. 

Why wasn’t he moving? Why wasn’t he moving? Why wasn’t he -

Juliet couldn’t breathe, she couldn’t think, she couldn’t feel anything beyond stunned terror.

Take me with him! She wanted to scream. And maybe she did scream it. Maybe she couldn’t stop screaming.

Sharp heat and a welcome numbness hit her cheek. Too slowly, Juliet’s head tilted towards the hand that slapped her. Her eyes widened when she realised that she knew the man the hands belonged to. Juliet scrambled her confused mind for his name as recognition flared within her. The man had become almost synonymous with her father when she was young; he watched her from corners and lingered in open doorwards as her father hurt her. And he was always first in line when her father opened their game up to other players. 

John, Juliet remembered. 

“What’re you doing back here, Juliet?” John’s sneering voice asked as the hand that slapped her now gripped her chin, tilting her chin up to meet his face. 

Through her hazy mind, she felt his breath coat her cheek and she blinked up at his, too thin, face. 

“Don’t care who she is, pick her up and let’s go,” a voice called from behind them. 

John’s cracked lips spread into a bloody smile before he pulled her even closer until his lips met her ear. 

“You might’ve been something in this town once, sweetheart,” he murmured, causing Juliet's already broken and pounding heart to jump. “Do you know what you are now?” he asked as he pulled back to meet her wide stare. 

John’s eyes roamed down her body before he answered. 

“Fresh meat.” 

……………..

They dragged Juliet through the gate, passing the corpse of the horse that had carried them here. 

Its hollowed body told her what fate awaited her. 

Her head whipped around. She couldn’t see Joel. Juliet began to scream his name in a guttural cry. She thought that if she yelled enough it might wake her from his nightmare. 

God, they must have been watching them since they entered the town. 

Joel had questioned Danny for looking over his shoulder but that’s what they should have been doing. Maybe they had grown too comfortable in Jackson, had forgotten the habit all together. 

The tall gate that protected the town had been open. Why had it been open? The question had plagued Juliet’s mind as they had searched for Danny. 

Only now, as she was dragged through the same streets, did the answer reveal itself like the solution to an old riddle…

What does a starving town, in the midst of winter, with a dead leader, and no contacts or suppliers need most? 

Fresh meat. 

It was a trap, the open gate had been a snare and they had walked right into it. 

It wasn’t supposed to be like this. Juliet just wanted to know if she was destined to her father’s fate, if his blood had truly corrupted her.

Stupid, fucking selfish suicidal mistake. 

Joel was right, he was always right, and yet he still came with her…

And now he was … and now he …

“Joel!” The scream erupted from Juliet’s raw throat. 

“Shut her up, will you?” One of the men she only vaguely recognised groaned from behind her. 

“It’d be my fucking pleasure,” another one said before the back end of a gun sped towards the side of her head. 

…………………………….

Her bed was so cold that the feeling bit through her layers of clothing. 

Juliet groaned, trying to turn over away from the chill, but her body wouldn’t follow her commands. 

Juliet’s eyes flashed open to a ceiling that she didn’t recognise. Her mind was foggy and the world was still blurry as Juliet blinked a few times and tried to raise a hand to rub at her eyes. But she couldn’t move her arm, why couldn’t she move her arm? 

Her memories barreled into her like another hit to the temple. 

Joel. 

Juliet’s pulse began to roar in her ears as she remembered what had happened and she realised where she was. 

She couldn’t move her arms or legs, and it wasn’t a bed she was lying on.

Juliet was strapped to a metal table in what looked like Ethan’s father’s old medic office. 

The room had always been kept immaculate when Ethan’s father was alive, but now every surface was overflowing with dirty rags, containers and knives which all had a slick red coating to them which made Juliet’s stomach drop. 

She remembered their horse. 

“Fresh meat,” John had called her. 

Juliet swallowed down her nausea as she tilted her head the best she could to see the floor. 

It was stained with blood. 

This wasn’t an examination table anymore… It was a butcher’s block. 

Despite the chill, a sweat broke out across her forehead. She tried to think of a strategy to get out but all she could think about was Joel. 

Where was he? How long had she been out for? … Was he alive? 

The door opened so suddenly, Juliet didn’t have time to wipe the horrified look from her face.

It was John. He looked the same as he did in the dark memories of her childhood, except he was now a lot thinner, like Danny. Lost leadership and the effects of winter had hit this town hard. 

He opened his mouth but Juliet spoke first. 

“Where is he?” she demanded in a voice far stronger than she felt. 

John shook his head slowly, and walked to pull a chair over to the table she lay on.

“Slow your horses, sweetheart. You’re not the one asking questions here,” he warned as he sat down and rested his hands on his knees.

“Where is he?” Juliet bit out, ignoring him. 

John laughed and leaned back in his chair. 

“So you’ve come back, and with Elijah’s killer, no less,” he observed with a quizzical look. “I was out on a supply run when your father was murdered. Knew he was looking for you, though. Just didn’t expect you to betray us, Juliet.” 

She swallowed down the fear that was crawling up her throat.

“God, what a disappointment you were to him,” John sighed. “Your father gave you everything, he saved you and yet you brought that monster straight to him.” 

Juliet’s heart was pounding so hard in her chest it was difficult to hear John’s voice. 

“When I came back, they told me that Elijah was murdered by this crazy man and I -” John paused, shook his head and clasped his hands in front of him. “I vowed that I’d get revenge, one way or another but keeping this town alive became more important.” He rubbed a hand over his face and barked out a surprised, almost delighted laugh. “And then you walk right in, like you own this fucking town and with the psychopath himself. It’s just perfect, couldn’t have wrote it better myself.” 

Juliet began to shake her head. “We don’t want any trouble,” she promised. 

John tilted his face to the side, to match her position on the table, and looked deep into her eyes. 

“Oh we’re way past that now, sweetheart,” he said almost softly as his eyes roamed down her restrained body. “All you are is trouble.” 

Juliet squeezed her eyes shut until she saw stars. She couldn’t see a way out of this, she couldn’t even begin to make a plan because her mind was playing a constant loop of Joel’s body crumpling to the ground. Juliet analysed it over and over. Did she see him breathing? Could he have survived this? 

“Where is he?” she pleaded. 

John stood so suddenly that Juliet flinched. He pushed his chair back with a biting shriek and walked over to the counter. 

“He’s no concern of yours now. You brought him right to us, sweetheart,” John replied with his back turned as he fiddled with something on the counter. “You didn’t think we’d want to have a little chat with the man who killed Elijah and left us all to starve?” 

Hope slammed into Juliet’s chest, fast and sudden. 

“He’s alive?” she choked out. Her eyes began to flood with tears and they leaked onto the cold metal table beneath her. 

John turned suddenly, resting his back on the counter, as his lips pulled into a smile that didn’t reach his eyes.

“You really do care about him, don’t you?” He scoffed, then shook his head. “How the mighty have fallen.” 

Juliet said nothing, just bit her lip to stop another scream from erupting. 

He’s alive. He’s alive. He’s alive. 

“Why’d you come here, Juliet?” John demanded, turning his head to the side. The action made him look menacing, and Juliet remembered that she should be afraid of him, not just because of what he might do to Joel, but what he might do to her. 

“We want nothing from you,” she bit out as she struggled against the restraints. Juliet was growing restless, and her breathing grew laboured as she realised there wasn’t an easy way out of this. 

She was entirely at John’s mercy; whatever his revenge may include. 

“Just let us go,” Juliet pleaded as the ropes that bound her scratched red welts into her skin. 

John’s look stretched several moments as he watched her struggle, then he reached for something behind him that Juliet couldn’t see from the angle she lay at. 

“No,” he replied quietly as he began to walk towards her, his footsteps slow and careful as though he were approaching a wild beast. “No, this is just too good. You took everything from us,” John’s voice had grown darker. “Your father was a proud man and he provided for us, kept us from starvation every winter… now you’ll have to fulfil that duty.” 

Juliet’s stomach dropped as she noticed what was in his hand. The stark overhead lights reflected off the sharpened edge of the cleaver. 

“Wait,” she begged and begged and begged. 

Juliet’s eyes widened as John’s steps paused. Her entire body trembled as he raised her knife and its mirrored surface reflected her horror stricken face. 

This couldn’t be the end. She couldn’t die here. 

Juliet had survived this town, she had survived her father, and now…

“Elijah was against this practice, said it was against the word of God,” John murmured in a voice that sounded underwater to Juliet’s ears.

“Wait!” She pleaded again, her own voice almost unrecognisable in her state of terror. 

John ignored her.

“But I think under the current circumstances, he’d understand.” 

Juliet writhed against her restraints, pushing further against the metal table, wanting to melt into the surface if only to get away from the cleaver now angled dangerously over her body.

“You don’t have to do this,” she screeched. “We have food in our bags, you can have it, you can have it all.” 

John’s eyes hit the ceiling. “Don’t worry, sweetheart, we got that already.” 

The cleaver dropped to her stomach and Juliet’s eyes squeezed shut.

But the blade didn’t pierce her skin. Instead, John used the pointed edge to trace along her jacket, watching as it formed a perfect slash in the fabric. 

Nausea washed over her as she pictured what the blade would do to her skin. 

“It’s just not enough,” John continued with a click of his tongue.

Her knife was in her boot, if it was even still there. But there was no way for her to get to it. She was entirely defenceless. All the years of fighting and bleeding and learning how to defend herself and, in her final moments, it still wasn’t enough. 

Her mind went to Joel. If he was gone already then at least she would join him, wherever they ended up. 

In her sweetest fantasies, she’d always imagined they would find a farmhouse, like the one he had described almost a lifetime ago, and live together. They might sit on a porch swing in the evenings and watch as the sun set, then they would walk up the stairs to the bed they shared and fall asleep in each other’s arms. 

Maybe in another life, she thought. 

Juliet’s mind tuned back into reality and John’s voice filtered back through. 

Despite the fear and the adrenaline that was pumping through her bloodstream, Juliet frowned as she watched, through tear soaked eyes, as John moved the cleaver away from her chest and, with his other hand, he gripped her wrist. 

“We’ll start with something small, see how you manage,” John explained, coldly. 

John winced as Juliet’s scream began to fill the room, echoing off every surface. Her throat burned and raged. 

He struggled to grip her flailing hand but a quick elbow to her gut paused all her movements. 

“This is for Elijah,” John seethed.

Then he brought the cleaver down on her finger, slicing through the bone until it was no longer attached to her body. 

Black spots filled her vision immediately and Juliet’s scream vanished at the first flash of pain. 

Then there was nothing at all. 

……………………………….

“Juliet.”

“Juliet.” 

Her eyes opened, then immediately closed again.

The lights were so bright and something was on fire, but she couldn’t figure out what.

“Juliet, please wake up.” 

The voice wouldn’t stop harassing her, it was like a hand had reached through her mind and was dragging her subconscious out of the dark waters up to the surface.

Panic hit her with the first gasp of air. 

“Joel?”

Her eyes searched frantically through her tears as her head bent in different directions, desperately trying to find who had pulled her back to life. 

“No, it’s me. It’s Danny.”

To her left, there he was, crouched against the table, shaking Juliet’s shoulders. 

“Danny?” she asked. 

“Listen, we don’t have much time,” he cautioned, letting go of her shoulders.

“Where is he? Is he alive? Please,” Juliet’s questions poured from her, the words overlapped and sleep still clung to her slurred speech. 

“Don’t move, I need to wrap your finger,” Danny whispered, avoiding her questions.

My finger? 

Juliet had discovered the source of the thick, burning pain and she remembered the glint of satisfaction in John’s eyes. 

She tried to lift her hand to her face, to see if it was really gone, but she still couldn’t move her arms. The restraints still held her to the table. 

“Untie me. I - I can’t move,” Juliet croaked, her throat raw. 

Danny just shook his head and lifted her injured hand, still restricted by the binding on her arm. 

Juliet watched with her mouth open in a silent scream as he began to wrap a bandage over the stump of what was left of her finger and around the palm of her hand, over and over until he tied it tight. 

Her breathing bordered on hyperventilating as she struggled to not pass out again. 

When the job was done, Danny lay her hand by her side and took a step backwards, making no move to untie her.

“Please, untie me. I have to get to him,” Juliet almost sobbed, her voice confused and desperate. 

Danny shook his head again, quicker this time, as though he was ashamed. 

“I can’t. There’s no time,” he replied quietly. 

“What do you mean? Where’s John?” Juliet demanded as her eyes flashed to the closed door.

Danny ran a shaking hand, covered in her blood, over the sharp bones of his face. “He’ll be back soon. He went to Joel,” he revealed reluctantly. 

Juliet’s chest ached as the restraints bit through her clothing. “Do you know where they’re keeping him?” she begged. 

“You shouldn’t have come back here,” Danny sighed, then nodded to the table she lay on. “That night you were last here, I found you on this table. You were unconscious and Ethan was patching you up while Joel hovered over your body like he’d shoot anyone who came near you,” Danny paused and let out a humourless laugh, “he almost shot me, actually.” 

“When he carried you got of here, I thought that, despite everything he’d done, that at least he’d protect you, that maybe you’d have a chance at a life,” Danny said solemnly, staring down at his feet, refusing to meet her eyes. 

“Untie me,” Juliet commanded, her voice angry. 

Danny stood so still, it was as though he hadn’t heard her at all, then he turned and looked behind him at the door. He was terrified, she realised. Maybe if they hadn't come to the town, it would have been Danny on this table instead of her. 

Then he broke the silence, with words sharper and more ruinous than the edge of John’s cleaver: 

“Elijah wasn’t lying to you.”

Juliet’s heart stopped. 

Danny sat in the empty chair, left behind by John, and dropped his head into his hands. And when his face rose to meet hers, his eyes were glossy with unshed tears. 

“You were born not far from here, we all were,” he began. “I was younger than your parents, but I knew them well. I was the son of the town minister and they came to our church, the whole town did, really. I was there at your parents’ wedding and your christening.”

His words didn’t feel real. Juliet could have sworn she was asleep again, floating in her fantasies. 

“You were such a happy toddler, you know, you were always smiling,” Danny smiled too, like the memory was clear in his head, until his face darkened. “Then the end of the world happened,” he said grimly, wringing his hands, “and nothing was ever the same.” 

“It was a small town and those of us who weren’t infected, we banded together in the church. There were some supplies there and, for a while, we managed.” His voice was quieter now. “Then, a few weeks in, we heard a knock at the door. We knew by that point that the infected didn’t knock, so we opened the door and,” Danny paused to meet Juliet’s eyes, “Elijah was on the other side, with his daughter.”

Juliet swallowed roughly, and her heart jumped at the mention of his name. 

“He’d always lived in town with his wife, and their daughter was about your age. They always kept to themselves, they came to church but never stayed long afterwards,” Danny explained. “It was a surprise to see them, to say the least. Especially because they were covered in blood and his wife was gone.”

A chill settled over Juliet’s body, sinking deep into her bones.

“We checked them for bites and we let them stay and Elijah I guess slowly took up the role as the leader of our group. He was skilled and he knew how to appeal to people,” Danny paused to run a hand through the greasy strands of his thinning, grey speckled hair. “Then… then his daughter was killed.”

Juliet’s breath caught in her throat. 

“It was a freak accident. The church was swarmed and so many survivors were bitten, including his daughter.” His eyebrows furrowed, as he considered his next words. “I watched him kill her. A bullet straight between her eyes. She was only three.” 

Tears hit the metal table. 

Danny stretched his back and nervously looked around him at the door as though John would walk in at any moment, then he turned back to Juliet. “Things are hazy in my mind after that,” he stated. “We moved out of the church, Elijah had found us an abandoned farm with some good land, and we started hunting for food.” 

“Your parents were strong, and brave. They volunteered to hunt and I didn’t notice it at first but Elijah started to spend more and more time with them, and more time with you. It seemed like a man grieving his daughter and no one really paid any mind but, I don’t know, it was almost possessive.” 

Danny’s story unravelled like an old ball of tangled string, bringing more troubles with every pull. 

“I don’t know how it happened. I wasn’t there, but your father went on a supply run… and only Elijah returned.”

Juliet bit her lip hard and a sharp metallic taste entered her mouth. She swallowed it down.

“Your mother was… I’ve never heard anyone scream like that. Elijah said your father had been bit and he had to kill him but,” Danny shrugged. “Your mother died not long after.”

“No,” Juliet whispered, not realising the word had left her mouth. It was too much to take in. Her whole world was unravelling.

“She had taken you down to the river to bathe but hours later, neither of you had returned. Elijah eventually found you, sitting on the riverbank, alone with your mother’s jacket draped over you.”

Juliet couldn’t feel the pain of her severed finger anymore. She was numb with a loss of people she couldn’t remember, but had offered her a love that had been taken from her. 

“He said that she drowned herself on purpose,” Danny’s voice cracked. “But your mother would have never left you alone.” 

A sob worked its way up Juliet’s throat but she didn’t let it out. Danny wasn’t finished. 

“Elijah took you in straight away. You even looked like his daughter,” he winced. “I - no one could even question it. People worshipped him, and if we wanted to live, we had to go along with it.” 

Juliet tried to speak but her voice was muted. She coughed out a weak sound and then tried again. 

“What were they like, my parents?” she asked quietly.

At her question, Danny’s hollow eyes found some life again. 

“They were good people, Juliet,” he tried to smile. “Truly good. They were kind and they loved you so much. They were nothing like him.”

Juliet let out the sob this time, she couldn’t hold it in anymore. 

“Why did no one tell me? Why did you all let him hurt me?” she asked like a confused child.

Danny held the bridge of his nose with his thumb and index finger, wincing. “I was a coward. We all were.” He let go of his nose and his eyes locked on the ropes around her body. “I still am.” 

“No,” Juliet gasped out as she began to write against her restraints again. “No, you can get me out of here, just hand me a knife. Please.”

Danny shook his head slowly. “He’ll kill me.” 

“Elijah’s dead,” Juliet said forcefully, the words still felt unreal to her. “You don’t have to be afraid anymore.” 

Danny still didn’t look up at her. 

“Don’t let someone else dictate your life for another twenty years,” she ground out. “Come on, please.You owe me this,” Juliet seethed. 

Danny’s eyes flashed to hers. His mouth opened and for a split second, Juliet saw him make a decision, and watched him begin to speak the words and then - 

The door flew open, banging against the wall with a sound that made Danny jump from his chair. 

“What the hell are you doing here?” John demanded as his hard gaze bounced between Juliet, still bound to the table, and Danny, now standing in front of him. 

To his credit, Danny didn’t flinch. “Just came to check on her,” he explained. 

“Yeah?” John asked, tilting his head to the side. “And who fucking told you to do that?” 

“I’m leaving,” Danny said as he tried to move around John to the door. 

“No you’re not,” John protested with a heavy hand on his chest, pushing him towards the table Juliet lay on.

“Do you wanna be the one on the table?” John demanded, then laughed sickly when Danny didn’t answer. “Yeah, didn’t think so.”

John’s hand pushed him again, until Danny practically leant against the table. 

Juliet stared at Danny’s back, desperately avoiding eye contact with John lest he take another finger as retribution. 

Her eyes were focused on Danny’s thin, hunched shoulders until a flare of light caught her eye. She looked down… there was a knife in Danny’s back pocket. Her knife. The blade was open and ready. 

He’d brought it for her, despite not having the courage to give it to her himself.

Maybe there was some bravery left in him. 

Juliet tuned out John’s anger fueled words as he fired them at Danny and she started to inch her hand towards the knife. The pain from her missing finger was stronger than she’d expected and Juliet had to bite down on her lip again to stop a scream from escaping. 

Her remaining fingers inched closer and closer to the knife until finally they enclosed around the blade. Its sharp edge cut into her flesh, forcing Juliet to bite her lip even harder, and every time she thought she gained a grip… it slid from her fingers again. 

She was losing time. John was going to kick Danny out any second… or worse. She had to get this knife now. 

Ignoring the bite of the blade, Juliet tugged with all the strength she had remaining in her butchered hand and the knife finally slid free. She grasped it carefully, terrified that it would drop onto the metal table. 

John continued his power trip, pointing vile accusations Danny’s way. Juliet tuned him out again and focused on turning the blade in her trembling hand until the sharp edge grazed the rope around her wrist. 

Sweat began to bead across her forehead despite the temperature in the room as the knife threatened to slip from her hand. Without her index finger, gaining a good grip was impossible but she kept trying until the blade cut through the first fibres of the rope. 

John had Danny by the throat now but his body was still covering the movement of her hand as she pushed the knife harder and faster, slicing the rope again and again and again. 

Then, as Danny was pushed against the counter, and a gun was pressed to his head, the rope released from her wrist. 

Juliet choked out a strangled gasp as she rapidly assessed the situation around her.

Danny was shouting at John, with words that her panicked mind couldn’t comprehend.

John’s back was turned, this was the distraction she needed.

With her hand freed, Juliet pushed down the pain and used the knife to cut through the rope on her other wrist, faster this time with her returned mobility. 

John landed a punch on Danny’s face, causing him to sag against the counter. 

Juliet’s eyes flashed towards him but she had to keep working. The knife was at the rope around her chest then finally the rope around her legs. 

Time slowed to a crawl as she lifted her numb legs and managed to drop onto the floor. She stumbled but caught herself on the metal table with her damaged hand.

She couldn’t help it. Juliet yelled out in pain.

John whirled towards her, gun in hand. Juliet’s breath caught in her throat as her eyes widened. 

“No, you don’t,” he growled and stepped towards her, aiming to grab her by the middle. 

But, despite the shock, Juliet was ready. As he reached for her side, Juliet whipped her arm around until her knife lodged in his shoulder then she pulled back, unleashing it with a spray of blood.

“Fuck,” he shouted, stumbling back as his free hand rose to cover the fresh wound.

Juliet eyed the door, fueled by adrenaline and the desperate, searing need to find Joel. But unfortunately John handled a stab wound better than Juliet expected, because within seconds he had his gun pointed at her head. 

Despite the adrenaline in her bloodstream, the injury and the lack of food and water had taken its toll. Juliet’s hands rose in the hair as her body began to sway. 

“You really are trouble, aren’t you?” John sneered. 

In her desperation, Juliet’s eyes flickered to Danny’s, begging him desperately to help her. But Danny had a different idea, quickly he began to mouth a phrase over and over, urging her to understand.

She peered closer, blinking fast as her mind whirled.

Juliet thought he was saying “Elijah’s house.”

She gasped when realisation slapped her across the face. Elijah’s house. That’s where Joel was. He was telling her where Joel was being kept. 

“Don’t look at him,” John interrupted fiercely. “He can’t help you.” 

The sound of the gunshot was so unexpected that Juliet’s hands flew to her ears and her eyes squeezed shut. 

She hadn’t even seen him move the gun in his direction. She hadn't even noticed when he decided to change target.

The gunshot rang in her ears, muting the rest of the world. 

But Juliet could see clearly and her eyes dropped to Danny’s body, now slumped on the floor against the cabinet with a ring of red surrounding his face.

It took a moment for the moment to catch up with her. Juliet felt two steps behind. How did this happen? 

Juliet’s eyes slowly lifted from Danny’s unresponsive body to John’s towering presence, breathing heavy as he watched her reaction. 

“What did you do?” she asked in a voice barely above a whisper. 

“What did I do?” he scoffed. “Get back on the table.” 

Juliet shook her head like an impudent child. 

John rolled his eyes and tucked his gun into his back pocket, then in two strides he was in front of her, gripping her knife from her numb fingers and dropping it on the floor, before he kicked it out the way. 

Then his hands were on her shoulders, roughly pushing her towards the table.

Juliet’s thoughts were too slow and her actions too weak, as the events washed over her in disjointed moments. Danny was dead. Her parents were good people. Joel was still out there. 

Oh god. 

He was still out there. He needed her. 

Juliet twisted her body before her mind realised what she was doing and she pushed with all of her strength against John’s unsuspecting body. 

He stumbled backwards with a frown, then his eyes grew darker and he reached for her again. 

But Juliet was smaller than him, and she knew how to use this to her advantage when men were coming towards her. She ducked immediately, twisting herself under his arm until she stood behind him, breathing heavy, waiting.

She had no plan other than ‘don’t get killed.’ 

Juliet was moving on pure instinct from all her years surviving. John staggered towards her, a snarl taking over his mouth.

Strangely, he didn’t use his gun on her.

He must prefer his meat fresh, she thought. 

An image of herself lying on that table for days on end as body part after body part was hacked off flashed into her mind and Juliet’s body went into overdrive. 

She darted to the side, avoiding John’s outstretched hand.

He was strong but she was quick, and finally, she had a plan. 

The cat and mouse game continued as Juliet steered John towards the counter closest to Danny’s body. 

She was quick but that didn’t matter when she backed herself into a corner. John’s hands found her throat and he squeezed and squeezed as he pushed her into the cabinet behind her. 

His eyes were flaring with sick pleasure as Juliet felt her face turn red with dwindling oxygen.

Panic struck her mind but she didn’t let it linger. Her hands flailed out, as though she were gripping for the counter to hold her weakening body up. But she wasn’t. 

Juliet was searching, searching for the cleaver. 

Black spots appeared in her vision as she finally enclosed her fingers around the wooden handle. Her wrist was still weak from the restraints so she had to tighten her hold before she could swing the makeshift weapon. 

Just as it had sliced off her finger in one fell swoop, the cleaver lodged itself in John’s back like his spine didn’t even exist.

Through her hazy oxygen deprived eyes, Juliet watched John’s mouth form a shocked silent expression before his legs crumpled beneath him… just as Joel’s had. 

At the reminder, Juliet’s hazy vision turned a dark, dangerous red and she drowned out the sound of his gasping whimpers.

Juliet kept her eyes locked on his and she took her time bending to her knees, until she straddled his writhing body. 

The cleaver was high in the air before she had even committed to her act. Then she dropped it down. 

The spray of blood splattered against her face like a hot shower after a cold day. 

In the back of her mind, Juliet thought of Elijah and the cruelty that was housed within his body. With every slash of the cleaver as she brought it down again and again on John’s already butchered stomach, Juliet wondered if it was already too late for her. If Elijah’s sickness had found its way into her bloodstream despite their lack of relation. 

But he had no claim to her, he never had. She wasn’t destined to be locked in that basement, she wasn’t destined to be tortured every day of her childhood, she wasn’t even destined to turn out like him.

Juliet had parents, real parents who loved her. She was supposed to grow up with kind parents and become a kind person, the type of person who forgave and who never lifted a hand against another. 

But that didn’t happen.

And in this world, that girl, the girl she was supposed to be, would have been killed a long time ago. 

Finally, she was free from the curse of her father’s possession and the sick promise of his heritage. Juliet could be her own person, she wasn’t bound to become one thing or another. 

Maybe one day, she might allow herself to be kind and try out a life without bloodshed and violence.

But today wasn’t that day. And, despite everything, Elijah had taught her well. 

For a final time, Juliet would heed his lessons of pain and torture, to save Joel.

To save the man she loved. 

Juliet’s arm ached viciously but she brought the cleaver down a final time, welcoming the blood that dripped down her face. 

As Juliet stood on trembling legs, she stared down at John’s still form and empty chest and realised with a sick satisfaction that he now looked a little like their horse. 

She didn’t bother wiping the blood from her face, Juliet just bent down to collect her knife from where it landed on the floor and tuck it firmly in her boot. Then she dug John’s gun from his back pocket and put it in her own. 

When she walked around the table towards the back door, Juliet forced herself not to look at Danny. He was the last connection to the parents she never knew she had. And now he, too,  was gone. 

In the end, he tried not to be a coward, and maybe there was some forgiveness in Juliet afterall. 

The backdoor opened easily. John had a lot of trust in the ropes that bound her to the table. 

The winter sun was bright in the sky when she opened the door, and Juliet blinked several times as her brain processed the change from the artificial lighting. 

She started walking in the direction of the house where almost every scar on her body was formed. Her legs were weak and she kept stumbling but that didn’t stop her.

Joel had to be alive. Juliet couldn’t even consider a possibility where he wasn’t.

She got him into this fucking mess, and she would get him out.

The desperation poured over her and Juliet was choked by it.

She was going too slow, she had to move faster. Juliet had brought Elijah’s murderer back here and the town wanted its revenge.

But she wouldn’t let that happen. This town owed her, for every blind eye when her blood was spilled, for every silent voice when she begged them for help. 

This town couldn’t have him. 

It had taken her childhood, her innocence, and her faith in humanity.

It wouldn’t take him too.

Juliet started to run, her feet crushing over the frosted grass as she raced across the field. Her loose hair flew around her head, mimicking the thoughts that sped through her mind.

He can’t be gone. He can’t be gone. He can’t be gone.  

-------------------------------

@amyispxnk @casa-boiardi @http-paprika @shotgun-shelby @weeping-werewolf @mysaviorjoelmiller @chlojoceycom @joelmillersblog @socialistmary @orcasoul @ashhlsstuff @caitlynsixxx

-------------------------------

Nearing the last few chapters of this story 😭 I'm going to be so sad when it's done but I'm also just super proud of it. Thanks for reading this far ❤️

#joel miller x original character #joel miller x oc #joel miller x female oc #joel miller x reader #joel miller fic #joel miller angst #ao3 fanfic #joel miller fanfic #joel miller #joel miller hbo #tlou #joel tlou #the last of us #pedro pascal #tlou hbo #joel hbo #the last of us hbo #Spotify

[blanketorghost]

A taste of Something New (Pt. 3)

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5

The new taste is heartbreak, actually <3

This third one was supposed to have the resolution included but I realized this chapter was already 3000 words, also the last part is written in both Azul and Yuu's perspectives so perchance it is best that its separate from this one. Anyways stay tuned for the fourth maybe fifth parts. I may take less than a whole six months this time to write it!

Summary: Against his better judgement, Yuu wants to bring Azul a meaningful souvenir from the scalding sands.

Pairing: Yuu Fujisaki x Azul Ashengrotto (one-sided?), Azul Ashengrotto x Jamil Viper (implied, one-sided)

Timeline: During/Post Al'ab Narya and Ch. 4. Pre Ch. 5

Notes: Azul may be OOC? Have never been good at writing him convincingly imho

—

With a pep in his step and a nervous smile, Yuu exited the light music club. He'd mulled over it in class, planned his speech during lunch, and agonized over the details after school. He didn't even play anything during club time, even after an eternity of Kalim whining and goading him to join in with the rest of the members.

The light music club was just right across the board game club, and even if he would've spent time in there anyway, today all he could do was anxiously look at the slightly ajar door a few steps away. Would it be too weird if he just came in and gave him the book?

Yeah... definitely.

Honestly, the best option here was to just hand it to him after club session's over. He just needed to casually greet him and give him the book as the guise of a souvenir. He could explain the details later.

But what if he came out with a friend? He didn't really trust on his guts enough to think he could give him the gift then, he'd have to brainstorm new possibilities for encounter.

He clutches the piece tightly against his chest, wrapping paper crinkling to his touch.

"Wat'cha looking at, Yuu-chan?"

Cater's voice takes him out of his trance, rudely interrupting that vicious cycle of what-ifs and but-thens he'd already crafted in his brain about optimal gift-giving times.

"Oh, uhm..." He hides the package under his blazer and looks at the ground, hoping to find a good excuse inside the cracks on the floor. "I needed to ask for Azul's help for something about the gourmet club. I was hoping if I gave him something in return, he might say yes more easily."

"Really? Well, good luck with that." Cater raises an eyebrow and crosses his arms. "I've heard around the grapevine that Azul-kun's been super stingy about creating his famous contracts now. It's a shame. I was totes hoping we could do some sponsorship deal where I advertised the lounge on Magicam for free meals..."

"Huh. I guess he really turned a whole new leaf with that whole..." Yuu trails off as he smiles in spite of himself. He wasn't very sure that that was the reason Azul had stopped, but he could at least pretend maybe he had caused a positive change. A bit of wishful thinking never hurts anybody. "Never mind, I mean- Thanks for the warning. But I think he would be really interested in what I have to offer." He waves Cater off.

"Well, I mean, if you wanna you can use the points I've been saving up at the lounge to get a meeting, I honestly get them mostly for the discounts on seasonal meals, but I don't min-"

"Oh, I already have enough points for a meeting." Yuu takes his loyalty card from his pocket. Usually, he used the points to get some tutoring sessions for Grim or get him a study guide. It was convenient, and Azul's teaching method was the only one that actually worked. Yet, he had decidedly started to save up for a private meeting right before the City of Silk trip. He knew Azul was busy and stingy with his time, but if all other attempts to talk to him failed, he had to at least hear him out If he used his points, right?

"Aw, you're all prepared and everything! Gotta give it to Yuu to always be one step ahead." Cater gives him a smile, then checks his phone and sighs, cheerful demeanor diminishing slightly. "Welp. I gotta go to my dorm now. It's my turn to feed the flamingos. Good luck with your Gourmet Club business stuff!"

"Yeah, thanks." Yuu waves at all the members of the light music club, and, one by one, the classroom was left empty.

It feels like an eternity before the classroom adjacent to him opens its door, and he waits and waits for the students inside to tidy up and put back everything in their shelves until finally, the members of the Board Game Club also say their goodbyes for the day.

He could hear someone ranting inside the classroom to seeminly no one in particular, some students groaning or shaking their heads as they left the room. Some time later, Azul's voice rises through the chatter to retort to that one ranting, most likely. He scans the crowd until he finally sees a white tuft of hair exit from the room, black gloved hand raising to say his goodbyes to the people that were still inside.

He was always so outwardly nice and polite, he really just had a way of charming people, really. If only he used that power of his for better purposes... still, he couldn't deny the fact that that scheming was also attractive. Very much so, in fact. There was a reason why Yuu ended up falling for him so fast, after all.

“Yuu-san?” Yuu doesn't even notice when Azul turns to see him, his eyebrows arching in surprise.

“Ah- Uh– Azul-” He can barely string out a coherent sentence as he scrambles to hide the package behind his back— wait, what was he doing?! “I just… wanted to say hi.”

“Well then, hi.” Azul flashes him a smile. “It's nice to see you. Perhaps we could talk more at length later, though. I have to get the lounge ready for openin-—”

“Wait!”

Oh dear, that came out louder than what he intended.

Yuu clears his throat, taking a second to look down at the floor to compose himself. “Can't you spare a couple of minutes? It won't take long.”

“I'm sorry, Yuu-san. But I need to help Floyd prep the ingredients for today's menu and make sure Jade doesn't tamper with any of them, I'm sure you understand.”

“I see…”

“If you want, though, I could maybe clear up some time later?”

“I was actually hoping we could meet today… If you have time.” It's like Yuu's body was working on its own, completely overriding the script he'd had so carefully prepared. He was supposed to just give him the gift. “I wanted to talk to you about something important.”

Oh dear sevens, now he was making things sound way more serious than needed. Just give him the gift already!

“Ah.” … Did Azul just blush right now? Maybe he was seeing things. “I think I am free, but I'll ask Jade to schedule you.” He purses his lips. “I'll… Send you a text with the details later this evening.”

“Alright.” Yuu holds his breath as he hands Azul the card, who then rips it in half to signify it's been redeemed. “I’ll… Be waiting, then.”

With that, Azul flashes him another small smile and nods.”I’ll see you later, then.”

“Yeah… see you later.” 

Azul gives Yuu a small wave as he walks away, looking back just once to examine him before turning his heel towards the hallway at the left. And when Azul is out of view, he feels his nerves give out just a little bit…

just a little.

...

What... was he thinking?!

In his panic, he had used up what was supposed to be his hail mary. Sure, Azul was a busy guy and maybe he wouldn't be able to talk to him in a couple of days, but the recipe book could wait!

Giving the book to him after club activities was just a first option, he could've come up with others later. Save his points too!

Ugh, he really needed to learn not to blank when being alone with Azul.

~ 

It’s only 5:00 PM when Yuu receives that fabled message from Azul. 6:00 to 7:00 PM.

Huh, he thought meetings were only supposed to last 15 minutes. Perhaps Azul was feeling generous today. He wouldn’t be needing all that time, though.

Still, Yuu felt one hour to prepare was nearly not enough. Now that his initial courage waned after his first failed attempt, all he could feel was a growing pit in his stomach as he got ready. He didn’t want to keep Azul waiting, though. And before he knew it, he was already at the door of Mostro Lounge. Five minutes early, too.

“Good evening, Yuu. Here for your meeting?” Jade bows as he approaches, and Yuu reflexively bows to him as well. “I hope your conversation is productive.”

“Ah… yeah. Is Azul still in a meeting? I can wait if need be.”

“Oh, not really. Azul only accepted your request for today. You’re the only client he’ll be seeing.” Jade gives him a wide, closed-eyed smile. If his aim was to soothe him, it had the exact opposite effect on Yuu, getting a small jolt of adrenaline course through his body when he bares witness to that creepy grin of his. “In fact, you can go in now, if you’d like.”

“... Right.” Yuu slowly nods and starts walking towards the door, allowing Jade to open it for him. It’s not like the VIP lounge was an unfamiliar sight. In fact, he often found himself hanging out with Azul there, doing homework or chatting the afternoon away while Azul filled out some paperwork. It was a pleasant, quiet environment. Something Yuu severely lacked in his daily life.

As soon as the door opens, Azul looks up from his desk and smiles, lowering his right hand and placing his pen down. “Yuu-san. You’re early.” He states, then uses his left hand to gesture at the chair in front of him. “Take a seat. Do you mind if I continue working while we talk?”

“Hi…” Yuu gives his crush a sheepish smile as he walks over, Jade closing the door behind him. As he sits down, he can now feel a paradoxical heat irradiate from his chest. Wasn’t he just feeling chills before? “And no, of course not. Please continue.”

“Thank you. How was your weekend? Jade mentioned that you and some other students went to a festival.”

“Oh, yeah. Kalim-kun invited us to the firelit festival at his hometown. The Silk City at the Scalding Sands.” Yuu explains, trying to get more comfortable in the leather-bound chair. It usually felt so plush, but now he couldn’t seem to find a good, comfortable position. “Viper showed us around town.”

"So I trust you had a pleasant trip, then?" Azul lifts his head up from his papers and flashes another friendly smile.

It took Yuu weeks of careful observation and millions of failed attempts to discern a genuine smile from Azul Ashengrotto. But once he got that first laugh, that first smirk or chortle, he committed it to memory. It wasn't too different from his all-business one— he still crinkled his eyes and kept his mouth shut. But there was a way in which his lips curled outwards too much, and his brows furrowed ever so slightly when he would pretend.

He was glad Azul would naturally smile more around him.

"It was very fruitful," Yuu leaves the package on his lap, and leans forward. He rests his chin on the back of his palm as he glances at Azul's writing. "Can I ask what you're working on today?"

"You can, and I'm just taking some notes after receiving the most recent customer reviews." Azul keeps smiling as he resumes scribbling at the margins of what Yuu can now see are printed out screenshots of some website. "What brings you here today? If you're looking for a position, permanent or temporary, I unfortunately have no spots open right now."

"Pity." Yuu hums as he eyes some of the comments. The amount of hate had certainly decreased in the months after his overblots. "I could help with accounting if you'd like. I used to do that sometimes."

"I've got that covered. I actually quite enjoy doing the math myself." Azul's smile turns into a small smirk. Cute know-it-all pout included. "I really do mean it when I say I have no spots today. It's a shame, though. I do enjoy you being around the lounge."

Right there, Yuu's heart does a flip.

"Thank you. But actually, that's not the only reason I'm coming here today." He would've liked to. If anything, most of Yuu's time was spent thinking up excuses to come to the lounge more often and not become broke in the process, but today was more of a do-shit-and-dip kind of deal. "And I'll preface, I've used my loyalty points for this meeting. So you have to hear me out."

Azul's eyes widen slightly in surprise, and he looks up once again, placing his fishbone pen on its holder. "Ah, right. You did tell me you had something important to tell me.” He purses his lips, and a hint of pink appears on his cheeks once more. “I'm listening."

Yuu has to consciously stop himself from taking a deep breath and betraying his nervousness. Instead, he straightens up and moves his hands to hold the book. "Well, I've been told that you've been looking for ways to freshen up the menu for this coming month, and..."

"If Grim has somehow convinced you to try and pitch me a tuna-themed menu, tell him I'm still not interested." Azul’s expression tenses as he  speaks in a serious tone, but Yuu can't help but snort at the answer.

"No, no. It's not that." Yuu covers his mouth with a hand as he regains his composure. "Has he actually tried to do that? Or— wait, I'm getting off-topic. But it's not Grim nor tuna related, promise."

“He may have once or twice.” He says nonchalantly as he places the papers aside, and, upon hearing Yuu's response, Azul's placid smile returns, and his posture relaxes a bit, crossing his arms. "I'm all ears, then.”

"Well, during my trip to Silk City, I had the opportunity to sample some of the popular dishes," Yuu starts. He'd created this pitch before he even got to writing the recipes down themselves. He knew that, with Azul, he needed to make his offer to actually look alluring— appetizing, even, if he were to even entertain the possibility of a novice cook gifting recipes to him. "And I've found some interesting recipes you might like." Azul opens his mouth to speak, but Yuu quickly starts again. "And before you tell me that I am in no position to pitch you any possible dishes, or that you've already stocked up on Scalding Sands recipe books, I'd like you to take a look at what I've brought first."

He slowly takes the wrapped book from his lap and hands it to Azul with both his hands. It takes Yuu all his self-control to keep his hands from shaking as Azul, now perplexed, and perhaps curious, takes the package and examines it. 

Their hands touch.

Please, for everything that's sacred, please don't let him blush.

Azul stares at it blankly for a few seconds before he takes off the tape that holds the bottom fold of the package together and slides the notebook from its wraps. And as soon as he does, the aroma of various spices strike both their nostrils. Cumin, Saffron, Paprika— all generously donated by the Asim's cooks.

It also strikes Yuu for the first time just how humble the notebook looks compared to the luxurious office. It looked out of place, foreign, and Yuu couldn't help but purse his lips in slight embarrassment. "I... Um..." God, this wasn't the time to start stammering!

"I... Interviewed the staff from Kalim's kitchens... and gathered as many recipes I could find." As Yuu steadies his voice, Azul starts turning the pages. Expression completely unreadable. "Most of these, they told me, were passed down through generations of trial and error, and I- well, I also documented each dish as best as I could."

"The Asims were kind enough to also allow me to sample their spices. Each is paired with a dish, but I made sure to gather enough for you to experiment if you wish to." Yuu's eyes leave Azul's face and look down at the pages, goodness knows he needed to take a break from trying to figure him out if he didn't want to just faint right then and there, and he was already feeling that annoying lump in his throat that threatened another mistake in his speech. "I know it'd be futile to just buy you a recipe book, since you'd probably have many, so I tried my best to gather as many recipes as possible from a variety of sources.... I, um..."

“I can't accept this. I'm sorry."

Yuu's eyes widen as he gains that same blank expression. His words hit him like a truck, and nothing could've softened that punch to his got nor the sense daze he was struck by. "... Huh?"

“I appreciate the effort you put into this, but… if you were strapped for money, you didn't need to get me anything.” A sharp, stinging pang pierces right through his chest, and Yuu feels mouth go dry. His body is somehow tense yet limp, and he just now notices how cold the VIP room is. "Jade probably mustn't have told you. But it's a personal policy of mine not to accept any gifts." Azul's brows furrow, whether it were with pity or sternness Yuu couldn't care to figure out. "Leaves too many loose ends for me to follow, you see."

"... I..." Yuu's left speechless as Azul puts the wrapping paper over the book and nudges it towards him, sliding it over the dark wood desk. "... I don't want anything for it, really." Yuu's voice is drained of any confidence as he meekly whispers, still in shock. "You can even make me sign a contract if you want."

"And as kind as your offer is, I can't make any exceptions." Azul shrugs, and Yuu's heart sinks. His tone isn't even laced with a sense of remorse or pity. It's... completely and utterly calm as he rejects Yuu's work. “Besides, as you've mentioned, I most likely already have the recipes somewhere in my library. Though having them all compiled in one is certainly convenient, I'd rather do so myself.”

"I still want you to have it." He glances down and leaves the book on the desk, untouched, then takes a step back.

“Yuu… It really isn’t─”

"If you don't want it as a gift, then take it... t-then take it as trash or-..." he breathes in, "Anyway. What matters is that it's yours. Throw it away, sell it, I don't care. But it's yours." He tries to act nonchalant, but he can already feel the lump in his throat becoming larger, cutting any air from getting to his lungs.

Why did he even say that?!

Anyways, before Azul can say or do anything else, Yuu simply walks out the VIP Lounge and out of Octavinelle. He pushes out a smiling Jade and ignores a greeting from Floyd. The atmosphere was just so heavy, suffocating. And all in all, Yuu was sure this was the most pathetic he'd acted in front of Azul ever.

And all he could hear was the sound of Floyd's annoyed whine to his brother just as he crossed the mirror portal door.

"Heeeeyyyy~~ what is up with Shrimpy today~??”

#writing stuff #fanfic stuff #twisted wonderland #art stuff #azul ashengrotto #doodles #twst oc #yuu fujisaki #twst azul #twst yuu #azul x yuu #yuu x azul #azuyuu #yuuazu #i said it was one-sided... but is it

[its-in-the-woods]

Down the Rabbit Hole Chapter 6

Chapter one here, two here, three here, four here , five here

Pairing: Walton Goggins x You

Rating/Warning:  As always minor get out.  Little angst, lots of fluff, handholding,kissing, Very Fluffy, Pinch of Angst, Relationship Development, Hurt/Comfort, Older man/ Younger(30s) women, Alternative universe, fictional work (IDK WHY BUT I AM PUTTING IT) Probably more as I go.

Synopsis: Working in film as a make-up artist is hard enough, but then Walton Goggins requests you, well it's way too easy to fall down the rabbit hole.

Note: they are both single, all for fun.

I think I may have an ending now. Posts will continue to be 2-3k long. Every other day more than likely. The whole fic will be around 30k words.

Thank you all again and again for taking the time to read the stories I put out.

***

Your phone hasn’t stopped buzzing, your head is a little fuzzy but not nearly as bad as you’d experienced. Opening your eyes you flip the phone over to see it’s nearly twelve-thirty in the afternoon. Blinking a few times you make yourself sit up in bed flipping your phone on to see a deluge of text messages. Groaning you turn your phone off and stretch. Before any messages were answered you need coffee and maybe a shower. 

Showered and suitably caffeinated you finally flip open the text messages. 

Trevor: 

9 am: So what happened?

9:1 5:Hello?

9:30: Look do I need to call the police?

10:30: It’s been hours….

10:32: You never texted me when you got home

11:01: Okay it’s after eleven. You never sleep in. 

12:45: I am coming over in thirty minutes if I don’t hear from you. 

You reply:

I am fine, I just got home super late. I hope you’re not coming over

Trevor:

You scared me! 

Why didn’t you text me back?

How late were you out

Wait did you go back to his place?????

You groan squeezing your eyes close and drinking a healthy swig of coffee.

You: 

We went for sushi, then went down to the beach. 

Trevor:

That’s all you're giving me! What kinda 1950s dating scene is this?

You chuckle replying:

We stayed at the beach until 3 am. 

Trevor: Wait did you have sex on the beach

You:

TREVOR! 

Trevor:

It’s an important question. Don’t want to find out on the gossip train.

You:

why can’t I have nice things TREVOR. No there was no sex in PUBLIC, we kissed and held hands. Can I not do that????

Trevor: Are you secretly asexual? There is nothing wrong with that. I think it’s romantic. 

You:

I am going to become asexual if it means you stop asking me these questions. 

You could almost hear him laughing at you. 

Trevor:

You like it! 

You snorted and switched messages.

Walton: 

10 am: Hey beautiful, wanted to check in. See how you’re doing this morning. 

11 am: I was wondering about maybe going out to bar a city over next Friday? 

11:10 am: Promise I am not trying to kidnap you.

12:20 pm:  Thought you never slept in?

You:

Hey handsome, sorry I actually slept in. Kept me out past my bedtime.

I would love to go out with you next Friday, fingers crossed they don’t keep us late

You set your phone down, pondering if you still trusted the milk in the fridge to make pancakes. Getting up you get a refill of coffee, phone buzzing. 

Walton: 

If they do we can always go out saturday? Can’t be keeping you up so late. Got make sure you can keep up with this old man. 

You:

Oh I am sure I can keep up with you 😉

Walton:

Careful little lady, I might have to come by and test that theory.

Your face goes bright red and that heat coils low in your belly. 

You: Promises, promises, 

Walton:

If I didn’t have a zoom meeting in ten minutes 😠

You:

Maybe next Friday. 

You’re not sure why you’ve become a tease, but you’re enjoying winding him up. 

Walton:

Monday will be more like it.

You:

😜 Your trailer or mine.

Walton: 

Yours just so Trevor will stop texting me.

You let out a laugh, seemed like Trevor was also enjoying winding him up. You spend the rest of the day chatting with both of them. Sunday is a bit quieter, more zoom calls for Walt and Trevor had gone to Decon’s. 

*** Monday goes by in a blur, Walton keeps his hands to himself when others are around. But it doesn’t stop him from following you behind the food tent to steal kisses. You are now sporting a permanent flush and some of your co-workers are raising eyebrows. You are ever grateful that Trevor has kept his mouth shut. Liz is as pissy as ever but seems to be letting it lay. Katie has slowly warmed up to you again, why you weren’t sure. 

The rest of the week is pretty similar. Early mornings bleed into later evenings, the endless weeks have worn on you. Then Walton slides into your chair with his latest story and you feel like a weight is lifted off of you. The man once more touches you gently and gives you lingering cheek kisses as he goes over to set or costumes.   

Friday night rolls around and it’s going to be a long one. You fiddle with a few of your brushes when the door opens quickly. 

“We are being released. There was a fire on stage, and it looks like we are out at least until Monday,” Liz rolls in looking flustered, her normal perfect facade gone. She looks haggard and frazzled. 

“There was a fire on set?” You ask sitting up and feeling much more awake. Panic shoots down the back of your neck.

“Yep, green sparky left a light on too close to set.” Liz sat in the chair grabbing cleaner. You had stayed in the trailer to start tucking things away as Walton was off-screen for the first three setups. You are out the door before she has time to say more. You stop at costumes knocking at the door. 

Rebeccas opens it and looks down at you, she looks flustered but still has a smile on. “Hey, I am guessing you heard about the fire?”

“Yes, I did,” You say trying not to sound panicked, even though your mind is racing. The thought of him being hurt makes you nauseous. “Umm -is.”

Rebecca looks into the trailer, “Walt. You almost done in there?” There is a bunch of commotion going on in the trailer, with people moving back and forth, and different actors in various stages of undress.

You looked at her puzzled at how she knew you were looking for him. 

Rebecca turns back to you, “He never shuts up about you, so figured that’s why you are here,” She replies, and you immediately feel flustered, clearly rumors are moving again. 

“Oh- umm- Yeah. I just wanted to make sure he was okay.”

Walton pops his head above Rebecca his fingers nimbly button up his shirt. “Be right out.”

You blush and look away, “Sorry, I should probably go.”

Rebeca waved her hand at you, “Your secret is safe with me,” she winked. You wonder not for the first time if you were the only one who was never included in the rumor mill. 

Walton pops down the stairs, and has on grey button-up sleeves rolled up, navy wash jeans. He tilts his head when he looks at you. You let out a sigh seeing him unscathed. 

“You okay?” He asks, his hand touching your shoulder. You nod your head, turning to walk back towards the makeup trailer. You really don’t want to make a scene right now, there were way too many eyes on you both right now. 

“I know I said we should go to the bar tonight,” Walton says, his fingers brushing against yours. You try not to grab his hands, just to know he is still there. “But maybe we should get take out at my place?”

You get to the trailer, unable to stop looking around. He looks right at you, the way he could focus on you was both flattering and unnerving. Especially as you are trying to keep things under wraps. 

“Have to stop and grab a few things first.” You say trying to keep your voice from carrying. “Have you pick me up again?”

He smiles, “I would pick you up any day.”

You are bright red, as you open the door and follow the man into the trailer. 

***

A large paper bag of Chinese food was acquired, along with a couple of bottles of wine. You both devest at the door, slipping off your shoes, and placing the wine on the counter. You watch him move around the kitchen. Practice ease, you watch his muscles move under his shirt. You were tired as anything but being in his kitchen, waiting to eat greasy Chinese food couldn’t have been more perfect. 

You grab plates from him, laying out the smorgasbord board of different food. The two of you scooped a little of everything, before sitting down at the table and pouring some wine. 

“I feel like I should apologize for having you over instead of going out somewhere,” Walton says taking a sip of wine. “I don’t want you to think I am taking advantage of you being here.”

You chuckle, “Don’t know what you mean Mr. Goggins. I thought you invited me to your place to play some chess and listen to swing jazz.”

Walton nearly loses his food at the comment, his hand covering his mouth. “Swing jazz? How old do you think I am?”

“Oh you got to be at least in your seventies,” You tease back taking a bite out of your spring roll. 

Walton coughs, “I didn’t realize you where into grandfathers.”

You choke a little, “Well to be fair,” You wave your hand, “I am usually good with trying anything once.” 

Walton sips on his wine eyebrows raised, “Anything?”

You nod your head, a smile spreading across your face. “Can’t say I don’t like it unless I try it.”

He puts his glass down, watching you carefully as you finish your cup. “I could make some coffee while we clean up.”

You grab his plate stacking it with your own as he grabs the glasses. You two make it over to the kitchen, there is tension in the air as you clean things up. He grabs a French press out of the cupboards aswell as some coffee and cups.

You slide over to the counter and sit on top of it. Feet kicking back and forth as you watch the man ready things.  Flicking the kettle on to heat the water. He comes over and moves himself in between your legs.

“Have I told you how beautiful you are?” He whispers, placing hands on either side of your hips. Face inches from you.

You wrap your hands lazily over his shoulders, opening your legs to let him in closer. 

“No, you haven't today.” You lean in to kiss him, kissing him will never get old.

“You are stunning.” He whispers against your ear. Sending shivers down your spine. The kettle clicks and he's moving away from you. You watch him pour grinds and then water into the press. 

“Why did you wait so long to ask?” You inquire, moving your feet back and forth. Letting yourself briefly wonder if maybe the question was too forward.  

He turned to look at you, bottom lip caught in his teeth. “Umm-”  

Leaving the coffee he came over to you. Cheeks slightly pink, he tucked his hair behind his ear. 

“I - ahh. I didn't think you'd want to go out with me.” 

Your mouth falls open, “Are you serious?”

He shrugs, fingers fiddling with the outer seam of your jeans. You take his hand in yours using the moment to drag him back between your legs. Once he is there, you tip Walton’s head up to look right at you.

“You're so dumb,” You grin leaning in to kiss him. He chuckles and leans into the kiss, strong arms wrapping around you. “I am also dumb, 'cause I thought the same thing about you.”

Walton pulls back looking at you, eyebrows scrunched. “Didn't you just call me dumb? Seems like we both may have missed the sign somewhere along the way.”

You grin one hand finding its way to rub along his jawline. “Took us long enough.”

He smiled, “Trevor is never going to let us live this down.”

You let out a groan, “He is beyond impossible. I am gonna have a small textbook of text messages.”

Walton’s eyes glint, and he pulls his phone out. “Why don't we give him an update.”

You can't help but laugh, “Oh absolutely!” 

Walton flips his phone on turning on the camera he flips it to the two of you. You lean in and kiss him deeply as he clicks the button. The phone is placed on the counter as you wrap your legs around his waist. You pull out a deep moan that rumbles out of his chest when you bite at his bottom lip. It doesn't stop you from pushing your tongue in. Rocking your hips a little, the room feels hot. 

Walton pulls away, breathless, “If you keep doing that, I am liable to forget about our coffee.”

You let out a sigh, “I suppose a little coffee couldn't won't hurt.” You unwrap yourself from him. 

He moves down the counter as you slide off it. He mixes your coffee just the way you like it, handing you the cup as he fixes his own. You wait, watching him work, he turns and gestures toward the living room. You make your way over to the couch.  

Folding yourself up on the end of the sofa, tucking one leg underneath the other. You sip on the coffee, it is delicious and beats any store bought. Walton comes over and sits beside you, taking a long sip of his drink. Looking out the windows you can see part of downtown and the north shore. The lights still dazzling, as the evening wore on. 

“I know, before, I said I wasn’t sure you would want to go out with me,” He said looking out at the window as he spoke. “I tried, unsuccessfully to give you space. But the further I got away the more I missed being near you. Then when we went out for sushi, it all just kinda clicked. This isn’t conventional.” He gestures between the two of you. You hold your cup listening intently. 

“I am, ahh, older than you. And my life is not exactly straightforward. I don’t take relationships lightly, not that this is that. Or.” You can’t suppress the smile as he tries to explain himself. “I am terrible at this. I don’t want to move too fast, but also. I can’t stop thinking about you.” 

You put your cup down, and gesture for him to come closer. He places his cup down beside yours and moves over. Patting your lap, he slips down and lays his head on your lap. You run your hands through his hair, his eyes close and he hums softly against your legs. 

“I can’t tell you what's going to happen,” You say softly, “I am also not good at this, but I am willing to try. However fast or slow you want to go. As for the age thing, I don’t care, it’s never bothered me.” 

Walton’s breath slows and his hand slips under your thigh holding you close. You sit there a while longer, letting him just relax against you. Again you are struck by how simple it is, to just sit here with a warm cup of coffee and the city lights. You could get used to weekends like this. But as always he is moving sitting up and smoothing out his hair, grabbing his cup of coffee and taking a sip. 

“Would you like to come to bed with me?” He asks, you turn away from the lights. His eyes fixed on you, not hungry but curious. 

“I would like that a lot,” You say licking your lips and heart pounding in your chest. 

Walton stands up offering you a hand, which you take, pulling yourself to your feet. The coffee is left on the table as you follow him. Fingers laced together like they are two puzzle pieces. You pass by the guest room and there is a door at the end of the hallway. He opens it and you walk into the large room. There are floor-to-ceiling windows looking out over the sea, a large king-sized bed on a wooden platform. The room is sparse, with two side tables with lamps. A large walk-in closet to your left along with a bathroom beside it. You wonder for a moment how often he has brought others back here. The thought lingers in the back of your mind as you wander over to sit on the edge of the bed. Walton has disappeared into the bathroom.

“I think I have another toothbrush in here,” He calls out, poking his head around the corner. 

You smile and move towards him, “I thought you wanted to take things slow?”

He’s blushing again and handing you the unopened toothbrush, “I–I umm. Just figure I’d offer.” 

You move into the bathroom grabbing some toothpaste off the counter and leaning against it, “I appreciate it, besides don’t want to have coffee breath. Would you happen to have makeup wipes?”

Walton thinks for a moment before he scoots you out of the way, as you brush your teeth. He pops up with a bottle of cleanser and a fresh hand towel. “I knew I had it here somewhere.”

You grin and thank him, he brushes his teeth before disappearing again. You take the moment to clean off your face and neck. Looking into the mirror you got a permanent smile on your face. Letting out a happy sigh you finish up, telling yourself not to put the cart in front of the horses. You walk out and Walton is standing there shirtless, blinds drawn. He slips into a grey cotton t-shirt, that you currently hate, and black sweatpants. Sensing you staring he turns around to see you. 

Chapter seven

*tiny cliffhanger. I always need at least one 😜*

*As always if you'd like to be tagged let me know! *

*reblogs, likes, and comments appreciated! *

#walton goggins #wallton goggins x reader #x reader #fan fiction #fantasy #fluff #fanfic #writing #angst #hurt comfort #au #alternate universe #older man x younger women

[aachria]

ive been on here like five times but I have THEORIES DAMMIT

let kings come to the domain of the stars. Or let the kings rule over the stars? It really depends on the context of dominion — whether it means have dominion or if it means dominion like a place. And if any of those marks were punctuation, it may mean something else entirely

surely some star binds me to you

oh my god we got a reference to the title, let me explain more (and my small theory)

ok so they both died (Ed and mystery man who we're gonna call Canadian gramps, or CG) and ended up in the world of one piece. Ed died in 2023 and cg died around 20 years ago which was 2004. surprise surprise, in 2004 in the real word volume 32, the one that ended skypiea and started long ring long land, volume 33 with the Davy back fight, volume 34 THE INTRO TO WATER SEVEN, and volume 35 still in water 7, were all released. let me say the again, the two volumes that were introducing water 7 were released in 2004, the year that CG supposedly died in. i think that CG and Ed knew each other in a past life, maybe they were related or maybe they weren't, but not in the real world, but this kingdom that has been mentioned. Ed and CG are connected to the stars, I think its trying to let us believe that either they are gods or do literally have actual control over them, they rule over them. surely some star binds me to you, a star that they perhaps both share or rule over. the fact that Ed ate devil fruit that can flip an entire island isn't a coincidence, they don't just turn the gravity of others but CONTROL THEM. i think we can even assume that CG may have had some sort of power after he died a second time and was sent to one piece. Ed is more powerful then we are let on, even Ed isn't aware of this. Ed was almost talking to their past self in the dream they had, when they're talking to their mouth I believe it was past Ed, before they were reincarnated. they boy that the others mentioned, it reminds me of Luffy but I don't believe so, I think its either CG or Joyboy. I think that Ed has some sort of connection to Joyboy and maybe even CG does too. when Ed says that they saw a halo above Luffy I don't think it was just delirium, I think its supposed to be Ed seeing Luffy as Joyboy. Ed, CG, and Joyboy were possibly kings or gods of the stars and they died. they died and only CG and Ed were taken to the "real world" but Joyboy stayed back, CG and Ed died again and came (back?) to one piece. this isn't going to turn into Ed finding out who CG is but finding out they were once apart of the stars. surely some star binds me to you, maybe it does, maybe they are bound by the stars. also I'm pretty sure he died 20 years ago right? I was kinda confused with the years and stuff in the new chapter so if you explain plssssss

Your brain is doing things. Your theory definitely hits quite a few interesting points, which I appreciate. As a reward for being such a sweetheart, I’ll give you a hint. Pseudo dad/uncle (or Canadian gramps, which is hilarious) did not die in 2004. Take that as you will, and happy theorying.

The year thing from last chapter was like this; Roger died and the Roger Pirates disbanded around 20 years ago in canon, which is when Ed assumed CG gave Crocus the spyglass. The Oro Jackson was built some time before the God Valley incident, which was 39 years before canon (post-timeskip time I believe, so more like 37 years current time) and Ed guessed that CG had the coin stamped in the spyglass made when they were on Water 7 to get the ship. That doesn’t give us any definitive knowledge about what age CG was, or when they could have arrived in the world of One Piece. Mayhaps the answer shall be revealed this saga, but who knows.

#sssbmty #one piece #one piece ocs #math is not my strong suit I will not lie to you

[gotham-daydreams]

For your Not [] I was wondering how would Alfred and Y/n's relationship post kidnapped will go? Down the drain? Sure, they may have some reprieve from the rest of the family with Alfred, but would they resent Alfred for causing them to come back to the manor? After gathering the clues it was Alfred that pushed them to find you.

Also would Y/n have eventually gotten back into contact with Alfred after taking their much needed break away from the family, to help figure out and find themselves?

Well, that's the thing, I suppose!

I have thought about their relationship post kidnapping, and honestly I don't even know if the reader will ever logically know the extent of what Alfred has done to ensure that they stay in the position they're in. Especially, well, considering how I plan for Chapter 4 to go.

Of course at some point they'll definitely be able to deduce that he did something- they'll be able to tell from the things some of the Batfam says and just generally how Alfred acts, even if said things they catch with Alfred aren't all as they seem. But if they'll know the full extent of it? How much he played a part in what happened? In what ends up happening? Maybe not, not everything but maybe enough to be afraid. To get a peak into the ruin and shitty mess that is their life, and the true extent of that ruin. But a glance is only a glance, y'know?

I guess that's the scary thing - for me personally, anyways - that they won't know right away. That even when it happens they'll have no idea, and for those moments where they remain ignorant, unaware, and blind- Alfred is their saving grace. The only sane person amongst the endless sea of madness and derange that is the Batfam. The only person that seems to under their side, that not only comforts them but someone they actually feel comfortable and safe with. Alfred is the only one they trust, and... well, I rather not spoil how he feels about that.

Though, for the reader- from the little they put together and the little they know, its heartbreaking all the same. They don’t want to accept it- who would? The only person after being stripping and taken from their life- is just as insane as the rest? The only person they felt like they could confide in? That they could trust? That they could allow themselves to be vulnerable with when the others were away? That person is just as insane? Just as cunning and- and tricked them too?

It ruins them, and even if I won't say much else as it will be shown when I have it written- I think what I've said here is a good enough image of how badly things get from there once the reader even gets an idea of what Alfred may have potentially done. Though even if they did reach out now, they would probably still hold the whole "everything is fine" attitude they've got going on, and just try to talk to him normally- if not then at least passively mention how the family is sort of being weird and giving you a hard time (will that cause him to stop them? Not at all, but maybe things could've turned out differently. Which may be a recurring thing?? Well- it sort of already is but yk!)

As for the reader reaching out- I think I mentioned this in an previous (albeit older) post a bit in passing, but the reader has technically been in touch with Alfred! Just... not in a way he prefers. They are technically communicating with him, but it's very one sided (which is by design) and... well, may or may not be one of the reasons Alfred kick started this mess.

If this didn't answer your question then I apologize! Feel free to send in another ask if you want, and I can clarify anything you have any questions about!

#talking daydreams #yandere batfam #platonic yandere batfam #not series

[nohoperadio]

My favourite author is Iris Murdoch.

I don't think I have favourites in any other category, it feels like a bit of an artificial concept usually, but it would be silly to deny this one. I was halfway through my first Murdoch novel (at age 20 or so) when I felt certain I was going to have to read them all (there are 26). My feeling was that I would have stayed true to that even if every other book she wrote had been terrible. I'm sure that's not true, but I say it to illustrate that she inspired a deep and irrational loyalty in me very early on that hasn't waned over time. I've been reading between one and three of her books per year since I started, deliberately spreading them out so as not to deplete a valuable resource too soon, although presumably I'll just start rereading them at the same rate after I've finished. I've read 21 out of 26 so far.

Maybe someday I'll have something to say on here about what draws me to her books so strongly. Not right now though. What I want to say today is that I usually like her opening lines very much, she often starts with some very punchy compact moment that feels weirdly complete already even as it clearly stands in need of unpacking, if that makes sense to anyone else. This post is going to be simply a compilation of some good ones. Let's say 10 of the best, in no particular order.

I'm defining "opening lines" as not literally just the first sentence but enough to cover the first self-contained "moment" of the book, which is a bit of a judgment call for sure but you can be confident I've judged correctly in every case. For The Philosopher's Pupil (but no others) I've blatantly cheated by entirely skipping a sort of prologue chapter because I think the opening of the next chapter is both more opening-like and more compelling, I acknowledge that this is illegitimate but you'll just have to deal with it. Okay here goes.

---

The Unicorn

'How far away is it?'

'Fifteen miles.'

'Is there a bus?'

'There is not.'

'Is there a taxi or a car I can hire in the village?'

'There is not.'

'Then how am I to get there?'

'You might hire a horse hereabouts,' someone suggested after a silence.

---

An Accidental Man

'Gracie darling, will you marry me?'

'Yes.'

'What?'

---

The Bell

Dora Greenfield left her husband because she was afraid of him. She decided six months later to return to him for the same reason.

---

The Philosopher's Pupil

I am the narrator: a discreet and self-effacing narrator. This book is not about me.

---

Bruno's Dream

Bruno was waking up. The room seemed to be dark. He held his breath, testing the quality of the darkness, wondering if it was night or day, morning or afternoon. If it was night that was bad and might be terrible. Afternoon could be terrible too if he woke up too early. The drama of sleeping and waking had become preoccupying and fearful now that consciousness itself could be so heavy a burden.

---

The Sacred and Profane Love Machine

The boy was there again this morning, and the dogs were not barking.

---

A Fairly Honourable Defeat

'Julius King.'

'You speak his name as if you were meditating upon it.'

'I am meditating upon it.'

'He's not a saint.'

'He's not a saint. And yet—'

---

The Message to the Planet

'Of course we have to do with two madmen now, not with one.'

'You mean Marcus is mad too?'

'No, he means Patrick is mad too.'

---

The Red and the Green

Ten more glorious days without horses!

---

The Sea, The Sea

The sea which lies before me as I write glows rather than sparkles in the bland May sunshine. With the tide turning, it leans quietly against the land, almost unflecked by ripples or by foam. Near the horizon it is a luxurious purple, spotted with regular lines of emerald green. At the horizon it is indigo. Near to the shore, where my view is framed by rising heaps of humpy yellow rock, there is a band of lighter green, icy and pure, less radiant, opaque however, not transparent. We are in the north, and the bright sunshine cannot penetrate the sea. Where the gentle water taps the rocks there is still a surface skin of colour. The cloudless sky is very pale at the indigo horizon which it lightly pencils in with silver. Its blue gains towards the zenith and vibrates there. But the sky looks cold, even the sun looks cold.

I had written the above, destined to be the opening paragraph of my memoirs, when something happened which was so extraordinary and so horrible that I cannot bring myself to describe it even now after an interval of time and although a possible, though not totally reassuring, explanation has occurred to me. Perhaps I shall feel calmer and more clear-headed after yet another interval.

#sometimes you gotta make a too long post that's entirely just for you you know? #nohopereadio #uninteresting #iris murdoch

[sillyyuserr]

(Ch 114 spoilers) After reading chapter 114 I ran to your blog to see if you made any analysis on it yet. Obviously no pressure at all, take as much time as you need. But we NEED to talk about the fact that Teru 100% does not have a crush on girl Aoi, I know that in the new timeline, the Teru from that world hates girl Aoi but Teru also seems to be very uncomfortable about the fact that he's engaged to his so called crush, Idk about you but I'd be hyped if my crush was miraculously engaged to ME. And he's not even at all sad that his "crush" likes another guy (Akane)

Pretttyyy suspicious...

YES i was thinking ab that

He was BEAMING when he was able to confirm aoi doesnt like him

and his awkward smiling throughout the whole thing too

him questioning why he didn’t want it really gets me though. I mean the ‘i don’t like girls who mope around and act like victims’ doesn’t really sound like teru and he acknowledges that, kind of showing that he doesn't think that’s actually why he didn’t want it, and he was just lying as to not make her think he’s weird.

but why would he lie unless its something bad? Frowned upon even? Hmm wonder what that could be

also the ‘pretend to date around others’ troupe i feel is so hinted it hurts. I mean they literally agreed to act happy in public like bro

also akane next to the ‘im akane-san’s fiance’ almost makes u think he’s talking ab akane

Also this comes to show he knows and acknowledges they like eachother. Like aoi likes him back and he knows this, mentioning akane’s name like a billion times

also the ‘teru-akane-aoi’ love triangle seems to finally take shape, aoi likes akane, akane likes aoi, and teru, who does he like? Since now we KNOW for a FACT he does not like aoi, this matches up almost perfectly with what i had thought was happening, teru seems, in a way, to like akane. I mean theres so much? I would run out of room if i were to recount everything but i have 20+ analysies posted explaining it😭

i feel like the more we progress in the series, the less canon terukane becomes, and the more gay teru is revealed to be.

sneaking this in here but im like PRETTY sure mitsukou is like actually real. I mean its been real but i just ugh

Also

You think maybe mitsuba is the ‘senpai’?

#sigh 😔 #terukane #real #tbhk #minamoto teru #aoi akane #aidairo #analysis #meow