#that’s kinda always the case with transactions

[3amsnek]

hi if this isn’t something you prefer answering you can ignore my ask!

so i wanted to know how much stripe reveals your info to people who pay you? through ko fi and all that. what i mean is when someone gives the creator money through ko fi using paypal their name (legal name) is revealed on invoice so does that happen with stripe as well?

i’ve heard with stripe, creators can hide their legal name and use another which shows up on invoices but im unsure if it’s true

hi! I actually had this same concern and did a lot of poking around for how different platforms handle this while setting up my commissions so I will attempt to answer! disclaimer I am just a guy who is bad with technology so there is a chance I am wrong about things ok here’s a readmore attempt click to get Snek’s business knowledge

this is actually the main reason I rly like stripe, you can customize pretty much everything clients will see including how much information about yourself you want to give away- I literally only have 3amsnek as my name in there, it’s just my business name (the Public Details section of settings lets you mess with this as much as you like, it’s under the Business Settings category)

it gives my country & state on some invoices but no further details (I can’t remember if state is mandatory or I clicked on the wrong button somewhere setting it up but I can’t disable it so keep that in mind) (I can change it along with everything else in my info though)

you do need to give Stripe all of your information for legal and payment purposes which can be kinda intimidating to set up but within my account I can customize what name will show up everywhere it shows up, put a different email than the one I signed up with as a customer support email to go at the bottom of receipts, decide specifically how much of my location is shown- idk if this is super clear bc I’m not at all experienced in Business Advice but by my memory/experience it doesn’t even ask for a Firstname Lastname name anywhere that’ll be shown to customers

for the record I’ve never actually used paypal bc my account got nuked within a day of making it and they have simply refused to fix it so I don’t have a direct comparison from personal experience but from my various hours of research trying to put comms together it seemed like paypal will always give everyone involved in the transaction a stupid amount of information about each other and there rly isn’t much to do about it/things can’t be changed ever or at least without huge difficulty and my experience with Stripe has been not that at All,,, it’s been very nice tbh I even found a whole invoices feature that allows international bank transfers as a payment method making a workaround for people who only have paypal & no card

if this is still confusing you can dm me and I’ll send you a picture of my checkout page/invoice/email receipt templates, it rly only shows my profile picture for stripe which I selected and can change (for me it’s the same dragon I use for my ko-fi header) and my business name in big letters at the top to say who you’re paying and then it’s the checkout/payment setup for the client (looks like any other online shopping checkout thing rly) - I haven’t been able to Confirm confirm that this all shows up properly on receipts as I don’t rly have a way to run a test with it with actual payment but it shows you what all the graphics are set to show up as in your account (under Branding in settings, same Business Settings box as Public Details is in) and you can change all of it any time (I do think you can also send blank test receipts to yourself)

hopefully this helps clarify things? at this point of using it for a couple months I would say I’d recommend Stripe- I’ve been rly pleased with it so far, especially with this specific topic :]

#snek asks #anon asks à la snek #If I’m misreading this and you’re asking how much information I can see about clients- full name on the card used and zip code is all I get #(sometimes that’s hard to find with invoices too I’ve noticed) #and tbh I’ve got adhd I can pretty much guarantee if I’ve seen a name you don’t want seen it is Not sticking around in the ol noggin #I’m pretty sure the person receiving the payment Does need to know A Name involved for keeping records & tax purposes #that’s kinda always the case with transactions #but yeah paypal SUCKS about legal names #(< can’t use it at all bc I was still in the middle of getting new ids after changing mine when I made my account so they apparently Still #don’t believe I exist) #if I did misread this. whoops. here is a lot of business information you did not want or need? bon appetit? #but I Think im on the right track #short answer: shockingly little and you can rly customize. everything it’s pretty neat #thank u for thinking I am enough of a Professional Businessman to answer questions im honored hopefully I did not get something very wrong 👍

[005mins]

/ those of u guys who write s.ervants or have f.ate s.ervant verses, would u let d.aybit be ur muses' m.aster-

#;ooc #ooc #asking for-- science-- #LISTEN; i think compared to a lot of v trashy magus; he is pretty reasonable m.aster #once i get on da computer ill try to find the screenshots of some interactions he has with t.ezcatlipoca #and yes in part there's the thing that;; logically he doesnt really want to anger t.ezca bc he is a very powerful servant #but at the same time; i feel like their dynamic has always been pretty even; they understand each other in a similar wavelength #to the point that d.aybit can poke t.ezca a little and it ends up being a light-hearted situation for both #the thing i like about d.aybit as a master is that he holds a high level of respect tl t.ezca; which magus sometimes kind of shrug that off #like; im thinking of d.iar and his master k.ayneth and his wife that now i forgot her name #and how they treated diar and his morals and how all of that went down in f.ate z.ero #it always surprises me how every m.aster that has appeared in any f.ate rendition deals with their own s.ervants #we know that generally magus are kinda sussy but there are cases where its diff like h.akuno and their servant or r.itsuka in f.go #how the bond they forged with eaxh servant is so powerful that they wod all come to help them were they to be in trouble #taking the example lf r.itsuka; they have a higher compatibility for making those deep connections which #d.aybit's case could fit a more 'mutual transaction' sort of deal; unless he were to connect with the s.ervant in question like with t.ez #but if not; it would be something like;; #Here is my goal. What do you want to do? #always thinking about how d.aybit asked t.ezca if it was ok that they were continuing with their plot #like; if t.ezca had gone instead like;; 'nah man. i think this whole plan is going to shit let's call it a day' #d.aybit would have gone like; ok. and that's it? #which yes it should be the regular but some m.asters really just see their s.ervants as disposable weapons; bc some magus are lit shaped #like that #am i making sense? #/g.oogled it and k.ayneth's wife's name was sola-ui omg- #its been aaageeeees #which hey im not saying d.aybit is the best master but at least there's honest respect which is key

[hyprfxtdbstrd]

I'm seeing everyone pointing out the possible issues with Epic the Musical's deviation from the original story of Circe and Odysseus, and as someone who's studied Ancient Greece/ancient Greek myths a bit, I wanted to say some stuff about it. This will be a bit of a long one, so apologies for my rambling!

Note that I'm not trying to shit on SA survivor's perspectives and (completely valid) arguments. I'm just trying to offer some context surrounding the original myth and how it fits (or rather, doesn't fit) with a modern audience. If I'm wrong with any of this, feel free to call me out! Criticize the shit out of me! I like learning about Greek culture and myths and would 100% love to hear other perspectives on this.

So, a few points about Ancient Greek myths to kind of explain the context around Circe and Odysseus:

Greek myths generally did not have good views/depictions of women. Women were almost always depicted as conniving, selfish, sexually insatiable creatures. To largely summarize the process within actual Greek society, women had three/four stages in their life: child, dangerous/wild virgin (after first menstruation), married woman (whose wildness was tamed by her husband), and then a "real" woman (a mother). There are a few deviations from the "evil" trope, the most prominent of which being Penelope herself—she's basically the ideal Greek wife, staying loyal to her husband for 20 years and all that.

Adultery only applied to women. Husbands cheating on their wives wasn't merely tolerated, but expected. Marital sex wasn't seen as enjoyable, rather something that had to be done for the sake of reproduction and continuing the bloodline/securing inheritance. Men cheated on their wives with various kinds of prostitutes, concubines, mistresses, etc, but sleeping with unmarried women (that weren't specifically prostitutes) or married women was looked down upon. Women didn't have this same standard. They could only sleep with their husbands, hell, their husbands were pretty much the only men they could even interact with (excluding family, obviously).

The original myth has Hermes very plainly lay out how Odysseus' confrontation with Circe will go: Odysseus will eat the moly, draw his sword at her, she'll proposition him, and Hermes directly tells Odysseus to accept. Basically a "sleep with her if you want your men to live" situation. (See this post for more specifics on this).

So, let's apply this to Epic: The Musical. Here's some reasons I think may explain the Circe myth being changed:

The Greek "women being evil" stereotype is... problematic. While I 100% understand that it's important to acknowledge male victims of SA, I don't think the original myth was focusing on Odysseus being a victim—I saw it more of an emphasis on Circe being a sexually selfish woman, as all Greek women were believed to be. Changing Circe to be less conniving and evil deviates from the concerning Greek stereotype.

The SA in the myth is not actually very clearly SA. Yes, with a modern perspective, it absolutely is sexual coercion, but for Greeks, not so much. It made sense to them that sex could be transactional. It's already been established that Epic, while still generally accurate to the original myth, does change things relating to morality/themes in order to better align with modern Western ideas (i.e. OG Odysseus not being as remorseful and merciful, as that was expected of a Greek hero, but Epic Odysseus having more empathy because that's more modernly heroic). If something from the original myth doesn't translate well into modern culture, then it's understandable to want to change or omit it.

In the case that the original Circe myth wasn't SA (I'm not saying one is more right than the other, I'm just covering all the bases), then it wouldn't even constitute as cheating. Like I described earlier, it was perfectly acceptable and expected for men to sleep with women that weren't their wives. Plus, being a goddess, she's already kinda exempt from being blamed if Odysseus slept with her—only women are ever really blamed for sleeping with (or being SAed by) gods, and even then, their husbands sometimes don't even give a shit. But modernly, we would not see it that way. To us, it's not societally acceptable for a married man to sleep with another woman (without his wife's consent, at least). While Ancient Greeks viewed Odysseus as a good (or at least okay) husband, a modern audience wouldn't. Making Odysseus loyal to Penelope and not sleeping with other women (assuming this wasn't SA, but again that's one interpretation) makes him the good, loyal, empathic, modernly heroic man that Epic is clearly aiming for. Repeating my last point: If something from the original myth doesn't translate well into modern culture, then it's understandable to want to change or omit it.

Applying modern perspectives on Ancient Greek society and mythology isn't worth it. Like, we all joke about Ancient Greece being super gay, but they didn't actually like gay men. Homosexuality was literally only acceptable when it was between a young man and a prepubescent boy (it was called pederasty if you want to know more) or between women (they only considered penetrative sex to be 'real' sex so they didn't really care what women did with other women). Y'know the Hades and Persephone story? Like, the original one with the kidnapping? Yeah, that was normal. The myth of Demeter and Persephone is tragic, yes, but it was so normal that wedding ceremonies often included references/recreations of it! Girls got married off ASAP after their first menstruation to men of at least 30 years old. We don't tolerate that shit today (for the most part, at least)! But it was normal in Ancient Greece. Applying modern rules and standards to ancient culture just does not work.

Anyways, I'll shut up now! I'm gonna go keep listening to The Circe Saga lmao

EDIT: there is good criticism in the reblogs of this post that adds more perspective and corrects some of my generalizations/insights!!

#can you tell im a history major #seriously tho im not trying to shit on the opinions of SA survivors talking about this #the greeks were just kinda fucked up #greek mythology #epic the musical #odysseus #the odyssey #circe #circe saga #the circe saga #hermes #epic the circe saga #ancient greece #history

[aspd-culture]

Welcome back. You’re very informative.

I’m very confused about how numerous people, from you, to other antisocial people speaking from their experiences (some of which I learned are actually friends) to prosocial researchers of ASPD say that antisocial people see relationships as transactional. It’s not weird that you guys see it that way, it’s more like “and prosocials… don’t???” Because I’m certain I’m prosocial. I’m neurodivergent, sure, but no signs of ASPD. So, how do most prosocial people typically view relationships if they’re not transactional?

So I find prosocials and pwASPD both tend to think “but doesn’t everybody” when we hear this - it’s a super undescriptive term - but we’re thinking different things define something as transactional. We also see the reason for that transaction to be different.

From a prosocial generally, they’ll mean “I only want to be around people that ‘don’t drain my energy’, that don’t just take take take, that we mutually enjoy the friendship/relationship and want to be around each other”. That’s kinda their definition of getting something out of it, and they want everyone to get something out of it. If they’re draining you, they want you to be free of it so you can be happy, and the transactions involved can be purely emotional/vibes. The reason they feel this way is a desire for positive and enjoyable social connection; the consequence for an uneven/bad/missing transaction is discomfort and wasting their time in negative experiences and generally feeling bad in association with that person.

PwASPD see those transactions very very literally. There’s no vibes nor emotions in the transactions, those are either a reaction to the transaction or a bonus. We mean that we are getting something tangible or practical out of it. Rides, help with things we can’t or don’t want to do alone, sex, maybe even the social relief from the annoyance of “why don’t you ever talk to anyone?” coming from all sides. We also don’t always care if it’s even on the other person’s end. If they’re ok driving me everywhere/if they do it and don’t say or show they’re uncomfortable, then I will assume they are fine with that piece of the transaction. If I’m taking more than I’m giving and they seem chill with that then I’ll accept it. However, I won’t give them *nothing* and that’s because of our reason for transactions - it’s dangerous otherwise. First off, I have shit I need I can’t get myself as much as it sucks, so I need to be around people. But if we need something from them, what we learned in our childhoods is that we don’t get that for free. There’s always something over your head. A lot of pwASPD had friends or caregivers that would hold favors or even *basic, legally-mandated caregiving* over our heads as though we didn’t deserve it. Often our value was determined as a child by what we provided, and since children can’t provide much, we were worthless and not deserving of good treatment.

This is part of the reason (TW non-descriptive CSA mention, skip to the next paragraph if you want) that people thought ASPD was directly correlated with CSA for a long time - many cases of long term CSA come from either “I’ll give you x/do x for you if you help me with this” or worse, doing something first then saying “but I gave you X!/did X for you! I wouldn’t have if I knew you’d act like this”, often call us selfish if we tried to say no and maybe get aggressive or forceful after, and that is an easy lead-in to our view of interactions.

So a lot of us see it that if we want to be safe/know we can continue to get what we need, we HAVE to be giving them something. If you claim you like being around me “just to be around me” or worse that you’re willing to do something for me “just because I want to”, that’s not safe. You want something from me and I’ll give it to you - just tell me what it is. If you’re not telling me, that means it’s not good or you’re just gonna decide later that I’m selfish. You might hurt me to get what you want and justify it with this. Take something from my side so we’re even, because even means safe. Even means I get access to what I need and you get access to what you need - so now we’re both using this relationship/friendship/etc for something and you wouldn’t wanna mess that up by putting me in danger any more than I’d want to mess it up by putting you in danger.

Of course, not every prosocial sees it the first way and not every pwASPD had those experiences and/or sees it that way. But that’s what I’ve found to be common. If you see “they make me happy” as what your or their end of the transaction is, it’s definitely a prosocial response, maybe with the exception of thinking of it as “getting their brain to dopamine/oxytocin” vs caring how they’re actually feeling. If not, if you need it to be practical, that’s definitely transactional.

It’s important to note this is personal relationships with no practical consequences to ending the relationship - most people see relationships (platonic) with coworkers or managers as transactional and that’s a way I usually explain it to prosocials (“do you deal with your boss bc you like them or bc they sign your check - and would your boss keep you hired if you didn’t do your job because you make them happy just by being there?”). But with a romantic or sexual partner, a friend, etc. this is not a typical view of relationships.

That said - you can *absolutely* not have ASPD and have transactional view of relationships. It’s not a 1:1 thing there; not everyone with ASPD has it and not every prosocial doesn’t. It’s just a really common piece of the puzzle that is this personality disorder.

Edit: ack I’m so sorry I forgot to add the csa tw tags they’re there now.

Plain text below the cut:

So I find prosocials and pwASPD both tend to think “but doesn’t everybody” when we hear this - it’s a super undescriptive term - but we’re thinking different things define something as transactional. We also see the reason for that transaction to be different.

From a prosocial generally, they’ll mean “I only want to be around people that ‘don’t drain my energy’, that don’t just take take take, that we mutually enjoy the friendship/relationship and want to be around each other”. That’s kinda their definition of getting something out of it, and they want everyone to get something out of it. If they’re draining you, they want you to be free of it so you can be happy, and the transactions involved can be purely emotional/vibes. The reason they feel this way is a desire for positive and enjoyable social connection; the consequence for an uneven/bad/missing transaction is discomfort and wasting their time in negative experiences and generally feeling bad in association with that person.

PwASPD see those transactions very very literally. There’s no vibes nor emotions in the transactions, those are either a reaction to the transaction or a bonus. We mean that we are getting something tangible or practical out of it. Rides, help with things we can’t or don’t want to do alone, sex, maybe even the social relief from the annoyance of “why don’t you ever talk to anyone?” coming from all sides. We also don’t always care if it’s even on the other person’s end. If they’re ok driving me everywhere/if they do it and don’t say or show they’re uncomfortable, then I will assume they are fine with that piece of the transaction. If I’m taking more than I’m giving and they seem chill with that then I’ll accept it. However, I won’t give them *nothing* and that’s because of our reason for transactions - it’s dangerous otherwise. First off, I have shit I need I can’t get myself as much as it sucks, so I need to be around people. But if we need something from them, what we learned in our childhoods is that we don’t get that for free. There’s always something over your head. A lot of pwASPD had friends or caregivers that would hold favors or even *basic, legally-mandated caregiving* over our heads as though we didn’t deserve it. Often our value was determined as a child by what we provided, and since children can’t provide much, we were worthless and not deserving of good treatment.

This is part of the reason (TW non-descriptive CSA mention, skip to the next paragraph if you want) that people thought ASPD was directly correlated with CSA for a long time - many cases of long term CSA come from either “I’ll give you x/do x for you if you help me with this” or worse, doing something first then saying “but I gave you X!/did X for you! I wouldn’t have if I knew you’d act like this”, often call us selfish if we tried to say no and maybe get aggressive or forceful after, and that is an easy lead-in to our view of interactions.

So a lot of us see it that if we want to be safe/know we can continue to get what we need, we HAVE to be giving them something. If you claim you like being around me “just to be around me” or worse that you’re willing to do something for me “just because I want to”, that’s not safe. You want something from me and I’ll give it to you - just tell me what it is. If you’re not telling me, that means it’s not good or you’re just gonna decide later that I’m selfish. You might hurt me to get what you want and justify it with this. Take something from my side so we’re even, because even means safe. Even means I get access to what I need and you get access to what you need - so now we’re both using this relationship/friendship/etc for something and you wouldn’t wanna mess that up by putting me in danger any more than I’d want to mess it up by putting you in danger.

Of course, not every prosocial sees it the first way and not every pwASPD had those experiences and/or sees it that way. But that’s what I’ve found to be common. If you see “they make me happy” as what your or their end of the transaction is, it’s definitely a prosocial response, maybe with the exception of thinking of it as “getting their brain to dopamine/oxytocin” vs caring how they’re actually feeling. If not, if you need it to be practical, that’s definitely transactional.

It’s important to note this is personal relationships with no practical consequences to ending the relationship - most people see relationships (platonic) with coworkers or managers as transactional and that’s a way I usually explain it to prosocials (“do you deal with your boss bc you like them or bc they sign your check - and would your boss keep you hired if you didn’t do your job because you make them happy just by being there?”). But with a romantic or sexual partner, a friend, etc. this is not a typical view of relationships.

That said - you can *absolutely* not have ASPD and have transactional view of relationships. It’s not a 1:1 thing there; not everyone with ASPD has it and not every prosocial doesn’t. It’s just a really common piece of the puzzle that is this personality disorder.

Edit: ack I’m so sorry I forgot to add the csa tw tags they’re there now.

#tw mentions of sex #tw csa #tw csa mention #tw abuse mention #tw sa #tw sa mention #tw child abuse mention #tw child abuse #aspd-culture-is #aspd culture is #aspd culture #actually aspd #aspd #aspd awareness #actually antisocial #antisocial personality disorder #aspd traits #anons welcome

[keen-li]

CLAWED | JJK | CH 06

Synopsis: "do you honestly think I want your help? I'm desperate " you can still see the hatred he has for you in his eyes, but you can also see the desperation.

Genre: e2l, angst, fluff, smut-ish. Convict jk x police officer reader

Warnings: none for now.

____________________

You're in the chief's office waiting for him to arrive, he called for you which was rare. You were usually the one to follow him.

The air thickens when he enters the room as you exchange good mornings.

This man always carried an aura that made you stiffen and sit up straight.

"I've noticed your hard work and determination over the last cases you were on" He compliments you and you almost crack a smile as you thank him for his words.

"Don't let my compliment got to your head though" he chuckles and though you don't want to you chuckle aswell.

"It won't sir" you reassure.

"That's good cause I want you on the Kim case"

Your eyes almost bulge out in surprise when he says this. He wants you on this case? The case you've been thinking about every night even involving your neighbour to help discuss it.

"Me?" You question in disbelief and he nods "when?"

"Right now. The more officers we can have maybe the faster it can move. And you'll be joined by sunho...." and immediately he says sunho's name you block out the other names he says after that. You're gonna be working with sunho. Your heart races in frustration at the thought. First living with jungkook now working on the same case with sunho, what next?

When you get back to your station you hear sunho speak to you but you block him out.

"Looks like we're gonna be working together" you deadpan him not amused by his sarcastic tone. Why can't he just leave you alone.

__________________________

If anyone ever told you that you were gonna be in a car with sunho in the driver's seat you would rebuke them. But you had no choice but to be there because you never know the advantage completing and solving this case might have. Though it's painful to sit next to him you just have to, who knows you could get promoted after this.

you and sunho are seated in front of one of the largest banks in town on an task the chief sent you on.

The chief sent you and him to collect a file containing information about the Kim case. You and sunho haven't really talked and he hasn't said much to you. Seems like he's only a big talker in a crowd.

"You wanna go in or should I" you ask. You already know your answer but you just wanna make him feel involved.

"I'll do it" he says stepping out of the car. You are really surprised he doesn't say anything to you. He seems kinda different when he's away from the crowd of his friends. You still don't like him though.

After being gone for seven minutes, sunho comes back with a file in his hand.

You tried to reach for it but he pulls it back.

"This is a job for the for the boys" and his lost his streak.

"Well read it out loud" you say not wanting to conversate with him much especially if it's not gonna be about the case.

"It's just some bank transactions between the kim company and Kim taehyung."

"Well that's boring, doesn't his father own the company anyways"

"No, his uncle owns it now" he informs you still going through the papers.

"Taehyung was supposed to inherit the company but his uncle ended up snatching it from him." This is the first time you've heard this news. You really don't involve yourself in corporate family drama.

"Do you really think he's part of the heists on the Kim company? " sunho looks at you like it's obvious but you're not staring at him to notice.

"That could be his motive." You come to a conclusion more to yourself.

"Yeah whatever" he says turning his attention back to the paper.

"Seems like this taehyung guy has been transferring money to different accounts in different countries."

"Do we know what for?

"No"

"Any names of the accounts his sending his money to. He might be sending money to his accomplices."

"But why would he do it from his own account if he doesn't want to draw attention to himself"

" who said he doesn't want to draw attention to himself"you say and sunho goes silent thinking.

"Give me the papers I want to look at them when I get back home." you stretch your hand for sunho to give you the papers but he doesn't.

"Who said you get to go home with them" you look at him with a confused look.

"Because I'm more invested in this than you are"

"Who said I'm not invested"

you reach out and try to snatch the file from him but he pulls away

"Sunho give me the papers"

" no"

You two too struggle for some time for the file until you finally grab them from him.

The drive back to the station is silent as you hold onto the file for dear life.

Once you get back to the station sunho goes back to his normal self making snarky comments about you. Such a wuss.

After that you decide to do a little more investigating on the case especially on Kim taehyung. You take your time to read previous findings from the other people on the case.

_______________________________

Jungkook is chilling on your couch drinking a smoothie he just made for himself when he gets a call from jin.

"Tell your little police friend to stop snooping around before she regrets it" jin says knowing jungkook has heard and is going to do as he says.

Jungkook doesn't say anything to him. He never really liked having conversations or interacting with jin cause he carries so many bad decisions that jungkook doesn't want to make but ends up making anyways.

_______________________________

You've been working and fixating on this case for two days now, not coming up with any leads only hypothesis.

A sensible person wouldn't openly share any money obtained from heists if he was involved. Maybe he wasn't involved in the case or maybe he is, maybe he's just the brains and not the muscle maybe he's creating a distraction. Why his own company though? to get to his uncle? but why? so many theories and so many unanswered questions.

You come down to the clever decision to go to the downtown side of town to see if anyone knew anything about taehyung. Everyone there knows about everything atleast even one person must know.

You go there in your personal car and regular clothes, which doesn't seem smart considering this side of town is the hotspot for criminal activities. But you go there with your badge and gun, that should be some kind of protection right?

You drive through the dark , eerie and pedestrian filled road. Even in broad daylight this place feels dark. You can see people stare at you and your car with looks you can't dissect but they're nothing friendly or welcoming.

You just wanna leave but you're here on a job so you can't. Your racing mind won't let you.

When you step out of your car after parking in some corner and locking it, you can feel all the haunting eyes people stare at you with. You look around, shoulders tensed and mind alert as you turn looking for a victim for your burning questions you aren't nervous or scared anymore and your body shows it.

"Nice car. What's it doing here?" You hear a man speak behind you and you turn sharply to find him tracing his fingers on the logo of your Mercedes. A gift you got from your family.

"Dont touch it" you sharply say immediately going to stand next to your car.

When he asks what a pretty girl and such a car are doing here, you show him your badge and he nods. It doesn't frighten him like you thought it would. He actually seems even more intrigued.

"What brings you here officer" he says not in the slightest bit sounding intimidated by you.

He's dressed in a black T-shirt and black slacks with his bleached hair styled to suit him. When he runs his hands through it you notice the silver rings that decorate his fingers and even the small silver chain that hangs around his neck, looks like some expensive stuff.

His dark Iris stare at you as you try to assert your dominance in this conversation. He looks like a guy who knows this place like the back of his hand he might be the one to help you.

"I'm looking for some information on Kim taehyung" you hope he might be the one to give them to you. Even though your question is a little bit direct you hope that the man isn't startled by it.

"Why is he in some trouble?"

"No just have some questions"

This side of town carried a lot of information about criminals and the like. So if taehyung is involved in the criminal activities somebody around here must know or even be working with him.

"Why are you coming around here? why not ask the man himself" he questions placing his hands into his dark pockets.

"I don't think he'd tell me business about his family, now would he?" you say smirking as you say that. You mimic the man's actions as you place your hands in your pockets as well.

"No I don't think he would" the man chuckles showing you his well arranged pearly white teeth.

"What's his relationship with his uncle" the man laughs at your evident curiosity.

He then begins to openly explain and when you hear that taehyung wasn't happy that his uncle had gotten the company and that he dispises his uncle you felt like you've heard enough.

"And is his uncle fond of taehyung?" you shift from one foot to the other as you take in the information.

"No" the man then leans into whisper something.

"He actually wants to run taehyung dry of his assets"

you feel like you're being fooled because how can someone know so much about a high ranked business man's personal life. Seems like they don't hide their business well.

"I think that will be all, thank you..." as you turn to go to your car, you turn back to the man who's still standing there watching you with a dark glare that makes you uneasy.

"And what's the name of the man giving me this information?" You watch the man intently.

"Jin" he says bluntly.

"Thank you jin" you thank him.

"Anytime" jin says giving you a warm smile which you return awkwardly. He watches your car drive away as you feel satisfied with the answers he's given you.

______________________________

Jungkook curses under his breath at the sound of your feet against the floor. He's had to listen to this for over five hours and he's started to lose it.

A few minutes earlier he had brought the issue to you but you used your 'it's my house' card again. He knows it's your house it kills his ears whenever you remind him. But couldn't you spare his sanity on this one.

You've been busting your ass for two days every after work to work on this case. And even if jin's answers didn't make a break for the case, they definitely put you on a path to make more hypothesise.

The heists are mainly targeted at the Kim companies and any company in association with them so maybe taehyung is involved, because he's trying to get his uncle to step down due to the pressure and frustration of being the number one target of the heists

And unless he does step down you don't think taehyung will stop.

"Don't you think you've been working on this for a little too long." Jungkook says leaning against the door frame to your office or the room you like to work in.

The pen in your hand is stuck to the paper scribbling some connections, your eyes following each movement it makes.

You can feel jungkook move from the door and slowly walking towards you as he looks around the room. He takes in everything he sees. He always knew you were the organized reading type but two bookshops filled with books that's a bit much. Have you even read any of these.

His eyes run across all your achievements hung up on the wall, then he notices the gold medal hanging on the wall. He remembers this one you won it at the spelling competition. Jungkook wonders why they even held that competition.

That was the only time you beat jungkook. Yeah jungkook beat you when you it came to physicals but he could never beat you when it comes to books. It's not like he's not smart he actually is even earning himself and his school first place in the International School quizzes, when he was in high school. But there's just something that you have that he doesn't and even if you didn't capitalize on your intelligence in high school, because of your fear and shyness, you still had it and worked on it on your own at home.

Your dad would always push you to join these competitions but you never did. Your mother would always tell him to leave you alone and that you weren't ready.

Do you regret it, kind of. But you don't blame me yourself too much you had so much fear and doubt in you.

"Still sulking on how I beat you" you say noticing him looking at the medal. He chuckles turning his body towards you.

"No I knew you'd beat me" you don't say anything surprised by his confession.

"You're a smart girl y/n" he says smirking at you. Looking at him with suspicion you don't say anything wondering when he's gonna throw in an insult to make you feel less, but he doesn't. He simply stares at you noticing the shock on your face.

"What? surprised that I can actually have nice things to say" you continue to stare at him as he is eyes the papers on your desk related to the Kim case.

You nod "yeah I am" he laughs at that finally stopping in front of your desk and staring at you.

"Take a Break I made some brownies" he says not sounding like himself which makes you suspicious and confused. Jungkook sees it on your face. Since when did jungkook start baking and even inviting you to come eat with him.

"Come on I'm just trying to be kind to the person who took me in on that rainy night" you roll your eyes at his cringe.

"And who knows they might be better than yoongi's"

Pfft.

When he says that you scoff and stand up deciding you do need a break anyways, but also you really need to see if they might be better than yoongi's.

You walk to the door with jungkook standing by your desk.

"Well let's go" you say watching him and waiting at the door.

"Yeah right behind you" he taps his fingers against the wood of your desk as you nod and walk out to go to the kitchen.

Shortly after jungkook follows and walks behind you and quickly rushes to pull out the brownies he made.

They certainly don't look better than yoongi's and after tasting them you can definitely say they don't taste better than yoongi's.

They don't taste that bad, but if you got these at a bakery you'd be asking for a refund.

_______________________________

You're standing stiff feeling the tears about to fall. But you don't let them you don't even let the chief and sunho, who's yelling, know or tell that you want to cry.

"I warned you chief that she would fuck this up" he preaches walking around as he complains.

"That's why I didn't want you to have them, I knew you'd lose them."

You can't even stand up for yourself because you're in the wrong. It's your fault and the last person you'd want to admit that to is sunho and even if you don't want to admit it he's probably right. Maybe you shouldn't have kept them. But you didn't think anything like this would happen.

"Maybe someone broke into my house" you finally say your tone quiet and sorrowful.

But there weren't any signs of a break in when you searched every inch of your house.

You're neighborhood is one of the safest neighborhoods in town, if not first place in safety. That's why you wanted to move there. So you doubt someone would break into your house to just steal that one folder, because that's the only thing that was missing including the vase you got from your grandmother.

"You're just making excuses" sunho scoffs "fucking bitch" you hear him mumble. And before you say what your heart wants to say the chief steps in.

All this time he's been quiet listening to you and sunho argue but mostly sunho just rumbling.

"Enough sunho" he says towards sunho who immediately shuts up to your amusement.

"Now y/n tell me what happened"

You explain everything to him, except jungkook. You didn't mention him because he had told you he didn't want anyone who knows him to know that he was living with you. That brought up some questions on your side but he didn't answer them, only vaguely telling you that one of the bar fight guys might still want to fight him. Which still doesn't make sense to you but you respect his wishes wanting to investigate him yourself.

Prev | next

#fanfic #jungkook #jeon jungguk #jungkook x reader #jungkook x y/n #jungkook fanfic #jeon jungkook #bts jungkook #jungkook imagine #jeon jeongguk #jeongguk #jungkook angst #jungkook fluff #jeon jungkoooook #jungkook au #bts jungguk

[diagonal-queen]

HI I LOVE YOUR WRITING SM HAKSHWKDHKSH 😭😭

SINCE YOURE DOING REQUESTS CAN YOU PLS PLS WRITE SMTH ABT FIRST KISS WITH CHUUYA AAA IT CAN BE A DRABBLE OR HEADCANONS OR ANYTHING, ID ACCEPT ANYTHING PLS IM ON MY KNEES I WILL GIVE YOU COOKIES

THANK YOU SO MUCH ANON!! ALSO YOU DO NOT HAVE TO GIVE ME ANYTHING FOR ME TO WRITE FOR YOU. YOU COULD SAY 'DIA WRITE ME THIS OR I WILL LITERALLY KILL YOU' AND I'D BE LIKE 'YES MASTER :D'. THAT BEING SAID I'M SURE YOUR COOKIES ARE DELICIOUS <3

Mutually Beneficial Transaction

♡ pairing: Chuuya Nakahara x gn!Reader

♡ synopsis: After not seeing each other for a while, you and Chuuya spend the day together. It gets a little more romantic than you expected.

♡ wc: 1.4k

♡ cw: Swearing, mentions of death.

note: I'm so, SO sorry that this took so long to complete anon. This was one of the first reqs I got and I feel like I've let you down T-T I had a bunch of different ideas for this but not a clue which one to use- hopefully you like the end result though <3 Apologies for errors, hope you enjoy x

Most people would see you and Chuuya as you were out and about and make the assumption that you were on a date. After all, you were dragging him from place to place, a couple clothes bags dangling from your free arm while he followed you with a fond smile on his face. You didn't have any issues with this, but it certainly wasn't the case. However, if it were, you're sure you would have been all over Chuuya and vice versa.

Yokohama was well known to be a city teeming with crime, specifically at the hands of the notorious Port Mafia of which Chuuya was an executive. You weren't a member yourself but you didn't feel as if you had anything to fear being close with Chuuya. You assumed that since you'd known each other for so long that you had some form of immunity. That being said, it had been a while since you were able to spend any personal time with him.

That's the reason that, on a rare day off, Chuuya called you to meet him at a nearby cafe for breakfast to spend the day with you. Feeling a little lonely without him, you were more than happy to participate. Thus, you spent the day running around Yokohama with Chuuya doing a multitude of things- shopping, trying different foods, and the like. Doing couple-y things, you thought. The question of whether or not Chuuya was at all like-minded lingered in the back of your head most of the day.

Around mid-evening before dinner, you and Chuuya found yourselves a bench near the port and took your seats, letting your arms rest from the bags they'd been carrying, and your feet rest from taking you so many places. The sunset setting on the horizon was a bright orange, the sky a calming ombre of shades of pink and blue.

"Today was brilliant, Chuuya," you breathed, a serene smile gracing your face as you absorbed the view. "Thank you for all this."

"It's nothin', really," he sighed, brushing a stray ginger lock from his face. "I'm just glad you were happy."

"You're way too nice to me. You know I won't be able to repay you- at least not like this?" You cocked an eyebrow at him, with a chuckle.

"I don't care about that. You spending time with me is payment enough." Chuuya glanced over at you with a smile. "I'm glad I got to hang out with you today."

"It really has been a while, huh?" You mused. "Things are busy in the mafia right now, I guess?"

"Things are technically always busy there, but because I'm an executive I have a lot more shit to do than most other members." He explained.

"That's also why you're so fuckin' loaded, I guess." You joked. The man beside you let out a snicker. "Seriously, though, just because you make a lot doesn't mean you always need to spend it on me."

"It's honestly fine, hon. I mean it. Besides, I kinda like buying you stuff." When you tilted your head at him as if to ask for further explanation, he elaborated. "You always get so excited whenever I get you a gift. It's nice knowing that I'm able to make you happy."

"You make me happy whenever I see you, regardless of whether you buy me things!" You insisted, shifting towards him and earnestly taking his gloved hand in your own. "I like spending time with you! I wouldn't be your friend if I didn't, you know."

"...yeah." He squeezed your hand. "...hey, can I ask you something?"

"Of course, Chuuya."

"Have you been feeling lonely recently?" The question surprised you, because it seemed rather random and uncharacteristic coming from Chuuya. You turned to face him.

"I mean...I guess, a little. It's been kinda lonely not having you around. Sometimes I got worried that you'd died or something," you admitted, your voice quiet.

"Died? Me?" Chuuya asked, making you giggle.

"I know, I know. Even God wouldn't be able to kill you. But I really couldn't help but worry. I'm glad to have been able to spend today with you. I like knowing that you're alright," you cast him a genuine smile, "and I had a great time. Did you?"

"'Course I did. I was with you." Chuuya responded returning your beam. You tapped your lips and weakly swatted at him.

"Shush, you."

"Now that I think of it, I did kinda miss messing with you." Chuuya leaned forward as his eyes narrowed.

"You're so damn sadistic, Chuuya. No wonder you're a mafia exec- that title suits you to a tee," you scoffed, pushing your finger into his forehead. "I can't even catch a break when I'm on your good side."

"Don't complain, you have it pretty easy with me."

"Whatever helps you sleep at night." You rolled your eyes. "Cheeky..."

"Who's cheeky?" Chuuya raised an eyebrow. You leaned forward to reach his eye level, both of you staring one another down. You smirked at him.

"The one spending all his money on me so that he can mess with me, maybe?" You suggested, with a small head tilt. The pair of you shared a quick chuckle, before it suddenly dawned on you how close you were to Chuuya.

You took note of how soft his glove felt on your hand, and how his breath danced across your face. The air around you suddenly seemed hot and sticky. You could hear your heartbeat in your temples.

"...you know what?" Chuuya spoke softly. "If you wanna repay me, maybe there's one thing you can do..."

Your eyes flickered towards his lips. "Yeah?"

"Mhm. You don't have to do it if you don't want to...but I'd appreciate it a lot."

"Anything for you, Chuuya," you breathed.

"Is that right?"

"Of course..." You had mentally prepared for this moment for years, and you felt a surprising amount of confidence. Though, that was mostly because Chuuya seemed to be returning your...very fervid attitude. You were both quiet, the only sounds being your slightly wavering breaths. Your faces were barely centimetres apart now.

"In that case..." you inhaled and closed your eyes in anticipation, quickly melting into his touch when your lips connected.

Chuuya did feel warm, and you felt a tingle in your chest. Your first kiss with Chuuya was better than you'd expected; not only did Chuuya meet all of your expectations but he also seemed equally interested in kissing you. You could only assume, anyway, when Chuuya's fingers found their way beneath your chin and gently lifted your face up so he could better access your lips.

The moment felt fleeting. When Chuuya pulled away you wanted to take his face and keep kissing him, but you didn't. That would probably shock him. You opened your eyes to see Chuuya's blue ones boring into yours. His face was relaxed, if a little flushed.

"Oh...oh, you're good at kissing..." You practically mouthed, you were so quiet. Chuuya couldn't hold back his laugh at your expression.

"How kind of you."

"No, like-!" You huffed, pushing him away from you. "You are a sadist."

"Nah, not to you," he shook his head. You didn't know what to say to him. Chuuya let out a relenting exhale. "I can be if you want me to be."

"...yeah. To be honest, you'd kinda lose half your charisma if you weren't." After saying that, he gave you a frown. You stifled a giggle.

"I'm the cheeky one?"

"Yes, you are. But I think I prefer it that way," you smiled. Chuuya truly couldn't get enough of it.

"I think...and you be quiet," he began, pointing a stern finger towards you. "...I think you and I are a good match. Dating-wise."

"You don't say?" You teased.

"Y/N, I'm being serious here," he insisted, taking your hand once more. "Can I be your boyfriend?"

"...yes?!" You raised an eyebrow. "I wouldn't have kissed you if the answer was no? You dense idiot, Chuuya."

"My apologies for making sure I wasn't dragging you into something you didn't want," he rolled his eyes. You laced your fingers together, before lifting your joined hands and pressing a kiss to the back of his hand. His gaze softened. "...thanks, hon."

"Seriously, though, I actually won't be able to spoil you or anything like that, so are you really sure you wanna date me?" You asked.

Chuuya sighed in exasperation. "I'm cuttin' you off if you keep this shit up, Y/N."

"Okay, okay!"

i'm kinda tempted to write something now based on my first kiss because imo it was CRAZY romantic, but i don't wanna disrespect the person with whom i shared said kiss. if you're reading this; hey man do i have permission to write a loose recount of what we did except instead of us it's like some fictional people? i will give you a creative credit for worldbuilding

#bsd #bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs #x reader #bsd x reader #bungo stray dogs x reader #fanfic #fanfiction #bsd fanfiction #bsd fanfic #bungo stray dogs fanfiction #bsd chuuya #chuuya nakahara #chuuya x reader #chuuya nakahara x reader #bsd oneshot #bsd fluff

[fuck-customers]

On another addition of “this is why we ask for your email” on 7/4. This woman comes in to do a return but couldn’t find the physical receipt anywhere in her bag/house/etc, and didn’t use her email when she purchased it even though we already have her email in the system. And I can’t do a cc lookup because she just called to cancel it this morning, and had it frozen yesterday, due to fraudulent charges, so the numbers won’t work anymore. Thankfully the item was bought at my location, so it was possible to look up the transaction history, but she literally had to call her bank to get the info on the date, time of purchase, etc so we could narrow it down. Both myself and a manger end up looking through the transaction history of the entire day because the time was completely off, the bank said 11:29am but it was actually from 2:30pm. BUT. All of this could have been avoided if it was linked to her email (that we already have) just in case she lost the receipt. Like. This shit ain’t for marketing (I mean kinda but mostly not, we can uncheck marketing emails when signing you up), it’s because everyone always seems to throw away the paper receipts anyway, it’s so much easier for BOTH of us.

Posted by admin Rodney.

[a-god-in-ruins-rises]

western women get a lot of flak for being too independent or "masculine" but it always makes me think of spartan women. i think about that quote: "why are spartan women the only women who rule their men" and queen gorgo says it's because "spartan women are the only women who give birth to real men." i think plutarch also mentions that spartan men were always obedient to their wives.

or as socrates put it (quoted by xenophon): "It is the example of the rider who wishes to become an expert horseman: 'None of your soft-mouthed, docile animals for me,' he says; 'the horse for me to own must show some spirit' in the belief, no doubt, if he can manage such an animal, it will be easy enough to deal with every other horse besides. And that is just my case. I wish to deal with human beings, to associate with man in general; hence my choice of wife. I know full well, if I can tolerate her spirit, I can with ease attach myself to every human being else."

and i think there's a lot of truth to this. i think cultures with spirited, independent women are made stronger by it, for a number of reasons. and i think it actually plays a major role in western civilization's success. a strong-willed man and a strong-willed woman working together in union is an incredibly strong foundation for a family and a civilization.

and i don't want to give the impression that the west was ever some kind of gender-egalitarian utopia. but i do think a significant degree of respect for women is a common feature in western civilization (and i'd say broader indo-european culture too). at least compared to other civilizations. and especially in the prechristian and, now, the postchristian eras (though i'd say it even bleeds through in the christian era in some ways too). i mean there's a reason why feminism first blossomed in the west and not elsewhere.

but yeah, this desire for some docile, obedient slave-wife seems to be very contrary to the spirit of western civilization. i mean, it seemed like the default view of women in prechristian europe, for better or worse, was that women were these wild, powerful, passionate, promiscuous creatures who needed to be tamed. and yes, women were expected to be loyal and amenable/agreeable to their husbands but this is hardly unreasonable and is a far cry from the obedient slave-wife some people propose as an ideal (namely traditional christians and muslims and the like).

"women should be banned from doing manual labor" -- traditionally, women did all sorts of manual labor. medieval peasant women would be working in the fields just like the men. and even if they weren't working a field there would be plenty of other physically taxing jobs they'd be doing. not saying that women should be encouraged to do extremely dangerous or physically taxing jobs, but if they're able to more power to them. and i kinda detest this desire to portray women as frail and incapable. they are the weaker sex but they're not weak. let's not infantilize them.

also, western women generally marry out of love and commitment and view themselves (rightfully) as partners in union with their husbands. whereas these types of women (the woman who made this post) believe women's sole purpose is to be obedient little decorations who do nothing but sit around and look pretty (and maybe have babies if she's very traditional -- but often you won't even get that!) while the man just gives her money. it's transactional and superficial. there's no real love or partnership. it's not a good foundation for a family or a civilization.

anyway, belated happy women's day.

#i actually have so much more to say about this but i'd be here all day #i was also gonna talk about women in latino cultures too #and how simpish the men can be #and yet latino men are viewed as very masculine #and objectively they have some of the highest rates of testosterone #but yeah if you are latino and live around latinos then you know that their women have a reputation for being very not-submissive lmao #and yes i generally consider latin america part of western civilization #at least at the periphery of it

[feather314]

How did Markus get the suit?

Ok so I was trying really hard to fall asleep last night so that maybe just maybe I could get more than 5 hours of sleep and so I was thinking, naturally, as one does, about Markus, specifically the Stratford Tower heist thing. He looked really good in that suit. But how did he get it?? Suits are expensive and I know he didn't sit on a street corner asking for spare change until he could afford it.

Maybe he stole it? Very plausible, but to me that seems like a lot of effort and risk just for the costume that he'll ditch above a ceiling tile after like 10 minutes anyway.

Found it lying around or 'borrowed' it from someone's locker/closet? Same thing with the stealing, breaking in somewhere to steal a suit just doesn't seem like a smart risk to take. And where would you find a fancy shmancy suit (that is also, might I add, his perfect exact size) just lying around?

Surely he didn't have it already. He might have needed to dress fancy for some event with Carl or something, but we saw him come home from one of those and he was not in a suit. So it wouldn't make sense to me that he would have one just in case.

So that brings me to the conclusion that I came to in my brain-dead midnight daze last night. He purchased it. But not with money he scrounged from the sidewalk. He used Carl's money.

We know he's connected to Carl's bank account and can make transactions without his "owner's" (ew) authorization because of the Bellini paints scene. He just kinda did it. And this was before he made his message to the world (duh, it's in preparation for Stratford Tower), so the general public probably wouldn't recognize him like they might do for, say, Kara, since she was wanted for committing a crime. I don't think that was the case with Markus at this point. (Although I fully accept that I may be incorrect on that particular factoid, or any aspect of this 'theory.')

All this to say, I think the most plausible explanation for how he came to acquire a suit is that he put on a normal android uniform (which I'm sure would be in abundant supply in Jericho), moseyed on into a Men's Wearhouse (he didn't hide his lack of an LED in Stratford Tower whilst posing as an android employee, so we can assume he also wouldn't need to here), operated under the guise that the suit was for his "owner" (again, ew), and got the suit the correct size for himself. He would then complete the transaction with the (assumedly) android cashier (and if this was the case, he could always deviate the cashier if anything went wrong) using money, and probably a lot of it, from Carl's bank account. So he stole it from Carl.

And depending on the timeline, Carl would be either very ill or dead. Both are awful to steal from. But I guess the revolution is more important. Carl has plenty of money anyway.

My apologies if they actually did explain it or hint at it in the game. It was late when I thought of this and I probably forgot some crucial details. But it was fun to think of Markus strolling into a men's store to buy a suit.

#dbh #detroit become human #markus rk200 #dbh markus #rk200 #detroit: bh #fan theory #i guess this counts as a fan theory #this is my first post so forgive my inability to use tags correctly

[zevranunderstander]

one thing abt bg3 and I don't know if I'm making sense here but I just can't get myself to really care about astarion and gale, because they're both just dragon age characters with less edge and intrigue to them

gale is the caring, bookish, very domestic and romantic, cat-loving, bisexual mage that anders from da2 is, and both their stories have them commit a thing they personally deem as unforgivable and end up in a very suicidal state for parts of their respective story. but where anders' story was probably the most defining arc of the whole franchise, gale's feels so safe and bland in comparison? we don't really see much of gale's story and character development on screen, we just see him struggle with the aftermath of his backstory, while dragon age 2 on the other hand had you watch anders' entire character development from a just-escaped self-centred mage, to a caring healer with revolutionary tendencies, to a person who has become so fed up with the political landscape that he blows up a church

like, dragon age actually asked real questions with anders' storyline, and genuinely sympathized with his reasons for committing an act of terrorism (I'm ignoring inquisition on purpose) and bg3 just feels like a very shallow copy of a trope of character?

and for some reason this irks me even worse, but astarion is just. zevran and fenris mashed together into The Most Marketable Romance Option. Astarion feels to me, like someone did market research on how to make the most well-beloved character. And funnily enough, whenever at least I see a poll on dragon age romances on here, zevran and fenris are ALWAYS the two top contenders, and their stories are similar, but still both really meaningfully deep to me in a way that I just *couldn't* connect with with astarion's storyline.

I don't mean to say that the game doesn't use these themes, but astarion is a vampire, because romancing vampires sells, and he is sassy and funny and bitchy, because that sells, and he is white (as opposed to fenris and zevran) because that is a lot safer and more marketable than him being a character of color. He is an elf, because romancing elves sells. I genuinely even believe that the reason astarion is a rogue is because zevran is a rogue and because rogues are 'sexy', just because I just don't think the class really fits him all that much and there could have been way more compelling classes he could have been (like a bard who's based on seduction, his backstory doesn't really explain why he's a rogue?). His plotline is so heavily overlapping with two really beloved dragon age characters, probably also because the story felt really safe and 'proven'.

And I do think that astarion's storyline stands on it's own, but it brings so little new stuff to the table. the idea to use vampirism as a stand-in for his oppression was cool, and that astarion's storyline interacts with other victims of his abuser (which zevran's and fenris' storylines didn't do very much) was really nice, and I did like the choice for the endings because astarion has both more agency than the other two characters but he also has worse choices. but that's kinda it? it just feels like astarion's plotline is a a bit more developed version of zevran's and fenris' plotlines?

zevran and fenris both have a former master hunting them, and explicitly were slaves before escaping and both struggle with the fear of "am I really free?", and the looming threat that their master is actually hunting them - and the group they just joined. and due to their life full of abuse (in both cases sexual abuse is at least implied) they have tremendous problems with intimacy and vulnerability. zevran's storyline EXPLICITLY is about how he had to use sex all of his life to survive and sees it as entirely transactional and you need to actually get to know him better to realise he's not sleeping with you because he likes you all that much, but because he *doesn't want you to fucking kill him* and sees this as a way to come across as more likeable and trustworthy. zevran is also entirely desensitized with the combination of sex and murder specifically, because he is an assassin, who used sex to survive. both have tattoos given to them to show that they are property, but fenris' tattoos are also magical inscriptions that are key to his master's power and his master would hunt him to the end of the world to get him back, because of the tattoos.

and this is just kind of a personal opinion, but astarion being a white character felt for these comparisons alone like chickening out and 'playing it safe'. there is no way in hell that the writers of bg3 were not aware of these two characters specifically, because, you know, dragon age is literally the biggest other franchise of their genre. and you cannot tell me that the way astarion is written was a total accident, because you do not by accident write a copy of two of the most well-beloved romances of the fantasy RPG genre. and baldur's gate 3 is kind of sparse about the companions' racial diversity in general, and then them copying over the blueprint to two characters of color and making their character white - the character they make the most content for and put on all the marketing - just feels so personally rude to me. especially because the only actual character of color they have on their roster has half of the content that astarion has, and generally seems like an "oops we forgot to add a character of color" character last minute addition, who wasn't even really part of the early access tests apparently

#myposts #i dont really wanna tag this as the fandom because like i dont wanna start shit but like. these 2 characters especially piss me off #because they are just copies of characters that are kinda better than they are?

[yifftwiceplz]

[ Years in the future, but not many… ]

[ +10 to be precise]

“Is it really that crazy to think I don’t want to lose you?”

“I don’t know what you expect Dave,” Karkat sighs, and pinches the bridge of his nose, “it’s not like I can go down to the hospital and get mortality reassignment surgery.”

“We still have access to the rest of the omniverse. You know I don’t ask the council for jack shit, and you know they love you. We could find a blood quest bed if we just looked around.”

Karkat throws his head back and groans. “You seriously want to risk infecting the universe we worked so hard to protect with another Jack Noir or Lord English? Or some other unknowable horror? Just for this?”

“Just for this?” Dave raises his voice slightly, despite the shakiness permeating his body. “Our marriage, which you so fuckin' casually gesture and refer to as ‘this’, is everything to me, just in case that wasn’t extremely god damn obvious.”

Karkat narrows his eyes at Dave in a cold glare. “Don’t twist my words. Don’t try to make it sound like I don’t care about our marriage, Dave. That’s not fucking fair and you know it.” He spits, making an effort to bite back tears.

Dave remains silent.

Karkat continues. “Has it not occurred to you, even once, just once, that I don’t want to live forever?”

“Has it not occurred to you that I also don’t want to live forever? Especially if it’s without you?” Dave retorts.

“Oh!” Karkat throws his hands up. ���So I’m the lucky one, because I get to die early!”

“Kinda, yeah!” Dave shouts, hands visibly shaking. “You fucking asshole. How do you expect me to take it knowing every day I get a little closer to watching your health decline?? To watching you fade away. Going to your corpse party. And then coming back to our house, alone.” His voice cracks.

Karkat remains silent.

After a long, pregnant pause in the conversation, Dave wordlessly puts on houseslippers and a hoodie.

“Where the hell are you going.” Questions a deflated Karkat.

“I gotta get some air.” Dave mutters to himself. He exits, restraining himself from slamming the door when he hears Karkat call his name. He turns his phone off and shoves it in his back pocket.

Dave stops at a cornerstore for some cigarettes and a cappuccino. Normally he’d mix all the flavors. He barely has the heart to push the buttons and talk to the cashier. He notes Karkat is usually one to facilitate transactions.

He chooses to walk. Kind of annoying to smoke and have coffee while you’re flying around like Superman. Not that he has a solid plan for where he’s walking. The urge to get out of the house provided enough fuel to walk to the gas station, and beyond that, he’s acting on pure impulse. He naturally finds himself wandering through the park to Dirk’s apartment.

Dirk answers the light rapping on the door almost instantly; does this dude ever sleep? Dave makes a note to hound him about that when he’s not in the middle of a fight with Karkat.

“Sup.” He says flatly.

“Sup.” Dave responds flatly. “Wanna go to Vegas?”

There’s barely a moment of pause before Dirk points out the obvious.

“Are you and Karkat fighting?”

Dave sulks, somehow expecting Dirk to not put 2 and 2 together. Or at least not comment.

 “Do you want to talk about it on the way to Vegas or not.”

“... Yeah, ok. Do you want clothes?”

Dave looks down to check his fit. He admits to himself it’s a bit dumpy. It’s then he notices the grey symbol on the chest - he’d grabbed Karkat’s hoodie. His heart sinks in his chest and he flinches. Anyone other than his family wouldn’t have noticed. “No,” Dave voicecracks. After a moment he adds, “It’s Vegas right? Who cares.”

Dirk, equally dumpy looking, blinks owlishly behind his shades and gives a light shrug. “Are we taking the car or flying?”

Dave dumps his empty coffee cup in the apartment dumpster. “I know it’s a pain in the ass but can we take the car? I like the rumbling. And I don’t want my eyes to be dry as shit when I get there.”

“Yeah, of course.” Thank fuck for Dirk always being down to clown.

Within ten minutes, the Striders are loaded up in Dirk’s car with an itinerary, westbound and down.

#editor's art #fics go in the art tag

[travelingneuritis]

kinnporsche ep. 4 part 2: Permeability Of Porsche

-big didn’t set porsche up to get caught skulking around kinn’s room, he just told him to make the delivery. so either he was expecting porsche to just get an eyeful and maybe a telling off, or he (correctly) guessed that porsche wouldn’t pass up this opportunity to be nosy-- which imo you can’t blame big for. but then porsche has this outsize reaction to what he just saw (only when he’s safely out of the room, of course) and scolds big for it, and big... looks like he feels kinda bad? like he’s aware he did something spiritually dickish if not technically wrong? i’m not going anywhere with this is just think big is an interesting character; on first watch i guessed he was the mole and didn’t suspect the INCREDIBLY SUS australian, but in retrospect i think i was just so fascinated by him that i assumed he had a more central role than he did. also, big is really cute and i like his hair :)

-let’s talk about porsche’s outsize reaction to seeing his boss getting head! on one level i think his stress response is purely professional; his worries about getting fired are ramping up as he comes to realize how dangerous this job is and how catastrophically bad it would be to piss these people off. on another level, however, this revelation sends him into a tailspin as he revisits every encounter he’s ever had with kinn and wonders what secret insinuations he missed just because it didn’t occur to him to look for them. he even reverse-represses the memory of getting kissed by his boss while he was blackout drunk! oof.

-which leads me to my next point, about where i think porsche’s head is at right now. it is very very tempting to take this as his first little micro-awakening-- “oh, we kissed. oh, he’s gay. I saw someone sucking his dick and it made me go all squirmy in my bathing suit area!” but i don’t think that’s what’s happening at all. For one thing, porsche may have a bit of tunnel vision, but he’s not exactly sheltered: when he confronts big after the fact, and big tries to corner him into admitting something incriminating about himself and his views on The Gays (i assume big is aware that kinn is standing in earshot), porsche’s response is basically: “are you stupid? who cares if he’s gay? i’m mad because i got caught in his room while he had company.” his concern there is mostly professional, with a side of rapidly decreasing patience for big’s hazing.

-the reason for this is, i think, related to one of the few things kinnporsche have in common: to both of them, sex is always transactional. in kinn’s case the transaction is explicit and financial-- he literally just has a list of guys he pays to come service him, the same way you’d pay a mechanic to take a look at a, idk, broken transmission. (If you tell me those guys aren’t on his payroll one way or another, i won’t believe you.) the guy he calls to help him deal with his porsche problem is aware of this, but also doesn’t seem terribly curious about it-- he’s here to help kinn fuck the wiggles out, not to be his boyfriend. 

Porsche’s hookups seem to be more implicitly transactional, folded artfully into his work in the service industry. They’re probably at least a little fun for him, but the way Yok points out prospective hookups makes me think sleeping with the customers is soft-coded into his work duties. he is part of what’s being offered at Hum Bar. if he enjoys these encounters, so much the better-- but the important thing is that the customers leave happy. this is not to say that i think he’s a sex worker, exactly-- just that it’s part of a culture in which the sex he’s having is tied up with profit, so there’s no way for him to navigate pure personal desire uncoupled from a paycheck.

which isn’t exactly made less complicated by his sudden awareness that his boss might have been interested in him from the beginning. i think when he nervously asks pete if it’s normal for people who don’t like each other to kiss, he’s partly looking for pete to confirm what he now pretty much knows, which is that his boss wants to fuck him. but i also think there’s a part of him that’s asking what it means that he kissed back. 

(pete’s answer is so good and so cute, too. his little kissy-fish face. the way he assuages porsche’s discomfort with sincerity safely bundled up in humor, even though he doesn’t totally get where that discomfort is coming from. in this house we respect pete.)

i’m not surprised that the next time porsche finds himself alone in a room with kinn, he doesn’t know where to look or what to do with his hands. He left Hum Bar but it turns out his paycheck may still depend upon him letting someone fuck him, whether he wants them to or not. God, and then that conversation where kinn is like “tankhun gave you back to me out of spite,” wow, we get it, porsche has no agency in this place, he doesn’t even own his own ass (figurative) or his own ass (literal). no fucking wonder he can barely make eye contact with kinn! but then, unwillingly, like he can’t believe he’s saying this, he asks kinn if kinn really wanted him back. at this point he’s figured out that he wants kinn to want him, sexually or professionally or just as company, while simultaneously feeling completely helpless in the face of kinn’s-- and kinn’s family’s-- wants. god, and then kinn just gives him the cruelest possible answer: “to me, all you people are the same.” fucccck it hurts, i love this shit

and after all that, he’s drugged, his boss first rescues and then gets him alone and forcibly strips him, and like.. porsche just kinda... makes up his mind all at once. his boss making a move on him isn’t all that different from yok pointing out a customer in the corner, so his willingness to go along with it is similarly well-trod territory-- maybe even comforting in its familiarity. this is something he can do drunk, or drugged; this is something he could do in his sleep. why not just let kinn have what he wants, when kinn saved him, when kinn is being so nice? it’s a better end to the night than the porsche of a half hour ago thought he’d be getting. porsche doesn’t know whether he wants it too, but that’s okay: right now, he doesn’t have to know. he’s just doing his job.

listen, i’m not here to moralize. this scene is hot, i like their dynamic and i respect the character choices being made here. they only know how to come together in a way that’s supported by their preexisting framework of transactional sex and desire. to porsche, this is a familiar dance. (what will not be familiar is the way he feels about it during and after. Clearly, the sex he was having with customers was not on the same level as the sex he has with kinn.)

-i do want to briefly touch on kinn’s pov in all this. we know he’s used to getting freshly-washed, perfumed, petal-scented loverboys who know all the rules and come to him all wrapped up with a bow. this is... not that. porsche is fading in and out of it, he's sweaty and unshowered and he just threw up on kinn’s jacket, and now he’s acting like a childish brat, like he doesn’t even know how serious this is. this is a really weird hookup for kinn. almost as if it’s......... not really a hookup at all.

#please guys please talk to me about this. i am screaming inside i love this episode there is SO MUCH to digest #i hate auction-house scenes i always skip them #i also hate live music scenes and skip those too #i skipped a lot this episode! still managed to not shut up for even a second about it :) #call me Porsche Pachara Kittisawasd the way i (word) vomit every episode #kinnporsche #porsche pachara kittisawasd #pete saengtham #kinnporsche episode analysis #spoilers #kinn theerapanyakul

[claudiajcregg]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Tagged by both @mihrsuri and @unseenacademic 💜💜💜 Thank you so much! I actually wrote up most of the answers the day I was tagged, and then forgot to post them. For over 10 days, probably. Me bad.

1. How many works do you have on Ao3? 23! (One of them is a 'collection' of short ficlets, and has 6 chapters. So 28 stories in 23 works so far. Probably about to be more stories in still 23 works.)

2. What's your total Ao3 word count? 156,597 words. For now.

3. What fandoms do you write for? Currently? Just TWW. Who knows in the future!

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

They have about 35% of my total kudos, but the first two are ~21% alone. (The first one is the only fic that has over 100 kudos. Then again, any of them getting above 30 is a miracle.)

maybe everything's just turning out how it should be (Big Block of Cheese 2008; CJ & Josh. Posted Feb 2021) [121]

say it's here where our pieces fall in place (Vignettes, 1998-2008. Posted Jan 2022.) [66]

just your smile lit a sixty-watt bulb in my house that was darkened for days (Thanksgiving 2006. Posted Dec 2022.) [55]

nobody knows how to get back home (Missing scene from ITSOTG. Posted April 2023) (wait what. top 4?!) [50]

we could be the way forward and I know I'll pay for it (B4A Campaign Fic, spring 1998. Posted May 2021) [47]

5. Do you respond to comments?

YES. I don't take them for granted, and I like interacting with my readers. Sharing is nerve-wracking and makes me feel so exposed, so any comment makes it worth it. I like to thank peeps for their time! As of late, it's taking me weeks to get back to comments for Brain/spoons reasons (and because I try to do so in order, though not always). I sometimes feel bad I have fallen behind on leaving my own comments, so replying to what I get makes me feel bad. I love getting the rare, long, thoughtful comments, because I love seeing what people pick up on (had to restrain myself from commenting on everything), so if that one's up next… It'll delay everything. I have a harder time letting go of those.

I know replying or not is a hot topic, and I fall on the side of 'whatever the author does is fine' (I see them as being voluntary gifts to the author, kinda, but I understand why some authors can't or won't reply! Especially those who get dozens.). It does feel weird(ly demoralizing) when you see that yours is one of a couple of comments they haven't replied to, though. (Selfishly, as someone who tries to write medium-long comments, lack of anything can sting. It's irrational, it's not what I'm after, but it'd be nice to know whether that hour plus of my time was worth it. It's not transactional and I hate that c4c idea or whatever. Just. weird feelings.)

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

As we've established in previous similar memes (lol, I think I've answered these questions before), my fics don't really have angsty endings! For the most part. I think I said don't want you to go but I'll be okay then, and I can still buy that/definitely popped into my brain. I think some of my late S7 fics have an ominous feel to them, with some references/buildup to the angsty parts of IM, but I wouldn't call them angsty endings.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Um. The opposite is true! still you never took your hand from mine was my first thought, but I feel like oh, and I will be with you to feel the California sun is pretty darn happy. I could have picked almost any of them and I could make a case for them!

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I luckily do not. I have gotten a couple of comments that have messed with my brain, and made me second-guess things, but they were not hate.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes, but not regularly and not that well. It's usually short, mild scenes at most, but I did challenge myself to write a more explicit one last summer, especially after I got those 'one bed' tropes in the Wheel but didn't go there in the 500-word limit. Streets say it's hot. IDK. I also wrote a smutty continuation to the exchange fic. Best if we forget parts of that one happened. I also started writing one that would be in my S5 pregnancy universe but 🤐

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

I don't. But this question confirms to me I have answered this before because I know I've joked about how TV has already done that for me, lmao. See: Bones/Sleepy Hollow.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? (I had to track down this question because it wasn't anywhere.) I don't think so!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope! I'm having déjà vu here. I know I have answered this before: I could do it myself! But I have a feeling it wouldn't be as easy as one might think, but I'd be honored.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I don't think so…? If I have, it was years ago, in my forum/LJ days. I've been trying to make it happen for a while now, but who knows if it'll ever happen. WE HAVE IDEAS. We want to make it happen. (Wink wink, nudge nudge. You know who.)

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

Spaceships are so cool. Atlantis was the first space shuttle I saw in person (and also the one I've seen the most) and it and its exhibit are awesome. I'm only missing Discovery out of the four space shuttles, because I didn't go to the second National Air and Space Museum location in Virginia back in 2015. And once the new exhibit center is completed, I'd love to see Endeavour again.

(In all seriousness, I don't have one. Booth and Brennan will forever and always hold a special place in my heart, but I love CJ and Danny so much, writing for them, their journey. Pls don't make me pick.)

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I am a big 'never say never' person, because I end up picking stuff up (and maybe rewriting it to fit my current style/ability) if I remember an idea… But I'm guessing many of them won't get finished. Probably some of those that are deep in my notes app or on the drive.

16. What are your writing strengths? I (try to) dig into the emotion of a scene as best as I can.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? Everything else? I know it sounds like an excuse (at least to my ears), but writing in your second language is hard. I know my writing sounds limited because of it – my descriptions will never be as evocative as I wish they were, my dialogue won't be there. I am not the most imaginative person, either.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

If it makes sense, and won't take the reader out of the story, go for it! (A few words, or a line or two, might work if there's appropriate context.)

But also, as a non-native speaker, I'll always recommend using pals who might be fluent in that language and checking with them! I know that, throughout my many years in fandom, I've read quick things in Spanish within English fics that weren't entirely correct in the context they were being used (i.e. character's fluency, smaller details), and they took me out for a second. (I know, I know – pot, meet kettle. If anyone has read an unedited story of mine, they've found me making up English phrases.)

19. First fandom you wrote for? Bones. In Spanish. (I also think I wrote some ficlets in English that are probably hidden in some random LJ comm I created for my writing. They're probably 14-15 years old.)

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

I honestly cannot pick! And maybe it's yet to come. But basically, if I've gone through the embarrassment of having someone edit/beta a fic and catch all the avoidable mistakes, it's because it genuinely has something I like about it and that I think others will like, too. (Perceived quality aside.)

Off the top of my head, and out of the posted fics (obvious recency bias, sorry). I have a story for all 23… Also, let's consider I've mostly not read them since they were posted so I might be off. (Would love to hear what everyone's favorite is, if you've read any and are reading this!) Obviously, that top 5 by kudos has great ones. There's a reason

don't want you to go but I'll be okay: I just remember finishing it and knowing it was something special. Felt like many things coming together. I wanted to write angstier, a break from the endgame of the IM AU I've yet to post, and I think it works. I had had that quote as inspo for a while, and I think the trip to Berlin put it back on my mind. (The first haunted by the notion draft is from around this time, too!)

your love is a secret I'm hoping, dreaming, dying to keep: the structure is likely a tad repetitive, maybe (but also, the point of 3+1s, sort of?) but I love writing in that s7 period, and there should be more fic with the press corps. I think the stuff I wrote while editing (which included an overhaul of the +1) is even better than what was there.

oh, and I will be with you to feel the California sun: recency bias, yes. I love a good early Cali story, and even if this was nowhere the story I sat down to write originally, I love how it turned out. It's silly but fun, and so sunny.

still you never took your hand from mine: I will always have all the soft spots for my memoir stories, even if two of them have yet to be posted. This one doubled its size a year and a half after “finishing” it because I realized what it was missing. It's sappy, probably unrealistic re: the publishing industry, but damn it if it's not one of those that have made me cry while editing them.

we could be the way forward and I know I'll pay for it: I had to include an oldie but goodie from my first year, and this one is so special to me. (Along with BBC 2008, which I also absolutely adore. That was the fic I always wanted to post. Hilarious it was third. But it's also my most popular fic by a huge margin.) Seeing it recommended on Tumblr? God. I love campaign stories and all their potential. I love that I took a random line from some unposted story and it evolved into this fic.

nobody knows how to get back home: I almost added the most recent one because of how fun it was to write (or, as I mentioned above, Big Block of Cheese) but I like how bittersweet this missing scene one is. I find CJ's internal struggle so interesting to explore, and this is one of her most vulnerable moments. I also wanted to see a hug so badly.

#20 questions for fic writers #ask games #god this is so late #hopefully I make up for it with my rambling #tagging whoever wants to do it - everyone I know was tagged in one of the rounds with me #in between writing most of this and posting it I hit 900 kudos woo

[damagedintellect]

💌BSD OC💌

💌 I figured since I’m a writer I’d be my own BSD SONA/OC/Self Insert based on my novel “Fake It Till You Make It” Her ability lets her copy the ability of the last person she has touched as long as she's seen said ability in action. (Has swatches of hair samples sewed into her gauntlet to swap abilities in battle) 💌 She was originally being sold to the Port Mafia but the ADA intercepted the transaction by "accident". Dazai found out about it when he was looking for who put the bid on Atsushi and came across her unfortunate case. Ultimately he didn't want to find out if she could copy Chuuya's annoying ability and decided to rig the transaction for the ADA's favor instead. Mostly as another fuck you to Mori 💌 When her ability first manifested at 5yrs old, her poor parents sold her for science, she's been passed from lab to lab under the threat that if she tried to rebel they would kill her family. The lab tried to form a singularity, trying to make her the first person to be able to use multiple abilities at once. It ended in failure and somehow she ended up on the black market. She can't remember her real name due to the amount of testing she's been under, she remembers her initials are D & I so she says her name is Damaged Intellect bc she feels like a broken person.

💌 Personality wise she's just tired. The lab was trying to create the ultimate ability vessel so she's been put through the ringer physically and mentally. Hella insomniac with the bags under her eyes to prove it. Only feels comfortable sleeping in small confined spaces or next to people she trusts. Likes to nap under people's desks while they're working. She doesn't want to wake up from the dream of living freely so she has a hard time sleeping on her own.

💌Mentally she has been trained to have a high intellect and analytical comprehension. She needed to be able to understand other people's abilities to use them efficiently being able to read people's intentions was an added bonus. (bc of this she found out her family was already dead so she became indifferent about life since there was nothing to return home to but she didn't want to die either)

She only goes with Dazai since she could tell there was no malicious intent behind his words and he promised life would be more beautiful.

She's carefree, grateful and mostly laid back until someone she cares about gets hurt then she goes absolutely feral. Will rip someone's jugular out with her teeth if she has too. Since she's indifferent about living, she often speaks in dark humor, sass and sarcasm bc of this, but will throw herself in front of a bus to save a dog. Copying Yosano's ability lets her be more reckless with her life than most people since she also doesn't want to die. Honestly she didn't think she would live this long and nothing could compare to the torture of the lab, she's kinda jaded to the pain. Like it still hurts she just doesn't give a shit.

💌She bleached her hair when she joined the ADA bc she couldn't stand seeing the lab rat she used to be but she didn't exactly have a favorite color since she didn't grow up like a normal person so it just stayed copper-ish. Ultimately not having a childhood/being raised in society makes the world one big game of act like you belong, she doesn't always get it right, interpreting her own emotions is hard.

As her roots grow out she has more and more mental breakdowns every time she sees herself in the mirror (only if she's alone)

[Part 2]

#bsd oc #oc lore #oc stuff #long post #this has been the only thing I've been able to think about for weeks #I guess I really missed making oc's with my friends for context none of them watch bsd so you guys will have to put up with me on this fron #my bsd brainrot is showing #(ﾉŎꇴŎ)ﾉ sry not sry it seemed like fun #damaged art

[aroapl]

Do you think what i wrote here(after this question) has anything to do with possibly being aplatonic or is it something more aromantic or possibly autism related or maybe something just compellty diffrent (I just am courious whats the deal with those things about me is)?

As a kid i always told my mom that i love her. most kids do.

As a teen i kinda started to ask what even is love and i never really managed to find an answer. And i really dont like saying things that are untrue so i stoped telling my mom i love her. Somehow we ended up talking about it and she got really upset that "i dont love her" but like i dont love her cuz i dont know what love is. So i really dont get why shes so upset. I still care about her, i think? I would miss her if she dissapered or died. Tho maybe i would only miss things that she provides me (care, support). So i guess i dont really know.

Its been some years. She still seems to be a bit upset about "my child doesnt know if they love me" thing whenever it pops up. I still dont know what love means be it platonic, familair or whatevevr else.

Most of my friendships are very shared interest based. That on top the fact that my interests can change relativly fast ends up with friends i lost contact with cuz just I lost interest in talking about that particular thing and with time i just forget about that person. Even if we talked everyday. I guess i always view relationships as something kinda transactional.

I'd recommend checking out the loveless and afamilial labels/communities. Loveless is a broad label that encompasses a lot of experiences related to rejecting love as a concept or having a complicated relationship with love, and it does include people who straight up feel that they don't experience love at all in any form. Afamilial is an aspec identity that describes feeling little to no familial attraction/love. Communities for both these labels exist primarily on tumblr from what I've seen, and the loveless community in particular is very intertwined with the aro community (though being aro is not a requirement to be loveless). The tags #loveless aro and #afamilial are a good place to start, and I have the tag #loveless on this blog for all things related to being loveless as well (also hello I'm loveless myself!).

What you describe in your last paragraph seems to be a pretty common experience among aplatonics. Whether you're aplspec or not is something only you can say for certain, but based on what little you've shared, it sounds like you certainly could be.

Since you mentioned autism, it is possible that all of this part of your autism, but it also would not invalidate you being loveless or aspec if that is the case. Plenty of loveless or aspec people find that their loveless/aspec identity goes hand in hand with their neurodivergence, or even believe that it is caused entirely by their neurodivergence. That doesn't make those experiences or identities any less real or valid for them. If you would be more comfortable attributing these experiences to your autism and leaving it at that, that's perfectly fine, but these other labels are still open to you if you want them.

Best wishes to you in your questioning anon! If you'd like a loveless or aroapl person to talk to about this personally, my messages are always open (though I may be slow to respond, I'm a bit of a mess at the moment lol).

#loveless #afamilial #aplatonic #apl #aplspec #asks

[yannysifgen]

This isn't an ask but I love how you assign different flowers for each character! My personal fav is Lucien with the "forever mine" red salvia, really great symbolism for his obsession with the MC!

My first "ask"! Thank you for sharing your thoughts anon!

I'm not sure how or why I decided to add in flower symbolism into the mix but I'm glad I did. I pick flowers based on a mix of their symbolism, language and just general vibes really. I didn't immediately share the meanings in case anyone liked digging around for info themselves, like I do lol, but I think this is a good time to share my thoughts because I just really like to share any cool info I find and use haha

You're spot on with Lucien's flower, the Red Salvia just seemed like the perfect fit for his character and his relationship with the MC! But I also wanted to note that the meanings for the other colors of Salvia do fit in with his character too!

Most of the excerpts I put in this post will be from the site The Petal Republic, I really enjoy reading the symbolism and meaning sections of the individual flower pages, check it out if you'd like! It's my main site for picking flowers for their meanings (but not always)

The red blooming Salvia flower is traditionally associated with love and romance and is symbolic of “Forever mine” gestures.

Purple is a very regal color, synonymous with royalty, success, and good standing.

The pink petals of a flower Salvia plant in the language of flowers are symbolic of love, femininity, gentleness

The blue flowers of a Salvia are often aligned with friendship and family and symbolic of thoughtful gestures such as sentiments of “missing you” or “thinking of you”.

All these aspects tie into his character one way or the other! You'll see more of it as the story unfolds. [Also a little sidenote, I used it to make the little logo for the game too which you can see in the top left of the character bio pages, mixed with another symbol. I may have stuffed a lot of obscure meaning into small things lmao its a trend with me]

Conversely, I picked both Laplace's and Stuart's flowers mainly for their "negative" meanings, but the positives can fit them too.

Candytuft for Laplace because it can mean indifference, which is Laplace's default state. Other symbolic meanings of the candytuft include sweetness and stoic beauty. Also they're often depicted with/compared to fairies, and depending on who you ask fae and daemon can have a lot of similarities.... also why they are tiny at 4'9" lmao. And the appearance also just fits somehow.

I picked Begonia for Stuart, on the basis of "other meanings" section which somehow perfectly translated his role in the story, it's kinda crazy how it all fits.

Warnings of misfortune: Traditionally, a begonia flower stood for an omen of something sinister in the near future. Most people don’t subscribe to this meaning today, but it is the reason why begonias are still so popular as gifts in hospitals. 

Caution: In some cultures, begonias are used to symbolize vigilance. You can give a begonia (of any color) to someone as a way of telling them to take care and stay healthy. 

Harmony: Another typical meaning of the begonia flower is harmonious communication. They symbolize diplomacy, kindness, and peaceful transactions between individuals or businesses. 

If you read till here, wow! Thank you for sticking to the end and reading my rambles, I appreciate it! Feel free to just share your thoughts and opinions too if not any asks! Always welcome

#yanduke #isekai'd into the arms of a yandere duke #yanny talks #yd ask #yd #yd Lucien #yd Laplace #yd Stuart #flower language #flower symbolism #lore stuffs