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xxmaxwellxx · 1 month

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Very sorry but can someone help me find another twst fic? It was more like headcannons but it’s where reader was at a masquerade/ball type event and rollo was there, my memory isn’t the best so forgive me, but I think rollo and reader dance and the boys watch with jealousy but I remember rollo taking reader out on some kind of balcony and either trying to kiss reader or convince them to leave the boys. I’m pretty sure it was the second one with him spouting off something about purity. I remember Azul for sure being in this one and I think malleus was in there too but I think they kiss reader in front of him or take them back inside at the end of their respective headcannons. Edit: here’s the link! https://www.tumblr.com/cyn-write/731537190125961216/i-feel-her-i-see-her

If anyone could help me I would be very grateful. Also if you recognize my username/me asking for help so many times and want an explanation I’ll leave it under the cut because it’s probably going to be me trauma dumping.

Hi, I’m Max. I have an anxiety disorder. The reason I’ve asked for help so many times and in so many fandoms is partly because of my anxiety. I recently got a new phone and I’ve had a hard time adjusting because all the screenshots I have of the fanfic I’ve read is on my old phone. If you’re wondering why I haven’t just airdropped the screenshots to my new phone it’s because I had so many screenshots that it took up all 64gb on my phone, not all of them were screenshots but about half of my storage was taken up by them. And when I think of a fanfic that’s not in my new camera roll I panic, and when I can’t find it by googling it or looking for it here on tumblr I panic even more. Just a few days ago I spent eight hours looking through my old phone for a fanfic that wasn’t even on there, I found it eventually but I was in tears begging whatever god that would listen to help me find it by the end. If you’re wondering why I get so worked up over fanfic of all things it’s because a few years back when I first found fanfiction I was depressed and suicidal do to living conditions I won’t go into, I used it as an escape so I wouldn’t have to face reality and ever since then fanfiction became such a huge part of my identity that I couldn’t imagine myself not reading it and I genuinely panic over not being able to find the ones I’m looking for. I’m on medication and looking for a therapist, I’m getting better I think, but it’s been hard. Im not trying to guilt trip and I’m not writing this for pity or sympathy or anything like that, I just think that where I post in so many tags, sometimes multiple times, I owe people an explanation. I might just be over thinking it but I imagine someone scrolling through their favorite tags and seeing me there and helping me out and then seeing me over and over again and getting annoyed so I feel like I owe people answers on why I’m asking for help so much. I feel guilty asking for help so much but I genuinely loose sleep over this. I’m very grateful for the people helping, trying to help and have helped me. It’s why I try to thank them even if they didn’t find the one I was looking for, just knowing people are willing to help puts me at ease and I usually post my requests for help before going to sleep because just talking about something with people who know what I’m talking about or is in the same fandom as me puts me at ease. If I’m annoying I’m sorry but just putting something out there where there are people who are willing to help and don’t judge me for it helps me sleep at night. Sorry for rambling and call me stupid or crazy or anything like that but I’m trying to get better, I really am and putting posts out there with the hope that someone can help calms my anxiety. Even if I don’t get a link or answers or get to reader the fic again just posting and talking about it helps me, like letting go of it and letting it drift away. Thank you for reading and I’m sorry.

#fanfic #fanfic finder #twst #twst x reader #twst wonderland #twst x y/n #twisted wonderland #twst azul #twst malleus #twst rollo #azul ashengrotto #malleus draconia #rollo flamme

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fairy-writes · 8 months

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FOREVER MINE NEVERMIND

Reblogs and Comments are greatly appreciated!!

__________________________________________________________________________

Fandom(s): Jujutsu Kaisen

Pairing(s): Geto Suguru x Reader

Word Count: 0.6k

Genre(s)/Tag(s): Angst, Gender Neutral!Reader

Notes: Based on one specific doctor who quote and another specific scene.

SPOILERS FOR THE ANIME

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You should have known what Suguru was going to do.

Maybe you could have stopped him.

Maybe you could have saved him.

But you didn’t.

And it was all your fault.

It started with a phone call.

Satoru had shown up at your door, distraught but uncharacteristically quiet. He refused to say where he had been, why he was even there, but you had let him in regardless. Because you always did. As annoying and obnoxious as Satoru was, he was your best friend.

Your phone rang, and you picked it up, clicking the little green button without looking at who was calling.

“Hello?” It’s quiet for a moment before you hear a deep breath.

And that’s all it takes to know who is calling you.

You glance to where Satoru is sitting, almost comatose, on your bed. Your room wasn’t very big, but he managed to make it look massive with how he was curled up underneath your covers.

He looked like a child.

Sometimes, you forget that’s all you were—teenagers who were forced to grow up too early.

“Suguru.” You say quietly, keeping an eye on Satoru as you speak into the receiver. You didn’t know what had him so upset, but you had a feeling it had to do with Suguru. It always has something to do with Suguru.

He says your name, and you have to hide the shiver that runs down your spine. If not for your sake, then for Satoru’s. You can’t have him knowing you’re talking to the person who upset him.

“Why are you calling me.” It wasn’t a question but a demand. It's a pretty sorry one, but Suguru answers nonetheless.

“To say goodbye, I suppose. You were always nagging me about how not saying goodbye was rude.” He muses, and you bite back a snippy retort.

It wouldn’t do you any good now.

“Why are you really calling?” You whisper and curse inwardly as you watch Satoru move from under the blankets at the sound of your voice cracking. His mop of white hair peeks out from under the covers, and he looks at you with what you swear are red-rimmed eyes from behind his crooked glasses.

“Is that Suguru?” He asks just as Suguru asks, “Is that Satoru?”

You don’t know what to say, so you just rasp a quiet “yes.” Satoru’s eyes darken, and he clenches his jaw before turning and throwing the blanket over his head again.

Suguru hums,

“He sounds upset.” He says, and once again, you have to reign in what would have been a hurtful comment.

“Of course he is.” You manage, and hear the sounds of little girls in the background. Suguru’s voice is muffled for a moment as he seemingly placates someone you don’t have the privilege of talking to.

Hadn’t he been on a mission where children were involved?

Before everything that happened?

“I’m really calling because I thought you deserved one last goodbye. From me. Not from anyone else.” He says simply, and that’s when the burning behind your eyes gets overwhelming, and you feel tears drip down your cheeks.

“I was going to be with you forever.” You croak, and for once, Suguru doesn’t have anything to say. No smooth comment or something to ease your fears. He’s silent before—

“I know.”

“The rest of my life. With you.” You try as if you could get him to take it all back. As if he could magically turn back time.

“I’m sorry.” He says, and Geto Suguru hangs up the phone with a quiet ‘click.’

#geto suguru #geto suguru x reader #suguru geto #getou suguru x reader #getou suguru x you #suguru geto x reader #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #fairy writes

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mybrainsrottingwithmcd · 5 months

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hi!! so i’m. really really new to the aphmau fandom, aka i was super into it when i was like 8 and now my autistic ass got back into and actually joined in fandom stuff

i don’t. entirely understand how to guide through the aphmau fandom on tumblr. and i have a few questions- if you wouldn’t find can you answer them for me since you seem to be super into this!

what is an MCD rewrite and where do i find them- i assumed it’s people rewriting minecraft diaries but what sparked this and why?

what’s with the hate for aaron and aarmau- i don’t. fully understand it

how did garroth/lawrence happen (i love the idea)

is there like. a masterlist of aphmau lore somewhere so i can make sure i didn’t miss anything in my rewatch (i definitely missed stuff in my rewatch)

Hello hello!! Welcome to the fandom (we’re so sorry ur here its a mess)

I’d be happy to answer ur questions :D

“what is an MCD rewrite and where do i find them- i assumed it's people rewriting minecraft diaries but what sparked this and why?”

Yeah you’re right a MCD rewrite is people rewriting MCD and adding their own ships or improvements or different plot points. It started because the original MCD is kinda written poorly. Some plot points go nowhere, some parts are problematic, some parts drag on, characters appear and disappear, characters stopped developing and most importantly MCD has no ending and was abruptly discontinued by Jess so she could focus on Mystreet and other projects. People just wanna improve and finish the thing that means so mich to them basically. You can find them on AO3 and a few on Wattpad (I recommend AO3 tho its easier to find rewrites ur interested in cuz the tag system)

“what's with the hate for aaron and aarmau- i don't. fully understand it”

(There arent enough words in this world to explain my hatred for aarmau and aaron BUT)

Many reasons heres the main few: when Aaron was introduced he was supposed to be a side character but then he became a love interest kinda outta nowhere (my theory as to why is because Jess’s husband Jason voices him) and when he did become a love interest other characters like Laurence and Garroth kinda stopped developing and became worse to justify why Aaron was a good choice for Aphmau. For me they never had any chemistry in MCD, when its revealed Aphmau is pregnant with Aaron’s kid my brain logged out because wtffff how did they find the time and also why Aaron ://. He wasn’t kinda boring, his angsty past could’ve been used more but wasn’t he was just a brooding masked figure who followed Aphmau around. Then Pheonix Drop High happened and made things really weird. So when Aaron was 18 going on 19 he started dating Aphmau who was 14. Very creepy much yuck, they didn’t communicate well and then his whole character became that he’s in love with Aphmau but “he’s just not good enough for her :((“ and “i shouldn’t be with her shes perfect” and personally i find romance dramas infuriating, especially that kind of drama. AND YES AS A 18YR OLD U SHOULDNT BE DATING A 14YR OLD WELL DONE AARON. Mystreet they were the annoying lovey dovey couple with relationship drama they just rubbed me the wrong way in that series, I stopped watching after Emerald Secret and only recently forced myself to finish Mystreet and yeah no idc about them or their relationship. In MCD season 3 when Shad was introduced as a full character his whole thing is he’s Aaron again but evil and Aphmau’s sad about it and uuuuugg i dont caaareee. And I personally thought Aphmau wasn’t gunna end with anyone in MCD because she went on multiple rants about how that isn’t what she’s looking for and she has to think about her people first and she prefers her own company and then BOOM gets pregnant of masky mcsad face. Ugh. Basically Aaron ruined everything.

(Aroacemau truther 4 life aarmau hater 4 life)

“how did garroth/lawrence happen (i love the idea)”

Garrence has been a ship since the characters were introduced and quite simply its because they have more chemistry together than with Aphmau. I’ve always been a lil uncomfortable with how Jess wrote Laurence and Aphmau’s interactions and Garroth and Aphmau’s interactions but Garroth and Laurence interactions were just more natural they had more banter they were sweet together. Then Jess did a bunch of queerbaiting with it and the ship got bigger, so many fanarts so many fanfics. Then it just never happened because Jess is a coward. Like it would’ve been so nice to see the hints and chemistry go somewhere but it didn’t. Everyone still holds hope tho. With rewrites Garrence is Canon :))

“is there like. a masterlist of aphmau lore somewhere so i can make sure i didn't miss anything in my rewatch (i definitely missed stuff in my rewatch)”

i have no idea on that one, i’ve rewatched MCD every other week for the past 8 years (autism go brrrrr) i’ve never had to look for a masterlist of lore BUT I’m sure someone has to have compiled one somewhere either on the fandom wiki or on Tumblr somewhere. :))

ANYWAYS YEAH WELCOME TO HELL HAVE FUN HERE

#WELCOME TO HELL #WAS I HELPFUL??? PROBS NOT LETS BE HONEST #im just a little guy #but yeah #from a veteran aphmau fan heres the tea #i hate aaron seriously so much #aroacemau #aphmau #mcd #minecraft diaries #minecraft roleplay #aphmau mcd #aphmau minecraft diaries #anyways

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renx01 · 29 days

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Betrayed - part 2

Part 1

Prompt: Your father is the head of a criminal enterprise, one which has come onto the kingsman’s radar. Galahad has the task to get closer to said head, so he starts dating you. After a lot of apprehension on your side, you finally let your walls be broken down by him. That is until you find out that he’s been using you all along. Pairing: Harry Hart x (GN!)Reader Fandom: Kingsman Tags/Warnings: angst, manipulation, established relationship Word count: 2611

You sit there in silence, tears streaming down your face. ‘Harry.’ The whisper would be inaudible to anyone but him. ‘Do it. It’s what I deserve.’ His left hand moves to hold the gun in place as you try to pull it away. ‘No, Harry.’ Your voice comes out strained. ‘I love you.’ There’s a brief pause. ‘I betrayed you, can’t you see that?’

‘If you really had, you would’ve killed me already.’

His grip on the gun loosens as he puts his forehead to yours and looks you in the eye. ‘Dear, you know I can’t do that.’ He sighs. ‘Now please, shoot me or I’ll do it myself.’ Pain is all you see in his eyes. ‘Harry, I-’

As you’re about to say something to him, your door bursts open, a young guy pointing a gun at you. ‘Drop the gun or I’ll blow your head off!’ He shouts at you as he walks around the table, so you quickly let it fall to the ground. ‘Harry, you alright bruv?’ Harry looks terribly confused as he stands up.

‘What are you doing here Eggsy?’

‘Saving your arse, isn’t that obvious?’ He looks the man over for any wounds. ‘Glad to see you’re okay. Now what’re we doing about this person?’ You still sit there, kneeling on the ground as you look at Harry who is pinching the bridge of his nose. He was obviously annoyed that things didn’t go as he’d planned. Swiftly, he grabs his glasses and puts them back on, it is as if a switch was flipped inside him. ‘Eggsy, please stop pointing your gun at my fiancé.’ The boy’s mouth almost drops onto the floor. Ignoring the obvious shock, Harry continues speaking. ‘Merlin, I need you to arrange for these bodies to be taken away and this mess to be cleaned up.’ He turns to you, his emotions unreadable once again. ‘Love, please stand up. I suppose I have some explaining to do.’

Harry had led you to his office before sitting you down. Getting out some tissues, he slowly started cleaning the blood off your hands and arms. It was silent, with Harry only giving a few instructions when he needed you to do something. The silence itself was calm, yet the tension had not dissipated. You were stiff as a board while he couldn’t bear to look you in the face. When he had almost fully cleaned the blood from your hands and arms, he finally spoke. ‘I’m sorry it had to come to this darling.’ His hands squeeze yours. ‘I’d hoped I would have more time to explain everything to you. To live a relatively normal life with you for a bit longer.’ You pull one of your hands out of his grip and stroke his hair trying to comfort him. Looking at the situation, it is awful all around.

‘Harry.’

He finally looks at you and you slowly put your hand on his cheek. ‘Please, don’t leave me.’ You whisper. ‘My love, I would but-’ ‘Harry, I need you. Now more than ever.’ A tear slowly starts falling down your face, but he reaches up and wipes it away. ‘I’m not sure if I can, but I’ll do everything in my power to stay with and protect you. Even if I have to move heaven and earth.’ Slowly, he stands up. ‘I’ll be back momentarily.’ The emotion which had laced his voice moments before disappeared suddenly. ‘Promise me, Harry.’

‘I promise.’

Minutes, which feel like hours, pass before anyone joins you again. The room is silent and the papers which hang on its walls feel almost suffocating. Silently, you stand up and leave the chair which is stood behind Harry’s desk. You need answers. Despite having noticed odd behaviours before this evening, you hadn’t expected this. Him not explaining everything to you before leaving the room didn’t help with the doubt you felt. You start looking in his dressers and around his desk. Everything seems normal; that is until you accidentally hit a button on the corner of his desk. It moves like a handle, and you find it opens a section of his wall to reveal an entire arsenal of guns and other weapons. A small gasp escapes you. Gathering yourself once more, you approach it and examine the various weapons. The guns were pretty familiar to you, as they were similar to what you grew up around, just more advanced. The same goes for the knives, which look to be pretty standard. What confuses you, however, are the several umbrellas and glasses which are on display. You grab an umbrella, which looks to be the same as the ones Harry often carries on him. Twisting and turning it, it doesn’t look to be any different from a normal one, that is until you open it, revealing a shield-like structure which allows you to look through. Quickly, you close and put it back. You decide it’d be wiser to look at the things which do not appear to be a weapon, like the glasses. Again, they look to be pretty normal, and you supposed they couldn’t be too dangerous as Harry wore them on an almost daily basis. You put them on, expecting to see how awful his vision was. What you didn’t expect was for it to show you a live feed of wherever Harry was and whoever he looked to be talking to.

‘Harry, you can’t be serious bruv.’ The young man you’re seeing through the glasses says before a scottish voice from an unknown source joins in. ‘Galahad, I knew of this mission, what it entailed, and how long it’d been going on, but you cannae tell me that you’ve fallen in love with a target.’ There’s a silence and you hold your breath, waiting for his response. ‘But I did and here we are. I cannot leave them, they’re the only person that’s ever made me some sort of way. It’s either you allow me to stay with and marry them or I’ll leave kingsman and marry them anyway.’ His voice cracks. You see how his hands move to cover his eyes, followed by hearing soft muffled sounds. ‘Harry, it’ll be alright. Just take your time and explain everything to them.’ He doesn’t reply but the muffled sounds continue. This is a side you’d never seen of him and hoped to never see again. At least not in this way, where you couldn’t go and comfort him. Slowly, you pull off the glasses and put them back into their designated spot. ‘I don’t know what to do; how to feel.’ You whisper to yourself as you sit back down.

For about half an hour, you continue to sit there in silence before someone opens the door. It’s a bald gentleman wearing glasses. ‘Hello there. Harry’s asked me to come get you.’ His voice seems hesitant, but you recognise the tone and Scottish accent from when you were wearing Harry’s glasses. You stand up and silently follow him out of the office and into the dining room. ‘I’m Merlin, a colleague of Harry’s.’ He looks at you and smiles. ‘He’ll explain everything to you momentarily. He just had to get some clearance to be able to do so.’ Merlin stops in front of the door which leads into the living room. ‘He does love you, dearly. Otherwise he wouldn’t be doing all this.’ Immediately after telling you, he opens the door, motioning for you to walk in. When you do, he closes the door behind you, leaving you and Harry alone. ‘Sit down dear. We have much to discuss.’

The rest of that evening was spent with Harry, which was in fact his real name, talking and you listening to him. He explained that while he did initially approach you because of your ties to your father, but as he got to know you he slowly started falling. You had won him over with your personality and intellect, and slowly, he started to feel guilty. But, he had hope and wanted to spend his life with you, which had resulted in him asking for your hand in marriage, despite the rules the kingsman had concerning relationships. The subject of your father and his business was one he had wanted to discuss, but life had caught up and your father ended up catching him before he could talk to you about it. It was difficult and you weren’t certain how your relationship would progress, but you knew that the both of you would try to make it work. The following weeks and months were spent with Harry showing you around Kinsman and introducing you to his colleagues. Merlin and Eggsy, who you’d met before, were his closest colleagues and friends. They were very close and he seemed particularly fond of Eggsy. He acted almost protective over him, as if he were his own son. He also looked to be quite fond of the younger agent Lancelot, who had actually beaten Eggsy in the recruitment process. Eggsy was able to join Kingsman eventually, with Harry being the main reason for it, though he wouldn’t explain how. He had been quite convinced of the young man’s skills and pulled some strings behind the scenes to make it possible. One of the nights, the two of you stayed at Kingsman HQ a bit longer and had dinner with Merlin and Eggsy. ‘So… you and Harry are staying together?’ The younger man enquires awkwardly and Harry, who had been having a casual conversation with Merlin, turns to him. ‘Yes Eggsy, we’ve been working things out amongst ourselves and we’re quite happy together.’ His gaze turns to you and he smiles. ‘Though we did have some serious conversations about the implications of our relationship and how it originally began.’ You nod. ‘We are taking our time, but I’m quite positive we’ll get out of this even stronger.’ Harry squeezes your hand in response and leans towards your ear. ‘I would like to get married at some point relatively soon; at least if you’re comfortable with that.’ He whispers. It had been over half a year since the incident with your parents had happened and you’ve slowly been building up each other’s trust. The initial months had been very difficult, but you understood that the person you love had done it to protect himself and his relationship with you. ‘I’d like that, agent Galahad.’ As he leans in to kiss you, you’re interrupted by Merlin making a coughing noise. ‘Now you lovebirds, we’re still at the dinner table and you aren’t alone.’

That night, the two of you lay in bed together. ‘My love.’ Harry says as he rolls over and looks at you. ‘I was thinking. Why don’t we get married in a small, closed ceremony? Nothing too fancy, just us and our closest friends.’ He pushes your hair out of your face. ‘Then run off to a far-away destination for a couple of weeks.’ You lean your forehead against his. ‘That actually sounds wonderful.’ The two of you kiss momentarily. ‘When?’ The smile on your face is positively mischievous. ‘How about next month? With how things are going, I should be able to get a few weeks off.’ ‘Sounds wonderful, mister Hart.’ He whispers in your ear before kissing you passionately. ‘I’ll talk to Merlin about it dear.’ So, he did. The following day he talked to Merlin and arranged for him to have some time off. Apparently, this was the first time in just over 10 years that he’s taken time off from Kingsman, so they were quite happy to oblige, especially since they have Eggsy to fill in for him during that time. You were quite surprised by that, while you knew he really loves his job, you didn’t know he was this committed. He had told you that he was in his early twenties when he had joined the organisation and the last time he’d taken some time off was when he’d caught the flu, about 5 years into having the job. With you in your early thirties, you couldn’t imagine not having had a proper holiday for so long. Despite this, he decided that he should be able to take time off for about a month and started organising your honeymoon, the destination of which remained a surprise to you on Harry’s insistence.

The day of your wedding had approached quickly. Despite only doing a civil ceremony, it was quite the celebration. Most of Harry’s colleagues and your friends had joined you for it, heading to the Kingsman estate for a small party afterwards. Now, you’re sitting at a table with your husband next to you holding your hand. Next to him sit Merlin and Eggsy, while your best friend and grandmother sit besides you. The rest of the room is filled with other friends, acquaintances, and a few family members who are sitting around several tables and talking amongst themselves. Your attention is diverted from Harry by someone tapping their glass with a spoon, something people usually do when they want to do a speech. It’s Eggsy, who looks quite nervous. ‘Excuse me.’ He hesitates momentarily before continuing. ‘I’d like to make a speech.’ He smiles at Harry. ‘I want to start off by saying that I am very happy for Harry. Over the past few years he’s helped me become a much better version of myself and I would like to thank him for that. However, that isn’t why we are gathered here today. My mentor has decided to marry his partner, which I am delighted about. Ever since they’ve been together, Harry has seemed more energetic and happier than ever before.’ He turns to you. ‘I want to thank you for being there for Harry, even in the darkest of times for the both of you, and for making him a better man.’ Eggsy sits back down quietly. The rest of the evening was spent listening to a few more speeches, followed by a relatively calm party where you and Harry talked, danced, and drank, like a lot. Towards the end of it, as the guests continued to drink and party, the two of you snuck off to your room. The night was still young and together you spent most of it enjoying it as a newly wed couple.

The following afternoon Harry took you to a small airport and Merlin was there, ready to fly you to wherever you were going. He greeted you with a smirk as Harry took your luggage up the stairs. Again, you had no clue where you were heading, but you trusted your husband. You decided to read a book while on the flight. It was quiet, but the silence was comfortable, you and your other half sitting next to each other. His hand rests on your knee while he himself reads the paper. The remainder of the, seemingly short, flight was spent in this manner. ‘Dearest,’ he pauses, ‘please close your eyes.’ You do and he leads you outside, the warm air hitting your face. ‘Now, where do you suppose we are?’ The air felt familiar, as if you’d been there many times. ‘Italy?’ You ask and he tells you to open your eyes. You recognise the airport quickly and you turn to him. ‘Tuscany, that’s lovely dear.’ ‘I’m glad you’re excited.’ He leans down to kiss you. ‘I arranged with your grandparents that we can stay in their estate for a week before we start travelling around.’ His hand, which is placed on your lower back, slowly pushes you towards the car which stands at the ready.

Taglist: @hereforthefandoms12

#ao3 writer #fanfic #harry hart #fanfiction #harry hart imagine #harry hart reader insert #harry hart x reader #kingsman #kingsman imagine #kingsman reader insert #the kingsman #eggsy unwin #merlin kingsman #Galahad kingsman

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lowcallyfruity · 6 months

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Hihi! Welcome to my blog!

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

localanimeidiot -> lowcallyfruity

⟡ You can call me Lux or Honeydew !

⟡I am a MINOR!! Soo like- pls don’t be creepy 😋 please and thank you 👍

╰┈➤ Please do not follow me if you ONLY post N.S.FW. You will get blocked.

╰┈➤ I SOMETIMES make inappropriate jokes and reblog suggestive stuff. Sorry about that.

PLEASE. Let me know if you need something tagged.

↳ I’m also terribly sorry if my tagging is messy and inconsistent sometimes.

Pronouns page💥💥

⋆Mexican… English + Spanish

⟡ My blog is a MESS. I post lots of different stuff, but since my current hyper fixation is twisted wonderland, my blog is MOSTLY twisted wonderland centered.

⤷ But you’ll see stuff from other fandoms as well sometimes :) (most often reblogs)

╰┈➤ Speaking of TWST, I hc all of the characters (students) as queer, and maybe like…most of them as neurodivergent, and I talk about it ALOT ALOT. So if you don’t like/are uncomfortable with constant talk about neurodivergence/gay stuff then maybe don’t follow me, but yeah just a heads up 👍

⋮ ok I talk about queer stuff a lot in general so- yknow-

⟡ 😔 I’m cringe, annoying, I talk a lot and I’m very enthusiastic about lots of things!!!!!!

⟢heads up, I say lots of exaggerated/intense things and expressions, and ig speak in weird ways?

↳ I say slurs. (Faggot, Beaner, Dyke)

⟢ I can be REALLY bad at understanding and interpreting tone sometimes, so I apologize if I do not understand something!

⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅

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Modern Leovil(???) AU (AU where Leona and Vil are divorced. Epel is their son. Hijinks ensue)

My twst ocs🪞💛 (TWST oc things)

Mc 💛: Lapis Ávalos (My Main TWST MC<3)

જ⁀➴ ship tags 𓂃

~I’m a multi-shipper! These are just my main ships/ones I post about a lot!~

sebeppy…..i love them… (My Sebek x Epel posts!)

idiasil…my beloved… (My Idia x Silver posts!)

ridtreykei (My Riddle x Trey x Cater posts! ￫ this tag is specifically for all 3 of them, so it won’t contain posts that just talk about Trey x Riddle or Trey x Cater! [And on the rare occasion Riddle x Cater] and don’t mention ridtreykei!)

azujami…my sillies… (My azul x Jamil posts)

Leovil…the slays… (My Leona x Vil posts)

Kalirug…the pookies (My Kalim x Ruggie posts)

jaderuggie…so silly (My Jade x Ruggie posts. They are queerplatonic to me)

💛! Jadeotter (Jade + Kalim! They are platonic/queerplatonic to me💛 also includes stuff by other people!! )

💛! Bleeding Hearts (Rollo x August [Vice President NPC])

Flonei…so cool… (Floyd x Neige)

Akeshu…crazy… (Akechi x Joker/Akira)

⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅

₊˚⊹⋆ Thanks for reading :3 💛!

#I cant do masterlists/intro posts 😢#I hope this is decent lmfao #tags will be added in the future if I make new ones 👍

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chuuya-fan-page · 5 months

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Regarding E’s post about Taylor Swift...

No offense, but who are you to say that? Like, let people have their fun. Who are they hurting by adding Taylor Swift to their soukoku playlists and posting about her songs/lyrics in relation to them? If it annoys you—don’t interact with it. Scroll past, press not interested/dismiss depending on the platform you’re on, filter tags/key words, block people (Blocking was made to allow people to curate their timelines and not see content they don’t want, it doesn’t mean the blocker has some sort of agenda against the person they blocked, like many people love to pretend). All these alternatives are a million times better than being mean about it. As a placeholder for blocking, you can also filter out someone’s username on Tumblr and it’ll hide all their posts from your dash the same way filtering a tag would. There are so many ways to avoid this without posting about it and spreading negativity.

If you disagree with someone in regard to a song fitting a ship (or anything fandom related, really), that’s completely okay. That’s your opinion, and you are entitled to it. What you’re not entitled to is shaming the person for it and telling them what they are and aren’t allowed to do.

Some Taylor songs genuinely fit them very well, in my opinion. Yes, also in my opinion, not all the songs people claim do actually fit them. But in their opinion the songs do, and who am I to tell them they’re wrong? My opinion isn’t in any way superior to theirs. And I’m not about to tell people what to think, or how they can interpret relationships, or what songs they’re allowed/not allowed to have in their relationship playlists. It’s not my place to. It’s not anybody’s place to.

It’s the same way the problem with the Chuuya hate page isn’t that they hate Chuuya, but instead that they’re unnecessarily loud and mean about it. Of course, I’m not trying to say that you’re “the same” or anything, because what the Chuuya hate page is doing is a thousand times worse than this, but this is the beginning of what evolves to be posts like theirs.

Not to mention that this whole mindset of “Stop making everything about X”/“Stop throwing X at everything” is rooted in ableism. What if an autistic person has Taylor as their special interest and they can’t help make everything about her? Heck, what if they have soukoku and Taylor Swift as special interests simultaneously and combining the two brings them unrestrained joy? Why should that bother you?

As an autistic person, I’m really tired of people telling me to stop making everything about my special interests. It’s genuinely out of my control, and I don’t understand why my happiness annoys them so much.

Please don’t take this as hate. The whole reason I sent this is because I like this blog, and I like to believe you’re mature enough to understand what I’m saying and where I’m coming from. Thank you for taking the time to read this <3

Hey I'm sorry that my post was read as being mean, I didn't mean for it to come across as anti-Taylor Swift. I do have my own issues with her but her music is good and I don't have a problem with people thinking a few of her songs fit whoever.

And also I'm not talking about actually explaining why you think a song fits them, that's cool as fuck. Analysis is great I love character analysis, especially if you talk about songs that represent the character and why.

Now respectfully, I think you are reading into a post too much but you did send me a well formatted ask so i'll by paragraph.

Who am I to say that? It's a take, I can have those and I wasn't shaming anyone. I said Taylor Swift makes good music but it doesn't fit everything. Which is true.

Please do not compare me to the Chuuya Hate Page as what she does is entirely different and my saying not everything works with Taylor Swift is so far away from being a bigoted shithead.

I'm not going to say much on the ablism but do know that I am also autistic. I understand where you are coming from but you also have to understand that sometimes special interests can clash. I said what I did because most of the "this Taylor Swift song fits them so well!!" is full of mischaracterization and it pisses me off because bsd is my special interest.

So, I'm not telling anyone specifically to stop doing what makes them happy, I made a very short post where I didn't even say anyone was doing anything bad. I said Taylor Swift doesn't need to be for everything.

Having said all that I do appreciate that you took the time to explain why exactly that post upset you and that's valid, however I am allowed to post whatever takes I want and you don't have to agree with me.

-E

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maybirdie · 9 months

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Horizon Asks

Thanks for the tags @singingkestrel and @meg-noel-art !

1. ride or die ship (your otp): Ereloy. As if that’s news to anyone lmao

2. most annoying ship: I see y’all trying to start drama, I’m not falling for it lmao. Oh wait actually...Talanah/Amadis 🤣

3. second favourite ship: Between Kotallo/Talanah and Abadund/Morlund. One for spicy, one for sweet. Also Petra and like, most of the women in the game

4. favourite platonic relationship: I love the big brother/little sis vibes between Beta and Erend even though we never see them interact really. I love that she mentions that he makes her laugh. Also Aloy and Gildun - obsessed.

5. underrated ship: Drakka/Yarra - LISTEN I KNOW but it’s the ultimate enemies to lovers and I love them. Also Avad/Ersa....starcrossed lovers ftw

6. overrated ship: more instigating I see

7. one thing i would change in canon: One? LMAO. So many things post-HZD. Particularly the way Erend got shafted and how many threads got dropped (we didn’t get a post-Daunt makeup scene? Really??). Also Talanah should have been an official GAIA gang member, hands down. And I’ll be honest, the way romance for Aloy was handled in general.

8. something canon did right: The entire arc of HZD is masterful and perfect and it’s been a long time since I’ve been that gripped by a mystery in any media. It was always going to be hard to top, but I would love if the next game reverted back to that kind of storytelling vs the “doing too much” trend of HFW

9. a thing i'm proud of creating for the fandom: A hard choice, but I think I have to pick Love Games just because it was such a labor of love between myself and @sorbetowl. I had a blast collaborating with such a talented artist and friend! For that reason I’m SUPER excited to be working on the upcoming VN, Focus on the Heart - already such an amazing experience!

10. a character who is perfect to me (wouldn't change a thing): GILDUN GILDUN GILDUN GILDUN GILDUN

11. the character i relate to the most and why: Definitely Erend. There’s a reason I ship him with Aloy lol. I guess there are pieces of both of them I relate to hard - Aloy’s impatience with rude people/social situations and her love for solitude, Erend’s self-consciousness and sense of responsibility for keeping everyone happy and feeling good. The combo of them hits real close to home.

12. character(-s) i hate the most and why: Tilda was a really tough character for me for personal reasons. She’s a wonderfully crafted villain but she also makes my skin craaaaawl. Which I suppose is exactly what she’s meant to do, so well done Guerrilla 😂

13. something i've learned from the fandom: God so much. I rolled into the Ereloy discord totally clueless back in April 2022, and feel like I have so much useless lore in my head now (and I’m not anywhere near some of the real lore people I know). But beyond lore, I’ve really learned how important empathy and putting yourself in other’s shoes can be. It’s amazing how many new friends I’ve made from being open to other people’s POVs, and how much I’ve seen people hurt each other because they’re not open to it.

14. three tags i seek out on ao3: Sensual Fingerblasting (iykyk), There Was Only One Bed, Sparring as Foreplay

15. a song i strongly associate with my otp/favourite character: Slowly by Olivia Dean, Can’t Fight This Feeling by REO Speedwagon cause what better Friends to Lovers song is there?

tagging: No pressure tags!! Also sorry if this is a repeat for anyone. @souls-that-have-senses, @sorbetowl, @imamandajulius, @emtazer, @brekkie-e, @cranialgames, @nerd-artist, @xxxhellfireravenxxx

#horizon forbidden west #hfw #horizon zero dawn #tag game

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silkythewriter · 1 year

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This is a special request from anonymous! <3

Summary: Devils S/O who can sing beautifully and has a feet disability

Small warning!: Sense this is such a specific request I might get some thing incorrect so please let me know if anything offends you or may cause you some uncomfortableness! I really do hope this is as accurate as you want it to be and I hope this helps you in whatever way it can! ^^ also sorry for any grammar/spelling mistakes!

Small note!: So for anyone confused I take specific request in the DMs if you don’t want to say it by inbox, this is just to make people comfortable and this is open to anyone!. <3 and to anon I hope this is long enough! I didn’t wanna copy much off of my other HC cause I didn’t wanna seem rude but I hope I added enough!

Fandom!: Cuphead and mugman/the cup brothers!

Daily song suggestion!:

❤️‍🔥 The Devil ❤️‍🔥

This man is a little show off so whenever you have to use your walking stick he usually swaps it for a more luxurious one, of course it’s still built to your comfort just with a bit of glam to it!

The Henchmen are at your service whenever and wherever literally sometimes it gets concerning how fast they come to help you with something-

Sense walking can be a discomfort to you especially if your walking a long distance he usually has a demon set up your wheelchair for you! He also makes a few follow you just incase

Breakfast in bed every day if you want honestly! Name what you want and you have it!

He doesn’t really trust people with you other then maybe his henchmen and kingdice but even then whenever you need help with something he’ll be there half of the time!

The cup brothers definitely tease him about it whenever they can but they are careful due to him being the devil and all 💀

He stuck to your side almost everyday no matter where you are, he just like knowing your okay and safe!

He absolutely loves when you sing to him, he’s a bit embarrassed about it though, sometimes he does ask you to sing him to sleep it might seem silly but it actually does help him a lot!

He loves cuddling up to you in your guys bed, I feel like his main affection is physically affection! So expect a lot of cuddle sessions

Hates to ambit it but you have made him a bit of a better person, and honestly his henchmen absolutely adore you for that!, they love how you remind him to say please and thank you and actually appreciate their work :*)

You hang out with the cup brothers much to the devils dismay, the more time you spend with the cup brothers the whiner and annoyed the devil gets, bro literally drags you away sometimes-

Like said in my other HC he absolutely loves when you pet/brush through his fur it calms him down so much, and the henchmen have gotten saved by you multiple times by this, if you hug him or brush his fur or even just enter the room he’s almost in tranced so much so that he forgets why he was even angry and just goes to hang out with you

Like I’ve said before he loves showing you off has his partner! And if anyone doesn’t like it internal damn nation seems like an appropriate punishment to the devil:’)

If you have a sweet tooth I’m amusing you like ice cream and most of the time if the devils busy cuphead and mugman tag along

But sometimes when that icecrem man mugman ABSOLUTELY DESPISES comes over he becomes supper anxious and nervous around the man

Sometimes he can hold in his anger and just goes a bit ballistic- so you and cuphead are usually the ones who have to pry him off the poor man-

He does though eventually apologizes for his out burst

Sometimes even though he finds the Cups annoying the Devil likes to tag along just to see this outburst he finds it absolutely hilarious 💀

On another note (sorry for the weird jumps) The devil has his own special box that no one is aloud to touch other then him and you, it mostly contains Valuable items like photos of you and him and small gifts you hav bought him!

Overall this man loves spoiling you rotten, he just can get enough of you! Your love is contagious and it just softens up his cold heart sometimes.. he absolutely adores you inside and out no matter what <3 I just hope you can handle his sassy personality 💀

hey guys so sorry I haven’t been posting much!<3 I’ve been having some personal issues to handle so just know I’ll still be writing just less, I’m so sorry again! Also thank you to my special anon for being so patient!

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tllgrrl · 5 months

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20 Questions for Fic Writers

Thanks for the tag @missamyshay !! Sorry for the delay. Some of these questions were hard to answer, so I ran away, then came back, and ran away, and I apologize for the ramblings.

If anyone has any questions/asks, feel free to…well…ask.

* * * * *

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

70 (Note: Many, of them well under 1K words and one shots. When something starts on Tumblr, it pretty much also goes over to AO3. Even drabbles.)

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

163,518

3. What Fandoms do you write for?

The Falcon and The Winter Soldier - Marvel Cinematic Universe

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1. One Quarter of a Year, 2. Language Lessons, 3. Welcome Home (the sequel to One Quarter of a Year), 4. A Front Yard Situation, 5. Bucky, Cass, and the King of Mardi Gras

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes. I don’t always immediately respond, but I eventually do. Why respond? Because I’m already surprised that anyone reads a thing I wrote. No one is required to leave a comment. They can read and go on to the next, and they do. But if someone reads something I wrote, and wants to tell me that something about it made them want to tell me about it what they liked or what touched them and/or ask a question, or in one case complain about it? It’s an amazing thing to me, so much so that a comment always sends me back to read WTF I could have possibly written that made someone feel this.

6. What is a fic you write with the angstiest ending?

I haven’t written one with an angsty ending. Yet.

7. What’s the fic you write with the happiest ending?

Hmmm…lemme think…

They’re all pretty happy, I think, but the most hopeful, heartfelt ending I think is at the end of Ndinawe when Sarah walks out of the therapist’s office building after her first ever session post-Snap/post-Return, and finds Bucky waiting for her with a little bunch of flowers.

I will leave it to readers to tell me what they think my happiest ending would be.

8. Do you get hate on fics.

There’s that one time someone liked, but complained about 6 words (2 short phrases) in a 300 word ficlet/triple drabble where Sarah and Bucky are in a very quiet and intimate moment, and he says something to her in isiXhosa, which we know he speaks. Then he says it in English, and then in Kreyol, which, in my headcanon, Sarah learned from her parents, who spoke Haitian Creole (Darlene’s family) and Louisiana Creole (Paul’s family). Because Louisiana.

This person was annoyed and couldn’t understand why anything other than English was being spoken even though the translation is in the story and a little Glossary is in the notes..

And when I tried to explain why I chose that and that in canon, Bucky and Sam both speak more than one language, the person commented back that didn’t want to read an explanation…which is why I wrote one anyway.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I write erotica. To my mind, smut is different. And I don’t like the word “smut’. Like how some people don’t like the word “moist”.

I write two middle-aged grownup adult people for whom Communication is important. Even if things are difficult or awkward, they still at least try.

Also, they’re perfectly able and willing to grab a Quickie, and I’ve written at least one Quickie, but in my stories so far, like to take their time when they have the opportunity. Someone once described it as making love “like adults: long, slow, luxurious”.

I think that’s the kind I write.

Maybe that didn’t describe the kind of “smut” I write. If anyone can describe it to me, please do!

10. Do you write crossovers?

Not yet. But I do have something in mind.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of and I hope not.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not that I know of, but I would actually like to try to do that myself with help from Google Translate, Language Tutorials on YouTube, and the assistance of native speakers.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic?

Yes!! Bucky, Cass, and the King of Mardi Gras co-written with The @btwxsixesandsevens. The Paul & Darlene Ship Logs is a A Talk Like a Pirate Day day-long speed write, where @btwxsixesandsevens, wrote Bucky’s Journal entries and I wrote Captain Sarah Wilson’s personal ship logs. And also Snitches which was born from a funny “what would happen if” conversation with @shellyac75. I asked if I could embellish it, stretched it out and make a fic, and was given permission to play.

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

Bucky Barnes & Sarah Wilson (aka SarahBucky or BuckySarah) from the minute Bucky made it a point to let Sarah know that he was there, and he saw her. And she saw him, right back.

That having been said, if I’d known, when I was a kid, that I could make up my own stories about characters I liked, there is one ship that I would have filled my PeeChee notebooks with: Lt. Nyota Uhura & Spock. Yes, long before JJ Abrams made them a thing, I, in my tweeny brain, felt like something was possible there with those two. Nurse Chapel be damned.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

I don’t have one of those. I have a couple of Finished For Now stories that I have plans to revisit and continue, though. They’re not WIPs though. Plus, I’d never not finish a story.

16. What are your writing strengths.

Beats me. Someone who knows about writing techniques will have to tell me. I have been told that when reading my stories, a reader can see where they are and what’s happening.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I overthink and I think I get in the weeds when I write. I’m hyper critical, so I find fault with everything I write. Someone else will have to tell me what my weaknesses are in my writing. I know what they are in my process.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic.

(See #12j I’m not afraid of it.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

The only fandom I’ve written for: The Falcon and the Winter Soldier.

That having been said, I may have inadvertently written a drabble/ficlet/thing as an answer to a question that was posed in a Firefly forum on Ravelry (a multi-use community website for knitters and crocheters) probably 20 years ago. People enjoyed it and one commenter said I should write fan fiction, which, at the time, I thought was ridiculous. If I can find it, I may post it on AO3 for shiggles, though the show is long gone. (I know that there are still Browncoats around.)

20. Favorite fic you’ve written.

This is a really hard question because I find fault with every thing I’ve written. Every single thing. And my answer can change sometimes a couple of times during the span of a day!

I’d rather people tell me their favourite, and why, (Soft suggestion: Please feel free!!) but if I had to pick one today right now:

One Quarter of a Year / Welcome Home

I consider these two a single story that has yet to be joined on AO3.

* * * * * * * * * * *

Whew.

I am soft tagging @khululekile , @philtstone , @btwxsixesandsevens , @spinachgarden, @sarifinasnightmare and anyone who wants to jump in and play. Come on in! (If you’ve already been tagged, apologies! )

#asks answered #asks

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idontgetanysleep · 9 months

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thanks for the tag @wolffegirlsunite ! <3

1. ride or die ship (your otp): padme x anakin (ik he is toxic as fuck brother!!), or codywan because cute

2. most annoying ship: ahsoka x rex or anakin x rex, i just don’t see them as anything other than like siblings so it freaks me out, also i just can’t see anakin with anyone other than padme because that boy is OBSESSED (sorry if you like these ships they just aren’t my thing)

3. second favourite ship: tech x phee, i’m not even a tech girly but i just absolutely adore their dynamic

4. favourite platonic relationship: AHSOKA AND REX, i love their sibling like relationship sm, a close second is cody and rex they are the besties of the GAR and i love it, also omega and wrecker bc they are adorable

5. underrated ship: obi x satine, bly x aayla

6. overrated ship: reylo

7. one thing i would change in canon: cody being in the kenobi series 😐 (like he was fucking suppose to be!)

8. something canon did right: the entirety of the clone wars, but specifically showing how mistreated clones are and not just brushing it off as “they love war! they were made for it!😃” like how it is in the prequels, i love how the clone wars shows the process of the clones realizing they are more than what they were programmed to do, the whole shifting from clone troopers to storm troopers in tbb is something i also think canon did right because it is so important in the history of the empire, and i love how they are showing a bit of how the clone troopers are helping each other after all these years of just helping their superiors (they are finally fighting for each other!)

9. a thing i'm proud of creating for the fandom PLEASE BRAG ABOUT YOURSELF I WANT TO SEE/READ YOUR ART: my wallpapers! specifically the cowboy mando set i just uploaded :) i’m really proud of how they came out

10. a character who is perfect to me (wouldn't change a thing): rex, cody, jesse, kix, fives, echo, wolffe, hunter, howzer, gregor, mayday, etc…(LITERALLY ANY CLONE, IM NOT KIDDING) but also ahsoka, din djarrin, and chuchi too

11. the character i relate to the most and why: ahsoka probably, just growing up a certain way and realizing it isn’t right and leaving it behind you\having almost no one from that past family listen (that was kinda deep, my b)

12. character(-s) i hate the most and why: palpatine, tarkin, that mf that didn’t help mayday, PONG KRELL! i feel like the reasons are obvious

13. something i've learned from the fandom: it’s okay to be entirely invested in star wars! i get a lot of shit for being a die hard star wars fan but then i come on here and feel safe about it :)

14. three tags i seek out on ao3: i don’t have ao3 💔 i read all my fics on here because i love you writers <3

15. a song i strongly associate with my op/favourite character:

favorite character: rex

song: epiphany - taylor swift

no pressure tags! @starrylothcat @arctrooper69 @techorgana @blueink-bluesoul @cloneloverrrrr @dukeoftheblackstar @sunkissedclones @freesia-writes

if you have already participated ignore the tag!

if you want to join in and aren’t tagged pls do! and tag me!

#tag post #h interacts #h likes to share music

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xeymol · 7 months

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Woah new pinned post jumpscare.

Hello I’m pie, you can call me whatever you want tbh. pie, xey, xeymol, weird void cup, whatever as long as it’s not mean i don’t care lmao

(Used to be known as SoggyMuppet)

Some important information about me:

- i am EXTREMELY nervous and shy so I apologize if I tend to be awkward with any interactions with anyone

- I may be shy but I don’t mind getting asks, I actually kinda love getting them wither it be answering actual questions or getting doodle requests

- I absolutely love and adore making gifts for people especially if I consider them a friend so gifts for others should be a fairly common sight

- I tend to go for long periods of time without posting, it’s not because I feel I need a break or because I have artblock (may possibly be the case at some point actually) but it happens because I just have a genuinely hard time getting my ideas on paper

- if you ever want to send an ask but your Nervous or I seem scary please know I’m quite harmless and I don’t mind getting asks, it may take me awhile to respond but do know It’s nothing against you and I either just haven’t checked my notifications yet or I’m just taking awhile to type my answer (possibly also drawing something to go with it)

- I am extremely apologetic so I apologize if that gets annoying, I’m just a strong overthinker and I get overwhelmed by it easily which leads to me apologizing a lot for very small thingys

- unreasonably anxious and overly sensitive, if your going to be rude to me please at least be straight up, I can’t tell if or when someone is being jokingly mean and that causes me to overthink and become stressed

- I am very forgetful, some things leave my head instantly so I need to be reminded of things multiple times

___________________________________________________________________________________________________

Random Info:

- my persona is some sort of Eldritch creature made of void with a cup for their head, their name is granola

- I absolutely ADORE birds, I can’t draw them for shit but I love seeing pictures of them

- I am not funny. my humor is absolutely horrible, I try to stay family friendly on here but an adult joke might slip sometimes, though I do cuss a lot so I guess I’m not very family friendly💀

- I genuinely do not make sense half the time and when I do it’s either weird or concerning, I’ll say shit like “holy shit Freddy fazbear in portal 2 real not clickbait?!?!?!?!“ or “will skin you alive then boogie on your corpse” and other strange shit, I have something wrong with me✨

- I have horrible grammar and spelling, autocorrect loves to fuck me over so I’m sorry if a sentence ever comes out wrong on accident

___________________________________________________________________________________________________

My main interests right now are:

- space

- horror/body horror

- making strange critters

- a few of my personal projects

- don’t starve/don’t starve together

___________________________________________________________________________________________________

I usually make fanart for whatever fandom I’m in at the moment but there’s a rare chance I may share if stuff and or original story’s I’m working on, most of what I post is doodles but there is a rare case of fully rendered art. I might post kinda gorey or body horror and genuinely just spooky art one day and if I do I’ll definitely put a warning and try my best to tag it properly, I enjoy making sorta cutesy silly shitposts most the time and I tend to get sorta extreme with my facial expressions lol. I’ve been drawing for technically all my life really, I’m not the best but I’m very devoted to art and designing characters and story’s, my art tends to have heavy shading and overall a sort of dark atmosphere and that’s just due to my immense love for horror and spooky vibes

___________________________________________________________________________________________________

Anyways that’s all I have for now, I’ll add to this if I ever have anything more I feel I should add

Goodbye for now, hope you have a lovely day/evening/night💕

___________________________________________________________________________________________________Commission status: currently open🔥

#pinned post

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welcometololaland · 1 year

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Fic Origin Story aka. Hyperfixations: the Original

A bunch of you tagged me back in this which is...fair because I should probably do my own if I'm going to expect people to tell me their life fic story. I'm SORRY I'm so obsessed with knowing about people it's a problem.

I'm living for all your responses please keep going I beg!

1. What was your first fandom (reading and/or writing)?

I don't think it's a secret that I once upon a time wrote for the fandom that shall not be named, but my first fandom was actually Veronica Mars. I read fic on some website that no longer exists but was devoted entirely to LoVe (Logan/Veronica).

I never wrote and never left comments like a complete dick, but I was also 14 and it's like common knowledge I was a complete asshole as a child.

2. What was the first story you ever wrote (even if it was never posted) and what made you decide to write it?

For fic, it was a ridiculously terrible self-insert Veronica Mars story (except I inserted myself as a best friend not a love interest...interesting choice). I remember my character surfed and made people eat Vegemite. Which...I can't surf and I'm not even going to address the Vegemite thing.

I think I was 14. It never saw the light of day thank GOD.

3. What's a piece of advice you would give to your younger fic-writing self?

Wait, and find something you're really passionate about. I'd get stuck on a bunch of chaptered fics that seemed like good ideas but I had no real fire for. Then Speak for Yourself happened and I was like damn, this is what writing is supposed to feel like.

Also, don't write in the second person. Who does that? (me, I did that)

4. What's an early fandom interaction that stuck with you (be it a nice comment, a friend you made, a fic that got a lot of feedback etc.)?

A. The day @everwitch-magiks left me a comment and changed my life by ushering me into a group of fandom friends and lighting the RWRB fire.

B. The day @rmd-writes dropped into my inbox with a gentle 'hey, do you want to let me in your doc for beta purposes?' and then took up residence and never left my G drive / heart.

5. Post a sentence or two from one of your older fics, and a sentence or two from a newer one (if you want).

I have regret for accepting this suggestion. The below fic is a Hunger Games fic I wrote originally in 2013? but i reposted it to Ao3 in 2020 (shame - why did I do that). Also, note use of second person - a bold fucking choice that did not pay off 😂:

Time is something that you seem to forever wish for, and never seem to get. It feels like your whole life has been spent trying to grasp time with a firm hand and will it to stand still. It seems like you race against a clock ticking more rapidly with every day that passes. As all humans, your days are finite. But as the particular person that you are, chosen to lead a sick, twisted life of triumph and tragedy, the days slip by you so fast it feels like it is over before it has really had the chance to begin.

This is from my newest fic (which is somehow approaching 40k and only 3.5/10 chapters) 😬😬😬

TK rolls his eyes. “You’re pretty unobservant for a private investigator,” he murmurs. “If one more person offers to buy you a drink, I’m going to buy you a wedding ring and force you to wear it.”

“You’re— What?”

“I’m jealous,” TK says drily, arching an eyebrow in Carlos’ direction. “Didn’t realise I needed to spell it out for you.”

Carlos frowns. “Of annoying hedge fund managers trying to buy me overpriced drinks and talk me into heli-skiing?”

“Hedge fund managers in Austin?” TK smirks. “Oh baby, you found a good one.”

Not tagging anyone because I already spammed a bunch of people but tagging @reyesstrand @carlos-in-glasses @rmd-writes because you tagged me back and @clottedcreamfudge because you taught me how to be ridiculous and now you must deal with the consequences of your actions.

#ask game #tag game #ALTA #snippet #lola snippet #lola writes

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anti-dazai-blog · 9 months

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how do you deal with hate? like from what I understand, you posted your first "controversial" post knowing that people might hate you for it, and you did so anyways. even tho it might have felt like you were the only one who believed those things at the time. where do you get the confidence? cause honestly that was such a slay.

Like, obvi we all have our own opinions and I don't agree with everything you said but the confidence you had.. grrrr i like it so much 💗💗 i love it when people are real with their opinions.

okay ty, im sorry for rambling, gonna stop here now 😭😭

I really want to play it cool and say something like “I just don’t care what people think of me,” but honestly? Yeah I was terrified of posting my first BSD-related post.

I had been enjoying the BSD fandom from afar for about a year before posting anything about it. I’ve always had this personal pet peeve when (fictional or real) bullies get a free pass to be assholes when they’re conventionally attractive, but that applies to all fandoms, not just BSD and not just Dazai.

(Note that that’s not a moral stance, there’s nothing wrong with liking a morally grey character, and there’s nothing wrong with finding a bad (fictional or real) person to be physically attractive. This pet peeve of mine stems more from how (fictional) bullies who aren’t attractive are seen as the biggest evil unleashed upon the world, while fictional bullies who are attractive are seen as The Ideal Boyfriend)

One day I saw a post pointing out one of the things Dazai did that bothered me, and I really wanted to add to it via reblog, but I was concerned I’d derail the original post, so I screenshot it and wrote a whole follow-up rant.

Then I saved that post in my drafts for three days.

I posted something vague like “I really want to talk about this one character from this one fandom, but the fandom is very aggressive and they’d burn me at the stake if I said anything too controversial”

I don’t think I intended to explicitly tag it with anything searchable, but I must have said something like “#yeah this is about bsd those guys are scary”— apparently that counts as tagging it #bsd by tumblr’s standards, and someone from the bsd fandom (who I’m now mutuals with) responded with something like “most of us are nice! We wanna hear what you have to say!!”

That was enough motivation for me to get that post out of drafts, and even then I didn’t post it immediately. I scheduled it to post for a time when I wasn’t home, so that if there’d be backlash I wouldn’t have to witness it live and I could just delete the post later.

Not only was there no backlash, but hardly anyone saw the post. Iirc it got between 3-5 notes. That was what gave me the confidence to continue talking about my (admittedly controversial) fandom opinions.

My main blog is primarily a Shakespeare/Classic Lit blog, and the online fandom for those things encourages controversial opinions (as opposed to the standard anime blog, where it seems like posting controversy is a taboo). So once I had the confidence to interact with an anime fandom in the first place, it wasn’t too hard to post my controversial opinions, because that’s the internet culture I’m more used to.

As for how I deal with the hate, you’ll be glad to know there’s only one person on this entire site who sends (bsd-related) hate. If you’ve received any hate, it’s from her. So while I have received hate messages (everything ranging from “your blog sucks” to graphic suicide bate and murder threats), knowing it’s all from the same person makes it all pretty meaningless. Everyone else on tumblr just blocks what they don’t want to see, either by blocking blogs they’d like to avoid or by blocking tags for subjects that annoy them.

Since I tag anything that speaks of Dazai in a negative way as “#anti Dazai,” I don’t often run into people who don’t want to see negative character analysis who’ve discovered my posts accidentally.

If you want to post about something, go right ahead! The people who enjoy the content you make will follow you, and the people who don’t will block you, and everyone will curate their own tumblr experience to make this site something we can all enjoy. Admittedly if the fandom you’d like to post to is bsd, you WILL get harassed by that one person, but everyone else in this fandom has gotten harassed by her too. We mostly just ignore her at this point.

Posting controversial opinions to fandom spaces can be scary, but if you have something you’d like to post, go for it! I personally would recommend starting a side blog for it, that way if things really do get out of hand you could delete it easily without losing your tumblr account. But the most likely outcome is that it wouldn’t gain enough traction for anyone to be overly bothered by it. Controversial things are more often ignored than hated on.

(For context, I’m referring to this blog too! I’m a tiny little blog. So please don’t interpret that as some veiled insult, I’m in this group of “tiny controversial fandom blog” too)

Anyway. Best of luck to you!! And remember, the point of posting things is to have fun! If it’s causing more stress than enjoyment, there’s no shame in taking a break or logging off for a bit. I’ve taken multiple breaks, and I only post to the Anti-Dazai Series when I enjoy what I’m posting.

[Also. I absolutely love controversial fandom opinions, especially if they’re well written. It doesn’t matter to me whether or not I agree, so long as it’s a cool or original take on the source material. So if you wanna dm me, I’ll definitely follow you and your blog full of all your hottest takes]

#Anti-Dazai Asks #The internet it scary! Fandom spaces are scary!!#You’re right and I agree with you!!#The hardest part is getting started. Once you start posting the people who like your stuff will follow #Plus maybe more people agree with you than you think!!#You never know until you take the initiative #I have more mutuals here than I ever would have guessed #I think you’ll find that whatever controversial takes you have. there are more people who agree with you than you realize #I’m honored that you view me as a confident sort of person though!!#I’m actually Just Some Guy (<-girl)

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e77y · 7 days

Text

Long but relatively unserious vent/rant below the cut (sorry I added this in bc I realized how long this post is oops)

Being at the center of some kind of internet witchhunt (which ik is kind of buzzwordy but) is literally my biggest fear ohhh my god. Even a small scale one… I think I would Die. Maybe it’s because I had a similar thing happen with my friend group in high school where one of them convinced the others I was like evil and spread all these rumors about me… 😭 He was splitting on me but still. That’s an explanation, not an excuse. And it basically confirmed all of my intrusive thoughts about myself, and my personality completely self-destructed and changed, and I haven’t interacted with any of those people the same way since. I isolated from them for MONTHS and just loathed myself. Bleh

The reason it’s on my mind is bc I’ve seen this happen to friends and mutuals and even just people I’ve followed in small fandoms, where the whole fandom hates them bc of this little drama and like. I KNOW that fandom drama is not the end of the world, but truly I think that would destroy me for months. And I would never be able to set foot in those spaces again :’) Getting a handful of rude comments about a fucking transfem hc I had at like 14 made me stop writing fanfic for YEARS 😭😭😭 sigh. Just bc they said it was ‘out of character for him to want to be a girl’ 🙄 (<- character who canonically felt confident when dressed as a woman btw. initially for a disguise but then she grew to love it. BUT I DIGRESS KNSHFJW)

All this to say I think that’s why I tiptoe around everything I say online… I am SO scared of ruffling feathers, but I know that fandoms are places for like! Having fun! And it’s not a big deal! And it doesn’t affect my real life! But like idk.. I just hate the idea of being hated by anyone. I’m sure that I ANNOY some people, and that’s whatever; I talk a lot and make overly personal posts sometimes (like this lol) but I don’t wanna be HATED yk? And idek if it’s better to be hated and ostracized publicly or resented in secret by people who still interact with you… :( Agh. If you ever have an issue with me, please DM me instead of letting it build up into something worse!

ANYWAY LIKE.. with fandom stuff. Idk. I want to have fun! I want to write and post things on Tumblr and AO3 etc but I am just very scared of peoples’ opinions, especially now that I have a decently popular/well-liked longfic in DnDads. For some reason I have convinced myself that writing bad or self-indulgent NSFW will make everyone hate me lmao. Like girl the POINT of fanfic is to be self-indulgent……….. sigh I need to get out more

^ light-hearted… but also kinda true haha. I stay at home a lot just bc I don’t have many reasons to go out atm and only a handful of close friends to go out with. Hopefully that will change when I move next semester lol. And whenever I get interests, they’re VERY strong and long-lasting, and fanfic writing is one of my main hobbies, so I get REALLY into online communities. And rn that is kind of my little niche fandom Tumblr bubble… which is embarrassing and probably unhealthy but whatever. I just inevitably get a lot of anxiety about things that are important/fun to me (bc OCD), especially bc I’ve never really had mutuals/‘friends’ in a fandom before this, excluding my irls

Anyway this got longer and more vent-y than I intended so I will tag accordingly, and sorry to whoever is reading this lol; I just wanted to get my thoughts written down in a public forum bc idk… Makes me feel less insane when ik other people can see it, too. Helps me not take it too seriously and spiral lol.

#vent #cw vent #rant #delete later #<- like tomorrow morning I’m shre #usually I delete stuff like this immediately but I’ll try to keep it up #was talking to my mom earlier about OCD and intrusive thoughts and whatnot….#she definitely has it too. like undoubtedly #her intrusive thoughts and compulsions sounded exactly like mine #which sucks for me bc my dad ALSO definitely has OCD (in a more outwardly recognizable way) so! wahoo! double whammy #just feeling kinda defeated about mental health stuff #I feel like it’s never gonna get better #I need to go to therapy or a psychiatrist or SOMETHING #it’s been like 4 years now since I was originally supposed to go lol #and I keep putting it off out of fear (I think)#my friends (irls) have all been getting diagnoses and prescriptions lately #which is exciting for them but :( idk. I feel like there’s no way to medicate whatever I’ve got going on except SSRIs????#and I don’t really want that #mostly though I’m just scared of going back to therapy or to a psychiatrist bc I think they’ll think I’m lying or crazy or whatever #which sounds stupid when I write it out but idk #I should probably keep a journal but when I’m only writing for my own eyes I just kinda wallow in it and write concerning poetry lol #I like journaling in a way other people can see (even if y’all DON’T like seeing it lmaoooo) bc it makes it feel more real?#and out of my head.. concrete etc.#wackyposting #<- seriously need to change that tag still lol

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