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thebetawolfgirl · 7 months

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The Chanel Ribbon: The Wedding

Word count: 1,858

Pairing: Timmy x reader

Summary: Timmy finally marries the woman of his dreams.

Warnings: SMUT! And just pure joy, a bit of laughter and a bit of teary eyed sweetness!

The Chanel Ribbon: The Wedding

Timothée had finally proposed to his beloved y/n and they finally engaged from last month. They were sitting at home discussing wedding plans while laying on the sofa. It was proving to be difficult, because both sides of the respective families all had their opinions and suggestions about what kind of wedding they should have. One of y/n’s cousins thought they should have a big lavish wedding, an old aunt thought they should get married in a church, but although Timmy was half Christian on his dad’s side he didn’t practice.

So they had shut the curtains, switched off the phones and laptops and any other form of communication and shut everyone out.

They were currently talking about their all time favourite movie, as a break from the wedding talk.

‘We should’ve just eloped as soon as we got engaged.’ Timmy suddenly joked from his spot behind her.

Y/n chuckled but her head suddenly began to spin with ideas.

‘You’re hilarious Chalamet, but your mother would kill you.’

‘True. And if Pauline would help bury my body’ he got up asking if she wanted anything from the kitchen he shook her head no going back to her magazine.

But when he disappeared she quickly messaged Mark and asked him to do some things for her. It was a long shot but if anyone could help her with this particular thing it was his father. She sent the message and got a response almost instantly. She wrote down the information given and put it away until she perfected her plan.

Timmy came back in with some snacks and cans of soda and she smiled. ‘I said I didn’t need anything’

‘Yes but if I had just came back with snacks for me you would’ve be eating them all’ she rolled his eyes and grabbed a bag of chips.

‘Listen, I was just thinking, let’s go away for a few days. Just us, you’ll be doing SNL soon then we won’t have time. I think a few days off will be good.’

He nodded as he turned on the tv pulling her against him. ‘That’s actually a good idea, where abouts were you thinking?’

‘Hmm… How about France? Just to get away from all this stress and we can just relax.’ She looked at him nodding while watching tv.

‘We could get our own villa, with a swimming pool and I could wear that new bathing suit I bought.’

His head snapped towards her his entire attention on his fiancée now. ‘I haven’t had the chance to wear it for you with all of this going on.’

‘Uh-huh’ He watched crawl closer to him.

‘I could bring it and I could try it on-‘

‘I’ll book the tickets now’ she smiled as he grabbed his phone and started looking for early flights to France. The snacks were forgotten on the coffee table as he concentrated on his phone.

She went to move off him and he looked up frowning and whined like an injured puppy. ‘Heyyy’ he made to drag her back but she moved away. ‘I need to pack and I’ll let your parents and sister know we’re taking a few days off, then I’m all yours.’ She walked past him kissing him on the head as she did and hopped upstairs quickly texting Pauline telling her everything about her idea and for her and her parents to meet them at the exact location. Nicole called in tears saying it was such a kind and beautiful thing to do for Timmy and that he would love it. Mark called just to say ‘Thank you y/n, for doing this for my son.’

A few days later they arrived in France and it was beautiful weather despite it being August. Timmy was confused as to why y/n asked him to bring a shirt and tie and his good blazer. ‘Because we may go out to a nice restaurant and you can’t go out in your usual jeans and hoodie Timmy’ Timmy agreed reluctantly and reminded himself y/n was rarely wrong about this kind of thing and this would be the first step in obeying everything his wife wanted.

Their time in France was beautiful, they ate amazing food they visited all of the tourist attractions and Timmy even took her to where he spent his summers. They made love in the evening and she did try on that bikini and he ended up taking her right there in the swimming pool.

They ended up staying longer than intended, one day y/n wanted to go to this little village in the French countryside which Timmy found odd because there was hardly anything in it. She had told him to wear his suit and she wore his favourite dress the simple one he had bought her.

They reached the small village and they stopped in front of an old church, Timmy looked at it confused and looked back at y/n who was smiling at him.

‘Y/n, where are we?’

‘I wanted it to be a surprise.’

She spoke softly holding his hand.

‘This is the church your grandmother married your grandfather in.’

Timmy gasped and his eyes widened before filling with tears.

‘I wanted your grandmother to be with us when we got married.’

He looked back at the old church before grabbing y/n by the back of her neck and crashing his lips to hers and kissed her as the tears fell from his eyes. He broke the kiss and whispered ‘Thank you.’

She smiled nodding and took his hand leading him towards the church where his parents and his sister were waiting for them along with y/n’s parents and sister. As soon as Timmy saw his parents he rushed over to them burying his face in his mother’s shoulder sobbing gently. ‘Mama’

Y/n new he missed his grandmother dearly so it felt right to get married in the same church she did.

Timmy moved from his parents embrace and hugged his sister before turning to his future in-laws and hugging them.

After the greetings and preparations Timmy stood at the alter waiting for his bride. This was better than any lavish wedding and the fact y/n did all of this for him, in memory of his beloved grandmother sealed his confidence that this woman, this incredible beautiful woman would be his and only his. He would watch her soar with her music and they would support each other and have that happy ever after.

They exchanged their vows in French and sealed their bond with a kiss and walked up the aisle husband and wife. Equals.

They had a small private meal at their favourite in Paris and then went back to the villa. Timmy asked both families if they wanted to stay with them but they already got somewhere to stay. Y/n’s parents were staying with the Chalamet’s at the family villa.

They all bid their goodbyes and the happy couple went back alone.

Y/n smiled as she knew Timmy just wanted to get her back to the villa to have her to himself.

Her theory was proved right as soon as the front door was locked he shoved her against it and attacked her mouth.

He picked her up in his arms and carried her bridal style upstairs to their bedroom and shut the door with his foot before setting her down.

She reached for him sliding his jacket from his shoulders and letting it fall to the ground, he pulled her against him by her waist and buried his face in her neck and whispered ‘Wife’

Her breath caught in her throat and she whispered back ‘Husband’

A choked gasp escaped his throat and he groaned against her neck nipping her shoulder, they shed their clothes quickly and she pushed him gently to sit on the bed before climbing on to his lap.

The place was in darkness but he could feel her fingers trailing along his chest as she made to push him backwards, but he flipped her over so she was underneath and began kissing and nipping her lips before moving down her throat and all the way down.

She took a deep breath as she felt him at her thigh and heard him gasp and smirked. She had tied around her thigh the Chanel Ribbon instead of the traditional lace garter. She heard him groan and felt the ribbon being pulled off her leg and suddenly see him above her ‘You’re so bad’ he still had the ribbon in his mouth and she took it from between his teeth before wrapping it around his neck and tying it in a bow around his throat

‘Oh’ he breathed out softly at the feel of the satin around his neck and she grinned at his surprise.

‘You can proceed now’

He looked at her through the dark with wide eyes in shock before he dove down and began devouring her holding her legs open as she cried out and gripped his curls.

He began moving his tongue up and down her bundle of nerves before poking his tongue inside of her making her slam her hand against the railing above her head.

She knew she would have bruises where he was holding her hips down as he went down on her and she didn’t care.

She was close to coming and so pulled on his hair to bring him back up and dragged him to her by the ribbon around his throat smirking when he gasped. He groaned as he flipped them onto his back and kissed her hard before letting her sit up and sink down on him, they both groaned and started moving together. She untied the ribbon and pulled on both ends with her hand pulling him slightly and smirked as he grunted in surprise. She leaned down and met his lips and they kissed passionately as they rode each other hard.

Timmy held onto her digging his fingers into the skin of her back leaving scratches and slamming his hips against hers meeting her force before rolling them over and burying his face into her neck. His arms were trapped around her shoulders underneath and he could feel her dragging her nails down his back. He growled out against her neck at the sting of her nails and grabbed the bed railing using it for leverage and slammed into her harder, hearing her small gasps against his shoulder ‘T-Tim- I’m-‘

She cut off and arched into him as he thrust a few more times before coming with her his hand sliding down the headboard as they breathed heavily against each other.

After catching their breathes they lay in bed together and he played with their entwined fingers as she lay her head on his shoulder. He looked at their wedding rings and smiled softly as they glowed in the dim light of the moon shining through the open window.

‘This was just the beginning’ was Timmy’s last thought before he fell asleep in her arms!

@sufferingstarlight

@kteezy997

@lixzey

@gatoenlaciudad

#lil timmy tim #timothèe chalamet #timothée hal chalamet #timmy fanfics #timothée x reader #timothee chalamet smut

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swordsarereallycool · 3 years

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Yo this is to Ukulele players and/or singers

I created this horrific masterpiece but I can’t really sing so could someone record a good version of this and send it to me please or use #betty x yeet

*Betty - Taylor swift

** Yeet! -SNL

#snl #Pete Davidson #timothee chalamet #lil Timmy Tim #Betty #folklore #Taylor swift #music #ukulele #singing #Betty x Yeet

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liltimmy-tea · 6 years

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timmy via instagram story backstage at snl with kid cudi. the fanboy jumped out.

#timothee chalamet #timothée chalamet #armie x timothee #beautifulboy #call me by your name #hot summer nights #hsn #lil timmy tim #liltimmyt #timmychalamet #timmyt #snl #kid cudi

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cocosstories · 3 years

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Timothee Chalamet One Shot

Prompts:

timothee chalamet x reader smut, there first time together

Heyy love your blog! I wanted to request something with timotheé chalamet but the plot is completely up to you. much love from Germany ♡♡♡

Warning: Smut

You and your boyfriend, Timothee were just leaving Studio 8H, heading back to his place after his debut hosting gig on Saturday Night Live.

"You were so amazing babe!"

You say as the two of you climb into the back of a cab.

"Thank you baby. I'm so glad you were there. I couldn't have done it without you."

He replies as you cuddle up next to him, his hand on your knee.

You and Timothee had been dating for a while now and with both of your hectic schedules, you hadn't seen much of eachother.

Now, after his SNL appearance, you had a few weeks to reconnect and just be happy together and you planned on taking full advantage of it.

When you get to his place, the two of you waste no time, pulling at eachothers clothes while you kiss deeply, heading towards his bedroom.

The feeling of his lips on yours was enough to drive you wild and you wanted nothing more than to give yourself to him fully for the first time.

"Are you sure about this?"

He asks, being the true gentleman he was.

"I've never been more sure of anything in my entire life."

It wasn't that it was your first time ever but he knew that you had wanted your first time together to be special and he knew three o' clock in the morning after work wasn't exactly what you had had in mind.

With your answer given, Timothee gives up his own reservations and pulls you down on the bed with him, your lips never leaving his.

"God, you're beautiful."

He says, caressing your now, nearly naked body.

Shivers go down your spine at his touch and the look in his eyes and you can hardly stand the fact that his lips aren't somehow connected to your body.

His hand slides down your torso and to the hem of your underwear, hovering for a moment before he slides his hand inside.

You moan as he plays with you, teasing a bit before pressing his fingers into your sensitive folds.

His lips find yours again and soon your core is aching for more.

"Timmy, I need you. Please."

You beg.

He smirks and gets up, pulling your underwear off before taking off his own.

He climbs back into bed and on top of you, his hardened member hovering at your entrance for just a moment before he slowly eases himself inside you.

You claw at his back as he increases his thrusts while sucking on your neck.

He fists the sheets as you moan together, each feeling the similar sensation of heat rising in your bodies.

"Holy shit."

He grunts out feeling you tighten around him, almost losing control.

"Deeper!"

He somehow regains his composure, thrusting harder while you buck your hips and begg him to go deeper.

He reaches down between the two of you, his fingers playing with your clit until you tighten around him once again and cum, the sensation cause him to come as well.

"Fuck."

You breathe out a few minutes later as you both try to catch your breaths.

"You can say that again."

He chuckles, moving from on top of you to next to you on the bed, pulling you close to him.

"Was it worth the wait?"

He whispers in your ear tiredly.

You smile and nod.

"So worth it."

Feedback is always welcomed and greatly appreciated

#timothee chalamet smut #timothee chalamet one shot #timothee chalamet x reader #timothee chalamet

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televisionboy · 3 years

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this gif is everything skdjdjfn and this is my first alphabet! so give me love and constructive criticism.

taglist: @punkgeekchic @visionsofsweettea @adoresobs @am4sawa @reblogsfandom @evarolines @somethingstuffy

Timothee Chalamet Fluff Alphabet

A ctivities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

Dates with Timothee are very very comforting and new at the same time. He LOVES getting out of the house and going to a city where shops are lining every corner and small cafes with coffee to die for. But he also loves to cook you dinner and rehash your days. He’s quite a domestic person.

B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

Timothee finds all of you attractive. But his favorite thing to do is whenever you’re reading a book or the two of you are watching TV, and you’re at one end of the couch and he’s at the other end, he loves to run his hands up and down your legs while they rest in his lap. Drumming his fingers against your knees is like a calming thing

C omfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?

He doesn’t talk, at all. He’s an incredibly patient boyfriend who will sit there with you and sync your breathing while hugging you. He will listen for hours and hours to you talk about it. And if not, he makes tea for you and offers cuddles and comfortable silences. I mean, either way he always makes tea.

D reams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?

He would love a family with you, he knows you’d be an incredible parent to his children. But he’s content being young, having new experiences and getting to be spontaneous. If he had to think about it, he’d like one or two children and maybe a dog. Living in a cozy but spacious home, of course there’s a pool in the back.

E qual - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?

well, when he’s in the mood, jealous/mad he definitely will be dominant (and especially in bed) but he’s in no way so dominant that you will feel like his maid or a child. But he really doesn’t want to consider your relationship to be that way. Both of you are just you and treat each other equally.

F ight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?

He gets cold when he’s fighting with you. Timothee’s a bit like a younger sibling while fighting, he knows how to push your buttons and won’t stop until he see’s a reaction. But he has that guilty feeling wash over him so fast. He’s very very easy to forgive you because how could he say no to someone like you??

G ratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?

SO GRATEFUL. He spoils like no other. If you point out that you like a pair of earrings, they’re yours (it doesn’t matter that they’re pure diamonds) you mentioned that you want to see Italy? Tickets booked. And a great thing about him, on top of being a good listener is that he has a great eye. And he picks up on things and is quick to notice them. Which is a big reason he’s so successful in acting. Even if it’s something as simple as washing the dishes so he can relax, to something as kind as making him your very own fan gift.. he melts every time.

H onesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?

Mmm, he certainly tries not to but everyone keeps secrets. There are things that both of you prefer to keep private but he wouldn’t keep something like him kissing another woman a secret.

I nspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?

You’ve inspired him and fueled him to become a stronger actor even if you’re not one yourself. Some of your advice is seriously helpful, and some are unhelpful but hilarious. No matter what you will tell him, he knows you’re waiting at home or even at his set with open arms, waiting for him to win an award and fangirl online to other Timmy fans. It makes him blush and cause a billion butterflies to erupt in his stomach.

J ealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

He trusts you 100% that you would never leave him, and he doesn’t want to be one of those boyfriends who restricts their partner. But there’s a part of him that’s incredibly insecure and is convinced you can do better. There are some parts that WANT you to leave him and do better. He would never ever show it in public, but you can read him well. You’ll put a hand on his bouncing knee and kiss his jaw.

K iss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?

He knows he’s a damn good kisser as well as charmer. You had been on a couple of dates with him, on one you mentioned that it was on your bucket list to be kissed in the rain. He made sure to schedule a date when there would be rain and he took you on a picnic. Towards the end, it had started to pour and you were trying to run back to the car but he grabbed your face and kissed you so hard but so passionately. His curls were dripping and the sandwiches were ruined but the feeling was incredible.

L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

Rightttt after that kiss, in the car you were drying off and laughing with him while the radio was on in the background. The car was on but he wasn’t driving. Instead, he turned to you and told you he was in love with you. Both of you had said “love you” but never “i’m in love with you”

M arriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?

He’s on the fence about babies but he knows for certain that he wants to marry you. You know that scene in The Office where Jim shows the engagement ring for Pam and is like “I got it 3 weeks into dating”? That’s Timmy.

He brings you to a premire of one of his movies and at the end when all the credit’s are rolling, it says “y/n will you marry me?” and when you turn back around, Timmy is on one knee and Armie is most likely behind him crying his eyes out.

N icknames - What do they call their s/o?

“Babe” “Baby” “Mon cherie” When you two are married, he’ll join you in the kitchen while cooking dinner and call you “Mrs Chalamet” before kissing your shoulder and beginning to chop veggies. It’s just incredibly domestic

O n Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

so so so obvious and so in love. He shows you off as much as possible and talks about you on talk shows until he’s sure that the audience is annoyed and SNL mocks him (and even then, he’ll continue)

P DA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?

he brags but he does know when to dial it back for your own privacy and humility. BUT that doesn’t mean he won’t hold your hand in public, or banter with you on a twitter thread even if you both are right next to each other on the couch playing footsie

Q uirk - Some random ability they have that’s beneficial in a relationship.

He has a great eye and is quick to pick up on things. It’s almost as if he has certain senses and can tell when you’re having a bad day or upset. He just knows. It’s incredible. He’ll run you a bath and order cake to indulge yourself in before you even get home.

R omance - How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?

The most sickley, fluffy, romantic, boyfriend that it makes me sick. Timothee would dye his hair rainbow and cut of his toes if it meant you would smile. On a more romantic note, he pulls out all the stops but it’s a bit more subtle?? Like he is very romantic but it’s not overwhelming. There’s no string quartet and private dining room but there will be jazz and dancing at midnight or a homemade “restaurant” with Timothee as a one man (messy) staff but it’s the best thing you could have ever come home to

S upport - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?

He’s your head cheerleader and the most selfless human ever. Will cheer for you until his voice goes mute and even then, he’s the one clapping the loudest and crying the most.

T hrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?

both! Timothee is like a dog in some ways. He’s energetic and needs new things, to be outside, to be social. But he craves hugs and cuddling, he adores late night talks with you or watching you make him breakfast while he scrolls through Instagram. Like I said, a very domestic guy.

U nderstanding - How good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?

He know’s you like the back of his hand and he could spot you with his eyes closed and only by feeling your face. He knows your habits, and the food you hate, your terrible cooking skills, and the kind of dad jokes you tell, the anxiety ticks, and what shows you’ll watch over and over again.

V alue - How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?

He’d go insane without you. You’re addictive because you have a pure heart and a dirty mind and he falls in love the more you show that. He brings you back the weirdest things that remind him of you. Stationary cards with odd quotes, an antique necklace from the 40′s, peach earrings (because he enables your teasing)

W ild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon.

He’s like the real version of “JOEY DOESN’T SHARE FOOD” but a little more loving lol “I love you, but I’m willing to defend my fries”

X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

I said that he’s like a puppy! he needs kisses and scratches to his head (free scalp massage) and he’s a clingy puppy too. i mean, look at his eyes for the love of god.

Y earning - How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?

he aches so bad. He is your cheerleader but he can’t function without you. You’re his cup of coffee, an antidepressant. He’s fangirling inside for your new project but when he sees your mug or reaches to bring you close to his chest and you’re not there, he’s unable to fall asleep or make a cup of coffee.

Z eal - Are they willing to go to great lengths for the relationship? If so, what kind of?

He’d travel to Mars and back if you asked him to. Just ask him, and he does it. One time, he was working on a movie with an actress who was quite snippy to you and he quit immediately, feeling incredibly guilty and nauseous. He got you very expensive lox and bagels one morning because you were whining about it the previous night. He doesn’t want to close his eyes at night because there’s so many things he wants to do before he goes on to the next day. But when he closes his eyes at night, it’s all you, you, you, you, you and how much he’s overwhelmed with total adoration for you

#timothee chalamet imagine #timothee chalamet #timothee chalamet x you #timothee chalamet icons #timothee chalamet x reader #timothee chalamet smut #fluff #fluff alphabet #x reader #x you

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rememberwehadthestars · 6 months

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#timothée chalamet #troye sivan #snl x timmy #snl #this skit is amazing in so many ways #I love it #rememberwehadthestars gifs

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chris-evanslover · 4 years

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✨Masterlist✨

Join my Taglist!!

*-indicates smut

OFC=Original Fictional Character

Chris Evans

Captain Patriotic Part 2 OFC Samara meets Chris at a patriots game (Fluff)

Premiere Blues Actress! reader meets Chris at a marvel premiere (Fluff)

Jump Your Bones* You and Chris do the dirty for the first time (Smut)

Last Swim Before The Pool Hibernates* Chris’ Instagram story stirs up some sexual tension (Smut)

Scarlett Special Scarlett introduced you and Chris way back when, years later you’re married and telling the story on a virtual interview (Fluff)

Tom Holland

All Around the World You and Tom get ready for an early flight on a press tour (Fluff)

All is Fair in Love and War Best Friends Tom and OFC Lia get into an argument which leads Tom’s jealousy to snap and confesses his feelings (Angst + Fluff)

Warming* C*ckwarming with Tom (Smut)

Nails and New Meetings Running into Tom’s mom at the nail salon, having not met her yet you don’t realize who you’re talking to (Fluff)

Homesick Tom looks upset/off in new fan pictures, you give him a call to cheer him up (Fluff)

Are We Friends? Tom meets Y/N at Zendayas photo shoot (going to be multipart) (Fluff)

Timothée Chalamet

SNL Part 1; SNLWriter!reader x Timmy boy (Fluff) Part 2

Joe Burrow

1. Easy there, Tiger

#chris evans #chris evans x reader #chris evans fanfiction #chris evans one shot #chris evans imagine #chris evans masterlist #tom holland #tom holland x reader #tom holland smut #tom holland imagine #tom holland one shot #tom holland fanfiction #tom holland masterlist #chris evans smut #timothee chamalet #timothee chalamet imagine #timothée hal chalamet

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nellipot · 6 years

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@SNL please call me or credit me when you use this

This is what Timothée Chalamet’s monologue would (will) be if (when) he hosts SNL (in play format)

[pan over golden clock to stage and band] Announcer: And your host, Timothée Chalamet

[crowd goes nuts, Timmy walks out in a turtleneck made solely of rainbow pom-poms, saggy jeans, and white Gucci high-tops. He’s smiling wide, rubbing his hands together, trying to look at everyone screaming his name personally, in the eyes, acknowledging them in a pointing/prayer hands hybrid]

Timmy: Oh man thank you so much, this is, Oh My God. I’m on SNL!!! [squealing, holding clasped fingers under his chin, swaying slightly]

[crowd claps and cheers, dying down when he shoos them off with his hands]

Timmy: I am so happy to be here man??? I’ve been watching this show since I was nine years old you know, so like, coming up on five years now.

[crowd laughs and he swats at them again, tipping his head back and smiling with his eyes closed]

Timmy: NAH nah, I’m not 14 I swear to god, I have my own apartment, I pay bills, I only watch Peppa Pig when it’s on [hand is splayed out assuringly]

Timmy: [through crowds laughter] I don’t DVR it! [repeats it softer under his breath when the crowd quiets] I don’t DVR it.

Timmy: I’m so excited to be here promoting my new movie Beautiful Boy [waits for crowd to stop cheering] it is a movie in which I do not masturbate on screen! [eyebrows up, knowingly, at crowd, hands joined together and wielded in victory] [crowd cheers and laughs] That’s all you need to know [hands draw an X in the air before joining back together again]

Timmy: [feigned frown] No yeah it’s really weird how every script throws that in there -

[Cecily Strong walks on stage, waits for crowd to stop clapping]

Cecily: Timmy, Timmy -

Timmy: Hey! Hey Cecily, um [holds up palms helplessly and mumbles] Trying to do my monologue hereee... what’s up?

Cecily: It’s just that, I think we have a problem with the third sketch?? [looks concernedly at a piece of paper she’s holding]

Timmy: Oh! Oh man, why?

Cecily: We didn’t realize that we forgot to write you masturbating in it...

[Timmy scrubs his face while the crowd laughs, in shock, Cecily shakes her head and pretends to try and explain]

Timmy: [says through gritted teeth with a forced smile at the crowd] You know it’s in my contract to get to do that...

Cecily: [whispering back] I know, I know I’m so, I’ll get it fixed.

Timmy: [nodding and clapping his hands together] Okay, great, great, thank you.

Cecily: [at the same time] Right away, right away [exits]

[Timmy looks back at the crowd and smiles as they cheer on the bit]

Timmy: Really it’s been an insane year, I was in 2 independent films last year [crowd already cheering] Lady Bird and Call Me By Your Name! [cheering gets louder]

Timmy: In Lady Bird I played a high schooler who thought flip phones were trying to track our every move; this scene was a challenge, seeing as I had no idea what a flip phone was.

[crowd laughs and claps]

Timmy: [mumbling, looking taken aback] another young joke, very original [biting his lip, shaking his head. shrugging as the crowd laughed]

Timmy: In Call Me By Your Name I play Elio Perlman [nods in respect] who is a precocious young teen that falls in love with Armie Hammer. [Crowd cheers loudly] Armie Hammer and I got very close on set, and he promised he would be watching tonight, [starts reaching into his back pocket] and I’ve been so busy, so I thought I would respond to his texts on live TV [laughs at himself, crowd cheers even louder. scrolls through phone with a focused expression]

Timmy: Alright... wow there’re a lot. Okay... Yes. [looks up at the camera and nods, looks back down at phone] [crowd laughs] No [frowns, incredulous, keeps scrolling] [crowd laughs] [makes a pensive look before looking up at the camera] If I had to choose? Your blue one is the comfiest, but the black one makes you look hotter [looks back down. crowd laughs] [clutches hand on his chest and looks bashful] I love you too man! We have a great show for you tonight! Kid Cudi is here! [crowd cheers] [first year cast come up on stage and hand him a baseball cap] [Timmy puts it on backwards, pulls off sweater to reveal T-shirt that says ‘Lil Timmy T’]

Timmy: [Dancing, smooth and seductive with the cast, pouting and thrusting as he does with his rap persona] Stick around we’ll be right back!

#timothée chamalet #if he's not on SNL its okay because he has been in my head

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