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#she had good intentions and was trying to break the cycle she just didn’t do it correctly

erogenousmind · 2 years

Text

Nothing

When David woke in the morning, Kim had already been awake for a while. She lay on her back next to him, still naked from the night before. And she was staring directly up at the ceiling, unblinking. Her face was expressionless.

Concerned, David rolled on to his side toward her and placed a hand affectionately on her arm. “Morning, babe. Everything alright? Did you sleep okay?”

Kim responded, her eyes still focused above them. “Something changed last night. You did something. It worked too well. Or it finally worked well enough. But it’s gone now. There’s nothing left...”

David’s eyes widened. His lover’s ominous response had him immediately turning his mind back to the previous night. He had done something? What had he done? Was she okay?

The events of the previous night were crystal clear in Kim’s mind as she had been going over them again and again since she woke up. To a point they were clear at least. There was a blankness at some point of which she was fully aware, although it didn’t really concern her.

They had been better rested and had more free time in their evening than they were used to. And even more importantly, they knew they weren’t needed for anything the next morning. So David and Kim had done what they often did when time and energy allowed.

David could remember clearly the look of Kim, naked save for a single piece of lingerie, on her knees at the foot of their bed. He remembered how beautiful she looked. He remembered the intensity of her stare.

Kim remembered the watch, the way it swung. She remembered the way it became difficult for her eyes to focus and how she would be distracted for a moment catching his eyes behind the watch, captivating her almost as much as it did.

David remembered how sexy her moans were. The surrender in her voice as she accepted every suggestion he gave her. He remembered the way her thighs started to drift apart as she sank deeper and the way her hand wandered along her skin as he reminded her how much pleasure she received from pleasing him. He remembered how wet she was when he finally took her.

Kim remembered his words. Remembered herself repeating them. Remembered being made to describe how her will was being broken by the hypnotic power he had over her:

“I can’t resist you.”

“You control my mind and body.”

“I need to obey you.”

“My thoughts belong to you.”

“Giving in gives me pleasure.”

“Obedience is pleasure.”

“I must obey.”

She had been cycling through those mantras since she woke up this morning. Trying to understand what they had done. Feeling them sink deeper into her mind. Remembering the pleasure she felt at his command as she spoke them. The memory of them was starting to affect her again. She could feel the heat rising from between her legs.

“Kim...” David spoke, breaking her reverie. He studied her expression intently. The recollection of how their night had ended gave him confidence that she was alright. That she was his.

“You...broke something last night.” Kim wasn’t sure how else to describe it. “I’ve gone so deep for you before but something happened. Maybe it all just added up over time or maybe it was how good it felt to submit or the light reflecting off the watch or the pleasure I felt while you programmed me or... It’s gone. My resistance is just gone. I’m yours.”

“Gone?” David asked. He began running his hand up and down Kim’s side and she had to stifle a moan.

“We’ve played at me not being able to fight, not being able to resist you. But it always felt like I was making the decision to give in. That the little voice that watches over me even when I give myself to you is ready to step in. But she’s gone now. Dissolved into whatever happened last night. You can make me do anything. Make me be anything. I couldn’t even put up a token resistance. All I can do is obey.” The more she spoke, the more it excited Kim and the effect on her voice was obvious. That in turn started exciting David more.

“And you’re just going to let me know this. That I can do whatever I want with you, whenever I want and all you can do is eagerly comply with my every wish?” David was a mix of incredulous and teasing. The idea of her being completely at his mercy had excited them both during many an evening together.

“I trust you. And I’d rather you find out now than let it surprise you. You should know what you can do to me now. I’m completely yours after all. It wouldn’t do to keep secrets from my owner.”

David started to laugh when he realized Kim’s face was still completely deadpan. He froze for a moment, thinking. She was his now. Totally and completely his. He looked at her, considered how beautiful she was. David came to a decision.

“Alright then. We should get started.” He said, solemnly.

For the first time since David had woken, Kim seemed to snap out of her fugue. She looks over at him, a quizzical look on her face. “Get started? With what?”

“If you are going to be mine, we’ll want you to be perfect for me. I’ll need to train you to be my perfect hypnotized slave. Make sure you can serve me exactly how you always dreamed you could. I’ll need to start making changes to how you think, how you respond to me, what you like, what excites you...”

“O..okay...” Kim stammered. David fixed her with a stern look. Kim struggled under his gaze, feeling the power of her new owner’s eyes. “Y...Yes...Sir?” she tried again.

David nodded. “Very good. Now show me how impossible it is for you to resist me. Feel my voice taking over your thoughts. Feel it pulling you down into trance. Feel you will dissolving away. Feel how eager you are to drop and be trained to serve.”

“Yeesssssir.” Kim was staring into his eyes still. She could feel his words taking effect. She noticed the conspicuous absence of that voice in her head that would let her know if it was alright to drop. There was only obedience. Nothing else was left.

“In a moment I am going to command you to drop into a deep hypnotic sleep, and you know that all you need is that one word for me and you will have no choice but to instantly obey. And that will feel so good and so powerful when a single word from your owner is enough to entrance you completely. To leave you blank and mindless and eager to be brainwashed. And it will feel so good to be so deeply controlled, won’t it, slave?”

Kim shuddered in anticipation. Her voice was faint, already losing herself to his words, but it dripped with arousal. “Yes, Master...”

“Sleep”

And then, there was nothing for Kim but obedience.

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stoat-party · 1 year

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My lukewarm takes on Romeo and Juliet characters, heavily influenced by the specific production I watched yesterday

Romeo: So extra. Absolute drama king. He would watch Encanto and not be able to stop thinking about it for a month. He absolutely fell in love twice in a week based purely on looks, but that love was pure and romanticized to no end. In his mind, it was worth dying for. He should have been allowed to be a stupid kid, but under the circumstances he felt forced to marry in secret.

Juliet: Every adult in this girl’s life failed her. Of course she fell in love with Romeo, she’s thirteen. Their relationship isn’t particularly profound, it’s their devotion. Their innocence. When you were a thirteen-year-old girl, didn’t you fantasize about doing something drastic just to make your father understand? She’s the girl who acted on that fantasy, in the most horrible way. And she’s a child. A baby. They’re all just babies.

Paris: Himbo. Yeah, he tried to marry a thirteen-year-old girl. Yeah, he’s probably an adult by our standards, or close to it. However misguided his feelings toward her, though, they were real. He felt protective toward this girl he’d barely met. That wasn’t the blood feud talking. It was his meathead himbo brain. What caused this man to think it was okay to marry a little girl? How was he so casual about it? Why so violent? We’ll never know.

Benvolio: Shares an archetype with Horatio. Guy who lives, but at what cost? When I read the play he seemed like the sweet, reasonable one, but this production really played up the teenaged boyness of it all. The important parts to him, though, are that he loved Romeo, and he didn’t want any of this. Noticeably absent in the final acts.

Mercutio: Baby. Actual tiny baby man. I read this book when I was fifteen, I had no maternal feelings toward any of these kids, but this actor’s Mercutio broke me. He was just a little goofball from a rich family, he had no concept of consequences. The actor was an adult but somehow made his voice crack. When he started a swordfight over a cause that had nothing to do with him, it was like I was watching a puppy trying to play keep-away with a tiger. Tybalt even backed off and tried to sheathe his sword, but Mercutio gave him a little *boop* on the backside and it started again. His death scene started off laughing and ended in screaming. After Act III, all jokes in the play cease.

Nurse: I just feel bad for whoever gets cast as the nurse to get insulted for three hours.

Friar Lawrence: Who does this guy think he is? Okay, he couldn’t have predicted the plague or the duel, but he seems very confident about courses of action that have a high likelihood of ending in tragedy. The lesson is, don’t enable teen hormones just because you think it’ll help you end a blood feud. I can’t discount his good intentions, though, and the kids would probably have been worse off without him.

Tybalt: I seethe.

Lord Capulet: I’m doing this for your own good but also I’ll ruin your life if you disobey ok? <3

Lady Capulet: She definitely shares some of the blame for what happened, but her love was genuine. She had been brought into this cycle at Juliet’s age, how was she supposed to break out?

Lady Montague: idk why shakespeare thought killing her offstage was necessary. we don’t even find out until after the climax so why? it’s more thematically consistent if all the deaths are young people.

Rosaline: If thou findeth thyself in a Shakespearean tragedy, get thee to a nunnery.

#romeo and juliet #romeo montague #romeo #juliet capulet #juliet #shakespeare #mercutio #tybalt #tybalt capulet #benvolio #benvolio montague #william shakespeare #romeo & juliet

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raayllum · 1 year

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intention vs reception, and breaking the cycle

I think one of the best ways TDP talks about family / cultural dynamics is how things can be taken in ways differently than they were meant to, particularly when it comes to parents and children. Dynamics and interpretations are a two way street, and your reasoning for something may not be something someone else can see, and they’ll make up another reasoning for it on their own end.

We see this pretty specifically with Harrow and Callum.

Harrow puts up a distance because he 1) wants to honour Callum’s possible relationship with his deceased biological father and 2) likely feels guilty over Sarai, and Callum growing up in the shadow of that grief.

H: Over the years, there have been moments where I let there be a distance between us. Because I’m your stepfather, I was trying to give you the space I thought you needed to love your real father, even though he passed away. Now I wonder if I should have held you closer. I wonder if showing you how much I loved you would have been okay, and would not have disrespected your relationship with him. Callum, I know I’m not your birth father, but in my eyes and in my heart, you are my son. I see myself in you. I’m proud of you. And I love you unconditionally.

So we know Harrow had nothing but good intentions, but those moments of distance - of Harrow trying to give Callum more thoughtfulness, not less - led to Callum being insecure and distant over his spot in the family, doubtful that Harrow truly thought of him as his son, exacerbated by Harrow’s royal status that Callum was married into through his mother. This was never Harrow’s intention, but Callum responded to how he was being treated and then conjured up his own reasonings that made sense to him to explain it.

E: Callum, why don’t you just call him Dad? C: Because he’s the king. And I’m his stepson. E: I think he would want you to. If you wanted to.

Their full understanding of each other comes too late, but it’s no less meaningful for Callum. Even if discussing and getting there wasn’t easy.

We see Ezran struggle with this too, of what to take from his father (“I just wish Dad was here - he’d know what to do, y’know?”) as well as what to leave behind (“I don’t want to be that kind of king”). Rayla has a similarly complex relationship with her parents. Is feeling abandoned how Lain and Tiadrin meant to make her feel in Bloodmoon Huntress? Of course not. Was the other side of that when Rayla makes her peace with it supposed to give her this highly dangerous risk taking personality where she’ll go off alone in misguided attempts to protect people? Of course not.

The same way that no matter how angry, Runaan never would’ve wanted her to be Ghosted (he tried multiple times to send her home). He took her off the mission to protect her, not because she was ‘weak.’ The same way that Runaan was the best of his village / culture - a brave and selfless man who wanted to protect his people - and yet could also be cruel and unyielding in the face of innocence that didn’t fit with his preconceived notions. Even the whole “do not show fear” was likely meant to be far more akin to “don’t let fear control you” but as always, cultures are made up of people, and people are flawed and varied in their interpretations, and how they manifest them:

“It’s okay to miss them,” she said gently.

“But it doesn’t do anything.”

“Feelings aren’t about productivity or results,” she said. Maybe a little ironically considering she was a Moonshadow elf, he thought at first, or maybe exactly why, when she finished. “They’re just our responses. Our reactions. We can only control them so much. And Garlaff knows they aren’t always rational, even if they’re what we feel.”

“I thought Moonshadow elves were against letting your emotions rule you.”

“We are,” she said. “Because it’s about controlling how you respond in the wake of your emotions, but we cannot make ourselves totally unfeeling. No matter how much we may wish we could, sometimes.” She smiled sadly. “But we do sometimes work too hard to control how we respond, to the point of shutting them down. Some of us are better at that than others.”

“You don’t have to tell me that,” he said, his lips twitching upwards. “I’m engaged to Rayla.”

“Which is why if you can’t control it—if you miss someone, in spite of everything—maybe it’s okay. I’ve seen your fear and aspects of your grief rule you, Callum. I’ve never seen you treat anyone worse for it.”

“Yeah, well...” He turned back towards the window. He thought of losing his temper with Ezran at Katolis, or the Caldera; Rayla at the Nexus after Claudia (a grimace tugged at his mouth) told him about Harrow. “I’m a lot better at that than I was when I was a kid.”

—Chapter 11 of “If Time Is Money,” published March 2020

We see this play out with Lissa and her children in particular, even more than with Viren perhaps. Lissa didn’t mean to give Claudia the trauma she did. She was doing her best to do the right thing by giving her children agency alongside Viren, and then trying to help them stay together. But that doesn’t mean there wasn’t massive harm done anyway.

And it’s these gaps in interpretation and intention versus consequence that make these dynamics real and viable and well, emotionally poignant. We can do massive harm to one another, even when it’s the opposite of our intentions (Viren and Harrow are a fantastic, mutual example of this, and so is Callum and Rayla’s post-TTM fallout).

Because, especially as these child characters grow older, eventually what we do with those interpretations fully become our own actions. None of them have had to go down the roads they have. Yes, our childhood experiences and the choices our parents make effect us, but we also 100% have the power to make different decisions and grow beyond those interpretations. That’s what Breaking the Cycle is all about. But...

E: Because people are still hurting and they are still angry. We can’t ignore that, or pretend it will go away.

And I also think this commonality of difference between intention vs reception, shall we say, is also why Harrow’s advice in regards to how to break the cycle and free yourself from the past emphasizes understanding and imagination.

H: Reject the chains of history. Do not let the past define your future, as I did. Free yourself from the past. Learn from it, understand it, then let it go. Create a brighter future from your own hearts and imaginations.

Over and over, we see characters (mostly antagonists and villains, but not always) insist that things have to go a certain way. We have to do this. I have to do that. This is the way things have always been. We must prevent a terrible future born from apparent weakness.

History - of our families, of our lives, of ourselves, of our communities - demand certain things, and we can be chained down by those things so easily out of obligation, or fear, or guilt, or trying to find some way to feel loved or important. But, in reality

You just have to be willing to imagine something new, that the cycle can be broken, that you can be something else than what you were. You just have to try - and it is never too late to start trying.

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theerurishipper · 9 months

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Do you think Adricat hates himself?

Hi!

I wouldn’t say hate, but he does have very low self-worth. He believes very sincerely that no one could like him as he is, so he has to put on masks and act a certain way around them to please them. So he can never be himself, and he doesn’t think that anyone would like him if he behaved like he wanted to. This is, as all things are, Gabriel’s fault. We see him say many times that Adrien is overly emotional, and Gabriel wants nothing but perfection from him. If Adrien acts out, he gets punished, and if he conforms perfectly to Gabriel’s wishes, he just gets neglected, and maybe gets a scrap of attention from him if he’s really lucky.

Because of Gabriel’s controlling nature and his tendency to deny Adrien any affection unless he acts like he wants, Adrien has internalized the idea that love is conditional and that he has to earn it by pleasing the people around him. Which is why Chat Noir is so healing for him (until Season 4). It’s not the “true” him or anything, because Chat Noir is still a mask. He swings to the opposite end of the metaphorical pendulum there and acts out a lot, so even though it’s part of who he is, it’s still an exaggeration and not all of who he is. But he doesn’t have to please anyone in that role. Ladybug accepts him, cat puns and all, and he gets to be free. It’s an escape from his abusive home.

He occasionally tries to act out and go after what he wants as Adrien, but most of the time, he does listen to his father. Because this is how abusers like Gabriel behave. It’s a cycle. Gabriel is controlling, Adrien listens to him, Adrien gets tired of it at some point and tries to rebel, Gabriel gaslights and manipulates him, Adrien listens to him again. If it gets to be too much for Adrien and he seems very ready to fight for it, Gabriel offers him the smallest of concessions and the slightest bit of attention so that he won’t try to break free of him, and it starts all over again. I don’t have enough faith in the writers anymore to know if this was intentional, but it’s a very accurate portrayal of an abuser. Adrien expresses disappointment with Gabe sometimes in the early seasons, but he still makes excuses for his behavior because he loves Gabriel and believes the best of him, and wants Gabriel to love him.

Gabe is a master at gaslighting. In The Collector, Gabriel had a copy of his book the whole time, and he still pretended that Adrien had hurt him, and threw all that stuff in his office around to make it look like he was deeply distraught, all so that he could hammer it into Adrien that it was his fault. And again in Illusion, when he goes on bemoaning about what he did wrong in raising Adrien when he knew Adrien was listening so that he could make him feel guilty. All this just reinforces in Adrien that it is his fault if Gabriel doesn’t love him, that he’s not good enough as himself because he makes Gabriel sad and hurt by being that way, and that he has to pretend to be perfect for him and everyone else. If someone doesn’t love him, it’s his own fault. If someone is upset with him, it can’t be anything other than his fault.

Gabe says things like “You’re too emotional to be allowed to make decisions, it’s your fault,” and Adrien believes him. He’s not good as himself, he has to be perfect. He has to be exactly who the other person wants him to be. This is what he did in Kuro Neko with Ladybug. He thought she didn’t like him as he was, so he tried to be the partner she wanted him to be. It’s why he always downplays his own emotional needs and feelings, because he’s been told that his emotions don’t matter and that they are a burden, and so he can’t bother other people by having them. That they won’t like him if he shows them his true feelings, and in fact they'll be hurt.

So to actually answer your question, I don’t think he hates himself. Hate is a pretty strong word. But he doesn't have much self-esteem and self-worth. He doesn’t dislike himself so much as he doesn’t really know who “himself” is, because he’s been forced to conform to Gabe’s expectations of who he should be his whole life. I hope this answers your question.

Thank you for your ask!

#MLB #Miraculous Ladybug #Adrien Agreste #Chat Noir #Gabriel Agreste #Meta #My meta #Asks #Abuse tw #Abuse cw

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raainberry · 8 months

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jeongyeon + promise - laufey

Voicemail

« Voicemail is an afterthought, voice messaging is proactive. »

Jeongyeon x gn!reader

Angst

synopsis - it hurt being with her, and it hurt not being with her. maybe if one of you had acted before it was too late, it would have hurt less either way.

word count - 803

A/N - I’m not gonna lie, it took a while for me to get inspired by the combo and I don’t like forcing things. I let it marinate in the back of my mind and this is what I ended coming up with. I’m happy with how it came out, and I only hope you do too! Also I hope you like angst or else this is gonna be awkward too.

A stranger with similar looks.

That was all it took for you to break. You pulled out your phone within the same minute, not even bothering to try and fight your drunken thoughts.

They always won when you were sober anyway.

Although you never went as far as you went that night.

It took you a couple tries, failing to tap the call button through the faint blur of your dilated pupils.

But you did it.

You dialed her number.

She didn’t answer.

Unsurprising outcome, but it didn’t keep you from getting mad until you noticed the dark skies above your head. The night was young in L.A. That, according to an old habit, meant she was probably busy working at this time.

You chuckled at the familiar thought process. It was bitter out your lips, yet your thoughts remained so sweet when it came to her.

“We didn’t even say goodbye.” You mumbled to yourself.

Then made sure you told her that after the tone.

You rambled on for two minutes.

Jeongyeon stared at the notification longer than that.

Seemed as though you had things to say. Things she debated intensely with herself on whether or not she should hear.

She found herself wondering about what had pushed you to reach out. It was expected. She knew it was only a matter of time. Just like she had an idea of what you’d be telling her through that voicemail.

She only hoped it was reason enough to break the much needed promise you’d made to her two weeks prior.

“I won’t be there when you get back. I promise.”

Now that she thought back to it, it sounded so… negative. Almost hostile.

It was hard to think you were as heartbroken as you looked. Feeling yourself emptying through the tears escaping your eyes after verbally signing away your right to ever see her again. The most amazing person you had the chance to know.

Or at least you thought you knew her. Because you surely never expected her to end things with something as cold as a phone call.

Then again, it wasn’t like she had much of a choice. It was one of the reasons that even pushed her to do it.

It wasn’t like she was happy to do it. It didn’t make it any easier, but she did feel relieved about not having you witness her struggle.

Yours though… If she didn’t see it either, she very much felt it.

She could still hear the crack in your voice when you promised, like it was giving her a spoiler of the future. Of how you’d eventually let yourself get swayed again and break it.

It would have been a spoiler if she hadn’t already known. She knew you too well to expect otherwise from you. You always broke them.

Both of you.

Missed dates and late nights at work lead to promises neither of you managed to uphold. Always making it up to each other with small, mundane affection. Flowers, gifts, and thoughful texts about how much you cared about the other, all with pure and loving intentions.

But that’s all it was.

Intentions. You intended on making it up to her for that missed lunch date. She intended on making it up to you for that ruined movie night.

Yet nothing ever got done.

A kiss, a sorry, and three words marked the end of a cycle, only to become the starting line to another.

You didn’t notice for a good couple of months. Enough to let it all sift through hands you thought had a strong enough grip on this relationship.

Your head was steady on your shoulders, chin up high and looking far down a bright future you planned together while still hopeful and naive. Head over heels for each other until the last minute, so much so you failed to notice your blinded hearts.

It was slow, but those empty promises stitched off parts of the patch you’d given each other’s hearts over time. As much as either of you hoped for the opposite, it only turned out to be a temporary fix.

The younger version of yourselves—they were excited and careful about it. You learned about each other, about what could hurt and what could heal. It was a long process, one you hoped would not only be as life changing as it felt, but a lifelong one as well.

Some would say you were foolish for that. Foolish and in love. A sight capable of making any witness both smile and throw up. Upon reflection, that wide range of reaction alone should have been enough to warn you of what you were now very much aware of.

Two of the most unstable emotions life can offer you : foolishness and young love, they don’t feel as pretty as they look.

And promises just weren’t enough to hold onto when faced with the inevitable fall from grace, as your relationship finally collided with reality.

#jeongyeon x reader #twice x reader #kpop x reader #jeongyeon #twice imagines #twice

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melodyofthevoid · 11 months

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❛ what? no witty remark? nothing clever to say? ❜

❛ i just wanted to say i’m sorry. ❜

with the robo blorbos hehe

(Hehe, of course of course)

Olli believed in two things above all else: being prepared, and keeping a cool appearance.

Of course one made the other possible. After all, acting as though you knew everything came much easier if you did actually know everything. Olli could afford to be aloof and snarky and distant because she’d planned for every eventuality. She’d honed her skills, she had backup plans upon backup plans, and she had Milo.

Well. They’d had Milo.

For the 44th time that cycle they’d disassembled and reassembled their pistol. Removing the charge-bolt battery, the excess charge heat-sink, the custom amplifier. Checking them over. Putting them back together again. Rinse and repeat. Cycle through the cameras to his hideaway and occasionally throw a knife at the printout of Harv. Or what remained of the printout.

Given their accuracy? Not much.

But what good did throwing knives do when their best friend for all intents and purposes didn’t fucking EXIST-

The mechanical reflex of reassembly paused midway, moving too fast not to cause some damage to the trigger mechanism. A jam might ruin her prized piece and that? Well that’d be the cap on a shitty series of events. So they eased the cartridge in, setting it down.

Olli stood up, walking away to recalibrate her joints and get her head on straight. All of this served no purpose, other than to let her mind wander back to the fresh horror and betrayal that brought her here in the first place.

He’d trusted Harv. His mentor, his teacher. Who’d paired them up with Milo in the first place and for what? To sell him out to Pricilla? To sell himself out- and-

And all of this for what? One half-decent pop-bot? Sure, she knew how to put up a fight but if Iliana had left? What changed? Not enough to warrant the crackdown the city faced and certainly not enough to justify the complete violation of Milo’s code.

All roads led to ill-advised actions and Olli’s sense of self-respect and preservation kept them from seeking out any revenge. But they also had no plans. No routes to righting the situation or settling the score. Killing Harv? Impossible, too many layers of security plus Milo. Getting through to Milo? Not a chance, with her level of self repair knowledge she’d probably break him. Caving in Illiana’s thick skull? Tempting but required them to cross the city and risk the wrath of Fin.

What remained then?

A whole lot of nothing, that’s what. Nothing, and a restless anxiety that Olli wanted gone. Anxiety was Milo’s thing, not theirs.

They missed him already.

Clattering from an upper window demanded Olli’s immediate attention, and they snatched the (fully assembled, as it should be) pistol from the table. Creeping towards the source of the noise. The milliseconds that they’d stepped away from their cameras something managed to get in.

Just their luck.

The signature coming off of the figure already rang alarm bells because this room took at least several feats of acrobatics to get to in the first place. Meaning whoever this was either had a death wish or wanted Olli. That, and no one else should know about this aside from- from Milo.

Who’d give up his location with no qualms. Because it was an order.

Shit.

Olli’s hands never shook, too new to accumulate any bugs that might interfere with the servos or corrosion to wear down their wires. But their courage wavered, which unsettled them enough that their hands nearly trembled.

Several knocks against one of the stray pipes rang out in quick succession, forming some sort of rhythm. A… song’s rhythm. The pauses lining up just right. Aligning with a song that Olli heard only once and only with a certain performer.

Mild fear turned to annoyance turned to a finger just over the trigger trying to find a reason not to press down. Their slight tick of amusement overshadowed by the fact that she bothered to show up here at all. After everything.

But Olli could be generous. They’d at least give her a head start before they pummeled her.

“Come on out princess. I won’t shoot you, but I’d appreciate if you stopped lurking.”

Out of the darkness, a pair of hands raised, followed by the rest of Illiana. Not looking any worse for wear. Hopefully that meant she took enough caution to not be followed, not that Olli cared to place any bets on that. As expected her landing from the upper pipes went off without a hitch, her wires not even tangling when she somersaulted to the ground.

Irritating in its own right.

“Were you followed?”

“No,” Illiana checked back over her shoulder, “I made sure. Would’ve gotten here sooner if I hadn’t but- I wanted to talk.”

Olli made a show of nodding and “considering” Illiana’s words. As if he weren’t melting from the inside. Coolant trying its damndest to perform. He put his hands on his hips, turning from the ground to her, and back again.

“Mhm.”

Wasting no more time, Olli rolled their shoulders. Flexing their hand a few times before walking up to Illiana, and winding up for the first blow. Her optics widened, not out of fear yet

“Wait- wait hold on-“

Metal connected with sapphire glass, the thin layer clacking but not quite shattering. Of course Illiana got the expensive stuff in her construction. It’d take nothing short of a bomb to leave a dent. Or several dozen shots.

Either way Olli didn’t do all that much damage. Which worked with her, she spared no feelings, especially not her own. There was more where that came from. Plenty more.

“I’d ask how you managed to find me,” Olli snarled, “but you’re here. So it doesn’t matter. ”

In the back of their mind, they made a note to abandon this hideout once they’d dealt with the popstar. Careful or no, the location’s compromise was almost certain. Which really sucked, they’d gotten quite comfortable here.

Too comfortable in retrospect.

Not that they didn’t already prepare a list of alternate locations, Olli more than made sure to do that cycles ago. Moving and hiding the evidence just took so long. In any case. More pressing matters took priority here. But it piled onto the list of pettier grievances.

“So, are you here to make me even more involved with your mess?”

Illiana’s wires fell like a curtain over her faceplate as she turned away for a nanosecond. Grimacing before facing Olli again. Olli barked out a laugh, throwing her hands up and spinning on her heel.

“What? No witty remark? No ‘Oh it’ll be fine trust me’? No ‘Come on you can believe me, the wanted criminal who’s dragged everyone else into her nonsense’?”

Illiana winced, but kept her back straight. Not quite proud, but not shrinking either.

“I wanted to say I’m sorry.”

“Well- wait what?”

“You’re right, I did drag Milo into all this. I- I thought this all would be easier. Prissy’s more desperate than I gave her credit for and… He’s been on the receiving end now. Twice.”

Olli examined Illiana again, closer. Scanning her body language. Every time they’d interacted prior, she’d exuded a near obnoxious amount of cheer. A battery made of optimism and showmanship. It even came through in her fighting, which for all of its flash did work. She knew how to move, when to move. Always with a smile.

Now that grin hid somewhere else. Her optics unwavering. Open.

There wasn’t a doubt in Olli’s mind that she practiced those words before this. The odd part was that he didn’t exactly mind. It at least meant she put some forethought into this.

“Alright. So why’d you come here? You got something other than an apology?”

“I think we can get Milo back.”

They froze. Thoughts stuttering to a halt before their fans clocked overtime.

There’d better be an explanation. Not blind “can-do”. Not some flimsy hope that things might improve because Olli didn’t work with might. She needed certainty, security, because only a handful of bots mattered enough for them to stick their neck out. And one of them just betrayed her.

“Explain.”

She needed to know.

“Vex managed to break some of the firewalls in the AEGIS database,” Illiana crossed her arms, “ We didn’t get everything, but we did get some of Dell’s logs and code. With that, they can reverse whatever they did to him. I know they can.”

Something dangerous sparked in Olli’s core. A grin peaking up at the corners of their mouth.

Not that they’d give Illiana her full trust just yet. She needed more information. To plan, obviously. Not for any other reason.

“And I assume you came here to tell me because…?”

“Because I can’t get him alone. I’d risk seriously injuring him, or myself. Right now, he’d try to destroy me. And he might even succeed, we both know that he’s more lethal than he lets on. WIth you, we’d have a better chance of catching him, getting him back to Vex, and- and getting your best friend back.”

Olli looked Illiana over one more time. Loathe as she was to admit it, Illiana did know how to handle herself, and clearly wanted to make things right. She had a plan, which meant more than knives against a printout and another reassembly. With Illiana’s start, Olli could steer the rest to smooth victory. As they always did.

They’d let their anger go. For now.

“Well, let’s get started then.”

#my writing #melody rambles #I see the other prompt I will get to it #gonna re reblog the prompts bc... idk #anyways #love Olli #she's struggling

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vampirequeen019 · 9 months

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Finally the last chapter of this story. Hope you like it.

Tags for this story: Light Angst, sad themes, self-destructive tendencies, depression, symptoms of depression, happy ending.

Songs used in this chapter: "Dirty Thoughts" by: Gracie Abrams ft. Nationhaven. And "Eclipse (All Yours)" by Metric.

Art used in this story by my dear friends, @ivii20 and @daseindigital.

Second Date, Second Chance.

Chapter 6.

A Joyful moment waited by everyone.

“Are you crazy, Kagome?! How could you accept to go on that date?!” What about Houjo? Ayame told her as she paced up and down Kagome’s dorm and Kagome watched her from her bed, sitting on it, and leaning against the wall.

“Of course I’m not crazy, Aya,” she began calmly. “You know everything I’ve been through this past year as well as I do,” her voice turned pleading. “But understand that I have to do this, please. I have a right to know why he didn’t show up for the date. Why hasn’t he contacted me in all this time?

Ayame stopped suddenly and walked over to Kagome’s bed. She sat on the edge of her bed watching her and took her hand. “Because I know, I’m telling you it’s not a good idea, Kags. What if what he tells you is not what you expected? If that makes you suffer again, I won’t be able to bear it.” A tear peeked out of her left eye.

Kagome squeezed her hand trying to comfort her friend. “I know there’s a chance of that happening, Aya, but I still have to go. I want and need to know everything. I promise to speak to your aunt as soon as I return from the date. Please Aya, understand me.” She told her, while some tears rolled down her cheeks.

Ayame took both of Kagome’s hands in hers and nodded. “He better tell you the whole truth or I swear I’ll kick his ass, even if he’s stronger than me, you hear?” She looked at Kagome and gave her a reassuring smile. While swearing to herself to beat Sesshomaru half to death if he hurt her best friend again.

~~~•~~~~•~~~•~~~~•~~~•~~~~

The sound of an incoming message notification snapped Kagome out of her thoughts. She sat on her bed and took the cell phone from her nightstand. She gave an annoyed sigh and checked the message, it was from Yuka, a classmate and friend of Houjo’s.

Yuka 😺:

<<<< How could you do this to Houjo?! What kind of person are you?! 🤬

[Received at 9:45 a.m.]

Kagome just sighed. Yuka was the last one to send her a message. All the other friends of her ex-fiancé had already called her and sent hate messages for breaking her engagement with him. And frankly, she was getting tired of it.

Ex fiancé. It was weird to refer to Houjo that way but that was who he was for her now. After all, he was the one who broke off his engagement with Kagome and not her, like all of his friends thought.

~~~•~~~~•~~~•~~~~•~~~•~~~~

When Kagome told Houjo about what happened with Sesshomaru, she thought that he would understand why she was doing all this. She apparently was wrong.

At first Houjo seemed to understand the situation, but when Kagome finished re-counting what happened and told him that he would go to that date, he was silent for several minutes and then he burst out and reminded her of everything she had suffered because of Sesshomaru. And he told her that she couldn’t go to her date.

“Excuse me, what? I think I didn’t hear you right. Could you repeat the last thing you said?” Kagome looked at him intently from across the table where they were sitting eating.

“You will not go. You can’t go and meet with him. Not after everything that happened.” Houjo told her in a very serious tone. He didn’t raise his voice but Kagome felt as if he had yelled at her.

“You are engaged to me and if you go, it would be the same as being unfaithful.” Kagome gaped at him. It was the first time Houjo had expressed himself like this.

She took a deep breath to calm down and told him. “Houjo, I just want to know what happened, close cycles if necessary. It’s not like anything is going to happen between us. My psychologist told me that it’s important for me to close cycles if I’m going to spend the rest of my life with you, and I think she’s right. So yes, I will go.” She took his hand trying to comfort him but he immediately took it away.

“If you insist on going on that damn date with him, you and I are done, do you understand? We’re done”. There was a note of finality to his voice.

Kagome looked surprised at how Houjo was acting. Was this the real him and she hadn’t realized it? A chill ran down her spine just thinking about her future with him if his personality was truly like that.

She took her purse and took out money to pay for her food portion. She got up and put it on the table with a loud bang. “So be it. You and I are done”. She walked with a sure step to the exit of the café and left.

~~~•~~~~•~~~•~~~~•~~~•~~~~

Just remembering it, she felt chills ran through her body. If that’s how he was when they were only engaged, what would it be like when they were married? Nope, no way would she allow it.

She finished brushing her teeth and brushed her hair. Humming a song while she changed her clothes to go to the market. She texted Ayame good morning and silenced her cell phone, but not before assuring Ayame that she would be fine.

~~~•~~~~•~~~•~~~~•~~~•~~~~

Hours later, Kagome was walking to the entrance of the restaurant. She was glad when she knew it wouldn’t be the same place as the one from the previous failed date. It was one less thing to worry about.

She entered the restaurant and approached the maître d’ station and was surprised by her familiar face. For a few moments she was transported back to the terrible failed event of last year. What if it happens again? What if Sesshomaru doesn’t show up again?

She took a deep breath trying to calm herself as she walked towards her. When she arrived with the maître d’, she told her, “I have a reservation for two people under the name of Sesshomaru Taisho.”

The maître d’ asked for her name to verify her reservation. Kagome clenched both hands on her wallet and braced herself in case the maître d’ told her there was no one waiting. The maître d’ smiled and told her that her party was waiting for her already, to which Kagome breathed a sigh of relief. She didn’t realize when she held her breath.

“One of our servers will escort you to your table,” the maître d’ told her, waving to one of the servers. “Please accompany the young lady to her table. She’ll be in the cherry blossoms private room.” The waiter nodded and asked Kagome to join him. “I hope you like our food. Enjoy your evening.”

Kagome thanked her and followed the waiter. Her heart was beating rapidly and she was nervous. Sesshomaru was here. This time he did show up to the date. When she got to the room where their dinner would be, Kagome took another deep breath. She had to calm down, she couldn’t go in and see Sesshomaru feeling like that. When she was ready, she motioned for the waiter to open the door and went inside after thanking him.

Sesshomaru was waiting for her, standing next to the table. He looked so elegant with what he was wearing. He was wearing a three-piece suit, all in black. Handsome and elegant. They were the two words Kagome used to describe Sesshomaru in her head.

She moved closer to him and extended a hand in greeting but Sesshomaru instead of giving her a shake in greeting, he brought her hand to his lips and kissed her knuckles.

Kagome blushed when Sesshomaru told her, “You look as beautiful as the last day I saw you.” In his voice was reflected, could it be? Could she called it, yearning?

Kagome felt her face burn. Her heart wouldn’t stop beating so fast that she thought it would crack her ribs and run out of her chest. But her hand was still raised in Sesshomaru’s, near his mouth.

“And you too”. She told him, giving him a small smile. What else could she say? Her mind went blank as she felt Sesshomaru’s lips kiss her skin.

~~~•~~~~•~~~•~~~~•~~~•~~~~

When Sesshomaru saw Kagome walk in, he had to rest a hand on the table to keep from falling down. Kagome looked so beautiful in that strapless black dress and that low neckline. God, he wanted to run his tongue between her breasts and run her tongue all over her cleavage. Calm down Sesshomaru, it’s still too early for that.

She wore her hair up and had a rhinestone choker on her neck. He wondered what material it was made of and if it would withstand him biting it off her neck. Control your thoughts Sesshomaru, it’s not time yet.

Just looking at her made him have M- rated thoughts. It’s just that all her was beautiful no matter what she was wearing.

When she took her hand in greeting, he felt that electric current again. He was even more determined, he would win Kagome’s heart no matter what. He would move heaven, sea and earth as long as Kagome accepted him. He would fight anyone to get her. If he had to kidnap her, he would. She was worth all that and more.

God, it felt so good to touch her skin with his lips, he would have wanted to kiss her mouth at that moment but he would settle for kissing her hand for now. If all went well he might have the chance to kiss her on the cheek or on her mouth if he stole a kiss from her.

As Kagome blushed, Sesshomaru felt his heart beating a mile a minute and when she smiled at him, he imagined for a moment that he was a puppy wagging his tail when his mistress gave it a little pat. He could almost feel himself rumbling.

He cleared his throat and indicated her that they could sit down to begin the evening. He pulled out Kagome’s chair so she could sit down. When she did, he pulled her closer to the table. Kagome thanked him and he sat in his chair.

The waiter in charge of them approached and offered them a glass of white wine to which they both nodded in response. He asked them if they wanted to order now or wait a little longer. They ordered at that moment and the waiter left to hand over their orders.

When the two were left alone, Sesshomaru thought about where he should start his explanation. He chose to tell her everything from the beginning.

He told her that he came from a military family. His grandfather had been a Colonel in the army and his father was a General Major in the army. And he himself, was a Master Sergeant in the army, under his father’s orders.

He told her what he was doing at that party, about his half brother and his sister who was the one who organized the party for his half brother before he went to the army. He told her that he had arrived in the city two days back after being absent since he was stationed at another military base in another state.

The waiter interrupted them when he opened the door and apologized for the delay. He put their food on the table and told them that if they needed anything else, to feel free to touch the little button on the wall and he would come immediately to serve them. He wished them bon appetite and he left.

When they were alone again, Sesshomaru suggested to Kagome to eat something before he continued with the story. Kagome nodded and the two began to eat. From time to time, Kagome would turn to see Sesshomaru but when he felt her gaze and turned to look at her, she would turn to her food and continue eating. Sometimes it was the other way around, and Sesshomaru was the one who turned to see her and when Kagome felt her gaze and turned to see him, he kept his gaze fixed on her.

“You are really beautiful Kagome.” Kagome blushed and thanked him. She took a sip from her wine and continued eating. When they were done, Sesshomaru continued with his story.

He told her how he received a call from his father on that Friday night after he sent her the last message. His father came for him by helicopter and took him to the military base. During the helicopter ride, his father informed him of the situation and when they arrived at the military base, his father took his cell phone because he couldn’t risk someone hacking into their cell phones and finding out about the mission

He told her everything he was allowed to say about the mission. He told her that several times he tried to get hold of a cell phone to talk to her, but they kept an eye on him so well that as soon as he had one in his possession, someone would block it and take it away, destroying it right then and there. He saw Kagome’s face change her expression as he explained.

~~~•~~~~•~~~•~~~~•~~~•~~~~

Hearing Sesshomaru’s explanation, Kagome felt a lot of anger but not towards him, but towards his father. If he’d just given Sesshomaru a few minutes to call her, she wouldn’t have suffered everything she’d suffered over the past year. Neither she would have been with another man.

She would have waited for him as long as it took. And to think that she suffered so much because of just one person. But as the saying goes, if wishes were horses, so she would have to accept the fact that Sesshomaru was in the military if she wanted to be with him.

Sesshomaru told her that he had a very difficult time being apart from her that year, and without him being able to contact her and explain what was happening. He felt so worthless not being able to do anything to reassure her that he hadn’t forgotten her and that he still thought of her every day.

“God”. He ran a hand through her hair and said. “Kagome, I swear I never stopped thinking about you, not a single day went by that I didn’t think about you. On many occasions I asked my father to allow me to talk to you, that I wanted to assure you that I was fine and that I did not abandon you, but my father denied me permission to call you.”

“It’s not his fault, because the mission required it. Although many times I blamed him.” He breathed out in frustration. “If only I had talked to you, you wouldn’t be engaged to another man right now. You would not be about to marry someone else and right now you would be in my arms.” His voice cracked at the end, as if he was on the verge of crying.

“I’m not engaged”. She told him, but apparently Sesshomaru didn’t hear her because he kept talking. When he finally processed what she told him, he looked at her suddenly. “Wait, what?”

Sesshomaru’s shocked face made Kagome laugh a little. “That I am no longer engaged. I am free to do and be with whoever I want.”

Kagome watched as Sesshomaru pinched his arm and the face he made. “I am not dreaming. You’re really not engaged to him anymore.”

She shook her head at the same time she said, “nope. Not anymore. I broke off my engagement with him just yesterday. We are no longer together.”

She barely finished saying that when Sesshomaru got up and approached her, taking her by her hands, he helped her stand up and hugged her. His hug felt so good, it was better than she remembered. She rested her head on his chest and closed her eyes enjoying her closeness.

God, he smelled so good that she wanted to know if his whole body smelled like that or it was just near her nose. Kagome pulled back a little to look at Sesshomaru, and he in turn looked down at her. They lost themselves in each other’s gazes for a few moments until Sesshomaru leaned in a little closer to kiss her.

At first it was a slow kiss and a little shy, but the more they kissed, the more Kagome wanted. She opened her mouth to deepen the kiss and she felt Sesshomaru insert his tongue into hers to taste her better. That kiss turned wild, they fought to dominate the other and in the end Sesshomaru emerged victorious. He moved her until they were leaning against the wall.

Kagome gladly allowed herself to be won. Sesshomaru kissed so well. His hands ran over her waist and back. Once her fingers brushed against the bottom of her breasts, and Kagome gasped in surprise, wanting him to touch her even more.

How will his hands feel on my naked body? How will his tongue feel when he penetrates me with it? When he licks my clit? Oh my God, Kagome! What things are you thinking? She scolded herself for thinking that way. But she couldn’t help but think like that when Sesshomaru caressed her and kissed her like that.

Their kiss seemed endless and she was fine with it. She knew that she needed to breathe but at that moment she thought, who needs to breathe? That is overrated. She ran her hands behind his neck and continued to kiss him.

~~~•~~~~•~~~•~~~~•~~~•~~~~

Sesshomaru stopped the kiss for a moment and when he did, they both took a quick breath and kissed again, only this time, their kiss was wilder and hungrier. His manhood was growing and it was getting harder. Their hands went as far as they could. One of his hands ran down Kagome’s leg where the slit of her dress was. Her skin was so silky that he felt his manhood harden even more and she wanted Kagome to feel it too.

So he lifted her leg that he was stroking and wrapped it around his waist, pulling Kagome closer to him, so that she could feel what she was doing to him.

~~~•~~~~•~~~•~~~~•~~~•~~~~

Kagome gasped in surprise, accompanied by a moan as Sesshomaru pulled her closer to his manhood. Heavens, he was so big she couldn’t help but imagine what it would feel like to have him inside her.

Kagome did her best to feel closer to Sesshomaru. The difference in their height was proving that going through with it would be difficult. Her other leg barely touched the ground and her heels didn’t help much. Though she was sure Sesshomaru could easily find a way for them to keep doing it. She was not going to deny it, she wanted him so much at that moment, that if he asked her, she would let him make love to her right then and there.

Sesshomaru lowered her leg to the ground again and focused on kissing her. Kagome felt Sesshomaru kiss her behind her ear and he lightly stopped on her neck. He tugged on her choker with what she assumed were his teeth, as if wanting to break it, but seeing that it didn’t budge, his mouth lowered to her shoulder, getting closer and closer to her chest. Kisses, small bites, and licks made their way on Kagome’s upper body. When she felt Sesshomaru reach the bottom of her cleavage, she held her breath, waiting for him to push the neckline of her dress out of the way and to the side of her so he could kiss her breasts.

~~~•~~~~•~~~•~~~~•~~~•~~~~

They completely forgot that they were in a public place, but the waiter reminded them when he walked in and saw them, one might say, busy with each other.

He cleared his throat and that alerted them. They both separated quickly, their breaths still agitated by what they were doing just seconds before.

They both apologized with their faces flushed, not because of what they did because they didn’t feel they did something wrong, but because they were caught red-handed.

They thanked the waiter and left the place holding hands and chuckling, as if they were keeping some secret and only they knew.

~~~•~~~~•~~~•~~~~•~~~•~~~~

A year later on the WEXA radio station, a host of the most famous program of the moment was successfully celebrating his second year of winning the award for the most listened to program on primetime radio.

A few small taps on the glass of the cabin alerted him to the entrance of his boss.

“You have to read this. It is an email and it is addressed to the entire production team of our program, ”he told him while waving a sheet of paper with something written on it in his right hand. A huge smile was drawn on his face.

Alex Santiago took the sheet of paper and began to read the email. As he read, a smile spread across his face, growing bigger the more he read.

When he had finished reading it he began to laugh. “Oh my God! We have to read it on the show. The radio listeners will want to know the good news.”

The producer agreed and left him to prepare for the show.

Ten minutes later the program started.

*You are tuning in to WEXA. The most popular music station of the moment.*

*And this is your program, “The Rhythm of Music”. A program specially made for people who like music regardless of its genre*.

*I am your radio host Alex Santiago and today we have two very good news for you that I am sure will be to your entire liking.*

*First news: as you know, we are celebrating another anniversary of the radio station and just yesterday we received the award for “The most listened to program” on primetime radio for two years in a row. Thank you to all of our radio listeners for making this possible.*

*And the second good news which I’m sure many of you have been waiting for a long time. And not only you, but also all of us in the production team of the program.*

*Half an hour ago we received an email from one of our radio listeners and we want to share it with all of you.*

*”Dear members of the production of the program “The Rhythm of Music”, you may not remember us but we do remember you. Because thanks to you my fiancé and I were able to meet again and be happy.”*

*”A year and a month ago, but who counts, right?”* Reading this, Alex laughs a little because he remembered very well where he had heard that.

*”You accepted a call from a guy and helped him ask a girl, which he had left waiting for him in what would be their first date a year before last, and offered their help to talk to her and explain why he didn’t show up to their date.”*

*”Well, let me tell you that that guy and that girl are us and thanks to your help is that we are now together. We are engaged and will be getting married in six months and the entire production team is invited to the wedding as a thank you for your help.”*

*”Thank you again for what you did for us. We will be grateful to you for a lifetime. Sincerely, Kagome Higurashi and Sesshomaru Taisho.”*

*There you have it, listening friends. The couple that all of you and we, wanted to know about sent us this email. Sesshomaru and Kagome, if you are listening to us right now, we want to say, congratulations on your engagement and your upcoming wedding. And thank you for making us part of this beautiful story. We will be delighted to attend your wedding. Feel free to send us your wedding invitation whenever you like.*

*And now, some messages from our sponsors and upon return, more music with the song “Dirty Thoughts” by Gracie Adams featuring Nationhaven and “Eclipse (All Yours)” by Metric.*

~~~•~~~~•~~~•~~~~•~~~•~~~~

The End.

Link to the previous chapter:

#sesskag #sesshome #fic #sesskag fandom #SessKag fic #sesshome fandom #fanfic #sesshome fic #sessxkag #sesshomaru x kagome #sesshomaru kagome #Second Date Second Chance fanfic

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cebwrites · 1 year

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what crawls beneath - dysphoria (Penguin, Zoro)

sorry to come back with such a heavy note lovelies, the rough times aren’t over yet and ya boi needs to string these icky feelings into something lest i explode- i can’t promise i’ll return with more super soon, but i’ll try to make the next one not as sads >< HUGE content warning to all those this may apply to under the cut - there will be mentions of: dysphoria, misgendering, misogyny, menses blood and the (specifically transmasc) discomfort of being subjected to a cycle every month

if these are things you feel may be upsetting to you feel free to skip this one!! i’ve got loads of other prompts in my masterlist that are way more light-hearted and fun, please take care of yourselves first and foremost y’all (っ´ω`)ﾉ(╥ω╥)

no reader, transmasc Penguin and Zoro (separate) word count: 1.2k

Penguin

Penguin is the oldest out of their little ragtag team from the North Blue - only a year ahead of Shachi when it was just the two of them, but older nonetheless. There was a certain expectation that came along with that title, to be a protector, a provider, how the people around him were taught to be men.

Once Law and Bepo came along, his responsibilities only mounted. That would change as Law’s crew gained more members and duties were split more evenly, but Penguin would always be the one that everyone could count on. One of the vital gears keeping his captain’s ship afloat.

So it was only more salt in the wound that once every month, at least in the beginning, he was reduced to shaking like a leaf in some quiet corner of the Tang whenever his cycle chose to rear it’s foul, dripping head.

Pain was never much of an issue for Penguin; all things considered, he thinks his cramps err on the mild side. It was the blood that he couldn’t stand.

Blood that stained his sheets at the tender age of eleven that made his dad awkwardly stand in the doorway, trying to hide discomfort, while his mother cheerfully reassured him that this was a natural part of growing up and how she was so happy that she’d be able to do more mother-daughter things with him; blood that got Penguin yelled at by Shachi’s wicked aunt and uncle for soiling what clothes they were ‘charitable’ enough to lend these disheveled kids in exchange for hard, back-breaking labor. He’d be forced to wash the stains out by hand afterwards.

Penguin was cursed with the misfortune of torturous 7 day cycle and a heavy flow throughout. Part of him resented the choice for the crews’ uniform to be all white but they had a strong enough cleaning agent to rid their clothes of regular blood stains, so Penguin didn’t complain. Still, the crimson would continue to haunt him.

He’s a pirate god damn it and even before this, Penguin had committed the level of violence you’d expect from someone engaging in criminal activity with Shachi under threat from the latter’s aunt and uncle. No blood from those arguably nastier acts had ever bothered him like this, though.

None of the thugs he’d left to frostbite could ever upset Penguin as much, could make him feel as dirty as sitting alone in the bathroom, avoiding as much eye contact as possible with the mirror, also trying not to look at the red between his legs as he attempted to change out of his old pad into a new one as quietly as possible.

The rational part of his brain knows that none of this makes him any less of a man, his captain’s voice tells him loud and clear, along with Shachi’s reassurance and Bepo’s kind offers of physical comfort - but his head always gets like this when the blood moon rolls around - clouds all their good intentions with nonsense he’d promised to toss long ago and leaves him a shell by the end of the week; and exactly why Penguin’s all the more grateful for the space, patience and understanding his crew affords him until he’s willing to let them in again.

Zoro

Zoro, for a lack of a better term, has always flown by the seat of his pants. He’s never cared for semantics and as far as he’s concerned - doesn’t have the time. Always looking for that next step, the next hurdle that would bring him closer to becoming The Best.

He vividly remembers the shades of red that danced across his vision from Kuina’s words that day.

“Pretty soon you’ll be stronger than me...”

Lies, they were. All of those bitter, angry words Kuina parroted through tears because she’d heard them innumerable times before. They weren’t true! Kuina was brave, she was smart, she was collected, she was everything Zoro wanted to be and yet - if Kuina of all people would never be enough in the eyes of these people, her own father and his master, what exactly did that make Zoro?

He trained all throughout the night, infuriated by Kuina’s treatment, yet another loss at her hands, and what the implications meant for him but having none of the words to articulate his thoughts so he did what he could by slashing bamboo against wood until he lost sensation in his tiny, ten year old hands.

Until the numbness spread across his entire body when the news of Kuina’s death reached him, her cruel fate seemingly devised by a vindictive hand rang in his ears as Zoro belligerently screamed about their promise at her wake, drawing eyes and mouths directly to him, away from her death, so abrupt in the face of all her dreams, her aspirations, it was almost laughable how unfair, indifferent fate could be if it didn’t fill him with an infernal rage.

Shamelessly, Zoro begged Koushiro for Kuina’s sword, promising to fulfill both of their dreams in one fell swoop. Something lurched deep in his stomach at how easily the old man gave it up - his daughter’s beloved blade. That feeling of unease followed him until Zoro left the island, hoping to leave the bits of his unsightly past and only carry what was needed, her spirit and their goal, to the future.

Of course, that was easier said than done.

Through every step of the way, it felt like his body was betraying him and Zoro had no recourse. Zoro was a later bloomer than most, so though it was easy enough to coast by living in the dojo with nothing more than simple binding, things got more and more difficult with the changes puberty brought as the date that he’d set out to sea drew closer.

Zoro never told his peers nor Koushiro anything, given the circumstances. Plus, he’d be lying if Zoro said that he didn’t harbor at least a bit of resentment for how the old man and the village treated his late daughter in life and death, disrespecting her memory even till the end. So they’d remain in the dark about him, even with all the fond memories Zoro had of Shimotsuki village, none of them ever saw Kuina for her and he doubted that if the truth came out they’d ever see him for him, either.

Sometimes when he’s alone and his thoughts quiet down, Zoro wonders if Kuina had enough time, would she come to the same conclusions that he had about his gender, his identity, who he wanted to be in spite of similar the suffocating boxes of ‘womanhood’ they were both born into. These thoughts only ever last for a moment before Zoro shakes his head, he prays, puts out an offering to any nearby altars or makes one if none are available - an apology for speculating about the deceased, but most importantly his friend.

Nothing like that mattered anymore.

Through hell, high water, and any two-bit god that dared stand in his way, Zoro would carve out what it meant to be a man - the World’s Greatest Swordsman - on his own terms.

#cebwrites #one piece #one piece imagine #roronoa zoro #op zoro #zoro #one piece zoro #zoro one piece #trans zoro #op penguin #one piece penguin #penguin one piece #trans penguin #ftm dysphoria #tldr #penguin has it rough but takes solace in the people he's chosen around him #and zoro learns that the people he grew up with weren't shit but he's making waves on his own now

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astroyongie · 2 years

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Le Sserafim Reading - July Edition

Note: Please remember to take my words with a grain of salt. And have fun !

Chaewon

Chaewon isn’t in a relationship since April when she broken up with her ex partner. At the moment her love life isn’t very active, she is more focused on her work which was the primer reason she left her ex partner.

There’s new things, I see them working for their new comeback. She has put a lot of efforts into it and she doesn’t rely on the opinions of others despite receiving a lot of criticism inside the company. There’s a lot of external pressure when it comes to her work, but she tries to be patient even if sometimes she can’t help but fight and have arguments with her coworkers

Physical Health: She is overall okay, only a few headaches Mental Health: She feels trapped in her current situation, she has negative thoughts, pain that she needs to forgive to move on

Sakura

Okay so please take this with a grain of salt just like any of my readings. Her love situation is complicated, because she got herself involved with someone that was already on a fixed relationship. There’s quite a few age gape between them, the partner of the person she has been with recently broke up with their partner because of their relationship

I see a lot of good things for sakura, she will probably have some type of solo work (maybe advertising, brand, some type of solo schedule/work). Things are actually going very well for her in terms of career

Physical Health: She has been currently healing since she had som health issues concerning her blood circulation, womb and stomach in general. Mental Health: She has been feeling very exhausted lately, she thinks a lot about all the things she had to do to be where she is now

Yunjin

Yunjin isn’t in any kind of relationship. At the moment she is just enjoying her life, going around with however she wants, she is very close to her friends and has close relationships with them. She speaks with someone who currently has brown hair. However I also see that her current life is stuck in a cycle due to her current bad karma

Despite her career being in good feet, she Is scared of something concerning her work. She doubts and fears the public, about what they could be talking about her. She takes her work seriously but there’s a lot of anxiety concerning her future

Physical Health: Some headaches and also she has been dealing with hormonal issues Mental Health: She feels a lot of regret and guilt

Kazuha

Okay so pretty much like Chaewon she had someone in her life before she debuted, but because of her contract and of her manager and company, she had to break up with this person. It still today hurts her much, she still has feelings for them and she would have wished that it wouldn’t have to be like this

Good fortune coming to her career, she will be able to express herself and her creativity in a way. Kazuha is very excited to this new comeback and she wants to work hard

Physical Health: she is okay Mental Health: She feels very agitated, needs to work on her self esteem. Kazuha also has some very unhealthy lifestyle (maybe an addiction to some sort ?) she is trying to fight that on.

Garam

Currently she is in a sort of weird relationship with someone, that is covering her up and protecting her. I didn’t get much info about them but their relationship has been going since December 2021. I also see a lot of people that have bad intentions toward her, a lot of revenge going on

When it comes to her career it’s clear that she is in a very very bad situation, and my spread keeps conforming it. However I see someone (female) very influential in Hybe that has some type of relationship with Garam, that is trying to solve this situation for her. They might talk about the subject soon

Physical Health: She has thyroid issues, also pains in her neck and she probably strained her vocal cords Mental Health: She is doing fine

Eunchae

I had a hard time figuring what was going on in her love life, Eunchae is simply talking with someone via text/social media. She has been falling in Love with this person, she keeps it secret since there’s a reason she doesn’t want to meet them yet.

Thanks to her sponsorship she will be able to develop her career and I see good opportunities for her in the future. She is actually very happy with the situation that her group is at the moment, she wouldn’t want it to change. Good fortune for her career

Physical Health: She has some troubles with her blood pressure, her arteries and overall heart. Her body feels old to her Mental Health: She is very sensitive at the moment, she reflects a lot about her past and she wants to be alone

#Le Sserafim #Le Sserafim astrology #Le Sserafim reading #Le Sserafim tarot #Le Sserafim imagines #Le Sserafim headcanons #Le Sserafim scenarios #Le Sserafim reactions

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honeyflies05 · 1 year

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ITS TIME FOR MY 6x13 THOUGHTS BUCKLE UP PEOPLE!!

WE SURVIVED

WE DID IT!!!

that looks fun wtf

i wanna join that cycling class

I am char char is me

what is gonna happen with the water bottle

yo he good?

apparently not

if my thighs poison me just let me die

WHY IS BUCK BACK TO WORK??? LET MY BOY REST!!!!

Jesus they’re all goin💀

“did he just do math?? in his head??” CHIM-

SCREAMING

ANGELA BASSET WOOOOOOOOO

DAMN SHE RAN CROSS COUNTRY?? makes sense

denny missed the bus💀💀

denny and chim connection?? didn’t know I needed it

CHRIS ASKING HIM MATH WUESTIONS DJCIDHSHW I CALLED IT

BUCKS HANDS WITH THE POWER OF ELECTRICITY ANFJCUSBA

ESP DIFUDHSHSHAHAHA

buck and chris relationship >>

that IS a classic origin story

“HE COULD GIVE ME THE ANSWERS TO MY MATH HOMEWORK” THATS LJTERALLY ON MY BINGO CARD AKFICHDHS

MADDY BACK TO WORK MADDY BACK TO WORK MADDY BACK TO WORK!!!!!

that looks like a pioneer woman dish🤨

poor maddy💀💀

okay we’re back

I DO THIS WITH MY PARENTS ALL THE TIME AKDICHSA

…that house is green

WHO WAS IN THEIR HOUSE????

“you and law enforcement” NSIDHDHSHA

BUCK HAVING A CROWD AROUND HIM AND GETTING MONEY FOR HIS MATH DJCIDUDBWNWJEUW

HIM COUNTING THE MONEY SKFUDJDISBWA I CANT

she’s gonna have an asthma attack aint she

i too want a haircut without my mom’s permission

he seems like a creep💀

i don’t want him to do my hair

NOW GIRL-

WHY WOULD YOU THROW A BLOWTORCH

ALLERGIC TO WATER???

JESUS THE SCISSORS

the dead nebulizer stare AKDJFJDJS

WHERES DENNY

DENNY

…husband???

OH DENNY’S DAD

I GOT A MED EXPRESS AD DURINF THE BREAK ANDIHFHS

denny’s gonna get his ass BEAT

no Karen’s right

no bc see now I’m torn

athena going full police is so,,,,

they’re gonna station someone outside hUH

BUDDIE BUDDIE BUDDIE BUDDIE

RED AND BLUE COLOR THEORY

I’ve seen this part before

why does Eddie walk in here like he does this every Saturday night??💀

THREE MINUTES AND SEVENTEEN SECONDS!!!!!!!

I’m gonna be honest how tf do you play poker

MEHTA IS TRYING SO HARD SKFUUDS

HES GONNA GET CALLED OUT

“maths not his thing” YEAH! ITS NOT!

EDDIE LOOKS CONCERNED

“imagine that” SHE IS SO,,

PLAYBOY BUCKLEY!!!!!

EDDIE IS ONLY ARM CANDY!!!!!!!!!!

BUCK IS GONNA WIPE THEM OUT OH MY GODDDD

WORK WORK WORK WORK WORK

HE JUST LOOKS TO EDDIE

STEAKS???? S T E A K S ? ?

she noticed.

oh so my guy was FR HURT??

no fr why didn’t his dad come to them?? HES THE ADULT.

okay can we agree the looks eddie was giving buck we’re NOT straight

OMG HENS MOM?????

i want denny’s mushroom shirt #imgay

hen’s mom being the mediator and voice of reason is so,,, ♥️💜♥️💜💗💜💕💜

denny had good intentions but also he’s like 12 so

what’s she got stuck up her asshole.

A VIBRATOR??

BUCK AND EDDIE QUESTIONING HIM??

HER BLADDER???

his math ain’t helping💀💀💀

EDDIE YELLING AT HIM FOR THINKING AB HIS PAST RELATIONSHIPS THAGS HOW IM TAKING KT

hen knows how much that must hurt

NOTHING PREPARED ME FOR THAT CALL

buck was DEF on the phone with that girl he fucked in the firetruck

hen and chim bestieism

MADDIE WHY WOULD YOU INVITE HER IN

oh she SNEAKY

ATHENA!!!!!!

oh she wants a LETTER

WHY SHE TAKIN ALL THEIR MAIL????

THENA!!!!💜💜

okay but WHY does she want the mail

coupons💀💀💀

woooohoooo back to prison!!

buck would DEF use jeeyun for money skdichdhsha

my mom says aisha and hen’s mom’s actress are biologically related

hen’s mom is speaking truths with letting denny see his dad BUT telling his moms he’s doing it too and letting them regulate it like ADULTS

“like I got hit by a car” oh so he GOT JOKES???

YOURE AN ADULT??? YOU SHOULDVE SAID SOMETHING.

them being ADULTS and creating ground rules!!!!!

Karen and hen being amazing mothers once again god they stay winning

CHRIS AND BUCK!!!

chris is his sous chef!!!

America not using the metric system has its downfalls once again

“you know what a porterhouse is???”

“Buck.. I’m from texas” THAT HAD THE SAME ENUNCIATION AS “buck you don’t even have a couch!”

I LOVE ANGELA BASSET

that’s the same room Buck was in😭😭😭

henren fans were FED tonight (me)

ARE WE GONNA SEE BUCK FIGHT HIS WAY THROUGH A CROWD BECAUSE IM READY

i can’t wait until I leave for college and my roommate has to deal with me and my 911 brain

#911 on fox #911 fox #evan buck buckely #eddie diaz #evan buckley #911onfox #honey thinks #this episode was so fanfic coded #I’m still trying to figure out the logistics with that woman and the vibrator… just #ow #like how #I’m #yeah

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timeandspacenovelist · 2 years

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Mirrored Confession

Rating: G Chapters: 1

Summary: Finding herself alone in the locker room after the six woman tag match, Rhea engages in a conversation that she needed to have, but not with who she expected.

Read this story on another platform: Archive of Our Own

She tossed her towel into her locker, already half changed into her street clothes. She sighed deeply as she watched some of the bruises she got from the match. She knew it was going to sting tomorrow for sure. Even so, it’s the life she chose. She knew that as well. She’d liked to have gotten the win, but partners are never as good as she’d like. Well, except Becky. Becky was good. She came up to the mirror and watched herself in it with a smirk. There was an arrogance in her that wasn’t there before. She looked good, and she knew it. She opened the pipe at the sink and began collecting some water to slick back her hair to go out, but as she did, a voice could be heard.

“You don’t regret it, do you?”

Rhea stepped back in shock, looking around in confusion. Surely, she was hearing things. She went back to collecting water to slick back her hair and heard the voice again.

“Not even after how we felt.”

This got her to shoot her head up and look forward, and then she saw it. It was herself in the mirror, but she was definitely not doing the same things she was doing right now. In fact, she had her arms folded, looking quite disappointed.

“Must have taken a harder hit from Asuka than I thought. I’m seeing and hearing things.”

So she washed her face a bit and felt content that that would fix it. She looked up again, only to find the Rhea in the mirror still there, still looking disapprovingly. So, she indulged her weird brain. She was the last one here anyway, so it’s not like anyone would hear her rambling to herself, literally.

“Do I regret what?….” Rhea questioned, folding her arms.

“Turning our backs on her.” The mirror Rhea countered.

Rhea tried to hide it, but she swallowed hard when she heard the accusation, stubbornly trying to avoid it.

“On who?”

“The woman we loved.”

“Don’t you dare say that..” Rhea said, as her nostrils flared and she glared at her reflection.

The words made a dent in her armour. She couldn’t hide that. She couldn’t deny it, but she wasn’t about to give her mirror self the satisfaction. Her stubbornness was rising.

“But do you deny it’s true?” Mirror Rhea asked her.

“She was holding us back.”

“But is it true?” she countered again.

Rhea paced back and forth, running her hands through her hair while the Rhea in the mirror was the picture of calmness. She knew the answer. She was just waiting for her other self to admit it to her.

“Well… did we?”

“Of course we loved her!” Rhea finally shouted.

She stood there glaring at the mirror for a few seconds, breathing heavily before calming down and placing her hands on the counter, looking down into the sink. It was the first time she admitted that to anyone, even herself. There was a relief there that she hadn’t ever really felt before, and it took a lot out of her.

“Of course we loved her…” she repeated, this time softer and forlornly.

“Then why the attack?”

This time, it was the Rhea outside the mirror who had the chance to hit back, although it wasn’t at the level she’d wanted to.

“You know why…” Rhea said, with a lower timbre, still looking down into the sink.

Mirror Rhea stood quiet for a few seconds, not knowing what to say, but it wouldn’t be for long.

“We were supposed to be past that.”

“Yeah, but we weren’t. Were we?” she said, with a rise in her voice, looking up at her mirror self with a pained expression.

“Nikki was the one who was supposed to end the cycle. She was the one who we could trust and believe in. It was supposed to be a clean break. You and I both know we did not come here to be tag champs alone.” She continued.

“No, no, we didn’t.” There was no lying about that.

“We didn’t ask for anything complicated. Just a parting of the ways.” Rhea said as she paced around as before, but with less intent this time, “But she didn’t do that, did she?…”

Mirror Rhea sighed dejectedly. She was right again. But she had her own trump card, something she knew her other self could not reject or say she was lying about.

“No. But Liv was different. We felt comfortable with her. We got each other, we understood each other. There was just something that we’d never felt before. The ease at which we’d be with her compared to others. You remember how hurt we were after Shayna and Nattie beat us up and how, even when she was hurt, she still took care of us that night?”

“Tucked us in and kissed us on the forehead, too.” Rhea said, blushing slightly with a smile, which got her mirror self to do the same. But she sighed and the pained expression returned.

“But it was too much of a risk. We had no idea what could happen.”

“Why do you think she’d ever hurt us?”

Rhea darkly laughed at the question.

“We thought the same about Raquel too, and Candice. Got some scars from them to show that we were wrong.”

“But we fixed it with them.”

“Only after all the hurt had already happened…. Turning on Liv solved a problem that we already knew, deep down, that we had. We can’t fix ourself to anyone. We’ve never been able to. That’s what our life is. Not because we don’t want to, but because if we do, we know, sooner or later, it’ll hurt.”

Mirror Rhea was speechless, not able to look at her real-life counterpart anymore, who turned and continued getting ready to leave. There was nothing more she could say. She could already feel herself welling up because of it. So just getting dressed was what she could do to distract herself. Once she had finished and gotten her bag, the mirror Rhea spoke up one last time.

“…. You know we still love her.”

Rhea stopped at the door and turned back to her mirror self.

“We do, which makes doing it one of the hardest decisions of our life, and it hurts every day not having her by our side. But…it’d hurt more if it was because she had made the same choice I did after that match.”

And with that, she exited the room, as the Rhea in the mirror faded away, leaving her with her own thoughts, as tears formed in her eyes. There was so much pain, but she knew one day it’d be worth it. She just hoped by that point, Liv would have understood why she did what she did and forgiven her.

#liv x rhea #rhea x liv #liv for brutality #rhea ripley #liv morgan #wwe fanfiction #ao3 #archive of our own

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subukunojess · 1 year

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SABA Dreamer AU: Scarlet and Her Younger Days

Time once again for posting at Midnight so I don’t lose my idea or sanity, so here we go. I just thought about my Sackboy Dreamer AU with 4 Players and went down a rabbit hole with some of the unused lines and DLC regarding Scarlet’s time as a Knitted Knight. From the cutscenes and the few fan creations I find online, there’s the fanon headcannon that Scarlet knew and fought Vex when she was younger. I decided to take it a step further. More under the cut:

For my version of Scarlet, she did earn being a Knitted Knight on her own and had her best friend plush knight that brought her luck, but I believe when she got older, she did join a group of other Knitted Knights and formed friendships with them as well.

Because I like parallels and angst, the three knitted knights that were Scarlet’s close friends parallel Sackboy’s Dreamling friends.

I do not have ideas yet on two of the knights, but I do have ideas for Faith’s parallel, a sackboy named Pique (He/They).

Pique starts off as the quiet, kind, and compassionate artistic sackling who also dabbles in scientific experiments. He loves telling stories and singing songs to the sackfolk.

He is also childhood friends with Scarlet and they would play Knitted Knight games with her plush and his Vex plush.

One day (like a month or two before Vex is prophesized to come back to Craftworld), Pique gets an idea to break the Vex cycle. He believes that everyone deserves a second chance (even Vex) and that nightmares are essential. He feels sorry for Vex and wants to effectively prove to him that dreams and nightmares could coexist without terrorizing one another. Pique wants to do experiments with Uproar and Dreamer Orbs to see if there’s potential to his plan.

Scarlet is wary like Pique has good intentions, but she believes it’s more complicated than that. Then again, she also feels a little bad about Vex, so she reluctantly supports her friend.

Just like most horror/science fiction stories, Pique experiments on himself so that his body and stitching are laced with Uproar. At first, everything is fine. Pique uses Uproar on quests and to save people, becoming a popular knight.

However, there is a slow corruption/transformation as he progresses. It starts out small like a little outburst or getting an inch taller or a little teasing. But then it evolves into arguments and getting carried away into battle. One time, Scarlet and the other Knitted Knights had to help Pique when he outgrew his home and got stuck.

While this is happening, Vex gets closer to resurfacing and he gets wind of one of the Knitted Knights becoming Vexed which he wants to use it to his advantage.

I read on the wiki that there are lines from the Knitted Knight trials that when Vex was in Loom in the early years, he was trying to steal all the stories. Didn’t find the voice line yet, but that helped me a bit.

So Vex somehow approaches Pique in his dreams or alone and manipulates them to help him steal the stories of Loom, claiming that the storytellers were hiding something.

In the middle of the night, Pique transforms into a being like Vex and pulls a Pied Piper with his singing, kidnapping the Storyteller Sacklings. I believe Pique’s vexed form is a dark King Knight motif.

Scarlet and the two Knitted Knights are on the scene. They are surprised about Pique. Vex makes Pique attack their friends. Angst angst angst. The rest is like one epic battle over another and they defeat Vex but while Vex is fading away, he takes Pique down with him and takes out Scarlet’s eye.

Present day, Scarlet feels guilty and has kept Pique’s Vex plush with her own. When she finds out about Faith’s encounter with Vex, she is internally freaking out and tries to keep an eye on the situation while trying not to alarm Sackboy.

One last thought, but I have the idea that Pique is in the Uproar secretly helping Faith out while basically getting revenge on Vex/redeeming himself from his mistakes.

And that’s what I have so far.

#sackboy a big adventure #sackling #Scarlet #SABA #saba scarlet #Vex #Knitted Knight #Dreamer AU #OC: Pique #AU notes #idea #it's the tragedy and transformation for me #plus the size difference and g/t

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jackie-daniels · 1 year

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basics

[olivia cooke, f, she/her] ever heard about [jacqueline "whiskey" daniels]? Out here on the road, they have a reputation of being [+courageous, +resourceful] but also [-standoffish, -untrustworthy], no wonder they’re called [the runaway]. According to local legend, they’re [nineteen] and when they pull up to camp not a soul can mistake the sound of [please please please let me get what i want by the smiths] following them. Some say they carry [a hand-me-down walkman, a tattered journal, and a rusty locket] and have been traveling with [the militants].

tldr biography (tw: child abuse)

on the road, whiskey is known as just whiskey. before that, she was jacqueline lucy daniels, named after her late father jack daniels and nicknamed “whiskey” after him as well. despite never having met her father due to his untimely death in vietnam, he’s the only man whiskey has truly ever loved. her mother, annie, married twice after jack. once to warren johnson, who gifted her with a second baby girl named montana, and then again to dale smith after warren passed in a mining accident.

annie’s will to live was dependent on whether or not she had a man, so despite dale being the bottom of the barrel when it came to husbands—he was better than nothing. dale started abusing jackie when she was only ten years old. afraid of the consequences, jackie took every violation of her body in silence. she never told a soul...until she realized that her sister was being abused too. when she and montana came clean to their mama, she immediately left dale. but he cried and hurt himself and begged for her back until eventually, she gave in. and then things were okay for a bit...and then they’d get bad again. the cycle was never ending and annie did nothing to stop it. on the contrary, she blamed her girls for triggering dale to do what he did.

montana ran away first when she was just fourteen. jackie followed suit shortly after at age seventeen. at first, she ran away with the intention of finding her sister...but when she realized how impossible that would be, her goal became to get as far away from home as possible. it was at this point that she became whiskey. she did unthinkable things to survive: sex for money, stealing, breaking and entering. you name it, she’s done it. the rules don’t really matter when you’re living on the outskirts of society, so whiskey doesn’t really care to abide by them. her future is uncertain...all she knows is that she’ll never go back to south carolina. the rest is up to god.

full biography

jacqueline lucy daniels didn’t cry when she broke through her mama’s belly. everyone who had been in the room that day said she looked like a plum when the doctors finally pulled her out—a result of her umbilical cord being wrapped so tightly around her neck that it nearly killed her. in retrospect, jackie wondered if this was her body’s way of warning her or trying to spare her of what was to come.

annie lee daniels brought her first daughter home without her husband at her side. he was in vietnam, fighting for his country like all the good men were back then. she’d prayed and prayed and prayed that whiskey (or jack daniels, if we’re talking legal names) would be home by october of ‘66...that by some miracle he’d be sent back in time to hear jackie’s eventual first cry. but no. so annie sent him letters and tried to fill him in on his little girl’s life as best she could, but the postman never brought her a response. it wasn’t long after jackie’s birth that her mama got the telegram. jack wouldn’t be coming home.

after losing the love of her life in another pointless war, annie was devastated and utterly lost. how was she supposed to raise a baby by herself? bitter and angry at the world, she helplessly packed up the house she shared with her now dead husband and moved back to greenville, south carolina, to the same house she’d been born and raised in. jackie’s grandma, aunts and uncles felt as much like her parents as her mother did, and back then? life wasn’t half bad...dead daddy aside. but then came warren.

warren johnson was beautiful. everyone knew it—even jackie. he had hair as gold as the sun and eyes so blue and so kind they could make even the toughest men cry. it came as a surprise to no one that annie was smitten from day one. warren was a simple man. he was a miner and also a veteran who’d done a couple of tours in vietnam. most importantly, he was crazy about annie and jackie. he stepped into the role of ‘daddy’ faster than anyone else in the family could say ‘shotgun wedding.’ less than a year after they got together and married, warren and annie welcomed jackie’s baby sister, montana. at three years old, there was nothing jackie loved more than the gurgling baby girl her mother had brought home swaddled in a blanket.

life wasn’t kind to annie lee daniels johnson, because just when things were getting good, tragedy struck. again. warren and the other men who worked in the coal mines had started talking about going on strike given the conditions they were forced to work in, but their bosses weren’t having it. and then one day, in the middle of summer, the worst case scenario became reality. jackie was too young to fully grasp what had happened, but she gathered that there had been some sort of accident at work. it had been bad. and now, daddy number two had joined daddy number one in heaven or wherever it was that dead people went.

after warren, jackie watched as her mama became a complete shell of herself. one heartbreak was bad, but two? it was unsurvivable. as annie withered away, jackie got close to her aunt ruth, who helped her figure out how to take care of montana when mama wasn’t feeling up to getting out of bed. it was hard, but jackie did what she had to do. anything for her mama and anything for her sister.

when dale smith came knocking on annie’s door, begging for a chance to take her out on one date, jackie was nearly ten years old. he wasn’t much compared to jackie’s daddy or to motana’s, but he got mama out of bed. that was something. one date turned to two and with a man at her side again, annie had a newfound reason to live. she married dale and finally moved out of her family home with her girls. they were going to be a proper family and it wasn’t long until annie was pregnant again, this time with a boy.

the first time dale touched jackie was when annie was miscarrying in the backseat of his car on the way to the hospital. mama was nearly unconscious and jackie was in the front seat, in a state of complete shock, while dale reached over and did what most men did when no one could see them. after annie and dale lost their baby and the doctors told her she wouldn’t be able to have any more kids, things at home got bad. dale developed a drinking problem, which did nothing to help his anger issues or his inability to keep a job. the more dale drank and the harder it was for him to find work, the more he abused jackie. and it wasn’t just sexual, it was physical too. jackie never told a soul about what dale was doing to her. teachers and family questioned her about the bruises and broken bones, but she always lied. it wasn’t until the bruises started popping up on montana that jackie came clean and told annie. annie immediately left dale, but he found a way to weasel his way back into her arms. and then things would be good for a bit...and then they’d get bad again.

the cycle continued until jackie got to high school. once she was fifteen and started looking more like a woman than a child, her mom turned on her. suddenly she was a whore and it was her fault that dale did what he did. when montana got to high school, she got the same treatment. between the two of them, montana had always been braver. smarter. where jackie still had some hope that things would get better and that they could be normal, montana knew that the only way out of this fucked up situation was to take off. so that’s exactly what she did. jackie was 17 when she woke up and her sister had skipped town. she’d left behind her locket and a note that said you’re the only thing left for me here, but i can’t do this anymore. i love you. xx m. jackie never told her mama about the locket or the note. she let annie go on assuming the worst.

after montana ran away, everything got worse. annie became obsessed with finding her youngest, which meant she was neglecting dale, which meant he was fixated on jackie. given her age, jackie had started working at a local diner to start saving up her own money. it was her get the hell out of south carolina fund and it was her north start. jackie stored all of her cash in a shoebox under her bed, but one day when she got home late at night, a couple of months after montana had snuck out in the dead of night, she found the box empty. she knew immediately that dale had taken it, of course he had. after a disappointing confrontation with her mother about everything that had happened to her and to her sister since dale had walked into their lives, jackie decided she was done too. annie would never leave dale and dale would never stop. so, with nothing but the work uniform on her back and the locket and note her sister had left behind, jackie walked out the door to the nearest highway and stuck her thumb out. anywhere was better than here.

life on the road was lonely and scary for a while. but things got easier once she succumbed to her bad luck. she started doing unspeakable things for money like stealing and sleeping with men who offered to pay her. eventually any trace of jacqueline lucy daniels was gone. a few months of doing what she had to do to survive and she was no longer the meek, innocent girl who still believed she’d find her sister somewhere out there. now she was whiskey, like her father. cold, strong, esoteric and independent. she knew the rules of the road and how to stay alive on the streets.

now it’s been two years since she last walked out her mama’s door. she still wears montana’s locket, now rusted, but the note is long gone. she stole a walk-man from a fifty-something she slept with somewhere in arkansas and her crappy knapsack holds her journal, her most prized possession, but is otherwise stuffed with crappy hand-me-down clothes and mixtapes containing morrisey’s croons and janis joplin’s belts. she’s not scared of dying anymore. all she knows is that she’ll never go back to south carolina. the rest is up to god.

stats

Athletics: 0

Burglary: 3

Contacts: -2

Crafts (Sewing, mending, basket making, weaving, etc. etc.): 2

Deceive: 3

Drive (like, actual driving ability): -3

Empathy: -2

Fight: 2

Investigate: 2

Lore (Kinda like knowledge): 1

Navigation: 0

Notice: 3

Physique: 2

Provoke: 0

Rapport: -1

Resourcefulness: 3

Stealth: 3

Will: 2

extras

playlist - pinterest

#otr:intro

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jupitermelichios · 3 years

Text

So I’ve been playing a lot of skyrim lately, because it’s video game comfort food, and I decided it was time for my Redguard Dovahkiin to settle down. (Actually I specifically just wanted to be able to adopt some of the random orphans you meet because I felt guilty about them, but you need to be married before you can do that so that there’s someone at home to take care of the kids while you’re off galivanting).

So I travelled around a bit, chatting up likely looking npcs until I found one I both liked and didn’t feel guilty about marrying (I feel bad if I marry one of the warrior adventurer types, making them be a stay at home mum) and settled on an obnoxiously cheerful argonian called Shavee because her life was frankly shit, and I thought she’d probably be good with kids.

So off I go to Riften to the Temple of Mara to arrange the wedding. I book it in for the next day, realise I didn’t bring anything nice to wear, and spend the night before the wedding robbing every house in the city in the search for something to wear. Eventually decide everyone in Riften has terrible fashion sense and break down everything I stole into raw materials and use them to craft myself an outfit and some jewellery that i’m pretty happy with. I even carefully pick out my fanciest looking sword to wear.

(don’t know why I bothered, frankly, shavee turned up wearing a shirt covered in suspicious stains and weilding a pickaxe, it’s like she doesn’t even care about this marriage)

(also for comedy purposes, bear in mind I play with survival mods that mean my character needs to eat and sleep to live, and I literally spent the entire ingame night on this and forgot to eat and drink anything either and then just downed four bowls of wolf stew right before entering the temple so I didn’t starve during the ceremony. also I discovered during the wedding that I am dying of rockjoint, which I contracted from sleeping in a pile of hay on the floor of a skeever infested cave, so even being six foot tall and jacked can’t make up for the fact that I am exhausted, running a fever, and probably covered in wolf which I spilled because my joints are slowly atrophying, and even the fanciest clothes in the world aren’t going to cover that up)

so I enter the temple, and my finance is there, and Lydia my housecarl, and some random NPCs the game thinks are my friends because I did fetch quests for them

One of the random NPCs is Lisbet. Atfter I did her fetch quest, I then did another quest in which I discovered Lisbet is secretly a cannibal and part of a demonic cult that worships the daedric prince of decay by kidnapping priests, sacrificing them, and then eating their corpses. Raw. I think the raw meat is the sticking point for me here honestly.

I ultimately decided not to sacrifice the random priest to a daedric prince in exchange for one magic ring and all the raw human I could eat, because frankly, that doesn’t sound like much of a deal to me. I was expecting there to be some kind of dialogue choice where I could nope out at the last minute, but it turns out there isn’t one, so after they drugged the priest and tied him to the altar, I just got out my sword and started swinging.

I killed most of the cult (including the town butcher, because I had brought meat from him before and was extremely pissed off that he might have been secretly feeding me humans) but a couple of them got away, which I figured was fine because they weren’t trying to kill me.

Except it turns out, if any of them escape, then every time you see them in the future there’s a random chance that they’ll fly into a violent rage and try and murder you.

Lisbet is at my wedding. Lisbet decides that clearly me marrying this random argonian woman with two lines of dialogue is the happiest day of my life, and she cannot allow me that happiness, when I’ve taken so much from her.

So she tries to kill me. Only she can’t, because I’m stuck in a pre-rendered wedding animation, and also she’s sitting next to Lydia, my faithful retainer and owner of a really big axe.

It also turns out that Lisbet is essential, meaning she can be knocked unconcious but not actually killed because she’s needed for some quest or other. And the minute she wakes up from unconciousness, she tries to kill me again, so Lydia knocks her unconcious again, and I’m stuck, I can’t move, because I’m supposed to be in the wedding animation.

Except Shavee has, not unreasonably, see all this and decided that she doesn’t like me enough to risk getting murdered, and has done a runner, leaving me at the altar, but more importantly, leaving me trapped in a broken pre-rendered animation, so all I can do is stand there at the altar, staring at the space where my fiance was supposed to be, listening to the sounds of Lydia trying and failing to beat a cannibal to death behind me.

Okay, I think, clearly this wedding isn’t going to happen, I’m going to go for the registry office option and complete the wedding using the dev commands. I do this. The priest gives me a wedding ring, and I can finally move again. I chase after Shavee, who has an impressive turn of speed on her, and eventually catch up right by the city gates. I try to talk to her.

Apparently using the console has completed the wedding for me, but not for her, because she still only has the same 2 lines of dialogue she usually has.

Clearly this is working, I can’t leave my kids with someone who can only say 2 things and doesn’t even know she’s their mum, that’s irresponsible.

I try loading from inside the temple. I get the same problem.

Eventually I figure out that I need to use the dev controls to disable Lisbet’s entire existence in the universe.

Shavee and me get married. As the priest reads the vows, I stare at Shavee and wonder why she couldn’t even be bothered to put on a clean shirt. I wonder what kind of mother she’ll be.

Once the ceremony is over, and I’m happily married to the dirty green lizard of my dreams, and we’ve agreed that until I can make her recognise my extremely nice modded house exists I will share her single bed in the unheated flophouse in Windhelm she calls home, I re-enable Lisbet, because I’m worried I’ll forget if I leave it too long.

Fun fact about skyrim, it loads in quite a lot of npcs and objects by dropping them from the sky. I have no idea why this is the case, but it’s objectively the funniest way to load in objects.

I re-enable Lisbet. She falls from the sky, clips through the roof of the temple, and lands in the pew beside Lydia, stands up, draws a knife, and is immedately beaten unconcious.

I no longer care, because Shavee now has all the exciting new spouse-only romantic dialogue options like “Could you cook something for me” and “have you made any money lately”, and I know she’ll be a great mother.

I limp to the door of the temple, while around me the guests not involved in the Lydia-Lisbet murder cycle scream and duck for cover.

I open the door to the temple, immediately collapse and ragdoll down the steps, which is how I discover I am dying of rockjoint.

I limp to the orphanage down the street, adopt two kids, and then finally remember that I’m carrying garlic bread, which as we all know, cures all known illnesses.

When I emerge back into the street, full of the joys of motherhood and garlic bread, I find the town in disaray. Lydia is chasing Lisbet through the streets with an axe and a dragon is circling overhead, burning npcs to death. People are running for shelter, screaming, while the guards try to take down an entire dragon using only the worst bows and arrows in the game.

I decide that as a parent, I have to think of my own safety first and leave them to it.

I head out of the city, intent on returning home and figuring out why Shavee refuses to move in with me. A man hanging around the stables challenges me to a boxing match. For want of anything better to do, I agree.

Halfway through the fight he dodges at the wrong moment and I punch one of his horses in the head.

Two guards attack me while I desperately try to surrender. My kids will miss me, but I’m prepared to go to jail for my horse crimes, I’m an honest citizen. Also my horse crimes seem somewhat less important than the dragon.

The guards refuse to accept my surrender. I am stabbed to death. As I collapse in front of the indifferent horse, Lisbet exits the city, followed by Lydia. The last thing I see before I die is Lydia swinging her axe at Lisbet’s face.

#skyrim #spoilers #technically #although this game is a decade old and we all own at least two versions of it at this point #so i'm not sure it counts #long post

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lubdubsworld · 3 years

Text

The Devil’s Own.

Jungkook x OC

Mafia Au!

Warnings : Non-Con ! Manipulation, Degradation, Shitty hero with no redeeming Qualities you have been warned. ( i mean he does get better but not much.)

Summary : Just Mob Boss Jungkook doing mob boss things.

Chapter 1

“ Sign it. ”

I glared at him, feeling sick at the tone. The entitlement.

“No.” I said sharply and I could feel his anger swelling, morphing into something dangerous and deadly but I couldn’t care anymore. I was tired. Exhausted. This cat and mouse game had gone on , long enough. It wasn’t an even playing field, in any sense of the qword.

If today was the day I died, so be it. I would accept it. I would even welcome it.

I was done.

He had everything : an empire at his beck and call , enough money to pave the streets of Seoul in gold and an army of loyal associates behind him. His face was plastered on Billboards across the country , the President posted pictures of him on his fucking SNS and delegates from other countries had to wait weeks , just to get an appointment with the youngest billionaire South Korea had ever seen.

And yet none of those white collared dignitaries saw this side of him. The dirty, violent ruthless man who had more blood on his hands than anyone else in the country. My father’s. My brothers’.

Jeon Jungkook was both the most revered business man in the country and the undisputed king of Seoul’s criminal underbelly.

“You defiance only makes me want to break you in other ways Elena.” He said warningly and I felt my throat go dry. I stared at him, wondering how someone could look so expensively gorgeous and yet, like a hardened criminal.

The expensive silk shirt, the fitted slacks and the handmade shoes ought to clash with the dark ink that covered his entire arm and neck, the piercing on his eyebrow and the glint of metal on his tongue but it didn’t.

It just all came together to make him the most attractive man in existence.

I took a deep breath. Perhaps begging was the way to go?

“ You have my father’s company. You have my brother’s Hospital and you have the family mansion. It’s all yours. This bakery belongs to my mother. It’s all I have left of her. My sister in law is pregnant , due any day. She needs a place to stay and I don’t… I don’t have money to rent anywhere else.” I said desperately, thinking of the paltry wage I earned waiting tables. I could barely afford food for myself let alone for Jisoo and the baby on the way.

The bakery was abandoned but it had a roof. The furniture was crumbling but I could fix that. If I didn’t have to worry about rent, I could save up enough to make it livable. At least till I got a better job.

“I’ve offered you solutions for all of that.” He reminded me softly, eyes trained unblinkingly on me and I stared at him.

“I’m not going to be your whore.” I felt my voice shake.

He grimaced.

“You aren’t qualified to be my whore. And I don’t need one either. Whores are not my thing. I have a beautiful fiancée, don’t you remember? ” He grinned. I felt my heart ache because that fiancée was once my best friend. The only person I had trusted with my entire life. Lisa had betrayed my trust, had spied on my father’s operations and brought him down and I had the horrible, horrible inkling that she had also had something to do with my father and brother’s untimely death in a car crash.

But I couldn’t think about that. Every time I thought about her my heart broke and head spun, and I had to be at my maximum mental capacity if I was going to deal with her heartless fiancée.

“ If you ask me, you’re not fit for anything more than a back alley blowjob for a couple bucks. But Hoseok thinks you have potential. Join his agency, there are a lot of very wealthy men who have a bone to pick with your father. He made a shit ton of enemies. Most of them would love to fuck the defiance out of you. ”

His words felt like worms crawling all over my skin and I could feel the nausea churn inside me.

“I’m not signing the bakery over. You can call the creditors. I still have another year and half to pay the one remaining loan and they won’t come for me till then.” I felt my head begin to throb and Jungkook sighed.

“Suit yourself.” He stood up and I stayed still, watching his tall frame tower over me with ease. He gave me a small bitter smile. It was fraught with hatred and I stared back at him, knowing the emotion was probably mirrored in my gaze.

“Beautiful Elena. As pretty as the day you left me at the altar.” He smirked and I flushed.

“Your vengeance is petty and pointless and unfair…just like you.” I said angrily, frustration building u at his words. The way he talked about our broken engagement like it even mattered. It hadn’t even been real. We had hardly spoken and my father had called the wedding off at the last moment. But apparently, that had been the last straw for the Jeons. They had come after my father’s entire existence with a single minded intent to destroy him and they had succeeded. The man was dead . His two sons were dead.

But apparently it wasn’t enough.

Jungkook stared at me, slipping his hands into his pockets.

“Maybe. But it’s also deadly and potent. And it won’t rest until I see you reduced to nothing but a whore on the streets, spreading your legs for every man who can afford you.” He laughed. “ Saying no is a luxury , one that you’ll soon be unable to afford.”

I refused to be cowed, refused to give him the satisfaction of knowing that his words scared me. Because they did.

They scared me so damn much.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“This bed is so lumpy… I’m so sorry, unnie..” I said apologetically but Jisoo shook her head quickly, palms cupping my face as I held her elbows, gently lowering her to the bed. I stared at her feet, feeling my heart race at how swollen they looked. That can’t be normal, a voice whispered and

I didn’t know if that was normal and I had no money to take her to a clinic. The social center we usually went to only allowed three visits per month and we had used it all up. I wanted to throw caution to the wind and spend the thirty thousand won it would take but that would mean no groceries for a week and surely bread and eggs wouldn’t stretch that long, even if I could sneak meals in the restaurant for myself.

“I’ve been feeling a little dizzy…I’ll just sleep.” She said tiredly. She was thirty six weeks along, not due for another four weeks but her blood pressure was erratic. Her lab numbers were oscillating and there had been talks of an emergency c section. Even with insurance it was way more than I could afford but I had my own jewelry, a few expensive trinkets from my teenage years. I’d been obsessed with diamonds and my father had indulged me and I had a pair of earrings left. I’d already sold the rest but this would take care of the medical bills for the birth itself.

“My shift starts in ten minutes. I have to go. Give me a call if you need anything…” I said softly and I saw the familiar blank and listless look come into her eyes. I knew she was depressed, dealing with grief and pregnancy and loss but there was nothing I could do for her. Nothing. I had applied for a bunch of other jobs but they never wrote back. It wasn’t easy, being rejected over and over again but it wasn’t like there was much else I could do. And the truth was I was resigned to this, accepted that at some point I would have to take more loans and be stuck in an endless cycle of debt for the rest of my life.

And I had made peace with that.

There was no future for me. And I was okay with just surviving.

If only Jungkook would let me.

Apparently, watching me wipe down greasy tables and mop up floors and toilets trying to earn just enough to get a few square meals didn’t soothe his anger. It only fueled it. Jungkook couldn’t fathom that it had been six whole months of me on the streets of Seoul and I wasn’t completely destitute yet. I’d kept myself and my sister in law alive, safe and it pissed him off.

He wanted to see me broken and on my knees, begging him for help. The idea of me somehow surviving despite him taking everything away from me, it just didn’t sit well with him.

I couldn’t afford to have him as an enemy so all I could really hope was that one day he would wake up and give up. One day he would just wake up and decide that I wasn’t worth it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When I walked into my shift and noticed a familiar pair of high heeled Louboutins , completely out of place in my seedy place of employment, I knew I was in trouble. Lisa sat against one of the booths and her gaze was fixated on the door which meant she was waiting for someone. And when her eyes narrowed at the sight of me, I just knew I was the someone.

She wants to get me fired.

It wasn’t rocket science and I felt the urge to turn right back around and leave. But I tamped down on it. I could get through this. I would get through this. Lisa and Jungkook got off on invoking reactions and I wouldn’t give them that.

Except it wasn’t that easy.

It was a nightmare, watching her demand and reject and walk all over me but the sleeplessness from the past few days made spacing out easier and I just stared away at the wall as she yelled and complained and made a scene.

“You’ve stopped fighting? Finally giving up? Good…” She hissed when the manager apologized to her and told me to meet him after my shift and I felt myself tremble in indignation.

“I won’t fight you or Jungkook, you and I both know I can’t afford to.” I said quietly and she went still, something flashing in her eyes for a second. It was gone before I could fully process it but it had been there. Guilt.

Lisa wasn’t a terrible human. She had been a dear friend. We had grown up together and she had even hugged and teased me when I’d been betrothed to Jungkook, all those years ago. I had been twenty back then, naïve and spoiled. While Jungkook had taken my father’s entire legacy apart, piece by piece, Lisa had been nothing more than a pawn. I remembered all the times I had let her home, how she would disappear for lengths of time.

Planting bugs all over the house. All over his office. Jungkook had been smart. Someone like Lisa, so fascinated by thr wealth she had grown up around would naturally jump at the idea of more. It wasn’t greed. It was human nature. And with her help he had destroyed everything my father had built over decades.

I shuddered. My father hadn’t been a good man. He had been greedy, yes. But he hadn’t deserved to die. And Jungkook would have to pay for that sin, someday.

“There’s a job waiting for you in Hoseok’s club.” She smiled cruelly , “ you don’t need this one.”

“The fact that you want to take it away from me, tells me that maybe there’s nothing left in you save.” I said blankly and she turned her nose up at me.

“I have Jungkook. I don’t need to be saved.”

I shook my head. She was so naïve. Men like Jungkook cared for nothing but themselves. But I wondered if women like her didn’t care for anything but the money that came with being his. Money was precious, I thought bitterly. I’d never realized how privileged I had been until I’d had it all ripped away.

“He’s the one you need saving from. And one day you’ll realize that.” I shrugged, not in the mood to offer her anymore life advice. If she was alright with being a trophy wife in exchange for a few pretty shoes that was her prerogative.

Before she could reply, my phone rang.

“Hello?” I asked nervously and I felt my heart drop to my knees when I heard who it was.

I turned on my heel rushing inside and my manager gave me a look of surprise.

“ My sister..she’s… she’s sick. I need to go.” I said desperately and his eyes narrowed. It was the worst timing. He was already annoyed because of Lisa and I stared in disbelief as he quickly shook his head.

“No. I’m sorry Elena…I just can’t let you leave like that…” He said sharply.

It was so unfair.

“I haven’t taken a single day off in five months…” I said desperately..” Please, she’s pregnant..She needs me, she-“

“If you leave, you won’t have a job to come back to. I can’t do this.. First you make trouble with a customer and now you just want to walk out in the middle of your shift without any notice…”

“Fine. Fire me.” I snapped, because I’d just had enough of it. I was exhausted, and tomorrow I’d go knocking on some other tore and I’d get a job. I lived in Seoul …How hard could it be? For now, I had to get to Jisoo. I had to get the hospital and things would be okay.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It wasn’t okay.

“I… You want to keep her in? So soon?”

“Her blood pressure is through the roof. There are signs of severe pre eclampsia and we want to get her started on a magnesium drip. Steroids to help the baby’s lungs incase we need to deliver…”

“Deliver..?” I couldn’t breathe.

“Yes, I’m sorry…. If her blood pressure doesn’t come down we’re going to have to deliver.”

I nodded, glancing at the bed where Jisoo was sleeping, her face swollen and I knew that she was sick. Really sick. She looked pallid and ill.

“Is she going to be okay?” I asked hoarsely.

“We’re going to do what we can… But I’m going to be honest, we’re looking at a c section, a lot of meds and also some time in the NICU for the baby…. Can you afford it? Your sister’s insurance only covers 80% .”

I blinked, completely thrown. White noise rushed through my ears, a dull throb settling right at the base of my skull and beginning to spread all the way to my arms and back. It was panic mixed wth anxiety mixed with despair and I couldn’t quite cope. The earrings wouldn’t cover all that.

“Oh… Oh..yeah.” I said dully, “ Of course I can… Let me just…. Can I have a moment? There’s somethings I need to do.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I carefully slipped the cash into the envelope, swallowing as I sat on the pavement. I’d got another call from the hospital, they had administered the steroids but Jisoo’s condition seemed to be worsening. They wanted to try inducing labour soon but they wanted me to pay for the room and for the medicines, and apparently, the earrings weren’t as valuable as I thought they were.

I fought nausea wrapping arms around myself as I stared at the cars whizzing by, the putrid city air clogging my lungs as I tried to come to terms with what was happening. Jisoo needed help. She was the only one left and she carried my brother’s son. I felt my throat clog when I thought of Daehwan. He had been a good guy. I had loved him. It wasn’t fair, what Jungkook had done to my family, I thought miserably .

And the only reason I wasn’t driven by vengeance or anger was because I was nothing like Jungkook. I hated him. I didn’t want him to live in my head, didn’t want to waste any part of myself on him , not even my anger. But it was hard when he wouldn’t let me breathe, always at my heels like a wolf : jaws snapping and blood thirsty eyes trained on me at all times. I couldn’t fathom his obsession sometimes. Surely, his hatred was uncalled for now? He’d taken everything from me anyway.

There was a dull roaring in my ears, one that said that this was not really a surprise. I’d thought about it way too often, had considered it countless times. Had even spent one absolutely horrifying evening scouring the streets of Seoul’s red light district just to see how sex workers behaved.

I’d also realized that in the face of desperation, dignity didn’t hold much value.

You are going to pay your debts on your back and on your knees.

The first time Jungkook had thrown it at my face, eyes glinting with glee, my stomach had rebelled so hard. I’d been absolutely infuriated, had thrown a vase at him. And it had been awful, watching him catch it out of the air with ease, his mocking laughter making my bones rattle as he shook his head, “ That’s how this ends, Elena. Mark my words.”

And it was pitiful , that he went through life so consumed with hatred and vindictive cruelty that he couldn’t leave me alone . He was pathetic. That’s how I saw him. A pathetic child who refused to stop tormenting the helpless ant on the floor although it was no match for his cruelty.

At some point Jungkook was going to win. And his idea of winning was seeing me stripped bare of the one thing that kept me alive : my freedom.

It had just happened sooner than I’d thought.

Because I knew what it would mean, to go to Hoseok. He would own me. Hoseok’s whores were all slaves, tangled in his web so badly that there was no hope of escape. He wasn’t cruel but he was smart. No one left the his ‘ agency’ once they went in. I would be lost, forever. And I couldn’t stomach it.

I stared at my knees, fists clenched on the fabric of my skirt. I grabbed my phone, scrolling through the contacts. I considered it carefully. I had to do this on my terms. Had to make sure I retained some sort of control here.

And I knew just how to do it.

Hoseok picked up on the third ring.

“Hello.”

“I need help.” I croaked out.

The deep chuckle made my skin crawl.

“Elena Gong. What a wonderful, wonderful surprise. What can I do you for?” He drawled.

“Well sweetheart, I’m all out of charity so you’re going to have to make it worth my while.”

I took a deep breath.

“I’m a virgin.” I whispered.

The line went completely silent.

“What?” The amusement in his voice died.

“You heard me and I’ll let you cash in on it. I’ll let you auction it off…” I tamped down on the burning protest in my lung, the screaming inside my head that said it was horrifying, that I was considering this. “ But only if you keep my terms.”

“What makes you think you have a say in that.” He said sharply and I laughed.

“I belong to your world, Hoseok. Did you forget that we were friends, once.” I whispered and he didn’t reply.

Laughter, kindness, a big brother I could always count on, hobi oppa, nine year old me with my fingers curled around his wrist as we ran all around the gardens , a smile so wide that he could spread sunshine on the gloomiest days. Different from Jungkook and Namjoon and Yoongi and the others. Willing to include a ‘ girl’ in his playtime. Lisa and I the only girls, not even fazed watching as the rest of them wielded toy guns and mock interrogation scenes, pretending to kill and maim and torture because that was the world we were born into.

“We’re not friends, Elena. Let’s get that straight. The only part of you that holds any value to me is th part between your legs. So tell me, what do you want.”

“When was the last time you auctioned off someone’s virginity? You know how much money you can make off something like that. Not just from the sale itself but from the entire night. Your club… Your gaming hell…. All of it.”

“You expect me to believe you’re a virgin. At twenty seven.” He scoffed.

“Put the word out, everywhere. If you find one man who says he’s slept with me , I’ll back off.”

“That would require me to tarnish your family name. And you’re alright with that?”

I smiled biotterly.

“Isn’t that what you and your precious Jungkookie want? To see the last living Gong, be labeled as a whore and a slut.”

He didn’t reply.

“I’ll give you that. You can do it… You know that will only interest more people. As Jungkook so eloquently put it, most of them would love to fuck the defiance out of me.”

“What’s the catch. What do you want. ”

“2 billion won.” I said firmly “It will be one night. One night only and I want enough money to pay off every one of my father’s debts, to get me an apartment for my sister in law and to support her and her baby for a year at least.”

“Done.” He said without missing a beat and I went still. What must it be like, to throw around money like that without a care in the world. And it sickened me that Jungkook was probably ten times as rich as Hoseok , the money my father owed him and his associates not even pocket change in comparison to his gargantuan wealth and yet, he stayed on my heels, snapping his jaws like a dog with a bone.

“And Jungkook doesn’t get to watch.” I said softly, knowing exactly what Jungkook would get off on.

That made Hoseok laugh.

“You know him too well. I keep forgetting he was madly in love with you once.”

I resisted the urge to vomit. Jungkook didn’t know love. He knew ownership. He didn’t love me, he thought he owned me. That I was his to play with…. For the rest of his life. And when my father had denied him that, just like a toddler in a toy store being denied a shiny toy to break and trample on, he had thrown a temper tantrum.

Except his tantrums always ended in death and destruction.

“That’s the deal. He doesn’t turn up there to gloat.”

“He’s heading out to Switzerland for a week , two days from now.” Hoseok said evenly.

“Good then. My sister in law…she “ I swallowed. “ She’s in a hospital in Yongsan. I’ll send you the address.”

“I’ll take care of it. But I want you here tonight. I’m not going to drop a couple billion won on your head without making sure I’m getting my money’s worth. And I can’t have you changing your mind and bolting either. My reputation is on the line here. If I put out the word that I’m serving something so fucking delicious and then back out, they’re not going to want to buy Hobi’s wares anymore. You understand what I’m saying darling?” Hoseok drawled and I knew exactly what he was saying. If I agreed to this, it was blanket consent for him to whatever he wanted.

“I won’t back out. I can’t. But this is one night. One night with whichever bastard you choose and that’s it. I want out. I don’t want you or Jungkook hounding me again. Ever.” My voice shook as I dug my fingers into my knees.

“My men will be there in ten minutes. Sit tight, princess.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I stared at Hoseok as he carefully poured me a finger of whiskey, neat. He gave me a smirk and I shrugged.

“you remember.” I said casually, throat itching because it had been way too long since I’d had quality alcohol. I missed the burn, the warmth , the numbness that followed.

“Of course I do. You could drink all of us under the table with little effort. It was spectacular.” He laughed and I leaned back against the couch, letting my head fall back.

“I was half certain that you would have a doctor around to make sure I’m a virgin.” I stared at him and he shrugged. “ Pointless. You’re twenty seven, you’ve probably had stuff up there anyway… Not like your hymen’s still going to be intact.”

I thought it was rather horrifying, that I didn’t feel nearly as mortified as I should. This was how Hoseok talked, matter of fact and open and that was why he was so popular. Anytime an important person came into the country, Hobi was the one who offered entertainment for the night. Hobi’s girls were always the prettiest, most well behaved and perfect. They were educated, knew what they were talking about and he didn’t force them into the life. They loved it, enjoyed it and it showed.

Not to say he was a saint.

Far from it.

Hoseok knew how to dine with kings in castles but also how to wrestle with swine in the gutter. The seedy brothels in Seoul’s back alleys were his as well, and he ruled his kingdom with an iron hand. The prostitutes there feared him, one look or word enough to silence any rebellion, any thought of escape.

He was called Hope. And yet somehow that was exactly what he denied the women under him. There was no hope here. There was only lust and power and money. You came to Hobi…. You never left .

I took the glass he offered, taking a small sip, savoring the taste.

“But you believe me. I wonder why.” I watched him closely and he scoffed.

“Between your father and Jungkook, no one ever really had the pluck to come anywhere near you did they?”

Undisputable.

I sighed, leaning back to stare at him.

“Do you think dying hurts?” I asked softly.

It was frightening, how his entire body went stiff, eyes wide and jaw dropping.

“Elena, what the fuck-“

“Its just a question. You’ve killed people. You’ve watched them die… how do you think they feel?” I asked , curious.

“None of them wanted to die. If that’s what you’re asking.” The look in his eyes made me nervous.

I stared at him and the question was obvious. None of them wanted to die, but do you?

I didn’t.

“I’m not thinking of killing myself , oppa. Stop looking so horrified.” I laughed. He shook his head.

“ Don’t joke about that. It’s not fucking funny.”

I sobered up, remembering with a jolt. Ah, of course.

“I’m sorry. I forgot.” I said quietly.

Hoseok’s little sister had killed herself when I was seventeen. She was a year older than me and her father had lost her in a wager to a seventy year old man, known for torturing his bedmates. She had heard the news, taken a deep breath and taken a deep dive off the seventeeth floor of the condo where she lived with her mother.

I’d been engaged to Jungkook by then. And I had almost wanted it. Jungkook wasn’t old at least… twenty one to my seventeen.

“Just so you know, he’s going to find out. And he’s not going to like it.”

I shrugged. Three years is a long time to be preyed upon and now my mind was resigned to a life of being hunted. Hoseok was right. Jungkook would find out and he wouldn’t like it.

Good.

“I don’t care what he does anymore. All I care is that Jisoo and the baby are left out of whatever plans he has…. If you promise me you’ll keep them safe , I’ll cooperate.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was a baby boy.

I stared, fingers itching to hold the baby but it was impossible, the little one whisked away to the NICU right after with respiratory distress and Jisoo had gone into a seizure, eyes rolling back into her eyes.

She as alright now, resting in a VIP room with the best care money could buy. Hoseok had asked me if I was happy with the arrangements, and if I would name the boy after him.

I stared at the room, large and breezy and filled with flowers and gifts, toys and baby stuff and I knew right then that I had sealed my fate. I was going to have to go through with this. I could imagine how much Jisoo would protest when she came to her senses. The only relief was that it would take her a few days to be good enough to fight or protest. But then this would all be over and done with.

Jungkook would leave this afternoon. His flight was at three.

I would reach the club at five. The patrons would arrive at seven.

One night, I reminded myself , staring at the gentle rise and fall of Jisoo’s chest as she slept, my fingers playing with the soft skin on her wrist. The IV line went through her veins and I watched the gentle drip of it.

One night.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I didn’t know how auctions happened and while I’d been prepared for the worst kind of humiliation, Hoseok assured me that he wasn’t going to make me stand naked on some podium or something.

“Generally, I would do something like that simply for the flair of it but consider this a favor ….a respite because you were, as you said, once a friend.” He gave me an even smile and I could only nod in mute relief.

I was grateful. Beyond grateful.

And what was more, he hadn’t told anyone, who I was.

That stunned me. Because wasn’t that the selling point? The murderous, greedy mob rat Gong Hyo Suk’s only daughter forced to spread her legs for one lucky stranger? If Hoseok had cashed in on that he would have made a fortune. But he hadn’t. I wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing. Would , whoever it was be upset if he recognized me?

I was led to a bedroom, large and tastefully decorated with silky satin sheets and dark curtains and dim lighting that lit up parts of the room and left other parts plunged in darkness. Hoseok had told me to wear whatever I wanted and I realized with a pang that he really didn’t see this as some sort of transaction. He was trying to make it as easy as possible without making any decisions for me. Offering me choices and options and some illusion of being in control.

I didn’t have anything fancy so it was just a dress shirt that I borrowed from Hoseok. I’d left the underwear off, eager to merely get the whole thing over with. I felt a sudden overwhelming urge to laugh out loud.

If Jungkook were here he really would have lost his damn mind, simply because of how little this whole thing affected me. And that was it, really. He was always desperate for a reaction.

Earlier when this whole thing had started, I’d obliged him with that. I would scream, rant and yell….launch myself at him like a wildcat, scratching at him , fists flying and it was obscene, how much he seemed to enjoy that. He would press me up against walls and tables , fingers choking the breath out of my lung, just so he could see me struggle and push back.

He fed off from every negative reaction I offered him and it had taken me a long long time that the way to beat him was to become passive, unresponsive. I would go limp in his arms, stare at him blankly as he tried to manhandle me and that…that had pissed him off. Because that meant I wasn’t playing his game anymore.

If the prey wasn’t playing, the game wasn’t fun anymore. It was drab.

Boring.

And I knew that Jungkook kept raising the stakes, kept tightening the noose around my neck….just to bring that girl out again. The one that had wanted to put up a fight . The one that wanted to mouth off even with the muzzle of a gun pressed against her head. The one who would spit in his face in front of all his associates, even if it earned her a vicious strike of his hand across her face.

I shuddered. They weren’t memories I liked reliving.

Well, if that was who he wanted, I’d make sure he would never see her again.

The door opening made me jump and Hoseok came in , with a wide grin on his face.

“Baby…. Your guest for the night.” He said softly and I peered over his shoulders, my heart and mind grinding to a halt when I caught sight of what had to be the most breathtakingly beautiful man on the face of the planet.

I felt my heart begin to pound, fear taking over because this wasn’t okay. Not really. I was okay with old, creepy and disgusting , not able to get it up for more than ten minutes.

I wasn’t okay with someone who looked like they stepped right out of the latest issue of GQ.

Hoseok left quickly, closing the door behind him and the man stepped into the light, the brightness lighting up his perfect features even more. I felt my throat go dry, and fought the urge to get up and run. Growing up as the daughter of a mobster , I’d learned how to trust my instincts over appearances.

And right now, every single one of those instincts screamed at me that this man was absolutely dangerous.

“Well, you are beautiful. I’ll give you that. “ He said casually.

“Thank you.” I said stiltedly, watching as he tugged on his tie, pulling it off his neck deftly . Instead of tossing it aside , he wrapped it a bunch of times around his wrist over and over as he smiled at me.

“Don’t thank me yet. The only reason I like beautiful things is because of how easily they break.” He smiled. “ I haven’t been with a virgin in a while…. I miss the screams.”

And there it was the full blown panic that came with stark terror. I crawled back on the bed, staring as he moved closer and there was no mistaking the look on his face, the harsh grip of his hand on my ankle telling me that I was going to regret every one of the choices that led me here.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Hoseok wasn’t at the airport.” Jungkook observed casually, glancing at Yoongi as the latter finished cleaning his gun carefully, eyes fixed on his weapon with utmost concentration.

“He’s holding some sort of auction tonight. Some chick …” Yoongi said casually and Jungkook hummed. It was not the kind of thing he was interested in. Anonymous bids were often boring : actresses or female idols past their prime, desperate to make some money to survive. He had no interest in those but he was a little peeved that Hoseok hadn’t told him anything about it.

Hoseok was one of Jungkook’s most trusted friends. He was almost as powerfully rich as Jungkook and the only reason Jungkook reigned supreme was because Hoseok had no interest in challenging him for the throne. Hoseok was dangerous and cunning and loyal and Jungkook was grateful to have him on his side and he had hoped to see him before leaving. Just to ask him to keep an eye on Elena.

He grimaced, hating himself.

God, he couldn’t go two hours without thinking of her. It fucked with his head, the amount of space she took up inside him. Jungkook , for all his wealth and power, was driven solely by his need to prove himself. He wanted to be powerful and terrifying yes, but more than that , he wanted people to know.

He wanted people to look him in the eye and acknowledge him for what he was : the most dangerous man in the country. He liked seeing that fear, that worship, that admiration. He got off on it. He wanted it , craved it and for some reason he craved it more from her , than anyone else.

And instead of giving him what he wanted, instead of begging on her knees for mercy, instead of licking his shoes and begging for him to let her live….she ignored him. She looked at him with defiance and pride, her chin straight and her back unbending, her gaze locked right on him like she was his fucking equal….

And Jungkook, he’d taken a lot of insults. Taken more than his fair share of hits in life …..

But when she looked at him like that , like he was something stuck to the bottom of her shoe….

Fuck it drove him wild with fury.

It made him want to teach her a fucking lesson, to remind her that he owned her because he owned everything. To break her down, snuff out the flames of defiance that burned so bright in those ember eyes… Take her into his bed and brand her with his body. Till she was on the floor, on her knees covered in his spit and cum begging for mercy….

Because no one looked at Jeon Jungkook like that and lived to tell the tale..

“Seokjin’s here. Landed in Korea a couple of hours ago. ” Yoongi said casually and Jungkook smiled a bit at that. He loved his older brother, technically a step brother and growing up he had only saw him when he visited his mother in China. That meant a couple of months a year and now as adults, a bit more often because Seokjin loved Jungkook and liked to visit him often.

Seokjin was a celebrity trainer, working with actors and athletes and he did a good amount of modeling as well. He was rich, handsome and well liked and the only thing that gave away the Jeon blood in him was the fact that he was a sexual sadist.

The face of an angel with a devilish streak, he had a penchant for sadism and inflicting pain on his partners and while Jungkook didn’t particularly enjoy indulging him, he knew there were women who were into that and usually had them arranged for when Seokjin dropped by in Korea. His hyung’s visit seldom lasted more than a few weeks at a time and it was a pity that he would miss out one whole week of it .

But the issue in Switzerland was a little pressing and Jungkook had to be there in person to sort it out.

He leaned back against the seat, staring out of the window, sighing.

“An unsullied dove ….What the fuck is this shit..” Yoongi muttered and Jungkook turned, curious.

“What?”

“Hoseok’s been hyping up some new girl for the auction and Seokjin hyung’s bidding on her.”

Jungkook laughed at that.

“Jungkook…..” Yoongi’s voice is completely stunned, his eyes confused as he looks up at Jungkook.” Its Elena.”

Jungkook’s thought process came to a grinding halt.

There’s a sound between his ears, a dull rushing sound like the wind in a storm and he can’t quite comprehend what he just heard. Even Namjoon who had been buried in his laptop , looked up then, tugging an airpod out of his ear.

“Wait…did you say Elena?” His eyes were wide , lips parted in shock. Yoongi and Namjoon exchanged glances, no doubt bracing themselves for the explosion that was to follow.

Jungkook took a deep breath.

“Turn the fucking plane around.”

That jolted Namjoon out of his stunned stupor..

“Turn-? Jungkook what…. We’re on a fourteen hour flight-“ Namjoon began but the look on Jungkook’s face made him stop.

“DID I FUCKING STUTTER?”

Namjoon swore.

“Fucking hell… alright just calm the fuck down, Jesus…just put a fucking bullet in that girl’s head and spare us all the headache fuck…” He growled, unbuckling his seat belt and rushing to the cockpit and Yoongi groaned.

“ Let me guess you want me to get in touch with someone in Seoul and ask Hoseok to hold off on letting Seokjin near her…”

Jungkook glared at him.

“If you already know that why the fuck are you still here…” He growled and Yoongi gave him a look.

“Just tell her you’re in love with her and let us live, Jeon Jungkook.”

In love….. what the fuck….

He glared at Yoongi’s back, his asinine words making him madder. God he wanted to crush someone’s skull into dust with his bare hands.

And right now, in his head , that skull belonged to Jung fucking Hoseok.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“What just happened?” I asked, frantic staring at the door as Hoseok’s men casually led a fuming Seokjin away while the man himself stared at me, looking pale as parchment.

“ Jungkook found out.” He said shortly and I felt my heart drop although I was half relieved because there had been something insane in Kim Seokjin’s gaze when he’d reached for me , a cruel glint of hunger that told me he would have hurt me really badly if Hoseok hadn’t barged into the room , frantic and worried.

He had given Seokjin a wide smile and then, “ I’m so sorry. We were waiting on her blood results and turns out she has a…. well, certain occupational disease that is very infectious.”

Seokjin’s mouth had dropped open even wider than mine.

“I thought she was a fucking virgin.” He had snapped, and I flinched at how cold and furious he had sounded.

But apparently there was a reason this whole thing had happened.

“What do you mean Jungkook knows? What does that mean?” I asked frantically, fear taking over.

“ He’s heading back here… He wants to see you.”

I felt my entire body go ice cold as I shook my head…

“No…fucking no bring Seokjin back here , he can fuck me that was the fucking deal, Hobi, please don’t../…”

“Elena , I’m so fucking sorry.. Seokjin…he’s fucked in the head…. He likes hurting his whores, likes making them bleed and he would have fucking destroyed you…”

I gaped at him horrified.

“What?!” I hissed shaking my head in disbelief.

“He’s Jungkook’ stepbrother. I’ve arranged whores for him before, I knew he was a little crazy but I’d never seen him before and I didn’t know he was the Kim Seokjin…fuck he outbid everyone and fucker looks like a fucking angel, how the fuck was I supposed to know he’s unhinged? Thankfully, I messaged Yoongi and …. Fuck… Listen… I know I paid for your sister’s surgery but you’re going to have to pay me back….”

I felt my body convulse in rebellion.

“I can’t.. You know I fucking can’t…”

“I can’t make an enemy out of Jungkook…. I can’t.” Hoseok shook his head. “ You can get out of here now if you want but I’d advise you to stay. If you run it’s only going to make Jungkook angrier.”

“WHAT DID I FUCKING DO TO HIM?!!!” I screamed, feeling my composure crumble into smithereens. “WHAT THE FUCK DOES HE WANT FROM ME?!!”

Hoseok flinched, stepping back and holding his hands up.

“Whether I want to or not, I answer to Jungkook. I shouldn’t have done this in the first place , I’m sorry Elena.” He shook his head and stepped back like the coward that he was and I wanted to hurt him. To shake him and ask him to fucking remember who I was. That I had nothing to do with my father’s sins . That I had been a fucking marionette in his hands, had wanted nothing more than to be left alone.

I stared at him in disbelief.

“So much for being a friend…” I whispered.

His jaw tightened. But he didn’t look guilty. None of them ever did. It was like guilt didn’t exist in their world. They did what they wanted to whoever they wanted , whenever they wanted and they got away with it because that bastard’s word was law. What Jeon Jungkook wanted, he got.

“I’ll get your clothes sent in.”

I watched him leave, the door slamming shut behind him and sagged against the bed, staring at myself. What had just happened?

Was I born to endless misery and misfortune?

Couldn’t I catch a fucking break?

I’d agreed to sell myself hadn’t I? Would have even let Seokjin hurt me if that was what he wanted. Because it was one night. It was one night of this…whatever the hell this was and then freedom. That was the deal.

The door opened again and I stared as a young girl brought me a pile of my clothes neatly folded.

“Do you work here?” I said sharply.

She blinked before bowing her head.

“Yes, mistress.”

I scoffed.

“Don’t call me mistress , I’m here to get fucked, just like you. Tell me does Jungkook ever use the women here.” I demanded.

She looked trapped, glancing at the door, clearly wanting to run .

“Tell me.” I snapped and she flinched.

“I..uh..yes. Sometimes.” She said softly.

“Can you tell whoever fucks him next to kick him in the fucking balls?”

The girl bowed deeply and all but ran out and I sighed, feeling myself shaking. Jungkook was on the way here and I wanted to yell and scream and rave at him but I knew that was exactly what he wanted. I wanted to deny him the satisfaction …wanted to act all cool and composed in front of him but it was impossible…

Because I hadn’t realized just how tired I was of this whole thing, till right this moment, when the end had been in sight. I was supposed to get my two billion won pay off all the debt , give Jisoo the rest of the money and disappear. I was so tired, so tired of this life I’d gotten trapped into, slaving over for hours on end just to afford a couple of meals a day. No friends, no boyfriends, no hope of a future …..

The door banged open and I jumped, crawling back when I recognized the man who had just entered.

“Yoongi-“

“Jungkook wants to see you.” He ground out and I swallowed.

“I need to get dressed. Please just wait outside.” I said shakily.

And then the door opened further and a tall looming shadow stepped in familiar and vomit inducing.

Jungkook looked livid, piercing glinting through the dimply lit room and I stared at him. He was dressed in a tight black t shirt, he sleeves stretched thin over his biceps and the tattoos stark against his skin.

“Leave us.” He said softly and Yoongi moved away to the door leaving me alone with the devil himself. I cursed myself for not putting at least my panties on, I was naked underneath this shirt and although it was big it left nothing to the imagination.

Jungkook’s eyes raked over my form before resting on my face.

“You think you’re smart enough to outsmart me, Elena?” He whispered softly.

I swallowed.

“Send you brother back in. He can fuck me and I’ll pay you back.”

Jungkook hummed, stepping closer and grabbing my clothes from the bed, he grabbed the plain white bra and the pastel pink underwear and then to my complete and utter mortification he brought the clothing up to his face, breathing in .

“Fucking pervert!!!” I screamed, feeling the action like a physical touch and wanting to claw his eyes out and the smirk on his face told me that this was exactly what he wanted but I was too fucking gone to care.

“If you want me to be a whore, fine. I’ll be a whore. But on my terms…” I spat out and he shook his head, laughing.

“I don’t just want you to be a whore, Elena. I want everyone to know that you are one…” He dropped my clothes and moved closer, holding a hand out. “ Come here.”

I stared at the inked fingers, adorned with sterling silver rings and bracelets with the motifs of his gang. I shook my head.

“No. I’m not playing this game with you.” I turned my face away.

His hand shot out gripping my upper arm with enough strength to bruise and I screamed, agony shooting up my arm and shoulders as he dragged me off the bed and onto the floor. I landed hard, hips and elbows bruising from impact and I stared at him in disbelief.

“I’ve been to gentle with you. You’ve forgotten your fucking place.” He bent over and grabbed me by my hair, yanking me to my feet so hard that it felt like my scalp had been ripped away from my skull.

“Okay…okay…Okay Jungkook..just…!!” I said softly, flinching because my pain tolerance was almost zero and Jungkook’s grip was so hard that my eyes were beginning to water now. He let me go, grabbing my panties off the floor and tossing them at me.

“I’m going to count to five. Put those on and get out.”

He walked out of the door and I stumbled a little fumbling with the fabric before quickly, slipping my legs in and yanking it up to my waist. I made to put on something else but his voice came, loud and impatient.

“Get the fuck out here.”

I walked out of the door and he was standing there next to Hoseok. I couldn’t meet either of their gazes , hating how they had so much power over my life. I stared at the floor. It was tempting to yell at them and scream but that never led anywhere.

“ I’ve asked them to stop the payment on the Hospital bill. Seeing as Elena hasn’t kept her end of the bargain.”

I felt my breath hitch at that, willing down the tears as I glared at him.

“What do you want?” I snapped. “ Tell me who you want me to fuck…. I’ll do it. Let’s get this over with so you can go back to whatever sewer you fucking climbed out of. ….”

Hoseok’s breath caught like he couldn’t believe what I’d just said and the look in his eye was a warning but I was sick of this. Sick of them all.

Jungkook turned to Hoseok with a laugh.

“You see hyung? See why I can’t let her go? If I let her scot free, everyone’s going to think I’m a pushover….that any worthless bitch can talk to me any way she wants and get away with it….” He shook his head, staring at me with a glint in his eye. “ I’m not going to choose. They are. You think you can charm your way into Hoseok’s heart and get special treatment? You think you’re ready to be a whore, Elena? Let me show you how a real whore gets treated in Hoseok’s club.”

He gripped my wrist, yanking me behind him as he stalked off down the narrow corridor that opened up into the club. I let myself get dragged out into the club dismally aware of the fact that I was wearing nothing but Hoseok’s shirt. I could feel eyes on me but I kept mine on the back of Jungkook’s head as he dragged me all the way to the front. I knew what he was going to do and at this point I was just numb.

There was no point reasoning with the devil.

I glared at him as he pointed at the stage. “ Get up there.” He whispered harshly.

I stared back at him, not moving. I saw Jungkook’s jaw clench.

“Either you go up there by yourself, with your clothes on. Or I carry you up there, after stripping you naked. What’s it going to be? ”

I glared at him, pursing my lips before climbing up using the small stair in the side. I moved to the center, right in front of the stage lights, so the rest of the room would disappear. I had no wish to see any of the bastards in the room.

“I think all of you recognize this little beauty here, don’t you?” Jungkook’s voice was cheerful, friendly even and I bit my lips, fists clenched. “ Well, if you don’t let me tell you . This is Gong Hyo Suk’s daughter. Remember that bastard? He put a hit out on my father. Killed him and my mom on the night I was supposed to be marrying his fucking daughter. A daughter who later called off the wedding, because I was too poor now, to give her the life she deserved. ”

I felt the familiar ice cold guilt in my vein. I was seventeen, I wanted to scream. I was seventeen and all I did was say what my father asked me to say, do what my father asked me to do.

“ That was nine fucking years ago… and you know what I told myself…. I told myself, that a greedy little bitch like this, doesn’t deserve shit.” He laughed. “ If money’s what she values the most, then the only thing she deserves is to be treated like the whore she is.”

“Why don’t you guys tell me, how much money you’d be willing to spend, to fuck her? Come on, Hobi’s been treating you guys so well lets help him make some money tonight… be generous. ”

I could barely hear what they were calling out but when Jungkook climbed onto the stage next to me, I jumped. Moving back instinctively, I winced when brought a forearm around my throat nearly choking me as he dragged up against his body.

“90 million won….That’s a lot.” He grinned. “ Jihan hyung….. that was you right? You’re gonna pay 90 million won for her?”

I felt my heart race, it was a lot. More than enough for the Hospital Bills, would even leave extra to get a decent apartment somewhere... I grabbed his wrist as it pressed into my throat, trying to pull his hand off me but he just wrapped his free hand around my waist, wrapping his entire body around mine and chuckling into my hair.

Jungkook pressed his head against mine and I froze, hating the close contact.

“Okay…but since I’m feeling a bit left out here…Why don’t I pitch in… 500 Won.” Jungkook said loud and clear.

I froze. An eerie silence fell over the club, laughter stilling and the clink of glasses slowing down.

What.

I struggled to get away from his but his hold tightened.

“Anyone else?” He called out. “ Come on… Not even thousand? Surely you think this one here’s worth a thousand won? Aren’t you going to outbid me?”

No one responded of course they didn’t. Jungkook’s anger was palpable and no one was going to get on his wrong side …..

“Ahh… is that it then? Bid’s going to close for 500 won then…. Hear that baby?” He whispered against my ears and I swallowed. “ 90, million won to five hundred won in a few seconds… What does that tell you?”

“It tells me you’re a fucking psychopath in love with your own voice… Get off me.” I hissed.

“No. What it tells you is that only I get to decide how much that body of yours is worth, not you. . You don’t get to go sell your fucking body behind my back for two billion won and then pay off all your debts and ride off into the sunset, that is not how this works….”

I went limp in his arms fighting tears because he never played fair. Never.

“Hear that Hoseok-ah… I win her for the night for 500 won…fair and square…. Is that alright?” He called out into the darkness and I felt the first inkling of dread begin to seep in.

“No.. No… get off me.” I hissed and he laughed, dragging me off the stage with ease. I screamed, kicking out in disbelief.

Jungkook grinned at me, before grabbing both my arms and yanking them behind me, and I whimpered, unable to move as he easily pulled me along to the door that opened into the hallway. Behind us I heard Hoseok’s voice.

“Jungkook, don’t be impulsive. Think about whatever you’re going to do.”

I flinched at that, panic building.

“He’s not going to do anything. I’ll fucking kill him if he touches me , I-“

“Shut the fuck up, you little bitch.” He shook me hard till my teeth rattled and I sobbed out.

“Jungkook…” Hoseok warned but he merely snarled.

“I know what I’m doing hyung, just…. Don’t disturb us. And make sure everyone here knows that she’s open for business.” It was loud enough to carry through the club and I felt humiliation burn my throat, acrid like acid.

I froze in disbelief.

“Jungkook …” Hoseok’s voice held a tone of reproach.

“ And tell them that her body is amazing. Tell them she spent the night with me , the best fuck I’ve ever had , mouth made for cock.”

I stared straight ahead as he pulled me all the way to the room we had left earlier and I tripped when he shoved me inside, landing on my hands and knees . I quickly rolled back around to land on my ass, crawling back as he slammed the door shut and locked it from the inside.

He stared down at me, mouth grim.

“You do owe me a wedding night. I was so ready to fuck your tight cunt, nine years ago… I think I’ve waited long enough yeah.”

I stared at him in disbelief. I knew exactly what he wanted me to do, to yell and scream and protest and fight so he could get off and forcing me…. Fucking psychopath.

I took a deep breath and nodded.

“If you pay for my sister in laws bills, and give me an apartment sure. “ I shrugged. “You’re not any different from any of the bastards here. I don’t give a damn which one of you idiots wants to rut into me like the absolute animal that you are…. I don’t care…” I said softly.

“you don’t? Really? You want me to tell you what your brother said when one of my men put a gun into his mouth…. He begged for his life…said he had a kid on the way….” Jungkook laughed, shaking his head. “I told him it was better than what his father did…. My sister was six months pregnant when his lieutenant gunned her down on the streets.”

I shuddered, wrapping my arms around myself.

“Why are you telling me this…” I snapped.

“Because she didn’t deserve it did she, Elena? She didn’t fucking deserve to die like that , like a dog on the street when she had nothing to do with any of this…. She didn’t deserve it.” He growled, bending down and gripping my chin hard.

“Maybe she did deserve it.” I spat out. “ If I deserve to be here, maybe your sister deserved to die too. “

He snarled, hand flying to my hair and dragging me up off the floor in one sharp yank. I whimpered as he pushed me on the bed, before climbing on top of me. I felt like every bone in my body was about to snap in two, the weight of him unbearable on me.

“I won the bid tonight…. I won it fair and square… You signed the waiver didn’t you…that you agreed to the auction…I won and I’m going to fucking collect.” He growled, and I kicked out, trying to buck him off of my body.

“Get off me.” I hissed. “ I’m not letting you fuck me for 500 won.”

“How about for your Jisoo then?” He whispered and I went still.

“What?”

He chuckled, reaching down and I felt my pulse pound as he pulled his phone out, dialing quickly and turning on the speakers.

Yoongi’s voice made me go ice cold. Everyone knew what Yoongi did for Jungkook.

“Daehwan’s wife is in a hospital room in Yongsan. Hobi’s got the details. I think she’s served her purpose.”

“No!! JUNGKOOK NO!!” I screamed , thrashing so hard my head began to spin but he grunted pressing down into me harder.

“Are you serious? I’m not home yet… I can take care of it tonight.” Yoongi said, voice casual and I sobbed, shaking my head in sheer terror.

“Okay… I’ll behave.. I promise.. please just don’t…”

Jungkook hummed.

“Well, that was easy… Yoongi-yah… why don’t you stay on the phone yeah…. Going to get that wedding night I’m owed and if my baby doesn’t co operate you know what to do, yeah?”

I bit my lips, glaring into the sheets as he gripped my waist, pulling me up.

“Ass up like the bitch that you are, baby.” He whispered and I felt my entire body shudder in disgust. It was worse because I hadn’t done this before. Didn’t know what to expect. But I couldn’t let him know that. If Jungkook knew that I was a virgin, I could just imagine how much fun he’d have with that info.

Hands gripped my wrists, pinning them to the bed and I turned my face away when I felt the press of his lips on my cheeks. He gripped both my wrists with one hand, keeping them pinned over my head and I flinched when I felt his fingers pulling the fabric of my panties aside, just enough for the blunt head of his cock to press against my slit.

“Yoongi, you there?” Jungkook said softly and Yoongi grunted over the phone. I felt my face flame in embarrassment.

“You’re a sick bastard but I’m used to it. What’s up?” he said casually.

“Remember how we used to wonder just how tight Elena’s cunt was… back when we were in school.”

Fucking monster, I thought in disbelief. I hate him I hate him I hate him….

“Good times…” Yoongi chuckled lightly .

Jungkook pushed into me in one hard thrust and pain shot straight up my spine, my insides burning like he’d fucked me with a knife and not his body. I couldn’t stop the cry of agony that got torn of me, my eyes tearing up and tears spilling over onto my cheeks.

“Damn Jungkook, she okay?” Yoongi’s chuckle made me want to claw his face off, and just the urge to kill was growing inside me.

“Well, I can confirm that it is, in fact just as tight as we thought…” He grunted, thrusting into me at a pace that was inhumane, every push and drag of him rubbing my insides raw and I bit down on the sheets under me, afraid that I would do something absolutely humiliating, like beg him to stop.

“Good, you should let me take that tight ass for a ride someday then. With her permission of course…. I’m a gentleman after all. Big on consent.” He laughed and I swallowed the urge to tell him that I would puncture his balls with a switchblade if he came anywhere near me.

“Oh, she’s going to do whatever I ask her to….aren’t you baby…” He grunted, “ Turn around so I can see you.”

He pulled out of me, his weight lifting off my body as he moved away. I couldn’t move, limbs numb and insides throbbing in pain . His palm landed on my thigh, hard and the sharp sting of it made me jump.

“I said turn around, I want to see your face when I fuck you.” Jungkook growled. I stayed limp, breathing hard and he grunted impatient, fingers sinking into my hair , yanking me to my knees and the movement made my legs scream in protest.

“How’s she so quiet? You fucked the voice out of her, kook-ah?” Yoongi asked amused and Jungkook pulled me by the hair, dragging me to the center and pushing me down till my head landed on the pillow.

“Hyung you should see her right now, all fucked out …. Like she’s never had a dick in her before.” He shook his head, “ Fucking slut. Take that off and hold yourself open for me.”

I stared at him, uncomprehending and he grabbed both my hands, placing them on my knees.

“Grab your knees and pull your legs back… So I can fuck that tight cunt the way I want to.” He said slowly, like I was a dog he was trying to train and I stared at him , defiantly.

“ Go to hell.” I whispered.

Yoongi’s laughter came from somewhere to the right.

“Your dirty talk needs work, Kook ah… Tell her she’s a precious little kitten and she makes you feel really good…. Bitches love that shit…”

Jungkook hovered over me, grabbing the back of my thighs and spreading them wide enough to make me whimper in pain.

“Is that so babygirl? You want me to tell you that? That you make daddy’s cock feel good?” He cooed, nudging the tip against me again and I had never hated anyone so much in my life. I stared up at his face, and he smiled at me, a cheeky little grin that made his bunny teeth stand out and for a second he looked so deceptively angelic and the glimmer of his piercing caught my eye.

I couldn’t help but swallow, gaze trained on the glint of metal on his tongue.

“You like that?” He grinned suddenly, sticking his tongue out for me to see, I felt my eyes widen at how sinfully good he looked .” Hyung she likes my tongue piercing.”

“Show her how it feels on her clit.” Yoongi laughed and I could barely fully process what I heard before Jungkook was crawling down my body, arms, curling on my thighs and yanking me onto his tongue .

I felt the press of his tongue on my slit, licking right into me and the jolt of pleasure was so unexpected, the pleasure so unwanted and yet so overwhelming and I couldn’t stop the way my body thrashed against the streets, lips parted as I practically mewled out in pleasure.

“Definitely a kitten…” Yoongi called out and I shuddered as Jungkook slipped two fingers into me , the ice cold press of his ring inside me making me jump. I wanted to pull away, grab his hair and yank him off but I couldn’t because it was

“Next time I’ll put the dick piercing in too, yeah? Fuck you with a bit of metal on my cock so you can feel that up there…. ” He laughed into my thighs and I screamed when he bit into the flesh there , hard.

“I’m getting bored… Either turn on facetime so I can at least jerk off to this , or I’m hanging up…” Yoongi called out .

“Hyung she clenches down on me every time she hears your voice… Just stay on for a few more minutes yeah, she tastes so fucking good, I’m gonna cum soon….” Jungkook added another finger, slipping in deep before spreading them apart inside me. I whimpered when he pushed his tongue in between the wet digits, licking into my walls and I could feel the ball of his piercing drag against my walls, ice cold and hard.

Was it fucked up that I did clench down on him again, my body apparently a slave to my base desires even as my mind screamed that he was the absolute worst bastard on the face of the planet.

“Elena, you owe me a blowjob at least for this…” Yoongi called out and I glared at the phone.

“I’ll bite your fucking dick off if you come anywhere near me.” I snapped.

“Fuck, I could get off just to that mouthy fuckhole of hers…..” Yoongi grunted.

Jungkook pulled away, climbing back up over me and lightly slapping my breasts.

“Now, how about you open that mouth and let me fuck it?”

Yoongi snorted from behind us and Jungkook glared at the phone before glaring at me again.

“Well?”

“You want to know how hard I can bite?” I said sharply, the pleasure ebbing away into nothing and resentment taking it place, the momentarily physicality of the situation fading and the reminder of who he was and who I was entering my sex addled brain.

“No.. You’re right…. But you know what, I’m not feeling it anymore. I was right.. you really aren’t qualified to be my whore. Your body…it’s frigid like a fucking popsicle…such a fucking turn off. ” He reached over and hung up on the phone.

“Now…”he whispered, leaning in closer and I yelped, when his fingers closed over my throat..” Shut your mouth and take what I give you like a grateful bitch.”

I swallowed when he pushed into me again, his pace steady as he fucked into me, eyes closed and I realized that he was almost fully dressed having just unbuttoned himself enough to get his cock out.

When he stiffened, spilling into me his eyes blew open and he locked eyes with me, wide eyed and for one horrible second he looked young and vulnerable and hurt.

I blinked as he pulled out, the sticky warm mess of his cum dripping down my inner thighs and onto the sheets.

“Well, that was much worse than I thought it would be.” He said and I stayed on the bed as he grabbed his phone and buttoned himself back up.

He smirked at me and then reached into his pocket.

I quickly pulled myself together, ignoring the aches and pains and getting to my knees before reaching for my dress on the bed. it was kind of pointless because I still had Hoseok’s shirt on and I wasn’t going to take that off in front of Jungkook.

“Well, I’m a man of my word , Elena so…here you go..just as we discussed.” He tossed a coin on the bed and I stared at the engraved 500 on the shiny surface, feeling my rage swell inside me.

“If you still want to work out a payment plan for your sister’s bills …. Why don’t you come to my office tomorrow?” He tossed his card on the bed before moving away to the door.

Fucking bastard.

Author’s note : My whole life is filled with regrets .

#jungkook smut #bts smut #ts fics #jungkook fics #bts fanfic #jungkook mafia au #bts mafia au

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