#sex negative

[aro-bird]

Liking or disliking sex and/or romance should never be the litmus test that determines someone's intellect, morality, and value. Liking or disliking sex and/or romance is simply a neutral thing and should not determine what your worth is as a person.

You are allowed to like or dislike sex and/or romance as long as you don't shame others who hold a different opinion and as long as you're not forcing these things on people who had not given you consent.

The ability to pursue any romantic and/or sexual activity and relationship is inseparable to the ability to create boundaries for your own safety and vice versa.

Your actions should not trample on the rights of others and that includes forcing romantic and sexual acts on someone as well as forcing romantic and sex negative resistance against another person.

#mayaposts #sex positive #sex favorable #sex repulsed #sex negative #romance positive #romance favorable #romance repulsed #romance negative #aromantic #asexual #arospec #acespec #aromantic asexual #aroace #aroacespec

[airlealilac]

I just want to look socially attractive and sexually repulsive.

#asexuality #asexual #sex repulsed #asexuel #sex negative #agender #nonbinary #non gender conforming #aroace

[aroaceconfessions]

Just to clarify:

Sex-negative = against people having as much or as little sex as they want, against people having whatever kind of sex they want, against open discussions about sex

Sex-repulsed = personal discomfort or dislike towards sex

The first one is political and the second one is personal. Being sex-repulsed is no excuse for being sex-negative.

Submitted April 17, 2023

#asexual #ace #aspec #acespec #sex repulsed #sex negative #sex negativity

[yagikidd57]

People need to stop judging sex repulsed ace spec people. Everyone is entitled to their feelings. You also have to remember people may feel this way about sex for a reason. Examples include:

-being sex repulsed may be a way to cope with sexually tr*uma

-they may feel tired of sex being shoved down their throat, being sexualized & over-sexualization in general (people with the “sex is everything” attitude are annoying. Also ppl are sexualizing children TV shows too🤢😒)

-they may have had a bad sexual experience. maybe they had sex because of societal expectations and not because they were ready, bad sex or have experienced dyspareunia.

-they may just be grossed out by it. (that’s okay too because everyone is different & are entitled to feel that way)

#sex repulsed #sexuality #sex negative #lgbtqia+ #asexuality #asexual #asexuality is valid #ace community #ace space #lgbtqia #lgbtqia community #lgbtqia+ community #queer community #acespec #sex education

[pinkprincessmisandry]

I think we should restigmatize sex. But only for straight men. I personally should be allowed to have the nastiest horniest bestest sex imaginable and talk about it openly without feeling any shame. But if a straight man so much as LOOKS at a woman he should be immediately racked with guilt and go repent for his sins. Hope this helps

#misandry is so important to me #lesbian #lesbian nsft #sex positive #sex negative #sex negativity

[allopropaganda]

“Asexuals are scared of sex”

Is the same flavor as

“All bisexuals are sex addicts”

#it’s the #truth #a spec #asexual #sex positive #sex negative #sex favorable

[saffigon]

hi, how do you tell the difference between sex/romance negativity and extreme repulsion? like is there a difference between "people should keep that to themself" and "people shouldn't do that at all"?

Hi sorry I'm just getting to this now, I needed to do a lot of thinking to properly word, and also I am. a busy man. BUT here ya go

Sex and Romance Negativity is categorized as a negative look at sex and romance as a whole. This applies to viewing them as negative for society, usually from a moral high ground. Things like "Sex should only be for reproduction" "Romance and romantic relationships are inherently harmful."

The main difference here between repulsion and negativity is that repulsion is boundaries in how they apply to oneself, where negativity is a broader statement of behavior for everyone.

So not wanting to engage with or interact with romance because you are repulsed would look more like distancing yourself from it or feeling personal discomfort with it. Where negativity would be actively putting down romance as a whole "Romance is bad, Romance is gross, Romance sounds like a panic attack*, etc" as broad statements without an understanding that "It is gross and uncomfortable for me, and therefore I don't want to be around it" whereas negativity would be closer to "It is gross and bad overall and I don't think anyone should have relationships." *The statement of "Romance sounds like a panic attack" are generally negative, but they can also be more of a personal view. One can experience it negatively individually, but not view it that way when it comes to others. This is more a mention of the general negative umbrella statement.

That's not to say there isn't overlap, negativity can be spurred by repulsion, but the point of negativity is that it's less of a personal boundary and more putting down the concepts as a whole.

I would say the two quotes you provided can both fall under negativity, if navigated incorrectly. The first one more borders the line; if it is navigated in the sense of "these things should not be discussed or seen in a public setting at all" that is negativity; if it is navigated in the sense of "I have boundaries about these things, and people I know breaking those boundaries is a problem, or I need to separate myself from this situation," it is less so. The other is more obviously just negativity.

#aromantic #aro #arospec #romance repulsion #romance repulsed #romance negativity #romance negative #asexual #ace #acespec #aspec #sex repulsion #sex repulsed #sex negativity #sex negative

[traceyshortfilm]

What is sex-repulsed, sex-indifferent, and sex-favorable?

Support our #Asexual short film fundraiser by contributing or reblogging the link: https://www.igg.me/at/traceyshortfilm

#asexual #asexuality #education #ace #ace pride #asexual pride #lgbtqia #lgbtqia+ #sex-repulsed #sex-indifferent #sex-favorable #sex negative #sex positive #sex neutral #sex repulsed #sex indifferent #sex favorable #lgbt #acememes #acepride #acespec #acespectrum #allies #ally #aro ace #aspec #aspec pride #asexual music #asexual awareness week #asexual reader

[inperspecter]

hnnnnnggggggasdfjkl

The people out here with the funny memes/jokes/pun blogs that I'd take memes from and would literally be comfortable showing my mother just casually mentioning kink sex out of nowhere is literally so creepy and kinda jarring.

Dollar store Bundy vibes tbh.

Like if you're down that bad hook up with someone and stfu then?

Like I literally do not fucking care, though. The amount of interest they have in sex is the amount of disinterest I have in hearing about why they like it/why they do it and they're scary and permanently blocked until the death of this website.

There's probably a good reason they're thirsting in front of God and everybody tbh.

I will absolutely twitch and tweak over the repulsion factor here.

Skeezebags aren't ever welcome here, ever.

If they're stupid enough to skitter in, may their lustful thoughts be plagued with rapid fire images of their grandmother in a string bikini.

✨🧙‍♂️

⬆️

#text post #tbh #txt post #dangerous creatures #🚩 #only sfw is allowed here #anti-nsfw #antiporn #sex negative #GTFO #inperspecter

[cazort]

I notice that a lot of people who claim to be sex positive seem to have a problem with rejecting people or asserting boundaries in a truly sex positive way, especially in situations where they feel disgust.

These situations are the ones where it is most important for us to embrace sex positivity, because they're the situations where we are most likely to send (perhaps unintentionally) a sex-negative message.

Examples of Sex-Negative Rejection:

Kinkshaming - "Eww, gross, you are into that? That's disgusting / wrong."

Person shaming - "You are attracted to me? That's gross / you are wrong for being attracted to me."

Identity shaming - "Eww, a (person of this gender / race / ethnicity / (slur for neurodivergent person) / trans person / (insert other identity here) is into me, that's disgusting / wrong."

Equating feelings with morality - "I feel uncomfortable with what this person said or did, therefore what the person did was wrong."

Feelings of discomfort are often a tip-off that someone has done something boundary-crossing, but they can also originate from cultural sex negativity and bigotry, which often gets directed at LGBTQ people, kink, neurodivergent people, and other marginalized groups.

If you want to reject people or assert boundaries in sex positive ways, you need to examine your feelings and find a way to express yourself without the sex negativity.

Sex-Positive Rejection or Boundaries: (with added optional explanation)

"I'm not into that. (If you're into it that's fine, but I'm not willing to do it with you or with anyone.)" - A simple, fine way to say no.

"I am repulsed by the thought of that / feel uncomfortable talking about it or hearing you share such thoughts. (If you're into it, I'd like you to keep those thoughts to yourself. It's fine that you brought it up this time, but don't bring it up again.)" - A way to express your feelings of discomfort without shaming the person.

"I'm sorry I'm gay / straight / asexual / I'm just not into you in that way. (but thanks for the interest or offer / best of luck finding someone you can connect with)" - You don't ever need to share anything about your sexuality when rejecting someone, but sometimes it can make it less likely the person will interpret your rejection as shaming them. Thanking the person for their interest and/or wishing them luck in seeking future connections is another way of achieving a similar effect, especially when you don't share about your sexuality (or if you are bi or pan and thus don't have this "out".)

If people are rude to you? You don't need to be nice to them. But still, you cannot be sex positive if you shame them for their kink or identity or merely their expression of interest, rather than specific examples of rudeness or boundary-crossing behavior.

Sex-Positive Ways to Call Out Rude or Inappropriate Advances:

"It's totally inappropriate for you to express your interest in me because you're my supervisor / teacher / I'm under the legal age of consent and you know it / I've already told you I'm not interested and not to ask me again / you know I'm in a monogamous relationship / you're in a monogamous relationship."

"I barely know you and it is totally inappropriate for you to make a sexually explicit comment or ask such an explicit comment of a stranger."

"I've already told you (repeatedly) that I'm not comfortable with you saying / doing / asking that, and it is completely inappropriate and rude for you to continue."

Note carefully that none of these examples shames the person for having a specific kink or for being interested in you, nor do they reference the person's identity. They are specific in identifying concrete reasons for your negative reaction so they remove all possible doubt or speculation that you might be kinkshaming or identity shaming, and they make crystal clear exactly what the person did wrong.

Note also that they do not make an appeal to emotion or imply that the person is wrong merely because you feel uncomfortable.

P.S. These are also the situations where it is totally warranted to seek external help such as friends or authority figures, to make sure you stay safe, ensure someone leaves you alone, and/or to post publicly about what happened in order to warn people about someone overstepping boundaries, harassing people, and/or seeking inappropriate connections.

It is not appropriate to post negative things about a person or speak negatively about them behind their back, merely because they were interested in you and you rejected them, and/or they expressed interest in a certain kink that you found repulsive. Again, that is sex negativity.

I hope this can help others both to learn how to assert boundaries in a sex positive way, and protect people who get subjected to sex-negative shaming, so that if people do this to you, you don't let it get to you.

#sex positive #sex negative #boundaries #communication #rejection #kinkshaming #lgbtq #feminism

[aro-bird]

While I'm here, it's also important to note that there's a difference between sex and romance repulsion from sex and romance negativity since I see so much confusion with those terms.

An individual who is sex or romance repulsed is someone who doesn't personally like or doesn't feel comfortable with participating or viewing acts that is sexual/romantic in nature because of personal repulsion.

Sex or romance negativity is a moral position wherein the sex/romance negative person believes that people who participate or view romantic or sexual activities even if it doesn't affect them in any way, shape, or form is morally wrong. In sex negativity, this could range from those who shame others for enjoying pornographic content to participating in kink, regardless if the involved parties are all consenting adults. For romance negativity, it's the shaming of others for engaging in romantic relationships or enjoying romantic media and could even lead to the pure demonization of love and romance as a whole instead of accepting these things simply as neutral concepts.

If someone's sex or romance repulsed, it doesn't automatically mean that they are sex or romance negative.

On the other end of this, romance or sex favorable is different from romance or sex positive.

An individual who is romance or sex favorable may personally be fine with participating or viewing romantic or sexual actions and may even desire these actions for their own reasons.

Someone who is romance or sex positive is an individual who is supportive with the freedom of any individual to engage in any sexual or romantic activity without shaming them for any moral failing.

An individual who is sex-repulsed can definitely be someone who is sex-positive, so is the romance-repulsed be romance-positive.

#mayaposts #romance repulsed #sex repulsed #romance negative #sex negative #romance favorable #sex favorable #romance positive #sex positive

[aroaceconfessions]

society is so weird

being ace in society is even weirder

purity culture puts celibacy on such a high pedestal and rewards people for not “giving in to temptation.” as someone who has no “temptation” to give in to, finding it easy to do this is a slippery slope to a holier-than-thou attitude about the concept (i speak from experience).

on the other hand everything in our culture is somehow at the same time so sxe obsessed that if you don’t participate in it or god forbid don’t want/like it you’re abnormal, or a child. so you amplify the childlike aspects of your personality so people will see you as such and keep the nsfw away from you (and as a “bonus” not associate you with that “icky” stuff. again, purity culture).

it’s like you have two competing dominant ideologies and doing anything, even once you deconstruct all this crap, as an ace person, makes it seem like you’re leaning into one of them instead of just.. existing

Submitted March 28, 2023

#asexual #ace #aspec #acespec #purity culture #sex negative #sex negativity #infantilization #aphobia #acephobia

[asexual-society]

Hello, I'm bisexual and trying to get an honest answer.

I'm pretty heavily in the aro/aspec community on Tumblr. Partially bc I'm low libido and was questioning asexuality in myself, mostly bc my partner is aroace and it helps me understand them better.

I see a lot of posts by aro/aspec people venting about amatonormativity, and the things they find weird or gross. Which I think is innocent enough. Although recently I've been coming across these vents where people will talk about how allos themselves are disgusting and weird. For an example, there was one talking about how allos will undress people they're attracted to in their heads. There was a specific tag saying "It's like they're violating the person in their head". For me, it was extremely hurtful, as it's part of my sexual experience to fantasize. It kind of feels like that it's not just the acts that are weird or gross to ace people, but the allo people are also perceived as gross.

I vented my frustration to my partner and they tried to explain it to me, why ace people making comments like that is okay. But I'm still confused. I feel like if there's people trying to find out other peoples' experience on asexuality, seeing comments like that could be harmful, and make them feel ashamed for their feelings.

Again, I just want to understand better. I'm willing to read links, too, if you have any.

I totally agree with you actually, I think we (as acespec people) need to be really careful about the way we talk about attraction and allosexual (especially queer allosexual) people, because there's a very slippery slope that some of those people are on and sex negativity is especially harmful within the queer community.

I've made posts before about sex negativity in the ace community which I'm sure have been lost to the sands of tumblr (will link if I find them), but I think you're completely correct, it's not true that ace people can say whatever they want about sex and sexual attraction being gross or disgusting or inherently bad or violating. There's a line between sex repulsion and sex negativity, and there's a line between "I think sex is gross so I don't want to do it" and "I think sex is gross and so are the people who have it", or "I feel uncomfortable with people fantasising about me" and "People should not have sexual fantasies about other people".

I genuinely would recommend blocking people like that, because if you are allo you're unfortunately probably not gonna change their minds and honestly, if it's a bigger blog their opinions on other important topics that they may post about are probably not going to be particularly sophisticated either.

I hope this helps, anon, and I'm sorry I've had to deal with people's ignorant takes.

- mod key

#sex negativity #sex negative #asexual #asks #mod key

[badass-at-fandoming]

Related to the last post, but putting it as a separate one because I don't want to derail it: the Ikemen MC's internalized misogyny and body shame is really starting to grate on my nerves. Sex is "naughty." Any brush of opposite sex skin warrants turning into a blushing mess. Displays of affection are "embarrassing" and "what if someone sees/hears??" Many special events center around the boyfriend wishing MC to initiate intimacy for once, instead of laying back and passively taking what they give.

Aren't you tired? Aren't you exhausted of the performance of shame and embarrassment, of being constantly uncomfortable, of resenting the animal you are? I am.

#cybird ikemen series #ikemen vampire #ikemen prince #ikemen revolution #ikemen sengoku #ikevamp #ikepri #ikerev #ikesen #text post #sex negative #misogyny #body shame #maybe I need a break from these apps

[isobug]

HQ Antiromantic and Antisexual Flag Remakes

An Aro-spec Romance-Negative/Repulsed/Adverse identity and an Ace-spec Sex-Negative/Repulsed/Adverse identity.

Made because I was doing a request and realized that these flags had some weird scanlines on some of the stripes

The two stripes before last one also had some major contrast issues for me as a half-blind person so I redid the color on the 2nd to last to be less similar while still trying to keep the original gradient

Flags were originally made by @beyond-mogai-pride-flags [ LINK ]

Should both be 5000 x 3000

#antiromantic #antisexual #romance negative #romance adverse #romance repulsed #sex negative #sex repulsed #sex adverse #arospec #aro #aromantic #acespec #ace #asexual #mogai flag #liom flag #mogai community #liom community #flag remake

[radlissa]

Thoughts on scum manifesto?

i do like it for its antisexual aspects 💘

#anon #answered ask #anti feminism #anti sexuality #conservative #exfeminist #exradfem #feminism #feminist #liberal #literature #men #politics #radblr #radical feminism #scum manifesto #sex negative #valerie solanas #values #women