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voided-selfships · 8 months

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"And the universe said I love you because you are made of love."

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♤ Hey howdy Creatures of The Void! I’m Warren! Though I also go by Charlie or Theseus. I’m your local BASTARD MUTUAL >:]!! I go by He/It!

♤ Please feel free to tag me in posts, art, or send me asks! I’m always down to clown with some new mutuals lmao- I’m trying to get better at the socializing thing too so be patient with me :V

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♤ Otherwise I cannot WAIT to see y'all on the flip side >B]

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Art Tag: #bastard.png

#whispers into the void || chatter

#screams into the void || vent

#late nights on venus || suggestive

#gushing to the moon || gushes

F/O+S/I TAGS: ON CARRD

#pinned #bastard.png #the stars || reblogs #whispers into the void || chatter #screams into the void || vent #late nights on venus || suggestive #gushing to the moon || gushes

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chubbyybunnie · 1 year

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My body makes me want to cry.

#torani singh screams into the void #torani vents #ed no sheeran #ed not ed sheeran #ed not sheeren #ed not sherran #bed tw

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pushister · 5 months

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Ok but. This. This line right here.

[Hobie Brown: I ain't even here.]

ATSV spoilers!

This is a long and cringe post and probably a very me-specific experience, but i need to vent. This is the line that almost single-handedly made me hyperfixate on both the Spiderverse movies and Hobie specifically (and later keep it as a huge special interest).

When i was watching ATSV for the first time, I already knew who was going to be my favorite, as Spiderpunk was both a very unique character and he seemed very similar to myself (with the sole exception that i am an idiot ofc). But at that moment in the movie, I actually had to stop and process because of how called out i felt. I am, and always have been, a pretty weird mix of autistic, rebelous, and not-giving-a-fuck, so naturally, as a child, when it came to school, kids' clubs, events, or really anything that i was forced to attend and didn't particularly enjoy (which was a lot of things), i appeared as a shadow, ignored basically any direction from adults that i was given and didn't communicate with anyone. Just a little kid sitting away in the corner, playing by themselves and not listening when told to participate in whatever the rest were doing. Some could say i was a "problematic child", which is probably true, and my teachers and older relatives thought so too. Sometimes people told me that i had to stop acting "like [i'm] special" and needed to be treated differently, but most times:

[Miguel O'Hara: I'm just gonna try to ignore you. I just can't. I can't even.]

This motherfucker just casually showed what i felt and how i acted for my entire life. In four seconds.

I don't think you can get any closer to a character when he shows up in the middle of the movie for like five minutes, immediately breaks all negative expectations that the other characters might've set up for him, makes you fall in love with him by being every single thing that you always wanted to be and everything that represents your freedom, and then casually brushes off some of the shitty feelings you've had about yourself for years, about being "problematic" and not fitting in, about being weird and lonely, by saying the thing that was sitting on the tip of your tongue that entire time while staying inconceivably cool.

...Ik how small all of this may seem, but. What can you do to me. I ain't even here.

#if anyone is ACTUALLY going to see this pls excuse my grammar i am not a native English speaker #...plus the internet fucked up my speaking skills more than would like to admit #atsv #across the spiderverse #spiderverse #hobie brown #hobie #spiderpunk #venting #screaming into the void #it's 5 am i don't even know if any of this makes senceb orr wha #i don't really make long posts #like ever

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jinx-blackout-84 · 8 months

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Been trying to put a finger on why the Dream situation pisses me off and I think I figured it out.

I spent nights staring at my ceiling listening to change my clothes and dreaming about a future that I'm scared I'll never get to have. I watched every single one of his videos, read the fanfiction, sang the songs, knew the memes and jokes, couldn't look at a kettle or fork or the goddamn color green without thinking about him. And yeah, maybe it was weird, but I was TWELVE and he was the first person I had ever seen in media that was like me. That couldn't sit still, that talked weird, that just didn't quite fit in. I had a community when I was watching tiktoks about him and reading countless Tumblr posts about the dsmp lore.

It was covid and I was a kid and I was lonely and I needed so badly to have a place where I didn't have to watch the walls in my room seemed to get closer every moment.

I started having panic attacks when I went out in public, the people I was friends with started to realize I wasn't normal, that full body twitches and flappy hands weren't the typical reaction to a good song or too-bright lights. I was so lonely.

And then I found Dream's videos. And they helped me have a place where I wasn't alone in my room, feeling like a crazy person for my tics and my gender.

I cared so fucking much about this guy, trusted him with that naive trust that kids have that people are telling the truth, and then he turned out to be taking advantage of that in his fans.

It really fucking sucked to find out that my idol wasn't a good person.

And I had him on a pedestal, I thought he was perfect, I would have taken a bullet for him, alright? I cared so much because he was the only person I had ever seen who was like me.

It wasn't normal. It wasn't just me being a normal fan. I was a stan, was a parasocial fan, whatever you want to call it.

Burt he didn't do anything to stop thousands of kids just like me from being parasocial, in fact he encouraged it.

It just bothers me to think that the entire time he was telling us he cared, 12 year old me was just another viewer. Not because I was just another viewer, but because he lied to me and told me I wasn't. I am fine with just being a fan, but being told that I'm important and significant by someone who has no way of caring about me really sucked. It sucked because it really felt like he cared, but I was always just another view, another like, another subscriber, commenter, buyer. Just another consumer.

I was emotionally dependent on him and he did nothing to discourage that behavior from thousands of fans and it's disgusting because now he's taking advantage of those same fans, using them for money, flirting with MINORS that have been conditioned to care about him.

And now a huge portion of my childhood, a huge portion of the happiness I got from being part of his community, feels so gross and tainted and I will never get to have that again. I will never get to have back those days where I could watch his videos and listen to his songs.

And I fucking loved the songs.

I loved the music, music has always been a huge deal for me, and I loved it.

Now every time I hear those stupid songs I'm taken back to when I was twelve, picturing high school and thinking about my friends and all of the things twelve year olds care about. And I miss it, and I miss the stupid songs, because I can't hear them the same anymore and they should be special to me. They should be honey-dipped nostalgia and now they are gross and unsettling.

It fucking sucks to see him parade around and talk about how he deserve sympathy because he is autistic, however true that may be, because I am autistic, and it's not fun. It's not just being a little too blunt or developing a little slower. Those may be symptoms, but that's not what autism is. It's sobbing in the middle of the lunch hall as a year 8 because you have the wrong number or apple slices in your lunch. Autism isn't some excuse for behaving like a manchild, is is something that has fucked up so much for my life. And he uses it for sympathy points.

It sucks because I related so much to him and now that I know who he really is, I am left to wonder if I will be like him one day.

It took a big part of my childhood that I should be able to look back on with fondness and sort of ruined the memories.

It sucks because part of me will always care so goddamn much even if he's fucking terrible. Even if I would avoid him if I saw him in public. Even if i have him blocked on all social media. Even if i threw away every fanart i drew of him and the dream hoodie i bought with my own money. Part of me wishes he would redeem himself so I could love his songs again. Even if I really wish he would just lose his platform right now and never fucking speak again, I miss my childhood so damn much.

Kinda fucked me up to have something I cared so much about sort of destroyed in front of me just because a man that I thought could do no wrong was a shitty person.

Anyways, I hope he burns.

#jinx screams into the void #Dream neg #dream situation #Vent tw

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gobblewanker · 8 months

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AI is making me so fucking sad and angry and hopeless feeling, my best coping method has been completely devalued and stolen from me and I want to punch someone. I feel like this will be the start of another huge downward spiral for humanity, because who'll bother to create when computers can "create" for you with a fraction of the time and effort? But AI can't create, only recycle, and when we stop creating it'll run out of things to recycle and that's where all of us will stagnate.

I have drawn maybe two sketches in a month, I used to draw daily and make fully rendered shit, but it's like all my passion has been sucked out of me and I have absolutely no desire to create anymore because creating seems worthless.

#not art #vent #i hate ai art #I've had to unfollow two artists I really adored already because they started posting/reblogging ai stuff #I'm sorry for going quiet so long I'm trying to get back into art but it's really fucking hard #honestly I guess there's a million contributing reasons #i hate venting publicly usually I just write notes and delete but right now I just need to scream into the void and beg someone hears

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lovesickbaker · 6 months

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What? Now, what could you even mean by thoughts about smashing that ex's of yours skull against a brick wall not being a healthy response? It's a perfectly reasonable response to her despicable behavior towards you, darling…

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snowflake-sage · 5 months

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Here’s a small animatic with crappy editing to get out a feeling

#sorry I vent here a lot #tumblr is where I scream into the void #if you hate vents I would recommend following my Twitter or insta #I only publically vent on tumblr bc it’s literally why I made a tumblr #and my friends don’t follow me on here #or the ones who do never use the app lol #art #doodle #drawing #furry #furryart #fursona #digital art #furry fandom #furry art #furry anthro #mae #vent #ventart

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maepersonal · 7 days

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the double standards are so fucking obvious

why am I not allowed to say that but they are?????

what have they done for you?????

am I not important enough just because I'm not in love with you romantically??

I guarantee you that I love you more than he does - why does its form fucking matter???????

sorry I can't relate to you in that way, but at least I give a fuck about what you're interested in

they don't even know what's going on in your life

I'm just fucking done

that's it

no more attempts at happiness from me

they all fucking fail

alllllllllll the time for him but never any for me

fuck

#/no one here #let it be known that if any aphobes make themselves known on this post I'll fucking gut you like a fish idc #I'm done #I'm fucking sick of everything #draft dump #bpd #borderline personality disorder #aroace #aromantic #asexual #aro #ace #asexuality #aromanticism #lgbtq #queer #oh mae oh my #vent post #void screaming

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applepies-and-starlight · 23 days

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Heath honestly resonates with me on a good few levels... especially after what we're learning about Canto VI

Like, i have No fucking clue how to explain it, it's just...

Blub, you want a shoulder to cry on? I get it, it's hard, and I don't think it's gonna get better anytime soon so like... wanna just wallow in the grief for a good bit? Nobody thinks too much of us anyway so screaming and crying about it is no skin off our backs...

Just like... the feeling of having so much rage, spite, and similar feelings in your heart to the point where everything's just. Numb, until something rubs you the wrong way and the next thing you know there's blood on your hands and there's someone on the floor with a bloody nose, and everyone's grappling at your arms to try and restrain you because you're a volatile pile of anger?

Yeah... yeah I understand that feeling. Waay too fucking well.

#void screaming #limbus company #heathcliff lcb #canto vi spoilers #<- kinda #mild vent #<- probably??#<- yeah it's a vent i think

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galaxywhump · 8 months

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Welp, it's been almost a month and I'm not sure how to proceed.

I've been in the whump community for over three years, during which I've made both wonderful and bad memories, and recently the latter has started to overshadow the former. I associate a lot of memories with my stories, like what was happening when I posted x chapter, and it's difficult for me to look at my writing and not remember the bad things. Maybe that's the reason why I've also been wondering if continuing my stories is worth it - I haven't given up on them, I'm still really attached to the characters and ideas, but I'm just not sure.

All these doubts and burnout might just be caused by stress as always - I'm still struggling with uni stuff and my mental health - and like I said I have some very fond memories from the community, so I'm not going to make any serious permanent decisions like leaving or abandoning my stories. I just needed to vent, I suppose. And maybe ask for advice.

#and maybe fish for attention a little cause i don't know if people still care about my writing #i have terrible imposter syndrome and it's gotten a lot worse recently #again probably because of stress #but it's been rough #yeah i just needed to scream into the void #love you guys #marti vents #marti talks

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voided-selfships · 6 months

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I am..not feeling well

#physically i am unwell #mentally i am also unwell. but this is mostly physical #ill be okay. just sucks rn :(#screams into the void || vent

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chubbyybunnie · 1 month

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Tw: insecurities, body talk, whining, venting

I get extra embarassed when I see women who have had a kid or kids that have nice bodies.

Like...wow...you gave birth and you look like that.

I have 0 kids and I look like a melting shitmoji...

I literally have no fucking excuse.

#torani singh screams into the void #torani vents #toranis rambles #obese ana #ed not sherran #ed no sheeran #ed not ed sheeran #ed not sheeren #high sw #stop binging

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iwritenarrativesandstuff · 3 months

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does anyone else have this issue where you belong to a group, you know you do, but whenever other people of that group talk about shared experiences across that group, you suddenly have the horrible and unmistakeable feeling that you are some kind of fraud? that you hear things that should promote camaraderie, but actually leave feeling less assured of your place when everyone else looks bolstered? that you need to be alone a long while to remember you belong, and feel confident enough to rejoin the group, only to sit there feeling like a hollow wax figurine, shifted and placed to sit just slightly out of line, just a little too close to the fire?

#hey maybe we’ll just pretend this is an edgy passage from a new story I’m writing. That sounds good. Damn what an edgelord am I right? Lol #vent #I’ll delete this dw. I just have no one to talk to right now. and I need it out so I can move on.#please don’t feel compelled to respond or anything. I really am just screaming into the void rn

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indigoblu2 · 3 months

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hey guys. i know most of my posts are pretty light and silly, but today i wanna talk about something serious.

I'm sure most of you know my oc/sona Scrumpy, prominent in many of my drawings over the years. They've been my main OC for years before I made my first internet account, going through a major makeover sometime a year and a half ago, where they gained their current appearance. However, there are many awful memories attached to Scrumpy's image, and that's nobody's fault but a Discord user named Chookily and mistakes I've made using Scrumpy's image. I wanna put my life as Scrumpy behind me. Also, I'm still good friends with many of the people that made being Scrumpy one of the best periods of my life. But, to quote Robert Frost, "Nothing gold can stay". Being Indigo, I'm more myself. I like being mature, and giving out advice, and doing silly roleplays, and drawing comic panels, and stealing reaction images from Willow. I never felt the obligation I felt the need to be perfect, to constantly need attention. But I need your help.

#screaming into the void #tw vent #vent post #important #pinned post #please reblog #serious post #no hate #oc #persona

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ahollowgrave · 3 months

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.

thank you to everyone who left a nice comment or DM'd me or whatever yesterday I didn't reply because I get very embarrassed when people show me compassion when I very clearly need it. But I read each one and saved them for next time and I am blowing you kisses and avoiding eye contact, you understand. depression is a known liar and you can't trust her. she is very convincing, however, and so when it gets to you please know I am there holding your hand.

#ooc #sometimes you scream into the void and people scream back that you aren't alone and you're just so shocked that you crawl into a hole #anyway #venting #depression/pmdd double whammy of 'i've never formed a meaningful connection and never will because of *me*' woof #ANYWAY I'M FINE AGAIN #the urge to make a 'lets never talk about this again' joke but there is no nobility in suffering #and i think posting on sm like we sometimes do is an ask for help and there is never shame in asking for help however you need too imo #sometimes the ask is 'please reassure me i'm not just a blank space on the wall'#(but also lets never talk of this again)#<- jokey joke see I'm fine #got some shitty news about the cost of a surgery one of our cats needs but that's ok we'll make it through #everyone say goodbye to all of al's teeth

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probablyahazard · 4 months

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the mortifying ordeal of knowing that no one will ever perceive you correctly. their expectations fit slightly too wrong, even when they come from love. like you favourite childhood tshirt you've begun to outgrow. the hem is just a little too short, the chest too tight, the sleeves leave little red lines on your arms. but you can't throw it away, it becomes a part of you. it becomes all of you

#hazardramblings #screaming into the tumblr void #trans masc #trans #trans vent #i was having thoughts at work last night can you tell

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