#re: chronic pain

[arosebyan0thername]

Hey does it ever end? Does it stop?

#personal #re: chronic pain #me sometimes: no i dont actually have chronic pain because im not literally in pain 24/7 365 there are times when im not in any pain #me literally every time i think about that: well actually. funny that you mention it. i am actually currently in pain right now. funny huh #ive been in nonstop no end back pain for one whole entire week #can i take a break? can i clock out for a 30?

[thislousytshirt]

dont feel pain when laying down except when cat lays on me. cat is its own comorbid disabilitiy

#re: chronic pain

[the-bar-sinister]

There was a certain level of pain that Karl Heisenberg was in every day of his life. It was his constant companion. As far as he knew, it was a simple fact of his being alive. It was a simple fact of what had been done to his body.

The pain waxed and waned but it never fully departed. There were herbs from Donna that helped but they dulled his mind and sent him to the land of the half dead.

Despite everything, Karl wanted to live. He wanted to live even though it hurt, even though it was hard.

He wanted to live, and he wanted to be in charge of his own life. And so he fought through the pain. He lived with the pain. He savored it. He trusted it.

Being in pain meant that he was still fighting. 

Karl Heisenberg dreamed of a body that didn't ache, and dreamed of a life where he wasn't a slave and a prisoner. But he would endure both. 

He would endure them as long as he had to. He would drink the joy in there was to be had from them, and he would come out the other side.

-

AO3 link

#karl heisenberg #whump #whump writing #chronic pain cw #resident evil #resident evil village #re8 #re village #lord heisenberg #fanfiction #fan fiction #fanfic #archive of our own

[aro-culture-is]

quick note - this blog is gonna be sparse again for at least this week. trying new medications and tbh initial side effects are not super pleasant + actual effects build up. as a result: currently as if unmedicated for mental health, with anxiety+ side effect, extra fatigue, dizziness, and fatigue. it's uh, sure something.

totally recognize that most of y'all know we're absent at times due to health things, just wanted to give a heads up that this one is at least anticipated.

#fun fact sometimes condensing meds just means poorer treatment of some conditions #this is a re-expansion + new thing #so that instead of poorly treating my mental health and using an unusually high dose SNRI for another (physical) condition #i will hopefully both be in less pain AND not depressed af AND also have an appetite again #i doubt i will be lucky and not have a fucked stomach due to meds but one can hope that an appetite will allow me to eat foods that upset #my stomach a lot less #my health is forever a massive balancing act #every time a medical thing is like 'so what meds do u take' i'm like here i wrote it down for u #and they're like 'oh. ooookay. let me just...' *five minutes of typing and clicking later* #'so! what did you come in for again? uhuh. you said you experience pain daily? with your chronic pain thing? hm. have you tried yoga?' #/gen #like. straight up every time i say 'i am in pain all the time due to fibromyalgia' they are like 'ooh studies say regular exercise helps' #and like. theoretically yes! but also. i would be lying if i said the fibromyalgia studies i've skimmed don't set off general 'bad science' #alarm bells in my brain #like... cool you performed a fibromyalgia study with... all male lab rats? mhmm? so are you aware fibromyalgia appears to occur #overwhelmingly in women? like. data seems to suggest between 70-85%? #(not that the data can't still indicate things but it certainly makes male rats a poor choice of model for tests on it) #also just... idk i've looked at some metaanalysis and been like 'okay cool theory and for all i know about human bio or bio in general that #sounds more or less correct BUT. you never discussed that one study on this subject that did NOT support your conclusion. #and that's 1) interesting when it was the most diverse group of subjects and the exceptions often teach just as much as the 'rule' #2) just shitty science. tell me how your theory is still credible when some evidence doesn't fit the model. #like... 'given that all other studies were primarily conducted on white american women in their 30s to 40s it is possible that this model #only explains (the early effects of fibro since that's a typical onset period) / (a possible genetic link primarily found in white women) / #(a possible sign of bias in diagnosis that demonstrates the possibility that there are different causes) / combinations of all of those #like... idk a paper that just throws out things that don't support it is a pretty big red flag #it doesn't mean the conclusion is entirely incorrect but it is often important to understand the context in which it applies #like... it's very easy to jump to an incorrect conclusion if you used something in the wrong context #ie: thumbs up is a good job / positive thing in a lot of western civilizations. teenage kee once went to china and discovered it to be #neutral to offensive in many areas outside of major tourist locations that were used to it #anyways i gotta sleep

[not-poignant]

Health update!

So for those following health stuff, I got some great news today. I don't have COPD or Pulmonary Hypertension.

I did find out that my lungs are smaller than the average population (maybe about 90% the size) so they're working a bit harder than everyone else's and that's part of why I've been prone to pneumonia (which I started getting as a teen) and chronic bronchitis.

I also have a new trial medication to start, and some bloodtests to get. But my lungs overall are doing really well and I don't have to see the lung specialist again unless things get suddenly worse.

We've been staring down a possible diagnosis that would give me 2-5 years left to live for 6 months now, and getting a reprieve has been a huge relief and in its own way kind of exhausting.

But good good good news, and that makes me super happy <333

#personal #health stuff #cw chronic illness #still have all the other stuff #he asked me if i wanted a follow up re: the prescribed medicine #and i kind of said that while he was amazing #i do not want more specialists in the roster #i already have to see an endocrinologist #rheumatologist #orofacial pain specialist #psychiatrist #and more on a regular / semi-regular basis and it's like i'm good #how about we leave that there lol

[gvmdisease]

anyone have tips on helping full body pain??? im told ot just get over it and take meds but i cant bc of my liver and im in too much pain to forget about it but i also need to get my room clean and its not helping the pain but if its not clean by tonight my parents are gonna be so mad so im not sure what to do

#i hate chronic pain #fuck chronic pain #chronic pain #also fatigue is so bad today #but its fine i can push myself #it might suck the res tof the week #but its fine #ill live ig

[highlifeboat]

Convinced Jill Valentine is indestructible actually.

#she is going to have chronic pain the rest of her life goddamn #re 3 has been a blast haha #rambles #like i know leon gets it bad but girl is going THROUGH IT

[icewindandboringhorror]

Bad news, got back from the vet and my beautiful baby son is going to have to be put down soon, probably tomorrow or the next day, so send him best of wishes for his next few days~ Luckily, he's actually not in a lot of pain (for now, hopefully he won't be) and is acting pretty normal, so I'm hoping he won't suffer at all and everything will be peaceful for him.

#pet death tw #death mention #let me know if I need any other tags #I would post something to help pay for his euthanasia expenses or etc. but I don't know of any secure methods #since I don't know much about stuff like that. I've heard that like on paypal and ebay and stuff people can still get your real name #and some information from their payment receipts or whatever sutff like that. thats part of why I've held off on selling clothes and sculpt #res for so long is trying to find a way to do it that's the most safe. aside from literall yhaving to start an llc and open a business bank #account and run everything on an entirely sepreate thing just so it has no association with my name and etc. #and obviouskly I don't feel like figuring out all of that stuff right now lol #I am busy just trying to make my beautiful meatloaf son comfortable and spend some time with him whilst I can #It's sad. but I'm glad the issues were caught before he was in terrible pain or anything. So suprisingly it was actually a pretty easy #decision. I would rather him go out while he's feeling okay and relatively content then wait until he's in severe #pain or extremely lethargic or etc. So it seems all very sudden but . It's better that way for him. #anyway #of COURSE this has to happen during a heat wave also.. hhrgghhh... #more fuel for my vendetta against summer lol.. Not that it's the season's fault but. something bad happening in the winter #vs. seomthing bad happening in the summer which just adds an extra layer of 'oh yeah on top of everything else #you're going to be sweating and nauseous and chronically uncomfortable!' is like.. >:T #Also for him. part of the issue is lung cancer which has spread and caused a bunch of fluid to build up in his stomach (which is what I #noticed. even though he's acting perfectly fine and normal his stomach was weird and bloated suddenly) #but if part of the problem is his lungs (which look absolutely crazy on xray) then him breathing in hot shitty thick air is definitely #not as comfortable as if he were able to be nice and cool and snuggled in some blankets. etc. etc. #ANYWAY ghhb... send him much luck and positivity!! Really hoping he can make it through the next day or so without #taking a turn for the worst. So hopeing for a peaceful quiet exit and not like tramatic sudden things. etc. etc. #cross your fingers pray to your gods whisper to the night sky so on and so forth. whatever you do that's meaningful to you.

[magpiethepunkfairy]

Remaking a post so it's here on my main account

Responding to @goblintoothfairy on a post I made

This gave me a lot of thoughts and feelings I am so sorry for a very long post

I wanna answer your question but it's gonna be long and I wanted it to be it's own thing and not potentially get lost in the void

It's complicated honestly

And it's also something that for me is directly tied to both my physical and mental health

I can't give any kinda general or blanket advice cause it was kinda the perfect storm for me, a lot of different things changed and fell into place

I got outta school, I was able to get out of the physical environment, the bright lights and loud noise and layered smells, and the social environment, to many people, passive aggressive peers And teachers, complicated social things and shitty friend groups. I'm able to set my own schedule and better control the energy I'm using each day

I got out of a toxic and shitty relationship, we were not good for each other, I can be a lot because of my physical and mental health and he couldn't handle it and instead of be honest about it he took it out on me.

I got back into therapy and started taking a really cool self defense class. My therapist is really cool and he's also an instructor for the class

They push me to challenge some of the things I was telling myself, push me to defend and also to just Have boundaries. Teach me to stick to my words and actions, show me I'm capable of more then I allow myself to think.

But they also except and understand my limits, physical what I'm able to do and also just when I'm not comfortable with something, they encourage me when I tell them no I can't/won't/don't Want to do something

And through all of this I started internalizing things, came to terms with parts of my identity as a queer person more but also as someone who's neurodivergent and disabled

I started paying attention to how I was really using my energy and if I was really ok with it

I decided I was worth more then the things I'd let people and Myself put me through

I decided I deserve to be myself and that if the people currently in my life couldn't handle it they weren't worth dissolving myself for

And this last part is extremely important to me

I am Still working on it, still going through the motions of catching myself in negative loops and changing it

I still have bad days, I still really struggle sometimes

I'm also realizing that's ok, that I'm going to still struggle

That I might always struggle, and even that's ok

I'm working on focusing on being kind instead of nice

To myself and others

I give myself space to have my negative thoughts and feelings, I still get stuck in them sometimes

But I feel them, and then I go talk to my mom, or open a window, or eat a snack

It's a long hard process, and it will be a life long one for me

I'm currently working on just Talking to my friends more, my mind convinces me I'll ruin it, that they hate me, it still wins the battle most days

But I'm working through it, getting better most days

I'm no keeping quiet about things I care about and believe in for other people's comfort

And it honestly has Nothing to do with other people and everything to do with me working towards being the person I want to be

I hope this helps, and if it doesn't that's ok, I really don't think there's a one size fits all way to go about this

Another important thing, it's been something I've been actively working on in some form or another for two years now, and I still have so much more work to do

#im so sorry to re make a whole big thing #ive been kinda obsessively sorting and un sorting some of my blogs #i think imma just delete my other ones #so ill STOP doing this lol #queer ramblings #queer #nonbinary #ramblings #punk #trans #gender noncomformity #actually adhd #actually autistic #anxitey #mental health #fibromyalgia #pots syndrome #chronic pain #chronic illness #they/them #it its #long post #text

[soldier-poet-king]

Spent so long trying to separate my brain from the vague and undefined essence of My Being to survive the Mental Illness that I basically re-enacted Gnosticism 2.0 and not to be like, that's why my OCD emerged later than my more common flavoured generalized anxiety& chronic depression Brainrot, but it definitely Did Not Help. And now that I am (sometimes) at peace with my mind and given that I am no longer spending every waking moment trying to stay alive I have time to reflect on the lasting body-mind-soul division that I've created for myself and like. It fuckin sucks. I hate the body. I hate that I hate the body and being an incarnate creature. But also. It's so bad wrong awful. And tbh I still hate the mind a lot many days too!

#anyway bryn ur post is SO right and u are as always. correct #i just didnt wanna hijack it w rambles #but yeah.theee mental illness has done a number on me in many ways #but yeah the uh. body. we hate to see it. hate to have it. #smtn smthn tmg hebrews 11.40 i will get my perfect body back someday #if not by faith then by the sword im going to be restored. vibe. of it qll #also in the sparrow 2 emiliom talks abt this. and why he cant just get over what happened to him physically #because it was also a repeated assault of his soul #like yeah theres a lot of dynamics there re. divine abandonment and assault. but hes basically right #viz. my own hm horrible terrible no good very bad existence #sometimes i am terrified of eternity not for the usual reasons (im always terrified for those reasons its the ocd and existentialism) #but also for the like. physical resurrection??? in my religion??? fuck no. i DONT want that #i have to be stuck in this stupid ass form forever? #i cant even *** to get out of it ITS FOREVER #i want. to be a genderless shapeless benevolent void. maybe i can take on physical form when i want need #like the angels. i dont want THIS #anyway yeah yeah I'm trying but it just keeps getting harder #nothing fits right or looks right and im at the mercy of genetics giving me a body i dont want #and I cant even just sweat it out in agony bc oh boy look! youve now developed chronic joint pain TOO #if i cant look like i do in my mind i might as well be strong and powerful #but oh no. bitch is gonna get SO many physical ailments too #I DON'T WANNA DIE BUT I DONT WANNA LIVE LIKE THIS #franposting #brought to u by. button up shirt didnt sit right today. hips too thick for anything. have a whole extra goddam organ in my stomach #which i hate and do not want or need #etc etc etc

[otterjpg]

as a gay trans man i love the term pussyboy for many reasons, but bc of chronic pain i dont actually use mine and when i go for a lower surgery i'll prob get rid so im working on alternatives

defunctpussyboy

expussyboy

depussyedboy

#no unsolicited advice re chronic pain please

[boostrific]

#closing my eyes forever #i really wish they did more with this rather than immediately writing off all his disabilities Lol #like theres something there re: how much value booster puts into his body and like. if im real I probably would have minded it less if they #at least built on that when making booster seek the monarch out but as it stands iy just feels like they got tired of having booster like #this. Sigh #kicking rocks #its okay. in my minds eye he still has leftover chronic pains / parts he recovered that just dont function like it used to (i.e his arm)

[galpalaven]

I’m so tired of being in pain. Absolutely sick of it. Extremely sick of the new trend of shivering in pain trying to get out of bed. Or get into bed. Or even getting off the couch. My muscles feel like they’re going to give way from overuse any second. It’s unreal

#fibromyalgia #chronic pain #not to mention the joint swelling now that RA has re entered the chat

[viv-weylin]

Ram using modern day mobility aids.

#ram #rezero #re:zero #re zero #she uses a wheelchair on her bad chronic pain/fatigue days. she uses crutches when its not too bad. she uses a cane around the mansion #shes disabled and she cant do much but shes still loved so much and that makes me so happy. she cant clean she cant cook #but she can do what she does best. shes good company ( #shes just like me fr

[maidofmetal]

i have a tear in my labrum in my hip 🫠🖤

#metal speaks #chronic pain #chronic injury that’s a thing right #i just keep getting injured #i for sure re injured my knee #and i’m too chicken to call my knee surgeon 😵‍💫

[corvidaedream]

i can't wait until i have new (and fewer) housemates bc six people who found each other on craigslist and four cats is simply too many and im losing my mind

#messages from the ouija board #im also just sick of having to re-explain constantly to two of them that im chronically ill #like theyre like 'if u really respected us u would try harder to get through it' #but every time im like 'hey i know im not very organized and i have a hard time cleaning bc im in pain. #i think itd be helpful if we got a cleaning service even just monthly so that im not causing myself pain but things are still clean' #and they shut it down like 'no thats bougie shit and i dont want strangers in my house' like idk man im trying to have solutions #but the only solution they want is for me to Stop Being Sick