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#or those who are of a certain level of Suffering

absentlyabbie · 1 year

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don't be afraid of buying things that make your life easier. don't talk yourself out of it, beat yourself up for being "lazy", or shame yourself for not being able to do things the "right" way so you don't deserve to try it a different way.

if there's a thing out there that can make something faster, more bearable, less painful, more tolerable, anything like that at all, and you can afford it? you have the right, you deserve it, and you should do it.

i've stuck for the last several years with exclusively those detachable sprayer showerheads, because i need to be able to sit down in the bath and it makes the entire operation easier, so i'm less likely to risk a concussion or pass out or wobble and slip.

for the last few years, i've been using one with a little powerwash spray setting and i use it before and after every shower and it keeps my tub and shower cleaner so much longer, which is great because i hate cleaning the bath and can put it off for months, and scrubbing kills my shoulders.

sometimes, whether it's the executive dysfunction, or the depression, or knowing that i become entirely detached from the concept of time when in the shower, if i can't bring myself to get in the damn thing and do a full-blown shower, and i know i'd just be uncomfortable and not clean and still keep putting it off (because i can easily lose well over an hour once in there), i will kneel on my (cushy, quick-dry, memory foam) bathroom mat beside the tub and lean over it to wash my hair and face and maybe soap up to my shoulders. then later when it feels like a way more manageable and shorter task i can do a quick scrub and rinse.

i've bought cbd for when my joint pain makes sleeping otherwise impossible (even though it's expensive) and a work desk that has expandable legs to be a bed desk if i ever need to work sick (i'm lucky to be remote since my job change).

i've bought the screw-top, 40oz, insulated mugs and extra long plastic straws (do not @ me) and the pop-bottom giant cube ice trays all because every one of those helps ensure i drink more water every day (and so does the faucet-mounted water filter).

i buy specific individual snacks that require little to no prep so even when the execution of making a sandwich is Too Damn Much, i can still make myself do some calorie intake.

i talked myself into a cushioned mattress topper to relieve my spine and because it's way cheaper than a new mattress. i bought blackout curtains for our old apartment because the outdoor lights were insanely bright at all hours and made sleep even more elusive.

i've purchased slip on-only shoes or no-tie laces because i hate tying shoelace knots, my hands are less dexterous than ever (and hurt), and because i struggle with time management and it's one small thing to shave off just a little more time so i'm a little less late.

i didn't buy all of these things all at once, definitely. i am, sadly, made of meat and not money.

but i started budgeting, slowly, more and more of whatever amount of disposable income i had after bills towards "thing to make life suck less and not be so hard" and i can't regret it in the least.

i deserve not only small comforts and joys, but also less pain and difficulty, and ways to make challenging parts of life a little more within my reach with not quite as much effort.

so do you.

#chronic illness #disability #but this is not just for disabled people #or those who are of a certain level of Suffering #so don't go telling yourself 'oh well this doesn't apply to me because i'm SUPPOSED to have no issue'#fuck 'supposed to'#reaching for the right tool for the job of living decently and in relative comfort and happiness is not failure it's good sense

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jkslipppiercing · 3 months

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Never Been A Friend | Part 1 | Jeon Jk

♧ synopsis: Sneaky glances across the room weighed with a dozen different meanings left to be unsaid; confusion, desire, lust. He was never a friend, was he?

♧ pairing: brother's bsf!jk, bratty!reader.

♧ warnings: y/n is too drunk to form a sentence, jungkook loves cursing, jungkook is jealous out of his mind, kinda enemies but not really, jungkook calls y/n a brat that he cant stand, someone calls y/n a slut, and that's all i can remember 😙

♧ WC: 1.6K

♧ a/n: hello loves! wrote this in one sitting and it's barely edited, but the intention is there lmao i love you all so much please enjoy! dont hesitate to tell me what you think <3 im like the no.1 supporter for constructive criticism lol okay thank you byeeeee

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JK's POV

She whines,

Throws tantrums,

Acts like a goddamn brat for the sake of being annoying,

And I still want her lips around my cock.

Why?

That goes beyond the fucking level of my emotional understanding.

I want her wrapped around my finger. I want her to get on her fucking knees and apologize for all the turbulent feelings she makes me suffer by.

She ruined my night.

I was fucking.

Blowing a girl's back just to lay off some steam. Get the stress of the college life off my shoulders.

But then, she just had to cock-block me.

My best friend’s sister.

Speaking of the twat, he dared to interrupt my one night stand for the sake of his bratty sister.

Usually, I love brats.

My type.

They make sex enjoyable. All the more pleasurable when they try to resist.

Keyword: try.

Because I know for a damn straight fact when a girl wants to be disciplined.

Fucked right and put in her place.

Reminds me of her. Y/L/N Y/N.

Except for one thing, though- she makes my fucking insides churn in all uncomfortable ways.

She doesn’t have a bratty attitude, the bitch has a bratty personality.

Yes, she is indeed a bitch. I can't stand a girl who's always annoying just because she feels like it. She'd never had a valid reason to hate me, and neither did I.

When I first met her, I mean.

She was laughing with her brother having breakfast one time when I came out of my room for painkillers and a glass of water.

Her brother and I were both freshmen in need of a dorm, and we agreed on splitting the rent once in a frat party.

Yes... we were both strangers to each other, but we clicked.

Met through mutuals, and our vibes matched. After living with each other for over six months now, we've grown pretty close.

He's cool, agreed on basic rules like who does the laundry or dishes, helped with assignments, and was always there when needed.

He's a friend. A close one.

A tolerable one.

That can't be said about a certain someone, though.

She scowled at me that day and later told me she didn't like my vibe when I confronted her about it.

Bullshit.

And yet, she's the reason I left a naked girl in my bed and came to this godforsaken club in the first place.

Her brother is here, too, which is why he called me to come pick her up. Said something about her being drunk, and since he had taken a shot or two as well, he couldn't take her home himself.

Or he just didn't want to, because he was also getting laid tonight.

That's proven to be right when I see him making out with a girl near the bathrooms.

His hands grope her all over as she arches into him, which is enough to make me look away.

Sly motherfucker.

Casting my vision toward the main dance floor, I scan the crowd for a short brunette with soft features.

Annoyingly soft features.

So soft that I want to corrupt her. Tear the bratty exterior and dig through the filthy dark side on the inside.

But those features aren't the only things that infuriate the hell out of me.

It's her innocence.

How can a brat be innocent, you may ask?

When my gaze lands on her, my jaw tenses in annoyance.

She sways her hips sensually, eyes closed and mouth open as she slides her hands down her body to a seductive beat following her movements.

I follow the action, eyes unable to tear away from her figure.

Her fingers skim over her neck down to her breasts and then further, the lightness she seems to be handling her body with attending to a grace she always breathed by.

Fuck, I hate this woman.

Hate everything about her.

How she moves.

How she walks.

How she fucking talks.

Runs her mouth like a brat who needs to be handled.

No- not like- is.

She is a brat.

A brat who's oblivious to all the eyes she's attracting.

Including mine.

Fuck.

Her dancing resumes as her eyes stay closed, feeling every beat.

She's enjoying herself.

Not for long.

I school my expression- which had turned into a scowl the moment I set my eyes on her- and begin my stride towards her.

I spot a man doing the same, but she's absolutely mind-numb as she continues to dance with her damn eyes closed.

I was irritated, but now I'm literally fed up.

He's a couple inches shorter than me, wearing a white tee and skinny ripped jeans.

Not to mention, his hair is slicked back by a disgusting amount of hair gel.

Ew.

He approaches Y/N with predatory eyes and a shit eating grin, his gaze set straight on her perky ass.

Which is just barely covered by the tight little dress she's wearing, inching higher and higher up her thighs as we speak.

My steps quicken when I see him reach out, apparently intending to slap her ass.

My blood boils.

White noise drowns out all available access to the outside world as I break out into a jog and reach her just in time.

My hand swiftly slides onto her tiny waist, and I glare at the man whose shit-eating grin is now gone, replaced with confusion.

Y/N's eyes stay closed as she giggles, and it's now I notice how drunk she is.

Bright crimson tints her cheeks and her breath smells of strong tequila, obviously from having taken too many shots.

Isn't she here with friends?

How could they leave her alone like this?

Her brother's here. Her brother is here.

My breath turns heavy, my heartbeat quickening. I have to stop myself from punching the douchebag in front of me into fucking oblivion because I don't know if i'll ever stop once I start.

Fuck.

I try to focus on anything besides her frame that's barely hanging onto me, all the exhaustion from her dancing catching up to her as she fights to keep her eyes open.

Why the fuck is she here all alone? Why did they- whoever she's here with, except her brother- leave her here like this?

Like she's not even aware of where she is.

Like she's not sober enough to be responsible.

Like she's not fucking strong enough to defend herself if anything happened to her.

I might punch a wall.

My grip tightens around her waist, which makes her drowsily lift her head to stare up at me.

She's still shorter than me with heels on, enough to put her neck in an uncomfortable position whenever she looks up at me.

It's adorable.

But that's none of my concerns as the slimy fuck keeps undressing her with his eyes. Makes me want to claw them out with my bare hands.

Repress.

"Wha..." She starts, growing more and more confused as she tries to wrap her head around where the hell she is. "Jungkook? What are you..."

She trails off into a mindfuck, allowing me to set my full focus on the man still staring between us with wariness.

My gaze hasn't worn off him since I saw him fucking reach for her ass, which makes me want to bash his head against the wall.

My breathing turns heavy again.

Repress.

"Off-limits." I bite out with enough to control to shock myself. I'm even more surprised that this motherfucker is still breathing.

His eyes thin into slits as he eyes me suspiciously. "I haven't seen you here the last couple of hours. Thought her sexy ass came alone." His eyes skim over her body, gaze lingering longer than necessary on her breasts.

Guess someone's leaving with no limbs tonight.

"You thought wrong." It takes almost all the last bits of my control to reply with that before I start turning around to leave, Y/N almost falling asleep on my arm.

She clutches the hem of my shirt with a weak grip, like a toddler would its mom.

If I couldn't get here in time, what would've happened?

I catch myself before I overthink it. If I did, I'm afraid I might commit a crime tonight. One of shameless blood and murder-

Repress.

My back is turned to him when I hear a low whistle, which makes me pause, angry enough for my limbs to shake with adrenaline.

"You know, It's often rare for a slut with such a sweet ass to be out here all alone wearing that. Almost like she's begging for a cock-"

The words are barely out of his mouth before my fist connects with his face. The force of my blow got him on the floor, nose fucked and bleeding. Might be broken.

Good. Bare minimum.

I almost straddle him and punch him to his fucking fortunate death.

Almost.

But I have to get Y/N home.

I can't stand this anymore.

I can't stand her anymore.

Coming here alone? Dressed like that?

I mean yes, she did come here with her idiot brother who thinks with his dick, but he's nowhere to be found.

How can someone be so nonchalant to just leave his sister here all alone?

I'm so goddamn confused.

And infuriated.

And...angry.

Fucking fuck.

I need to get her the fuck out of here before i lose my fucking mind.

Fuck me.

The punch I just delivered did little to satiate my thirst for this slimy fucker's blood.

But again, Y/N's more important.

I turn, my panic spiking so high it reaches levels it had never before when I find Y/N out of my sight.

My breathing starts to go abnormal for the nth time this night.

I might develop heart problems.

A sigh leaves my mouth when I spot her by the bars, trying to convince the bartender to give her another shot. Relief floods my system, and my breaths regulate.

I send a quick text the girl- who i already forgot the name of- and tell her to head home. She sends a crying emoji back but agrees nonetheless, telling me to call her back when everything is sorted out on my end.

I have other things to care for.

Or I guess, in this case, a certain person to tend to.

God, It's gonna be a long night.

@hoseokteardrop @nochuel @kaitieskidmore97 @nays2112 @jksoftii @yu-justme @meadow-in-spring @bunnykoos @looneybleus @fushigurosdarling @alpha-mommy69 @junecat18 @xjiminsthighsx @tanniesdolls @winterbeartaehyungbestboy @whoa-jo @ahgasegotarmy116 @jksusawife @frgetmenotes @baechugff @partyparty-yah @army130613210521 @drugerlime @allisonstone @hopekive @llallaaa @tarahardcore @hopetookmysoul @betysotelo18 @harmonic55 @ecrvea @awesomebabyyoda @peterstarkchrishiddleston @pinkrockstar19 @sweetestseoul @luv--youu @mochminnie @coletaehyung @whitelies2248-blog @ash07128 @bangtans-momma @yourbobaeyestell

did you like it 👀

@laylasbunbunny @btsnpniff @olimpiiaa @caro134340lina @ohsweetmimosa @lovingkoalaface @httpjeonlicious @t-alyssa-vvv-blog

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cyb0rs · 11 months

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Astrology Observations ✩°｡⋆⸜ 🎧✮

TW: ED & BODY DYSMORPHIA

🍠 Capricorn/Saturn natives tend to age backwards. The type to look 40 at 13 and 13 at 40.

🍠 Pisces placements (excluding pisces suns) have this christ-like sort of kindness to them. *someone trips and falls in front of people* pisces placements: *not being able to stop feeling soooo bad for that person forever*

🍠 Never seen someone edgier than scorpios who have gemini placements. They’re so annoying bc they look cool and are actually cool it’s not just a facade.

🍠Venus-Saturn aspects in a natal chart not only do they indicate the native’s inclination to attract older partners but it also indicates extreme level of loyalty in the native’s nature

🍠Venus-Jupiter in natal chart indicates aging backwards. Esp Venus Sq. Jupiter that is aging like fine wine so to say. Halle berry has this aspect in her chart.

🍠Again I do not condone medically diagnosing people via their birth chart. However, I have noticed a pattern in people who seem to suffer from eating disorders in one way or another. They usually seem to have prominent Saturnian influence in their chart such as Saturn ruled moons in that they’re usually quite disciplined to a fault if they put their mind to achieve a certain goal and in this case weight loss it’s hard to sway them and convince them to truly indulge from time to time, they practice extreme self control when it comes to their diet. Cap asc, asc-saturn, asc-neptune and harsh neptunian aspects (illusion) can also indicate body dysmorphia in a native’s chart hence extreme dieting or worse starvation. Sometimes Pluto can also have the same effect since the planet rules transformation especially if it aspects the ascendant in that people could notice extreme weight loss transformation in people who have plutonian aspects. Pluto aspecting Saturn or Uranus can also indicate sudden weight loss as well and they usually tend to be extreme like how celebs lose insane amount of weight in such a short time for a movie role or a red carpet event. E.g., Matthew McConaughey, Anne Hathaway, Chris Hemsworth, Hilary Swank and so many others unfortunately.

🍠 Speaking of body dysmorphia we can also notice a pattern in celebs who are obsessed with cosmetic procedures/surgeries in that they have at least one or two of the above aspects. E.g., Kylie Jenner, Ariana Grande, Marilyn Monroe, Bella Hadid and the list goes on.

🍠 After researching ED and body dysmorphia in those celebs' charts, I observed that many of them have Sagittarius somewhere in their charts. Sagittarius placements could signify recklessness and a "yolo" attitude that leads to risky life choices and potentially jeopardizing their well-being.

🍠Individuals with prominent scorpio placements/pluto dom individuals are seriously sexy it’s not a stereotype it’s true ugghhh.

🍠Cancer ascendant individuals tend to look like they’re on the verge of tears even when they’re fine.

🍠Mercurial suns with pisces moon are usually musicially inclined and they are innovative in their artistic pursuits examples of artists with these placements are: Kanye West, Michael Jackson, and Prince.

🍠I always find a sun-pluto aspect in superstars’ natal charts and celebs such as Beyonce, Michael Jackson and Elvis Presley have this aspect. It indicates having a huge following and having a powerful impact on the masses.

Edit: oh my god🤦🏻‍♀️ the first and the fifth astro observations could have been in one bullet point. i’m sorry, i was exhausted making this one.

If you liked this post and want a reading with me you can check my pinned post to book your reading 🐩 I do natal and synastry readings for now <3

#astro observations #astrology #astrology observations #gemini #pisces #zodiac signs #aspects #saturn #asc-saturn aspects #capricorn rising #scorpio #pluto #scoprio placements

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vidavalor · 7 months

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This is the face of an angel who just realized that his oppressors are afraid of him and his friends because, together, they are a force that threatens the regime.

This is the face of an angel that just realized all of this Metatron nonsense is to separate them and keep him-- the best strategist-- from starting a revolution. If they are split up, The Second Coming goes off without a hitch... but if Aziraphale unites them, then Heaven will fall. Crowley & Aziraphale alone are enough trouble together to stop Armageddon. Crowley & Aziraphale with the eons-long leaders and commanders of Heaven and Hell in Gabriel and Beezelbub, though? That is a coup.

How little would it take to overthrow it all at this point? How long until it's Crowley & Aziraphale & Gabriel & Beez... & Muriel & Eric & Furfur? How til they get Michael and Dagon on their side? How long until it's actually most of the demons and a sizable portion of the angels teaming up against what's left of Heaven?

Give Me Coffee or Give Me Death. Aziraphale took the coffee. The Metatron thinks it means subservience. He thinks it means he's tricked Aziraphale and that he's won and he was almost right, so is the level of trauma these beings have suffered. He didn't know, though, that coffee is already coded as liberty. He handed Aziraphale a cup of symbolic freedom and didn't realize how so very true that was going to be. Just like a certain empire once did when they gave some of their people the option to form some colonies, thinking that the empire would always remain in control, and now we call those colonies not part of Great Britain but The United States of America.

"Out of his mouth go burning lamps, and sparks leap out"-- the Job quote on the matchbox. The matchbox containing the fly, containing Gabriel via Beez. Out of Gabriel's mouth goes burning lamps-- Gabriel lights the way. He's the path forward. He is first shots fired in the rebellion...

...and sparks leap out.

Some Boston Tea Party stuff afoot, you guys.

That is the face of an angel that just realized that he and Crowley were both wrong: the solution isn't running away but it's also not taking over a broken system that doesn't want to be fixed... it's fanning the spark that Gabriel lit into a flame and then into an inferno and burning this entire mother to the ground.

Aziraphale is no longer headed to Heaven to run it.

He's headed to Heaven to *overthrow* it.

He's headed to Heaven to *liberate* it.

No idea how much of a chance he will get to succeed alone but this is Aziraphale. He will give them hell if it's the last thing he ever does-- for Muriel and all the angels like them. For all the persecuted demons. For the humans Heaven wants to destroy. For Gabriel.

Most of all, for what they did to Crowley and the 6,000 years of fear and pain they've put them through.

That is the face of an angel who just realized that he had almost been drawn back into Heaven's web of darkness again, only to hear that Heaven wants him to oversee the destruction of 8 billion people and the Earth he calls home and the stars the love of his life built and he has reached his absolute last remaining straw.

They've taken his home and hurt his friends and they took *Crowley* and at this point, Aziraphale no longer gives one flying fuck what it might be that God wants because God can go fuck herself if this it is. The elevator scene is Aziraphale saying Crowley was right:

That angel is *untethered* with barely controlled rage. They nearly played him for a sucker. He might die doing this and they fooled him and he broke Crowley's heart and they've taken too. Fucking. Much. It's just utter destruction. There will be no system of Heaven and Hell done when Aziraphale is through with it.

Aziraphale is about to go from not sure if he should stop Armageddon in S1 to being the angel that destroys the system of Heaven and Hell in S3.

Yes, you can save everyone, Aziraphale, but not alone. You need Crowley's imagination and Gabriel's leadership and Beez's intelligence. That's what they're afraid of. You finally got it in that elevator, so get up there now, get your gang back together, and make some trouble.

#ineffable husbands #good omens #crowley #aziraphale #good omens s2 #good omens 2 #good omens meta

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jessikahathaway · 8 months

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Tainted Love - JJK (M)

Hello hello everybody!

Here is Demon!Jk as promised~

Thank you to everyone who expressed excitement from the teaser! And a special thank you to my bb Ella (@oddinary4bts) for betaing this fic for me and listening to me scream about Demon Jk on discord for the past month. Love you babes!

Alright, fasten your seatbelts, I went a lil AWOL with this but I hope you all enjoy regardless! Please let me know what you think~

Pairing: Jeon Jungkook X F!Reader

Rating: 18+ (Minors DNI)

Genre: Fantasy!AU, Demon!Jk, Witch!Reader, unrequited love, romance, smut, angst, lil fluffy bits in there too.

Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence, main character death (not permenant), Demon!Jk can be toxic, reader is in love and knows she shouldn't be, darker themes - Jungkook is an old demon and isn't a very happy one, they use each other a bit but they work that out. SMUT WARNINGS: Multiple smut scenes (you heard me), unprotected sex (don't be silly), oral (f and m receiving), creampies, rough sex, emotional sex, standing/wall fucking, Jungkook is pussy whipped confirmed, dirty talk (jungkook and reader freak nasty), switch!Jk and switch!reader, hair pulling, vaginal sex.

Words: 16.4k

Summary: Jungkook sometimes forgets the time. Except the time he's spent with you, he's certain those times he'll remember until the day he turns to dust. As a demon with a time limit on his life, will he let you in? The witch who has shown him tenderness instead of a blade at his throat. Does he trust you with his life? Or will you be too late?

Jungkook sometimes forgets the time.

And not in the sense of he can’t remember the time of day, or the day of the week itself. No, it’s gotten much worse over his millenia of life. He legitimately doesn’t remember if it’s the 1700s or 2020s some days. Time is a much more relative construct than most people believe. Life isn’t always linear. Things can happen backwards, things can happen too fast or not at all when someone has believed it to be otherwise.

Jungkook had forgotten the time again today. The smoke of his cigarette rose up above his head and swirled and flowed along with the fan spinning slowly above his head.

He laid on his bed in this dingy apartment that he pays for with money he conjures. Being a demon has its perks. But, to remain under the guise of a regular human, he works at a local mechanics shop.

He lives life as a typical low level human being. He has a backstory and everything. His parents passed away when he was little and his great aunt cared for him until he was old enough to move out on his own. While away she passed and he’s been alone ever since. This small village had accepted him, unfortunately for them.

Now, Jungkook was a demon, but that didn’t mean he was wasteful. Nor was he ruthless and bloodthirsty. No, he was nothing of the sort. He was far too old for childish nonsense like that. His temper had almost fizzled out with the will to change his fate for the better. At this point? He’d rather disappear and be done with it all. Constantly looking for new souls to take, it had been exhausting in the beginning, and now? Now he didn’t care really one way or the other.

He had one year before it all went away.

One year before he dies.

The reason? Jungkook had betrayed his brethren. His fellow demons sentenced him to a life on Earth until he could fulfill a quota of ten thousand souls. Specifically, ten thousand souls of those who are the victims of the painful fate of unrequited love. As that was his crime.

He loved a human woman, and so? He was forced to kill the poor saps that had fallen into his own trap.

A painful irony, but Jungkook had quit feeling pain a long while ago. Five thousand years to complete his task, to take ten thousand souls that were suffering the same pain as himself all those years ago. And finally, after far too many years, his task would be ending. And him along with it all.

He couldn’t find it in himself to care much about himself. He was far too tired.

There was, however, one Earthly pleasure that he’d found himself enjoying.

You.

A witch in your own right, a member of the coven in the area. You’d moved in a few years back and noticed Jungkook immediately. He was handsome, he was dark and mysterious. How were you supposed to resist?

Jungkook initially hadn’t taken that much of a liking to you. But you were persistent and perhaps even a little desperate for a friend that knew at least some of your true identity. Jungkook had finally relented on his reluctance and had let you in. Not much, there were things you were certain he would never tell you. Perhaps some things you wouldn’t want to know in the first place. But, it didn’t take long for you two to start fucking after that.

He was weak for very few things. However, cheap spicy ramen from the convenience store down the street, cigarettes and sex had proven to be nicely distracting.

You were pretty and nice enough, although Jungkook didn’t particularly care for you at first, once you two fucked a few times he could see himself forgiving your little nuisances. They didn’t really matter on the large scale anyways.

Nothing did, actually.

A knock at the door brought him from his stupor. He didn’t have to work today, he’d be pissed if Hoseok came to ask him to cover again. He’d already done it five times in the past month. He put out his cigarette and moved towards the entrance. With a scowl on his face he answered the door to see your frame standing in the doorway.

Jungkook raised a brow at you before looking down to see you dressed in your work uniform. You also had a regular job, but you worked as a bartender at the local joint in town. You took notice of his scowl and gave him a playful pout.

“Aw baby, you look so much cuter when you smile,” you said with a pat to his cheek. Jungkook rolled his eyes but let you in as he saw you carrying his favorite booze in your hand. You set the bottle on the table and went to take your shoes off when Jungkook saw a flash of your panties up your skirt.

It was Saturday. You and Jungkook usually fucked during the week as it worked best with both of your schedules. It was rare to see you on the weekends, as this was when the most tips came from the bar's patrons.

“It’s Saturday,” he said, eyes trailing back to your face.

You’d noticed his staring, but you didn’t care-this is usually what happened when he hadn’t seen you in a while.

“Does that mean we can’t fuck on a Saturday?” you asked, head tilting to the side.

Jungkook lit another cigarette. “Why aren’t you working?” he asked, taking a deep drag off the tobacco stick. You smiled at him and Jungkook sighed deeply.

You only smiled like that when you were up to no good.

“I’m trying to set Sana and Alex up,” you said with that same damned smile.

“Why the fuck do you want to do that?” he asked, tapping some of the ash off his vice into a glass.

“Because they love each other, they just need a push to figure it out for themselves. So I asked to take an earlier shift today because we had a date,” you said, walking closer. Jungkook watched the sway in your hips and felt the stirring in his lower stomach. He wouldn’t mind fucking you tonight. It was better than forgetting what time it was. Again. “Plus a few of my sisters from the coven are coming over tonight.”

Jungkook sighed, decidedly ignoring the mention of your coven. “A date, huh?”

You pouted and he smirked at your disappointment. “What? Can’t I say that’s what it is? Got something against dating me?”

He inhaled deeply. “Not particularly, but demons and witches don’t mesh well.”

A sharp jab to your heart, but Jungkook was great at those. Without realizing it, he broke your heart day after day. It was ridiculous honestly, you shouldn’t have fallen for him in the first place. Really, you shouldn’t have. You knew it was wrong. Jungkook wasn’t incorrect when he said witches and demons don’t get along well. Some witches had a strong moral code and demons could go against all of them without even a second glance.

Jungkook technically could get you kicked out of your coven.

But he was too enthralled with the fact you put out on the regular and you were too enthralled with him in general.

Overall, it wasn’t the best situation, but Jungkook had done you some favors in the past. Acquiring materials for your coven’s spells, summoning a few extra hundred dollars when you’re short on rent, and giving you an equally satisfying sex life.

Hopefully, tonight was going to prove no different.

“You seem to mesh just fine with me,” you said, voice teasing and obviously hinting.

His eyes flashed a deep crimson at the thought of being able to fuck you. He’d been wound up and needing something besides cigarettes recently. Your body would be a welcomed distraction.

“I do, don’t I?” he said, voice turning smoother.

Jungkook was an attentive lover, always making sure you came multiple times. As a demon he had good refraction period and was able to fuck you after cumming-sometimes multiple times a day. Especially if you hadn’t been able to come over often enough.

You hadn’t seen him in probably two weeks, you had to travel for a coven meeting. But it seems those two weeks left him needing you.

He crowded your space, hands winding around your body and squeezing your ass. He rested his head against your collarbone, hiding his face in your neck. Jungkook did this sometimes, almost as if he could shrink his world and thoughts down to just this moment. This space. This breath happening between the two of you.

You were about to ask if he was alright when he captured your lips in a hungry kiss. You responded, letting him back you up towards the wall. Your thighs clenched at the attention. Jungkook had to be the best sexual partner you’d ever had in your almost one hundred years of life. Being a witch had its perks as well.

He was desperate against your mouth, panting and eagerly licking in between your lips, parting them so he could tangle his tongue with yours. His hands wound up your lower back.

“Jungkook, baby,” you whined softly, as he swallowed your lips once more. “I gotta be quick today,” you frowned.

“That’s fine, I won’t last long anyways,” he said, already painfully hard in his jeans.

He turned you around, having your palms flat against the wall. “Think you can stand while I fuck you?” He asked, licking his lips at the sight of your ass presented nicely to him in your short skirt.

“Yes-I can,” you bit your lip, mind reeling with the fact you were about to have him again. You and Jungkook fucked fairly often, probably three times a month, sometimes more if he could swing it. And this had been your arrangement for almost a year now.

People at work knew Jungkook, he was a regular at the bar and people often referred to him as your boyfriend. In their minds you two were just young adults figuring out life and it would all work in the end. You two cared for each other-right?

“Hey,” Jungkook said, voice softer. “You there?”

Ah, you slipped into your thoughts again.

“I’m here, it’s fine-please,” you whimpered, looking over your shoulder at him, the burning in between your thighs causing you pain. Jungkook nodded before flipping your skirt up and tugging your panties down your legs. You were soaked, wetness pulling away with your panties that had Jungkook hissing between his teeth.

“Fuck, do I have time to eat you out? Just a bit? Fuck please,” he begged, kneeling behind you and kissing your ass hungrily. “Let me, I need it baby, please?”

You really did have to be quick, members of your coven were coming over tonight and you’d have to scrub yourself stupid in the shower to not smell like demon. But fuck-when he begged like that?

“Whatever you want,” you said, voice breathless at his eagerness.

He was so good at getting what he wanted. It always worked with you, and it always would unfortunately.

“Fuck yes,” he groaned, placing his mouth on you in needy kisses. Jungkook’s tongue threaded between your lips and found your clit almost immediately. You cried out and gripped the wall as he ate your pussy like a starved man.

He liked it.

He liked eating your pussy so much. Honestly, he wasn’t sure why. Perhaps it was the flavor, the amount of slick you produced for him, the way you rutted your hips back against him whenever he did it. You made the sweetest noises when he had his mouth on your cunt and now was proving no different. Jungkook almost felt high at the feeling of your wetness collecting on his face.

Maybe it was that part he was addicted to. Or maybe it was worse than that. In times like this, he really could forget. He could forget he was a demon, not many people willingly share this much of themselves with a demon and know the consequences. But as a witch, you knew what would happen if your coven found out. You knew and yet? You still let him in. You let him touch you and fuck you. All of it.

“Kook~” you cried out, head pressing against the wall. “Please, gonna cum,” you whimpered out.

Damn, he was hoping to get a little more than that. The next time you came over he was going to want to eat your pussy for hours.

“Then cum for me, baby, get yourself nice and wet for my cock,” he said.

You didn’t need much today, you were just as needy as he was. Probably more so. A few more heady sucks of his lips and you were cumming.

“Jungkook-fuck,” you gasped. He smirked and stood up, licking his lips as he undid his jeans. You panted harshly against the wall, mind whirling in pleasure.

“That’s it, pretty thing,” he cooed, approaching with his now crimson eyes. You knew he must be needing this if he’s so worked up already.

“Please baby, give me your cock?” you asked, reaching behind you to grab the front of his undone jeans. Jungkook followed easily when you tugged, your hand dipping underneath the fabric to grasp his cock. He sighed in pleasure, pushing his pants down further and head tilting back just a touch. He pushed his boxers down as well, freeing his cock entirely before you smiled back at him and taking him in your hand once more.

“Fuck, yes,” he said, voice turning raspy and dark.

You winked and pumped him a few times before lining him up with your dripping core. He hadn’t stretched you but you wanted the burn today. “Fuck me then,” you said, inviting him inside you once more.

Jungkook held your hip as he started to lead his cock between your lips. “You wet enough?” he asked, raising a brow at you.

Such a smug bastard. But his cock was big enough he needed to ask-because he didn’t want to hurt you. His demonic nature was there, but honestly hurting someone that had continuously done him favors didn’t seem that important.

“Y-Yeah,” you whimpered, rubbing against him. “Please put it in, want your thick cock in me so bad Jungkook!”

He nodded, finally pushing in just a touch. You whined, head falling back as you felt the full sensation begin. Jungkook growled out at your tightness gripping his cock just right, giving him the rush of tingles down his spine. He gave gentle thrusts into your heat to ease you open, although you were really squeezing him today and his eyes rolled back in his head at the sensation of your sweet cunt letting him in inch by inch.

“Fuck I love your pussy,” he groaned, rolling his hips into yours fully.

“Love your cock,” you cried, walls clenching down on him harshly. Jungkook couldn’t stop his reaction of bucking into you roughly. You let out a sharp cry at his cock hitting deeper than usual.

“Sorry baby, m’sorry,” he murmured against your skin, kissing your neck and shoulder. Moments like that were the ones you remembered with pain in your chest. The way he easily apologized for the slightest harm to you. All except the harm to your heart.

You shook your head. “It’s okay, don’t worry-just, oh! G-give me more!”

He didn’t need to be told twice, holding your hips he started thrusting inside of you with firm pushes. He huffed in his own pleasure, watching your puffy pussy swallowing his cock with each rut forward. “Look so good like this, take my cock so well,” he sighed, the sweet sensations of your warm, wet walls sucking him in had shivers rocketing down his spine and pooling heat in his stomach.

“Cock so good, made to take it baby, love having you inside me like this,” you mewled. Jungkook smirked at your pleasure cries reaching his ears.

“Made to take me huh?” he asked, giving harsher thrusts inside of you and watching as your face morphed into shocked pleasure.

“J-Jungkook!” you sobbed out.

He was panting against your skin, thrusting inside you with eager pushes of his hips against your ass. The sound of skin slapping echoed through his apartment.

Jungkook could barely think at this point in sex. He was driven by your high pitched cries and the boiling need in his stomach. “Cum baby, cum all over my cock. Gonna let me cum inside today baby?” He teased, huffing sex driven laughter across your throat while he bit down.

“Mmm~ah! Y-Yeah, it’s fine, I have the potion for it,” you cried, grabbing his hand that was gripping one of your hips. He wound the other around your front to start playing with your clit to get you there faster.

“Then I’m gonna fill you up baby, feel it dripping inside of you huh? Wanna cum baby, fuck I really want it, say I can have it,” he groaned.

He loved hearing you beg for his cum. It did something to him, made his high that much sweeter because you pleaded for it. You wanted him that badly. There was something hot about having your watery eyes beg with his to finally let you cum.

“You can, you always can baby,” you promised, holding his wrist while he pounded inside you brutally.

Jungkook smiled against your skin before husking permission to cum against your jaw. With a deep gasp you came, Jungkook following not too shortly after. Your pussy milking him with each pulse of your afterglow.

“Thank you-fuck, oh baby,” you shivered against him, leaning into the kisses he trailed along your shoulder.

“Fuck give me a second, I came so hard,” he said, slumping against you while he pressed you against the wall with him still inside of you. But soon enough you felt him soften and with a deep sigh he pulled from you.

You shivered as his cum trickled down your thigh.

“Ah shit, sorry baby,” he said, running to grab a few tissues. You panted softly against the wall, keeping yourself steady so as not to make a mess. He came back and helped you clean up a bit and offered you his shower.

“Can’t, got sisters coming over tonight, if I shower here they’ll smell demon on me from a mile away,” you stated. “But thanks,” you said with a smile.

He nodded, sitting at his tiny coffee table smoking a cigarette.

Jokingly, you teased him. “Those’ll kill you one day,” you said, pulling on your shoes.

Jungkook’s face didn’t smile like you were hoping. Although it rarely did, you felt the difference. He was… upset?

“No, I’ll be dead by next year regardless,” he whispered.

The room went eerily quiet. Your heart was hammering in your chest. What did he mean he would be dead by next year?

“What the fuck does that mean?” You said, walking towards him in concern. “The fuck do you mean you’ll be dead by next year?”

Jungkook wasn’t phased by your anger. You hardly knew his story and he preferred to keep it that way. Because he knew this would be your reaction. And he hated fighting with you. It never made any difference.

“Didn’t you find a demon, on its own-no contracts or groups or general mayhem happening-a little odd?” He asked, putting out his cigarette.

You swallowed thickly. It was odd. But you weren’t going to argue with a good thing and, perhaps you’d hoped that there was maybe just a happy coincidence, for once.

Of course you were wrong.

Naïveté hadn’t served you well in the past and it seemed to stomp your heart once again in this long life of yours…

“I never found you odd, Jungkook,” you said.

“You should’ve.”

Your heart was racing making your next words slightly frantic. “What’s wrong with you, huh? What’s going on? Are you finally gonna tell me?”

He sighed deeply. He hated the sound of your voice right now. You sounded like you were going to cry, and he didn’t want to make you upset. Watching you cry was painful.

“I have a quota of souls to collect. If I don’t collect all of them by the time set-I disappear,” he said. “The souls of those who know unrequited love.”

Your throat felt dry at his statement. What could you say to that? Was there anything to be said? It’s not like you two were dating, it’s also not like you ever could with you being in the coven.

“How many souls do you have left?” You asked, voice sad.

“Ten,” he breathed.

Ten. Ten souls before next year didn’t seem crazily difficult. But the specificity did complicate things.

You nodded. “Okay, I’ll help you,” you said.

Jungkook’s head snapped to you, and he stood quickly. “Don’t fucking say that,” he said, voice shaking with anger.

“But why not? Why can’t I help you? I have the ability to find souls like that, we can travel and you can collect.” You explained.

“We?” He asked, raising a brow. “You really think I trust you enough to let you do that? How do I know you wouldn’t take me right to that coven of yours?”

You felt your heart break. “Is that what you think I would do?” You said, voice sad and in disbelief. Jungkook knew it was a low blow, but he had to get you to leave if this is where this conversation was going.

He didn’t like hurting you, or your feelings. It usually wasn’t necessary but sometimes you dug too deep, and he had to back you off somehow.

“The fuck is your problem you asshole,” you sniffled, wiping your eyes. “All I did was ask to help you, is it so wrong that I actually want you around? That I actually like hanging out with your crabby ass… call me when you’re not being a massive dickhead” you said, grabbing your bag but intentionally leaving the booze. All it would do was make you think of him anyway. Jungkook was about to call out your name but you slammed the door right in the middle of his sentence.

“Fuck…”

He knew that wasn’t fair, he knew that he shouldn’t have snapped at you like that but… sometimes you did get too close. Jungkook knew what his end would be, and there wasn’t anything you or he could do about it.

At least, nothing he wanted to do about it…

—

You hadn’t spoken to Jungkook in a week or two now. He hadn’t reached out and you weren’t particularly interested in fighting with him again, not right now. He really did hurt your feelings… He could trust you, you wondered briefly what it would take for him to listen. To hear that you wanted him to collect those souls.

You were just as damned as he was, you knew that. Even more so if your coven discovered what you were up to in your bedroom. And heart…

Just as you were about to suck it up and call him, your phone rang. It was a number you didn’t immediately recognize, but the area code was local.

“Hello?” You answered.

“Hey, Y/N?” Hoseok’s voice echoed through the phone. Hoseok was a fellow mechanic at the shop Jungkook worked at.

But what would he be calling for?

“Yeah? What’s up Hoseok?” You asked.

“Um… Jungkook, he collapsed at work, he might need to go to the doctor but we’re slammed. You’re his emergency contact so I’m calling you to let you know what’s going on?” His voice sounded worried and confused. Jungkook never got sick, he was a demon, but they didn’t know that. They just knew he was a healthy young guy.

But this was odd.

“I’ll be right there,” you said, hanging up and grabbing your keys.

The drive through town was relatively quiet, but when you got to the shop you could see that there were several people waiting for their usual tune ups and repair work.

You walked in and Ashley, the receptionist, smiled at you. “Hey Y/N, thanks for coming. Jungkook’s in the office with Namjoon,” she said softly.

With a nod you headed back towards the office. You heard Namjoon speaking to Jungkook, but it seemed like he was either not responsive or just choosing to ignore him. The latter seemed more probable. Namjoon was the head mechanic at the shop and ran it for his friend Chen who owned a couple different car places throughout the area.

You opened the door and Jungkook’s head turned towards you. “Baby,” he called. You tried to keep the smirk off your face but you crossed your arms and leaned back against the door.

“Oh, so now I’m your baby?” You said, running your tongue along your teeth with an unimpressed look on your face. Jungkook sighed heavily, knowing that you were going to be pissed with him, he was lucky you came at all. Especially after how he treated you the last time you two saw each other.

Namjoon sighed, used to the bickering and sour looks shared between the two of you here and there. “I don’t know what caused it Y/N, but he seems pretty sick. He might need to go to the doctor.”

Jungkook was about to protest when you nodded. “I’ll take him,” you said. His eyes flashed red in annoyance but it was brief.

“Chen’s already given him the rest of today and tomorrow off,” Namjoon said. “So hopefully that’ll give him some time to recoup, but if he needs more just have him give us a call.”

You nodded, reaching for Jungkook’s hand. He took it, sitting up slowly. You read his energy and found yourself immediately concerned. He seemed to notice your worry and sighed deeply before standing and leaning against you. Without much more ceremony you ledhim to your car.

Neither of you said much as you got him in and started off towards his place. You would have to do an energy transfer for him tonight, luckily it would just take a few potions or a spell to replenish his energy, sex worked as well but ultimately the cause had you concerned.

His human body was starting to deteriorate.

When you arrived you grabbed him and helped get him inside his house.

He was panting softly and laid back on his bed in a huff.

“You need energy,” you whispered, leaning forward to give him some of yours to ease some of his pain. Jungkook turned his head to keep your lips from connecting in the way he needed. “You’re being a shit, either let me help you or delete my number.”

Jungkook frowned, swallowing hard before turning his head so your lips could connect. He breathed deeply in relief as your energy flowed through him softly. Your energy had always been soothing to him, but right now it seemed to help immensely.

He’d missed you.

When you moved to pull away he grabbed you by the back of your neck and connected your lips again. You kissed him with a gentleness that he wasn’t used to, your lips gliding over his softly and with a warmth that was addictive.

He loved your bites and eager kisses but this… This had things stirring in his stomach that frightened him.

Jungkook was afraid of very few things. But your genuine care for him scared him most of all. Because he knew he didn’t deserve it. Jungkook wasold and angry and yet, more exhausted than anything.

You wrapped your arms around his neck and settled in his lap. Kissing him a bit more to relax him. The energy would settle soon enough and he would at least be able to tell you what happened.

“Baby,” he called, voice raspy and tired.

“Yes, Kook, what’s wrong?” You cooed, running your hands through his hair to ease him into accepting your energy. The more he fought it the less it would work. “Relax baby, I can’t help if you don’t let me.”

He nodded, head dropping into your neck as he simply tried to feel you. It had been a long time since he’d needed a transfer from you but each time he always forgot how easy you made it.

“Good job, sweet boy,” you praised, kissing his cheek and temple.

Jungkook sighed heavily against your skin, placing tender kisses there as well. “Can I have more energy baby… please?”

You smirked. “Do you want the potions? I know they taste bad but they work, or we can do a direct transfer through sex-”

“Yes,” he said quickly.

You chuckled softly before nodding. “That’s fine then, lay back baby,” you said, undoing his belt and getting his pants unbuttoned.

“Fuck,” he sighed, head tipping back in bliss as you touched him. He felt encompassed by you and your soothing energy.

Your hand slipped in his pants and squeezed his cock gently to encourage him to harden. Your kisses on his jaw and neck stayed sweet but they were firmer, something told you he needed to be babied today. And even though it was rare, you adored it every time. You pushed his pants down further so they wouldn’t be in your way, sending him a look as you spat on his cock. You wrapped your hand around the shaft and pumped slowly, watching the pleasure write across his features.

“F-Fuck, yeah-ah,” he whimpered, eyes shut and brow furrowed in ecstasy.

“Getting so hard so fast, gonna feel so good in my pussy baby,” you cooed, taking his hand and leading it under your skirt.

Jungkook’s eyes practically sparkled at the fact you were so wet. “Soaked-you’re soaked angel,” he moaned, touching your core carefully.

You hiccuped a soft sigh of pleasure before leaning down and taking his cock in your mouth. Jungkook’s breathing stammered at your hot and wet throat swallowing his cock.

You’d always done it so well, and Jungkook could say he would die happily if you were sucking his dick. “F-Fuck, angel, please-mmm,” he groaned, his other hand gently caressing the back of your head. “Sweet tongue, feels so fucking good.

You swirled your tongue around the head of his cock before eagerly swallowing it again. Jungkook’s submissive whines had you clenching your thighs together as his fingers snuck inside your panties.

“O-Open your legs-please, wanna touch your pussy, need to feel you,” he whimpered.

Without much ceremony you did as he asked, opening your legs to let him touch you. Jungkook moaned at the feeling of your slick heat against his fingers, he plunged two inside of you causing your throat to tighten around his cock, giving him a rush of heady pleasure down his spine. He could feel you everywhere. Your energy coursing through him, your hot mouth on his dick and your juicy pussy dripping down his fingers. He was quickly getting overwhelmed in the best way. He wanted more of you, more and more until there was nothing left to give. He wanted to give you more too.

He desperately wished he could sometimes.

“Koo~” you moaned on his cock, rutting your hips gently to remind him you were currently soaking his hand and needed some stimulation or you were going to lose your mind.

“Yeah angel baby, soaking pussy feels so good...”

You whimpered on his cock, using the vibrations to pleasure him that much more. But his fingers were working so much slick from your core you knew you needed to have him inside or you were going to go insane. He cried out when you pulled away, eyes wide with need. You kissed him then, giving him a touch more energy to help ease his frantic breathing. He shivered when you climbed on top of him, your warmth and wetness seemingly everywhere.

“Ready baby? Want me to put you in?” you asked, tugging your panties off and slipping your skirt down and off of your legs.

Jungkook nodded quickly. “Please, please baby let me feel you,” he said, reaching for you as you crawled back into his bed. You smiled and rubbed yourself against his cock teasingly for a moment before Jungkook looked about ready to cry.

“Alright sweetie, I’ll stop teasing now, take what you need,” you said, easing yourself down on him. Jungkook’s hands settled at your hips, huffing out desperate breaths of pleasure as your tight heat swallowed his sensitive cock.

“Yes! Yes fuck, feels so fucking good angel, oh baby,” he cried, sounding wrecked already.

You had a feeling you would be doing most of the work today, so you started gingerly bouncing on his cock. Jungkook’s eyes were sparkling, turning a soft purple color as your magic intertwined with him. You had been training for years to have this level of mana and Jungkook knew he’d only scratched the surface of your abilities on days like this.

Sometimes he wondered how strong you really were. You handled him like you weren’t afraid of him or his powers. Albeit his strength was significantly less than it was back in hell.

Even then though, he was curious.

“Fuck~ Jungkook!” you whined, grinding your clit on his lower stomach. “Please, please baby, wanna make you cum,” you pleaded. “Cum inside me baby, please? Give me your cum and I’ll take it like such a good girl. Your good girl Kook,” you said, reaching down to play with yourself.

Jungkook groaned in pleasure. “So close baby, so close-ah fuck!” he gritted out through his teeth.

“Gonna fill me up? Please give it to me, Jungkook. Wanna have your cum so deep inside.”

He couldn’t hold it back anymore, Jungkook sat up and pulled you close as he rutted deeply in your pussy for a few quick thrusts before he shivered in release. You felt your core pulsing at his whimpers and whines from the pleasure your body gave him. His head was flush against your chest as he panted.

You smiled, running your fingers through his hair to soothe him. Your energy was mellowing nicely with his giving him more color in his face that eased your own heart. “Kook,” you said softly. “D’you feel okay?” you asked, hips and thighs burning from the effort to fuck him, but the pleased look on his face made everything worth it in your mind.

“You didn’t cum,” he said, reaching down to touch your sensitive clit. He was still decently hard inside of you, but you knew he didn’t have long. “Wanna make you cum angel,” he said, rolling his hips up into your gingerly.

“Mmm, baby,” you called in a pitched tone. “Won’t take much, I’m so close,” you hiccuped, resting your head on his shoulder.

Jungkook grunted, his cock was sensitive but your sweet moans kept him up long enough to feel that tight squeeze from your pussy and the rush of slick that soaked his cock in response. “Fuck, yes, yes give it to me,” he begged.

You wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed him sweetly. You scanned his energy quickly and felt relieved to know it was almost back to normal. “Thank you baby,” you said, patting his cheek with a dizzying smile.

“It’s not as good if you don’t cum, love feeling you squeeze me,” he sighed in bliss, your warmth still holding his cock nicely.

Sometimes he liked this. He liked just feeling your body against his, his cock inside you for a few moments after you both came. You got wetter and slicker and your walls felt so nice on his cock he thought it would make him cum again some days.

You smoothed your hands down his back, holding him close as your energy finally settled and his eyes changed back to their regular brown color.

With wobbly knees you got up and headed towards his bathroom.

Jungkook laid on his back and stared at the ceiling. He wanted a cigarette but he’d run out the night before.

You came back and stood before him. Jungkook could see up your skirt and he was trying not to focus on that as you stood there with a waiting expression.

He inhaled deeply. “I know you read my energy. You know what’s happening to me,” he said.

“I want to hear you say it to me,” you stated.

Jungkook nodded, agreeing with your demands of honesty. Finally.

“Not all demons are without humanity. Some have more than others, yet I always seemed to stray towards more rather than less… there was a woman, I slowly found things I liked about her. Then things I enjoyed… then things I found myself smiling about on my own. I was endeared to this woman… I loved her in a sense,” he said, staring at the ceiling.

“And yet, it wasn’t enough,” he breathed. “My fellow knights laughed at me, then berated me for genuinely showing care towards a human. As one of the high knights of hell I was expected to have higher standards than disgusting humans. So they bound me in a human body, locking most of my powers away, so I would no longer be able to communicate with the human I once cared for. And then I was given the quota I told you about… and five thousand years to make it happen. If I didn’t collect a thousand souls then I cease to exist, it’s starting. My timer is running out.”

You swallowed thickly. “How do I help you stop it? How do I help you?”

Jungkook gave you a tired smile. “Baby, I don’t want to ask that of you. I’m so old now, this life doesn’t matter to me anymore.”

You felt a few tears well up in your eyes despite yourself. “It fucking matters to me…” you whimpered. “You matter to me.”

Jungkook was stunned. “Y/N,” he said, reaching for you.

You sat on the bed next to him. “I don’t want you to disappear. What will happen if you collect all one thousand souls?”

“I will be reinstated in Hell,” he murmured. “I won’t disappear and I will be back to full strength once more.”

You swallowed hard, nodding your head. Either way you’d lose him, but at least one way he’d still be alive… “Then let me help you, I don’t want to see you die like this.”

Jungkook sighed deeply. He’d never had many friends. He had people he kept around for convenience, but overall he’d kept to himself throughout the years. You were the only one in recent history that he’d told anything to. Perhaps he could truly do this. He could be reborn in hell once more.

And when he got back to hell… he could rip those knights apart for what they put him through…

He nodded. “I’ll need your help,” he said.

“You have it,” the words fell easily from your lips. “I won’t let you die like this.”

“Then I won’t.”

—

Jungkook hadn’t expected you to take this so seriously. And yet, here you were in his apartment. You had your glasses on and were gazing at your spellbook as a potion boiled on the stove. Jungkook alway thought you used a cauldron.

‘You think my tiny ass apartment could fit a cauldron?!’ You’d cried in annoyance at his teasing.

So here it bubbled and boiled and no doubt would cause trouble for Jungkook when he would ultimately have to clean it later.

“Baby,” he called, moving closer to you with your cup of coffee.

You’d stayed the night last night-Jungkook may have fucked you stupid enough he was worried about you driving. There weren’t any sisters of the coven stopping by soon so you could spend the night wrapped in his sheets. And you did exactly that.

You had ten months and twelve days to complete the task Jungkook had been given.

Ten more souls in ten months.

You’d already gotten a list together of possible cities you could look into. Once you had your potion perfected, Jungkook could go out and find his prey with minimal difficulty.

You took the cup from him, setting your spellbook aside as he sat across from you on the couch. You sighed and removed your glasses, rubbing your sleepy features before taking a sip of the hot coffee.

Jungkook watched you and gave your knee a squeeze. “Don’t use up too much energy baby. I’ve got ten months,” he said.

“Ten months isn’t a long time for a witch, nor is it for a demon, we need to work quickly before your condition progresses,” you said, drinking more of your coffee.

Jungkook crawled forward, taking your coffee from you which caused a pout to befall your features. He set your coffee down and crawled on top of you, laying his head right under your chest. He’d crawled between your thighs and was lying entirely over you.

“Need more energy?” You asked, running your fingers through his hair.

“No, I’m fine,” he said, resting against you.

You chuckled before resting back, hand still playing with the hair on his head. Recently, Jungkook had been craving these more than his cigarettes. Simple touches, soft kisses and conversations. Jungkook had never felt so at ease before. Even in his life as a knight of hell.

Jungkook rested heavily against your stomach, laying in between your legs. You knew this could be a side effect of your energy transfer-but it had been a while since he’d needed one. Usually the clinging from your energy would dissipate in a day or two.

It had been at least a week at this point. So what made Jungkook so snuggly? You didn’t want to complain about a sweet thing however.

Jungkook leaned into you more, curling around you as you kept rubbing his scalp. He seemed happy to just stay like this for a while. And you wondered what was causing such a change in him. Was this what he was like with those he trusted?

Sweet and softer?

Or was this purely for you-

No.

You couldn’t think that way, not about Jungkook. Either way this ended with him leaving you… you had to keep focused, you were doing this for your friend.

Your truest friend.

Jungkook snoozed on your belly, content to laze about while you did the hard work. But your heart broke a little more that day.

As you slowly started to fall for a man without a soul.

You’d been stressed today.

Jungkook could tell that you were just by the cute frown on your face, it seemed to have a permanent place on your pretty features today. It always appeared when you were frustrated or angry. He’d seen it directed at him several times, but right now it was at the potion you were working on.

There was a new ingredient you were sampling in it or something to that effect, Jungkook didn’t really understand much of what you were doing to be honest. But it was clear you were stumped for now. It was almost two o’clock in the morning.

“Y/N...” he trailed off, approaching as you sighed deeply.

Jungkook rarely said your name, so to hear it come out you knew whatever he said next he either was serious.

“Time to take a break,” he whispered, standing behind you in his kitchen. There were bags of ingredients all over the kitchen and it would no doubt be left there until later when you two woke up. You’d been staying at his place more and more lately and he couldn’t find it in himself to complain. He had access to your sweet lips and body daily, but it seemed rare that he wanted sex recently. Not that he wasn’t attracted or he was disinterested, it was merely there were other things about you that he was finding more and more interesting. Sex would always be one of his favorite activities with you, but right now he felt that he was learning new things about you everyday. It had him excited in ways he hadn’t been in centuries.

It also had him concerned.

Jungkook was a demon, he shouldn’t be having feelings like this. It almost shouldn’t be possible. It was not in his design to care much about people or have interest in them other than striking deals and killing them to collect their souls.

But Jungkook pushed all of those worries and thoughts to the back of his head.

Because your frown had appeared again, and that sweet pout he wanted to kiss.

“I’ve almost got it,” you said, voice soft and sleepy.

“I’m sure you do baby, but you’re tired and you won’t work well when you’re falling asleep,” he said, kissing your shoulder. “Come to bed...”

You leaned back heavily against him, looking up at his face while you sighed. With a tired smile you patted his cheek.

“I don’t want to give up for the night yet, you go to bed, I’ll join you in a bit...”

Jungkook wasn’t going to take that for his answer. So he turned the burner on his stove off and lifted you into his arms deftly. You didn’t have it in you to fight him, you expected this result anyways.

He laid you in bed and crawled in next to you. He pulled you into his embrace and sighed heavily as you snuggled in. He wrapped you up in his arms and you looked at his expression and gave him a smile. A real one. In reward he returned it, kissing your lips before laying back on the pillow.

“Sleep baby, we can try again in the morning.”

His words soothed something inside of you, the desperate thirst to have this potion done so you didn’t waste any more precious time.

You could waste a little time though, right?

Here in his arms you thought you could waste a lot more time than you had...

—

A weekend trip to the city was easy to conceal from your coworkers and sisters. You claimed you wanted a weekend away from coven activities-which was a bold-faced lie as you would be using magic in public which was almost exclusively forbidden. And doing it to help a demon.

Needless to say you hoped no one in your coven ever found out about this.

Jungkook grabbed his bag and tossed it into the back of his car as he got your stuff in too. “Got my keys baby?”

You tossed them across his car and he caught them, moving into the drivers side and opening your door for you. You climbed in and buckled up and shortly thereafter you were on the road.

You and Jungkook turned on a playlist and drove out of the town's limits and made it to the highway. Jungkook changed the playlist and you two settled in for a while.

After a bit, Jungkook reached over and grabbed your thigh, driving with one hand on the wheel. You looked down at his hand before gazing back at him.

“What?” You asked softly.

Ten months and three days. That’s how long you had left.

“Just wanted to.”

Your mouth curved into a shy smile before you placed your hand on his, afterwards your fingers intertwined in your lap.

Soon, you rolled into the city. Jungkook had gotten a decent hotel room for a few days for you two to have a home base. You’d find sections of the city where the next soul was and Jungkook could go out at night and collect.

His powers made it discrete however. Usually the attack was made to look like a natural cause. Rarely did it arouse suspicion. All by design.

When you two made it to your hotel room, Jungkook was quick to attach himself to you. He’d been less interested in solely gaining sex from you recently. However it had been a while since your last romp.

His lips found your neck as you tried to get your stuff out of your bag.

“Kook, what do you want?” You huffed as his hard length brushed against your ass. An aroused shiver rushed through you, sex being a little less frequent between the two of you had you more sensitive to his touch than usual.

“Wanna fuck baby, please?” He asked, rutting against your core softly.

You rolled back against him, unable to help yourself in this instant. His body felt so good and you were more than willing to have him between your legs.

“Yes, fuck me, Kook,” you breathed.

Jungkook didn’t waste much time, he hooked his fingers in your pants and pulled them down quickly. Your panties were damp and Jungkook purred at the sight. “You’re so wet baby,” he smiled, his hand dipping in your panties while he kissed your jaw.

You couldn’t help the soft juts of your hips into the cup of his pelvis, causing your ass to grind against his cock. “Fuck… Jungkook,” you whined, head rolling back on his chest. A soft chuckle escaped him at your needy tone.

“Yeah, m’gonna fuck you so hard baby,” he said. His fingers found your wet folds, sinking two inside your entrance shallowly, causing you to clench desperately.

You held his wrist, whimpering in need. “Please, please,” you panted. “Need something inside. Need you inside me, Kook.”

Jungkook kissed your jaw, a smile on his face. “Want my cock baby? Want it in that sweet little pussy?”

“Yeah~” you pleaded.

With a deep sigh Jungkook took his hand from inside your panties, tasting your slick and moaning.

“I need to eat your pussy first,” he said, turning you around and laying you on the bed. You laid back on the bed, peeling your legs open so that he could lay between them. Jungkook grabbed your panties and tossed them away. He breathed out in an eager pant. His eyes were locked on your core and then he looked at you.

“Wanna eat it baby?” you asked, smiling at his hungry eyes.

“Yeah,” he whined. “Let me have it, please baby let me eat your pretty pussy. Make you cum so nice,” he said, licking his lips.

Jungkook looked at your core, furrowed brows as he seemed as if he was almost in pain. “Please…”

You nodded. “Okay baby,” you said with a grin. “Take it then.”

He captured your lower lips in a hot kiss, moaning deeply as he licked between your folds to gather more of your sweetness that had him addicted. “Fuck… yes,” he groaned, moving to hold your thighs apart so he had better access to your dripping core.

“Kook!” You whined, head falling back on your shoulders as your fingers wound into his hair. “Fuck, fuck your mouth!” You cried.

Jungkook was eager to eat, it seemed that no matter how much time he spent between your legs it wouldn’t be enough. He’d always wish for one more minute, your sweet cunt on his mouth and your wetness gathering on his tongue had his cock pulsing in need. But he didn’t care about that, getting you soaking wet for his cock was all that was on his mind.

He took your clit between his pretty lips and started sucking harshly. He swirled his tongue around your sensitive bud before going back to suck again. You mewled in pleasure, thighs trembling at his heady touches. His middle and pointer fingers rubbed over your core before catching at your entrance. With a soft smirk he pushed his two fingers inside your hot walls.

“Jungkook!” you cried, grabbing his hair harshly. He just moaned in acknowledgment, happily slurping the wetness you leaked as he thrust his fingers in and out of your pussy slowly. His eyes shimmered at the sight of your slick coating his digits as it always did.

“I love your pussy so much, fuck,” he growled, lips and chin covered in you.

“So close, Jungkook,” you begged, the throbbing in your walls a clear sign of your oncoming orgasm.

He smirked again, before pulling away. You were about to cry for him to keep going when you heard him unbuckling his pants. With eager hands you moved forward to grab at him, pulling him closer as he chuckled at your neediness.

“Don’t laugh at me,” you scowled.

“Sorry baby,” he cooed, kissing your jaw. “Gonna make you squirt on my cock to make up for it huh?”

You felt the rush of his words tingle down your spine. He rarely didn’t mean what he said. And you were his good girl. If he wanted you to squirt on his cock then so be it.

You two quickly got worked up as Jungkook kissed you breathless and you tugged his pants down his thick thighs. He pulled his shirt off of his body and your eyes always widened. His tattoos were on full display and his toned body moving on top of you had stars forming in your eyes.

“You’re such a slut for a hot body,” he smirked, eyes dark and swirling with red undertones.

“I’m a slut for your hot body, yes,” you corrected. His eyes widened at your statement, but you were pumping his dick in your hand and he quickly felt his need for you taking over.

“Then let me put it in,” he sighed, naked now.

You were pulling your bra off when Jungkook leaned close. You looked at him in bewilderment for a moment before you smiled and wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him in for a kiss.

There was this... sensation in Jungkook’s chest. Your bright eyes, teasing smile and sweet kiss encasing him and making him feel...

Lighter.

You laid back once you were naked as well and Jungkook moved eagerly to get in position. You giggled as he dragged you closer, adjusting you so his cock was now level with your pussy.

“Gonna put it in now baby,” he said, pushing just the tip of his cock inside before pulling out. You cried in impatience and Jungkook nodded, listening to both of your desires and pushing in further. Your fingers gripped the sheets of the bed and Jungkook rubbed your clit with his thumb to ease any tension from you so you could take him easily. He pulsed inside your cunt, a shiver of bliss running down his spine. It felt like electricity flowing through him. Your pussy was warm and snug around his cock and he could feel your wetness leaking down onto his balls already and he smiled.

“Jungkook! Please, please move,” you whined, eyes watery and pretty.

“Yes angel baby,” he agreed, thrusting inside of you with a steady pace.

The two of you moaned in appreciation of the other. Jungkook’s thick cock filled you in every way you wanted and needed, hitting all the right fucking spots. You’d never had another partner make you feel this way in the over one hundred years of your life. You clenched tightly and Jungkook swore he almost lost his fucking mind. He grabbed your thigh as he ground his pelvis against yours after every other thrust, holding himself up with the other hand. He was rewarded with your decadent cries.

“Fuck! Jungkook, fuck me baby, please, more-I need more,” you begged, grabbing his upper back and shoulders desperately.

Your wish was his command. He moved your thighs so your knees touched your ribs and started fucking you harder. The sound of your wet pussy swallowing him filled the room and he could hardly think. The only thing driving him was your cries and the pulsing in his lower stomach.

“Fucking wet pussy, yes-yes!” He sighed, his head tipping back for a moment as the pleasure of the moment overcame him.

“So big-so full!” you whimpered.

Jungkook smiled at your mewling cries, they coursed through his veins and made his chest tighten. Bringing you to this point was always so exhilarating. He loved pushing you to your limits and watching you shudder and gasp as he forced you to take it over and over again while the sparkle in your eye never faded. You wanted to take it, take him. You loved challenging him and bringing him to his knees just as often as he did to you.

“Yeah, take my big cock, snug little pussy takes my cock so well,” he growled, leaning down to kiss you with dark passion. He sucked on your lower lip before capturing your tongue in between his lips instead.

“Ahhh~” you whined, his hips pushing harder and harder against yours. He finally released your tongue and pulled you into another deep kiss before giving two more firm thrusts before looking at you, his eyes swirling with their beautiful red hue.

“Wanna fuck you from behind baby,” he purred, pulling from you and encouraging you to roll onto your belly. He spanked your ass, gripping the flesh between his fingers and watching you writhe in need for him.

“Please Kook,” you begged. “Put it back in...” you said, wiggling your hips to entice him. Jungkook spanked you again, causing you to gasp in pleasure.

“Wait for my cock you needy girl,” he said. “I’ll make it worth it,” he promised, leaning down to kiss your shoulder. You leaned your head to the side and reached up to cradle his neck. Jungkook trailed his hand down to your soaked pussy, throbbing with the need to cum. He slipped his fingers inside of you, reaching his other hand around your throat to tilt your head up. You watched him tower over you while his fingers plunged in and out of your sopping pussy.

Jungkook bit his lip while watching your eyes glaze over with the desire to cum. He loved bringing you to this point. Needy, eager and pleading for the pleasure he can deliver to you. “Sweet pussy baby, wanna cum? Wanna cum on my fingers?”

You couldn’t even form words with how good he felt. Your mouth was open as you panted your pleasure out in desperation.

“Or do you want my thick cock making you cream and squirt?” He teased, curling his fingers to hit that spot inside you that had stars swirling in your vision. “What does my angel want?”

“Kook, p-put your cock in, need it!” You rasped, feeling far too fucked out to handle anymore teasing.

Jungkook honestly couldn’t wait much longer either. His stomach felt tight with desire and he really needed to cum.

“Okay baby,” he cooed. Honestly, Jungkook was at his limit too. He couldn’t wait to feel the walls of your pussy wrapped around him while he plowed you into the bed and finished inside. Fuck, he wanted it so badly.

Finally he lined up with your entrance and pushed inside slowly. A soft cry came from your lips that Jungkook shushed, a lazy smile on his face. “Don’t cry at me baby, I’ll fuck you even harder for it.”

Little did Jungkook know, you wanted the rough treatment right now. You wanted more of it. He sighed in bliss when he bottomed out in your tight cunt, a deep seated pleasure boiling in his stomach. He couldn’t wait to feel you cream around his cock. You were flat on your belly, legs together but ass perched slightly up so Jungkook slid all the more easily.

“Yeah... just like that, good girl angel, that’s my good girl,” he said, starting to pick up pace rather quickly. You didn’t need him to be careful, you needed him to make you cum.

“Kook-Jungkook!” you cried, gripping the sheets between your fingers as he started pounding you just as he promised.

He couldn’t help the grin that fell over his features when he saw that ring of your cream forming at the base of his cock. “Fuck, fuck baby you look so good like this. Letting me fucking cream this pussy, ah~” he whined at your clenching walls sucking him in-begging in their own right for his cum.

“Please kook, so close, let me cum baby, please-I need it, need you Kook!” you cried. Jungkook’s hands found yours as he leveraged his hips so he could go even harder inside you.

“Gonna make me cum baby, make me cum fuck,” he huffed out, breaths coming in short pants. His brow was sweaty and the muscles in his thighs were trembling from the position he was fucking you in. But he didn’t care. Because your pussy was working him over and his balls were tensing as he waited for you to rut those cute little hips back.

Like clockwork you did as he expected, one of your tells you would be cumming soon. “Fuck, Jungkook! So close-so close!” you squealed, gripping his hands desperately as he was slamming into you. The wet squelching noises of your pussy were driving him up the wall and the view of your ass while he wreaked havoc on your body.

“M’gonna cum, angel, tell me where you want it,” he said, panting against your ear as he leaned over you.

“Inside baby, want all your cum inside me,” you whined.

He growled deeply, kissing your neck and biting down while he rutted inside harshly. ��Take it then, cream my cock while I fill you up,” he said, another passionate snarl leaving his lips.

You answered with your own sweet mewls of pleasure, egging him on, whispering more naughty things to make him fuck you that much harder.

It didn’t take much longer before you both found yourselves thrown into orgasm. You first, walls squeezing him tightly, pulling him over the edge of bliss alongside you. He breathed hard against your shoulder, kissing along your skin to ease both of you through the intense sensations.

His cum started seeping past his softening cock and Jungkook finally found the ability to move once more. He wandered to the bathroom and got a few washcloths to clean the pair of you up with. Soft kisses were placed along the crown of your head, your cheeks and lips. “Such a good girl, angel baby,” he praised, more words of affection lain across your skin with his mouth.

Jungkook crawled into bed with you, pulling your frame close. “You alright?”

A soft chuckle escaped you, curling into him with practiced ease. “Yeah, m’good,” you said, eyes drooping slowly.

He smiled at you then, and you felt an odd pulse go through you.

The sooner you helped him, the faster he would slip from your grasp. These moments with him were fleeting, each time closer and closer to the last time you’d be entangled like this. Each kiss counting down in big red numbers. Your heart squeezed, and before you knew it, tears started to fall from your eyes.

Jungkook startled at the sudden change in emotion from you. “Hey, what’s wrong baby? Y/N?”

For a moment you really thought.

You really thought that you two could love each other...

Jungkook left your room late that evening. He kissed your head as you slept, curled up in the sheets naked. Jungkook almost didn’t want to leave you, he wanted to sleep as well-he wanted to hold your warm frame against him as he did.

These thoughts were starting to concern him. These were the very kinds of thoughts that had damned him to spend five thousand years on Earth. He wasn’t keen on suffering for another five thousand.

As a demon, Jungkook wasn’t sure if he should be able to feel these things. He was starting to care for you. He wanted to spend time with you, he wanted to be around you. But he knew that your time together was limited. Either he died or was sent back to hell, and either way you two would lose each other in the end.

It made him angry that this was your fate.

He didn’t want his time with you to be on a countdown. But the world is cruel by design and there was nothing Jungkook could do. You would ultimately be ripped from each other.

As he walked down the streets, Jungkook took your potion you’d made to help him navigate all the different souls at once. Jungkook wasn’t used to hunting like this anymore, it felt like decades since his last hunt. Perhaps it was, he wasn’t sure at this point. One thousand souls is a lot of people to collect from, and five thousand years is a long time to be on Earth. He was always forgetting the time before he met you.

Now, his time had never felt more limited.

Jungkook weaved through the people of the night, watching with keen eyes that were enhanced with your potion. Your potion also enhanced his other abilities, his strength and allure were heightened as well.

Everything would increase Jungkook’s likelihood of taking a few souls tonight.

He slid into a seat at a random dive bar, he charmed the bartender to give him a free drink as he walked through the people. There was a woman here, she was in her early thirties. Jungkook followed her, projecting a different face to lure her in.

Jungkook approached her cooly, speaking in soft tones and shy smiles to coax her into divulging her name. He handed her the drink and she blushed softly. The poor woman was in love with her boss, who was married. There was no way they’d ever get to be together. He always felt moderately bad for these people, but before he met you he thought they almost deserved it in a sense. That’s what they got for getting their hopes up. But now....

He led her outside into an alleyway where he seduced her just a bit more. Jungkook breathed her name out, capturing her lips in a kiss, and soon her soul was traveling from her to him, absorbing into Jungkook as he caught her, laying her down on the ground. It looked like she merely had a heart attack and fell over in the alleyway.

A sad ending for her.

Kerri Jesen...

Jungkook walked away from the scene, his old persona melting off and his regular human form, although the feeling of a soul coursing through him had his heart pounding in his chest. It was a rush, almost like getting high. His head was spinning and his mind was reeling, but he knew this was simply due to the fact he hadn’t been collecting souls as frequently.

Usually demons didn’t get this kind of rush.

Jungkook was wandering the streets towards the hotel when the distinct feeling of being watched fell over him.

He didn’t stop moving, but he knew it was a witch tracking him. His mind was still a little hazy from the collection but he knew that it wasn’t supposed to last much longer. He didn’t head back to the hotel yet. He didn’t want to lead an angry witch right to you if he had a choice.

Just as he was about to turn another corner, a blade was presented to his throat. Jungkook stopped moving, the witch brandishing her blade scowling at him.

“Demon,” she spat at him.

“Witch,” he spat back.

“You murdered my sister,” she growled, slicing at him with her knife. He dodged it easily, but he really didn’t want to fight. She wasn’t going to count towards his quota so there was no point in killing her, except to get her off his back.

“I don’t know who you’re talking about,” he answered honestly.

“I saw you!” she yelled. “You were at the bar! Then you shifted,” she said, taking another deep jab at him.

He dodged again, but he could tell she was going to cause a scene with the way she was going. He had to get out and fast. When she lunged again, Jungkook took her by the wrist and threw her onto the ground and took off running. He ran towards the hotel, his only instinct was telling him to head for you.

He bolted into the elevator and then took off towards your shared room. It was almost two am, he didn’t want to wake you but he was afraid he wasn’t going to be given an option.

“Baby,” he called, walking into the room.

You were asleep on the bed, curled up right where he left you. He moved closer and kissed your shoulder. “Baby, Y/N, we gotta go,” he said, urging you to wake.

You did so slowly, exhaustion filling your limbs and making them heavier than lead. “What? What’s wrong Kook?” you murmured, reaching for him slowly.

“Need you to get up, we’ve got trouble,” he said.

Your eyes cleared and you moved to get dressed quickly. Jungkook was starting to grab your stuff when the window to your room shattered.

“Fuck!” You screamed, falling back on the floor as the witch jumped through the now broken window.

“Y/N!”

The witch stood and glared at you. You felt the hostility and rage pouring off her in waves. Whatever Jungkook did, he really really pissed her off. Without much more ceremony you stood and blocked her from Jungkook.

“What are you doing?” you asked, voice firm. “What the fuck is going on?”

“That fucking demon killed my sister-and you... you’re a fucking witch! What the hell are you doing with a demon anyways? Did you summon it?”

“Him,” you corrected. “I didn’t summon him, I’m helping return him to hell,” you stated calmly.

“And helping it return to hell involves fucking it?”

You bristled at her tone.

“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” you warned, feeling your magic swirl in your fingertips.

“Baby-”

“Don’t Jungkook, you stay behind me right now,” you stated.

The witch looked at you with curious eyes. “You love this demon?”

Jungkook’s head snapped to you as you stared straight ahead. This witch was bad news. She wasn’t from your coven, but she was from one in this region you were certain. This was exactly what you didn’t want to happen. Because now she was picking a fight with a different coven. And she knew. She knew you were falling in love with Jungkook and it was her greatest weapon against you in this moment.

You hardly had time to blink before she made her first attack, a flash of lightning directed for Jungkook. You didn’t even move in order to cast your magic, you made a ward that protected him entirely without even the lift of a finger.

“You’re strong, how old are you?” she asked, like the question was an average thing to hear from another person.

“Old enough to know when to pick my battles. I don’t want to fight with you, and Jungkook doesn’t either-”

“That demon killed my sister! I won’t let it live,” she growled.

“I won’t let him die,” you said with a deep tone. Your eyes flashed purple and you sent magical flames towards her feet. They wouldn’t burn anything but the intended target. She shrieked and jumped onto the bed, rolling and throwing a knife towards you. With a quick flash you stopped the blade in the air and turned it towards her, propelling it forward with your magic.

Jungkook was stunned to say the least. He’d never seen you use your magic like this before. He didn’t even know you were capable of this much mana manipulation and things of the like. He knew you were strong before because of how much energy you’d always been able to give him, but this was on an entirely different level.

“You’re betraying your sisters for this?!” the witch cried.

“I am,” you said, a shot of ice towards her. Elemental magic was much more complex than most witches understood, so to have you wielding it so effortlessly had Jungkook impressed all over again.

She dodged it.

“What’s your name huh? What coven do you belong to?” you asked, warding against another attack.

“My name is Maya Tudor, I’m from the Coven of Nyx Rienhardt, and we will not tolerate the murder of one of our own,” she hollered.

“You’re not supposed to act on your own,” you said, blocking more of her attacks. “You’re meant to report this to Nyx herself. She would then dispose of me how she sees fit,” you said, pushing back against her. “Acting on your own without the thought of your sisters is just as damning. Isn’t that what I’m doing? You’re acting no better than me, little witchling.”

Maya shoved back against your wards, causing you and Jungkook to stumble onto the floor. Jungkook caught you, holding you close as Maya attempted another strike when you snapped back with a whip of ice.

She cried as the magic burned her skin, causing a blister to form along her arm. “Fucking bitch!” she snarled, standing back as Jungkook pulled you to your feet.

“Come on,” he said, pulling you towards the door.

The pair of you booked it down the hallway, the sound of Maya hot on your heels made you concerned. People weren’t supposed to know witches and demons or anything in regards to the supernatural. Maya was breaking more rules than you were at this point.

Jungkook and you made it to the parking garage.

He was just trying to get you to the car so you could gather a bit of your strength to help the pair of you get away. At least for now.

“Jungkook, slow down!” you cried, stumbling over your feet.

“Can’t, we gotta get out of here Y/N,” he said, pulling harder.

“Jungkook she’s gonna hear you-fuck!”

With a pained whimper, you fell to your knees. The car was just a hundred yards away. “Y/N?!”

You held your side, as a small dagger peaked between your fingers. Jungkook kneeled with you, looking at the damage. You’d survive, he just had to get you in the fucking car.

Unfortunately, it seemed you had different plans.

You lifted yourself up onto your feet, wavering slightly as you stared at the brat of a witchling who you knew wouldn’t know any better. But honestly, this was too much. You weren’t going to lose Jungkook to her.

Yourself on the other hand...

“Enough,” you said, pulling the dagger from your side and dropping it to the floor. Maya looked at you with disdain evident in her eyes.

“I will get revenge for my fallen sister,” she growled.

“I won’t let you hurt him,” you declared firmly.

Jungkook swallowed hard. This witch was different then he’d originally anticipated. He was starting to sense a difference in her magic. You were taking most of the hits and he wondered why, up until now.

She could slay a demon with the blade she’d hit you with.

Banishing magic.

No wonder you were being so fiercely protective. One hit with those blades and Jungkook would be killed. Or at the very least, sent back to hell.

But you were already hurt, he didn’t want to see you get injured even more.

“Baby,” he called softly.

“Don’t, don’t distract me or she’s going to-”

She sent rapid fire bolts towards you that you had to work hard to dodge, messing with your orientation enough that you stumbled. Jungkook tried to support you but you waved him off. “Go, go baby, get out of here.”

Jungkook scoffed in shock. You were going to sacrifice yourself... for him?

That’s when he understood what Maya said in the hotel room.

You loved him...

Jungkook’s throat got tight as he thought about you. However, his heart didn’t race. It couldn’t, he couldn’t love you the way he is now. Even if he was more human than most demons, he was still-ultimately-a creature of chaos. A creature that didn’t have a typical set of emotions.

Although he knew... He knew deep within himself had he been human, he would love you. He’d love you with everything he was if... if only he could.

Perhaps he should do this for you. He should make the call and give you the last thing he can.

His life.

It would always be yours.

You and Maya were going back and forth. You were doing harder work, protecting yourself and Jungkook as Maya made ground with her attacks. The wound on your side was aching, and there was nothing you could do about it. Not without losing more of your energy that could be spent protecting and hopefully getting this bitch to leave you and Jungkook alone.

You were sweating, the magic energy finally starting to drain. However, the witchling didn’t look much better. If you could just hold out a little longer.

Unfortunately, there was a hidden trump card.

Maya shouted an incantation before you were surrounded with bright light. The pain hit you first as you thudded to the ground gasping, Maya had slammed you with lightning. You weren’t even able to get a ward up to protect yourself from the exhaustion coursing through your veins. Jungkook moved in front of you.

Maya stalked towards Jungkook with purpose. You whimpered from the ground, looking at him with a pained expression. He just gave you his smile before turning to face the witchling once more.

“If I let you kill me, will you leave her alone?” Jungkook asked.

“Jungkook, no!” you cried desperately.

Maya considered it for a moment. “Yes, her coven will take care of her.”

You tried to get up, sending a bolt of ice towards her once more. It threw her on her ass for a moment before she was aiming another lightning bolt in your direction.

“Y/N enough!” Jungkook said, looking back at you. “I’ll do this for you, okay?”

“No, no please don’t do that,” you begged.

Maya approached Jungkook, taking the invitation and slamming a blade into his back. With a grunt Jungkook fell to his knees.

It hurt like a bitch.

But the look on your face was infinitely worse. You looked so sad.

“Justice for my sister has been served, I will leave you to your coven.”

With that, the witchling limped off, her powers effectively drained just as much as yours. If not more so. The only reason she won is because you were doing the work of two people.

It didn’t matter now.

“Jungkook,” you cried, crawling forwards to grab him.

He was bleeding black blood, it was pouring out of the deep gash from the knife in his back. The banishing magic made it so he couldn’t heal himself. Not even your energy would save him now, not like you had enough of it to spare.

“It’s okay,” he said softly, looking up at you. “This should be enough,” he huffed.

“No, I don’t want you to die please,” you said, voice watery and eyes tearing up.

Jungkook smiled at you. “Don’t cry baby, please don’t cry-I hate it,” he said, reaching to wipe your tears with his thumb. “I’m not worth crying over.”

“You are to me!” you sobbed. “Jungkook... I lov-”

“Shhh,” he shushed you. “I don’t deserve to hear those words,” he said, laying back. “I couldn’t even use my powers to protect you because of how far I’ve let myself fall... You had to make me a fuckin potion so I could hunt, baby,” he coughed. “Don’t say those words to me, I want to say them back but I can’t...”

You were crying hard enough for your shoulders to shake. “Please Jungkook, I don’t care if you can’t say them. I don’t care,” you promised.

“I do,” he whispered. “I want to say them to you someday. But not yet, save it for then...”

You nodded, barely able to speak anymore. “Don’t go...”

Jungkook breathed out slowly. “I’ll see you... again... Promise...”

With those words, Jungkook’s human frame disintegrated into ash, his clothes left behind in your lap and the blackened blood from his wound staining your hands. You gripped his shirt and cried desperately. You cried until your head ached.

You’d lost... everything.

Jungkook woke up in a forest. He wasn’t familiar with this place.

Was he wrong? Did he not get sent back to Hell?

“Nope, you didn’t,” a calm tone called from behind him. Jungkook whipped around to see a shorter man with blonde hair looking at him with peaceful features.

“Who are you?” he asked, stumbling backwards. Where was he? And what was going on?

“I’m Jimin - and to answer those questions stumbling around in that head of yours - we are currently in purgatory,” he said.

“How-”

“Can I know what you’re thinking?” he asked, finishing Jungkook’s statement. He rolled his eyes.

“Stop that,” he demanded. “I thought I would end up in Hell, why am I in purgatory?”

Jimin sighed deeply. “It’s complicated. But, I’ll explain it the best I can... You are a demon that is being punished by the Knights of Hell for acting in the interest of a human - is that correct? You’re Jungkook?”

“Yes, I am,” Jungkook confirmed.

“Very well, then I am here to offer you a wish.”

Jungkook’s eyes widened. “A-A wish?”

Jimin smiled, eyes disappearing as he chuckled. “Yes, a wish. Just one. You were a demon that sacrificed your life for the life of another. We Angels have deemed that you are entitled to a wish for your acts,” he explained. “Choose wisely,” his voice turned serious.

Jungkook could hardly believe what he was hearing. A wish? For saving you? The woman he wanted to love. He still had this feeling in his chest that he didn't deserve it. He didn’t deserve you. But, maybe he could. If he tried. If he made his wish and found you again, would you take him back? Would you let him love you properly this time?

There was only one way to find out.

“It seems you’ve thought of a wish?” Jimin said with kind eyes.

“A life - with her,” Jungkook breathed. “I wish for a life with her.”

“It will be a human life, you won’t have any magical abilities or powers. I can give you enough money to sustain you for a time but nothing longer than a year. From there you are on your own. If you die or are injured before finding her there is nothing I can do about that,” Jimin said.

Jungkook nodded. “I want a life with her, that is my wish. As long as I can be with her that is all I want.”

“Then that is how it shall be.”

How had three years gone by already?

You asked yourself this as you wiped down a counter at your job in a local cafe. Your coven had exiled you. You were extremely lucky they didn’t kill you. But they’d taken your magic-giving you enough to leave town and never return.

With that you hadn’t looked back. You only looked ahead, the only person you wanted could be out there right now. Right this very second. You only had enough magic left for a few tracking spells, and they’d led you to the countryside. A smaller town, but big enough to hide in if necessary.

You were hoping he was here. Your magic had never steered you wrong before, you just wanted to see him again.

Was he alright? Did they hurt him in Hell? Was he still a demon or was he able to become human...

All these thoughts swirled in your head. You cleaned the counter tops and the other tables and helped your boss, Seokjin, lock up for the evening.

“Alrighty,” he said, wiping his hands off and smiling. “You’re free to head home! Felix comes in tomorrow morning so you can take the day off if you want?” he said, a twinkle in his eye.

You tilted your head but nodded regardless. “Alright...”

What an odd one this guy was, but you decided to let it go-just appreciative of the day off tomorrow as you’d been working doubles the last week.

Seokjin came closer with a smile. His irises flashed a bright neon green for just a moment. You could’ve sworn it happened but somehow you almost doubted your own eyes.

“Go home safely, Y/N, don’t worry about tomorrow here Felix will cover for you,” he said. “Have a good evening.”

With that, he placed his baseball cap on his head and trotted away.

Your mind clicked for a moment but all you could feel was appreciation.

No wonder Seokjin accepted you so quickly.

One exiled witch helps the other...

A small smile was on your face as you made your way back home to your apartment. It was tiny, but it was home and you honestly rather preferred the small space. You’d worked hard to make it cozy and welcoming and-

What the fuck?

The door wasn’t latched. You’d locked and latched that door when you came home. The only other person who had a key is Seokjin which you gave to him for emergencies only and this-

“Baby?”

Your head snapped up at the voice you thought you heard. But when you finally laid eyes on him, it was hard to believe he was actually here.

You looked at him, unable to process that he was actually there. Right there in front of you and you could just reach out and touch him but... the tears started faster.

“What...?” your voice was weak and breathless.

Jungkook stood before you, looking almost as if he’d never left. His hair was still long and curly. He was dressed in decent enough clothes, nothing fancy but he looked strong and well fed. Your heart was trembling in your chest at the mere thought of him coming back to you.

He was a demon, he didn’t have to do anything like this for a simple witch turned human. But here he was, standing inside your apartment.

“Hi...” he trailed off, looking sheepish.

“How did you...?” you asked, slowly moving closer into the apartment and out of the chill of the night. “How did you find me?”

Jungkook shut the door behind you and you turned to fling your arms around his neck. He caught you easily with a shy smile on his face.

“I’ll always find you,” he said, like in some cheesy romance movie. But it made your heart throb in longing all over again.

“Are you a demon? You don’t feel like a demon-”

Jungkook snorted at your questions, knowing that you still couldn’t quite believe he was here. He held you close by your waist, kissing your temple as you breathed him in. “Baby... I’m not a demon, I’m human, just like you,” he said.

It couldn’t be possible. You didn’t just hear those words from him. “H-Human?”

He pulled back from your embrace just enough to look into your eyes. “Look, I don’t have any demonic energy,” he said, his eyes deep brown and there was nothing underneath them but warmth.

Human.

“How?” you asked, reaching forward to touch his face with a shaky hand. He held your hand against his face and leaned into your touch.

“Because I didn’t want to live without you,” he said. “I wound up in purgatory, and Angel granted me a wish due to me sacrificing my life for yours-I wished for... for a life with you, because my time with you-well... I only got a taste of it and I want more, I want more of those days like the ones at my place. I just want to be with you.”

Tears thatched along your lashes as you pulled him closer again.

“Can I say it now?” you whispered against his chest.

Jungkook laughed softly and kissed your head. “I hope to hear it often,” he said, leaning down and pulling you into a sweet kiss. “But wait just a bit longer,” he said, kissing you again.

You were wrapped up into his embrace as he pulled you back towards the couch. You eagerly followed, letting the moment of your reunion fuel this passion boiling in your stomach.

Jungkook kept kissing you, almost as if he were trying to remember every inch of your lips. His hands trailed down your body, squeezing and moaning softly at the alluring softness. “Fuck... Fuck baby,” he grit out.

A teasing smile made its way onto your face. “Yeah? What do you want, Kook?” you nudged your nose against his. You sat down on the couch and pulled him closer by his pants.

He sucked his lower lip between his teeth, watching with hazy eyes as you fished his hardening cock out of his pants. “Please baby, suck my cock for me, missed your pretty mouth so much,” he said, running his thumb from your jaw to your throat and pressing gingerly.

Your lips ran over his cock tantalizingly and Jungkook had to swallow to make sure he didn’t cum on your face. He hadn’t been touched since the last time you two were together and having human stamina now made it a little harder to refrain from his eagerness.

But, Jungkook knew what patience meant, so he calmed himself but his cock was heavy and throbbing in your hands.

“Fuck... must hurt to be this hard,” you said, and before he could growl at you to get started you swallowed his cock with practiced ease. You ran your hands up under his shirt and dragged your nails down his lower stomach while you sucked his cock deeper into your throat.

Jungkook’s hand made it into your hair, gripping it as you bobbed your head to pleasure him. He sighed out harshly through his nose and you knew he was enjoying it. If you could smile you would’ve, his little tells were still the same. He smirked down at you, watching as your pretty eyes locked with his.

“Suck it so well baby, always so good for me my angel,” he groaned, voice turning whiny at the end. “Fuck!”

You took his balls in your hand and palmed them gently. Jungkook’s eyes rolled back in his head, breaths coming out short and stilted at your pleasuring him. You pulled off him for a moment to catch your breath. “Love sucking your cock baby, love it so much,” you smiled.

Jungkook laughed a breath out and ran his thumb over your bottom lip. You bit on it gently causing him to smile. “You wet for me?” he asked, his eyes sparkling.

You dropped his cock and quickly pulled your pants off as you sat on the couch. Jungkook mirrored your actions, taking his clothes off as you laid yourself on the couch with your knees up, hiding the place he wanted the most right now.

Now, Jungkook wasn’t above begging. In fact, he rather enjoyed it from time to time. He crawled to you, naked and smiling. His hands wound around your calves and squeezed them gently before placing kisses along your shins and ankles.

“Please baby,” he said, lips trailing along your skin and leaving goosebumps in their wake. “Please open your legs?” he asked, voice sweet and pleading. “Gonna let me eat this pussy? Want my tongue on you?”

You smiled and pulled him in for a kiss while opening your legs so he could touch. He kissed you passionately before leaving tender smooches along the soft swells of your skin. Your breasts first, capturing a nipple between his sinfully sweet lips as his hand trailed to your dripping pussy. He let out a desperate breath against your chest when he pushed a finger inside your heat. “Fuck, fuck baby your pussy-fuck,” he said, moving from your chest to your core with deft movements.

Jungkook looked at your core swallowing his fingers and you couldn’t help the mewls falling from your lips. “B-Baby!” you whined softly, running your hand through his hair.

“Yeah,” he breathed against your core. His eyes flicked up to yours and they swirled with hunger. “What is it baby?”

You swallowed hard, biting your lip. “Eat me baby? Please, so needy for you,” you begged.

One of your favorite things about sex with Jungkook was he could be in charge one moment, then the next second you could take it from him. It made the intimacy between the two of you spontaneous and alluring. Jungkook knew you just as well as you knew him and that was exciting. It made you cry for him, begging for the pleasure and bliss you knew only he could give you.

“Alright angel, lean back and let me make you cum,” he said, pulling you closer by your thighs so he could eat your pussy the way he wanted. He placed several warm kisses along your inner thighs before running his tongue through your folds with a fat lick to your clit. You cried softly for him to continue, which he did.

Jungkook made each lick on your center hotter than the last, running his tongue over your clit differently each time. Your feet twitched when he sucked on your core with his plush lips. “Fuck, fuck-Jungkook!” you whimpered, pulling his hair back and away from his face so you could see his flushed face between your thighs.

“Taste so good baby,” he moaned, smiling before licking into your cunt once more.

“K-Koo,” you said. “Please baby, wanna cum,” you moaned sweetly.

His chest throbbed at the sound of your pleased noises. He really wasn’t sure if what he felt with you before was love, but now? Now he knew it wasn’t, because the feeling in his chest... the one taking home in his heart right now was absolutely love.

“I’ll get you there baby,” he promised, sucking your clit into his mouth. He pushed two fingers inside you this time, making your stomach clench in bliss.

“Yeah~ Right there Kook, right there baby please!”

He worked you up further and further, pushing his fingers along with his tongue to create a tension in your belly that had you fit to burst. But just as you would feel yourself cresting to that perfect orgasm waiting for you, he’d slow down or remove his mouth from you entirely.

After the third time you cried at him for it.

“Koo! Baby, please-lemme cum, wan’ it,” you begged, your hairline was sweaty and Jungkook smiled at your desperate sounding voice.

“Tell me one thing baby, then I’ll let you cum,” he said, working you up for the fourth time.

“Anything baby, anything you want.” Your weak tone made him smirk.

“Tell me you love me baby, say you love me and I’ll make you cum,” he said, moving over you to kiss your lips while his fingers still played between your legs.

Your heart stammered in your chest at his request. But it was an easy smile that made it to your face as you answered him after your kiss. “I love you,” you murmured, kissing him with those beautiful words fresh from your lips.

He wanted to kiss those words, he wanted to kiss you and tell you the same... “Baby, Y/N,” he breathed, capturing your lips in a reverent kiss. “I love you,” he said.

Jungkook was stunned at how simple it was to say, and yet it made his heart quake. “I love you, Y/N,” he repeated.

“Jungkook,” you gasped when he pulled his fingers from you to put them in your mouth. You cleaned them as he seemed to want and he moaned with the need to be inside you. Although you were just as eager. Your hand reached down to pump his woefully neglected cock. Jungkook moaned against your temple, hips rutting slightly at the stimulation.

“Want me to put it in now?” he asked, voice breathless.

“Yes,” you whined.

Jungkook didn’t make you wait, taking his cock and lining it up with your soaking pussy. He gave you a look and you just nodded, giving him your consent and with that he pushed inside slowly. You both moaned in pleasure. “Fuck... fuck you’re so wet,” he panted.

“Jungkook!” you cried out. He kissed you desperately then, his mouth searching and hot against your own.

“M’right here baby, always gonna be right here,” he said, voice tender against your skin.

You mewled at his gentle thrusts to open you up. It was so much and yet not enough. “More,” you pleaded with him, hands finding his back.

A sharper thrust made your eyes roll back. “Right there?” he asked, eyes wild and chest heaving. He’d been holding off really well but now that he was inside of your pussy it was game over. He loved being inside of you like this far too much. “Baby your pussy feels so good. Fuck, fuck please,” he gasped.

You smiled at his frantic features. He didn’t want to cum without you. It was sweet, but he really didn’t need to worry. You had almost cum just from him putting it in.

“Jungkook, c-close,” you said, eyes watery and pretty in the evening light.

He nodded. “I’m right there too,” he whispered, thrusting harder and harder into you. It had you seeing stars. He kissed you, sucking on your lips and tangling your tongues together. “Yes, yes, fuck...”

The tightening in your stomach was finally on the verge of snapping once more. Jungkook was whispering sweet words into your ears as he pounded you against your couch. “Fuck-fuck!” you sobbed, arms wrapped around his neck as he covered your body.

You felt a heat in your belly as your orgasm rushed through your body in deep pulses. Jungkook was stunned as you creamed his cock, pulling him along shortly into his own climax as he painted your walls white with his release.

He groaned your name against your neck, shivering and gently coaxing the pair of you through your two highs. You turned your head to kiss him, smiling softly.

“Holy shit,” he laughed, looking at you with a dizzying smile. “Give me a second baby, your pussy almost killed me.”

You snorted at him, kissing him once more regardless. “I missed you,” you said tenderly, pulling him closer. Even as his cock softened inside of you.

Jungkook kissed you back, cradling your head as he pulled out. His eyes met yours and he gave a sweet smile. “I missed you too, but I’ll be here from now on... I’m yours, if you want me.”

“I’ve always wanted you, Jungkook,” you said, kissing his jaw and relishing in the afterglow that was settling into your warm body.

“Keep me then,” he said with a smile.

“I’ll keep you-forever...”

#bangtan sorciere #52hertz #bts #bts smut #jungkook #jungkook smut #demon jungkook #jungkook x reader #reader insert #Bts fanfic #bts fantasy au #witch reader #jessika hathaway

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theoccultz · 7 months

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Why do people crush on you ?

A reading on what attract others to you ?

General reading ,take what resonates leave what doesn't

Psychic reading

LGBTQIA+ friendly

Pics not mine credits to their rightful owners

Take a deep breath and select your pile !!

Posted on : Sep 26,2023

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Pile l . Cake

Let me know which pile you selected!! your likes ,comments,reblogs & feedbacks are appreciated (:

People find you exciting to be around,i'm getting saggitarius vibe its a giddy feeling like others know its gonna be a fun and stimulating night in your presence ,others can feel you have a great sense of fashion and that you hold a lot of knowledge and wisdom within you , you have androgenous vibe to you, you attract different kinds of people, people find you really endearing pile 1 they see you as someone courageous someone who'll stand up for them , someone who's a great companion to be around.others could talk about you A LOT ,you remind them of various things ,People find you relatable you could post things that can relate to many or you say certain things which in this age is obvious but oblivious to recognise at the same time and it could put others into a reflective mode . people feel like you've got it all like you never back down from challenges you show an enormous amount of resilience , i'm getting cloudy rainy day vibes that's how comforting it is .

You could show compassion to " yourself" and others could know abt it or they pick up from your vibe there's a really comforting vibe to you ,you could heal depths of others subconscious just by sharing your energy and experiences with them , very interesting i'm picking up that people want to fight you because they wanna prove to you , gain your approval anyhow, they're really persistent on the idea of wanting your validation now there's a catch either you are really intelligent & articulate on many levels or either its people feeling they need to match upto certain standards of reality. Others could see you as someone who's peaceful like you will find a solution you have an impact on others idealistic view i feel like you have a real take on things you could have felt like growing up you're alienated , different from others where they see 6 you see 9 and now you're proud of the fact that you dont go about things one-way. Your kindness is deeply appreciated.

Others see that you remember little things about them you are the person who they can sit in silence without feeling uncomfortable . Others think you have a really unique face like those who look like birds *SOME PEOPLE DO LOOK LIKE BIRDS *lol overall appealing to look at ,others feel like you have manners like you just dont talk the talk you have gone through it yourself , others could feel sad if they loose you because you're a great person and it'd be upsetting to losea great part of yourself y'know something that makes you happy ...i feel like you can shift energy of the room you're giving me really sweet lover vibes like that friend who's leaning in to hug , tugging your hairs , lookin' into your eyes 👁️ . Thats really sweet honestly.

You could suffer from imposter syndrome feel like you're not valued enough or you're invisible to others but no others defend you in your absence😤you're really important to them, believe that you're a good person pile one you heal many hearts. Yeah i could go on & on there's just a lot to say ,lets stop here(:

Things that could resonate w/you :

Mars in 6th house ,chappy lios ,butch , classy ,cindy ,ground nuts , foil , childlike spirit , ballon ,dior , pet parrot , orange car, authentic, relient ,new jersey , authoritive, sweet lemon , sharp confused eye look , malfunction , delivery, 5 months , loca shakira, night owl , city lights movie , late night drive ,writer , publisher , braids ? , europe , Amsterdam ,south africa , onethek? One take? Switzerland, Syria , Manchester , India ,russia , messi, serpamt tatto or ring , sportsmanship,pretty woman ~mino , sappho ,lauren ,R - 5- 9 -2 , 6:00 clock ,rap jazz , attended a show fest .

Song that matches your vibe: new moon

Thanks for reading!!

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Pile ll -Zero

Let me know which pile you selected!! your likes ,comments,reblogs & feedbacks are appreciated (:

Ah don't underestimate the power of zero , everything begins with zero

You remind people of nostalgic memories mostly joyful one's ...when others was experiencing life and not surviving it , people could really find your presence to be enticing you could be sassy and upfront , you guys could be my witches i see you hate wasting your time on surface level relationships, you are remembered by others for a really long time for instance ..oh this person was so mischevious and playful when they were little yeah i really feel like others miss being in your presence a lot

Others really love to tease you a lot they think behind that tough macho exterior there's a really gentle spirit wanting to unleash its potential, i heard smoking mirrors others could not meet you or see you around a lot there's a need to get to know you or want to spend time with you like others cant get enough you could find yourself feeling quite overwhelmed at times because of this , i found myself stutering others could really feel the energy of do not mess with me ,do not project your shit on me lol

I feel like there were some people in your life who didn't treated you right and you found yourself securing little aspects that others really love ..that could surprise you pile 2 but even if you're quirky , weird , mysterious you're still worth it and others do tend to lookout for you a lot. Others feel like nothing can escape from you ,you are keen on little things ,others feel like they can build a lot with you like people think longterm with you , congrats 👏 pile 2 not many of us trigger that within people to settle down or appreciate things as they are not constantly worrying about realigning things , being okay with enough. Others see that you work on yourself and you're unafraid of judgements ,thats so powerful pile2. Keep going.

I feel like you have seen a lot in your life you know how to go about things now but it wasn't always like this and i respect your patience and your ability to have faith in yourself, you value little to little things and others tend to be drawn by these little yet impactful habits of yours ...lol its cute. Others really see you as moving forward than backwards you are not stuck in your way ,you are sure competitive and a builder of your own world but there's always space for everyone who's seeking home, people remember you for a long time pile2 you're not a forgetten memory . You remind me very much of "libra energy and octopus" because they have these sensitive touch and they are so intelligent with sense of boundaries its amazing.

I honestly cant describe you in words i'm being reminded of water panther (mishipeshu) and i honestly dont know how to describe that energy . I feel like i said too much but didn't said enough.

Random things i heard:

Eros , literature, mathodical, coffee , strangers from hell , darren , sensitivity,sweet , melancholic, Mariposa Ave, suite , deligent , bambii , casanova , tone , sprite , notorious, horror ,trivia ,story , m , 7 ,5 ,8 ,2 , master manipulator , kinky , nest think of it more as a message and monkey Chinese.

Song that matches your vibe: tempted

Thanks for reading !!

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Pile lll-Hypnotise

Let me know which pile you selected!! your likes ,comments,reblogs & feedbacks are appreciated (:

There's a lot of emphasize on energy ,you are reminding me of an introverted actress who looks like she's anxious but oh the way she talks and presents herself she's so charming,she always give me the energy of looking for more not underestimating herself she's someone who's searching to play vital role in others life , she's soulsearching .

People could just feel a lot around you you could notice others kind of reorganising their stuff or trying to get things in order as if they are creating space in their energy for you yeah fuck this is so beautiful , others find you interesting usually in the first meeting Others can see how hardworking and interesting you are to the core , people recognise you deeply you can open anyones vulnerable heart ,you are comfortable to be around but not easy you could look a certain way but you're not all that there's a depth in you that's unreachable , your spirit reminds me of cobra and starfish its really sweet ,looks untouchable something interesting but like hurting you this much was worth it ? Its like people feel like you're a good person and that you are right for defending yourself against all odds .

You could be outcasted at a young age ,criticised for behaving like how a child is suppose to behave, others could have really pressursed you into taking responsibility or felt ircked by not having you lured into their shadow yeah i feel as though you despise this part of you in the early stages of development but now you understand its not you its ' them ' ,you have this i'm here to start a revolution not afraid to get things messed up and just be myself and that's really attractive you are the typa person who i'd tell my friend to bring again for the meet-up there's just so much to unfold,your energy speaks for itself and you dont need to be ashamed of that ,you know how to discipline others there's authority to you .

Others feel overprotective and sometimes underwhelmed as well because its frustrating to just feel things and not discover anything any soon it raises a lot of questions i'd even go as far to say others could find your vulnerable self beautiful cause how dare i be in your presence i feel less uff

That was intense its like i was walking on eggshells i didn't wanted to hurt you

People like you cause you're " heartless " lol in a sarcastic way ,you are not what they hear ,you are just like others though more intense ,more honest with yourself , with others ....thence sparking curiousity . honestly i feel like others really dont fuck with your inner child experience . There's a different side to you that seems decieving i mean ofc everyone is but no ones honest abt it .you remind me those moms who didn't wanted pet but hey look who's children it is now... lol cute .

Extra messages i heard:

Pretty little liar , cant get enough of you ,need morr time , lacking patience ,seeks reliability, advanced technology, do your own research ,like you better ,mars in 5th house , recent solar return, pluto 3rd4th house , stigma , give him first, courtesy, merry , jeremy , lisa , kristoffer , present, love , invention ,555,909, 812 lesson , extraordinary*saas* universal experience, heritage ,albania , not Usually seen or known , athletic, overpowering, educated , seek for deeper understanding, not cold but cool , defense mechanism, s ,y ,aquarius , light :the healer ,maron , wareen warning? Tag, archive. Your piles messages was so random .

Song that matches your vibe: fuck my life

Thanks for reading!!

#Spotify #pick a card #tarotblr #pick a pile #spirituality #tarot reading #intuiative reading #psychic reading #free tarot #pick a card reading #tarot pick a card #pick a picture #vd #crush tarot #crush reading

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dollarstorefern · 4 months

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ok, so i’ve been thinking about the whole food/love symbolism in house, (i’m not sure who the first person to mention this symbolism was, but i love them so much. if anyone knows please mention them!!!) and there's one more specific element that i want to overanalyze, so just bear with me for a moment; there were four people that directly interacted with house when he was cooking in wilson's apartment (episode 3 season 6): cuddy, thirteen, wilson, and a random lady from the cooking class house and wilson took together. and i feel like these four best represent how house's love is spread. just hear me out for a second you guys.

first, you have cuddy. she comes to house and he happens be cooking; however, she never tastes the food he’s preparing. they love each other, he has love FOR her, but it's never the right time for them. (house and cuddy have such an insane and doomed relationship that i don’t think i quite understand myself tbh).

for the random lady, she's cooking *with* house when cuddy is there. this one isn’t as clean/sensible as the others, but i’m sure at least one person will get what i’m trying to say or be able to word this better. house has a certain level of understanding and care for others/strangers, but on a very grudging level. his love isn't necessarily made just for them, they'll never know the depth or spontaneity of it, and they'll never know what it means like the people close to house do.

with wilson, wilson wakes up to house cooking. house shoves the food in wilson's face, not listening to a word that wilson has to say. and wilson just goes with it! and i believe that it’s around here that house admits that he stayed up all night cooking because he was in pain, but i could be wrong. if that is the case though, that just ties into the whole idea that all of house’s strongest emotions are directly tied to his pain, all of his actions are fueled by his pain, which makes his love even more insane if you think about it. (i wish i was as eloquent as some of the other house fans on here when talking about this stuff but i only ever think about it when half-awake).

and lastly, there's thirteen. she visits house to ask for advice. and you see how precise he's being with the cooking. i don’t remember quite what he was making, something to do with chicken embryos or yolks, and extracting some of the yolk to squeeze sauce in there, something along those lines. pretty precise stuff. and thirteen tries it and says that it's the best thing she's ever eaten. quick and positive interaction.

so. we only see *two* people eat his food in this episode. two people who know what his love is like: wilson, the man that house depends on to even exist, and thirteen, basically the only character that (at this point in the show) has a chance of understanding house’s suffering, to some degree (house dreading the pain that comes with simply existing, knowing each day will be filled with pain, thirteen dreading every day, knowing that her huntingtons can only get worse and one day she’ll lose control).

also, this isn’t to say that house doesn’t/hasn’t loved other characters!!! i personally just feel like the relationships he has with wilson, cuddy, and thirteen are some of the most significant on screen relationships we see. (maybe i’m a bit biased because i adore wilson and thirteen, but we’ll ignore that).

anyways. all of this was likely just coincidence, but i don’t quite care! it’s the coincidences that make for the most meaningful portrayal of characters, in my humble (questionable) opinion!

#house md #hate crimes md #gregory house #james wilson #lisa cuddy #remy thirteen hadley #hilson #house md nonsense

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whetstonefires · 2 months

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Honestly the most interesting thing about the Jiang interpersonal dynamics that is being totally slept on is how Jiang Fengmian's power as head of the family affects everyone, including him.

Yu Ziyuan knows Jiang Fengmian won't use his power against her unless he feels like he needs to, and that he doesn't fear her and isn't going to feel like he needs to act in self-defense unless she attempts significant physical harm, so short of that she can do whatever she likes against him, and he won't resist.

But if the collateral damage to the kids of her verbal attacks on him goes above a certain level, he says one word and she stops.

He just goes, 'wife.' ('My lady' but it's just a polite term for wife.) Sort of disapproving. Same kind of way he talks to Jiang Cheng when he acts like a shithead, but without the subsequent attempt at an ethics lesson.

And bam. Momentum halted. That line of attack is out of bounds. Nobody likes this, but good god it works.

And because they both know he ultimately has all the power, that Yu Ziyuan's lifestyle of privacy and doing exactly as she pleases at all times and so forth is all something that exists by Jiang Fengmian's generosity and sufferance, and she hates it, and he's not comfortable with it either, he sets that boundary really high, and she gets away with all kinds of cruelty because it's all stuff she's strictly allowed to do, entitled to do. So he'd be abusing his authority over her, by constraining her right to exercise her power within normative bounds over the people she outranks.

Even if she's using it harmfully and in a way directed by spite, these are her rights, she's not technically abusing her power, and her primary target in all the episodes he actually witnesses is him who outranks her; she's not being one of those mistresses.

So he'd be overstepping if he tried to constrain her, he'd be one of those husbands. Just like she always accuses him of.

(This is why she keeps insisting that she's also the master of jiang sect and he's 'forgetting' that in contexts where it doesn't make a huge amount of sense.)

Anyway, the fact that it's impossible to unpick where Jiang Fengmian's moral principles stop and his conflict-avoidance kicks in with this relationship is so much more interesting than the weirdly sexist readings I keep seeing, where it's all the conflict-avoidance and he's an unmanly loser who lets Yu Ziyuan bully him and his kids without ever standing up to her, for no good reason. When actually they have a really interesting and fantastically realistic toxic relationship.

He has a good reason! His reason is he's uncomfortable with the patriarchy! And guilty that his wife is miserable! And that he doesn't love her correctly! So he gives way as often as he can, trying to fix it!

But it doesn't fix it, because no amount of giving in to her gives her cause to trust him, and if she doesn't trust him and she knows that if he actually cares about an issue her ability to get her way will disappear, she can't feel secure about any of it. And therefore everything, especially Wei Wuxian the symbol of that fact, makes her angry and Want To Punish.

#hoc est meum #mdzs #yu ziyuan #jiang fengmian #jiang family #i am OBSESSED with them #meta #marriage #gender #character meta

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ghcstao3 · 1 month

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Hi would a Demigod 141 AU with SoapGhost be a weird promt? All of the 141 are demigods who joined the military and Price collects them into a taskforce to try and keep them safer then not.

This doesn’t have to be Percy Jackson themed but it is what spawned the idea.

Have a great day

not at all weird! but it's just going to be general greek demi-gods because i know very little about percy jackson (also i am so so sorry for how late this is)

Perhaps Price should have figured earlier that wrangling a group of demi-gods together wouldn’t be so easy.

The bastards would always be difficult to track down, of course, but he'd at least hoped that with his ability as Captain to cut through red tape and see everything hidden behind those thick, black redacted bars, the task may be just be a little less daunting.

But alas.

John "Soap" MacTavish is both the easiest to find and most willing to be recruited for Price's to-be task force; the former, of course, due to his... explosive nature.

Being a son of Ares, his penchant for fire and C4 and battle were not something to be overlooked; Price thought his enthusiasm and skill were something he immediately wanted on and for his team—even if he'd been discouraged by Soap's previous superiors about his bouts of insubordination.

(Years down the line, Price would discover he very seldom had an issue in that regard—the kid just had a better idea of the worth of certain calls.)

The next, recruited with only slightly more difficulty and an unimpressive amount of persuading on Price's part, was Kyle "Gaz" Garrick—one of Athena's sons, his moral compass and eye for strategy were unbelievably solid, if incredibly unshakeable.

Thankfully, he isn't nearly as impulsive as MacTavish, instead keen on a level-head and using only sharp words and well-disguised insults to influence what may originally stand as poorly-thought out ideas. He'd been skeptical, at first, about joining a team with other demi-gods, fearful the potential butting of heads would only mean mortal destruction—but, ultimately, he came around to it, partly because he'd already previously worked with Price.

And lastly, the most headache-inducing endeavour—Simon "Ghost" Riley.

The man was naturally elusive, especially considering a past suffered that most wouldn't wish upon their worst enemy, but actually recruiting him had been an entirely different problem in and of itself. But Price was determined.

Ghost takes to his callsign in far more likeness than Price would have preferred, always having disappeared by the time the captain finally finds an updated contact—and, much to his dismay, Ghost would often leave men temporarily incapacitated if only to rid himself of Price’s insistence just a bit longer. An insistent lone wolf type.

It takes the Gaz and Soap along with Price to be any kind of successful, and even then Ghost's acceptance is reluctant—but Price can work with that. Maybe it'd take time, but it was certainly more doable than a flat out refusal from a man who had once singlehandedly destroyed a prominent cartel.

Although, perhaps Price should first start with bothering Laswell about finally telling him Ghost's true lineage. Maybe then he’d have something of substance to work with, rather than basing his assumptions on the generic but perfected skills of a soldier.

Or maybe he should begin by investigating the way Ghost and Soap already seem awfully close, despite claiming to have never met prior.

Either way—Price can only hope the task force would work out, for all this effort to not go to waste.

#ask #captain john price #kyle gaz garrick #simon ghost riley #john soap mactavish #writing #task force 141

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madwomansapologist · 2 months

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doubt comes in | bg3 companions

Meet Kind!Druid!Tav | More Weirdos | AO3

synopsis: You knew exactly what would welcome you back to camp. The alluring smell of Gale's cooking, the awful noises of Lae'zel working on a sword that don't need to be sharpened, Wyll practicing his dance moves. You clearly weren't expecting to see yourself. Or to be forced into fighting the companions you swore to never harm in order to prove Orin was playing with their minds. [3.4K]

warnings: orin being orin. well, you, actually. "prove who's the real you" trope. i mean imagine the level of anxiety that scenario induces because you want me to act like me? kitten, mommy don't fucking know who she is. bg3 level of violence. a lot of blood. body horror should be a tag? tav suffers slashing damage, but orin suffers psychic damage. angst. happy ending. shadowheart x tav x halsin. companions (lae'zel, astarion, gale, wyll, karlach, jaheira, minsc). camp followers (yenna, scratch, grub). background (orin, gortash, mizora, shar, cazador, silvanus).

Reaching Baldur's Gate didn't made life easier, but Gods did it helped. Danger is near, sometimes closer than a kiss, but this city is still your home. They can try, but no one can take that away from any of you.

Mizora can bargain and dissemble, but no lie coming from her burning lips will ever change the fact Wyll would do anything for this city. He had his first kiss in one of those bars. Gortash is a threat, but did he started counting his days? Karlach is coming for him, and he had it coming. She can still remember the vinegar taste on her mouth after her first spree.

Shar had her time to mess with Shadowheart's memories, to turn goodness into fear and desires into guilty. Shadowheart is learning how to swin. Long ago, before Cazador could even think of looking at him, Astarion walked on those streets. Cazador can see him as a walking corpse if he so desire, something that fell into decay, but Astarion is alive and free forever and evermore.

The world is a freaking mess, but so be it. That won't stop you from living. That won't stop any of you.

"Soldier! Over here," Karlach called for you, up on The Blushing Mermaid's balcony. You dodged the drunkards and ran upstairs to their table. They saved a seat for you. They always do. "What took you so long?"

They're always teasing you for being so controlling with their gold. That was an act of survival, to save for what matters, but now that you reached the city... You're still controlling it, Silvanus knows Astarion would waste it all without noticing, but you can allow your party some luxury from time to time.

You put the bags under the table, careful to not let them see what was inside them. "Just lost track of time," you sat between her and Minsc. "Did I miss much?"

You turned around, looking for a waiter, but a glass was dragged from across the table towards you. Halsin, sitting across from you at the round table, had already ordered your favorite drink. He always knows what you want even before you say it.

Your smile was subtle, the glass already rising to hide your mouth. You didn't use words to thank him, but your foot met his under the table. You dragged it along his leg, a hidden affection. A secret between you two.

"Oh, yes, Boo. Minsc agrees, her smile really seens different," Minsc whispered. Boo moved on his shoulder, sniffing around. "What are you hiding, my gentle friend?"

Perfume of night orchids, clothes fit for a vampire or whatever Astarion means by that, a recently released tome of evocation, instruments to improve weapons, a music box for a dancing hero, owlbear cub plush, new whittling knifes, a book about adventures Jaheira wasn't part of but is still somehow the main character, and stone sculpture of a certain miniature giant space hamster. "Nothing," you answered.

Halsin chuckled. "There is nothing you can't do, my heart. Except by lying, I must add."

"I just bought a few presents," it sounded almost defensive. Alright, maybe you really were a bit too controlling of the gold. Just a bit. "I'll give them after dinner."

Karlach chocked on her beer. "Are you feeling well, soldier? Have anyone forced you to waste your precious gold?"

"There is a hero coming through to help you, my friend," Minsc hit the table with closed fists. Your drink almost fell on your lap. "Tell Minsc who forced you and his boot shall find your wrongdoer!"

Karlach and Minsc tried to see what were in the bags during the walk back to camp, and you protected them with your life. They started a game of guessing what you had bought, never realizing you weren't participating on it.

Halsin took the bags from you, and with his free hand caressed yours. He kissed your knuckles, then your forehead. You melted against his touch. "Is it duck related?"

You chuckled, eyes still closed. "Fuck off, Bear."

Finally at camp, Halsin followed you to your tent .You saw when Wyll walking out of his tent, hair dripping wet, and smiled at him. Karlach and Minsc sat by the bonfire, still arguing about the possibility of receiving an ax as a gift.

You told Halsin to close his eyes so you could hide everything. "Alright, done."

You walked towards the bonfire, but Halsin grabbed your hand and pulled you closer. You linked your arms around his neck, ready to stand on tiptoe. "It's on your black chest, isn't it?"

You sighed, walking away from him. He tried to stop you, but you dodged Halsin easily. "Of course not," you lied. And he could tell.

You used a branch to stir the fire. You had the feeling it would be a cold night. Yenna was near it, stroking Grub's fur, and smiled at you. So young, so innocent. So unfair.

Lae'zel and Jaheira carried pans with food to the large table Gale conjured, and nodded on your direction. "Fifteen minutes, cub," said Jaheira. "Weren't you on watch?"

You denied with a movement of your head. Jaheira isn't the one to get confused with watches, neither are you. After all, you both organized all shifts.

"Are you hungry?" You stroke Yenna's hair, ignoring Grub in order to not scare him away. Kneeled in front of her, you threw the branch far away. Scratch ran to catch it. "I have strawberry and hon..."

"What the fuck is that?!"

You turned to Karlach, your sword suddenly so heavy on your side. She looked perfectly fine. Following her gaze, you understood it.

Shadowheart had her spear on hands, back from first watch to supper. And besides her, with a hand on the half-elf's waist, stood you.

One thing you can't deny Orin: that bitch is creative. You admit, it was smart. Half of the party left with you, half stayed at camp. It was only a matter of chosing the right moment to appear, making sure to say only the right words, and everything would work on her favor.

Smart, until she wasn't anymore. Because instead of aiming your companions quietly without raising doubts, you are back now. She is surrounded by the enemy. Cornered by her own actions.

You smiled to Yenna, her scared eyes shone upon you. "I need you to close your eyes. Can you do that for me?" As she put her tiny hands in front of her face, you raised from the floor. The smile was still there. "Orin."

She was behind you, but you knew Karlach made Nyrulna find a way to her hands. He's not on your vision field, but you promise Silvanus you'll kill yourself right then and there if Minsc and Boo aren't ready to fight and die beside you. The golden light on your periphery in theory could be from anything, but you knew it was Halsin waiting for your command to transform and attack.

The things you couldn't see didn't surprised you. Quite the opposite.

Jaheira's eyes shone, and without hesitation she turned into a fire myrmidion. Wyll, before careless, casted an armor on himself. Lae'zel had her sword on her back, but her movements showed she was nothing but ready.

They were looking at you.

As easy as that you understood. You're always thinking on the great scheme of things, careful about every movement and choice so at the end nothing will stop you from defeating the Absolute, but this isn't a game of Go. Orin didn't proposed a bet, one where all moves matter and any choice could change the final outcome. No. This is as simple as tic-tac-toe. The results depends only on doing the right first movement.

Orin isn't surrounded here.

You are.

Shadowheart hesitated, the spear uncomfortable on her hands, her skin paler. She gazed at you, at that thing, and you could almost see the doubt replacing the new found glow in her eyes.

"You finally decided to show up again," Orin said. She could immitate your voice perfectly. Even the words were something that could've been said by you. "Now we don't need to hunt you down."

You kept on staring at Shadowheart, ignoring her stained words. "Lua, you know who I truly am." You drew your sword, the golden glow illuminating your face within the light of the setting sun. "Fight beside me, my love. Like you have always done."

"Don't fall for her theatrics," replied Orin. If you didn't knew better, even you would fall for her tricks. "She is playing with your mind. Trying to control it like many attempt to before. Don't allow it."

In a quick motion, her spear cut through Orin's torso. Orin, you, stumbled back. You stood in front of Shadowheart, protecting her with your body from the changeling's response.

All Orin did was to add pressure to the cut. "Get away from her!" A necrotic energy came from her fingers, the same you are so used to control. You shouldn't have left your shield on your tent. "My love, she'll only hurt you."

Jaheira aimed at you, lava dripping from her transformed hand, but didn't attack because of how close Shadowheart was of you. Karlach got further away, now with a better view of camp. Minsc had his sword in hands, just as Wyll had a cloud of darkness aiming at him. Lae'zel was in front of Orin, eyes filled with determination.

They moved faster than you wanted to. The board getting new possibilities, and you worst problems to deal with. What strategy can overpower hers?

"On sight, soldier," Karlach screamed from distance. You could picture the spear on her hands, ready to be throw right in Orin's eyes. "One word."

"Ckh. Enough," ordered Lae'zel. "Pull yourself together before I pull you apart."

"That changeling is playing tricks with your mind, Lae'zel," said Shadowheart. Light came from her fingers. "Don't let her fool you."

"I know my leader," was her response. "You should know too, cleric."

"Can't any of you see her true goal?" Your voice echoed through the camp. "She isn't just trying to end me. She could've done this before, we all now she had chances. Orin wants you to fight one another, to break our bonds and divide us. Stay still, stay alert, and she won't have a choice but to end her disguise and attack with her own claws. Patience: that's the only thing she does not have."

With the noise, Gale and Astarion came out of the kitchen. "Who is..." Astarion didn't even had time to finish.

"It's me," you yelled. You had even forgot about them. Just more players for a game that should be won alone. "For Silvanus, I even said goodbye to each and every of you befo..."

You swear you saw a smirk on your duel's face. She fooled you too. "You fucking bitch."

You barely had closed your mouth when red strings of energy passed right beside you. Shadowheart's illuminated fingers were surrounded by darkness now. Gale's work, you knew.

"She is right," Lae'zel's words made you breath easier. It was more than just a smart move, it was a great plan, but Orin won't suceed for a very simple reason: her main goal is to hurt, and yours is to prevent it. Lae'zel stepped closer, her longsword in hands and eyes on Orin. "The wizard shouldn't have aimed at the Shadowheart, neither was she supposed to fight."

A sign of trust coming from her of all people could convince them all. Lae'zel cares, deeply, and wouldn't do something without being sure of it. You glared at the others, hoping Lae'zel's words had calmed them down. And it did. Their eyes were softer towards you. But those weren't the eyes you should've been watching closely.

You didn't saw when she moved. Didn't noticed the smell of danger floating on the air so near you. Didn't heard anything that would've warned you to defend yourself.

But you felt as Lae'zel rip your chest apart.

So much blood. You never would've guessed a mortal vessel could carry so much blood. It stained the silver, dripping from the longsword, splashed her face. It ran down your body, penetrated the ground and its roots, fed the plants..

Red. It was all you could see. All you could think about. Your lungs only had space for it. They burned. Your trembling hands moved towards your ripped belly, your insides staining them, and held the sword. It cut your palms.

"Bloodlust won't solve our problems," someone said. You knew that voice. Was it yours? Lae'zel forced the sword down, then pulled it out of you. "The changeling's is all we need to spill."

You were on your knees. Did you fell? Were you kicked? Are you praying? You must be. You probably were. Who do you pray to? Have you ever prayed before?

Kneeled beside you, a woman talked to you. Her mouth moved, a red liquid dripping from her face and hands. Her touch was warm. She felt like home. Shadowheart. Her eyes reflected a golden light, but they dissapeared so quickly.

"Let me go!" She tried to fight Lae'zel's hold, but the warrior was stronger. "She'll die because of you. She'll die and I will never ever forgive you for that, you damned gith!" The screams turned into cries. "She saved me, let me save her!"

"It's me," the doppelgander said. She held Shadowheart by the cheeks, trying to get her to calm down. "Lua, love, it's me. Just me."

"Get out of me," Shadowheart spat on her face. Lae'zel pushed her away, trying to prevent Shadowheart from doing something she would regret. "Why no one here listen to me?!"

"Stop squirming," Lae'zel hissed. "Look into her eyes. Look and tell me you don't see our leader."

Shadowheart eventually stopped fighting, her body exausted from crying. The changeling was in front of her, you were in front of her. She smelled like you. Talked like you. Felt like you.

"Is that really you?"

"Of course it's me," lied Orin. "Please, look into my eyes. We were together all day. You know I haven't left camp. Please, please, trust me."

Spikes grew, surrounding Orin. She hissed, the ivy twining around her legs and tearing the skin open. Halsin were throw to the ground before he could end the healing spell.

"Halsin!" Shadowheart screamed. She almost escaped Lae'zel's hold. "No!"

"She was with us all day, Halsin," Wyll said as he paralised the druid. "We know it's her. Don't fight back."

That didn't stop Karlach from throwing her spear near the Blade's feet. "You fucking idiot!"

Mizora clapped, enjoying the show.

Jaheira burned Mizora before losing her wild shape. She will come back, she always does, but that never stops Jaheira. At least they will have some moments of respect.

She wandered towards Minsc. He kneeled on the floor, and for a moment she feared something happened to him when she wasn't paying attention.

"She told me not open my eyes," cried Yenna. "I can't open they yet. She told me not to."

"Have you ever seen my miniature giant space hamster?" Yenna didn't react to him. "No, Boo, she nee..."

Jaheira kneeled beside him, her hand resting on his shoulder. "You did well, cub," she forced herself to laugh. "You were so brave. Let's get you and your red cat something to eat, alright?"

A dry sound reached their ears, stopping every and each one of them. You fell to the ground, as firm as an empty sack, whimpers leaving your mouth as you slipped into unconsciousness.

No fighting. No yelling. A quiet end. A peaceful one.

So easy.

Astarion grabbed Gale's shoulders, whispering so the others wouldn't notice. "It smells like her," Astarion swallowed hard. "I know it."

"Are you really sure of that?" Gale watched you, saw all your blood spreading through the ground, and looked into his eyes again. "Because if you're not, if your guess is wrong, then it will be our guts on the ground. Do you really trust your nose that much?"

Astarion gave him a smirk, but Gale could see the fear he was trying to hide. "Will you cover me, darling?"

"What's your plan?"

"Please. If you think I have one, then you don't know me at all."

As the spike dissapeared, Orin held Shadowheart's face again. "Think of everything we faced together. The nautiloid, the grove, the shadows. Wasn't I beside you all this time? Have I ever turned my back on you?"

"No." That Shadowheart knew the answer. "Never."

She looked up to the moon, praying for assistance. When her eyes fell down, she saw the body on the floor. And what surrounded it.

Scratch sad down beside you. He nudged your shoulder with his nose, waiting for you to stop with that game. He didn't like it. It wasn't fun like the others. But as he moved your body, she saw something reflecting the sunset. A flask. Concentrating, Shadowheart saw the contour of something. Of Astarion's body.

Gale had blue rays of light coming out of his eyes.

"Exactly, my love," her cheeks were pinched. The long nails digged on them for so long. "I've never turned on you. Not when you tried to kill Lae'zel. Not when you lied to me again and again. Or when you showed us how low you would go for your goddess. Remember the fear on the Nightsong's eyes? Remember how I pretended not to know all you would do to her if I wasn't there? A cleric who doesn't know where to lay her faith, a torturer so easily deceived, a coward unable to make the right decisions. That's why you never turned on me, right? Because I make the decisions you can't. I carry all the guilty for you. Because it's easier when I control everything. Don't you like it? That you don't need to use your brain when I am around? Wouldn't you give your memories to me if I asked? I know you would. I know you will."

Your head fell. The bone cracking, the skin stretching. They could hear as it moved, as it turned into something else. The shoulders falling, elbows breaking in half, the spine bending until it touches the bloody ground. The last snap, deep and long.

And from a thin cloud of dust, Orin appeared.

"Look at it. Crawnling under my fe..."

Nyrulna wasn't near Wyll, deep on the ground, neither did it came back to Karlach's hands. With accurate aim, the trident pierced Orin's ribs. Her blood joined yours, and the pale body fell where yours once lay.

Taking your time, you walked towards her. Stepping on the changeling's stomach, you ripped the trident from her insides. "I will give you a glorious death," you growled. "I'll make Bhaal wish I was his chosen."

You kneeled beside her, pressing the trident against her neck, then lowered your face until her ear. "I'll make him regret ever settling for you," you whispered.

Her eyes shone. "How... you know," she could barely say anything. "My... sib..."

You squeezed her cheeks, shutting her up. Then you caressed it, getting her skin dirty with your blood. "I know shit about you," you replied. "But I can tell you would never be anyone's first choice."

Orin can believe she escaped, if it's that what she desires. That you were too slow to stop her from teleport to wherever she deemed safe. That you were all bark and no bite. The truth is that she was wrong about you from the start.

You like the hunting.

You dropped Nyrulna to the ground, and threw yourself into Shadowheart's arms. “She lies,” you whispered. "She deceives and hurts and maims. Nothing was true. You're nothing that she said."

Quietly, Shadowheart hugged you. She breathed in your scent, felt your touch, heard your voice. You, you, you. She cried against your body. You.

Looking at the rest of your party, you breathed in. "We need a code," you said. "If we ever get into this sort of situation again, we need to say..."

You bite your lips, trying to think of something. Something you wouldn't use in another situation. Something that would be unique, impossible to confuse the meaning.

"Gold," you chose. "Or the rest of us are allowed to go for the kill."

Lae'zel cleared her throat. "Fair enough."

if you enjoyed, please reblog! i promise it makes a difference ♡

BALDUR’S GATE 3 TAGLIST: @citrusbunnies

@ madwomansapologist.tumblr.

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crystalsenergy · 2 years

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recurring themes in our lives - Pluto and Chiron placements

Persephone and Hades

when I think of recurring issues in our lives, I think of placements of Chiron and Pluto by the very nature and effects they both have on us.

Chiron is the wound that takes time to heal and which, more than that, is the wound that hurts but that the native can't even understand and be aware of. Chiron relates to feelings that bad cycles will repeat.

Pluto represents our greatest fears, where we may want to control things (exactly because of the fears) and also where we project ourselves. Pluto hints at the area in which we need to undergo a profound transformation in order to be more evolved and even to stop certain suffering in our lives.

therefore, I decided to bring a post about the recurring themes that Chiron and Pluto touch for those who want to go through this process of consciousness.

Chiron in the 1st house: wound related to own identity, not being able to perceive who you are. feeling incapable of initiating things and being the protagonist of the search for their identity.

Pluto in the 1st house: fear of imposing yourself or fear of being dominated, which can manifest in a few different ways, but the center of it is the intensity and at the same time the lack of control involving your self-image.

Chiron in the 2nd house: wound related to the feeling of comfort, security, the right to relax, to enjoy the pleasures of life. not feel stable and able to acquire security in life situations. living with the feeling of inner insecurity.

Pluto in 2nd house: fear of existing without your material possessions, fear of not having security, interruptions in life regarding comfort and stability, fear of things involving the 2nd house, which can lead to destructive behavior.

Chiron in the 3rd house: wound in relation to communication, free expression, the mind can be quite guided by the idea of incapacity, the feeling that others don't really listen to you, not feel ready for socializations.

Pluto in the 3rd house: fear of everything that involves expressions of what is on your mind. need to guard your thoughts because deep down you may feel that you are not so capable of expressing yourself, that you are not so intelligent.

Chiron in the 4th house: wound about family, feeling that the world or the place you are currently in is not a home for you. the lack of an emotional home, which hurts inside.

Pluto in the 4th house: fear of having your weaknesses and emotional issues exposed, fear of not having a comfortable family and home, which can lead to controlling behaviors.

Chiron in the 5th house: wound related to self-expression and ego. feeling that you are not good, you are not capable and that you will not be seen by others. wound related to the value that people (don't) give you.

Pluto in the 5th house: fear of not being appreciated; fear of no one knowing you. fear of not being loved, not receiving doses of love here and there. fear about the value of the things you do. fear of not being accepted by people.

Chiron in the 6th house: wound in regards to your sense of usefulness to others. wound that can even manifest on physical levels. feeling that you are here to give too much but receive too little. mental time and routine are problems that bring you soul-related wounds.

Pluto in the 6th house: fear of not being useful. fear of not having control of things on earthly levels, feeling that when one thing is out of your control, everything is out of your control. fear of being criticized.

Chiron in the 7th house: wounded with love and the idea of love, either by concrete experiences or by things that the native thinks. that is, there are ideas and fears that were never confirmed - but that native fears that they will one day. wound related to partnerships in general, the idea that people aren't deep enough for a relationship, the "failures" in relationships that cut deep into that individual's soul. wounded in relation to what every individual wants most: to be loved.

Pluto in the 7th house: fear of being alone. fear of not being good enough for others. fear of betrayal. feeling that you are not a good boyfriend or a good girlfriend, a good husband or a good wife. feeling that there will always be someone better. fear of partnerships, but a deep desire to relate.

Chiron in the 8th house: wound in relation to trust. hurt related to manipulation. native sees someone being manipulated a lot. wounded in relation to opening up, the idea of surrender on all levels haunts the individual, paralyzes him/her and makes him/her do several observations before allowing someone into his/her life. despite the difficulty in opening up - even on sexual levels, the apex of human intimacy -, the native can have difficulty discerning what is and what is not manipulation, and at the same time can not know how to close doors at the right times, closing him/herself wrong way.

Pluto in the 8th house: fear of being controlled. fear of being exposed to others. fear of having your privacy in front of others. feeling that all things are deeper than you see, fear of trusting others. fear of surrendering and opening the doors of your vulnerability.

Chiron in the 9th house: wounded about not being intelligent enough and capable of understanding profound things. feeling that things will never work out. a negative preconception of life. beliefs and philosophies of life can be seen in a fatalistic and/or pre-deterministic way. feeling of being lost and without a spiritual guide in this life.

Pluto in the 9th house: fear of not belonging to the world on spiritual levels. fear of expressing the deepest knowledge you have, whether for fear of criticism or exposure. fear of delving into dense knowledge all at once. denial of this, which can lead to the exact opposite of what the native wants to avoid, she/he can become obsessed with some point of a belief or the like because of his fear of not belonging spiritually.

Chiron in the 10th house: wound in relation to reputation, prestige and social recognition. the individual may feel that he/she was "born to be a failure" and that he/she can't get out of a situation to go to a better one. the negative view the natives hav of themselves may be intrinsically linked to how they think society views them or what they believe society expects of them. moreover, at the deepest level there may be a feeling that the goals pursued by people on a social level - career, material goods - are not capable of bringing satisfaction to the native. the native may also have difficulty finding him/herself on social levels - such as in the sense of career and vocation for life.

Pluto in the 10th house: fear of others seeing your inner weaknesses. fear of being publicly exposed. fear of not reaching your goals. fear of being a person out of control of things (or out of control of people). fear of not reaching a pleasant and stable social level. fear of lack of stability.

Chiron in the 11th house: wound in relation to social groups. not feel good enough to join groups. wounded in relation to groups that deny or do not perceive its presence. problems with friendships. feeling that you can't trust others. friendships that are important to you but that hurt too much.

Pluto in the 11th house: fear of not being in any group. problems involving identifications and ideologies. fear of getting involved in group activities. fear of being controlled by others. intense desire to do everything alone, denying their social needs, and at the same time fearing being alone. disharmony in relation to group integration.

Chiron in the 12th house: wound related to being quite deep but not being able to express it. wounded over deeper emotional and psychological issues that can't be expressed for some reason - fears, insecurities and desires are denied by you or by others around you. feeling that there is always something wrong around you, but not being able to deal with it. inner spirituality and life that bring some kind of discomfort to you.

Pluto in the 12th house: fear of knowing your depth. fear of your emotions and insecurities controlling you. fear of getting lost in the world and having nothing to lean on. feeling that your emotional life is so intense that few will understand, so you need to hide your inner life from everyone. fear of letting people get to know you for real. fear of what is deep and unconscious and at the same time a great attraction to it.

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viv-hollande · 5 months

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Ok, so this is a post that I should have made sooner. I've been somewhat out of the loop with regards to current events and the state of discourse on this website courtesy of a pretty serious depressive episode from which I am only just now recovering. As I have emerged from this state I have been pushed towards a conclusion about this website and the state of discussion around the ongoing Israel-Gaza War that I had thus far avoided due in part to my barely possessing the energy to keep myself alive and due in part to my denial that the conclusion could be true. But that denial can no longer hold.

It has become openly apparent that the pro-Palestinian camp on this website has become popularly infused with a degree of blatant, aggressive antisemitism that I, in my naivety thought impossible in the days just after October 7. I am trying to avoid turning this into a mea culpa because that would be unproductive and feel self-serving, but I do feel an obligation to admit that I disregarded prescient warnings from Jewish users whose warnings I dismissed as over-blowing a problem that I felt was real, but more limited in scope than they made out.

I'm neither an idiot nor am I ignorant. I am well aware of the long history of antisemitism in leftist politics and in the Palestinian Liberation movement. Back at the beginning of this crisis I was prepared to see the occasional instance of antisemites using the inevitable, overwhelming Israeli retaliation as an excuse to air their hateful politics. I was prepared to see both the well-meaning but ignorant and the malicious alike sharing tweets from antisemitic pro-Palestine accounts, spreading and normalizing low-grade, subtle antisemitism. Make no mistake, this should have been condemned. Antisemitism, like all bigotries, has no 'safe' level. There is no background level of antisemitism that society should just accept as normal. But I was more focused on the inevitable cacophony of suffering that Israel would almost certainly begin meting out, and so I failed to act.

The fatal blow to my denial was the increasing prevalence of the use of quotation marks around the word "Israel" and "Israeli". The first few times I saw this, I didn't really understand what it meant. Still laboring under the belief that antisemitism was a manageable problem on the left, I was certain that most of the users on this site, well-intentioned, goodhearted, critically thinking people that they were, would have recognized and called out even disguised antisemitism before it took over a good 20-40% of all posts about the conflict. I was a damn naive fool. For those, like past me, who have not cottoned on to the meaning of the quotation marks, they have become a way to express the denial of the legitimacy or even existence of, individually or all together, the State of Israel, the Israeli people, or the right of either Jews or Israelis to identify as Israelis.

CONGRATULATIONS TUMBLR! You have successfully revived from depths of 4chan neo-Nazi boards the (((fucking echoes))).

Are you serious? Are you fuckers for real? This, right here, encapsulates the pitch-black absurdity of this whole situation and why I remained in denial for so long. Never, in a million years, would I imagine that the proudly pro-Social Justice, anti-fascist, 100% Certified SAFE-SPACE(tm) website would end up using the same language as the goddamn Nazis on 4chan. I thought this website was smarter than that. But noooo, it turns out that I was a damn naive fool.

This was where the post was originally going to end. I say my piece, hope to change a few minds, and commit myself to actually fighting antisemitism instead of sitting back and dismissing the problem. But I figure, while I'm here and while I still have the driving forces of anger and guilt pushing me along, I may as well put pen to paper and spew forth my other thoughts on the ongoing crisis. I am thus compiling a much longer post detailing my thoughts on some aspects of the current situation. [EDITED ~1:25 AM GMT, 5 Dec 2023: add link to finished post] That post will definitely be long, probably be angry, possibly wrong on some aspect of fact, and will absolutely be pretentious, preachy, self-righteous and hubristic to a positively Hellenistic degree. Brief, non-comprehensive summary so you can decide whether or not get mad at me ahead of time;

Israel does apartheid, or near enough for government work.

Israel is definitely conducting a campaign of forced displacement, possibly amounting to ethnic cleansing, but I remain unconvinced of the claim of genocide.

Hamas may or may not be a anti-colonialist revolutionary group, but it definitely is an antisemitic terrorist organization with genocidal aspirations and actively supporting them is morally indefensible. Yes, this includes the Al-Qassam Brigades.

Anti-colonial and other revolutionary movements do in fact have fundamental moral obligations and suffering oppression does not give you carte blanche to do terrorism, even when an oppressor attempts to render peaceful opposition impossible. There is a middle ground between peaceful marching and 850+ dead civilians; aim for that.

The left is just as prone to unhinged conspiracism as the right.

Verify your sources, for fuck's sake.

Use nuance. It won't kill you.

There's more, but it's a little difficult to summarize an unfinished post. If you want to argue with any of these points, go ahead, just keep in mind that a longer, more comprehensive post is in the works that might have the answer to your argument/complaint/insult/intellectual disagreement. If that post isn't up by midnight GMT on Friday, assume I forgot about it and argue away. In conclusion, antisemitism is bad, apartheid is also bad, Tumblr is a hellsite (derogatory), "From the river to the sea" is, in fact, antisemitic, seriously, stop saying it, take Jews seriously when they warn you about antisemitism instead of writing them off like a damn naive fool, and last but not least, free Palestine.

#antisemitism #israel gaza war #israel #palestine #fuck hamas #politics #leftism #free palestine #israel palestine conflict #misinformation #here goes nothing #kicking the hornet's nest

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iamnmbr3 · 2 months

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Draco's Motivations in the Book 7 Room of Requirement Confrontation

I just reread the Fiendfyre sequence and based on a close reading Draco's motivations and actions are a lot more complex and sympathetic than I remembered. Not to mention, once again, here there be drarry.

First, the context:

After the incident at Malfoy Manor, we know from Harry's psychic connection to Voldemort and from the Carrows' overheard discussion that Voldemort's wrath was exceptionally terrible. The Malfoy family became virtual prisoners in their own homes for months and were subjected to especially brutal (even by Voldemort's standards) torture that was also likely quite protracted. Lucius has visible marks on him months later - which, given what we know about magic in that world, really speaks to the level of what has been going on. While he probably got the worst of it, it's certain that none of his family members escaped unscathed. After their other failings they have at this point probably permanently fallen out of favor and have nothing but a (likely short) life of misery to look forward to.

Draco bears a lot of responsibility for this state of affairs since it was he who chose not to identify Harry. This likely adds to his sense of conflict as his conscience tells him one thing and everything he has ever been taught tells him something else. He presumably feels responsible for the suffering his family (we know from book 6 that he does genuinely care about them) has to endure.

Not to mention that he himself is suffering along with them. It would be unsurprising therefore if he felt tempted to "rectify" his earlier moment of what he probably perceived as weakness and made a last ditch attempt to save his parents' (and his own) lives and prestige. While Harry has been taught that love and mercy are noble and valuable impulses, Draco has not. In his world love and mercy are called weakness.

Quite possibly as he suffered and faced death alongside his family, part of him must have felt ashamed of the impulses that led to his choices when Harry was a prisoner at the Manor. Everything he has been taught tells him that Voldemort's victory is inevitable and that his moment of shameful weakness has accomplished nothing except to fail his own family and condemn them (and himself) to a likely short life filled with suffering.

At most what we see in the Room of Requirement is a replay of what we saw on the Astronomy Tower - where Draco is deeply conflicted and when confronted with the reality of violence in support of Voldemort cannot go through with it even under tremendous pressure and even though his failure to carry out these acts of violence will inflict danger and suffering on himself and his loved ones.

But, is that even what actually happens? In my opinion, the answer is "no."

The scene in question:

If we actually look at the text it's not even clear that's what's going on at all. Draco's motives are ambiguous at best here. The scene starts when Harry is stretching out his hand to take the diadem. Draco, Crabbe, and Goyle come up behind him and he is completely unaware of them. Draco then announces their presence, alerting Harry that he is being watched. He could've very easy simply stunned Harry or attempted to put the Imperius Curse on him (or killed him) while his back was turned. But he didn't do any of those things. Instead he talks, thereby ruining the element of surprise.

And that's not typical of Draco at all when he actually wants to attack Harry. He's never beaten Harry in a face-to-face confrontation. (In fact, the last time he tried - in 6th year - he almost ended up dead.) The two times he has managed to incapacitate Harry - when he petrified him on the train in 6th year and when he hid and caught Harry for Umbridge with a tripping jinx in 5th year - he did so by using the element of surprise to his advantage.

Given that Draco knows that Harry is a very formidable opponent (AND that Harry's friends are nearby) if he truly simply wanted to capture or kill him, announcing his presence is the last thing he would ever do. Then he says "That's my wand you're holding." He still doesn't cast any spells - not even to try to disarm Harry. He also doesn't say he wants to hand him over to Voldemort. He doesn't even tell Harry to drop his own wand, attempt to take him prisoner, or even threaten him.

It is Crabbe, not Draco who says "We're gonna be rewarded...We decided to bring you to 'im." Draco doesn't say anything about his own intentions other than that he wants his wand back - and we certainly know that even in 6th year he didn't trust Crabbe and Goyle, much less now, and thus is unlikely to speak openly in front of them.

At this point Ron comes to investigate and Crabbe tries to use magic to cause a mountain of debris to fall on Ron and crush him. Harry counters the spell and Draco then grabs Crabbe's arm when he tries to repeat the spell. He gives as his justification the need to avoid the diadem being crushed but since we know he doesn't trust Crabbe it's likely this isn't truthful. Especially since Voldemort has not said anything about wanting the diadem (and even if it wasn't a Horcrux it likely wouldn't be damaged in any case).

Crabbe points out this very thing and Draco argues with him at which point Crabbe says "Who cares what you think? I don't take your orders no more, Draco. You an' your dad are finished." So arguably he was not even including Draco in the "We" he imagined would be rewarded. Crabbe then tries to use Crucio on Harry.

Draco then again intervenes and tries to stop him.

"STOP" Malfoy shouted at Crabbe, his voice echoing through the enormous room. "The Dark Lord wants him alive--"

He doesn't even just say it. He shouts. We rarely see Draco shout. He is someone who generally keeps his deeper emotions hidden - it's why he's so naturally gifted at Occlumency to the point that he is powerful enough at a young age to lie to both Snape and Voldemort.

What he says here doesn't really even make sense because Goyle isn't even trying to kill Harry; he's just trying to hurt him. However Draco is so distressed by this that he actually starts yelling, something we NEVER see him do at ANY other point in the book. "The Dark Lord wants him alive" is also exactly what Snape says to Bellatrix as they flee in book 6, and we know that Snape's real intent was to protect Harry with a believable excuse. It's the only thing Draco could reasonably say in that moment as a justification.

Crabbe (rather sensibly) points out that 1) he didn't even try to kill Harry and 2) Voldemort ultimately wants Harry dead so it probably doesn't matter that much. This makes perfect sense. And yet Draco is inordinately concerned with preventing harm to Harry & Co rather than with taking any action to capture or even disarm any of them.

Clearly he did not expect to lose control of Crabbe and Goyle like this and as a result is now losing control of the situation (and himself). (Unlike Harry, Draco is more of a planner and is not as good at reacting in the moment.) Also the possibility that Harry could be killed seems to drive him nearly to the point of hysteria - rather like how Ron reacted to Hermione being in mortal peril at the Manor. This is not just a general aversion to killing. This is something more. He finds the idea of Harry dying truly unbearable. (I don't need my ships to be canon; this one just happens to be.)

At this point they start fighting and Draco loses Narcissa's wand. Wandless, he STILL tries to intervene. Crabbe and Goyle are both aiming their wands at Harry and Draco once again starts yelling - "Don't kill him! DON'T KILL HIM!" and is obviously in significant distress and is not at all happy with what is going on.

After that the Fiendfyre gets loose and the rest of the scene goes down without much dialogue.

At NO POINT does Draco 1) actually say he wants to hand Harry to Voldemort OR 2) attempt to attack Harry or Ron or Hermione at all OR 3) use his Dark Mark to call Voldemort OR 4) tell anyone he's seen Harry after they get out of the Room of Requirement - even in a later scene when he's been cornered by a Death Eater who is considering killing him he doesn't reveal this information even though that probably would've proven his loyalty or at the very least distracted the Death Eater.

Conclusions about Draco's motivations:

So, where does that leave us? What went down there and what was Draco trying to do?

We really have 3 options.

Option 1: Draco tried to hand Harry over to Voldemort in order to save himself and his family, got cold feet and couldn't really go through with it, and then lost control of the situation due to Crabbe and Goyle's changing loyalties.

Verdict: Possible but unlikely given the remarkably bad job he does of it and how inconsistent his approach is with his usual MO. Even if we assume his heart wasn't in it you'd think he'd at least have got as far as disarming Harry before announcing his presence. Especially since Harry almost killed him last time they fought (and Draco probably doesn't know Harry didn't know what the Sectum Sempra curse would do.)

And if his heart WAS in it then then this makes even less sense since he not only didn't attack Harry while his back was turned but also didn't call Voldemort or even inform anyone that he'd seen Harry.

Option 2: Draco wanted to get himself captured in a way that looked convincing so that he could take the chance Dumbledore offered in 6th year, only it went quite badly wrong.

Verdict: This would be an interesting possibility but I think it's also unlikely as it's simply too risky. He doesn't know Harry was there on the astronomy tower or that Harry would make the same offer. His family would also likely be murdered if Voldemort realized this had happened.

Option 3: Draco wanted to cut a deal in order to improve his family's situation without actually handing Harry over - perhaps he hoped for some kind of exchange where he could get his wand back and bring Voldemort the diadem as some kind of consolation prize - but overestimated his control over his cronies and lost control of the situation.

Verdict: I actually think this works best given his behavior during the scene. He initiates a conversation because he wants information about what and where the diadem is (and what value it would have to Voldemort) and because he wants to make some offer along the lines of 'give me my wand and the diadem and we'll let you go.' This could get him what he wants and help his family without actually harming anyone.

Also it hedges his bets a bit because if Harry wins he will owe Draco. The problem of course is that Crabbe and Goyle aren't happy to just take orders anymore and have their own goals. At that point, instead of caving and going along with what Crabbe and Goyle want to do instead, Draco actually tries to intervene, albeit in a way that doesn't actually expose him as questioning Voldemort.

Draco made his choice at the Manor. If he wanted to hand Harry over he would have. But he couldn't. He cares about him too much. But he also feels tremendous guilt and fear over the price he and his family are still paying for that decision. This is his attempt to try to fix things - to try to find a middle ground between the conflicting imperatives that are tearing him apart. The reality though, as he shortly discovers, is that there is no middle ground. And when he sees that, once again he chooses Harry.

#hp reread #meta #my meta #Harry Potter meta #Draco Malfoy meta #drarry meta #Harry Potter #harry potter and the deathly hallows #hpdm #h/d #harry x draco #draco x harry #harry/draco #draco/harry #harco #drarry in canon #Draco Malfoy #drarry #my post

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artbyblastweave · 5 months

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An interesting thing about the Monarch is that while obviously the entire gag is that he’s enmeshed in this postmodern weirdly formalized etiquette-and-code-of-conduct-based form of super-villainy, this notably does not translate to him being a Megamind-style functionally-benign-showman kind of villain-in-name-only. He kills innocent people constantly. There’s a running gag where he kills cabbies to get out of paying fare. This doesn't really seem to be a salient factor in the other character's assessment of him as a threat or moral agent-his ability, or lack thereof, to tow the Guild line and keep pace with the inside baseball is what actually makes waves, draws scrutiny. There's the comedy of that Season 1 episode where they basically call a time-out mid-death trap in compliance with Guild Law, but this doesn't translate to anyone outside the game receiving similar protections or considerations. He lets Dr. Venture leave midway through an arch to see his shrink and then murders the shrink so that those interruptions will stop happening.

And to me this feels like it’s gesturing at a very real thing that can happen in cape comics, where even the nominally harmless bit-villains aren't actually harmless even if they fail to kill the hero specifically, where even the really overtly silly ones have in fact likely whacked at least a few unnamed characters over the course of their 60-year publication history- only for this to sort of get sanded away as a morally salient feature of the character unless they become specifically known as One Of The Ones Who Constantly Kills People (Joker, Bullseye, Carnage, etc.) because security guards and people trapped in collapsing buildings aren't really real. The show is also attentive to the analogous thing that happens with superheroes with the weird moral myopias they suffer from, in the way that basically every hero has some insane instance of superdickery rattling around in their closet that's still technically canon but hardly relevant. The show is very very clear that as long as you correctly couch your behavior within the idiom, color within the lines, you're entitled to a certain level of carnage and collateral. Which is demonstrated in the second episode with the Revenge Society, where Phantom Limb and company are genuinely freaked out when a nameless slasher shows up to the try-outs. Phantom Limb constantly brutally kills people, but this guy in a bear costume with a kitchen knife? He's killing them in an off-genre way.

#the venture bros #venture brothers #I was partway through season 5 when I wrote this #seasons six and seven reinforced it #the venture brothers #thoughts #meta #the monarch

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