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aroaceleovaldez · 4 days

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in your most recent tyson post, you said something about leo being distinctly autistic-coded and I was wondering if you could elaborate on that? it sounds really interesting (sorry if you've already posted something on this, I couldn't find anything though)

Of course! I do have a specific tag for talking about Leo's autistic-coding/traits - [here], and [one for Nico as well].

The main aspects with Leo being autistic-coded actually have a lot to do with Nico being autistic-coded, because it's the comparisons between the two that most clearly indicate Leo is autistic-coded rather than it just being his ADHD or etc.

So with Nico being autistic-coded, it's very clear in the Titan's Curse that he's intended to be autistic. First, the first series has a repeating pattern of secondary characters being very distinctly neurodivergent-coded in different ways (Annabeth's adhd/dyslexia, Tyson's down syndrome-coding, Nico's autism-coding). With Nico's introduction, he's pretty stereotypically autistic and we're given a lot of descriptors about him that are notably not attributed to him being ADHD, like it would be for other demigod characters. He doesn't register social cues such as people getting annoyed at him, he's asking/making inappropriate or impolite questions/comments, he gets particularly upset about change (such as Bianca joining the Hunt) and generally gets emotional, and one of his most notable traits he's introduced with is the fact that he has a special interest (MythoMagic) - and we're shown that this special interest particularly colors how Nico navigates the world. While ADHD has hyperfixations, we don't really get much acknowledgement of hyperfixations with demigods usually - Annabeth gets a little, but most others don't and it's not nearly as focused-in on as Nico's is.

Then as the series continues we see these traits stick with him and him start to show or voice more traits that similarly indicate he's autistic: He regularly mentions how he doesn't understand living people and prefers the company of the dead (social issues). He has more notable stims than other demigods (twisting his ring, fiddling with bones, etc). He's indicated to have strong sensory preferences (usually wearing mostly black/aversion to bright colors, usually wearing layers/his coat, multiple times he's described as wearing loose/baggy clothing or clothes too big for him). He has specific comfort items (his ring, likely his jacket(s) as well). We later get even more information about his special interests (Mythomagic/mythology/history and an older interest in pirates - the latter he specifically notes likely heavily influenced his feelings towards Percy). He struggles with emotions and facial expressions and tone. He struggles particularly with ostracism and feeling like he doesn't fit in and has something distinctly different about him from the people around him (who notably, all have ADHD, which indicates it isn't the ADHD that's making him feel that way), and other characters regularly describe him as being off-putting because of his strange behaviors - again, different from specific ADHD traits they recognize. And that last point is kind of notable because we have Hazel and Bianca for comparison - we know people are off-put by both Nico and Hazel because of being children of Hades/Pluto and their powers/aura, but other characters get past that general feeling of discomfort way faster with Hazel. And even after characters get past the death stuff with Nico, there's a second thing that they aren't moving past that isn't a factor with Hazel (Nico's autism).

So that brings us to Leo - Leo is paralleled to Nico a lot. And there's some very specific traits about him that we know are autistic-coding because of how they're used with Nico: He similarly struggles with social cues/etc, and in a very similar parallel to Nico describes how he prefers the company of machines to people because machines make more sense to him. He has similar types of clothing/sensory preferences (again some stuff with layers but also - pockets! He likes having pockets and things to put stuff in! He's even introduced as having a jacket with lots of pockets), and he has a distinct special interest (machinery) that we specifically know heavily influences how he views and navigates the world (constantly comparing things to machinery, describing things with machinery metaphors/terminology, etc etc). He even describes his entire general worldview to Hazel and it's a machine metaphor. He also similarly struggles with ostracization like Nico does, the only difference being that Leo specifically puts on a persona to compensate for areas he knows he's lacking in and very explicitly describes it as a means to make people like him, because without it he normally struggles to fit in (He's masking!). We also see notes of characters describing that similar discomfort with Leo's behaviors that they do with Nico, except without the aura of death this time. And when we're in Leo's POVs we see a very stark difference between his masking and his actual personality/behaviors such as his internal dialogues or how he behaves when he's alone. Also, like Nico, he stims more than other demigods, though for Leo it's more attributed to his ADHD. Leo also, more often than most, similarly struggles with tone and reading the room, such as making misplaced jokes/comments or etc.

But yeah! It's really interesting. Also it's just a fun thing that ADHD/dyslexia and autism have comorbidity, so it makes sense that we see demigods who are also autistic. It's also really fun to look at how other characters are coded in the series, what coding looks like in the riordanverse specifically (usually it's tied into the mythological stuff - like Chiron being in a wheelchair but he's actually a centaur, Grover being introduced as having a muscular disease but he's actually a satyr, demigods having adhd/dyslexia, Tyson being coded as having down syndrome but he's a cyclops, etc etc - it's a lot of specific metaphor stuff that I've talked about a bit before), and to look at how characters are compared to one another.

#pjo #riordanverse #leo valdez #nico di angelo #autistic nico #autistic leo #autism #analysis #Anonymous #ask #long post //#woof sorry that got long #im very passionate about this topic #re: characters being paralleled #Ms. ''Constantly Neutral - No Emotions'' Reyna looking at Nico stimming in the exact same way she does (twisting ring)#and internally going ''We have a lot in common. I don't know how I feel about that.'' is one of my favorites.#like. reyna. ma'am. you might be autistic. good luck with that.#with the pattern of coding in the first series i do suspect Rachel has some coding as well but i haven't been able to pinpoint what it is #I think it may be the whole seer thing and the fact that she could see the future #even before becoming the oracle/despite being a mortal rather than a demigod (who just get rare prophetic dreams normally)#and in BoTL her entire thing is that she's able to see things that no one else can and that's how they navigate the maze #particularly also with how the labyrinth is treated/how it affects people within it (see: Chris)#and how the only other seer in the first series - May - is characterized and her coding compared to Rachel's #also something something the seer traits become more prominent once Rachel meets Percy #something something metaphor about only being able to recognize neurodivergency traits once you're familiar with them #so Rachel meets Percy = introduction to the community > Rachel recognizes her own traits/symptoms > gets a support system (oracle)

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libraryofgage · 3 months

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The Prince and the Metalhead (2)

Part of: Steve Deserves Good Parents, Actually

I know I just posted part one but I've got Thoughts for this AU that include: Steve's first birthday in Genovia and then his 16th, his conversation with his grandmother about attending public school in America for his senior year, and then we get into him attending Hawkins High and meeting Eddie!

So, yeah, plans lmao

Anyway, if you see any typos, no you didn't ;)

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"You'll have a rotating course schedule. Mondays and Wednesdays will focus on math and social studies. Tuesdays and Thursdays will be science and literature. Friday will be Royalty lessons and the history of Genovia. We can also include an elective, if you'd like."

Steve blinks, staring at Sue for a moment before glancing at Jonathan and Robin. Jonathan is looking through a book of photography and Robin is idly scratching behind Dart’s ears. "Will we all have the same elective?" Steve asks.

"Not unless Jonathan and Robin want to join you," Sue says, looking at Steve expectantly. She's got a pen at the ready to write down what he says, and it suddenly feels like a lot of pressure.

Is there a wrong answer here? Is there an answer that gets him sent back to his parents? He looks down, biting the inside of his cheek so hard he tastes blood. Before he can lose himself in his thoughts, a cold and wet nose presses against his hand. Steve blinks, smiling at Dart and picking her up to hold close. "What kind of electives are there?" he asks.

Sue hums softly, flipping to another page on her clipboard. "Possible electives include art, music, theatrical performance, physical education, equestrian studies, botany, and foreign languages, to name a few."

"I'll be taking photography lessons," Jonathan says, looking up at Steve and gesturing to his book.

Robin nods and leans back on her palms. "I'll be doing the physical stuff. Like learning how to fight and practicing ballet to improve my balance," she says, leveling a look at Steve that dares him to say anything about the ballet.

Steve wouldn't, though. He doesn't want to make Robin angry enough to ditch him. He looks down at Dart, thinking for a moment before asking, "Can I take more than one?"

"Of course, but you're limited to three for now," Sue says.

What would be the most helpful? Foreign languages, probably, since he'll definitely have to speak with ambassadors from other countries at some point. He should also learn something that can be shown off, a skill that he could pull out at functions to make his grandmother proud or distract guests.

"What language should I learn?" he asks.

Sue thinks for a moment, tapping her pen against her chin. "Mandarin. It's a business language, and we have close relations with a few representatives from China and Hong Kong. If you'd like to learn a Romantic language first, though, Spanish is good."

"I'll learn Mandarin," Steve decides, nodding once to himself. "And music. I want to learn to play...hmm...the piano."

With a nod, Sue writes his electives down. "Let me know if you'd like to add an elective later, Your Highness. In my opinion, though, your current courses will keep you properly challenged for now."

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Sue wasn't kidding about his academics being challenging. Steve struggles in math, muddles his way through science, drags himself through literature, and is ready to drop when he hits social studies. He'd ask the tutors to spend more time on topics, but Robin and Jonathan seem to have no problem keeping up, and Steve can't bring himself to disrupt their pace.

His Mandarin lessons are going just slightly better if only because the tutor seems to recognize that slower is better for him. After almost a month, he's starting to understand intonation and vocal variation better, and he can recognize a few characters on sight.

Piano lessons are also going well. His tutor there doesn't burden him with theory; she introduces the keys, shows him how to read sheet music, and then lets him choose songs to learn. Steve feels the most at ease when he's squinting at sheet music and slowly pressing piano keys into something recognizable.

The lessons he really looks forward to, however, are the ones for his Royalty Education. He gets to see his grandmother then, and she spends the whole day with him. Even better, something about this stuff just clicks. He's good at fixing his posture and memorizing silverware placement. He bows just right on his first try and his grandmother compliments his wave.

By the end of the lesson, she'll be smiling, her pride obvious, and take him for a walk in the gardens or to eat cookies in the kitchen.

"Royalty requires maintenance," Clarisse says, standing in front of Steve with relaxed shoulders. "You maintain your demeanor, your image, your knowledge of foreign dignitaries, your understanding of the people’s needs, and your humility. But you must also maintain your pride and your boundaries."

"That sounds like a lot," Steve says, idly tugging at the hem of his shirt.

"It can be overwhelming, but it becomes second nature in time," Clarisse explains, smiling reassuringly. "When you're royalty, you are constantly watched. Many eyes are kind or curious, but others are malicious, and you want to do everything you can to disappoint the malicious ones."

"How?"

"By acting like the Crown Prince you are."

"What kind of prince am I?" Steve asks, finally voicing the question that's been lingering since these lessons started. What kind of prince does his grandmother want? What kind of prince would best serve the people? What kind of prince will be so loved by all that nobody could even think of thinking about getting rid of him?

Clarisse hums, thinking for a moment. "I suppose a good one," she says, her slight smile telling Steve that she's only lightly teasing. "My hope is that you'll be kind and competent. You will make Genovia prosperous without compromising tradition. You won't allow politics to stand in the way of doing what's right by the people of Genovia. But this is a tiring job, so I hope you'll learn how to balance your duties with relaxation."

It's a lot, but Steve can do it. He can be that kind of prince, especially for the country and grandmother that's offered everything he's ever wanted and more. He nods once. "Okay," he says, "What do I need to learn, then?"

Clarisse smiles fondly at him. "Let's start by reviewing Genovian history. Only by knowing the past can you face the future."

With that, she places a book on Steve's desk and doesn't wait for him to open it before telling him about Genovia's founding.

------------------------

Steve has weekends off from classes, which leaves him with more free time than he knows what to do with when he doesn't have to clean a house or make his own meals. So, he's bored, and telling Robin that he was bored was a huge mistake after she suggested riding bikes around the garden only to learn Steve didn't know how.

She'd insisted that he should learn, insisted that Clarisse be the one who teaches him, and insisted on hearing no objections.

And now he's here, standing in front of Clarisse's desk and staring down at his feet as she finishes writing something on the paper in front of her. Joe is standing just to her right, hands behind his back.

"Okay," Clarisse says, gently placing her pen on the desk before looking at Steve with an encouraging smile. "What did you want to ask me, Steve?"

Steve bites the inside of his cheek, takes a deep breath, and looks up. "Well, um, Robin wants to ride bikes, but I don't know how," he says.

"Well, that's easily fixed," Clarisse says, reaching for a phone at the corner of her desk. "I'm sure a member of staff is free to teach you."

Before she can pick up the phone, Steve finds himself blurting out, "Well, I...I was hoping...you could teach me."

Clarisse freezes, blinking twice with confusion before looking at Steve. "You want me to teach you?" she asks. When Steve nods once, she sighs softly. "A queen does not ride bikes. Besides, I have too much work to complete. Perhaps I could accompany you for a walk this evening to make up for it."

Despite himself, despite bracing for rejection, it still hurts. In the three months he's been in Genovia, Clarisse has agreed to just about every request he's made. Every held breath as he waits for cruel words has been released with unprecedented relief when none came. Even when he broke something---a priceless vase, according to Jonathan---his grandmother had simply surveyed the damage, thanked him for being honest, and asked him to avoid kicking soccer balls in the presence of priceless vases in the future.

Perhaps Steve has gotten too comfortable. He shouldn't be pushing like this. If he wants his grandmother's affection, he should know when to hold himself back.

So, despite the unfamiliar urge to ask again in case Clarisse might change her mind, Steve nods once. "I look forward to walking with you, Grandmother," he says, his voice quiet. He glances up, waiting long enough to see Clarisse's smile before turning on his heel and leaving the office as quickly as he can.

Clarisse watches him go, her head slightly tilted as the door closes silently behind Steve. She nods once, glad that Steve is sensible enough to understand things like work and propriety, and picks up her pen once more.

"If I may speak freely, Your Majesty?" Joe asks.

"At this point, Joe, you may as well assume the answer is yes."

"With all due respect, Your Majesty, and please pardon my French, my experience has been that assuming makes an ass out of you and me."

It takes a moment for Clarisse to understand the joke. When she does, she can't help her amused smile. "Fair enough," she says, "Go ahead, Joe."

"Do you remember what I said about being Steve's grandmother?"

"Yes, of course."

"Perhaps now is one of those moments where being a grandmother is more important than being a queen. His Highness does not ask for much, and he is not the kind to ask more than once, even if he really wants something. I imagine it took a significant amount of courage to ask you to teach him in the first place."

"Are you suggesting that I...I risk making a fool of myself for all to see?" Clarisse asks.

"I am suggesting you spend time with your grandson, who asks very little of you because he does not believe he can ask for anything."

Clarisse is silent a moment, letting Joe's words process and settle in her brain. Finally, she sighs and gestures to the papers on her desk. "I have work to complete," she says.

"Your Majesty, editing these proposals was on your schedule two weeks from now. You are ahead of your work. A break would not be unreasonable or unwarranted."

Well, when he puts it like that.

Clarisse sighs, leans back in her chair, and looks up at Joe. He's still staring at the door, giving no indication that he feels her eyes on him, but she knows he does. "Have a groundskeeper retrieve bikes and safety gear and meet us in the garden," she says, standing from her chair and bracing herself to look like an utter fool.

Her apprehension fades away fifteen minutes later. It can't hold last when she sees Steve's surprised and delighted expression at her presence. As she helps him put on knee and elbow pads, shows him how to pull the helmet's strap tight, and holds the bike steady as he sits on it, Clarisse decides a little foolishness is perfectly fine (necessary, even) if it will keep the smile on Steve's face.

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Tag List (let me know if you'd like to be added to future parts!)

@y4r3luv, @potato-of-the-lord,

#stranger things fic #steve harrington fic #princess diaries crossover #queen clarisse renaldi #modern royalty au #future steddie #robin buckley #jonathan byers #the party's parents #my writing #anybody else ever have that experience where the first time you realize that somebody won't make you feel guilty for asking for things #you get way in your head about not asking for the one (1) thing that will ruin it all for you #so every time you ask for something new you're bracing to take the request back as quickly as you can #just me?#aight then lmao #to absolutely nobody's surprise i am projecting on steve harrington #if you made it this far in the tags #you deserve a cookie lmao

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hypogryffin · 9 months

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i cant believe i wasn't following u b4,,,,,ive just been silently scrolling through your blog for like a solid YEAR and just haven't even noticed????? n e ways what are tha thoughts on literally anyone in p4 being trans bc i live for that 🎤

the way my brain decided that this was asking for pronoun headcanons and did not reread to make sure that was what you were asking before drawing all of this…... well anyways

#asks & requests #p4 #trans naoto #<- trans everyone lmaooooo #sort of waffling on chie-- he could also be trans or enby easily #ive always thought he would be a 'my gender is lesbian' type person tho LMAO #if hes trans then she and yukiko are as close as they are because trans friends lmao if chie is afab then i think that would come up #accepting his shadow- part of him not feeling 'feminine' enough is that yukiko is more of a woman than her in societys eyes and well.#its not a violent outing bc no one who heard her shadow is like that but chie apologises to yukiko for that #yukiko transitioned pretty early so no one in town (school age at least) really knows #rise is afab its just that she Despises the idea of being a man #kanji is cis but hes cis+ after exploring; does do the occasional drag but is a gay man who happens to use she/her #yosukes whole vibe is 'probably nonbinary but i have a job so i cant worry about that rn'. also i think maybe bigenderism in his future #he/him only for the foreseeable future tho. baby steps #narukami is defo stealth mode for at least the beginning of the game but probably around teddie or naotos shadow she comes out #and i like kuma so ze is like me and uses it/its. :).#ok those are all my notes. sorry for not directly responding to what you asked but i do think what i said is a good answer to your wuestion.#for claritys sake i also live for it.

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i-wanna-die-like-now · 1 year

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Ghost King Danny AU where he meets the past OFA holders in the ghost zone and gets to know them personally, they're the ones that ask him to go to the future to help with some long awaited fight, to ensure that another person didn't die by AFOs hands. Clockwork reluctantly agrees and that's why he is there.

#i see the ghost zone as a place without time just full of past and future ghosts #i want to juse see danny fumbling because he knows all mights secret and he knows all about afo but cant explain how #would be fun to make them see him as the traitor because he knows so much and is secretive about hos quirk and life #aizawa shouta #is just done with his shit and then they bring in #naomasa tsukauchi #his quirk not understanding most of dannys answers #is your name danny fenton? why is that only half true? what is your quirk? thats a complete lie but its on line with what hes shown of it #could throw in #danny not being able to age so when they ask his age its a lie #danny phantom #danny phantom fandom #danny fenton #bnha #my hero academia #dp x bnha

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thresholdbb · 3 months

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Do we think Seven can feel all of her face and body?

The Borg know when things happen in the collective and can arguably feel them, but when an individual is severed from the Borg, that expansive collective consciousness is violently narrowed down to a pinpoint. We know Seven has pretty good proprioception because she agrees that her shoulder hurts when the EMH finds that her biradial clamp is off by 0.3 microns. Because of this, she arguably has a very good understanding of how things in her body feel. That said, she doesn't really complain about physical pains, and we really only see her struggle when things are emotionally difficult.

Since she had been in the collective since she was 6, she wouldn't necessarily know that certain sensations are not normal. If there were any issues that happened as a result of her assimilation, she wouldn't necessarily know they are unusual after she was severed because that's what she has always known.

So back to my original question: can she feel all of her face? Looking at the placement of her facial implants, they are both on the trigeminal nerve. The cheekbone implant is right around the root of the nerve, and the eyebrow piece sits right over another branch. Trigeminal neuralgia is crazy painful, but she could have trigeminal neuropathy and think it's completely normal because she doesn't have a typical baseline to compare it to. I imagine the Borg implants must interrupt some nerve functioning to ensure that the drones move as they are supposed to, and the nano probes would repair any damage that would affect their functioning. But the Borg would consider physical discomfort irrelevant, so relatively minor issues like neuralgia, pins and needles, or any other unusual sensations would not be considered an issue.

#bodily autonomy in a collective existence #strange territory to be sure #but like how much do the Borg fuck with nerves #I would bet she has trigeminal neuropathy just because of the placement of her implants #like maybe the emh would find the issues but Borg tech is still new to Starfleet medicine and he would be in largely uncharted territory #I have more thoughts but they are still nebulous #I don't fully remember where her arm implant is placed but it's not on the exposed elbow nerve #I spend a lot of time thinking about fictional future medicine don't mind me #and the trigeminal nerves are sensitive little sunflowers #have you ever had a conduction test on your Trigeminal nerve? ask your emh today #meta #not like polished meta just a burst of wtf about the Borg #start actually writing my thoughts down again #not even going on main tags with my crack analysis idk #clearly I miss boyager #melts into oblivion

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immunetoneurotoxin · 3 months

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“Not a soul assigned to their case at the Bureau could make sense of their existence. There wasn’t a single scientist, parapsychologist, doctor, or specialist with over a dozen PHD’s under the sun that could figure them out. Pyrokinesis in a human? They defy every law of nature, yet they exist amongst humanity regardless. How do you explain that?” “The truth is that there are a lot of unknown things out there in the world that mankind hasn't even begun to scratch the surface of. Everyone flocked to this case trying to find rational answers, but there aren’t any. Look at the files in your hands. By the eyes of science, Pyro should not exist. Don’t you know what happens to things mankind doesn’t understand? The Bureau has done sickening things to them in the name of research.” “That’s why I helped them escape, Conagher.”

Excerpt from the novel INCENDIARY; A TF2 Pyro origin story Read the latest chapter of 'Incendiary' on AO3 here! Artwork created by the incredible @narklos ♡

#tf2 #tf2 pyro #if you're reading this hello!! I'm the author of this story!#I was basically struck with an idea one day... what if I created a whole pyro origin story with deep world building and original characters #7 years later here I am :)#the pyro origin story nobody asked for but is getting anyways!#while it is on track to be a origin-type novel it is also still very much a self-indulgent fanfic #I still have a long ways to go before this fic is done but this is by far one of the most ambitious projects Ive ever done for any fandom #and I hope you all love it too <3 #also CAN I JUST SAY #NARKLOS IS A GOD #I gave him a vision and he just blew my fucking mind away with the final product that I'm still in awe about this #Narklos if you're reading this ILY and I can't wait to work with you again <3 #also I should mention that the excerpt IS in the story but in a future chapter that isn’t out yet #but it was fitting for this post :)

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another-clive-blog · 4 months

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Why are we as a fandom not talking more about this scene ??

Clive is literally asking the professor to come back and stop him. Like this isn't him pretending to be Future Luke : he looks genuinely upset/displeased even after the professor promises to come back. He only goes back to smiling after the professor says, and I quote "I wouldn't dream of leaving things here in that state" before talking about stopping his future self. Clive wants confirmation that Layton is actually going to confront the bad guys, that he won't just solve the mystery but fix it too.

And this is literally so important. Clive's speech at the end, about getting saved. This is concrete proof that he had truly meant it from the start, because he's asking for Layton to stop him and thus save everyone here. Which, hey- he didn't just hope and wait to get saved, he tried to save himself too.

Yep, that's right. The game talks about how dangerous it was for Clive to bring Layton underground : it doesn't talk about how even more dangerous it was to let him leave. He could have brought back cops (he did). He could have gathered precious knowledge out there (he did). He could have never come back (and yet he did !!). Clive letting Layton leave is the biggest threat to his plan, and yet HE DID. And you know what else he did ? Make Layton promise to stop him. You can't make a clearer call for help, you just can't.

"Oh but it doesn't make his crimes more forgivable, now does it-" of course not. This isn't about Clive's redemption, it's about Clive trying to avoid needing a redemption : his efforts are vain the moment he started using the fortress. But. There were efforts.

#Damn Syl ! Back at it again with the nonsense/stating the obvious !! <3 #Actually nope I don't care. I know how it feels when your self is working to achieve a goal your essence is actively against.#You just feel TERRIBLE. Shouldn't I give in ? I want to give in. It feels wrong but fighting it feels even worse. I'm tired #This exchange is so important. The despair. Asking for help when he knows at that point he's not getting saved it's too late #Like he's been working on the mecha he knows it's done he knows he's starting it. He knows Layton will be his enemy #And yet he still asks him to fix things. He still lets him go when Layton would have understood if it wasn't possible #It's about Clive asking/trusting Layton to keep the fight going and win even when Clive himself knows he can't keep fighting #I feel like I'm repeating myself. It's 2am and I'm sleepy ahah but I needed to get this one out <3 #clive dove #professor layton and the unwound future #professor layton and the lost future #unwound future spoilers #lost future spoilers #My analysis #(Scheduling this one to post when I'm sleeping. I wonder how this one will go lol)

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floralfractals · 5 months

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Hi everyone, I wanted to write a quick update to you guys :)

I made this blog in March of 2021. At the time, I followed my first math course on fractals and dynamics, and had just discovered a tool to make my own awesome fractals. This blog started out as a place to share the art I was making as a coping mechanism during covid, but as I quit making them after a few months, this blog died pretty quickly. In 2022, I decided to start posting regularly again (mostly just shitposts though), just so that the effort I put into this blog wouldn't go to waste.

Then, in the beginning of this year, I started writing my thesis. I posted one (1) shitpost about him (my well-known and popular son), and got 10s of thousands of notes. Every morning I would wake up to another crowd of people who loved the graphs, or were baffled by them, and I got showered in asks to elaborate on him.

Truth be told, 2023 has been a very heavy year for me. A lot of things happened in my personal life, and I lost a dear friend to suicide. It became so difficult for me to keep writing on my thesis, and the project that should have been finished in June this year has now been taking 4 months too many. My mental health has suffered greatly, I haven't been able to take any breaks, and life has just been generally difficult. I have spent nights not being able to sleep because I wanted to finish my bachelor's thesis so bad, but my supervisors would keep demanding more work, more edits, and more drafts. At some point, I even considered quitting my studies and finding a job.

The community has helped me to keep going. Mathematicians and non-mathematicians alike who sent me genuinely interested questions, made me laugh in the notes, created fanart (??? I'm still baffled by this but the people who did this are the coolest in the world) and generally made me feel for the first time that mathematics isn't a universally hated subject. On some days, the only reason I was able to keep going and the only thing keeping me from experiencing burn-out was the support I got through this blog.

Today, 10/12/2023, I turned in my thesis. Thank you so much for your support!

#my sickly son #math #literally thank you guys so much #this isnt a goodbye or anything its just me being sentimental lmao #ill be able to start posting about other things in the future #probably less things about my sickly son and more idk fun stuff about dynamics/fractals/probability #maybe ill get into fractal art again now that i have the time #right now past me is drafting this after one of the lowest days ive experienced in a few months #just as a reminder that i will be able to post this at some point and i will be done and i will be able to call myself BSc #disclaimer the supervisors did ask for more work but it was also bc my thesis just Was Not That Good for a long while #had to fix a looooooooot of mistakes #no shade on them i love my supervisors a lot

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bambiraptorx · 2 months

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For the ask game! Raph and with either Starved or Punishment

Oooo this is gonna be fun.

content warning: disordered eating

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Raphael 'Ragnarok' Hamato learns many things when he gets tossed back in time, and one of them is that he'd apparently underestimated just how scarce food had gotten during the decade or so that he'd been living in a world dominated by the Krang.

Sure, he'd known there were limits to what he could have--snapping turtles have a nasty habit of growing throughout their lives, after all, and feeding someone who's just going to keep getting bigger and bigger puts a strain on anyone's resources. He's gotten used to a reduced food intake over the years, everyone has.

But he just doesn't quite realize how reduced it really was until being thrown into the past, bruised and battered and more exhausted than he'd ever been before, and somehow ending up in the care of none other than Baron Draxum.

And it's not like he minds the Baron attempting to nurse him back to health--he needs to recuperate somewhere, anyway, and watching Draxum trying to hide his research when Raph already knows full well what's going on is kinda funny--but it involves way more food than it should. Three meals a day, plus snacks in between? It's ridiculous.

At least, that's what he thinks at first.

The weeks pass as he waits for a sign from his brothers, his injuries healing. There's more than he'd thought at first; at least there's more things Draxum considers to be 'injuries' than Raph does. A few cracks in his shell, some thin places where the scutes never fully grew back after taking damage, scars and old wounds galore, not to mention all the actual damage. So what if those are all healing slowly? Not like Raph has anything else to do right now but heal, rest, and pretend to eat all the food he's given.

And it's not like it's even that hard to hide what he doesn't eat. Some of it he squirrels away here and there, just in case. Some of it he pawns off to the gargoyles: all it takes is telling them he doesn't like the texture or the taste, though if he isn't careful with how much he gives them they'll bring him more. Most of it he sneaks back into the kitchen, hiding it away in the back of the fridge or taking the time to stash it in a container.

A few times he's had to take a protein shake (or the weird yokai equivalent of it, anyway) to the bathroom, and pour it down the toilet, cringing internally at the waste of food, but it's fine, really, it's not like he would have eaten it. Some days he hides or stashes or replaces more than he eats, but it's not like he wasn't managing just fine before. He's not even that hungry nowadays.

And maybe it's just all the time he has now, but he seems more tired than he ever was before. Colder, too. Draxum must not have heat in his house or something, that seems like something a mammal who lives with two employees made of rock would forget about.

Not like it matters too much right now, when he's getting himself a glass of water in the middle of the night. Also putting his bowl of rice from earlier back in the fridge. Why did the gargoyles bring him that, anyway? He'd already had his three meals for the day, he doesn't need extra food.

It's just after he puts the bowl away (well, puts the rice away in a different container, he's not leaving an entire untouched bowl in the fridge to be found later) that the kitchen lights flick on. Raph blinks a few times at the sudden brightness as he automatically shifts into a wider stance and lets ninpo bubble up his arms--oh, it's just Draxum. He looks pissed, is he not sleeping well again? Couldn't be Raph, he knows for a fact he's been too quiet to wake someone up.

Draxum glares at him with a ferocity he hasn't witnessed since coming to the past, and even before that hasn't been directed at Raph in years. "I don't understand why you keep doing this."

Raph sets his empty bowl in the sink, gently so it doesn't crack. "...doing what?"

"Don't play innocent, you're getting rid of your food again." Draxum jabs an accusatory finger in his direction. "You've been doing this for weeks and it cannot continue."

"Noooot really sure what you're talking about here." Raph reaches for the cabinet where the glasses are kept. Maybe Draxum's just in one of his moods again. He's a lot crankier in the past, that's for sure.

"You nearly passed out earlier today!" Draxum yells, and okay, Raph does not care for that at midnight.

"Pretty sure that was just exhaustion catching up with me. 'Sides, I don't need that much food anyway." He sets the cup under the faucet and turns the water on.

Draxum's mouth falls open. "You don't--you need more food than what I've been given you for the last few weeks, any simple calculation of your caloric needs could show you that. That's what the food between meals is supposed to be for! Not hiding away! And you'll only need more as your recovery continues and your metabolism jumpstarts again--" he pauses as Raph tilts his head.

"You sure?" It's a genuine question, but it makes Draxum ball his hands into fists so tight they tremble.

"Ragnarok--do you realize the condition you were in when I found you? The injuries that wouldn't heal, the lack of appetite, the constant cold you complain about--those are signs of starvation. You were on the edge of mass organ failure when I found you, and with your continual avoidance of food--" Draxum presses a fist against his temple. "And you're telling me you didn't even know?!"

The water is still running, overflowing the side of the cup. Raph slowly reaches out his hand and turns it off. He blinks, first with his outer eyelids, then the inner membrane.

"No, I didn't."

There are a lot of things that he'd learned before coming to the past, but the signs of starvation weren't among them. That would explain a lot more that he's actually comfortable with it explaining.

---

I don't want this to get too much longer so I won't write the resolution, but I couldn't not tie this into my I'm Not Dead Yet AU.

ask game

#asks #bambi's rambling #rottmnt #rottmnt au #i'm not dead yet au #imndy au #rottmnt raph #future raph #raphael hamato #rottmnt baron draxum #rottmnt fanfiction #my writing #rise of the tmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #dont be fooled by this snippet of the au draxum is literally just as bad about food as raph #it's just in a different direction

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lulu2992 · 6 months

Text

So Greg Bryk regularly goes live on Instagram to chat with his followers and answer a few questions, and almost every time, someone asks if he’d like to play Joseph Seed again if he had the chance, to which he used to always reply that, yes, he absolutely would. However, in early 2022, he didn’t seem so sure anymore and said it would depend on the script (the question was specifically about a potential Far Cry 5 movie) and the writer(s). Then, a few months later, he implied he didn’t feel like playing the Father ever again because he thought the character’s story was “finished” and that Ubisoft should focus on creating new things instead…

Well, on October 14, 2023, he once again went live on Instagram and, when people mentioned Far Cry 5 in the chat, he revealed that he had reached out to Dan Hay and Drew Holmes, two of the game’s three main writers he’s become friends with, and that they had visited him “on set” (I’m not sure what he was shooting) the day before. In the past, he had already explained several times that he had loved working with them and thought the story they wrote (along with “JS”, Jean-Sébastien Décant, the game’s third main writer) was fantastic. This time, he added that Far Cry 5 was really “special” to him because the writers “cared a lot” about creating something great with amazing characters, and that he thought the whole Seed family was really well-written.

A few minutes later, when he was asked which character he would like to play again if he could, he said it was hard for him to choose because he loves them all, but he eventually picked Jeremy Danvers (Bitten) and Cobbs Pond (Frontier).

Then, surprisingly, he also mentioned Joseph.

I don’t know why he changed his mind again or if the fact he contacted Dan Hay (who doesn’t work for Ubisoft anymore) and Drew Holmes (who recently became the new IP Director for Far Cry) means anything, and I’m not sure I want more Far Cry 5 content to be released anyway (for continuity reasons), but I guess the Seed family’s return, as equally exciting and truly terrifying as this eventuality sounds to me, isn’t completely out of the question anymore in Greg Bryk’s mind!

#someone also asked if the book of joseph was canon but as expected he had no idea #actors rarely know that stuff and I’m not even sure he got to read it...#but yeah the boys’ awful childhood is definitely canon the writers have talked about it several times #far cry 5 #joseph seed #greg bryk #okay but... listen #I wondered if I was just imagining things when he first mentioned collapse during a live stream and I thought he looked a bit upset #the dlc wasn’t out yet but I was pessimistic so I concluded my fear probably was the reason he seemed unenthusiastic/disappointed to me #then when he said he didn’t feel like playing joseph anymore I once again wondered if it was because of collapse (which was now out)#but I told myself I was most likely influenced by my own negative opinion and he simply wanted to focus on new projects #but... now he’s happily talking about the original writers and how much they 'cared' about making something good #and he seems really enthusiatic again about possibly reprising the role in the future #so is he implying that he thought the other writers (the dlc’s)... didn’t 'care'?#does he also think there were problems with the seeds’ characterization in collapse??#is it possible that I wasn’t just projecting after all???#????#...okay maybe I’m still projecting #but the timing is a bit suspicious isn’t it?

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