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zuluc · 4 years

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@ukiiyo requested: so ive become a major diluc simp and i was wondering, could i get a scenario of diluc getting jealous that his s/o hangs out more with kaeya than with him? just need me some wholesome diluc fluff🥺👉👈

pairing: diluc ragnvindr x gn!reader

style & genre: written; fluff

warnings: diluc’s jealous haha, kind of suggestive at the end :p

notes: i too have fallen down the hole of simping for diluc and i regret nothing,,, anyways i like this scenario because it got me thinking of how exactly he would react (ft. kaeya noticing and fanning the flames of jealousy [aHA get it]) and i’m hERE for it; i hope you like it!

The first time it happens, Diluc is mildly annoyed from having his time with you shortened.

He’s already staring holes into Kaeya the moment he steps into the tavern. His brother, or rather adopted brother, has a cheeky grin on his face when he pulls out the stool next to you, abruptly interrupting your conversation with Diluc. You weren’t talking about anything in particular, just a casual conversation that Kaeya did not hesitate to bring you out of.

“Say, y/n,” he leans in closer to you with his chin resting in his palm, “would you like to accompany me to Springvale?”He looks at you expectantly before quickly darting his gaze to Diluc and back to you. The tavern owner raises a brow.

“What business do you have there, anyways? And with them, no less.” He places the glass he was cleaning on the counter and glares straight ahead.

“Don’t worry over it,” Kaeya says simply, “come now, y/n, before it gets too dark.” He stands up and makes his way out the door, his hand waving in behind him. You give Diluc an apologetic look and look at the side at the people in the tavern. They’ve been drinking away all night and should be a little too disoriented to know what is going on.

But it wasn’t like they weren’t aware about what was going on between you two.

You lean forward to place a kiss on his cheek and pull back, “I’ll see you later.” You hop off the stool and follow Kaeya. Diluc clicks his tongue in annoyance, Charles coming up behind him just in time to see your figure leave out the door.

“Oh,” the older man says, “I thought they’d be staying longer.”

“Hm,” Diluc only returns to cleaning the glass, unaware of the knowing look Charles is giving him.

The second time is when he’s walking around Mondstadt. And he is aware but does not accept it for the sake of his pride.

Diluc expected to see you as you also had business with the knights, something he was a bit skeptical about, but what he didn’t expect is for you to be hanging around the cryo holder again.

Your face is bright and you’re laughing at something the male says as you both walk to Good Hunter. You don’t notice someone staring at you, but Kaeya does. Being the ever-so cunning, Kaeya smirks at the redhead and ushers you to take a seat at the table. Diluc cannot visibly hide his annoyance this time and there’s a pang in his chest.

Oh, no. Not because of him of all people...

You didn’t visit him again after the night at the tavern and it had been a few days since, only greeting him when you pass by in the streets when all he wants to do is wrap you in his arms. And now the annoying one is hogging all your attention?

He is about to approach the both of you until Kaeya his hands on your shoulders, making you face him. Diluc steps back and scoffs.

He had plans for the day anyways. The Abyss Mages weren’t going to kill themselves off, right? He internally rolls his eyes at the thought and turns around to pass by the general store and out the side entrance.

“Are you sure it’s going to work? It’s nice right? He’ll like it?” You’re bombarding the knight with numerous questions and he can’t but sigh. Kaeya places his hands on your shoulders to stop you from rambling on again. It was cute that you were so worried over doing something for Diluc after all.

It was simple: it’s his birthday soon and you wanted to plan something special. You wanted to cook for him and travelling around the towns (Xiangling had left for Liyue a few days ago and you had no time to get there, ask for assistance, and get back). Neither Lisa nor Amber had much interaction with Diluc and Jean kept everything to a professional level. The only one that you could have thought of to help out was Kaeya since they were “close” to say the least.

Luckily, he was more than happy to assist.

“Yes, yes, and yes. I’ll tell you now, he’ll appreciate it, especially if it comes from you,” he looks to the side to see that Diluc is gone.

“Is something wrong?” you ask, also turning your attention to the area Kaeya is looking towards.

“No, nothing. Let’s finalize what you have, shall we?”

The third and final time is when he’d had it. There’s no denying that there’s something else going on.

You’ve been actively avoiding him now, making up excuses of helping clear out slimes near the bridge or things like that. Diluc only nods in response when you rush past him, but can see out the window that you’re meeting up with Kaeya.

Needless to say, he is in a bad mood.

There are numerous tasks for him to finish at the winery and even if he wanted to see you he couldn’t since he wasn’t in town. The only thing he’s hanging onto are the words you say to him before he leaves.

“Come to my home later, there’s something I want to show you!” You sounded excited and so proud of yourself that he couldn’t refuse.

Well, he couldn’t refuse anything you asked of him anyways.

The day felt long and his patience was wearing thin. The last paper on his desk is finally placed neatly atop the pile he worked through for countless hours. Diluc sighs before cleaning up to arrive quickly into town to be able to see you faster. You always make his days better and the sight of your face relaxes the tension he holds in his shoulders.

He makes it to Mondstadt in record time and your house is close, all the while he can hear some of the townspeople greet him. But apparently he’s only aware of the “Good evenings” or “hellos” not the “Happy day of your birth!”

You come into his view, then he sees Kaeya next to you.

At this point all self-control has gone out the window and he makes no eye contact with the other male before pulling you by the wrist and into your house. You are shocked, especially when Kaeya winks from behind Diluc before the door closes.

“Diluc--”

“What have you been doing with him?” His voice sends chills down your back as his gaze holds yours steadily. You try to look at the walls, or anywhere, instead of his eyes but he holds your chin to make you look at him. He has you backed up against the wall, his other hand still holding onto your wrist.

Diluc is suddenly aware of a certain aroma in your house and he eyes you suspiciously, turning his head to look behind him. There on your dining table was an immaculate dinner. You took many hours to make the food and make it look pretty all for this moment.

“Uh...happy birthday?” You supply sheepishly when he diverts his attention back to you. He holds yet another staring contest before resting his face in your neck.

“I figured you were getting too close to him...” he mumbles, letting go of you wrist to wrap both of his arms around you. You reciprocate the action, still confused at his sudden change in tone.

“I just wanted to make you something nice,” you say in a quiet voice. He pulls back, a soft smile on his face as he kisses your forehead.

“Thank you,” but he’s still a little peeved, “but why him?”

Then you put the pieces together, a smile on your face forming. He never outright said anything about this, never being the person to share his feelings so quickly, and you wanted to see how he would respond. “Were you perhaps, jealous?”

He doesn’t say anything and you think you took it too far, but he elicits a gasp from you when he lifts you by holding your thighs, pressing you against the wall. Well, it was a while since he was with you.

“Yes,” he whispers into your ear,

“...very.”

His grip on you is strong and you look longingly at your hard work.

The food ended up becoming cold.

#genshin impact #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact headcannons #genshin impact scenarios #genshin impact imagines #genshin impact fluff #genshin impact angst #diluc ragnvindr x reader #diluc x reader #diluc ragnvindr #diluc

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krappykawa · 4 years

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Hi !!! can I request oikawa, osamu, hinata (+ whoever you feel like adding) reacting to their female s/o calling them "hubby" (they have never used that nickname before since it's supposed to refer to a husband) to see their reaction??? i just saw this as a tiktok prank and they were like "omg you wanna marry me??? im definitely gonna marry you" and now im sobbing so precious 🥺🥺🥺

reacting to s/o calling them hubby

characters. oikawa x f!reader, osamu x f!reader, hinata x f!reader

note. in every scenario, reader is internet famous & posts little previews of their life on tik tok!

note 2. sorry for not posting in a while,, school started again and i’ve been mentally drained but i will try and finish other requests soon!

OIKAWA.

- you guys are filming a snack review video because oikawa lost all self control while grocery shopping and literally was picking things off the shelf left and right

- he insists that he’ll finish them this time but you know that’s a lie

- but you also decide that it’s also the perfect time to try out this tik tok prank on him so he won’t be suspicious of the camera

- the camera is set up and everything so now all you have to do is say it

- “hey guys today we’re going to do a snack review because my husband bought wayyy too many snacks” cute rolling eyes and cute little smile directed at oikawa that makes your watchers go 🥺🥺

- IT TAKES HIM SO LONG TO REALIZE

- like you’re literally staring at him waiting for him to realize but he doesn’t

- you’re halfway through opening your first bag when he finally realizes

- “WAIT”

- you look to the camera to make sure you’re filming this whole thing

- “you said husband.”

- “i did?”

- “YEAH! you did. i heard you say it.”

- “no i didn’t!”

- “check the video y/n-chan. i heard you say it.”

- he makes you replay the video because he will whine and pout until he makes sure that you hear it

- practically lights up when he hears it again

- “hmm does that mean you wanna marry me yn-chan?”

- “no it doesn’t”

- he notices the small blush on your cheeks points all over your face. “ooo you wanna marry me so bad huh?”

- the living incarnation of the 😏 emoji

- big cocky smile on his face bc he takes it as an accomplishment that you called him your husband on accident

- his eyes are secretly all teary-eyed though because HUSBAND?,$3;!9 💓💓💓💓💖💞💘💞💘

- he decides right there and then that he’s gonna propose soon because he thinks his heart physically bursts at the idea of you calling him husband for real

- the only reason he doesn’t propose right there is because 1. he doesn’t have a ring and 2. his an extra little bitch that wants to keep you on your toes while also making sure that his proposal is so good that you’ll end up crying happy tears

- when you post the video on tik tok oikawa makes sure to like every single comment that says “THEY’RE SUCH A CUTE COUPLE UGH WHY DONT THEY JUST GET MARRIED ALREADY”

OSAMU.

- his ass loves food so he literally lights up at the idea of doing a mukbang

- at first he insists that you don’t film it because he’s lowkey creeped out about the idea of eating in front of a camera just for people to listen to him eat

- he finally agrees to filming it when you promise to make the mukbang have all his favorite foods

- what he doesn’t know is that you’re simultaneously trying a tik tok prank on him

- “hey guys! welcome back to my channel! today we have a special guest, my husband, osamu because we’re doing a mukbang and you will always find this guy with food in his mouth, no joke.”

- he catches your little slip-up right away

- “husand huh? ya got something ya wanna say?”

- doesn’t even care that there’s a camera in front of you (he thinks you’ll just edit it out anyway)

- you play innocent because where’s the fun in telling him it’s for a tik tok right away?? “hmm what are you on about miya?”

- “what i’m on about is that yer telling me that you want to be a miya.”

- WEE WOO WEE WOO OSAMU EYEBROW RAISE WEE WOOO WEE WOO

- “i guess i do like the ring on miya y/n”

- “is this a proposal then?”

- cue shit-eating grin from you. “nah, the man in question isn’t here. you don’t happen to know atsumu’s ring size do you?”

- osamu’s little impish grin drops so quick and now he’s playfully glaring at you

- “ya say shit like that again and i’ll make ‘sumu switch places with me on the altar when we get married.”

- you're laughing into your knee at that point until you make a realization

- “wait. you said when we get married. not if.”

- “i didn’t stutter did i miya?”

- tik tok comments blow up with squealing fans bc OHMYGSOJD

HINATA.

- you’re a proud gf so you’re more than happy when someone asks you to live stream with your volleyball famous bf

- you also thought it might be a good time to pull this prank on him that you saw on tik tok and get his reaction on live camera because it’s bound to be funny since he’s hinata

- after one of his games you run up to him and hug him before telling him that your followers wanted to live stream with him

- “oh ive seen those!! i’d love to say hi to your fans!! do they know i play volleyball??”

- “yes, babe that’s the whole reason they wanted to meet you.”

- “REALLY???”

- you laugh at how cute he is and then turn on the live

- “hey guys, the long wait is over! here i am with my husband, world famous hinata shoyo! he just finished a game and-”

- “HUSBAND?” he interrupts you and he looks kind of giddy at the prospect. “does this mean you want to marry me y/n??” blushy happy hinata because you bet your ass he’s thought about it before but just didn’t know how to go about talking to you about the idea of marriage

- “what happens if i say yes?” you’ve thought about it too, so you playfully entertain his excitement.

- “then let’s get married!”

- you have to do a double take because you didn’t think he was actually serious. “wait really?”

- “you want to right? that’s what you said!”

- “of course i do! i just didn’t think you would propose right here right now.”

- “why not? i love you, you love me. you want to get married, i want to get married. so let’s get married!”

- the comments are blowing up because oh my god you just managed to accidentally capture your future husband’s proposal on an instagram live

- bokuto and atsumu overheard the whole thing and tackled the two of you into a group hug

- let’s just say your live ended on a frame of bokuto’s face close up because he’s so happy that “the student is getting married!!!”

- atsumu pulls out of the hug for a second and being the little shit he is, runs to the locker room and comes back with a ring pop

- “can’t propose without a ring shoyo! where are yer manners??”

- hinata actually gets down on one knee and proposes with the ring pop and you’re so red because at this point the entire stadium is watching

- you say yes anyway

#oikawa tooru x reader #oikawa x reader #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu #haikyuu x reader #hinata x reader #osamu x reader #osamu headcanons #oikawa headcanons #hinata x y/n #osamu miya #osamu miya x reader #hinata shoyo x reader

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lueurjun · 3 years

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𝖱𝖮𝖠𝖣 𝖳𝖮 𝖥𝖠𝖬𝖤. 𝗌𝗂𝗆 𝗃𝖺𝖾𝗒𝗎𝗇

“=⌕ sim jaeyun x gn!reader.

⌗ SUMMARY — becoming a tiktoker was never apart of the plan, but here you are, 4 million followers and a love for pranking your boyfriend.

. . ⇢ LUEURJUN’S NOTES — this is supposed to be gender neutral but if i slipped up at any point then i do sincerely apologise. this probably won’t be written the best, i was kinda sick and had a moment of inspiration. this is super fluffy and cheesy, so brace yourself.

₊❏❜ WARNING ⋮ uh tears of joy?? i guess.

2021 @lueurjun.

THE 30TH APRIL 2020 was the day that your life changed in ways that you used to believe only happened in movies.

Honestly, setting up your phone and telling your devilishly handsome, yet so pure, so innocent boyfriend that you wanted to have a child—whether that be adoption plans or getting pregnant—it was a small prank you decided to pull and film for your group chat. You never had any intentions of uploading it onto the internet, until Jay, one of your closest friends, suggested that you posted it to Tiktok.

Jake was cool with it, having not expected it to blow up as much as it did. Nobody had expected for you to get over 2 million views and over 600k likes on your first video. Nor did you expect the heaps of requests in your comment section of different pranks to pull on your boyfriend. And that’s where it began.

That one video was a rabbit hole into what quickly became your career.

Now, with over 4 million followers, you have created your own little fan base, who have grown to love you, your boyfriend and even your friends that occasionally end up in your videos.

ii.

The light in the kitchen flickered once as you set up your phone against a bunch of cookbooks that your parents had yet to read. Mentally, you made a note to ask one of your family members to change the bulb when they returned home. Focusing on your phone, which was now recording, you put your thumbs up and turned towards the door.

“JAEYUN!” Your voice echoed through the quiet home, bouncing off every wall until it met your boyfriend’s ears. Brief shuffling could be heard followed by the padding of feet across the floor boards. He was only in the next room, so it didn’t take long for him to appear right before your eyes.

The first thing your eyes set on was the crinkles in his shirt, suggesting that he had been laying down. His dark hair was hidden beneath a black hat, which he had placed on his head backwards. He was dressed so simple, but you still managed to fall in love once again at the sight of him. You often wondered how you had managed to bag someone like Jake, he was the epitome of perfection and you couldn’t really see why he would want to be with you. Jake never let these thoughts ponder in your mind for too long, since he was always quick to prove to you that you’re everything to him.

Secretly eyeing the camera, you put on a pout and fiddle with the hem of his shirt. Immediately, the alarm bells go off in Jake’s mind. You’re never normally this quiet and it’s rare to see you pout. He frowns a little, eyebrows knitting together as concern washes over his face. Using his index finger and his thumb, he lifts your chin and gently rubs the skin just below your lip.

“What’s the matter?”

“I just- don’t get mad,” you begin, forcing yourself to sound sad. “But I just think you could’ve been a little bit nicer to me today.”

He had been nothing but an angel to you all day, and you felt horrendous for making him think otherwise, but alas, Tiktok had spoken and they wanted you to do this prank. So, as bad as you felt, it wouldn’t cause much harm.

“Did I do something to upset you?” He looks genuinely hurt by his own actions and guilt immediately tugs at your heart strings.

You shrug and avert your gaze downwards, focusing on the tiled floor beneath your feet. This was partly to stop yourself from giving in too quickly, you’d always been a sucker for Jake’s puppy dog eyes and you knew if you looked into them any longer, you would stop the prank.

Jake cocks his head to the side and steps closer to you, nuzzling his nose against the side of your head. You feel his breath fan over your ear and you swear your heart stops beating for a second. His fingers trail over your waist and he plants the softest kiss to the side of your head.

“I just feel like you’ve been a little mean to me today,” you continue. And he nods his head in understanding, though you know he doesn’t understand at all. Jake doesn’t know what he’s done wrong, but if you think he hasn’t been nice to you then he’s not going to argue.

“I’m sorry, can you tell me what I did to make you feel this way?”

You lean your head against his chest and bite your lip, it’s hard to contain your smile. With his sweet response mixed with the scent of his cologne fogging up your brain, you have a hard time holding onto your act and he quickly notices.

“Is this a prank?” He asks, pulling away from you.

You let the giggles slip from your mouth and nod towards the phone, that you had done your best to hide. Jake turns, his hand still on your waist, and he looks for the camera. Once his eyes land on his figure, he throws his head back and a breathy laugh falls from his lips.

“I should’ve known.”

Yes, yes he should’ve but you still made up for it with plenty of kisses.

iii.

Picking Jake up from football practice had become a ritual.

You didn’t need to be asked anymore, you’re just always there waiting for him and he loves that. The excited smile on his face whenever he sees you patiently sitting behind the wheel never gets old. Picking him up, as sad as it sounds, has become your drive to get through Tuesdays. They’re not your favourite day of the week, but knowing you get to see a smiley, yet sweaty, Sim Jaeyun at the end of the day gives you more than enough motivation.

Just like any other Tuesday, you’re waiting. You like to get there early and so, you have about fifteen more minutes until you see your favourite boy walking through the gate. Music plays softly in the background as you lean back and scroll through your comment sections—people are so sweet, though you do get a bitter taste in your mouth when you see people fawning over your boyfriend like he’s a piece of cake.

You ignore the thirst comments and look through the requests. Not many catch your eye, until you come across a particular one and a smirk appears on your face.

Fifteen minutes turns into twenty and finally you see your worn out boyfriend heading towards your car. As tired as he never fails to smile and pick up his pace. He pulls open the door and slips inside. You reach over and greet him with a chaste kiss before pulling away.

“How was practice?”

“Exhausting. Can we take a nap together when we get to your place?” He asks whilst adjusting his seatbelt.

A nap sounds amazing, and you waste no time in nodding your head. “Before we go, I went shopping today. I picked you up a few things, let me show you.”

He melts then and there. Reaching back, you grab one of the bags and aggressively tug it towards you, making sure you hit Jake on the side of the head. He hisses and turns to look at you.

You don’t even apologize.

“No this isn’t it,” you mumble to yourself.

You grip the bag and throw it back where you got it from, once again making sure to slap your boyfriend with it. He stares at you, annoyed with your aggressiveness, though you don’t look back at him and instead, you hit him a third time with a new bag but you instantly regret it. You ended up attacking him with the new pair of shoes you treated yourself to and you can tell this one pained him.

Quickly giving up on the prank, you drop the bag and reach over to rub the back of his head. “I’m sorry! I really didn’t mean to hit you that hard.”

He whips his head towards you, looking at you as though you had just murdered an entire family in front of him. “What? So you meant to hit me?”

You drop your hand and retreat back to your seat, attempting to look innocent. Jake then finds your phone, which is pointing right at him and he sees that it’s recording. You feel guilty, having not meant to hurt him so hard, you can’t meet his eye. You are about to start driving again, when you feel an impact on your arm and a yelp parts from your mouth.

Jake sits beside you, a smile on his face and a bag clutched in his hand. You scowl and he only grins wider.

“Now we’re even.”

Oh, he is evil.

iv.

On the 10th May 2021, you hit 5 million followers.

It was a shock, you rarely kept track of your follower count because you weren’t really in it for that ( though you are grateful for every single person that supports you ) so, you really hadn’t been expecting to hit such a huge milestone. In fact, you were so unexpectant, that you were sleeping at the time.

“BABY!” Your eyes flew open as the bed shook. Jake had jumped on the bed, plastering kisses all over your face. “You hit 5 mill!”

Disoriented, you blink. “Pardon?”

Jake chuckles at your sleepy state, even with messy hair and puffy eyes, he thinks you look so attractive. His dark eyes trail over your features as he uses his thumb to rub underneath your eye, almost like he was trying to wipe away your sleepiness.

“You hit 5 million followers, you did it.” His voice is softer this time, quieter but still filled with enthusiasm. You gape at him, and he laughs.

“I did?” You ask, pointing to yourself.

He nods. “You did.”

The realisation crashes down at you at once and suddenly, you feel your nose sting as tears form in your eyes. Your fingers curl around the fabric of your boyfriend’s shirt whilst the other hand comes up to cover your mouth. Stray tears drop down onto your skin. You can’t believe it. 5 million people followed you. They like your content.

Jake coos at the tears that leak from your eyes like a waterfall. He’s quick to wipe them away, before he presses a kiss to your wet cheek. He’s proud and he’s filled with pride, his baby got 5 million followers and he couldn’t wait to brag to everyone about how talented and cool you are. That’s his favourite thing to do. Jake loves to brag about you.

You sniffle and press your hands against his cheeks. Gently, you rub your nose against his own. “We did it. It’s your account just as much as it is mine, I wouldn’t have got this far without you. After all, you’re my main prank victim. So, we did it. We hit 5 million together.”

You weren’t taking all of the credit, Jake was just as involved as you and he deserves the praise. You had done this together.

“You do know Jay is never going to let you forget that he was the one who suggested uploading it to TikTok...right?”

You laugh, nodding your head. “Yep. I know he’s gloating in the group chat, right now.”

And he was. Jay was so proud of you and Jake, but most of all, he was proud of himself because without him, you would have never uploaded that first video. So, you let him have his moment.

“To millions more!” Jake cheers as he lifts the pizza in his hand, the two of you had decided to celebrate with a victorious take away and a movie marathon.

“To millions more,” you repeat softly.

Whether you had 0 followers or 5 million, as long as Sim Jaeyun was by your side, you didn’t mind.

#enhypen #enhypen scenarios #enhypen imagines #enhypen x reader #enhypen x gender neutral reader #sim jaeyun #sim jake #jake enhypen #jake scenarios #jake x reader #sim jake imagines #jaeyun x reader #jaeyun fluff #jake fluff #sim jake scenarios

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anntoldst0ries · 3 years

Text

Everything else is just the weather

Book: Open Heart Pairing: Dr Ethan Ramsey x F!MC (Dr Noelle Valentine) Word Count: ~5.3k (I sinned!) Summary: Ethan takes Elle out on their “first” date. Category: Fluff Warnings: None

A/N: It has literally taken me ages to finish this fic. To the point that I couldn’t look at it anymore, but here it is. I had it in mind for a really long time and now that OH is back, I feel like I’m ready to show it to the world. As always thank you for your support and I hope you like it!

This fic is part 2 of birthday present for my friend, part 1 is the fan art which you can see here. Once you read the fic, the fan art makes more sense :)

This is my submission for CFWC Silly Love Stories, Day 12: Date night.

Loud knocks resonated throughout the room.

"Come in!"

"Good morning, Mrs. Peterson.”

“Good morning, Dr Valentine. I think you are the only doctor in this hospital with some sort of manners, everyone else just waltzes in here as if it was a damn barn!”

“Hospital or no hospital, everyone has their right to privacy.”

“Thank you, child. Once again, please call me Faye."

"Alright Faye, but only if you call me Elle.” She smiled sweetly, and the whole room seemed to be suddenly lit by a thousand suns.

“How are you feeling? Are the meds making a difference?"

"They are. I am ready to be discharged today.”

"Not so fast. I am not ready to say goodbye to you yet."

“Why would you possibly like to be lumbered with an old nuisance like me for even a second longer than necessary?”

Elle just laughed and shook her head. The ‘nuisance’, as the elderly lady so lovingly put it, was exactly what she loved about her job. She loved spending time with her patients, she loved their stories and their worldly wisdom. It made her sad to see how many of them thought they didn’t matter or considered themselves and their lives boring. To her, they were anything but.

Many of Edenbrook’s staff members kept asking themselves: what is it about her? She was a great doctor, no two ways about it, and she was a genuinely nice person. But what was the source of power she had over people? If she woke up one day and decided to start a rebellion, patients would have most certainly followed her, even if it meant they’d be leaving the premises of the hospital with naked butts or trailing their IVs behind them. Doctors, nurses, administration, cleaners and security would follow shortly. She only had to say a word.

And how on Earth was she capable of turning Dr Ramsey, the grizzly bear of Edenbrook, into a benign teddy bear with as little as one look? It was beyond everyone’s apprehension.

Had they spent more time actually observing her, rather than gossiping in the corners, the answer would have unveiled in front of them within minutes.

It was very simple.

Noelle was truly curious about people. She genuinely liked them and was determined to get to know their story, for it helped her diagnose them faster and also satiated the young doctor’s hunger for knowledge.

Patients never felt like “curious cases” or “numbers” in her presence. They were… themselves - people with hopes, dreams, fears, pet peeves and odd habits. They were human.

So little and yet so much.

Those never touched by serious illnesses often failed to understand that sickness strips you of your dignity and becomes your identity. Your true self becomes covered by this weird, annoying sticker that wouldn’t come off no matter how hard you tried to remove it.

But this young woman, despite the nature of her profession, somehow managed to notice what was hiding beneath this misleading layer.

Had all these gossipers spoken to her patients, that’s exactly what they would have heard.

"What's happening today?" The older lady asked with a flick of curiosity in her wrinkle-haloed eyes.

"What do you mean, Faye?" The young doctor sounded genuinely baffled by the out-of-the-blue question.

"Well, I am no diagnostician, but I believe I am rather observant and you radiate with happiness. Something special is happening today, am I right?"

"Yeah, you are right." Elle blushed like a teenager caught in a lie. "My boyfriend is taking me on a surprise date today, but he won’t say a word about it, so I'm super excited to find out what he planned for us. He usually isn't one for romantic gestures, so the secrecy is killing me."

"Do you think he's gonna pop the big question?" Faye’s eyes lit up with excitement.

"No, we're not there...yet." Elle faked a smile, but a tone of doubt and sadness coloured her voice. They probably never will be, those things weren’t in the cards for Ethan, as he already stressed once.

But once was enough and she didn’t dare mention the subject again.

"Well, I'm pretty sure he's got some big guns in store, I would if I had a lady like you." - a male patient lying in the bed adjacent to Elle’s patient added smiling flirtatiously.

"Jerry, you were supposed to focus on getting better, not stealing my girlfriend." They all jumped when a deep baritone echoed throughout the room, hitting present company like a wrecking ball. She must have left the door ajar or Ethan could penetrate the walls soundlessly, because no one heard him coming.

Exactly how long has he been standing there for and how much did he hear?

"Dr. Ramsey, flirting makes your blood flow faster. Isn't it the very definition of life itself?” Jerry’s tone was brisk and lively.

"Well, it definitely isn't the definition of recovery after a heart attack." Ethan used his authoritative doctor’s voice but knew this wasn't a battle he was going to win. Jerry had something he didn't: a couple more decades of life experience under his belt and even the best medical school in the country couldn’t compete with this.

"Besides, Dr. Ramsey, I don't think that the beautiful Dr. Valentine here fancies old farts like me."

"That's where you are wrong, Jerry, looks like this is exactly the type I fancy." The two women laughed, however Ethan was far from amused. "Dr. Ramsey is 10 years older than me."

"10 years? What is 10 years in these times? Nothing. When I was getting married 40 years ago, it was something. But today? Look at all them playboys with girls younger than my granddaughter. 10 years is actually a very healthy difference. Men are immature and slower with growing up emotionally. So I'd say you've caught up, Dr. Ramsey, and the two of you are emotional peers now.”

“Thank you for the fascinating lesson in human psychology, Jerry. To think I’ve wasted all this time and money on medical school and no one taught me this.”

“Dr. Ramsey, it’s because schools and useful knowledge are mutually exclusive.”

Elle and Faye were on the verge of bursting out in laughter, but managed to keep their composure and used the non-verbal communication of exchanging glances instead.

Once they made sure their patients had everything they need, Ethan and Elle wished them a good day and promised to stop by in 2 days, as the following day was their day off.

The moment the door closed behind them, Ethan crossed his arms on his chest.

"I lose you from my sight for one second and this happens. 5 more minutes with Jerry and I'd be single again."

"At least no one wants to poke your eyes out for being with me."

"And someone wants to poke yours?"

"Where do I start... nurses, who had a crush on you long before I even set foot in Edenbrook? Female interns? Anyone, who has a pair of functioning eyes and ever looked at you?"

She was adorable when she was doing this, her whole body overtaken by excitement and her hands waving. When she was talking about something really important to her she wasn't just conversing with her mouth, she was doing it with her whole body.

Suddenly, his pager painfully reminded Ethan that this was neither the place nor the time to lose himself in adoration.

"I need to go, I'm completely swamped today and I have my favourite cherry-on-top board meeting. In case I don't see you for the rest of your shift - I’ll pick you up at 7."

He was gone before she was able to form a response. Was it just her or was Dr Ramsey weirdly… nervous?

* * * * * * * *

At 7pm sharp, Ethan Ramsey curled his palm in a fist and gently knocked. The door opened in an instant, as if someone knew he'd been standing there for the past few minutes.

"Ethan! I mean Dr. Ramsey...please come in!" Sienna squeaked with nervous excitement as she let him in.

"Outside of Edenbrook Ethan is just fine, Sienna. If you don't mind me calling you by your first name, of course."

"Mm..mme? No, yes, I mean... Elle is on the balcony." She tried to hide her embarrassment and motioned towards the tall windows surrounding the living room. Some time ago, he would have been oddly proud to have such an intimidating effect on people - nowadays, more than anything, he was amused. Has he really changed so much?

The answer to his question was leaning against the railing, glass of wine in her hand. Gauzy, flowery dress enveloped her frame and tanned skin.

For Ethan, it was as clear as crystal: summer had the face and scent of Noelle Valentine.

Long before she started leaving her toothbrush in his apartment and sleeping in his old JH t-shirts, Ethan noticed that whenever he laid eyes on her, his whole body started acting in a very irrational way. His doctor’s instincts prompted him to think of all types of biological causes and chemical reactions in the brain. Then, when he sort of admitted to himself it’s not just pure science, Ethan leaned towards the forbidden fruit theory - the more he couldn’t have his drug, the more he was craving it.

But the feeling never disappeared. Whenever he wouldn’t see her for a while - be that an hour, a day, or just when she went to take a shower or make a coffee - the very moment her face came into his view again, he felt his stomach somersaulting.

Every. Single. Time.

It wasn’t any different now.

"Drinking without me?"

She almost dropped the glass when his voice stopped the train of thought in her head. But then she saw his face, the way too seldom relaxed muscles and a barely-there smile.

A perfectly tailored shirt clung to his torso marvellously. If not in medicine, he surely would have made a name for himself in the fashion industry. Fortunately for her, the idea never crossed his mind.

The warm wind blew in her face, carrying the scent of expensive cologne which overwhelmed her nostrils. She didn’t know this one, so it must have been new. But she did know that smelling it for the whole evening while staring at his handsome face will be a pure torture.

Simply put, she was a goner.

"I don't know why, but I was quite nervous. Had to summon the courage somehow.”

“As you should be. After all, it's not every day that one goes on their first date."

She looked at him as if she’d just been told that a UFO landed on the roof.

“On a what?”

"Well, I was thinking a lot lately about how we never had a first date. Nothing was ever...typical with us. I promised myself I will do my best to fix things that caused you pain or deprived you of the things you deserved. Maybe I cannot fix some immediately, but this one I can, so I will."

Her eyes, overbrimming with affection struck him like thousand lightnings. Thank god a comfortable silence fell between them - had she asked him a question, it would have been clear that right now he is nothing but a simpering moron.

With this in mind, he took his hands from behind his back, holding a small bouquet of pink gerberas.

"These are my favourites." Her face instantly illuminated at the well known sight and smell. "How did you know?”

"I had some amazing helpers."

Elle instantly turned her head left and looked inside, where grinning, Sienna was showing her the thumbs up.

"Wow, now I actually wish I'd downed the whole bottle."

"I'm glad you didn't. I want to go on a date with a woman, not her lifeless body, even though the body itself is very appealing. Shall we?”

“King of compliments…”

* * * * * * * *

"You actually look like you are having a good time, Dr Ramsey.”

"Why wouldn't I? There is alcohol, sitting under the sky definitely has its charm and the company is acceptable." She playfully swatted his arm, the gesture a quick reminder of how comfortable they felt with each other, something he constantly remembered to never take for granted.

“Although I love this, I still don’t understand why you dragged me all the way outside Boston, I’m pretty sure the rooftop bars are pretty acceptable there, too. A bit more crowded though, that’s for sure.”

“Are you complaining about the fact that we have this entire place to ourselves? I know the owner and he was indebted to me.”

“Of course he was.” Looks like the whole town is indebted to Ethan freakin’ Ramsey.

“With regards to why I brought you here… you’ll just have to wait and see.”

Gosh. She couldn’t decide whether the mysterious side of Ethan Ramsey was hot as hell or annoying as hell. But she didn’t really have time to contemplate, because her companion asked her a question.

“Why did you become a doctor?” The ocean eyes pierced her to the core and she had a feeling that even if she was the best actress in the world, there was no way she’d be able to hide something from this man.

“That’s a terrible change of subject. Also, I must have told you like a million times already.”

“No, you never told me.”

When she looked at him and really, really thought about it… she suddenly realised Ethan was right. Elle told the story so many times she sort of… assumed she told Ethan, too.

“Are you sure you want to hear it today? It’s a pretty sad story, a mood killer I’d say.”

“It’s what makes you you, so yes, I want to hear all about it - the good, the bad and the indifferent.”

“I’ll tell you, but I need to ask something first. Why now? We’ve known each other for a while and you just… I just sort of assumed this isn’t the type of conversation you’d like to hold.”

“You’ve hit the nail on the head.” Ethan’s expression was gentle, not a hint of irony in his voice. “I’ve known you for a while now, but there are still so many things about you that I don’t know. At first, I didn’t want to ask, because asking these questions meant admitting that there is something more between us. What a fail would that be, after I’ve mastered the art of denial.” He laughed, but it wasn’t a bitter or a nervous laugh, it was a genuine banter between them, as the British half of her soul liked to call it. “But you made me want to dig deeper.”

Was it the heat that made her catch her breath, or did it have nothing to do with the temperature?

“Plus, this is sort of what first dates are for, right? I’m sorry for skipping right to the more complex questions. It’s not that I don’t want to know what you were afraid of as a child, I want to know all the details… but it feels like the atmosphere calls for something…bigger.”

So she told him all about her friend, how she fell ill, how she couldn’t be saved and how the experience wreaked havoc on her whole life, tears glistening in her eyes at the mere memory of the events that shaped who she was today.

Ethan listened, his whole body tense and eyes transfixed. She was giving him one of the most fragile parts of her and he had to make sure his hands were there to catch, carry and care for this treasure.

“And that’s when I realised that if I focused on becoming the best doctor I could be, then maybe one day, I’d be that person who has an answer, who can solve a mystery and save a relationship that means the world to someone. Sometimes, people don’t realise that when a person dies, it’s not only them that’s gone. The part of someone who stays, who has to deal with the whole ‘me after you’ - that part is gone, too. So for me, in a way, this meant saving more than one life.”

For a couple of seconds he didn’t move. Then, without saying a single word and with an unreadable expression he got up and offered her a hand, which she silently accepted. He led her to the railing, where the sun was slowly sinking into the boundless waters of Quincy Bay.

His lips found the all too well known way to her forehead, placing a loving kiss on her delicate skin.

“I am so proud of you.” There was something so mesmerising in his whisper, sending a shiver down her spine.

“As a mentor or as a boyfriend?”

“Both. I want you to know that your dedication to people who rely on you is astounding and hardly present in doctors your age. Or any age, for that matter.”

“Wow, Dr Ramsey, smooth. Trying to hit on me with a recycled pick-up line used on a national TV? No wonder you didn’t have too many girlfriends.”

“No, I didn’t. But I believe everyone has a limit of luck they can get per life. And looking at you, I got a couple of lifetimes worth of luck.”

This was enough to render her speechless. She smiled and at this very moment he knew he would do anything to make her smile like this. She wrapped him around her pinky finger and suddenly his whole existence revolved around finding ways of seeing her curve these breathtaking lips as often as possible and making sure he is the reason she smiles… not crying her eyes out.

Although the other didn’t know, because none of them said it out loud, they both thought the same thing.

This feels so right.

There isn’t a hint of awkwardness in the fact that they can go from being serious or emotionally vulnerable to funny and teasing in seconds.

In one effortless movement, Ethan spun her and pressed her back against his chest. Then, he started placing a series of tender kisses along her jawline and the crook of her neck, slowly moving towards her shoulder.

Come on, just say it Ramsey. It doesn’t get any better than this.

He wrapped her palm in his and pointed them towards the sky.

“There they are - the Little Dipper and the Big Dipper.” Their intertwined fingers were jumping from one tiny flashing point to the other, as if they were playing connect the dots. “And that’s Orion’s Belt.”

“I really don’t get why at this point I’m still surprised that you’re good at everything.”

Elle was drunk on his every word, as this annoying trait of Ethan Ramsey being the know-it-all was actually one of her favourite things about him.

As for Ethan, he couldn’t help but think that life wasn’t perfect and was never going to be. But this - this moment - it was in fact perfect. Why take chances of ruining it, when so many things can go wrong?

What if she doesn't say it back?

What if she's just gonna laugh at him or tell him he had it all wrong.

What if he misinterpreted everything and she never thought about him this way?

He was terrified of being this exposed. The last person he loved so much left him without batting an eyelid and disappeared for 25 fucking years.

Maybe it was better to live in a perfect illusion than a reality in which there was even a 0.01% chance she doesn't love him back.

So they both drowned in the moment, drifted in the sea of rapture, lost in the illusion that it can all last forever.

It was her who broke the silence.

“I’m getting a bit cold, is it ok if we call it a night?”

“Right, of course.”

“Thank you for the first date, I loved it.”

Handing her his jacket (her favourite, the dark green leather one) Ethan was furious at himself.

Maybe he was broken. Maybe he will remain broken forever. Maybe that’s the way it must be.

“Do you want to spend the night at mine?” The question slipped his tongue before he was able to fully reflect on it.

“At yours? Unless you have some secret place I don’t know about, just a quick reminder - I live there too.”

“Since this was our first date, I thought it was a gentlemanly thing to ask.”

“In that case… I am afraid I have the ‘after the 3rd date’ sleepover rule, Dr Ramsey.”

* * * * * * * *

The morning came all too soon and the hot, ruthless rays of the rising sun announced that Ethan is now way past his regular wake up and get up time. He barely slept, tossing and turning, replaying every second of the evening in his head.

His hand mindlessly reached for what he hoped to be the familiar curves and softness of the body he adored so much.

But his palm hit the mattress with a loud thud. The bed was empty.

The all-too-well known feeling of hopelessness slipped into the doctor's mind with ease. What did he expect? He was acting weird the previous day. First date, what a stupid idea. She must have realised something is wrong with him and finally left.

But before he was able to fully wallow in the mud of pity, the feeling was soon replaced by an old friend Ethan haven’t heard from for a long time.

Panic.

Where was she? Is she ok? What if something happened to her and he was just sleeping like a log instead of being there to protect her. He couldn’t stand the thought of losing her… again. Something grabbed his chest in a tight grip and wouldn’t let go.

Scenes flashed before his eyes, vivid and bright. Their hands touching through the glass wall. Her hand cupping his cheek through the layer of hazmat suit.

He got out of bed at the speed of sound and started running around the apartment, but she was nowhere to be seen.

Suddenly, he noticed.

The balcony door was opened wide.

Shit.

Heart in his mouth, Ethan crossed the distance between his kitchen island and the balcony door in the blink of an eye.

Elle was just serving pancakes outside. The goddamn pancakes. The only thing he couldn’t cook. The one thing she kept teasing him about and he rolled his eyes every time she did.

God, he promised himself he will never learn how to make them, if it meant she would just tease him forever.

She was smiling as widely as ever, putting the sun and everything else in the world to shame. Ethan was still a bit shaken and his uneven breathing gave him away. Elle finally noticed his presence.

“Good morning, I was just about to—“

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

They both froze.

The tension in the silence that had just set in was so thick you could cut it with a knife.

But the silence didn’t last long. As one man, with eyes full of disbelief, they both murmured simultaneously:

“What did you just say?”

This time, he felt obliged to break the silence.

"I...I...I mean, I…"

Damn it, get it together, idiot.

"I didn't mean to…”

Great, Ramsey, keep digging an even deeper hole for yourself, then crawl in and stay there forever.

"You didn't mean to say it?”

"Yes. No. I mean, damn it, I am making things worse, aren't I?”

She didn’t set him straight.

"The thing is, I wanted to say it yesterday. I had it all planned, I took you for a first date and I wanted to say it for the first time yesterday.”

"Why did it have to be yesterday?”

“Give me a minute.”

She just rolled her eyes, but Ethan didn’t have a chance to notice before disappearing inside. A few moments later he re-emerged, his face and torso covered by a neatly wrapped, rectangle-shaped object.

"What's this?"

"Something you should have unpacked yesterday, but then... life happened."

Elle sat down on cold tiles, her hands trembling with a mix of fear and excitement. And just like he did months ago, he took her hand in his, only this time he cupped his own cheek with her palm and placed the most tender kiss on the inside of her hand.

It was her favourite medicine, a remedy for all things wrong.

He sat beside her and nodded at the mysterious package. With impatience growing inside of her, Elle has torn the paper up.

Inside was a dark blue, framed print - the colour of it an instant reminder of her favourite set of irises.

She studied everything with intent. A circle must have been representing the earth and the irregular dots and lines must have been the stars and constellations.

"A map of the sky? That's beautiful, Ethan."

He knew immediately that although her delight was sincere, she had absolutely no clue what she was looking at and why she was looking at it.

“It's not just any map of the sky.” Ethan explained gently, hints of pride colouring his voice. “It's a map of the Boston sky from exactly a year ago. Well, a year and a day.” He smiled faintly, now a shade of sorrow in his enchanting voice.

Silence. Was she supposed to know what that meant?

“Aren’t you full of mysteries today? Ok, you need to throw me a lifebelt here. What's so special about the sky from a year and a day ago?”

“For the world? Probably not too much. For me? Everything.”

At this stage of their relationship, she knew a lot about Ethan’s behaviours, triggers, his body language. And not just a relationship as a couple, but also everything that came before Ethan became someone she was running through life with (the life of two doctors in one of the busiest and most prestigious hospitals was certainly not a walk in the park).

But it still fascinated her how his demeanour changed whenever the subject was serious, whenever he was talking about something that truly mattered to him. It was as if he’d stripped down of all the layers and let her look into his bare soul. These rare moments of vulnerable intimacy meant more to her than any night of passion they ever shared.

Her eyes turned to him in pledge, because as much as she wanted to, Dr Valentine still couldn’t fully comprehend the scene unraveling in front of her.

“Read the description below the map.”

Dear God, did she actually hear shyness in his voice?

She skimmed through the image again, and there it was, right at the bottom. Elle was so focused on trying to decipher the meaning of the image that she didn’t notice the words below.

The words which explained everything.

I WILL NEVER FORGET THE DAY

THAT MADE ME REALISE

YOU ARE THE SKY

EVERYTHING ELSE IS JUST THE WEATHER

Her emerald eyes brimmed with hot tears as the meaning dawned upon her. Words were very unnecessary, but now that he summoned the courage to speak, there was still a lot he wanted to put into words. He gently took the frame from her hands and leaned it securely against the wall.

Taking her palms into his, he placed delicate kisses on her knuckles, his lips tracing the shape of these two tiny hands, which held all of him. Everything he had, everything he was and was going to be, he placed in those two fragile palms, with an unspoken hope that they will hold him and catch him if he falls.

“Look at me.” The words were pulsing with care and affection, even though his voice coloured them in serious and desperate shades.

“One year ago… and a day from today…” He smiled and she felt the warmth spilling inside of her. The power he had over her was beyond the limits of understanding.

Little did she know that the object of her affection was lost in the same thought.

“I was standing exactly where we stand right now. It was dark and the view wasn’t that spectacular.” He freed one of his hands, but only to make contact with her cheek to caress it slowly. In this moment, he had to touch her any way that he could. With his hands. With his eyes. With his soul.

“But I always found comfort in staring at the sky. When I was at med school, I had countless moments of doubt, I wanted to quit more times than I can count. So I used to go to a secluded place at night and stare at the sky. It made me realise how, in one respect, I am just a grain of sand in the universe and how little my problems are. Funnily enough, this thought actually brought me a sense of comfort. If I am as little as I think I am, then what is the harm in being brave and taking chances? A wise man once said… There are some things that are worth any risk.”

She giggled through the tears, the sweet sound soothing his shattered nerves.

“I was standing right here and I never felt more miserable in my life. And I couldn’t understand why, for God’s sake. I was thriving at work. I had everything figured out and planned. I was pushing you to be the best you could be and I watched you turn into someone who would one day be far greater than me. But you looked so sad, so… broken. You already know I can’t just gloss over you feeling down. The sadder you were, the more miserable I felt. One evening, I was having a glass of scotch and I remembered some tiny exchange we’ve had earlier in the day, literally a chit chat. No idea what it was about. But I remembered your smile and your laugh. Every tiniest move of your muscles, your eyes, how your hair set around your face. It made me happy. Even if it was just for 5 minutes, knowing that you are happy in that very moment filled my chest with lightness. That’s when I realised I want to be the person who makes you feel this way.”

She blinked the first time in a while, as if she was afraid to make the tiniest movement, afraid it will all disappear and turn out to be a dream. Giant teardrops rolled down her angelic face, trailing the path of joy.

“Noelle Sky Valentine, I love you. I have loved you for a long time but I was too stubborn to let myself give in. And that, as you already know, will always be one of my biggest regrets.”

“Ethan, I don’t… I’m so sorry, I just don’t know what to say.” Her voice was saturated with emotions.

“I’d be lying if I said this wasn’t the reaction I was hoping for.“

“I love you too, Ethan Jonah Ramsey. You are by far the most complicated and stubborn person I have ever met. You are… everything I never knew I looked for in another human being.”

Once he heard her say it back, he couldn't get enough of it and a lifetime didn't feel like enough to tell her he loves her, as many times as he wished to.

“But I do have to mention this, Dr Ramsey… from the first date to a love confession in less than 24 hours? I’m sorry, I think this is moving too fast.”

“I’ll show you too fast…but I’m afraid we need to get inside, I don’t want the whole world and its wife to see how I teach you a thing or two.”

Ethan scooped her in his arms and carried her inside, despite her mock protests. He smiled and corrected himself.

He wanted for the whole world to see.

Because the whole world was right there.

In his arms.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

If you’ve gotten this far, I need you to know you are absolutely amazing 💗

Tag 🏷 list: @jamespotterthefirst @romewritingshop @romereadingshop @genevievemd @starrystarrytrouble @terrm9 @mrs-ramsey @maurine07 @gryffindordaughterofathena @mercury84choices @lovingramsey @qrkowna @openheartfanfics @choicesficwriterscreations @lisha1valecha @oldminniemcg @iemcpbchoices @tsrookie @fayeswiftie @levinsdowneyy @brooks-eden @poudredevie @queencarb @caseyvalentineramsey @lucy-268 @tenaciousdeputydreamfriend @alwaysmychoices-sideblog @whippedforethanfreakingramsey @schnitzelbutterfingers @the-pale-goddess @lem-20 @wingedhairstylemusicweasel @liaromancewriter @ohchoices @archxxronrookie

#ethan ramsey x mc #ethan x mc #dr ethan ramsey #play choices #open heart #open heart fic #cfwc silly love stories #choices fic writers creations #fics of the week #ethan ramsey

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taeyohonic · 4 years

Text

stolen dances | chap. II

summary: sometimes supporting the person you love is the hardest challenge you’ll ever face.

pairing: jeon jungkook x fem!reader

rating: m

warning: swearing

additional tags: f2l, ceo!jungkook, bestfriend!jungkook, shrink!yoongi, my best friend’s wedding meets 27 dresses (if the boss/secretary couple had happened), angst-y

words: 1000

links: prologue, chap. I, chap. II, chap. III, chap. IV, chap. V

note: lower case letters intended

“and what did you do?”, your therapist asks with an edge in his voice. you’ve known yoongi long enough to recognize his strained tone even through the phone.

“i said thank you and agreed to go on his honeymoon with him and his wife”

“______”

“of course, i didn’t. i’m not an idiot”, you huff.

“not anymore”, yoongi corrects you now that his heart stopped beating this fast.

“i told him they are both mad for even thinking this was a good idea”, you nod to yourself as you open your door. “and then i demanded a premium treatment at this adorable spa.”

“the one in gangnam? with the tiny clouds on their label?”, he asks while you throw away your high heels and slip on the fluffy slippers your best friend gifted you as a housewarming present.

“exactly! you remember!”, you exclaim and walk mindlessly into your kitchen; the half-eaten takeout from yesterday is calling your name.

“you know i’m required to document our sessions… even when you talk about a facial for thirteen minutes”, yoongi teases and you open the fridge to smile at your cold pizza. yes!

“so, if i asked my cosmetician about a certain min yoongi, she would have never heard from you?”, you question and bite into the cheesy gold. damn, that’s good, even better than yesterday.

yoongi doesn’t answer, but you can just picture his scrunched nose. “don’t think i haven’t noticed how soft your skin has gotten in recent weeks, yoongs.”

“it’s called fan service, _____.”

you would roll your eyes if you hadn’t seen how excited his fans get when the rapper takes his time for a few selcas.

“nevertheless, i just wanted to call and share this milestone”, you say, sitting down on your couch.

“and i am proud of you, ______. i am – don’t get me wrong. but right now, you’re really crashing my date”, your therapist huffs and you flinch. damn, you are the worst client slash friend ever.

“sorry yoongs”, you apologize, remorse coloring your words. you hear the quiet chuckle at the other end of the line. “no need to feel sorry, ______. there are always two people involved in a conversation.”

then you both hang up and he goes back to his third glass of wine with a beautiful young doctor in a fancy restaurant while you devour the rest of your pizza, an old kdrama runs in the background to keep you company.

“how important is this?”, jungkook asks and pushes the macaron away from him. you roll your eyes at your best friend, clearly irritated by his lack of motivation.

“sorry if i’m keeping you from bringing world peace to the nation”, you snip back and steal the abandoned macaron.

“oh, i like that one”, you say, still chewing on the sweet pastry. jungkook is sitting in front of you, dressed in a coal colored three-piece suit with a vibrant green tie. you don’t know why you’re both in his office on a saturday, but you stopped questioning his schedule years ago.

jungkook’s eyes open comically wide as you swallow down the treat. you hum in approval.

“wait, _____. let me try as well”, he pleads and tries to lean forward across the wooden conference desk. but you are both so far away, he isn’t even close to getting in your personal space. you do learn from your mistakes.

“nah ah, kookie”, you mock him and scribble some notes on your ipad. the champagne raspberry one is a strong contender. “you’ve had your chance.”

the man in front of you huffs. “i thought we’d do the whole ‘it’s important’ ‘why’ ‘because i said so’ ‘why’ ‘because’ skit with the food being pushed back and forth.”

you try not to laugh at his imitation of your voice. “well, glad to know that you do think from time to time.”

your best friend shakes his head and grabs the pink cardboard filled with the last macarons. there are still three left – lemon strawberry, double chocolate and green tea. you’ve spent an extra twenty minutes on the treadmill this morning just to taste the rich chocolate flavor on your tongue. and judging by the mischief in jungkook’s eyes he knows these are your favorites.

before you can run around the table to stop this… man child, he has already picked up the three pastries and stuffed them in his mouth. his smile is tinted with chocolate as he looks at your shocked expression.

“yo-u… you are… so immature”, you hiss and grab your ipad tighter. “you know how much i love the chocolate one.”

jungkook’s cheeks are filled with stolen food; they remind you more of a hamster than a multimillionaire. your best friend is visibly pleased with himself as he moans at the taste.

you are shooting daggers at him while he continues to eat, not a care in the world. with angered mutters you start to write down some nonsense on your device. you don’t want to watch his gleeful expression. after a beat of silence jungkook start to talk, half the macarons still in his mouth.

“i … know you like them”, he says and swallows, “that’s why we’ll get the chocolate and the green tea.”

your stare moves up to his eyes, which are smiling down at your dumb folded expression. “i wasn’t saying this isn’t important, _____”, he explains. “i just think it’s moot to taste test stuff, when we already know what we like.”

“but i don’t like green tea”, you say – not ready to admit that maybe tasting twelve different kinds of macarons was more of a fun activity than a mandatory one. jungkook shakes his head at your deflection.

“i know, ____. believe me. i’ve never seen someone look that disgusted at matcha ice cream”, he chuckles, “but it’s her favorite.”

sometimes you are really spoiled from his attention. of course, his fiancée likes green tea, it’s healthy and vibrant, not as heavy and oily as cacao.

“we don’t have to get the chocolate ones, you know? we could stay in the range of tea. i saw this jasmine one, but i didn’t bring it with me… let me quickly…”, you are rambling as you hear jungkook call your name with intent.

“____”, he says and traces his lips with his fingers to collect the chocolate smudge. “if she gets her favorite, i want mine there as well.”

______

i know... it’s been more than a year, but a kind hearted soul on ao3 reminded me, that this exists and i really like jungkook and yoongi here, so i thought, i’d pick up a pen and write again for this story. it will be drabble style, but i hope you enjoy it as much as i do! please leave a comment, feedback, like or a reblog if you liked it! if anyone wants to get tagged, just comment 😊 all the love, dana

#ficswithluv #btswriterscollective #jungkook x reader #jungkook x you #jeon jungkook angst #ceo!jungkook #idol!jungkook #rich!jungkook #jungkook fanfic #jungkook scenarios #bts scenarios #bts fluff

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anythingandeverything1d · 4 years

Text

SNL

You were lounging on the couch trying to watch the bachelor while Harry was anxiously pacing in front of the tv. His head was down and he was talking to himself. You sighed loudly trying to get his attention but he continued pacing and practicing. “Babe.” you tried. Again, nothing. “Haz.” He didn't even look your direction. “Harry.” He actually turned his back to you. “Harry Edward Styles.” you said louder. His head snapped up, his green eyes full of anxiety as they set upon yours. “Babe what are you doing?”

“Practicing. I have SNL to film tomorrow.” He turned to go back to what he was doing but you stopped him again.

“Harry.” He looked up again. “I asked what you were doing. Not what you think you're doing.” You stood up, walked over to him and held tightly onto his hands, pressing a gentle kiss to them. He sighed and pulled you into a tight hug.

“I just want to be good. I don't want people to doubt me.”

“Since when have you cared what people think?” you asked while tracing lines in his back.

“I don't..I just - ugh. I have loved SNL for so long. I want to be the kind of person I enjoy seeing on the show. I want to be funny.”

You smiled and looked up at him. “Haz you are funny.”

“No everyone thinks its cute I try to be funny. I want to actually be funny.”

“I think you are actually funny.” you tap his nose. “You make me laugh everyday.”

“Yeah but your my girlfriend you have to laugh.” He half smiles and kisses your forehead.

“I don't have to do anything just because I’m your girlfriend.” Harry was a little calmer so you stepped and pulled him to the couch.

He sighed and stood back up. “Im not good enough for this. I don't know how to be funny.” He had tears in your eyes and your heart lurched a little wanting to make it better.

“Harry don't ever say you're not good enough. You're freaking Harry Edward Styles. You were in the BIGGEST boyband in the world. You topped charts with your solo career. You've traveled all over the world, seen things people can only dream of seeing. You get to do what you love. Harry your incredible. You're a down to earth person. If you just be yourself and don't worry about what you think people are going to think of you, you will kill SNL tomorrow. I promise.”

You stood up and circled your arms around his waist. You placed a gentle kiss to his lips and he smiled. “But what if people don't think I’m funny?”

“Then they don't think youre funny. What are you going to lose? You love SNL. Its been a dream of yours to do and now youre actually doing it. It doesn't matter if youre good or not because youre going to have fun doing it.”

He sighed and nodded. “I know. I just want to feel prepared...”

“Then lets practice. Come on.” You turned the tv off and dragged him to the piano. “Preform your monologue for me.”

Harry stood there anxious and nerves but you nodded and pushed him along. He smiled and took a deep breath. “It is so great to be here hosting Saturday Night Live for the first time.” You smiled and asked him to continue. “I am so excited to be here as more than just a musical guest. It-it feels” he stumbled and looked at you.

“What does it feel like?”

He thought and then smiled, “Kinda like the feeling when you know I found out you liked me as more than just a friend. Like when we are taking things to the next level.”

You smiled and laughed. “I love that. So restart from It feels like..”

“It feels amazing to be here. Just like the feeling of finding out someone likes you as more than just a friend. SNL and I are taking things to the next level.” You grinned and gave him a thumbs up while taking a drink of water. “And just like all my serious relationships, we are all going to spend one incredible night together.” You spit the water out of your mouth choking and laughing. Harry laughed as you wiped your mouth with his sleeve.

“Is it too much?” he asked worried he had crossed a line.

“No. I loved it. It was a very you type of joke.”

“Okay are you sure...you are dating me..I don't want to make you feel a certain way..”

“Harry keep it seriously I loved it.”

He nodded and continued on. “This is a new territory for me. I get to do some comedy tonight but I do want to make one thing clear to everyone. My priority is the music. It goes music, then comedy.” He smiled as he said the next part, trying not to laugh at his own jokes and that made you smile even bigger. “Well let's me honest. It goes music, then fantastic hair, then comedy, and then family and then friends.” You laughed and could tell he was feeling more confident in himself. “But ultimately I am a very serious musician.” Harry gave you a very serious face you and laughed harder wiping a tear from your eye.

“Harry-” you started but he interrupted.

“And nothing says serious musician like talking and playing the piano.” He sat at the piano next to you and smiled, bumping your shoulder. “Oh yeah that feels good he” he started playing some keys while he continued talking. “You know.” he looked at you with a raised eyebrow. “In Britain we play piano on the other side of the road.” You laughed again and he took that as a sign to continue. “Now you know that I’m not in a boyband anymore. I’m in a man band now.”

You stood up laughing and trying to catch your breath. Harry was laughing at his own joke but more at your reaction. “A man band” you cried. Harry laughed and looked confused.

“I am a man.” He argued.

You smiled and took a breath. “I know but Ive never heard that before. It was a good one. Continue.” you told him catching your breath.

He cleared his throat and looked at you. “I was in a band called One Direction. How crazy would it be if they were here tonight.”

Your mouth dropped. “How did you arrange for tha-”

“Well they're not here. But wouldn't it be crazy if they were though?” You smiled and rolled your eyes sitting next to him again. “They're not. But I love those guys. They’re like my brothers. Niall, Liam, Louis, and uh -oh yeah Ringo.” You smacked his arm laughing but he continued on. “Yeah thats it. We're just so grateful Simon Cowell grew us in those test tubes.”

“Harry!”

“You know for me its not about the fame or the money.” you nodded your head. “Its about the music, and the art. The art and the music and the music and the art. I believe that music is universal in language. Especially music performed in English because thats the only language I understand. Now maybe some of you aren't convinced I’m a serious musician. You may be asking yourself is he really playing that piano right now? Well if in doubt take a look. Read them and weep. I love being here at SNL, so much history.” He paused and looked at you. “I have learned so much this week so heres a few secrets about the show. Did you know they put make up on the boys too?” you laughed and he smirked. “That is funny. In fact the make up team is so talented, I’m actually Kate McKinnon. And heres a secret about the Rockefeller Christmas tree. It’s Jewish. And also, everyone thinks the cast does a lot of cocaine.”

“Oh my god Harry-”

“They don't. Thats why the shows not good anymore. Except tonight. I think im just about ready to take you home. Mmm yeah that is music. We've got a great show so stick around well be right back.” He stood up and waved. You clapped and stood up, wrapping your arms around his body so that you were climbing up his back. You pressed a kiss on his cheek and laughed.

“Harry that was so good. You have nothing to worry about.”

“Did you like my jokes?”

“I loved them. I think you're going to momentarily disappoint One Directions fans but they will talk about that moment for weeks.”

“Which part the boys being there or Ringo?”

You laughed and shook your head, “All of it.” Harry sat you down and you hugged him tightly again. “Im seriously so proud of you.”

“Don't be too proud yet. I haven't done it yet.” He blushed but still held his smile.

“Babe you're going to be amazing. I don't even doubt it.”

You pressed your lips to his and he smiled, kissing you back. “Thanks for being the best cheerleader.”

“Anytime Haz, now can we finish the bachelor please?”

Harry nodded and scooped you into his arms, carrying you back to the couch. “Which fool do we have tonight.”

“Still Peter. He’s playing games though telling all the girls he loves them.”

“Psh what a fool.” Harry kissed your face over and over and you laughed. “Do you really think I’m that funny?”

“I think you are hilarious.” You kissed him again and smiled before turning your attention back to the tv.

Harry smiled and nodded, all the anxiety he originally had was gone. He seemed more confident as he settled into the couch with you. “Im gonna kill this monologue. I’m going to be the best host.”

“Yes you are.” you smiled brushing his hair back from his face. “If the music thing ends up failing at least you have comedy.” Harry laughed shaking his head and watched tv.

“Im just glad I have you here through it all. I love you.”

“I love you too. Now shhhh its about time for the rose ceremony.”

---

Got this request. Hope you enjoy!

xoxo

#harry syles #Harry Styles #harrystyles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles imagine #harry styles imagines #harry styles snl #one direction #directioners #one direction fanfiction #one direction imagines

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groovybaybee · 4 years

Text

Greener - IV

I, II, III

(4k)

cw: mentions of abuse (nothing too intense but better safe than sorry), alcohol consumption

I am in the ocean. The water is warm and comforting as it hugs up against me with each gentle wave. It is calm and peaceful and in turn I am calm. I am in the ocean and I am calm.

You’re in your kitchen.

“Fuck off,” I whisper, eyes squeezed tightly shut as if they could shield me from the reality of the voice in my head.

I am in the ocean.

BUZZ

I ignore it.

I am in—

BUZZ

With a deep exhale, I open my eyes and face the brutal reality that the unkind voice lingering in my brain had been right. I am in my kitchen. The bright smiling faces tacked to the walls seem to mock me as I desperately try to regulate the rise and fall of my chest. My lungs unaware that I am not in the middle of a hundred-metre sprint and can probably relax a little.

Against my better judgment, I pick up the phone that had caused me to spiral in the first place. Quickly, I close Twitter, wishing I had never let myself fall down the thread of comments. I had known it would only cause me to panic but, almost masochistically, I did it anyway.

Thought I was supposed to be the one organising collaborations with big artists?? Nice work kiddo. Response to the video is pretty good so I can look into booking some studio sessions…

My focus falls away from my manager’s message. Of course, he saw this as a positive thing. It is a positive thing, really. Only a crazy person would find discomfort in their dream career being boosted along. This is the kind of thing I have always wanted. I want to make music. I want to have people see me and connect with me. But now that the opportunity is there all that I feel is fear.

You always were ungrateful.

For once, I do not try to argue with the bad part of my brain. I am ungrateful. How could someone get what they want and find reasons to still be the victim? I do not deserve any of this. How could I, in the sea of so many, be lucky enough to find traction in this industry? Yet all I want to do is run.

It is not even as though all of the new feedback is negative. To a degree, it would be understandable to want to run away were that the case. No, people were actually incredibly supportive of Harry and I’s impromptu duet. Complimentary even. I should be jumping for joy, but instead I find myself clutching for the countertop beneath me to tether me to the Earth.

Instinctively, I reach for my phone again, quickly dialling the first number I can think to.

“Hello lovely lady,” Lucy answers brightly.

“Luce,” I gasp, mouth remaining open but unable to find the words as my throat seems to tighten up.

“What’s wrong?” she asks, suddenly serious and I can picture her sat bolt upright. When I can’t formulate a reply, she speaks for me, “Are you at home? I’ll come over.”

“Yeah.” I manage to breathe out.

Time seems to warp as I listen to the background noise of Lucy buckling herself into her car and taking the short trip to my house. Only when I hear her set of keys in the lock do I hang up the call, something about her presence comforting me even through the phone.

“Let’s sit down, yeah?” Lucy says when she sees my face, undoubtedly wide-eyed as gravely breathes pass quickly between my lips.

She places a hand on my back and eases me away from the counter until my body meets the soft embrace of the sofa.

“Count to ten with me?”

Her voice is gentle and reassuring as she watches me, no doubt assessing how severe my state is and which battleplan she needs to access in order to help me calm down.

When I nod, she waits for me to utter a shaky and broken, “One,” before repeating it and moving from the sofa.

“Two,” she encourages.

She opens a window and moves back to the kitchen, returning with a glass of water as I reach “Four.”

We count together until we reach ten. Not unlike the other times we have done this, she waits for a moment as she observes if I need to start again, or if I am suitably calm enough for her to move on to the next step in her care plan. Deciding on the latter, she passes me the glass of water.

Gratefully, I take a slow sip.

“Want to talk or want distracting?”

“I feel…” I start quietly, uncertain as a sigh passes my lips, “I feel ungrateful and a bit overwhelmed.”

Lucy just nods. No judgment in her gaze as she digests my words. They dissipate into the air of the living room, sinking into the furniture and slipping under the tape of the unopened moving box in the corner.

“Is this about the video? Because if it is I’m so sorry for posting it, I just thought you two sounded so good and fit so great together and maybe you’d get a bit more recognition which you deserve completely and—”

“Lu,” I sigh with a small smile as she rambles apologetically. I pull her into a hug which neither of us expect. “I love you so much. You always know what’s right and you go out and do it. I’m just a bit batshit at the minute and can’t accept the good in things.”

“I love you.” Lucy mutters into my hair.

We sit for a while, arms wrapped tightly around one another, swaying slightly. Neither of us want to be the first to move, simultaneously needing to provide comfort and bathe in it. A smile fixes itself on my lips, one Lucy has always been capable of coaxing from me, even during my worst nights. But that is exactly the reason the smile carves its way on to my cheeks; it’s us. It has always been Lucy and me and it will be Lucy and me until our arms can’t hug and our lungs can’t laugh.

“I think,” I say softly, resentfully pulling away from our embrace, “it’s time to go through his stuff.”

Lucy nods, eyes a little watery. She sniffles once and that is enough to settle her.

“Shall I get wine?”

I cannot help the small bubble of laughter that bursts between my lips, but I nod, nonetheless. We move to set about our own tasks; Lucy gets a bottle of Shiraz and pours two glasses as I pull the, ever so slightly dusty, cardboard box into the centre of the room and peel away the tape sealing it.

I wait for her to return before opening the flaps, needing her next to me more than I could ever admit. Not that I would have to. She gives me a reassuring squeeze on the arm when she notices my sharp intake of air.

No going back. I force myself to believe that and open the box.

Peering into the box, it is less full than I remember, and that in itself pushes me along. On the top, lay a few t-shirts he did not come to collect. I place them in a pile on the living room floor, mentally noting it as one to donate. Beneath the shirts are a collection of photographs, some loose and some framed. Lucy stills beside me, nervously awaiting my tears. They would not come just yet. I remember placing the most upsetting things at the bottom. My heart clenches at the thought of seeing them again, but I push ahead.

I flick through the photographs, placing the newly empty frames to the other side of the box. It is not nearly as saddening as I had expected. Being able to pass over a timeline of our relationship is almost cathartic, knowing that I do not have to wait weeks and months between these happy memories captured in film.

“I loved that jacket.” Lucy says softly as we peer at a picture of my ex-boyfriend and I at the beach one night.

“So did I,” I smile, fingers running lightly over the glossy image, a bright red faux leather jacket which matched my painted smile. “Will didn’t.”

Lucy’s body slumps beside me and I feel the angry starting to stir inside of her. I put the stack of photos on the floor, deciding not to keep any, and peak back into the box. I can hardly help the laugh that rises from my chest when I see the next item. Not from joy, but from its sheer ridiculousness. My hands reach into the cardboard and pull from it a bathroom scale.

“You know,” I start, sadness and amusement mingling in my chest, “he fixed these, so I was always ten pounds heavier.”

Unable to see the dark humour that I do, Lucy’s eyebrows knit together furiously, teeth biting hard on the inside of her cheek to keep her from screaming obscenities.

I place the scale down on the ground before reaching in to retrieve the last item in the box. The second my fingertips touch the tape, the smile erases from my face.

Deep breath in.

Lifting the final photograph from the box, my heart breaks yet again. The memories from that night flush my mind, my whole body quickly covering in goosebumps in an attempt at defence.

Lucy is silent next to me, waiting for me to say something or react at all. I bring the image closer, throat drying a little more with each inch it nears. I gulp harshly, desperate for some of the moisture collecting at my eyes to travel to my mouth.

I stare down at the picture of myself in my parents’ garden, mum and dad on either side of me, the three of us beaming uncontrollably. We were happy and excited, I was moving to Los Angeles in a few weeks, completely uncertain if I would be able to make my dream into my career.

Turning the photograph over is what send tears falling.

Our sweet Violet,

Words cannot describe how proud we are of you. You are so brave it makes us question if you were adopted without us knowing. You have always been your own person and that is what makes you so very special. It is also the reason that we know you will succeed no matter what you do. You are a wonder. Go forward and show the world.

So much love,

Your biggest fans xx

The words are beautiful, so sweet and encouraging that reading them now makes me feel a fraud. Tracing my thumb over the lines of tape holding the fragments of the photo together, a gentle sob erupts from inside me. The torn object makes my heart ache enough to think it were trying to mirror it.

“This was the day I left him,” I manage to force out between sniffs and sobs. “When he ripped this… I couldn’t do it anymore.”

Reliving my breaking point is something I often find myself doing, experiencing the extreme high of my first ever headlining show, and subsequent extreme low when Will pointed out how unflattering the stage lights were. He took that night from me, stole its joy and tried to grind me back down to a level beneath him.

I cry hard into Lucy’s shoulder, not caring right now that I was ruining her t-shirt. She does not seem to care either, instead just rubbing my back soothingly and letting me get out the emotions I have kept locked away for so long.

It is only when I feel Lucy’s body shaking against mine that I pull myself away. My tears stop the second I see hers falling.

“I’m so sorry.” She gets out, eyes bloodshot as deep but silent sobs wrack her body.

“It’s okay.” I coo, hating seeing my best friend cry more than any object in that box.

“It’s not. I’m supposed to protect you and I didn’t see what he was doing to you.” She is starting to hyperventilate as the tears fall faster and heavier now.

“Hey,” I whisper, placing a hand either side of her head to get her to focus on me and really listen, “No one did, not even me.” My voice cracks slightly at the admission, but it is what we both need to hear in order to forgive ourselves even the smallest amount.

Our breathing regulates, the tears start to dry, and I look back to the image with a fond memory.

“Do you remember the day we left?”

Lucy gives me a breathy and snotty but genuine laugh. “Yeah. Mum packed me about five boxes of chocolate fingers.”

“And they wouldn’t let us go through security with them so we had to stand and eat as many as we could.”

We share a laugh at the fond memory, glad to remember ourselves so sweet and naïve.

I pick up an empty frame from the floor, slipping the taped-up photograph inside and set it on the coffee table.

“I’m not letting him have any more of me.”

She nods and we sit for a moment.

“Thank you for always being next to me.” I say, a lump forming in my throat yet again, however this time, my heart swells instead of breaking.

“You and me.” She says with a soft, slightly teary smile as she extends a pinky finger for me to connect with. Of course, I do.

* * *

“He said he wants to talk when he’s back from New York.” Lucy tells me nervously as she stares down at her phone.

“Could be a good thing.” I argue, reaching out my hand to lift my nearly empty wine glass from the coffee table. I bring it to my lips carefully, my laying position on the sofa not aiding my slightly messy actions.

“I don’t know, he got funny the other day when I left his place.” Lucy mutters, gulping at her newly replenished glass.

“Luce, I’m going to be completely honest with you.” I say, sitting upright and trying to avoid the urge to hiccup as I move. “I think he likes you, and I think you like him too… and I think that scares you a bit.”

Lucy pauses, chewing on my words before responding with a sigh, “I think you’re right.”

“When aren’t I?” I tease, earning an eye roll, “Seriously though, Joseph is great, and he would take care of you.”

“That’s scary.” Lucy whispers to herself more than me, “What do I do if I’m not the one looking after people?”

“You’ll always have to look after me.” I joke, squeezing her knee lightly.

“That’s what I got Harry for.” She teases, unknowingly making my stomach squeeze just at the mention of him. “What?” she laughs, noticing my sudden silence.

I tell her everything. Running her through every moment with Harry, from our first date excitement, to accidentally on purpose friend-zoning him, to breaking the surface on my past relationship. As I describe each of our encounters, I recognise the lightness in my chest when I speak his name. Each small interaction I recall seems to stoke the embers in my chest, burning hot and steadily as I catch her up.

“I think you like him but you’re afraid.” Lucy repeats my own advice back to me with a smug smirk.

“Wouldn’t you be?” I defend.

“Oh definitely, but if you like him why are you waiting around. Be brave.” Her voice is so calm and matter of fact that her words seem nothing but logical, all my excuses flying out the window as I let her advice sink in.

Except for one.

“I don’t think he likes me like that, maybe he did at the start… but not anymore.”

“You can’t know that unless you ask him.” She replies, again as if it’s the most blatant thing in the world. Which I suppose it is.

Maybe I should be brave. I look to the newly framed photograph and find my answer. Maybe I will be.

* * *

Lucy made me text Harry that night before she left. He replied before I had finished locking the front door.

Yesss are you free Friday? I potentially have an idea – Harry

Before I know it, I find myself in the car park of The Forum in Inglewood, Harry’s hand slipped effortlessly into mine as he guides us through backdoor after backdoor.

Adrenaline courses through me as we wind through corridors, hearing the support act through the overhead speakers. We had already missed part of the show and were desperately trying to make up for the time lost sat in traffic.

Harry takes care of everything, shaking hands with everyone we interact with and thanking them graciously when they help us locate our seats. I watch him, slightly awe-struck, as we make our way to our little section by the balcony. The space is more private than general seating and I wonder what strings Harry had to pull to get such incredible last-minute tickets.

“Comfortable?” Harry asks as we get settled.

I nod, afraid that if my mouth were to open, I would let everything slip. Who could blame me though? The kindness and sincerity behind his eyes are enough to make anyone swoon.

No time to dwell on the way his eyes glide across my face, the crowd roars, almost making me jump as they drag me from my daydream.

Up on stage, Fleetwood Mac take their positions. A kick drum meets with the first few notes of The Chain, sending thousands of screaming fans into overdrive, ecstatic to see their idols in the flesh. Harry and I easily fall into that category, excitedly squeezing the other’s hand as the song builds.

“Oh my God!” I scream, head thrown back momentarily, unable to contain my wonderment at whatever cosmic coincidence allowed this to by my life.

It is loud. I feel the drums rattle in my chest, bass swirling in the pit in my stomach. My free hand grips the bar of the balcony, desperately trying to tether me to reality before I float away into whatever heavenly dream I have fallen into.

The show goes on, each passing song appearing to be a fan favourite as the crowd only grows wilder and more liberated. I watch with glee as each and every person moves freely, dancing and singing excitedly as Second Hand News transitions into Say You Love Me.

My gaze flits back to Harry for the hundredth time since the show began, admiring the joy radiating from him. It is infectious and feeds me until my rays begin to pour out of me as well.

Harry is goodness. Any other day, I would have used this as a reason to drive a wedge between us. He brought happiness while I worried that I drained it from the world.

But here, with him, I know the truth. I feel the good and the beauty in the world, and I know that I am a part of that. I do not drain him, we fill each other up.

“Harry,” I desperately call over the music.

Instantly, his eyes are on me, smile still present but quickly glancing over me to ensure my wellbeing.

“I’m sorry I friend-zoned you!” is all I can think to say. Somehow, it seems to be enough. Harry lets out a beautifully easy laugh, dimples deep-set in his cheeks as he lets go of my hand in order to wrap both arms around me.

“It’s okay.” He chuckles, quickly letting go of me and turning me towards the stage so as not to miss anything. His arms linger around me, hugging me slightly from behind, swaying us almost anxiously.

“We don’t normally do requests, but this will have to be an exception.” Stevie says, her voice light as a playful smile finds its way on to her face. “This is Skies the Limit.”

“I was going to choose Storms but didn’t want to see you sad.” Harry utters in my ear, confirming every complimentary thought I have of him.

My jaw struggles to stay closed as I watch the band play my song. Harry did this for me. My favourite, non-depressive, song is playing in front of all of these people. For me. Because of him.

His name tumbles from my lips, breathless and unbelieving that I am not existing in some kind of simulation.

I turn to look at him, gobsmacked, when I find his tentative gaze. Never have I seen him so timid, as though I might think this gesture too much. I mean, it is. There is no way on Earth someone could deserve to feel so cherished. No one could possible earn this heart-swelling sensation. No one is worthy of this level of care. But here I am. I get to be with him and being with Harry is like every birthday rolled into one. He drives me wild and keeps me calm, often managing to do both simultaneously.

For once, I do not care what anyone else thinks. All that matters is the man standing in front of me and the decision I need to make. Am I going to let this pass me by and shy away from potential happiness yet again? Or will I be brave and take a chance?

Harry watches me cautiously as my brain tries to spiral and twist itself into knots of self-doubt. But every wonderful decision I have every made required an element of risk. What would my younger self think if she saw me fumble this chance? She was always so fearless, why can’t I be?

“Remember at Lucy’s? You asked what I’d do if I wasn’t scared.” I say, palms starting to sweat as I feel the edge of the cliff approaching fast.

Harry nods.

“I didn’t tell you that if I weren’t so scared, I would let myself fall for you...”

Our eyes search the other’s face; mine desperate for any sort of reaction, his cautiously awaiting a hint of insincerity.

“Funny thing is I don’t think it will stop me.”

And like that, the cliff is far behind me and I wait in limbo for any response.

My heart wishes for Harry to scoop me up in his arms, bend me low and kiss me like a solider coming home from war. My mind worries that he will throw up over the side of the balcony from sheer disgust at the very notion. However, Harry provides neither anticipated response. Instead, a stifled smile spreads across his face.

“I know,” he grins, “Lucy told me.”

“For fuck’s sake!” I laugh incredulously, my head thrown back in despair and amusement. I should have guessed she would continue meddling. “I’m going to kill her.”

“Do you think you could wait a while to do that?” Harry asks when I finally meet his eyes again, his hands slipping up my back, pulling our bodies ever so slightly closer together.

“Why?” I sigh, half-joking.

“So I can do this.”

Each of Harry’s hands settle on either side of my head, a thumb instinctively grazing across the soft skin of my cheek. I have just enough time to register his touch before his lips come down to meet mine.

Our first kiss is fuelled with longing and ignited with hope. A new type of excitement spreads through my chest as his lips melt with mine, soft and sweet, as all fears and doubts seem to drown out with the roar of the arena. Some other time I will tell Harry about Will and how he affected me, and things will be okay, because with Harry things are okay. He makes them okay. And with heaving chests and his forehead pressed against mine, for the first time in a long time, I feel the potential for a free kind of love.

masterlist

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vlogsquadssquad · 4 years

Text

Secure 2

summary: Charlie confesses his feelings and reader has to decide if that's what she wants, or if another guy has her *attention*

a/n: i’m honestly BLOWN away at part 1′s feedback. y'all really loved it so Ive been working on this all day, I hope its everything youve been waiting for! thank you to my new followers, ive been writing for a bit for fun and no one was reading my stories but after the reaction for the last story I was so motivated to write. I have A LOT more ideas and even an idea for a part 3 with smut and maybe even reader having to tell the boy she didn't choose the bad news, who knooowwsss. send me in suggestions!

warnings: language, alluding to smut at the end.

mood board:

-- YOUR POV

my life has been the most fun lately. ive been hanging out with David and he really gets me to let loose. he's always trying to top his last video which is so fun to be a part of. even if we wait around the house all day. tonight im alone though. I told him I needed to get some writing down for the last song of my album. I want it to be about being happy with yourself and secure with who you are. that you don't need another person to define who you are. but im having trouble putting that into words that rhyme. maybe I should just see what David is up to.

- daveyy (:

hey, I know I said I was busy but my mind is too cluttered and im curious what the vlog squad is up to 😉 >

< hahaa nothing actually. im by myself at the house tonight. really boring. watching movies ive seen dozens of times.

oh no! your friends realize they were too cool for you? >

< probably lmao. what are you up to?

trying to finish this last song but I can't think straight >

hey would you wanna come over? its ok if you're too busy being alone watching 50 first dates lol >

< how'd you know? 😅 id love to. chipotle?

- end texts -

“hey, loser” I say as he walks in with our food and... is that ice cream? “wait, did you get ice cream?”

“yeah, I got your favorite flavor!” he says with a smile. my heart aches at the kind gesture. “wow your house is so nice” he sets the food on my counter as he glances around.

“thank you, im really into interior design... and nice houses” i joke as i examine the ice cream David got for me. he chuckles as he gets my food out of the bag and sets it up in my living room. I put on a movie to watch but we end up muting it and just talking instead. our conversations just seem to flow. “what's a memory that stands out to you from your childhood?” I ask him. “there's so many things,” he puts his arm around the back of my couch as we sit sideways to face each other. we finished eating forever ago. “probably just all of high school. I learned so much, from my friends and my teachers. nothing academically, obviously.” he laughs. I smile to him and run my fingers through my hair. he watches my movements and for a moment its quiet.

“I think you're really smart.” I say finally. “I love how you push me, you're always there for me, and you just come up with the best ideas. you're so creative.”

“wow. what did I do to deserve your kindness?” he asks with a slight laugh.

“I can think of a few things.” our conversation became much lighter after that. after a while we went into my home studio and he helped me write. the night was filled with jokes and endless laughing but also had serious moments too. I shared very personal details about my life. but the best thing of all was that there was no camera in sight. it was just friends being friends. no clickbait. no underlying purpose for the long stay. it was perfect.

-- next day

“hey y/n could I come over and talk?” Charlie asked over the phone.

“sure, I don't have anything planned till tonight.”

“ok be there in 20.”

“what's the sudden emergency?” I ask as he walks in the door.

“there's just something I've been wanting to confess for a really long time and i’m not sure-”

“its ok Charlie, what is it?”

“I think I'm in love with you.”

my heart dropped. Im frozen in time. I don't need a relationship right now and I sure as hell can't lose my friendship with Charlie.

“I don't know what to say...”

“say you love me too!” he moves closer to me “I know you do! you always want to be around me, have me close to you, we talk all night. I know you feel it.”

I look at him with a blank expression.

“I honestly don't. I've never thought of you that way, and I'm really enjoying being single. for once in my life I'm not letting the pressure of having someone on my arm get to me, I don't need this right now, I-”

“what..? y/n. don't do this.”

“I'm not doing anything it's just the truth.” I look to the ground as his eyes fill with tears. “I think you should go.” I say.

-- DAVIDS POV, that night

- y/n/n 😋

you're still coming to my party tonight right? >

< I wouldn't miss it! so proud of you! ❤️

tonight was my party to celebrate my new show. I haven't told the fans yet but this vlog will be my announcement. we start filming for it on Monday and I've never been more excited. its exactly what I've been dreaming of all my life.

the party started to kick off and all my friends slowly started showing up. Charlie was going to perform his unreleased song tonight and everyone was already talking about it.

“hey have you heard anything from y/n and Charlie? are they dating?” Ilya comes up and whispers to me.

“no man, I haven't heard anything. I was with y/n all night last night and I wasn't exactly begging her to give me details but we did talk for hours about random stuff and she never brought him up or texted anyone. I don't know they might not be.” I say with hope shining through the cracks of my voice.

“I can just ask Charlie?” Ilya offers. he's such a good friend when it matters.

I nod and then head to get something to drink. y/n still wasn't here and I was getting antsy.

just then I hear Natalie let someone in. I peak around the corner and see y/n. she looks drop dead gorgeous. i’ve never seen her dressed up like that. I think she saw right through me and asked if she had something on her face.

“no, no, I just have never seen you dressed like that. you look great.” I look to the floor. no way she and Charlie aren't an item. they both love music and they're both flawless people. they're a match made in heaven.

“well, thank you, cowboy.” she says in a funny southern accent. she was so weird. she came in for a hug and she smelled exactly like when I first met her. I put my hand on the small of her back and for a split second I felt her push more into me.

“so where can I get a drink?” she asked as we pulled apart.

“a drink?” I ask

“yes, i’ve had a bizarre day and I need a drink.”

Im about to ask her what she means when I hear Charlie from behind me

“hey, babe, you're late.” he says to y/n as he pulls her into a hug. she almost looks uncomfortable. “hey Charles, how are you?”

“i’m great, i’ve had several drinks and im thinking much clearly-er now”

“I can smell that” she chuckles

I hand her her favorite drink and ask her if she finished the song. after a short conversation Charlie pulls her to the couch where some other friends are doing karaoke. she's basically sitting on his lap and laughing. I grab my camera and record a little outside trying to not think about it.

-- YOUR POV

I honestly think drunk Charlie has forgotten about our conversation from earlier. which i’m relieved because sometimes I just need good ol Charlie and not this new one that was in love with me. sure he's a little touchy but we were always close like that.

“alright I promised David I would perform an unreleased song tonight. come on I want you to hear it.” he grabs my hand pulls me up. I have a gut feeling I don't want to be here for it.

David set up the mic outside and everyone found a seat. David sat next to me with camera in hand.

“alright alright” Charlie starts. “hopefully I don't forget the lyrics since i’m a little buzzed.” the audience laughed. “but this song means a lot to me, and I wrote it with someone in mind. someone who has changed my life for the better and made me a better man.”

oh god, please don't say my name

“y/n. you are everything to me. I wouldn't be able to be who I am today without you.”

everyone looks to me as the music starts. a love song. i place my head in my hands and David nudges me. “you ok?” he whispers.

“can you please get me out of here?” he nods his head and stands up. Charlie is looking down at his guitar lost in his music. I feel bad leaving but how could he not take no as an answer? I follow David out the door and my head is down in shame. he closes the patio door and turns to me. “what is going on? I thought you guys were dating?”

“oh god, not you too.” I groan. “just please I need to be anywhere but here right now. fast.”

“okay. let’s go.”

we go to his garage and he looks at me.

“you said fast!” he shrugs as he opens the passenger Ferrari door for me. I laugh with my head thrown back “true. but im going to need a jacket or blanket.”

“here, use mine.” he took off his hoodie and handed it to me. I hopped in the car and we were off.

“anywhere in mind?” he asks as we pull out of the neighborhood.

“nope,” I smile. “im kinda hungry though”

“alright,” he turns the car at the light. “then we’re gonna make this worth our while. I know an overly expensive place with great burgers.”

I laugh at him as my hair blows in the wind “yes! lets spend all your money!” I lift my arms and scream. David just laughs at me. we speed down the highways. ive never felt so free.

we finally arrive to the place and get seated.

“so do you wanna tell me why we left my party now?”

“i’m sorry by the way. I didn't mean to drag you from your party but...” I look down and pick at my napkin “Charlie confessed his feelings for me this afternoon.” David looked at me confused.

“isn't that a good thing?” he asked.

“not if I don't feel the same way.” I sigh and David looks surprised. “I was very clear about my feelings- or lack of. but he had been hitting on me all night and then the song. I know he was drunk but im really worried for my friendship with him.”

“I can't believe my ears.” he said almost laughing. “you, y/f/n, don't like the guy who seems like he was sent down from the heavens for you?”

“nope. he just isn't my type I guess, I don't know. I never really thought of him that way and I don't want to.”

“wow, no one will be up to your standards will they?” David laughs as he takes a drink.

“the right guy will be.”

perfect timing. the waitress comes over with our food. we thank her and get eating. he was right. best. burgers. ever!

I moan as I take another bite.

David looks me up and down with his cheeks full of burger and chuckles. “okay, y/n, calm down. it isn't no Charlie puth.”

I gasp and throw a fry at him playfully, laughing. “no... no it is not!” we both laugh harder. as we finish up David pays despite my best efforts and we head to my house so he can drop me off. the car ride was fun, we listened to all the hits and sang our hearts out. we got tons of funny looks, but nothing mattered. I grabbed his vlog camera he threw to the side and recorded him singing and then popped myself into frame and had the camera aimed at both of us. our hair was crazy and the night was wearing down on us but it didn't matter. we were just happy to be alive.

as we pulled into my driveway and David put the car in park, I looked to him. “you wanna walk me to my door?”

“already on it.”

he came around and opened the car door for me and walked me up to my door.

“thank you for tonight. it was like out of a movie. I really needed it.” I was talking softly now since it was the dead of the night and the only thing heard was the crickets.

“anytime, y/n.” David also said softly. he kept looking to my lips which made my heart beat faster every time. I know I said I didn't need a guy, but he just looks too good.

“and congrats on your show, I'm really proud of you.” I step closer.

“thank you, congrats on staying single another night.” he joked but had his hands gently placed on my forearm.

“its still early.” I whisper closer to his face now. I can feel his breath and he can feel mine. my heart is going a million beats a minute and the butterflies in my stomach are in a tornado.

“I can't write a song about you, but I can buy you more expensive burgers.”

I laugh leaning my head on his shoulder. “that's all a girl needs anyways.”

he laughs too but gently. I look up at him and his eyes are locked on mine. he places a hand on my cheek and then lower to my neck. I take a sharp breath in and connect our lips. his lips are soft, sweet, and gentle. I pull my arms up around his neck and deepen the kiss. I feel his hands slide down my back to just above my ass. I move my head to the side and open my mouth gently. he knows what to do and opens his mouth too. I feel his tongue dominate my mouth. he retracts and I close my mouth only to bite his bottom lip and then pull away. I let go and we put our foreheads together breathing heavily.

“I could do that again.” he says.

“wanna come inside?” I whisper, my hands now playing with his hairs at the end of his neck.

“best party ever.” he laughs and I pull him inside. I don't know what im supposed to tell Charlie. the heart wants what it wants?

#David dobrik #david dobrik fanfiction #david dobrik x reader #david dobrik vlogs #David dobrik fanfic #vlog squad #vlog squad fan fiction #David dobrik imagine #vlog squad imagine #Charlie puth #Charlie puth fanfic

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biaswreckingfics · 3 years

Note

I GOT SO MUCH TO SAYYY!! gosh pls dont find me weird okay, and these are just my personal opinions and im not hating any groups!! but my unpopular opinion is: i think kpop has become very toxic after bts and bp got famous in America. And tbh if you ask me, i wouldnt want any other kpop groups to be famous in America... i only stan exo but i think i speak for all groups when i say they are safe as they are now... of course if exo ever get even more famous i will be happy and proud for their success. But look how fame and America has changed bts and bp... not tryna hate but look theyve changed, idk if anyone else noticed but after fame hits bts, i realised how theyve start to become very...white?? like they are so westernised and like example, they start focusing on America only, they even curse (not a lot but i’d still point out) casually like for example, jungkook singing a curse word in his cover song for jason derulo savage love i think (speaking of cursing, after nct127 got famous in usa mark started getting influenced by them too and he casually cursed like “oh fuck” and everyones like 😃😆) even i curse and im not saying cursing is BADD but yeah i am, and how they sing a whole song in english, not to even mention how toxic america is but in grammys they have sold tons of albums yet they didnt win anything but when they release an english song, they won.

Some half of them americans are very toxic, racist, and just theyre basically acid, like bruh, its evident that once bts got famous there are soooo much hate thrown towards bts too cuz theyre asians, or how some would say theyre gay or look like girls...if my favs (exo) ever get these kinds of treatments (not that they dint but veryy little cuz thank god they ain exposed to the western culture) i will B R E A K, i could never handle that so i would never want that to happen to them. Also noticed how, after bts got famous, most armys are equally as toxic, whether they are just stanning bts just cuz theyre famous there, or like how their fans dont even know anything abt bts and coming after so many groups and their fans. Most of them are fake and i think its cuz of the fame for bts lmao. One thing i’d like to say too tho, is how they are so overrated and their songs are played all the damn time, people would randomly talk abt them, like everywhere you go THEY ARE JUST THERE, like in my opinion if i am an army, i would just feel like they are so common and theres nothing special about them anymore and theres no excitement, like what even is the point anymore. idk if anyone gets me but thats just how i feel about my favs being “wOrLdWiDe fAmOuS”, i will love them and their music but its just something i think about tbh🤷🏻‍♀️ like let me listen to them on my own and vibe and love them, dont play it 24/7 just cuz they are famous and ure tryna get people’s attention, like imagine ure in the subway and u hear ur favs song cuz its EVERYWHERE and ure there like 😐😐 not that u dont love their music but its cuz horrible people dont deserves to listen to their songs, and like people arent going to appreciate them anyway so yeah i feel uncomfortable listening to my favs as others dont even bother, like imagine if that subway is filled with people who are in ur fandom, yall would just hv the best time in the world and VIBE, if not what even is the point. Idk if im explaining it properly, but its badically like, u feeling UNCOMFORTABLE or should i even say SELFISH cuz u do not want to be sharing ur favs with people who dont even deserve to KNOW about them. Basically like seeing how someone you HATE or bullied you back then talking and being all friendly fake with ur BESTEST FRIEND or even boyfriend/girlfriend, cuz u just want to protect them from EVIL (im so dramatic)

And well lastly, no Bts did not paved the way, or “bts is the best and only group” like no, so many amazing artists were breaking records way before bts was even a thing (no hate to bts) but they really need to get slap for having that mindset, they really make a bad image for bts...tbh kpop before was so peaceful (a little toxic but still, compared to now...BYE) and everything was just about idols and fans love, listening and supporting and loving their music and just so comforting... urgh anyway thats all i wanna say and here are some texts i saved relating to kpop groups going famous worldwide uwu

these are also examples, and honestly speaking here, i dont want to be specific as in “exo” cuz i think this happens for ALL the groups out there and the love and relationship between the idols and their fans (family) are just beautiful, but for bts and armys... tbh i feel bad because i just dont see or feel any love they hv for each other (sure we see bts saying i love you armys or armys supporting bts but with all the toxicity in their way, theres just no spark or chemistry or bond no more it’s basically like one direction and their fans and thats all they are, celebrity-fan, but for kpop its family), i can see other groups and their fans interacting or how idols would light up talking abt their fans, but for bts, theres just soooo much mess going on in their fandom its not special anymore, they lost the deep meaning of their group love and IDK HOW TO EXPLAIN IT but YEAH DJSHSKSJ OH and to add somethign else, they got famous in America, look at all the collabs🤡🤡 blackpink with cardi b, bts with nicki etc... not that collabs arent fun... im just saying these american artists... they dont exactly have a good reputation (americans singing about sex (not the good kind), money, girls and drugs) 🥴🥴 dont influenced my faves and let them be exposed to the toxic culture YALL GET ME?? KPOP HAS THE LETTER K FOR A REASON😭😭😭 let them be their own shining star, not everything has to be involved or a part of aMeRiCa to be amazing.... PHEW IVE SAID IT NOW BEFORE ANYONE GETS MAD AT ME, I DONT MEAN TO SOUND RUDE TO YOU, if youre an american and youre no where near being toxic, I LOVE YOU but im just saying, the western culture is toxic and im just saying what ive been observing and noticing🙇🏻‍♀️🙇🏻‍♀️ ps: i still love exo till the max and everything about them is perfect and theyre just amazing people (everything i said that bts and armys dont really have anymore, i think thankfully, EXO (sorry im biased) most fandoms still have so much of the L O V E there and i find that extraordinary) and he fandom is so comforting and amazing and idk dkdjjdjss thats why i dont want them getting famous worldwide...sorry exols ANYWAY THATS ALL FOR MY RANT ITS 4AM AND I AM THINKING OF DELETING THIS💀💀💀 anywya sorry for taking up so much space but i just wanna say I FREKAING LOVE NO EXIT, NO LIMITS, basically all ur exo fics cuz why not🥺🥺 i think ur writing skills are amazing as well as the plots and all especially forsaken, and THANK YOU for two bbhxoc fics😭😭😭 i cant!!! also if u reached here idk i-🥲 i hope u didnt get mad or offended 👀

Reply under the cut!!

Kpop has become extremely toxic with the growth of international fans and the rise of 3rd/4th gen. I wasn't around to experience the previous generations, but I know damn well they weren't a mess like these newer ones are.

Gaining fame in America does seem to change idols, and idk why. The group members change and the music changes also. While I do enjoy hearing idols swear (guilty pleasure) and I am an American so I get to enjoy their English songs, I can see how it makes all the other cultures/countries feel some type of way.

I will say this, though, the Grammys are shit and I dont get why people care so much about them. They've proven time and time again the awards don't go to the best artists. However, this doesn't mean that I think BTS deserved a Grammy imo.

Americans are a very toxic and hate filled bunch (again, I am one, so I get to see this shit every day). I 100% know that some of the hate directed towards Asians is because of racism (as seen by the insane uptick in crime against Asian Americans right now) and because some see kpop male idols as too feminine.

BTS is literally everywhere, which is one of the reasons I stopped listening to them tbh. They'd be in commercials, on talk shows, late night shows, in magazines, on the radio, just everywhere. It took the joy out of watching anything from them just because they were always in my face, so I can see what you mean.

I feel like the relationship between BTS and army has changed (from an outsiders perspective). Its no longer about loving and supporting your group and being happy for them. Now, its "so-so wants this? We MUST do everything in our power and spam every possible thing ever so they get what they want". Its almost frightening. They also no longer care about the quality of the music being put out. Doesn't matter what it is, they stream the ever loving shit out of it and make it break records when, honestly, it doesn't deserve to (again imo).

Lastly, I didnt get mad or offended haha. I understand a lot of these viewpoints, and thank you so much for liking my work!! I do wonder what would happen if I made a true BBH centric fic and not just spin offs or continuations of previous works where oc ends up with BBH 🤔🤔 I think that fic would have too much power haha.

#unpopular kpop opinions #sehunsthetics

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drariellevalentine · 4 years

Text

Medically Inevitable

Chapter 1- Frivolous First Days

Characters:- Arielle Valentine, Ethan Ramsey, Jackie Varma, Sienna Trinh

Pairing:- Ethan Ramsey x Arielle Valentine

Warnings:- PTSD

Arielle’s PoV:-

Edenbrook Hospital. Finally! My very first day of my internal medicine residency at Edenbrook. One more step, a rather huge one, towards my goal.

General PoV:-

Arielle adores the hospital from standing outside, with a proud smile on her face. She's halfway there, to be her own person, and also halfway to mend the relationship that shouldn't have been strained in the first place, but yet, she had to destroy it. She takes a deep breath. Now, she can only hope for her godfather to forgive her.

With one more look, she enters the huge hospital to find the reception desk straight ahead of her. ID cards- she needs to collect her ID before doing anything else.

A bright, chirpy doctor, smiling at everyone who's passing her, is the first thing or to be more accurate the first person to grab Arielle's attention nearing the nurses' desk. “Hey!” New intern, right?" The doctor gives her a bright smile which Arielle returns. "I'm Dr. Delarosa but you can call me Ines," she continues, her cheerful voice flowing with excitement.

"Let me help you with your badge. What's your name?" She asks smiling.

"Arielle Valentine, " I reply.

"Valentine...Valentine..." She mutters while rummaging through the bundle of ID's and then the badges. And then smiles brightly when she finds both," Ah! Here you go Dr. Valentine."

Before taking her badge, for a moment, Arielle wonders how much Ines’s cheeks must hurt at the end of the day for smiling this much. But then Aria herself smiles.

"Thank you," she smiles at Ines before her gaze flickers back to the badge.

Dr. Valentine, it says. She remembers how her father said she wouldn’t be able to make it. He never believed in her, that she could be successful in the field she wants. But now she is going to be a doctor. She did it. And her heart fills with pride. She's never been this proud of herself before. "Thank you."

As she's about to pass the waiting room, out of nowhere, an elderly woman collapses on the floor.

Arielle makes her way towards woman but before she could another doctor reaches her. He leans down to check her pulse and then looks around before his gaze stops at her. "You rookie, come here."

For a millisecond Arielle thinks of correcting him and tell her name but then decides against it, because the patient's life matters more.

She rushes to the patient's side to take a note of her vitals and tells the doctor. "Pulse is weak. She is unresponsive," Arielle says. She can feel her panic rising. But the older doctor's calm. "What was she coming for? Did she fill out a form yet?" He asks the nurse standing nearby. "No, she just walked in," the nurse replies, his features screaming tension.

"If we don't figure out what's wrong with her quickly, she'll die on this table." He says, though a bit frustrated this time. "Rookie, check her B.P." Arielle wraps a blood pressure cuff around the unconscious woman's arm, and pumps the bulb, peering at the numbers. "It's plummeting. She's hypotensive," Arielle feels panic rising more than ever. "We need to get fluid in her."

The nurses runs and gets a IV stand. As he sets the stand, Arielle checks the woman for more symptoms as does the older doctor. That's when she notices a bruise rapidly forming in her elbows. "Doctor look at the bruise. It wasn't there a moment ago," she points it out. "Are you sure?"

"Yes.", you reply. "A bruising that fast suggests the patient is hemophiliac. Good catch." He nods." Take a closer listen to her lungs."

Arielle slips the stethoscope into her ears and runs the resonator over the woman's ribs. "I can't listen anything on her left side. And her right lung is struggling," She says tensed. "Doctor she's going to suffocate." Arielle's a mess right now, tensed. But the older doctor remains collected. "Nurse we have got a code blue."

Taking a bag mask from the nurse and begins to gently pump air into the woman's lungs. He is cool and calm on the other hand Arielle's on the verge of having an panic attack. "What do we do doctor?" She asks. "Consider all the clues. It's all there. You know this, Rookie."

It hits you. “It’s a hemothorax!” "Precisely, a blood vessel ruptured and is filling her pleural cavity- ,"

"-blocking her lungs from expanding. That's why she can't breathe!" I say. " But...but we can't repair the blood vessel here."

"We'll have to do an emergency thoracotomy here to drain the cavity instead." " Nurse!" He calls and the nurse runs to them with a lung tube and a scalpel, forwarding them to Arielle. She accepts it hesitantly. The doctor pulls the woman's shirt to expose the side of her rib cage, Arielle shivers of fear.

With her hand shaking she tries to remember what she was taught. The scalpel quivers in her nervous grip. But the doctor from behind her steadies her hand. "Hey, you've got this," he whispers softly and Arielle nods trying steady her hands. "There you go, nice and easy." He says as Arielle makes a perfect incision in between the woman's ribs.

"Now the tube," He instructs.

Together, the two of them insert the chest tube and with a spurt, blood comes out draining out of her chest. She starts to breathe again.

"We...we did it!" Arielle says shocked and surprised but also happy. She's happy that she could save a live. She knew her godfather would tell her stories about saving lives but, having done it for herself, she felt exhilarated and happy.

She sees the doctor gesturing to the nurse and then instructing him what to do.

"Doctor... That was...amazing! " Arielle says happy and excited.

"Yeah, it's actually pretty amazing that you didn't get her killed." He snorts.

"Your examination was slow and not to mention superficial. You scalpel techniques-" he nods in denial," amateur at best."

"I'm sorry doctor, it's my first day."

“Well, it wouldn't have mattered to the patient’s family if she died, Dr.-" he takes her ID, "Valentine."

He gazes at it thoughtfully before piching the bridge of her nose and mumbling something. Tossing the ID back at Arielle he leaves.

"What an ass!" She exclaims angrily.

"Yeah, what an ass!" A female nurse stares at her admiringly, her eyes filled with lust, making Arielle roll her eyes.

"Don't worry. Dr. Ramsey is like this to everyone," the same male nurse from before says.

"Dr. Ramsey?! As in Dr. Ethan Ramsey?!"

"Yes. I take in you are a fan?"

"Are you kidding me? He's basically one of the reasons I wanted to be a doctor. And now you are telling me I just performed a thoracotomy with him!" Arielle says the last part a bit dramatically making the nurse laugh and walks away leaving Arielle with her thoughts alone.

She remembers meeting him a few years back, but never did she think he would act like that. She remembers him sharing his passion of medicine with everyone, and encouraging her to follow her path. Was he really the same person? Can being a doctor for 10 years really change your outlook in life that much? She's shocked!

She looks down at her clothes now having patches of blood here and there. "I need to change my outfit," she says to herself and looks around for a clock. "Shit! I'm going to be late!”, she thinks noticing the time and runs off to find the locker room. After thirty minutes of a lecture, they gets assigned to their very first case, with an intern pairing with another from the stream.

And Arielle's partner is Aurora Emery, who just happens to be ‘her boss's niece and who is not at all surprisingly, not friendly at all.

On their way to the first patient, Arielle's the one to open her mouth first, “Okay, so our first patient is in Room 532. Should we talk about how we are going to approach this case first?" “No need," she says rudely testing Arielle's patience. That Aurora Emery doesn't have the right to talk to people like this just because her aunt is the hospital chief. "Look Aurora, all I care about is the patient.” Arielle takes a breath to calm herself. " If you don't want to be nice, that's okay by me. But we're gonna put everything else aside for the people in our care."

"Suits me just fine." Her voice still cold as ice. She moves forward, keeping a few steps ahead Arielle. So much for not being egoistic.

Arielle skims through the chart for the patient’s personal details. They enter Room 532 to see the patient in there of the same age as them, not much older.

Arielle’s PoV:-

“Hi Annie! I’m Dr. Valentine and this is Dr. Emery. We’ll be your doctors today.” I nod in her direction. And Aurora smiles kindly and sweetly at the girl. Something that I didn't think she can.

" Annie, I'm going to take your vitals while Dr. Valentine asks you some questions," she says, her face still smiling.

"Before we start, is there anyone we can call for you? Being in the hospital can be a little less scary with someone by your side."

" I just moved here for grad school. My family's on the other side of the country, and I don't really know anyone yet," Annie says, her voice low.

"I just moved here too. Maybe we can look after each other." I smile brightly at her hoping to make her mood better. It works, and she returns the smile.

As Aurora checks her B.P. I ask her a few questions noticing the patches of rashes on her skin.

"Do you often suffer from itchy skin?"

"Not really. Just for the past few days."

I nod and grab her chart. " You came in here for headaches, nausea and vertigo."

"And also my plans keep cramping up."

“My palms also keep cramping up though.”

"Have you ever had these symptoms before?"

"Never. The timing sucks. I even had to cut my vacation to Indonesia short for it."

"You did the right thing. Vertigo on a unknown place can be very dangerous." Aurora says.

"Not to mention how scary it have been.

"It still is." Annie pauses for a second. "How long will I have to stay here?"

"We'll try our best to make it quick," I say confidently, and the girl relaxes a bit.

"Sorry, I panic easily when I'm stressed out."

I notice a bruise on her ankle while checking her for any other symptoms or anything else that could give me a clue.

"How did you get this cut on your ankle, Annie?"

"Oh that! I cut it on some coral while I was scuba driving."

"You are a scuba driver?"

"I'm still learning. I went to get my driver's license while I was on my trip. But I never got it though."

"Okay, last question. Are you allergic to any medication?"

"No, none that I know of."

Arielle notes everything down. "Thank you Annie, you did a nice job here." Both Arielle and Aurora smiles at her.

"Thanks. You guys are really nice. Honestly, I was hoping a old grumpy guy."

"So was I.", I laugh.

"We'll let you get some rest," Aurora says before getting out of the room following Arielle.

"Dr. Valentine. I don't think I'm ever going to get tired of hearing it."

" I on the other hand, am already bored of it," Aurora says, her friendly behavior gone again.

Sighing, I focus on the job.

" We should do a screen for any viruses or bacteria. She could have picked up something on her trip."

"Not the worst idea. We’ll run a full workup on her vitals."

And before I can say anything else, Aurora's pager goes off. It's her aunt. She's paging her to her office.

"I need to go." Her cold voice announces.

"Seriously?! " This time I can feelher anger rising. Was she really ditching her? It's our case. We should solve it together. Not me alone!

"I'll tell you what. When the chief wants to see you, I'll run the labs. Until then...”, she never finishes the sentence but leaves.

General PoV:-

Half an hour later, Sarah, a nurse at the hospital, the same one who was admiring Dr. Ramsey shamelessly, hands Arielle a lab report. Annie's lab report.

Going through the report once Arielle ask to give Annie an antibiotic, twice a day, 1200 mg in total. She tells it to Maria, another nurse, a bit elderly but nonetheless friendly and sweet.

Before lunch she decides to check on the other patient she had. A five year old child who has a hole in heart. Poor boy. Life is being unfair to him. He should have been playing and having fun but here he was stuck with his medications.

The last time she checked on him, he was all sad and gloomy, sitting on his bed alone. So this time Arielle decides to surprise him with a treat that'll make him happy.

That's what Arielle is doing now, standing in front of the vending machine. Buying four different candies, which are now resting in the pocket of her lab coat, she is standing there confused of which chocolate bar to pick as the fifth treat.

Twix... Kitkat... And an unknown chocolate bar. She guesses it to be some American snack. Her eyes runs over all the chocolate options before she sighs.

"Having trouble choosing yourself a treat, Rookie?" A cold, nonchalant voice says from behind her.

She turns around to find the same doctor with whom she performed the thoracotomy, Dr. Ramsey.

"Dr. Ramsey... It's not for me, it's for one of a patient of mine." She says. When she doesn't get any reply from him she herself continues. "He is here to treat a hole in his heart. His surgery is due tomorrow and he is really scared right now. Poor little guy, he should be enjoying playing with toys but instead stuck here. So I thought of buying him a little something that will cheer him up."

For a second, she thinks that she saw him smile but it was gone to soon to revaluate.

She turns to the vending machine again. "I was always a Geysers girl myself.” “He however”, pausing to turn back and point at the boy, “doesn't seem like a kid who'll like Geysers."

She says looking at him. She notices him staring at that chocolate bar and suddenly an idea strikes her mind. "Why don't you help me choose one, doctor? Please," she requests, way too cutely for anyone to refuse.

He sighs but yet takes a step forward towards the machine. He stands there for a minute going through the option. His eyes flickering at the chocolate bar which makes Arielle think he's going to choose it but rather he settles for a Kitkat.

When it pops out, he hands it to Arielle and walks away. With the remaining coins, Arielle quickly buys that chocolate bar.

"Dr. Ramsey...wait!" She quickens her pace to catch him and bumps into him when he suddenly stops resulting in the free fall of her charts.

She leans down to pick it up but rather the chocolates and candies falls down from her pocket.

Sighing Ethan kneels down to help her. "Jeez, Rookie, are you here to treat the kid or give him diabetes?"

Arielle gives him a incredulous look while picking her things. "It's just a few candies!"

Ethan hands her the candies he picked up and then stands. Arielle too stands up after picking her charts and then hands out the chocolate bar to Ethan, who raises his brows.

"I saw you staring at it," she starts to explain, " Seemed like you like it."

She tosses him the bar with a sweet smile, " You know it's okay to treat yourself time to time."

"And you know, you are never too old to have a chocolate," she smirks at him but Ethan is too surprised at her gesture that he barely notices it.

"Uh, thank you Dr. Valentine...I guess," he says awkwardly.

Arielle's PoV:-

Dr. Ramsey turns around and leaves. As I turn around I bump into another person. “What's with me and bumping today.”, I think. "Sorry, my bad!" I apologize to the intern with whom I bumped. "Ah, no, all mine... I'm sorry," he stammers a bit. “Hey, I saw you at the orientation. Arielle Valentine, right?” I nod.

"I'm Landry Olsen," he forwards his hand which I take. "Was that Dr. Ramsey?" He points towards the elevator. "Yes." "Wait, you’re the intern who performed the thoracotomy with him this morning. Aren't you?" He asks surprised and exited.

“Yeah, and he ripped me a new one in front of everyone," I say sadly. "It was so damn-" "Lucky!" He interrupts me in between. I bet that, well I think, being insulted in front of a whole crowd is anything but lucky. But I don't find it important to tell him.

Before I can say anything else my phone chimes with an alarm I set. "Sorry, I'll have to go. Talk to you later," I say and turn towards the stairs. “Okay, time to check on Annie, she should have taken the medication by now.”, you think to yourself. You enter her room to find Annie scrolling through her phone.

“Hey Annie.” “Hi Dr. Valentine, a nurse just gave me some medication a while back.” “Good. So, tell me more about yourself. We didn’t really have a chance to talk.”“I just moved here last week from California. I got accepted into Harvard for law.....law...sch...”

Suddenly, Annie’s heart monitor goes flat! Annie!..Annie!” You press the call button and yell Code Blue, performing chest compressions. Another intern burst into the room saying, “Room 501 just called a Code Blue before you, keep up the chest compressions. What’s the matter?”

“I don’t know, she was talking and speech started slurring. Then her heart stopped.”The tall intern pulls back Annie’s gown, revealing hives. You gasp. “She must have been allergic to the antibiotic I prescribed her!”

“We’ll have to defibrillate her ourselves; we’ll start her at 300 volts.” She takes your place of performing CPR, while you pull the cart close to the bed.

You open her gown and place the paddles after gelling their undersides, as she pauses CPR. “One below the right collarbone and one below the left armpit. Done!” You set the charge to 300 volts. “Do it!” Annie’s body spasms as you defibrillate her. “Clear!” You set them aside as she continues chest compressions. “Come on!.....Come on Annie! Come back to us!” You hear a beep, you turn towards the monitor. Annie’s heartbeat returns, accelerated but constant! “Yes!” “You are sooo lucky, Dr....”

“Arielle Valentine. I’ll maintain compressions while you push an epinephrine injection and intubate, Dr....” “Jackie Varma.”, she says while intubating. You continue with your compressions. “What the HELL is going on here, Rookie?”

You let out a short squeal in surprise. Turning to look at him, you see him leaning on the doorframe glaring at you. “Dr. Ramsey! Don’t worry, everything’s under control. My patient was allergic to the antibiotics I prescribed her.”

“At least you’re owning up to your mistake.” You see Dr. Ramsey turn to Jackie, pushing an epinephrine injection into her thigh. “Now, we intubate.” You see her lubricate the tube before slowly feeding it through her mouth.

“Good work, Dr....” “Varma. I heard Dr. Valentine calling a Code Blue, since Room 501 called one before, I decided to step in and help.”

“The patient is very lucky you were here. I’m not sure Dr. Valentine here could have handled it.” You bit your lip, your face falling. “Thank you Dr. Ramsey, although Dr. Valentine performed as well.”

He scoffs and politely tells her to go back to her patients. “And you... you need to have a long, hard think about if you are prepared to be here. This isn’t med school, this is the real world. It doesn’t matter that the patient didn’t know that she was allergic or it is your first day. Whether your patients live or die are on you.” “Yes, Dr. Ramsey.”, you bit your lip in shame so hard that you start drawing blood. Luckily, he doesn’t notice. “There are no room for mistakes or excuses. You can’t expect the patient’s family to accept the reason of”-

“Dr. Ramsey? A petite intern is standing near the door. “Wow, someone who isn’t tall! I thought everyone were basketball players here!”, you think to yourself. “Yes?”, he asks, the annoyance on his face clearly visible. “A nurse said to me that another nurse said to him that Dr. Hirata said to him that Chief Emery wants to see you.” He groans, “Interns!” He swiftly walks out and turns a corner.

“Thank God for Dr. Hirata!”, you thank the universe for this distraction. “Yeah, but too bad that Chief Emery didn’t actually need Dr. Ramsey.”, she says with a mischievous smirk. “Wait What?”

“I saw Dr. Ramsey chewing you out, just as bad as your lip, and thought that girl needs a little saving.”, she says nonchalantly. “Damn! You’ve got nerve!”, I praised her, impressed by her courage to lie to THE Dr. Ramsey. “Aww! Thanks, it was nothing. I’m Sienna or Dr. Trinh, whatever floats your boat. “I’m Arielle Valentine, and I’m also glad that not every doctor is a basketball player!” She laughs.

“Hey, a bunch of us interns are meeting up at a bar across the street, Donahue’s. You should come too, even Dr. Ramsey hangs out there.” “I’ll be there.”

“Awesome! Come to the locker room once your shift ends. I’ll be waiting. Byeee!”

General PoV:-

Arielle can’t help but think about her arguments with her father as Dr. Ramsey’s words come back to her. “And you... you need to have a long, hard think about if you are prepared to be here. This isn’t med school, this is the real world. It doesn’t matter that the patient didn’t know that she was allergic or it is your first day. Whether your patients live or die are on you.”

Arielle starts to doubt herself, whether cutting off most contact with her family and Naveen was worth it. Especially for something she isn’t good at. Her mind starts to remember her 18th birthday, specifically the huge argument that followed after her announcement of becoming a doctor, “or at least hoping to.”, she thought.

Tears start pooling in her eyes and she ducks into a nearby supply closet. She can hear her father’s words whispered in her head. “How could you do this! We’ve been talking about you and your brother taking over the family law firm someday! Why would you tell us now! Do you know how many prestigious universities and colleges are fighting to provide a full scholarship to the great Alessandro Raines’s daughter!” Tears start running down her blush tinted cheeks, smearing the eyeliner and mascara she had done in the morning. Her pager beeps after some time. She darts into the restroom and fixes her makeup and continues her shift.

Where's is the freaking elevator? She angrily mutters to herself in the quest of finding the elevator.

"Hey, are you lost too?" An intern in a wheelchair asks her. He is coming from the opposite direction of her.

"Yes," Arielle gives a sheepish smile.

"Me too."

"Trust me this place doesn't look this huge from outside." Arielle says and he giggles.

"Any idea how to get to the elevator?" He asks looking around.

"Nope. I'm looking for it too," Arielle sighs. "How does everyone else seem to already know where to go?""And what to do..." He says sadly.

"Say, are you two lost? I can show you the main hall then," and elderly patient says coming from the same direction as Elijah.

"Thanks! As long as it's not much trouble for you ma'am," Elijah smiles at her brightly.

"No trouble Dr. Taylor makes me take twelve laps of the floor every day so I don't go stir-crazy!" She smiles back. "Come with me," She says and starts to walk and the lost two interns follows her.

"Here you go. This elevator can take you on your way," she nods at the elevator which is currently resting on this floor.

"Thank you ma'am! You are a lifesaver," Elijah says.

"Really, thank you," Arielle smiles at her before getting in the elevator with Elijah.

As the elevator starts moving down, something strikes in Arielle's mind.

"Oh my God! I know what's wrong with Annie!" She says and presses the 3rd floor button.

"Wait, what's wrong? And who's Annie? " Elijah asks confused but before Arielle can reply the lifts halts to stop.

"Sorry, gotta go! I'll explain it to you later!" Arielle gets out of the lift while paging Dr. Ramsey.

Ten minutes later, he enters room 532, where Arielle is talking with Annie.

"You paged me," his cold voice rang through the room which grabbed the attention of both the woman.

"I solved the case," Arielle says happily.

"I'll be the judge of that."

"I too want to know what is wrong with me," Annie says in between them and with that Arielle starts to explain what she found out while questioning Annie occasionally, when needed.

"I'm going to write her prescription and get her medications ready," Arielle feels to Ethan once they both where outside the patient's room.

"Don't bother," Dr. Ramsey says nonchalantly, handing her a paper.

She opens it to find a medical prescription, prescribing all the medicines that she was about to order for Annie. "You knew what's wrong with her?" She asks confused and he nods.

"Then why didn't you treat her?" She asks a bit angrily this time.

"I thought to give you time till 11 o'clock to solve it."

"I- Well, thanks for giving me a chance," Arielle says calming her anger.

And he raises his brows at her, "You’re not angry?"

"Honestly, I am. But again, I'm not going to learn anything if someone is holding my hand." She answers.

"My thoughts exactly."

Just then Aurora comes there to see Arielle talking with Ethan, with a prescription in her hands. Her eyes moves to the room where Annie is staying to Annie laying happily in her bed.

"You presented the case without me." Aurora says angrily once she's beside Arielle.

And that's when Arielle remembers that she had a partner. "I'm doomed," she thinks to herself before she hears Ramsey scolding Aurora.

"Where where you and what where you doing when Dr. Valentine was solving the case here alone?"

Pinching the bridge of his nose he continues, "This assignments aren't optional..."

He keeps lashing out at Dr.Emery so Arielle decides to help her out.

"Sorry, Dr. Emery, I should have kept you updated on the case," She interrupts Ethan who angrily mutters something under his breathe.

Aurora at first glares at her angrily but after understanding Arielle is giving her an out she speaks," It's okay. I wasn't there. So it is your win."

Ethan turns to Arielle this time. "Dr. Valentine, this hospital runs on communication. Keep each other apprised."

He says before walking out to the other direction.

Your shift soon grinds to an end. You head to the locker room.

"Get ready!!" Sienna exclaims excited as soon as Arielle enters into their locker room."Woah! Calm down, girl!," Arielle smiles brightly at her. "Did you bring something to wear?" She asks and Arielle turns around from her locker with a cowl neck backless maroon top and a pair of black skinny jeans. " What do you think?" She shows it to Sienna."You'll look beautiful in it. Go and put it on! I want to see you in it!" She literally pusher Arielle into the changing stalls.

Within minutes Arielle gets out of the stall. “How do I look?""You look gorgeous," she compliments her. If anyone else said this Arielle wouldn't have believed it but Sienna's compliment felt genuine to her. "Is anyone else going to join us?" Arielle asks as they exit the hospital building. "Yes, they are already in the bar waiting for us," she says, her excitement never decreasing. It takes them five minutes to walk to the bar from the hospital.

"Hi, guys!" Sienna greets as soon as they reach a table. There are three more interns there. Arielle saw them at the orientation, they are internal medicine residents, same as her. Also, two of them are Landry and Jackie, she already met them."This is Arielle," she introduces Arielle to everyone. "Hi!" Arielle waves at everyone before taking a seat beside Jackie and Sienna sits beside Elijah and next to him is Landry. Soon a waiter brings a tray full of shots to their table and they bond over it.

Hours after, Arielle feels a pair of eyes looking at her. She looks around to find a pair of turquoise blue eyes locked on hers. "I'll buy us the next round," Arielle says and get up before anyone else can say anything. "Anything wrong Dr.Ramsey?" She asks when she's nears him at the bar. "No, I-" he pauses."I was just looking how different you look in the outer world." Just then the bartender interrupts to ask if Arielle needs something. "A round of shots and," she looks at Ethan's glass trying to figure out what he is drinking," two scotches,neat." She smiles at the bartender. The bartender comes back either her orders and she passes one of the glasses bearing the scotch to Ethan. "Why neat instead of on the rocks?" He asks accepting the drink. "Because ice changes the flavor."

"Correct," he says impressed. " You know you can't bribe me into favoring you, right?" He nods at the drink. "It's just a thank you drink," she replies.” “Thank you, for what?" " For giving me another chance."

Ethan’s PoV:-

As she talks about some patient, he can't help but study her face. It feels like I know her, I've seen her somewhere before. Her soft diamond face, blushing cheeks. Her long jet black hair, the end of which is ombréd with violet, the same violet as her eyes- everything about her seems too familiar. I can't help but look at how pretty she is looking right now. Her hair covering half of her face and those bright violet eyes peeking from beneath it those beautiful long lashes. Get a hold on your thoughts, Ramsey! She's your intern for god’s sake!

"Anything for you, Ethan?" Reggie asks after bringing Arielle her tray of shots. "Two specials, Reggie." "Only for you Ethan." "You are on first name basis with the bartender?" She asks me after Reggie is gone. “I come here everyday since my intern year. So I know him for a long time," I answer. "You don't have anyone waiting at home?"

I hesitate for a moment but then decide to change the topic by answering. “I'll come here even when I do. I need some buffer between hospital and the world. An air lock." "Don't take your job home, Valentine." "I'll keep that in mind. But you still didn't answer my question." She says. She's not one to forget. I sigh. “No, no one's waiting for me at home tonight." Thanks to Reggie for saving me from any further questions from her, if she has any.

After Reggie places our drinks I hand one to her.

"Try it."

She looks at it for a moment, probably deciding whether or not to drink.

"It's great! Better than any other drink I've had," she says slightly surprised making me smirk.

“Either you are sucking up to me or you have an excellent taste as an intern." I smirk.

"I'd like to think it's the second one." She grins and then turns around to find her friends.

"I think I should go. My friends are waiting for me. Good night, Dr. Ramsey.” She says and I nod.

Arielle’s PoV:-

After two hours, and three more rounds of shots, the group makes their way out.

"We'll have to be back here after four more hours only," Arielle says checking the time on her phone.

"The apartment I share with my boyfriend is on the other side of the town. I will barely be able to sleep for two hours," Sienna says sadly.

"I'd be damned to sleep for two hours. The apartment I stay in is above a salsa club," Jackie sighs.

"The apartment I rented doesn't have a lift, so I had to settle with the smallest one-bed room apartment on the ground floor. There's hardly any space there," Elijah says.

"Guys!" Sienna grabs their attention. "Maybe I am saying this because I'm drunk. But what if the five of us rents an apartment together?" She suggests.

"Renting an decent apartment alone in Boston may be quite expensive. But if we five split it among us, the price won't be much more than we are already paying for our hellholes." Jackie nods in support.

"That's probably a good idea." Landry supports her too.

As the group starts discussing about it, Arielle looks at them thoughtfully.

She never thought of moving in with people she’ve known for only a day, but fate seems to have different plans for her.

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ubdq-multiverse · 3 years

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Roland/Voice Lines

Hello... Roland. What’s it to you? Good morning... Glad to see you’re still here. What do you want? Good afternoon... I’m a bit busy. Could we talk later? Good evening... I’m heading to the Angel’s Share. See you there? Good night... I should head out. It was good seeing you.

Chat - Drinking. Oh, none for me, thanks. I’d rather a juice. Chat - Knights of Favonius. Did you know my sister’s an Outrider for the Knights? She works really hard, I’m proud of her. Chat - Adventures. I’ve already got plenty of commissions. If you’ve got another, talk to Katheryne and I’ll look into it later. I’m only one man.

When it rains - Outside. Ah. Shame I have to work outside... Oh well, I better get a cloak. When it rains - Resting. There’s nothing better than sitting next to the window, watching the rain and hearing the noise of it against the roof... *sigh*... Oh, I’m sorry, what were you saying? When it snows... Ugh. I’m not dressed for this... glad I have a pyro vision at least. When the wind is blowing... I’d rather it didn’t... Hope it doesn’t impede my journey. When the sun’s out... Such a fine day... Do you want to bask in the sun? Oh, right. Let’s get back to work.

About Roland... You want to know more about me? I’m not exactly the most exciting person... Thanks. About us - Betrayal. I have your back so long you have mine, alright? Don’t stab me in the back. About us - Motive. Be honest, what’re you doing? Like, why me? I mean, I’m grateful, but I’ve been here before. There’s always some ulterior motive.

About the Vision... Don’t ask. It’s... it’s not an easy story. Not everyone has a happy, heroic story, y’know. Sometimes it brings up memories we want to forget... Try again when I’m more intoxicated, you might get more from me then. Anything to share... Sometimes, when I get enough of a break, I’ll climb the cliffs near The Stone Gate and just look out on the Liyue landscape, wondering what it’s like to be able to travel Teyvat. You’re lucky, you know that? Interesting things... Look, an eagle! I wonder what it must be like up there, so free and unconcerned... *sigh*... Oh, right. We should get going.

About Amber... She can be a handful, but she’s not bad. A bit too energetic for my taste, but she’s a good ally. Don’t let her outbursts worry you. She’s just like that. About Jasmin... I’m glad to be her older brother. She’s worked hard to get where she is, and doesn’t even let her success get to her head. If I ever need her, she’s always there, and vice versa. Just don’t ask her personal questions, she bites. About Kaeya... Oh, he gets on my nerves. He acts so suave but he doesn’t know how to actually be intimate with someone if it would save his life. Maybe I’m just overly judgmental, but he grinds my nerves. I’m glad I’m not part of the Knights, just so I don’t have to interact with him. About Jean... *sigh*... I worry about her. If she keeps working herself at the pace she is, she’s bound to fall ill. Can I trust you to keep an eye on her, Honorary Knight? About Diluc... What’s it to you?... Oh, sorry. I’m just constantly asked about him. He’s trustworthy, albeit cold at first. He’s a big softie, though, he just shows his kindness in different ways... what? How dare you ask about my affections! I’m not talking any further, ask him yourself! About Barbara... She’s something, that’s for sure. I appreciate the work she does, I really do, it’s just... all her idol business kind of grinds my nerves. It’s not my thing, but I respect her for what she does. Just don’t expect me to go to one of her concerts with you. About Lisa... She’s... overbearing. I think you know what I mean. I try not to visit the library because of it. Could you pick me up a book? About Bennett... I feel bad for him. I try and help him when I can, I’m just usually too busy with my own commissions. You understand, right? About Fischl... She’s... strange. She seems very full of herself, but I think there’s something else going on there. Unfortunately, I don’t have the patience for that... if you find out, could you let me know? I don’t want to shun her without good reason, you know? About Noelle... Oh she’s a saving grace. I personally haven’t interacted with her much, but I always hear stories. She’s a sweetheart. If you get to know her, would you mind discussing it with me? About Sucrose... I don’t get to see her much, sadly. I’d love to get to know her better, we’re just in vastly different circles. She seems like someone you’d wanna protect, you know? Oh... probably just me then. About Mona... She’s a strange one, but the subject she studies is fascinating. I’ve worked with her a few times, but she doesn’t exactly explain her processes well. Perhaps you’d understand more than I?

More about Roland - I. I keep telling you, I’m not very interesting. You’d have better luck talking to... basically anyone else. More about Roland - II. I hope Mom’s doing alright. I haven’t been able to check up on her in a while. Do you mind going with me? More about Roland - III. One day, I hope to be as famous as all those heroes Jean and Amber talk about. I know I’ve got a long way to go, but it’s good to have ambition, right? More about Roland - IV. I don’t want to push people away, it’s just easier. I’ve been alone for a long time, it just feels familiar. Though, I suppose trusting people isn’t so bad, either. More about Roland - V. You’re the third person, I think, that’s really had faith in me. I hope you’ll be more like the second, rather than the first. I enjoy your company... F-forget it, forget I said anything!

Roland’s hobbies... Do you know where my journal went? I’ve got another idea and I want to write it down. No, not that one, the other one. The other one. Roland’s troubles... Have you talked to Diluc yet? What’d he say? Oh... that’s great. Thanks for letting me know. No, there wasn’t anything in particular... hey, what’s that? Favorite food... I’ll never forget the Black-Back Perch Stew I had a few years ago... do you think you could make it? Least favorite food... I’m not a fan of most alcohol. In fact, as long as alcohol tastes like alcohol, I’ll avoid it like the plague. Don’t question why I’m always in the Angel’s Share, it’s none of your business! Birthday... Hey, happy birthday, by the way. I understand it’s probably a bit weird for you, with your twin still missing... When you find them, let me know, I’ll prepare the belated birthday party.

Feelings about Ascension - Intro. Wow. Do you feel that power too? Feelings about Ascension - Building Up. I’ve never felt this strong before. Is this what you guys always feel? Feelings about Ascension - Climax. My work is paying off, thanks to you. Let’s not stop now, let’s keep going.

#genshin impact oc #genshin impact #oc #pyro!oc #roland!au #roland headcanon #oc voicelines #oc voice over

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weartirondad · 4 years

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Chaos, Yet Harmony

Summary: 3 times Peter made Tony watch Star Wars and the 1 time it was Tony's idea.Or: Peter Parker is unapologetically a geek and Tony quickly realizes that there's nothing he wouldn't do for him.

A/N: this is part of the @irondadsecretsanta and is my gift for @aslanscompass. It was a ton of fun & I wish you all a wonderful Christmas <3

Check out all the other AMAZING fics HERE !

FF.net I ao3

Tony was wary when he answered the call at 10 past eleven at night.

He had learned early on that late night calls from teenage vigilantes were never a good sign and that, really, a call at any time from a teenager was a rarity and should always raise a red flag. So, yeah, he was wary but he felt like he was entitled to.

Next to him his fiancée was curled around the dark green plush blanket like a cat and regarded him, staring at the lit up screen of his phone, in amusement. “Don’t yell too much.”

He rolled his eyes and accepted the call, “No promises.”

“Mr. Stark?” came the breathless voice of none other than Peter Parker through the speakers and already he could feel his blood pressure rise and tried to breathe out deliberately slowly.

Calm, Stark, you’re calm.

“The one and only,” he answered and was almost proud of how calm and collected he sounded. Oh how deceiving voices could be.

“Oh!” The kid sounded actually surprised and paused for a second in which Tony could only hear the telling thwip thwip thwip of hectic webbing.

Not the best sign but he was calm. So very calm.

He was also already on the way to the nearest window, two steps from calling a suit. Pepper behind him was now openly laughing but he didn’t look back because –

“Great! I might need a little help here. Something.” Thwip. “Something came up.” Thwip. “Sorta.”

“Sorta?” Calm.

“I mean.” Thwip. “It definitely came up. Yup.” Thwip. “Definitely. How far are you from Queens?” Thwip.

“Three minutes,” he sighed, giving up on the act of sounding completely aloof, half waving to Pepper before turning around, stepping into his suit and jumping out of the window. There went the nice, cozy night he had planned.

“Kid? You still there?”

There was a long moment of no rambling and no thwiping and it was unsettling. If Tony knew that getting late night calls was a bad sign, he was sure as heck that random pauses in late night calls where close to the calling of the apocalypse.

“Huh? Yeah. Just, uh.” Thwip. “Try’na avoid getting hit.”

Jesus.

If anyone was going to test his body’s ability to handle stress it wasn’t his own superhero gig or some spandex wearing traitor, it was a goody-two-shoes kid dressed up as a spider.

“Okay, great. You keep doing that and tell me what’s going on.”

Just keep talking, kid, tell me you’re alive.

Peter started talking and while he sounded a little too excited for his taste he let the familiar sound calm him down. As long as Peter was talking, Tony could convince himself that he didn’t have to panic just yet.

He could already see Spider-Man flipping towards another building when a message from Pepper blinked up on his HUD.

Get home safe. Both of you. I’m heading to bed. Love you.

“That was wild, Mr. Stark! Like, super wild. Super mega wild. Super-duper mega –“

“Wild?” Tony suggested in mock seriousness, setting down on the landing pad and watched Spider-Man land gracefully behind him. The second the kid had solid ground under his feet he ripped off his mask and took in a big gulp of air. His hair was mussed, cheeks red and his usually light brown eyes dark, pupils dilated so much not much of the iris was left to be seen.

Typical signs of an active sympathetic nervous system, his mind supplied unsolicited.

“Steady,” he ordered roughly when a bony shoulder bumped into his arm but there was no real force behind it when he reached out to wrap an arm around him to do the steadying himself. As soon as he had him under control he led them to the kitchen to get one of the nutrition bars he had started keeping in stock for Peter’s mutant metabolism.

“S’rry.” The kid grinned up at him sheepishly, rubbing at the mess of curls on his forehead in a poor attempt to tame them. “What’re we gonna do now?”

He raised an eyebrow in silent amusement. “It’s midnight, buddy. You should probably get to bed sometime soon if you wanna make first period.”

“But –“ Peter looked disoriented for a moment, eyes flying back and forth between the clock and Tony felt for him when his searching gaze fell on him. He looked so hopeful, as if he was lost and Tony his compass and he was so certain that he would lead him back home. The genuine trust in his eyes pierced through him and immediately he felt lacking. Thank goodness that deflection was his second nature.

Shoving two granola bars into Peter’s hand, he took a step back to give himself some space to reorient.

“You’re too excited to sleep?”

There was a vigorous nod that had crumbs falling everywhere.

“Figures,” he sighed, “The aftereffects of adrenaline are never fun.” He watched the teenager devour the second bar in mere seconds, mind whirling with doubt. “Do you want me to stay with you until you are tired enough to go to bed?”

Wide eyes found his and, mouth still full, Peter gave a timid nod, uncertain question marks clear in the twinkle of his eyes and the way he cocked his head to the side slightly.

“Okay, let’s make some tea and put on a movie. What do you wanna watch? Frozen?” He turned around to start rummaging through the kitchen for herbal tea.

That must’ve been enough for Peter to finally swallow his food and get his bearings. “How do you even know about Frozen, Mr. Stark? Are you a fan?” he quipped.

He half-turned, kettle in hand, grinning when Peter plopped down on the couch and immediately tucked himself into the blanket Pepper had neatly folded and stashed on the arm rest before she had gone to sleep. “Have you been outside last year? Show me someone who doesn’t know about Frozen.”

“Fair point,” Peter agreed easily, mind obviously already a step further. “What’s your favorite Star Wars?”

“Uh,” Tony put the kettle on the stove, “I have seen about as many Star Wars movies as I’ve seen Frozen movies.”

“You –“ The way Peter turned must put a painful strain on his neck but he looked too scandalized to notice. “What?”

The kettle whistled and he put in two bags of Pepper’s herbal tea before replying, “I have never watched Star Wars.”

“Oh my –“ For the second time that evening Peter looked utterly confused which, for a kid that smart, was especially amusing. “What rock have you been living under? I thought everyone knew Star Wars. Especially old people.”

“Hey!” He admonished but had to admit that it lost much of its brunt when he put down two steaming glasses of tea and started tugging at the blanket to cover Peter’s foot fully. “Be nice to me.”

“I’m being super nice, Mr. Stark. ‘Cause I’m gonna introduce you to a galaxy far, far away. The best galaxy.”

Tony watched in amusement as Peter ordered F.R.I.D.A.Y. to put on Episode IV and then looked eagerly back at him. “You’re gonna love it.”

“This is supposed to make you tired, squirt,” he reminded him, tapping his knee gently.

“It will,” he promised, “Star Wars always calms me down.”

The way he said it made Tony pause, made his heart ache with the harsh reality this kid had had to face and how bright he still was despite of it. Instead of an answer he pushed the glass of tea into his hands and made sure he was all tucked in before starting the movie.

Surprisingly enough Peter wasn’t lying. Halfway through the movie his breathing had evened out so much that Tony thought he was already asleep, cheek mushed into one of the big pillows, curled in on himself.

When the movie was over he stirred, slurring “G’nna watch the rest t’morrow?”

“Maybe let’s split it up a little, whataya say?” He reached out to brush some of his curls from his forehead, surprised by the gentleness of the gesture. “But we can watch them together if you want to.”

“Promise?”

“Pinky promise, kiddo.”

ii.

With Peter it wasn’t exactly hard to notice when something was off.

Even Tony, who admittedly was often too caught up in his own world to be fine-tuned into other people’s feelings and was much more comfortable fixing a cranky robot than moody human, could see it from a mile away. Or maybe that was a new kind of sense that began and ended with Peter Parker’s wellbeing. Oh well, he tried not to dwell on that.

The thing about Peter was that, when he was fine, his entire being radiated contentment, his voice tripped with excitement and his eyes shone with laughter. On a good day he was the picture perfect golden retriever puppy and similarly receptive to hugs and hair ruffles.

Today, though, his usual exuberance had visibly deflated and when he came to the workshop he punched in his code and then continued to scuff towards his workstation with only a passing hello. That was not the Peter Tony knew and, frankly, it was worrying to see someone normally so eager and lively so … lacking of life for lack of a better word.

The thing about Tony was that he was, by his own standing, probably the least equipped to deal with someone having a bad day. Heck, his own bad days usually ended in working through every meal, chugging coffee by the gallon and seeing no sun light for hours on end and even he knew that wasn’t healthy.

So he kept quiet at first and let Peter work in hopes of it calming him down because what did he know about healthily dealing with teenage angst on a Wednesday?

He kept a close eye on him, though, because for how much Tony didn’t think he was equipped to handle Peter’s bad days he also wanted to chase the shadows from his face and the hardness from his stance however cliché that sounded.

He wanted to help, he did. He just didn’t know how. So he watched from afar and contemplated.

When Peter dropped the screw driver a third time and was getting more and more agitated with the web shooter he was working on, Tony decided to stage an intervention ‘cause what the heck. He hated seeing the kid so down.

Rolling his chair over to the teenager’s work bench he picked up the tool before Peter could. “You wanna tell me what’s up, squirt?”

Peter glared, which was about as intimidating as a golden retriever puppy glaring, “Nothing,” and reached for the screw driver. Which Tony pulled out of reach at the last moment. Which made him look even more like a puppy. It was all in the big brown eyes, he decided then.

“You’re a terrible liar.”

“I have a secret identity.”

“Which I found out about in like a day.” He leaned back with a grin and started throwing the screwdriver in the air and effortlessly catching it.

“You’re Tony Stark,” the kid gave back with an eye roll, catching the tool before Tony had the chance to. “But I’m fine, honestly.”

“I mean,” he crossed his arms and watched him turn back to his web shooter rather listlessly, “considering that you not being fine usually means you’re bleeding out in an alleyway I’m not entirely reassured.”

“I’ve never bled out in an alleyway.”

“Yeah, because I flew in to get you before you could.”

“Why do you even care?” Peter snapped at him, a flicker of teenage annoyance dancing in his eyes before vanishing in the time it took Tony to ponder the fact that even this seemingly perfect kid could be annoyed. Finally. “Sorry,” he sighed, proving yet again how much better he was than literally anyone else, “I’m just annoyed.”

If that wasn’t a break-through, than he didn’t know what was. Silently patting himself on the back, Tony reached out to turn Peter’s chair so he was facing him and gently took the screw driver from his hands, putting him down on the work bench before giving the kid his full intention.

“What are you annoyed about?”

He shrugged indifferently, not meeting his eyes, “I don’t know. I just... Ned and I got into an argument and he was being so… so stubborn about it. Like, it wasn’t even that bad but he just wouldn’t budge.”

“Oh no, a stubborn teenager. Someone call the zoo we’ve found an endangered species,” he deadpanned.

Peter glared again but Tony could also see him bite down on his lower lip to keep it from curling upwards.

“Sorry, sorry. What did you and Ned fight about?”

“It wasn’t a fight… not really,” he corrected, “And it was dumb. Like, really ridiculous to be so annoyed about it. It’s not… it’s just stupid.”

Cocking his head to the side ever so slightly he raised an eyebrow and repeated calmly, “What did you argue about? I mean, if you don’t wanna talk about it that’s fine but if it’s got you so up in arms about it maybe you should is all I’m saying.”

“You’re gonna think it’s stupid,” Peter pouted.

“Maybe,” Tony shrugged, “But it’s still okay to be angry about something stupid sometimes. You don’t wanna know about half the things Rhodey and I fought about back in the days. Still do, actually.”

“Now I kinda do,” Peter grinned, then paused. “We argued about the Jedi code.”

“You… argued about the Jedi code,” Tony repeated dumbly, “Like… The Star Wars guys running around in wardrobes? They have a code?”

Big brown eyes flew up to meet his, full of indignation “Of course they have a code! There’s actually a couple different versions of it which is what we were arguing about because he said –,“ Peter stopped speaking midsentence, mouth slamming shut audibly. “It doesn’t matter… You don’t… you don’t have to listen to this, honestly, Mr. Stark.”

He made sure to school his expression and started speaking deliberately slowly, “Peter. I know I don’t have to listen to this. And, as you’ve pointed out before I am Tony Stark and you know I rarely do anything I don’t want to but, kid, you gotta know at this point that I like having you around and I like talking to you. That doesn’t just hold true when you’re your usual bubbly self but also, and especially when you’re not. This is clearly important to you. And if it’s important to you, I’m interested.”

He waited until Peter gave him a nod of understanding, timid as it may be, and leaned back in his chair again, “So tell me about this discourse in the Star Wars fandom.”

The kid didn’t have to be told twice and Tony felt his soul settle when he watched him perk up and dive into what must’ve obviously been weighing him down.

“Okay, so the Jedi code most commonly used goes like: There is no emotion, there is peace. There is no ignorance, there is knowledge etcetera which, you know, it’s mostly meant to be used as a mantra for meditation to, like, get to a place where you don’t let your emotions overtake you and stuff. And I get that, I do.”

When Tony gave an earnest nod to show he was listening, Peter continued. “But it wasn’t always like that. It used to be: Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge, and so on. And I like that one better because it acknowledges the fact that Jedi do have emotions like everyone else, too, right? I think that’s important! And this whole black-and-white view of ‘There’s no emotion whatsoever’ makes me so mad!”

He was gesticulating wildly, cheeks reddening with fervor as he spoke.

“Putting aside how hypocritical the whole thing sounds, you can’t make people think that having emotions will put them on a direct path to the Dark side when so much of the goodness of the Good side comes from how much they care. It’s all about controlling those emotions enough to not make bad decisions based on them but – Why can’t there be peace with emotion? By giving their Padawans the feeling that they’re in the wrong for being… well, for being people they just make it so much easier for them to fall to the Dark side!”

“It just – it makes me mad how black-and-white they want to make the world seem. And by doing that they start lying to themselves and to their students and what good does a code do when it’s impossible to hold yourself to it? You can’t just go around telling people there’s no Death but the Force when that is, objectively, a lie. Whereas Death, yet the Force acknowledges that people die but gives you the closure of knowing where you’ll find them again and the belief that they’re still with you, somehow. I think … I think that’s beautiful.” Once he was done he slumped together on his chair.

“Feeling better now?” Tony asked, reaching out to pat the top of his head.

“Yeah, a little,” he sighed, “I’m annoyed that we even argued about it but I also don’t like how he wouldn’t even listen to my point of view, ya know?”

“Well, did you listen to his side?”

“I mean,” Peter blinked up at him sheepishly, “Kinda?” The corners of his lips tugged upwards and he gave a shrug, “Maybe not as much as I should have,” he admitted with a sigh. They fell silent for a moment, Tony giving Peter the time to work through the wall his mind had built up.

“Guess I’m gonna text him an apology for not listening and that it’s okay that we have different opinions.”

“Atta boy!” Tony grinned at him and while he knew none of Peter’s maturity was his doing, his heart still swelled with pride of how good Peter was.

“Can we watch Star Wars now?”

“You got your homework done?”

Peter rolled his eyes. “Yes.”

“Hungry?”

He laughed, exasperated, “Nothing some popcorn couldn’t fix.”

Tony smiled, then sobered and gave him a once over. “You okay?”

Peter nodded, a lone strand of curl bobbing back and forth, smile soft and true. “Yeah.”

Well, that settled it. He clapped his hands once and got up from his chair in a swift motion. “Then let’s watch... What comes after Episode six?”

“Episode one!” Peter jumped up, grabbing his wrist like a child pulling their parent towards a candy store, “You’ll finally meet Anakin. And honestly that’s exactly my point! Maybe if they hadn’t told him that all emotion is bad –“

He let himself be dragged upstairs and listened to him rambling over the Jedi code and he realized, in that instant, that he was truly, irrevocably happy.

iii.

“I cannot believe I let you put me into this,” he complained, his voice breathy and rough.

Peter pulled on his white robe and fastened his light saber in its holder for the umpteenth time. “To be fair, you were the one who wanted a mask. I wanted you to go as Obi Wan.”

“He is blond, Peter,” he shot back like he had the last hundred times they’d had this conversation. He looked around through the dark lenses of his mask, the HUD he had installed blinking up to scour the crowd for possible threads, and sighed, “I miss the days where I was oblivious to Star Wars and didn’t have an annoying teenager dragging me to these things.”

“No, you don’t.”

He was glad the mask hid his smile at the easy banter. It was bad enough Peter knew exactly how wrapped around his little finger he was, he didn’t have to show it time and time again.

“Okay, I don’t. But you still owe me one.”

“But Mr. Sta-a-ark,” he said, dragging his last name for at least two more syllables than it had and looking as pitiful as if he’d actually just lost his hand, “I’m already being punished enough. We’re going to MOMA next semester.”

Despite himself, Tony could feel the fondness shine through as he chuckled, “Excuse me, are you actually voicing dislike in something? Are you actually my Peter Parker or have you officially become a rebel now?”

The kid giggled, honest to god giggled, and shrugged, “Guess there’s a lot of things you don’t know about me, Mr. Stark. I do dislike things!”

“Really? Name three.” He raised an unimpressed eyebrow, leveling Peter with a glare before realizing that the gesture was completely lost in his costume. Not even the tone translated. He really needed to figure something out for that next time. He couldn’t have his natural charm get lost in the Dark side.

The thought made him stop dead in his tracks – thankfully still unseen by the Jedi next to him. Next time? He hated this costume with a passion why would he consider wearing it again?

Unbeknownst to the inner whirlwind that were his thoughts, Peter actually answered his question after floundering for a bit.

“Well, I don’t like bad people. And hurricanes. And MOMA. Even though, MOMA really never did anything to me, I’d just rather go somewhere else y’know. I mean, it’ll probably be kinda nice anyway? So yeah, maybe I don’t not like MOMA. But – I still don’t like, uh, racists?”

Ah, yeah, that was why he was actually thinking about a next time in this ridiculous outfit. Because of Peter freaking Parker.

“Those are all very good things to dislike, Mr. Parker, but I was actually hoping that all people with a little decency and common sense disliked those things,” he teased. “Just admit that you do not have a single mean bone in your body and that it’s physically impossible for you to dislike anything.”

“That’s not –“

“I love your cosplay, man!” some guy in a badly made Yoda costume whose ears were precariously close to falling off the side of his head and were only held in place by a few strands of grey fuzz interrupted him and the disturbance would have annoyed Tony had Peter’s face not started positively lighting up at the compliment.

“Thank you!” he replied easily with a face splitting grin, “I love yours, too. What’d you use to make the ears?”

“Just papier-mâché”, Yoda replied, obviously taken aback by the interest in his own costume by someone with an obviously home-made light saber. He seemed excited, though, and started rambling about something until he let his eyes wander to the side and took in Tony’s appearance for the first time.

“Oh my god,” he gasped, yes, gasped, and gaped at him like a fish pulled out of water, “That is the best father and son costume ever! Can I take a picture of the two of you?”

And before Tony could so much as utter a word, Peter had already nodded his consent and leaned against him with a huge grin on his face and the other kid was fumbling for his phone and started snapping pictures of them. And then a selfie, because of course.

“Is this real life?” he breathed out almost silently.

“It might just be fantasy,” his sassy AI replied instantly, earning him another gasp and round of big, wide eyes from Yoda.

“Did your mask just reply to you? And did the eyes light up? How did you do that?”

“It’s just a, uh,” very high-tech AI system that was talking back to him, “it’s like Google glasses.” He cringed internally and could feel more than see Peter snicker against his side.

“Oh, like the ones Tony Stark always wears?”

By now Peter was having to work so hard on holding back his laughter that he had gone almost rigid, grinning from ear to ear and happily answering for him. “Yes, yes, Tony Stark is totally wearing Google glasses.”

“Ah, well, I think yours are cooler anyway. I mean you’d never find Tony Stark at the Star Wars midnight premiere.”

Oh, don’t I wish, he thought, ruefully imagining how comfortable he could be on his own couch right now.

Peter, though, Peter was loving this which made him reconsider his earlier statement about the mean bones in his body.

“Yeah, you’re way cooler than Tony Stark. Right, dad?”

Oh for goodness sake. That sassy dad should not do the things to his heart that it was currently doing. That could not be healthy.

“Sure,” he cleared his throat to get rid of the pesky emotions in there, “I mean, Tony Stark is a pretty cool guy but, uh, yeah, so much cooler.”

And, as if someone had heard his prayers, the doors to the movie theater were opened and a reverent murmur went through the crowd before people – droids and aliens, Jedi and Sith alike – started wandering in and taking their places and finally, finally the thing they were actually here to see could begin.

Tony would complain about that day to anyone who would listen (and to some, like Pepper, who wouldn’t) but when Peter sent him one of the pictures the Yoda guy had taken, he framed it and put it up next to the picture of him and Rhodey proudly presenting Dum-E in his lab.

Until, of course, when he broke it in a moment of uncontrollable grief because looking at all he used to have just hurt too dang much.

iv.

“You coming, kiddo?”

The voice came out of nowhere, startling him so much he almost toppled over the front porch’s wooden railing he was leaning against.

“Wha-“ he whirled around and his heart simultaneously sang and sank, “Oh, it’s just you.”

“Yeah, just me. Sorry to disappoint.” The quip fell from his lips easily but his mentor’s dark eyes shone with concern. Somehow that made the lump in his stomach grow even heavier.

“That’s not – I mean, uh, I’m not –“ he stumbled over his words, cringing at how high-pitched his voice sounded even to his own ears, “Sorry. I’m –“

He stopped midsentence when he realized that he wasn’t sure what he wanted to say and just shrugged, coupled with a small smile that was definitely fake and evidently did not convince Mr. Stark of anything.

He was still coming closer, slowly and careful of the shiny prosthetic that sat where his arm used to be.

The image made Peter sick and he tried to focus on his face instead. There were a few more wrinkles than he remembered, especially around his eyes and mouth – from laughing no doubt. He was sporting more grey hair, too, and he looked comfortable in his dark blue cardigan where he used to wear suits or band shirts. He looked exactly like someone who lived happily in a lake house.

“You okay, squirt?”

He snapped out of his spiraling thoughts and, on reflex, started nodding.

“See,” he stopped when he was next to him and leaned against the railing, too, facing Peter who turned to face the small boat that was moving ever so slightly with the lake’s small ripples. “I don’t believe you.”

Huh.

“You’re not okay.” It was a statement, leaving no room for him to argue.

“But –“ He was cut off and a part of him was glad for it because what was he going to say anyway? He was a bad liar and Mr. Stark good at reading him. That, at least, was something that hadn’t changed.

“None of us are really okay and that’s okay,” Mr. Stark said and turned to watch the lake now, too. “Or so I’ve been told repeatedly. But, as I’ve also been reliably informed, we have to talk to each other to get better.”

He shrugged and crossed his arms in front of his chest, tugging both hands under his arm-pits to keep them from shaking.

“No talking, I take it?”

He shrugged again.

“Would you let me hug you?”

His head snapped up instantly. The question came as a surprise but sounded honest and hesitant and attentive and it made his head spin. But, when he took a moment to think about it, he ended up nodding. He didn’t think there was a whole lot he would refuse the man for a while.

Almost immediately he was being wrapped into a strong healthy arm and pulled close until Mr. Stark could bury his face in his hair and take in a deep breath. He couldn’t help but notice how heavily his mentor was leaning against the railing while holding him but he also noticed how his entire body seemed to loosen as the hug went on, how tension and worry slowly sept out of his stance.

Peter noticed the same for himself, too, and somehow that made him want to cry.

The arm around him was steady and it held him together when everything had seemed to fall apart and his head was spinning and he felt his eyes tear up and his heart beat speed up and he suddenly wished that he could stay here forever.

Which was ridiculous. Mr. Stark just wanted to give him a quick hug and go on with his day. He couldn’t know how liberating his touch felt, how cared for and valued and loved Peter felt just by being in his arms and he couldn’t just tell him. He couldn’t –

But it felt so nice.

“Hey, hey, bud,” Mr. Stark sounded worried and it felt like he wanted to pull away and Peter’s breaths started coming in quicker at the thought. There was a sound somewhere in the back of his throat and Mr. Stark stopped pulling away but still loosened his grip.

“It’s okay, kiddo,” he shushed him and Peter had to swallow down a sob because this was getting ridiculous but it felt so nice, “It’s gonna be okay, I promise. It’s gonna be okay.”

After a moment he had caught himself enough to not start breaking down and gave a nod. “I’m –“ he sniffed and whispered, “Thank … Thank you, Mr. Stark.”

For a moment it seemed like his mentor wasn’t going to say anything but then he gave a small smile and pulled him into his side instead. “Anytime, kiddo. Now let’s watch Rogue One. The Force is telling me it’s time for a high stakes-tragedy-comfort movie.”

Despite himself, Peter let out a wet giggle. “There’s never a wrong time for Star Wars, Mr. Stark.”

“I know, I know. It’s tradition. Or so you keep telling me,” he said and the fondness in his voice almost made Peter cry again.

He didn’t, though.

They went back into the empty lake house – May, Pepper and Morgan were having a girls day apparently – made themselves comfortable on the big couch and put on the movie as if they had never done anything else. They moved like a well-oiled machine, like a team that had been working together forever.

Peter was curled into Mr. Stark’s side and his thumb was constantly caressing his knee and it felt wonderful. It felt like home.

The lump in his throat never left.

Somehow it kept growing with every passing minute and with it the loneliness and while he felt right at home it also felt like he shouldn’t. His body felt out of place, as if all the pieces of him had never truly reintegrated, leaving him with holes in his being that he wasn’t sure how to fill.

He watched Chirrut Îmwe blindly walk across battlefields and single-handedly eliminate an entire garrison, trusting the Force to keep him safe and the blazing desire for that kind of certainty hit him unaware.

Maybe that was the whole problem, he realized slowly, as he watched Galen’s message to his daughter and that was when the first tear fell, silent and painful.

Ever since he had come back barely anything had seemed certain anymore. There had been things he had believed to be unchangeable but then a mad Titan had snapped his fingers and his beliefs had turned into dust alongside his body and half the universe and then he had come back and everything had been different and even things that appeared to be the same just weren’t.

May had been gone, too. They still loved each other the same way they always had. Unconditionally. Unquestioningly. Easy. She never had to miss him, never faced a world without him in it. She was the only constant he could claim but everything else –

He couldn’t understand how it had been five years and Mr. Stark had a wife and a kid and a lake house and how he could have still missed him with all that. How he could’ve even had the time. Why would he miss Peter of all people? And, and…

Mr. Stark’s affection was different now. Fiercer, gentler, more… more parental. Or maybe it wasn’t different but he was more open with it. He looked at him the way he looked at Morgan and he couldn’t make sense of that. He couldn’t.

Why would anyone miss me?

He kept circling back to the same question.

Whywhywhywhy- Why me?

He didn’t notice he started full on crying until suddenly the screen in front of him was blurry and his cheeks were wet and his breaths came in rough. He tried to breathe through it, to keep his body calm and steady so Mr. Stark wouldn’t notice but it made his lungs feel like they were on fire trying to keep it all in.

As if he had read his thoughts Mr. Stark’s hand moved up from where it had been resting on his knee and started rubbing slow circles into his scalp. He didn’t move otherwise, made no attempt to pull away and when he spoke his voice was barely more than a whisper.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

Did he? He knew if he started talking, he’d start spiraling and he’d lose the last ounce of self-control he was clinging to. He didn’t want that.

He shook his head, but his body started shaking more violently anyway when he couldn’t breathe through the sobs anymore.

“Shh, that’s okay, buddy, that’s fine,” Mr. Stark murmured, “But stop trying to bite down on your tears. I know how much that hurts. It’s okay. Let it out. I’m here.”

He kept talking – quietly, soothingly, calmly – and at some point Peter’s body decided to listen and he stopped trying to keep quiet and when the first sob broke through his lips he buried his head in Mr. Stark’s stomach and let himself cry.

It hurt and more often than not Mr. Stark had to remind him to slow down his breathing so the oxygen could reach his brain and it didn’t seem to ever stop. But it was also freeing.

Every sob that tore through him gave voice to a pain he had buried inside like needles in his soul that he was pulling out one after the other. For the first time since he had come back he felt like he could breathe again.

His lungs were finally uncurling fully, the weight that had been sitting on his ribcage was gone. He could breathe and at first he gulped in the air like someone pulled from certain death through drowning. He felt like he had been suffocating for weeks and this was the first time someone had pulled his head above water again.

“Slowly, squirt, slowly. Breathe nice and slowly, the air’s not going anywhere, I promise.”

And if Mr. Stark promised to keep his head above water it must be right. After all, Mr. Stark always kept his promises.

They didn’t exchange anything other than those small reassurances and soothings until the end of the movie. And Peter shed a few tears when the inevitable happened but he was tired and cried out and so emotionally drained he wasn’t sure he would ever be able to feel again.

Still, when Princess Leia appeared on the screen he felt the same flutter of hope in his chest that he always felt when he watched it and his soul settled.

“Hope,” she said on screen and the single syllable word echoed through his body, spreading like a bonfire and melting places that had been numb for days.

Everything was going to be okay.

When the credits started rolling, that’s when Mr. Stark started talking again starting with a cough to clear his throat that sounded like he had been crying, too.

“I know you may not want to talk about it, Pete, but I feel like we should.” He sighed and he sounded sad and strong at the same time. More importantly, though, he never stopped running his fingers through his hair. “You may not have heard but I’m a responsible adult now. Someone who makes kids talk about their problems.”

Peter snorted and Mr. Stark gave a chuckle.

“Granted, Morgan’s tears are usually about whether or not we’re letting her have that second juice pop but we do talk about that.”

“You give her the juice pop, don’t you?” His voice was scratchy but Mr. Stark didn’t comment on that. He laughed quietly.

“It depends, honestly. On whether or not Pepper is around when the tantrum starts.”

“You’re a great dad to her,” he whispered in reply and if he had thought he had calmed down just half a minute earlier then his heart felt like splitting open again now. He couldn’t put the finger on it, didn’t want to admit to himself that it was jealousy of the time they had that he would never get. He hated himself for thinking about it. If anyone deserved a family it was Mr. Stark and Morgan was the sweetest child. It was just –

Morgan belonged with her family, she was a Stark through and through – stubbornness and smarts and all. And Mr. Stark belonged with Pepper and his daughter, too. He knew that. He wanted that for them.

He just – he had thought that he had kind of belonged with Mr. Stark, too, but how could he now that he had been gone for five years? How could he ever belong anywhere ever again?

“As they say; practice makes perfect,” Mr. Stark spoke, completely oblivious to Peter’s thoughts, “Guess it gets easier the second time around.”

For a moment he forgot to spiral into self-doubt and angst and stopped. A Second… Second time? Huh?

As if he sensed the wordless question, his mentor pulled him closer and buried his face in his hair again. It seemed to soothe him as much as it calmed Peter. He seemed comfortable this close. Happy, at home.

“See, squirt, I know that I didn’t raise you. I would never take that honor and privilege from May and your Uncle Ben and your parents. They made you in the person you were when I met you and that person was already better than anything I could have ever hoped to achieve. But then,” he paused as if unsure how to continue, “We did meet and I did get the honor of being in your life, of mentoring you, of caring for you. I made a lot of mistakes at first and – My biggest mistake was trying to keep you at arm’s length.”

“I don’t – I don’t understand,” Peter whispered, pushing himself up far enough to meet his mentor’s eyes that were glistening with unshed tears. His gaze softened even more when he saw his own tear stained cheeks and red rimmed eyes and there was a shadow of anguish and a spark of love in them.

“I know,” he sighed, never breaking eye contact but shifting them into a more comfortable position, “You can’t understand because I never told you. Not really. But, Peter, you have to know, that you’re my kid. You are as much my kid as Morgan is. You made me want to be a dad, made me want to prove that I could because I wanted to be one to you and I didn’t want to fail you. And –“ he stopped and a shudder went through his body, “And then I did. I failed you and I – I never forgave myself for that. And I never stopped missing you. God, I missed you so much, Pete.”

But … “Why would you… Why me?”

“Because, Peter. Because you’re my boy and I love you and the world was so much darker without you in it and because every awful moment would’ve been less awful with you and every good moment would’ve been perfect. I – I kept going, I went on because I had to. Because there were Pepper and Rhodey and then Morgan. I had to keep going but that doesn’t mean I didn’t miss you every single second of every single day.”

“I’m scared that I don’t belong anymore. That I don’t belong anywhere anymore,” he admitted finally. The shameful confession uttered so quietly that the words almost got lost in his mentor’s heavy breaths on his cheeks.

“Oh,” Mr. Stark looked at him stunned, like he had grown a second head for a good moment before leaning forward and pulling him back in, holding him tighter than he had ever held him. Both arms folding across his back with the prosthetic cutting into his skin but it didn’t matter, it didn’t. Because he felt held together in place, in a place where he belonged and where he was wanted. He was being anchored and kept from drifting off into the infinite vastness of space and he was so incredibly grateful.

“You belong here, kiddo,” he took in the fierce words in his ear, let them run down his back and warm him like a hot shower after a cold day. “You belong with me and you belong with May. You belong in Queens and you belong here, in this lake house that has been planned with your bedroom in mind. You belong with your family and, for as long as you let me, I will never let you go ever again.”

He cried some more after that – cried himself to sleep that night in fact – but Mr. Stark was there the whole time, holding him, whispering reassurances and tickling a wet smile out of him eventually. The next day was a little bit better. The self- doubt didn’t evaporate, didn’t leave right away.

Some days were worse than others, some were better. Some the voices in his head had him going mad with why’s and what-if’s and some days he couldn’t even hear them over Morgan’s giggles and May’s bad jokes and Mr. Stark lecturing Dum-E.

Coming back wasn’t easy by any means and it did take a while but a couple of weeks later, he jumped out of Happy’s new SUV, running up to the front porch and flying into Mr. Stark’s waiting arms, and his thoughts hummed happily with only one thought.

I’m home.

#irondadsecretsanta #irondad #iron dad #irondad fic #peter parker #tony stark #star wars #josis fic #chaos yet harmony #merry christmas!!

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