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nctsplug02 · 10 months

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[6:12PM]

GENRE: fluff, smut, parents au, pregnancy au.

WARNINGS: the word giggle and laugh are overused in this, milf and dilf to twins (ages; 4), reader is pregnant (5 and a half months long), gentle parenting, kissing, breast play, nipple play, fingering, cum eating, oral sex (F receiving), creampie, breeding, degrading and praising.

AN| i put the actual request in my drafts and i went back to find it and it was buried all the way down under like fifty fucking other drafts. i feel like a damn hoarder, i apologize for not finishing most of them. ALSO, i know this isn’t a mark dad au request but.. just enjoy LOL! <3

the water runs and covers up your soft moans and giggles as mark kneads your breasts. “mark,” you whine with a giggle interrupting. “i really need to make dinner and you’re keeping me from doing so!”

mark nibbles on your neck and you let out a moan as he nibbles on your sweet spot. “marrrkk, please.” you could feel marks smirk as he nibbles on your neck and kneads your breasts.

screams and something being knocked down causes you and mark to pull away.

“i said stop it!” one screams.

“and i said i don’t wanna!” the other screams.

“mommy!” they both scream and you turn around, pulling yourself from mark.

mark sighs and follows you to the living room where your four year old twins are at. “okay, what’s goin’ on?” you walk in the living room with your hands on your hips.

“mommy! minhyun was—!” your youngest says.

“mommy! minjin, he—?!” your oldest shouts over your youngest.

“okay— nuh-uh, we aren’t gonna do this.” you say making a mouth-zipping gesture.

the two grumble and then your oldest shoves your youngest. “wha—? argh!” your youngest shoves your oldest causing him to stumble back and fall on his ass.

“mommy, did you see what he did?!” your oldest whines and points to your youngest who hovers above him.

you gasp when your youngest smacks your oldest. “okay, no— no, that’s enough! mark,” you turn to your husband who watches while laughing. “stop laughing and help me pull these two apart!”

you sighs and attempt to grab your youngest before he can jump on his older brother but your hand slips from his arm and your youngest throws himself onto his eldest. you pull your youngest off your oldest and you sit the screeching boy on the couch.

you go next for your oldest but when you hover above him, he sits up and shoves you.

“ah— minhyun!” you gasp.

“alright, woah, woah. you do not do that, minhyun.” mark marches up to the boy and gentle pushes you to the side. “you do not push or hit your mommy, do you hear me?”

“i’m sorry, daddy.” the boy cries to mark but mark shakes his head. “you need to apologize to your mom, that was very disrespectful of you. i genuinely thought i raised you better than this.”

the sobbing boy turns to you and lifts his arms, you sigh and lift the crying boy up. you balance the boy on your hip and you wipe his tears.

“i—i’m sorry, mommy. i’m really sorry.” the boy hiccups and your heart melts.

“oh, honey.” you kiss his forehead. “it’s okay,” the boy still sniffles and hiccups as more tears fall down his fat cheeks. “now you know to never ever hit mommy, right?”

“mm—mhm,” the boy nods, his body jerking every time he hiccups. you bring your son and you sit him next to his older brother.

you lower yourself onto your ass and you sigh. “now, minjin, can you tell mommy why you’re upset.” your youngest nods, wiping his tears with the back of his hand. “i wanted to w—watch paw patrol b—but minhyun said no and then he hit my arm a—and grabbed the control from me.” the boy wipes more tears that spill from his eyes.

you look at your oldest who shrinks with guilt. “and, minhyun, can you tell mommy why you’re upset.” the older one bite his lip and sighs. “i really wanted to watch daniel the tiger but when i told minjin, he said no and grabbed the controller from me!”

“okay, i understand that you both aren’t agreeing on a few things. why don’t we watch a movie that we all like to watch together, yeah?”

the two boys look at each other and nod.

“alright, my loves. can you both apologize to each other and give a hug to one another?” the two nod once again and they slide off the couch, coming together and giving each other a nice hug while apologizing.

“minhyun, what you saw minjin do is something you should never ever do. not to me, not to your dad, not to anyone.” your oldest nods.

“i love you two, very very much.” you say to them and you hug them both very tightly. “my sweet sweet boys.” you whisper, giving them both a kiss on the head.

you pull away and sigh. “now, should we coco, again?” the boys nod and cheer. “alright, looks like we have an agreement! i’ll have daddy put on coco for you two and then we’re gonna go back to making dinner, alright?” the two nod and sit on the couch.

you attempt to stand but the belly weighs you down and does you no justice. “damn it.” you mumble under your breath and then you turn on your side, pushing yourself up from your knees.

“geez, mark.” mark throws his hands up in defense with his mouth open as a shocked expression. “a little help would’ve been appreciated.”

“wha— baby, im sorry.” his voice becomes whiney. “alright, i don’t need another crying child. i’ve dealt with two and i don’t think i wanna make it three.” you go back to washing the veggies that sat in a bowl in the sink.

mark scoffs with a half laugh. “well, a little to late, babe. it’s gonna be three— especially with that baby that i knocked you up with.” mark rubs your belly and you tsk. “oh, shut up!” you shove mark.

“oh, my god.” you put a hand over your mouth. “i know where my sweet angels get their shoving from.. oh, my goodness.” you sigh and rub your temples. “i am a terrible mother.”

mark smacks your ass causing you to whine and jump towards him while holding your freshly smacked ass. “don’t say that ever, again. do you hear me?” you pout and nod. “good,” mark smirks. “i’m sorry.” he giggles and rubs your ass for you.

“gimme a kiss, pretty.” mark says, pouting his lips and wrapping his arm around the back of your head and the other arm around your waist.

you push your lips out and you go to your tip-toes, meeting marks lips and smiling when feeling him smile.

“m’kay, c’mon, let’s make dinner.” mark says patting and squeezing your ass, again.

“…mmhm, baby. and, i just wanna let you know how amazing you handled the situation. i’m so proud of you, mommy.” mark speaks to you softly while fluffing a pillow and stuffing it under your hips.

your mind is too drowsy to understand what he’s even saying, just too busy focusing on your husbands fat cock sliding back into your cunt.

“ahh’mark,” you push your hips back and mark softly giggles at you.

it was currently eleven at night, you and mark had tucked the boys to bed around 9:30 because 8 seemed a bit too early for their energies to run out.

you and mark had a short bubble bath time together but it was ruined by marks dick stabbing your back. mark suffered with blue balls while washing you and himself up before dragging you to the room and pushing you on the bed.

“nuh-uh, pretty. keep your hips down for me, alright?” you nod.

your back arches more when feeling droplets from marks wet hair drip onto your back.

“you’re so good for me, y/n.” mark says, grabbing your hips with one hand and using the other as something to hold himself above you. “so so good.” mark squeezes your hip.

“and, you’re not a bad mommy. i hear you say that again and i’ll edge you until i feel like letting you cum.”

you moan into the pillow tucked under your chin. “m—mark.. i’m gonna cum.” you pant. “already, baby?” mark chuckles and spanks your ass while slowing down his pace. “w—well, you’ve been t—teasing me all night—ngh!”

“mm,” mark bites his lip. “you have a very valid point, baby. but, i’m not sure i wanna let you cum yet.” you scowl, how could he do this? “mark, i’ve pushed two babies out of my vagina, this last one will be my third. if you don’t let me cu—!”

your rant comes to a stop when mark pinches your clit. “mhm, mhm. you were saying, baby?” you shake your head. “y—you’re so mean.” you huff.

“aww, don’t be like that. c’mon, baby, i’ll let’cha cum, go on.” mark says rubbing your clit.

an annoyed whine cranks up your throat and finally your orgasm comes.

“c—cum in me, mark. i wanna f—feel you cum in me.” mark tuts and shakes his head. “aww, baby. i’m not even close to cumming yet.”

you look back at mark with confused eyebrows and pouty lips when mark pulls out. “marrkk, why’d you—?”

mark flips you on your back and smiles widely. “beautiful.” mark bites his lips and reaches forward, his hands instantly grabbing your breasts.

“mark!” you giggle, arms squeezing together, collecting your pooling breasts. “you’re so pretty, you know that, baby?” mark says, tweaking your nipples.

“mark, stop it. just fuck me, please?” mark looks down and smirks. “you’re soaking wet, baby.” mark runs a finger down your slit and clicking his tongue on the roof of his mouth and shaking his head.

mark leans forward and takes your left breast into his mouth. “you’re so beautiful.” mark mumbles, swirling his tongue around your harden nipple and moaning softly.

mark pulls away and rubs your nipple. “i wanna fuck your tits, baby.” mark whispers and stares up at you through his lashes. “m—my— you said my titties?” mark nods with a wide smile.

you bite your lip, “well, if you really want to.” you say with a shrug and shy grin. “of course i do, baby. especially with these big’ol milkers.” your eyes almost bulge from their sockets. “milkers?! what?!”

“that’s right, baby. i know they’ll fit perfectly around my dick.” mark cups your breast from underneath and jiggles your breasts with giggles.

“you’re not gonna fuck me anymore?” mark stops with your breasts and thinks. “mm, i got it.” mark climbs off the bed and runs to the closet, he retrieves this nude toned toy and baby oil.

it was a dildo. a vibrating dildo that mark had bought off an ad on pornhub. “remember this old thing?” mark asks you, climbing on the bed and turning on the toy dildo.

“is that—?” you gasp when mark slips the buzzing toy into your cunt. “hold that there for me, baby.”

your legs begin to shake and your moans become shaky.

mark crawls up to your chest and chuckles. “it’s been so long since we’ve done this.” mark says, squeezing some baby oil onto his palms and rubbing his hands together after setting down the bottle.

“say, how long has it been since we last titty-fucked?” mark says, rubbing oil onto your breasts and between the valley of them. “i—i think it was four years ago when i was pregnant with t—geez, i’m cumming!” you let out a shaky gasp.

make giggles and shakes his head. make uses the leftover oil on his hands and holds your breasts together. a whimper slips out of marks throat when he sees how beautiful and glossy your breasts are.

“fuck, i’m so hard.” mark mutters and slips his cock between your breasts. “goodness,” he sighs. “i almost forgot how amazing this felt.”

mark looks behind him and giggles when seeing you desperately attempt to fuck yourself with the vibrating dildo.

“i’m so glad your belly isn’t that big yet otherwise we would’ve had some complications, huh?” mark asks, turning back to you.

you nod and bite your lip while holding back from cumming. “y—ye—yeahhh, that’s gr—great, mark!” you hum violently from the vibration.

mark chuckles at you and shakes his head, continuing to thrust his cock between your breasts.

“amazing, love. you’re doing so well. just sitting here and letting me fuck your tits while you fuck yourself with that plastic dick.” mark scoffs.

“m—mark?” mark hums softly, tilting his head and watching as the tip of his cock disappear and reappear from the top of your breasts. “c—can we c—cum together?”

mark chuckles with a whine. “you’re the cutest, aren’t’cha?” you look up at marks eyes and frown. “please, mark?” you plead.

“alright, alright.” mark laughs, giving in.

a few minutes past and within those few minutes, you’re creaming over the dildo with mark shooting his white ribbons on your face.

mark moans lowly and dips his head back, his hips stuttering as he tries to carry on. “f—fuck, baby. gah!” mark hisses.

mark stands on his knees and smirks when seeing your cum-covered breasts. his cum just dripping from your breasts, down the valley, off your nipples, off your chin and jaw.

mark leans forward and begins licking the cum off your breasts. you moan and grab the back of his head, pulling at his barely short strands.

due to his fresh undercut, it was useless to be pulling on his short hairs.

“mark,” you giggle, lifting your chin when mark moves up to your neck and starts sucking all over. “stop.” you place your hands on marks chest.

“‘m sorry, you just taste so good.” mark gags a bit. “uh, beside that baby oil taste.” he rubs the back of his nape.

you laugh and rub his cheek, “markie,” mark hums and nods his head into your palm. “i want you to fuck me, again. please.” mark smiles widely and nods. “anything for you, baby.”

mark finds himself below you with your legs wrapped around his waist and his hands on your hips. marks hips driving into yours while the two of you moan and hiss at the pleasuring sensation.

“you’re such a dirty slut. begging to be fucked in many positions in one night. i love it.” mark says through his gritted teeth.

“markie, i want you to cum in me.” you moan out and you reach forward, grabbing mark by the neck and bringing him down so his stomach his with your bump.

“and, i want you to cum in me, now.” you whispers in his ear.

mark whimpers and humps into you. his hips thrusting desperately forward as he whimpers wildly into your ear.

“‘m gonna put a baby in your belly.” mark groans, grabbing one of your thighs and holding it up against his ribs.

you giggle at him. “markie, i already have a baby in my belly.”

mark groans and shakes his head, suddenly releasing into you without warning. it should’ve been clear when his thrusts started to get sloppy, again.

mark breathes heavily into your neck and pulls away from you. he pulls out and groans, watching as your cunt drips with his cum.

mark looks up at you through his lashes and brings two of his fingers to your pussy, teasing your slit and then slipping them in without a problem.

“m—mark,” you gasp, closing your legs on marks hands. “c’mon, baby. keep’em open for me.” he says softly as he works your gummy walls with his fingers.

mark pulls his fingers away from your cunt and lays flat on his belly. “‘m gonna eat your pretty pussy, alright?” you nod, biting your thumb nail.

mark dives into your cunt and groans, tasting the mixture of your cum and his together. “so sweet.” mark quickly says and dives back in.

“mark.. i’m sensitive.” you whine and gasp while pulling on his long locks. “god, ‘m gonna cum, again.” you cry out and squeeze your thighs around his head.

mark pulls and grips on your thighs while sucking and lapping up your juice. his tongue slurping past your folds.

you go through one last orgasm and finally, mark falls next to you.

he’s all worn out just like you. the two of you breathing heavily. both sweating and sticky.

you whine as mark brings you into his arms. “you’re sweaty.. and sticky.. get away from me.” you heave and mark lets out a laugh. “just wanna cuddle with you, baby.”

you and mark fall in another bit of silence, leading the two of you to sleep.

#ash talks #nctsplug02 #nct imagines #nct scenarios #kpop imagines #kpop smut #nct smut #nct 127 #anon #kpop fluff #mark smut #superm mark #nct mark #mark lee #mark fluff #mark lee smut #nct dilf #nct x reader #nct dad au

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linyki · 10 months

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and we're live. — l.hs

## summary : ever since your freshman year of high school, you’ve been eagerly anticipating the day that you finally take over the leading position within your school’s broadcasting club. now that you’re a junior, your dream is finally within reach — well, until you learn that you have a fellow contender for the role. enter lee heeseung, the tall (and, unfortunately, pretty attractive) hurdle standing in the way of your success. will the two of you manage to settle your differences off-air, or is there only room for one mic? alternatively, lee heeseung has a crush on yn and is only competing for broadcasting club manager because he wants an excuse to talk to her.

## pairing : fem!yn x non-idol!heeseung ## feat : lesserafim (with cameos/mention of zb1, txt.) ## genre : highschool au, one-sided rivals to lovers, fluff, crack, pining. ## warnings : profanity, suggestive humour, death jokes (kms, kys), 13 y/o boy humour. ## status : ongoing. ## taglist : open.

## lin's love note : hi el oh el. im on summer break which means i have an excessive amount of free time. so... what better way to start off my break than by creating a smau !! this is vvv loosely based off of live on bcos i luv hwang minhyun. ask, dm or comment if u'd like to be added to the taglist !!

交 — profiles ! therapy group && wedgie warriors && priv

交 — chapters ! 🖇 : written 01 how to get away with murder (real) 02 that's bonkers 03 yunjin's solution 04 rizzphobic 05 let the games begin ! 06 live, laugh, laxatives 07 sherlock homies 08 revelations 09 get a grip 10 simp city 11 mission: secret admirer (🖇)

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bp-zb1fics · 1 year

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Hi I've been your supporter since the day Im here(I've only been here for 1week) and I really love your bp999 stories.So if you can can I request a Matthew imagine where the mc called him Canada oppa in the final episode and the reader teases him bcs of that thank you very much!

Easy to love (Canada oppa?)

pairing: matthew x reader

genre: canonverse, fluff, lil angst + comfort

tw/tags: very emo at the start more than expected, mayhaps i rewatched episode 12 to get minhyun + matthew speech word per word so here is me citing my reference, tears and crying, ft. seokmae's eomma and noona, stolen kiss, reality of dating an idol

wc: 1456

summary: you and matthew celebrate him making the top 9 but there’s one thing you just can’t let go of.

a/n the poll has spoken haha. first of all, i'm really, really grateful for your support, it gives me such joy to know that my fics are loved. I did intend this to be a bit more humorous when I started your request but it turned into this giant emotional mess, definitely would be happy to do a lighter, more funny part two~ pls enjoy and looking forward to hearing what you think!

Check my pinned for more fics~

“The trainee who will join Zerobaseone in third place….”

You can’t breathe, the air stuck in your chest.

“The trainee who has finally achieved their dream of placing 3rd place in the final Top 9 is…”

Just say it already, dammit.

“Seok Matthew!”

You’re cheering wildly along with the rest of the crowd as Matthew’s shocked expression is blown up on the big screen. As the other trainees surround him, he breaks down and you can’t help tearing up as well.

You’re standing in the section reserved for family, a little bit removed from where Matthew’s mom and sister are. They had insisted you come stand with them but you knew how risky it was. Instead, you’re standing at the side, mask on, choosing to pass as one of the general family members or close friends of the trainees.

His sister turns to you, also teary-eyed and mouths “he did it!” You nod, practically choking back sobs and praying the cameras won’t catch you.

“Trainee Seok Matthew, congratulations. Please come to the front.”

Matthew hugs his fellow trainees one last time before you watch him shuffle forward, still crying. You’re still crying. His mom and sister are still crying as they’re congratulated by the three aunties who you’ve learned are there for Ricky.

As he walks, he glances at the section you’re all standing in, eyes finding you. You manage to shoot a weak thumbs up before he reaches the stage.

“Trainee Seok Matthew captured the hearts of Star Creators from his entrance with his sweet smile.”

It’s not a surprise. He captured your heart first, long before the world got to see that sweet, sweet smile you fell in love with. Matthew was cute and charming and easy to fall for.

“Also his vocals stood out in every performance and helped create a perfect stage.”

But you knew his heart was big and his dreams were bigger. At some point, you were going to have to share him with the world. And you were okay with that. Because Matthew’s talent shines the brightest when he’s performing. You’d give him the world’s biggest stage if you could.

“Trainee Seok Matthew, I sincerely congratulate you for successfully debuting!”

Matthew bows, thanking the MC Hwang Minhyun before looking back at your section. As you subtly wave at him, his face only crumples as he tries to not to sob again. You’re no better, your mask soaked through with how hard you're crying.

Then, the MC says something that will be permanently burnt in your brain forever.

“Yes Canada oppa, Trainee Seok Matthew.”

Despite producing enough tears to create a small puddle, you can’t help but mirror Matthew, nearly doubling over in laughter at the sudden nickname. You’re laughing and crying, truly multitasking at its finest. It’s so perfectly in the moment that you almost don’t catch the second part of the MC’s question.

“How do you feel about achieving your dream of debuting?”

Oh but you’re so clowning him for it later. If he thinks he’s getting away with it, he better think twice.

“I…”

Matthew starts shakily and now you’re back to crying.

“Honestly, this feels like a dream right now. I’ve lost so much confidence recently.”

He’s worried to you over stolen phone calls. What if he failed? What if he didn’t debut? Should he look for a job? Go back to Canada? Thinking about that made you all the more emotional, you tried your best to reassure him but this was an industry that took so much of a person and sometimes left them a shell of themselves. It made them question who they were, what they were worth. It put some of them on a pedestal and let others fall, breaking them apart.

“But my hyungs always took care of me at the dorms and kept telling me that things will go well for me. I couldn't really believe them, but being able to be here now, I am so grateful. Also, the Masters have always encouraged me, so I am grateful to them as well.”

You were grateful for them too. To be there for him, to take care of him when you couldn’t. Your heart squeezed thinking about the months you spent apart, stealing every moment together that you could and shoving it into the recesses of your heart so that no one would take it away from you.

“I have chased this dream for two years. Now, to think that I can finally live my dream everyday, it really feels like a dream. So, I am so happy.”

Matthew was so wide-eyed and in wonder of everything back then. He still is, you think fondly. But there’s a maturity to him now that makes you so proud. He thanks his agency and the program’s staff before turning to your section again.

“My eomma and noona have also come today.”

You watch as his eyes go from them to you and he lets out another sob before apologising, addressing his mom. You can only watch, wishing that you could stand there and comfort her as well. But you love Matthew and this is his dream and you can’t ever bring yourself, for any reason, to take it away from him.

“Eomma, thank you so much for trusting me and letting me come to Korea. I’ve finally made it here, so I will do my best to become a loving and cool son whom you can be proud of.”

God, when will you stop crying?

“I just love you so much, Eomma. I missed you.” And you think he’s done but Matthew doesn’t even breathe. He's still looking at your section but his eyes are only on you as he repeats the sentiment in English.

“I love you and missed you so much.”

His sister shoots you a knowing look as Matthew goes on to thank the Star Creators and wraps up his speech. You wave her away while the cameras follow your boyfriend walking up the stairs. He’s hugging his other group members, so happy, so excited to finally be there.

And you can’t help but smile through your tears.

Because you know how much love Matthew has to give and these boys are incredibly lucky to be on the receiving end of it. You only hope that they’ll love him back. And you know they will, because it’s incredibly hard to not love Seok Matthew.

__________________________________________

The first moment you get is backstage, away from the cameras. You’ve finally agreed to stand with his mom, holding his sister’s hand as you wait for Matthew to wrap up filming. When he walks through the door, all of you are trying your best to not devolve back into a crying mess. You step back, letting him take his time with his family, trying your best to compose yourself.

But by the time he’s in front of you, you can’t help but throw your arms around him. He’s practically holding you up, neither of you wanting to let go. Except you have to at some point. His arms loosen, still holding you but enough so you can face each other. Your lips tremble. You really should say something, anything to keep you from breaking down right in front of him.

“So Canada oppa, is it?”

There’s that smile you know and love.

“Ah really? Is that how you’re going to be?”

“I can’t help it,” you fall back into your easy, comfortable banter, playing with the lapels of his uniform jacket. “It’s iconic really, would be a shame if no one uses it.”

“I missed you.” He says, catching you off guard. “My baby did a lot of crying for me today. Your eyes are still so puffy.”

“You cried too.” You pout at him before letting yourself admit it. “And I really did miss you.”

Matthew looks around, checking for any cameras before he presses a quick kiss to your lips, hands sliding to your waist. This is your life now. He’s not an anonymous trainee anymore. You have to be more careful.

“They’ll give us a few days off before the next official schedule.” he murmurs to you like it’s some grand secret. It probably is, there’s definitely an NDA or two to be signed. “Let’s do something, just us.”

You let yourself smile.

“Okay Canada oppa, text me.”

“You’re really not going to let this go, are you babe?”

“I’m changing your contact name as soon as I get that text.”

You know from now on that it’s not going to be easy for the two of you. But Seok Matthew is easy to love and he chooses to love you. You will get through this.

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blue-jisungs · 5 months

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i keep thinking about like seo yul who has been hired to be a personal guard to the reader. and she's either like the daughter of a rly noble family or a princess just someone rly highly established in society who needs protection

and yul falls in love as soon as he sees her, he's literally so whipped he would do whatever she asked him. and once she realizes that he's not gonna tell her what to do like everyone else in her life, she starts to fall too. and like he helps her sneak out and they're just idiots in love <//3

LIKE U JUST KNOW YUL WOULD BREAK THE RULES WHEN HES SO SO IN LOVE CAUSE HE DID IT BEFORE AND THAT THOUGHT MAKES MY BRAIN GO CRAZY SKDFJSK

training // calming balm

author's note. HI ZANNA CUTIE THANK J FOR THE YUL REQ LIKE I NEEDED RHAT IN MY LIFE!!! i hope u enjoy it bc personally i feel like it isnt the best thing i’ve written :(

summary. yul falls for you // soft moments w yul as your guard

word count. 3,6k

“a bodyguard?” seo yul repeated in disbelief, eyes wide and directed at his uncle. his voice echoed in the wide room as the older man just nodded.

“the l/n family just moved here and they’re a well respected people. their daughter was raised not to cause any harm and live peacefully; therefore, in case of an attack she wouldn’t be able to protect herself” park jin explained calmly. yul just nodded “it’s not going to be a permanent occupation, only until the time they find a professional guard for their daughter”

“i understand” yul bowed gently.

“i’m glad. we’ll pay them a visit in a while, i’d want you to go with me” park jin announced. his nephew didn’t say anything, just nodded. the older watched him leave the room almost as quietly as a rustle of wind.

yul was smiling gently while talking to your parents, genuinely invested in why they moved here. the tea that was served was truly delightful and he couldn’t help himself but ask for more. when the discussion topic turned into a political one, the young mage looked around the garden. the gazebo they were seated in was cozy and prettily decorated, you could see the majority of the open space with one’s bare eye.

suddenly, yul saw a movement behind the peony bushes. he straighted his back and his hand rested on the grip of his sword.

eyes trained on the bush, he frowned upon hearing some voices.

out of the blue, someone fell from the bushes with a yelp. everyone looked that way, lady l/n letting out a huff.

“there she is… gods, this child will make me die because of an heart attack one day” she mumbled.

indeed, there was a young lady standing in front of the peony bush. she was dusting off the pink flower petals and leaves from her pastel purple hanbok. everyone could notice she was saying something to herself and seemingly, she didn’t realise she wasn’t alone.

“this is our daughter, y/n” your father sighed.

you looked up and suddenly saw the four people’s gazes on you. blood of embarrassment rushing to your cheeks, you approached them.

bowing gently you greeted the guests and a young man caught your attention. it seemed that you caught his too – he was staring at you in awe.

“greetings” you mumbled and refused to look at the unfamiliar people.

“where have you been– you know what? i done even wish to know. this is your new bodyguard, seo yul” your father pointed at the young man in light purple hanbok. you smiled upon realising it had the shade as yours. sending him a nod, he bowed.

his face was truly handsome and being honest, you were glad it was him and not the older man seated next to him.

“it is my pleasure to meet you. i promise, a single hair won’t fall off your head as long as i’ll be guarding you” he said softly. his ebony irises were glued to you, enchanted by your beauty. park jin just lifted the corner of his lips in a smirk, noticing how smittened his nephew is.

“and your name is…?” you asked, ignoring the look your mother sent your way.

“seo yul, lady l/n” the brown haired man replied, his feline-alike features causing you to study his face. then, your gaze fell upon his plum-shaded hanbok with tender, blueish sewings forming peonies. how ironic.

“i like your hanbok, seo yul” you smiled and bowed, then looked at your parents “i still need to unpack my baggage so if you’ll excuse me, i shall get going”

they just nodded and dived back in to the conversation whereas the young mage’s eyes followed you until you disappeared inside the house.

you were so pretty and graceful yet – unlike choyeon – you had a rebellious spark in your eye. something in you just intrigued seo yul and he didn’t even notice when he tried to drink from an empty porcelain cup.

the young mage arrived at your residence, the warm sun heating up his skin pleasantly. the fresh air was filled with the scent of flowers that blossomed in the garden, the birds’ singing beautifully filling in the silence.

someone from the servants led him to your chamber and knocked gently, looking at the new addition to the staff.

“lady y/n is very… childish. please, don’t be afraid to tell her no if she has an ridiculous idea or a foolish request” they said. yul frowned and suddenly the door opened, your maid looking the man up and down.

“you may come in” she said and yul stepped inside.

“who is it?” your voice rung in the room yet you weren’t nowhere in sight. only when your maid came to the folding screen and stepped behind it, he realised you’re there.

blush hit his cheeks and he shook his head.

“it’s seo yul, lad–” he started.

“we’re the same age, i assume. please, don’t use any of the honorific words and nicknames” you hummed and then said something to your maid “this ribbon, please”

yul looked around the room. he didn’t spend much time with noble women except choyeon, yet he thought it’s something known that women tend to be tidy. well…

maybe your room was somehow clean, it definitely had it’s own charm. history books on the floor, along with calligraphy supplies. horse-themed ornaments scattered on the wooden furniture, makeup tools next to a pretty mirror and… empty plates.

“can you show me around the city today, yul?”

his gaze snapped up and he felt his face get warm when he noticed you caught him staring. but there was no anger or disgust in your eyes, no. pure amusement and excitement.

“of course” he nodded, taking in the sight of you. today, you decided to wear a faint yellow hanbok. the sewings at the bottom of the dress were gold and formed a beautiful scenery: young deers, forest plants and wild birds. the rest of the clothing, including the frame of your sleeves, was white. there was a yellow ribbon in your braided hair.

“we shall go, then” you grinned and energetically stormed out of the room. he looked shocked at the maid. the older lady just sighed, dramatically wiping her forehead.

“good luck” she just mumbled and seo yul chased after you, with a love-struck smile.

“so? what are you going to show me? can we see the mage place?” you asked, not even turning around when you heard his footsteps approaching.

you knew he’d say no: you heard that only mages were allowed to enter the place and after all – sadly – you were no mage.

“sure, i’ll take you to jeongjinjak. but be aware that the mages might not be too pleased to see you there” he answered casually and just when he caught up with you, you halted your movements. yul realised he had to stop and turn around, blinking.

“really?” you asked in disbelief, lips forming into a huge smile.

“of course, why not?” seo yul returned your smile.

“i thought… ah, it doesn’t matter. we should go, then” you hummed happily.

yul already knew that he won’t be able to resist you.

“oh my, it’s beautiful here” you sighed when you entered jeongjinjak. the place was spacious and quiet, the air filled with a feeling of seriousness and a scent of old books “do you live here?”

yul nodded, his hand intertwined behind his back as you two strolled around the place carefully.

“my uncle is in charge of this place” yul added. passing by some young mages that were training, you sent them a sweet smile and bowed gently.

they all stared at you in awe, immediately losing focus and stumbling over their own feet. giggling at that, you failed to notice the disapproving look yul sent them.

“i always wanted to at least possess the power ryusu” you hummed sadly “but my parents were never willing to find me a teacher, even though they know some of the stages themselves. selfish, isn’t it?”

you turned to yul and his apologetic smile. there was a certain softness in his features, a look that was different to what you always stumble upon. most of the people assumed you’re a spoiled brat and treated you this way. but yul was the only one who didn’t: he was carefully listening and genuinely cared about what you said.

“i can teach you the basics, y/n” he offered and before you could burst out with happiness, he quickly added “but it must remain a secret between us”

“of course it will” you grinned and quickly went to hug him. you realized your actions and froze, feeling ashamed of your impulsiveness. seo yul noticed that and his heart ached with a strange feeling. were you taught to suppress your emotions? “thank you so much, yul”

“it will be my pleasure, la– y/n” he smiled, ebony irises glinting with happiness. you held eye contact for a mere moment longer before there was a sudden bang.

it was the mages in training who were just staring at you and didn’t notice that they tripped over the edge of the passage.

spending time with yul became a part of your routine. however, it wasn’t a negative thing. you loved his company; for the first time ever you felt like you had a friend. someone who truly cared for you.

a knock at your door caused you to smile. yul had a specific pattern of knocking – it sounded like a tender melody, rhythmic but pleasant to listen to.

“come in!” you hummed, finishing braiding your hair. your guard entered, bowing and scanning your figure (not so) secretly.

“good morning” he hummed, stepping in. you could read it on his face that he wanted to add something but halted from doing so. ‘you look stunning today’ was what lingered on his lips, albeit his shyness prevented him from wording it out.

“what should we do today?” you asked, tilting your head.

you adored seo yul – he always kept up with your ideas and temper. most of the maids were old and always too tired to even take a short walk. even though he wasn’t your maid – and certainly, he wasn’t old – he never had a problem with taking strolls around the city or showing you the neighbourhood . sometimes it included walking through hills, high grasses and small rivers. but he was always willing to do so.

“is there something particular you wish to do?” he asked, his tender voice calm as always.

“not really, no” you shook your head.

“then, we could go–”

he wasn’t meant to finish when your mother barged into the room. her face morphing into relief when she noticed you.

“you’re here, good. do not leave the house today, i heard there are some… civil commotions in the city. and it’s been dangerous lately” she said and her eyes met yul’s. he bowed “oh, you’re here. you can go home now. y/n’s not leaving the household today”

“but mother, i–” you started.

“no. it’s too dangerous” she cut you off and left, the maids closing the door behind her.

yul watched your features grow sad and his heart sank. you lost your excitement, eyes gradually fogging with a strange, bland emotion.

“it’s fine. i’m not in the mood anymore, you can go home” you mumbled, turning your face to the window.

“i’m not in the position to disobey your mother’s orders, however i’m your guard” yul offered and carefully studied your reaction “and not to brag or be overconfident, but you’re going to be safe under my watch”

there was a ghost of a smile dancing on your lips as you played with the hem of your hanbok.

“mhm… and what if my parents found out?” you hummed, cocking your eyebrow.

“i’d take the responsibility” yul said seriously. shaking your head, you stood up.

“no need, i was just teasing you. shall we go, then? where are we going, anyway?” you asked.

“to the market. i believe you haven’t seen it yet, y/n?” he asked with a tender smile.

“no, our maids do the duty of providing food…” you hesitated and stopped yul before he left. his eyes widened when he felt your hand on his chest “how are we going to leave? it’s the middle of the day, everyone will see us”

“just trust me, lady” he hummed and slid his hand to grab yours “may i?”

you nodded. yul’s gentle and smooth hand took in yours, as if scared that he’ll cause harm. blush spreading across your cheeks, you looked away and let him lead you.

seo yul was like a cat – his moves were sharp and calculated, paying attention to if someone is coming or not. in no time, you left through the back door and the garden. finding yourself in the middle of a busy street, you looked at him with wide eyes and a smile of gratitude.

“i’ll be using this route” you grinned and saw a flash of fear go through his face.

“no, don’t do that… you’ll get hurt or…” he started and you let out a gasp, drawing some passersby’s attention.

“what is that? that colorful thing? wait, yul, are those parrots?” you yelped in excitement and he couldn’t help but laugh sincerely. his features dropped when you ran off.

“wait a moment!” he giggled, adoring your excitement.

yul walked you through the market, explaing who’s selling what. the delicious smells and colors surrounded you, mouth agape as you took in all the amazing views. the young mage was stealing glances at you and how adorable you were while doing that.

“oh, the sweets!” he hummed and noticed you look that way curiously.

“can we get some?” you asked.

“of course” he grinned, hands interlocked behind his back. he followed you slowly while you already approached the seller. eyes meeting, you stood closer to him once yul arrived.

“what are we having? my treat!” you grinned “all of them look delicious…”

“my favourite are the pine pollen tea ones” he mumbled shyly, pointing at the greenish cookies.

“well then, we’ll have each one of everything” you hummed and noticed the seller’s eyes widen.

“ah, yul!”

you both turned around and saw a man with blonde hair approach you. while yul was distracted, you said something to the snack seller.

“what a beautiful lady… my name is park danggu” the blond man bowed dramatically as you stared him up and down.

“uh-uh. nice to meet you, i’m l/n y/n” you smiled and frowned, looking at yul. he just smiled.

“that’s a friend of mine” your guard explained and noticed all the snacks are already packed, waiting for you. suddenly, yul had a strange feeling ache in his heart: he did not want you to talk too much with danggu. “shall we go home?”

“oh, already?” you pouted, grabbing the bag. yul took it from you, fingers brushing against each other. blush spread on both of your cheeks. danggu smiled upon that.

“yeah, i’m busy either way. i will see you around, yul. don’t come home too late, though” danggu wiggled his brows and was off before yul could even say something.

“he’s silly” you snickered and poked his arm. yul seemed flustered.

on your way back you chatted all the time. you decided you won’t go anywhere once you’re home, so you dismissed yul to go back (only after thanking him for his company, of course).

once back at jeongjinjak, yul was surprised to see a package addressed for him.

it turned out you bought all the pine pollen tea snacks for him and had them delivered at his dorm.

the mage couldn’t help but melt and smile absentmindedly at the gesture.

for a couple of days yul was dismissed from his duties: your parents gave him some spare time and you said you’re not in the mood to leave the house. it left him pondering if something is wrong and decided to ask you if everything is alright.

the time he spent without you made him realise something: life is bland when you’re not by his side. you’re so lively and energetic, yet so adorable at the same time. he missed you and had this tingling feeling in his heart whenever you weren’t around. yul was looking forward to the day he’ll meet you again.

after finally coming back to his duties, he went right away to your chamber. it was late and dark outside but a messenger called him, saying it was urgent. the mage thought something dangerous was happening.

“y/n?” yul asked, coming into the room. there was a couple of candles lighting up the room, shadows dancing on the walls.

“yul! let’s go out!” you whisper-yelled, grabbing his hands. a pleasant warmth spread through his body before he processed your words.

“what? i thought it was an emergency and you got hurt…” he mumbled.

“no, no. i’m fine. just bored to death… are there any horses…?” you asked hesitantly.

“h-horses?” he choked out, eyes widening. you shrugged nonchalantly.

“i feel like going on a horse ride”

you are insane.

“sure, we’ll find something” he scoffed, shaking his head. he shouldn’t be doing this; none of this, at all. he’s about to sneak out with a lady he was supposed to protect and do something that could potentially harm you. which, he was here to prevent in the first place.

but he couldn’t help it! he felt like you put a spell on him, he just wasn’t able to resist.

“we shall go then, my lady” he hummed. good thing the room was dimmed, otherwise he’d see how your face reddened with a shade of ruby-alike shade of the yin and yang jade.

yul held your hand gently and helped you leave through the window. erupting into quiet giggles when you almost stepped on his feet or when you passed the peony bush where he first saw you. under the cover of dark night sky, yul led you to a nearest stallion. he looked around, making sure no one saw you.

“y/n, do you even know how–” he turned around and gasped when he saw you already on the horse.

“can we go to the pretty fields? please…” you mumbled. yul nodded slowly and hopped on a horse too, leading the way.

“we should be back before sunrise…” he mumbled. there was a look of calmness in your face, almost unfamiliar.

wind in your hair, the sound of horse hooves pleasantly clacking against the ground underneath the starry sky caused your heart to soothe. the smell of fresh grass and yul’s silhouette beautifully framed by moonlight – it was a moment that you wanted to stay in forever.

arriving at the fields, you stopped next to a small stream. the water was rustling pleasantly, hypnotizing you. yul realized that you stopped following him and turned around, looking at you. something was troubling your mind, clearly.

“yul-ah”

even in the faint light you saw his eyes widen. cute.

“yes, y/n?” he asked, voice gentle.

“i think i… no. um, actually, no. i’ve been practising ryusu! can i show you?” you asked and he nodded, locking his hands between his back.

you put your body strength on your legs, focusing to keep your moves sharp and clean. chest moving up and down to keep your breathing regular and steady. just when you thought you got it–

“y/n, i think… my heart longs for you when you’re not present but then it acts as if it was possessed whether you hold my hand… i’d rather look at you than all of the stars or beautiful ornaments” yul said, his words carried by wind.

letting out a shaky breath, you looked at him. moonlight shining on his handsome face and somewhat scared eyes.

“why did i say that…” he mumbled.

you let out a melodic laugh and ran up to him, wrapping hands around his neck. yum was startled but held you gently.

“you fool” you mumbled, smiling against the fabric of his hanbok “my heart calls out for you too. i’ve been meaning to say that for while, that’s why i needed some time alone”

“huh?”

you leaned away and gently grabbed his face, cupping his cute cheeks.

“you’re the only one who understands me, yul-ah. i bask in your warmth and kindness, your spirit makes me feel alive– can… can i kiss you? i’m out of words” you asked. yup nodded shyly, unsure what to do with his hands.

placing your lips on his plump ones, he instinctively wrapped hus hands around your waist. pulling you closer and smiling softly into the kiss.

when you felt like you were running out of your breath, he pulled away.

“you need more training though…”

a frown formed on your face and he snickered.

“with ryusu?” you asked, unable to believe he just said that.

“no– well, yes. if you train your breathing, you’ll be able to kiss longer” a smirk danced on his lips “or the other way around. fortunately for you, i can help with such matter”

suddenly his eyes widened, the flirty behaviour disappeared in a blink of an eye.

“don’t tell your parents. or my uncle. we’re kind of… breaking the rules”

“i won’t” you smiled sweetly and tip-toed to smooch his cheek.

years spend alone without friends or love, barely with your parents caused your heart to ache in a mysterious and hurtful way. but now, with yul by your side, a soothing feeling washed over it as if someone put a calming balm. a balm called love.

masterlist <3

taglist. @laylasbunbunny ,, @slytherinshua ,, @kazmura ,, @ameliesaysshoo ,, @planetkiimchi ,, @primoppang ,, @dazzlingligth

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slytherinshua · 5 months

Text

THE BEST VOICE IN DAEHO

genre. fluff. warnings. kissing & they're a little whipped for each other tbh hehe. pairing. husband!seo yul x wife!reader. wc. 1.2k. a/n. yeah i'm delusional for him..... ugh hwang minhyun and all his characters <33 i love him guys :(

“You never told me you could sing.” You said softly from the doorway, gazing fondly into the room where your husband sat, flipping through a spell book. He looked up with wide eyes, his cheeks dusting a light pink. He hadn’t realized that you had been watching him for the past 10 minutes.

“I can’t.” He shook his head, acting as if he hadn’t just been absent-mindedly humming one of your favourite songs.

You crossed your arms and walked over to where Yul was sitting, “I don’t believe you.” You insisted. Your hands rested on his shoulders, massaging them gently to work out the stress they held. Yul sighed, eyes fluttering shut.

“This is why I shouldn’t allow you in the study.” He muttered, though he only leaned into your touch, showing no signs of wanting you to leave.

“The door was left open, though? If anything, I think that was a sign that you were hoping I’d come in at some point.” A smile grew on your face at the suggestion you were making. You and Yul both knew that he had just forgotten to close it because he had been too scatterbrained. You always kissed him before he left to work on something, leaving him flustered every time.

“I was hoping to finish reviewing this book of spells before it goes to get copied and sent to Jeongjingak…” He trailed off, tilting his head up to look at you with shining eyes. You just shrugged and placed a kiss on his forehead.

“Well, I was hoping to hear more of my lovely husband’s singing that he chose to hide from me for 2 years.” You laughed as Yul sighed again. You knew all his weaknesses, one of the biggest of which was when you called him your husband. It made his heart melt whenever he was reminded of it— that he was really truly yours forever and ever.

After successfully working out the knots in his shoulder, you moved a little higher, your fingers gently starting to work on his neck. You had him more than distracted by the pleasant massage and he tilted his neck a little to the side so you could more easily work on it. You moved a little closer to press a kiss to the side of his neck, hearing the small hitch in Yul’s breath because of it made you smile.

“I guess I’ll finish this later.” Yul whispered with a small smile, closing the spellbook and placing it on top of a stack of books on the table. You laughed slightly at your victory, your breath hitting Yul’s neck and causing goosebumps to spread on it. You pressed one more long kiss to his adam’s apple before pulling away.

“I want to hear you sing. I’m sure you’ll sound good.”

“I think you should lower your expectations, my love. I’ve never studied how to sing.” He said simply, but you shook your head.

“My expectations are extremely high, so don’t disappoint me.” You joked, though it wasn’t entirely sarcastic. You had high expectations for everything your husband did, only because he seemed to be so good at anything he tried. He excelled in so many areas, and you would truly never get tired of seeing his proficiency. Whether it was spells, sword-fighting, bird whistling, writing letters, or kissing, he was an expert in all areas.

The last two, you were especially familiar with. You had received dozens of letters from Yul before you were engaged, and each one was as heart-fluttering as the first. As for kissing… Well, you had daily reminders that there was no one that kissed better than him.

You weren’t quite sure how his lips were always so pillowy soft. In your two years of marriage, that had still stayed a mystery to you. You could daydream about the way his lips moulded with yours like an elegant dance, a perfect balance where neither was overbearing the other. He always kissed you with a gentleness that had you dizzyingly falling even deeper for him.

Yul took a breath and closed his eyes, starting to softly sing the song he was before— this time from the beginning. It started out slow, deep honey-like notes blending together to create a glorious melody. His voice was soft and gentle; exactly what you would’ve expected from him. But it was somehow so much more than you could’ve imagined.

It wasn’t just soft, it was rich as well. As the song progressed to its chorus and the notes climbed higher and higher, he didn’t falter. His high notes sounded just as clear and perfect as his low notes did, and you quickly fell into the trance his voice had created. You wanted to hear him sing forever now that you had discovered this hidden treasure.

The song came to an end far too quickly, though you were sure he had been singing for at least four minutes. But four minutes just wasn’t enough— you craved more of the intoxicatingly sweet sound of his voice. He blinked open his eyes and smiled shyly at you.

“I hope it didn’t disappoint you?” He asked, still a little embarrassed about singing in front of you for the very first time. Of all the people on the earth, he wanted to impress you the most. He knew you were already his, and even if he failed at something it wouldn’t change your image of him, but the satisfaction of pleasing you was something he never got enough of.

“I didn’t know I married the man with the best voice in Daeho.”

Yul flushed at your comment, “I’m sure I don’t have the best voice in Daeho.”

“Well, it’s all subjective isn’t it? And I meant it when I said it.” You clarified and leaned a little closer, “Can you sing for me again?”

Yul couldn’t possibly say no to you, especially not when you were looking at him with such soft love-stricken eyes. He seemed to get lost in them all too easily, glimmering as if the entire night sky of stars was captured in your irises. He leaned in slowly, not even realizing that he was drifting closer and closer to you until he felt your breath on his lips. He closed his eyes again and quickly captured your lips with his.

If it was anyone else, he would’ve been bothered that his work had been interrupted.

If it was anyone else, he wouldn’t have believed that they were telling the truth when they said he had the best voice.

And if it was anyone else, he wouldn’t have felt so shaken with the warm feeling of butterflies and comfort and adoration and love.

But it was you, so Yul didn’t particularly mind you distracting him; in fact, he couldn’t deny that he even liked it. Especially when it ended like this: with his lips on yours, the sweet taste of your lips ending up on his by the end of it.

“Of course I can sing more… Whatever you’d like.”

↳ k-drama taglist: @yeonjuns-redhair,, @wolfmoonmusic,, @edensgardenn

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marvelous-llama · 9 months

Text

NU'EST recs

most of the mentioned works is 18+ NSFW, MINORS DNI

tumblr is based on reblogs not likes, so please reblog and comment under works you like. Show love to the authors and appreciate their hard work

<<next chapters

pls don´t hesitate to hmu, if any of mentioned links doesn´t work or you have suggestions for more fics... thank you so much for all the love and comments

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#nu'est #nu'est recs #nu'est smut #aron #aaron kwak #aaron x reader #jr #kim jonghyeon #jonghyeon x reader #baekho #kang dongho #baekho x reader #minhyun #hwang minhyun #minhyun x reader #ren #choi mingi #ren x reader

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renjunphile · 2 years

Text

Kiss Me Lifeless | Jeongcheol

⇢ word count: 8.4k ⇢ pairing: svt's choi seungcheol / s.coups x yoon jeonghan ⇢ tags&warnings: exes to lovers!au, non-idol!au, fluff, some angst, one kind of dubcon kiss ⇢ synopsis: choi seungcheol spots yoon jeonghan first across the room in a basement bar. it's been 3 years and seungcheol's words and thoughts are all tied up. ⇢ notes: i am jeongcheol trash!! i really didn't know how to end this but i was desperate to send this out into the world!! maybe one day i'll re-do the ending, but for now, i hope you enjoy everything else :) as always, likes and comments are appreciated<3

i. it's my birthday

Seungcheol spots him first, one arm leaning on the bar top and the other swirling a whiskey gently as he talked animatedly to another taller, older man. Since when did Jeonghan drink whiskey? Seungcheol thinks to himself before scoffing; it's been 3 long and arduous years and everything he knew about the still-blonde boy had probably changed.

The lighting in the bar is dim for the moody ambience, but it seems like Jeonghan is glowing amongst the dark surfaces clad in a cream shirt and a cream blazer. Seungcheol's throat feels like its closing in on itself as he swallows deeply, eyes still trained on the man. How could this have happened?

"Seungcheol?" his coworker tries to catch his attention beside him when he noticed that Seungcheol had stopped listening to his rambles, "Seungcheol!"

Snapping out of his trance, Seungcheol reluctantly tore his eyes from the men at the bar as if he was scared they'd disappear the next time he looked back. Seungcheol looked across apologetically at his coworker, "Sorry Hyun."

"Who's that at the bar? Are you interested in one of them?" Minhyun inquires cheekily, nudging him lightly, "You should go up to them."

Seungcheol debates in his mind for a quick second whether to spill his secrets to his friend before deciding quickly against it. No need to trauma dump on a guy on his 5th shot of the night.

"It's no one," Seungcheol mumbles, "You know, we should get going. It's getting late and your wife is expecting you home."

Minhyun grumbles, but agrees, "I hate how responsible you are. It's a Friday night, but you're right. How are you getting home? I'm calling a taxi!"

"I'll get a taxi too. Shame you live on the other side of the city, Hyun. You can go before me; I just need to grab my things in the coatroom," Seungcheol urges, hoping for a quick escape.

Minhyun nods along, giving his colleague a quick hug goodbye before making his way to the exit. Seungcheol exhales deeply and looks out through the corner of his eye. Jeonghan and the man were still there, now joined by a shorter female.

All Seungcheol had to do was make his way discreetly to the coatroom, which happened to be in the direction of the bar. It was fine, right? Jeonghan was surrounded by people and there was no way he'd pick out Seungcheol moving quickly if he was engrossed in conversation.

Seungcheol huffs, gets up and trods towards the side-room determinedly. He sighs in relief when he makes it in one piece before handing the ticket to the worker and being handed his coat and satchel from work. Okay, all he had to do now was make it to the exit in a discreet fashion and it would all be okay and he could forget that this night ever-

"Seungcheol?"

Seunghceol's heart leapt in yards and bounds as his stomach dropped. Would he be a terrible person if he ignored the calling and just continued on his merry way? Would that hurt more or less?

While Seungcheol was debating and hosting an inner monologue, Jeonghan had wrestled out of the hurdle he was in and approached the man, placing a light hand on his shoulders, "Seungcheol?" he called again.

Seungcheol turned around with an awkward smile, meeting the soft (and slightly red) eyes of his former lover, "Oh, Yoon Jeonghan! Fancy seeing you here!"

Jeonghan spluttered as he looked around and assessed Seungcheol, "W-what are you doing here?"

"I just had some drinks with my coworkers. They all already left," Seungcheol tried to explain, pretending oblivious to the actual meaning of his words.

Alas, Jeonghan was a persistent one, "No, Cheol. In Seoul. What are you doing in Seoul? Coworkers? Don't you work in Daegu?"

Seungcheol's lips pulled up into another awkward smile and laugh, "Ah, no. I got a promotion that came with a relocation to headquarters. Here in Seoul. This was my welcome drinks gathering, though I started two months ago."

"Two months ago?" Jeonghan's eyebrows converged into a furrow, "No one told me you were coming back."

"Sorry," Seungcheol breathed out, "I kind of didn't tell anyone. Wanted to settle in and see how it'd go."

"No one at all?"

Seungcheol scratched the back of his neck, "No. Look, I don't wanna keep you from your people. I should really get going but it was nice to see you, Jeonghan-"

Jeonghan took a hold of his wrist and frowned, "Seungcheol, don't go yet. I have so many questions to ask. I-"

"Do you think that's the best?" Seungcheol interrupts gently.

A look of slight hurt and disappointment washes over the angelic features of the man in front of him, making Seungcheol regret the words that came out of his mouth.

Jeonghan bit his lip as he looked at his ex and it was probably the alcohol that prompted him to be so bold with his next words, "I missed you, Cheol. I wanna know how you've been!"

Seungcheol's eyes widened at the confession, his neck flushing in a deep red, "Oh. Don't you have someone at home that would object to that?"

He doesn't. Seungcheol knows he doesn't.

"No," Jeonghan mumbles, "Can't you stay a bit longer? I'm just with my coworkers; we go out for drinks all the time."

Seungcheol looks at his watch and then at the man. How futile; he'd spend a trillion years ignoring his duties just to spend time with his lover. Or he would have. He doesn't know the right thing to do anymore.

"I should get going," Seungcheol utters reluctantly.

Jeonghan's demeanour drops visibly at the rejection, "Do you have someone waiting for you?"

He doesn't. Jeonghan knows he doesn't. Or at least he didn't last time he asked.

"No," Seungcheol quickly corrects, "It's just- I don't know if this is right. It's been a while and-"

"It's my birthday," Jeonghan blurts out suddenly.

Seungcheol pales. The days in Seoul had all blurred together and he couldn't tell you what day it was. It probably would have taken him the morning to have realised that, but he guessed it was a bit past midnight on October 4.

"Oh, happy birthday, Jeonghan-ah."

Jeonghan face palms and exhales, "What I mean to say is that I'm having a birthday party tonight. As in later in the evening once the sun comes up and then goes down again. You should come."

The invitation truly took Seungcheol by surprise, "Look, Jeonghan. I don't know if that's such a good idea. I haven't seen everyone in ages and it's a bit weird for me to drop in like that."

Jeonghan shook his head vehemently, "No, no. It's perfectly fine. They'd be so happy to see you and I know they miss you so much and everyone's coming and- and Jisoo!"

"Jisoo?"

"Jisoo! Jisoo's flying into the airport in the morning and Seokmin is collecting him and I know you haven't seen him in 3 years so you need to come!" Jeonghan urged. When did he get this brave? He was truly surprising himself.

Ah, Jisoo. Their missing puzzle piece and the 3rd in their trio. Seungcheol and Jeonghan had met the American on the first day of college and they all instantly clicked and everything fell into place. He was their brother, their wingman and their platonic soulmate. Well, that was when Jeonghan and Seungcheol thought each other to be their romantic soulmate.

"Please, Cheol. It won't be awkward! Now that you're back in the city, we can all be friends again!" Jeonghan clapped. He was always the more optimistic one and that was what hurt Seungcheol when he walked away from Jeonghan's pleading tries of 'we can make this work!' 3 years ago.

The defences came bouldering down when Jeonghan tugged on Seungcheol's sleeve and pulled his angel eyes, "Please?"

"Fine."

The slightly tipsy boy squealed in delight and squeezed Seungcheol's wrist, making his blush deeper in colour.

"What's your number? I need to text you my address."

Oh hell, Seungcheol thought to himself. He was so, so screwed.

------

ii. does it hurt to say you miss me too?

Seungcheol thought Jeonghan's reception to him would be cold at worst, reserved at best upon seeing him for the first time in 3 years. When he awoke in the morning in the sweet confines of his own bed, he was quickly overcome with thoughts from the night previous. How in the world was Jeonghan so nice to him when Seungcheol walked away so easily all those years ago?

That's what Seungcheol loved about Jeonghan in the first place anyway. He was warm, inviting and so lovely to everyone he met, despite being the cheekiest boy with his friends. Jeonghan loved to tease and he loved to trick and he loved to play games, but when it came down to it, Jeonghan was dependable and caring.

Seungcheol had been pondering over the past 3 years repeatedly why he left Jeonghan. When he was all alone in his flat in the centre of Daegu, he'd look over to the other side of the bed and wonder how it would feel to have Jeonghan occupying the other side. When he was having dinner alone on the couch, he would dream of Jeonghan sitting cross-legged beside him, slurping up his food despite complaining that Seungcheol was a terrible cook.

There was absolutely no denying that Seungcheol missed him. He never stopped missing him. But he was the one to walk away, so it was not his choice and privilege to come back and beg for forgiveness no matter how hard he wanted to.

3 years ago, they had just graduated from college and living together in a studio apartment on a 6-month lease. They were coming up towards the end of it and all they had done since then was fight and fight and fight. It had baffled them both considering they lived together in their last 3 years of college so why were they fighting now? Jeonghan was pushing hours at the marketing office he had landed a position at, to try and impress his coworkers, meanwhile, Seungcheol was working at the convenience store every night and most days while scrambling to find a job in the field he actually wanted to work in: music. They would work and work and come home to each other tired and exhausted, which would just lead to fights. Seungcheol hated how he couldn't provide more for his lover and Jeonghan detested that Seungcheol was never present at home. Eventually, when an offer to work at a music studio in Daegu came, Seungcheol took it and left the next day.

In his wake, he left behind a trail of disappointed friends, but most importantly, a heartbroken Jeonghan who had pleaded him to stay. Seungcheol had a lot of regrets. Not answering Jeonghan's or his friend's call for months being one of them. He was weak and he was a coward and if he could turn back time, he would. Losing Jeonghan was the worst thing that ever happened to him.

A call on his phone tore him away from his memories and only then did Seungcheol realise he was crying. It was Joshua, surprisingly.

"Shua?"

"Cheol! Guess what? I'm in Korea! Surprise! I'm here for a week and a half and I was thinking I'd come down to Daegu to visit you in a few days or you could come up to Seoul? I really miss you and I just landed and Seokmin picked me up," Joshua babbled happily.

When Jeonghan and Seungcheol broke up, Seungcheol had lost touch with mostly everyone. He still spoke to Jihoon often due to their musical ties, which by extension meant he was still in contact with Soonyoung, who never left his fiance's side. Other than that, Seungcheol only maintained regular contact with Jisoo, his very best friend. The only thing was that Jisoo never brought up Jeonghan unless Seungcheol asked (which he did so every year on his birthday, but reluctantly at that).

Jisoo never had the trouble of having to split his time between Jeonghan and Seungcheol because he left soon after their graduation to do his masters in his hometown and stayed there after. Jisoo had no problem keeping in contact via texts and calls with either of them.

"Ah, sorry Shua. I'm really busy with work. I don't know how much time I have," Seungcheol plays off regretfully. He knew he'd see his far away friend later on in the evening but Seungcheol wanted to have some fun.

"Oh," Joshua sighed, "I get it man. I should have told you sooner; sorry. I have some news to tell you, but I see Seokmin now so I'll tell you later or tomorrow."

"Bye Shua."

The call clicks to an end and Seungcheol finds himself face to face with his lock screen that only has one notification on it from an unknown number.

[unknown] hey, it's han. praying you gave me the right number, otherwise dick move. my address is [x] and you can come like at 6 or something. no need to bring anything.

Seungcheol's phone buzzes again and he's so glad he doesn't have his read receipts on.

[unknown] oh, and good morning cheol :)

Seungcheol takes a few minutes to reply, not wanting to seem to eager.

seungcheol i'd never give you a fake! thanks for the invite. let me know if you change your mind about me coming. shua called me just now and i rejected him offering to come to daegu so don't tell him i'm coming

seungcheol good morning jeonghan

jeonghan no smiley face for me? it's my birthday! :( but i won't tell shua. i guess i won't tell anybody and it can be a surprise. i'm sure they'll be happy to see you

seungcheol i'm sorry. happy birthday again jeonghan :)

seungcheol but why are you being so nice to me?

jeonghan don't interrogate me, it's my birthday !!

jeonghan can a man not be nice to his friend?

seungcheol are we friends?

jeonghan can a man not be nice to his *ex-boyfriend? hey, the word friend is there

seungcheol so is the word ex

jeonghan i miss you, that's why

seungcheol what are you expecting from me?

jeonghan all i'm expecting from you is to come to my party. that's all, seungcheol

jeonghan does it hurt to say you miss me too?

seungcheol kind of

--------

iii. no hard feelings

He's nervous. More nervous than the time he met Daegu's finest- Min Yoongi- and wrote a couple of verses with him. He's trembling on Jeonghan's doorstep, hyperaware of the noise coming from the other side of the door. It sounded like there were people there already.

While Jeonghan said to not bring anything, it was only the polite thing to turn up with at least some food, so he was gripping a bag containing an assortment of cakes. He was pretty sure his knuckles were white and stripped of blood supply.

After a few deep breaths and a mumbled pep talk to himself, Seungcheol mustered up the courage to knock at the door. His whole body tensed when the noise cut abruptly and someone was bounding towards the door.

"Seungcheol-hyung?" it was Chan that had opened the door, a look of perplexity overcoming his features. Jeonghan was bounding towards him worriedly, as if he had meant to grab the door first, "Seungcheol-hyung, what are you doing here?"

At the call of his name, many more footsteps came rushing at the door, uttering his name in confusion. Great, Seungcheol thought to himself, all 12 of them had arrived and he was the freak in a glass box.

"Ah, let me explain," Jeonghan sighed dejectedly as he pushed everyone back into the living room. Seungcheol didn't dare to look any of them in the eyes nor speak a single word.

Everyone fell back in their previous positions, though now with eyes trained on their long-lost friend. That was an exaggeration- Seungcheol said happy birthday to everyone every year and kept up small conversations over social media.

"Yeah, you better," Seungkwan piped up. Seungkwan had been the one to maintain some kind of coldness towards Seungcheol, being overprotective and emotional. Seungkwan highly disagreed with what Seungcheol did and he made that known to him.

"Is this why you rejected me coming to Daegu?" Joshua was the only one to approach Seungcheol and envelop him in a tight hug, "I missed you, man."

Seungcheol could only just say back the same thing before Jeonghan began explaining.

"We met at the bar last night. We were both with our coworkers. I told him to come so he could see you all again. No hard feelings," Jeonghan clapped decisively at their college friends.

"What about you, Hyung?" Mingyu directed at Jeonghan, "No hard feelings?"

Seungcheol froze up.

"It's been 3 years, Mingyu. Time heals all, so be nice to your hyung. I know you all miss him," Jeonghan stares pointedly around at the boys with sheepish faces, "I know you stop talking about him every time I walk into a room, so here's my present for you. On my birthday."

"Gosh, you're such an angel," Jihoon drawls from beside his fiance before grinning at his stoic friend, "Man, loosen up. We're still your friends."

Seungcheol sighs and his face couldn't help but transform into a grin. Jeonghan took the bag from his fingertips with a whispered thank you, before disappearing into a foreign room.

"This is crazy," Seokmin utters, "I did not expect this."

Joshua has an arm around Seungcheol's shoulders and leads him to a space on one of the two couches between Minghao and Hansol. Thank God for Jisoo because Seungcheol doesn't know if he can trust his legs.

He was nervous, but he couldn't pinpoint exactly why. He had known his friends for years, some since college and some before. No one seemed like they actually hated him and no one was jumping on him beating him bloody and bruised. So it was good on that front.

But he was in Jeonghan's apartment. On Jeonghan's birthday. On Jeonghan's couch.

What did that mean?

"Are you back in Seoul for good, Hyung?" Minghao asks, perched on a dining room chair while swirling his usual red wine in a glass.

"Yeah, I got a promotion. They relocated me to their Seoul headquarters," Seungcheol explains.

"Then why didn't you tell any of us?" Junhui frowns.

"I don't know," he shrugs, "Was scared."

Seungcheol's breath hitches when Jeonghan returns to the room with the cakes he brought now laid on two plates that he sets on the coffee table. Seungcheol looks around. It was spacious and definitely much nicer than the apartment they had shared back in the day.

"Nice, huh?" Wonwoo claps Seungcheol's back as he walks past, "Jeonghan-hyung is rich now."

"I'm not," Jeonghan scolds with a faint smirk, before looking over at Seungcheol, "I worked hard for this. I worked a lot since I had nothing else preoccupying my time."

Ouch, that felt like a dig.

"Ah well, congrats Jeonghan," Seungcheol says politely. Jeonghan settles himself on the arm of the other loveseat that Soonyoung and Jihoon were occupying.

A silence falls upon them and Seungcheol cringes internally. Maybe it really wasn't the best idea to come.

Chan clears his throat before looking around and assessing the atmosphere, "So, drinks?"

There was a collective sigh of relief.

------

iv. these chickens won't pay for themselves

Seungcheol doesn't see Jeonghan for a while after the party. It takes a few weeks in fact for the two to reunite. The party had passed by quickly and went the same as always: Mingyu would get drunk the fastest despite his huge stature and Wonwoo would drag him out first (of course, accompanied with screaming, kicking, crying and whining from the giant), Soonyoung would get drunk next and would begin making out with Jihoon who would roll his eyes but secretly enjoy it, Seokmin and Seungkwan would load up the karaoke machine before they even got tipsy and sing from their hearts until they got a noise complaint and Jeonghan- well, Jeonghan would get drunk and cry.

That was when it got awkward.

At Jeonghan's first sniffle and wobble of the lip, Joshua had dragged him out into the square kitchen with an unreadable glance.

"Oh, you know that news I had to tell you?" Joshua began, "Well, I feel like I should tell you now, but I'm moving back to Seoul too!"

A grin became of Seungcheol's face as he hugged his best friend, "Oh my God? How come?"

"Well after two years of working in that drab company," Joshua rolls his eyes, "I found a job here! I'm basically here this week to meet with the company and sort some things out, then I'll be back two weeks after I leave! Isn't this great? All of us in the same city again?"

"Yeah," Seungcheol breaths, "No, yeah, it's great. Feels just like the old times."

A pitchy yell/son cuts through the apartment.

"Speaking of the old times," Joshua began, "I think it's best for you to go home. I don't trust Han in this state."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you know how Jeonghan cries when he's drunk. His topic back in university used to be his stress from schoolwork and his family, but the boys have told me that now, he cries a-"

"He cries about me?" a pang shoots to Seungcheol's heart.

"When he's drunk," Joshua adds, "So I think you should go home in case he says anything he doesn't want you to hear. We can take care of him."

It was useless to protest. There was no reason for him to stay anyway, so he quickly left without saying goodbye to the boys in the living room in fear of being around Jeonghan, who was sprawled out on the floor like a starfish, for too long.

Anyway, the next time he sees Jeonghan was at the supermarket which apparently was a good distance between both Jeonghan and Seungcheol's apartments.

Again, Seungcheol spots Jeonghan first in the dairy aisle, looking at all the different types of cheeses. Seungcheol smiles to himself briefly, remembering the younger's affection for cheese despite being lactose intolerant.

He debates whether to call out for him or not, but figures it doesn't hurt to, "Old habits die hard, huh?"

An adorable yelp comes out of Jeonghan's mouth as he jumps in surprise, but relaxes and then stiffens when he sees Seungcheol, "Oh it's you. Hi Seungcheol. What are you doing here?"

Seungcheol motioned over to his half-full cart, "Grocery shopping. You come here often?"

Wow, Seungcheol. So smooth. As if that wasn't the most overused line in the history of all conversation starters.

"I usually shop on Friday nights but I had a day off today," Jeonghan says while placing a packet of mozzarella into his cart, "Jisoo told me you're picking him up at the airport in a few days."

"Oh, yeah. He was going to get Seokmin to pick him up but I offered. Should have just let them do their thing."

Jeonghan scoffs fondly, "After 6 years, they're still as oblivious as ever."

Seungcheol smiles, "Yeah. Yeah, they are."

Jeonghan stares down awkwardly at his shopping cart and Seungcheol knew it was time to exit the conversation.

"Well, I should go. These uh, chickens, won't pay for themselves," Seungcheol flushes awkwardly, avoiding Jeonghan's eyes before moving away. God, he was such a mess around Jeonghan, even now.

He moves out of the aisle without looking at his former lover again and reaches the drinks aisle before he stops and scolds himself in his mind for being such a disaster.

Back in the dairy aisle, Jeonghan smiles to himself.

-----

v. it's like a quadruple date!

It takes another 2 weeks for their paths to cross again. Even though they have each other's numbers on their phones, neither dared to reach out again after the initial conversation on Jeonghan's birthday.

This time, they were the first ones to arrive at the restaurant where they were having a group dinner.

Seungcheol had waited in his car for a little bit when he checked the time and it was still 5 minutes until their reservation time. Not everyone was coming, as far as he knew, but he knew Jisoo, Seokmin, Jihoon and Soonyoung to come at the very least. If everyone maintained the same traits since college, then at least 80% of them would be late and Seungcheol knew this, but as soon as the digital numbers on his dashboard turned 7, he couldn't help but to head inside and wait at the table.

It was 7:05 by the time Jeonghan arrived, hair perfectly fluffy and his outfit baggy as always. It took 3 blinks from Seungcheol to realise Jeonghan was wearing a hoodie that Seungcheol had been looking for for 3 years. He decided against saying anything about it.

"Oh, I didn't know you were coming," Jeonghan said casually, sliding into the booth around the circular table.

Seungcheol gulped, "I didn't know you were coming either. Is this a problem?"

"No," Jeonghan said quite quickly, "No it isn't. I just didn't know."

A silence fell quickly between them and Jeonghan busied himself with the menu. Seungcheol visibly deflated at this action. They had been coming to the restaurant since the start of their college days and Jeonghan for the duration of those 4 years had gotten the same exact dish each and every time; Seungcheol found it hard to believe he'd had a change of heart.

"What, you don't get your spaghetti anymore?" Seungcheol attempted to tease, but his tone came out more accusing.

"I'm surprised you remember," Jeonghan placed the menu down softly, turning his face to meet Seungcheol's eyes. That made him nervous.

Before he could reply with something like, 'I remember everything about you', Jisoo and Seokmin came bounding over to the table giggling together in their own little world.

"Oh! You two are here," Seokmin smirked, "Did you come together?"

Jeonghan vehemently shook his head, "No, no. Seungcheol came first. I just got here."

Jisoo matched his companion's expression, "Sure, okay."

"Why don't we talk about why you two came together?" Seungcheol fired in defence, eager to take the attention away from them.

"Jisoo-hyung doesn't have his car yet, so I picked him up," Seokmin said as if it were the most obvious statement in the world.

As if it were like the old times, Seungcheol and Jeonghan sent each other an amused and unconvinced look before realising what they had done and quickly looked away.

Eventually, Jihoon and Soonyoung turned up and increased the distance between Seungcheol and Jeonghan and distracted the table with more updates about their wedding plans. Apparently, they had decided on a mocha cake for the middle tier of their 3 tiered cake and that Soonyoung had found his tuxedo.

"It's still a year away," Jihoon mumbled every time Soonyoung had a lightbulb moment of more updates he had to tell the group, but everyone knew that Jihoon was just as excited as his fiance to finally get married after years and years.

15 minutes in, Seungcheol was surprised to see Mingyu and Wonwoo come hand in hand walking with no care towards the table.

"We've already ordered," Joshua laughed. Those two were always the most late and that was only down to Mingyu and Mingyu only. He got distracted easily.

Mingyu took a seat next to Seungcheol and looked around before his face lit up and he delivered his next sentence in the most oblivious and innocent manner, "Oh my God! It's like a quadruple date!"

Jeonghan almost launched himself across the table to strangle the tall man.

vi. strawberry soju

Eventually, New Year's Eve comes around and Seungcheol feels like he's been in the city for years. He's truly settled into his job and he'd regained the same relationship with his friends. Sure, there was a large part missing, but even having Jeonghan in close proximity just by being in the same friendship group was enough.

Because they were all adults with full-time jobs and responsibilities, they weren't up to their same college antics of partying and getting all sweaty and drunk in a random house. Of course, they were all down to go to the club, but by general consensus, they decided on just a simple gathering at someone's house with chicken and beer.

It was at Jihoon and Soonyoung's house, which was where most gatherings were since everyone lived in apartments and the house was the place where they were least likely to get a noise complaint. Plus they always had a stocked drinks fridge.

Everyone had been there for a while, enjoying each other's company and getting slightly buzzed on beer and satiated with endless chicken. The karaoke had been set up again, but Junhui and Minghao had found the Chinese ballads section and were slumped on the couch on the verge of tears singing their hearts out. While everyone found their source of amusement in this, the two Chinese devils had found their source by next forcing everyone to tackle a Chinese song.

Seungcheol was curled up with a beer can next to Chan, who was babbling away happily about the new class he was teaching at Soonyoung's dance studio and how the kids were so talented. Seungcheol adored Chan's company, but eventually, Seungcheol excused himself to the toilet.

"It's down that corridor on the right," Jihoon pointed out.

"But hurry back!" Joshua called after him, "It's midnight in 2 minutes and we're counting down!"

It was always their favourite thing to do to count down as a group and it ended with everyone taking a shot together before turning to their partners.

Seungcheol rushed down the hallway that took him out of sight from the party in the living room and he quickly did his business and exited, but not before giving his face a quick splash with cold water to focus himself. He had been distracted all night by the sneaky glances that Jeonghan had been giving him. He kept catching the blonde's eye while in mid-conversation with someone else, and each time their eyes met, Seungcheol's heart would beat faster and faster.

"Oh shit!" Seungcheol yelled as he exited.

Jeonghan was leaning up against the wall outside the toilet, arms folded and a leg propping himself up. It was dark in the corridor as Seungcheol hadn't been bothered to turn on the lights, thinking his escapade to the bathroom to be a short and energy-saving one. The only light illuminating Jeonghan's angular features was the bathroom light that Seungcheol was about to switch off, but dimmed as the door shut behind him a smidge. He should turn that light off after, he thought to himself, but for now, he let it brighten the hallway.

"Do you need the toilet too?" Seungcheol offered awkwardly to the other boy.

"No," Jeonghan merely shook his head.

"Were you looking for me?"

Jeonghan shrugged, "I guess so."

"How come?"

"Why don't you text me?"

Seungcheol was taken aback by his directness and found it hard to string together the words to reply, "Uh, I'm sorry? I didn't know if you were open to that."

"Do you not want me anymore?" It was definitely the alcohol talking. Jeonghan was very honest when it got into his system.

"Jeonghan-ah," Seungcheol trailed off before being interrupted harshly.

"It's a yes or no question, Seungcheol."

Well, this was not how he pictured his New Years' Eve going. Seungcheol swallowed hard before letting the words fall out of his mouth, "I do, Han. But we're not together anymore. I broke your heart and I didn't come back for 3 years. It's not that simple."

"You were a coward," Jeonghan half-spat, "You didn't call or text or give me a chance to beg. Cause I would have, Seungcheol. I would have begged. I would have moved to Daegu and tried to fix our relationship if you even slightly implied it. I would have told you that I wish you took me with you."

Seungcheol flinched at the harsh words, but he knew them to be the truth, "I know. I was a coward. I thought our relationship had hit a dead end and I thought that you didn't want anything to do with me anymore. I thought I was giving you an out."

"You were giving yourself an out," Jeonghan snarked back, before his features melted, "But I'm asking you if you want to try again. Cause I'm here now and you're here and we're still single and no one I meet has ever lived up to you-"

"5! 4!"

The collective counting from the boys filtered into the dark hallway. Jeonghan's eyes were boring into Seungcheol's soul.

There were no words to describe Seungcheol's spinning head. He was elated, ecstatic, happy, but at the same time so confused.

"It's not so simple, Han," he repeated, "We need to properly talk about what happened."

"3! 2!"

"I still love you."

"1!"

Seungcheol blinked once and suddenly he felt hands gripping his shirt and pulling him close, and he tasted strawberry soju on his tongue. The familiar taste took him straight back to college and all he could remember was lovingly wrestling a blond boy against every surface to exist and when their lips would meet after whispered endearments and happy laughter, Seungcheol would taste strawberry soju.

Jeonghan's lips on his were hesitant as if waiting to be invited in. Seungcheol found his arm snaking around the slim waist of his once lover as he deepened their kiss and savoured in the familiarity of Jeonghan's kiss.

The noise of cheering cut through the silence and Jeonghan and Seungcheol pulled away and occupied the hallway with their laboured breaths.

Seungcheol was confused as to why he felt so conflicted. There Jeonghan was, asking for another chance when it was him that had his heart broken. It was Seungcheol who had left him regretfully, but it pained him to think Jeonghan was the one to say that he still loved him. How could Jeonghan love a man who broke his heart?

Seungcheol could only do one thing. He fled.

vii. i hate you

3 AM a few days later, Seungcheol was awoken from his deep slumber by the sound of his ringtone filling his dark room. He had initially thought it was his alarm waking him for another long day at work, but a quick glance out to the sky told him it was still nighttime, or at least the early hours of the morning.

Seungcheol picked up without even reading the name of the caller, "Hello?"

"Oh my God, Hyung! Thank God you picked up! Sorry to wake you up."

Seungkwan's distressed voice filled his ears and Seungcheol frowned, "Kwannie? Is everything okay? Do you need me?"

"Yeah, but it's kind of a difficult situation," Seungkwan began, "You know how me and Jeonghan, Jun, Hao, Hansol and Chan went out clubbing tonight?"

"Yes, on a Sunday night. I remember," Seungcheol almost chuckled to himself before remembering the panic that Seungkwan was speaking with, "Why? Is everyone okay?"

"Well, Jeonghan-hyung is crying," Seungkwan deadpanned, and for effect, directed the microphone over to a familiar wailing.

"You know he does that. Just stroke his hair and let him cuddle you. He'll fall asleep or throw up eventually," he recalled easily. He'd had enough practice to forget how to take care of drunk Jeonghan.

"We tried, hyung," it seemed as if Hansol had snatched the phone from Seungkwan, "But Jeonghan-hyung keeps crying and he says he wants to see you and he literally refuses to get up off the floor. He always cries about you, but he got really drunk tonight. He's been saying something about you running away and he won't stop crying. We got kicked out of the club."

Seungcheol's heart dropped, "Oh. Do you want me to come pick him up? I don't know how happy he'll be in the morning but I guess if he's asking for me... Anyway, I'll come now. Text me your address. Is everyone okay?"

"We all pretty much sobered up from it," Hansol sighed, "Thanks, Hyung. Please come quickly."

Seungcheol only threw on a hoodie and joggers and ran out of his apartment in his slides, heart beating and adrenaline pumping. Thankfully, they weren't too far away from his apartment and the roads were mostly empty. Sure, he may have broken a few speed limits, but his Jeonghan was on the floor crying for him.

He pulled up near the group on the kerb and quickly got out to assess the situation. Jeonghan was still on the floor cross-legged, leaning on Junhui's legs while Minghao paced in front and Chan was trying to comfort the poor man.

"Hyung!" Seungkwan called out, tone laced with relief, "Thanks for coming. We really couldn't help this time."

Seungcheol's eyes softened at the boy on the floor who was sobbing into his sweater paws. Seungcheol bent down and reached eye level with Jeonghan, "Hannie, I'm gonna need you to get off the floor."

Jeonghan's eyes snapped forwards to him,m and it seemed that at that moment, anger coursed through him. Jeonghan started pounding with his fists on Seungcheol's chest and thankfully, he was drunk so they didn't really hurt physically. His state, though- that hurt Seungcheol to see him cry like that.

"What are you doing here?" Jeonghan cried out, "I hate you! You always fucking leave!"

Tears welled up in Seungcheol's eyes as he wrapped his arms around the boy, encouraging him to stand up. Seungcheol didn't dare to meet the eyes of his friends who were definitely staring in shock at the scene playing out in front of them.

"I know Han. I know. I'm sorry for leaving and for running away," Seungcheol cooed. He had managed to wrestle the boy into standing, but his arms were still wrapped around Jeonghan, "Come on, Han. Let's get you home."

"I hate you," Jeonghan kept repeating. His beatings on Seungcheol's chest were reduced to taps as Jeonghan's cries faded down slightly. That was definitely progress, "I hate you so much."

"Do you know where he lives?" Minghao came up behind Seungcheol, "His keys are in his pocket."

"I got him, guys. Thanks for trying. Get home safe," Seungcheol murmured to his friends. Jeonghan was thrashing in his arms, but Seungcheol refused to let go, "Can someone open my passenger door?"

Junhui quickly opened the door and Seungcheol scooped up Jeonghan into a bridal style position in order to place him inside the car. It was definitely easier said than done because Jeonghan was very drunk and still crying a lot, but he managed to get it done with the help of Hansol who made sure Jeonghan's head didn't bump into the top of the car.

Seungcheol eventually got into the driver's seat after waving his friends away and sighed at the man who was still claiming to hate him. He put Jeonghan through a lot of pain and this was one of his first manifestations of it in front of Seungcheol. Jeonghan had always acted so indifferent and eager to get back together.

He reached over to secure the seatbelt over Jeonghan and quickly drove to his apartment. After a few more law breaks, they made it in one piece and Seungcheol was dragging a still crying Jeonghan into an elevator and encouraging him to take out his keys. In the middle of his babbles, he complied and dropped them onto the ground, but at least Seungcheol could open his apartment.

Jeonghan's cries echoed even louder in his apartment and it took 3 doors for Seungcheol to find his bedroom. As he expected, there was a glass of water and some hangover pills on the nightstand already. Jeonghan always prepared in the same way before a night out because he knew how he'd get. In the earlier years of their relationship in college, Seungcheol had been the one to prepare the water and medicine on the nightstand for Jeonghan, until Jeonghan himself caught on and began doing it for himself.

"Hannie," Seungcheol cooed again, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry for hurting you."

"I love you so much, Choi Seungcheol," Jeonghan had cried out, "And I hate you for that. I was doing better and you came back and ruined it all."

Seungcheol managed to force a few gulps of water into Jeonghan's system and to take off Jeonghan's shoes and socks and he wrestled the drunk man into the bed. He turned on the fan as Jeonghan was fully clothed and was bound to get hot during his slumber, but Seungcheol was in no position to strip him.

"I know Han. I'm sorry. You need to sleep. Please get some rest."

Jeonghan's cries turned into whimpers as he buried himself into his sheets, "I love you, Cheol. Please stay."

Seungcheol sighed deeply as he pushed back Jeonghan's damp hair and placed a kiss on his forehead, "I'm not leaving again, Hannie."

"No, tonight," Jeonghan mumbled, "Please stay with me."

Seungcheol hummed, running his fingers through Jeonghan's hair repeatedly as he knew that to be the best way to coax him into sleep. He was perched on the edge of Jeonghan's bed, and as Jeonghan stopped moving around, Seungcheol was able to look around the room.

It was pretty plain. A bed in the centre, a desk with his gaming setup, a wardrobe in the corner and two nightstands on either side of the bed.

Seungcheol's eyes focused on a picture frame behind the water and when he processed the image, he felt tears gather on his lash line, ready to fall at the next blink.

It was a picture from their graduation day in their robes. Jisoo was grinning in the middle with an arm wrapped around both of his best friends. Jeonghan was on the left, a bouquet of flowers in his hands, but he was in mid-laugh, facing to the right where Seungcheol was grinning back at him affectionately.

It was the photo that Seungcheol and Jeonghan had displayed in the living room of their shared apartment, but Seungcheol hadn't realised that Jeonghan had kept it, let alone keep it on his nightstand. Had he had it up all these years.

He was snapped out of his daze by Jeonghan's snoring and realised he was crying.

viii. give me a chance

Jeonghan woke up with the worst headache he had endured in years. The blinding light from the window had directed itself into his eyes and no matter how exhausted he was, he was forced to wake up. He found himself still in last night's clothes, sans his shoes, but the fan was on and the glass was only half full.

Jeonghan looked to the other side of the bed. Empty, as always. Jeonghan quickly swallowed the tablet he had laid out for his hangover and downed the water, before groaning loudly at his antics. He could not believe how much he cried. Seungcheol had picked him up, right? God, he said so many embarrassing things, but they were all fuzzy in his mind.

"Jeonghan? Are you okay? I heard noises," Seungcheol burst into the room, causing Jeonghan to yell in surprise.

"Oh my God! What are you doing here?" Jeonghan screeched, covering himself with his duvet even though he was fully clothed.

"You asked me to stay!" Seungcheol defended, "I slept on the couch though!"

"Oh," was all Jeonghan could muster. Seungcheol had always been considerate of him in his drunk state.

"Anyway, I made breakfast," Seungcheol said sheepishly, "Sorry if you mind me going through your fridge."

"It's okay. Thank you," Jeonghan sighed, standing up and putting his slippers on, "Can I just change and wash up?"

Seungcheol nodded innocently before leaving the room and returning to the kitchen to attend to the eggs that were now a little over well done. Eventually, Jeonghan returned in pyjamas and dripping hair. He was always fast at showering and changing.

"How are you feeling?" Seungcheol placed a bowl of steaming rice in front of him as he sat down.

"Worst hangover of the century. I can't believe everyone let me get that drunk," Jeonghan scolded himself internally, "But thank you for getting me and taking care of me."

"No problem, Han. Anything for you."

Jeonghan tried to hide his blush as he looked at the clock, "Isn't it Monday? Don't you have work?"

"Yeah, but I called in sick," Seungcheol began, "I wanted to wait for you to get up so we can talk."

"Talk," Jeonghan breathed out, "Yeah, I guess we should."

"I just want to apologise," Seungcheol said, "For running out on you on New Year's Eve. I'm just so torn."

"That was a dick move. Again," Jeonghan uttered, "Why did you? Why are you torn?"

"You still love me, Han. You deserve so much better than someone who broke your heart," Seungcheol exclaimed.

"Isn't that for me to decide?" Jeonghan snapped back, shoving a mound of rice and egg into his mouth, "If you don't love me, just tell me. I hate this dancing around that we're doing with each other."

Seungcheol stammered, "I- It's always you Han. It'll only ever be you. I don't want to leave you again, but I want you to be sure of it."

Jeonghan scoffed and rolled his eyes, "Seungcheol, I'm the only one here that's been trying to get us back together. I'm the one that's putting my pain behind me and telling you that I still love you. Which of my actions say that I'm not sure?"

"I don't know," Seungcheol felt small, "I guess I'm being stupid. I just hate myself so much for leaving you that-"

"That you think you don't deserve me anymore?" Jeonghan finished, "Well maybe you don't. But we were together for over 4 years. We weren't fighting at the end because we didn't love each other; life just got hard and we weren't leaning on each other. All these years I've tried to move on, but I just couldn't stop loving you no matter how hard I tried and no matter how much you hurt me. I need you, Seungcheol. Just for once, consider how I feel and give me a chance."

"You're a better person than I'll ever be, Yoon Jeonghan," Seungcheol breathed out, staring at the man in front of him with something akin to adoration. For all the terrible things he had done, he was rewarded with such great things.

"I know I am, so come here and kiss me lifeless."

ix. shotgun

"What?" Seungcheol yelled into his phone, "You're doing what?"

"You hear me, Choi Seungcheol," Soonyoung giggled from the other end of the line, "Now get your ass over to the address in your best suit. You have an hour. And I assume you can tell Yoon Jeonghan too."

And with a click, the line dropped.

"Baby?" Jeonghan's figure entered the bedroom, "What's happening? I heard you scream."

Seungcheol looked up at his 2 month lover in amusement, "It was Soonyoung on the phone. I can't believe what he's doing."

"Is he going on another trip around Asia to see tigers again? Ah, can you even believe he's an adult?"

"No," Seungcheol wheezed out, "He's demanding we get to the courthouse within an hour in our suits."

"What?" Jeonghan's eyes widened, "Why?"

"They're having a shotgut wedding," Seungcheol grinned, "Soonyoung said they just can't wait 8 more months to actually get married so they're signing the papers today. Come on, Han. Let's get ready."

"Those crazy idiots," Jeonghan laughed, "It was Jihoon's idea, wasn't it?"

Seungcheol joined in with his lover's laughter as he wrapped his arm around the other and peppered kissed all over him, "Of course it was. Jihoon is so whipped for Soonie. Hey, maybe we should do something like that too."

Jeonghan rolled his eyes playfully as he untangled himself from Seungcheol's grip, "Slow your roll. We've only been dating 2 months."

Seungcheol's eyes brightened as he took Jeonghan's face into his hands and planted a passionate kiss on his lips, "But I've been in love with you for 9 years. A lot longer than Jihoon and Soonyoung."

It was true. They had met when Seungcheol transferred from Daegu to Jeonghan's school at the start of their junior year. Jeonghan had been tasked to show him around and to this day, Seungcheol claims it was love at first sight on the skinny boy with shoulder length brown hair. They had been inseparable all through high school, and Seungcheol followed Jeonghan into college and confessed on the third night that they moved out.

"Put a ring on my finger and maybe I'll consider it," Jeonghan smirked and pushed him away, "I'm gonna go to my apartment and change into a suit, so I'll meet you there?"

Seungcheol nodded, and Jeonghan connected their lips sweetly, "I'll see you later, Hannie. I love you."

"I love you too! I'm so excited to see you in your suit!"

Jeonghan let the bedroom door click shut behind him, leaving Seungcheol sitting on his bed in some kind of a daze. His best friends were getting married! They were having a shotgun wedding! They were crazy like that, he thought to himself.

Eventually, his mind and eyes wandered to the drawer in front of his bed that held his TV. In the third drawer, underneath his sleep shirts, he had buried a small and square velvet box that he had purchased impulsively at the end of his senior year. The ring that sat inside wasn't so expensive actually, but Jeonghan had pointed it out one day when they were walking hand in hand in the shopping centre. It had been on sale and maybe it was stupid of Seungcheol to dip into his savings and buy a ring, but he did.

Seungcheol knew that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with Jeonghan then, and he shared the sentiment now. He knew that if he got down on one knee, Jeonghan would say yes. He knew that if he seriously suggested following in Jihoon and Soonyoung's footsteps and saying fuck it to everything, Jeonghan would say yes. They were each other's everything- each other's soulmates.

He snapped himself out of imagining what married life would be like with Jeonghan and rushed over to his wardrobe to pick out his best suit.

Soon, Seungcheol thought to himself, soon.

#jeongcheol #seventeen #svt #seventeen au #fic recs #jeongcheol au #exes to lovers #jeonghan #seungcheol #yoon jeonghan #choi seungcheol #jeongcheol fic recs #jeongcheol fluff #jeongcheol angst #jeongcheol fic #fluff #angst #kpop au

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vallkyr · 1 year

Text

Step Out

When the people you trust most leave you to get caught by the task force hunting you, what else is there to do but finding new allies?

Different account now but the gif has still been made by the lovely @agustdawn

Pairings: Chan x Kwangsun (OC), Chan x Felix, Minho x Jisung, Changbin x Hyunjin, Younghyun x Liam (OC), Siyeon x Jonghyeon, Aaron x Minhyun and other minor pairings

Genres: Angst, Emotional Hurt, Hurt/Comfort, some Romance and bits of Fluff in between

Tags: Dystopia AU, Rebels AU

Chapter Tags: -

Rating: Mature

General Warnings: Violence, Injury, Panic Attacks, Minor Character Death

Chapter Warnings: mention of injury, scars

Word Count: 12,904

Masterpost

< Previous Chapter |

Hey everyone! Step Out is back after two years! To be honest, I had a hard time writing Step Out since the allegations against Woojin started coming up and it didn’t change after the allegations turned out to be fake. I just couldn’t keep the story the way it was so I decided to replace Woojin by an OC. And since I was already changing things I went ahead and made some more changes (like also replacing Jae by an OC), edited everything I had uploaded and so on. I feel way more comfortable writing Step Out now so I hope that the next update won’t take quite as long. Until then, please enjoy the 9th chapter 💕

Chapter 9 - The burden of secrets

Numbers. So many goddamn numbers. A whole damn block of them. As though the mission wasn’t enough already. It’s all so damn overwhelming. Missions require all the concentration and energy Minho can muster and they always leave his brain exhausted, drained and lazy. And now he has to decipher the fucking message in this condition. He’s been fiddling around on his phone and sharpening pencils for ages now. Minho sighs as he peeks over to the sheet of paper on his desk, trying to get himself to get to work.

11111 111111

101 10 010 1110 110 000000 0011 1110 000000 0100 0 000000 0100 0010 00 000000 1110 0011 100 1000 111111

1 0100 0 0 1000 1 101 0011 0100 0 000000 101 0100 000000 101 1101 1000 000000 101 1000 010 001 111111

01 1000 000000 01 0011 0101 0101 000000 1001 1000 101 000000 101 00 010 0011 0 0011 0 1001 000000 101 0100 000000 1001 0100 000000 0100 0 000000 001 0011 1110 1110 0011 0100 0 1110 000000 1110 0100 0100 0 111111

011 1000 0100 011 0101 1000 000000 1110 101 0011 0101 0101 000000 100 0011 1110 0101 0011 0001 1000 000000 0010 1110 111111

1101 0010 1001 000000 0101 0010 111 000000 110 00 0100 001 000000 001 1000 111111

His head hurts just thinking about deciphering all of that. The first message was already a pain in the ass and the prospect of more and more and more messages like this is daunting. Why did he agree to that anyways? Talking is so much easier. Why does this shit have to be so complicated? Minho should probably make a table. So far, he hasn’t had the time for that, and he had hoped to avoid it for safety reasons. But the more he thinks about it, the more he feels like it can’t be avoided. He really underestimated how much work these messages would be. Minho sighs once again while he gets the writing pad from the drawer and places it on the table next to the message. He takes a pencil and a ruler and starts drawing his grid before gradually filling it. Letter by letter, code by code.

After an hour or so the whole thing is finally complete – at least Minho guesses it was an hour. Time runs as fast as a snail when you try to figure out what the letter Q looks like in your secret code. Minho hates that the code has to be this complicated, but it’s safety first and convenience second in this situation. They mustn’t risk the DIT spying into their communication. If anyone was to find the messages, they would surely give them over to that hell hole of an organisation. Just like the government expects of a ‘good citizen’.

Needing a bit of a change for his tortured brain, Minho decides to put everything aside for now and go downstairs into the kitchen. As expected, Spear B, Felix and Jisung have already started preparing dinner. The sweetest smile spreads over Jisung’s face when he spots Minho in the doorway and gestures for him to come over.

“How is it going?” How is it possible for someone to be this beautiful while peeling a carrot? If B and Lux weren’t here, Minho would love to hug Jisung right now. It would be so lovely to be in Jisung’s embrace, feel his warmth and just forget about his code-wrecked brain. But they aren’t alone. The others’ presence feels like a dark shadow looming over Minho.

“It’s exhausting,” Minho admits. “I wish there was an easier way, but meeting Virus regularly would be too dangerous even if he takes turns with Mercury.”

Jisung hums in understanding. “Then you’re here to take a break? I’m sure we’ll find something for you.”

“Yes please. I really need to get my mind off things a little.”

Without hesitation, Felix grabs his cutting board and sets it down in front of Minho. “Have fun.” His voice sounds overly sweet and the wateriness of Felix’s eyes gives Minho a pretty solid idea of what his task is going to be. Minho’s fear is confirmed when he looks down and is met with stinging in his own eyes. Onions. That explains why Felix was so quick to leave and find himself something else to do. Cutting onions definitely isn’t Minho’s favourite task, but at this point every distraction from that damn code is welcome. Even onions.

“Should have known I’d end up with that.” Despite the tears already forming in his eyes, Minho picks up the knife and gets to work. With the four of them all going about their tasks, they’re soon done preparing everything and can get to cooking, which Felix takes upon himself despite Minho’s protests. From then on Minho, Jisung and B are basically… useless. Everything they can do is keep Felix company and occasionally hand him ingredients. Jisung and Spear B soon start chatting with Felix occasionally chipping in when he isn’t too busy. Minho doesn’t have much to contribute except for a few sentences here and there. His mind is running a mile a minute and is completely empty at the same time. There’s so much to do, so much to think about, but Minho can’t seem to focus on anything. So many 0s and 1s are still circling through his brain.

“Dinner should be done soon,” Felix says before turning towards them. “Can one of you set the table?”

“On my way,” Minho says without hesitation. He is already getting plates from the cupboard when Jisung, who has been sitting on the kitchen counter since he finished peeling carrots, scoots over to him.

“Can I give you a hand?” When he sees Jisung like this, Minho almost forgets they had a mission today. Jisung looks calm and cosy in his oversized sweater that Minho is pretty sure is actually his own. He has been stealing more and more clothes from Minho lately, which should be annoying. But Minho finds it weirdly endearing. He could probably get his clothes back if he really wanted to, though he really prefers seeing them on Jisung over having them wait for him in the closet.

“Sure.”

Jisung slides down from the counter, helps Minho gather everything they need and carry it over to the dining room. Minho is about to go back to the kitchen and get glasses for them when Jisung stops him with a hand on his wrist. The little touch has Minho’s body shift down from forcing himself to function into just existing. He can finally let himself feel his tiredness and exhaustion without pushing it away. When Jisung tugs at his arm, Minho lets his heavy body be pulled away from the archway leading to the kitchen, into the privacy of the little dining room. “Are you okay?” Jisung’s pretty eyes are full of worry as he takes a closer look at Minho. “You seem so quiet.”

“Yeah it’s okay. I’m just exhausted and that message is eating my last brain cells.”

Jisung hums like he’s trying to come up with a way to make it better. Minho simply steps closer and lets his head drop onto Jisung’s shoulder. After a moment Jisung slings his arms around Minho and holds him close. Having Jisung hug him lets Minho forget about the code, about the table, about Felix and B in the kitchen, about everything. It feels like Jisung knocked over the glass of his mind and let all the stuff keeping him busy pour out before setting it down again. After a while Jisung starts humming a low tune and lightly swaying them back and forth. Minho can’t help but giggle as he closes his eyes and allows himself to sink deeper into Jisung’s embrace.

“You guys are taking ages. Do you need help with setting the table?” Hearing Spear B’s voice makes Minho tense up. He gives Jisung a quick slap on the butt that has Jisung smile to himself before stepping away from him. When Minho heads back into the kitchen, Jisung follows close behind him and helps him finish setting the table just in time for lunch to be ready.

Minho feels a lot more at ease when they’re eating. The weight of the day feels a little lighter now that he gets to have a break for once. Since Felix did most of the actual cooking, B and Jisung volunteer to do the dishes after dinner. Though hesitant, Minho goes back to decoding after clearing the table for them. He still isn’t enthusiastic about having to work again, but Minho’s brain definitely feels fresher after a bit of distraction and a tad of Jisung. Hopefully working with the code will be easier now that he has a table. He’ll just have to be a bit more careful now so nobody else gets their hands on it.

[-]

“Don’t stop.” Younghyun cracks an eye open to look up at Liam. Thankfully his request works and makes his boyfriend go right back to patting Younghyun’s hair.

“I should have gotten a dog instead.” Despite his words, Liam doesn’t stop or makes a move to get Younghyun’s head off his lap. “A dog would just fall asleep after five minutes and I could watch TV in peace.”

“A dog can’t cook dinner for you.” Noticing Liam directing a critical look at the empty pizza boxes, Younghyun quickly adds. “Not even on a good day.” As much as he loves cooking with Liam, after hearing that Jungkook is injured and having to deliver the news to Bambam Younghyun had been happy to just drop onto the couch and eat. He still feels exhausted, but it doesn’t matter anymore. Younghyun’s home.

“You underestimate my ability to teach a dog tricks.”

“My bad, I forgot your secret career as a dog trainer.” Younghyun fully opens his eyes and grins up at his boyfriend, who shakes his head and focuses on the TV again. “Speaking of dinner, Chan accepted the invitation. Is tomorrow alright?”

“Sure, I can go grocery shopping after work if we still need anything.” It takes a while before the question Younghyun was already expecting follows. “Any idea what we’ll cook?”

The same old problem. It’s been years and yet the struggle of ‘What can we cook?’ never gets any easier. “No, you?”

“Nope.”

“Fuck.” He and Liam start giggling. Younghyun really should have expected this when he invited Chan over. Deciding what they want to have for dinner is already hard enough when it’s just the two of them, but guests always make it even more difficult because they can’t bullshit their way through it and hope the result is edible. “I could ask Chan if he has any preferences.”

Liam gasps in fake surprise. “You’re a genius.”

“Bet a dog wouldn’t have been able to come up with that.” Younghyun chuckles.

“That’s it. Get off my lap.” It’s obvious Liam isn’t serious, but Younghyun sits up nonetheless and shifts to sit next to Liam. As soon as that’s done, he leans closer to kiss Liam’s cheek. Liam seems almost surprised. A little smile fills his face before morphing into a slightly suspicious frown. “What did you do?”

Younghyun rolls his eyes. Obviously, he cannot possible show affection if he didn’t screw up and accidentally wash a red sock with the white laundry. “Nothing. Just trying to thank you for your helping with delivering the news to my unit. I couldn’t have done it without you.”

Liam’s gaze softens. “It was still you doing all the work,” he insists. “I just did my part to calm you down for that.”

Younghyun only hums in agreement. They don’t need any more words. Just locking eyes is enough for Younghyun to know Liam understands how important his support was even if he’s playing it down.

It’s Liam who eventually breaks the warm silence between them. “We should go to sleep. If we can’t manage to have a healthy sleeping schedule, you should at least get some rest after missions.”

Sadly he does have a point with that. Younghyun feels utterly exhausted after the mission and the situation surrounding Jungkook. It takes a bit of effort to get up from the couch, but they eventually make their way to the bathroom to get ready for bed. While they brush their teeth Younghyun watches Liam, who is already stripped down to his briefs and one of Younghyun’s shirts, run his hand through his hair, probably deciding that the dye needs to be freshened up in the near future. To anyone else the situation would look so mundane. But seeing Liam in all his half-dressed glory with toothpaste on his lips has Younghyun feel warm and fuzzy inside. The earlier ‘I’ll see you at home.’ is still present in his mind, because nothing describes what Liam is to him like the word home. Being with Liam makes Younghyun feel safe and at peace. No matter what happens, what might shake up their lives, they handle it side by side. Just like they have been doing for the past seven years already.

Younghyun is snapped out of his thoughts when Liam slaps him on the ass. “Did you fall asleep with your eyes wide open? You know you’re supposed to lie down and close your eyes first, right?”

“So that’s what I’ve been doing wrong,” Younghyun mutters while following Liam into their bed. He straddles Liam’s waist and bends down to kiss him while carding his hand through Liam’s chestnut coloured hair. When he pulls back, Liam has the softest smile on his face. They stay like this for a while, looking at each other, Younghyun twirling a strand of Liam’s hair around his finger. If it was an option for them, Younghyun would have asked Liam to marry him then and there. It’s not like either of them needs a ring or certificate whatever – the thought is kind of ridiculous to be honest – but the thought of making it official that they want to spend the rest of their lives together is kind of nice regardless. Though as things stand, they wouldn’t be able to get married no matter if they wanted to or not. At least not here.

“You know that I love you, right?”

“I do.” Liam chuckles. “Love you too, you sap.” Younghyun kisses Liam again and wishes him a good night before sliding out of Liam’s lap and into bed next to him. He falls asleep as soon as his head hits the pillow knowing that he’s home.

[-]

Jisung stops in the door frame to their room when he sees Minho still bent over the desk. Minho looks fully concentrated and totally exhausted at the same time, which is a shame considering how relaxed he had seemed after dinner. Did the little break change anything at all? How Jisung wishes he could do more for Minho. He already puts his all into supporting Minho, cheering him up and making sure he relaxes after a hard day. But it never feels like enough, especially not when Minho looks this worn out. “What are you up to?”

Minho jumps up like a scared deer and immediately scrambles to cover his notes with his arms and upper body. It’s a strange sight, like he’d defend those notes with his life. “Sungie. I thought you and Spear B were doing the dishes.”

Jisung carefully steps into the room and closes the door after himself. “We’re done?” This is odd. Jisung understands if he scared Minho because Minho was focused and didn’t hear him come in. But this? It’s almost as if he’s trying to hide something from Jisung. What can be so drastic about those papers that Jisung isn’t allowed to catch as much as a glimpse of them? “Is something the matter? You seem weird…”

“No, it’s nothing. It’s just that I made myself a table for deciphering the code.” Minho leans back in his chair, giving up his defence over the stack of paper. Though he turns them around nonetheless. He still refuses to let Jisung see a thing of what he’s written down. “I mean you know the drill. If you end up getting questioned about this-”

“The less I know the better.” Jisung scoffs as he walks over to the bed and lets himself fall down onto it. This is so frustrating. Even though he’s kind of relieved Minho isn’t keeping any actual secrets from him, it sucks that Jisung isn’t allowed to learn the code. He wishes he could help Minho with deciphering or writing messages or do anything else useful aside from assisting Minho in planning.

“Jisung…” Worry sounds through Minho’s voice as he gets up, follows Jisung to the bed and crouches down on the floor in front of him. Just hearing Minho say his name pushes the negative feelings back a bit. No matter how chaotic and awful things around them might get, at the very least they’ll always have each other. Things between them have been going so well. They used to spend basically every free minute together anyways, but they’ve become even closer since they’ve been living here together.

“Don’t worry about it. I’ll just read a bit while you work on the messages.”

“You sure?” Minho’s gaze is so gentle that just looking into his eyes releases a swarm of butterflies in Jisung’s stomach. Jisung wonders if he’ll ever fully get used to the way he melts into a puddle around Minho.

“Yeah. Now hurry up and get everything done. The sooner you’re back the sooner can I start cuddling you.”

“True.” Minho is smiling when he rises from the floor again. He stops midway to place a little kiss on Jisung’s lips. “Can’t wait.” Jisung can’t wait either. The thought of burying his face in Minho��s chest and breathing in Minho’s scent while they snuggle as close as they can already feels so wonderful. It will be like heaven to fall asleep in Minho’s arms after the mission. Damnit, Minho really needs to hurry and finish those messages.

“I’m rooting for you!” Jisung calls. The chuckle sends a little tremble through Minho’s shoulders, which is the most endearing thing ever. Jisung takes a moment to look at Minho’s back, basks in the warm feeling that spreads through his chest from being around his boyfriend. It never ceases to amaze Jisung how strong Minho is. Everyone feels exhausted after their missions yet here Minho is, still fulfilling his duties even though he probably wants to just fall into bed and sleep more than anyone. It’s so much work to plan their missions and it must be even more tiring to keep track of everyone and everything during the mission itself. How Minho can stay on top of it all is beyond Jisung’s comprehension.

Deciding to stay true to his words, Jisung gets up from the bed, walks over to the book shelve by the windows and starts looking through everything. Since this is – or rather used to be – the bedroom of Changbin’s parents, most of the books are… not really to Jisung’s liking. There’s stuff about business tactics, handling human resources, and ways to relax at work as well as literary classics that bore Jisung just from looking at them. The depressing choice of books makes Jisung glad he decided keep some books he stole from Changbin’s sister on the nearby side board. Jisung picks one that looks interesting, lies down on the bed again and starts reading.

The book isn’t quite as good as Jisung had hoped –well, it’s only the beginning anyways – but it keeps him busy. After a while, there’s shuffling at the desk, which immediately makes Jisung peeks over the pages of his books. Minho rips a piece from a blank sheet of paper and starts noting down his reply. Even from across the room, Jisung can tell Minho is hurrying. As soon as it’s done, he jumps up, turns around and proudly presents the note to Jisung.

00011 111111

0100 1011 1110 0101 111111

0100 1011 0000 000000 0100 1001 001 100 11 000000 1011 01 000000 0101 1011 010 110 1 000000 0101 1011 1110 0101 111111

1 010 0001 0001 01 0001 000000 111 10 1001 1000 000000 100 001 011 111111

Jisung doesn’t know what it says, the only meaning that matters to him is that Minho comes towards him with big steps. Jisung barely has time to put the book in his hands aside before Minho is already tackling him in a hug. They nestle together, Minho lying on top of Jisung like a blanket. Jisung wraps his arms around Minho and starts rubbing his back in slow, soothing motions. “Are you going to bring that note to your mailbox today?”

“No, it can wait until tomorrow morning. I just have to make it before Virus’ shift,” Minho mumbles into the crook of Jisung’s neck. “I just want to sleep now.”

“You can’t sleep fully clothed though.” Jisung emphasises his point by pulling at the elastic of Minho’s sweatpants before letting it snap against his skin.

“Sure I can.” Minho already sounds half asleep. “Just watch me.”

Seeing no other way to motivate his boyfriend, Jisung pushes Minho off of him, earning himself a frustrated whine. Giggling, Jisung rolls Minho onto his back, gets onto his knees and pulls Minho up by the arms. “Come on.” Minho still pretends to be annoyed by Jisung’s attempts to get him out of bed, making himself deadweight in Jisung’s arms. But the smile on his lips says otherwise.

“You could just undress me here.”

“Tempting,” Jisung admits. “But I can’t brush your teeth here.” Minho groans in annoyance when Jisung finally succeeds in hoisting Minho off the bed and into a standing position. Thinking that this will be enough, Jisung turns to walk away, but is stopped by arms circling his waist. With Minho basically glued to his back, Jisung drags both of them to the bathroom.

[-]

Jungkook’s mind feels fuzzy when he wakes up to a dark room. He can’t even remember going to bed last night. Except this isn’t his bed. Or his bedroom. Where is he? Where else would he be? Is he staying over at someone else’s place? Once Jungkook’s eyes are used to the darkness he takes a look around himself. This is a hospital room. And he’s the patient. He vaguely remembers waking up in the recovery room and that he was transferred, but he must have passed out again right after. What happened?

And what’s that sound? Water? Why would water be running in the middle of the night? Jungkook tries to sit up, but the pain in his leg stops him. He remains propped up on his elbows to take another look around the room. He got a single bed room, so there’s no roommate who could be showering at absurd hours. It could be from next door though? That’s probably it, right? What else would it be? Jungkook lets himself fall back onto the bed and closes his eyes. He’s so damn tired. No matter he much he must have slept already if it became night in the meantime, he doesn’t feel the least bit refreshed.

Suddenly the water stops followed by the sound of the shower door opening and the rustling of a towel. It’s too loud to be from a different room. But who would be here? The walls are probably just thinner than Jungkook would have thought. He should be sleeping instead of worrying his head over weird noises. Jungkook is about to doze off when the bathroom door creaks, making Jungkook snap his eyes open and – for lack of a better memory – try to sit up again. Fucking shit.

“Hey, careful.” Jimin rushes closer to his bed. “Is everything okay?”

“Yes…” Jimin? Why is Jimin here? He was on the ambulance with Jungkook, right? Yes, if nothing else Jungkook definitely remembers Jimin holding his hand in the ambulance. But what is he doing in Jungkook’s room? Jungkook looks up at Jimin, only now noticing the towel hanging over Jimin’s shoulders. His gaze wanders farther up to Jimin’s hair that is dripping water onto his shirt. Jimin showered in his hospital room? “What are you doing here?”

“You don’t remember?” Jimin chuckles while pulling a chair over to the bed and sitting down beside Jungkook. “We talked after you woke up. I asked you if I could shower here and you said it was fine.”

“Uhm.” Jungkook’s mind is completely blank. He can’t remember waking up before or talking to Jimin, but he can’t imagine that Jimin would lie about something like that. Why would he, anyways? “I don’t know. I guess I fell asleep right after.”

“Looks like it. Sorry if I startled you.” A warm smile takes over Jimin’s face. How come he looks so gorgeous without even doing anything? There’s something so gentle and cosy about seeing Jimin freshly out of the shower wearing a plain, white shirt. Immediately, Jungkook’s thoughts start wandering again. He remembers the way Jimin held his hand in the ambulance, how much strength Jimin’s presence was giving him. If he focuses, he can still feel Jimin’s warmth. As much as Jungkook would love to stay right here, look at Jimin and wallow in memories, he really needs to get to the bathroom. Now. But he doesn’t even manage to get out of bed before pain jolts through his leg once again.

“Wait.” Jimin jumps up, fetches a pair of crutches from the end of the bed and hands them to Jungkook. “Do you need any help?” Even now that Jungkook’s injury has been taken care of, Jimin is still worrying about Jungkook. Jungkook would find it sweet if he wasn’t so busy feeling guilty about it.

“I don’t know.” Jungkook is still wobbly when he gets up, but he somehow manages to get himself standing on his intact leg. Despite this, Jimin doesn’t seem totally convinced that he’s fine. He follows every single one of Jungkook’s slow steps as though he fears Jungkook might collapse any second. Jimin even pushes the bathroom door open for Jungkook, which is when Jungkook stops for a moment. “I think I can do the rest by myself.”

“You sure?” Jimin’s voice is smug as he tilts his head to the side and looks at Jungkook in a way that has Jungkook weak in his knees. And that’s even though he can barely see Jimin in the darkness of the hospital room. This is really the wrong moment to be whipped, Jungkook needs every bit of his strength his legs have in stock.

“Yes.” Jungkook definitely is sure. He’s never been surer in his life. A mere second later, Jimin breaks into giggles and goes to sit down in his chair again. Jungkook almost sighs in relief. He doubts his pride would survive Jimin helping him on the toilet. When Jungkook returns Jimin is still sitting in the chair, which almost surprises Jungkook. Part of him thought he might be having hallucinations from the anaesthesia. It’s only now that Jungkook realises Jimin is still in his uniform pants. The jacket that goes with it hangs from the back of the chair Jimin is sitting on.

“Is something wrong?” Jimin asks after Jungkook has apparently looked at him for a bit too long. His voice goes back to sounding worried so quickly it really bothers Jungkook. He doesn’t want to worry Jimin, especially not with something as simple as spacing out for a moment.

“You’ve been here the entire time?”

Jimin briefly looks down on himself before nodding. “Yeah. I didn’t want you to be alone.” He runs his hand through his still damp hair. “Besides I still need to interrogate you and report to the Corporal. That can wait until tomorrow though. You need to rest now.”

“So do you.” Jungkook finally makes his way back to the bed. In an instant, Jimin is back by his side, helps him lift his injured leg onto the mattress and get comfortable again. Jimin pulls his chair even closer, right next to the bed, and takes Jungkook’s hand into his just like he had done in the ambulance. Immediately, Jungkook’s cheeks starts heating up. Hopefully Jimin can’t see him blush in the dark. Gosh, why does Jungkook have to be so nervous because of something so simple? Jimin always makes him feel like some stupid teenager having his very first crush.

“I’m really glad you’re fine, Jungkook-ah.”

“Thank you.” What else could he say to that? Jungkook has no idea how he even manages to keep his voice in check, but he’s grateful for himself. At least that part of talking still works. Jimin holding his hand is still so foreign and it makes Jungkook’s heart race like crazy. How come this is actually happening for the second time in one day? “What did the doctors tell you?” Great. Change the topic when he’s getting emotional. Perfect. Exactly what Jungkook really wants.

“Not much,” Jimin admits. “Just that surgery went well and that you should be back on track in a few weeks. I’m sure they’ll tell you everything in more detail tomorrow.”

“Yeah.” Jungkook still has no idea what to say. Usually conversations with Jimin are so easy, but now there’s this strange tension. It’s not a bad one per se, but one that’s way more emotional than anything they’ve shared before. This is probably just because of the shock, Jungkook tells himself, Jimin must have been worried about losing a member of his unit. Jungkook tries his best to ignore the part of him that just wants to pull Jimin close and kiss him when Jimin absentmindedly rubs his thumb over the back of Jungkook’s hand. The little, maybe meaningless, gesture feels so damn intimate. Jungkook really needs to get a hold of himself, just because Jimin is holding his hand doesn’t mean he wants anything beyond that. But obviously, Jimin isn’t going to let getting a grip be easy.

“We should go to sleep now.” Seeing Jimin’s gentle smile in the dark, alongside his low voice and the words he’s saying make Jungkook’s mind run crazy. Even though he highly doubts Jimin is going to lie down next to him, Jungkook immediately wonders what it would be like. He’d give everything to experience going to bed with Jimin, seeing him in one of Jungkook’s shirts, hugging him from behind and making him smile by whispering ‘Good night.’ into his ear. Fuck, Jungkook should not be having these kinds of thoughts about his Lance Corporal.

“You’re right. Good night, Jimin-ah.” Jungkook kind of expected Jimin to complain about the lack of honorifics the way he usually does. But today he just shakes his head and smiles. What’s with him today? Jungkook isn’t sure whether he should be relieved or sad when Jimin eventually lets go of his hand. Though Jungkook is sure he doesn’t like it when Jimin retreats to his chair, despite expecting it. Even with the way Jimin leans back, it doesn’t seem comfortable in the least. He can’t really lie down, he doesn’t have any kind of blanket and without any kind of armrests, chances are Jimin might just tip over to the side. Jungkook feels kind of bad for making Jimin sleep like that. It doesn’t matter that none of this was Jungkook’s idea, Jimin decided it all on his own. “The bed is big enough, you know? You could lie down with me.” Oh dear lord, did Jungkook really just suggest they share a hospital bed?

The beat of silence that passes afterwards makes Jungkook’s nervousness so much worse. Was that offer too much? Did he make things weird? He went too far, didn’t it? Maybe Jungkook should have just kept quiet. But then again, there’s no harm asking right? It’s the least he can do when Jimin takes care of him like that. “That’s nice,” Jimin eventually replies. “But I think it would be safer if I stayed in the chair. I don’t want to hurt you while we sleep.”

“Ah right…” The answer makes Jungkook feel a little stupid. Of course Jimin wouldn’t lie down in bed with him. He shouldn’t have suggested that.

“It still hasn’t set in that you’re injured, huh?” When Jimin smiles all the negative thoughts come to a halt. Jungkook just really likes Jimin’s eye smile, when his eyes nearly disappear and his full lips curl up.

“Not really,” Jungkook admits. “Everything happened so fast.” One moment Jungkook was still going after I.N, the next Bora is dragging him out of the building. Something that happened in a matter of second will take him weeks to recover. It seems so ridiculous.

“I’m sure you’ll come to terms with everything once you have a bit of time to yourself.”

“Yeah maybe.” Even when Jimin wishes him a good night once again, leans back in his chair and closes his eyes, Jungkook has trouble looking away from him. Despite all the complicated feelings that come with it, Jungkook is really glad Jimin is here. He wouldn’t have wanted to be alone after this mess. Wasn’t that exactly want Jimin was going for? That Jungkook wouldn’t feel like he’s all by himself after everything that has happened? “Thank you for being here, it means a lot,” Jungkook mutters, a smile tugs at Jimin’s lips but he doesn’t say anything. Jungkook doesn’t know for how long he continues looking at Jimin until he finally falls asleep.

[-]

“Good morning you two. I’m Lance Corporal Kang Dongho of battle team unit C.” Despite the cheerful smile and friendly tone, Chan feels kind of intimidated by the man standing in front of them. Lance Corporal Kang is only a little taller than Chan, but with a noticeably broader built. And he’s definitely way more muscular than both Chan and Kwangsun. Aside from his physical appearances, just the words “battle team” leave an uneasy feeling in Chan’s gut. He still hasn’t forgotten the looks they got on their first day. Though at the very least, he can’t remember Lance Corporal Kang being among the people who death glared at them. So Chan has hope that the Lance Corporal wasn’t completely forced to work with them and may have even volunteered to work with them. One is allowed to dream after all. “The Corporals and Sergeant Park decided that it would be good for you to come along when our division marches out. It’s my task to make sure you are prepared for that.”

“We will go on missions with you guys?” Sitting in the office and being asked questions is one thing, but going out and actively fighting Stray Kids is different. Would they have to carry guns like the real DIT members? Would they have to shoot if they came across one of the members? The thought makes Chan’s blood freeze. He can’t do that. He can’t point a gun at them. He can’t go that far.

But he has to. Chan was resolved to do everything it takes, he mustn’t back down now.

“Exactly. Sergeant Park thinks it will be good to have you there since you know the way Stray Kids operate better than anyone else.”

“Okay…”

Kwangsun seems to notice his discomfort if the way he steps closer is anything to go by. Chan turns around to look at him, feeling a bit reassured by the hint of a smile on Kwangsun’s face. No matter what happens, he’s not alone. They’re going to do all of this together.

“What exactly is the plan?” Kwangsun asks after turning back to Lance Corporal Kang. Chan is pretty glad he’s taking over talking; he really doesn’t feel like doing it right now.

“Well first of all we’ll have to figure out your current skill level and which areas still need work in. Then we’ll have to make sure you meet the requirements of the DIT. After all we don’t want to put you at risk when marching out with us.”

“When are we going to start?”

“Right now.” Lance Corporal Kang beams at them. “There are some workout clothes for you on the table over there. We’ll practice every day after lunch break until 4pm. The people of my unit will be in the common room or with unit A so we have this room to ourselves for practice.”

Oh. Chan had hoped for a little more time to stomach the news. The thought of going after the rest of Stay Kids is still so foreign he doesn’t feel ready to start training for it. Contrary to him, Kwangsun doesn’t seem to have much of a problem with the situation. Without any bit of hesitation, he walks over to the table and grabs himself a set from one pile of the aforementioned clothes. They’re supposed to change here? In the practice room? In front of Lance Corporal Kang?

Chan takes a deep breath to steady himself. He may be a bit out of practice by now, but it can’t be that hard. Nobody is paying attention to him anyways, right? Then why is there still this fear bubbling up inside of him? He glances over at Kwangsun and the Lance Corporal, finding them still chatting. Good. At least there’s that. If he hurries they won’t see. Chan grabs the shirt from his pile of clothes, backs himself against the wall, quickly slips out of the shirt and into the new one. As soon as the fabric slides over his skin he starts to feel more at ease again. When he looks up, Kwangsun and Lance Corporal Kang are still talking about some workout. Neither of them seems to have noticed anything. Feeling a bit more relaxed now that the worst part is done, Chan takes the pair of grey sweatpants from the table and changes the rest of the way. He’ll really have to find a different way to do this if they’re going to continue training with Lance Corporal Kang.

[-]

“Good morning!” Jungkook frowns when a cheerful voice rips him out of his sleep. Why is hospital staff at war with sleep? Wouldn’t sleeping in be beneficial for his recovery or something? When Jungkook tries to sit up a bit, his gaze immediately lands on Jimin who’s still sleeping slumped on the chair. He actually stayed here all night? The nurse currently chattering about the beautiful weather today doesn’t seem to have noticed Jimin’s presence yet. Jungkook waits for her to look at him before lifting his finger to his lips and nodding over to the chair. The nurse freezes in her movements and breathes a silent “Oh.” as soon as she spots Jimin. Luckily, Jimin seems to still be sound asleep despite her loud voice. He must be a heavy sleeper. “Should I come back later?” the nurse mouths.

Jungkook nods, smiling when she gives him a thumbs up and leaves his room again. Still feeling incredibly tired, Jungkook lies down and tries to get comfortable again. But of course, he can’t seem to close his eyes when Jimin is right next to him. In his sleep, Jimin slid down on the chair a bit. His legs are spread far apart, his arms are crossed in front of his chest and his head is hanging low. The sunlight streaming in through the stark white curtains is playing with Jimin’s jet black hair. Jungkook is glad Jimin didn’t wake up when the nurse came in, not just because it gives him the opportunity to stare a little bit. (Yes, Jungkook is aware that’s kind of creepy.) Mainly, Jungkook is glad Jimin gets to sleep a bit more. Jimin really stayed here over night just so Jungkook wouldn’t be alone. He must have been so exhausted after the mission. Despite all the difficulties, Jimin chose being there for Jungkook over his well-deserved rest. Knowing that Jimin would do anything for their unit is one thing, experiencing it a totally different one. And having Jimin do it for him specifically has Jungkook’s heart race a little.

No matter how nice it may be to have Jimin care for him like that, Jungkook is worried about him. It’s probably ridiculous. Jimin knows his limits; he doesn’t need anyone to fuss over him. Even before Jimin became their Lance Corporal, Jungkook has always been impressed by his strength, both physical and mental. Jimin may have a handsome face and a rather slim build, especially compared to a lot of guys on the battle team, but that doesn’t mean he can’t kick ass. On top of that, Jimin knows how to lead a team. He has no trouble joking around with everyone but is well aware of when enough is enough and how to keep them on track when needed. It’s not surprising he was picked to become Lance Corporal after Jongdae left. Jimin is amazing as a person and as a leader. He gives so much when he doesn’t have to. And here Jungkook goes again, getting carried away when he allows his thoughts about Jimin to flow.

It’s crazy how tired operations – and thinking about your crush - can make you. Before Jungkook knows it, he’s dozing off again. Whether it’s for ten minutes or two hours, Jungkook doesn’t know, only that he wakes up when Jimin stirs awake on his chair. “Good morning,” Jungkook mumbles while pushing himself up into a sitting position.

Jimin rubs the sleep out of his eyes while sitting up. “Mornin’.” He rolls his shoulders before pushing his arms up to stretch, whining softly while he does so. Oh dear lord, Jimin looks so soft. So huggable. And just like that Jungkook is back to the fantasy of last night: sharing a bed with Jimin, seeing him in one of Jungkook’s shirts with dishevelled hair and a slow tired smile on his face. For fuck’s sake Jungkook has been having these kind of thoughts under control while they’re at work, why are his feelings acting up now? Is it because of everything that happened yesterday? Or is it just because they’re alone? When they do meet outside of work it’s usually with the other members of the unit. Jungkook is totally not used to getting to put his full attention on Jimin without worrying about anyone else getting suspicious.

“How are you feeling today?” Jimin mumbles. His voice is still a little rough, but Jimin seems to slowly be coming alive.

“Alright, I guess. But I haven’t tried to move yet so who knows?”

“Good, keep it up.” Jimin wags his finger at Jungkook and chuckles before getting up from his spot and starting to stretch his limbs. It takes all of Jungkook’s self-restraint, but Jungkook manages not to stare at the stretch of skin that is exposed when Jimin’s shirt rides up from the little exercises. “I still have to interview you on the whole incident.” Jimin doesn’t sound happy about having to conduct this interview in the least, but Jungkook guesses there’s no way around it. Since Jimin can’t seem to find anything to write on, he starts a recording on his phone and begins with the interview.

Even after having had more time to process everything, there isn’t much Jungkook can tell Jimin about yesterday’s events. The incident with I.N just happened too fast. Jimin asks him question after question, coaxing more details out of Jungkook than he thought would be possible. But in the end, it still doesn’t feel like much. After they reach the limits of Jungkook’s memory, Jimin thanks him and starts packing up his stuff. “I should probably get going. What time is it?” Truth be told, Jungkook is feeling a little disappointed that their time is over already. Well, it’s probably obvious that he doesn’t want Jimin to leave. It would be too good to be true if Jimin was able to stay with him.

“I have no idea,” Jungkook admits. He hasn’t even considered checking the clock until now. As he found out today, when he’s alone with Jimin time doesn’t matter. But sadly, it matters to Jimin. He checks his phone, groaning as soon as the screen lights up.

“Fuck, I should be at work already.” Jimin quickly puts on his jacket. “Sorry, I wish I could stay longer. Are you going to be okay?” No. Definitely not. Jimin needs to stay here and personally nurse Jungkook back to health.

“Yeah, don’t worry about me.”

Jimin smiles. He finally smiles again. Words can’t express how much Jungkook loves Jimin’s smile. “Great. I’ll make sure to drop by again after work. Behave until then.” Already about to leave, Jimin stops in the doorframe and turns around again. “Oh and Jungkook-ah?”

“Yes?”

“The way I know you you’re going to try and hurry to get back with us. Please don’t do that. I know it’s hard to sit around and wait, but you need time to recover. Promise me you’ll take things slow for now.”

Jungkook swallows around the lump in his throat. There it is again, Jimin’s worry. But combined with the little smile on his face, it doesn’t feel quite as heavy, makes Jungkook’s heart flutter rather than weighing him down. “I promise.”

[-]

“Happy Birthday!!!”

The cheers are followed by the sound of a party horn right before Yeji is yanked forward. Hyunjin laughs as Yeji stumbles over the threshold and right into Yuna’s hug. “Thank you,” Yeji says in between giggles. “I’m glad you’re here.”

“Sorry we’re late.” As soon as she’s inside the apartment, Yuna rushes to the couch to hug Jisu and Chaeryoung too.

“Yeah, someone took ages in the bathroom,” Ryujin explains with a pointed look at her sister while closing the door behind herself and Yeji. Ooh, there’s definitely some tension there.

“You’re one to talk. Your hair is easy to fix, Unnie!”

It obviously takes Ryujin a lot of self-control to limit her reaction to an eyeroll before finally hugging Yeji. “Happy Birthday, Jiji-ah. Be grateful you have a brother.”

Yeji just barely stops herself from bursting out laughing. “Brothers aren’t any better, trust me.”

“At least I don’t lose half a rabbit in hair every day,” Hyunjin eventually joins into the conversation. He had planned to go unnoticed for a bit longer, as he usually does. Since the couch is facing away from the kitchen his chances would have been pretty good if he had stayed quiet. But one has to defend themselves against defamation like that. Yeji scoffs at him, but Hyunjin ignores it in favour of bringing two more glasses to the couch table for Ryujin and Yuna before taking a seat on the bar stool by their little kitchen island.

“Anyways-” Jisu claps her hands together, effectively ending the almost fight- “now that everyone is here, we can finally get to the gifts!”

“Right!” Chaeryoung hurries to get the large bag she had set down in front of the hall stand and takes out two pastel-coloured boxes with ribbons wrapped around them. She smiles sweetly while coming back to the couch. “This is for you.” She hands one the boxes to Yeji before approaching Hyunjin, her smile turning a little more subtle. “And a little something for you.”

What? “For me?” Hyunjin asks while looking at the little mint green box now in his hands. It feels almost weird to accept the gift from Chaeryoung. He isn’t particular close with any of the girls, even less so after Yeji’s injury. Hyunjin can hardly endure being in a room with them for longer than a few minutes, which is why he’s been avoiding that as much as possible. Why would Yeji’s friends get a gift for him?

“Yeah. It’s your birthday too after all. I mean it’s really nothing big, but we wanted to give you a present too.” The tips of Chaeryoung’s ears turn pink as she talks.

“Thank you…” The last time Hyunjin got a gift from someone other than Yeji was ages ago. Aunt Minyoung had never really bothered with gifts; she had taken Hyunjin and Yeji out to eat on their birthday and that had been it. So getting gifts from Yeji’s friends – people who barely even know him – it feels strange. In a good way but still… weird.

Hyunjin unties the sky blue ribbon, lifts the lid of the box and is met with baby pink fluffiness. He reaches inside and pulls out the soft little thing, examining it from up close. “A hairband?” Hyunjin tries not to sound too confused, he really does, but he has no idea how Yeji’s friends got the idea of giving him a hairband.

“Yeji said your hair is getting way too long and keeps bothering you. She joked that she’d have to either buy you a hairband or cut your hair in your sleep,” Ryujin seems downright proud at having exposed Yeji’s slander of Hyunjin’s hair.

“We thought we should intervene before things get out of hand,” Yuna adds to it. Yeji and Ryujin are both giggling behind their hands. With the bit of context, Hyunjin can’t help but laugh as well. It also makes him want to hide all scissors in their apartment and start locking his door before going to bed, but that will have to wait. For now, he sets the box down on the table and starts putting the hairband on, though judging by the new increase in giggles he’s not doing a very good job. Luckily Chaeryoung is quick to come closer and fix the hairband for him.

“There you go,” she chimes, smiling when she takes a step back to observe her work. Somehow Chaeryoung can’t seem to look away. Hyunjin must be a sight with a pink hairband on his head.

“Looking good.” Thankfully, her words turn the room’s attention back to Yeji. Having everyone’s eyes on him was getting weird. Hyunjin and Chaeryoung eventually go to join the others. They push the coffee table against the wall and take a seat on the floor since it’s already a tight squeeze on the couch with Yeji, Ryujin, and Jisu there. As soon as Yeji opens her present, she starts laughing. “That’s a lot of chocolate.”

“Not just chocolate,” Yuna points out with an amused sparkling in her eyes. “There’s something else, but you need to find it first.” All of the girls look incredibly amused when Yeji laughs and starts unloading various chocolate bars, small boxes of filled chocolates and the like one by one. Basically, all her favourite chocolate snacks are featured in this present. Soon the already cramped couch is overflowing with little boxes and packages and Hyunjin starts to wonder how all of that was ever fit into the box.

“I think I found it!” Proudly, Yeji presents the small box she discovered at the bottom of the box. Her eyes grow wide when she opens it and peeks inside. “Oh my god,” she whispers while lifting a necklace out of the box and taking a closer look at it. The necklace consists of a rather plain, thin, golden chain with a flat heart shaped pendant dangling from it. “You really got that engraved?”

As the only one not involved in the gift, Hyunjin is absolutely clueless. He leans closer to Chaeryoung, whispering loud enough for only her to hear. “What does it say?”

Chaeryoung moves even closer before whispering into Hyunjin’s ear. “I believe in myself.” That’s such a sweet gift, considering the special place those words hold in Yeji’s heart. ‘I believe in myself’ has been her preferred motivational phrase since forever, but even more so after her injury.

“That’s a nice idea,” he replies as quietly as possible. Chaeryoung beams proudly and thanks Hyunjin. By now, Ryujin is helping Yeji put on the necklace while Yeji is checking her image with the front camera of Jisu’s phone.

“Thank you all so much. I love the necklace,” Yeji says with a bright smile. “And the chocolate of course.”

“You’re welcome,” the girls reply all at once before breaking into laughter at their unintentional synchronization. Hyunjin can’t help but smile at the whole scene. Yeji’s friends are such a cheerful lot and it always catches onto Yeji as well. She’s more carefree, more joyful around them. No matter how much Hyunjin avoids spending time with Yeji’s friends, he will always be grateful for everything they do for her.

“So now that the most important item on the agenda is done, how about we watch a movie?” Ryujin suggests when the laughter quiets down.

“Why do I feel like you already have something specific in mind?” Hyunjin scoots closer to the TV console filled with their CDs, DVDs and so on. It’s mostly old, but nonetheless valued, stuff: movies they already watched as kids, their first CDs and music their parents used to listen too.

“Howl’s moving castle,” Yuna suggests. Her face lights up when Yeji squeals in excitement. It’s Yeji’s favourite movie. Or rather their favourite movie, but Hyunjin doubts he really played a role in that choice. While Hyunjin turns to search for the right DVD, Ryujin switches on the TV. Whitin a second, the light atmosphere sours. Hyunjin grows tense when he looks up at the TV and realises why: the news channel that’s currently on is showing a report about yesterday’s Stray Kids attack. Hearing the words of the news lady makes Hyunjin’s blood freeze solid, even though he already checked the reports. Usually seeing the newscast after their missions isn’t this much of a problem – which is not to say it isn’t difficult – but now, with all of Yeji’s friends here, Hyunjin desperately wants to get away from here as soon as possible. How the hell is he supposed to not expose himself in front of everyone when the newsreader is talking about the injured Private?

“That reminds me.” Yuna’s voice sounds like it’s miles away. “I wanted to ask you how things are going with work. Were you at the attack yesterday?”

“No, sadly not. My unit said I need to really prepare myself first. I don’t want to rush things and end up being a burden to them. I want to make sure I’m actually ready before stepping out with everyone else,” Jisu explains.

“Then where were you during the attack?” Chaeryoung chimes in. Hyunjin can feel himself grow more and more and more nervous every time one of them speaks up. His heartbeat is hammering in his ears. He turns his head directs a pleading look at Yeji, hoping that she will be able to help somehow. But judging by her expression, she doesn’t know how to stop the conversation without being suspicious either. The DIT is an important topic for Yeji’s friends and trying to stop them whenever they talk about it or Stray Kids would soon catch the girl’s attention.

“I stayed in the rooms of the investigation team together with a lot of the other new members. Bang Chan and Park Kwangsun were there too. It was so weird to be around them.” Rather than just weirded out, Jisu sounds outright disgusted though. “I mean I know they were questioned by Lieutenant Yoon and all and officially help us now, but it just feels wrong to trust them. They’ve caused so much damage and harm and yet they were sitting there like regular members of the investigation team.”

The words cut through Hyunjin like knives. It’s so easy to forget what the average citizen thinks of Stray Kids when he’s living his regular life. This is like a hit in the face. If that’s Jisu’s opinion on Nine and Kkul – or rather Bang Chan and Park Kwangsun – what would she think of him who’s still out there going on missions? What would all of them think? Hyunjin takes a look at the girls and feels more and more stings in his heart realising that none of them would let him anywhere near Yeji anymore if they had any idea he’s a member of Stray Kids. When he meets Yeji’s gaze, she seems to know exactly what’s going on in Hyunjin’s head. There’s so much sadness in her eyes. A silent “I’m sorry.” hangs between them, which only makes Hyunjin feel worse. Yeji is the last person who should feel sorry for this situation. She’s the one suffering the most knowing that the most important people in her life are pitted against each other.

“I need to go,” Hyunjin blurts out before his brain can even think about it. “Totally forgot. My boss asked me to come in earlier today and help with stocktaking.”

A frown flickers across Yeji’s face but she’s quick to get it under control again. “Do you really have to go? Can’t someone else do it?”

“I’m afraid not. Sorry, ladies.” It’s hard to endure the pitying looks Ryujin, Yuna, Chaeryoung and Jisu give him. Poor birthday boy can’t even enjoy the party because he has to work. They have no idea. They don’t know anything. Hopefully they never will. “I wish you lots of fun, everyone. Don’t do anything stupid. And leave a piece of cake for me.”

Hyunjin quickly goes to his room and throws his door shut, feeling a bit of relief from just being out of the girls’ view. He releases a shaky breath and tries to collect himself. Hyunjin needs to get out of here as quickly as possible, he can’t bear this any longer. The looks, the talking about Stray Kids, everything. Hyunjin grabs his bag, drapes it over his shoulder, strides towards the door.

“Be careful!” Yeji calls when he’s already halfway through the door.

“Will do!” Bam. Silence. Peace. Loneliness. Now that Hyunjin’s alone in the hallway, he can barely hold back the tears any longer. He tries to stay as quiet as possible while hurrying into the elevator. Only when the doors close does he allow himself to really let go. Hyunjin quickly presses as many buttons as possible before letting himself sink to the ground. More and more sobs shake through his body as he hugs his legs to his chest. He has no idea how Yeji was able to handle this situation. All her friends developed a hatred for Stray Kids, or any sort of resistance really, after what happened to her. Hyunjin can’t even imagine how much pain he would be in if all of his friends hated his sister to death.

[-]

On his way home, Seungmin feels nothing but exhausted. Usually meeting up with I.N is fun, even though they have to be careful not to draw any attention towards them. But after yesterday’s events, I.N was still upset and their meeting became draining. Seungmin had hoped hanging out together would lift his spirits a bit, but it hadn’t done much good. Maybe it had been stupid of Seungmin to think cheering I.N up would be that easy. He shot at somebody else just yesterday. It must have been very traumatic for him. Thankfully, by now news has gotten out that the soldier in question is only mildly injured. Seungmin doesn’t want to know what it would do to I.N if he had caused serious or even lethal harm to someone. He can’t imagine what that would have been like for I.N, knowing he risked or much worse took someone’s life.

Despite the meeting with I.N having been rougher than expected, Seungmin doesn’t feel relieved when he’s standing in front of his home. As much as he loves his family, he doesn’t like being around any of them after missions. Every look, every word riles him up, makes him feel like they’re seeing right through him. It’s ridiculous and Seungmin knows it, but that doesn’t stop this horrible feeling from clawing its way into his chest. He doesn’t bother saying anything when he enters the house. Excellent ears run in the family; everyone knows he’s home. Though rather than a voice, the noise of the TV greets Seungmin. It sounds like a newscast. Damnit. Of course, they’re watching the news. They’re always watching the news. Seungmin walks closer to the living room and peaks through the door, feeling a bit relieved when he realizes the report is about some sports team.

“Where were you?” Seungmin’s mother turns around as soon as she notices him. “You said you were going to be home for dinner.” Right, he did say that. Somehow he had completely forgotten about that while he was with I.N.

“I’m sorry. One of my friends is kind of going through a rough time and needed help.” It’s the closest to the truth Seungmin can be. He hates lying, especially to his family, but saying he helped a friend isn’t actually a lie. In a way he and I.N are friends after all. Though a regular person probably wouldn’t consider someone whose name they don’t know their friend. That doesn’t change anything for Seungmin though. The members mean a lot to him, real names or not.

“During the attack, a member of the DIT was injured. According to the officials, the injury is only minor.”

The words make Seungmin freeze up. He hadn’t noticed when the news had moved on to the recent Stray Kids attack. “Uhm,” he stammers, trying to regain his composure. Damnit, he had managed to avoid seeing news about their missions in the presence of his family for so long. Why did exactly this mission have to break the streak? “Leftovers are in the fridge?” Finally, an idea.

“Yes,” Minseo confirms. “We made sure to leave enough for you.” Her smile is so sweet it hurts Seungmin that it doesn’t feel genuine to him right now. It just stresses him out even more. Thinking that his sister knows what’s going on, where he was or with whom is ridiculous. Minseo has no way of knowing he’s part of Stray Kids and if she did she wouldn’t be sitting here so calmly. But Seungmin can’t help it. When it gets to hiding his identity, he sees the worst everywhere.

“Thanks.” Seungmin turns on his heel and heads into the kitchen. He quickly grabs himself some food for himself and runs upstairs. When he reaches his room, he puts everything down on his desk and lets himself plop down on his chair. Seungmin closes his eyes and gathers himself. He’s alone. He’s safe. Nobody knows he’s DaN. Everything is fine. There’s nothing to worry about.

If only it was really that easy.

[-]

“Damn, I thought I was early,” Yeonjun notes while dropping his bag in front of the lockers. He isn’t entirely wrong. Despite going grocery shopping for lack of a better alternative, Hyunjin ended up coming in a lot earlier than needed. The emptiness of the bar was just too appealing to pass up on. This must be the first time he’s been here before Yeonjun; of course that wouldn’t go unnoticed.

“Ah yeah, my plans for the evening got cancelled so I thought I’d come in a little earlier, clean the counter and all.” Hyunjin is aware of how ridiculous his explanation sounds. Who the hell goes to work when they have free time? As expected, Yeonjun doesn’t seem convinced. Not one bit.

“Sure, because what else would you do when you have some time to spare?” Despite his words, Yeonjun doesn’t push it, instead starting to change into his uniform. Hyunjin turns his head away to give Yeonjun some privacy. Well, as much privacy as one can have while changing in a cramped room with another person in it. “Did you already refill the straws and napkins?”

“Yup.” Hyunjin nods even though Yeonjun probably isn’t looking at him. “Everything done.”

“Great, thanks.” Yeonjun walks over to the mirror, fixes a few strands of his auburn dyed hair before turning towards Hyunjin. “Since we have some time left before costumers come and we have no other job to kill time with, are you going to tell me what you’re running away from?” That much on not pushing it. Of course Yeonjun wouldn’t just let it slide.

“I had a fight with my sister,” Hyunjin lies, despite feeling horrible about telling more lies. The fact that he has gotten so used to this makes it even worse. He just comes up with stuff like this on the spot and is able to keep a straight face like it’s nothing. Admittedly, he isn’t always convincing. That’s only a matter of time though. Hyunjin knows he should be grateful for that ability, but he hates it. “I forgot to do the laundry and things kind of… escalated.” At this point, getting to be honest about things that aren’t related to Stray Kids in any way has become a relief. Something as simple as being allowed to mention Yeji already makes things feel a little easier. More normal. It’s so trivial, but Hyunjin enjoys still getting to speak some truth about himself.

Yeonjun nods despite the fact that he doesn’t really seem to buy it yet again. “And you’re hoping that will solve itself if you go to work?”

“Not exactly, but I needed to get out of our apartment,” Hyunjin explains. At the very least, that part is true. He couldn’t have stayed with the girls a single second longer. “Also, by the time I come home she’s going to be asleep. So we’ll have lots of time to calm down and talk about everything again tomorrow.”

Yeonjun shakes his head at Hyunjin’s reasoning. “If you ask me, you should do that laundry before your sister gets up.”

“Yeah, I’ll try.”

Yeonjun changes the rest of the way in silence. When he’s done, they walk over into the main room. It’s still too early for costumers and since Hyunjin already prepared everything there’s not really anything to do. Thankfully the topic of his alleged fight with Yeji stayed in the locker room. Hyunjin really would not have wanted to try and justify this stupid laundry story any longer. Their chatter now is kind of boring, but Hyunjin definitely prefers that over lies and excuses. For lack of a better way to pass their time, he and Yeonjun start examining the bottles on their work surface, checking which of them are close to empty and will have to be replaced soon. The downside of being busy with the bottles is that their conversation dies down, which leaves Hyunjin way too alone with the negative thoughts and memories of the party.

“Hyunjin-oppa! Finally!” Chaeryoung’s voice has never sounded this troubled, at least Hyunjin has never heard her like this. Of course three missed calls and urgent sounding messages weren’t going to be a good sign, but the panic in her voice seems more extreme than Hyunjin expected.

“What’s going on? What happened?” Every rapid heartbeat made Hyunjin even more nervous. Chaeryoung wouldn’t call him like this if it wasn’t serious. She never calls him. She barely even messages him. And since she apparently insisted on calling him specifically, there was only one possible reason. “Is something wrong with Yeji?”

“Yes she-” Chaeryoung gulped as though it was hard for her to speak. Hyunjin couldn’t take the wait, the moment felt like an eternity. “We’re in the hospital. The Red Cross Hospital. Please come here as soon as you can.” Hospital. Yeji was in hospital. Fuck. Hyunjin couldn’t stop the memories from crashing down on him: following the nurse through the hallways, knocking at the big dark door, walking into the sterile room. The images felt like dozens of bricks pressing down on Hyunjin’s chest. He could barely breathe.

“I’m on my way.” His voice sounded choked up, but Hyunjin couldn’t care less. He needed to see Yeji, see if she was fine. Even if it meant going to a hospital. What could have possibly happened? Part of Hyunjin wished that he had asked more questions, but Chaeryoung hadn’t sounded like she was in the right condition for lengthy explanations. Maybe there wasn’t time either. Fuck, Hyunjin needed to hurry.

The ride was hell to say the least. Hyunjin couldn’t stop himself from being nervous and fidgety. It didn’t help one bit that he had just come home from a mission that was now flickering across the screens in the subway. A weird feeling started spreading through Hyunjin when the news lady started talking about civilians getting hurt. That simply wasn’t possible. There were hardly any people around when they attacked, and the DIT was supposed to keep civilians away, so how would any of them get close enough to get injured? It was probably a lie, propaganda against them. That had to be it.

Getting out of the subway and that damned news report made Hyunjin feel a bit better, but only momentarily. Every step towards his destination made his heart race even faster and chest feel even tighter. Hyunjin hated hospitals. A hospital was the last place he wanted to be at, but there was no way around it. He would have to get his act together. For Yeji.

Hyunjin let himself be led into the waiting room by one of the nurses at the front desk, freezing when he saw Yeji’s friends. The girls looked like they had rolled around on the ground of a construction side. Their hair and clothing were covered in dust. Taking a closer look, Hyunjin noticed their reddened eyes, as though they had been crying. He also spotted several band aids on them and other, smaller cuts that weren’t covered. Ryujin had a bandage around her head. Hyunjin guessed all the adults around the girls were their respective parents. He scanned every face in the room, but Yeji wasn’t here. Oh god.

“Oppa!” Chaeryoung got up and jogged towards him. She talked louder than usual; normally her voice was rather quiet. Hyunjin only now realised it wasn’t just panicked, it was almost like she had headphones on and was trying to talk over music.

“What happened?” Sobbing caught Hyunjin’s attention, making him look up to find Yuna crying into her mother’s shoulder. “Where’s Yeji?”

“Stray Kids, they- they attacked the department of education.” No. No that couldn’t be the reason. They were careful. They were always careful. Yeji and her friends weren’t even inside the building; there’s no way they were hit by the explosion. It just couldn’t be. But the evidence was all around Hyunjin. “We were on our way to run some errands when everything blew up behind us-”

“What about Yeji? Is she okay?” Hyunjin could hear the panic in his own voice by now. He just had to know Yeji was okay already.

“I have no idea,” Chaeryoung admitted. Tears started to flood her eyes once again. She couldn’t seem to look up at Hyunjin any longer. “They’re still operating on her.”

“Costumers.”

“What?” Hyunjin’s head snapped up. Gone are the white walls and blindingly bright lights. The room is dark grey, the light subdued. This isn’t a hospital. Thank god. It takes a while until Hyunjin is able to focus on Yeonjun in front of him. “What did you say?”

Yeonjun doesn’t get to answer since he’s already taking some guy’s order. Still feeling a bit fuzzy, Hyunjin checks his watch. 8.03. They’re actually open by now. He must have zoned out for quite a while. As soon as the costumer is sent off with his drinks, Yeonjun turns towards Hyunjin again. “Had a nice time in dreamland?”

“Not really,” Hyunjin admits. The memory is still heavy like chains around his heart. He really tries his best not to remember that day, but sometimes it all just comes crashing onto him. Tonight is going to be anything but pleasant, Hyunjin already knows that. He never sleeps well on days like this, no matter how tired he is after his shift.

Yeonjun steps closer, speaking in a low voice. “Is this still about your sister?”

“Yeah.” Hyunjin takes a look around, making sure the two only costumers they have are far enough away. “I feel so bad for what happened. I should have just done the laundry and not started a fight about it.” Yes, very convincing. He got overwhelmed by the traumatic experience of fighting over household chores.

“Agreed.” Yeonjun smiles and pats Hyunjin’s back. “Hey, I’m sure if you apologise and do the laundry everything will be fine.”

“I guess you’re right…”

“Of course I am,” Yeonjun sounds almost offended Hyunjin would ever assume anything else. “That’s why you listen to your elders.”

Hyunjin rolls his eyes. “You say it as though you’re some 106 year old wise guy of the town. You’re one year older than me.”

“One year can make a lot of difference.” Yeonjun wags his finger in Hyunjin’s face. “Talk to me again in one year and see how much has changed.” Hyunjin tries to think of a comeback, but before his brain can provide him with anything another group of costumers walks in. Yeonjun winks at Hyunjin before going back to the counter and accepting the first order. Sighing, Hyunjin straightens his back, puts his costumer service smile on and starts helping Yeonjun prepare the drinks.

[-]

They’re really getting training now. Somehow just the thought lets a smile bloom on Kwangsun’s face. After all, none of the higher-ups would have agreed on sending them off to missions if they didn’t trust him and Chan, right? Okay, maybe trust is too strong of a word for that, but it’s definitely a good sign. In their situation every little step forward should be celebrated. Especially steps like this.

Kwangsun has a slight skip in his step as he walks into the kitchen, starting to look for stuff he can use to cook dinner for them. Though since they haven’t been grocery shopping in a while, there’s not really a lot to work with. They only have rice and noodles to be precise. Yup, plain rice would make a great celebration meal. Maybe Kwangsun should go grocery shopping? It’s not that late yet, he could go buy more ingredients to cook some proper meal for them. Kimchi jjigae would be awesome. If he’s already out and about, he should buy more than just the ingredients though. Some snacks wouldn’t hurt either. And they’re short on tissues and apple juice. Is there anything else? Kwangsun feels like he’s forgetting something. Don’t they need more shampoo too? Or is it soap? The answer feels within his reach but Kwangsun can’t quite grasp it.

“Chan-ah?” he calls, already leaving the kitchen. There’s no way both of them forgot, right? Plus, Chan might have wishes of his own, which Kwangsun would be happy to fulfil if Chan just replied. Still starved for a reply, Kwangsun walks down the hallway and opens the door to Chan’s room. “I’m going gro-”

Kwangsun freezes in the door frame, completely still. He forgot to knock, which was a mistake. Chan specifically requested it when they moved in. How did he not remember something that simple? Just having come out of the shower, Chan is still shirtless. That by itself really wouldn’t be a big deal if it wasn’t for the long, faint pink lines raking over Chan’s back. Most of them crisscross over his spine at the height of his ribcage, but some extend to his shoulders as well as lower back.

Chan’s entire back is covered in scars.

It only now dawns upon Kwangsun that he’s never seen Chan without a shirt, not even when in the practice room today. How did Chan even manage to change that quickly? And how come Kwangsun hadn’t realized how much Chan must have hurried to hide this? Or questioned how urgently Chan had insisted that Kwangsun knocks whenever he enters his room?

“What the fucking hell are you doing here?!” The aggression in Chan’s voice is so foreign. He’s never sounded like this, not during missions or while discussing plans or anything. Kwangsun’s heart drops to his knees. Chan is scary right now. His jaw is set and his face pulled into a scowl. His gaze has an intensity that has Kwangsun’s throat go dry. This is bad, this is really bad. Chan stumbles backwards and presses himself against his closet while trying to cover himself with the shirt in his hands. The mixture of anger and horror on Chan’s face makes Kwangsun feel like a monster, as though he murdered Chan’s family right in front of his very eyes.

“I’m sorry, I-” Kwangsun can’t seem to form proper words. He honestly has no idea what he would even say except apologising for barging into Chan’s room like that. Though he feels like an apology won’t cut it.

“Get out!” Chan screams, losing his patience. Kwangsun has never heard Chan yell before. “Get the hell out! Leave me alone!” He comes closer as though he’s planning to personally drag Kwangsun out of the room. Kwangsun nods hastily and rushes outside as quickly as possible. His heart is racing like crazy when the door slams shut behind him. The abstract painting on the wall next to Kwangsun trembles with the force of it.

“And fucking knock next time!”

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