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ros3ybabe · 22 hours

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🎀 Overcoming Gym Anxiety 🎀

I got asked about this through my inbox by @sxfiaaa so I figured I'd make a post about it and hopefully help a lot of people with something I too used to struggle with!

🩷 Wear Comfortable Clothing

We've all seen the beautifully dressed people on Tiktok, Pinterest, etc in their matching sets and cutr gym clothes. If that is what you're comfortable wearing to the gym, do it! Wear it, and be confident in it! If you're more of a loose clothes/sweatpants/baggy shirts or hoodie type of person, do that! Wear whatever you feel comfortable (and cute) in, because the better you feel going into a workout, the more you'll be able to focus on your workout!

🩷 Know What You're Doing When You're There

This just means go in with a plan! You don't need to know how to use every single machine or do every single exercise known to mankind. Scroll tiktok or pinterest for some workout videos for inspo (please make sure the video you get inspo from shows proper form!!! Proper form is so important for being safe!!)

If you know you can go certain days of the week, make a workout split to follow that! EX 3 day split: Monday - Leg Day, Wednesday - Upper Body, Friday - Full Body

OR, if you just want to go do cardio, then plan for that! I didn't know how to use a treadmill, but I went to the gym at my university and stood on the treadmill til I figured it out!

🩷 Remember This

No one is going to look at you and judge you or think mean things about you. Everyone is at the gym for the purpose of bettering themselves and their health. If you find people giving you occasional glances, maybe it's because they don't recognize you from the gym (or they do recognize you from somewhere else), maybe their admiring your outfit/physique, maybe their avid gym goers who are watching your form and technique, or maybe their just zoned out and you happen to be in the line of sight.

When I'm at the gym, I look around between sets and take note on other people's form to see if maybe I should tweak the way I do a certain exercise, or I'm admiring another girls outfit or physique because there are a lot of beautiful women at the gym. Sometimes, I'm thinking "dang, they're lifting so heavy, how cool!" or "wow, their form is amazing, they really know what they're doing." I've never thought bad abut someone at the gym because why would I?

🩷 Don't Be Scared To Ask For Help

if there an exercise you really want to do but don't know how and videos aren't helping, ask someone around you who isn't in the middle of an exercise and looks like they may know. The guy at the gym doing upper body who has good biceps may be the right guy to ask about upper body exercises. The girl doing impeccable Bulgarian Split Squats might be the right person to ask for help with those types of movements. Just make sure they aren't in the middle of an exercise, because that can cause some unwanted issues, especially if they're mid-rep, that can turn into a safety issue.

People love to help people, especially at the gym. If you politely ask for help from someone, they may take it as a compliment that you think they look like a person who is knowledgeable on working out. I'd definitely be so flattered if someone asked me for help or advice at the gym!

🩷 Random Advice:

remember your why! no matter how anxious you are, remember why you're going! what are your goals, what do you hope to achieve, how proud will you feel after?

start small if you have to! if it's really anxiety inducing to start working out, make it your first goal to at least step into the gym. then 2nd goal, walk around the gym to get a feel for it. 3rd goal, maybe 5-10 minutes on a treadmill, and then keep building momentum each day.

be careful with the hours you go! there is such a thing as peak gym hours. It varies by place, but a lot of gyms are busy between 2pm and 6pm I've seen. I personally love going to the gym super early morning, it's a little less busy and I'm a morning person so it works out for me! If you can only go during peak hours, bring a friend or keep your headphones on and do your thing!

Bring a friend! If you're really anxious about going alone, bring a friend with similar goals! Sometimes it can be a lot nicer to learn something new with a friend then try and learn it on your own! Plus, it's like extra motivation and accountability!

Have a motivating pre workout routine. Play some music while getting ready, prep your bags, prep your playlist, get your workout itself figured out, and just keep yourself excited to go! I love blasting high-energy music that makes me feel like a baddie on my way to the gym.

I hope this was helpful!! My thoughts were everywhere but I tried to convey them as best as possible! I'm happy to answer any questions or offer more tips and advice, don't feel scared to ask! <3

til next time lovelies 🩷

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raayllum · 4 hours

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Anyway time to talk about the 6x03 poem:

As many others have speculated judging by the map, Captain Skall made her way to Hook named after her, and then "as east she sailed into waters so deadly and cold" in the Frozen Shards, her ship eventually being stuck and meeting her doom there.

With that out of the way, I want to talk about other pieces of info, why this might be the poem for 6x03 specifically, and where I think Skall may fit timeline wise:

"From the isles without name" makes me think of the Independent Isles in between Evenere and Katolis.

"sailing north, she called herself free" makes me feel feral with Callum (and Rayla) doing the same in hopes of freeing Callum from Aaravos' grasp by destroying the prison

"Through forests and flowers, past the uneven towers" clearly symbolizes Katolis, indicating that Skall lived once most of the human kingdoms had been established, and thereby post-Exile/Exodus.

"Skall hungered for glory, she wanted a story / they’d tell it long after she died". Routinely we see a desire for glory / worthiness / power described as hunger ("Hungry for knowledge and power" / "But that small taste left some humans hungry—starved, even—for a better path. An easier path. And thus Elarion became the birthplace of a new form of magic, a shortcut to primal power: dark magic"). This also comes into seeking a legacy.

"So with winter wind’s blowing / she sailed north, forgoing / a man who’d have made her his bride". This is where we see the poem take a more negative slant in a few ways. The first is winter, wind, and north, setting up a future unfortunate turn of events. This is also the first mention of Skall having something else in her life other than adventure and something she had to subsequently abandon. While the end of the poem is much more on her side of feelings, "forgoing" does mean "renouncing; sacrificing or giving up" something that is more positive.

"Alone in the cold, yet ever so bold" again adds to the more negative feeling the poem is building, as boldness is in the contrast with "alone in the cold" that's overall negative and maintaining a bit more of an upkeep. Likewise, we see the return of the wind with an even more negative connotation in wailing in the following stanza: "And oh, winter wailed / as east she sailed / into waters so deadly and cold". We see the return of cold but also the change into things being 'deadly' (although there were still hints of danger earlier, as 'bold' indicates).

"Then came the ice, and trapped in its vise" The cold finally catches up to her, and we see ice return as a form of entrapment (2x06, 3x08, 3x09, 5x04, 5x06, 5x08). Most interestingly, "vise" is a tool with closable jaws for clamping things. Maybe the ice is magical, or the jaw of a great (the dragon we've seen in the trailer) creature?

"And while she found peace / she wished that, at least / she’d told him she loved him, always". While the poem ends on a somewhat bittersweet end (at death but at peace), we do see that Skall died with a final regret to the man she could've wed but left instead.

Or you could say, a last wish.

Either way, the poem paints a rather grim journey: going North didn't hold the same freedom and achievements that Skall hoped for, and instead led to entrapment, separation, and death.

That said: there's a few Rayllum-y things I think we can glean from this poem, for starters:

1) The episode will likely have a strong focus on Callum and Rayla sailing to and/or through the Frozen Sea on whatever ship they're planning to use to get there. This leaves 6x02 "Love, War, and Mushrooms" more open to either explore other plot lines or another pit stop in their journey (like say, the Silvergrove)

2) The poem itself has pretty clear Rayllum parallels, specifically in TDP's continual gender subversion of the women who puts other things above her romantic relationship, even if it's likewise seen as a sacrifice. Rayla left Callum in order to protect him/the world from Viren, even if that meant damaging their relationship, and Skall puts her desire for glory and adventure over presumably a more settled married life at home. (Excuse me while I scream over "forgoing a man who'd have made her his bride.")

3) The poem likewise has some parallels to Rayla's "Dear Callum" letter specifically. There are wishes expressed of the leaving party, a desire to have made feelings more plain that Callum reiterates in 5x04 when they think they're about to die ("I hope you know—" "I know"), and most notably, a parallel to the always mention:

she wished that, at least she’d told him she loved him, always.

But, if it does—if you feel that soft aching—know that that piece of your heart isn’t missing. It’s not missing at all, Callum: I’m carrying it with me! Always. I love you. I love you so much.

4) All this bodes quite well for 6x03 being an episode with a big Rayllum moment in it — perhaps even their Big "You Finally Came Back" Talk — especially since there's not much else to (presumably) happen on a ship if they're just travelling somewhere (and not being pursued this time).

Episode Speculation (a summary / misc thoughts)

Callum and Rayla travelling to the Frozen Sea

Big Talk happens

+ potential love confession / reaffirmation?

They reach the other end of the Frozen Sea

Maybe fight the big dragon from the video game teaser we see with Rayla (like Skall, she has literal hooks = blades) whose guarding or in their way to the Starscraper? Could account for the jaws and maybe the ice

One of them is worried and/or has a moment of thinking the other person is hurt/injured bc of said dragon fight?

Maybe some Aaravos backstory in his lost love (although like I said, I don't think it's Skall exactly — I still think the likeliest names are Elara-adjacent or Kalik)

Episode Title Speculation (in about this order):

The Frozen Sea

By River and Sea

Always (this would be my personal favourite and i would never stop screaming)

#tdp #the dragon prince #analysis series #the english major strikes again #tdp meta #analysis #rayllum #s6 spoilers #tdp spoilers #6x03 #s6 speculation #predictions #+ bonus 'i love you with all of myself. i always will' & 'you know i'm always here for you right?'

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hazbinfallinginaspiral · 2 days

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Hey!

Loved First Date (Retro!Reader X Vox)

I was wondering if you planned a follow on from that! I'd love to see more, like Vox introducing them to the other Vees or something!

Thanks for the hard work! Don't rush yourself!

“Don’t worry, you’ll do fine,” Vox said softly, squeezing my hand lightly.

“Are you sure? What if they don’t like me?” I asked, looking up at him. I was worried. These were the people he was closest to- besides me, but I hadn’t known him for long.

“They’ll love you,” he said gently. He leaned over and gave me a quick kiss, then pulled away with a knowing grin. “C’mon, let’s go inside.”

Before I could protest, he dragged me through the door and into the meeting room. Yes, he had arranged for me to meet his two business partners and best friends in a fancy room with a long table and fifty chairs. I was intimidated. Fuck fuck fuckkkkk.

“I don’t see what all the fuss is about, I can do vintage too you know,” one of them said with a huff, not realizing we’d walked in . Her hair was up in twin tails, she was fashionable, and she was taking a selfie. That one must be Velvette.

“It’s not vintage, it’s retro, and they’re different,” the other person said. He was unbelievably tall, like damn, save some height for the rest of us. He wore a pink top hat with two of his antennas sticking out, one of them damaged. He was bedazzling a pistol. “Honestly if you didn’t know there was a difference, I can see why you’re missing the mark with your fashion line.”

“Hey. Don’t insult my fashion,” Velvette snapped, slamming her phone down. “I could say just as many things about those sloppy new performers you hired.”

Vox cleared his throat, gripping my arm tightly before Valentino could respond. “Excuse me,” Vox said, sounding strained. He didn’t appear to be happy with these first impressions. “We have a guest.”

“What?” Velvette asked, turning her attention to me.

I was hiding partially behind Vox now. Valentino squinted, trying to see me clearly. I sort of poked my head out from behind Vox and looked at the two anxiously.

“Come on now, no seas tímida,” Valentino purred, gently setting down the rhinestones and glue gun. I stepped into view for him so he could see me, still standing close to Vox. “There we go. Come a little closer so I can see you properly, won’t you, mi cariño?”

I looked to Vox, who gave me a small smile and nudged me forward. I was completely out of my element here. “Sorry,” I mumbled, walking over to the table. Vox followed close behind, Velvette already seemed to be judging me. Seemingly by my walk alone.

“There’s no need to apologize,” Val said sweetly, standing up to welcome me. Goddamn this man was an entire ass tree. Fuck. And he was wearing heels??? He needed to be stopped. Why was he so fucking tall. I was like, half his fucking height. Fuck fuck fuck. “The names Valentino, it’s a pleasure to meet you.”

He wrapped one of his four arms around my waist and started to make me walk around the room with him. He didn’t seem to have a good attention span, in fact, he was almost.. restless.

“Uh hi,” I said quietly, fidgeting nervously with the hem of my sleeve. “People down here just call me Retro.”

“Retro, hmm?” He stopped for a moment and bent down, inspecting me. I decided I did not like him, if not for his height alone, but for the way he was looking at me. Almost as if I was fresh meat. “That’s a bit on the nose, isn’t it? What was your name when you were living? Could you-” Vox cut him off, clearing his throat pointedly as if to say ‘cut it out’. Val stopped and looked at him for a moment, then pouted. “Fine. Say, Voxy, could you get me a light? Today’s been a shitshow.”

“A light as in a lamp or…?” Vox asked, raising an eyebrow playfully. Valentino huffed and crossed his top two arms, one of his lower ones still wrapped around my waist, the other holding a cigarette. Vox laughed softly, gave him a wink and zapped the cigarette with a bit of electricity, lighting it up.

“You’re not as funny as you think,” Valentino said dryly. “Anyway!” He picked me up and twirled me around abruptly, maneuvering me in a sudden dance.

“Val!”

“Oh shit,” Velvette said, taking out her phone. “This’ll be good.”

I did my best to move along with him. What was he even dancing to? This felt like a test. Fuck. I would have to tell Vox that his friends are weird. God I had no idea what o was doing. “I- uh, I don’t know how to dance,” I said nervously as I tried to follow along. “Sorry.”

“No worries, you’re doing wonderful, hermosa,” Val said with a smile. It seemed genuine. He kept trying to make more sexual and intimate moves, but I was able to avoid it fairly well. A casual side step or transition into another move entirely did the trick. Before he could say another word, though, Vox yanked me away, almost harshly.

“Ah, fuck,” I muttered, stumbling a bit. I nearly crashed into Vox, but I was able to stop myself just short. He shot me an apologetic glance, then glared at Valentino.

“Careful, Val,” he said, his voice filled with underlying menace. “We wouldn’t want to make our guest uncomfortable.”

“Spoilsport,” Valentino mumbled, rolling his eyes. He took a drag of his cigarette and blew a puff of smoke in my direction. I felt myself relax a bit. “You’ve got yourself quite the catch, you know. How did you say you found this stray again?”

Velvette had stopped recording and come up behind me. She tugged on my arm gently guiding me away from Vox and Val, beginning to take my measurements. “You’re quite the looker, you know,” she said quietly, mostly to herself. I didn’t resist her at all, I just sort of absentmindedly obliged with whatever she was doing. “It’s no wonder Vox likes you so much. God, he never shuts up about you.”

“Velvette,” Vox growled. A warning. Valentino came up to me again, helping Vel with the measurements. He ruffled my hair gently and blew another cloud of smoke at me, this time, directly in my face. “Valentino, stop that!”

“What? It’s just a bit of harmless fun,” Velvette said with a grin. She wrapped her arm around my shoulder and pulled me up against her. I felt dizzy and dazed. “I think I’ll have them as a model. Maybe they could perform for Val sometime. They’d make for a better show than those sloppy strippers he just hired.”

“Nobody is- no! Stop that,” Vox said, his screen flickering. He pushed the two aside and held me close to him, now more protective. “They aren’t a toy!”

“Maybe not, but you know the rules,” Valentino said slyly, putting out his cigarette. “The Vees always share.”

“Well not this time! Not today,” Vox said, holding me tight. His nails dug into my skin. I didn’t really notice. I was hardly aware of the conversation at all anymore. I watched Val put out his cigarette, feeling slightly disappointed but not knowing why. The smoke had been so pretty… “Retro is mine, got that?”

“Whatever you say,” Val said, rolling his eyes.

“No games, no tricks,” Vox said. “Nothing like that. Don’t mess with them.”

“Fine! I get it.”

“Good.” Vox linked his arm in mine and led me away, out of the room. “Come on, let’s get you some rest. Val’s smoke really did a number on you.”

#hazbin hotel #vox #hazbin hotel vox #hazbin vox #writing #my writing #vox x reader #reader insert #x reader #vox fanfiction #hazbin valentino #hazbin hotel valentino #hazbin hotel velvette #hazbin velvette

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taranida · 3 days

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Tom the Poet or Tom the Filmmaker

I would like all my theories to have evidence that back them up. I’ve come from fandoms where things said are a cute thing, worth considering, but solid theorising comes with quotes, screenshots, counting toes and following the writer’s pattern of three hint and foreshadowings before the big reveal. Therefore, I’m going through the first game yet again to collect all this information and put it in something coherent, something I will be happy with. I hope that the waves of my research will carry me to the proper essay with all the proofs necessary on every statement I’ve made in my first pinned post.

But there are still questions that have no answers as far as I know. One of them: why Tom Zane was made into a filmmaker and by whom?

In Control’s AWE the cutscene where Tom and Alan meet is a toned-down version of their encounter in Room 665. Alan asks if Tom is the Tom, the poet and the diver and Tom replies that it was just a beloved character in his old film. They have the same conversation at the start of Room 665 in Alan Wake II.

Alan seemed always forget that he (or someone else) changed Tom’s identity to filmmaker, still convinced that Thomas Zane he encountered at the start of his journey was a poet and a diver. First, when Tom-the-filmmaker was introduced, I thought that Alan forgot who Zane was and what he learned about him (I wouldn’t put it past Alan: he forgot many things he wrote, even his birthdate somewhat slipped his mind — in 2010 or in the Dark Place; the guide for the first game states that he’s 31, when the statue near the Parliament Tower claims he was born in 1977), but in both cases he kept insisting that Tom was a poet. So, the opposite is true: Alan forgot that Tom now is a filmmaker.

But why is Tom made to be a filmmaker? Even the second game insists that the Tom was a poet: Cynthia notes this in her journal, marvelling at why everyone thinks that he was a filmmaker; even the boys of Old Gods of Asgard say “you need him [Tom] to write the ending,” “art, like Tom’s writing” and “it’s Tom’s story we are dealing with, he’s gotta be the one to rewrite it”. And they are the only three people who knew the real Tom Zane and have some credibility in what he really was: a poet or a filmmaker.

The boys, of course, are a discussion on their own; Tom and Alan are interchangeable in their heads, they might talk about Alan the writer, hence “write, writing, story, rewrite”, but Cynthia has no such issues. She never mistook Alan for Tom, she loved Tom her whole life, devoted to his wishes and for sure wouldn’t mess such a big part of his identity in her head.

Then we have This House of Dreams, where we can read poems, some of them are by Thomas Zane and the Bright Presence shows Samantha that he was indeed a poet. Let’s add Jesse Faden into the mix, who as well, remembers Thomas Zane being a poet and even recites one of his poems in Control’s recordings. She still believes he was a poet somewhere around 2019, judging by her words about her needing to be in New York soon. Only in AWE DLC when she hears Tom claiming he’s a filmmaker, she changes her mind. But at this time, she’s already in yet another Alan’s story, her beliefs shaped by his writing (or by the words of her therapist and this vision of Tom and Alan; take your pick).

So, the question remains: why was Tom made a filmmaker?

My belief here is that Alan (or Scratch — do not confuse with Mr. Scratch) had no need of a poet. In This House of Dreams we see two sets of poems: one is by Thomas Zane and another is by Alan himself, in Control’s AWE Alan also claims that he wrote poems, and what value can Tom-the-poet add to Alan’s attempts to escape? A filmmaker on the other hand, as Tom says in AWII, can make a companion piece for his manuscript. Hence the filmmaker, the auteur.

As a side note. I do believe that the real Thomas Zane never makes his appearance in any games, first we see the Bright Presence possessing the body of Tom, then we see yet another Alan’s face in the Dark Place, that takes shape of what he believes Tom Zane was, and this part of Alan becomes a filmmaker at some point in his journey. After all, as the real Tom once wrote:

When you’re lost You’re lost in your own company

#thomas zane #tom zane #alan wake #alan wake 2 #remedy entertainment #control game #control remedy #alan wake ii #RCU theory

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spicyclematis · 7 months

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it's giving high fasyun 💅 for @raplinenthusiasts

#me making this set: why are they judging me #yoongi #hoseok #namjoon #bts #btsgif #btsedit #trackofthesoul #cypnernet #bangtan #usersky #annietrack #bts rap line #tw flashing #ofc this one's for julia like who else i can associate with #actually i wanted to use the marie claire one for yoongi but #it doesn't match namseok because it had softer concept #mygifs

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fictionadventurer · 29 days

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Maybe the problem with Christian fiction is that it's non-denominational. People are just "Christian", with no effort put into showing what practicing that religion looks like for them specifically. No indication that there are other Christians who could have different beliefs. No wrestling with differing ideas and the struggle of how one should live out their Christian faith. And that makes it unrealistic and unrelatable.

#me reading any christian historical fiction set in england: why are none of these gentry anglican??#they ARE all anglican and if they are not it is extremely plot and character relevant you can't just have them using evangelical buzzwords #but i'm also thinking of this because i started another charlotte yonge book #that is by far my favorite of the things of hers that i've read #because it has characters who have different upbringings and religious opinions #instead of just 'here's a bunch of high church anglicans judging people who don't live up to their victorian standard'#you have the very high church anglican rector whose wife is worldly but still a very good person #the girl raised in a very strict protestant family who is more scrupulous than the anglicans but is still recognized as a good person #you have people who are trying to work out the nuances of different issues #and that makes it so much more realistic and so much easier to integrate into the story #(the politics though are hilarious)#(most of the classics that survive are the ones that were 'ahead of their time' in politics)#(so it's equally fascinating and refreshing and a bit infuriating to see one that is very very of its time with regards to women's rights)#('why did this woman get up at the meeting and explain her very good ideas for rebuilding after the fire? she should have had a man do it')#(meanwhile i'm just screaming 'why on earth SHOULDN'T she???')#(it's almost enough to make a feminist of me)

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icewindandboringhorror · 1 year

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I know multiple of these are likely important to people, but I'm asking in terms of like - which of these do you tend to focus on the MOST, enjoy the most, that is most essential for you to actually care about the media, etc.?

(For example: someone finding "Relatability" most important would likely not enjoy a show much if they have trouble empathizing with the characters/relating to it, even if it were good otherwise. Or, someone might be able to overlook bad acting and ugly costumes, as long as the Character Dynamics are fun to them, because they value that more than Aesthetics- while for others, bad costumes would be a dealbreaker.)

Also feel free to reblog and explain your answer or more information in the tags- I've always been curious about people's relationships to media, how they conceptualize it/what they get out of it, how some people value some parts more than others, how that informs their overall taste and genres they may be more inclined towards, etc. :0c

#I was having a conversation with a friend about our favorite type of media and they said the reason they DON'T like historical or fantasy #media or etc. is because they can't imagine themselves being in those situations like it's too detached from anything that they can relate #to personally. they put themselves in the shoes of the characters and apparently like feel emotions while watching stuff and actually #get into the way the characters are feeling so they kind of judge how 'good' or 'bad' a show's writing/setting/etc. are by how it makes #them feel and if they think the characters reacted realistically based on what they were feeling in the moment/what in their head they #would be feeling if they were in the postion of the character. SO apparently the distance of it being in an unrelatable setting or too #detached from our reality makes it harder for them to relate to and less able to really engage with it on that level. WHEREAS I watch #things exclusively in a very like.. detached way?? I'm INTERESTED.. it's like im intellectually analyzing everyhting that's happening and #can be intrigued by events but it's not in an emotional way? More of like a distant 'intellectual curiosity'. Maybe the premise or the #aesthetics or something about it has piqued an interest for me to observe it. to see what it's like or how it plays out. how the idea #is executed or etc. But like.. I cannot remember EVER really relating to any character or situation or projecting onto a character #or having those sorts of feelings or investment in it. That is just not a central part of why/how I watch things or what I care about #BUT after this I was thinking maybe this is my disconnect? I do not seem to conceptualize media the way some other people do and I often #walk away with an entirely different take on things. etc. So I wonder if maybe it's part of how everyone values different things probably?#maybe I literally just watch stuff and percieve it from a different frame of mind that others. More of a like detached curiosity #vaguely bemused analysis mode. Instead of a 'I am deeply emotionally invested in this and am feeling for all the characters' mode #And also I bet people who care more about plot/story are also the people who mind spoilers. Whereas for me I literally seek out spoilers #intentionally because that element of 'suprise ooh what will happen next!' is not central at all to my enjoyment. I could know literally #everything that will happen and still can find it interesting to observe - since for me #that's not the point. I'd rather know the ending so I can determine whether I want to invest the time in it in the first place. etc.#ANYWAY!! If I had to choose - I would say I'm usually heavily focused on world details and aesthetics. With only a slight preference #towards characters individually being interesting. Group dynamics can sometimes be okay but I get tired of everything being about relations #hips and romance - especially when sometimes it seems to be like. people who could not stand on their own as a character/are fundamentally #boring otherwise lol. I would watch a series of just one guy locked in a closet talking to himself as long as he was interesting and saying #things that were amusing or notable for some reason lol. I actually tend to dislike plot because most 'plot heavy' things like action focus #ed shows ALWAYS feel to me like they're moving so fast just to get from one thing to another that I'm not getting enough details. Part of #why I tend to not like movies. the time limit makes them too quick. I need a 95 hour expostion dump of the history of the entire world #and a series of 17 episodes straight where a guy is trapped in a room & the audience is just psychoanalyzing him. hghj.. Maybe I find all #characters annoying/unrelatable bc people w my personality type make bad characters/are not often represented (or are done BADLY). so then #I'm just picking 'who is the LEAST insufferable? who could i study like a lab rat?' whilst my main focus is the worldbuilding&costumes lol

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shoutsindwarvish · 1 year

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there are two wolves inside me

#well-done autistic character #one of the main characters no less! with a character arc unrelated to his autism!#almost entire cast is poc #specifically give romans an american accent (interesting choice that i particularly enjoy)#all characters are deadpan snarkers and majority are delightful disasters #simon peter is blorbo #judas is baby #andrew is doing his best #third season especially does a great job setting up plots that are seemingly unrelated and bringing them all together #and it's actually the exception rather than the rule that i feel dallas (the creator) looking in the camera #and reminding me that it's made from an evangelical lens #(at least imho)#and i can be like 'i pretend i do not see it'#(probably will be able to do that less and less the closer we get to the passion but i'm probably going to stick around until the end)#anyway i might post some memes so please don't judge me my friends #i'll tag them accordingly #my posts #i make me laugh #you might ask why i started in the first place and the answer is that bible adaptations are my guilty pleasure #(i've explained why in a different post)#and this one went from ironic to unironic

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risingsunresistance · 5 months

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where do all of you go when i reblog cool art. ATTACK!!!

#WHY ARE ALL MY NOTES ONLY FUN TEXT POSTS I REBLOG WHERE IS THE LOVE FOR THE ARTISTS #i cant control you but i can silently judge you JDHDJ do what you want i guess 😒#when someone's art makes me set my phone down for a second and i check my notes and it got two likes #i need to reblog art 500 times i need to let it be known that i love it so much i want everyone else to also love it >:(#chat

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tortademaracuya · 9 months

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It feels undeserving 👍

#once again thinking if i should like. not tell anyone #not tell anyone when the festival will be held nor my thesis defense #dont tell anyone absolutely anyone so no one can come see me #whyshould i make people waste time on seeing probably one of the worst things i have worked on #i feel. judged everyday. nothing is as good as it should be #this does not feel like a feat but rather a terrible shame #who cares about my degree i always feel like im being shamed when someone broughts up the fact im working on my thesis #i like what i study. dont get me wrong. and i dont think this in general. this is a me only issue and iknow that #and i know everyone would get upset with me #not like my mind cares haha the thoughts wont stop even if i try to be rational #i feel like such a terrible burden just asking for help. i feel like everyones thinking what a disappointment i am #i shouldnt need help. i should be doing this alone. and it should be way better than the garbage im making #last class the professors asked me 'why did u rate yourself so low? your work is fine'#i didnt even pick the low option i wanted. i picked a higher one to be generous with myself. i wish i had picked a 1. thats what i deserved #even if they say it looks good or that they r excited to see what i make. it all sounds like lies in my head #no one showing up is what i deserve. i shouldnt ask for help. i shouldnt celebrate anything #i wish people would yell at me and tell me what a fuck up i am #'the people that love you would be excited to help you if you would actually let them'#it all feels like a set up for showing what an idiot i am #haunted.txt

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butchvamp · 11 months

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the longer this story gets the more certain i am that it is incoherent gibberish

#idk why this feels so massive to me when my other project is like. 700k lmfao #but i think the fact its branching makes it easier to break up #this is like. wow im actually writing a novel. a cohesive linear story. HUH #i think im around 50k? not sure cus i have my files scattered all over the place like an asshole #i think it's going to end up around 90-100k if not more #i still have 11 more chapters to go #um. idk i guess my plan rn is to just finish it and then do a quick edit of each chapter separately and compile it all #and then set it aside and come back to it after a bit and actually read the whole thing. and then edit again #but i have to finish it first so lol #idk i feel insane. it's hard to judge my own writing

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gayspock · 2 years

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ive been feelinglike such shit lately & bro this assignment is not helping -_-

#Egg.txt #i feel silly but im so easily overwhelmed...#im also so confused #like this is a module im really interested in but (pulls out autistm card) smiles im bewildered as whats even expected of us #i dont understand why there's so much content thats not even covered by the assignment #but the assignment itself is also so vague i dont ... get it #and im scared im misunderstanding everything .... -_-#its so sad bc i rlly love this module and i actually kinda would like to be tested on it .. and to write essays about what we've learnt #but like. the assignment thats 100% is ?? on barely any of it?#and only half? related?#and again im so confused & im feeling stupid... sigh #and its not. good. bc this module is sth i had interest in so whilst its only 10 creds .. if i DID apply to a masters in this field they #might look @ my script and judge that if i get a bad mark...#but ehrm.#and again the assignment just involves so much set up that im struggling with and i feel silly bc its nothing to do with the assignment man #like can you give me. a clear explanation of exactly what u want from me and why you want it. LOL.#and i cant ask questions bc the nice lecturer is now on holiday and the nortoriously . awful one. is the only one who i can email... :(#i think im just sad & stressed & miserable all over LOL -_-#im trying to go through the lectures but they feel like such a waste of time trtying to make notes bc none of this is even relevant!??!?!?!#and its like- i LIKE being taught all of this but im panicking bc i feel like im wasting my time and effort and .... eutgh

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xinsanitysxedgex · 2 years

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xbloodiedxkneesx asked: Truth or dare with the girls & honey & someone dares Zima to kiss Gummy? yes pls. *grab hands*

"Hmmmmnnhh~~... GOOMIE."

Zima's heart dropped as that nasally voice of what Rosa called a FRIEND announced her target. GULP. "W-What?" She looked around, panicked, from Gummy to Istina to Rosa, hoping one of 'em, ANY OF 'EM, would step in here. She had little faith in Leto or Beehunter who were ALREADY cheering on with that annoying af schoolgirl "Oooooh~~..." bullshit. "Why should Gummy hafta kiss me? It's my dare, shouldn't we do dares SOLO?" She was just clutching at straws at this point. She'd do anything. But things with Lada had been TOO ON EDGE ever since that night. Not helped by the girl's jokes of WHIPPING HER.

Sigh from Elena, judgmental and indignant. "Really...? THIS is what you guys have become? I don't know why I ever expect better from you all..." Meanwhile, Jinx just watched on in anticipation, smiling big and bright, revelling in the chaos. Honestly, she just wanted the night ot go this way in case SOMEONE wanted to get a little revenge and make her kiss Rosa next~... (She'd been duhrinking, too~~ WHAT A HEIST!!) Of course, first they had to somehow get this whole thing past Rozzi. But what the Hell was a mercenary s'posed ta do? Who cared if she was meant to be ranked ABOVE THEM, as an INSTRUCTOR? She was still just a hired hand. (Weren't they all hired hands? SHUT IT, YOU STUPID ROCKET LAUNCHER.) And, at least for now, she was merely observing from across the room, sipping on her own wine glass.

Zima licked her lips, heart racing, was the lick out of ANXIETY or ANTICIPATION? She'd never kissed ANYONE before. Jeez, she was fucking PETRIFIED, could Terran just open up and swallow her WHOLE? "Tell 'em, Gummy. Tell 'em it's not fair. Can't I do a, umm... A whatsitcalled." DAMMIT. THINK. BRAIN. THINK. "A punishment thing? Like y'all make me eat hot sauce or some shit, I dunno... I just... I don't think this is--" EYES WIDEN EDas Jinx called her a PUSSY. "I'm not! It's got nothing to do with that! Unlike SOME PEOPLE, we take our first kisses VERY seriously." BLUSH. Had she just admitted that out loud? Okay. Fingers crossed her dreams come to life and she dies tonight.

#WHY IS ROZZI HERE YOU ASK?#HONESTLY BECAUSEI ALREADY SET UP THE TEMPLATE FOR FOUR BEFORE I REALIZED THAT NATSUKI WOULDNT' FIT IN THE CONTINUITY AT THIS TIME HAHAHAHA #SOOO SHE'S HERE NISTEAD #WE'LL SEE WHAT HAPPENS WITH HER HAHAHAHH BUT JINX TRYNA INCITE CHAOS #ELENA JUDGING THEM #AND ZIMA HAVING FULL GAY PANIC EPISODE AND MAYBE HURTING GUMMY'S FEELIGNS HAHAHAHAHA #IM NOT SUREEE #WE SHALL SEEE #HOEP THI SWORKKKSSS AND LIVES UP TO WHAT YOU THOUGHT IT MIGHT BE #AHAHAHAHLKNDDLKSFRENLKFDKNLDNLKFLNK FDSNLK FNLFD #ISTINA LETO AND BEEHUNTER ARE ALSO PRESENT #-⚕⚕- ELENA -⚕⚕- I'm Doing This For Your Own Damn Good. You'll Make Up For What I Blew. What's The Problem? Why Are You Crying?#-⚕⚕- ELENA X ROSA -⚕⚕- We All Had Delusions In Our Heads. We All Had Our Minds Made Up For Us. We Had To Believe In Something. So We Did #-⚕⚕- ROSA -⚕⚕- But Who Would Want To Die As A Cowardly Little Child? When Our Time Is Up; Will We Be Ashamed Or Proud?#Xbloodiedxkneesx #-⚕⚕- JINX -⚕⚕- Eyes In The Dead Still Water. Tried But It Pushed Back Harder. Cauterized And Atrophied. This Is My Unbecoming…#-⚕⚕- JINX X ROSA -⚕⚕- This Is When It’s Now Or Never. When It Goes From Bad To Better. This Is When It All Makes Sense Somehow.#-⚕⚕- ZIMA -⚕⚕- No One Can Hear Me Scream. Maybe It's Just A Dream. Maybe It's Inside Of Me. I Must Confess I Feel Like A Monster…#-⚕⚕- ZIMA x GUMMY -⚕⚕- And If It Kills Me Tonight I Will Be Ready To Die. A Hero's Not Afraid To Give His Life. A Hero's Gonna Save Me…#-⚕⚕- GUMMY -⚕⚕- Will You Stay? Stay 'til The Darkness Leaves. I Know You're Busy. I Know I'm Just One. Are You There? Are You Watching Me?

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sleeperagentclone · 2 months

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I am too socially inept to deal with all the weird people my dad has collected over the years

#Like no my dad is not here right now because come back when he is #The old people who seem like they did too many drugs in the 70s/80s are more annoying #But like he'll set up a precedent of buying shit from homeless guys because “maybe they'll have something good someday”#And he'll just give them money which is all well and good (if I ever donate money to anything or give change to anyone I've been scammed)#But then he expects me (5'1 teenage girl looking ass) to refuse to give them money when he cuts them off #Like he is 65+ and over 6 feet tall I AM NOT #And like telling people who are seemingly unstable that you can't give them money and that no only the owner buys things and no you can't #Leave a pile of junk for him to look at later and no I can't give you any money over and over is fucking scary!#I am for sure speaking from a place of privilege because I would probably just be dead if not for my support network #I could very easily be on the other side of this I'm not fucking stable I can't hold down a real job #But I am just not equipped to be having these interactions and honestly I shouldn't be having them anyway #He keeps pretty regular hours and answers his phone so I don't understand why people are always looking for him when I'm here #I will say the homeless guys he buys from have gotten a lot better about coming in when he's actually here #And one of them Chris is perfectly nice he's a great artist but he also smells bad and is visiblely dirty sometimes and that sets off my ocd #and also makes me feel like a really shitty person for 'judging' him when I know that he doesn't have stable access to a shower #When I'm actually just suffering from my mental illness and that can also trigger the intrusive thought side of the ocd #Where I get stuck in a loop of thinking I'm a terrible person #And also I just feel bad not giving him money #And like we sell his art in the store but people rarely buy it which is annoying because it's pretty fucking sick

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reduxskullduggerry · 10 months

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i started playing 'tell me why', a video game that a tumblr post recommended for being free and having a trans protagonist, both of which were true. And small spoiler about the start of the game, it's about twins, and one is trans and killed his mother in self-defense when she attacked him physically for him cutting his hair. and then it flashes forward and the police officer who arrested him is now his sister's adoptive dad and the sister kind of wants him to forgive this guy and now im not sure where i want to keep playing this game bc its so ridiculous to me that you would ever expect someone to forgive that and i'm really not sure the narrative will reflect that by treating her perspective as ridiculous.

#tell me why #tw child abuse mention #? very brief mention but just in case #like im just very univested in the good cop making a difficult decision that they seem to be setting up #rule it a justifiable self-defense and go home #and dont adopt the sister of the kid you arrested??#hello???#tw transphobia mention #if other people have played it and have thoughts im very open to hearing them bc could be that im judging it too early

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intoxicated-chan · 11 months

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angsty fight between miguel and wife!reader

and then they make up yayayayay

Give Me Reasons We Should Be Complete

✿ฺ Paring ➳❥ Miguel O’Hara x F!Reader

✿ฺ Summary ➳❥ Miguel has been pushing you away for some time now. After a talk with a friend, you and Miguel try to sort things out.

✿ฺ (A/n) ➳❥ Inspired by “DANCING IN THE DARK” by Joji. Writing this made me think back on past crushes/lovers. But thank you for your request! I am also holding back on writing smut because it keeps getting labeled and it takes me longer to write.

✿ฺ Word Count ➳❥ 1.4k

✿ฺ Content Warnings ➳❥ Female reader, angst-to-fluff, swearing, Miguel is kinda a dick head, mentions of sleep deprivation…

Want more Miguel content? Check out my MASTERLIST!

You stood in his cold and dark office. The best source of light was his laptop but his huge frame blocked most of the light. You managed around the crumbled paper and thrown desk objects with a plate in hand.

“Miguel?” You peer over his shoulder, “I made you dinner.”

He nods.

“You know you haven’t eaten since yesterday.”

He nods again.

“And you know that you’ve been here for a long time. I think it’s best for you to-”

“Take a break?” Miguel interrupts you, “I don’t have time for that.”

“Miguel, I’m sure whatever it is, it can wait a few minutes. All I’m asking is for you to eat something.” You try to set the plate down.

“I thought I made it clear that I do not want to be bothered. You’re distracting me. Leave.”

He didn’t mean it like that… He didn’t mean it like that. He didn’t mean it like that. He didn’t mean it like that…

“But Mig-”

“I said go.” He growls, his eyes turning its blood red from anger, “You’re becoming a nuisance.”

He didn’t mean it like that.

“Okay.” You tried not to let the crack in your voice show. You didn’t even bother to leave the plate behind because you knew it was going to be wasted.

“And don’t bother me again.” You heard him say as you left his office.

You took deep breaths, trying to calm yourself down before you burst into tears. But your hands shook, nearly dropping the plate.

You choked down your sobs and let your tears fall, the plate was left in the fridge, and you pushed yourself to your bedroom. It was basically yours now since Miguel was sleeping in his office.

The sheets no longer lingered on his cologne and any sign of his presence was gone, other than his clothing and a few photos. The room has become a mess of discarded clothing, old plates and cups, and candy wrappers.

How long has it been since Miguel showed affection? Or even looked at you?

This was normal behavior for Miguel, right? You should know, you’re married to him. You’re his wife. But he experienced loss, unlike you. You didn’t want to judge him for how he deals with his emotions, he’s emotionally distant. You knew that from the start.

And because of this, you felt like he deserved more than what you could give him. It’s what kept you going through the many times Miguel tore your heart, how it squeezed in pain at his actions and words. How you look the other way and ignore his hurtful words.

You couldn’t sleep. You left the still cold bed and dressed in something warm and headed up to the roof.

You sat on the edge, looking at Nueva York. How beautiful it looked during the night, which is one of the reasons why you liked sitting up here.

“Sitting all by yourself?” You tense up only to relax when you know that voice, “At this time? All alone?” Peter B. lands next to you, his daughter in his arms.

“I would ask my husband to join me but he’s too busy.” You respond truthfully.

“Again? He’s been at this all week.” He sits next to you.

“Yeah.” You huff.

“And… how are you holding up?”

“I’m fine.”

“Really? Because it doesn’t look like it.” He offers Mayday who reaches out to you.

You take her and set her down on your lap, “I just don’t know what to do, everything I do seems to bother Miguel. Checking up on him, bringing him food. It feels like he’s doing this on purpose.”

“Miguel’s always been difficult and from the time I spent with him… He’s different, not like the rest of us. He’s accepted his fate as Spider-Man and believes he’s destined for bad things 24/7. But good things do come along, like you. I think… I think he’s trying to come to terms that he can get it because he deserves it.”

Mayday coos, pulling at your hair, “And I think Miguel is scared. He puts on his tough act because he has to, yet he’s afraid to admit he’s scared. Normally, people would’ve given up on him. Why haven’t you?

“Till death do us part. I don’t want to lose him. I don’t give up on him because when you love someone, you love them every single day as who they are.”

“Talk about romantic.”

“Oh please.” You look down at Mayday, “Plus I think-”

“There you are.” You jump and this time, you remain tense, “I was looking for you.”

“Now you’re looking for me?” You respond, refusing to turn your head.

“It’s late, (Y/n). It’s dangerous.”

“I’m here, she’s alright.” Mayday jumps into her father’s arms.

“I’ve already had enough of you. Please, (Y/n).”

“It’s fine.” You tell him, following Miguel inside.

You head to the bedroom, “Where are you going?”

“Bed.”

“(Y/n)-”

“I’m tired and I do not want to be bothered. That includes you too, Miguel.”

“Excuse me?” He follows you into the bedroom.

“You heard me.”

“Please, (Y/n), talk to me.” Miguel begs.

“I’m sorry, did you just say talk? Like I have been trying to do for the past week?”

“(Y/n)-”

“You know what? No, no. You do not get to try to get me to talk after all of this. I have been trying, I have been all in. All I asked of you was to look after yourself.”

“I know.”

“You know? You KNOW?” You scoff rather loudly, “Did you know that Lyla has even talked to me about your behavior? I’m worried about you Miguel. All the damn time, even more when I see you not eating and staying up all night. All I ask is one minute, one bite of the damn food.”

“I’m… I’m so sorry.”

“Is sorry all you have to say? Not even a half assed excuse?” You see Miguel trying to form a sentence but nothing leaves his left and his head hangs low, “I need to be alone.”

You walk past him but he grabs your arm, “Please don’t leave.” He says, “Please don’t walk out that door.”

“I’m sleeping on the couch, you could have the bed.” You look up at him.

“I love you, (Y/n). I know I don’t say it as much but I fucking love you. He’s right, you know. I am scared. Scared of everything. Because at first, I didn’t think I could have that, have you. You let me hurt you and that is unforgivable.”

He’s crying. Looking right at you, letting himself be bare right in front of you. His grip on your arm loosens and his hands come up to your face, cupping your cheeks. You could hear his staggered breathing, trying to keep himself composed.

“But I wasn’t lying when I said I love you, I wasn’t lying when I said I wanted a family, and I wasn’t lying when I said that you make me believe in love.”

“I’m always here for you, Miguel. You don’t have to go through things alone, but when you want to, I’m here.” You take one of his hands into yours, pulling it away from your face but keeping a tight hold on it.

“It’s not that easy. I hurt you, I understand why you don’t want to.”

“I love you, Miguel. We’ll work on this. I promise you.” After a moment, Miguel practically tackles you, nearly falling to the ground. The hug is tight and warm, and you could feel your shirt become wet with Miguel’s tears.

“You’re okay, right?” His voice cracks as he speaks through his sobs, “Please tell me you’re okay.”

“I promise you, I am okay.” You whisper.

“I’ll make it up to you, I swear.”

“You can start by getting some rest. But you’ve got a lot of apologies O’Hara.”

You don’t know how long you and Miguel stayed like this, nor did you care. All you cared about was Miguel and he felt complete at last.

#x reader #x female reader #fluff #angst #miguel o'hara x reader #miguel o’hara x reader #miguel o'hara #miguel o’hara #spider man x reader #spiderman 2099 x reader #spiderman x you #spiderman 2099 #spiderman x y/n #spider man across the spider verse #spider man 2099 #spiderverse #spider man x y/n #spider man x you #spiderman x reader

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