#maybe ill just go to sleep about it. turn my brain off.

[greenfiredragonfly]

My brain keeps shouting at me: "what are you even here for if you're not needed?" I'm so tired of this. Just shut uuuuuuuppp. T_T Stop telling me I'm unnecessary and unimportant and just in the way. God.

...how do I find a place where I feel wanted? Where I feel safe? Is it possible? Is it even possible? Please tell me that it's possible please please

#personal #mental health is a bitch #maybe ill just go to sleep about it. turn my brain off. #im so tired #id call my mom and beg her for reassurance like she does with me but im not her and i refuse to be #...eventually she's going to get used to me not living with her anymore....and then no one will need me. no one. #fuck #im so scared of ending up alone #it's so terrifying #im scared

[dmercer91]

can we get a part 2 of luke liking jacks best friend??? maybe where they end up together 🤭

got the girl, lh43

in which luke's behaviour finally clicks and you mess with him until he can admit his feelings out loud (2.0k)

soft, almost needy/naive luke is becoming my favourite cause i love me a boy that's deeply reliant on his snuggles despite being tall and man shaped. a little unproofread and a little silly in the middle, for flavour

when you woke up, you found yourself tucked under lukes arm, your face now a little hidden into his neck so that he could be far up enough on the bed that his legs didn't teeter the edge.

he was sound asleep, a little less of a morning person than you despite his hectic schedule during most of the year.

the summer was his time to sleep until ludicrous hours, and you took note throughout the years that he always took advantage.

he was always the last one of the brothers to hobble downstairs for breakfast, sleep frequently prominent in his eyes and his hair a tangled mess of his curls that were drying out due to the lake water and lack of caring for.

so you let him rest, carefully untangling yourself from his grasp and heading to wash your face, and brush your teeth. it would be a while before quinn was up, usually the most responsible brother who knew that if he got up early enough he could poach some of your breakfast and have a little while of peace in the gym or front yard.

you cleaned up some of the water bottles that had been left in the living room from the night prior, folding the throw blankets and fixing up the pillows before starting to cook your breakfast, deciding on a simple one for today; eggs, toast and some fruit.

what you didn't expect was to hear the creak of the stairs within a few seconds of you frying your eggs, your eyebrows furrowing as you examined the microwave for the time.

a little early for quinn, but you figured it was him anyways. "quinny?" you said, your voice travelling far enough to make it to the stairs but not to make its way upstairs and wake anyone.

when he didn't answer, you turned your head and saw that it was luke, rubbing exhaust from his eyes and sleepily making his way over to you.

you smiled, allowing him to wrap his arms around you and tug you into him, and sharp whine echoing into your ear as he saw that you were cooking breakfast.

"it's so early.. come back to bed w' me," he pleaded, tugging you away from the oven and pawing at the knobs of the stove, trying to turn it off.

you giggled, adjusting his arms on you and turning back to your pan, shaking your head.

"i'm making my breakfast, lukey. i can make you some, hm?" he shook his head, tucking his face into your neck as if the natural morning light was too harsh on his eyes.

his arms unravelled from your waist, hands planting on your hips and soothing up and down, pulling your shirt up on your waist a little with each passing.

you bit your lip, his actions from now and last night finally coming together in your brain.

snuggling up with you, staring at you instead of watching a movie he picked out, agreeing to spend the night with you, calling you baby by accident. you weren't sure how you hadn't picked up on it before.

everything was confirmed for you when the stairs croaked once again, now under the feet of the eldest hughes brother. when he saw you, luke still trying to pry your attention away from anything that wasn't him, his face lit with an amused smile.

he knew

you started to ponder on if jack knew, or even trevor and alex. if everyone was painfully aware of luke's eyes always being trained on you and decided to keep it from you.

you blinked back into reality, turning off the stove and plating your eggs. "lu?" you mumbled, offhandedly like you had a question you'd been meaning to ask him for some time, even though it only just come to you.

he hummed, hopeful eyes peeking up at you and his hands coming to a halt. "how about you go get ready and ill make you some breakfast, n' we can have it out on the boat," you murmured, cupping his head in your hand and playing with his curls.

you were gonna see how long it took until he broke, admitted how he'd been feeling.

you watched as his eyes dilated, scanning down to your lips with a deer in headlights-esque look of infatuation. he licked his lips, eyes darting back up to yours as soon as he caught his own staring.

he then nodded, blinking away the evident look of euphoria on his face at the feeling of your hands in his hair.

"oh," he murmured, still nodding along to your question. it was like he was under a spell. "okay," he finished, your hand retreating from his curls and pressing to his chest.

"i'll meet you out there, alright? gotta change once i'm done making your food," you instructed, earning one last nod of confirmation before he finally tore his body away from yours and lugged himself back upstairs and towards his own room.

"don't tell me you're gonna do this until he tells you himself," quinn's voice came from behind you once luke's bedroom door was shut and he couldn't hear the conversation.

"what's the fun in telling him i know? and plus, you can't tell me you didn't love watching that," you gestured to where luke had been standing, calling back to the blindingly obvious pining that the older brother had watched from the stairs.

he nodded a little, smile cracking at his lips as he took the plate of food you had already made for yourself.

you glared at him, mixing together another couple eggs into your bowl now that yours were gone.

"what! they would've been cold by the time you got to the boat anyways," he defended, shovelling a fork full of eggs into his mouth and sitting down at the island.

"y/n?" he asked, swallowing his bite.

you hummed, looking back at him as you poured the eggs into the pan. "you won't just lead him on, will you? like, you feel the same," he asked quietly, eyes avoiding yours after a quick second of eye contact.

your lips pulled back into a smile at his attempt at nonchalant protectiveness over his youngest brother, and you shook your head. "silly question. remember the girl who's face i shoved into a pile of snow? when we were kids?" you recalled, and quinn chuckled.

"yeah. i guess he's kinda always been yours," he stated, much more comfortable now that he knew two of his favourite people would soon stop dancing around each others requited feelings.

when the stairs could be heard again, you were expecting luke, but instead you saw your best friend, gloomy as he stared at you.

"you watched top gun without me, and you had our movie night with my little brother," he pouted, going up to you and ruffling your hair, tugging you into a side hug.

"even?" he asked, looking down at you hopefully.

"you threw me into the pool while i was wearing white. and zegras was there. even," you stuck your hand out, watching as he bashfully took it up to his lips and kissed your knuckles.

"not my brightest impulse decision, i have to admit," he sighed, reaching over your head for a plate and stealing the toast that had come out of the toaster, then some eggs.

you gave him the same glare you'd sent quinn, earning a similarly mischievous grin.

"why'd you make so much if s' not for me?" he wiggled his eyebrows, eyeing luke's bedroom door.

you rolled your eyes, a response you seemed to have needed to resort to one too many times this morning. for future reference, you'd keep in mind that one brother at a time for this hour of the morning was more than enough.

"her and lukey have a breakfast boat date," quinn teased, the two of them looking at each other with excited looks, both with hints of relief that something finally stirred between you and luke.

"at long last was getting a little long, munchkin. good for you," he kissed your forehead, sitting next to quinn at the counter.

"you're both just.. so insufferable" you grumbled, now having to finish off the carton of eggs you'd been using since two plate fulls had been stolen from you.

you popped more toast into the toaster, frowning at the empty plate of strawberries you’d cut up and grabbing the container of unsliced ones to make up some more.

switching focus back to the eggs, you scrambled them up and shook the pan around, ensuring a more even cook.

then, thing one and thing two came jogging downstairs in a full fledged conversation at the top of their lungs

“no, no. i totally kicked your a- ooh, fruit,“ he went to grab a piece of strawberry, earning a slap on the hand.

you spun around, spatula drawn like a sword at his face

“zegras, if you touch my food, this spatula is going down your throat.” his eyes went wide for a second, index finger pointing to your utensil and slowly lowering it down

“i liked you better yesterday,” he grinned, winking and grabbing an apple from the fridge, tossing one to alex. “touchy, this morning.” he grumbled under his breath as you glared at jack

“come on, man. you’re gonna get my top gun privileges revoked. again,” jack got up to put his plate away, shoving trevor’s shoulder on the way by.

“i like that that’s what you’re worried about, that’s really cool of you, j.” you rolled your eyes once more, finally greeting alex with a ruffle of his hair.

then finally, after the string of hockey boys coming down to steal your breakfast, each adorned with bottomless pits for stomachs- luke made his way back to the kitchen. he was now in a hoodie and swim shorts, his hair wet from his shower.

“could you finish up plating everything, lu? your brothers stole our original plates so i’m running a little behind,” you smiled sarcastically as the two eldest waved to you

luke chuckled, nodding and taking your place in front of the stove.

while you changed, he finished cutting up the fruit, he put whatever spreads you’d taken out on the toast, and he split the eggs.

when he was done, he turned to see his brothers, along with trevor, alex and cole- who came down as you went back up, staring at him.

he turned his shoulders inward, suddenly a little too self aware.

“.. what?” quinn grinned, cole coming to pat him on the back as he made his own meal.

“look who finally got the girl,” trevor teased, alex wiggling his eyebrows after taking a bite of his apple.

he furrowed his eyebrows, looking at jack who nodded in confirmation.

“i got the girl?” he asked softly, arms falling to his sides, slightly limp in his state of shock.

“yeah, you did.” you smiled from the entrance to the kitchen, coming up and massaging his shoulder a little.

“you are no fun,” you pointed at quinn, who raised his hands in defence.

“what? why?” luke asked, looking down at you with his head tilted adorably.

“i was gonna mess with you just a little longer. wanted you to admit it,” you grinned, hand on his abs

he smiled a little, pecking your lips.

you tugged at him, grabbing your plate and nodding to his.

“c’mon, now.” you pulled him towards to patio door.

the boys whistled after the two of you and you giggled, looking back to see jack with a proud, almost bashful smile. his favourite people, this’d mean a lot to him even if he never said it.

to save face, the last thing you heard from him on your way out of the back was ‘wear protection!’

you shook your head with a smile, turning to luke now that you couldn’t be seen.

“my lukey,” you murmured, cupping his face and kissing him softly, still more intense now that there wasn’t an audience.

he nodded into your kiss, returning the favour with a hint of desperation.

“my girl,”

#e’s fics #luke hughes #luke hughes x reader #hockey imagine #nhl imagine #new jersey devils #hughes brothers

[lovlive]

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ midnight insomnia' - c.yj

SYNOPSIS - its the middle of the night and you have 2 problems; no.1 you cant sleep, and no.2 you miss your boyfriend. PAIRING - choi yeonjun x f!reader GENRE - fluff, established relationship WARNINGS - reader is depicted with a pink colour, reader is called ‘baby’ and ‘girlfriend’, just yeonjun and y/n being really cute with eachother <3 requested from anon: hi! i dont think you've posted yet, maybe your busy or just dont know what to write about since your a new blog, but i want to put in a req.. could you do reader x yeonjun with the prompt “i can’t sleep, come to my bed” id actually die AAH im so curious what you could turn this into, thanks :}

notes: thanku sm for the req! yeah, i havent been writing yet since my brain was blank tbh i had no ideas for a fanfic in mind 😭😭 but now youve added fuel to my fire and ill try start writing more often :3 (and yes, the 127 in the fic was on purpose)

The moon cast a soft glow through the small sliver between your curtains, painting the room in hues of silver. In the quiet of the night, you tossed and turned under your soft blanket, unable to find solace in slumber. As you battled with your insomnia, you just couldnt keep your mind off of one thing; Yeonjun. You couldnt stop thinking about the way he would hold you through these chilly early-spring nights, and how much you missed his warm body next to yours. At this point you’ve realised just how starved you were from him despite only seeing him a couple of days ago.

You gave up on your slumber, rolling like a log from one side of your bed to another to pick up your phone. The sharp glow from the screen hit your eyes, your face instinctively scrunching up since you werent used to the brightness. Your fingers lazily glided over to the message app icon, and then tapped on Yeonjun’s contact. The time at the side of the screen caught your eye, and your realised it was 1:27 AM. You were a little weary of texting your boyfriend at this late hour; you knew that he was probably tired after a long day of practicing and you didnt want to seem selfish or too clingy. But you shook off your bad feelings since you knew that Yeonjun wasnt the type to be able to fall asleep easily either. You began to type your messages…

“jjunieeee..”

“baby… ☹️”

As expected, Yeonjun was of course awake. Your one word messages were opened by him a minute later. He looked at the texts, a little confused on why you’d be texting him right now. Any how, he started typing back.

“y/n? why’re you still up. you better not be up to some weird shi 😐”

“jjunie, i cant sleep. come to my bed.”

“baby, its half 1 in the morning.”

“please..😔 i really cant sleep and i need sum1 by my side 😞”

“y/n you’re going to be the death of me... but what wouldnt i do for my beautiful girlfriend”

“ill be there in 5”

“yippee! 😇 i love you ❤️”

“love you more baby ❤️”

Your face lit up as your boyfriend agreed to come over. You immediately put your phone back on your side table and plugged it back into charging, then quickly tossed the dirty socks that were lying on your bedroom floor underneath your bed to appear a little tidier. After a little while, you could hear a quiet knock echo through your small apartment; your face lighting up once again. Your feet quickly brought you to your hallway, where you rummaged your drawer for your keys. Eventually finding them, you jammed the correct key into the keyhole, twisiting it and gently opening the door. As your boyfriend appears from behind the door, you immediately pull him into a hug, shutting the door behind him. “Whats up with you today?” He teases as he feels your arms lock around him tightly, wrapping his arms around your waist in response. “Just missed you baby.” You responded, taking in his soft scent which you missed badly. “Y/n, we just saw eachother a few days ago..” His chuckle landed right in your ear, warm breath brushing right up against your ear. The sensation of course did not fail to make you blush a little. “Yeah, but ‘just a few days ago’ feels like an eternity to me.” You whisper into his shoulder, finding comfort in just burrying your face in his shoulder and hiding from the world. You feel his hands come away from your waist and up to your back, rubbing small circles. “You really arent a patient person, are you? Now, lets get you to bed.” He whispers as he takes your hand in his and begins to lead you over to your bedroom. You obviously dont resist, and grip his hand back as you walk behind him. None of you made a sound as you walked to your bedroom. Both of your social batteries were drained from the long day you’ve survived today, and all you wanted to do was to hold eachother in peace as you tried to fall back into a slumber.

You walk into your bedroom, and Yeonjun leads you straight to your bed. He lets you crawl in and under the covers as he takes off his jacket and throws it onto the chair you have by your desk. He came just wearing his pajamas, since he knew all you were going to do together was snuggle and sleep. He climbs onto your bed, arms wrapping tightly around your body as your face hides in his chest. His hand runs through your soft hair in a consoling manner, trying to get you to feel more tired and sleepy. His hands work like magic, your eyes beginning to feel heavier by the minute. But before you fall asleep, you give his hand a gentle squeeze and manage to whisper a set of three familiar words.

“I love you.”

#drabble #kpop imagines #one shot #x reader #kpop #yeonjun #yeonjun imagines #yeonjun drabbles #txt #txt imagines #txt fanfic #yeonjun fanfic #yeonjun x reader #yeonjun x y/n #yeonjun x you #yeonjun oneshot #oneshot #txt oneshots #new kpop blog #fanfic

[riordanness]

— say don’t go - [tmr!newt]

wordcount: 0.9K

warnings: uh- you have the flare

requested: no

We’d been running for… how long? It felt like forever. Days and days of scorching heat, oppressive sunlight, harsh winds. My throat feels dry all the time, my eyes ache, and my legs are rubber.

At least I have Newt. No one could ask for a better friend. He’s always there for me, right beside me no matter what. He gives me the water even though I know he must be just as thirsty as I am.

He makes sure he’s the one carrying the pack we’re supposed to be sharing; he’s always taking my turns.

How can I tell him I know I’m not immune? That the cranks scratched me back in that old warehouse a few days ago? The weight of knowing my days are dissolving in front of my eyes is so heavy I can barely breathe. What should I do? What does anyone do, knowing you’re about to die?

I know I have to tell him soon. I can’t keep putting it off — it’s killing me in more ways than one.

Minho calls for a stop hours after nightfall. I have lost complete track of time; too lazy to keep track with my wristwatch. My head is fuzzy enough as it is.

Newt glances at me, and gives me a weak smile. I try to return it, but I can’t. I collapse to the ground, my knees giving way after one too many hours of walking.

Newt is at my side in an instant. “Are you alright?”

I try to nod my head. “Just… tired. Sorry.”

“It’s okay.” He holds out our shared water bottle. There’s barely a gulp left in the bottom.

I shake my head. “You take it. I had it last.”

“No.” Newt is serious. “You need it more than I do. Besides…” He hesitates, but doesn’t continue. I’m too scared to ask what he means.

I eventually give it and take the water, the few semi-cold drops helping immensely. I feel my body shutting down, my eyes trying to close.

Newt shifts over to sit beside me. “Go to sleep, love.”

I don’t even try to stay awake. I lean against him and am instantly in darkness.

The next thing I know, I’m startled awake. I don’t know why, as it’s still pretty dark, the air is still cool, and none of the boys have stirred. I wonder briefly if a sound in the night woke me, but I see and hear nothing.

It’s probably just the growing anxiety and disease taking over my brain. I inch away from Newt, desperate not to wake him. He’s been doing so much for me, for everyone. I owe him my life ten times over, and I don’t want to disturb maybe the last peaceful sleep he may get.

I get to my feet, and my eyes stray to Newt’s sleeping face. I have a ridiculous urge to touch his cheek. He looks so soft and pretty and perfect, just laying there.

I force myself to turn around. I walk a minute, until I stumble across a little boulder and sit down, my chin in my hands. This illness inside of me is eating me up. I can feel myself fading away, everything that makes me me slowly dissolve into nothing.

I don’t know how long I sit there, despairing.

Eventually, someone approaches. I can tell by the slightly uneven footsteps who it is even before they speak.

“Hey, Newt.” I have no emotion in my voice, struggling to keep it even.

“Y/n,” he replies, gently sitting beside me. “What’s up, love?”

I shrug. “Nothin’.”

Even though it’s too dark to tell properly, I know he’s got his you-are-such-a-bad-liar face on. “Y/n.”

I sigh. “Okay. Fine. I—“ But the words die in my throat. I can’t seem to find the right way to tell the boy I love more than anything that I’m about to, well, die.

“You have the bloody Flare.” The anger in Newt’s voice takes me by surprise more than the fact that he knows.

“What—“

He slams his hand into the rock we’re sitting on, cutting me off. “It’s not fair!” He hisses. “We have to fix this, we have to—I cant, lose you—“

His voice cracks, and I hear him inhale sharply, like he’s trying not to cry.

That makes me break down. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you,” I sob. “I just—I didn’t want… I don’t know. I just don’t want this.”

“Nobody shuckin’ wants the Flare, Y/n.” Newt’s voice is gruff, but almost teasing, a little reminder of what we used to be together. Joking, teasing best friends.

That makes me break down completely, and I cry heartbrokenly into my hands. I feel Newt wrap his arms around me, pulling me into his chest. I cry into him, clinging to his shirt like it’s my life.

“Newt,” I manage. “I’m going to die.”

“No you’re not.” His tone is firm. “I’m not gonna lose you. I—I love you, ya dumb shank.”

“What…?” My tears come to a hiccuping stop, and I lift my head to look at him. “You…”

He lets out an embarrassed chuckle. “Yeah. Sorry. Bad timing?”

I shake my head, a smile on my face despite it all. “I love you too, idiot.”

“Oh,” Newt laughs. “Oh, okay. Good.”

I lean towards him, pressing a kiss to his mouth. “Just hold me, please? Help me forget for a while.”

And Newt does exactly that.

#newt #newt x reader #tmr #maze runner #the maze runner #maze runner fanfiction #newt x reader fanfic #tmr fanfic #thomas brodie sangster #tmr newt #newt maze runner

[the-way-of-words]

PolyVerse Cam Boy AU//Jolly

Joakim "Jolly" Karlsson x Holly(ofc) with mentions of Noah Sebastian x Holly(ofc), Nicholas Ruffilo x Holly(ofc), and Nicholas Ruffilo x Holly(ofc) x Noah Sebastian

Content warnings: partner sharing, exhibitionism, oral (male and female receiving), mentions of fisting, P in V sex, squirting, light choking, mentions of sex work

Contains sexual situations with fictionalized versions of real people. None of this is real, and we should all know this by now, but if it's still not your thing, hit the back button.

For the lovely @throwingmetothelions who has let me play in her Cam Boy HC sandbox not once, but twice now, since Jolly decided he wanted to have a turn. And thank you to @signs-of-ill-portent for being the best fucking cheerleader and beta ever to grace my life.

<This is a sex worker positive blog and if you have a problem with that then this is not the fic for you. Thnx.>

tag team: @cncohshit, @jxstthisonce, @kingdomof-omens, @ladyveronikawrites, @deathblacksmoke

if you would like to be added to a taglist, feel free to comment or send me an ask <3

~~~~~

Jolly doesn't exactly know what the whole situation is with Nick, Noah, and Holly. At the very least, he knows she's fucking both of them. Or maybe they're both fucking her. Although, judging by what he heard last night, he's pretty sure they're all fucking each other. 

Not that it matters all that much, but it's important he has some kinda story straight in his head when he enters the kitchen almost every morning to the sight of her dressed in someone else's shirt and little to nothing else. 

He feels like he's going insane, but who can blame him when he's had to go to sleep almost every night this week, hearing how pretty she sounds when one of them takes her apart? He tries not to listen – he does – but at this point, it almost seems like they're doing it on purpose. 

Add to that the fact that he watched every second of that stream they did a couple of months ago, and he's been a very distracted man indeed. It doesn't matter that they cut it off before any actual fucking took place, because he now knows exactly what she looks like writhing with a head between her legs, and it's beautiful. Jolly's dreamt about it; getting on his knees in front of her, throwing a leg over his shoulder while he eats her out, exactly how Nick said she likes it, only to wake either hard as a rock or sticky in a mess of his own making.

It's fine, he tells himself. He just has to stick it out for a few more days until Nick and Holly return to Virginia. He tells himself that he can handle it. It’s just a few more days, a few more sleepless nights, but it doesn't help. Jolly spends all of his next stream barely speaking, as the fantasy of Holly walking in on him takes hold and cums so hard, he's pretty sure he hears his jaw crack.

~~

"So, this is where the magic happens, huh?" 

He jumps at the sound of her voice, mouth going dry when he turns away from his computer to eye Holly leaning in the doorway because she's dressed in a shirt she must have taken from Noah’s laundry because it's actually his; he swallows, trying to will away the hardness forming in his sweatpants. The garment swims on her frame, and he hopes to God she’s got something on under it. 

"You know," she says conversationally as she kicks away from the door, "I thought about walking in on you while you were doing your stream thing yesterday." His eyes track her as she crosses into the room, cataloging the curves he can’t see, but knows are there. She perches herself on the desk in front of him, staring down at him with interest. "That's your thing, right? You like to be walked in on…watched?" 

He thinks it’d almost be funny if her words weren’t actively trying to break his brain. 

His fingers drum against his thigh, and he sighs. This is a bad idea, a voice in his head murmurs, and yet he answers anyway. “Uh…yeah.” He snorts. “Yeah, it is.” 

Holly nods, humming quietly to herself as her crossed ankles swing softly in the small space that separates them. His mind wanders back to what she said earlier, and he’s curious. 

This is a bad idea, the voice says again, but the question tumbles out of his mouth before he can think to stop it. “And what would you have done?”

“Hm?” Her eyebrow quirks, as if she’s confused, but he knows better. Jolly can see the little spark of mischief in her eyes. The one that reminds him so very much of Noah, and he understands now what Nick meant when he said those two were like two peas in a pod.

“What would you have done? If you had walked in?” He shouldn’t encourage this. Not when Nick and Noah are just on the other side of the wall. But he is so desperate to take back control of the situation, and, maybe if he goes far enough, he’ll be able to. Maybe if he tries hard enough, he’ll scare her off and she’ll go running back to them and stop rattling his cage like this. Jolly tilts his head as he stares at her for a beat longer, fingers pyramided in front of his chest.

She doesn’t move when he suddenly rolls his chair closer, smirking as he settles his hands on her knees. 

“Would you have opened up these pretty legs for me?” He moves his hands up her thighs until his fingers can slide under the hem of her shorts. “Would you have let me bury my face in this sweet pussy of yours until one of them came looking for you?” 

Glee rolls up his spine when Holly’s breath hitches as his fingers crawl higher under her shorts, and he pauses, hands halting until their eyes meet. He raises an eyebrow, wondering if this is all it will take, if now is when she’ll say stop and leave. But she doesn’t. Instead, she meets his gaze head-on, as if daring him to keep going. So he does, his calloused fingers searching until they reach the edge of her underwear. She leans back, spreading her legs wide as he slips beneath the elastic, shock replacing the satisfaction when he finds her folds slick.  

“Is that what you would have wanted, Jolly?” she asks, voice low, almost a breathless purr. “Is that what you thought about when you got yourself off last?”

He was, but it’s not as if he’d tell her that. Not when he’s slowly losing this dubious game of sexual chicken they’ve found themselves in. Jolly clears his throat, trying to focus on his goal instead of how warm she feels underneath his hands, how soft, how she smells like soap and hot water and some kind of strawberry lotion that makes his mouth water. But then she shifts her hips, causing his thumb to brush against her clit, and before Jolly can make sense of what he’s doing, he dips it down and into her wet slit. 

“Something tells me I’m not the only one that’s thought about it,” he counters. “Tell me, Holly, how many times have you thought about me when one of them has been between your thighs, huh?” 

He feels very, very warm all of a sudden, the heat pooling in his gut spreading out to the rest of him, and while he knows he should stop, should take his hands off her and tell her to get out, he can’t. He’s too mesmerized by the feel of her inner walls clutching at his thumb as he slides it in and out of her. 

It’s her whimper, a breathless call of his name, that snaps him out of the haze, that finally pulls his hands off of her as he stands abruptly, and maybe if he had any ability to actually think this through, this would be the end of it. But he’s too far gone now. Can’t do anything but take hold of her face with both his hands and plant his mouth on hers. 

The kiss is messy and desperate, wet, open mouths and tongues and he can’t figure out which one of them has wanted this more. Is it her, with her hands fisted in his t-shirt, trying to tug him closer? Or is it him, with the way he pulls away from her lips to lap up the taste of her from the sticky trail his thumb left on her cheek? He lets go of her face to suck his thumb into his mouth, and as her sweet musk settles on his tongue, he knows he has to have her.

There are no thoughts of the consequences they may encounter as he shoves his hands into the waistband of Holly’s shorts. He follows them down, planting his knees on the carpet, eyes zeroing in on the small patch of fabric a little darker than the rest. 

“Can I?” It’s an out as much as a request, their last chance to stop this before they go too far, and he hopes she takes it. Because he knows once he fully lets himself give in, there will be no going back. But she tangles a hand through his hair instead, nodding to him while she utters a quiet yes. It's all he needs to throw one of her legs over his shoulder and pull her underwear to the side as he licks into her. 

She invades his senses, the smell and taste of her all he knows, all he wants, and he wastes no time putting his stolen knowledge to use; rolling his tongue across her clit lightly before he tucks two fingers back into her. 

“Oh fuck,” he hears her rasp, fingers tightening in his hair. “Someone’s… someone’s been sneaky--” 

Her teasing reproach cuts off with a quiet moan when he crooks his fingers, another following quickly after as a third joins them. He pulls away for a moment, his cock twitching at the sight, and Jolly wonders exactly how many of his fingers she’d let him fit inside her… if she would let him work up to getting his whole fist inside, just to see how she would look stretched around his wrist. 

He doesn’t realize he’s voiced his fantasy until he hears a sharp intake of breath. “You’re kinda a kinky fucker, aren’t you?” 

His eyes slide up to glance at her face, and fuck, isn’t she a pretty sight? Her face flushed, mouth fallen open in pleasure as she watches him fuck her with his fingers.

“Are you saying you wouldn’t let me?” he asks, twisting his head to take a nip of her thigh, “Wouldn’t let me call your boys in here and let them watch me open you up--”

For a split second, he thinks he hears a creak of the floor just outside his bedroom. But then she uses her grip on his hair to guide him back to her cunt and Jolly forgets all about it as he sneaks his tongue down to lick around his fingers, taking pride in the choked gasp of his name right before he sucks her clit into his mouth.

Holly lights up under his touch, pulling him even closer with shaking thighs as she cums. Her release gathers around his knuckles, and he drinks it up; licking and sucking until she’s pulling him away, tugging at him until he rises from his knees…only to plant her hands on his chest and send him stumbling back onto the bed. 

“Take your pants off.” 

He doesn’t need to be told twice, shuffling his sweatpants down his legs and tossing them to the floor while she pulls a condom from god knows where. 

The full weight of the situation, the actual wrongness of what they're doing, doesn't hit him until she kneels between his legs. It only adds fuel to the fire, sparking the heat inside his veins in a way that makes him ache. The floor creaks again; he’s sure of it this time, yet when he turns his head, there’s no one there. But that doesn’t stop his thoughts from running as she takes him into her mouth. 

The wet heat makes his eyes roll back, her tongue pulling bitten-off curses from his mouth as she swirls it around his cock head, and he wonders briefly who it is, standing with their ear to the door, hand on the doorknob, ready to walk in…he groans, squeezing his eyes closed. Or maybe it’s both Nick and Noah, taking turns to creep into the doorway and watch their girl with someone else, and he’s struck with the idea that maybe this has been the plan all along. 

But then Holly’s pulling off and rolling the condom down his length, straddling his lap, causing all coherent thought to cease as he slips inside her. She takes him in slowly, lips parting in a quiet sigh as she lowers herself at a snail’s pace, thighs flexing beneath his hands when she rises, only to sink lower with every pass until she’s fully seated. 

Holly pauses, her eyes fluttering closed as she rocks back and forth minutely. It makes his hips kick up on their own accord because even through the latex he can feel how wet she is, the tight clutch of her cunt pulling him under her spell even further. It’s almost as if he’s adrift, and the weight of her on top of him, the feel of her softness against him is the only thing keeping this from being a dream. 

She gasps, a noise caught somewhere between a laugh and a moan, as she steadies herself on his chest, “Easy, tiger. I need a minute.” 

“I'll try to behave,” Jolly snickers, deciding to let his hands roam as she continues to grind against him.

He grips her thighs, enjoying the way her flesh gives under his fingers when he thumbs at the flowers inked into her skin just below the crease of her hips. His hands trail under her borrowed shirt to caress the skin of her waist and she shivers, goosebumps forming in their wake as his hands slide up her torso to her ribcage, going further still until his thumbs reach the curve of her breasts. The full flesh fills his palms perfectly, and what he wouldn’t give to have her fully naked, to see all of her as she undulates on top of him. But he still doesn’t quite know where the line is, so he settles for teasing the sensitive buds of her nipples, pinching and rolling them until they stiffen. 

He hears the telltale noise of movement outside the door once more just as she begins to rock her hips back and forth, working up to a slow, steady rhythm that has arousal pooling at the base of his spine already; he cuts his gaze to the doorway, where he’s met with Nicholas’s heated stare. But before the panic can fully take root, the other man smirks, nodding in their direction as if telling him to keep going…and that’s when all the pieces start to fall into place.  

There's a reason they haven’t come looking for her. This has been a game all along, and that gives him an idea. 

“Do you think any of your boys are watching, sweet girl? Hmm?” Jolly asks. His hands slip from her chest to her waist, clutching her tightly as her hips twist devilishly.

She smirks, lowering down to her elbows, her breath hot against his ear when she whispers “What makes you think they haven’t been watching since the beginning?” 

He should probably be upset at the idea of being played like this. But instead, all it does is make him want this more, and if they want a show… who’s Jolly to deny them? He holds her steady, thrusting up into her roughly one last time before lifting her off him. 

Confusion colors her face. “Jol--”

“Turn around,” he interrupts and she follows his direction immediately, settling on her hands and knees as she faces the door. 

He’s quick to fit himself against her, eager to find his way back inside her tight heat. One of his hands slips under his t-shirt, caressing the ridges of her spine on its way to rest between her shoulder blades. It only takes the littlest amount of pressure for Holly to get the hint, and she lowers her chest to the bed, arms stretched out in front of her. 

He groans when he pushes inside, the tight clutch of her cunt trying to pull him deeper as she parts for him. He wants to take it slow, savor it, but when he spies Nick outside the door again his hips snap forward sharply, and he buries himself as deep as he can go. It’s almost as if he’s on autopilot, his body chasing the pleasure he knows hers will provide. His hips pull back before rolling forward, setting a satisfying rhythm as he drapes himself over her back.

She was right earlier. He is a kinky fucker, and a kinda nasty one at that, which means he is not above slithering a hand underneath her to cup her throat, using that hold to pull her face up from where it’s buried in his duvet to meet her boyfriend’s gaze. 

He can tell the exact moment the two lock eyes: a sharp gasp falls from her mouth as she throws herself back to meet his thrusts as best as she can. The wet, slick sound of her pussy hurtles him closer to the edge, and fuck, he wishes he could see her face as the pair stare at each other, but watching Nick watch her is a good consolation prize and he takes it willingly. 

He can see the sheer want in his friend's face, his jaw slack as he stares unabashedly, taking in every bit of what's happening in front of him, his inked hands press against his groin, tongue poking out to wet his lips before he swallows. Nick's hands fall to his sides, clenching into fists, and Jolly's curious.

“What about after this, huh?” he pants into the shell of her ear, tightening his grip on her neck until he can feel the flutter of her pulse, “Are you going to crawl back into bed with your boyfriends and let one of them inside you?” 

“Fuck,” Holly curses when he relaxes his hold, “o--only if you don’t make me cum again.” 

Jolly smirks when her inner walls start to quiver around him, even if it makes it harder for him to hold on, and he waits until Nick’s attention is on him before he replies.

“Well, I’d hate,” he gasps, “to send you back to them unsatisfied… shit, Holly--c’mon, touch yourself for me.”

He buries his face in her hair, unable to look at Nicholas any longer once she starts to play with herself, but he can still feel the burning weight of his friend's gaze as he chases his own end. It prickles at his insides, driving him closer and closer until Holly seizes up. Delight joins the ecstasy coursing through him when her release bursts forth, wetting the both of them before it drips onto the bed beneath. 

Light explodes behind his eyes as he digs his teeth into her shoulder, smothering his groan into the freckled skin as he lets go. His hips stutter and jerk as he gives her all he has, rutting into her until he’s spent. He feels fuzzy, a pleasant hum spreading through his bones when he lets himself slump onto the bed. Holly follows, coming to rest on her side, throwing a leg over his and he’s just about to tug her close and pull her into a kiss when Nick appears at the side of his bed. 

Jolly rolls to his back and focuses his eyes on the ceiling as if to give them some sort of privacy, trying to not give in to the awkward feeling settling in his stomach now that it's over. 

“I didn't know you could do that.” To his surprise, there’s not a trace of jealousy in Nick’s voice when he breaks the silence, it almost sounds like awe, if Jolly were to put a name to it. 

“I, uh, did not know that either.” Holly laughs and pride swells in Jolly’s chest.

“Well, Noah's going to be sad he missed it…He had to take a call from Matt just as you were getting started. Something tour-related, I guess, couldn't wait,” Nick says, preoccupied. Jolly sneaks a glance out of the corner of his eye, watching the man’s hand travel up Holly’s thigh to her center. Her legs part without him having to ask, yet she still makes a surprised noise when his fingers delve into her center, “He got you all messy, didn’t he?” 

It makes him feel a certain kind of way, being talked about like he’s not there. “I’m right here, you know.” 

Nick snorts. “You gonna participate in the conversation then, or just stare at the ceiling pretending to not be here?” 

Holly’s hand is warm when it settles on his cheek, pulling his attention from the light fixtures to the two of them instead. They both smile and Jolly finds himself smiling back. 

“So… this isn’t going to be weird then? We’re okay?” he asks.

Holly and Nick trade a glance before the man huffs another laugh. “Wouldn’t have done this if we thought it was going to be weird…” Nick studies his face, “But are you okay with it?”

“Fuck, are you kidding me?” he laughs, “I don’t think I’ve ever cum that hard before.” He means it, and if things aren’t weird for them, then he can’t say that things are weird for him either… especially if it means this is going to happen again.

~~

The next time he streams and Holly’s in town, he makes sure everyone can see how Noah watches before he walks in on them and Jolly doesn’t think he’s ever made that much money for a single session.

 And even though he doesn’t quite understand exactly what the four of them are doing, he’s gonna enjoy it while it lasts.

#bad omens fic #bad omens fanfiction #bad omens fanfic #rpf #bad omens rpf #joakim karlsson/ofc #jolly karlsson x ofc #nicholas ruffilo x ofc #nick ruffilo/ofc #joakim jolly karlsson fic #jolly karlsson fic #jolly karlsson fanfic #joakim karlsson fic #joakim karlsson fanfic #joakim karlsson fanfiction #jolly karlsson fanfiction #jolly karlsson smut #joakim jolly karlsson smut #joakim karlsson smut #smut fic #fic: polyverse au

[tripthelightfandomtastic]

not exactly wild for this wednesday; but i love how jake always looks sleepy.

imagine him coming home later than usual from the studio, especially grumpy considering he also didn’t get much sleep last night (oh so dreaded night owl tendencies, and a constantly musical brain). he sighs and takes off his shoes and coat the second he comes through the door, the air smelling of his favorite warm meal of yours. and when you meet him at the kitchen door with a small smile and open arms, he practically melts on you, humming and hiding his face into your neck.

“long day, sweet boy?” you’d mutter, and he’d sigh (both tired, and absolutely smitten for you)

“would you visit me in jail if i committed just a little bit of manslaughter?” he mumbles, but can’t help the small smile that grows on his face at your giggle

“maybe, i think you’d look hot with some jail tattoos” you run a hand through his hair to push it off his face, while the other one holds his cheek sweetly. jake closes his eyes with an almost purr. “will some casserole and a glass of wine keep your murderous tendencies at bay?”

he smiles, and nods with a yawn. you run your thumbs lightly over the dark bags under his eyes and kiss the tip of his nose. “take a seat, our glasses are already poured. ill fix our plates”

you set his plate in front of him, with warm bread next to it “hopefully its good enough to at least save danny from you. you know i love my daniel” he chuckles into his glass and squeezes your bum lovingly

“you know damn well danny wasn’t the problem” he grumbles. “i’ll become the problem if i have to listen sam and josh bitch at each other over a 5 word sentence again”

you smile into your glass and squeeze his arm, tracing the scar on it lovingly. “im sorry that it wasn’t a productive day, love”

it was fine, really. jake knew that he was just too tired, he probably would’ve bitched about a sentence too if he had the energy.

a warm full belly and a fuzzy wine feeling are enough to make jake’s eyes drop apparently, as he startled awake at the movement of your chair and the clanking of plates. he streches and shakes his head “no, no, let me” a yawn interrupts him “you made dinner, ill do the dishes”

you chuckle, and settle the plates in the sink. “id like you to not fall asleep on the sink and drown, thank you very much” you kiss his cheek, and smile at the soft blush that his face always betrays him with when you baby him, and pull on his arm “you and i are going to bed, after brushing our teeth and doing our skincare, of course. unfortunately we don’t stay this youthful and pretty on wine and casserole”

jake could have a hundred bad days, but in one night, you could wash them all away.

WHEN IS IT MY TURN!??!

#this was so sweet i love sleepy jake #wild wednesday #gvf #greta van fleet #josh kiszka #jake kiszka #danny wagner #sam kiszka #jake gvf #josh gvf #danny gvf #sam gvf

[paeries]

Sick of You — h.s.

[when a boyfriend of two years breaks it off and offers a new arrangement, of course you’ll take it up. this is your prime chance to prove him wrong. and Harry can’t bear to watch it]

word count; 9k

pairing; harry x reader

cw; friends to lovers au, smut, angst, im just saying my heart hurts for him

pov; y/n, but third person

[part two is here, part three is here, thank you for all the patience. im really excited for you guys xx]

She laid in her bed, blankets completely surrounding her as she tried to pay attention to the movie she had put on. She had everything she needed to enjoy her time by herself, really she did. But she felt like someone was stepping on her chest. Her heart felt like it had just been emptied out into the insides of her body. Just empty, throbbing, screaming. She was sure she’d gone through about three movies now, frantically searching for something, anything else to think about. She pulled her blanket up a bit further and glanced at her phone again. 1:24am. Had I really been staring at the wall for an hour and a half straight?

     She groaned and sunk deeper into the bed, pulling the pillow around her. I don’t even know what I was waiting for? Her alarm? The sun? Her eyelids starting to shut on their own? A text, you idiot. Remember? You’re hoping his date went shitty and she got too drunk and puked all over him. You were expecting him to be disappointed, send a message and ask for you to make up for it if he came over.  She grumbled, feeling whatever was going on in her chest expand and she felt her eyes prick with wetness. Y/N tried to shake her head, bury her fists into her eye sockets and beg the tears to go away. Tried to tell her brain, I’m fine, I’ll be just fine in the morning. I just needed some sleep. ”I need more wine.” She grumbled to herself, grabbing the bottle and tipping it upside down to swallow every drop of the last gulp. 

 

               At least you’re good for something. 

  

      That was what did it. That’s what sent her springing up off the bed and running to the bathroom to lurch over the toilet and empty her guts out. Over and over, till her body was too weak to hurl enough of anything, really, up and out of there. 

     He’s having a great time. He won’t need you much longer. It’s been over and you’re still a love sick puppy, fawning over his every move and hoping he miraculously realises that he made a mistake. That he didn’t mean any of what he said. 

     Y/N hung her head, defeated. Laying her forehead against the rim of the toilet, she sniffled and shook her head. “I should’ve pressed harder. I should’ve fought him a bit more.”

    You should’ve erased his number and ignored that text. You knew he didn’t want you anymore, just the pleasure you brought him. 

     She let out a cry, finally. Beating her fists off the porcelain tiles, she shouted as she cried. Letting her body crumple on the floor, she curled up, clutching her chest as she did, and cried and cried. 

She woke up the next morning, her head pounding, freezing from the coolness of the tiles. Had I really fallen asleep on the floor? She pulled herself up, took a pitiful look at her horrific appearance and shuddered.  She looked wrecked.

She pinched her brows together with one hand and reached over to turn the shower on, convincing herself that if she can at least manage to look better than she felt, maybe she could shake this nagging, nasty, haunting feeling. 

    About midway through her shower, she could hear someone moving about her apartment. Quickly finishing up but careful to leave the water on, just in case it was a burglar, or a murderer. She peered around the corner and felt as if last night was a dream. Because there he was, bopping around at 8 in the morning with coffees and a brown paper bag, as if he owned the place. “Excuse me?” She huffed out, blinking at him in disbelief. 

      Wonder what he’d think if he knew you’d spent the night on the bathroom floor ill, think he’d be so nonchalant? 

      She shook her head and stepped back to turn the shower off, wrapping a towel around her body before ducking into the room to dress herself. “You’re excused.” He mumbled to himself, snickering as he did so. As if he was so funny. “I brought some breakfast. You don’t take care of yourself.” He nodded to the state of her apartment, setting the to-go cups down on the kitchen table and tossed the paper bag next to them. “So, get dressed. Or don’t. Might save me the time.” He smirked. What the fuck does he know, ‘You don’t take care of yourself.’ What would he know about any of it? 

At least you’re good for something. 

     Her stomach lurched, and she managed to swallow whatever urge to run back to the bathroom and hide. She walked out of the room, pulling a t-shirt on and a pair of mens briefs with socks, wrapping her hair in a towelled turban to meet him in the kitchen. “What are you doing here?” Y/N snipped, taking the coffee and finding her seat. “Were you not listening?” He asked, leaning with his back  against the doorway. She stayed quiet, trying her best not to make his gaze before daring to open her mouth again, “How’d your date go?” She managed out before taking a good sip. 

     Mark’s eyes narrowed a bit, suspiciously at her. Because how did she know?  “It was great. She was fun.” He muttered, crossing his arms over his chest. “Did you really car-“ “Not really.” She interjected, “Just small talk. Since you didn’t answer my original question.” He sighed, swallowing before clearing his throat and straightening up. ''Well, if you want the truth-” He started and then paused, almost as if he was begging her to not let him finish. “She stayed the night..” He tested, watching her closely. She could feel his eyes burning holes into her shoulder blades. “And I thought I’d pop out and grab us something quick to eat while she slept but-” She coughed hoarsely and turned to look at him over her shoulder. “She was gone when you got back.” She finished, pulling the towel out of her hair and setting it on the back of a chair.

     Good. That’s what you get. 

    “Her coffee is good.” She admitted while shaking her head feeling nothing but pity for herself as she stood up to find a hairbrush. “I actually don’t know her order, I ordered what I thought you would.” He admitted, stepping across to open the paper bag to reveal two muffins as she made her way back to the kitchen while brushing her wet hair. “There’s a blueberry cobbler style and a blackberry cheesecake style. Thought it’s interesting enough to try.” He had been hoping that would take off the heat from the embarrassment of his good gesture to a one night stand. To someone else. “I’ve never heard of any muffin cheesecake.” She muttered, hesitantly reaching over to grab the blackberry speckled looking muffin. 

     Why am I eating a breakfast so hopefully meant for someone else who must have blown his mind when I can tell him to leave?

     “D’you get drunk last night?” Mark asked, pulling her from her thoughts and sending her into a frantic search for an explanation of the four wine bottles that laid on the floor. “Had some girlfriends over, s’all.” She said quickly, picking at the muffin in front of her. “Four bottles of wine?” He retorted, tutting a little bit. “Surprised they aren’t still strewn all over the floor. S’8:41 in the morning..” He added, seemingly having no clue it was all her. And granted it wasn’t four full bottles… It was two full ones and two half drank. “Yeah, well, they stopped drinking before I did- Don’t you have somewhere better to be?” She added in quickly, grabbing the coffee and looked directly at him. Her jaw clenched tightly as she watched his body uncomfortably shift where he stood. “Guess I could find something..” He said after a decently long pause, “Y’welcome, by the way-“ He chuckled, stepping out the door before she could shout back, “Hey,  fuck you!”  The door shutting right afterwards. She whimpered slightly, gritting her teeth together as she stared at the picked apart muffins that he left. For someone else. She threw the coffee into the sink and turned around, making a beeline for her phone and typing out, 

     “Come over.” Sent, Delivered. Read 8:49am

  Within twenty minutes or so, the front door was flung open and with four long strides, she had been tossed over his shoulder and carried into the bedroom.

Y/N had just enough time to change her briefs into a sweeter cotton thong with a strawberry embroidered at the top in front.  “Wait! Wait!” She laughed out, “You have to shut the front door!” She shrieked, her body now tossed to the bed, bouncing as she landed.

Watching him jog back to shut the door, she thought about the differences between the two men. Harry didn’t make the room feel as though the oxygen was being sucked up, like Mark did. She couldn’t breathe when he was around lately. Harry was more comfortable, and she'd be lying if she were to say she didn’t find herself wishing to have never met Mark to avoid this whole mess. She really wished it was Harry that gave her difficulty to breathe.

“Tha’ any better?” He asked, hands waiting at the door handle of her bedroom for her confirmation. “Much.” She laughed, rolling her eyes and sat up straight in her bed waiting to receive him again. 

He shut the door and came over to the bed, bringing his hand up to tuck a stray hair up and behind the curve of her ear. “Tickles.” She mumbled, hooking her fingers into the loops of his jeans. “Y’gonna help me or what?” Y/N huffed, tilting her head to the side as she challenged him. He raised a brow and lifted his hand to place at her chest to push her back against the bed. “Yeh, I’ll help y’” He mumbled, pushing her shirt up her ribcage, peppering kisses here and there.

She stared up at the ceiling while bringing her hand to the back of his head, aimlessly swiping her thumb across the short hair that laid at the nape of his neck. She couldn’t stop thinking about Mark and Harry, Harry and Mark… Harry… “Harry…” She mumbled, squirming in her place on the bed. Harry groaned, digging his hips into the mattress before slowly lifting his head, eyebrows furrowed with concern once he saw her expression. “Y’okay?” He asked, sitting up a bit. No matter how turned on he could get, her wavering voice brought him back to earth. “S’the matter?”

She swallowed and shook her head, “N-nothing, I- I just,” Her voice trailing off as tears began to prick at her eyes again. Harry reached up and cupped her cheek, leaning over to press a kiss to her forehead. “S’alright, we’ll get y’straightened out.” He muttered with distaste in his tone of voice.

     She sat up to pull her shirt off, shivering as she felt his hands sneak up to touch a nipple, nipping at the skin under her belly button. “H-'' She warned, giggling breathlessly, “Y’know that’s ticklish.” He gave a quiet hum and nodded, “Couldn't help m’self. It’s just too easy, pet.”

The coyness in his voice sparked an annoyance she couldn’t place. It held the same sarcastic, ‘i know it all’ tinge as Mark’s did when he was strolling about her kitchen.  She huffed, propping herself up on her elbows. “Do I have to do this myself?” She sniped, “Could get m’self off without all this fuss much faster y’know?” Harry's gentle eyes quickly hardened as he now glared at her, bringing his hand up and around her throat, laying her back down against the bed. Her breath hitched in her throat as he applied some pressure, almost immediately regretting her choice of action. “Let’s be clear, shall we? Nothing that you do, or anyone else for that matter, to your body,” He trailed off, his tongue darting out over his lips as he looked at the girl's smaller frame underneath him. “Could ever, ever, amount to what I can do.” He murmured into her ear, releasing his grip around her throat before sponging kisses down her neck. “Wouldn’t you agree?” He hummed, taking a more sensitive part of her neck gently between his teeth to earn a moan from her lips.

 He hadn’t meant to get so possessive, but he was tired of not getting the recognition he felt he deserves. There was no way Mark had ever taken the time to know her body in the way he has. 

She nodded quickly, rolling her hips up to meet his, “Yes." She breathed out, moving a hand into his hair to tug at. She was getting impatient, the slow side of him wasn’t what she needed. She needed him deep, hard and quick.

“Harry, please” She whined out, groaning in frustration as he pinned her hips back to the bed. He chuckled against her, letting his teeth graze over her nipple before lifting his head. “S’the matter, Y/N?” He mused, raising his brows in mock sympathy, trailing a hand down to duck into the front of her panties. “I’ve had y’wetter than this before, m’sure of it.” He muttered to himself, sliding his fingers through her folds before circling once around her clit, causing her to gasp and lift her hips up at the sudden contact. “No! M’ready, Harry, please.” She begged, squeezing her eyes shut from the anticipation. “Not quite, pet- Open your eyes.” He ordered, taking them both by surprise. He had been too focused on the sounds his fingers were making as they slid through her to notice her eyes closing. He liked to know she saw that it was him, not Mark. All him. 

Y/N whined again and lifted her head, wriggling her hips. “Fuck, H. Please?” She begged again, bringing her hand up to cup his leaking cock through his boxers. His hips spluttered forward and he swore under his breath before swiftly changing his position on the bed to get between her legs to tug her panties off. 

Peeking up from where he lies to catch her line of sight, Harry stuck his tongue out slowly towards her clit, stopping just before he made contact. With pupils dilated, a pout graced across her face and cheeks flushed, Harry could have come right then if he hadn’t been so driven to making his point clear. Kissing at her thigh once, he flattened his tongue out and rolled her clit beneath it slowly. Far too languid for Y/N because now she can’t even lean into his mouth, but has to take the brush and nip of his teeth against her until he granted enough mercy to find her clit again and move a little faster.

Harry hears her begin to pant, quick and shallow, and the sighs and whimpers that are begging for him to ‘Please, fuck me, Harry' He smiled, tightening his grip around her hips, “M’getting there, sweetheart. Want you drenched by the time m’finished.” He reasons, cock twitching when she lets out a desperate groan. Harry ignored the small and desperate cries of frustration, drawing back to watch her wriggle and whine for his touch. He hummed, bringing his middle finger closer to slip into her cunt and felt his lips spreading into a grin at the moans that erupted from her chest as he found her g-spot. Before long, he found himself biting down harshly on his lip as he watched his finger dip in and out so easily that he added another, stretching her out a little more. He loved how messy she could get for him in hardly any time at all. “Relax.” She heard him say calmly, though his mind is a frantic mess of filthy thoughts about how he planned to fuck her anyway she’d let him. Desperate for her to realise who she was to him. He’d never tire of hearing her sweet moans, the way she begged for him to touch her. And every time he found out she went back to him, he would swear to himself, he’d find a way to make her forget about him. He wanted to be unforgettable, like it seemed that Mark was. Who, really didn't have the most fun hobbies, or good humour, didn't mesh well with the group; he wasn't even that intelligent in his opinion. So he couldn’t, for the life of him, figure out what was soo special about him. They’ve all hung out, and Harry tried. He really tried to pinpoint what was so incredible about him in her mind. He’d have to top him somehow, something that reminded her of him had to creep into her thoughts at night. He wanted her as restless as he was without her at night. He wanted her to figure out that he was her safe place. 

When she went quiet, his stomach burned hot enough to pull him out of his thoughts, he knew she was close. He let out a groan, burying his face into her thigh to muffle most of it before turning back to lull her clit back around his tongue. Sucking on it in sharp little movements, he reaffirmed his left arms grip around her thigh to keep her in place. “Harry!” She gasped out, as he pulled his fingers out so he could wrap his hand around his weeping cock, aching for any form of attention and hissed against her when he felt it. He was leaking and it was filthy, so filthy and Harry couldn't stop himself from gruffly nipping at her clit. “Come for me, pet.” He mumbled as he moved his hand from around his cock to preserve himself, moans muffled against her and even more so when her thighs closed around his head and she pressed up into his mouth. She’s coming and the thought of it has Harry rolling his hips into the mattress harder. 

“Fuck sake-” He growled, pushing himself upright to hook his arms under her legs to pull her closer. He took a long look at her body, returning a hand to his angry red cock to try and curb his lust a while longer. He wasn’t done teasing her. “It made her feel important, it’s like extra attention,” she told him one night. 

“Proper mess down here, babe.” He tutted, backing up as her hips lifted to meet his. “Now, now, now, y’still comin down, aren’t you? S’quite sensitive, innit” He mused, tapping the head of his cock against her swollen clit. She gasped, lifting her hips up again. “Seeee?” He hummed, mocking her. “Please, Harry. M’empty.” She whined, and that was it. “Okay, ‘lright, she wants filled.” He hummed as he loomed over her, tucking his head against hers while he lined up, gently nudging past her folds to slip in. “Jesus Chr-” He groaned, his hand finding its way into her hair to tug. “Fucked right in, didn’t I?” He mumbled, sliding his hand to cradle her neck by the hairline, which was irritatingly soft, as he pulled out slowly and tried his best to ignore her protests; “I was full!” She’d gasp out, infuriated that he had taken it away just as quickly. “Fuck sake, doll. Patience.” He rasp out as he pushed right back into the wet heat. “Y’hear that, baby? S’how wet I’ll get you everytime, isn’t it?.” He mused, straightening up and tugged her body up higher to meet his hips, allowing himself to slide just a bit deeper. Deep enough to coax another broken gasp from her mouth. “Tell me how good this is.” He breathed out, before delivering some quick thrusts, his hips pistoning into her. A filthy sloshing sound filled the air from how wet she was. “Fuck!” She gasped out, arching her back up. “Oh my god, Harry. S’good, s’deep, j-just what I wanted.” She whimpered, squeaking as he bottomed out at her admission. She whined in confusion, before choking on a breath when he rolled his hips, grinding into her cunt. The broken moan he finally let out as her walls fluttered around him, squeezing around his cock, could put a priest to shame. She always wrung out the most lewd noises from his body. “My God, you’ll be the death of me.” He groaned, “You feel so fucking good, Y/N, squeezin' me li' tha'.” He all but whimpered, leaning back to properly start fucking her, the way he knows has her seeing stars, her legs shaking, her breathing laboured. 

Louder, and louder she got, gripping onto his forearms with her nails dug in as deep as they could go, trying desperately to hold on in the position he had her in. His long body upright, hands holding her hips up high off the bed so he could make sure he hit his target each time. Her shaking legs wrapped around his, she was struggling under the pleasure. “S’a fuckin’ sight t’see, baby. You’re so bloody beautiful.” He said, taking her hand away from under his arm to bring it to his mouth, sponging kisses at her fingers and wrist. “Takin’ my cock so well.” He sighed, letting her hand go and lowered her hips back down before hovering over her shaking body, placing her thumb at the corner of her mouth. What he did not prepare for, was her tongue to slide out around it to bring into her mouth and suck at. Harry’s jaw dropped, his lips parted as his hips lost their rhythm for a few thrusts. “Look a’ tha’.” He gasped out, just as she let out another delicious moan, “Harry, m’close.” She slurred around his thumb, some drool running down his wrist. “Dirty lit’l minx, come f’me.” He growled, feeling her tighten completely around him. “Give it to me, ‘ve worked for it” He breathed, snapping his hips up harder as she cried out, rolling her hips messily to his just trying to ride it out. “Tha’s my good girl.” Harry cooed, doing his best to help her get the most of her orgasm before losing his self control entirely, burying himself to the hilt as he came. Falling forward on top of her, he felt the coiling in his belly unwind. He sighed, listening to her breathing soften and slow. “Proud of m’self for that one.” He laughed out. And he was, she was satiated, and he got to have a bit more of her for one more day.

     Harry's soft breath hit the top of her shoulder, his body on top of hers with the duvet cover strewn between his legs. Taking a deep breath, she felt most of the stress and anxiety of Mark's pop-in drift away. Shifting to find a comfortable spot against the bed while underneath the warmth of his body. “I don’t think I thank you enough.” She mumbled, tucking her forehead into the crook of his neck. “Think you thank me just fine.” He smirked, lifting up onto his elbows. “Up y’get, sweetheart.” He grumbled, pulling them both up, him standing to pull his boxers back on. “H, would you grab me a shirt from my second drawer down, please?”  She asked, the covers pulled up to her chest with one hand, the other running a hand through her messy hair.

She watched as he grabbed a shirt, unfolded it to see what it looked like in full before tossing it her way. “Like that one.” He snickered, climbing back into the bed. “Know y’don’t wanna talk about it. But…” He started, causing her to groan as she pulled the shirt over her head. “Oh christ,” She whined, laying back down and pulled the covers over her face. “C’mon, I never ever ask!” He laughed, tugging the covers to reveal her eyes which only earned him a grumble of disagreement. After a brief pause (during which she realised he wouldn't give in anytime soon), she rolled her eyes and hastily blurted out, “He went on a date last night, and in the morning, I was showering and he showed up, breakfast in hand. Tells me it was originally for the girl he went out with and fucked, only, come to find out she slipped out while he was at the shop,” She paused, drawing another breath but speaking a bit slower. Not particularly liking the way her tongue had formed around them. Like tasting metal. “aaand brought it to me instead.” She murmured, swallowing thickly, “Like it was a good thing.” Laying it all out in summary had her feeling more embarrassed by the second. Harry groaned, shaking his head. “Why’d’y’ put up with it? Why don’t you just- block his number?” His voice going a bit softer towards the end before he sighed, knowing exactly why.

She stayed quiet, looking back up to the ceiling. “Wouldn’t you? Put up with it?” She asked, her voice barely above a whisper. She felt shame come over her, like a cloud across the sun. 

     Harry sighed again, rolling onto his back to look at the ceiling too. I do, put up with it. He thought, his eyes scanning the ceiling for a good answer. “Don’t think you’d have to, had he given you the chance to move on.” He muttered, almost angrily. “Wasn’t right of ‘im. T’break things off and then ask the next night for a quick fuck.” He huffed, propping himself up on his elbows again. 

     Y/N sighed and nodded, “I know..” A few minutes went by before she shook her head, desperate to change the subject. “Look, can we just watch something?” She mumbled, pulling the duvet up over her waist. “Yeah… yeah sure.” Harry said, reaching over for the remote to turn the tv on. “Found something that might be good the other night. Saved it to watch it with you.” He snickered, coaxing a smile out of her. “I can’t wait.” She hummed, turning to her side to curl up against him. His arm snaked around her waist, his head tilted to rest against hers and he took a deep breath. For the next two hours, they just laid there. I really should thank him more often, she thought.

      “Listen, not that I wouldn’t love to stay longer, I just promised m’mum I’d take her out for dinner.” He said once the movie was over, leaning over to kiss her forehead again. “Y’okay?” He asked again, and she smiled, propping herself up as well.

“Because I can manage another fifteen minutes before I need to shower, change and pick her up.” He added, his eyebrows straightening into a line to show the severity of what he was saying. “I’ll be available until about 4, we usually do a bit of catching up- probably bout an hour or so, y’know what- I’ll just text you.” He laughed. “Yeah, I’ll manage.” She hummed, tilting her head slightly to the side. “Call me, anytime. Mean it.” He said, standing to get himself dressed, Y/N standing as well to walk him out. 

“G’on.” She snickered, leaning up to kiss his cheek before he stepped out of the flat, shutting the door behind him. She sighed, reaching up hesitantly to lock the door, before taking another pitiful look at the picked apart muffin that still sat on that table. Mocking me. She scoffed before going back to her room to repeat the night prior. 

She’d always been used to being alone, just not lonely. She had friends, sure, and good friends at that. But they’ve all got so much going on, she couldn’t imagine bringing her little broken heart to the table and try to put it up there with Jodie’s, who’s unsure where she’s going to get the extra 5k to keep her dead mothers house from going to the bank. It just wasn’t right. 

     You’ve got all day, miss thing. Best find something to do with it. 

She glanced at the time again, and took a look around her apartment.  The bottles, the empty cigarette packs on any windowsill you look at, chinese takeout boxes, the dishes, the bottles. Groaning at the thought of doing all that, she let her body fall back into the chair in the living room. 

Pinching her brows together, she let out a frustrated sigh, “I see you, just let me gather herself.” She said to herself, and only when she moved her hand from her eyes did they land on a small little jar and its green contents on the coffee table. Perfect. Blunt time. 

 Once she got a small little blunt rolled up, she put some music on and sat on her bedroom windowsill, grabbing a lighter to take a drag. While making sure to blow it out the cracked open window, she peered down to the streets below. A cold breeze came across her nose, reminding her that the seasons changed once again. A colder fall meets eastern England with a ferocity, signalling a chilling winter to come. Couples walked through the streets to make their dinner reservations, or ‘first daters’ even, chatting as they window shop. She always loved watching the world around her operate.  Sighing yet again as she reminded herself that she was supposed to finish cleaning, she sat up, leaving the blunt on the ashtray a second to get to tidying the bed up. Smoking always puts her in a better mood. A nice distraction, she thought as she set the pillows and blankets back into place. She crept over to pick the blunt up and take another hit before pushing it into the ashtray to snub the cherry. “Christ, what time is it?” She said aloud, deciding to dig around for her nightstands clock that had been knocked to the ground. Finding it and setting it back in place, she was thankful that 6pm was here. She had gotten the apartment tidied, she was high as hell. There was no trace of anything Mark to be seen. Like he’d never been here so early. I wonder if he was sad. Upset that he’d put himself out there and assumed she’d stay for breakfast. She didn’t see how different it could be with hi- She cringed to herself and shook her head, trying to shake the train of thought away. She didn’t want to go back down the road, try to find out where exactly it went wrong. He left. He’s no different than the rest. And what’s worse, he takes advantage of the fact. He knows how you feel. 

The streets were alive and well, lit with streetlights, some storefront lighting, and car headlights. Daring a glance over at her liquor cabinet, she grabbed her phone and called some friends to get together for drinks in her newly cleaned apartment in order to carpool together to the bar.

Jodie arrived first, her best girl, Cade trailing just a bit behind her, “Daphne’s on the way, she said she had a last minute outfit change.” Jodie explained, leaning in for a kiss on the cheek as she handed over her gift of liquor for the night. “S’always vodka with you.” Y/N grinned, heading to the kitchen to get some mixers. 

“Harry’s out with his mum but he said he’d meet us there.” She nodded in acknowledgement to Cade who was reading what she assumed to be Harry’s response in the groupchat, bringing out cups and ice. Cade was fairly new to the group, but a welcomed one at that. They had lost Julie and Chris to a new move up country, which was a huge blow to their outings for a while. Cade filled the gap seamlessly, he was hysterical, dependable, not to mention outlandish. Cade had never been one to back down from a challenge, and seemed to be crushing heavily on Jodie for a while, so if by tonight they were to get a little more familiar with one another, Y/N wouldn't complain.

Daphne came trailing in not long after them, setting her coat in the closet before greeting us all. “So sorry, had it all figured out, but- you know, the lighting in the bar wouldn’t have worked the correct magic. Had to change.” She explained, beaming ear to ear as she made her way into the apartment, her heels clicking on the hardwood floor. Everyone knew that whatever Daphne put on, a burlap sack, aluminium foil, a fucking bedsheet, she looked gorgeous. She had a million dollar smile, a sense of humour, honey blonde hair, olive coloured skin and an incredible body. And if we’re being truthful, her and Harry would be the obvious match. Their physical appearances complimented the other so effortlessly. They’d even been caught in a drunken makeout once before, back when Harry first joined the group.  Nevertheless, Daphne was the secret weapon. The three of them together were like a wet dream turned nightmare. And though Y/N’s friendship with Daphne wasn’t as close as with Jodie, she still held a significant spot in her life. They’d all known each other since university, just kids. Daphne had an atrocious haircut and didn’t know how to dress her body to save her life. Jodie was so smart and shy, it wasn’t until Mike came around their senior year where she learned to assert herself and let loose. Y/N, herself, was just happy with her two girls. She never looked elsewhere. They’d go to parties and end up back at one of our dorms, trashed and giggly. What else was there? 

Looking at them together now, you’d never guess how reserved they used to be in their younger days.

By the time they ordered the Uber, they had all worked up a pretty nasty buzz which made it quite difficult to figure out where they had ended up leaving our phones, wallets, keys, etc. Poor Cade did his best to wrangle the girls together and keep track of all the belongings, but to no avail. He’d have to try again next time. “I saw yours in the bathroom, Jod.” Daphne giggled out, lifting up Y/N’s phone and frowning before handing it to her. “Why’s Harry texting you? Can he not make it?” She asked, a pout clear on her lips. 

“Uhhh, dunno- let’s see.” Y/N opened her phone to check the message, ‘Dropping mum off now. See you in 30. Xx’ she repeated out loud for her even though Daphne had already peered over her shoulder. “He texts you a lot.” She states, pursing her lips and opening them again before Jodie interrupted, “Got yours, Daph!” She shouts, grinning and Y/N has to send her a look of relief because she was not prepared to break Daphne’s drunk heart tonight. She had always had the suspicion she still liked him, and if the look on her face didn’t cement that, what would?

Y/N’s phone rang in the middle of her conversation about Cade’s poor choice of beer as the four sat at a booth, “M’gonna go get a real drink. Be right back.” She smiled, lifting the phone to her ear as she walked away. “Hello?” “What are you doing tonight?” His voice slid across the speaker like cashmere. Y/N swallowed thickly, pressing her finger to her ear to drown out the outside noise. “I’m busy.” She shouted over the music, then rolled her eyes. He had to have heard the music. He’s not stupid. 

“Y’don’t have to yell.” He laughed, “C’mon ditch it. We’re callin’ it a night, so… Come over.” He drawled out. Great, he’s drunk. “No, thank you.” Y/N hummed, having already snuck into the bathroom where it was a bit quieter. “And why not?” He huffed, and just from knowing him, she could tell that his jaw dropped, his fingers tapping against whatever was nearest. “Because,” She paused, fixing a few fly aways while looking at her reflection in the mirror.  “I’m having more fun here.” She giggled before hanging up, and dug into her purse to grab a comb she had brought. 

Her phone rings again, and she felt the satisfaction begin to creep its way into her. This must be what it feels like for him. She cleared her throat and picked up the drink she had set down on the sink. “Hello?” She sang, making sure to jostle her drink that was now more ice than liquid. “I need another drink, so, hurry-“ She added, smirking at herself in the mirror and wrapped her lips around the straw to suck the last bits of alcohol left. “Wh’dya’ mean you’re having more fun?!” He huffed, as if it was unimaginable to him. Y/N scoffed, topping up her lip colour before turning on her heel to go back out to the bar. “Just what I said.” She hummed, “I’m hanging up now,” She whispered before hearing a slew of small half-minded minor threats, asking her not to hang up, ‘wait, wait, wait!’, She ignored them all, giggling out a ‘good night’ before hanging up again and leaving the bathroom. Finding her way through to the bar and grabbed herself two more drinks before making it towards the back where her friends had sat.

Thankfully, Harry had got out of his date with his mum just in time to meet them at The Stumble. And she was semi-glad he did. Well, very glad. He helped in a lot of ways. And he was just nice in general to be around. Harry smiled at the sight of her, opening an arm to invite her back into the circle.

 “Daph’s just getting around to tellin’ us her big secret.” He hummed, his eyes lingering just a litttttllleee too long at her body. He couldn’t help it. And he did try. But his eyes just found their way to her every time. Good God, she looked amazing. A black half mesh/half satin dress that was somehow modest and managed to leave a bit to the imagination, some sort of strapped black heels that snaked their way up her legs, a softened reddish lipstick. Honestly, out of a dream. Once, of course, he realised her attention had been taken away by Daphne,(who (he thought) was getting around to telling everyone about her job’s promotion) he felt he could look at Y/N as long as he needed. He knew Mark wasn’t stupid. He’d figure out how special she was, and how truly stupid he was to have let her slip through his fingers. How fucking lucky he was- To have had her. Really have her. And sure, he had her too. As close as he could muster, he had her, for now. He answered her calls, day or night, 1am, 2am, 3am, cor. 3am was probably his favourite time. She was so sleepy, so hurt, she had just wanted company. And Harry liked to think she wanted his company. Just thinking about how he had thrown it away? Like, garbage? How fucking dumb he is to- Harry’s jaw clenched so hard it began to cramp, and the hand he didn’t know that was laid across the small of her back had found its way around her hips, gripping the far side of her waist tightly, causing her to yelp and turn around. “S’the matter w’you?” She laughed out, her hand delicately holding the straw in place with two fingers as she brought her lips around it for a sip with her other hand. Those, fucking lips. He cleared his throat and shook his head, “Lost m'balance- Liquor must’ve hit me.” He laughed, “S’hot in here, gonna pop outside for a smoke.” Harry nodded, gently patting her back as he slid past her.

      He could feel his ears ringing, like smoke was coming out of them. He’d really like to tell Mark just what a total degenerate he had been, but, it may knock too much sense into him. And he’d never have Y/N again. He needed some more time. You can’t do that, she’s hurt enough. She’ll just have to wisen up. And then Mark won’t have the chance. 

    Finally, the cool air hit Harry’s face, his hands scrambling through his pockets for his pack and a lighter. 

     The first drag was all he needed, just to turn his brain around. With a sigh, he blew out the smoke, leaning his body against the side of the bar’s building. He watched people pass, people scoot past him to get inside the bar. He watched a small family walk up to a newly parked food truck. Kinda late for food trucks, innit. He thought to himself, raising his hand for another drag and immediately felt a comforting and familiar hand at his shoulder. Y/N. 

      “Wh’y’ doin out here?” He asked, looking down at her. She had to be a little cold. Mind you, shes again only wearing her slim dress, the damn strappy snaky heels- No jacket. As always. “You’ll freeze.” He muttered, pulling his off to drape around her shoulders. “Thank you, Harry, but I’m alright. Just checking on you.” She said warily, knowing full well that he hardly ever would leave in the middle of someone’s proud moment to go smoke. That just wasn’t like him. “Are you upset Daphne’s moving?” She asked, reaching for his cigarette to take a drag of her own. Moving? “Er- yeah, I mean-“ He stuttered, unable to recover. His stupid brain was still fixated on her lips. “Because there’s a train that connects right to our station- and she said she’d be here any and every time she could manage. She said she couldn’t stay away from you too long.” Y/N nodded, a hopeful glimmer in her eye. Harry furrowed his eyebrows at her, “She- what?” Now he was so confused. “Daphne’s like- in love, with you Harry. You really never knew?” Y/N laughed out, and it sort of pissed Harry off. Like it was so obvious for her to see that someone else was in love with him, but not see that he was in love with her. Of course he never knew, because he’s been so busy trying to soothe Y/N and get her to see what was in front of her. Course he wasn’t worried about, Daphne, of all things. “No, I didn’t know-“ He almost snapped, irritated with it all now. “Oh my God, Harry! She drools!” Y/N giggled out, shaking her head and finishing off her drink. “Never stops looking at you, and! She glares at me when we’re talking.” Harry could tell by how her eyes began to glaze over that she was feeling the effects of her drink. Realising, it wasn’t fair to get angry with her. “Drools, huh?” He managed out in a chuckle, his throat feeling tight, like he was swallowing nails. She nodded and hummed, “She saw our texts, Har. Should’ve seen her face, she really likes you.” She slurred a bit, leaning up to his ear, “I know I shouldn’t..” She started, humming a bit before she sighed out, “I can’t stop thinkin’ bout y’ kissing me.” She whispered, giggling at the end. Harry had to shut his eyes, squeeze them shut. In another world, Harry would’ve laid it on her, right then and there. No regard for the outside world around them. His hands made their way to the small of her back, briefly pulling her in closer. “Y/N…” He warned, “We’re supposed to be keeping it a secret.” He mumbled back, his mouth felt like it was bleeding. He wasn’t able to say anything that he wanted to. But, he would have a hard time forgiving himself if whatever was so bad about being with him had to be kept quiet and had come out. She’d never be back. Harry felt like he had the devil and the angel on either shoulder. The angel, reminding him how delicate she’d been lately, all the while in his left ear, he could hear the devil asking him to breathe her in. Because she did smell fantastic. She whined and tugged at his shirt, pouting a bit with a soft, “Why?” And Harry lost it. All sense was gone, he let out a frustrated growl of sorts and gave one gentle yank to her hair to tip her head back, causing her to yelp and smirk at him.  Why? Why indeed. In one second, Harry had pressed his lips to hers, backing her up against the building, his hands moving so fast. Too fast. Her cheeks, her hair, her waist, her ass. Christ, what a sweet little ass she had. Harry groaned into her mouth, licking at her lip like honey fell from it. Y/N giggled in response, hooking an arm around his neck, her hand at the back of it. He was revelling in the freedom he was feeling to publicly have her in his arms. Harry felt like his heart was beating out of his chest, and just as he was about to muster enough control to pull away from her, “What the fuck are you doing?” with a quick jerk away from the beautiful woman. Mark.

“So, you’re fucking Harry? Harry?!” Mark shouted, his breaths coming out short but forceful. He was pissed, thats for sure. Y/N glared at him, having to lean against the clubs bathroom sink after he dragged her inside.  “I don’t know why it’s any of your business.” she snapped, “We aren’t together anymore, that was your decision.” Mark's head snapped up at her, his eyes wide and his eyebrows furrowed, “That doesn’t mean I’d be alright with you and one of my good friends fucking?!” He shouted, pulling at his hair as if he was going insane. "I'd hardly call you guys friends." She scoffed, folding her arms over her chest, “And, forgive me if I never received the handbook on what to do if your ex breaks up with you but still wants to fuck, oh! And! fucks other girls only to bring you their breakfast the next morning!” She shouted back, furious at him. “I shouldn’t even be having this argument with you, because in what world did you think it would be okay to come to the bar I was at!” She asked, narrowing her eyes at him. If Harry hadn’t been there, and Mark had walked through that door while she was drunk? She knew he would’ve walked through that front door and all she’d be thinking of, was which girl he’d take home the whole night. It was fun for a second to give him a taste of his own medicine but he was much, much better at this than she was.

     Mark hadn’t stopped pacing, his fingernails practically embedding themselves into his palms due to how tightly he had his fists balled up. It took everything in him not to throw Harry in front of a moving car after he ripped him away from Y/N. Out of everything, not once did he expect to have walked up on…. whatever that was. He couldn’t believe that it was Harry that had his hands around her like that. “Okay, well,” He started, his eyes dancing around a minute, “If you had said you wanted to suck Harry’s cock tonight when I was on the phone with you, maybe,” He seethed, his voice dripping with anger, “I’d have gone home!” He growled out, unsure of what he wanted to do now. His pride had taken a major plummeting fall. Y/N. His heart throbbed, painfully in fact. “Oh,” She scoffed out, “Please, you’re lucky I answered the phone at all! It’s none, of your, business!” She repeated, leaning forward a bit as she did. Mark laughed incredulously, “That would have been better, Y/N. Because then you wouldn’t have tried to play your little cat and mouse game, get me to think you wanted me here, and we wouldn’t be here!” He shouted, his arms opening up to gesture to the space of the bathroom. 

“My cat and mouse game?!” She practically laughed out, leaning forward a bit. She couldn’t believe her ears. “Ever since you broke up with me, it’s been nothing but games! You ended it because all I was good for was a fuck! Don’t forget that.”  He went quiet, the only sound was the softened thump of the music from the club. Y/N swallowed thickly and straightened up, “Are you done?” She muttered, “Because I have some friends waiting on me.” 

Mark scoffed, shaking his head, “Yeah, think I am.” 

So off she went, without another look at him. She slipped around the corner and hurried off to the corner where her friends were at. “And where’s Harry?” Y/N asked, looking around and not seeing a particular set of eyes. She was beyond irritated and feeling the embarrassment creeping up on her. The way they all looked at her told her that they had seen, everything. She shuffled in her spot slightly before straightening up and grabbing her bag. “Y’ears not workin’? Something trapped in em’?  I said where the fuck is Harry?” She snapped, watching a few scramble for answers. “He-He never- he didnt-“ Cade stuttered, sighing in relief as Daphne finished for him, “He never came back in.” Y/N groaned before turning on her heel to head out as well. Poor Daphne. She began hurrying down the street to get away from the club as fast as possible, scrambling for her phone and immediately dialed out Harry’s number. No answer. 

   To: Harry 

      Where did you go?

      They saw everything. 

      I’m trying to call you, Harry, please. 

                  Read 9:57pm

   She tried his number, again, no answer.

    Finally flagging down a cab, she hopped in and gave his address without a second thought. The whole drive there, she went over the last twelve hours or so. She couldn't believe the way Mark was acting. Of all the dumbest, insulting things to do or say, showing up at random times. The fucking nerve. He knows how she feels, and yet, he uses it whenever his poor ego needs a pick me up. And then to embarrass her, and possibly Harry as well? Because he can’t stand to feel unimportant? 

    The driver came to a slow, rolling stop and she quickly paid the driver before hurrying up his driveway, to the steps to his apartment and began rapping her cold knuckles painfully against the door. Please be here. Please be here. Embarrassment washed over her again like a tidal wave. She felt awful, anxious, the whole bid. He could have a girl here. And then if he didn’t go home?  Who was she to assume she single-handedly ruined his night? His neighbours assume she’s on drugs and call the police- And then! Her drivers went and drove off- his neighbours think she’s crazy… Cor, Y/N. You’ve really thought this one out. Just brilliant.

As she turned to pull her phone from her pocket to call up another driver, she heard a jingle of house keys coming up the drive. Her head snaps up to see Harry, who was having a bit of trouble walking a straight line as he focused on looking at his keyring, trying to find the front door’s match. “Wh- Harry!” She breathed out, blinking in disbelief. Harry’s head snapped up, his eyebrows furrowed and grumbled a bit. “What’re y’doin’ ‘ere, Y/N?” He muttered sadly, trying to move around her but gently bumping into her shoulder instead as he made his way around. “Don’t think ‘ve got it in me t’help,” He hiccupped and tried to fit the key into the hole before starting again, “help y’out tonight.” He whimpered, resting his forehead against the door after struggling. Y/N frowned and hurried up the steps again, taking the keys from him. “Why didn’t you answer my calls?” She asked, fitting the key in and opening the door for him.

His shoulders slumped forward, grumbling his answer as he shuffled into his house. Choosing to ignore the drunken gibberish, she moved towards the kitchen to grab him a glass of water, watching as he fell backwards into his couch. 

As she turned the corner to set his glass down on the coffee table, he, again, muttered something she couldn’t understand. “What was that?” Y/N asked, sitting down next to him. He sighed and leaned forward, “Went to a, uh- different bar.” He breathed out, taking the glass of water for a sip. “F-for a few drinks, t’clear m’head.” His fingers tapped at the glass before lifting the glass to his lips again. “I-I shouldn’t ‘ve…” He sighed and shook his head firmly, ending his sentence there before continuing again. “Y’asked why I hadn’t err…. answered y’phone, or, my phone.” He grumbled, feeling frustrated he couldn’t get a good explanation for her. “I thought you were heading back wiv’im.” He whispered, chewing at the inside of his lip to stop himself from admitting anything else. “Harry, I came here to apologise. I embarrassed myself a-and, maybe even you, I'm just, I-I’m so sorry.” She sighed, shaking her head before feeling the weight of his head against her shoulder. “S’not,” another hiccup interrupted him, “S’not y’fault, Y/N.” He whispered, a slow yawn following suit, his full body weight now resting against her. She managed a half-smile as she began sliding to the side under his weight deciding to drop the topic for now and let her head fall to the throw cushion sitting at the corner of the sofa. His head fell onto her chest and he yawned again. “Could never stay mad at you f’long.” He mumbled, bringing his legs up to get comfier in his position. A smile crept its way across her lips, her hand finding a comfortable position at his hair. “S’not fair to you.” She whispered, pressing a kiss to his forehead before leaning up to turn the lamp out. “You’re too good t'me, Harry.” She murmured, reaching for the throw blanket to spread over his body. His only response was to briefly squeeze her and it wasn’t long afterwards that she could hear his peaceful snoring.

[part II.] [part III.]

(a/n: its hereeeee!! i hope you all like it, this has been sitting in my google docs for literal yearrrssss as something I’d read for comfort every now and then. literally this story idea has been in my head, i can hear harry and y/n talking constantly in my head. feedback, reblogs, likes are greatly appreciated!!)

#harry smut #harry styles imagine #harry styles angst #harry angst #harry styles fanfic #harry styles x reader #harry x reader #harry styles one shot #harrys house #harry styles on tour #harry styles reader insert #harry styles tumblr #harry styles au #harry styles friends to lovers #harry styles fic #harry styles #harry styles fwb #harry writing #harry styles writing #harry styles x you #comfort!harry #best friend!harry #bestfriend!harry #sick of you #sick of you!harry

[complexcritterscave]

HI I’M SORRY FOR THE SPIVE ANGST SORRY CHAT PLEASE LOVE ME I’M SORRY PLEASE LOOK I’M DOING FLUFF TO MAKE YOU HAPPY PLEASE DON’T PLACE MY HEAD ON STICK PWETTY PWEASEEEEE I’M JUST A BABY A BABY WRITER DON’T HURT MWEEEEEEE

Fanfic based off THIS LOVELY PERSON’S ART PLEASE SHOW THEM SOME LOVE NOWWWWW 💛🖤💛🖤💛🖤💛🖤💛🖤

Anyway fanfic starts now :3

Mornings…

Who would want to leave the soft and warm comfort of their bed? The embrace of one’s sheets wrapped around them as if they were but a small infant once more.

There was not a single person in the world who actually enjoyed getting up.

Absolutely no one..

Not a single person…

Nope!

Okay that might have been just a teeny tiny lie…

Well… Not really a lie? How am I supposed to know, I’m just a narrator get off my back!

Moving on…

There really was one person who enjoyed mornings. For her, that meant she had lived to see another day. That she had evaded capture once more. No one could catch a genius, a reborn, intuitive Einstein as she would say. That’s right! Bive was the smartest cookie there was!

Mornings were a sign of hope, that she still had a chance to spread the truth! A chance to save everyone. Of course some were too far gone to be saved and would have to suffer the consequences for when the clowns came and snow soldiers took over but they picked their poison. They made their bed. They dug their graves. Now they had to lay in them when the time came.

Besides! Even if she couldn’t save everyone, she could save some of them! She could use her cleverness to think of plans to save those who listened. Her brains to find solutions to their biggest problems. She could accomplish anything as long as she was wide awake, as long as the gears in her head were constantly turning!

…

So why weren’t they spinning now?

She stared at her corkboard, her expression dull as she leaned against the brick wall of the maze. She felt horrible. Her head was killing her and her special brew wasn’t helping her in the slightest. If anything it made it worse! She felt top heavy and ill, her arms and legs acted as if they were a fruity gelatine. Maybe even a sweet lime flavour gelatine…

If that didn’t sound awful already. She was groggy and irritated. Her cat-like reflexes were more like a snail’s and her vision would occasionally blur.

What in the name of Clown Militia was going on with her?!

She let out an annoyed groan as she used the wall to keep herself upright before eventually succumbing and falling over. It was as if her own body were betraying her!

Useless vessel. Didn’t know she was the reason it was even alive! Talk about ungrateful…

There had to be someone she could trust to assist her. DrRETRO? No. That furball thought she was insane. Poob? No. They’d make it worse with their constant partying. Mark? He’d try and fix her with some sort of wood trick. Wallter? He trusts the flowers… Absolutely not…

Wait… God it was worse than she thought. She couldn’t even CONTACT any of them! None of them had her signal! Oh the fool she was! A complete and total fool!

Who had her radio signal..? Her memory was a bit fogged at the moment but she knew she gave it to someone..

Aha! Split! At least she thinks so? She couldn’t remember very well. She reached for her radio, twisting and turning the knobs as she attempted to reach the fruit-taur, letting out a cry of pain from the feedback and hissing through her teeth.

She let out a quiet sigh, trying to ignore the splitting pain that shot through her head, with every knob turn a new static frequency filling the air. Her voice croaking as she spoke into the radio.

"Split?"

"Split are you there?!"

The fruit-taur was sleeping peacefully in her own bed, a small banana-themed night light shining on her nightstand beside her alarm clock. It was still frankly early, only about 4am.

All was quiet…

"SPLIT!"

… Until it wasn’t…

Split immediately shot up, breathing heavily as she was suddenly awoken from her restful slumber. Her heart racing as she glanced around frantically.

"WHO’S THERE?! SHOW YOURSELF! I KNOW KUNG FU! I’VE SEEN ENOUGH MOVIES TO KNOW WHAT I’M DOING!"

Despite being unable to see, she immediately went on the defensive, tensing up as she tried to look as threatening as possible.

"Split…? Split are you there? Split..? Split!"

She turned towards her nightstand, the adrenaline dying down as it slowly became replaced with tired realization. She grabbed her glasses, putting them on before reaching for the radio.

"SPLIT?! Oh no. DID THE CLOWNS GET YOU?! OH GOD THIS IS AWFUL THEY KIDNAPPED HER?! WHAT AM I GONNA DO?! If they got her… THEN THEY’RE ATTACKING NOW! OH MY GOD OH MY GOD! THAT MEANS THEY’RE COMING FOR ME NEXT! I GOTTA GET OUT OF HERE BEFORE THEY CATCH ME AND-"

"Bivey, you’re spiralling again…"

Bive’s side of the radio went quiet, as if she were processing the moment before answering.

"SPLIT YOU’RE OKAY- AcK- Ow ow radio feedback ow."

Split couldn’t help but smile, finding her worry endearing before speaking up.

"Yes, I’m fine. What’s going on with you? It’s uh…"

She glanced at the clock.

"Four in the morning. I don’t even think the early bird gets up this early!"

"IT’S AN EMERGENCY! THERE’S SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME!"

"What-?"

Well that was concerning news.

"What do you mean something is wrong with you?"

"MY BODY IS ACTING WEIRD. I THINK I MAY HAVE BEEN POISONED! SOMEONE POISONED ME!"

She listened as the detective rambled on and on, blinking as she tried to slowly put everything together.

"Poisoned-? Bive what-? No one poisoned you. You probably just have a cold."

"THAT’S IMPOSSIBLE! I CAN’T GET SICK! I-"

"Okay okay fine! You’re not sick! Just calm down."

"HOW CAN I CALM DOWN WHEN I’VE BEEN POISONED?!"

"Oh my… Bive? Just… Stay calm for now? I’ll be over soon."

Guess she wasn’t sleeping in like she originally planned. She sighed as Bive rambled some incoherent words before the radio went dead, having no clue what she said before she got up. She was just in a comfortable T-shirt, that’s decent enough to go out.

It’s not like anyone would see her, it was too early for someone to be out and about on the elevator… Apart from her of course…

Bive was leaning against the wall, her head still throbbing and body still weak. She felt awful. There was no way she WASN’T poisoned. How was this even possible?! Even if they DID make it through the maze, how did they catch her off guard?! She was awake the whole time!

This was worse than she thought. Her enemies were getting smarter. They had found her location, slipped through the maze, and caught her off guard while she was on guard! Oh this was horrible. Truly terrible! How could she save anyone in her weakened state?!

The next hours were spent in agony. Well at least it felt like hours, it had really been only thirty minutes as she sat there patiently. Waiting for the Split’s arrival.

Speaking of Split, she was already stepping off the elevator, standing outside of the maze as she yawned. The sun hadn’t even risen yet, it wasn’t even dawn. She entered the maze, knowing her way decently enough to where she couldn’t get lost and only worrying about Scary Mike and an overly excited Fleshy, more so Mike, as she navigated herself through it.

Turning one of corners, she noticed the soft glow of a yellow light. Bingo. She quickened her pace down the hall, the strong scent of coffee wafting over her as the glow became stronger. Soon enough, she was met with the living quarters of the paranoid detective.

It was just as unorganized as she remembered, red string and empty styrofoam cups littered the floor. At least she listened to her the last time Split was over and picked up the thumbtacks, those were just accidents waiting to happen. Her floppy ears lifted as she heard a quiet and pained groan, looking down to see that Bive was on the floor, against the wall, with her head in her hands.

"Bive?"

She let out a startled yelp, trying to jump back only to met with a brick wall as she hissed through gritted teeth. That didn’t help with her headache and weak body at all… She looked up at the fruit-taur, a wave of relief and realization washing over her.

"SPLIT-! HI! HELLO…"

"Are you okay?"

"No! I’ve been POISONED! I’m going to DIE!"

"You’re not going to die."

"YES I AM!"

"Why do you think that?"

"BECAUSE THERE’S SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME!"

She winced in pain as she felt another debilitating stroke of pain shoot through her head, gritting her teeth and using the wall to stand as she leaned against it. Seeing her state, Split grew concerned. Her being poisoned was a stretch but there was very well a chance she may have done or eaten something that could cause her this much harm.

"Can you tell me exactly what you’re feeling right now..?"

"Er-! A stupid headache… I feel a bit nauseous… lightweight… Annoyed with everything.."

"Have you eaten?"

"Yes…"

"Have you had some water?"

"..Yes…"

"Have you slept..?"

"…"

"Have. You. Slept?"

"Uh… No…"

"When’s the last time you have?"

"…"

"Bive… When was the last time you slept?"

"Hold on. I’m trying to remember…"

"You shouldn’t have to remember! It should’ve been recently!"

"BUT THAT LEAVES ME VULNERABLE TO THE CLOWNS AND SO-"

"You’re also vulnerable to them if you DON’T sleep!"

Touché…

"Oh please, I’m not even tired!"

"Doesn’t mean anything!"

"I think it means a lot!"

"Do you want to feel better or not?"

"I do."

"Then go to sleep!"

"But-!"

"No no! I don’t wanna hear it. No buts! If you’re that worried about being attacked by someone, I can just stay with you! Problem solved!"

Bive stared at Split for a moment. She’s never had her stay over. But seeing how much the fruit-taur wanted her to sleep, she knew she didn’t have much of a choice.

"Fine."

"Thank you…"

Split watched as the detective huffed and left to go get ready for bed, smiling as she grumbled underneath her breath. Even if she wasn’t happy with the idea, it was certainly necessary.

She continued to wait patiently before Bive reappeared, no longer in her classic coat and pants but in her own sleepwear.

"I don’t like this."

"Too bad. You need it."

"Do I though?"

"Go to bed."

Seeing as she wasn’t going to be able to wriggle herself away from this situation, she groaned before heading off back to her room, falling onto the bed and just laying there while waiting for fall asleep. She wasn’t very good at this thing…

Split stood outside the door, still feeling sluggish but forcing herself to stay awake. She had no idea what time it was since Bive owned no clocks; something about time being stopped and how every other clock was a fake, but it felt as if it were still early. She felt herself dozing off, but tried to fight against it. Right as she was about to drift off to sleep, she felt someone tap her shoulder.

"Split…? I can’t sleep."

She jerked awake, staring down at Bive before sighing.

"Are you okay?"

"I’m fine! Just tired.."

"Oh…"

"…"

"Do you wanna sleep in my bed?"

"What?"

"I MEAN YOU DON’T HAVE TO! I just thought.. Ya know!"

She stared tiredly down at the stammering and jittery detective, a small grin appearing on her face.

"I’ll take you up on that offer…"

Bive paused, looking at Split before forcing out a nervous laugh.

"AHAH! Uh OKAY!"

She led the fruit-taur into her room, watching as she dragged her paws towards the bed. She paused midway before looking towards Bive.

"Wait. Where are you gonna sleep?"

"Uhh… I just… won’t? Since I’m not tired..?"

She gave her a nervous smile, flashing her yellow tinted teeth at Split. Unfortunately for her, the other’s gaze hardened.

"Alright, I’ll just fix it this way."

Before she could get a reply out, she was dragged into the bed with her, the fruit-taur was holding her close as she sighed.

"This… This isn’t necessary you know?"

"Yes it is."

"But-"

"Bivey?"

"… Yes?"

"Goodnight."

"… Goodnight, Split.."

Bive fell quiet, listening quietly as Split’s breathing eventually slowed into quiet snores. She laid there a moment, before clinging onto the other, snuggling against her before sighing. A sudden wave of exhaustion washed over her as she began drifting off.

"Goodnight…"

RAHHHHHHH FANFIC FINISHED. Sorry if it isn’t as good as my angst fic, I hope you enjoyed it though!!!!!

Omw to work on the Cheshire Cat doomed yuri fanfic someone double dog dared me to write now bye sillies <3

#regretevator #regretevator bive #regretevator split #bive regretevator #bive #split #split regretevator #bive x split #split x bive #regretevator spive #spive regretevator #spive #she regret on my evator

[quodekash]

guys jokezo just made out and now they have to share a bed together. just chew on that for a bit.

NO, DON'T GIVE ME THEM SITTING ON A BUS

GIVE ME WHAT HAPPENED WHEN THEY HAD TO SLEEP IN THE SAME FREAKING BED IMMEDIATELY AFTER THEY MADE OUT

👀

(they made out last night btw)

(just in case anyone forgot)

(and then they had to share a bed)

ass x7

also zo is fully just not doing anything lmao

everyone's pushing with all their might and zo is just 🧍‍♂️

FUIWEBSDGIOUVEWJBOGD

oh the desperate thigh grab

yeah, im with him on this, they need to talk about it. especially about how they had to slEEP IN THE SAME FREAKING BED AFTER THAT

welp. I guess joke's day was just ruined in a slap to the face disguised as a few words

AND THE WAY HE TAKES HIS HAND OFF ZO'S THIGH AFTER THAT????? OUCHHHH

I must say tho, this is really giving episode-6-of-bad-buddy

its very patpran-post-rooftop-kiss-core

the vibes be gay and yearning and very very sad

OKAY, THE MOTHER, FINALLY

a few things to say about her

1. she's gorgeous

2. DAMN she is SHORT

3. I was rewatching the first four episodes yesterday and today because I could, and I noticed in the first episode, zo asked his friends to not tag him in photos they took at the bar, because "I don't want my mum to see"

but my question is... why? he's just out drinking with friends, he's an adult, he's not being irresponsible or anything, so why doesn't he want her to see the photos?

is it something to do with what his mum thinks of him? is she overbearing? does she have high expectations of him? does she kinda suck?

she's probably lovely though, and ill end up adding her to my list-of-fictional-parents-to-get-adopted-by (it's a very long list)

I guess we shall find out today as the episode progresses

oh, honey, you're so queer

the amount of times ive done exactly this

she's so short its hilarious omg

also: ive decided I love his mum

she's so sweet

and neither of them know how to use a stove and I think that's so hilarious and endearing

HSDHSHFSHDHHS

(also: this scene is making me think of akkayan at aye's house having a meal with his mum and rhbgdhjgb)

he's putting two and two together

the few braincells he has that aren't dedicated to debating are whirring in his mind

I can practically hear his thoughts

"he kissed me back... he wants to talk about the kiss... we went on two dates together at his suggestion... he showed up at my house and charmed my mother... he says I have secret admirers..." cmon sweetie youre so close

"WAIT, DOES HE LIKE ME?" omg honeybun you did it!

or maybe he didn't do it

maybe he was still shuffling the pieces in his brain but hadn't put them together and then his mum said something and distracted him

either way: that was hilarious and I want to high five dunk for his acting there

HIGH EXPECTATIONS, I KNEW IT

still love her tho

high expectations suck but she seems wonderful so far (obviously my opinion will change if the circumstances do (like if it turns out she completely sucks) but for now she's made it to the adoption list)

brb, gonna go cry real quick

well now their thumbs are making out

you see, I understand the things he's saying. and I honestly agree with him. if I were ever somehow put in his position, id probably say the same things.

HOWEVER, I just want my bl boys to kiss again and be happy and together and I appreciate the realism over the usual fantasy kinda situation we go for in bls, but I just want them to kissssss

this is very good advice

I hope that jokezo kiss again this episode

also AAAGBRDHFKBG JENGPOK CRUMBS

YOU'LL NEVER GUESS WHO'S LOSING THEIR MIND OVER JENGPOK AGAIN

BERIUFDJKGBEORPVFD

I LOVE THEM SO MUCH

SHUT UP

SHUT UP SHUT UP

IM NOT CRYING YOU'RE CRYING

FHEWSDGFVESDV

THIS IS TOO FUNNY

im gonna start crying soon

its so funny

help me

girl is worried

I know this is what jeng told you to do but is during debate club really the right moment

im so certain that she ships it

awwhhhhh

HE SAID IT

HE SAID THE THING

AAAAAAAAA

hell yeah

GOUERJLHDGOBIERVLDNF

AAAAAAAAAAA

IM SCREAMING

THATS IT??

THAT'S THE END OF THE EPISODE??

THEY DIDNT EVEN KISS

OR ADDRESS THE FACT THAT - and I can't stress this enough - THEY SLEPT IN THE SAME FREAKING BED AFTER FULL-ASS MAKING OUT

omg next episode is gonna be amazing

I can't wait

gekjrdsbfd I love them so much

im like 70% certain they're gonna kiss next episode so fingers crossed

ALSO NITA DEFINITELY SHIPS IT

anyway. that was good. I should go to sleep now

#quodekash's unhidden agenda to watch hidden agenda #hidden agenda #hidden agenda series #hidden agenda the series #jokezo #zojoke #pokjeng #jengpok #joongdunk #aouboom #aou thanaboon #boom tharatorn #joong archen #dunk natachai

[dethronetheveil]

Like a Villain | Part Three

Pairing: Noah x OC (Christie/Chris)

Warnings: mention of m*rder, cursing, making out, mentions of mental illness, going missing

Synopsis: Part Three- Chris tries to find out if Noah is okay, and it turns out Noah had the same idea. The two spend some more up close and personal time together. That is, until Noah goes ghost.

Word Count: 2.5k

Tag List: @ladyveronikawrites , @catj422 , @asilentsiren [lmk if you wanna be tagged in the next part!]

I sprung up out of bed and allowed my body to carry me to the front door of my apartment. It was as if I were in a dream-like state, because my mind was not processing a single thing that was happening, but my body was carrying me forward. Before I could even slip on shoes, my hand was reaching for the handle of the door, and I was shaken out of my state of comatose, when Noah was standing at my front door, half-dressed and sleepy-eyed. My body seemed to stumble into his arms, as I haphazardly hugged him.

“Oh my God, Noah, I thought it was you. I don’t know why that was my first thought, I was just worried, and I got up the moment I saw the notification, and-” my mouth was racing my brain and unfortunately my brain was losing. That was until Noah wrapped his long arm around my back and began to trace random shapes onto my shirt with his fingers. I could tell he just wanted me to shut up, but he was too nice to say that to my face. His method worked, and I no longer felt like talking. I just wanted to stand here, warmed by his embrace. But, my brain finally caught up to everything, and this caused me to take a step back, disconnecting our bodies.

“Wait, why were you already at my door?”

Noah dropped his arms, almost as if he had been defeated, “I-I came to check on you. I think I had the same thought as you… you can never be too careful.”

“Well, I’m okay. D-did they figure out who was… killed?”

Noah just shook his head and looked down. I could tell that his hands were shaking, and this was the first time I realized these murders must be getting to him just as much as they were getting to me. I gently placed one of my hands on top of his, and his shaking slowed to a stop. He raised his head slightly and just grinned. I knew this was his way of telling me, ‘thank you.’

We stood like this for a few seconds and then Noah pulled his hands away with a short cough, “Um, well, now that I know you’re safe I should probably-” he pointed behind him with his thumb and began to stumble backwards.

“Uh, Noah?”

“Yea?”

“I-I know we haven’t known each other long, and this might come off as a little weird, but, um…” I didn’t know what was about to come out of my mouth. I think my lips just started to move and I didn’t have enough time to stop them, “Um, could you stay with me tonight?”

I placed my hands on my hips, immediately wanting to take back what I had said. What the fuck was I thinking? We had just met and now I probably just freaked him out. I don’t know if I had asked him to stay over because I was genuinely scared of the murders or if I just wanted an excuse to lie with him. Maybe both? But, this was not the time. As I was internally cursing myself out, Noah let out a soft chuckle, “Are you scared of the boogeyman?”

I couldn’t help but blush. I felt like I was back in middle school, flirting with my crush, but this time I was inviting someone in my home to sleep in my bed. It was a little different, I’d say. “Well, if the boogeyman is gonna take me out, then yea, I’m a little paranoid.”

“Damn, I didn’t realize the boogeyman was taking you out too.”

I knew exactly the joke Noah was making, and in the spirit of feeling like I was back in middle school, I playfully hit his arm, but I couldn’t help but laugh, “Yea, seems like you’ve got some competition.”

“Don’t worry, I’m not scared.”

My laughter was still echoing through the courtyard, and I finally took a deep breath to quiet myself. Noah and I stood there just looking at each other for what seemed like forever, before I started rocking back and forth on my heels, “Soo?”

“Oh yea, I forgot. Sure. I’ll stay with you. Wouldn’t want the boogeyman to get you.”

I rolled my eyes at him, but secretly I was gushing inside. It felt like my limbs were on fire, especially when I grabbed his hand in mine and pulled him through my front door into my apartment.

He took a moment to look around, “Ah, so this is what it’s like to come through the front door of this place.”

I laughed. I forgot just a few short hours ago, Noah had snuck through my window and scared the shit out of me, and now I am inviting him into my bed. This seemed like a bad idea, but again, something about him made me trust him. He was a comforting presence to be around, and he seemed like he knew how to cuddle.

I started walking to my room, and he obediently followed. I flipped my light on and sat on the edge of my bed. I watched as he picked up every small trinket I owned and inspected it, like it was some great wonder of the world. He didn’t ask any questions about the items, but maybe he just wanted to speculate and keep whatever ideas he had about them as that. Just speculations. He finally placed the last trinket down on my dresser and took a deep breath. On his release, he took a step towards me and looked right at me.

“So, do you want me to sleep on the floor?”

A wave of disappointment washed through me. Of course he would want to sleep on the floor. It would be weird of him not to ask. We had just met. He probably thought I was crazy. “If you want to,” I tried to answer as enthusiastically as possible, so he couldn’t sense what I was truly feeling.

“D-did you have another idea?”

I could feel my cheeks turning red once again, “No, no. I just-”

“I can sleep in the bed with you. If that’s what you want, Chris.”

Despite my better judgment, I just nodded and patted the mattress next to me, signaling for him to come sit next to me. He knew immediately what I meant and he just smiled and sat next to me. I could tell we were both nervous, even though just hours ago we had kissed for the first time. That didn’t mean we were automatically ready to jump each other’s bones though. Not that I thought that that’s what would happen. Noah was looking down at his lap, and I couldn’t help but look over at the clock on my bedside table. It was already 1am, but it honestly wasn’t as late as I had expected it to be.

“Should we try and get some rest,” I asked.

“Yea, yea. That would probably be good.”

I just nodded and turned my bedside lamp on and stood up to turn the overhead light off. I walked back to the bed and Noah was already under the covers, but because he was so tall, his feet were sticking out of the end of the covers and over the mattress. I couldn’t help but laugh at this image. He was like a giant, but he already agreed to sleep here. I could tell he was rethinking this decision.

“Comfy?” I asked through laughs.

“Oh, I bet you’re loving this.”

“Oh, I very much am. You should see yourself.”

“Oh yea?” He jumped up from the bed and grabbed me at the waist. It all happened in one swift motion and I felt myself gasp as he grabbed me off my feet. I scream-giggled as he gently threw me on the bed. He held himself up over me and I could tell he was breathing hard from all of that commotion.

“Don’t tell me I was that heavy.”

“Oh, shut up, Chris.”

“Hmm, I don't think I wi-”

Before I could finish, Noah’s lips were already pressed against mine. He was still holding himself up over me and I wanted him closer. I wrapped my arms around the back of his neck and pulled him down on top of me. The kisses started slow and methodical and became messier and rougher as time passed. Our lips always found one another, no matter how sloppy our kisses got.

After a few minutes of this, I wrapped my legs around his back. I wanted to feel every inch of him against me. He felt safe and warm. I could tell this drove him crazy, because he disconnected his lips from mine and began placing sloppy kisses against my neck. My breathing became heavier as my hands made their way up into his hair. My fingers nestled in his scalp, and every time his lips touched my skin, my fingers pulled against the strands of his hair. This caused Noah to begin to suck against the skin of my collar bone. I let out soft sighs, causing his lips to explore down the front of my chest, all the way to my torso. My body was on fire, and it felt like there were 1000 bees buzzing beneath my skin. The feeling of exhaustion and arousal mixed together to create a feeling of bliss.

Noah made his way back up to my mouth and continued to kiss me as though he were never going to have the chance to kiss me again. It felt so good to be able to kiss him again. I had been thinking about our kiss since it had ended. I couldn’t stop thinking about his lips against mine. Noah snapped me out of my daze by removing his lips from mine. I couldn’t help but pout a bit. I was thoroughly enjoying myself. Noah just chuckled.

“C’mon, don’t look so sad.”

“Well, you stopped kissing me, so…”

Noah placed a soft kiss against my forehead and smiled, “There you go.”

“Thank you,” I chuckled softly.

“I have wanted to do that since I first saw you,” Noah said.”

“What? Kiss my forehead?”

“No, no. Everything else,” he chuckled and shook his head. He then yawned and looked over at my clock, “But, it is 2:12 in the morning and I did come over so we could sleep, so we should probably do that.”

I sighed with a tinge of annoyance, “Okay, you’re probably right.”

“I always am,” he smiled and wrapped himself in the covers.

“Hey! You can’t take all the covers for yourself,” I laughed.

“Then come and get under them with me.”

“You’re cheeky,” I replied, but got under the covers with him anyway. I curled up against him and already started getting more tired as we lay next to each other.

“Good night, Chris,” he said with a yawn.

I leaned over and turned the lamp off, “Good night, Noah.”

***

I woke up that morning from the sun peaking through the curtains of my room. I rubbed my eyes and felt around my bed, expecting Noah to still be laying there. He was gone. My heart dropped to my stomach. Why did he leave? Did I freak him out? Or was it something worse? I crawled out of bed and paced around my room for a beat to try and calm myself and get my thoughts in order. He probably just had to leave early because he had work or something going on. I made myself believe that was the case, otherwise, I was going to freak myself out too much. And, it wouldn’t hurt to text him and see why he had to leave so early.

I took a deep breath and grabbed my phone from the bedside table. I texted Noah ‘Hey, hope everything’s okay. Why’d you leave so early?’ I hit send and threw my phone onto my bed. I didn’t want to look and see if there would be a notification. Sending texts like that always stressed me out. I always thought they would freak people out. Maybe I was just too in my own head. I picked my phone back up, and there was nothing yet. But, it was still early. I had to give it time. I walked out of my room, phone in hand and started making myself breakfast. Maybe he would reply by the time I was done. I was wrong. He still hadn’t texted back, but it still hadn’t been that long since I had sent the text. I just had to keep going on with my day. Keep myself distracted. I wasn’t going to let this get to me.

After about four hours, Noah still hadn’t texted me back and I was beginning to worry. Maybe I did scare him off. My mind began to wander and overanalyze everything I did in the past day that he could have considered weird or off-putting. My mind decided that it could have been anything I did, and this was driving me crazy. I needed answers, so I decided to text him again. ‘Hey, Noah. Did I do anything?’

I sent this and really did not look at my phone this time. I didn’t look at it until the next morning. Still no reply. Something was seriously wrong. Now I was actually worried.

***

It had been a week and five unread texts later and Noah was still nowhere to be seen, or heard from, or literally anything. It was like the dude had fallen off the edge of the world. But, the murders didn’t stop, and neither did my stress. I thought of him every day. Every time there was a new murder, I was expecting it to be his face that showed up as the next victim. I could not handle this.

I had to sleep alone again, but there wasn’t much sleeping being done. I had called out of work for days at a time, just because my anxiety was so debilitating. This was insane. I had never obsessed over a guy like this. But, it could also be because every day I didn’t know if he was dead or alive.

This continued for days on end, until one day, I was taking a walk around the courtyard and I felt a buzz in my jacket pocket. I didn’t want to get my hopes up, but my first thought was ‘What if this is Noah?’ I decided to let it wait. If it was Noah, he didn’t deserve my immediate reply anyway. And if it wasn’t Noah, then it would just set me off again. I waited a couple of minutes, not noticing that I was walking in a circle around the fountain in the middle of the courtyard, and I finally dug my phone out of my pocket.

The text was from a number I did not recognize, so my heart immediately dropped. It wasn’t Noah. I read the text anyway, because I was already looking at my phone. But, the text was not what I expected. It read, ‘Chris. It’s Noah. Come to my apartment.’

#bad omens #bad omens cult #noah sebastian #bad omens band #noah sebastian fic #like a villain fic

[kydeliusofevirwinter]

been feeling sick recently. anyway headcanon time!

totally not just doing this to avoid my wips

Kyborg (the mighty)

he keeps an author morgan style journal with little doodles and stuff. not saying they’re good but he does it anyway. definitely helped him keep track of everything when he was in the evirwinter woods

chronic pain haver

chronic pain DENIER. will push through it (even if he hurts himself stupidly)

so so painfully stubborn. dude you can take a break no one is gonna judge you homie stop being so tense

i personally hc that elves can choose to sleep or to trance and kyborg exclusively trances so never dreams

if/when he does fully sleep he has very vivid dreams

his hair is super long and he does his best to keep it combed and neat

however sometimes he doesn’t take care of himself and it can easily turn into a greasy rats nest

but most times he just keeps it down or in a half updo

and when he’s extra attentive he decorates it just like he and his family would.

worlds best social cue misser

sooo mentally ill. later on he talks with dr ahem and they develop a friendship. they meet up when not on missions and kinda just talk

this makes dr ahems confession a million times worse btw

professional hater

Mudd

SOOO AUTISTIC

and transmasc

never ever takes off his cape. it’s nice and heavy on his shoulders and back and he likes that

very expressionless and kinda blunt

also misinterprets social cues but instead of spouting nonsense hes confused by other peoples nonsense (does this make sense?)

runs from his problems (literally and metaphorically)

would rather die then ever confront his family ever

he is so neurological disabled to me.

he’s always had memory problems all throughout his life, but shaman seuss definitely messed up his brain worse with those memory rocks

has a hard time telling his fake memories from his real memories

sometimes forgets clay was never real because of his fake memories

chronic headaches. maybe from those enchanted rocks,? they get worse after his arc

his bag is soo full of random cool (non magical) rocks he finds

sometimes super loud (especially when he’s excited) and gets embarrassed about it

he was brought up as a royal and is sometimes too weirdly formal

hates loud sounds so bad. covers / pulls on his ears when it’s too loud

Bart! Bart! Bart!

coolest sideburns in the west

i know his canon design has him barefoot but i reject that. this man wears leather boots

hopeless romantic

soo queer. just in all the ways. pansexual and gender-fluid because he can’t decide for shit

Expert navigator! can get around anywhere

definitely nosy. digs into stuff that is none of his business

drama lover

scarily good with a dagger

also keeps a journal but mostly for doodling cool people he sees when he’s out and about

extremely patient. he’s like a saint

also loyal, especially to gum gum

when he was done sailing on the jebadiah he immediately set out to find gum gum again

he was fiercely protective of gum gum in the orphanage

doenst understand sheet music

but he’s a musical master. he can make up songs anytime with anything

very craft. after all he fashioned himself a little lute and taught himself to sing

tries to be very non judgmental (ahem ahem he’s like the only one who tries to be nice to slique)

for the longest time he thought his parents didn’t care about him but he was ECSTATIC to meat omar and tsimsun

Gum Gum!!!

has a big book of flowers (with pictures!)

knows how to hand sew and patches his own clothes (albeit a little haphazardly)

when he was younger he would genuinely believe anyhting you told him about his parents

that’s why he never looked for his mom because someone told him she died

constantly imagining what his dad could look like

honestly refuses to casually take his hat off

bart has to struggle to get him to take care of his hair because of this

he has super thick hair and hates to get it cut so he has a weird mullet going on

heavy sleeper + snores

sometimes he just likes to sit back when people are talking and listen

sometimes nonverbal

also autistic (perhaps med support needs?)

haates it when he thinks people aren’t taking him seriously

has a gnarly dog bite scar on his arm from when he was younger ( 👀 ! )

wears the same coat and hat all the time

picky eater

bart always helps to accommodate him and is patient when he tries to speak. this means so much to me btw. they are literally brothers

talks in a like funny way. idk how to explain this he just does this in canon.

sometimes repeats the words he hears

i forget what this is called

i have a fever as i’m typing this so i hope it’s comprehensive. OK BYE

#stinky dragon pod #tales from the stinky dragon #kyborg #mudd bramblecrack #kyborg the mighty #bart finn #gum gum #headcanon #i m SO SICK #i may be projecting #maybe #you’ll never know #this is so cringe #but whatever

[chaotic-on-main]

Who Could Leave Me? | ModernAU One-Shot

☾ Pairings ➼ Levi Ackerman x gn!Reader

☾ Content/Warnings ➼ angst, death, funeral, depression, if you squint really hard there's comfort? but mainly all hurt, alcohol mentions

☾ Author's note ➼ I'm actively going through my abandonment triggers and what better way to explore my emotions than to write about it. Betrayal, being left behind. They're the same thing to my ill brain. Anyways, I'm so sorry for the hurt I'm about to spring on y'all but I hope you'll forgive me. Now, back to my summer commissions and UW!

☾ Word Count ➼ ~2.5k

☾ Songs I listened to while writing:

Betrayal was nothing new to you. Being left behind was just the same. But when you’re left behind and betrayed at the same time, that’s a whole new feeling. Especially when it came from someone you trusted.

But it wasn’t your fault, was it?

Your name floats by in a whisper, a voice you know all too well.

You wake up with a start and a pounding headache. The autumnal sunrise filters through your sheer curtains in light blue hues, illuminating the room enough to see the outlines of the mess around you. You’re on your stomach, face half buried in a pillow with your arm splayed out on the other side of the bed. Your fingers curl up in the empty space.

Oh, yeah.

Maybe if you go back to sleep, you’ll wake up and everything will make sense again, you tell yourself.

What a stupid thought, you tell yourself.

Rolling onto your back, you stare up at the dark ceiling. It didn’t matter how much you tried to slow time down, today came anyway. You weren’t ready. So, you stay in bed until the blue turns into oranges and finally yellows.

What time was it anyways? Then again, why did it matter? You didn’t care.

“Love?” You hear whispered from the other side of your door. It’s Hange, a mutual friend you met a while back. They stayed over last night no doubt to make sure you didn’t drink yourself into oblivion. It didn’t work, but you vaguely remember them checking in on you every hour, so you imagine that was enough for them.

They knock softly against the wood.

“I’m going to step out to get some preparations ready. I’ll be back in a couple hours to pick you up. Try to be ready by then, okay?” You turn your head at their voice and spot their shadow in the slit of the door. After a minute of silence from you, the shadow slips away. The sound of the front door closing reverberates through the house and then it’s silent again.

The hours that proceeded were spent in a catatonic state. Your wide eyes stayed glued to the ceiling, not a single thought floating by. You suppose that wasn’t a bad thing. You’re not sure how long it had been, but another soft knock echoes through your room eventually.

“You’re still in bed, aren’t you?” It’s Hange again. They sound tired. “I’m coming in.”

You roll on your side so you’re facing your friend as they step into your room with a squeak of the door. An onyx pantsuit drapes over Hange’s tall frame, their rectangular spectacles glinting off the only source of light in the room – the afternoon sun.

 “I knew you’d have trouble getting up.” They make their way over to you. Grabbing your blankets, they pull it all the back so that you’re exposed to the chill in the room. It makes you groan in displeasure, but you let it happen anyways.

They pull you out of bed with a ‘hup!’ and lead you into the connected bathroom, you follow with shuffling feet. Despite the sun being out and being under baggy long sleeves, the air is still cold so goosebumps pop up everywhere along your arms and legs.

They release your arm, leaving you in the middle of the bathroom as they zoom around you. The bath faucet is on in mere seconds and as the tub fills, they grab a few towels from the linen closet.

It’s weird because you watch all of this happening but for some reason, none of it is comprehending in your brain. It’s all a blur as they strip you down, lead you to the bath, and help you in. Before you know it, you’re half sunken and leaning all the way back, only your nose and up sits above the steamy water.

“You know, Levi had to help me with this in college, too.” Hange whispers behind you as they massage shampoo into your hair. It smells like roses. You hum back softly, not really sure how to respond.

Levi’s name doesn’t hurt you as much as you thought it would, but you’re not certain if that’s a good or bad thing. Everything feels numb, even the hot water that felt like it should be stinging against your skin.

“It kind of feels like the passing of torches, you know?” They chuckle quietly at the nostalgia.

The rest of the bath passes by. Rinsing off when asked, getting out when told, holding still when Hange dried you gently with a towel. Staying when Hange tells you to wait as they go grab the clothes that they had set out for you to wear today. You were a robot awaiting orders and nothing else.

Hange adorns your body with a simple long sleeve black dress. It goes down to your knees and the rest is covered by fleece leggings and warm socks. Eventually, they drag you out to the bedroom and sit you down while they lace up your boots. This is all done in silence, though you don’t miss the looks Hange gives you.

They’re the same looks that everyone has given you since the incident. Like you’re fragile and ready to break at any time. Though, you guess you can’t fault them for that. Your actions the last few weeks haven’t told otherwise.

“Hey,” Hange whispers down to you, and you shift your gaze up to their light brown eyes, full of sadness. “Did you…?” They hold out a ring to you.

It’s simple. Silver, studded with a handful of diamonds. You can’t see it, but engraved on the inside is the word ‘yours’ in Levi’s neat handwriting. A wedding band.

You reach out hesitantly, hand shaking as you take it as if you were afraid it might crumble on contact. With those same shaky fingers, you slip it on your left ring finger. It had been a bit since you last wore it, but like a bike you find familiarity with it again. Only this time, it feels heavier than ever.

“Are you ready to go?” Hange holds their hand out to you with a small smile.

.

It starts raining as soon as you both leave the house, heavy clouds eclipsing the sun for the rest of the day. Perfect for a funeral.

Outside of the warm tent, gentle but cold raindrops splash on the trees above and trickle down to the white plastic and onto the muddy ground. With the overcast of stormy clouds, the day is cold. It’s almost fitting, like a movie you’ve seen a million times. And you were the main character. It would make you laugh if you weren’t so drained.

As they call your name to wrap the service up with a eulogy, you feel your heartbeat quicken. You had requested to have it last as it was a job put on you and you wanted to push it off as much as possible. But your pulse racing isn’t from nerves, it’s from anger. Sadness. Frustration. Like a fissure in a dam, realization comes to you.

You can’t do this. How could he do this to you?

Your feet are running before you know it. Out the tent and up the hill into the enclosure of the forest that lines the cemetery. You don’t stop until you feel someone grabbing your wrist tightly and holding you back. It’s a strong grip from a warm hand.

“Le-?” You turn around and almost slip on the leaf littered floor.

Standing in front of you is a man about a foot taller, blond undercut and misty blue eyes that stare hard at you. Erwin Smith, Levi’s closest friend – Levi would always deny being called best friends, something you always teased him with.

“You can’t keep hiding and running from the truth.” He says gently. Downturned eyes and a frown to match, he gives you the same look everyone else is giving.

“Stop looking at me like that.” These are the first words you’ve said aloud in a few weeks. Your voice comes out scratchy and it hurts.

“Like what?”

“Like I’m just going to break down at a drop of a hat.”

“Maybe you need to. Have you even cried yet?”

“I don’t want to cry.”

“Maybe you should.”

You narrow your eyes at him. You haven’t seen him in about a month, but he was always a good confidant so to say that your high walls weren’t about to crumble down would be a lie. That fissure is growing with every second he stares at you.

“Erwin, why are you here?”

“I’m here to celebrate the life of my friend, same as everyone else. We’re all upset, too. We need you just as much as you need us.” His grip tightens on you. The rain is coming down harder and you start feeling the cold seep through your clothes and into your bones. You notice Erwin’s usual combed back hair is now in his face, dripping water into his eyes.  

There’s silence as you try to figure out what to say. That was the problem, wasn’t it? Your eulogy sits half finished on your dresser because you had no idea what to say.

What was even appropriate for others to hear? What would be selfish and what wouldn’t be? You suppose it’s all considerably selfish. The one who could call you out on your shit effectively isn’t here.

A low roll of thunder rumbles from above as you face off with him.

“There’s nothing to celebrate.” You mumble.

“You don’t me-“

“He’s not here, Erwin! He left me!” You feel your voice rising with every syllable. He opens his mouth to say something else but now that you’ve found your voice, you can’t stop the word vomit.

“He chose to go back into that building because of who he is. And I hate him for it! How could he do that to me?? Didn’t he think about me?” A sob racks in your chest, and it takes a moment to catch your breath so as to not choke. The water streaming down your face turns warm and you can practically taste the salt of your more-than-late tears as you continue on.

“What it would mean for him leaving me? Nothing feels right anymore, nothing feels like home because he was my home. He promised he’d be around for as long as I wanted him. But I still want him!” Erwin pulls you into his chest and holds you close as you start sobbing harder. They rip out of your throat just like the words you shout, voice becoming hoarse with every line. You don’t fight his vice grip. But you don’t stop either.

“I said I would always follow his lead. But why did he have to go somewhere where I can’t follow. He left me behind. He said he never would and he did it anyway. I hate him so much. I hate him for making me love him and then leaving me like this. I didn’t even get to say goodbye.” You trail off, losing yourself in the cries of your pain. Everything hurts as you shake - the only thing holding you together is Erwin’s tight embrace.

The rain pours around you two as you continue to weep into Erwin’s drenched suit. He doesn’t say anything, only placing his hand on top of your head and holding you closer.  

“I don’t know what I could say to help, truthfully. But I know that Levi wouldn’t ever want you to feel this way.” He says finally, his voice rumbling deep in his chest. “Terrible things happen, and they can’t be explained. But it’s no one’s fault, not even his. It’s easy to point the blame, but sometimes there isn't anything to blame.”

“That’s not good enough, Erwin.” You mutter in between hitched breaths.

“I know, especially not now. But it will get easier. You need to be more patient with yourself. And be kind.” He whispers down to you, a hand rubbing up and down your back as he talks.

Erwin stays with you until you can breathe again. He offered to take over the eulogy for you, which you gladly accepted. You didn’t even show up to the rest of the funeral, instead opting to sit in Hange’s car until they came for you and drove you home in silence.

.

A few weeks had passed since Levi’s service. At Erwin’s request, you had been more patient with yourself in that time. Of course, none of it was easier - but you weren’t running anymore. With shaky resolve, you were able to bring yourself down to the cemetery.

You twist your wedding band in between two fingers as you walk down the path to where your late husband rests. Your heart feels like it’s about to explode in anticipation. You hadn’t seen the tombstone that Hange helped pick out, so when your eyes finally fall on it, it’s enough to make you stop in your tracks.

Levi Ackerman

Dec. 25th 1983 – Oct. 17th 2023

“The only thing we’re allowed to do is believe that we won’t regret the choice we made.”

He often said to live your life with no regrets. The thing that has been gnawing at you finally comes to you in a new light. Levi wasn’t the type to do anything without thinking. He knew the risks, and you knew the risks of loving him.

Your feet stumble over the soft grass, and you lean down to place a small bouquet of flowers onto the fresh dirt. There’s a layer of permafrost from this morning, just barely starting to melt. Today is warm with the sun out, but that doesn’t stop the fog of breath that comes out with every spoken word.

“I’m sorry for everything I said, Levi. I’m not mad anymore. I just miss you so much.” You sit yourself down carefully, facing the tombstone.

There’s no answer, of course. The only thing you hear is the whistling of the cold wind blowing through the almost empty trees that came with this time of year. You tuck your chin into the scarf wrapped around your neck. It still smells like Levi – clean laundry and pine.

“I don’t want to be here if you’re not. I see you everywhere.” Your words start to choke again. The day of the funeral made that dam within you break open and since then, you find yourself to be more vulnerable. More fragile, like everyone expected. “And I can’t pretend that it’s okay when it’s not. But I’ll try for you, because I know that’s what you’d want.” You whisper, silent tears streaking down your face into the scarf as you shudder.

“I love you. And I will see you again.”

-> Taglist: @humanitys-strongest-bamf @sckerman @nube55 @notgoodforlife @kingkonoha @missyasma @highgoon69 @elsasarahi @kamyru @eriellaa @genyastolemyheart @jadam724 @sujiroses @levisversion @apolloshaiku @secretmoneybearvoid @romantichomicide95 @elnyrae @dkbktk420 @icansmellsouls @levis-squishy-cheeks @missamity @roseofdarknessblog @youre-ackermine @averysmolbear

If you'd like to join my taglist, please go here! (also if you had multichapter fics marked or would be interested in my JJK content, please go back into your answers and recheck them! I fucked up and didn't realize if I changed the answers, it would uncheck things lmao oops)

#i'm sorry y'all #levi ackerman #attack on titan #levi ackerman x reader #levi x reader #angst #hurt no comfort #hurt/no comfort #cw death #cw alcohol #aot #shingeki no kyojin #snk #x reader

[cheemers-writing-archive]

I'm Glad You're Safe (Jotaro x Reader)

You groaned, your eyes peeping open. There was a loud clang coming from a pan right in front of you, and a thin silhouette holding the pan. “Wake up, everyone,” Kakyoin said. “I made breakfast. Eat it while it’s still hot.”

“You really didn’t have to wake us up like that, Kakyoin,” Jotaro grunted. “There are much quieter ways to do it.”

“You two wouldn’t have woken up if I was quiet about it,” Kakyoin chuckled. “Come on, don’t let it cool down, now.”

You rolled to your side, preparing to step out of your cushiony shell. That’s when you noticed Jotaro laying right beside you, facing away.

“You weren’t that close to me when we fell asleep,” you murmured.

“Well, it got cold,” Jotaro murmured back. “What else was I supposed to do?”

Jotaro was right. You couldn’t quite pin it down, but you knew for a fact it was cold. After all, in your dream, you…

What happened in your dream last night?

You paused for a few moments, trying to rack your brain of any memory of a dream. Nothing came to mind. Usually, that shouldn’t be a bad thing, but for some reason all sorts of alarms were going off in your head.

You kept thinking and trying to remember, lost in your own head, until a large, sturdy hand fell upon your shoulder. You suddenly snapped out of your thoughts and looked at the hand. It was Jotaro’s, for sure.

“Hey,” Jotaro said, “don’t think so hard early in the morning. It’s not good for you.”

You gave a slight nod while gazing into his eyes. It was always hard to tell what exactly Jotaro thought, or why he did things, but his eyes did give a few things away. Right now, his eyes were softer than usual. His advice to you was not in ill will, or he would have had a harsher look to them.

“This might be a strange question, but did you have a bad dream last night, too?” Jotaro asked. “You looked like you were trying to remember something, and I can’t remember my dream last night, either.”

“Yeah, actually,” you murmured. “I don’t know why, but it feels like that dream was special, or important. It’s as if forgetting that dream will lead to something bad happening.”

“Well, unless you suddenly became an oracle, I wouldn’t worry about it.” Jotaro sat up and unzipped himself from the sleeping bag. “And even if something bad happens, we can take care of it, right?”

You couldn’t help but smile a bit. “I guess so,” you said. “But I’m still worried about why we both had nightmares we can’t remember. Kakyoin and Polnareff had the same thing just yesterday.”

Now, it seemed like Jotaro was actually concerned about something. “You know, actually, speaking of Kakyoin, didn’t it seem like he was normal this morning? Last night he was basically going insane. Has… has anyone seen the baby?”

“You mean this cute little thing?” Kakyoin said as he walked past the two of you. In his hands was the small child that the group boarded the plane with. “He’s doing just fine. I was just about to go feed him.”

“You’re okay, Kakyoin?” you asked. “Last night you were going on about how the baby was a Stand user and everything.”

“Everything’s fine now,” Kakyoin chuckled. “You all were right. I just needed a good night’s sleep.”

Jotaro gave Kakyoin a side-eye, but quickly hid his eyes behind his hat. “Whatever. So long as you don’t try to kill the baby again.”

As Kakyoin left again, Jotaro looked back at you. “Look, I know that apart from the crash, nothing too bad has happened, but I just want to say… I’m glad you’re safe.” He turned his face away after that last sentence.

You turned away as well, to hide your blush. “I’m glad you’re safe, too,” you told him.

“Hey, aren’t you two going to eat breakfast?” Joseph asked. “We need to leave as soon as possible!”

“Coming!” you shouted, then beckoned for Jotaro to follow you. “Let’s go, before the food gets cold.”

Jotaro nodded his head, walking by your side.Once this whole trip is over, maybe I’ll ask him out, you thought to yourself. For now, I’ll just make sure he stays safe.

#jotaro x reader #jjba x reader #jotaro kujo x reader

[devildom-moss]

Since you menioned Simeon and Barbatos in the same sentence, its my time to rant about how much i love Simbarb!!

I AM LITERALLY ON MY KNEES FOR THAT SHIP. EVERY SCRAP OF SIMBARB CONTENT I CAN FIND, I WILL DEVOUR IT LIKE THERES NO TOMORROW. DOESNT MATTER IF ITS FLUFF, ANGST, OR HECK EVEN SMUT. I LIVE FOR SIMBARB. THERES NOTHING ELSE THAT WILL SATISFY ME MORE THAN SIMBARB. LIKE THE SHIP IS JUST PERFECT IN EVERY WAY POSSIBLE. AND BOTH BARBATOS AND SIMEON ARE PERFECT AS WELL. I WANT TO LIKE, SQUEEZE THE LIFE OUT OF THE TWO OF THEM, AFFECTIONATELY.

I think i went a little off course.. oh and i read this simbarb fanfiction once and now ive created a whole au with lore and backstory with Simeon and someone else (which can technically be MC but the actual MC also exists in this au). And i really wanna talk about it to someone, but there's no one who wants to listen, but you're now back, and im happy so maybe ill talk about it to you if youre interested!

Anyways have a nice day! Remember to eat, sleep and dont do drugs <33

Sincerely, 💜

You are so right for this. Those two are not only my favorites, but they are probably my favorite ship (I don't know if I've made that clear in my writing, but I feel like there have at least been hints). We are on the same boat here (I apologize for the pun, but I'm sending it out into the world anyway). I am right there with you. They are precious individually and together. I generally am not a touchy/hugging person, so I wouldn't want to squeeze them, but I would make them a delicious bowl of soup, give them pats on the head, and tell them that they're both good boys.

Especially as a fellow SimBarb lover, you are welcome talk about your AU here! Also, in general, I love reading about how people view character relationships (romantic, platonic - in any form, really).

While I'm here, I would like to fuel the SimBarb love with a few thoughts of my own it won't be too much because I'm going to head to bed soon, so my brain is in wind down mode.

Okay, so I lied to myself about the "a few" and rambled for 10 bullet points, so more under the cut:

Canonically, Barbatos and Simeon just often find themselves on outings together. Barbatos phrases it like it's unintentional; it just happens; they just have accidental dates. Well, considering that Barbatos seems to always have good luck, maybe there's a reason he keeps finding himself on outings with Simeon. Wouldn't it be lucky if he happened to run into a certain handsome angel while he was out?

I think it took Simeon longer to realize he liked being around Barbatos than it took Barbatos to notice how much he enjoyed spending time with Simeon. Simeon probably used Luke as a kind of affection proxy for a long time. A lot of "Luke really likes Barbatos," and "Barbatos is so sweet to Luke. It really warms my heart." Really? Is it just Luke who likes Barbatos?

They probably pick up groceries a lot together, and they both like to menu plan as they browse the markets, so they end up taking ideas from each other. Sometimes they'll plan to cook the same dish on the same night. It makes them kind of giddy. Even though they don't share meals often, when they cook the same thing on the same night, it almost feels like they're getting to eat together.

Whenever Luke goes to Barbatos for cooking/baking lessons, Barbatos tries to ensure they have leftovers for Luke to take back to Simeon. Additionally, Barbatos is especially motivated to help the final product turn out good (outside of just wanting Luke to learn and succeed) because he knows it's a reflection of his own skills and he wants to impress Simeon.

Also, I could see Barbatos sending Luke back home with two bouquets of flowers (especially edible flowers and sometimes herbs) from his garden. One is for Luke, but the other one, Barbatos will casually suggest that Luke "give it to Simeon, if you'd like."

These two both love taking care of others. Can you imagine how often they just try to out-spoil the other? I think it would occasionally end up in arguments that are basically just "sit down, and let me take care of you for a change."

Barbatos would be the least comfortable being taken care of because he's a demon. Being doted on by an angel. That's weird, right? He feels incredibly unworthy.

These two could flirt back and forth so well.

Barbatos would get extremely flustered if Diavolo commented on how wonderful it is to see a respectable demon such as Barbatos and a regarded angel like Simeon getting along so well, and that it gives him hope for the future between the Devildom and the Celestial Realm.

This is kind of angsty, and I don't remember if Barbatos and Simeon actually met before the war, but I have this thought (maybe a future story idea if I decide to lean into ships or something) that while Diavolo was enamored with Lucifer, Barbatos took a liking to Simeon. Actually, it was initially just an interest in the angel whose cooking skills could almost compare with his own. Then he realized how similar they were and how well they would get along. I just imagine younger Barbatos thinking hoping that when the war came around, Simeon would fall with Lucifer. Selfishly, he wanted the opportunity to even just be around Simeon. When that didn't happen, Barbatos was silently crushed but he carried on. He held his excitement the entire time when he first heard that Simeon would be one of the exchange students, and he was even more delighted when Simeon treated him with kindness.

#💜 anon #ask #replies #barbatos #simeon #anon #obey me #obey me barbatos #obey me simeon #what? I'm posting just ship content? unheard of.

[traumacat800]

Every Kiss Begins With Kill Chapter 2 (NSFW)

Buckets of Bug Blood

OK OK BECAUSE OF YOU THE TIMELINE CHANGED BASICALLY. So, Bob never sees Lila and survives. He still eats ppl though, but the VAMPIRE GUY SURVIVES HE'S SO CUTE (/platonic) I'M SAD HE DIED 💔

my mutuals have been BEGGING on their KNEES for chapter 2 soooo here it is fr <3

Also Brazen (your dog) is really fucking smart, tbh everybody needs a Brazen. SHE LITERALLY CAN ONLY BARK LMFAOO 😭😭 and she’s STILL the voice of reason. LMAO rather the BARK of reason. The entire thing is so goofy to the point where it’s amazing and fits perfectly in the series fr

There’s smut in this chapter. But the midst of it will be in the third chapter or fourth. Reader is 18 btw, senior in hs. <3

TW:

Breaking in (although it isn’t treated as such) , mentions of bugs (you like bugs sm), Bob Velseb.

•

It was the day after Halloween.

You were sitting at home, Brazen was laying on the bed next to you. She’s completely recovered from her illness and was back to being her usual self. You ran your finger through her soft hair, god, you loved your dog so much. Brazen perked up at something but you didn’t notice. You were on ibisPaint at the moment, although you keep switching off if it to either change the music or go on TimeWatch (Tiktok) or SOMEHOW study for a test that you never remembered having. Your brain worked in weird ways, you supposed. Your headphones were one of your most prized possessions, at the moment, they weren’t helping you. 

At least that’s what Brazen thought, as she barked at the tall man with horns that was creeping in the backyard. You had told her about meeting a man with the description before. Unlike Brazen, you didn’t sleep downstairs. Which meant that you never had to sleep next to the loud ass Tv, that somehow only played the news. Brazen hated your ignorance about the subject or rather the fact that you thought a murderer was hot. Now that murderer was back, probably to end you. 

‘I don’t get paid enough for this, I don’t even get paid at all!’ Brazen thought. 

Brazen continued to bark at the man but he never hesitated in his attempt to get to you, somehow making his way up to your window. Brazen jumped down from the window, and ran to your bed. You still couldn’t hear her barking over your loud ass music. Brazen rolled her eyes before nipping at you. You jumped a bit, taking out your headphones. Brazen looked back, the window was open, the man was inside. 

“Did you know that Endocannibalism is just one of many forms of cannibalism?”

You jumped at his voice, one you were definitely not expecting. You turned around. It was the guy from yesterday, he was still in his costume. 

“Dude, where are you finding these weird facts? Also how the fuck did you get in my room?” 

He pointed at the window, his smile never faltered. You felt a bit concerned for him, did he have nowhere to sleep or maybe he had no friends? You frowned at that thought, even though he technically broke into your house. He was a little weird but so were you. I mean you liked bugs, your shelfs were littered with bug books. Plus, he didn’t seem to have any bad intentions. So, you shrugged it off, as usual.

“Hey what’s your name? Never got it yesterday.”

He hummed, thinking for a couple seconds.

“Bob” 

Brazen looked between the two of you, absolutely horrified at that sight. There’s no way you actually liked the murderer right? 

“I’m Y/n” 

You closed your window before looking back at him. 

“You know, you could’ve just knocked on the door. I would’ve let you in” 

Brazen huffed out a loud growl before leaving the room, probably going back downstairs. You closed the door behind her.

“Wanna play a game?” You asked, pointing to your video game console, he didn’t respond. So you went over to it, plugging in the second controller. He watched you curiously as you did so. Once you’d finally finished hooking up the game, you patted the spot next to you. His heavy footsteps filled the room as you sat waiting for him. He sat down, picking up the controller. You smiled at him, and you both played what was a very nice and gentle game of online Monopoly. 

Spoiler alert: 

It was not a very nice game, it was every man for themselves. 

•

Bob laughed as he defeated you, you’d landed on a house of his. It was 1500 dollars to pay off the fine, you’d only had 900 at the moment. There was no way he would trade you for his money. You whined in defeat. You had to go bankrupt, there was no other option. Bob smirked at you, you refused to look at him especially after all the shit you talked to him.

“Oh don't be like that” He purred

You refused to acknowledge how his dark voice made your stomach pool in anticipation. 

But little did you know, he saw right past you. 

Bob grabbed your hips, a bit questionably, only to see if you were truly comfortable with this or not. You didn’t shift, so he rested his head on you. You could feel his warm breath on your cheek, you felt your face heat up. He studied your body language a bit before finally asking—

“Can I touch you?”

You nodded. You were at a loss for words at the situation that was happening. It seemed straight out of wattpad, that you’d meet a guy you’d like and end up doing the dirty tango with him a day after. His hands trailed down your hips. Your breath hitched as he quietly studied you once more, slipping his hands into your undergarments. He removed one hand, spitting on it. For lube purposes since you had none. He slowly inserted his fingers inside you, it was uncomfortable. The pain was a sharp burn. Thankfully, he focused on the other elements of your body to keep your content. For example, biting your neck, rubbing around your nipples, and finally grinding against your leg. He was so hard and it was making you feel even more pleasure at the thought of taking him: It didn’t take very long for him to break you in. You managed to stifle a moan at how good his hands were, moving inside you slowly. He seemed like an expert on this topic. His head was resting near your neck, he took in all your sinful sounds. You pushed back against him, begging the man for more. 

“Needy Kitten.” He breathed out, you whined at the sensual tone of his voice. 

He started to pump his fingers in and out of you, setting a rather fast pace. Your hole twitched around him.You felt your stomach pool with pleasure, you closed your eyes. Clenching up your body as your orgasm struck through you like thunder. You stopped for a moment catching your breath. Bob was still hard, you notice. Although he seemed to be happy with how you looked now. Removing his hands from your undergarments. 

“Wait…” 

You figured it'd be easier if he just dry humped you, it’s not like you were ready for the real thing yet. You sat on his lap, your hole brushing up against his cock roughly. Bob moaned against you, grabbing your hips. He pushed you closer to him, taking full advantage of the body that you’d lended to him. His arms wrapped around you, as he grinded roughly against your ass. His heavy grunts and breaths made you moan and whine. He didn’t last very long though, cumming in his pants. Bob panted along with you. You fought the need to sleep, you didn’t want him to leave just yet. Bob seemed to notice this. You shifted the position, burying your face in his soft red sweater. His arms came to pull you closer, his head rested on yours. You could hear his heartbeat, it was fast. 

“Sleep now. I’ll be back soon.” 

You couldn’t help but follow his instructions. 

Bob stayed with you until it started to get light outside, tucking you into bed. While waking back to your window, he noticed the set of books you had. Most being about bugs. He took one from your bookshelf. 

•

The next day, you awoke to Brazen nipping at you. It was around noon. She was barking at something. Brazen had been barking a lot more lately, usually she never did. You yawned, your vision steadied after a while. That’s when you noticed a note and a bucket next to your window. You picked up the note as you peered into the bucket with a mysterious substance.

“Did you know that bugs have different types of blood? Some can be colorful and others dull. I killed every bug I saw to make this for you” 

-

Bob

You smiled at the genuine dedication. You face flushed at the thought of last night.

Brazen continued to glare at the bucket. 

—-

Bonus art of the goofy goober

SHES SO OFFENDED

#Brazen (your dog) #Every Kiss Begins With Kill #bob velseb x reader #bob velseb is hot #spooky month 5 #spooky month #bob velseb #bob spooky month #spooky month bob #yandere bob velseb #yandere bob x reader #bugs are actually so cool #just not when they’re near me 😎 #♡ #the silly #The goofy goober #monopoly but not used correctly #next thing you know they’ll be playing uno #can you even play Uno with too people? #Let’s find out

[grippingbeskar]

salt, ice and fire | frank castle

chapter eight - learning the basics

[series masterlist] [previous chapter]

word count: 5.6k

warnings: canon typical violence, description of blood, death, torture, injuries/cuts/, mentions of mental illness and suicidal thoughts, graphic description of violence and fighting it’s the PUNISHER PEOPLE we be killing left right and mf centre.

a/n: okay first thx for all the sweetness on this series. i am having such a good time writing it and i’m glad someone’s reading it!’ these next few chapters might take a little longer to upload but i will try my best!!! enjoy okay bye!

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

“Hey.” A gentle voice streams through your sleep addled brain, and you feel the warmth of a hand over your own. Skin, touching your skin. You almost don’t move, just to keep the sensation. “Wake up.”

The hand leaves you, and your eyes open to darkness. After blinking a few times, your eyes adjust to the tinted film of the sunglasses, and you sit up in the car seat, sliding the sunnies on top of your head. Looking out the windscreen, you don’t recognise where you are. A whole lot of old style buildings like the street, as well as a few small houses in a shared drive way and a motel with a diner attached to the side.

“Where are we?”

“Just outside the city. Figured we’d stop. Eat some real food.” Your stomach grumbled at the thought, the only thing in your system from the past few days being chips and half a sandwich. “Get a hotel room. Madani should call soon, after the reports of the last of the Colonel’s hits go through.”

You don’t miss how he says the Colonel’s hits. Not yours.

“Where’d you get the money for all this stuff?” You ask Frank who nearly disappears in the darkness, the sun setting a lot quicker than you thought. He moves around your side of the car before answering.

“Military pay is good. Plus Madani pays me off for some jobs when I’m around. It’s enough.”

“So I wasn’t entirely wrong when I said you worked for her?”

“Alright, smart ass.” He walks past you, heading straight up to the flashing red and blue signs of the diner.

Once you both slid into a booth, a nice lady hands you a menu, and lingers on the sight of Frank.

“It’s been a while.” She says, smiling fondly at him.

“Don’t get out here as much as I used to. Couldn’t miss a chance for that bacon you got, though.” She ruffled his hair like a kid, and you wanted to hide your face when she turned her attention to you.

“You’ve finally brought a girl around! Good for you. You want the same as him, sweet thing?” It took you a second to realise she was actually talking to you. She was being kind, she called you sweet. Blinking up at her, you nodded, a small please managing to squeak from your mouth as she took the menu. “Hope he’s treating a pretty thing like you right. I know Pete seems rough round the edges, but he’s a real softie when you get to know him.”

“I don’t doubt it.” You feel a little more comfortable as she grabs your hand and squeezes it, before disappearing behind the counter. “Pete?”

“Better than Frank.” His expression is unreadable, his eyes busy staring somewhere behind you.

“Hm. Well let’s hope Pete has better taste in cars than I do. I’m getting tired of driving around in that thing.” You can still see the car out side, looking like it’s one day away from spontaneously combusting.

“My van might still be around. We can do a drive by when Madani gives us a direction.” You drop your chin in your hands, staring at him. Something about the way he’s looking back at you makes you want to know what’s going on in that giant head of his, pretty as it is to look at.

“Alright. I have to ask. What’s with the skull?”

“Huh?”

“On your vest. The skull.”

“What? You don’t like it?” The lady brings your food over, sliding two plates of bacon and eggs in front of you. Despite it nearly being 7pm, you have never wanted breakfast so bad.

“I didn’t say that. Maybe a bit cheesy, but why that?”

“It’s bad-ass.” You drop the bacon on your fork, sudden laughter taking over at his stupid comment.

“Seriously!” You say between breaths, and he was fighting his own smile as he replied.

“Mostly for targets. If I come out at people in the dark, they see the white skull and it’s practically a bullseye.”

“So, you want them to shoot you?”

“They’re gonna shoot me anyways. Better they hit my vest than my head.” You nod, stuffing your face full of food. “Slow down. You’ll choke.”

“God-“ You ignore him, shoving another mouthful of food in. “-I haven’t had a real, hot meal in… fucking years. This is incredible.”

“You didn’t eat? Down there?” This food is so damn good, you hardly realise he’s prying.

“Not like this. All frozen shit. Pretty sure the dogs ate better than I did. This, though. Tastes like heaven.” He nods, watching you as he eats.

Apart from the occasional quip at each other’s eating habits, you scarf down the rest of the food without another word. Your body almost immediately digests it, already feeling ten times stronger just from the one meal. When the lady from before comes back to take your plates, she laughs down at the two of you.

“Like peas in a goddamn pod, you two are! Just the sweetest couple.” She begins to stack your plates, and both you and Frank talk at the same time.

“Oh, we aren’t-“

“She isn’t my-“

“Oh, haven’t had that conversation yet? Petey, you better stop playing around. Hard to find a good woman at all, let alone one who looks this cute.” You find yourself heating up, not so much at the woman’s compliment, but at the way Frank looks at you after she says it.

He squints, his head tilting just slightly, as if he’s considering it. Like he’s only just noticed that you were in fact, a woman, and what that might look like to someone else. You want to sink into the chair, and your grateful when Frank takes his eyes off you to get up and pay.

You head out into the cool of the night, standing near the parked car. Frank comes out not a minute later, and you hardly get a second to recover before he’s right next to you, leaning over to pop the boot. The boot full of weapons and clothes. He grabs one bag, presumably not full of guns because of how small it looked compared to the others, but not before he straps himself with a hand gun, and shoved one towards you.

“I don’t need it.” You say, trying to shove it away, but he resists.

“Didn’t ask that. If you’re staying with me for now, you’ll have one on you. Always.”

“You said it yourself, I don’t even know how to use it. Besides, I seem to remember I got yours off you fairly quick last time. If the moment comes, I’ll just-“

“I don’t take chances, and I don’t do ifs. You stay? Means you take this, and you keep it on you. I’ll teach you the basics.” He starts walking towards the staircase leading up to the rooms of the hotel, and you’re left standing there with a hand gun in your palms, shuffling after him.

You weren’t particularly against guns. You had seen enough of what they could do, pretty much a less violent version of what you can do. You just never needed them, never wanted to take a life with one. You figured if you had chased them down, tortured them, you at least owed it to them to look them in the eye and kill them with your hands.

Also, no one had ever bothered to teach you. And now Frank was offering, so flippantly, like the offer didn’t mean anything to him. If anything, it was an inconvenience for you not to know, or maybe he just wanted to make sure he always had a back up gun when you were around. Either way, here you were, fumbling with the barrel of it, trying to make sure you didn’t accidentally set it off.

As you turned into the room, you were so distracted you hardly noticed the layout. Frank went straight into the bathroom, though, and when you looked up, you saw there was only one bed. Sure, there was a tiny couch in the corner and a chair at the desk, but the double bed was the only other piece of furniture in the room.

“Only room left.” Frank comes out of the bathroom, chucking the bags on the couch, reading your expression clearly. “There’s some clothes in there that should fit. There’s a shop downstairs, too. If you need anything else.”

“Ah.” You look through the bag, seeing shirts, jeans and jumpers that look about your size, or close enough that it wouldn’t matter, but it was missing some pretty important pieces. He just nods to his wallet on the couch, and goes back into the bathroom, locking the door and starting the shower.

Part of you was embarrassed about the idea of having to go downstairs and buy underwear, but most of you was a weird kind of sated that Frank didn’t have a bunch of woman’s underwear lying around for rotation. That like of thinking only dragged you down a mental rabbit hole. Did he do that? Was he turning down women left and right because he was stuck with you? You couldn’t deny he was attractive, and with that smile…

Fuck. You need to focus. Walking out of the room, you gripped the wallet right and headed to the store downstairs. You’d never bought your own clothes, let alone underwear. You weren’t even sure you knew what size you were in them.

The experience was uneventful, and certainly not a fulfilling as you thought. In the end, you grabbed the first things you could find and avoided eye contact with the old man at the counter. Running back up to the room, you didn’t even think before you opened the door, and there must be something about you and hotel rooms, because for the second night in a row you were greeted with a shirtless Frank Castle, standing in only a pair of sweats and a towel around his left shoulder.

You don’t know how the sight makes you feel, but you do know the physical reaction. Your mouth goes dry, and you feel like your legs are about to drop any second. Instead of acting like everything’s normal, though, you just chuck the wallet at him, grab a pile of clothes, and wordlessly shut yourself in the shower, hoping the scalding hot water will sweat out whatever the hell is wrong with you.

You open the new underwear. It was plain, white and clean, but it was yours, and you had bought it. Knowing that, you felt better than you ever had when you put them on. Sliding on another pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt that said NYPD, you come out of the bathroom, and you catch Franks face reading the shirt, smirking to himself. You don’t have the concentration to say anything, because as much as he was now wearing a shirt, the sight of him still made you a little air headed.

“Where’s the gun?” Frank asks, and you point to the table on the opposite side of the room. Frank swears under his breath and grabs it, half shoving it into your chest. “When I said ‘keep it on you’, I meant on you.”

“You want me to shower with it? Coddle it, tuck it in at night? What about-“

“Christ. Okay, t’s too late for this shit. Just stand over here.” He points to a spot right in front of the door. You do it, admittedly with a whole lot of resistance. “Take the clip out.”

“The - oh, okay. Like-“ You go to switch someone on the side, and Franks hand stops your movement, warmth enveloping the backs of your hands as he grabs you.

“You just loaded it. Clip release is back here.” With one flick of his finger the clip releases onto the floor. “Safety is here. If you ain’t shooting, this is on. Try it.”

Remembering the way his hands moved on top of yours, you flick the switch off, then on, then back twice more just to be sure. Then you turn your head to look up at him, and he’s hanging right over your shoulder, arms still half outstretched ready to stop you - no, help you.

“Good. Think you can figure out which ones the trigger?”

“Funny.” You feel the hot air of his exhale on the back of your neck, and your shoulders tighten.

“Alright. Now-“ He bends down, picking up the released clip. “Reload it. Slides in here. Just like that.”

“Is that it?” You hear a satisfying ‘click’, and you check the safety again to make sure it’s on.

“Atta girl. Now you keep it loaded, and keep it on you.” He walks away from behind you, and you are still standing there, watching the door like he told you until you hear the groan of the bed, and spin just in time to see Frank chuck his shirt off and start getting in.

“What the hell are you doing?”

“Going to be. We’re almost in New York. Could of been followed today.” He says in short, tired sentences as if that was answer enough. No one was tracking you. No one even knew who you were, let alone that you were working together. If that was what you were doing.

“Is that really necessary?”

“Probably not.”

“How come you get to sleep first?”

“You slept all day. I drove.”

“Well, you didn’t let me drive.” His eyes were already closed, but it was probably true. It was only the third time you had seen him sleep, and he needed it a lot more than you did. You sat down on the floor, shuffling back so that your back was leaning against the bed, gun still trained on the door.

“Wake me up in 5 hours.” Franks voice was low, and you managed a nod. It wasn’t long before you could tell he was asleep, his breathing slow and even.

The next few hours pass uneventfully, and you can’t stop your head from dropping back, eyes closing as tiredness overtakes you. He was right, you should probably be keeping an eye out, or practising using this gun, but before long it was long forgotten on the floor, and you were pretty sure you had passed out when Frank started moving behind you.

“Just get in.” Again, his voice was low, and it made your entire body wake up. You turn, the darkness of the room obscuring the view of most of him, but you can see he had shuffled back, giving you just enough room to slide in beside him.

“What about-“

“Get in.” He shifts again. You don’t waste anymore time, inching yourself under the covers. You tried not to think about how warm it was, how close he was to you, or how he hadn’t rolled over, and his face was inches from your back.

“I thought you said we had to sleep in shifts.” Your voice comes out as a whisper, almost lost in the sound of passing traffic outside.

“Not like you could hit anything with that gun anyways.” You turn around, facing him in the darkness. “Neither of us have slept. Once we get to the city, we’ll figure it out.”

“But you-“

“Shh.” God - you really were losing your mind out here. You squeeze your eyes shut, blocking out the way the simple sound made your entire body zap with electricity, and attempt to get some sleep.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

The next few days pass faster than Frank wanted. Eventually you make your way back into the city, and both of you are antsy to get this shit on the road. He’s called Madani three time since you left that hotel, and she still has nothing. The last time he spoke to her, he nearly threw his phone into the wall.

Since then, he’s been trying to figure it out himself. The Colonel couldn’t have gone far, not when you were still on the run, but he would have gone into hiding considering who was after him. He still had a decent army of men behind him, so he’d need space and resources. Using a laptop he grabbed from the storage house, he was currently pulling up every place in a ten mile radius that could manage holding the organisation, while he had you pulling up any mention online of ‘New America’.

He’d been watching you for the past couple days. Not that he had much choice, a flash of shitty hotel rooms and days crammed in a car swamped his memory. It’s usually this part that he hated, finding himself itching to get back out there, make a real dent. He was, and you were too, but he didn’t think he hated it as much this time.

You had been occupying his time. You, and your side comments that pissed him off to all hell, your laugh when he said something that was apparently funny to you, even when he was being dead serious. You were everywhere, in everything he did, and he thought he would of hated it. He was so used to doing this alone, so used to being on his own that he’d made a routine, and he thought he would have hated that being fucked up.

He didn’t. He could hardly remember what it had been like before, now you where here. He think he liked the company, not that he’d tell you that. You’d be cocky as shit.

“So, these guys are fucking awful.” You were sipping on some bright pink drink in the opposite booth of the bar, your face screwed up and eyebrows nearly crossed. “I’m pretty sure I just read a thread about how Hitler ‘did have some strong points’. Tell me you’ve had more luck?”

“Might have something. Reports of a break in down at the docks, near the shipping stations.” He spins the laptop around to you, and watches as you squint, trying to read.

“I think I’ve seen that guy before.” Frank leans over, your hair brushing against his forehead as he moves. “Yeah, Joey or Sam or something.”

“Not Sam.” Frank knows it’s not Sam, because Sam was dead in a garage, probably half decomposed.

“Right, it was Joey. He was one of the guys who carried me out that day. He works with the Colonel.” Eyes wide, you stare up at him. “This could be it, right? It’s big enough, only from two days ago?”

“Only one way to find out.” He shuts the laptop and chucks a few bills on the counter, hearing your feet hit the pavement after him.

“We can go tonight?” He can hear the desperation in your voice, and it hasn’t left his mind that you are on borrowed time. Your brother was out there somewhere, and he knows you’ve only waited this long because you have no other choice than to wait for him. 

“Yeah, but- hold on.” You were about to fly past him, but he grabs your arm and hauls you back. He knew you both might only have one shot at this, and as soon as you draw attention to their hide out, they will either scatter or the FBI will move in before he can get to the Colonel. “You can’t pull the same stuff you did back at the safe house. We do this my way, or we don’t do it at all.”

“What - if you are suggesting I sit at home and wait-”

“No, but you don’t go tearing limbs off as soon as you see someone. We play it slow, and you’ll do it when I say.” You stop him on the street, arm coming out and whacking against his chest like he knew you hated.

“Who the hell do you think you are? I get that you’re some one man army type, but you have no right telling me how to do this.”

“How long’s it been, huh? Since you fought someone who knew you were coming? Not counting your stunt on the drive way, you tell me how long it’s been since you fought people who were prepared.” You were breathing through your nose, eyes bright and fiery like they always did when you were pissed. “These guys are on edge. They’re waiting for a fight.”

“Didn’t have a problem taking you down on the first go.”

“You broke into my house. You said it yourself, the past two months you been taking down one man hits who had no idea you were coming. Before that, you’re a good three years out of the game.”

“Oh, fuck you.”

“You know I’m right. That’s why you’re so fuckin’ pissed off.” You shove him into the wall and start up the stairs to the room you had for the night. He knew he won, then, because you would have stayed and yelled at him till you proved your point. If you had one to make. He didn’t know why he gave a shit. If you wanted to walk in and get yourself shot to pieces, he shouldn’t care.

Still, he was racing up the stairs to make sure you were still there. The door slams behind him, and you were already packing your shit. You were losing sunlight, and the docks were a good thirty minutes away.

“Just listen for one goddamn second!” He shouted, and every part of you froze, spine straightening as you dropped the gun he gave you. “I’ve done this for years. Guys like this, they’re backed into a corner. Waiting. We need to thin them out from the outside, then you do whatever you wanna do after that. I’m just askin’ you to think.”

“My brother is...” He knows that’s why you’re on edge. He walks around in front of you, bending down and picking up the gun next to you.

“I know. This gets us closer, but he’s gonna need you to keep your head.” You swallow and nod, blinking away a tear he knows you don’t want him to see. He pretends he doesn’t. “C’mon. You can learn on the job.” He shoves the gun into your chest, and you both silently pack everything into a bag and leave the room.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

“You see him?”

“I see a bird. It’s eating something.”

“Shift the scope.”

“I think it’s a hot cheeto.”

“Move.” Frank shoves your shoulder with his own and takes his place behind the scope. You were both laying flat on the roof top, watching the storage unit from the police report.

“I don’t need that thing to see. No one’s come in or out. We’re wasting time. Just let me go down there-“

“And get your ass shot, then I’ll have to cover you.” He’s still got one eye down the sniper, the other shut tight. It’s dark out, but the moonlight is reflecting off the water, almost giving the illusion of a spotlight.

“You don’t know that.”

“There. You see ‘im?” Frank says quietly, and you focus, your eyes staring straight down at the exit door near the wharf. If you blinked you would of missed it, but a head ducks straight down, and you catch a eye full of blonde hair before he disappears out of sight again.

“Okay, so there’s people.” Frank takes his face off the sniper to look at you.

“Like I said.”

“We don’t know their ‘New America’.”

“I got a feeling. Plus, that’s the guy from the photo.” Okay, he had you there. “Not just a pretty face, huh?”

You resist the urge to smack him over the head, only because it would be too hard to reach with the angle your both laying at, and settle for rolling your eyes.

“I regret ever complimenting you.” He smiles and then looks back down the scope, a calm focus coming over him as soon as he zooms in.

“Military uniforms. You see anyone else you recognise?” You try to block out some of the reflective moonlight, squinting and searching for a face you can put to a name.

“I can’t see anyone.”

“C’mere.” Frank shuffles over, and a hand pulls your arm across the roof so you were at the exact angle Frank was just looking down. He was laying on his side, and every time he breathed in you could feel his chest brush your arm. It was increasingly hard to focus, but you tried, closing your eye like Frank did and looking down the scope. He puts his arm over your back, and before you can register how he was almost on top of you, you see something.

“There. That guy.”

“Who is it?”

“God, they’ve beaten him to shit.” You take your eye off the scope, not wanting to look anymore. As if you couldn’t hate these guys more. “The doctor who used to sew me up when I was with the Colonel. They have him inside.”

“Alright. You got the ear-piece?” You tap your right ear, the small communication device playing a little song as it connects. “You draw ‘em out, I’ll pick ‘em off. Then you wait.”

“Okay - Jesus, you’ve only said it 300 times.”

“And I’d bet you still didn’t get it.”

“Stick to your sniper, marine. I’ll show you how it’s really done.” With that, you jump up and swing yourself off the rooftop, landing as soft as you can onto the concrete below.

You stick to the shadows, and for the first time since you broke away from the Colonel, you feel somewhat in your element. All this time with Frank you’ve been learning new shit, figuring out how much you really don’t know about the real world, but here? Here, you know what you’re doing, and it was almost too easy to fall back into.

The first step is to draw them out. In your pocket, you pull the pin on a smoke grenade Frank instructed you how to use and roll it towards the door, swiftly climbing up the side of the building, holding out of sight when the four men waltz out to investigate.

In the next second, Frank has blitzed through all four, using only three bullets.

“Show-off.” You hear his laugh cut off over the receiver, and it makes you feel warm despite the cold air blowing around the docks.

“Thought you were gonna show me how it’s done?” As if he called them out, another two guards start coming out from the other side. With a planted look up at the roof top you know only he would see, you drop down right in front of the two men.

“Evening, boys.” You give them a second. You want to see the recognition on their faces - you want them to have time to figure it out. To know who would be their end. You remember these two. One day, they brought you dinner and kicked it under your cell instead of sliding it, and you had to eat off the floor.

Their faces drop, and just as they go to cry out, your hands grab around both of their throats. With one quick snap of your arms, you rip their throats out and their bodies flop and sink lifelessly into the water behind you. You bend down and wash the blood off your hands, and jump back up onto the roof.

“Can you see inside?” Moving on your hands and knees, you crane your neck over the side of the building to catch a look.

“30 or 40 of them. Not all are armed.”

“Must be a skeleton crew. More might come. You see the Colonel?”

“No.” Damn it. He should be here. As much as he was an asshole, he was loyal to his men. Frank was thinking the same thing.

“He’ll be close.” You sit back up straight. “Alright, we need to do this with no alarms. You got your gun?”

“Yes. It’s digging into my thigh.” You try to shift it to a better angle, but it’s better strapped to your leg than stuffed half down your pants like Frank had his.

“Alright. I’m gonna hit the lights.” You lift your head to the fuse box sitting halfway up a lamp post. “When it goes dark, I’ll come in. You stay up there and pick off any that come out. If someone bolts, you tell me and hold your position. I’ll swing around and clean up.”

“Sir, yes sir!” You whisper, and you can hear Franks expression through the silence. The next thing you know, the dock is plunged into real darkness, a few of the men inside murmuring and the doors open.

Staying true to your word, you sit up the top of the building like a hawk. Two men come out, and you waste five bullets to take them out. The silencer on your pistol was working wonders, none of the men inside alerted in the slightest, but your aim needed serious work.

You knew when Frank arrived, because he most definitely wasn’t silent. He was holding two automatic rifles, and emptied the clips shooting into darkness. You think this must be what he looked like that day you got out from underground. Unhinged and bat-shit insane, that stupid skull like a bullseye on his chest.

You kept one eye on the outside, and four more men made a run for it out the back. You hit two, but had to reload, so you only had time to get one other before they were out of range. You could catch him - Frank said no alarms.

“Frank, I’m going for one. I’ll be back in a second.” Through the gun fire and screams, he manages out a reply.

“DONT FUCKIN’ MOVE!” It was too late - if that guy got away all of your effort would be for nothing. If the Colonel knew you were alive, if he thought he was being chased -

“Stay back!” The man raises a gun at you as you reach him, and you walk slow, backing him into a wall. The man shakes in his grip, but holds his stance firm. “You.”

“No need for introductions, then.”

“The Colonels pet.” He spits, and the name makes you recoil. You move fast, snatching the gun off him and pinning him to the wall by his throat. “He knew you would come.”

“Where is he.” You squeeze tighter, his eyes starting to bulge out of his head. If he knew where the Colonel was, where your brother was… you didn’t have time to drag it out of him. You could hear Frank thinning them out from here.

“You only know how to obey. That’s why you found The Punisher.” He growls under your grip.

“You don’t know shit.” Fucking hell. Don’t let him get in your head. Don’t let him get in your head.

“We knew you would come. The Colonel. The Gnucci’s. They knew you would come back for him. They said we just had to wait, and you would return on your knees, begging for retribution. Bobby Gnucci said he always wanted you on your knee-“ He never finished the sentence, because you snap his neck, watching as his jaw hangs open and swings before he crumples to the floor.

“OUTSIDE!” Frank yells through your ear, and you sprint back before you can think too long on the dead man’s words. You see them - four more uniforms running for a boat on the wharf. You shoot two of them, but two make it to the water, so you aim for the engine. With enough bullets it drops off the back, and you launch yourself into the boat. You make quick work of the remaining men, forgoing the gun to work off your anger.

“Done.” You say to Frank, who doesn’t reply. You say his name, and nothing again. A surge of panic comes through you and you sprint inside, seeing no one for a second. You aren’t prepared for how quickly the panic turns to fear.

Then, you turn and see Frank bending down, untying the ropes in the dim overhead of a nearly burnt out flame, the doctor still sitting in the chair the men tied him to.

“You.” The doctor breathes, and he begins to shake his head. “Please. Please I have- he has my-“

“I’m not going to hurt you.” Your voice comes out softer than you thought possible, and it wavers a little. As soon as he saw you, he thought you were here to kill him. You know why. It’s all he ever saw you do. All you ever do.

“You are with him?” Frank stands and chucks the ropes to the side. You try not to look at him as you nod once.

“Is he gonna be okay?” You subtly ask to Frank, who nods once. His face was bruised and leaking blood from somewhere, but he stood on his own. It looked like you had gotten here just at the beginning of whatever they had planned.

“You saved me.” The doctor grabs your arm, fisting the material of your shirt and Frank flinches, bracing and ready to rip him off you.

“He saved you.” You tilt your head to Frank, and the doctor looks back to you.

“I knew you were not one of them.” His thick Russian accent is full of sincerity, and you swallow harshly. “You were never like them.”

“What?” The words knock the wind out of you.

“All those months, and you never became what they wanted. You were never like them.” There was a look on his face, something like sincerity under the black and blue covering his face. “I hope you are able to return to your brother.”

“You - why would you say that? I was-“

“You were never cruel. They wanted you to be one of them, to think like they would. You had the opportunity to do to me as you pleased, as they did, and you didn’t.” You think back, all the times you were left alone with the doctor while he poked and prodded at the Colonel’s command. You only ever directed your anger at the man in the army uniform, because you knew the doctor was just like you.

You stare at him, small, sharp breaths cracking through your lungs. You felt everything start to get smaller, and you took two steps back. Frank grabs onto your arm.

“Hey.”

“Need air.” You rip your arm away despite Frank calling for you, and step outside onto the docks, where three dead bodies lay on top of each other. You see the two in the boat as well, their necks bent at inhuman angles.

How could he say that, when this was what you just did? You were one of them - are one of them. You are no better than any of these men. The only person with any kind of moral code was the one inside, wrapping up the ropes the doctor was tied into. Frank was so good - not just as what he did. At who he was. He was so sure, and he was right. You were grateful for the guns. You’d be dead without him. Without him, you would of died, either by the Colonels hand, the Gnuccis, or maybe even your own.

Frank filled your thoughts as you practised your breathing, and he was the last thing you thought about as the bullet ripped through your stomach, and you fell face first into the freezing water.

[next chapter]

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

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