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potatomountain · 7 months

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Got lost in my head and came to a lil realization-

Tumblr is NOT a safe space for people on the spectrum. Not unless you're in specific communities on Tumblr that are about the spectrum.

Honestly the internet isn't a safe place for us because the amount of masking and effort we go through to look over out messages and posts before sending them out is exhausting. Having to go over our own thoughts in a little post like this just so we aren't dismissed, ostracized, or frowned upon for our 'odd thinking' or 'wrong words' is so freaking stressful.

Especially in a creative space for those on the spectrum. There are so many things our brain does in that apartment people would normally find offensive or wrong and that I've been shamed for it's surreal.

So again: Tumblr is NOT a safe space for those on the spectrum.

Edit- [11-08, 3pm cst]

I didn't think this would get any views or anything cuz it was legit just midnight ramblings but I woke up to so many notifications.

I'm glad that there are many who do feel safe on Tumblr and it stays that way for you. However there are some that understand where I personally come from. I have found friends, communities, and the like on the internet [and on Tumblr] that have become safe spaces for me.

Tumblr was one as a whole where I could share my creative side and relish in some acceptance until- like I'm sure a lot on the spectrum have experienced- I did something that was seen as morally wrong in a way I didn't understand and seemed to become a social pariah because of it. People I considered safe blocked me, or soft blocked me and we went from sharing moments daily to never speaking or acknowledging each other. I was harassed and told that 'not understanding how what I did was considered wrong' was an excuse to avoid accountability. Attempting to explain how my brain worked was seen as 'attention/pity seeking'.

It's not the first time I encountered situations like this just because of the way I think, things I say or do, that go against societal norms and was met in harsh ways. Just the first time in a space I thought safe so soon after my own diagnosis so perhaps it's my personal feelings that make Tumblr no longer safe. Maybe I just got unlucky.

Either way- thank you all for your input, thoughts and stories and I really really hope that should any of you find yourself in a situation like mine you are met with acceptance and understanding and people who will stand by you.

#autism spectrum disorder #neurodiversity #neurodivergent #neurospicy #adhd problems #adhd brain #adhd things #masking is exhausting #author in their feels #author speaks #admin thoughts #admin speaks #tumblr really be a source of panic and anxiety for me on an alarming scale sometimes #feels like im back in school trying to make friends but everyone looks at me with disgust or pity #might delete l8r

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thelaurenshippen · 7 months

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cw: harry potter, jk rowling, transphobia

I occasionally see posts/get messages about the various harry potter references in the bright sessions, etc. and I've gotten a bunch of new followers recently so just so any new/younger listeners of my shows know:

jk rowling is a terrible transphobe whom I hold zero respect for and I haven't given a dime of my money to her since she revealed who she truly is. I want the whole bright universe to be a safe space for trans people (including the trans folks in our cast and crew!) and if I could go back and remove those references, I would. but I can't! harry potter was an extremely significant part of my life until...well, until it became very clear who she really was. it makes me so sad to think that folks might be finding TBS now and get thrown out of the story by these references, but just know that the people who made the show do not stand by jk, and that in many ways, the show is a product of its time.

#the bright sessions #harry potter #jk rowling #transphobia #I know there's PLENTY to say about the bigotry in the actual books and I think there's a lot of merit to those criticisms #and I'll own to choosing not to see some of that stuff before all this went down bc the books were meaningful to me #(this is not HP specific - another beloved childhood book series that was EVEN more formative to me growing up)#(is also something I've grappled with in recent years bc I think the author is actually probably wildly misogynistic)#(even though he's never behaved badly (far as I know) in his public life - there's stuff in the text)#BUT ANYWAY #it can be so hard to remember that we didn't have ANY inkling of her bigotry in this regard until 2018 #all of the original run of TBS was written before that #and I'll admit I gave jk the benefit of the doubt in 2018 re: her liking that tweet! I wanted to give her a chance to learn and grow #and she did....not do that #but TAMA was written in that little grace period #and then a few references in TCT were taken out during recording bc june of 2020 was when she really started to go mask off #and so we were making changes in real time #we didn't know what to do about quidditch #bc we were like 'this is a sport that people play in college and it's just called that?'#'and it's already canon that caleb plays?'#and it wasn't called quadball yet #anyway not trying to make excuses!#just know that none of those references were put in with any malice #and I guess I *could* go back and rerecord all those lines and replace them #but I know enough about my original audio engineering to know that it woudl be VERY hard to make it sound natural #and idk I do think there's something to be said for not covering up errors in old work #I'm not going to try to pretend HP wasn't important to me #EDIT: I've turned off reblogs for this post #also this is not me trying to tell other people how to approach their own HP fandom #fanworks especially - there's no benefiting jo in that - and I think it's totally legit for ppl to want to take HP as their own!

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bananonbinary · 5 months

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"chuck tingle uninvited to book festival because of his mask and then reinvited because ugh i GUESS if it's an autism aid we'll allow it" is the most ridiculous thing ive ever heard. literally why did they give a shit in the first place, why would they want the author of books that famously have titles like "Pounded In The Butt By The Sentient Physical Manifestation Of My Slippery Slope Argument" to show up, but like, not act "too weird"

wtf did you THINK you were getting

#it doesnt matter that its an aid bc literally what did you EXPECT #why would you even want him there if you didnt want HIM there you know???#literally why invite him in the first place if you want him to be anything other than his very public and easy-to-check brand #why would a mask put you off anyway theres been MUCH weirder shit authors have done before #im reminded of toby fox and how he refuses to show his face since undertale came out #no one's out here getting mad about THAT #he's allowed to put a lil cardboard doggie in a chair and type in all his responses from a remote computer #and everyone's like 'hell yeah man'#why is this different

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aroaessidhe · 7 months

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aro & ace Books: Assassins

The Perfect Assassin - ace mlm MC

The Butterfly Assassin - aroace MC, aspec side characters, canon in book 2.

Assassins: Discord: ace side character, grey-ace MC in book 2

Foul Lady Fortune: demisexual MC, aroace side character

City of Strife: one of the MCs is a demiromantic assassin (various other aspec characters)

Mask of Shadows: aro side character (mentioned in book 2)

#aspec books / aspec database / tumblr masterpost

#aspec books #asexual books #the butterfly assassin #the perfect assassin #foul lady fortune #city of strife #mask of shadows is just a brief mention; but i needed one more for an even number and the author is ace too so #(brief mention of aroness. lots of assassining)

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tua-masked-author · 2 months

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🌺 📻 Summer remix ‘24 📻 🌺

Hello masqueraders! We are back again for another round of TMA in June (8th-29th). This round, to celebrate the end of TUA, we want to appreciate the contributions of this fandom, so its time to REMIX!

🎭 What is a remix?

A remix is a fanwork of a fanwork!! There are a lot of different interpretations, but to keep things simple we are taking the broadest possible definition. A remix could be a scene written from another character’s pov, a story where the roles have been swapped, or the answer to the question “what if [this] had happened instead?” It could be an illustration of a scene in a fic, or a full blown comic, or a recreation of a drawing with a different mood in another style and setting. It could be fanfic of an artist’s drawing or fanart of an author’s story.

Basically it's a chance to show love and pay homage to another fan work by creating a new complimentary fan work!

🌺 You can find a more in-depth definition of a remix here. 🌺

The fanwork you are inspired by could be any TUA fanwork; fanfic and fanart of course, but also a tumblr post about an au that you are particularly fond of, a fansong; even a gifset with a strong concept or a meta essay you were grabbed by. We’re appreciating ALL fanworks here!

🎭 Do I have to do a remix?

As always the theme is optional; you don't have to do a remix. However, we strongly encourage everyone to give it a shot! We want to look back on all the great fanworks this fandom has to offer and appreciate the fans who have made our community!

🎭 But how do I know if the author/artist will be okay with it?

In place of a prompt sheet this round, we are letting people submit their fanworks to be remixed! (If you aren’t sure you’d like to participate, no worries! The submission form carries no expectation that you draw or write for the event.)

🌺 You can find the link to submit your works here. 🌺

🌺 and here are the works submitted for remixing! 🌺

Additionally, lots of authors will include permission statements on their AO3 profiles, so if you already have a fic in mind it would be worth checking for one. Alternatively, you can contact the author or artist and ask!

🎭 This is still the Masked Author though, right?

Yes! As always, when the posting period arrives (which we will announce in a more in depth rules post soon) you will post to the event collection that will anonymize your work, and afterwards there will be a period where you all put on your detective hats and try to solve who’s who. And if YOUR work gets remixed, then you’ll be getting an anonymous treat and get to try to suss out who gave it to you!

#tua #the umbrella academy #tua events #tua masked author #tua masked artist #tma summer remix

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emosyzoth · 7 months

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hyehehe. if any gaf........

#^^^first one. got mad cause pango was saying stupid things like "you cant beat people with hammers what the hell'#i dree it without its mask too.....................not that the public will ever see. LOL #my singing monsters #msm #hyehehe #i fool on her tom till we get into some shenanigans < AUTHORS NOTEW

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hollysoda · 9 months

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I kinda hope we get more info eventually on the Ancient Hero in botw because if they are actually some kind of Zonai Link I am 100% shoving them into a Linked Universe fanfiction. 9 Hylians and their tall cat friend

#if y’all can put Spirit and Mask into fics I can put the Ancient Hero #would their nickname be Ancient?? or maybe Zonai??#idk I just love them a lot #linked universe #linkeduniverse #ancient hero's aspect #this totally wasn’t inspired by the Hero’s Aspect fics (forgot author name)

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slocumjoe · 3 months

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autistic danse being so comfortable and himself in the bos because the nature and standards don't require him to mask too much

#(obey all rules and routines) autistics hooting and hollering and doing backflips #im joking only partially #my autism experience is (I HAVE NOTHING TO DO SO IM GOING TO EAT DRYWALL) then someone gives me an outline to follow #THANK GOD FINALLY I DONT HAVE TO STUMBLE BLINDLY THROUGH LIFE #LEAD ON CAPTAIN #and then danse has some authority as a paladin but not too much responsibility compared to higher roles #so he gets the benefit of IM JUST A PION COMFY IN LINE LIKE THE REST #BUT he also gets to reprimand and uphold ~order~ and tell ppl to knock off their shit #like no wonder bro was tweaking I WOULD ALSO LOSE MY SHIT #FUCK YOU MEAN IM NOT ME. I WASNT EVEN BEING ~ME~ MOST OF THE TIME ARE YOU FOR FUCKING REAL. THATS LIKE FOUR LAYERS OF MASKING #EXCEPT I WAS MASKING TO MYSELF??

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i-suck-at-this · 2 months

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New work!! This time it's ATLA! You can check it out > here <

#Essentially it boils down to zuko loosing his voice and aang reties his blue spirit mask #avatar the last airbender #atla #aang #zuko #void updates #writers of tumblr #authors of tumblr #ao3 #ao3 fanfic #fanfiction

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alex-a-roman · 1 year

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The hollow act

Leave me be Close that door and don't look back, For every word I said to you, Every whisper, Every time I crossed the line, Every vow And every smile, Everything that I let out – All manufactured lies.

Forget everything you know about me, I learned to act in second grade When a bunch of sleazy oafs Told me I'll never be good enough So I started to paint rays of sunshine on my face And offer people happiness, all gift wrapped In shiny words with clowny smiles And please don't ask me who I am Because I have no clue, All I know is this fucking lie.

~ A. A. Roman

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silly-stringray · 5 months

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(SPOILERS FOR THE LAND OF STORIES) okay so sorta outing myself as a Land Of Stories fan, but who cares the it’s a great book series. So we all know the potion that can make any work of fiction real, and this potion worked on greek mythology. Greek mythology isn’t collectively seen as fiction though, majority does, but accent Greeks, and some people nowadays, see it as real. This is the same as the bible. Not everyone sees it at nonfiction, some see it as completely fiction. Would the potion work on the bible???? Could have the masked man got fucking God on his side???

#the land of stories #the wishing spell #the enchantress returns #a grimm warning #across the kingdoms #an authors Odyssey #worlds collide #chris colfer #the masked man #the bible #god #alex bailey #conner bailey #the bailey twins

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divinekangaroo · 9 days

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Not to mention the immense irony that the 'farewell' speech Tommy gives to his family opens exactly as would a politician’s speech about honouring his promises.

Emotion the enemy of oratory, etc.

#no lizzie and no arthur #must've really fucked him up that :( but he probably couldn't have said as much as he did if they were there #also rewatched that final scene with tommy and alfie and my god alfie is such an arsehole to him!#alfie is still furious for tommy's failure on the beach #alfie is furious tommy is the one who restored his authority #alfie went and found a Gypsy girl in a circus with blue eyes and black hair who has a stocky strong masculine build who happened to-#-have the same name as his mother Edna; alfie proposed instantly and fucks her while staring psychotically into her blue eyes #sent tommy 'i'm a little busy right now' shelby a personalised wedding invite and was ignored #alfie furious about that too. the number of times tommy's humiliated him now #it was supposed to be the other way around but alfie is oddly and repetitively impotent around tommy #alfie giving too much of a fuck then suddenly backpedalling and scornfully insisting he does not give a fuck #alfie's emotional state is permanently a sixteen year old boy just masked by extreme verbosity

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assaily · 1 year

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Been a while since I’ve posted anything fic related, but I’m not sure if I’ve ever talked about this fic before.

The basic premise is the Handler/Commission put some kind of kill switch in Five that would slowly destroy his body planned obsolescence style in the event that he ever successfully defected. It’s essentially a sickfic and another one of those no sparrow, no season 3 au’s bc i wrote this a year and a half ago and the season wasn’t even out yet. I found it again this morning bc I finally had some thoughts for it after all this time.

Anyway, here is some gratuitous angst and Diego cuddling Five. CW for mild suicidal ideation.

---

Five looked miserable. Pale and shivering, he looked so frail and small, so old and young at the same time. Diego wasn’t a fan, he didn’t want to be in the room any longer than he had to. The space heater next to the bed was blasting like a Mojave wind, and still Five shivered quietly on his bed.

Five didn’t complain, not even to inform them he was cold. He hadn’t complained this whole time, and maybe that’s what was getting to Diego. Five was miserable, it was obvious he was hurting, it was obvious he was struggling just to stay conscious enough to mechanically munch on his peanut butter crackers. But he didn’t say a thing.

A cracker was left half-eaten between two fingers, his head drooped and his eyes slipped shut. He slumped into himself, still shivering. Diego frowned, slapping his knees as he stood from the armchair. “Alright.”

His voice startled Five, likely having forgotten he was there again. He flinched, head popping up, bloodshot eyes confused and darting before landing on Diego’s face. The relief was palpable, his shoulders slumping, something relaxing in the pinch of his expression.

“Diego,” he croaked.

“Yeah, just me bud.”

“Are you leaving?” He tried to make it sound like an innocent question, tried his damndest to keep his inflection flat, Diego could tell. But he could also hear the quiet fear burbling beneath it.

“No,” he lied, and almost sat back down again.

Five nodded and seemed to remember his cracker. He nibbled on the corner of it again, his arm shaking with that little effort. “It’s not stale,” he remarked, hardly above a whisper. It was the third time he’d said that about the cracker and every time it struck at something soft in Diego’s chest.

“Fresh crackers, just for you.”

“Fresh…” he rolled the word around in his mouth like he was tasting it. “Where’d you find them?”

“The store on fifth.”

Five nodded slowly, processing. The last two times that was the end of the conversation. Diego hoped it would be the end of this one too, but then Five looked over at him, a stark confusion breaking through the dead-eyed exhaustion. “Isn’t the roof…?” he made a fluttery motion with his hand, dropping crumbs into his lap.

“Roof is fine, Five.”

He shook his head, brow pinching. “No, I remember it collapsed.” He paused, Diego at a loss for how to answer. “There’s a pharmacy on tenth, it still has stuff. There might be medicine there.”

“We have medicine for you,” Diego said, gesturing at the table with the small battery of bottles atop it.

Five looked over at it, expression falling blank as he failed to process something. He stared for too long, unblinking and unmoving, that Diego figured he’d lost him again. Lights on, but no one was home.

“I hurt,” Five sighed at long last, breaking the silence and his stillness with another shiver.

Diego chuffed a surprised laugh. “I bet you do.”

“I’m done,” he said softly. “I don’t want to be here anymore.”

Diego swallowed down the lump that jumped into his throat. Five didn’t complain, not about the pain, the confusion, the exhaustion.

Five shivered again, cracker forgotten.

Diego couldn’t stand it anymore. “Okay, okay.” He needed to do something, anything to help. He couldn’t just stand there watching Five in misery, watching over him as he got worse and worse, as even the pills and syrups and whatever pain meds Mom tried to give him failed to do a goddamn thing.

“Are you still cold?”

Five looked up at the question, considering him for a solid ten seconds before nodding clumsily. “It’s winter,” he said as if that explained everything.

Diego didn’t have the heart to tell him it was the dead of August. “I’m cold too,” he said, reaching down to turn the heater off. Diego was sure Five didn’t even know what the damn thing was but his shivering took on a new ferocity the moment the coils darkened. He looked confused, lost and as Diego approached the bedside, suddenly defensive. His arms curled over his chest, jaw clenching, pulling himself back as if he could get away from Diego.

“You’re not--” he started, aborted with his mouth open, eyes darting around the room. “Wait, I don’t--”

Diego crouched at the bedside, realizing he was looming a little. “You’re okay, it’s just me.” He reached out, careful to keep his palm up and gesture slow. Five watched his hand, pulling back from him as he tried to touch his arm. “It’s just me,” he repeated.

Five didn’t complain, and he never talked about why he was so damn untrusting of them in his confused state. Diego didn’t want to think about who could have planted that mistrust and why. He knew why. He’d spent enough time with Lila. He’d met her mother. The first person Five interacted with in decades. Diego would have trust issues too.

“Diego,” Five said flatly, more an affirmation than anything else.

“Yeah.”

“What are you doing here?”

He almost wanted to know where ‘here’ was for Five. Somewhere cold, somewhere beyond the end of the world, somewhere lost in his own past. “I’m here to save you.” It sounded stupid coming out of his mouth, feeling it burn in his eyes.

Five paused for half a second, something in his eyes growing sharper than it had in days. Then he laughed, a single mournful guffaw that threw his head back and nearly toppled him back into his pillows. “Save me?” he asked, incredulous. “How? You’re dead, remember?” He smiled wide, shoulders shaking with more than just cold. “You’re dead.” His mirth turned to grief in a second, his expression twisting into honest fury if he’d had the strength. “You can’t save me,” he spat. “I have to save you.”

Diego reached across the bed and put his hand over Five’s arm. His skin was cold as ice, his wrist sharp and bony under Diego’s palm. “You already saved us.”

Five’s anger was smothered by the touch on his arm, his entire attention drawn to it. He opened his mouth, but only a half-aborted burst of air made it out.

Diego didn’t waste time. With the heater off, Five had nothing keeping him warm and Diego didn’t dare let him go now. “I’m cold, too.” Diego said again, catching Five’s attention back to his face and voice.

“I’m cold,” Five said, and Diego couldn’t tell if he was saying a truth or just repeating the last thing he heard.

“Let me in there, then.”

“Huh?”

Diego didn’t wait for him to figure it out. He half-stood, slipping his shoes off and dragging back the covers in one move. He pulled himself under the blankets, one arm around Five’s shoulders, the other making sure his brother was still covered.

“What are you--” Five realized half-way through the sentence that Diego was warm. The question forgotten, Five pressed himself into Diego’s side, shivering fiercely. “Oh,” he sighed, hands finding warm places to shove themselves into.

“Yeah, thought you might like this better.” Even though the old man would never admit it in his entire life. Neither would Diego. No one was home to see this blatant display of affection, so Diego could deal. He was pretty sure Five wasn’t going to remember a thing about this later.

He flicked the half-cracker to the floor, got himself comfortable, Five slumping more and more of his weight against him. His shivering was easy to feel, his whole body so cold. This wasn’t normal, and it settled uncomfortably in Diego’s gut. He wrapped his tiny older brother in his arms, tucking him against his chest to lay on the pillows together.

It took a while for the shivering to subside, took even longer for Five’s breathing to ease and his body to relax. “Diego,” he whispered, so quietly Diego nearly missed it.

He hummed, letting it rumble in his chest so Five could hear it where his ear was pressed against him.

“Diego,” he said again, and that was all. Nothing else to it, but Diego understood this time. An affirmation of gratitude in a whispered little tone, hidden every time he said their names. He’d fought so hard for them, and now Diego couldn’t stop imagining him when he was actually thirteen, alone and starving and whispering their names, putting everything into surviving so he could see them again. So he could come home.

It wasn’t fair that he couldn’t even have that.

Diego held him a little tighter, frail and bony and so, so cold. “You’re gonna be alright.” He was going to get better.

“I won’t tell anyone,” Five said softly, still below that careful whisper.

A laugh burst from Diego, surprised and a little wet. He swallowed the burning lump in his throat and closed his eyes so the tears would roll away and get lost on the pillow. “Thanks.”

“Don’t cry over me.”

Diego couldn’t answer that, couldn’t hold him any tighter, he could already feel his bones creaking. “You’ll be okay.”

“You’re an idiot.”

“Go to sleep.”

“I’ll wake up,” he promised.

Diego let out the breath he was holding like a balloon, eyes clouding. “Shut up and go to sleep.” It wasn’t even a fear, he refused to acknowledge it.

“I’m not worth… all this.”

“Shut up.” Diego gripped the back of his neck, too hard at first, making Five tense. He softened his hold, kneading his thumb into the muscle, feeling Five’s heart fluttering that awful off-rhythm beat against his fingertips. “Were we ever worth all that?”

“Yes,” he answered without hesitation. “You were.”

Diego shook his head, his chest aching, scratching gently into Five’s scalp. “You’re a part of this family, too.”

Five didn’t answer. He didn’t rebuke, didn’t affirm. Diego could feel him thinking about it, and hoped somewhere in that muddled little head of his that he’d at least internalize that. How could someone who loved so hard think he deserved so little in return. It wasn’t fair.

No more fair than how hard Five had to fight, only to die a few months after achieving it all. No, Diego refused. Five wasn’t going to die. Not yet, not this year or this decade. Five did everything in his power to protect them. It was time someone stepped up and did the same for him.

#in case it wasn't obvious i have a serious soft spot for Diego taking care of a semi-delirious Five #i mean Five being taken care in general but this specific flavor of it appears to be a favorite of mine lol #tua #the umbrella academy #fanfic #fic snips and bloopers #tua fanfic #tua fic #Five Hargreeves #my stuff #my fics #planned obsolescence #i considered saving this for masked author/artist coming up but i doubt this will be any condition for AO3 by may #and i feel like i'd get clocked so fast posting something like this #also i have a shit memory and i already had a planned obso tag so now im worried i;ve posted this before and have simply forgotten #if i did tumblr ate it #hope y'all enjoy :)

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