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david-talks-sw · 1 year

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When a Star Wars writer engages with the material but not the narrative.

I'm writing a long post about the Jedi and the clone troopers and there's a whole section that I had to remove because it was too long:

Karen Traviss' take on the Jedi and the clones.

I already wrote about why Karen Traviss' take on the Jedi and Yoda doesn't track with what George Lucas had established in his narrative of the Prequels. Since then, I've been able to do more research.

It's no secret that one of the reasons Traviss listed for criticizing the Jedi in the Expanded Universe books she wrote is their treatment of the clones (or at least what she understood it to be).

In 2008, she wrote a now-deleted blog post about it (it was really long, so I'm only including the part relevant to my point, if you want the full context you can look it up, this is old stuff).

So if you ask me, in the above quote, Traviss is essentially doing the equivalent of saying:

"Batman is a psycho elitist who beats up the mentally ill and indoctrinates kids, turning them into child soldiers for his unending crazy vigilante war on crime, and if you can't recognize that then you scare the living crap out of me."

Like... you can argue that, and a couple of comics have argued that.

But by and large, the general consensus is that Batman is a superhero, the Robins are his sons and daughter, and the "mentally ill" are in fact the Joker and Two-Face aka mass murderers.

So if you make that argument, that's you applying your real-life values and conclusions to a narrative that deliberately doesn't acknowledge those points, in-universe, in order to tell the story it wants to tell.

It's counting on your suspension of disbelief, defined as "the avoidance—often described as willing—of critical thinking and logic in understanding something that is unreal or impossible in reality, such as something in a work of speculative fiction, in order to believe it for the sake of enjoying its narrative."

The Jedi accepting the clones and the clones being slaves isn't a "delicate point". It's barely a point at all!

It's never addressed in the film (because of course it isn't, the Prequels are about Anakin and the Republic, not the clones).

It's only addressed once by Slick, an unreliable narrator, in The Clone Wars.

That's it. Hell, in 2008, when The Clone Wars writer Henry Gilroy was asked to comment on the relationship between clones and Jedi, he explicitly said he'd "rather not get into" that particular point.

I recently got Mythmaking: Behind the Scenes of 'Attack of the Clones' and nowhere is that detail touched on by Lucas at any point.

Nobody wants to touch on that point with a 10ft pole, because it's not relevant to the story.

So while Traviss acknowledges the Jedi are fictional characters, she doesn't follow that thread through to the end by acknowledging that fictional characters don't have free will, they must abide by the story and the whim of the writer.

She's engaging with the material, but refusing to engage with the narrative. She's having her cake and eating it too.

My reason for saying all this is that in the book Star Wars on Trial, she elaborates on her thought process upon discovering this detail.

Shortly before to this, she acknowledges twice that she knew nothing about Star Wars, beside seeing the original films in her youth.

Another writer who saw the new films and saw Mace Windu argue against there being a war...

... the worry on his face at the prospect of the Jedi being thrown at the Separatists...

... and the sheer melancholy on Yoda's face upon announcing the Clone War had begun...

... might have instead wondered how the Jedi, so opposed to war, could've ended up being generals.

Because while we don't see the Jedi openly protest the use of the clones in the film... they're not exactly giddy about it, either. All they can do is watch powerlessly as it gets voted by the Senate.

"The Jedi are there. But the Jedi aren't really allowed to be involved in the political process. They're there, but they can't suddenly step up and say, "No, no. You can't do that." They have to let the political process go." - George Lucas, Attack of the Clones, Commentary #2, 2002

We also don't see them take on the role of generals, either.

We only see them begrudgingly lead troops on Geonosis, specifically.

But they're not referred to as "generals" yet.

Another writer might have imagined a scene where after Geonosis, Mace Windu talks to Palpatine thinking the Jedi will go back to their roles as diplomats, and that what we saw in Attack of the Clones was a one-time thing to save Obi-Wan, but Palpatine politely goes:

"Ha! No. Didn't you hear? The Senate was so impressed by your performance on Geonosis that they voted to make you all generals in the GAR. Now, get back to the front."

Another writer might've elected to write them having that "big moral debate" she mentions.

Instead, Traviss immediately jumps on the "Jedi are elitists" train.

Because her personal experience with the military makes her sympathize with the clones and her personal belief is that - while the story may frame the Jedi as "the good guys" - nobody is that good a guy, real life people aren't that pure and selfless. There's gotta be something off about them and aHA! That's what it is!

That's her choosing to take that line of thought instead of one more in-line with the story, because she perceives it as unrealistic. But like... Star Wars isn't real life, it's a fairy tale.

That's like saying:

"The hunter in Little Red Riding Hood commits animal cruelty by cutting the Wolf open. He should've let nature take its course, the wolf earned that meal fair and square. If you think the hunter should've saved Red Riding Hood and her Grandma, then clearly you're the kind of monster who thinks one life is worth more than others."

... no?

The story's narrative clearly portrays the wolf as the villain of the tale and frames the Hunter saving Red Riding Hood as a good thing.

Disagreeing with that narrative is absolutely fine, but anybody who acknowledges the wolf is the bad guy in the story isn't automatically an animal hater and/or a bad person. Just because you say "the wolf is the villain" doesn't mean that you think that, in real life, killing wolves for shits and giggles is good.

Conversely, the narrative of the Prequels asks you to suspend your disbelief and not consider the implications that having a clone army entails. Because the use of clones doesn't have a direct impact on either Anakin or the Senate's stories.

Edit: I finished the post this one here originally spun out of!

You can find it here:

#Karen Traviss #clone troopers #jedi order #in defense of the jedi

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celaenaeiln · 5 months

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Nothing in Batman comics is canon because it’s literally 90% fanfiction written after the actual creators stopped writing the characters.

anon it doesn't work that way.

By that logic, practically noone exists because the original writer of Batman, Bob Kane and Bill Finger, only created Bruce, Dick, Alfred, and the villains gallery. That's it.

No Barbara, no Jason, no Tim, no Damian, Steph, Cass, Duke, Lucius, Tim Fox, Kate, Talia - there's no one then.

But suppose we go back on that statement and say 'well actually, the creators of new characters', which still doesn't make sense but let's go with that. Then major plots wouldn't happen. Because Max Allan Collins and Chris Warner created Jason Todd but Judd Winick is the one who brought him back to life. Marv Wolfman and Pat Broderick created Tim Drake but Alan Grant wrote a lot of the Robin comic and Batman comic characterization for him.

It's physically impossible to say that just because other people continued the series, the comics can't be taken seriously.

Comics are the source material. Of which fanfics are based on.

The Star Trek and Star Wars book series are written by multiple different authors but that doesn't mean that what's written doesn't happen or isn't true or is wrong. The 39 Clues and Doctor Who series are the same deal.

Batman comics are canon. Because if only the works of the original authors of Batman were to be considered canon, then practically everyone in the Batman universe doesn't exist/doesn't matter. Because they're just fanfic then.

But this idea doesn't just stop at the Batman fandom anymore because every comic was written this way. The people in Superfam? Gone. Flashfam? Gone. Arrowfam? Gone. Like this logic doesn't just apply to Batman, it applies to virutally every character in the existence of DC.

The beauty of comics is seeing how the next writer will continue the story. Sometimes they're right, sometimes they need tweaking, and sometimes they're wrong although that's usually very rare.

The problem with fandom's view on comic writing is the belief that whatever the authors create must match our perspective of the characters. That's wrong. Their characterization is what we should be adding on/building on to our perspective of the characters. Unless there is something so wrong, something so illogical, that it must be noted because that character has never acted that way before, then we must discard or critisize a comic.

Comics develop. Characters develop. Each writer brings something new and adds a layer of depth to each character they write about. That's how we get new interactions, new relationships, new sides that make each character interesting.

Take the original Dick Grayson comic and his intro to Robin

Detective Comics (1937) Issue #38

Dick originally wanted to go to the police. He had no intention of going after Tony Zucco but Bruce is the one who demands they go after him together by themselves!

I love this version created by Bob Kane and Bill Finger, but I also love the version created by a completely different author where Dick decides to stake out Zucco on his own. Both versions show different sides of him and authors sometimes even choose which one they want to include. Some have gone with this version where Dick tries to go to the police before being interrupted by Bruce and others have gone with the second, more famous version. But neither of them are bad and you can't say that the one where Dick goes after Tony Zucco is fanfiction. It's canon. If it's written in comics, it happened unless there's some disastrous, glaring contradiction.

You have to understand, these comics - especially Dick and Bruce's - are nearly 100 years old. Dick, and it's wild to think about this, existed before even the Justice League did. Wonder Woman, Green Arrow, and Aquaman were all created after him. If the orginial writers stopped writing, and noone picked it up, there would be no Justice League and that's a problem because the Justice League is one of the foundations of the DC comics.

So much has changed in a century and new writers constantly come in to show that change. That's why comics after the original writers finish writing are still canon and important. The original characterizations of all these major players were all super peppy and cheerful before new writers added angst and drama to their backstories. Bruce and Dick used to laugh and grin when they went crime fighting with no sadness or anger or other emotions. It wasn't until a couple decades later where writers started writing that in which is how we get the grim avenger Batman today.

Here's the third point to why they're relevant even though they're written by new authors: the passage of time in real life, is included in canon comics characterizations.

One comic talks about Dick discussing the Joker and he says, "at the beginning, it was just all fun and games. He would cause problems but at the end of the day it was a game. But one day, things went too far. People got shot. That day, the Joker changed. He was darker and evil. It wasn't games anymore."

This comic panel talks about the Golden Age to now, the progression and development of characters.

The comics and reality are inseparable because reality is literally written in. The works of writers after the orignal ones aren't arbitrary or some whimsical thing.

It's very different from fanfiction because fanfiction has no need to stick to the truth or canon characterization but these comic writers do because they have an obligation to do so. The only problem they might have is accidentally focusing too much on one aspect of a character and neglecting the other parts but almost none of them are way off the mark.

So no, for the sake of characterization, personality development, plot events, and new interactions, all comics are extremely important and definitely canon. Us readers might have different opinions and thoughts on them but it's irrelevant in the face of the fact that the comics are the only truth to which we can base our interpretations on.

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gffa · 7 months

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i was talking to a friend last night about anakin kind of being born of the force, but they told me that in one book this was done by darth plagueis in the manner that palpatine describes in the opera scene. is this actually true and canon or just in legends, cause either way is definitely something

*laughs* All right when I say "ohhhhhh boy", I promise it it is with as much good humor as I can inject into it, but this is running into something that's a much thornier issue than a lot of people want to untangle, though, I see you are probably at least near the same page as I am: That the Star Wars novels are not deeper canon lore than the movies and TV series. They are supplementary canon, they are bonus canon that is the first to get retconned away because it's periphery to the main story. When it comes to Star Wars, the novels are not written by George Lucas and he repeatedly, repeatedly said they were not part of his Star Wars. Now, I'm not your or your friend's mom, I'm not telling you what to do or what your Star Wars is! If you want to include the Darth Plagueis novel in your Star Wars canon, that's great! It's not my place to tell you what is or isn't true for you, only that my point is that as nerd fandoms we're so primed to think that books are a deeper source of lore that we often apply the same logic to Star Wars and it's just not true. The books are often amazing, I love using them to supplement my view of Star Wars when they're well done! But the truth is still that the movies and TV series--even in Disney canon, within their continuity, where Legends doesn't apply--are always, always the deepest part of the canon and the books are an optional bonus that are probably never read by the people making the movies and TV series. So, for memory (it's been awhile since I looked at that section), in the Darth Plagueis novel, Palpatine does imply that he and Plagueis manipulated the midi-chlorians to give Anakin life because they were fucking around with them, but you know it's Palpatine, take him with a grain of salt. (There's also the Darth Vader: Dark Lord of the Sith comic where Palpatine is standing over a pregnant Shmi in a vision that a lot of people took as confirmation, but the author specifically came out and said, no, it wasn't confirmation of that theory, she was already pregnant when Palpatine showed up, etc.) The specific bit you mention is indeed Legends, so it's part of the Legends continuity, take that as you will! 😂

#lumi.txt #star wars #sheev palpatine #darth plagueis #meta

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whipped-cheese · 1 month

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FINALLY FINISHED THEM!!

Grrrgrgr it has been a wip for decades-

My fish babies!! Aaaa :D

Esmeray!!

Aaaaaaaaand Sulien!! :]

[click for quality]

Fish Duty au

EEEEEEEE!!! *Confetti!!*

Ramblings of a madman underneath-

-So, originally- just going to make sun- since I drew him in the little comic I made a while back, but then I decided , why not make a moon too

because-

you know-

no sun is complete without their Moon /silly

So rambling rambling rambling time, info dumping mmm

Wanted to distinct them with their own names-

Esmeray! (or just Ray) -(Sun)

Sulien! (or just sully/sul) -(Moon)

Esmeray means dark moon and Sulien means sun born c:

Sometimes I'll forget so if a say sun and moon at some point it translates to Ray or Sul-

-So the same logic as last time applies,

the lighter size of their face and body is damaged/very sensitive, so the eye that's on the lighter side of their face is very very foggy so essentially, they're blind on that side of the face, soooo half blind. Often causing them to bump into fish or other random things in their enclosure sometimes.

-Usually you only see ONE at a time, but NEVER BOTH.

Often leading visitors to assume that there is only one clownfish in the enclosure that transforms or something when it's night, but really, when it's daytime Esmeray is out y'knoww, entertaining, doing tricks, swimming around while Sulien sleeps and when it's night time, Esmeray sleeps and then Sulien is entertaining, or just glowing around, looking pretty.

You never see them both out at the same time, rarely.

Really unless it's something important or it's something special.

Sometimes they'll both cuddle together in their little cove..🥺 on their sea anemone bed

usually in the late evenings 4-5pm before Sulien gets to go out and roam for the night.

(ray can't fall asleep comfortably, without being close to his brother [happening since they were young] so sulien snuggles with ray until ray falls asleep)

-as I said before- later on down the line, when y/n begins working at a janitor at the exotic fish aquarium, our lil fishy frens kinda gets the memo after a while and starts to draw on a little area of sand that's infront of the glass to communicate and y/n started fogging the glass and writing on it to communicate, Ray (sun) doesn't understand words so they both do little drawings instead.

No one really knows where he learnt it from- but Sulien (moon) knows a bit of English, only a few simple words (hello,bye, mad, you, me, us, angry, food, help, feel,etc.) he also uses the sand.

Performance wise, esmeray does lil heart water bubbles, (or really just any shape, kinda like how clowns do balloon animals and other items) it's something he usually does for visitors, kids mostly. He'll wave, bow, press his face against the glass to be funny, do silly faces that makes the kids laugh, even some regulars that really want to become marine biologist, etc. that often visit the aquarium on weekends that he's very very fond of. He does loads of shows and tricks for people when they walk up to his case, very very active lil fella

the clown fish must perform!! :]

Sulien on the other hand, usually comes out when it's night time, so it's quite rare to see him considering he's mostly active during practically closing time- up until opening hours.

When people do have the rare chance of seeing him at the front of one side of their enclosure, he's not really that active in terms of show BUT he will put on a very pretty light show.

It's absolutely mesmerizing.

Those who get to stay and finish watching it atleast-

The guards are pretty avid on getting everyone out of the aquarium at the designated time.

He also sings sometimes, which is extremely extremely rare-

Guards working there for years have probably only ever heard it twice-

I'll be drawing (mostly sketches) more of them for a little<3

Also- before, I'd prefer posting stuff about my other au 'A Bad Teaser au /lust au' somewhere separate because it's slightly,eeeehhh just a touch suggestive- BUT

I'm gonna redraw and start posting stuff about it here.

Sooner or later (very soon- like I have loads of drawings of them but no where to put it, and I wanna share my suggestive whore men /pos /silly )

#Fish duty Au #fnaf daycare attendant #fnaf security breach #sundrop #moondrop #fnaf moodrop #fnaf sun #Clownfish sun #Clownfish moon #aquarium janitor y/n #janitor y/n

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cripplecharacters · 25 days

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Hi! I am working on a story where one of the three protagonist has a burn scar. This character has from the eye to half their right cheek of a burn; this happened around 9 years ago (the character was 10.)

I am working on historical-fantasy setting, I know you guys are not historians but I was hoping you could help me out with ideas.

In my story, there is a few chapters where the characters go to a snowy mountain for a couple of days, and there are temperatures ranging from 20ºF to 10ºF with snow and harsh wind, is there any protection/possible cream needed for the face and the eye for that situation?

Also, around 10% of the story has fights that include armour (including a helmet to protect the face and the head,) would a character with that type of burn may need a special helmet?

Just to clarify, the character for most of the story doesn't have any mask or anything covering their face, except in the moments of battle where every other character is also using a helmet and armour.

Not sure if there is anything potentially problematic in this, but the character got that injury due to a baby dragon of the family accidentally burning his face (this is a society where dragons are like animals and common in the house.) Because it happened so many years ago there isn't any angst feeling or people in his community commenting about, except in a scene where the protagonists are talking about traumatic things and this character mentioned that they remember when it happened his parents were afraid he was not going to make it, not realizing he was hearing it.

There are other background characters with burns, scars and stumps due to the nature of this world, but I am concentrating in this protagonist right now.

Hi!

For weather this cold, your character would need a LOT of moisturizing creams. Possibly a comical amount. They would help to protect the skin from both the wind and cold. Burn scars don't have the natural oils, so his skin would be very dry normally, let alone during the winter. Even in normal temperatures, it's recommended to apply moisture multiple times a day. If something like sunscreen is available to your character, he would use it too (and often). Burns are sensitive to the sun, and some people use it even when it's cloudy. During the winter it's also commonly used because the snow reflects it. (As you said, I'm very much not a historian and I don't know what would work as non-modern equivalents... I assume that shea butter or olive oils could be on the table here? Certainly better than nothing. Or even just Magical Herb Mixture, if it's fantasy.)

As for the eye protection, I would say that most people in 20ºF to 10ºF (-6ºC to -12ºC) would need it, especially if it's both snowing and windy lol. I have experienced those temperatures and it can be hard to see even without extremely sensitive skin/eyes. But generally yes, harsh wind could be actively painful to someone with a burn scar. If it's too hard on him, he could wear some very loose cloth to cover it (prime example of a scenario where a face covering makes medical and just logical sense). It shouldn't be tight; maybe just a large hood or veil that would still be away from that part of their face.

Note: it could also not be painful at all. Burns come with nerve damage, and sometimes nerves make non-painful stimuli hurt really bad, and sometimes they make it so a person doesn't feel pain when they should. If your character is the second, they would bear it better at the time but still have all the other issues - skin breakdown, contraction, cracking, itching.

Not sure what other kind of eye protection would be available, but even regular glasses would help with the "not getting blasted with wind and snow" part. Make sure that with the protection he wears, it doesn't touch the scar directly. That can be extremely painful and cause skin to break in that kind of environment, especially if he's not a regular at the Snowy Mountain. If they are, they will handle it much better - scars get more or less desensitized with repetitive exposure.

For a helmet, I think having it padded from the inside would be a good idea. Preferably with something relatively smooth (maybe cloth or fur?) so that it doesn't scratch the burn. Potentially something to "stabilize" it (maybe their helmet could be custom-made for their exact head size?) so that it doesn't hit his scar over and over too if it's too large. I appreciate that others characters wear helmets too, and that he does for only a minor part of the story :-) (smile emoji))

The backstory scenario sounds fine to me as well! House pet trying to play and causing an injury is definitely a thing when it comes to facial differences haha. I can imagine that it would be even more common if the pet in question is a dragon and not a regular dog.

Having multiple burn survivors in a world with fire-breathing creatures that live in human homes is a nice element of worldbuilding :) (smile emoji)! I think that if this kind of thing happens often, then some of the resources I mentioned (moisturizes, sunblock) would be more readily available for your main character and people in similar sets of circumstances.

Thank you for your ask, I hope it helped a bit!

Mod Sasza

#anonymous #mod sasza #face difference #writing guide #writing advice #writing resources #writing tips #writing disabled characters #burn survivor representation #historical fiction

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sandinmybed · 9 months

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big ramble about mike's love languages and how that relates to his relationships with will and el ahead!

its just occurred to me that in s3, during lucas and mike's little "how to apologise to a girl when you're gay and dont have any instincts in a straight relationship" crash course, the one thing mike did actually understand as relationship advice from lucas was "girls like presents." that's the thing he focused on the most, which was a great segue into a silly montage of lucas, mike and a very fed-up will running around the mall trying to buy gifts for the girls.

however, el doesn't give a damn about presents, not really. she doesn't really react to the flowers he gives her in s4 - she cares more about the note and what it says (and what it says does not please her.) el's love language appears to be words - she keeps mike's letters, and she's acutely aware of what they all say. she needs mike to *say* that he loves her - him showing how much he cares is not enough for el. so mike focusing on giving her presents was never going to work. his way of showing affection/love is not what she naturally recognises.

but yknow who does canonically like presents?

this boi.

continued under the cut because this got long:

the only advice mike's able to take from lucas' girlfriend apology training speedrun is the one that applies to him. mike's love language is receiving gifts. this isn't a "mike's so selfish" dunk post because hes literally thirteen and it makes sense to him that if he likes presents, el must like presents too. everyone likes presents, right? but it just further shows the disconnect between them. they can't recognise what the other person needs. (side note, el never gives him any presents or compliments him during the course of their relationship if i recall. mike isn't receiving love in a way he understands either.)

when mike fucks up with el, he needs a training course from lucas on how to fix it and he still doesn't understand what's going on (and lets not forget mike is smart as fuck, he should logically be able to work this out.) then, like four hours later chronologically, he fucks up with will. he visibly realises he's fucked up as soon as he says the infamous INMFYDLG line and without anyone telling him to, he travels miles in the pouring rain to fix it. notably, with words. will is also not interested in presents. mike isnt often (maybe ever?) shown giving him a present, but he gives will plenty of heartfelt words and verbally appreciates will. in season 4, he fights with will and el on the same day AGAIN, and what does he do? he brings el a plate of eggos, which she rejects by not touching them. they fight more, "a fight you can't come back from." and then later, his apology to will - he doesn't bring any gifts or peace offerings, he just calmly talks to him and apologises sincerely. and it works perfectly - they're back to sharing their feelings with each other and being best friends. the tension in their relationship is basically gone after that.

on a related note, let's look at what will and el do when they first see mike after a year, mike! six months. el plans a whole day together, doing all this crazy fun stuff like breakfast burritos and rollerskating, and mike goes with it but his response is noticeably a little confused. think about mike as a character - he's nerdy, a little awkward, he likes comic books, video games, movies, and stories. he's got his close friends but he's not really a social butterfly. he'd probably be just as happy to go home and watch movies together and hang out, rather than meet a bunch of el's "friends." it all goes to shit, as we know, which is neither el nor mike's fault, but it does.

will brings the painting to their reunion. will has been working on this painting for like a week, probably. he's poured tons of effort and time into it. he obviously doesn't get a chance to give it to him until the van, but when he does?

mike loves it.

that awestruck smile - this is for him and will made it. and we know mike particularly likes receiving will's art, he's been shown to have more of it on his walls than even joyce does. this is also why mike is so confused - these tags perfectly describe why mike is so messed up about the painting, imo. he likes gifts, and brings one for el, but el doesnt give him one back. but then will does, and he loves it, but will says its from el.

but this also explains why after the painting reveal, mike looks a little bit like he might know something's up.

gift giving/receiving and words of affirmation are the love languages that mike understands best, remember. so will byers, visibly emotional, has just given him an epic speech about how great "el" thinks he is, while presenting him with a handmade gift that's perfectly thought out for mike's interests that he poured hours of work into. let's not forget mike is very intelligent. i dont think he's fully oblivious like fandom thinks he is - when it comes to mike wheeler feeling appreciated, will has absolutely nailed it, and that's his downfall when it comes to hiding his feelings. he's too good at knowing what makes mike feel loved. so now mike's got to deal with will's perfectly adapted tokens of love and how instinctually easy he finds it to please will, vs his girlfriend, who never really makes him feel appreciated, and his own inability to make her feel appreciated

#mike wheeler analysis #mike wheeler #byler #byler analysis #anti mlvn #mike's love language is gift receiving #stranger things analysis #mike wheeler i know what you are

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crucipuzzled · 1 year

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About Loid Forger's therapy in SxF manga chapter 77 (Spoilers ahead)

There's a Freudian text for everything. Today's all about The Question of Lay Analysis (1926), also known as Wild Analysis.

Endo did what I have been planning to do for a comic of my own: depict Loid actually working as a Psychiatrist. While I'm glad he took this path, sadly I can't say he did a good job on it.

As some of you know, I'm a therapist grounded in Psychoanalitic Theory. Yes, I like Freud and Lacan, and no, Oedipus Complex is not what you heard it is. I did a brief analysis of Psychiatry stuff in SxF in the past, and today I feel compelled to repeat that exercise.

Let's go in order.

1. The importance of being a third party

What's the reason for which people ask a therapist for help, and not their families or friends? What do we have that they don't?

The answer is pretty simple: neutrality. We don't have a side other than rationality and ethics. A good therapist should be able to listen to his patient without losing objectivity.

When you and your patient have a shared, unique shared experience, it's preferable, even ethical, to refer him to another therapist, in order to preserve the higher interest of the patient. The more neutrality you can muster, the better for the curing process. Otherwise, it's really hard to listen to someone else without being constantly reminded of yourself. It turns into a blind spot.

Now, there are exceptions to this rule, but you must handle them carefully, and always putting the patient at the center. Loid openly talking here about how close he is to the hijacking incident doesn't help much.

In short, you have to ensure that your position in the therapeutic process remains an impartial, neutral Other, and avoid becoming a fellow. It's good to create trust, but not too much, just enough to work.

2. Chronic condition (?)

The biggest difference between a Psychiatrist and a Psychologist is that the first went to Med School. Hence, chronicity is a term that applies mostly for organic conditions, but it's rare in the field of subjectivity.

In my short experience, I've met cases labeled as "chronic depression" being cured. I, myself, cured a case of "compulsive suicide attempts since 15 years old, chronic depression, started hearing evil voices 2 weeks ago". You might think that I'm a great therapist, but it's not the case; it's just that, in order to tackle subjective problems, you ought to go to the root of the symptoms and deal with the subjectivity you find there. Psychoanalitic therapy has proven to be wonderful to treat many conditions that didn't get a cure in other types of psychotherapy.

Of course, it's not a panacea. There are things that we can't figure out yet. But bear in mind that chronicity, in the field of the mind, is more complex than just the passage of time and only a bunch of mental conditions truly admit it.

Jacques Lacan, the most important psychoanalist after Freud, said that the unconscious's track of time is not chronological, but logical. You don't just jump out of adolescence because you turned 18; other things need to happen for you to finally feel like an adult. It's a logical progression. The same can be said about some "chronic" conditions.

3. Explicit Reason of Consultation vs Latent Reason of Consultation

A.K.A Everybody lies.

Psychotherapy is a really weird thing to learn and master. In Psychology School they teach you that you must trust what your patient tells you, but at the same time, distrust him enough. How to conceal both things?

Well, everything is easier when you take Dr. House's words to heart.

Everyone states a reason for consultation, but that first reason is never the real reason, no matter how reasonable it might sound. The trick to discern what the latent, real reason for consultation is, is to determine what the subjective conflict hiding in plain sight is. Sometimes there isn't any and therefore, a full psychotherapy is not necessary (maybe just assisting someone with some things, being there just in case, etc), but most cases are built upon a conflict.

I'm glad that Loid here decided to act like a good Psychiatrist and took a mental note on the oddities.

WELL SAID MY BOY, I'M PROUD OF YOU

I want to remark this, because it's discouraging how many therapists oversee this to simplify their job to an extreme. Believe it or not, there are therapists out there that act upon what their patients tell them first. "Hi doc. I came here today because I got an accident and I think I have PTSD". "Ok, I'll have you practice these mindfulness excercises and you should be ok within a month, see ya". DUDE.

4. The place of truth in the context of Psychotherapy

Ah, the classic temptation of knowing the 'real' truth. Is this patient in front of me bullshitting his way out? Is he in a delirium? Is she telling the truth, or just embellishing her story to make it more believable?

You don't have this struggle once you are certain of your role as a psychotherapist. And your role is to help your patients to deal with their subjective struggles.

In short: Psychoterapy deals with the patient's truth, not with the 'real' truth.

You know who deals with 'real' truth in the field of Mental Health? Social Workers.

We psychotherapists don't need to ascertain our patient's claims. Confronting them with reality usually proves to be fruitless, just like Loid did here ("But you're a respected educator!"). It's way more useful to open the topic by asking more questions such as "How did you reach that conclussion?" "What made you think that way?", or giving a specular answer ("You speak like someone else said that about you", "You're too hard with yourself. Where does that come from?", "It sounds like you're belittling your fear for what your wife could say", etc etc etc).

Whenever you're with a neurotic patient, their own personal truth is the only truth you need to work with. Leave the 'real' truth for people who actually needs it, like Social Workers, Doctors or Judges. Your role with a patient is to make sure that his personal truth can turn into something less painful. No need to talk with their friends and family for info, unless your patient is a child or a teenager; just ask him and stick to what he says word by word.

There's a huge topic about the place of reality in therapy, specially in the field of Psychoanalysis, but if I start this train of thought I'm afraid I'll go down to Hell. If you're interested, I've reblogged some Lacanian pills on this Tumblr, check them out by searching the tag #lacan.

PS: NO LOID, DON'T DO THAT. DON'T BREAK THE TRUST YOU ACHIEVED WITH MR AUSTIN! CONFIDENTIALITY IS A MUST!!

5. Counceling = Psychotherapy?

Loid is a (fake) Psychiatrist, not a psychotherapist, so I can't be too hard on him. Also I stan this man. I'm painfully well aware that councelling and coaching is an alternative to psychotherapy in other parts of the world, mostly in the US. But let's not forget one thing:

Psychotherapists DON'T GIVE ADVICES.

At least, not the ones that take this job seriously.

Everyone can give advices. Do you want an advice? Ask your family or friends, or post something in social media, or ask a complete stranger in the street what to do. You'll get plenty of answers and advices. Maybe a bunch of them will be really useful. Good!

The thing with advices is that: -They act like a universal recipe for a problem -There's no universal recipe to sort a problem -They don't tackle the subjective root of a problem -They assume that the problem can be solved by something you can do upon your surroundings, when the real struggle stems from subjective problems Some advices do help with real struggles, but when you have a subjective conflict, they barely help; hell, sometimes they make everything worse.

Like Loid here.

Remember when I mentioned that the unconscious mind's track of time is not chronological, but logical? This is a great example. Mr Austin won't be able to properly talk with his wife just because Loid adviced him to; he must solve other issues before that.

I'm glad we're on the same page on this one

6. Your therapist is not your friend

Sad but true.

If your therapist is good enough, you won't know many things about his private life. You won't know about his lover, his hobbies, where does he live, what does he fear.

Why the secretism? Because it's useless for the patient. Also because disclosing personal information has the effect of becoming a model for the patient, who would start to imitate you. And finally, because you need to mantain a semblance of neutrality and not getting emotionally close with the patient more than necessary.

PS: It's kinda cute how aware Loid is about Yor's every movement. Kinda. KISS HER ALREADY, GODDAMNIT

7. Talking cure and (how not to use) the divan

I talked a bit about divans here.

There, I mentioned that you should NEVER PUT A PSYCHOTIC PATIENT IN A DIVAN. NOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPE. Well, we can amplify this rule a bit and say that you should avoid the divan with any patient that has a risk of getting seriously upset, like in severe trauma.

The divan is not the only thing that could play against you if badly used. There are cases in Psychiatric Hospitals of patients getting upset because their therapists used the same clothes and hairstyle every single day for months. The point here is that, with psychotic patients and fragile psychic structures (like what happens in traumatized people), you can't use methods that require too much projection.

Also, Lottie here is not performing a Talking Cure.

The divan has been used since Freud to facilitate transference through the Free Association Method. You lay down on it and your therapist ask for whatever crosses your mind first. You don't put a content there beforehand.

(On the same line, if you're a therapist, please refrain from decorating your consultation room with motivational phrases. You're putting words in your patient's mouth before he even starts to speak)

So, it's useless to make Mr Austin lay down on a divan, only to ask him to remember a specific memory. I'd advice (Ha! The irony!) against using the divan here.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------- To finish my Two Cents, I'd like to point some positive aspects of this chapter. It's nice that a troubled person decides to seek for help. There's still a huge stigma about men requiring mental health help, and it's a nice example to settle to portray one actually going to a Psychiatrist. Men usually struggle with their problems alone and they have it rough.

It's also nice that, in the end, Loid could help his patient. I wonder how (How?!), but it probably means that, at some point of the process, he changed his methods for the better.

And yes. Sometimes, helping one single person can change many lives. I'm honored to be able to attest to that :D

As everyone, I'd expect the logical sucession of events that could follow this chapter: Loid realizing he's got a heck of a wife compared to other marriages, appreciating Yor more, and giving us heavy smut cute TwiYor moments. But Endo has proven to be an author that doesn't like to follow logic. So, let's brace for whatever will come in two weeks.

Thank you for reading!

#spy x family #loid forger #psychiatry #psychoanalysis #sigmund freud #jacques lacan #psychotherapy #spy x family manga #sxf

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genericpuff · 2 months

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hello! i'm not sure if you remember me, a while ago i asked about digital art and if it's possible to do on an ipad or something similar. i was really grateful for your response and i got an ipad over christmas! i didn't realize how expensive the pencils were though and was only able to get one recently. now that i have all of that, i download the first art program i saw (ibispaint x, i don't know how good that is) and feel super overwhelmed by everything, all the tools and brushes and i have no idea where to begin. i know this is a super broad topic, but i don't know if you have any advice for a beginner hoping to become a digital artist? or know of any resources? thank you so much in advance and no worries if this topic is too broad to really get into properly!

Oh hey!! Congrats on getting an iPad! And yeah, shopping for the pens is a big pain in the butt, but I'm glad you finally got it all setup!

So most of the advice I'm gonna give you is very basic, starter advice that can apply to virtually any digital art software, as the vast majority of them are built with the exact same base tools, they just vary in their intended purposes which means they may differ in more advanced settings and what they offer beyond the basics (ex. Photoshop has more colors than Clip Studio because it's built for editing high quality photos whereas Clip Studio is meant to emulate comic art, but Clip Studio offers more in the way of comic-creating tools such as specialized rulers, 3D material support, built-in screentoning, etc. and all of the software available will tend to have different brush engines, meaning it doesn't always 'feel' the same to draw in one software as it does in another).

Your bestest friends:

Layers! This is the biggest pro to going digital, because now you can work with layers! So anything you draw on each layer is preserved and can't touch or affect whatever's on the other ones :3 You can find the layers tab in Ibis Paint X in the bottom right, don't be afraid to make a bunch of them and mess around with what you can do. Play around with the different blending mode settings (in Ibis Paint it's the menu that's labelled 'Normal' in the layers popup) especially Multiply, Color Dodge, and Overlay, as those three are the most commonly used to make coloring more efficient and give your art some extra pop.

Lasso/marquee/magic wand tools! These are basic selection tools that allow you to select an area within the layer you're working on, so that whatever you paint won't travel outside of that area. The Lasso is a free draw tool, the marquee tool is typically 4 sides by default (so squares/rectangles) and the magic wand detects and selects a closed area with one click! (just note that by default it's only on the layer you're on, so if you use it on a layer that has nothing, it will typically select the entire canvas).

Alpha locking! This is a simple button setting you can click to 'lock' the layer you're working on, which basically means that whatever you've drawn on that layer, anything you add can't travel outside of that drawing. So if you want to quickly shade something without going outside the lines, alpha locking is your solution!

Clipping groups/layers! This is a bit more advanced but is basically an even better version of alpha locking that you can use in conjunction with it. Clipping layers are basically additional layers that , when you click the 'clipping group' button, 'attaches' that new layer to the layer that's below it. It performs the same function as the alpha lock by preventing whatever you draw on that layer from travelling outside of it, HOWEVER it comes with the added benefit that it's on an entirely different layer, meaning you can erase and mess with whatever's on that new layer as much as you like and it won't hurt the base layer. It kinda follows the same logic as animation cels !

Masking! Y'know when you're doing a traditional painting, and you put down tape to cover the area so you can paint over it and later remove the tape and everything underneath is untouched? That's basically what masking is! Once you put down a layer mask, using the erase tool on it will 'erase' whatever the mask is applied to, and using the brush will make it magically return! This may sound silly at first, but I find masking is especially helpful if you want to erase something on the layer you're working on without it disappearing forever! It's also really helpful for comic work because you can mask whatever's outside of the panels and voila, nothing you draw will travel outside of those panels!

Stabilization! I don't know how extensive Ibis Paint X is with offering stabilization tools, but many digital art software comes with it and it's a LIFE SAVER for new digital artists adjusting to the feel of digital art. It essentially 'slows down' the output of the ink on the canvas which helps a lot with getting cleaner lines in fewer tries. It's not quite as big of a deal when drawing on iPads because obviously you have more control by default by drawing directly on the screen, but it can still be really helpful when you need to pace your hand ahead of the actual drawing tool to pull cleaner lines!

That's pretty much all I can think of for now! But here are some other commonly asked questions:

1.) There are so many brushes to choose from, which one do I use?

The round brush is small but mighty. Virtually anything can be painted with it, it's simple, but malleable, especially when you start messing around with the hardness and opacity settings. Don't get too lost in the sauce with the brushes that are available to you, it can be very easy to get overwhelmed by all the options and variety. Some artists still work purely with just round brushes, some artists have custom brushes they like to use to speed up their drawing process or achieve certain textures. Play around with them, but don't get too stressed about which one you use because there's no wrong answer, the right brush to use is the one that gets the job done ! <3

2.) What canvas size should I use?

It depends on a variety of factors such as whether or not you're planning to print, where you're going to be posting it, etc. By default I like to work on 8.5 x 11 inch canvases (standard printer paper size) at 350 dpi, which if you want to make that canvas in Ibis Paint X, means you just have to make a canvas with a pixel ratio of 2975 x 3850 pixels! Just note that the lower you go in either pixel count or dpi, the lower the resolution, so it's typically encouraged you work at a minimum of 300 dpi (but you usually don't have to go any higher than 600) to ensure you don't wind up with any blurry low res JPG's/PNG's.

3.) Should I export my final drawing as JPG or PNG?

This is usually just up to personal preference, but like the canvas size, it depends on what you're using the image for. You can always export as both, the biggest difference between them is that PNG is lossless meaning you won't experience image compression like you will with JPG, BUT you're also going to have much larger image sizes. JPG is often fine for any standard posting, PNG is typically recommended if you want to have a drawing with a transparent background for printing (as JPG can't do transparent backgrounds) or if you just want to have a really high res image file for sharing outside of social media sites (as social media sites like FB/IG/etc. will typically compress the hell out of your images anyways)

Here are some other super helpful resources as well if you need some visual and/or audio guides:

Sinix Design - How to Learn Digital Painting (Beginners)

Marc Brunet - The Beginner's Guide to Digital Art

Skynix Art - 50 Digital Art Tips in 5 Minutes

One thing I also like to do is watch speedpaints of digital artists as it can really help pull back the curtain on what they're doing (or at least, it can help you see what they start with which can help you better picture the process of turning a blank canvas into a finished work of art!) And though I don't do it as often, if there's an artist whose work I REALLY like, I'll try and find their actual work files (many bigger artists sell them on their crowdfunding sites/Gumroad/etc.) so that I can actually break the drawings apart layer by layer for the purpose of analysis. Of course, all that is something that you'll grasp better over time as you learn the tools and learn to recognize what artists are doing in their own workflow, so don't worry if you don't glean a whole lot of info from the "big guys" right away, you should always be referencing artists who are higher along the skill ceiling from you but not too high that they're using techniques and tools that are outside of your realm of understanding.

Other than that, just try to have fun, don't stress too much about it, and save often!!! Part of creating art is learning to be at peace with the process, so don't stress too much if it takes you a while to get adjusted to the layouts and tools - at the end of the day, digital art is another medium entirely, so it's not uncommon at all for traditional artists to need a lot of practice to 'switch' to digital, because they both utilize different tools and techniques. Be patient with yourself, always be on the hunt for new resources and guides and references, and don't be afraid to experiment and make mistakes (the best part about digital art? Mistakes don't cost you any paint or materials!)

Good luck!! And congrats again! 🥰

#ask me anything #anon ama #anon ask me anything #ama #digital art #digital art advice #art advice

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onehundredandeleventropicalfish · 1 year

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Dream has a nasty habit of giving advice and not taking it himself:

He tells Orpheus to grieve for Euridice(I'm not sure if I spelled that right) and then get over the loss, but he never got over Orpheus' death;

He tells Hob that taking away someone's free will is dishonorable. Yet he imprisons Nada and unmakes Gault for defying him;

He warns the fox lady against revenge but he wastes his precious energy on trapping Alex's mind in a nightmare after he gets freed.

He's such a bastard and I love him

He loves and cares so deeply for everyone, yet he's petty and spiteful. He never stops loving yet he can be so cruel to those he cares about

I don't remember where but I read this somewhere about Dream: "he can love without forgiveness and forgive without love" and I think that sums up Dream pretty nicely. He's full of contradictions and that's what makes me love him as a character so much

you know, ironically, while it's absolutely true that dream can be hypocritical, you're definitely not wrong, those first two actually aren't, as far as he sees the world

because the thing that hurts dream the most is that he cannot see himself as a living being - he is endless, he has a purpose, that's the extent of his existence

and therefore he doesn't dream, doesn't have a story, shouldn't want things for himself

and this is why he causes his own tragedy, because he is a person and he does need the things that make up someone's life, but he refuses to believe so

so when he's talking to orpheus, the important part here is "you are mortal, it is the mortal way"

dream would benefit greatly from being allowed to mourn orpheus, but he can't, he has a job to do, and allowing himself to grieve would interfere with his purpose. so he has no choice, he has to bury it

"so live" only applies to orpheus, as far as dream's concerned, because he doesn't think the endless live

gault falls under the exact same logic. dream sees his creations as extensions of him and is always surprised when they go beyond that. and if he's not allowed a life of his own, if he has to spend eternity fulfilling his purpose as it was given to him, they do too. they're not mortal, they don't live, and thus they don't have free will

(i'm honestly super curious to see what happens in the show from here because gault didn't exist in the comics, and dream actually acknowledging she was right is a major step forward that comic dream never managed to make)

and nada had free will

she just didn't think she did

that's how hell (or any afterlife) works, in the sandman universe, there is no being that judges it. death doesn't decide where you go, and neither does anyone else. you go where you believe you should

which is what makes sure people get to the right afterlife for their particular religion, but also it means that everyone in hell believes they deserve to be there

dream may have put her there, but he didn't have the power to keep her there. when she says "only your forgiveness can free me", that doesn't mean dream has to formally pardon her, it means she can only leave when she stops feeling like she was in the wrong here. and a part of her hates him for this, but a part of her is also stuck feeling guilty, and that's what's keeping her in hell. it's still a shitty move on dream's part, don't get me wrong, but when he said that to hob he was not currently doing anything to prevent her free will. had she truly decided what dream did was unfair, she could have left

revenge, however, that's where you're absolutely right. dream knows, on so many levels, that revenge causes more problems than it solves, and yet this is the one indulgence into human feelings he actually allows himself

he tells the fox not to, he tells hob revenge is a bad idea, he's constantly explaining to people he cares about not to take revenge because it will get them hurt. he is the prince of stories, and he knows how revenge stories end

(destruction even says he was disappointed that dream is still viewing everyone as stories, he'd hoped one day dream would realise people are people)

dream, though. dream doesn't have a story, so who says his revenge has to end in tragedy? he pushes down all his emotions for the sake of the world but anger doesn't want to leave, anger is good at convincing you it deserves to stay, anger can be righteous

if everyone else is just a story, well, the end is that they get what's coming to them. they deserve to be punished for hurting the people dream cares about, and who better to ensure the end of the story than him?

(and he doesn't realise how much his own emotions are influencing those decisions. he thinks he's being rational. he's not. what you were saying about him being both loving and spiteful always makes me think of orpheus - he loved his son more than anything in the world, he was a genuinely good dad and he did everything in his power to keep orpheus from tragedy. but then when orpheus ignored him and got hurt anyway, dream couldn't help but be angry at orpheus for causing their entire family so much pain, and that's why he walked away)

all the endless have different ways in which they see themselves in comparison to mortal beings. the more emotionally healthy ones realise that there's very little difference between the two. and then you get desire who explicitly admitted (in internal narration) that their entire sanity is hinging on believing that they are in control of the universe, they physically can't believe dream when he says they serve humanity and not the other way around. and dream, who sees everything and everyone as a story, except himself

he's not a living being, he doesn't follow their rules. he's not playing the game, he's the referee

except that's not and never was true

and that is the root of all of dream's problems

#sandman comic spoilers #dream of the endless #the sandman #ask #meta #mine #orpheus #nada

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mayflowers515 · 1 month

Text

(Wholesome Cartoon AU) Smiling Critters' Families

Wanted to make this to go more into depth with the Critters' families and their thoughts on them. I mentioned some aspects about some families already in my lore headcanons, but here the information relating to them will be more organized and may have some extra details not brought up before.

Note: For the purposes of cartoon logic, real-life lifespans of animals won't apply here when it comes to the parents (since their ages are definitely beyond what ages they typically live by-)

I also have headcanons for all the families, and I will update this if I think up more for them :)

🧡☀️DogDay☀️🧡

Members:

NoonHound - father; 32 years old

Bio: Works as a cartoonist and is very passionate and easygoing.

DandieDawn - mother; 31 years old

Bio: Works as a daycare teacher; she is very caring but a bit of a worrywart.

DogDay - older brother; 11 years old

SunnySpot - younger sister; 6 years old

Bio: Filled with endless curiosity and bubbly charm, but can be a smart allec sometimes.

DogDay loves his parents a lot and respects all of what they do for him and his sister. He only wishes they could all spend more time all together. That doesn't happen too often due to his mother and father working busy jobs. As for DogDay's relationship with Sunny, he cares a lot about her, too. Sometimes, he can get a bit too overprotective of her in cases where it may not be needed. Even then, he likes to play games with her whenever she asks about it. She's very playful after all.

DogDay's parents, Noon and Dawn, work a lot to care for him and Sunny. They used to all live in a more drab town where the job quality wasn't the best. They stayed there to improve their financial situation until finally they could move to a better town to work better jobs. Though they can still be busy at times, the parents now have much more initiative to take a break compared to before. As for Sunny, she really looks up to and admires her brother. Though she gets annoyed whenever he overly coddles her, and she occasionally plays smart with him.

Headcanons:

Sunny has learned how to solve a Rubik's cube at a young age. In general she is good with completing brain puzzles, but solving a Rubik's cube is her favorite one.

Dawn's experiences as a teacher is part of the reason for being a worrywart. Due to the way the kids at daycare act, she tends to have this persona of her slip whenever she tends to DogDay and Sunny. She is often out of work very exhausted and tense, but she still loves her job.

As a kid, Noon drew cartoons as he has always wanted to be a cartoonist. However, he doesn't really like looking back at them since he views them as "cringy". If his kids were to see the comics he created, he would laugh at them as a way of acknowledging how "cringy" his previous work was, even if this may not have been the case.

Dawn and Noon have known each other for a long time, as they were next-door neighbors in their childhood town (not the same as the drab town I described, though). They were childhood friends for a long time, but Noon had harbored feelings for Dawn for a long time even before they got together. By the time their high school's prom came around, he confessed his feelings for her, which she reciprocated (turns out she felt the same way Noon did, but he was oblivious to this thinking she was just being shy originally).

Dawn's hobby whenever she isn't working is landscape work. This ranges from gardening to decorating. She gets really into it, too, often taking a long time to finish her landscaping work to fit a certain occasion (especially the case when holidays roll around). Noon likes to help with decorations sometimes because of his own passions relating to drawing.

DogDay's appreciation of his father's drawings is also what makes him so interested of other people's art, even though he himself isn't as artistic of a person.

🩷🍎PickyPiggy🍎🩷

(I'm changing my mind about the status of Picky's parents. They never disappeared now- I didn't like the original idea I had for them looking back at it; may put what I planned for them previously in another timeline though, but I'm not sure atm)

Members:

PerfectPiggy - father; 36 years old

Bio: The main cook of the family's kitchen; has good leadership skills and charisma.

PetitePiggy - mother; 34 years old

Bio: The co-cook and gardener of the family's kitchen; not afraid to get messy and is hard-working.

PickyPiggy - older sister; 10 years old

PerkyPiggy - younger twin sister; middle; 7 years old

Bio: Takes a lot after her mother and loves outdoor activity. She and her twin brother commonly bicker.

PowerPiggy - younger twin brother; middle; 7 years old

Bio: Though very reserved, he is stubborn and goal-oriented. He and his twin sister commonly bicker.

PlayPiggy - baby brother; youngest; 6 months old

Bio: A very happy infant who loves to play games.

Picky has a lot of respect for her parents. They were the reason she has such a passion in gardening and especially cooking. As a result, Picky is a bit closer with Perfect than Petite, but she is always enthusiastic at both learning new recipes and growing new crops. She has learned a lot about responsibility and discipline from them that reflects in the piggy she is. Picky has a motherly attitude towards her siblings. Whenever her parents can't take care of them due to being busy, Picky usually volunteers to help. She is a peacemaker to her siblings if Perky and Power get into fights or whenever Play starts to get upset. She also caters a lot to their basic needs. She doesn't deny any of them for any reason, though she can sometimes act slightly mean and sarcastic towards them depending on her mood. She usually apologizes when she goes too far with this attitude, however.

Picky's parents love all of their children equally. In the case of Picky, they are especially happy that she takes interest in their work. They secretly want Picky to help run the business with them when she's older, and potentially even inherit it if and when they retire. As for Picky's siblings, they have a lot of respect for their older sister. Especially because of what she does to make sure they get taken care of whenever their parents can't help for whatever reason. Perky and Power usually have Picky play with them when she can because she can also let loose and play with them just like any sister can. Though not much is known with how Play feels about Picky due to being so young, he appreciates her company just as much as everyone else's. He especially loves the games she plays with him.

Headcanons:

Before their start as a local restaurant business, the Piggies took their food service slow. They helped out in any food drives and potlucks they came across. Their favorite place to help out is in homeless shelters and orphanages. Picky especially likes to help out in the orphanage (I imagine this is how she and Bobby met all that time ago).

Both Perfect and Petite were into cooking, and they naturally took interest in each other when realizing during high school that they both planned to go to culinary school. During their time in culinary school, they fell in love and eventually became a couple.

Perky and Power aren't into cooking as much as their older sister or their parents, but they still occasionally help out in the kitchen, especially if it involves their favorite food. They can't help out in the same room, however, since they bicker even in the kitchen.

Perky is VERY messy whenever she helps out in the kitchen. She often has flour and ingredients all over her clothes after helping out. This would annoy Power, who is much less messy in the kitchen.

Whenever Power is in the kitchen, he is very by the book. He does a good job keeping track with the details explained in the cookbooks, but he will question whenever something goes against what he expects would happen.

Perfect sometimes cooks the food he makes for the restaurant business as a surprise for the family. To save money, they usually eat store bought food whenever those surprise days don't happen.

Petite probably has a lot of injuries due to what she has to work with in her garden. She especially hates wasps since they sting her a lot whenever she tends to the garden.

🩵🌈CraftyCorn🌈🩵

Members:

King SpeQuine - father; 41 years old

Bio: A very demanding presence in the kingdom and always strives to receive the best in everything.

Queen PrisMare - mother; 38 years old

Bio: Known to be emotionally distant and no-nonsense. She cares a lot about keeping the kingdom afloat.

(Princess) CraftyCorn - daughter; 11 years old

Crafty's relationship with her parents is... complicated to say the least. While she doesn't hate either of them, she doesn't exactly respect them either. They always talked down to her for interests that didn't relate to royalty and they also talked badly about anybody that didn't share their status, and Crafty disliked that. Despite this, Crafty always tried to please her parents so she could feel accepted by them. She was often talked down to for not fulfilling their expectations. Eventually, Crafty had enough of this and ran away in the middle of the night. She was accompanied by a knight who took pity in her situation. She doesn't like talking about her parents ever since she ran away from them. This is also the reason why she's so sensitive on the topic of her upbringing.

Crafty's parents didn't really love their daughter as a daughter. Rather as someone that could help them with the kingdom's reputation. They always nitpicked her for not fulfilling the visions they wanted for her to be. SpeQuine would especially be more nitpicky with his daughter. PrisMare is the same, but she has a sense of coldness whenever she does the same thing. Mainly because she doesn't know how to show love in the traditional sense, since she was always so focused on her kingdom and her kingdom only. These attitudes caused Crafty to run away. Not much is known about the parents' reaction to Crafty besides the fact they are desperately trying to search for her, unaware of her current location.

Headcanons:

Queen PrisMare actually used to be a big artist as a young girl, but she was bashed for these interests in a similar manner that Crafty was. PrisMare herself doesn't realize her own hypocrisy because there was a point in her life where her family would convince her that art was nothing but a waste of time. She commonly uses those experiences to convince Crafty to do what she and SpeQuine want her to do. Even so, I feel deep down, she would've secretly been proud of Crafty and her artwork, but doesn't show it so she can be a "good example" of "proper royalty".

King SpeQuine grew up in a rich family that spoiled him rotten before getting married to PrisMare. He was always taught that he always deserved the best of the best at all times, even if that realistically couldn't always happen. Due to the way he was raised, if he wasn't getting into a relationship with PrisMare, he would've stayed with his parents and never got a chance to work. His parents didn't care about the severity of running a kingdom at the time. They only cared that their son got with a royal because of the reputation it gives them.

Though they aren't seen or heard of much in the events of the cartoon, there are implications that the finding of their daughter is getting more widespread. These implications would grow more and more as the cartoon goes on (probably during a point where Crafty is going through an arc).

The natures of both PrisMare and SpeQuine also caused them to clash and not have as healthy of a relationship with each other either. They hid this from Crafty as much as they could to set a good example for her.

The only reason the parents got together at all is because PrisMare was pressured by her family to find someone to marry for their kingdom and SpeQuine's parents wanted him to marry a rich lady to upgrade their own status. Both PrisMare and SpeQuine seldom treat each other like married couples typically do. They may have a slight hint of care for each other, but this never extends to true love.

💛⭐KickinChicken⭐💛

Members:

CooperRooster - father; 40 years old

Bio: A social butterfly who likes to live in the moment. Can get too over his head at times, though.

WendyHen - mother; 39 years old

Bio: A sweet but self-conscious hen who wants the best for her family.

StrikinChicken - older brother; 17 years old

Bio: He is generally chill and agreeable. He likes to tease Kickin a lot, but he also likes helping him.

KickinChicken - younger brother; 10 years old

Kickin doesn't show it around others, but he is very clingy to his parents. He is especially clingy towards Cooper since he often spoiled him and his brother ever since they were young. Despite not being as close with Wendy, he still appreciates her a lot and usually tries to help her when she has her episodes of self-doubt. As much as Kickin looks up to both of his parents, however, it doesn't compare to the amount of admiration he has for his brother, Strikin. They have always been really close, and Kickin wants to be as cool as his brother. He worries whenever he feels he can't reach Strikin's level of cool, but Strikin usually reassures him whenever he feels this way.

Kickin's parents care a lot about their son, but they deep down worry a lot about him. He was picked on a lot at a previous school he was at, and they feel Kickin gets a lot of his own hidden self-consciousness from those experiences. As a result, they reassure Kickin that he will always be a star to them. Strikin also feels this way, but he is very close to Kickin. He checks up on him a lot, and he feels bad whenever he feels he couldn't do much to help him with his doubts, even when Kickin is just happy Strikin was there for him at all. Deep down, Strikin worries about how Kickin will feel once he leaves for college...

Headcanons:

Strikin plans to major in engineering once he graduates high school and goes to college.

Cooper used to be in a garage band when he was younger. He still has a rock guitar reminding him of those times. He hopes one of his sons pick up on his skills sometime.

Wendy likes to scrapbook in her free time. She may also have some embarrassing photos of her sons when they were really young. Strikin doesn't really mind, but Kickin would absolutely get embarrassed if his mom ever showed anyone those photos-

Wendy and Cooper had BIG crushes on each other during high school, but neither one of them knew about it.

When they did get together, I imagine it happened in a really funny, coincidental fashion. Like, when they were teens, they took part in a spin-the-bottle game, and Cooper just so happened to land on Wendy, which she was TERRIFIED about at first because she thought she would be way out of Cooper's league yet he still pursued her. They hit it off ever since that night-

Though I wouldn't be able to straight out say it in the AU (since I hc the cartoon was created in the early 90s where rep wasn't exactly normalized yet), it is very much implied that Strikin is gay. Probably what made Kickin himself feel more comfortable about realizing he was bisexual (this would also be implied).

Strikin has a BIG comic book collection with comics he doesn't even read anymore. He plans to give those comics to Kickin once he moves out to college (he doesn't give it to him sooner because he wants to surprise him).

💙💡Bubba Bubbaphant💡💙

Members:

(Ben) Benvolio Bubbaphant - father; 42 years old

Bio: An outgoing, fun-loving elephant who likes seeing the bright side of things.

Bridget Bubbaphant - mother; 43 years old

Bio: A kind, calm elephant who usually likes to reminisce on the past.

Bubba Bubbaphant - son; 11 years old

Bubba cares deeply about his parents, but he hasn't always been so trusting of them. For some time (prior to the series), he thought the relationship he had with his parents was "off", as if they couldn't be his real parents due to how different they are from him (size, color, etc). Eventually he realized the reason why, and he has become much closer to them ever since. He always appreciates how much they support his academic interests, and they always strive for him to achieve the best he can. Bubba likes Benvolio's energy, but he sometimes gets annoyed when he doesn't take certain things seriously. As for Bridget, Bubba admires how calm and wise she is. They also like to reminisce on old memories together.

Bubba's parents care a lot about their son. They originally were concerned for him because he would barely open up to them at a certain point in time. Once they realized why, they took extra time in making sure they valued their son for being himself and that they would always care for him. Benvolio has always made sure to do what he could to cheer up his son whenever he felt hard on himself. Meanwhile, Bridget usually helps Bubba whenever he wants insight on certain decisions he's about to make (he wants to make sure he's doing the right thing).

Headcanons:

The reason Bubba distrusted his parents so much in the past was because of how different their genetics seemed to be. He accidentally slips up on this distrust one time when he had an argument with them. Benvolio and Bridget open up about why this is the case. It turns out they are still his real parents despite how different they seemed. Just their genetics made him turn out to not be as similar to them. This discovery was part of the reason as to why Bubba has become much more inclined to learning new things nowadays. Afterwards, he starts to trust his parents more.

This misunderstanding led to Bubba's own fear of his lack of knowledge on certain things. Benvolio and Bridget are aware of this, and always let him know that there's still a lot for him to learn and that it's normal to not know EVERYTHING. Though this doesn't personally help Bubba very much, he would appreciate the support anyway.

Benvolio was NOT good at school back in the day. However, he would barely ever get any help due to the discrimination on him being so small for an elephant. This is eventually how he met Bridget, who was the only one who would help tutor him (she also had similar problems being rejected for her differences). Though they did clash sometimes, they eventually became high school sweethearts.

Bridget had a lot of achievements for her work in school back in the day, but this wasn't capitalized on as much during the time due to the discrimination following her. They have been given much more recognition as she grew older whenever anyone found out due to their world becoming more accepting of these differences.

The Bubbaphants loved to play board games together. They don't get TOO chaotic, as to them it's all just harmless fun to them. Sometimes, Benvolio likes to be silly about the way he plays and is usually the most dramatic whenever they play.

❤️❤️Bobby BearHug❤️❤️

Members:

Beckett BearHug - adoptive father; 34 years old

Bio: A tough-looking bear who has a bleeding heart on the inside. He has fighting experience.

Barbara BearHug - adoptive mother; 33 years old

Bio: Looks snobby, but she is actually very empathetic and gentle. She is known to have a rbf.

Bobby BearHug - daughter/adopted daughter; 9 years old

Bobby loves her parents a lot. She doesn't see them for their outward flaws, but rather as the parents she wished she was born with a long time ago. The truth is, these aren't her real parents. They adopted her after she was dropped by her real parents who neglected her. Due to her previous experience with those parents, Bobby gets really scared and apologetic if she feels she is being too much with Barbara and Beckett or if she isn't good enough for them. They always give her reassurance that they love her no matter what. Bobby sees them as her real parents because of the love they've given her that she needed all along.

Barbara and Beckett care a lot about their daughter. They always wanted to have a child of their own, but they were unable to for some time. They were glad to have the opportunity to raise Bobby after realizing her situation. As a result of realizing what she went through previously, they take extra care in being as kind and reassuring to her as possible. This is so she can know that they won't leave her or neglect her like her previous parents did. They love Bobby unconditionally as if she was their biological daughter.

Headcanons:

Bobby's biological parents are Homer HoneyComb and Cara HoneyComb. They had Bobby at a young age and at the time, they weren't at all ready to have a child. They kept her anyway due to pressure from both sides of the family, but they seldom gave her any attention outside of the bare minimum. This left Bobby starved for love at a young age, and as a result, she was more clingy to them. Homer and Cara took this clinginess as an opportunity to make her a scapegoat whenever they fought and brush her off as a "nuisance". They also used it as a reason to eventually abandon her. This all happened when Bobby was at the age of 5, and she was placed in an orphanage for some time after this. When she was 7-8 years old, she finally found loving parents in Beckett and Barbara.

Beckett is heavily trained in martial arts. He someday wants to teach this skill to his daughter, but he knows she may not want to do that at this point (she doesn't like to get her hands dirty). Beckett is patient about this aspect of Bobby.

Beckett's side of the family runs a honey farm that is far from the Smiling Critters' hometown. Whenever Beckett visits his parents, he makes sure to bring back honey to share among him, Barbara, and Bobby.

Barbara and Beckett met sometime when Barbara visited Beckett's family's honey farm. They related to each other a lot due to being misunderstood by others, and they eventually fell in love as a result.

Barbara actually works as a teacher at the school the Smiling Critters go to. To avoid bias, however, she agreed to not have Bobby in the same classroom as her. She occasionally checks in on her daughter whenever she is on break to make sure she's okay during the day.

Barbara and Beckett allows Bobby to visit the orphanage sometimes due to her positive experience with the fellow orphans there before getting adopted.

💚⚡Hoppy Hopscotch⚡💚

Members:

Scott Hopscotch - father; 36 years old

Bio: Passionate and a little aggressive. He can have a bad temper at times.

Rebecca Hopscotch - mother; 36 years old

Bio: Excitable and optimistic. She can be pretty reckless outside of parenting decisions.

Harley Hopscotch - older sister; 16 years old

Bio: Reserved and a bit shy, but very protective when it comes to her family's safety.

Hoppy Hopscotch - younger sister; middle; 10 years old

Holly Hopscotch - younger sister; youngest; 4 years old

Bio: She is carefree and imaginative, and her innocence is still very present.

Hoppy respects her parents a lot. They usually encourage her to follow her dreams of being a sports star. In fact, she was inspired to do it because of her mom's role in sports during high school and winning many medals. Hoppy also cares a lot about her sisters, though she wishes they would be more willing to play the kind of games she wants to play. That doesn't happen often since their interests are inclined in different directions. Hoppy would get protective of them if something happened to them.

Hoppy's parents are very happy with their daughters. Specifically for Hoppy, they appreciate the amount of energy she brings to the dynamic. Also happened because of their influence and their own energy. Hoppy's sisters also look up to her in their own right. Though Harley can act very cautious with Hoppy due to how reckless she can be, she appreciates what she does whenever she doesn't feel up to doing things. Holly really looks up to Hoppy despite not being into sports like she is. Holly usually likes piggy backs from her or Harley.

Headcanons:

This family seems to have a habit of cursing. Scott and Rebecca curse often whenever they're mad (mostly for Scott) or feeling intense about something (mostly for Rebecca). Holly and Hoppy usually have to be taken out of the room so they don't pick up on their cursing habits (Harley is the only one allowed to listen). Hoppy listens in anyway, so now she has a habit of occasionally cursing just like her parents. Obviously since the Smiling Critters is intended to be a kids cartoon, the swear words aren't actually heard by the viewers. They're coincidentally and comedically blocked out by something or someone every time. Ironically, Hoppy's parents would get mad if they heard their daughter cursing (secretly a bit proud at the same time, though). She usually tries not to curse in front of them anyway, but she occasionally slips up.

Family game nights are likely very, VERY chaotic with this family... Think like that Odd1sOut Monopoly scene-

Speaking of game nights, imagining this is how Scott and Rebecca met. One time they just had a game night with their high school friends. They basically had a game respects game attitude towards each other and grew very close ever since.

Harley wants to major in English once she makes it to college.

The sweater Hoppy has wrapped around her waist was given to her by Harley as a hand-me-down. Hoppy loved it so much that she has worn it ever since it was given to her. If she were to wear it, it would likely look a bit oversized on her-

Despite Hoppy getting in on the chaos of her parents, she will usually partake in making sure Holly keeps her innocence since she's so young. Basically like a "No! Not the baby!" situation like in Amphibia whenever something that would ruin Holly's innocence is about to happen.

💜🌙CatNap🌙💜

Members:

MewZizz - father; 34 years old

Bio: A calm, quiet guy who likes to play music for anyone willing to listen.

FeLune - mother; 33 years old

Bio: The resident "crazy lady"; She has a mysterious aura, but is she really what she seems?

CatNap - son; 11 years old

CatNap isn't by his parents often, but he still shows appreciation for what they do. Sometimes he can be a little embarrassed by the antics of his mom, but he will help her with any errands she needs done. As for his dad, CatNap appreciates the music he comes up with. He occasionally stops by to see his dad perform whenever he's awake.

CatNap's parents care deeply about their son. MewZizz is worried about his son's mental state sometimes, suspicious of the fact that he sleeps so often throughout the day. Though he knows why, he sometimes tries to convince him of better ways to go about the stress. This doesn't usually work since CatNap is so convinced that he just has to stay as calm as possible through proper sleep. Meanwhile, FeLune nags CatNap out of her own worry. Also because of a lot of the many traits they share with each other... She worries about CatNap going through the same judgement she went through, but she attempts to help him whenever he feels stressed about this.

Headcanons:

FeLune had a love-at-first-sight experience with MewZizz. She was always a part of the audience watching his performances. Eventually, she mustered the courage to talk to him, and they shortly got into a relationship afterward. For MewZizz, he loved FeLune's support and the quirks she had, so he quickly fell in love with her in a similar way.

The poppy gas CatNap has as his second scent came from FeLune's side of the family. FeLune herself had to deal with poppy gas, but she managed to control it to a healthy level. However, before she did, she would often get flak for having this ability, being deemed a monster by many for having it. As a result, this affects the way she feels about her son's poppy gas. She worries a lot about if people found out about this. Little did she know, her excessive worry about it is also what drove CatNap's own fear of the others finding out about his ability.

MewZizz often played lullabies for CatNap when he was younger. CatNap has fond memories of these lullabies, and he even hums them himself whenever he helps put others to sleep.

MewZizz and FeLune are very openly romantic in public. They do a lot of PDA, and sometimes this gets on CatNap's nerves because of how openly they do it.

FeLune was able to have their home installed with their own observatory. Besides his own bedroom, CatNap finds the observatory to be his favorite place to unwind.

(Phew... This took so long to make with the designs and descriptions =v=' I'm sorry for not posting about the AU in a while. I hope this makes up for it- Also tried to not be exactly the same as the existing family dynamics other people came up with for their own interpretations of the Smiling Critters- It's their original OCs after all- I did still get inspired by some things. If anyone has an issue with this, let me know and I'll work something out with my own characters since I don't want to copy off of anyone T^T)

Hope you guys enjoyed this (long) post!

🩷❤️🧡💛💚🩵💙💜

#smiling critters au #smiling critters #justsomepersonalhcs #dogday #pickypiggy #craftycorn #kickinchicken #bubba bubbaphant #bobby bearhug #hoppy hopscotch #catnap

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chaifootsteps · 17 days

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curious question - are the 'it's wrong to want bad things to happen to Valentino' crowd applying the same logic everywhere?

I ask because (for those who watch both hh & hb) I've seen a consistent pattern of violence being wished on Stella and (occasionally) Blitzo (no prizes for guessing what the thing these two characters have in common that has got fans wishing violence on them)

I mean wasn't there like a whole comic on the hb subreddit awhile back of Stolas slapping Stella across the face? (not to mention the not so hidden undertone of misogny in fanfics where Stolas & Blitzo have a fun old time calling her every name for 'bimbo' -or worse - under the sun) And a comment or two about how good it would be to see Stolas commit domestic violence/kidnapping/whatever else against Blitzo because he apparently deserves it?

and yet when the character is Valentino, who is written as a rapist and abuser on purpose (by which I mean Viv meant to do it, whereas it's anyone's guess if she realized Stolas was also that in HB or if she decided it didn't count the same as Valentino as far back as Murder Family given the very next episode was devoted to making Stolas sympathetic even if he was still allowed to be flawed at that point in time) suddenly parts of the fanbase is insisting it's wrong to hate him or want to see him gone?

I'm sure this is just a thing specific to this fandom, I doubt they do this w/other shows because it feels so clearly a result of Viv (and maybe Raph, idk) making such a point of how much they like Valentino. in any other scenario it would be understood that hating this character is the intended audience reaction and that fiction is a safe and cathartic means of wanting to watch that moth demon get squashed for everything he's done

They're most definitely not applying the same logic everywhere. By their logic, it's not only perfectly fine, but a person's moral duty to wish harm on both characters like Stella (or else you're a disgusting abuse apologist) and real people they don't like (Idolomantises, me). But when it's a character they like...well, you see where we are.

Hypocrisy doesn't even begin to cover it. Their logic literally changes by the minute.

#Anonymous #viv stuff #actual blog post #vivziepop fandom

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ircn-dad · 2 years

Text

Sometimes I think about Tony's life before Iron Man and I just feel bad for that man.

He spent his entire childhoods in a house where he wasn't loved for who he was. His dad didn't payed attention to him and mentally abused him (idk if in the MCU he was physically abused too, but I wouldn't be surprised if he was), his Mother- even if she wasn't bad and was lovely- always tried to justify Howard's action towards him (during the BARF scene we can see an example of her actions). Living in a house like this, where you feel no one is at your side is exhausting. Where everyone expect from you the best, and even if you try it, you won't ever be enough for your parents.

He entered at MIT at only fourteen, so that means (I guess) he never went to school with his peers. At seven years old he enters at the Philips Academy and it's a secondary school. Despite his outgoing behaviour, I don't think a little kid is comfortable around people much older. I don't think he even had real friends before going to MIT because even if he was more mature than his age, I don't believe a lot of teenagers or pre teens were ready to befriend with a kid.

So, no friends at school and not a good relationship with his family. He must have felt lonely for 14 years, and when he goes to MIT he decides to change. He puts a mask on and begins his new behaviour. He starts going to parties, to drink and to act cool around people to be liked and appreciated. I remember reading some fake testimonials that Marvel made to honorate the release of Iron Man 3, testimonials about how some ex students remembered Tony at MIT and two of them said:

“No one really knew him, he was just a rich kid. Everyone wanted him around, though, because he'd always bring something fun for the party.”

“I remember him at after-parties on Thayer Street. He was up later than anyone else. But you could always get a ride home with him, because he always had a car.”

No one knows the real him because that's what he does: he hides him self behind parties, fun and this kind of stuff to just be noticed by someone. Some people might say that he just wants to be at the centre of the attention, and yes that's true and it is a bad thing, but ever wondered why? Imagine being a kid, who has no friends, who's father hates you and you feel like no one will ever love you, until you find a way to be finally appreciated. You found a way to have someone who notices you after years of loneliness. I can't speak for everyone, but I would have done the same thing.

He keeps doing this for years and years. He lost his parents, he lost Jarvis and he has to take responsibility for his father's company at 21. He doesn't want that, he just wants to have fun and to distract him self from the reality because half of his life, at the time, was just empty, with no one taking care of him. So he practically leaves the company to Obadiah and he just spends more than 10 years trying to fill that void.

Why do you think he was a playboy?

Now... I don't know if that could be possible in the MCU, but in the comics he was assaulted at fourteen by a woman who was way older thank him That was the first time ever he was touched by someone like that, and even if he was a genius I wouldn't be too surprised (again) to find out he was taking refuge from his problems in s*x. He probably thought that was love, that the only reason someone could really love him was to make s*x with them and to make them feel pleasured (we could apply this logic even if he wasn't assaulted). I can think of other fictional characters who are Playboys (Barney Stinson from "how I met your mother" for example) in which is heavily implied that the only reason they act that way is because they need to feel loved.

Ten years of doing this, and you think he would be able to recover? Ofc no.

He has Rhodey, He has Pepper, He has Happy (and he has Obadiah but we don't talk about that man in this house), He has moneys, fame, he can finally have fun, he can drink and have all the women he wants. His life seems perfect, but we all know that's a lie.

He has everything, but he still has nothing, as Yinsen said.

And Tony, after being kidnapped for three months knows that. He knows his whole life was empty at that point. He said it him self when Yinsen asked him if he had a family out the cave. He just said no, he thinks no one is waiting for him to come back. For 38 years of his life he had nothing to live for, and even though we know how much his friends cared about him, he's not aware of that because he thinks they care for the mask he created for him self when he was young. At the age of 38, he still thinks no one could ever love the real him, because he doesn't love him self.

That's why I hate when people says he's immature, narcissistic and egocentric. Is he aware he is a genius? Yes. It's not bad to know that, especially when everyone expected him to be one since he was born. But that doesn't mean he's narcissistic. He acts like he's better than everyone else, but in reality he feels like the worst person ever. How can a narcissistic person think how their girlfriend deserves so much better than him? (As he said in Iron man 3). How can someone be egocentric and then puts other's life before him every single time, or when he's one of the few who cared for everyone, and who was ready to sacrifice himself for a world who never loved him? How can people even assume he thinks he's better than everyone when he admits himself he's just a man in a tin can?

If you can't see that during all the movies that he covers him self with an armour- not iron man, an INVISIBLE ARMOUR made of humour, sarcasm and fake self-esteem- to protect him self from further pain, then I suggest you to rewatch the movies.

Tony Stark is one of the most human and well written characters in the MCU, it's sad that not a lot of fans (and almost everyone in the marvel universe as well) can't see that.

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